#so sorry I’m too lazy to actually think of who to tag :’)

[ncteez]

The perks of being that guy (l.jh.)

Taking note of the strangers you see day to day isn’t something you’d normally do. The only reason today is different is because the guy who made small talk as he rang you up for your intimate items was the same guy who showed up catering for your family reunion. 

or the one where jihoon is a dildo salesman, a caterer, a self-titled mechanic, and also your ride home. he is not an expert in any of his jobs, but he sure is an expert in wit and, well, other things. 

ao3 | m.list | reblog to give woozi a lil kiss 

minors dni!! 

WORDCOUNT― 14k

PAIRING― jihoon x afab reader 

CONTENT― strangers to lovers like immediately, long fluffy hair jihoon!!!!,  you buy a monster sized dildo, blatant talking of masturbation and toys, smut, cliche blooming an attachment to someone after (1) fuckening. 

NOTE― a present for u all because i hit a milestone of 5000 followers!! this was only supposed to be like 5k words but i guess i was in love with him this whole time. anyway, this is not proof read bc i think u guys know by now that im not about that life, so if you find a typo– don’t tell me i will delete everything out of embarrassment. 

smut tags under cut:: 

smut tags― it’s kind of fluffy im so sorry i just have feelings for him, average cock size jihoon!!!! he is very much a service top, making out, hand holding, caressing, grinding, finger fucking, titty worship,  unprotected sex (just wrap it guys, im too lazy to write a condom scene), sweet talking as a form of dirty talk, missionary bc i refuse to not write smut where he wants to look directly at you, back scratches (sexual) ~

~

Never have you been put in the position to make small talk about the sex toys you place on a counter to purchase. Then again, you guess it’s part of the job description that most people ignore or aren’t privy to actually doing. 

Never have you been informed of the wide variety of lubricants, additional toy-cleaners, or the bigger and smaller alternatives to your chosen toy. You don’t show discomfort though, because it’s not uncomfortable. Sex is normal, masturbation is more normal, and the man in front of you appears to be normal too.

“There’s twelve different color variants if you prefer something less fleshy.” The man says, standing at the counter with some sort of a permanent pout on his lips. 

“I’m fine with my choice, if you could just ring me up now I can get out of your hair.” You respond, glancing at the time on your phone and wondering how you got stuck with the only employee who actually does his job here.

“Are you sure you don’t want any lubricant…?” The man adds, gazing at the size of your toy and then looking you up and down as if you clearly wouldn’t be able to handle it without said lube purchase. 

The man with no name tag appears to be blissfully unaware of his invasiveness with that question as you tilt your head with a raised brow. Shocked at the very question, it’s actually quite laughable that he’s so monotone with the offensive comment. You imagine he’s done this for so long, he must be a manager trying to get the day over with, going through the steps in a bored mood with little to no regard as to how he must sound to strangers buying their first or twentieth dildo. 

With your assumption that he doesn’t exactly care about the level of wet your vagina is when you use this toy, you respond.

“I think I know what I can take and I already have lube, but thanks.”

He nods, not even sparing you much of a glance before giving you a total and bagging your item.

Now, despite Jihoon’s lack of interest toward the purchase of toys he finds it comical that he’s grown numb to the very fact that he knows everyone in this town’s kinks after they step out of the shop’s door. Someone’s gotta do this job and keep those secrets and he likes to think he fits the bill perfectly. 

Lively as he may be outside of this shop, each job comes with a personality and this one calls for one of disinterest in your product but interest in the sale. He’s not one to lie to himself though, many times a pretty girl has marched in and bought toys far bigger than any man and he does tend to let his mind wander about it from time to time. When he first started this job, bright eyed and bushy-tailed, he found it hard to navigate a single sale without a flush of rosy tints crossing his cheeks and ears. Now, he’s become a veteran at keeping his dick locked in place if he were to feel some type of way about a purchase and the one purchasing. 

Shy as he was when he started, it’s all lost now as he handles dicks and dongs, pocket pussies and anal plugs, even whips and chains. 

Shy. That’s definitely a word and surprisingly one that can describe him when he’s not on schedule within these walls of alien dicks and lime flavored lube to match the grotesque green color. At his other job, because he works two, he takes the praise of being the charming yet, timid man who shows up with pans of food for events. 

The guests seem to love him, and many times during weddings and company parties he has been offered phone numbers or asked for one simply because he appears to be that of a friendly face with a kind sense of being. 

It’s a stark contrast of jobs, and somehow he’s managed to dodge knowing many of the people coming into his night job to shop for ways to fuck themselves. The rare time it had happened, he was thankful to have another person in the shop to ring them up. Keeping up with two jobs is hard, and keeping up with two personalities is even harder.

~

You hadn't thought of that guy from the sex shop even once until he showed his face at your family reunion. 

He noticed you before you managed to realize it was him though. Stealing looks in your direction as you chat with little cousins and elder aunts and uncles, mostly to double check in his brain if you’re really the girl who showed up and nonchalantly bought the newest dildo in stock. The fleshy colored one with rotating beads and a g-spot stimulator button. Upon your eyes meeting his though, he could tell it was you simply by your furrowed brow as you recognized him. 

Jihoon couldn’t help but smirk. He knew that eventually someone at an event would recognize him as their local sex-shop manager, he’s actually shocked it doesn’t happen more often. At least it’s you though, a woman who looks near his age and clearly has a very healthy relationship with her sexuality. So much so that you weren’t shy or nervous in buying the toy from him, because it’s very true that many people feel too vulnerable when buying those kinds of items. 

His smirk doesn’t go unnoticed by you before you look away from him and focus your attention back to your family. And by the time he’s prepared the food and is standing aside to help explain  or describe what ingredients the dishes have, you’re walking up with your empty plate and an awkward glance. 

He follows you down the line, seemingly more interested in you than anyone else. You could argue it’s just an attempt to make you feel embarrassed though.

“Do I know you from somewhere?” You ask, a knowing look telling him that you’re already very aware of that ‘somewhere’ you know him from. 

His pursed lips and snide hidden laugh at you is one thing, but the way he whispers to you over a pan of potato casserole is another. 

“I think you know who I am.” He says, crossing his arms as he leans back again with a flicker of a grin. 

You leave it at that, looking him in the eye curiously and for some reason, smiling back at the strange second encounter with a man who appears to have a name tag now.

“Thanks, Jihoon. See you around.” 

You’re heading away from the table of food and now toward your saved spot at the table of family that you missed the most. Your same-age cousins, the ones you grew up with and made mud pies for your parents with during summer evenings. 

“What was that about?” One of them leans over to ask, glancing to the man who is still overseeing the table of food and maintaining perfect temperatures. 

“Huh? He was just telling me what was in the potatoes.” 

She takes your answer as truth without issue, and the conversation falls away and into something else. College life, job life, family life. 

~

Okay so you’re trying to hear yourself out here. Are you somehow curious and interested in speaking with Jihoon? Yeah. Do you know why? Also yes. For one, he just sold you a fucking interesting sex toy last weekend in the most uncomfortable way possible, and now he’s here at your family reunion to remind you of what you do in your apartment when you’re alone. 

His personality seemed different this time too. He wasn’t monotone, he was snide with you about knowing who you are. He probably thinks it’s funny that he ended up at your family reunion over any other event.

So yeah, maybe you find yourself going up to the table for seconds even though you’re no longer hungry. Maybe you definitely wait until no one else is at the table and he appears to be tidying up the space and wiping up spills. 

“How many jobs do you have?” You ask in a sarcastic tone when you reach him, the table between the two of you creating a comfortable distance to poke and prod.

He jumps only slightly at your presence because he didn’t notice you walking up. Then he’s smiling again, looking at you up and down. 

“Plenty. How much lube do you have left?” He answers before shooting back his own question and getting right to the point. 

You freeze in shock at his question, reminding yourself that his monotone voice from the late dildo purchase is no more and he now comes across as vibrant and charming to you. You check him out for a moment, taking mental notes of what may not be to like about him. Unfortunately, you’re not finding much to take note of. 

“I can’t imagine you have much left, that thing was a fucking monster.” He pauses to cover his mouth, forgetting that he’s supposed to be timid and gentle during his day job. He’s not supposed to be himself.

You find yourself laughing at his panic though, leaning over the table and holding out your empty plate. Mostly just to get in closer to him. 

“Why are you so interested in my ‘fucking monster”’ dildos anyway?” You narrow your eyes. 

He pauses, his panic easing after taking note of your easy personality and banter towards him. 

“I think anyone would be interested, with all things considered.” He checks you out again. “Correction, they should be worried.” 

“You’re different from before,” you comment, both of you now blatantly staring down each other. “I like this version of you more.” 

Something inside of him feels giddy at that. Not to be cliche but he wonders if this is what it’s like to instantly have a crush on someone. Again, he’s not one to lie to himself. You’re pretty and you appear to be confident. Confident enough to discuss this at your own family reunion at least.

“Maybe I’ll see you again sometime then.” He puts a hand forward, inviting you to shake it but you simply stare down at it. 

“Yeah, maybe you will.” You smile, slapping his hand as if you’re low fiving him. 

Honestly, he might actually see you within the next day or two because he was kind of right to ask about how much lube you have left, but it’s not like you’d answer that truthfully if at all. You might be running out after just two uses. He was right again about it being a fucking monster, because well, yeah. Maybe you’ll pop in and shop for bulk lube instead of rejecting his up-sale. 

~

Unfortunately for you, upon the reunion coming to an end, you get into your car and of course it doesn’t start. Your head slamming into the steering wheel with a sigh that’s probably loud enough for the entire town to hear.

The last thing you need is your father driving you home, because he will lecture you about your car and how it’s got to be some fault of your own for it to not start. And you know, yeah maybe it was your fault. Why were your lights turned on during a sunny sunday afternoon? Fuck if you know. Why were they left on for the entire nine hours you spent at your parent’s house? You refuse to ask yourself questions.

Just as you prepare to head back inside, taking the walk of shame ten minutes after saying your goodbyes, a savior appears.

That savior is none other than Jihoon walking up with his stiff button down shirt partially unbuttoned, hair now disheveled as he must have ruffled it up after the day of work. He watched you from his catering van for just a few minutes before finally getting out to offer his expertise. 

“The battery is dead.” He smiles, slapping both palms on your hood and leaning to look at you through the windshield. 

“Smart man, can you un-dead my battery before my dad comes out?”

Jihoon shakes his head apologetically. 

“I already checked the van for the cables, could be a write up on my part for not checking before leaving. We are supposed to have all sorts of shit to prevent breakdowns on a job. Not today though, apparently.” He scratches the back of his neck as he walks to your opened car door. 

“If you can hang tight for like ten minutes I can swing by after dropping the van off.”

Your eyes plead with him. You’d prefer this, yes. If he’s willing to help, you’re willing to accept.

“You sure I’m too out of the way for you to do that?”

He shakes his head nonchalantly, waving you off as he leans into your car to pull your keys out of the ignition. He smells like food, obviously he does, but there’s a scent of something else on him that’s far more attractive. The dull scent of cologne that matches him all too well. 

“Don’t try to turn it on anymore if you don’t want your dad coming out.” He laughs. “I’m sure he would help you but if you’d rather I help you, I am more than happy to do it.”

He’s teasing. His little crush pushes him to want to help you, but he’s gonna play it off as casually as possible. 

“I’ll hang out here. My dad would lecture the fuck out of me.”

Jihoon nods, backing away and heading back to his van to fulfill his offer.

On another note, you’re shocked that your father didn’t hear the commotion, and even more shocked that he didn’t step outside once since the reunion ended. He must have been tired, and you know him, he sleeps like a rock even if he hits the sack at 7pm without even cleaning up the yard. 

~

“Oh, it’s dead dead.” Jihoon looks at you apologetically, peeking his head out from the side of your hood and through your window. 

“Define dead dead.” You comment, taking your keys out of the ignition with a huff. 

“Like, you need a new battery. This one is done for.”

You sigh loudly, knowing that now you’ll have to go ask your parents for a ride home. Know that your dad is going to add more to his lectures with each day your car is sitting in their driveway. This is so fucking annoying. At least you work from home though, so it’s not like you’re gonna lose your job over this or anything. 

Jihoon unhooks the cables and turns off his car, then stands there and watches you for a moment. You look frustrated and annoyed, and it’s very much like him to offer more help. Of course it is. 

“Would it be too forward to ask if you need a ride home?” 

You look at him confused, tilting your head and studying his body language much like before. You’re not one to decline someone making your life a little bit easier, and he is interesting to talk to. You nod slowly, then pause.

“You’ve worked all day, don’t waste your off-time helping me out.”

“I’m already wasting my off time on you though, might as well let me drive you home too?”

You stare at him. 

“Okay.”

The awkward silence sets in shortly after you seat yourself in his car. You fill that silence with small sarcastic comments about his car though, and soon it becomes easy to be in the space with him.

“Where did this sticker come from?” You ask, poking your finger into a sticker with its edges rolled from the summer heat, probably.

“Ex girlfriend, i couldn’t get it off without it leaving a residue so I’m just letting the sun do its job and melt it off.”

“Oh, harsh.” You laugh, wanting to prod further. “Why’d you break up?”

Jihoon pauses, you can tell by the way his foot lets up from the gas momentarily that he wasn’t expecting you to ask that. Then again, he’s said some weird shit to you too, so you figure it’s not an end-all question. 

“Was that too forward to ask?” 

“Not at all, just wasn’t expecting it,” He shakes his head with a small smile, nearly reaching his hand from the wheel to pat your leg in reassurance. He holds back, wondering why the fuck that urge felt so normal for him to do. “It’s been like a year, so I’m over it and stuff. She just thought I worked too much and didn’t spend enough time with her.”

“Ouch, even harsher.” You smile in reassurance to him, also feeling it normal to want to do that for some reason. “Her loss, I mean, discounted dildos and food? Huge loss.”

He laughs at your comments, briefly looking over at you once he stops at a red light. Your eyes are shining with life, with interest even. At that moment, he feels something between the two of you. Which is quite strange considering this is your first time officially meeting him outside of his working hours. He can’t help the way his face softens though, it happens against his will, honestly, it does. 

“You’re kind of cute,” You blurt, breaking eye contact with him and shifting in your seat. “and fun to hang out with.” 

“Hang out?” He laughs at you, eyes now adjusting back to the road and lowering his speed just to have a bit more time with you. “This is hardly a hang-out, but if you’re interested, I’m more than willing to check my schedule to see when I’m free next.”

You feel confidence raise up in your chest, bubbling to be free in the form of a question likely too bold to actually consider.

“You’re free right now…” You comment quietly, glancing at him. 

“Hm?” He asks, tightening his grip on the steering wheel and feeling your eyes on him. He heard you, but he wouldn’t mind hearing you repeat it.

“I said, you’re free right now.” You repeat, this time with more confidence. “Would it be too forward to ask if –”

“Nothing is too forward to ask, I literally sold you a dildo.” 

You pause in shock, all thoughts leaving your head.

“Damn, alright,” You laugh, feeling kind of warm inside at how his forwardness matches your own. “If you’re free right now, we could hang out right now.” 

How lucky for both of you. He’s actually not catering tomorrow and only has to be at work at the good ol’ sex shop in the evening. 

“Alright,” He nods, glancing over to you. “Kind of fucked up we are hanging out after I met your entire family and still haven’t gotten a name from you yet though, wouldn’t you think?” 

Oh fuck, he’s right. 

“I’m sure you heard the kids yelling it all day. Don’t be dramatic.”

He laughs, already in love with the idea of spending more time with you. 

“Where to then, y/n?” 

~

If your parents were to ask why you’re walking through your apartment building with the caterer following behind you, you’d have no excuse. Then again, as an adult, you don’t think you need one. It’s strange despite how open and casual you are with making friends though, because you never just invite strangers to your place for friendship. Not at least without hanging out a few times. 

You guess it’s not super awkward because it’s true that he already knows things about you that your family doesn’t. Such as, the things you penetrate yourself with when you’re alone. It’s a major ice breaker, and something that makes the friendship with him come easy even after barely talking to the guy.

The few words you have shared have been easy and fun, so it’s only natural that if your instinct is to want to be around him a little longer, you’d invite him in right? You weren’t really expecting him to accept your answer to his question. 

“Where to then?” 

You thought for a moment when he asked that. You don’t go to clubs or bars anymore, most places would have been closing within the hour, and it’s not like you didn’t eat to peak fullness during the family reunion so having a late dinner with him was out of the question too. You answered him so easily, and he accepted in a way that seemed just as natural to him. 

“We could just hang out at my place, I’ve got plenty of streaming services, a gaming system, and wine.”

“Sounds good.” 

It was so easy to become friends with him, and now with him following you up to your apartment, the typical awkwardness that should come with this type of thing isn’t swarming your mind at all. He’s even making small talk about the building itself after parking in your parking spot. 

“This building is way nicer than mine, you got a door code and everything just to get in.”

“Wasn’t always like this. Being a single woman in a city like this calls for safety measures though.”

A little box in his head checks out. He didn’t even have to ask if you’re single, because he already assumed you were with the way you so easily invited him over. 

By the time you get to your door with him, he’s polite when he walks in and takes off his shoes. Polite in the way he looks around and studies your space, even polite in the way he walks into the living room and invites himself onto your couch and grabs your remote. 

“I was going to say make yourself comfortable but–”

“Well, would you prefer I sit on your floor?” He shoots back with a sarcastic tone in his voice. “Would you prefer I start digging through your cabinets for snacks? Would you prefer–”

“You’re so much more talkative when I’m not trying to buy something from you.” You comment with a laugh, dipping into the kitchen for two glasses and that cheap bottle of wine. 

“Speaking of, do you actually use that thing and like it? I mean, I see some weird purchases but that specific one is super popular with the fetish groups.”

For the first time, you feel heat rise to your cheeks. You should have known that the sex toy would be a point of conversation, considering the first time you ever met was buying it. 

“Yes, I use it. I’m surprised you find it shocking considering it’s literally your job to know what people like in terms of getting off.”

He smiles at that, because you’re damn right he knows. Most of the time he would prefer not to know, but he always did wonder if, on the off chance, he ended up hooking up with a customer he’d have some prior knowledge of how they like it based on toys alone. 

“You know, no one buys toys on a Monday at nine in the morning.” 

“I buy toys at nine in the morning on a Monday,” You chuckle, carrying the two glasses and wine into the living room and plopping down next to him. “Why does that matter? I’m sure you make your quotas even on the slow days considering how hard you were trying to up-sell me.”

He shrugs as he watches you pour him a glass. 

“It’s easy to up-sell when you know people’s kinks after a few purchases. I do that to everyone just to gauge what they need so if they come back I can make more offers.”

“A true salesman.” You laugh with a pitied voice. “What would you say my kink is?”

He studies you, looking you up and down without shame and thinking hard about your single purchase. 

“Well, considering that specific item is, again, usually looked at by a specific type of person or couple, I’d say–”

“Wrong.” You interrupt before he even tries to make a guess. “I don’t have a kink, I just have a sex drive.”

You take a sip at his silence of being beaten to the punch, and then he takes his own thoughtful sip. 

“Okay then, What do you think my kink is?” He asks slyly, cup still against his lips as he sips again. 

“Wha–” You narrow your eyes. “Hell if I know, you probably don’t even have sex after being in a hyper-sexualized space like that for hours on end.”

“Wrong.” He pokes his tongue into his cheek and looks away from you with another casual chuckle.

“Are you telling me you have a pocket pussy or like, a buttplug or something?”

“Three pocket pussies, actually.”

You don’t know why you’re shocked. For some reason his sex toys becoming the focus makes you feel more shy than your own being the focus. 

“I bet you named them.”

“Pocket 1, Butthole 1, and Jessica.”

“Jessca?!” 

He nods in a matter-of-fact tone with a proud smile. 

You feel comfortable around him, never having a friend who openly talks to you about these things without any type of awkwardness. It’s the fact that he’s a man too. Usually they think with their dicks and he seems to have no qualms in admitting that it’s something he may do from time to time too. 

You imagine he needs this type of personality to work such a job though, being casual about sex can be so difficult for your average joe because for some reason, it is embarrassing. It’s hard to talk about even to sex-shop employees. You like to think he’s probably someone who makes others feel comfortable about their sexual habits though, because you feel comfortable. 

“I’m lying by the way.” He cuts through your thoughts, “I only have two.” 

You nod energetically. 

“Jesse and James.” 

“Oh my god, how did you know that?” 

You narrow your eyes again. He’s gotta be a fucking nerd to get the reference, even if everyone knows what pokemon is. 

“So the pussy is Jesse, and the asshole is James.” 

He nods slowly, acting surprised before smirking yet again. 

“Actually, I only have one but I’ve experimented with other things that come through the door. Might as well, right?”

“And yet, you’re shocked about my single dildo purchase without knowing of my other items of interest? I could have just been trying something new too, y’know.”

Another sip of wine, and another glance away from him.

“No one buys that as a first time experience.” He shoots back.

“Okay, enough about my dildo, I actually have a question about something you might have in stock but I’ve kind of been too embarrassed to ask until now.”

He nods, his personality shifting only slightly into that as the manager of the sex-shop.

“Shoot.”

“Do you guys have like,” you pause, unsure of why you’re even trying to ask. Again, it’s not like masturbation is embarrassing, nor is the purchasing of toys. Asking for a specific item is a bit too intimate to you though, so you usually just buy those things online. “Okay hear me out.”

“Tentacles? Furry buttplugs with tails attached? Bondage rope? Paddles?”

“No…” You pause at his spewing of different types of toys. “I know you have all of that.”

He pauses, unsure of what could be so embarrassing. 

“Do you guys have sex dolls for women? You know, like, just a dude torso with a normal length and girth?”

Jihoon fucking snorts. How mundane. Unfortunately for you though, Nope. 

“Nah, the owner tries to cater more towards men and fetish stuff. We’ve got women sex dolls but he’s never really even mentioned just like…a dildo attached to some sort of form that is shaped like a person.”

You shrug. 

“Guess sticking it to the wall is all I can do for now then. But like,” You pause, realizing that you’re actually going into detail at this point, which might be a little uncomfortable for him? Maybe? “It’s really annoying to have it sticking to the floor, and you’re like, riding it and it just pops off and stabs your thigh slipping out mid-orgasm.”

