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sensitively-taken · 8 months

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what's with your kisses? — park sunghoon

synopsis. Park Sunghoon has never had much time or even a slight care for dating, romance, love, or anything of that sort. so, when you kiss him at a rowdy party one night, as his first kiss ever, he’s surprised to find that he wants more. what he thought was going to be a one-time thing, he finds evolving into something he never wants to end—even if you two aren’t meant to be more than a summer fling.

pairing. park sunghoon x gender-neutral!reader ft. jake sim

genres. fluff, strangers to lovers au, summer (fling) au

warnings. underage drinking & all that implies! please let me know if i've missed any :)

word count. 10.7k (10737)

taglist. @soobin-chois @my5colors @kflixnet @jaeyunverse @heejojo @tbzloonar @odxrilove @aizzon

listen to! strangers, sigrid ⭑ i'll be down, talia goddess ⭑ lovestained, hope tala ⭑ yuck, charli xcx ⭑ feature me, flo ⭑ summer's over, tv girl ft. jordana ⭑ yellow cab, dpr live (click on the listen to for the spotify playlist, which i recommend listening to unshuffled)

notes. ermmm..... after more than a year and (almost) radio silence on this blog, here she is!! i'm rlly sorry ab how long it took for me to post this (esp when it was sitting in my drafts for a whole year..) 😭😭 but SHE'S HERE and that's all that matters!! since this was originally an entry for @/prettywon's soul symphonies collab, this song is based on yellow cab by dpr live, as you can probably tell by the title & playlist. i was rlly trying to reflect that boyish infatuation he's singing ab so if u cringe a bit i understand 😪 i did too tysm lola @ijhyo for beta reading this for me! (pls pardon me for tagging u a few hours late 🙏🏾) but enough rambling from me!! enjoy! ❤️

I – K is for Kiss

There was no such thing as the perfect first kiss.

Park Sunghoon, a nineteen-year-old boy who’d never been kissed, had accepted this fact long ago. A lucky few got to have their first kiss with their first love or a longtime crush, while a lot more people had embarrassing stories they’d share on drunken nights. He knew a first kiss wasn’t something out of a fairytale. But, he felt that, at the very least, he should have an adequate first kiss–preferably with someone he had some sort of feelings for.

So, he’d never predicted that he’d end up losing his lip virginity to a stranger at the summer party his best friend, Jake, was throwing.

Or that he’d like it. (Sunghoon wasn’t sure he could even admit that.)

He could admit this though: you were a good kisser. A very, very good kisser–at least, according to his standards. Even he–the nineteen-year-old who’d never even held hands with someone, let alone kissed someone–was able to realise you’d done this a dozen times before when you cupped his cheek–not aggressively, but softly, gently–whispered the question in his ear, and pulled him into a chaste, soft kiss as soon as he’d nodded awkwardly.

Then, moving your hand from his cheek to his neck and smirking slightly, you deepened the kiss.

That’s when he started wondering why he’d never done this before.

You didn’t move too fast, or too slow. It was almost like you knew exactly what he was thinking, what he was feeling, because the second it would start feeling a bit too much for him and his head would start swimming, you would pull back and rest your forehead against his. But, when he started missing the feel of your lips on his, your eyes would flicker to his, the question on the tip of your tongue, and lean in again.

He would never say it out loud, not to you or anyone else, but he was glad you’d taken the lead. Because with the way his hands were trembling to wrap themselves around your waist, and how he’d avoid your gaze every time you pulled back, he wasn’t so sure you two would’ve even been here if you’d left the initiating to him.

All of a sudden, you pulled back–the first time you didn’t do what he wanted–and Sunghoon chased your lips for a bit, cheeks reddening when he realised you weren’t leaning back in.

He stepped back, which was hard to do in a cramped shed but he managed and cleared his throat. Suddenly, he was very interested in inspecting the design of said shed. “Um… is something wrong? Did I, I don’t know, did I do something wrong?”

“No,” you smiled coyly and licked your lips (Sunghoon’s eyes may have flickered back up in time to catch the moment and linger on it), “the seven minutes are up.”

Oh. Right. That–a very silly round of seven minutes in heaven–was how he’d got here. Stuck in a shed. Kissing a complete, random stranger. Y’know, the daily, run-of-the-mill stuff for Sunghoon.

He nodded slowly, flicking away the few dark hairs that fell in front of his eyes. “Right, right. After you.”

“After you?” You laughed, a warm sound he found himself melting to (on the inside. On the outside, he was biting his lip so hard he could taste your chapstick on his tongue), “This whole time you haven’t done anything, but now you want to be a gentleman?”

His face reddened and he crossed his arms over his chest. “No one said gentlemen have to be good at kissing!”

“You do have a point, kind sir.” He rolled his eyes at your jab. “I’d just think it’d be much more gentlemanly of you to look me in the eyes, instead of, dunno, glaring at my lips.”

At this rate, Sunghoon was sure someone’s face couldn’t be as red as his was.

He made a point to look into your eyes for a good ten seconds, breath held, before looking at his flip flops and murmuring, “I wasn’t glaring… I think. Like, I’m not mad at your lips or anything.”

You laughed again, a deeper sound he was sure came from the depths of your heart, and with a small grin on his face, Sunghoon decided he liked the sound.

“I wasn’t saying you were mad.” You stepped closer to him and Sunghoon’s breath hitched. You reached out to him, and for a second Sunghoon thought you were going to cup his face and kiss him again–he wanted you to–but then you reached up and smoothed his eyebrows and the space between them. “Just relax these big boys a bit. They can get a day off glaring, don’t you think, cutie?”

You didn’t wait for a reply. Instead, you smiled and reached behind Sunghoon for the shed door, stepping out to hear a chorus of cheers from some other partygoers and leaving the boy dumbfounded and red.

It was only when Sunghoon moved to leave the shed that he realised he’d never caught your name.

II – I is for Infatuation

Sunghoon was not thinking about the kiss. Well. Kisses.

At least, that was what he toldhimself.

But, ever since he’d woken up at Jake’s place the morning after, with a head so heavy he wasn’t sure he could even lift it, it was the only thing on his mind.

First thing in the morning, when he couldn’t even remember what his name was, he thought about it. Late at night, hours past when he’d told himself he’d go to sleep, he thought about it. Even in his dreams, he couldn’t get the thought of you and your stupid lips out of his head. (Jake had called him obsessed, but he preferred to think of it as a little infatuation.)

He was sure he was going insane when he saw someone perusing the chapstick section in the grocery store and immediately thought of you, only for him to find out it was you when your hands landed on the same pack.

Sunghoon drew his hand back like he was stung, while you simply took the balm and murmured an apology without sparing him a glance.

He wasn’t sure whether to breathe a sigh of relief or disappointment. On one hand, it was you–the only person in the entire world who’d kissed Park Sunghoon on his very chapped, very dry lips (which was the reason he told himself he was in the lip balm section in the first place and not because he couldn’t get your lips out of his head). On the other hand, it was you–the only person in the entire world who’d kissed Park Sunghoon on his very chapped, very dry lips.

Sunghoon didn’t have much time to think about it though, because you suddenly looked back and raised your eyebrows at him.

He bit his lip in anticipation of what you were going to say, but he could’ve never imagined you’d say, “Nice jammies, cutie.”

Sunghoon was beginning to think you had a thing for embarrassing him, as his cheeks turned the shade of some of the chapsticks on display. He rubbed at the nape of his neck, murmuring, “Thanks, my grandma crocheted them for me.”

“Really?” Your eyes shone with actual interest, and Sunghoon’s blush spread across his cheeks. “Do you think you could send me her number or something? I’ve been trying to get the hang of crocheting recently, but it’s just not been working.”

“I would, totally, a hundred percent, but I don’t have your number yet, so…” He went silent, as he realised what he’d said and your eyebrows climbed further up your head.

Sunghoon wished the ground would open up. Pronto.

“Wow, cutie, I have to say, I’m kinda impressed.” You stretched out your hand, which made Sunghoon’s brows furrow, until you gestured for the phone in his pyjama pocket. “I never thought you’d be the type of gentleman to muster up the balls to ask for my number, but here we are.”

He groaned as he passed you his phone, a slight flush to his face. “Could we not rehash the whole gentleman bit? That was kinda embarrassing for me.”

“What?” You grinned, eyes flickering between his phone screen and him. “Do you mean the part where you didn’t know how to kiss back or the part where you stared at my lips the whole time after, cutie?”

If Sunghoon wasn’t sure before, he definitely was now. You had a thing for embarrassing him–and calling him cutie. He’d never admit it, but he was finding that he didn’t really seem to mind either.

He avoided your gaze and toyed with the hem of his sweater, the ghost of a smile on his lips. “Um, both?”

“’ Kay, got it.” You passed his phone back to him and watched him redden at what you’d saved yourself as.

“Couldn’t your name have sufficed? Why did you—” he groaned and buried his face behind his hands, his voice coming through as muffled— “Why did you have to save yourself as ‘seven minutes hottie?’ Isn’t that too conceited of you... and corny?”

You shrugged. “It’s not wrong, is it?”

Even though you couldn’t see his face redden, he figured you’d imagined it as you let out a small snort. “What? Are you gonna tell me I’m not hot?”

“... No,” came his reluctant reply, as he finally removed his hands from his face and went to change your contact name to your actual name, only to remember he’d never got it. “Ah, wait, what’s your name?”

“My name?” You hummed quietly, like you were considering something, and Sunghoon felt a certain type of anticipation grow in his stomach. “If I tell you my name, do I get a kiss, cutie?”

He scoffed, though he could still feel some blood rush to his cheeks. You were really something. “I thought you said I was a bad kisser.”

“Uh-uh,” you corrected, leaning in slowly, “I said you don’t know how to kiss. But, once you do, well… who knows?”

For the second time in a week, Sunghoon felt the distance between you two close and desperately wished you were going to kiss him. Yes, he was in a grocery store and yes, anyone could walk past at any moment, but when you leaned in so close to him–with your soft lips pursed and your eyes staring into his soul–he couldn’t help but fall victim to the pull you had on him. He was weak–so weak–to you.

But, just like before, you didn’t.

You simply brushed his bed hair out of his face and snorted a bit at his spaced-out expression, before stepping back into a space where Sunghoon could finally breathe and think of something else other than your lips on his.

“Yeah,” he murmured, so low that you had to lean back in to hear him.

Sunghoon had always thought of himself as a reasonable, patient person. He knew if he wanted quality things in his life, he’d have to get used to waiting often–at least, that’s what his parents had taught him. But, every time you came into his orbit, his usually thick line of patience wore thin with a simple glance or smile from you.

What were you doing to him?

“Sorry,” your tongue flicked back over your lips, “what was that?”

His line snapped.

“Yeah, you do get a kiss.”

And the words were gone before he could take them back. But, blood rushing in his ears and heart pounding out of his chest, Sunghoon found he didn’t want to take them back–even though, in the back of his mind, part of him was blushing and squirming at his wording.

“Oh?” you said, looking straight into his eyes–unwavering, for once. A certain tension filled the air, as you two stared at each other for a moment, the night of the party probably replaying in both your heads. Careful not to disturb the atmosphere between you two, you whispered, “_____. My name’s _____.”

The tension wasn’t cut, but simply deflated like a balloon as Sunghoon let out a long breath, cheeks painted a dark red, and asked, “But not here, right? I’m not saying we’re doing anything too scandalous, but my mum’s good friends with the manager here, so… Yeah. I kinda, um–maybe I, maybe I shouldn’t have said anything.”

There was a moment of silence, as you stared incredulously at the blushing boy, before you burst out into full-fledged laughter. You hugged your sides a bit and smiled so wide that any passerby would’ve thought Sunghoon was a comedic genius.

Before he could get the wrong idea, you cupped Sunghoon’s face and said, “You’re just too cute, cutie.”

And he smiled a little, slowly as his eyes traced your face, his brows finally relaxed.

You wiped an imaginary tear from your eye, sobering up, and asked, “So. Where's your car?”

III – S is for Scrapbook

You and Sunghoon had ended up kissing in his car.

When he’d told Jake about it later, he’d said you guys had made out–to embarrass Sunghoon, he assumed–but the kisses had been soft and chaste, where you’d been more focused on getting Sunghoon to reciprocate than just kissing him. He had, albeit slowly, and by the time he’d dropped you off at your house, he was able to proudly say that he had initiated a kiss between you two.

It had built his confidence incredibly, being able to say that he’d kissed you and not the other way around–not that he was saying it to anyone, besides Jake really–so much so that he’d texted you just a few minutes after he’d gotten home. He’d panicked then, wondering if you’d think it weird he’d texted you so quickly, but you’d responded just as fast that his nerves had calmed and he’d found himself laughing at your texts.

While talking to you face to face was something he didn’t think he’d ever get used to, texting you was something he could do with ease–well, somewhat.

In the late afternoons, when he woke up with messy bed hair and mucus still in his eyes, he’d check his phone to see if you’d sent anything–which you almost always had. Whether it was a quick picture of something you'd seen on a walk, your poor attempts at making breakfast, or even just a morning selfie.

On some days, he’d feel too flustered and musty to send anything in return–Like, what if you realised he was wearing the same shirt he’d sent a picture in yesterday?—and on others, he had to shut off his phone to take deep breaths after sending something as simple as him brushing his teeth.

Okay, so he was still struggling to talk to you, but at least he didn’t stutter over text and go red every few seconds.

With his awkwardness out of the way, he could actually learn things about you. Like your favourite colour, your favourite spots in town, and your hobbies. He even learned you liked to scrapbook and every summer, you’d make a scrapbook of all your highlights. Polaroids, film stills, movie tickets, coupons, and more would go into the scrapbook and at the end of summer, you’d post little snippets on it on your Instagram page. He’d told you it was cute and jokingly asked if he’d be featured in this summer’s scrapbook, to which you’d responded with ‘we’d have to go out for u to be included wouldnt we?’

