#this is the closest i've ever gotten to writing smut
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PROPOSALS - 95ers
how the 95 liners would propose (fem!reader)
warnings: brief mention of past sex, use of y/n (once), mainly female centric compliments, but can be read with gender neutral reader in mind.
a/n: first attempt at writing fluff,,, why is it so much harder to write than smut ??
seungcheol:
traditional man. takes you to an expensive restaurant, and buys you the best wine you've ever tasted. your friends and family are scattered secretly around the nearby tables, ready to witness / capture the beautiful moment.
today was a very special day. yours and seungcheol's five year anniversary. the fact you had been with him for only five years shocks you, as you can't remember your life before him.
he had been able to get a week off from his crazy schedule, which resulted in the two of you hoping on a plane to head to Paris.
tonight, the night of your anniversary, cheol had purchased a particular dress for you to wear, one that compliments his outfit will, and took you to one of the top rated restaurants near your hotel.
the night started out as it usually would, nothing out of the ordinary. you hadn't gotten tipsy, but the wine had given you a fuzzy feeling in your head, making you much more giggly, to your lovers pleasure.
around about an hour had passed, the two of you now sharing a slice of chocolate cake. seungcheol was staring at you the way he always does, eyes full of nothing but love and admiration. the had been a break in the conversation, cheol and you simply bathing in each others presence.
you take a quick glance around the room, until a noise draws your attention back to your soulmate.
he was now standing, spoon and glass in hand, smirking at you.
"sorry to interrupt everyones lovely dinner, but i have a very special announcement to make." he placed the items down, before turning to address the other patrons.
"today is me and my gorgeous girlfriends five year anniversary !"
the room had erupted into applause.
"but thats not the announcement i wanted to make."
he turns back to you, chuckling slightly at your confused face. god, could you get any cuter ?
"y/n. my darling. my love. five years have passed since i've been able to call you mine. five years of my life spent holding you in my arms. i never want that to end."
he drops on one knee, chuckling at the gasp you let out. he pulls the ring out, and as he does, the first tear rolls down your cheek.
"will you do me the honor, and spent the rest of your life in my arms ?" he is peering up at you, a look of confidence that you know he is using to mask his nerves.
you immediately hop to the ground with him, nodding silently while you sob. the flash of cameras all around you, as well as many cheers of congradulations.
as the two of you stand, you see you are surrounded by your closest loved ones. what a perfect way to end a perfect night.
jeonghan:
private beach at sunset. proposes in a gazebo while you look over at the sea. no doubt in my mind he writes "marry me" in the sand. chuckles at your tears even though he definitely is ugly crying too. has a picnic prepared afterwards.
one thing about you and jeonghan's relationship; you were homebodies. the two of you rarely felt the need to go out and about to feel a connection, majority of the time choosing to stay huddle up and nap together.
today, however, was one of those rare dares where hannie would drag you out of bed for a date. although you tried your hardest to convince him to just do what you usually do for dates (read: sleep.), here you were, in a flowery sundress, walking towards yours and jeonghan's "secret" spot.
the spot in question was a little opening on the beach, far away enough for what most people consider to be a walk. the two of you had found it early on in your relationship, and tested it's level of privacy with some good ol' sex.
you could tell something was off with him today. he seemed... cautious ? hannie ? cautious ? yeah right. he was extra fidgety, and kept checking his appearance before your trek. he was rushing to leave the house too.
turning the corner to find the place the two of you were very familiar with, there was so many unfamiliar things catching your eye. fairy lights had been scattered around, dangling down from the roof of the gazebo. candles had been placed neatly around the edges. a picnic blanket had been laid down on the floor, with a bouquet of flowers resting atop it.
you turned around, ready to ask jeonghan what was going on, when you spotted him on one knee, a nervous smile on his lips as he gazed up at you. you gasped, knees buckling, and jeonghan instinctively held his hand out to ground you.
he giggled at your shocked face. "hey love"
"han i swear to god-" your words were cut off by a sob, your breath hitching.
"'ts okay love. don't cry." his hand holding yours began to rub back and forth on the back of your palm.
"knowing you, being with you, loving you. it has been a dream come true for me. i never thought i would be able to experience the love people craved. i was okay with that thought. until i met you. i want to be with you for the rest of my days... i want to grow old with you. will you let me ?"
without saying anything, you jumped into his arms, sobbing into his shoulder while nodding. you could feel his own tears beginning to hit your skin. you pulled back, looking into his eyes, full of nothing but love and admiration. you were sure yours were conveying the same emotion.
your lips met in a passionate kiss, one the two of you would deem to be the best one you had shared, until your wedding day.
joshua:
balcony while on vacation. planned on asking you during dinner but chickened out. you were slow dancing while it rained, before his love for you overtook his brain, making him spontaneously propose then and there.
the night had been perfect. you see yourself thinking that thought every day that you spend in joshua's arms. but it's true. he brightens up every day of your life.
you had been worried at first. he seemed as though he had something on your mind during dinner. you were petrified you had done something to upset you, but he had assured you it had just been a long week. after his reassurance, the rest of the meal passed as usual, him returning to his charming self.
now, the two of you were found on the balcony of your hotel suite. despite the freezing temperatures the rain had caused, neither of you could find it in yourself to care. you were holding onto each other tightly, your head buried in josh's chest, as his chin rests atop your head. even though there was no music to be heard, the two of you continued your gentle swaying, the rhythm of the rain being the tempo you moved to. the silence was calming.
you felt his chin move from your head, before he pushed you back slightly, just enough to look down into your eyes. his eyes were sparkling, glistening, as per usual, but you soon noticed something else swimming in them. he had tears resting on his lash line, ready to fall at any moment.
concerned you reached up to cradle his face, asking what had bothered him.
"i just love you so much. more than you could ever imagine."
you open your mouth to return the sentiment, but his movement stops you. he pulls something out from his pants pocket, before dropping to one knee. he attempts to say the words he had practiced many times before, but the tightness of his throat stops him.
"i- i love you, y/n, so so much. will... will you marry-"
before he can finish his sentence, your lips crash onto his, the two of you silently sobbing into each others mouths. he breaks off the kiss with a chuckle.
"is that a yes ?" god, his smile could blind you.
"yes, you idiot" yet there was no malice found in your words. his hand comes up to you cheek, to steer you into another passion-filled kiss.
not proof-read ! lmk if there's any mistakes (づ￣ 3￣)づ
#seventeen#seventeen x reader#seventeen fluff#svt#svt x reader#svt fluff#scoups x reader#scoups fluff#jeonghan x reader#jeonghan fluff#joshua x reader#joshua fluff
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YKWIM
Satori Tendou x Female!Reader
Warnings: Language, Angst, Reader was really just trying to help Tendou through some rough times and Tendou snapped at her >:(, sad Tendou
Word Count: 2.7k
Author's Note: Hi everyone! I've noticed that everyone really liked the Tendou smut I posted a couple of days ago and I've been so happy to see the reblogs and likes that its gotten! I've been recovering from being sick for the past six days and I don't know why I'm on such a Satori kick lately! He's a huge comfort character for me I feel, so I wrote SO MANY fics for him. I'll post them all and then I'll move on from posts about him, I'm sorry😭 Anyways, I hope you all enjoy this angst! Feel free to send in an ask if you have a request or even just some feedback:)
Author's note pt.2: I listened to YKWIM by Yot Club while I was writing this, so you can tell why my title is the name of the song hehe lolol. I reccommend listening to it while you read, I find that it really adds on to the atmosphere at the beginning of this :)
~Mod Shoyo
“How long has Tendou-senpai been like this?” A worried Goshiki spoke up.
Semi sighed. “Since he snapped at Y/N the other day.”
Tendou looked like a mess. His normally spiked hair was disheveled and limp. The bags under his eyes got darker. (which mostly everyone thought was impossible) His ruby eyes were puffy and bloodshot. No one knew what to do or how to help him. But Tendou didn’t want any help. He just wanted his apology to be accepted finally so he can have her back. He needed her back.
“He snapped at Y/N?” Reon queried in disbelief. “Man, I wonder what got him so riled up,”
Goshiki looked at his upperclassman with teary eyes. He’d never seen Tendou look so dejected, so depressed. Tendou was always the morale booster. He was the teammate to make everyone feel better and to lift them up. But who was going to make him feel better?
Their middle blocker had lost his smile.
Ushijima stared at Satori from the opposite side of the court. His eyes held the same monotone nature that most people assumed, but in reality, he was actually worried for his friend. Wakatoshi shifted his gaze to the left and noticed the rest of the players just staring at the guess blocker from afar. Nothing was going to change if someone didn’t at least try and help. As the player that Tendou was closest to, Ushijima took it upon himself to make the first move.
“Satori-san,” Tendou looked up, his eyes widening slightly when Ushijima stood in front of him. “You’re going to severely hurt your back if you keep slouching. You should get some rest.”
Tendou looked down at the floor and sniffled. Tears welled up in his eyes for the umpteenth time and fell onto the gym floor. Ushijima didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know how Tendou liked to be comforted in times like this. Hell, he’d never thought he would ever see him like this in the first place.
“Come on Satori, let’s get you some water.” Ushijima blurted out.
Tendou walked away with the ace of Shiratorizawa, sniffling and letting his sobs rack his shoulders a bit louder now. Once they made it to the vending machine closest to the gym, Ushijima pulled out some loose coins from the pocket of his jacket and paid for water. Tendou looked at his reflection in the glass of the machine and sighed.
“I made her cry Wakatoshi-kun,” Tendou admitted. He shut his eyes tightly and let out another sob. “I made her cry.”
Ushijima remained silent. “She was just trying to help and I made her cry.” While most figured the only thing that was ever on Ushijima’s mind was volleyball, he actually was very attentive to the ones close to him. Tendou being one of them.
He knew all about Y/N. Tendou liked to talk about her a lot. She was a manager for Karasuno, Ushijima had actually seen her in person and got introduced to her when they played Karasuno in a match. Tendou was on fire that day. He was trying so hard to impress Y/N, and while Ushijima could argue that she served as a distraction for the guess blocker, she actually fueled him to play his best. Everything about Y/N brought out the best in him, and Ushiwaka knew how much she meant to his friend. He felt horrible for him.
Tendou was in a slump. That was easy for Y/N to notice the second she walked into his dorm to visit him. Her eyes softened at the sight of her boyfriend looking so glum. She dropped everything she had brought with her right next to his door and rushed over to him.
“Tori, what’s the matter love?” She cooed, sitting next to him on his bed. Tendou just stayed quiet. This was worse than she thought. “Do you need anything?”
Tendou sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I need space.”
Y/N’s heart dropped to her stomach. “Sp-Space?” Did he just need a few minutes of alone time? Or did he need space away from her completely, from their relationship? Y/N tried to not let her overthinking get the best of her, but the way he phrased his answer really didn’t help that at all.
“What?” That’s all that she could muster up. Ask him to repeat himself; ask him for clarification.
An annoyed growl left Tendou’s lips and he stood up from his bed. Y/N straightened her posture and jumped at how suddenly he moved away from her.
“Space! I need you to not breathe down my neck and ask me a million questions like you always do! I need you to leave me alone so I can sort through all the shit that's going on right now!”
Y/N was shocked. She was paralyzed and found it difficult to move her limbs. “T-Tendou whatever it is, I’m here for you! You’re not alone,”
“That’s the thing, Y/N.” Using her first name rather than the million pet names he had given her always did something to her. Hearing him use it in such a vain and angry tone was enough to make tears well up in her eyes. “You can’t just let me sort these out on my own. You always have to squeeze yourself into the midst of the problem and I just want five fucking minutes where you just shut the hell up and stop asking me so many fucking questions!”
He was yelling now. His voice was echoing throughout the room, even worse, his words were echoing in her mind. Did she really annoy him that much? Pester him with so many questions that he could never think straight? Did that mean he lied to her whenever he told her how much she’s helped him work through issues?
She’d never heard him so angry before. “Tendou, why didn’t you just tell me?” He scoffed and adorned a smile on his face despite his anger.
“Because I have a million other fucking things on my plate, Y/N. God for fucks sake, are you really that stupid?" Her heart stung with that one.
"That school in France I applied to? Rejected me. I haven’t heard back from any of the safety schools, I don’t have the money even with a scholarship to make it to my culinary school, and I can’t find any jobs right now that are gonna hire me in time to make the payment! The least of my worries right now is telling you that you ask me too many questions and fucking hound me like a lap dog trying to get answers and reassurance out of me!”
Y/N burst into tears, her sniffles now joining the sounds of his anguish. She wiped at her eyes vigorously (Something she did because she hated when people watched her cry).
“Dear god, stop with the tears already.”
If looks could kill, Tendou would be gutted, sliding against the wall of his room drowning in his own blood. The tears burned as they slid down Y/N’s face. The second Satori finished his sentence, he saw her heart shatter right before his very eyes. He didn’t have the right mindset to calm down and realize what he had just done. His chest was heaving with anger, but the look on Y/N’s face was finally snapping him back to reality.
She couldn’t even bring herself to say another word. She simply stood up from his bed and went to the front of his door where she had dropped all of her things. She picked everything up off the floor and opened the door.
“I’m going home. I’ll give you your fucking space.” She choked out.
She slammed the door to his room behind her and he could hear her footsteps retreating. He sank to the floor and brought his knees up to his chest, burying his face in his hands as he sobbed into his palms. His shoulders were racking with cries. He let out harsh screams into his hands and cursed at himself for hours. He fell asleep on the floor, phone in his hand.
He was waiting for her to text him that she had made it to her house safely, but it never came.
Ushijima sighed. As the water fell into the crater at the bottom of the vending machine, his tall figure stooped down to grab it and hand it to Tendou. He popped the cap open for him and shoved it in front of his face.
“Drink this. It’ll help you calm down.”
Tendou let out a shaky sigh and took a sip from the bottle with quivering lips, even as he sipped on the drink, he was sniffling and tears were still gliding down his cheeks. The red head lowered the bottle and now just held the cold drink in his clammy hands.
“You need to apologize to Y/N.” Ushijima stated. “What you said really hurt her feelings and not apologizing is what’s keeping you like this.”
Tendou sniffled. “I can’t lose her Wakatoshi. She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I- I let bad habits from my past push her away from me.”
A soft grunt left Ushijima. Tendou looked up at his best friend with a newfound respect. “Go apologize to her. That’s what will make her realize that she misses you as much as you do her.”