He snorts again, this time unable to stop laughing at the image of whatever orgasm instilled the frustration in you to even mention that happening. He tries to stifle his laughter with the last sip of his wine before choking it down and pushing his glass at you for more. 

“Noted,” He snorts, nodding his head and almost hiding his face from you. “I’ll tell the boss we need male sex dolls so the women don’t get thigh fucked mid-orgasm.”

You glare. 

“Dude, no, because it actually hurt.”

“Maybe you should slow down next time so the full force of your…” he pauses, realizing how sexual the image in his head is of you right now. 

“Okay, wait. I’m sorry, is this conversation too much right now?” You ask, looking him up and down and giving him a new glass of wine. “You’re blushing.”

He tries to play it off. 

“As if you could make me blush.” He laughs at you, downing half of his glass in one go. “To make up for our lack of product though, and if you don’t tell anyone, I’ll give you a discount on your next purchase just for embarrassing yourself like that just now.”

“Oh, I was supposed to be embarrassed?” You counter, laughing along with him as you actually start to look at him.

You noticed that he was handsome before. Normally employees of shops like those are nonchalant normal people, or strange old men who try to impose their kinks onto you. Jihoon though. Jihoon. Hmm, how to explain him?

With his messy hair that covers his eyes every time he whips his head toward you in a laugh, with his wide smile and pretty eyes. He may not be the tallest man you’ve ever looked at like this but damn is he thick. Like his thighs. Damn, the thighs. Even him now  compared to him when he was catering for your family, he’s so much more handsome.

His shoulders are broad, and he’s just… You don’t even know how to explain to yourself the attraction you have toward him at this moment. Handsome is one thing, and you would have continued calling him that if it weren’t for the fact that he’s laughing with you on your couch about a ruined orgasm. 

“You know, Jihoon,” You start, looking into your glass and swirling the liquid inside, then you look up again and make eye contact. “I’m really not usually this forward but like,”

His brain stops for a moment at the serious tone in your voice, his expression softens and you can tell he’s listening. 

“I know masturbation and stuff is normal, and like, you see and talk about these things all the time but I never really talk about it to other people, they always get weird about it.”

“Yeah, I guess that’s true. I can’t say this is the most normal hang out I've ever had. Usually we talk about our favorite movies or books or something.”

You wave him off. 

“Yeah, that’s a good point. We could talk about our favorite movies but I find myself, um–” You stop for a second. 

“Is talking about it making you realize that it’s uncomfortable?” 

“No, the opposite actually.” You laugh, now actually feeling embarrassed. “I keep thinking about you mentioning the other things you’ve bought and experimented with.”

“Oh? You’re curious?” He laughs, now feeling a bit shy himself because he’s pretty sure that’s you asking him to put images in your head. “I mean I could go into detail but it actually might be too-telling right now.”

You nod, unsure of why you even suggested.

“Maybe next time?” You change the subject with a smile, one that does seem slightly disappointed. 

“There’s a next time?” He smiles, setting his glass down on your table and shifting toward you.

“I don’t see why not? I’m having fun, plus you offered me a discount.”

He nods, looking around the room and checking the time. 

“I should probably head out then? We’ve both had a long day.” 

You nod back to him, feeling a bit sad. 

“When are you free next?” You ask, grabbing your phone in a way that seems a bit too excited. “Can you give me your number?”

He obliges, exchanging phone numbers and promising to contact you with his next free day or night to hang out. 

Just as he goes to leave though, for some reason both of you feel as though the satisfaction of this hang out wasn’t reaching full potential. 

“Hey, um,” He stops before he puts his shoes back on. “Would it be too forward to say I’m not tired and wouldn’t mind–”

“Staying for a bit longer?” You finish his sentence for him, patting the couch as if that was also on your mind.

He doesn’t even respond, and instead makes his way back onto the couch where the cushion is still warm, unable to help that fluttering feeling in his chest.

~

It's almost midnight by the time he offers to leave again, and yet, he stays at your clear disappointment of the offer. Another hour later, the two of you are sitting contently and pretending to watch some shitty tv show in comfortable silence.

“We should say something.” He blurts, mid episode.

“What do you mean?”

He turns toward you. 

“We should talk about this.” He motions at the space between the two of you. 

You’re silent while you try to build up the confidence to meet him half-way again. 

“You can correct me if you’re not interested but I actually really would like it if you kissed me or something.” He adds as you continue to process what he seems to be getting at.

You’re taken aback by his forwardness, and instantly you knew he didn’t communicate this earlier for your own sake. Thankfully, you’ve tried to make it easy for him to read you and he ate it up like his favorite book. The content feeling between the two of you was buzzing up to this point. Very loudly in your brain where you were thinking of how to kiss him before the night is up. Even as just a “thank you” if he were to turn away from it. 

“Oh yeah?” You ask, tilting your head and seeing him scoot closer. “Kiss you, or something?”

He nods his head, looking at you without much issue and searching for a reaction. 

“Are you interested in me like that, in any way?” He asks, looking for confirmation.

“Oh, most definitely.”

The smile that spreads across his face is one that you can argue will be unforgettable. It’s an expression you hope to bring to every person in your life, one that seems to express nothing but relief, excitement, and maybe even a hint of bashfulness.

“You thought I'd invite you inside without being interested?” You smile at him, feeling a little bit fuzzy in the head at the admittance. 

“I thought you were just being nice, or like, just interested in friendship,” He rambles on, stopping himself short to give more context to that statement. “I mean, it would be fine if this was all for friendship and I'm happy with that too but I can admit to coming into your apartment with maybe, uh, a small crush.” 

“I can admit to inviting you in with a small crush, maybe.” 

“Maybe.”

“Are we being too forward?” You ask, emphasizing the repetitive way that word seems to appear. “Even though you’re in my apartment at one in the morning and both of us are giving any and every excuse to keep you here?”

He smiles this time in a way that appears to be self-soothing, and you can imagine you are too. It’s always nerve-wracking to walk on eggshells with another person, the threat of wondering if you'll fall alone or fall with them into a new version of partnership. 

You don’t think about the lack of knowing him past a purchase, a quick conversation at a family reunion, or the past several hours he’s huddled up with you on this couch. You simply don’t think it’s strange at this point. After all, you’ve met people online and invited them over without much more than a name, age, and quick conversation about what they want sexually. How is this worse? How is this strange? 

“You’re right. Maybe we should stop being so polite when the reality of it is that I’ve been imagining what you’ve done with that toy since the day you bought it.” 

Okay, maybe that was too forward but all is lost now as your image of him changes drastically within the mere seconds it took him to say that, not in a bad way either. Again, of course he’s comfortable admitting it, the dude stares at dicks and holes all day. But now he’s staring at you, and talking directly to you.

Your silence makes him shift a bit, shaking his head apologetically. 

“Found the boundary, got it.” He shames himself with a timid voice, looking away from you and back to the tv with a hint of embarrassment. “I’m not lying though.” He adds after a few more minutes of your silence.

“Not much of a boundary if I admit that I was blatantly asking you earlier what you’ve done to experiment with your toys.”

“Aha! So I was right in thinking you were straight up asking for mind-porn of me?!” He feels instantly comfortable again, turning his entire body toward you as he folds up one of his legs to sit on with a little bounce. 

“Maybe, but what do you mean you’ve been imagining since I bought it? You barely made eye contact with me that day.”

“Oh, I was checking you out the whole time you shopped. Imagine my face when I knew exactly what toy you were reaching for.”

You shove him by the shoulder with a laugh, realizing that this is the first bodily contact you’ve ever had with him, but he actually leans into your shove rather than out of it. Meaning, he barely budges. 

“If I looked you in the eye at the register, you would have thought I was some pervert.” 

“You are a pervert. You said it had, what? Twelve other colors?” 

He shrugs with a pained smile at how cringe he must have sounded to you. 

“You seemed more like a sparkly pink girl rather than a normal flesh tone girl. Then again, this was before I knew you were looking for a literal male sex doll for probably super normal pretend-sex.”

You shove him again, your laugh coming out more forced now at the way he jokes with you. Once again, he doesn’t budge. In fact, he’s leaning in closer. 

“Now hold on, you didn’t mention anything about one having glitter in it.” You joke, wiggling your brows. 

“You trying to fuck a man or a magic unicorn?” He laughs yet again, all of it coming out more forced as the two of you drag out information just to hear the dirty words in a voice you’re only just realizing you like far too much. 

“A man.” You respond, this time not laughing, looking him dead in the eye and trying to pretend you don’t notice how close the two of you have gotten. “Why else would I go for more human skin tones?”

“Fuck if I know, I haven’t met a single man who has vibration settings or rolling beads though.” 

You snort. 

“Shame…but also, why do you think I’m on the hunt for the most mundane sex toy a woman can buy now? The rolling beads almost had me passing out.” 

“Was it too much?” He asks seriously, hoping to god it was. 

“A little bit, yeah.”

“I can imagine you want something to feel real after that.”

For some reason, his words hit you straight in the gut. Your stomach drops as your attraction heightens, and suddenly you’re just staring at him as you respond. 

“I can imagine so, yeah.” 

He stares back, almost no space between the two of you as the banter only brought you both mentally and physically as close as possible without becoming twisted together. 

“When was the last time you felt something real?” He asks against his better judgment, wondering if you’re on the same page with him. Wondering if all this banter was leading to somewhere or nowhere. Because he could have sworn admitting to wanting you to kiss him, and you’ve yet to do so. 

“A month and a half.” You respond dryly, suddenly needing something to drink. 

He glances down at your neck when you swallow around your words, then stares at your lips before breathing in a sigh. One that was supposed to relieve the tension in this moment, but only building it more because he knows you see him do it. He knows you see him wet his bottom lip too.

“Are you going to kiss me, or are you planning to wait another month and a half to get what you want?” He continues on his streak of boldness as if to distract you from noticing the sexual tension, feeling his heart skip beats at the intensity of the moment. 

“It’s not like we have anything better to do.” You start, leaning in and still looking straight into his eyes.

“Are you suggesting that I’m boring?” He narrows his eyes as he feels your breath against his lips, still sweet from the wine that did close to nothing in terms of altering the brain. The two of you are totally planted into reality, if anything, a little drunk on the other. 

“Not at all.” You adjust your words from earlier, there, just hovering over his lips. “I’m just saying that nothing is more interesting than kissing you right now.”

Oh, the fluttering in his belly is so fucking intense right now. No eighteen inch alien tentacle dildo on a shelf could scare him as much as you do at this moment. Intimidatingly outspoken and aware of your wants and needs. His eyelashes flutter just like his stomach does, closing them slowly until he can feel your lips on his. 

Your stomach, on the other hand, has been doing flips since the first instance he admitted to wanting to stay. All of the tension, all of the comfortable silence, all of the glances, the smiles, the laughing, all of it was leading up to this. The moment your lips hit his, they feel much like you imagined they would. 

Soft, plush, warm. The thin lipped grins he’s given you all fucking day now laying flat against your own lips, no longer grinning, now just wanting. And he’s gentle, so fucking gentle with it. Never has a man asked you to kiss him. Usually they close the gap to try and swoon you. It appears you’re both being swooned by each other at the moment though, and his soft kiss only pulls back momentarily before he leans forward, closer.

The third touch, save for you shoving him, his lips on yours, and now…his hand on your cheek. Caressing so gently as he deepens the kiss with ease. The heat rises up and through your skin at the simple touch. You think he must feel it with the way he chuckles into the kiss and starts peppering them against your lips over and over again. A split second between each lay of his lips, and then another solid kiss. One where you finally start moving yours too.

It’s slow and languid in the way he kisses you like this, barely even darting his tongue out but focusing more on your cheek against his palm. He can feel your jaw move as you kiss and can’t help but love what’s happening, and when you’re the one to lick against his lower lip, he falls in so easily. 

That little movement from you, that little feeling of your tongue experimentally prodding his lips open releases the last bit of tension holding him back. He pulls back to look at you and you’re not backing down even slightly. 

“Does this feel more real for you?” He asks in a snide way, swiping your bottom lip with his thumb of the glistening saliva before tilting his head with a smile. 

You very nearly roll your eyes at him for that. And by very nearly, you do roll your eyes at him and can’t help but smile yet again. 

“I’ll take that as a yes,” He says, palm still against your cheek, tips of his fingers toying with the baby hairs on your hair-line. “because I can imagine that the toy couldn’t ki-”

You shoot forward to kiss him again, only just realizing how awkward the positioning is considering neither of you were probably expecting more than a first kiss. 

He laughs into it, knowing you were silencing him of something that could arguably be the most cringe-worthy thing he can say after kissing you. His laughs start to stifle though, as you press forward and somehow manage to have his back against the seat of the couch and you planting yourself on top of him. 

“Can you shut up about the toy now? I thought we got past that,” You argue as you pull back, your cheek already missing the feeling of his palm against it. “You can’t just act like this and then say some dumb shit like that.”

You’re joking, he knows it. If anything, you’re complimenting him right now and he eats it the fuck up as he stares up at you. 

“Was I wrong though? Can it do this for you?” 

You take a moment to look at him, realizing that this is the man who you just kissed. With his hair a mess and fanned out onto the cushions, strands falling in front of his eyes, but mostly swept back and exposing the entirety of his forehead to you. 

You reach forward and brush a strand from his eyes. 

“Actually, say what you want.” You correct yourself and manage to ignore his question.

“Why the sudden change of heart?” He half-chuckles as he brings his hands up to set against your waist, hoping you don’t pull out of the intimate position the two of you are in. 

“I don’t know, I was just looking at you and thought it was stupid for me to try to argue with you right now.”

“Why’s that?” He prods for more compliments, feeling himself twitch at the way you look hovering over him. 

“Are you trying to argue right now?” You tilt your head, adjusting yourself now to sit directly on his thighs and lay forward, both hands cushioning your chin on his chest as you straddle him. 

“Would it be so wrong to admit that you’re fun when you argue with me?” 

You can feel him breathe under you, nearly rocking you further and further into whatever headspace Jihoon seems to put you in. It’s too comfortable, and it almost feels as though you’ve been with him for years now. You barely know him, yet you’re lying on him as if you got married two years ago. Insane how this works. How the heart works, or the brain, or whatever drives the arousal you’re feeling right now. 

“Will you argue if I ask to show you my room?” You start, lifting back up and away from his chest, now scooting forward a bit. You don’t dare sit on it yet, but you very much would like to if he were to suggest not moving at all from this couch. “My bed.”

He stutters and quickly quiets his excited words, replacing his voice with a nod and a sharp inhale.

“Hah! Telling me to argue and instantly buckling the second I mention my bed.” You laugh, pulling yourself up and sauntering out of his view.

He stares at the ceiling for a moment, in a daze over just how much he likes you. He wonders, would you be shocked to know he hasn’t had sex in much longer compared to you? One and a half months for you? That’s nothing to him. He’s been besties with his right hand for at least six months by now. Trust him when he says that it truly was difficult to not turn into a hormonal idiot when he saw you in the shop that day. 

Finally, he shakes himself out of the spaced out horny brain staring at your ceiling and stands to his feet. He’s quick to adjust the bulge in his jeans, uncomfortably shaking his leg before looking toward where you walked off to.

“Um.” He stops realizing you were watching him, looking directly at the spot he just adjusted. “I mean,” He tries to start again, adjusting again as he feels it slowly move out from its tucked place. “Listen,”

“No, I get it.” You say, snickering at his embarrassment as if he somehow doesn’t know you were suggesting at least some foreplay by moving to your room.

“Of course you do,” He drops his head, now blatantly shoving his hands down his pants to adjust before looking back up and taking a step forward. “You’re the one who sat on me like that.”

“Please, I didn’t even sit on it.” 

“Didn’t need to.” He shrugs, now coming up to you and waiting for you to guide him through your space and into your room. 

Once the two of you get there, him not even attempting to hide that he is very aroused at this moment, you’re very quick to turn to face him once he comes inside. 

“We are on the same page, right?” You ask, looking at his lips and the way they still look so kissable. 

“As far as I know, with all things considered.” He responds, looking down at himself and how pathetic he must seem in getting so aroused by nothing more than a kiss and a position change. 

You smile, reaching for his hand and watching him tumble forward to you. Now standing mere inches in front of you. 

“Do you want to see it?” You ask, a cheeky smirk on your face as you turn away from him and run to your bedside table. 

He had no idea what the fuck you were referring to until he saw it. There, in all of its non-human glory. Jihoon tics his tongue, curiously straining his neck out to peek at what else is in your drawer as he walks closer. 

You make no attempt to close the drawer and instead pull out another one, and another one, another one.

“If you keep pulling out toys I’ll start to think you were lying in saying you wanted to feel something more, um–”

“Real?” You say, turning from your presented line-up of toys to look at him. 

He nods, gazing over the toys, four dildos all far bigger than he is. 

“I can admit that men can’t vibrate, nor do they have those little rotating beats but,” You chuckle at the conversation, scooping the toys up quicker than you laid them out and tossing them back into the drawer. “They’re not warm, or attached to someone that can kiss me. They’re also not witty.”

You study his expression.

“They don’t make me laugh before getting me off.” You continue, wondering if you may actually be too forward about this now. 

He’s rendered a bit speechless, which is rare for him in any given situation. He always has a quick response, not at this moment though as he looks at you. He wonders if you pity that obvious act of self-doubt upon seeing your toys. 

“They’re not attached to you.” You add, this time stifling your chuckle, because it’s a pretty funny conversation if you look at it from the outside but you can imagine he must be feeling some type of way to be so quiet.

He thinks hard about it, knowing damn well where this was leading and pushing for it himself. Hearing you now though, so confidently say these things, all doubt erases from his mind. 

“Before we do anything,” he starts, his shaky voice coming out more confident as he continues. “Is this just a hook-up to you or are you feeling the way I’m feeling right now?”

You look at him with a question in your eyes. He was kind of shocked that you didn’t finish for him this time, actually. 

“Like, you know if we do this, I’m going to be calling to take you out to dinner at some point unless you say you don’t want me to, right?”

You hadn’t thought of anything past him since you’ve gotten here. You didn’t think about anything more than hanging out with him, and now, kissing him, and maybe you know, feeling him. For some reason though, despite the lack of sex you’ve had lately, him saying that only arouses you more. It’s been so long since you’ve intended to sleep with someone and have them want to stick around after. Some of the people you’ve been with didn’t even ask for your number. Is this what adult relationships are actually like? 

“As in, you’d want to see where this goes in the–”

“Future, yes. I’m not just going to fuck you and pretend I didn’t when I see you again.”

Shockingly, that’s a first for you and you like the feeling it gives you. Plus, him implying that he’s about to, or very willing to, fuck you sends a wave of fondness through you.

“Alright. Let’s not call it a hook up then.” You say, the playful arousal from before stifling out at the idea of being intimate with someone who is making you aware that you’ll see him again, now being replaced with…feelings? Arousal with feelings?

“What should we call it?” 

“A date?” You say back immediately, sitting on your bed and finally closing your bedside drawer. 

“Oh, you fuck on the first date?” 

You laugh at how quickly his wit comes back, especially with the way he crowds up and stands in front of you. 

“With you? I guess I do.” You smile wide for him, feeling the tension bleed away and replace itself again with the arousal of him standing and looking down at you. 

“How did we not meet earlier?” He asks, leaning down a bit as if to kiss you.

“Fuck if I know, I bought all of those toys at your shop.”

“Ah, right. Nine in the morning on a Monday. I don’t usually work mornings.”

“Guess I got lucky last time then.”

“I guess you did.” He adds like a period to a sentence, finally kissing you again and making no effort to hide the fact that he’s attempting to lay you down much like you did to him before. 

You let him, falling back on your bed and feeling him nudge your legs to spread. Again, you let him, feeling your heart begin to race with excitement in the way he kisses you now versus how he did it earlier. 

There is clear intent behind it this time, as he positions himself between your legs. Your heart only races faster when one of his hands slides down your shoulder and he tangles his fingers with yours. It’s all very intimate to be coming from a man you officially met today, but you really do feel lucky. 

Lucky that he works two jobs, lucky that your family throws lame ass reunions every five years, lucky that you had your lights on during a sunny sunday afternoon, lucky that your battery died. 

It’s so normal already to smile into the kiss and feel giddy inside. Never have you smiled into a kiss save for laughing when a leg cramp happens mid-fuck. You can’t believe how much you’ve smiled and laughed today, and you can’t believe he’s making you react this way just by holding your fucking hand and kissing you this way. 

He laughs when you react though, probably feeling at ease on your bed with you under him, squeezing his fingers tightly each time he licks against your tongue. And when he pulls back to breathe, you just look at him and the way his fringe hangs. He looks so pretty at this angle, even when he’s moving slowly, even when his other hand remains planted beside your head to hold his weight from falling onto you. 

It’s not been since highschool that you’ve laid with someone simply making out, fully clothed, giggling. You’re unsure of how he’s pulled this out of you, because usually when a man is on top of you, you’re already trying to get his clothes off. But this? This is something that you want to last. You want it to be slower than a usual fuck, because you like when he’s here with you. Whether on top of you or not, there was a reason he’s stayed this late already and you already know it wasn’t solely to fuck you.

“Did you expect to be on top of me someday?” You ask between kisses, and he takes that as an invitation to laugh against your neck and tickle your cheek with his messy hair. 

“Expect it? No,” He starts, leaving a kiss just under your ear before lowering his lips to the collar of your shirt and kissing there too. “Hoped I could, though.” 

Your heart swells up at that. You realized he must have meant it when he admitted to having a small crush on you. Only now do you realize that curiosity that brought you back up to the food-table during the reunion may have been the start of a crush on your end too. 

You don’t say anything more after that and instead fall into the feeling of his lips kissing alone your collar. For some reason the sensation of his lips pushing the fabric out of the way so he can kiss new exposed skin makes you feel incredibly wanted. Maybe it’s the pace, or maybe it’s just because you really really like him, and want him to want you. 

“Do you want to take it off?” You ask after a few more of his kisses, wanting to control yourself but also very much wanting to feel his lips everywhere else too. 

You can feel him nod in the form of his hair tickling your cheek more. But he doesn’t move from that spot at first, continuing to kiss you the same way and in the same places. You let him, up until he finally sighs and pulls back. 