Which is what led to this moment. He had thought you were joking about the whole going out thing because it’d been late at night and you two had just been talking about the trips you’d been going on with your families in the next couple of days, but then the next morning–that morning–you’d sent two tickets to a film showing that evening–this evening. Right now–and a short, little ‘wanna go see this? my scrapbook’s feeling a little hoon-less rn :(’.

Evidently, he hadn’t said no, because he was now parked outside your house, trying to calm himself down as he waited for you to come out.

His hands were sweating a bit, and he kept checking his reflection in his rearview mirror, anxiously biting his lower lip and running a hand through his hair. Surprisingly, it wasn’t even the fact that he was going to see you that was stressing him out, it was more the fact that he didn’t know what this was. Were you guys just going out to see a late-night movie as friends? Was it a date? Should he have shown up with flowers or a gift? Were you guys just friends? Were you something more? Did you always ask your friends to see movies late at night so impromptu? Did he even see you as more than a friend?

All the questions made his head swim and his palms sweat, but he couldn’t stop thinking about them. He hadn’t been thinking of this the few weeks you guys had been texting, but now he felt like a broken record, gaze bouncing between his reflection and your house.

And then all his thoughts slowed to a stop.

You walked out of your house with a slight smile and a twinkle in your eye, and his brain turned to mush. You looked… good. That was all he was capable of thinking, as you walked the short distance to his car, waving, and slid into the passenger seat.

Sunghoon stared at you for a second, as you put on your seatbelt and said hi, his mind completely blank. Then, your touch on his shoulder and a furrow between your brows brought him back to the present and he spat out a jumbled mess of, “Good, yeah, yeah. I’m good, you’re good, so good.”

It was your turn to stare, confusion clear in your eyes, and panic rose within him.

“Wait, I mean you look good!” he said, gesturing at you, “I mean, not that you don’t look good all the time, but, like, you look really good right now. Like, wow, I–I should stop talking.”

You blinked at him for a second and then laughed that same laugh that melted his insides. He noticed, as you threw your head back slightly, that you hadn’t removed your hand from his shoulder, and Sunghoon found himself relishing your touch.

“Stop it, cutie, you’re gonna make me blush,” you said playfully, rolling your eyes and hitting his chest lightly. You sobered up slightly, but the smile was still wide on your face as you said, “You look good, too. Very suave, very cool. I can’t lie though, I miss the bedhead and your grandma’s sweater a bit.”

With your easy words lightening the mood, he found himself relaxing a bit–enough to pull away from the curb and start driving. “Really? Maybe I’ll wear it next time.”

You didn’t blink at his mention of a next time, though Sunghoon searched your face for any sign of discomfort or surprise. Instead, your smile grew slightly and you asked, “What type of date are you thinking? Like, an early morning IHOP or Waffle House thing? Or, more of an early-morning pancake date at home?”

If it weren’t for the fact that he’d stopped at a red light, Sunghoon was sure he would’ve crashed his car right at that moment. He gulped loudly and spared your expectant eyes a glance, as he could feel his blood rush in his ears and hear his heart pound out of his chest.

The light turned green and he cleared his throat. “Uh, so, does that mean this is a date?”

He was glad he couldn’t see your reaction to his question–you probably thought he was silly–but was also nervous because you went quiet for a bit. Sunghoon considered turning on the radio and moving on from the topic, if that could dispel the momentary awkwardness between you two, but he wanted to hear your answer.

You laughed slightly, but he could hear the nervous undertones. “Do you not want it to be one? I’m sorry, I just assumed because, well, we kissed at the party and we’ve been talking and stuff since then, so… I thought you were more of a dating type of guy, but–”

“Wait, what?” he interrupted, a crease in his forehead as he spared you a glance. Something within him shattered at the sight of the uncertainty on your face. Had he done that? “What other type of guy would I be?”

“Well, you know…” You paused, shifting slightly in your seat. “There are some guys that just wanna have fun. Mess around, you know? I didn’t think you were one of those guys, but if that’s what you wanna do, then–”

“No,” he said fiercely, only realising how angry he sounded when you glanced at him in surprise. “I want to date you. I really do. I just… I thought you didn’t and I didn’t know if we were just friends, and I’ve never done this before so, I just–”

“You’ve never done this before?” you cut him off, visible shock in your eyes. “There’s no way, Hoon. You’re joking, right?”

And with that, the awkwardness dissipated, as his cheeks flamed and he avoided your wide eyes.

“I know, it’s weird–”

“No, no!” You smiled a bit at his flustered state. “It’s not weird. I’ve only dated once before and, even then, it wasn’t that serious, so we’re kind of in the same boat.”

It was his turn to glance at you with incredulous eyes. “Wait, really? I thought you had so much dating experience cause, like, you’re such a good kisser and you’re so confident and forward, y’know?”

You shrugged. “Like I said, some guys just wanna mess around. Sometimes, I do too.”

“And that’s not what you want with me, right? You actually want to date, right?” You’d already told him you considered this a date, and he’d already told you he wanted to date you–which you hadn’t objected to–but he just had to make sure that was real, and his mind hadn’t made that up.

“Yeah, Hoon,” you started softly, a shy smile on your lips–something he thought he’d never see on you. “I actually want to date you.”

Immediately, his eyes flickered back to the road and his cheeks flushed, a wide grin slowly stretching on his lips. You laughed at his smile, loud and warm, and he closed his eyes in bliss and only opened them again to smile at you.

“So, this is a date? For sure?” he asked, one hand on the wheel and the other on the console as he flickered through the channels for a song.

“Mhm,” you hummed, your hand brushing his as you turned up the volume on a specific channel, smiling at the way his flush deepened. You held his hand, intertwining your fingers with his, and nodded. “This is a date.”

Sunghoon couldn’t even remember why he’d been so nervous, and why his palms–one of which was currently touching yours–had been so sweaty, as he gazed into your eyes and leaned in for a chaste kiss. He smiled into it and rolled his eyes to himself, all of his questions answered. Especially the one he’d been too worried to even ask himself.

If he’d had any doubt about it before, he was sure of it now.

He liked you. Maybe even too much for a summer fling.

IV – S is for Sorry

Over the next few days, Sunghoon found himself wishing you guys were more than just a summer fling.

It was wistful thinking, he knew that already. Just a few months prior, you guys hadn’t even been aware of the other's existence. Now, to him, it felt like you took up every inch of his thoughts, dreams, and being. And, in just a couple of weeks, you’d be off to your respective universities, leaving the short fling between you just that–a short, summer fling.

You two were avoiding talking about it, despite the palpable tension it added to your conversations when you brought up the future. You would mention how you were going to look into photography courses at your uni on a video call and Sunghoon would smile outwardly, while inwardly he’d wonder if you’d find someone else to call your muse–as he’d gotten used to you calling him.

He would mention how he was going to do a double major since he wasn’t completely sure what he wanted to do, and he’d notice the way you’d bite your lip like you were stopping yourself from asking him where. And, just now, moments ago on your video call, you had mentioned how you wanted to go on another date with him after you both got back from your hometowns, but before… (well, you hadn’t continued but he knew you meant before you two had to part.)

He knew you two were only prolonging your pain, and he was only wounding himself deeper by thinking so wistfully, but you two were happy at this exact moment. And, it wasn’t enough, but he’d make it be enough if that was what you two needed.

At least, that’s what he’d been thinking till his sister barged into his childhood room and said his grandma wanted to see him.

Now, legs tucked under himself and head lowered, Sunghoon sat opposite her, with a long table between them, and a tense silence filled the room.

He wasn’t sure what his grandma “seeing him” meant. She wasn’t very old, just in her early sixties, but she was a calm, wise woman who’d lived to see and experience a lot, so she may as well have had the wisdom of someone a century old. If she wanted to “see him,” that most likely meant she had a piece of advice for him that he wouldn’t like.

For once, he was right.

“So, your mum told me you’ve been seeing someone?”

Sunghoon coughed abruptly, patting his chest as a deep flush flooded his cheeks. “I’m sorry?”

“Sorry?” Sunghoon’s grandma scoffed and eyed him slowly. “What are you sorry for? Not calling to consult me first? Or, for trying to hide it from me? Or, is there something else, hm?”

He raised his eyes to meet his grandma’s eyes, but immediately lowered them at the fierce scowl on her face. He bowed deeply, palms flat before him. “I’m sorry, Grandma.”

She eyed his form for a second, before scoffing again and gesturing toward him. “Sit, sit. I didn’t call you here to hear you apologise all day.”

Sunghoon sat again and raised his head but still didn’t look his grandma in the eye. His mind was too preoccupied with wondering how his mum had figured it out, considering you guys had gone on your first date just a couple of days ago.

He jolted a bit when his grandma asked, “You’re not going to ask me why I called you?”

“Sorry,” he began and cleared his throat at his grandma’s glare. “Why did you call me, Grandma?”

She continued eyeing him with the same, wary gaze she’d been eyeing him with since he’d entered her room for a few moments, before she suddenly became sombre. Without the glint in her eyes, Sunghoon could see how deep the pools in her eyes were and the lines surrounding them. He released a breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding.

“Well, what’s your plan? Hm?” Her eyes bore deep into his like her question was just a formality and she already knew the answer. Sunghoon wouldn’t be surprised if she already did. “Are you two going to be a campus couple?”

He knew her question was mostly rhetorical, but he couldn’t help but imagine it. Walking you to and from lectures; studying together in a library or a cosy coffee shop; going to endless parties with you; proofreading each other’s papers; you wearing his clothes in his dorm. Sunghoon felt himself grow warm.

Then, even warmer as his grandma cleared her throat and raised a knowing brow in his direction. She didn’t have to say anything for him to realise she was expecting an answer.

“I…” He faltered for a moment, remembering the hesitancy in your eyes every time a hint of the topic was brought up. “I don’t know, Grandma. I… well, there’s nothing I can really do, I guess. We’re probably not even going to the same universities, so I don’t know what the plan is.”

“Have you guys talked about it?”

A pause settled between the two of them, as Sunghoon lowered his eyes again and prepared himself to bow again.

His grandma scoffed, the loudest of all her scoffs so far, and sighed exasperatedly. “You two haven’t even discussed anything? And you’re here talking like you’re some handsome lead in a drama and _____’s life will be in danger if you two continue dating?”

“Ah, Grandma, are you saying I’m not hands–Wait, wait? How do you know _____’s name?”

She paused slightly and carefully schooled her features. “Is that important right now?”

“I mean,” Sunghoon’s brows furrowed, then he remembered your touch against them and he relaxed them a bit, “considering that I’ve never told Mum _____’s name or even the fact that we’ve been on one date, yes? Kinda?”

“I’m your grandma, am I not?” was her only response, with the ghost of a smile on her lips. He grimaced slightly, but his grandma continued without any regard for his reaction. ��I know you guys are kids, but you didn’t even think of discussing anything? You were just going to kiss and say ‘bye bye’ and continue with your lives?”

“I mean,” Sunghoon started, trying to fight the blush climbing up his body. There wasn’t any point, though, because the apples of his cheeks were already shining. “_____’s not even my partner or anything, so it isn’t my place…”

“But isn’t that the end goal?”

His grandma stared at him, but he couldn’t hold the weight of her stare. Because deep down inside, Sunghoon knew she was right. And he knew he wanted nothing more than to be able to be called yours.

To see more pictures of the scenery from your morning walks and even join you on them too. To cuddle up in bed and watch some of your favourite animes together, only pausing to snuggle further into the blanket. To finally go on that early morning date at a Waffle House, eating your orders in his car where his passenger seat would be perfectly adjusted to seat you. To have a home, a space, with you.

But, he thought. There was always a ‘but’.

Before, that ‘but’ had been that he wasn’t even sure if that was what you wanted as well, if he even really wanted it. Now, that ‘but’ was the inevitable space and distance that would grow between you two. The space that would grow so large that you two wouldn’t be able to have any space for each other.

Sunghoon’s stomach sank as his thoughts spiralled, but he summed them up to his grandma with a simple shrug.

“Why are you, why are you so dramatic?” she asked, rolling her eyes at her grandson’s face. A fierce scowl was back on her face and, if it weren’t for the table between the two of them, she looked like she was about ready to pull on Sunghoon’s ear. “Why are you sitting here in my house moping and frowning like everything’s decided? Who knows? Maybe _____ is willing to make it work, to even travel to another city just to see you and your dramatic self. But how would you know when you’re busy here moping?”

He’d considered it. Judging from the talks you’d had and the sheer amount of hours you talked every day, Sunghoon was sure that you liked him as well (not as much as he did, he was sure–that wasn’t even remotely possible when he could barely get you off his mind–but enough to deal with his “dramatic self,” as his grandma had put it). But, there it was again, he just couldn’t get rid of that ‘but.’ It was festering in the back of his mind whenever he even thought of bringing it up to you.

“Sunghoon.” There was a note of finality in his grandma’s voice as she said his name. “Discuss things with _____ first. I understand sometimes we experience heartbreak, but I won’t let you break your own heart over foolishness.”

“But Grandma–”

“No ‘buts.’” His grandma folded her arms in her lap and glanced at the door of her room. “No more ‘buts’, Sunghoon.”

Despite the lingering worry settled in his system, he sighed and stood up slowly. Sunghoon bowed deeply, glanced at his hands, and left his grandma’s room with her words in mind.

V – E is for End

Sunghoon wasn’t too sure he’d be able to follow his grandma’s instructions.

He was back now from his hometown, back in the comfort of his familiar Seoul bedroom, but you weren’t here. He’d known you two wouldn’t get back at the same time, yet that didn’t stop him from feeling slightly lonely without you to go on dates with. It was a numbing feeling, that left him feeling empty if he dwelled on it too long, and he worried he’d go completely numb if you two truly didn’t end up working out.

