#with! again! the weirdest fucking rash!

[stylishanachronism]

As a professional courtesy, unless your dog is a service animal, *please* do not bring them into the bank in general, and specifically not into your appointment with the banker.

#nobody wants them in the lobby #*i* do not want them in my office #I am not a huge dog person + it upsets the cats when I get home #IF YOUR DOG HAS A WEIRD RASH I ESPECIALLY DONT WANT TGEM ANYWHERE NEAR ME #in other news a member brought their very large very stinky lad with the weirdest fucking rash into my office today #fortunately they were my last appointment because we had to febreeze the shit out of it and it may not be usable tomorrow #I am also not a huge big dog fan and it was a Very Friendly dog #with! again! the weirdest fucking rash! #so I stripped down in the garage when I got home and threw everything I was wearing in the laundry and then decontaminated myself to boot #because I don’t know what it was but I Do Not want the children ending up with it

[olichat-reads]

Mountain

Bakugou x reader

Summary: Your love for Bakugou is like a mountain but even mountains crack & crumble eventually, don't they?

Warnings: angst :D like all the way. its just angst. maybe w a sprinkle of fluff. major character death not katsu dw.

A/n: its one in the morning & i chose violence 😂😌 here's to the first proper angsty fic i've ever written. please join my mourning.

🌟

"Hey, Katsu. I know this is pretty selfish of me. And I know this will be nothing but a nuisance to you. Even so.." you trailed off, lifting your gaze off the ground to meet those ruby eyes you've fallen for, practiaclly beaming up at him.

"I like you, Katsuki!"

That was the day it all started, the day your friendship changed.

Bakugou & Y/n. The two of you were a well known pair amongst the students in UA & everyone in your presence in general. Everyone knew the explosive blonde who was loud, rash & rude, the ambitious Bakugou Katsuki who vowed to devote his life to become the future number one hero.

Then there was you, his bestfriend since childhood. The complete opposite of the angry blonde- a good natured, friendly chatterbug who is seemingly blind to her bestfriend's outright menacing demeanor, Bakugou's happy second shadow he can't seem to get rid of. You made quite the jarring pair indeed. But being friends with Bakugou came to you easily.

It was no wonder loving him felt just as simple. Regardless of your feelings being unrequited.

Somehow, despite having attempted crossing the line of platonic friends, you managed to keep your friendship with Bakugou. Persistent enough to stay by his side. Never allowing things to be awkward. Sometimes it felt like nothing ever changed, like you were the same annoying bestfriend that stuck by him growing up.

And sometimes you'd randomly blurt out your feelings for him when he so much as buys you your favourite drink on a whim.

"Aahhh Katsuki I love you-"

"Why the fuck must you go out & say it at the weirdest times?!"

"I can't help it! I have so much love for you y'know? Sometimes it just overflows! Especially when you're so nice to me!"

"I'm never being nice to you again, dammit!"

☆

Every valentine's day held a memory Bakugou obtained against his will.

"Bakugou Katsuki, please go out with me!"

"Hah? Is this whats got you so damn twitchy all day?"

"Aw come on! I'm asking out the guy I like here. Of course I'm nervous!" You pout childishly, still holding out the black box of chocolates wrapped neatly in an orange bow.

"Tch. As if you haven't been doing that every other day for the past 2 years. Whats left to be nervous about?" He rolled his eyes at the ridiculousness of it all. Shifting his attention to the box in your hands, he narrowed his eyes as if it personally insulted him, before returning his annoyed gaze to you.

"You know I'm not taking it. When are you going to learn that this ain't going nowhere, hah?"

"Ugh, you meanie," you huffed, flopping down in Midoriya's empty seat, spinning it round to face the grumbling blonde's desk. "Its always worth a shot," you mumbled out. Undoing the the ribbons, you'd open the box & share the chocolates with him. Chattering about your internship & studies as if you didn't just got rejected by him.

☆

He asked once, after rejecting you yet again, if you were ever going to give up on your feelings for him. If you were ever going to realize that your efforts were futile & there was nothing for you to keep fighting for.

"I can't give up so easily, silly! My love for you is so heavy, it feels like I'd suffocate sometimes you know. Its like- like a mountain!" You explained eagerly, hands waving in the air to emphasis your point.

"Tsk. And what happens when you run out hm? What happens when that mountain chips away bit by bit, until there's nothing left?"

He'd seen it that day. Something flickering in your eyes just for a second, disappearing before he could put a finger on what it was, replaced by that same stupid smile you always wore.

"Wah~ I'd actually be crushed, huh? Who knows if I'd survive~" you sang out playfully.

It was hurt.

He recognized it now. Who knew how many more times you've blinked that look away, locked up the agony he inflicted upon your heart that only yearned for him to accept its love. How many times that stupid smile masked the heartbreak underneath. How many times he convinced himself it was fine, because you were smiling. That you were fine.

"Goddamn idiot."

☆

Your love for him was like a mountain, you'd say. He wondered if it hurt, every time he chipped of a piece by his harsh words. He wondered if it pained you everytime his rejection made a little of that love crumble.

There were times you'd appear at his door in the middle of the night. So late, that you didn't wear that smile & he didn't yell at you for waking him up, both of you too tired to keep your own walls up to notice the others' was down. You'd look so tired, so small & frail, like a broken soul defeated by life itself. Yet something would still faintly sparkle in your eyes, no matter how dull, when you looked up at him apologetically.

Neither of you would speak. You'd climb into bed with him & hide away in his chest. He'd never see it, having you curled uo so tightly against him, but he knew you'd cry yourself to sleep, feeling the tremble in your body & the tears soaking his shirt. He'd stay awake until your breathing finally evened out.

He'd never ask you. Everything seemed like a dream the next day. He'd wake up alone, no signs of your late night visit. He'd see you in class as usual, the spark back in your eyes as bright as ever, as if it never dimmed in the first place. You'd act as you always would, bubbly & way too excited.

He never knew what had you crying on those nights.

He'd be convinced he dreamt up the night before if you didn't address it in your own subtle way.

When Mina & Kaminari would go on their daily pestering about your blatant crush on your bestfriend. Moaning for you to just go out with one of them instead, whining why you'd waste your feelings on their grumpy friend while you giggled at their antics.

"How could I not love Katsu," you'd say, subtly locking your eyes with him from across the classroom. Something soft & grateful in your gaze before you turned back to your noisy friends.

☆

Your heart seemed thethered to him no matter what he does.

He remembered the time you burst into recovery girl's office. You've been away on your internship. You must have heard about his incident from your classmates when you got back. Knowing them, they must've made a bigger deal off his injuries than they actually were.

He'd jump slightly as the door slammed open to reveal you- wide eyed & panting. Your frantic gaze searched the room until they landed on him, scanning him for the severity of his injuries.

Having seen he was okay, that he was conscious & well, you all but fell to your knees, the last of the adrenaline seeming to have drained from your exhausted body.

"Fuck," you breathed out a shaky laugh. "Fuck, Katsu. That's bad for my heart."

He saw you crying that night, tears wetting your cheeks & dripping off your face. Yet you still wore that smile, as wobbly as it was.

He hated that stupid smile.

Even now, as you lay on the hospital, it never leaves your face. That dopey, lovesick expression looked terribly out of place on your broken body.

"I thought you loved me, hah? Was that a lie? If you love me then hold on, you little shit. You want me to love back, don't you? Then, stay alive. Don't you dare die on me now or I'll kill you myself, you hear?" He heard his own voice crack, felt his cheeks grew wet, but he didn't care.

"Fuck. Fuck. I love you too, you fucking dumbass."

You laughed at that. It sounded wrong. Weak & frail, muffled by the oxygen mask that was barely helping your shallow breaths. Yet, it was just as melodic as Bakugou remembered. It has always been such a pretty sound.

"Thank you, Katsu."

☆

Standing at the edge of the beach alone, he felt as though he could almost hear you laughing by his side as he looked on at the blue sea. Just as you did all those time you pestered him into going to 'your favourite place in the entire world' you claimed.

"Because this is the place I fell in love with you," you'd tell him every single time. Recalling the day your entire world changed & your heart grew twice its size with love for your bestfriend.

"Sounds fucking cursed." His response the same each time as he watched the waves crash into the shore, lightly lapping at his feet.

And you'd laugh something so happy & free in the golden light of the setting sun, the bubbly joy so contagious, he couldn't help but crack a smile.

He holds onto the memory, keeps it safe in his heart as to never forget what your laughter sounded like, worried one day he'll forget.

Its been awhile since he heard it after all.

5 years felt like forever with the emptiness you left behind.

His life felt too quiet with you no longer around to fill the silence. It left his heart heavy. He could almost hear your teasing at the thought.

'I thought you said you'd enjoy the peace & quiet when I'm no longer around, hm, Katsu? Gonna finally admit that you were wrong?'

It was a weird feeling. He knew you so well, he could guess what you'd say to him as if you were still around. Could almost hear it, to the point it felt like he was talking to a ghost of you.

Somedays it was comforting. Other days it felt like a knife twisting in his chest.

"I miss you, stupid."

'I know, Katsu.'

Sometimes Bakugou wondered.

If he hadn't left so many cracks in your mountain, if he hadn't let it crumble & chip away along the years, would you have had enough love to stay alive?

🌟

A/n: i can't believe i actually wrote this in one sitting. i feel like i'd hate the formating when i reread this tomorrow morning. but hey i hope you enjoy the read. or broke your heart. one of those.

#bakugou x reader #bakugou katuski x reader #bakugou angst #bakugou katsuki #mha bakugou #oliwrites

[somehwere-between]

witching hour + curly 💛

I honestly forgot what a witching hour even meant so oops. Also this one will be long lol

Curly’s digging the heels of his palms into his eyes and trying hard not to lose it on Tim. Tim was having one of those weird episodes where he can’t even get out of bed, let alone try to raise a fucking kid. Curly was used to it, somewhat, but the kid part was new.

“Fucking Christ, Tim, jus’ get the hell up!” He’s halfway to praying and halfway to strangling Tim. “You know I ain’t ever changed a diaper in my fuckin’ life an’ now ain’t the best damn time.” He was supposed to be out with some “friends”, you know, the ones you call friends but you would kill them if it meant saving your own skin.

Tim rolls on his side but has this glaze over his eyes. He looks dead, and probably feels fucking dead too.

“What, you and Winston change places?”

Tim doesn’t respond for a second. “Get me a cigarette.”

Curly kicks the shitty bedframe. He won’t actually get out of bed, so it’s up to Curly to change Jay. “I’ll get ya one if you teach me how to change a diaper.”

“Alright.”

That’s the weirdest fucking trade Curly has ever made. A cigarette for a diaper-changing lesson. Not exactly enviable— or whatever that word is that Ponyboy Curtis used to be obsessed with years ago. Something to do with jealousy. Or rich white assholes. Something like that.

xx

Curly’s digging through the ice box for a couple of beers and maybe a stray Kool box hidden under an empty can. It should’ve been there, unless Angela or that bitch Tim got suckered into marrying stole it. When he finds it, he pockets it and kicks the ice box again for good measure.

Jay’s still crying. He doesn’t want to admit, but hearing his nephew’s cries actually hurt. A sort of felt-in-the-soul hurt. Right now it’s just annoying, but when it’s genuine, it hurts. Curly drops off the beers in Tim’s shambled room and heads across the hall.

“Shh.” He tries rocking Jay. It’s not soothing in any English meaning of the word. “I know you’re tired of sittin’ in your own shit but I need to learn how to help ya before I actually help ya.” He glances back down the hall. “Hang tight, bud.”

xx

Curly’s pulling everything out of the hallway closet looking for that damn foldable table that Tim was talking about. He could’ve sworn he saw one really fat-ass rat, but it might’ve just been a preexisting stain on the tacky carpet that he’d never noticed. “Fuckin’— Hey! Tim! Is it s’posed to be white an’ blue?”

“Yeah,” Tim yells back. “that’s the one.”

Curly yanks it out.

“Okay, here. Can you set it up?”

Tim shrugs. He still has that glazed look, but at least his face has some color. That’s better than yesterday at least. “Sure.”

“Where are the diapers?”

“Kitchen cabinet with the fucked-up handle, near the ice box.” Tim takes a drag on his Kool. “Should have a label on it, in Sharpie.”

It doesn’t take long, and Curly comes back to the room with a diaper. “Is this it?”

“No, you need powder.”

“Powder?” Curly pauses. “You’re plannin’ on givin’ your kid cocaine?”

Tim flicks his ashes at him. “No, fuckin’ moron. Baby powder.”

Curly lights a cigarette for himself. “The hell does a baby need powder for?”

“Helps with rashes or some shit, I don’t know.” Tim sighs. “Should be in the same box as the diapers.”

“Well, it ain’t.”

“You haven’t even looked.”

Curly groans. “I did look, an’ I didn’t see any powder earlier.”

Tim shakes his head. “Fine. Whatever, just grab some paper towels an’ we’ll figure it out.”

xx

“Like this?” Curly has his nose covered with his shirt and is trying to put on a fresh diaper. Tim sits on the edge of his bed, staring.

“Yeah. You’re doin’ alright for a first-timer.”

“What, your wife say that to you too?”

Tim sighs, and Curly grins. Jay, despite not understanding a damn word of the English language, laughs too.

“Who woulda guessed, your kid has a better sense of humor than you.” Curly’s still smirking when he attaches the sticky part of the diaper down so that it’ll stay. It’s a bit lopsided and ugly, but Jay doesn’t seem to mind.

“Hilarious.”

“Good job, Jay, you’re already pissin’ your old man off an’ you’re not even one. Carryin’ on the family legacy.” Curly scoops up the now-clean Jay. He looks at Tim. “You wanna hold your kid?”

Tim shrugs. “Sure.”

Jay immediately squirms away from Curly as soon as he sees his dad. Tim’s not exactly smiling, but he’s happier now. “What were ya doin’ up at the witching hour, pal? You’re s’posed to be asleep. You know, like what you do all day.”

Curly bites back a laugh. Sometimes Tim’s dryness can be funny. Sometimes.

xx

Curly’s sitting on the couch at some lousy motel because Tim’s slut of a wife kicked him out and his mom won’t let him in the house. It’s a real damn drag. He calls Tim.

“Hey, wanted to check in on ya. I know you’re havin’ one of those episodes again.”

He stops, unsure of what to say. He wishes that Ponyboy was still in town so that he could tell him all the answers just like he did in high school anatomy class. The only class, outside of gym, that he actually got an A in.

“Jus’ wanted to say, uh… that you owe me a beer. That diaper was a goddamn nuke all by itself.”

Not quite what he wanted to say, but fuck it. Can’t go back now.

“Call me back when you can.”

He bites back what he wanted to say— I love you.

#sorry this is so damn long #the outsiders #my writing #curly shepard #tim shepard

[xxgoblin-dumplingxx]

Mission of Mercy: Five

“Bucky,” you protest, “I’m okay.”

Bucky frowned and tilted your chin up, wanting to get a better look at your busted lip and gently dabbed at it with his now damp handkerchief. “I guess that answers my question about what you actually do,” he said, keeping his voice very, very quiet. He didn’t trust himself not to yell. He wanted to shake you until your teeth rattled. And then kiss you stupid. And then maybe shake you again. 

He was so happy you were alive but… furious at you for running headlong into the fight to start with. In his mind’s eye, he could see an old man. Standing at his window and mourning another lost loved one. His shoulders were bowed and there was a cup. A leather cup on the table that held dice. And he couldn’t make himself put them away. But he couldn’t look at them either. For some absurd reason, that bothered him more than the thought he might have lost you. Or that your mother would have to bury… or pretend to bury another child. 

You don’t answer him, looking away. It was true, you had a specific specialty. You could talk. And not just talk. You could read people so well that you could get inside their heads. Make them believe you already knew things you had no earthly way to know…And now Bucky knew that you could do it. Something that you weren’t sure how to feel about. You didn’t advertise your talents… nor did you use them terribly often. But. You could understand why Bucky might be… reticent to spend much more time around you than he had to. And you could feel yourself bracing for a “let’s be friend’s speech” or a cold, brooding silence. 

The man watched you avert your eyes to the dirt and dust that coated your hands. And having seen you in action, he was acutely aware of two things. You were dangerous and most importantly, if he’d kept his mouth shut, the building would not have exploded. 

__________

Across the lot Sam meant to start forward. He meant to talk to you. Or Pull Bucky away from you, he wasn’t sure. The other man looked quietly furious and Sam felt a knee jerk reaction to protect you. Even if he knew you didn’t need it. 

But. Steve threw an arm across his chest and shot him a warning look, mindful of Bucky’s hearing. And Sam felt himself relax. It was good to know that he wasn’t the only one paying attention. And as Sam glanced around, taking a second to take his eyes off of you, he noticed that a lot of people were watching. Albeit, a lot less obviously. 

_____________

For a long time. Bucky was quiet. And you let it be. Letting it stretch out ahead of you like unspooling ribbon. Letting him think. But when he finally did speak, you started. 

“I think it’s safe to say I’m not the weirdest person in this relationship,” Bucky said, smiling a little.  And you chanced looking up at him.