Looking at him now, even compared to a few moments ago, he looks so fucking pretty. His eyes are now soft, you can almost see the lines from where he’s smiled for you all day at the creases of them. His lips, looking more kissable than they did the past two times you thought they looked as kissable as they ever could. His eyebrows, showing no signs of tension.

You’re staring and you’re not intending to hide it. Even as he lifts your shirt from your waist and starts to pull it up. You barely budge as you stare, and stare, until you can’t because he’s trying to pull your shirt over you head.

“If you’d stop staring for two seconds maybe I could get this off of you, yeah?” He laughs, finally pulling it off when you arch your back and then prop yourself up slightly with your hands. “There.”

He sighs when he says it, going silent and almost frozen at the image of your nearly-naked torso. You watch him stare now, a smirk forming all too quickly.

“Now look who’s staring.” You chuckle, noting that his eyes still don’t leave the newly exposed skin or the fabric of your bra.

“Yeah, I am.” He admits, wetting his lower lip again and then flicking his eyes to you. “Am I not supposed to?”

Suddenly, that eye contact makes you feel shy. You’re more naked than he is, despite mostly being dressed still.

“You know,” you start, avoiding his intense eye contact just to get the words out. “If we just take all of our clothes off now, it would probably be easier.”

He lets out a breathy chuckle at you but nods, already lifting his shirt off and going for his zipper and button.

“There’s no rush, but if you’d prefer we do,” He scoots back and away from you, standing to his feet to shove his jeans down his legs. “I don’t mind.”

You watch him undress and lose all ability to act on your own for a solid thirty seconds before you finally start panic-shimming the rest of your clothing off. Save for bra and panties, and he, now standing there clad in only a pair of form-fitting briefs. 

You’re glad he isn’t as shy as you at this moment though, or rather, he appears to be entirely infatuated with your body and doesn’t look away from it for even a moment to feel embarrassed himself at standing on the side of your bed nearly nude. 

“No rush?” You ask, when he finally trails his eyes up to you and takes his position between your legs from earlier. Except now, you can see his biceps and the way they flex, now, you can feel the immense amount of warmth radiating from him. Now, his hair is even more of a mess.

“I can try,” He says quietly, balancing on on hand and lowering his lips to yours once more, trying to ignore how dangerously close his length is to bumping against your pussy. “No promises now, though.”

You laugh, wondering where he lost his self control within that short span of time where you got undressed. He cuts your laugh off mid-way though, now kissing you again and moving his hand up and down your waist. It tickles and causes goosebumps to form all over you, to the point that you can’t help but sigh into his kiss. 

He continues, still holding his hips back from grinding against you, kissing you as good as he can until trailing back to your neck again. 

It’s not until you run your fingers through his hair that he sighs himself. That relief and heavenly feeling of your fingers scraping the back of his neck— Such a simple touch can literally send him straight to hell at this point and he wouldn’t care a single bit as long as it’s from you and your hands. 

He lowers himself more, just to prevent his hips from intruding into this moment only to lock his lips onto the mound of your breast, other hand lowering so he can lay down and push your bra to the side a bit. 

The cold air that hits your nipple is short-lived when you feel him immediately suck it into his mouth with a deep breath. You continue to scratch through his hair, now using your other hand to nearly hug his head in place as you feel the sensations shoot straight between your legs. Each flick of his tongue sends signals to your brain to go! go! go! But much like him, you hold back, even though your legs still manage to squeeze his body between yours in an attempt to find the friction he isn’t yet offering. 

He continues this for a few minutes, and then works his fingers under the bra on the other side of your chest before switching his lips to that one. Perking them up so perfectly that he can graze his teeth against either nipple and feel your legs react to it. All of it is turning him on beyond belief, it’s dangerously attractive to him now too, to know that you have several toys that could have already gotten you off by now, but you choose this. You choose his lips playing with your tits, and your legs doing an amazing job of showing him your lack of control. 

His lips continue their work, up until he’s trailing further and further down, making your sighs hitch higher and higher in pitch. He kisses your ribs, just above your belly button, then just below your belly button before leaning back.

There, he looks directly at the seat of your panties and smiles at the wet spot there. He plants a kiss right there before climbing back up and caressing your cheek again. 

“You’re wet.” He comments in a huskier voice than he normally uses toward you, balancing yet again on his other arm.

Before you can actually respond, his hand on your cheek disappears and is instantly cupping your entire pussy.

You hitch out a sigh and look at him with a smile.

“Obviously.” You say back, rolling your eyes playfully before unintentionally bucking your hips into the pressure his palm offers against your clit. 

“Cute too.” He adds, lifting his palm to run his fingers up the wet spot on your panties before pressing in slightly. 

You can feel them stick to you uncomfortably, but it still feels so fucking good. Any amount of touching from him feels good though. 

“And you’re teasing me.” You argue, looking away from his playful smirk as he plays with the wet fabric against his fingers. 

“Just ask. I’m not teasing you if you're not telling me what you want.” 

You shoot your eyes back to him, a mixture of curiosity and shock in your eyes. It’s true though, you are a little shocked. Most men really just do what they want, and so do you. Never have you been asked what you want. 

Your eyes trail down as far as they can, what his hand is doing is mostly hidden between your legs but you focus entirely on the way his arms flex as his fingers travel up and down your panties. 

“You want me to ask?” You question, hips bucking up again unintentionally. 

“Not so much ask, but like, tell me what you want.”

He nods to himself as he says it, licking his bottom lip and pressing the fabric of your panties in yet again. 

It’s not that he doesn’t want to do what he wants right now though, definitely not. He just figures you know your body far better than he does, and he’d rather not make assumptions and embarrass himself when you could just ask him or better, guide him. Who is he to assume you want his fingers right now anyway?

“I’ve never…” You start, swallowing your words as your brain goes back to focusing on his fingers momentarily. “I haven’t–”

He knows what you’re trying to say, so he attempts to make it a bit easier for you. 

“Do you want me to pull your panties to the side?” 

You sigh with a nod, looking at him and allowing him to guide you through telling him what you want.

“Do you want me to touch you?” 

You nod again, pushing your head back against the mattress out of frustration that you, for some reason, can’t find the confidence to just tell him. 

He listens to your body though, more than your weak nods and frustrated sighs. The way your legs shake when he asks, the way you react to the air hitting your folds when he does push your panties to the side. He can’t bare to look down yet though, because he knows for a fact that if he were to pull back and look at you in full, he’d no longer be asking you what you want. He’d be embarrassing for sure. 

You can feel his fingers now sliding through your folds though, bare pussy out and on display but not yet being looked at, only being felt. And arguably, all you can do right now is feel too, as he leans forward to kiss you in this silent moment. 

His fingers continue to explore as he kisses you, collecting all of your arousal and swirling it around your clit before sliding back down and prodding at your entrance. You make a sound at that, kissing his a little harder than before when he lets out a hum.

“Hm?” He hums against your lips, and you nod to him. 

There, he dips a finger in only slightly. Your arms reach around his neck at the feeling and pull him closer to you. To the point that you can feel him struggle to angle his hands right to slide in deeper, but you pay no mind to it. At least not until you kiss the fucking daylights out of him.

That, you do. Kissing him with full-force and making a show of how turned on you are for him. He feels it though, with or without your kiss bruising him. The wetness on the tip of his finger only becomes wetter, and when you release your grip around his neck, he still doesn’t leave the kiss.

He goes back to gently kissing you, focusing more on your fingers than what his tongue is doing. He slides that same finger in all the way now, feeling your walls clench almost instantly and beg for more. Chuckling at the feeling, he fucks his finger into you experimentally before pulling them out and adjusting two fingers at your entrance. 

“Hm?” He hums again, and you nod again.

So, two fingers slide in and you’re releasing a soft moan against his lips. Already out of breath from focusing so hard on how he feels when he touches you. Your lips fall slack just to catch that lost breath, and he doesn’t argue, going right back to that spot on your neck to kiss as he picks up rhythm with his fingers. Effectively fucking you open with them. 

You hate to say you didn’t pay much attention to his hands until now. Having not noticed how deep just those two digits reach inside of you, and good fucking lord does he know how to use them too. Curling them up at just the right moment to have you legs shaking. 

Never have your legs fucking shook for a man. This only happens with the g-spot stimulating toys. God, you open your eyes to look at the ceiling in thought, and it has you wondering if he even knows he’s doing it. 

“Keep doing that–” you urge him, and he hums at you finally at least trying to tell him what you want. 

He finally lifts from your neck to look at you, now placing his weight back on that one free arm that had been toying with the ends of your hair this entire time, and he’s fucking floored. Even if he pictured you before with those toys, none of those images came close to this. And it’s just his fingers? No where near the size of your toys, no where near as expensive, or warm…or alive.

Oh. You want to feel someone who wants you. 

“I’ll do anything you want.” He says, doing exactly as you asked except a little faster now, still hitting that spot inside of you so perfectly that you’re moaning out now. 

He tunes in entirely to the sounds you’re making, the faces you’re making, and the way your pussy clenches around just those two fingers. He is aching at this point, pulling back from hovering over you to sit now between your legs, fingers still keeping pace, and sliding his other hand down his briefs. 

You don’t notice at first, too enthralled by the feeling of his curling fingers inside of you, but when you do–

“God,” You moan, rolling your eyes at the image of him out of breath, both hands working to pleasure both of you. “Come here.”

He listens, already pulling his hand away from himself but keeping his fingers in you, in a daze as he takes his original position of hovering over you.

“No, I mean, come here.” You say, looking at him as you reach between your bodies and pull his fingers out of you, then reach to grab between his legs. 

He immediately moans at the feeling, his hips pressing harshly into your grip with a whine as he takes a deep breath and closes his eyes just to feel it. 

“Take it out?” You continue, slowly becoming more and more comfortable telling him what you want. 

Just watching him do what you ask is insanely hot. The way he pulls his cock out seems so natural to him, you suddenly imagine what he must look like all alone while getting himself off. Thankfully though, he’s not all alone right now, he’s with you, and you intend to be getting him off. 

You look at him, between his legs, and then back at him once more before grabbing it again and practically pulling his hips to you by the cock. He groans all the same at it though, and only holds his breath when he feels your legs spread further and essentially press his cock between your folds and hold it there from the head. 

“Grind.” You say, still holding your hand in place to keep the pressure against him, which also puts pressure against your clit when he does grind up.

You both shiver at it, and he still looks down at you, fucking smiling through his sighs of relief regarding the new sensations you’re offering. 

“You’re actually fucking perfect.” He compliments, fucking his hips up and coating his cock with the dripping of your core. 

Out of everything he’s ever said to you up to this point, out of everything he’s fucking done to you, that’s the one thing that has you spiralling into a world of fucking fire. It makes you feel so warm, especially with the head of his cock bumping your clit. He has barely gotten any friction and he is still calling you perfect? Sign you the fuck up, forever, actually. 

“Don’t be stupid,” You start, waving him off between moans and gripping his shoulders.

He grinds up harder at your words though, now propping himself up on his elbows and grabbing your face on both sides. 

“You, don’t be stupid.” He says clearly, pointing his thrusts directly at your clit and moaning only slightly as he looks at you.

You swear, at that moment he could see your entire life. Everything about you. Everything you love and hate. The way he doesn’t look through you but at you? 

“You’re actually insane.” You laugh, crumbling to his pointed gaze and thrusts, your legs automatically shooting up to wrap around his waist. 

He seems proud of being called insane right now. Mostly because he can come up with at least fifty reasons as to why this is anything but insanity, but he remains quiet at the feeling of your legs squeezing around him. 

Such a girl was looking for mundane sex toys to have normal sex with? Lucky you, this is his fucking favorite. Plain ‘ol missionary? Check. Legs squeezing around him, almost pulling him in? Check. Looking directly at the face of the person he wants to make feel good? Check. 

You barely notice his lack of control by this point, the closeness alone feels like you’re already having sex but you realize you’re entirely empty still. This is fine though, until it’s not.

When does it not become fine? When his confident moans turn to soft sighs, and you notice his arms shaking a bit to hold his weight above you, and when his eyes go dead staring at you. You can tell he’s focused entirely on the feeling between the two of you, doing nothing more than aggressive yet…weak grinds? 

“Jihoon,” You say, slightly out of breath. 

“Hm?” He responds half-heartedly, releasing his weight from one elbow and dropping his head between your neck and shoulder.

“Fuck me.”

It’s like you can feel the switch in his head go from losing sanity to gaining it back in an instant at those words. He felt like he was pleasuring himself against you for so long, with so much friction between your hand and his abdomen consistently pressing into it. He could have come from this, if you wanted him to anyway. It would have been an intense orgasm after working up for so long, but now? 

He doesn’t even say anything, he doesn’t even move his head from between your neck and shoulder. Instead, you feel him expertly adjust his hips and press in without much trouble. He finds exactly where he belongs so fucking fast that is has you spinning and clenching immediately. 

“Fuck,” He drones out with a long sigh, slowly sinking his cock into you. “You’re throbbing.” 

You chuckle, because yeah. You definitely are, but so is he. You can feel his thick length spreading you open inch by inch, until he’s fully planted into and twitching. Then he doesn’t move again.

“This alone could do me in,” He chuckles against your neck, breathing in a deep sigh and attaching his teeth to your lower ear lobe. “Honestly, I can't believe I didn’t already come just from having my fingers in you.”

You’re both flattered and shocked by this comment, before you can even think to respond he’s talking again.

“You’re so tight, so wet.” He soothes himself through the feeling of your walls clenching around him, not yet wanting to move and just wanting to feel what your body does to him on its own. “It’s so hard not to move right now.

“Please,” You manage to get out, struggling to focus on just one thing with the way he’s talking and the way he sits so perfectly inside of you. “Please, move.”

And he does, instantly. Pulling out and sliding back in so easily that the slapping sound is muted entirely by the matching moan you both release. You can feel his voice vibrating against your neck, and you can imagine he might be able to feel yours through your literal pussy, because it feels like every sound, touch, and sensation is sent straight there for him to enjoy. 

It doesn’t stop either. Both of you shamelessly moaning at the feeling of him snapping his hips into you at perfect speed, with a perfect voice, and a perfect hand moving up to grip your chest. 

He’s practically blanketing you with his body, your legs holding him in this spot, his hair still finding a way to tickle your cheek with each thrust in. It’s so fucking much. It’s so good, and so…comfortable.

You’re comfortable. So comfortable you don’t even feel the need to rub your clit, you don’t want to chase the orgasm, you just want to feel him. And apparently, so does he. 

When he lifts his head, kissing the bottom of your chin and then your lower lip, still the two of you are groaning at each deep thrust in, but he manages to talk through it, somehow.

“Don’t stop,” he says, despite you barely doing anything. “Keep doing that.” He continues as his thrusts pick up pace. 

Only now do you realize that you were doing something. Without noticing, your hands were nearly tearing his back apart. Not literally, but your nails may have dug in a few times. Normally, once you notice doing that, you would stop because normally men don’t want the trace of another woman on him. Jihoon though, he’s in love with seeing remnants of you tomorrow.

Obsessed with the sting of it, loving the idea of going to his night-job tomorrow and staring at all of the toys that don’t offer you a back to hold onto like this. 

You do as he asks much like he does for you, gripping him so tightly that your nails have no choice but to leave half-moon shapes on his skin. Each thrust drags your fingers up, down, up down, and with each thrust it somehow feels deeper, harder, hotter.

When he releases your chest from his other hand and puts it back to your cheek, caressing much like he has each time he’s focused on kissing you, you think you’re a fucking goner. 

As expected, he kisses you at that moment and thrusts once, hard, before holding himself there.

“I’m really close,” He whispers apologetically between kisses, “tell me how to get you there with me.”

You smile when he kisses you again instead of letting you answer, but you fall into it much like he does and you opt to grab that hand on your cheek and guide it to your clit. 

Instantly, he’s rubbing harsh and sloppy circles around it, and you reward him for the perfect work of his fingers yet again with your fingernails digging into his back. He softly moans at that, and you swallow it up all too easily. 

Tensing your muscles, his fingers on your clit work you up so quickly that you go barely warn him of your oncoming orgasm, even as his cock sits leaking and heavy inside of you. You don’t even know how to tell him, all you can do is frantically moan out shortly.

“I’m–” 

Instantly his hips are back at work, barely even thrusting but instead remaining buried into you for the most part. He pulls out an inch and slams back in, wanting your orgasm to get him off more than his own movements. And fuck, it does.

The way you clench when you reach your high, slack lips against his own, he releases at what he could argue is the best possible time. Your tenses muscles work him up perfectly, gently massaging his cock as he releases in full without too much overstimulation. 

And you. You have never gotten off with a man staying mostly still inside of you. Actually, you’ve only gotten off that way with toys because nothing beats getting off while completely filly. Jihoon really is something, or, someone. 

The two of you released together, and his lips fell slack just like yours did. The kissing turned to that of desperate, orgasm-fogged moans into the other’s mouth. For some reason, it was incredibly hot to you that you both reacted that way. So insanely drunk on the other that nothing felt embarrassing.

Even the way his fingers moved on your clit through your orgasm, he somehow knew when to go and when to stop. 

Even now, as your orgasm tapers off, you are so blissfully aware that you want to immediately fall asleep even with him inside of you. Jihoon is polite though, and gently pulls out with a small apology of the mess. 

When he looks at you, looking so sleepy under him, maybe it translates to him too and he instantly yawns but tries to be strong for both of you.

“We should clean up.”

~

There wasn’t even a question in your head when he slept over that night. He didn’t even hint at leaving. Nor did he hint the morning after as you groggily opened your computer for your daily work. 

He did hint that he would miss you when he eventually had to go to his own house and get ready for a day at the sex-shop. 

He also hinted a few times at feeling like, when he looked at you, you weren’t a brand new person in his life. Part of you wonders if that’s because maybe you want to be permanent in his life from now on.

Later that night, he came back. Bright eyes and a stinging back.

For some reason, you feel it’s safe to say that neither of you can stand being apart for too long. So yeah, maybe this is what a normal relationship is like. If, you know, you were in a relationship with him.

Ironically enough, only a few days later that relationship is established in the form of a new car battery and a bottle of lube that he bought for you. 

Not that you need it. (The lube.)

#woozi smut #svt smut #seventeen smut #jihoon smut #lee jihoon smut #lee woozi smut

[flappingdragon]

DiaLuci HC’s

A/N: I don’t think I’ve actually posted any DiaLuci on here that wasn’t a reblog lol. Guess I’m here to deliver to y’all XD feel free to take any of these HC’s and adopt them into your own canon DiaLuci universe

(P.S. I didn’t proofread anything, so if there’s any mistakes, which there probably is, sorry in advance!)

Tags: DiaLuci, fluff, SFW and NSFW content, no MC/reader, wing kink, dacryphilia, I’m not gonna tag everything I wrote into the tags cuz I’m lazy, but just be careful when reading cuz I have nsfw stuff (it will be marked under the NSFW category, dw)

(Read Under the Cut)

✅SFW✅

Sometimes, when both Lucifer and Diavolo are working late to finish up some last minute documents and files, Lucifer won’t realize that he’ll lightly growl at random times

Lucifer doesn’t notice but Diavolo does and he thinks it’s adorable

Diavolo would put down his pen and rest his chin on his hand and just look at Lucifer with awe

Diavolo is fascinated with any sound Lucifer makes so even hearing him growl makes him so happy

When Diavolo finally told Lucifer that he growls, Lucifer simply denied it and moved on to a different conversational topic

Mostly, it’s Diavolo that tends to initiate things in his and Lucifer’s relationship due to the fact Lucifer isn’t used to physical or verbal affection

But that doesn’t mean Lucifer doesn’t initiate anything towards Diavolo

If Lucifer wants to initiate anything, even if it’s a kiss, he would ask first

Diavolo would always tell him he doesn’t have to ask but Lucifer will continue to do it anyway

But Lucifer does get a bit embarrassed when he asks for a kiss

Diavolo loves it

When the both of them go out to drink and Lucifer has had too many drinks, Lucifer will shower Diavolo with praise, affection, and touches

When Lucifer gets drunk, everything he wants to say will come pouring out without a filter

Diavolo gets so flustered and Lucifer will tease him about it not realizing he himself is also red in the face

Diavolo is mostly found laying in Lucifer’s lap in their private moments away from work and Lucifer’s brothers

Diavolo just loves the way Lucifer runs his fingers in his hair

It makes him feel so happy and loved

Yes, it’s cliche but he loves Lucifer so much

I mean, how could his stomach not do triple summersaults when his dear fallen angel shows him some physical affection?

If he was a puppy, his tail would absolutely be causing a strong wind

⚠️NSFW⚠️

When I’m the bedroom, it doesn’t matter who’s top and who’s bottom

It just depends on how the both of them are feeling at that peculiar moment

One night, Diavolo could bottom and wake up with his body littered with love bites, hickeys, and handprints made from Lucifer’s hands

Then the next night Lucifer could bottom and wake up with a sore back, numb horns, and his feathers ruffled beyond recognition

So yes

These two are definitely switches

Diavolo, depending on his mood, either likes sex to be romantic and soft or he likes it rough and quick for a nice stress relief

Lucifer, no matter what his mood is, LOVES to be rough whether he’s topping or bottoming and there’s no in between (unless Diavolo asks him to be gentle and careful then only will Lucifer comply)

Diavolo, most of the time, likes to be soft when topping then he likes to make Lucifer forget his own name as time progresses

But when Lucifer tops, he likes to overstimulate Diavolo to the point that he’s a moaning, begging, and crying mess

Which definitely indicates that Lucifer has a dacryphilia kink

Lucifer loves the idea that only he can make Diavolo cry with the sheer amount of pleasure he gives (and it’s one of those cliche things where it’s only HIM that can make him feel this way)

Diavolo definitely has a wing kink

He just loves Lucifer’s wings and likes to touch them

Which then usually causes Lucifer to reach his climax early bc his wings are so sensitive to touch (especially in certain areas like the base of each appendage)

Diavolo also like his own wings played with

Whether if it’s dragging a finger over every intricate detail or just full on fist-grabbing, he enjoys it

Especially when it’s Lucifer doing it

Gods. He just wants Lucifer to ruin him

And it shows XD

Aftercare with them is easy

Just a simple snap of either Lucifer’s or Diavolo’s fingers and everything is cleaned and spotless

Barbatos is thankful to that bc he does NOT want to clean up after the prince’s and his partner’s mess

Poor guy has enough on his plate

He doesn’t want to be in any way, shape, or form involved in any of the prince’s sexual practices/activities

#givebarbatosabreak

#obey me #obey me nb #obey me shall we date #obey me nightbringer #obey me lucifer #obey me one master to rule them all #obey me fandom #diavolo obey me #obey me swd #obey me dialuci #obey me diavolo #lucifer obey me #lucifer x diavolo #diavolo x lucifer #bottom diavolo #bottom lucifer #sub lucifer #sub diavolo #top lucifer #top diavolo #dom diavolo #dom lucifer #switch dialuci #obey me nsft #obey me smut #no reader insert #nsft #dialuci #they’re gay your honor

[lucidlivi]

Chosen For Pleasure (VIII)

Series Masterlist/Warnings

Tag List: @ladysparkles78 @suckitands33 @little-x-wolf @stoneyggirl2 @creative-writing92 @jc-winchester @mrsjenniferwinchester @lessons-of-red @jamerlynn @deans-baby-momma @willow-sages @ritz-hell-hotel @perpetualabsurdity @mhessellund @itzabbyxx @chriszgirl92 @abbybarnesstuff @larrem88 @commonsenseishard @impalaspixie @notsogoofyjelly @hzllxhoundxx @taylortots-world (there’s so many of you now 🥹 thank you so much ya’ll don’t realize how much you hype me up! If you want to be added please send me a message or an ask so I can keep track of everyone!)

switching point of view, I will indicate the switch with italics

just a little fyi the secret of who leaked the information won’t be revealed yet so don’t come for me lol but to make up for it, Jensen’s story will be revealed…

Also I don’t know if I have to explain it but I will anyways my little ******* line indicates a time jump, I’m just too lazy to write up to that time…oops!

