#put this on my tombstone for cause of death actually

[htub]

I think what's really most painful to me about Lex's treatment is how much I see myself in him tbh. Putting this baby under a cut to be polite but the last post i reblogged illicited Thoughts and I'm being very autistic about this rn.

I don't wanna get too personal but I also don't actually care so just look. Look. He's just like me fr. This boy's been fucked over constantly from childhood but he's trying, he's trying so hard and so much. And yea, my mother died when I was a kid and left me to be raised by an abusive father, and I got bullied by my classmates, my teachers, even my goddamned therapists that were supposed to help me not make me worse. I swear I'm not trying to make this a sob story, I'm just saying my life was Not Fun, alright? I was just straight up not having a very good time. And one day years ago I just decided this sucks, people suck, and well I want it to be better and for that someone's gotta start. I don't ever want to make anybody feel the way I felt, the way people made me feel, so I'm choosing to do better because this cycle ends with me. So I'm actively trying to treat everyone how I want to be treated, even if they don't do the same, but a lot of times - most of the time - they really do not to the same so it's honestly pretty one-sided and not that peachy. Though thankfully I got no aliens gaslighting me yet, I think. Probably.

Still I'm nowhere near as good as Lex, and my god do I want to be like him, and obviously I also lack the money and influence he has, but I very much try. As much as I hate to admit it, I actually take after my dad a lot, and people even comment on how alike we are when they meet us together, but my dad's an asshole and doing better is a choice. A choice I actively make every day, because it's not how I was raised and not my instinctive behavior. I honestly was raised to be a piece of shit. And it's not always easy, and what I'm trying to say with this incoherent rambling is just, I get it. I get it way too much.

Normally this is why I'm drawn to Superman as a character, because he's got the same goodness I hope to have as well, the same kindness and forgiveness and just love. I'm getting the symbol tattooed on my arm for crying out loud. It's important to me.

But Smallville is really wanting to hurt me in different ways so they're instead giving me someone who's much more like me in backstory and personality and then they're making me watch him get broken into pieces, and there's no happy ending. Knowing there's no happy ending is the worst part. Normally fiction is an escape from reality, but this time it's too realistic, because yep, that's what the world does. It fucks us all over with no mercy, but that's not what I want to see! I want to see this boy be loved! And knowing I won't get that sucks.

And I'm still gonna be the best I can be even if I know the world's definitely headed downhill, because that's the kind of person I want to be, but the hopelessness and despair that comes with watching Lex's character arc is truly a new level of anguish I've received from a damn TV show. Congratulations on that, Smallville. I guess. At whoever was in charge of this, I hope you'll be pleased to know my therapist asks about this damn show every single week, unprompted. He's got it written down in his notes and everything. Probably not the most healthy reaction to a two decades old tv show? But like, I got all the DVDs. I cherish them. I love this show. Don't know if I'll ever actually watch it because it clearly is not good for my mental health but I love it. I hate it too. It just didn't have to go there, you know? That was just low.

#two talks #this might read as a vent?? #it's really just me voicing my thoughts but i do it in a very autistic manner lmao #mmmh oversharing #i know it's bad but it feels so good #i almost wish i'd never discovered this show because now that i have i will never be the same again #but at the same time a piece of me would be missing #ah the duality. ah the pain #happy to report that after 4 months of starting this show I still think about Lex every day! #and it has not stopped hurting!! #but actually the obscene amount of suffering i am experiencing is at comedic heights so at this point at least it's fucking funn #funny* #like man this got me FUCKED UP but i'm still realistic enough to comprehend how utterly NOT NORMAL a reaction that is #so like. lmfao rip i guess. cause of death: saw smallville #put that on my tombstone

[smok3r7]

MAIN MASTERLIST

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Here's the link to my Ao3 also

- Joel Miller Stories -

Latching On To You (finished)

| Joel Miller x F!reader

Series summary: What happens when, after thirteen loving years of being with Joel, you start to feel like he’s slipping away from your grasp? How much of yourself will you lose because of the trauma your father put you through at such a young age? You could be wrong about Joel, but something is telling you otherwise - or are you just not healed enough to see past your own insecurities?

Is Leaving Even An Option? (finished)

Joel x F!reader

EXTREME TW: Extreme domestic abuse (verbal and physical), PLEASE READ WARNING BEFORE READING!!

Summary: Your days have become one in the same - even with the terrifying reality of death right outside the walls of Jackson, being home is evidently worse. You never thought you’d be in the situation you’ve been stuck in for seven years now, the daily abuse you endure has become an expectation. You take whatever your husband throws at you, literally and figuratively, because you’ve been trained to believe this is normal. But a new man, Joel, moves next door and happens to be friendly towards you, this causes your husband’s anger to worsen. Your mind starts a gruesome war with itself - can you leave him or do you stay until the inevitable happens?

One Door Closes & Another One Opens (ongoing)

Joel Miller x OFC! Divorce Attorney

Summary: She’s a divorce attorney and he’s a husband looking for help to save his daughter, and himself, from his gambling addict wife. Renae Russo is a woman who fights for her clients and wins. She’s satisfied with her life and what she does - but she wishes she could have a little more. What happens when Joel Miller becomes her client and she gets to see this man fight for the safety of his ten year old daughter, Sarah. Will she be able to keep it professional? For her sake.

Christmas Getaway (One-Shot)

| Joel Miller x Softball Coach!F!reader

Summary: You met Joel by coincidence. You picked up a little side job to be a high school softball coach for fun, and Sarah was one of your top players. Sarah introduces you to Joel after the first game and both of you hit it off immediately. The three of you grow closer throughout the year and end up spending the holidays together on a getaway trip. Joel treats you to a nice night.

Three, Two, One - Draw! (One-shot)

Cowboy Joel x F!reader

Summary: In Tombstone, you’re the bartender at Wyatt Earp’s saloon, a favorite actually. You’re one of the fastest shooters in the west, having learned from the best - your brother, Doc Holiday. One night after your shift at the saloon, your husband Joel Miller, tells you he wants to practice your draw speed. However, he’s not talking about guns.

New Traditions // Valentine’s Day (One-shot)

Joel Miller x f!reader

Summary: The last Valentine’s Day two years ago has shattered your view of the so-called holiday. When Joel brings up the idea, you shut him down immediately, but he doesn’t listen. He hopes he can change your opinion on the holiday of Love.

————————————

- Aaron Hotchner Stories -

They Always Come Back (Ongoing)

Aaron Hotchner x f!reader

Explicit, 18+

Summary: You and Aaron met in college, Criminology Major, funny enough. Throughout your five years at George Washington College, you and Hotchner had this on and off again relationship; it was all fun until you started to realize that you loved him. After graduation the two of you cut ties and left it as dumb college love, going your separate ways. After a couple decades you finally land your dream job, a seat at the BAU; however when you notice the name copied on the email, you can’t believe your eyes.