Bucky kissed you gently on the forehead, mindful of a wicked spot of road rash near your hairline. “You’re a 105 and have a metal arm,” you protest, smiling a little. “I just cold read like a shitty fake psychic.”

“That’s more than cold reading, Darlin’,” he said softly, brushing a metal thumb against your cheek. “That man didn’t stand a chance… until I opened my dumbass mouth.”

“You’re not mad at me?” you ask him. 

“Furious with you,” he chuckled, “But. Not because you can get in people’s heads. What the fuck were you doing, doing it without backup?”

“They always send me in alone… Or mostly alone,” you answer. “It can get pretty upsetting to watch me find pressure points. We had a rookie agent take a shot at me once… So.”

Bucky frowned, “What- no. Not anymore they don’t.”

“Bucky,” you caution.

‘No,” Bucky said softly, “I’m pulling rank. Sam or I are going with you from now on. ‘Specially now that I know to shut up.”

“But-”

“He’s got a point, Y/N.”

Steve’s voice makes you both turn and you sigh, “Steve-”

“No really,” Steve said smiling a little, “If we’re sending you in unarmed, you need some kind of backup.”

“I’m never unarmed,” you snorted. 

“Maybe not,” Steve chuckled, “But you can’t exactly talk to a bullet.”

“I can talk to the person firing it… Or better. Let them talk. Talking people usually aren’t shooting.”

Bucky sighed and pulled you against his chest, resting his chin against the top of your head. Steve made a tactful retreat and Bucky kissed the top of your head. “I thought I lost you for a second,” he said softly. 

“I’m like a bad penny,” you say smiling a little, “You can’t get rid of me.”

Bucky couldn’t say anything to that. He just tightened his grip on you and kissed the top of your head again. Thankful that you had gotten out of the way. Thankful for the adrenaline that had let him throw rubble away from where you had been standing. And for the rest of his life, he’d never forget the relief that washed over him when you picked your way carefully over the debris, coughing and dazed. 

“I called your mom.”

Sam’s voice was the next one to make the two of your tun and you groaned. 

“Why?”

“A fucking building came down on your head,” he groused, “And for about 10 minutes we figured you were under it.”

“Sam-”

“She’s your emergency contact!”

“Did you get her on the phone?”

“I left her a voice mail and told her to call me,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck.

You snort and exhale slowly, “She’s probably most of the way into her margarita at the swim-up bar. I’ll talk to her tomorrow too.”

Bucky frowned but didn’t say anything. He knew, of course that your relationship with your mother was… strained to put it lightly. Though. When he said he knew, he only knew from overheard snippets of phone calls. Even if private, you never talked too much about your family. Not of the brother that you lost or the dad you never really knew… if you knew him at all. And not of your mom. The closest thing Bucky got to gossip or real information was the little things that Sam or Joe had told him. Or rather… let slip out of your earshot. But. Regardless. He filed this away for later. It was one more piece of the puzzle that made up who you are.

#Bucky x reader #winter soldier #Steve Rogers #sam wilson #hurt/comfort #fluff #angst

[blacktofade]

This is approximately 3 million years late, but what’s up. I’m still alive. Hope you’re all okay.

*

“It’s getting long,” Ryan says apropos of nothing on a Thursday evening.

Shane looks up from his phone and glances over. “What?”

“Your hair,” Ryan clarifies. “It’s getting long.”

Apart from Anthony, who’s quietly clicking away at an edit in the back of the office, Shane and Ryan are alone. It’s already dark outside, the spring nights still closing in quickly, and honestly, Shane would have left a long while ago, but he’s lost track of time.

On his desk is his abandoned beanie. He doesn’t remember pulling it off, but he’s not surprised it’s there. He gets a hot head and has picked up a habit of raking his fingers through his long hair, which accidentally shoves off anything in the way, hats and headphones included.

“Oh,” Shane says. “Yeah.”

Ryan leans in, reaching up to flick a strand of hair out of Shane’s eyes. “You haven’t cut it.”

Shane shrugs and pushes his fingers through it, tucking some behind his ears. “I kinda like it.”

Ryan’s gaze skitters across his face. “I do, too.”

Shane doesn’t think there’s anything he can say to that.

“You could go longer,” Ryan tells him. “You could do a lot with it.”

Shane leans back in his chair. “I could braid it.”

“You shouldn’t hide it under your hats.”

“You like a good hat,” Shane points out. “Seems hypocritical.”

“Maybe I like your hair more than I like hats.”

Shane spares a glance back at Anthony, who has his headphones on and doesn’t seem to even know they’re there.

“You suddenly have a lot of opinions about my hair,” Shane says looking at him again and Ryan shrugs.

“I like it long.”

“So you’ve said.”

Ryan rubs the bridge of his nose. “How long do you think you’ll let it get?”

Shane grabs a nearby pen, using it to occupy his antsy hands. “I think you’ve thought about this a lot more than I have.”

“You were the one who decided to grow it out,” Ryan scoffs, clearly trying to save face. “You’ve gotta have a general plan.”

“No,” Shane insists. “I just missed a haircut, which was fine until you decided I deserved the third degree about it.”

“I’m not giving you the third degree,” Ryan tries and Shane lifts an eyebrow.

“So there’s no newfound interest in my hair.”

“I mean, it’s hard to ignore,” Ryan says, gesturing vaguely at Shane’s head. After a lack of reaction from Shane, he huffs in frustration and leans over, reaching into Shane’s space.

The second Ryan’s fingers curl into Shane’s hair, part of Shane’s brain yells that he should pull away, but overwhelmed by unexpectedness, the rest of his brain freezes and he can’t move at all.

“Look how thick it is,” Ryan mutters, raking his fingers the wrong way through Shane’s hair to muss it. Shane washed it that morning, which means it’s fluffy and unstyled. He hadn’t even put gel in it because he’d planned on covering it with his hat. “You missed one haircut and this is what happened?”

“It started with one missed haircut,” Shane explains softly, half afraid to move his mouth too much and draw attention to the quickly growing weirdness of the situation.

“It’s been months,” Ryan continues idly, fingers shifting in a way that Shane can’t predict, that keeps him on edge.

“Sure,” he agrees, glancing at the inside of Ryan’s elbow and the flex of his arm as he holds it aloft.

“I can just grab a whole handful,” Ryan announces, and Shane finds all the air suddenly rushing out of his lungs as Ryan tightens his grip and does just that. It tugs at the roots of his hair, tipping his head in the direction of Ryan’s hold.

Shane doesn’t expect to let out the noise he does, least of all one that sounds horrifically sexual in every way possible.

Ryan pauses and their eyes meet in what could be the longest second of Shane’s life. And just like that, Ryan’s letting go, pulling away like he’s just burned his hand on a stovetop.

“Fuck,” Ryan says, blinking like he’s only just realizing what’s happening. He glances to his right, towards where Shane knows Anthony is still working, but he turns back to Shane almost immediately and Shane knows Anthony hasn’t noticed. “Jesus. Sorry.”

Shane doesn’t think sorry covers any part of it.

“I shouldn’t have done that.”

Shane should say something like you’re right or try to make a joke about being the next Fabio, but instead he does nothing, just keeps quiet.

“I didn’t think,” Ryan admits. “I just — ” he flexes his hand and Shane understands. Ryan has a habit of doing that — just acting without thinking.

“It’s fine,” Shane finds himself saying, because it’s easier than anything else.

“I just — ” Ryan starts and Shane can’t let him finish the thought.

“It’s late,” Shane interrupts. “I should go.”

He pulls his hat on because he feels strangely vulnerable with his hair exposed now, but the action doesn’t seem to be lost on Ryan, who quickly glances away, probably already internalizing things.

“Don’t go because of me,” Ryan says and Shane shakes his head like Ryan’s not the issue.

“It’s late,” he repeats.

It doesn’t feel right to leave with things left unspoken, but Shane knows that sometimes it’s best to let sleeping dogs lie.

He undocks his laptop and slips it into his bag, ready to go in the blink of an eye, already an expert on extracting himself from awkward situations.

“You’ll be in early for the meeting tomorrow?” Ryan asks, clearly grappling for something just to make sure they’re okay.

Shane knows him. He holds Ryan’s gaze as he says, “Yeah, I’ll be here.” Meaning, it’s okay, you haven’t scared me off completely.

Ryan nods, adjusting a post-it note on his desk, like it’s the thing he’s most worried about. “Okay, cool. I’ll see you later.”

Shane tips his head in response and carefully slips past him to leave.

He takes a moment to lean against the office door, letting out a heavy breath as he adjusts his beanie. It feels like something too huge to think about...so he just doesn’t. He shifts the strap of his bag onto his shoulder more securely and then heads down the hallway towards the elevator.

He’s just pushed the call button for the elevator when he hears the office door open and close behind him. He’s not entirely surprised when he turns to find Ryan standing there, five or six paces away, but that doesn’t mean it makes sense.

“Did I forget something?” he asks, but Ryan’s quick to shake his head.

“No, I — I think it’s hot,” Ryan says instead and it feels like the continuation of a conversation Shane doesn't remember having with him.

“In the office?”

“Your hair,” Ryan explains, taking three steps closer, and the bottom of Shane’s stomach drops like he’s staggered backwards and plummeted straight down the elevator shaft. “The longer it gets, the hotter it is.”

Shane grabs the strap of his bag, his whole body feeling unsteady, like the slightest push might send him sprawling.

“What?” he says. “Is this a bit?”

“God, I wish,” Ryan mutters, shoving his fingers through his own hair to push it out of his face. “It would make it so much easier.”

Shane stares at him silently because for once in his life, Ryan has rendered him speechless. He has no idea how to respond or even how to act natural. It’s like he’s suddenly become aware of each breath he takes, which only makes it harder to remember how to breathe normally.

“It’s been driving me crazy,” Ryan continues like he just doesn’t know when to quit. “Every time I look at you, I just want to — ” He raises his hands and clenches them into fists.

“You want to fight me?” Shane asks, because it turns out that when he panics, he deflects with humor.

“Yeah, sorta,” Ryan says with a snort. “But I also want to get my hands in your hair.”

The thought makes Shane’s legs feel weak. “That’s new.”

“Yeah, tell me about it,” Ryan says not realizing Shane’s talking to himself. “Bad timing, huh?”

“No better time to hit on your coworker than after starting a company with them.”

“I thought I was hitting on my friend,” Ryan tells him, which makes Shane swallow thickly.

Behind him, the elevator dings, having finally arrived, the doors quietly sliding open. Shane glances backwards at it, knowing it’s his one chance to escape. He could duck inside and be out of the building before Ryan even realizes he’s fleeing. He could keep his head down and wait for whatever it is that’s happening to pass.

Instead, after a long minute, he watches the doors close and turns back to Ryan. “This is a bad idea,” he says and Ryan nods in agreement, his eyes seeming brighter with the knowledge that Shane hasn’t immediately left, that Shane hasn’t rebuffed him.

He takes a step closer to Shane, staring up at him. Shane doesn’t know what to do, so he does nothing. He watches as Ryan reaches up, slowly so as to give Shane time to move if he wants to, but Shane doesn’t. He pulls Shane’s beanie off with a deliberate tug, freeing Shane’s hair.

He tucks it into the front pocket of Shane’s bag, which shouldn’t feel illicit, but does anyway. Shane feels his pulse begin to quicken as Ryan leans in, hands raised as he slides his fingers into Shane’s hair, sighing like it’s all he’s ever wanted.

“It’s soft,” Ryan tells him, like it’s not the weirdest thing he’s done and said. He cards his fingers through it a few times, parting it to one side and then the other, as though he can’t decide which way is his favorite. Eventually, he pushes one hand around to the back of Shane’s head, firmly gripping a handful of hair and tugging just enough to rock Shane backwards into the hold. “You liked this earlier.”

Shane lets his eyes shut, senses narrowing in on the dull ache of Ryan pulling again, a little harder this time.

“I’m going to grow it out more,” Shane blurts, which wasn’t what he was planning on saying. He wasn’t going to say anything, in all honesty, and he still hasn’t decided how long he’s going to keep the hair. But one touch from Ryan and he’s apparently making all kinds of rash decisions. “What do you think?”

“I think you already know my answer,” Ryan tells him and it’s a genuine surprise when Ryan pulls him down, pushes up onto his toes, and kisses him.

His mouth is warm and insistent and Shane finds himself automatically gripping Ryan’s shoulders in his surprise. For a second, he thinks he should nudge Ryan away — it’s not the time nor place for it — but instead, he clutches at Ryan’s sweatshirt and Ryan deepens the kiss like he knows exactly what he wants and how he’s going to get it.

Shane doesn’t think a single kiss should be able to change his life so easily. He thought his evening would be uneventful. He’d wrap up work, pick up a pizza, and watch Netflix until he accidentally fell asleep on the couch. Instead, he’s kissing Ryan in the hallway of their office.

He pulls back carefully, a hand on Ryan’s sternum to keep him from leaning back in immediately, and Ryan exhales shakily against his mouth.

“That was unexpected,” he says and Shane lets out a huff of laughter.

“You kissed me.”

"So what,” Ryan argues. “I got caught up in the moment.”

He lets go of Shane’s hair, patting at it in a clear attempt to try to flatten it again.

“Not the best place for this,” Shane admits and Ryan steps back, rubbing a hand over his face like he still can’t believe what he’s done. Honestly. Shane can’t either. Ryan lets out a long breath and looks at him.

“Did you already order a Lyft?”

“No,” Shane admits. “Not yet.”

“I can give you a ride, if you want,” Ryan offers and Shane raises an eyebrow at him.

“How many bases are you planning on rounding tonight?”

Ryan laughs, but shrugs casually. “As many as you’ll let me.”

It would definitely be a change of pace from falling asleep on the couch, he thinks, which might be why he finds himself automatically nodding, intrigued by the possibilities.

“If you’re lucky, I might even let you explain the rules of baseball to me.”

“Would that be considered foreplay?” Ryan asks with a quirk of his mouth and Shane gives him a gentle push back a step.

“I’ll meet you in the lobby downstairs,” he says instead of answering and Ryan almost trips over his own feet in his hurry to turn back towards the office.

“I’ll be five minutes,” Ryan says over his shoulder, already halfway down the hallway and Shane lets out a quiet laugh, watching him go.

“Sure,” Shane agrees. “See you in five.”

#shyan #fic: watcher #thing wot i wrote #fic #lovely anon #answer

[sassy-starker]

Five Times Stark Industries Employees Saw Peter Parker

(And One Time They All Found Out Who He Was)

Word count: 9128

CW: none

Notes: I promised @tony-is-my-daddy that I would tag them in my fluff fic and that was literally almost 2 weeks ago so I’m really, really sorry. I got caught up with finals and everything, but, I finally present to you, A Self-Indulgent Fic Where Peter and Tony Act Sappy And Confuse Employees

1.

Peter couldn’t focus.  His eyes were bleary and his mind was wandering.  His attention was completely taken up by the hollowness in his chest.  The workshop felt all too empty and quiet, but he knew that background noise wouldn’t help.  He needed someone there.  He needed people— hell, even just a person— to be with him.  His mind felt distant, yet all too aware at the same time and it was driving him insane.  He hated the winter.  He hated seasonal affective disorder.  He hated this.

In a rash decision, before his brain could even think, Peter pulled out his Stark Phone and tapped into messages.  He tapped on his most recent contact and began to type.

Peter: hey, do you think i could go down to the intern labs and just work down there?

Peter: like the ones with the individual workspaces?

Peter: i need to be around people

Tony: Of course! I should be done with my meeting at about 5 so then we can go binge shitty rom-coms and cuddle and eat Chinese food

Tony: Pepper saw me on my phone. Gotta go

Peter: <3

Tony: <3

Peter, now with confirmation, gathered up what he was working on in his backpack and shoved his phone in his pocket before getting up and moving to the elevator.

“Where to, Peter?” FRIDAY asked him.

“Fifty-fourth floor please.”

The elevator moved relatively quickly down the floors, and it wasn’t long until it dinged and the doors opened, revealing rows and rows of worktables with interns scattered around and working on individual projects.  Peter knew that they moved on and off the floor, depending on whether they were working in groups with their department or solo.

People looked over to the unknown young man while he set his stuff down on a table.  He paid no mind, feeling comforted by having people around.  He always felt nice when he knew that he wasn’t all alone, that the world was still there and time was still moving on.  Just as he sat down, though, a lab director from some floor below them walked right up to the desk.

“I’m sorry. I don’t think you’re allowed to be here,” he said in a sickly sweet, obviously fake voice.

“Excuse me?” Peter asked politely, looking up to the man.

“This space is for interns and employees. You don’t appear to be either,” the man elaborated.

“No, I’m allowed to be here,” Peter shot back simply before looking away from the man and reaching for his bag to pull out his project materials.

“Who do you think you are?” the lab director interrogated. “I’ll get you kicked out of this building!”

“I’m Peter-” the young adult started, but was cut off by FRIDAY interrupting.

“No last names, Peter,” the AI warned. “We don’t want anything to happen to you.  I can assure that Peter is allowed to be here.”

Peter simply looked up and gave a shrug to the lab director before continuing to pull out the materials from his bag.  The man looked up to the ceiling fearfully before retreating back to his own workspace.