Anyhoo I’ll be quiet now, here’s the content you came for…

Jensen

I brought the bottle to my lips, chugging.

I was working on my seventh bottle of whiskey this week.

I don’t know why I care this much.

She isn’t the first girl I’ve ended things with.

Why did it feel so crappy this time?

“If I walk out this door I’m not coming back.”

Her words replayed in my head, cutting in to me like knives.

And she didn’t.

Not that I expected her too.

I messed up.

Again.

I brought the bottle back to my lips, collapsing on the couch. I heard the door open, but I didn’t care enough to check who it was. It’s probably Cole checking on me for the hundredth time this week.

“I want to be left alone Cole.” I growled taking a swig of whiskey.

“well too damn bad.”

I sat up meeting eyes with my towering best friend.

“how’d you know?”

“Genevieve, uh they talk, and then I saw the stuff online.” Jared said rubbing his neck.

“why didn’t you tell me?” He added, hurt crossing his features.

“I didn’t think I would feel this bad about it. Why do I feel this bad?” I asked setting down the whiskey bottle.

“it’s called heartbreak J, there’s about a million songs written about it… perhaps you cared a little more than you thought you did.” Jared said sitting down next to me, picking up the bottle of whiskey and taking a sip.

I huffed grabbing the bottle from him.

Jared grabbed the bottle back immediately before I could take a sip.

“Jensen we’ve been friends for years so I feel like I can tell you this. You need to stop living in the past, okay? Not every girl is going to be Elle. You’ve got to stop self-sabotaging. I’m sorry that the women in your life have consistently let you down, and that fucking sucks, but dude you have to move on from it. I can’t stand to see you lose a good thing in your life. Dude that girl was perfect for you. She was crazy about you, you could see it in her eyes. I don’t know if she leaked anything, but if she did I know sure as shit it wasn’t to intentionally hurt you. God damn Jensen the only one hurting you, is you, and I’m sorry but if you keep this up you’re going to end up miserable and all alone. ” Jared said taking the whiskey and dumping it in the sink.

Elle.

Hearing her name made me tense.

That’s why I don’t say it. Don’t talk about it.

miserable and all alone.

Exactly how I was feeling now.

God he was right. I was just miserable and all alone.

I sighed.

She’s not Elle, she was the furthest thing from Elle.

And I ruined it all.

“It doesn’t even matter now, I fucked up Jar, and I don’t think you can talk my way out of it this time.” I said putting my head in my hands.

“No I can’t. But maybe you can.” He said moving my hands away from my head.

“I doubt she’d even listen to anything I’d have to say. I wouldn’t even know where to start.”

“how about two words you’ve never said to anyone… I’m sorry.”

“and then tell her how you feel, how you actually feel.” He added.

“I feel like I’m falling in love with her, and it scares me.” I said feeling the tears brim my eyes.

“Jensen love is scary, god I was so scared to talk to Gen at first, don’t you remember? But I knew that she was my future, everything I had ever wanted, so I swallowed my fear and I went for it.”

“and what if she doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore?”

“then at least you can say you tried.”

It was silent for a moment as I mulled over his words in my head.

“ also I just might happen to know where she’s going to be tonight.” Jared smirked.

I stood up smiling at Jared.

I’m going to get my girl back.

Reader

I don’t know what happened.

Ok I do.

I just don’t know how.

Stella was there to catch me as I collapsed.

She held me as I sobbed. Once I caught my breath, the words poured from my lips.

“I’ll kill him.” Stella said standing up.

I grabbed her hand pulling her back down to the couch. I needed her right now.

His words replayed in my head in a continuous loop.

this was never a relationship

It felt like one to me. I see now just how one sided that was.

I would never leak his information. I signed a non-disclosure. I wouldn’t be that stupid to go against it. Stella is the only other person who knew.

“you never talked to anyone about me and Jensen did you?” I asked hesitantly.

“you know I would never do that.”

I knew she was telling the truth. She would never do that to me.

“look we’ll find out who did this, but in the meantime…” she said escaping from the living room quickly.

She came back seconds later pulling out a carton of ice cream and two spoons.

“I’m not going to eat my feelings Stella.” I smiled just a little bit.

“Even if they’re chocolate chip cookie dough flavored?”

I sighed taking a spoon. Her smile grew as she opened the carton. We sat eating the entire carton, as I cried silently.

If I thought that was bad, work the next day was hell.

As soon as Stella and I walked in all eyes were on us… well me.

I could hear the murmurs of gossip about my love life. I could feel my breath becoming shallow and quick. Everyone was staring at me.

I turned around to run out but crashed right into Gray.

“hey what’s the matter?” He asked grabbing my hand to pull me up.

I couldn’t control my erratic breathing. I was feeling a panic attack coming on.

He pulled me in to his office offering me a glass of water. I silently thanked him sipping it while trying to regain a normal breathing rhythm.

“I’m assuming this is about the paper.” Gray asked tossing thee paper on his desk.

Oh great of course he’s seen it too.

Unease filled me staring at the picture of Jensen and I on the front.

“Gray.. I” I started to defend myself but he cut me off.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to explain it to me, so you’re having a fling with him, who cares what other people think right?”

“I’m uh not, not anymore.” I said biting my lip to stop the tears.

“Follow me.” Gray said grabbing my hand and pulling me back out of his office.

He stood in the middle of the office, I went over and cowered behind Stella.

“Excuse me, it has come to my attention that there has been some unprofessional conduct in this office, if I hear anyone talking about certain situations, you will be reprimanded. Thank you.” Gray said offering me a small smile.

I think that just made it worse.

I rested my head on my desk debating on banging it off it a few thousand times.

Fuck my life.

“don’t worry, it’ll die down in a day or two, look I’m sure Taylor Swift will do something new and exciting and people won’t even think about you.” Stella said.

I raised my head sending her a glare.

“right not helping.” She said.

Stella was right.

By day two it had died down.

By day three it was a few murmurs.

Day four it completely disappeared. 

Now a week later I was back to being a nobody.

Except to Gray.

It was strange. He brought me coffee every morning, checking in on my well being. Today was no different.

“how are you this morning?” Gray asked handing me a mug of coffee.

“better thank you.” I said smiling.

It was true.

Each day that passed it was getting better.

I realized I didn’t deserve any of that.

Jensen had some deeply rooted issues and that wasn’t my fault, yet I was the one paying for them. It wasn’t fair.

Stella and I weren’t any closer to finding out who leaked the information either, so that was incredibly frustrating.

“I have a surprise for you, follow me.” Gray said laughing.

I glanced at Stella before following Gray in to his office.

“close your eyes.”

I sighed hesitantly shutting my eyes. I felt something being placed in my hands.

“okay open them.”

I opened them seeing a ticket in my hand.

“uh it’s for an auction, I uh offered up two of your landscape photos, you’re incredibly talented and I think other people should see it too, who knows they might go for a lot of money.” Gray said smiling.

Wow.

This is what I had always wanted. My pictures to be seen by more people. I smiled and before I realized what I was doing I wrapped my arms around Gray giving him a hug. He was caught off guard at first but immediately hugged back.

“Uh thanks Gray, you have no idea how much I appreciate this.” I said pulling back.

“No problem, I’ll uh see you there.” He smiled.

Wait what was this?

Did I just accidentally agree to a date with my boss?

He must’ve of noticed my confusion.

“I’m uh one of the organizers.” He added with a laugh.

“Oh right of course.” I said embarrassed.

“Not that I wouldn’t like a date with you.” He said moving a little closer.

I felt the air getting caught in my throat. He was my boss. It felt wrong.

“I should um get back to work, thanks for this again, I’ll uh see you tonight.” I said rushing out of his office.

It was weird wasn’t it?

Why was he being this nice to me? I know it certainly wasn’t because Jensen dumped me. I was hesitant to go tonight.

What’s the worst that could happen though?

****************************************************

I stood off to the side sipping on a glass of red wine. A little black dress hugged my body as I looked around at the people in expensive suits and even more expensive gowns.

I was totally out of place.

I took a seat as the auction began. There were a lot of art pieces and photographs being auctioned off.

I looked at the pictures Gray chose. It was true they were some of my best, but I definitely didn’t think they should be up there, compared to the other pieces. Especially since the last piece just sold for 25,000 dollars. I was zoning out when Gray’s voice snapped me out of my trance.

“Our next two pieces come as a set. These beautiful photographs were taking by the beautiful (F/N) (L/N). I’ll start the bidding at 1,000.”

“1,000.” a man said holding up his paddle.

Holy shit. Someone wants to pay one thousand dollars for my photographs!

“5,000.” A feminine voice called.

Someone pinch me!

“10,000.”

Oh my god. I’m hyperventilating.

“15,000.”

If anyone bids any higher they’re going to have to pick me up from this floor.

“40,000.”

My entire world came to a pause at that moment.

I know that voice.

“40,000 going once, 40,000 going twice. Sold to Mr. Ackles for 40,000.” Gray grumbled.

I stood up quickly fleeing for the exit. I kept my head down, not wanting to see him. Of course as fate would have it, he caught up to me.

“(y/n) please stop.” Jensen said grabbing my hand.

I quickly rip my hand out of his grasp.

I finally look up meeting his eyes.

Woah.

He looks like he hasn’t slept in days, big dark circles lay under his eyes making them look lifeless. I felt kind of bad.

Hold up.

Why should I feel bad?

He didn’t feel bad as he screamed at me and kicked me out of his house.

“What are you doing here Jensen? Are you here to scream at me some more? Want to accuse me of anything else?”

I felt the venom dripping off of each word. He looked as if I slapped him in the face.

“I just uh, I want to talk.” He said fumbling over his words.

“Oh now you wanna have a conversation? Jensen you really hurt me.. you don’t get to do things just when it’s convenient for you.”

“I know I hurt you and I’m…. I’m sorry.”

Woah.

In the time that we were together, even when we fought before, I’m sorry has never left Jensen’s lips.

“You’re sorry?”

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for yelling at you. I’m sorry for scaring you. I’m sorry for accusing you. I’m sorry for all of it. God I know I’m probably the worst person in the world and the last thing you want to do is talk to me but all I’m asking for all I’m begging for is one conversation. Please just come to dinner with me and let’s talk.” He pleaded.

Woah.

I sighed looking at him.

He looked like hell.

“Fine… I’ll go to dinner with you. But only because I’m hungry.” I huffed crossing my arms.

He smiled, putting his hand on the small of my back to lead me out. I quickly pulled away from him.

“oh no Ackles, you don’t have that privilege.” I said.

He holds his hands up in surrender, giving me a flirty smile. He opened the door for us to step out.

“(y/n) wait!”

I turned around to see Gray running towards us. As he got close, I didn’t miss the glare he sent Jensen. He stood in between me and Jensen blocking him from me.

“are you okay?” He asked grabbing my hand.

“yeah you know what I think I got it from here.” Jensen growled placing a hand on Grays shoulder to move him.

Gray shoved his hand off turning around to stare him down. They were the same height and their builds matched up pretty well too. This could be bad.

“I wasn’t asking you.” Gray spit.

“(y/n) come on let’s go.” Jensen said grabbing my arm and pulling me to him.

“don’t tell her what to do.” Gray shot back grabbing my other arm.

“STOP BOTH OF YOU! I’m not some possession to be won.” I yelled ripping my arms away from both men.

“I’m sorry.” Jensen quickly spoke up.

“I’m fine Gray, let’s just go.” I said nodding at Jensen.

Jensen glared at Gray one more time before leading me out. I once again pulled my hand away from him. I was furious!

“I can’t believe you talked to him that way… he’s my boss, you’re going to get me fired.” I growled stopping in the middle of the parking lot.

“yeah well he wants whats mine.”

“ha, whats yours? last time I checked you were the one that said this was never a relationship.” I sneered pointing between us.

“well I was wrong, I want to try again… for real this time… because I’m uh I’m falling in love you, and I never cared about any of this stuff until I met you. Fuck I just want to be with you.” Jensen said.

It was as if the walls he built were crumbling down.

“I want to believe you.. I do but, Jensen I can’t keep waiting around for you to let me in. It’s not fair how you get to shut down and push me away. You said some really hurtful things and now you want to pretend like it didn’t happen.”

He was silent as he stared at me.

Of course, shutting down like always.

I sighed and turned to walk away when his voice caught me off guard.

“there were two names.”

I quickly pivoted back around giving him a confused look.

“you asked me what was her name, the one that did this to me… there were two. Elle and my mother.” He spilled.

“come on Jensen not here.” I said pulling him to the car.

I pulled open the door to the back seat, sliding in with Jensen following me. I sat quietly hoping he would continue.

“Uh ok when I was young my dad decided he didn’t want to be a dad anymore and he left. I thought that it was all my fault. It really hurt my mother. Instead of coping with it, she turned to drugs, heroin for one. I didn’t know about it at first but then she started missing baseball games and picking me up from school. Dinner started to come from a box every night and it got to the point where I had to make my own. I fell down at baseball and broke my arm. I cried for my mom but she was too busy getting high that she didn’t notice. My baseball coach took me to the ER and when they couldn’t get in touch with my mom they sent police to my house. They found her with a needle in her arm. I was immediately taken from her custody, and placed with my aunt. I thought that once Mom got clean, she’d come for me… but she never did. Turns out she blamed me too. When I needed her the most, she wasn’t there. I desperately just wanted her attention and never got it. I guess that’s why I looked for that attention elsewhere. That’s when I met Elle. She made me feel like I mattered, like I meant something. I fell in love with her quickly, shared all of my firsts with her. I was so in love with her, I even proposed. I thought I was going to share my life with this girl. Now supernatural was just getting popular at this time. All of a sudden horrible things started coming out about me. I didn’t know where the tabloids were getting this information but none of it was true. It got so bad that they thought about recasting me in the show. One day I noticed Elle left her phone on the stand. I went through it and saw that she had been selling stories about me to the tabloids for money. She was also seeing someone else behind my back. She never loved me. She just pretended. I was heart broken. I felt like I lost everything. I swore from that day forward I’d never give a woman that power over me again, and that’s why I don’t kiss anyone cause then that means it’s real. And I’ve stuck to my word….up until now.”

I let Jensen’s words sink in.

No wonder he was the way he was. He’d been hurt badly by two women who were supposed to love and take care of him.

I didn’t noticed how long I sat there in silence until he spoke up.

“say something to me please.” He pleaded.

I looked in his eyes and saw they were misty with tears.

I didn’t say anything.

Instead I pulled his head to my chest, wrapping my arms around him in a hug. He quickly wrapped his arms around me as silent sobs escaped his lips.

We sat there in silence for a moment while we both collected ourselves.

“thank you for telling me that.. I’m sorry that people made you feel like that. I’m sorry that the person who was supposed to love you and support you didn’t, but Jensen not everyone is going to be that way. I know getting close to people is scary. I’m scared too.” I admitted.

Jensen picked his head up looking me in the eyes.

“I’m falling in love with you (F/N) (L/N).” Jensen whispered, leaning his forehead against mine.

“I’m falling in love with you too, Jensen Ackles.” I whispered back.

“can we please try again? I promise to be more open, I promise to work on my intimacy issues. I promise I will never hurt you that way again.” He pleaded.

“okay but one condition.”

“what’s that?”

“we take it slow.”

Author Note:

Awwe poor boy! who do you think leaked the information if not Stella? What’s going on with Gray? Hmm guess you’ll just have to come back for more!

Part (IX)

#jensen ackles #jensen ackles imagine #jensen ackles x female!reader #dean winchester #dean winchester imagine #dean winchester x reader #jensen ackles x reader #jensen ackles x you #jensen ackles preference #jensen x reader #jensen ackles fanfiction #jensen and jared #jensen ackles smut #jensen ackles fic #supernatural #spn #jared and jensen #jared padalecki #dean winchester x you #jensen x you #spn cast #supernatural smut

[storiesofleftoverghosts]

dating the batboys... and their Taylor Swift songs | (1.5/2)

pairings: Jason Todd x GN!Reader

warnings: angst, mention of death, arguing

requested?: kind of! @igotanidea asked to be tagged for a part for Jason so here you go!

a/n: THANK YALL SO MUCH FOR THE LOVE ON THE FIRST PART!! it truly means a lot to me! I’m also sorry it took SO long, I’ve been testing. I decided to split this into parts just so I could get something out for y’all. It also is a bit longer than others so I hope y’all like it!

its so hard only choosing two songs but if I didn’t this post would be going on foreverrrrr.

Jason Todd

i'd like to establish this by saying Jason Todd is NOT the angry Robin

but like with all of the boys, he is traumatized

like extremely traumatized

if he was to get with you, he'd have to know you for a long time

even then it's iffy

he has a lot of trust issues

and abandonment issues

issues in general

if he knew you before his death, I feel like you’d have a higher chance of him trusting you

(the angst potential here…)

but don't get me wrong

he’s the type who once he loves someone, he loves them with every ounce of fiber he has in his body

I’d like to think of him as a secret hopeless romantic

just has a hard time showing it

he would be the type of boyfriend to tease you about you wanting something badly and then go behind your back and buy it for you

this man would die (again) for you

you ask him to jump and he’ll say how high

in the beginning he would be anxious about doing mundane things with you (not that he would ever admit)

but once he gets used to it, it’s his favorite thing

do not fold laundry with this man because he’ll definitely make into a war and start throwing clothes at you

favorite pass time would be to cook with you

YES I HEADCANON HES A GOOD COOK SHUT UP

being lazy on the couch together, reading books and enjoying each others presence

as much as Jason loves touch, I feel like he would love spending quality time with you more

especially given his busy life style with being Red Hood

would keep you away from that life

he’s like Bruce in that aspect and will not risk getting you involved

especially because being Red Hood is more dangerous and he has a LOOOT of enemies

encouraging him to open up about his emotions

he’s better than Bruce about talking about his feelings, but he still has issues with it

comforting him through nightmares

also comforting him through panic attacks and whatnot

understanding his complicated relationship with his family and trying not push him about it

still developing some what of a relationship with his brothers

if you knew him before his death, definitely having that fear of losing him again

you never recovered from the loss of him and even to this day, it haunts you

having arguments about it because Jason insists he’s careful and you won’t lose him

having arguments in general because he struggles with trusting people and is paranoid

those arguments do not last long because as much as he is stubborn

he doesn’t want to lose you

longest it will last is a couple of days

staying up late waiting for him to get home

LATE NIGHT CUDDLES

I would also like to argue that Jason lives for playful wrestling

he loves making you smile as it’s his favorite feature on you

late night motorcycle rides

he is such a mother hen when it comes to you

“did you eat today? have you had any water? what time did you go to bed?” “okay mom,”

teaching you how to use specific weapons and self defense because duh, it’s Gotham (part two)

at the end of the day, Jason Todd is a traumatized man trying to love you the best he can.

Me being me, I’m going to have to say Afterglow (from Lover) would be my number one choice for Jason. It actually inspired me to even start this! I think Treacherous (from Red (Taylor’s Version)) would be so Jason too.

Bonus: Sparks Fly (from Speak Now (Taylor’s Version)) is also a very Jason Todd song. No I will not elaborate.

“Tell me that you're still mine

Tell me that we'll be just fine

Even when I lose my mind

I need to say

Tell me that it's not my fault

Tell me that I'm all you want

Even when I break your heart”

It didn’t take a genius to realize Jason Todd had messed up. He knew it as soon as the words that had tasted like poison left his mouth. All of the melting hot rage he had felt reached it’s boiling point, and it finally blew up.

“What do you know, you don’t even have a family!”

It seemed to echo throughout your shared apartment. The deafening silence that slowly poured in after made him feel incredibly nauseous. Your face slowly contorted from one of shock to one of a statue. Stoic and cold. The only sound to be heard was the incessant rain pounding against the windows.

You had slowly made your way over to the couch. For fifteen minutes you sat on the soft leather couch. Fifteen fucking agonizing minutes of nothing but Jason trying to somehow make it right. He apologized many times. He tried comforting you. But you just sat there, eyes closed and ignoring everything he had done. His side of the couch seemed to grow heavier and heavier with every attempt.

It made him feel like a child again. When his mother would get upset with him, she would give him the silent treatment. It would go on for days on end, and he would beg and apologize for forgiveness.

He never told you that though.

What you guys were arguing about seemed so small now. Jason was always one to blow things out of proportion. At one point in time, it had been about you going out with Dick and Tim for the third day in a row. He was a bit envious of your relationship with the aforementioned. He just didn’t know if it was Dick and Tim he was jealous of or you.

