#they got bigger things to worry about than that | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

buttdumplin · 17 hours

Text

A John Price meet-the-fam special!! This is pure, indulgent fluff.

1.2k

CW: gn!reader, latine reader

When Price first meets your family, it goes over smoother than fucking water over a polished worry stone. It just is. You thought it might go like that, knowing that he’d do practically anything to make himself fit in as seamlessly as possible. But you also knew that bringing home a white guy always comes with a very specific brand of first interactions.

You prep him for the teasing that’s to come, about his accent, about his complexion, about the food he eats. John takes it all in very seriously, nodding along and asking probing questions. It’s all for your benefit, and he’s incredibly mindful of that. You don’t necessarily need to know he’s already got a plan of action, though.

By the time you arrive at the family home, you’re a little stiff, braced for the barrage of probing questions that’s to come. You can tell the family is curious, you see the tías eyeing up and down. But there’s no interrogation this time. Because John beats them to it. He’s polite and answers all the niceties as respectfully as he can. And then he immediately launches into offering up information, as cryptic as it may be. He dons that dimpled smile of his and tells them what he can.

“I’ve been at this job for a while now, but I’m retiring soon. It’s actually my personal life that I'm more invested in improving now.”

“I’m hoping to buy a home in the very near future. Maybe like this one, a big family place. I’ve been tucking away money for it for a while now.”

“I’ve had to spend a lot of time away, but I’m really looking forward to staying home with this one.”

The tías are swooning when he makes intense eye contact with you across the table as he speaks. He’s not hiding any kind of intentions, from you or them. None of the information is particularly new to you, but hearing him say it out loud? In front of all the people important to you? It’s one thing when it’s quietly discussed in the early hours of the morning. It’s another thing entirely to hear it all said in such a permanent way.

At one point, your godmother, as entrometida as she always is, mentions she’s willing to go shopping with him if he’s ever in need of a ring, says she’s always had a good eye for your style.

“Oh, no. Se lo agradezco, pero ya no va a ser necesario,” he replies with an even bigger smile, and it’s got the women hollering. They’d take a bite out of him if they could. John carries himself with the firm confidence of knowing who he is, and they can see that. They respect it.

The tías, predictably, also do everything they can to keep you two physically apart. You’re put on comal duty, keeping you in the deep corner of the kitchen where he can’t reach you. John himself doesn’t try to reach for you, wanting to spare you the godforsaken “chiflando y aplaudiendo” even at your big age. So he keeps busy by setting the table, asking only where he can find the cups and tableware. They all ooh and aah.

“Ven? Ni se le tuvo que pedir,” they shout at the tíos, pointing at John’s busy hands.

A few questions do pop up once dinner is set. Do you eat this kind of food? Have you had this before? Do you like it? Tíos razz him into adding more and more salsa on his food, and John, knowing full well how it all ends, goes along with it. He’s managed to build up some tolerance that he’s quite proud of, but there is no way that’s saving him. He knows what he’s in for. A single bite and his face turns so red it’s almost purple, his coughing making it hard for him to get water down. The tíos laugh and he’s smiling along with them, the tías rushing to get more water and napkins and a cup of milk because “I heard this helps white people?” You swap his plate out for a new one while they’re all caught up with John, taking a few bites of food to try to match it to the dish he had before.

A bubble of softness blooms in the room. The tías are cooing over him, consoling him after his “brave attempt.” The tíos take turns patting his back, smiling down proudly at him for having met their challenge. He smiles back at you from across the table, knowing full well what you’ve done to his food, spotting a few more veggies than he’s originally served himself. The tablecloth is long, surely they won’t spot him gently nudging your foot with his own.

When your godfather invites him out onto the porch for a smoke, John knows it’s his time to shine. He asks you to stay inside with a wink. He brought those Cuban cigars with him for a reason, he’s sure he’ll make it through. You hold him at the door for a second longer, just enough to give him a tender kiss before sending him along. Neither of you missed the way your godfather so clearly recognizes the way John moves, his own military past helping read further into the man you’ve brought home. You know there’s a good chance of this not going perfectly.

Ignoring the calls from your tías, you crawl to sit below the window that lets out right behind them. They both let out soft grunts as they settle into their chairs, a long hum of appreciation from your godfather clearly signaling John has opened the cigar box for him. It’s silent for a while. The only sounds come from the lighter and their soft exhalations. Then a soft rustling begins. It’s not the trees, it’s too muted for that. It’s not gravel, they aren’t going anywhere and they certainly didn’t make their getting-up grunts. No, it’s their clothes. Because they’ve come up with hand signs on the spot, across languages, so you can’t listen in.

There’s some chuckling, surely that’s a good sign! But the low sigh coming shortly after isn’t very encouraging. You try to make sense of it somehow, but there’s no distinct rhythm to it. And suddenly you’re twelve again and trying to sneak a peek. You may not need a stool to help you, you’re tall enough to see through the window on your tiptoes. Maybe if you do it slowly, they won’t notice. So slowly it goes, your knees creaking as you inch up. Their rustling continues; good, they haven’t noticed. Yet as stealthy as you try to be, they’re both looking directly at you as you finally get eyes on them. Their smiles all too knowing. You godfather winks at you, clicking his tongue fondly. He holds a hand up before you can say anything, groaning a little as he rises. He takes a beat to look down at John. You’re all frozen for a moment. And then your godfather’s hand comes down firmly on John’s shoulder, giving him a sturdy shake.