#joel miller #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel miller x you #joel miller fanfic #latching on to you #joel miller series #pedro pascal #aaron hotchner x you #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner fanfiction #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotchner #aaron hotch x you #criminal minds #one shots #series #joel miller imagine #joel miller au #joel miller fic #joel miller and OC #joel miller x oc #joel miller x original character

[lucienne-thee-librarian]

More fic recs for DESIRE. Here we go!!!

Gen fics:

For I Loved You Once by locamohita is one of my favorites of all time because of the relationship between Dream and Desire. Like its if these two followed that scene in the Threshold up with trying to actually communicate except because it's Dream and Desire they're both absolutely shit at not pissing each other off. At least at first. Like, it NAILS these two better than most fics ever could and has them act exact way that they ARE Fucked Up Insane but it makes the rare moments of honesty and attempts to listen feel so much more real. It's frustrating and sad and hopeful and perfect in the BEST way.

Quicker and Easier by @zorawitch a human au that still manages to be an absolutely incredible character study of the twins and how deeply entwined they are on a cellular level.

You Were My Whole World (And You were Up and Gone) also by zorawitch features the death of the first Despair and how Desire is (not) coping. Like at all. Predictably, this is pure poetry and also you will cry.

Desire x reader fics:

These are SO FEW it makes me want to cry. It feels wrong on a cosmic level, but they do exist and there are some I can happily recommend but it's a short list.

You Know Me by @sometimesraven is super sweet and fluffy, Something More is a lot sadder but the writing is devastatingly good.

the screams of a ravished deer by thefudge - not super NSFW, but pure dreamy sensuality with an edge of danger, absolutely lush writing

Finite by lis-likes-fics - definitely NSFW, I cannot overhype this. If you're 18+ Go. Read it. Right tf now. Everything about this sucked me in (pun intended) from the beginning and the reader character has like. An actual interesting backstory that doesn't need to break immersion. The smut is GOURMET.

Red Thoughts also by lis-likes-fics PWP that is...ummmgood. Put this on my tombstone as my cause of death 😳🔥

Desire x Corinthian

A Failure of Gravity by Mare_Adamantis both this pair and Corintheus and it is. 11/10 weird smut and Angst and Feelings because of course...the Corinthian knows what he wants, Desire wants a toy...the writing and characterization are note perfect. And Jessamy makes an appearance!!!

(Wild thing) I think I love you (But I wanna know for sure) So come on, hold me tight, I love you by dancinbutterfly is part of a (sort of) human au but you can read this one on its own. It's just delightfully hot smut and yet so note perfect.

#my overlooked fic recs #the sandman #I knew queue would return

[ownerofthisaccount]

You know something that slightly annoys me? When a lot of people say if we get a Unova Legends game or BW3(which is what I want) that Emmet would be the villian trying to bring Ingo back. I don’t really like this for two reasons. The first is that it feels too similar to original Lusamine just with him sticking with the goal. The second is though he can be blunt, he cares too much about others that I wouldn’t see him risking everyone even if it was for Ingo.

But there’s been an idea in my head for a while(two actually. The other as I said briefly before being Ingo becoming a rock/ghost, perhaps from possessing and breaking apart his tombstone to form pieces of outer casing to make a form. I just haven’t drawn that since I’m not exactly sure how I would behind the pieces of rock and his legs forming tails) that I think is a lot more interesting.

Basically in my head, this takes place years after Ingo disappears into Hisui. Emmet instead of going bad decides to use his strengths at battling to become Unova’s champion to both protect others from this happening and try to figure out what happened to Ingo. Meanwhile, a mysterious figure wearing a mask and leading a team starts to cause trouble in Unova and seems determined to take the dragons for their own, making some wonder if Plasma has risen again. I see Emmet having a more active role than most champions due to his past and his want to protect the region. When the masked leader is eventually cornered, the protagonist and Emmet find out that this man is Ingo, but it’s not a happy reunion. Due to his missing memories and things like his possible death in the past, his soul slowly became corrupted and desperate. Having been around for a long time, he saw the dragon before the split, and for a moment felt like it was helping him regain his missing pieces(unbeknownst to him, he was actually getting that feeling from the black and white twins) but it faded just as quickly. Though he was initially willing to let things go, when he learned others suffered the same fate he had he decided he couldn’t just wander in the shadows. He wanted to bring back that dragon with the hope of gaining the truth about himself and save everyone from going through what he had to. Meanwhile Emmet is unable to let Ingo put everyone they care about at risk and reluctantly fight him with his ideals, like the original twins did all those years ago. He will be able to break through to the ghost and bring Ingo’s mind back, but that’s a bittersweet note as Ingo is put to rest and leaves Emmet a second time, this time for good.

I don’t know, it just feels like pinning the two together to re-enact what happened with the original dragon splitting could be a cool way to end off the Unova Trilogy, and it just makes more sense to me for Ingo to be the antagonist due to corrupting after death while still having a pure goal than Emmet betraying what he stood for. Obviously some of this can be fine tuned but who really knows what will happen in the future, I just hope something(also I kinda just want to fight a ghost? We got Marowak but I mean a ghost trainer. There’s a lot yet none are fightable).

I hope you all enjoy this! Have a great rest of your day

#agnst #pokemon ingo #art #artists on tumblr #pokemon #pokémon fanart #submas #submas fanart #au idea

[ludinusdaleth]

I think I'll go for 4, 5 and 24—dealer's choice as to which of Artagan, Ludinus or Ira (or any npc, really. They don't get enough love.)

oh you have no idea the can of warms you've opened, lol.... i will happily do all 3!

this got so long i actually had to put a read more:

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

artagan - it isnt media per say but i really want to set him loose in our own reality and see what he'd do (there have been some hints i think, if half-jokingly said, that hes been here - boy do i think about that often.)

ira - we really should just let him star in his own horror movie. you could put him in a guillermo del toro film, and no one would bat an eye.

ludinus - i want to see how lud would react to faerun. a world so close to his own, but where the weave of magic is directly controlled by a god. there is an odd dichotomy in that faerun is more controlled than exandria and yet breaking that universe's laws are infinitely easier, and i think he would fall into obsession with that.