Instead of trying to talk to you about staying home and spending time with him or hell, even inviting him out with you, he took out his irritation you. It had been a long day, and this had been the cherry on top. He made a snarky comment to try and start a fight. Unfortunately, you were one to try to talk it out. It only added fuel to the fire. It escalated to the current situation. He hadn’t meant for it to end up like this.

Why’d he have to break what he loved so much?

Finally, you made a noise. You took a deep breath in and bore into his eyes. Tears were threatening to spill from them any second. It felt he had been burned, and he had no one to blame but himself.

“Before you say anything, I am incredibly sorry. It was all just me in my head. I should have never said those things, and I don’t want to lose you over this. Please, please, please let me make it up to you.” He has never sounded so desperate before. But then again, he’s never cut you this deep. Your eyes had travelled down away from him. The lump in your throat was hard to swallow.

“Jason. You’re not going to lose me over this. You’re still all I want,” The tears had started to roll down your cheeks by now. Seeing you cry made his heart crush, and he couldn’t stop himself from scooting closer to you.

“But what you said had really hurt my feelings. And if you ever say something like that to me again, I’m going to leave and take some time for myself.” You warned through the tears. Seeing your lip quiver as you spoke was enough for him to engulf you in his arms.

“I promise if I ever say that again, you could smack me as hard as you can. I deserve it.” You let out a tearful laugh and shook your head. However, he was being dead serious. You buried yourself in his embrace.

“I forgive you this time. Just next time communicate with me. We’re partners. It’s me and you against the problem.” Hearing how sincere you were made his heart swell. It made him feel even more guilty for starting the argument with you. But if you could forgive him, then maybe he can forgive himself too.

“You’re right. I’m sorry for everything. I just…” He paused. It was difficult for him to talk about his feelings, but he trusted you. You were his whole world after all. “I just wanted to spend time with you alone. I had a hard today today, and you always manage to make me feel better.” He murmured. His cheeks were a soft pink color. No matter how long you guys had been together for, it was awkward for him to tell you about how he felt.

You pulled away from the embrace to look him in the eyes. A small smile was on your face and your cheeks were tear stained. Your eyes had never had more of a soft look in them as one of your hands cupped the side of his face. Your thumb had slowly grazing his cheek.

“Why didn’t you say so? I don’t mind canceling my plans for you.” The smile on your lips grew, and you leaned in to give him a kiss on the cheek. The rain had seemed to turn into a soft sprinkle. You got up from the couch and made your way to the kitchen. His eyes followed you, clearly confused on what you were doing.

“Come on, let’s just cook and watch something.” You called. A bright smile spread across his face as he followed your voice. It was simple idea but it meant the world that you had decided to forgive him. He wouldn’t say that arguing with you will never happen again, but he knew that no matter how frustrating the situation was, he’d never utter an insult to you again.

He loved you too much, after all.

#jason todd x reader #jason todd #batman x reader #taylor swift inspired #afterglow #red hood x reader #fanfiction #x reader #elliessodashop #taylor swift

[rocketboots564]

Here is part one of my thoughts, notes, and reactions to Red Versus Blue Season 9 as a first time watcher!

Yes, I have heard the news about Rooster Teeth. No I will not let that stop me from binging this series one way or another!

The rest of each individual season will be posted separately instead of being a reblog of the first post… mainly because I saw how egregiously long my post on season 8 was.

Season 9 Part 1:

Epsilon… what do you mean nobody’s called you “Director” in a really long time? Sir, season 8 was probably just a couple months ago… I think…

I don’t know how much time has passed from S8 to S9

FIRST OF ALL TUCKER, CHURCH IS CABOOSE’S BEST FRIEND

Wait… how can you get winded if you’re an AI. I mean I know Epsilon is in a memory unit, but does that mean he relives everything in a human body too?

It does make sense that Epsilon doesn’t really know how to use a Rifle. Sure, Church (or Alpha? Imma stick with church) didn’t know how to properly use it either, but he did know how to adjust the scope.

“Torqued in my pants” pffft…

WOAH TUCKER?! You did WHAT IN ALONE TIME? WHAT THE HELL’S “ALONE TIME”? 😦

Erm… what the Metal Gear? I unironically love this stealth mission thing. And knowing South Dakota… I wonder how long it’ll take for this to go tits up…

I’m betting five to ten minutes

also, YESS THE BIG BUCKS BUDGET OF ANIMATED CG SCENES RETURNS.

South MY GOD LISTEN UP?! HAVE YOU NEVER PLAYED ANY STEALTH GAME?! Set up the MOTION DECTETORS!!!

As someone who’s had years of experience sneaking past light sleepers in the dead of night for snacks and video games… I could do this better than you South Dakota.

SOUTH THIS IS WHY WE SET OUR SOLITON RADAR!!! I mean motion detectors… sorry I got Metal Gear Solid on the brain

MY GOD THE ANIMATION?! THE TAG TEAMING?! What happened that got South Dakota to eventually abandon North Dakota?

I too could take 50 of them South… in a fight… definitely a fight

Oop I saw that in the background! Who’s that?!

OOH THEY BAITED ME WITH THE BLACK ARMOR! They almost made me think it Tex… it’s actually well… whoever this cyan lady is

Supportive Sarge? He WANTS to hear the blue perspective? He DOESN’T want to command and yell at his subordinates?

GRIF? CLEANING? Actually I could get behind Maid Grif.

“I actually like being talked down to” woah WOAH SIMMONS?! 🤨 real, me too…

I mean… at least Donut’s still kept his accidental yet somewhat intentional innuendos. And, also his diary apparently…

Damn SHUT UP SOUTH DAKOTA! SHUT UP!! NOBODY HEAR WANTS TO HEAR YOUR SHIT!

North? WHOAH ANIMATED FACES?! NORTH DAKOTA WITH THE CLUTCH!!

Medics = bad luck. Honestly… yeah for you guys they are.

THE PHOTOSHOPPED WET FLOOR SIGN AND MOP IS KILLING ME

The ultimate OTP battle: Caboose x Sheila versus Caboose x Email

Listen… Tucker… never in a million years will I ever call you Professor Fuck

Damn the Freelancer Program only has ranked mode? No wonder they’re all assholes

CONNECTICUT? SHE’S CT? Yeah I can see why you’re so mad about your low rank… you’ll get your shit rocked by Professor Fuck of all people. Fuck it… it’s a funny name

So like… you know you’ve got absolutely dogshit rizz when Caboose has a better shot at dating someone than you.

Speaking of which… Caboose is now in my top 5 of the most dateable guys in this show. Like take this quote from him:

“I just really want to meet someone nice. Someone who appreciates me for who I am not so much because I’m pretty but because they really want to get to know me…”

HOW HAS THIS MAN NOT WOOED THE HEARTS OF THOUSANDS?

Tucker has NO rizz…

Oh wow Epsilon, just drop the existential dread on your teammates like that with no warning. It is a damn good thing your teammates either don’t understand it or don’t care.

Huh… seems even in a memory unit in which everyone is different fate still finds a way to make Grif lazy and sarcastic again.

Then again, that’s kinda happening with the rest of Red Team as well, minus Simmons and Lopez

Also, LOPEZ IS BACK! And this time is immediately beefing with Simmons… or rather the other way around.

“I’ll show you who’s likable and funny, and who people like” SIMMONS BABY ITS YOU! YOUR THE ONE I LOVE! YOUR THE ONE I NEED!

I just like Simmons… a perfectly normal amount…

Conclusion: this season already fucking ROCKS I LOVE IT! HOLY SHIT THIS IS AWESOME!

#red versus blue #red vs blue #rvb #rvb caboose #rvb church #rvb sarge #rvb simmons #rvb tucker #rvb epsilon #rvb freelancers #rvb season 9 #rooster teeth #Carolina can step on me–WHO SAID THAT?!

[bidisasterevankinard]

Wip Wednesday

I'm too late cause well I don't have anything new(I'm sad and too busy 😭)

Tagged @hippolotamus @jesuisici33 @buddierights @watchyourbuck @wildlife4life @wikiangela @eddiebabygirldiaz @spotsandsocks @daffi-990 @devirnis @heartshapedvows @the-likesofus @hoodie-buck @loserdiaz @ladydorian05 thank you all 💙💙💙

I'm sad and was in angst mood but couldn't write, but anon made me think about this old wip so gimme opinion

After 6s au where Eddie said no when Buck asked him out

The next day Eddie calls him. Buck is really considering the possibility of not picking up the phone, but it wouldn't be very polite, and he still wants to keep the friendship, so putting himself together, he answers and curses his voice for the fact that Eddie can hear that he was crying. A lot. All night.

“Hey,” the only thing Buck actually manages to say before feeling how the familiar feeling of approaching tears envelops his chest, but he does not feel the wetness on his cheeks, because he cried out all the tears at night.

“Hey, I,” Eddie pauses and Buck is ready to hear how his best friend ends their friendship in this phone call. “I wanted to make sure you’re ok. I’m sorry, Buck.”

“Not your fault, Eds.”

“Yes. I know, Still, I didn’t want to hurt you. But trust me, it’s for the best,”

Buck really hopes that one day it can be for the best, that he and Eddie would be both happy, and have good partners, but something telling Buck he would stay alone, keeping big unconditional love to his best friends inside him and never have a chance to stop loving him.

“Are we still friends?” Buck asks it fast but so so quite, that he isn’t sure that Eddie even heard it.

“Of course, Buck. You’re my best friend, and we’re family,”

“Good. I-I need some time. You know to-to understand what I can do to eventually get over you, so I-I need space, Eddie,” never in his life Buck thought he would need space from the best person who always made Buck feel good, but it’s how his life works now.

“Anything you need,” Eddie’s warm and soothing voice only adds pain to Buck's body and the tears really begin to flow again.

“Thanks, Eds, I-I see you on the shift.”

I love you that’s how Buck wants to end this call, but he swallows those words and he wraps himself in a blanket deeper, believing that he deserves one lazy day when he is drowning in pain and suffering because the universe must hate him, sending Eddie Diaz into his life and not giving him a chance not to fall in love with him, but not creating Buck so that Eddie also falls in love with him.

Not tagging cause it's too late

#my wips #after 6s wip #buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #911

[bahllinsqrews]

It’s me, 🪽anon 👋 I wanted to tag @inkysocker in this too so I hope they see this. (If not I’ll send it to them too.)

I agree with you and @inkysocker’s posts on the Ni-ki situation exactly. People have the right to disagree with writing smut about Ni-ki-that’s their opinion and they 100% have the right to feel that way-but if they don’t like it, they should block it and move on. Jungwon is only a year older than Ni-ki and people have been writing smut about him for a long time, and no one bats an eye. Why is there such a double standard? People argue saying “Ni-ki just turned 18”. So, I’m curious to ask them-what exactly is the right time to start writing it by -your- standard? If people wait 3/4/5 months, it would be fine? I don’t get it. And why do people have to abide by -your- standard? It comes off as one of the biggest instances of virtue signaling I’ve ever seen

Look, I watched i-land too. Ni-ki quickly became my favorite because of his talent, sense of humor, humility and kindness-believe me, I’m protective of him too. I get it if some people can’t see him as an adult now because they’re having a hard time separating who he is now from who he was then. But the reality is, he’s growing up and he’s not a little kid anymore. Of course he’s still young and still has his innocent side but he’s certainly not as innocent as some people think he is-because they don’t think about him as a real person, they only see the perfect image that he chooses to show us. And I can understand why. I know kpop companies warp and mold idols’ images into what they want them to be seen as and it’s easy to forget that, once you become a fan and you’re deep in it. I feel like I get lost in it too sometimes. I’ll be honest, I lost my virginity at 17 and was thinking about sex long before that. If people think Ni-ki doesn’t have sexual thoughts like a normal 18 year old, they seriously need to be realistic. In addition, if people think he isn’t trying to shed his “cute”/“baby” image, they really need to get a grip too. Of course he’s still the youngest member-but this year (and esp lately) if you just look at the pictures he himself chooses to post and the tik-toks/dances he himself chooses to do you can tell he’s trying to be more serious and mature.

I have been so absolutely disgusted with the hate and vitriol I’ve seen towards people who have written anything nsfw for Ni-ki or who have talked about doing it. They literally have people telling them to k¡ll themselves, s1it, jump etc. it’s so, so sickening, not to mention triggering. It’s not funny/edgy and cute to tell someone to harm themselves or k¡ll themselves when someone posts something you don’t like-and people just say it like it means nothing. If you can’t properly articulate your stance and express your feelings about something without telling someone to k¡ll themselves, it makes you seem ignorant, immature, and honestly too lazy and vacuous to do so. It certainly does not make you seem like the better person. I know the people saying these things are young and callow but it is so hard to see. They don’t understand the weight their words hold. They have no idea what others are going through and how the recipients of their hate will react to being told to k¡ll/harm themselves. I think about how they would feel if someone actually killed themselves because of the hate they gave them and I would hope that they would actually feel sorry and ashamed but it seems like they’re so far in their narcissistic bubble with their moral grandstanding and so grossly desensitized to saying it in normal conversation that they’d be like “whatever” or “good, they deserved it”. These people are seriously not as edgy and cool as they think they are. They’re immature, twisted, and toxic. Seriously, they give me sociopath vibes. They really think they *hold the torch of wisdom and morals* meanwhile they’re telling someone to s1it their wrists and k¡ll themselves. Make it make sense. In reality, they seem like worse people than the ones they send hate too. And they’re also calling people fat and ugly and fatherless (😀?) when all else fails lmao. What is this, the 4th grade? I’d laugh if I wasn’t so disgusted. Like pls….you’re not funny 💀 Definitely exposes their elementary school/middle school selves, you can really tell how young they are when they respond in that way. Like if you don’t like it, block it. Yet instead they choose to go out of their way to send kys messages…. I can’t fathom how telling someone to k¡ll themselves makes you a better person than them.

It just makes me sick and sad honestly. I’m glad you’re strong because ik you’re probably getting a lot of hate for what you’re doing, but you always respond to it in a mature way, when you do choose to respond to it. Yeah, always feel free to delete as many hate messages as you want, don’t even give them attention. I hope it doesn’t get to you too much and I hope you’re doing well and continue to do well. Just know you’re definitely not alone and have a lot of people who feel the same way. 🩷 And I already talked about the people who send hate to you and others and the kind of people they really are.

(Sorry it was so long-I have a lot of thoughts about this)

This exactly sums up what everyone needs to hear. And a lot of people would agree without hesitation, I have screen shots of people insulting me in my Dms and comment sections and this just embodies what I am trying to get across. STAY IN YOUR CORNER OF TUMBLR!!

#kpop #smut #enhypen #enhypen nishimura riki #enhypen riki #controversy #point made #needed to hear it #get off your high horses

[saw444kowo]

a lonely night (miguel ohara x gn!reader)

‼️ consider this as the second part of the series‼️

disclaimer: it's still an ongoing series and i'll organize it when i will have written more episodes though i don't like the idea of a timeline bc it's like one shots and 🧍🏻‍♀️ idfk bro i js specified for clarity

this is the very first part of my lonely series! idk if i will make this series a miguel x reader only but :> even made my own tag 🦦

part two/one here !

also you don't need to read all the stories to like understand the plot they're js one shots and a good way to cope w my crippling loneliness (this is actually a call for help /srs

Warning: implied suicide (not really because it’s a cliffhanger but it may be triggering to some people idk so I’m still putting a warning.)

Also I’m not really sure abt the “don’t put words in my mouth” bc I’m not a native speaker but in case it isn’t clear I meant that reader basically said “don’t make me say what I didn’t say”

Also 2 there is no mention of gender bc I’m trying my best to like write for my fellow enby pals but jk reader will be fem bodied.

Also 3 I’m asking this once again but please reblog this if you liked it it helps small writers a lot please and fank yew

Also 4 BIG THANKS TO DEEPL WRITE FOR PROOFREADING THIS WHEN I WAS LAZY TO IT MYSELF some AIs need their ass ate fr

(ignore the random ass banner lmao)

You were chilling on a rooftop before you felt a familiar presence.

-What are you doing up this late, carino? Asked the voice.

You didn’t know why neither how, but somehow you instantly knew it was him.

The one who was known to save every universe despite everything.

He sure was a good leader, sometimes he was mean, but it was all for the sake of the many universes he had to protect.

He was a good leader for sure, but a good lover? There’s no way you could count on that.

You loved him very much and you know how painful it was for him to show any kind of affection, but tonight you had too much of holding everything inside.

He put his hands on your waist, sneaking a kiss on your lips before sitting next to you, both your legs dangling in the shining lights of the city.

The weather was cold for a beginning of summer, but it was nothing compared to the cold residing in your heart.

Your relationship was bound to come to an end, and you were here for this end to come.

-Is something wrong my love? Miguel hastened to ask when he noticed your expression was off.

-Do you truly love me? You asked, ignoring his question.

He stiffened at the hearing of your question.

-Of course, why wouldn’t I? he asked worried.

-Listen. I’m going to be straightforward with you. I’m pregnant. And I want the baby to have both parents when they grow up. And I think, with both of us being heroes, this won’t work. Don’t put words in my mouth, I do love you with all my heart and you know it. But I can’t do it anymore. (tears start falling on your cheeks but you continue anyway:)  I am grateful for all the things we lived but I think our relationship is meant to end anyway. I’m sorry but I couldn’t hold it in anymore.

You stood at the edge of the building and disappeared in a snap.