“Me meto antes de que la vieja huela todo este humo,” he says. It’s done. No disaster, just acceptance.

When you turn back to John, he’s already got a mad grin on his face, “See? This old white boy’s still got some moves.”

AN: I am buckled the fuck in for all this latine reader content, so yall will be seeing a whole lot more of it. Thank you again to @mikichko!!! For your support and encouragement, and your incredibly generous feedback. I'm doing this to feed us both.

Let me know if yall wanna see anything with latine reader in particular!!

#captain john price #price x reader #price x latine reader #latine reader #cod x reader #cod x latine reader #cod #my only non poly fic to date lmao #but maybe if you squint there's still room for it #and price's spanish?? fucking delicious #uses it so deliberately too #mans knows exactly what he's doing #i didn't realize this would end on the line it did and it made me fucking CACKLE #hope yall enjoy!!

31 notes · View notes

hugsandchaos · 1 day

Text

You know what would be funny in the PenPals AU? If Dash was Alex’s babysitter.

Dash isn’t meant to him or anything, he’s actually really nice to Alex! They watch cartoons together pretty often, and talk about them. I think it’d be funny if one day, at the door, Dash says “wouldn’t it be cool if we watched cartoons with Phantom?” and Alex says “Yeah, but he’s asleep right now and mom says he really needs to rest.”

XD The look on Dash’s face when he looks at the couch and Phantom is fast asleep! In the house! On the couch!

He’s got bandages visible on his arm, so Dash listens and leaves him alone. If he didn’t and went over to him, the first thing Phantom would’ve done when he woke up and saw him is hiss. It was like some really creepy eldritch hiss, too, so it’s effective. Alex goes on to tell him to keep it a secret.

For some reason, Phantom isn’t a big fan of Dash and avoids being touched by him. Then again, he displayed similar behavior with Gerald and Evelyn at first, so they write it off as trust issues with anyone bigger or older than him. They’re kind of right, but it’s also more personal. He failed not having Dash touch him because the moment he found out Phantom saved Gerald, who he appreciates like an uncle, he went for a hug practically out of reflex.

He accidentally popped Phantom’s back like a bunch of firecrackers were in there and when he let go out of worry, Phantom just kinda. Fell to the floor. And now he’s glowing. He’s okay, just processing having his back suddenly popped several times at once, don’t worry.

Eventually, he’ll get used to having Dash around. I imagine that Phantom joins them watching cartoons because Alex invites him over, but he always ends up falling asleep five minutes in. He wakes up when it’s paused, too. Alex doesn’t feel upset or anything because of it, he’ll tell him everything when it’s done.

This is pretty much just an idea, but it’d be pretty cool! Not sure if I’ll add it just yet.

#danny phantom #danny fenton #au #PenPals AU #dash baxter #danny phantom dash

16 notes · View notes

viric-dreams · 2 months

Text

1812: A sailor takes a routine trip to London, unaware that this would be the last time he'd ever see Flanders. Many lasts were soon to follow.

1861: A boy proudly joins on with the Royal Navy, signing his new name for the very first time. This is a first of many ill-advised decisions.

I can lie and say that the last ES has me thinking about what my characters looked like back on the surface, but it's actually because of a WIP sent to me by an artist I will not name.

#my art #ockham #roberts/nite #i always forget that roberts was 13 when he had that whole ship ordeal #or rather i forgot what kids actually look like #and now i feel absolutely terrible about it #he should be skipping down the street with a minecraft backpack #not experiencing The Horrors #and i've decided that surface!ockham probably used he/him #the same one probably still does so but he's in absolutely no state at the moment to communicate his preferences #irrespective of the parabolan reflection #who's got a 'yes' situation going on #but has bigger things to worry about than people's chosen form of address #unnamed artist you know who you are #and if you’re reading this I’m still incredibly unwell about your [redacted] drawing

55 notes · View notes

purple-is-great · 8 months

Text

Also this week i gotta figure out what the hell you wear to a christening (and figure out how masc i can go without causing chaos)

(I'm not against causing chaos i just think maybe my cousin might appreciate me causing chaos some other time than at her baby's christening)

#i mean it's mostly ''if i wear slacks and a blazer will my grandma get confused and ask who that boy is''#hmm or okay i'm gonna wear my brown slacks because i refuse to wear jeans to any nice event #and the black ones are a bit too somber #or well i've got the light grey ones #but slacks yes #i've got a brown women's blazer that looks pretty nice #but the only two shirts that make sense with that are my white button-up and this sorta frilly women's blouse thing #i don't want to wear the frilly one #but i'm a bit worried that slacks/blazer/button-up read as a statement rather than a continuation of me being sort of ambiguously masculine #but not clearly enough that anyone dares to ask about it #because i would prefer to come out with a plan and not because someone asks if i'm going to be bringing a girlfriend to family gatherings #or okay my relatives are probably polite enough to not ask that #but are they polite enough to not gossip about it? we do love our gossip #i mean i'm overthinking this #no one cares and honestly the bigger issue is i do not know how formal i should go