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

so.... im gonna (un)ashamedly plug my playlists for them here.... please ignore that they can go as long as twelve fucking hours.... ill try to narrow down specific songs that REALLY hit about them, though.

artagan - "within you" by david bowie, from labyrinth, is a perfect fit. not only is arti based on jareth but the song's meaning directly ties into him & jester. jareth is terrified of being nothing more than a lost concept, a lost celebrity crush made fae king, as sarah is metaphorically maturing. "how you turn my world, you precious thing/You starve and near exhaust me/Everything I've done, I've done for you/I move the stars for no one..." i mean, c'mon. "family of me" by ben folds, "celebrity status" by mariana's trench, "lapis lazuli" by the oh hellos, and "due west" by kelsey lu also really hit as arti songs for me.

ira - "mad iqs" by i dont know how but they found me is a really good song for ira's hatred of ludinus. "a mask of my own face" by lemon demon is self explanatory and far too specific, due to his fascination with ashton's mask of him, with the song mentioning "dancing with all the bells". he would go wild for and try to emulate "thriller" by michael jackson or "i cant decide" by the scissor sisters.

ludinus - if i did a speedpaint of lud, id set it to "science fiction" by church of the cosmic skull. "and all the people, they stood on their chairs, and they stared, at the man with the silver hair/taken the findings of the science man/raising his hands to the air!/so he's making the minds up of the millions, and they'd never deny that he's right/cause he's taken a prize of many a size/if ever he dies he'll have a tombstone of a very high height". "brutus" by the buttress is ABSOLUTELY a ruby vanguard trio song and i even used it in my art of them before. "all history is vengeance" by brad derrick from the eso soundtrack is what goes through my head at the malleus key. "blood upon the snow" by hozier & "never look away" by vienna teng also really work for him. i think "survivors guilt" by emily axford (yeah, prism) also has lyrics FAR too tailored to him - "i see you in my dreams/young, and brave, and pre-calamity/i will tell you a story/i will be the voice you lost too soon/because even in your absence, even in your death/im still your moon".

24. What other character from another fandom of yours that reminds you of them?

(i wouldnt say im in the fandoms for all of these, but)

artagan - i think it somewhat obvious he's based off of jareth in labyrinth - his voice is basically david bowie's singing voice. to a lesser but still strong degree he's very much marvel's loki, down to the voice - if, honestly, an infinitely better take on the trickster god. as a past extreme loki fan the pipeline is there for sure.

ira - ashley said she & matt based fearne's story off a guillermo del toro film and i can see that in many fae this go-round, especially ira. he is basically a doug jones character. it's very easy to compare him to creepypastas like the russian sleep experiment or slenderman, too.

ludinus - he has some heavy similarities to emperor belos of owl house, vyrthur of tes, prince nuada from hellboy, and other characters who fit the archetype of a white-haired, ancient, pale elven (or elven passing) man, from a different time, who murders & (in some cases) colonizes to exact vengeance on gods, humans, or similar entities he feels have destroyed those around him. characters clearly in the wrong but who do bring up important topics of the endless cycle of brutality they were caught in, mixed with their privelege in every other circumstance. he also reminds me of mannimarco of tes. they look exactly alike and both shadow run an empire, somewhat in cahoots and yet at odds with a balding white haired pale human man within that same empire. oh! and fëanor from the silmarillion.

thanks for asking! sorry this is so long, floodgates are opened when i discuss men i wish were my fictional partners, lol.

#asks #van speaks #(for too long) #music #ira wendagoth #artagan #ludinus da'leth #critical role #long post

[albaqae]

It is 12:30 in October 28th, and I just finished watching the fnaf movie and, as routine, I feel an urge to infodump :)

SPOILERS FOR FNAF MOVIE UNDER CUT!!!! Everyone who also watched it remember to correctly tag so that ppl can block it!!!

Really recommend to watch first cause it was nice to watch :) even if not PEAK storytelling IMO IMO IN MY FIRST IMPRESSION OPINION DONT JUMP ME

Ok so it was odd??? A lot of the lore kinda got messed up in translation, but I can’t help but feel so grateful anyways???

Ngl I would’ve probs shit on the movie if it wasn’t for my friend who, in a convo, mentioned how sad he was that everyone hated the red eyes cause “we’ve been waiting so long, why does it matter they got red eyes?”

Bc of this I gave it a shot, and it was not bad.

I was scared of how it’d turn out just bc the fnaf lore is SO much that even SCOTT HIMSELF doesn’t know where we at, but for the amount of info they were dealing with, they decided to kinda maneuver in their own iteration of it (imo) which wasn’t completely hate-able and I think it was a pretty good course of action

I liked references to the og lore (

-Vanessa’s coma at the end

- how foxy is the most OUT TO GETCHA

- the afton death scene was PEAK IMOOO “I always come back” like mk girll 💅

- also the whole set was actually fire

- telephone guy even if he wasn’t red ;(

- constant mention of exoskeletons and spring trap mechanisms

- BALLOON BOY THE ONLY THING THAT ACTUALLY MADE ME JUMP

- ITS ME WRITTEN IN THE WINDOW YESSSSSSSAAAAA

- the children inside the suits detail had me like YESSS

- funky electricity

- BALLPIT SCENEEE

- the bite even if it was her whole ass fucking torso

- the cupcake cool

- Vanessa inclusion and her relation to afton

- etc other things I can’t remember)

ALSO MATPAT CAMEO????? HELLO???????? ITS JUST A THEORY???? I also found out my brother does not know who he is and that was SAD. It’s ok ima show him tmrrow :D

Also also the effort put into the ACTUAL ANIMATRONICS, I was actually so shocked I was so ready to just accept it was all gonna be sfx and green ppl but they actually BUILT it, and that materialization just made it that much better for me like watching it and realizing wo man this is insanee

Just thinking how it was such a tiny project and then it just BOOM and here we are???? Omaiga. It rlly motivates u to get out there, no?

I loved them pushing the boundaries of where the animatronics could go w golden Freddy, even if he got me SO confused lore wise like wait y r u here? same for the weird kill freddy mask like hello???

IT MADE ME SO HAPPY HAVING THE TOMBSTONE SONG THEREEEEE YIPEEEEE

Music wise it was so cool too like it was pretty preppy and happy like kids parties and even in normal scenes (e.g. him picking up sleeping pills) it kept the mood up

I didn’t like the career dude being afton, but he was suspicious and i knew smth was gonna happen so ig not out of the blue, but I do like how it kinda went full circle

I am still confused abt Vanessa, but not overly so it’s ok

I actually cried when Abby and the animatronics became friends I was so happy, it got taken away but alas it is fnaf :)

We love the undiagnosed PTSD of the characters

I was bummed when it didn’t close out w the scene where the animatronic heads where no longer have a light behind them (meaning they’ve moved on) I honestly think it would’ve been such a COOL way to close it out but I was not the producer and maybe they plan to continue it??? Continue the curse of too much lore??? That’d be hilarious actually

I’m sad abt how dirty michael gets done through most of the movie like hes just doing his best stopppp

It’s just first impressions, and I’m VERY outdated w the lore, but I like ranting and tumble lets me so I do it :) lmk ur thoughts too!!!!

