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#they have no reason to care about me’ is as a statement like that’s fucked up to think and feel. but it’s also not malicious or really you
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"Narcissists shouldn't be allowed to have children."
There's no reason for a statement like that.
If you're worried about narcissists abusing children, just say what actions you're worried about narcissists doing and say that people who do those actions shouldn't be allowed to have children. For example,
Those who want power over their children and no accountability shouldn't be allowed to have children.
Those who see their children as property and not as people shouldn't be allowed to have children.
Those who think it's ever okay to hit their children shouldn't be allowed to have children.
Those who destroy their children's belongings shouldn't be allowed to have children.
Those who believe in "as long as you live under my roof you will follow my rules" shouldn't be allowed to have children.
Those who believe in "I buy things for you so you owe me" shouldn't be allowed to have children.
Those who can't handle criticism from their children shouldn't be allowed to have children.
Those who can't handle their children not conforming to their expectations shouldn't be allowed to have children.
Those who care more about how their children make them look than about their children's well being shouldn't be allowed to have children.
Of course, you won't do that, because that would apply to neurotypical parents who do those things all the fucking time. You don't actually want to protect children from abuse. You only want to single out narcissists while giving typical authoritarian parents a free pass.
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aleksa-sims · 2 days
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RL Story
CW: Divorce, addiction
It was a Friday, October 13th to be exact. Daniel and I are getting a divorce today. After weeks, he finally signed the divorce papers. I was devastated. It was so hard for me to take this step. But I had to finish it, for my Baby and also for myself, to finally forget Daniel. We met near the city hall, where we had an appointment with a divorce-case officer and judge.
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Once there, I saw Daniel coming towards me. I honestly didn’t want to divorce him. I loved him, still, so much. 😥But... that's just the way life is. 😞... He looked at me... I wanted to hug him but instead I just said sadly, hi. Daniel seemed absent for a moment, staring at my belly. 🩵👶
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He had this... empty look. Not sad or angry, rather.... emotionless.
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With my eyes lowered, I just stood there. I struggled to hold back my tears. Exactly a year ago we moved together. I was so happy with him and now this. 😞
Me: I'm so sorry. I never wanted this! And I still don’t want it. I wish we could just go home together.
Daniel: Same, but...let's not get into that now. Relax and think about your Baby.
Me: What?
Daniel: It's gonna be okay. Trust me.... C'mon, let’s get this over with.
Me: Yea,,...whatever you say. 😞
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Um.... well! Daniel and I didn’t get divorced today. The judge asked us why we wanted to divorce? D.'s & my statements left some question marks with the judge, I think? We have to wait six months, before we get divorced.... Daniel said that my jealousy (Tina, Irma...) & insecurity were the biggest probs for him in our relationship.😠... However, the real reason for postponing our divorce was bcs Daniel inherited Dominick’s plot & house. (division of property) Although I refused any claim to Daniel’s property!!
Me: Did you really, seriously mean what you said to them?
Daniel: I answered all questions honestly.
Me: Why didn’t you just give the real reason for our divorce? You took off!!! I didn't know where you were!! And my Baby isn't yours. This fact is the reason for our divorce! You can't handle that I'm pregnant. Or that we are both addicts, which would have been a good reason why we can’t stay together! 🤦‍♀️
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Daniel: The juge asked me WHY, I left! You got it?.... You and my borther, your secrets drove me crazy. That fucking shit about Tina. I was overwhelmed with my shit, our drugs you and your delusions. I kept trying to make you happy! I only loved you and I only wanted you. But you just didn’t believe me. Be honest, it wasn’t my fault, just yours!! You don’t know what you want! And you can’t make decisions! But I’m not like N.! I don’t want to tell you what to do or how to live your life. You are responsible for yourself! Finally get it, or just stay with your soccer player and let him control you.
Me: What kind of shit are you talking?? Nico doesn’t do any of this to me.
Daniel: I talked to him! He said, you won’t be the same after he’s done with you. He told me this to my face!! And btw, I can’t stand Alex calling you Lexi!! 😠
Me: You must have misunderstood N. He isn't like that! He was just upset, bcs I confessed what I wanted from you the other day. Besides, you’re jealous too!!! Anyway.... I-.. I just can’t stand it around you anymore. And I’m sorry I was so jealous. I loved you so much. I wanted to do anything for you. I was terrified to lose you. I’m sorry. Sorry I was such a freak to you. But I didn’t do anything wrong with your brother, D.!! There was NOTHING between Alex and me!! IDK how many times I’ve had to say this damn sentence. Finally get it!....
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Me: It hurts so much and it just doesn’t stop.... I don’t want to love you anymore. I wish you’d never married me. 😢
Daniel: Damn, I-... I'm sorry. I still struggle with that... stress disorder. Either I feel nothing-... or I boil with rage.🤦‍♂️
Me: It's ok.. I'm leaving.... See you in 6 moths. And.. stay off drugs, just... take care, Daniel. 😢
Daniel: Wait!
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Me: I gotta go. Sorry. Bye!.... 😭
Daniel: I-...... love you.
I just wanted to get away from there. Far away from.... him.💔 Not really, but.... agh, you know what I mean. And I’ll see Daniel again sooner than I thought. Right after delivery. It was about that annoying name change. D. and I were officially still married, but I didn't want to give my Son his surname. D. is not his Dad, but N. Such a mess!!
Previous/Next
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apollo-zero-one · 19 days
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Man I can't believe I had the chance to go to a performing arts school up through middle school and I fuckin quit after 6 months just because I got bullied. BRO YOUR HOMEWORK WAS POETRY!! YOU HAD TO PRACTICE DANCING TO COTTON EYE JOE AS YOUR BIG UNIT TEST. GYM CLASS HAD A CIRCUS UNIT!! YOU HAD A WHOLE DAILY CLASS ON IMPROV!!! YOU FOOL!! YOU ABSOLUTE IMBICILE!! YOU COULD HAVE BEEN A YOUTUBER!!! YOU COULD HAVE BEEN ONE OF THOSE TWEENAGERS GETTING LOADED BY MAKING SHITTY YOUTUBE SHORTS IN 2008-14!! But noooOoooOOOoo little miss Noellie (who WANTED TO GO!! who worked SO HARD and sent in an application essay and did an INTERVIEW to get in!!) couldn't handle disruptive classmates or little scuffles and petty grudges and general Attitude of the other students and cried to mommy to put her back in public school. I am EATING MY HAIR over what Could Have Been. I COULD BE SOMEONE'S ANNOYING YOUTUBER!! I could be a DISGRACED DISNEY CHANNEL STAR!! I could be an America's Got Talent winner! A mild to moderately successful comedian! I could be making short films!! But no no no precious thin skinned baby me heard a few new cus words and watched a teacher get heckled and begged to give up The Dream in favor of?? Quiet math tests?? I am such a fucking quitter I quit everything the second it gets too hard I always take the out as soon as it's offered what's my fucking damage.....
#I had SO MUCH POTENTIAL and I SQUANDERED IT!! weak ass third grade PUSSY! Your life could have been SO SICK!!#or you could at least be addicted to cocain or something interesting like that!! Boring ass goody two shoes always just staying home doing#NOTHING bitch make a REAL FRIEND go to a God Damn PARTY live a little instead of just hiding in the closet eating saltine crackers for years#waiting for it to be quiet outside before you ever even toed the line#mentally ill self-isolating motherfucker#you could have shrugged it off you could have GROWN A PAIR and FOUGHT BACK but you just ran and cried for mommy#victim complex little bitch baby always whining and exaggerating and making shit up fucking LIAR I am you and I KNOW what you did and I know#you knew it wasn't the truth and you regretted it the moment it came out of uour mouth but once you'd said it you just swallowed it back and#doubled down incriminating or discrediting others with your lies. For why? Because you didn't like them? You could have ruined someone's#life you wouldn't have hesitated mayhe you did and don't even remember because you cant keep your mouth shut with your pants ablaze#manipulative little shit and to WHAT END? Pity? Sympathy? Attention? Entertainment?? What was even going on in your stupid ugly head?#This is a callout post for my third grade self that possessed demon ass evil nine year old. That kid drowned anthills in olive oil and#poisoned a wild animal once. That kid cut plants just to see if they oozed. That kid modified her whole ass personality on a dime for a boy#she had a crush on. INSTANTLY dropped a LIFELONG CULTURAL ALLEGIANCE (thats what football teams were like back then in our town) because he#said he had the opposite allegiance??? What the fuck? girl had NO integrity none zip zilch.#No empthy either that kid looked at everyone else on earth like they were friggin space aliens and she was the only one with Real feelings.#bitch literally thought like 'I have Feelings they just have Reactions' bitch what the fuckkkkk#that nine year old was fucked the hell up!!!#and for literally NO REASON!! No cause!! Just born fucking evil and weird. jesus fuck.#Evil ass bitch caused her autistic brother months of nightmares and then laughed about it and wrote poetry about how evil he was because he?#was a kid??? Normal sibling rivalry taken way way way too far defamatory ass statements#and this girl had NO CONSEQUENCES because she could lie and manipulate her way out of ANYTHING she had the baby eyes and the helpless charm#and played dumb soooo well . read people like some calculative evil AI scanning their faces for microexpressions and overanalyzing each word#choice like holy shit. its not That Deep. pretentious shit trying to play 5D chess on a checkers board.#Manipulating shit just to see what happens?? zero awareness?? no asking just skipping straight to testing for yourself??#'What happens if I step on this' it fucking breaks 'what does that taste like?' it's not fucking yours to mess with 'if I hit this person#how will they respond?' they'll be upset use your goddamn judgement you are NINE not TWO do you even care a little about any other person??#Are you just living in some other reality???#callout post for the fucking demon child inside of me#im so goddamn problematic I'm so so so deeply mentally disturbed and broken for no reason
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killmebythebeach · 2 years
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Just listened to 118 and jesus FUCK. How do you like. Be a person after that?
