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#so forgive me if I don't really believe that she really thinks that I 'did great'
comradekatara · 2 days
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i read somewhere that, after the war, zuko at least hands hama over to the swt instead of keeping her in fire nation prisons 'till the end of her life. Which is nice, I think. But I'm also curious as to how that would work out.
Most notably: how do you think it'd go down if she were to meet Pakku? given they both have some sort of connection to kanna's life, the idea of them being forced to interact even once entertains me very much. like, old waterbending master pakku—white lotus member—who has grown up in a patriarchal society and actively forbidden women from training to fight, under the precedent they are somehow ontologically weaker, fragile, and belonging in the healing huts... THAT guy, meeting his former fiancé's old friend: (or current wife's if you go by canon, which, eugh) A woman who not only fought in the front lines but ended up becoming one of the most skilled, creative, and deadly waterbenders in history. How would he react when finding out that a woman came up with blood bending? How badly would Hama mind-fuck him?? Because I'm confident they'd hate each other's guts-- no way she'd tolerate him,,,
And on a similar note—how would Kanna feel upon reuniting wirh Hama and discovering what she put Katata through, in your opinion? Idk, I'm just full of puppetmaster thoughts today. Hama is incredibly interesting and I wish she wasn't handled so much like a Halloween Specisl creepy witch, (even though katara herself is handled and written pretty well in this episode, i think. but i digress.)
i mean obviously i think about this all the time. i personally think that zuko hands hama over to the swt upon katara's request, and she and aang personally deliver her on appa (sokka is not there, for the very deliberate reason that if he knew what they were doing he would very vocally disapprove). and so katara is sort of retraumatizing herself by doing this, but she also feels like it's necessary specifically because she needs to be able to look hama in the eye and tell her why they're not actually the same (especially now that she actually did bloodbend someone in cold blood). katara has the love and support and safety to step back from her anger and her pain and her grief and hang onto her own humanity and allow herself to be the bigger person even in moments of abject rage and acute trauma, and hama doesn't. hama is a victim of her circumstance, and that's part of what makes her so uniquely terrifying to katara, because katara has that same capacity to make people hurt, she has the same tools at her disposal, and she has the same justifications to exercise that power. but unlike hama, she hasn't actually been pushed past her limits. sometimes she can see the cliff's edge, and sometime she even teeters on the line, but hama was fully just shoved off without a parachute, and that's really what separates them above all. i think katara should be allowed to acknowledge that and forgive herself for that, even if hama doesn't directly apologize to her (although in my mind she does, and it's not enough, but it's also so much more than katara ever expected to hear). even if it is too late for hama, katara deserves to heal.
frankly, i don't really give a shit about pakku or his reaction to hama. i also don't actually think that he thinks woman are ontologically incapable of being talented waterbenders of whatever; he's a pretty worldly guy, the reason he clings to these traditions isn't born of the belief that they're grounded in logical evidence like sokka's is, it's because he believes in the preservation of a system that benefits and valorizes him. pakku thinks katara belongs in the healing huts because he comes from a culture that dictates that women belong in the healing huts. like, he might also subscribe to the bioessentialist logic that women are better healers and men are being fighters, but that honestly doesn't really matter, because (unlike sokka) his epiphany lies not in the fact that woman can fight, but in the fact that his role in upholding these systems has actively driven his loved ones away due to his cruelty. he decides to be kinder, to women and in general, because he realizes that being an asshole has negative consequences. but frankly, who cares what he thinks of hama. realizing that your sister tribe in the south deserves aid and protection after being subjected to a century of genocide is kind of too little too late imo. unlike katara, sokka, aang, or kanna, who can approach this situation from the perspective of being a genocide survivor who even remotely understands hama's trauma, pakku really has no place in this conversation to me.
as for kanna...... god. hama/kanna reunion is genuinely one of the most heart-wrenching concepts to me in all of atla. as a sidenote, hama/kanna fanfic goes so hard every time. there's a total of like 15 fanfics for them on ao3 (last i checked) but they're all sooooooo. fucking delicious. tide locked........... ugh. anyway. i cannot fathom kanna's reaction upon learning that her closest friend once upon a time is not only alive, but also a convicted felon, for crimes including but not limited to manipulating her granddaughter, violating her (and sokka's) bodily autonomy in cruel and perverse ways, and forcing her to participate in that mode of violence in a way that traumatized her forever. even if you don't read them as former lovers (although it is indubitably better that way) it's so gut-churning. kanna lost so many people over the course of her life, and to learn that one of them has returned but in the worst way possible must be mind-boggling and distinctly unreal. like how do you even process that. first, how do you process how much pain she must have went through to become the kind of person who is capable of doing this, and then, how do you process the knowledge that the person you once loved most in the world irreparably hurt the person you now love most in the world? obviously she would always prioritize katara's safety over anyone else's no matter what, but god. kanna has led such a fascinating and impossibly difficult life, and it's not over yet.
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isfjmel-phleg · 2 months
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😶 
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vespertine-legacy · 1 year
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Ok, but like. The agent's Nar Shaddaa mission had to have been about 80% unsanctioned, right? Like, yeah, go find out about and dismantle any terror cell on Nar Shaddaa, by whatever means you deem best, yes. But the means being "collaborate with a former Watcher who so deeply traumatized the rest of the Agency that they can't even talk about what happened but they thank you if you kill him" can't have been like. "plan a."
#swtor imperial agent#i really deeply feel that watcher x and watcher two have a past together#even if she wasn't at all connected to the ops that Went Wrong and eventually got him 'retired'#i think there's hero-worship there and a fear of becoming him#and a need to prove that surely she doesn't actually have anything to worry about#and sure maybe he did one bad thing (or a series of bad things)#but the conditioning is still there and still right. and the empire is still right.... right?#agent narsh is just watcher two trying to prove to herself that Everything Is Okay#and then everything backfiring spectacularly#if you couldn't trust me why would imperial intelligence give us this assignment - i don't think they did#i think watcher two did because she wants so badly to believe that even though watcher x Went Wrong he's still the Watcher she admired#and yes yes i'm sure watchers are given a large degree of freedom in terms of what specific assignments they send their agents on#but as much as she likes what's proper and 'the rules' idk if she actually got the official go-ahead on this one#like. keeper's got his hands full anyway dealing with. yaknow. everything falling apart.#she can justify not getting his signature on every little thing if it's gonna cause him more hassle to make him sign off#so ask for forgiveness instead of permission when her brilliant plan works because surely it's going to work#watcher x makes her skin crawl but her cipher is Very Good#and he's the watcher she always dreamed of being#so it has to be the right call to pair them up. right?#sorry for writing a novel in the tags but you know it is with imperial agent replays
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mysillycomics · 4 months
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Hi everyone! This is Claire. I am writing to let you all know that we did it. We saved Bailey and Tiger Fluff, and we all live together in an apartment in Illinois, my home state. We really, really did it!!!
You can read our thanks, thoughts, and more under the read more :0)
(note: Oliver also goes by Bailey! She has two names.)
There are many important people on this journey that we would like to specifically thank.
First, all of our friends (especially Peregrine, Sophie, and Jackson) who were there on the day Bailey was evicted, who listened to me and helped me figure out what to do when I felt more lost than I’ve ever been. Without them we wouldn’t have been able to act so quickly and efficiently. Because of them, we were able to formulate a plan.
Speaking of Jackson, he and his partner Cherri need to be thanked once again. Jackson drove all the way from his home, Bailey’s motel, and back to get both her and Tiger to a place to stay while we figured out what to do next. They provided a warm, quiet, and safe place for both of them in a time when something like that was so far away. For the first time in a long time, I knew that Bailey was truly somewhere safe. For that, we will be forever grateful.
While we do not have their names, we would like to thank the staff of the airport and airline who helped make this journey objectively possible. They also made Tiger into a little celebrity on the flight, and everyone, including the pilot, went to greet her and congratulate her for being so brave. She really is the bravest little kitty we know.
Next are my very close friends Elle and Callan, who invited Bailey and Tiger to stay at their house not far from mine while we secured a place of our own. They, like Jackson and Cherri, gave both of them the space to simply be. I was able to visit a couple of times, and being with my favorite people made an extremely difficult time so much better. It made me think “this feeling is what we are fighting for”.
Finally, we’d like to thank you.
To all of you who read and shared our story, you helped us to feel seen and heard and not alone. Reading words of support in the comments, quote retweets, and tumblr tags truly made me feel like we could do this with everyone cheering us on.
To everyone who donated, your generosity this financially possible. As of writing, we received $19,381 from the GoFundMe. We are now able to use the rest of funds that have been tucked away in savings for rent, food, and bills. I cannot overstate how grateful we both are. What you did for us will never leave our hearts.
While Bailey and Fluffy were at Elle and Callan’s, we found an apartment. It was small, but perfect. We toured. We applied. And we got it.
And on December 9th, 2023, we moved in and started living together! Our goal, our dream, our driving force for so long was achieved. After three years of long distance, we finally made it.
Our home is small, and has some quirks as all homes do, but it’s ours. The love of my life, the best little cat in the word, and I are all together. We are safe, warm, happy, and loved. The future we fought so hard for us now the present. Forgive me for being long-winded. I just have so much to say about all of this! Sometimes I still can’t believe that we actually did it. But we did, we really did!!!
I’m going to keep the GoFundMe up for a little bit, but once things settle more I will close donations.
Thank you!!!!!!!!! 🧸💕
____
Hey everyone Bailey here, I cannot overstate just how grateful I am to every single one of you and how thankful I am that this journey has been able to come into fruition. It was very scary being in that motel not having a plan or knowing what I was gonna do next while everything was crumbling around me. If it wasn't for Claire and our incredibly kind and caring friends I don't know what I'd do. They helped me press on and get through this with Fluff and we finally did.
Finally we're in a place that brings nothing but peace and comfort, my anxiety has dropped and I'm doing things I've never thought possible and building up strengths I never knew I had, I feel whole in a way that I've never felt before and I'm just, happy.
I am so grateful to have Claire, for years she's been so supportive and comforting and has brought this dream we've had into reality and every day I am so thankful to have her, she is the love of my life and my best friend. The life that her, myself and Fluff now share will forever be together and we can finally begin living. 💚💜
Thank you everyone, thank you to our friends who let Fluff and I into their lives to be able to be safe while we get our bearings, thank you to everyone who said such kind and wonderfully compassionate words, cheering us on as we go, every day I was looking at the community post I made on YT and it was just filled with people being so supportive, and thank you everyone who donated and got us into where we are. We could not have done it without all of you. 🐟 ❤️ 🐟 ❤️
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a-hazbin-reader · 3 months
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HII
Could you do some hcs of alastor with wife!reader who ABSO(LUTE)LY adores dogs? (alastor hates the dog with his entire life)
I mean...he kinda has a good reason not to be a dog person...
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😡
Alastor X Reader Headcanons
✅️Romantic
❌️Platonic
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TW: Alastor Vs Doggo 🐶 Cannibalism, Vox getting owned by dog
Description: ☝️⬆️
Look, Alastor loves you deeply and would do anything for you, absolutely anything
Except let you have a dog
Absolutely not, he won't have a dog running around in his hotel and creating problems
He can already see it
The dog using the hotel as it's personal bathroom, gnawing on his hooves and ruining all the furniture
Humping everything in sight!!
You can have anything else, you can have Niffty! She makes a good pet don't you think?
No
How about Husk? He's basically a cat
"Fuck you!"
You want a dog, you even have one picked out already
You what? When did you even have time to go look at dogs? He's been purposefully keeping you busy anytime you mention one
The bite marks all over your body are evidence of it
Totally doesn't believe you're actually bringing home a dog until you do, then he's spitting out his tea
"Y/N, darling, what is that?"
"A smoothie."
"You know what I mean."
"Oh this? Our new dog, isn't he cute?"
You can't have a dog in the hotel-
Charlie and everyone else already agreed to it, even Husk said yes just to piss off Alastor
So everyone is on your side and you'll have adequate help, Alastor won't hardly ever even notice the dog
Except he does notice the dog, like all the time
The damned beast is always trying to hop up next to him, only to be shoved off by Alastor
"No furry beasts on the furniture~ The hair is a nightmare to clean up. Disgusting really..."
Not Husk and Angel giving him dirty looks for that one
After a couple of unsuccessful attempts to sit next to him, it simply settles for resting by his feet
At least it makes a decent footrest
Or the dog is always hogging your attention, sitting in your lap, laying with you in bed, following you around
How is a man supposed to sleep with his wife when there's some mutt in his spot???
You've caught Alastor glaring at your dog a few times, especially when you're giving him scratches and pets
He wants to be the one to hog your lap and be pampered by you, maybe you could even try giving him a belly rub or two
It certainly looks appealing
Alastor at least thinks he can get time alone with you outside of the hotel but nope, you insist on taking the dog with you
"He needs the fresh air and exercise, Alastor!"
But your husband needs some alone time with you! He's not being dramatic!
Or he's trying to enjoy his breakfast?? Guess who's paws are on the table, begging and slobbering over the idea of a bite
"Absolutely not, you can just forget abou-HEY!"
Looks like his breakfast now belongs to the dog
You definitely make him another breakfast and apologize over and over again
Kiss him and sit in his lap, then maybe he'll consider forgiving you~
Sometimes, when you're sleeping, Alastor and the dog will be locked into a staring match
"I don't like you."
Whine
Rosie tries to sell him on the idea of just maybe liking this one dog, even she's taken a liking to him apparently
Traitor
You make Alastor promise that he won't ever get rid of the dog, OR EAT HIM, OR HURT HIM
And he can't break a promise he made to his darling wife
But he hates this fucking dog with a passion so when the dog suddenly gets out one day? He's perfectly content to let him run off
Until he realizes how upset you would be that your beloved pooch is gone and that gives him pause
Fffffffffuck
Not him spending all day trying to find a dog he doesn't even like, asking everyone if they've seen him
Nope, no, sorry no, ect
Just when Alastor has just about given up and started to contemplate trying to replace the mutt, he hears a familiar yell
"IS THIS DOG FUCKING PISSING ON ME!?"
Vox
Following the sound, Alastor is greeted with the sight of your dog running circles around Vox, who's standing in a puddle with wet pants
For some reason, the delightful mutt has taken to terrorizing him, biting at his limbs only to jump just out of reach of Vox's claws
Maybe it's something he's picked up from Alastor, you certainly didn't teach the dog that
The sight is too funny for Alastor, who doesn't even try to stop the dog, only laughing maniacally
Maybe this mutt isn't so bad
Later, when he comes home with the dog, you notice they seem much fonder of each other
Alastor goes and picks him out a fancy new leash, he starts giving him table scraps and he even invites the dog to be his footrest
Quit putting your feet on my dog
Stop giving the dog fingers!!
You catch him giving the pup a few scratches here and there, almost in an absent-minded manner
He starts calling the dog by his name instead of calling him beast, mutt, hound, monstrosity, ect
He even gives the dog his own room at the hotel with his own fluffy doggy bed
Okay, that last part might just be him wanting his marital bed back
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We love dogs in this house!!
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luveline · 4 months
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hey baby! happy christmas eve <3 i was wondering if we could get more shy!reader x spence, i know the people love bombshell (and i love her too!) but shy reader has such a special place in my heart :)
ty for requesting!! ♡ fem
The universe puts Spencer Reid so close to you and so often as a punishment for something. You thought you were getting a great gig, selected for the BAU younger than most, surrounded by the top agents in the field, top agents willing to forgive your inexperience just as long as you don't impede the flow. 
Well, you're impeding things. Badly. 
“What are you doing?” Emily asks. “You're not listening to a word I'm saying. I need your help on this.”
Her tone is kinder than her unimpressed stare. “Right. Right, sorry, I'm distracted.” 
“You think?” She frowns. “What's with you?” 
Spencer crouches just outside of your eyeline by the door. The police precinct the BAU dominates today is small and underfunded, leaving Spencer to map his geographical profile on the floor. This is fine, but the precinct is in Texas, where the weather is sweltering, and the way to survive is to strip. He wears a simple blue-white button up without a tie, his sleeves bunched above his elbows, and his hair clings to the damp back of his neck. 
“Nothing. Sorry.” 
Emily hums unhappily. You can't blame her for not believing you. 
You throw yourself back into your work, bouncing theories and details off of each other with Spencer's ear skewed your way. It's harder to talk while he's listening. Worse when Morgan arrives with lunch and insists that Spencer sit beside you so he can hog the vent above. 
“Did they have your diet coke?” Spencer asks. 
You gesture to your cup clumsily. Spencer opens the bag on the table to pull out your polystyrene boxes. He knows without asking what food you've ordered and places it neatly in front of you, passing you a plastic knife and fork before he so much as glances at his own meal. He's sickeningly thoughtful. 
“You okay?” he asks. “You're being really quiet today. Quieter than usual.” 
“I'm fine.” 
“Yeah? You sure?” 
You nod with a tight smile. You're worried if he keeps looking at you that you might burst into flames. 
Spencer puts his hand on your arm and squeezes. The warmth of his palm pressed to the flank of your arm, the gentle pressure, the pat before he pulls back. Your brain melts in your skull and the rest of the team arrive just in time to watch. 
“You look like you've seen a ghost,” JJ says, dropping her jacket on the table. Hotch gives you a concerned squint. 
“I'm fine.” 
