Like or reblog this post if you’d like to interact with a Indie, Semi-selective and Crossover friendly Harold Hutchins from the amazing series Captain Underpants by Dav Pilkey!
haunted mansion 2023 slapped honestly, it was dumb and gave the exact same "kooky adventure that doesnt really need to make sense to be fun" vibes that the ride gives. need more movies like this honestly
also father kent is hilarious and i will be drawing him a lot now. the image of owen wilson walking into a strangers house with some random cat in his arms has been burned into my brain forever
(i know that is not how tater tot looks. thats actually my cat, baked potato, cuz i thought it was funny. SPUD CATS FOREVER)
October, my friend, it seems I have to ask you again to guide a dear friend of mine this year... our last rat, Tot, has passed away. She's a very sweet rat, very affectionate, and a strong girl who did her best to fight her illness. I'm sure she'd make a good traveling companion, she'd have funny stories to tell you about her and her sister, Tater who is waiting for her.
Of course, dear spirit, I will be sure to do that. Tot sounds like she's a real sweetheart and I can tell she was well loved by you- as have been many of your small companions. Im sure that Tater has been patiently waiting for her sister so that they can travel and get into all new sorts of adventures along with Mr. Flappy.
They will be alright, so please try to rest easy. 🕯️
mothers of the groom. are queer, will travel to be your mom when your assigned mom at birth sucks. sample speech below:
I never intended to acquire a son at the age of 24, let alone a teenage son who lived halfway across the continental US. But I've striven to be worthy of the honor of being called mom by this incredible young man in front of me ever since the first time he gave me the title.
If we've never met, my name is Emily, and I've had the pleasure of being the half feral wolverine who has spent the past half decade raising Grey by hand. I taught him about the important things in life -- the epic highs and lows of professional wrestling, how to edit a history essay, how to both get into and out of trouble. I even, albeit a little accidentally, gave Grey his name.
But he's given me something much more important than a name, or a title, or any of the other things I facetiously listed before. When Grey came into my life, I was, like I said, 24. I had been disowned by my own family for being gay, working and living in NYC and fighting every day to keep myself alive. To find a reason to keep fighting every day.
Grey, you were my light in the darkness. Watching you grow up and find yourself, watching you turn into this smart, kind, tenacious young man has been the greatest honor and pleasure of my life. Thank you for allowing me to accompany you on your journey, for giving me the opportunity to show up for you, to give you advice (even if sometimes you ignore it out of hand), to be proud of you, to comfort you when you're sad and remind you that no matter what happens, I am there right behind you. Thank you for allowing me to walk with you in this newest phase of your life alongside you as your mom. Having earned this place in your life is the thing I am most proud of, and I hope to keep earning my place as you and Tay move into this exciting new season of life--marriage.
My wife Leah and I have been married for three years, after which I have learned two things. One--that no two marriages and two people are alike, and therefore trying to say pretty aphorisms and sage advice as if they're universal truths is a waste of time. Two--before starting a fight, eat a potato. Any form of potato. Hashbrown, mashed, tater tot, French fry. If I've learned anything in three years, it's that a lot of problems can be solved by going through the McDonalds drive thru. Especially when you go together.
But truly--this is an exciting time for you both, ripe with new beginnings and adventures and challenges. Your victories will be made sweeter, your defeats made softer, because you will do them together. From this day to your last day, you will be a team, working together to accomplish goals and weather difficulties that will seem impossible to fathom alone. The whole of two people, sealed together in marriage, is greater than the sum of their parts. Your future together is infinite.
Thank you for including me, including all of us, in this moment and allowing us the honor and opportunity to show up for you with love. I believe I am not alone in raising my glass, and wishing you both a long and happy life.
Favorite Color: Oh man. Predominately a deep, pomegranate red but I love forest green, royal navy and gold also.
Currently Reading: Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy
Last Song: High Waves by Altin Lazer Blaster
Last Movie: oh dear… heck I don’t remember? I think it was the latest Minions whatever
Last Series: The Terror 🥲
Craving: Indian food, shakshouka, fried oysters, tater tots
Tea or Coffee: Yes. 😌 But no, tea is for autumn and coffee is for survival.