The thought sent a chill down his spine every time Sunghoon’s mind strayed to it and Jake’s feeble comforts did little to quell his worries.

To make matters worse, you unexpectedly postponed your return date and said you couldn’t go to a pool party Jake was throwing anymore. You were very vague about the reason why when he asked and Sunghoon began worrying once again. He even brought up not going to the party to Jake, but his best friend wouldn’t have it and threatened to drag him to the party himself.

So, there he was. Standing at the edge of a crowd of strangers, nursing his second beer of the night, and completely alone. Well, he wasn’t completely alone. Jake and some of Sunghoon’s other friends had passed by him and invited him to the dance floor, but he couldn’t get himself to get out there and dance with someone who wasn’t you. The most they’d been able to get him to do was drink a little, even if the drinks only fuelled his moping.

A couple of people sent him inviting looks and winks, dancing in a way that made him avert his eyes immediately, but he didn’t budge an inch from where he was standing. Maybe if you were here, he would. No, definitely, if you were here he would. His mind wandered to grasp at the edges of the first night you’d met, trying to remember if you’d been dancing that night, but he couldn’t pull up a single image of you dancing.

If you were here, how would you dance? Would you dance with a lot of energy, completely letting yourself loose? Or, would you take your time to flow with the music, swinging your hips and smiling at him in that way that just drove him crazy?

Sunghoon smiled a bit at the thought and felt his hips move along to the beat, frowning once he realised what he was doing.

He missed you.

Just a few months ago, he hadn’t known he could miss someone the way he was missing you, but he was and he couldn’t do anything about it.

As if his best friend could read his thoughts, Jake danced off the dance floor to Sunghoon’s side, running a hand through his unruly, blond hair. Sunghoon could smell the booze coming off him, and he watched as his friend nearly lost his footing trying to lean on Sunghoon. Jake barely noticed, though, as he just kept smiling up at Sunghoon. Sunghoon made a point to look anywhere, except in the blond’s direction.

After a while of just trying to ignore his drunk friend, Sunghoon eventually rolled his eyes and raised an eyebrow in Jake’s direction. “What?”

“I can’t, I can’t just look at you now?” Jake asked, his wide smile never leaving his face.

“No, it’s not that. It’s the way you’re looking at me.”

“How am I looking at you?” His friend leaned in close, stretching an arm around Sunghoon’s shoulders. “Hm? I’m just looking at you with my normal eyeballs, my very normal eyeballs, actually just like you, you too.”

“You’re looking at me like, I don’t fucking know, you’re hiding some type of secret from me,” Sunghoon said, pushing Jake off his frame. “And I don’t like that look because the last time you looked at me like that I ended up kissing _____ in a shed for seven minutes.”

Jake’s wide smile grew into a slight, smug smirk. “And look how well that turned out for you. Someone’s not so bitchless anymore.”

Sunghoon rolled his eyes and took a swig of his drink but couldn’t hide the dusting of pink on his cheeks. (If he were to consider things between the two of you, you would be the one who wasn’t so bitchless anymore, considering he was more of your bitch than you were his with the way he was nursing a beer in the corner of a party like a loser just because he missed you. He didn’t need to tell Jake all that though.)

Instead, he feigned an annoyed scowl and crossed his arms over his chest. “What do you want, Jake?”

“I thought you would never ever ever ask.” His friend grinned. “Can you please get out the other floaties from the shed? Some people ripped these and, well, turns out not everyone at a pool party can actually swim. A bit crazy, I know.”

“Why can’t you? The shed was closer to where you were standing.”

“Um…” his friend trailed off, shaking his head incredulously, “I’m obviously inebriated, you know! Everything weighs a shitton of bricks right now.”

Sunghoon’s feigned scowl deepened into a real one, as he rolled his eyes and put his beer down on the ground. It was getting warm anyway and the alcohol wasn’t doing much for him, except make him miss you more. He shot Jake a look, before shouldering past him and making his way towards Jake’s shed.

It was surprisingly chilly for a summer night out, chilly enough at least that Sunghoon could feel some of the hairs on his arms raise as he stalked towards the shed. But, he welcomed the chill because his alternative was thinking about what had happened the last time he’d walked towards this shed. And once he started thinking about that, he’d start missing the feel of your lips on his, your arms around his neck, your eyes staring into his.

He cursed under his breath at his thoughts, wondering if, for even one second, he could think of something other than you.

Sunghoon immediately answered his question with a ‘no’ when he walked into the shed and he thought he smelled your signature fragrance. He would’ve recognised it anywhere (not because he was obsessed like Jake had once said, but because you’d borrowed his sweater on your date and your scent still lingered even after he’d washed it), so he was sure he wasn’t picking up someone else’s perfume or cologne, but he wouldn’t rule out him imagining your fragrance there as a result of him missing you so much.

So, he ignored the smell filling the shed and clambered around for the light switch. He’d been so sure it was by the wall, but he must’ve been more buzzed than he realised because his fingers kept grazing the air. By the time he finally felt the grooves of the light switch under his fingers and was going to turn it on, Sunghoon was so ready to grab the floaties Jake had asked for and get back to the party, or maybe even go home because–

Sunghoon froze.

He couldn’t think, speak, or do anything as the lights flickered on to reveal… well, you.

Sunghoon was going crazy.

He was so sure you were a figment of his imagination, brought about by how much he missed you, and he immediately frowned at the thought. Missing you was fine, maybe overkill when he thought about how often he thought about you, but creating images of you? That was a bit too much, even for him.

Despite his thoughts, though, Sunghoon couldn’t shake the nagging hope that maybe this was real. It didn’t help that “you”—or you–were smiling at him in a way that made his stomach flip, especially after being away from you for so long.

He felt ridiculous for even bothering, like when a horror film character asks who’s there after hearing a noise in the dark, but he cleared his throat slowly and whispered, “_____?”

You giggled softly and raised your eyebrows at what Sunghoon was sure was an incredulous look on his face. “Yes, Hoon?”

“Oh, my God,” Sunghoon started, feet still locked in place, “Oh, my God.”

You took a step closer to him and your grin only grew wider as he blinked slowly at you. Another step and he gulped slowly. Yet another and his eyes grew wide.

He put a hand up before you could take another step and close the distance between you two. “Wait, wait, wait!”

A small frown lit up your face, but you stayed where you were and slightly cocked your head.

“You’re real?” Sunghoon felt stupid asking, but he still had to check.

The feeling only doubled when your brows furrowed and you asked, “Am I real? … Hoon, is everything okay?”

He felt so warm at the familiar nickname that he could almost ignore the rest of what you said, but the growing concern on your face made him clarify himself.

“I just, I’ve had a bit to drink so I thought that my brain tricked me into thinking you were there.” Sunghoon paused at the bemusement on your face and he suddenly felt a whole lot warmer, despite the chilly air. “Actually, um, now that I say it out loud I do realise how ridiculous it sounds. Sorry.”

“Well,” you smiled at him with a sly glint in your eye, finally closing the gap between you two so your breath was fanning out on his face, “if you want to check, you always can.”

Sunghoon, being the guy he was, immediately thought of how he’d pinch himself in a shocking situation and went to do just that. It was only when you laughed at his actions, an incredulous look in your eyes, that he realised what you’d meant and blushed.

“Oh, I, I–”

“Hoon?” you asked, cutting him off and waiting until he nodded, “You’re so cute sometimes, y’know?”

“Just sometimes?” Sunghoon recovered quickly, sliding his arms around your waist and grinning slightly. He’d missed this too much. “So, what am I the other times?”

“Oh?” You raised an eyebrow. “Someone’s gotten a little bolder, hasn’t he?”

“I’d say it’s your influence. You were bound to rub off on me after sticking around me so much.”

He grinned at the way your brows shot up.

“Sticking around you? Hoon, who was the one that–”

“_____?” It was Sunghoon’s turn to cut you off and his grin grew so wide at the realisation on your face. It felt good to finally flip the tables. “You talk so much sometimes, y’know?”

You rolled your eyes, but there was a slight tug on your lips. “Wow, you’re so original. What, first you’re gonna steal my line, next you’re gonna pull some cheesy rom-com line on me and kiss me?”

“So you’re telling me you wouldn’t like it?” he asked, as one of his hands slowly travelled up your side and settled on cupping your jaw. He didn’t miss the way you sagged into his touch. Sunghoon was going to explode.

The tug on your lips grew into a full grin and you wrapped your hands around his neck. “Now, who said anything about that? C’mere, Hoon.”

He didn’t need to hear it twice. Sunghoon tilted your jaw towards him and leaned in for a soft kiss. It wasn’t intense or desperate, unlike what he’d imagined it be like after being away from you for so long, but he preferred it this way. He could savour the taste of your familiar lip balm against his lips and take his time pecking small, chaste kisses on and around your lips.

He sighed out loud and felt his cheeks flush when you pulled back to laugh. “You really missed me, huh?”

Sunghoon wasn’t sure if it was because of the little alcohol in his system or how much he’d missed you, but he gazed into your eyes and whispered, “I did. I really did.”

And, just like that, the tension was back. The obvious hesitancy. The ‘buts.’ He could feel your hold on his neck loosen slightly and he wanted nothing more than to take his words back and rewind to before he fell too deep, but it was too late. All that was left was for him to either avoid everything or finally face it, despite the worries that built up in his mind.

“_____,” he started gently, like you would run away at any second (but he knew you too well to know that you wouldn’t–he would), “we… we should talk.”

“About what?” you tried, a burst of nervous laughter escaping your lips.

You were avoiding his serious gaze, choosing instead to focus on where your hands met his neck. Sunghoon couldn’t tell much of what you were thinking, but, knowing you, he knew you were only postponing the conversation. Maybe it was because this was supposed to be a fun night for you two–after all, you’d probably sacrificed some more nights with your family to get here. Or, maybe it was because you weren’t ready to discuss it. Either way, it was as much your decision as his.

Sunghoon lowered his hands to your lower back and squeezed lightly. “I mean, we don’t have to if you don’t want to… It’d just be a good idea because soon everyone’s gonna start leaving for uni and well, we don’t even know what’s gonna happen between us then, and it’d probably be best if–”

“Hoon.” You were looking into his eyes now, your brows drawn together. “You’re shaking.”

His eyes grew wide and left your face to glance at his fingers, which were trembling around your waist. He tried laughing, shaking the nerves off, but the sound came out choked and he winced. Without a word, he gestured towards the floor of the shed and slumped against the back wall. You followed shortly after, sitting with your knees bunched up to your chest, one of your shoulders brushing against his. At your touch, Sunghoon wanted to reach out and squeeze one of your hands, but they were balled up on top of your knees, a hard look on your face. He sighed.

“You’re right, Hoon,” you started, staring ahead through the open shed door. The party was still going on outside, the music and noise muted from where you two were, but it might’ve as well not been with the way you two were wrapped up in your own bubble. A tense bubble. “We should talk… about us.”

He nodded, crossing his legs and laying his trembling hands in his lap.

Despite what you said, a short lapse of silence settled between you two and, for a moment, Sunghoon was worried this wasn’t going to go anywhere and he’d made a mistake.

But then you swivelled your head towards him and whispered, “What do you want us to be?”

What does he want you two to be? He’d thought about that question one too many times. It’d only ever hurt, thinking of so many domestic scenes and possibilities with you two when he wasn’t even sure if there could be a ‘you two.’

“What do I want us to be?” he repeated, gazing out the shed. “I want us to be together. I want… I want to keep waking up to your pictures on my phone and to go on spontaneous, little dates with you and finally go for that Waffle House date and… just be with you. I want you.”

With his last words, he slowly looked at you and already found you looking at him. There was a little smile tugging at your lips, that was both sad and happy at the same time, and you just nodded slowly.

As his gaze lingered, you cleared your throat and averted your eyes. “I want that too. Really, I do. You don’t understand how many times I’ve wondered what it’d be like if, I don’t know, we’d met a little earlier. If we could’ve gotten to know each other during high school.

“You know Jake told me you were your school’s drama club star?” You smiled slightly and Sunghoon felt a small smile pull at his lips as well. “I would’ve loved to be in the crowds, cheering you on. Or, even maybe get up on stage with you. Jake told me your school never did Romeo and Juliet, but you��d make a pretty good Juliet, don’t you think?”

Sunghoon chuckled and you did too, your shoulders brushing against each other’s for a moment, till your laughter ebbed away. You stared straight ahead again, frowning.

“And then I wondered why I kept thinking of the past. I mean, it’d just make more sense for me to hope that we could stay together, you know? But instead, I keep wishing we’d known each other longer.” You smiled again, that smile from before, but Sunghoon was sure it was only sad this time. “And I realised that I, I felt like we were running out of time. That, I don’t know, when summer ends, we end. Like the changing of weather is some type of timer.”

You whispered the last part more to yourself, but Sunghoon heard it and the self-loathing in it. You loathed yourself for the way you’d been thinking. Sunghoon couldn’t help but relate.

Crossing your arms over your chest, you looked at Sunghoon, a flicker of uncertainty in your eyes. “Do you ever feel like that? Like this is all the time we’ll ever have? Like even thinking of a future where we’re together is… I don’t know, like, wrong?”

That familiar hurt Sunghoon felt or anticipated, whenever he thought of the two of you together on campus came to mind and he nodded slowly. The ‘buts were popping up in his mind again, filling him with growing dread and he was starting to regret his decision. Maybe he shouldn’t have said anything, shouldn’t have brought it up, and let you guys live in oblivious bliss for a little longer. But, deep down, he knew that wouldn’t be true bliss. Like his grandma had said, you would only end up hurting yourselves because of your foolishness.

“But that’s not true, is it?” he started, glancing down at his hands which had started trembling again, “I don’t even know, like, what even made us think we only have the summer? Just because we met in summer? When you think of it like that, you feel ridiculous don’t you? We could literally be going to the same uni and we’re here, too anxious to even tell each other where we’re going.”

