Tumgik
#whenever I tell people this story I’m usually like ‘yeah lol I didn’t draw it neither of us completed it’ but lemme tell you a lil something
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Can you do a one shot or head canon about How would you take poly satosugu meeting the new trio? How would y/n and Gojo feel about them, does Geto feel some sort of bond with Yuuji since they both have to deal with swallowing gross things lol, yeah
Sure thing!
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Megumi obviously knew the dynamic of your relationship with Satoru and Suguru, but Yuuji and Nobara weren’t exactly given the heads up that you three were a throuple. They initially thought there were witnessing some type of cheating drama when they saw Satoru kiss you, and then kiss Suguru when he dropped off some paperwork a few hours later. They’re even more concerned whenever they see you guys hanging out and being all buddy-buddy with each other during lunch breaks.
This isn’t the first time you’ve had to deal with people thinking you guys are cheating on each other. You guys just go about your business as usual until someone brings it up. That person would be Nobara, who thinks it’s you that’s getting stabbed in the back.
She’s said it herself, point-blank and without an ounce of hesitation, about how much she respects and looks up to someone like you. You’re damn good at your job, and you do things your own way. Her reasons for coming out to the city and studying as a sorcerer are selfish, but you never discouraged her from being true to herself. Just as you want the best for her, she wants the same for you.
“Seriously, that blindfold idiot is nothing but a two-timing scumbag!” she snarls. “And so is that freak with the bangs and creepy smile!”
Why do they always zero in on the bangs? You humorously wonder. And the smile. People are always put off by his smile.
“And-” she slams her balled hand on top of your desk, rattling the picture frame that has a picture of Satoru, Suguru, and you back when you three were students yourselves, “He has the nerve to do it right in front of his students, in the middle of his dumbass lectures of all things!”
“Kugisaki,” you calmly interject. Thankfully, she gives you her full attention, but she’s grumbling a few heated words under her breath. You’re able to make out “bastards” and “perverts”. Oh, this is going to be a good story to share over dinner. “While I’m glad to know you’d have my back if someone was ever cheating on me-”
“Of course I would!” she gasps. “I can’t stand watching those two flirt in front of me. They’re practically sucking each other’s faces off. It’s gross!”
“They tend to do that.”
“Seriously?! Ugh, that must be so…so…”
Finally, you see her connect the dots inside her head. She looks at you, body stiff as a rock, and asks, “Are you…and him…and him…”
“Are the three of us dating?” you finish the question for her. She nods. Her eyes are sparkling with a bit of embarrassment. “We are.”
“(Y/N)-san!” she whines. You’re nearly knocked out of your seat and onto the ground when she suddenly tackle-hugs you. “Why didn’t you tell me?! Now I feel like such an idiot!”
Her behavior reminds you of how Satoru was when he was a student. Clingy and a bit slow on the uptake. You probably shouldn’t tell Nobara that. She’ll kill you for making that comparison.
Meanwhile, at the exact same time Nobara was piecing together the truth, Satoru and Suguru are desperately trying to explain to Yuuji how you’re all dating each other and that there's no cheating happening. For some reason, it’s not sticking to him. Suguru, despite his poise demeanor and high levels of patience, is getting ticked off. They’ve been going at this for half an hour.
“Yuuji, it’s not that hard to understand,” Satoru groans. “See? I even made a simple diagram,” he points to his elementary level drawings of you, Suguru, and him on the chalkboard. “I’m dating (Y/N), who’s dating Suguru, and he’s also dating me.”
“And together,” Sugru grabs another piece of chalk and draws a big circle around the entire graph. “All three of us are in a relationship.”
“Oh…Oh!” Yuuji gasps. “I think I get it now!”
Suguru lets out a sigh of relief. That sense of calm is then shattered by Satoru asking, “You still don’t get it, do you?”
“No,” Yuuji admits. “Please, just explain it to me one more time!”
The piece of chalk Suguru was holding snaps in half.
I think Yuuji would be the one to feel a sort of bond with Suguru first when it comes to their shared experience of eating gross things for the sake of jujutsu sorcery. Yuuji might even ask if he could have a taste of the curses Suguru captures because he finds his technique very fascinating to witness. Funny enough, the first time he witnesses Suguru swallow one of his black orbs he thought it was chocolate. You then made a joke about how much Suguru has been obsessed with chocolate since high school, only for him to put you in a painful headlock.
Don’t worry, Satoru caught onto the joke and he happily played along.
Satoru: Yeah, he just can’t get enough of that chocolate! He’ll disappear for a couple of days because he’s so obsessed with it! Sometimes, I think he loves it more than he loves us!
Suguru: It sounds like you guys want to sleep on the couch tonight, maybe even for the rest of the week. Is that right?
You: Shut up man!
Satoru: It’s alright babe! If we give him some chocolate he’ll forget why he was ever mad in the first place!
Suguru then made you both sleep on the couch for the rest of the week.
All jokes aside. Suguru would keep a bottle of water and a few snacks on hand whenever Yuuji has to swallow one of Sukuna’s fingers. He’s somewhat envious that the kid can laugh about how awful the object tastes, but he figures it’s just his way to distract himself from the discomfort. He always gives a proud pat on Yuuji’s back and the kid beams every time. He won’t ever say it out loud, but Yuuji is definitely his favorite first year. Don't be surprised if after he dies and then comes back to life he suggests having Yuuji hide out in your guys' house.
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harmoni-me · 3 years
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hi! wanted to tell you that i absolutely love your writing skills, it’s so different from the others that i've read and it makes me feel so warm inside. keep up the good work! i'm really looking forward to seeing more
if you don’t mind, i'd like to request for a poly nagito x sweetheart reader x kokichi where they’re still in the crushing/pining stage and being confused about their sexuality. thank you, have a good day/night!💙
Phew! I finally did it! My fingers kinda hurt from typing all this haha! But I loved the request a lot! I played around with the concept you gave me as well, so it’s a story that branches out into multiple styles of writing. I do have to warn you though, goodness is this one long! But I hope you enjoy it all in the same! <3
I’m so sleepy lol 
quick trigger warning beware! : There is a scene in this where a character goes through mental hysteria that contains some panic attack like symptoms. If you are sensitive to that writing, please, skip the the fluffy scene that if used for comfort right after :) (Or just don’t read it at all, don’t worry! Harmoni understands!)
Nagito Komaeda x Sweetheart Reader x Kokichi Ouma! Pt. 1
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Also can we just talk about this gif? It makes me so happy...This artist is so good too like WHOA! Check them out! 
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“No…“
“1, 2, 3, 4-“
“NO-“
“5, 6, 7, 8!” Nagito finished, moving the silver, dog-shaped play piece across the board in rhythmic taps.
“NOOOO! BOARDWALK, NAGITO?! FUCKING BOARDWALK?!” Kokichi shrieked in a fit of rage, slamming his Panta drink onto the table, while standing up and causing an absolute fit.
Nagito was chuckling at the enraged boy, who was now standing on the kitchen counters, stomping in pure fury. Kokichi was a huge brat. A clingy, competitive, always-begging-for-something, whole-hearted brat. Though, Nagito would have to admit that he could never stay mad at Kokichi, in fact, he would have to say that he barely gets mad at him. Ever. He reminded the white-haired boy of a playful puppy, bounding and bucking happily when getting what it wants. It made Nagito’s heart melt, evaporate, then simply melt again, even when he was a cursing mess stomping on the granite countertops, getting scratches all over it.
“Woah! Nagi, that’s amazing! You got Boardwalk really early in the game, that’s so cool!” You smiled, while also laughing at Kokichi’s ferocious cursing as ambiance. Your smile drove Nagito’s attention away from the angered boy, and his heart went through overdrive once he saw your sweet smile, radiating so much contagious joy. It’s almost as if he was on a roller coaster that contained a different track each and every time he rode it. One minute, his heart would be doing loops, and the next, it excitedly go up again.
. . .
Now, this is where the problem begins. Well, the one of three problems that plague the three individuals all playing a simple game of Monopoly on a Sunday night. This is Nagito’s problem: Whenever he has an effect on Kokichi, making him oh-so-lovable in his eyes, his heart swells and fills his chest to the brim. Oh, was this feeling that was so incredibly foreign to him feel so wonderful when it dawned upon him for the first time.
Nagito could always draw the memory back within his vision in surreal detail. Kokichi and Nagito were loitering in the hallways of Hope’s peak, with the shorter purple-haired boy dragging the pale, frizzy haired boy by the hand to apparently “Conjure up the biggest most awesome-est prank Hope’s Peak has every witnesses since built into existence”. Honestly, how could Nagito say no to something that holds so much potential hope and despair, all contained in one big gift-wrapped surprise of a prank on the whole school?
After planning for a few hours, Kokichi seemed to have a fuse broken in his brain due to thinking about a truly fool-proof plan. The somewhat drowsy prankster reached into his schoolbag and pulled out two twin bottles of grape Panta, sliding one over to an unsuspecting Nagito. The purple plastic bottle bonked into Nagito’s forearm, knocking the bottle down from the force.
“Nehehe, I guess you really are the Ultimate Lucky student, huh? It just so happens I packed an extra today, Shamrock! Make it up to me sometime soon, okaaaaay?” Kokichi giggled, teasing the lanky, somewhat socially-awkward Nagito who was sitting across from him on a desk within a totally abandoned classroom. Nagito thanked the other, though, Kokichi really couldn’t respond due to being in the middle of chugging his favorite carbonated drink.
Nagito turn to his own bottle. He wasn’t the biggest fan of old-fashioned artificial grape flavored things, but it wasn’t the worst. Plus, it would be quite rude to refuse a drink from a friend, right? So the white haired boy simply picked up the bottle, and twisted the cap off, as per usual etiquette of opening a soda bottle.
Splash
It didn’t take too long until Nagito knew what was going on. The drink had exploded everywhere. The bottle of soda was basically empty by the end of the grape-geyser showcase, and poor Nagito was left drenched in purple, sticky, sugary liquid. The drink already was starting to dry into a thin, sweet crust on his skin, making the boy on a whole other level of uncomfortable. Though, it was kind of expected that Kokichi would be absolutely laughing his butt off in the moment, sounding like some sort of hysteric hyena mixed with a duckling quacking at some breadcrumbs. It was a laughable sight, no doubt, Nagito literally looked like the embodiment of a sad, wet dog.
But then Kokichi settled down after a bit, controlling his breathing from the pathetic sight. After doing so, he got up out of his seat, and knelt down to scrummage through his bag, revealing a regular branded water bottle. He then made his way over to Nagito, and without hesitation, sat himself on his soda-soaked lap.
“Aww, really going for that kicked puppy look, are you now? Well, since I’ve had all my laughing fun from this, I guess it’s only natural that I help you out, hm? Or would you rather just stay just like this? Oh, now, I wouldn’t mind it if we did…though it seems your eyes beg to differ…well in that case, let’s clean you up, shall we?” Kokichi hummed, teasing the ever living daylights out of the wet and miserable boy.
Kokichi then did something that made Nagito’s heart pound harder than it ever had before. The teasing boy reached behind his neck, untying his beloved checkered bandana. He then carefully opened the water bottle, and poured the contents onto the fabric. Once ensuring it was thoroughly soaked, Kokichi started to wash off as much of the stickiness he could. to Ruffling Nagito’s hair, from gently washing his pale cheeks, which were now sprinkled with specks of rose, and finally gliding the cloth along Nagito’s clothes and hands.
A few things in Nagito’s mind had clicked into place after Kokichi had handled him with the care equal to that of a lover. Well, ironically, Nagito had caught feelings for his tiny little prankster brat of a friend. Was it a huge surprise? Not really, based on the track that Nagito was on.
Another piece of the puzzle had snapped: Kokichi was a a guy. That was something really to think about. Never had Nagito found men attractive, but…
Finally, the last, and most worrying puzzle piece out of them all: Kokichi wasn’t the only one he has fell for. His heart has become torn in that moment, with every day becoming more of a wrestling match to the death rather than a silly tug-of-war between feelings. The other side of his heart was unsure, and fell for another person that had lifted him up through his lowest lows, supporting him like a much needed pair of crutches when having a sprained ankle.
And that person, was you.
. . .
“Ok ok ok ok ok! Listen here you little damn shamrock you!” Kokichi huffed, now sitting back on the ground, leg crossed, “You and I both know that I have Park Place, right? Right! Now, my dear little clover, I want to make a deal with you, if you will?” Kokichi smirked with evil intent clear within his irises.
“Ooo! Deals! Nagi, I think you should listen to Kichi, making profitable partnerships is pretty much his specialty.” You giggled, basically becoming Kokichi’s personal little advocate. He let out a quick “Yeah, what she said!”, causing Nagito to laugh and nod, gesturing for an explanation of the deal.
“Well, personally, my little clover, I feel like we should team up, you know? We could completely dominate over sweet our little gumdrop over there, making them drop to their knees in submission to us. You know, I have a feeling you and I both would enjoy it...” Kokichi shuffled a little closer to the platinum blonde, voice dropping, “We could rule them over together, as equals, or even make them surrender if they ever have the chance-“
“Sure! Though, you should probably get out of jail first.” Nagito chuckled, making the other boy grumble.
“OH YOU-“
“Heeeeey! I wanna join in too! It sounds like you guys are having fun and stuff, while I’m all alone…” You puffed out your cheeks, sadness dripping in your voice.
Both of the boys shot up to look at your somewhat downcast features, and oh, how it wreaked their hearts in one fell swoop.
Kokichi automatically shot up from his position, puffing out his chest in preparation for a new speech.
“O-ok! New deal! We ALL join evil forces TOGETHER, and absolutely destroy the game with all of our property, while reaping in the greedy rewards of the capitalist regime!” Kokichi loudly proclaimed, chuckling at the end of his new deal.
You gasped, “Deal! Deal! Taking over a money-based board game with my two favorite people ever will always be a yes for me!” You laughed, smiling at the thought of the three of you taking over Hollywood streets with a pose of limos, while using bags stuffed with pure cash as weapons made it ten times funnier.
Kokichi smiled, resting his hands behind his head, “Yeah! Let’s end it here and just say that we kicked so much millionaire ass that we now have control over the whole economy!”
. . .
This is the second problem, Kokichi is so undeniably confused. About what? About himself. He was sure as all hell about how he felt about you, he always went soft and squishy for you, and not to mention he would be extra clingy when it had to do with you. Headpats? Common, and always appreciated. Cuddles? Been there, done that with you.
But, then there was Nagito. Kokichi would never say this out loud, but he thought that Nagito was so…pretty. And god, Kokichi was a huge sucker for pretty people. Though, once he realized that his feelings didn’t go to just one person, that’s when he started to panic.
He had to take in multiple things at once, trying to accept it all at once, but it was just so incredibly difficult. He has spent the whole entirety of his life to perfect the art of lying, and one thing that he learned constantly manipulated his own mind and thought process, tearing it into metaphorical shreds.
In order to pull out a lie that everyone can believe, you have to lie to yourself, and proclaim your own illusion of your truth.
Did Kokichi want to believe he was immensely attracted to Nagito, who just happened to be a guy? No, he really didn’t. It wasn’t normal.
Did Kokichi want to believe that he had fallen so fucking in love with two of his closest friends? Hell no. In society, you had to pick and choose, it’s one or the god damn other.
Right?
One night, all of these feeling and thoughts rushed into the boy’s conscious all at once, building immense pressure within his head and chest. Was this a nightmare, or-
Suddenly, his throat started to close up on him, making him gasp out in agony, wheezing on the covers of his bed, tears brimming at the corners of his eyes.
Instinct kicked in within the speed of light. Kokichi shakily reached over to his phone, grasping onto it, and quickly set up a group call. Almost immediately, the two people he was panicking over had picked up.
“Hello? Kokichi? Is there anything you need?” A raspy voice rang out. It seems as if Nagito was awoken by the sudden calling.
“Yeah, Kichi? Is there anything wrong?” You softly spoke through the phone. It calmed Kokichi a little just hearing the two of you guy so worried over him.
“I-I know It’s out of the blue-“ Kokichi gasped for air “B-but can you guys please come over?”
And oh boy, did you and Nagito get there in record time.
After just a mere ten minutes, you and Nagito were outside of Kokichi’s bedroom door, and the both of you could hear the desperate hiccups and gasps of your poor friend.
The both of you had no doubts, nor questions. You just wanted the struggling boy to feel safe.
“We’re coming in.” You said, affirming your actions with light knocking on the bedroom door.
When the both of you came face to face with a Kokichi with puffy red eyes, clutching his heaving chest, and thick tears rolling down his face, it felt like the both of you just got shot in the heart, the weight of it sinking down into the stomach, emitting a feeling that could only be described as pure pity. But the two of you automatically got to work.
Sooner rather than later, You and Nagito were cuddling Kokichi from either side, supporting him, as well as being his shield for protecting his small, delicate frame from his own cruel thoughts. You had started to run your fingers through Kokichi’s hair, causing his breaths to become fuller, and not nearly as hitched. Nagito also wanted to contribute in his own way, so he decided to mindlessly draw messy shapes and squiggles into Kokichi’s side, hoping that what he was doing would be of any help.
After only a mere five minutes, Kokichi had passed out from exhaustion, but the two of you kept on doing what you were doing, wanting for the boy in-between you two to have sweet dreams about all of what he desires all night long.
Kokichi has never let go of that memory, and never will for the rest of his life, and it’s a constant reminder on how much he had lied to himself. He actually wanted the truth out of something for once in his life, and that was how long it would be in order for the loves of his life to live without restraint of societal chains. Whenever it was, he would always be ready. Always, with arms as open as the horizon.
. . .
“Why in the world are we watching Big Hero 6 again? Didn’t we watch this, like, a month ago?” Kokichi trudged from the microwave, to the plush couch, bowl of buttered popcorn in hand.
“(Y/N) wanted to watch it, is there a problem?” Nagito tilted his head, holding the remote, about to press play. You were bouncing in anticipation, because this movie was just never a disappointment.
“Hm, well, I GUESS there’s nothing wrong with it….just don’t be surprised when you hear me snoring.” Kokichi huddled up beside you, placing the bowl of popcorn on you lap.
“I deem you the popcorn peacemaker! Your job is to make sure no one’s being a pig.” Kokichi snickered, while you giggled at your new role in life.
“Nagi? You like popcorn, right? Here!” You placed the bowl on his lap, causing him to smile.
“Hey, HEY! NO! That means I have to reach my WHOLE ARM over to to Lucky boy, JUST SO I CAN GET SOME POPCO-“
“Sh sh sh! The movie is starting!” You giggled, shushing the purple haired boy, while you heard a little chuckle from the white haired boy who was next to you.
. . .
The last problem was you. Your heart bubbled up in joy whenever you where around these boys, making your face erupt like a volcano whenever something slightly suggestive is aimed at you when it has to do with either one of them. You liked both of them, a lot, and you gave everything in order for the three of you to flourish in bountiful friendship. Yeah, that’s the problem, it was friendship.
Oh, how desperately you wished that everything could be easy! If life were like an infinite rolling of crashing waves, things would be flawless, predictable even. Unfortunately, life really likes to give you the short end of the stick, and this was honestly one of the shortest sticks someone like you would have never asked for. The loving of two men, both equally, and having an intense desire to treat them as lovers. What would they do as lovers? Where would they go as lovers? The questions and possibilities are endless…
The only time where you felt as if the friendship could’ve resembled anything somewhat romantic, was a summer evening trip to the beach.
The water was the perfect temperature, the ocean was as clear as glass, and the sand didn’t burn the soles of your feet. The boy’s were in their swimming trunks, having their own little fun. Nagito was afraid of getting to deep into the ocean, so you always stayed in the shallow end, trying to capture as many tiny fishes as you could with your bare hands.
Kokichi insisted that him and Nagito bury you in sand, leaving your head poking out of a sandy little cocoon. When the sun started to set, you got some supplies that you brought, and lit the fire that the group planned to create. Everyone gathered around it, cooking hot dogs on sticks, and crafting tasty s’mores that we fed each other.
One could say that that night might be the most casual and platonic friend trip ever, but something was off.
Everyone looked at each other differently that night. When looking into their eyes, it was oddly intimate. It was like all of the stars in the night sky reflected off their eyes conveyed so much...love.
That night, you felt so adored, so cherished and cultivated to the brim of your existence. You felt something, and maybe the other boy’s did too, but that feeling has changed your life.
Thanks to these stupid boys; These stupid boys that you’ve given so much to, you don’t think you could ever love any other.
One you’ve helped get out of a terrible degradation cycle, another you’ve helped to not lie to himself, and not as much to others.
And thanks to your down to earth humility, your heart has been stolen, and it was going to stay taken by those lovely, unique boys who have helped you out of so many ditches, and so many of life’s cracks and dents. God, how could you not fall?
Their lives were precious to you, but you had no idea how they would feel about an actual relationship, so you’ve always been terrified. Petrified and paralyzed to the bone to ever think of what may happen if you were the cause of the fracture of the friendship. You didn’t want to ruin something that has taken so long to build, yet can be torn all down due to a selfish desire.
But, maybe, just maybe, if they went to you first, confessed everything that was bottled up inside, dittoed on how you felt…
Then you might just be the luckiest person to live on this earth, there’s no doubt about that.
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scandeniall · 3 years
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story of us
pairing: suna x reader
the story of ur relationship <3; alternatively (more) dating sunarin headcanons but this time is somewhat of an order and talks good and bad 2K+ worth lol
a/n: i had more planned but half of these have been sitting in my notes for months and its kinda fucking long already bc he lives rent free!!!
warnings: uh the usual aged up (in ur 20s time skip type beat), language, yeah
Meeting
Now when y’all met suna was not looking to love at all. That man was just living his life and so where you. The two of you pretty much meet through komori. You’re a friend and it’s his birthday so him and a few of his friends go out for drinks bc why not. Young hot pretty financially stable v-ball players. Nah no ones there for any type of hookups literally just there celebrating a great guy.
They rent out a section at a relatively nice bar tbh. Not the cheapest and you can actually hear conversation. But also not a super expensive one where the patrons are middle aged with jazz music and the occasional track to relive “youth.” Komori’s a sweetie and will come outside to get you when you text that you’re there. You’ve met washio and ofc sakusa Before so you greet them casually then you turn and there’s Suna and a few others you haven’t met.
That greeting isn’t anything special I promise. Just “hey I’m so and so” and vice versa. It’s one of those meetings where you just think “he’s cute” but it’s such a fleeting thought. Y’all don’t even really talk that first night tbh. At the next practice Suna mentions offhandedly that he didn’t know komori was dating someone and komori is like: huh? Yeah sorry. I love (Y/N) and all but were just friends. Suna just shrugs not really caring to be honest until Komori just asks what did he think of you.
“Don’t really remember much man. Seemed cool though” he didn’t think he’d really see you again. Yeah you were close enough to have been at Komori’s birthday but if that was his first time ever meeting you, he figured you weren’t from around there are present very much. Yeah he was wrong.
Suddenly you were on Komori’s snap story more often, or maybe he’d just been noticing more. Too bad he couldn’t even remember your name 💀. Then it turned into you occasionally popping up where he was. He’d been told your name at least 5 times already but wouldn’t remember it the next day. Whenever he’d see you again he’d get a strained look like: “what is this mf name again” just laugh and tell him again bby.
That changed at some random house party by another mutual friend you two apparently had? You two were the only people just around the fire pit trying to catch some warmth in the chilly night. He’s probably just on his phone head bobbing his head to the muffled music from inside. And you’re just like “remember my name yet?” All jokingly. This sparks the tiniest bit of interest in him and he lets out a low chuckle and just admits “not at all.” I also feel like this is the first time he really looks at you and he’s like 🤨, wait you’re actually kinda cute.
That night y’all just kinda talk and vibe. The conversation comes easy as you two jump back and forth from talking about the music playing to sneakers which he brings up to stuff that you like. He’s actually really easy to talk to. So easy that u can forget about him not remembering your name despite meeting several times. You mention that you’d hung around komori before while they were gaming and that he seemed pretty cool. That leads him to asking “how do you know him anyways?”
“I used to date Sakusa”
Mentally he’s just like— ‘yeah I’m not getting involved in this. Time to go.’ Until you just start laughing.
“I’m kidding. He’s not really my type. We met after being paired together for a project in school.”
The two of you spend quite a bit of time just talking that night until you are joined again by some friends and it’s deadass like y’all weren’t just talking for almost an hour straight.
Getting Together
The process of getting together is like a cat and mouse game. You two start getting closer than friends and then something happens and you’re not talking for weeks. Whether it be life just getting busy, and then someone ending up on some random tinder date or so be it. Definitely one of those things were somehow someway y’all end up just hanging on one of your couches watching a movie. At some point there’s definitely a hint of sexual tension but neither of y’all act on it (later on you find on his finsta that he used to post several “i wont you 😔” memes  Folks can’t tell if hes joking or not (hes not))
You probably gotta tell that man you like him so if that ain’t you I’m sorry. Y’all not dating 😹. It’s something casual, y’all going to pick up some snacks for a movie night and why this mf keep looking at you out the side of his eyes instead of the road. You def texting the groupchat asking if you should confess. They tell you to boss up and just do it baby.