That was the first time they saw Peter.

2.

The next time Stark Industries employees saw Peter could only be described as chaotic.

The door to the stairs opened and somebody rushed out, weaving their way around people and workstations with practiced ease, all while laughing so hard that there were tears falling from their eyes.

Upon closer inspection, the employees realized that it was, in fact, the mysterious young man from only a week earlier.

Moments after Peter rushed in, the elevator dinged and the doors opened, and out ran the Tony Stark, covered in red and blue glitter. Not to mention that he looked furious, but not the type of furious where he was genuinely angry. It was more like that fond kind of furious, where you’re annoyed and upset, but can’t help but find the situation a bit funny and the person responsible is somebody you care about.

Tony ran out of the elevator, also weaving around his employees and their projects, obviously chasing the young man. By that point, though, the young man was laughing so hard that he had slowed down considerably. Thanks to that fact, Tony caught up and tackled him to the ground. All the employees were frozen in shock and just watching as their boss stood up and rubbed glitter off his skin to get it onto the man he was now standing above.

“No!” shouted the younger, getting up from his spot on the floor and giving the engineer a light shove. Both of them were still smiling and laughing about it though. “This is gonna take forever to wash off!”

“How do you think I feel?” Tony retorted, sprinkling some glitter into the other man’s curly hair. Once again, the younger man gave him a light push.

That’s when the two of them became acutely aware of the attention they had garnered.

“Sorry for disrupting your work,” Peter apologized to the crowd of employees sheepishly.

“We’ll send somebody to clean up the mess we made,” Tony told them, eyeing the trail of glitter he had left on the floor, “but get back to work.”

Hesitantly, they all began to go back to their workstations, but kept their eyes on the two men as they talked quietly and walked back to the elevator. Nobody said a word until the elevator doors had closed, obscuring their view of their boss and the mysterious man.

“Who the fuck is that kid?” Ashley questioned, turning to the coworkers she was in an experimenting group with.

“I have no idea,” Dylan answered, slowly tearing his eyes away from the elevator doors.

“He’s definitely a weird one,” Jenna piped up decisively. “I mean, have you ever even seen a picture of Tony Stark smiling that fondly?”

“And he talked back to him!” Dylan added on. “Like, holy shit, that kid shoved him and Stark only laughed!”

“I’ve seen a lot of strange things while working here,” Ashley told them, sparing a glance at the elevator, “but this is definitely one of the strangest.”

3.

“Please?” Peter begged.

“No,” Tony answered for what felt like the hundredth time. “Gossip spreads across the building quickly and basically every employee is already trying to figure out who you are! I don’t want them finding out and leaking it to the press!”

“But they already know, so what does it matter? It’s not like the rumors will go away if they just don’t see me again!” Peter argued, jumping up from where he was seated in order to stand in front of his boyfriend.

“The rumors will die down if they don’t see you again. They’ll eventually move onto talking about something else,” Tony replied, grabbing Peter’s hand and pulling him close. Peter embraced the man and the two just stood there for a few moments.

“I just want you to be safe,” Tony told him quietly.

“I’ll be fine,” Peter responded, pulling away but still holding onto his boyfriend’s hands. “All your employees sign NDA’s, so even if they did leak something to the press, which I doubt they would, legal would be on their ass and sue them for all they’re worth.”

Tony sighed, realizing that Peter had a good argument that he just couldn’t counter.

“Fine. You can come help me with the presentation.”

Peter pumped his fist in the air and let out a whoop in victory, causing Tony to roll his eyes fondly.

+++

When the employees working in R&D walked into the small auditorium on the 16th floor, they knew Tony Stark was going to be there, but they didn’t expect the infamous mystery man to be there.  On the stage, Peter was talking animatedly about something or other while Tony just listened, a fond smile on his face and his eyes sparkling.

The crowd walked in hesitantly, everybody’s eyes on the two men up front, who still hadn’t acknowledged them.  When everyone was seated and the clock struck the exact time the presentation was supposed to start, the two finally turned to them to get started.

“Hello, R&D department! I hope you’re all doing well!” Tony greeted with his press smile on. “You all know who I am, but I have somebody else here with me today.”

“What’s up? I’m Peter,” the younger man introduced himself, hitting the woah as he said his name.

“Did you just-” Tony started with a sigh before cutting himself off. “You and your fucking tiktok dances.”

“You say that as if you didn’t ask me to teach you the Renegade last week!”

“That was different! That was for the Stark Industries tiktok! I need to be relatable so I stay relevant!” Tony defended.

“And yet you still won’t let me teach you the dance to ‘Say So’ even though it’s iconic!” Peter shot back.

“You and I have different ideas of what counts as iconic,” Tony said dryly before turning back to the crowd of employees. 

“Anyway, today Peter and I will be telling you all about the new prosthetics line that your department will begin developing!”

Despite the importance of the presentation, the employees were only half listening as they were more focused on whispering about the mystery boy.

“Okay but what the actual fuck happened at the beginning of this?” Jenna asked quietly as she leaned over to her coworker on the right of her.

“No fucking clue. I can't believe this dude is just casually talking and joking around with Tony fucking Stark!” Dylan whispered in reply, not taking his eyes off the stage.

“And apparently he taught Stark how to do the Renegade. That’s fucking insane,” Ashley added from Jenna’s left.

The three turned their attention back to the two men on stage, finally listening to what they were saying again.

“Street smarts!” the younger man exclaimed, jumping in about something they were saying before.

“Stay alert out there,” both Peter and Tony quoted with large smiles. As if nothing happened, they jumped right back into the presentation.

“This is the weirdest fucking thing in the world,” Dylan declared quietly.

“I second that,” Ashley muttered.

“I third that,” Jenna added on without taking her eyes off the stage.

The presentation went on a bit longer, but it didn’t drag on.  It helped that the entire time the two men were joking around and making the employees progressively more and more confused.

Peter and Tony wrapped up the presentation soon enough and the R&D employees began to file out, most of them keeping their eyes on the two men talking quietly on stage.  Jenna, Ashley, and Dylan walked out together, some of the last to exit the auditorium, and the three made it to the elevator before Jenna realized she left her jacket behind.  She told her friends that she would catch up to them and way back to the now empty seats.  Not paying attention to the world around her, she looked for where she had sat and made her way through the row until she reached her seat and found her cardigan.

“See, I told you it would be okay,” said a voice from the stage.  Jenna turned around and saw Peter talking to Tony, the men standing close together.

“You know I just get worried,” the billionaire replied, his voice more sincere than Jenna could’ve ever imagined. “I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

“I can take care of myself, Tones. You don’t need to worry so much.”

Jenna felt like she was intruding on a private moment, so she started to make her way out of the rows of seats and back to the door as quickly and quietly as possible.

“Just because I don’t need to worry doesn’t mean I won’t. I care so much about you, Peter. You know I love you.”

Jenna froze in place, right at the end of the row of seats and about to step into the main aisle that led to the doors.  Against her better judgment, she found herself staring up at the two men on the stage, her gaze stuck on them.  She just couldn’t look away.

Peter and Tony were basically right up against each other.  They only were a couple inches apart with both their hands intertwined.  She couldn’t see it earlier, but, now that they were right next to each other, Jenna could tell that Peter was about half a foot shorter than Tony.  The younger man was looking up at the billionaire with a bright smile that was returned.  It was like nothing she could’ve ever imagined; a ball of sunshine and pop culture references right next to a man known to be scuffed up and rough around the edges.  It was like this boy brought out a completely different side of Stark.

“I love you too,” Peter replied softly before leaning up on the balls of his feet to give Tony a soft kiss on the lips.

Jenna, sucked in a breath of air harshly, the sound being enough to alert the men to her presence.  The two men stared at her with wide eyes for a moment and she stared right back.

“Shit.” Tony broke the silence of the room, his voice conveying the concern written across his face.  Peter put a hand on his forearm and schooled his features into a comforting look.  The man looked over at him and tried to take solace in his lover’s gentleness.

“I told you something was gonna go wrong,” the billionaire said with a mix of concern and fear on his face.

“We’re not getting into this argument again,” Peter responded decidedly, his tone making it sound final.

“I- I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize I was walking in on anything. I just came in because I forgot my jacket! I . . . please don’t fire me, Mister Stark,” Jenna stammered once she had broken out of her shocked stupor.

“He’s not going to fire you,” Peter reassured her with a kind tone.

“Well . . .” Tony said, but his tone was a bit humorous.

“You’re not gonna fire her because we decided we couldn’t wait until we got back to the penthouse to be all sappy.” Peter gave the man a stern look and it occurred to Jenna once again that this soft, delicate-appearing brunet clad in pastels had somehow reined in the man who had spent so many years being known as a playboy.

“I’m not going to fire you, but you can’t tell anybody, not even anyone within the company. If you do, my legal team can and will sue you for all you’re worth. Understood?” Tony had a dangerous edge to his voice, letting the girl know that he was completely serious. There was no way that this was an empty threat.

“Understood,” Jenna replied with a curt nod. “But I just have one question.”

“Shoot,” Peter told her.

“How old are you? Because . . . well, you look pretty young.”

Tony started laughing and Peter gave him an annoyed look.

“Stop laughing! You do this every time!” Peter exclaimed, lightly slapping his arm.

“Everybody thinks you’re, like, sixteen! You look barely old enough to have your license!” Tony shot back, his laughter dying down.

“I’m twenty-one,” he told Jenna. “I’m not underage, if you were wondering. Tony may be a bit of a mad scientist, but he doesn’t date people who are underage.”

“Okay, good. I was just worried for a second. Um, thank you for not firing me and I swear I won’t tell anybody. I should get going,” she rushed out with a relieved smile.  Without another word, she made her way out of the auditorium, holding her jacket close to her chest.

When she got back to her floor, Dylan and Ashley bombarded her with questions about what took her so long, but she just told them that it took her a second to find it.  Of course, they weren’t satisfied with that answer, but Jenna didn’t let anything slip.

That was the third time Stark Industries employees saw Peter.

4.

When Jenna walked into work the next morning, early as always, she found an envelope sitting on her designated area of her group desk, which separated into four sections for her project team to sit at. Across the front, it had her first name written out in a neat, cursive scrawl. She furrowed her brows as she looked at it, questions racing through her mind as she wondered who it could’ve been from.

Without another thought, she ripped it open and pulled out the contents. She unfolded the paper that was inside only to find a letter written in the same handwriting.

Dear Jenna,

I wanted to write you a letter, but realized that I never caught your name yesterday. I hope you don’t mind, but I asked FRIDAY who you were. Thinking back on it, that definitely makes me sound like a creep, so I apologize.

I wanted to thank you for not completely flipping out on Tony and I in the auditorium yesterday. I know that the whole thing was definitely crazy and it would’ve made sense if you freaked out. I also wanted to thank you for not immediately telling anybody. Seeing as no news stories have come out and nobody in the building has confronted Tony, I’m assuming you didn’t leak it, which is relieving.

I hope you’re doing well and if you need literally anything, just drop off a letter in the company mailroom in box 106.

As a thank you, there’s a Starbucks gift card also in the envelope! I wasn’t sure if you liked coffee, but seeing as you work in R&D and most of the employees in that department survive off coffee, I’m going to assume you do. Enjoy!

I’ll (hopefully) talk to you soon!

-Peter

P.S. Tony might not say it, but he’s also grateful that you haven’t leaked anything! I can promise that you’re good in his books :)

“What’s that?” Ashley asked, sneaking up behind Jenna and startling the woman.

“It’s nothing,” Jenna replied quickly while shoving the letter back into the envelope and cramming it into her bag. Ashley gave her a suspicious look but let it go, sitting down at her area of the group desk that was beside Jenna’s.

“I have a prediction!” Dylan announced as he entered the almost empty floor and waltzed over to Jenna and Ashley. He collapsed onto his stool and dumped his bag onto the floor beside him.

“This should be good,” Ashley muttered sarcastically, crossing her arms.

Jenna just looked away.

“So, we’ve established that it’s strange that nobody has ever heard of Peter and how, out of nowhere, he shows up!”

“Yeah, that’s kinda why we all think it’s weird,” Jenna shot at him, hoping that it covered up her panic.

“It’s also odd that he’s got a bit of a resemblance to Stark,” Dylan continued, decidedly ignoring her.

“I don’t see it,” Jenna interrupted once more, but the man didn’t stop.

“Maybe, just maybe, Peter is Stark’s son who he didn’t want in the spotlight until he was old enough to handle it!”

Ashley gasped while Jenna glanced away from them with a look of both panic and amusement. 

“Or Peter is Stark’s illegitimate child and he doesn’t want to have a scandal!” Ashley built on the theory with an excited smile and wide eyes.

“What do you think, Jenna?” Dylan asked, and both of Jenna’s teammates had their eyes on her.

“I think you two are full of bullshit,” Jenna told them, trying hard to keep her voice steady. “He’s probably just Stark’s intern. Maybe he’s a super genius or something.”

“Bor-ring!” Ashley replied with a roll of her eyes.

“Yeah, our theory is way better,” Dylan bragged, a bit of humor in his tone.

Jenna stayed oddly quiet for the rest of the morning.

+++

When lunch rolled around, Dylan and Ashley went off to the food court floor of the building, but Jenna decided that she wanted to make use of the Starbucks gift card she’d been given. When she opened the envelope back up to get it, she discovered that it was a two-hundred dollar gift card, which left her in shock for a few moments. Still, she shook herself out of it and went to go get a sandwich and a coffee.

After lunch, she found herself back with her teammates, working on their project, but sipping on a venti white chocolate mocha this time around. Around half an hour after they’d come back from lunch, the elevator doors opened to reveal Peter, wearing a sunny yellow sweater that matched the smile on his face. He walked out of the elevator and seemingly ignored all the eyes on him. He made his way over to a table working on prosthetics and began to help them out, the team there looking a bit surprised but extremely grateful for the assistance.

When Peter looked up and spotted Jenna, he gave her an even brighter smile, which she returned. She shook the coffee cup in her hand a little, bringing his attention to it, and he gave a silent chuckle. Jenna took a sip of her mocha and turned back to her project.

“What the fuck was that?” Ashley asked, drawing both of her teammates away from where they were designing arm prosthetics.

“What?” Dylan and Jenna replied in unison.

“That little interaction you just had with Peter,” the blonde woman elaborated, looking at Jenna accusingly.

“What interaction?” the man piped up before the brunette could respond.

“She and Peter made eye contact and smiled at each other and then Jenna held up her coffee cup and Peter chuckled!”

Dylan gave Ashley an incredulous look before shifting his gaze to Jenna.

“It was nothing,” Jenna defended with a level voice before getting back to work.

“Does this have something to do with the letter from this morning?”

“What letter?” Jenna and Dylan asked in unison.

Ashley sighed. “Jenna, come on, just tell me what’s going on? Is there something you know that we don’t?”

Before the brunette could even respond, Peter passed by their table.

“Hey, Jenna!” the young man greeted cheerily.

“Hey, Peter,” she responded, a smile on her face.

When he was gone, she went right back to her work, ignoring the looks from her teammates.

Jenna knew it was going to be a long rest of her day.

That was the fourth time Stark Industries employees saw Peter.

5.

By the next Friday, the questions from Dylan and Ashley had died down, but the suspicious glances were definitively not stopping, nor becoming anymore secretive. Luckily, though, Jenna was becoming better and better at ignoring the looks from her coworkers.

There were no more appearances from Peter, but Jenna had been enjoying exchanging letters with the brunet. The letters would sometimes be accompanied by pictures, mostly of Peter and Tony, and the woman had fun printing dumb pictures of her own and sending them back. The two would share funny stories and talk about themselves, though Peter still never shared his last name, but the brunette didn’t blame him for that; she knew he wanted to continue to keep himself on the down low. Tony would sometimes put in a few sentences on a letter, mostly a short quip about something his boyfriend wrote, and Jenna couldn’t help but find her boss’s dry wit rather humorous.

As the weekend approached once more, Jenna found herself feeling glad to get away from her teammates’ conspicuous looks and probing questions. When it reached midday, she was beyond happy to escape to the food court, rushing in order to get ahead of Ashley and Dylan. 

When she walked into the food court, she knew there was something going on. The chatter of the floor was quieter than normal, despite the normal amount of people being there. It was less conversation and more pointed whispers. When she followed where everybody’s eyes were looking, she discovered Peter sitting at one of the round tables on his own.

The young man had a couple slices of pizza on a plate in front of him, with one slice in his hand. He had wireless earbuds in and his phone was propped up using a pop socket attached to the back. It was obvious that he was watching some show or another.

Jenna simply shrugged and went to grab her own food, paying no mind to the whispered gossip spreading across the floor. She got a container of Chinese food from one of the stations and looked around to find a place to sit before realizing that she didn’t know where to go. She usually sat with her teammates, but she had been trying to escape them until she had to get back to work, which left her with nobody to eat lunch with.

In a strange and unusual burst of confidence, Jenna walked across the floor and toward Peter’s table, decidedly brushing off the eyes that followed her. She put her food down and sat in the chair across from her boss’s boyfriend, attempting to act casual as the quiet chatter toned down in order to hear what happened next.

