#the slutty slutty years meme will never get old for me

[tjalexandernyc]

Not sure why so many people are getting nostalgic over Claire's at the moment but if you'd like to hear my personal Claire's ear piercing story here it is.

I'm 40 years old so I grew up in peak '90s mall culture. Claire's was a standard stop on any mall visit along with The Rave, Auntie Anne's, and the sketchy arcade. Despite the ubiquity of Claire's and its cheap ear piercing, I never got my ears pierced until I was... probably 15 or maybe 14. I don't know how I escaped it for so long; most of my girl friends had their ears pierced either as an infant or at least before they were tweens. I suspect it was a combination of me being a little nonbinary baby who didn't want to wear earrings in both ears but couldn't articulate why, so I never asked for them; the fact that my mom was thrifty and never offered; and my grandmother's penchant for clip-on earrings, since she'd also never gotten her ears pierced. I think when she was growing up in the 1920s it was seen as slutty? Anyway IF I was required to wear earrings for a fancy occasion there were plenty of grandma's sitting around the place.

But when I was 14 or 15, I was at the mall with my father. I don't remember why we were at the mall together. We rarely did anything together, and even now are not especially close. I vaguely remember my childhood best friend being there too. We must have been waiting for someone or something (maybe a movie at the attached theater?) and had some time to kill.

I think my dad must have offered to buy us some earrings we were examining at one of the kiosks, because I remember having to explain to him that I didn't have pierced ears. My dad famously misremembered things about me, like thinking I'd had braces when it was my older brother, not me, who needed them. He was shocked. He must have assumed I'd gotten them pierced at some point, but I told him no, it never happened. He offered to pay for the piercing at Claire's right then and there.

I don't know if I can explain how it felt, that offer. I was largely ambivalent about piercings. I knew, as most '90s kids did, that there was a Gay Ear that some guys wore earrings in, but no one seemed to agree which one it was. I have a visceral memory, down to knowing exactly which seat I was in, when a kid in the elementary school lunchroom got a cheap clip on pirate earring stuck on his earlobe and was mercilessly taunted for it being on the Gay Ear. I both wanted piercings so I could figure out which of my ears, if any, were gay. I simultaneously didn't want anyone putting holes in me. I craved visibility and invisibility in equal measure. I wanted to do something with my dad, since we never did things together. I didn't want to spend my own money on ear piercing, which my father spoke of like some inevitable event. I wanted to talk to my best friend about all this alone even though I knew she would not understand.

I ended up getting my ears pierced at Claire's that day. The 18 year old cashier who was manning the piercing gun made one puncture slightly off center compared to the other. I picked out a pair of cubic zirconia studs, which I thought weren't as girly as the others. After the piercings healed I started wearing earrings pretty much every day and amassed a huge collection of them. I did that up until I came out a few years ago.

I don't wear earrings often anymore but when I do it's usually just one dangly transguy-esque piece or a single hoop. I put it in the same ear that the kid in the lunchroom did. I haven't thought about my father in relation to my piercings for a very long time, until recently, when the Claire's memes reminded me. I think there's probably a lot of pop psychology mud to dig through there if someone cared to. I don't.

My father and I talk a couple times a year now, usually brokered by my mom. He has pierced ears, by the way, three in each ear. I don't remember when that happened. I'd like to think it was around the time my parents got divorced. I'd like to think it was circa 1997. I'd like to think it happened the way I know it didn't, in a way that even our combined shit memories couldn't conjure: that we both got gunned at the Claire's at the mall, ears red and puffy, before getting a cinnamon sugar pretzel to split. It didn't happen that way, but god I wish it had.

[tastycitrus]

Barbara: Steph and Cass have been queerbaiting for nearly twenty slutty, slutty years... Steph and Cass, hearing this over comms: Steph: Oracle, what is that supposed to mean? Cass: What are you talking about? Steph: What the HELL is that supposed to mean??

#batgirl #batgirls #barbara gordon #stephanie brown #cassandra cain #stephcass #yeah i dunno #the slutty slutty years meme will never get old for me #can we still consider the years they were retconned from continuity as years they've been queerbaiting? #me: i mean retroactively speaking convergence batgirl revealed that they'd been living together since new 52 destroyed the continuity #so if we view it from an in-universe perspective pre-flashpoint stephcass never stopped queerbaiting

[selfproclaimedunicorn]

⭐ for the director’s cut meme!

Going off of something vague 🤔. I can work with this, though! Enjoy me lore dumping my Extra Tyrells 💚💛

Ella’s eyes trailed down from his face, to his emerald green doublet, and the golden rose and ring of thorns of the line descended from one of Lord Bertrand’s bastard sons in the center of it.

- Rhaella 6: Be Not A Bed Of Roses

SO, the bastard line. When I got convinced to have her marry a Tyrell I immediately had to scramble to make it make sense within the preexisting lore for that part of asoiaf, where the lord of House Tyrell was a literal one-year-old during The Dance, so I was looking through the wiki & George mentioned Lord Bertrand Tyrell having boocoo bastard sons. My brain latched onto that, because if George is going to make note of that, I will use it. I made a whole family tree to puzzle through it (the notes on it are partially updated for the next chapter, so ages are one year off from introduction)

So what's going on there, is that Lord Bertrand’s son & heir [Gareth] just was not having sons for years, & in misogynistic desperation he petitioned King Jaehaerys to legitimize one of his half-brothers, just to have as a backup. This, naturally, went over well because Jaehaerys hated women's rights. Lord Gareth wound up having a son, so his half brother never inherited anything, but he did get to have a household & form a cadet branch of House Tyrell.

So this cadet branch resides at "Thorn Hall," & has "The Knight of Thorns" as a sort of hereditary title. And they're only on generation 3, so the fact they exist as "backup inheritors" is still pretty fresh in the minds of the main Tyrells. Like, if somebody is struggling to have heirs, a Knight Of Thorns could probably start pushing for a claim to High Garden if he was well liked enough. It's all very delicious & needlessly complex drama I did not need to add. So, y'know, my favorite thing to do (I mean, you've heard about my main asoiaf au).

Plus, it let me introduce a betrothed for Ella that's still smarter politically than her initial arc's trajectory. And he's Canon Sexy. With nothing but his slutty little waist, his sexual experience, & a bit of forethought, he can achieve his dream of being a trophy husband!

#asks #fic: sins of the father #sotf commentary #the tyrells aren't my favorite great house but i got convinced to go that route #& it makes sense in context with stuff going on with Ella's aunt

[patriciavetinari]

I saw a post recently making a joke about how straight men will think women want to date them because those women have been kind to them and I know my experience is anecdotal at best, but those stories are always extremely baffling to me because none of this has ever worked out for me when I tried to use those dynamics when I was actively trying to attract men for dating. And idk of it was all because I was fat or weird or what, but as a teen and young adult it made me doubt feminism because patriarchy was clearly ignoring me, not being predatory toward or objectifying me the way I wanted it to for validation.

I see jokes about one kind act or even one kind word provoking courtship from 'the dudes', there was that non-interested woman being almost cornered in a bar somewhere by a guy wanting her number, I see the memed comic strip, the one that's 'aww, you're so sweet' and 'hello, Human resources?!' with a woman being complimented at work, and with my rational thinking I understand that this is a real issue and this is patriarchy and when it's unwanted it's horrible to be on the receiving end of that.

But a blink in my brain since I was about 10 years old hadn't stopped asking 'how can I make this happen to me?' and then it hadn't! Not once! I was kind to boys when they started letting me anywhere near them, I knew some of their interests (viddy games and such), I was helpful to the point of becoming a doormat etc, abd it hadn't worked.

I was planning as a teen to make dating a huge part of my life and my personality, I was expecting to jump at the opportunity to lose my virginity at about 15 or something because that's what popular media at the time implied would be almost normal but a bit soon. Then I realized my fatness is actually going to be a hinder, so I lost weight to the point of anorexia and expected, so to speak, to do a speedrun through a double digit of boyfriends in the ages of 17-22, then land safely in a rich marriage by the age of 25 with the glory of a retired courtesan.

Then, as I was still not getting any attention, even wearing fishnets and miniskirts and heels and hanging out in seedy bars until wee hours, I started running out of ideas of what I was doing wrong and why wasn't the famed universal womens' experiece of being objectified happening to me.

Was I wrong or was feminism wrong? I went into research and went through all of the available dating advice on the interned back in the day. I've tried every technique and trick and secret and behavior and even pheromone perfume. I've tried kindness, sluttiness, attentiveness, homemaking vibes and bringing homemade baked goods to the guy I fancied at work. For the latter the result was that he told me he shared those cupcakes with the girl he actually wanted to fuck.

I tried dating apps and got barely any swipes, I tried seedy bars again and only got catcalled by men so drunk they threw up mid-catcall, I tried going to nightclubs with some weird girls I met somewhere and watched them veing whisked away to secondary location or just to club bathrooms for a quick fuck, and now I've approached 30 years of age with all that (lack?) of experience and not once having had as much as anyone ask for my phone number. I have been so lucky to never have gone through any of those traumatic and offensive experiences.

I also feel completely invisible and unwanted but all I'm told is that I'm so lucky to have avoided any attention and at the same time that I don't try hard enough.

Which is a fascinating mindsent to have I think.

#life #dating

[rubsjuice]

hi! who and what is the guy that made you forget greek mythology exists!

Hi, thank you for asking

(first image by @gh0stbreath second I drew over a meme)

his name is

Icarus

Also I tend to write characters more on the natural/realistic side so I hope you're not disappointed he's not a wretched fantastical beast or a dude with super cool powers he's just a guy. He could be your neighbor for all we're concerned. Read more bc I can't shut up about him

He just. Looks very normal. He's a tiny gay loser car salesman from Boston with a husband and children, negative credit score, 30k in debt and in the sights of loan sharks because he's too stubborn to get through his head that his dream of being self made and successful is never gonna be realized. He also has a penchant for religion, although he stops going to church to get more time to try to make his business work. His dream is to have a successful job, a beautiful family, and being a pillar of community – he's the guy the American Dream is marketing itself to, and the kind of guy who's most let down by it

He gets tied up in some mafia business when they put him as a front for their own business in exchange of letting his debts go and leaving his family out of it, and he promptly uses it to abandon the aforementioned family, get filthy stinking rich, invest heavily in advertising and become one of the most well-known faces in New England & the East Coast in general because his face would be in almost every ad running on TV at the time. He also had a huge liking of fashion and apparel in general so he had a bunch of clothing lines, perfumes and accessories named after him. He also developed like 5 different mental illnesses from it because by the time he was famous he was also in his 40s and he experienced the most hardcore midlife crisis ever trying to keep up with the socialites and rich kids he'd surround himself with.