7 notes · View notes

lixbf · 17 days

Text

tommy is already iconic and i love him

#faking interference when the chief is trying to reach him 💕#randomly helping people he hasnt worked with in Years 💕#being realistic about their survival and joking they got bigger things to worry about than getting fired 💕#i kinda want him to join the 118 again like i think thatd be very nice #911 abc

2 notes · View notes

laugtherhyena · 4 months

Text

Sometimes i remember how long it took for Dra to get a full translation and think, wow, if it had a more speedy english translation back in the day (sorta like the one Sdra2 had) and i had my first experience with the game be as intended i don't think i would be writing -2+2 today

#putting this in tags because idk. my self-conscious bitchass tells me that this may ruin the fic for some people #but.#-2+2 started as a hatamori oneshot #the idea i mean #and then i started going “hey wouldn't it be cool if” and the ideas kept piling and piling #and i was like you know what i should make this a bigger thing #and it became a story focused narrative rather than a ship fic #but in it's core it's still the story i started writing out of thinking about my weird little rarepair and going #I NEED TO SHOW THEM MY VISION‼️‼️#and I get to write them living and being nice to eachother #going back to what i was talking about in the post. if my first impression with Dra had been with the full translated game #rather than learning about it from random Wikipedia pages. biased posts and massive spoilers #i am 99% sure i would be an ayakane shipper #cuz like. c'mon #they have so many moments in canon it's crazy #but nooooooo your girl here had to do a fucking 180 and become attached to hatamori instead #and i MEAN attached because when i got back into the another series last year i lost interest in all the ships i liked back in the day #EXCEPT FOR THEM #THEY'RE STILL MY FAVORITE PAIRING IN THE ANOTHER SERIES #and it's wild to me because at this point i don't even remember why i started shipping them to begin with #anyway. if you went through all these tags and feel disapointed don't worry #-2+2 is never gonna get to a point where they're gonna have a love confession and kiss in the mouth #because i want the focus to be the story and the characters rather than the ship itself #but it's still me writing it at the end of the day #so yeah.#hyena ramblings #dra #dra -2+2 #danganronpa another

3 notes · View notes

genderqueer-karma · 1 year

Text

hey so it’s bhm here in the us and i was thinking thoughts earlier. i figured this was a semi-appropriate time to post something like this anyway, so here’s what my brain spat out (in post format!)

my thoughts (as a black person) on that fucking locs wig/headpiece

so. if you’re a fan of malice mizer or are vaguely familiar with them through cultural osmosis of a friend or whomever talking about them, there’s a considerable chance you’ve seen pictures of mana様 wearing this wig*:

yk. the locs.

it goes without saying that this is appropriation of black culture**. my culture. doesn’t take a genius to figure that out.

i’ve seen people (particularly on tiktok, though there have been people in other places) make a big stink over it! and that is valid, for the most part.

however, of the examples i’ve seen of non-black people wearing black cultural styles (and i have seen quite a few), this is probably one of the most tame.

i have seen people try to give themselves “locs”/“dreads” in their own, non afro-textured hair. it has usually turned out to be a matted, unhealthy mess that ultimately has to be cut. that cannot be said of this wig. it is pristine in comparison, which i find to be fascinating! if you look at wigs made to resemble locs, 90% of the time they still look gross and matted. (a common theme… truly peculiar. /sarcasm)

that in particular makes me believe (to a certain extent) that this was not intentionally malicious. so truthfully, it’s hard to demonize it entirely.

with that in mind, i’m not defending this either; trust when i say that i am immensely disappointed to see these things. primarily, that’s because it does bring into question just how safe i am/will be within these fan spaces as a black person. if we cannot call out these things as a community and be in complete understanding with one another about why this is wrong, we cannot progress past it.

however, i find it truly bizarre that people will be frothing at the mouth over this now. it’s been ~20/30 years! beyond that, there’s been no major incidents like this since then!

there is no real reason to continue complaining so frequently about something so old at this point in time, especially when it was not done out of genuine, unadulterated hatred.

sure, we (black fans, in our relatively small number) should maybe be given an apology, but it’s a minor wound at worst, and an apology that is unlikely to happen because of how long ago everything transpired.

i, personally, am more concerned with fans and their issues than mana様 himself. as far as i’m concerned, he’s literally just some guy. he doesn’t even do a lot in the public eye as often as he used to. he just peddles his wares and shit, which is not something i’m worried about.

in essence, yes, 1000%, it’s wrong. yes, we should bring attention to it.

but no, it does not warrant any major action on the part of fans. especially not those who simply wish to white knight and prove they’re “cool” or “woke” for internet brownie points rather than actually ally themselves with the black community on more pressing issues than a 30-year-old wig.

thanks for reading, i guess. happy black history month. actually listen to the black people around you year-round.

***

*(yes, it is a wig/headpiece. i’ve checked multiple times.)

**(i can only speak on my perspective of my culture, but i know others have feelings about other things that mana様 especially has done by way of appropriation.)

