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antianakin · 3 months

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It’s me again. If you could rewrite the sequels what would you change?

A lot.

Honestly, I feel like my ideal premise for a sequel trilogy would've been some sort-of combo of Lucas's concept for it and what we got in TFA.

Lucas's concept focused in on the OT trio again which I think would've been a mistake for a number of reasons, and I prefer that TFA chose to set it 30 years beyond the OT and gave us a new trio.

Lucas's concept had Maul and his crime organizations as the main villain which I would've particularly hated, and I do prefer the idea of the dregs of the Empire trying to rise again. There's merit both directions I think, continuing to have a Sith character for the symbolism of it really works for me, but I would've HATED for it to be Maul and I don't feel like the crime organizations were ever enough of a real threat to make them a viable issue for an entire trilogy. I also think there's merit to using a "newer" enemy instead of just bringing in the Empire yet again under a different name (except that Maul and his crime orgs aren't actually new). The dregs of the Empire attempting to come together and recreate what was lost has a lot of impact and feels more like a substantial threat, though, since we know what the Empire was capable of before and it's not hard to throw in a new Darksider to make them more threatening. It feels like it continues the more political aspects of the prior two trilogies to have it keep being the Empire in some form (the PT had what the Empire used to be, the OT had the Empire in truth, and the ST in canon ended up what the Empire became). So I'm mostly open to the options here in terms of what the actual major threat is, I think that having a Sith is necessary, keeping in the theme of the Empire is nice, but I could understand bringing in a newer enemy to show the new Republic having to come together against their first real threat without it feeling repetitive.

But the biggest thing for me that I like about Lucas's concept is that it focused on REBUILDING, both the Republic and the Jedi. The whole trilogy was about taking them from where they were at the end of ROTJ and showing how they were able to build something out of the ashes of the Empire. How do the New Republic and Luke's Jedi come together once more after decades of war and devastation? How are they able to rise up and face the darkness when it comes for them again? It creates a really nice resolution to the story we've gotten so far, where the PT shows how the Republic fell and the Empire came to be, the OT shows how the Empire fell, and then the ST could've shown how the Republic rose again. I think immediately destroying the New Republic and the Jedi in order to put the world back into the place it was during the OT was an ENORMOUS mistake. It's the one major grievance I have against TFA's narrative and the one place that I think the accusation that it was trying to recreate ANH too much actually holds weight. For me, the hopeful ending of TROS doesn't hit very well because now we have to contend with the fact that ROTJ had one too and it didn't last and it all got taken away, so what faith should I have that this time it'll somehow work out differently? We thought the Sith were gone last time, too, we thought Luke and Leia would help rebuild the New Republic and the Jedi last time, too, so what makes this happy ending different from the last one?

So if I were to do a complete overhaul of the entire Sequel Trilogy, that's what I'd do. I'd still set it 30 years post-ROTJ, I'd still bring in a new ensemble cast, but I'd focus on how the New Republic and Luke's Jedi were able to rebuild in that time and how they now have to withstand this new threat, whether it's something akin to the First Order or a completely new kind of enemy. It can be a STRUGGLE, they can have LOSSES, but I think eliminating the entire New Republic and Luke's Jedi in order to just focus on a new "resistance" makes no sense. I want to see this community LEARN FROM THEIR MISTAKES and actually figure out how to fight TOGETHER again, I want to see this world evolve from the one we already know so that they can face a similar enemy or an enemy of similar strength to the one faced in the PT and, this time, they will defeat it because the New Republic stood WITH the Jedi and didn't give in to selfishness and fear and corruption. I like the characters they introduced well enough, I think they're cool and interesting, and I really like the subverted expectations with characters like Finn and Kylo and how those were being set up in TFA, so I'd keep that, too, and maybe just adjust as needed for the slightly changed narrative.

If I had to keep TFA mostly as is and just make tweaks to try to "fix" the rest of the trilogy more to my personal liking, there's probably plenty I COULD make. I'd probably make it so that the destruction of the Hosnian Prime planets didn't completely eradicate the ENTIRE Republic somehow, like maybe some Senators just... weren't there that day or the planets represented in the New Republic still have planetary leaders who come together for some kind of summit to try to throw together a new temporary government really quickly. It's still a massive blow to the New Republic and the resistance maybe has to step up a little in light of that, but it's not left COMPLETELY on its own with no one to ask for help. I'd also have had Luke's Jedi not ACTUALLY be completely killed off, I'd have had him hiding on Ahch-To because that's where he's chosen to hide the survivors he was able to help escape from Kylo's massacre, students he's been continuing to train and teach in the safety of this island no one knows how to find and who are ready and willing to leave their shelter to help the resistance if only Luke could let go of his fears enough to agree to it. I'd even have Leia sort-of AWARE that this is why he's left, why he isn't helping them, even if she doesn't know where he's gone. So even though TFA implies that the New Republic and Luke's Jedi are all gone all over again, you can STILL FIX THAT MISTAKE.

And there's the usual stuff that most people talk about. I'd eliminate Reylo as a thing, obviously, I'd focus in more on Finnrey since they're clearly set up as co-leads and like two halves of one hero and all of that. I wouldn't sideline Finn as a character, I'd make sure his storylines about being Force sensitive and inciting a stormtrooper rebellion got their due in the second film. I'd have made Poe more of an actual second in command to Leia in the second film rather than tossing in Holdo as this unnecessary conflict, so that Poe's growth into a general in the final film actually makes sense. I don't think I'd have set the second film literally like IMMEDIATELY after the first one with no time for the characters to have grown in-between and make it so the timeline is insanely short which means the characters have no time to grow DURING the story either. Either the film needed to do a time jump of sorts to allow for the characters to have grown in-between, or the film itself needed to span across more like months rather than days. I'd have left Kylo as an actual evil character, no emphasis on weird sympathy stuff in the second film, no redemption, I'd have continued what was set up in TFA where he is explicitly NOT going to make a better choice, he's NOT going to be saved by familial love, etc etc. I'd have done something, ANYTHING with Snoke to make him more interesting and not killed him off in the second film. I wouldn't have brought back Palpatine (although connecting Snoke TO Palpatine isn't terrible, even if I would not personally have gone for the clone idea). I wouldn't have made Luke jaded and bitter to the point that he thinks the Jedi should all die, I think that this was out of character for Luke and pulls focus from Rey herself. I'd have done SOMETHING with Rey's parentage to follow-up on what was set up in TFA, made it SOMETHING important and relevant that gets revealed earlier on in the second film so she has time to react to that and grow from it (it didn't HAVE to be Luke's daughter or Palpatine or Obi-Wan or whatever, just... SOMETHING relevant to make the mystery worthwhile).

From a structural standpoint, I'd have hired ONE DIRECTOR to be in charge of the WHOLE TRILOGY and come up with an overall direction and vision for all three films, figure out the answers to the mysteries BEFORE STARTING FILMING so that they can be adequately set up and followed up on as the films progress. Is this a lot of work for one person to do? Yes. Is it still completely and entirely necessary? 1000% yes. This trilogy suffers from a lack of anyone knowing where this story was even HEADING, what the major character beats were going to be, what the major STORY beats were going to be, etc. And also I think the studio should've butted the FUCK OUT and not stepped in to try to make this trilogy somehow palatable to the greatest number of fans possible. I'd prefer a trilogy that had a clear and coherent story that I didn't personally like or agree with than a trilogy that ended up a paint by numbers bullet point sheet lacking in any kind of impact or emotions.

#star wars #sequel trilogy #anti reylo #reylo critical

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galvanizedfriend · 1 year

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2023 WIP List

I saw a writer I really love doing this here and decided to respectfully borrow the idea.

I'm feeling really bummed about writing lately, can't seem to find the least bit of motivation and have jumped from story to story without adding anything of substance over the last month or so. Nothing seems to spark joy. And yet I have thousands of words in half-written stories I'm not sure what to do with. Ideally, I'd like to finish them, but at this point, who knows 🤷‍ So this is a way for me to take stock, do some soul-searching, try to find where my heart is writing-wise at the moment and see if I can manifest some inspo.✨

These are not even all my WIPs, just the ones I have opened at least once in the last year.

▪ Speed Dating 3/3 Klaroline, friends/roommates-to-lovers

Started in June 2022

The final part to my Speed Dating sequel, which is much longer than the original story because I have no self-respect. Klaus and Caroline are roommates and idiots. The OG one-shot had them going on a round of speed dating and failing to connect the dots and realizing that what they really should be doing is sucking face with each other. The sequel is kind of an expanded universe situation, where I wanted to show a little more of their roommie chemistry and push them into situations where they are finally confronted with the reality of their feelings. But that only happens once they start seeing other people because of course.

I have maybe 60% of the final part written but for some reason, after word-vomiting non-stop for a while, I got stuck on a kind of major point in the story. I've tried to start it soooo many times and it just won't go. 🙃 I think I'm looking at a good 6 to 8k words more before it's finished.

▪ Random Fic (not the real title) Klaroline (duh), sorta exes-to-enemies-to-lovers I guess

Started in May 2020

The start of my romantic comedy phase. This predates even my coffee shop AU. It's Caroline and Klaus having a fling that ends very, very badly, but then having to come together again a year later to marry their common friend (and Caroline's ex), Tyler. I wanted it to be quick, witty and light-hearted and then at some point it got some very emotional bits in the middle and turned into something else completely. I guess it's still mostly light-hearted, but it has some ~~substance, whatever that means. I think it's an okay fic, and it's 55k words, which is not too bad, but then does anyone still read 55k all at once these days? lol

The fic is finished. I think I wrapped it up in April last year, so a year ago. But I haven't been able to go back and read it again. I've tried, and I've started it so many times, but then I always stop and never pick it back up. But like. 55k words of finished fic here. 🤷‍

▪ Pendulum Klaroline, soulmates!AU but make it sad

Originally in January 2019, started rewriting in July 2020 (lol)

I have issues with this story. It's the saddest damn thing I've ever written, but it's also my favorite storyline I've ever come up with. It got some hate at the time, I don't know why, but also some of the most heartfelt comments/responses I've ever received on any story (and I still keep them all!), so I think this is one where you either love it or hate it. But because I feel so protective of it, I have problems (of the personal brand) leaving it out in the open, and I don't want to repost it until I'm absolutely sure it's ok. As you can see, it was one of my first ever fics, so the writing wasn't the best. But I still love it, I don't care. I keep wanting to make the writing match how much I love the idea, and I don't know if that's possible. 🙃

It's the rare AU I write entirely from Klaus' POV, which is something else. I'm not sure I'm that good with Klaus. It's also an AH, but it has a little magic twist. Every time Klaus dies, his life just restarts from the exact same point. He's born on the same year, at the same place, to the same parents. Except he remembers his previous lives, and so he accumulates the knowledge of hundreds and hundreds of previously lived years each time he's reborn. And then shit happens.

First time I posted this, it was 57k words long. I have successfully finished rewriting the first of three parts, which is around 14k words, but as you can see, I have been in this process since 2020 (!!!), so I need to go back and tinker with that as well. May God have mercy on my soul.

▪ Mystic Tours (not the real title) Klaroline, friends-to-lovers but also fake dating

Started in January 2023

This was inspired by Lovelight Farms by B.K. Borison, except it's not a Christmas story, and it doesn't actually have any farms. It has Klaroline fake dating to try and win a contest that can potentially save Caroline's failing business, and also loads of side-characters Sound of Settling style (including a horde of Mikaelsons and Bonnie and Enzo as Caroline's co-workers). I really like writing stories where I can fit a bunch of side characters and make the whole thing sorta absurd. But I also wanted to try to make something quicker, more dialogue-oriented and with shorter scenes. AND YET. I just can't seem to make it work, the writing kinda sucks.

I have some 6k words of this, but can't tell you how much of that is actually usable. And it's maybe 10% of the story. 🙃

▪ Friends that Ruin Your Life (may or may not be the title, undecided) Klaroline, Klefan (!!), affairs, fucked up people, angst

Started in March 2023

The five minutes during which I decided I wanted to go back to my origins and write something angsty and filled with complicated situations, a bit like Gasoline. It features Klaus and Stefan as a couple, and Caroline getting sucked into their messy marriage. So yes, Klaus is having an affair. In his defense, so is Stefan. Caroline's moral compass gets all out of sorts and she realizes the world is a lot less black-and-white than she'd previously assumed and sometimes you do get judged by your one-offs, even if your heart is in the right place.

