#tell me there isn't room for shenanigans with this family TELL ME THERE ISN'T | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cherryrainn · 4 months

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begging u for some fem reader blitzø smut 🙏 we need more blitzø content in this world

━━ ✧ 𝐮𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐧 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐬 ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

─ ✩ 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 ; blitzø + fem!reader

─ ✩ 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄 ; i'm proud of this. and YEAH SO TRUE

─ ✩ 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 ; sexual content, smut, oral sex, penetrative sex, rough sex, dirty talk,

you push open the heavy door to i.m.p headquarters, expecting to hear the usual cacophony of voices and the shenanigans that often accompany a typical workday. instead, you're met with an unsettling silence. the absence of moxxie's chatter, millie's boisterous laughter, and even loona's sarcastic remarks leaves the place feeling eerily still.

raising an eyebrow, you shrug off the unusual quietude and decide to head straight to blitzo's office. the walls adorned with contracts and pictures of past assignments close in on you as you make your way down the corridor.

you've always sensed a strange, electric tension between you and blitzo. the stolen glances, the lingering touches — yet, neither of you has dared to cross that unspoken boundary.

as you approach blitzo's office, you can't help but feel a flutter in your chest. was he even in there?

you've had your eyes on each other for what feels like forever, but circumstances, or maybe just sheer cowardice, have kept things between you strictly professional.

you knock lightly on blitzo's door, already half-expecting it to swing open without a response. to your surprise, the door creaks open almost immediately, revealing blitzo leaning back in his chair, feet propped up on the desk cluttered with paperwork and empty whiskey bottles. was he waiting for you? classic.

"ah, if it isn't the most fuckable employee walkin' through that door," blitzo drawls, his red eyes lighting up with mischief as he takes in your appearance. "took ya long enough."

rolling your eyes but unable to hide the smirk tugging at your lips, you step into the room, closing the door behind you. "looks like everyone decided to play hooky today. even loona?"

blitzo chuckles, lowering his feet to the ground as he leans forward, resting his elbows on the desk. "yeah, somethin' like that. mox and mil.. more like a 'family day out,' or some sappy shit like that. loona.. i dunno. left me here all alone, can you believe it?"

you say nothing. you move closer to the desk.

it's just you and him.

blitzo breaks the silence first, his voice husky and laced with an unfamiliar vulnerability. "y'know, for all the shit we've been through, all the near-death experiences and fucked-up assignments, there's somethin' i've been meanin' to tell you."

your heart pounds in your chest as you lean in, captivated by the intensity in his eyes. "oh? and what's that?"

he smirks, a devilish glint in his gaze as he reaches across the desk, his fingers lightly grazing yours. "fuck the paperwork."

before you can process what's happening, blitzo is standing before you, his arms wrapping around you, pulling you into a rough kiss.

your lips crash against his as he tightens his grip on you, his hands roaming over your body, desperate and hungry. he bites your bottom lip, earning a moan from you, and your tongues dance together as you deepen the kiss.

heat pools in your core as blitzo's hand slips under your top, his claws raking down your back. he pushes you onto the desk, and you find yourself trapped beneath him, his frame pressing you against the wooden surface.

the sound of ripping fabric fills the room as blitzo tears off your top, exposing your bare chest. he lowers his mouth to your breasts, his tongue teasing your nipples before sucking on them. you writhe beneath him, your breath hitching as his fingers trail down your stomach and under the waistband of your jeans.

"tell me you want this," blitzo murmurs, his voice hoarse with desire as his fingers brush against your clit.

"yes, please, i want you," you whisper, your own voice trembling as you cling to him.

that's all the encouragement he needs. in a blur of movement, blitzo yanks off your pants (or whatever you're wearing) and underwear, tossing them aside as he kneels between your legs.

his tongue flicks against your folds, causing you to buck your hips against him. he chuckles, his breath hot against your sensitive skin, before pushing his tongue inside of you.

you let out a moan as he begins to lick and suck at your entrance, his fingers massaging your clit. the heat inside you is unbearable, and you arch your back, trying to pull him deeper inside of you.

blitzo pulls away, his eyes burning with lust as he looks up at you. "god, you taste so fuckin' good."

you reach down, grabbing his horn, guiding his head back down to your dripping cunt. he groans against you, his tongue plunging inside of you once more, sending shockwaves of pleasure through your body.

the wet sounds of his mouth against your pussy echo throughout the room, mingling with the sounds of your whimpers and moans. you feel yourself growing closer and closer to climax, your grip on his horn tightening.

"fuck, blitz," you whimper, your thighs quivering as you teeter on the edge of release.

suddenly, blitzo stops, pulling away from you. you whimper, the loss of his touch leaving you feeling cold and empty.

"why'd you stop?" you pant, your eyes pleading for him to continue.

"i think you can do better than that," blitzo smirks, his gaze never leaving yours as he slowly rises to his feet, unfastening his pants.

your eyes widen as his cock springs free, already hard and throbbing. his hands grip your thighs, spreading your legs open as he positions himself between them.

you bite your lip as he enters you, your walls stretching to accommodate his size. he grunts, his hands digging into your flesh as he begins to thrust into you.

the sensation of him filling you, his cock hitting every right spot, is almost too much to bear. you cry out, arching your back as he pounds into you, his movements frantic and desperate.

"oh, fuck, blitz!" you moan, your hands grasping his shoulders, holding on for dear life.

"that's better," he growls, his voice ragged and full of need.

his fingers dig into your thighs, the pain mixing with the pleasure, sending you spiraling towards your release. your muscles tense, your body tingling with the delicious friction of him moving inside of you.

"are you gonna cum for me, baby?" he whispers, his eyes locked with yours.

"yes!" you moan, the heat building inside you reaching a breaking point.

blitzo smirks, his thrusts becoming more erratic, more frenzied. "go ahead then, cum for me."

you cry out, the coil of pleasure inside you snapping as you reach your peak. your body shakes with the force of your orgasm, the waves of pleasure crashing over you, leaving you breathless and spent.

blitzo lets out a guttural groan, his cock pulsing inside of you as he comes undone. his hips slam against yours, the wet slap of skin on skin filling the room as he empties himself into you.

you collapse onto the desk, sweaty and panting, the euphoric afterglow of your orgasm washing over you. blitzo leans over you, his face inches from yours, his red eyes gazing into yours.

"shiiit," he says, a satisfied smile spreading across his face. "i think i love you."

you smile, a warmth spreading through your chest as you wrap your arms around him, pulling him closer. "i think i love you too."

#BLITZO #helluva boss #helluva #helluvaboss #helluva boss blitz #helluva boss blitzo #blitzø #blitzo x reader #y/n #reader insert #x reader #ask #rough smut #smut #helluva boss x reader

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last-words-ofashootingstar · 7 months

Text

Moll

❥ Choi San x fem reader

SPOOKTOBER SPECIAL

➯a/n: i've been watching waaaaay too much 1920s drama sooooooo (i went way overboard, i feel liek i wrote a movie)

✃ moll; a mobsters girl, circa 1920s

✫彡wordcount: 6.2k

(✯◡✯)(>ᴗ•)genre: 1920s mafia au, plot heavy smut

ಠ_ಠwarning/content: mentions of drugs, violence, threatening with a gun(safety was on lol), kidnapping, forced marriage, forced affection, stockholm syndrome, pregnancy, murder(not descriptive at all), NSFW; virginity loss, unprotected (NO DO THAT🫵🏻), possessiveness to the max, breeding kink

not proof read

✩ index: dope; drugs, specifically cocaine or heroin. bent; drunk. bump you off; murder. bearcat; a feisty woman. vamp; an aggressive flirt. flat-tire; a bore. punch the bag; talk. dame, doll, bunny, water-proof; a (attractive) woman. holding a torch; having a crush. get in a lather/ get lathered up; get worked up or angry. skin; condom. get a wiggle on; leave quickly.

⁂taglist: @stvrfir3 @tunaasan @marievllr-abg

MATURE UNDER CUT MDNI

"Where's the money?"

"That's all of it! Please, Mister-"

The echoing slap across the room makes you cringe from your hiding place in the pantry. It's nothing new. Your family had been mixed up in all kinds of shenanigans and you had witnessed a great deal of them. But it always hurts when they come back to haunt you.

You cup your hand over your mouth to muffle your scared breath, trying desperately put your mind in a better place. Anywhere but here.

"I gave you more than enough time. Don't you think?"

"Nobodies buying, please Mr. Choi! You have to understand, I tried. I went from corner to corner to corner," your older brother pleads.

He isn't lying either. The drugs that the mafia had provided him to sell- well, they weren't selling. No body had the money. If they did, they only bought the smallest amount and resold it at a higher price.

It wasn't his fault the country was in a depression.

"It- I still have the dope stored away! Just in the back shed, you can have it back! May-maybe someone up North can have better lu-ah!"

A dull thud.

And another.

A crash. Your brothers body hitting the floor no doubt.

"You gon' tell me how to peddle my own product now? I don't think so! Are you bent? Huh?" His voice gets louder with each insult hurled at your brother. "You skim a little of the top, is that it? I oughta bump you off!"

You can't help the small gasp that exits your shaking lips, and you immediately recognize your mistake as it goes silent in the home. Only your brothers ragged breathing and the thrumming of your anxious heart reaching your ears.

"Mr. Ch-"

"Shut your kisser! Who's here with us?"

"N-Nobody! No! No, no, wait-"

Light floods the small room you've sought safety in, and that false sense of security shatters the second you see the man attached to the threatening voice.

He's a cop.

He's got a badge and a gun and authority. He's supposed to be someone safe. Instead, he's got knuckles blooded with your kin and a smirk on his stubbled face.

His wide shoulders block the light, casting his silhouette over you like a storm cloud.

You've cowered into the corner, skirt pulled over your trembling knees as you scoot further away. Wide eyes looking up at him, silently pleading.

"Why you hidin', vamp?"

"Please, Mr.Choi, she don't know from nothing!"

You glance past the man -Mr.Choi- 's neat slacks, and see your brothers face messed with blood, dripping onto the floor from his nose. He's pulling himself up slowly, kneeling on the hardwood.

"Get up," Mr.Choi nods his head at you, and you immediately follow his order, afraid to test his nerves further. "Help this goof up." You lower your head, slowly approaching the man who stays in the doorway. "Now, we ain't got all day!"

You rush past him and kneel, wrapping your arms under his and pulling him up with a grimace, "c'mon, Bub, get up."

The man watches you heave him up, leaning against the wall with his hand on his hip holster in case you decide to get brave. "Bub's done got you mixed up in something real risky, girl. What do you know?"

"Don't know nothin', Mister. Mind my own." You feign some semblance of calm. You lower your brother onto a chair, and he nearly falls onto the dinner table before you catch his head. "You had to knock him on the head?"

He chuckles, slowly stalking around the room, "don't get mouthy, Bearcat." He takes a seat at the head of the table, pointing to the chair opposite of him. "Sit."

You lower his dizzy head to rest on the table before taking the seat he pointed to, folding your hands in your lap and lowering your head. "I never touched your dope, I don't mess with that."

He slowly places his gun on the table, fingers lingering over it. He studies you- eyes never leaving. "How much of the beans has he spilled to you?"

"I don't know what you mean-"

"Oh, sure."

You look up, and you regret floods your veins. He's sizing you up. Face completely void of emotion. Shoulders slack and relaxed like he isn't ready to shoot you at a moments notice. "Punch the bag, now. Before I shoot off your Bubs knee cap." He cocks his gun.

"Okay! Okay, listen-" you gulp, looking back down, "all he's ever told me is that he gets some products and sells them, gives you the money and you give him a cut. That's it! That's all I know, really. Don't know where you get it or nothin'. I can keep my trap shut."

"You don't go to the corners with him?"

"Nev-"

"If I show your face at the station, nobody gonna recognize you?"

"No," you look up again, "everyone knows I'm a good girl, Officer."

He lets out an amused chuckle, rubbing his brow. "You tugging my leg?"

"No. I'm not a drug peddler. I'm a secretary. I volunteer at the soup kitchen. I babysit-"

Your anxious babbling to get yourself out of your brothers trouble is interrupted when Mr.Choi, suddenly behind you, grips the back of your neck and pushes your head to the table. Your eyes meet your brothers drowsy ones, tears quickly filling up in both. "Please, she's tellin' the truth! I ain't even tell her I was selling till you called last minute! She's innocent!"

"I don't like liars!" He shouts, making you jump under his harsh grip, "I asked you if we were alone the moment I walked in this dump! You're a little sneak, aye? How do I know you didn't hide her to gather intel on me? Get me fired and kicked out? Get yourself a little raise? How do I know she's even your sister? She could be a snake! Tell me the truth, now!"

The cool metal of his gun touches your temple, and the sobs you've been holding back fall out of your lips loudly. "Bub, tell him!"

"Tell me, Bub!" He mocks you, pressing the barrel deeper into the back of your head.

"That's the truth! I sell your dope by myself and she doesn't know nothing about it! Please, she's all I have!" He's growing more and more frantic, head heavy as he lifts it to look Mr.Choi in the eyes, "I'll find a way! I'll go up North myself, I-I'll take a dimebox to Iafeild o-or," he himself is crying now, watching helplessly as he tugs you out of your chair. "Please, she's all I have!"

He pushes you to the floor and watches you scramble, kicking your knees out from under you, albeit gently, it makes you fall face first. He lowers himself in a squat, watching you with a certain amusement you curl up on yourself. "Well why didn't you just say so!" He clips his gun back on his hip and smirks as you both let out a sigh of relief.

Mr.Choi doesn't leave just yet, however.

He straddles your back and flips you over, gripping your chin as it trembles. Pulls your face close to his and inspects you. Your tears wet his fingers. "Hmm, can't blame me for being suspicious. She's water-proof and you," he looks over at the table and chuckles, "well you're just a dog."

He stands and extends his hand for you, rolling his eyes as you ignore it. "Get up, Doll." He groans, pulling you to your feet, "go pack a bag."

"W-"

"She's not goin' with you," your brothers brief bravery is shut down the second the copper reaches for his gun again, "I- I mean why?"

"You," Mr.Choi points to him, "are gonna go to Iafeild and sell all of the shit I gave you like you should have done two months ago. And she," he wraps his arm around your shoulders with a cocky grin, "is gonna be your encouragement to get me my money. If you aren't back with all of it in... three weeks, say? Little sis' here is gonna take the big sleep." He ignores you as you cry harder, simply glaring at your brother. "Capiche?"

He nods frantically, looking away as you look to him with pleading eyes. There's nothing he can do. This is bigger than him. He's got messed up with the wrong crowds and now you have to pay the price as well.

"Put a pep in your step, clock starts tonight."

❦

He opens the car door, watching silently as you peek your head out before your body follows.

You clutch your bag close to your chest, still sniffling and sobbing quietly. Your kitten heels click on the cement, messed curls blowing with the October winds.

"Follow me," he guides you by the small of your back, shockingly gentle with your shaking form. "Don't pull any tricks, Doll." He leads you up the stairs of the secluded farm house, opening up the screen door and ushering you in.

"San, Finally!" A voice booms from inside the home, making you squeak. When you turn to go back out the door, you collide with Mr.Choi, who you gather must be San, 's chest. "Was starting to think- oh! Who's the dame?"

"This," he turns you by your shoulders and tilts your head up to face the man who's descending the stairs, "is Mr. (L/n)'s sister. She's staying for a bit while her brother sorts out some business upstate." You can almost feel his smirk in the way he speaks.