Peter looked up when she sat down, seemingly confused that somebody was joining him at his table. When he saw that it was Jenna, however, he cracked a bright smile. He took out his earbuds and put them back into the carrying case before shutting off his phone and setting it face down on the table.

“Hey, Jenna!” His tone was bubbly, an air of familiarity to it. Just hearing him talk made Jenna feel calmer; the boy had a way of doing that.

“Hey, Peter,” she greeted back, less excitedly but still conveying that she was happy to see him again. “What’s up?”

“Not much! Tony’s in a meeting and I decided to come down here for lunch. I didn’t like how quiet it was.”

“I think you mentioned that once. That you don’t like being alone in spaces, I mean.” Jenna paid attention to every word in every letter she received from the young man. She felt like she connected to him in a way that she’d never connected to anybody before; it wasn’t like any friendship she had in the past.

“Yeah. It just feels nice to know that the world is still turning and I’m not completely alone.” He looked sad for a moment, eyes glazed over and distant. It was a somber kind of happiness, a mix of emotions that weren’t supposed to be mixed in case of an explosion, but not a loud one; it was more of a combustion, internal and quiet, soft and powerful. “But, anyways, what’ve you been up to?”

“Not much,” Jenna replied, trying to move on from the delicate moment. “Been working on the prototype for the prosthetics and I think it’s going well. There’s a few bits and pieces that me and my teammates have gotta work out before we send the design to our lab director, but I think we’ll get there soon.”

“That’s really cool! I honestly can’t wait for the prosthetics line to go into production! I think it's really gonna change the game since it’s gonna be a high tech line but also more affordable than the competitors!” Peter’s eyes were shining, the gleam replacing the far off look from only moments earlier.

“I’m excited for it too!” Jenna admitted. “I know it’s gonna help so many people and I can’t wait for it to go on the market!”

Peter opened his mouth to respond, but his phone buzzed before he could speak. He picked it up and read the notification, giving a small chuckle and typing out a response before looking up at Jenna.

“Was that . . .?” Jenna trailed off, unsure of how to finish the sentence but sure that the brunet caught her drift.

“Yeah,” Peter responded easily with a fond, but exasperated, look. “He finished his meeting and asked if I saved him some food from my lunch. I did, but I’m tempted to eat it myself and tell him to go get his own food.”

Jenna snorted.

“I’m not that mean, though, so I’m gonna take him the last two slices.” He slid his phone into his back pocket and his earbuds case into his front one before standing up and grabbing the plate with the two slices of pizza.

“I’ll see you later, Jenna!” he called as he walked away, heading towards the private elevator.

“See you, Peter!” With that, the woman went back to eating her lunch, as if nothing had happened at all.

When two people sat down at the table, Jenna looked up at them, only to find her two teammates, who had bewildered and suspicious looks on their faces. Dylan’s brow was furrowed and Ashley’s eyes were narrowed, the blonde obviously more dubious than him.

“What the actual fuck, Jenna?” she asked, voicing everybody’s thoughts.

“What?” the brunette replied as if she didn’t know.

“Don’t act all innocent! How are you so friendly with him?! This shit doesn’t add up!” Dylan nodded along to Ashley’s words. 

Jenna gave an exasperated sigh.

“Sorry, but that’s confidential information. NDA’s and all that, ya know?” She was trying everything she could to weasel her way out of it, but it was the first time she’d given her teammates a semi-straight answer, even if it wasn’t that revealing.

“Oh, come on, Jenna!” Dylan finally spoke up. “It can’t be anything that serious! Just tell us what’s going on?”

“I’m afraid that Ms. Locke is right, Mr. Hoffman. This is confidential information that Ms. Locke does not have the authority nor the necessity to reveal to you,” FRIDAY interrupted, garnering the attention of the people watching.

Jenna only shrugged under the intense gazes of her coworkers, but it still shut them up about it.

That was the fifth time Stark Industries employees saw Peter.

+1

It was relatively quiet for the next few weeks after the food court incident. While the suspicious glances remained, the questions had died down, though whispers still followed Jenna around as her coworkers spread rumors about how she knew Peter.

Speaking of the brunet, he hadn’t shown up since the incident, but he and Jenna had continued to exchange letters, becoming closer friends as time went on. The next time news about Peter came, it was only news for Jenna, as nobody else had any clue of how the young man was involved.

It had happened when Tony Stark had come to the R&D floor to talk to the employees there about the progress on the prosthetics line. Everybody had been trying extra hard to look busy as the man went around, all of them hoping to seem like they were valuable employees who actually did work.

Jenna’s team was the last that the billionaire came to, but as soon as he started talking to them, the brunette noticed something.

He had an engagement ring on.

The woman mentioned nothing, though she did freeze for a moment when she noticed it. Still, she pushed through and continued with the discussion about the progress they had been making.

When her boss later stepped away to answer a text, she quickly told her coworkers she had to use the restroom, rushing away and going down the hallway that Tony had gone down, which happened to lead to the bathrooms.

When she got there, she found him smiling down at his phone and typing quickly.

“Did you guys get . . .?” Jenna started, but trailed off at the end, startling the man a bit. He looked up at her, eyes a bit wide, but immediately recognized her. He looked confused at the question for a moment before realizing that her eyes were on his ring.

“Yeah, we did,” Tony answered, looking a bit sheepish as a blush painted his cheeks.

“How did it happen?” It was obvious that the girl was excited to find out.

“It’s actually pretty funny. I got down on one knee to propose and he looked so exasperated and I freaked out because I thought he was gonna break up with me or something. Instead, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a ring box. He was planning on proposing that night too.”

“That’s absolutely incredible!” Jenna told him excitedly, but still kept her voice quiet.

“When we told our friends, they all looked so unsurprised that something like that would happen for him and I.”

The two both laughed before the billionaire’s phone buzzed again.

“I’ve got a meeting in, like, five minutes, so I should probably go.”

The two said their goodbyes and he started to walk back out to the main area to head to the private elevator, but stopped and turned around before he could.

“Just do you know, you’re invited to the wedding.”

Without another word, he walked away, leaving Jenna standing there in shock. A million thoughts were racing through her head and her eyes were still trained on the end of the hallway where the man had disappeared from.

“I’m invited to the wedding,” she whispered to herself. Taking a moment, she shook herself out of it and began walking back to her team’s table to get back to work.

Before she could get there, though, Ashley rushed at her and grabbed her arm, pulling her back the way she came. The blonde pulled her into the women’s restroom and checked every stall to make sure they were empty before turning back to her coworker.

“What the fuck it this?!” She held up a letter and  Jenna immediately knew who it was from. She snatched it from her co worker's hand and skimmed through it, praying to Thor that it wasn’t one of the letters that explicitly mentioned Peter dating Tony. She then proceeded to thank Thor when she realized that it was one one of the notes that mentioned a relationship, but not outright who it was with.

“Okay, Peter and I have been talking through letters. So what?” she replied, attempting to keep her voice steady so it sounded like she wasn’t fazed by the whole thing.

“Are you fucking with me?! You’re friends with this mysterious dude who’s all buddy-buddy with Tony fucking Stark and you’re expecting me to just let that go?! You’re out of your mind!” Ashley was obviously worked up about the whole thing and the brunette didn’t know what to say, but, luckily, her coworker started talking again before she could get a word out.

“You’ve been so secretive these past couple months and it’s been annoying as all hell! You’re not telling me anything and it feels like I’m so disconnected from you! Just tell me what’s going on!”

“I can’t! I can’t tell you what’s going on! I’m sorry that I don’t wanna lose my fucking job just so you can know every aspect of my life! Just let it go and leave me and my letters alone!” Jenna blew up, which was something she didn’t do very often.

Unsurprisingly, Ashley looked taken aback, shock written across her face. Jenna immediately regretted it.

“I’m sorry,” she told her friend softly. “I just can’t tell you.”

Jenna turned around and left the bathroom, the letter in her grasp. As soon as she was out, she went to her lab director and asked if she could leave a little early, giving the excuse of feeling sick. Of course, her lab director was understanding as always and let her go. She quickly gathered her stuff, ignoring the looks from Ashley and Dylan, and hightailed it out of there.

+++

“Dylan!” the R&D lab director, Kelsey, called from her office.

The man shot up from his team’s table, where the silence was as dense as molasses and the tension was so thick that you could cut it with a knife.

“Yes?” Dylan asked as he made his way over and placed himself in the open doorway. The director stood up and handed him a couple files.

“I have to go to a meeting, but these files need to be turned in. Could you take them up to the boss’s office for me?”

“You- you want me to take these to Mr. Stark?” His voice was a bit shaky.

“It’s not that big of a deal. You go to floor 89, you find the office with his name on it, you knock on the door, you tell him that I sent you, you give him the files, and you leave. I promise it’s not as stressful as you think it is.” Kelsey’s tone was comforting, but it did little to ease his anxieties.

“Okay,” he muttered, turning around and heading towards the elevator.

When the doors opened and Dylan stepped in, he found himself alone in the elevator. The silence was filled up by his anxious thoughts about what could go wrong. He spent the entire ride up trying to take deep breaths and remember that it was a simple job; just go in, give him the files, and leave.

The elevator stopped and he stepped off onto the eerily quiet office floor. It seemed that nobody was there and it freaked him out; it felt like a horror movie. He crept along the halls until he made it to a door with his boss’s name on it. He raised his hand to knock until he heard voices coming from inside.

“I don’t get why it’s such a big deal.” That was Tony Stark’s voice, and Dylan recognized it immediately.

“It just is!” A voice replied. It took Dylan all of three seconds to realize that it was the mysterious Peter who seemed to show up at the most random of times.

Against his better judgment, Dylan peered through the semi-open blinds that covered the windows of the office. When he did so, he found Peter sitting on the edge of the desk and Tony a couple feet in front of him.

“It doesn’t seem like that hard of a decision. If you don’t like this guy, don’t invite him to the wedding! It’s so simple!” The billionaire looked confused at the dilemma at hand, though Dylan had no clue what they were talking about. He was getting married?

“But it’s not! I don’t want to invite him, but it would be rude if I didn’t!” Peter looked worked up about the whole thing, face slightly flushed and fiddling with his hands.

“It might be rude, but if you don’t want him there, then don’t invite him!”

“It’s not that simple.”

“Except that it is.”

“Maybe for you!” It wasn’t a yell, but it wasn’t quiet. Peter had stopped fiddling with his fingers and was now pulling slightly at his hair.

“What do you mean?” Tony spoke like he could accidentally shatter the young man in front of him if he wasn’t careful.

“I mean that you’re Tony Stark. You’re a famous billionaire that can do whatever you want. If you don’t want to invite somebody, you don’t invite them. You don’t care if it’s rude because you’re Tony fucking Stark and you can do anything you’d like. I’m not like that, I can’t just do whatever I want. I’m Peter Parker, an average guy from Queens, and I’ve always been just that. If I’m rude, there’s consequences and it can actually affect my life. I have to think things like this over, even if you see it as trivial.”

Tony paused for a moment, letting the words sink in.

“Except you’re not just some average guy. You’re Peter fucking Parker. You’re incredible. You’re gonna change the entire world. Maybe I don’t get these kinds of things because I was raised in such a different world than you, but all I want is for you to be happy. Whatever choice you make here, I’ll be fine with, but that isn’t what I care about. I care about you, because you’re the most amazing person on this planet. You’re Peter Parker, the man I fell in love with.”

Dylan’s jaw dropped as he finally found the closure he’d been seeking for months. He knew what Peter’s last name was, he knew what relationship he had to Tony Stark, he knew who Peter was. He had never expected this, though. He cringed as his mind went back to that theory he had about Peter being Tony’s son.

He watched as the two shared a short kiss and finally moved back in front of the door, feeling the need to give his boss the files, run back down to his floor, and tell his teammates everything.

Dylan knocked on the door and he could almost feel the two men inside freeze in shock. It only took a second before the door opened, though, and revealed Peter Parker standing there with Tony Stark slightly behind him, both of them looking worried.

“Uh, I’m from R&D and my lab director, Kelsey, asked me to deliver these files,” Dylan stuttered out, failing at his attempt to remain casual.

“Oh, uh, yeah, yeah, thanks,” Peter replied, seemingly relieved as he took the files.

“I, um, bye, I guess,” Dylan stammered before turning around and booking it out of there. He could feel the two men’s eyes on him as he left.

When Dylan got to the elevator, he pressed on the button a few times, praying for it to arrive faster, and jumped on the moment the doors had opened wide enough to get through. He then adamantly pressed the button for the R&D floor. The elevator ride down felt much longer than the one up.

When Dylan did get to his floor, he raced through the doors and to his teammates, grabbing each of them by the upper arm and dragging them into the men’s restroom. He checked every stall to make sure they were alone before locking the bathroom door and turning back to his teammates.

“You guys aren’t gonna believe this!” Dylan announced. “I found out some crazy shit!”

“Why am I here?” Jenna asked him in a deadpan voice. “Can I leave?”

“Jenna, you’ll actually wanna hear this! I found out who Peter is!”

Ashley and Jenna both froze, but for different reasons.

“You gotta tell us!” Ashley exclaimed excitedly.

“No, you better fucking not!” Jenna said over her.

“What?! Why?!” Dylan looked genuinely confused.

“Because we’re not supposed to know! It’s obvious he wants to keep his identity a secret! You can’t go around telling people! You need to tell him and Stark that you know so they can feel sure that his identity won’t get leaked!”

“God, you’re such a buzzkill, Jenna,” Ashley shot at her.

“No, I’m a good person.”

It made her teammates go silent, the words piercing through them like knives.

“If you wanna go and tell and lose your job, then go ahead, but I want no part of it.” Jenna turned around and started to leave.

“Do you know?” Dylan asked her, making the woman stop in her tracks.

“What?” Jenna slowly turned back to him.

“Do you know?” he repeated, voice cold and serious.

Jenna stayed silent for a few moments, mulling over what she could say.

“Not on purpose . . .”

“And you didn’t tell us?” Ashley questioned, betrayal written across her face.

“Sorry I respect their privacy!” It was obvious that she was very much not sorry.

“Wait . . . did you find out when you went back to get your jacket after the presentation?!” Dylan exclaimed, looking like he had put all the puzzle pieces together. When Jenna stayed quiet, he knew that he had gotten his answer. “Holy shit! What happened?! Did you, like, see them kiss or some shit?!”

“Kiss?!” Ashley shouted.

“Jesus Christ,” Jenna muttered, putting her head in her hands.

“No fucking way! They’re in a relationship?!”

“Yeah!”

“That’s it,” Jenna declared decisively and turned around.

“Where are you going?” Ashley asked her, bewilderment shining in her eyes.

“I’m going to go tell them that Dylan figured it out and that you know,” Jenna told the blonde, voice laced with venom.

Jenna unlocked the door and left, not letting her teammates get another word in, but the two followed her out and watched as she stormed past all her coworkers and to the elevator, disappearing as soon as the doors opened.

“I might lose my job,” Dylan muttered, eyes wide and trained on the now closed elevator doors.

“Is it true?” one of the other employees, Amelia, asked as she walked up to Dylan and Ashley.

“Is what true?” Ashley replied.

“That Peter and Stark are in a relationship? You guys were implying it in there, and you aren’t exactly good at being quiet.”

“I’m definitely gonna lose my job,” Dylan whispered, correcting his earlier statement.

“So it is true!” Eric, another employee, shouted.

Everybody started talking, the floor turning into a storm of chattering.

“We’re so fucked. We’re absolutely, completely, utterly fucked,” Ashley murmured, only loud enough so Dylan could hear, and the man only nodded in agreement.

The two slowly walked forwards, looking around at their gossiping coworkers as they made their way back to their desk. They looked completely horrified, and guilt was quickly eating away at Dylan.

Before they could sit down, the elevator doors opened and Jenna walked out with Tony and Peter in tow. Everybody stopped, staring at the three of them. Peter looked nervous and tears were glistening in his eyes, but Tony just looked furious, his expression mirroring Jenna’s.

“Okay, which of you knows?” Tony asked the room, his voice deadly calm. He didn’t yell or scream, but that steady tone was almost worse than him blowing up at them.

One employee raised their hand, and everybody else followed, the last people to put their hands up being Ashley and Dylan.

“All of you, go to the auditorium. Now. All the other employees will meet you there. Do not say a word of this to them before I get there to talk to them about it. Do I make myself clear?” 

If looks could kill, all of the R&D employees, minus Jenna, would be dead. All of them mumbled their confirmations or nodded and slowly shuffled off to the elevators, heading to the auditorium floor.

Ashley and Dylan had fallen into the back of the crowd and were the last to get onto an elevator, meaning they could see the floor before the door closed. The two watched as Tony turned back to Peter and Jenna, who were looking regretful and heartbroken respectfully. The last thing they saw before the elevator started moving was Peter beginning to cry and burying his face in Tony’s shoulder as the man embraced him and Jenna putting a comforting hand on his back.

By the time the R&D employees reached the auditorium and began to make their way into the seats, other employees were either already there or just getting there. There was chatter, a mix of people confused why they had been called there and those who knew praying that they wouldn’t be fired. The chatter seemed to die down a bit as everybody was seated, all of them waiting in anticipation for whatever was going to happen.