#I’m also v happy I watched it w my brother #fnaf #fnaf spoilers #fnaf movie #fnaf movie spoilers #fnaf analysis #fnaf movie meta #fnaf movie analysis #fnaf lore #fnaf meta #alba analysis

[actuallyunreal]

Sorry if this has been asked before, but do u have any songs u associate with ur versions of the ew guys?

ahoy there! what a fun question!! :D :D :D

so i actually have a playlist for my au at least with a couple songs for each character. :3 i have to add some for the neighbors, but hey :3 (uhhh it dawned on me that you just asked for them in general and not specifically my au but honestly? i dont make too much of a distinction - but still, my bad!)

fun tip: everyones got at least one song from death of a bachelor by p!atd but i didnt put them all on the playlist because then it would be like…. 90% p!atd and thats just silly

anyway heres my ~best of~ picks or whatever!

OH ALSO if youre not into 💔😈garbage weepy edgy boys😈💔 i would not recommend reading further <3 i love silly boys but my song picks are always dramatic because i have no self control. 😊

edd: my ordinary life - the living tombstone; They tell me that I'm special, I smile and shake my head I'll give them stories to tell friends about the things I said They tell me I'm so humble, I say, "I'm turning red" They let me lie to them and don't feel like they've been misled They give so much to me, I'm losing touch, get me? Served on a silver platter, ask for seconds, they just let me wrecking ball - mother mother; It takes a dedicated hand To put it through the wall You gotta wanna break the heart Of all those pretty porcelain dolls You gotta want to be the drummer in the band You gotta want to be a battering ram You gotta see the artistry In tearing the place apart with me baby dont threaten me with a good time - p!atd Champagne, cocaine, gasoline And most things in between I roam the city in a shopping cart A pack of camels and a smoke alarm This night is heating up Raise hell and turn it up Saying "If you go out you might pass out in a drain pipe" Oh, yeah, don't threaten me with a good time

tom: bad decisions - redhook; Okay, now please don't think I'm tryna glamorise all of the shit that I despise about myself 'Cause my mental health is tenuous at best from all the pressure and the stress of other people's expectations I'm crushed by the weight, so I self-medicate to escape Then I just make more mistakes, can't break this stupid cycle of self-hate dread in my heart - mother mother; Oh I wonder what it's like to be the type who doesn't burn Ya the kind who fights the good fight Not the kind you'll find fisti-fuckin-cuffin' in the dirt death of a bachelor - p!atd Do I look lonely? I see the shadows on my face People have told me I don't look the same Maybe I lost weight, I'm playing hooky with the best of the best Pull my heart out my chest, so that you can see it too

tord: heroes - emmy curie; So you wanna be the hero, kid, be adored by everyone 'Cause no one can forget you when you're the reason they have won You want the fame, the attention, but more than anything You're scared of fading to the background like you didn't mean a thing anime intro - public theatre; I couldn't help but notice your under eyes You were looking pretty skinny last night Are you even fighting I couldn't help but notice your little lies You keep saying that you'll be just fine Are you even trying Anymore now house of memories - p!atd Baby, we built this house on memories Take my picture now, shake it 'til you see it And when your fantasies become your legacy Promise me a place in your house of memories

matt: emperor's new clothes - p!atd Welcome to the end of eras Ice has melted back to life Done my time and served my sentence Dress me up and watch me die If it feels good, tastes good It must be mine Dynasty decapitated You just might see a ghost tonight Double, double, double down And if you don't know now you know inferno - rain paris; Terribly terrible, she's a villain One as sweet as caramel, she's my saint Think I'm getting butterflies, but it's really Something telling me to run away

#grim au

[turqrambles]

I Read A Berenstain Bears Book Where They Fight Joe Camel, Make Fun of Liberal Activists, and Discuss Farmer’s Rights

Who doesn’t love the Berenstain Bears? They’re named things like “Papa Bear”, whether they’re called Berenstain or Berenstein has been cited as a commonly found instance of the Mandela effect, and one time they ate a bunch of tasty junk food in that one book that everyone only remembers because the illustrations look cool.

Actually, I don’t love the Berenstain Bears. If I had to make a tier list of family friendly forest critters, I’d put them right at the bottom tier underneath characters like Buttons & Rusty and Yogi. I could probably take on both Brother and Sister Bear in a fight if I had to.

I do, however, know an awful lot about these horrible mammals, probably because I read weird books like this. Follow me in my journey through The Berenstain Bear Scouts and the Sinister Smoke Ring, their anti-smoking PSA. It’s a journey that gets weirdly Libertarian!

I reread this book because, by sheer happenstance, I knew two friends besides me that read this book as a kid so I had to report back and read "The Berenstain Bears Book where they fight Joe Camel" just to see if it contained any buried treasure.

At first glance, this book's contents seem easy to guess. It's a chapter book about the Berenstain Bears, and their lesson for the day is "smoking will destroy you mind body and soul". It's not a book you would read for fun, oh no. This is a book that's given to you by a parent or a teacher to teach you a hard life lesson before you ruin your tender developing lungs in a middle school bathroom after the cool kid with all the piercings dares you to.

For the most part, the book is exactly that. We get the peer pressure from the gang of cool kids - named the Too-Tall Gang, and their clubhouse is made out of stolen car parts because they're COOL - and we even learn that Brother Bear has been hanging out with them and smoking for a bit (which, sadly, is never seen in any of the illustrations, probably to preserve the branding) and doing things like hiding his smoke-smelling clothes from his parents, all while his sister watches on in mute horror.

Later on, as the adults are telling him not to smoke, he even gets to visit a cemetery while an old grandpa bear tells him that his loved ones smoked themselves to death.

(almost every tombstone is a bear pun)

See, that part is fine. That is a fine lesson to learn. If this book just kinda kept to that tone of storytelling - maybe have Brother Bear's health start to be negatively affected by this, maybe deal with the psychological effects that smoking does to the brain - then maybe it wouldn't be the absolutely bonkers product that I subjected myself to.

Oh no, instead this book slides off the rails by making the Bear Scouts deal with all levels of tobacco production, and the cracks really begin to show during the part in the beginning where we have to spend time with Farmer Ben, who called the police on some protesters marching on his farm because he decided to grow a bunch of tobacco plants on a completely random whim.

(...)The scouts were in an awkward position. They knew that smoking was very bad for your health. But Farmer Ben was a friend of theirs. After all, it was Ben who let them convert his old chicken coop into a clubhouse.

He turned to Ben. "Ben, you're right about one thing. They may not come onto your property. That's trespassing. But if they stay on the road, they can protest all they want. It's called Freedom of Speech." He turned to the protesters. "Miss Stickler, you and your protesters are right about tobacco and smoking. It causes death and disease. No question about it. But it's a legal crop, and Ben has every right to grow it if he chooses to!"