“She keeps saying she's fine,” Spencer says, hand on your shoulder now, the lightest of touches. 
“But you're not really fine,” Rossi says, sitting across from you with a knowing look. He always looks like he knows everything. "What's wrong, bella?"
“I'm fine, I'm–” Spencer's touch becomes more insistent on yout shoulder, heat rushes to your face and chest, and suddenly you've lost sight of what you're doing, where your hands are, and you've knocked your soda over in a rush of ice. 
Spencer grabs it before it can tip entirely. Emily throws napkins at the mess. Your hands come up to your face suddenly, embarrassed, but the team laugh and hum their sympathies. 
“I got it,” Emily says. 
“Maybe you should try drinking some of that,” Morgan teases. 
“I'm really sorry, I don't know what's wrong with me today.” 
“Well, don't get stressed about it. Just take a minute,” Hotch says. “Is that mine?” 
Spencer closes in, hand flat on your shoulder, inching down to the small of your back. He stops somewhere on your spine, his every touch like a bruise. He can't not know how nerve wracking it is to be near him, but of course he doesn't. He wouldn't put you through this if he did. 
“Your food's gonna get cold,” he says. 
You rub your eyes and promptly put your hands in your lap. “Yeah. Sorry about that. I just had a hot flush, I think.” 
“Loverboy's not getting to you, is he? Just ignore him,” Morgan says. 
“I'd prefer if you didn't ignore me,” Spencer says quietly, charmingly. 
“Reid, eat.” Hotch meets your eyes. In a room of profilers, he's the best. He's the shark. He probably knew how Reid made you feel before you did, and he's the boss, so he redirects his attention. “Y/N, you're alright?” You nod. “Then let's eat and talk about what we know so far.” 
You give up half way through your meal when Spencer's knee rests against yours and you can physically feel your heart at the contiguity. 
“Are you sure you're okay?” he asks you softly. 
His deodorant smells like mint. “I promise, I'm fine. I think it's just too hot.” 
He makes you a fan with a menu from the takeout and fans you with it. It works at first, but his smile prolongs your agony and it eventually prompts an adverse effect. 
Hotch has to send Spencer out to canvas with Rossi to get you to function again. 
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deanwinchestergf · 6 months
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and why would an angel rescue me from hell? good things do happen dean. not in my experience. i'm not here to perch on your shoulder. i was getting too close to the humans in my charge. you. to everything there is a season. you made an exception for me. you're different. for what's worth, i would give anything not to have you do this. i learned my lesson while i was away, dean. i serve heaven, i don't serve men and i certainly don't serve you. but you guys aren't supposed to be there, you're not in this story. yeah, well, we're making it up as we go. i'm hunted, i rebelled and i did it all, all of it, for you. so what i'm thelma and you're louise and we're just gonna hold hands and sail off this cliff together? i need your help because you're the only one who'll help me. that's a pretty nice timing, cas. we had an appointment. what happened to you cas? you used to be human, or at least like one. but cas, you'll call right? if you get into real trouble? this is cas, guys. he has gone to the mat cut and bleeding for us so many freaking times, don't we owe him the benefit of the doubt at least? it sounds so simple when you say it like that, where were you when i needed to hear it? i was there, where were you? i'm doing this for you, dean. i'm doing this because of you. but we were family once, i would've died for you, i almost did a few times. i've lost lisa, i've lost ben and now i've lost sam. don't make me lose you too. cas, you child, why didn't you listen to me. you used to fight together, bestest of friends, actually. if you remember, then you know you did the best you could at the time. the very touch of you corrupts. when castiel first laid a hand on you in hell he was lost. i'd rather have you, cursed or not. well, i'll go with you. i prayed to you cas, every night. cas, we're getting out of here, we're going home. i mean you kept saying you didn't think it would work, did you not trust me? cas, it's me. we need you, i need you. i won't hurt dean. cause you didn't trust me? you didn't trust me. please, man, i need you here. nobody wants him here more than i do. you gave us an order, castiel, and we gave you our trust. don't lose it over one man. you really believe we three will be enough? we always have been. his true weakness is revealed. you draped yourself with the flag of heaven but ultimately, it was all about saving one human. i'm glad you're here, man. how are you, dean? and then you'll kill the angel, castiel. now that one, that i suspect would hurt something awful. and when you turn, everyone you know, everyone you love, they could be long dead. everyone except me. i'm not gonna send lucifer into battle inside cas, what if he doesn't make it? it's not an it, sam. it's cas. but you're always there, you know? i could go with you. you mean too much to me, to everything. i'm gonna cure you of your human weakness, same way i cured my own. it's a gift, you keep those. you mean we? yes, dumbass, we. we lost everything and now you're gonna bring him back. we got cas back, that's a pretty damn big win. just don't get dead again. it's good to hear your voice. so this is goodbye? but i swear if he did something to her, if she's- then you're dead to me. either get on board or walk away. i don't know what's god and what isn't, and it's driving me crazy. dean, you asked what about all of this is real. we are. you used trust me, give me the benefit of the doubt, now you can barely look at me. i think it's time for me to move on. you didn't deserve that. since when do we get what we deserve? maybe if you didn't just up and leave us. i left but you didn't stop me. i should've stopped you. you're my best friend but i just let you go. and i forgive you, of course i forgive you. i'm sorry it took me so long, i'm sorry it took me til now to say it. you did it cas. okay, cas, i need to say something. you don't have to say it, i heard your prayer. well, here's to being right. you know what every other version of you did after gripping him tight and raising him from perdition? they did what they were told, but not you.
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samiiy20 · 30 days
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⋆˙ 𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒆𝒔 ⋆˙
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𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Choi San x fem!reader 𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: Your best friend helps you get through a breakup, but your feelings become intertwined as you spend time together. 𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐞: Angust, smut and fluff 𝐀𝐔/𝐓𝐨𝐩𝐞: Best friends to lovers 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 4.2k 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: Infidelity (not the reader's), fingering, tasting semen, unprotected sex (don't do it)
N/A: This is my attempt at writing some romance (sort of) so I'm sorry if it's not very good, but I wanted to try.
Masterlist II tag list
This content NOT is for minors!!!
This is merely entertainment, this does not represent any real person.
It is forbidden to copy or translate my work.
When you came home after a long day at work, what you least expected to find was your fiancé with someone else. At first you thought it was your tired eyes, but when you heard the moans echo in your ears you knew it wasn't a dream.
After your heart broke into a thousand pieces, you threw the first thing you could reach, to try to come back from the trance. They realized your presence too late, your fiancé's color drained from her face and the other girl simply covered herself with the first thing she would find.
"Love…"
“Don't call me that” your voice trembled and despite the tears gathering in your eyes you weren't going to hesitate to do what you had to.
"I…"
“I don't care” the other girl had taken the things from her and she left the room in fear when she walked past you. You wedged your nails into your palms and gritted your teeth so as not to run out and stamp her face “go with her.”
"But…"
“I warned you,” your fiance got down on his knees and grabbed you by the waist, hugging you, but even though the tears couldn't stop you remained firm, “the only thing you knew I wouldn't forgive you… And you did it… I… . I…"
“Love, it was a mistake… I didn't want to.”
“The only mistake here is you” the emotions were mixing and anger took control for a moment “I won't tell you again. Go with her or I’ll call someone to get you out of here.”
"But…"
"Get out of my home!!!"
Your fiance started to cry but he knew what you were capable of, so he took his clothes and left, but before closing the door you heard his last words.
"I still love you. “
When you were finally alone you let your emotions out, the tears did not let you see and the pain in your chest made you fall to your knees, but the anger was felt in the blood that fell from your hands through your nails. You stayed on the ground trying to assimilate what just happened.
All the moments you spent with him came back into your head only to haunt you, you felt short of breath when you felt the weight of the ring on your finger. You ripped it off and threw it away from you, remembering the promise that had just been broken. That night you couldn't move from where you were and crying filled the room, leaving you immersed in your pain.
***
San noticed your desk empty again. Your missed calls got on his nerves and his unanswered messages made him nervous. Nobody in the office knew what was wrong with you, the boss said you were sick, but he didn't believe it.
When he left work he ran as fast as his legs could carry him to your house. When he saw your house number he was happy and before knocking he took a breath to recover from the marathon. One, two, three, four times were not enough for you to open.
He didn't want to go in on his own, but he was really worried and knowing where you were hiding the key guided him to open the door. He was surprised to notice the dark interior and with each step he took the fear in his chest only grew more until he heard something in the distance.
San tripped over something in the dark but he didn't want to turn on the lights for fear of being discovered. When he arrived at your room a cry was present and he knew immediately that it was you. Without thinking much he turned on the light and he was scared when he saw the state of the room.
Everything was a mess. Clothes and things on the floor, torn papers and you in a ball between the blankets. You turned around only to see your best friend at the door with a thousand and one questions in his eyes, you turned around again, covering your face with the covers.
"Do not look at me"
“But…” San slowly approached where you were and sat on the edge of the bed, revealing your swollen, red face and dark circles adorning your eyes. “What happened here?”
You opened your mouth to say something but only a whimper came out and again the uncontrollable tears accompanying your pain. San took you in his arms and you let his warmth envelop you, cling to his clean shirt and get dirty with your tears.
San stayed with you until you calmed down, he didn't pressure you to say anything, but he could guess what happened because of the absence of 'someone' Hours passed in your friend's arms, sobbing and trying to calm down while he stroked your hair. With a lot of effort you managed to tell him what happened and when you finished he just hugged you tighter and snuggled up next to you.
“Everything is fine, I'm here”
***
When you opened your eyes, your tired body did not react to the arms that surrounded you, you only clung closer to his chest, inhaling his scent. Infinitely grateful to have someone like San by your side, he had become your friend in a short time but you were very confident, as if you had known each other for longer. When you broke down you thought about calling him, but you were so hurt you couldn't even move.
San stayed by your side all the time and he even missed work just to take care of you, you didn't understand why he worried so much, but he had his reasons. Your whole life was summed up to San cleaning, San cooking, San bathing you, San, San, San. But despite your friend's good actions, your mind did not forget.
"Come on, get up."
“I don't want to” you tried hard to hold on to the bed but obviously you couldn't. San picked you up easily in his arms and dragged you to the living room “I don't want to go out.”
“You have to do it, it's for your own good” you knew you were going to lose against him, but you still held on to the door frame in vain “the sun will be good for you and you have to get another job.”
He had a point. You couldn't stay home forever no matter how much money you had saved up, but the thought of leaving after weeks in the comfort of your home terrified you, especially because you thought that anyone who saw you would realize what happened.
"But…"
“If you don't let go, I swear I will tie your arms and drag you through the city.”
His voice was different from how he spoke to you when he comforted you at night, so sighing and with a lot of effort you tried to accept it.
The streets were wet from the rain, but a few rays of sun fought against the clouds to see the city. You didn't want to admit it but breathing fresh air helped you a little to force your body to do something, you felt a little better, so much so that you invited San to eat.
"You look better"
You looked him in the eyes and reached out your hands to take his. If it weren't for him maybe you would have rotted in your own house, but now you felt that not everything was so bad, especially next to him.
“I don't know how to thank you for everything you've done for me.”
San raised a hand and caressed your cheek, ignoring how warm his chest felt when you smiled.
“Just keep going.”
A lump formed in your throat, but it was different. It was no longer for a man, but for you. You had neglected yourself so much that you were on the verge of collapse, you no longer wanted to remain stagnant, it was time to move forward, you had to find a way to move on with your life, this was just a bad move.
You nodded, trying not to shed tears and making yourself a promise. You would move on.
***
The months passed and everything seemed to get better, you got rid of all your ex-fiancé's things, you no longer cried every night, you could get out of bed on your own and you even got a job. All with the help of San.
When San felt that he had finished his work he decided that it was time to return to his own apartment, but the idea of leaving you alone terrified him a little, although you didn't want him to leave either, so with fear you proposed that you live together. San was very surprised and thought that he was listening wrong, but when he saw that you weren't smiling he became serious.
"Are you sure?"
"San… You've practically been living here for more than three months, plus we're best friends, it wouldn't be so strange after all" something on his face seemed to change and you worried a little "but of course if you don't want to…"
"Yes, I want"
They both smiled hiding their true thoughts. You would never admit that you got used to seeing him walk barefoot in the mornings or his sweet voice at night or his strong arms when you relapsed. You didn't want to find out why the idea of leaving him weighed so much on you, even though deep in your heart you knew the truth.
***
"Are you ready?" San nodded, leaning his head on the couch. You delicately placed the mask over his face and held back a laugh when you saw how it looked on him.
“Don't laugh, you should try it, it's relaxing”
"Sure, Mr. Ghost."
San opened his eyes when he heard your laughter walk away to the kitchen and held back a sigh. He couldn't take it anymore. He had been in love with you for years and this whole situation since you broke up with your idiot ex didn't help him at all, least of all the fact of living together, but he had to put up with it if he didn't want to lose you. He didn't want to say a word because he didn't think you were ready to love anyone else after what happened to you.
He had been really angry, how could someone do that to you? He never liked the jerk, so he had the perfect opportunity to beat him up when he ran into him outside the office one day and even though you never came in he was content with leaving him on the floor. Furthermore, it was a little calming for him to see how you were getting better, although he felt that his situation was getting worse as the days went by. It was increasingly difficult for him to be close to you without wanting to admire every part of your body, it was difficult for him to fight his impulses to kiss you every time he saw you smile and it was difficult to hide the reactions in his body when his hands touched or you gave him a touch. hug.
He closed his eyes again and focused on something else, but the aroma of your perfume around him intoxicated him so much that he couldn't control his body. As soon as he heard your footsteps he grabbed anything within reach and placed it on his lap to hide the problem that had started to form in his pants.
“You can't take over the popcorn,” you said, grabbing a fist. San tensed for a moment, holding the bowl tightly in his lap and tried to avoid your gaze as you turned on the television. It took a while before he managed to relax a little but a small discomfort still invaded his crotch.
Everything happened normally, small jokes between the actors' decisions, laughter involved, complaints on your part about something, but neither of you expected the phone to ring.
“I'll answer,” San said, getting up before you. When he got to the phone on the wall he noticed an unregistered number “Hello?”
"Who are you? Where is she?" San froze when he recognized that voice, he looked at where you were and it seemed like you didn't care, but he knew you could hear clearly, so he lowered his voice.
“She is not there”
“Don't lie, I know she's there” with every word your ex said her blood grew hotter, but she had to maintain her composure, she didn't want to alarm you “pass it to me or…”
"What will you do?"
“I will go to where you are and break your face.”
“Try it, last time you were the one who ended up on the ground.” San felt how all his accumulated anger was coming out little by little.
“You, why are you with her? Are you trying to take it away from me? She is mine” San gritted his teeth without taking his eyes off you, he felt her blood boiling but when he was about to hang up he heard something else “she will always be mine. Do you think that a few months by your side can erase what we had? Hahaha don't make me laugh, did you think she would fall in love with you if you were there for her? Hahaha you are an idiot”
“You don't deserve it”
“It maybe, but she will always choose me and I will prove it to you…” San stopped halfway when you snatched the phone from him.
“Stop it,” you put the phone in its place and sighed, “it's not worth it.”
“Did you know it was him?” you didn't look at it and pressed the appropriate buttons to lock it.
“I don't know how he got the number again.”
"Again?" San was angry and you could tell without seeing him, but you didn't dare find out. “Since when has this been happening?” Your silence only showed what I already assumed and I raised my voice without wanting to “tell me.”
“All the time,” you responded, raising your voice back, taking out your frustration, “he always finds a way to get the number and calls, but I never answer.”
"But…"
“Stop worrying, I'm fine” your tone came out a little harsher than you thought, but you let out everything you were thinking “I don't need you to take care of me so much” San was about to speak but you continued “yes, I know what he did, and that is why I will never forgive him, no matter what he does, I will never doubt my decisions San, I am an adult.”
San let out a exhausted sigh and took you in his arms without saying anything. You tried to walk away but in the end you gave up when one of his hands began to caress your head.
“Sorry for doubting you” you raised your head to meet his eyes and noticed that there was something behind them. The words pooled in her throat, but you bit your lip. “I don’t want anything bad to happen to you.”
You wrapped your hands around her waist and hid your head in her chest. That comforting feeling in your chest made you shiver and you hugged him tighter without thinking.
“Nothing can happen to me if you are with me”
San felt as if the barrier he had put up had just broken, there was nothing he could do to stop it. He took your face in his hands and opened his mouth to say what was tormenting him, but he couldn't, his lips trembled. He was so afraid that he couldn't move.
Your feelings ran through your entire body and you felt your heart hammering in your chest, but you still held his face and pressed your forehead to his without stopping to look at him. There were so many things to say, but neither of them knew how to do it, not after the pain, the secrets, and the moments they had shared over the past few months.
His lips met without much resistance and at first you thought it was a mistake when you didn't get a response. San was just trying to process it, he had dreamed about this moment so much that he thought maybe it was another one of his fantasies, but when your hands grabbed his hair he reacted and he started to move his lips slowly.
It was a kiss loaded with all his feelings kept from him, it was slow like the love that consumed him, soft and delicate like his trembling hands on your back.
He let out a sigh that released all the burden from his shoulders, everything he had hidden finally came to light. You clung to his mouth until you lost your breath. You pulled away from him to look into his eyes and discover all the secrets he couldn't tell while you waited for him to see yours.