Currently Working On: HA HA. UUUUUUM SO MANY????
1. a SWTOR set series involving my Sith Warrior and just her adventures leading her to actually be more light side than dark. I’m aiming her at Theron Shaan but for now, she’s going to have a slightly abusive, manipulative fling with her overseer. Yes it’s very toxic. That’s the point.
2. Jedi!Maul AU with @thesitharts OC Path
3. Papa Maul and baby Mel AU… I have so many Maul and Path/Mel/Stance🥲
4. An original story called “We Face the Night” involving vampires and elves and mythical beings and just very high fantasy. I might post it on AO3 idk.
5. A series of met gala inspired drawings of my OC’s and those of some friends’. Still need some ideas for @smoooothbrain’s Uro.
TITLE: The Spaces In-Between
RATING: M
PAIRINGS: Eventually Kurt/Blaine, unrequited Kurt/Finn
ADDITIONAL TAGS: All the tags! Mostly slowburn romance and friendship
SUMMARY: The story of Kurt Hummel’s life in the spaces between what we saw on the show – goes through the entire series, and follows his adventures throughout, including falling in love with Blaine, his friendships with Mercedes and Rachel, and his relationship with his dad.
Thanks to @lallagoglee for the wonderful cover art! <3
***
Chapter 7: Keep Holding On
“Move it, gay kid! I have places to be.” Sue Sylvester shouts at Kurt. His lunch tray comes dangerously close to bumping her as she is in the process of storming out of the cafeteria. Kurt steadies his lunch and glares after her. God, he hates that woman.
Gay kid… The phrase makes Kurt’s blood boil. He had been shocked when Ms. Sylvester had first called him that. But now that it is the only thing she will call him has him rolling his eyes so hard at her. He knows what she is doing - purposely equating them to a single trait and doing so in the most insensitive way imaginable. That is how Ms. Sylvester rolls. And if she hadn’t been any other teacher, Kurt would have thrown some snark her way. You did not mess with Ms. Sylvester, though. He had seen the things she had done to Santana and Brittany -- to Mr. Schue. Kurt is not dumb enough to get on her bad side. Still…
“She really needs to pick some new nicknames,” Kurt mutters as he sets his tray down next to Mercedes. He nods over to where Ms. Sylvester is yelling at some poor kid for being in the wrong place at the wrong time and knocking into her.
Mercedes shrugs her shoulders, as if it is no big deal, and pops a tater tot into her mouth. “They could be worse. They’re not as bad as they could be.”
“Really?” Kurt is incredulous. “And you would be fine if Ms. Sylvester started calling you ‘black girl’ every time you walked by?”
Mercedes gives him a glare as she chews. “Well, I am a black girl, and an awesome one at that. I’m not about to let any terrible person use it against me.”
Kurt smiles inwardly. As much as he appreciates Mercedes’s calm approach to everything, it is nice when she gets indigent with him.
“But even so,” Mercedes continues. “Ms. Sylvester isn’t all bad. She is letting us sing solos and as much as I appreciate Mr. Schue for everything he’s done for us. You have to admit, he has been holding us back.”
She is not wrong. Their tiny group of minorities have all had their share of solos to sing in the past week. And it totally beats having to harmonize behind Rachel as she gets free reign on singing every song from the Rodgers and Hammerstein playbook. But, as much as he likes having a chance to change it up a bit, something about the whole arrangement feels… hollow.
“I will be the first to admit, it feels nice to actually be able to sing,” Kurt says carefully. “But what is the trade-off? That we allow Ms. Sylvester to terrorize us? She only reinforces this notion that I’m only ‘the gay kid’.” He uses finger quotations to emphasize his point.
“Well, then what do you want to be?” she says with an easy smile. He grimaces at her deliberate refusal to get the point. She reaches out a hand to him and puts it over her own. “Kurt, we’re never going to escape these labels people put on us. People are always going to judge us before they get to know the real people that we are. And if I dare ask - is being ‘gay kid’ really any better or worse than ‘black girl’ or ‘wheels’ or ‘other Asian’?”