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missiodine · 1 year
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tfw you wanna try to play ttrpgs again, but ever since playing a few years ago during a certain two campaigns, you were bullied by people who you thought were your friends because you didn't know how to play and they made up reasons why they should dislike you irl. especially while you tried to be nice to them and give them space and tried to make steps towards interacting with them in rp too.
like no, it wasn't like "oh, it's just character interaction, these characters just don't like each other!" no it was "no joke, I absolutely hate your guts, Miss Iodine, fuck you and I'll be an arse to you in-game and irl. i will ignore everything you and your character say, i will attack your character because why not and say it's just what my character would do, and then start harassing my DMs"
love it when i tried for months to reach out for a proper sit down only to be given a sorry-not-sorry half-assed push the blame onto the victim apology
like yes this lives rent free in my head. you won, if that's what you wanted.
#autumn says stuff#vent#im still so fuckin salty even though its been so long#i just don't understand how people can treat others so terribly and not even think twice about it#never a moment of ‟maybe I did wrong?‟#nah. just tell Miss Iodine ‟You're a problem‟#yes that exact statement was said to me#maybe ‟bully‟ is a cliche word but i dunno what else to call it#like mate i've been nearly stabbed before during what i can only assume was an attempted hate crime. technically i did get hurt ig because#grabbed the knife by the blade as it was being thrusted towards me. i still have the said knife btw. wanna get free knife? just grab it#from your attacker. and then they'll run off because they're a little shit. actually don't do that. don't recommend that. okay so the point#is that yk ive been hurt physically many times but goddamn this situation still hurts emotionally#it was funny when said someone in this group told me i was 'appropriating neurodivergent culture.' mate. mate. wot. im how?#take it from me. im not neurotypical lmao. i thought that was obvious but no. no idea where this even stemmed from tbh because it really#came out of nowhere. also being called a fascist for years by these people for liking worldbuilding and star trek was cool. didn't realize#that fuckin reading old soviet books and playing papers please and minecraft makes me a fascist somehow. but you learned it here.#im still so fucking pissed about that accusation. love that their additional reasoning that im somehow a fascist was that#‟you're getting mad and keep insisting you're not a fascist‟ is proof that you're a fascist. what else am i supposed to do? you haven't#even given an ounce of some so-called mountain of evidence.#its cool that no one cared about what these people did to me. better to retain a friendship with them and never bring up what they did.#better to just alienate miss iodine from the friend group. better to never bring it up. better to forget any of this happened. better to#forget that miss iodine exists.#sometimes i wish i could know what its like to not give a flying fuck about other people. I wonder what it's like to be such a shitty perso#fucking hell.#thought i found home when i first met that group. instead it just reminds me of the home i grew up in.#My biological family (save two cool cousins) is probably a collection of some of the worst people in existence.
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thatone-churro · 6 months
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y’know just as soon as i start getting comfortable with the idea of being open/relying on my dad and him being more comfortable with my choices than i feared, i can essentially throw all that out the window with how vehemently he yelled at me at the thought of my getting my septum pierced (even though i never said i was yet. i said my side before i decide anything else). also making underhanded remarks of me never getting tattoos other than the one for my mom. like okay don’t ask me why i don’t tell you about anything or talk to you or anything. what the fuck.
#‘i love you no matter what’ and ‘you’re an adult and as long as your choices make you happy’ out the window i guess.#are we too sober for those statements to apply all of a sudden?#and again i didn’t even say i was getting it any time soon. i said my sister wants to take me to get my first non-ear piercing.#she’s getting hers repierced & i want to get my side.#and then he started going off on me for it for no reason. and brought up the one tattoo i want to get for my mom.#and THEN made an off handed remark of a similar vein about dyed hair.#i hope he knows he’s literally the only reason i don’t have piercings or tattoos or dyed hair or like anything that lets me look how i wanna#like deadass. i know i’m your ‘baby.’ but can i please actually embrace myself. i don’t care if you don’t like alt culture. i do.#he would shun the girls i crush on fr like oh my god.#like if he knew what i really wanted to look like i think he’d disown me. won’t even have to bring up my funky relationship with gender.#literally as soon as i start thinking i can be open with this man he pulls this shit and then asks why i’m slowly getting more distant.#like wow it’s almost like i’ve been regulated and raised according to what you want and not what i want.#and you wonder why my sisters (especially my oldest who has a lot of piercings & tattoos like i want) aren’t close either? isn’t that wild?#how we never got much of a chance to explore this without reprimand until we were moved out? even as legal adults?#absolutely WILD correlation there i wonder if the causation lines up here pa. what the fuck.#anyway i’m gonna go now and not cry because my roommates are home but i’m gonna go sulk because i’m sick of this ✌️#oh wait convenient that the showdog poem went up tonight too isn’t that crazy. man calls himself out so hard lol#grace being stupid#text post#personal
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inkskinned · 10 months
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so while i was writing the book, i became violently suicidal.
this was mostly due to the fact that i had a very bad reaction to some meds and my brain stopped producing any serotonin. also i was in the last semester of grad school where it's actually illegal to feel anything but dread. so it wasn't going well.
somewhere in the fog of it i became aware i needed help. nobody was taking clients or my insurance. i didn't want to do inpatient care - it wasn't right for my needs. there's not really an "in between" stage between "inpatient" and "no care," but i was trying to do the right thing. i was trying to activate the chain of command that was my emergency plan. i knew i needed help now.
i used betterhelp.
i know, i know. i'm a straight-A student and so smart and so clever, how could i ever use something so blatantly bad. to be honest with you, i didn't feel particularly keen on it from the getgo - things that seem too good to be true usually are. also, if something online is free, the price is usually your privacy.
the thing is that there was kind of a global pandemic happening at the time and i worked 5 jobs alongside of being a fulltime student and also like writing a book on the side. it is a miracle that i even thought about getting help. i would love to tell you i had the mental wherewithal to like, process whether this was the right choice for me. mostly i was desperate. i was so suicidal that i was trying to find a reason to stay inside of fortune cookies. i was the kind of suicidal that looks like splatterpaint. i hadn't been that bad in an entire decade.
they took my data. i gave them it freely. somewhere out there, they have a dossier on me. on everything i survived. my story in little datapoints, scattergraphed beautifully.
the first woman told me that really i should be grateful, because (and this is a direct quote): "at least you're not anne frank." i said that i felt that statement was antisemitic, as anne frank's life and experience shouldn't be compared to like, a nonbinary lesbian in western massachusetts. the therapist said that i should try to use lucid dreaming to try to picture myself in an actually scary situation, like running from nazis.
i applied for another therapist. i was willing to accept the possibility that there was a bad apple in the bunch. the next therapist and i even laughed about how inappropriate that statement was. and then, in our next session: the new therapist said if i was struggling with body image issues, i should just work harder on my appearance. she spent 3 sessions in a row talking about how she was grieving, and made me memorize facts about her grandmother so "she can live on through my clients."
i am a three's-a-charm kind of person. okay, so what if the last person made me uncomfortable. i figured it was just a misunderstanding of priorities - she had felt she was sharing with me, i had felt like i had to take care of her. i applied for another therapist.
the last woman asked me to help her pray. she bowed her head. i stared at her, frozen, while she said: lord, i beg you: cure her. take the pain of being gay away from her.