I got super excited about this one and churned out the entire plan for the whole story, with all the scenes and most of the dialogues and the document alone is like 60k words long. I wrote that in like three days. 🥲 I don't think I could make it a one-shot, and I think that left me bummed because I didn't want it to be a multi-chapter. And then I'm not sure the writing was coming along fine enough, it wasn't flowing, and I started to question whether it was actually good or if I was totally tripping when I had this idea and this was actually insanely shitty. lol Leaning more towards the second right now.

▪ King Arthur AU (not the actual title) Klaroline, magic, fantasy, King Arthur

Started in March 2021

This is very high fantasy, and very intricate. It would be a multi-chapter, but I have no idea how long. I think I was leaning towards 10 chapters. I have four written. And the writing is fairly decent, if I may say so myself. But as it usually happens with me, I get to a point where I start wondering why am I even writing this, and then I stop. 🥲🥲 I also think I was having some doubts about how to wrap it up. It had maybe more plots than I wanted to work with. King Arthur was actually Elijah, and Klaus was Mordred, and Caroline was Guinevere-ish, a witch undercover in "Orleans" (I'm so creative!!).

Only reason this is even on the list is because I recently read the four chapters I have and thought they were pretty decent, but I haven't written anything in almost two years, so maybe I've swiped up on this one already.

▪ The Wolf III and IV 🤡

Started in October 2020 (!! when I tell you guys I've had this written for years lol)

I have technically written The Wolf 3. It's in my "headcanons" format, which is honestly a joke, because clearly I don't know how to write headcanons. 🤡 But as you can see by the starting date, it's very, very old, and it requires full rewriting and lots of editing. Chapters are 15 to 20k words long (some are longer). TW4 is a different story. I never actually wrote it down, all I have is a full, detailed plan of all the scenes and shit. My idea was to not split the two stories into two different fics, but rather continue on with TW4 in the same AO3 "document" (???) as TW3 and make it 34 chapters long instead of 21. It doesn't make a lot of sense, but also I don't have it in me to start another separate story.

But here we are, stuck on S03E17. 🤡 Gonna be honest with you, my dudes, it's been rough to find the motivation to open that document. I think I have half of 17, maybe, but I haven't touched that in over a month. Laely, I have been often sent into thinky thoughts that you really shouldn't have when you're writing fic just for the hell of it, you know. Like, this is in no way meant to be a great piece of writing, I shouldn't be worried about that. It's the fan service of the fan service. But I start to think about the real quality of it and whether it even makes sense to be writing it, I realize I wrote one fic that was good, a second one which I personally think was even better, and then I made the classic mistake of having one too many sequels. This is Jurassic Park III. It's not as crappy as Jurassic World, you have Sam Neill, but should it exist? I just want Klaus and Caroline to be together for a change, and I love adding random final scenes in every chapter where it's just the two of them being married, but - should this be written? Or rather, should this have been posted in the first place? Do we really wanna see them being domestic? Doesn't that kind of kill the vibe? I don't know, man. I don't know. Chapter one was a blast, people seemed so into it and I wrote five chapters at once and got maybe a little over-excited, and then which each update I feel like there's less and less readers and it really gets me thinking. These thoughts are sabotaging my will to write. I need to get back on my fuck it horse.

It will come to me at some point, though. I'm sure it will.

Anyway, these are all my current WIPs! Comments, ideas and positive energies are all welcome! ✨ Let's return to this in december and weep at how little progress I've made 🥲

#yokan writes #WIP list #klaroline fanfiction #i really need to find a beta reader because I feel so sorry for my med student friend #trying to learn how to save lives while I throw 60k words of shit at her 🥲🥲#luiza i'm so sorry

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alpaca-clouds · 9 months

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Remembering Digimon Alpha Generation

(Commission done by mel0dy)

Given it is still Digimon month, I cannot help but be kinda nostalgic about the fandom. Because, again, it was my longest hyperfixation. I had other hyperfixations, yes, but not a single one lasted me as long as Digimon did.

And I just wanna ramble about my Digimon fanseries that I wrote back then.

The year was 2006 when I created a goggle boy named Yuki Denrei for what was originally meant to be an RPG maker fangame, on which I was writing. But the team around that fangame kinda broke apart so by 2008 I was kinda like: "Hey, maybe I gotta make something else with this character." And then: "Hey, doesn't it kinda suck, that Digimon Tamers never got a sequel?"

So I sat down and started writing on my own sequel for Digimon Tamers. It was called Digimon Alpha Generation. The idea at the time came from the fact that we did have the Card Game Alpha (that did not last quite that long) happening at the time. And so I just made the hook that the main characters here were using Digivices to scan the Card Game Alpha Cards, rather than those of the original card game.

Now, my own writing back then was still kinda a mess, but the story went something like this:

The year is 2008, when rebellious teenager Yuki Denrei gets a mysterious invite to a card game fight. The girl who had challenged him is a weird one, though. As they talk she wants to find out which is the card he trusts over all others. And when he is unable to give a proper answer, she summons a Digimon on him. A real Digimon! The only reason Denrei survives this encounter is, that suddenly a card from his deck materializes into Dracomon. Soon enough, Denrei finds out that there are other Digimon Tamers around. Teenagers like him, who have Digimon partners. But again and again that mysterious girl keeps showing up, challenging and the other tamers into fights...

Again, my writing back then was messy as fuck. It took me years to complete the story (that ended up with about 250k words) and I did not have a concrete plan where I was going with it the entire time.

All I knew at the beginning was, that I wanted to have the demon lords as antagonists and wanted to have a more international story happening. Which is why the entire middle arc has the tamers world travelling.

It was an interesting experience as a writer, though.

I knew from the very beginning, that the main trio for this story was gonna be Denrei, a lone wolf character named Shoji, and a now 14yo Shiuchon. Due to Shiuchon having her partner from the very beginning, she is in fact the first one out of this trio reaching the Ultimate level (in the half-way final).

But it was interesting as given I had only rough ideas plotted out, I could kinda react to what the readers at the time were thinking. For example, the peopled fucking adored Shoji (he ended up as the fan favorite character out of all the Digimon Tamers stuff I wrote), so I gave him more scenes. And folks started shipping Denrei and Shiuchon, so I gave the two of them more scenes together and had them end up together in a later story.

I personally loved Denrei, because man I wrote a lot of my parent related anger issues into this character. But I also had so much fun writing Shiuchon in this as a type of character we really never quite got in Digimon. A female, very straight forward character who just says it as it is. And also... is kinda flirty with everyone. xD

At times I still wanna translate the story into English. But then again: 250k - and the sequel story has anther 250k. So a total of 500k - and that is without all the side stories.

And again, it was kinda a mess. So the temptation would be there to rather do a rewrite of Alpha Generation. I don't know. Just thinking.

Might talk about the sequel, too, in the coming days.

(Commission artwork by mel0dy.)

#digimon #digimon tamers #digimon fanseries #digimon fan season #fanseries #digimon tamers sequel #digimon fanfiction #fanfiction #nostalgia

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fanfic-scribbles · 2 years

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Marry Me 2 - Boyfriend’s Back (All Right)

Sequel to: Marry Me

Fandom: MCU Captain America/Avengers

Summary: You’re settling into married life with Steve quite well when his (ex?)boyfriend Bucky starts making his way back into Steve’s life. You wish he’d do it a little faster but that’s all right– you’re more than willing to lend a helping hand. They’ll thank you for this. Someday.

Quick facts: Romance – Steve Rogers/Reader and Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers leading into Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers/Reader – Female Reader

MCU Timeline: Set some nebulous time after CA:TWS

Words: 7118

Warnings: Mention of past kidnapping/harm to the reader-character and also a brief mention of peril at the end because I like a call-back, a lot of fluff, and one vague dirty joke

A/N: Apologies; I really wanted to get this out last month, but then I got stuck, and then I got rolling, and then I got stuck, and then I got rolling again all the way to the end…and then I had to rewrite the ending three times. I couldn’t quite come as full-circle as I wanted, buuuuut I really like this and I hope you will too! I do not know how much sense this will make without having read “Marry Me” first, but give it a whirl if you are so inclined. Part 3 is partly written, but no promises on when that’ll land, as I’ll be working on another story for my next posting, and I am very…very…slow these days. Well, one sentence a day is better than no sentence a day, and that’s all I can say on that. Anyways, please enjoy, and I hope that the rest of the year finds you well (～￣▽￣)～❤

It’s cold and your husband can not take a hint.

“What about this one?”

You take advantage of the opportunity to lean in closer to try and suck up more of Steve’s ambient heat. You can’t really blame him– he’s excited and distracted and you underestimated the weather today and wore the wrong jacket.

Still…did you have to sit outside when the restaurant has so many wonderful seats open inside?

“It looks warm,” you say longingly while looking at the picturesque Greek coastline.

“It does,” Steve says blithely and makes a note on the page.

It is nice to see him so excited about a vacation, so you smile and suck it up. Mind over matter; surely you can tough out a little chill; this is nothing; you are mentally in Santorini or wherever it is Steve wants to go; you are–

–suddenly ensconced by a big, heavy…jacket…that is so soft and warm and smells quite nice, actually, that you sort of snuggle into it before you look around for whoever has surely accidentally draped it across your shoulders. They must have mistaken you for a friend or something, but while you look, so does Steve, and there is…no one else around.

“Did you see…?” you ask Steve but he shakes his head and his brow furrows in concern. He’s out of his excitement and into his danger-seeking mode, and he gestures for the jacket.

“Here, let me check for–” But as he leans in, he stops and…smells.

You raise both eyebrows. That’s new. “Steve?”

He turns pink and jerks back. “Sorry, I just– that was–” But he smiles slowly and says, “It smells like Bucky.”

“Really?” You bring up the collar and inhale. Bucky has very good taste in aftershave, you think, and Steve relaxes into his seat even though he looks like he’s holding back on as much giddiness as you feel, because that means Bucky is back, and hanging around. You grin at Steve. “You know what this means?”

“That his social skills are as atrocious as ever?” Steve says.

You whap at him with the empty sleeve. “If it’s his jacket, that means he has to come back to get it.”

Steve puts his arm around you. “I guess it does.”

“We’ll have to hold off on the vacation.”

Steve shakes his head. “No, we don’t,” he says. “We don’t even know if he’s actually sticking around.”

“But what if he is and we leave him?” you say.

At that he does look a little hesitant– but then he shrugs. “It’s not like we’re leaving him to fend for himself against the Wet Bandits,” he says with a roll of his eyes. “We won’t be gone that long. Also, if Bucky is sticking around, and decides he wants to tag along behind us, I’m pretty sure he knows how to take a flight.”

“Maybe we can get him to come with us.”

“He won’t even let us see him drop by.”

“Not yet,” you say, already thinking ahead. “It’s okay. We just have to be patient.” Steve snorts. You poke him. He may not have much faith, but this is going to be great.

Operation: Get Husband a Boyfriend is a go.

You’re in the park, trying to angle a nice selfie to send to Steve’s request for one, when you feel a presence just off to the side. Your arm twinges a bit– as if your brain isn’t sending enough danger signals on its own, it has to remind you of the one time you ignored it in favor of your (normally very safe) shortcut home– but nearly as soon as you realize someone is there, you realize that someone is Bucky.

“Sorry,” he says.

“It’s okay,” you say and go back to trying to pose while also keeping the camera at a good spot. If you don’t look at him, maybe he won’t be so nervous and he’ll stay? You’ve handled stray cats more high-strung than Bucky; you can do this.

He reaches over and, with a touch so light it’s like he needs to be able to bolt in an instant, shifts the camera into place for maybe the best angle you’ve ever had. “Thanks! You know, I’m only sending it to Steve. Do you wanna–”

“No.”

“Okay,” you say easily, because boundaries are important and it’s honestly nice to know he’s firm about his. You snap the picture and shoot off the text as quick as you can. “Hey, since you’re here, do you wanna–” But as soon as you lift your head you see that he’s gone. You look around, futile though that is, and let out a sigh.

Well, he came around on his own, so this is still a net positive. Baby steps. Steve himself has bemoaned your stubbornness on more than one occasion when it has won out over his. Bucky has no idea who he’s dealing with.

You’re shifting your grocery bags for the fiftieth time in maybe five minutes and wondering if it would somehow behoove you to eat a third of the food you just bought, when there’s a familiar presence at your side. You take a peek and, thankfully, it is in fact Bucky. “Don’t take this the wrong way, since I do like seeing you show up, but I feel like if you’re watching me grocery shop, we’ve got to get you some better hobbies,” you say and wince as one of the bags falls from your elbow to your much-less fortified wrist.