-Goodbye, Miguel.

~~~~

You woke up in a hurry, instinctively looking for your husband.

-Is everything ok, my love? Miguel was quick to ask. (he put a hand on your forehead) did you catch a cold or something? You seem to have a fever.

-I’m okay don’t worry! You say with a frank smile. I just had a nightmare but nothing to worry about I promise.

-Mm. If you say so, he said with a tint of doubt in his voice. I’ll stay in bed with you just in case something happens, ok?

Without waiting for your response, he forcefully got into your bed, which made you move.

You inevitably fell into your husband’s arms as he put his arm on your shoulder with your head on his chest, feeling his soft breathing and hearing his heartbeat.

Despite everything, the work he had, the countless nights you spent waiting for him to return home, even wondering if he ever would, the arguments, you were in love with him. And it even if it was hard, he and him only was the one you decided to love.

And that was beautiful.

#kaheri's lonely series #kaheri's chronicles #across the spiderverse x reader #spiderman atsv #atsv x reader #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara #miguel ohara #spiderman across the spiderverse #spiderman 2099 spiderverse #spider man 2099 #spiderman 2099 x reader #x reader #writers on tumblr #queer writers

[spellsunderthestars]

OH BTW SINCE THE OTHERS ACTUALLY NEED AN EXCUSE TO GO

Mage and Ziffer i mean ziffer i mean zipper i mean ziffer i mean Zypher went back to game. Neptune was dragged along sorry he comes back every once in a while BECAUSE HE STILL HAS A JOB. sorry chronically online guy. also sorry vamp and cerb ur husband and wife are gone. Lantern gets a break

(,,,,,,,Yes he brought the flowers)

____________________________

Avian is. Probably in the hospital. If that exists (im so sorry avy you’re going to have to befriend Pyx instead)

____________________________

Alchemist went back to the cave since Dialtone finally moved back to his cabin and it doesn’t take such a long walk to get there and back. Cloud is htere too. Sorry dialtone. Atleast there’s a lower chance of a fire AHAHA haha hahaa. ha. (looks left, looks right)

____________________________

Anger is just. Locking herself in her room for some reason. Sorry sunshine your gf is . Not happy

,,,,,Not for any reason in particular! Not for any reason in parti

____________________________

Bow’s(the cooler one) bothering his wife. No need to go deeper on this

____________________________

Skeleton’s going through the Horrors. None of you will get any context. Other than he remembered something. lol (GLARES AT SOUP)

Oh yeah and thanks to SOMEONE IN MY DMS YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE he now has the snas head !! Feiar is going to love this when he comes back i justf know it

,,,,for the room thingy, (hi soup) you get to choose whatever room you want them to stay in if you want to skip that interaction because i’m pretty sure by the time i come back zombie has FUCKING LOST IT so!!

room from 100 bc or something. the two or ATLEAST SKELETON dusted everything off. good as new !!!!!! (ignore the rats) (the breadbox is still there)

. empty room. Atleast one of them tried to bring furniture. ther es is only one bed. sorry zombie. skeleton is kinda restless when eep. that or skel won’t sleep at all

The. Other one. You don’t get to pick this. Skeleton visits it sometimes A LOT

you dont have to skip it if you don’t want to

@zombie-an0n just in case you DON’T see this

____________________________

Drama is. Having a depressive episode probably. Sorrh mimic

____________________________

Moon’s sleeping her ass off . Sorry sun your platonic gf is taking another unnecessary break

____________________________

Surfer and his brother i mean brother i mean totally uncool guy he is not related to are just. Chilling

,,,,,,Surfer is being forced to do farm work. Do with that what you will

(someone else is going to be in control of the two now)

(also hi to you know who. you may give others the username if you want to. ill probably have the surfer design by then if my lazy ass don’t catch me)

____________________________

characters that DON’T have accounts that I can remember off the top of my head i think

Therapist is. Just fucking around in Sarah’s palace. So is crowneater

____________________________

Laine (worst name i think i’ve ever given a character ever sorry lai)fell into the lake. He lives there now. Waterboy

____________________________

Robber & Rational (no, not reason. hitting you with a rolled up newspaper lily) are. Also chilling. ,,,,,,,,,Someone’s being forced to take their meds sorry robber,,,, Least Pam gets a break

____________________________

Affie (used to have account) is busy. Making gifts for no one ever. She just makes them and has them stay there. Whoever visits her is welcome

____________________________

Durian(IM SO SORRY I NAMED YOU AFTER A STINKY CANCER FRUIT) is worrying about why he can’t leave. No need to look into this. No need t

____________________________

Jinx. Already said this. Stuck in his room again LOL LOL L BOZO

________________________________________________________

CHARACTERS MENTIONED THAT AREN’T MINE

sorry for the tags lol

@sh4tt3rg1rl vamp, cerb, sun somewhere, dialtone

@theautumnaldemon or @/mod-autumn (forgot pyx tag)- Pyxel , Pam and Stranger (if I mentioned them anywhere)

@courtjesterrr sunshine, mimic, some other irrelevant guy

tagging you for another reason but don’t tell anyone that wink wink wink smirk wink

@crazy-into-you sarah, arrows

@zombie-anon zombie. i can’t remember if i named someone else sorry

im like 100% sure i missed someone else sorrh for not tagging you

____________________________

I LOVE YOU ALL !!!

#No i didn’t cry while making this post dont be silly (lying)

[jukeboxjackal]

Headcanon- Dating Jock! Carol Danvers

Carol Danvers x fem! Reader

A/n: Hey guys, hey guys. Haven’t been here in a while. If i’m not here, it’s either because of writers block, i don’t feel like it, low motivation, or just general laziness. But enjoy my first actual piece in a while though! I just write sometimes now lmfao

Ok ok so first of all, just in general information I feel like she is the softball captain. Reason being is softball is stereotypically a gay sport LMFAO but I guess it’s kind of right (I say this as a softball player and a friend haha) and I think she’d be utility playing either pitcher, catcher, or 3rd base

Anyways to follow with the last bullet, I feel like she would definitely have an undercut and show it almost allll the time. She also has a varsity letterman jacket that may or may not on the tag on the inside say: ‘Property of: Carol Danvers ⁺⁽ʸ/ⁿ⁾ ⁽ˡ/ⁿ⁾♡) You definitelyyyy did not write the second part

More in the popular crowd, whether you are too is up to you

Her arch-nemesis has got to be the volleyball captain Valkyrie. For one, they don’t get along and two, she so obviously has a thing for you

She’s usually hanging out with her friends in the halls or the courtyard, but when she sees you walk by she immediately goes to catch-up with you

She’s superr protective of you. When she’s walking with you she’s always holding your hand or she has an arm around you at all times. If anyone says anything even slightly snarky to you she’ll look them dead in the eye and say ‘Wanna repeat that?’

She also loves when you wear her clothes and especially her sports jackets, helps to show people that you’re hers

Her nicknames for you are the cliches, such as: Babe, baby, sweetheart, (Y/N/N), princess, and my lady/ girl. Whereas you like to call her: Care-bear (she acts like she hates it but you know she doesn’t), bubs, captain or cap, and baby

She does get jealous, but only when you’re clearly interested in the other person. Like when you were hanging out with that one ballet girl Natasha Romanoff who was teaching you but was also way too close to you and she told the dancer to back off

As much as I might get some hate for this, I do feel like she might have been a bit of a bully. Not in the way that she’d go out of her way to be mean to others but just to uphold a reputation. Like if she’s with her popular friends she’d snicker and make some snarky rude comment about a less-popular kid, but if you ever saw her do it she’d apologize to you and to the other secretly

She’s super sweet to you, always going over to your house and bringing you something whether it’s food or flowers

She usually gives you rides to and from school

Don’t forget about y’all’s after-game dates!

#6 on the field but #1 in your heart that’s for sure

If you were to also be on the softball team as well, she’d still treat you the same as the other girls (but behind closed doors that’s different) Like the one time where the team had lost a game and she made you guys do laps for every base you could have stolen but after that she took you out to eat and she apologized profusely

Make-out sessions in the locker room and the bleachers

If you don’t play, you still make sure to be at all of her games. Home or away, you find a way (ooh that rhymed)

Let’s not talk about that one time she was pitching and behind the cage she saw you talking to the opposing team member who had to use the bathroom

She’s your #1 gym buddy and vice-versa

Oh and she definitely said I love you first

Overall, she is the sweetest and you would consider her damn-near perfect. She definitely has her flaws but that’s with everyone. Your love is unmatchable.

Hey guys! Sorry if this wasn’t as straight to the point as my last headcanon was, but I just had a lot to say I guess lol. Anyways, I’ll probably come back to edit this in a few hours I just wanted to put something out for now. Until next time!

Thanks for reading! Feedback, requests, and inquiries are always appreciated and welcome!

#carol danvers x female reader #jock!carol #marvel imagines #carol danvers imagine #marvel headcanons

[mycurrent-hyperfixation]

Take A Chance On Me - Chapter Seven (Eddie Munson x Reader Series)

Series Summary: Corroded Coffin is lacking only one thing that could help them win the upcoming Battle of the Bands; original songs. So when a new band comes to town with a lead singer that looks all too familiar and a repertoire of original songs up their sleeves, Dustin concocts a plan that will get you to spill all of your songwriting secrets to Eddie. It’s just a few dates, right?

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Masterlist

Word Count: 8.3K

Pairings: Eddie Munson x Reader, Eddie Munson x fem!Reader

Tags: fluff, 10 Things I Hate About You AU

A/N: I honestly think this chapter might be my favourite one so far so I hope you all enjoy reading it as much as I loved writing it. The ridiculous word length has returned, but there really was just no way I could cut this chapter in two. I'm the kind of reader who loves a short chapter in a book, but I'm afraid I will become an author who has ridiculously lengthed chapters 😫. Also, I'm expecting all the chapters from here on out to be on the longer side just so you all know. I'm trying real hard to fit this fic in the 10 chapters I limited myself to, but we shall see if that goal eventuates or not. Also, I haven't given a name to readers band cause I was too lazy to think of a good one and now I'm severely regretting that decision cause I'm finding it harder and harder to dodge around it. As always, you guys are amazing and I love each and every one of you!!!

The shift had been busy, so uncharacteristically busy that you were struggling to upkeep a smiling disposition with the variety of customers that were seemingly becoming ruder as the day went on. The store was a mess, most of the records strewn haphazardly across the racks so what was usually organised into clear genre categories was now intermingled amongst each other.

When the final customer had been served and the line in front of the counter finally cleared, you let out a tired and weary sigh, allowing yourself a moment to revel in the silence that surrounded you. Bringing your hands up to your face, you lazily rubbed at your eyes, trying to ease their stinging. With a slight groan you pushed yourself away from the counter and begun the laborious task of cleaning up.

When the bell above the door chimed just as you had been about to make your way over to lock it, you couldn’t quite help the small groan of annoyance that left your lips. Composing yourself, you forced a smile onto your features and turned around to greet the customer.

“Hello. How can I help you tod-”

Your smile became genuine at the sight of Eddie Munson standing by the door.

“Oh, I’m not here to buy anything,” Eddie said. “I’ve actually come here to see one of the workers. Maybe you know her. She’s super pretty but is kind of mean to me.”

“Hmmm,” you pretended to think. “No, sorry, I don’t know anyone by that description.”

“Well that’s a shame,” Eddie responded, making his way slowly over to you. His eyes were captivating as they stared directly into yours, his gaze unwavering. “I’ve come to pick her up for a date.”

Your smile faltered slightly.

“Eddie, I didn’t bring anything to change in to and it was just so busy today so I’m sure I look like a mess and I-”

Eddie stepped closer to you.

“You look beautiful.”

But the collected demeanour that Eddie was still somehow managing to upkeep was a lie. Because he had thought that his spontaneity would be charming. He had thought that you would laugh at the fact that he had sprung the date upon you without any forewarning; after all, your response to his proposition had been less than straightforward itself. So as he looked upon you with your wearied expression, your posture slightly drooping and the bags under your eyes more prominent than usual, he wanted nothing more than to kick himself the utter stupidity of his idea.

But now he was so very close to you, his lips practically inches from yours so that his breaths became ragged and his heart began to race as all coherent thoughts seemed to leave him all at once. In that moment he so wanted to lean just that extra bit forwards, to close the distance that still sat between you and capture your lips within his own. But Eddie wanted to do things properly—to do things perfectly—for you, even though he had likely already screwed up a date that was yet to begin. So he forced himself to pull away, noticing the vibrant blush that coated your features as he did so and smiling softly to himself at the sight of it.

“Fine,” you relented. “But next time I want proper warning before we go anywhere.”

Eddie let out a sigh.

Next time.

“I’ve just got to finish packing up,” you continued. “Just give me one sec.”

Eddie waited for you by the door, casually leaning up against the wall as he watched you. And even though your hair was slightly messy and even though the weariness was clear within your eyes and even though you were still dressed in your work clothes—a simple black t-shirt that was slightly too big for you paired with black jeans—Eddie still found himself practically incapable of looking away from you.

“Okay, we’re good to go,” you called from the counter, your bag clutched within your hands as you began to flick the light switches off.

Eddie held the door open for you as you exited, waiting as you locked the door before making your way into the carpark. It was empty save for your own vehicle and Eddie’s van, the sight of both of them sitting side by side making your brows furrow slightly.

“Oh, should I leave my car here? Or should I just meet you...wherever it is we’re going.”

“No, I’ll drive,” Eddie hastily responded, chastising himself for not having thought of the issue beforehand. He should just call it all off, he thought, pretend like he was just joking about the date so that he could start afresh on another day. “I can drop you back home as well or...back here or wherever you want.”

You smiled at Eddie’s flustered state. “Okay.”

When you rounded the side of Eddie’s van you startled slightly as Eddie rushed forwards, grabbing the handle of the door before you had a chance to and swiftly opening it. The action was oddly touching as he gestured for you to hop inside.

“So where are we going?” you asked after you and Eddie were both situated inside the van.

“Well I thought we could maybe...get some milkshakes. And I rented a few movies so we could go back to mine and watch one if you’d like.” Eddie hadn’t realised how suggestive the words sounded until they fell from his mouth and lingered awkwardly in the air between you. “O-or we could just stick with the milkshakes. Or none of it if you don’t want.”

It sounded underwhelming now that Eddie said it out loud and he wished that he could have taken you to a fancy restaurant or a fancy bar or to anywhere that was slightly more highbrow than an old diner at the edge of town. He looked away from you, slightly embarrassed and half expecting you to simply get right back out of the car and leave. He wouldn’t blame you if you did.

“Ugh, you read my mind!” 

Eddie’s head whipped back up to look at you, wholeheartedly surprised to find you smiling widely.

“I was craving a milkshake all shift.”

A wide smile broke out onto Eddie’s face, his confidence somewhat renewed as he turned the key in the ignition and backed out of the carpark. The drive was quiet, a mixtape that Eddie had made playing softly through the speakers. And although it was quiet, it was nice to simply revel in each other’s company, the windows rolled down so that Eddie found himself sneaking glances towards you as the wind drifted through your hair.

The diner was deserted when you arrived, and Eddie couldn’t quite tell whether that fact made him nervous or relieved. The waitress was different to the one that had greeted you so warmly the other day, but she smiled widely and offered you a small wave nonetheless as she looked up to the chime of the bell above the door.

Eddie followed behind you as you took a seat within the same booth the two of you had sat at last time. The leather of the seat squeaked beneath him as he shuffled in opposite you, a wide smile spread across your lips as you eagerly looked down at the menu. Eddie couldn’t quite help himself from admiring you as you did so; the way your hair fell slightly in front of your face, the way you were so unperturbed by the fact that he had taken you to a diner for your first date.

When he heard the faint rumble of your stomach, he couldn’t stop the snicker that left his lips in time, your cheeks instantly reddening.

“I...um,” you stuttered. “I didn’t have time to eat lunch so-”

“Get whatever you want,” he responded softly, hoping that you knew that the smile he wore upon his lips was one of adoration.

Before you had time to respond the waitress had appeared at the end of the table, an expectant smile upon her features as she held a pen and pad before her.

“Can I get you guys anything?” she asked cheerily.

Eddie noticed the way you whipped your head back down to the menu, frantically scanning each item and their description.

“I’ll get a triple chocolate fudge milkshake and...” Eddie paused, pretending to peruse the menu to try and give you more time to decide. “And a cheeseburger, please.”

The waitress’s pen began moving across the pad.

“I’ll get...um...the...um,” you hesitated. “Actually, I’ll just get a cheeseburger as well, please.”

The waitress nodded, smiled, and then left.

“No milkshake?” Eddie asked.

“I thought you said last time that we would share.”

A wide smile broke out onto Eddie’s lips at your remembering of such a fleeting statement. It caused something warm to erupt within him, something that had his smile somehow growing and something that had him wishing that he had taken the seat beside you instead, if only he could sit just a little bit closer to you.

“Ah, yes, how could I forget?”

The two of you shared a smile.

“So how’s your song writing for the competition coming along?” you asked.

Eddie was starting not to like how the conversation always seemed to shift back to the competition whenever he talked with you. It made him feel like that was the only thing that the two of you shared in common. It made him feel like he wasn’t getting to know you as much as he so wanted to. But most of all, it made him feel like absolute shit for the sole reason that it would remind him of that stupid conversation he had had with his bandmates on that rainy night in his trailer.

“I’ve got a few songs in the works, but nothing that’s finished,” was all Eddie said, racking his brain for ways to change the subject.

“You should show me when we go back to yours to watch the movie. Maybe I could help.”

Eddie didn’t quite know what to say.

Because he had altogether forgotten that he had invited you over; that you would be in his trailer with him watching a movie that he already knew he wouldn’t be able to pay attention to. Because the thought of you perched lazily upon his couch, maybe a popcorn bowl sat on your lap, had now invaded his mind and was seemingly determined to stay there. Because the thought of you reading over the lyrics he had written and critiquing it had his palms sweating and his heart beginning to race. Because, mostly, the thought of you sitting down and helping him finish the lyrics he had begun would solidify the scheme.

Up until that point the tips you had given him had always been in passing. And whilst he had committed all of them to memory to implement into his songs later, it was almost as if, now that you had actually offered to properly help him, his betrayal was all the more real.

He was going to tell you, he decided. Tell you everything from the very beginning and just hope that you didn’t hate his guts afterwards. That was what you deserved, the truth, even if it was going to ruin whatever it was that had been blossoming between the two of you.

But then when he looked upon you, altogether realising that he had been silent for too long and the air between you was growing awkward, the words would not form within his mouth. This was so very nice, you being there with him, and Eddie couldn’t quite bring himself to ruin that.

“Okay,” he eventually managed to get out, hating himself a little bit more as he did so.  

He could tell that you had picked up on his change in demeanour; your head titled to the side, your brows slightly furrowed. But then the waitress was back, holding the cheeseburgers and the milkshake, and Eddie found himself letting out a small sigh of relief as your attention instead turned to the food that was placed before you.

A wide smile broke out onto Eddie’s lips at the sheer excitement that engulfed your features as you hastily shoved a chip into your mouth. You moaned at the taste, the sound heavenly to Eddie’s ears as his smile only continued to grow.

The two of you ate in silence, Eddie only picking at his food, the knot that had begun to form in his stomach making it tough to swallow much. You ate your burger in its entirety, practically licking the plate clean until it was just the milkshake that sat between you. Neither of you had touched it, the two straws sticking up from its centre somehow taunting you. In the end, the both of you leaned forwards at the same moment to take a sip, meeting in the middle as you each grabbed a straw. It was mesmerising, being this close to you now as Eddie found his gaze captivated within your own. You offered him a shy smile as you both took a sip, your faces only inches apart.

When Eddie pulled away it was with hesitation, already yearning to smell your perfume once more. He leaned back into his seat, trying to act nonchalant when his racing heart and raging blush said otherwise.

“So what films did you rent for us to pick from?” you enquired, leaning forwards to take another sip from the milkshake.

“Well the first one I got was Top Gun,” Eddie said.

“They have that on tape already? I swear I only just saw that at the movies.”

“What did you think about it? Like it enough to watch it again?”

“Nah it wasn’t my favourite.”

Eddie, who had been halfway through taking a sip of the milkshake, nearly spat it out in disgust.

“What was wrong with it?” There was more aggression in his voice than he had been expecting causing a wide smile to spread across your features as you stifled a laugh.

“What was the actual plot of that movie?” you questioned.

“I-it’s about the value of friendship and of one man’s valiant battle in winning respect among his superiors and-”

“No but if you look at the actual break down of the plot most of it makes no real sense. In the beginning Maverick is this cocky pilot who doesn’t listen to orders and always gets in trouble. Even when he gets into TOPGUN he still doesn’t listen to his superiors and fucks up a bunch because of it. And then when Goose dies it’s the most pivotal moment in the movie and when I watched it I thought ‘this is where Maverick is really going to change as a protagonist’. But Goose dying is in no way Maverick’s fault so there’s no lesson to learn from his death which basically makes Goose’s death pointless in the scheme of the movie and-”

Eddie smiled as he watched you ramble. He liked this, he realised, talking about pointless shit with you; even if your opinion was so wholeheartedly wrong. It felt easy and comfortable and altogether quite homely in a way he had not felt in some time.

“I cannot sit here and listen to you smear Goose’s name through the mud,” Eddie said, dramatically shuffling out of the booth before coming to stand at the end of it. You looked up at him, something close to surprise covering your features as Eddie leaned down, grabbed your hand within his and began pulling you out of the seat.

“I’m going to make you rewatch it and I shall enlighten you as to why it is a fantastic movie.”

A laugh erupted from your throat as you came to stand before Eddie, and for just a moment Eddie found himself incapable of looking at anything else. He could listen to your laugh for eternity, he thought, and he was quite certain he would never get bored of hearing it. Walking down to the counter, Eddie couldn’t quite help but smile at the fact that you had not pulled your hand away from his, your fingers still entwined. So he was very much taken aback to find that after he had left a few notes upon the counter to cover the cost of your meals, your touch had suddenly vanished.

“No no no,” you said as you remained by the counter, rifling through your bag until you procured your purse. “I’ll pay for my half.”

“Ah, no you won’t,” Eddie said, trying to grasp your hand once more to pull you out of the diner. You evaded his grip as you fished around for some money, the waitress having begun to make her way over to the both of you.

“Yes, I will. You said we were going for milkshakes and I had a whole burger so I’ll pay for-”

“Oh my god, is that Freddie Mercury?!” Eddie suddenly exclaimed, gasping as he pointed out of one of the window.

Eddie knew that the turning of your head was purely from instinct rather than anything else. He also knew that his window of opportunity in which you were distracted was altogether quite fleeting. So without thinking he bent down, wrapped his arms around your waist and lifted, rushing as quickly as he could towards the door with you now held securely against his chest.

“Eddie!” you screamed, the wide smile evident in your voice as laughter escaped from your throat.

“Quickly, we’ll miss him!” Eddie exclaimed, ignoring you as you beat down half-heartedly on his grip around your waist.

It was only once he had successfully gotten you outside that he finally put you down, laughter erupting from both of you as the sound filled the empty carpark. You clenched your hand into a fist and swung up to hit Eddie on the shoulder, unable to hide your smile as he dramatically threw himself backwards in an act of pain.

“You’re such a dufus,” you said between breaths.

You were close now, closer than either of you realised as your breathing began to return to a normal pace. The silence of the carpark was deafening now as you continued to stare up at Eddie and as he continued to stare back.

“Well I’m a dufus who wants to treat his girl right.”

His girl.

Those two words had your breath hitching in your throat and your heart racing and your palms beginning to sweat. Those two words had you itching to reach up and pull Eddie’s lips down to yours and simultaneously wanting to turn right around and sprint away in the opposite direction.

Those two words scared the hell out of you, but in the best way possible.

“Now we’ve got a movie to watch, and I have an opinion to change,” Eddie continued, his form leaving your side as he made his way over to the van and promptly opened the passenger door for you.

With a smile, you took his proffered hand and climbed inside.

His girl.

 

---

 

Eddie’s trailer was almost exactly like how you had pictured it to be; slightly messy, slightly chaotic and entirely homely.

And whilst there was the slight smell of weed that lingered within the air and whilst there were still rings of condensation on the coffee table and a precariously stacked pile of dishes in the sink, it was still obviously clear that Eddie had cleaned before your arrival. Cushions and pillows were placed carefully in the corners of the couch and there was the scent of Febreze mingling in with the weed. The thought brought a soft smile to your features.