After a few minutes, the doors of one of the entrances to the auditorium, which had been closed, slammed open. Everybody turned, though plenty of them couldn’t see the doors, and watched as Tony Stark stormed down the aisle towards the stage, Jenna Locke behind him and looking slightly less, but still plenty, furious. The two made their way up the three stairs that led up to the stage.

All the employees gazed up at the two standing center stage, and they were glaring back at them with serious faces. After a moment of silence, Tony finally spoke.

“I’m sure the majority of you are wondering why I called everybody to the auditorium. Today, somebody found out something that they shouldn’t have about my private life and, instead of coming and talking to me about it in order to keep it confidential, they went and told somebody, and those people’s department overheard. That person who found out and told will be fired and the person who was first told and was complicit in revealing information about my life will be put on probation.”

In the back of the auditorium, Dylan and Ashley sank down in their seats.

“You may also be wondering why I have one of your coworkers up here with me today. If you weren’t already aware, this is Jenna Locke.”

Jenna gave the audience a curt nod.

“Jenna also found out about this information a couple months ago. Instead of telling anybody, she talked to us and promised to keep it to herself, and she has kept that promise. She was also the one who told me about the information leak.”

The employees, minus the R&D department, were on the edge of their seats, eager to find out the information but scared of their boss and what he could do to them if things got out.

“Seeing as nothing can seem to stay a secret here, I have elected to talk to you all about it. Keep in mind that what happened in terms of this information being revealed was a serious breach of confidentiality and disrespected not just my own privacy. Take this as a warning. If any of you are to tell anybody outside of this company about this, your employment will be terminated and my legal team will sue you to kingdom come. This is not a three strikes you’re out situation. Do not tell a soul about this. Keep in mind the fact that you all signed non-disclosure agreements when you took this job. This counts as a company secret, and you will treat it as one.”

Everybody seemed to nod or give a murmur of confirmation. It wasn’t much, but it appeared to satisfy the man.

“Moving on, I’m sure you’ve all either seen or heard about Peter. Only a select few of you know who he is, though without his consent, and others have seen us interact but never known who we are to each other. This information about our private lives was discovered and we have no choice but to let you all know in fear of rumors and gossip being spread around and taken outside the company. Everybody, please meet my fiancé, Peter Parker.”

The room was shocked into silence, the only sound being the clacking of Peter’s shoes as he softly walked out from the wings and to Tony’s side. None of the employees uttered even a sound as they looked up at the boy, whose eyes were still slightly red and puffy from when he had cried only ten minutes earlier.

“Hey, everybody. I’m Peter. You’ve all probably seen me around,” the young man introduced himself, voice only loud enough to hear. “Like Tony said, we weren’t planning on telling people yet, but we don’t get that choice anymore.”

They were still silent.

“Since this will be your only chance to do so, we’ll be answering questions about this,” Peter continued. Nobody spoke, until one person in the third row raised their hand and the young man motioned to them. “Yes, go ahead.”

“How, uh, how old are you?” the woman asked quietly, looking slightly concerned.

Peter sighed as Tony looked to him with a humorous smile.

“Don’t you fucking dare,” he told the billionaire, who didn’t have a chance to respond before Jenna started laughing a bit. “You too?! I can’t believe you would betray me like this! This happens every fucking time!”

The employee who asked furrowed her eyebrows, seemingly mirroring the confusion of the rest of the audience.

“I’m twenty-one,” Peter told her. “Tony likes to make fun of me because I look like I’m not old enough to drive. Jenna’s laughing because she asked the same question when she found out.”

The woman nodded along with the explanation and everybody went silent again before another person raised their hand and Peter pointed to them.

+++

Eight Months Later

“And this is your team!” Kelsey told the new employees excitedly. “Meet Jenna and Ashley! They’ve been here for a while and are definitely excited to show you the ropes!”

“It’s nice to meet you!” Jenna greeted. “What’s your name?”

“I’m River,” the new guy replied quietly, cheeks flushed.

“I’m glad to have you on the team, River!” Ashley exclaimed.

“I’ll leave you all to it!” Kelsey gave River one last smile and walked off to talk to some teams about their projects.

“We’re finishing up some last touches on the update to the prosthetics line,” Jenna explained to the new recruit as he sat down. He nodded along as she began to explain the project.

Jenna was cut off by the elevator doors opening and Peter walking onto the floor.

“Excuse me for a second,” the woman told her team before jumping up and running over to the brunet.

“Who’s that?” River asked Ashely as he watched Jenna excitedly embrace the man and begin to talk to him.

“Have you signed all your NDAs?”

River nodded.

“Peter!” Ashely called. “Come meet the new kid!”

Peter bounded over eagerly, a large smile on his face as he approached the two employees, Jenna trailing him.

“Uh, hi, I’m River.”

“Nice to meet you, River! I’m Peter Parker. It’s always great to see new faces around here!”

“It’s great to be here,” he replied awkwardly.

Peter nodded and was off again, going around to teams and helping with projects, but, more importantly, just talking to the employees in general.

“Is he a director or something? Everybody seems to know him,” River questioned his team.

“He’s even better than a director,” Ashley told him with a grin. “He’s Tony’s Stark’s fiancé.”

Shock painted itself across River’s face.

“There’s no way that’s real!”

Ashley and Jenna glanced at each other before turning back to River. They didn’t say anything else to him, which was unnerving to the new employee.

As if on cue, the elevator doors opened once more and the Tony Stark walked out, a small smile adorning his face. Peter worked up from where he was helping a team and flitted over to the man happily. The two shared a short kiss before Peter turned back a bit.

“We still on for lunch on Friday, Jenna?”

“Of course!”

Peter shot her a smile and the couple entered the elevator, talking quietly as they disappeared behind the metal doors.

“Okay, so maybe it is real.”

Tag List (Let me know if you would like to be added or removed):

@darkerstarker @dim-ships-johnlock @haylove5

#axiwrites #starker #starker fanfic #tony stark/peter parker #starker fluff #starker fanfiction #theres a little hint of angst but its barely there #this was an excuse to write cute scenes #anyways i hope yall like it

[blouisparadise]

Here are some amazing bottom Louis fics that were posted or completed during the month of April. We really hope you enjoy this list. Happy reading!

1) Heat | Explicit | 1433 words

In which Louis and Harry mate with each other.

2) A Desperate Time | Explicit | 2,52 words

Aka Harry and Louis have a pee kink that leads to Louis pissing in Harry's lap. Graphic, kinky smut. Read at your own desire.

3) Bohemian Rhapsody Is Not A Documentary (But Freddieismyqueen) | Explicit | 3933 words

Note: There’s a BH mention.

A day in life of Harry Styles and his smol sunflower [quarantine edition]

Aka how many wonderful adjectives can be applied to Louis Tomlinson and his everything?

4) Just A Bit Of Work | Explicit | 4027 words

In which Marcel is a virgin, and becomes his office's amorous co-worker's next big conquest.

5) I Don't Wanna Look At Anything Else That I Saw You | Mature | 4375 words

After the hiatus of One Direction, all 5 members have their own solo careers. Louis, who just can't move on from Alex, his ex-boyfriend and bandmate, meets Harry, who's supposed to be Alex's doppelganger in his new single's music video.

6) Like Lovers In A Movie | Explicit | 4565 words

A grumpy Louis and a movie night don't mix. Harry's still able to fix it.

7) Christmas Lights In Paris | Mature | 4671 words

In which Harry makes a big mistake and has to get Louis back, while Louis' a cute, soft baker.

8) Wasting My Time | Explicit | 7856 words

Harry is in love with Louis. He can't do anything about it, until he can.

Louis is in love with Harry. He doesn't have a chance, until he does.

9) The Promotion. | Explicit | 8143 words

After being promoted, Harry is challenged to prove he is one of the guys. Whatever it is he had in mind, he never thought he'd be expected to fuck an escort in front of his colleagues and boss during this corporate party.

10) Want You To Want Me | Explicit | 8836 words

Harry likes Louis, Louis likes Harry. But it's not that simple. Louis doesn't know if he can handle Harry's lifestyle and feels overwhelmed. Can Harry convince him he's worth it?

11) Don't Hold Back Now | Mature | 11103 words

Harry gives Louis everything he asks for except for the one thing he wants the most. If only Louis knew who Harry truly was.

Or the demon Harry AU.

12) We Will Get Through This | Mature | 11219 words

Because of quarantine, Louis has to stay home with his roommate, Harry, who he's never really hung out with before. He's a sweet alpha who seems to really care and that annoys the hell out of Louis. But as he gets to know the alpha, he realizes it might not be dislike that he's feeling

13 Sunrise and Pixie Dust | Mature | 14816 words

Harry's taking a walk at sunrise in the forest he knows like the back of his hand when the wind starts blowing, the sky turns pink, and golden glitter starts to fall from the sky. He’s not sure about what’s happening, but when he comes face to face with a gorgeous winged-creature, he can’t help but be immediately mesmerized.

Or an AU in which Harry finds himself crossing the borders between two worlds.

14) Happier | Explicit | 15590 words

Literally based off of Ed Sheeran's song Happier.

15) My Heart Was Stolen, Can You Return It? | Explicit | 15824 words

Based on the prompt: "He's a cop. He’s the owner of a record store. A sudden rash of break-ins brings him to his store over and over and over again, until it becomes obvious that he might be tripping the alarm on purpose—just to see him. That’s illegal—but he's kind of falling for him, too."

I don't remember where I found this, maybe in a book I own or in a post I saw, but credit to whoever actually came up with it.

16) V | Explicit | 20275 words

Harry pays him to dance, Louis enjoys the sex on the side, and that’s all that ties them together. Whatever else the enigmatic man does is none of Louis’ fucking business.

Louis works at a club owned by infamous Harry Styles, leader of the largest criminal organization this side of the country. As they twirl closer together police and rival gangs start to gain the upper hand, forcing everyone's loyalty to be questioned.

17) I’m Having Your Baby (It's None of Your Business) | Mature | 26383 words

A bet can cost you a lot. Harry learns this in the weirdest of ways.

Louis just wanted a baby, and he got so much more.

18) Crush | Explicit | 26741words

Based off the song Crush by Mandy Moore.

19) My Love’s Not Simple (It’s Fragile) | Explicit | 27554 words

Harry's new job is threatened by his impending rut. Desperate for a solution, he allows Niall to introduce him to Louis, an omega whose heat begins the same day. They click.

20) Naked Attraction #2 | Mature | 29159 words

Louis Tomlinson is the first openly gay football player in the Premier football League. He was outed by the paps, but he’s had to embrace it since then. To show he doesn’t have shame in it, he goes onto Naked Attraction, and all the money will go to LGBTQ+ support, but he has made some changes to the show. Incidentally, he meets a certain Harry Styles there, and that is when things get interesting...

21) Compete Against The Stars | Mature | 30980 words

An ABO au where Louis finds out he's claimed to another Alpha. Angst ensues.

22) Where I Should Be | Explicit | 31324 words

Or, the affair AU where Harry is getting married, Louis is in love with his best friend, and they only have this life to get it right.

23) Will You Be My Boyfriend? | Explicit | 32484 words

Based on the prompt: "You’re at a party when you spot an ex. Quickly, you urgently pretend to be dating the nearest person, who happens to be very attractive."

24) Descendants of the Night | Explicit | 34371 words

Note: This fic is locked and can only be read by AO3 users.

Harry is one of the old world. His best friends Liam and Niall are too. Zayn is a transient. Harry is newly back to the country after years of living in the city and he doesn’t know where to turn when confronted with finding Niall near death after a brutal attack.

“Liam, it’s me...I’ve heard you and the others talk about where to get medical care, Niall is in dire need. Where do I take him?”

There is only doctor in their remote part on England that Liam knows of who can help someone like Niall.

Louis Tomlinson.

Liam fears for what might happen when one like Harry meets one like Louis.

25) The Sidelines | Explicit | 47078 words

Note: There are mentions of Top Louis.

Or Harry and Louis play hockey for Penn state and can't stand one another, since they can't keep their hatred off the ice their coach and team do what they can to keep their hard earned spot in the playoffs and their two star players from killing each other.

26) Forgive The Urgency, But Hurry Up And Wait | Explicit | 53701 words

Note: This is the sequel to this fic.

Louis' going to do better. He’s going to have all of the uncomfortable conversations and the relationship talks. He’s going to make himself be a good boyfriend.

And he’s got absolutely no idea where to start.

27) Things I Can't | Not Rated | 67495 words

Louis has a plan for his life. He’s going to be the first in his family to finish college. He’s going to be a doctor - the best damn doctor in the country. And he’s going to work his ass off to make sure his younger siblings never have to wonder whether they have the means to pursue their dreams.

He doesn’t have space in his plan for a relationship with an effortlessly alluring musician, and certainly not for the child that unexpectedly results from that union. Louis is at a crossroads he never thought to plan for, and now he must make a decision: between what he wants now, and what he wants most.

28) Join Me In The Afterlife | Explicit | 262289 words

Or, the one where Louis is a simple guy - all he wants from his summer break is to spend some quality time with his mother, get to know her new husband, and learn to play the guitar. Nothing out of the ordinary, that is for sure. However, life has a funny way of working and when Louis finds a strange boy sitting on his bed one sunny day, his summer break takes a turn for the better (or worse) when he discovers a ghost has stolen his heart from the get-go.

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

You can find other monthly roundup fic rec lists here.

#bottom louis #top harry #blp fic recs #monthly fic recs #fic recs #larry

[kyuus4ku]

Omg, can you analyze my big 3? If you don't want to you can ignore this lol

Mine is Sagittarius sun, Aquarius moon and Leo rising

hehe hiii and yes sure! can't ignore a sag ^_^

zodiac ask game

sagittarius sun

okay i did this earlier so i hope u don't mind me copy pasting/paraphrasing... bc i went feral with this one lmfao; sags are genuinely my top FAVOURITES. i could talk to you guys for hours because AJRKDS you're just so fun and witty. great listeners and very easy to get comfortable with! i wouldn't be afraid to say the weirdest shit with you guys because you're so chill AND I JUST LOVE YOUR SASS AND HUMOUR SO FUCKING MUCH like i'd let you guys roast me bc you do it well LMAO could say you're a little quick-tempered, which can make you a little blunt with your words? it's not that you do on purpose, but fire signs are usually on-the-go type, so you need to have an outlet somewhere maybe? it really depends on your patience, nevertheless you are extremely bright, and ik sags were and always are capable of making me see the bright side of things, even if they're not very motivated themselves. are you addicted to things you're familiar with because the idea of change kinda scares you? uncertainty and the lack of clarity could just send you into a spiral sometimes, right? you're not set in your ways, you just feel like sometimes there are so many paths to choose from, and choosing just one path seems so fucking overwhelming. at least that's my experience with sag suns. nevertheless, you guys are understanding, and even if you don't understand someone's state of mind (due to how curious you are, you will eventually), you won't judge them for it. i see u have a fire sign (leo) as your rising too... could i say that whenever intense emotions come into perspective, you kind of lose control and it impacts your self-confidence?

aquarius moon

i did this earlier too! but i'll personalise it a little so it's a more relevant to your respective chart: i suppose this part of your chart accounts the part of you which likes to be alone? aquarius moons thrive in isolation, but not in a bad way. they like to do things on their own, and i could say you feel pretty detached from everything and everyone at times, correct? that's probably because you're used to be a loner, and people may point out how distant you actually are, maybe without you even being aware of it. you could say you're emotionally detached? and that makes it hard for you to bind close relationships. nevertheless, you are really good at communication. aqua placements generally treasure communication, and again, i'm guessing you're great at listening due to this. people find your serene nature to be so comforting, making you one of the most calming placements to be around. the aquas i know are extremely understanding, and not in the least judgmental. an ideal type of conversationalist, if you're around people you are comfortable with. now for you, i'm guessing it's hard to cope with how fierce your emotions can be sometimes since aquarius moons are more or less... detached and calm. pretty much versatile? fire signs (sag, leo, aries) are on-the-go, right, so perhaps you're torn between dealing with a problem slowly and wanting to get past it asap, which can lead to more stress and conflict. it really depends on whether or not you prefer to feel. nevertheless your sag sun really contributes to your social skills, and your aquarius moon just adds on to how reliable/caring you are.

leo rising

did this earlier too! but i will elaborate a bit more: all i can say is that: if you know what you want, not much can stop you from getting there (depending on how self-reliant you are). you have a pretty chill aura, but i suppose people would perceive you as enthralling if you're comfortable enough around them, especially if they give you the liberty to be yourself. people may view you as caring and supportive, and accuse you of having a heart of gold, which many people won't hesitate to take advantage of. it is nice to have a little attention directed your way, no? your sense of security varies with how people view you, so being praised is something you don't mind, but being insulted is something you can't take. leo placements are generally classified as leaders, but leo risings don't mind being lone wolves either, since overwhelming circumstances (crowded places, panicky situations) send them into a fit of agitation.

okay i can tell you're a friendly person? depending if you're comfortable with someone? literally all these placements make up one of the most friendliest, charismatic signs, but you aren't a pushover. i say that because one, leo placements have ego (good thing, not bad) and they don't really tolerate it when people try to step over them. can be defensive/protective too? sags don't tolerate bs either, and aquarius moons are reserved, but this kinda balances out everything. like you can be aggressive, but you can all be passive, depending on how well you can read a situation (you're a sag, i bet you're good at reading ppl's energy /gen) your aquarius moon hinders you from being too rash, your leo moon provides you with confidence and anything else which can offer self-defense, and your sag sun can help you adapt to people's energy. ngl your chart was one of the hardest to decipher i'm sorry if its not that accurate!!

