#when lucifer tells dean you will always end up here in The End he was actually talking to me always thinking abt season 8

[rupertgayes]

not to get sick and twisted about goodbye stranger but i am once again having sick and twisted thoughts about goodbye stranger.

#when lucifer tells dean you will always end up here in The End he was actually talking to me always thinking abt season 8 #jmap #destiel #fic coming soon maybe #spn

[samwhump]

a (very inexhaustive, wincest-heavy) sam whump reclist

@transfemmesam asked me for Sam whump recs a few days ago, and I've had other requests in the same vein before (I can't imagine why.../s) so I thought I would throw this together, since these authors deserve all of the love and support for their contributions to our li'l fandom corner.

like I mentioned in the title, this is not at all a comprehensive list; I have at least ~200 more fics in my to-read queue that could thematically fit here, but alas, I have stupid shit like a job and a body and a dog to take care of, so. I'm always happy to get recs along these lines, so if you notice anything important missing, hit me UP. (and don't take any omissions as any specific commentary by me -- it's likely I just haven't had the chance to read it yet, haha.)

disclaimers:

some (most, honestly) of these contain potentially triggering and dark content, including but not limited to rape/noncon, torture, and suicidal attempts & ideation. I have tried to note content warnings where applicable, and most of the works are hosted on ao3, so the tags should have most of the information you need to make an informed decision. that being said, tread with caution. all of the summaries provided are from the original author, with warnings added after by me.

the list is in alphabetical order and separated into wincest and gen categories. a lot of the gen is also focused on the sam & dean relationship, because...I am what I am. and what I am a sucker for these two dipshits. there is also a brief section at the end with a few fics that don't fit into either category.

gen

All That Goes Unspoken by amnesiawife:

A case forces Sam to confront something long kept buried. (Set nebulously in season 12.)

CW: discussions of past rape/noncon, victim blaming

Beneath the Trees 'verse by Lise (5 works total, starting with Beneath the Trees, Where Nobody Sees):

Sam doesn't go to Stanford. Everything goes downhill from there.

CW: suicidal ideation

a boy is a cage by ad_castra:

After expelling Gadreel from Sam's body, Dean thinks they're in the clear. If only they were that lucky. // S9 fic wherein Gadreel's grace causes some adverse side-effects in Sam's mind.

CW: past referenced rape/noncon, body horror

body of proof by Askance (doomcountry):

There are things Sam hasn't told his brother. They're all in the envelope laid on Dean's pillow.

CW: heavy discussion of past rape/noncon

break these bones 'til they're better by redskyatmorning:

After Sam’s torture at the hands of the British Men of Letters, the latest in a long string of violations, he is rescued by Dean and Mary – and forced to ponder his broken relationship with his own body. Months later, when Sam is resurrected and tormented by Lucifer yet again, Dean confronts Mary and Sam gets his revenge against the devil.

catching my death (staring out an open window) by ad_castra:

Sam gazes at the window, catches the faint pink hue tinting the sky. It’s so realistic - he could breathe in the fresh air if he were really here. ----- They got Sam out. Sometimes, just knowing that isn't enough.

CW: implied past rape/noncon

Death of Convenience by WilsonTheMoose:

It should have been easy. Wendigos are no joke but daylight slows them. The weather's been unpredictable though and perfect, idyllic hunts don't exactly stay that way where they're concerned. Or Sam has one card to play and never stops to think that Dean would care if he killed himself.

CW: suicidal ideation, references to suicide

Echoes of Hell by The_Nightbreaker:

It wasn't real. He wasn't in Hell anymore. That's what he tried to tell himself over and over. But two centuries of torture don't disappear in a day. Sam struggles with visions of Hell, fighting to maintain his grip on reality. Dean hates that he can't protect his brother from what isn't real—but curse him if he doesn't try. When the boys stumble on a case with ties to the Devil himself, will they be able to pull themselves together in time to stop the sacrifices? Or will the echoes of Hell finally overtake them? Aka, season 7, but the plot is Hell trauma, not leviathans.

CW: suicidal ideation

Evening Shadows by withthekeyisking:

Sam is hallucinating the monster who tortured him for nearly two centuries, Dean feels like he's failing his brother, and a diner waitress bears witness.

CW: past rape/noncon

Everything Dies Given Time by Lise:

AU from 5.03. Sam discovers something wrong with himself, and learns to live with it. Only a lot less functional.

CW: suicide/temporary character death

The Freedom to Be Loud by jribbing:

It hadn’t occurred to Dean that maybe Sam remembered so much about that little nowhere town because something memorable had happened there.

CW: referenced past rape/noncon

golgotha by redskyatmorning:

There’s a vacancy on the throne of hell, and Sam is desperate enough to save Dean from Michael’s possession to give into the abyssal depths of his own darkness.

Head Space by ameliacareful:

A witch curses Sam leaving him blind, deaf, and bedridden. Left with only the inside of his own head and the occasional touch, Sam begins to unravel.

CW: suicidal ideation

Hiraeth by inkandpaperqwerty:

(n.) a homesickness for a home to which you cannot return, a home which maybe never was; the nostalgia, the yearning, the grief for the lost places of your past "Dean... I made a really big mistake." For a second, Dean actually thought things were going okay. He was out of Hell, Sam agreed to stop drinking demon blood, they had just wrapped up a successful hunt... for once, everything was okay. And then it wasn't. "I overdosed." Not at all.

CW: suicide attempts, suicidal ideation

if i could leave (i would've already left) by serendipity0930:

“I have a mission from God for you,” the Angel whispers to the man. “It is time for you to do what you were born to.” The man’s face twists into a smile, delighted over being chosen by Him, a purpose from God digging into his heart, carving out a place to fester. “Hunt.” ... 05x03 AU where Zachariah is even more determined to keep the brothers apart and hunters are all too willing to take Lucifer's True Vessel off the board for good

CW: referenced suicide

It's A River (But Not In Egypt) by Lise:

He's still a liar. Maybe always has been.

CW: toxic Sam/Lucifer dynamics

Kindred Instruments by PinBitch:

They’re in a tug of war and Sam is the rope. He doesn’t need to be alive for that. OR Sam dies in detox, being flung against the walls of a metal box will do that to you. Dean and Ruby pick up the pieces.

CW: temporary main character death, permanent supporting character death

lazarus trick by katsidhe:

Sam's alive, so everything is gonna be okay. 13.22 coda.

Let All Mortal Flesh Keep Silence by Lise:

Sam's back. He's in one piece. That's the problem.

CW: self-harm

love is like ghosts by redskyatmorning:

I’m poison, Dean had said instead of I’m sorry. Well, Sam wants to say, what does that make me? What the hell does that make me? (A look into Sam's mind in the aftermath of the Gadreel possession.)

The Other Brother by RadioFriday:

Sam and Adam are pulled from the cage at the same time. Sam is not right, and Adam, stuck as his caretaker, is not pleased.

Oxygen by inkandpaperqwerty:

“Cas! Cas, please! Please, answer me! Cas!” Castiel ignores Dean for several minutes, but then Dean gives him an opening that might help him complete his mission. So, he goes to investigate, and what he finds is a very bloody, nearly dead Sam. Dean tells him where the injuries came from, and Castiel quickly becomes confused. It doesn't make sense, but Dean tries to explain it to him, and slowly... Castiel begins to understand.

CW: suicide attempt

Post Hoc, Ergo Propter Hoc by AmberSock:

Sam waits, kneeling, for his execution. What if Dean hadn't missed?

CW: temporary character death

Safety In Distance by GalaxyThreads and SpiritClusters:

The Mark of Cain is a brand of violence. Sam was an idiot to think that he'd be exempt from it, just because he and Dean are siblings.

sometimes a kind of singing by adi_rotynd:

Sam gets cursed. They're dealing with it. Jack can see souls. That one they're not dealing with quite as well.

CW: past referenced rape/noncon

Soul Windows by GalaxyThreads and Spirit Clusters:

A few months after his birth, Jack learns how to see souls. Then he comes to a realization about the Winchester brothers, Sam in particular, and it's not a pleasant one. (gen)

Starry Night by keepcalmsmile:

Sam attempts suicide-by-monster. Dean tries to help. It sort of works...until it doesn't.

CW: suicide attempts, suicidal ideation

such fragile, broken things by The_Bookkeeper:

Sam wishes that Dean would just get it over with already.

The Tale of Sir Galahad by keepcalmsmile:

Sam once said he could never be clean like Sir Galahad. Dean assumed he was just talking about the demon blood. Turns out, Sam was talking about something else too. WARNING: Extended discussions of the aftermath of rape and childhood sexual abuse (but NO description of the actual events). Happy(ish) ending, but potentially very triggering.

CW: past rape/noncon, mentioned CSA

They Hammered in His Teeth by jribbing:

Sam has a secret.

CW: suicidal ideation

today's troubles (are history tomorrow) by a_good_soldier:

"It's not really something I know how to share," Sam had said. In which Dean figures he ought to help Sam out a bit.

Touch and Go by themegalosaurus:

Tag to 9.19 (Alex Annie Alexis Ann) in which Dean realises why, exactly, Sam is so angry about what happened with Gadreel.

trust fall by ad_castra:

“I’m nothing like you,” Sam hisses. Nevermind relating to the anguish of going it alone. Nevermind that he knows what it is to be strapped down and forcibly cleansed against his will. Sam wonders if these trials are purifying Crowley as well. 

Words Like Glass by broken_cinders:

Dean never figured the cage wouldn't leave a mark. He was prepared for memories, flashbacks, and nightmares. He wasn't expecting the words Sam brought back with him or the way they made him seem just a breath beyond Dean's reach.

Wound and Unwound by fascra:

Sam stops eating spring of his freshman year.

CW: eating disorder

wincest (dean/sam)

Brittle by thecapn:

Sam Winchester has an eating disorder.

CW: eating disorder

Don't You Cry No More by sixtysevenlmpala (schittyfic):

The first time Sam gets badly hurt on a hunt, he doesn’t cry. Dean does.

Fall On Your Knees by dollylux:

Sam doesn't quite make it home on the last day of school before winter break.

The Fall Will Probably Kill You by killabeez:

Set between 7.04 and the aftermath of 7.07. Dean is not as okay as he'd like you to think. Neither is Sam.

CW: self-harm

Feels so good to feel again by Trojie:

The pain keeps Lucifer at bay, at least to start with.

Follow In Your Form by withthekeyisking:

Sam is hallucinating Lucifer in the wake of Cas bringing his Hell Wall crashing down. To make matters worse, it seems like this has his dormant powers flaring back to life.

Last Temptation by merle_p:

Sam is running a fever again, the kind of fever no Ibuprofen or cold compress will bring down, the kind of fever that is eating him up alive, eviscerating him from the inside. He is too hot and too cold and too pale, delirious and shaking, resonating with whatever divine energy the trials are subjecting him to, and Dean is not sure how much longer he can stand to see him be in this state. Because Sam is quite possibly dying, and there is nothing Dean can do to stop it. Because Sam is dying, and he just. Won’t. Shut. Up.

CW: mentioned past rape/noncon

leeches by Anonymous:

Sam discovers a spell to make everybody forget him. He’s convinced it’s for the best. Pre-Stanford.

CW: attempted kidnapping/torture

Make Thick My Blood by themegalosaurus:

“You’re going to kill me, Dean,” Sam says, eventually. And all Dean can say is, “I think I am.” A season 10 AU, set after 10x14 ('The Executioner's Song'). Cas finds a solution that might cure the Mark of Cain; but if they're going to go through with it, Sam has a terrible price to pay.

CW: mentioned past rape/noncon

Prophecy of an Abomination by ashitanoyuki:

Sam is kidnapped by fanatically religious hunters and crucified. Coming back from this won't be easy. Canon-divergent from midway through season 2.

Recall by De_Nugis:

Sam's having a hard time telling what's real and what isn't, especially when it comes to some voicemails from Dean.

The Room Upstairs by brokenlittleboy:

Sam comes back from hell, but he’s inside-out and all wrong, and Dean can’t fix him.

CW: mentioned past rape/noncon

Ruin You (and its companion fic Worth) by Mumble_Bee:

Cole fucks Sam with Demon!Dean watching from a devil's trap, snarling that anyone would dare touch what was his. “I told you I don’t care what you do to his face or his blood or his fucking nose,” Dean growled, “but you put your dick anywhere near him and I will end you.” “Better hurry up then, Dean, because I don’t think I can wait much longer.”

CW: explicit rape/noncon

Snowed In by HelloStarlingFics:

When working a case, Sam and Dean get stuck out in a shack in the woods when the snow comes in hard and fast. Trouble is, Sam’s hated the cold ever since the Cage. Time for Dean to step up and look after him.

Wake by minchout:

Gadreel has had Sam for four years, and Dean, lost in guilt and obsessed with finding a way to get his brother back, has isolated himself in a cabin in the Missouri Ozarks with nothing but the woods, a stray dog, some chickens, and all the books the Men of Letters had to offer to keep him company. Then Sam shows up one day without his passenger, and Dean learns quickly that it doesn't matter that Sam is with him again - there is still a lot of work to be done before they can find their way back to each other.

Wanting to Forget by morganaDW (morgana07):

1-shot. S1 fic. After getting Sam freed from the Benders Dean thinks all he has to cope with is some bruises and cuts. He learns quickly just how wrong he is when Sam wakes up with a nightmare, reliving his brief but bad captivity in every detail. Sam just wants to forget & Dean has to try to get him to let him help. Will one night of cruelty and pain ruin what’s been formed between them?

CW: referenced past rape/noncon

when I wake up I'm afraid, somebody else might take my place by quake_quiver:

Sam doesn’t remember the last time he cried for Dean like he did that night. And now it’s been…two weeks. Maybe more. Sam is tired, and in pain, and starting to doubt that Dean’s going to show up. He’s weak and shaking from a combination of constant pain and hunger. Sam longs for Dean. Dean would make it better. Dean would fix it.

CW: rape/noncon, body horror

Wire Inside Me by merle_p:

There are a lot of things Sam hates about his current condition, to the point where he sometimes feels for the gun under his pillow at night, blindly toys with the safety, imagines pressing the muzzle into the underside of his chin and pulling the trigger just to make it stop. But there’s nothing he hates as much as the shadows he sees in Dean’s eyes whenever his brother is looking at him these days. It’s not an expression he remembers ever seeing before, but Sam thinks it’s probably something like revulsion. Horror. Disgust. What else could it be.

CW: referenced past rape/noncon, body horror, forced pregnancy

Worth (and its companion fic Ruin You) by Mumble_Bee:

Episode 10x01 "Black" where Dean is a human, and very, very, pissed off to hear someone has hands on his brother. “It’s nothing personal,” Cole whispered into Sam's ear, too quietly for Dean to hear, “but I need to kill your brother, and I need him off his game when he gets here. I don’t wanna hurt you, kid, but I’m going to, anyway. I’m going to hurt you a lot."

CW: explicit rape/noncon

you'll never see us again by according2thelore:

Then finally, his eyes trail over to Dean. His pupils are pin-point thin, and his hair is straggling in his face so Dean can’t see most of what expression lies there. Sam usually wakes up from nightmares in one of three attitudes: confusion, fear, or calm. A scary, sense-prickling calm that Dean hates more than anything else. Resignation, almost. Or: Sam suffers from nightmares and touch starvation post-Cage. They do their best to deal.

other Sam/Lucifer noncon

Cage Fight (No Way To Do This Right) by Dyed_Red:

Sam’s visit to the cage is already going awry, but Dean’s one-man rescue ends up skidding it sideways into territory neither him or Sam are ready for. (Gratuitous episode scene re-write. If Cas hadn’t come till after, if he hadn’t been there yet when Dean ran down to the 'parole' cage after hearing Sam scream - how bad could it have got for the brothers before he made it?)

CW: graphic rape/noncon

Into Being by withthekeyisking:

When Sam wakes up in the cave on Apocalypse World after having been killed by vamps, it's not just to find Lucifer there with him. It's to find him in him.

CW: graphic rape/noncon, necrophilia, forced pregnancy

Reggie/Tim/Sam noncon

a pointless resistance for you by withthekeyisking:

Sam doesn't know how long he's been with Tim and Reggie by the time Dean shows up and tries to take him out of there. Long enough that's he's already lost one baby and is pregnant with the next. Long enough that this life is starting to feel like all he knows.

CW: graphic rape/noncon, forced pregnancy & miscarriage, victim blaming

screaming birds sound an awful lot like singing by withthekeyisking:

Sam has done his best to move past what Tim and Reggie did to him, pretending it never happened at all. But running into them again makes that very difficult—especially when Dean gets involved.

CW: referenced past rape/noncon

Waste 'Em All by withthekeyisking:

When Tim and Reggie try to force the demon blood down Sam's throat, he spits it back out. He has no interest in being turned into their own personal attack dog. They don't...take it well.

CW: explicit rape/noncon

#sam winchester #sam whump #supernatural #supernatural fic rec #wincest

[castieldelamancha]

Castiel tunes out the conversation the brothers are having on the front seat, going around in circles over and over the plan they have come up with. He looks around the backseat, looking for something to keep himself occupied with for the duration of the trip. Maybe one of Dean's books, or a tape waiting to be rewind and forgotten here. Dean taught how to do it not so long ago and he finds the task calming in its simplicity.

Before he can reach for the comic book he has spotted at the opposite end of the seat something white on the car' s floor catches his attention. It looks like a folded piece of paper, only a corner of it peeking from underneath Dean's seat. He picks it up and unfolds it, sure it's probably just a flyer Dean forgot to throw away, he hates finding those on the impala's windshield, or maybe is a spell he was carrying somewhere and got lost in here. He is sure Dean mentioned something about a piece of paper being misplaced, but he refused to tell Castiel what he actually was looking for.