You literally end up confessing in that parking lot. Like right when he shuts the car off and starts swinging his keys on his finger and you kinda just blurt “I like you. Like like you.” He just kinda nods before his eyes widen. “Wait are you fr?” Like no you’re joking tf. It gets a lil awkward so you just go to get out the car and he’s like “I like like you too.”
I definitely don’t think either of you ever officially asked the other out it’s just at some point the understanding that you two are a couple. Like when you’re hanging out just you two hes more touchy, and then y’all start kissing and holding hands at some point. Then when you’re with friends he almost exclusively sits next to you and your friends notice the whispers in one another’s ears at the loud bar that seem just a hint too intimate for ppl who are just friends. Then y’all start arriving and leaving places together and people just at some point get the message (it’s later confirmed by you tweeting some shit like: I hate Rin why is that mf my boyfriend)
As far as anniversaries y’all draw straws to pick a day in the ballpark of the time y’all both think you became official. That’s the day you stick with even if it’s not true.
Relationship Flaws
A fault in the relationship is sunas kinda poor communication when it comes to things that matter. How he feels. Arguments. Love sure as hell don’t come east with anyone but when your partner won’t let you in? Yeah that’s like hell. That’s something you struggle with. And then on your end, it’s the impatience with him not letting you in. You try to wrongfully rush it.
 There’s definitely been arguments that stem from him just being upset about something unrelated to the relationship then coming to you for comfort without actually telling you what’s wrong. He kinda just wants to lay with his head on his chest but at some point that’s not enough. Y’all are in a relationship and should be able to talk about your bad days too.
You’re not innocent in this issue either because sometimes it comes off too pushy. Yes it’s from a place of care but sometimes that silent comfort is necessary. The walls will break in due time and y’all both know that deep in the back of your minds But then there’s a part that’s like— yeah we can’t let this become the norm
“Rin, can you please talk to me”
He will have literally told you “whatever” and that he “can’t deal with this rn” several times as he just shrugs and is like yeah “I’m gonna just go home. I’ll text you later” with an awkward ass pat on your shoulder if it really ruined his mood. If he’s leaving before he gets super upset and uncomfortable just some half assed kiss in your cheek
Another thing is I feel like he could be passive aggressive and let’s be real other folks doing it causes you to do it to. Y’all probably drag eachother on your finstas where you can both see it lol
But when it comes to making up he cracks first and apologizes when he started it. Or as y’all get more comfy with communication. If it’s not anything major he’ll just hit you with a text like “I’m bored come hang”
More Relationship Things
I feel like he love/hates driving. Likes the ride not always driving though. So if you ever proposed a late night drive he’d be down (if you offer to drive). He does let y’all take his car though. He reclines the seat pretty far back. Alternates between just closing his eyes vibing w/ the music or kinda just looking at you (he the type of bf that makes u nervous no matter how long y’all been together)The way he looks at you makes you nervous cause that man is fine as hell and you can just feel his eyes on you.
He films you on Snapchat and sends the video to you like “you look hot”
If he’s not ‘resting his eyes’ he’s mumbling along to the music because he has the aux. if y’all music tastes are different he occasionally throws in something you really like bc he likes how you perk up at one of your fav songs
Moving on. Y’all dap eachother up after s3x because it’s “modern romance” (boy stfu). You two came up with a sex playlist together and it’s on both of your phones. Sometimes one of you will add a troll song that the other doesn’t know and put it in the lineup. (Stole my heart by 1D has definitely played before and you were practically in tears laughing at his reaction. That was one of those songs he was like ‘yeah alright i think we’re done).
At some point you two develop your own handshake and it’s cute. Whenever either of you have to travel without the other that’s always the last thing you do before you leave eachother. There’s vids of your friends daring y’all to do your elaborate ass handshake drunk and doesn’t matter what’s in your system, you both know it like the back of your hand.
I think he values quality time a lot so there’s so many nights where you’re both just chilling in his room just doing your own things. He could just be at his desk watching some game highlights and you’re just doing hw on his bed with your own earbuds in work all spread out and he’s content. He’s also attentive so if he calculates that you’ve been working too long he’ll just take ur earbud like “hey let’s go get something to eat.”
People definitely think he’s the lazy one in the relationship but it’s 100% not true. Like stated above, he’s very attentive and can pretty much gauge how you’re feeling in the blink of an eye. He knows when you need alone time but won’t go without reassuring you that he’s here whenever you’re ready. When you do just need him he’s there without a second thought. If you’re more touchy he’ll have your head in his lap his arm running up and down your as you tell him what’s wrong. He knows when to joke about a minor inconvenience and over the course of your relationship knows when to cut the jokes and be serious with you.
He’d never admit it but he knows your coffee order by heart (he keeps up his image my asking wtf do you get everytime. Just let him LOL). He the type to peek at what you plan on wearing and ‘accidentally’ color coordinate then pull some shit like “why are you copying me”
Y’all def shit talk together. See someone doing something completely out of pocket in public— straight to ur phones you go (pack it up shade room). To the public it just looks like you aren’t paying any attention to one another on your dates but y’all are. Just over the phone so u don’t piss off ur target 😌
Y’all are very comfy in your relationship that you just say stuff. Y’all don’t even think.
“Rin, what if i crashed us in this car rn 😹”
“Do it. Might be fun”
When you two finally move in together it’s almost like how your relationship starts. Slowly more and more spares of stuff for you end up at his. He does sorta make the move near the end of your lease and is just like “you’re here more than me anyways.” (hes nervous but swears he’s not. Bby you’re literally shaking). Him moving you in is like hell. This mf takes sooooo long to help with boxes. Picks up 1 then sits for like 15 minutes. You ask for help the first few times and he’s just like “I got you” while continuing to scroll his phone.
Sleepy Shoulder kisses in the mornings. Only form a greeting you get but it’s ok
this is like my 100th dating suna hc and im still going this is SICK. it was so hard to not drop old refs bc i still believe in them 100% yes i do!!!!
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fourangers · 3 years
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Hi Fourangers,
First of all, I love your blog so much. It's like going through a history back when Naruto Manga chapters were released weekly and your reviews were so Golden, Hilarious and spot-on. Am a new fan though (especially an SNS fan), I just got into this fandom only this year. I don't know if you'll answer my ask, but I just wanted to try and ask you few questions and I pray that you might answer me....
1. Since you've written in a post that you were active in the eastern part of the fandom, How was chapter 698 received in Japan? Because this is the chapter I inherently realized they both love each other. Yeah, I was too late but somehow whenever they interact with each other in previous chapters I always find them to be 'Weird' for just to be friends. Chapter 698 is just blatantly obvious that they love each other. Considering Homophobia and Shounen genre, I have no idea how it was perceived over there back then in 2014.
2. Which scene made you to ship SNS?
3. As an SNS'er how do you feel about the ending, where everyone was married off when they were just 19 just to make some shitty sequel??? As a new fan, I felt betrayed and It would've been perfect if they had stopped at chapter 699, leaving an open ending.
4. How do you face with the accusation about Naruto and Sasuke as brothers and we, SNS'ers are Incest shippers??? I don't care about that Indra and Ashura thing. But Naruto himself told he considers Sasuke as his Brother couple of times. And in Chapter 699, Sasuke acknowledged, 'He finally understood what it meant'.... It's the only thing that confuses me and I don't even have an answer!!! Plus, Kishi himself gave an interview that he based Sasuke on his Brother... I really wonder how he gave such an interview when he literally made them wear necklaces with each other's faces.
5. How was Naruto and Sasuke's sexuality perceived in the fandom back then??? Man!! Kishimoto just made lot of comic reliefs on their sexuality by making Sasuke on Sai jutsu, Naruto not interested in Icha Icha but making Reverse Harem no Jutsu, Naruto was angry when Konohamaru made Boy on Boy jutsu whereas he had no problem with him doing it. LOL. And all those homoerotic posters. What do you think about their sexuality, personally??
6. Why did Kishi had to develop their bond as Soulmates with some unintentional or intentional romantic undertones, if he was eventually going to pair them up with girls??? He easily could've gave many such romantic tropes to other girls and keep the bond between N and S as purely friendship or brothers. It still would've made sense.
7. Final one, Was Naruto really Nosebleeding when Kurama made a joke about Sasuke's kiss in Chapter 572???? We had a lot of heated discussion with other shippers where they claim that it was just a splotch of snot.
Sorry for the lengthy ask....... I am so eager to know your answers and I don't want to spam your ask box by sending multiple asks.
Thanks 😊😊😊
Hey yo! Welcome new SNS fan! I'm so glad that you joined us and I'll try to answer as best as I can. I'm not very active here on tumblr (except browsing lol) but your ask was such a delight to read.
1. I honestly don't remember. I think I didn't follow the japanese boards until the eventual 699-700 disaster. People were craving for reactions and I was curious about it too lol. And well...it's been years, I doubt I'll be able to find the reactions from that time. Imo, most readers don't care much about pairings, they just wanted to read about power-ups and abilities and the basic Naruto Vs Sasuke. Though there are some backhanded jokes about how gay Naruto is for Sasuke.
2. Hah. It's going to be very anti-climatic but it was when Naruto and Sakura were eating in Ichiraku Ramen. Naruto just used Rasenshuriken against Kakuzu and he busted his arm. Sakura was healing his arm and her attention was focused on Naruto. I used to be a NaruSaku shipper so I thought "Oh hey! This is the moment that Naruto would have a candid romantic moment!" But nope. He talked about Sasuke. And I was already getting suspicious about Sasuke's feelings towards Naruto ya know? And the whole "SASUKE IS MIINEEEEEE" in Orochimaru's lair. It was that moment I thought "you only have Sasuke in your head don't you, Naruto?" and started shipping SNS.
3. Hooo boy was I surprised when it was suddenly revealed that they had the basic heteronormative, boring marriage with bunch of clones of themselves. Everyone thought that it was almost like a bad fanfiction come true and some thought that it was fake. It was a pandemonium lolololol. I also thought that it was too lame to be true and lo and behold, when it came true I was floored. And then whenever Kishimoto threw new material, I got insanely pissed off because S*arada and B*ruto becoming pairing material is ok because they are a girl and a boy, and then they paralleled with Naruto and Sasuke which are only FRIENDS because they are both men. ARGH. Open ending was what Kishimoto planned from the very beginning but wrote a sequel to earn more money.
In that aspect, I made peace with it because of the whole anime/manga industry. I learned that, as a mangaka, you don't earn a lot of money with selling books, but rather with merchandise and profiting with sales right. And that guy have a family to raise, have two kids (which is hilarious about how B*ruto movie is his self-insert story), he needs a steady income. Also, I read reports about how anime studios are so poor and animators don't receive a decent income not to mention they are overstaffed and tired, and B*ruto is a good money cow for them to earn money so they can invest later on other anime they have more passion about it. So even though I hate this story with a strength of thousands suns, they are putting meal on people's tables and making them pay rents. I'm ok.
4. Lemme roll my eyes because in the Last movie they said that Hinata is related to Kaguya and so is the Uzumaki and Uchiha clan so they are all related woo hoo. But in the aspect of brothers because reincarnations bla bla bla, didn't Naruto himself said that he's no longer that brother, he's himself? Hmm...I gotta re-read it. One day. Maybe. lol. But I'm sure that he said "Sasuke is not my brother but I'm sure we'll understand well as friends" so there. Honestly, there are a lot of interviews out there and a lot of them are fake, so I'd always take the interviews with a grain of salt lololol. I do know from artbooks that Kishimoto wanted to create Sasuke as a rival-esque character and that was it. As he was developing Sasuke and Naruto's relationship, since he liked the whole yin-yang concept, whenever he wrote Naruto's story, Sasuke's was developed at the same time as his shadow.
5. I can tell from Naruto Forums (I used to participate back in that day) MOST of the non-shippers thought it was gay as hell, but you know...it was a relic of that time. While they thought it was gay, they didn't put too much thought about you know? Because it was shounen, and we knew that it was a joke that it couldn't be taken seriously. Of course, in the SNS fandom, we did make more analysis and there were a lot of instance when Naruto and Sasuke's sexuality was questioned. Some other non-shippers also thought that Naruto was totes gay for Sasuke (including a IRL friend).
Imo, Naruto is definitely bisexual in my view. Sasuke I think he's asexual or gay. He's attracted to Naruto, but mostly because of his connection to him, not because of his physical attributes, so yeah...asexual. Or Pansexual. Sasuke is more complicated lmao. Imo, Naruto could be pansexual too, come to think about it. Yeah, I guess both being pansexual can be valid.
6. He developed Naruto and Sasuke being soulmates from the very beginning, that was proven in his comments in artbooks and in the manga. He probably created with the intention of making it purely platonic, going beyond physical ties. Then he shot himself on the foot by drawing Naruto thinking about Sasuke on bed, talking about how Sasuke is cool, meanwhile Sasuke waxing poetic about how Naruto saved him. What gives? Lol. Yeah, I think he got too enamored writing their relationship that he didn't have time to write romantic ones. What I noticed that Sakura's popularity never was really high, so I could see some editors putting their fingers all over it and making her less relevant. Also, Kishimoto didn't know how to handle her, so when she got her time to shine was the whole fake confession disaster. Coupled with Kishimoto sexism and, in his words (Kurenai's flashback), women are useful to spout more babies, women was never really relevant in his story, unfortunately. Even Kaguya who was technically the big bad boss, was never really fleshed out in comparison to Madara. So the null het romantic moments it's not because he wanted to elevate SNS moments, it's more about how he's incompetent about it. It's either Hinata slowly elevating to a relevant status because forced interaction (Pain's sacrifice and Neji's death) or Sakura being obligated to be pining over Sasuke because she's a girl. It's even more painful to see that, if we ignore B*ruto, both girls are shown to be just talking with their kids and dusting shelves, basically being housewives, even though thorough the story (especially Sakura) it was implied that both of them have much more potential than being their husband accessories.
7. It was a splotch of snot. I can confirm myself lol. Whenever the chapter is out and fans would scan it to scanlate it, the editor usually would amp up contrast to max. So usually the lines get much more thicker than usual, when you read the official release which gets straight from the source, you can notice how the lines are more delicate.
Oh lol...but then we also have a lot of controversy about translating style. THAT one is a whole new can of worms to open.
Man I had fun answering your questions! Please send more :P
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450 Followers: Meet The Writer
Hello there! We’re back with another Meet The Writer Q&A and it’s our pleasure to introduce a fellow Brazilian fanfic author for our ninth interview:
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Blog: @julia-highstorms​ Name (or petname): Julia/Ju Birthday: July 9 Nationality: Brazilian 🇧🇷 Current residency: I'm one of the 12 million people living in São Paulo, Brazil Languages you speak: Brazilian Portuguese, English and a bit of Japanese Masterlist: Julia’s choices fanfiction masterlist
1. Is there a meaning behind your url name? Yes! For those who have been following me for a while, they already know that I used to change my URL according to the Choices character I was stanning at the time but it was a PAIN to fix all my fanfics links 😩 so I decided to finally create an unique URL that I wouldn't get tired of. So I mixed my two surnames together and it (basically) means Highstorms. I loved it 😌
2. When did you start playing Choices? What's the first book you played? 2017 I believe. TRR book 1 was about to debut. YEAH. It was the Freshman Book 1.
3. When did you decide to join Choices fandom? December 21 2017. ILITW was in its last chapters and I was obsessed with it. I wanted to talk about it with other people, but I didn't know anyone who also played Choices. So I found the fandom on Tumblr and decided to join. I miss all my friends I made back then and we all went nuts with ILITW finale together 😩 Good times
4. Go back to your archive and tell us what was your first post on your Choices blog was about. My first post was about how I loved ILITW and how everyone was fucked up sjddndossok also a lot of reblogs about MAKE NOAH AN LI 🗣️
5. How long have you been writing fanfiction? I started writing fanfictions in my senior year of high school, although I attempted to write my own stories when I was younger, around 12-13.
6. Share the first fanfic you wrote with us. Do you still like it or would you change anything about it? My first fanfic ever is about The Maine, it was my favorite band back then slfjdfodj but my first Choices fanfic is If Jane Was Here (ILITW told by Noah) Chapter 1. I AM SO PROUD OF IT. Of course, there are some things I would change. Like adding even more angst. Having finished writing it way sooner. But I'm super proud of it overall. My first (and so far only) Choices long series I've ever finished. Wow.
7. What are your favorite Choices books to write about? Definitely Open Heart just because of Bryce Lahela and Rei (my MC). OPH has become a mess, but I love Bryce too much. I loved the It Lives anthology too and enjoyed writing about. And I'm hyped for my upcoming Blades AU series!
8. What is your specialty as a fanfic writer? Oooh I guess it is rewriting certain scenes or events of the books or thinking about AUs. Since ILITW I have enjoyed doing this. Writing on another character's point of view of the events that have happened (the whole If Jane Was Here series, that is ILITW told by Noah's POV). Or adding some depth to a certain scene (did something like this with Julia, my ILB MC, and Tom's relationship. And with Rei and Bryce's). Or even rewriting the story to fit better with my MC's personality (Rei, OPH MC).
9. What aspect of your writing do you most enjoy to see praised? When people say they like my MC's, Rei (OPH MC) and Luxia (Blades MC). Before, whenever I played Choices, I didn't care much about the MCs because they're all generic (which makes sense because we're the ones playing it). They're always the happy go lucky friend that tries to fix everyone's problems and every LI is in love with them. Boooooring. Rei was my first MC that I created a whole non-canon personality to her, and that's why she's my baby 🥺 and when people commented that they felt represented by Rei, that she felt more realistic than PB's usual MC, well, that was my peak as a writer lol so they're basically OC's, with their own personalities and temperaments.
10. Do you participate in any writing events or challenges throughout the year? If so, what do you like about them? I do, but I wish I could participate more often! The prompts are what I like the most, because they give me ideas that I'd have never thought to write about before.
11. Are there any writers (published authors and/or fanfic writers) who influenced your writing? Meg Cabot was my favorite author growing up and I read some of Sophie Kinsella’s books too, so probably my love for adding a bit of comedy, silly little things in my fanfics came from them. I love Jane Austen too. And last but not least, my flair for angst definitely came from reading Fruits Basket, my favorite manga ever. There’s so much angst in Furuba dodksdishd Takaya Natsuki-sensei really enjoys it. I recommend reading her other manga series, Twinkle Stars, too.
12. What element of writing do you struggle with most? Actually writing lmao. You know, taking the plot out of my mind and typing it down on Google Docs. Writing is hard, takes too much time and I'm lazy 😩 I wish I could just transfer my ideas to a document and it's done. No need to write, no need to revise, etc. I love the final product, but I hate the process.
13. Do you have any abandoned WIPs? What made you abandon them? A BUNCH OAJDSKDKD 🤦 Either because my inspiration to write it has faded or because I don't want to spend my whole time writing.
14. You’re applying for the fanfic writer of the year award. What five fanfics do you put in your portfolio? Oooooh great question! I must put:
If Jane Was Here - Alternative ending (ILITW): this is the only finale I accept sorrynotsorry
Too Little Too Late - Jax x MC (Bloodbound): I wanted to feel hurt. People cried. I loved it sclkdsdjsops
The Loudest One - Bryce x F!MC (Open Heart): I wrote this one for CFWC Kinktober! And honestly, this is the best smut scene I have written. I’m quite proud about it.
Satisfied - Jax x Lily (Bloodbound): it was fun writing for my crack ship! My babies. And the first smut scene I have ever written. I’m glad it was with these two. I still can’t get over the fact that either one of them dies in BB’s finale. I cannot accept skfjdpd
Lullaby - Tyril x Elf!F!MC (Blades): don’t get me wrong, I love Tyril and his goth lordling mysterious elf boy personality and the first time he and MC made out was HOT but… I missed a bit of clousure before, you know? It felt a bit sudden to me, so I wrote a couple of fanfics showing their growing interest and attraction towards one another. This one is a light cute one and I really like it.
15. Do you create original content aside from fanfiction (original stories, art, etc)?  I sometimes draw some fanarts in which you can see by searching for #occasional drawings on my Tumblr.
Do you want to contribute with questions/ideas for the next Meet The Writer Q&A? Send us a message.
Thanks for reading! Reblog to share your appreciation for @julia-highstorms​ ❤️
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from-home · 3 years
Text
𑁍 MARK LEE┊ 𝒔𝒊𝒙𝒕𝒚 𝒔𝒆𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒅𝒔, 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒕 / one ˎˊ˗
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𑁍 summary : the one where mark lee time travels back and forth throughout the past and future with his crush, (y/n) ˎˊ˗
𑁍 pairing : mark lee x older!reader (by like three years lmao) ˎˊ˗
𑁍 word count : 6.7k ˎˊ˗
𑁍 genre : fluff, comedy (i hope??), minimal angst, time travel!au ˎˊ˗
𑁍 warnings : swearing, unrequited love (i know that shit hurts omg), my humour is ass, mark gives me slight second hand embarrassment in this, bad writing??, i gave up like halfway through this lol, first time writing a fic like this pls have mercy, it’s almost 2:30 am i'm too tired to proof read fuck ˎˊ˗
𑁍 a/n : first chapter of my first ever fic on here hehe - idk when the next chapter might come tbh but hopefully i’ll continue this series for my own enjoyment! in the meantime, uni still kicks my ass >:(( but anyway, enjoy and i hope that at least someone will find joy with this!    ˎˊ˗
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[ 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟬 : 𝗗𝗔𝗬 𝟬 ]
when your pastor dad’s best friend was the biggest nerd in high school and became an eccentric scientist
O lovely Pussy! O Pussy, my love,
  What a beautiful Pussy you are,
       You are,
       You are!
What a beautiful Pussy you are!
      If he could write like that, maybe Mark wouldn't need to be here in this boring literature class of his. Don't get him wrong, he liked writing, and he liked the way he could express his emotions through a pen and paper. But for the twenty-one-year-old boy who could barely sit still in one place without his mind wandering off into four different dimensions, it was hard to be interested in whatever the professor was rambling on about. Maybe Professor Jung was telling the story of how she met Dylan Thomas' widow's sister's friend's cousin, and how much of an artistic impact it had on her. She had told the story a good three times in the past two months - Mark kept count.
      Yeah, writing was fun and all, but literature class specifically was boring and dull to him. "Oh but Mark, why take this course then?" one might ask. But one should also know that it was a necessary course if Mark wanted to earn his oh-so-coveted diploma.
      Curse him for majoring in creative writing. His dad always did wonder why writers even bother writing when the bible exists.
      But maybe one day, an hour and a half of John Keats would produce him some ideas for a romantic poem that he could write and gift off to his love of seven years... and counting.
      (Y/N), the shiniest of all pearls and the most beautiful of all Mona Lisa's, the older woman and her beauty often left Mark stunned and helplessly in love. He first met her when he was fourteen, when she had been introduced as his seventeen-year-old tutor. She was so pretty back then, and still was now. In fact, it was as if she didn't age at all!
      Someone who resembled a goddess like (Y/N)  deserved only the most romantic of all romantic poems, and Mark Lee made it a mission to be the one to write it for her. He was so helplessly in love with her that he was able to channel his feelings for her into five different written forms: poems, song lyrics, an 'A for effort?' drawing of her, letters, and anonymous blog posts about how "unrequited love hurts".
      Sure, those blog posts were anonymous, but as good as Mark thought he was at hiding his feelings for her, everybody in town and their ancestors' spirits knew about the big crush Mark had on her. But no one bothered to tell (Y/N) about her not-so-secret admirer and nobody bothered to let Mark know that his mysterious crush wasn’t as well-kept to himself as he thought it was.
      But it was cute. Not the part where Mark slowly died on the inside as each day passed without his feelings being returned (that was pretty sad, everybody acknowledged), but the part where the adoration in his eyes were so clear for (Y/N). Legend went that he held stars in his eyes whenever his gaze rested on the older woman - like, actual stars from the galaxy. Or so the first-hand accounts go.
      Mark Lee was a talented and hardworking boy, that much was a shared sentiment by everybody in town. He excelled at all subjects, mowed the lawn twice just because he thought he missed a spot, gave it his all at church every Sunday by rapping and dancing in the name of Jesus Christ until he was reduced to sweat and threatening to rip his dress shirt off - he was a jack of all trades. There were even rumours that whenever it was time for a 'Make a Wish' patient to... make a wish in heaven, he would dress up as Spiderman and visit them in the hospital to make their final dreams come true. So maybe that's why it was so endearing, his one-sided love for his noona. If there was one person who could jump over that hurdle of "just friends" and out of the friend zone, it had to be Mark, the boy who's always gave it his all in everything ever since he moved here from Canada when he was twelve. It was one thing to have this crush that you desperately wanted to be returned, but it was another to have the whole town cheering for you - it said a lot about Mark's character.