***(also, don’t ask me about the braids from early klaha era. i don’t care! re-read the post if you’re that concerned.)

#yo it's d :)#malice mizer #mana sama #don’t get me wrong i respect mana immensely. but i’m critical of his past actions.#but in that same vein. y’all have GOT to chill the fuck out! it’s not life or death! it wasn’t then and it’s not now *30 years later*.#like. at this point i just joke about it! i have no reason to be just crazy upset about it. i have bigger fish to fry than this.#and when i say i joke: i don’t do it to diminish the impact/serious nature of appropriation. i do it to take the sting out of being #disappointed by someone who i look up to. i mentioned the other day that seeing certain things helps me remember that he’s some guy in the #end. that’s still true! if it’s not super recent and doesn’t affect people now i don’t worry about it!#we should all try worrying a bit less about the purity of the things we like.

8 notes · View notes

codgod · 8 months

Text

i have so many thoughts abt desire and corruption of that + wants vs needs etc. as themes throughout all of riptide but i am just not good enough at wording things to properly articulate them

#.txt #like okay. chip wants to find arlin. is that what he really needs?#gillion wants to fulfill the prophecy. but is it really? and is it what’s right?#jay wants to find out what really happened to ava. but is she going to like what she finds?#when these characters finally achieve their goals. when they get what they desire (or think they desire) the most #how happy are they really going to be?#there’s already cracks #bizly mentioned once that chip is in fact scared of meeting arlin again #because he’s worried he’s built him up too much in his mind #as some kind of myth #and the real arlin won’t be who chip thinks he will #gillion is unsure of the prophecy and the elders and everything surrounding what he was raised to believe #jay it’s a bit more complicated. because relatively speaking #she’s a little bit closer to her own goal than the other two #and she’s stayed more steadfast #but she was at least somewhat in denial about the navy being at fault for what happened to ava #then there’s the bigger stuff outside the main 3 #the eastern sea literally got corrupted by desire though it’s unclear why #niklaus is a whole thing #the compass….#‘this could take us where we need to go!’#‘no chip. it can take us where you *want* to go. and i know there’s a difference’#aaaagh. rotating things in my brain

6 notes · View notes

crutchie-morris · 2 years

Text

canning is fucking hard as shit y’all

#we discovered that the people who lived in this house before us planted a grape vine! so I said oh I’ll make jelly #i picked the grapes yesterday because they were already overripe and we had to use them or lose them #and then I sorted them to only use the least overripe ones and squished and cooked them down yesterday #then bought mason jars and pectin today only to find that our pot is too short to sterilize the jars #so I need either smaller jars or a bigger pot #so I decided to just strain the juice for tonight and worry about the jar thing tomorrow #which straining the juice took forever and made an absolute disaster mess of my kitchen #so I cleaned that up finally after straining juice forever #also once I got all the solids out I have less than 4 cups of juice. from three and a half pounds of grapes!!!#so i don’t even have enough grape juice for the jelly recipe I was using now because ????? our grapes didn’t have any fucking juice in????#i might just go buy strawberries tomorrow and make refrigerator jam and give up on the grapes #i just need some kind of win on this stupid canning front #or I could buy a bigger pan and try to keep trucking on the grapes but that seems. really fucking annoying.#maybe I’ll just add a buttload of sugar and call it grape juice and my roommates and I can all taste it and go ‘hmm that tastes bad’#and then throw it away #or I could save myself the time and dump it down the sink now!!! also a choice!!!#anyway. in terms of jelly we have no jelly despite MANY HOURS OF EFFORT #just kidding it was like three #but that’s still too many hours to have nothing to show for it #delaney talks to statues

3 notes · View notes

threadmonster · 2 years

Text

I bought a gba sp. Now I want a DSi. And now, I want a fucking CRT tv (╥﹏╥)

#{domino talks}#i'm so fucking salty about past me gifting my dsi to my friend since i have 2 3ds's #because i think she doesn't even care about me anymore since she left me on read several times in a row until i was like :/#and now i wanna play ds games and they look WEIRD on the 3ds because the pixels display different #i really wish there was a way for me to steal That Guy's ds lite #which sounds like what the hell but no no no worries it's again me being fucking salty #AND CRT TVs GUYS ( ；∀；)#vhs's and old games on crt TV's is my jam #i wish when i got a flat screen i kept my old tv (╥﹏╥) but there was no place to put it #honestly try playing a n64 game on a flat screen bigger than 24" and tell me you don't hate it #PIXELS GUYS THE FUCKING PIXELS #the question becomes: am i linging for my childhood and the nostalgia these things bring OR are they just really comforting and me want #idk this is what my quarter life crisis is all about ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

2 notes · View notes

adreamfromnevermore · 2 months

Text

Love the slight AUs where Bruce as Batman has been a member of the league for ages, but he's somehow managed to keep his assortment of children under the radar.

Because it sets up the wildest misunderstandings within the league. He routinely talks about his babies, his children who are all so sweet and kind and occasionally assholes yes but only because they are young (and traumatized) hell I don't think the league would even be aware that they're adopted. So they're all thinking literal children

Barry: Bats really loves his kids.

Hal: I mean they're babies, wait till they hit the angsty teens and I'm sure we'll be hearing the opposite

Which means the day they finally meet Nightwing they don't know wtf to think. For one thing, how old would he have been when he had this kid???? Should they be worried about that???? And for the other, that is not a baby, that is not a precious little thing.

He could break someone in half. Like a twig.