They stayed for a long moment looking through his soul, they didn't need to say anything, they both knew it, they felt it deep in his heart. His bodies were getting closer again and they didn't stop when his lips collided again, releasing all the desire contained in the back of your mind.
You couldn't think of anything but San's tongue playing with yours, his soft moans muffled in his throat. San separated for a moment to admire your face, without saying a word you understood what his dark eyes wanted. To you.
You pulled him towards you again but this time his mouth was more desperate, his hands squeezed the skin on your waist and you held back a moan. You walked backwards, taking him with you until you collided with the edge of the table. San took advantage and grabbed your legs, pulling you up onto the wood. His kisses moved down your chin to your neck and he lightly sucked on your skin making you let out a moan.
Your hands ran down his chest until they reached one of the buttons on his shirt and you began to unbutton them, leaving him bare to appreciate his chest. You held back a sigh and saw him smile as he grabbed your legs, caressing your thighs, you moaned a little when his hips collided and you noticed a bulge.
You both looked into each other's eyes as you moved your hips a few times, you breathed the same breath and you threw your head back as you felt the arousal building in your belly.
“San…” you grabbed his face and approached his lips slowly. The words tickled your tongue, but you still weren't sure you wanted to hear them.
“I think I love you” San answered for you and you opened your eyes suddenly.
You noticed the tears in your eyes and kissed him before he saw that you had shed a tear. He knew it, he felt it in his veins, he knew that you also felt the same, he didn't need words.
You moaned a little when his mouth left a path of soft kisses to the neckline of your shirt and a shiver ran through your body when his hands slid under the fabric to knead your breasts.
He took off the shirt you were wearing and held back a sigh to see your breasts in the air. He covered your nipple with his mouth, feeling your fingers in his hair. You closed your eyes, enjoying the feeling of his tongue making circles and his teeth sinking into your delicate skin.
His hands were not far behind and slowly moved down your legs where he gently squeezed your thighs and approached your core. You arched your back as you felt his fingers play with the thin fabric of your shorts. You stretched the strands of his hair without realizing it when he ran his fingers over your clothed clit, you moaned his name, closing your eyes at the sensation.
“Say it again,” he asked, raising his blushing face and half-closed eyes. You bit your lips and recorded his face in your memory. San moved his fingers through your pussy and you moaned involuntarily.
“Sa… San”
You held on to his shoulders as he moved your clothes and touched your core directly, massaging your clit in circles as he kissed your neck. Her fingers moved all over your pussy until they reached your entrance and you sighed again as you felt one of her fingers enter your tight hole.
San moves his hand to take out and sink his finger in again, he doesn't take his eyes off your pretty face even for a moment and begins to move faster as he sees how your mouth opens to blurt out his name.
You rest your elbows on the table and throw your head back as you feel a second finger enter, your body is eager and trembling, San's fingers make you feel so full and they hit a sweet spot when he curves them that makes you see stars.
“Don't stop…” you manage to say between moans and you close your eyes tightly when he follows your instructions, your legs tremble and you fight to keep them open, but you release the knot in your belly without being able to stop it.
San's hands grip your waist and he pulls you into his mouth. You still feel his fingers inside you and you moan when he takes them out. You watch as he opens his mouth and licks his fingers, testing himself on them and you can't help but blush when you see that image of him.
“You taste exquisite, princess.”
Before you can say anything, take your legs, wrap your legs around his body and hold on to his shoulders while he takes you to the room, you leave small kisses along his neck and you hear him sigh.
He gently laid you on the bed and you watched him take off his clothes, trying to control the urge to run your hands all over his body. He leaned towards you and joined your lips in a delicate kiss. There was no rush, San wanted to admire every part of you, he wanted to keep this moment in his memory forever.
He shifted a little and you sighed as you felt his cock pass through your wet pussy. You both looked into each other's eyes, there was a question in them and you just nodded knowing what was to come. Your body tensed as you felt his cock enter you and he kissed your cheeks.
“Relax” you inhaled air and relaxed your body feeling how little by little it filled you “you did well princess.”
He dried your tears and kissed your forehead, containing the urge to start moving. He looked into your eyes and sighed. The love he felt for you had consumed him completely for a long time, but now that you were with him he couldn't believe it. He caressed your face and kissed your lips to realize that it was not a dream.
“I love you so much,” he gave a little push and you sighed without taking your eyes off his. He moved his hips again, starting to set a slow but deep rhythm.
You wrapped your hands around his body behind his back and wrapped your legs around his waist. There was no distance between his bodies and yet you clung to him without wanting to let go. You marked his back with your nails when he touched a sensitive spot inside you and San kissed your shoulders, leaving small marks of his teeth on your skin.
Everything felt so different from what you were used to, everything around you stopped mattering and you could only focus on the man looking into your soul. They were connected beyond the union of his bodies, you could see all his secrets in his eyes and you felt his love in his gaze.
“I love you,” you said for the first time in a long time without fear. San stopped for a moment and took your hand, intertwining his fingers.
"Say it again"
“I love you” you repeated.
San's body shook, he was close to him, but he didn't stop moving his hips to the rhythm that you said over and over again: "I love you."
You both moaned as you felt San's release. His body collapsed on top of yours and you sighed, caressing his head. They stayed together for a long time until he moved away from you.
They settled between the sheets and hugged each other for a long time without saying anything. Your whole head was spinning, you were tangled in his arms and you could hear his heartbeat.
“Promise me you won't leave” San moved a little to see you and became serious.
“I promise you I won't leave.”
"Never?"
“Never” You didn't know why his words comforted you and you smiled, hugging him again "I love you."
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-> @cultofdionysusnet
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dalliancekay · 1 month
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Aziraphale does NOT need to suffer MORE
Can't believe I have to say this. TW: grief, mourning, death (sorry) I have, since falling into the fandom 6 months ago to escape real life, seen many takes on how Aziraphale needs to suffer in S3 to match Crowley's suffering. Mainly as the counterpart to the moment Crowley thinks he lost Aziraphale as he's looking for him desperately in the burning bookshop.
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Then drinks, we suppose, to dull his pain, waiting for the Armageddon. Also, the way Crowley suffers at the bandstand argument, the 'I Forgive You' moments, which many people find utterly devastating and incredibly heartless from Aziraphale. Not to mention when he doesn't react in the 'right way' to Crowley's confession in the Final 15. And then on top of that, 'abandons' Crowley. Oh and also for, and I quote: "The smug and entitled way Aziraphale went around in S2 assuming Crowley would love and follow him everywhere." And for all this pain that Crowley endured for him, Aziraphale should suffer in S3, to I assume, even out the scores. Some people want to see him lose it, show his emotions, to cry or beg or otherwise show how much he misses Crowley and how very sorry he is for what he's done.
Now for the TW grief content I motioned above. You can skip to the next sentence in bold.
WE ALL SUFFER DIFFERENTLY I was on holiday late September last year, visiting my mum, stepfather and my two younger brothers. We went to a cousin's wedding. It was great. The day after, as I was hanging out reading a book my mum got a call. The kind of call every mother fears. My youngest brother (he was 27) died in an accident. We needed to speak to police and the coroner. She cried and cried. She's still crying. She asks questions. She gets no answers. I did not cry. I talked to the police. I googled a funeral home. I bought my brother his last set of clothes. He lived in a hoodie and torn black jeans. Mum wanted a suit. But he died in the one he bought for the wedding. I texted a lot of people. I bought snacks for the many friends who came to the funeral and wanted to speak to us after. My grief feels like a vice. I am not sad. I do not appear sad. Contrary to what people expect. But I am ANGRY. I am furious. But nobody can see this. I am not fine and I wish no one would ever* ask how I was again. TW/Personal content over. Since I was small (because I am weird like that) I genuinely wondered if, finding myself in danger, I could scream like people in films do. I don't think I could. I cope with hard situations, fear and stress and anxiety by shutting down, sometimes by retreating too, by furiously trying to find a way out. And I think Aziraphale does the same. And that's why I love him so much. And why I feel get him and understand that people sometimes can't tell how much he's actually feeling. I also express love the way Aziraphale does - by organising things for people I love, inviting them places, making plans. When Crowley said you call me for three things (and it's basically any old reason) I felt SO SEEN. This is what I would do with a friend who I know is feeling unmoored, sad, stuck. I'd text them with any old thing. I'd never actually say I love you, how can I help though, I would try to get them to talk, meet me, go somewhere. Aziraphale does not express emotions the same way as Crowley.
But his emotions are valid nonetheless. He is worried for Crowley from around 3 minutes into their acquaintanceship. And he NEVER stops worrying.
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And are we quite sure he has never lost Crowley?
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How many times did Aziraphale's heart freeze in horror when he realised Hell has taken Crowley and he had no idea if he'll ever come back and what is happening to him?
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Why else would he be so worried about working on the Arrangement? Was he worried just for himself? Do we really think that?
Crowley thinks he lost Aziraphale, yes, we saw that, but do they ever talk about what happened to the angel then? Do we?
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That he got blown into atoms which I bet wasn't pleasant and when he arrives in Heaven he limps? Why is he hurt? Why is he quickly pretending he isn't? Why is he always hiding how he feels? Also, he immediately deserts, wants no part in the Holy War and quickly finds an extremely unconventional way to get back. It's not a grand gesture, there's no pomp around it, he thinks this and then does it. No hesitation.
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Is this coming from an angel who just can't leave Heaven behind and longs to be a part of it? Who loves to follow rules? And let's not forget in those moments Aziraphale thought Crowley was gone. That he very likely left for Alpha Centauri. Last he heard from him he was told he was talking to an old friend and had no time for him. Why we NEVER talk about how that might have felt for Aziraphale?
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Things are not as simple as Aziraphale has been supressing his emotions and lying to himself about how he feels and he should get over it and become free. That's not how this works. His trauma and his personality are deeply intertwined and he'd never be the kind of person who is open in showing their grief or stress. He will learn to be more open, with his love especially, we see him reaching for and touching his demon in S2. Openly being with him, looking at him without guarding himself. That's HUGE. He's trying. So. Just because Aziraphale is not crying and screaming and I dunno, tearing his hair out or whatever some people would have him do, does not mean he isn't overflowing with pain, fear, uncertainty, doubts, worries, and so much anxiety that if he let it all out, half of the solar system would turn to ashes.
Aziraphale does not need to suffer in S3 to level out Crowley's suffering. They are, unfortunately, equal in their pain as they are in love. If there is one thing Crowley would never abide, it'd be this take from the fandom. * A note on grief (obviously from my personal experience) As initiated by @anthony-crowleys-left-nut in a comment
It's not that I mind to know people care and worry etc, but asking how I am can only end in me lying (fine, thank you) and both of us knowing it's not really true and feeling awkward or not lying (I feel like shit, mostly cos I can't sleep and think the world is a stupid unfair place) and both of us feeling awkward anyway. Does that make sense? I wish I could tell friends/colleagues to ask what I've been up to or something similar instead. What I've been reading (um, AO3, but I'll make something up), watching, do I want to go see some spring flowers bloom (I do).
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punching-pentagrams · 2 months
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Love in a Hopeless Place
Chapter 11
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Chapter 1|Chapter 2|Chapter 3|Chapter 4|Chapter 5|Chapter 6|Chapter 7|Chapter 8|Chapter 9|Chapter 10|Chapter 11|Chapter 12 (FINAL CHAPTER)
Lucifer x prostitute fem!reader Word Count: 5.8k CW: Slowburn, Angst, Prostitution, Hurt/comfort, trauma, fluff, depression, anxiety, insecurity, sexual tension, kissing, light teasing smut
Lucifer laid up in his bed the room up in the apple shaped penthouse that was made just for him at the upper left side of the hotel. He had made this room thinking he was be here more often, and then he stopped coming. The last few weeks may had been more tolerable if he had been here... Oh well, too late for that. Now he laid there thinking of the things the hotel people had said about you and him. Could there really be a way of fixing this?
Lucifer sighed, he was really trying not to get his hopes up. He wanted to be able to get a chance to fix things with you, pick things back up with you, if you would let him, he was willing to do practically anything to make things right with you. He'd fight 100 Adams and Alastors at the same time just for the chance to hold you again. But all he could do was lay there, in his bed, wondering if Charlie and Angel were talking to you. Would you be mad? Would you give him a chance to talk to you again? Would the report back from this exchange be the last he ever hears about you?
After what felt like hours, he heard a knock on the door.
"Who is it?" Lucifer called out.
"Dad, it's me! Can I come in?" Charlie called from the other side of the door, Angel next to her and you a few steps back.
Your heart was racing, and hearing his voice on the other side of the door made it so much worse.
"Ya!" Lucifer yelled back, still staring at the ceiling. Charlie entered his room followed by Angel, you stayed outside of the door just out of view. "How did it go? Is she ok? Was she mad?" Lucifer asked Charlie and Angel, the pain laced in his voice was apparent. It broke your heart to hear it, but it made you feel less anxious to hear him prioritize concern for you. Care... as always.
"It went well, Dad, so well in fact... that we have someone here to see you," Charlie said, turning to the doorway.
Lucifer froze as he heard another pair of footsteps enter the room. He slowly sat up to meet your gaze, those beautiful (e/c) eyes, so full of their same gentleness and care, but also indescribable pain.
"(y/n)", he whispered, as if we was afraid that saying you name too loud might make you disappear.
You smiled, "Hi Lucifer," you said softly in return, his name sounded like music dripping from your lips. No malice, no anger, something... soft and beautiful, like you had been holding your breath for years and in saying his name you finally felt like you could exhale.
All you could do was stare at each other and take each other in. Charlie and Angel smiled at each other, then looked at you both as they started to back up.
"We'll just... give you too some space to talk," Charlie said, and then closed the door behind her and Angel. They pumped their fists with a quiet "Yes!" before running downstairs to tell the rest of the hotel crew what was going on.
You and Lucifer were now alone.
The air was tease and silent, neither of you knowing who should speak or make the first move.
At the moment you started to open your mouth, Lucifer moved to slip off the bed and onto his knees on the floor, hands on the ground in front of him and forehead pressed against his hands... bowing to you?!
"(y/n), darling... I... I'm sorry, I'm so... so sorry... Please... please believe when I say I don't remember what happened that night. I was drunk, I was nervous... I- I can't forgive myself for whatever I could hav-", Lucifer rambled as he started to shake as he kept his deep bow on the floor.
"Lucifer..." you say softly cutting him off, he jumped up a little, your voice suddenly being much closer than her expected. He looked up to see you on your knees in from of him, tears also starting to well in your eyes.
"You didn't hurt me that night," you said, tears starting to fall.
"I- I didn't?" he said through tears.
"No!" you cried, "I thought I had mad you mad and that's why you didn't call for me."
Lucifer's eyes went wide, "What?! No, of course not! I was so scared, I couldn't remember what happened that night and then I got a call from the Lounge that you were calling our appointments and I was banned from seeing you!"
"No! No, Lucifer I never banned you. You never hurt me, I- got scared, I was worried, you weren't acting like yourself, you were so drunk... you told me something... and I... I- I didn't know what to do... so I just ran! I ran and I disappeared for a little to figure things out. I came back and I waited, I waited and their was nothing! I thought you hated me and were done with me!"
"No! Never, never! Hells, Duckie, I've been a mess without you! I need you!" Lucifer cried. You and Lucifer were both a mess of hysterical tears at this point, and you collapsed into an embrace as you cried, reassuring each other through heavy sobs that you were not mad or upset at the other. It was a deep cry that you had both deeply needed in the arms of the other.
After several minutes, both of you started to calm down, tears still falling but now they were able to talk without heaving as hard through their sobs.
"So... what happened, exactly? Tell me your side of it all, please..." Lucifer finally choked out. You took a few more deep breaths before starting.
"You... you showed up at my apartment... you were drunk, stumbling, had a hard time teleporting. You were sweet but very touchy, you got more drunk and touchy as the night went on. I thought you were having a really bad day, then I thought you were nervous about may wanting to try being intimate again. But then... you told me something... something I didn't know how to respond to... I was scared about responding to it the wrong way, especially because you are the King and I am just a prostitute... I didn't know if you actually cared about me, even though it always felt like you really did, and the power dynamic was just so... confusing... so I pushed you away. I ran, I disappeared on a trip for a few days to think about things, to give us space in case... well, in case I had upset you... You were supposed to be told I was just on vacation for a few days... but it sounds like you were told something else... something to split us apart," you explained, looking down at Lucifer who was snuggled back into his old position in your lap. Lucifer nodded as he listened to your explanation. "I came back, and I waited for you to schedule... and you never did. I had no way to check in with you... and I didn't want to overstep in your life by expecting a real connection if I had just misread things, or going to the hotel to ask Charlie, especially because I wasn't supposed to tell anyone... I was just so confused."
Lucifer tightened his fists in his lap, what is it that he had told you that made you so scared? That would make you run but that had also apparently not hurt you. "I'm sorry I made you keep this a secret for so long, I didn't realize how much it was hurting you... both of us... I guess I just let my pride really get in the way, and that was stupid," Lucifer paused, "Whatever I told you that night... was it bad?" Lucifer asked looking up at you.
You took a deep breath, "It's ok, I understood why you wanted it to stay quiet, I never held that against you. And...no, not bad, but it did scare me. I didn't know what to think of it."