You snorted, glancing at Sunghoon out of the corner of your eye. “You’re right.” Straightening, you turned your whole body to face him. “You know considering we’re going in a few weeks, we’ve probably put more effort into not mentioning uni in our conversations because it should’ve popped up in our conversations, at least, once before.”

“Exactly. We should just tell each other. Now. Before we, we lose our nerve or something.”

You nodded and bit your lip, while Sunghoon closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He felt your hand brush against his, so he opened his eyes and took your hands in his. Your hands were, surprisingly, clammy. He was going to say something about it, but, glancing at your face, he spotted the way your eyes were darting all around the room.

Instead of commenting on it, Sunghoon took another deep breath. “Ready?”

You nodded once. “Ready.”

A short silence ensued between the two of you, as neither of you said anything or even made a move to say anything. Your eyes finally landed on his and a nervous smile tugged at the edge of your lips. You were nervous, Sunghoon realised belatedly and squeezed your hand instinctively.

“On three?” he offered.

“On three.”

“One, two, three–University of Seoul.”

“Kyunghee University–wait, what the fuck?”

Sunghoon furrowed his brows at the shocked look on your face and your exclamation. He couldn’t even focus on the name of the university you’d said. All the anxieties that’d been bothering him were beginning to boil up and over at the simple lack of happiness on your face. He was almost sure he was the one with the clammy hands now and he moved to remove his hand from yours when you gripped his tightly and began to smile lightly.

“What the fuck,” you repeated, still as shocked, but with the beginnings of a grin on your face.

Sunghoon only looked at you with his brows still furrowed. He frowned slightly when you began laughing. “I’m confused.”

“I can’t believe I was so stressed about this,” you muttered, mostly to yourself, but still smiling directly at him. “Hoon, we’re so dumb. So fucking dumb.”

“I agree… I think? But, why, I–”

“What neighbourhood is the University of Seoul in?”

“_____, what? I–”

You placed a finger on his lips and shook your head. “Don’t overthink it. Just answer my question.”

He glanced between your finger on his lips and your face. “Dongdaemun-gu.”

“Dongdaemun-gu,” you repeated, your small smile growing into a full one now, “Guess where Kyunghee is?”

“Uh.” He looked away from your face, trying to picture a map of Seoul in his head, but he drew short (he’d always been bad at geography anyway). “Myeongnyun? Daehakno?”

He didn’t think it was possible, but your smile grew even wider. “Not even close. It’s in Hoegi-Dong.”

Sunghoon nodded slowly, while you just looked at him with an expectant look on your face. He shook his head sheepishly and you just rolled your eyes.

“Hoon, they’re like five minutes away from each other.” You paused to let it sink in and laughed as Sunghoon’s brows finally relaxed and his eyes widened. “This is fucking stupid. We’re so fucking stupid.”

Sunghoon could only blink dumbly at you, while you just laughed at his dumbfounded shock. Immediately, his grandma’s words returned to him and a huge sense of embarrassment washed over him as he realised he’d proven her right. But, glancing between your intertwined hands and your wide smile, he found that he didn’t mind the embarrassment if it meant he still had a space with you.

(He’d do nearly anything to have that with you, he realised.)

You broke him out of his stupor by wrapping your arms around his neck and whispering, “So, Hoon, how do you feel now knowing that we’ll be, like, five minutes away from each other?”

“Want me to be honest?” he asked, placing his hands back on your waist (where they just seemed to fit perfectly, he noticed) and grinning softly when you nodded. “I feel really fucking embarrassed. Like, for weeks I’ve just been thinking of how much I’d miss you and wondering if I should even ask you out since we might not even see each other ever again. And, in the back of my head, I knew it was dumb because, if we wanted to make it work, we could make it work for sure. But, it was hard to remember that and–”

“Hoon, hoon,” you interrupted, giggling slightly and tightening your grip on his neck, “now, you’re the one talking too much.”

Sunghoon paused, taking a second to process what was going on. You were in front of him, hands wrapped around his neck, and smiling widely like he made you the happiest person in the world. He was in front of you, hands wrapped around your waist, and still trying to wrap his head around the fact that you two would be five minutes away from each other nearly every day–the closest to a campus couple he could ever ask for. He didn’t believe in fate (the same way he hadn’t believed in perfect first kisses, but he’d seen just how well that’d worked out for him), but the more he thought about it, the more he was sure that something more than luck had landed you two in this situation.

He sighed out loud and rested his head against yours. ”God, I feel like I aged twenty years worrying about all of this. It feels a bit silly now, doesn’t it?”

“A bit is an understatement, don’t you think?” you replied, settling yourself in his lap. He froze a bit, and you moved to get up, but he shook his head and brought you closer. You smiled. “Besides, you’d probably still look good as a thirty-nine-year-old.”

“Oh, gross.” He scrunched up his nose as he moved closer to you, his hands running up and down your sides. “I don’t even want to imagine myself over thirty yet.”

“Really?” you raised a brow, arms locking around his neck and eyes flickering to his lips. “You’d be a hot DILF though.”

He snorted. “God, shut up.”

Your smile widened, a knowing glint in your eye. “Don’t make me say the cheesy rom-com line, Hoon.”

“Alright, alright,” he murmured, lips a breadth away from yours, before he kissed you.

Now, this was the desperate, intense kiss he’d been imagining earlier. He wasn’t sure if it was because of the anticipation you’d both been harbouring before or the elation at what you’d just found out, but you both pulled out the works with teeth, tongue–everything. Sunghoon couldn’t begin to describe how he felt, what you were making him feel, but all he knew was he didn’t want it to end.

And when you kissed him on his cheek, tugged on his hand, and pulled him out into the chaos of the party, smiling at him all the while like he was the only guy in the world, he knew it never would.

Epilogue – S is for Summer Fling

You two had decided on the early-morning pancake at-home date.

Evidently so, as you were in nothing but a hoodie of his and his old gym shorts (a fact that Sunghoon had known since yesterday, when you’d slept over at his after Jake’s party, but he was still struggling to grasp), he was in another one of his hoodies and sweatpants, and you were both still rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. The rich smell of butter wafted all around Sunghoon’s kitchen, accompanied by the sizzling sound of him pouring pancake batter on the greasy pan. Besides the sizzles, and the occasional yawn from you, it was a completely silent morning, as Sunghoon concentrated all his efforts into impressing you with his cooking skills.

“So does this mean you’re my boyfriend now?” you asked, breaking the silence and Sunghoon’s focus.

He blinked, glad he was facing the stove and not where you sitting behind the kitchen island, and found that he couldn’t stop blinking. Was he your boyfriend? It was like you read his mind because that’s all he’d been thinking of since the moment he woke up with you in his arms. He’d fallen asleep on many hot summer nights, but he’d never woken up as warm as he had that morning. It was a feeling he’d spent minutes basking in, tracing every one of your resting features with his eyes and wondering how he’d function as your boyfriend, waking up nearly every morning with this same warmth in his chest. It almost seemed too good to be his reality. And if he was your boyfriend, he thought, that meant you were his and–

“Hoon! The pancakes!” you yelled and Sunghoon cursed loudly.

He moved the pan off the stove and turned on the kitchen hood, but it was too late. The pancake was charred beyond recognition and, looking down at it, he wondered how he hadn’t smelt the tinging scent of the burnt pancake.

Sunghoon sighed as he chucked away the pancakes. “I’m sorry, _____, that was the last bit of pancake batter we had. If you don’t mind, I can quickly run to the store and–”

“Don’t worry about it, Hoon,” you said, cutting him off as you slid off the island seat. He couldn’t see where you were, or where you were going, so he stifled his breath a bit when you slid up beside him and thrust your phone in his face. “Besides, we can order in.”

He spared a glance at your face, preparing himself for any signs of disappointment or irritation, but you were just smiling at him with a soft look in your eyes.

His brows furrowed. “Aren’t you hungry?”

“Yeah, I guess,” you started, shrugging, “but I can wait a couple of minutes.”

Sunghoon bit his lip, a protest and another apology on the tip of his tongue, and furrowed his brows further. Your eyes traced his movements, and you placed two gentle fingers on the fold between his brows, smoothing them out. He didn’t say anything as you did. He just lowered his head and frowned slightly at the smoking scent reminding him of his failed attempt at breakfast. You simply grinned at the obvious frustration and disappointment on his face, a look rising in your eyes that he didn’t catch as he chewed on his lower lip.

“Hoon,” you called out softly, waiting for him to raise his head. When he did, you took a step closer to him, a coy look in your eyes. “You didn’t answer my question.”

He was about to furrow his brows again in confusion, but your words from earlier replayed in his head as your smile only grew more teasing, and Sunghoon was sure he was turning as red as the strawberries on the counter behind him.

The boy averted his gaze from you, murmuring, “Well, I was hoping to ask if I could have the honour of being your boyfriend after, you know, we had food that I’d made in our stomachs and proper clothes on our bodies, but I guess so.”

“The honour?” you repeated, raising an eyebrow and muffling a laugh. Sunghoon glared at you lightly when you let a giggle slip, at which you apologised. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry. I promise I’ll bestow you with the honour of being my boyfriend after we run to the grocery store so you can fix up some pancakes and ask me out already.”

You almost laughed again at how quickly he perked up at your words and, this time, he rolled your eyes and smiled slightly at your teasing grin.

As he grabbed his keys, held your hand, and slipped out the door, the same warmth he’d felt that morning bloomed from where your hands met to every other bit of his body. He’d never imagined this, kissing his soon-to-be something in his car before a grocery run, was where he’d find himself after he’d had his first kiss on a night that felt like years ago. He couldn’t even imagine where he’d be with you in a couple of years. All he knew was he was glad you’d ended up as more than a summer fling.

feedback & reblogs are welcome and appreciated! ♡♡

teaser | masterlist

#kflixnet #sunghoon x reader #sunghoon fluff #sunghoon imagines #sunghoon scenarios #enha fluff #enha x reader #enha imagines #enhypen #engene #enha #sunghoon x you #sunghoon x y/n #park sunghoon x reader #enhypen imagines #enhypen scenarios #enhypen x reader #sensitively-taken works

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kingofthe-egirls · 9 months

Text

TRAINING SESSION: LUFFY x Y/N

modern au

(cw: boxing, training, hand!kink, stretching, ballet, silly, kissing, sweetness, fluff, food)

(a/n: haha what if i made a book about this 👀)

Songs: "Sucker Punch" by Sigrid

words: 2.5k

"Like this," Luffy commands, demonstrating the technique. He dodges: ducking between swipes of the reaction target stick, rotating at a medium pace. You're both in his private gym, you standing a few feet away on the mat floor while Luffy shows you his training routine. He bucks up with his forearm fronting: hitting the bar to send it backwards in its rotation.

He repeats the move several times, with both hands. He turns to you, hitting the bar without looking. His grin is irritatingly cocky.

"Your turn," he stands straight up, backing away to give you room. You twirl your ankle on your toes, wiggling a little in the mesh of your sneakers. You've had more experience in ballet, truthfully. And the hardcore sports world is one you've never dabbled in. You huff, embarrassment flooding your cheeks. You're not athletic, besides several poor attempts at tennis and cheerleading.

Ballet is best.

You lift up onto your toes, reminiscent of your days at the barre, practicing relevés until your feet hurt. Your calves burn.

"Okay."

You step up to the reaction target stick, bouncing a little in your knees. "Um...," you falter, loosely clenching fists in front of your tits. "What do I do?"

Luffy laughs, and starts the stick rotating gently for you. "Dodge."

You duck, awkwardly, as the top bar cuffs your head. "Ow," you complain, hitting it back with the side of your wrist. It slaps around faster, and hits your other side. "Fuck!" You huff, puffing out your cheeks in frustration. You wish you could slide around a pole, instead.

"Try again," Luffy stops the bar, hand on your lower back. His heat presses into your body, lining up your side with fire. You clear your throat. You nod, readying yourself again.

He starts the bar slow.

You dodge, leaning far enough away to miss getting hit. You do that a couple more times, getting used to the feeling. You have to bend your knees farther than you'd thought. He hums in approval, backing away a few steps. "Good job," he says, "Now try hitting it back with your fist."

You try, and awkwardly bump the bar as it slowly rotates around you.

"Good job!" he says again, slapping his palm against your chest in approval. He hits just below your collarbone. You huff, unappreciative of the nerves roiling in your belly at every touch or skim. He spins the reaction stick faster, lip caught between his teeth. "Try harder, now."

You blush, and practice dodging a few more times. Moving like this feels strange, having spent most of your life training to bring yourself up, up onto your tippy toes, and this sport required you to sink down low into your center of gravity. You fight against gravity, all the time.

"Start hitting back, y/n."

"Fuck," you breathe, hitting the bar back way too hard. It spins around and knocks you in the face. You straighten up, fists hanging at your sides. "I'm done."

"Okay," Luffy rests his hand on your lower back again, stopping the bar with the other. His knuckles are bruised and scabby, testaments to the hours he's spent in this gym. He trains several hours each day, you saw from the schedule he keeps on his phone.

"Let's stretch," you say, seeing the way his fist clenches around the bar, veins and tendons moving over the knuckles of his hand. Your face flushes harder, and you step away from the contraption in front of you. You twirl around, heading back to the yoga mats across the speckled, rubbery floor. It smells like plastic and Windex. You wish there was a glossy wooden barre strung across the wall-length mirrors, but oh well.

You'll have to take Monkey D. Luffy to a dance studio, sometime.

As it is, however, he grins as you start to stretch. He crosses the room in a jog, his gym shorts hanging loosely around his hips. He's shirtless, abs softly spotlighted by the gym's overhead fluorescents.

You swallow.