“I’ve got hobbies,” he mutters, almost as if offended.

“Are they purely for fun or do they serve another purpose too?” you ask.

He looks at the bags. “Do you want help or not?”

You hold out a bag, and he slips two of them off your arm, and then snakes another one from your other hand, leaving you with a decidedly lighter load before he takes a few steps forward and looks back at you. You take a few quick steps to catch up– and hook the elbow of your newly freed arm around his. He stiffens and you hesitate, ready to pull back, but he looks at you and inclines his head forward.

Later, all the groceries are laid out on the counter and you’re in the middle of putting them away when you (very calm and casual and not at all incredibly eager) call out, “I know Steve says he wasn’t much of a cook before, but he’s gotten a lot better now and tonight we’re having–”

As soon as you peek your head into the living room you realize you’re all alone. You sigh heavily– and then again, even heavier, when you see Bucky’s coat is now missing from the rack. Slippery bastard. But he showed up in the first place, and you’re not giving up now. You’re just getting started.

The problem with this situation, though, is that you’re still fairly dependent upon Bucky deciding to show up. Which he hasn’t done for over a week now. Walking into traffic just to see if he pops up like a demented guardian angel seems a bit extreme– and also not something you can do more than once or twice, so you’re keeping it well in reserve.

…But it’s tempting.

“Hey,” Steve says as he enters the room. He sounds happy– just shy of delighted. “How did you know I needed a new shaving brush?”

“Uh…” You look at him and have to think back, but Steve’s shaving set-up is not something you touch. Not after you ruined the nice leather thing he used to sharpen his razor and had to grovel for almost a month. Or at least, what felt like a month. No, everything you learned about straight razors and the maintenance thereof was entirely against your will and only stayed in your head for as long as it took for him to forgive you, and you have kept your distance ever since.

“You didn’t replace it,” he says, watching your face and whatever journey it has gone on while wandering off on memory lane. You shake your head and his expression becomes perplexed. “I could have sworn I didn’t– no, I didn’t even get to the store yet, so how…”

You gasp at the same time Steve’s eyes widen. “I can’t believe it,” you say and turn back to the TV in a fit of annoyance. If he’s going to be leaving gifts would it kill him to also leave a little card?

“I’m going to regret asking this since I know what the answer probably is,” Steve says as he leans on the back of the couch next to you, “–but you didn’t give him a key, did you?”

“I didn’t get a chance,” you grumble. And you’re not sure how you’re going to now, when he won’t pop up, but then Steve is rubbing your shoulders and very successfully distracting you from the problem at hand. “Mm, what’s this for?” you ask but lean in.

“I’m sorry,” he says earnestly.

“For what?” you ask, only half-caring.

“For Bucky,” he says, but before you can tell him he shouldn’t apologize for his boyfriend’s bad manners he adds, “You seem pretty upset about him breaking in and I understand, but he–”

“Pffft.” You wave your hand. “I don’t care; it’s Bucky and he probably left the place safer than he found it. No; my problem is that he left you a gift and didn’t also leave a little note or something telling you. That’s not romantic at all!”

Steve stops, snorts, and then lets his head fall against the cushion next to you. “Seriously?”

“Of course! If he’s going to woo you, he needs to put in more of an effort.” You turn your head and give Steve a little kiss on the cheek. “Don’t worry; I’ll teach him everything I know.”

Steve raises an eyebrow. “You’re not seriously going to teach Bucky how to flirt with me, are you?” But just as you open your mouth he stands up. “Sorry; I forgot who I was talking to.”

You pat his hand. The one with the ring. “I’m an expert.”

“Are you also going to teach him how to set someone on fire?”

“First: it wasn’t my fault, the waiter bumped into me; second: nothing should have exploded like that so I’m pretty sure whatever she was using in her hair has been illegal since the eighties; third: she was fine; fourth: Bucky probably knows much better ways of setting fires and explosions,” you say. “Oh…”

Steve sighs heavily and starts walking out of the room. “I need to find out if I can get a restraining order on behalf of another person just to keep you two away from each other.”

You lean back and watch him go. “But would you get it to protect me from Bucky, or to protect Bucky from me?”

“Yes.”

It has taken you way longer than it should have to position this one stupid picture frame when you realize you’ve left the hammer just out of reach. For a moment you consider the merits of driving the nail you’re holding into the wall with your own skull, for the arrogance of trying to do this without a pencil if nothing else, when someone walks casually up behind you. In your securely locked and very safe home.

“Think you forgot something,” Bucky says and slides the hammer over your shoulder so you can grab it.

“You are my hero,” you say and reposition yourself so you can finally drive this stupid nail into the stupid wall. Once that’s done you take a moment– if you turn too fast, will he bolt? …If you don’t turn, will he think he’s unwanted, and bolt? You sigh, and decide to take a chance. “You know, when you get someone a gift, a little card with a sweet message would not go amiss,” you say, turn, and to your (pleased) surprise he’s actually still there.

He rolls his eyes. “Do they have greeting cards that say ‘hey honey, back from the dead?’” he asks.

“Hm…” Probably not, but considering what there are cards for, you hesitate to commit. “If we can’t find one, I can at least get a blank card with a cute picture and we can make our own.” You put your hand on your chest. “I can definitely give you some pointers on romantic messages.”

He stares at you, inscrutable. “You married him.”

“I did!” you say proudly. “I married him knowing he loves me, and knowing he’s always going to love you.” You stare right back at him. “This isn’t a fight, and nobly sacrificing yourself isn’t going to do anything good for either of you. For any of us. That’s not atonement, that’s martyrdom, and don’t you think you and Steve have been through enough without enduring pain just for pain’s sake?”

He looks down, shifts his weight, but though you tense, he doesn’t run. He stays. But it’s so quiet, and he looks so scared, so you clear your throat. “We’re having take-out tonight from an Italian place we love,” you say. “Do you want to stay for dinner?”

He doesn’t move, at first, doesn’t say anything, but then he settles on his back foot and says, quietly, “I like Italian.”

To his credit, he only looks like he regrets it a little when you punch your fist in the air.

It’s dark and you really shouldn’t be walking alone in this area but there is something to be said for taking your life back after a traumatic experience. Or so you will say, when Steve inevitably gets mad at you for being out and alone like this.

Truth be told, you’re not so fond of it either– if you could go back in time you’d pick a nice bright coffee shop to sit at while you text Steve to come meet you, or just suck it up and pay for a cab. But no, an interminable subway delay led to ‘doing something different,’ and ‘it isn’t that far,’ and ‘can’t be a nervous wreck forever,’ and now you’re gripping your phone like it’s more of a literal lifeline than just a glorified map.

A car comes up on your side and slows. You cross your arms and hold your phone closer to your body. Great; just what today needed.

“Hey baby–”

Another body comes between you and the car– a very bulky one, and an arm slides gently over your shoulders as Bucky grunts, the men spit out rude epithets, and the car speeds off. You take a deep breath and he tightens his hold on you. “What the hell are you doing over here?” he asks, apparently having taken the same lessons on how to lecture that Steve has. Actually, Steve probably got it from him, now that you think about it.

“Taking a detour,” you say and stand straighter. “The subway was way delayed.”

“They run out of cabs when I wasn’t looking?”

You look away. “It’s not that far.”

“It’s safer.”

“Yeah, well, I can’t be a scaredy-cat forever now can I?” you say a little sharper than you mean to. You take a few moments, and you sigh. “Though I guess that’s not true, since I am.”

“There’s nothing wrong with being cautious,” Bucky says, and squeezes you gently. “Taking risks and bein’ reckless ain't exactly sticking it to them.”

Given some of the…explosive methods Bucky has used in taking out Hydra bases, you hope he can feel the way you stare at him.

Feel, no, but otherwise sense, yes, apparently. “Shut up,” he mutters and shoots you a side-glare.

“I didn’t say anything,” you say and lift your nose.

“Don’t hav’ta,” he huffs and pokes your side, making you laugh reflexively and you hit his stomach. Which feels about as solid as his arm, so at least you don’t smack it hard. He gives a little half-smile, and nods ahead at your home coming into sight. “I know what I’m doing.”

Steve comes to the door to meet you and is, predictably, unamused by how late you are, even with your very handy escort, but it all gets smoothed over, because you are an expert in handling Steve Rogers by now.

“Do you want to stay the night?” Steve asks Bucky, very casually, and you try to mimic his attitude by being very normal (really) and pretending like you haven’t been waiting forever (a few weeks) for an opening like this.

Bucky stares at you, though, enough that confusion helps you calm down enough to ask, “What?”

He fights a losing battle against a small smile. “Just wondering how long it’ll take you to vibrate into the stratosphere from pretending to keep your cool.”

Your jaw drops and Steve (the traitor) laughs. On one hand, that was pretty good. On the other hand…you can’t just let him win.

“Sorry Bucky; as much as I appreciate and respect you as Steve’s boyfriend, seeing me vibrate into the stratosphere is a relationship milestone you have to apply for after a substantial amount of groundwork.” You grin. “Just ask Steve.”

Steve chokes and Bucky turns red, and for a moment you fear you might have actually scared him off, but he slumps. “Good luck,” he mutters to Steve before going inside and Steve, still a traitor, rubs his face and nods, and then all but drags you in.

Bucky leaves in the morning before you wake (of course), but while the bed is made to look as pristine as if no one was ever there, you know for a fact that Bucky stayed, and for no real reason other than it was offered. You’ll take it.

Over the next few weeks Bucky pops in and out as he pleases. Sometimes he lets himself be seen, but rarely, even though he always makes his presence known. Mostly by Steve, who mentions hearing the guest room window pop open, or having heard someone putter around the kitchen. You find traces of him by the replenished food stores– you can barely tell he drank any juice but he still gets a whole new carton to make up for the half-cup he must have taken– and the way the house gets mysteriously cleaner overnight. Typically, the kitchen and the spare bathroom get a wipe down, but the guest bedroom is always way nicer than you left it.

It’s starting to drive you a little insane.

You leave a note on the fridge telling him not to replace anything, you’re going shopping later and it’s fine, only for him to predict half your shopping list and put it where you can see it. You hide the cleaning products only to walk in to a kitchen counter fresh enough to perform surgery on. His hospital corners somehow get even tighter when you start going into the guest bedroom at night, pulling at the blankets and setting the pillows just slightly askew. Not enough to make a mess, but enough to make it…human.

He's acting like he has to make up for his very existence and, though there’s probably a lot of psychological heartbreak in that, you know he’s also doing it to tweak you at this point.

He’s doing too damn good a job at it.

One night you’re replacing one of the pillows slightly left of center when someone loudly clears their throat behind you and you jump guiltily to find Steve, arms crossed and leaning against the doorway with a look that would be stern if he wasn’t also slightly smiling.

“You know, it might be old-fashioned…” he says and drops the act as he walks into the room to stand in front of you. “But I thought a host was supposed to make a room nicer for a guest.”

You huff and cross your arms. “Some people get guests that aren’t constantly antagonizing them.”

“By doing shopping and cleaning up whatever mess he’s made?” Steve asks. “Other people would kill for a guest so considerate.”

“Yeah well maybe they don’t care about their guests enough, but I know what he’s doing and why,” you say, starting to get a little heated, but this has been coming for a while, and if Bucky won’t show his face to get it, Steve can damn well pass it along. “He’s being too considerate; he’s acting like his entire existence is a stain and it’s driving me up a wall!”

Steve jerks back but your frown is deep-set and you tighten the fold of your arms. “Like you said, he’s a guest, which means we take care of him,” you say. “If he doesn’t want that then he can be a-a resident; a member of the house– if he wants to be– but either way he’s walking on eggshells right now, like he owes us something, and I swear to God if he starts leaving rent money I am getting Natasha involved to track him down so I can deck him. He’s not a fucking Brownie and I don’t know how else to make him stop acting like his presence is an inconvenience when it’s not!”

“Hey, easy,” Steve says softly and gently takes you in his arms. It’s nice. He does give really good hugs, and against your will some of the anger fades. “This really bothers you, doesn’t it?”

You let your head flop against his chest. “I could be a good host if he’d fucking let me.”

Steve rubs your back and lets you cool off a little bit more. After a few moments he says, “And a good host short-sheets the guest bed?”

You push yourself further into him and grumble. “At this point he deserves it.”

Later that night you wake to some noise and shuffling– and open your eyes to the delightful sight of Bucky, sour-faced, wearing a soft shirt and sweatpants, crawling into bed on Steve’s other side as Steve holds up the blanket. When Bucky sees you awake his scowl deepens. “Fuck you,” he says, and though Steve is facing away, you see him shake with laughter.