He won't, but he could. And they can see that. (He's bat trained, they have seen what the bat can do they are not fools)

And they're like, okay. Okay maybe he isn't the baby (he is). He's got younger kids right? He's never said how many, they have 0 clues. They've been expecting 1 child, maybe 2 because he'd said kid in the plural exactly once when comforting an older woman while they were searching for her children in the aftermath of a rough battle.

And then a week later they run into Red Hood. In his leather, with his guns. And he drapes himself across Batmans back with all the self confidence in the world and starts whining about the "Brat" breaking into his safe house.

To steal his dog.

And yet again. He is not baby. He is bigger than Batman. He could probably break Batman in half given the bat didn't put up a fight. But Batman looks at him with probably the softest expression they've ever seen on that mans face and tells him very earnestly that the kid just wants to spend time with his older brother, next time they should try a walk. Maybe go to the zoo.

But probably not one of the babies. They're kind, and gentle, and at least one just loves reading and Bats has been trying to encourage that!!!

And then a day later he mentions his "babies" going for a walk in the park and they all instantaneously lose their minds at the confirmation.

#batman #dc #bruce wayne #batfamily #batfam headcanons #batfam #dick grayson #nightwing #jason todd #red hood #robin #spoiler #red robin #justice league

14K notes · View notes

radiodont · 1 year

Text

alright. let's get on the same page. pride is a protest again this year. if you can safely make it to a parade, you go. you carry signs, you bring a bullhorn, you hand out resources that people can access. cis allies, put your money where your mouth is and show up. rights are being rolled back, states are becoming hostile. you go to a protest, and you be civil to everyone there even if you're an exclusionist or what fucking ever you've decided means that you can be nasty to other marginalized people. you go, you be polite and swallow whatever infighting you have to and you make a scene.

#radio broadcast #trans rights #queer rights #lgbtq rights #we need warm bodies protesting and holding the line #go post about how much you hate people queerer than you on your blog after. whatever. i literally could care less #because ive got bigger things to worry about than whether brad the medicalist thinks im valid.#because there won't be a fucking difference if being trans is outlawed outright. all of us go down.

1 note · View note

twistedwonderlandimaginesblog · 6 months

Note

Mc accidently got splashed with a (obsessive) "love potion" and she falls in giddy love with first person she lays her eyes on.

All she wants to do is give them kisses and hugs...and yea she also is clingy and she follows them around even duuring class. She is ready to do anything for her "love" ( like whatever they ask of her) she wants them to be happy . She is convinced that they are dating and it's honestly pointless to try and explain things to her.

How would Azul, Jamil, Malleus, Duece and Floyd hanndle the situation/what's their reaction? ( they were not dating before )

Azul Ashengrotto:

Azul was doomed by yet another situation he couldn’t see himself out of. He hardly knows how to handle you normally, or rather how to handle his feelings for you, but you’re much harder when you’re like this. Having you clinging to his side and demanding his attention made it impossible for him to concentrate, and feelings be damned he wasn’t going to let his business suffer. Since Jade and Floyd refused to escort you from his office (finding Azul’s flustered face and inability to actually push you away the best comedy bit they’d seen in years) he ordered them to instead find a cure for the nightmarish love potion that ailed you. They do agree but take longer than they need to, wanting Azul to endure his torturous thoughts a bit longer.

Deuce Spade:

You have poor Deuce stressed OUT. He’s too worried about your well-being to hear any of Ace’s teasing, also focused on keeping his lips covered in case of another surprise attack. He wouldn’t mind under normal circumstances but this doesn’t feel genuine (and he had a much more romantic first kiss in mind for the two of you). He boldly confided in his seniors about you in hopes of them helping with a solution, tightly holding your hand to keep you at bay. He’s willing to go to any length to cure you, even if he’d miss the closeness.

Floyd Leech:

Floyd is willing to milk this situation for all that it’s worth. He particularly enjoyed the squeezing contest you had, and how tightly you clung to him even after he clearly won. He would have loved to keep you all to himself, using your condition to get out of working at Mostro Lounge as it would be hard to cook with you attached to him like you were. Jade is surprised with how long Floyd indulged your clingy behavior, even when he seemed fed up, he knew if he really wanted to push you away and lock you up so you’d leave him alone, he would do it.

Jamil Viper:

Jamil would have used you for all you were worth if he didn’t have feelings for you. He’s frustrated that yet another responsibility was thrust upon him, but turning his back on you was not a choice under these circumstances. It makes it hard to go about his day when he has two different people bothering him all day, but you proved to be the bigger challenge (for now). If he could concentrate he’d have an easier time of finding a solution but there was a part of him that longed for you to continue to worship him, curious how much of this might mirror your relationship if you ended up dating.

Malleus Draconia:

You had always been more honest with Malleus than others, but this was certainly new. As much as he enjoyed your emboldened behavior it didn’t take him long to detect something was off, leaving him conflicted. He wouldn’t mind having a close relationship like this with you, maybe some more boundaries discussed for the sake of Sebek’s heart and everyone else's eardrums, but he was disappointed to know this wasn’t you acting on ‘real’ feelings. He’s even more suspicious about how and why you were splashed with such a potion to begin with, growing rather possessive at the concept of someone trying to steal your heart away from him.