The other man, who's finally come face to face with you, seems a great deal less threatening than San.

"Tsk," he rolls his eyes at San, "sure thing, fella. You just went and found yourself a Moll."

"A Moll? Sure, she's cute but she seems a bit flat-tire, no? Not exactly the type of woman I go for."

"She's exactly the type you go for, you're trying to get her in the bag! Lost bunny is your type."

"Oh, take a hike, Hwa!"

You go back and forth looking at them in confusion as they bicker, hugging your bag to your chest tightly. You don't know what a 'Moll' is but you do know you don't want to be Mr. Chois. You simply tune them out and stare at the floor blanky, tears still flowing.

"If you're not holding a torch, why didn't you kill him like we planned?"

"Well-" His words die on his tongue as he looks over at you. You do look like a lost bunny. Making yourself small between them and letting your tears flow as a defense mechanism. He won't admit it, especially aloud. But you are exactly the woman he's been looking for. "Oh, hell," he pulls a blue handkerchief from his pocket and shoves it into your hand, "stop crying so much. Not gonna hurt you."

Very hard to believe after his threats, but you try your hardest to stop the onslaught of warm tears. You wipe your face with the fabric and sniffle quietly, coming back to your own body as Seonghwa extends his hand slowly.

"I'm Seonghwa, 'can call me Hwa if you like. I'll be lookin' after you when San here is busy. Let's get along well."

You shake his hand gently and croak out a simple, "(Y/n)."

❦

The rest of the day passed quickly, locked up in a bedroom while San and Hwa could still be heard downstairs, which only served to add to your anxieties. It felt as if at any second they would change their mind and come up to bump you off.

You busied yourself doing what San told you to before he locked the door behind him. 'Unpack and get cozy.' Though that latter wasn't as easy as hanging your few dresses in the oak closet and putting your hairbrush in the nightstand, awkwardly placing your products in the corner of the attached bathroom. Especially after you pieced things together.

There was an array of suits and slacks hanging in the closet. Shiny loafers on the floor. A clip of bullets in the nightstand. A roll of condoms. A stash of cash in a duffle bag on the hook behind the door. A pack of cigarettes and matches on the window sill. A bottle of cologne that smelled suspiciously like Mr. Chois car.

This was Sans room they had locked you in.

You had long took a seat on the windowsill and dangled your legs out of it, debating how badly it would hurt if you decided to fall and try to make a run for it. You came to the conclusion that it was useless. It took fourty minutes to get here from the city. The last home you passed being 20 of those away.

The lock on the door clinked loudly, and it opened slowly. You turned and looked over your shoulder, and it wasn't a surprise that San was the one you faced.

"Hungry, Doll?" He shuts the door with his foot as he carefully enters with a plate in hand. He doesn't seem alarmed by your hazardous seating choice, probably because he doesn't take you for a fool that will break their ankles trying to jump from the third story.

"No," you mutter, turning back around and facing the setting sun without another word or pleasantry his way.

"Don't let it get cold, I reheated it just for you."

"Too bad. Not hungry."

He comes behind you and rests his palms on either side of your hips, chest pressing to your back as he looks out at natures expanse. "Pretty, ain't it?"

When he doesn't get anything resembling a response, he tries again. "It's my own property. Worked in that barn everyday until I became a cop."

He's met with silence. "Plan to share it with my wife one day."

Nothing. "I know you think I'm a monster but I am just a man."

"A man who had a gun to my head..."

"A man who's just trying to survive a war and a pandemic. You'll get that one day. I don't mean no harm until harm comes for me."

A silence washes over you both for a moment.

"Will you shoot me if my brother doesn't sell all your dope?"

"No."

And again. His soft breath, your anxious ones.

"Then why am I here?"

It's his turn to be silent. He backs away from you and sits on the bed, watching you as you sit still like a statue. You watch the sun disappear like a motion picture of art. A certain peace overcoming you for the briefest moment.

"Because you will be that wife that I share with."

And peace shattered by Choi San once again.

You head snaps in his direction, falling back into the house from the windowsill with a thud. You both stare at one another. San stares with an unreadable expression. Yours of pure horror and confusion. "What?!"

"I'll drop business with your brother for good. Clear all his debt with the boys. Give him all of the cash he gets from this last... adventure. He'll be well off and so will you. I'll make a good, honest woman of you."

"Y-" Yours brain is officially thrown into a panic, an overdrive of emotions, and it all tumbles out before you can stop it. "You have to be off your rocker! You're insane! I already am a good, honest woman! Go chase yourself, I'm not marrying you- you- what? No! No!"

"You 'aven't got much choice in the matter, Doll. Don't get yourself in a lather."

"Don't get- oh, I am lathered up, Mr.Choi! I oughta smack some sense into you, demanding a girls hand in marriage like it's still 1890! It's nineteen-twen-"

He smacks the sense into you before you can to him.

"Oh God," you sob, holding your stinging cheek as tears build up in your waterline. "Oh my God, I'm so sorry," you lower your head. Thinking, surely, you just dug your own grave. "Please-"

"This is exactly why I chose you," he crouches in-front of your crumpled form and tilts your head up, "a dame who appears like a lost bunny but has the soul of a beast."

You simply stare up at him, deathly afraid to move or speak in fear of letting your anger and sadness slip again.

"Got somethin' to say?"

You gulp before nodding your head in his hold.

"Go on."

"I don't w-want to marry a mobster... I don't want to be involved with dirty money! A corrupt copper..."

He chuckles softly, rubbing his thumb over your untainted cheek. "You should be thanking me, Doll... That dirty money? Been putting a roof over your head for three years. Corrupt copper? Well, he even had the decency to have the safety on his gun while pointing it at your pretty head. Mobster? Willing to put a ring on your finger and give you a nice home."

The tears start free falling as your situation fully sinks in. There really is no way out. You'll end up in the ground if you don't let him put a ring on it.

"So, I'll say it again," he grips the back of your neck, squeezing ever so slightly, "you should be thankin' me."

"T-thank you."

"Attagirl," he lets go of you completely, letting you fall back to the floor, "now eat."

❦

He let you be that night, and you didn't see him the next morning either. It was Seonghwa who came to the door, and you didn't know if you should feel relieved or not.

"Hey, Miss," He spoke softly, staying just outside of the doorway. "I heard what happened... I'm sorry."

He seemed genuine enough. You sat down your hairbrush and turned on the small stool. Your eyes puffy and red from the lifetimes worth of crying you did last night.

"Uhm, so San wants us to go to town and pick out some fabrics for your weddin' gown. If you aren't up for it, I can pick them out myself."

"Will he be going with us?"

"No, just you and I."

You were sick and tired of smelling San every time you tried to take a deep breath, and that's how you ended up here.

It's less overwhelming than being in that farmhouse that seems to be your prison for now and for forever to come. But overwhelming nonetheless.

Hwa is talkative. But you don't mind. He treats you well. Like an equal. He doesn't talk down to you like many men do. And that, you very much appreciate.

He tells you of how he feels it's unfair you have no saying in your future, his heart is heavy with sadness that he cannot help you. And he tells that to your face. He will not help you. He is loyal to San. But that doesn't mean you can't be friends.

You seem to share life stories with one another the entire car ride there. And then he already feels like an old friend as he holds up fabrics to your skin to see which compliments you best. You, admittedly, aren't as into it as he is. As much as a bride should be. But then, how could you when you were picking things out for the day that would solidify your future with a mobster?

You both settle on one that, you will admit, made your heart flutter when you imagined yourself in. And then you're on your way, but Seonghwa stops the vehicle halfway through town.

"What are we doing?" You look out of the window and your heart stops in your chest as you see that he's parked infront of the police station. "No, Hwa! You promised I wouldn't have to see him."

"I'm sorry, Miss (Y/n)... he said he wanted to see what you picked afterwards. It will be quick."

You take a few deep breaths without San's cologne smothering you, then you swing the door open and follow after Hwa.

Sans broad shoulders aren't hard to pinpoint in the semi-packed station. "Ah, my beautiful fiancée!" He perks up immediately as he spots you and his friend.

What he does next absolutely floors you.

He cups both of your cheeks, and kisses you deeply. Right out in the open. Hot lips on yours.

You grip his wrists, face flushed with heat as he pulls away, bending down slightly to rest his forehead on yours. "Did you pick a pretty fabric for our special day?"

The look in his eyes seems almost innocent from far away. He's already got everyone in the room convinced that you're a willing participant of this relationship. But you, up close and personal, can see the glint of silent threats in his eyes- telling you to keep up the act or face the consequences.

"Uhm, uh-huh," you move slight to the side and look to Hwa, who's head is down slightly for a spilt second before he smiles at you and San and holds out the roll of fabric.

"Oh, Doll, what a good choice! No doubt you will look jaw-dropping," he runs his fingers over the fabric, imaging the pure beauty that you will be. "You'll make it extra good, right, Hwa? Only the best for my girl."

" 'Course, San. We're gonna work on some sketches when we get home." His smile is genuine, like he looks forward to it.

"Officer Choi! Hate to interrupt but we got a hold-em-up at the bank," another officer passes in a hurry, stopping briefly to congratulate you both.

"Ah," he clicks his tongue, rubbing his hands on your side gently, "wish me luck?"

"Good luck..." He looks like he's waiting for more. You gulp and force a smile, almost gagging on the words you conjure up, "good luck, Baby."

❦

The days after that first one passed almost like groundhog day. You awoke with San nearly laid ontop of you. Bathed and made breakfast. Worked with Hwa on your gown until it was completed. Walked around the farm and conversed with the farm-hand. Cooked and had a semi-awkward dinner with the three of them. Talked and became closer with San, slowly becoming happier with your situation.

And then all too suddenly...

It's two days short of three weeks since you've been 'brought home', as San likes to say. Which means one very big thing.

You are to be married.

It's a small affair, but beautiful nonetheless.

You can quickly tell that only one side of San's life is invited. There is not a badge to be seen as you peer out of the window, only gangster after gangster taking their seat.

Hwa finishes buttoning up your gown and steps back, smiling at you like a proud family member. "Ready, Miss?"

"Ready as I'll ever be."

Hwa walks you down the aisle.

And then it's a blur.

How did your get back in your bedroom? Was the ceremony already over?

It seems to have happened in a flash.

You stand infront of the window again. All of the guests have either left or have taken up in one of the many guest rooms in the home. San no doubt offered them up so that he could have witness to what was about to happen.

Your wedding night. Oh, how special and magical a day.

San slides his hands up your back, landing on your tall collar and skillfully unbuttoning it. Slowly, almost teasingly. His words send a shiver down your spine, they set your hairs on edge: "you are so beautiful, my Dear... it took everything in me not to take you right there in the aisle. I've never wanted anyone, or anything, as badly as I want you."

Your breath hitches in your throat as his soft lips come in contact with your now exposed neck. It not the first time he's left adoring kisses on your body. But somehow it feels different as husband and wife. "San..."

"Yes, Doll?"

"I... I'm a virgin."

"I know, Doll. Tell me to stop and I shall, but... I want to make you feel good like only a husband can. I want to show you my love in physical form." His hands slide into the now open back of your dress, around to your breasts. "Only I can touch you. Only you can touch me. Do you understand that?"

A breathless 'yes' trembles out of your lips as he cups your bosom. The little moan that follows has his hard member throbbing, so ready to finally claim you. He presses it to the round of your ass, and you have to hold back a gasp, simply letting your mouth gape as you look out at the dark night sky. But when his calloused finger tips roll over your hardened nipples, you can't bite back the curse of pleasure that bubbles in your throat.

"Oh, you poor bunny," he whispers in your ear, "you have no idea what you've gotten yourself into." The warmth of him slowly dissipates, and the tell-tale sound of the stool in the room dragging on the floor makes you turn around. "Drop your gown, let me see my wife in her full glory."

Heat burns on your cheeks, of embarrassment or arousal you can't quite tell at the moment. He's shed his fanciest uniform jacket and is now working on his button up, his cock straining against his slacks.

"You ever seen a man's prick?" He smirks as he catches you staring. Your eyes don't leave his lap as you take off your white kitten heels. That is, until he calls you out.

"No," your eyes drop to the ground as you neatly arrange your shoes, "never..."

"Mine will be the first? Mm, first and only," he half hazardly tosses his shirt, leaving his chest bare. Scars and toned muscle on full display for you. "Catch up, Dollface."

You step out of your gown carefully, holding it to your chest to hide yourself. "What if I'm not... pretty enough?"

"Oh, my wife can't possibly disappoint. I've seen that silhouette while you shower." He tilts his head and smiles, a soft smile. "You'll be my first as well."

You swear your eyes have bugged out of your head the way he chuckles at your expression. "Really?"

He stands, gently unraveling your fingers tight grip on the white fabrics. "Really, and I don't want to wait any longer. I want it to be with you. It will be with you." You let him take the fabric, and he drapes it on the stool carefully without ever taking his eyes off of you.

"W-what about the skins in our drawer?"

"So I don't make a mess while I fuck myself thinking about all of the dirty things I want to do with my wife."

"Oh-" You swear you're running a fever. You've never felt this way before- but then, you imagine you'll be feeling many firsts tonight.

"Would you like to hear about them?" He grins, his signature shit-eating-grin, as he guides your hands to his belt. You fiddle with it with a small nod, slowly pulling it off of him as he speaks. "I've got you laid down on our bed, legs spread..." You unbutton his slacks. "Touching, exploring what's mine." His zipper is undone next. "I take my time, make you nice and wet." His bottoms are gone. "I hold your hands." His boxers go after them. "And then I fuck you on my cock."

And he did exactly that. That's how you got here.

Hours of teasing later, his member is finally buried inside of you, stretching you like your fingers never could. He interlocks his fingers with yours as his hips withdrawn. Squeezes your hands tightly as he slowly sinks back in.

"Oh God," you whisper, heels digging into the mattress as you arch beneath his built frame, "ah, Sannie."

His hips stutter, mind overheating as the nickname reaches him. You feel... oh, you feel amazing. Like heaven on Earth. Your gummy, warm walls suck him in, so wet and inviting. He wants to bury himself in your cunt and never leave. "Fuck, Bunny, you feel fucking godly."

Only a moan is his response, your head tossed to the side in embarrassment. "D-don't stop," you pant, squeezing his hands tighter as you gather the courage to- "please go faster." Oh, nevermind. Your mind has left and only your pussy's logic remains. And it's logic is- "Sannie, faster!"

His thick, veiny shaft feels otherworldly as it drags against you. You need more. And he is happy to oblige. He quickens his pace, keeping his strokes languid and tender so as not to hurt you. But by God, he goes faster.

"Ah! Ah, my God!" You cry into the night, uncaring as your pleasure echoes in the houses thin walls.

Your noises, your facial expressions, your divine warmth around him. San feels that familiar coil tighten quickly, winding up. "Fuck, (Y/n), I'm gonna bust," he bites his lip, a loud moan vibrating his chest.

"C-close, I'm close, Sannie," you squeeze his fingers in yours, looking up beggingly, "please don't stop, ah- ah! Just like that! Nngh!" Your eyes roll back into your head, cunt clenching down on him like a vice, a gush of heat tells him you've just came around him, so he no longer holds back.

He hooks one of his legs around yours and pushes himself deeper than before, making you yell out in overstimulated ecstasy. And that primal yelp as he buries himself as deep as possible sends him over the edge, coil in his gut not only snapping- but burning to ash as he fills your womb with his release. "Fuck, fuck," he whines, rutting into you unable to move as your core clenches more than ever, refusing to let him go. "Mine," he growls out, leaning down and colliding his lips with yours passionately.