Ushijima went back into the gym and left Tendou by himself. The silence gave him the willpower to realize that Ushijima was right. He needed to show her that he’s been a mess ever since he made her cry and he needed to get her back.
Tendou was quickly on the next bus to Karasuno. He knew that she would be at the practice helping them. So would the entire team, but they were an obstacle he was willing to overcome to get to her. The bus hissed and the brakes squeaked as he rushed off. He dashed over to the Karasuno gym. His ears rang with the sounds of volleyballs hitting the waxed gym floor. He threw the door open and the sound alone was enough to get everyone’s attention.
Tendou bowed quickly. “I need to speak with Y/N,” He blurted out. “Please.”
Y/N looked at him with wide eyes.
“You have got a LOT of fucking nerve to show up here after what you did Satori,” Daichi scowled from across the gym.
“Coach,” Y/N bowed. “I’m so sorry for the interruption. May I be excused for just a couple minutes?”
Ukai turned and looked at Tendou. He couldn’t help but think about how much this kid looked like shit. Serves him right for being the reason Y/N showed up to practice so sad. Not even Ukai could bear to look at her looking the way she did.
“You let us know if you need some help, alright? I’ll send Noya and Tanaka out there if you need anything.”
Noya and Tanaka puffed their chests out and walked their manager over to Tendou. Once she stepped out the door, Tanaka grabbed Tendou by the collar of the black hoodie he was wearing. Noya scowled and got up in Tendou’s face.
“Listen here, if she comes in here looking half as bad as she did a couple days ago, we will beat you into a fucking pulp.” Tanaka threatened,
“Our manager means everything to us, so the second that I hear a sniffle or a tear drop hit the floor, you better count the fucking seconds you have left before we beat your ass. And that’s a promise from the whole team.” Noya growled.
Tendou cleared his throat. He had so many smart comments to say to the two second years. But right now, the only thing that mattered was that he got to talk to Y/N.
“I’m here to set things right. I know how much she means to you monster children, but she means more to me. Now fucking let go of me,”
Tanaka shoved Tendou out of his grip and watched with narrow eyes as he stepped outside with Y/N. Contrary to popular assumption, the entire Karasuno team, including the coaches, went to the windows to listen in on their manager's conversation with Tendou. It was so wrong of them, and all of them knew that, but not only did they wanna make sure Y/N was okay, they needed to hear how apologetic that cocky Shiratorizawa blocker really was.
“Paradise, I came here to tell you how sorry I am about the other night. For me to push all of that frustration and fear onto you wasn’t right of me at all and you didn’t deserve to be yelled at the way you were.” Tendou began. “The second I saw those tears fall from your eyes I knew I fucked up. I-I was just so angry and I fell back into my old habit of just pushing everyone away. Now that I have you, I understand that I can’t do that anymore.”
Y/N looked up into his bloodshot orbs. He was being so sincere, she was glad he finally realized he fucked up. But she wasn’t going to just forgive him without speaking about what was on her mind. He needed to feel like shit for what he put her through.
“Thank you for finally speaking up about it. I was waiting for you to apologize.” She admitted. “Look, I know that I can get annoying with the questions I ask, I’ll give you that. But what you need to understand is that I’m throwing everything aside in my life, EVERYTHING, just so I can find solutions to your problems. All I ever want is to help you Satori, and for you to just blow up at me and fucking tell me you need space? You can’t tell me that there wasn’t room for me to think that you wanted to break up with me.”
Tendou froze. She really thought he was breaking up with her? Maybe that’s why she was as upset as she was, and why his words stung as much as they did. She thought that he was leaving her.
“I’m glad you realized that you were wrong. And thank you for apologizing to me. But I need to know that something like this isn’t going to happen again.”
Tendou stammered. For once, there was no snarky comment, no immediate answer for what she was asking of him. The middle blocker looked down at his feet, then he met her eyes.
“I’ll communicate with you more. I should’ve told you about my schools and everything and letting it build up wasn’t good at all. I’m going to be more upfront with you even about the things I’m scared to talk about. I can’t lose you Y/N, you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me; you’re my paradise.”
Her heart melted at his words. “I promise you, I will never ever make tears fall from those pretty eyes ever again. It broke my heart to see you leave so angry at me, and it hurt me even more to know that it was my fault. Please, please forgive me.”
She paused. Tears welled up in her eyes once more and Tendou’s face fell. She missed him so much and it had taken her so long to not go and find him, to grovel at his feet and apologize for leaving him the way she did.
She threw her arms around him and buried her face into his chest. He placed his head onto the top of her head and squeezed her tightly. He missed her so much.
“I missed you 'Tori,” She mumbled into his hoodie. “I’m so sorry,”
“Don’t apologize paradise, I’m just glad to have you back now. For good.”
Tendou lifted her chin up towards him and stooped down to place his lips onto hers. The slight chap on his lips meant nothing to her, she was just glad that she had her Satori back. She missed how his lips molded with hers. He missed having someone to run to when he was feeling down.
She was his everything. And he was so glad to not have lost her.
#anime#anime x reader#haikyuu!#haikyuu one shot#haikyuu drabble#haikyuu third years#x reader#female reader#fanfiction#tendou#satori tendou#tendou angst#shiratorizawa angst#ushijima#tendou x reader#satori tendou x reader#karasuno#daichi#nishinoya#tanaka#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu angst#angst#middle blocker#tendou x y/n#haikyuu x y/n
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
Thanks to @kiwiana-writes for the tag!! I did this back in like... October, and a LOT has changed since then lol
How many works do you have on ao3?
29
What's your total ao3 word count?
299,988 (though this includes 110,000 from the co-written PJO AU and 2,000 words from Manu's fic that I podficced to)
What fandoms do you write for?
Only RWRB for now, though never say never to others. I recently read Check, Please! and I've had some thoughts, but I have far too many WIPs for RWRB to write them rn. Also I have some ideas for The Pairing, but again, I have... so many RWRB wips...
Top five fics by kudos:
Longer Than Most | 26K, trans Henry accidental pregnancy (also this is how I found out it had become my top kudos-ed fic AH)
The Super Six Take a Lie Detector Test | Vanity Fair | 7K, YouTube interview
Let Me inside (I Want to Get to Know You) | 6K, epistolary roommates
Claremont 2008 | 28K, canon divergence where Ellen gets elected in 2008, childhood friends to lovers
(Dil)Do It Yourself | 17K, meet cute at a DIY dildo workshop
Do you respond to comments?
I really try to. But. I have gotten quite behind recently. I would love to catch up but it's just a bit overwhelming at the moment.
What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I don't really have any angsty endings?? but a fic @affectionatelyrs and I are working on is going to have an ambiguous ending and my joke is that someone should the version of it where things take the angsty route
What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
I mostly write happy endings, but I am going to say that Let Me inside (I Want to Get to Know You) is the happiest because it's kinda the tropiest
Do you get hate on fics?
Not hate, but I've gotten one or two weird comments, or comments asking about updates.
Do you write smut?
I do! (this is one of the things that's changed since the fall)
Craziest crossover:
The closest I've gotten to a crossover is the PJO AU, but that's not even an actual crossover.
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Nope.
Have you ever had a fic translated?
Nope.
Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Yes!! Super Six and the Siren's Call with @inexplicablymine and @read-and-write- was the first, and then I wrote Let Me inside (I Want to Get to Know You) with @affectionatelyrs. I also did the podficcing of the voice notes for love has a voice (and it's yours) by Manu. I've also got a couple more projects coming up with Jamie also.
All time favorite ship?
Well that I've written for, FirstPrince :)
What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Unfortunately I don't know if I'll ever finish Baby's First Pride because I've grown a ton as a writer since then and I would want to redo the old chapters and that just isn't all the compelling to me anymore...
What are your writing strengths?
I fucking hate this question. But I am going with dialogue and humor (and humorous dialogue) which has been co-signed by others so I feel less weird about saying this.
What are your writing weaknesses?
I would like to be able to keep smut more concise at times, because it always turns into a Big Scene but it doesn't always need to be a Big Scene. And I've been trying to work on a particular style of writing which is a bit more uhhh snappy? I don't know how to describe it. But that's still a huge work in progress, because I always get more rambly than I want.
Thoughts on dialogue in another language?
I definitely try to include it for the characters in RWRB who speak other languages, and when I do I lean on my friends who speak those languages as a native speaker.
First fandom you wrote in?
Officially: RWRB. For myself: HP.
Favorite fic you've written?
Honestly it's always whatever I'm working on at the moment, which is a couple of WIPs: Fire Island WIP, Parasocial Relationship AU with @affectionatelyrs, and my Big Bang fic come to mind.
But really I want to know what y'all's favorite fic of mine is!!!!
I'll tag 20 people, sorry if anyone's done this recently, but in case anyone wants to go again: @mainstreamelectricalparade @14carrotghoul @anincompletelist @littlemisskittentoes @gay-flyboys
and @songliili @gayrootvegetable @leojfitz @welcometololaland @rmd-writes
and @bigassbowlingballhead @eusuntgratie @captainjunglegym @cactusdragon517 @cricketnationrise
and @violetbaudelaire-quagmire @bribumblebee @nocoastposts @magicandarchery @itsmaybitheway!!!
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20 Qᴜᴇꜱᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ꜰɪᴄ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇʀꜱ
Tagged by the lovely @snarky-magpie - thank you!!
1. How many works do you have on A03? 13 (for now...☺️)
2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 429,228
3. What fandoms do you write for? Voltron: Legendary Defender and Call of Duty: MW Reboot
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
- Couch Surfing (COD, soapghost)
- Broken Bones & Shattered Hearts (COD, soapghost)
- Up in Smoke (COD, soapghost)
- Formalities (Voltron, sheith)
- Research and Development (Voltron, sheith)
5. Do you respond to comments? YES. I love talking to people in the comments. 😍
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Probably Couch Surfing because it's an "in progress" ending. But it's still mostly happy because I can't really write anything else. LOL
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Probably Formalities? But all of them are pretty tooth-rotting...
8. Do you get hate on fics? No
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes, but it's always slow burn smut with feelings (hi, I'm ace).
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I love thinking about crossovers, but I haven't written any yet (unless you count the AU from question 13, I guess).
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I know of.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Not that I know of.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? The soapghost Punisher AU I'm working on with @kibagib - You're my mask, you're my cover, my shelter - is basically co-written. Kiba gives me the outline for what they want to happen in the scene, and I write it out, adding my own flare here and there. It's been so much fun to work together to bring Kiba's visions to life!
14. What’s your all time favorite ship? As much as I love soapghost, I think sheith will always have my heart.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? So far, I've finished or am actively working on all my WIPs... 😯 I do have an idea for a soapghost inter-dimensional-travel, angst-with-a-bittersweet ending fic, but that one hasn't gotten past outline phase. That's the closest I have to a fic I might never finish. (This fic would also win "angstiest ending," btw.)
16. What are your writing strengths? I think I write dialogue and emotions/introspection pretty well.
17. What are your writing weaknesses? I struggle with descriptions - they are often what I "add in" during the editing phases. I'm also a VERY SLOW writer, which is why it takes so long to update sometimes.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I don't do it unless I have a native speaker willing to help me with the translation. Otherwise, it's just English but in italics. LOL
19. First fandom you wrote for? Dragon Age (long ago with a different user name)
20. Favourite fic you’ve written? I love them all, but my first sheith fic - In Sunshine and in Shadow - will always be special to me because it helped me process that atrocious VLD ending.
Tagging... errmmmm... @oodelally9 @kayluvlygrey @hawkeykirsah @ticktockclockwork @ursae-minoris-world @insomnikat-mused @chalkofthevalley
No pressure! Ignore or play as you like!
#sheith#shiro x keith#soapghost#ghostsoap#ghoap#COD#vld#Call of Duty#COD MW reboot#writing#my writing#OG Starlight
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fic writer meme!
[RISES FROM THE DEPTHS] I'm here!! Thank you so much @uhuraisgay and @englishsub for the tags, and also for reminding me that I've missed Tumblr
1. how many works do you have on ao3?
50 even - which was more than I thought!
2. what's your total ao3 wordcount?
187,448
3. what fandoms do you write for?
My fic-writing impulses come along like cicada seasons, except without any regularity whatsoever: I do a lot of dabbling in a lot of fandoms, I can never really tell if something's going to light my brain on fire. Most of my fic output came from Yuletide for a long while (I loved the grab bag aspect and writing little treats for small fandoms, but then my holidays got busier), and then Yuri on Ice and MDZS were my biggest fandoms by far, especially MDZS. I've written Yuwu recently, and I'd love to write some Trigun, LoZ, or Mysterious Lotus Casebook one of these days.
4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?
grow
the only way out
The Guests of Cloud Recesses
detente
bespoke
And the soft animal is our runner-up at #6!
5. do you respond to comments?
I usually don't unless it's a request or a question, but I read and treasure every one.
6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I am too tender for Bad Endings for the most part, but my canon-verse Nie Huaisang fic after me comes the flood does not end in a particularly good place for anyone involved. (But even then, we know it gets better for him eventually... albeit at the expense of several bystanders)
7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
I tend to write pretty gentle, occasionally LIGHTLY bittersweet happy endings (that's the cafecliche guarantee baby) but part of me wants to say 'the only way out' (and probably 'the yunmeng accords' series in general) here. I tend to write fic when I want to play around with the emotions or relationship dynamics that can already be found in canon, so 'the yunmeng accords' is probably as close to a fix-it as I'm going to get.
8. do you get hate on fics?
Not usually! I was part of the Great MDZS Anon Hate Train of 2021, but that was the worst I've ever gotten by several magnitudes - the vast majority of commenters are fabulous.
9. do you write smut?
Not yet! It's not off the table, though.
10. do you write crossovers? what's the craziest one you have written?
I actually don't think I've ever written a crossover! The closest I've ever gotten was when I look over my shoulder, but even that's 'Wangxian in a Conjuring-esque ghosthunters in love situation' and not really a formal Conjuring AU.
11. have you ever had a fic stolen?
I've had plagiarism brought to my attention a couple times, but truly just a handful. I still remember getting a message on FF.net that someone had ripped off a line from my Black Lagoon fic. The SCANDAL of it all.
12. have you ever had a fic translated?
MDZS is the first fandom where I've gotten translation requests, which is always so cool! To my knowledge, I've had fics translated into Russian, Spanish, and Ukranian.