      Which is why! There was no other perfect test subject for Scientist Kim, the local eccentric scientist who was obsessed with creating his "next big invention". He also happened to be the best friend of the town's pastor (weird combination, everybody knows), courtesy of their high school days and a misunderstanding over a carton of milk. The town's pastor also oh-so-coincidentally happened to be Mark's father, who had lived in Korea for all his life until he moved to Canada so his wife could give birth to baby Mark. He ended up moving back to his hometown, however, thus creating a new relationship between his best friend and son.
      Now Scientist Kim - who liked to go by "Cabbage" as a homage to his idol, Charles Babbage - didn’t really care about Mark's painful one-sided love, but he knew the boy could never say no to his father's best friend from high school, so there was no one better to try out his experiments and inventions than Mark. Like, there was literally no one else at all - the whole town swore Cabbage was out of his mind and were still waiting for the day the newspaper would come out with a headline that he's been charged with involuntary manslaughter. Everybody would be disappointed, but not surprised. But such an incident hadn’t happened yet, so for now, Cabbage was still freely working hard everyday to successfully complete and unveil the invention that would propel him to "the front page of every science magazine and a Nobel Prize in Physics".
      And it just so happened to be today, October 30th 2020, when Mark received a phone call from his dad's best friend in the middle of class. He was glad he kept his phone on vibrate, but god, was it distracting. To answer or not to? Why now of all times? Right, he forgot that some people don't have anything else to do with their lives other than... creating things that usually end up on fire by the end of it. You know, now that he thought back on it, the last time Mark willingly participated in Cabbage's experiment which involved some tinfoil, antennas, and laser beam machining, it left Mark's right shoe on fire - thank God he had brought a fire extinguisher over to Cabbage’s house with him.
      Just that memory alone convinced Mark to ignore the call, nearly forgetting about it once it had stopped ringing if not for the fact he received another call just seconds later. "What is this, an infatuation?" Mark grumbled to himself, before glancing up at the front to see if Professor Jung was distracted enough for him to take this call without her noticing. It didn't help that he sat three rows away from the front. But she still seemed to be rambling on about how much she loved Dylan Thomas' works, and that was a sign for him to accept the call. He kept his voice to a hushed whisper, however, "Hello-"
      "Mark! You have to come over!" There was no way Professor Jung did not hear that screech that came from his phone. He glanced up nervously, noticing his classmate's startled gazes on him. But his eyes wandered over to the front, and judging by how Professor Jung was now going on about Dylan Thomas' "attractive appearance", it seemed he was in the safe for now.
      "Cabbage, I'm in class, so could you keep it down?" Mark hissed quietly into the phone.
      "Right, right, sorry!" While he was still loud even after lowering his voice down, it was more than quiet enough for Professor Jung not to notice, thankfully. "Mark, I've just completed my latest invention. But this isn't just any invention, it's the invention of both my - and everybody's dreams!"
      Mark would be mildly curious if not for the fact that Cabbage said that about every invention of his, but he figured that his dad was going to urge him to go anyway, even if Mark didn’t want to. "But he's my best friend, Mark!" Jeez, because how could he possibly say no to the power of friendship?
      "Mark? Boy? You still there?" Cabbage’s voice pulled Mark out of his thoughts, and the boy could do nothing but sigh. This was just going to be like every other time - he’d be introduced to some machine that supposedly did one thing, said machine would catch on fire the next minute, and it would all result in Mark going home an hour later.
      "Fine, I'll be there. After class in like, half an hour." Mark reassured the scientist, and he swore, he could hear something catching on fire in the background.
      "Great!" He then heard rushed footsteps and... a fire extinguisher? "See you then!" And the call ended.
      He just couldn’t wait.
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       When visitors would come to the humble town of Uicheon (의천), located just thirty minutes away by car from the bustling capital city, Seoul, the first thing they would notice was how much the town gave off Suburban American vibes, like walking through a town where the main characters of some random Disney high school movie lived. All single detached houses, varying in style from Country French to Cape Cod with recent contemporary and modern upgrades to those houses by residents who wanted to "spice it up".
        Uicheon was a town seen by others where most of the population was upper-middle class. There was nothing wrong with that at all, and actually, the residents of Uicheon were both happy and welcoming of anybody and anyone who stepped foot into town or even took an interest in moving, no matter of their social or economic status.
       If anything, the residents of Uicheon - the ones who've lived in the town for longer than ten years at least - were often worried that those who did show interest of moving in inevitably get... scared off. By one particular daunting house.
       It was a beautiful town. No seriously, Uicheon had been mentioned on multiple "Top 5 beautiful towns just outside of Seoul that you should visit!" lists published on the internet. And in the beautiful small town where all the houses provide comfort and beauty, surrounded by flowers on nearly every available patch of grass like something straight out of a magazine, there stood a modern house - the only completely modern house in the town - its exterior all... black. Even the big windows were tinted black, and it was obvious that the house stuck out like a sore thumb. Sometimes, the local kids told stories of how the house was abandoned, and was home to a ghost with a vengeful spirit inside who wanted to steal your teeth. The residents of Uicheon had gotten used to the house's presence already, but it didn’t stop the mutual sentiment of "...really?" amongst them.
       And currently, Mark stood in front of its black front doors, ringing the black doorbell and covering his ears as trumpets echoed from inside the house, playing to the tune of the guitar solo of Gun N' Roses' 'Sweet Child O' Mine.' Only seconds later, did the door swing open, revealing a robot, half of Mark's height. "SCANNING FACE... HELLO M-A-R-K, MARK." It greeted, well, robotically.
       "Hey, Edison," Mark greeted the robot nonchalantly, walking in and shutting the door behind him, "where's Cabbage?" He asked as he took off his shoes and placed it on the nearby shoe rack.
       "LOCATING THE DOCTOR..." Edison's eyes turned yellow, colour blinking repeatedly until it turned into a green light and stayed like that. "DOCTOR LOCATED - HE IS IN HIS LABORATORY DOWNSTAIRS."
       Because was it really surprising that the house belonged to a guy who invented things for a living and went by the name of a vegetable in a bizarre way to honour his idol?
       "Got it, I'll go meet up with him then." Mark informed, heading down the hall until he reached the black spiral staircase that led both to the third floor and bottom floor. It was really nice up there on the third floor though; Mark had been there before and it even came with a movie room! Too bad Cabbage rarely used it because he "doesn't have time for action sequences". So Mark, being the loyal lab assistant/test subject he was, headed down instead to the bottom floor, where he was greeted by a hallway that was lined up with pictures of old men on the walls. "My inspirations!" Cabbage would say. Among them were the likes of Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison (who he named his robot after, clearly), Nikola Tesla... you got the drift.
       Regardless, Mark never stayed in the hall longer than he needed to - he wasn’t sure if portraits of old men who were dead by now staring at him was exactly his kind of vibe.
       At the very end of the hall, all that awaited him was a grey metallic door that had some vapour seeping through the narrow space at the bottom of it. "Shit, I didn't bring a fire extinguisher today..." Mark cursed, grabbing onto the straps of his backpacks and readjusting it on his shoulders. "It's okay, Mark. He hasn't killed you before, so he can't kill you today...?" He wasn’t sure what the logic behind that thought was but you couldn’t blame him for trying to... reassure himself for whatever was about to come beyond those doors. It was funny to him; he had been the lab rat of many of Cabbage's crazy experiments and inventions, yet he kept coming back and every time he did, the jitters were always there.
       Maybe it wasn’t because he was scared of death. Because he wasn’t - his father always drilled the idea into his head that God would welcome him with open arms when the time came. At the very least, if Mark died - most likely because of one of these experiments and inventions - he'd be bringing Cabbage with him. But hey, that was beyond the point.
       If not the fear of death, then what? Maybe, just maybe... one of these days, one of Cabbage's revolutionary inventions would actually be successful. That for all of the craziness that's going on inside the mad scientist's head, it would finally pay off.
       If only he knew when.
       Mark reached for the handle and twisted it, pulling the door open and nearly coughing when a whole cloud of mist and vapour rushed at him. "Jeez, Cabbage, what are you doing this time?" Mark coughed into his arm as he took a step into the laboratory. He actually couldn't see the scientist at first, waving his hand around in hopes that he'd be able to swat away the mist and vapour. The space around him eventually did clear, though, revealing...
       Nothing?
       Instead of the usual grand machine that looked like it was taped together, Mark was greeted with... a clear space. The scientist was over at his desk just up a set of stairs that led to a second floor within the big room. "Cabbage!" Mark called after him, waving his hands to get his attention.
       Whatever the scientist was busy doing, it was important enough to leave Mark ignored for a good five seconds. It left him pouting, though the scientist eventually did glance over at the boy, his eyes widening behind his circular glasses. "Mark, boy, there you are!" Cabbage sprang out of his seat, quickly rushing down to the boy he had called over. He held some sort of watch in his hands, like it was the most precious thing in the world. Jeez, since when did Cabbage wear Rolex? "Took you long enough! I was bouncing in my seat waiting for you to come over! But in the meantime, I was able to complete another one after confirming my calculations for the twenty-seventh time..."
       One thing that nobody wanted to do was sit through Cabbage's rambling, prompting Mark to speak up. "Whoa, calm down, Cabbage. What's going on? Where's your invention?"
       "Oh Mark, you're looking at it." Cabbage held out the watch and Mark raised an eyebrow.
       "That small thing?" Mark narrowed his eyes at the watch in the scientist's hand. "Are you sure? Last time I came in for one of your creations, it was twice my size and almost killed me." But knowing the kind of person Cabbage was, Mark wouldn't be too surprised if this little watch managed to wreck havoc as well. How ironic it would be, for something so small to cause so much chaos.
       Cabbage shook his head, meeting Mark's gaze with oddly serious eyes. "Mark, the creation I hold in my hand can - and will - change the world. If left in the wrong hands, everything could collapse. Society will crumble, the universe will be left in a never-ending stream of terror, reality will no longer exist, the concept of time will-"
       "Okay, okay," Mark was left, once again, trying to calm down the frantic scientist, "Cabbage, deep breaths. Tell me, what did you create?" It couldn't be that bad that it left the older man going on some admittedly fear-inducing rant.
       "A time travel machine."
       One Mississippi, two Mississippi...
       "Alright, I'll see you next time then, Cabbage." And almost immediately, Mark turned on his heel, prepared to just dip out of there.
       "Wait, no, Mark!" The scientist called after the boy, grabbing a hold of his sleeve, "Please, hear me out!"
       "Time travel, Cabbage!" Mark whirled around, disbelief painted in his features. "Do you even hear yourself right now? That's impossible! This is impossible! Listen, I'm fine with being your test subject but even I have to put my foot down somewhere when things get a bit too crazy!"
       Despite Mark's reasonable concerns, Cabbage really didn't feel like letting his lab assistant slip away from the tip of his fingers, especially now of all times. "Come on, Mark! Twenty-seven times! I checked my calculations twenty-seven times! Don't let my hard work go down the drain!"
       "Then do it yourself! Time travel yourself!" Mark exclaimed.
       "I can't! I need you to go so I can stay behind and collect all the data while making sure you don't get stuck in the future or something!" Cabbage explained.
       Unfortunately, Mark's face still showed utter disbelief. "You know, this really doesn't help your case, Cabbage!"
       "Fine! We'll do this the fair way then!" Cabbage shouted, holding his fist out.
       "Are you serious? Rock, paper, scissors?!" Mark cried out, covering his eyes. If there was one thing he couldn't say no to, it was rock, paper, scissors. Why? Maybe because he boasts a seven-hundred-fifty-two win record, with a mere twenty-one losses in the game. As you could probably assume, Mark was the undisputed rock, paper, scissors king in Uicheon, and only two kinds of people would dare challenge him in the game when it came to bets. Those who were bold and those who were desperate.
       "I mean it, Mark! If you win, you can walk right out that door and never look back. I won't force this onto you. But if I win..." If Cabbage won, "you have to at least give this experiment a thought."
       "Wait, that's it?" Mark uncovered his eyes, surprise in his voice. But hey, it wasn't a bad deal at all - in fact, the opposite. If Mark won - which he was pretty much guaranteed to - he could leave. If he didn't, he could pretend he thought it over and just say no in the end. "Well shit, say no more, Cabbage." And out Mark's fist went. “On shoot?”
       "On shoot." The scientist confirmed, the two men placing their fists behind their backs.
       "Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!"
       Rock for Mark, and... rock for Cabbage.
       "You got lucky." Mark rolled his shoulders back. "But this is it." And back their fists went behind them.
       "Rock, paper, scissors... shoot!!"
       Scissors for Mark, and... rock for Cabbage.
       "I won..." Cabbage glanced down at his fist, mouth left agape, "I-I won! Against you!"
       Yikes, better make that record seven-hundred-fifty-two wins to twenty-two losses now.
       "I-I..." Mark was still in disbelief, for a totally different reason now, however. "I... I lost?" Under such circumstances too... but seriously! Time travel was a bit too much! "H-Hey, that doesn't mean I'm going to be going through with this! Remember, you said if you won, you'd let me think about it!" Mark reminded.
       "Yeah, but only because I didn't think I'd actually win!" Cabbage snorted, shaking his head as he tucked the watch safely in the pocket of his white lab coat. "But I am a man of my word, so I'll give you some time to think about it. How about until the end of the day?" He suggested.
       "That's a bit too soon, don't you think?" Mark frowned, not really liking the idea of being forced into a decision so quickly.
       "Sorry, is that loser talk?" God, that damn Cabbage always knew how to get under Mark's skin.
       "Fine, by the end of the day. But don't be surprised if my answer doesn't change." Mark warned. "Now if that's it, I'll be going." Mark huffed, turning around and heading to the door once more. This time, the scientist let him go, but not without some parting words.
       "See you soon, Mark."
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       (Y/N) doesn't know where her life went wrong.
       Okay, maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration and a dramatic one as well, but it didn't change the fact that instead of living out in the city and pursuing her dream as a world renown film director, she was stuck in her small hometown, working full-time at a film-rental store.
       What was even the point of this store anyway? Everything was online nowadays anyway - who did the owner think he was, trying to compete with Netflix?
       "One Mississippi, two Mississippi..." (Y/N) mumbled to herself from behind the counter, staring dully at the analog clock hung just above the front doors. An analog clock - what year was this again?
       "(Y/N)," the voice of the store's owner, Mr. Yoon, was a less than welcoming disruption to her daily "clock-watching" (as she termed it herself), but at least it was a good way to remind her that the day was almost over, "did the kids all go home already?"
       (Y/N) nodded, reaching below into the counter for a piece of paper with names and times. "Yup, Jungwoo and Sungchan just finished their shifts half an hour ago." She pointed to their names on the paper, "Signed out here."
       "Great. You're in charge of closing up for today then, I have business in the city." Mr. Yoon informed, proudly readjusting his grip on the handles of his briefcase.
       "Godspeed, Mr. Yoon." (Y/N) nodded, watching as the man left with a nod. And as the doors closed behind him, the female found herself alone in the store. All alone... which actually wasn't even that uncommon.
       (Y/N); twenty-four years old, graduated from a local college two years ago with a degree in Film Studies with hopes of eventually entering the field of film-making and directing. She had high hopes, especially when she graduated. "To the city and A-list I go!" She could remember cheering that day in her car, diploma in hand and graduation gown still on.
       But somebody must have forgotten to tell her that the university you went to mattered - and just how competitive the job market was for... pretty much every job.
       Now this wasn't to say the college she attended was bad or anything, it just wasn't... one of the SKY universities.  And before she knew it, when it came time for job hunting, the positions were constantly being filled out by "better candidates" and after a certain amount of "we regret to inform you"s, (Y/N) decided to go back home.
       Home, in the beautiful yet small town of Uicheon. All she wanted was to make it big, live in a nice condo in Seoul and shop at luxury brands. Yet now, she found herself wearing what was possibly a ten-year-old uniform from the back storage with a name tag that was always tilted at a forty-five degree angle no matter how many times she tried to fix it.
       But don't get her wrong! She hadn't given up yet - she absolutely would not! Her films might not be playing in theatres or at the Busan International Film Festival, but she still enjoyed writing up ideas and getting some of her co-workers to act out some scenes for her while she filmed eagerly with her trusty camcorder.
       The Sony HDR-CX675; this bad boy cost her a good two months of saving up but God, was it worth it. Jungwoo in a wig and Sungchan throwing pens like they were daggers had never looked so good in HD until (Y/N) had gotten her hands on that beloved camcorder of hers.
       "Should I film the clock or something?" She sighed, eyes wandering back over to the analog clock. At least she only had an hour left before the store closed, and she usually spent most of that time cleaning up anyway.
       And so that hour began, dreadfully long until with only ten minutes to spare, the front door had opened, prompting (Y/N) to rush back to the counter from the storage room, though not without grumbling to herself quietly about what asshole comes into a store ten minutes before they close.
       But it wasn't just anybody who came in - it was Mark, the boy who always complimented her hair no matter how lazy she had been to brush it that day. Still, flattery always earned some brownie points in (Y/N)’s books. So she wasn't hesitant at all when she had greeted Mark. "Hey, it's nice to see you here! Renting a movie?" She asked, resting her arms on the counter top.
       "Yeah, looking for some Christian-friendly Halloween movie. For the kids at church this Sunday, since Halloween is tomorrow." Mark chuckled shaking his head.
       "Let me see what I can find," (Y/N) grinned as she slipped away from the counter and to one of the shelves, "I'll be honest though, you're probably better off showing the kids some cartoon from Netflix or something."
       As if Mark was going to tell her that he insisted to his dad on renting a movie, for he wanted to see and talk to the girl of his dreams who currently had her back turned to him. "Well you know us, terrible with technology." Instead, that was all he could muster up.
       "I'll bet." She snickered jokingly, turning back to him with a movie now in her hand, "Toy Story of Terror sound good to you?"
       "Better than showing them Scream." Mark shrugged before heading back to the counter with her. "I'll pay with debit."
       "Mhm," (Y/N) nodded, taking his card and swiping it for him through the machine, "you know the usual, watch within thirty days and return it after those thirty days." She reminded him with a yawn. God forbid Mr. Yoon ever see that.
       "Busy day?" Mark offered a small sympathetic smile as he took his card back as well as the movie. "I kind of get it. Cabbage called me in for one of his inventions today."
       "Today?" She asked, watching as the boy across from her nodded. "What was it this time?" Everybody in town felt bad for Mark since he was the one always testing out Cabbage's inventions, but at the same time, at least it wasn't them?
       "Gosh, you wouldn't believe me if I said it." He shook his head with a heavy sigh. "A time travel machine - or like, a time travel watch, I guess."
       "Time travel?" The gasp from the female was expected; anybody would be surprised. "I always knew Cabbage was ambitious but definitely not to the extent of time travel!"
       "Yeah, needless to say, I said no. Or like, I told him I would think about it, you know?" Mark frowned. "I just can't believe... time travel of all things."
       "I'll be honest," there was a smile spreading on (Y/N)’s face, to the slight surprise of Mark, "the idea of time travel sounds so cool though. I'd love to try it out." When Mark had brought up what had happened at Cabbage's house, he didn't think (Y/N) would actually be... interested in the scientist's invention. Definitely not when it was so absurd. But she looked so cute, the way she stood up straighter and her attentive eyes as he talked about it. Gosh, he wished he could tell her that it wasn't worth the time. But her interest was clear, that much he couldn't ignore.
       "Then... why don't you try it in my place?" Mark suggested hesitantly. He didn't want (Y/N) and her pretty little self anywhere near those dangerous creations, for concern of her safety. But she really seemed to be interested in this, and this... it was the least he could do.
       "Alone? No thanks." She giggled softly, to the relief of the boy who had suggested it in the first place. "Maybe if someone else was with me though. Like a time travel duo!" Hold up - someone else?
       "This is your chance, Mark!" His inner voice practically screamed at him. Anything for (Y/N), right? "But it's so dangerous!" His other inner voice tried deterring him from going through with what he was about to suggest. But for (Y/N)! "Then," Mark felt his heartbeat quicken, excitement and hope visible in his eyes, "you wouldn't mind if we did it together, would you?"
       If his friends Johnny and Donghyuck were here, they'd definitely be cheering and slapping him on the back. It felt like he was asking her out, something he always dreamed of doing but never really having the guts to do so. Rejection was a scary thought, but as he watched the wide smile that spread onto (Y/N)’s face, he knew he had something to look forward to, even if through... this.
       "Of course! it'll be fun!" Score! "Too bad only one person can go though, I assume." She frowned.
       And for a second, Mark's hopes had shattered once again. But then he remembered something back at Cabbage's house, and maybe, just maybe, it wasn't over yet. "Actually, I think Cabbage mentioned making two watches." After confirming his calculations twenty-seven times. "Why don't we go together?"
       "Seriously? You wouldn't mind?" Oh, what Mark wouldn't given just to see that wide smile on (Y/N)’s face every single second of the day.
       And with a smile of his own, he nodded. "Of course not, noona."
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       Love has always been a motivation for man, ever since the beginning of humans. And as time continued on and advanced, a variety of factors had been added to that list of motivation, such as money and power. But one constant above all was always going to be love - something that had always been interpersonal.
       So that was why Cabbage wasn't too particularly surprised to see Mark come back to his house later in the evening, this time, with a female companion. And judging by the look of awe on her face, it didn't take much for the scientist to connect the dots. "Mark, you came back!" Cabbage smiled down at the boy from the second floor of his basement lab. "With a friend this time?"
       "Right," Mark cleared his throat, gesturing to the scientist, "(Y/N), this is Cabbage as you already know, and Cabbage, this is (Y/N), my friend."
       "Hi! It's great to be here! Like, really great." (Y/N) was still enamoured by the many... things going on in the lab, though Mark couldn't blame her.
       "Anyway Mark, have you given my invention a thought?" Cabbage inquired, standing up from his seat by his computer and leaning against the railing. "I assume that's why you're here, after all."
       Mark nodded. "I have." He confirmed, biting down on his lip. "And I'll do it."
       "You will?" The scientist's eyes widened, grin spreading on his face. "That's great!"
       "But," Mark began, gaze falling over onto (Y/N) for a short second before back onto the scientist, "with conditions."
       "Conditions?" Cabbage raised an eyebrow, pleasantly intrigued.
       "Conditions!" (Y/N) suddenly spoke up with a grin, earning a look from the two. "Sorry, it just felt kind of intense so I wanted to ease tensions a bit." She coughed, glancing back and forth between the two. "Please, continue." She urged.
       "A-Anyway yes, conditions." Mark cleared his throat before turning to the scientist once more. "I want (Y/N) to come with me. You have two watches, don't you?"
       "I do." Cabbage nodded, fishing his hand into the pocket of his lab coat and bringing out two identical watches. "So far, they're the only two I have so I need to make sure that your friend will be extra careful with this."
       "She will." Mark reassured without any hesitation. "I know she will, because she's (Y/N)." A man who was claiming everybody's hearts left and right - except for (Y/N)’s though, unfortunately.
       Cabbage looked as if he was pondering on the thought for a bit before eventually nodding and making his way down the stairs. "Well, if Mark is vouching for you, I guess it should be okay." Cabbage nodded before gesturing for the two to follow him to the back of the lab, where large screen rested on the wall and multiple smaller monitors on both it's sides, resting on a glass desk. Below it were multiple keyboards, a few touch pads here and there with clearly different functions. It was like something straight out of a sci-fi movie. "This is where I'll be monitoring and communicating with you two while you're in whatever time period you land in." He explained, gesturing to his set up.​​​​​​​
       "What about the watches?" (Y/N) asked.
       "I'm just getting to that." Cabbage nodded, reaching for the two watches once again. "Gather around, you two." He motioned for them to come closer. "It looks like a regular analog watch at first, but if you tap the clock face," he did what he had just said, the other two watching in awe as a small digital hologram had appeared in the air, just above the clock face, "it has information such as your battery life on the right hand corner, the date and time you're in, the option to video call me, and the option to switch time periods." He pointed out each detail on the hologram. "Now the problem with the switching time periods is that once you arrive somewhere, you're stuck there for, at a minimum, twenty-four hours before the voltage and particle energies recharge and allow you to travel elsewhere."
       "Wait, so you're staying we might be stuck in a different time for a whole day?" Mark asked, a bit of alarm evident in his voice.
       "Unfortunately, I haven't been able to find out the proper calculations to make the recharging process quicker but for the meantime... yes." The scientist sighed. "But hey, at least it's not twenty-five hours...?"
       "Cabbage!" Mark groaned, running his hand down his face.
       "I mean, twenty-four hours doesn't sound that bad." (Y/N) hummed. "I'd love to explore a different time period, really get to know what it was like!"
       "See, at least someone's optimistic." Cabbage sent a not-so-subtle look over at Mark. "But anyway, I actually have a quest for you two."