Your body goes limp beneath him, your soft breaths fanning against his sweaty face as he pulls away from the kiss. He wraps his arms around your waist tightly and your jelly like arms wrap around his broad shoulders. "Mine, all fuckin' mine," he lowers his weight onto you slowly, and it makes his hard cock feel heavier than before. He ignores your whiny moans, resting his head on your chest. "My wife, filled with my seed. Mine, mine, mine," with each of his possessive proclamations comes a thrust of his hips. "Say it, say you're mine."

"I'm yours," you whimper under his weight, blissed out beyond belief and in shock that -despite having filled you less than five minutes ago- he is already rock hard again and thrusting into you, slowly building his speed back up.

"Louder," he demands, head pressed firmly to your chest and listening intently to your drumming heart beat.

"I'm yours," you speak more confidently.

"Louder," his pace has passed where you reached before, he's nearly drilling you with his cock.

"Ah! Fuck!" You screech, nails digging into his skin, legs wrapping around his wildly thrusting hips instinctively.

"Say it," his voice rumbles on your chest, sending vibrations through you as his thrust shake the bed, "fucking say it, tell everyone who you belong to."

"I'm yours, San! Oh! San! Sannie! Baby!" Your brain has shut down, you're putty in his arms, babbling loudly. "Cumming!" You can't help but announce it to the farm, your pleasure has set you ablaze and everything is pointless besides San.

He follows shortly after, his second release flooding your stretched walls and pushing his first out, making a mess of your sheets and pelvises.

When he doesn't show any sign of slowing, you slap his shoulders repeatedly and let out a loud whine. He stills deep inside of you and pants into your chest, cock still throbbing inside of you.

He's become insatiable.

"Break, please," you slur, hands finding purchase in his disheveled hair. He melts into the drunken affection, eyes peering up at you with love and adoration... obsession in the comfort of your own home.

He slowly pulls out of you, watching in awe as the pearly white of his love seeps out of you. He rubs your thighs in a soothing manner, taking a moment to catch his own breath.

"D...do you feel good?" He looks up, almost like a lost puppy. You've never seen him so vulnerable.

"God, yes," you smile at him dopily, propping yourself up on your elbows with a groan. He sits back, immediately locking his arms around you and pulling you into his lap. His scent blankets you, and you welcome it. Taking a deep breath.

His member is messy with a mix of your juices, resting against your lower belly like it knows that's where it belongs. Showing you both how deep he reaches.

The sight alone lights the fire in you again, now just as insatiable as he is.

"I love you." The words that slip past your swollen lips shock the both of you, eyes meeting in an instant.

The crickets outside chirp their song, stars and moon casting light through the window. A shooting star flies by.

"I love you."

❦

There's a knock at the door. Strange. Anyone who needs in can get in. You trot down the stairs and stop halfway as your eyes meet your brothers through the screen door. "Bub?" You nearly trip over your feet as you jump down the rest of the steps, slinging the door open and wrapping your arms around him tightly. It been long past those three weeks San have him. Almost a year past.

"Bub! Bubby!" He spins you around in his arms, nearly falling off of the porch.

"Oh, thank God! You're alive!" Both of you have wide smiles, blissfully unaware as San turns the corner in his farming overalls. "Let's get a wiggle on, before Mr.Choi knows I'm here." San stops in his tracks, eyes trained on you.

"Oh... Bub."

"Let's get, c'mon." He goes to drag you by your arm to the awaiting car.

"Stop! I'm not going with you."

A smirk grows on Sans as a frown grows on your brothers. "N-not going? Don't be silly!"

"Let go of me," you slap his hand away and when your hand falls back to your side, that's when he sees it.

Your belly. Swollen with child.

"(Y/n)..."

You wrap your hands around your stomach protectively as his concerned look turns to a glare. "D-did he rape you? Dear Lord," his hand flies to his mouth in shock.

"What!? No, no, nothing of the sort. San and-"

"Hurry, before he gets back."

"Before who gets back?" San grins wide as he joins your side, wrapping his arm around you and purposefully showing off the ring on his finger. "Long time, no see... Bub."

His face so that of a ghost, backing away until he hits Hwa, who forces him to kneel.

"You really left your poor helpless sister for dead?" The words that San speaks knocks the reality back into you. He did leave you. You'd been so happy with your new life that you'd forgotten entirely about what lead up to it. "I doubt you've even got my cash, huh?"

"Mister, please! Surely you've forgiven me?"

"I don't hold grudges... my wife is a different story, however." He turns to you with an innocent smile. "Honey?"

"Sissy... Tell me you didn't."

"I did." You dead pan. "You left me!" You land a slap harshly across his cheek. "Bastard!"

"Alright, Miss, don't put too much stress on the baby-" Hwa tries to calm you, but you've already gone off the deep end after being reminded of your life before San.

"I hate you!! You left me all alone! You threw me to the wolves! Where were you?!"

"Sis, just- just come home, you aren't thinking straight."

The cicada chirp loudly, nearly drowning out your next words.

"This is home. This is all I have. This is all I want."

"Sis, what has he-" Tears are welling up in your brothers eyes. And it pisses you off.

"I hate you! I never want to see you again, I hate your coward guts!"

San squeezes your shoulder gently and it brings you back to reality. Your brother is shaking as all of the realizations come crashing down on him. Hwa knows what's about to happen, he and San have talked about it a million times. He takes the gun from his belt and hands it over.

"My Moll has spoken."

Bang.

❦

#ateez #ateez smut #ateez au #ateez fic #choi san smau #choi san x reader #choi san #choi san smut #smut fic

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topherwrites · 3 months

Text

SNOWFLAKES IN MY STOMACH WHEN WE'RE KISSING

summary - spending the holidays with jake's family isn't always smooth sailing, but little else matters when you're grossly in love. (also - jake dresses up as santa for his nieces and nephews, you're real into it.) pairing - jake seresin x (fem!)reader word count - 2.7k rating - nsfw content, 18+, mdni! content warnings & tags - no use of (y/n) / mostly fluff / jake being super in love / jake's family celebrates christmas / very brief angst / me being incapable of giving jake a good childhood / brief mention of childhood abuse / swearing / alcohol consumption / dash of smut / fingering / lmk if i missed anything! a/n: a little belated christmas one shot for you all. reblogs, comments, and likes super appreciated! TOP GUN MASTERLIST / LIBRARY BLOG

Heat audibly blasts through the vents, the entire house sweltering. A solid summer day indoors. His mother won’t even let anyone touch the thermostat. In her defense, she grew up without a lick of snow on the ground and now it’s fifteen degrees in December, a real white Christmas.

Which isn’t exactly ideal for Jake considering he��s been roped into wearing a Santa suit for his young nieces and nephews. The suit is all red polyester—the least breathable material known to man—and thick faux fur cuffs. It’s causing him to start perspiring where sweat simply shouldn't be, his white undershirt clinging to his back and his crack.

“It’s too goddamn hot in this thing.”

Unbuttoning the jacket, he airs it out, the relief near immediate.

Over his shoulder, he catches sight of you lounging on the guest bed—the one his mother oddly insisted that you could share—odd because that’s been a hard and fast rule for all the non-married seresin kids since his older sister began dating.

When she’d pointed him to the room, he’d paused, waiting for her to tell him which room would be yours, separately. Exactly like the sole previous time a girlfriend had stayed the night, way back in college, he figured you’d be placed in the room past his parents so no premarital shenanigans would occur. When that moment didn’t come, he’d stood there stupefied till you bumped his hip, nodding in the direction of the room.

Then he found out that with his brother and sister, their spouses and kids, and a few stray cousins and aunts staying, every other room was already occupied tenfold when he showed up with you in tow.

He wasn’t sure if he would actually come down until a few days before, on the fence about spending so much time packed together with his family. But you’d volunteered to go along with him, meeting everyone besides his mother for the first time. Offering yourself up as a buffer.

It gives him pause less and less, just how much you care about him. Warmth spreads through him at the memory.

He was thankful that you had a bunch of airline credit banked, otherwise booking so late during the peak holiday season flights would’ve cost an arm and a leg.

Your feet kick back and forth as your eyes drag up his back, not put off in the slightest by his melting-like-frosty-the-snowman state, meeting his gaze with a heat you don’t attempt to hide. His irritation at the outfit dispels at your attention, melting away into something far sweeter.

“Is this doing it for you?”

“Oh,” your voice strained, “yeah, absolutely.”

And while there’s a bit of humor to the whole situation, what with the whole ‘being dressed as Old Saint Nick’ thing, your attraction to him isn’t a joke in the slightest. Sweaty, sunburned, exhausted. You seem to take a liking to any form Jake comes in.

You continue, twirling your finger in a slow, instructive circle, humor alighting in your eyes, “Do a little twirl for me, baby.”

He laughs but gives in to your borderline indecent direction, turning steadily on his heel. He does a slow three-sixty, letting the jacket fall to his waist so your eyes can freely roam. Turning back to you, he takes you in the sight of you before he closes the gap, crawling over you to give you a kiss.

Things are so simple with you, you never make him work for your affection, it’s always present, even in your teasing. He doesn’t feel that pang of being inadequate that his father instilled in him when he was young—the pang that he let drive him for far too long into his adulthood. He can breathe right around you, loosen his tongue, soften his words. He can be a good man, not just a good pilot.

He loves you. You love him. Everything is right in the world.

────────────────────────

The kids love the whole theatrics of him dressing up like Santa, faux beard, and all. He answers their inquiries into whether or not he’s their uncle Jake with a falsely grandiose tone, handing them their presents—you’re not sure if they fully buy into it, but they all seem to be having fun.

Sipping on a mug of coffee, warm in your palms, you watch him from afar as he juggles holding two of his nieces, one dangling off of his arm like it's a monkey bar and the other calmly being held on his hip.

Ainsley and Avery—without judgment, you wonder what the reasoning is to name all your kids with the same first letter, like Pokemon evolutions.

“He’s always been good with them. Kids.”

Ah, the dreaded (potential) future mother-in-law ambushing you about kids part of the day. You had that penciled in for sometime around… now, generally. You look over at her. She looks back at you with a familiar glint in her eye. God, Jake looks just like her, same straight nose and dimpled smile and hooded eyes.

Mae doesn’t mean any ill will. You’re aware. But it all still settles ominously on your shoulders. The breadth of the unknown, what the future could hold, kids or not—whether or not you and Jake will even get that far, you hope so.

You nod slowly, calmly noting, “That’s not surprising.”

You see the way he is with them, how much they adore him. It’s a nice picture. But you're both still undecided on whether that’s one that you want of your own.

She seems to detect that you’re not going to humor her about the subject, dropping it. She looks at your empty mug, “Do you want a refill?”

────────────────────────

You casually gesture to the sprig taped to the doorjamb above you, “Is that what you were up to earlier?”

You note the little red berries, the toothed leaves, and the bush-like appearance.

“Maybe.” With a self-satisfied smile, he shrugs. His large palms grip at your waist, gently pushing you against the doorway.

You scratch at your cheek. “You know that’s not mistletoe, right?”

Holly. It's a frequent mistake, mostly from movies that wanted something to hang with a little more visual pop than actual mistletoe. He sighs, head falling back as he glares up at the traitorous plant. You’d never pass up the chance to poke a little fun at him, but now you want to bring the smile back to his face.

You poke at his side, bringing those pretty green eyes back to you, “But I suppose I can spare a kiss regardless.”

A smile creeps onto his face, warmth clear in his gaze. He leans his weight into you, not enough to crush but enough to let you feel all of him. Tilting his head, his voice drops as he questions, “Oh, will you make an exception? Bend the rules? For little ‘ol me?”

Breathing the same air, his nose nearly brushes yours. Everything but him, every sound and sight is extraneous—it all just turns to static.

You hum in agreement, “For you.” You brush the pads of your fingers along his cheekbone, intentionally gentle, enjoying the way his lashes flutter at the gesture. “Now give me a kiss.”

Like the ever-dutiful soldier he is, he dips his head in assent, “Yes, ma’am.”

He takes the green light, gently molding his mouth to yours.

────────────────────────

His sixteen-year-old nephew, Sam, heckles him across the dinner table, quietly calling him a “fucking simp” as he hands you a refill of eggnog with a quick peck—that becomes two or three at his insistence, his lips chasing yours. His tone isn’t cruel, just an attempt at embarrassing his uncle.

He gets a smack upside the head from his dad—Jake’s older brother, Matt—for the language at the table, quick and sharp. Recycled material from their own childhoods. He tries to suppress the instinctual flinch, annoyance burning in his chest at how years later his heart is still sent racing. Jake wonders if he too, will become like their father. If it’s unavoidable. Something built into him. The apple didn’t fall far from the tree with his brother.

He knows that he has the capacity for cruelty in him and though it doesn't come as quickly these days, he still has to make an active effort to not be a dick sometimes, especially with Bradshaw.

And then, a hand, warm and stabilizing, slides across his thigh, squeezing tenderly. His eyes bounce around the table, everyone pointedly looking at their plates, just like when they were young and his father thought that one of them needed corporal punishment for acting like a kid.

Except for you, whose eyes are focused on Jake with so much understanding that he can’t help but knock his boot into his brothers.

“Don't do that shit.”

A tense moment follows. The clatter of forks stop, drinks pause at lips, and everyone’s eyes plant on him, perplexed that it’s been acknowledged in the slightest. Matt levels a stare back at him, and he wonders if he’s going to hear their dad’s signature line come out of his brother’s mouth—don’t tell me how to discipline my kids—leveled at anyone who ever expressed concern for the way their father treated them, teachers, other parents, their own mom.

His brother is the one to blink first, dropping his eyes down to his plate as he stabs at a piece of asparagus. The festivities resume around them. Quieter.

It’s not a real acknowledgment. But he’s drawn a line in the sand.

Sam continues looking at him for a few more moments. He wonders if his nephew knows just how similar their childhoods were, why his father is the way that he is. Not that it would make it better, but it might help him to know that it’s not him, some fault of his own.

Jake always thought that it was him. He knows a little better now.

────────────────────────

After all the kids have been bundled up in beds and the adults break out the liquor, it doesn't take long for Jake to crash. Sprawled on the couch next to you, his arm draped around your shoulder becomes less of a pleasant weight and more of a log hanging around your neck.

You tap his stomach, softer and less-toned after the holidays—at your insistence that he actually eats some sugar for once and doesn’t, under any circumstances, wake you up at five am during your vacation so he can go for a run. You’re glad that he’s taken the threat seriously, that he’s taking it easy and actually relaxing while you’re here. He grumbles at your touch but barely stirs, about eighty percent tired, twenty-percent drunk.

“Christ, when did he become such a lightweight?” His brother directs his jibe disguised as a question to you.

Rolling your eyes, you sigh, standing up. You pat his thigh, holding your hands out. “Up and at ‘em, lieutenant.”

His eyes peel open at the use of his rank. Blinking awake, he flops his hands into yours, not taking a strong grip. You're thankful for the fact that he barely relies on you to help himself stand, swaying minorly as he does so. You’re not particularly eager to see what’d happen if you had to haul all two hundred pounds of Jake upright on your own.

You both trod up the stairs. His hand caressing the silver tinsel wrapped around the banister as you go, the Christmas lights hung from it setting the staircase in a warm glow. With your arm looped around his waist and his looped around yours, you make slow progress towards the room at the end of the hall.