He unfolds it delicately, the brothers still arguing back and forth,

movies to show cas

It says, written in Dean's familiar handwriting. Castiel keeps reading, there is a list of movies, some titles he is familiar with, others not so much, he is almost sad at the little amount of movies that have been crossed out, indicating they have watched them already. He would do all in his power to stay, to be around more at least, if things weren't as messy as they always are when it comes to their lives.

Even with the wave of sadness that floods him he smiles, it seems those movie nights Dean came up with are as important and dear to him as they are to Castiel himself.

"What are you smiling about back there, huh?" Dean gives him a suspicious look through the rearview mirror.

"Eyes on the road, Dean." Sam scolds, as Castiel replies "I just saw one of those pictures of cats on the internet."

As poorly versed as he still is on the way humans behave around others even him can tell Dean wouldn't appreciate this particular list coming up in front of his brother.

He waits instead, until Sam asks for them to make a stop so he can go to the bathroom, and he gives it back, folded as neatly as he found it, passing it over the back of the front seat for Dean to take it with a "I think I found that piece of paper you were looking for, Dean."

Dean mutters a quick "thanks", taking the paper from him and putting it away without looking back at Castiel, the back of his neck turning a light shade of red.

.

Castiel reaches inside his inner pocket, feeling a familiar weight there. Despite his coat being different to the one he was wearing when Lucifer killed him its contents seem to be the same. His fingers make contact with the hard surface of the tape he always carried in his pocket since Dean gave it to him. But there is something else there, something he doesn't remember having with him when he died, he fishes out the piece of paper. It's neatly folded, he unfolds it slowly, wondering who put it there and why

movies to show cas

it says, written in Dean's familiar handwriting, he smiles, a small, watery-eyed thing, seems like they got a second chance to keep crossing out more items on their list, despite the cowardice of a treacherous stab in the back and the hunger of a pyre of fire.

#destiel #vanessa writes ✨ #ficlet #the thing is I don't give a fuck about canon #i have never and i am not going to start now #long post

[queen-of-deans-booty]

Destined For Greatness

Pairing: Destiel x Daughter!Reader

Word Count: ~1.5k

Warnings: minor angst, michael posessing dean, destiel fluff at the end

Request by anon: Hey can i request a imagine about being a Tribrid (Half angel, half demon, half witch) who Team Free Will  takes under their wing and being like a daughter to Dean and Castiel (they can be married) and defend them when Michael, Lucifer, or Raphael attacks them? 

Summary: Michael took your dad away from you and it's up to you and Jack to ger him back in one piece.

Square Filled: michael!dean (2023) for @heavenandhellbingo

Author’s Note: i appreciate any and all comments! <3

x

You, your dad, Sam, and Jack are gathered around the war room trying to come up with a plan of attack on Michael. You’re nervous to say the least because you’ve never faced someone as powerful as Michael, but he has someone you love dearly. He trapped Dean inside his own mind while taking over his body and doing God only knows what with it. Taking down humanity is one thing but going after someone you love is a whole different ballpark.

“I still think we need a plan B,” Castiel sighs.

“Plan A is going to work. I’ve been practicing all month,” you state.

“Dean can get hurt.”

“Dad, I promise no harm is going to come to Dad. Do you really think I’d put him in danger?”

Castiel stares into your bright teal eyes, a mixture of Dean’s forest green and Castiel’s electric blue. He reaches out and tucks a strand of your hair behind your ear.

“No.”

“Then you have nothing to worry about.”

“Okay, I trust you.” Castiel turns to the other two men and sighs. “What’s the plan?”

“We know where he’s hiding, right? Y/N will use her magic to make sure he’s alone. She will pretend to be the scared daughter who just wants her dad back.” Sam turns to you with determination. He’s hellbent on getting his brother back one way or another, and that’s through you. “As soon as his guard is down, you’ll pull Michael from Dean. Once he’s out, Cas and I will get Dean to safety, and that’s when Jack comes in. His power combined with yours should be enough to take him down. He’ll only be a white light since he won’t have enough time to find another vessel.”

“Are you sure she’s gonna be safe?” Castiel asks.

“Dad, I can do this. I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t think I could handle it.”

It’s true. You’re the first of your species, a demon/angel/witch tribrid. You’re always discovering new abilities, always showing a new side to yourself, and you’re doing it all alone. Since you’re the first and only of your species, you have no one to turn to if you have any questions. This journey of self-discovery has been done through trial and error, and there have been a lot of errors. 

Not this time. This time, you will not fail. Your dad’s life depends on it.

You gather what you need and head out with the three men to the warehouse you know Michael is in. He’s been capturing monsters to make them hybrids of his own creation, but none of them have survived his experiements. He wants to create an army that will rule over humanity, but it’s time you put an end to it.

You walk into the warehouse alone and into the back room where Michael is. His back is turned to you when you enter but you know he knows you’re here because he stiffens up. He wipes the blood from a large blade and you see someone lying dead on the ground by his feet. You change your demeanor to that of a scared child rather than someone who is all powerful.

“I’m assuming you didn’t come alone,” he says and turns to face you.

“They don’t know I’m here. They wouldn’t have let me come otherwise.” Michael nods once in agreement. “I just want to speak to my dad, please.”

“Sorry, kid, no can do.”

“You have to understand where I’m coming from. He’s my dad. You took him away from me without letting me say goodbye,” you cry.

“I’m only going to tell you this once because I’m feeling a little generous. Your daddy is gone. He’s not coming back. Now, I’ve kept him alive for this long but I can easly kill him and keep the body. If you don’t want that to happen, I suggest you leave.”

This scared act isn’t going to work. You have to do something else or you’re going to put your dad in more harm than not.

“Fine, I’ll leave. Just please tell him I love him.”

“Sure,” Michael rolls his eyes.

You turn to leave but Michael’s eyes don’t leave you. He’s not going to relax until he knows you’re gone. Instead of doing that, you gather every bit of strength inside of you to take down Michael. You turn to Michael with magic in your eyes and at your fingertips.

“I changed my mind. I’m not leaving here without my dad.”

You blast him back with your magic but it doesn’t really effect Michael in the way he thinks. Instead of dissipating, your magic gets sucked back into you like a vaccum. With it is Michael’s true form. He tries to fight it but the combined powers of demon, angel, and witch is enough to pull Michael completely from your dad. Dean falls to the ground, completely weak physically and mentally.

“No, stop!” Dean cries out but doesn’t have the strength to stop his daughter.

Sam and Castiel enter the back room from the side and rush over to Dean to get him to safety. Castiel can try and fight Michael, but you and Jack are more powerful than he can ever dream of being. This has to be done by the both of you. Michael’s true form spikes angrily as it tries to find another vessel to use, but you keep him suspended into the air with your powers. Jack walks in behind you and blasts Michael with his own power, rendering Michael useless.

Michael tries to fight back against both your powers but is having a hard time doing so. He becomes so frustrated and angry that he sends a sharp screech right at you. You release your hold on him and cover your ears as you scream out in pain. Even covering your ears isn’t enough to escape the shrill of his voice. 

With you out of the way, Michael blasts you and Jack back into the wall behind you, and he quickly makes his escape to find another vessel for the time being. He’s going to be back once he’s more prepared to fight you and Jack. Dean, Sam, and Cas come back into the room and run over to you and Jack with concern written across their faces. Sam checks Jack over while both your dads comfort you.

“Are you okay?” Castiel asks worriedly.

“Yeah, I just have a headache. Whatever he did messed with my mind,” you whimper in pain. “I’m okay, though. It worked. I got Dad back.”

“This was completely reckless. You shouldn’t have gone in there like that,” Dean scowls.

“Hey, we can pick this up when we get back home. Right now, we need to get the hell out of here,” Sam says.

“He’s right. We need to go,” Castiel says.

Dean scoops you into his arms and carries you back out to the car. The ride home was spent relaxing and gaining your strength back. Michael is very powerful and if you have any shot at beating him, you’re going to need to hone your powers and become stronger mentally. Still, by the time you got home, you’re almost asleep from how tired it made you. Dean takes you to your room to tuck you in despite you being almost eighteen.

“Stay with me?” you mumble when he goes to leave.

“Sure,” he chuckles. The hard talk can come tomorrow once you’ve fully rested. The only thing that matters now is that you’re safe and back in his arms. He won’t ever let anything happen to you, not after your mom died on his watch. Dean watches your eyes flit back and forth under the lid and he wonders what you could be dreaming about. Someone knocks on the door once and Dean looks up to see his husband at the doorway. “There’s room for one more.”

Castiel walks in and gets into bed, careful not to wake you.

“I was really scared,” Castiel confesses.

“I wasn’t,” Dean whispers back. “I knew I was gonna be okay because I have you and Y/N to watch over me.”

Castiel knows how hard it is for Dean to talk about his feelings, so this is a big step. It’s only because Sam isn’t in the room, and you’re asleep so you won’t hear it either. Castiel meets Dean halfway and kisses him slowly but lovingly. It’s moments like this that makes what they do worth it. Dean pulls away from his husband and looks down at his daughter once more.

“She’s going to be very powerful one day.”

“She got it from her mother.” Your mom had been possessed by a demon and an angel while being a powerful witch which is why you’re a tribrid. “She’s destined for greatness, and we’re both going to be here to witness it.”

Castiel and Dean decide to stay in bed with you to comfort you until the morning.

x

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#dean winchester #castiel #destiel #destiel x reader #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural #spn #spn fanfiction #spn fic #supernatural fic #castiel fanfiction #destiel fanfiction #dean winchester x reader #castiel x reader #supernatural fiction #supernatural fanfic #supernatural fan fic #supernatural angst #supernatural fluff #spn angst #spn fanfic

[hauntedpearl]

Endverse, Kind of MCD, 2.4kwords, Gen (ao3)

At the end of everything, there is still him. Cas. There is still Cas.

It's just that Dean doesn't know if it's a blessing or a curse.

His brother — Lucifer — is long gone. So is the other him. The one whose world hasn't gone to all shit yet. Who still has the chance to do the right thing.

Dean hopes he's doing it — whatever it is, because he sure as hell can't figure it out, even now.

Hopes that whatever happens, it doesn't end like this.

It hurts to move, hurts to breathe, hurts to think.

(He's doing all those things anyway. What else is new?)

"Reckless," Cas hisses from somewhere to his left. "I fucking told you it was reckless."

Dean doesn't respond, stares at up at the sky instead.

It's a good sky, all this considered. Here, at the end of everything.

Cloudless, and blue, like the world on the cusp of a warm summer. Like ice cream on a park bench. Sunglasses and sundresses.

Like his —

Like Cas' eyes. Or like they used to be.

It's a nice blue, is all.

Dean's glad to be looking at it.

"Sorry," he says, and his throat is scratched and torn, voice drenched in his own blood. He swallows, tries not to choke on it. Then, "Should've — Should've just stayed back, huh?"

Cas laughs, and it sounds like the rattling of the world. Like it hurts.

Dean's sure it does. Cas had looked like death warmed over when he'd crawled up to Dean on his hands and knees after everything, collapsing at his side.

He'd sighed, and the world went quiet, and it was selfish, but Dean was so fucking glad to have him, just then. Beside him. With him. Here, at the end of everything.

Dean doesn't know what exactly happened to Cas — if it was demons or the Croats or even Lucifer himself. Or a shitty fucking combination of the three. Cas won't tell, he knows, and Dean's not going to waste his last breaths asking.

It's the end of everything. And Dean's just glad for the company.

"Like that was ever a choice," Cas says, now, and he sounds bitter. He sounds helpless. A little smug, too. Sounds a lot like he has been for the past couple of years.

Dean blinks, drinking in the sky one last time. Rolls his neck so he's facing Cas instead.

"Fuck!" he swears, because it hurts like a motherfucker but atleast he can see Cas now. He can look at his face — human, and divine, all at once. It looks bashed in. Dean tries to not focus on that. Or the trickle of blood that carves its way down his chin. Tries to look at his eyes instead. The whites are shot with red — a burst blood vessel, if Dean would have to guess — but the irises are as blue as ever. Not the same as the sky, no, but close enough.

Dean loves them, always has. Loves looking at them.

"Of—Of course it was a choice," he says, now. "I — I didn't m—make you."

Cas smiles at him, close-mouthed, all bloody lips and regret. "Oh, you did, Dean. You always have."

And Dean knows what he means. Understands.

(He doesn't want to, though. But that's nothing new, either.)

"Th—Think you've got one last miracle in you, Cas?" he asks, and it's mostly in jest. But—

If—

Well.

Here's the thing about life— it can suck as all hell, but you'll still want to keep living it. All the time in the world, and it'll still never be enough. And Dean's here, at the end of everything, on purpose. By design. He chose this. Still — somewhere underneath all that hurt and hopelessness and the drive to just end it, he wants to live.

He's always wanted to.

He'll keep wanting to until there's nothing left of him to want with.

Cas pauses for a moment, almost like he's taking stock. Then, "No," he says. Groans as he turns onto his injured side, facing Dean. "'Fraid we ran out of those a while ago."

Just as well, Dean thinks.

Who knows what else he'd have had to endure if they did live to see another day. Atleast there's the sky, on this day.

Atleast there's Cas.

"Did he make it?" Cas asks. Coughs. Sprays blood everywhere. A drop of it lands on Dean's cheek.

Dean watches him as he wheezes, moans. Quiets a little. His eyes grow slightly unfocused.

It hurts to look at him.

Dean keeps looking anyway.

An angel who smote demons with a thought, reduced to the indignities of mortality by his calloused, human hands. Dean's done a lot of fucked up shit in his life but this — this takes the cake. When he's back on the racks in Hell this time, and for good, he'll deserve ever fucking second of it.

"Yeah," he says, shaking himself a little. "Yeah, he did. Just in time, too."

"Good," Cas breathes. Lets his eyes slip close. "That's — that's good."

There on his lashes is a tear.

Dean looks at it — a little universe on the edge of Cas' lashes. It's silver and blue, and shines in the light of the day. Dean wishes he was in it.

He thinks about the other version of him who went back in time. He wonders if he'd fix the fuckfest that this world has become. If it's even possible to fix it.

He wonders if it would matter.

Once, when things hadn't been so bad, Cas would talk to him about these things — Timelines and multiverses and the effect of the flapping of a single butterfly's wings. He bets Cas would know what would happen if the other Dean made a different choice this time around.

Bets he would know if it would matter.

Then, the tear rolls down Cas' cheek, across his nose. Falls to the ground in a bloody splash.

It's all — it's too much. It's overhwhelming.

"Cas—," he calls. Cas hums. Doesn't open his eyes. Dean wants him to open his eyes. Wants to look at the blue of them. He wants to see them smile, one last time. He wants —

"Lo—look at me, man."

"No," Cas says. There's the tinge of something horrid in his tone. Dean hates himself for being responsible for it. For being responsible for everything.

"Pl—Ple-ase, Cas," he begs.

Cas breathes. Dean watches his bruised chest swell, the slight rise in his shoulders. The way his too-long hair, matted and sweaty and bloody, flops in a lazy curve over his forehead.

Then, he opens his eyes.

Duller, now, but there, atleast.

Yes. There.

"Hey there, Cas," Dean says. Tries to smile. The skin across his bones stretches painfully.

Cas' face softens, then. Something that mirrors Dean's own smile carves itself into his bloody cheeks. There's something old, and quiet, and familiar about the shift. "Hello, Dean," he says, and Dean's heart lurches.

There you are, he thinks. There's my Cas.

After all these years. After everything.

It's still him, it's still them. At the end of it all.

Dean doesn't know if it's a blessing or a curse. He doesn't know.

He's not a big fan of deathbed confessions, but — well. Here they are. Cas is fading, he can tell, and his own thoughts are starting to scatter. They don't have long and this — this one thing.

Well. Dean's life has always been a cliche filled nightmare. Why would it be any different now?!

"C—Cas. I wanna—," he starts. Pauses when his breath sticks against the sharp edges of his broken ribs. Groans. Forces himself to keep going.

Just a moment, he prays to a God who's never listened. Give me one fucking moment.

"Dean?" Cas calls. Watches him struggle to breathe. "Dean!" He crawls closer, wiggling on his side. Presses a shaky palm to Dean's chest. Something cracks under his hands but somehow, somehow, the breath whooshes out of him.

He gasps. Then gasps again. And again.

"Th—Thought we were out of miracles," he manages between breaths.

"Wasn't one," Cas replies.

"Right. O—Okay."

But it feels like one, anyway. Every fucking thing about Cas feels like a fucking miracle.

The world is quiet, and Dean's dying under a bright blue sky, Cas' hand on his chest.

That feels like a miracle, too. And, well, isn't that something.

"Thank you," Dean says, after a moment. "For. Fo— for everything. I ne-ver do s-ay it—," and he doesn't. Dean doesn't. Even on frenzied nights that they spend trying to sate the hunger buried under their skins, or the morning-afters when the world is quiet and soft, and easy, if only for a moment. Dean never says it. He's a right fool for not saying it. "B—but. I couldn't — Not without you."

That didn't make sense, he thinks.

Cas just looks at him, his hooded eyes fending off exhaustion, fighting to stay open.

For him, Dean tries again. Says, "Every— every day. Always. I've needed you. And you've been here. Even when I — I didn't de-deserve it. Even — now. I need you, and you're here. You're always here. So— th-thank you. I just—," he trails off.