Then when the mafia drops him and it turns out most of his fortune was inflated by an overcomplicated money laundering scheme he sort of starts to experience the Horrors as he starts getting increasingly desperate to keep his life afloat due to all the mental illness he's accumulated, and after a particularly bad trip on LSD where he sees every version of himself from the past and future and beats the shit out of himself he decides he needs to shape up and let this life go for his own sake. So he calls his (now ex)husband and asks to go back into his life and he goes through this whole 20 year long healing arc with a lot of therapy and finds a new and exciting gender for himself (guy who is a mom)

Some other random facts about him is that he's catty, physically fragile, lowkey slutty and loves to overindulge himself. He can be very blunt and says the most insane things. As an old man (around 60) he has a tumblr blog where he ends up being like a B-celebrity. He enjoys serious and artsy media and his favorite book/movie of all time is American Psycho. He relates to Patrick Bateman because he believes him to be the sort of guy he could turn into if he let himself stay in the rich life for longer without seeking proper help, and being able to look at that guy and go "lol glad that's not me anymore" makes him feel Normal

As you can tell if you squint, his life story more or less mirrors the tale of Icarus, with the exception of the healing arc bit (he was saved from falling in the ocean!!), plus with his whole religious theme he also gets a "fallen angel" sort of motif that fits very well. There's more stuff to his life that makes his name and theming more interesting but I don't wanna keep you here all day

Here's his playlist organized chronologically also it's full of bangers

So yeah with all these themes you can tell every time someone talks about the myth of Icarus I just go "ooooo just like my blorbo" and forget that I made him close to the myth on purpose

You can also find posts I tag as him [here]

#gigglingauspice #mafa answers #mafa talks a lot #mafa writes #icarusposting #AAAAAA MY BLORBO #one time i made him on sims 2 and his first job was a yoga teacher #and he injured his leg but was very brave about it but then it got Worse and he got fired #that was his first day at the job by the way #he fell down like a wounded gazelle #then he went home and made homemade soup and cried

[boethiahsboytoy]

All the general, background, and Skyrim questions for Vulon >:)

(Or fewer if you'd rather asksjfnfn I know that's a lot)

Holy fuck lmao this is so funny bc I was LITERALLY trying so hard to just Pick A Few questions for your OCs instead of asking if you'd answer all the questions omfg. But if u decide 2 answer them all pls @ me I wanna SEE hehheehe >:3

(I'm loke a Little goofy from I'm Sleepy so like. Some of my answers reflect that sorry. Also this is SOOO long because I CAN Not shut up 🧡

TES Ask Meme here!

General:

1) Name: Vulonshulzaan, written out as Vulon Shulzaan. Serana calls it V.

2) Associated game/era: skywim BABEY

3) Age at beginning of game/relevant time period: Not quite sure how Altmer aging works but it's the equivalent of 26 when it gets into Skyrim bc that's how old I am :)

4) Race: Aw fuck I spoiled it XD Altmer! Hehe.

5) Sex/gender (bonus points if there's a cool answer): It's like if a guy was made out of explosions and hardstyle music but like a really slutty version. Boy toy. Male????? <- All ways it's described itself minus the hardstyle bit bc that isn't in Skyrim canon. But it should be. Listen 2 "Dragonborn" by Headhunterz (@ anyone reading this).

6) Sexual orientation/preferences: Gay. Into people that r BIG and MEAN and SCARY. Th fact that Lord Boethiah checks all those boxes is not an insignificant part of why it worships Them (I am only half joking).

7) Class (or a general description of their skillset): Battle mage, leans more on the mage side for the most part tho. Really Good At Sword though like it's a terrifyingly proficient swordsman just as it is a mage!

The rest of the answers will be under the cut!

BACKGROND!!

1) Is this character from their race's home province/territory? If not, what is their relationship with the region? Do they feel a connection to it?

It's from the Summerset Isles! But it had nothing but bad experiences there for the most part and feels very Weird about it or maybe grew up somewhere else i havent decided. It knows, logically, that its culture is from there. That it IS an Altmer. But it feels so, so disconnected from it all bc of its childhood and trauma and feels like it can't connect with it. It's quite sad about it and never really feels like it fits in anywhere while it's alive :(

2) Where did they grow up? A city? A village? Isolated, in the wilderness? What was it like to leave?

Man. Idk where specifically bc I don't go Too much into that with any of my OCs, but it grows up somewhere in the heart of Thalmor Bull Shit probably.

3) What was their childhood like? Who raised them? Do they have siblings?

UM. Bad. It's parents were very abusive and mean and kept it isolated from its peers. It only started learning about the world outside its bubble when it was around (altmer equivalent of) 12 or so, when it started sneaking out at night and doing who-knows-what. It didn't have any siblings either. :(

4) If they are an adventurer, why did they choose that life? Did they choose it at all?

It wouldn't call itself an adventurer but like you COULD technically refer to it as such. It wouldn't mind being called one tbh hehe. But yes, I suppose??

5) Do they worship any gods? Who? How do they feel about the gods in general?

YELLS EXCITEDLY BC I CAN TALK ABOUT THIS. SO!!! Vulon in its older teenage years began seeking out Knowledge from Hermaeus Mora, wanting to learn ways it could escape its parents thru magic and also cause som havoc. It very nearly became a proper Seeker, and possibly would have if it never got the courage to kill its parents! After that it became a sort of race between Mora and Lord Boethiah to see who could get Vulon first >:3 Mora's influence was already There, but Lord Boethiah saw potential in Vulon for more than just a tool to gather knowledge, and carefully found ways to nudge the world into guiding it to Them!

It has a deep respect and love for its Lord, and even while serving Them as Champion it respects Mora as well, however it never properly Worships Him. As for Gods n such in General it feels like they need to prove themselves to be worthy of respect to have it.

6) What are their interpersonal relationships like? Are they close with many people?

It's like, Incredibly Bad at socializing. It doesn't pick up on cues or tone well and isn't good at keeping conversation going. It's very awkward internally and hides that behind being loud and eccentric and sometimes A Little Mean depending on where it is. Most people find it off putting and it likes it that way! BUT there r a few people that stick around with it long enough for it to warm up 2 them and act a bit more chill. Serana is the main one! They're very close and she sees him as a cool older cousin type guy!

7) What's their relationship with their family like? Do they have one?

H. Bad, in terms of its parents. It has Serana tho, and Sissel (and Britte but they aren't As close. It definitely looks out and cares for her tho, that's still its kid), and it fought with the Dawnguard long enough to consider them its family. In death it meets Craig, an Ancient Falmer Champion of Boethiah, that it gets close to and in turn sort of ends up as Boethiah! Vyrthaal's 3rd parent! So it does have a family in the end, one it loves and cares for very deeply.

8) What guilds do they join? Are they committed to those guilds, or are they mostly in them for the benefits?

I dont think it joins any , unless is the Dawnguard a guild???

9) Are they a vampire/lycanthrope? Did they choose to become one? Would they reverse it, given the chance?

It's neither! Obviously not a vampire bc its Lord Boethiah's Champion but even without that FUCK Moldy Balls we hate that motherfucker!!!! And can't b a lycanthrope, again bc it being Lord Boethiah's Champion, and They're not close enough w/Hircine for that 2 be plausible. Vyrthaal tries 2 convince it 2 become one but like it's dead so it can't even if it wanted to/Hircine wanted it to.

SKYRIM SHUFFLE

1) Were they trying to cross the border? Why?

Ya!! To get to the Sacellum of Boethiah! :3

2) Do they follow Hadvar or Ralof? Why

Neither, but it gets into Helgen Keep to get all its shit back. Probably runs into Hadvar, who it probably kills bc its like really freaked THE fuck out.sorry Hadvar fans :( to be fair Vulon feels bad about it bc like, it doesn't know who the fuck that was!! It doesn't like Senseless killing.

3) Do they pick a side in the Civil War?

It does Not lmao

4) How do they feel about Tullius and Ulfric on a personal level?

It sees Tullius as a pawn for the Thalmor and therefore an enemy, but never interacts with him personally (lucky for him). It loathes Ulfric (for also being a pawn for the Thalmor) especially when it sees how cruelly the Dunmer are treated in Windhelm. Now that I'm thinking about it, Vulon might be really popular among the Dunmer in Windhelm--its Champion of Lord Boethiah and would definitely go out of its way to try and help them out. Kicks the shit out of the asshole harassing that random lady when u first enter the city (it doesn't kill him right then and there but it DOES kill him that night) as well as anyone he's friends with. But anyways it Definitely seeks out an audience w Ulfric to yell at him, gets thrown out but not imprisoned bc the guards are too scared to touch it. So he knows what it Is and that it hates him lmao, and probably is like a LITTLE afraid of it if he recognizes its Champion if Lord Boethiah??

5) Do they kill Paarthurnax? Why?

No, because Miraak kills him first. Had it been given the option though, it wouldn't kill him. Paarthurnax didn't do anything to it or the people it cares about, and on top of that he's changed greatly from who he was as Alduin's Bestie and can respect that. Also, Sissel knows about him??????? So like. It would want 2 tell her abt its new mentor lol. But for real Vulon would have respected Paarthrunax for realizing how fucked up he was and trying to make it right.

6) How do they feel about Delphine and the Greybeards?