13. have you ever co-written a fic before?
No, but brainstorming fic concepts with my brilliant friends is one of my favorite thing in the world.
14. what's your all time favorite ship?
omg ever? Well Victuuri and Wangxian have been the ones that really lit my brain on fire (if I own the Nendos, it's serious) but let me also throw it back to Fakir and Ahiru in Princess Tutu. That is ROMANCE.
15. what is a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
I would have really liked to have one more entry to 'the yunmeng accords!' I had a couple of ideas that I really liked, but nothing that caught fire quite enough to dive into it. That said, I am currently working on something short and Yunmeng Shuangjie-related, at the very least...
16. what are your writing strengths?
Emotional through-lines, pacing, and that sweet, sweet catharsis. I'm drawn to particular fandoms when they leave me with an emotion that I need to break down over the course of several thousand words, and I know that shows through in my writing.
17. what are your writing weaknesses?
Choreography! I'm not a very visual thinker, so sometimes it takes me a while just to figure out how to block the characters in a given scene. I also have a lot of trouble getting into a draft until I figure out the voice, which, when it comes to fanfic, will either come to me extremely easily or not at all.
18. thoughts of writing dialogue in another language in fics?
Yeah, absolutely! (But if you don't speak the language, do your research!)
19. first fandom you wrote for?
[rubs my temples] an X-Men crackfic.
20. favorite fic you have written?
Oh my god. WELL. 'grow' and 'the only way out' I think are the best fics I've written, and 'when I look over my shoulder' and 'the soft animal' are also extremely close to my heart. But 'detente' might be the favorite child. It just gushed out of me.
I think a great many of you have been tagged at this point, so sorry for any double-tags, but: @bluecrystalrainingdaggers @tigerjpg @floofyfluff @vinelark and anyone else who'd like to go for it!
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20 questions for fic writers
Yoinked from the lovely @sallysavestheday and @melestasflight!
1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 65, though one is a compilation of unrelated short pieces.
2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 199,601
3. What fandoms do you write for? Mostly Tolkien, though I have a few older bits and bobs from other fandoms hanging around.
4. What are your top five fics by kudos? In terms of kudos, my various Kidnap Fam stories are overwhelmingly my most popular:
A Stitch in Time (Elrond's life as seen by a quilt)
And They Looked Up and Saw a Star (Early-days Kidnap Fam WIP)
Root and All (Kidnap Fam feat. Maedhros, Elrond, and botany)
Speak No Evil (Kidnap Fam feat. Orkish lessons)
Little Drop of Poison (Kidnap Fam feat. injured Maedhros and healer Elrond)
5. Do you respond to comments? I try to respond to them all, but sometimes my responses are very late, especially if the comment comes when I'm having a depressive episode or a chronic illness flare-up.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Leaving aside unfinished multichaps that will have angsty endings but haven't gotten there yet, it's probably either The Hearts of the Eldar (the Third Kinslaying and all that it entails) or Pain Unbearable (Maedhros' death).
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Probably Half Past Ten in the Rose Garden (Caranthir/Caranthir's Wife engagement rom-com). Still debating whether I should add another chapter or wrap it where it is.
8. Do you get hate on fics? Only ever on fics featuring Fingon's wife. Some people get real heated about those.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I don't, nor do I read it. It's very much Not My Thing. I think the closest I've come is The Bed We Share (Fingon/Fingon's Wife, Fingon/Maedhros), which does have a sex scene, but it's not particularly detailed.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? No, though I do enjoy reading them on occasion. I'm going to take this opportunity to recommend Evidence by Camwyn on FF.N, which is the single most delightful crossover I've ever read. (Silmarillion/Discworld)
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes! A kind reader translated Root and All into Russian, where it seems to have been moderately well-received, at least from what I can tell using Google Translate.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Nope. I suppose I'd be willing to give it a shot, but I do have Very Strong characterization opinions that might make it difficult.
14. What’s your all time favorite ship? Maedhros/Fingon! Though Elrond/Celebrian and Caranthir/Caranthir's Wife are close seconds, and Glorfindel/Erestor and Legolas/Gimli are very old and longstanding favorites as well.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Things ain't lookin' good for The Longest Journey I Have Known (Fingon's wife and Celebrian travel to Valinor). I am Extremely Stuck.
16. What are your writing strengths? Worldbuilding, character dynamics, and description.
17. What are your writing weaknesses? PLOT. God, I am so bad at come up with interesting plots. Also probably pacing, I need to improve in that respect.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I do it rarely -- in fact I think Maps might be the only Silmarillion story where I've done it. I included a Quenya translation of part of a Yiddish folk song, and in that case I had help from the Lizard Council, and particularly from the esteemed and dearly missed Darth Fingon, who looked over my translation and corrected a few errors.
19. First fandom you wrote for? Star Wars, back in, uh, 1999, I think? I've been doing this for a good 25 years.
20. Favourite fic you’ve written? Girl, that's like asking a mother to choose her favorite child! But if I absolutely must pick, it's probably The Flight of Birds, which features Elrond, newly arrived on Balar, dealing with his conflicted feelings about his mother.
Tagging @thelordofgifs, @vidumavi, @cuarthol, @swanhild, @leucisticpuffin, @emyn-arnens, @polutrope, @welcomingdisaster, @zealouswerewolfcollector, @that-angry-noldo, @thescrapwitch, @spiritofwhitefire, @swanmaids, @hhimring, @elfscribe, and anyone else who wants to share -- @ me and say I tagged you!
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reminders of him - eddie munson
summary: it's your first night in your own room after all that happened. you're all alone, freshly showered, and ready for bed. but, sleep doesn't come to you as easily as you'd hoped. the only thing that fills your head is him.
warnings: mentions of death, vecna (pre, during, and post), trouble falling asleep, hella angst, fluff, pet names (pretty girl, my girl, my daring enchantress—this is eddie we're talking about, baby, sweetheart, sweet girl), making out, removal of clothes, allusion to smut (probably the closest i've ever gotten to truly writing it tbh), eddie being the best boyfriend, eddie's death unfortunately, proofread once
a/n: idk why i was in a heartbreaking mood when writing this, but for my angst lovers, this is for you. also this is kinda inspired by the song ceilings by lizzy mcalpine
word count: 6.9k+
❀ masterlist ❀
your sheets smelled of fresh cotton when you finally got the chance to fall into them, the scent filling your nostrils and bringing a wave of comfort over yourself that you hadn't felt in several days. it felt like it had been months. maybe even years.
since it happened, you hadn't had a true chance to just be. between spending your time at max's bedside with the sinclairs, helping out hawkins citizens at the school with steve, dustin, and robin, and just making sure everyone else was okay, you let your own needs get lost in the mix and you were exceedingly exhausted.
being in the shower felt nice. the near-sizzling droplets pelting your sore muscles forced them to loosen up from the constant tension they'd endured since chrissy died.
chrissy.
your eyes screwed shut as the memory resurfaced and you tried to rid your mind of it by giving it a light shake. your attempts were mostly futile, so you resorted to focusing on something else: getting some sleep somewhere other than a ridiculously uncomfortable hospital chair and steve harrington's couch.
once you had settled and pulled the blanket up to your chest, you turned from your side to lie on your back and closed your eyes. just when you finally let them shut, you could only see flashes of what happened while you were down there and opened them again. since you couldn't make yourself fall asleep, you'd just have to wait it out until your body fell asleep naturally like you had been doing.
staring up after so long made you realize how much you despise popcorn ceilings. but at least you could make your own constellations out of the small hills that coated it to pass the time.
huffing in annoyance at your inability to go to sleep, you turned back onto your side and take in the small details of your room. down by your desk legs were your favorite pair of yellow converse and a small yet sad smile pulled at your lips at the memory that flooded your mind.
you were wearing them when you met him.
"shit, shit, shit. you stupid piece of shit! don't do this to me now," you grumbled at the vehicle. you were almost home. you had just made it to hawkins. why did your car have to crap out on you now?
pulled over on the side of the road maybe a half mile away from the 'welcome to hawkins' sign, you turned the key over again only to hear a nasty sputtering coming from under the hood. you stopped, not wanting to make whatever the issue was any worse, and leaned your head against the steering wheel for a moment.
a short, exasperated, "fuck," fell from your lips before you lifted your head to look outside. the rain seemed to pick up even harder, almost tauntingly. you wanted to cry but felt like it'd be a waste of time at this point. you'd left your umbrella in your bedroom too so you'd have to brace this weather all on your own.
taking in a short inhale to calm your nerves, you placed your keys in your pocket and got out to begin the trek to the nearest phone booth just past the trailer park. you just hoped no weirdos found you on your way.
"hey!" someone called when you walked past some of the trailers. you were going to pretend like you didn't even hear the person shouting for you, but the voice sounded somewhat familiar. you turned at the sound of the footsteps jogging to approach you.
"yeah?" you asked, seeing none other than eddie munson stopping in front of you. you knew of the boy. he was the one a lot of the jocks liked to pick on, but you admired how he ignored them and kept on being him.
"what are you doing walking out here in the rain?" he inquired, brows pulled together in what seemed like concern for you. "are you okay?"
the rainwater that hit his head made his usually unruly curly mess of locks a bit tamer and for some reason, whether it be his caring nature or the rain drawing your attention to his features, your stomach felt fluttery. eddie munson, leader of hellfire, three-time senior, was making butterflies fly around in your tummy.
"my car broke down and i need a phone."
"you are welcome to come inside and use mine," he offered as a water drop fell from the bangs that were stuck to his forehead down his nose, and then down to the ground. why have you never noticed how cute he was until now?
"okay."
you let your eyes fall down to your shoes which were no doubt housing their own little ponds with how much water had filled them on the walk thus far. you could feel the water slosh around with each step you took as you followed eddie back to his trailer.
"let me get you a towel," he told you once you were inside before disappearing into one of the rooms—the bathroom, you assumed—down the hall and coming out with a large towel. "here," he spoke softly when he stepped closer to you to wrap the towel around your shoulders. after running his hands over the towel to make sure it was in place, he gave you a short grin before leading you to the phone.
once he saw you put the phone to your ear, he left the room to give you some privacy while the sound of the line ringing was heard on your end. in curiosity, you glanced around the place and took in the details. eddie or whoever he lived with was very seriously into mugs. the messiness was definitely eddie's doing though.
while the ringing continued, you heard a thud come from the room eddie went in followed by an, "oh shit."
you rolled your eyes and giggled until the line went dead. when you tried again, you got the same result.
"fuck."
eddie reentered the room, his hair looking a little drier and messier. "everything alright?"
"no one answered," you said after turning to face him. you pulled the edges of the towel closer around your body for some warmth and leaned against the wall behind you.
"oh," eddie started before you watched an idea pop into his head, "you could stay here if you want or i could drive you home."
the sound of the rain pelting the roof grew louder and louder by the second, enough to make both you and eddie look up to the ceiling as if the raindrops would pierce through the roof. the flash of light that came from the window and the roar of thunder that followed it seemed to mock you even further as you deflated.
your eyes came back down to meet his. "i can't make you drive in this weather."
"i can't let you walk home in this weather," he added to his point.
"then, i guess i'll stay."
within the moments that followed, eddie had given you the grand munson trailer tour—all you had left to see was the bathroom and his bedroom really—a fresh set of clothes to change into that he had tossed in the dryer for a second to warm up for you, set your shoes up in front of a box fan to dry, placed your previous clothes in the dryer, and turned the heater on so you'd be warm in his room since he refused to let you sleep on the couch.
"you all good?" he asked from the doorway where he stood.
"yes, eddie. you've done more than enough. you don't have to worry about me anymore. thank you," you told him honestly. you had expressed your gratitude to him so much tonight, but the boy just kept on giving. why he was so widely hated on at your school was mind blowing to you now that you had experienced firsthand just how nice he was.
the boy wore a bashful grin before he spoke again. "you know, i've dabbled in some mechanic work over the past few summers so if you want, i could take a look at your car in the morning to see if i can figure out the issue."
"no, eddie. you don't have to," you began to protest. "you've already done so much for me. i can get it fixed on my own, though i appreciate the offer."
"can't a man want to help a pretty girl every once in a while?" he stated, not realizing the effect the pet name had on you. "come on, let me do it. i haven't been able to get my hands dirty in so long and i miss it. it's a win-win for both of us."
as you had learned progressively throughout the night, he was damn near impossible to say no to, so once again, you caved.
"okay." his excitement over the seemingly small matter was cute.
his smile made it all worth it.
you'd give anything to go back to that night now. what had started as an incredibly shitty night ended up being not so bad.
you just don't know what you'd do if given the opportunity.
would you have ignored him to begin with as you had originally planned to save yourself the heartache? or would you take in every moment even more since you know now how the story ends?
before you can think on it too long, your eyes shift from the shoes to your nightstand, more so to the paper circle that sits next to your lamp before you lean over to pick it up.
fiddling with the object, you thought back to the night you received it.
your first date.
"what's with us and rainy nights?" you commented as you watched the rain pick up outside the diner window. this wasn't like the rain from a couple of weeks ago though. this was much softer, more ambient than agressive.
he hummed in thought for a moment, eyes still trained on the straw paper between his fingertips. "i don't know," eddie spoke thoughtfully. it was an odd coincidence, but he was too focused on his creation.
you leaned forward against the table. "whatcha makin' over there, munson?"
"none of your business, y/l/n," he retorted playfully while moving his hands under the table to continue his work in private. his eyes lifted to meet yours with a smile on his lips. you couldn't help but return his grin.
while recounting another silly memory of your coworkers, steve and robin, from your shift yesterday to eddie, you fiddled with your own straw paper, tying it in multiple knots until the sheen on a silver pig came into view. his ringed hand laid over yours to hold it gently.
the man had all of your attention and your interest was piqued. based on what you knew solely about eddie before you two became closer was that he was full of surprises and with the budding relationship between you two, that very fact had been further cemented.
he turned his hand that held yours so that your palms were facing each other. he had singled out your ring finger and brought his other hand to it, sliding on the paper ring he had made for you. his fingers situated it so that the knot he'd constructed to resemble a gem was placed in the center before he looked up at you.
"for you, my daring enchantress," he muttered, still holding your hand in his. you were so focused on the warmth that was spreading throughout your entire body at his sweet actions that you almost missed his nickname for you.
"daring?" you inquired, eyebrow raised when you met his eyes.