"Here," you say, stretching over to the side, one arm over your head and the other below your stomach, like a lowered fourth position. "Let's stretch," you say again, flattening your back as you turn your torso parallel to the floor. You reach your arm straight forward, feeling the pop of your hips and the strain of your shoulder. You grimace.

It's been a while since you've stretched.

"I used to do ballet," you say, switching sides. He copies your movements, slightly. His hands are sloppy, arms loose instead of bowing gracefully like your ballerina-shapes: fingers pointed with your thumbs tucked in, elbows slightly bent to form an oval. "When I was a kid."

"Oh?" He asks, looking up from where he's stretched out on the floor, one leg extended and the other bent. He reaches his toes without a problem. You fold forward, feeling the stretch of your hamstrings as your fingers touch the ground. It's spongey, beneath your touch. Your back is to the mirrored wall. You frown at your own face, upside down. Luffy grins in the reflection, too. "That's so cool!"

"Yeah," you laugh a little, switching to wrap your hands around your left calf. You moan a bit at the soft burn. It feels so good to stretch.

"I did it through high school, too," you swallow, switching sides, "But once I got to college the classes were way too intense." You grimace, straightening up to standing. You fold your arms above your head, leaning one hip to the side. "But I still miss pointe."

"You did pointe?!" He asks, excited. He bounces up on his feet, sinking into a low squat. You watch in awe as his heels stay firmly planted on the floor. Your Achilles tendons could never do that. You twist your lips in jealousy. He's all smiles, though, flushing face and raven hair that sticks out in fluffy spikes. You lean forward to ruffle it, feeling the crow feathers beneath your fingers. He reaches up to grab your wrist, pulling you down to kiss the palm of your hand. "Pretty," he says, staring up at you with a grin.

"Thanks," you say, thumbing his cheek. His face is lit up with a smile, eyes crinkling like crescent moons. You swallow.

"My feet used to hurt all the time," you admit, sitting cross-legged in front of him. He joins you, hands resting lightly on your knees. He leans forward for a quick kiss, and you comply. A soft moan leaves you in the back of your throat. He cups the side of your neck, warm and sure against your skin. You sigh against his lips.

"Why'd ya do it?"

"Because I loved it," you say, straightening up with your hand still on his cheek. You stroke his scar fondly, the line folding under the pad of your thumb. You press into it, gently. "The pain was so good, in a way. It felt so perfect to be able to make those shapes, like...it was so beautiful, and it felt like I was acting out art, in a way. Like those pictures by Degas. I love those paintings," you say, leaning back to support yourself on your hands.

"I'll getcha one," he says, cocky. You snort.

"I don't think you can just...get one of those. Aren't they like, only in museums?" You raise an eyebrow, and watch as he pulls out his phone. The skull-and-crossbones charm clinks against the case.

"Hm," he thinks with his tongue stuck out, "I think ya might be right..."

"Ha!" You laugh, letting your head fall back. You feel warm and rubbery from the workout today. You're guessing Luffy is nowhere near tired, though, from his exercise regimen and the fact there's no sweat on his face. He'd even ran a mile before you'd even started. "Hey," you say, knocking your foot against his, "Let's go eat."

He perks up, sparkles glinting in his brown eyes. "Okay!!!"

****

After a few rounds of burgers (Sanji had told you that Luffy "eats meat no matter what regimen I try to put him on"), Luffy and you are sitting in his lavish apartment. He lives here in the city for a few months out of the year, when he trains for most of the days.

"Like it?" Luffy asks, wiping grease off his chin. He has half a burger in his hands, quickly disappearing. You pick at your fries: thick and crispy from the fryer downstairs. Sanji had cooked these in avocado oil for you by hand. Your nerves are keeping you from filling your stomach, though, despite how good the food tastes.

"I do," you hum, crunching another fry in your mouth, "Does he cook for you all the time?"

"Yep!" Luffy happily grins, "I won't eat anything if Sanji didn't make it!"

You raise an eyebrow, thinking of your mac-and-cheese dinners you make out of a box back home. You wrinkle your nose a little, pushing a fry around in some homemade ketchup. It's thick, with a slightly tangy aftertaste. You frown.

"I don't know how to cook."

Luffy grins. "Me neither! But I'll eat restaurant food, or if my friends make food! I love food," he devours the rest of his burger, and closes the paper container Sanji had brought it up in.

"Butterfly Hero," he says with his mouth full, looking at his phone. You see your own profile page on his lit-up screen. How he can stare at the blue light (without any filter) is beyond you.

He flicks his eyes up to you, dark and intrigued. "What's the name for? Why'd ya choose it?"

"I--," you start, then hesitate. "My girlfriend really likes butterflies. And she does this thing every year where she plants seeds for the monarch butterfly migration. It's with the National Wildlife Federation, I think? It's to save them from going extinct."

"Butterflies are extinct?" He tilts his head, scratching his fluffy hair. You shake your head.

"No, but they're endangered, I think. Monarch butterflies are on the red list," you pull out your own phone to Google something. "Blue butterflies don't seem to be that endangered," you muse, "But some are really rare. Can't find a definitive answer, though." You frown, scrolling through a couple pages.

"I like blue butterflies," Luffy says, scratching your knee with calloused hands. He's smiling at you, wide and bright in the setting sunlight. His windows are open, letting the sea breeze drift in from off the coast. It's cool, but not unpleasant.

"Me too," you say, scooting in closer to his heat. His body radiates warmth, like the setting sun itself.

"So, ya named yourself after an endangered species? Because your girlfriend loves them? That's pretty cool," he congratulates you, pulling you into his side with one arm. The muscles flex under his skin, and you flush. He tilts his head back, thinking. "I wonder if I changed my name...what it would be."

"What's your stripper name?" You ask, "It's gotta be powerful, and glamorous. Like you can conquer the world with the name."

He screws his face up in thought, full lips twisting as his brown eyes slide to the ceiling. "...Mars? Or something strong, like that." He taps his fingers against his own knee, drumming thick finger pads against his bronze skin. His legs are long and athletic, toned and tanned, with a fine layer of soft dark hair. There's a freckle under his left knee.

"Mars is pretty cool," you admit, smiling slightly. You pull your own curvy legs under you, leaning against the fluffy pillows. Luffy lays his head on your chest without hesitation. You stroke his hair, soft like crow feathers, and hum softly. "Like the fire motif," you stroke through his thick strands of hair, finding his scalp and scratching at the top of his head. He presses into you like a satisfied cat.

"Hm?"

"Your moves are all fire based, right? Or gun based," you list off your fingers, "Rocket, Red Hawk, Elephant Gun, Bazooka...," you frown, "Well, I guess it's mostly guns. D'ya like guns, or something?"

He punches his fist into the air, flexing powerfully. "My punches are like pistols!" He grins, tilting his fluffy head up to catch your eyes. His are sparkly, like a goddamn Disney prince. You nod.

"They sure fucking are," you admit, remembering the one-hit-knockout he'd slammed poor Koby with. Luffy nuzzles into your chest, wrapping his strong arms around your waist.

"I like you, Hero," he says, muffled by your t-shirt. You'd changed into clean clothes after taking a hot shower in his (luxurious) bathroom.

"I like ya too, Luffy," you hum, kissing the top of his head. Raven hair tickles your nose, and you smell sweat. Luffy had not taken a shower.

His BO smells musky, obviously, but also cinnamon-spicy, like chai tea. Or rooibos tea, you muse, letting your fingers trail down softly to the side of his face. He leans into your touch.

"Hmm," he moans, throaty and unashamed. "Wanna play?" He winks up at you, cheeky, and you grin. You can't help yourself.

"Course," you mumble, and let him shift over you. He hovers on his hands, planking on the bed as you shrink underneath him. You nestle back farther into the pillows, and let him start tugging off your comfy pajama shorts. They have clouds on them: light blue and pastel grey. Your ballet teacher would have called it an ice tone.

Luffy leans down to start kissing your neck, already sloppy with lustful desire. You croon, arching your neck to the side to give him more room. His lips are soft as heaven, and press heat into your skin with every kiss and swipe of his eager tongue. You hum, hands coming up to slip under his own t-shirt, hungrily gripping at his abs as he flexes. He giggles.

"Like my muscles?" He asks cockily, raising a sharp eyebrow. You nod, devouring the sight of his tanned arms as he rips his t-shirt off overhead. He does that hot-guy thing where he pulls it over his head with one hand. You moan, already hot and heavy with need.

"Love em, Luffy," you whine, arching your back up to welcome him back into your embrace. He slides down your torso, leaning his weight fully into you. He braces his arms on either side of your face.

"Love you."

You blush, caught off guard. He's never said that before. "Uh--um," you swallow, stuttering over your words. "Sure?"

He stops, lips paused in an open, half-kiss. His face is inches from yours, and his eyes regard you with a shivering anticipation.

"Sure, what?"

His voice is small.

You swallow.

"You sure?"

He shakes his head, "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Because I love you, too." You say, breathy. Each word is forced out like a stone. "And once I love someone, I don't stop."

"Good."

He presses his nose into your cheek. He inhales deeply, lets it out slow. "Was worried ya didn't feel the same, butterfly."

You shake your head vehemently, the crisp pillowcase shifting beneath your head. Your hair is up in a messy bun, slowly coming undone. Like you. "I love you, Luffy."

He snickers, and kisses your lips.

"Ya better."

#luffy fanfic #one piece fanfic #luffy x y/n #luffy x reader #my writing #dumpster dive #modern au #luffy fluff #luffy x you

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ariadnethedragon · 3 months

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HOFAS thoughts as I read it: (SPOILERS below)

All that t*rture in the dungeons, Ruhn’s piercing and tattoos. Baxian’s tattoo. The wings. “How strong is your bite?” Sarahhhhh!!!!! Stop! That was more than I could handle😫

The Middengard Wyrm😖. Nesta dealt with it brilliantly but it just makes you appreciate how impossible it was that human Feyre managed to kill this thing by herself with no decent weapons.

Azriel hugging Nesta and stroking her hair after she took the Mask off🥺

Bryce’s wallpaper being Hunt and the photo of her friends in the phone case—that made me tear up

Imagining the inner circle all surrounding Bryce’s phone trying to figure out how it works is hilarious. Also Nesta being jealous of Bryce’s music collection, “THOUSAND?”

The nightbright angst KILLED me💔💔💔

Hunt just dreaming of Bryce. She’s the only thing pulling him through, “He’d wanted so many things with her. A normal, happy life. Children.” HE BETTER GET EVERY SINGLE ONE IF THOSE THINGS OR HANDS WILL BE THROWN!

Silene. The Daglan. My theories were true😁😁

Sigrid. I had so much hope for her story but I was disappointed. Hopefully it’ll get better

Ariadne!! I wanted to see more of her😕

Ruhn’s bedroom. The burn cream😭😭😭

Lidia FUCKING Cervos. That breakout scene. Magnificent.

Jesiba and Ithan’s dynamic. Librarian Ithan and the fact that Jesiba is a Parthos priestess!!! Also JellyJubilee being the computer password😂

Bryce using the mating bond to teleport to Hunt😭😭😭

Bran and Ace. Lidia giving them her ruby ring for tuition as a goodbye💔

Hunt and Bryce got married?!!! WHEN?

Cloudberry crown sounds funny idk why

If I had a penny every time SJM included a set of unhinged/partly unhinged fae twins (yes connall I’m looking at you) in her series, I’d have three pennies bc it happens every single time

So the astronomer is basically a Voldemort 2.0

Flynn and dec going crazy for waffles on the mer ship

“I never had anyone fight for me” Oh Lidia my love😭😭

Guess I’m shipping Tharion and Sathia now🤷‍♀️

Lidia being turned on by Ruhn lighting a fire—girl, I get it.

“Because I’m yours, Day. I’m fucking yours.” Screaming crying throwing up

Lidia: “I want you all the time”😭😭😭😭😭😭😩😩😩😩💗💗💗

Idk why but I am disappointed in the Autumn King, I thought there would be some redemption for him for some reason

Ruhn: “I am going to live and I am going to live well without you”😭😭

Bryce was always a queen but now she a queen Queen👀

Avallen becoming all green again.

Hunt being a demonic test tube baby😂😂

Dec being the first to look for service. Typical😂

Ithan x Perry???? Cinnamon and strawberry? I start getting suspicious when they notice all the nuances of that person’s scent. I think they’d be cute though

Nooooo, the prime—I keep thinking of him as master oogway from king fu panda and it makes me sad

Sabines finally dead🥳🥳

Ithan is prime now? Okay okay pop offf!!

Hunt finally breaking free of his halo and freeing Isaiah as well❤️

Is the under king from the ToG universe??? Valg??

Connor💔💔💔😭😭😭 The bullet. Memento mori

Sathia and Colin McCarthy. This will be interesting

Commando Hunt. The underwear was too small🤭🫨🫨

Morven guest room having red lace thongs😂😂

Okay tharion and sathia are really growing on me🥰🥰🥰

‘She’s my mate you fucker’ SCREAAMMING

Ace finally calling Lidia Mom😭❤️

Lidia is the descendant of Brannon. The fire, the hind/sacred stag. OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!

Pollux being incinerated☺️☺️☺️

The sprites and Irithys💗

The kill switch, the godslayer rifle. Bryce just blackholing the Asteri. She is so brilliant and cunning and clever and I love her.

Danika and the pack. Light it up Bryce. I SOBBED

Jesiba crying and then her sacrifice😭😭😭💔💔

Ember and Randal going to Prythian. Randal bonding with Rhys but more importantly Ember and Nesta—I want to cryyyy🥹🥹🥹

Starsword/Gwydion back in Prythian…whats going to happen in ACOTAR 5???

