#singleparenthood

[drollonamusicbox]

Last night I was talking to Marlowe about why sometimes my phone makes me cry. We spoke about Palestine, she listened, then left. But almost immediately came back to ask me how to spell "peace." I think I found what she was working on.

#palestine #ceasefire #singleparenthood

[lotsofpeyt]

Any woman can be a mother, But it takes a Bad- Ass Mom to be a dad too...

#singleparenthood #what if #coffeelover

[murphycares]

#fitness #singleparenthood #us army #us air force

[thisisshani]

Tell me the pros and cons of being a single parent by choice

#singleparenthood #singlemum #iui treatment #future planning

[singlemomsearching]

Hello☺️

#hellofrom #hellofebruary #valentines #fashion #single #singleparenthood #singleparentlife

[kerice]

Posting my past journals

FRIDAY, DECEMBER 19, 2008

The Christmas Season

Love Christmas, always have but my role as a mom makes the season a bit hectic. I need to have some time of reflection but it can be difficult. I'll be lucky if I get my Christmas cards out by New Year's ;) I started a new job, one that may be temporary since the pay is terrible and the hours go well into the night. It's a job though and I can still count my blessings.

Since I have a December birthday, one of the things I've enjoyed doing is making Christmas cookies with my kids and nieces and nephews. Its become an annual tradition that warms my heart.

I'm happy my kids are growing up with their cousins. It's fun to make childhood memories that are positive and carefree.

Merry Christmas and happy holidays!

#holidaybaking #cookies decorating #family #singleparenthood #nightjob #empower #motivation #memories #healing #dvsurvivor #mentalhealth

[justice4ayrton8gabrielleabreu]

April 2015, Ayrton and Gabrielle are having plenty of fun celebrating Daddy Gorilla Dumdum's birthday at Randfarm Park today. Ayrton also learns from #daddygorilladumdum, how to pronounce his sisters name properly instead of calling her "Amele", a significant milestone for him... 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 #birthday #singleparent #humanrights #parentalalienation

#birthday #parentalalienation #human rights #singleparenthood

[moniqueyelias]

#home #stayathome #stayathomeda #dad #singledad #lifewithkids #family #familyblogger #fatherhood #father #dadblogger #familylife #single parents #singleparentlife #singleparenthood

[singlemums-supportsystem-blog]

The Choice

From the age of 20 I knew I wanted to be a mum. At the time I didn’t really think of the logistics, I imagined my life would go as it did for my parents. Fall in love, get married and have some kids. 

But at 22 I had been single for a number of years and didn’t really know about meeting someone. The bodily desire to have a baby was quite intense during these years and I started to consider becoming a single parent a few years down the line.

I know 22 is quite young to be thinking of these things, but I already had a well paid, stable job and had been self reliant for many years. I knew at the time I was in absolutely no position emotionally to have a baby but I was just considering it for the future. My mum was around 27 when she had me and this has worked well for our relationship. School friends whose parents were older often found it hard to talk to or relate to their parents, something I never had trouble with. 

I knew I wanted to be a fairly young mum, especially if I was going to do it alone. The older you get, the more difficult it can be and the more strain it can put on your mind and body. (Not in every situation, I understand). So I decided that I would follow the similar age gap that my mum and I have, aiming to have a baby by 27. This of course left me 5 years at the time to build up savings, climb the job ladder and look into buying a property. 

Shortly after deciding this, I moved jobs and met the love of my life. . . Typical :)

Slowly the idea of being a single parent drifted to the back of my mind. We talked about buying a home together, what we would name our kids and all round just planning for the future. He owned his own place and I moved in after dating for a year. I was open about my dreams of motherhood from the start, however as time went on, the more closed he became when I was talking about the future. We sat down one night and he told me that he wasn’t sure if he wanted to be a dad or not. He asked for 6 months so that he could work out what he wanted from life. During those 6 months I tired my best not to bring up babies and even tried to figure out why I wanted to become a parent. Did I really want a child? Was it just a phase I was going through? Could I make that sacrifice? Should I stay with him and not be a mum or leave the best man I had met for a future I didn’t know was certain? 

It was a very difficult time. I decided at the time that I wouldn’t give up something as certain as my love for him, for a future that was so uncertain. I didn’t know I could even have children. 

I was feeling okay about my choice until we received some news. His brother’s wife was pregnant. As soon as the words entered my ears I broke. Looking back, I had been trying to convince myself that being childless would be fine, as long as we had each other. I knew I was lying to myself and it felt terrible knowing what the outcome might be.

When the 6 months had passed, I knew he was still not ready to make a choice. I turned 25 the month after and it dawned on me that I was getting close to my (loose) deadline of 27. I asked him for an answer by the end of that month and we decided to part ways. Not out of hatred, we didn’t fall out of love or fall in love with other people. We simply wanted different things in life. We were both strong enough and loved each other enough to want what was best for the other. He knew he could never give me the life that I wanted and I knew the life I wanted wasn’t for him.

