#this is such a real thing btw

[beanghostprincess]

Put Ace and Law into the mix of mentally ill drunks

Law: I miss my dead father so fucking much dad please come back cora-san plea-

Ace: I should've never been born. Existence is a prison. WHO HAS THE VODKA???

Law: I don't deserve to be alive *starts playing Bring Me to Life by Evanescence*

Ace: NO! *stops music and starts playing Bohemian Rhapsody*

Nami: Hey, I think you two should-

Ace: MAMAAAAAAA OHHHH I DON'T WANNA DIEEE SOMETIMES I WISH I'D NEVER BEEN BORN AT AALL

Usopp: Luffy, your brother is starting to worry me

Luffy: He's been like this since he was 10

Nami: That is NOT something good

Robin: I get it

Law: I thought I was gonna die at that age. But you know who saved me? Cora-san! And the guy had the audacity to leave me alone in this world and he died and that fucking flamingo took him away from me-

Sanji: My father ate his own leg to save me from starvation and now I can only prove I love somebody by sacrificing myself constantly

Usopp: Sanji-

Ace: Hey! Torao! My father is dead too! Shot for every dead parent!

Law: Why are you like this?

Ace: Because otherwise, I will fucking lose it

#just imagine they're partying together at the sunny #this is such a real thing btw #this is me every time i hang out with my friends #what type of drunk are you but op version #i'm sanji #i think law should cry for hours while drinking as a little treat bc he never lets himself cry #and i think ace is the funniest type of drunk bc he says he wants to die and two seconds later he's laughing his ass off #trafalgar law #portgas d. ace #black leg sanji #one piece

[fruit-teeth]

Me: maybe I’m not cut out to be a writer…idk what if I’m not good enough

BookTok romance writers: ‘what if you were just a normal school teacher…but the MINOTAUR wanted to get you PREGNANT’

#i know I’ve made posts like this before but like #it amazes me #I’ve never used tiktok but I find this shit hilarious #just me things #text post #writing #booktok cringe #shitpost #this isn’t a real book btw I made this up

[whydooldpeopletalk]

Speaking as someone who's been outed many, many times, by both "allies" and homo/transphobes, some of yall are way too comfortable sharing other peoples' queer identities.

"But what if I'm trying to be funny?" Doesn't matter.

"But what if I'm an ally?" Doesn't matter

"But what if the person I'm talking to is an ally?" Doesn't matter.

"But what if I'm queer?" Doesn't matter

"But what if the person I'm talking to is queer?" Doesn't matter.

"But what if the person I'm talking about is a stranger?" Doesn't matter.

"But what if it's really obvious?" First of all, ew. Second of all, Doesn't matter.

"But what if they didn't come out to me, I just figured it out on my own?" Doesn't matter.

"But what if they're getting misgendered?" It's just as easy to say 'actually she's a girl' as it is to say 'actually she's transgender and uses she/her'. If that person is pretransition, it's also easy to just bite your tongue and not say anything.

Unless that person has explicitly given you permission to share that information, you DON'T. No matter how certain you are that everyone is accepting, no matter how noble your intentions, it's not your information to share. Getting clocked sucks, getting outed sucks, and they're both an invasion of privacy no matter who's doing it.

#I told this girl I haven't seen hazbin the other day and she said 'you're gay and autistic how have you NOT seen it?!' and um. #This was in front of other people btw #im not actually gay or autistic either #Anyway. there are some things people say on tumblr that they shouldn't in real life. #lgbtq #gay #lesbian #trans #transgender #queer #bi

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

weird hearing "were you a Theatre Kid" "were you a Sports Kid" "were you a Choir Kid" "were you a Dance Kid" bc no? i mean i did all of that and more but resented ever minute of it? actively avoided sticking with anything? i was a "In This Family After School Activities Are Mandatory Kid"