#asks.txt #zodiac.asks #zen <3

[justjessame]

Starting Over Chapter 47

Bucky looked concerned as I approached the front door of Sarah’s house and I understood - I was pretty fucking worried too.  I HAD just heaved up everything that I’d been lucky enough to keep in my stomach AFTER tossing my cookies during the cookout the day before from one whiff of the full breakfast she’d thoughtfully invited us to.  Who wanted to witness a repeat of that?  Even if, by this point, I was empty enough to only be able to dry heave.  

Sarah held the door, having shoved Sam inside after telling him to get his act together.  I hoped he understood the warning to mean “don’t post the news about Bucky and Brooke to all your social media accounts” because I was pretty fucking sure that Connie followed his ass and - I felt cold and clammy by the mere thought of my best friend learning about my engagement AND possible pregnancy via a TWITTER post from SAM.  Shit.  

“Brooke?” Bucky’s breath was warm against my cheek, his voice quiet and laced with worry.  “You’re pale, sweetheart.”  

I managed an almost silent laugh.  “Just sending up a silent prayer that Cap there doesn’t decide to share our news before we get a chance to tell Connie ourselves,” glancing up at his face, I was gratified to see that he was losing a bit of color at the prospect too.  “You’re not looking so hardy yourself, Barnes.”  

“She’ll -” he swallowed so hard I was pretty damn sure that Sam could hear him before we crossed the threshold and got inside.  “I’ll make sure he doesn’t, Brooke,” I nodded, smiling as he kissed my temple.  “Even if I have to destroy his damn phone.”  For Sam’s sake, I hoped it wouldn’t come to that - but I won’t lie and say the idea of seeing Bucky’s strength in action didn’t give me a sharp twist of lust.  

The good news: I didn’t start heaving as soon as we walked in the house.  Actually the scent of the food no longer made me want to vomit up the entirety of everything I’d ever considered eating in my lifetime - before and after The Snap.  I wasn’t full on gorge hungry like I had been the day before either, so I almost felt normal.  ALMOST.  I was incredibly thirsty - for milk, juice, water - still hated the taste of coffee, so that hadn’t changed, but I couldn’t seem to get enough fluids in me.  

Sam watched me with a mixture of wide eyes and a smirk that had me on edge.  Bucky was watching him with a look that made me wonder how Sam wasn’t on edge.  And Sarah was spending breakfast watching all of us like we were ridiculous, but marginally entertaining.  

“Where is it?”  Bucky asked, when I got up to help Sarah clear the table - after waving his help off.  Sam looked at him like he’d lost his mind, but Buck just crossed his arms over his chest and stared at him with a clenched jaw.  

Sam leaned back in his own chair and stared back.  “Where’s what?”  

While they had their staring contest/face off, I offered to wash up since Sarah had fed us, but she would only consent to letting me help load the dishwasher.  Both of us were listening for the inevitable collusion, but nothing happened, silence continued.  

“That’s not normal, is it?”  She was asking me?  I shrugged.  She probably had as much experience with the two of them together as I did.  “Should we -”  

I nodded, “Bucky can move like shadows and smoke, for all we know he has Sam unconscious and his phone in pieces right now.”  Sarah looked like she might want a picture or video of that, and I was thinking that having siblings might be the weirdest fucking situation ever.  

We found them still sitting opposite one another, tense staring contest still on - “Well,” Sarah sighed, “I’m SO glad that the two of you are acting as role models for my sons,” she shook her head and reached for Sam’s phone, watching him flinch, but he didn’t blink.  “Think you wanted to see if my darling brother was about to share your news near and far WITHOUT permission -” she handed it to me, and I grinned at her.  

“Hey,” Sam broke first, glancing at me as if I had somehow broken HIS trust.  “I would NEVER -”  I raised an eyebrow and he shook his head.  “OK, I there MIGHT be a text in there that I STARTED to type, in ADVANCE, so when you GAVE me the OK to send it -”

I snorted and Bucky sat shaking his head, frown on his face and disappointment rolling off him in heavy waves.  “Trust, Sam,” he pulled me onto his lap and held me close as I sat Sam’s phone down on the table in front of us.  “Is a two-way street,” he picked up the phone with his left hand. I watched as Sam’s eyes went so wide I worried they might pop out.  

“Buck, don’t make any rash decisions,” Sam got up and started around the table.  “I can delete the message,” he held out his hand.  “It was rash -” Bucky wasn’t actually closing his hand at all, just holding the phone in his palm, but Sam and I both knew that it wouldn’t take much, a tiny bit of pressure and that phone was dust.  “Just give me my phone,” his tone went from pleading to something akin to his Captain America commanding one and I nearly let out another snort of humor.  

Bucky squinted up at him.  “A preemptive text,” tilting his head so he was leaning into me, he shook his head and kissed me at the same time.  “To who?”  He asked, when he met Sam’s gaze again.  “Who could you possibly think you should get to tell before WE get to tell them?”  

“Torres,” Sam offered, a name that I vaguely knew from Sam and Bucky’s conversations on our drive down from New York.  “Sharon.” A name I knew very well, given that she stayed in OUR house.  “Walker?”  The last one was met with silence and tension so thick that I was pretty fucking sure Sarah could have cut it with a butter knife.  

“You wanted to tell WALKER that Brooke and I are engaged and we -” I nudged him and he sighed.  “MIGHT be expecting an addition to our family.”  I sighed.  “Walker?”  The incredulousness dripped so heavily that I wondered if I could SEE it.  

“OK, maybe NOT Walker.”  Sam rolled his eyes.  “I’m excited for you two,” his grin grew.  “I mean, Bucky, man - look at you.”  

I bit my lip to hide my smile.  Yeah, LOOK at him.  At peace, engaged, possibly starting a family - That was pretty fucking fantastic.  

“Yeah, yeah,” Bucky’s voice had lost some of the irritation, ripped away by the truth of Sam’s words.  “You’re not off the hook, Sam.” He handed him the phone.  “Delete it, NOW.”  

We watched as Sam deleted the text - then sat around discussing what came next - meaning our return to New York and two doctors’ appointments for me.  One to confirm whether or not I had a tiny supersoldier growing inside of me - and one to meet Dr. Stephen Strange. 

“Dr. Strange,” Sam inhaled a HUGE breath and I waited to hear what he had to say on the subject.  “I have to admit, Brooke, I have experience with PTSD, but what Bucky told me about what you’ve experienced -” I wasn’t upset that Bucky had discussed it, not when I knew it came from a place of concern and love.  “Strange is probably the best person to sit down with.” “Why?”  It got very quiet.  “Guys, I know he’s one of YOU,” they both shook their heads.  “OK, so he has a vastly different fashion style -” Bucky laughed and Sam rolled his eyes.  “What makes either of you think that he’s going to have answers that a regular therapist won’t?”  

I caught the look they shared - the “should we share what we know, or should we let her see it for herself first hand” look.  “He doesn’t JUST dress like a magician, Brooke,” Sam offered, looking very serious given the discussion of a man who wore a cape.  “He really does have access to information that none of us do.”  

“And you really think that he might be able to -”  Bucky tightened his hold on me.  “I told you I’d meet him, Bucky.”  I looked into his steel colored eyes and felt my breath catch.  “I will.”  

“That’s settled,” Sam said, rubbing his hands together.  “When’s the wedding?” 

#bucky barnes/oc #the falcon and the winter soldier #mention of smut #unplanned pregnancy #possible pregnancy #humor #alternate universe #fluff #Family Fluff #FLUFF AND SMUT

[far-off-flower-fields]

Weird Questions that say a lot

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans? Teacups!

2. chocolate bars or lollipops? Lollipops

3. bubblegum or cotton candy? Cotton candy

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you? We call elementary school primary school. It depended which teachers you asked, my favourites always said I was “conscientious, kind, and a pleasure to have in class”.

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups? Glass cups or bottles.

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear? I have like 4 looks, pastel, boho, and goth/witchy/grunge, also vintage-inspired which wasn’t mentioned but I love it.

7. earbuds or headphones? Depends on the shape, I love my Razr headset because it doesn’t squash my ears, and I like galaxy bud shaped earbuds, the ones with the little rubber doo-dads that fit actually in your ear. Apple or a lot of older flat earbuds cause me a lot of pain.

8. movies or tv shows? TV shows. Movies are getting longer and longer and my focus is getting shorter and shorter

9. favorite smell in the summer? Rainy days!

10. game you were best at in p.e.? The game of queue-ducking (where you go to the back of the queue to avoid your turn), or dance, or the less strength intensive parts of gymnastics. Or crying, always been great at that xD

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day? Muesli, or nothing.

12. name of your favorite playlist? I prefer to listen to full albums rather than playlists, but I have a few favourites on Spotify. Born to Run 150BPM, Infinite Indie Folk, Irish Folk: Jigs and Reels, All Out 80s/90s/00s. I also love scene/pop-punk playlists.

13. lanyard or key ring? Key Ring

14. favorite non-chocolate candy? Message Hearts (or anything with that texture), the red pack of starbursts (the UK version is vegan). Does Turkish Delight count because if so then that is my fave. I also like gummies if they’re vegan.

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment? To Kill a Mockingbird (high school), or The Bloody Chamber (uni), or Hamlet (uni)

16. most comfortable position to sit in? One foot under me, the other foot out to the other side, but both in the same position (if the surface is flat), or knees up.

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes? I own a lot of shoes so there isn’t really a single pair I wear the most. Recently my Air Force 1s, I’m trying to wear them in because the previous owner didn’t so the cause blisters.

18. ideal weather? Cold, overcast, rainy, still. Or without the rain. or snow (as long as I’m not going in the car and I can go crunch my shoes in it xD

19. sleeping position? Either side, but my body is kinda rotated towards the bed so it’s like half way between on my stomach and on my side. 

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)? Notebooks

21. obsession from childhood? Animals, dinosaurs, goddesses, magic, crystals, neopets, sims. I still love all of these things, I am a rotating door of obsessions, usually a bunch of the same obsessions on repeat.

22. role model? I don’t have one particular role model, I do have tons of people that I love and respect.

23. strange habits? I have so many strange habits that I have become one myself. Nothing actually stands out though because 99% of it is because of my brain.

24. favorite crystal? rose quartz or moonstone.

25. first song you remember hearing? Maybe Dancing Queen by ABBA, definitely the first I remember dancing to, but my dad loves music so I grew up with a constant stream of it.

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather? Suffer xD when I’m able to do so comfortably I’d love to go out looking for pretty stones, and nice sticks with my fiance, also would like to go on picnics with him, or a friend if I had one.

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather? Baking, drawing, crafts, standing in the rain. Everything.

28. five songs to describe you? 6/10 - Dodie Robert Frost - Mal Blum Caught in the Middle - Paramore Side Effects - Jade Bird Snitches Get Stitches - Onsind  Bonus track: The Seed - Aurora I wish I still had the playlist I made of songs I relate to, several of these were on it though.

29. best way to bond with you? Oversharing, or telling me about things you’re into.

30. places that you find sacred? Nature. My favourite spots are little creeks/rivers in wooded areas, but just like, all of it is special and should be treated as such. Also bedrooms.

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names? I think maybe I’m not gutsy or whatever enough, but also unpredictable. I wear whatever I like, and I’m just as likely to cry in all of them as I am to accidentally get in a fight.

32. top favorite vines? I feel so basic because I never really did the vine thing.  There was one that nearly killed me because I literally started to choke that was in some kind of office and the bit like can you run this past me again, and they just fucking legged it past them holding a folder up, Saw it once, never saw it again. Road work ahead. Why you can’t lift a house (might be a tok?) Brass dad and oven kid Look at this graaaaph Never learned how to read I can’t sit I have hemorrhoids The one with the people in blankets bobbing the nana nanana song Fr esh avo ca do Look at all these chickens

33. most used phrase in your phone? I love you - if I had to guess

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head? right now, nothing. I often get the old Super Liquor jingle lodged in there though.

35. average time you fall asleep? 6am?

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing? Charlie the unicorn or that one Noodles video by Cyanide and Happiness. Are those even memes?

37. suitcase or duffel bag? Depends. I mostly use a bag though since I never go anywhere for long.

38. lemonade or tea? Tea? Usually if you ask for lemonade here you get Sprite which is not lemonade.

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie? I had a vegan lemon meringue pie once, so good. Cake is easier to make though, and I can eat more in one sitting without getting sick xD

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school? Um, the principal in my last year of school got caught for being a peeping tom a few years after I left.

41. last person you texted? My Fiance.

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets? Jacket pockets

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket? Depends on the rest of the outfit and the weather. I wear Jean jackets most though.

44. favorite scent for soap? I love lavender, or vanilla/candy/fruity/baked goods type scents. I still have a bottle of Sugar Fairy spray from lush from a year ago and I love the smell of that.

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero? Fantasy I think.

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in? Nekkid?

47. favorite type of cheese? As a kid it was feta. Now I only eat vegan cheese. I was never a huge cheese fan tbh.

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be? Rotten xD um probably a cranberry or something because I’m small, and I’m not a fan of cranberry.

49. what saying or quote do you live by? An it harm none do what you will. Or treat others as you wish to be treated.

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have? Probably one of the vines I listed above, either “run it past” or “can’t lift a house” because both of those resulted in crying and choking.

51. current stresses? My cat has been throwing up and having diarrhoea the past week or so, she’s been to the vet, it got better for a bit, but tonight suddenly got worse. Living with my parents who I have a very toxic relationship with. Living in a single very overfilled room. Trying to not spend money so that I can save up to move next year. Nightmares about my trauma. Either the house is haunted or there’s a build up of negative energy (probably that).

52. favorite font? I always liked the look of all of the script style fonts (freestyle, french, lucida, lucida calligraphy, Edwardian, Palace) but they’re not accessible so for anything people will actually see (which is literally nothing) I always go with arial.

53. what is the current state of your hands? Slight rash on one finger because I’m sensitive to what is in a lot of hand washing products apparently (never an issue until the pandemic), one broken finger nail that is a bit shorter than the rest. Not painted nails because energy. I always wear my engagement ring, usually I wear several other rings but with how my skin is being I thought I’d better not for a while.

54. what did you learn from your first job? Bakeries are hell, my circadian rhythm will not adjust to anything besides its natural state for longer than a couple of days at a time no matter how long or hard I try. I can absolutely fall asleep standing up.

55. favorite fairy tale? Ugly Duckling

56. favorite tradition? I don’t have anyway... Yet? Hopefully when I move this can become a thing.

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome? I’m interpretting overcome loosely here, meaning “I have not died from this” - Suicide of my first love - Bullying - 3 different jobs that all nearly killed me

58. four talents you’re proud of having? Literally can’t think of one. I’m not talented. I’m passable at a couple of things, but I worked for those things and I’m still not good enough for anyone to confuse me for being talented xD Those things I care about that I’ve worked on a lot are singing, art, languages, crafts? I still struggled to come up with 4. My bad.

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? Aw jeez xD

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be? Magical Girl! This is an easy one, give me the powers and the clothes yessss.

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.? Literally sitting here drawing a blank, so instead of favourite here is the first one that came into my head “eyes are the genitals of the head” (may have that wrong, I’m watching the Office for the first time rn)

62. seven characters you relate to? Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind Amelie from Amelie Matilda from Matilda Quasimodo from the Hunchback of Notredame (also my favourite plush as a kid) Iris - The Holiday Jess - New Girl Amelia Shepherd - Grey’s Anatomy Struggled with this because suddenly I drew a blank and also couldn’t remember who my Fiance was talking about every time he’s watched a character and said “that’s you” repeatedly.

63. five songs that would play in your club? Starlight - Superman Lovers Pump It - Black Eyed Peas I Bet that You Look Good on the Dancefloor - Arctic Monkeys All the Things She Said - tATu Doctor Jones - Aqua Bonus: Push Up - Freestylers These are ones  I have memories of dancing to when I was younger so that’s how I picked, but I’d absolutely be a themed night club with different music on different nights.

64. favorite website from your childhood? Neopets, which I still play daily. The first I played was MaMaMedia, then Bubblegum Club.

65. any permanent scars? That’s a SORE subject heh get it heh

66. favorite flower(s)? Lavender, rose, peony

67. good luck charms? I usually carry gemstones if I’m needing to be particularly lucky, or sigils.

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried? I hate anything spicy. I had rootbeer candy that tasted like literal dirt. I can’t eat banana stuff without gagging and getting a headache. I hate anything that is artificial blackberry or blackcurrant, tastes like shitty cough syrup.

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned? Sea Monkeys breathe through their feet, but I remember where I learned that.

70. left or right handed? right

71. least favorite pattern? depends entirely on the colours, I like patterns. but certain stripes do make my eyes feel funny.