Okay. We need to slow down here.

This book, this children's book designed to tell children that smoking is bad and will kill you, felt the need to spend some time with a tobacco farmer and let everyone know that it's well within Farmer Ben's right to grow a bunch of tobacco plants because tobacco is a legal plant to grow and that golly, he sure does feels upset that these people are yelling at him. Nevermind the fact that it's established that Farmer Ben is the only farmer in Bear Country and, due to the nature of these books and how these lessons are taught, a large portion of the schoolchildren only started smoking AFTER the only farmer within the area decided to start growing it.

And before you ask "well maybe they present the moral quandary of 'just because it's legal doesn't mean it's right' using Farmer Ben as a framework?", they don't. This is the last we see of Farmer Ben. Not once does anyone talk to Farmer Ben and ask him why he decided to grow a bunch of tobacco plants in the community. Cigarettes are purely terrible death sticks but Farmer Ben is a pillar to the community even though he's making the key ingredient.

Honestly Farmer Ben should count his blessings that no one torches his crops in the middle of the night. Why don't you ask one of the parents of the Too-Tall Gang kids how they feel about this, Farmer Ben.

Speaking of late night shady dealings, there is also a con artist bear named Ralph Ripoff (a regularly reoccurring character, and someone who would’ve been a tumblr sexyman if tumblr existed in the mid-80′s when the TV show was airing) who manages to convince several tobacco CEOs to start doing their business in Bear Country, probably on account of all those locally-grown tobacco plants that Farmer Ben helpfully planted and is within his legal right to plant.

The CEOs are named Mr. Wheeze, Mr. Tar, and Mr. McSnuff - because of course they are - and their cigarette mascot is named Moe Moose. Ralph Ripoff tells that, sure, selling cigarettes directly to children is illegal, but there's nothing illegal about making your mascot really cool and marketable to children.

As you can tell, this book is a direct commentary of the Joe Camel controversy of the 90's, and just when you think the book has reached Peak Wacky the moment it has a high school parade dedicated to this cigarette mascot complete with someone in a moose costume blowing smoke rings while wearing stilts...

...it goes the extra mile and Ralph Ripoff reveals a giant state-of-the-art billboard of a massive Moe Moose that can move its giant mechanical arm and smoke real smoke rings.

Don't worry, though. Ralph Ripoff doesn't get the same gentle treatment that Farmer Ben gets, for the Bear Scouts first lightly and legally protest smoking by making a bunch of anti-smoking buttons and flyers (uh huh, seems like something normal kids would do, I'm with you so far, book) and then they get one of the protesters from Farmer Ben's farm to hack and reprogram the robotic billboard so that the massive forty foot tall Moe Moose spells out "Smoking Kills" in front of a bunch of tobacco industry representatives and seemingly nearly asphyxiate Ralph Ripoff in a cloud of black smoke in the process. (WHAT)

Listen. I know Ralph Ripoff is named "Ralph Ripoff" but we can't apply the "what he was doing was technically legal" logic to Farmer Ben and then try to kill Mr. Ripoff for creating a dystopian robot billboard that somehow has the ability to spit out tobacco smoke. Ain't no rule says a dog can't play basketball.

Before they do this, they have to get one more dig at protestors by doing the whole “haha isn’t it wacky that this activist wants to chain herself to things”.

Bear Country has exactly one liberal living there, apparently.

There's also a scene where Brother Bear challenges the Too-Tall Gang to a foot race and the cigarette-addicted teens are so winded and out of shape from their destructive habits that they have to be put on oxygen tanks by some nurses that are standing by. You know, great stuff.

In short, I almost can't rate this. This book trips over its own messages a couple times, and honestly, the whole tobacco industry subplot just makes this whole thing feel like a fever dream, but damn it all, it is an exhilarating read as an adult.

And remember, if you want to stop tobacco from taking over your small community of bears, maybe don't wait until there's a giant robot billboard blowing smoke into the skyline before doing something about it.

Maybe listen to HER next time.

#Turq Reads A Book #Turq Reviews #The Berenstain Bear Scouts and the Sinister Smoke Ring #the berenstain bears

[nightfall-kachiniko]

Sometimes I feel like I’m two different people, living in the same body.

I have two sides that aren’t so categorized as I’d like, but it is best of fit.

I feel like a ghost trapped in a body, I’ve already passed on, my body just hasn’t.

It’s like being dead for a while, then resuscitated. But i haven’t been brought back to life for a while. There’s this part of me that has died from an unknown cause. I just don’t have a tombstone with my name on it.

My body isn’t buried 6 feet under the ground, deteriorated to become one again with the soil.

I find a sense of serenity with birth and death. You are brought up than broke back down. Once was nothing, left as nothing, but lived as something.

It’s fascinating and worrying, how any day I could leave and never return. I always ask myself what would I leave behind?

It’s now a daily question since the people who physically know me would remember a friend or a daughter, but me myself, i would remember a dead body that’s just now deteriorating.

Though my mind, split up into two parts, would remember not who i was physically, but who i was mentally. A head filled of another life, that’s where I truly lived.

In an imaginary world that only a young kid would have, that eventually came to be a life.

Dancing in a village instead of being in a class.

My lover caressing my cheek, even if it was truly my hand.

Fighting against evil as I imagined the screams from downstairs being ones of panicked civilians.

I saw the flowers and waterfalls outside the window to my bedside, even if it was night.

I didn’t run though, i just chose to change it. Even if it couldn’t fully change my place, i could change my position.

I found interest in fantasy because that actually had a story. My mind danced while my body laid in bed. My mind talked while my mouth didn’t speak. My body was just there, my mind somewhere else.

I lived too much in false that i often forget reality. Though it doesn’t mean i don’t live it. I accommodate with the circumstances I’m given, happy to receive any sort of excitement I get through the months. I still do my school work, talk to my grandparents, hang out with friends, have fun. I still live though just as two different people, stuck in one body. I’m not fully dead, my body’s still moving.

I don’t know what will happen in my life. I don’t know where I’ll go or who I’ll find. But i do know in the end , When a dead end becomes an entrance. When my body will be put into a box, my soul will escape it.

That’s who I’d remember when it comes to an end.

That was my mind. That was my life.

That’s who I’d remember I was.