       "Ooh, a quest! I feel like I'm in a video game." (Y/N) giggled, and if it weren't for the fact that she was totally digging this right now, Mark would have just straight up left out of fear for his own safety.
       "Exactly!" Cabbage nodded eagerly. "Since you two will be going to different time periods, I want you to bring back a memento of some sort from each time period."
       "Anything specific?" Mark asked, wanting to make sure he was going into this with full details.
       "Yes, for the purpose of analytic purposes due to their high amount of energy." Cabbage turned to the two, a suddenly serious look on his face. "A meaningful item to at least one person you encounter."
​​​​​​​        The two waited for him to say more, but nope, all he did was stare back at them. Mark ended up being the first to speak up. "Hm, I think you're missing the part where you, oh I don't know, tell us what you mean by ‘meaningful item’??"
       "That will vary from person to person, Mark boy." Cabbage sighed, giving an empathetic pat on the boy's shoulder. "One person's 'meaningful item' might be a necklace that their mother gifted them, or maybe a letter from a lover for a soldier - everything in life is a variable anyway."
       "Wait, then how do we know something is a meaningful item?" (Y/N) asked.
​​​​​​​        "That's where this last function of the watches come in," Cabbage turned his attention back to the watches, "this icon," he pointed to one of the icons on the hologram screen that resembled a heart, "will allow you to scan a person once you've talked to them. This only works one person at a time though, and it does drain a lot of energy from the watch battery. It'll allow you to see particles coming from objects, like sparkles. The more vivid, bigger and brighter the particles, chances are that's your person's meaningful item. So be careful with who you choose to use it on - once you scan that person, you'll have to find their meaningful item before you can use it again. Not to mention that the longer it takes for you to find the meaningful item, the more energy it drains." He warned.
​​​​​​​        "Talk about ominous, gosh." Mark sighed, shaking his head. "I can't believe I'm doing this."
       "It'll be exciting though, Mark." (Y/N) glanced over at the boy beside her, a grin spreading on her face. "We're in this together, after all!"
       "Noona..." A shade of red coated Mark's cheeks as he stared down at her, eyes sparkling with adoration.
       "Ahem, and me too." Cabbage interrupted, "Just, I'll be back here handling everything."        
       "Yes, of course, because where would we be without you, Cabbage?" Mark sighed, feeling a bit salty over the scientist's interruption during his and (Y/N)’s "moment".
       "Love you too, Mark." Cabbage blew a kiss his way before handing a watch to Mark and (Y/N) each. "Are you two ready?"
       "Wait, we're doing this so soon?" Mark's eyes widened, staring down at the watch in his hands with a bit of fear.
       "Better sooner than later." Cabbage shrugged, helping attach the watch onto Mark's wrist and then to (Y/N)’s. "You guys will be fine, don't worry. I'm here, after all!"
       "So reassuring, Cabbage." Mark grumbled, about to protest over the quick timing and suddenness of all of this if not for the sudden feeling of warmth in one of his hands. He glanced down at said hand, eyes lingering on the smaller hand that had clasped his own. And as his eyes wandered up to the hand's owner, he swore she was going to be the death of him.
       "It'll be okay, Mark." (Y/N) squeezed his hand softly with a reassuring smile. "We're in this together." She repeated.
       "Right..." Mark trailed off before taking a deep breath and nodding. "Together." He then glanced over at the scientist. "We're ready, Cabbage."
       With an excited smile, the older man nodded before turning to his set up and taking a seat down in the chair. The sounds of his quick tapping against the keyboard keys had Mark worrying with every passing second, but as (Y/N) held his hand, he figured this wouldn't be a terrible way to die. "Adios, you two!" Cabbage called out before hitting one last button. Click!
       And as a bright and large flash of light illuminated within the lab, Mark knew it had begun, especially with the way his limbs practically burned and his consciousness struggling to stay intact.
       The things he'd do for love, huh?
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bard-llama · 3 years
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WiP List
This is gonna be looooong (like, REALLY long), so I’mma go ahead and give you a cut here. But if you’re interested in what i’m working on, take a look!
Order purely based on the order my tabs are in. I’m only counting WiPs that actually have more than a paragraph written, because if I didn’t, this list would be even longer. Also, pls don’t judge me but what I name my WiPs 😂
Post-Coital Smoke
Kinda what it sounds like tbh. I just wanted Iorveth getting high and admiring Roche’s body and then Roche decided to be a tease. At some point, I assume there will be sex.
Angst: Sex object Roche
Iorveth’s POV of realizing that Roche hurts himself whenever he flirts at Iorveth. Premise is that Roche has been groomed (intentionally or not) by Foltest to be his. So when he feels attraction towards Iorveth, he needs to be punished. And obviously Iorveth helps him learn that no, that’s not okay and idk recovery???
Midwinter Feast
This idea was 100% spawned by me trying to write holiday fics, but Foltest hosts a Midwinter Feast where they close the city for 12 days, leaving Roche to get along with the Nonhuman/Scoia’tael(ish) delegation during that time. Also, Foltest might be using the feast as a delaying tactic to resupply his army. I legit have no idea where this is going, I just thought the idea of Roche and Iorveth stuck at a feast for 12 days was funny.
Solstice Feast aka To Birth a Verdant Future
This was actually an xmas gift for @lutes-and-dandelions, but I havent finished it yet 😓 But the premise is similar to the former in that it’s another solstice feast. But it’s set post-W3 with Emhyr as Emperor throwing a party in the new conquered capital of Vizima. Roche broods a lot about Foltest’s memory and how he hates Emhyr and decides to distract himself by hanging out with Iorveth and suggesting they follow an old elven tradition. And that’s all I’ll say. XD
Next Year (Solstice Feast sequel)
Literally set the next year. This time they merge their lives by merging their people’s traditions.
Lily Preserved in Amber
Okay, haven’t gotten very far in this, but I decided it was an elven rite of passage to go searching through the forest for a sign of your future. And Iorveth finds a piece of amber with a lily preserved inside. I haven’t decided if it purely means Roche or if it means his whole family with Roche and Boussy and Anais and all. So far, he hasn’t even found the amber yet lmao. But he did just discover music!
Character taking control of the other and Character B just letting go and enjoying themselves
Under the subheading “Porn Snips”, so uh, yeah. Starts with Roche and Iorveth fighting to decide who gets to top, involves Roche getting choked, and Iorveth ripping Roche’s pants off. Oh, also, they’re currently at a fancy party hiding somewhere in the garden lmao
Based on @moonlights-ordinance‘s art
Moonlight’s working on an adorable piece where Roche leans his forehead against Iorveth’s back between his shoulderblades. I decided to make it post-W3 with both of them working as paper pushers/administrators under Emhyr’s Temeria. And Nilfgaard does not believe in chairs with backs (or, really, Emhyr wanted to see how long Roche’s pride would make him suffer. It’s a long time). The idea is to show development over time as they slowly get more comfortable with touch and start using each other as backrests. And then the sweet scene Moonlight is drawing.
Eliza for @useless-empty-brain aka Can’t We All Just Get Oolong?
Next is Iorveth’s POV, but I legit cannot figure out where to start. But we’re gonna see some of his thoughts (like how Eliza volunteered him to stay in Vizima for an unspecified period of time and he said yes even though he can’t and now has to commute regularly because he doesn’t want to miss tea with Roche but also doesn’t want Roche’s spies to catch on lmao) and his curiosity about Roche and Foltest and what Roche’s mission is (which I... totally know.)
Roche’s Scars
@moonlights-ordinance sent me a great pic of a mod for Roche where he had some pretty vicious scarring/mutilation. So of course I decided I needed to tell the story of each one. But really, it’s a story about the stages of acceptance with scars. Both Iorveth and Roche start out hiding theirs, but eventually come to reveal them comfortably in public.
Vernon Roche of the Scoia’tael aka The Value of a Man
Does my title give it away? Oops? So, this is a found family fic where Roche is captured by the Scoia’tael and the elves and dwarves slowly come to see him as - well, I was gonna say human, but as a person, I guess. And start feeling really, really guilty, especially when some not great things happen to Roche. 
Oh also, Foltest is a giant dick and uh, SPOILERS he does not try to get Roche back. Which leads to a whole subplot that will end with a found family for EVERYONE, because they all deserve to be happy dammit.
All of that was just one document lmao. I have 24 documents, some of which have quite a few WiPs in them. 😱
Kiss Prompts
24. Deep kisses where they have their hands tangled in each other’s hair to pull them closer. AKA How to Fluster an Elf
When I got the idea for How to Fluster an Elf, I decided it was gonna fill the prompt dammit. And then it really, really expanded on me.
33. An unexpected kiss that shocks the one receiving it.
Roche dreams occasionally that Iorveth visits him and watches over him and sometimes speaks, but he can’t understand Elder Speech, so he assumes it’s all gibberish.
Then he finds out it’s not and suddenly he’s not so certain it’s a dream
16. One person pouting, only to have it removed by a kiss from the other person.
Okay, I literally just need to buckle down and write some good kissing. This is set in (Im)Perfect Strangers and Iorveth is pouting about them leaving the gardens, so Roche makes it up to him.
25. Wet kisses after finding refuge from the rain.
This one won’t actually be published with the kisses ‘cause it’s porn and the rest are T-rated lol. Buuuut Roche and Iorveth are trying to have a secret liaison in the forest when the rain starts. Featuring nature magic, tentacles, and Iorveth getting filled.
Scenes from Another World (aka AU premise)
Old Men in Vergen
Set during Witcher 3, but with an established relationship. Roche comes to visit Iorveth in Vergen to ask for advice on leading an insurgency. Iorveth just wants to feed Roche while he can now that he’s not the one starving in the woods.
Language Aphasia/Deal with the Devil
I wanted to write Gaunter! So I decided that Gaunter is in a mood for some mischief (he calls it being generous) and comes upon a traveling Vernon Roche who wishes that he could be understand Iorveth. Then Iorveth’s Scoia’tael find a passed out Roche in the woods and bring him to Iorveth for judgement. Only somehow, Roche only understands Elder Speech now. He can’t understand Common at all. The Scoia’tael find this very offensive and Iorveth is mostly freaked out that someone who can do THAT was wandering around his forest.
Bunk Beds: The Portrait of Cirilla Fiona Elen Riannon
Based on a silly comic, Ciri convinces Iorveth and Roche to try to help her destroy the portrait. Geralt gets pissed and sends them to Bunk Bed Exile. Shenanigans ensue and somehow they start to get along.
Iorveth’s Scoia’tael Giving Him Shit For His Taste in Men aka The Lovestruck Fox
Right now, working on a piece from the POV of a new Scoia’tael recruit who is discovering that Iorveth’s Scoia’tael roast the fuck out of him over his crush on Roche. 
Speaking of, anyone have suggestions on prime roast material? I am not this creative.
Let’s Torture Roche!
No, really. This one is pretty dark. And told in kind of a different style than my usual, because I felt like it. So, premise is that Iorveth and Roche were a thing in the past, but then Roche was recalled to Foltest’s side and he went. So Iorveth is understandably pretty hurt and pissed (this was decided for a prompt of someone breaking down as soon as they’re behind closed doors). Buuut what he doesn’t know is that Roche is not with Foltest of his own volition. Hostages, blackmail, and torture are all involved and Foltest is a pretty horrible guy. But of course we need a happy ending, so eventually, Iorveth will rescue Roche and they get to recover together.
Life Debt aka Iorveth is an Asshole
The concept for this was that Roche saved Iorveth’s life and now that they were no longer enemies (set during Witcher 3), his honor demands that he follow Roche around until he can repay the favor. Featuring Iorveth being a trolling asshole, correcting the new Temerian Loyalist’s fighting abilities, and Roche being very, very tired. 
In application, it’s mostly angst so far, ‘cause I had to set up HOW Roche saved Iorveth’s life. And then I decided to really hurt Iorveth. But tbh I will probably skip ahead after establishing this stuff, because I just want shenanigans.
King and Country
I’ve got several WiPs for this one, including the Stripes’ recruitment, their decision to change sides, the Stripes being double agents, and of course, Iorveth and Roche’s developing relationship. But hey, I’ve skipped ahead to writing their wedding already, so... you know it ends happily ever after?
Friday Fight Night for Jan 29 (which I did not make oops)
So, this actually turned into a long piece that’s gonna be part of my Chronic Pain series. Basically, King Foltest is treating with the leaders of the Scoia’tael in Temeria and Iorveth is one of them. Unfortunately, he’s having a REALLY BAD pain day, but he’s also determined to be there to represent his people. Roche helps him see sense. Possibly forcefully.
Exhaustion Prompts
“If we’re both in this state, we both really screwed up somewhere huh?”
Iorveth and Roche are trapped in a dream and I got a little stuck creating the creature that trapped them there. But pretty sure Saskia is gonna interrupt their flirting by saving them.
“You were almost dead from pushing it too far!”
In which Roche has a heart attack from too much coffee. Yeah. He’s okay, though! But PT is about to blow a gasket and coffee will very much be disallowed.
Found Family Prompts
Taking Out the Trash for @useless-empty-brain
Literally a story about taking out the trash lmao. We’re gonna see if I can make this intersting.
Touch Starved for @mochii-girl
Honestly, haven’t gotten much done on this yet, but I’m thinking puppy pile cuddles in Corvo Bianco
Coffeeshop AU aka Brewing Romance and Dissent
Ooof I’ve got a lot of bits and pieces of this written, but nothing quite finished, except for the moment when things change from “we flirt as I order coffee” to “I make you special drinks and invite you to come visit me after hours”. Writing a canon coffeeshop au when I know shit all about coffee is HARD.
Curse Breaking
Omg this is one of the first WiPs I started for Iorveth/Roche, no joke. STILL WORKING ON IT! The premise is that Roche finds a feverish and dying Iorveth in an empty Scoia’tael camp, saves him with the power of True Love’s Kiss The Power of Strong Emotions, Like That Which You Might Have For Your Enemy. Then they team up to go save Iorveth’s Scoia’tael from a big bad mage and Roche invites Triss along for the ride, which totally doesn’t make Iorveth jealous. I kinda stalled out at the part where they reach the mage’s hideout and see the results of the mages failed experiments. On Iorveth’s people. It’s gonna hurt. A lot. But afterwards, there might be makeouts. And some sort of implication that they’re all down to do this (minus the horrible, traumatic parts) again.
Roche POV bloodplay
Roche’s POV starting from before his first encounter with Iorveth. Then he has a weirdly sexually arousing encounter with the elf, and tbh, that’s as far as I got. But Iorveth draws blood from Roche’s neck, presses his thumb to it, and then licks it off his thumb. Next, Iorveth was gonna be the one getting Uncomfortably Aroused, but I haven’t gotten that far. No idea where this is going overall.
Iorveth Investigates Roche
This kinda isn’t a real WiP in that idk if I’ll ever finish it. I mostly started it to do some worldbuilding about what public information there would be about Roche. 
Voyeurism AKA Eye on You
Yeah, I don’t have much for the next chapter yet, tbh. So premise is that Iorveth accidentally ends up watching Roche get off at the brothel and finds it really, really hot. Hot enough to get curious and go back for more. Next one is going to involve thigh fucking and Iorveth might possibly get pegged by Daph??? idk
Fake Relationship
Poor @lutes-and-dandelions has been waiting forever for this one and I can’t even find a place to end the scene and post what I have so far. Premise is that Iorveth and Roche are both investigating their missing men and the trail takes them to the Murivel Resort for Couples. So they go undercover. Featuring Roche’s POV of being doubtful, Iorveth using the excuse to flirt outrageously, strip gwent, and a magic amulet that hids Iorveth’s scar and that Roche hates.
Competitive Makeouts AKA The Chase
This was kissing practice and it turned into a casefic! Which is awesome because I love casefics even though I haven’t published any yet. So in this one, as Iorveth and Roche sneak off to makeout, they also end up investigating a conspiracy in the Temerian military. 
Iorveth/Roche(/Kayran) + Roche/Foltest aka Every Kiss Begins with Kayran
In which Roche accidentally walks in on Iorveth’s monthly fuck date with the Kayran and gets invited to join in. Then, somehow,  it starts to turn into a relationship. With an elf and a tentacle monster. And yet, somehow, this relationship is healthier than the one with Foltest. The contrast opens Roche’s eyes.
Pining and Poignards
In which Iorveth stabs Roche with his favorite knife and wants it back and is also maybe pining a lil bit. Meanwhile Roche is rather pissed, but also curious and begins to teach himself Elder Speech to try to read the inscription on Iorveth’s knife. I stalled out in the scene where Iorveth accidentally watches Roche masturbate in the bath.
Iorveth tittyfucking Roche
Look, it’s what it says on the tin. Roche’s POV of Iorveth’s fascination with his chest and how it makes him feel and then there is sex.
Dirty Gremlin Man
Iorveth gets off on Roche being a sweaty, stinky human. Roche pins Iorveth in a fight and Iorveth gets very distracted watching a drop of sweat trail down Roche’s face. So distracted, in fact, that he doesn’t think twice before stretching out his neck and licking it. Then, of course, he remembers where he is. Featuring a very confused Roche, a smidge of jealousy, and Iorveth stealing Roche’s sweaty clothing to do unspeakable things to it. And somehow they get together.
Want me to sit in your lap?
Geralt LEGIT says this to Roche like 5 mins into the Witcher 2 and it’s GREAT. So of course, I had to write a scene where he actually got to. This is set post Witcher 2 while Geralt, Triss, Roche, and Ves are headed back to Temeria. Triss offers Geralt a little stress relief - which involves warming Roche’s cock and watching Triss and Ves get to know one another.
Red is the Rose
So, Chapter 4 is set post-Witcher 2 and Iorveth is obsessing over the fact that the Rose of Remembrance still has not wilted. He wonders what might be possible, so when he hears a rumor that a certain Temerian Commander was taken captive by Dethmold...
Dethmold most definitely dies. But unfortunately, that doesn’t save Roche from the curses he cast. So they go looking for Geralt to find out how to fix it.
This has only been 9 of my documents, y’all. I think I have a problem.
De-Aged Fic aka The language of friendship is not words but meanings
Ugh, I lost my momentum on this one, which sucks, ‘cause the next chapter is so close to done. Iorveth just needs to do a little freaking out first. But then they will both be back to adults and have to DEAL with the fact that they made good friends and would kinda like that again. I think this fic is gonna be purely friendship for them, but they’re gonna get there.
Glory Hole
A fic for the @sugar-and-spice-witcher-bingo where Roche hears a rumor that some Scoia’tael go to this brothel on the outskirts of town and hey, he may as well check it out, right? By going undercover and working the glory hole, of course. He never ACTUALLY expected Iorveth would come, but his legendary mouth was enticing enough to draw the Scoia’tael commander out.
Snuggling
Thirteen “accidentally” handcuffs Iorveth and Roche together when they capture Iorveth. This leads to them lying on the cot in the Stripes’ holding cell, spooning. There is banter and tickling and escapes not attempted and also maybe some sex with Inexperience Iorveth (i say maybe because I already started the sex, but idk if it will fit in). 
Petals and Stripes
A weed is but an unloved flower
Okay, the Stripes are going to attempt to woo Iorveth during a battle. Also, there is a stabbing. And then a kidnapping. And then, miracle of miracles, someone actually tries talking!
One person's weed is another person's wildflower
Ves’s POV! She cleans up the mess her idiots make and terrifies the life out of one elven suitor, but first she’s gotta deal with her own conflicted feelings about her Boss, the guy she relies on to show her the shades of grey in the world, loving the elf she’s supposed to kill. 
After that, I’ve got 2 more fics planned in this ‘verse. One is gonna be a fluffy and/or sexy date after Iorveth and Roche have gotten together. The other is a Scoia’tael side story, featuring lots of gossip about the humans sending their Commander love letters.
Love Shack
The Better Part of Valor
Ugh, I’m stuck on the sex again. Roche is having a really shitty day, so he goes to the cabin and signals Iorveth that he wants a round. Iorveth offers gentle (for them) sex and praise. And at the end, there’s a very significant scene where Iorveth removes his bandana. Roche buries his fingers in Iorveth’s hair, but doesn’t actually see his face, as he’s laying on his stomach with Iorveth on top of him.
Medicine
The morning after! Roche wakes up to find Iorveth in the bath, facing away from him, and notices a new scar. Iorveth has to deal with actually revealing his scars in daylight and they discuss the significant differences in elven and human medicine. Hint: I turned my own medical procedures into elven medicine, so it’s pretty fucking good.
PWP Ovi
Set ambiguously late, maybe after Thou Art More Lovely and More Temperate. Iorveth and Roche explore what Roche can take. We start with overstimulation, go into consensual somnophilia, come inflation, breeding kink, and oviposition. Because elves reproduce by laying eggs, which is not at all the case purely because I started this WiP ages ago and was horny.
The Picture Says It All
There’s going to be 5 more pictures that Rinn draws for Iorveth. Next is Roche hard at work, hunched over a desk. Then we’re getting some shirtless Roche, for “research”, of course. Then Roche cuddling with PT and the rest of the team, about which Iorveth is not at all jealous. Then a face study of Roche during a fight and uh, Iorveth is uncomfortably turned on. And finally, a drawing of their cabin with a silhouette in the window. She knows.
Roche & Rinn: The Haunting of Barrack 8B
Oh man, I really want to finish the next chapter, because I already have the one after that done. But first, we get introduced to Adda! This ‘verse is going to feature Adda the White a lot more than any of my others have done so far and I’m very excited. Also, Silas continues to be terrified of the ghost and the ghost and Adda become girlfriends buddies.
Roche builds Iorveth a home
Set late in the ‘verse, after Roche knows his feelings, but they haven’t said them yet (not out loud, anyway). Iorveth takes a trip to go meet Saskia do things off screen and Roche ends up turning to his old hobby, carpentry, to keep himself from pining too obviously. So obviously he ends up builing Iorveth a solarium. And a pillow nest. And a scaffold so that flowers that blossom in the moonlight cover the glass and give them privacy.
I got stuck here because Rinn needs to give Roche a hint to get him to build the pillow nest, but I hadn’t developed Rinn and Roche’s relationship yet, so had to go back and do that. But eventually Iorveth returns and they have wonderful I’m-not-saying-it-but-i-love-you sex in the new pillow nest.
Foltest (WiP): Long Live the King
This is actually the last fic in the ‘verse, so I don’t want to give too much away. But actually, I haven’t figured out what the next chapter is, BUT I have the chapter after that started and it is GOOD, just you wait!! I’m very excited.
Don’t Cry For Me, Temeria
This ‘verse alone, I have 14 WiPs and a dozen more unwritten ideas.
(Im)Perfect Strangers
I am frustratingly stuck on this chapter. Theoreatically, we are going to have a check in on how the mountain and the rest of our cast is doing and then Roche launches his Wooing TM plan (aka dinner, gift, and dancing).
Between Two Fools
Yeah, Roche and Iorveth have very different understandings of what their gifts represent. There is some soft happiness and then a swift rug pulled out from under Iorveth’s feet, I’m afraid. BUT we are almost to the part where the two idiots sit down and actually talk properly.
Unlucky Number Thirteen
Not only do I have more of Thirteen’s story planned, but I have ideas for ALL the Stripes to have stories. We’ll see how that goes. But for now, Thirteen starts spying for Roche. A lot of still-nebulous stuff happens, including Thirteen’s first time, for which he asks Roche to help. Additionally, once we reach the (Im)Perfect Strangers timeline, Thirteen has a special story all his own. It involves learning to read and a secret I shall not yet reveal.
Silas
Like I said, all the Stripes are hopefully getting stories. But Silas’s is coming along nicely. He starts a new life as “Silas”, as a man, and joins the army. Boot camp is rough and awful and he’s not very good at any of it, but one day, Roche comes looking for a recruit. He needs a codebreaker to decipher Thirteen’s scouting reports (another one for pictures). So Silas joins the Stripes, but he’s still terrified that they’ll fnd out and think he’s been lying to them. Fortunately, they’ll be putting his fears to rest.
Stripes Sex aka Earning Your Stripes: The First Time
PT’s POV! The Stripes (pre-Silas) are all still getting comfortable with each other as a team. But Thirteen has known Roche the longest and in a specific capacity. So one evening when he needs to get out of his head, Thirteen asks Roche to dom him. PT is confused and scandalized and then jealous, but he gets to join in soon too. Meanwhile, Finch and Ves have fun with their bratty arsonist and Fenn is loving it.
break (v /brāk/): to destroy someone's resistance
This is very long and entirely build up to porn. And then lots of porn. A question during a random conversation leads Roche to make Iorveth ask him to take Iorveth utterly apart in a consensual non-consent fantasy set when they were still enemies in the forest.
Bath House
This was supposed to be a simple PWP where Roche talks dirty to Iorveth under his breath while the two of them are at the bathhouse with Boussy (who LOVES baths and brought them to the fancy bath house), Anais, and Thirteen (who HATE baths and react to water much like a cat). They kinda took over the story and there has been no dirty talk yet oops.