72. worst subject? If PE counts, then that. If not, math.

73. favorite weird flavor combo? I love pineapple on pizza but that’s not weird. Iused to eat cheese and jam sandwiches as a kid though.

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen? I operate on how long it has lasted instead of how bad it is, essentially I get so desperate so I’ll try it even though it probably won’t help. I have the resistance of a rhino to most meds.

75. when did you lose your first tooth? No idea, like 4 I think? I did keep them in a weird little box for no reason though because they never got taken away from under my pillow.

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)? I’m a fan of a good mash if it has lots of flavour (like gravy). Otherwise, crisps or fries.

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill? I grew a radish once! Something cat safe though these days, also maybe something heavy, and hard to knock over?

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store? Grocery Store sushi, if it’s just veg.

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo? My only ID is my passport, and it is BAD.

80. earth tones or jewel tones? Both.

81. fireflies or lightning bugs? Fireflies (ten million of them to be precise)

82. pc or console? Grew up with PC. Now play my switch mostly.

83. writing or drawing? Both. Wrote more as a kid, draw more now.

84. podcasts or talk radio? Podcasts.

84. barbie or polly pocket? Both. But I prefered pollies as a kid

85. fairy tales or mythology? mythology

86. cookies or cupcakes? cupcakes

87. your greatest fear? Based on my nightmares, stairs.

88. your greatest wish? To live in a comfy house, in the country, with my Fiance, I have travelled the world, we have pets, I can function, we are free.

89. who would you put before everyone else? My Fiance and out animals.

90. luckiest mistake? Can’t think of any, most of my mistakes have been more like bad choices, also never turned out well for me.

91. boxes or bags? Depends what it’s for?

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights? lamps, or fairy lights. Unless I’m particularly anxious, then overheads.

93. nicknames? None.

94. favorite season? Winter

95. favorite app on your phone? LINE, it has my fiance, and animated stickers.

96. desktop background? Little Twin Stars

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized? My own.

I never get asks and needed to distract myself so I’m going to just answer these anyway, like a survey or something. Original post by tr33-g1rl 

[collecting-stories]

Crush - Adam (Supernatural)

Could you do something where the reader hunts with Bobby and the boys, and falls for Adam?

Crush - Adam x reader

“Here you go,” you announced, stepping into the small guest room at Bobby’s, holding the glass of water out to Adam. Your hand was shakier than was typical and once he took the glass you found yourself standing awkwardly by the door, unsure of yourself. He’d sequestered himself up here almost immediately after Sam and Dean had suggested that he didn’t know what he was getting into.

The first time you had met Adam he had turned out to be a ghoul disguising himself as John Winchester’s illegitimate son. A friendly ghoul who had charmed you even easier than he had Sam but still a ghoul who fully intended on eating both brothers and you. It was unfortunate and afterwards you had to wonder why you hadn’t questioned the possibility in the first place. Maybe because you thought Adam was cute and you had the beginnings of a superficial crush on him. Or maybe because you really didn’t know him and the oddly optimistic memories of an absent father who came around once in a blue moon for a baseball game seemed normal. Either way, you and Sam both fell into the trap of a well-meaning kid who needed help and turned to John Winchester, unaware his once mythic father was dead.  

“Do you need anything else?” You asked, the silence making you anxious. You missed the appropriate cue to leave and now you were overwhelmingly aware that you had overstayed your welcome in Adam’s room.  

He shook his head and continued to stare at the glass of water in his hands.  

Crushes were funny things, like itches that you couldn’t scratch. Even when the situation at hand didn’t call for it you found that nagging at the back of your brain reminding you of stupid things like how cute, and slightly helpless, Adam looked. He was a sore spot for Dean who had spent the entirety of his life convinced his father never loved anyone but his mom. Adam felt like a betrayal, even now that he was no longer a monster in disguise and the disdain he held for John proof that the patriarch never did find love after Mary. Sam, who only remembered a John post Mary, was more welcoming of the idea of an illegitimate other Winchester, a more normal one he could be normal with. Turning out to be a ghoul had dampened his optimism and further turning out to be a risen-from-the-dead vessel for Michael was the nail in the coffin. Adam was their brother but only half and the half that made him not their brother seemed to be truly defining, even as they warned him against making any rash decisions.

You wanted to see him make the right decision, or the decision where he told Michael to go fuck himself, too, but you weren’t nearly as invested in the sibling squabble. Possibly because you weren’t a sibling but also because your own father had a countless lineage of ‘other’ children scattered across the Midwest. That and you thought Adam was cute, something Dean was quick to point out when you attempted to stick up for his motivates.  

“Some of us are thinking about the apocalypse that’s supposed to be happening. If you want to re-join that conversation and stop making heart eyes at the kid.” He’d been understandably frustrated by your lack of supposed self-control. And maybe you were staring at Adam a little too intensely but who could fault you. Living with Bobby didn’t exactly introduce you to a whole lot of eligible guys your age. Mostly all you saw were rowdy hunters. The Winchesters, despite their good looks, were no different. Adam was the first guy your age that you’d seen in months and you were seeing him for a second time, who could help having a little, harmless crush on him.  

“I was not making heart eyes.”  

Dean had taken up the role of older brother/well-meaning but emotionally distance father and that led to plenty of clashes between the two of you.  

“Guys, this isn’t the time.” Sam was designated referee for all your arguments. So while the two of them argued null points further you had taken a glass of water up to Adam, mostly to make sure he was doing alright but also, apparently, to stare at his cute face until you spontaneously combusted.  

You attempted a step further into the room. Then further and further until you were grabbing the wooden seat from the corner and sitting down by Adam’s bed. Maybe some insight into his headspace would help determine what he was going through. He was just risen from the dead to be a vessel for Michael after being eaten by ghouls not too long ago. And here you thought having the sister you lived with turn to witchcraft to send your father to an early grave was the weirdest it could get for a person.  

“I know this is all a little overwhelming.” You announced, picking imaginary threads off your flannel in hopes to ease your nerves. Ganking monsters was nothing compared to talking to cute boys. Talking to cute boys about not starting to apocalypse and potentially saving mankind was a weird way of flirting but it certainly gave you something to say.  

“Until a couple of hours ago I was in heaven and now I’m here and I’m supposed to be Michael’s vessel and you’re telling me not to? Like I told Sam and Dean, he’s promised to bring back my mom.” He snapped.  

Alright well, you didn’t exactly want the guy you thought was cute thinking that you were a major dick who didn’t care about him as a person only about the greater good and your own personal need for overdramatic heroics. That category was better reserved for Sam and Dean and sometimes Castiel in all honesty. But not you. Not you who, to some extent understood what Adam was going through. Weren’t you just a normal kid until all that freaky shit started happening and your sister’s irresponsibility got you possessed by a demon.  

Saying ‘I know’ again would only piss him off and you couldn’t imagine a sentence along the lines of ‘I get it’ or ‘I understand’ would go over quite so well either.

“Dean and Sam-”

“Dean and Sam only care about themselves. I’m not family to them and they’re not family to me.”

That didn’t help either. There was no reasoning with him. Regardless of his lineage or his willingness to be Michael’s vessel, you knew that consequences of him going through with this would be detrimental to everyone, yourself included. But then, was protecting yourself from the apocalypse at the expense of a kid who just wants his mom back selfish or were you truly looking out for the greater good?

“I don’t want you to get hurt.”  

“You don’t even know me.”  

Well, true. But you’d known a very charming ghoul-version of him that had flirted you into compliance. Granted the risen-from-the-dead version was a little less trusting of you. Though that had nothing to do with whether he thought you were cute in return and everything to do with the fact that he wasn’t planning on eating you.

“Doesn’t matter,” you lied, trying to explain to the ghoul thing to him now would be even more overwhelming than all the other things he was trying to come to terms with, “what matters is that you’re putting yourself and all of humanity at risk doing this.”  

“I don’t care.” He repeated his prior statement, emphasizing each word as if you hadn’t heard them the other twelve times.  

“Yeah I got that. But none of this will be worth it because everything will be gone and your mom won’t really be back. Michael will never keep his promise.”  

“Whatever you’re trying to do isn’t going to work. I’m doing this.”

“Don’t waste your breath on him.” Dean’s voice came from the doorway. He was as effective as having a parent around because you stood and headed for the door immediately. Dean moved so you could pass him into the hallway and then he followed you back down to Bobby’s kitchen. You couldn’t help the sullen attitude you had as you sunk into a chair.  

Adam didn’t come down from his room until later that night. Both of the brothers and Bobby had gone to sleep but you were still awake, pouring over lore books in the living room as if something you already read was going to change midway through and provide an answer that saved both the world and this damn kid that you were crushing on. But everything was the same as before and the only answer that seemed even remotely good was the one Dean had offered up over dinner, he take Adam’s place. A force of hand on both sides.  

But that answer sucked too because you didn’t want Dean to get hurt.  

“You’re still awake?” Adam asked, lingering at the bottom of the stairs awkwardly. He wasn’t sure what to say to any of the people in this house much less you, the only one who seemed interested in both telling him not to accept Michael and arguing that he had no choice.  

“It’s a combination of terrible coffee and anxiety.” You replied, glancing up from one of your books, “you should try it.”

“The coffee or the anxiety?”  

You hummed, “both?”  

He smiled and you watched him walk to the kitchen where Bobby’s coffee pot sat half full on the burner. Pouring himself a cup Adam came back over and sat beside you on the couch, an improvement from earlier when he could hardly look at you as you loomed over him in the guest room. “What are you reading?”

“Trying to solve this end of the world problem in a way that gets none of the Winchesters, yourself included, killed.” You supplied. “though so far I’m at a dead end.”

“I’m okay with being Michael’s vessel. I’ve accepted it.” Despite his vehement refusal to be associated in any way with his half-brothers that sentence alone secured his place as a Winchester.  

“Of course you did.” You muttered, thumbing through the text. It was a fool’s errand at this point but it was distracting enough to keep your mind only half on the hopelessness of the situation.  

“Why do you care?”

“Because I care about Dean and Sam. And Bobby and Cas and I don’t want any of this shit to go down like I know it’s going to. Sorry but they’re my family. I don’t have the luxury of ‘bringing my mom back’ and I know better than to try that shit.” You confessed. It was all partially true. The other part being that you felt drawn to Adam in a way that half made you believe you were trapped in one of Gabriel’s stupid time-warp tv drama universes. Like this was some teen romcom and together you would figure everything out and walk off into the sunset in time for your prom like Footloose.  

“You don’t understand than.”

“I do, but I don’t wanna see you get hurt either.”  

“Why? Because I’m a ‘Winchester’? I’m not.” He replied. He took a sip of the coffee and grimaced, “you’re right, this is terrible.”

You huffed a laugh and smiled just the slightest at his comment. Bobby did make terrible coffee. “I know you ‘aren’t a Winchester’ and all that...but I still am worried about you and it has nothing to do with Dean and Sam. I don’t want to see anyone get hurt and even if Michael doesn’t hurt you I don’t want you getting your hopes up for nothing.”

“I have to take the chance.”  

You nodded and looked away. Dean had once told you that hunting was complicated and that relationships couldn’t happen in the life they led. It just wasn’t a possibility for them and if you chose to join them on the road than you would have to give up those friendships that you had back home. At the time it didn’t bother you but now you were starting to understand, even potential crushes were a waste of time because they either turned out to be monsters or boys with misguided senses of heroism that wanted to sacrifice themselves for a cause they believed in.  

“Hey, I’m sorry.” Adam’s hand covered yours, his thumb rubbing gently over the side of your hand, the slightest tickling sensation causing goosebumps to breakout on your arm. “You seem like a great person, I wish things could’ve been different.”

“Tell me about it.” You replied, deciding not to torture yourself by reading too far into the phrase ‘great person’.  

“Do you want help?” He offered, “I don’t know what I’m looking for but, I can’t sleep.”

You pulled your hand away to reach for a book on the coffee table, “I’ll take all the help I can get.” It was true, you could use an extra set of eyes. And if this was the most you could ask for from Adam than you would take it.  

-

Sorry this took so long. Honestly I’ve been writing this since I got the request in my inbox and it’s just taken me this long to put thoughts into words. I don’t even know if this is decent, I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that it is. 

#Adam (supernatural) imagine #Adam (supernatural) x reader #Adam (supernatural) fanfic #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural imagine #supernatural fanfic #collecting stories imagine

[danachristinehare]

i fell down the rabbit hole

in middle school i started listening to Fall Out Boy. i remember being obsessed with their song Sugar, We’re Going Down. i will never forget a moment in time, i had their lyrics printed out, and my room was a mess, and my mom came in one day and found the printed lyrics, and got mad at me for what i was listening to. the album as a whole is song after song pretty much about casual sex, and there’s a specific lyric in Sugar, We’re Going Down about taking aim at yourself with a weapon. i was probably 11? or 12? i remember my mom not wanting me to listen to them anymore. and now they are my favorite band, and have been since. this was like 14 years ago.

i was weirdly conditioned to like a band because my mother didn’t want me to like them. and i believe that reverse psychology level of thinking correlates with the things you like in general, including people.

in 2007 i moved to Florida and started high school and had the weirdest crush on a guy, Matt Hare. he was a year older than me, he definitely did not like me, but like a weirdo virgin pre-teen i found myself writing his name on my binders, and talking about him late night at slumber parties with my girlfriends.

now let’s fast forward to 2015. this is the part where i come forward about a lot of weird shit, and some stuff i am not so proud of that i have put behind me. i haven’t come forward on a lot of this stuff because my past embarrasses me, but it’s time to accept that my past has MADE me who i am today.

the year is 2015, and i am a little lost. all of my friends are graduating from college, but i never went. i had been working at the same dead end fast food restaurant since highschool. i was partying. i was getting caught up with the wrong folks. i was doing party drugs for the lack of not having any other hobbies. Matthew Hare and i re-meet, and in a weird drugged out terrible point of my life, we get together, and i immediately move in. the drug using gets worse; and i can’t blame it on Matt, as easy as it could be, that was me. those were my choices. quickly into my downward spiral, Matt and i on a whim get married.

now, this whole time, i have one girl i know telling me all these terrible things about Matt. “alleged” things of course. you all know what i am talking about. i also have three more girls i don’t really know telling me all these same/similar terrible alleged things about Matt. but i don’t even know them? i went to highschool with one of them, and we had ceramics class together but. i feel like i knew Matt way more than i knew even the one girl i can claim to be an old school acquaintance...but the one girl i knew? she pushed me, mentally, the same way my mom pushed me as a kid with listening to fall out boy. i WANTED to rebel. i wanted the attention. i wanted to be a big deal. i wanted to prove something. i don’t know what i was trying to prove, and i don’t think i knew what kind of attention i was getting myself into, but i was too far gone. i started calling all these girls the “Matt Hare Hate Club” ...instead of using love and reason to get to me and help me realize the mistakes i was making, they used scare tactics and fear. the way they approached me, i felt more inclined to help Matt, to protect him, stand up for him, over joining their side. once i started to stand up for Matt, these girls didn’t even try to continue to help me, even though they knew deep down i needed help. once i started standing up for Matt, they treated me as if i WAS Matt. the town of St Augustine, and the Matt Hare Hate Club (which extended to locals all over town) started pushing us out. i will never know who to blame for what, but my car got beat with bats (or some other blunt objects), we had a brick thrown in our window, we had the windows of our house punched out, i got thrown out of a bar just because my last name was “Hare” ...my life just kinda got turned upside down really quickly. so we moved to Tennessee.

life was okay. there was lots of ups, and very few downs, and the downs weren’t dramatically down. my drug use slowed down, because it was harder to find and more expensive, but i don’t think his drug use ever stopped. i think he just got way better at hiding it. and then, i got pregnant, and everything, and i mean EVERYTHING changed.

a lot of this hurts me to my core still, i don’t like admitting defeat, or admitting when i was wrong about something, nobody does really...and i am not really good at talking about it, i don’t like talking about it, and i wish it would all just go away, but i realize now that i need to talk about it before anyone else gets hurt.

so its late 2016 now and i got pregnant, and Matthew was dead set on me getting an abortion. obviously, i didn’t take this path. me keeping a baby he didn’t want, i believe, was the true start of problems.

one night mid 2017, i believe i was about 7 months pregnant, we got in an argument. i honestly don’t even remember what the argument was about? but that’s how every argument with Matt is. i remember he was drunk, he potentially was on drugs, i was obviously very sober (and very pregnant) ...all i really remember is that he came after me, i fell backwards on the couch, and he pushed my leg down towards my body almost past the point where i couldn’t stretch it anymore. he tried breaking my leg. i kept kicking. i stayed strong. he starting biting my foot, i still have a scar; and i kicked back so hard i knocked his front tooth out. i got away, scooped up the dogs, and drove straight to a friends house. i was hurt, emotionally and physically. i was terrified. i didn’t know what to do. i didn’t want to talk to anyone. i couldn’t afford to live on my own. i didn’t want to move home. i was about to deliver a baby in a few weeks? my life hit rock bottom.