#Twisted Wonderland #TWST #Twisted Wonderland Imagines #Twisted Wonderland x Reader #TWST Imagines #TWST x Reader #Azul Ashengrotto #Deuce Spade #Floyd Leech #Jamil Viper #Malleus Draconia #azul ashengrotto x reader #deuce spade x reader #floyd leech x reader #jamil viper x reader #malleus draconia x reader

3K notes · View notes

sexlapis · 6 months

Text

[◉°] … TOJI FUSHIGURO TAKES A LIE DETECTOR TEST… 9.6M VIEWS

꩜ actor!toji (& implied actor toji x actress/actor reader)

⤷ synopsis: toji thought this lie detector test was going to be a breeze. he was a little mistaken.

sfw, fluff, crack, ooc toji, toji & reader are secretly together, toji lying!

masterlists

actor!toji masterlist

⪩　　 ₊　 🍪 　　✧ 　　⁺

“i ain’t nervous,” toji claims, cracking his neck and smirking as the crew members attach the needed equipment to his body, “i ain’t no liar either. so i got nothing to worry about here.”

“i sure hope that’s true, mr.fushiguro.” the polygraph examiner replies slyly.

“are you ready, toji fushiguro?” the interviewer asks.

“yeah, i am,” toji claps, “hurry up and get started.”

“is your name toji fushiguro?”

“yes my name is toji fushiguro.” he looks to the polygraph examiner. “it is, right?”

the woman simply stares at him.

“..alright then…”

the interviews asks another question. “are you about to take a polygraph exam?”

“yes, yes and yes, now give me the real questions!”

TOJI FUSHIGURO TELLS THE TRUTH

YOUR CAREER

“we’re going to start with the category of your career.”

toji nods and looks to the examiner. “how ‘m i doing?”

“you’re very calm, nothing unusual yet.”

“hm.”

the interview begins to speak. “one of your most popular roles as an actor was when you played Frank Castle in the Netflix series, “The Punisher”. some would say this is when you became a heartthrob. do you think is this true?”

toji sighs and shakes his head. “nah-”

“LIE.” the polygraph examiner calls out.

toji raises his hand. “…because, i was already a heartthrob before alla that.” he smiles, looking proud of himself. his answer is met with silence.

“ok.” says the interviewer and goes onto the next question. “do you face a lot of pressure being a heartthrob?”

“nope.” toji answers easily. “i’m just that kinda guy. i ain’t gotta try too hard for much, especially not ‘being hot’.”

he looks at the examiner.

“he’s telling the truth.” she states. she almost seems disappointed by the fact.

“see?” toji says, folding his arms, “as i said, ‘got nothin’ to lie about.”

“in the punisher,” the interviewer starts, ignoring toji’s cocky replies, “do you wear a muscle suit to look bigger than you actually are?”

toji throws his back, cackles echoing around the small room. “fuck no!” he gestures to…his whole body, “‘it look like i need a muscle suit? ‘didn’t even know that shit was a thing… i’m big enough without any of that stuff.” he shrugs, looking into the camera. “i think we can all see that.”

the examiner nods curtly. “..he is telling the truth.”

“do you workout often?” asks the interviewer.

toji scoffs. “i thought i’d get good questions..but yeah, yeah i do workout.”

“would you consider yourself fit?”

“yep. ‘hundred percent.”

“would you consider yourself fitter than,” the interviewer slides a photo of the actor gojo satoru towards toji, “this man?”

“pfft-” toji chortles. “oh, ohh yeah. easily. he’s like..” he looks for the correct words, “a little boy. are we kidding?”

he looks to the examiner and then to the interviewer.

“he is being truthful..again.”

toji smirks at the camera, tapping the side of his nose with his finger. “toji never lies.”

POP CULTURE

“this year, you were named “The Most Sexiest Man Alive” by People Magazine. do you believe you’re sexier than this man, 2022’s sexiest man, nanami kento?” the interviewer slides another photo, this time of the actor nanami kento.

toji looks at the photo for a second, before scoffing a little. “oh yeah. definitely. ‘guy just has a permanent frown on his face. he ain’t ugly but he could smile a little, y’know?”

“what about this ‘guy’, 2021’s most sexiest man alive, ryomen sukuna?” the interviewer also slides a picture of him to toji.

toji strokes his chin. “heh..yeah..yeah i would say so..this guy..he ain’t ugly either but..theres this energy about him..”

“what energy would that be, toji fushiguro?”

“the energy of a fuckin’ mass murderer that’s what!” he laughs at his own joke, looking at the picture of this ‘ryomen sukuna’, who is glaring into his soul through the image. “yeahh, i’d say i’m more attractive than him. just.. just a little.” he holds two fingers close together emphasis. “jesus christ, that’s one scary looking fuck.”

the examiner inspects the polygraph and looks towards toji and the interviewer. “he has been telling the truth.”

“yeah.” toji nods, exhaling through his mouth and sliding the pictures away from himself. “‘course i am.”

LOVE LIFE

toji had been doing well so far, but the category of ‘love life’ would be his downfall.

“do you want to get married in the future?”

“yeah, yeah i do.”

the examiner nods.

“have you ever been in love?”

“..yes.” toji responds, thinking about his past for a second.

the examiner nods again.

“are you in love right now?”

toji pauses for the first time in the whole test. he takes a deep breath. “no. yeah, no. ‘m not.”

the examiner raises an eyebrow at the results. “questionable.”