He toes off his boots as you shut the door to the bedroom, flopping backward onto the bed. Eyes fluttering sleepily, a hint of a smile on his face, he sighs out a breath. Voicing his inner thoughts aloud, his voice is gentle, “I'm so happy.”

The statement settles sweetly in the air.

Taking hold of your hand, he pulls you on top of him. His eyes heavy, he isn’t particularly conscientious about where you’re going to land, so you have to catch yourself before you knee him in the dick. Straddling him, you find your place in his lap. Affection, as it always does, blooms in your chest at the sight of him.

“Are you as happy as I am?” His question is gently curious, none of his old insecurity laced through.

You slowly nod, hands smoothing over his chest as you lean over him. “Yeah, I really am.”

Under your palms, you can feel him huff a pleased sigh.

Large hands land on your thighs, smoothing up and down the bare skin under the hem of your skirt. His eyes roam over your figure, from your legs, your waist, your chest, finally landing on your face, “You look so pretty. Have I told you that?”

Suppressing your smile, you squint as you tilt your head, imitating deep thought. You hum, “Mm, about twenty times today.”

“I think you could stand to hear it one more time.” He sits up on his elbows with surprising swiftness, his nose brushing along your cheek before his lips settle next to your ear, “You are so pretty.”

He pulls back just enough to kiss you, lips gliding softly over yours. He tastes like rum and vanilla. Under you, you feel him grow half hard. It’s one of the things that you never really expected from him, just how needy of a drunk he is.

He slips his tongue into your mouth, large palms squeezing at your hips as he guides you to rock over him. His breaths mingle with your own as he pulls back, panting, “You wet for me?”

Rucking up your skirt past your hips, his hand slips into your underwear and he swipes two fingers through the wetness collected there before you can—for the sake of his sleep schedule—gently turn him down. You fold over him, smothering your moan into his shoulder as he pushes in, his palm immediately harshly grinding against your clit. With your own buzz sliding through your body, you melt into the pleasure, task entirely forgotten.

Burning heat spreads through your core, your cunt clamping down around his fingers. It’s so good—it’s always this way, like he’s read the manual on your body. Slick sounds echo in the otherwise quiet room; your gut twists, high building.

Just as you're about to fall over the edge his movements slow, and the peak he was working you to begins to dissipate. But you're left on the edge as his brain seems to intermittently connect to its previous task, working over your pulsing clit. Your hips kick into his palm, the not quite enough stimulation tortuous. You try to roll off of him, but the arm around your back stays put. He grumbles for a moment. You nearly yelp at a shift of his palm shoots electricity up your spine.

You shake his shoulder, “Jake, Jake.”

“Mm,” he hums, “no, no.” He blinks himself only half-awake, eyes still drooping, “Second wind.”

You reach behind your back, sliding his arm from around you, pressing it to his chest. You draw his hand out from under you, the drag of his fingers sending waves of heat through you. Pressing a kiss under his jaw, you whisper, “Go to sleep.”

Eyes still closed he slides the fingers that were just inside you past his lips, casually cleaning your arousal off them. You have to pretend like that doesn't make your cunt pulse with need. He rolls onto his side, then mumbles into the pillow, “Fine, but I’m going to rock your world in the morning.”

You pat his stomach, placating him—sure that in the morning he’ll remember that he’s surrounded by his parents, siblings, and their offspring, that the walls are a little too thin for what he wants to do to you.

You collapse on the bed beside him, already nodding off.

You're proven wrong in the morning. He sends you over the edge twice with his head trapped between your thighs and his palm sealed over your mouth. And at breakfast, you have to play off the flush he carries as the AC putting out too much heat, smiles barely suppressed.

e/n: thank you for reading!

tagging those who liked the teaser: @mamachasesmayhem @pricelessemotion @sorchathered @dizzybee03 @always-and-forever-at @ofstoriesandstardust @sunlightmurdock @withahappyrefrain @aworldwideapart @shamelessghostwagonwobbler

#jake seresin #jake hangman seresin #jake seresin x reader #jake seresin x you #jake seresin fic #top gun fandom #top gun fanfiction #top gun maverick #top gun maverick fic #my writing

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inthememetime · 2 years

Note

Alfred finds and adopts three homeless teens while the whole of the Batclan is away, the three teens are of course The Fentons. Alfred on the other hand had been dealing with a bit of Empty Nest Syndrome and takes the trio in, so by the time the rest of the Batclan filters back there are three extra people in the Manor but the Fentons deliberately ghost the rest of the residents.

I love this for four reasons:

The potential for Alfred, who wishes Bruce would stop adopting small violent children, realizing that HE is the same.

You can't tell me Alfred, Danny, Dani, and Jazz won't be BFFs. Jazz is the only (mostly) sane person in this house besides him. Dani absolutely WILL spy and report on injuries in exchange for more of that casserole. Danny and Alfred have similar sarcastic wit.

"If we had a nickel for every billionaire with a secret identity we know, we would each have 2 nickels. Which isn't a lot, but weird it happened twice."

The SHENANIGANS!!!!!

Shenanigans include:

At first, Alfred doesn't tell the Batfam because they're a family of detectives. Surely they'll notice. Over time, it becomes a contest of who can make them suspect the most without being found.

Alfred either playing it off or staring with a raised eyebrow when one of the Batfam asks why/if he's talking to himself.

Jazz can only be turned invisible in the nick of time so many times before somebody finds out about her. "It says here, Ms. Fenton, that you have a brother?" "Yes, Danny. He died. But don't worry, he got better!"

When Tim is forbidden caffeine for a week, Danny drinks his coffee super fast or Dani replaces it with chamomile tea with black food coloring.

Dani: "You know Dick, you really shouldn't do that."

Dick, after a moment of panic, realizing there's nothing in the room with him. "....God?"

Dani, realizing how much chaos she can cause: "yeah, that's me! God."

Danny and Dani take turns being human just to walk past open doors. They all look enough alike to Tim, Dick, Damien, and a young Jason in uncertain light that the rest of the fam has to do double takes.

When someone calls Constantine over as a favor, he takes 2 steps into the manner, says no, and RUNS.

"So I've heard the voice of God, and it sounds like a 14-year-old girl."

"....how hard did Bane hit you again?"

"God says Jason is the one who stole your book."

"...right ok."

Bruce decides he's gonna go be Batman while wounded. He snuck out, so Al calls his Secret Ghost Squad.

Batman is repeatedly interrupted (*cough* saved) by 2 OP glowing metas. Constantine will no longer cross Gotham's borders.

Danny: "You need more ectoplasm. You're a growing half-ghost."

Jason: *shoots the wall* "WHAT THE FUCK WHO WAS THAT?!"

Danny: would you believe it was God?

Jason: NO

Jason figures it out first because he's being parented by a dead guy. He actually doesn't mind that much because he gets to visit the GZ

Cass figures out second because she's observant.

Dick figures it out third by spraying 'God' with paint. He then realizes he attacked an invisible creature that can go through walls with no idea how to fight it.

Tim figures it out by deliberately putting salt in his coffee to see what would happen.

Damien finds Cujo. He is Upset that Cujo already has an owner. Danny tells Damien in exchange for Damien to stop yelling insults at him. (Dani calls him Weak for this, and tells Damien 15 minutes later because he thought she was calling HIM weak and had Opinions)

"Oh shit."

Steph bribes the 'house spirits' for prank help, and then tricks them. They tell her out of Respect.

Duke starts talking to himself about star output on his homework, gets stuck, and SpaceBoi helps. Duke's 10 minutes into stars actually being interesting for once before he realizes he's talking to a ghost.

Bruce has been introduced to them by Jazz. Alfred made her after the 4th sleepless night due to researching the surprise metas.

Dani: its cool dude, but now I have to go prank Tim. Bye!

Vlad shows up for a private meeting with Bruce Wayne. The ghosties reveal themselves in order to kick his ass.

Alfred is the only person who can get away with calling Danny 'Daniel' and Dani 'Danielle'. Anyone else has Serious Regrets.

The Joker breaks Alfred's leg in a bombing. He's never seen again. Danny, Dani, and Jazz are a little TOO innocent

#inthememetime #danny phantom au #ask answered #dp x dc #come ask me things!#batfam

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milaisreading · 5 months

Text

🌱🩷: 3rd story for the Christmas series. This will have some cute, platonic fluff

Relationship: Isagi Yoichi x Sister!Yn (platonic) (mentions of romantic Oliver Aiku x Yn)

Warnings: Reader uses she/her.

⚽️Blue Lock belongs to Muneyuki Kaneshiro and Yusuke Nomura ⚽️

🎄Dec 12th🎄

Christmas time in the Isagi household was always a warm and welcoming time. Both parents would always buy the presents they knew both (Y/n) and Yoichi wanted the whole year, and the kids would try their best to do the same in return with the allowance money. For (Y/n) she loved the time she spends with her family. After Yoichi started pursuing football professionally and left Japan to play for a team in Spain, she started looking forward to the holidays where Yoichi would be home for a week or two.

And as for Yoichi, he missed his sister and parents, the daily talks and meals they would share. And well, Christmas was the one thing he looked forward to a lot, and a specific tradition him and (Y/n) had since they were 14-15.

🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️

'I wonder what we will bake this year. Hope it involves chocolate.' Yoichi thought while his dad drove him home from the airport.

"And, how was it in Spain the past few months? We watched the last match you had. I don't know what was happening, but I can see you enjoyed yourself a lot." Issei spoke up, causing Yoichi to look at him with a grin.

"Yep! It was great, the team we played against was tough to crack, but we made it in the end. It was a good way to start off the season. How are you and mom?"

"We have been good. Mom is home, preparing dinner like crazy since Oliver will be joining is this Christmas as well."

"Oh yeah, (Y/n) mentioned it a few nights ago when we talked. Did they arrive yet?"

"Not yet. Their flight had to be delayed because of a storm."

"Oh... I hope they come home soon." Yoichi muttered, a little worried, but he knew everything will be fine.

🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️

Once back home, Isagi and his parents ate the dinner Iyo prepared and Isagi talked about his recent shenanigans and games in Spain. Iyo and Issei would sometimes chime in with a few questions, which Isagi would gladly answer to them. After they finished dinner, Isagi helped his mom pick up the dirty plates, and then went to rummage through the cabinet where the pans and other baking utensils were.

"Yo-chan, what are you looking for?" Iyo raised an eyebrow.

"I am looking for the cookie cutters and cupcake molds sis put away last time she baked. They are still here?" He looked up as his mom nodded her head.

"It is, but isn't it too late to bake? It's nearly 10."

"I want to prepare everything so sis and I can bake once she is home. You know we have been doing that for years."

Iyo smiled as she saw the cheeky grin on Isagi's face. She put away the dishes and walked over to where he was.

"Wait, I pit them far back. Let me look for them." Iyo said as the boy moved away so that his mom could look for the items.

"Do you know what you will bake this year?"

"Mhm! Sis and I have been sending recipes for some chocolate cookies back and forth." He answered, taking the baking items from his mom's hands.

"That's good to hear! I wonder when they will come... Issei, did (Y/n) call yet?"

Both Isagi and his mom looked over at the entrance of the kitchen, hearing the man's footsteps come closer to the room.

"She texted me a minute ago. Because of the storm, they had to land in Osaka. (Y/n) said her and Oliver will sleep in a hotel tonight and drive to Saitama tomorrow."

"Is sis ok? The flight wasn't too bad, was it?" Isagi asked in worry.

"No, don't worry. She told me it was just near the end when it became dangerous. (Y/n) and Oliver are fine as far as I could tell."

Isagi, along with his mom, let out a sigh of relief and they continued on with their night as normal. Isagi would from time to time text (Y/n), to check in on how she is doing.

'I hope we have the cocoa powder.'

🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️

Isagi had to admit that one of the best feelings is waking up in his bed, in his home. There was just something comforting about sleeping in after a hard week of work, and that comfort got stronger 100 times when he realized he was back in Saitama. Isagi stayed in his bed for a good 20 minutes after waking up, then got ready for the day.

'It snowed a lot last night.' Isagi mused as he looked out the window in the hallway.

"Is anyone even awake yet?" The boy froze as he heard a familiar male's voice.

"Mom and dad are still asleep, I don't know about Yoichi. He sometimes sleeps in, and sometimes he is up early."

"(Y/n) and Aiku are here already..." Isagi muttered as he quickly walked down the stairs.

"Sis! You are home already?" Isagi wondered as he walked to the living room.

"Ahh! There you are! I thought you were still asleep!" (Y/n) chuckled as Oliver waved at Isagi.

"Sup, dude! When did you come back?"

"Oh? Last night! I am happy you two made it home safe. Was the ride from Osaka good?"

Isagi wondered as he and (Y/n) hugged.

"It was ok. It snowed a lot last night, so I was a little worried we will drive for longer."

"Could have been worse." Oliver yawned, high-fiving Isagi as he let go of (Y/n).

"At least we are home. I saw you already prepared the items we can use for backing." (Y/n) looked over at Isagi, patting his head.

"Yeah, I did last night. Mom helped me find them."

"Alright then! I will go freshen up and change clothes, we can bake then. Ok?"

Isagi nodded his head.

☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄

"Alright! We have everything ready! Yoichi, you mix up the wet ingredients and I will mix up the dry ones and prepare the molds and oven." The boy nodded his head and took the items needed as (Y/n) started doing her part.

"Sure! By the way, how is it in Italy? I know we talk a lot about it, but..." Isagi trailed off as (Y/n) took out the mixer.

"It's been great. But, I do get anxious at times when I have to speak Italian. I am not all that fluent yet." She laughed a little while mixing.

"What about you? Are you enjoying your life in Spain?"

Isagi smiled and nodded his head.

"Yeah! Everyone is very nice and the older teammates are willing to help out when we need help. My Spanish is so far... ok-ish. Luna-san says I nailed the accent."

"Good to hear that! You had me worried how you will learn it. You were never all too found in languages. Remember when I tried to teach you English?" She teased the younger while mixing up the dry and wet ingredient, causing Isagi to blush in embarrassment.

"I did my best! Languages are hard!" (Y/n) laughed at his reaction, poking his cheek when she finished mixing.

"Yeah, yeah. You always had football in your head. Anyways, let's shape up the cookies, and then we can move to cupcakes and prepare to decorate them."

Pouting, Isagi nodded his head.

"Meanie~"

"Love you, too."

"Can I join the baking, too? It's kinda boring being all alone-"

"No!"

"Sorry, Oliver. It's a siblings tradition." Yoichi and (Y/n) said at the same time, causing Oliver to pout now.

"You two are so mean to me." Oliver sighed dramatically as Isagi rolled his eyes and (Y/n) laughed.

'Why did I help him even?' The younger thought, turning back to look at his sister.

"It's nice to be reunited again. I really look forward to baking with you."

(Y/n) smiled and ruffle her brother's hair.

"You are adorable! And same, it's really relaxing!"

Isagi enjoyed the winter and Christmas time. It makes him feel comfortable, knowing he was with people he loved during the holidays.