It never gets a chance to meet Delphine, but it would hate how much she'd try to order it around and butt heads with her CONSTANTLY. But I don't think it would like, hate her???? It just wouldn't LIKE her or get along with her. I feel like in Theory if they ever fought together they'd make a good team tho, tbh. It also dislikes the Greybeards like, a LOT lmao it sees them as unhelpful assholes who Also think they get to boss it around for no fucking reason except it was given a Soul it doesn't want.

7) On a scale of 1-10, how much do they hate the Thalmor? The Empire?

The scale explodes because of how much Vulon hates em

8) What do they do at the war meeting? How does it go? Do they maintain neutrality?

It doesn't go bc it isn't able to happen hehe :') With Miraak being released from apocrypha to do whatever he wants the Civil War is put super on hold. Also High Hrothgar gets destroyed. So. There's That. :(

9) How do they feel about their position as Dragonborn? Do they embrace the role? Does it terrify them? Do they take advantage of it?

Oh it HATES it!! It makes it feel helpless and trapped and overwhelmed, something its felt all its life and finally thought it escaped. But. There's something exhilarating about fighting Dragons, and even more so about absorbing their Souls to feed its hunger for power. But that hunger only grows, and ultimately it scares Vulon. It knows it only has the slightest grasp on its mortality and is afraid of how much these Souls being absorbed by its own weakens it further and further.

10) Who do they marry? How did they meet?

It doesn't marry anybody, but it swears its Soul to Lord Boethiah and thats close enough♡♡♡♡

11) Do they kill Cicero? Do they regret their decision?

Ahhh so when Vulon was being made originally I did have it join the Dark Brotherhood, and it was best friends with Cicero!! They were brothers:) It never would have killed him!

12) Do they return the Skeleton Key? What are the consequences?

It doesn't get it, and honestly the whole Thieves Guild questline probably happens without Vulon even noticing:') It'd be happy for them tho if the Key is returned--if it Had done all of that it would have returned the Key and help make the Guild not suck but ultimately not want to be the Guild Master.

13) Saadia or Kematu?

Another quest it wouldn't go through; but it would likely err on the side of caution and help Saadia out after talking to her I think.

14) Which daedric quests do they do? Which artifacts do they use? What's their favorite?

Only Lord Boethiah's :3 It earns the Ebony Mail as well as Goldbrand, both of which it cherishes and respects very deeply, taking care of and using them all throughout the rest of its life and when in Oblivion.

15) Dawnguard or Volkihar Clan? If they choose the Volkihar, do they ever reverse their vampirism?

Dawnguard BABEYY!!

16) What's their relationship with Serana? How close are they?

Mentioned it earlier but they're very close! They're like cousins or smthn, n they look out for each other. Fun Fact, Vulon doesn't even take Serana to Harkon! It picks up Immediately on what an abusive monster he was, and tells her that she doesn't have to return to him and it'll even help her hide herself away. Obviously Serana doesn't believe it because that's the fucking Champion Of Lord Fucking Boethiah, Molag Bal's fucking RIVAL and also the Daedric Prince of Deciet and Backstabbing!!! But Vulon tells her about its own past, what it was like for it growing up, how terrible its parents are. How, Lord Boethiah's or not, it can't just bring someone to their abuser when it has a chance to get them somewhere safe. And after a night of travel together she asks Vulon to bring her to the Dawnguard instead, and the Quest continues pretty much the same from there, with the addition of more vampire attacks as Harkon knows Serana's Out There.

17) Thoughts on Valerica? Thoughts on Isran?

It isn't fond of Valerica but recognizes that she was a victim of Molag Bal and Harkon's just as much as Serana was. It helps get her out of the Soul Cairn on the condition she renounces Bal and cures herself of vampirism tho! As for Isran, it thinks he's neat :) Like, it actually respects him and its because he's a grumpy no nonsense bastard BUT he's still willing to listen to Vulon when it tells him that the vampire kid it brought in IS going to help them and this WONT fuck them all over. He also probably thinks its funny that Vulon joined the Dawnguard to kill vampires and only remembered that it's Prince and Molag Bal are super enemies like, Long after it fuckin' should have lmaooooo. Like he makes a passing comment about having half a mind to thank Lord Boethiah for sending Their Champion to help them and Vulon is like "huh????? What does my Lord have to do with this--OHHHHHH HOLY FUCK THEY HATE MOLAG BAL OH SHIT. WAIT HANG ON. LEGALLY I HAVE TO ASK THEM IF IM ALLOWED TO BE HERE" and the Entirety of the dawnguard (and Serana) are like "Vulon what the FUCK do you mean you didn't know you were getting in the way of the Princes' bullshit!!!?!????? Hello?????????????" And Serana probably smacks it upside the head Literally as it's trying to summon Lord Boethiah to Speak w/Them. Probably As it's speaking to Them. They probably ask her to smack it again.

18) How do they feel about Miraak? Is he a villain to them, or a tragic figure?

Oh man. SO. Lord Boethiah is the one that tells it about Miraak, and how if it frees him he'll take care of Alduin for it. So it gets into Appcrypha under the guise of wanting to make amends or something and just....yoinks Miraak out. Tells him that now he gets to prove himself once and for all and kill Alduin like he wanted to all those years ago. At the moment it thinks Hey maybe this guy will be alright.

So Miraak does it.

And then decides he wants to conquer all of Tamriel. And now Vulon is the only thing that can stop him.

I think though, that they could have been allies. Miraak wishes to be the master of his own fate, and that's exactly what Vulon is. The two of them are probably very similar, and I'm sure there are times where it wonders if they could have been close.

Thank u for sending all these this was really fun hehehe!!

#ask #squigglebug #Lucy #ask meme response #oc vulon shulzaan #this was SO fun omfg

[volturialice]

Edward and Bella are simply both ace 😌🖤🤍💜

maybe so! you can definitely read them that way.

bella being super uncomfy with all the attention she gets from boys? edward recoiling in disgust from mike's and jessica's totally normal Horny Teen Fantasies™? the way bella has what basically amounts to an anxiety attack on isle esme?

you can choose to read all of that as "stuff a repressed conservative mormon author thought was cool/sexy/Appropriate for her characters," which, yeah. but on the flip side, you can also choose to read the characters as ace.

at the very least, neither of them seems to want sex for the sake of sex—they just want each other. edward has been attracted to one person he's met in a century, so at the very least he reads as demisexual. and bella has been attracted to two people in her entire life, so despite the many memes about what a slutty little horndog she is, she fits that label just as well.

and I can't speak for anyone else, but the whole "I'm deeply in love with you but we can never bang and even making out is a big ask" thing was very appealing to me as an (as-yet-unaware) ace tween. I was just having my first physical/romantic experiences and beginning to realize I might be Different from other people that way, so it was comforting to read about characters in the same boat, albeit for silly supernatural reasons. when everything else in pop culture was telling me all sixteen-year-olds were sexually active balls of raging hormones, it was nice to read about seventeen-year-old bella kind of shrugging and admitting she'd never felt that kind of attraction to anyone before.

#asks #ace stuff

[secondhand-trash]

BNHA but it’s thebonappetittestkitchen

A/N: I watched one Test Kitchen Talks and now I’m obsessed. I’ve been binging BA vids and this is the end result lmao (might write a part 2 later if I can think of other characters to put in there)

Bakugou Katsuki

Gourmet Makes but angrier

very serious about everything

*tch* “The weight of this layer of the cookie is off.”

“...you said 14.9 grams.”

“Yes and this is 0.1 grams off, we have to do this again.”

constant swearing when he is by the stove

the staff might have give him constant new topics just to see him tick off

always bickering with the other chefs

“Hey, kacchan-”

“Do not fucking call me that on camera.”

the fan favorite meme

(Kaminari is bitter about that)

“Taste this.”

“I think-”

“Say anything and I’ll burn this place down.”

“...it is great.”

Midoriya Izuku

the helpful one

always wandering in the background of every single video

works under the editor

is not actually a professional chef but kinda learned enough by being around everyone 

the one that got sent to deliver bad news because he is less likely to be stabbed by a kitchen knife by annoyed chefs

“...they send you here to tell me things that will my job harder, aren’t they.”

“Yeah..”

the one who will drop his own things to help around the kitchen

doesn’t normally cooks, but when he does it is always for very homely recipes

“This is not the most common way but that’s what I grow up eating...”

“My mom taught me how to do this.”

“I found this recipe in my mom’s old cookbook.”

Kirishima Eijirou

the “big friendly dog in human form”

started out as a butcher

gets appointed to do all the heavy work

prime thumbnail material

(he still has no idea why the editors are always telling him to roll his sleeves all the way up or where a tank top whenever they are filming outdoors)

campfire specialist

“Bro, this is sick dude.”

“Eyyyyyyy Bakugou-” *hand in the air*

“(sighs)” *high five*

very popular among older viewers??? 

(grandson material???)

Aizawa Shouta

the “tired guardian”, as always

puts booze in e v e r y t h i n g

“Now add a splash of white wine.” *proceeds to pour out half the bottle*

it’s an inner joke among chefs and fans that he never sleeps 

showed up in a video in a crisp shirt with his hair up like, once, and the internet went into a frenzy

comments like “WHY IS THE HOBO SO HOT” flooded the comments 

compilation videos with titles like “Aizawa being done with everyone’s bullshit for 10 minutes straight”

(it’s basically him sighing and staring with dread in his eyes in someone else’s background throughout the entire video)

gets undermined a lot because of his demeanor, but will casually namedrop his credentials which shocks everyone

“When I was working at (insert famous prestigious restaurant)...”

“Wait hold up a second wHAT????”

Yaoyorozu Momo

the “properly trained in some renounced culinary school and probably comes from some impressive background but we don’t talk about that”

ridiculously accurate tastebuds

often act as the guinea pig for other chefs

recreating (blank) by taste videos

gets oddly specific realy quick

*munch munch* “Is that prosciutto that was made in winter by hand and dried for two years in Italy?”

“I’m sorry what now???”

gets cranky when people misplace things 

never raises her voice, never swears, but somehow intimidating as all hell

when Yaomomo tells you to put the flour on the forth shelf counting from the left, you do it

unintentionally expensive taste

“Wait, you’ve never tried European white truffle (which can sell up to thousands a pound btw) before?”