"of course," he stated matter-of-factly as if there was no other way he'd view you other than that. "it takes guts to go on journeys in the dead of night while a mighty storm barrels on."
you loved how he'd get into storytelling mode, the cadence of his voice rising up and falling down with the swells and dips of the narrative. you let your head rest on your other hand, ready to sit and listen to how his story continued in awe.
"i'm lucky i had a charming knight in shining leather looking out for me that night," you added with a smile. eddie shared a bashful grin with youu before his eyes fell down to your joined hands, seemingly wanting to avoid eye contact with you.
"i'm not sure if it was luck," he mumbled mildly, playing with the paper ring on your finger in a nervous manner. "at least on your end anyway."
in an instant, your heart moves from feeling fluttery to feeling tight.
you flipped your hand to hold his and brought your other to lay on top of them.
"hey," you called in hopes he'd look up at you. he did. "i guess i haven't made it very clear, but i will now. i like you, eddie. i'm kinda glad that piece of shit car broke down because if it hadn't, i would've only gotten to see you in passing at school, not really know you like i'm getting to do now. trudging in the rain and having the worst cold known to man the week after is something i'd do again if it'd get me here with you."
you relish in the way he perks up at your words. with the way he radiated confidence, you were kind of surprised to see him be a bit vulnerable and insecure, but you were ready to squash it and build him back up again.
these past few weeks you'd known eddie had been the best you'd had in a while. you weren't trying to give that up any time soon.
"alright," eddie sighed, leaning back in his seat, "i've gotta get you home. i'd hate to be on your parents' bad side before i've even met them."
the fluttery feeling returned at the thought of eddie being in your life long enough to meet your parents.
as much as you didn't want to leave, you knew that you had to. your curfew was at ten-thirty and it was currently fifteen minutes until then. after eddie paid—he insisted on it for the first date—led you to his van, opened the door for you, and drove you home, you two sat outside of your house for the last five minutes, continuing the conversation you'd been having on the ride over.
the clock reads 10:28 and you both know that you'll have to leave soon. the thing is that you really don't want to. you want to sit in eddie's passenger seat while his iron maiden cassette plays lowly in the background so you both can still hear each other when you talk.
you think eddie feels the same as you do when you meet his eye across the seat. after your eyes made that connection, it was like there was a magnetic pull between you two.
you scooted closer first, eddie soon to follow. his hand traveled up your arm to rest behind your neck while his other found your waist. your hands came to cradle his face and jacket and all it took was one look. one look that the two of you shared that let the other know that you wanted this desperately before your lips met his.
you remembered feeling on cloud nine that night. you'd fallen into the bed you lay on now, feeling giggly and warm all over.
you'd felt like the girls in movies you used to make fun of for acting like idiots after having any sort of encounter with the guy of their dreams. the ones who just had their first kiss with the guy they were in love with who couldn't wipe the stupid smile off their face and fell asleep dreaming of the moment over and over again.
you stretched to put the paper ring back on the bedside table and recoiled back to your laying position. sleep was gaining on you, but it wasn't quite there yet.
rolling back over onto your back, you grumbled lightly at your aggravation toward not being able to fall asleep. taking in a deep breath, you swore you could still smell the faint scent of weed from him. you wished he was here now to help you go to sleep. you always slept better in his arms.
you glanced to your left and attempted to imagine him there next to you like he was the first time he ever laid in your bed.
your parents were out for the weekend so obviously, eddie was staying over.
you didn't know what it was about him today, but you felt like you were ten times more in love with him than you were yesterday. it was probably the confession of love you two shared moments prior that led to the heated makeout session you two engaged in now.
it was a mess of lips, teeth, and tongue as you moved backward, letting eddie lead you to your bedroom. you weren't sure how you didn't bump into every wall and surface on your way in, but eddie was skilled at maneuvering you both while still giving your mouth the attention it deserved.
the back of your legs felt your mattress while your hands helped eddie's pull off his jacket and vest, leaving his top covered in his hellfire shirt. you gripped onto his shoulders and hair, not missing how he groaned when you unintentionally pulled on it. he felt the way your lips pulled into a smirk against his own and knew you were going to pull out that trick later on.
using one arm to hold you to him by your waist, he used his other to brace you both while he laid down with you on your bed.
"fuck," he muttered into your mouth, "i fuckin' love you, baby."
you giggled into the kiss in response until his lips moved to your jaw.
"i love you so much, eddie," you spoke in a breathy voice as you tried to get your mind back on track, but it was hard. you felt like you'd touched a live wire in the best way possible. "so much."
eddie's lips had made their way just below your ear and he started to suck on a particularly sensitive spot.
"oh shit," you breathed out blissfully. your fingers had scrunched up the material of his shirt to hold onto it before they moved down to the hem. "fuck, eddie. can i?"
he knew what you were asking for when he felt you tug at the end of the fabric and he was more than happy to oblige.
"please."
you wasted no time in ridding the boy of the club t-shirt and letting your eyes take in some of your favorite parts of him. his softness, both in his personality and physicality, was something that drew you to him from the beginning.
your hands ran down his gentle sides and up his back, taking in every bit of him. you adored the inked drawings on his skin and there was no way you weren't feeling dizzy at the sight of the trail of hair that went from below his navel and disappeared into his jeans.
"eddie," you whined as he continued his assault on your neck. you were definitely going to have to put in some work to make sure the marks he was leaving behind weren't visible to the naked eye when your parents got back.
"yeah, sweetheart?" he called to you, his voice so sultry and smooth. his eyes bored into yours when he lifted his head up to gaze at you. you'd never felt so nervous yet so at ease.
"i want more."
while eddie was delighted to hear it, he had to be sure. "positive?"
"please," you basically begged and the sound had eddie diving back down to kiss your lips until they were numb.
"can i take your shirt off?" he started, wanting to take it slow.
you, on the other hand, were too eager to feel him. you grabbed his hands in yours and led them to the bottom of your top, telling him without words to take it off. once he'd gotten it off, you made quick work to begin unbuttoning his pants.
"this is okay, right?" you inquired quickly. you wouldn't have started if you thought he wasn't okay with it, but you wanted to double-check.
"go right ahead, sweet girl. as long as i can take off this." his finger ran under the strap of your bra. your nod and continued work on his jeans answered his request so his hands slipped beneath you to fiddle with the hooks.
after that, it was a mixture of soft kisses, joined hands, whispers of love, pleasurable touches, linked bodies, and breathlessness.
once all was said and done, you curled into eddie's side, hearing his heartbeat under your ear. his ringed fingers ran up and down your bare back as he cherished the skin-to-skin contact and this moment with you. he had never felt for someone as he did for you and he'd hate for anything to tear you two apart.
"eddie?" your small voice broke the boy from his thoughts.
he pressed a small kiss to the top of your head before speaking up. "yeah?"
"please don't ever leave me," you mumbled into his skin, your arms tightening around him. it was lovely to be able to lay like this with him. you just didn't want it to ever end.
he gave you a small squeeze and lifted your face to meet his. "i would never ever leave my girl."
you were starting to get pissed with yourself. why couldn't you just fall asleep?
you sat up and glanced over to your bag, contemplating whether you should pack your bag and go somewhere else. maybe to steve's or robin's or if you waited long enough, you could wait for visiting hours to open up at the hospital and go see max. you never had this much trouble falling asleep at any of those places.
there were just too many reminders of him here and you couldn't fall asleep. when someone else was around, you could be distracted, but alone with yourself and your thoughts, sleep was proving to be a major obstacle.
slipping on some shorts and shoes, you walked out to your kitchen to dial steve's number. as you placed the phone between your ear and shoulder, you reached down to fix your shoelaces and caught a glimpse of the braided leather bracelet that circled your wrist currently. it had only been there for maybe twenty days at this point.
"i'm just saying. it's the cult of vecna. you can't miss it," eddie whined while pulling up to the school.
"you know i wouldn't miss it for the world if i hadn't already promised lucas, robin, and steve that i'd be at this game. it's the championship game, eddie," you shared with him even though he's known that for ages. it didn't mean he wasn't going to pout about it though.
dramatically, he threw his head back to hit the headrest after he parked, his hair moving wildly with his movements.
"stop it, you're going to make me feel bad," you told him once you situated yourself to turn and face him.
his eyes were screwed shut to add to the theatrics, but he popped one open to peek at you. his ridiculous behavior elicited a giggle from you and the sound alone was enough to make him drop the act and soften.
"fine, you're off the hook, but you have to give me a good luck kiss before you go."
you playfully scoffed. "like i would've let you leave without one."
you leaned up onto your knees and let your hands cup his face before your lips pressed against his. he gripped at your sides while trying to hold you close to him. he didn't want to let you go, but he was overly excited for hellfire tonight.
"just remember," he started, breaking away for a moment before diving back in, "i've got a deal tonight." another kiss. "but after that." he pulled you into his lap, a leg on either side of his thighs as you straddled him. "i'm all yours, baby."
you broke away for the sole reason of oxygen deprivation and took the moment to admire him with his messy hair, flushed cheeks, and swollen lips. a finger of yours came up to twirl a dark curled strand.
"promise?"
"i'll call you before i leave my house to head to yours," eddie shared, eyes watching you in adoration. he swore he could sit and observe you for hours on end if you let him.
he felt you try to move off of him to head inside, but his grip on your waist held you where you were.
"wait a second." confused, you watched him with a raised brow as he fiddled with one of the bracelets on his wrist. he'd taken off the leather one—it was the first piece of jewelry of his that you'd complimented—and began to wrap it around your wrist. "been meaning to give you this for a while now. i think it suits you better than me anyway," he spoke cooly like this wasn't a big deal though you both knew it was.
you just rolled your eyes and kissed his lips again.
"hellooo?" you heard steve's voice repeat into the phone. it took you a second to get out of your head and realize he'd spoken three times before you finally responded.
"sorry. uh, it's me, y/n. did i wake you?"
you could hear in his voice that you did, but he wasn't going to let you know that.
"oh no, i was just watching a movie," he fibbed. "what's up?"
"can't sleep," you started before looking back down at the bracelet. "i don't know if i can be here. it's a little too much, you know?"
steve understood. he always did.
"you know you're more than welcome to come over here."
a light smile pulled at your lips as you nodded though he couldn't see it. "thank you."
"no problem. i'll turn on the porch light."
you would never not be proud of who steve was now. he was almost like a completely different person compared to how he was a few years ago. and now that you know more of what he had endured in those few years, you respected and felt for him even more.
when you found out about it all was probably the most stressful day in your entire life.
"what if he's not here?" robin inquired, flashlight shining against the door of reefer rick's house.
"he has to be," you responded sharply. you wouldn't know what to do if he wasn't so there was no other option in your mind. eddie had to be here.
"could he be in there?" max called over to you guys. steve got dustin to stop yelling into the house—for one of the smartest people in your group, he sure did some dumb things—and followed you and robin to the redhead.
her light pointed to a secluded boathouse which was the perfect place to hide in your opinion. you could only hope eddie thought the same thing.
once inside, you all split to look around. you, max, and robin found some food wrappers that looked to be pretty recent given their lack of dusty coating while the boys bickered and prodded some tarp with an oar.
you, entirely fed up with the entire situation of your love being missing and hunted in addition to steve and dustin's constant squabbling, walked over and took the oar from steve's hands. both steve and dustin were staring at you in wonder.
neither of them had ever seen you so angry.
"you two need to get it together. eddie is missing. you hear me? missing. he's gone. so i don't have time for all this silly shit. so, stop being pussies and lift the damn tarp like a man." you punctuated your sentence by handing steve the oar back and lifting the tarp yourself.
only you didn't get to look at what was inside before you were pushed against the wall, broken glass held to your neck. but that isn't what you were focused on.
no, your eyes were locked on the ones you called home which were now filled with so much fear that it broke your heart in two. his next question only finalized that break.
"are you real?"
you softened immediately as tears pooled in your eyes.
"are you my charming knight in shining leather?" that was all eddie needed before he wrapped you tightly in his arms. you reciprocated, hands clutching at his jacket as you held him close.
ever since you saw his trailer in the background of the news this morning, you'd been terrified not only for him but of what he could've ended up in. max shared with you guys what chrissy's body looked like on eddie's living room floor and you were afraid he was in the same state somewhere else. and if he wasn't dead at the hands of whoever killed chrissy, you were scared he'd gotten caught by someone else who wasn't going to think twice about putting a bullet in his head or beating him unconscious.
but he wasn't hurt in any way physically that you could tell. mentally was another story but physically, he was safe and in your arms and you were flooded with relief.
you pulled your face away from where you'd buried it in the crook of his neck to get a good look at him. the cool, wet lines you felt on your cheeks let you know you'd been crying.
"you are okay, right?"
he nodded. "yeah, but chrissy…"
"you don't have to talk about it. we know."
this time, he shook his head. "no. no, you don't." you hated how his lower lip trembled. "and you wouldn't believe me if i told you what happened. no one would."
max spoke up confidently. "try us."
that was when you learned all about what steve, robin, and the kids had endured over the past few years and what eddie had gone through the previous night. and now as you reached for your keys on the hook, the bracelet eddie had given you slipped down your wrist a bit, revealing the imprinted memory of the bats that tried to kill you when you were down there.
you ignored the thought as you took the keys and made your way to your car.
you hadn't driven it since the day everything happened. everything that you'd had nightmares about. everything you never wished upon anyone, even your greatest enemies.
"eddie!" you and dustin both shouted at the boy. he'd started up the makeshift rope—sheets and pillowcases that dustin had tied together previously—but then he backed down.
"what are you doing?" dustin inquired, but you knew deep down what decision he was making. he had talked the whole time since chrissy died about how he always ran away when disaster struck and was really beating himself up about it. he wasn't going to do it this time. he was going back in.
"eddie, no! stop!" dustin continued to shout. you were already climbing back up the rope as eddie kicked away the mattress on his side.
"i'm buying more time," he filled you two in. his eyes locked with yours when he muttered a short, "i'm sorry," before slashing the rope and running out of the trailer in the upside down.
he didn't even see that you'd caught yourself by holding onto the edge of the opening.
"dustin, push me up," you ordered, swinging your feet for him to use to propel you into the other dimension. you weren't going to fight eddie on not running away this time, but you'd be damned if you were going to be by his side as he did.
the fifteen-year-old wasted no time in coming to your aid. he'd learned over the course of the past few days that you meant business especially when it came to eddie.
you'd manuvered yourself to have most of your body in the upside down and your head in the original dimension. you looked to dustin one last time.