life settled. he swore he didn’t mean it. “i was drunk, that’ll never happen again”

i thought i couldn’t abruptly move my life this far into my pregnancy. i stayed. i kept my distance, but i went back home, i stayed, i delivered my baby in Tennessee. things seemed as normal as they could be, given the circumstances. we started having problems, regular problems, but these regular relationship problems came with the background of being assaulted by my partner, pregnant, just a few months prior. i knew i wanted to leave, i knew i wanted a divorce, but i needed my safety. i didn’t know how to do it. thankfully at that point in my life i had my ex girlfriend, Chelsea, who i owe a lot too, despite how life changed between us and despite the breakup we had. she helped me come up with a plan that allowed me and Maggie’s safety. Maggie and I one morning packed up all our stuff, and moved back home to Florida, “for a better life and to be closer to family again” with the illusion that Matt would move back down with us when our Tennessee lease was up. this bought me time. time passed quickly. i didn’t complete my plans. before i knew it, the lease in Tennessee was up and Matt was moving back to Florida. to my house, with my parents. it lasted about 4 long rough months.

now it’s 2018, August the 16th, and i am at work. Matt’s at home, well, my parents home, watching Maggie while i work. i get a concerned text message about a rash. i hurry home from work, and the rash seems alarming, so we take her to the emergency room. i don’t get a lot of questions answered. i don’t know what’s happening. the doctors tell me they know it’s not a rash, but don’t know much else. suddenly late night, the cops show up with DCF and we’re all being questioned. turns out it wasn't a rash she had, it was petechiae. petechiae is the result of bleeding underneath the skin from blunt trauma, specifically asphyxiation/strangulation and loss of airflow to the brain, or at least that’s how the cops explained it to me. i told them what i knew. i was at work. she was in Matt’s care. of course they asked me if i thought Matt could be capable of harming our daughter, i knew he was capable, but i froze and said “uh...i don’t know” because realistically everything was happening really fast and i jumped to thinking NOBODY was capable of harming an innocent baby, let alone their own, but i am realizing now i was so very wrong, and so very lucky that my little girl is still with me. the day upon getting released from the hospital, DCF showed up to our house and ordered Matt out of the home and to not have any alone contact with Maggie without agreed upon supervision, being my parents or his parents. while in the hospital, Maggie underwent a full body bone scan X-ray. to this day i haven’t seen the results of that, though i have requested them. as far as my understanding goes, Matt was heavily investigated by the police and DCF and then the case was just closed. i didn’t tell the DCF agent on my case that Matt *could* have done something like this. i remember i was wearing a mustard yellow shirt that said “Mothers are Magic” on it, and she had the audacity to ask me if i wore that shirt to impress her, to prove to her that was some cool/good mom. i didn’t know she was coming that quick. that’s just the shirt i was wearing, i have a ton of motherhood related shirts. she pushed fear into me. i closed up. i didn’t tell her everything. i didn’t tell her he had hurt me. looking back on it now, i don’t know why i did half of the things that i did. but it’s what happened.

we’re here now. i am safe, and Maggie is safe. but i didn’t speak up when i should’ve, and because of that, the safety of another was put at risk. now Matt is in jail with a $4,000 bond for battery. thank god nobody died because of this man.

fear isn’t a good tactic to get someone to listen/trust/share...fear shuts people down. fear led me to go down a really deep dark rabbit hole, literally.

i never wanted to share my story. i was, i still am, embarrassed. i was wrong. i fucked up. but everything happens for a reason, and i am still trying to learn what some of the reasons are in this situation. but i am mad at myself for not speaking up sooner. but. we’re here now.

i don’t want to talk about this further. you can comment, you can leave praise, you can tell me i am “strong” or whatever other clichés you can think of, but i don’t want to engage in conversation further about any of this.

and to the Matt Hare Hate Club, i know y’all will see this. you can reach out to me in civil means. i don’t want any “i told you so” moments, i don’t want to be friends, i don’t want drama, just some solidarity. if that’s not what you’re looking for, please continue to leave me alone.

the silver lining to all of this? i got the most special little girl in the whole wide world. Magdalena, i love you, you’re 100 percent mine. i will raise you right. your dad is my life partner, Eli VeDepo. blood doesn’t make a family. when you’re old enough to understand why our family is unquestionably unique, i will tell you where you came from. but for now, you’re 2, and i am going to let you be a kid, and continue to do everything in my power to keep you safe. one day you’ll read this and know how much your mom loves you.

[isobel-thorm]

11, 19, 27, 38 for the writing ask thing? 😊

11.  Books and/or authors who influenced you the most: YOU. Also @devotchkas and @nickiburkes and @foofygoldfish because y’all are my #1 Enablers. 

19.  How do you keep yourself motivated? I don’t. Honestly lately for the FC5 fandom it’s been spite. 

27.   Favourite line/scene

In my Marvel/Tasertricks fanfic Tangled: 

Loki stared between them before he started to pace frantically. “ ‘Ignorant mortals’? ‘Fools’? ‘Insects’? They are good people! Better people than any of us! What they lack in skills, combat or otherwise, they make up for in heart. That used to be important to you” … “The ‘lost girl’’s name is Darcy,” he began. “She might not have the intelligence the other two do, but she’s just and loyal and so bloody determined to make her mark on the world that her worth is equal to them. The Pretender, as you called, her: Jane, is one of the most intelligent beings I know, she could put our own scientists to shame! And Selvig- Selvig’s just as intelligent as she is! And he too is just, and willing to see the best in people, even when there’s none to be had, and, and-“ he could feel the hot tears forming and his throat constricting, but it was far too late by then. He felt ripped open, feelings on display, clear as day, and he had done it to himself. He wanted to stop, but he couldn’t. “…And he’s been a better father to me in a short few weeks than you ever were to me all my life!” he finished.

… 

And then, just as he was leaving, he heard two chairs move. He couldn’t bring himself to stop entirely, but something slowed his pace.

That was, until he realized who one of the chairs belonged to, since Odin called out, “where are you going?!”

And again, without so much as thinking, without considering what he was truly saying, Loki turned back sharply. “HOME!” he roared.

It was after the answering moment of silence after the word echoed around the entire hall that he realized what he had said, and the implications that came with it. To his surprise, after focusing on it, he found no fault in it. It was true. It was a rash, rushed decision, but it was true. He saw that the other one who had risen was Thor, and the latter looked just as stunned as he probably did, but there was also the hint of a smile tugging at the side of his mouth. Loki looked away again. “I’m going home,” he said again, firmer this time.

and 

Loki glanced down to investigate just how and why his dagger had managed such force that it threw the creature- and his heart skipped a beat.

He wasn’t holding his dagger.

He was holding Mjolnir.

And of course, for New Divide: 

John looked down, then back up. “This… is the will of the Deputy,” he finished. 

and

“This thing might as well be a fucking Apocalypse baby if any of this is true. We can call it ‘Cal’ for short!” the motioned at her stomach- just as the song on the radio had ended. Thankfully not the John part, but everything directly after. The cat was half out of the bag just because of her own carelessness.  And every single person in the bar turned to look at her. Mary May wasn’t among them, thankfully, but the guy who looked like Staci who always hung out by the fishing record wall was, which made it even worse.

She immediately slammed her mouth shut and went red. She ducked her head to cover it up.

“Who’s the father?” Addie asked, too loudly, to throw everyone else off. A moment later the next song started off, and she tried not to look too relieved.

Despite her panic, Nicolette had never loved her more. She opened her mouth to give any name she could think of, even a fake one- and then forgot every single man she’d come across’ name and couldn’t even string two together to bullshit one.

There was a strangled noise behind them, then: “Uh… s’mine! I am!”

She froze at that- until she recalled that John was still half a town away and that voice had been at least an octave deeper, rougher, and distinctly more southern. And belonged to her best friend. And was probably the least equipped man in the county to be a father.

Sharky, who had suddenly become far less brave in the seconds after his outburst, gave her a look that was equal parts “someone’s got to” and “I’ve made a huge mistake.”

38.  Weirdest character concept you’ve ever had: I’m not saying my real weirdest character concept because at this rate a certain someone’ll take it and then accuse me of copying, but his boyfriend was this immortal who knew and had a vendetta against H.G Wells and any time someone would ask him about it he’d continue to fly off the handle about it and get so mad about hearing his name that he wouldn’t even answer, or his logic was just so odd that they couldn’t keep up. 

#amistrio

[cinderscoria]

Dude, that dream was wild! Holy cow! And congrats on winning the case! That's awesome! :)

IF YOU THINK THAT WAS WILD

I JUST DREAMED *AGAIN*

AND IT INVOLVED MY LONGTIME CRUSH?? HE. DIED.

Oh my god. This was just. Okay. So I went to his funeral and it was really fucking upsetting. No one knew why I was there, why I was REALLY there, ‘cause save for a handful of people no one knows IRL how massive of a crush I have on this guy (it goes back to eighth grade and apparently I never fucking got over it, real inconvenient). I worked with him for about two weeks at Starbucks before he left to go find himself/be promoted lmao but anyway I used that as my cover for being there because even still I was reluctant to reveal just how deep my fondness for this kid went. I waited pretty much the whole day to get alone with his coffin—this is fucking weird to say dude, this is a real person and he better fucking still be alive but anyway—it was open coffin so I was trying to have a second so I could properly confess my feelings (everybody was having one of these moments apparently and bawling and Oscar, one of my coworkers, was one of them so that was weird). Also like. Because it was open coffin sometimes he would just sit up and talk to people. Like, hallucinations of course, of the desperately grieving, he was still dead, but this way we could have conversations I dunno it was a weird dream this isn’t even the weirdest part.

The weirdest fucking part. was my mom was there, again, partially as a real estate agent (I think was her cover??) and partially as… some kind of… I have no fucking clue. A cop? A reporter? She was investigating the owners of the house, because practically the whole school was there and there had been a rash of robberies and vandalism that everyone knew was the football team but no one could prove it. And I… kinda snapped. It was getting towards the end of the day and my crush’s ghost had been playing tag with me all day and I wanted to talk to him, but the funeral was wrapping up. So I made a scene.

I was clutching like a soccer ball or something too wtf, and I started yelling and stomping around about how I waited and waited and it should be my turn but it was obvious I wasn’t talking to the guests, I was talking to my crush (my crush’s ghost??), and everyone was staring, and I have no idea how but I brought it back around to the robberies and I was basically insinuating that I could talk to ghosts and my crush was telling me exactly who did the crimes and I exposed the fuck outta them lmao

Mom was like “I already know this Jas” and she laid out her reasoning, which, bless her heart, was dead (heh) wrong, and I literally said “Mom, you’re missing a key element to the motive behind these crimes” and she was like “what” and I shouted “they’re FUCKING B O R E D” and was not even mortified that I just swore in front of my mother, I just went on and on about how the football team and some of the “popular girl” cliques were so utterly bored that they kept winning games and it was getting monotonous and they needed something else to spice their lives up so they just turned to a life of crime, because that’s a logical jump, and the captain of the football team agreed and confessed and then they all confessed and I stood by feeling smug as all their butts were arrested. Apparently I orchestrated this whole plan 'cause I knew my mom would be there, so go me. But my crush was still very dead. Or was he.

I don’t even know, I woke up at the part where I was in the living room and we were all still mourning but his parents were talking about… something and it made it sound like he was still alive, and then I thought I heard his voice, and then I woke up and remembered that he IS still alive and I’ve never been more relieved to wake up in my entire life, literally I usually hate waking up but even if I never have a chance with him at least he’s not, you know, dead.

It was stressful.

#dream journal #cinder's asks #thank you by the way! I am ALSO relieved that the case is over and done with and she won't see a penny 😊

[cupkayke]

The character ask thing: Boueibu A's aka Akihiko, Akoya and Atsushi (if that's too many you can just pick who you want)

WI already answered Aki, so here I’ll do the other two A’s!

Akoya

NOTP: I don’t really have NOTPs like at all so this question is always really hard, but I guess I’m pretty ‘meh’ about Akoya with Kinshiro. Like, could I see it working? Maybe. Do I think they’d actually be attracted to each other in the first place? Probably  not...

BROTP: Everyone Brotps Akoya with Ryuu and I agree with the sentiment. Pinks gotta have their silly rivalry. Could definitely also see Akoya being besties with Aki and/or Haru, once the third years graduate.

OTP: Here I go again with my OT3s but AkoIoRyuu is my jam. But I suppose I’ll talk more about the OT3 in the poly question. If I had to pick ONE, I do really like AkoRyuu because the angst dynamics have a lot of potential and they just seem like they’d be really... explosive. Passionate. Ooh la la. That’d leave poor Io alone though so it kind of makes me sad lol.

Second Choice Pairing: AkoRima, considering that seems to be everyone’s OTP with Akoya. I like the dynamic well enough; it seems like Ibushi would pay a shitload of attention to Akoya and Akoya would eat up every second of it but idk I feel bad saying this but Ibushi as a character still doesn’t really stick out to me :/ So like... I’m pretty blase about all the ships including him.

Fluffy Pairing: Yumotoooooo because smol fluff child. Despite pretty exclusively shipping Yumoto with a/both Beppus this would be the only ship involving Akoya that I could see being tooth-rottingly cute. Akoya screams sophistication and like old-school romance or fiery passion and Yumoto would be the only one who could probably bring out his softer, cutesy side. Let Yumoto brush and play with his hair? Yas. Snuggle pajama party? Yas. 

Angsty Pairing: The aforementioned AkoRyuu. Because holy smokes I feel like I am alone in pinkship land but like two words; hate fucking. I have a fanfic premise for them built around an enemies to frenemies to frenemies with benefits to friends with benefits to boyfriends and it just sounds so delicious. Imagine the snark, the sass, the spontaneous makeout sessions. Y’know these boys would be passionate and put in 110% to whichever emotion they were processing. Which likely would be a combination of annoyance and lust. Damn I need to write this thing. Along with my twelve other fic ideas -cries-

Polyship: AkoIoRyuuuuuuu and now I get to talk about it. Like okay. Take the fiery spark that is Akoya and Ryuu together and add in the mutual pining for Io (the other element to the pinkship) and then lo and behold Io is a willing participant...? Io would balance the pinks out, bringing a level head to their sometimes rash behaviors yet spoiling them silly when he’s feeling particularly mushy. The pinks would probably have their strengths and weaknesses in meeting Io’s needs- like Akoya knows about the finer things and would definitely look good on his arm at any fancy business events whereas Ryuu would be the more lowkey one and their strong friendship would form a foundation for Io’s emotional support. Idk they have such potential for their dynamics and again, there need to be more fics with them. And by that I mean fics that aren’t AUs (because I swear it seems like half the boueibu fics are AUs and... I’ll shut up before I start ranting).

Weirdest Pairing: Um, Akoya/En? Akoya/Atsushi? I can’t see either of those really happening but then again in weird ways they may work. Unfortunately I can’t put words to it, though.

Atsushi

NOTP: Atsushi/Yumoto? Idk I see more brother/senpai/parental dynamics from these two and I just... cannot see it romantically at all. Hm, maybe I do have some NOTPs. But does anyone ship this anyway? Lol.

BROTP: The obvious En/Kinshiro when they aren’t shipped romantically. Atsushi has his best friends and they’re all so precious. Also weirdly if the boys started hanging out at Yumoto’s house more instead of in the onsen I could see Atsushi getting along well with Gora. They seem to have a similar personality.

OTP: Enatsu all the wayyyyyyy. If we’re picking a non-poly ship, that is. Like isn’t that everyone’s OTP with him? Maybe? Best friends blossoming into boyfriends is my shit. It’s adorable. Atsushi takes care of En in all the best ways and En helps Atsushi lighten up a little.

Second Choice: I ship Enatsu more than Kinatsu so I guess Kinatsu is the second choice here. Still cute dynamics but with a more unrequited love becomes requited vibe on Kinshiro’s end. It does feel weird to me though to have these two as a standalone ship because then... where does that leave En??? And in my boueibu-verse everyone gets paired off and is happy but I just cannot decide which pairings I like best lol (someone save meeeee)

Fluffy Pairing: Kinatsu has more potential for just sheer fluff like I can’t. Kinshiro being the delicate thing that he is needing reassurance and attention and Atsushi, having learned his lesson with the curry thing, won’t let anything fester or settle and they talk things out and cuddle and go on cute dates and aldsfjasldkfjal;sdkj -explodes- okay maybe they’re cuter than I thought they were.

Angsty Pairing: ...actually, literally the same answer, but twist Kinshiro’s response to a jealousy angle over En and you have the makings of some drama right there. Or the OT3 could have Atsushi be caught in the middle for even more potential angst.

Polyship: Enatsukin? Kinenatsu? Enkinatsu? What is this ship name even? BUT YES THAT ONE. I ship this OT3 even more than the other polyships I like and that’s saying something. Because this way, none of these three are left alone and both En and Kinshiro get Atsushi’s caretaking and empathetic nature and Atsushi gets the strong friendship foundations he has with both of them and they all have this mutual trust going on once En and Kinshiro come around to the idea and deal with their feelings for one another as well as for Atsushi. 

Weirdest Pairing: I can’t quite wrap my brain around Atsushi/Arima but then again it kinda works to put the two ‘mom’ characters together. And the two sass masters. Like, it fits but it’s weird to me.