“No?????”

Kaminari Denki

the “how the hell does he even get in here anyways????”

blog editor, but people like him so much that he keeps showing up

always causing chaos

always butting in when the others are filming 

the prankster

“I hide tiny babies all over the test kitchen”

“I replace all the extra virgin olive oil in the test kitchen with virgin olive oil and see how long it will take for people to notice”

No one has ever seen him cook on camera but he still has a fuck ton of screen time

“Make Kaminari film a cooking video” is now the no. 1 requests among fans

Todoroki Touya Dabi

the “I need this job or else I’ll have to go home and inherit the 1 billion dollar net worth family business”

how the fuck does he make the chef uniform slutty???

(the trick is to unbutton enough until you can see the line of his chest)

does that thing where he looks into the camera while chopping every video

how the fuck does he make basic instructions sound suggestive???

(the trick is to lower his voice enough until it almost sounds gravel but you didn’t hear that from me)

“Can you pass me that salt, doll? Thank you.”

the only one who has his nickname in the credits

“So I learned how to cook this because my dad told me that it wouldn’t work and I want to piss him off.”

sleeves are always rolled up because “these tats are expensive, why not show them off?”

rumors are that he has beef with Shouto from the office, but it’s just a rumour though

Asui Tsuyu

the one who will actually teach you something

gives very clear instructions

back-to-back cooking 

“Why is this not working-”

“Have you tried adding more butter?”

“Oh.”

you can physically see her growing more and more concern by the second whenever she walks by someone messing up

she’s like your mom, somehow she’ll be able to find everything that you couldn’t even though you both look through the same places

her siblings showed up in the kitchen once and everyone was immediately smitten

#bnha headcanons #bnha au #bnha imagines #bnha imagine #bnha crack #bakugou katsuki #midoriya izuku #kaminari denki #yaoyorozu momo #kirishima eijirou #aizawa shouta #dabi #asui tsuyu

[atmilliways]

After five years of sleeping on my childhood mattress (which is over 33 years old and literally the “super firm” model full of springs) we have a brand new mattress set up and I might actually get more than 5 hours of sleep on it tonight. Hurray! Time to celebrate with a meme!!

@walkwithursus tagged me on this a few days ago.  ❤️

Rules: Write the latest line(s) from your WIP and tag as many people as there are words in the (last) line. Make a new post, don’t reblog.  

Pickles came back to them making out furiously against the nearest wall. His victorious smirk turned into a leer and he sidled up with a smack to Nathan’s backside. “Hey, got any’a that fer me?”

Nathan had been his best friend for years, but funnily enough they’d never kissed—must be slowing down in his old age. He could taste Charles on the other man’s lips, which was its own special kind of thrill, knowing that his boyfriend was in a mood to be wantonly slutty, but he dipped past that out of sheer curiosity and didn’t break away until his crappy smoker’s lungs forced him to.

Dear god, I... I don’t think I know 50 people. If you want to do this, consider yourself tagged!

#jean rambles #my fanfic

[hermannsthumb]

OOOH AUTUMN FIC MEMES !!! okay if you aren't terribly busy and wouldn't mind, of course, i'd love to see the prompt "hayride" and/or "flannel shirt" for newmann :3

from autumn fic meme here: 25. Hayride + 28. Flannel Shirt

HELLO ERICA....YES OF COURSE.......have some post-movie newt and hermann as roommates with a side of mutual (not that they realize) pining

————————————————————————

It takes Hermann ten days to agree to the idea when Newton first proposes it, and even then, he’s skeptical; he blames his allergies first (dust, dead leaves, mold), his back (extra-sensitive to being jostled about), his schedule (too busy, Newton, really, perhaps next year), before Newton—evidently quite desperate—finally decides to just bribe him into it. “It’s literally thirty minutes,” he begs, “it’s fun, and I’ll do the dishes for a whole month afterwards. A whole month! For thirty minutes of fun bonding with me.”

This is no small compromise: in all of their time sharing close quarters, from the professional nature of their laboratory to the more—well, er—intimate friendship of their two-bedroom-flat, Newton has never once put a single plate in the dishwasher, never once wiped down a single coffee mug, never once even offered to rinse off a damn fork. “Make it two,” Hermann says, “and you’ve got a deal.”

“You’re a dick,” Newton says, but agrees to the terms.

Hermann knows Newt will get lazy and fall back on the deal in a week or so, but even that one week will be a welcome change from the usual course of things (i.e., Hermann doing everything) and a great big sacrifice for Newton (i.e., eating chips on the sofa in his underwear) he can’t imagine is worth it. All to pay $20 to sit in the back of a tractor full of hay and be shaken and jostled around for half an hour. Absurd.

“It’s fun. It’s a fall tradition,” Newton shouts over the engine, “like dressing up as a slutty nurse or remaking ‘Halloween’ for the tenth time.” A woman sitting across from them pulls two children closer to her knees and shoots Newton a dirty look; Newton smiles sheepishly. “Dressing up as a wholesome, chaste nurse,” he corrects, “who—”

They drive over a particularly large bump, and Newton bounces off his bale of hay and to the wooden planks of the tractor bed at Hermann’s feet. “Ow.”

Hermann rolls his eyes and offers a hand. “Here we are, Newton,” he says, helping him to his knees with a grunt, “up you go—”

“Thanks, mom,” Newton says. He squeezes back in next to Hermann, wriggling strictly more than necessary, elbow jostling into Hermann’s side; Hermann jabs him back with his own elbow. “Anyway, it’s important for us to, you know, do that kind of stuff now. Normal stuff. Annual traditions.” His eyes flicker down to his boots. “Together. You and me.”

Hermann coughs. He knows the point Newton is trying to make, at least: until recently, they haven’t had the time to do these sorts of things, or even the time to consider these sorts of things—it was difficult to put an effort into making annual traditions when the odds were high they wouldn’t survive that year, let alone the next. And Hermann would know. He calculated the odds himself. “You and me,” he echoes. 

It’s their first autumn they’re settled in as roommates. Colleagues. Friends. It makes sense. Friends make traditions together. Newton is only his friend.

(The Newton of now is far more mellow than the Newton Hermann shared a laboratory with for nearly a decade. He’s less prone to shouting. Less prone to arguments. More prone to listening to Hermann. Softer, somehow, even physically, his hair a bit longer, his stubble a bit scruffier, his cheeks a bit fuller. It’s different—not better, not worse, but different. Hermann finds it suits him. Hermann finds it suits him very, very well. Sometimes, when Newton shuffles around in the early mornings in nothing but boxers and a hoodie, when he sits next to Hermann on their couch and offers him coffee with a smile, when he packs Hermann lunch and doodles a few Sharpie hearts on the brown bag, Hermann doesn’t want to be just his friend.)

“I’m surprised you’ve never done one of these before,” Newton is saying. “Didn’t you grow up on a farm?”

“It wasn’t an actual farm,” Hermann says. “But there were—chickens. And an old barn.” There was a broken-down and rusted old tractor in the barn when they bought the property, and plenty of fields (though quite overgrown), so Hermann imagines it’d been a farm at least at some point in time. It wasn’t when he lived there.

The answer seems to satisfy Newton. “My dad used to drive us out to the middle of nowhere to go on these every October,” he says. The wind is blowing the hair from his face, and he’s smiling in that way that makes Hermann feel funny—makes his chest tighten up, his pulse race. “Hayride, then pumpkin picking. Then we’d drive all the way home to carve them for our front step.” Another elbow against Hermann’s side. “We should totally go pumpkin-picking next weekend.”

“What’s the point? We can just go to the shops for one. Probably half the price.”

“Yeah, but that’s not fun,” Newton says.

The tractor hitch jerks and jostles them again, and Hermann’s back hits the wooden bench hard. “This isn’t particularly fun either,” he snaps. “It’s uncomfortable, it’s crowded, it’s bloody cold, too—” It’s freezing, actually, only more so because they’re moving. Hermann’s already planning a hot shower when they get home. 

“You’re such a baby,” Newton says. 

“A baby?”

“Here I am,” Newton says, “trying to make memories with my best friend—” Before Hermann can even begin to comment on his choice of words, Newton is suddenly yanking off his flannel shirt—leaving himself wearing nothing but his jeans and a tight t-shirt—and tossing it at Hermann. “Just wear this and stop whining.”

Hermann stares at it dumbly. “Your—?”

“Yes,” Newton says. “My flannel. It’s warm. You’re gonna look dumb with it over your sweater, but you’ll be warmer.” When Hermann opens his mouth to protest, because it’s Newton’s flannel, Hermann won’t take it and let him freeze instead, Newton shakes his head and shoves it against Hermann’s chest. “I’m serious, Hermann. I gotta a lot of body heat. I’ll survive.”

Hermann pulls it on over his sweater. It’s large on Newton—Newton, who’s shorter than Hermann, but stockier and nowhere near as skinny—which means it fits easily over all of Hermann’s layers, and it is, indeed, very warm, though it makes Hermann feel a bit like a marshmallow. It also smells like Newton: like his aftershave, his Old Spice deodorant, his fruity shampoo, the coffee he manages to spill on himself every single day. It’s like being wrapped up in Newton’s arms. Like a great big hug. (Or so Hermann assumes; he and Newton don’t make a habit of hugging.)

"I look a ridiculous,” Hermann declares. 

“You look cuuuuute,” Newton says, grinning, and knocks the heel of his right boot against Hermann’s left oxford. “Like a big, puffy—”

“Three months, Newton,” Hermann warns. “Three months—“

He means to tack on, retroactively, to Newton’s dishwashing sentence, but they go over another bump, and this one sends Hermann losing his balance and falling forward right into Newton’s lap. “Whoops,” Newton laughs. Hermann blinks dazedly up at him. “You okay, dude?”

Even sideways, and hovering above Hermann with his hair in his face, Newton is distressingly handsome. Hermann’s always found him distressingly handsome. It’s very unfair. “Yes,” Hermann says. “I lost my balance.” The wind carries another whiff of Newton’s deodorant towards him, and his mouth goes dry. He feels dizzy. “Er—would you mind, Newton—?”