"Can... can you tell me what I said?" Lucifer asked with big worried eyes.
You thought for a moment, this was the part you were most scared of at this point. This is where everything could fall apart again. "Can you tell me your side of things first, before I do?"
Lucifer swallowed hard, not liking how you were dodging the question, but he nodded.
"Ok," Lucifer started, "I... was really nervous that day, for a while... I'd been wondering how much of your care was real versus an act. It hadn't felt like it had been fake for... well I mean it really had never felt fake. I remember... I wanted to ask you or tell you something related to that. I had talked to a friends about that earlier in the day..."
"Asmodeus?" you asked.
"Yes! Did I say something about him? About that conversation?" Lucifer asked.
"You said he started dating someone, but not to tell anyone. I never have," you replied.
'Wow, why was that the point I had brought up? I really was out of it,' he thought.
"Well, anyways, he encouraged me to talk to you, but I had a drink to calm myself down because I was so nervous, but one became two, became four became... way too many..." Lucifer continued sheepishly, "And then I couldn't remember the rest of the night, I woke up the next morning with a crazy hangover, trying to jog my memory, and then I got the call from the Lounge. They did tell me that you were on vacation... but then added that "the truth" was that you had put me on your ban list, that you had come back saying you "couldn't take this shit anymore" and that you were a good actor, that you were a heartbreaker, that you would "even break the King's heart if you had the chance".
You gasped and more tears welled up in your eyes, "Lucifer, it's not true! You have to believe me," you hugged Lucifer tightly in your lap, "That's not who I am, yes I can act, but I swear I haven't ever once lied to you!"
Lucifer held your face, "I know."
You stared down at him as tears rolled down your cheeks, "You do?"
He nodded, "I didn't in the moment, when the call happened, but the others did. Husk and Angel. The whole damn hotel sat me down to have an intervention to set me straight. I was still hesitant, but between your reaction now and them... I believe you. You do care about me, you always have."
"Yes, of course I care about you!" you say holding his face with one hand. Lucifer smiled and nuzzled his face into your hand.
"Lucifer, the person you talked to on the phone. Do you remember anything distinct about them? Their voice or the way they talked," you asked earnestly.
Lucifer thought, "I remember it was a feminine voice, very hissy ssssss sounds the entire time they talked."
You saw red, that was all the proof you needed.
"Cynthhhhia," you snarled. Lucifer's eyes widened, he had never seen you mad before.
"Who is Cynthia?" Lucifer asked, an edge in his voice.
"She is the biggest bitch at the Lounge, the girl I always talked about cutting down to size? That's her. She was on phone's that day as a punishment for hurting me the night I ran back to the Lounge," you seethed, "Larry must have stepped away and she must have a had enough time to slip you that lie..."
Lucifer sat up more in your lap, eyes turning red, "You think this Cynthhhhia bitch lied to get us apart? Why?"
"Yes... she always hated that I was getting paired with more "high rollers" as we would call them, well-off powerful people, she hated that I was more popular with customers than her... she must have taken the opportunity to sever our relationship to make me suffer..." you stopped as Lucifer got up from your lap stepping a few feet away from you breathing heavily with his hands balled into tight fists, "Lucifer?"
You watched as the air seemed to shake around him, his wings snapped out from his back and started to flap, his eyes burned with blind rage as this horns and tail erupted from his body, a flame appearing above his head, his claws growing large and sharp. Flame escaped from his mouth as with a demonic voice Lucifer bellowed, "HOW DARE THAT BITCH SEVER YOU FROM ME?! HER LIVE IS FOREFIT. I WILL GRIND HER BODY TO DUST. I WILL BEAT THE AFTERLIFE OUT OF HER. I WILL RIP HER APART WITH MY BARE HANDS AND FEED HER TO THE CANNIBALS. I FASHION HER FLESH INTO BOOTS. I WILL..."
You ran up and wrapped your arms around Lucifer's waist, the air stopped rumbling, his body started to relax, his flames dissipated, and he looked down at you with a softened eyes, still glowing.
"Lucifer please, I'm mad too... but please stay with me. She's not worth the energy! You can turn her into snake jerky boots tomorrow!" You say, clinging to him tightly, "I need you here now..."
Lucifer blinked back to his regular red eyes before letting himself drop back to the ground, wrapping his arms back around you, "I'm sorry, Duckie... I'm just so mad that one lie over a phone call caused so much pain for you and I..." he pulled away a little and cupped your face with one hand, "I just want to make her pay for what she has done to us."
"I do too," you say carding your fingers through his hair, "I'm sure the others would too, I'm looking at you readers, but... how about we ruin her day tomorrow. Ok? Let's not let her ruin this, she's not worth it."
Lucifer hummed into your touch and closed his eyes, allowing himself to revert back to his normal soft appearance, "Ok... on one condition," he said opening his eyes again to look into yours.
"What would that be?" you ask nervously.
"Tell me what it was that I told you. Please?" he asked with bright eyes.
You looked away briefly and then met his gaze again, you felt your face grow hot, "You sure? You're not going to get mad?"
Lucifer gave you a confused smile, "Why would I be mad at you for telling me something I said to you? Just... tell me." Lucifer still held you in a close embrace, looking into your eyes.
You breath deeply, and look down at Lucifer, "You... you told me that you loved me."
Both of your faces turned bright red as you starred at each other in tense silence.
'Are you shitting me? I told her I loved her while I was shit face plastered?! Fuck, ya... ok her reaction makes sense now' Lucifer thought.
"Oh... golly... haha... I can see why that might make you uncomfortable" Lucifer said looking away from you with a nervous laugh.
You look at Lucifer, noticing deep blush running across his pale cheeks, and smiled. You steeled yourself for the next question.
"Did you mean it?" you asked.
Lucifer looked up into your eyes, studying your face. This was the moment he had wanted so many weeks ago, this was how it was supposed to feel. Vulnerable, terrifying, but the only place he ever wanted to be. This was the moment that would change everything, but now, he knew she cared, this would not be the end of everything.
"Yes, (y/n), I love you. I've loved you for months."
You heart swelled with joy to hear him say it this time, and with him being sober and so nervous, all of your worries from the past didn't matter now. You couldn't keep your eyes from welling with tears of joy. You moved your hands up to Lucifer's face to hold his soft cheeks.
Lucifer sat in swirl of emotions as he watched you react to his statement, 'Does she... feel the same?'
"Well..." Lucifer got out, before freezing up, trying to figure out what to say.
You laughed, "I... I love you too, Lucifer."
Lucifer's eyes go wide, taking a moment to process your words, before he moves without thinking, pulling you in closer and pressing his lips against yours.
The kiss sent waves of electricity through both of your bodies. You had kissed a lot of people for work, but nothing had ever felt like this before. You felt gripped by a want to fuck Lucifer in a way you had never wanted to fuck someone before, you ached for him, you ached for only him. In that moment you were ruined for watching to touch another soul ever again. Your tongues explore each other's mouths, passionate and desperate, as if you both relied on the other to breath.
After a few minutes, you both break the kiss, pressing your foreheads together, breathing heavily.
"Fuck..." Lucifer heaved, "That was amazing... You are amazing."
You laugh, tracing a finger down Lucifer's chest, "Just wait til, I get me hands on the rest of you... If you want that... of course."
Lucifer's eye glazed over with pure lust as he looked you over, "Oh, Duckie... I have wanted nothing more than to rip your clothes off and take you to Heaven since the day I met you... but I don't want to be selfish and I feel like I would want to be. I want you to be mine, all mine, only mine," he purred into the skin of your neck. You tip your head back and let your eyes roll back with the pleasure of the sensory.
"Then you can, have me," you say. Lucifer gives you a look.
"I'm all yours, I'll quit the Lounge, move into the hotel like I wanted, and I will be only yours, if you'll have me," your eyes looked with Lucifer's.
He smiled, putting his forehead against yours, "I accept, you will be mine and I will be yours. Tomorrow, we will go down to Lounge, give them your 2 minute notice, and then... we make that little bitch Cynthhhhia rue the day she ever messed with us." Lucifer planted another long passionate kiss on your lips.
"But for now... I get the feeling that we may have some people downstairs that want to see the results of our conversation. What do you say?" Lucifer said, offering you his arm. You smile and take his arm, going out the door and making your way downstairs to the hoops and hollers of your hotel friends, especially when Lucifer kissed you again in front of all of them.
You spent the rest of the night partying and talking with the hotel crew until you grew tired. Then, Lucifer picked you up and took you up to his room in the hotel, where you and Lucifer fell asleep in either others arms again, the way you would every night from then on.
______________________________________________________________
The next morning, you wake up, tightly snuggled against Lucifer's chest, and you look up to see him unabashedly looking down with love filled eyed at you and running his fingers through your hair. He smiled warmly as your eyes met his.
"Good morning~" he cooed as he dipped his head down to kiss your lips. Your bodies moved closer to each other as you kissed, starting to get drunk off of the taste of the other. Your face and chest grew hot and red, until eventually Lucifer broke the kiss you hold your face, staring into each other's dilated eyes. Lucifer was pleased by the love drunk look on your face.
"You know, if I didn't know any better, I would take you as a pent up, untouched virgin instead of a seasoned sex worker with the way you're reacting to a simple kiss," Lucifer says smugly, taking in the deep red tone of your cheeks and the glazed look of your eyes.
"Well... I mean... I may have had plenty of physical intimacy... but it's always been for money, survival... this, however~" you says as you pull him in for another deep, desperate kiss, hand running down the side of his body before stopping on his thigh, releasing him from the kiss while keeping your lips as close to his as possible without touching. "This is something completely different entirely... unbridled desire like I've never felt in life or death... and I'm famished," you whisper.
Lucifer swallowed hard, blinking hard as his own face burned red and he felt himself get more dizzy and love drunk on your words. "Fuck... oh, Duckie... I want to do... so... many... sinful things to you. I have for months... but I do think we should prioritize taking care of your status at the Lounge... and that bitch... Because I don't know about you, but..." Lucifer rolls on top of you, pinning you to the bed, lowering his head to be next to your ear, "when I finally get to fuck you... I want you to be mine. Only... mine... Don't you agree, my Apple?" he planned a soft kiss on your neck.
You're breathing was ragged, your heart pounded in your chest, you had never been so turned on in your life. You couldn't even speak, all you could do was nod.
Lucifer looked down at you, committing the image of your body beneath him to memory before sighing, chuckling a little, giving you a kiss on both checks and then on the lips before getting off of your and getting up to start getting dressed.
You had to take a minute to let yourself breath for a minute before getting up. Lucifer smuggly looked at you over his shoulder as he buttoned up his vest, "You doing ok over their~?" he cooed.
"Shut up," you say playfully. 'Fuckkkkkk', you thought, how was this the same man that wanted to be dominated so desperately the first night you met? Should have known he was a bratty switch. He was really proving his status as the Sin of Pride with that smug ass attitude this morning, and goooooodddd was it hot.
Eventually you did get out of bed and got dressed for the day, Lucifer giving you a longing look as you did. Before long, it was time for you and Lucifer to head to the Lounge, together. Others from the hotel had learned about the reason for the miscommunication and lack of contact with you during the celebration the night before and many people wanted to come with to watch the confrontation unfold. So soon, you, Lucifer, Charlie, Angel, Cherri, Niffty, and even Alastor, much to Lucifer's dismay, were ready to make your way out to the Entertainment District. Husk and Vaggie also wanted to go, but someone needed to stay behind and man the hotel, so they just asked for a play by play of the events when everyone returned.
"Ready everyone?" Lucifer called out before tapping his cane on the ground, opening a portal right in front of the Lounge. Lucifer offered you his arm, which you took before stepping out of the portal onto the street in front of your place of work, followed by all of your friends. Immediately upon stepping out onto the street, onlookers started to look, whispers, point, and take pictures as they saw the King with you on his arm, followed by the Princess, a famous Porn Star, and the Radio Demon, with Niffty and Cherri tagging along.
Lucifer opened the door to the Lounge and walked in, striding up to the front counter with you on his arm. Larry turned around to greet the new customers just to find himself facing the King of Hell and company.
"Y-your highness, with (y/n), and the Princess, Angel, t-the Radio Demon, and... uhhh," Larry stopped looking down at Niffty.
"Hi! I'm Niffty!" Niffty gave a sharp smile while waving a knife in her hand. "And I'm Cherri Bomb," she added.
Larry blinked looking at Niffty before looking back up at Lucifer, "Right... uhh... Your Majesty," he bowed, realizing the should have done that the first time. "To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit? And with one of my girls," he said shooting you a quick 'What the hell is happening here?!' look.
"Haha, well! You must be Larry! Let me introduce myself to you my fine man. Hi," Lucifer says extending his hand to Larry, "I'm Lance", Lucifer said, darkening his eyes.
"Oh!" Larry said shaking his hand before the realization kicked in, "Oh..." he looked at you, then Lucifer, back to you, then back at Lucifer, "OOohhhhhhh...." Larry let go of Lucifer's hand, his body starting to shake a little.
Lucifer smirked and wrapped an arm around you, "We were wanting to talk to you able a... troubling customer service issue that miss (y/n) and I experienced a few weeks ago that interrupted my services with her... if you have the time that is..." Lucifer said with as smile in his face that did not reach his rage filled eyes.
Larry panicked, "Uh.. uhh yes! Of course! Uhhh... would you like to come back to my office or..."
"Oh, no, my good sir, out here is just fine," continuing his sharp smile, looking out at the sea of girls and customers watching the interaction with growing interest.
"O-Ok, ya sure," Larry clears his throat, "So, uhh... what seems to be the issue?"
"Well... you see... your associate here and I had not scheduled any appointments for the last few weeks due to a... concerning miscommunication issue. You see, while this one was out on her much deserved vacation, I was called and told that she was out for a few days... but then they corrected themself and told me I was banned from scheduling with her again... but that I was free to utilize the services of other girls," Lucifer said distain slowly slipping into his voice, his smile starting to strain.
Larry's expression changed from fear to frustration, "Oh... that is troubling, I can confirm that (y/n) did not express any desire to ban you, sir. I apologize... I had no idea that happened... You... wouldn't happen to know who it was that you talked to that day, would you?"
"I didn't catch a name, but it was someone with a feminine voice and elongated "S"s.... kinda... serpentine sounding. You... wouldn't happen to know of anyone on your staff that would fit that description... would you?" Lucifer said, his smile now fully flat with half opened, unenthused eyes.
Larry balled his hands into fits, "As a matter of fact, your highness... I do... I'll... be... right back..." Larry made his way to the back to find the girl that matched the description, the sea of people parting as he lumbered through.
Lucifer looked up at you and winked, "Showtime" he mouthed to you. You smiled back at him as you started to hear the familiar screams of Cynthhhhia as Larry dragged her up to the front lobby, tossing her on the floor in front of Lucifer and you.
"AAHHHHH!!! Larry what the fuck! I wasssss in the the middle of a sssssession! What's the big ide-" Cynthhhhia finally looked up to Lucifer and you standing in front of her, glaring down at her, with his arm around your waist at his side. "Ohhhhh! Y-your highness, itssssss and honor, w-wha-what is thisssss all about?" She tried to smile at him, here eyes darting to you and to the others watching around the room.
"Apparently, a few weeks ago, you had a little of a communication issue with Mr. Morningstar here, or should I say... Mr. Lance... Care to explain, Cynthhhhia?" Larry hissed through clenched teeth.
"Lance, wha-" Cynthhhhia finally remembered, she now looked at you, then Lucifer, back to you, then him. Then she looked back at Larry, then around the room, to Charlie and Angel, then back to Lucifer. In that moment, she didn't not understand how this happened, but she knew she was absolutely fucked.
"Well... I feel like you already know... but I'll just ssssay it. I lied, I lied to Lanc-Lucifer... about (y/n)'sssss vacation, I had no one around ssssso I told him he had been banned, he didn't ask any questionsssss and didn't try sssssscheduling another appointment... Ssssso I reported that I had called and that he would call back to ressssschedule... I thought I was in the clear..." Cynthhhhia said looking at the ground, then looked up again, "I guess there were sssssome factorsssss that I didn't not account for.."
"Ya! Like us!" Angel added.
"Like her developing friendships and bonds during her time with my dad that cared to ask why she was not around anymore, and we figured out that these two had two very different understandings of why they were not able to see the other," Charlie said with a triumphant smile, gesturing to her dad and you.
"Cynthhhhia, why would you do this?" Larry asked coldly.
Cynthhhhia hissed, "For the same reason as alwaysssss, I hated her sssssuccesssss! I saw a chanccccce and I took it. The real question issss, why did you all care sssssso much. She's is just a ssssstupid, ssssselfish, fake, whore!"
In an instant, Lucifer's demon form emerged, horns, wings, red eyes, tail and all, and he flicked his sharp tail to her neck, lifting her head to meet his gaze, "Because my dear, ssssssweet, idiot," he spat, "She is actually none of those things. She is the kindest, sweetest, warmest, most loving, and selfless woman I have ever met, and because of that... I fell in love with her."
The room gasped, including Cynthhhhia and Larry. "You're little stunt simply caused us to be apart before we could talk it out. Thanks to my daughter, we figured it out, we figured you out. So now... my question for both of you is... how do we rectify this.. little problem? This certainly caused myself and my love much grief over the last few weeks, and it sounds like this putrid snake was causing my dear problems long before that at this establishment... and I simply cannot let that stand," Lucifer said, starring daggers into Cynthhhhia's soul.