Cas is quiet.

Dean wonders if maybe he's gone. If perhaps the slight light in his eyes is not life but the echo of it. He cannot stand the thought. It keeps coming at him anyway.

Wake up, Dean pleads. Prays. Say something!

Then, Cas laughs.

And the world keeps spinning. If only for another moment.

"Fuck you, Dean Winchester," he says, and it bleeds the anger and resentment Dean's poured into him for years. "Fuck you. I do— don't. I don't accept your confession. I will not— grant you — this— this absolution."

Dean wants to think that he isn't seeking absolution. But he doesn't know anymore.

Maybe he is. Maybe he wants to be forgiven. Maybe he wants to know that it was alright to want Cas. To love him. To need him.

To be told that it was excuse enough for everything.

Dean laughs, too, then. Because what else is there to do.

His bones rattle in his chest under Cas' hand. He wonders if Cas can feel them. If he can feel the way his heart slows.

"Do what you wa-nt, ass-hole," he says. "For-Forgive me for try-ing, I guess."

"No," Cas says. Heaves himself closer, still. "I won't. It's all too late."

Yeah, okay.

That much is true. It's the truest thing of all.

It is.

It really is too damn late.

"I know," Dean says. "I'm so-sorry."

And he is. He's so fucking sorry. He wishes— Well.

What does it matter anyway.

Then— he screams.

Pain blooms in his chest, sharp and bright, and the edges of his vision turn white. He tries to move, but cannot. Tilts his head down, just so. Watches as Cas presses his palm flat against his chest and pushes once more.

Another scream tears out of his throat.

Cas uses his leverage to push himself closer, until he's flush against Dean's side. He drops unceremoniously, then, sprawling on his stomach, his body half on top of Dean's broken ribs. His chin settles on Dean's shoulder, and Dean feels his every laboured breath against his neck and collarbone.

"I hate you," Cas says. Wheezes, really. "But I—," and Dean thinks Don't. Don't say the word. " I guess— Guess I needed you, too."

Dean's relieved when Cas borrows his words. His arm's pinned between their bodies but he wiggles his fingers until he's got a fistful of Cas' shirt in his hands.

"'S'alright," he says to him. "'S'okay. I'll t-take it."

There's only Cas' messy hair in his line of sight, so he closes his eyes. Counts the dark spots on the back of his eyelids so he doesn't fall asleep.

Not yet, he begs his body. Not yet. Not yet.

"Hey, Cas?" he asks.

"Hmm?"

"Th-think they'll figure it o-ut in ti-me?"

"The other ones?"

"Yeah," Dean says. Thinks about the ease in his other self's skin that seemed to have left him forever ago. Wonders if he's sane enough to make use of it while it's still there.

"I—I don't know," Cas says. Dean hears rustling as he moves against his side. (It doesn't hurt so much, anymore. Everything's numb.) Cas pushes himself up, and Dean feels the tip of his nose against his cheek. Cas' forehead falls against his temple. Dean presses into the touch. "I hope so."

"Yeah," Dean says. "Me-me, too."

Dean thinks about what it could've been like, if they'd figured it out sooner. If they'd had the luxury to figure it out. What his future could've looked like.

A log cabin, he thinks. Some place to come home to. Hunting together, maybe. Holidays where he would cook. A guitar. Birthday sex, and pie, and holding hands under the covers. A couch. Dean would've loved a good couch. Memory foam on the bed.

Dean loses himself in this dream that seems real, and vivid, and bright. So fucking bright. Brings his lax hand up to the Cas' on his chest. Threads their fingers together.

"Sing for me," Cas asks. Curls his fingers around Dean's. Holds tight.

Dean's too far gone to sing. So he hums instead.

Cas mouths the lyrics against the skin of his neck.

Take a sad song, and make it better.

They tried, he thinks. Despite everything. They did try.

The sky is the kind of blue that means sandalled feet, and busy beaches. But Dean's not looking at it anymore.

At the end of everything, there's still him. There's still Cas.

And the sound of a song in the air.

It's not too bad, when all's said and done. It's not bad at all.

#doe's writing #destiel fic #endverse #mcd #end of all things or whatever #i watched eeaao and had the first line of this fic stuck in my head and also A Concept! #so i wrote it! #it's not going on ao3 bc I'm not convinced of its quality rn but maybe eventually #should I even tag my taglist I DON'T KNOE #I'LL LEAVE IT UP AND WE'LL SEE AFTER A NAP #okay thanks i hope you like it!. #spn fic #this one is sad! #angst

[dearmrshudson]

The post of saddest(?) supernatural moment gave me the idea to maka a list of my own... You know, an honest list which will not push any agenda or exclude one of the main character completely to forcefully feed to a romantic pair which does not even exist.

so here it goes-

10. Dean's reaction after Sam's death in 13x21 :

This one is so nominal and insignificant to be in this list and not one of top moments for a lot, but this scene ripped my heart open when I saw it for the first time. It manages to show us how Dean's whole world will literally fall apart and make him an empty vessel if Sam is gone and he can do nothing about it - and Jensen manages to portray it with just a walk, two blank eyes and then one drop of tear. Kudos.

9. Church Scene in 'Sacrifice' (8x23):

Anyone who has not cried in this scene? Perfeftly shows the core of the show, the deep love between two brothers- despite all the reasons, all the idiological differences, all the mature discussion and all- Sam is the baby brother of Dean; at the end he needs Dean to be there as a big bro, to tell him to let it go, to clutch him in his chest. Ultimately they will always choose each other and nothing else will come between them.

8. Dean's death in 9x23:

One of the saddest death of Dean, and perhaps it comes to this list because of the build-up and drama follows this. Both had their own reasons for the tension they had this whole season, but when the tragedy comes it hits so hard that all those logics fell apart. It scares to peep in Sam's headspace at this time of dean's dying- imagine you discarding the person you love the most as you are reasonably angry with him, and in a few days he is dying in your arms when you have hardly talked out your differences.

7. Why don’t you believe in us too (14x12) :

Probably should come much later in this list, but this scene stood out in my eyes because it was such a fresh air in the terrible plotless mimicry that SPN had become in later seasons. The scene after ages which sums up Sam and Dean, the codependent brothers whom we had forgotten. Such a long time after we see Sam the little brother, witness the emotional turmoil he was going through silently and how it exploded. The only scene which makes season 14 worth remembering. Also Jared just nailed this scene!

6.) Dead or Alive (3x16):

This scene breaks my heart in pieces. Dean bravely going for the last fight before the horrible death he will be facing. And he trying to cheer up baby bro, he wants the last memory with his brother to be in this car- singing along together... How his face slowly glooms at the end and his eyes full of fear... Early seasons really were gems!

5. Sam in Mystery spot (3x11) :

Undoubtedly one of the best SPN episode with perfect blend of mystery, fun, laughter, tragedy and emotion... The funny vibe of the episode ends in a moment when we see Sam is not waking up from the nightmare loop. Then we see a robot- a scary robot who only wants to get his brother back at any cost. This episode is yet another example of how Sam loves Dean just as fiercely as Dean does, and he is not any less codependent.

4. Barn scene and alone Sam (15x20) :

God! What can I say about this!

Just want to add, Sam wandering alone in the bunker after creamating Dean hurts me equally.

3. John's death (2x01):

Cannot forget this one. This episode happens to be another favourite of mine, and the way John sacrifices himself for his son proves that a father can go to any extent for his children. The farewell scene of John - where he asks for forgiveness and goodbye to dean without him understanding brings tears to my eyes. Such a beautiful acting by JDM and so realistic portrayal of a flawed, helpless and loving father.

2. End of Season 5 (5x22)

The ground was set, the battle was about to begin, the ultimate faceoff between Lucifer and Michael was going to start- then what happens? A stubborn idiot boy with a muscle car and hellbent attitude comes in between- knowing that he cannot survive this- just because one of these celestial entities have captured his brother as a vessel and he won’t leave his brother alone. Till his last drop of blood he keeps on trying- trying to reach his brother who is trapped under something much bigger- keeps on telling that It's okay, he is not alone, his big brother is here. And guess what, he succeed. His brother broke free the bind of one of the strongest entity of universe and fought. The climax scene gives me goosebump always followed by a bunch of grief and saddness the ending carries. Had season 5 been the last season of SPN, and this be the exact way the series ended, I would absolutely have no regret!

1. Sammy's first Death (2x21):

No matter how many sad scenes are perfectly executed in SPN, nothing can exceed the emotion of this one. Jensen will also not be able to exceed the level of performance be set in this particular scene. Period.

So this is it... I must have excluded many. And turns out my list is full of Sam and Dean only and I am also not unbiased 🤣🤣 Well, there are sad scenes that do not involve only the brothers and I still like them, but not my top 10. Maybe have to make list of top 11 to 20 in order to include them. 😁

Please share your favourite saddest top 10 as well.

#supernatural #sam winchester #dean winchester #sam and dean #john winchester #spn #jensen ackles #j2 #anti destiel #top 10 list #jared padalecki #best episode

[layce2015]

Supernatural (Dean Winchester x Female!Reader)

The End

Masterlist pt 1

Masterlist pt 2

*3rd Person POV*

A religious man stands outside the hotel with a handful of pamphlets. He addresses a passerby while the Impala drives up. "Hi. Good evening, brother. Is your soul rapture-ready?" he asked as the passersby ignores him. "Thank you, sir. God bless." the man said and he addresses two more people as the Impala stops in front of the hotel.

"Good evening, folks. Is your soul rapture-ready? Because what I'd like to do is just show you exactly what God's love is for you." He said but the couple ignore him. "Okay, God bless." the man said as Dean and (y/n) get out of the Impala and head for the hotel. The religious man addresses them.

"Excuse me, friends, but have you taken time out to think about God's plan for you?" He asked and the two stop and look at him. "Too friggin' much, pal." Dean replied and the two enter the hotel while the man watches them go.

"We're talking about the Colt, right? I mean, as in the Colt?" Dean asked through the phone, which was on speaker so that (y/n) could hear, as he lays on the bed. "We are." Castiel replied through the phone while (y/n) brushes her teeth. "Well, that doesn't make any sense. I mean, why would the demons keep a gun around that, uh, kills demons?" Dean asked while on Castiel's side, a car goes by.

"What? What? Did—I didn't—I didn't get that." Castiel said and Dean and (y/n) laugh before she spits out the toothpaste and finished cleaning her teeth. "You know, it's kind of funny. Talking to a messenger of God on a cellphone. It's, you know, like watching a Hell's Angel ride a moped." (y/n) quips and Dean laughs. "This isn't funny, guys. The voice says I'm almost out of minutes." Castiel said. "Okay, all right. I'm—I'm telling you, Cas, the mooks have melted down the gun by now." Dean said.

"Well, Ariel and I hear differently. And if it's true and if you are still set on the insane task of killing the devil, this is how we do it." Castiel said. "Okay. Where do we start?" Dean asked him. "Where are you two now?" Castiel asked. "Kansas City." Dean replied as he leans across the bed to grab his room key off the bedside table. "Century Hotel, room 113." Dean said.

"I'll be there immediately." Castiel said and Dean sits up. "Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. No, no, come on, man. We just drove like sixteen hours straight, okay? (y/n) and I are humans. And there's stuff we got to do." Dean said.

"What stuff?" Castiel asked. "Eat, for example. In this case, sleep. We just need like four hours once in a while, okay?" Dean said. "Yes." Castiel said. "Okay, so, you can pop in tomorrow morning." Dean said. "Yes. I'll just—" Castiel said and Dean hangs up and sets his phone on the table by him.

"—wait here, then." Castiel said as he hears the dial tone then he shuts the phone and stands at the side of the road.

The couple were curled up to each other and were close to sleep when Dean's phone vibrates. "Seriously?" Dean grumbled, annoyed, while (y/n) sighed then leans over Dean to reach for his phone. "I'll tell him off." (Y/n) growled as she grabbed his phone.

"Well, look at you, taking control. Pretty hot, not gonna lie." Dean teased, flirtatiously, and smacks her ass. "You know, for someone that claimed they were tired, you sure are acting pretty frisky now." (y/n) said. "Always with you." He said, giving her a wink as she answers the phone. "Cas, I'm only gonna say this once, Dean and I need sleep!" she growls. "(Y/n), it's me." a familiar voice said, that wasn't Castiel nor was it Ariel's.

(y/n) sits up. "Sam? It's quarter past four." she said, confused, while Dean sits up as well at the mention of his brother's name. "This is important." Sam said. 

Later, (y/n) put Sam on speaker and Dean grabs a couple of beers out of the fridge and hands one to (y/n). "So, you're his vessel, huh? Lucifer's wearing you to the prom?" (y/n) asked. "That's what he said." Sam said. "Just when you thought you were out, they pull you back in, huh, Sammy?" Dean asked, sarcastically.

"So, that's it? That's your response?" Sam asked. "What are you looking for?" Dean asked. "I don't know. A—a little panic? Maybe?" Sam said. "I guess I'm a little numb to the earth-shattering revelations at this point. Cause we also found out, not long ago, that (y/n) is Ariel’s vessel." Dean said. "What?!" Sam exclaimed. "Yeah, but unlike you two, I'm not forced to say yes to her. She said I'm a last resort if Lucifer and Michael get both of you." (Y/n) said.

"What are we gonna do about it?" Sam asked. "What do you want to do about it?" Dean asked back. "I want back in, for starters." Sam said. "Sam—" Dean said but Sam talks over him. "I mean it. I am sick of being a puppet to these sons of bitches. I'm gonna hunt him down, guys." He said.

"Oh, so, we're back to revenge, then, are we? Yeah, 'cause that worked out so well last time." Dean said, sarcastically. "Not revenge. Redemption." Sam said and Dean takes his phone out of (y/n)'s hand.

"So, what, you're just gonna walk back in and we're gonna be the terriffic trio again?" Dean asked. "Look, Dean, I can do this. I can. I'm gonna prove it to you." Sam said. "Look, Sam—it doesn't matter—whatever we do. I mean, it turns out that you and me, we're the, uh, the fire and the oil of the Armageddon. You know, on that basis alone, we should just pick a hemisphere. Stay away from each other for good." Dean said and (y/n)'s eyes widen at this.

"Dean, it does not have to be like this. We can fight it." Sam said, sounding a bit upset. "Yeah, you're right. We can. But not together. We're not stronger when we're together, Sam. I think we're weaker. Because whatever we have between us—love, family, whatever it is—they are always gonna use it against us. And you know that. Yeah, we're better off apart. We got a better chance of dodging Lucifer and Michael and this whole damn thing, if we just go our own ways." Dean said.

"Dean, don't do this." Sam pleads. "Bye, Sam." Dean said and he hangs up. "You don't mean that." (Y/n) said as Dean turns away from her. "Yes, I do." He said and (y/n) stands up. “You know what? I’m tired of biting my tongue here, Dean.” (Y/n) said and Dean shakes his head at her. “(Y/n) I’m tired. Let’s just go to sleep and talk about this later.” He muttered.

“No! We’re having this talk now. I know you miss him.” (Y/n) said and Dean shakes his head again, as if such an idea was idiotically. “You do, Dean. It’s written all over your face!” She said. “Oh is it?” Dean asked, in a deadpan tone. “I miss him too and I’m sure he misses us.” (Y/n) said. “That’s sweet.” Dean said, sarcastically. (Y/n) let out a huff, becoming really irritated with his attitude. 

“And you’re being really stubborn about keeping him away.” She said, trying her best to remain calm. “I’m doing this for you and him.” Dean declared. “You know what you just said to him, how we're better when we're apart. It’s a bunch of crap.” (Y/n) growled. “It’s the truth!” Dean said, his voice rising. “Being apart is what started the apocalypse in the first place!” (Y/n) exclaimed. “What started the apocalypse, was him listening to Ruby over us!” Dean shouted.

“No, what started the apocalypse was you going to hell!” (Y/n) yelled, instantly regretting her words. Dean stares at her in shock then turns his back on her, so she can’t see his face.

(Y/n) slowly reaches towards him then looks down, ashamed for what she said. “I’m sorry. That went too far.” She said, apologetically, then raises her head to look at him. “But think about it, Dean. Every time crap hits the fan is when we’re apart.” She said.

“You know what I think?” Dean asked, keeping his back towards her. (Y/n) held her breath, a little in premonition. Dean turns to look at her with a hard glare. “It sounds like I should have never sold my soul for you.” He said in a bitter tone, his anger making him feel justified in his words.

(Y/n)'s eyes widen, so shock she’s almost frozen for a moment, unsure of how to react. “Maybe you shouldn’t have.” She mumbled, tears welling up in her eyes. Dean continues to glare at her, not seeming to realize his mistake.

(Y/n) turns, staggering for a moment, and hastily walks towards the door. “Where are you going?” Dean asked. “I’m getting my own room.” (Y/n) replied, sharply, opening the door and walking out. “(Y/n)!” Dean yelled after her but she slams the door behind her. Dean turns away, running his hands through his hair, irritably. “Damnit!” He exclaimed, kicking over a chair.

(Y/n) enters her room, that was located on the other side of the motel, as far away from Dean’s room as possible. She drops the room key on the table and nearly collapse when she reaches the bed.

Her hands were shaking and whole body was trembling as she was still reeling from what Dean said to her. She takes out her cellphone and keeps her hands steady just enough to dial Sam’s number.

She held the phone to her ear with one hand and held her other hand to her lips, trying to keep herself from breaking down. “Hello.” Sam said when he answers. “S-Sam.” (Y/n) stammered, tears escaping from her eyes so easily. “(Y/n)? What’s wrong?” Sam asked, in a concerned tone. “I-I…” (Y/n) tried to say, but she was unable to form the words and she starts to cry. “Hey, hey, hey. It’s alright, I’m right here.“ Sam said, softly.