Iorveth POV: Tutti
Iorveth begins to reclaim his love for music and lets himself improvise and compose again. And he ends up writing a song that is the story of his and Roche’s romance.
Daggers, Dumplings, and Dresses
The Elihal/Hattori side story! Though we haven’t actually met Hattori yet. So far, Elihal is expounding on his past and his relationship with Iorveth (he used to make all of Iorveth’s fancy gowns for concerts). Elihal and Hattori won’t play a HUGE role in (Im)Perfect Strangers, but they will be appearing!
Ves and Ciaran aka The First Rule of Fight Club
Ves is stuck walking a very long way back to Vergen with the memory of Ciaran’s skin against her teeth. And even though elves lie like breathing, she can’t help thinking about what he said about Roche not being worth her loyalty. Slowly, she begins to work some things out.
Sex with Saskia/Dragonfucking
Yeah, it’s what it sounds like. Iorveth tells Roche that Saskia agreed to a threesome and where to meet, but he neglected to mention the rather large dragon that was currently rimming his ass. Roche gets distracted from his confusion by the hotness and watches Iorveth get fucked by a dragon (with 2 dicks to fit 2 holes, of course).
Come Inflation + Piss Play
Um. Yeah, it’s a PWP where Roche asks Triss for a potion that will make him come a lot. And then Iorveth wants more. No idea where it’s going, tbh.
Stripes vs Scoia’tael: Water Balloon Fight
Literally a water balloon fight. For morale.
Baby Mama
Uh, the title is a bit telling here oops. But let’s just say Iorveth and Roche go on vacation to the cabin on top of the mountain again when Iorveth is hit with the sudden extreme urge to breed. Roche is down, but at some point, they do actually need to talk.
King Roche aka fics where Roche is in charge and hates it. Some are more in line with this than others.
Post W3 Becoming Terrorists Together
Ah yes, the murder husbands fic. Literally, Roche gets stuck leading Temeria under Emhyr’s orders and he’s good at it, but he HATES it. Enter Iorveth, who both points out security flaws, joins Roche for a surprisingly unawkward bath, and proposes that they go hunting down war criminals on their own time. How can Roche say no?
Pre-W2 Ambassadorial AU
Different first meeting AU! In this one, Iorveth is sent as the elven ambassador to Temeria and it’s about as much fun as one might expect. Triss and Roche, the other outcasts amongst Temerian court, decide to befriend him. Well, try to anyway. idk where this is going, but it’s been fun. Also, Iorveth wears a fancy braid over his eye, because I said so. Also, I might be planning an OT3 porn scene at some point, because it turns out, elves are VERY sensitive to magic XD
Leap of Faith
Okay, yeah, this has nothing to do with King Roche, but it’s the doc I was working in when I got the idea. In this one, a mage captures Iorveth for Foltest and starts torturing him. Roche, without really thinking about it, decides the mage goes too far, so he kills them. Leaving him with an elven prisoner and a castle full of people who will consider him a traitor for that. They escape the city, but now Iorveth has gotta convince Roche that no, the King really won’t forget that whole murder and prisoner escape thing. 
The whole point of this fic was for me to write them jumping off a cliff lmao. When am I gonna get to that? Probably like last or second to last chapter, tbh. Which should be... after the next one? No, I lied, it’s next chapter! I need to get on that!
An ill-favour’d thing, sir, but mine own aka Possessive Sex
Piss Fic
Um. Yeah. Roche is really horny when Iorveth gets home and is on him immediately, which is great, but Iorveth has gotta piss. Which becomes less urgent as Roche is determined to have his face fucks, but after he comes all over Roche’s face, it’s VERY urgent and Roche is a fucking brat and won’t move out of the way. So obviously the response to this is to piss on Roche’s crotch - which Roche is apparently more than okay with.
Cum Dumpster Roche
Yeah, this one doesn’t have much yet, I literally just wanted Roche getting railed and claimed and L O V I N G it. 
Possessiveness
Iorveth spends a lot of time thinking about his enemy, his nemesis. He’s researched Roche extensively, spent hours thinking up tactics and strategies to outwit his nemesis. He literally knows what Roche named his stupid weapons, but he’s never actually met Roche.
But he’s dreamt about it. The Roche in reality doesn’t look like the assumptions he made in his dreams, but who cares about looks? Because Roche is his, and certainly not some dh’oine king’s.
Tentacles + Breeding
Gods, this one is SO CLOSE to being done dammit, I just gotta finish it!! But it’s a fun one. Iorveth and Roche are fighting, when Iorveth suddenly starts fighting plants, which are fighting back. Then the plants notice Roche and suddenly he’s tied up with vines and his clothes are getting torn off and uh, he’s not supposed to find this hot, is he? But he really kinda does. And then Iorveth goes and claims him and tries to protect him from a nearly-extinct non-sentient plant that sensed a warm spot to lay its eggs until someone else could come along and fertilize them. Iorveth is delighted to be that person.
Dream: Pleasure Slave
Yeah, Roche really likes getting claimed in these. In this one, he has a favorite dream setting where Iorveth rules some grand elven kingdom and Roche’s only role is to bring him pleasure. Not to deal with politics or nobles or policy, but just to make Iorveth feel good. So far, this features cock warming, come inflation, a leather cock cage (so to speak), prostate milking, and a very nice silver chalice that Iorveth expects Roche to fill before they’re done.
Roche wears a collar
This was gonna be a simple lil thing based on me creating Roche in heroforge and giving him a lil hidden collar. But then Iorveth decided to get really sappy and had to design and create the perfect collar for his enemy. And then, much to his surprise, he gets the opportunity to PUT his collar on Roche. Which is great, except the sight distracts him so much that Roche manages to escape.
But the next time they meet, Roche is still wearing that collar, hidden under his chaperon and armor. Iorveth has feelings about that.
Standalone
Crones fic aka And Ghosts Did Shriek and Shrill
So this is the angsty fic that started from a crack premise. Er, one of them. I seem to do that a lot. But in this one, Roche goes to the Ladies of the Woods and asks for his men back. The Ladies agree, in exchange for 6 lifetimes of service. But no creature can reverse death. Which leads to the Stripes coming back to “life” as ghosts - only Roche is the only one who can see them. Ves can’t (not at first). 
Believe it or not, the whole idea behind this was the Stripes roasting Roche as he tries to flirt (terribly) with Iorveth. But uh... somehow it turned pretty dark. Like, it’ll have a happy ending for sure, but it’s gonna be a lot about processing trauma and grief and building families and also curing a plague, because that’s the first assignment from the Ladies.
Stripes fics
Cuddles with the Commander
This is intended to be a sequel to The Pride of Temeria, but I kinda got stuck figuring out exactly how Roche should react. Tbh, I don’t have much of this written yet, but the goal is for Roche to approve cuddles with everyone lmao.
Fire Breating
Okay, this one started as crack purely because I love fire, but it’s actually been really fun. So, Iorveth and Roche are established and Iorveth has been invited to a family night with the Stripes, which is kinda a lil awkward. So they decide to showcase some of their talents - which includes Roche singing musicals and PT breathing fire.
Iorveth is horrified that humans have harnessed this skill.
Iorveth’s missing eye
This is really short and idk if I’ll continue it, but the idea was for Roche to really wonder what was up with the bandana over half of Iorveth’s face was about. And then, of course, to find out.
Iorveth Gangbang
Why is this under Stripes fics, you might ask? Well, I have great news for you. Guess who the gang is?
In which Iorveth and Roche are in an established relationship and Iorveth gets tied up in the middle of the Stripes’ camp while Roche orders his men to take him apart. Iorveth very much enjoys himself, and then when the Stripes are tapped out, Roche shows ‘em how it’s done.
Kink Bingo fics aka that event that I totally failed, but hey, prompts are prompts.
Age Kink
In this fic, Iorveth and Roche both end up captured by unknown forces and end up imprisoned together. I think the Stripes and Scoia’tael are probably working together to find them and save them, but in the meantime, Iorveth and Roche decide to get to know each other a bit better. Featuring muscle spasms, blow jobs, and pain kink.
Eskel/Lambert (okay, a little out of place here, but eh, it’s in the doc and I am still working on it)
Started for a prompt on tumblr, Eskel and Lambert end up fighting and, trying to keep the peace, Eskel casts axii on Lambert. Which leads to Lambert confessing that he bit Eskel because it’s the only way he could get his mouth on him. This leads to some dodged confessions, some frottage, and some snarky banter, because of course it does. 
Tempt Not a Desperate Man aka the Fuck or Die series that started with Devour What’s Truly Yours
Fisting
The next part of the series, where Roche struggles with the fact that he’s been high key horny ever since the encounter in the woods with Iorveth and nothing is satisfying him. Iorveth, on the other hand, is jealous and annoyed that Roche keeps going to the whorehouse.
Then Roche decides to make a potentially suicidal move and enters the forest to try to find the clearing from last time. And, as you might guess from my heading, fisting will be happening. 
Iorveth POV: The Chaperon
Okay, I don’t actually have much of this written, but it’s really cute so - Roche keeps using his chaperon as a cum rag, so Iorveth knits and/or sews him a new one.
“Human Bootlicker”
PWP where Iorveth jokingly suggestions Roche should surrender on his knees - and then Roche does. And asks Iorveth to take his prize. Featuring Roche coming all over Iorveth’s boots from getting his face fucked, then leaning down and licking up the mess while Iorveth watches and then comes over his face.
One Accidental Proposal and Five Attempts At Accepting
So one of the themes of this ‘verse is gonna be the Elven Baths where the Roses of Remembrance grow. As in, they decide to make the elven baths a place they meet up. This is the first time Iorveth takes Roche there, and Roche does not know what significance the roses have. But he DOES know that Iorveth blushes cutely when he tucks a rose behind Iorveth’s ear, so...
Iorveth would like to accept, only Roche doesn’t know WHAT he’s trying to accept.
The Legend
So in the game, there is a legend around the statue of elven lovers above the elven baths. “Legend has it the lover’s sighs are enchanted within these very stones, though only those in love can hear them.” 
Iorveth overhears his Scoia’tael gossiping about the legend and comes to an abrupt realization that Roche and him were the ones they were hearing. Oops?
Standalone Fics
Letters
This is kind of a bittersweet WiP that I mostly wrote in one go and then went to sleep and kinda lost the will for it. BUT the premise is that post-Witcher 3 Roche is in charge of Temeria and his brooding is interrupted when he receives a letter sealed with a forget me not pressed into wax. Iorveth continues to send letters describing his life as a “civilian” in Nilfgaard and how much he hates it and Roche relates a little bit too much. Then Iorveth decides to run away and live on the streets as a musician and he might inspire Roche to start learning the cello and presumably at some point, they meet.
Identity Porn
Iorveth and Roche have a meet cute in Flotsam’s tavern while the elf is listening in for local gossip and Roche is passing through on his way to meet with the other northern kings to get support in fighting against the new emerging threat of the Scoia’tael. Neither knows who the other is, but that doesn’t stop them from starting a relationship where they meet every time Roche passes through Flotsam. But their house of cards can only last so long, and at some point, they will meet as enemies. Who knows what happens then? idk, not me.
Gwent pinup calendar aka Cards Out for Your Country
Hahaha, so I started this series in response to some WONDERFUL art of Roche with his Tits Out For Temeria. And obviously we need more of that, so I created a list of 24 characters who are asked to pose for some pinup art, all in the name of Gwent. So far, I’ve only finished Dandelion’s pose/the introduction, but I do plan to do as many of them as I physically can.
Gwent Game in Corvo Bianco
Wow, I didn’t even remember this WiP, so uh... clearly I haven’t worked on it in a while. But it’s Iorveth’s POV of how surprisingly comfortable he is in Corvo Bianco and Iorveth and Geralt get drunk and play gwent.
Zoltan/Jaskier/Priscilla
A giftfic for Wibbly that involves Zoltan being sappy about his bards and then Priscilla dominates them. Featuring all my headcanons about dwarven genitalia (two holes, one with a retractible dick).
Dijkstra fics
Noticing Roche’s Fucked Up Relationship
Anyone else randomly finding themselves shipping Dijkstra/Roche? No? Ah well. For this one Dijkstra observes Roche and sees a few too many reminders of himself with Vizimir, except Foltest is no Vizimir, and Roche clearly hasn’t learned to set up boundaries. Dijkstra feels weirdly compelled to help him figure that out before Foltest destroys him.
Developing Respect Fic
Also known as “let’s torture Roche 1.0!” This fic switches between the present, where Roche has woken up in a cell somewhere unknown and it brings back far too many memories for him to be entirely sure of what is happening when. In the past, he was captured by Redania while on a mission for Foltest, long before he was anyone notable. Dijkstra comes to visit, curious about this prisoner who refuses to break, to even tell them his name or confirm his country (but he has a Temerian tramp stamp, so they know lmao). So Dijkstra decides that this is not a man who will be broken through torture and decides to try conversation instead. The idea is to show them slowly gaining respect for each other, but like, obviously Roche is still a prisoner. Eventually, he’s returned to Temeria in a prisoner exchange, but meanwhile, in the present, Roche is all alone, with not even guards around and no way to free himself.
and that’s all!! I am... legitimately scared to count, tbh. This post is so fucking long, the number cannot be good for my heart. But, that said, please come talk to me about any ideas you find interesting!! Or anything you have questions about! 
And if you made it this far down the list... wow. Thank you, you rock.
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thegirlwholied · 3 years
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hello i am sorry to bother you here but i thought i will try to ask you about your amazing fanfic on ao3 (love's such an old fashioned word). i found it yesterday and since than i'm keep thiking about it. please tell me you will continue it! i left a review for you on the website but i've seen you don't really active there anymore:( i really hope i won't come off as a weirdo or anything just i really loved your story:) i wish you the best:))
It's never a bother & you found the very best way to contact me! I do always get & so deeply appreciate the AO3 emails but when it comes to actual *replies* tend to do that in batches eons & eons later... but always happy to talk fic on Tumblr! Thank you for asking, & sending lots of good vibes your way; I wish I had a fic update to send but alas I am nowhere near one.
I'm so glad you're enjoying love's such an old-fashioned word & I do think about it all the time myself... but. In that case why isn't it updated? Truth?
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Well. I mean, yes, I intend to finish it. It’s not writer’s block; I know what happens next and how it ends. So uh why is this one not finished?
-I'm not the fastest updater in the best of times (see: the start date of my finished fics vs. when I ended them, lol).
-We are not in the best of times.
-(I'm very lucky to still be working and that my job was already remote and that I have off weekends and the usual holidays but) 
I have taken one week off work since Oct. 2019, my last real vacation, and that was only a long weekend. My free time is limited and my energy is low! 
- I've prioritized my own fiction over fan fiction for the past decade really; in 2020 the draw of nostalgia & escapism & need for any sense of accomplishment & connection really drove me back toward fan fic (but...) - my own stories are still my priority...
- ...whenever I get writing again because I’m coming off what turned out to be a concussion and genuinely haven’t written much at all since September. I'm trying to get back now though! To any story that’ll have me!
- But.
- My (stupid) concussion was Sept; my last update of the fic was end of May.
- So?
- June.
Basically... J.K. Rowling happened to June.
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I mean that sums it up really, and you didn't come to my inbox for my opinion on *that* but uh yikes of yikeses @ all that, and I said a bit here and this was still in my drafts so I’ve posted it, as this too I guess. 
Anyway, June stopped my happy-fic writing pretty cold. I can only imagine (and read about!) how it made other fans feel. 
So! I feel pretty weird about how much time & love & energy I have put into writing HP fics over the years! How much time & love & energy I put into writing as-canon-as-possible, combed-through-those-books-like-Bibles fics! I don’t just magically un-love the books, not by any means, not something I loved that hard growing up especially, but uh. Yeah. It’s kind of a weird, drained-out feeling when I think about that. Which especially sucks, in a year when the world itself is draining, and my love of Harry Potter’s world was this joyful, freeing thing to escape back to and share with fellow fans. 
I’m not trying to inflict my drain on anyone! The sense of accomplishment & connection regarding fan fiction, including HP fanfiction, is still there too! That people read my fic means so much to me, and how we’ve all shared a love of these characters all these years, and I have no intent to let kind readers like you down. I want to finish my own darn stories for myself, too; I write what I want to read. I want to read the end of that story. Written - and this is key - in a non-joy-sucking mood.  
And this story, particularly, a fic featuring how Petunia, lost in a smallness and meanness she herself doesn’t even see, can surprise us and still be better, a story hinged on hope and belief that people can change, even if they usually don’t, even if only in an alternate universe, things could be a little bit brighter?
Don’t worry. While I’m sorry that I can make no promises as to when! - I’m sure as hell finishing that one. <3
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vagarius · 4 years
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misukazu 21
(if you saw me fuck up the other one no you didnt)
EDIT I THINK THIS ONE GOT A LITTLE FUCKED UP TOO BUT IT’S... READABLE...
questions from this post, and answers originally written for this thread!!
If you had to change the pairing’s very first meeting, how would you change it?    their canon first meeting is already so good SHDGFLJASHG but if i had to choose a different one that's still within the context of mankai... meeting as kids and losing touch and coming back together completely different at mankai
What song fits your pairing the most?    uhhHHhhHHH i don't have a real answer but i do have a partial playlist for one of my misukazu aus and the only two songs in it are furaregai girl by sayuri and champagne's for celebrating by mayday parade and i feel like that says enough sldhgalsdhfalsh
What is your favorite AU/prompt idea/trope for your pairing?     ALL MISUKAZU AUS ARE GOOD but. i really love any au where their first meeting is in the future and both are still kind of lost but they're Older and it's hard to let themselves fall into the easy trust they find in canon. i just think that'd be neat.
Do you prefer canon ideas or do you have your own headcanons for them?     I'VE SAID THIS MANY TIMES BUT CANON MISUKAZU GIVES OFF MADE FOR EACH OTHER VIBES AND USUALLY I DON'T VIBE WITH THAT BUT THEY REALLY ARE WHAT THE OTHER NEEDS... AND I THINK EVEN IF THEY HAD TO PART THEY'D STILL BE ABLE TO BE BETTER PEOPLE BC THEY HAD MET
Favorite canon moment of them?     THERE ARE SO MANY but the one that immediately comes to mind is misumi carrying drunk kazu to bed (latest bday line) because drunk kazu is so soft and it implies that misumi wanted to wish happy birthday to kazu pretty late... what did he want to give him...
Least favorite canon moment of them?     hmm... there's not really one i can think of??? IM SORRY I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY I LOVE ALL THEIR CANON MOMENTS
Favorite headcanon trope/idea? (Your own or someone else’s)    this is somehow both vague and very specific but i think misukazu gives off this vibe: He's beautiful. I can't tell him. or "Kazu is always beautiful~" Don't call me that, Kazu thinks. I'm not. so... insecurities i guess ????? AJSHAJJD
Favorite aspect of them/their relationship dynamics?     THIS IS GOING TO SOUND SO CHEESY but i love how /real/ they allow themselves to be around each other. misukazu at their best is when one thinks "you're you. and i love that you" and the other knows this. i just. THEY VALIDATE THE OTHER SO MUCH CRIES
Least favorite aspect of them/their relationship dynamics? (Can be headcannon)     this isn't a "least fav" so much as "it makes me sad" but if either of them showed any sign of not being interested anymore the other is more likely to give up then push anything. sort of like "it was bound to happen, so i'll enjoy now until they drop me" or EVEN WORSE they think the other would be better off without them and pushes them away. so yeah the fact i can see one of these happening makes me sad.
If they aren’t a canon pairing, how would you get them together?     they give off "everyone knows we're dating but us" energy but at the same time i feel like they'd acknowledge there's something and just not define it bc a) they don't need to (misumi) or b) they're too nervous to (kazu). in other words i think one day they are holding hands and misumi says "kazu? is this dating?" and kazu holds his breath before asking "do you want it to be?"
If you had to take them and plunk them into another fandom, what fandom would that be? Why?     i think theyd be hilarious in any sports animanga (kazu is manager tho bc noodle arms but maybe they bond when misumi walks him through some of his usual training menu one night - ahem. anyway) BUT ALSO horimiya au...
How hard is it write/draw your pairing? Scale of 1-10.     AJDHAJDHSF I REALLY LOVE THEM SO IT COMES PRETTY EASILY... but sometimes you try to put them in tropes and realize they would Just Not Work Like That. idk where i'm going with this. but yeah. anyway 3 for sankaku.
Is there a pairing that you think rivals them?     in terms of what i ship, i tend to ship kazu and misumi individually with a lot of dif charas AJDHAKD. but in terms of like... in-universe "rival" pairings: kazu side: tsuzukazu (maybe, lbr it would take them 273924 yrs to actually get together), kazu x someone from winter (i... have my reasons but they'd take longer than what this answer entails) misumi side: ... surprisingly none that i can think of ahdjahd
Which character of the pairing do you like more? (Would you ever pair yourself with them?)     you know that tweet that's like "sometimes a ship is just your two favs"? yeah that's misukazu for me. but if i had to choose... misumi AJDHAJHDSF I HONESTLY WASNT THAT INTO YUME UNTIL THESE TWO CAME AROUND (NOT COUNTING 707)... but yeah if they wanted to hold me in their arms i wouldn't oppose
Which character of your pairing would be the one to break up with the other? Why?     OOOOOH BOY well. i think it could be either of them. i don't think they'd break up for lack of love but too much love and wanting the other to be happy and thinking that the only way to give them that is to let them go. so i guess the question is which of them would be more likely to be selfish and hold on. thinking this way, i think misumi would be more likely to break-up, bc kazu has lots of friends who are better than him!! and misumi is more ready to leave if he thinks he needs to than kazu is. now im sad.
Are they relatable as characters or as a pairing?     THE NUMBER OF TIMES I'VE BEEN CALLED KAZU KIN... in all seriousness kazu's struggles with speaking out and (shinobi spoilers) his uncertainty over his future hit real close to home... while i don't relate as much as misumi, his struggles always manage to tear my heart into pieces... ((oversharing alert) i guess what really separates me from misumi is his struggle with his desire to connect with family who has treated him poorly... whereas im more "lol fuck you") tldr i relate to kazu slightly more LOL
Did you once/ever dislike one/both of them?     i never disliked them but i was NOT expecting either of them to shoot up so quickly into my favs list ahdjahdjf. also i started shipping them Immediately After reading summer main story so there's that
On an estimate, how many posts have you made about them?    as of september 28th 2020 i make up 11/78 fics on ao3 in the romantic misukazu tag and 2/12 in the platonic one. i may have brainrot.
What made you decide to ship them?     TBH I FINISHED THE MAIN STORY AND WENT "OH MY GOD... THAT'S MY SHIP" but now that i'm here i continue to ship them because they have the potential to bring out both the best and the worst in each other and i'm all about that
Favorite genre for them? (Angst, fluff, etc.)     angst. i just. angst hurt/comfort all the way. im so sorry babies.
lol you thought there would just be 21 ANYWAY EXTRA 1: how do they spend breaks/vacation?    they'd travel a lot when they're older!! kazunari loves to travel and misumi would follow kazunari anywhere (also, new triangles!!) so they go somewhere new whenever they have the time. however i think eventually one or both of their future careers will take them anywhere and everywhere anyway, so their "ideal vacation" might turn into an evening in, cuddling and catching up (as if they didn't already send play-by-play updates over the phone of whatever they did during the day)
EXTRA 2: first date?     i don't they ever have an explicit first date, but if asked they'll cite the time they had a picnic in the park turned triangle hunt turned accidental dip in the duck pond. at least, kazunari will. misumi just tilts his head and wonders what you mean.
EXTRA 3: gifts?     IM FEELING REALLY CHEESY SO I'M MAKING THIS ABOUT ANNIVERSARY GIFTS they both end up getting each other jewelry (although kazu was really really nervous bc he wasn't sure if misumi would wear it). kazu gets misumi a bracelet (with triangles, of course although misumi only wears it sometimes because he doesn't want to lose it) and misumi gets kazu a pair of triangle earrings "so we can match!" and kazunari combusts at the implications
EXTRA 4: sharing clothes     THEY'RE ACTUALLY AROUND THE SAME SIZE (and tend to wear baggier stuff barring kazu's skinny jeans)... but they have completely different Styles so it's still really obvious when steal each other's stuff ahdjajdkaf. as cute as kazu would look in sumi's sweatshirt i think the much more likely scenario is kazu wrapping misumi in his jackets because this boy nEVER BRINGS HIS ANYWHERE anyway just. accidental shared wardrobe misukazu.