Although the trailer was Eddie’s home he seemed remarkably out of place as the two of you entered, his hands flying from the pockets of his jeans to the roots of his hair before they came to rest crossed upon his chest. It was clear that he was watching you as you watched the room, and so you turned back towards him and offered him a smile that you hoped would clear the awkwardness that had begun to grow around you.

“I’ve got some popcorn if you wanted me to cook that before we put the movie on,” Eddie said, his voice slightly wobbly. He cleared his throat, trying against all hope to compose himself, not altogether too sure as to why the sight of you within his home made him so nervous in the first place.

“Okay,” you said. “But I thought you were going to show me that song.”

Eddie stilled.

He had so wished that you would forget about it; that he could get through this date without any more mention of the competition or song writing so that maybe he could pretend that this date was a date and nothing more. That there had never been any ulterior motive for wanting to spend time with you. But from the expectant look upon your face, Eddie knew that he could not avoid the topic without the transition in conversation seeming unnatural.  

“Y-yeah, of course,” Eddie said, his voice slightly softer than he had intended.

With each step that Eddie took towards his room and with each step that you followed, something began twisting in the pit of his stomach. Eddie was not one to get nervous very often, but now, having you in his home eagerly awaiting to read something he had written, it was as if he couldn’t quite get his nervous system under control. Eddie had never done cocaine—had, in truth, never done anything harder than ketamine—but he was quite sure that what he was feeling in that moment must feel similar.

But then there was you, strolling quite happily down his hallway, completely unaware to the wreck that Eddie was slowly becoming in front of you. He wanted to stop, he wanted to turn around and he wanted to lead you towards the tv and put on a stupid movie. He wanted to maybe drape a blanket over the both of you and he wanted to pretend to yawn as he wrapped an arm around your shoulders and he wanted to entwine his fingers in yours if you would let him.

But then he was swinging his door open and leading you inside to where he had thankfully had the foresight to at least make his bed even though he had not expected you to ever venture this far into his trailer. You were smiling softly up at him as he turned around to face you, still just as excited and just as expectant to see his work as you had been back at the diner.

“I like how you’ve hung up your guitar,” you said absentmindedly, walking further into the room to inspect where it was hanging upon the wall. And although Eddie was perfectly well aware that you knew your way around a guitar, although he was quite positive that you would treat his guitar with as much care as you did with yours, he still couldn’t quite help himself as he leaned over you and plucked the instrument off the wall before your outstretched hand could touch it. The action happened so quickly that at first Eddie’s shocked expression mirrored your own. He thought for just a moment that he had offended you, that you would turn right back around and leave his trailer without another word. But then you were leaning your head back, a laugh escaping from your throat.

Eddie breathed out a sigh.

“Someone’s touchy,” you teased, reaching out with your index finger to try and lay it just once upon the guitar. Eddie, a wide smile now upturning his lips, pulled it away once more.

“I can never be too careful around the competition.”

“You’re putting some ideas in my head now, Munson.”

Eddie let out a slight chuckle as he threw himself backwards upon his bed, strumming lazily upon the strings of his guitar. His eyes flickered over to you as you wandered about his room, lazily glancing over every surface until your eyes became transfixed upon his shelves.

“You’ve got quite the collection here,” you said with a whistle as you flicked through the multitude of records that sat stacked upon the shelf. “Why do you have two of the same album?”

Eddie’s eyebrows shot upwards as you pulled out one of his two copies of Master of Puppets, desperately trying to rack his brain for any kind of explanation. The truth would sound too stalkerish, he was quite sure.

“Oh, wait, this one’s scratched.”

Eddie shot upwards.

“You scratched my record?” he exclaimed.

“No! It was scratched when I picked it up.”

“I cannot believe you scratched my record.”

You opened your mouth to defend yourself once more, but upon turning to look at Eddie, you found his lips upturned in a taunting smile. With a roll of your eyes, you turned your head away in an attempt to hide your own smile, placing the record back upon the shelf before returning to your perusal. Eddie’s gaze returned back to his guitar, his fingers plucking the strings absentmindedly.

“Do you have anything that’s not metal?”

“Why would I need anything that’s not metal?” Eddie asked back.

“For some variety. Do you not get bored listening to this stuff all the tim–oh my god.”

Eddie whipped his head up to look at you as a shocked gasp fell from your lips, his eyes scanning your figure hurriedly in search of whatever had pained you. But instead, you simply turned back around to face him slowly.

“I knew it,” you said. Eddie furrowed his brows. “I knew you were hiding something from me.”

Eddie’s eyes went wide.

You knew the truth.

Although how you had come across it he wasn’t altogether too sure, for he was quite positive that there was nothing within the shelves of his records that would have led you back to the plan. Eddie’s heart began to race now, his hands sweating as he gripped his guitar so tightly his knuckles began to go white. He needed to provide you with an explanation, he knew, or at least an apology. But suddenly his mouth had gone completely dry, and he was quite positive that if he attempted to speak nothing would come out.

But then your lips were upturning into a wide smile and Eddie could do nothing other than continue to stare back at you, now thoroughly confused.

“You’re a Neil Diamond fan,” you said, procuring a record from his shelf.

Eddie let out a sigh and had to refrain from bringing his hands up to rub at his eyes, all the tension and stress leaving his body all at once. If you noticed, you didn’t say anything as you turned your attention back to his shelf.

“Oh my god!” you said again. “Billy Joel too?”

At the sight of your sheer excitement, Eddie couldn’t quite stop the small smile that returned to his lips.

“They’re my uncles,” Eddie said.

“And yet they’re in your room.”

“I promise you I have never once listened to those records.”

“Well then your missing out because your uncle has got some good taste.”

You returned the Neil Diamond record back to the shelf and pulled the Billy Joel one from its casing, practically skipping over to Eddie’s record player before placing the record gently down onto the turntable.

“No,” Eddie said, jumping up from the bed and following you. “If we’re listening to music it’s not going to be Billy Joel.”

But a song had already begun playing and your hips had already begun swaying and so Eddie found himself quite incapable of following through with his intentions, too transfixed by the sight of you dancing within his bedroom. The song was slow, one that Eddie was unfamiliar with although that came as no surprise. But then, as the vocals began, Eddie found his breath hitching in his throat at the sound of your voice filling the room too.

“Don't go changing to try and please me

You never let me down before, mmm

Don't imagine you're too familiar

And I don't see you anymore.”

Seemingly as if it were moving of its own volition, Eddie watched as his hand came up to outstretch before him, reaching to grasp your hand within his own. He half expected you to pull away, but you didn’t as you allowed him to slot his fingers in between yours. You turned to face him, a soft smile directed up at him, before Eddie pulled you gently into him. The action was slow as the both of you began to sway to the music, something thick and palpable growing in the air between you.

You were close now, so very close that Eddie couldn’t quite seem to stop his gaze from flickering down to your lips. It would be so easy to just lean forwards, he thought, for the space between you now was practically non-existent. But he didn’t, too busy revelling in the sight of you like this before him. So the two of you continued to sway as Billy Joel continued to sing, and when you shifted your head to lay upon Eddie’s chest, never stopping in your motions, Eddie thought it likely that his heart might explode. He closed his eyes, not quite believing that this was all real.

But then the song was coming to an end and your warmth was suddenly leaving him as you pulled away. He opened his eyes and followed you as you walked over and perched yourself upon the bed.

“So let’s here this song you’re struggling with.”

Eddie thought he must have done something wrong. But then there was the sight of your familiar smile being directed right at him and he felt the anxiety in his chest ease slightly.

Eddie thought about lying; maybe saying that he had forgotten the lyrics or that it was more a single chord progression than an actual song. But then he turned to look down towards you—a soft smile curving your lips, your hair falling slightly in front of your face—and he found the lies dying upon his lips. So instead he reluctantly made his way over to his chest of drawers to where a series of stray pieces of paper were scattered haphazardly across the surface. Old receipts, napkins, torn off pages of books had all been vandalised in his messy handwriting. He had thought about cleaning the space before your arrival, but the space was an organised mess that worked quite well in collating Eddie’s song ideas and so he hadn’t been able to bring himself to move anything around.

He rifled through the papers before his hand came to rest upon an old school quiz, lyrics written lazily within the margins. It wasn’t anywhere near how neat Eddie imagined your notebook to be, and so found himself growing quite embarrassed as he eventually handed the paper over to you before reclaiming his place upon the bed once more and laid down.

In an attempt to fixate his gaze anywhere but on you as you read, Eddie fixated his eyes upon the ceiling as he brought his guitar up once more and began strumming at the strings.

“This is really good, Eddie.”

The sincerity in your voice warmed him.

“Can you play it for me?”

Eddie stilled.

He had played so many concerts in front of so many people and had barely batted an eye. But now, here, in front of you, Eddie couldn’t quite fathom plucking the strings of his guitar and singing into the empty air that sat between you. His hands began to sweat, his grip upon his guitar tightening as his breathing grew ragged. But then as he turned to look at you with your kind eyes and your gentle smile and your calming presence, Eddie felt his nerves melt away, his fingers dancing across the strings seemingly of their own volition until he was playing the opening notes of the song.

“Eighteen, crazy

Pulled up in your daddy’s car

You wanna move in with me

Guess we’re off to a heavy start.”

As Eddie played—his back laying against the mattress of his bed, his guitar perched across his stomach, his gaze fixated anywhere but on you—he felt you shuffle slightly from where you had been sitting upon the edge of the bed. You grew closer now as you mimicked Eddie’s positioning and laid down next to him, the mattress dipping slightly. Eddie kept his gaze upon the ceiling, knowing that if he turned to look at you he would not be able to look away. But his attempts were in vain as the shadow of your smile became visible in his peripheral vision and he found his head turning towards you anyway.

“So if you wanna piss off your parents

Date me to scare them

Show them you’re all grown up.”

Eddie found himself quite thankful that he had gotten no further in writing the chorus for he was quite sure that if he had continued to sing as his gaze landed upon you his voice would have surely cracked. For there you were lying next to him in his bed; an image that had only ever been real in the depths of his mind. And you were so very close to him now, the heat emanating off of your skin warming his body slightly, the smell of your perfume completely engulfing him.

“It’s…um…it’s better with the drums and bass and…stuff,” Eddie whispered into the silence that sat between you.

“I think it’s really good already.”

Eddie thought as he stared at you that if he inclined his head and leaned forwards just slightly—an action that would in theory take no effort at all—his lips would be on yours. They would be soft, he was quite positive as his gaze flickered down to them, so soft that he felt like nipping and sucking at them until they were swollen from his ministrations.

“I like it like this anyway,” you continued.

Eddie’s gaze flicked back up to your eyes, a raging blush erupting onto his cheeks as he swiftly turned his head away to hide it, pretending to instead look down at his guitar.

“What do you mean?”

“I like your voice like this. Without all the drums and guitars and loudness that you hide behind.”

“I don’t hide behind loudness.”

“Well it’s still nice to hear your voice properly,” you said, and Eddie could feel himself blushing at the compliment. “Is that as far as you’ve gotten with the chorus?”

“Ugh, yeah. I’ve tried a couple different lines but nothing seems to be fitting quite right.”

“Play me the beginning again.”

Eddie hesitated as you suddenly jumped up from where you had been laying, leaning down to rifle through your bag. You procured the black notebook that Eddie often saw in your possession, and a pen along with it before you returned to the space next to him, motioning for Eddie to play. So he plucked at the strings and hummed along where he should have sung, not altogether trusting his voice as his blush persisted.

“Play the next two counts of four.”

Eddie did as he was told, distracted slightly as you began scribbling away hastily.

“Okay now play them altogether.”

Eddie began to pluck at the strings and found himself becoming wholeheartedly surprised as you began to sing the lyrics he had just sung. The sound of his words upon your tongue sounded so very heavenly that Eddie felt something stir within him, something that he could not allow himself to acknowledge lying down so close to you. He pushed the thought from his mind, trying to regain focus, until he began to play past the lyrics he had written and realised that you were still singing.

“If long hair and tattoos are what attract you

Baby then you’re in luck.”

The smile that spread across Eddie’s face was wide, paired with a slight chuckle that escaped from his throat. When he turned back to look at you an equally wide smile was mirrored upon across your lips.

“What inspired those lyrics?” Eddie asked teasingly.

“Oh, you know, just this guy I know.”

Eddie’s eyes flickered down to your lips once more, slightly mesmerised by the smile that continued to grow there.

“Play the rest of the chorus. We can finish this thing.”

“Okay okay,” Eddie said, laughing at your eagerness.

Eddie plucked the chords for the rest of the chorus before he turned his gaze away from his guitar and back to you. Your brows were furrowed now, your face contorted into a look of concentration as you hummed the tune back to yourself over and over. Eddie played the chords once more, turning his mind to the lyrics before he found his own voice filling the room.

“And I know it’s just a phase

You’re not in love with me.

You wanna piss off your parents, baby

Piss off your parents, that’s alright with me.”

Eddie smiled to himself, laughing slightly at the lyrics. He liked the song, liked how funny it was and how much it had made the boys laugh when he had showed it to them. But then he was turning back to face you once more only to find that your smile had vanished. Your face was slightly serious now, and Eddie wasn’t altogether too sure why.

“What’s this song about, Eddie?”

The question was a simple one, and yet Eddie found himself wanting to change the topic. Because of course you had seen past the layers of humour he had infused into the song. Of course you had seen past the joking lyrics to what lied beneath them; a part of himself that he had hidden away a long time ago.

The comfortable air had changed between you now, something thick and heavy taking its place instead. Eddie thought about lying, about passing the song off as just the joke that he had intended it to be. But somehow he knew that you would see past that as well, that you would always see past the lies and the jokes until there was just him and all of his tainted self laid out bare before you.

“Artists always write songs about love,” Eddie found himself saying, his voice less firm than he had wanted it to be. He turned his gaze up to the ceiling, wishing that he could not feel the heat of your stare as you listened intently. “But I’ve never…” Eddie paused, composing himself. “I’ve never had anything like that before.”

Eddie heard the shuffle of your arm as it moved closer towards him, felt the soft touch of your fingers as they entwined with his. Something in his chest eased slightly as the warmth of your skin washed over him, the callouses on the pads of your fingers mirroring his own in a way that was so oddly comforting.

“In high school I would get so excited whenever anyone would show any kind of attention to me. There were a few times when girls would flirt with me for a while and then they would invite me over to their place or they would want to come here, and we would…you know.” Eddie couldn’t say it out loud. “And then when were done they would get changed and then they would tell me to never tell a soul what we did.”

Eddie felt your hand squeeze his gently and he braved a look towards you. Your eyes were so soft as they met his, so patient and gentle that for just a moment Eddie felt like crying.

“It’s not great for the confidence having people so repulsed by you that they won’t even be seen in public with you.”

“Well then they’re missing out.” Eddie felt a small smile tug at the corner of his lips.

But the air was still slightly awkward now as neither of you quite knew what to say. Taking in a deep breath, concentrating on the way that Eddie’s hand was holding your own so very firmly, your voice filled the room.

“Do you remember when I told you that I steal the stories in my songs from other people’s lives?”

Eddie nodded, barely allowing himself to breath as your gaze flickered away from his. He didn’t quite know how the both of you had ended up like this; spilling parts of yourselves you had not uttered to anyone in years. But in a weird way he kind of liked it. He would be lying if he said that telling you about his past hadn’t eased a weight from his shoulders. He would also be lying if he said he hadn’t been immensely intrigued by the allusions Robin and Steve had made about your own past. The thought made him feel slightly repulsed by himself, but he did not stop you as you continued.

“Well that’s because my run-ins with relationships have all been very…fake.”

Eddie wanted to tell you to stop if you so wished, wanted to tell you that it wasn’t necessary that you share something deep just because he had. But then as he looked upon you, your gaze still fixed to the ceiling, he realised that maybe you were feeling the very same relief that he had just felt at having shared something that had been buried for so long. So he decided to just listen as you continued.

“The first time anyone ever asked me out was in freshman year.” Your voice was soft now and far too timid for Eddie’s liking. “It was a guy in the year above me who was on the basketball team, so of course I said yes. We were supposed to go to Olive Garden for dinner and so I showed up and I waited and I waited but he never came.” Eddie squeezed your hand in what he hoped was a reassuring way. “Turns out he’d only asked me out on a bet. Apparently the basketball team had a bet going to see who could get a date with a freshman the quickest.”

Eddie felt a rage so intense and so powerful erupt within him. He wanted to find the entirety of that basketball team and connect his fist repeatedly with their faces. He wanted to pin them down and make them hurt just as they had made you hurt. But just as Eddie had been about to offer whatever semblance of reassurance that he could, you continued.

“And then in sophomore year Tommy H asked me out and I stupidly said yes again. We watched a movie at his house but before we had even gotten through the first scene his hand was trying to get down my pants. So I left and the next day he had told everyone that I had shown up to his house uninvited and blown him in the doorway. I didn’t even know he had a girlfriend until Carol was throwing a drink in my face.”

Eddie so wished that he could do something to ease the pain so evidently written across your features. He wished that he could do anything other than simply continue to hold your hand, completely at a loss for how to do anything to comfort you. He felt entirely useless within that moment, and he loathed himself for it.

When you eventually turned your gaze back to Eddie he felt his breath hitching within his throat. Something had changed between you now, something that made the air just a little bit more breathable, a little bit more comfortable. Your gaze was intense as it bore into his, seeing him in a way he had not been seen in so long. For just a moment he felt like turning away from you. But he didn’t. Instead he held your gaze for as long as he could, moving his head infinitesimally closer to yours until your lips were inches apart.

He could feel you now; the heat emanating from your skin, the electricity in your touch as his hand still remained firmly in your grasp. His eyes danced across your features, drinking in the sight of you like this before him, so breathtakingly beautiful that if Eddie were to suddenly wake up from a dream, he would not be altogether surprised. He drunk in the soft curve of your lips and the line of your jaw and the glimmer in your eyes. Your breath was hot against his cheek now, the feeling oddly comforting.

Without thinking, Eddie brought his hand up to tuck a strand of your hair back behind your ear, his fingers brushing against your cheek as he did so. You shivered slightly at his touch, revelling in the soft caress of his skin against yours. His hand lingered upon the curve of your jaw, holding you there so gently that you closed your eyes at the touch.

He didn’t deserve you, Eddie thought to himself, not like this. He didn’t deserve the way your lips curved slightly upwards as you leaned into him further, he didn’t deserve the way his heart seemed to flutter at the realisation that this was all real. Because after everything that you had told him, after you had essentially put your heart onto a platter and entrusted it within his grasp, he was still withholding something from you. He wished that he could erase that conversation he had had in his trailer on that rainy night. He wished he could go back in time and kick himself for ever having agreed to such a stupid plan.

You deserved the truth, and Eddie knew that he had to give it to you. You would hate him, he was quite sure. You would get up and leave and he would be left behind still lying upon his bed completely still as he tried to remember this moment when you had been his for just a second. Eddie breathed in deeply, trying to burn this moment into his memory forever before he ruined it all.

“Eddie,” you whispered into the silence that sat between you, your voice entirely breathless.

“Yes?” he breathed back, quite grateful that you had spoken first for it served to prolong the moment if only slightly.

“Do you remember the song I sang at the last round of the competition?”

“Yes,” he breathed again, unable to stop the smile from upturning his lips.

“It wasn’t about Robin.”

Kiss her you fool.

Eddie wished that he had found the strength to pull away from you in that moment, just like he had managed to do back in his van after the party. But that moment felt like a lifetime ago, and Eddie could not quite fathom how he had accomplished such a feat when you were right here before him, baring all of yourself.

So in the end, he barely even hesitated as he traversed the distance that still sat between you and connected his lips to yours. In that moment he hated himself more than he ever had before, but he could not quite manage to regret his actions. For you were so warm and soft and breathtakingly delicious as your hand left his grasp and instead came up to tangle within his hair, your other hand cupping the back of his neck as you tried to pull him impossibly closer.

The kiss was slow at first, the both of you tentatively mapping the other out. It was hesitant and cautious and entirely breathtaking. He had been right, Eddie realised, your lips were so impossibly soft against his. Eddie brought one hand up to clutch at your waist, needing to feel you completely against him. You smiled slightly against his lips at the action, tangling your legs within his.

And then, slowly, the kiss became more heated. There was a hunger now that consumed the both of you, something that made you want to devour each other. You were the one to deepen the kiss first, and Eddie couldn’t quite help himself from moaning at your taste. With one hand still fixed firmly to your waist, the other cupping your face, Eddie pulled you somehow closer into him until he was suspending himself above you, your chests pressed together in such a way that he was quite sure you could feel the rapid beating of his heart.

He thought it quite likely that he could spend forever with you in that moment even though his lungs had begun to burn quite painfully and he was starting to get slightly lightheaded. The thought oddly terrified him, for he could not seem to pull away from you.

In the end, it was you who had to pull away first, and whilst Eddie found himself swallowing a disappointed groan, he was altogether quite grateful for the action as he inhaled deeply. He kept his head pressed against your forehead however, unwilling to let your touch leave him completely.

The sight of you panting beneath him stirred something in Eddie that he dared not acknowledge. He wanted nothing more than to connect his lips with your neck, trailing his kisses downwards, covering every square inch of you. He wanted to lift his shirt off and feel the slight callouses of your fingertips run along his skin. He wanted to kiss you anywhere that you would let him, touch you anywhere that you would let him until it was only you that he could feel, only you that he could hear, only you that he could taste.

But he would not allow himself to indulge in such pleasures; not whilst he continued to run away from the truth that you deserved to know.

So he pulled away, and he continued to pull away until there was just the sweet voice of Billy Joel masking the sound of your panting.

“But she'll bring out the best and the worst you can be

Blame it all on yourself 'cause she's always a woman to me.”

---

Songs Used:

- Just The Way You Are by Billy Joel

- 18 by Anabor

- She's Always A Woman To Me by Billy Joel

---

Taglist:

@alicetweven​ @juggernort @theh3aven​ @manamitoyota​ @mimiluvsualot​ @cherrypieyourface​ @kaqua​ @c0untryclub​ @goldencherriess​ @emotionaldreamer​ @givemethesleep​ @milkiane​ @miscreantsnopossoms​ @legendaryfestsoul-blog​

Series Taglist

@grungegrrrl​ @thirddeadlysin​ @boomitsallie1​ @renaroo123​ @wordsthatwaterflowersinyoursoul​ @annnnn91​ @bakugouswh0r3​ @aivilovio​ @wannabewiedzma​

#eddie munson #eddie x reader #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson stranger things #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x female reader #stranger things s4 #stranger things season 4 #stranger things #dustin henderson #steve harrington #robin buckley #joseph quinn #Joe Quinn

[morkofday]

5 Songs Tag - QL Shows Edition

tagged by vi @feralmuskyscentedhoepran​​ ♥ thank you once more for thinking of me with these cool tag games ^^ 

When you get this, list 5 songs from the Asian QL media that you actually listen to.

🎶They do not have to be custom-made for the series. 🎶Non-western tracks only. Let's support Asian music and languages! 🎶Feel free to tag anyone who may be interested in participating. 🎶Add #5qls tag to your post for others to find the new favourites!

all of these will be from thai shows as i mostly pick up songs from those. i've also been watching mainly thai shows lately so i don't have much else to choose from, sorry...

I. ข้างกัน (City) - Fourth Nattawat and Gemini Norawit (Cover) My School President OST / Original by Three Man Down