“You're not.” (Y/n) said through her tears and Sam sighs. “I know. But I’m still here to talk to. And if I have to, I’ll drive all night to you so you can have a shoulder to cry on.” He said and (Y/n) smiles a little.

“Tell me what’s wrong.” Sam said and (Y/n) sniffs, roughly wiping her cheek. “I’ll try. It all started after Dean got off the phone with you…”

Meanwhile, Dean wakes up and finds himself lying on the springs of the hotel bed; the mattress gone. He gets up and looks around to see that the entire room is trashed. He looks out the window to see that so is the city. Dean leaves the hotel and takes a look around; the area is devastated, everything broken or graffitied on or both.

He hears something, like glass smashing. He goes to investigate. The first sign of life Dean sees is a girl in an alley with a teddy bear. He approaches her slowly. "Little girl? Little girl?" he called out but the girl doesn't respond. "Are you hurt?" he asked the girl but again the girl says nothing.

"You know the not-talking thing is kind of creepy, right?" Dean said but blood starts to drip from the girl's mouth. The girl shrieks and attacks Dean with a shard of glass. He flattens her and looks around, catching sight of a large piece of graffiti: it reads "CROATOAN". "Oh, crap." he mutters.

Several people, all most likely infected with the Croatoan virus the same as the girl, come around the corner and he runs. They chase him onto a street blocked by a chain-link fence until several soldiers on tanks arrive, shooting the infected people. 

As more infected people fall from the gunshots, Dean stays under cover and retreats to an alley and breaks through the fence. A sign on the fence reads:

CROATOAN

VIRUS

HOT ZONE

NO ENTRY

BY ORDER OF ACTING REGIONAL COMMAND

AUGUST 1, 2014

KANSAS CITY

"August first, 2014." Dean reads then he goes over to a nearby cat and hotwires it.

Night had fallen as Dean drives around. There is no cell service and only static on the radio. "That's never a good sign." Dean mutters to himself. "Croatoan pandemic reaches Australia." A voice said, startling Dean. He turns and sees Zachariah sitting in the shotgun seat, reading a newspaper.

"I thought I smelled your stink on this Back to the Future crap." Dean grumbles. "President Palin defends bombing of Houston." Zachariah reads then he chuckles. "Certainly a buyer's market in real estate. Let's see what's happening in sports. That's right—no more sports. Congress revoked the right to group assembly. What's left of Congress, that is. Hardly a quorum, if you ask me." He said.

"How did you find me?" Dean asked him. "Afraid we had to tap some unorthodox resources of late—human informants. We've been making inspirational visits to the fringier Christian groups. They've been given your image, told to keep an eye out." Zachariah said and Dean has a look of realization on his face. "The Bible freak outside the motel—he, what, dropped a dime on me?" Dean asked and Zachariah smiles. "Onward, Christian soldiers." he chuckles and Dean scoffs and shakes his head.

"And where's (y/n)?" Dean asked him. "We left her alone. Seemed that she was very upset." Zachariah said and Dean frowns and does everything to bite his tongue, but the feeling of guilt was settling in his chest. "It looked like there was...what is it you humans say...trouble in paradise?" Zachariah said, a bit of a smirk on his face, and Dean grips the steering wheel, tighter.

The angel takes notice of this and he decided to keep pushing. "What did you do to her by the way? Hm?" Zachariah asked and Dean grits his teeth. "She finally had enough of you? Were you unable to fornicate with her?" Zachariah asked and Dean turns his head. "Shut up!" Dean growled and the Angel laughs.

"When the time comes, I'll make sure I'm the one who kills you." Dean threatened. "Oh, really? You kill me? Now that would be something." Zachariah laughs and Dean glares at him. "Okay, you've had your jollies. Now send me back, you son of a bitch." Dean growls. "Oh, you'll get back—all in good time. We want you to marinate a bit." Zachariah said.

"Marinate?" Dean asked. "Three days, Dean. Three days to see where this course of action takes you." said Zachariah. "What's that supposed to mean?" asked Dean. "It means that your choices have consequences. This is what happens to the world if you continue to say no to Michael. Have a little look-see." Zachariah said then he vanishes.

The next morning, Dean opens the door to Bobby's house. "Bobby? Bobby, I'm coming in!" he calls out as he looks around. The place is pretty thoroughly trashed, and from the spiderwebs and dust, no one has been around in a while. "Oh, no." he whispers as he sees Bobby's wheelchair on its side. Dean sets it upright and sees the bullet holes through and dried blood on the back of the seat.

"Where is everybody, Bobby?" Dean said then he opens a hidden compartment and pulls out Bobby's journal. He finds a photo of Bobby with Castiel, threeunidentified men, and a sign. "Camp Chitaqua." He mutters.

Dean approaches the sign from the photo to see men with guns are just inside the fence, patrolling. Dean does his best to stay out of sight. He catches sight of the Impala, smashed up and rusted to hell.

"Oh, baby, no." He said, despairingly, as he approaches the Impala for a better look at the damage, peering inside the driver's side door. "Oh, no, baby, what did they do to you?" he asked when he hears something and has barely turned to look when he is knocked out by another Dean, identified by the military-issue green jacket he is wearing instead of Dean's blue shirt.

Dean wakes up and discovers he is handcuffed to a ladder. He looks across the room to see himself cleaning a gun. "What the hell?" Dean asked as his Future-Self glares at him. "I should be asking that question, don't you think? In fact, why don't you give me one good reason why I shouldn't gank you right here and now?" he asked. "Because you'd only be hurting yourself." Dean said. "Very funny." Future Dean  sneered.

"Look, man—I'm no shapeshifter or demon or anything, okay?" Dean said. "Yeah, I know. I did the drill while you were out. Silver, salt, holy water—nothing. But you know what was funny? Was that you had every hidden lockpick, box cutter, and switchblade that I carry. Now, you want to explain that? Oh, and the, uh, resemblance, while you're at it?" Dean asked. "Zachariah." Dean replied and Future Dean stands up.

"Come again?" he asked. "I'm you from the tail end of 2009. Zach plucked me from my bed and threw me five years into the future." Dean replied. "Where is he? I want to talk to him." Future Dean demanded. "I don't know." Dean said. "Oh, you don't know." Future Dean growls. "No, I don't know. Look, I just want to get back to my own friggin' year, okay?" Dean yells. "Okay. If you're me, then tell me something only I would know." Future Dean demanded.

Dean thinks, then smirks. "Rhonda Hurley. We were, uh, nineteen. She made us try on her panties. They were pink. And satiny. And you know what? We kind of liked it." Dean said and his future self kinda smirked. "Touché." he said then he sighs.

"So, what, Zach zapped you up here to see how bad it gets?" he asked. "I guess. Croatoan virus, right? That's their endgame?" Dean asked. "It's efficient, it's incurable, and it's scary as hell. Turns people into monsters. Started hitting the major cities about two years ago. World really went in the crapper after that." Future Dean replied 

"What about Sam and (y/n)?" Dean asked and his future self goes still. "Heavyweight showdown in Detroit. From what I understand, Sam didn't make it." Future Dean said. "You weren't with him?" Dean asked. "No. No, me and Sam, we haven't talked in—hell, five years." Future Dean replied.

"We never tried to find him?" Dean asked. "We had other people to worry about." Future Dean said. "And (y/n)?" Dean asked, a bit nervously, and his Future Self's eyes shifts a bit before responding. "She's...gone." he replied. "Gone? What do you mean gone?" Dean asked and Future Dean glares at him then starts to walk away.

"Where you going?" Dean asked him. "I got to run an errand." Future Dean said. "Whoa. You're just gonna leave me here?" Dean asked him. "Yes. I got a camp full of twitchy trauma survivors out there with an apocalypse hanging over their head. The last thing they need to see is a version of The Parent Trap. So, yeah, you stay locked down." Future Dean said as he stops and turns to him again. "Okay. All right. Fine. But you don't have to cuff me, man." Dean yells and his future self goes to walk away again.

"Oh, come on. You don't trust yourself?" Dean asked as his future self gets to the door, stops and turns. "No. Absolutely not." He replied then he leaves. "Dick." Dean grumbles then he pries a nail out of the floorboards and uses it to remove the handcuffs.

Minutes later, he glances around the camp when someone comes up behind him. "Hey, Dean. You got a second?" a voice asked and Dean turns around to see that it was Chuck. "No—yes. Uh, I—I guess. Hi, Chuck." Dean said, shaking his head. "Hi. So, uh, listen, we're pretty good on canned goods for now, but we're down to next to nothing on perishables and—and hygiene supplies. People are not gonna be happy about this. So, what do you think we should do?" Chuck asked him.

"I—I don't know. Maybe, uh, share? You know, like at a kibbutz." Dean replied, shrugging. "Wait a minute, aren't you supposed to be out on a mission right now?" Chuck asked, confused. "Absolutely. And I will be." Dean said and he hears some footsteps behind him.

He turns to see a woman walking up to him. "Hello, Dean." She greets. "Hey, uh..." Dean stops. "Risa." Chuck whispered to him. "Risa." Dean said. "So, I was wondering...did you ever give my proposal a thought?" She asked, a seductive smile on her lips. Dean slightly shakes his head in confusion. "What?" He asked and she let's out a small giggle.

"You know...about...you know...you and me..." she asked and Dean catches on. "Look, sweetheart, I appreciate it but...I'm a one woman man." Dean said and Risa let's out a harsh scoff. "Seriously? You're still holding onto that vegetable?!" She asked, angry and annoyed, and Dean gives her a confused look. "Come again?" He asked. "I mean, I can do so much more than her!" She yells. "I don't understand..." Dean started to say but Risa huffs out a breath. "Screw you." she growls and she walks past him.

"Oh, jeez. I'm getting bitched at for stuff I haven't even done yet." Dean exclaims. "What?" Chuck asked. "Uh, never mind. Hey, Chuck, is...Cas still here?" Dean asked him. "Yeah. I don't think Cas is going anywhere." Chuck said.

Chuck leads Dean to another cabin and he enters. Castiel is sitting in a circle with several women. "So, in this way. We're each a fragment of total perception—just, uh, one compartment in that dragonfly eye of group mind. Now, the key to this total, shared perception—it's, um, it's surprisingly physical." He said then he spots Dean. "Oh. Excuse me, ladies. I think I need to confer with our fearless leader for a minute. Why not go get washed up for the orgy?" Castiel said and this takes Dean aback as the women leave.

"You're all so beautiful." Castiel compliments the women and he stands and stretches his back, grunting. "What are you, a hippie?" Dean asked him. "I thought you'd gotten over trying to label me." Castiel grumbles.

"Cas, we got to talk." Dean said and Castiel looks at him. "Whoa. Strange." he said, surprised. "What?" Dean asked. "You...are not you. Not now you, anyway." said Castiel. "No! Yeah. Yes, exactly." Dean said.

"What year are you from?" Castiel asked him. "2009." Dean replied. "Who did this to you? Is it Zachariah?" Castiel asked. "Yes." Dean said. "Interesting." Castiel said, fascinated. "Oh, yeah, it's friggin' fascinating. Now. Why don't you strap on your angel wings and fly me back to my page on the calendar?" Dean asked. "I wish I could just, uh, strap on my wings, but I'm sorry, no dice." Castiel said.

"What, are you stoned?" Dean asked. "Uh, generally, yeah." Castiel replied. "What happened to you?" Dean asked and Castiel shrugs. "Life." he said and Dean sighs and runs his hands over his face.

"Okay, what about Ariel? Is she here? If she is can you take me to her..." Dean asked but he noticed the look of sadness on his face. "What?" Dean asked. "Ariel...that's a name I haven't heard in awhile...." Castiel said, downtrodden. "Why? What happened to her?" Dean asked, curiously.

Castiel look back at him, the sadness reflecting in his eyes. "She's dead." He said, softly, and Dean's eyes widen in shock. "Dead? How?" Dean asked. Castiel stares at him with this sad puppy dog eyes and was about to speak when they hear the sounds vehicles coming.

They walk out to see a car and a jeep had arrived and Future Dean and some soldiers climb out. Future Dean grabs two beers and tosses one to a soldiers. They both open the beers and drink but then Future Dean draws his gun and points it at that soldier.

"Hey. Hey! Watch out!" Dean shouts as he runs but Future Dean shoots the soldier. Dean runs up too late and the survivors looked between the two Deans. "Damn it." Future Dean grumbles then he addresses the soldiers. "I'm not gonna lie to you. Me and him—It's a pretty messed-up situation we got going. But believe me, when you need to know something, you will know it. Until then, we all have work to do." he said.

Later, Future Dean shoves Dean into the room and shuts the door behind them. "What the hell was that?" Future Dean asked him, angrily. "What the hell was that? You just shot a guy in cold blood." Dean yelled back, angrily. "We were in an open quarantine zone. Got ambushed by some Croats on the way out." Future Dean said and Dean's expression asks for an explanation.

"Croats. Croatoans. One of them infected Yeager." Future Dean clarifies. "How do you know?" Dean asked him. "'Cause after a few years of this, I know. I started seeing symptoms about a half an hour ago. Wasn't gonna be long before he flipped. I didn't see the point in troubling a good man with bad news." Future Dean said. "Troubling a good man? You just blew him away in front of your own people. Don't you think that freaked them out a little bit?" Dean asked.

"It's 2014. Plugging some Croat, it's called commonplace. Trading words with my friggin' clone—that might have freaked them out a little." Future Dean growls. "All right, look—" Dean started to say but Future Dean talks over him. "No, you look. This isn't your time. It's mine. You don't make the decisions. I do. So, when I say stay in, you stay in." Future Dean yelled, angrily.

"All right, man. I'm sorry. Look, I—I'm not trying to mess you—me—us up here." Dean said, apologetically, and his Future self sighs and calms down. "I know." he said and he pours two glasses of alcohol.

"It's just been a really wacky weekend." Dean said. "Tell me about it." Future Dean said as he hands the other glass to Dean and they drink.

"What was the mission, anyway?" Dean asked him and Future Dean pulls out a gun; it's the Colt. "The Colt?" Dean said, shocked. "The Colt." Future Dean said, firmly. "Where was it?" Dean asked him. "Everywhere. They've been moving it around. Took me five years, but...I finally got it. And tonight—tonight, I'm gonna kill the devil." Future Dean said.

"So, that's it? That's the Colt?" Risa asked after her and Castiel come in in the room with the two Deans'. "If anything can kill Lucifer, this is it." Future Dean said. "Great. Have we got anything that can find Lucifer?" Risa asked, a bit annoyed, and Future Dean turns to her.

"Are you okay?" He asked her. "Oh, she's mad about how you won't give her a chance cause you are hung up on some vegetable...?" Dean said, questionable, and his future self turns his head, sharply, to him. "You want to shut up?" He asked, angrily, and Dean raises his hands in surrender.

"And Risa, you know not to call her that and I'm not gonna give up on her. Is that clear?" Future Dean said, firmly, and Risa frowns then turns her head away. "Anyway...We don't have to find Lucifer. We know where he is. The demon that we caught last week, he was one of the big guy's entourage. He knew." Future Dean said.

"So, a demon tells you where Satan's gonna be, and you just believe it?" Risa asked him, disbelieving. "Oh, trust me, he wasn't lying." Future Dean said. "And you know this how?" Risa asked. "Our fearless leader, I'm afraid, is all too well schooled in the art of getting to the truth." Castiel said and Dean turns to his future self.

"Torture?" Dean asked and neither Castiel nor future Dean respond. "Oh, so, we're—we're torturing again." Dean grumbles and his Future self looks at him. "No, that's—that's good. Classy." Dean said, sarcastically, and Castiel laughs. Future Dean looks at him. "What? I like past you." Castiel said, defensively, and Future Dean rolls his eyes.

"Lucifer is here. Now. I know the block and I know the building." Future Dean said. "Oh, good—it's right in the middle of a hot zone." said Castiel. "Crawling with Croats, yeah. You saying my plan is reckless?" Future Dean asked him. "Are you saying we, uh, walk in straight up the driveway, past all the demons and the Croats, and we shoot the devil?" Castiel asked. "Yes." Future Dean said.

"Okay, if you don't like, uh, 'reckless', I could use 'insouciant', maybe." Castiel said. "Are you coming?" Future Dean asked him and Castiel sighs. "Of course. But why is he? I mean, he's you five years ago. If something happens to him, you're gone, right?" Castiel asked as he gestures to Dean.

"He's coming." Future Dean said, firmly. "Okay. Well, uh. I'll get the grunts moving." Castiel said. "We're loaded and on the road by midnight." Future Dean said. "All righty." Castiel said and he and Risa leave but Castiel turns to Future Dean. "You gonna see her before you leave?" He asked him.

Future Dean stares at him, looks over at Dean, as if he was thinking of something, then turns back to Castiel. "Yes." He replied and Castiel nods before he walks out.

"Why are you taking me?" Dean asked his future self. "Relax. You'll be fine. Zach's looking after you, right?" Future Dean asked. "No, that's not what I mean. I want to know what's going on. And who is her?" Dean asked him. "Yeah, okay. You're coming because I want you to see something. But first, there is someone I want you to see." Future Dean said.

Minutes later, Future Dean takes Dean into a small building, a bit away from the other buildings, and they enter it. Inside, unlike other buildings, there was only one bed in the middle of the room which had one occupant in it.