EXTRA 5: lake house au    consider: kazunari living in a house on the shore of a lake for a summer for Art Purposes (and a little bit for Dealing With Life purposes but he's not gonna admit that) and meets his lake neighbor misumi who kazu thinks might be a ghost or spirit for a while but he actually just lives further down the lake and misumi unknowingly helps kazu with his Life Issues and maybe they fall in love
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s1aiki · 3 years
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A little Story I wrote, Idk I kinda like it
(Day Three, Hour: 9 hours since the day started)
(Elle POV)
(First Person POV)
Running. It was always running. Why, why running, out of all things? Out of all the things that I could have had to do every day, why was it the thing I hated most of all, running? I’m not any good at running, so why did everyone else say that I would be the best one to run to the stores in town each day to try and find something that had survived 'it'. Obviously, nothing other than the people or things that were in the bunker survived, as expected, but everyone said that it would be good to check everyday for up to a month.
Whatever, I should probably be getting back now, I gotta make sure no one tries to kill each other. I still don’t understand why no one else made their own bunkers, maybe if there was another one we wouldn’t have to put people into the same building for maybe even up to a year with their bullies, or just people that they had a bad past with. No matter how I look at it, some people really are just dumb.
Sure, there are some people that I do enjoy being stuck with, like Nichole and Violet, but I feel like it’s kind of a waste to help people like Makenzie and Bella, who were just all in all jerks and bad people. They had bullied me and my friends all throughout middle and high school, and yet the second they learnt about the fact that ‘it’ would be happening, they came running over, begging to have a space in the bunker. Maybe if I learnt how to not be nice to every single person I meet, I could have turned them down, but of course, me being me, I just smiled and let them in. Luckily they were the last people, because I fear that if more people came to try and get in we wouldn’t have all fit in such a tight space.
Anyways, I better have not forgotten the password like last time, I’m almost back to the bunker. That was so embarrassing, having to call Liz to let me in. Liz is okay I guess, she’s not a bully like Makenzie or Bella, but me and her have never really been friends, but recently because of *certain* living situations, we’ve hung out quite a bit more, and she seems really.. Nice? No, that's not it... Cool? I guess she is pretty cool. And she always tells off people like Makenzie and Bella, so that also makes her cool I guess?
Whatever, I’m almost back, this is the road that leads to the bunker. I can’t even remember how many times I’ve walked down this road, whether it be on patrol, like recently, or building the bunker and taking breaks to go to the 7 11 down the road, to buy some drinks and cool off. The chashires there were pretty nice, but none of them lived in Brooke, they just came here to visit their families over breaks and needed a job to make a little bit of cash before they went back. I don;t blame them though, I’ve worked plenty of part time jobs to save up for things in the bunker, and other things. It’s nice having a bit of extra cash around the house, it makes sure you know you’re gonna be okay, and you have extra money in case something bad ever happens.
Alright, I’m back now. What was that passcode again... 4847045? Or 4857056? Wait no, it was 4747085.. Right? Ugh, I’m just gonna check. 4...7...5... (BEEP). Alright, next one. ..8..9...3...6.. (Click) alright, that's the right one then! Haha, and I even managed to keep it on tune with my playlist! My music always seems to be on time for weird things, like when the first sirens went off, my phone just randomly turned on and started playing one of my favorite playlists, as if to try and comfort me. I guess it’s kinda cool? Whatever-
Ugh, why is it so loud here? Right, this isn’t my house. This is the bunker, with about 37 people in here. I’m still not used to having so many people here, especially because I barely knew half of them, and were on bad-ish terms with about ¼ of them. What the heck are they even fighting over this time, someone taking someone's shoe? No one other than me, Liz, Miss Jackson, and Derrick and Gabrial have even gone outside, who cares about a shoe you aren’t gonna need for a few more months? Besides, they aren’t even that expensive anymore, you can just walk into a shop and take a pair of shoes from the stand. It literally costs you nothing.
“Hello Elle, welcome back!”
Ahh, Gracice. The youngest person here as far as I know, she’s about 6 years old? She lived with Miss Jackson for a while, but now they both live here, so we all are in charge of taking care of her. She’s a really sweet girl, and quite smart for her age, so I see no problem in keeping her here and raising her ourselves. She doesn’t really understand what happened, so she’s a good person to talk to when you just need an escape from this reality. She loves showing everyone her drawings of them, and for some reason always has candy and flowers, even though she hasn’t been outside in about four, almost five days now? Who really knows at this point, I’m just tired.
“Hello Gracie, how are you today?”
I suppose it is only right to talk to her if she starts a conversation, she’s a nice kid, and she doesn’t know that all I want is to get in bed and sleep until the world goes back to normal, or as normal as it can be after everything that has happened recently. It’s not her fault, she's not a mind reader, and she’s still a little kid, so she doesn’t really understand why everyone is so aggravated recently. I swear, some people look at each other like they want to tear them apart recently.
“I’m doing really good! I Made a drawing of me and Mommy, and I made some cookies with Nikki and Becca! They tasted really good! What did you do outside today Elle?”
Cookies? When did they get the ingredients to make cookies? Whatever, that kid is magic, I swear. No matter how long she’s been inside, she still looks like she's been playing in the sun all day, and always has random things that I have no idea how she got or where she found, and whenever I ask she just says that she found them. Like, a few days ago she came up to me and just handed me a fresh tulip. I asked her where she had gotten it, because we don’t have Tulips in the indoor garden, and she just said that she found it. It’s kind of scary, but the kid never found anything bad, she just found cute little kid things, like crayons and paper, flowers, and food. It is still kind of scary, but she’s super sweet and uses everything she finds as gifts for everyone else.
“I just did the usual, check for cool things and people, walk around town to try and find useful things that I could bring back to everyone”
Eh, I guess it’s best to just tell her the truth, she’s gonna have to find out sooner rather than latter, so I think it’s best to learn about everything happening outside slowly, and not just say ‘oh yeah, someone tried to blow us all up so now we’re living down here and might be for the rest of our lives, yes even your life six year old child’.. There’s just something about that that seems a bit- intense. Especially for a six year old, who has almost no idea of what the world is like outside from their school and house, and obviously would be terrified by this.
“Ooo, didya find anything cool? Like a crystal? Or some toys? If you ever find some cool toys while you’re out on your cool scout-y missions, could you give them to me? We don’t have much here, so it would be really fun to have something to do again!”
I mean, what did she think I was going to do if I found some random toys while scouting, just find them and be like ‘oh look, some cool toys! I should keep these for 22 year old me, and not give them to the six year old that lives with me. Perfect idea!’. No, of course not. If I found toys I would give them to the little kids that live with me, because even if they are slightly traumatized by seeing some of their family get blown up by the government, They still need some sort of childhood that isn’t completely a sob story to tell all the little kids when they are (or if they make it to becoming) an old person.
“No, sadly I didn’t find any cool things on this trip. If I did, I promise I would give them to you and the other kids as soon as I got back though, I promise!”
I wonder if there are cool kids toys or rocks and stuff that I could find while scouting. So far most things had either been burned or hidden, so it would be hard to find something that wasn’t burnt to a crisp that was still in nice condition to play with. Whatever, I’m not lying though. If I find something like that, I will give it to the kids that live here, they just kinda deserved it a bit more than 22-year old me. I hope I can find something worth giving soon, she asks me the same question every day, she must miss her old stuff. I don’t blame her though, I miss my house and my stuff too, but now we just have to adapt to living like this, in a bunker, with about 34 other people.
“Awh, alright then. C’ya later Elle!”
Alright, I wonder what everyone else is doing. I can hear them from all the way up here, so I bet at least three people are fighting, and if my ears aren’t completely broken, it's probably Hanna, Fiona, and Jacobe. For some reason Jake, as some of us have come to call Jacobe, and the girls have daily fights about the stupidest stuff, and then just forget about it in the next few minutes, and then the cycle repeats about three-six times a day. It can be really annoying, but it is what it is, and you just kinda get used to it after spending so much time around the two of them. Sure, I’m not saying that it's fun to deal with, but after a while it just becomes background noise. Whatever, I should head downstairs to everyone else now, if I don’t wanna miss lunch.
I can’t believe I let all these people into my house, but I got myself into what I got myself into, so it is what it is. Can’t wait for another day...
Day One: The Bunker - Part One: Hello... Completed
(Alright so this is a Picrew I made, but this just kinda shows what Elle looks like lol)
📷
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daredevilexchange · 4 years
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What's your fannish ID? Quietshade. I've been writing and in the fandom arena since the late 90s.
What types of fanworks do you create? I do Fics and art. I also started a comic, but this year has kept me too busy to continue. I hope to go back to it eventually. I'm also thinking of branching into visual novel territory since it involves my three passions, writing, drawing and video games.
What are your favourite types of fanworks, when you're not creating? Fics, I like reading the best.
What do you like in particular about this fandom? Hmm, I really like the ideas behind Daredevil. I think they managed to tell grounded and layered stories while mixing up the superhero genre and that really appealed to me. But mostly I've stayed because of the people I've met here. It's a really nice community. Regarding characters, ships and tropes. I am partial to Karedevil, but I love each one of Matt's relationships, and I find some joy in each of the characters. I love how human they are. They're flawed, they make mistakes, and they all struggled to find the best version of themselves. That's something I really appreciate. That's probably my favorite trope, if it can be called that. I just love seeing people overcome challenge and how that brings out the bets and the worst out of them. So I guess that's the kind of stories I prefer.
Do you like participating in fan events? Hmm, the short answer is yes. I enjoy it. I like interacting with people and I like the sense of community those events bring. But I'm also an introvert with some degree of social anxiety so these events tired me out pretty fast. I end up skipping a lot of them because I just don't have the energy to do them at a given time. I'm also part of the @karedevilsquad and admin the @karedevilbingo.
What about your creating process? My process is a mess, don't use me as an example please. Lol I'm the kind of person that zooms in and forgets about everything. When I'm in the mood I just sit down and everything pours out. I can spend hours and hours working without a break, but If I can't find that mood then I'm pretty much doing stuff at slug pace... I use music for inspiration, to get me into the zone, but once I'm there the music gets in the way. So yeah, I'm literally a case of whenever the muse strikes.
Do you interact a lot with other fans? I do, kind of. I have some regular fan friends I speak to a lot, but it is hard for me to speak to new fans. Sometimes I wish I didn't have such a hard time talking to new people, but I'm also very happy with the friends I already have.
Is there any particular piece you'd like to showcase for this post? I guess... I'm usually happy with whatever I made the last. Because anything new I make is a challenge I was able to overcome. So here is my latest work: https://qs63.tumblr.com/post/625844393518284800/the-sound-of-a-firework-explosion-woke-the-child I also created a small alt universe called Lucasverse, which features Matt and his OC (KD) kid. And also has frequent appearances from the other Defenders, Frank, Elektra, Spider-Man, and some of the Avengers. https://qs63.tumblr.com/tagged/lucasverse
Do you have other fandoms you'd like to talk about? Oh dear. All the sad boys/girls stories. I mean it. I really like the type of character driven stories with people who have had sad/difficult lives but are still kind and trying their best to make the world a happier place. Full Metal Alchemist, Fruits Basket, The promised Neverland, Final Fantasy 7, so many of Marvel and DC stories lol the list is too long.
Is there anything else you want to tell us about yourself? I guess... that English isn't my language... I'm sorry about all the mistakes you might find. ^-^'
Where can your fanworks be found? For art: https://qs63.tumblr.com/tagged/my-art For fics: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quietshade
Thank you, @qs63!
banner by @context-is-for-kingpins !
[ID on a white background, four black triangles that look like  spotlights from above. Each illuminates one of the Defenders silhouetted  in white: Jessica, Luke, Danny, Matt. A hand on the left is holding a  pen writing the words Content Creator Spotlight. There is a little Punisher skull on the pen. End ID]
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bondsmagii · 3 years
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2, 8, 26, 37, 38, 57, 72, 91, 94, 100
> questions to ask at 4:02am meme 🌕🌃
thank you! 
2: Do you mourn for a place or person you’ve never known?
yes 😩 I can’t even adequately describe what’s going on here, but there’s a lot of people and a lot of places that feel familiar even if I don’t know them, if that makes sense? and there’s also a lot of people I could have become, and a lot of places I could have been, and I do have moments where I kind of mourn them even though I have no proof that they would have even existed in that specific way. I do think this is normal to an extent, but also I do this a lot, lol.
on a slightly less philosophical level, I of course mourn my older brother, who’s quite literally a person I never got the chance to know.
8: Do you think you can put love into categories (family, platonic, romantic, etc.) or is it just one general sensation?
oh man definitely. the love you feel for your friends isn’t the same love you feel for your spouse or your parents, and so on and so forth. there’s lots of different kinds of love, and lots of different levels within those types, and you’re also more than capable of feeling several different types and levels towards the same person, in my opinion. I don’t know if I would try and categorise everything, because something like love doesn’t really suit being shoved into boxes, but there are different types of love and I find it’s constantly shifting and changing along with you and the object of your love, which is cool.
I should add that I don’t find any one type of love more or less important than the others. seriously, destroy the idea that romantic love is the One True Love, and all other forms are somehow lesser. that’s just garbage.
26: What’s the most life-changing choice you’ve made so far?
this is kind of embarrassing but the truth often is: almost eight years ago I decided to make a sideblog on here that has... something to do with writing, let’s say, and something to do with... a certain character... and anyway that decision led to me meeting a certain person and going from awkward messages on Tumblr to awkward messages on Skype, to eighteen hour conversations and constant texting, to living in a car together for three months on a roadtrip and then living in a car together for many more months while homeless (and a million other places in between), to moving in together and then holy shit we got married.
so I guess that one impulsive decision to make a shitpost sideblog at stupid o’clock in the morning when I was bored one summer has been the single most life-changing choice I’ve ever made.
37: Do opposites attract?
eh. I mean, yeah, sometimes? but similarities attract, too. I think for any kind of relationship to be successful you’ve kind of got to have an element of both, and I think that “opposites” usually refers to something very specific. for example, I don’t mind cleaning the bathroom and you hate it. that’s a useful kind of opposite, because it means a compromise neither of us feel cheated by. you’re unshakable when it comes to slogging through bureaucratic minutiae, and I’m a beast in high-stress quick-thinking scenarios. together we make a pretty unstoppable team, for being opposites in that regard. I think that’s kind of what’s meant by this saying, but unfortunately it seems to have been appropriated to mean “yes honey, I know you work 10 hour shifts and come home to find your partner hasn’t cleaned the house or done anything to help, but opposites attract!” or “my partner supports Trump and genuinely believes that vaccines and masks are a government conspiracy to control us all, and I am a normal human being, but opposites attract so I guess I’ll have to put up with it”. like no, kings and queens. that isn’t what it means. dump them.
38: Is your life what you expected it would be five years ago?
lmao no. not in the slightest. five years ago it would have been... just into 2016, and yeah, no. there is not a single thing about me right now that I would have predicted, aside from the general stuff that’s never changed about me. I had different ideas about what I would be doing for work, about what I’d be working towards; I had completely different levels of commitment and discipline to various tasks, and I certainly wasn’t planning an international move. I can at least say that I’m happier with my current plan than the one I used to have (it wasn’t a bad plan, it just no longer suits me) but there’s no way I would have expected this.
and of course, there’s the whole issue with the pandemic. five years ago I had no idea I would be living through a global natural disaster, and if you’d told me, I would have thought it would be something like a supervolcano eruption or a nuclear winter. like, I’m glad it’s not, but also “you have to stay in your house for over a year” still kind of sucks.
57: Do you thinks humans are obsessed with escapism (books, video games, movies, etc.)? Are you looking for an escape? Do you think that’s a bad thing?
I think we are sometimes, when things are tough and there’s a need to wish to escape (see how many books I read over quarantine in March, for example). most of the time, however, I think humans just like stories. I don’t think it’s any deeper than the fact that humans love stories, we’ve always loved stories, we’ve always loved telling and hearing stories, before we had books and archives we passed our stories down orally and we drew them on cave walls with our own fingers, and this love for the story has never changed or altered in the hundreds of thousands of years since. I think that’s the major driving force here.
right now I’m looking for an escape 24/7, because I’m sick to death of the real world. I don’t think that’s a bad thing at all. without books, without the fictional things I love, without reading and writing and music, I would have gone absolutely bonkers in 2020. being able to fall into a book or play around in the worlds I’ve created, both my own and things I’ve co-written with you, has literally saved my ass over the past eight months. escapism is never a bad thing. like anything, it only becomes troubling when it starts creating problems. but I do not think there’s any shame in occasionally saying “fuck it” and going to worry about someone else’s fictional problems for a while. 
72: Should people be prosecuted for crimes that weren’t considered crimes at the time?
this is a tough one. on the one hand I want to say no, because it could easily be abused. some asshole could get into power and make something illegal, and then round up all the people who have committed that now-crime and lock them up, and oh, would you look at that! all the people who have committed the now-crime just so happen to be the dictator’s biggest critics and threats, how convenient. 
at the same time, dictators are going to wipe out their enemies no matter how legal it is, and I also have to consider the fact that before WWII, for example, words like “genocide” and “crimes against humanity” didn’t exist. how could we decide that these things are crimes, but then not try those who literally gave cause for the crime to be acknowledged? we can hardly say “alright, genocide is now a crime against humanity, but because these guys did it before this was law they can’t be tried”. that’s just... not really a great precedent to set, you know?
so I suppose a tentative yes? I think it would probably depend entirely on the severity of the crime. for example, if they found out that... I don’t know, some normal everyday substance was something that people could suddenly get high off, and they declared it a drug, I don’t think everyone who’s ever sold it or used it should be rounded up and jailed. but like, if the act of cannibalism itself became a crime (and not just murder or desecration of a corpse, which is what “cannibalism” usually falls under in terms of legality) we should probably go round up all the people who are stealing human legs to eat, yanno?
91: Is hate as strong as love? Who do you hate?
sick totheark reference bro. anyway yeah, hate is as strong as love, though it appears and reacts in different ways. hate and love are two sides of the same coin, if you ask me. the deeper you love somebody, the harder you hate them if things go wrong. hate is betrayed love. something something, a tree’s branches cannot reach to heaven unless its roots reach to hell, and all that. something so powerful is going to leave a lot of damage if it goes wrong.
I hate a few people. I don’t want to go into detail as to their specific identities, because I’m sure that if you know me well, you’ll know who they are. both of them were people whom I loved very deeply, and who betrayed that love in ferociously cruel ways. both people taught me very difficult lessons about the nature of love, and how sometimes it really cannot conquer everything, but while this would be a nasty lesson to learn it’s compounded by the fact that I learned this not out of any kind of extraneous circumstance, but rather through their cruelty and their refusal to work with me, listen to me, or love me in the way I deserved to be loved. my hatred for these people will never go away, even though it certainly doesn’t dominate my life. it is there, though, and I can easily draw on it whenever I need it. should I get the opportunity, I have no doubt in my mind that I have the capacity to be very cruel to these people in my own right, and I won’t feel bad about it.
94: How would you describe yourself when you love? Do you love forcefully, unconditionally, gently, quietly, desperately?
oh damn. forcefully, conditionally, stubbornly, and probably slightly possessively.
I don’t show love in conventional means. I’m one of those stereotypes, I guess. I don’t like declarations of love, I don’t really go in for physical affection, and I’m not sappy at all. my love language is more subtle, but it’s there. I like to do things for people, I like to create things for/with people, I like to have adventures with people. that’s how I love, and I can be pretty forceful about it. I also want people to improve themselves as much as possible -- I think the greatest thing I can witness someone I love doing is becoming the best version of themselves, and I will support them 100% in this effort -- also very forcefully. I don’t think there are many people who could put up with that level of intensity for so long, if I’m honest. I demand a lot of the ones I love, but I also like to think I give a lot, too.
my love is never unconditional. while I believe unconditional love exists, I have never seen it. my love always comes with conditions -- conditions about how I expect to be treated, about ideology, about worldview. these are all huge deal breakers, of course -- my conditions aren’t vague, or petty, or small in any way. but there is nobody on earth, nor will there ever be, who I will not walk away from if I feel the relationship is harmful in any way. I might not stop loving them, but I sure as hell will not assume that my love for them will protect me from them.
at the same time I’m a very stubborn person when it comes to love. people will do things they think must break one of my conditions, but I’ll see something else in it and I’ll stick around even if we both think it’s useless. I’m never wrong, so I suppose I have that going for me. but I am very, very stubborn when it comes to love. I have a high level of endurance and I know how to nurture love; how to stop pessimism from setting in. I’m also slightly possessive, so I don’t let go of anything easily -- and this includes the people I love. I’ll never stifle a person, but I’ll definitely fight for them, and something something everything I’ve ever let go of has claw marks on it.
100: What belief do you have that isn’t logically grounded, but you still firmly believe in?
I suppose something like this could never be logically grounded because there’s no logical proof at all, and “I Just Know” is apparently not a scientific argument (it should be), but I know I’ve had past lives. I just do. I have no solid proof for this, only gut feelings and Just Knowing and weird memories and some crazy shit that I can’t explain -- like being able to find my way around a strange city because I remembered it from a past life, for example -- but I just know I’ve had many different lives before and I will have many more to come. this is just an unshakable belief and it always has been.
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mindswe-had · 3 years
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I was pretty stupid at twelve. Might get into the causes for that later, but long story short I got into self harming. Yeah, that wasn’t glorious. I never really planned on actually doing this, but I’ve come to realise a few people I know close to me have been having the same issues lately. And I can’t lie, it’s been pretty triggering for me getting into the details of why, how and when every time someone reaches out to me for help. So I figured why not just write about it. I guess here’s how I got out of it, and what keeps me going. Because I feel like no matter the what caused it to occur, self harming never is the only thing you’ve got left. Welcome to one of many unwritten therapy sessions.
Part one- please listen to me
I think, looking back, that one of the main reasons I got into self harming was I didn’t feel listened to. Or “left out”, as I would call it. I could’ve had dozens of friends around (which I did not anyway lol), I would’ve always felt alone. Well not alone, but lonely. And I remember even back then wishing so hard to have someone close to me, someone so persistent they would’ve gotten through the walls I was (subconsciously) building around myself. Having no one, or at least feeling like you don’t, can quickly become the start of an even deeper downfall. And that’s exactly what happened with me, but once again I am not getting into the details of this now.
So how do you make someone struggling with self harming actually FEEL like you’re there? I’d say first off, be available and let them know you are. But don’t insist on it, else it just feels like you’re trying to get them to tell you something. It starts with nothing, really. Even just sitting with them for a minute and asking about their day helps. Or just sit in silence with them if they let you, feeling someone’s presence can be extra comforting sometimes. Or watch with them that one show they like so much. Show them that you care always. Don’t be too intrusive, leaving the person their own space is key, but let them know you’re free for them whenever they need. No matter how hard you want to help someone that might be struggling, do not ever push them to talk about things they want to keep a secret. As long as you let them know you’re here and not going, you’re becoming sort of a safe space to them. And you do not always want to talk when in a safe space. So don’t ask questions, but listen instead. If they want to talk to you and feel safe enough with you they will. It never really is a one way thing though. Put some trust in them as well. Confide in them, even on the most little stuff. Inevitably that makes them feel somewhat valued, which is crucial when it comes to helping them trust you. Most importantly, it’s so incredibly hard becoming part of someone’s safe space without forcing yourself in. It takes so much time, gentleness and patience. Don’t blame yourself if they don’t talk to you right away. Some people can build the highest walls around themselves without even trying which can even make you feel rejected, but trust me there always is a way in if you’re patient enough. Always. Listen. Even silence can mean a lot if you listen hard enough.
Part two- alternatives?
One of the main things that helped me cope with self harming whenever I felt like doing it was finding alternatives for it. You can probably find a bunch online if you look them up, but for me what worked the most was writing. Well it was journaling really, but I’ve always hated the whole concept of a diary so I refuse to call it that. I used to have this old yellow copybook by my bedside I would grab pretty much every night, whenever I felt the urge to cut. And from there I’d just start writing about my day or whatever it was I had on my mind. Sometimes I’d copy quotes I liked (mainly from Grey’s are we surprised), sometimes I’d even just doodle. Whatever it was that kept my mind off cutting for a while. I think in a way I felt like writing about my own problems made them a little bit less heavy, and more real if that makes sense. On some days that would be enough to make the urge pass.
Music was also a great therapy for me. I’d literally sneak my old mp3 in bed and blast sad songs in my earphones at 2am. Sometimes I’d get so caught up I’d even get up and cry dance out to whatever it was I was playing. I used to do that until passing out of exhaustion most of the time and I actually loved it, it was such a great way to evacuate.
“Replacing the harm” was something I used to do as well to keep me from cutting. That was basically just replacing the harm caused by cutting by something that was technically a bit better. Still harmful but better. And for that most of the time I’d either do sports, eg running really hard until the sole of my feet was aching, or I’d just use the elastic method. That just consisted in keeping an elastic around my wrist at all times, most often a hair tie, and snapping it on my wrist or arm whenever I felt the need to take something out on myself. That worked wonders especially because it was so discreet I could use it whenever I felt the need to at any time of the day, which would always take a considerable amount off the buildup that would make me cut at night.