#bllk #blue lock anime #blue lock manga #blue lock x reader #bllk x reader #isagi yoichi #blue lock scenarios #isagi's sister #isagi yoichi x reader #bllk isagi #blue lock isagi #platonic blue lock

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adoristsposts · 10 months

Text

false god | nico hischier

author's note; obsessed w that false god edit of him on tiktok by zegraser like i cannot stop watching it summary; christmas has a set-in-stone tradition: going to mass with your grandfather. but this year you and your boyfriend are coming up with your own traditions. word count; 0.9k warnings; reader isn't religious but her grandpa sure is! characters; Reader x Nico Hischier

When you agreed to spend Christmas with Nico's family in Switzerland, you had no idea the uproar it would cause. Namely with your grandfather. The man was so old that he could rival Mr. Magoo for senile shenanigans. You loved him, but the absolute offence he took to your missing Christmas mass was shocking. "You're breaking the old man's heart." Your mother joked. Your father mumbled something about how in all his years of living, he had never been able to escape his father's demands to go to mass. But being in a different country seemed like a great excuse.

"Baby, you ready?" Nico asked, poking his head into the room. "Yeah. I gotta go, guys. Tell Papa I love him." Your mother grimaced. "He says he's not talking to you right now. But he loves you too." You laughed and told your parents you loved them before hanging up the phone. "Okay. I think I'm ready." "It's not that big a deal," Nico told you for the millionth time. His mother had put the two of you in charge of making the Zimtsterne and Mailänderli. Nico had gone on and on about the importance of making Christmas cookies every year in Switzerland. Now you were a part of the tradition and you were determined to prove yourself. "It is to me, Neeks." You got up and kissed his nose. "Need to get it right so we can make them next year." He smiled and flashed those obnoxiously gorgeous dimples at you. "Fine." He sighed, even though the simple mention of there being a next year for the two of you had his heart fluttering.

You had missed Santa's visit that brought nuts and mandarins, which Nico joked he was devastated about. His two older siblings had already eaten the cookies and chocolates he had brought. He was showing them to you now, as you waited for the cookies to bake. "Nuts and mandarins?" You asked, scrunching your nose up. He laughed, "Not a fan?" "Of nuts, no. I've never had a mandarin." "Try one." He offered, handing one to you. You pursed your lips. "What?" "I feel like we need to do something fun with this." You admitted. "I'm missing my traditions. Let's come up with something new." "I have an idea," Nico said. He took the mandarin from your hands and peeled it open. Expertly, he pulled out two slices and set the rest on the table. "Come on, don't want to give my mother a heart attack." He laced his hand in yours and pulled you into your room. "Nico," You laughed, "What on Earth are we about to do?" He stood facing you and grabbed your other hand lightly, careful not to crush the slices. "We," He took a deep breath like he was preparing, "Are going to put a slice in each of our mouths. And we are going to bite down. And whoever's sprays the most juice gets to eat the chocolate from the advent calendar." "Oh you're on, Hischier." You said, even though it would be all luck. He pulled his hand out of yours and opened it to you, letting you pick your slice. You pursed your lips and pretended you were thinking. In all reality, you didn't really know which one to choose. "This one." You grabbed the one on the left. Nico hummed like he was sure you had made the wrong decision. Both of you placed the slices in your teeth. The juice sprayed a little when you bit down and dripped down onto your chin. You couldn't help your laughter as you watched Nico's do the same. You swallowed what was left of your mandarin slice and wiped the juice off your face. "I think mine was definitely juicier." You reached up to cup his face. "Oh really?" He said. You just hummed against his lips as you pulled him into a kiss. You had to admit, this new tradition was a lot better than listening to some priest preach for hours about things you didn't fully understand.

Later, you and all the Hischiers were still bundled up in your warm clothes from your walk when Nico's mom happily exclaimed, "You should light the Adventskranz!" And you had no clue what she was talking about. "The candles." Nico's older sister laughed, "We light one a week. Usually, we let Neeks do this one, but we like you more." "Hey!" Nico protested at his sister's teasing jab. He wrapped and arm around you and you leaned against his chest. "I'd be happy to." You told them. You weren't sure if the flush of your cheeks was from the warmth of the house or the absolute joy as you felt yourself slotting into their family activities.

That night Nico traced patterns on your hip. He was propped up on his elbow, watching his finger drawing elaborate swirls as you studied his features. "I love it here." You finally told him. His eyes lit up as he looked at you. "Really?" He said excitedly. "Really. It was worth my grandpa's wrath." He laughed at that. "Tell Papa it's my fault." You waved a hand in the air dismissively, "Please, he loves you." "I'm glad." He dropped his head to nuzzle into your neck. "I'm going to marry you someday." You couldn't stop your grin. "Oh, really?" "Yes." He pulled his face up. His hair was falling every which way and you adored it. You adored him. "Just don't propose on Christmas." "Why not? Overdone?" He asked. "No," You said, "My grandpa will never forgive me for taking attention away from Christmas mass."

#adoristsposts #nhl #nico hischier fic #nico hischier fluff #nico hischier x reader #new jersey devils #new jersey devils fic

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randoimago · 11 months

Note

Headcanons of what's like to date (Ace Attorney) Phoenix Wright, Klavier Gavin, Asogi Kazuma, and Herlock Sholmes please?

What It's Like To Date Them

Fandom: Ace Attorney

Character(s): Phoenix Wright, Klavier Gavin, Asogi Kazuma, and Herlock Sholmes

Type of Request: Headcanons

Note(s): The amount of patience S/O will need when it comes to these men istg

Asogi

He almost always has a knowing smile on his face. Like he knows something you don't. It really doesn't help if you have anxiety or if you actually are hiding something from him because he just looks like he knows. And if you ask him about it, you just get a cheeky smile and a, "Whatever do you mean?"

Will drop everything to help you with whatever you need. Even if he thinks it's a bit silly, he won't say anything, just offers his help. Of course, if you say you can do it then he won't push.

He keeps to himself mostly, not really sharing his thoughts on things. But he does check up on you quite often, wanting to make sure you're alright. It's like he's noticing things that he doesn't want to say and instead giving you the opportunity to speak up.

Herlock

Be prepared to constantly be interrupted with whatever you're doing because he needs attention. He really is like an overexcited puppy because look at what he just made! Look at this new case he got and how quickly he solved it!

Lots of sleeping alone at nights. Not because he doesn't want to lay next to you and cuddle, but because the man does NOT sleep. He's always pushing himself and working on something. Don't worry, he has strict "Okay if I take 10 minute to rest now then it gives me an extra 20 minutes for his thing--" That is if he even follows through with the resting.

There are times when you come home and he's in his depressed state. He's moping about something failing and you coming home does make him a bit better, but he really needs someone to listen to him and talk to. Even if you don't quite give him a solution, you can definitely give him ideas that help pull him out of it and suddenly he's back to being a happy puppy.

Klavier

Music is constantly playing. Usually the same genre, but now and then he switches it up for inspiration or because you ask nicely. The volume of the music also changes if he's trying to work or if you think it's too loud/soft. But music is always playing.

Likewise, get used to hearing him practicing guitar. Sometimes he's just strumming a tune that got stuck in his head, sometimes he sees you and gives a teasing smile before going into some improv for a super cheesy love song, and sometimes he is tearing his hair out because he cannot figure out how to write a certain song and it's just angry grumbling.

Despite the fact that Klavier tries to seem rather easy-going, there are moments that only you get to see where he needs you to hold him and just be there for him. Between his brother, his band, and the fact that his mentor was killed, well he needs a shoulder to lean on when the thoughts get to be too much.

Phoenix

You can expect quite a few twisted jokes from him. He'll be reading the morning paper and give a hum about someone falling to their death before he retorts, "I would've survived that fall."

Speaking of that, you become a regular at the hospital. They learn your name, give you cheery smiles, and then point you in the direction of Phoenix's room because he is so bad at avoiding being hurt. He promises you that isn't trying to be a mummy with all his bandages, but it's just his luck.

Phoenix really wishes he can have his phone on silent, but with his job that's not possible. So when you two are out on a nice date or relaxing at home, there are many times when it's interrupted by someone needing an attorney. But most of the time the interruptions are from Maya or Athena or one of the people that has pretty much become family. He does his best to be nice with telling them he's busy, but more often than not you get pulled along to whatever shenanigans they've gotten themselves into.

#ace attorney x reader #tgaa x reader #phoenix wright x reader #klavier gavin x reader #asogi kazuma x reader #herlock sholmes x reader

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mixelation · 9 months

Text

brainworms of the day: reborn au con shenanigans

i posted before about tori and kakashi going to a ninja fiction con like a tired older sibling taking his kid sister to a con. and i like the idea of them repeating this, because like. kakashi isn't super into interacting with fandom but he likes merch and he gets a kick out of seeing cosplays, and tori likes company and kakashi is pretty cill when he's not actively being a troll. so cons are like Their Thing and kushina gets very mushy over the idea of them bonding so obviously minato always gives them the time off

anyway i had some thoughts for shenanigans

thought one: minato canonically really likes icha icha and i think he deserves to have some fun. at first i was like "i don't think the hokage gets many vacation days, and surely if he DID take a vacation he'd spend it with his family?" but then i remembered he can teleport. minato takes days off all the time with the idea his assistant will just summon him back if there's a problem. he shows up unannounced in a pair of sunglasses

minato: i'm incognito :)

random passerby: the fourth hokage and hatake kakashi group cosplay? this place gets less and less original every year

kakashi and tori are unsure of this addition to their group because this is Their Thing. kakashi gets over it pretty quick because he does like getting casual time to hang out with minato, actually, but tori is annoyed because first of all. how is she supposed to behave normally* if her boss is here. secondly now everyone keeps asking her why SHE'S not in matching cosplay.

minato: do you want my cloak? lotta people in cloaks

tori: NO I DON'T, ACTUALLY

*everyone who knows tori would like to point out that the only change in her behavior is a 15% reduction in swearing.

anyway i am getting a kick out of imagining actual hokage and infamous ninja namikaze minato waiting in the same-day registration line. squatting in a two hour line to get into one of the big panels. taking photos with other minato cosplayers. holding back tears because there's a fourteen year old kakashi cosplayer with a sERVICE DOG ALSO IN COSTUME!!!!!!!!

thought two: sasori crashes a con because he wants to pass on intel about orochimaru or soemthing

tori: oh my god WHY are you HERE

sasori: because you're closer than deidara >:(

tori: no i mean, in public? in the crowded dealER'S ROOM?

sasori: who's going to notice?

(a group of sasoris in ugly wigs pass by)

anyway the true shenanigan-y part of this is that initially kakashi thinks a weird 25 year old man is chatting tori up. which like. yes? technically true? but kakashi thinks this is just tori falling for the wiles of a hot cosplayer and that he needs to intervene immediately because she's FIFTEEN, you PERVERT--

kakashi: hi :) who's this :)

tori, feeling her spirit leave her body: he likes my sasori fic

sasori:

sasori, in pain: yup. i. do. that's what this is.

kakashi: oh :) how nice :) then i'm sure you won't mind me standing here while you chat :) sharpening my kunai which are totally just props :)

thought three: i think in her later teens/early twenties, tori starts falling back on I HAVE A BOYFRIEND really frequently to get out of conversations. like in theory the card is for "a guy is hitting on me" but she'll also play it for "someone is talking to me and i don't want them to be."

in konoha this strategy works because even if you were just telling her the cafe is closing in five minutes, "but i'm waiting for my boyfriend, uchiha itachi :(" is enough to give this random poor employee pause. these words have meaning in konoha. however i think there's some Shenanigans to be had for her doing this without thinking about it at a con where context is very different.

man she's trapped with bc they're in line and he won't stop trying to get her to give him her room number: boyfriend? prove it.

tori, exasperated: (pulls out a photo she keeps on her)

man:

man: that's uchiha itachi

tori: exactly

man: .....you honestly expect me to believe that? you clearly just have that on you because you're a fan

tori: .....fuck

for bonus shenanigans repeat a similar exchange but it's at a kitty girl stabby ninja con so itachi is there and immediately wonders up afterwards with like. cat ears on.

man: (eyes darting back and forth between the photo and itachi himself, terrified)

itachi: the food options weren't great but i brought you some bread. did the line move?

man: (now looking around to see if anyone ELSE has noticed this)

tori, very blatantly taking his hand: no they just made us rearrange to stop blocking the hallway

itachi: i see

man: (FLEES THE LINE)

thought four: something cute

i don't want tori to be as well known as deidara/itachi in civilian circles, mostly because it'd be funny. but also i don't think she's as flashy as them and a lot of the stuff she does relies on her not being recognizable. and i like the humor of interacting with itachi/deidara stans and cosplayer who just don't recognize her. so there isn't much in the way of tori cosplay/fic/etc even when she's older and has her own Reputation among actual ninja. but okay. imagine. at the ONE con tori can't make there's a lone tori cosplayer. she's sort of haunting the place-- obviously socially awkward and shy. kakashi loses his mind. he summons minato. minato brings kushina. they bother this girl for like hours and low-key make her day even though it's also kind of scary?

kushina has to physically hold tori back from stalking her after she sees the photos. SHE'S JUST GOING TO BREAK INTO HER HOME AND SEE WHAT FANFICTION SHE'S READING NOTHING VIOLENT OR SCARY--

#reborn au

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gabigabigabby · 11 months

Text

headcanons | brazil national team

seleção brasileira x fem!reader

headcanons of other countries; portugal / england / argentina

a/n: i've always imagined how it'd be like to be friends with these guys. their group must be so much fun to be with. comfort national team ): lmk if you want a part two with the rest of the brazil guys! hope u enjoy ⭐️

synopsis: headcanons of the seleção brasileira during the world cup 🏆

—

neymar

u and ney met for the first time at the brazil world cup

u had been a fan of his since his glory days in santos and his starting years in barcelona

through ney, u got to know the brazil legends

say ricardo kaká, say phil coutinho, say roberto firmino; say literally any brazil player, u have met them before

no one would dare to touch u because ur ney's friend

that's how powerful he is

he always offers to take u out with brazil during the international break

after training, ney insists u and the guys play a friendly game

u could pick out ur team and all, it's very cute (in my head)

he makes sure u get the best seats to watch the game

he invites u to squad dinner after every game brazil had under their campaign

overall, he's just a really amazing dude

it's a blast to get to hang out w him

richarlison

besides u and neymar, richarlison is the other dude ur attached at the hip w

u think he's the funniest guy you've ever met

and he thinks ur the prettiest girl he's ever known

u helped him dye his hair platinum blonde for the world cup

yep it was u

he gave u the shirt he wore on the very first match of brazil's campaign

and u wore that shirt every time brazil had to square up until their loss against croatia

i feel like richy is the kind to invite u to his hotel room so he could get a shit ton of room service

kinda weird. but it's actually kinda cute

he would make jokes solely bc he wants to hear ur laugh

if u don't laugh at his jokes, he literally dies inside

he's pretty overprotective

more overprotective than neymar, i'd say

he'd always have his arm around u

his height also intimidates a lot of people so it helps

he just overall cares so damn much about u

amazing guy

vinicius jr

vini's the kind to tolerate everyone's bs

he kinda just laughs at the squad's antics

trust me, the guys are all weird in their own ways

vini's the neutral guy

he's weird

but then again, he isn't

tbh w u, he's only weird when rodrygo's around

every time u would come visit him and rodrygo and eder, he brings along his nephew to the bernabéu

his nephew loooooves u

bc of vini, u have every real madrid kit u could think of

u have his, rodrygo's, eder's, even benzema's

awesome dude, he cares a lot about his friends

ur lucky to be friends w vini

lucas paquetá

okay i lied

u think lucas is the funniest guy in the seleção

don't tell richy

only u would tolerate his antics

every time one of the guys get paired up with lucas on the plane, they'd ask if they could switch w u

bc only u could match w his shenanigans

his wife n kids LOVE u

i cannot stress that enough

they see u as family

tia y/n

u love benício and filippo the same

but pippinho's ur favorite, ur not fooling anybody

richy joins u guys sometimes

he's the same amount of crazy, not to worry

u and lucas would brainstorm different dance celebrations

u were the mastermind behind his celebration after his goal against south korea

u and lucas would send each other tiktoks every day

whether it be dance related or just mad dumb shit

u appreciate having lucas in ur life

u have always wanted a best friend like him

and now that u do, u never want to let him go

antony

u and antony are very parent-like to one another

u both are around the same age

antony being a few months older than u

he wouldn't live it down

"eu sou mais velho que você, respeite os mais velhos, y/n" [i'm older than you, respect your elder, y/n]

"então você admite que tá velho" [so you admit you're old]

u would joke w him ALL. THE. TIME.