“oh, c’mon.” toji groans, rolling his eyes.

“is there someone you’re in love with?”

“nope. nobody at all.” he interlinks his fingers, tapping them against each other. “..nobody at all..”

“questionable. again.” the examiner states, pointedly looking at toji.

toji sighs. “oh, brother…”

“did you happen to meet this person..on set?”

“no, ‘cause there is no person?” toji says firmly.

“again.” the examiner says. “questionable.”

“christ…”

the interviewer asks another question. “do you believe in love at first sight?”

toji huffs. “no, that’s just two people who wanna fuck.”

“i see. then,” the interviewer takes out three pictures, all of them being people who he has worked with on set, including you.

“are you in love with any of these people?”

toji gulps, hesitating for a split second, his eyes focused on your picture. “nope. not oneeee bit.”

“LIE.” the examiner shouts excitedly, happy to have finally caught toji out on lying. she rings the negative buzzer repeatedly. “lie!”

“‘you serious?” he asks incredulously, looking between the interviewer and the examiner. “listen, maybe it was just my heart murmur or somethin’ like that,” he looks to side, cheeks rosy and shifts in his seat a little, “i-i don’t-”

“those are the last of our questions.” the interviewer says to toji, smiling knowingly. “thank you for taking part in our lie detector test.”

toji grumbles.

��ৎ

a/n: this was longer than i planned 🤥

#I’m so sorry i always forget the taglist i’m not used to one i’m so sorry😭#actor!toji #toji x reader #toji x gn!reader #toji x you #toji x y/n #toji x self insert #toji fluff #toji fushiguro x reader #toji fushiguro x you #toji fushiguro x y/n #toji fushiguro fluff #fushiguro toji x reader #fushiguro toji x you #fushiguro toji fluff #toji x gender neutral reader #toji x gender neutral!reader

4K notes · View notes

yxami · 12 days

Text

A clingy yandere wolf boy!

desc: yandere wolf hybrid x gender neutral reader, clingy yandere, yandere wolf boy, pretty much fluff, for now!!

The forest surrounding your house not only comforts you but makes you feel safer since there was no one around you for miles without end. Even if there was someone that dared to encroach on your property, you had axes and more than a few metallic weapons to keep you safe.

Usually, you just used your axe to scare off big creatures.

There’s been one big creature that has been on your mind for awhile. You’ve placed your guesses that this thing has been either threatening you or trying to offer some sort of gift?

Mangled hares and deer heads weren’t exactly your vision of a good dinner though.

Before you can further worry about what it means, you usually chuck the pieces to a pack of coyotes that you know venture on your homestead without a care in the world, no matter how many times you chase them off.

You leave your house to collect some plants for tonight’s dinner, almost running over the bloody mess on your porch again, a new pile of creatures have appeared. You let out a long sigh, hating the fact that this happened during times you need to do something else.

You go back inside the house to grab a trash bag.

An unfamiliar creature hides behind a nearby tree with its tail wagging anxiously. He’s worried you’re going to throw this gift away too, was there something wrong with the way he got the prey? He hardly bit into them incase you were annoyed with bite marks making your food look unappetizing.

His ears stay pinned to his head, hoping you’d appreciate this gift.

“Oh! they have a bag, maybe they’re going to bring it back into their house to cook tonight” His tail sways in curiosity, maybe you had finally accepted it! He was finally worthy of being your mate!

He almost steps out to present himself now that you’ve accepted his gift but you make him stop in his tracks when you don’t go inside your house.

You look up, using your hand as a shade for your eyes as you do, seeing some vultures circling nearby you decide you’d give them this since they’d definitely appreciate it more than you do.

“Wait-! Please don’t throw away my gift again” Ayaan appears, a wolf boy that could be mistaken as someone’s house dog judging by how meek he looked at first.

“Is something wrong with it? I’ve been too scared to approach you but now I don’t get it, are my gifts not big enough? Do you want me to hunt a larger animal?” He rambles, looking twice as larger now that he’s no longer hiding behind a tree.

He’s taller, possibly intimidating if he tried to be.

“Gifts? I don’t underst—.. ohh! This is yours? Are you the person leaving these animals on my porch?” You piece it together almost immediately.

“Sorry…” He looks down at the ground, immediately flustered at your words, he must’ve done something wrong. You didn’t even realize that he was asking to be your mate. How embarrassing…

You look confused as he seems to apologize and keep his head down, practically mimicking a sad puppy with his tail between his thighs.

“I’m just confused, why were you leaving these animals at my door? I’m not mad at you” You tap on his shoulder, directing him to look up and understand that you weren’t angered by his actions, just intrigued in what the purpose of it was.

You can’t help but admit to yourself that it was irritating to clean up.

“I was asking to be your mate, with the food, I thought you’d be impressed.. but- but! I can get bigger prey, just give me another chance I’ll get you a bear! A giant one too” His demeanor flips around, his blue eyes catching more light, making them more bright and determined looking.

“I’m alright, I don’t need anymore more dead animals at my door step. And mate? I’m not a wolf hybrid, have you seen me?” You laugh, wondering if the heat in this forest was deluding himself into thinking that you were. You continue walking with the bloody bag, now dripping from an undetected hole.