He tilts his head to consider. It is not fair to compare one minority’s suffering to another. It is not fair that they are even put into this position in the first place. And now that he is becoming more comfortable with the fact that he is, indeed, gay… and like, really gay… he is not sure if society labeling him as such feels better or worse.
Mercedes changes the subject to new music they can sing in glee, and he can only admire her ability to adapt when she needs to. He supposes she has had her whole life to adapt to a society that represses her. Not that everyone who has ever met him already just stamps the word ‘gay’ on his forehead. But Mercedes is so much better at dealing with it than he is. Or at least she seems to be.
Ms. Sylvester’s words still echo in his ears, but he lets them go, and indulges in Mercedes’s company.
***
Kurt is in the boy’s locker room, combing his hair in the mirror. Today’s practice had been grueling for the team. Luckily, being the kicker, he does not have to partake much. That is the nice thing about being on Coach Tanaka’s good side. Being the only one to help win a game, he is left pretty much alone - and being solely the kicker means he does not have to run the same drills.
Most of the time, everyone ignores him... And he’s fine with that. He practices a few kicks by himself, imagining the music swirling around him to do so. His record is unblemished, never missing a goal in practice either. The team hasn’t scored a single point since that fateful game but Kurt doesn’t really care either way. He only likes the way his dad gets excited when he says he’s gearing up for a game, or the way Finn gives him a reassuring smile as the game begins.
Kurt does not spend much time in the locker room after practice. The stench alone would send people screaming but, mostly, he does not want to be around the other guys as they all change and shower. It is not that he would look. He knows what male genitalia looks like, and it’s not like there is much appeal in a bunch of dumb jock meatheads. It is them who feel uncomfortable. The way they wrap their towels around their waists just a little tighter. The way they make sure he is not looking as they slip into the shower stalls. It is as if he sees them, they automatically turn gay, too.
Like it could ever work that way.
Kurt takes off his pads and remains in the scrubby clothes he wears underneath them. There is nothing fashionable about high school athletic wear but he will have to make do until he can get home. He grabs his bag from the locker and, while everyone else is goofing off, he tries to sneak out.
Normally, that works. The guys all let him go without another thought. But not apparently that day.
Azimio and Karofsky block the door out, their arms firmly folded over their chests.
“Look who’s trying to skip out on team bonding time,” Azimio laughs.
“Like the two of you want to bond with the gay kid ,” Kurt snarls. Funny enough, it is the first time he has ever referred to himself as such. There is something about taking it back for himself. “Let me through.”
“Ooh, getting sassy, are we?” Karofsky taunts. “What’s your hurry? Need to get home to jack off to the mere thought of all us guys in here?”
Kurt’s stomach turns. “I can’t think of anything grosser.” He tries to push past them but they remain firmly in place.
“Uh, did we say you could go?” Azimio says, putting a hand to his ear. “I don’t think we’ve said anything about letting you leave.”
“You know what, Azimio? I think maybe it’s time we reinstate the classic swirlie,” Karofsky throws his head back with a laugh. “Haven’t done one of those in a lo-ong time.”
He has never had a swirlie and he doesn’t intend to find out what one is like. He thinks back to all the times when he had been thrown in the dumpster and how he had just willingly taken it. While in some ways this is worse - now that he has a firm label on his head rather than just being another loser - he is not going to be that kid anymore. He just refuses to back down to these idiots.
Azimio and Karofsky move in, but Kurt ia too quick for them, doubling back. “You will not touch me,” he screeches, shrill enough to stun the entire room.
“What?” Karofsky says. “Anyone have a problem with us bonding with the gay kid ?”
“You know - if you were smarter, maybe you’d know better than to pick on the one member of this team that’s actually won a game for you,” Kurt throws in his face.
Everyone has eyes on Kurt, yet no one says a word. Finn looks as though he wants to say something but is holding back. Puck just scoffs. Mike stays stiff. Matt slowly shakes his head.
“Or maybe I’ll just let Coach Tanaka know how bonding time is going with the most valuable player on the team, and he’ll have you sitting on the bench,” Kurt continues.