"you stay here, alright? we have this. you just wait here."
for you, it wasn't a request. you were telling him what to do before you worked on lowering yourself gently onto the ground. there was a little sting that shot up your leg when you landed, but it was easy to ignore. once you checked to make sure you had your spear and shield, you were out and running after eddie who was biking away followed by a demobat swarm.
it was hard to get close to him considering you were on foot and he was biking as hard as he could, but then, he stopped and so did your heart.
"no," you mumbled to yourself before trying to gain some speed. "eddie!"
he couldn't hear you. you knew that, but you were desperate. you couldn't lose him. you knew he wouldn't be able to stay in hawkins after everything, but you were prepared to follow him wherever. he was your everything. you felt like you were nothing without him.
as your feet led you to him, you watched him stab and swing at the bats that circled around him like a tornado. he managed to get some of them, but he was far too outnumbered and they used that to their advantage. quickly, they had him restrained with their tails and attacked at his sides. the sound of his screams pained you to hear.
when you finally did reach him, all the bats had dropped to the ground, seemingly unconscious. you would've been more curious about the miracle that was if you weren't so worried about eddie.
"eddie, eddie," you called out when you reached his side. sitting down next to him, you pulled his head into your lap and ran a hand over his bandana. the sight of him in this state made you feel nauseous. "oh god, eddie."
"bad, huh?" your teary eyes snapped up to his and you shook your head.
"no," your voice betrayed you with a quiver, "you're gonna be fine." he didn't believe you one bit, but he liked to hold onto your hope for him. "we just gotta get you to a hospital, okay?"
he gave you the faintest of nods. "okay."
"you gotta help me a little bit," you told him when you tried to pull him up, "come on."
"i think i just… i think i just need a second, okay?" while you didn't have the time to waste, you didn't want to make him hurt more than he already was. you just hoped steve, robin, and nancy would be back soon to help you get him home.
"okay." eddie coughed a little before his equally teary eyes met yours.
"i didn't run away this time, right?"
that elicited a sob from your body while you shook your head. "no, no, no." your fingers pushed any stray or straggling hairs away from his face. "you didn't run."
"you're gonna have to keep an eye out for those little sheep of mine for me, okay?"
"eddie," you sighed.
you didn't like how he was talking like this was the end for him. it wasn't. you couldn't let that happen. you could save him. you just had to get him out of here. where the hell are steve, nancy, and robin? just one of them should be enough to help you.
"say it," he started, "please."
"i-" you took in a shaky breath and squeezed your eyes shut. "i'll look after them."
"good. we're gonna graduate together, you know? and then, we're gonna get the hell out of hawkins, find a place together, i'll do my own thing with music and you can do whatever you want to with your gap year before you go to school. i think it's finally my year, our year."
you listened intently while the tears continued to endlessly stream down your cheeks.
"you know i was gonna marry you."
you sobbed before speaking. "you still can."
eddie smiled and reached up to run his thumb across your cheek, pushing your tears to the side. it was useless. they were replaced as soon as he moved the old ones.
"i love you so much, my daring enchantress." you let out a tearful laugh at the name you hadn't heard since your first date. you tried not to think about how this was probably the last time you'd ever hear him say those words again.
"i love you too, my hero." earlier, eddie had mentioned how he wasn't a hero, but his actions refuted that. he was a hero and no one would ever truly know the extent of it.
eddie's lips pulled up into a small smile before he started to cough again.
"eddie…" you whispered, watching his coughs turn into him choking. he stopped a short moment later and dread filled your stomach when he stopped moving. "eddie?"
he didn't respond, only continued to stare blankly at you.
"eddie? eddie! eddie, no! eddie, please! eddie," you continued as you shook his body gently.
he couldn't leave you. he couldn't. not yet. not ever. you needed him. your hands cupped his cheeks while your eyes searched his eyes for any movement.
he remained still.
"no," you stated, sobs and cries spilling from your lips. leaning forward, you pressed your lips to his forehead as a final goodbye before mumbling against his sweaty skin, "i'm sorry. i'm sorry. i'm so sorry, eddie."
you didn't even know what you were apologizing for, but you were certain there was more you could've done to prevent this.
you pulled into steve's driveway and turned off the engine. looking down to take off your seatbelt, you noticed how your shirt was wet before bringing your hands to your face, your fingertips coming back with water on them as well.
you hadn't cried about it since you left the upside down. in your mind, it still didn't feel real. but when you looked over to the passenger seat and saw the guitar pick necklace you'd taken with you when you came back peeking out from below your bookbag, it really hit you.
eddie should be here. he should be here with you. he should be here, holding you while you cry, not being the source of your tears. he doesn't exist anymore and that thought alone is so difficult for you to fathom. it was finally setting in and you hated it.
sobs filled the car as that deep pain in your chest you felt when he died in your arms returned. you wished you'd never gone into his trailer on that rainy night. you wished you'd never agreed to go with him to the diner. you wished you never let him in as much as you did. you wished he was only the town freak to you, not your soulmate.
your hands came up to your chest, trying to lessen the pain you felt, but it was no use. it only increased and it became harder to breathe. the worst part was that the one person you wanted wasn't here anymore and that just made it hurt worse.
you didn't even notice that your car door had opened until you felt someone's hands on you. in any other situation, you would've freaked out, but they handled you with such care and you'd recognize the watch on his wrist anywhere.
"hey, hey, look at me. breathe with me," steve's voice broke through your thoughts momentarily. he'd turned your body to face him where he was crouched down in front of you.
once you had calmed a little, you felt yourself getting all worked up again and your face crumbled when your thoughts resurfaced.
"steve, he's gone. not like he'll be back, gone forever," you sobbed. steve's hands held yours as he attempted to soothe you. he knew this was inevitable, that everything would hit you like a ton of bricks, and that you'd be in shambles. that didn't mean he knew exactly how to help you though.
the closest he had ever felt to this kind of heartache was nancy breaking his heart, but nancy was still alive and there was a small possibility of them rekindling their old relationship. that was nowhere near what you were experiencing.
not only did eddie die, but you had to watch it. you had to watch the life leave his eyes, unable to do anything about it. you had to do this all while experiencing the upside down's worst for the first time. you didn't deserve this. no one did.
you were hurting deeply and all steve had to offer was support and comfort.
"come here," he whispered and you were quick to close the space between you to wrap your arms around him. he didn't feel as good as eddie nor did his smell put you at ease as much as eddie's. but you had to learn that eddie wasn't here. he wasn't coming back. it was just going to be you and your friends.
you didn't know how you were going to live in a world without your charming knight in shining leather.
but, you'd have to find a way.
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✧ cherry hearts ✧ eddie munson x fem!reader
summary: reader runs into eddie at the hideout on a tuesday. conversation, confessions, and cannabis-fueled touching ensues.
an: this is maybe the most self-indulgent thing i’ve ever written. it ends abruptly bc i've never written smut and i got scared lol.
cw: 18+ (minors dni), byers!reader, drug use (marijuana), alcohol mention, making out/heavy petting but no smut, reader has dated most of the older kids (steve, billy, nancy, robin, chrissy), reader is in her edgy phase, there is a small amount of billy sympathy and i will justify it if needed, reader is 19/eddie is 20, let me now if i missed anything.
word count: 4.9k
Moving back home to Hawkins by yourself was less than ideal, even if you were too proud to admit it out loud. You’d complained about the move to Lenora Hills since the day you’d found out about it. You’d driven your mother crazy with your protests, empty threats to hitchhike east, until she’d agreed to let you fly back to Indiana, with the non-negotiable condition that you would call home every Sunday, and that you would be staying with the Wheelers.
As welcoming and as warm as the Wheelers had been, moving in just before Christmas made you feel out of place. Mrs. Wheeler had run to Macy’s to make sure you had presents under the tree, and there was a new place setting at the dining room table. They had done everything to make you feel at home, but you still opted to get out of the house as much as you could, so they had time to celebrate as a family.
You’d sit at the park and write a letter to Will or El, or loiter at the video store during Steve and Robin’s shifts. Sometimes you’d get lucky and use the phone to talk to Billy for a few hours. When all else failed, you were never opposed to helping Max and her mom fix up their trailer.
On Christmas Eve, though, you’d finally run out of luck. All your friends had plans with their families, and you knew the Wheelers were home watching holiday movies. You ended up at the Hideout out of necessity, and the fact that they didn’t check ID was an added bonus.
You sat at the bar, sipping a bottom-shelf vodka cranberry and doodling on a napkin. You tuned out the live music for the most part until a low, honeyed voice introduced the next band.
“We’re Corroded Coffin.”
Oh, god.
A moody bassline filled the bar, and your eyes rolled back. God, what the hell was Eddie Munson doing here?
You’d only talked to the guy a handful of times, mostly during your sophomore year. After everything that had happened with Will, you’d started having nightmares. Nothing seemed to help until Chrissy had gotten you a sample from Eddie’s supply. You’d met up with him in the woods once a month or so, until you’d started going steady with Steve. He tried to stay away from that stuff while he’d been on the basketball team, and you had wanted to be supportive.
You never really gave Eddie Munson a second thought outside of your deals. He was a year older than you, and the closest link you had to him nowadays was Chrissy or Mike. Your paths never seemed to cross, but it had to be his band playing tonight.
You tried to keep you head down during their set, to focus on anything other than Eddie’s low voice underneath the heavy instrumentals, and you cursed yourself for not thinking to bring your Walkman. The bar was loud enough with its patrons alone, but the extra noise made it hard to even think. By the end of their set, your nails had dug little half-moons into your palms.
“Can I get a jack and coke, and another round for the lady?”
The man speaking to the bartender talked with his hands. His forehead was covered in a thin sheen of sweat, and his curly hair was pulled back in a messy knot.
You tried to keep your shoulders steady as your breaths quickened. He took the seat next to you, and you watched from the corner of your eye as he propped an elbow onto the bar, resting his chin in his hand, as he used the steel toe of his boot to spin your stool toward him. “You’re Steve Harrington’s girlfriend, aren’t you?”
Eddie Munson didn’t even remember you.
“We broke up a couple of months ago, actually.” You hoped that the tremor in your voice wasn’t as noticeable as you thought it was. You supposed you should be insulted – sure, you hadn’t been friends, but you and Eddie had met several times. He didn’t remember you at all?
Eddie’s mouth twitched up at the corner. “Back with Hargrove, then?”
Out of all the people in this town, it had to be Eddie Munson.
“He’s in California with his mom.”
“Buckley? Or the Wheeler girl?” You stiffened when he said that, ready to dash to the door if you needed to, but his smile was genuine enough that you stayed put. “Relax, secret’s safe with me. I’ve got nobody to tell.”
You took another sip of your drink, trying to drown the butterflies that fluttered every time he smiled. “I’m not seeing anyone right now, actually.”
“Whaat?” The word was drawn out and incredulous. He leaned closer to you and you mimicked him without thinking. “Pretty girl like you? Don’t you have your pick of the litter?”
“No one’s in it for the long run, I guess.” You tried to bite your tongue, and failed. “What about you? Still screwing Chrissy Cunningham?”
He grinned widely, eyes crinkling. “Chrissy’s mostly into girls these days, sadly. But I’d be happy to remind her that you’re single again, if you want.”
So Chrissy had told him about the two of you. “I doubt you even know who I am, Munson.”
Somehow your faces were just inches apart, and when he whispered your name you could feel the heat of his breath. “Y/N Byers, everybody knows who you are.” He let the words linger for a few moments, and you couldn’t bring yourself to break the eye contact. Your body leaned closer of its own accord, and your noses were nearly touching when he spoke again, widening the gap. “But it did take me a second to recognize you. You look different.”
You let out a breathy laugh. “I already wasn’t fitting in in California. Figured it couldn’t hurt to change it up a little bit.” You crossed your legs, letting them rest on the bars of Eddie’s barstool. If you moved an inch, your legs would have been touching.
“So that explains the tan and the short skirt.” He gave you a once-over, and you told yourself that you were only imagining the way his eyes lingered on the tops of your thighs. “But I was talking more about the stripes in your hair and the pretty tattoos on your chest.”
You felt heat rise into your cheeks. You had managed to fit an entire adolescence’s worth of rebellion into nine short weeks, dyeing your hair and putting a silver bar through your tongue. Your mom had thrown a fit when you came home with the ink on your collarbones, a dozen small bats flying toward your sternum.
“Needed a bigger change,” you finally said, moving to cross your legs the other way. Your knee bumped lightly against his thigh, and his eyes snapped back up to yours. They were a warm shade of brown, and darker than they had been a few minutes ago. “Do you like them?”
His arm reached out, and he rested his wrist on your knee. He was clearly showing off the tattoo below the crook of his arm, but all you could focus on were the cold rings touching your leg. “I think you have good taste.” He gripped your leg a little tighter, and the bats on his arm rippled with the movement. “Great minds think alike.” He looked at you for a long time, eyes flickering from your eyes to your mouth to the bats on your chest, and he was quiet for a long time. You were excruciatingly aware of every millimeter of your skin that was touching his.
“So why’d you end it with Harrington?”
Whatever you thought was going to come out of Eddie’s mouth, it wasn’t that. “I, uh – We didn’t know how to make it work long distance. Actually, I didn’t know how, I guess. Steve, he wanted to try, but… honestly, I kind of wanted to leave this whole place behind. That didn’t work out, obviously.” The words came out rushed and choppy, but Eddie listened attentively. “Steve’s perfect, it’s probably better that I let him down sooner rather than later. He doesn’t need me holding him back. I can’t quite seem to stop hurting the people I date.”
Eddie ran a comforting thumb along your knee. “Do you wanna talk about it? I’m a good shoulder to cry on.” You didn’t doubt it. His shoulders were broad, and the leather of his jacket looked worn and soft. “I’m also a good distraction, if you wanna get out of here.”
You didn’t ask him to elaborate. You could use a distraction, even if it was just a quiet ride back to the Wheelers. “I would love to get out of here.”
✧✧✧
Feeling soft and comfortable, you stretched your legs out onto the dashboard, letting your head loll back against the headrest. The windows were rolled up, and you stared at the swirls of smoke that filled the van. Eddie tapped your arm, and you blindly grabbed the joint. You took a deep breath and held it for a moment, ready to exhale toward the ceiling, but his warm hand gripped your jaw and turned you toward him, letting the smoke wash over him. The center console put about a foot of space in between the two of you, and you were close enough to see his glazed eyes in the dim glow of the parking lot lights.