The princes of Hel—you gotta love em

Lidia and Ruhn finally having that beer

Flynn x Perry? Jealous Ithan😏

Syrinx running for his life when Hunt and Bryce share a heated look. It’s nothing new but it cracks me up all the time

Pegasuses in Avallen🥰🥰

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kat651 · 4 months

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Bard x Reader

You walked through lake town with a smile. It was winter and freezing but you didn’t care, you were to happy to care. Sure lake town was a poor place to live but you were happy for reasons even you didn’t know about. You were part elf but not enough that it prolonged your life. You did have healing abilities though. But you swore never to use them even for the greater good.

“Tilda!” You heard a voice call.

You looked over to see a boy staring into a hole where the ice had broke. He was striping off his coat and about to dive in when you beat him to it, diving headfirst into the icy waters.

You saw a body slowly sinking and you reached out, grabbing the girl by the scruff of her coat and swimming back to the surface.

You came back through the hole gasping for air, hauling the girl onto the ice. She was shivering. “Hey look at me, i need you to crawl away from the hole, do you understand, crawl.”

She nodded and crawled to the boy who had called her name.

You pulled yourself out and crawled as well before slowly standing. You placed your hand in your head and moaned.

You looked over to see a tall man with curly shoulder-length black hair wrapping the girl in a coat before the boy lifted her and ran into a house close by.

The man slowly made his way over to you as you trembled. He gently smiled as he guided you off the ice. You trembled and clutched his shirt as he led you into the house that the boy had entered with the girl only moments before.

-.-.-

The next hour was a blur as you warmed yourself in front of the fireplace.

“Thank you for saving me,” the little girl said.

You smiled at her. “It was nothing.”

“No, it was everything,” the man who you knew must be her father said. “I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to repay you,” he said, giving you a warm cup of tea.

“Thank you,” you whispered, taking the cup.

He smiled warmly and you were glad that you weren’t able to blush. He was the most handsome man you’d ever seen.

-.-.-

A month passed and you visited Bard and his family often.

“Y/n!!!” Tilda shouted, knocking on your door early one morning.

You yawned and opened your door. “What is it Tilda?”

Tears were in her eyes. “It’s Da… h-he’s sick.” She whimpered. “Really sick…”

You brought her inside and quickly changed before grabbing your bag of medicines and fallowing her.

She led you to Bard who lay in bed, coughing and taking ragged breaths.

You knelt next to him. “Bard, hey, can you hear me?”

He moaned and nodded.

You placed your hand in the back of his forehead and frowned. “Bain, will you get another blanket? Tilda get a cool cloth please. Sigrid please get your father son tea.” The three children set to work and you whispered for Bard to hold on.

Tilda came to you with a cool cloth and you lay it over Bard’s forehead. “Everything will be ok,” you whispered mostly to yourself.

Bard opened his eyes. “Y-y/n?” He moaned before coughing again.

You gently stroked his cheek with the back of your hand before realizing what you were doing. You pulled away and you watched his lips turn to a frown.

You placed your hand back on his cheek and the frown left, his face relaxing into one of peace. “Y/n…”

You gently shushed him and rubbed your thumb over the stubble on his cheek and he smiled a bit more as he took a ragged breath.

-.-.-

You spent the whole day caring for Bard. His children had all gone to bed and you were sitting on a chair, hovering over Bard as he panted and gasped for breath. His face was pale and sweat was rolling down his face.

You griped Bard’s hand. “Please, come on…don’t die…”

“Bard, bard please, please don’t die. Your children they need you, please, Bard, please…” you let out a sob. “I-I need you…” you whispered. “Bard please.”

His fingers tightened around your hand and he whispered your name. “T-take care of my children, please…”

“Nonononono, bard please, no…”

He panted and squeezed your hand. “Y/n, I’m sorry…”

“No bard please...“ You let out a sob. “Bard please, stay with us…”

He coughed and brought his hand to your face. “Please take care of them for me…”

“No, Bard no, don’t you dare!”

He slowly lowered his hand and you fell to your knees, sobbing into his chest. Your tears soaked his shirt as you begged him to stay alive.

His hand fell upon your head, tangling in your hair. You looked up at him and let out a sob. “Bard I-I love you…”

Bard’s fingers tightened in your hair. “I love you too…”

You slowly lifted your head and placed your hands on his chest, if you were going to break your promise to yourself it would he for him. you closed your eyes as your hands emitted a warm silver light.

Bards breath slowly returned to normal and his eyes opened. “Y/n?”

You fell limp and he sat up, grabbing you. “Y/n?”

You looked up at him. “You’re gonna be…ok…”

Bard clutched your body close and sobbed from shock. “Oh, y/n…” he whispered, pulling you into the bed.

You looked up at him with exhaustion in your eyes. “Please don’t tell anyone…”

He pulled you to his chest and brushed your hair from your eyes. “You saved my life, there must be some way to repay you.”

You let your head fall on his shoulder. “Just let me sleep…”

He gently pulled you into his embrace and you fell asleep nearly instantly but you swore you felt him gently kiss your head.

When you woke you were laying in a bed that wasn’t your own. You sat up and looked around confused. You stretched and stood.

You walked out of the room and into the kitchen. Bard was cooking something and you smiled. “Good morning,” you said.

Bard turned and pulled you into a hug. “Good morning,” he mumbled, kissing your forehead.

You looked at him with a smile. “Good morning, Bard,” you said, kissing his cheek in return.

-.-.-

You sat next to Bard, talking quietly as the two of you ate. The children were still asleep and you thought it would be fair to let them sleep since they were up late helping you take care of Bard.

You took the dishes and went to clean them when you felt two powerful arms wrap around you and then lips press on your neck. You chuckled softly as his lips tickled you. He moved to your cheek, kissing you repeatedly. “Y/n, thank you for everything…”

You turned around to face him and stood on the tips of your toes, pressing your lips against his.

His hands were on your hips and he pulled you closer.

“Da?”

The two of you turned to see Bard’s children standing with wide eyes.

Tilda was the first to react. She ran and threw her arms around you and smiled at her Father. “Is y/n staying with us?”

You smiled at her and Bard bit his lips, looking to his other two children.

Sigrid was the next to walk up and put her arms around you but Bain remained put, jaw dropped.

Bard slowly walked to his son. “Bain… look at m-” he gasped as Bain threw his arms around his father’s middle.

“If your happy I’m happy, she’s a good person…”

You felt tears prick your eyes at his words and walked over to him. “Bain…”

-.-.-

You sat on the sofa with the children, they had all fallen asleep and you were drifting off as well.

That’s when bard came into the house. “Y/n,” he muttered softly.

You slowly stood, trying not to disturb the children.

Bard kissed your cheek. “I’ve something to ask you.”

“What is it?” It had been two weeks since his illness.

The children were suddenly up and standing with their father, huge smiles on their faces.

Bard got on one knee and produced a ring from his pocket. “Will you marry me?”

You gasped and let out a sob before nodding your head. “Yes…”

He placed the ring on your finger before kissing you gently. “I love you…”

You smiled and let your head rest on his shoulder. “I love you too…”

#the hobbit #Bard #x reader #bard x reader #tilda #bain #sigrid #cute #kat651

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leonisandmurex · 7 months

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This is an old news, probably already on Tumblr but i was just thinking about Sigrid, her music and came across this anecdote:

“I was invited to perform with the Norwegian royal family at their castle because they had Prince William and Kate, the Duchess of Cambridge,” says Sigrid. “At the time, I was just so unaware of being an artist or how you are supposed to be in that type of environment. I showed up and it was really cool, and I started to sing. I was honestly s***-faced nervous but I was thinking I have to treat it as a performance.”

Afterwards, Sigrid recalls frantically plugging her breakout song “Don’t Kill My Vibe”, a defiant call to arms about music industry sexism, to each and every person there. The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge were particularly encouraging. “They were so lovely,” she says. “So I invited them to my Shepherd’s Bush show and of course they couldn’t come. But they sent a lovely note. It was like, ‘We can’t make it to the show but thanks for inviting us,’ and then Prince William signed at the bottom of the letter: ‘I have downloaded the album.’” It was 2017 and the album William was referring to was in fact Sigrid’s four-track EP, Don’t Kill My Vibe. [The framed letter from Prince William is in Sigrid's flat]

#I wonder if he still listens to the album?#Its one of my faves #if I could edit I'd choose it & over use it lol🎶#Norwegian royal family #Prince William #Kate Middleton #Princess of Wales #Prince of Wales #Duke of Cambridge #Duchess of Cambridge #BRF #British royal family

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moderarato · 1 year

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@infamous-if OCs 1/? | Sigrid Seymour (she/they) or professionally known as "Seymour", frontman of The Bodega Strays

[How would you describe your music?]: Dreampop with garage and goth influences. Cocteau Twins were quintessential for me growing up. Lyrically, Kate Bush is my goddess. Riveting questions, by the way [eye roll]. Haven't gotten that one in a while.

[Where'd the band's name come from?]: "Okay, that's better, at least. You ever notice how stray cats always end up inside bodegas? I kind of always felt like a stray and this band is kind of like a bodega. Sometimes it's shit [laughs], but it's going to always be there. It's home. Rent-free. And our manager is the shop owner who takes care of us — even though he seems like he doesn't want to."

[Do you own a cat?]: "Yeah, a rescue named Suddenly. Like 'Suddenly Seymour'. Comedy horror musicals are weirdly my guilty pleasure and it's–was–my drunk duet song."

[Who'd you sing it with?]: [Frowns] "Next question."

[C'mon, tell us!]: [Is already tearing the mic off of themselves in a feral rage]

(Off-mic): "Where the fuck are my cigarettes, Orion?! [pauses] [sighs] Pretty please?"

#they're having hidden complicated feelings for Orion but nice moments with Sebastian <3 #another litg oc finally getting the rebranding she deserves!!!#she's been chilling in the basement for sometime #I'm so sorry Siggy I've made you such a mess #rr oc: seymour #rr: edit #rr: moodboard #infamous oc #infamous if #fc: nicole zimmerman #rrq

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mlmxreader · 17 days

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A Beast Of A Man | Bard the Bowman x m!reader

『••✎••』

↳ ❝ Can I request smth fluffy with werewolf male reader x bard (from the hobbit)?

With prompt “Gentlemen like me have to be very careful of what we do and say” ❞

: ̗̀➛ Bard's husband is by no means an ordinary Man, but Bard loves him too much to care anyway.

: ̗̀➛ brief mentions of violence

•───────────────★•♛•★──────────────•

Bard knew where he was going as he travelled down the long, winding path; the slick mud and soaked clay clinging to his boots and making him slip and slide every now and then the further he went.

Following large, stretched paw prints that seemed to have been made by an expert; much larger than a wolf, and far bigger than any warg either.

Unlike the infamous gaurhoth, though, this was a beast turned from Man by infection. A beast that could not speak wolf language, and nor was it constant in its animalistic body. No, this beast stood on two legs like an ordinary Man, yet much taller; it had a long muzzle, adorned with great sharp teeth and shaggy, dark grey fur.

At the end of its long, muscular arms, sat giant paws with thick, sharpened claws. It was as if a wolf had been made to walk on two legs, but with the great strength of the best of Dwarves.

But upon reaching the clearing, and seeing none other than a Man lying down at the end of the pawprinted tracks, Bard smiled; he cleared his throat as he came to sit down beside you, playing his bag beside your bare chest.

He reached out, gently tapping your arm and letting out a sigh of relief when you grumbled and began to stir.

"The children were asking for you," he started, "they asked why you missed out on my birthday party yesterday."

You let out a long, guilt ridden sigh. "Was that yesterday?"

"It was," Bard nodded. "I told them that you were called away, and that you would be back by this evening... they missed having their other father around."

You frowned, chest stinging as you realised the mistake that you had made. "Bard, I-"

"Don't apologise," he told you quietly. "I know how difficult it is to control it... that... infection. I don't blame you."

"No, I know, but..." you slowly sat up, shaking your head. "I promised that I would be there for Bain, Sigrid and Tilda - what will they think of me now?"

"No less of you," he insisted. "You treat them like they're your own, and they know that. It was one birthday, I don't think any less of you."

You glared at him for a moment, shaking your head. "You should. I missed your birthday, I let the children down, I... I fail at everything. Fatherhood, being a husband... a Man."

Bard put his arm around you, shaking his head as he gently kissed your temple. "I don't think you have, at all. You've been a wonderful father, and a wonderful husband. Your affliction doesn't matter."

You leaned into him, humming as you put your arm around his lower back and smiled. "You mean that?"

"Of course," he said softly, kindly. "I brought you some clothes, in that bag. It's my shirt, but I remember Gandalf telling me that men with your infection can be calmed down a little with familiar scents."

"Thank you," you chuckled softly. "But if you want me to wear your shirts, you can just say."

Bard shrugged as he hummed softly, licking his lips. "Well, I've never been the best at lying - you know that."

"And gentlemen like me have to be very careful of what we say and do."

You pulled away from him, aware of his gaze fixated on your body as you pulled the trousers from his bag; quickly tugging them on before sighing heavily. The cloth was warm against your skin, and although you did appreciate his efforts more than anything else, you also couldn't deny that you also appreciated his gaze.

He looked at you like you were fantastic, like you had the combined glory and breathtaking scenes of a woodland in fresh spring rain; like you held the entirety of Middle Earth on your shoulders, willing to kneel and give it to him. He looked at you as if you were his soil, his sky, his water, and his air.

He looked at you like you were everything, and even when you settled yourself on his lap once you were dressed, he didn't look at you any differently.

Slowly, Bard laid his hands on the backs of your thighs, keeping you close as he tilted his head to the side. "Is it at least getting better?"

You nodded, putting your hands on his shoulders as you let out a long sigh. "A little bit. It's been easier to control since Gandalf took me to see Radagast."

"I'm glad," Bard said softly, nodding as he dared to smile. "And the... urges?"

"Not as often, or as powerful," you smiled back, patting his shoulder twice to let him know that you really were quite alright. "Honest, Bard. Thanks to you, I'm all alright - more or less tip top condition. Promise."

Bard held his hand out, waiting for you to link your fingers with his. "Two squeezes?"