Dean furrows his brow at this as his future self starts to walk towards the bed. He slowly walks up to the figure and kneels down to the front of the figure. "Hey, (y/n)." Future Dean said in a soft, quiet voice. Dean was taken aback by this and he slowly walks around to the side.

His eyes widen and he jumped slightly at the sight before him. The (y/n) that was sitting on the bed looked guant and weak, nothing like the (y/n) Dean knew. She also looked like she wasn't there, mentally. She looked lost.

She raises her head, slowly, once she heard future Dean's voice. There was a twitch of a smile on her lips as she looks at future Dean.

"Hey, baby." Future Dean said to her, softly. She raises a hand and places it on his cheek. "I've come by to let you know that I'm heading out again. I'm gonna take out and kill those sons of bitches that did this to you." Future Dean said to her. Then he leaves a long, lingering kiss on her forehead.

The short amount of time Dean had spent with his future self, this was the first time he had seen him look and sound vulnerable. "You should rest, sweetheart." Future Dean said to (y/n) and he starts to stand up but she grabs his arm.

"Don't...go..." (y/n) said, weakly. It honestly freaked Dean out on how (y/n) spoke. She not only looked awful but she sounded just as bad if not worse. She looked and sounded like she aged 70-80 years.

"Honey, I have to. I found the Colt." Future Dean said as he places a hand over hers. "Colt?" (Y/n) asked and Future Dean nods. "Yes, and I'm gonna kill him with it." He assures her and she continues to look at him. "I need to go, sweetheart." Future Dean said but she doesn't remove her hand off of his arm.

"Don't...go...Don't...go..." (y/n) repeated until she started to become hysterical and was hitting Future Dean's chest with a weak fist and he tries to calm her down but that just upsets her more and she begins to scream and cry.

Dean was horrified at this as Future Dean digs into his pocket with his free hand and pulls out a needle. "No!" Dean shouts but Future Dean sticks the needle into her neck. She stops, calms down then starts to slump forward. Future Dean catches her in his arms and she passes out then he starts to carry her back to her bed.

"What the hell did you do to her?!" Dean asked his future self as he set (y/n) back down on the bed. "Had to sedate her." Future Dean replied, plainly, then he stands up and looks back at Dean. "What happened to her? You said she was gone!" Dean yelled as he walks over towards his future self.

"Yeah, mentally. Physically, no. You see she was my partner when the Croats started to rise. We became leaders to the people. But a few months back, she was captured by some demons. We couldn't find her for months until just about a month ago when me and few men raided an old house and found some demons inside. We took care of the ones that didn't run off then we searched the house until we found her. I don't know what kind of torture method they used on her but we found her like this." Future Dean explained as he gestures towards the passed out (y/n).

"Why didn't you kill her? You killed a man earlier, no hesitation, but her you've kept locked away?!" Dean asked, confused. "Because I couldn't bring myself to do it, okay!!" Future Dean yells and Dean leans back a bit. "So you wanted me to see her?" Dean asked. "Yes, and I also want you to see our brother." Future Dean said and Dean furrows his brow.

"Sam? I thought he was dead." He said. "Sam didn't die in Detroit. He said 'yes'." Future Dean said. "Yes?" Dean asked and there was a long silence between them until Dean realized what he meant.

"Wait. You mean—"

"That's right. The big 'yes'. To the devil. Lucifer's wearing him to the prom." Future Dean said. "Why would he do that?" Dean asked. "Wish I knew. But now we don't have a choice. It's in him, and it's not getting out. And we've got to kill him, Dean. And you need to see it—the whole damn thing, how bad it gets—so you can do it different." Future Dean explained.

"What do you mean?" Dean asked. "Zach said he was gonna bring you back, right? To oh-nine?" Future Dean asked. "Yeah." Dean said. "Well, when you get back home—you say 'yes'. You hear me? Say 'yes' to Michael." Future Dean said. "That's crazy. If I let him in, then Michael fights the devil. The battle's gonna torch half the planet. That is if Ariel doesn't stop it." said Dean.

"Look around you, man. Half the planet's better than no planet, which is what we have now. If I could do it over again, I'd say 'yes' in a heartbeat." Future Dean said. "So why don't you?" Dean asked. "I've tried! I've shouted 'yes' till I was blue in the face! The angels aren't listening! They just—left—gave up! It's too late for me, but for you—" Future Dean said and Dean shakes his head.

"Oh, no. There's got to be another way." He said. "Yeah, that's what I thought. I was cocky. Never actually thought I'd lose. But I was wrong. Dean. I was wrong. I'm begging you. Say yes." Future Dean said then there was another long pause. "But you won't. 'Cause I didn't. Because that's just not us, is it?" Future Dean asked.

"So, you're really from oh-nine?" Chuck asked Dean as they head to the vehicles that night. "Yeah, afraid so." Dean said. "Some free advice? You ever get back there, you hoard toilet paper. You understand me? Hoard it. Hoard it like it's made of gold. 'Cause it is." Chuck said and Dean turns his head to him. "Thank you, Chuck." he said.

"Oh, you'll thank me, all right. Mark my words." Chuck said. "I'll see you around." Dean tells him as he pats his shoulder. "Yeah. Okay." Chuck said as Dean gets in one of the vehicles and they drive off.

Dean is riding shotgun in Castiel's car and sees Castiel taking some pills. "Let me see those." Dean said, holding his hand out. "You want some?" Castiel asked as he hands the bottle to him and Dean reads the label. "Amphetamines?" he asked. "It's the perfect antidote to that absinthe." Castiel said.

"Mmm. Don't get me wrong, Cas. I, uh. I'm happy that the stick is out of your ass, but—what's going on—w-with the drugs and the orgies and the love-guru crap?" Dean asked him and Castiel laughs. "What's so funny?" Dean asked, confused.

"Dean, I'm not an angel anymore." Castiel informed, shocking Dean. "What?" he asked. "Yeah, I went mortal." Castiel said. "What do you mean? How?" Dean asked. "I think it had something to do with the other angels leaving. But when they bailed, my mojo just kind of— psshhew!—drained away. And now, you know, I'm practically human. I mean, Dean, I'm all but useless. Last year, broke my foot, laid up for two months." Castiel said. "Wow." Dean mutters. "Yeah." Castiel replied.

"So, you're human. Well, welcome to the club." Dean said. "Thanks. Except I used to belong to a much better club. And now I'm powerless. I'm hapless, I'm hopeless. I mean, why the hell not bury myself in women and decadence, right? It's the end, baby. That's what decadence is for. Why not bang a few gongs before the lights go out? But then that's, that's just how I roll." Castiel said, shrugging.

"How did Ariel die?" Dean asked him and Castiel sighs. "She, stupidly, went after Lucifer after Sam said yes to him. She thought she'd be strong enough to stop him but..." Castiel stops, bites his lips then swallows. "I'm sorry." Dean said and Castiel nods a bit.

Later, Dean, Future Dean, Castiel, Risa and a few other soldiers walk towards the sanitarium, carrying guns and scanning the area. "There. Second-floor window. We go in there." Future Dean said as they got closer to the building. "You sure about this?" Risa asked him. "They'll never see us coming. Trust me. Now, weapons check. We're on the move in five." Future Dean said.

"Hey, uh, me. Can I talk to you for a sec?" Dean said and he and his Future-Self go off to the side. "Tell me what's going on." Dean said. "What?" Future Dean asked, playing dumb. "I know you. You're lying to these people and to me." Dean said. "Is that so." Future Dean said.

"Yeah. See, I know your lying expressions. I've seen them in the mirror. Now, there's something you're not telling us." Dean growls. "I don't know what you're talking about." Future Dean said, continuing to playing dumb. "Oh, really? Well, I don't seem to be the only member of your posse with some questions, so, uh, maybe I'll just take my doubts over to them." Dean said and he starts to walk away but Future Dean stops him. "Okay, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait." He said and Dean turns to him.

"What?" Dean asked. "Take a look around you, man. This place should be white-hot with Croats. Where are they?" Future Dean asked him and Dean looks around. "They cleared a path for us. Which means that this is—" Dean said and his future self nods. "A trap. Exactly." he said.

"Well, then we can't go through the front." Dean said. "Oh, we're not. They are. They're the decoys. You and me, we're going in through the back." Future Dean said. "You mean you're gonna feed your friends into a meat grinder? Cas, too? You want to use their deaths as a diversion?" Dean asked and his Future-Self looks away.

"Oh, man, something is broken in you. You're making decisions that I would never make. I wouldn't sacrifice my friends." Dean said. "You're right. You wouldn't. It's one of the main reasons we're in this mess, actually." Future Dean said. "These people count on you. They trust you." Dean said, desperately. "They trust me to kill the devil and to save the world and that's exactly what I'm gonna do." Future Dean growls. "No. Not like this, you're not. I'm not gonna let you." Dean said, firmly.

"Oh, really?" Future Dean asked. "Yeah." Dean said before his Future-Self slugs him in the face, knocking him out.

Dean wakes up on the ground and hears gunfire in the building and runs toward it. Thunder crashes, lightning flashes, and Dean sees his Future-Self on the ground, neck held down by a person wearing a white suit. Future Dean opens his eyes and sees Dean until the person shifts his weight, breaking Future Dean's neck. The person, Dean sees, is Sam but not; it's Lucifer. He turns around and sees Dean.

"Oh. Hello, Dean." Lucifer greets as Dean stares at him. "Aren't you a surprise." Lucifer said then in a flash of lightning and a roar of thunder, he is now behind Dean. "You've come a long way to see this, haven't you?" Lucifer asked him.

"Well, go ahead. Kill me." Dean said as he turns to face him. "Kill you?" Lucifer asked, confused, then looks at the corpse of Future Dean. "Don't you think that would be a little...redundant?" Lucifer asked before he sighs. "I'm sorry. It must be painful, speaking to me in this—shape. But it had to be your brother. It had to be." he said and he reaches for Dean's shoulder but Dean moves back.

"You don't have to be afraid of me, Dean. What do you think I'm going to do?" Lucifer asked. "I don't know. Maybe deep-fry the planet?" Dean said and Lucifer walks off to the side and examines a rose, but turns away. "Why? Why would I want to destroy this stunning thing? Beautiful in a trillion different ways. The last perfect handiwork of God." he said but Dean doesn't answer.

"You ever hear the story of how I fell from grace?" Lucifer asked Dean as he turns to him. "Oh, good God, you're not gonna tell me a bedtime story, are you? My stomach's almost out of bile." Dean said, with sarcasm. "You know why God cast me down? Because I loved him. More than anything. And then God created..." Lucifer said then he smirks. "You. The little...hairless apes. And then he asked all of us to bow down before you—to love you, more than him. And I said, Father, I can't. I said, These human beings are flawed, murderous. And for that, God had Michael cast me into hell. Now, tell me, does the punishment fit the crime? Especially, when I was right? Look at what six billion of you have done to this thing, and how many of you blame me for it."

"You're not fooling me, you know that? With this sympathy-for-the-devil crap. I know what you are." Dean growls. "What am I?" Lucifer asked, curiously. "You're the same thing, only bigger. The same brand of cockroach I've been squashing my whole life. An ugly, evil, belly-to-the-ground, supernatural piece of crap. The only difference between them and you is the size of your ego." Dean spat and Lucifer smiles. 

"I like you, Dean. I get what the other angels see in you. Goodbye. We'll meet again soon." He said and he turns to walk away. "You better kill me now!" Dean yells and Lucifer turns back.

"Pardon?" he asked. "You better kill me now. Or I swear, I will find a way to kill you. And I won't stop." Dean said, sternly. "I know you won't. I know you won't say yes to Michael, either. And I know you won't kill Sam. Whatever you do, you will always end up here. Whatever choices you make, whatever details you alter, we will always end up—here. I win. So, I win." Lucifer informs.

"You're wrong." Dean growls and Lucifer looks him over. "See you in five years, Dean." he said and he is gone once the thunder roars and the lightening strikes. Dean turns around and sees Zachariah behind him, reaching for his forehead with two fingers.

Dean leans against the kitchenette sink while Zachariah stands in front of him. "Oh, well, if it isn't the ghost of Christmas screw you." Dean growls. "Enough. Dean, enough. You saw it, right? You saw what happens. You're the only person who can prove the devil wrong. Just say yes." Zachariah said. "How do I know that this whole thing isn't one of your tricks? Huh? Some angel hocus-pocus?" Dean asked, suspiciously. 

"The time for tricks is over. Give yourself to Michael. Say yes and we can strike. Before Lucifer gets to Sam. Before billions die." Zachariah said and Dean considers this for a long moment, turning away from Zachariah. "Nah." Dean said and Zachariah's face turns to slight anger.

"Nah? You telling me you haven't learned your lesson?" He asked and Dean turns to him. "Oh, I've learned a lesson, all right. Just not the one you wanted to teach." he said. "Well, I'll just have to teach it again! Because I got you now, boy, and I'm never letting you—" Zachariah said but then Dean is gone. "Son of a..." Zachariah growls, annoyed and angry.

Dean turns around and sees Castiel behind and they were on the side of the road. "That's pretty nice timing, Cas." Dean said. "We had an appointment." Castiel said and Dean puts a hand on Castiel's shoulder. "Don't ever change." he said then he freezes. "What about (y/n)? She's still back there..." he said, slightly panicked. 

But then they hear a noise and he turns around to see Ariel with (y/n). Seeing this, made Dean feel relief. "Oh, thank God." He said and he runs over to (y/n). "You're okay!" He said and he embraces (y/n), who was surprised by this. "Dean? What the...?" (Y/n) started to ask but Dean looks down into her eyes then leans in and gives her a kiss.

"(Y/n), I am so sorry for what I said. You're right. I was being stubborn." Dean said once he breaks the kiss to look at her. "Wh-What changed your mind?" She asked him and Dean stops as he stares at her, that image of her from 2014 flashed in his mind.

"I don't want to get into that right now." He said and (y/n) looks into his eyes then nods, slightly. "But...I want you to know that I love you, more than anything. And I'll be damned if I'm gonna let myself be so stubborn to the point I'll end up losing you." He said and she gives a small smile. "I love you, too. And I'm also sorry for things I've said." She said and she leans up and kisses him then they embrace each other.

"How did Zachariah find you?" Ariel asked and Dean looks up at her. "Long story. Let's just stay away from Jehovah's Witnesses from now on, okay?" he said and Ariel nods as Dean and (y/n) break the hug then he pulls out his phone.

"What are you doing?" Castiel asked as he walks up to them. "Something I should have done in the first place." Dean replied as he dials a number.

The next morning, Dean and (y/n) wait by the Impala, by a bridge, as another car pulls up. Sam gets out and the trio approach each other. "Sam." Dean said as (y/n) smiled at Sam. Dean pulls out Ruby's knife and Sam looks at it, nervously. Dean holds it out to Sam handle first. "If you're serious and you want back in...you should hang on to this. I'm sure you're rusty." Dean said and Sam takes the knife, he can't meet Dean's or (y/n)'s eyes.

"Look, man, I'm sorry. I don't know. I'm...whatever I need to be. But I was, uh—wrong." Dean said. "What made you change your mind?" Sam asked him. "Long story. The point is...maybe we are each other's Achilles heel. Maybe they'll find a way to use us against each other, I don't know. I just know we're all we've got. More than that. We keep each other human." Dean said as he gestures between the three of them.

"Thank you. Really. Thank you. I won't let you down." Sam said. "Oh, I know it. I mean, you are the third-best hunter on the planet." Dean said as he looks over at (y/n), who smirks, and Sam nods.

"So, what do we do now?" Sam asked him. "We make our own future." Dean said and (y/n) gives a soft chuckle. "Guess we have no choice." she said and Sam smiles a little. Then (y/n) goes over to Sam and hugs him, he hugs her back.

The trio back together once more.

@rach5ive @kitsun369 @itzabbyxx @cevans-winchester @ellie-andthemachine

#fandom #fanfic #fan fiction #reader insert #x reader #supernatural #dean winchester #dean winchester x you #dean x you #supernatural dean #dean winchester x y/n #dean x reader #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester imagine #dean winchester x female!reader #supernatural fanfic series #supernatural fandom #supernatural fanfiction #fantasy #horror #tv show fandom #tv shows #tv series #tv

[according2thelore]

oh GOD that ask answer was everything i dreamed and more. es!dean literally cannot imagine the kind of torture sam went through with lucifer. (which, incidentally, is one reason why ls!sam could never really replace ls!dean with him. he wakes up hyperventilating in the middle of the night and that slender boy is not enough. he needs his mountain man of a brother who Knows what’s out there.) and that kills him because he needs to know Everything About Sam. but sam is so so right to keep it from him - i don’t think es!dean could live with the knowledge, say, that sam is raped one day. i think it would actually end him.

ugggh i lvoe this au so much. you are a genius.

GRAHH you're so right!!!

sam wakes up one night straight from a nightmare and stumbles into the hallway, needing to find dean's room. he runs into ES!Dean, who's all it's okay, sam. it can't hurt you, it's just a vision--because he doesn't know! ES!Sam's nightmares can be soothed with gentle hands on his neck and shoulders, brushing bangs out of his eyes, dean promising that they'll fix it, and sam's safe.

but LS!Sam is going to throw up because this isn't a fixable thing. he feels suffocated by ES!Dean's firm hands on wrists, held down, and he pushes him away, hard.