His hand squeezed your jaw lightly. “You’re so pretty. Why are you so pretty?”
You laughed, voice rough with smoke. “You’re stoned.” The whole situation started to seem a little funny. It was Christmas Eve, your family was two thousand miles away, and you were hotboxing with Eddie “The Freak” Munson. “God, my mom would kill me if she knew what I was doing right now.”
His hand dropped from your chin to the console, and he twisted his rings with a smile. “You never got caught when you used to smoke?”
“I was careful! Never when she was home, and never in the house if I could avoid it. Didn’t want Will thinking it had something to do with him. Jonathan probably caught on eventually, but he wouldn’t rat me out.” You passed the joint back to Eddie, who cracked his window to tap off some of the ash. “Plus, he’s no better. He’s got a new friend who deals, and I don’t think either of them have been sober since Halloween.”
“Why would your brother think you were smoking because of him?”
You shrugged, fiddling with the lever on your seat until you were sitting up a little straighter. “Because I was, I guess. Every time I closed my eyes, I just saw that body they’d pulled out of the quarry. I never thought that I might outlive either of my brothers, and it freaked me out. I was a mess. Mom was going crazy, I shut down. Jonathan had to plan the funeral by himself, which I’m going to spend the rest of my life apologizing for. Even when we found Will… I couldn’t get over it. I started buying from you because Chrissy thought it might help with the nightmares.”
Eddie adjusted his seat to be level with yours, and mimed a small bow. “Glad to be of service. I’ll try not to be hurt that you found another dealer.” He rolled the rest of the windows down a bit, and you reveled in the feeling of cold air entering your lungs.
“As if. This is the first time I’ve smoked in over a year.”
“Harrington make you quit?” Eddie reached into the back seat and grabbed a beer, offering it to you. You wrinkled your nose and shook your head, fishing a water out of your bag.
“Nah, he wouldn’t do that. But he was the reason, yeah. I tried to be the supportive girlfriend during basketball season, and that was hard to do when I was always high. Not that I was a great girlfriend either way.” You drummed your fingers along the plastic bottle in your hands. “I don’t wanna bore you, Munson. You don’t need to listen to my whining.”
Eddie took a swig of his beer and offered you the joint. His index finger brushed against yours, and you fought back a shiver.
“You say that like there’s something else I’d rather be doing,” he said. “I don’t know what you think my social life is like, but sharing a spliff with Y/N Byers is the most exciting thing that’s ever happened to me.”
“Bullshit.”
“I’m serious! If my middle school self could see me now, he’d be so proud. I had the biggest crush on you back then. Remember when we found out we had to repeat a grade?”
You threw your head back and groaned. Eddie had been held back twice: he was a second-time senor, and he’d gone through eighth grade twice. You’d only been held back once, in the seventh grade, but it was a sore subject for you. The fact that you’d be graduating at 19 bugged you to no end. “That was on a technicality!”
Eddie laughed, and the warm sound filled the van with ease. “Whatever the reason, that was the first time I noticed you. Decided you were the girl of my dreams, yadda yadda yadda.”
You studied him in disbelief. “You never even talked to me until Chrissy introduced us.”
“I never said I wasn’t a coward!”
You hummed in response, reclining your seat and letting your eyes slip closed. You focused on the cold breeze, the hum of the streetlights, the scent of Eddie’s cologne.
“Can I ask you something personal?”
You rolled onto your side to face him, curious. “I guess so,” you said before pressing what was left of the joint to your mouth.
Eddie ran his tongue along the seam of his lips as if he were searching for the right words. “Are you still in love with Harrington?”
You inhaled quickly in surprise, sputtering out smoke. Eddie watched bemusedly while you recovered, nudging your water toward you. “You okay there, angel?”
You felt your cheeks go hot. “Just wasn’t expecting the question.” You drank your water in small sips. “No. No, I’m not in love with Steve. I love Steve, Steve is the best, but I think we both finally realize we’re not good together. Not as a couple, anyway.”
Eddie nodded, looking thoughtful. “What about your other exes? Still into any of them?”
You narrowed your eyes. “You’re nosy. How many people do you think I’ve dated?”
“Five,” he answered promptly. “People talk, I listen. What can I say, I love gossip. Are you gonna answer the question?”
“It’s two! Where on earth did you hear five?”
Eddie tipped his chin down, looking at you knowingly. “Two you told your parents about. I thought we were being honest with each other, Byers.”
You kept your eyes locked with him, doing the calculations in your head of how trustworthy Eddie Munson really was. As far as you could tell, he didn’t have much to gain by outing you. Eventually, you caved. “If we’re being honest. I don’t really count Nancy. Being in love with your straight best friend is more embarrassing than anything. We kissed three times and I don’t think it meant anything to her.” You shrugged. “But, no, I’m not in love with Nancy anymore. Robin and I never used the L-word, and me and Chrissy are very happy in the friends-with-benefits stage.”
“And Billy?”
You didn’t like to talk about your feelings for Billy. It felt safer to leave them unspoken. But, you reasoned, your words would never leave this van. “I’m probably gonna love Billy for the rest of my life, but he’s going to be so much happier if her never comes back to Hawkins. ‘If you love someone, set them free,’ and all that shit.” You passed the now charred joint to Eddie, who took a quick drag before flicking the filter out the gap in his window. “We still talk as often as we can, but it’s not the same. I just need to move on.”
“What if he moved back?” Eddie took a deep drink from his bottle. “What would happen?”
You mulled the question over, your mind foggy. “I’d cry. I’d probably hug him. And I’d beg him to leave.”
Eddie whistled lowly. “Want him to stay gone that bad, huh?”
“I think everyone I care about should get the hell out of Hawkins before they end up dead.”
A heavy silence rolled over the two of you, and you scolded yourself for bringing down the mood. Here you were, playing twenty questions with one of the coolest guys you’d ever met, and you were lamenting the loss of your ex and the curse of your hometown. “Sorry.”
He smiled at you, stretching his legs back as he moved his seat back. “What for? I asked.”
“What about you? Any tragic love stories?”
“Oh, too many to count.”
“Oh, I’m sure. I pity all the ladies who’ve had their hearts broken by Eddie Munson.”
“What can I say?” He looked at you through heavy lids. “I drive the girls crazy.”
Your inhibitions were lowered and you had to fight back a whimper. “I don’t doubt it, Munson.”
His smile left you breathless, even though you’d seen it several times tonight. “Really? Didn’t think I was your type.”
“Oh, fuck off. You’ve been flirting with me since the bar.”
“I never denied that.”
“So what is this?” All the questions you’d been wanting to ask came spilling out. “Reliving childhood memories? Trying to sell? A holiday hookup? What do you want from me, Eddie?”
“Do you want me to be honest?”
You blinked. “Yes.”
“Completely, totally honest?”
“Yes.”
“I’ve had a thing for you since middle school. I knew you weren’t interested, so I kept my distance. I wanted to ask you out a couple years ago when we’d meet in the woods, but I never had the guts.” He tossed his empty beer bottle into the back seat, and you cringed at the sound it made. “Then you were with Hargrove. Then Harrington. Then you moved away. Mike told me you’d moved back, and I was going to stop by to see you, but… yeah, I guess I’m still kind of a pussy.” He laughed to himself, and looked over at you.
Your brain had shorted out somewhere around “middle school,” and the only thing you could really focus on was the way Eddie’s hair fell over his shoulders like silk. “And now that you know all my emotional baggage? Still think I’m crush-worthy?”
“Still want me to be honest?” You nodded, and he grinned crookedly. “I think you’re perfect. I think you’re too good for this shitty town. I think I could spend all night talking about how fucking cool it is that you’re even hanging out with me, and it goes without saying that I think you’re beautiful.”
You were leaning toward him now, silently cursing the center console that separated you from him. “You could still say it. If you wanted to.”
Eddie hesitated, searching your face for anything that indicated you were kidding. You stared back at him, eyes wide and waiting. “You’re so fucking pretty. I’ve always thought so, you know. You’ve got those eyes and that mouth and your body…” He scanned you up and down and drank in every inch he could see. The way you were angling yourself toward him gave him a clear view down your sweater. “I’m gonna stop myself there.”
“Don’t.” You were as close to him as you could be without tumbling into his lap. “Please keep talking.”
The hungry look in your eyes made his body go weak. “Come on, Byers, are you really gonna make me say it?”
You nodded. “Please.”
“You’re pretty much the only thing I’ve jacked off to since I was a freshman. I’m insanely jealous of anyone who’s been lucky enough to fuck you, and I think I’d be willing to commit arson if it meant your let me just touch you.”
His words drew a whine from your lips. “Can you please kiss me?”
Eddie’s hands were on you immediately, lifting you by the hips and maneuvering you onto his lap. You let out a sigh of relief at finally being able to touch him, and your body moved of its own accord, grinding your hips down onto his. Eddie groaned, overwhelmed by the fact that he was getting everything he’d ever wanted. “Fuck, honey. I thought you just wanted a kiss.”
“And I thought you wanted me.” The pout would have been evident in your voice even if Eddie couldn’t see it on your pretty lips. “Come on, Munson, thought you wanted everything.”
“God, baby. Just let me kiss you first, okay?” He kept one of his large hands on your hip, moving the other up to cup your jaw and guide your lips to his. You returned his kiss with fervor, and Eddie had to slide his hand around to the back of your neck to hold you still, biting lightly at your bottom lip and swallowing the little noises that escaped you. “Easy, sweetheart. There’s no rush, hm?” He pressed his lips to the corner of your mouth and started leaving a trail of kisses along your jawline and down your throat, sinking his teeth in just to hear you gasp.
“Oh, don’t tease me,” you breathed out, voice catching every time his mouth latched onto a new spot on your neck.
He left a kiss on your pulse point before licking up to the shell of your ear. “Actually,” he whispered, “I think you like it.” He guided your lips back to his, and you couldn’t help but let out a whine at the way he kissed you, deeply, overwhelming all your senses. You moved your hips again, and he pulled back with a groan. “Please let me take you home.” Your breath caught in your throat, and he was immediately covering your chest in open-mouthed kisses. “Please let me take you back to my place, I can barely see you in here.” Eddie gripped your waist tightly, holding you against him. “Plus, the heat in here is busted and you deserve better than a quick fuck in a cold van.”
You let out a breathy laugh. “You’re just afraid you won’t be able to keep it hard in the cold.”
“You wound me, Byers.”
You crawled back into the passenger seat, swatting Eddie’s hand away when he reached out to smack your ass. “Easy, Munson.”
“Thought you wanted to give me everything, baby. I don’t get to touch?”
“Get us to a real bed and you can touch it, ‘kay?”
“Deal, sweetheart.” The van creaked as he shifted it into drive, giving you a few moments to put your seat up and buckle your seatbelt before he peeled onto the street.
“Your uncle works nights, right?” you asked, shimmying to readjust your mini skirt. Eddie watched you out of the corner of his eye, making a note that the skirt’s zipper was on the side, not the back.
“Yep. You sure the Wheelers aren’t expecting you back tonight?”
“Mhmm. I’ve spent most nights since I’ve been back at Robin’s anyway, they’ll probably assume I’m with her. As long as I’m back for breakfast it should be fine.”
Eddie tapped out a beat on the steering wheel. “Since you made me spill my guts, can I ask you something?” He waited for your nod. “Do you and Robin ever – ah, never mind.” You might not had given it a second thought if he hadn’t gone red in the face, reaching up to rub his neck.
“What were you going to ask? Do Robin and I ever…” You looked at his blushing cheeks and connected the dots. “Eddie! You pervert!”
“Hey! It was just a question! You don’t have to answer it.”
You easily could have refused to answer and the subject would have been dropped. That was definitely what you had been about to do, when you noticed Eddie’s left hand stealthily readjusting the front of his jeans. Oh. “We do. We have. Quite a few times since I’ve been back.” Gauging his reaction, the way his knuckles tightened around the steering wheel, you continued. “So do me and Chrissy, if you were curious.”
The van swerved slightly. “Shit,” Eddie muttered, correcting it. “That’s fucking hot.”
You laughed. “Tell me about it. Fucking the head cheerleader really is an ego boost, isn’t it?”
Eddie nodded, and the two of you were laughing when the road turned to rubble as he turned into the trailer park.
“Welcome to my humble home,” he quipped, the van jerking as he pulled into his lot. You watched with a smile while he parked and got out of the van, jogging to the passenger side to open your door before you could do it yourself. “M’lady.” He bowed at the waist, extending his hand.
“Corny move, Munson.” You took his hand and helped you down the high step-off.
“You love it.” He moved his hand to your waist and struggled to unlock the trailer with one hand. “Shoes by the door, make yourself comfortable, Byers.”
You slipped off your shoes and let Eddie guide you to the back room. The door was plastered with posters and doodles and the words “THE FREAK” written in spray paint, with a crown above it.
“Nice place,” you commented as you stepped into what you deduced to be Eddie’s bedroom. The walls were just as covered as the door, a collage of blown-up metal band logos and a few framed autographs. There were clothes strewn around and it seemed like his main method of storage may have been shoe boxes, but the room was surprisingly tidy. The bed was even made, although a little sloppily.
“Ha ha ha.” Eddie feigned a laugh, reaching out to strum the guitar mounted over his mirror. “Very funny.”
“I’m serious,” you said, setting your purse on the floor beside the bed before sitting down on the foot of the mattress. “Better than my dad’s old place. At least this feels like a home.” You patted the bed beside you. “You gonna join me or what?”
Eddie grinned widely and shrugged off his leather jacket and denim vest underneath, tossing them onto a chair. The white tee shirt he wore was almost indecently tight, and you tried not to stare. “You’re impatient.” He grabbed a small metal box off his bedside table and sat cross-legged on the floor in front of you. “Did you wanna smoke some more? Or are you out of practice?”
“I will if you are.” You crossed your legs at the ankles, overtly aware that Eddie was eye-level with your thighs. The dim lamp in the corner of the room cast shadows over his face and his eyes twinkled when he smiled up at you. “You’re so handsome.” The words slipped out so easily and thoughtlessly that you almost reconsidered your decision to keep smoking.