You squeezed his hand twice. "Two squeezes."

His shoulders slumped as he let out a drawn out breath, swallowing thickly and daring to smile. "You picked the right place, mind you."

"Pardon?"

"This," he mused. "Isn't it where we first met?"

"You mean where I first saved you?" You asked with a scoff, and when he glared playfully, you shook your head. "Don't be shy, Bard. You can admit you were all but overwhelmed by that warg."

"But I had you to save me," he whispered.

"You always will," you whispered. "I might not be as strong or as fierce as a dragon, but I will always, always protect you and the children. You're..."

"Family?" He asked quietly.

You nodded slowly. "You're my family... and, if you looked under your pillow this morning, you'd find what I made for you."

He tilted his head, curious as he hummed and raised his brows slightly. "Then we best get going and get back home, don't you think?"

You hummed, shaking your head for a moment before pressing your face against his throat. "Now in a minute, eh?"

Slowly, Bard closed his eyes as he fought back the urge to grin. "Alright."

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pollyaunt · 2 months

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My thoughts on HOFAS

-> First and foremost, only SJM can make me violently react towards books even though it's been years since I've started reading and got into the Maasverse.

-> Ch 99 broke me. Literally. I was downright bawling so hard to the point I couldnt breathe especially with the Danika, Lele and Pack of Devils scene. And ofc, Jesiba. I love you sm.

-> Bryce is an absolute badass and I would agree that her and Hunt's relationship wasnt portrayed the best in this book in comparison to the first, but well, the first also focused on the Kristallos as the danger whereas in this book they were the allies. Suffice to say, the degree of change was ought to happen and supposed to be vast. I'm nonetheless very much happy with how both of them turned out to be in the end.

-> Lidia. She's more Aelin than Aelin herself. In this house, we absolutely ADORE LIDIA CERVOS. And her sons and ofc Ruhn. They carried the book most definitely.

-> The ACOTAR x CC crossover was done immaculately and Maas so not deserves the disappointment shes receiving over it especially because be for fuckin real, it had to be more about CC than ACOTAR itself. And I'm honestly very happy with how she portrayed those scenes while remaining true to the characters (besides the bonus chapter which was kinda meh)

-> Tharion Ketos most certainly made decisions that were not the best but dude, you've got to recognise that he was the most selfless one in the entire book all the while trying to keep himself alive. His determination and ambition were honourable. And ps: I havent forgotten how open ended his story has been left especially with Sathia gone abruptly (whom I LOVED) and I think it's kinda pointing at how he and Ithan might get their own novella or book after the next ACOTAR.

-> Last but not the least, Ithan. That dude was trying to the best always yall and lets be honest without him, I highly doubt they'd been able to 1. Get out of the Viper Queen's lair. 2. Been able to defeat the Asteri without that bullet. And they way Maas has left his story along with Ketos' incomplete for now has surely not escaped my notice. After all, we still gotta know what happened to Sigrid really and Sathia 👀

In conclusion, the two things that felt off to me throughout the book was:

-> Firstly, how the Quinlar relationship was written in certain scenes but also, to an extent I also sympathized with both of them given the extent of trauma both of them had been through. It was understandable but comforting myself with the thought that once stuff on Midgard got better, both of them must've discussed it at length cuz, that's what our Quinlar is really. So, I'm not that unhappy with their portrayal and love them equally.

-> Secondly, this one has bugged me a lot in the series: the wasted potential that was Fury Axtar. She could've been SUCH a vital asset to them and all over, one of the most badass character. But instead of explaining and exploring her, SJM made quite a mistake by off writing her mostly from the books. That could've been done better.

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koko-heads · 1 year

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i'd just like to thank my parents, my siblings, God, my friends, pixelberry studios—

#gabe x mc #gabe adalhard #mc: sigrid fraser #choices id #immortal desires #playchoices #choices stories you play #choices stories we play

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dogrotpdf · 1 year

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hey, could you do a web weaving about pain/anger/wanting revenge, and maybe include fire themes or uncertainty about the future? if not that's fine! love your blog btw!

I’M NOT ANGRY ANYMORE. WELL, SOMETIMES I AM

Mother Mother, Burning Pile / Portrait Of A Lady On Fire / Straw House, Straw Dog, Richard Siken / Grief Lessons, Anne Carson / Burning Hill, Mistki / Griff x Sigrid, Head on Fire / @/rbhvleo / Unknown

#web weaving

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guardianofrivendell · 1 year

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One Morning in Laketown...

Fíli x OC Tullaina

Requested: no - requests are closed atm, this was written by me, for me

Warnings: awkwardness, pining, what is that ending though, this is not smutty 18+ but there is some morning excitement going on with Fíli fyi - also, I don’t know what pacing is so yes this feels rushed and unfinished (no pun intended)

Summary: Tullaina is cold, and Kíli thinks it’s the perfect opportunity to help his brother out. At least, that was the plan.

Tullaina fic timeline: between Slippery When Wet and When in Mirkwood - during the Quest

Word count: 1.9k

A/N: I’m alive! After almost 7 months of not being able to finish anything, I managed to get this out of my system. Did anyone ask for this? Of course not (no one’s waiting for OC content) and even I don’t know where it came from, but the idea kept bouncing around in my head so I had to write it down.

This was supposed to be a little haha fic about Fíli’s morning wood poking Tullaina but then somehow I dragged fluff, inner turmoil and a dash of angst into this to even things out I guess. Bon apétit!

Also yes, we can all acknowledge that I’m still bad with titles.

Laketown was grey, wet and cold. Even though the bowman had warned them it wasn’t a comfortable place to be, Tullaina had expected something a little more… dry.

The smell of rotted wood and mold hung heavy in the air as they settled in his living room, irritating her nose and throat and keeping her from taking deep breaths. But Bard’s house was a safe haven, at least for now, a chance to catch their breaths, fill their bellies and dry their clothes, so she shouldn’t really complain .

A warm and hearty dinner made the Company’s good spirits return, and with the mountain now within their reach and their strengths returned through food and rest, the room was filled with excited chatter and laughter.

Tullaina sat with her back against the wall, knees pulled up to her chest and a knitted blanket thrown around her shoulders, watching their merrymaking with tired eyes.

Sigrid had suggested she’d sleep in her room, thinking she could use a little privacy away from her male companions, but Tullaina had politely declined. After what happened in Mirkwood, there was no way Thorin, Fíli, Kíli or any other member of the Company would let her out of their sight, not even for one second. And she felt the exact same way.

As the night progressed, one by one the Dwarves laid down to rest on the hard wooden floor, using the provided blankets and throws and whatever they could find to sleep on. Tullaina quickly followed their example, absolutely exhausted after their escape from the Mirkwood dungeons and travelling to Laketown, with Fíli and Kíli joining her not long after.

But sleep didn’t came as easily as she would have wanted. Despite the room being packed with Dwarves and a Hobbit and a still smouldering fire in the fireplace, she couldn’t seem to get warm. The humid air and the cold had crept into her tired bones, her toes were numb and every inch of skin was prickled with goosebumps. She couldn’t stop shivering, no matter what position she tried to sleep in.

After what seemed like hours of endless tossing and turning, Tullaina rolled onto her side, double-downed and clenched her eyes shut, wishing for warmth and sleep to come at last.

“Everything alright?” Fíli whispered, having noticed her shivering form. He was careful to keep his voice down, not wanting to wake up any of the others. But judging by their loud snoring, it would take a lot more than a hushed conversation to wake them up.

Tullaina pulled the knitted blanket a little tighter around her, and nodded. “Jus’ c-cold, is all.”

Fíli reached out and covered the hand that clutched her blanket, easily enveloping it in his own. “Mahal, you’re freezing!”

On her other side, Kíli turned around so he could face them. “You want my blanket?”

“N-no Kíli, I swear I’m f-f-fine. You need your own b-blanket.”

“Tulls, you’re clearly not fine, I can feel you shaking. Are your clothes dry enough?” Fíli asked, patting down the blanket to see if it turned damp. “Seems okay to me.”

“I told you I’m f-f-fine, Dwarves are warmblooded, I’ll warm up eventually,” she tried to reassure them. If only her teeth would stop chattering so she could actually try to get some sleep…

“That’s it!” Kíli yelled, immediately shushed by his brother, “don’t give me that look Fee, no one heard me. But Tulls is right, we are warmblooded. That’s what she needs, body warmth!”

“So what do you suggest?”

“Isn’t that obvious? See, that’s why I’m the smarter one out of the two of us. Fee, you need to share your blanket! Let her sleep against you so you can share your body warmth, she’ll be fine in no time and then we can all have a good night’s sleep.”

Fíli froze, immediately catching on to what his brother was trying to do and he opened his mouth a few times to say something, too stunned to speak.

Tullaina tried to ignore the stab in her stomach when she realised Fíli was mortified by the idea of sleeping under the same blanket. She didn’t understand, there had been lots of times during the Quest and back home where they’d cuddled close to each other, and for Durin’s sake, when they escaped Mirkwood that morning he couldn’t let go of her, his arm firmly wrapped around her waist for hours after, so why would he be so against the idea now?

“It’s fine, I-I can share with Kíli, I don’t mind,” she quickly suggested, trying to break the awkward tension.

“But I do!” Kíli protested quickly, “no offence Tulls, but I know you’re a heavy dreamer, I’m not looking to be kicked in the shins. Or worse.”

“No, no, it’s fine,” Fíli stuttered after he found his voice again, “I’m sorry Tullaina, of course I’ll sleep with you-”

Both Tullaina and Kíli watched the colour drain from his face as his brain caught up with his mouth. They stared at him with wide eyes while Fíli prayed that the inside of Bard’s house was dark enough so no one could see how flushed he was. “I mean- I don’t… That’s not… I- I’ll shut up now.”

He moved closer towards Tullaina, close enough so he could throw part of his blanket over her but still keeping enough distance between their bodies so his mother would be proud of him.

“Is this okay?” he asked with a hushed voice, “I can move if you want.”

“Fíli, it’s fine, don’t worry,” Tullaina hummed, instantly relaxed by the extra warmth and comfort radiating from him, and she could feel her eyelids getting heavier by the second.

“Now that everyone’s settled and comfortable, can we finally go to sleep?” Kíli’s voice sounded from behind them, and Fíli muttered a good night in return. He noticed Tullaina remained silent, her breathing already evened out. The shivers had stopped, but Fíli still pulled his part of the blanket off of him and covered her with it, keeping none for himself.

It was still early when Tullaina woke up, feeling well-rested and warm. She could hear soft snoring right next to her, and as she slowly opened her eyes, she was greeted with Fíli’s sleeping figure. Their noses almost touched, they were that close to each other and she could feel his breath brush her lips with every sigh.

Even though the room was still shrouded in the night’s darkness she could see the outlines of his face perfectly. His long nose, his moustache braids she knew he was so proud of, the lines around his mouth and eyes - the ones she could read like a map, every little skin crease depicting a different emotion, a different meaning behind them - now smoothed underneath the promise of a safe night. Her fingers twitched, eager to stroke the stray hairs out of his face, his usually well-kept braids untangled, a reminder of their flight from Mirkwood, making him look more like Kíli than he would have wanted.

She shouldn’t.

They were about to reclaim Erebor, their long lost home and it would change everything. But it was their home, not hers.

They were actual royalty for Mahal’s sake, and the closer they came to ending their quest, the more she realised that she was going to lose them. She didn’t belong in their world, or at their side. She, an orphaned daughter of an Ered Luin seamstress and a miner, had no place beside the throne. When everything was over and settled down, she would make the journey back. Alone.

After all, princes didn’t make friends with commoners and they certainly didn’t court or marry them. They would forget her soon enough.

Tullaina sighed and turned on her other side, wanting to put as much distance between them as she could. She shouldn’t think about her goodbyes just yet, they had a dragon to slay first.

Before she was able to inch further away, Fíli grunted and draped a large arm over her middle, pulled her closer and pressed his broad frame against her back. She froze at the sudden proximity and tried to fight her initial reaction of melting into him and folding her arms over his. What would the others think if they woke up and found them like this? Spooning?

But those concerns were quickly pushed to the back of her mind when she noticed something else, something very prominent and very much awake.

She knew what it was, she wasn’t a little pebble anymore, but knowing about it and feeling it pressed against your butt were two totally different things.

Fíli would probably die of embarrassment if he knew and Tullaina was sure she would be right behind him at this point. She tried to carefully squirm her way out of his arms, without waking him up, but his hold on her was too tight. In any other situation she would’ve been flattered, excited even, knowing that he didn’t want to let her go, but now she wished she had accepted Sigrid’s offer.

All her wiggling and squirming to get away only made it worse and Fíli more excited. There was no other option but to wait for him to wake up, hoping none of the others would do so first.

And for once, luck was on her side because a few minutes later, Fíli started to stir. Tullaina patted his arm softly and whispered his name, trying to get him to let go before he realised what kind of predicament he had put them in.

Fíli heard the slight panic and worry in her voice and wrongfully assumed there was danger looming. In an instant he went into full protective mode and pulled her closer against him, tightening his hold on her, shielding her body with his own. He groaned and bucked his hips involuntarily as Tullaina’s body made contact with his hardness, and that’s when he realised to his horror what was going on.

He immediately let her go, his body jolting back as if she’d burned him. By doing so, he bumped into a sleeping Kíli, who was up in a second, startled by the sudden action of his brother. The yelps of both princes alerted Thorin, who was usually a light sleeper, whose movement woke Bilbo and in just a few seconds, the whole Company was awake.

Fíli scrambled to his feet, muttering apologies as fast as he could, not knowing where to look. Tullaina was just as mortified as him, and trying to escape the questioning looks of everyone she quickly excused herself, mumbling something about helping Sigrid with breakfast, even though none of the Bardlings were awake yet.