"Well uhhh... as far as I can control... Cynthhhhia is fired from my establishment and will be backlisted from every brothel and porn studio in the Pride Circle effect of immediately, she will be kicked out of housing with us, and I will turn a blind idea to anything that becomes of her outside of this establishment... Does that seem fair?" Larry asked. Cynthhhhia seethed on the ground.
Lucifer smiled, "A good start but not enough, there is more I will require, and I have a list of demands."
Larry shifted uncomfortably, "Of course your highness, what would those be?"
Lucifer looked at you and smiled, "I request the release of (y/n) from her work contract here, as well as her housing contract," Lucifer looked back at Larry, "She will not be needing to be here anymore now that she is with me."
Larry made a displeased face, and looked at you "Is this what you want Babydoll?"
You nodded, "It has nothing to do with you, Larry, you have been good to me..." you look to Lucifer and the others, "I just finally found where I belong... and I need to see where this goes."
Larry nodded, "Consider it done. I'll miss you, kid."
Lucifer nodded, "Well..." he clapped his hands, " I guess we are done here then! Duckie, I will have your stuff taken out of your old room and moved to the hotel. As for you," Lucifer said looking down at Cynthhhhia, who was on the floor trying to crawl away, but froze in place when addressed, "We are not quiet through with you." Lucifer wrapped his tail around her waist and pulled her along as he walk out the door, followed by the other hotel crew and some interested patrons and girls.
Cynthhhhia screamed as she was dragged and tossed out onto the street in front of Lucifer and the others.
Lucifer looked to you with a slight bow, gesturing towards Cynthhhhia, "My darling, would you like to do the honors?" he purred.
You shrugged, "I don't really wanna touch her, but I'll start her off," you say stretching your arms as you walked towards her.
Cynthhhhia cowered and pleaded with you, you wound up your arm and slugged Cynthhhhia in the face, sending her flying back several feet. You were met with a crowd of cheers and yelps, Lucifer nodded approvingly at your punch. Lucifer next rolled up his sleeves and pummeled her into the ground a few dozen times before getting up staying he had enough. Cynthhhhia was still conscious, but barely.
Lucifer then offered the chance up to the rest of the crew. Niffty ran up and gave her a few quick stabs, then to your surprise, Alastor stepped forward with a sinister grin on his face. You and Lucifer gave each other a confused look, then looked back at him.
"Now Cynthhhhia, darling, as much as I enjoyed seeing how much torment your little stunt caused, I do say I that I am not very fond of how it impacted the overall morale of the hotel, and I simply cannot have that," Alastor said as his horns and body started to grow larger and more sinister, his face turning more into the radio face you had seen it become before in battle. "I'm sorry, my dear, but I'm going to need to make an example out of you, to show everyone what happened when you mess with the Hazbin Hotel and it's residents. And besides! ...my radio broadcast has been in need of some new screams!" Alastor laughed maniacally before engulfing Cynthhhhia in his mystical black tentacles and carried her off to be ripped apart and have her screams added to his collect on his broadcast.
You and the other's starred off after Alastor in horror as he took of with Cynthhhhia. "Wow..." you said, "That uhhh... that was not the ending to her I expected. But I'll take it!" You smiled looking at Lucifer who smiled and rolled his eyes. He then grabbed your waist, pulling you into a dip and kissed you deeply for all of Hell to see.
"Come on," he said breaking from the kiss, "Lets get you home."
Home.
You liked the sound of that.
______________________________________________________________
One last chapter I think! And IT.WILL.HAVE.SMUT. xoxo, dany As usual, leave a comment if you want added to the taglist so that you can get notifications when future chapters drop! xoxo, dany (OMG there are so many of you!😍 Please let me know if the tag isn't working for you) Taglist :(red names are not tagging for some reason 😢) @froggybich @wonderlandangelsposts @glowinthedarkbones1150 @marydragneell @crescent-z @superdinosaurnacho @jam0001 @kyo-kyo1 @so-get-this-sammy @lilzebeth @kelppsstuff @loquacious-libra @pinkhoneydrop @luleck @writer-girl99 @lavenz @stormz369 @littleladydemon @soujiswife @melday0105 @luluxx118 @sseleniaa @futureittomainn @cktkat @zaneyyyy @uravitsy @liecoris @starlitvenus @hannahrose130 @elleofdragons @butch-medusae @concentratedconcrete @erosamasan @stranger-chan @aquaamethyst96 @lxkeee @holyspacething @hulyenl @leximus98 @lu-ferri12 @mixplara @katnisspeetaprim @rebecca-hvnstn @roboticsuccubus83 @nekemewlita @femboyfatalle @thelethex @cryptidghostgirl @snowlotr @bangchansdirty-slut @glowymxxn @mcueveryday @hotvillianapologist @oneiric-rotaerc @wolfdaddyalphasworld @sleepypottersworld @wisterialagoon @theredviolets @theperfectmangovoid @lemonmoonmochi @sapphireravensworld @ezi0724 @undertalephanjackandmark-blog
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sourbinnie · 10 months
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☆ regrets & replacements ☆ (2)
♡ genre ¿? ♡ -> angst with a hopeful ending ♡ pair ¿? ♡ -> hyung line!skz x gn!reader ♡ plot ¿? ♡ -> it's not about making up, it's about owning up to your mistakes. ♡ warnings ¿? ♡ -> swearing ♡ request ¿? ♡ -> yes!
a/n -> BEFORE YOU READ ; if you're expecting an angsty ending, this is not gonna please you but if you expected everything to be happy and good in the end, this isn't for you either. i really did try to write a part where they fully make up and i couldn't do it. i don't even if it's my angsty side kicking in or if it's just instinct where i just don't find it possible for that to happen. i also didn't feel like giving in and making it sad as hell because i got requested to do something happy and i'm sorry if i disappointed that person. i literally couldn't do it:( and i'm really sad with myself about this one, i would say this is a neutral ending and i'm gonna leave it at that.
first part -> hyung line
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chan ✉
waking up with no chan next to you was rare. your birthday was gone now but not your feelings and that sucked because that meant you would have to talk to chan about what happened. you didn't feel bad about not explaining it to him, you kinda hoped he already realized his mistake but even if he did it wouldn't change the course of things right now.
as you got up and walked to your living room, you saw the never ending pile of gifts. the flowers, the cake, the different things the boys got you and of course your boyfriend chan. he looked tired as hell, bags under his eyes and just overall the energy he usually had wasn't there. he looked at you and sighed when he saw the the reddish eyes from crying but he still had hope in him.
"you know getting me stuff won't make me forgive you that easily channie." you said and chan nodded as he heard your words. he wasn't doing this to earn your forgiveness, he knew he didn't deserve that in the end. but he still wanted you to have a birthday, even if the day had gone by, you deserved a celebration and he would leave if you asked him to because he just respected you that much.
"this isn't for you to forgive me even if i am so fucking sorry. this is because you deserved a good day yesterday and because your boyfriend's an idiot, he ruined that." he muttered and it was your time to nod as you listened to him. there was no easy way to forgive him really because what he did hurt you so deeply and this was beyond just forgetting.
"why did you do that chan? i mean i don't really expect you to always remember my birthday but i wasn't expecting to find out that you spend it with someone who deeply hates me." you explained and felt like you were going to cry again thinking about it. it wasn't fair to you and chan knew better than that, he didn't want to push it but he did want to fix things. losing you was not in his mind right now, he needed to make things right.
"when soohee called me yesterday i left without a comment because i truly was worried that something happened to her. it turned out she broke up with her boyfriend and whatever, begged me to stay with her and everything just went by so fucking fast. i didn't notice anything and i just-." he had to cut himself off because he knew he was rambling and he was desperate to make things okay but he was feeling so broken. thinking about you being all alone and waiting for him to come back was probably gonna haunt him and that made the tears build up in his eyes. "i know i don't deserve it (y/n) but please let me make it right."
you looked at him as you took in everything. you wanted to believe him because you knew chan and you knew how kind hearted he was when it came to his friends. you saw how he realized that soohee wasn't who he thought she was and it's hard losing a friend, you hated that this was all happening and felt absolutely betrayed but you were not heartless and chan crying always made you feel the worst way.
"channie, i don't know if i'm gonna be able to forgive you right now. but i would really like to spend the day with you because i missed you so much yesterday." you said and he could feel himself crying more but understanding. he was so scared that this was gonna be the end but he was given another chance. you got close to him and as soon as you were next to him, he wrapped his arms around you.
"i'll make it right, i promise." he mumbled through tears and you really hoped he would. drying the tears from his face with your thumb as you gave him a little kiss on the lips and he smiled again. it wasn't quite alright yet but the wound would heal eventually.
minho ✉
you knew it wasn't gonna be easy to go through the night all by yourself. of course you had your friends there but usually having minho by your side made things easier. jisung stayed by your side, disappointed in his friend and sad to witness the falling out but he was rooting for him to show up and make things right. the night was still young and he had been texting minho to come over even if you told him not to. jisung knew better though, he could read you and your eyes were always at the door.
when minho arrived at the place, he sighed deeply and prayed that he could fix this. the boys greeted him but jisung had a look on his face of "make this right" and it was scary. he wasn't the type to be afraid but if he did lose you today, that would be his biggest fear coming true and he didn't know what he would do without you.
he saw you looking as beautiful as ever out on the balcony. he had you all alone, he needed to talk and he needed to choose his words carefully before thinking of the worst.
"minho? i told you not to show up." you said but you didn't sound confident in your words. he could tell there was a mix of anger and sadness in your tone and it was all because of him, this wasn't going to be easy.
"i could not miss my partner's birthday even if i screwed up everything." he said and looked at you. you weren't even looking in his direction but he was captured by your beauty every time he glanced at you and it was beyond your outfit and how you did your hair. he got so lucky with you and knowing that this could be the last night he saw you would kill him slowly. "i can't lose you (y/n) and i know everything's beyond wrong right now but i just need you."
"i didn't feel bad that you forgot or even that you were with her of all people. but you lied to me and we've never had an instance where i felt like things were beyond repair but right now i just don't know what to say minho." you said and you didn't want to cry right now but it was all too much. he felt like crying himself as he saw those spill from your eyes because like you said, there wasn't a situation that you lived before where you guys wouldn't make up and he felt you slipping away from him.
"don't say that, i don't deserve you and i should've remembered in the first place. i choose someone who doesn't understand that i met the love of my life already and that i'm not gonna give up on them. i won't put you second ever again (y/n) and i know you probably won't believe me right now but i truly do mean it." he said confidently and you looked at him, meeting his honest eyes. "i lied i know and i thought i was making things better by keeping soohee away from everyone. i cut her off and i know i should've done it sooner."
you took his hand in yours as you looked down. he knew you did this when you were nervous, when you needed to hold or do something to distract you so he just let you. 
"i can't forgive you even if i want to because all i wanted was for you to show up and explain yourself." you said and it warmed his heart. even if he let you down, you always believed in him and will always wait for him. "minho i love you, would you give me time?"
"all the time you need, i'll be here waiting for you as long as it takes." he responded and even if it hurt that things went so wrong, there was a glimpse of hope in the end. "i love you more (y/n)." he then said and you kissed his cheek as you headed inside. 
changbin ✉
waking up to someone yelling over the phone wasn't really what you had in mind. you went to the living room where all the noise was coming from and you saw changbin looking as tired as he could be. you really didn't expect for him to stay in your apartment and for him to be mad was rare. 
"changbin what's going on?" you asked genuinely concerned because even if all the events from yesterday were on your mind, you cared too much about him to not be there if he needed you. on the other hand, changbin couldn't take that you still were looking at him with caring eyes, he deserved to be yelled at and deserved to be kicked out.
"i'm cutting someone out of my life and they didn't make it easy. as soon as they started insulting you, i had to say some things that were not quite nice but i don't regret it." he responded and you could imagine who he was talking about. it still surprised you that he did that because even if you hated her, you knew that changbin in the end cared about her but from how angry he was you could see there was no going back.
"you didn't have to do that changbin." you muttered and he was so sad to hear that, not because of soohee and cutting off their "friendship" but because you genuinely thought he shouldn't have defended you. "i mean it's not like you didn't go there yesterday and spent all day with her when she needed you."
"stop that right now. first of all, i know what i did and i'm always gonna be fucking sorry about not being here with you, celebrating your day and choosing someone who clearly wanted this to happen all along." changbin said and you were glad he was now finally realizing but you also felt like it was too late. "but i'm not gonna hear you say that you don't want me to defend you because i'm always gonna be choosing you even if you want me to go right now, you will always be the one for me. i'm genuinely serious (y/n), i don't want soohee and i'm never gonna want her because i am in love with you."
"and i'm always gonna be in love with you but it doesn't change the fact that you hurt me." you said and he nodded now getting what you meant and how you felt. there might no be going back from this one and he just wanted to disappear right then and there. 
"tell me what i can do to fix this. i'll do anything you want me to because i swear i can't live without you." he begged basically and you could hear his voice getting higher pitched. it wasn't common for him to cry and if you saw him cry, you would end up crying as well.
"binnie i don't know. this is not the end and i don't want you to leave, can we pretend for a while that yesterday didn't happen?" you said and he looks at you. his eyes filled with tears but he still finds the strength to hold on to you and give you a hug. you felt like you needed to be in his arms, maybe even more so yesterday than today but right now is all you have and your birthday is long gone.
"i will make it up to you, i swear i will." he whispered as he kissed your forehead. you let the tears go, staining his shirt but he didn't care as long as he had you in his arms where you belonged. 
hyunjin ✉
to your dismay and your surprise at the same time, he was knocking at your door an hour later. you knew it was him, he had been spamming your phone ever since you left the building but you couldn't even respond from how disappointed you were. even now you were doubting if you should open the door or leave him knocking all night but you couldn't do that without a neighbor complaining so you decided to head to the entrance and open the door.
"i told you not to come. go back to soohee or whatever you had in mind for today." you said and you wanted to close the door again but he stopped you before you could do it. you looked as he walked into your apartment and took in his appearance. he looked like he almost ripped his hair out and like he had been crying, so pretty much like you did right now.
"i don't even know where to start." he said pacing back and forth and as much as you wanted to hate him, you grabbed his hand and sat down with him before he kept spinning around your apartment. that action alone was enough to calm him down but the glare you were giving him was making him doubt himself all over again. "the only thing i have in mind right now is the fact that i don't want to lose you because i was so fucking stupid."
"you were and i truly don't know how you're gonna get out of this one jinnie. this is beyond it being my birthday just why? why didn't you pick up? why did you show up with her? why didn't you defend me? i feel so stupid." you expressed and the tears were rolling again but so were hyunjin's because he could not stand seeing you cry. you didn't have to feel stupid, he was the stupid one and the one that messed everything up on a special day.
"i didn't pick up because she kept telling me that it was an unknown number calling and hanged it up for me. i showed up with her because she told me she would help me pick up your present at the end of practice and i didn't defend you because i truly wasn't expecting her to say that. i thought she was my friend and i thought she cared about me but i had to kick her out as soon as i saw it all go down." he said in between tears and rambles. you didn't want him to justify himself or his actions but it was nice hearing his side even if you were still very much hurt by everything that happened. 
"hyunjin i always told you how i don't want to interfere in your friendships but she has always hated me and you put her first." you said and he nodded, he was already accepting defeat because he truly did fuck it up this time. you pushed the tears away because you didn't feel like crying anymore and yet they wouldn't stop. 
"i'll leave, you don't deserve to spend the rest of your birthday with someone who did you wrong." he said and even in all this pain, it still hurt when hyunjin didn't fight it anymore. there was a point in all the fights that you've had where he gave up because he could not take in your anger or your sadness, he just wanted to see you smile again. right now he felt like he was holding back what could be a good day for you because it was still your birthday after all and he didn't want to ruin it anymore.
"hyunjin, stay. i can't say that i'm past it yet but i just wanna be with you right now even after all that happened, i just don't see myself going out celebrating if it's not with you by my side." you said, giving him a little smile through all the tears. he got closer to you as he placed a kiss on your lips which you responded to, the most hurtful one you shared yet.
"i'll stay for as long as you want me to and i'll leave if you need me to." he whispered and you nodded because everything was hurting but his words would always find a way to your heart. his hand on your cheek as he caressed it slowly and you met for another kiss.
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lxkeee · 3 months
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Hi! Is it okay if I ask for Lucifer seeing female sinner!reader when she is breaking down, panicking from both insecurity and overthinking (generally having trouble breathing and not being able to stop herself from crying at all) and being there with her in general?
Like, what would he say, how would he react, how would he comfort her, stuff like that!
notes: I was debating whether this should be platonic or romantic lmao.
warnings: panic attack.
edit: I fucked up, it said sinner and I accidentally made reader a fallen angel here lmfao omgg 😭
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Lucifer is trying his best, even though he dissociates a lot and doesn't realize how much time has passed, he spends most of his time in his room just making rubber ducks or doing paperworks. After he and Lilith split, he had fallen more into depression and began to slowly lose his will to do his duties, hell would've crumbled apart if it weren't for his closest friend who decided to help him run his kingdom. [Y/n] fell from grace at the same time as him as she was an accomplice, Lucifer begged for her forgiveness years ago—apologizing for bringing her to this mess but the woman just chuckled and told him it was fine, she believed in his intentions and it was her decision to follow him.