“Good night jerk-face,” you say and snuggle back into the best sleep of your life.

After that Bucky no longer takes great pains to sneak in and out. He goes back to the guest bed (that he makes you painstakingly remake under his very watchful eye) and spends his days doing…something you’re probably better off not asking about. But he takes the key you had made for him and uses the door. He sticks around for movie night and shares in the popcorn you offer. He drinks a soda without immediately buying a replacement case, but comes grocery shopping when you ask for a little extra muscle. He writes insulting messages on the whiteboard for Steve that make your husband roll his eyes and pout at you in betrayal when you laugh. He keeps his room tidy but starts to leave little things behind. He forgets his jacket on the back of the couch. At the end of the day, he comes home.

The more Bucky settles in, the less you have to worry about him. Which is, of course, a good thing– however, it means you have more mental energy to devote to your own crap. Which is…not ideal. You’d swear you had been doing better after that whole ‘kidnapping’ thing, but now the nights seem to get darker, the side streets emptier, and nearly every person looks suspicious. It’s stupid. And you don’t want to tell Steve– it took forever to get him to stop hovering and you don’t want to make him anxious for no reason too, but you’re starting to get paranoid. It feels like someone’s watching you– not all the time, but often enough that constant vigilance is starting to wear.

Like now. You’ve had such a rough day you decided to treat yourself to a well-made drink at a nearby coffee shop. Steve is still working and though Bucky hadn’t wanted anything when you’d asked, he had offered to walk with you. You had declined– it was so close to home and you were going to come right back– and so you had left him tap-tapping away on his laptop in the living room.

Now though…

It’s really, really stupid. It’s not even night; the sun is right in the midst of setting, and you’re in the middle of a bustling coffee shop, getting ready to walk down a city sidewalk that is far from barren, back home where the world’s most dangerous (former) assassin sits waiting, and you…

You feel so unsettled you can’t even make yourself step just outside.

After a few minutes of awkward shuffling to get out of the way of other people coming and going while pretending to text, you concede defeat and actually send a message to Bucky that reads, ‘Do you want to take a little walk still?’

Not even five seconds later you receive a response: ‘Are you safe?’

‘Yes,’ you reply immediately and sigh. You know Bucky well enough by now to know that as soon as he got the text he shut his laptop and started getting ready to head out. That’s a guy who doesn’t do take-backs. ‘I’m just being stupid.’

‘You got a long way to go to catch up to Steve. ETA 10 min’

‘15 if this damn tourist doesn’t MOVE’

You smile at the follow-up and look around. You don’t want to commandeer a table for the short time you’ll be here, but standing by the door is weird. You wander back over to the display case and pretend to very seriously consider baked goods you just don’t have a taste for right now.

It doesn’t feel like ten minutes have gone by when a hand settles on your shoulder, and that’s why you jump. Or so you’ll say if anybody asks, but Bucky studies you like he’s just looking for confirmation for an answer he already has, and then he lifts his head and glances around.

“Are you sure you don’t want anything?” you ask.

“Nah; don’t wanna spoil my appetite,” he says and throws his arm around your shoulders. “You’re getting extra potstickers tonight, right?”

At the mere mention you scowl. “I’d love to ruin your appetite,” you say even as he leads you out of the shop. “Especially if it means you stop stealing my food.”

“It’s called ‘sharing.’”

“Sharing implies asking, and being granted permission.” But you stay close to him as you walk home. “We’re getting extra extra potstickers.”

“Sounds like permission to me,” he says and squeezes you a little closer. Though he can’t protect you from everything– something you learned the hard way– you feel safe right now, and that’s enough.

The feeling lasts well into the remainder of the night, as you and Steve settle into bed. He curls his arm around you and dims the lights, and you snuggle closer into his chest. The doors and windows have all been checked, as Steve, and now Bucky, are wont to do, and you are as safe as anyone can be.

“I’m sorry I’ve been busy lately,” Steve says softly and runs his hand up and down your back in soft, slow strokes.

“I know. I go through all this trouble to get you a boyfriend and you hardly see him,” you say and turn your smile up at him, just in case.

He smiles back. “To say nothing of my wife,” he says with an added little huff, though his tone is light, and he kisses your forehead. “At least my boyfriend goes running with me in the mornings.”

“He does?” There is not an expression sad enough even for Captain America to make to get you up before the sun just to try to keep pace with a supersoldier. Even Sam has long since lost patience with him, and only joins when he can deal with Steve’s nonsense. “Oh. I’m glad you have a regular jogging buddy again.”

“Yeah. I do.” He goes quiet, but he remains looking at you. “I’ll be home sooner this week. We can go back to planning our vacation.”

“That’ll be nice.”

“Mm hm.”

He stares for a few moments and it slowly dawns on you as to why. You sigh. “Bucky’s a snitch,” you grumble and flop face-first into the pillow.

“A real double-crosser,” Steve agrees lightly and continues stroking your back. Well…it does feel nice, so you fold your arms under your head and look at him again. “You feeling all right, sweetheart?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” you say. At his raised eyebrows you flop your face back into your arms. You peek, though, and Steve has changed to a gentle expression that breaks your heart.

“A strategist through and through,” you huff and turn your head back to the side. He chuckles and you try to relax. “I’m…better, I think; I’ve just been a little off lately.”

“If you’ve noticed anything–”

“I haven’t,” you say. “I’m just being paranoid. Honest.”

He studies you for a few moments more, as though he can see whether or not you’re telling the truth. Foolish, considering you once hid a mountainous chocolate cake practically right under his very nose, but you let him have a few moments to determine your sincerity until he comes down on the right side and settles in. He shuts his eyes and you follow suit.

“I won’t let anyone hurt you ever again,” he says, his arm laying across you. “And neither will our boyfriend.”

You’re just about to drift off when you catch his wording and you crack open your eye. “Your boyfriend.”

“Mm hm,” he says, already well on his way to sleep. You smile to yourself and follow. You can needle him about his slip of the tongue later.

It has been another long day, but when you come home at the end of it, Steve is home, and making dinner with Bucky in the kitchen. They don’t acknowledge you at first, too caught up in a conversation obviously well-established, and you take a moment to watch Steve shoulder-check Bucky and get cursed out before he turns his head to you, smiling and laughing. He brightens even more when he sees you, though he then takes in all of you. “Hey sweetheart,” he says warmly. “Rough day?”

You don’t respond with words, instead going up to him and flopping your forehead right onto his shoulder. He shifts to circle an arm around you, and brings you in between him and Bucky.

Bucky lifts a spoon filled with steaming sauce up to your face. “Try this,” he says.

You blow a bit and then have a taste. “Mm,” you say. “Just a little more salt?”

“Told you,” Bucky says and Steve moves as if to hip-check him, before remembering you are in between. Steve ducks sheepishly and you roll your eyes before you hip-check him.

“That’s my cue to get out of here,” you say and step back, giving Steve a little kiss on the cheek before you go. Instinctively you turn towards Bucky and– stop, because you can’t kiss him, he’s not your boyfriend, he’s Steve’s boyfriend, that would be weird, but oh no, now he’s staring at you, and Steve is staring at you (and smirking, like he knows how you almost slipped,) and it’s getting a little awkward so you do the only thing you can think of.

You kiss two fingers and press them to Bucky’s cheek.

Steve snorts, and Bucky looks bewildered. He then looks so offended that you ask, “What?”

“I don’t have fucking cooties,” he says, sounding a bit sour, and turns back to the pot.

You smirk, and then start drawing on his flesh arm. “Circle, circle–” You lose all pretense of gentility and jab his arm a couple of times, which makes him jump and swear which you ignore to finish, “–dot, dot, now you’ve had your cooties sh– ack!”

Bucky has you in a gentle headlock and Steve, your husband, love of your life, apple of your eye, supposedly devoted, there through sickness and health, or so he has lied, does absolutely nothing to help you. “If you two are going to roughhouse, can you do it away from dinner?” he says.

You and Bucky stop and share a look.

Soon Steve is rubbing his arm and muttering under his breath and giving the both of you dirty looks as Bucky goes back to calmly stirring the sauce. You smile sweetly and give your husband a kiss that seems to mollify him a little– and then, you figure, what the hell, and you give Bucky an exaggerated kiss to the back of his head. “Mwah!”

“Inoculation working great, doc,” he says without turning around. “I don’t feel even a little queasy.”

You roll your eyes over to Steve. “I’m going to murder your boyfriend.”

Steve snorts and then, in unison, they both say, “Good luck.”

You mutter and retreat to the bedroom to change into more comfortable clothes. And call Natasha to see if she can help make you a widow.

“What do you think of this one, Bucky?”

“I think it’s your vacation,” he says and continues to read his book.

You’re laying across the couch and, by association, Steve and Bucky, who sit on it properly– poor suckers they are. Your legs are draped across Steve’s lap and your head is on Bucky’s thigh, and though you can’t read whatever language the spine of his book is in, you’re pretty sure it’s boring and not as nice as the pretty pictures you’re perusing on your tablet.

You poke the book just above your face. He somehow keeps it completely still so you poke it harder, and he retaliates by bopping your nose with it. “Ow,” you say mostly on reflex. Steve chuckles and pats your feet but otherwise keeps reading his boring reports. He’d humor you if you asked, but in all honesty you’ve made your decision already, and it’s more fun to bother Bucky.

“Come on,” you say. Maybe you whine. Just a little. “When’s the last time you sat on a beach for hours doing nothing?”

The way he goes still make you think he’s thinking– and you suddenly realize, yeah, assassin who was an exceptional sniper even before the bad guys got their hands on him, that’s probably not something you want him to delve too deep into, so you quickly amend, “When’s the last time you laid on a beach for a vacation?”

He moves his book just so he can give you an incredulous look. You grin and move your tablet in front of your face, image-side up. “So you’re overdue!” you say proudly.

He, somehow, bops you with your own tablet. “Ow.”

You lay the tablet on your lap and rub your nose, and you’re back to staring at the spine of his book. However, he says, “I’m not crashing your vacation.”

You roll your eyes. “You followed us close enough to give me your jacket when I was cold. You really expect me to believe you weren’t planning on following us?”

Unfortunately, you are not fast enough to put your hand up before he gets you again. Next time you’ll forgo the leg rub and keep your head closer to Steve; you’re pretty sure he’s smart enough not to provoke you.

“I don’t know if you need protection from Bucky or protection from yourself.”

Then again, maybe not.

Bucky slots into your life with Steve even better than you had hoped. He’s handy around the house, considerate, and always fun to bug when you need some quick entertainment. It’s really quite…nice. You had worried about the potential awkwardness– a lot, actually; more than either Steve or Bucky would likely ever give you credit for. However, the only uncomfortable moments come when Bucky is trying to be too polite (in your ever un-humble opinion) and you’ve found you can easily diffuse said moments by being very rude, which has the intended effect of making Bucky more comfortable around you, and the unintended-but-still-pleasurable side-effect of making Steve very red. Every time.

Bucky even eventually gets used to you throwing an arm around him, or giving him a hug, to the point where he starts to relax, and lean in, and one day, miracle of miracles, even reflexively puts an arm around you in return. He’s busy (because the best hugs are given randomly) but he squeezes you, rubs your shoulder, and lets his arm drop, but he’s only handling the TV remote and so it just kind of curls partly behind you on the sofa. You smile proudly at Steve to find him already watching the both of you with undeniable love in his eyes. It’s…nice. It’s nice how happy Steve is, and how well you get on with Bucky, to the point where you’re happy to see him and sit with him and spend time with both him and Steve. It’s nice. You should be friends with your husband’s boyfriend. This is totally appropriate. This is completely fine.

What’s not completely fine, is that you weren’t just paranoid. Somebody has been watching you, and now you’re in a derelict factory, on the run from a maniac who wants to hurt Steve by proxy, which is gross and offensive and if you weren’t so tragically allergic to pain you’d take this large plank of wood you’re holding and go give him a good whack with it. You almost had when the guy had actually done a little sing-song “Come out, come out, wherever you are.” There’s a level of pathetic you’ll allow in your kidnapping/murder attempts and you have far, far surpassed it.

You sigh heavily. Kidnapping/murder attempts. Plural. Seriously, what is your life.

A body suddenly comes from around a corner and you shriek and bring up the flimsy piece of wood to bring it down as hard as you possibly can. The man holds up his arm defensively and the fucking thing breaks the goddamn cheap piece of–

Wait. Arm.