Karofsky makes an undignified grunt as he lunges at Kurt. Kurt easily steps out of the way as Karofsky trips over a knee pad and lands plainly on his face. The entire room erupts in laughter. Even Azimio lets out a chuckle as Karofsky fumbles his way back to standing.
“You guys are pathetic,” Kurt says as he spins on his heel. He darts out of there before anyone else can follow him. He makes it out of the building before he leans against the wall to catch his breath. His adrenaline is flowing. He is still a little scared that they may come after him but at least he did not back down. For once - the gay kid stood up for himself.
I don't think babies are cute. I want kids and have been spending time with peers who have babies. I don't think their kids are cute. I'm worried my own baby won't be cute.
Well, Anon, I can't decide if you came to the right person or the wrong person LOL. Myself, I don't want kids. I like sleep and money and doing whatever I want too much. Also: babies leak everywhere. Every orifice. Just leaks. They're also loud. And needy. Not to mention the whole "getting the baby" thing. Pregnancy and childbirth seem awful. And other means of getting them are just plain expensive and at times sketchy. I could actually write a whole book on why the whole "having kids" thing just isn't for me.
But the important bit is this: you baby might not be cute. Your baby doesn't have to be cute! Babies are not accessories. They are little humans that grow into big humans. Maybe you have an ugly baby that grows up to be a supermodel. Or a little pageant baby that grows up to be...not a supermodel. There are more important things that how cute a baby is. Just like there are more important things than how cute anyone is.
Maybe your baby will love snuggles, or will coo sweetly at you. Maybe your baby will grin all big when they see you. Maybe they're silly. Maybe they grow up to be super creative, or super athletic, or super smart, or all of the above.
Also most fresh from the oven babies aren't that cute anyway. They're much cuter once they've plumped up and have a personality to them!
There is so much you don't know and can't plan for with kids. It's the great chaos of life. How quick and easy will pregnancy happen? How will the pregnancy be? Will they be born healthy? Will they stay healthy? Who will they look like? Who will they act like? Will you bond with the kid right away, or will it have to grow? Will you like the person your kid becomes? You can't promise they'll have blue eyes, or a good sense of humor, or if they'll share your beliefs, or if they have a good fashion sense. No matter how much control you try to assert, or want to assert, you'll never really have it. What you will have is all of this time to nurture another human, and learn about them, and watch them grow. You get first row seats to watching them develop. To see them explore and interact with the world around them. You get to be part of someone's grand adventure of life. That's pretty cool, yeah?
How a person looks doesn't really mean much at all, does it?
So maybe, just maybe, your baby will look like a really pitiful potato. That's alright. It's not "cuteness" I'd wish for, but happiness and health. I hope you have a sweet, silly potato. And I hope your potato grows into a...idk...a really clever, artsy french fry or something. Or a generous and intelligent, uh...hash brown. Or a passionate, optimistic tater tot! Okay I've taken the metaphor too far, but you get what I mean. I hope anyway.
And even if you know, rationally, that other people see a really pitiful potato...maybe you'll love them too much and they'll be too sweet and smiley and snuggly for you to see anything but beauty.
In this food adventure I'm taking on an iconic and legendary sandwich challenge featured on Man vs Food - Jethro's Adam Emmenecker Challenge!
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📍 Ankeny, Iowa (north of Des Moines)
🌟 Jethro’s Adam Emmenecker Sandwich Challenge 🌟
Pork tenderloin 🍖
Buffalo chicken tenders 🐔
Texas brisket meat 🍗
Thick slabs of bacon 🥓
White cheddar sauce 🧀
Fried cheese cubes 🧀🧊
Angus Steak Burger 🍔
Spicy pickle 🔥🥒
This sandwich challenge also comes with 1lb of waffle fries or tater tots 🥔
Time limit ⏳ 15 minutes
🌟 Prizes 🌟
Free Meal ($25 )💰
Free Shirt 👕
Wall of Fame 📸
*Side quest – where if you beat the record in 3 minutes, you get $5000!
✨ Exclusive content and unlock magical perks: https://linktw.in/qxfJr