It’s Newton’s turn to help him straighten back up; though, when he’s finished, he doesn’t move his arm out from behind Hermann’s back, but curls his fingers around Hermann’s waist instead. “A pumpkin,” he says, breath puffing out warm against the shell of Hermann’s ear, and Hermann must fight to not shiver, “from an actual pumpkin patch. We can each carve a side. How about that?”

“Only if you clean up the mess,” Hermann relents, finding it very difficult to deny Newton anything at the moment.

Newton’s grin returns. He gives Hermann’s waist a squeeze. “Deal.”

#newmann #maria's fanfiction tag #they gay. #newts-geiszler

[goffilolo]

Demise!Izuku as a Youtuber?

Yep! You heard me right. Demise server is a strange little land, full of strange little ideas, unfortunitely this one idea in particular wasn’t so little. So without further ado here’s all the shit we came up with in the server in regards to izuku as a youtuber within demise!au:

If Izuku was a YouTuber can you imagine the fucking chaos dumpster fire his channel would be

He's be like an edgy twink Jenna marbles(edited)

Doing Me time every damn day

bandit is jennas dogs

tenya is julien

He'd have weird ass videos like dipping bandits feet in red pet dye then putting a sign on him that says "you pet and you'll meet the last person who dared to"(edited)

And he's also make videos about him breaking into UA and interrupting classes and stuff

"hey gamers, today we're breaking into UA to see my boyfriend and read all of my friend's secret files"

And a video just of him filing Aizawa in weird places and at the end putting him on an inflatable mattress and watching him float away 

He wakes up in Canada

They don't know how or why

He just attaches a go-pro to trash bandit and let's him run wild. He probably has a seriesJust letting him loose in weird places

DONT LET TRASH BANDIT EAT AIZAWA'S SLEEPING BAG AT 3AM | VERY SCARY"hey guys so today ill be doing the 'How many bottles of quil can i steal before i get caught by Tsukabitch' challange. feel free to make a video of your own!" 

He probably dyes Bandit according to holidays and puts him as the profile picture. The kicker is, he only does it for holidays that his country doesn't celebrate

Like 4th of july

And Canada day

"Hewo soulless fuckers it is me your overlord, King of the soulless fuckers. Today I'll be going up to people in the streets and telling them that I killed God and Satan. But y'all know me, that's not enough. So I'll be asking them which one I killed first and if they get it wrong I take a shot of quil. The quil I'll be taking is the plain ol kind so don't worry your little marshmallow heads about it." 

He only makes text posts in OwO speak this just makes me realise demise!izuku would make a great youtuber

He would twitch stream all the time doing the weirdest shit for hours on end

"what is up gamews! today i wiww be weviewing the new game cawwed life! i have been pwaying it fow about 16 yeaws now and i have to say it's pwetty bad my guys!"

I feel like he'd be absurdly popular and whenever someone mentions him and they look up the channel they are like "wth have I stumbled upon?!"

I'm just imagining what his front page would look like

The seasonal trash bandit profile picture, the banner would be a flaming hellscape with people he dislikes burning and trash bandit looming on low opacity in the background 

(He made it so that only people who view it on TV get the full experience.)

He probably has his own segment on buzzfeed unsolved

Not talking

Its about him

The intro video would just be him staring into the camera while mixing together a horrible concoction of quil then downing it without breaking eye contact(edited)

His about section is written in 3 different types of code and it's all in owo if you manage to crack it

i love demise|!izuku as a youtube cryptid

Clown Speak and OwO speak mixed together

I feel like in the beginning Izuku was this obscure YouTuber that you only find out about if someone in the know tells you about it until a bigger YouTuber found him out on a deep dive video and just couldn't stop watching yes

i imagine once he gets big people from react channel would invite him to react to videos of people reacting to his videos 

What if in one of his videos he started acting like his old self just to freak everyone out. He didn't say anything about it instead he talked about hero analysis with a bright smile and trail off into muttering a few times only to blush when he realized it. He have his hair in a ponytail with only bangs framing his face and some messy pieces falling out. Also her be wearing something plain but like old Izuku, maybe hero merch or something. The comment section was just people flipping out and shit

He never acknowledges the video after he made it

No matter how many comments he gets he acts like it doesn't exist

omg you know wha tthat would actually allign with the demise and canon swap places for a da

yand you know what that gives me a lot of feels

the millions of subscribers get to see the old izuku

Maybe after a milestone he would post a video he made in middle school of him analyzing a quirk in video format to make sure it wouldn't get destroyed

And he put a couple videos of younger him after it

But it starts being supporting Izuku

And his present and past self and stuff

PEOPLE MAKE FAN ART first Its all full of trash and memes

What if that picture of canon Izuku meeting demise Izuku was a fan art someone made of his old self meeting the new him 

Kids from his class kinda Piecing together they really screwed up?Some even sending in apologies, perhaps

For mental health day I could see him posting a serious video about what he went through and his time in the mental hospital 

And on national stop bullying day he would talk about his decade of abuse including the details of how the school and teachers fucked up and everything aboutbakugou

izuku using youtrube for shitposting and advocating

And for mothers day he features both Rei and Inko?

Endeavor exposure video

What if Rei helped edit or something?To help pass the time for her

Give her something to do

People love the mysterious editor

I feel like villains watch his content like maybe Dabi

rei and fuyumi sometimes make appearances

Dabi just shows up in the videos

Quickly become faves

I feel like Dabi would become a fan and start crying after seeing his mom happy in one of Izuku's videos

"...and this is rei, my hospital mom and this if fuyumi, her daughter so like my sister she helps me keep my shit together and sometimes gives me quil.." 

dabi crying from seeing his mom happy in some lunatic's youtube videos

“...and this is shin, dont let the looks deceive you this man went to jail"

Shin comes in and covers the cameras a lot

FATHERS DAY IS A PICTURE OF TRASH BANDIT WITH HIS DADS VOICE SCRAMBLED OVER IT

“and this is the local florida woman and her alligator

WHAT IF BNHA VERSE HAD QUIRKLESS AWARENESS WEEKizuku would go ape shit during that week

"who needs a quirk when my dad gave me a gun!"

He would give axe sharpening tips

"Remember kids! Society won't help you, so you gotta help yourself!"

he would make 'how to cook videos' except it would only be quil combos

What if one day he just put quil in the ovenand pulled out a muffin

Remeber, don't try this at home kids." makes A horrifying quil combo "rememer never ever do this even if you have a quirk that allows it." downs the horror concoction

"so today were gonna do my boyriend does my makeup challange and since both me and tenya are dumb and know nothing i borrowed my mums makeup..." 

It’s a given he’s gonna do makeup tutorials. The real question is would they be good or absolutely horrendous?

good or horrendous? Both

Amazing makeup at horrendous things? Hmmm interesting

“Hey guys today I’m turning myself into a real like eldrich abomination with the help of eyeliner and glitter!”

izuku has a whole playlist of videos dedicated to tenya and UA

theyre all jsut shitposty compilations of some footage when tenya isnt looking

Even tho it looks like he couldn't give a fuck he is very selective with which footage makes it online. He's very careful at how much is revealed and makes sure no students or secret identities would be in danger with his content

izuku isnt stupid...hes jsut having a good time

Sneaking into UA highschool by hiding in pro hero eraserhead's sleeping bag | NOT CLICKBAIT

Izuku would totally play carefree and childish games while just being Izuku

Like his animal crossing series

Fucking legendary on his channel in terms of gaming

izuku's sims lets play

it's like a 10 generation long telenovela lowkey based off the todoroki family

He has no straight sims, he recreated UA and class 1a in sims

the wedding of sim izuku and sim tenya is like the biggest party in the sim neighbourhood

He creates endeavor just to lock him in a room with 50 ovens

Omg his draw my life has got to be super depressing

He'd be super blunt and monotone during his whole draw my life going through all of the abuse and bullying that he went through because of his quirklessness and also his suicide attempt and all that jazz(edited) 

izuku would paint on a potato

Izuku would make a get ready with me where he does something totally batshit crazy then ends it with "Ah. Yet another day in my life."

Izuku meets Marie Kondo

“Only keep what brings you joy”

“Well this gun from my father sure brings me joy”

Knifemaking videos but with axes

Izuku decided to do a wardrobe tour and like 4 things were bloodstained which he never addressed. The most popular comment was what happened, which of course he never answered.

Izuku does these new year (like all of the questions from last year) or milestone Q+A’s/AMA's which are basically people just asking a bunch of the things he wouldn't answer or address before. A lot of his viewers write down and timestamp when he does something and doesn't address it. If you don't you'll never hear an answer.

He has his boonk gang phrase which is probably like Bandit gang or some shit like that, which he shouts while breaking into places. UA dorm rooms, UA facility office, UA, Hero Agency’s, Endeavour's bedroom (Don't ask), etc. 

He has a variety of videos where he does things from different communities. For example he has a few hair tutorial and following hair tutorial videos. Same for makeup.I feel like Izuku would also have some dresses and slutty Halloween costumes that be put on in a video all while looking like someone who just had finals and was studying for 4 days straight beforehand.

At like 4AM a thought hit Izuku to have Trash Bandit meet Kouta for the first time and learn what his sheep talks about and what he has to say. Needless to say he took his camera, went to UA, stormed the dorms, went up to the shy kid sheep in hand, looked him dead in the eye, and asked “What is my sheep saying.” bandit speaks and Kouta goes from confused and slightly scared to disgusted and horrified. What did Bandit say? Who the fuck knows…

Izuku loves analysis and while he doesn't do it for heroes anymore when he misses it too much sometimes he does it with tv shows or other things.

Idk what yet but Izuku is weirdly good at something and only showed it on camera once. (He's casually known to be a good artist) Whatever he's good at he did it once for a video and it's in one of the most popular compilation videos of him. 15 minutes of Izuku being a cinnamon roll.

Izuku has a shit ton of videos featuring the UA kids. He has some playlists dedicated to certain ones even if all you see is the back of their head.

Any proceeds Izuku manages to get (he is popular but he gets demonetized a lot) goes to different charities for the quirkless.