“Bucky!” you gasp, toss the broken piece of wood down, and leap onto him to cling like a koala.

“Are you hurt?” he asks, holding you easily even as he feels you over for injuries, and then immediately wraps both his arms around you. “That was a good swing, doll.”

“You have no idea how glad I am to see you,” you say into his chest. Your heart starts to return to normal. You can breathe. Steve isn’t here, and you do desperately want to see him, but seeing Bucky is good too.

“I think I can imagine,” Bucky says and doesn’t let go even as you set your feet down and loosen your grip to give him a chance. You pull your face back to look at him and…oh dear; you suddenly feel very, very grateful. His hair is a little windswept, and he’s looking at you just as intensely, and you wonder if maybe, possibly, perhaps, you need to have a conversation with Steve about how sharing is caring. As Bucky puts his hand on your cheek and presses his forehead to yours, but does not move to do anything else, you…

“Bucky?” you say, nearly breathless and very, very much restraining yourself.

“Yeah Doll?” he says, sounding just as hard-pressed as you not to move forward.

“We…” You lick your lips and his eyes immediately flick down and damn it, when they flick back up there’s an intensity there that nearly makes you weak in the knees. “We should talk to Steve.”

He swallows and your eyes flick down to his throat before you make eye contact again. He opens his mouth.

“Steve is going to be damned glad to see the two of you stop dancing around each other.”

You gasp and try to jerk away but Bucky reacts by hugging you tight with one arm while the other brings up his gun and the two of you look to a walkway just a level up to see–

“Steve!” you breathe in relief, happy to see him safe.

He grins, and before you can remind him for the umpteenth time to stop testing the limits of his poor knees, he grips the railing with one hand and leaps down. Bucky exhales heavily and slips his gun back into place, letting you go for Steve to come over and check that you’re all right for himself.

“Wait,” you say and pull back from him. He looks like the cat that got the cream, looking between you and Bucky. “You’re smug.”

“I am,” he says and flashes you a little grin. “You two finally got a goddamn clue. So can you just kiss already?”

“You knew?” you– and Bucky– say in unison.

Steve rolls his eyes like the know-it-all little shit he is (seriously, you love him, but some of his past ass-kickings must have been deserved), but his gaze softens when he looks at you again. “Yeah, I knew. Serum gave me perfect vision, you know,” he says. “And it’s plain common-sense. Knew it was only a matter of time before the two most charming people in my life charmed the socks off each other too.”

You roll your eyes and look at Bucky, but instead of shared exasperation, you find his gaze very firmly settled on you. You don’t know what to do at first, but you smile and eventually say, “Your boyfriend’s a pain in the ass.”

“Been that way for a century now,” Bucky says, cracking a smile and sliding an arm behind you. You take a step, and he slowly pulls you in. “It’s good to have backup for a punk like him.”

“Mm hm,” you say, because there’s nothing else to say, and you and Bucky continue your slow trajectory into each other, until your lips finally meet, and it feels natural and good and right to kiss your husband’s boyfriend. And…yours now too.

You get about ten seconds of peace before said husband ruins the mood. “Finally. I can’t believe it took you two so long though do you know how many times I’ve wanted to take both your heads and just knock them toge–”

Bucky yanks him in by the shirt collar and Steve reflexively steadies himself with one hand on Bucky’s shoulder and the other hand on yours. A three-way kiss is as awkward as you would have assumed, but that’s all right. You have plenty of time to figure it out.

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x bucky barnes x reader #captain america reader insert #avengers reader insert #mcu reader insert #established steve x reader #developing bucky x reader x steve

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modkatisbacc · 4 months

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Planned Stories for 2024!

Might as well Try this whole... Schedule thing out for a New Year's Resolution. Below are stories that I am working on/will be working on in the coming year, that will stop being on hiatus and will be updated by me. Or else.

World of Warcraft:

PSTD: My Oc's World of Warcraft story that takes place on an Alternate Azeroth! Canon is OUT the window, and everyone ends up traumatized because of it.

Come Together: The sequel to PSTD, will probably not be a thing until much later next year, since I'm only on chapter 3 of PSTD (Which I'm soft rewriting, I like whatever I did last time for once.)

Death And All His Friends (Viva La Vida): Eventual Fairshaw fic in which both Flynn and Taelia are turned into Death Knights following a tragedy at sea.

After All This Time, It's Still You: Katiann thinks back on the last ten years. (Half completed, two chapters whole moly my second completed fic soon??) Katiann's first sidestory.

Gen:lock:

Time Stands In A Duel (And I Stand For You) *TSIAD for short* My only GL Story currently. I haven't looked at it since I made it and I thought it was horrible, but I got a comment saying they were wondering when I was going to write the next chapter, sooo ITS BACK BABY. Eventually.

The GL Time-Travel fic. Will the gang make things better, or worse? *Not compliant with Season 2*

Ninjago:

The Only Ones: An unpublished fic in progress where Lloyd and Pixal time travel back to the events of season three. We need more Lloyd and Pixal friendship.

An Unlikely Team: The RWBY/Ninjago Crossover. Long before time had a name, Ninjago was besieged by the forces of darkness, creatures of Grimm.

Legend state that the great and powerful Oni had left them behind as a warning that they would truly never be gone from the realm, and have spawned indefinitely for milliennia. In the present, teenagers all over Ninjago are taught how to fight this force of darkness, if they choose to do so.

These monsters go after anyone that are left unguarded, from villages, to towns with no defense. It is now up to the chosen Huntsmen and Huntresses of the next generation to continue this line- or end it once and for all.

HomeScapes: Since I am a horrible human being, I stayed up until past 7 am last night and could not stop thinking about Homescapes. Just a bunch of cute stuff with horror undertones bc It’d be funny if the player character was just the shadowy figure that loomed over everyone and just wanted to help fix stuff, with no one scared or even surprised about you.

To See You Again: Katherine Broom was excited that her childhood best friend (and crush) Austin had returned to town. When she learned that he was trying to restore his childhood home, she dropped everything to help him, even her training to become a protector of nature.

“It’s like you have magic!”

“It’s… not magic… Austin. I’ve just worked with nature and plants all of my life is all.”

It was definitely magic, and you grit your teeth and smile hoping that he doesn’t think anything is up.

You glance at the shadow person that towers over the two of you. They give you a thumbs up.

(Did I add horror elements via the player character? Yeah don’t worry about it)

Original Stories:

WTF, ModKat! Series: A series of strange dreams and or nightmares made into stories.

Let Her Into Your Heart: Your name is Jude, you are twenty-five years old, and every five years on your birthday you run away. From everything. You were on your way to celebrate your birthday when you jumped out of your dad’s car and are now on the run.. but what are you running from?

Subway Killer: You are world renowned investigator, and your biggest case leads you to an abandoned subway tunnel… where you find that the suspect for several murders has been hiding.

#THAT IS IT #For Now #Technically don't have a RWBY story #Outside of that crossover #Ninjago #gen:lock #genlock #warcraft #world of warcraft #There you guys go :)

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destinyc1020 · 1 year

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My Movie Review: "Black Panther: Wakanda Forever"

I saw “Black Panther: Wakanda Forever” this past weekend! I just wanted to share my own personal Movie Review, and maybe we can discuss it (Spoiler-Free).

**NOTE: I will first start off by giving a very general overview/review of the movie overall, and then further down below in the “keep reading” section, I will discuss the pros and cons from the movie, and will go more in-depth and be more candid with how I felt about the movie, but IT WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS, so I just want to make sure everyone is aware of that. So, if you DON’T want any spoilers, DO NOT click the section to “read more”.

With that said….

OVERALL:

Overall, this movie is definitely one to check out and see on the big screen. It is visually spectacular, the music is great, and the story definitely held my attention. I LOVED how this movie dealt with grief and the up and down rollercoaster of emotions that someone can experience when they’ve lost someone that they love dearly to death. ☹ The film was VERY moving, and I found myself shedding a tear in a couple of parts during the movie, and not too many films did that for me this year.

This was a visually spectacular film. The costumes were AMAZIINNNG!!!!!!😍 OMG they definitely deserve an Oscar nod just for the costume designs ALONE lol. 👏🏾 Oh and the ACTING! Chiiiiilllle….the acting in this film was SUPERB! Miss Angela Basset did her thing y’all! Letitia had some pretty decent scenes as well. I see some ladies are already LOVING the villain in the film, Namor lol. He wasn’t bad-looking imo. He’s already got some fans I see hahaha. 🤣

I felt like the film did a very nice tribute to Chadwick, and I found myself getting sad during certain parts remembering his passing. You can definitely tell that they have to rewrite the script almost completely and change the plot direction of the film due to their lead actor’s unexpected passing away, and so I will try not to be TOO overly judgmental in my more in-depth review of the “pros” and “cons” down below. I liked how they also kept some humor in the film though, so it wasn’t all just crying and pain.

I’m definitely going to have to watch this movie again soon in order to get some more of the subtle messages in the film as well as to appreciate it more.

MY OVERALL SCORE: 7.5/10 (I know I’ll probably get pelted with tomatoes for saying this buttttt….. Honestly? I felt the first “Black Panther” movie was MUCH better. Sequels are tough sometimes because there’s that huge pressure and expectation to be better than the first movie.🥴)

**HINT: Make sure to stay to the mid-credt scenes after the movie has ended! You definitely don’t want to miss that lol. There isn’t a second after credit scene, so you don’t have to sit there until all the credits are over lol.

Now on to my more CANDID review (WITH SPOILERS) below…

⚠️⚠️DO NOT READ if you DON’T want any SPOILERS!

I’m warning you lol…

Turn back now lol….Last chance….😄

PROS:

I LOVED seeing “Black Excellence” onscreen. Omg the women were so beautiful! It’s so rare that we see DARKER-skinned black women featured in mainstream films with POSITIVE representation, so it’s just always refreshing to see that in this franchise. 😊

I LOVED how they introduced Iron Heart into the franchise. Riri!

I LOVED the wonderful little tributes to Chadwick in the film, especially the beginning part with the Marvel “Intro”. I was so touched that they did that for him. *sob*😭😭

I loved the humor in the film… Some parts made me laugh literally out loud lol.

I liked how they kept the subtle political messages throughout in the film just like they had in the first film. Some of the elements were pretty deep.

I LOVEEEDD seeing my boo Michael B. Jordan back onscreen again!😍😍 I had a feeling they were going to add him in the movie as a cameo in SOME way, so it was nice seeing him onscreen again. I STILL think they killed him off too soon in the first movie imo.

CONS:

I think my MAIN “con” with this film was that I almost felt like it didn’t really focus on the Wakandans as much as I would have liked. While I’m glad that they gave the villain Namor a back-story, and explained his reason for why he felt the way he did, I almost felt like they spent just a TAD bit too much time on the blue underwater creatures too soon/early in the film, and all throughout. Idk… maybe it’s just me.

I felt like the film was missing the same “Magic” that the first film had, but I think that had more to do with the fact that the film didn’t really seem to focus on “US” (black people) as much as the first film did. I don’t think it had much to do with Chadwick’s passing as it had more to do with where the focus was in the film. At one point I was like, “Are we watching Black Panther? Or Aquaman??” ROTFL

I didn’t like how the film made the Wakandans look weak and helpless in so many scenes. Granted, you don’t want a perfect character or country because that’s just as equally annoying at times. But I felt that there were so many instances that the Wakandans were made to look weak, and I think that part of the reason why the first movie worked so well was that it FINALLY showed black people (Africans) in a state of POWER, and not weakness. Idk…just a minor gripe.

My other MAIN gripe was that they KILLED Queen Ramonda!!! I was like, NOOOO!!!! ☹ They did NOT have to kill our Queen like that! Smh! I was really mad at that decision tbh. I know they wanted Shuri to have a really HUGE reason to harvest her rage, but they did NOT have to do it like that!

RANDOM THOUGHTS

Lawwwddd….why did I get the feeling that M’Baku was gonna propose marriage to Shuri in the forest?? ROTFL! I was like: “Whaaaaaaa???”

Omg was I the ONLY one who literally GASPED in the theater when Nakia brought out T’Challa Jr.?? LOL! I literally sat up in my seat and yelled out: “NO WAAAAY!!!!”

Did anyone else get the feeling that Namor was kinda feeling Shuri? But then again, I kinda got the feeling that Riri had a crush on Shuri too lol 🤣

What was up with all of the bald-headed/ashy jokes towards Okoye?? I don’t know if I liked that too much.