Thinking about her, he realizes he barely saw her, let alone he forgot when was the last time he saw her. A couple of months ago? He barely saw her as she took it upon herself to lead as he isn't fit to lead as of lately, she is his right hand man afterall.
On top of that, with her taking on his duties, she also made sure to check up on him occasionally to make sure he is still functioning.
“I really need to show her my appreciation... She's doing so much for me...” Lucifer mutters as he lies on his bed, a few rubber ducks on his mattress. His recent memory of her is when she came back to check up on him and he noticed how tired she looked.
“Luci, how are you doing these days? Do you feel slightly better?” the door in his bedroom opened as she entered his room, he was making a new rubber duck and her voice cut off his concentration. He turned around to face her and gave her a grin, “I have been feeling slightly better, [n/n]! Time off seems to be doing me some good.” he says with a smile but his smile faded a little as he noticed how her eyes looked so... Tired... The usual sparkle gone and her once vibrant orbs now dull. Worry fills his chest as he hesitantly asks her, “Are you okay...?” he spoke softly and her eyes widened before giving him a closed eyed smile and when she opened her eyes again, that sparkle was there once more.
“Of course, don't worry too much about me. You should worry about yourself first.” [y/n] says softly with a smile and he just nodded, deciding not to push her boundaries. “If you say so...” he says softly and the two hanged out that afternoon before she decided to take a rest in her room—as she had a room in the palace as she did help in making it.
Lucifer sighs once more, he's worried for her. She's always working so hard. He grabbed a nearby rubber duck and held it near his face, “Mr. Waddles, I'm such a bad friend... She keeps on checking up on me but I forget to check up on her...” he says softly. He's afraid to admit it out loud, but he always loves her. Sure, he loves Lilith with all his heart but it was [y/n] who's his first love but he was too scared to confess and then he met Lilith and he fell inlove with her. Though, after his separation with Lilith, it feels like his love for [y/n] is returning but he doesn't want to think too much about it and wants it to develop properly. After all, he doesn't want to make her a rebound. That's why he wanted to fix himself first and give himself time.
He sighs to himself once more before eventually getting out of bed, he needs to get a drink. He got out of his room, passing by many rooms. He passes by [y/n]'s room. His body stopped as he heard soft sobs. It was coming from [y/n]'s room.
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A few moments ago.
[y/n] angrily storms back into the castle, tears running down her cheeks. She just finished a meeting with Adam at the heaven's embassy building. It was just a meeting about hell's population. The meeting would've been bearable if it weren't for Adam's misogynistic attitude towards her. How she isn't fit to lead and how egoistical she is for putting herself in Lucifer's shoes. The major stabbing words she received is when Adam told her how pathetic she is for doing this to a man who doesn't even bat an eye on her. “You're really doing all of this for a dick you can't suck.” is what Adam said to her condescendingly with a mocking laughter. She doesn't even think of Lucifer in lustful thoughts, she only sees him in romantic scenarios, going on dates, holding hands, being there for each other.
It truly reminded her that Lucifer wouldn't be hers.
She's grateful that she was able to keep it together for the rest of the meeting but when she left, she couldn't hold back anymore and quickly teleported to her room.
She couldn't think properly. Chest heaving up and down irregularly. Barely catching her breath as she covers her mouth with her hands to muffle her cries so that Lucifer won't hear her. Though, a few sobs escaped here and there.
She felt so pathetic, so tired. Voices of other demon's comments on her work are starting to repeat in her head. She was only upset by the comments made by Adam but now, she's crying for everything as all the pain and exhaustion she was bottling up has now exploded.
She curls up in her bed, wanting to be as small as possible. Hair messy, dark circles around her eyes. Dull [e/c] orbs. Shining no more as she was exposed more and more to the cruelty of mankind.
She can only have herself to blame, she wanted to be here with him. A speck of light in darkness, slowly getting dull.
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Lucifer hesitantly holds his hand towards the door handle to [y/n]'s room, he knows she's crying in there and each second his heart slowly breaks for her. He is debating whether to leave her alone or go inside and comfort her.
“For fucks sake, I need to go there and be there for her.” he mutters before sighing and then taking a deep breath. Curling up his fingers and then knocked on her door.
“[y/n]? It's me... Can I come in...?” He asked softly and he could hear the hitch of her voice when she heard him.
A brief moment, silence.
“Yes... You can... Come in...” she said behind the door, her voice audibly breaking and Lucifer was close to crying just by hearing how broken she sounded. But this isn't about him, so he composed himself and opened the door.
A truly heartbreaking sight to see, his best friend sitting at the corner of her bed and room, knees pressed against her chest as she tries to look as composed while her breathing is uneven. Eyes red and puffy, dark circles surrounding it. “Oh... [N/n], What's wrong...?” he asked softly and that question alone was enough to make her burst into tears. Lucifer panicked and quickly closed the door and then went to her side. Putting an arm around her. “Sshh... It's okay, I'm here... You can talk to me...” he says softly and [y/n] just sobbed and continues to hyperventilate. He remembers how she used to calm him down when he was in this position. “[y/n]... Look at me...” he says, voice gentle and [y/n] hiccups but hesitantly looked at him. “Can you try to focus on your breathing for me? Follow my breathing... Can you do that...?” he asked softly and she weakly nodded. “Okay... Take a deep breath and inhale...” he says, doing the action and gently urging her to follow. [Y/n] trying her best to match his slow and deep breathing. “Now... Exhale...” he says softly and exhaled, [y/n] following shortly after him. “You're doing great sweetheart. Now inhale...” he says, “Exhale...”
Once Lucifer notices she's beginning to calm down, he needs to move into the next step. “Focus on your breathing sweetheart, can you identify five things you can see for me...?” he asked softly and she nodded weakly, still trying to focus on her breathing while looking at her surroundings.
“The desk...”
“The window...”
“My pillows...”
“The hanged picture of us...”
“You...”
Lucifer smiled, his other hand gently playing with her hair, “You're doing so good sweetheart, now.. Can you tell me four things you can touch for me please?” he asked softly and she nodded.
“Your suit...”
“My blanket...”
“My pillows...”
“Your hand...”
She says softly, her breathing slowly going back to normal and he nodded, proud of her. “Very good, now, can you name me three things you can hear?” he asked softly and she nodded.
“Your heartbeat...”
“Your voice...”
“And your hand rubbing against my arm...”
Lucifer was trying hard not to blush and quickly calmed himself, “You're doing so well, can you tell me two things you can smell...? Can you do it for me?” he asked softly, grabbing a nearby tissue and gently wiped the tears off her cheeks, “Your perfume... And the smell of apples...” she answers.
“Now... Can you answer one more question for me?” he asked her softly and she nodded, “Can you name me one thing you can taste...?” he asked softly and she nodded, “my... Tears...” she answers, letting out a small chuckle... Occasionally hiccuping but she significantly calmed down. “Now there's my girl, are you feeling better now...?” he asked softly and she nodded, feeling exhausted after crying so much. “Do you want to talk about it...?” he asked and she shook her head and he nodded, “Alright, how about we rest for a bit? I am sure you have been very tired.” he says and allows [y/n] to get into a comfortable position to lie down on her bed. He was surprised when she held his hand, looking at him as if asking him to join her. He sighs before smiling softly and decided to take the extra space of her bed and cuddled her with her the little spoon. Both of them could feel their hearts beating erratically but decided to calm down as this isn't the time and this isn't the first time they cuddled in bed. [Y/n] was so tired that after calming herself, she quickly fell asleep on his arms.
Lucifer noticed her to have fallen asleep so quickly and he just smiled and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. “Sleep well, [y/n]. You deserve it.”
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churipu · 4 months
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HAIIII IPIN !!!!!!! can i request gojo, geto, and nanami (separate) having a gf that's really optimistic? just someone who sees the good in everything and anything, and positive at all times! thank SOOOO much !!!!
JJK MEN + OPTIMISTIC GIRLFRIEND
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featuring. gojo satoru, geto suguru, nanami kento x fem! reader
warning. people being mean to u >:(
note. HAIIII ANONN!!! i love this request bcs sometimes i read books, mangas, watch movies, you name 'em and see a certain character having the most positive mindset and i just go must protecc >:( anyways, thank you anon for requesting just after i opened the request box, istg i love all your ideas so much it makes me feel full <;33
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GOJO SATORU. absolutely hates the way you try to see the good in people — specifically people who have hurt your feelings in the past. he just wonders what goes on in your mind to just forgive and forget everyone who has wronged you.
you did. but not him.
"baby, that guy called you names when you were in high school!" gojo whines, laying down on the bed, draping an arm over your torso, "why are you still willing to meet him?"
"satoru, he said he was sorry!" you smiled at him, tracing his features softly — the male grumbled but leaned into your touch, "and plus it's not nice to hold grudges, it's been what? how many years?"
a loud whine escapes his throat as he pulled you close, "it doesn't matter how many years it has been, he still hurt your feelings. and nobody does that to my baby," he said, miffed.
you couldn't help but to chuckle, "well, you are coming along, so i have nothing to worry about."
the male grins, "damn right i am coming, he better sleep with one eye open starting from now," gojo threatens.
gojo just cannot wrap his head around your concept of "forgive-and-forget" because you never hold grudges, you forget everything and still talk to people who've wronged you, and you still have the heart to accept them.
as much as people say "forgive and forget", they end up at least holding the tiniest bit of grudge — or even a bigger grudge, right? but you? you don't. you actually forgive and forget.
well — thankfully, not him. he takes his job to protect you seriously, from any kind of harm, including monsters (people who were mean to you) both in the past, present, and possibly the future.
"baby, can you stop hanging out with that one girl? the one who always wears the purple colored eye-shadow?" he asks you, wrapping his arms around your waist.
"hm? why?"
"i don't like the vibe she gives out. it's giving...well...cruella de vil." he murmurs into your neck, nuzzling his nose in content as you went on with your skincare routine.
"satoru," you mumbled, "you can't just judge her by her vibes."
he groans, "but baby, i swear i could just feel it! she's evil," he whispers in your ear.
"satoru."
"okay, fine. just tell me if she does anything to you, i'll give her a piece of my mind (hollow purple)." he mutters out, pouting and upset as you brushed his speculations off.
GETO SUGURU. he loves it and hates it at the same time. geto loves how positive you are against the world — and what more does he need, really? it's you and him against the world at this point, although he feels like he doesn't contribute much to your positive energy (that's what he thinks).
geto thinks of himself as a pretty negative person. and you know. the both of you had a lot of deep talks about everything, including what you both had in mind. and honestly, geto wasn't surprised if he hears you talking about how your life was going smoothly; and his was just a contradiction to what you have.
it's life, people come and go. but geto seemed skeptical of that term, why couldn't people come and stay? he finds it hard to believe that you could be the one leaving him at anytime of the day, and the thought just terrifies the male.
the death of amanai put a hole in his mind that couldn't be closed off, and it fucking scarred him. but you were there for him, you didn't sugar coat words or tell him white lies — you tell him everything, straight to his face, and your choices of words made him feel loved. what else could he ask for?
"'m sorry," he mutters into your shoulder, and his voice comes out a bit muffled.
you brushed his nape gently, "it's alright sugu, you know you don't have to apologize for being sad, right?" you tell him, pressing a kiss onto the side of his head, "it's okay to be a little sad."
sometimes he asks himself if he really deserved you or not. but at the end of the day; you always convince him that he deserved it.
geto hates your optimism sometimes because he watches people trample over you and you brush them off with a smile, it makes him feel angry. he asks himself why you were doing this to yourself? believe me when he tried asking you to try talking back, or putting up a fight.
"angel, you know it makes me kind of sad that you'd let people talk to you that way," he said to you, grazing his finger over your cheek gently.
you shot him a gentle smile, "'ts okay sugu, what good do i get from arguing back to them, really?"
he just pulls you into his embrace, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck, saying nothing. god, he just wanted to protect you from the world — why does everyone have to be so fucking mean to you?
"will you be mad if i tell them off for you?" he asks
"depends on your methods, tell me about it."
"threatening them. if it doesn't work, violence." he mutters out briefly.
"sugu, no."
NANAMI KENTO. he doesn't mind it, he finds you endearing, really. a cat getting hurt? he'll accompany you to the vet with it. or a child crying because of a fall? he'll watch you help them without any single thoughts behind.
he just loves how selfless you are. nanami once read a quote, "when given the choice between being right or being kind, choose kind." and every time he sees a selfless act from you — he just kinds of chanted it in his mind, and tell you what, nanami is such a proud boyfriend.
nanami loves how you see the good in everything, a person spilled their food on you? you tell them mistakes happen. a person bumping into you and then blaming you for it? you tell them you're sorry and thought that maybe they just had a really bad day.
but sometimes he couldn't help but to worry over you — someone so positive, bubbly, and optimistic around people who (probably) have disgusting minds. when he's not around to keep an eye on you, he just worries that someone might took advantage of your kindness and throw it out the window.
and he wouldn't be there to stop it from happening.
"ken, i'm going to go out for a hang out. it's fine, i've got my friends with me!" god, the jitters that he gets whenever you mention your friends — he was never really fond of the friends you have now, especially since they were trying hard to earn his attention. he knows they were just using you.
the texts they sent to him behind your back, the shit-talking about you, and everything else. god, he wanted to tell you about it; but he just didn't have the heart to, because he knows it will break your heart.
although nanami told them off quite rudely, defending you — it baffled him to how they still try to hang out with you with no shame after. and he tried telling you about how he doesn't like them, but you tell him it was fine.
"may i come along then?" just the thought of leaving you alone with those people pisses him off to the core, if he can't stop you from being friends with them — he will be with you.
when you agreed, he made it his job to expose them as nicely as he could. and he succeeded, oh the ecstasy he felt when you finally told them you didn't feel like hanging out with them anymore.
(and he ended up showing you the texts).
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© CHURIPU 2023 , DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ANYWHERE !
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roosterforme · 7 months
Text
The Younger Kind Part 32 | Rooster x Reader
Summary: Bradley is used to feeling comfortable around you, so when he arrives home and things feel strained, he wants to understand why. The more you tell him about what has you so upset, the more he wants to try to fix everything. But you don't know if he can do anything to mend your confidence.
Warnings: Angst, swearing, fluff, and age gap (18+)
Length: 5600 words
Pairing: Single dad!Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x babysitter!female reader
Check out my masterlist for more! The Younger Kind masterlist.
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Nat called and texted the next day to check in with you and Noah. It didn't matter how many times you lied and told her that you were just fine, she said she wanted to be sure. But you knew you were barely holding on, and the next two days without Bradley were going to be really hard. 
Because now it wasn't just the USB drive. It was also your hand. And the broken glass. And the way Noah cried. You were currently curled up in Bradley's bed with Noah sound asleep in your arms, and you didn't even want to go to work tomorrow. Your hand was aching, and the gash looked terrible. Even though you had done your best with it, you knew you should have gone for stitches. But you also knew it was too late for that now.
After a moment of contemplation, you decided to keep Noah in bed with you for the night. You opened up your email one more time with the arrival instructions from Bradley even though you had them memorized. But you didn't want to mess this up. 
When you got to work the next morning, while you were still trying to decide if you should report the break in, another layer of embarrassment was added. Dr. Kelly pulled you aside and glanced down at your hand as she said, "Would you like me to take a look at that?" 
You'd done a pretty terrible job of bandaging it up on your own. "Sure," you said softly, and she unwrapped it and winced.
"This didn't happen at work, did it?"
"No," you replied quickly. "At home."
She met your eyes with startled ones. "This is a nasty, irregular cut. You live with your boyfriend, correct?" When you nodded, she added, "If there's any sort of issue with... violence at home, please know that you can always come to me."
Your jaw dropped open, and you gasped. "No! He's not even here, he's deployed! It was an accident!"
"Okay," she said right away. "I believe you. Let me get it cleaned up. It's looking angry, and you should have probably gone somewhere for stitches over the weekend."
Instead of responding, you silently followed her to one of the exam rooms where she carefully disinfected your palm and applied an adhesive that would work on your skin. "I can reapply it later this week for you."
"Thanks." As you got back to work, you were starting to think you should have reported the incident with the police. Panic rose inside you as you were instructed to prepare some vaccination syringes for the ten year old in exam room five. 
Should you wait until Bradley got home on Wednesday? Should you call the police after work today? Your cut up hand was bad enough, but Noah could have been the one who got hurt. And you'd honestly never be able to forgive yourself if something happened to him. You had protected him from Meredith in the park, so why was this any different?
You rushed back to Bradley's house after work and ran inside, completely exasperated by his old man tendencies. You had to search for the list of phone numbers he gave you which would have been much better if he just saved them to your contacts in your phone.
Noah needed to be picked up in the next forty minutes, and you didn't know how long she would be in her office, but you tried to reach Tracy anyway. When you gave your name to her receptionist, you were shocked that he put you right through to Bradley's lawyer.
"I hope Bradley thanked you for me. The Red Bulls were very sweet of you."
You laughed at Tracy in spite of the fact that you felt like crying. "It's the least I could do." Then you took a deep breath and said, "I was wondering if there is any way you can help me? I don't want to end up with Bradley having to pay you if you give me advice over the phone or anything like that. But I think I need some help right now even though he should be back on Wednesday."