LS!Dean shoves ES!Dean further away like you can't restrain him like that and ES!Dean pales bc he things he's caught on: someone held sam captive, maybe because of his powers. how could LS!Dean have arrived so clearly late, late enough that sam still carries the scars into his dreams?

and LS!Dean keeps muttering about first stones and c'mon sammy breathe with me and look at me and this is real. and LS!Sam kind of crumples and shoves himself under LS!Dean's arm, trying to make himself small and holdable, and ES!Dean just stands there and burns.

because there is clearly something here that's not right. something that LS!Sam&Dean have survived together, learned how to deal with, spent years adjusting to each other, and that's something ES!Dean is starting to realize they'll never tell him.

sam has always been a little inaccessible--he used to refuse to tell dean details about his girlfriend-of-the-weeks, he kept stanford a secret until he got his acceptance letter, he wouldn't tell dean what he was writing in all of those notebooks--but never the truly big, life-or-death stuff. and now sam--LS!Sam, anyway--is inaccessible. and it kills dean. dean wants to shrivel up and die because sammy is his. his responsibility, his to watch out for, his to mend, his to kill for.

he has never felt more purposeless or rudderless than he does right now--watching someone else comfort sam.

what he doesn't know, of course, would kill him. the fact that sam asks to be locked into a cage in hell, and dean will let him. the century of torture and rape and psychological hell that sam went through is a chasm that dean will never be able to fix. he can build a bridge, but that's all he can do.

it would kill ES!Dean. and LS!Sam knows it. so he reaches out a shaky hand in the gap between LS!Dean's arm and body, where he's wrapped sam in a bear hug.

ES!Dean rushes forward and grabs it, life finally having meaning again as sammy looks up at him with bloodshot eyes, with fingers that shake, and a voice that cracks when he says, "i'm okay, dean. thank you. i'm fine."

AGH!!!! anon, you get it <3 <3 hurt/comfort is my FUCKING bread and butter!!!!!!!! esp when it goes both ways!! because with these bozos, it literally would be!!

-lizzy

#ask box #lizzy answers #ES/LS verse #anon <3

[soullessjack]

good morning everypony here is my overly long caffeinated autistic analysis of the end scene from 14x19 ^_^

so for starters,

Jack’s glowy-archangel-eye color is canonically **gold.** not yellow like the princes of hell or shifters, but **gold.** Very shimmery, very sunshiny and starry and warm. yellow and gold are also the colors/aesthetics associated with jack most often in the fandom because of this so it’s his Thing™️ . however, in the smoky fiery background, they appear to be glowing so intently that they start to become a little…red …like Lucifer’s eyes so poignantly glow. the background is also extremely red (courtesy of the bunker going into lockdown, effectively *caging* them in), of course with some orangish yellows from the fire, but it’s very … “Lucifer in the background of Jack.”

secondly, jack is almost completely obscured by all of the smoke and backdrop fire/lockdown alarm lighting. if you zoom in close enough you can just barely see the white stripes on his cuffs, but otherwise he has absolutely no discernible features besides his glowing-out-of-skull eyes. he’s unrecognizable, vaguely human, but the prominent and most visible trait is the one he inherited from his nonhuman father, Lucifer, whose shadow he was pretty much born in and fought to get out of.

He feels nothing here but “icy hatred” and “fury,” and later on after he leaves he visits his grandparents specifically because “it’s clear—rejected by sam and dean—Jack’s looking for some kind of connection. Some kind of family.”

Lastly, of course, the utter destruction surrounding him; the twisted scrap metal remaining of his coffin, the numerous tiny fires that sprung from its’ demolition, the smoke that fills the entire dungeon so much that it engulfs and obscures Jack’s very being; it’s a very small scale of destruction compared to the “universe devouring” he was hyped up to deliver, but destruction nonetheless—and destruction in its own furious vengeful right, born from a deep sense of grief and pain of rejection and, like Fenrir, lashing out at being treated like a monster by those who you believe loved you; coming full circle into becoming that very monster in the process.

At his core, Jack’s base desires have almost always been to belong and have a family and be loved, especially for who he is, but he is also deeply afraid that ‘who he is’ is something evil and unlovable, something that can only ever destroy and ruin and take away; something that should die for the greater good of the world. he builds up a very specific well-mannered and optimistic hero/protector persona, not just to appear normal, but to be someone he thinks is “good” and useful and therefore worth loving, and the core fear of his “true nature” manifests as an avoidance of anything being ‘wrong’ with him in any capacity.

he lashes out at Mary over this direct fear, because she says something is wrong with him, and he can’t even cope with that with a soul. he tries to reassure Mary that “[he’s] not any different, that [he’s] still [himself]” and becomes defensive when she says otherwise; “the jack she knows would never have done that,” which, in his state of mind and rooted insecurity, would very easily translate into “you are not the person I know,” and likely goes even further to “you are not the person I know and love.” Mary insists on helping him, but Jack “shuts down; knows there’s nothing anyone can do.” He tells her that she can’t [help him] and just wants to be left alone as he begins spiraling, and we of course know the rest.

But afterwards, throughout Jack’s psychosis, Hallucifer basically tells him that he’s useless to the winchesters now, and useless = unlovable = not worth saving to them. He calls Jack their “pet monster,” “muscle to take out their enemies,” and just “pet,” diminishing Jack’s place in the family as their surrogate son (and likewise, them as his surrogate fathers), and reinforcing that he’s still a monster to them, and one that’s only valued or “loved” for his power. vocalizing his subconscious fear. He also taunts Jack’s obsessive motivation to resurrect Mary and, presumably earn forgiveness/regain his place in the family, as pathetic; not just a pointless effort to fix the unfixable, but something he shouldn’t even care about or want anymore, because he doesn’t really belong there anyways. The grief he feels for Mary is “just a reflex” from having a soul, not a genuine emotion or motivation that Jack still has; it’s not really about her, it’s about him being loved again. all of which Jack responds to with increasingly agitated “Shut ups.” And remember, that these are literally Jack’s own thoughts; his intrusive thoughts and long-held insecurities.

much like when Michael said he’d become more powerful and less human as he got older, and Jack “didn’t want to admit it was possible,” — he’s afraid to admit the possibility that he’s doing this selfishly; that he’ll never be loved again, that he was never really loved to begin with; that this is it. This is his true nature, the evil and destructive and pathetic unlovable pet monster that’s only good for being shown an enemy and told “sic-’em, boy.” he’s afraid that he might be doing this selfishly and is adamant that it’s because he really loves Mary. he really wants her back, too. he also goes and does those biblical atrocity murders with the same motivation, so much so that it actually irritates Duma to see he still cares lmao.

it’s a horrible culmination of grief and fear from the same root place, a horrible desire to be loved. to desire is to suffer and such. and that specific obsessive grief-stricken desire to be loved is intimately what twists jack into that unrecognizable rage-filled shadow.

jack’s desire to be loved and his fear of becoming/always being an unlovable monster is ultimately what drove him to becoming that monster.

@dakrapatops @dragonsareattackinghogwarts @aurorasleepsin @shallowseeker @honeyedwhiskey @jvnkless @ / anyone else I forgot lol

#feast your eyes mateys 🏴‍☠️🏴‍☠️🏴‍☠️ #spn #supernatural #spn meta #supernatural meta #spn analysis #character analysis #jack kline #jack spn #tfw2.0 #spn season 14 #spn 14x19 #jack in the box #mary winchester #jack and mary

[shannara810]

We can all agree on how the SPN finale was bad and Michael going back to Chuck was such a non-sense twist that what the heck did the writers smoke to give birth to such a rubbish? So here is my idea.

Chuck makes Adam go POOF and that's the last straw for Michael: not the ten years in the Cage, not his Father's lies, not his being mass-produced, no. The last straw for our Halo is to lose Adam.

And this makes Michael pissed. Really really pissed. Really really but really pissed. Do you believe that AU!Michael was crazy? Please, Normal!Michael is even worse. No one touches Heaven Viceroy's sassy hubby and lives to tell the tale!

If Dean Winchester can make another reality where his parents are in love-love and he has the perfect hunter family, Michael can go back in time and rally his brothers for a small coup 🤬

The moment when Lucifer finally leaves his Cage after Lilith's death at the end of season 4? Michael is there.

"Hello, Brother".

"Ugh, Daddy's little soldier. Here to finish the job, Michael?"

"Hurry up, Brother. We have a God to kill".

Okay, maybe Lucifer is a little... dumbstruck now. I mean, perfect stick-in-the-ass Michael wants to kill God?! What the fuck did happen while he was away??! However Michael doesn't care much about Luci's opinion: he will have his vengeance.

(BONUS: Mike has little Adam with him. He chose to leave Heaven when Adam was born in the new reality, because any Adam out there will always have a Michael to protect him. Raphael doesn't know what to think about this whole mess, while Gabriel loves the boy 🤣 Adam is the right mix of sassiness and sweet tooth!)

#midam spn #au story #supernatural #archangel michael #adam milligan #spnwhatif #protectivemichael #royalpissedmichael #spn au

[kryptid-writes]

Chapter 14 - A Battle of Fates

When Sam, Dean, and Cas track down Y/N and Lucifer, there is an all-out battle that results in Y/N having to make the ultimate decision. Will she accept her fate and choose Lucifer? Or will she create her own destiny and choose Dean?

(4.4k)

The days with Lucifer fly by. Counting the cycles from day to night, I believe I've been here for about 3 weeks, but it feels like I've spent my whole life with him. Each day holds another exciting adventure that’s designed to keep me happy and busy. He’s created amusement parks, animal sanctuaries, extravagant balls, and fancy dinners, even taking me to my favorite plays and movies, all created out of thin air with the snap of his fingers. 

It’s been incredible. Truly something out of a fairytale. But everywhere we go, it’s just him and me, Lucifer and I, the rest of the world be damned. I’m not dumb, I know he’s doing this to keep me isolated and safe from anyone that may want to steal me away. 

“I have a lot of enemies.” He grabs my shoulders and looks at me in full seriousness. “Many powerful people that will use you to get to me. But I promise you this, I will never let anyone hurt you. Not now. Not ever,” he explains, confirming my suspicions. 

I have no doubt that’s true. What better way to hurt the Devil than threatening the one thing in this world he loves, his Achilles heel, and God help anyone that dares come between us. But, I suspect he has ulterior motives as well, primarily keeping me from the Winchesters and their pocket angel. I can tell that he’s on edge, always glancing at the door, obsessively checking that each sigil is still intact, just waiting for them to burst in guns blazing.

------------------------------------------------------------

The house is secure, located in the middle of nowhere, and sigiled to high Hell. He’s careful. No one knows where we are, not even me. The odds of them ever finding this place are slim to nothing, that is if they’re even looking for me at all. The thought crushes me, feeling as if a little part of me has curled up and died.

I wonder where they are, what they’re doing, which monster they are hunting down this week, but most of all, if they miss me. I know it’s selfish of me to think that way. I put them through Hell, especially Cas, and they’re better off far, far, away from me. 

Nevertheless, I've been practicing the demon exorcism Sam had taught me. I’ve got it down to a T, memorized every word and perfected each pronunciation. I'm ready for any demons that may cross my path. I can just picture the cheery smile on Sam’s face and the way he would squeeze my shoulder to show how proud of me he is.

I’ve even picked up my lessons in Enochian. I doubt Castiel would approve of my methods, but Lucifer has continued where he left off. He was surprised when I asked him, but happy to teach me the basic alphabet and meaning of the simple symbols. I’m still a novice, barely even able to decipher the simplest of writing, but I’m getting better by the day. I dream of seeing Castiel again one day and greeting him in Enochian. The surprised look on his face would be priceless and his kind smile would warm my heart.

Despite the wonderful time I’ve spent with Lucifer, how close we’ve grown, how much I truly adore him now, I miss my family… I miss Dean. The ghost of him lives in my mind. I keep expecting to wake up in the Bunker and see him in the kitchen drinking a beer and going to town on a tower of bacon. I miss his musky cologne and comfy flannels that are way too big for me but feel so right. I miss the way he would hold me at night and whisper that everything will be okay. My heart yearns for him, more than I thought possible. After the way things ended, the big fight that resulted in him storming out, the rage that burned in his eyes, I doubt that he would ever want to see me again. 

“It’s for the best,” I keep reminding myself, trying to quell the feelings that seem to grow stronger with each moment that passes.

Lucifer knows. Despite how hard I try to hide my pain, he’s not oblivious, and the deep connection that we share sure doesn’t help.

“Y/N?” Lucifer asks, hugging me from behind, pulling me to his chest and resting his head on my shoulder like he often does.

“Yes, Luce?” I lean back into his chest.

“Somethings bothering you,” he states matter-of-factly, “talk to me.”

“It’s nothing,” I attempt to ease his suspicion, but it comes out less than convincing.

Uneasy silence hangs in the air as he thinks of what to say.

“Dean could never love you like this, you know.” He gently brushes my hair away from my neck and places a series of soft kisses from my jaw to my shoulder.

I freeze, turning rigid as a board. Hearing those words come from his mouth, it feels like the wind is knocked out of me. “I... I don’t know what you’re talking about Luce,” I laugh nervously, trying to brush off his suspicion. 

“Yes, you do.”

A sinking feeling drops in my stomach, and I close my eyes, preparing myself for where this dangerous conversation may lead. As much as I adore Lucifer, he is anything but predictable.

“A little birdy told me what you and Dean have been up to.” He grits his teeth, trying to control his temper.

“A little birdy being you spying on me?” I bite back defensively.

“Besides the point.” He pulls me in even tighter, perhaps scared that I'll flee at any moment. “I know that you have feelings for that insolent human… I know that you miss him,” he says bitterly, face scrunching up in disdain. “Do you really think he misses you?” He snaps, knowing that it will cut deep.

“Luce…” I whisper, my voice trembling. It’s a thought that’s crossed my mind a million times before, a thought I can’t seem to shake.

“Y/N,” he spins me around to face him, tilting my head up to meet his gaze. His eyes comb over my face like he’s admiring a work of art.

“I’m going to show what it truly means to feel love.” He takes a deep breath. “I promise you that in due time, these feelings you have for that… Winchester,” he says in disgust, “will be a thing of the past. The only person you will crave is me.” He pulls me into a deep and passionate kiss. It’s not angry and possessive like I expected, but rather tender and loving.

I pull away, my lips puffy and cheeks flushed.

“He will never touch you again, do you understand?” He growls, his eyes flash a bright crimson red for a moment, before returning to their usual state. He wraps his magnificent wings around me in a protective manner, the silky feather brushing against my bare arms.

“Yes Luce.” I nod and rest my head against his chest. The sound of his steady heartbeat brings me a sense of peace and safety. Part of me wants to believe him. Part of me wants to forget the feelings I have for Dean Winchester and spend the rest of eternity with the angel fate has decided I’m meant to be with. But the other part of me wants to say, “Fuck fate,” and run into his arms, reuniting with the man I hold so dear. A storm of conflict brews ever stronger inside of me.

------------------------------------------------------------

“I want you to focus, I mean really focus,” Lucifer says, encouraging me.

I hold my hand out in front me, just a few feet away from the fireplace. I can feel the heat licking my palm. I screw my eyes shut and pour all my mental force into the flame that flickers weakly from the charred-up logs. My brows furrow and a bead of sweat runs down my face. I give it my all, but still, nothing comes.

“Ugh! This is useless!” I groan, dropping my hand down by my side in defeat. “Maybe I just don’t have grace abilities like you.” My mood fades from frustration into sadness, wings wilting pathetically.

“You think Rome was built in one day?” He replies sarcastically. “I’ve had millennia to perfect my grace, you just need some more practice.”

I shoot him a dirty look, but eventually nod my head in understanding.

“Now,” he clears his throat and steps closer until his chest is pressed against my back, the tingly feeling returning. “Spread your feet apart.” He kicks my shoes with his boot until they’re about a foot apart in distance, giving me better balance. “Hold your hand out. Stiffen your arm.” He lifts my arm into place, intertwining his fingers in mine and holding my palm forward.

The feeling is comforting, his large hands seem to fit perfectly with mine, the familiar electric feeling pulsing between us.

“Close your eyes,” he calmly instructs.

My eyes flutter closed, this time letting them relax instead of scrunching them up in frustration.

“Take a deep breath and imagine the fire growing clearly in your mind.” He rests his head on my shoulder, grounding me just enough to provide reassurance.

I take a deep breath in through my nose, and out through my mouth, instantly feeling a sense of calm wash over me. I picture the fire burning hot and growing several feet tall, the image in my mind so realistic that it feels like It’s really happening.

There’s a warm tingling sensation that builds in my stomach, growing ever so slightly. My hand shakes as a cold feeling wraps around my core. It’s Lucifer’s grace, a sensation I've grown quite accustomed to. My warm grace tangles with his, dancing in harmony. My grace is much smaller, more submissive to his. His grace is heavier and far more overpowering, like a cold ocean wave that makes my ears ring and blood hum.

“You feel that?” He whispers in my ear, the feeling of our graces merging together pleasantly surges through my body.

“...Yes.” I nod, holding back the groan that threatens to spill from my lips.

“Use it.” He kisses my neck, leaving a playful nip. “I know you can do it.”

His encouragement lights a fire in my stomach, and with renewed determination, I put my full focus into the task at hand.

 The fire roars to life, burning to the top of the fireplace. The flames dance up to the chimney, the smell of crackling wood and thick smoke fills the room. A feeling of power surges through my veins, the rush has me instantly hooked, surely an addiction in the making.

“I did it…” I mutter to myself in shock. “LUCE, I DID IT!” I turn around to face him and my wings flutter in excitement, a happy grin on my face.

“I knew you could, my beloved!” He picks me up with ease and spins me around like I weigh nothing to him. His wings twirl around us, magnificent feathers flowing in the breeze. “I never doubted you for a second.” He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear and stares at me lovingly. “I’m so proud of you.” He places a soft kiss on my lips.