Kíli and the others watched her dash out of the living room, but no one dared to comment. Thorin eyed his nephews carefully, but decided to let it slide for now. If it was important, they would come to talk to him eventually.

Fíli was still panting and beet red when Kíli came up next to him.

“That went well, didn’t it?” he commented, as they watched everyone getting ready for breakfast, the previous scene already forgotten.

If looks could kill, the youngest Durin prince would’ve died on the spot, twice. Fíli muttered something about needing some air and stomped out of the house into the cold morning air.

Kíli sighed heavily and pouted his lips, looking at the pile of blankets on the ground.

“Another good plan gone to waste.”

Permanent taglist: @roosliefje @kata1803 @entishramblings @artsywaterlily @sleepy-daydream-in-a-rose @marvelschriss @kumqu4t @the-banannah @dark-angel-is-back @the-fandoms-georgie @lathalea @xxbyimm @katethewriter @aredhel-of-gondolin @elvish-sky @moony-artnstuff @kirenia15 @vicmackeybullshxt @hey-its-nonny @beenovel @cassiabaggins @shethereadinghobbit @justfollowtheroad @laurfilijames @fizzyxcustard @brokennerdalert @linasofia @naimadrawsstuff @errruvande @amaryllis23 @enchantzz @narniaandthenorth @sketch-and-write-lover @blairsanne @ruthoakenshield @midearthwritings @alone19-24 @medusas-hairband @ren-ni @kyramaximoff @megnotfound @middleearthpixie @aduialel @tree0frog @trappedinlimbo15 @brethil13

Fíli taglist: @bluewingedangel @spidergirla5 @otakumultimuse-hiddlewhore @clumsy-wonderland @i-always-come-back-xoxo

#fili x tullaina #fili #tullaina #fili x OC #the hobbit #the hobbit imagine #fili durin #fili x reader #the hobbit ones #the hobbit fanfic #guardianofrivendell #lotr #kili #the company #the company of thorin oakenshield

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middleearthpixie · 10 days

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Something in the Night ~ Chapter Twenty

Summary: Following the Battle of the Five Armies, a seriously wounded Thorin Oakenshield returns to Erebor to recuperate and eventually ascend the throne as king. With the deaths of Azog the Defiler and his son, Bolg, Thorin no longer has to worry about the bounty the Defiler placed on his head and can instead concentrate on restoring Erebor to its former glory.

Nina Carren of Esgaroth has one goal—to make Thorin Oakenshield pay for unleashing Smaug the dragon unto her home—where he destroyed the town and killed her family. The Defiler might be gone, but his bounty remains very much in place, and she fully intends to collect on it.

Finally, the opportunity shows itself for her to do just that, only to have it go horribly awry. Wounded and now at his mercy, neither Nina nor Thorin stopped to think what might happen, should things not go quite according to plan…

Pairings: Thorin Oakenshield x ofc Nina Carren

Warnings: None

Rating: T

Word Count: 2.2k

Tag List: @night-ace @way-too-addicted-to-fandoms @asgardianhobbit98 @evenstaredits

@heilith @glassgulls @msjava1972 @dianakc @quiall321

@frosticenow @ruthoakenshield @jotink78 @guardianofrivendell @medusas-hairband

@myselfandfantasy @sazzlep @notlostgnome @knittastically @xxbyimm

@fizzyxcustard @i-did-not-mean-to @mrsdurin @legolasbadass @lathalea

If you’d like to be added (or removed) to the tag list, please just let me know!

Previous chapters can be found here.

Nina couldn't remember the last time it hurt to breathe, and she was ever so thankful when the healer at Erebor made the pain stop. The tube was only slightly more comfortable, but at least she could breathe.

The first two days she was in the infirmary were a blur, as she slept more often than she was awake. But from what she recalled, the healer’s name was Narnerra and she was a dwarf with blonde hair and blue eyes and an easy manner. She didn't seem at all concerned with having a daughter of Man in her infirmary, and neither did her partner, Óin. They treated Nina with courtesy and kindness and Narnerra especially reminded her of her mother, which brought tears to Nina’s eyes her first night there.

The most surprising part of the entire ordeal was Thorin. He’d been to see her several times and there was no sense of anger about him any longer. He made no mention of what happened at Mirkwood, no mention of the bounty, no mention of any of it, which confused her to a certain extent.

But she tried not to dwell on it, and instead concentrated on healing, so she could go back to the flat in Dale, as Sigrid had to be worried about her, and Harald had no idea what had happened, only that she’d stopped coming to work. She only hoped she still had a job when she returned.

Narnerra, however, was not about to let her leave until she was satisfied Nina wasn’t about to drop dead. And that meant remaining in the infirmary until further notice, despite the fact that Nina was so impatient to leave.

On her third day, Nina was relieved to have the blasted uncomfortable tube removed from her side. “I was going mad with that, you know.”

Narnerra smiled as she bandaged the small incision she’d finished sewing. “I know, it’s not the most comfortable thing in the world. But, it’s better than not being able to breathe.”

“That I will agree with. So,” Nina tugged her tunic back down, “does this mean I might be able to return home today?”

Narnerra shook her head. “Not quite yet, I’m afraid. I want to keep an eye out for infection. Another day or so should be time enough.”

Biting back an impatient sigh, Nina offered up a long look. “I really do need to go. It feels as if an eternity has passed since I last saw the sun.”

“Another day won’t hurt.”

“Narnerra.”

“It won’t. But, if you are so impatient to see sunlight, why not go and sit in the courtyard for a bit?”

“A courtyard? You mean to tell me there’s an actual courtyard here?”

“Yes. Come and I will show you.”

Nina slowly swung her legs over the side of the bed. She was still achy, from the battle, from the wound, from the treatment for it, but as she got to her feet, it eased a little. Then it eased more with each step as Narnerra led her out of the private chambers and through the infirmary’s main room.

Several dwarves were there, and she felt their stares as she passed them by. Narnerra led her down the narrow corridor to the door at the end, which opened into a sun-splashed courtyard shaded in one corner by towering oak trees.

“You won’t try to run off now, will you?”

Nina slowly shook her head. “No. I won’t. I give you my word.”

“Very well. Enjoy the sun.”

Nina smiled, pulling away from the healer to step out into the middle of the courtyard. In the distance, a tower of black and gray mottled stone rose toward the sky, but that was the only other structure around her.

The sun wrapped warm arms about her and she lifted her face to it, letting her eyes close as the gentle breeze wafted through her hair. For the first time since Smaug destroyed Esgaroth, she felt at complete peace.

With that, she moved to the wall, sinking onto the warm stone. As she sat back against a stone pillar, she thought she could actually remain right there and be perfectly happy about it.

Thorin stepped out into the courtyard. “There you are.”

“You sound as if you’ve been hunting for me. Where else would I be?”

“Fair question.” He crossed over to where she sat. “How do you feel this morning?”

“Better. Narnerra took out the infernal tube, so now it’s only a bit sore instead of very sore.” She shaded her eyes with one had to look up at him. “And how do you feel?”

“I’m fine. I told you, I had not a scratch on me, thanks to you.”

“I apologize. My memory of that night and the first days here isn’t so clear.”

“Worry not. It seems I owe you my life yet again. I had no idea I was being followed.”

“You owe me nothing,” she said after a short silence, lowering her hand to fold it with her other hand in her lap. “I owe you. I can never make up for what I’d done. What I tried to do.”

With a soft groan, Thorin settled beside her. “No, you don’t. I’ll admit, I was furious, as you know of course, but…”

“But you are no longer?” She turned to him. “Why? By all rights, you should hate me until the day you die. Or until the day I do.”

“That was what I thought at first, but since then, I’ve had plenty of time to think and in truth? You should hate me as well. You have even greater cause to do so. I am responsible for the deaths of your family members, for the loss of everything that you held dear. And when I thought of it that way, I realized, I could not fault you for trying to collect the Defiler’s bounty.”

She could only stare up at him, as if seeing him for the first time. He looked far more serious than she’d ever seen—which was saying something—but it was more than that. As his pale blue eyes met hers, her heart gave a leap. “Thorin?”

“So, why don’t you? Hate me, I mean. I cost you everything. All you did was try to avenge that.”

“I did hate you. I hated you for a very long time and that was why I thought to try to collect Azog’s bounty. I thought it would—that it—” she shook her head—“I don't know what I thought it would do, but I thought it would make it, I don't know, hurt less, perhaps?”

The wind stirred again, riffling through her hair, sending his fluttering as well. She managed a slight smile. “But, in the end, it wouldn’t have. It still hurts. It will always hurt. Killing you wouldn’t have changed that, nor would it have brought them back. And besides,” her smile grew easier to show, “I’ve grow fond of you.”

“Fond of me.” A hint of amusement crept into his voice and the corners of his lips turned upwards.

“All right, perhaps a bit more than fond,” she admitted. “Either way, I couldn’t do it. I just… I couldn’t. But, at the same time, I think I—”

His hand came to rest atop hers. “You think what?”

“I think I might have led the orcs to you. I—I went to see Tarog, Azog’s heir apparent, to try to claim half the bounty up front.” Heat crept into her cheeks, swirled through her entire body as she met his gaze again. He said nothing, his expression remained neutral, but she felt so very guilty for everything that happened up to that point.

Still, she went on, “It was arrogant of me, and foolish and he let me know he shared that sentiment. He laughed me out of his camp and that was that. I thought nothing of it, but now, I think he most likely set that orc pack after me, thinking I would lead them to you.”

“You’ve much to learn in being a bounty hunter.”

He said it softly, but with a smile, and it was so unexpected that she couldn't help but laugh, only to clap her hand over her mouth as she stared up at him. “I’m sorry.”

“Why? You said nothing wrong. It’s true.”

“I know, but,” she lowered her hand, “I have no desire to be a bounty hunter any longer. I’m not very good at it, you know.”

His eyes softened.”Is that so?”

“It is, yes.”

“Then what would you like to be?”

“I haven’t the foggiest.”

The hand that had been resting against hers came up to curve against her cheek. As he leaned in, her heart sped up, and when he nuzzled her, her eyes closed of their own. His touch was so gentle and yet, it shot through her like a lightning bolt.

She turned toward him, her lips seeking his, his whispered, “Nina…” making her heart beat faster still.

“There you are! I’ve been going mad searching for you.”

Thorin jumped back at the unexpected female voice and Nina swallowed hard at the dark-haired dwarrowdam in the doorway. It was the same woman she’d seen with him at the tavern and although she smiled, Nina saw the definite coolness in her dark eyes. “Oh, well, good afternoon,” she said, her voice warm and almost syrupy sweet. “I don't believe we’ve met.”

Nina almost smiled at the fact that the woman did not remember her from only a few nights past, but then thought better of it. “No,” she replied, “I don't believe we have.”

“You might introduce us, Thorin,” the woman told him pointedly.

Thorin rose and turned toward her. “Elisin, this is Nina Carren. Nina, this is Elisin of Ered Luin.”

“A pleasure,” Elisin said.

“Likewise.”

Looking up at Thorin, Elisin said, “I thought we were going to have luncheon together?”

“Ah, yes, I apologize. I just came to check on Miss Carren. She came to my aid on the road from Dale the other evening.”

“She is the one?”

“I am, yes.” Nina replied, also rising. “And if you will both excuse me, I think I will go and lie down a bit. My incision is beginning to ache.”

She forced a smile as she looked over at Elisin. “It was lovely meeting you.”

The smile she received in return was just as frosty. “Likewise.”

Nina brushed by Elisin and as she reached for the door handle, she’d swear she could feel the dwarrowdam’s eyes burning into her back. What was more? She could almost feel the daggers in the woman’s stare.

“You traveled with her all the way from Rivendell?”

Thorin nodded, turning back to Elisin as the door swung shut. “We crossed paths on the road leading to it, when she came to our aid.”

“Your aid? A lone woman?”

He nodded, not at all inclined to give more details than was absolutely necessary. “She was quite impressive, really. So, when she offered to accompany us back, Dwalin and I saw no reason to turn her offer down.”

“No, why would you?” Elisin’s voice remained light but he did not miss the darker undertones. “Why do I feel as if I’ve seen her before?”

Before he could answer, she waved off her own question. “Oh, never mind. It hardly matters as I assume she will be leaving before long. I’m actually quite surprised Narnerra did not put up a fuss over having her here.”

He was as well, although he assumed it was because he was the one who brought Nina to Erebor’s gates, to its infirmary, and no one in their right mind was going to question the king about it. He almost smiled at the memory of how Grelber’s eyes went wide at the sight of him, streaked in Nina’s blood, ordering the gates of Erebor be opened at once.

“She is a healer and looks beyond a body’s origins. In the aftermath of the Battle of the Five Armies, I’m told we had elves, Men, and dwarves in the infirmary and all received the same standard of care.”

“Of course they did. I expect no less from her or Óin,” Elisin replied, tucking her arm through his. “I certainly didn't mean to imply otherwise.”

He nodded. “Of course not. So, you said you were looking for me?”

“Oh, right. I was. I thought we might go—”

“Thorin?” Balin appeared in the courtyard doorway. “We’ve a bit of a problem in Esgaroth and Bard has asked we meet to discuss it?”

“A problem?” Thorin pulled away from Elisin. “What sort of problem?”

“The missive did not say.”

“Very well.” Thorin let out a slow sigh as he turned back to Elisin. “I do need to tend to this, I’m afraid. Can what you wished to ask me wait for a bit?”

Elisin didn't look at all happy even as she nodded. “Of course it can. Go. A king’s work is never done.”

“We will talk later, when I return.” He started toward Balin.

“Yes, but Thorin—”

“Later. I promise.”

#Richard Armitage #AU #The Hobbit #Thorin Fic #Thorin Oakenshield #Is it hot in here?#Hobbit Fic #Romance #Hobbit Fanfic #Thorin x OC #Fan fiction #The Hobbit fan fiction

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