"Your boyfriend basically has me on retainer for you. What do you need?" Tracy asked.
"Retainer?" you asked. No, that couldn't be right.
"I was given explicit instructions to help you with anything you might call about. We're not going to worry about any billing, because he certainly wasn't worried, okay? What can I do for you?"
You sucked in a deep breath as you paced around the kitchen. You felt defeated. That damn USB drive was on top of the refrigerator. The coffee machine you could barely figure out how to use was on the counter. The list of phone numbers in Bradley's handwriting was on the table. So you walked out back and forced yourself to say, "I think Meredith broke into my rental which I had already moved out of. And I saw her at a gas station before that."
There was a long enough pause that you were about to repeat yourself, but then she said, "I think that if she did break into your rental, it was purely out of spite. Because I actually have some news about Meredith that I was waiting to tell Bradley. But I think you and I should have a conversation first, and then you should decide if you want to call the police."
---------------------------
Bradley just wanted to get off this aircraft carrier. He had one night left in this fucking bunk with Carl, and then he could go home to his cozy house and sweet son and your warm, welcoming body. Maybe you'd let him snuggle with you and Noah on the couch, and then after Noah's bedtime, he could take you to bed. He couldn't stop thinking about every single way he wanted to have you. And then he could fall asleep with you wrapped up in his arms and your soft breath on his skin.
He was almost getting hard just thinking about it. It had been a long time since he had someone to come home to, someone who was waiting just for him. He felt like he wanted to reward you for it. God, he wanted to give you everything. He had to tuck his hands up behind his head in his bunk and force himself to try to go to sleep. But he dreamed about your voice and your fingertips on his face.
The following day went quickly as they docked in the afternoon. Once he was able to text you, Bradley was pleased to see that you were more responsive.
I'm docked, Princess. We got in a little early, but I haven't deboarded yet. I know you're at work, but I can't wait to see you whenever you can come pick me up.
My Princess: I'll be there by four with Noah. We missed you so much!
When he was able to finally collect his things and start down the ramp, Bradley's heart was thudding in his ears. It wasn't four o'clock yet, and he knew he might have to wait for you to get there, but then he was pleasantly surprised. As he started walking along the fence to the parking lot, he spotted his Bronco in the last aisle. You had parked it away from everything and everything else, and that brought a smile to his face. 
And then he saw you, carrying Noah and hurrying toward him in your new work scrubs that he hadn't even seen yet. A smile broke out on his face as he rushed to close the distance. "Noah! Princess!"
"Daddy!" Noah squealed with delight, practically jumping from your arms to his. Bradley wrapped Noah up in his right arm and kissed him all over his face, reaching for you at the same time with his free hand. "I love you, Bub. Did you have fun with Princess?"
But you hesitated. And when Bradley met your eyes, he was still reaching for you, but you were only very slowly stepping toward him. "Come here," he rasped, slipping his arm around your waist until you were snug at his side. "I love you." Those words seemed to do the trick as you melted against him, and your chin tipped up as you looked at him.
"I missed you so much," you told him, your voice soft and maybe a little sad? And Bradley kissed you hard and heady in front of everyone including Noah, letting his hand rest on the swell of your butt. He didn't care. You belonged with him. He wanted you there forever. 
But even though you were clinging to his uniform shirt now and returning his kisses with a soft moan, he could tell you were holding back. He trailed a few kisses along your jaw back toward your ear and whispered, "I love you, Baby," and you shivered for him. But when he reached for your hand, he found it was bandaged up. And you looked at him with barely concealed frustration. He could just tell something was wrong. 
"What happened?" he asked, repositioning Noah in his arm and letting his son's cheek rest on his shoulder. He kissed your fingers and ran his thumb along the bandage. "What's wrong with your hand?"
You tried to pull away from him, but he wouldn't let you. "Can we talk about it later? Tonight?"
"Yeah," he agreed, suddenly even more apprehensive. "We can."
"Great," you replied, leading the way to the Bronco with your fingers loosely tangled with his. And while Bradley walked with his lips pressed to his son's forehead and his duffle bag on his back, he was worried about you. 
You were still quiet when the three of you pulled into the driveway and headed inside. "I have a lasagna ready to go in the oven," you told Bradley when he followed you into the kitchen. "Should we start doing your laundry?"
He laughed softly as he put Noah down in one of the chairs and dropped his bag to the floor. "Princess," he whispered, reaching for your soft cheek. "Baby, I don't care about my laundry. I don't even really care about dinner, but I love that you have something ready to go. I just want you to tell me what's bothering you."
He watched you swallow hard, and he thought he saw your eyes dart toward the top of the refrigerator. "Bradley," you muttered.
"You know I thought about you nonstop, right?" he whispered, remembering how it felt to have his fist connect with Carl's face as he made sure he got his polaroid back. "On repeat. I just wanted to be home." He kissed your lips over and over again, stroking your soft skin with his thumb. "So I'll take care of whatever has you upset. You know I will."
You just nodded and let your eyes flutter closed. And all you offered him was one word. "Later."
After dinner was eaten and cleaned up, Bradley spent some extra time giving Noah a bath. The tub was absolutely filled with toys, and Bradley ended up removing his soaking wet undershirt, kneeling on the floor in just his underwear and service khakis. "I missed you so much," he said, kissing his son over and over again. "But I know you had fun with Princess."
Noah held out a green duckie for Bradley to take before he said, "I want Princess to be my mommy." 
Bradley met brown eyes that matched his, and he easily said, "I do too, Bub. She would be really good at it." You already were good at it. But something was wrong, and he needed to figure it out. The two of you weren't acting the way he had hoped you would after being apart for weeks. And now he was questioning whether or not you'd actually want to marry him someday.
It was late. Definitely after Noah's usual bedtime. He was yawning now, but Bradley had been so excited to see him, he let him stay up. With one more big yawn, Bradley scooped his son out of the tub with a towel and drained the water. Then he stopped in the living room where you were sitting on the couch, and he let Noah give you a goodnight kiss. And he leaned down and kissed your cheek as well. "I'll be back out in a minute. We'll talk."
"Okay," you said softly, and then Bradley was thankful that Noah was already falling asleep as soon as he was in bed. On his way back out to the living room, he stopped in the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of merlot and a bag of Skittles he had stashed away. 
After he opened the bottle and took a sip, he met you in the living room. Your gaze took in his naked torso as you bit your lip, and when he handed you the wine with no glass, you took a sip from the bottle as well. 
"Let's talk?" he asked, settling down next to you. He opened the bag of candy and patted his thigh. "And snuggle? I've been saving the wine and Skittles for our reunion, but you'll have to remind me which color goes best with merlot."
He could tell you were trying not to smile as you scooted across the couch and onto his lap while you sipped the wine. "Red, Daddy. Red Skittles pair with merlot."
"Yes," he rasped, kissing the side of your neck. "That's right. Now that I'm all yours again, just like I'm supposed to be, why don't you tell me what's bothering you?"
You handed him the bottle in favor of the candy, and you crunched on a few pieces before you said, "I moved all of my stuff in. And I used your address for my new hire paperwork."
Bradley had to hold back a moan. That sounded so fucking perfect to him, he wanted to take you on the floor right now, right in the middle of the area rug. But instead he just tightened his arm around your waist. "Mmhmm, you know just want to say to make me happy. And you did so great with Noah. I knew you would be perfect, Princess."
But then you met his eyes and held up your bandaged hand. "I had to call Tracy on Monday," you said, and Bradley's heart dropped. 
"Why?"
You pressed your lips together and looked down at the bottle of wine before taking it from his hand and drinking some more. "I saw Meredith at the gas station near Noah's daycare," you whispered, your voice soft and harsh. 
"She broke the restraining order?" he growled. "What the fuck?"
"It was just a gas station," you replied quietly. "And I think she was already there when I pulled in." Bradley was about to rage, but then you kept going. "But then someone broke into my rental, and I cut my hand when Noah was with me. And it must have been Meredith, so I called Tracy, because you weren't here, and I wasn't sure what to do." When you took a deep breath there was a little sob with it that made Bradley clench with the need to protect you. 
"Shit! I wish you didn't have to do this by yourself," he replied, heart skipping faster. "But I'm proud of you. What did Tracy say about Meredith?"
"She helped me file a police report, and they said they are looking for evidence, but my landlord is pissed off that the window is broken. He was supposed to have a new renter move in this week, and he's threatening me about paying for another month. He told me to fix the glass, but the police won't even let me. And you and I are supposed to go meet up with Tracy tomorrow." You hiccupped when you finished talking. 
"Shh," Bradley said, setting the bottle down on the end table and pulling you to his body so your cheek came to rest on his chest. "Baby, I'll take care of it. But back up, and go slow. Did Meredith threaten you or Noah?"
You shrugged against his body, and Bradley focused on every single word you had to say about the gas station and your broken windowpane and the note that was left. And how the police and Tracy both agreed that there's probably not enough evidence to prove anything one way or the other. And then you seemed wrung out as a tear slid down your cheek when you said, "Tracy did tell me that Meredith was on trial for the fraud charges I brought up against her during the custody hearing. When I saw her at the gas station, she told me I ruined her life. And then my window was smashed, probably just because she's such a horrible bitch."
"Make sense," he mumbled against your hair. No wonder he had several unread emails from Tracy that he knew he still needed to go through. Shit. You'd dealt with an awful lot in his absence. He wondered if that meant Meredith was being sentenced. "And we have an appointment with Tracy tomorrow?"
"Yes," you whispered, curling up tighter against his body. "During my lunch break."
"Okay." He kissed your forehead and ran his hands up and down your back. "I'm still off tomorrow. I'll drop you off at work in the morning, and then I'll come back for you whenever you want. And we'll go talk to Tracy, and I promise you, I will take care of everything." You were practically shaking as he added, "Because you take care of us."
You were nodding as you finally looked up at him, and as angry as Bradley was about more bullshit from Meredith, you and Noah were safe. And Tracy would probably have more information for him tomorrow. But right now, you needed someone to take care of you for a minute. "I love you," he promised, considering how exhausted you looked. "Let's take a shower and get in bed?"
Whether you were nodding in agreement or because you were still shaky, Bradley wasn't sure. But he carried you into the bathroom and set you down gently as he turned the shower on. Once you were undressed he helped you in and carefully unwrapped the bandage on your hand. There was a jagged cut on your palm that made his heart lurch. "I'll clean it and rebandage it, Princess," he said, trying to hide the anger in his voice. You didn't deserve any of the shit you'd repeatedly gone through since you met him.
"Okay," you whispered, and as soon as he was out of his khakis and underwear, you were pulling him in with you. Bradley was helpless in his feelings for you. Very carefully, he took his time and washed you so you didn't irritate your cut further. And he let himself just enjoy the feel of your body against his as he gently held your hand.
When he turned the shower off, he wrapped you in a towel and carried you to the bedroom. Everything looked exactly as it should: your purple crown was on his bedpost, everything was tidy, and the bed looked inviting. But you still didn't look relaxed as he helped you into his gray sweatpants and a soft undershirt before bandaging your hand again.
"What will make you feel better?" he asked, pulling on clean underwear as you climbed into bed. "Tell me, and I'll do it. I just want you to know how much I missed you and how happy I am that you moved all your stuff in while I was away."
You peeled the blanket back on his side of the bed and whispered, "Snuggle with me?" 
You looked so perfect and innocent, and Bradley slid in bed with you and collected you in his arms. "Come here, Baby. Let me tell you how much I love you."
----------------------------
You started to fall asleep in Bradley's arms while he rubbed small circles on your back through his undershirt which you were wearing. You had been on the brink of erupting into tears all night, and you hadn't even mentioned the USB drive. And now that he was home, you didn't know if you were strong enough to bring it up at all. 
If he knew it was in that box in the attic, then you were going to make a fool of yourself. And if he forgot about its existence, he was going to think you were snooping through his things even though he gave you permission to use the attic. Either way, you weren't going to mention it, at least not yet. 
There were too many other things to think about anyway. Like whether or not the police found anything in your rental. And how you were going to fix the window. And if Meredith was actually going to attempt something with you or Noah, or if she was just bitter that she might be facing jail time. 
"Daddy," you whispered, and Bradley's arm tightened around you as he kissed the top of your head.
"Just sleep, Baby. I'll be right here."
As you dozed off, you realized you didn't have to be on full alert at the moment. For the first night in so long, you could just sleep and know he was with you and Noah. And then you were out. 
Next thing you knew, it was light inside the bedroom, and Bradley was waking you up with gentle kisses on your face. You reached for him, and then his body weight was on top of you as he chuckled. "Baby, we'll be late."
"Good, I want to stay in bed all day," you whined, but soon you were dressed in your scrubs and making breakfast while Bradley got Noah ready for daycare. You hated the way you felt like you were holding back being as physical as you wanted to be with your boyfriend. 
And then a flash of panic shot through you. He must have been expecting you to have sex with him last night, when instead you fell asleep as a bundle of nerves. You were still a bundle of nerves, but now you felt like crying as well. But he was acting so normal when he brought Noah into the kitchen to eat pancakes. "Just leave the mess in the sink, and I'll take care of it later," he said casually, reaching for your good hand to give you another kiss. 
But you were thinking about the USB drive, and your meeting with Tracy and your job. And you barely kissed him back this time. "Okay," you agreed before picking at your breakfast. 
Bradley looked concerned now, and he continued to look concerned a little later as he pulled into Noah's daycare parking lot. "I can take him in," you muttered, but he had already turned off the Bronco's engine. 
"Let's go together," he replied, eyeing you skeptically as he climbed out to get Noah. And when you were walking in, side by side, Bradley asked, "Will you tell me what else is on your mind?"
You just shook your head, because you didn't want to get into this right now. But he took your hand anyway.  And of course the same girl was working at the front desk with her clipboard. 
"Lieutenant Bradshaw! Good morning!"
"Hi, Casey," he replied smoothly, his fingers laced with yours. 
"How was your deployment? We really missed you here." She gave you some serious side eye, and you just knew she wished you weren't even around.
"It was fine," he replied, setting Noah down and kissing him. And then Noah turned to you for a hug before he walked back to the playroom. Then Bradley tugged you a little closer to him and wrapped his arm around you before signing the clipboard with the back of your body snug up against the front of his. He kissed your neck while Casey watched. "Let's go before you're late for work, Princess," he whispered next to your ear. 
He handed the clipboard to Casey without even looking at her, and you were so mixed up inside, you wanted to scream. Five minutes ago, you were dreading the idea of being intimate with Bradley without showing him the USB drive first, and now you wanted to fuck him in the front seat of the Bronco.
"Listen," he said, voice stern as he pulled out into traffic and headed toward your medical complex. "Something is bugging you. I want you to be honest with me. After we talk to Tracy together, you and I are having a conversation later today. And by the end of that conversation, I want you and I to feel the way we are supposed to feel again. Because you moved all your stuff into the house, which I think is us officially taking the next step in our relationship. And I'm used to feeling comfortable when I'm with you. Okay?"
You pressed your lips together. There was no getting around it now. "Yes."
-----------------------------
"I really like Tracy and all, but I was hoping I'd never have to come here again," Bradley said as you and he rode the elevator up to her office. 
"I'm sorry," you whispered, running your hands down the front of your now wrinkly scrubs. "It's probably my fault."
Bradley did a double take. "Your fault? How would this possibly be your fault, Baby?"
You sighed and exited the elevator, and Bradley just wanted you to look happy again. "Because I'm the one who mentioned all of Meredith's insider trading and shady deals in the first place."
"Hey," he said, leading you down the hallway with his hand at your back. "This is one hundred percent Meredith's fault. And the fraud charges were probably coming whether or not we said anything about it during the custody hearing."
Then Tracy's receptionist was waving the two of you past his desk without question, and Bradley thought that was either a very good or a very bad sign.
"Meredith is in custody," Tracy announced as soon as her office door was closed behind Bradley. 
You gasped and said, "She's in prison."
"Yes. Now have a seat," she replied, pointing to the small conference table. "Because we have some things to discuss. Welcome home, Bradley." Then she set down a copy of Meredith's mugshot and arrest information.
"What a warm welcome," he muttered, skimming the paperwork. "She turned herself in?"
"She did," Tracy told him, taking the empty seat across the table and cracking open a Red Bull. "Probably broke the window at your place for fun as her last hurrah before turning herself in."
"Did the police find anything?" you asked her. "My landlord is so mad about the window."
Tracy just kind of shrugged. "Like I told you before, it's probably a lost cause. Nobody picked anything up on a doorbell camera, and it's impossible to tell exactly when it happened since you haven't actually been living there for a few months." You nodded, and then Tracy asked, "But if they do find evidence, would you like to press charges?"
"No," you replied immediately, and Bradley leaned in a little closer.
"Are you sure? We can absolutely press charges if you want to."
"Come on, Bradley," you said quietly, even though Tracy could still hear. "I don't want to cost you any more money. And I can't afford Tracy on my own." 
You looked at him with pleading eyes, and he leaned in even closer to you. How many times had the two of you had this fucking conversation? Too many for him to keep track of, and it annoyed him every single time. "Look at me," he whispered when you started to turn away. As soon as you met his eyes again, he kissed you softly. But his voice was rough around the edges as he said, "I would defend you with my life. Why would my money be any different? Why is that the thing that is always too much for you?"