"eu apoio todos os clubes, exceto o manchester united. porque você tá nele" [i support all clubs except manchester united. bc you're in it]

"okay, agora isso é apenas maldade, y/n" [okay, now that's just mean, y/n]

all jokes aside, he'd go livid if anybody ever hurts you

physically, mentally, all that shit

he cares so much

his heart is so huge

he wears it on his sleeve

and he's proud of it

#brazil #selecao #brasil #brazil national football team #neymar #richarlison #antony #gabriel jesus #lucas paqueta #thiago silva #gabriel martinelli #vinicius jr #rodrygo #Spotify

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laenordeservedbetter · 2 years

Text

Everything Has Changed — Rhaenyra Targaryen x GN!Reader

Summary: When Viserys urges Rhaenyra to marry, the princess storms off to her only place of sanctuary, where you comfort her.

Words: 1k

Pairing: Rhaenyra Targaryen x Gender Neutral Reader

Warnings: Arranged marriage at the end (full circle moment or nah? I don't know), sad Rhaenyra (If I missed anything else, lmk!)

I'm posting this here because my other account isn't showing up in the tags. I have no idea why. This was a request by an anon. This fic can also be found in my other acc!!

not my gif.

—

“—and I have given you my answer, Father! I do not wish to be married off to some lord!” was the angry reply of Rhaenyra. As her sworn sword, standing outside the entrance at all times in case someone seeks to hurt her came with the job. You can feel the vibration coming from Rhaenyra shuffling her feet, pacing around the room as if that will help her prove a point to her father. Given the King’s opinion on the subject, you believe he will not change it for Rhaenyra’s own desires. Viserys can be merciless if the situation requires it.

Viserys makes a movement with both his hands to show his irritation, both of their voices growing higher and higher. Any attempts of warding away eavesdroppers will be nugatory. “EVEN I DO NOT EXIST ABOVE TRADITION AND DUTY, RHAENYRA!”

Rhaenyra wavered. Her father ne’er spoke to her this way. It was another sharp cue that everything has changed. No longer would her father wave off her shenanigans or flash a proud smile her way as she defies his orders. She became his political headache. That’s all he sees her as these previous fortnights. So she storms out of the room, not wanting to bid a proper farewell. She would show him. Rhaenyra would show him that she will make a new order of things. Wait and see, father. Wait and see.

You were not given time to blink when Rhaenyra ran by, only giving a nod in your direction. “Princess Rhaenyra!” You cried out, shoving past your fellow guards who make no attempt to join you in following the princess, making you curse them under your breath along with whoever brought them here. They don’t do their jobs correctly. The only reason they’re stationed in the castle is because of their names. If they weren’t born in such families, they’d have to work as hard as you. To your dismay, ranting won’t get you anywhere; much less change the decree that they will have a higher station. Rhaenyra is the priority here. You cannot allow yourself to get distracted.

“Stop following me, Y/n!”

“It is my duty, Princess! You’re my responsibility!”

In the end, you lost sight of Rhaenyra. With your weighty armor hindering your ability to catch up, you had to skid to a stop. “Where are you, Rhaenyra?” You remove the helmet from your head, propping the metal against the wall. If a thief were to stumble upon it, there would be nothing you can do. You’re willing to take that possibility, however, if it meant boosting your odds of becoming quick enough to pursue the crown princess should she cross your line of sight.

There is a solitary sanctuary that Rhaenyra might be in. This hunch is the greatest theory you have. Besides that, you could not possibly take another guess on Rhaenyra’s whereabouts. You set off to the direction of the Weirwood tree, keeping yourself on high alert.

You were correct in your assumptions.

Rhaenyra sat underneath the tree, eyes puffy and red like the fire Syrax would exhale, except it was much darker. She sees your shadow approaching and sighs.

“Tell me what’s on your mind, hm?” You drop down alongside your lover, cupping her face using your hands gingerly. Rhaenyra places her own hand on top of yours, wordlessly requesting to keep your gentle touch there.

Her eyes close and she holds her breath. “Perhaps my father wouldn’t pressure me for marriage as much if I was born as a son instead. No one respects me because I am not a boy.”

You shift your hand so you could slip it between Rhaenyra’s quivering fingers. Her grip was loose, dissimilar to your firm one. She was half-expecting you to take pity on her. When Rhaenyra sees nothing of the sort, she isn’t sure if she feels relieved or saddened.

“I do, ‘Nyra. I respect you. You are not a son. You are a warrior; everything a ruler should be. It may be the topic of controversy right now, but I know that when you ascend the Iron Throne, you will prove that all the people who doubted you were wrong. It’s only a matter of time, my love. They will see one way or another.”

Most of the internal battle betwixt rationality and the hope inhabiting the princess’s body was put to a stop. Rhaenyra leans her head on your shoulder, unperturbed by the armor still on your body as a result of innumerable instances of her “accidentally” sleeping on your shoulder after a long council meeting. You would try to move her body to her own bed, where she would not wake up with a stiff neck, but she can always tell when you badly attempt at transferring her to the comforts of her silk sheets.

“But that’s not happening today, right?”

You smile sadly, placing a kiss on the top of her head, silver-blonde waves tickling your mouth. “Not today, my love. We can only hope for someday.”

“‘Someday’ is adequate for me.” She said. Rhaenyra has a lot on her mind, but when it comes to you, she has no trouble sharing her thoughts. She wants to tell you everything, ranging from her secrets to the promises she whispers in your ear when she thinks you are asleep. “As long as they are with you, ‘someday’ is bearable. I want you by my side, always.”

“I am your sworn shield, Princess. My order is to stay close by. It would be hard for me to get away from you even if I wanted.” Although you laugh wholeheartedly, it dies in your throat as you see King Viserys in the pathway, staring right at you. You couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe, but you knew you had to protect Rhaenyra.

“Shit.” Rhaenyra tenses. “Father, I –”

You could not let her take the fall for this. “It is my fault, Your Grace. Rhaenyra is innocent. She didn’t do anything wrong. I should not have –”

“Save it.” Viserys says, running his hand through his hair (what is left of it, anyway). I should have known, he scolds himself for not being able to spot it sooner. Yours and Rhaenyra’s lingering gazes were more than just friendly gestures. It was romantic! “Rhaenyra is to wed you by spring’s end.”

What in the seven hells?

#rhaenyra x reader #rhaenyra targaryen x reader #princess rhaenyra #rhaenyra targaryen #viserys targaryen

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royal-ruin · 8 months

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red, white, and royal blue (rwrb) fic recs (part 5)

other rwrb fic recs here other fic recs here personal favorites are starred, by the way. everything is complete unless stated otherwise.

this is probably going to be the last part for now. hope you enjoyed the recs!

*Déjame Ver Cómo Es Que Floreces by 14carrotgold (~12k)

Oscar gets in close and bluntly asks, “Earlier. In the bathroom. Did you do it?” Alex scoffs, “No. Don't be a perv. Why would you wanna know that anyway?” Oscar rolls his eyes. “Mind out of the gutter, chamaco. Did you propose?” Ah. Henry is introduced to the extended Diaz side of the family at their matriarch's birthday. Shenanigans (and romance and feelings) ensue.

oh my god?? a must-read.

what we might do (if we stop keeping a secret) by indomitablelove (~8k)

'This isn't how I wanted to tell people. I thought we'd get the chance to do it right.' - Red, White and Royal Blue, Casey McQuiston, p.327 or, in another world, Alex and Henry get to do it right.

Love is indomitable [Interview] by aceofsapphics (~4k)

„It definitely stays secret until after the election. And I know it’ll be messy. But if we can get ahead of the narrative, wait for the right time and do it on our own terms, I think it could be okay.” Chapter 10, page 283 “In another universe they date long distance for a couple years and then come out with a huge piece in Vanity Fair by Ronan Farrow” – Casey McQuiston, from select annotations from Red, White and Royal Blue, accessed via pagesandpugs.blog OR the coming out Henry and Alex have always deserved and always will.

i cannot fall in love (with you) by orionseye (~22k)

"One of the many nights it’s kept her up, she imagined taking the romcom approach to this. In some alternate reality, June gives Nora the grandeur she deserves. And it’s Jane Austen worthy, it’s glitter-in-your-hair, fireworks-in-the-sky, friends-to-lovers bullshit. She’d confess, obviously. Maybe there’s a boombox involved. Maybe it’s pouring rain. The setting doesn’t matter, really, because they’re both there." even after alex and henry get their happily ever after, there's still a story left to tell. when an ironic new year’s kiss turns triggers something much more, june finds herself stuck in a messy situation. can she find the line between her personal life and her public one? what does it mean to love someone in secret? can she ever find the guts to show it? the nora x june rwrb sequel we are all dying for

the summary said it perfectly. june's pov had me reading around the tears in my eyes.

Heaven is You by cmere (~2k)

Alex stirs. Henry trails his hand down Alex's chest, nuzzles into his neck. A low, soft noise escapes Alex's mouth; he pushes back against Henry's hips, and Henry echoes it with a noise of his own. His mind is slowly awakening, catching up to the instinctual responses of his body. His eyes cast over the two of them, tangled up under the blankets and bathed in light. Suddenly, all the implications of what the bright sunlight means—shades thrown wide open, snipers on top of buildings, long-range lenses shooting them in their most private moments—sends icy bullets through his chest. Several years later, Henry is still working through the trauma of their forced outing. Alex helps him.

Room 1071 by MaryaDmitrievnaLikesSundays (~7k) ”No,” Henry said. “I…” He trailed off, his eyes stuck somewhere behind Alex. Alex followed his gaze and felt dread settle hard in his stomach at where it landed. Pink, purple, and blue. An eagle set between red and green lines. The flags that Alex refused to be ashamed of, taken apart by Henry’s unreadable gaze. So. It was like that. Henry was like that. Or, the college au where Alex is absolutely, positively sure his roommate is homophobic.

you’re leaving (now i’m left amongst the living) by peppermintpatties (~37k)

Six years since they've been together, Alex and Henry were now a far cry from the lovestruck couple they once were when their history began. If you ask Alex, all of it was Henry’s fault. If you ask Henry, he’d agree and say that Alex was right. But before Alex could ever find out why Henry does not seem like the man he once decided to spend the rest of his life with, he already walked away from it all. Now, Henry was alone, left to deal with whatever shattered remains he could salvage from his life. Or, the one where Henry’s sick and Alex only finds out two years after they've broken up.

Please Don't Let Me Be So Understood by chamel (~20k)

“I’m glad you both see it that way,” Dr. Chen says. Then she closes her notebook and folds her hands on top of it. “I think I’m starting to get a sense of where the issues lie. The good news is that you’re both here, and you’re both willing to work on this relationship. That’s promising. Not all of the couples I see are even at that point.” “Sorry, what?” Henry says, voicing Alex’s stuttering thoughts as well. (After one too many fights at work, Henry and Alex are assigned mandatory reconciliation therapy by their boss. Except the therapist thinks they're there for couples therapy... and surely, a bet on who will break first makes more sense than actually correcting her, right?)

a fair amount of it is just them being dumb lmao

*Nova, Baby by chamel (~67k)

Agent Henry Fox-Mountchristen is an asshole. Alex is 90% sure those exact words are going in this mission report. Yeah, they’re supposed to be objective when writing this shit up, but that isn’t his opinion. It’s a fact. (CIA agent Alex Claremont-Diaz and MI6 agent Henry Fox-Mountchristen don’t exactly get along, but that doesn’t keep their respective agencies from insisting they work together as partners. Then a mission in Colombia changes everything, and their relationship begins to shift and grow into something that neither of them ever expected… and something that could have deadly consequences.)

#rwrb fic recs #rwrb fanfiction #rwrb fanfic #rwrb #rwrb movie #henry fox mountchristen windsor #alex claremont diaz #red white and royal blue movie #red white and royal blue #royal's rwrb fic recs

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ladyaj-13 · 4 months

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LadyAJ’s 2023 Fics

This year I wrote 16 new stories (and one new chapter on an old one!) across five fandoms - One Direction, Endeavour, Kingsman, The Eagle and new-to-me Ted Lasso. Details below, I hope you’ll check some out - I like to think there’s a bit of something for everyone.

One Direction

Bloom - T, 28k, Louis/Liam

Do you like historical AUs? Do you like awesome art by @whatagreatproblemtohave? Then you’ll like this, written for the One Direction Big Bang.

In early 1970s Oxford, Detective Sergeant Louis Tomlinson has to deal with the dual pressures of a case that hits too close to home, and the arrival of new colleague Liam Payne. Payne is both the bane of his existence and, uh... dangerous. Very dangerous. His eyes, that is. His lips. The way he stands.

A story of rain and cobblestones, cigarettes, and repression. And the sunshine after the storm.

In Shining Armour of Trackie and Trainers - T, 9k, Louis/Harry

Because who wouldn’t love white knight Louis coming to their rescue?

Online dating isn't exactly working for Harry. In fact, it couldn't really be going much worse. But then the door of the bar opens, and the pack of friends walking in parts and - that’s Louis Tomlinson.

Louis fucking Tomlinson.

Pageant Material - G, 6k, Louis/Zayn

Watch me throw Miss Congeniality and Kacey Musgraves together, shake it up, and give it a Zouis twist. Written for the Zouis fest.

Louis flicks a nearby switch, lighting the bulbs around his mirror in a soft glow. The buttery yellow catches on the edges of his cheekbones, sharpening the dip. He looks more grown up this year. Some of his baby fat has melted away, and he sucks in his cheeks to see what he might look like by twenty five if this pattern continues. Then he crosses his eyes and sticks out his tongue.

Or, the Zouis teen beauty pageant AU.

The Way to My Heart - T, 6k, Louis/Harry

Fluffy, funny AU Larry with lots of Nouis friendship on the side. Written for the a/b/o fest.

Louis' having a bit of a dry spell, until he bumps into an attractive alpha in the supermarket and leaves with his number. It was a hard bump. Very... muscular.

The only problem is, said alpha asks Louis to cook for him - which is not exactly his skill set.

Feeling Feline - T, 4k, Louis/Niall

Nouis, my beloved, with shelter-worker!Niall and magical cat transformations. Written for the Louis rare pair fest.

“I’m telling you,” drifts through the cracked door, and Louis’ ears prick, twitching with interest. “There’s something wrong with that cat.”

“Have you talked to Liam?” asks another voice, worried. Louis thinks it’s the tall one with curly hair. Taller one. They’re all tall when you’re ten inches high.

“Not medically wrong,” the blond one says. “But I swear, and I know this sounds nuts, but I don’t think he’s a cat?”