Eddie looked up from the joint he was rolling and grinned widely. “Flatterer,” he said, leaning forward to place a quick kiss to your knee, delighting in the way your face went pink. “I can’t wait to fuck you. You’re gonna look so pretty underneath me.”
“You have got to stop talking to me like that,” you whispered, keeping your eyes on his large hands and long fingers, and the pretty silver rings that adorned them. “It’s not fair.”
Still smiling, he placed the joint between his teeth and cupped his hand around it, flicking his lighter a few times until the embers stayed lit. He inhaled deeply before sitting up on his knees and leaning forward to press his lips to yours, breathing the smoke out steadily into your lungs. You gripped his shoulders to keep yourself balanced, and you quickly grew dizzy from the smoke and the sensation. Eddie broke away so you could both get some air, and you found yourself chasing his lips desperately.
Eddie watched you, the way the smoke slipped out from between your pink lips and how your skirt bunched up at your thighs. He wanted to take his time with you, worship the body he’d been fantasizing about for years. He didn’t count on you being so needy, so responsive. He stubbed out the joint, getting to his feet, and you looked up at him with wide eyes.
“So, how do you wanna do this, honey?” He slotted a leg in between your thighs, and it took all your focus to listen to him rather than move your hips against him. “I can be nice, or I can be mean, or I can be a little of both. Whatever you want.”
“Both,” you breathed out, the word coming out a whisper.
He gripped your jaw, and you swooned. “Speak up, sweetheart.”
“Both,” you repeated, louder this time. “Please.”
“’Please,’ huh?” Eddie ran his thumb over your lower lip. “I like that."
#eddie munson smut#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson#eddie munson fic#eddie munson x you#christos writes#5kfic#stranger things
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
Thank you so much @ladyofthenoodle for tagging me! I love being part of things 🥺 <3
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
On my main account there are 37 publicly posted
2. What's your total AO3 word count?
Main account has 207,377, but if I included the other account and my unpublished stuff it's 280,000+
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Mostly Miraculous Ladybug, but I have dabbled in others!
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
honestly it was embarrassing to list these out :'):'):')
Out of the Closet
Dropping All Pretenses
On Open Secret
electrify me, i'm dying to burn
knowing you
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Most of the time I do! I dont tend to respond to rude comments anymore and sometimes I dont know what to say, but I try to respond to most comments!! I feel so lucky to receive any of them, I just want the commenter to know how much I appreciate them <3<3 There has been at least one time when I was so overwhelmed with a lovely comment that I never responded because I just liked looking at it so much 🙈 but that person was also a friend of mine so I did express to them privately how much their comment meant to me
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
For published fic, definitely whistle stop. I have written a lot of other angsty stuff though that will never see the light of day </3
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
I feel like after a certain point, they're all kind of equally happy in their endings, but I guess live chat? I dont know though, I really dont tend to reread my fics
8. Do you get hate on fics?
ajskdljkl yes I have gotten hate on fics before
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Nope!
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
I dont think I've written anything that would classify as a crossover
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Nope!
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Yes! I don't think the translation is up anymore but it was like my second or third fic and I was over the moon that someone liked it enough to put in the time to translate it!
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Not seriously. I've been part of a few projects where we were going to cowrite a fic together that never ended up getting finished and I've set up a document to cowrite a fic with a friend that we never did anything with :/ I'd love to co-write a fic though, I think it's so cool when people collaborate like that!
14. What's your all-time favourite ship?
Lovesquare and original ot4 of Alyadrininette <3
15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?
As far as published works from my main account there are a lot :') but the one that hurts the most is probably Where the Devils Are rip
16. What are your writing strengths?
I don't really have an answer for this!
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
asjdjkl if I dwell on this too long I will never write another sentence so I'm also going to skip this one!
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
I think it's really cool when other people who are multilingual do it! I've dropped a word or two in when it felt right, but otherwise I personally stay away from writing it because I lack the knowledge to do it justice. I do sometimes make up languages for magic purposes, though!
19. First fandom you wrote for?
First fandom I published fanfic for was Miraculous Ladybug!
20. Favourite fic you've ever written?
asjdklf ahhhh I have no response to this because I dont reread my writing. I think probably the closest thing I have to a favorite at any point in time is whichever one I wrote the most recently
tagging: @rosekasa @marimbles @picayunearts @emsylcatac @anna-scribbles @talkstoself (no pressure to anyone tagged if you dont want to do it of course, I'd just always love to see more stuff about your writing!) and anyone else who'd like to participate! I know it can be kind of sad if no one tags you in one of these things and you wanted to do it so just let me know and I will add you <3
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Get to Know the Fic Writer
Thank you for the tag @leggywillow 🥰
Gosh I think I did this last year? Things have changed a bit!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
43
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
463,350
3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
In the Shattering of Things (Cullen x f!Trevelyan, Hawke x f!Trevelyan) 141
The Boy Who Talked Too Much (Alistair x f!Cousland) 67
Some Kind of Witchcraft (Cullen x f!Trevelyan) 59
Unvarnished (Blackwall x f!Trevelyan) 57
The Protestations of the Commander's Bed (Cullen x f!Trevelyan) 46
4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Always! Oh man alwayyyys. I am so grateful for anyone who takes that extra moment to share something they liked or a thought that popped into their head. Truly. It's a special kind of reader that leaves comments. They really are the fuel that keep me going! Especially on my long fic I feel like I'm getting to know some of my readers and I love the discussions I've gotten into about my blorbo and her interactions with canon characters. OR just canon characters!
5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
Probably Fractures. I wrote it especially for Whumptober and in it Cullen's obsession with Samson led to a throwdown in Emprise that nearly left him dead and Rose is understandably at her wits end with him. They have 'make up sex' that does nothing to resolve any of the feelings of betrayal and abandonment and anger that Rose feels.
6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?
Probably The Commander, the Tevinter, and a Bottle of Lightning a Cullen & Dorian, Cullen POV fic where Cullen's romance with Rose Trevelyan seems to finally be coming to a head at long last.
7. Do you write crossovers?
Not yet! Probably won't though.
8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?
The closest is maybe vocal dislike of an original character. He's a competing love interest though, so I get it. People have their preferences and want to nudge me a certain way.
9. Do you write smut?
LOLLLL yes. 4 of my top 5 above are explicitly smuts and my long fic has 4 at this point. My friend @nirikeehan says "be the smut you wish to see in the world" so I try to write joyful, consensual, authentic feeling smuts that also capture the awkwardness/silliness/normality of sex. My hope is that someone reading it who isn't quite experienced with this stuff gets to see a really positive, realistic portrayal.
10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not to my knowledge.
11. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Nope
12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Not yet!
13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?
I can't show my whole ass in the midst of a multiship long fic, so I will keep quiet on this one 🤐
14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
A Splinter of Light (my Rose and Dorian get stranded in the future during In Hushed Whispers Nightmare!AU fic)
15. What are your writing strengths?
Believable dialogue and banter, authentically drawn characters readers can root for, lively descriptions
16. What are your writing weaknesses?
PLOT. It's just always been a struggle for me. World building too. LISTEN. There's a reason I'm writing fan fic LOL. Though I recently got Scapple (from the Scrivener makers) and it has been a game changer! I'm using it for my long fic and my other major WIP Kiss Me Moonstruck right now.
17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
I've done it for a few select lines during Wicked Eyes Wicked Hearts, mostly to underscore how bad Hawke is at speaking Orlesian. But generally I will just note when a character is speaking in a new language.
18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?
Dragon Age! I stumbled into it a smidge over a year ago (after playing for 9ish years) and love it so much!
19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?
Cullen/Bethany Hawke
20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?
Oh man, barring my long fic which is my baby and still in progress it would probably have to be my new Cullen POV fic Thirst that digs into the lead up to his crisis during the Perseverance quest.
But Kiss Me Moonstruck is my Hawke x f!Trevelyan MatchmakingMoms!AU WIP set during DA2, Act 2 and mannnn nothing makes me smile and laugh like this fic. I can't wait to publish it!
Tagging @delicatefade, @bluewren, @samseabxrn, @rowanisawriter, @greypetrel, @nirikeehan, @spicywarl0ck, @monocytogenes
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AO3 Tag Game!
Starting a new post because the old one was getting a bit long!! I was tagged by @mahpotatoequeen <3333
How many works do you have on AO3? 21! Mostly oneshots and one long(ish) fic.
What’s your total AO3 word count? 137,409
How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they? One! Two if you count the book and the show as separate fandoms. But it's always been The Mysterious Benedict Society so far. I'd love to write for other fandoms someday, probably Good Omens, but this is where I feel comfortable with for now, both in terms of knowing the characters/story and the tight-knit fandom :D
Top five fics by kudos:
The Mysterious Benedict Society and the Epistolary Bullying Campaign (because of course it is. this was my first crack fic and I wrote it at 1AM when I had an exam the next day. sigh)
5PM Every Evening, On the Dot
46 Fairview St. Apartment 2A, Stonetown
Thank the Stars Above
Time and a Half
Do you respond to comments?
In theory. I love chatting with people about fics - best way to make friends honestly - and I love when authors reply to my comments on their works! In practice I haven't replied in a while, which upsets me but it's more of a time/spoons thing. If I have time and energy I'd rather spend that commenting on one of my friends' fics rather than replying to comments on one of my own fics.
What’s the fic with the angstiest ending you’ve ever written?
I really don't do angsty endings! They're not always happy, but they tend to be bittersweet or open rather than angsty, and even if everything isn't resolved, I usually try to get across that the fic is ending in the middle of a situation and that everything will be okay later (like this snippet). I think the three that come closest are Let Steep Ten Minutes, Keeping Time with Curtain's +1 section, and 46 Fairview St. where it's kind of left open whether SQ will ever go back to visit his father. But again, those don't really feel angsty, just somewhat bittersweet with the hope that things will grow and get better.
Do you write crossovers? I haven't yet, but I'd be open to it! I think it's really challenging to write a good and cohesive crossover and I'm not sure where I'd start.
Have you ever gotten hate on a fic?
Nope! Perks of being in a small fandom. I imagine it does happen but I know y'all would have my back
Do you write smut?
Definitely not for mbs. I'd be open for other fandoms but it's not really what interests me the most.
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of! I suppose someone might have fed a fic of mine into an AI writing generator which I'd personally consider a form of stealing, but I haven't heard of that happening. Please don't do that :)
Have you ever had a fic translated?
No! I've thought of trying to translate some of my own for funsies, but I'm definitely not at that level yet! Although the lovely @sophieswundergarten has made a few amazing podfics of both my fics and some other excellent fics in the mbs fandom, which I'd consider translation of a sort!
What’s your all-time favorite ship?
For mbs I'm more interested in platonic/familial connections, but I suppose I'd say Milligan/Moocho if I had to pick one? I really don't care if they're romantic or not though, I just like them together in any form that takes. For all-time I suppose I'd say Aziraphale and Crowley, though again I'm really not too picky about the nature of that, romantic or otherwise. Perks of being aroace spectrum baybe
What’s a WIP that you want to finish, but don’t think you ever will?
Never say never! But I do have a longer Curtain Wins AU buzzing around in my brain where Reynie and Sticky "join" him at the end of Book/Season 1 and then work to bring him down from the inside, without getting caught up in his manipulations. That might end up being comparable to Time and a Half in length, so maybe someday when I have an abundance of free time.
What are your writing strengths?
I think I write some banger first sentences :D especially in crack/funny fics
What are your writing weaknesses?
Too many adverbs! Also I get very easily stuck on exposition/beginning/ending/filler parts. I tend to write down the most tense/exciting moments for the fic and then the writing process stalls for the next three months.
What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fics?
For a real language, I think it can be a great opportunity to showcase a character's backstory/culture. It can also be immersive for the audience - if a character is in a foreign country where they don't speak the language, including pieces of dialogue in that language can help the audience understand how lost they're feeling (assuming the audience doesn't speak that language either)! If you're using a translation source though it can make for some pretty hilarious errors and mistranslations.
I think made-up languages absolutely fuck but I could never include one in my fic because I'd nerd out creating an entire writing, grammar, and vocab system and forget to write the actual fic.
What was the first fandom you ever wrote for?
take a wild guess
What’s your favorite fic you’ve written so far?
absolutely not. top 5:
Time and a Half
46 Fairview St
And Without It One Cannot Start Over
The Mysterious Benedict Society and the Epistolary Bullying Campaign
Keeping Time
Tagging: @binnudacademy (consider this a tag for your main, sorry about the shadowban. free molly 2k24) @ragecndybars @bi-demon-ium @trentcrimminallybeautiful (you pick which <3) @oflightningandstars and anyone else that wants to!!
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20 Questions for Fic Writers!
I was tagged by @suspendingtime. Thanks my dear. 🫶🫶 Apologies I'm a little tipsy right now haha. 🤪
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
155. Ahem, hush you. I started writing 18 months ago. When I get a new hobby, I REALLY lean into it.
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
481,485. Yup, almost half a million. Again, shhhh.
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Only Bridgerton. Look, I have my hyperfixations, ok?
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
On AO3:
In His Lap (Short Fic) 181
Temptation 177
The Lesson 155
Insatiable 149
Are We Friends? 148
Tumblr notes:
Second Son 3,436
Sonnet #29 2,199
Rescue & Ruin 1,841
Awakening 1,827
Temptation 1,788
Wattpad readers:
Innocence, 30,600
Benedict Bridgerton Regency One Shots 23,000
Kinktober 2022 collection 16,300
Anthony Bridgerton Regency One Shots 10,400
Moments 5,800
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Yes. Always. It's just wonderful to get feedback. I read and respond to every single comment. They mean the world to me, truly.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Probably No Good Advice. I ended up writing Moments multi-chapter as I (and a friend) couldn't bear the idea they didn't end up together lolol.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
All of them, tbh. I can't write an unhappy ending. Maybe the mushiest is Second Son, Moments, or It Had To Be You.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Luckily not much yet. I did get one hate anon early on. It wasn't about a specific fic, though. It said they didn't know why I had a 'please don't steal my work' disclaimer (the standard one that most writers here use) cos I was delusional that my work was worth stealing. 🤷♀️
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Yes, it's my trademark. It's rare when I don't write smut. 😬 I'm not sure what is meant by kind of smut. I've written it all, from vanilla romantic sex to kink threesomes with harnesses and double penetration lol. I haven't had a request yet that I've turned down due to sexual content.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
Not yet. The closest I've gotten is It Had To Be You, which is based on When Harry Met Sally.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Yes, sadly, it has happened quite a few times now. I was so fed up with filing copyright takedown notices that I set up a Wattpad account to try to counter it.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
No. I've been offered but have turned it down. I have no way to check that any translation would get across the nuance I aim for. So I know that may be anglo-centric, but its how I feel for now.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Not yet, but I am always threatening to lolol.