To be honest, I love both the original version and this cover from MSP. The cover just holds double the meaning. It is both part of TinnGun’s story – their first meeting, their beginning, the reason why Tinn fell for Gun and why they fit together now – and PuenTalay's story in their own universe. It connects these two universes too, and that is why I’m so fond of it. Also, Gemini and Fourth make this song sound even softer than it already is. (My other favorites from MSP ost are Healing, Let Me Tell You, and the cover of Just Being Friendly, tho the whole soundtrack is just phenomenal.)

II. ใครคลั่งรักกว่ากัน (Madly in Love) - Jimmy Jitaraphol and Sea Tawinan Our Skyy 2 x Vice Versa OST

This song is so very PuenTalay but also so JimmySea. It’s extremely soft, romantic, a little playful, cute, and just loving all the way around. It compliments both of their voices and styles, and just makes me super happy. The lyrics are nice too. My favorite part is the one where Jimmy changes the way he sounds in the chorus (Idk what to call it sorry). It’s towards the end of the song. It’s just super cool somehow and very addicting.

III. คลาด (Over the Moon) - Khaotung Thanawat The Eclipse OST

Absolutely obsessed with this song. One of the best theme songs a BL has ever had, hands down. Truly lived up to the hype I got from hearing this song in the mock up trailer. I love Khaotung’s voice, the visuals in the MV, the lyrics, the instrumental. Overall just a perfect song for me specifically. (To be fair, The Eclipse has had two of my favorite soundtracks with this and their Our Skyy 2 song. Instant hits, no question.)

IV. ก่อน - Pchy Dew The Movie OST

I don’t think any other piece of media has ever made me feel the way Dew The Movie does. It was, and still is, simply everything to me. And this song. This song. I cannot put into words how perfect, how wonderful, how special this song is. I cry every time I hear it because it’s just so fully packed with all these feelings I cannot describe. I love it. I love it so much. And for the love of god, if you haven’t watched this movie, go do it right now. 

V. ร้อยล้านวิว (Million views) - Stamp Last Twilight Pilot Trailer 

I don’t know how well this song fits the criteria for this game but I found this lovely thing bc of the Last Twilight trailer and now I cannot get rid of it. It’s been on my playlist ever since this trailer dropped in November and not a day goes by that I don’t listen to it. It’s just so good and always brings me back to these moments. I keep hoping they would keep this song in the show itself or that they will get an OST that sounds similar, instrumental and lyrical wise. Bc my god did this song hit again once I stopped being lazy and looked up a translation for the lyrics. Now I’m crying even more bc of it thanks.

Bonus: พระเอกจำลอง by Getsunova from the Theory of Love OST. One of my eternal favorites. This song just is the show.  Special mentions: These are western songs so I didn’t want to include them to the list itself but I have to mention that Blueming brought me back to sød ven’s music bc they used the song hollow for the show (the beach scenes to be specific). I am forever grateful. Also, I love the songs both Not Me and Never Let Me Go used in their soundtracks, specifically this one and this one (both are instrumental as these shows have made me appreciate instrumentals a lot more too).

Tagging: @dimpledpran​​ @snimeat​​ @wanderlust-in-my-soul​​ @dragonsareawesome123​​ @oswlld​​ @leonpob​​ @stormyoceans​​ @ayan-sukkhapisit​​ @nongnaos​​ ♥ 

#tag game #5qls #this is not that very diverse but #i am still so surprised every day that #these days i enjoy the bl osts a lot #in the past is used to not like them haha #but now it feels like they drop banger after banger #or maybe it's just bc i love many of the singers so much?

[thewildlorelei]

Love is Sick and Love is Blind (Mob AU)

pairing: wally darling/original female character(Millie Morning)

rating: M

pretty obvious but this is fan content of welcome home

author's note:  Millie is my Welcome Home oc! Millie is a bunny puppet so there will be mention of things like her ears and tail and bunny feet. Just didn’t want people going in and being confused about the bunny talk. I will add reference art for what Millie looks like in this au once I get around to actually designing it lol. The design and concept for Mob Boss Wally comes from the Welcome Home Mob AU from clownsuu which is also linked. I highly recommend you check out their stuff if you haven’t already, it’s amazing. Please also note that this is more inspired by their au so I will be adding some of my own interpritation of things and won’t be 100% accurate to their canon lore for the au. Ok I think that’s everything for now, sorry this is so long lol Also the inspiration for the garden comes from "The boss's garden" on AO3 by Anonymous.

ao3 link, check here for tags related to rating

Mob Boss Wally Darling

Chapter 1 - Somewhere Only You Know

Today just had to be the worst day of Millie’s life. Why else would she be hiding away in the corner of a magnificent garden crying. She was in the most beautiful garden she had ever seen and she was sitting there, not enjoying any of it.

To be honest she shouldn’t even be here. She didn’t know who owned this garden. It was in the middle of town and didn’t seem to be a public place so she was technically trespassing. It wasn’t her fault though. She just needed a place to hide for a bit, just until she calmed down. There wasn’t anyone else here that she could see so she figured she was relatively safe.

Millie had only been living in the city for a couple of months now but things were already going badly. She just didn’t know what to do anymore, and so here she was crying. Because crying was what she was good at, it was like she was born to cry. She did it all the time, over every little thing. Most people around her thought it was annoying, that she was just being dramatic and a big cry baby. It really bothered her that they thought that, as if she could control it.

She wiped at her eyes under where they were hidden by her bangs, trying to stem the flow. It wasn’t helping. She had created a wet spot on her skirt where she had been leaning with her head on her knees. She was trying to think about her options, what she could do about her problems that were piling up. That was until a voice startled her from her thoughts.

“Hello there, neighbor.”

Millie gasped. Her ears shot straight up as she quickly lifted her head from her knees. There was a man standing beside the fence leading to her hiding spot. He was short, about the same height as her, his hair was blue and curly and pulled up into a messy roll on top. Curls fell loose beside his ears and down between his eyes. He was dressed nicely with striped pants, a white button-up shirt with the sleeves rolled up, suspenders, and a red ascot. A too large jacket was draped around his shoulders and he had his hands in his pockets. But the thing that was most notable about him was the scar over his right eye.

The eye was closed, she wondered if that meant it was gone. His other eye was trained on her, half lidded with an almost lazy look. He was smiling, so at least it didn’t seem like he was mad to find her here.

“I don’t mean to interrupt but I heard you crying.”

“Oh! I’m so sorry, is this your garden? I didn’t mean to intrude, I didn't think anyone was here.” She started to get up, wiping at her eyes again. “It is, but that’s alright, I usually come here to be alone, but it seems like you needed some alone time too.” He said with a laid back smile on his face. She couldn’t help but blush in embarrassment at getting caught, happy her face was so hidden behind her hair.

“I’m really sorry, I’ll just go.” Millie started to move from the corner she was in.

“You can’t leave yet, you’ve made me so curious why a beautiful girl like you is crying by herself in my garden.” He gave her a charming smile. “Please, walk with me. I’ll show you around the garden and you can tell me about it.” He tilted his head to gesture that she should come over to him. He had an intimidating air that she couldn’t quite place. It felt like he must be in charge of something, he had a commanding presence. She really didn’t want to upset him but she also knew not to trust strange men. He must be rich and powerful, she thought, for him to own such a large beautiful garden in the middle of the city.

He must have sensed her hesitation. “I promise I’m a good listener.” That was it, she couldn’t just walk away when he was being so nice about it. And honestly? She really could use someone to talk to, and she didn’t have anyone else at the moment. She smiled. “Alright. I would love to see the garden after all. I used to do some gardening myself, this place is magnificent.”

He led them over to a brick pathway that wound its way through the whole garden. He slowly walked beside her with even relaxed steps, pointing out a couple of things here and there that he liked most. About halfway through he slowed his pace. “So tell me, what brought you to my garden?”

She looked away. “Oh it all feels so silly now.”

“I’d like to hear about it anyway.” There was a slight tone in his voice that made her feel like this was more of a demand than a request. “Well, I moved to this city only a couple months ago. I moved in with my grandparents cause they are the only family I have left and I had nowhere else to go after my mom died. I didn’t have enough money to support myself at the time and they were nice enough to let me stay.” She started to fidget with her hands again. “But..they have changed since I was little. They have very strong expectations for people and have rigid ideas on what a person should be and do with their life. I ended up lying to them about what I was doing for work because I knew they wouldn’t like it.”

“What do you do?”

“I’m a bartender. I really enjoy it actually, despite the drawbacks.” He nodded in understanding. “But this morning they found out what I had been doing. They were so mad, more than I thought they would be. They said what I was doing was sinful and that if I was going to do the devil's work that I wasn’t allowed to live there anymore. Not only that, they told me that they were disowning me, that I wasn’t their granddaughter anymore.” Her voice was tight, trying to swallow the tears that were forming again.

“I’m sorry to hear that. Family should be there for each other no matter what. And disowning family? Just deciding you don’t want to be family anymore? It doesn’t make sense. Family is for life.” There was something intense in the way he talked about it. “You must be very close to your family.” Millie prompted. “Oh yes, my family is everything to me.” She smiled. “That sounds so nice.” There was longing in her voice. They continued walking in silence for a moment.

“You know, that doesn’t actually explain how you ended up here in the garden.” “Oh yeah. Well, it’s sort of related. Like I said, I work at a bar nearby and a couple of days ago there were these two guys in there giving me a hard time. I work alone most of the time, except for the bouncer of course. They were so drunk and just wouldn’t leave me alone and I finally had to kick them out. They were pretty upset about it. They kept yelling and threatening to send the mob after me for treating them like that. It did freak me out a little.”

“The mob, huh?” He said, a hint of mirth in his voice. “What did these guys look like?” She described them to him and he hummed. “Sounds about right. I don’t think you’ll have to worry about them. Either they were lying about being in with the mob or they are so low level that no one will care if they got kicked out of some bar.” “Oh really? That’s honestly such a relief. I’m not trying to get on someone’s bad side right after I just got to this town.” Millie stopped for a moment to admire a bush of incredible multi-colored hydrangeas.

“Anyway, today I was taking a walk trying to clear my head and I just happened to see those men ahead on the street coming towards me. I was so upset from getting kicked out earlier and I really didn’t want to chance anything happening with them so I came down the alley over there.” She pointed to the fence where you could see a gap in the buildings on the other side. “I think they saw me cause they started following me down the alley. So I jumped the fence and ended up here.”

“You…jumped the fence? There’s razor wire at the top, how did you manage…?” She stuck out a foot, showing off her bare rabbit feet. “I’m really good at jumping high.” She laughed and continued her story. “Luckily it doesn’t seem like they kept following me. I was just so overwhelmed that I sat down and cried.” She turned her face away from him, feeling a little ashamed. “I cry really easy, people tend to call me a crybaby.” She laughed at herself a little.

“There’s no shame in crying, neighbor. All of that sounds like you are justified. I think I'd even shed some tears if I lost my family.” She looked back to him, giving him an appreciative smile. “So that’s it, that’s my sad story.”

“Hmm.” He thought for a moment. “What I’m hearing is that you need a new place to stay.” Her head fell forward slightly. “Yeah, I guess I do. I was planning on staying at a motel or something till I can find a new place.” She knew she shouldn’t be offering up so much information about herself to him, he was still just a stranger, but there was something about him that made her want to tell him everything.

“No, we can’t have that, neighbor.” He stopped beside a bush of beautiful shasta daisies, leaning down to pick one. He twirled the stem between his fingers. She noticed he had a silver ring on every finger on both hands.

“I know an apartment building nearby, it’s very nice, recently built. Rent’s high but I’ll give them a call and tell them I know someone looking for a place and ask them to lower rent to match what you can afford. How does that sound?” Millie was silent for a moment, shocked by the offer. “Really? That’s…that’s amazing…and..way too generous of you. We’ve only just met and you’d do that for me?”

He laughed, it was an awkward stuttered laugh, but it felt genuine. “Of course. I couldn’t very well just let you leave here knowing you had nowhere to go. Here…” He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a business card. “This is the place. Give them a call later and they’ll get you sorted out.” She took the card and just stared at it like it was too good to be true. “Wow, how can I ever thank you for helping me like this?” He brought his hand to his chin as if he were considering it. “I’d like you to stay in touch, and go out to dinner with me sometime.” Her face felt hot. “Well I suppose that’s the least I can do to repay you for helping me like this.” “Deal?” He reached out as if to shake on it. She took his hand and laughed, shaking it. “Deal.”

He turned to keep walking along the path. “There is only a little more to see, then I’ll show you the door so you can leave without hopping over the fence.” She winced. “Sorry again about that.” She could feel him looking at her so she tried to pretend not to notice.

“What do you know about the local mob?” He asked suddenly. “It’s just that you mentioned those men and I’ve been wondering how much you know since you’re so new in town.”

“Hmmm, I know some stuff. I hear things in passing working at the bar. As far as I know there are two main families in this town. The Flowers?” He nodded stiffly. “And the other is the Home family I think?” “Yeah that’s right.” He was looking at her again. She almost felt like he was testing her. So she tried to offer more. “I really don’t know much beyond that. Oh! I do know the names of the heads of each family. There’s Aster Flowers, for the Flowers family of course, and the other is Wally Darling if I remember right. The guys at the bar talking about it said he was pretty scary. I’d really hate to get on his bad side, so I hope you’re right that he wouldn’t come after me.”

He laughed again, lighting touching his fingertips to his forehead. “I don’t think you have anything to worry about.” He raised his hand, gently placing the daisy in her hair behind her ear. She felt butterflies fluttering in her stomach. There was just something so charming about him. He felt dangerous in a way but she couldn’t help but feel drawn in. They finally reached a gate that led out back to the street.

“Let me ask one last favor, let's say as ‘payment’ for entering my garden.” She laughed awkwardly again. “My sob story wasn’t enough?” “Not quite.” He sounded serious. “Um, sure.” That made her nervous, what if it was something she didn’t want to say or do?

“Let me see your eyes.”

“My eyes?” She asked. Well that was certainly much better than anything else that had flashed through her mind. “Yes.” He said, staring at her intently. She looked away for a moment. “Alright, I suppose.” She didn’t really mind, there was nothing to hide, well except for her face in general, but that was more of a comfort thing than an insecure thing. She reached up and pushed her bangs out of the way of her eyes. “It’s not like they're anything special.” She laughed to herself. He was silent for a moment. Actually maybe she was starting to feel insecure.

“Beautiful.”

Her eyes darted to his, he was so focused on her it made the heat rise in her cheeks again but this time she couldn’t hide it. His pupil dilated and his smile grew. After a moment he lightly shook his head. “Sorry for staring, but you have lovely eyes. Also that heart on your cheek is a surprise.”

She dropped her bangs, feeling safe again from having her emotions on such obvious display. “Oh yeah, I’ve always had that, kids used to tease me about it.” Ske mentally kicked herself a little, why had she said that. She thought that she better get out of there soon, this was all very intense and she felt like she needed time to breathe and think about all of this. He was staring again despite his apology for doing so, it gave her goosbumps. She thought she better thank him again and get going.

“Thank you again, mister…” She stopped, eyes going wide. “Oh! Where are my manners! You’ve been so kind and I haven’t even introduced myself.” She stuck out her hand. “I’m Millie Morning!” The smile that appeared on his face could have made her melt. “It’s a pleasure to meet you Millie.” He took her hand in his.

“I’m Wally, Wally Darling.”

#welcome home fic #welcome home mob au #wally darling #millie morning #love is sick and love is blind #i really hope y'all like this cause im so aaaaaaa about actually posting fics lol

[milfgyuu]

Hey doll! I saw you tagged for more asks like the Seventeen working at Walmart (which I LOVED btw!) and I've come to deliver! I'm at a Casino hotel overnight with The Bestie™️ and we're down at the pool! So...how about SVT working at a public pool??? 😅😅😅

bc there are so many mf's in this group i hope you don't mind me expanding a little into a hotel/water park resort.

choi seungcheol life guard i have no other reasoning behind this other than i want to see him in the cute red swim trunks ok. drowning myself in the deep end so he can give me the kiss of life. he's probably working the wave pool and like actually has to rescue people every time the big wave hits.

jeonghan is the barrtenderrrr *t-pain voice* and he has to wear that cute little formal fancy bartender fit (u know the one) and he is a prof mixologist like he's making you shit that is not even on the menu and it is amazing.

joshua works at the tiki bar in the water park so he's whipping up daiquiris and other frozen delights all day long and gets to enjoy the sunshine. humor me and picture that pretty golden glow and long sandy blonde hair okay i have a specific vision.

junhui is also a lifeguard but specifically for one of the big water slides - it's so shallow that he usually sits there are just watches all day making sure everyone is safe but witnesses hella ass crack when people try to exit the slide. so he's kind of just a glorified water monitor and buttcrack patrol.

hoshi delivers room service and knows all the hot gossip because holy shit he just left room 212 and the married guy who was just here last week was in there with a completely different woman today. besties with the entire housekeeping staff.

wonwoo is also a lifeguard (shhh there is a lot of water ok) but specifically for the lazy river so he just wades around all-day from one shady spot to the next making sure kids aren't blocking up tube-traffic. He does think it's really fun to walk against the current and considers it his workout for the day.

woozi is singing in the resort lounge like zack and cody's mom but he is getting hella hoes. tip jar on the piano is full of room #'s and key cards. he's like ahaha i'm flattered but no thanks but has given in once or twice after a little convincing from jeonghan.

minghao concierge bro he can get you into ANYWHERE because he doesn't take no for an answer. exclusive restaurant with a waitlist a mile long? reservations at 8pm with a complimentary bottle of wine, baby.

mingyu is so a cabana boy. he's got warm towels, he's got drinks, he's got a shrimp cocktail to deliver, and he's got a creepy cougar to escape from bc she won't stop making passes at him and now he's hiding in the laundry room which leaves...

boo seungkwan, the other cabana boy who is always annoyed and cursing under his breath but can turn his customer service face and voice on and off like a switch. will drag mingyu out of hiding by his hair when he notices it getting too busy.

vernon works at the resort guest check-in and has his speech so automated in his head that if someone interrupts him he loses all train of thought and has to start over. calls the bell boy just for funsies when he is bored which really pisses...

chan the bellboy off because he just ran his ass all the way across the resort thinking he was actually needed but it's just vernon fucking around with an empty lobby. fills those carts to the brim like Tetris and refuses to ask for help bc his pride says he can move all 800lbs of luggage himself.

seokmin i’m so sorry i forgot u baby it’s bc he is so busy working that resort valet parking the NIOCE cars. running around in his lil polo looking all fine and handsome like tip the man bc he uses it on his expensive cologne you can still smell when you get in ur car.

#svt #svt shitposts

[logically-asexual]

so i don’t know what to say to this one. mostly i don’t know how to feel.

this is getting long so i’m putting it under read more

first of all. of course there’s going to be perks that people want out of the patreon, otherwise why would they pay. the top tear costs 2,690 mexican pesos a month which is more than what i earned by working 10 hours this week, that’s gotta be worth something.

most of the discourse around the patreon is contradicting because sometimes people complain about there being nothing, only livestreams and merch discounts, and how that’s not fair to the people paying; and then sometimes people complain that there’s too much stuff, like the writers room and exclusive videos, and how that’s not fair to the people not paying. i don’t know what opinion to have here, mostly because i don’t have a patreon so i don’t feel like i have a right nor enough info to complain either way.

what you say confuses me because according to the descriptions of the tiers on the website the tier that gets bonus videos is the patton one, which isn’t that expensive and is the most popular one. and the top tier only gets the annual video call, surprise gifts and a poster as things that others don’t. so please forgive me but.. i don’t know if you’re telling the truth? and this is absolutely not meant as a bait for you to prove what you’re saying by telling me details you’re not supposed to. i don’t want that and don’t care about it. i just. i don’t know how to feel about all this.

i think that if thomas has this content that he wasn’t going to post anyway (i heard about a Sanders Sides episode that was sponsored but something didn’t work out with the sponsor so they couldn’t post it on youtube, and there’s also the extended versions of stuff) like then i don’t really mind that the patrons get to see it. i wasn’t going to see it anyway so who cares.

what does concern me is whether the production of patreon exclusive content is getting in the way of sharing content with the rest of us. because. if you have time to make something, and you can either do something for the public or for the patrons, then the ones paying you will always have the priority. so if the team is dedicating a lot of time to patreon, and that’s the/ part of the reason cartoon therapy is gone and the wait for sanders sides gets longer and longer every time then. im annoyed and upset. and wish they could do better.

also moving on you talk about the annual call and i am just so conflicted about that too. so much of the fandom has this parasocial i guess relationship with thomas because he’s just so nice and friendly and refers to everyone by name and replies to most things he’s tagged on etc. and that’s nice i love that and it’s made me feel very happy when he sees my silly fanart. parasocial relationships are probably not 100% bad and there’s good that can come from them, but there’s also negatives. and this thing you said about it feeling like you’re friends with him but that that could die as soon as you stop paying is really weird and i don’t know what to think about that. i personally wouldn’t sign up for that even if i had the money, my mind isn’t stable enough to process that kind of thing.

if what you say is true i definitely hate that you guys know all this information about Sanders Sides that we don’t because. i’m very upset that he’s sharing that lore and info by just like. talking about it to the paying fans. instead of actually making the damn episodes. sounds like rowling saying dumbledore is gay with zero intention of addressing it in the text, just to get attention. why don’t you behave like the professional writer that you are and go write an actual story where you address the things you’re talking about? instead you’re behaving like me, a random tumblr user with a hobby, who gives up on writing in a fanfiction due to laziness and inexperience and just posts the bullet points on tumblr to get validation.

anyway im sorry. in conclusion.

i think it’s fair that the patrons get good rewards for what you pay. i just do in fact find the specific rewards they offer questionable. not because it’s fair or not. but because of what it means for the actual videos that will be produced. the writers room and video calls will affect the series no matter how much they insist they won’t. and revealing those secrets shows that the production of the episodes isn’t going well or that it’s going the ‘tell’ route instead of ‘show’. which sucks.

#ts criticism #tstwitterasks

[lyranova]

Hello, since you make the ask game too, can I ask you 🔪🥤🧃🍬 and 🌿

Hiya Vilandel! Of course you may 🥰!

🔪 ⇢ what's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

Hmm…I guess I’ll go with the weirdest thing I googled today for a project which was “What are different parts of a ship called?” because…I need it for an AU request 😅!

🥤 ⇢ recommend an author or fanfic you love

Aaahhh the list of authors is too many 😭! I mean, I’m going to recommend all of my friends and mutuals who write (because you’re all absolutely amazing 😤💕!). I admit, these days I’ve been really bad about reading fanfic unless someone sends it to me directly (so if anyone has a fic/series/oneshot that they think i’d like or that you want me to read, please feel free to tag/send it to me)😅. But all the writers I have tagged are amazing 😤💕!

🧃 ⇢ share some personal lore you never posted about before

Personal lore that i’ve never shared 🤔…hm, I don’t think I’ve shared this but I’m actually blind in one eye. Well, partially. I have a condition called “Lazy Eye” which basically means the vision in one eye is considerably weaker, and so my brain “ignores” it. So I didn’t even know it until I was in first grade 😆. I don’t really notice a difference with my vision unless I close my “good” eye, or when it comes to my depth perception!

🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character

Hmm…this is where I realize that I don’t have very many opinions on specific, popular characters 😅. I have certain opinions on certain things in BC, but i don’t really have any thoughts about a popular fandom character 🤔. (Agwjsjzjw i’m so unfun when it comes to opinions I’m so sorry 😭!)

🌿 ⇢ give some advice on writer's block and low creativity

Take a break! Listen to some music, watch tv, go outside and enjoy nature! Just do something besides writing or art; sometimes that really, really helps (at least, it helps with me). For low creativity, that’s a little more tricky for me 😅. Usually I talk to my friends and we plot AU’s or scenario’s together and it’ll spark my creativity. But also looking at prompt lists or playing with incorrect quote generators helps a lot too!

#asks #vilandel #my lovely mutuals #ask game #truth or dare ask game #thanks for asking!