Fine Line - G, 1k, Louis/Nick Grimshaw

It’s present day, it’s canon compliant, it’s just long enough to read while waiting for the bus assuming it’s not got stuck in traffic.

Telling his family was always going to be a big deal, but doing it alone was a sacrifice he could make.

He never thought they’d fall about laughing.

In The Dark - T, 666, Gen

Choose your own character in this spooky snippet written for the trick or treat fest.

It’s the dreams.

He’d be fine without the dreams… suggesting things. If he could face all this - whatever this is - with a clear, rested mind.

Bound - G, 619, Liam/Zayn

Vampire AU? Check.

Months should pass like hours for a vampire, but to Zayn they’ve felt endless. Now, finally, it has come. The day he takes his consort.

Endeavour

Tread Carefully into my Life - T, 29k, WIP, Morse/Jakes

See? I told you it’s not abandoned. Maybe 2024 is the year I finally finish this canon rewrite where Jakes stayed - in the meantime, enjoy nearly thirty thousand words of their on/off up/down shenanigans!

He can't help the way his eyes drift across the room, to Morse in his shirtsleeves, arms crossed across his body. It’s a defensive posture, which is no surprise, but otherwise he looks collected. Calm. Like facing down man eating beasts is all part of the job, and despite the evidence of today, it most certainly is not part of the job.

Tigers. For the love of God, give him an axe murderer any day.

Stepping Out - G, 9k, Morse/Jakes/Joan

Established polyamory with the Oxford disaster trio. Jakes didn’t leave.

“You know what I haven't done in ages?” Joan asks, punctuating her question by flinging her legs up and leaning dramatically backwards against the sofa arm. Peter almost spills his tea. “Gone dancing. We should go.”

Kindred - G, 2k, Gen

Ohhh series nine. Pre-slash Morse/Sam if you really squint.

Sam Thursday, Morse, and the power of orange juice.

Offcuts - G, 2k, Morse/Jakes/Joan

With this final instalment, the series is complete. As a whole it's almost 32k, so if you like Endeavour and polyamorous relationships, set aside a Saturday and dive in.

Snapshot scenes of life with the trio.

Adding it Up - G, 887, Morse/Jakes

Let’s return to series three, because Jakes.

Fred’s been a copper for a long time. It’s in his bones at this point, a habit so engrained he can’t turn it off. Like Morse with his beer and Jakes with his cigarettes, Fred’s addiction is piecing things together. Even when he’d rather not.

Ted Lasso

Would You Rather - G, 1k - Colin & Jamie, Roy/Jamie

It had to happen! Diving into a new fandom is always a pleasure.

"I’m talking about percentages. Like, yeah, you’re gay. So maybe you’re at like, eighty, ninety per cent. But if I say who’d you rather fuck out of Ms Welton, Keeley and Maisie from the canteen, you know what you’d say, right?”

Colin is beginning to think Jamie doesn’t know what gay is. "Erm, no."

Squeegee - M, 525 - Roy/Jamie

Short and snappy ;)

Jamie’s beautifully vocal in bed, but long, pitchy squeaking is new.

Kingsman

The Honeypots - T, 5k - Eggsy/Harry

Partial AU with undercover, honeypot spy shenanigans and obliviousness? I wrote it for a reason. I mean, it’s right up my street.

Eggsy is MI6. Harry is Kingsman. They have each been tasked to seduce a suspected rival intelligence agent.

The intelligence part may be overselling it.

The Eagle of the Ninth

Winter Sunlight - G, 1k, Marcus/Esca

I think writing a fluffy, happy gay farmers fic is actually a requirement of this fandom. Here’s my offering.

“How is it,” a familiar voice mutters drowsily, muffled by the drape of skins and fur, “that after all these years, you still can’t manage a proper lie in?”

#my year in review #my fic posts #endeavour fanfic #one direction fanfic #1D #kingsman fanfic #ted lasso fanfic #eagle of the ninth fanfic #aj writes fanfic

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trelkez · 1 year

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Ah, Ted Lasso. This episode was 90% mess, but that 10% sure does know how to hook me.

I wish I could go back in time to the self who went into Ted Lasso thinking it was tightly plotted, top tier stuff and say, "this is a ridiculous show, but you should watch it anyway. You'll love the characters. You will get so much found family. Just don't get too attached to any plotlines or expect anything to make sense ever, and you'll be fine." That would be a reasonable expectation for this show! Unfortunately for me, we're down to the final three episodes, so it's a bit late for me to recalibrate at this point. I am, alas, still invested in the plotlines.

So let's get into 3.10, because … wow, is there a lot to get into.

I'm rewatching the episode as I write this (just in case I forget any of the batshit turns it took and/or parts of it turn out to have been a fever dream), so I'm going to tackle it roughly in order.

1. Richmond's ten game winning streak

Where are we at in the season? Does anyone know?

Remember when this show had season arcs organized around some kind of football-related goal? Avoid relegation, make it back into the Premier League. It seemed logical that the goal of this season would be to win the league, but I guess we're going to get there by putting the team on cheat mode in the background and then shoehorning in some "will they or won't they" football drama at the end, which is actually very in keeping with the overall theme of this episode.

2. Nate quit West Ham off-screen

I'm so glad the guy in the apartment on the other side of my living room wall was out for the night, because I literally shrieked "WHAT?????? WHAT???????" when that "Nate Shelley Out at West Ham" graphic went up.

I didn't get to Nate in my 3.09 writeup, and it's just as well, because anything I wrote before that graphic would have been immediately rendered pointless. Nate quit West Ham off-screen. He quit off-screen.

I am going to reach way, way back to the Nate Shelley I liked in season one and say: that Nate did not deserve this shit.

It has been obvious throughout this entire season that the writers weren't interested in telling the story that season two set up. They didn't especially want to dwell on or in the toxicity that bottomed Nate out last season; they didn't want to do the harder narrative work of actually building back an unlikeable character through a slow but steady redemption arc, even though they've spent entire seasons doing exactly that with Jamie. Instead, they said, "yeah, but Nate isn't really That Guy."

Does the show regret what it did? It sure feels that way. It feels like, in the pursuit of telling a story about a good guy on an ego-fueled descent, the show went way further than it meant to and has now decided to backtrack on that by treating the whole thing like a guy waking up from a bender and going, "I did what last night? Why did I do that?" That wasn't really Nate who did those things, that was Drunk Nate! He did five shots of narcissism and got blackout drunk on jealousy, and he woke up in the morning with a new job. What wild shenanigans will ensue?

So, sure. The only way any of it makes sense is if none of it meant anything. Fine. Even then, what was the point of sending Nate to West Ham and throwing all of Rupert's smothering, menacing glitz at him only for NATE QUITTING HIS JOB AND WALKING AWAY FROM RUPERT AND WEST HAM to happen OFF-SCREEN so they can CATCH US UP ON IT via FAKE SPORTS NEWS INFOGRAPHIC??

If they didn't show it because they felt the real rejection was in Nate going home to his girlfriend, that is very poor storytelling in a season that started out with the most literal Rupert is Palpatine visual parallels imaginable. If they're trying to say that the real climax of Nate's story isn't in rejecting Rupert, but in the amends he makes with the people he hurt, then why did they drag the West Ham stuff out until the tenth episode??? Why is all of this being left for the end, when none of the West Ham stuff has ultimately mattered at all, and pulling the plug on it earlier on could've left a lot of room for handling Nate's healing process at a slower, more organic pace?

Ultimately, this is a story about a good guy who lost his way a little and wound up hanging out with a bad crowd, and now he has to apologize his way back into the hearts of his real friends. The storytelling along the way has been wildly incoherent and had brutally terrible pacing, but if you completely disregard how we got here and pretend season one Nate just woke up from a West Ham bender, there's still time to enjoy the endgame.

3. Isaac is team captain again!

So – Isaac went into the crowd and wasn't banned for the remainder of the season? Let's close our eyes for a moment and imagine that the football gods looked upon Isaac's actions and said, "yeah, that seems legit, let's give him the smallest possible set of consequences." He was sent off with a red card. For assault. But the football gods are treating punching a fan like having a go at an opposing player! Cool. That's still, what, three games?

So even if we assume he only got a three-game ban, and keeping in mind that Richmond isn't in the Champions or Europa leagues and the FA Cup is just – not happening, I guess? So they probably don't have a ton of midweek games, which means that it's been … weeks.

But wasn't the win streak at eight games last week? So – did Isaac just – not get a ban? At all?

Nope. No. Self, you are a Ted Lasso Doylist now, remember? Nothing that happened last week was actually about Isaac in any way, so why would there be ongoing consequences for him from that storyline? Deep breaths.

Isaac is one of my favorite characters in this show, and I'm not particularly interested in there being ongoing consequences for him from whatever that was last week, so – this is fine. Don't question it. We float on an ocean of vibes. Everything is great.

4. Why?

Why did we just take a beat for microaggression with Ted being shocked Bumbercatch is Swiss? Is this really where we're at these days, comedy-wise?

I'm genuinely not sure that anyone involved here knows how to write Ted without making him completely exhausting to be around, anymore. Is that on purpose? Let's pretend it's on purpose.

5. Do we think Nate is capable of being involved in something like that?

"Nah." – the writers, who are pretending they haven't seen season two

6. Jade

I like her so much, but I am 99.95% sure that's because she is being written to be likable, with no other discernible qualities. Who is she? What motivates her? In a season full of long episodes, was there really no time to show her existing when Nate isn't in the room? Did no one in the writer's room stop to wonder, "hey, is it at all dicey if that woman in the restaurant who dislikes Nate suddenly falls in love with him so he can be healed by the power of love?" Did no one say that out loud and hear how it sounds?

Anyway. Jade. Big fan. Looking forward to hearing all about her hobbies and backstory in the ample time remaining.

7. Dani vs. Van Damme

I have a feeling this completely random side adventure into our purest angel having an asshole hypercompetitive side isn't going to land for everyone, but you know what? Sure. Why not. There are epic tales out there of teammates facing each other in the Olympics, the World Cup, etc. and trying to destroy each other and then going home like none of it ever happened. I'm totally onboard for this kind of plot in theory! They took it a little too far with Dani breaking Van Damme's nose, but as we've established, "they took it a little too far" is the story of this entire show.

You know what would have improved this a lot? If it had happened near the beginning of the season and kicked off a recurring storyline in which someone else now has to face Dani on a spring international break. Shoved in at the end of the season (and probably the end of the series), it loses a lot of its potential, so the placement is … strange. Instead of being an ongoing character trait they could slowly build up and make funnier in the re-telling, it comes out of nowhere and immediately goes to 11. But otherwise, why not.

8. Beard gets it

Beard is the only one who watched season two. He gets it.

It would explain a lot about Beard and this entire season if Beard used to be a time traveler, so he's the only one in Richmond immune to changes in the timeline. Maybe somewhere just out of sight there's a genre show about time travel happening, and this football team just happens to exist in that universe – so the world of Ted Lasso is constantly being rewritten, but no one notices. Ted Lasso as a Doctor Who spin-off in which no one has ever met or heard of The Doctor.

No one but Beard, anyway. Is Beard also the only one who remembers that Isaac went into the crowd last week?

9. Uncle's Day

10/10, no notes. Every time I think I'm out, this show uses Jamie Tartt to drag me right back in.

(Actually, no, one note: Jamie was joking about Isaac being his best friend, right? That was just to screw with Roy? I'm going to assume Isaac was the choice for that line because it's so obviously unlikely given how rarely they interact, and not because the writers think Jamie and Isaac are still BFFs. It would be very in keeping with this season for them to think Jamie and Isaac's friendship is just running on cheat mode in the background, but like – I'm going to assume. For my sanity. That it's just a joke.)

The funniest part of this scene winds up being that they accidentally made it look like Phoebe was having an "oh. oh" moment about Roy and Jamie. I had to rewind that twice to figure out that she was spelling it out in her head, and not like, catching on.

I would've understood if she had caught on. Roy stares at Jamie for 10.6 seconds before he says "I love it."

10. Super League? In this economy?

+10 points to Leslie for "I hate to break it to you, Rebecca, but those children are dead."

Unfortunately, -10 points to Leslie for "who cares why Rupert invited you?" Historically speaking, Rebecca should care. Rebecca is totally justified in wondering why Rupert invited her!

Why would Richmond be invited into talks about a Super League at all? Richmond? Recently promoted Richmond? Complete lack of international play Richmond? It's sus as hell. If I were Rebecca, I would absolutely assume this was some strange plot by my evil ex-husband.

(I'm not convinced it wasn't, in fact, a strange plot by her evil ex-husband. Something is going on there.)

Super League is about the richest teams banding together to shake off the chaff. As a Spurs fan, I fully, completely understand the concept of a team that isn't actually rich and successful trying to buy into an exclusive club – yes, Spurs were involved in Super League drama; no, you shouldn't ask me about their season or we'll still be here next week while I cry on you – and we are definitely already outside the tethers of reality when West Ham is at the table, but it, truly it makes no sense.

(And even if Rupert weren't the one extending the offer, "go check it out, what's the worst that could happen?" is naive at best. What's the worst that could happen? The media finds out that Rebecca was at a Super League meeting and now Richmond is being dragged into a shitstorm, whether Rebecca decided to buy in or not. Girl, do not go in there! If you don't want to join, don't join! Why is any of this happening! Get Keeley back in the building before someone runs into a PR problem they truly cannot back out of!)

11. Is the psychic's prophecy still a thing?

So … is the show going Tedbecca? After that weird flirty moment she had with Sam earlier, the matchbook almost calls back to Sam more than Ted, but the show did make a point of having Ted pull out that matchbook a few episodes ago, and here it's directly paired with his toy soldier.

(Honestly, slow clap for everyone who did those green matchbook / green soldier gif sets earlier this season, I thought you guys were reaching straight into outer space with that one and apparently I was dead wrong!)

Ted and Rebecca have barely even talked to each other in the back half of the season. Every week I log on here and see shippers shriveling into dust, their crops unwatered. Is the matchbook/soldier thing a misdirect, or are they going to cram a significant relationship change into the final two episodes of the season after largely ignoring them in the lead-up?

I have no idea which way this is going to swing, and that's kind of terrible, because there are only two episodes left. There isn't time left to do any kind of meaningful build. There's only time for a sudden last-minute rush of drama.

When I put it like that, I think they probably are going to shove it into the endgame. Either that, or the houseboat guy suddenly shows back up out of nowhere. Whatever happens, it is going to have a "bet you didn't see that coming" flavor, because there isn't time for anything else.

12. Roy has an epiphany

What the fuck even is this?

Listen. It never made sense for Roy to have broken up with Keeley. It was clearly something they did as a way to inject some new drama. THAT SAID, they did it, and they committed to it for almost an entire fucking season, and TEN EPISODES ON a teacher with a crush on Roy makes a way-too-personal comment about how she hopes his mess hasn't caused any damage, and THAT'S what makes him suddenly realize he needs to apologize to Keeley? THAT? Just like. Boom. Realization sets in. Lightbulb visibly goes off overhead as he mutters "fuuuuuuck" to himself. A fully illustrated epiphany!

What the fuck does this show think it's doing having Roy suddenly realize that he probably hurt Keeley and needs to apologize?

In episode ten?????

I don't know how much time has passed, because in Ted Lasso season three time is an illusion, but at minimum – months. Months later, he suddenly realizes he might have hurt his girlfriend when he broke up with her??? That isn't character growth. That is completely fucking absurd. They needed Roy and Keeley to get back together and pushed it too close to the last minute, so they did some schoolteacher deus ex machina. Of all the abrupt plot turns in this episode, this might be the second worst.