[fatherramiro]

fuck it, when will mike flanagan actually cast jeremy davies in a project, i need jeremy to put his whole goddamn pussy into one of those monologues about death or horror or love or all three!!!!! i want him to be denied an emmy cause the emmys don’t care about horror!!!! i want to make this non-existent monologue of my dreams my goddamn ringtone/blog title/future engraving on my tombstone

[caleyodwyer]

from COLORFUL TOMBSTONES FOR DEAD IDEAS (2022) Oil paint on canvas 12 x 12 inches See: https://www.caleyodwyerart.com/colorful_tombstones There are five basic images in this series of ten paintings, but for some reason, I painted each one twice, so, with some variation there are ten pieces total. I like sculpture gardens and sculptures in fields, and I had the idea that it would be fun to make sculptures out of old ideas and beliefs, the age-old constructs that, to my thinking, plague cultures and individual lives. People make sculptures that represent ideas, but here I was more interested in imagining that we could literally transform ideas whose shelf lives have gone stale (or are otherwise harmful) into actual objects to enjoy. In this way, the old constructs would be captured and put to rest, but also replenished. As I painted these pieces, while I came to think of the objects they feature — the “sculptures” — as playful renovations, I also thought something darker: the sense that these objects mark the end point for notions by which people (myself included) have lived some (or much?) of their lives. Ideas organize but also curate our experience and what they leave out can be as dangerous or as helpful as what they leave in. Saying goodbye to old ideas--ways of seeing people and the world, etc.-- signals development and cause for celebration but also loss and grief. These paintings represent something underlying and constant in my experience: some felt relationship between sadness and delight. #contemporaryart #gallery #ideas #discourses #death #tombstones #grief #delight #joy #drawing #painting #prints #color #oilpainting #instapic #instapost #artcollection #artist #contemporaryartwork #losangeles #artcollector #artcollectors #interiors #interiordesign #caleyodwyer #caleyodwyerart #caleyodwyer_art (at Los Angeles, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/CpQzgnGvu3o/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#contemporaryart #gallery #ideas #discourses #death #tombstones #grief #delight #joy #drawing #painting #prints #color #oilpainting #instapic #instapost #artcollection #artist #contemporaryartwork #losangeles #artcollector #artcollectors #interiors #interiordesign #caleyodwyer #caleyodwyerart #caleyodwyer_art

[thegnmsolution]

Wyeth Memo - August 27, 1979 Single lots of vaccinations are spread out over a wide geographical area which prevents the doctors and public from connecting the cause of illness to a specific batch of vaccine

*Single lots of vaccinations are spread out over a wide geographical area which prevents the doctors and public from connecting the cause of illness to a specific batch of vaccine* *Wyeth Memo - August 27, 1979* "After the reporting of the SID cases in Tennessee, we discussed the merits of limiting distribution of a large number of vials from a single lot to a single state, county or city health department and obtained agreement from the senior management staff to proceed with such a plan." Wyeth Memo ------------------------------------------------------------------------ ...except there is an analogy here that goes way beyond the memo. Barbara Loe Fisher and Harris Coulter lay it all out in *"A Shot in the Dark," *subtitled "Why the P in the DPT vaccination may be hazardous to your child's health." Barbara is regularly portrayed in the media as an anti-vaccine zealot, but the book's discussion of what happened in Tennessee is pretty convincing. (And she was instrumental in getting a safer version of the vaccine onto the market.) From the book: "When statistics are applied to the study of vaccines, political immunology demonstrates its infinite flexibility: statistical evidence demonstrating cause and effect is denied, when this same evidence, applied to any other branch of medicine, would be accepted without question," Coulter and Fisher write. "This convenient method of reasoning was displayed with particular clarity in connection with the government's investigation of *SIDS deaths in Tennessee. In 1978-79*, eleven babies were found to have died within eight days of a DPT vaccination. Nine of the eleven had been vaccinated with the same lot of pertussis vaccine, Wyeth #64201 and five (four from the same lot) had died within twenty-four hours of vaccination. "A statistical analysis of the clustering of deaths revealed that the likelihood of observing four or more deaths occurring randomly on any of the first eight days after the use of lot #64201 was 3 in 100. ... E.B. Mortimer later reported that the probability of this being a chance association was even lower -- between 2 and 5 in 1,000. "The statistical evidence in favor of a connection between the deaths and the DPT shot was strong. Would the medical authorities bite the bullet and admit the vaccine was related to the deaths? Absolutely not." It's a long and unpleasant tale, but when all was said and done, "the tombstone was placed on what happened in Tennessee three years later, in the September 1982 issue of the Journal of Pediatrics, when Bernier and his colleagues at the CDC wrote their epitaph on the infant deaths. ... They ... made this amazing statement: 'Whether or not this temporal association reflects a causal relationship remains undetermined; we found no evidence to support such a causal association.'" Fisher and Coulter mention the Wyeth memo, saying the company "apparently also decided to act to prevent a clustering of deaths following DPT vaccination from a single lot from ever occurring again in a single geographical area." They don't reproduce the actual memo; as far as I know, this is the first time it has been published. (And no, neither Fisher nor Coulter was my source.) It packs quite a wallop, doesn't it? Since these are described as "Interim Measures In Affect" (sic!), and include a "Permanent Policy Proposal" to put into effect (sick!), wouldn't it be interesting to know how they distribute lots these days? Is this the kind of approach that Rosalynn Carter and Amanda Peet (I'll leave Paul Offit out of this) want to be hooked up with? Might they consider asking their benefactors for an explanation, since as far as I know none has been forthcoming although the memo's existence has been known for a couple of decades, at the least? Do the drug companies, the HMOs, the AAP and the CDC really have a track record of tracking down every report of side effects, encouraging the public to make use of the VAERS system and vigilantly monitoring the VSD database? Are they the ones we want to trust to tell us whether there is any "causal association" between vaccines and SIDS, or autism, or asthma, or ADD? I vote no. I also can't help pointing out that A Shot in the Dark was first published in 1985, just before the modern Age of Autism began. Too bad no one in a position to do anything about it took seriously the deep and disturbing implications of this incident -- and the continuing power of "political epidemiology" to bury its mistakes in unmarked graves.

Read the full article

[lenurrrrrrrrr]

i miss him so much. i want to process my grief but i dont know how. I’ve never had someone this close to me die and its fucking painful. i just saw him two months ago and he was alive and breathing and having fun. now all i can think about is how i was laughing and joking with my parents on the way back to college from thanksgiving break and the police were responding to his roommate finding him in his dorm. and i don’t know if he was in any pain but all i know is that he died of natural causes. 

all i want to do is sit and cry and scream but i cant because i cant fail my finals. and i cant even go to his fucking funeral because of final exams and the fact that its two hours away. thats going to fucking suck because it will finally sink in that hes not here and hes actually six feet underneath the fucking tombstone. 

and he died so fucking young. he had just turned eighteen in august and he was perfectly fucking healthy. he was active in so many of the clubs at his university and he had such a giant impact on everyone around him and that makes it hurt even worse. 

and i cant go on social media becasue every two posts he pops up and i cant say anything because people are just commemorating him. i cant stop seeing him and it keeps reminding me that he isnt a phone call away anymore. at the next drama production that our highschool puts on we wont see him and his drama dad sign. 

and i dont want to tell anyone about it because then it feels like im taking advantage of his death. i cant say i feel so sad that it feels like an elephant is squeezing my heart. and i cant say anything to my classmates because then they immediately say what are you doing here in class why are you here and I cant skip class because finals are just next week and i can’t afford to miss any of the material 

fuck it hurts so goddamn much and i miss him so much. he was so fucking young and it isnt fair that hes gone. 