Omg the little actor boy they chose to be Nakia and T'Challa's son was sooo cuuute!! 😊 He looked like he could have really been their child! Lol

#My Movie Review #Black Panther Wakanda Forever

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trashquisitor-shirozora · 10 months

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16, 30, and 75??

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

Okay, so I have the final chapter of Gravity Well vibrating in my head and the entire rest of The Stars screaming at me to fucking get on with it already, but I also have a Mummy AU that I talked about before, and then a very little mostly visual idea I chatted about with one of my mutuals where Anakin is MENA and Padme is Mongolian. In a more interesting timeline....

There's also a little seed of an idea for a one-shot sequel to Sweater Weather where Din and Grogu meets Luke's family and that would end with Din half-joking about taking Luke to Mandalore, but I don't know if anything will come of that. Guess we'll see when actual sweater weather swings around my neck of the woods again.

30. Do you share rough drafts or do you wait until it’s all polished?

I used to post WIPs and they weren't all that edited either, but I had a few formative experiences that made me go the "don't post until polished" route. One was readers at FFN getting fuck-off angry that I took down a Transformers WIP because I was going to rewrite and polish the story. I never posted it back up. I'm so mad I didn't because now the only copies I have left of that fic are oooooooooold word docs and text files, and they're incomplete. Another was just... the sheer number of abandoned WIPs because I didn't plot well and wrote myself into walls. It was really discouraging and I got used to expecting myself to fail whenever I started a longfic. Then I really got into the habit of participating in NaNo every year, and the NaNo method of writing balls to the wall, like you're running out of time, until you hit the end of Nov. 30th. really changed the game for me. Like, oh, I should just writewritewrite until I reach the end, and now I have all this time to go back and see what I can cut out, what I can add, what I can do to put out a finished product.

I think the finest exampe and experience I had with that method was The Storm. It was originally a lot shorter because I was in such a hurry to finish this story that wouldn't leave my ass alone and I really wanted to get the fic out there while the dinluke ship and fandom were starting to take off, but when I was going over what I wrote, I realized that the story was missing time and I needed to create more time for these characters to sit in their heads, listening to the rain and to each other, and to get to know each other better. So I wrote in enough scenes to add a new chapter and create a story with a much better tempo and pace, and that story gave me a massive fic series for the ship. What the fuck.

75. What scene in [Fanfic Name] took the longest to write? What was difficult about it?

Umm.... not sure which fic we're talking about here. But like, just assume that either all the scenes in the chapter after the story's climax or all the scenes in the last chapter of a story take the longest to write. They always do. Coming down from the high of a story's climax (lol) or tying up every loose thread that needs tying up to finish a story is just insanely hard to do. I'm trying to wrap up Gravity Well right now AND I AM STRUGGLING. I've also been working tons of overtime while living in an environment where I can't ever relax, so it's a struggle and a fight to write everything down and feel satisfied.

Play ask games, win ask prizes!

#shirozora awkwardly responds to asks #shirozora is also an extremely wordy bitch tonight #which is good because I need to write some fic right now

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aurora-313 · 1 year

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I got interested at Bleach again recently, and sadly, some of my favorite characters in Bleach is very minor characters, include Kaien and Masaki. I came across your fic just about a week ago, and thank you for the great works. I think I read each and every one of your fic at least four times last week. I never knew I needed some good Ichigo-Kaien cousins relationship, and your works scratched an itch I never knew I had.

So, how long do you planned to write your works? Most Bleach fic writers hate lost agent arc (I dont like it either, but the concept of fullbring is good. I just hate Ichigo's final fullbring design), and you jokingly said something about BB!Kaien flirting some of the female quincies on other asks. Nepenthe starts even before turn back the pendulum arc, so it may take a completly different course of actions from canon. The twin fic, you said it will go under a rewrite, didnt even started soul society arc. I am just curious how long I can enjoy your fic.

And I admit I am curious about how Kaien will play out in some of the anime only arcs. I am manga only reader, and I dont really watch anime in general, but I am seriously considering to watch the anime arc only episodes. Im pretty sure that you will skip those parts, but can you show us what do you think of them?

I'm glad you're enjoying what I've written so far.

Kaien is a criminally underused character and he was one of my favourites for a good long time. I genuinely believe he and Ichigo would've gotten on extremely well, and that Kaien would've been the big brother Ichigo never realised he needed.

For Black and Blue, obviously its going to be canon divergent by virtue of Kaien's living status and his speed-running Ichigo through 'How To Train Your Hollow'. Events will not marry up to the canon timeline. At least not completely, Aizen will face the music - that's a given.

Truth be told I actually dislike Thousand Year Blood War. And in my story, several character's fates set in stone. Many of which run heavily contradictory to the events of TYBW, so I'm electing to ignore that arc. If I touch the Quincy conflict... I'd probably rejig a lot of lore for my narrative.

Tangentially, regarding the flirting with a Quincy joke? BB!Kaien already has an endgame love interest. Hilarious as that would be, they are not a Quincy.

Lost Agent Arc is... one that I've grown to appreciate as I've gotten older, but back when I was reading Bleach week by week, I found it completely insufferable and I spent most of my time bemoaning 'Hurry up and give him his powers back, Kubo."

Though, frankly, I never bought why Ichigo had to lose his powers in the first place, especially when the Hyog had established weaknesses within it which would’ve allowed victory by attrition. And Duex Ex Final Getsuga hits a wrong note with me no matter how you slice it. You can’t describe it as anything other than an ass pull and hand of the author at play.

My conclusion as an adult looking back; Lost Agent, I sit comfortably on the fence. Its okay. Not offensive, not inoffensive, just average. That being said, I have touched on Ginjo Kugo's existence in BB, so that might be another thing I'll have to explore as part of the epilogue. Or in a side/sequel story.

However. My dislike for TYBW aside, I do intend to write independent What-If scenarios for certain events that take place; Kaien's reaction to Ukitake's sacrifice, what Sternritter I'd of had him fight. Things of that nature.

My intention for Black and Blue is to conclude the Winter War with Aizen's defeat and have the Zanpakutou Rebellion arc (anime only) function as a winddown with some rejigging to make it fit into BB's narrative. Then a 'Where are they now' epilogue some years or decades hence because after this hell, these guys have earned their happy endings.

Once More To See You Again I'm focusing on transforming it into a cohesive narrative with some liberties taken with worldbuilding. Rather than have Rukia be persecuted for creating a Shinigami Substitute when there's clearly provisions for one; she pleads guilty to interfering with the Cycle of Souls and reassociation with a reincarnated soul. In OMTSYA Rukia is trapped in a catch-22; Report the Shinigami substitute which reveals the reassociation and end in both their executions, or request a transfer, which leaves a substitute undocumented and unsupervised and end in both their executions. Dealing with that conundrum is going to be interesting. :)

(That, and I didn't like Kaien's aspects fighting each other during Ashewallen. Especially considering how Ichigo's aspects only ever desired to protect him.)

That will last until at LEAST the end of Soul Society. But I do have ideas for interactions with the Visoreds, other Arrancars and how Hueco Mundo would go down. Let's face it: Neo!Kaien vs Aaronerio!Kaien would be a delicious match-up and great character exploration.

Nepenthe was inspired by Cywscross' Swinging Pendulum (but really, what Bleach Time-travel story isn't these days?) - but I wanted to take all the usual time-travel clichés attached to Ichigo and play them completely straight. Rather than pretending, Ichigo does legitimately have amnesia. Rather than hiding his power, Ichigo was injured in such a way that he needs to regain his powers the old fashioned way. Effectively, I dumped him in the past with a clean slate and I look forward to seeing how he adapts to living with and as a Shiba.

But to answer your question: So, how long do you planned to write your works?

For as long as people keep reading and commenting on it, I suppose. :)

There's a criminal lack of Kaien content. I aim to rectify this.

#kaien shiba #ichigo kurosaki #my writing #bleach #bleach tybw #bleach arrancar #bleach au

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sagemoderocklee · 1 year

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...and that's another year of writing done!

Happy New Year's, everyone! Can't believe we've gone through yet another year of a pandemic (despite what government's around the world tell us about it being over).

This year was a strange one. The later half of the year feels like such a haze for me, days bleeding together, much like they did in 2020. Why? Because, after two years of being as safe as possible, I caught Covid. And not only did I catch Covid in early May, I was one of the lucky ones to get Long Haul Covid, and with that I have spent the last half of 2022 on a medical leave.

It's been a difficult year for me. There are very few things about 2022 that went according to plan--between catching Covid and simply not having the money, my plans to move to Ireland at the end of this summer didn't happen, and while the plan is to postpone my move, to when is still to be decided. I have also let my sewing and portfolio building fall to the wayside, largely--again--because of my health.

However, there are some things to be happy about and this post is my chance to look back and celebrate my writing victories.

sagemoderocklee's 2022 Fic Wrap

Absolution: Part IV (WiP)

While the goal had been to end the year with another update, tragically it was not in the cards. My health being what it is and my focus being on completing other projects, and Absolution being the huge piece it is, I felt it made more sense not to try pushing out Part V. However, I am very happy I was able to start the year with an Absolution update as this fic is very much one of my faves. The fourth part of this fic was a bit of a challenge to write, especially in the middle, but I finally hit on the beats I really needed. A big complication with Absolution was that the remaining 6 chapters, which I had fully planned and plotted, needed tweaking... which is to say Absolution needed to be longer. So I had to move all the plotting I had from Part IV on and rebuild and entirely rewrite each chapter/scene-by-scene breakdown. I'm pretty solid at the moment with Parts V through VIII in terms of plotting, and now I think I can safely say this fic will be a total of 13 chapters (the last one being an epilogue), but that could change since I still have to finish all the restructuring. I know all the key beats and the end goal, but sorting out the getting from one point to the next is really the big issue. However, all that being said, I do want to start the new year with Absolution, so that will be my top priority for January!

Pomegranate Sun: Ch1 (WiP) Co-authoring with @ghoste-catte

The first chapter of this fic I started writing a couple years ago, sometime after I got the prologue from @ghoste-catte. And then, of course, I stopped and didn't touch it again for... ages. But with the Naruto-Run last December and @ghoste-catte wanting to have a special fic for the big milestone of 100 GaaLee fics, it was time to work on this baby again. It is absolutely no surprise that when I get to worldbuild I'm in my comfort zone, so even though it took a while, once I got into working on this (while sick with covid, no less) I was happy. And this is going to be such a fresh piece of worldbuilding since we're bringing in OCs from the far west of Wind Country!

Plus One (COMPLETE)

So, I signed up for a bingo challenge and ended up writing a slightly spicy one-shot. Certainly not the spiciest thing in the world, but I very much enjoy writing flirty!Gaara. I have a LOT of feelings about the way fandom and even the canon blank period treats him surrounding sex/sexuality, and it's really informed a lot of how I view and approach Gaara as a gay male character. This wasn't like a huge piece (though I have an even sexier sequel planned), but it was so much fun.

It Eats Your Heart: Ch2 (WiP)

Chapter 2 of IEYH took me about a year to write. I was struggling. It gave me writer's block. It made me wanna throw my computer. My roommate helped me workshop it a bit. And it still took me forever to finish it. Then finally--FINALLY--I hit on what was missing. This chapter was a fucking bitch, but gotdamn was it worth it. I'm so happy with how this turned out and I'm so looking forward to finishing this fic in the new year.

Pearl-Filled Lungs: II, III, IV, Epilogue (COMPLETE)

My beloved enemy. This fic sat for three years, untouched and miserable. I'd started chapter two... last year? The year before? I don't remember, and it languished. I think it was just the first scene--maybe just part of the first scene. But god it was a struggle. I signed up for the WiP BB last year, but dropped. Signed up again this year and... committed. Largely because of the artist who, though unable to complete art for this fic, was such a huge inspiration. The WIPs they sent me... I wish I could share them because they were stunning. When they were unable to continue, I really thought I'd give up, but once again @ghoste-catte inspired me to continue, thanks to their generous offer to make banners for my fic--and the banners are truly such a work of art! And someone... I got through this fic. I think my original vision comes through, despite how much I bitched and moaned during the process. I wanted to write a fairy tale, and I did. And honestly, I am happy with P-FL. It's not my most popular fic, by any means, but it will always hold a special place in my heart.