The butterfly method was also something I used on a few occasions. That just consisted in drawing butterflies on your arms (or wherever else it is you usually harm yourself) so that when you felt like cutting you’d see them and would be kept from doing it, because you’d metaphorically be cutting their wings off and killing them if you were to actually were to cut. I didn’t use that one often but it did help a few times. I found it also worked with writing names of people I loved (real of fictional), and basically any other doodle of an animal.
Once again though, these alternatives are only what worked for me and what I used the most when I was into self harming, most of them I still use even now as they’ve just stuck with me. But they’re far from being the only valid ones existing.
Part three- NEVER say don’t
That one is about to be very short, but do not ever tell a person who self harms not to self harm. It’s plain stupid, won’t make them stop and they probably already know it isn’t good for them. It’s also invalidating as hell and will only make them feel worse if they’re anything like me. Instead you can try and show understanding. I remember once a girl online told me something like “I won’t tell you to stop cutting because I know you won’t, but please make sure you at least clean up your wounds properly and get stitches if necessary”. And that honestly meant so much more than anyone could ever imagine. I didn’t feel blocked of forced to stop but accompanied and understood, which itself helped me a lot and if I’m being honest it was so unexpected her words have stuck to me to this day.
Part four- stop counting clean days
When self harming, I found a lot of people tend to count their clean days (dc’s) as a way to encourage themselves to recover (clean days being days during which you don’t self harm). I did it as well, that for a very long time. It only makes you feel like pure shit when you relapse. Because inevitably there ARE relapse days during recovery, which is something practically no one talks about. You don’t just snap out of it you know? Every time I’d relapse I’d just look at my previous clean days count and think to myself the most horrible stuff. Let’s say I had just broke off a 12dc’s, I wouldn’t sit there and be proud of myself for lasting so long, instead I’d just tell myself “Wow see? You went so far up for nothing. You’ll never recover so why bother trying anyway” and that itself would trigger a urge to go even harder on myself. The moment you stop counting clean days is the moment you allow yourself to heal, slowly but surely, even if you can trip a little down the road there.
Part five- people you relate to
One last thing I can think of that helped me with self harming was finding people I was seeing myself in, somehow. I’m thinking personally of Amelia from Grey’s Anatomy/Private Practice who had a drug problem, and mostly a YouTuber called Johanna Cadence. Ana used to make videos on YouTube mainly talking about her own depression, suicide attempt(s) and self harming issues. Sometimes they were just videos of her rambling, sometimes they were art videos, sometimes poetry readings. Whatever it was she put out, even song covers, would comfort me. We basically grew up together. She was always so different from me yet we were similar in a lot of ways, and I always admired her so much for that. By the time I started watching her her channel was called Howsenselessdeath Howpreciouslife, but she’s renamed it to Universal Hobo since then I believe. Most of her early videos are still up if you scroll far enough.
My point with this is, find yourself people who make you feel like you belong. They don’t have to be Amelia from Grey’s or Ana from YouTube, there are plenty of people out there, but finding yourself someone that represents to you what those people were to me undeniably helps, in a huge way.
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mcrmadness · 4 years
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🌺💘🌷 GET TO KNOW YOUR MUTUALS TAG 🌷💘🌺
Rules: When you get this, it means someone wants to know more about you, so list 5 things about yourself you want your followers to know! They can be as simple as your age or as complex as your deepest fear, as long as it’s something you’re comfortable with sharing. When you’re done and if you want to, send this to 10 people you want to get to know better!
Tagged by: @cats-crushesandhistory, thank you!!! Tagging: @stufenlosregelbar, @hanhan156, @charlotte-lancer, @autumnrebel, @cupcakecurl, @lycanrvc, - six is enough for now. I’m probably forgetting about basically everyone, I literally had to go through these by letters because I can never remember anything when I should make a list and I still feel bad for not including _everyone. But I decided to include only those who I have interacted with at least a little bit - I literally don’t dare to speak to anyone unless they tell me first that I am allowed to approach them. I also did not tag anyone who I haven’t seen doing these tag games or who I don’t know if they like these or not. And all of you can also just skip this if this is not your cup of tea.
***
I can never write anything short (surprise...) so I’ll just give you a short list here and you can click the read more link and see more of my thoughs on each topic there.
I am a teetotaler and I have never even tried alcohol. I also don’t and have never smoked and I stay the f* away from drugs, too.
I love cats. Like, for real, they’re the best thing in this whole world.
I love all animals overall, and I am actually a horse groom, I have a the “Vocational Qualification in Horse Care and Management”, specializing in harness racing, and I have worked with horses for over 10 years so far.
As a kid, I was a huge dinosaur nerd and I still love them.
I love comics and I have also drawn comics since I was a kid. I still have all of my old comics saved. Lately I haven’t been drawing even nearly as much and only fanart, tho. Drawing is fun but I simultaneously love and hate it.
Lol it seems I have love for everything but humans :D:D:D:D:D:D I didn’t even realize that before making this list looooooooool XD But yeah, more rambling under the cut :D But thanks for reading, if you end up reading it.
1. I am a teetotaler and I have never even tried alcohol. I also don’t smoke (and never have) and I avoid drugs - so much so that I don’t know if getting ADHD medication would break this “rule” of mine because they are made from the same stuff as one well-known drug...
I think it started as me just being so “lawful” all the time and the legal drinking age in Finland is 18, so I wanted to follow the rules at all times so I didn’t even think about drinking before the age of 18 and I was often very much shocked by other teens who did that, and I also remember being really worried when my best friend started experimenting with alcohol as a teenager. Despite the legal drinking age being 18, basically everyone here still started (and starts?) drinking between the ages of 13 and 15. So at school, from Monday to Wednesday, all that happened was overhearing the drunk stories of other kids. And from Wednesday to Friday, it changed to them discussing their plans for the next weekend. It was like this every week. And I never could wrap my head around it (I spent my weekends at home being happy that I could have free time and play The Sims 2 or something).
Then at some point I guess I just felt like I don’t even need alcohol for having fun and I still haven’t felt like that, and I don’t think I ever will either. When I turned 18, I was super annoyed by everyone because EVERYONE asked me “So you’re turning 18, did you plan on going to a bar?” and I would always answer something like “I don’t even drink (alcohol) so why would I?” and what still annoys me a little is people telling me “That’s good. That’s a good decision, drinking is bad.” and like... if you really think so, why do you drink yourself, then?
2. I love cats. Maybe that is partially visible from my blog too but I really, really love cats, and for decades my favorite animal has been tiger. When I was born, we had already 3 cats in the house and the last one of them died when I was almost 13 (he would have turned 16 that year). Before I moved out at the age of 23, there was not a single day without cats and currently my parents have 4 (plus a dog). I am still dreaming of my own cat but I can’t take one now because animals are not allowed in my flat but whenever I move out of this, I will choose one with pets allowed and I will adopt a cat. Most likely a rescue cat if I can find one, or even two so they can keep each other company. As cute as kittens are, adult cats are also important and need homes.
3. I also love animals overall. I actually like them more than humans (but technically humans are just apes so they’re my least favorite animal, then) and when I was 7-years-old, whenever I was asked about my dream job, I always said or wrote “I don’t know, probably something to do with animals!” And since my teens I have had lots of different ideas for jobs but when I was 25, I graduated as a horse groom. And have been (on-off) working with horses for over 10 years now (currently unemployed). Originally I chose the horse work because I was so pissed by the capitalist system and the thought of an office job or job at a grocery store and such was just... ew, no, never! So I chose horses because if I have to work, then I will do something useful and someone’s gotta take care of the animals too and I love animals, and animal work doesn’t feel like work but more like a lifestyle, so I’ve been basically fooling the system AND myself by that. Sometimes I also dream of the work as a zookeeper.
4. As a kid, I was a huge dinosaur nerd and I still love them (Land Before Time FTW). With my siblings we had a huge collection of dinosaur toys and I also have always loved evolution and genetics, so what we did was to give an individual name for every dinosaur we had. And we knew the species of each of them, and we knew so many facts about them too. Each dino also had their own personality and we even created family trees for them. There were generations of these dinos and we also created this “growing up order” which meant we put them all standing next to each other, usually under my brother’s bed because we had so many of them and they didn’t fit anywhere else lol, from the youngest/smallest to the oldest. And our biggest mission, that never got finished, was “The Big Play” which was us playing that the ancestor parents aka the oldest and biggest of our toys were born and we would play with them and play how they grow older and eventually start having their own kids - who were the next generation in our “growing up order” :D
No wonder why I still love playing The Sims games, especially TS3! (I even have a Finnish simsblog.) Lots of the things I have done and loved as a kid still live so strong in me, they just come out differently than what they did then. Imagination and toys changed to video games, especially The Sims (but I did play video games a lot as a kid too) and my love for genetics and evolution is still really strong.
5. I love comics. My favorite comic book character of all times is Garfield - he’s a cat and I grew up with cats so obviously I fell in love with the Garfield comics too, and I grew up with them as well. My mom subscribed to the Finnish Garfield comic in the early 90s and I have full volumes starting from the year 1994. I also have lots and lots of earlier comics and I always hunt for them from second-hand shops and I don’t have too many of them missing anymore, and I’m really proud of my collection. I also collect Lucky Luke, Rantanplan and Asterix - I have almost all of the (Finnish publications of) Lucky Lukes and Rantanplan.
I have also always loved drawing and I drew my first actual comic when I was 9 or 10 years old. Before that I had been drawing lots of “image series”, one image per paper. I still have all my old comics here in a drawer and I have had so many different characters and majority of them have had endless “plots” aka no plots whatsoever :D Before I actually never drew humans, I started drawing human portraits as fanart when I was 16 and the first human comic characters I drew (also as a fanart) when I was 18 or so. Before that everything was animals of some sort - I have had ants, flies, dogs, cats, birds... even ghosts at some point, and I also created one very simple anthropomorphic creature just so that it was easy to draw and I could concentrate on drawing clothes and hair. Oh my god I loved drawing hairdos to these, and so often I had one female “main character” and I gave her a “growth spurt” where I just drew her in different ages until she was “adult” and I continued telling about her life as an “adult”. Very often these differen phases were literally phases, there were soooooo many different styles each just for one year :D Then at some point I started coming up with actual ideas and plots instead of just drawing whatever I felt like drawing. I still draw comics nowadays, but those are mainly fanart and I haven’t drawn about OC’s in years and currently I have no active ones (except for the “self-comics” about my deep thoughts etc.) and I don’t know how to create new ones, I just have no creativity unless it’s provoked by a fandom thing or when I get a base like The Sims 3 where I don’t have an empty canvas but am given the tools for creating something new.
It might be fun to share some of my old comics here one day but this blog isn’t really an “art blog”, even tho I post some of my drawings occassionally. But let me know if you’d like to see some and maybe I will make a post about that in the future.
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franeridart · 5 years
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Anon said: Um so hello, I’m just here to say keep up the awesome work, I love your kiribaku art and it’s adorable and I go on binges through your blog (omg I sound so creepy I’m sorry I just love ur art so much) and it makes my day so yeah please keep drawing!
Ahhhhh you don’t sound creepy at all, don’t worry!!!!! Thank you so much for liking my stuff that much!!!!!!! <3<3
Anon said: May ask what kiri///mina would look like in your style? You don't have to draw it if you don't like the ship.
Gosh sorry but I really really don’t ship it!
Anon said: you know how I miss?? your OCs!!! they're the cutest!!
AWE thank you so much!!!!!!! I have a few comics planned for them, hope I’ll manage getting to them soon enough!!! (oT^T)9<3
Anon said: This is so sappy but some of your kiribaku posts really make me really appreciate long relationships! I’ve always found pining and crushes the cutest bc it’s full of intense feelings, but you portray being in love and accepting each other so well!! it’s amazing how you show characters interacting with each other and being so comfortable instead of worrying about hiding part of themselves and long story short I love your art and ideas so much
This ask!!!!!!!!! means the universe!!!!!!!!!! to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m so glad I can manage portraying love in such a way, I’m so in love with the idea of open, accepting love, andI try seriously hard to make it look healthy in my comics so!!!!!!! thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have no clue how many times I’ve reread this ask I’m not even exaggerating TT^TT <3
Anon said: I just want to start off by saying you’re my favourite blog on tumblr, your art is incredibly adorable and always makes my day!! I was just wondering how you were able to create your own unique art style? It’s something I’ve been struggling with a lot lately with my own art. Any advice is appreciated, thanks for everything you do!!
I think it’s about finding the right spot between what feels comfortable for you and the end you’re using your art for? In my case what’s comfortable is something fun and smooth, and the main end has always been to be able to draw comics - I’ve always liked comics because I like writing and I like drawing, but my attention span was too short to manage finishing them, and the way I had of drawing was too stiff to properly convey emotions the way I wanted to, which made drawing comics sound like an impossible dream haha I fixed it by simplifying my style, by taking away or reducing to the bare minimum everything that took me ages to work out/draw and pushing my expressions and body language to extremes to make up for the lack of details. 
That’s just my experience with it, though! The best advice I can give you is to sit back and look at your current way of drawing from an objective perspective - do you enjoy it? Is the process of drawing something you’re comfortable with? What’s uncomfortable in it for you, and in which ways could you change it to make it comfortable and fun? Does your current art style allow you to do what you want to do with your art? If you want to paint, does it allow you to paint in an easy and fun way? If you want to make comics, does it allow you the range to properly portray a character moving and living without making you wish you’d never started drawing halfway through it? 
Imho the first step to find a style that’s your own and feels right is to find a style that’s fun to use and doesn’t stress you to hell and back every time you pick up your pencil. This is easier to do the more things you attempt, so for a bit being inconsistent in style is a good and normal thing - try things out! The best one for you will definitely stick in the end. And if you already feel comfortable with the way you have of drawing, then hell! You already have a style that works for you! Just because to you it doesn’t look unique and special it doesn’t mean that it isn’t - if you asked me to point out what makes my style unique I wouldn’t be able to tell you either, the way I see it my style is the most uninteresting and common-looking style out there. To be honest with you that’s probably just how it is for every artist out there hahaha
Anon said: Hi!! I love your art and just want you to know I always get a big, stupid smile on my face whenever I see you cross my feed, whether it’s something new or a reblog of an old post. Everything you do is just amazing and I love it
AHHHHHHH Thank you so so much!!!!!!!!! (TT^TT)<3<3<3
Anon said: Hey Fran! First off, thank you for the Fire Force art. I remembered to actually check it out, after seeing it lol. Second, I still can't find your Fatgum 😭😭 the link didn't give any, and searching on your page didn't help either. I WILL FIND IT ONE DAY
I think it’s a problem of the app orz I can see him just find from desktop but the app can’t find him either T-T stupid app!
Anon said: Do you have a mini Bakugou and Kirishima living in your head? Are they just living their lives up in your brain and that causes your hand to to write and draw the most perfect and accurate things? Of course mini Kaminari, Sero, Mina, Jirou, etc. also come to visit your head hole from time to time and just chill with mini Baku and Kiri. That’s the only logical explanation on how all your Bakushima content is so inconceivably spot on
That’s such a kind thing of you to say, anon!!!!!! I’m glad you find them that IC!!!!!! I try my best, but sometimes I admit I just have them do and say stuff I’ve done and said myself, the only difference is that I word things in a way that feels right for their usual way of talking hahaha
Anon said: I personally would love to read your essay on why bakugo is the best character ever because I really really really want to love him that much but i feel like there's something that I'm just not getting about him- there's something I'm missing about his personality (keeping in mind that i kinda left the manga after the whole mirio/8 precepts arc). I've always found bakugo compelling and would love love love to read your take on him! Hope you have a great day!
Bakugou has had some amazing character development scenes after the overhaul arc!!!!! He’s outright shown he understands where he was lacking and where he was wrong, that he’s perfectly capable of working in a team and letting people help him and helping them in return, that he cares about his class and how the rest of the world sees them! (and that he worries/cares about how the world sees him too, actually, that broke my heart a bit ;; ) We haven’t seen him in a hot minute by now, but most of anything before the current arc has had him improve and develop and become even better than he already was -  I’ve always thought him a good guy with just a lot of troubles relating to the world around him due the way he has been brought up as special and different (it creates a drift between yourself and the rest of the world when everyone around you keeps treating you as if you were other - when you tell a kid he’s different and better for his whole life he’s bound to grow up believing it, after all), but if the problem you have with him is that he isn’t showing the good in himself plainly and obviously enough, then the arcs after the overhaul one are gonna help you like him better, definitely
Well, the thing about Bakugou is that he’s not a plain/obvious character, so you need to think about his actions and his words a bit more, and can’t just take him at face value - it’s what I like about him, actually! How much you need to think about him to figure him out on a deeper level than just the surface one. Since I dunno why you like him and why you feel something’s missing, I can’t tell you specifically what it is in the way I see him that completes him for me, but as I said I try to keep him as IC as I can so probably reading my comics about him might help you understand the way I see him. To me Bakugou’s honest, and kind, and loving, but he’s also arrogant, and angry, and used to taking some things for granted, and I like how all those things work with and against each other in his character. He’s at the same time incredibly proud and absurdly insecure, and I like that about him too - where each comes from and where and how they clash, I like the complexity it gives him. I like that he’s a people person in the sense that he likes having people around himself, and I like that at the same time UA is the first time he’s had actual, honest to god best friends, and how that means that he’s gonna be awkward when usually he’s so sure and proud simply because he isn’t used to having people he actually specifically cares for, I very much like that about him. I like that he overthinks everything he doesn’t immediately gets, I like that he still acts on instincts more often than not, I like that somehow with him those two aren’t mutually exclusive. I like that he’s smart and still so damn dumb, I like that he’s just as simple-minded as he is an actually labyrinth in thought process, I like how one-track minded he is even on the most silly things - how once he sets his eyes on a goal he goes for it like his life depends on it. I like that he’s barsh and rude and impulsive in what he says and does, but when he fucks up he knows he fucked up, and he backstracks, and he does his best to make amends. I like that he sits in stupid ways and has the worst posture in the class and then he wears his hero costume and suddenly he’s a model on the catwalk, that’s so damn endearing to me. I like how ridiculously hyperbolic he is and how he just assumes people will get it, get what he actually means, like there’s a point between his brain and his mouth were things get blown out of proportion and he doesn’t even realize it. There’s just so many things to love about him, for me!! 
But most importantly I like that he started as low as he could get and that because of it his plot is a one way towards the summit. I like it. I like watching a character grow and every new chapter become a better version of themselves, I love it. Ultimately that’s probably why he’s my favorite, after all haha
Anon said: Hi, this isn’t a question but I just wanted to say how much I love your art and the way you clearly appreciate Bakugou as a character. So many of my friends hate him, but I think he has a lot of depth and so much potential. Your art always makes me smile! Thanks for doing what you do. :)
THANK YOU and thank you for liking the boy too!!!!!!! He deserves it, he absolutely does deserve it!!!!!!! <3<3<3
Anon said: I just went digging in the archives of my blog (which is.. a mess) and found some old art of yours (like... I'm talking bokuto and kuroo level old) and g o s h. I already loved your art so much then and I still do n hhhhhhhh u go. U great.
Gosh you’ve been around a long time then!!!!! Thank you so much for sticking with me all this time!!!! ✨o(TT0TT)o✨
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for-fucks-sake-h · 5 years
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Smooth Operator: Part Two
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Word Count: 6.7k // Rated: M, mature // Story Page
*Y/N’s texts are in italics. Harry’s texts are in bold.*  
The oc version of this story can be found on Wattpad. 
*** 
“I’ll do the chicken tostadas, thanks.” Y/N spoke as she handed the waitress her menu.  
“I don’t think we’ve been out like this in months,” Bec said with a smile.  
The girls had reservations at a mexican spot they loved, skipping their usual Saturday brunch for a late Saturday dinner. The restaurant had great food, even better margaritas, and a really cool, eclectic atmosphere.  
“Cheers!” El raised her drink to the center of the table, “To us, and finally being done with this bloody case!”  
They were all smiling as they clinked their glasses.  They just finished a huge case that they had been working on for weeks now. It had Y/N super stressed and high strung for a while, but paid off in the end with a positive outcome for them.  
They were joking and laughing until their eyes were watering while they waited for their food. Y/N felt good being out for a change. Enjoying a nice dinner with her friends, being able to unwind a bit. It was good for her. She always felt like she was in work mode but she needed to have time to just enjoy the moment like this. Going out to dinner didn’t seem like much but it was for her.  
They thanked their waitress when she brought their entrees out and ordered another round of drinks. The table was quiet for a few moments as they dug into their food as if they had each been starving for days.  
Y/N’s phone suddenly lit up on the table with a soft ping, making all three of their eyes flick over to it but not thinking much of it. Until it did the same thing again less than a minute later.
“Alright, what happened to the no phone policy while we’re eating?” El said with a smile. “You guys nearly ripped my head off last time.”
“That’s because you’re always on yours. We made the rule for you,” Bec says with a mouthful of her taco.  
El gives Bec the side eye before jutting her chin out quickly in the direction of where the phone was sitting, “Is that him?”  
Y/N was quiet as a small smile pulled at her lips, leaning forward to read the messages on her lock screen.  
Enjoy your night out  
Hopefully we can talk later if you’re not too tired x   
She really tried to fight the insistent smile that was forming as she slid her phone into her purse with a quick “mhm” as a response to her friends.  
Y/N had been texting Harry consistently for a few weeks now. They have some sort of exchange nearly every day. Sometimes it’s just a few quick messages back a forth wishing each other a good day. Other times she’s telling him a full blown story of chasing Rocco down the street when his leash slipped out of her hand. Or Harry is complaining about a miserable customer that doesn't understand why he can’t fix their laptop after it fell in the bathtub.   
A couple days have passed here and there when they haven’t texted and she finds herself wondering what he’s doing. Just as quickly as a thought of him snuggled up on his couch forms a picture in her mind, she dismisses it. She has no idea what he looks like and she certainly has no idea how he cuddles on a couch.
But she likes talking to him. Their conversations are easy and he’s funny with his dry humor and corny jokes. It’s hard not to like him and his company. But again, whenever she starts to think like that she shakes her head at herself. She doesn’t have his company. Texting can hardly equate to that and she thinks the more she focuses on that fact, the better off she’ll be.
She finds herself battling with this a lot though. She feels like she’s getting to know Harry but also feels like she doesn’t know him at all. Not really. How much could she possibly get to know him in this capacity? How much would she want to? How would she feel if she gets too attached? This is his job. He does this with plenty of other people. What makes her think that the way they talk is so special?
She can’t deny the little sliver of happiness she feels when she gets a message from him though.
“So you’ve been talking a lot, huh?” Bec asks.
“Yeah, we have. He’s really nice.”
“Nice?” El replies, one of her eyebrows raising in question.   
“Yup,” Y/N confirms, popping the end of the word dramatically.
“Alright, spill bitch!” El said with a smile.  
Y/N chuckled, “There isn’t much to spill. He’s nice. I like talking to him.”
“Okay so why do you seem so solemn about it then?” Bec questioned.  
Y/N stuffed a bite of food into her mouth to give herself a second to think before answering. “I’m not. I’m just… cautious. I like talking to him, maybe a little too much for my own good.”
“You’re worried about getting attached?” El asked.  
“Well, yeah. You’re suppose to make connections, right? Well it’s kind of hard to know where to draw the line of how connected you get. Like, I want to get to know him but I feel I should also keep my guard up.”
“Nothing wrong with that. I just want you to have fun. It’s supposed to be fun. Enjoy yourself! Try not to worry so much.” El spoke with a smile. She had a way of comforting Y/N, confirming the things she already knows but lets her brain worry herself too much anyway.  
She knows El is right. She definitely worries about things that she has no control over, things that are so far down the line that they shouldn’t even be a focus yet. She has no reason to be worrying about getting close to Harry. Is she really going to hold herself back when she hasn’t even really given herself a chance to experience him?
“Hard to shut my brain off,” Y/N smiled. She felt lucky to have friends that she could talk to about anything and never worry about them judging her or thinking differently of her. “But you’re right.”  
“Of course she is,” Bec says over a mouth full of food. “So have you talked on the phone with him yet?”
“Not yet. Honestly he hasn’t really tried to initiate it. He seems fine with texting.” Y/N says with a furrowed brow. She did think it was a little odd that Harry was so willing to text her. He never asked her to call him and never turned the conversation sexual unless she gave the opening.
When she gave it though, he jumped. He excited her, just his messages made her skin tingle. She would be lying if she said she wasn’t a little antsy to know what it would be like to actually talk to him. To hear him say the filthy things he texted her. To know what his voice sounded like when he told her how bad he wanted her or what a moan sounded like when he was so turned on he couldn’t keep it in. She’s listened to his voice memo more times than she would ever admit.   
“You probably have to call him. Wait, you aren’t getting charged for the texting, are you?” Bec asks with wide eyes.