“Mm…” I hum in content, happy that Lucifer, of all people, is proud of me. I melt into the kiss, the rest of the world fading into oblivion. I could stay here forever.

The soft clicks of a lock being picked is covered by the fire that still roars strong behind us and the blood rushing in my ears.

The door bursts open with a loud bang, the splintered wood hanging off the hinges. Light from outside pours into the dimly lit room, illuminating the three figures, their shadows stretching across the floor.

Surprised, I whip my head around to see Dean standing his ground across the room, Sam and Castiel looming behind him, all of them armed with angel blades.

“LET HER GO YOU WINGED BASTARD!” the familiar sound of Dean’s voice booms.  Dean looks pissed, more than I ever could have imagined. This must be what monsters see in their final moments, truthfully, it scares me. His knuckles are white from gripping the blade so hard, ready to spring into action.

“Well, look who’s come to party,” Lucifer teases, holding me closer, surely leaving red marks where his fingers dig into the skin of my arms.

“Dean!” I call out. I never thought I'd see him again and my heart flutters at the sight. They came for me. They actually came for me…

Without giving it a second thought, I break free of Lucifer's grasp and make a beeline towards the Winchesters and their beloved angel, awaiting the feeling of being in their arms once again.

Before I even make it halfway across the room, Lucifer appears in front of me. I bump into his chest, stumbling back onto the floor.

“Tsk, tsk, tsk,” He shakes his head, giving me a disapproving look and picks me up, throwing me over his shoulder like I'm just a child. 

“PUT!... ME!... DOWN!” I demand, pounding my fists against his back. When this has absolutely no effect on him, I run my hands into his feathers and twist, remembering the reactions it elicited from him before. He growls, but refuses to let me down, his grips only growing tighter on me.

“Put the girl down, brother,” Castiel warns, a dangerous edge to his voice.

“Castiel, pleasure to see you again, come back for seconds?” He taunts him with a grin.

Dean takes a step forward, practically fuming.

“Stay!” Lucifer commands me, placing me on the ground behind him. He splays his wings out protectively in front of me, as if I'm the one at risk.

The tension in the room is so thick that you could cut it with a butter knife.

The sound of every window breaking around us, practically makes me jump out of my skin. Shards of glass fly in all directions, one piece just barely missing my face by half an inch. The sky that had been clear just moments ago, is now raining like we’re in the eye of a category five hurricane. Booming claps of thunder fill the room, followed by strikes of lightning that illuminate Lucifer’s wings in the most intimidating way. 

Snapping out of my shocked daze, I completely disregard his command and try to run forward but find that his grace is holding me in place, essentially super gluing my shoes to the floor.

For just a moment, the three boys give each other a knowing look before they all swing into action.

Dean lunges forward, swinging the blade with full force. He aims for Lucifer’s head, but he flawlessly dodges the attack, his eyes flashing red in anger. But this doesn’t deter him, Dean’s unrelenting, like he’s been waiting for this moment his entire life.

Sam keeps himself fixed to the closest wall across the room. He drags the blade across his hand, creating a deep gash in his palm. Blood drips to the floor in abundance, creating a crimson puddle. He dips his finger in the liquid and quickly begins to draw a symbol on the wall with haste. I’ve studied enough to recognize that it’s an Enochian symbol, but I can’t decipher what it means.

Castiel stands a few feet behind Dean, his brow furrowed in concentration. He extends his arm towards Lucifer and his eyes glow a light blue. He chants quietly under his breath, his voice low and steady.

Dean continues his attack on Lucifer. With one precise swing, he slices Lucifer across the face. A cut on his cheekbone forms, blood dribbling from his cheek to his chin. Dean flashes him a cocky smile.

I struggle against his hold with all my strength, desperately trying to pry my shoes from the hardwood floor, but it's ultimately useless. I have no choice but to stand by in horror, watching the scene unfold in front of me with no way to stop it. The only thing worse than being in love with two men, is watching them kill each other right in front of your eyes.

Lucifer reaches up to his cheek, tenderly touching the wound that instantly heals shut with a white shine. He lowers his hand, looking at the blood that coats his fingers in anger.

“You’re gonna regret that,” he growls, lunging at Dean.

“I don't think so brother,” Castiel states, his eyes glowing a bright blue. With the power of his grace, he stops Lucifer in his tracks, forcing him on his knees and keeping him stuck in place.

Dean tilts his head, giving him a look that says, “I win.”

“Hurry Dean, I can’t hold him much longer,” Castiel groans, his body straining to fight off Lucifer’s powerful resistance.

Without a second of hesitation, Dean plunges the blade into Lucifer, his body visibly shaking with adrenaline.

“NO!” I scream out, my wings frilled in panic. With the attack, Lucifer's grip on me breaks and I rush to his side in an instant. I kneel next to him on the ground, lifting his limp head in my hands, his eyes closed and blood dripping from the wound where the angel blade remains buried deep in his flesh. I can feel the hot tears pricking my eyes.

Silence hangs in the air. Dean, Sam, and Cas anxiously waiting to see if they’re plan had really worked. After a few moments pass, they give each other a look of relief and collect themselves.

Their relief is short lived, as he opens his eyes and breaks out of Cas’s hold, more pissed than ever.

“You missed.” He smiles and pulls the blade out from the right side of his chest, dropping it to the ground with a clank, blood splattering the wood. Within seconds the wound is healed shut with a white glow. He stands from his knees and spreads his wings, towering far above the rest of us. “You should really aim for the heart next time.” He grins wide like a Cheshire cat.

All three boys exchange a look that practically screams, “Oh shit.”

With a flick of his wrist, Lucifer throws the three of them against the wall, pinning them in place. They struggle with all their might, but their efforts are essentially useless against his powerful grace. In a fight, archangel always wins.

“Sit, stay awhile.” he teases.

“Lucifer, no,” I beg, just wanting this nightmare to be over.

He wraps his arm around my waist but pays me no mind. He twists his hand into a fist and at once, both of the brothers’ writhe in pain, their body contorting in unnatural angles. 

Dean and Sam groan, their faces twisting up in agony. As if it couldn’t get worse, they start to spit up blood. And not just a little, but a disturbing amount of blood pouring through their lips, staining their skin and clothes a blooming red. The sound of groans and coughing makes me sick to my stomach.

“Lucifer, stop!” I yell in horror. I bunch my hands up in his shirt, desperately trying to snap him out of his fit of rage. I’ve never seen him like this before, but I start to question if those stories about him are actually as true as they say.

“No!” Castiel yells in his gravelly voice, staring at the beloved Winchester brothers squirming next to him.

“Wait your turn, brother.” Lucifer snaps his head in his direction and shifts his hand towards Castiel. A white glow slowly burns inside Cas. It starts low in his chest but builds until the white light shines through his throat and eyes with a deafening ring that continues to grow.

“You really think she loves you? I mean, you?” Lucifer mocks, staring Dean down intently.

Dean tries to speak, but his words are undecipherable through the spluttering blood and groans.

“STOP!!” I pound my fists against Lucifer’s chest so hard that it would surely leave painful bruises on any normal human. But he’s not human, no, he’s the farthest thing from it, an archangel in a savage rage.

He continues his assault, the boy’s looking as if they’re on the brink of death, perhaps they are.

“You promised…” my voice breaks.

This pulls him out of his trance. He stops his brutal attack and turns to me, looking guilty and the slightest bit pained.

“You’re right,” he admits, getting his temper under control. He takes my hand in his and brings them to rest on his cheek, evening out his breath.

The Winchesters gawk at him, as if they can’t believe what they’re seeing. They cough and choke, but the waterfall of blood stops and Castiel ceases the blinding glow.

“You’re scaring me, Luce.” I step closer, my eyes wet with tears.

“Forgive me, love.” he looks at me with loving eyes, the man I love coming back to me, even if it’s just for a moment. He pulls me into a kiss. It’s soft at first, caring and apologetic, but it soon turns deep and possessive. He wraps his wings around me and looks over to Dean, holding eye contact, needing to see his jealous reaction.

“Leave her alone,” he demands in a hoarse voice, his face burning with anger.

I break the kiss with a light shove and look at him, my cheeks burning in shame. I can practically hear his heart breaking into a thousand shards.

“Or what?” Lucifer snaps, “What did you think was going to happen, hm? You’d just storm in here, kill me, and she’d come running back to you like some lovesick puppy?”

Dean musters up the strength to shoot him a look that could kill, but I could see Lucifer’s words were gutting him inside.

“Newsflash kid, Y/N’s my soulmate. We’re meant to be together, it’s our destiny,” he says, pulling me so close that my wings are pressed flat against his chest, wrapping an arm around me to secure my body in place.

Dean’s face becomes somber as he processes the information. I can see the internal debate going on inside of his head, one that I’ve had many times before. 

“Is that true, Y/N?” Sam asks hesitantly.

Cas gives Sam a knowing look.

“Yeah, tell them Y/N.” Lucifer takes my chin between his fingers and forces me to look them in the eyes, unable to escape their awaiting glares, “Is it true?” He mocks.

“...Yes,” I admit, barely a whisper.

Dean’s eyes go wide, tears threatening to spill at any moment. His green irises flick back and forth, desperately scanning my face for any sign that I might be lying, that this is all some part of a masterplan to deceive Lucifer, but finds none.

“I’m sorry,” my voice cracks and I close my eyes in shame, tears streaming down my cheeks. I can feel Lucifer smirking behind me, clearly amused with this turn of events.

The room is quiet for a moment before something in Dean changes. His eyes harden and he lifts his head with a wave of confidence. “Yeah? Well, I say screw destiny. You can shove it up your feathery ass!” He spits in defiance.

“Give it up Dean.” Lucifer rolls his eyes dramatically, “She’s my mate, you can't have her!” He growls, his wings spreading to their full wingspan.

“Lucifer… that’s enough!” I warn, grabbing him by the shoulders, trying to get his attention, but he keeps his eyes glued on Dean.

“No, she’s not! She’s one of us now, she’s a Winchester!” He snaps back.

Hearing those words makes my heart flutter but it sends Lucifer over the edge. His eyes glow a red so bright that I’m sure the color will be burned in the back of my retina for days to come. He balls his hand into a fist and twists it sharply. 

Dean screams as the unmistakable sound of his rib bones crunching and breaking under the angel's grace bounces off the walls, followed by a series of pained whimpers, drowned out by Sam and Cas’s protests. 

“I SAID, ENOUGH!” my voice echoes around the room. With a sudden surge of grace, Lucifer is shoved halfway across the room. Dean, Sam, and Cas are released from his hold, falling to the floor. The storm stops and all is quiet for just a moment.

Dean clutches at his ribs and attempts to stand, but collapses onto the ground in immense pain. Sam and Cas rush to his side and help him to his feet, throwing his arms around each of their shoulders to help him stand. The three of them look at me in shock, Dean seemingly more amazed than the others.

Lucifer, on the other hand, is beaming, clearly impressed with my sudden surge in power. “Look at y-” Lucifer starts with a cocky smile.

“Shut up!” I interrupt him, shooting him a warning look.

“I’m tired of everyone treating me like I’m some prize to be won!” I yell, angrily looking between the two of them, disgusted with the little show they put on tonight. I try to catch my breath as I collect my thoughts.

“I’m my own person, and I decide my destiny! Not you,” I turn to look at Luce, images of our amazing dates together play like a movie in my mind, how he makes me feel like I'm the only girl in the world, the only thing that matters to him, and the powerful connection pulling us together like magnets. I can just imagine spending eternity with him, exploring where my powers could take me, seeing how deep our connection goes, and what the next millennia together has in store for us.

“Not you,” I look at Dean. Memories of my nights with him flood back, the way he was always there when I needed him, the way he makes my heart flutter every time I look at him, the way I crave him in every sense of the word. It’s no use denying the feelings I have for Dean, and what I wouldn’t give to spend the rest of my days with him, watching him grow old and showing him what it really means to be loved.

“And definitely not fate.” I raise my head high and frill my wings out to their full extent, refusing to hold myself back any longer.

“It’s my choice, and I choose…”

Series Masterlist

Full Masterlist

Tags: @roseblue373 @iprobablyshipit91

#dean winchester x reader #dean x reader #dean winchester #lucifer supernatural #lucifer x reader supernatural #lucifer #lucifer x reader #supernatural fanfic #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural reader insert #reader inse #supernatural #slow burn #love triangle

[whims-of-a-star]

Suit

It catches Sam’s eyes as they’re walking through the small town. Dean is forced to stop when Sam does, gaze trained on something.

“Sammy? What’s—“ Dean inhales sharply as his eyes trail to where Sam’s focus is.

It’s a white suit, displayed through glass on a male mannequin.

SamLucifer stood there, wearing a white suit and holding a plucked rose in his fingers.

“Since when did you get an interest in clothes? Are you tapping into your feminine side?” Dean asks jokingly, but his tone wavers slightly in nervousness.

“Hello, Dean,” Lucifer greeted with a stolen quirked smile.

Sam gives him a bitch face before replying, “I was just looking.” He pauses, turning back to the suit. “But maybe I could pull it off…”

“Nope! Nope, white isn’t your colour.” Dean hurriedly yanks Sam’s wrist and drags him away.

They walk in silence after that, and Dean can’t help but play Lucifer’s words over and over in his head.

"No matter what you do, no matter what choices you make, what details you alter, we will always end up…here."

“Not ever, asshole.” Dean growls under his breath.

“You really hate white that much, Dean?” Sam asks with an amused smile.

“No, no. It’s just…” Dean trails off and realizes he’s still holding tightly to Sam’s wrist, quickly letting go with a slightly embarrassed flush over his cheeks.

“Just?”

“Just nothing. Are we finding this shifter or what?” he snaps, walking ahead of his brother, who snorts behind him.

“Sure. Whatever you say.”

Sam looks great in white, but the sight of the Devil being present with the suit on has burned all prospects of Dean ever letting his little brother wear white. Not that Dean will ever tell Sam that.

#drabbles #gencest #sam and dean #season 5 spoilers #post 5.04 #i think there was a post talking about this concept #hence why I wrote this lol

[notinthislife50]

Chapter 42

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You turned and faced Dean, who was snoring lightly, and smiled at him. Unable to sleep, you slowly made your way out of the bed grabbing a throw as you left.

You made your way to the porch and sat on the step watching the moon's reflection on the still water.

You heard someone clear their throat behind you. and saw Sam smiling unsurely at you. You patted the place beside you and when he sat down you offered him part of the blanket.

You both sat in silence for a while, not knowing what to say.

You whispered. “I’m here, Sam. Whenever you’re ready to talk.”

He nodded, a distant look in his eyes as he began to recount his experiences. “It was like nothing I’ve ever imagined. Hell was… indescribable. Lucifer tormented me in ways that I can’t even put into words. He wanted to break me, to shatter my spirit.”

You reached out and placed her hand over Sam’s, offering a reassuring squeeze. “I can’t even begin to imagine what you went through.”

Sam managed a faint smile, appreciating your support. “Thanks, Y/N. There were times when I thought I wouldn’t make it, when I thought I’d be trapped there forever. we… we fought. Over and over. It was brutal, like a never-ending cycle of pain and rage.”

Your eyes widened as she tried to comprehend the sheer magnitude of the struggle Sam had faced. “And Castiel? How did he pull you out?”

“Cas… I am not to sure but, he found a way to reach me,” Sam explained. “He used everything to rescue me from that nightmare. When I woke up, I was back in the real world.”

Tears welled up in your eyes, a mixture of empathy and sorrow for everything Sam had gone through. “Sam, I’m so sorry.”

Sam shook his head, his gaze firm. “Don’t be sorry, Y/N. I’m not telling you this for pity. I just… I need you to know that there are things I can’t talk about. Things that I can’t even bring myself to say out loud.”

She nodded, understanding the weight of his unspoken words. “I get it, Sam. Some wounds are too deep to share right away. Take all the time you need.”

He managed a small smile, a glimmer of gratitude in his eyes. “Thanks, Y/N. You’ve always been like a sister to me.”

You leaned in, wrapping your arms around Sam in a warm embrace. “And you’ll always be my brother, Sam. No matter what you’ve been through, no matter what you can or can’t say. I love you.”

Sam held onto you tightly, a mix of emotions swirling within him. he felt a sense of belonging and acceptance that he hadn’t felt in a while. As they held onto each other, the memories of hell seemed to fade just a little, replaced by a sense of comfort that he was back with his family.

@deansgirl79 @suckitands33 @deans-baby-momma @dragony937 @linzerrr @deans-spinster-witch @foxyjwls007 @djs8891 @my-obsession-spn @mikaylalala13 @jackles010378 @spnbaby-67

#supernatural fanfic #supernatural x reader #supernatural fic #dean winchester supernatural #supernatural #supernatural fanfic series #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural imagine #supernatural reader insert #supernatural smut #supernatural/reader #dean supernatural #dean smut #dean winchester #dean winchester fanfic #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester fic #dean winchester fluff #dean winchester imagine #dean winchester smut #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x you #dean x reader #dean fluff #dean x reader smut #dean x y/n #dean x you

[dotthings]

Here's my post about Dean and the hunting life and unreliable narrators to pair with my Sam post.

In S4 while a demon manipulates Sam, angels are manipulating Dean. In 4.17 It’s a Terrible Life (written by Sera Gamble), after a despairing Dean confesses to Cas at the end of 4.16 On the Head of a Pin that he can’t do what the angels want, he’s not strong enough, Zachariah tries to nudge Dean to play his role by plunking him and Sam into a corporate boredom life Dean doesn’t want, and then tries to shame him into playing the role Zachariah wants him to play.