#oh and i was really really bad at all of it btw #which was a good thing actually otherwise i would have gotten bored even *more* quickly #christ if i was good at a Activity i probably would have had to stick with it #that would have been EXHAUSTING #i survived soooo many Activities by standing in the background doing the bare minimum so I could focus on the Hyperrealistic Daydreams #baseball was my favorite. if u wear a glove u can literally just stand in the back of a field & stare at grass & no one bothers you #i mean usually no one bothers you but there is one specific situation where everyone starts yelling your name real loud and pointing

[crawley-fell]

#this is. a real thing that happened. btw #this is verbatim. and i; m fine #michael sheen #the assembly #good omens #my gifs #soz for the missing bloody frames blame my screen recorder

[rythyme]

"please tell me the omegaverse show is another joke like the thai goncharov remake" my brother in christ the "goncharov remake" was real too

#something something cassandra of troy #pit babe the series #pit babe #omegaverse #goncharov #kinnporsche #lgbt drama #thai drama #god that's a lot of improbably related tags #pbts #100 #theo.txt #this is not unreality btw. the only thing that's unreality is goncharov. #the ''goncharov remake'' is referring to a thai bl show that truly does exist #(but is not actually a remake of goncharov bc goncharov is not real) #it just happens to be about gay mobsters so ppl drew the parallels #500 #1k

[creatingchimera]

* injects my favorite nicktoon into @nicktoonsunite 's timeskip au because she was excluded from the games to spite ME SPECIFICALLY*

edit: colored the initial sketches and added some happy-centric new ones :)

#btw its unclear here but she still has a lisp + missing front teeth #she just wears a set of partial dentures #also it was never made like clear if the mighty b was a real thing or not but considering things like unicorns and time travel are real #in that universe i wouldn't be surprised if it was #anyway #nicktoons unite #the mighty b #fairly oddparents #danny phantom #spongebob squarepants #el tigre

[wyvernity]

been thinking about the sinnohtrio lately......plus misc other stuff

also, casual ko-fi drop!! get something in this sketchy style starting at $10 woop woop

#finally decided to do a commission test run u_u #pokemon #trainer lyra #trainer kris #trainer dawn #trainer lucas #rival barry #rival silver #ayalumi #hisuian zorua #luxio #timeskip tag #rkgk #anyway it's sinnoh time !!! #still figuring out their designs and lore but this works for now #god's specialest little guys & their very normal bestfriend who they would kill/die for. up to interpretation who is killing/dying #dawn is the platinum protag who meets giratina and becomes champion #distortion world affected her way more than compared to cynthia and cyrus since she's still a developing kid. but hey cool ghost hair! #4-5 yrs later lucas gets blasted to hisui..lost his memory for the three years he's there and when arceus sends him back he's just like Man #the entire time barry is CHILLING PLAYING HAVING FUN #and forever worried abt his friends ): dawn & lucas are soo nonchalant about what happened to them it's a bit concerning to everyone else #design comments umm the only thing that matters is that they still have their og scarves 👍 #and i guesss these are spring/summer outfits. winter dawn gets leggings and big coat ok. she already has too much yin energy #btw i use the cleanse tag as the direct opposition to the spell tag even tho that's probably not a real thing LOL) #oh yea barry wears the tower master ribbon 24/7. tower tycoon in training and won't shut up about it (i love him) #character dynamics i will talk abt that in another post if i feel like it... these days i just want to go replay pla aughh

[partlyironic]

hey guys. remember this.

#the thing with being a fan of these guys #is that sometimes certain moments will slam back into your consciousness #and you suddenly have to seek it out again to rewatch to make sure it was real. or that you weren't exaggerating. #or just to try and work out what any of it was about #and unfortunately a lot of the time you will find a rewatch will give you ZERO further clarification tbh. #anyway. needed this on my blog. #two men one braincell #sceptic believer #shyan #watcher #ghost files #ghost files debrief #(this is the magnolia hotel ep. btw.) #helen speaks