With a soft gasp, you gaped at him. "Your life?"
"Yes, of course," he said, brow furrowed. "So I really need you to stop making a fuss about everything else. Because it doesn't matter compared to you. Or compared to Noah. Or compared to us. And I'm getting pretty fucking sick of having this conversation over and over again with you."
"Bradley," you whispered, wrapping your arms around his neck. He chanced a glance at Tracy, but she was simply scrolling on her phone now. And he could hear tears in your voice as you said, "Money isn't as important as you either."
"Exactly," he growled, holding you tight. "Fuck, Princess... don't cry. I didn't mean to make you cry. I'm sorry. But if you want to press charges, if there's even a reason to press charges, I will gladly pay for Tracy. She's expensive as hell, because she's very good."
"That's right," Tracy murmured, still scrolling.
You pulled away from him and kissed his scarred cheek a few times before you said, "Can I think about it? I mean, Meredith was probably just acting like a petty bitch because she could."
"We can wait for a police report," Tracy supplied, setting down her phone. "And I can get more information about Meredith as well."
You nodded and looked up at Bradley. "That's what I want to do."
"Then that's what we'll do," he agreed right away. 
"Tracy, do you know when I'll be able to replace the window? My landlord is threatening me with another month of rent."
She just snorted. "Send me a copy of your lease agreement. I'll make him cry."
When the three of you stood, Bradley could tell you seemed more relaxed, and he kissed the now dry tears from your cheek. "How much do I owe you for today?" Bradley asked Tracy as he took your bandaged hand in his.
"No worries. I'll bill you."
"Worth every cent," Bradley told you once again as you rode the elevator back down. 
You had your head resting on his chest as you pulled out your phone, and he could see your screen as you said, "Dr. Kelly texted me. She told me to just take the rest of the afternoon for myself."
"Do you want to head home?" he asked as you tucked your phone away again.
"Yeah, I'll make us lunch."
"Perfect," he replied. "And then we can talk."
And you seemed fine on the way home, changing radio stations in the Bonco and talking about how you hoped Meredith would have to serve the full fifteen years she was being threatened with. Bradley didn't really give much of a fuck about Meredith as long as you felt safe and happy. As long as things went back to normal for the three of you. 
But as soon as you walked into the kitchen, you seemed apprehensive once again. He watched you carefully get some butter and cheese out of the refrigerator, claiming you were in the mood for a grilled cheese sandwich. But then you tossed everything onto the counter and spun to face him. 
"I can't take it any more, okay?" You were nearly shouting at him, fists clenched at your sides. Your pretty face was all pinched like you were in pain. 
"What?" Bradley asked, rushing to you. "What's wrong?" And then he saw one rogue tear streak down your cheek. Something was making you cry again, and he needed to know what it was. 
"She's so many things that I know are horrible, but she's also so many things that I wish I could be... but I'm just not." You took a deep breath and reached up on your tiptoes to take something down from the top of the refrigerator. "I just want to know why it's here, okay?" you asked him, your hands shaking as you reached out with a blue USB drive on your bandaged palm. "Just don't lie to me about why you have this, Bradley. I know it's a few years old, but I just don't understand why you had it in the attic with Noah's baby clothes."
He took it in his own hand, and it seemed familiar. When he looked up and met your eyes, you were crying and trying to swipe the tears away. "I'm confused..." 
You pointed at his laptop which was charging on the table, and said, "Just tell me the truth," as you sobbed. 
Bradley opened the computer and tried to keep a wary eye on you at the same time. But as soon as he inserted the USB drive and the folder automatically opened up, he heard you softly say, "I can't," before you rushed out of the room. 
He was still baffled as he tapped on the video thumbnail. And then he wanted to throw the computer across the room. His blood ran cold as he remembered making this video. The details were hazy, but when he heard himself tell Meredith that he loved her, he wrenched the drive back out of the laptop and heard it clatter across the floor as he ran after you.
"Princess!"
----------------------------
Fix it now, Daddy!! You better fix it! I hope you enjoy your babysitter story @beyondthesefourwalls and thank you @mak-32
PART 33
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box-milk · 28 days
Text
I'm not looking for forgiveness
Pairings~ Maria Leon x older sister! Reader
Genre ~ Angst
Warnings~ mentions pass substance abuse and character death, short and all over the place.
Disclaimer~ I'm not sure if mapi has any siblings as I'm still new to the football world but for the sake of this we'll pretend she doesn't .
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"Mapi please listen to me".
"Y/n believe me when I say I don't want anything to do with you after what you put our family through for 3 years."
The disconnection tone, as well as a lifetime of regret, rang in your ear. You knew your sister's anger was warranted for the lifetime of trauma you put her through.
Mapi was just a teenager when she watched you throw your life away to drugs and alcohol and despite her age, she was the only one in your corner when your parents' inevitability gave up on you. Almost debilitated trying to keep you a float while also pursuing foot.
Even after her big break with FC barcelona, Mapi poured her heart and soul into helping you overcome your obsession, going as far as to pay for therapy, rehad sessions and support programs despite her parents fair warning which she soon regretted when she found out that money was been invested to fuel your addiction.
Completely gutted, she confronted you, but high off your ass you just disregarded her efforts laughing in her face, repeating the ditty as everyone else.
"You can't help someone that doesn't want it mapi."
And that was enough for her to complete leave you to your own demise while painful she had no choice but to harden her heart when it came to you.
°•°•°°•°•°•°°°•°
You're well aware of your sister's feelings, hell your family's feelings towards you, but seeing your sister at least was something that you had to do. You owed her that, at least. So you waited patiently in the parking lot of camp nou waiting for your sister to be done with training.
You sat a while in the blazing sun until you saw the heavily tattooed defender making her way over to her car, which you sat in front of when she's see you her smile immediately melts and her face hardens.
"I told you I dont want to speak to you cause if you're looking for cash for your next fix, forget it."
You shiver lightly at the cold tone, but you knew you deserved it. "I don't need money, maria, it's just something really important i have to tell you."
"Well, save it cause I really don't care."
"I'm dying, maria." You said softly, hoping there was a better way to say it, but when you saw that she would have left without hearing you out, you settled for the raw truth.
"What?"
"I'm dying, and I don't want money or anything just to let you know"
You've never seen so many emotions flash on mapi's face before, and you knew immediately which one it would settle on and braced yourself for what's to come.
"What do you expect you do drugs for half your life and wasted the help I tried to give when nobody else would. Did you think this wouldn't happen?This is your karma y/n, and I hope you take it well cause I've run out of sympathy to give."
The harsh words stung yes, but you took it with a smile and that only added fuel to an already burning fire mapi continued to berate you, and you did nothing but take it on the chin reaching into your backpack pulling out a crumble envelope waiting for her to get everything off her chest.
When you felt it safe to extended your hand with the envelope, hoping she'd take it, which she did before crumbing it up and tossing it to the ground but pushing your body down aswell.
"I hate you with my entire being y/n, and I'm glad I'll permanently be rid of you. Have a good what's left of your pathetic life."
You pick yourself up shakily, watching as mapi's car quickly left the lot before picking up the letter and straightening it out, willing yourself not to cry cause in your heart you knew mapi was right. This is your karma.
°•°•°•°•°•°
Ingrid eyebrows furrowed in confusion when she gathered the mail the next day and saw the crumpled looking envelope she wanted to question her girlfriend about it, but she was out with alexia for the day.
So besides herself, she gently opened the envelope to see a letter written gracefully in cursive before reading and coming to two conclusions. mapi has a sister, and that sister is dying.
When mapi came home that afternoon, she found her girlfriend sitting while reading from a piece of paper that was quickly pushed to her chest wordlessly when ingrid realised she was back.
The shorter of the two brought the paper within eyesight in confusion before she recognised the handwriting and scoff but reading regardless.
Dear Maria,
I understand that I haven't been the best person in the world to our family and to you specifically, but I just needed you to know how sorry I am. I've been sorry for a while now long before I knew what my faith was. I spent months trying to figure out how I would prove to you how sorry I am, but I saw the life you built for yourself and figured it was best if I stayed away knowing how poisonous I can be. I'm sorry map's I really am I wish I would have taken the time when I had it to let you know but that's not the case. I'm in no way asking for your forgiveness. I don't deserve it. I just wanted you to know that you're 100% free of me and you'll do great things my little star and I'm forever thankful and proud of you.
A loving goodbye,
Y/n Leon."
○●○●○●○●○
An: this was sloppy but I kinda like it.
317 notes · View notes
kurogane2512 · 8 months
Note
On my knees begging for how genshin women (yae, ei, signora) would react to their girlfriend slipping up and accidentally calling them mommy (nsfw)
This was so fun to write I love it
18+ CONTENT MDNI
Game: Genshin Impact
Characters: Raiden Ei, Yae Miko, La Signora x fem!reader (separate)
Type: Smut and Fluff (calling them mommy, fingering, strap usage, edging, overstimulation, grinding)
Raiden Ei
Genuinely, I believe she wouldn't get the innuendo behind it at first. Don't blame the poor Archon she had been in isolation for centuries and is still learning modern ways. The first time you utter it, she'll be confused as to why you called her your mother then sweetly forgive you. It won't be until Yae tells her the real meaning that she truly wants to hear it again
A pleasant and serene evening at Inazuma, you were cradled against you lover at Tenshukaku, blissfully enjoying each other's presence and comfort. Well, perhaps you liked it a bit too much...
"Mm...mommy~" you whispered against Ei's neck in a daze, making her confused. She watched your cheeks turn red as you opened your eyes and looked at her in embarrassment, she simply chuckled looking at you and patted your head.
"Hehe, I'm not your mother, Y/n~"
"S-Sorry, I didn't mean it..."
"It's alright. I'm glad to know you feel so relaxed with me."
You felt relieved inside as you saw that she didn't understand the meaning, nodding at her with a smile and continuing to cuddle. The next day, the Archon was seated at the Grand Narukami Shrine with her Kitsune familiar, sharing some dango and a cup of tea.
"How are things going with Y/n?" Yae asked.
"Oh, everything is good. Haha, that reminds me of an interesting occurrence from yesterday~"
"Oh? Care to share?~"
"Hehe, she accidentally called me her mother yesterday. It was rather cute; she became really embarrassed after~"
Yae looked at her wide-eyed before smirking and leaning closer, "What did she say exactly? What were you both doing?"
"We were just....cuddling like normal and she happened to utter 'mommy'. I think she simply felt really relaxed."
Yae's smirk widened and she raised her eyebrow before chuckling, "Oh, Ei. Now I feel bad for poor Y/n~"
Ei looked at her friend confused before Yae proceeded bring a novel from her publishing house and handed it to Ei with a particular page open. Ei's brows furrowed before she accepted and read the contents of the book, Yae watched her in amusement as Ei's face turned redder reading each paragraph.
"T-This is....are you sure she meant this, Miko?"
"Hehe~ Why don't you find out?~"
The following evening, the two of you were entangled in each other at Ei's private chamber. Her kimono hung low exposing her breasts while you kissed her neck and made your way down her body. She remembered Yae's words then suddenly held your head and pulled you up before pecking your lips.
"Y/n, I wanted to ask something...."
You smiled and gently embraced her by snuggling into her neck, "Go ahead."
"Yesterday....when you....c-called me mommy, did you mean something....specific?"
You swiftly looked at her out of embarrassment, "W-What do you mean?"
"W-Well, I read it in a novel....certain ways of referring to your partner in some kind of roleplay or simply preference...."
"I....I-I'm sorry if it made you uncomfortable. I d-didn't—"
"No, I didn't hate it! In fact, if you want to call me that then I don't mind...."
Looking at each other flustered, you slowly nodded and rested your head in her soft bosom before beginning to rut against her. She let out low moans as her legs wrapped around your waist and held you tightly while you continued rubbing your clit with hers.
"Mommy....mommy....i-it feels so good...."
A warm feeling evoked in Ei's chest hearing your needy moans, "You are doing so well....mhm~ M-My baby....that's it....cum for your mommy~"
You slowly let go of your restraints and rutted faster, pressing your cores together and grinding hard. Soft moans and whimpers filled the room, affectionate names spilling from your lips.
"Mommy....I want to c-cum...cum with me...."
"D-Do it, my darling....make your mommy cum~"
You hissed as she rutted her hips into you before you quickened your pace as well, desperately rubbing against each other. You moaned loudly and pressed your cunts together as you came, her own release following after making your juices mix. You panted out and gazed at each other before sharing a passionate kiss.
Yae Miko
You just know she will tease you about it and make you say it again and again. She will be slightly surprised the first time you say it but quickly accept the new title, will definitely tease you about it in public and make you scream it in private.
Late night at the Grand Narukami Shrine, you were visiting your girlfriend when the two of you returned to her quarters and engaged in passionate lovemaking. It eventually led to her pinning you on the bed and pounding into your wet cunt with her strap.
"Ah~ Ah~ M-Miko....please....s-slow down! I can't anymore!~"
"Oh, you can, little one~ Come now, give me your cute reactions~"
Yae smirked as she gazed at your fucked out state, you had lost count of how many orgasms she drew from you but she wasn't stopping. Your legs felt sort and your walls continued to spasm from your previous release, yet looking at the Guuji above you and realizing she was your girlfriend never failed to make you want it more.
"Aahn~ Mommy....m-more!~"
Your eyes snapped open at your surprising words, Yae's thrusts also slowed for a moment hearing them. But before you could speak anything else, she was pounding into you even harder.
"Oh my~ My little one is quite dirty-minded it seems. I wonder....hah...i-if you read some novels from my collection?~"
"N-No! I didn't— Aah!~"
"Hehe~ How shameful. Looks like your mommy has to correct your sinful ways now~"
She flipped you making you lie on your stomach all of a sudden before thrusting her cock again. Your voice cried out and she slammed her hips faster now, your skin slapping against each other.
"P-Please....no more! Aah~ M-Miko—"
"Oh, that's not the correct word, my sweetheart. Don't make your mommy remind you again~"
You pursed your lips before giving in to your desires, "M-Mommy!~ Please....I'm cumming....please mommy!~"
"Good girl~ Leave everything to your mommy~"
Yes, she loves it a little too much.
La Signora
She will be shocked hearing it at first, she can't believe you see her that way. But she loves it so much, she definitely wants to hear it more. But she won't give in so easily, she'll mock and tease you about it all the while keeping you on the edge. Will start with degradation then slowly turn to praises as she fully accepts it. In the end, she will genuinely wonder if you see her that way and why- a sign of her insecurity, and you have to tell her she's perfect for it~ (personally I see her more of a mistress person btw but mmm mommy has my bias for sure).
After a stressful day filled with meetings and headaches from her colleagues, the Fair Lady just wants to confide in her office with you in her arms. She immediately grabbed you the moment she entered her office and pushed you on the table before beginning to kiss you all over.
She's all over you, trapping your figure between herself and the table. Her lips make desperate kisses on your face, her knee nestled between your legs and rubbing your core. You know she's doing it intentionally, but you can't do anything until she starts touching you herself. She's taking her time, relishing your lips and body first.
Her hands unbutton your shirt and pulls it down to expose your neck and chest, she immediately dives in to make her marks on you. She comes closer and hikes her leg up, earning a stifled moan from you due to the stimulation. She smirks to herself feeling your wetness seep on her knee and licks your ear before whispering, "Already so wet. Are you that desperate to be touched?~"
"Y-Yes....please...."
"Please what? You have to do better than that~"
"P-Please....touch me....mhm~"
"Are you really giving me an order? Do I have to teach you your place?~"
She's making you restless now, you can't take it anymore.
"P-Please mommy! Please touch me!~"
She suddenly stops all her movements; did she hear you right? Did you really just say that? It's amusing to her, but also slightly embarrassing.
"You..." she leans away to look at your face before smirking and grabbing your jaw, "What a shameful way to address your superior~"
Her other hand slips past your underwear and touches your clit, a surprised gasp leaving you as you hold on to her.
"Do I really have to teach you basic manners again, hm?~"
She circles your clit in slow motions, making you more desperate as juices keep spilling from your cunt.
"P-Please....more...m-mommy....ngh!~"
She's surprised once again and leans in to bite your neck, "Not stopping, are you? Do you want to be punished that badly?~"
"....Y-Yes....mommy....punish me~"
Oh, you have done it now. She swiftly turns you over and pushes you against the desk as she leans on your back and her hand dips inside your underwear again. Her body presses against you, back arching into her but she keeps you pinned as she fingers you. Your walls clench around her fingers, spasming as she scissors them and thrusts in and out.
"Didn't think my best and brightest would stoop to such a level. But I can't deny this state of yours is quite tempting. Go on, cum for your mommy~"
Her sultry seductive voice whispers in your ear before she licks your lobe making your walls clench more as you unexpectedly release, your cum coating her fingers. As you calm down and begin to look back at her, you see a surprising look on her face. Her usual confident smirk is gone, her eye softens and she looks almost guilty.
"R-Rosa? Are you okay?"
"Y/n....did you really mean it? What you called me just now, do you really see me that way?"
You are surprised at her question but soon realize why she's asking this; after all, she's only ever been known as a witch.
"Yes....I do. I....I love you and....y-you treat me with so much love and care....I c-can't help but see you that way....U-Unless you find it uncomfortable then—"
She kisses you before you can finish, "No...it's okay, I'm fine with it. You can use it more...."
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