i spent somewhere between 2.5 and 3 months on betterhelp. in that whole time, i was not getting the professional help i so desperately needed, even though i was fucking trying.
in the end, i survived this because i finally could get off the meds that were literally killing me. a request for a real therapist finally went through. i survived because my friends saved my life. because nick let me sob myself dry in his arms. because maddie took the razors out of my room when i asked them to. because grace slept over in my bed for like 3 weeks in a row since nobody trusted me not to hurt myself when i was alone. i survived because i got fucking lucky. because even when i was desperately suicidal, i was too old and too self-aware to take "you need to be prettier" as good advice.
the thing is that there's a 19 year old me who isn't like that. who would have heard "just think about how grateful you should be" and said - oh, i see. i would have assumed that is what it means to be in therapy: the same thing my abusers used to tell me. that i am just pretending and lazy. that i am ugly and unworthy.
betterhelp positioned itself to take advantage of an incredibly vulnerable community. it preys on desperation. it knows it is serving people who are not doing well mentally. it saw that there is a huge need for real, immediate, compassionate mental health care: and then it fucking takes your money and privacy.
i still get their ads on instagram. last night i watched as a woman in a pool pretends to talk to a different woman. they discuss her anxiety.
there's a 19 year old version of me, and she didn't survive this. she was too tired, and drowning. i almost fucking died. this thing almost fucking killed me.
in the ad, the woman playing the therapist takes a note on a clipboard and then nods once, sagely.
i have to admit it's a pretty scene. the steam and light coming off the pool water lands on the actresses. like this, it almost looks baptismal, holy.
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osaemu · 8 months
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GOJO SATORU: ❛❛ SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE ❜❜
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.ೃ࿐ staying the night at your ex-husband's house was a mistake. NSFW
contents: fem!reader. you and gojo have a daughter. oral (m. and f. recieving), satoru calls you a slut + whore, degradation mixed with praise, mocking, dacryphilia.
author's note: edit—crying bcs an irl read this and alluded to it in one of our convos pls actually kill me /hj
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"hey, sweetheart," the man holding your daughter's hand says casually, as if he doesn't know how much you hate the pet name. "you took your sweet time."
a familiar scowl makes its way onto your face and you cross your arms. "satoru, will you ever stop calling me that?" you ask exasperatedly, pressing two of your fingers into your temples.
six years.
you've known satoru for six years, and you were his wife for four of them. now, after a long, painful road, you two were finally divorcées.
it's been a year since you and satoru ended things, and sure, it was hard for all of you, but life moved on. your daughter, to her delight, still gets to see her father on weekends. and unfortunately, you usually tagged along.
"mommy, can we stay for the night?" your four year old asks, looking up at you with big, shiny eyes. "please?"
you hesitate — if it were up to you, you wouldn't stay in this house, the one you once lived in any longer. "sorry, pumpkin. i think we should go. wouldn't wanna intrude on daddy's space any longer."
you hate the look on satoru's face when you refer to him in the same way your daughter does. fucking pervert.
"you two can stay as long as you want," satoru interjects smoothly. he smiles lazily, kneeling down to your daughter's height and ruffling her hair. "it's kinda late, isn't it? i'd hate for you to have to drive all the way back in the dark."
"yeah, mummy!" your daughter says, nodding along to satoru's words. "i'm tired."
you wince and ignore the smug grin on satoru's face as he stands back up with a soft grunt. "we should head home, kiddo. i bet your dad has work to do, and we have our own house."
satoru frowns slightly at the last statement, but he doesn't even consider shooting back — not in front of his daughter. "sweetheart," he says to you, voice coated in that sickeningly sweet tone that you hated, "it's late. and i don't have any work."
when satoru sees the way you scowl at him, a smile tugs at the corners of his mouth. "you have any other reasons why you wanna leave?"
none that you need to know.
both your ex-husband and your daughter, who takes after her dad more, take your silence as grudging agreement. 
"hey, kid, d'you want to go to bed?" satoru fondly asks your daughter, ruffling her hair again. when she nods, sleepiness evident in her eyes, satoru scoops her up and carries her off to her room without looking back.
when they turn the corner into your daughter's room, you sigh and plop down on satoru's couch. your ex-husband was an infuriatingly good father, and it pissed you off. 
a couple minutes later, satoru strolls out of the room, closing the door gently behind him. 
"so, babe, you dating anyone?" satoru says conversationally as he plops down on the couch next to you. he's close enough to make you tense, but stays just out of your personal space.
"what's it to you if i am?" you mutter, ignoring the pet name. you know that if you tell him to stop, he'll just say it more, so you don't bother.
he scoffs and faces you, resting his back against the arm of the couch. "what's up your ass today?"
"fuck off, satoru."
satoru whistles and tsks at you, shaking his head. "language, sweetheart. you kiss our daughter with that mouth?" 
after a couple seconds, his expression softens and he studies your face carefully. "what's on your mind?"
and just like that, you're back to the times when the two of you were happy. back when satoru wasn't such a dipshit and actually cared about how you felt.
unfortunately, those times were over.
long over, you remind yourself as you dig your nails into the palm of your hand. "nothing you need to be concerned about," you reply. your tone is clipped, and the words come out harsher than you meant them to.
satoru doesn't seem to mind. in fact, he has a lopsided grin on his face as he scoots closer to you, a mischievous glimmer in his eyes.
"you wanna fuck it out?"
his words are so unexpected that your mouth almost drops open. thankfully, it doesn't, but a couple minutes later, your legs do.
"fuckkk," you moan, tilting your head back as satoru's tongue trails a stripe up your slit. 
"keep it down, sweetheart," satoru says without looking up. "don't wan' to wake up our daughter, do ya?"
you hum in response, physically covering your mouth with one of your hands to muffle the sounds escaping the confines of your lips.
in the year that you and satoru had ended things until now, you'd slept with a couple guys. you'd even dated one or two of them, but god, none of them could use their mouth like satoru could.
satoru can't help but smile as he eats you out, pulling away momentarily to shake his head at you. "tsk, you were so mean to me earlier. and now look at you." he dips his head to nip at your clit and grins when he feels you flinch.
"i've barely even started and you're already drippin' all over my sheets," he mutters, lips brushing against your inner thigh. "fuck, takin' my tongue so good, you little slut."
"satoru, i w-wanna cum," you mewl, shuddering when his tongue re-enters your folds. "wan' you inside me."
"i already am, dummy."
you feebly attempt to swat his head in response before scowling and insisting that he knew what you meant.
satoru scoffs as he pulls himself up to face level to you. he readjusts his position over you so your back is pressed into the mattress underneath him before pressing his lips to your ear.
"let's put that mouth of yours to use, yeah?" he mumbles, slipping two fingers underneath his sweatpants' waistband and tugging him off. 
it's been years since you last fucked with satoru, and in that time you had forgotten just how pretty he was. you'd never admit it out loud, but you really didn't mind the reminder. setting into a comfortable position, you wrap your lips around his cock, relishing the way his moans get louder and louder.
you hum slightly, resisting the urge to smile when you feel satoru shake from the vibration. but god, his reaction when you run your tongue over his tip? priceless.
"fuck, baby, it's been too long since you've sucked me off. forgot how good you were- aah," he cuts himself off with a breathy moan. "fuckkk."
you briefly stop to look up at him with a cheeky smile. "you still moan like a girl, satoru."
"and you're as much of a slut for me as ever," he grumbles, reaching down and pushing your head into his painfully hard cock again. "d-don't stop, baby. feels s' good."
satoru's moans only get louder from there, until you have to be the one reminding him that your daughter's asleep two doors down.
"m' gonna cum," he whines, grabbing a handful of your hair and tangling his long fingers in it. "swallow all of it, yeah? don't waste a drop."
you nod your head obiediently, using your tongue just the way you know he's always liked to push him closer and closer to the edge until–
"fuckin' whore," satoru gasps, groaning loudly as he cums in your mouth, hips grinding against your face. "aah, missed your s-slutty tongue, baby, fuck."
"missed your girly moans," you manage to gasp before his tip hits the back of your throat, painfully so.
"shut up and swallow," satoru commands, tugging on your hair just enough to make you cry out. "yeah, who's moaning like a slut now, hmm?"
after you swallow all his cum and lick your now-swollen lips, satoru has you open your mouth so he can check. 