(Side note - He is and will always be a close friend. We love each other dearly but have transitioned to just friends)

So I found myself back on the single parent pathway and once again sat down with myself to work out if this is what I want and is it something I can do. Financially I am in a very good position and I am just about to buy my first home. These are things I knew I would need to have in place before starting the process of getting pregnant. 

So why did I choose to do this alone rather than wait to find another potential partner? To start, I am not ready to move on. While my break-up was clean and very peaceful, it has still left a hole in my life that I am not ready to fill. Timing is also a big consideration. I know that age is still on my side but giving myself a year of being single, then another two or three getting into a new relationship and sorting all those potential feelings out leaves me at or close to 30. I am also aware that I could have the same thing happen, where after a few years we part ways and I am back to ground zero on my own, only its 5 years down the line. 

By that point I would likely be 31 or 32 by the time a baby came about (if all went well). And, while this is not old (by far), in terms of how I would like to lead my life, this is not what I want. I want to stick to my plan but I also know that could change at any moment because life is unpredictable. I am not closed to meeting someone forever, I just want to move forward with some clarity and definition to my life.

So knowing that I want to start the journey is one thing, actually moving forward is another thing. From here I’ll start detailing all my thoughts and what I go through on my journey to being a parent. I’d love to hear the journeys that others have taken.

I am not writing this to offend anyone, only to open up to conversation and show other people that perhaps others are going through the same thing. We can all help each other out, rather than judge and criticise.

#opendiscussion #singlemum #singlemumjourney #lifechoices #singleparent #singleparenthood #singlemumbychoice #singleparentsupport #singlemumsupport #singlemom #openminded #support and love

[singlemamachronicle]

Then There Were Two

For 11 years, I managed to be a single mom. The kids and I did everything together. We made it work somehow - I had to since it was just me and them. When they got a little older, and once we had moved out of my mother’s house, they’d go and spend the night and FB memories often reminds me of how lonely I’d feel because my whole life revolved around them. 

Often times when having to explain myself on why the kids father was not around or why they didn’t interact with his family, I’d tell them the truth: they never came around. Does anyone honestly think that if given the opportunity to have time to do homework, study, or simply have time to myself I would’ve turned it down? Then the kids got older, behavioral and emotional challenges began to show and I made the decision that if they wanted to come around we’d do things on my terms - with mediation and supervised visits. As my luck would have it - they tried but when I presented my conditions I was told I was crazy and doing the most. So, I moved on with my most-doing self.

Over the years they’ve come and gone, but never really come to me as I have always been an after thought and never given the respect of the parent I am to these two children. As I’ve been able to address my trauma, abuse, and anger caused by these people, I tried really hard to separate my own shit with what my kids deserved (spoiler: it is not easy). I am human after all and I make mistakes and this is one area that I probably will never be able to fix in my lifetime.

I’ve been open about the challenges we’ve faced over the past year. In her own journey, Gina’s decided that she herself has to find out what this family holds for her, well, because parents don’t know anything and I was doing the most. My heart is shattered and I’m struggling to understand that no matter what I did, this was inevitable. I don’t think I can make rhyme or reason of this, and no amounts of it’s going to be makes me feel ok at the moment. I’m genuinely struggling, sleep is almost nonexistent and having to remind myself to be patient is exhausting. In my knowledge of personal progress, I can feel myself regressing to being 18, being made fun and gaslighted by this family. Acknowledging these feelings and putting them out and not just letting them sit in my journal is yet another form of self-care and therapy that I am hoping and praying will finally start to help. For now, I know that I’ve got another kid who still thinks the world of me and who will hold my hand and assure me we’ll be alright.

#parenting #singleparenthood #trauma #moving on #progress #mental health

[torimichelletalks]

First Marriage, Second Thoughts...

Now where was I...Oh yea, realizing that I had lost who I thought I was. Now, as I stated before, we were definitely trying our best to rekindle the fire that had dimmed after 3-4 years. But what was revealed to me today was- Just because it’s your plan, doesn’t mean it’s God’s plan and if it isn’t HIS plan then it will surely fail! Something that I will NOW tell myself every single day. Anyway, the fire had been rekindled but it was a temporary solution. You know what I mean, like applying pressure until you can find a band-aid? Yea, that’s exactly what it was.

So we were walking on eggshells. Tiptoeing around the “D” word. It was almost like we both knew it was coming but neither one of us wanted to say it. We both came from single parent homes, vowed that we would never raise our children this way, so if the “D” word came into play, are we failing? Are we just like every generation before us? These are the questions that kept two people in a situation that shouldn’t have been. We were literally co-parenting roommates.