“I-i know! That’s okay, I don’t care” He says with confidence, almost pressed at your side and he loyally follows you. “Would you prefer if I was human? I don’t think I can get rid of my ears or tail but.. I could probably hide them somehow” He mumbles, thinking about solutions.

“No, I just don’t understand why you’re interested in me of all people, aren’t you guys supposed to date only wolf hybrids and indiscreetly judge humans despite living amongst them?”

You can’t help but ponder about where he has his home set up, you really could’ve sworn that there was no one around for miles, it was a half hour drive into town, you knew some packs had their own little villages established in the forest but you’ve surveyed the entire thing and found none.

“I dunno much about the wolf culture or whatever, I never really paid attention” His tail sways in curiosity at the scars you had on your back, he wanted to graze his fingers against them, wondering what animal dared to face you.

“Huh, alright, well I guess you can stick around, just pull your weight” You grunt as you lug around the heavy bag of fuzzy corpses, it might’ve been some foxes this time but they were too mutilated for you to tell. You come up right to the area where the vultures circles, dropping the bag for them to rip at.

You had forgotten to grab a knife so they’ll just have to rip at the plastic.

“How long can I stick around?” Ayaan makes sure you hadn’t forgotten about his presence, he holds onto your shirt, you don’t really understand what form of dominance it’s supposed to establish but you just let it happen. It wasn’t anything concerning so far.

“However long you want, just help me with chores and you won’t be a bother” You bluntly speak, with a careless tone that would seem hurtful to others but this lovesick puppy takes it as a deal that would last for an unlimited amount of time.

For rest of the day, he cheerily helps out with anything you do, chopping wood? He’s got his own station right next to you, hammering at the logs until you say it’s enough. Collecting food for dinner? He’s killing every bird, insect, and living thing in his sight. He’s doing anything to prove himself as a good partner.

You let out a long sigh once you land in your comfortable bed, as soon as you feel the end of the bed sink under heavy weight you immediately speak. “You can stick around me during the day but you’re not sleeping in the same bed as me”

You hear a throaty whine come out, all you could really see were his shaky blue eyes as he pawed at the sheets, testing his luck. “Please? I’ll be cold, and packs usually always stay cuddled together” He lies, trying to put on the best pouty face he could muster, he wasn’t ever a beggar until he met you.

You shake your head, pointing at the door, to which he sulks and practically has to drag himself out the door.

Your demand was ignored once you went to sleep anyways, Ayaan snuck under the sheets and cuddled right up to you, holding you like a childhood stuffed animal, so protectively as if someone might steal you away. His tail was wagging so fast it made a thumping sound under the sheets throughout the night.

Now you were definitely stuck with him.

1K notes · View notes

verstarppen · 8 months

Text

summary; mercedes is a just a tiny bit worried about your dates with their archenemesis

pairing; max verstappen x fem! mercedes admin! reader [ no faceclaim ]

a/n; due to popular demand here's the part 2; i see your comments: you asked and i deliver 🫶 [ series masterlist ]

liked by lewishamilton, georgerussell63, carmenmmundt and 299,546 others

mercedesamgf1 have some tits to distract you from that crash

view all 12,291 comments

gerogerussell63 Does your boyfriend know you're posting this

mercedesamgf1 his tits are bigger why would he care

staraikkonen THE ADMIN IS KILLING ME

ceruleanwilliams it worked

g3org3zilla THANK YOU ADMIN FOR THE BLESSING 🙏

honeyvettel FOR FREE????

liked by schecoperez, maxverstappen1, christianhorner and 166,267 others

redbullracing Hot weather 🤝 Ice Baths, sorry for the wait. 😉

view all 56,342 comments

mercedesamgf1 booo post the vertiddies

goatlonso GIRL THIS AIN'T YOUR PRIV ACCOUNT strawberryrosberg TEARS

ynusername sorry correct account this time boooo post the vertiddies

schecoperez No comment lewishamilton Really? Seems like you always have an opinion ynusername can we go back to the more pressing issue lewishamilton Don't you already stare at his chest enough maxverstappen1 She does? ynusername ACCUSATIONS

liked by mickschumacher, maxverstappen1, danielricciardo and 295,199 others

ynusername us during wig gate btw

view all 86,280 comments

lewishamilton Blocked and reported

ynusername YOU'RE JUST MAD YOU GOT BAMBOOZLED

danielricciardo Things I ate and survived: That

ynusername i am in awe of your slaynergy (slay energy) mickschumacher 🙏🙏🙏

georgerussell63 Y'all hear something

ynusername stay mad georgerussell63 Praying for your downfall.

applenorizz HOW IS THIS WHOLE SITUATION REAL I-

lionkingseb wig gate is more entertaining than anything during silly season

liked by maxverstappen1, ynusername, pierregasly and 740,191 others

charles_leclerc This is my official audition for the next wig gate model. I'm ready 👠

view all 200,024 comments

ynusername are you sure this isn't an audition to date my boyfriend

charles_leclerc Never insult me like this ever again

arthur_leclerc jumpscare

maxverstappen1 I'll be frank, I dropped my phone.

charles_leclerc Hi, Frank ynusername wow i wish you dropped your phone when you look at me 💔💔😩 maxverstappen1 I would drop everything for you ynusername oh 🤭 charles_leclerc Get out of my comments and get a room.