"good girl, looks like there's at least one thing you can do right, even if it is just sucking me off. c'mere," he mutters, pinning you down on the mattress and making the bedsprings creak loudly. "m' gonna fuck you, m'kay?"
you nod, reaching out to stroke his saliva-covered cock. "y-yes, please, satoru."
your ex-husband, who you should really not be fucking with, looks down at you with a smirk and takes your hand, bringing it up to his lips. "you look so pretty, baby. all covered in my cum, never looked hotter."
he nudges your legs apart with his knee before pushing himself into you, gritting his teeth through a smug grin when you cry out in pain. "careful, baby. wouldn't wanna wake up our daughter with your slutty moans, would ya?"
"s-satoru, hurts s' much," you whine, pawing at his chest. "you're too big, i can't-"
"you're too big, i can't," satoru mocks, rolling his eyes. "how do you think our daughter was made, baby? did the storks just drop her off?"
his next thrust is particularly harsh, and something about your pained cry almost makes him cum again on the spot. "fuck, we should do this more often," satoru cooes, reaching up and stroking your cheek. "wait, you cryin'?"
yes, you were crying. your cheeks were wet with a mixture of your tears and the remainder of his cum from earlier, and fuck, all you could think about was satoru's cock. so much for being so over him.
satoru laughs, shaking his head and slowing his pace to give you a kiss. "just when i thought you couldn't get any prettier, you gotta go and prove me wrong," he mumbles, licking his lips. "god, you're fucking beautiful."
he presses his lips to yours again, this time letting his tongue slip into your mouth. "i missed you so much, baby. i still do," he mutters in between kisses. he's controlling the pace, purposefully making each kiss's ending sudden as to not allow you to talk — only him.
"you know how many times i've jacked off to you?" satoru breaths, reaching down to grab your thighs and push you impossibly deeper into him. "you know how fuckin' much i want to put a ring on your finger?"
"satoru, i-" you try to say, but his mouth is on yours before you can finish your sentence. and a couple seconds later, more words are waterfalling out of him.
"fuck, baby, you have no idea. i fucked up, but i swear i've changed. c'mon, give me one chance, i-"
"mummy? daddy?"
you and satoru both flinch and whip your heads towards the door when you hear your daughter's voice, preparing to make up some far-fetched story to tell her besides we were fucking.
thankfully, the universe allows you two seconds to cover yours and satoru's bodies with a blanket before your daughter opens the door and pokes her head inside. "i heard noises."
you look at satoru for help making up an excuse, and thankfully he has one ready to go. 
"oh, we were just watching a movie," he lies, running a hand through his hair. "go back to bed, kiddo. we'll tuck you back in in a second, yeah?"
your daughter looks at you before looking back at satoru and nodding. 
"close the door, please!" you call as she turns to leave. when the door shuts behind her, you let out a long exhale and bury your head in satoru's chest.
and to your horror, the door opens once more.
your daughter looks at you with shiny, curious eyes. "mommy, are you and daddy back together?"
satoru saves you from having to answer that impossible question with a laugh, wrapping his arm around your shoulders and pulling you closer. "go back to bed, pumpkin. i'll be there to tuck you in."
ten seconds after the door shuts for what you hope is the final time, you turn and glare at satoru. "you're gonna tuck her in?"
satoru scoffs in mock disbelief, raising his eyebrows and pointedly looking you up and down. "if you wanna tuck in our four year old daughter covered in my cum, be my guest."
you nudge his arms off of you and bury your face in a pillow, groaning softly. "fuck you, satoru."
"love you too, sweetheart."
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ziracona · 1 year
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The Darkness really is the best song in the show.
#not musically. like as far as sheer Song goes it’s probably It Was A Shit Show or something but for like. emotion and rarity? I’ve never#ever seen someone confront that really ugly side to mental illness and it’s done so well. like yeah. it can become your identity to be ill#and you can fear losing it and it becomes a parasitic relationship that’s killing you and that’s not good and it’s hard to talk about —#almost impossible. because like. you /know/ how bad ‘what if without this I’m not interesting anymore and people have no reason to worry so#they have no reason to care about me’ is as a statement like that’s fucked up to think and feel. but it’s also not malicious or really you#it’s a part of being sick and people who haven’t been don’t understand it which makes it scary to try to confront and best because it makes#you sound so horrible—it makes you sound horrible to /yourself/ and that makes it hard even for you to confront it alone because you have to#admit it to kill it. I got so sick when I was dying of an ED and my brain got so fucked I began to believe with intense primal terror that#it had become so much of my identity nobody would care about me without it. which makes no sense but to a dying addicted head it did. and#I’ve never seen someone confront and discuss that ugliness so openly or so sympathetically at the same time. the line ‘for so many years ive#used the Darkness to feel. But now there are things in my life that are actually real. I’ve got to make a choice darling don’t ask me why.#But will I have the strength? to tell the darkness…goodbye…’ I cry.#it applies to a lot under that. to trauma associated with social neurodivergence where you learn to fear feeling happy as a kid because you#get loud or too much or things you don’t understand enough to not do them so the only way to be safe from repercussions is to not /be/ happy#in the first place. it applies to having clinical depression you’ve survived alone since childhood and your way of making it through life is#so intrinsically tied to coping with depression you have no idea what you’d be without it. it’s learned self-hatred of a cluster B needing#to hate themself to keep back the world flooding them when they feel at risk by doing it first#and it’s not pretty and it’s not easy but it is so fucking important people admit this is such a fucking common thing with serious mental#illness. how are we to get through self hatred and hopelessness and despair if we can’t even see the things we think are too bad to face are#as common a symptom as cutting? and just as curable and forgivable and not representative of who we are#god I love that song#crazy ex-girlfriend
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scientia-rex · 25 days
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I feel like disappointment in Biden is baffling to me because he was always a disappointment. He was the asshole who got to ride to power on the coattails of a better man. He told bizarre and repeated lies (despite getting caught at it and his team telling him not to) about having a Welsh coal miner dad when he did not and he stole that story from actual Welsh people. I read a profile of him years back that pointed this out and told the story of the time he straight up ignored good advice from an expert not to plant a certain kind of tree too close together and flew a bunch of them out to plant, at night because he was just too fucking excited about it, and they all died. He’s not a smart man! He’s charismatic ish and lacks principles and as far as I can tell doesn’t really care about abortion rights or a lot of things we’d consider pretty critical to preserving freedom. I sincerely thought he couldn’t become President because there were so many obviously better candidates in the pool. I underestimated the sexism and antisemitism in American politics, and when he became the candidate in 2020 I gritted my teeth and voted for him because the alternative was a man who is not only an idiot but also profoundly dangerous. Trump is not ha-ha crazy, he’s Mussolini crazy. He is not dangerous because he’s stupid, although that doesn’t help; he’s dangerous because he does not care about anyone except himself under any circumstances and if that means he lets the far right push us straight into forced birth for white women and sterilization for women of color he’s going to do that. If that means conversion therapy for queers and death penalty for homosexual acts he’s going to do that. He has literally no limits. If he gets back into power, a whole lot of people are going to die, again. It’s not a hypothetical because it happened the first time and he’s only going to get worse.
I am not, never have been, and never will be a fan of Biden. To pretend that he and Trump are in any way equivalent is wrong at best and another goddamn Russian psy-op at worst. To pretend that a third party candidacy is viable in the US is to completely ignore every election of your lifetime and your parents’ lifetimes, and to further ignore the lesson of Ross Perot.
You cannot save Palestinians by not voting for Biden in November; the best you can do is chip away at his margin, and the worst you can do is see Trump elected so he can decide to do the worst possible thing in ever circumstance. Biden has Palestinian blood on his hands and watching this when we could have had Bernie or Elizabeth Warren instead is maddening. (I would have preferred Hillary to Trump, but I don’t think she’d be any different than Biden here. They’re both old-school politicians.)
I hate everything about this, and I hate that saying “maybe don’t put the man who literally said he would kill his political enemies in power” is seen as supporting genocide. It’s acknowledging reality. Joe Biden as a person can eat rocks for all I care. I was kind of hoping he’d die sooner in his term so we’d have time to get used to and then vote for President Harris. (Remember when the line was “she’s a cop, don’t vote for her”? Funny how there’s always a reason not to vote for a woman or a person of color or someone you just “don’t like” and can’t put a finger on why except she “seems angry.” Oh does she. How would she not? When Michelle fucking Obama, the picture of grace , STILL got called angry for having the nerve to be a Black woman with an opinion? When Hillary Clinton lost to a man with no political experience to her decades and who openly discussed sexually assaulting women? Would you have voted for President Harris? Or would you let Trump win again because you don’t LIKE her personally and she’s made decisions and statements you disagree with?)