(There's a clear winner and this isn't it, but second place? It's a contender.)

13. What happened to the corporate pixie dream girl?

So the overall implication here, between this and Trent's rumor of West Ham workplace misbehavior, is that Rupert is probably headed for some workplace harassment trouble, right? If withholding the mystery of it all turns out to be why they didn't show Nate quitting in this episode, I'm going to scream. I will literally shriek with the frustration of a thousand bad plot decisions.

14. Nate's nostalgia journey

This is, sincerely, great stuff with the photo albums and the music and the journey into the attic. There is still time to enjoy the endgame!! Disregard how we got here!!

15. Rebecca vs. Super League

Just watching this scene made me feel like I've now put in enough time on Ted Lasso to be allowed by contract to take some PTO. Ted Lasso needs to pay me for my time while I recover on a tiny island in the Outer Banks. I've earned it.

So – they thought – having Rebecca scoldingly yell "what do you think you're doing? Just stop it!" while picturing aging rich men as little boys was, like … feminist? Someone involved in this process thought, wouldn't it be great if we empowered Rebecca by making her everyone's scolding mother, and no one along the way went, wait, what?

But then it keeps going so that we can humanize Rupert, which – what? Why is this happening? Why do I know Rupert's humanizing backstory when to my knowledge, Jade was born inside Taste of Athens?

This is the most I have ever seen Rebecca care about football. It's a lovely speech, but where is it coming from? Since when is she this invested? The only thing that rings true about this is that Super League is an ugly money grab and many, many owners do not give a single shit about their team's fans. Someone wanted to write a speech about that, so we're getting it through Rebecca, just like we got that speech about deleting your camera roll through Isaac.

Also – the food: I know that the food is a continuation of Edwin Akufo's whole thing with Sam, but it is a weird fucking choice to put so much emphasis on Ghanian food and then reduce it to slop thrown at Rebecca.

Beginning to end, we could've done without this entire Super League story and been just fine. It isn't like this 63-minute episode required extra filler.

16. 24

10/10, no notes. They really do pull me back in with Jamie every time. He revealed that 24 and I, like Roy Kent talking to a schoolteacher, suddenly realized that I ship it. Jamie wore Sam's number?? I'm going to vid this so hard.

17. Nate's dad

I did say there was a clear winner for the episode's worst plot turn.

Nate is sad at home for one episode and suddenly his dad does a complete turnaround after almost three entire seasons? It isn't like we heard a story one time about Nate's dad and now we're getting a reveal on what actually happened there – we've seen him a lot! Nate's entire motivation set is built on his dad and their relationship!

"I pushed you to succeed so you would have more opportunities than I did" is a completely legitimate story to tell, but this has been almost three seasons of disapproval so thick that it threw toxic sludge across the entire show. Nothing Nate has done has ever been good enough. Now we're at the end, and they want to heal it so that Nate can grow, so all of that is being retconned into, "I never cared if you were successful, I just want you to be happy," and suddenly his dad is a completely different person. Boom, fixed! Definitely not the kind of thing you have to heal from over time!

I say again: Nate's story deserved better than this. By pushing this all the way to the end, they've run out of room to take their time with it, so it's just being dropped in. What a mess this season is.

18. Rebecca, do NOT do it

This season is, in fact, such a mess that for a minute there, I believed that Rebecca might actually go for it with Rupert.

I think, more than anything, I'm puzzled by the perceived necessity of this closure on Rebecca and Rupert. I get that they wanted to give us a taste of what brought Rupert and Rebecca together in the first place – to have Rebecca to see him in that old light again before taking a step back, so she could acknowledge the past in a way that helped her finally make a clean break. I get it. But … why? Was this really something lingering out there for her to overcome?

Rebecca's entire season-long conflict with Rupert has felt like intentional backsliding for the purposes of The Drama. If you imagine that she came into this season still very fired up and insecure about her ex-husband, the arc from "I want Zava so Rupert can't have him" to "I don't care about beating Rupert anymore" is fine. But … did she? Is that really where we left her in season two?

And why did an episode in which Nate quits West Ham spend so much time breaking up Rupert and Rebecca, who were already broken up, while Nate quit off-screen?

19. What's left?

Two episodes to go! That's so much time in which to accomplish so many things!

I said to someone last week: you know, I thought this was headed for a "Nate takes over as Richmond's head coach" place, but there isn't enough time left in the season for them to do that, so I guess he's just going to be staying at West Ham?

Turns out they can do anything, because they're just going to drop in whatever at the last minute. Nothing means anything! We exist in a world without the constraints of plot and continuity! Everything is on the table.

So, what's left to shoehorn in?

- Manchester City has been inevitable all season (ask Arsenal how that feels), and we're probably going to get some stuff with Jamie's dad there. Jamie has been one of the only characters they've consistently done right by, so my fingers are crossed they don't screw that up at the finish line.

- Will Trent ever come out to the Diamond Dogs? Maybe being out in the workplace isn't his thing, but it feels like a missed avenue of storytelling to have Trent be right there in the coaching offices, in on all the gossip and sharing and advice, and not have whatever he has going on be a part of it. That would have been such an easy way to integrate queer identity into everyday conversation over a decent chunk of the season, instead of playing it almost exclusively for drama the way they have been.

- Still on Nate's apology list: Colin and Ted? If apologizing to Ted doesn't involve the believe sign somehow, I really don't know anything about this show anymore.

- Is Ted staying in London or going back to Kansas? A lot of people seem resigned to the idea that he's going back, and a lot of Tumblr is hoping he stays for Rebecca, but I wouldn't be surprised if it's some secret third thing. Two whole episodes! There's still plenty of time for them to drop a surprise twist on us. (If he goes back to Michelle, it won't be a surprise twist, but I will turn this car around.)

- Are we ever going to learn what was up with Baz's friend who got kicked out of the pub? I really thought we were headed for some bigger integration of Colin's story, wherein it turned out that was Baz's secret boyfriend or something, but … … …?

- Is anything going to come of Trent's book? I have $5 on there being an epilogue time skip in which we fast forward to the book release and see what the characters are up to (aka the "no seriously, this is it, the show is over" ending) and another $5 on the show ending on Ted in the airport and the book not ultimately meaning anything.

Two weeks until we find out!

#ted lasso #ted lasso meta #episode reactions #we float on an ocean of vibes #everything is fine

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vera-deville · 1 year

Text

IKEA Shenanigans

01/20/2023 - 01/29/2023

Pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x Reader

Word Count: 1,775

Warnings: There's some cussing, (more from the reader than Katsuki actually)

Gender: AFAB

Notes: So, I was going through fanfic ideas, and I came across one where the Reader's younger sibling gets lost in IKEA, and they need the character's help finding them.

Now, I find this funny (though I don't think I'd ever lose a child, but hey, there's a first time for everything). I tried thinking about which character to write for this one shot, and I ended up choosing Katsuki Bakugou.

This is quite exciting for me, because I've never written for BNHA before, though I drown myself in Bakugou fanfics practically every week-

Anywho, I hope that this is an acceptable entry into the BNHA fanfic realm! Fair warning, Katsuki doesn't do much talking in this, and honestly, there's not even much interaction between the reader and Katsuki.

Now, I did write this keeping the Reader as AFAB, but if you'd like a gender neutral version, please let me know!

Y/N has younger siblings in this one, one being a brother and another being a sister.

Oh, and this was not a request!

In which Katsuki Bakugou helps the Reader to find their younger siblings who have snuck away in IKEA.

If Y/N had a doubloon for every time her younger siblings got lost out in public, despite her keeping an eye on them and telling them to stay close, she'd probably have two or three doubloons, which isn't much, but the fact that it's happened that many times is still rather annoying.

And right now was one of those times.

Y/N swore that she'd wring their necks the second she could, but the top most priority at the current moment was to find the little gremlins.

Y/N understood their excitement, really. The family had recently moved, and the twins who had previously shared a room, now had their own separate rooms, and they were allowed to decorate their rooms however they'd liked (as long as it stayed within the budget and actually looked decent and relatively put together).

But that didn't mean that they had the free all to disappear the second their older sister, who, mind you, was put in charge of watching over them while their parents were in a different section of the insanely large store, just because they could.

Because of this, Y/N had to find them, wherever they were, before her parents could get wind that she'd lost them.

And so began the great search of two pint sized demon spawn in the middle of IKEA, where they could be anywhere.

But first things first.

Y/N had to figure out where exactly she was.

After briskly walking around (with no help from her lack of sense of direction) for five minutes, Y/N located the map of the floor. Seems she was at the living rooms. Makes sense. There were literal living rooms around her. Probably should have figured that one out faster-

Y/N searched every living room, and somehow got lost in one of the rooms (though she did eventually find her way back to familiar territory), and still no sign of her younger siblings. Next up, she maneuvered her way into the sofa beds section (referencing the map she took a picture of earlier), and funnily enough, she saw a splash of very familiar sandy-blonde nearby. Whipping her head back, she scanned through the people, but couldn't find what she thought she'd seen, so she went back to her original search.

Luckily for Y/N, the sofa beds were not as confusing as the rooms, and searching through the whole section, she still couldn't find the brats.

And just like that, the dining section had been passed, just as the the wall units and media storage, workspace, and kitchen sections has been (with, mind you, still no sign of the two troublemakers).

At this moment, Y/N started panicking more than she had before, because she started thinking that perhaps she'd missed her siblings in one of the previous sections, or perhaps they had somehow evaded her sight and rushed back to one of the said previous sections. She didn't know how much time she had left before her parents came upstairs and found her, alone, without the two tiny human beings she was entrusted with.

God she'd make a terrible parent-

After panicking for what felt like fifteen minutes (when in actuality, it was just four), Y/N stood back up from her crouched position, straightened her back, rolled her shoulders, took a deep breath, and started walking back to where her search first started. Whether the kids were actually there or not, she did not know, but...it wouldn't hurt to check, right?

And so she passed the kitchens, the media storages, and everything else in between until she once again found herself in the maze of living rooms, and the verge of another panic attack. She crouched down, hugging herself, and quite vocally scolding herself over the fact that her siblings were most probably in the sections that she had not searched yet, which were the bedrooms and children's things.

Too busy cursing herself for her stupidity of having wasted precious time trying to find the twerps, and more importantly, having lost them in the first place, Y/N didn't notice the heavy, but calculated footsteps steadily approaching her (still) crouched figure.

When a hand pressed on her shoulder, Y/N wildly sucker punched whoever it was that dared touch her, and grew nervous when the stranger skillfully grabbed her wrist before the damage could be done.

Locking eyes with the stranger's vermillion ones, Y/N felt her soul leave her body because, as it turned out, it was no stranger that she'd just tried to sucker punch.

No, absolutely not.

It was Katsuki fucking Bakugou.

Her long time crush.

IN IKEA.

If the ground could swallow her up whole, Y/N desperately though it'd be a brilliant time for that to happen.

"The fuck are you doing on the ground?" Asked Bakugou.

Y/N could feel his inquisitive, yet grumpy gaze, and stood up, dusting off whatever dust particles may have gathered on her outfit. "I was just tying my shoelaces. I'm surprised to see you here though. What're you up to?" She applauded herself in her mind for seeming so cool and casual and not a complete mess, completely forgetting her choice of footwear.

Katsuki took note of the ironic buckle shoes Y/N, which had no laces, but didn't make it verbally known, and instead told her that his parents wanted to get some stuff and he had to come along.

As much as Y/N wanted to continue talking to her crush of who knows how long, she did have a very important mission. Love comes only after idiots who get themselves lost. Unfortunately.

"Actually, I'm looking for my younger brother and sister. I've been searching for them for ages, and the twerps still refuse to be found. So, I gotta go find them. See you at school on Monday!" Y/N said as she started making her way back to the bedroom and children's IKEA sections as she still hadn't searched those areas.

"Wait, your siblings wouldn't by any chance be twins around the age of seven, would they?" Katsuki asked.

Surprised, Y/N nodded her head and told him that he was indeed correct.

Without a further explanation, Katsuki told Y/N to follow him, as he skillfully lead her through the crowds of people and the mind-numbing layout (at least in Y/N's opinion) of the store, all the way to the children's IKEA.

And right there, were two children, fighting over who saw first and, therefore, gets to buy the canopy they found.

Y/N facepalmed (slightly startling Katsuki) at the pathetic sight. The idiots could have just bought a canopy each, why the hell were they fighting over one freaking canopy?

Katsuki stayed quiet, and decided to just witness the scene before him when Y/N walked over to her siblings and smacked them both on the back of their heads.

Furious, the children started directing their potential anger at Y/N for showing up out of nowhere and smacking them, only for the eldest to start her own tirade against the young ones. Pretty soon, Katsuki was blessed (not really) with the sight of three siblings, one with a decent age gap between the other two, mind you, arguing with each other about the most random shit.

One was pissed about the other two sneaking away to the other fucking side of the store, one was pissed about getting smacked in the head because apparently they told them that they'd be going to the children's section (and the canopy), and the last one was pissed about (also) get smacked in the head, as well as the canopy, and a stuffed animal (Katsuki didn't know where that one came from), and a bunch of other things.

"Y/N, sweetie, there you kids are!" Yelled a familiar voice.

Immediately, the three siblings morphed into completely different people and greeted their mother and father with the faces (and attitudes) of angels, as if they hadn't been straight up fighting a few seconds ago.

Bakugou couldn't help but wonder if they all had split-personality or something.

"Hey mom! Did you guys get what you needed to get?" Asked Y/N, skillfully taking the canopy away from the twins, who were eyeing it greedily.

"We did. Though it was a hassle finding our way through the place. Did you guys get lost? Your father and I had to ask five different people for directions, can you believe it?" Y/N's mother said. "Oh, and your father being your father, said that he knew exactly where we were, but he only got us more lost than we already were."

Y/N and her siblings laughed at this, and Katsuki felt incredibly weird just standing there, with this family interacting in front of him, completely forgetting his existence. And yet, it was sort of nice seeing Y/N the way she was. It was...domestic in a way.

And right as he was thinking that, they matriarch of the L/N family noticed him, and asked Y/N about him. Katsuki unconsciously straightened his spine, while Y/N introduced him.

"Oh, this is my friend from school! We randomly bumped into each other here while the twins were picking out their canopies, and he was helping us choose some stuff." Replied Y/N, sneaking a threatening glance at the twins to make sure they keep their mouths shut about her lie. The twins obliged.

Now, feeling even more awkward, Katsuki (somehow) pleasantly greeted Y/N's parents, and lied about how his parents were probably looking for him, and he had to get going. Y/N's parents told him it was nice meeting him, before telling their kids that they'd best be going as well, and get their items all checked out.

The twins went along with their parents, and Y/N lingered behind for a bit. Looking at Bakugou, she said in a sweet voice, "It was nice you outside of school. We should totally hang sometime!"

Before Katsuki could tell her that he wasn't going to fucking meet up with her outside of school, since he already saw her dumb face enough in school (that's a lie, he definitely wanted to meet up), Y/N told him one final thing before prancing away, "Tell anyone I lost the two shitheads and your neck will be lacking a head~"

Yup, Y/N was still the same even outside of school.

With a smirk on his face, Katsuki made his way back to where his parents were supposed to be, already awaiting seeing Y/N at school on Monday.

~ Vera Lisle

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