#tw death #grief

[thorns-and-rosewings]

So after watching Spiderman: No Way Home, I had this idea...

So one of the major sticking points to me was WHEN all of the villains were conveniently plucked from their own universes and thrown into this crazy scenario? Pretty much when they were each just about to die (Except for Sandman)

My thought was this... What if this did not change anything that happened in their own worlds? What if the events that transpired didn't change their fates... They still died... Except when they are sent back, they are not in the same instance when they were ABOUT to die... They are sent back after time has passed to discover that they are in worlds that they DIED in...

(This is mostly an excuse to put Norman and Otto in the same universe.)

So Octavius returns and learns it's many years after his own death. Which, while disturbing as hell, does get him somewhat off the hook for the crimes he committed in the past, as long as he keeps a low profile.

The same with Norman Osborn, only he has far bigger issues...

Because in this world, Harry is dead...

Needless to say when Norman stands before his sons tombstone, has a complete mental collapse... again... And just for the sake of this scenario, let's say Harry was buried in the same cemetery that Rosie was and Otto just hears the most agonized screams he's ever heard, and finds Norman, the same Norman Osborn he had met in the other universe...

Well he can't just leave him there...

So Octavius takes this broken creature with him to the abandoned warehouse he has been living in and tries to just help him stay alive and get him to pull himself together mentally... And hope Normans breakdown doesn't trigger something that everyone hoped had been erased... Which could potentially just be dormant...

After maybe about a week, there's an unexpected visitor, in the form of their universes Spiderman.

Now obviously he hasn't died and there isn't two Spidermen, what the universe did as it abhors a paradox, is essentially merge the two. So while this Spiderman was taken from his universe recently, there was still a Spiderman living his normal life unaware of the Multiverse mess. And when they went back to their universes the two were essentially merged. So that Spiderman has the memories of what happened with Octavius and Norman... A stab wound manifesting... As well as the memories of what he did that week...

Makes a little sense... right? 😅

Let's also say that is what happened with Sandman too, he did lose his powers... But he can now go home and be with his daughter, who survived... (Because I like happy endings damn it)

So after hearing whispers about someone seeing the ghost of Doc Ock... Well he hazards a guess and goes looking. Actually finding them without much effort. Norman comes around enough mentally to be able to get the entire story of what happened to Harry and... Well, he doesn't mentally break again or blame Peter. He just blames himself for causing so much damage to his son's life and by extension everyone else's.

Otto interupts, pointing out that after everything that just happened... Norman has been given a second chance at life. The horrible things he's done cannot be undone, but he can give himself a different future in order to right some of those wrongs.

Norman is able to pull himself together after that. Enough that he remembers a few secret accounts he owns in this world and the millions of dollars he had stashed in them. Along with a private island with a lab on it that he also owns... Honestly he didn't buy that, he won it at a Scientists Convention at Vegas that got a little crazy...

... because it's Vegas and that's probably not the weirdest thing that has happened there...

Norman pretty much states that is where he is going... And he asks Otto to come with him. For all the kindness and help he has shown him and because there really isn't anywhere else for him to go. Let alone any kind of laboratory for him to work in.

...And Norman desprately doesn't want to be alone...

Octavius accepts. Partially because Norman is right and he doesn't have anywhere to go... and because he doesn't want to be alone either.

Peter is given an open invitation to come by if he ever needs something... Or if he just wants to visit.

...Flash Forward a few Months...

The island is equal parts lab and resort, something Tony Stark himself would be envious of. Norman and Otto pretty much spend their days doing Science, but also helping each other with their traumas or just being there when the other needs them. Probably being as close to therapy as either will ever get.

And yeah they are getting pretty close.

As for their projects, Otto is trying to replicate the Arc Reactor in this universe...

Which he didn't have one of the arms scan and record its basic structure and components, in order to study later...

And Norman has a few projects of his own but his are far less grand and he's is a bit hesitant to divulge a lot of details...

Might want to wait a bit before verbalizing you are thinking about cloning your dead son in order to have another chance at being a better father...

This plan WILL go awry...

But at least for the most part, they are alright in their world... Doing the best they can with the second chances they have been given.

(Yeah I just thought I'd randomly write this because it's entertaining and quite frankly I enjoyed it and I hoped others would as well. Maybe even help someone out with reasoning for how to get those two in the same timeline. I dunno, I actually feel like writing lately.)

#octogoblin #doctor octopus #Otto Octavius #Doc Ock #Norman Osborn #green goblin #Spiderman #spider man: no way home #Peter Parker #ottoborn #Multiverse #spiderman nwh #harry osborn #Spiderman AU

[princessofmarvel]

The Bond Of Trauma

Summary | You And Peter Bond Over The Trauma Of Losing Someone That You Love . (This Should Probably Be Read After The First One Shot That I Made For This Series / AU , Which You Can Find Here! ) .

Pairing | Tasm!PeterParker x Strange!Fem!Reader .

Genre | Fluff! With Some Angst .

Word Count | 1K+ (About 37 More Word's , Lol) .

Warning’s | Talking About Death , NO WAY HOME SPOILERS .

Author’s Note | Alright, I Have Always Had The Idea Of Bringing This Character In As The Readers Past Lover, So I Hope That Everyone Enjoys This! Again, I Have Severe OCD, So If There Are Any Weird Placing With Random Cap’s Where There Normally Wouldn’t Be , And I Am So Sorry! Lol .

It had been 24 Hours Since your first encounter with “Tombstone” and trying to figure out what universe this man had come from since he had not come from your’s, Or The Other Two Peter’s Universes.

“Hey, How Are We Not Sure That This…Thing Is Not From Your Universe?” Said The Peter Who Looks To Be The Oldest Of All Of Them.

“Because, I have never met him before, He is looking for spiderman, And My Spiderman Has Never fought him so what Does he want from me?” Said Your Peter Who Was Obviously Stressed Out, And Worried About This New Threat.

“Well, Did You Spit On His Sidewalk? You Know That Sidewalk Is Extremely Important To Him.” Said Ned To His Best Friend, Causing His Peter To Roll His Eyes, And Laugh A Little, Being Able To Relax Some.