Biden has both less power than his critics give him credit for and more power than his fans give him credit for. He needs to do more to pressure Israel and although it’s a delicate diplomatic situation I’d rather see us fuck up our diplomatic relationship with Israel than watch more Palestinians get murdered for things like “wanting to eat” and “existing.” The line has been crossed, and he doesn’t see it. Because he wasn’t the best person for the job. Because they didn’t get elected, because of sexism/antisemitism/racism. Hell, I have no idea what bootlicker Pete Buttegieg would have done here, but I’d have given him a try. But no. We got Biden and we’re stuck with this reality where you can be as leftist as you want and still have to look at the situation and decide whether you’re comfortable contributing to a Trump victory through inaction. I want socialism—I want every single person on Earth to have clean drinking water, enough safe food, shelter, medical care, and education—and I’m going to vote for Biden, pissy as it makes me, because the only actual alternative is so, so much worse, for me personally as both a woman and a queer, and for everyone in America and the rest of the world who Trump would find reasons to hurt. What do you think the man who openly and repeatedly praises dictators is going to do when those dictators massacre their own people? Yes, we need to care about this genocide now. We also need to care about all of the other people who are at real risk, both at home and abroad. Would a Trump government agree to fund military intervention in Haiti without insisting on it being a colonial exercise in power? Would a Trump government roll back the restrictions on discriminating against transgender patients in healthcare? How would Trump respond if Orban started dragging people into the streets and shooting them en masse? How would Trump respond if China finally went for it and invaded Taiwan? There are more lives at stake here than mine or yours or even those of the Palestinians, who have deserved better for literally decades and are being mass killed in ways that should result in immediate sanctions, a war crimes trial, and the execution of Netanyahu.
The world deserves better from you than complicity in a Trump victory.
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zyk1ng · 6 months
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I was gonna make this post way way earlier but I forgot lol but Uhm
I have played through the splatoon 2 story fully and am replaying it (for a future post bc a lot of the dialogue is rlly funny) and honestly while I absolutely loved it it makes me even sadder that splat 2’s story mode was kinda tossed aside (for valid reasons ofc) because it’s so Cool.
Excluding the gameplay, I think they did marie so well, because she sells the desperation of someone who’s got nobody she knows by her side. While she of course keeps the sassy attitude of sneak dissing her best friends (agent 3) and also telekinetically telling you to fuck off if you talk to her too much it’s very clear she genuinely cares so much about agent 4 and is so grateful they’re doing what they do.
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these are only two screenshots of 8(?) of Marie randomly being really sentimental to 4 because this stranger chose to help her in her time of need rather than just ignore this GROWN WOMAN hanging out on a sewer drain
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It’s like heavily emphasized multiple times that Marie could not be more grateful for 4’s help in retrieving not just the zapfish but also her cousin.
But then revealing that 4 knew about Callie the WHOLE TIME (I have a lot to say about this part but it’s mostly hc so) which is so KIND OF THEM???? this random woman recruits them into a secret military agency and hides the fact she rlly misses her cousin but they help anyway bc they WANT TO. (They didn’t even know either of them were famous btw) Marie shows a lot of gratitude toward 4 ESPECIALLY after the big reveal.
(You could make arguments for 3 being similar bc an old kook made them do it but this isn’t about them..)
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And it’s not just being grateful for the one time, she genuinely enjoys 4’s company and wants to be better friends with them and chat after the zapfish and Callie are saved 😭😭😭
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It’s so cute too, because 100%ing the game and even just being a little nosy is something that Marie picks up on, and remembers way later in the game. (More abt this later)
god I love this socially inept squid woman and her adopted child soldier that likes finding pieces of paper
Speaking of said soldier! I think the way they characterized 4 via the actual gameplay rather than art/statements/whatever is so cool
4 doesn’t have many illustrations besides the chaos splatfest and that one group photo where they’re being funky in the corner (and the apartment) but I feel like the reason for that is the fact that a lot of Marie’s dialogue as well as how splatoon 2’s hero mode is structured/designed speaks a lot about how they wanted to represent 4.
From a realistic standpoint, of course splatoon 2’s story mode has to be more creative both prompt wise and secret wise. But it feels like the reason its that way is because both 4 and Marie are separate types of people from Craig and 3.
The bosses help a lot with this too, being more gimmicky and weird (subtracting stamp.) Octo shower and samurai being bosses where you have to either react well or change your positioning to effectively beat them. (Octo shower is my fave btw I loved fighting it the first time)
The level design also shines in this aspect because if I’m honest I remember none of the splat 1 levels significantly besides the few octoling ones. Splatoon 2’s levels are very detailed (and also insanely pretty) and have some rlly fun puzzles in a handful of them and even the more fast ones are a blast to play through
And then all the little extras (sardiniums and scrolls alike) are hidden so well and you usually have to go out of your way to find them and even the secrets that aren’t either of those things have substance
Small note, a lot of extras are also made so that it flows well with the levels design (like the first dualie request mission) which is also extremely fucking cool.
the way marie touches on those little discoveries is so smart too because it (as I said before) characterizes 4 as someone who loves to look for things even if it’s on a whim especially since the sunken scrolls in the game are so much harder to find than in splat1.
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And the fact that unlike splat 1, you can (technically) 800% the game by playing EVERY SINGLE LEVEL WITH EVER SINGLE WEAPON TYPE. to me it feels like it deepens the fact that 4 likes to be really thorough. marie goes “you have a problem.” When you break like two hidden egg crates in this one level and it’s so great.
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I love what they’ve done with 4, whether it was intentional or I’m over-analytical.
Nothing gets past them, looking in every nook and cranny whether or not there’s secrets to be found. They’re too nosy and thorough and they like to be around marie after completing missions, they don’t know who the squid sisters are, hate balloons, may or may not be ok, have impulsive secret finding, partake in many extracurriculars, can be needy at times, go with the flow and they apparently smell better than agent 3.
Agent four, of the New Squidbeak Splatoon.
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cybertronic69 · 8 months
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:p savage starlight
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you and ellie, for some reason, never got along very well. you would say you two pretty much hated each other. ellie would say you're the prettiest thing she's ever seen the same. and today you two got paired up for patrol.
warnings: enemies to lovers , loser!ellie , nerd!ellie , sub!ellie , nipple sucking (e!receiving) , clit rubbing (e!receiving) , thigh riding (r!receiving)
"come on! we gotta go..." ellie is impatiently knocking on your door. when you open it with a grumpy expression, she sighs. "hey, dumbass, we're patrolling together today."
"why the fuck do they keep pairing us up together?" you mumble as you start to walk with ellie right by your side.
"don't know, don't care, i could just go without you." ellie says and that's an absolute lie. patrolling with you is the best part of her week. she doesn't want you to know that. you just roll your eyes at that as you both keep walking in the streets of jackson.
ellie stays silent for a few seconds. "i just realized something. you suck" she blurts out like you asked.
"oh, yeah? why?" usually you'd just ignore her but today was a boring day so she might as well be useful and entertain you.
"yeah." she stated plainly. "i can name a thousand reasons why you suck."
you let out a snicker. "go on..."
"alright. number one. you're an annoying little shit with a punchable face." ellie blurts out with a bland expression. she was hoping this could get a reaction out of you. like some curses being thrown at her. she was kinda into it. she also doesn't want you to know that. you chuckle at her words. you think she's actually kind of funny. you dont want her to know that.
"number two. you're always making dumbass statements that piss me off." ellie's eyes are focused on every little movement of your face.
"really?" you raise an eyebrow "name one."
"well for starters, when we first met you said that a dinosaur with horns called 'triceratops' was a unicorn." she narrows her eyes at you.
"who cares..." you let out a dramatic sigh. "they're all fucking dead anyways"
"i care. number three. i want to punch you in the face when you give me that dumb look of yours." she says, rolling her eyes.
you snicker. you really do give her a dumb look sometimes. pisses her off. at least that's you think. "anything else?"
"of course. i have a list of your habits in my notebook that annoys me." she snarks.
"i think you a crush on me ellie... did you ever think about that?" you whisper in teasing tone and give her a smug grin like you just got her.
"god no. number four. the way you walk pisses me off." she's not looking at you this time.
"just admit it... it's obvious you're obsessed with me." your eyes sparkle with mischief. "didn't you just say you write about me in your little love diary or whatever?"
"notebook. i said notebook." she says as her breath starts to hitch.
"yeah, yeah... notebook, diary.... whatever" you roll your eyes. "doesn't change the fact that you think about so much that you have to write about it."
she turns a bright shade of red and suddenly stops walking. "can you... just shut up? your voice is annoying. that'd be number five."
"that's pathetic, you know that? you liking me" you tease as you watch her face getting even more flushed.
"dude. i dont like you. i literally can't stand you. shut up." she mumbles as she looks away.