ZACHARIAH But after the unfortunate situation with Uriel, I felt it necessary to pay a visit. Get my ducks in a row. DEAN I am not one of your ducks. ZACHARIAH Starting with your attitude. DEAN Oh, so, what? This was all some sort of a lesson? Is that what you're telling me? Wow. Very creative. ZACHARIAH You should see my decoupage. DEAN Gross. No thank you. So, what? I'm just hallucinating all this? Is that it? ZACHARIAH Not at all. Real place, real haunting. Just plunked you in the middle without the benefit of your memories. DEAN Just to shake things up? Hm? So you guys can have fun watching us run around like ass clowns in monkey suits? ZACHARIAH To prove to you that the path you're on is truly in your blood. You're a hunter. Not because your dad made you, not because God called you back from hell, but because it is what you are. And you love it. You'll find your way to it in the dark every single time and you're miserable without it. Dean, let's be real here. You're good at this. You'll be successful. You will stop it. DEAN Stop what? The apocalypse, huh? Lucifer? What? Be specific, man. ZACHARIAH You'll do everything you're destined to do. All of it. But I know, I know. You're not strong enough. You're scared. You got daddy issues. You can't do it. Right? DEAN Angel or not, I will stab you in your face. ZACHARIAH All I'm saying is it's how you look at it. Most folks live and die without moving anything more than the dirt it takes to bury them. You get to change things. DEAN turns away. ZACHARIAH Save people, maybe even the world. All the while you drive a classic car and fornicate with women. This isn't a curse. It's a gift. So for God's sakes, Dean, quit whining about it. Look around. There are plenty of fates worse than yours. So are you with me? You wanna go steam yourself another latte? Or are you ready to stand up and be who you really are?

“This isn’t a curse. It’s a gift.” Notice Zachariah trying to glamorize hunting at Dean when it’s canonically traumatizing, dangerous, and often miserable, and telling Dean to “quit whining” and suck it up because there are people worse off, while Zachariah reduces Dean’s entire personality to nothing but the hunt, referencing perks that are a simplistic take on who Dean is—the facade not the whole person. There's something not right here.

Zachariah also isn't entirely incorrect. Dean does love hunting and he does always find his way back to it and Dean’s good at it, and they get to save people. The manipulative villains in SPN often use a core thread of truth and then twist it.

But much as it’s true about Dean’s affinity for hunting, Dean’s questioning of hunting, his conflicted feelings, his love and resentment for it, the brutality of that life that SPN self-evidently shows us, has been a long-running theme in every era of SPN. Dean yearns for and thinks about things beyond just hunting. Which doesn't include working as a suit. Zachariah picks that to push Dean towards hunting, it's not meant as an exploration of Dean's deep wants and needs beyond the hunt.

Dean would never be content leaving hunting for good, but he does have an ongoing love/hate relationship with it, and it’s not all he is.

He’s more than just the hunt and the kill. Deep down Dean has known that all along, but fears that’s all he is. Zachariah was wrong. For Dean, hunting is a curse AND a gift and it never has been all gift or all curse for him.

#Dean Winchester #Dean meta

[gabriels-wings-of-freedom]

Ok I got another Request for Crowley if you’re up for it!! 👀

Could be seen as a kinda continuation of the other thing if you like! Theres kinda ✨something✨ in the air they haven’t dared to act upon cause he doesn’t really wanna realize that he has the feels while Reader thinks it’s impossible that someone like him or anyone cool for that matter would fall for her BUT THEN she has to sell her soul to him to get information on the apocalyptic horsemen but he promises to give it back and 👀 she confesses that thats gonna be her first kiss and rest is up to you!!

Sure! Always happy to write for Crowley XD Hope you enjoy!💖 and yes, I’ll hint at the other story, and sorry if the ending is kind of bleh XD

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When The Dealing’s Done

In Crowley’s mind, things couldn’t be more complicated when it comes to his feelings for you. However, a deal in the air changes everything.

Crowley loved being a demon for one reason, and it totally contradicts this statement.

He can’t love.

After being rejected and repulsed all throughout his human life by his mother, by his son, and by so many others, he thought that being a demon would be an improvement. No feelings to worry about. However, nothing ever goes right for Crowley. Ever since he willingly hugged you that one time, he’s been feeling something.

He knows what it is too, but he will not admit it.

Crowley doesn’t pay attention to his feelings. He can’t. He can’t come to the realization that he might actually care for you because he knows, that in end, it would destroy him. He’s been through too much hell, literally, to let that happen. Yet, his scorned heart was telling him another thing. But Crowley wouldn’t dare act upon it.

And neither would you.

The demon wasn’t the only one feeling things. You yourself were struggling with your emotions. You knew your brothers would kill Crowley or you if they ever found out how you felt about him. However, you weren’t going to do anything about it those feelings. And it was mostly for one reason.

You didn’t think it was possible.

Why would someone as powerful as Crowley look at you in such a manner? Why waste the time? Why would anyone waste the time? For your entire life you’ve never had someone look at you like you were the only thing that mattered. Of course, Sam and Dean did, and they were partially the reason that no guy has ever stayed in your life. But it was also hard for you to realize that someone would fall for you like that. However, you would have to push some domestic worries out of your mind. You guys had bigger problems here.

An apocalypse on the rise. The four horsemen. Locking Lucifer back up.

You didn’t want anyone else taking risks here besides you. Sam and Dean took risks every day, so why not you? You guys needed to find the horsemen, get the rings, and there was one sure fire way you knew of to do so, even if it frightened you.

Crowley.

“So let me get this straight...your soul, for information on the four apocalyptic horsemen?” Crowley asked you as the two of you stood in Bobby’s large garage. You snuck out without anyone’s knowledge to summon the demon. There wasn’t even a devil’s trap for him, something that sort of surprised him.

You nodded and Crowley looked taken aback.

“Why?” He asked, wondering why such a person like yourself would do something so drastic. You fiddled with your hands but told him everything regardless.

“We were told that we needed the four rings of the four horsemen to make this key-” You started to explain but he interrupted you.

“Yeah, I get all that. But selling your soul? Surely there are better ways.” Crowley said. Truthfully, taking a soul from the Winchesters should be something that the demon should take pride in. However, not when that soul belongs to you. He then quickly came to a conclusion.

“Fine. But aren’t you scared?” He had to ask, even though he was going to promise to give it back after the dealing’s done. You slowly nodded and Crowley, though he couldn’t help it, felt a twinge of sympathy.

“Don’t be...I promise to give your soul back. You aren’t going to lose it on this deal. Cross my non-existent heart.” Crowley said softly before smirking and making a cross over his heart with his finger. You giggled a bit, but you both knew what was coming next when it comes to a demon deal.

That kiss to seal it.

“Something else seems to be on your mind, darling?” Crowley’s accented and gruff voice cut through your thoughts. Your cheeks reddened as you heard him speak, reminding you of the situation at hand. However, he was on to you now, and you had to be honest. So, you took a deep breath.

“This will be my first kiss...” You confessed quietly. It felt like forever before the shocked demon could finally speak.

“Ever?” He had to ask in disbelief with wide eyes. You nodded.

“Ever.” You confirmed for him, face getting red from embarrassment. Crowley nodded to that before giving a chuckle of disbelief, putting his hands in his pockets.

“I find it hard to believe that a girl like you has never been kissed before, Y/N.” The way he said that, so honest and so soft, was something you never expected from Crowley. It made your insides turn to mush, and you pushed the idea of him actually preferring to kiss you to the back of your mind.

“Why would that be?” You asked him with a faint blush. Now it was Crowley’s turn to be flustered. He wasn’t ready to reach this point with you, where feelings were involved. He tried to keep telling himself that this was all just a deal and he’s done it hundreds of times, but his heart was working faster than his brain.

“Because you, Y/N, are one of the most incredible women that this demon has ever come across. And I would honored to give you the greatest first kiss of a lifetime.” He said with a slight smugness in his voice when it came to end of his statement. As he spoke, Crowley took a couple steps closer to you. It made your heart speed up, but not out of fear.

Taking you silence as a yes, he gently cupped your cheek. However, you grabbed his hand to stop him.

“Wait a moment, this is extremely important to me, so I want you to be honest...Do you have feelings for me, Crowley? Were you aware of mine for you?” You asked him, face blushing immensely. Crowley wasn’t ready to go there. In truth, he was afraid to answer. But perhaps this is the first point in his life when things will go his way. This was his chance.

And Crowley told you the truth, nothing but the truth as he gently stroked your cheek.

“Yes...I am so in love with you.” He confessed with that quiet and ragged tone of his. Then you felt the gentle press of his lips against yours. Crowley was right. This was the greatest first kiss of your life. You were glad that fate had you wait for him.

But you knew this was something your brothers wouldn’t approve of.

“I’m going to have to tell them, aren’t I?” You asked Crowley after the kiss, after the deal was done. He was holding you closely in his arms, gently stroking your back.

“No dear, you don’t.” He said and you looked up at him in shock.

“Crowley, it’s Sam and Dean. They are going to find out. I can’t lie.” You told him and you hear him chuckle a bit.

“I never said to lie, Y/N.” Gently, Crowley pulled you away so you could better look in his eyes. Better to see that smirk he held on his face when it came to discussing your brothers.

“Just do what I do when it comes to Moose and Squirrel. Tell them the truth, but not all of the truth.” He said to you and you slowly nodded. The ‘dealing with a demon’ they would need to know about, but they didn’t need to know about it in depth.

About how you and Crowley mean more to each other than some simple soul.

#supernatural #supernatural imagine #crowley #crowley x reader #crowley imagine

[apocalypseornaw]

Love is a Fight

Set in my Always be Yours verse (and now I REALLY want to write more in it but anyways...) set during season 11 when Dean is fighting his connection to Amara and

Warnings: Cursing, mentions of steamy times, self depreciation, Amara kinda being perv-ish

“Will you please just talk to me sweetheart?” The slight break in Dean’s voice was almost enough to make you crack, almost enough to make you forget your anger and insecurities. “What is there to talk about Dean? Your greatest want is Amara, not me. You’re connected to her on some deep level. I can not compete with that” you stood at the door of your shared room with your arms crossed over your chest while he stood in the middle of the room facing you.

The small distance separating you might as well have been miles. “Y/N, you know I love you. Hell when I was a demon I was quicker to try to hurt Sam than you! Every time the mark flared up you were able to help me soothe it. I don’t give a damn about whatever connection might be there between me and Amara. I am in love with you!”

You shook your head “I can’t. I know you love me, I really do but in the end you’re going to choose her. I can feel it and I…I am not strong enough to face that. I sound so damn weak and pathetic but I love you so damn much Dean. I never thought I’d fall like this but here we are” you shrugged weakly feeling tears begin to sting your eyes as they fought their way out. He took a tentative step towards you stopping the moment you took a step back which caused your back to bump into the door. The look in his eyes broke your heart when he asked “So, this is it? Your plan is to what, just pack a bag and climb into your jeep? Act like we never happened?”

“I don’t want to walk away from you Dean, I don’t want to walk away from this but I don’t feel like there’s anything left worth fighting for. Amara is older than time itself, she’s more powerful than anything we have ever faced! Lucifer, Micheal hell god himself chose to lock her away because she was that strong willed. I’ve stood by your side and by Sam’s through multiple end of the worlds, a couple deaths and more pain than most humans could ever know and haven’t blinked an eye. You two are my family but I don’t know how to fight this time” you felt the first few tears slip down your face and that was what caused Dean to cross the space between you. 

He didn’t know how to fix this. He pulled you into his chest, half expecting you to struggle against his embrace but instead you sagged against him crying in earnest as he tried his best to soothe you. “Baby, please tell me how I make you believe that there is nothing or no one I would choose over you” he whispered and when your finally raised your eyes to look at him he felt his heart shatter at how broken you looked “I don’t know” you admitted before crashing your lips against his taking you both by surprise. 

He tried to pour everything he felt for you into the kiss, hoping just maybe he could physically make you see what he felt where his words fell short. You moaned into his mouth rolling your tongue against his when your hands found the hair at the nape of his neck tangling themselves into it. 

When you broke away from his lips for air he moved down your neck sucking and biting every spot he knew would pull a reaction from you. When he nudged the side of your neck asking for access to your pulse point you turned your head just enough he could nip at the spot causing your grip on him to tighten “Dean” you tried weakly before finally managing to get out “S-Stop” he froze looking down at you with wide eyes, chest heaving. “What’s wrong? Did I do something wrong?” You shook your head “No, no you didn’t do anything wrong”

He nodded, “Then why’d you tell me to stop?” you took a deep breath “I want you Dean but is this a kiss me goodbye type of thing?” “No, never sweetheart. You could walk out that door right now and that won’t change the fact that you are the only woman I will ever love. I do not want Amara. I want you more than anything and if you don’t want me to kiss you just say so but if you give me the ok I want nothing more than to show you just how much I love you” “Then kiss me again” you whispered with a small smile.

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Dean rolled his hips up against yours stroking that spot deep inside of you. You buried your face into the side of his neck nearly sobbing with pleasure. He was sitting against the headboard with you in his lap and your arms wrapped around each other.

He wanted to have you as close as humanly possible. He needed to feel every twitch, hear every gasp. He had to know you were still here, still his. He needed to hold you close to him when he came, for you to know that you were the only thing he wanted. He wanted you to feel his heartbeat under your fingertips and for you to know just what you did to him. “I love you” he spoke as he pulled you tighter against him, mouth finding yours in a sloppy kiss.

When you broke away you smiled at him almost drunkenly “I love you Dean” his lips found your jaw then down your neck leaving open mouthed kisses on any flesh he could find.  

He could feel you clench around him and knew you were close. He kept his pace the same using his left hand to slip between your bodies. When his fingers found your clit your eyes closed tightly, his name falling from your lips like a prayer. Just as you came, clinging tightly to him he spotted something out the corner of his eye. There in the corner of the room it looked like Amara.

He shook his head trying to clear his vision but she remained watching. He knew the moment you felt his hips stutter. Your eyes flew open and followed his line of vision. Of course you didn’t see anything there. “Dean?” you asked, voice still shaking from your orgasm. “It’s nothing sweetheart” he tried but you shook your head “You stopped. Why did you stop?”

He tried to kiss you, to pull you back against him but you shoved his chest giving as much space between the two of you as possible considering he was still inside of you. “What did you see Dean?” you stared him in the eyes. “Nothing” the moment the realization hit you he knew. So many emotions flashed through your eyes from anger to pain then finally settling on disgust.

Tears flooded your eyes as you scrambled off of him, blindly grabbing the sheet from the floor where it had been discarded. “Y/N” he tried to grab you but when you nearly fell trying to get away from him he backed off.  “Don’t fucking touch me Dean” he held both hands up to show you he wasn’t going to. 

He watched as you grabbed what clothes you could before heading for the door “Where are you going?” he asked and barely caught your response of “I’m showering then I’m leaving for a while”

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Sam heard the slam of a door and that drew him from his room. He hadn’t expected to see you sobbing in the hallway wearing nothing but a sheet wrapped around and holding an armload of clothes “Y/N?” he asked gently, trying not to spook you.

You glanced up and the moment you saw him a fresh wave of tears took over “Sam, I gotta leave” “What happened?” he questioned. He knew you’d been having some issues about the whole Amara thing but from the sounds that had been coming from yours and Dean's room before he went to his own, cranking the television up to drown it out, he had assumed the two of you were working over it. “He saw her Sam. Rather it was her reaching out with a vision or him imagining her. He saw her while he was fucking me” no wonder you were breaking down.

“Just calm down. If he saw her I’m sure it was her doings, not his” you nodded before laughing humorlessly “Doesn’t change how fucking disgusting I feel. I gotta shower. I gotta try to scrape this off. I..fuck Sam I can’t”

You pushed past him, running into the bathroom and slamming the door behind yourself. He stood in the hall looking from the bathroom door to the bedroom door. Should he try to talk to Dean? Should he let you two work it out? While he was trying to decide, the bedroom door opened and Dean stormed out, clad in nothing but sweatpants “Where’d she go Sammy?”

He pointed towards the bathroom “She’s not doing too good Dean” the expression in his brother’s eyes made Sam’s heart hurt “Sam, you know that wasn’t me choosing to see Amara. No one compares to Y/N where I’m concerned” “I know that Dean but doesn’t help her heart” Dean ran a hand over his face looking so defeated “What do I do?” Sam shrugged because for once he had no idea. 

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You weren’t sure how long you’d been in the shower. The hot water ran out long before you peeled yourself off the floor to turn it off. Dean had come to the door, begging you to talk to him. You hadn’t responded, so he sent Sam who simply asked if you were ok considering how long you’d been in there. You’d told Sam you were still breathing and left it at that. 

You stood, staring at yourself in the mirror. You’d scrubbed your skin to the point it was a pinkish color in most places. You were heartbroken, and angry. Why Dean? Why out of every man in existence it had to be the man you loved that the darkness was connected to. Your love had tarnished the effects of the mark, why couldn’t it compete against Amara? You wanted to leave the bunker but honestly you were afraid that she may get her hands on you and if you were being honest that was one fight you didn't know if you’d survive. 

You stared at the door unsure what to do. You could climb into the jeep and drive. There were plenty of Bobby’s old cabins you could crash at. You knew damn near every ward in existence. You could protect yourself in that way. You just weren’t sure if you could truly bring yourself to leave the bunker and your life that you’d built behind. 

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