My Home is Your Home: Ch1 (WiP)

And here we have a fic that was meant to be a one-shot. I was gonna try and get this done in under 10.5k for an event challenge, but then I talked with my roommate and... they looked at me like 'bitch who the fuck do you think you are' and you know what, they were right. I was foolin myself. This fic wasn't a one-shot. I'd come up with an idea for something much bigger than a one-shot, and I'm glad I listened to them. So instead of an event challenge, I reworked everything and turned this into a fic for the @puregaalee Horror Fest, and I am sooooo excited that I did. Paranormal Romance isn't a genre I've dabbled in, and I'm stoked to try weaving the horror genre with RomCom elements. This fic not only ended up being a much bigger piece than I'd intended, but it also has a planned sequel! Because I wouldn't be me if I didn't add more WiPs to my docket than I subtract.

Blood on the Branches: Ch1 (WiP)

Talk about a fic that was pulled out of my ass at THEE last minute. For Horror Fest, I was struggling to come up with an idea. I knew what prompts I was vibin with, but damn I couldn't think of a single thing. And then one night, laying in bed I came up with an idea.... An entirely different idea from this because with only days left to finish, I scrapped everything I had (and by scrapped, I mean moved to a different document) and came up with something completely new! And so instead of straight horror, I leaned into what I'm good at and now I have a horror/adventure story! While the original concept for this fic is good, I am way more excited about this! Once again, taking my worldbuilding to new heights as we leave Suna and head to the south of Wind! I don't know exactly when I'll be able to get the next chapter out, and I really need to sit down and plot this in full, but I am so excited to write this story!

The Corn Maze House (COMPLETE)

Well, it was a bit of a slog towards the mid-point, but I got through it. I honestly worried I wouldn't, but in the end I'm really glad I didn't give up or give in to feeling negatively about the writing process for this piece. I'm not fully happy with it, but I am happy it's done. The premise for this fic, in my entirely unbiased opinion, is very good, even if I'm still not sure of the execution. I may end up going back over this fic in the future, but regardless I'm happy to have a completed horror fic under my belt, and also to not be adding another WiP to my roster. Definitely very light on the GaaLee, despite being an established relationship, but that was kind of how it had to be, so I'm sure this won't be like a crazy popular fic, necessarily. But I still think this was good practice with the horror genre.

Return to Sender: Ch1-11 (COMPLETE)

Talk about a fic I never expected. RtS was meant to be a simple, cute lil RomCom. A dash of miscommunication, a whole lot of comedy of errors, and just a smidge of drama... The ask prompt that started this definitely did not make any indication that I needed to write a 90k+ drama about homophobia in the shinobi world or about the mistakes you make when you're terrified of losing someone important to you. But I simply am the person I am, and I am the writer I am. This was the direction that felt right, and honestly, I'm so glad because I am so happy with how this story turned out and the reception this fic has received is truly astronomical. I dove into it following completing chapter 1 of PomSun and in between working on P-FL because P-FL was the struggle it was. RtS gave me a much needed break and the first three and a half chapters were such a breath of fresh air. When I say those first three chapters were a breeze to write, I mean I think it took me less than a week to write them. This was (sort of) the first time in over a decade I've had a fully completed multi-chapter fic that I can post on a schedule, and GOD it felt so good to just post chapters weekly. RtS Sundays were the highlight of my week, and even though towards the end there were a lot of complications, it was truly such a joy and has made me want to work harder to get fics done before posting. Also! Not only did I have a ball writing this fic, but I also had a lot of fun making the images that I included in it and the soundtrack to go with it. While some of the images are... less exciting than others, this fic just felt like the perfect opportunity to do some mixed media stuff, and I do really enjoy making soundtracks for fics. I have to say, though I love so many of my fics, RtS will now have a very special place in my heart. The reception, surpassing 1million with it, and just the way it all fell into place... I am truly so filled with joy by how this fic went.

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Total WiPs at the start of 2022: 16 Total completed works: 4 Total new works: 5 Total updates: 21 Total new words: 186,296 Total words (Ao3): 1,011,369 (-2,521 PomSun = 1,008,848) Total WiPs at the end of 2022: 17

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2022 Resolutions

The difference between this year's writing and last year's is kinda wild ngl. All that time on medical leave and not sewing really gave me a lot of time to write, (though I do wish I'd been healthy enough to sew more). Looking back at my writing resolutions from the start of the year to now, I can definitely say I'm proud of what I've accomplished, even if it seems like I didn't reach that many resolutions. The two biggest resolutions (1million words and finishing P-FL) were reached, and honestly hitting those two goals was the greatest accomplishment of the year.

So, while most of what I'd had planned for this year was updating fics from last year's Naruto-Run to 1K which didn't happen, I still think this year was a success!

Reach 1million words--168,358 words to go!✅So, the math I did at the end of last year for how many words I needed was actually wrong. I needed closer to 178k, but despite this minor math mishap, I not only reached 1 million words, I surpassed it! I have been trying to hit this overall word count for the past three or so years, and I am utterly shocked, amazed, and proud of myself for making it happen this year! Admittedly, I think this goal was reached because I ended up getting long covid and have spent June through the end of the year out of work and home. Still, this is by no means a small feat, especially given the number of words I needed to reach this year while also being disabled by covid. Long haul is no joke and the brain fog--ohhhh lemme tell you! that shit got me so fucked up, so managing to power through and find joy in writing in spite of that struggle was really important. Writing was one of the few real joys I had in my days these past months, and I could not be more thrilled to finally say I've surpassed 1 million words. Truly, I owe most of that to RtS, the most unexpected fic of 2022.

Write the sequel to Flyweight Love❌Not Reached. Part of me was sure I'd get this done at the end of the year, following Horror Fest, but RtS became priority #1 instead, so HB3 will be on the docket for next year!

Finish IEYH❌Not Reached. While I didn't reach this goal, I did manage to update this fic, finally. Chapter two was a difficult journey and actually caused a lot of writer's block for me between the end of last year-early this year, so while I didn't finish this fic I did still make progress and for that I am very happy. My hope is to accomplish this goal in the new year now!

Finish Pearl-Filled Lungs✅REACHED! This is a pretty big one because it's been hanging over me for... long time. Three years, in fact. But I signed up for the WiP Big Bang and managed to actually get all four chapters written, edited, and published! It always feels like such a relief to be able to cross something completely off my list, but especially something that's been weighing on me the way P-FL was. In many ways, I wasn't happy with the journey, but I am happy with the end of it. I think P-FL is a lot better than I give it credit for, so I am really proud of it and proud that I got this finished.

Finish The Passing of Things❌Not Reached. I was actually really hoping to get this done, so I'm going to make this a goal for next year!

Update Absolution (Ch 4-6)✅❌❌Partially fulfilled. While I did not get three updates in for Absolution, I still got one so that's a partial win for me!

Update TAoL (Ch12)❌Not Reached. Sadly, this update was not in the cards for me this year, which is truly a tragedy for me because it's been two years since the last time I updated. But unfortunately, this next chapter has a lot of issues that need fixing, so getting through has not been easy. However, it is a top priority in the new year!

Update TBotDatP aka the Ballad❌Not Reached. Another fic I was hoping to update, but alas, not this year. But the first chapter is very much underway, so with any luck, I'll be getting a Ballad update out in short order!

Update WNNBYT aka the Hanahaki fic❌Not Reached. While this is a fic I'm excited to work on, it has lost priority in favor of other fics. Maybe next year, but I don't want to make it a resolution since I have fics I'd rather focus on over this.

Update Pomegranate Sun (Ch1)✅ Reached! Amazingly, I was able to get chapter one of this fic out, though it did take a while. However, I'm very proud of how that first chapter turned out and excited to continue this fic with @ghoste-catte in the new year!

Update 13S❌Not Reached. I did get a good chunk of the next update for this worked on, but tragically the amount of worldbuilding needed for this chapter put a wrench in my plans to move forward. However, the worldbuilding has been done in large part, so I am looking forward to getting this fic updated next year!

Edit Alliance❌Not reached. In general, Allied Nations has not been on my mind or at the top of my list. I think, more than likely it won't be until I get TAoL finished, as that's a similarly huge project, even as a stand alone story.

Update Honor Bound❌Not reached. Similar to the above. And while I do have the first three chapters written, I don't want to dive into posting any more chapters of this fic until I've edited Alliance and made the changes to it I know are needed.

Resolutions Reached✅: 3.5 Resolutions Not Reached❌: 9.5

---

2023 Resolutions

With 2022 at an end and a lot more writing done than I expected, I'm hoping to carry that energy into 2023, regardless of other things. I do hope to move to Ireland and get back into sewing regularly, but as my health has changed much of my life, I'm also anticipating more time at home as I shift into working from home. So with that, I hope I also find more time and energy to focus on writing.

This is a lot, and I do not expect to get all of this done, but the goal is to get as much of it done as I can. I have a lot of motivation, so here's to a successful writing year in 2023!

Complete IEYH

Complete Absolution

Complete MHiYH

Complete TPoT

Update 13S (3-6)

Update TAoL (12-15)

Update PomSun (Ch3)

Update TBotDatP aka The Ballad (Ch-4)

Update TEA (Ch1)

Update TCoS (Ch1)

Update BotB (Ch2)

Publish the sequel to Flyweight Love, HB3

Publish The Beautiful Beast of Cāngdì (Ch1)

Publish A Cat's Guide to Finding Love

Complete at least three more MFBingo squares

#fic wrap #end of year writing summary #my fanfiction #gaalee

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not-so-mundane-after-all · 1 year

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Hi my love

💝💌💘

Z, my darling!

💝what is a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

I have to talk about My Hand Was The One You Reached For here, my first ever TLOU fic. The response to it? INSANE. I came here from a fandom where, especially recently, stuff about a father-daughter relationship wasn't getting much traction, so since I was used to a small response, I wasn't really expecting anything. I first made a Tumblr post about it, again, not expecting more than a handful of notes. After all I'm a fandom newbie who only came here because of the show, I knew close to nothing about the game. And then the post got thousands of notes in a matter of hours. People were dropping their own fics in the reblogs!!! I dropped mine on ao3 and it got more kudos & comments in a single day than my most recent Titans fics got in months!!! That never happened to me before. I've had popular fics but never to this extent, never so fast. So I was absolutely blown away. Thank you guys for welcoming me so kindly 🥹

💌share something with us about an up-and-coming work (WIP) that has you excited!

Since I'm currently splitting my writing time between two fandoms, right now I don't have anything started for The Last of Us, but I can list the ideas I will be working on once I'm done working on my Titans ideas.

Ellie forgives Joel by writing a song about it, based on Back to December by Taylor Swift - but before I get to that I want to watch the gameplay of tlou2 and torture myself since I don't know the full story. For science.

Ellie overhears the word "adoption" at school and asks Joel to explain it to her.

Another dancing fic, something based in Jackson, though I don't have a clear picture of it yet. Although I'm thinking about the kitchen. You know, another T Swift lyrics, dancing in the refrigerator light.

As for Titans, I'm currently in the process of writing the last two chapters of my newest multi-chapter Acrida, which is a time travel fic that can cause you a baby fever 🤭 but come on, which fictional father we all know and love would pass on a chance to go back in time and get to know his adopted kid when they were just a tiny little baby? There's some angst though, I actually wrote the heaviest scene today and I spent a good ten minutes crying. But I'll be keeping that under wraps and instead share something sweet.

The snowflakes falling around them became bigger. Few of them settled on his hair, one dropping right onto his nose and that was a game changer; Rachel's eyes grew round like dinner plates, lips forming a tiny ooh as she swatted at it with her hand.

"What's that?" Dick gasped, his eyes as wide as hers. "Snow? You like snow?"

She blinked at him a few times, entranced by the sound of his voice. Then she broke into a giggle, twisting in his arms as she laughed.

Dick tucked her closer to himself, laughing as well. She was the sweetest child, her sparkling personality already shining through, and her baby laugh could easily have the power to clear the sky off the heaviest clouds.

💘Is there any posted fic you want to rework/re-edit/re-write?

I once had this thought to rewrite my earliest fics because reading them made me cringe and I know I would have done them better now when I'm more experienced. But I decided against it because it shows the progress I've made as a writer, how much I've actually learned. So they'll stay cringe. If y'all want to binge my fics, start from the bottom so they get better instead of getting worse lol 😂

There's one though, where I only realized the issue recently. There's this collab AU fic for Titans I wrote with a friend. Huge thing, our best work to date, HIGHLY RECOMMEND READING (shameless self promo but fuck it we ballin) it's called Wicked Game. Recently, we started developing a sequel. Nothing written yet, only brainstorming and exchanging notes for now, but I realized recently that damn we really fucking put ourselves into a corner with that epilogue 🫣🤭

#mundi asks #writer ask game #dc titans #the last of us

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ren-c-leyn · 2 years

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Happy STS, Ren!^^ Great start for the special celebration posts, looking forward to the other ones✨

How have you been? Any project/writing/thinking updates? :D

About Gods from Forgotten Gods - what kind of shape do they have? Where do they "live"? They can't really interact with the world other than through the champions, right? So do they have their own realm? Can they interact there? Can they see themselves and each other there? How does it work with them and where does their interest in mortals and champions come from?