"ok. so you totally despise me, right?" you whisper as you slowly walk closer to her.
ellie feels like she's about to pass out. you smell so good. your skin looks so soft. your lips- "y-yes." she stutters. "i hate you." she can't even look you in the eyes anymore. her gaze is glued to the ground.
you can't help but chuckle. god, was she a mess. "yeah?" you hold her chin with your index finger, making her look at you. ellie blushed profusely. she was unable to utter any words as she look up at you, her face flushed.
"pussy." you whisper against her face.
she turns her head away again and closes her eyes hard. "shut up." she mumbles.
"can't even admit it to yourself..." you gently caress her cheek. "tell me the truth."
she stays silent for a few seconds and takes a deep breath. "...i've liked you ever since you said that a triceratops was a unicorn."
"that's cute." you smile at her. it wasn't a mocking grin like she'd usually get from you. it was a true soft smile that made ellie's heart beat faster.
"um... shut up..." she mumbles awkwardly. she can't belive she just said that to you.
"is that the best comeback you could come up with?" you gently brush her hair out of her pretty face.
ellie blushes at your soft touch and finally looks up at you again. "maybe it is. i'm not very good with comebacks. or anything, really."
"you were good at roasting me back there." you twirl a lock of her hair in between your fingers. "but i guess you had a lot of time to think about it beforehand..."
"yeah. i... to be honest.. i think about you a lot." she whispers and closes her eyes at your gentle touch. oh, she was cute. her cheeks were still pink and her pretty lips were slightly quivering from the tension in the air.
you gently press your lips against her cheek. "what do you think about?"
when she feels your soft lips on her skin she really really has to try her best to hold in a moan. "well usually, i think of, uh." she seems hesitant to say anything."i think of how pretty i think you are." she continues, now looking up at you. "sometimes, I think about how much i want to kiss you."
the corners of your mouth slightly curl up in a little smile. "yeah? what else?"
"i uh.." ellie is speechless for a moment. then, she begins to speak quietly. "i think about how much I love hearing your voice."
"i'm pretty sure you said my voice is annoying..." you tease but a soft smile is still plastered on your face.
ellie looks down at the ground. "i mean...your voice is annoying when you say stupid things." she teases back, in a attempt to hide her blush. despite her best efforts, her face was still red. "but, your voice sounds pretty when you say certain things."
"what things?" you start to trace little invisible circles on her cheek.
"well, um.." she begins to whisper, softly. "your voice is pretty when you say my name."
"really?" you press a kiss on her cheek. "ellie." a kiss on her forehead. "ellie." a kiss on her temple. "ellie." a kiss on her chin. "ellie..." you stop right in front of her lips.
she couldn't speak for a moment, as your touch made her even more flustered. "yeah... it's pretty when you say it like that." she whispers softly.
"do you want a kiss?" you whisper in a tone just as soft.
"what-" she's taken aback by the question, and she feels herself blush even more. "uh, yeah?" she managed to whisper, very quietly. you gently lock lips with her, and ellie instantly moans when she feels your hot tongue against hers. she gently holds your face with her hands as you caress her hair during the kiss. when you both pull back out of breath, you see her lips wet with saliva as she's trying to recompose herself. she looks way too cute... you're only human. you get closer to her again and gently suck on her bottom lip.
ellie let out a noise in between a groan and a whimper at this. "can i... can i have another one?"
"yeah... you can... later... when we're back... " you plant a soft peck on her cheek and start walking. "there's something i want to give you."
she looks extremely flustered with all of this. "oh... okay." she tries to hold back a smile when you offer your hand to her. she takes it. "what is it that you want to give me?"
you couldn't wait. "just walk..." you say in a soft voice.
"uh... make yourself at home." ellie awkwardly says as the both of you get to her room. that was your idea, of course.
"nice place..." you whisper as you look around. comic books, video games and little action figures were all over the place. god, she was such a nerd.
"thanks..." she's nervous and you can feel it. you have to do something about that.
"oh... savage starlight, huh?" you dont know who the fuck savage starlight is but ellie, on the other hand, has tons of these comic books lying around.
her eyes shine. "oh yessss!" she smiles excitedly at you. "do you read that too?"
you shake you head and can't help but smile with her. so cute. god. "no... is it cool?"
ellie grabs a few comic books and pat the spot on the bed next to her. "so cool... here. let me show you" when you sit by her side, you notice a pair of glasses at her nightstand, and your heart beats faster. she wears glasses. oh. my. god. ellie notices you looking. "ah yeah... i have to wear those when i read... helps with headaches."
you grab the glasses and gently put it on her face. "since you're reading now..."
ellie blinks and swallows hard. "y-yes... so savage starlight..." she starts talking. "it's about her adventures in space... i like it because starlight is pretty cool." ellie then turns to you, tilts her head, and adds in a small whisper. "kind of like you." she said and then continued. "also..." you had to fuck her. all that talk about her nerdy stuff, and how she looked with those glasses, and how her fingers traced the pages of the comic book, and... "...and then she discovered like... a way to travel faster... with a jump drive..." ellie keeps talking and don't even notice your lustful gaze at her.
you lay your head on her shoulder and pretend to pay attention the comic book. "a jump drive, els?" you whisper softly.
"yeah... and the bad guys are called the t-" her voice cracks when she feels you planting a hot kiss on her neck." the travelers...."
"yeah? what else?" you bury your face on her neck.
ellie takes a deep breath. "they're like... aliens..." she bites her lip hard when she feels another kiss on her neck. "a-and... they want to..."
you sit in her lap, straddling her thigh. "they want to...?"
she stares up at you with the most miserable look ever known to man plastered on her face. "...want to destroy... the earth..."
you start to firmly massage her shoulders that are really tense. "so savage starlight is going to beat them up?"
ellie presses her lips in a thin line, scared to let any noises come out. then she starts talking again. "yeah... her name is daniela star... she's... a doctor..."
"hmmm..." you peck her jaw.
"and... and then..." she takes a deep breath.
"and then what?" you slowly start to move your hips on her thigh, back and forth.
ellie's hands immediately get to your hips, and she buries her head on your shoulder. she takes another deep breath. god, you're evil. "and then... like... the travelers have this technology..." you suck hard on her neck, and she groans. "and... starlight... is now friends with..." ellie's voice is whiny, shaky, and breathy. "...with this one guy... he's the captain of...." you slide one hand down her body and cup her pussy. "....nngh... a... s-spaceship..." she shuts her eyes hard.
you lick your lips. "spaceship, huh?" you squeeze her chest as you bite her neck.
ellie digs her fingers into your hips. she's panting, her face is hot and she feels like she's about to faint. "....u-um..."
"keep talking, els... im interested..." you smile against her neck.
"t-the spaceship... crashes... but they survivenngh...." her voice turns into a whine when you start to rub your clothed cunt against her thigh even harder. "o-oh... i... i like the-the way... i-i, i-i like... i-i like th-that you're u-up on m-me... right now."
"yeah? you like it? can i make you like it even more...?" you press a kiss on her ear. "hm?"
"y-yes... yes please..." she whines. you lock lips with her, and ellie lets out a noise again. you're full on feeling her up now, your hands touching, cupping, and squeezing every part of her body.
"is this okay?" you whisper softly as your hands start to slowly lift her shirt up. "how far can i go?"
she takes a deep breath so her words won't be sloppy. "you can do whatever you want with me..."
you feel your pussy clench at her words. "whatever i want?" you whisper in a breathy tone. she was getting to you.
ellie nods. she wrap her arms around you, bringing your body even closer to hers as you're in her lap. "anything..."