Let’s take a look at that. We could have and should have called it quits, when we first realized but as many married couples do... you stay married for the sake of...children?...finances?...appearance? But you never stop to think, what is this actually doing to my mental health? What is this doing to my children? To the people around me? We often think we are the only ones impacted- if we divorce but SOOOOO many people are impacted when you stay together and are not meant to be.

I realized that when the “D” word was actually said and the papers were filed, I had to be selfish in a certain aspect. I had to protect myself which would ultimately protect my children. Do not be afraid to walk away for yourself. This is for any situation that is draining and disturbing your peace. If you value anything, VALUE YOU!! Did I know what I was walking into? HELL NO! But I did know that I was walking away from a place where I could no longer be. So I did it. I ended my marriage, ended the confusion, ended the hurt and anger and walked into my new life. “Hello, single parenthood, my name is LaToria Michelle, pleased to meet you.”

Be Blessed and Love Yourself <3

-ToriMichelle

#newblogger #toritalks #ToriMichelleTalks #aspriringwriter #selfcare #vablogger #firstmarriage #secondthoughts #piecesofme #divorce #singleparenthood

[affirmedvisionary]

Single handily need uniform for 3 plus 4 outfits for a funeral, rent n food in the middle of summer with no headspace & no childfree hours 🤦🏾‍♀️ what do you sell/offer to raise some money??

#motherhood #affirmedvisionary #charsvisionarys #entrpreneurship #entreprenuerlife #entrepreneur #the strugge is real #struggles #singleparenthood #singleparent #backtoschool #uniform #fundraising #someone help

[supermomjoanna-blog]

I found a couple of these strange things hanging around Jacob (my 13 year old sons) room when I was cleaning it today?? Does anyone have an idea what they are. Are they some sort of new electronic or some toy???

#mommylife #mommyblogger #mombloglove #momblogger #momblr #mommy #mom #singleparentlife #singlemom #singleparenthood #parenting #advice #dank memes #dank

[herblcksociety]

Letting go

Letting go is sometimes the hardest thing to do. You know you have to do it but you don’t want to feel the pain or do the work that it entails. It has been 2 years and 2 months since I have been intimate with someone other than Neivs’ dad. I have turned down more dates because I don’t desire to be with someone. Yes, there are days where I miss Chris... I miss his smile, his laughter, our conversations.  We were a true adventure. I wish he knew how smart and beautiful his daughter is. I pray for him everyday...I pray that he is doing good, happy, and will have a connection with his daughter someday. 

I pray that as I continue to heal and grow, that God continues to free and open my soul again. 

#soutties #singleparenthood

[kerice]

Hands on Learning

I wasn’t born into a family that was sports oriented. But I was involved in a good amount of physical learning. As a child though, my introverted personality had me step back from the performing arts. It wasn’t until age 18, that I felt more comfortable to engage in goal-oriented physical activities. Activities like dance, music, stage performances. 

I enjoy hands on learning. It hasn’t always been the way that was most available to me. Most of my education was book and standard testing based. My career choices have reflected my love for interaction and engaging activities. Almost 30 years ago, I became a dental assistant, this was during high school, when I took vocational training. When I moved to the city of Seattle, I started taking ballet classes at a studio near where I lived. I then continued dancing through college until I had my second son. When I moved to Cincinnati Ohio, I got a job in the culinary arts. I enjoyed working with food and moved on to become an assistant pastry chef and cake decorator. 

I few years later I became a caretaker for my grandmother. She and I became very close and I realized this was something I was good at, being a caretaker. I enjoyed taking care of her and styling her hair and makeup. When she passed away I decided to go to cosmetology school, where I learned skills in hair design, nail care and skin care. This led to another discovered interest in medical massage. So, 5 years after graduating from cosmetology school I also became a massage therapist. 

Currently, I have been enjoying work at a salon and spa, where I can provide many health and wellness services. I enjoy being hands on in helping others and caring for them. This year 2021, I have decided to return to college and finish nursing school. My career pursuit in the health sciences started more than 20 years ago. Now that my children are grown, I’m excited to be able to have another chance to pursue this passion of using my hands and heart to help others.

#studyblr #studywithme #nursingschool #studentoflife #singleparenthood #massagetherapy #cosmetology #cookie decorating #baker #dental assistant #ballet #performing arts #bodily kinesthetic #journal #developmental journey

[meet-me-where-i-am]

https://www.kcc.org.au/news/single-not-single-mum-parenting-in-community?fbclid=IwAR3_WtTkpvE4A7shg-C_-mYK04H4cr5PPkNczhQkOA4TI0Co9tL-8Y3nwXA

"Gods’ community gives me strength when I am weak, so I can be what my children need."

In this Mother's Day reflection, Author and Blogger, Ruth Baker, shares what God has been teaching her in the joys and challenges of parenting two boys as a single mother in Christian community.

#faith #christian #jesus #church #christianity #parenting #single parents #singleparenthood #singlemum