[inkskinned]

yesterday while feverish i wrote about how boats can moor next to each other like pigeons, cooing with the gentle rap of water against their hull. you once said that that the way i see things - birds in the water, feathers in marina paint - was "childish and naive." you said i'd been misdiagnosed - "it can't all be adhd. you might be just kind of stupid and lazy."

i still do certain things like how you taught me - turn the pillow case inside out before putting it on. drive defensively. hate myself entirely.

the prompt for this poem is "mahler's fifth." i wish it wasn't, but mahler's fifth was our song. it ended up in my book. every person that knows your name has promised me they'll give you one swift rabbit punch, right to the face. dean read the book and showed up on my front porch, drenched in sweat from running the 8 miles at 4 in the morning. he was shaking. pacifist and gentle - he works with children - i'd never seen him furious. a punch isn't going to do it, he said, and then said i'm sorry. i had to come to see if you were okay.

mahler's fifth was mine first, like my girlhood. i like the way each movement piles onto the next movement, each instrument bleeding into the next. i like the horn version the best. before i met you, i danced to it on grass still-wet from sprinklers.

later you would tell me that the way you heard it was somehow better. you understood something in it that i couldn't quite wrap my fingers into. once, on our anniversary, you asked the classical music radio station to play it for us. we missed hearing it because we were fighting. one of the things people get wrong about abuse is that sometimes victims are, like, brutally aware of the stupidity of our situation. what do you mean that you thought i wasn't good enough for you? you? you're just... nothing.

sometimes people can pull the poetry out of your life. i watched my words become clothesline, and then thin out into kite twine. i watched you chew through every good syllable of me. so many good songs and places and moments were ruined. i am glad you didn't like most of my music - less to tie back to you.

but still mahler's fifth. the music swells, and i am 21 and throwing up in a bathroom on my birthday. a woman i will later refer to as lesbian jesus runs a cool hand down my back, her perfect pantsuit starch-pressed. she told me to leave you. she said - and this is true, and not an invention of rhyme or fantasy - i'm you from the future.

i am 22, and i got home from an award ceremony, and i remember you telling me - you act so proud of yourself when you're actually so fucking embarrassing. i took you to disney world. you took my virginity. i gave up visiting spain for a week with my family - i instead choose you, to spend the time just-cuddling. you called it "our fuck week." the music swells. it probably should have been a red flag that for about 3 years - i just gave up on crying. my grandfather died and you said nothing. my uncle died and you ghosted me for 3 weeks. you said i need to protect myself from your ongoing tragedy.

every so often i come back to the memory of one of our last afternoons in person. i had just told you that i wasn't going to law school, despite the free ride - i was going to join a creative writing program. master's in fine arts. i was going to finally do it - i was going to follow my dreams. this blog was already internet-famous. however reluctantly, i would occasionally refer to myself as a poet. i got into umass amherst's writing program for fiction authors. it is one of the the top 5 programs in the country.

wait are you seriously considering actually attending that? dumbfounded, you turned completely towards me in your seat. for the 3rd time in our relationship, you almost crashed the car. you actually want to be a writer?

the first time i went viral, it was for a poem i wrote about you:

he wants to say i love you but keeps it to goodnight because love will take some falling and she's afraid of heights.

every time i see that, i want to throw up. you weren't in love with me, you were in love with the control you had over me. a little truth though: i am afraid of heights. you caught a rabbitgirl and skinned her alive.

mahler's fifth still makes me sick.

give me that back. give me back music. give me back everything i had before you. give me back fearlessness. give me back bravery. give me back a scarless body.

give me back what you took from me.