"i... wanna take this off..." you gently tug at the hem of her shirt. "and maybe this too..." your fingers trace the buttons of her jeans. ellie nods again, eagerly. she takes her shirt off, and your gaze is now glued to her small, perky breasts. "oh..." you take her pink hardened nipple in between your fingers, and she whimpers. "god..." your mouth starts to water. you push her back in the bed, still mounting her hips. "els... you're too pretty..." you take her nipple into your mouth and gently suck on it. ellie mewls. her hips start to buckle up against yours. she has never felt anything like this before. of course, she would rub one out from time to time... maybe every night... when you sat too close to her... and she could smell the scent of your shampoo... and your knee accidentally touched hers... she had no choice. it's your fault. somehow she'd always end up there, in her bed, late at night, biting the pillow with two fingers moving back and forth inside her tight cunt. but it never felt this good... "els..." you whisper and she looks down at you with glossy eyes, her glasses almost slipping off her nose. "wanna fuck you..." she can't even say anything anymore. she just nods eagerly again as little gasps escape her lips. your body is completely on top of hers, you hips lined up with her left thigh. "lets do it like this..." you start kissing her neck again as your hand slips under her jeans. "raise your thigh..." ellie is complete mess right now so it takes a while for her to take your words in. she raises her thigh, pressing it against your cunt. "mmh...yes... im gonna fuck myself on your thigh... and touch this pretty pussy of yours, ok?" you whisper breathlessly in her neck.
ellie whimpers at your words. "y-yes... so... g-g..."
you whimper with her. "so good, right, baby?" you're pressing your clothed cunt against her thigh and gasp when ellie moves her body with you, her arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer. ellie is a whimpering mess when you slowly start to rub her little clit with a light amount of pressure. her hips are trembling and she has her face buried in your neck, her lips brushing against your skin. you're desperate. it feels too good to be close to her like this. you wanna make her cum. you wanna cum. and just like that, like she was reading your mind, ellie presses her thigh even harder against your pussy and you moan. you quicken the pace of your fingers on her clit and she cries out. her veiny hands grip hard on your hips moving them on her thigh. you cry out too.
ellie starts babbling. "want... you to... fucking... sit... on my face... wanna taste your pussy... so fucking bad..." she rolls her hips against your hand.
"yeah?" you whisper in breathy tone cause now you can't stop staring at her pretty lips without picturing them wrapping around your clit and sucking it.
"nngh... yeah.... so bad..." she grunts. "oh fuck... im g-gonna cum" her eyes are tearing up when she throws her head back. "cum with me... please..." she whimpers.
you nod desperately as you grind you pussy against her thigh even harder, the fabric of her jeans rubbing right on your clit. "im c-close, els..."
"shit... are you?" she whispers with the same desperate expression as you. "please, babe... cum with me..." she grabs your ass and presses your pussy against her thigh even faster. you bite her shoulder when you feel your orgasm hitting you and that was all ellie needed. she came hard on your fingers with a loud curse leaving her lips. you're both panting as you take your slick covered hand off ellie's jeans. her gaze is following your every moment so when you take your fingers inside your mouth and moan she moans with you. you kiss her lips with your fingers still inside your mouth. it's kinda nasty... and disgusting... and everything else on the book but ellie doesn't mind. in fact she seems very eager to do more of these nasty things with you in the future. and so are you.
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deeversuswords · 25 days
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‧˚₊ Shotgun in his car
pairing: bakugou katsuki/f!reader summary: random thoughts about Katsuki and driving word count: ~800 words contains: slight nsfw, mostly fluff, aged-up • ao3 link a/n: I blame this song for putting the thought in my already "crying over bakugou katsuki on a daily basis" brain. before I kick myself out, as a bonus "thought": rolled-up sleeves. enjoy 🧡
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Bakugou Katsuki, your boyfriend who pulls up in front of U.A after getting his driver’s license, where you’re supposed to meet up with him, and whistles at you, the sharp tune a shared secret. His proud grin widens when your head jerks up and all you manage is half a curse in his direction as you startle. He knows the words died on your tongue at the sight of him in the driver seat of a car you don’t recognize. Of course not, it was his parents’ gift for his eighteenth birthday, one he hid from you for this very moment. He melts inside when you climb in, throw your arms around his neck, and smother his face with kisses as you squeal out your congratulations. Putting up with all the dumb instructions from his driving instructor was worth it if this was his reward.
Bakugou Katsuki whose strides hold more arrogance when he returns to the dorms and waves his driver's license to everyone. He was the first to turn eighteen, and now, he’s the first with a driver's license. His chuckles resonate just right when your friends groan exasperated and complain how they have to wait, but congratulate him nonetheless and wiggle their eyebrows because Katsuki with a license means a free drive. Wrong.
Bakugou Katsuki plays taxi driver for no one except you. You—the reason why those free drives he vehemently denies become a thing. When you ask him, pretty eyes peering into his, Katsuki thinks “Hell no”, but his mouth says, “Whatever. Fine.” And there are rules. No eating or drinking. Wear a seatbelt. Don’t be obnoxiously noisy. And the strictest of them all: no one, not even his parents, is allowed to sit in the passenger seat. Hell breaks loose on anyone who tries. “That’s my girl’s seat. Get in the back”—not a statement, but an order. It’s that same seat that becomes the first thing he modifies in his car with his first paycheck. Every last yen goes into the best material, best cushion, best everything because your comfort is his. And it’s so fucking worth it when you cuddle up in your new seat with a big smile on your face and love is all he feels when you say, “God, Kat. You’re spoiling me too much” and pull him by his collar into a mind-numbing kiss.
Bakugou Katsuki and driving with one hand, a habit born out of a passing comment you made about how hot he looked when he did that. His brain rewired on your words, spoken in a nearly whiny tone. But with the rewiring came a whole lot of other things. Like his free hand resting on your thigh. Sometimes his fingers trace random patterns and innocently knead and pinch. Other times, they glide higher and tease, twitch with need when your legs instinctively spread for more of what only he can give you. It is for that reason that Katsuki memorized where in the city the secluded places were. Once his name passes your lips on a breathy moan, he knows no driving, only how to pull over and make you come all over his fingers.
Bakugou Katsuki who finds an outlet in driving late at night when stress gets to him and sleep is being a bitch. Becomes his routine, and slowly yours too. “You’re more important than my sleep, Kat. I’m right there with you,” you told him one night when he got angry at himself for daring to disturb your sleep for the third time that week. He kissed you right after, hungrier than ever, insatiable for your love and everything you meant to his world. Katsuki didn’t care that you wore only a T-shirt—one of his old ones—as he dragged you out of your shared apartment and into his car after allowing you a minute to put shoes on. That drive was a learning experience so now, among the many things crowding his calendar, are the nights promising a clear sky. Because he needs a repeat of his car parked on some random grassy field on the outskirts of the city. To watch you beam at the starry sky above and drown in your joy as you tug on the sleeve of his T-shirt, pointing at the constellations and naming what he already knows because Katsuki always listens when it’s you. Eventually, he silences you with a kiss, his love burning too bright and too hot; it overwhelms him. His head spins and spins. It’s a blur that temporarily clears when you finally ease down on him in the backseat of his car, your gaze locked with his lovesick one, hands grabbing everywhere they can. It’s the only time when Katsuki goes against your wishes of fucking you hard. Not a romantic in the literal sense of the word, but the way everything gravitates together in the moment changes his usual pace into something softer. He makes love to you. Heart wide open, soul bare.
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irb-pascalito-99 · 1 month
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Catch Me If You Can
Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader
Word Count: 2.4k
Rating: 18+ MDNI
Warnings: Smut, teasing, unprotected p in v, come play
Summary: Joel’s girl can’t stop staring at him while he’s fixing the table they broke.
A/N: This is an excerpt from Chapter Thirteen of my fic Always an Angel, Never a God. To read more of this pairing visit a03.
I lean back and watch the muscles in Joel’s back flex as he drills new bolts into the table. Beads of sweat roll down his arms and create dark patches on his t-shirt. I crawl toward him and kiss his neck as he puts the drill down.
“I think you should do this with your shirt off,” I mumble against his skin.
My hands slide underneath his shirt, trailing up his stomach and chest. Joel chuckles. He leans back slightly to give me better access.
I grab the hem of his t-shirt and pull it over his head. He lifts his arms as I do. Joel allows me a couple more kisses before he starts to work on the table again.
I chew on my bottom lip while I watch him. Joel doesn’t have defined abs or the form of a bodybuilder, but there’s no mistaking he has muscles. His arms and back flex as he picks up another table leg to screw into place.
I offered help when he started, but he wouldn’t allow it. Now, he focuses on the task at hand. His eyebrows crease as he bolts the leg into place. He shakes it firmly to assure it is strong before moving on to the next one. He looks over his shoulder to see me still staring at the definition in his arms and back.
“Careful now, I’ll start thinkin’ you only want me for my body,” he jokes with a wink in my direction.
“I like you for more than your body,” I lean back against a nearby wall while Joel searches for the bolts for the next leg.
“Oh really, like what?” He asks. I roll my eyes at his obvious attempt for compliments, but happily play into it.
“Well, turns out you’re good at making furniture,” I joke. He laughs and shakes his head before screwing in the next bolts.
I could think of a million reasons why I like Joel. He’s unbelievably generous. He’s smart, but he doesn’t rub your face in it. He’s amazing with Sarah, and so understanding with Ellie. He’s the kind of man who fucks you so hard against a table it breaks, and then spends the next afternoon putting it back together again. When he pauses with the drill again I continue with an honest answer to his question.
“You make me feel safe,” I say. He puts the drill down and turns his full attention to me. “I don’t have to pretend to be anyone else. I can fall apart a little around you. You make me feel safe.”