He made only 1 serious cooking video on his birthday, but instead of using a knife he used an axe.

He has a video called “My sharp things (tour)” where he just shows off all of his knives and axes and shit along with a massive pair of scissors he got Momo to make.

Izuku makes videos of himself destroying endeavor merch while staring at the camera.

#demise!au #bnha #youtuber!au #boku no hero academia #midoriya izuku #word vomit

[taggedmemes]

SENTENCE MEME ⟶ LEGACIES / 1.03 – 1.04 always feel free to tweak the sentence to fit your muse.

“Why are we being punished?”

“You’re being punished because you started a brawl at a charity football game.”

“You weren’t mad last night.”

“I was mad last night, but my undying love for my daughters just happened to trump my rage.”

“You’re lucky that it’s just community service and not actual jail time.”

“My response was totally proportional considering the levels of abuse I was forced to endure.”

“If anyone should take the blame, it’s [name]!”

“Nice job throwing [name] under the bus.”

“You only play by the rules when you don’t need something from me.”

“I can’t drag you or anyone else any further into this until I figure out what’s going on.”

“There’s no way in hell I’m picking up their garbage.”

“He said be without drama, and I am feeling a rage attack coming on, so I will be remaining drama-free over there.”

“Do you want to explain why you kept lying?”

“I got an idea to make some money.”

“We ain’t got nothing to apologize for.”

“It wields the power to save the world. Or destroy it.”

“It is not fair that she gets to know secrets your own daughter doesn’t.”

“At least now you know why I’m so screwed up.”

“You have a future in waste management.”

“Cleaning up messes it kind of my thing.”

“Your sister is kind of a dumpster fire.”

“Why do you always pick fights?”

“He has the hormones of a teenager and impulse control of a preschooler.”

“My last crush was actual satan incarnate.”

“The world is a scary place for someone like you.”

“You’re probably better off without me anyway.”

“It might not have seemed like I appreciated it, but I did.”

“I’m not going without you.”

“He chose to fight evil on their behalf.”

“I’m not sure knowing that will make them feel any better.”

“These secrets are gonna tear us all apart.”

“A week ago, I would have said fairytales and folklore were just stories.”

“A few days ago, we were confronted by the existence of a dragon, and today we were terrorized by a gargoyle come to life.”

“If you’re boning in the woods, I’m gonna kill you.”

“Oh come on, I’m a lovable virgin.”

“I’m gonna close my eyes and when I open them everything is gonna be fine.”

“It won’t hurt to assume the worst.”

“I’m telling you, this ain’t on me.”

“I guess I can set aside my differences for a day, because that’s what heroes do.”

“She battles one gargoyle and suddenly she’s Mother Teresa.”

“You’re gonna be real embarrassed when I prove you wrong.”

“I’m not looking for a social lecture.”

“Are you still thinking about murdering him?”

“Any idea about what to do with him while we search for missing mean girls?”

“These clothes are from 1993!”

“I know. Keep my head down, make myself useful, don’t pick fights.”

“I think you might be of some use today.”

“I was making an entrance, mophead.”

“Sorry, was having flashbacks to my freshman year here.”

“Get your wedgie trauma in check, or leave.”

“Try not to deliberately alienate everyone while the rest of us try to save the world.”

“This isn’t a contest.”

“This is a mission for a hero and her league of whatevers.”

“Screw that, I work alone.”

“Would you like to be the Robin to my Batwoman?”

“The wolves usually eat outside.”

“I’m still trying to wrap my head around this being a normal conversation here.”

“As fun as this hurricane of toxic masculinity is, I have to go.”

“And that’s where I had my first kiss with a toilet.”

“I’m sorry, is the fact that I’m not openly hostile to you make it seem like we’re back to being friends?”

“This is all just making me very nervous.”

“You have no idea how human high schools work.”

“He keeps trying to get me to buy his mixed tape.”

“My friendship with her doesn’t define me.”

“Are all of you private school kids this creepy?”

“What’s with the performance anxiety?”

“You smell like gummy bears.”

“Looks like you’re gonna have to trust your own gene pool for once.”

“I’m about to tell you three things, all equally horrifying.”

“You are a horrible liar.”

“I was invited to try out for the cheerleading team.”

“Who are you right now and what is on your head?”

“It’s like every TV show that old people watch.”

“Trusting you is what got us into this mess in the first place.”

“Do you want to play good cop or bad cop, because I don’t think emo cop is a thing.”

“While you were off making friends, I did some sleuthing of my own.”

“Maybe you forgot what it’s like to be on this side of the conversation.”

“It’s not me, it’s you.”

“I didn’t kill her, so y’all gotta get the hell outta my face.”

“Let’s go, it’s hero time.”

“Next thing I remember, I woke up in a ditch.”

“It’s the mother of all hickeys.”

“Everything’s fine, you’re just a little slutty.”

“You think I wanna sit and listen to that for all eternity?”

“You can either submit, or bleed and then submit.”

“Just stay away from me.”

“Not everyone wants to be supernatural. Some people just want to be normal.”

“I’m not gonna tell her what to do with her body.”

“I think her soul just got on my shoes.”

“She’s puking her guts out, literally.”

“Maybe the monster’s been in front of us all along.”

“None of this started happening until you showed up.”

“I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“You made my life miserable.”

“You don’t get to pretend I don’t exist.”

“This is nerd porn, not real life.”

“Whatever spun this is gonna come back and eat us.”

“Whatever you’re thinking of doing, don’t.”

“You’re gonna have to trust me for once.”

“You can’t compel her not to grieve.”

“Hold on to the good stuff, because it’s the key to getting through this.”

“I didn’t think that I needed anyone else.”

“So much for my plan to spend the day as a normal girl.”

“It felt nice to be part of the team, until you all accused me of being a monster.”

“It’s gonna take some time to trust you again.”

“All day long you ridiculed me and then hung me out to dry.”

“Being a hero is not more important than being safe.”

“The only reason we’re alive today is because we broke the rules.”

“The last couple of days have proven that you can’t protect us from everything.”

“This is that moment where people say parents lose all control, isn’t it.”

“I love you. Sort of.”

“I guess I felt like launching a revolution.”

“Don’t disrespect her like that.”

“There’s enough monsters out there, we don’t have to become them.”

“I’ve had my suspicions, but I could never confirm them.”

“If they’re a threat, I’m coming for them.”

“If you threaten them, I’m coming for you.”

#rp meme #roleplay meme #sentence meme #sentence starters #starter sentences #KIND / SENTENCE. #KIND / IN CHARACTER. #BASED ON / TV SHOW.

[incorrectpredators]

a summary of what personalities i give the boys

The Dumb Boys

kevin fiala - the slutty dumb boy. usually flirting with someone else. young, dumb, and full of You Know ;) has been essentially adopted/taken in by kyle turris

juuse saros - not so much dumb as he is clueless. he is like a little baby whom needs someone to tell him what to do essentially adopted/taken in by pekka rinne

ryan johansen - the greasy dumb boy pt 1

craig smith - the greasy dumb boy pt 2

The Fathers

pekka rinne - the most mischievous of “the fathers”, most likely to joke around with and prank his adoptees, still loves taking care of them though, most notable children: juuse saros, eeli tolvanen, miikka salomaki, patrik laine, sebastian aho, mikko rantanen, and Possibly connor brown (based on photographic evidence i have). someone please stop him

kyle turris - the new father. he’s new around here and he has already adopted a child. he’s a little messy with it bc he’s so new to it but is the most organized of the fathers. most notable children: kevin fiala

dan hamhuis - hammer is technically new here, but he really isn’t. he may be just over a month younger than pekka, but is the oldest soul of the fathers. he is wise and the most responsible of the fathers. notable children: none so far, but that may be because he just got back to nashville and is having to take care of Everyone.

The Pretty Boys

roman josi - viewed as the prettiest boy, but is he?, the Dumb pretty boy. he literally admitted he never read a book. thats very concerning to me. he is the residential dumb pretty boy, but kevin fiala is definitely coming for his role. “can we talk? one ten to another?”

pk subban - the answer is no. jos is not the prettiest boy. i love josi but pk just came in and not only took his spot as prettiest defenseman but is also the prettiest player in general. he’s the pretty boy who is just here to have a genuinely good time. he’s also pretty smart, do not doubt him. he is regina george if regina george wasnt white, a girl, and a complete asshole. he is possibly the nicest on the team. “i’m an eleven but continue”

The Cryptids

ryan hartman - hartsy just got here from chicago and he is still a mystery to me. my profile may say filip forsberg is secretly the grunch road monster but hartsy is definitely the most likely to be an actual cryptid. i think it’s possible he’s the goatman. so watch your back shane madej bc hartsy is coming for you.

dan hamhuis - listen, i may not like the fact that we signed him but i do love hammer. im a little disappointed he’s never played for the sharks though, as i really want to call him a hammerhead shark. but hammer is a cryptid, perhaps simply because i have no idea what he’s been up to since he left nashville. how well will he mesh w our d core this year? is he happy he finally got his number five in nashville? does he like beets? i know nothing about him.

frederick gaudreau - i was tempted to put him in the final category of this post but i just couldn’t. freddie hockey is a pretty boy, but he isn’t around enough to be classified With the pretty boys. he’s definitely a cryptid though. who is he? does he like his nickname? does he have any pets? did he ever get his damn locker? these are all questions i may never get the answer to.