@writingonesdreams

Happy STS to you too, Dreams ^^ I come bearing the promised ramble!I checked the word count for the lore part of the ramble, and it’s over 1,800 words XD I knew it was going to be a long one, but this entire post is as long as a chapter of The Shackles of Time.

I'll start with the update ^^ It's going under the readmore with the ramblings though because it turned into a ramble in of itself XD (I think it's almost as long as the lore ramble....) But! I think it's a ramble you'll enjoy since I've been having thoughts about your favorite projects now that I've got a little bit of breathing room from the Anniversary specials.

I'm wrapping up the last of the celebration posts. It's taking me a little longer than I wanted, but I just have one left to go and then I can get back to my other projects. I just noticed that I only have enough The Shackles of Time chapters scheduled to get through October's bonus chapters, so I will be buckling down and hitting it hard until I have enough to get through January.

I'll have to do quite a bit of writing on it, though, since December is also going to have 2 extra posts and I'm going to be releasing an extra chapter on January 1st to celebrate new years as well. So, that's 8 chapters I need to write, or at least rewrite, and then schedule before I'll feel comfortable enough to get back to work on Forgotten Gods' second draft.

That being said, Firewalker has been chewing on my brainstem for attention recently, so I may begin prepping the rewrite notes for it's second draft. I just really miss Thistle and Valerian and the birds and the utter chaos that is their lives and disaster of a friendship XD

I'm also still thinking of drawing the casts of all of my WIPs and doing proper character introductions for everyone. But that's going to be a very ambitious project that I'm not going to touch until I recover from the 1- year Shackles of Time Anniversary celebration. I've loved every second of setting up for it, but it has also been a bit draining on the creative batteries.

I've also been playing with ideas for what I want to do with The Forgotten Gods' world once I'm done with the current story. It's left off on a bit of a cliffhanger, so I could try to build up a plot for a sequel and keep playing with our favorite trio of social disasters and their Gods. I even have an idea of where to start building the plot points because of the motives of said Gods. There's also some new developments that happened towards the end of the story that I'd love to explore more, and plenty that I think can be done around the old, misty forest.

But, a certain enabler's questions (*coughs* you *coughs*) has got me thinking about my original concept for that world again. All of the weirdness of the Gods clashing and messing with mortals that isn't as show-cased as I wanted.... But I got to thinking on it. There's hundreds of Gods in that fictional world, and thousands upon thousands of unlucky mortals who are forced to deal with said gods. And I may have thought of an MC and God combo that is a match made by chaos, is 100% problematic for both parties but it's too late now, and while it's only a vague concept it already promises to be fun to play with. If it works out the way it is in my head, it will be a lighter, more chaotic, more swearing involved story than the original, but it would still be very much in The Forgotten Gods' world.

So I'm not sure which option I'm going to go with. Eventually I'll probably end up pursuing both, it's just a matter of picking which route sounds like more interesting. Though, even if I did know which one I liked the sounds of, which one interests me more might change by the time I get there. So I'm not pushing myself to make the choice now. I'm just letting my mind play with possibilities.

And before I get to that, I have The Dark Princess of Aconitum to consider. I think I have everything in place for book one of the trilogy, except the names of course, though it's going to be a beast of a project to actually sit down and write. The details are going to be the key with making it work and the foreshadowing is going to have to be on point but subtle. Luckily, I'll have several drafts to get it all ironed out ^^ I'm not sure if it's going to be the kind of project I can set down and work on other things between books or if it's going to be one of those that I can't stop until the series is done, though. As complex as it is, pausing it could muddy it in my mind and this isn't the kind of story I can afford to let get messy. And that's part of why I want to clear my plate a bit before I get started on it to give me the room to work primarily on it and Shackles of Time side by side.

The dragon/warrior woman idea has not entirely faded, it's just quieted down, so I think it just needs more time to simmer and decide what kind of story it wants to be before it decides when it wants to be worked on, and that's okay. As you've probably noticed from the rest of this ramble, I've got a lot going on ^^;

Okay, I thought the update section was going to be shorter than it turned out to be, but apparently I’ve been thinking more than I thought I have. ^^; So onto your real question -

Each God of Forgotten Gods has a different form. Some of them are more humanoid than others. Some look absolutely monstrous. And some are just plain weird. Their appearances are as varied as the Gods themselves.

Here's three examples from the gods I built for the story -

Corona looks a lot like a human woman with very dark skin, long black hair, and wings. She is constantly surrounded by an aura of light so bright, however, that it would be very hard to actually see her without going blind. She is a power sun goddess, after all, and you can not look at the sun.

Eternity is kinda humanoid. He's blue skinned, abnormally tall and slender, with sharp claws and horns and glowing purple eyes.

Cordial is... less humanoid. He has a deer head, fur, antlers and is a towering height compared to even Eternity.

These appearances are subject to change, however. I haven’t worked out all of the details of this aspect as it never really comes into play, but I imagine that as a God gains more followers their appearance evolves, like how Corona has an aura of light, though her temples depict how she’d appear without it. The depiction likely came from priests/priestesses she gave visions to before she gained her aura. I also imagine that as Eternity regains his foothold in mortality, aspects of his appearance will change as well. Though I’m not sure if that will come into play in later books or not, but it definitely didn’t in Forgotten Gods.

Which makes sense since Silver is basically his one and only follower, which kinda makes her the default high priestess and head of his religion, but she’s extremely anti-social and rarely speaks of either of her Gods. And since she’s the only one, he doesn’t really have the strength to do anything on his own. Soooo, he’s not getting many new followers anytime soon XD

And I suppose that dove-tails nicely into ‘ They can't really interact with the world other than through the champions, right? ‘

They can! They’re Gods, they can do whatever they like, for better or worse, often worse. They can send random people visions, talk in certain people’s minds, mess up your dreams, summon monsters, pull new animals out of thin air and release them into the ecosystem, reshape the landscape on a whim, paint the trees different colors, change the weather, among lots of other weird stuff. I’m sure some poor farmer woke up one morning to find an entire mountain range where their crops had been last night thanks to a God’s whims. That’s part of why what God is in control of a region is so important to the people there.

However, Gods are beings of pure divine energy, so they can’t come into the mortal realm themselves. If they try, terrible things happen to the world as mortals cannot touch the divine without great harm. It tears their bodies apart, and it also messes with the environment and world in general. One evil god tried it once, but all of of the other Gods dog-piled him and then set about cutting him off from the mortal realm to protect themselves and their own followers. So all Gods have an unspoken agreement since then - no one enters the mortal realm. Anyone who does gets Forgotten.

So the champions are an important part of how they conduct their business in the mortal realm, they can act where a God cannot necessarily due to their restrictions, but normal people are too. Sometimes a God will give you a vision, knowing you tell your one friend all of your weird dreams so that friend will get the message. Sometimes a priestess will be cued in on someone the God wishes to help. Sometimes a random dude will accidentally bumble his way into letting an evil God’s pet monster loose on the world. Mortals make useful aids when it comes to setting up the Gods’ games, whether they like it or not.

The Gods can handle some things on their own, though, like you can absolutely get lightening bolted by a cruel god of storms for saying he’s cruel out loud and a goddess of protection can absolutely shield you from a blow that would have killed you and so on. But they aren’t omnipresent, so sometimes things happen when you’re God isn’t looking for better and worse, and Gods also have a hard time acting outside of their territory in mortal domains. If you say worship a relatively unknown sun god and walked into one of the large swaths of territory Corona controls, your God cannot really be counted on to you because Corona can just a laugh at anything he tries to day and say ‘no’ and block his ability to do anything.

Now then, as for where do they live and how they interact with each other, each God has their own realm. Their own little reality bubble. They can see themselves in them as they experience these reality bubbles much like we experience our lives.

The realms are set by the Gods themselves and can be redecorated to fit their interests and liking. Some God’s realms never stop changing, some God’s realms haven’t changed since they came into existence.

There isn’t a large common realm, but if a God’s influence comes into contact with another God’s influence, like two champions meeting, they become aware of each other and can link their realms together so that they can talk face to face. When realms are linked, the Gods can walk over to each other’s domains like walking to a next door neighbor’s home. These links can be severed either by the will of one of the gods or by one of the gods no longer having the strength to maintain the connection. Fun fact - In Forgotten Gods’ a pantheon references to a group of Gods who’ve all linked their realms together and decided to stay linked. They’re like friend groups or alliances. Another fun fact - Eternity and his husband, another God whose name he can’t seem to recall, were apart of a pantheon before that pantheon lost a territory war and were all Forgotten.

Here’s three examples of what the realms can look like using the Gods from before -

Eternity’s realm is a ship on a starry sea with fog rolling over the waves and multiple moons overhead. Any light not from the stars or moons glows purple regardless of the source and it’s always night.

Corona’s realm is a city in the sky. It’s perpetual daytime with clouds floating beneath it. Her divine messengers, made in her image so they are also dark-skinned humans with wings and golden eyes, all live there along with her faithful companions, four golden dragons. There is almost constant singing and color everywhere in the city.

Cordial’s domain is actually a massive, rustic log cabin complete with a large living room with rocking chairs and a hearth, a large kitchen with nice tea sets, a basement stockpiled with thousands of different ingredients and wines and the like, among other things.

And now for your last question - where does their interest in mortals come from. This links into the phrase ‘being Forgotten’ you might have noticed me use a few times, so this is a good wrap up question ^^

Divine energy feeds on mortals’ attention. Gods need to be acknowledged by the mortals as a part of survival. It doesn’t matter if it’s positive interactions or negative interactions, but they need someone to say they are real or they get Forgotten. When a God is Forgotten they lose their connection to the mortal realm and their own divine realm starts starving. Over time, the God grows weaker as it feeds on their own divine energy, then the God starts to lose their memory, and then the realm starts to eat itself with little elements going missing day by day, and then, if no one remembers them or finds proof that they were once there, they disappear.

Every god is terrified of disappearing. Even the evil ones.

So when Gods get into wars, is never comes to blows between them directly. No, they direct the mortals to go after that other Gods’ following. Priests, priestesses, and champions are usually the first targets. Then they go after the every day people who followed their enemy. Temples are desecrated, holy texts burned, and tragedy thick. It’s a literally fight for their lives for both the Gods and the mortals. If a priest/priestess realizes their side is going to lose, they usually have something connect to their god smuggled out by someone who doesn’t know them so that one day their God may break out of being Forgotten. This has saved many gods, and gotten many innocent traveling merchants killed for being in the wrong place during a God war. The goal is to destroy any evidence that a God ever existed so that they will not get any divine energy replenished.

It quite savage and brutal when wars between gods happen in this world.

All of this said, worshipers and loyal followers are usually preferred by Gods. Having someone doing what you say/ask feeds the divine energy more, and in the case of a God war, a willing follower is more likely to try and save you than the guy you’ve annoyed with random holes in the ground for the last three years. Plus, the more divine energy you’re generating in an area, the more secure your territory is and loyal worshipers attract more mortals to you and will probably at least talk about you or say prayers which feeds the divine realm and increases their influence.

There are some Gods who don’t care about any of that, though, and continue annoying mortals for the fun of it. XD

Champions are mortals who have been infused with divine energy, giving them magic and such. I remember giving you a ramble about them specifically before, and I think I remember talking about how divine energy will eat at a Champion’s body if they use too much along with the varied types of powers champions can get. But as for why the gods are interested in making them, the increased power of a champion is a draw for a lot of people. It’s proof of the God’s power, gives the god a mortal agent to deal with rival God’s followers, threats to their own followers, and just go out and win fame and influence for them in general. However, maintaining a champion is difficult since the god has to maintain a constant connection to the mortal plane and keep it open. If they open it too far, the divine energy will kill their champion. If the connect gets too weak the champion can’t draw on their power, this is much more difficult if the champion is outside of their realm. Which is why most Gods only have one or two champions since they have other things to do and don’t want to just spend their time maintaining a dozen different connections to their realm all day.

And that’s my ramble. If you have follow up questions just let me know ^^ Thanks for stopping in, Dreams. I hope you have a lovely day/evening.

#sts #Forgotten Gods

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