“No no, you only get charged for the calls.” Y/N laughed. “Maybe you’re right. I don’t know, there’s still a little part of me that is weirded out by it. I think he likes texting me and that doesn’t cost anything. But calling him, having to pay for it, feels a bit sleazy if I’m honest.”
“Please, it’s no different than buying porn. If he felt exploited in any way he wouldn’t be doing it.” El brushes off quickly.  
Y/N shrugs at the thought. “Yeah, true.”
“Are you still nervous to talk to him?” Bec asks.  
“A little. Just the unknown, you know? I want him to like it too. I think that’s why it feels sleezy, the thought of him doing it and not being into it is just, bleh.” Y/N gags onto her finger for the extra effect, making her friends laugh with her.  
“I get that. But you’re a smart girl, Y/N. I think you would be able to tell if he was into it or not.” El laughs.  
“Or he’s just really good at his job,” Y/N challenged with one lifted brow.  
“Are you looking for excuses?” Bec laughs.  
“Maybe…” Y/N smiles down at her plate.  
She could admit that she may have been looking for every reason not to call Harry. She felt like she was damned if she did and damned if she didn’t. They could talk and she could love it. Scary. They could talk and not really have a connection over the phone. Boo, that sucks. It’s over as quickly as it started.  
“I think you need to stop worrying and go for it. What’s the worst that could happen?” Bec says, quickly adding, “Don’t answer that,” when she sees Y/N open her mouth to list all the negative outcomes.  
Y/N laughs before changing the subject to a guy Bec is currently talking to, immediately getting a full blown story of how she’s over him already because she heard he’s a player. They enjoy the rest of the night without any more talk of Harry, finishing off two more margaritas before they call it a night after being there for nearly four hours.   
On the car ride home, Y/N stared down at her phone. Specifically her text thread with Harry. She wants to talk to him even though the thought has her heart beating wildly. If her heart beats like this just thinking about it what is it going to be like if she actually talks to him. But she has to know. She needs to experience it, even if it’s only once. Even if she’s playing it up in her head and it’s nothing how she thinks it will be. She thinks that would be better than her continuing to wonder.
I’m in the uber now. Maybe I can call you once I’m home… if you’re up to it?
Harry glanced at his phone on the couch cushion next to him when he heard the ping, his heart dropping to his stomach. He quickly sent back “of course” before tossing his phone back to the couch and running his hands through his hair.  He leaned back, pushing his head back to the top of the cushion and stretching his legs out as he combed through his hair repeatedly.
Relax, he thought.
He lifted his head slowly before whispering, “relax,” down to the organ that was already pulling blood from the rest of his body in need.   
He had to calm down but he was so excited. He’s been thinking about this since he first talked to Y/N. Every time they talk and she puts an lol in her message he wonders what her laugh sounds like. He wonders how she says words like water and caramel. If her voice is high and sweet or low and raspy. Every time she replies with a mmm fuck to some filthy thought he shares with her, he feels like he’s in pain with how much he wants to actually hear her say it. 
He stands quickly from the couch, jumping up and down as if he’s getting ready for a boxing match. Shaking his arms out as if that could possibly help loosen him up. His cock was twitching in his pants at the possibilities this call held. He reaches down to smooth his hand over himself, foolishly thinking that if he gave the pulsing some attention it would calm down.  
He leaned down to check his phone again, seeing that Y/N read his reply but hasn’t answered yet. He turned his tv off, flicked his front hall lights off before going to the kitchen to grab a water bottle and head upstairs.  
He stood in his bathroom looking at himself in the mirror as he gulped down half the bottle. Breathing heavily when he pulled it away from his lips, a mixture of how quickly he sucked the water down and how the anticipation pulsed through his veins.  
He washed his face and rubbed some face cream into his skin with shaky hands. Quickly finishing up in the bathroom and heading to his room. He stood at the foot of his bed as he checked his phone again. Still nothing.
He walked to the side of his bed, placing his phone on the nightstand before turning on the tv that was mounted on the wall across from the bed.  He pulled his t shirt over his head and removed his joggers before slipping into bed. What’s taking her so long?  
His cheeks already felt warm, making him shake his head at himself as he sunk down further in the bed. He flicked through the channels to try to distract himself. Minutes passing like hours as he waited, finally hearing a ping twenty minutes later.  
I’m nervous lol
He smiled at her message, his brain conjuring up the laugh he pretended he knew every time she wrote lol.  
It’s okay. I am too
Really?
Definitely. But I’m excited too.
How excited??  
He let out a deep breath followed by a soft chuckle.
Gotta call me to find out xx  
He watched the message turn to read and waited.  A few minutes passed with him just staring at the phone until he realized he was whispering a quiet “come on” to the screen.
And then it lit up, causing the warmth of his skin to ignite as well. He took a deep breath and slowly exhaled before accepting the call.  
“Hiii,” he spoke quietly, extending the greeting.    
It was quiet for a second before he heard a low hum followed by an even lower, “Hey,” come through the receiver.  
His heart was already racing but somehow picked up speed at that one word. He was way more nervous then he let on. Maybe even more then he even realized himself.  
“Alright?” he asked with a small laugh.  
“I was wondering what you would sound like when you say that.” Y/N replied with a laugh of her own.
“How I say alright?”  
“Yeah, you say it a lot.” She chuckles softly, the sound making his heart flutter all over again.  
“Wanna make sure you’re alright,” he replies lowly.  
“I know. Always checking on me. I like it,” she finished softly.  
“Good.” The line is quiet for a few seconds before he continues, “How was dinner?”
“Great, had three margaritas,” she laughed. “Think they gave me the balls I needed to finally call you.”  
He laughed, liking the way she talked quickly, ignoring how the way she said balls made his cock twitch again.  
He hummed before answering, “’m glad you called. You’re not drunk?”  
“No, I’m… happy.”  
“Didn’t know happy was a drinking level. Sober, buzzed, drunk, they’re the usual ones,” he teased.  
She laughed, “Yeah of course. Happy is around buzzed, like when you’re just starting to feel good and warm.”  
“Ahh, I see,” he says with a chuckle. “Tha’s good t’know.”    
The line goes quiet for another few seconds before Y/N huffs, “I’m sorry I’m being weird.”  
“You’re not being weird. This is a weird situation. Jus’ gotta relax,” He assures her. “Tell me where you are. Or what you’re wearing.”
“Really,” she giggles. “I didn’t know you were so cliche,” she says through a laugh.  
He chuckles, smiling goofily at the way she teases, “Come on, it’ll help. Get you in the moment.”  
“Hmm okay,” she says.  He can hear shuffling before she continues, “I’m in bed.”  
“Sexy,” he interupts, making her bark out a laugh. His pulse quickens at the sound, smiling at the way she giggles around an apology. “And what are you wearing?”  
“A tee shirt,” she says softly before it’s quiet again.
“Tha’s it?”  His heart beat picks up at the thought of her in laying in bed with her phone pressed to her ear in nothing but a shirt. He has no idea what she looks like but it doesn’t matter, his brain forms the picture in his head and his cock pulses at the thought.  
She confirmed with a quiet “mhm” that makes his pulse pick up even more. He could hear his heart beating it was so hard.     
“Fuck,” he whispered.  
“What?” She questioned and the way she sounded so innocent, like she had no idea what he was thinking made his cock jump.  
“That is… so sexy,” he says as he mutes the tv, wanting to only hear her voice.  
“Is it?” She whispers, her pulse racing, the tingles between her thighs becoming stronger with every word he says.  
“I think so. Do you always sleep like that?” He asks, his voice lowering an octave with the question.  
Y/N swallows thickly before answering, “Usually.”  
She can hear his breathing and the way he whispers, “You’re killing me” makes her cheeks burn.  
The line is quiet again apart for the sound of each other’s breathing. Harry knows she’s nervous but he wants to be sure this is actually what she wants before he goes any further with the conversation.  
“Love, if you’re not comfortable with this yet just say the word.”
“No, no, I am,” she says quickly.  
“You sure? I don’t wan’ you to feel like we have to do this now. ’m perfectly fine with texting you. Textin’ is free,” he trails off.  
He hates the thought of her even remotely feeling forced into anything. She’s being charged for every minute of this call, and he knows it’s a pretty penny. If she’s even the slightest bit uncomfortable it’s not worth her time or money.  
“No I want to,” she says. “I want you,” she says in a soft tone.
Harry exhales deeply, “Fuck, good. Want you too. ‘m so hard,” he says lowly.  
His admission has her pressing her thighs together more. She knows she’s soaked already and he’s barely said anything, the anticipation of it all getting her wound up.  
“Really?” she whispers.  
“So hard. You had my cock twitching when you first asked to call.” He speaks honestly as he slips his hand into his boxers, the contact making him swallow thickly and suck in a breath.    
“God,” she moans quietly. The sound makes Harry’s stomach clench deeply, a soft moan of his own following. “Are you gonna touch it?”
He smiles at how she avoids the word, “Touch what, love?”
“Your cock,” she says softly.  
“Mhm, already am. Wish I wasn’t though. Would much rather be touching you,” he says, his breathing picking up as he strokes his hand from his base to his tip. 
“Oh my god,” Y/N whispers, finally reaching down to slip her fingers through her wet folds. Her clit is swollen, sending tingles throughout her body as she grazes her middle finger down the length of it before circling her entrance. “Shit,” she gasps quietly.  
“Yeah, touch yourself for me love,” Harry says in a strained voice. He sweeps his thumb over his tip, circling his precum over his head, making him release a breathy moan. He pulls the phone away from his mouth as he collects some spit before wrapping his hand around himself again, pumping his cock slowly.   
“Fuck,” she moans quietly as she pulls her wetness up to her clit.  
“Gonna rub your clit ‘til you come?” His voice is so deep, even deeper than it was when he first answered and definitely deeper than the voice memo she listened to repeatedly. His voice was having the same effect on her that she thinks his breath fanning across her skin would as it caused goosebumps to raise and her stomach to clench.  
“Yes,” she moans. “Oh my god.”
“That’s it,” he encourages, the rhythm of his strokes increasing with her pants. She sounds so good, breathing heavily with quiet moans and whines gracing his ears periodically. Everything she says is breathy with a small whine at the end and it makes Harry’s cock throb with every word.  
She’s rubbing small circles into her clit as she listens to him moan on the other line, each moan making her core clench with need. She hasn’t been this wet in ages, her fingers easily slipping over her skin and making her body go warm as she brings her orgasm to the surface with every flick.  
“Fuck,” Harry gasps. “‘m so close, love.”  
His words spur Y/N on, wanting to hear him come. She rocks her hips up to her hand as if he was there, as if he was between her legs and pushing into her over and over again.
“Yes, yes,” she chants softly, making Harry’s cock pulse and a groan come from deep in his chest as he pumps himself faster.  
“Play with your nipples, Y/N. Need you to come for me. Come on,” he urges lowly, knowing from previous texts that her nipples are sensitive, hoping it’ll push her over the edge.
“Fuck, oh my god,” she moans deeply. She does as she’s told, tucking her phone between her shoulder and ear so that she can snake her hand under the hem of her shirt. Her cold fingers flick her nipple quickly, sending chills down her spine. A stark contrast to the warm fingers that rub her clit. “Fuck, I... Harry,” she gasps his name before another moan falls from her lips as she squeezes her eyes shut, her core clenching rapidly as she comes.    
“Shit. Yes, that’s it,” Harry breathes out as he listens to beautiful moans fall from her mouth. He pumps his hand quickly until a low “fuck” and guttural moan comes from his chest and he’s painting his stomach with his release.
They both pant harshly as they come down. Y/N stretches across her bed as she chuckles with a quiet, “Shit,” gasped into the phone that gets Harry laughing.  
“Y‘alright?” He asks with a smile.  
She hums in response, “Are you?”
“Fuckin’ great,” he chuckles. “You’re amazing.”  His heart flutters from his admission, feeling a warm blush travel up his neck and onto his cheeks.  
“So are you,” she says softly. “I hate to just end this but… you know...”  
“No, I totally understand,” he interupts. “I really enjoyed it. Hope you did too.”
“I definitely did.”
He speaks then in a low, almost somber tone, “Night, love.”  
“Goodnight, Harry.” She whispers softly.   
Harry tosses his phone onto the other pillow as he gets out of bed to clean up. This is new. He wanted to keep talking to her. Usually, he’s perfectly fine with getting off the phone once he finished and passing out quickly after. But he feels like he could have stayed on the phone with her for another hour just listening to her talk in that post-orgasm voice.  
As he got back into bed with a low groan he noticed a message.  
We can still text, right?
Fuck, how did such a simple message like that make his heart race?
Absolutely.  
Good. I like texting you.  
Me too
And I like getting off with you
God I like getting off with you
So you’re happy with your service? :)
Very
Narcissist lol  
Ha! Just making sure my customer is happy love  
Your customer is very happy
And still soaked    
Harry groaned at her message, his cock twitching at the thought of her being soaked from him.  
They texted until the late hours of the night, coaxing each other to another orgasm. Messages talking about everything they liked from the phone call. Harry telling Y/N that her moans made his dick throb just thinking about them and her telling him that the way he says fuck makes her pussy clench. Their messages were even more intense now that they could use things the other person does to rile them up more.  
It was nearly 3am when they said their real good nights with promises to talk tomorrow. Harry layed in bed staring at his ceiling willing sleep to come but feeling so wired still from the last few hours he spent with Y/N. Her voice was just as warm as he expected and it turned him on more than he imagined it could.  
He turned over to try to get comfortable, hearing a ping come from his nightstand. He leaned up on his elbow, pressing the home button to light up the screen.
Thank you xxx  
A smile curled the left side of his mouth up as warmth spread across his cheeks.  
Thank you love xx  
***
TGIF.     
Y/N sent Harry the text on her train ride home from the office.  She couldn’t believe how long of a week she had.  She loves her job but she often wonders if it will ever not be like this. If she will ever end her week with a little extra energy to actually do something on a Friday night instead of going home to take a really long bath and cuddle her dog.  
She and Harry have been consistently talking for two months. More often than not she wakes up to a reply from him from their conversation the night before. The night before, when he would talk slowly in his deep voice, telling her all the ways he wanted to fuck her. When he’s moaning from the hand he has wrapped around his cock, begging her to come.  
She has a tendency to fall asleep not long after he helps her orgasm, making their conversation spill into the next day.  They never really end though.  Sure, there are lulls when either are busy.  Hours, sometimes a full day could pass and the conversation would just pick up where they left off.
Y/N liked that about them. Their conversations were easy and could range on the topic throughout any given day.  Like the day they started the conversation off with how much Harry came the night before and ended late that night with a deep discussion of whether they believed there was life on other planets.
Lol long day?
Longest. Do you have plans tonight?   
Yeah I do
Y/N frowned down at her phone.  Damn, she thought.  
Oh okay, have fun. We can talk tomorrow. 
Plans with my bed and you ;)  
Haha why are you like this  
Cause it’s fun  
For who?
Never mind don’t answer that
I’ll be home in 10 :)
Y/N smiled down to her phone before locking it. She couldn’t deny that he made her smile. He was funny, and charming. They got on really well. And they just clicked when it came to the phone sex. He always seemed to know what she needed in the moment to get off.
They’ve spent every Friday night just like this for weeks now. Y/N would get home late from work, eat something quickly, take the fastest shower of her life and get into bed to call Harry. He was always there, ready and waiting for her. There have been nights when they would talk for hours. Her credit card knows that better than anyone.  
It always started out with sex but ended with them talking about something random.  They would catch their breath together, giggle as they came down and then the conversation would shift until one of them found themselves dozing off.  
I’m home. If you’re ready, I was thinking I could take you in the bath with me.  
Love that idea. I’m ready when you are love.
One sec
Y/N started her bath, threw in the epsom salt and bubble bath she always used and took her work clothes off, throwing piece after piece of clothing into her hamper. She had the lights dimmed and lit a candle that she kept on her counter. She pulled her hair up into a bun on the top of her head before stepping into the tub, hissing as she eased into the hot water.   
Once she was settled and the tub was filled she quickly turned the water off, dried her hands on her towel and grabbed her phone to click Harry’s contact.
Setting it down on the ledge and sinking further into the water as it rang, waiting for his voice to grace her ears.
“Hi, love,” he greeted softly.
“Hey! How are you?”
“M’good. You in the bath already?”
“Yes thank god. I’ve missed my baths,” she chuckled softly.
“Missed them?” Harry laughed.
“I use to take a bath every Friday after work but ever since we started talking I’ve taken showers.”
“Is that because you can’t wait to get on the phone with me?”
She could hear the smile in his voice and let her own lips curl slightly.
“Yeah, well, I found that an orgasm relaxes me more than a bath.”  
“Could have been taking baths this whole time, love. I have no problem with making you come while you’re in there.”  
“Yeah?” She asks breathily, her skin tingling with his promise.
“Yeah, can’t help but think about being sat behind you.”
“Gonna rub my shoulders?” She teases.
“Was thinking more that I could rub your clit,” Harry’s voice drops lower as he speaks. “Would you like that?”
“Yes,” Y/N says on an exhale with her knees pressed together.
“Can you do it for me?”
Harry’s laying in his bed with his phone held up to his ear. His other hand is rubbing his cock over is boxers as he listens to her moan softly, imagining her spreading her legs in the tub to tease her clit.
“Do you know how hard you make me?” He asks, his voice strained as he pulls his cock from his boxers and strokes from his tip to the base.
“No,” Y/N breathes.  
“You don’t?” He moans, both from the way her voice sounds soft and breathy and from his thumb rubbing over his tip.
“Nuh-uh,” she breathes again, her head tilting back to rest on the tub as she rubs slow circles on her clit.  
Harry’s cock pulses at her tone. He loves when she’s unassuming like this, especially since he knows that she knows exactly how hard she makes him. They’ve been doing this long enough to know what gets the other person off and although Y/N likes to play innocent, he knows better. She likes his reactions. She likes hearing him moan and tell her how turned on he is.  
“Fuck,” he groans out slowly as he pumps his cock, his hips pushing up to meet his hand the tiniest bit. “I’m throbbin’ for you. Got me so hard, feels like it has its own pulse.”  
“Shit,” she moaned, her imagination conjuring the image of him stroking his cock. Imagining how his skin moves over his hard length. “Are you in bed?”  
He smiled at her inquiry. She did this every night; asked where he was in his house and what he was wearing. She wanted details ever since their first phone call when he told her it would get her in the moment. If they couldn’t see each other then they at least needed to be able to let their minds come up with an image of what the other person might look like while they touched themselves.  
“Yeah love,” he sighed as he stretched his toes towards the end of the bed. “Have my cock pulled out of my boxers. Couldn’t wait,” he blushed at the admission. Even though she couldn’t see him, he still felt embarrassed. He was needy for her. Just her text that she was almost home made him antsy.  
“Will you take them off?” She asked quietly, her cheeks burning from the tingles shooting up her spine and the way she immediately heard the ruffling coming through the phone from him moving around to remove his boxers.  
“Better?” he asked, the smile evident in his tone.  
“Would be better if you were here,” she mumbled with a light laugh, her cheeks warm with desire.    
“As much as I like when you touch yourself, I would much rather be the one touching you,” Harry spoke softly.  
“Yeah,” she encouraged softly, her fingers putting more pressure on her clit. Her legs widened at his words as if she was making room for him.  
“Wanna fuck you with my fingers. Push two in to press against that spot that’ll have your legs shaking f’me.”  
“Shit-”  
“Sat behind you so I can kiss your neck. So you can feel how hard I am against you. Want you to feel how much watching you come from my fingers turns me on.” Harry’s voice is low as he tells her what he knows she wants to hear. His cock is leaking from the thought of feeling her clench around his fingers as she moans his name softly through the phone.
“Oh my god, I want you,” she moans, the words coming out all in one breath. Her core is clenching, begging to have his fingers fill her.    
Harry’s heart flutters at the same time his stomach clenches from her words. She’s said things like that before. That she needed him, wanted him, begged for him even, and every single time his reaction is the same. His face and neck get even warmer and his arousal pools in his belly, swirling with need to actually have her.  
“Give yourself two. Slide two fingers in, just like I fuckin’ would,” Harry instructs her, his voice gravelly as he pumps his cock faster, his wrist twisting around his tip repeatedly.  
“Fuck Harry,” she moans quietly as she pushes her fingers into herself, immediately pumping them slowly, curling them on every deep push.    
“That’s it, love. Now use your other hand to rub your clit until you come for me.” 
Y/N’s moan was strangled, her pleasure falling from her lips as she swirled two fingers over her clit in time with her other hand. Her core was clenching with every pump and every moan Harry let travel through the phone made her stomach twist.
Harry chanted a quiet “yes, yes,” as he stroked his cock faster. He couldn’t keep his own moans at bay even if he tried. Between the throbbing of his cock as he fucked himself and the sounds Y/N made when she was close made it impossible for him to be quiet. “Gonna make me come,” he spoke slowly into the phone.
“Yeah, please,” she moaned at his words as her fingers sped up, her orgasm ready to burst.
“Shit,” he extended the word with a groan as he pumped his cock until he held himself still at his base and his orgasm coated his fingers and stomach. He was quiet for a few seconds, Y/N holding her breath until she heard him gasp once he was finished. She pictured what she envisioned him to look like with his head thrown back and his neck extended as he came all over himself, moaning at the image her mind created for her.
Her neck extended back as the first sparks of her orgasm hit her, slowing her fingers to let the tingles wash over her. “Harry,” she whispered as her core clenched and pulsed around the fingers she held deep inside herself.
“Fuck baby,” his voice was pure gravel, a small moan escaping his throat as he listened to her come. Her moans were wanton and full and instantly made him think of how well she would squeeze his cock if it was inside her.
They were quiet for a moment as they both caught their breath. Y/N’s knees extended back into the water as the rest of her body went lax. “How’s it always so good?” she asks, her voice breathy and slow.
“We’re just fuckin’ good together,” he laughed, shuffling to grab the tee shirt that happened to be beside his bed to clean himself up.
“We really are,” she giggled. “It’s kind of crazy though.”
“Is it?”
“Well yeah, I get off better with you and you’re not even here.” Her voice had that soft post orgasm tone that he loved. The one that made her words sort of mumble together and her volume lower a few decibels. Her gentle tone making the hair on the back of his neck stand up.
“I’ve never gotten off this good,” he admits quietly.
“Really?”
“Yeah. I mean, I’ve met people I really click with but we’re… different. Don’t you think?” His hair stood up for a different reasons now, his heartbeat prominently making itself heard in his ears.
“I’m definitely comfortable with you,” she chuckled in reply.
Harry was quiet for a few seconds as his mind fought over what he wanted to say next. “Makes you wonder what’d we really be like together..” he trailed off, feeling his cheeks warming from his suggestion.
“Right,” she giggled softly.
They were quiet again. Harry was willing her to say something else, anything. To give him any indication that maybe she was curious about what he was really like too.
“Oh,” she finally spoke up, making his pulse pick up again. “You called me baby.”
His pulse remained quick even with his disappointment. She was hard to read, her tone didn’t give any indication of how she felt about him calling her that, making him nervous and unsure how to reply.
“Do you like being called that?” He took a shot in the dark. Hoping she did.
“I love it,” she spoke softly.
“S’okay if I call you it sometimes?”  He asked, trying to control his breathing. That simple question making butterflies erupt in his stomach, hoping she’d allow that bit of intimacy.  
“Of course.”
He could hear her smile, causing more butterflies as heat crawled up his neck. “Good,” he murmured, stretching his body across his bed, willing his pulse to relax.
She hummed as she moved, the sound of the water swishing coming through his speaker. “God, I have to get out of here,” she muttered with what he imagined was a pout on her face. “Don’t wanna,” she sounded even more pouty and it made his lips curl into a smile.
“Just add more hot water,” he suggested with a laugh only to hear her whine in response.
“No then I’ll fall asleep and get a stiff neck,” she chuckled. “Hold on.”
He could hear the water fall off her body as she stood. He pretended he knew what she looked like as she stood in her tub, her skin glistening from the water sticking to it. He pictured her wrapping herself in a fluffy towel and carefully stepping out of tub to hopefully get into her bed, warm and naked.
“Do you have guitar lessons tomorrow?” She asked as she dried herself off.
“Yeah first one’s at 7:30.”
“I don’t know how you do it. I would be exhausted if I stayed up this late when I have work in the morning,” she laughed, flicking her bathroom light off before she padded across the room to crawl into her bed.
“I’m used to it,” he laughed softly.
“Well I’m gonna let you go since you won’t do it,” she teased. “Plus I know as soon as my head hits this pillow I’ll pass out.”
“Sure, love. Sleep tight.”
“Night, Harry.”  
She watched the call end, falling back to her pillow as she sprawled her arms and legs out, dropping her phone onto the bed. Normally the mixture of Harry’s voice and an intense orgasm lulled her right to sleep. But tonight? Tonight she stared at her ceiling for a while with thoughts of what her and Harry could be like if she allowed them to get together.    
*** 
masterlist || talk to me
(Part Three)
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