I keep my eyes on the ground. I don’t want to see Joel’s reaction to my statement. I don’t want to know if it’s too much too soon. We sit in silence until he picks up the drill again.
“You make me feel safe too,” He says. I lift my eyes from the floor. He fumbles with the screws in his hands. “I’ve been focused on Sarah for so long. It’s nice to be able to let go a little sometimes, have somethin’ for myself you know?”
My heart flutters at the notion of being something he holds for himself, that I could be as important to him as he is to me. I know Joel loves deeply, and Sarah will always be the biggest thing in his life, but I hadn’t thought of how lonely it must have been for him over these last several years.
Obviously Sarah’s mom leaving had left a hole in their family, but Joel lost more than a co-parent. He lost a partner, a wife. He’s never talked about her in a romantic sense. He hasn’t mentioned her at all since the hospital. I haven’t wanted to push him into opening up, but something about this conversation feels different. It feels as though he’s offering me something here.
“Did you have that with Annie?” I ask. Joel’s shoulders tense, and I fear I may have misread things. “Was it ever just easy?”
Joel focuses on drilling the screws into the final leg before he answers me. My heart thumps in anxiety. I shouldn’t have pushed. The weekend was going so well. Why did I have to push my luck?
“I guess it was for a minute there, when we were just young kids livin’ our lives,” He examines his work, shaking the table legs again as he continues explaining. He doesn’t look at me while he talks. “She got pregnant so early into our relationship though, so it didn’t stay like that for long.”
I debate on leaving it like that. Joel is clearly uncomfortable, but I want to know him better. I hardly know his past at all.
“Why? What happened?” I ask.
Joel rubs his face and then wipes his hands on his jeans. He doesn’t shy away from the topic, but I can tell he wants the conversation to be over. From what I can tell after conversations with Tommy and Sarah, Joel doesn’t talk about Annie with anyone these days. I find that strange coming from a man who’s been so adamant that I open myself up to others.
“It was just a lot of pressure,” Joel grabs one end of the table and turns it back over to stand on it’s legs. “Neither of us knew what we wanted or how to handle it. Our parents were furious. We thought marriage was the best answer but neither of us were ready for it. It was a giant dose of real world issues shoved into our teenage romance, so no it wasn’t ready for long.”
“Tommy mentioned you guys were on your own with all that.” I respond. Joel turns to me with a slightly angered look on his face.
“It’s not Tommy’s place to be sharing that,” he says. I shrink back into the wall slightly. Joel’s anger immediately dissipates after seeing my reaction. “Sorry it’s just, a part of my life I don’t want you to have to deal with.”
I try not to be angry that he chooses to hide that part of his life from me, but I find myself wondering why he doesn’t think he can trust me with it. He seems so keen on knowing my secrets and holding my darkness. I wish he’d let me do the same for him.
He doesn’t give me any more room to press him on the topic, choosing instead to bring the energy in the room back up. He picks me up and carries me over to the table. I squeal and kick my legs in the air, caught off guard by suddenly being thrown over Joel’s shoulder.
When he sets me down he places me on the finished table and stands between my parted knees. He places his hands on the surface of the table bracketing my hips. His lips come forward to meet mine, pulling me in for a deep kiss when he shakes the table roughly again. It stays firm on the ground, no creaking or concerns that it might collapse.
“Now that’s a proper table,” he says with a grin. He pulls me in for another kiss, immediately deepening it and bringing me closer to the edge of the table. As the kiss gets more heated I push him away. “What?”
“We are not fucking on the table again Miller, you just fixed it.” Joel’s big brown eyes morph into a sad pleading expression, but I refuse to cave. Instead I shake my head and cross my arms.
“Oh come on,” He kisses my neck, biting down enough to leave a mark on the skin.
“Joel” I moan and throw my head back. When he moves to the other side of my neck I shake my head to clear it and crawl across the table to the other side.
He stands with his hands still on the table. I grin at him while he gives me a grumpy look on the other side of the wood.
“Not on the table,” I say cheekily.
When he starts to round the corner toward me I run off in the opposite direction, heading for the stairs. I giggle as I hear him start to run after me. I’m halfway up the stairs when I feel his hands grip my waist and pull me off my feet. I kick my feet in the air and squeal.
Joel places my knees on the ground. I grab the edge of the steps in front of me and gasp when he grabs the waistband of my leggings and underwear, pulling both down my thighs. The material gathers at my knees as he fumbles with his belt.
“Joel,” I whine. The tension pulls in my center so much it almost hurts. I can feel the center of my thighs becoming slick as my wetness drips down the inside.
“I know baby. I know, I’ll make it feel better.” Joel yanks his own pants down enough that his cock springs out.
His hard length presses against my back causing me to moan as I press back into him. What started out as playful banter has turned into overwhelming need. Joel runs his fingers along my folds, groaning loudly when he realizes how wet I am.
“Oh darlin’, you need it bad huh?” He mumbles huskily into my ear. I nod my head, pushing myself back against him again.
He chuckles in response as he brings his hand back to his cock. He pushes his length through my folds slowly. I push my body back into his hoping that he’ll begin to fill me. I let out a hiss when the head of his member brushes against my clit before he pulls back again.
After a couple thrusts his cock notches at my throbbing entrance. I’m panting as I wait for him to press forward, on the verge of tears from anticipation. He kisses my shoulder while he pushes just the tip inside and freezes again.
“Please, please, please, plea-” I beg, cut short from the delicious stretch of his cock inside me. I throw my head back on his shoulder as he thrusts forward. His hands grip my hips to hold me still while I tremble around him.
Once he’s filled me to the brim he pauses to let me adjust. My pussy flutters around his pulsing length. I could probably come just from this, but he soon retreats and slams his hips back into mine. He keeps his pace slow, but his thrusts hard and deep. Each one pushes the breath out of my lungs.
“Fuck, Joel.” I moan as he thrusts in again. “It feels so good, you feel so good inside me.”
“Yeah?” He pants. His hands slip on my hips as he struggles to maintain his grip through the combined sweat of our bodies. Words are becoming increasingly more difficult as the pleasure builds so I nod my head in response.
I feel my core tighten and clench around Joel’s cock. He groans and starts to thrust harder and slightly faster. His hand slips around my front to start making small circular motions on my clit. The coil inside me starts to tighten even more, causing me to lurch forward on the stairs.
I rest my forehead on the stairs as I call out for Joel, no longer aware or in control of what I’m saying. Whatever it is, it spurs him on more. My fingers pull at the threads of the carpet on the stairs, undoubtedly pulling chunks out as well, while Joel’s fingers speed and supply more pressure. Something snaps inside me. I scream as I let go. Joel grunts as my pussy throbs around him, and continues working me through my climax.
When I come down my body sags against the harsh angles of the stairs. The only thing keeping my hips from the ground is Joel’s hand wrapped around my waist. I can tell he’s close. His thrusts become sloppier as he moans louder with each one. I feel him pulse inside me and he grunts.
He quickly pulls out and turns my body around on the stairs. Joel’s hands grab the front of the shirt I’m wearing, his shirt I stole off the bedroom floor this morning, and yank it open. Buttons clatter along the walls and railing of the stairs as they fly away.
With my chest and stomach exposed to the open air, Joel brings his hand to his cock. He pulls it rapidly. I watch him through hooded eyes while he moans. His eyes wander over my figure splayed out in front of him. Once he looks up to see my face he lets go with a loud growl. His seed decorates my body in ribbons, continuing to pump his length until he has no more left to give.
He grabs the wall with one hand and the railing with another as he breathes heavily with his head hung. I commit the sight to memory, certain that this is what all the greatest painters in history saw when they decided to capture the beauty of man.
His breathing begins to slow down when he opens his eyes again. He brings them up to me and remains frozen as I trail one hand down to the mess he’s left on my skin. I collect his spend on my fingers and lock eyes with him as I bring it up to my mouth and suck my fingers dry. He looks about ready to collapse from the sight alone.
When I pull my fingers from my lips he leans down and kisses me gently. His tongue licks along my bottom lip before slipping inside my mouth. As he pulls away a string of saliva connects us and then splits, seeking in the coarse hairs of his beard.
He stands up first, pulling his pants back up, and then helps me back to my feet. Joel pulls my leggings and underwear back up for me as I wobble on my legs. I keep my grip on the railing so I don’t fall. Over half the buttons on the shirt I was wearing are now hidden in the carpet of the stairs, so it remains open while I attempt to climb back up the stairs. Joel lets me try for a minute before picking me up and carrying me to bed for a nap.
To read more visit a03.
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