The Inbetweeners/Other

note: this is a category that is a combination of players who 1. had traits of at least one category, but not enough to be put in it 2. players who are alone in their own categories and 3. players who technically probably shouldn’t be on this blog, but are

eeli tolvanen - exhibits cryptid traits, but isnt used in that role on here. tends to hang out with the younger guys (juuse and kevin most often) but is a bit of a wildcard. he is usually being flirted with by kevin or being paired of with his “boyfriend” (note that this is a joke blog, i dont actually believe him and the player who will be talked about later on are dating. it’s simply a joke and i tag posts that show hints of any of the players being in a relationship as “rpf” because i know even just the implication can make some ppl uncomfortable) is mostly known for being unskilled in the comforting/emotion side of things (“would a glowstick make you feel better?”) and tends to be a bit blunt or cynical at times, although he might throw around a joke or two if necessary.

filip forsberg - is both a cryptid and a pretty boy, but not enough to be put in those categories. is the meme loving fuck of the jofa line. known for fidget spinners and being put down for chicken (as he’s watching his figure)

viktor arvidsson - could be one of “The Fathers” but he really isn’t. he is just forced to be because JOEY AND FIL DON’T KNOW HOW TO BEHAVE THEMSELVES. but neither does he so it tends to be a big old mess when they’re together.

calle jarnkrok - calle is just tired ok. he’s tired and pretty grumpy. he’s a new dad and he’s surrounded by grown adults who act like children, so cut him some slack please. known for tearing up at a marshmallow rendition of himself and hanging out with ekky

mattias ekholm - ah the swedish elk himself. is also a new father and is usually just too tired to even show up in my quotes. when he does, he’s usually hanging out with calle. 

anthony bitetto - PROBABLY should’ve been in the dumb boys category but im not going back to put him in there. a flat earther? most likely. i really need the colorado avalanche to send colin back please he was the only smart one on the team now tony is lost. also im not entirely sure him and colton sissons are seperate ppl.

colton sissons - is the most normal of the group. but is also lowkey dumb. doing his best i think? i hope? once again im not entirely convinced him and tony are seperate people

colin wilson - one of two players who fall into the  “once a pred always a pred” tag. usually seen trying to help tony understand.... literally anything.... and being mourned by me. i miss him. colorado give him back to me :(

james neal - the other “once a pred always a pred” player. he doesn’t appear often but when he does usually something about hating himself is involved. he’s a greasy boy and used to be the pred’s greaseball but now that he’s gone craig smith has taken his place as Main Greaseball

sebastian aho - isn’t on here a lot, but he’s mentioned from time to time. one of pekka’s kids but their relationship is strained due to aho not being on the preds.

miro heiskanen - the Honorary Pred of the account. he may be a dallas star but he’s a pred in my heart. most commonly used as the goofy sidekick boyfriend of eeli tolvanen, which is taken from a commercial they were in together. i joked about them being forbidden lovers and now its just the role he plays on this account. all posts that (keep in mind, i mean it jokingly) refer to miro and eeli as being boyfriends is tagged with “rpf” so you can blacklist it if the implication of players dating makes you uncomfortable

#long post // #long post #not a quote #this is genuinely for my own reference bc im so forgetful sksksk

[peachships]

1, 2, 5, 10, 12 for the rile you up self ship asks

I'm gonna answer these for Gen.ji since I don't talk about him much and these asks got me riled up! As they should!

1) what’s a Hot Take you have about your f/o?

He's transmasc. We know before he was almost killed by his brother that he was the partier, probably slept around, all that jazz, but having an openly trans potential heir to the clan go to parties and just be unapologetically slutty?

So yeah when Han.zo was sent to kill him and ovw remade his body, he was able to finally get the body he wanted. Basically Han.zo gave him free top and bottom surgery HDAKHDSKDHSKDH

2) on what do you disagree with other fans of your f/o?

That he worships A.ngela. Mainly Gen//cy shipping, even from a fandom view it's gross? Because she helped rebuild his body he worships her? And she expects him to do so? It just comes across as forced and a saviour complex :/

5) what’s the dumbest thing you’ve heard about your f/o, either on the internet or irl?

That he was clearly meant to be with L.ena (T.racer) when she's clearly a lesbian? Yeah, online gaming is weird. Also that he should be angry 24/7. Homie read the wiki, he traveled the world and found inner peace

10) how did you feel when you realized “oh of course i had to like That Character”?

Well to be honest, I made one remark years ago about how he was hot and never thought twice about it, so when I finally accepted that I liked him, I was almost embarrassed with how long it took me to accept it hdkshdsj but I was like "Of course I had to pick the tiny ninja twink [beloved]"

12) aren’t you tired of being nice? this is an excuse to rant.

People are so mean to him and for what? I think it's because of the "I need healing" meme, and I personally have met MANY asshole Gen players, but that's the player not the character. They also call him boring, but like! He was the potential heir to a crime syndicate that dealt with fortune and weapons and had STILL refused to work with the biggest crime faction on earth and senT THE FIRST HEIR TO KILL THE OTHER ONE HOW AMAZING AND SCARY IS THAT. THEN, then he SURVIVED being slashed and left with literally just a head, left arm, and left tiddy. (Shi.mada bros be like "none honour left tit") so not only does he survive being fucking murdered, he decides to travel the world and find inner peace by a monk who is barely old enough to drink alcohol and he's like "hey dude you're younger than me but I'm like hella angry can you help" and Zen.yatta is like "sure man" AND THIS MONK, who accepted HIS inner peace because he looked into the Iris, the universe, and saw vast, empty nothingness and went "ah okay cool life is meaningless but in a good way" taught Gen how to feel emotions again and in the process of this he managed to WHOLE-HEARTEDLY FORGIVE HIS BROTHER and even tried to talk to him! To tell him he forgives him!! And even in game they have dialogue that's like "brother I forgive you" "but I have not forgiven myself" and it's!! So good!!!

So he's not boring y'all are just too boring to read the wiki

#i felt many emotions #and that rant may make no sense but that's okay! #in this house we love and forgive Han.zo #the sun on my feathers #banana smoothie #peachy asks

[robininthelabyrinth]

"New writer ask meme: based on my body of work, what’s something you’d like to see me try to write?" like. you wrote a story within a /menu/ so you can take this as a prompt or just respond but. if you can make a menu compelling, what about something else. like a professor binn's history lecture, swapping in for the teacher and subject of your choice, but something where the students have fallen asleep five minutes in but there's a compelling story under the surface. idk if it's possible, (cont)

re: the hist lecture thnx for letting me know tumblr didn’t send it! can’t remember xactly what was in each ½ of the ask but short version: if any1 can make a dry lecture (note: not just any lecture, but a boring one), abt history or other, compelling, it’d be u. just as people say that x celeb reading the phone book could be cool, I feel the same could be true for u, which brings me to thing I’d like to see u write 2: a phone book story. idk how the flip it would work but it’d be interesting

————————————————————————————————

I think that my Makers of History fic might fulfill your first craving - it’s not boring, but it’s written in the style of a history textbook :) 

That being said, your SECOND prompt irresistibly caught my eye.

It’s not a phone book, but I hope you still enjoy!

Fic:  Central City Classifieds: December 2017 Edition (direct link to Ao3)

Fandom: Flash, Arrow, Legends of TomorrowPairing: Leonard Snart/Mick Rory, suggestions of unfulfilled Mick Rory/Caitlin Snow

Summary: Central City Picture News is a respectable news organization, with serious journalism, editorials, opinion columns, sports coverage, arts review, and international news.

So why does everyone keep reading the classifieds?

(Answer: because they’re hilarious.)

———————————————————————————————–

CENTRAL CITY CLASSIFIEDS - December 2017

New Business Opening:Super Tailoring: For All Your Superhero or Supervillain NeedsAsk for ~Leo~–New Business Opening:Supersuit Construction Corp.Super-suits for Superheroes, Supervillains, and More!Theme-appropriate nicknames included!Ask for C. RamonOur Motto: “We make proper supersuits here – our competitors should just go back to their stupid earth where the bad guys need suspenders to hold their outfits together.”–New Business Opening:Super-RepairsWe Fix Mistakes In Science Done By Supersuit Construction Corp.Ask for Harry W.–Announcement:All creditors to whom Harrison Wells owed money, please come to STAR Labs for a pleasant surprise. Ask for C. Ramon; he’ll direct you to the right place.–New Business Opening:TherapyVery Reasonable Prices – Sliding Scale AvailableFree to Superheroes and SupervillainsPLEASE YOU SHOULD ALL GO GET THERAPY RIGHT NOWAsk for ~Leo~