14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?
Hmm, tough one. I do love Kanthony tbh.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Benedict as a virgin. I just urghhh.... it's been a WIP for 17 months now. I just dunno why I won't finish it; I just get the feeling I won't.
16. What are your writing strengths?
I have no bloody idea. I'd prefer readers answer that tbh lol. My inclination is to say I don't have one, except perhaps a willingness to describe sex in ridiculous levels of detail? Is that a strength?
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
World building. I will do anything to shortcut it. I'll find an economical way to describe a situation e.g. she's a widow; they're old friends. Got it? Good! Let's get down to business.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I've done a smidgeon of French as I studied it for ten years. But I doubt I'd do another language tbh.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Only Bridgerton so far.
20. Favourite fic you’ve written?
Bloody hell, I have no fucking idea. It literally changes depending on my mood. But I don't really care for my own writing that much, all I see is flaws lol. I guess the universe I would most like to write more for one day is Mrs Bridgerton and its sequel. Does that count?
No Pressure Tagging: A couple of my talented writing moots were tagged along with me on this (the lovelies @colettebronte and @eleanor-bradstreet). So lets go: @thebabblingbrookenook @fiction-is-life @ferns-fics @silverhallow @mothdruid @queen-of-the-misfit-toys @urchintoast 😁🧡🧡
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20 Questions For Fic Writers
Thank you @agerefandom for the tag!
1.) How many stories do you have on A03? 247 and counting!
2.) What's your total A03 word count? 961k! If all goes well I should break 1 mil by next Regressuary
3.) What fandoms do you write for? It's probably easier to list what I DON'T write for lol. I'll try everything at least once. I don't know at what point that became my brand but now I try to lean into it
4.) Top 5 fics by kudos? The Android Left Behind, Down Came the Building, Gods to the Rescue, Please Don't Take Off My Mask, and A Blessing or a Curse! The sad part is I don't think I like any of them anymore
5.) Do you respond to comments? I try to respond to every one but some definitely slip through the cracks and I feel guilty about it every time
6.) What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? That would have to be Queensguard. And yeah I did get rude comments because people didn't read the author's notes
7.) What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? If I had to pick one, I guess Taakito? Something about that tentative forgiveness, of moving forward together, has a special place in my heart. Also silly crack pairing. Good for Merle.
8.) Do you get hate on fics? Sometimes but not often. I've been called cringe before, I've been harassed, but most of that is all years ago at this point.
9.) Do you write smut? Absolutely not
10.) Craziest crossover? I don't really write crossovers, so it would have to be the P5/TUA crossover I did a couple years ago
11.) Have you ever had a fic stolen? Oh dear what a week that was
12.) Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes! A couple of my MCU fics were translated into Russian. The translator was very kind :)
13.) Have you co-written a fic before? Stuffkin and I collab on series but that's the closest I've gotten haha. I don't work well with others
14.) All-time favorite ship? Maxie/Archie. It's been 10 years at this point I think I've earned my gold card
15.) What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? I try to finish everything I post so I have a lot of P5 WIPs that I never posted and I can't see myself returning to. A fic about Joker's Palace, the New Mask Strikers fic, 2 vamp au fics, and the Akira and Ren as twin fics will probably never see the light of day :(
16.) What are your writing strengths? Dialogue, I think? And imagery, maybe. I don't really know anymore.
17.) What are your writing weaknesses? I feel like my writing is very rote and repetitive. It's missing something and I still don't know what.
18.) Thoughts on dialogue in another language? I try to avoid it if possible. I just know I can't do it well.
19.) First fandom you wrote in? We don't say its name.
20.) Favorite fic you've written? Oh jeez this is a hard one. I'm kind of in that limbo where I don't like anything I've written, but I guess I like heart of a pokemon, heart of a child best. At least, other people have told me it's good
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20 questions game
Thank you @luthordamnvers for the tag!!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
10 on AO3. many deleted on FF-net.
2. What’s your total AO3 words count?
309,689 which is like, wow, not that much. especially given that one story accounts for 105k of that.
3. What fandoms do you write for?
supercorp for AO3. i've definitely entertained the idea of writing for other fandoms, but haven't made it to an actually completed document yet. i've thought a LOT about writing for harlivy.
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
Mrs. & Mrs. Danvers, Fidelity, would you forget me (do i know you?), i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart), and What I Do When I Have Writer's Block. i have writer's block a lot.
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
i always try to respond to comments! i get that other people may not, so no judgment, but i figure if someone took the time to write to me, i can take the time to write back to them. it just seems like it fosters more community and the idea that we are all big fans, even just consumers, and appreciate artists of all types.
6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
i don't really write angst ending fics, but i've fleshed out a somewhat angsty 'No Way Home' spider-man AU that is pretty angsty.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
probably i carry your heart. faster than a speeding date is also the closest i think i've ever come to fluff.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
it's not common, but it's happened. i try to remind people to engage with the content they want to read. everything is tagged on ao3. there really isn't an excuse to be reading 7 full chapters only to then leave a comment like 'i hated this.' then what are you doing here? and if someone is pointing out something they believe to be problematic in my writing, i do my best to fix it. i've had both bad faith and good faith comments, and i really appreciate the latter. m&m au is a bit of a tough one because the original movie is QUITE problematic. that's where i've gotten these comments the most.
9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?
like many, i'm sure, i've tried. i'm not sure if i've succeeded. i'm really impressed with the skills it takes to do so. i think people massively underestimate how hard and vulnerable it can be.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
i have never written a crossover.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
yes.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
yes.
13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?
no, but i think that would be really fun.
14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?
i've had a lot of ships that i'm going to list here: harry/ginny. snape/lily. jack/juliet. selene/michael. buffy/angel. buffy/faith. mulder/scully. alison/emily. santana/brittany. villanelle/eve. kara/lena. poison ivy/harley. adora/catra. i've never written as many fics for anyone as i have for supercorp, so i guess it would have to be that.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?
there was this sex positive krypton/exchange student au prompt that i got so long ago, years ago, where i fell in love with the concept so much, i developed an entire original novel about it. the novel is absolutely a rip off of supercorp with different names because i didn't want to give DC my worldbuilding for krypton. i have about 60% of the plot written, but i am SO BAD at writing original stuff that i'm worried i'll never get it done. sometimes i've thought about just writing the god damn fanfic because at least then y'all would get to see it. i'm so obsessed with that story. it's absolutely insane.
16. What are your writing strengths?
i've been told action and dialogue. a kind of "movie like" description or pacing.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
i'm going to say the same thing as the person who tagged me: Actually writing.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
it would be really cool! i just don't speak any other languages well enough to write in. i don't mind people who want to translate at all though.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
harry/ginny. basic.
20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?
eternal sunshine au. i wrote it in less than 30 days, which has never happened again. and i felt like, even though i didn't at the time, that it actually captured both the essence of the movie and supercorp perfectly. it's one of those stories that is so HEAD canon to me, that sometimes i forget none of it happened in the show. i wish it had. i was so unimpressed by the explanation of why kara lied to lena, even though the 100th episode dangled the potential of it so close to our faces. in my mind, i just erase that, like my story, and imagine my version instead.
Tags, but no pressure: @littlemousejelly @shaolinbynature @coffeeshib @inkedroplets
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20 QUESTIONS GAME
Thanks for the tag @jfleamont!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
6.
2. What's your total AO3 words count?
256,418
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Just HP!
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
1. Kindly Stopped for Me – Multi-chapter: Lily lives AU, in progress.
2. This Mad, Mad Love – One-shot: Fluffy Jily love confession. 2,185 words.
3. The Joker and The Queen – Multi-chapter: Jily fake dating, in progress.
4. A Rollercoaster Kind of Rush – One-shot: 6th year Lily realizing her feelings for James. 4,124 words.
5. The Brightest Star in the Sky – One-shot: Post-war Hinny stargazing. 2,293 words.
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Yes!!! I love comments so much. They give me the encouragement I need to keep writing even when I'm feeling self-doubt or writer's block.❤️
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
As of right now, none of my completed fics have unhappy endings! I guess the closest is The Brightest Star in the Sky because it's post-war so grief is an essential part of the fic. But the story is about Harry and Ginny finding a moment of comfort in the midst of their pain. So...does that count?
My Jily one-shots were written so that I could give myself a break from the heartache of James being dead in Kindly Stopped for Me so they are all mostly happy😅 (although there is some angst in Mosaic Broken Hearts).
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Probably. This Mad, Mad Love. Although I'm just now realizing that several of my one-shots end with love confessions lol. I guess that's something I really wanted to write this year😅
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Occasionally on Kindly Stopped for Me. It hasn't been that bad, compared to what I know other authors have had to deal with, but yeah. I've gotten pretty liberal with the delete button recently, which has been good for my peace of mind, and I might turn off guest comments if this negative trend continues in the future (though I don't want to do that if I don't have to because not all guest comments are negative!)
I write for fun, as a hobby, so I have no time for people who think it's appropriate to leave unsolicited criticism or snarky comments on my work. Writing is an emotionally vulnerable thing to do, sharing writing publicly even more so, and I won't engage with people who don't respect that.
That said, I've been very fortunate in that the vast majority of comments I receive are lovely and encouraging. The Jily community in particular is a wonderful place full of people who have been so nice to me, and I'm constantly amazed by all the people (from the Jily community and beyond) who take the time out of their day to share kindness about my stories!!! Even a simple comment really really means a lot!
9. Do you write smut. If so what kind?
I haven't yet. But I might in the future. Who knows!
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
No. That's just not my thing!
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
I don't think so. I hope not!!!
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Nope!
13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?
Does the Jilytober Jilyexpress count? Because if so, yes. If not, then no. (but I'm open to it!) 😅
14. What's your all-time favourite ship?
I'd definitely say Jily. It's the ship that got me into fanfiction (the first fic I ever read was TLAT!) and it's still my favorite. But Hinny is a very very close second! I love those two ships with my whole heart.
Outside of HP, I'd have to go with Percabeth. I've never read any fanfics (maybe I will someday), but the Percy Jackson books were a huge part of my childhood!
15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?
I don't have one!! I know for a fact that I will finish Kindly Stopped for Me because I have the whole story plotted out and it takes up SO much of my thoughts at all times lol. My (possibly ambitious) goal is to finish it by February 6, 2024 because I posted the first chapter on February 6, 2023😅 But if I'm really productive I could potentially finish it by the end of 2023. We'll see! But it will for sure be finished either way.
As for The Joker and The Queen, I don't have the full plot outlined yet so I don't have a schedule in my mind of when it will be done. But I don't have any doubts that I'll finish it!
16. What are your writing strengths?
I think I'm good at dialogue. That's something that comes naturally to me, maybe in part because I have a lot of theatre experience and have read MANY plays in my life. So dialogue is definitely the most essential part of that!
I also think I'm good at writing angst. It seems to come more naturally than fluff, even though I'm generally happy these days.😂
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Brevity. I know it's the soul of wit, but it is not one of my strengths!!
I wish I could be paid by the word like Charles Dickens. I'd probably be thriving financially if that was my life😂
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
I mean...I took French for 7 years in school and then attended university in a bilingual English/French city. So...theoretically I could write some dialogue in French. Maybe? I can read it pretty well, even though I'm still not confident with speaking it. But I'm kind of rusty on it and I don't think I have the confidence to attempt to write creatively in French unless I have a beta reader who is more fluent.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
I've only ever written for HP.
20. Favourite fic you've ever written?
It has to be Kindly Stopped for Me. I'm really enjoying writing it and there are certain chapters that I am VERY excited to share with you all!
Tagging: @joyseuphoria, @suzyq31, @abihastastybeans, and @bronzeagepizzeria!! (I'm not sure who all has been tagged yet, so no pressure whatsoever if you've already been tagged or don't feel like doing this!)
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
Tagged by @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels and @devirnis
How many works do you have on ao3?
157
What's your total ao3 word count?
1,676,553
What fandoms do you write for?
Currently 9-1-1 but I also have written for The Almighty Johnsons, Les Mis, MCU, The Magicians, White Collar, 911 LS, Graceland, The Hobbit, The Man from UNCLE, Now You See Me, The Flash, Star Wars, Burn Notice, and Royal Pains.
Top five fics by kudos:
I Couldn’t Stand the Person Inside Me I Turned All the Mirrors Around
Oh Captain (My Captain), Our Fearful Trip is Done
Used to Think That Lovin' Meant a Painful Chase
If I Fall, Can You Pull Me Up?
Hiding the Christmas Present (of You and Me)
Do you respond to comments?
Nope
What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Bleeeehhhhhh...... I don't like writing angsty endings so probably Fallin’ Into Your Ocean Eyes or A Discovery of Boxer Briefs
What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
OHHH.... You know I don't actually know? Probably one of my AUs? I would pick some but then we'd be here all day.
Do you get hate on fics?
I've gotten a few rude comments and one comment that accused me of internalized misogyny on a fic where a female character actually saved hundreds of people which was pretty funny. I just usually delete them.
Do you write smut?
Hehehehee yes I do!
Craziest crossover:
No crossover yet! I did do one for Graceland and Les Mis but I wouldn't call that crazy.
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
I have with another author's work. Thankfully it got deleted.
Have you ever had a fic translated?
Not that I am aware of!
Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Yes with @buddie-buddie
All time favourite ship?
Probably Buddie!
What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
I don't generally quit a WIP. It just takes me forever 🤣 I have had an idea I was toying around with get shot down that kinda killed my inspiration for it but that's the closest I can think of!
What are your writing strengths?
Characterization!
What are your writing weaknesses?
Bleh I'm horrible at miscommunication! I also hate editing.
Thoughts on dialogue in another language?
If it fits the characterization then sure! If I'm not fluent or can't have someone who is read through it then I just write in English.
First fandom you wrote in?
Charmed!
Favourite fic you've written?
Omg so rude! Probably a fic that isn't listed on my account right now or The Warmth (of You) or.... Traded
Tagging: @bigfootsmom @rogerzsteven @buddie-buddie @homerforsure @mellaithwen
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