#nosebleed club #sorry stephen not ur fault #just like. thinking #writeblr #spilled ink #warm up #every time nat is like - oh let me get that for u #im like .... this is a trick right like ur gonna be mean now bc u did something nice rn #so obviously if ur being nice now either u did something mean and im about to learn about it #or you're going to BE mean #or ur gonna hold this over my head forever and i'll never get a nice thing ever again? #and every time nat is like .... babe i just actually like u #lesbian jesus story is 100% real btw. she also told me not to be an event planner #literally changed the shape of my life

[d4ydream-girl]

comments from smosh cast + crew on shourtney's wedding post!!

ft. mythical, thomas sanders, and www.chess.com?? lol

#courtney miller #shayne topp #smosh #shourtney wedding #shourtney #smoshblr #if i missed comments... umm im not going thru those comments again i cant think straight #thought it was funny how some of the smosh gang are also acting confused in the comments AS IF THEYRE NOT IN ON IT #theyre REALLYYY selling it if its just a prank #real or not i KNOW they were all laughing around the office abt this #the battle btw angela damien and sarah trying to get first LMAO #this day is going to go down in smosh history as the day the the fandom broke #tbh real or not im just really impressed with this whole thing #even if im dying for answers #head vs heart ykwim #“guys its literally april fools” vs “guys theyre literally married now” #now watch me try to tag as many ppls names as i can TT #angela giarratana #chanse mccrary #amanda lehan canto #anthony padilla #damien haas #sarah whittle #arasha lalani #noah grossman #olivia sui #trevor evarts #tommy bowe #ian hecox #spencer agnew

[min-play]

banned from woodwork class

#min draw #minbitt #don't do this btw #i miss highschool woodwork class #i don't miss the rest of high school #this is the closest thing i could get to becoming a blacksmith #roll your sleeves up when working with the belt sander #my work is NOTHING compared to this one kid #who made a wholeass working butterfly knife out of wood #real spy

[skumhuu]

Proshipper = you're against censorship and harassment over fiction & curate your experience on the internet to have a healthy distance from things that make you uncomfortable

Antishipper = you're okay and even encourage harassment towards "freaks" and "weirdos" society deems acceptable to hurt

#drama llama #fandom etiquette #please stop filling ship tags with hate #moving this post from twt to here #PROSHIPPING IS JUST A STANCE ON HARASSMENT AND CENSORSHIP #It doesn't mean you actually ship or like dark things #only that you're against censorship and attacking real people over fiction #you don't need to identify with the terminology especially when people are afraid of harassment #but don't fill ship tags with misinformation and hate #just mentioning the ship adds your post to the tag btw #just tw for incest?????? #literally just tw for the kink #WITHOUT leet speak!!! you can say incest its okay!!! #this isn't about one person in particular #people do this on twt too #if people seek out anyone in the tags to attack i WILL block you too DO NOT harass people

[mary-kasexual]

what if she was fucked up and evil actually

#total drama #td jasmine #pahkitew reverse au #my art #her whole thing is that shes really lazy and antisocial. she only really contributes whenever she absolutely has to & its always begrudging #also shes one of THOSE gamers. she'd 100% quote the “you're not a real gamer” copypasta word for word she is awful <3 #part of an antag alliance w sammy (who i plan on making a ref for later on along with amy) and frequently causes problems on purpose #love jasmine btw i need to post about her more because shes Awesomesauce™

[formulaonedirection]

lock up your dads he's on the loose

#lando norris #SORRY! If I had KNOWN you guys were gonna reblog that! Anyway. I'm a stupid girl so here's actual real proper gifs #that no one will rb now but it's okay it's for ME. #nadia's things #hello christ i'm bout to sin again #this video is via the cardinals instagram btw. source

[theloopus]

gay 70s copaganda thesis is actually about the inherent homoeroticism of the western genre and the cultural image of the male cowboy it borrows from. or as Susan Sarandon once put it, "They got their guns out because they couldn't get their dicks out"

#fun fact! making this fancam almost killed me in real life because it caused me to forget and leave my stovetop on all night for over 6hrs. #starsky & hutch #starsky and hutch #dave starsky #ken hutchinson #starsky/hutch #do they have a ship name #starskinson #? #vintage slash #im just saying things now #my posts #my edits #txt #orville peck #the song is: lafayette by orville peck. btw. #what a way to end 2023. almost dying by gay 70s copaganda fancam #i think starsky wouldve loved orville peck (hot angsty gay cowboy)