–Announcement:39 Surprisingly High-End Possibly-From-The-Future Toasters for Sale. No returns.Ask for B. Allen.–For sale, goods:One Cold Gun, barely used. Must go to good home. Must agree to take angst, hallucinations, budding drinking problem, and mourning of 30 years of partnership and marriage with you.–New Business Announcement:John Constantine – Exorcist, Demonologist and Master of the Dark ArtsIn Town for a Limited Time Only!–Wanted:Better security system capable of removing unwanted stowaways from advanced-future time ship. Call and ask for Sara.–Wanted:Any security system. At all. Please. Villains just walk in all the time.Call STAR Labs.–New Business Opening:Legendary Security ServicesBe Protected By the Legends of Tomorrow(no warranties apply, please ensure you have appropriate insurance before hiring)–Job Opening:Legendary Security ServicesSeeking Security Consultant – Superhero Experience WelcomeMust have Zambezi Totem To ApplyAsk for A. Jiwe and Z. Tomaz.All Time Periods Welcome.–Wanted:Any OTHER security system.Call STAR Labs.–New Business Opening:Colorful Light Show & Anger Management TherapyProcess Your Emotions, See Beautiful ColorsAsk for R. G. Biv.–Job Opening:Individual with meta powers wanted for long-term scheme against the Flash.Applications can be left by the statue of the Thinker in Central City Art Museum.–Announcement:Are you fucking kidding me?? Does that actually work?? – B. Allen.–Job Opening:New Mentor Figure. Must Not Be Evil.Harrison Wells doppleganger preferred.No individuals named Eobard need apply.Stringent interview process being implemented.Applications can be sent to STAR Labs. Honestly, just walk in, there’s no security system.–New Business Opening:Outdoor Wedding ServicesPlanning Your Outdoor Wedding? Worried About the Weather?Don’t Be!Call M. Mardon To Ensure Your Perfect Day!(Also available to ruin your exes’ wedding, but it costs extra.)–New Business Opening:Welcome to The FLASH Museum!Learn all about your favorite local Supehero in intimate, behind-the-scenes detail!Call: the H.R. Wells Estate.–Cease and Desist Order Lawsuit Filed Against the Flash Museum. C/O the Flash, STAR Labs.–While I’m at it, Cease and Desist Order Filed Against Local “Team Flashers” Club. It’s not funny! C/O the Flash, STAR Labs.–Wanted:Someone capable of making puppets in a wide variety of shapes and sizes.Preferably soft and capable of resisting impact; designed to be used in therapy sessions.Ask for ~Leo~–For sale, goods:Slutty clothing, barely used. Very reasonable price, just need to get rid of it.Ask for Snow at Star Labs.–For sale, goods:All clothing in my closet. Basically free. Need to get rid of it in revenge.Ask for Frost at Star Labs.–For sale, services:All the ice you could possibly want, no need for ice machine.Ask for Frost at Star Labs. Say that Snow sent you.–For sale, services:Under-the-table medical care. Reasonable prices.Feel free to report to the local medical licensing board afterwards if dissatisfied.Ask for Snow at Star Labs. Say that Frost sent you.–Announcement:Local man with flamethrower seeking attractive girl with ice powers for NSA good time while he is in the present location/time. Willing to annoy additional personality for free.–Announcement:Nice try. No.– Snow and Frost–Business Announcement:Therapy – now offering relationship and family counsellingAlso lessons in pre-planning, emotional openness, and honest communicationAsk for ~Leo~–New Business Opening:Ever wanted to swim with the sharks, but afraid or unwilling to pay for travel? Never fear!Swimming Lessons with King SharkReasonable prices.Call ARGUS for additional details.–Wanted:Secret room for plotting and/or emotional processing of grief. No spying devices allowed.If you have any locations, call John Constantine, Leo Snart, or Mick Rory.Payment available only in Earth-X cash, since the other two are broke.–Announcement:Oliver Queen and Felicity Smoak are pleased to announce that they will be wed in a ceremony on the Star City Central Green at the end of this week.–Announcement:Another one?! Didn’t you two get married ALREADY?A Totally Not Bitter Central City Picture News Journalist–Announcement:Oliver Queen and Felicity Smoak are pleased to announce that they will be renewing their vows at the end of this week, this time before a rabbi and their friends.–Announcement:You didn’t have a rabbi the FIRST time?Noah Kutler & Donna Smoak–Announcement:What the hell are you two doing filing a joint newspaper announcement???Felicity Smoak–Announcement:Answer us about the rabbi question.Noah Kutler & Donna Smoak–Announcement:They would’ve been able to use the rabbi we used at my wedding, but they got him killed.Frost–Announcement:That was MY wedding, not yours!Snow–Announcement:Best wishes to Felicity Smoak and Oliver Queen on their upcoming vow renewal.We’re sorry for accidentally setting your entire extended family on you.Team Flash–Announcement:Did you REALLY re-gift us the espresso machine we gave you??Oliver Queen–Announcement:It was on your registry in exactly the same way it was on ours.Iris West.–Wanted:Someone willing to obtain a list of ingredients, some very esoteric, without asking too many questions as to why. Speed of the essence – need to get all the ingredients before the next full moon.Call John Constantine, Leo Snart, or Mick Rory.–Wanted:An army willing to destroy the world and worship at the feet of GRODD.No need to apply. Just think the name of GRODD and we will come for you.–For Sale:Telepathy-Resistant Emergency Evacuation Devices, available to help you resist Grodd’s mind control long enough to escape. The newest fashion statement. Also, basically free.Available at STAR Labs.–Job Opening:Qualified therapists with an advanced understanding of ethics, client confidentiality, and self-defense. As many as possible. At once. This is so much worse than I could have possibly believed.Ask for ~Leo~–New Business Opening:Freaky Supervillain Carnival(Totally NOT a set up trap for the Flash)Come see the Dangerous MIRROR MAZE! The magnificent, nauseating WHIRLYGIG!Job opening available for a clown, preferably with teeth, to keep away certain unwanted old acquaintances.Call S. Scudder and R. Dillon.–Wanted:Surveillance method capable of keeping an eye on three grown men with the capabilities of John Constantine, Leo Snart, and Mick Rory (included for comparison).Something’s up, and Gideon’s not sharing.Must be compatible with 25th century technology.–For sale, goods:Exploding dreidels, for a ridiculously deadly Hannukah prank!Totally not the CCPD trying to trap the Trickster again.Entirely by coincidence, please call the CCPD if you’re interested.–Wanted:Young black men who for a variety of flimsy reasons are no longer currently engaged in active super-heroing except in awesome but sadly brief cameos.We’re making our own club over in Keystone.Call c/o W. West and J. Jackson.–Wanted:Bounty Hunter capable of tracking and eliminating that pesky C. Ramon for having made a crude comment at my precious and perfect daughter.Call Josh (Breacher) on Earth-19–Wanted:Bodyguard capable of protecting me from a crazy overprotective asshole dad who can’t accept the fact that we’re ALREADY SLEEPING TOGETHER.Female bodyguard capable of extreme badassery preferred.Call C. Ramon on Earth-1–Announcement:I, Josh, hereby apologize to my adult daughter for having sought to control her sexuality in such an inappropriate manner. She is free to date whomever she wishes and progress in her relationship at her own chosen speed.Please call off your Amazons.–Business Name Change:Legendary Security Services will now be known as Legendary Amazon Security.Because we’re just that awesome.A. Jiwe, Z. Tomaz, K. Saunders–Police Announcement:Will anyone with any knowledge of what caused that giant blue-green explosion in STAR Labs please call the CCPD immediately? Ask to speak with Detective West.–Retraction:Cold gun no longer available for sale following explosive retrieval process.Bill for all property damage may be directed c/o John Constantine.–Announcement:We are sad to announce that John Constantine has passed away.Please send any bills for property damage care of Zatana.–Announcement:John Constantine is not actually dead. He’s just hiding away on the Waverider again.Personal note: John, if I get one more bill, I’m coming for your balls.Zatanna–Retraction:The reports of John Constantine’s death are greatly exaggerated.We apologize for the inconvenience.He is, however, unavailable to accept any bills.–New Business Opening:Magic Tricks by Abra KadabraMention Harry Potter One More Time And I Will Break My Parole And Kill You All–Invitation:The Epic Len and Leo Welcome Back/Going Away PartyAll Welcome – Bring Presents(Puns preferred)–For sale, goods:One freaky supervillain carnival set up, barely used. Very reasonable price.Have to leave town ASAP because there are now TWO Snarts and that’s two too many.Call S. Scudder and R. Dillon.–Wanted:Seeds for Golden Delicious Apples, Golden Berries, and Golden Corn.Please send to Gotham City, c/o Lisa Snart.–Announcement:Lisa, why are you in Gotham? And what’s with all the plants???With love,Your Concerned Friends and Family

#dccoldwave #mick rory #leonard snart #barry allen #iris west #oliver queen #felicity smoak #john constantine #many others #my fic #Anonymous

[littleredroseonthevalley]

Tumblr User Questionnaire

Rules: Answer these questions and tag some blogs you would like to get to know better.

Thanks for the tag, @mfackenthal

Nickname(s): My granddad calls me his red bird.

Gender: Female

Sign: Leo

Height: 176cm

Time: Half past midnight (Sunday)

Fave band(s): Bands? Abba, The Asteroids Galaxy Tour, Blondie, The Cardigans, The Chainsmokers, Clean Bandit, Coldplay, Gabage, Juli, The Killers, The Pussycat Dolls, Roxette, Métisse and Twenty-One Pilots

Fave solo artist(s): Stromae, Sophie-Ellis Bextor, Shakira, Rita Ora, Pink, Nelly Furtado, Mika, Marina and the Diamonds, Madonna, Louane, Lena Meyer-Mandrut, La Roux, Joyce Jonathan, Dua Lipa and Britney Spears

Song stuck in my head: Get Outta My Waym by Kylie Minogue. I have the musical taste of a 40-year-old gay man.

Last movie I saw: The Shape of Water, and lemme tell you, two hours I’ll never get back.

Last show I watched: The Mick, my reason tells me it’s terrible, but I cannot help but laughing scandalously at the people getting hurt.

When did I create my blog: On New Year’s Eve. Why was I on Tumblr on New Year’s Eve?

What do I post: Is crap a valid answer? No? Then, I guess I post my own original work (Red Rose and Confrontation) and memes. Lots of stupid memes.

Last thing I googled: Department of Philosophy of the University of Pretoria’s phone number. (BTW, @mfackenthal, it’s GMT +3, no Daylight Saving Time).

Do I have any other blogs: Aside from my main blog (@tropicalredbird), I have another to ogle hot celebrities’ abs.

Do I get asks?: Accounting for those asking games, I got around six asks throughout my Tumblr run. 

Why did I chose my URL: Well, this blog was because of my fanfic ‘Red Rose’ and that flower, Lily of the Valley. My main blog has a more interesting story. My granddad told me that the farmers on the Karoo (a South African desert) used to say that, whenever they saw a red bird on a tree, it was because it was going to rain. So when he calls me a red bird, he says that he’s always happy to see me.

Following: 128

Followed by: 52 (Thank you, guys, BTW) 

Average hours of sleep: 5 hours. My life sucks.

Lucky number: 88

Instruments: I play, albeit badly, the piano

What am I wearing: my silk pajamas because I just arrived home, I was on my slutty clothes and I need something soft on my skin

Dream job: Well, when I entered college, I was aiming for a position at the Department of Education. Now, after being a waitress, a French teacher, a gym coach, a dancer on a club (not the exotic type, it was a gay bar), an elder caretaker, a cook, a model and a secretary, I just want to earn more than minimum wage.

Dream trip: I’d like to take on a Grand Tour through Europe. The farthest I’ve ever been was to Mauritius.

Fave food(s): Food. Preferrably with high calorie count.

Nationality: South African, French and Malgasy. It’s a funny story.

Fave song: My grandma used to sing ‘À la Claire Fontaine’ when I was little.

Last book I read: In The Country We Love, by Diane Guerrero

Three Fictional Universes I Want To Join: Man... None, I guess. Like, Hogwarts is a pedagogical nightmare, superheros have all those pesky responsabilities, and don’t even get me started on Game of Thrones.

I tag @theroyalweisme and @boneandfur