“But, What If This Guy Makes Things Turn Out Like The Last Time? I Don’t Want To Have To Lose Everyone Again, I Can’t Lose Everyone Again.” Said Peter With MJ Coming Up To Him, And Hugging Him.  “Especially, You.” Peter Say’s Looking Up At MJ.

Seeing Them Being So Happy With Each Other, And Being In Love With Each Other, Made Your Heart Swell, You Were So Happy For Them, But It Was A Bit Triggering.

Needing To Get Out Of There, You Walked Off, And Made Your Up To The Roof.

“Uh, What’s Wrong With Her?” Asked Ned While Gesturing In Your Direction.

“She Lost Someone, That’s All That I Can Say.” Said Wong While Doing Some Research On The Man Threating All Of You, And The City.

“I-I’ll Go Check On Her, I Have Some Experience In That Area.” Said The Tallest And Slimmest Peter While Making His Way Up To The Roof To You.

Once He Got Up To The Roof He was met with the sight of you sitting on the edge of the roof, with your legs dangling off.

“Hey.” He says while coming and sitting next to you as if not to freak you out.

“Hey” You mumble back, while keeping your head down.

“I heard that you lost someone.” He says while looking at you A little bit. “I did too.”

“Really?” You Say While looking up at him finally while He nod’s A Little Bit. “I’m So Sorry.”

“She was my MJ, Her Name Was Gwen, She Fell, And I Couldn’t Save Her.” He said with tear’s welling up in his eyes.

Putting Your Hand On His Shoulder, And Him Placing His Hand Over Yours, You Decided To Finally Break The Silence.

“I Lost Who I Felt Would Be Like My MJ Too.” You Begin Before He Cuts You Off.

“You Don’t Have To Tell Me Anything.”  He Says With A Slight Smile On His Face.

“No, No, I Want To, It Would Be Nice To Get To Talk About Him, With Someone Else That Understands.” You Say While Looking At Him.

“Ok, Well Then, Please, Continue.” He Says Gesturing You To Continue With What You Were Saying.

“I Met Him When I Went With My Father On A Business Trip. They Needed A Doctor To Check In On These Siblings Who Had A Bad Reaction To Something That We Would Later Find Out Was Actually A Bad Reaction To An Experiment That Could Have Easily Killed Them.  I Spent A Lot Of Time With Them While They Were Recovering, At the time I Was About 15 When We Met, They Were About 6 Months Older Than I Am. He Was Always Just Really Cocky And Annoying, But Damn, Was He Cute.  They Had The Whole Operation Set Up As A Happy Family, Whose Children Had Just Happened To get Sick, So When I Asked My Father If I Could Go Spend The Summer With Them, Since They Were The Only Friends That I Had,  And Them Being Ok With Me Coming There For The Summer, Since I would Be a extra experiment, I went, And That Is How I Got my powers. We were only allowed to have Contact with the people there, so developing feelings was not really that difficult.  He pissed me off A Lot and annoyed me, constantly being like, “Oh, I know that you are in love with me.” And, “Why are you staring at me? Wondering What Is Underneath All Of This? Because If That is the case Sweetheart, All You Have To Do Is Ask, And I Will Happily Show You.” It pissed Me off so much that It made me Blush, Anyway’s I’m getting side tracked, They called my dad and faked me getting some sort of special scholarship to a basically Ivy league kind of high school, so that I Could stay there. I Was There For About A Year Before Everything Happened.  Even though I was being basically tortured every day, He always made it better.  Then One Day, We Got Into This Huge Fight, Because I Went Out To Help Them Fight When I Wasn’t Ready, And When I Asked Him Why He Cared So Much, He Just Shut Me Up And Kissed Me.  From then on we were inseparable.  His Sister Loved Us Together, Especially Since She Knew About Our Feelings For Eachother Long Before We Would Ever Admit It To Each Other.  One day something happened to where they were recruited by some weird thing to go To America, And Fight For Some Cause.  When He Kissed Me Goodbye, I Never Knew That, That Would Be The Last Time I Got To Kiss Him.  He Got Shot, And Killed Doing So, And Then I Never Got To See Him Again.”  You Gave Him The Long Version Of Everything, For some reason it felt like you could just share these kinds of things with him.

“Wow, I Am So Sorry Y/n.” He said coming closer to Wipe the Tear’s Falling Off of your face, He Expected You To Lean Away From Him, And You Did Too, But You Didn’t Instead, You Leaned Into Him, And Let Him.

“What was His Name?” He asked, You Realizing That You Never Actually Told Him His Name, Smiling A Little Bit, You Told Him.

“His Name Was Pietro Maximoff.”

#peter parker #peter parker fluff #andrew garfield #andrew garfield fluff #peter parker x reader #marvel #tasm #tasm peter parker x reader #tasm peter parker #mcu #marvel mcu #spiderman #spiderman fluff #spiderman x reader #spiderman homecoming #spiderman far from home #spiderman no way home #peter parker smut #tasm peter parker smut #andrew garfield smut

[xanthippe74]

Drarry Tag Game

Thank you for tagging me @caroll-in! 💖 I had to put in a "keep reading" cut cause I got a bit... wordy. (Please read it—this literally took me hours. 😣)

When did you get into Drarry and why?

The year was 2013 and I felt a ✨yearning✨ for some romantic stories. I must have come across a reference to fanfiction somewhere, because I started checking out a few different fandoms for books and shows I liked, starting with The X-Files. It didn't take long before I got to Harry Potter—a few Dramione fics first, then Drarry. And then it was all over for me, friends. OTP forever. Put it on my tombstone. (Just kidding. Don't do that.)

Which Drarry fic hooked you?

I can't remember exactly, but I believe it was either Eclipse by Mijan or Bond by AnnaFugazzi. I also read a lot of sara_holmes' fics early in my Drarry days, so it might have been Number Seven, which made a deep impression on me. (I just realized that I didn't have any of these in my AO3 bookmarks, so that's fixed now! 😅)

Top three favorite Drarry fics:

Oh, this is hard! I'll pick three that resonated deeply with me, emotionally:

Turn by Saras_Girl: The classic that needs no introduction. I put off reading this one for a while because I wasn't sold on older Drarry (37 years old! Positively ancient! 😂) or epilogue-compliant fics. But I needed more of this author after devouring her Foundations series, so I dove in. This is one of those stories that will never, ever leave me. (There's a light at the top of the stairs... You put me here, you left me here, and now I'm in love with him... Take the unknown road now... Maura and Boris and Frank and Misu... and 🔥ballroom sex🔥) Ugh, now I'm getting teary just thinking about it.

Wild (orphaned): This was one of the first fics I read that took place completely outside the canon settings, and I was utterly captivated by the shabby (but well-loved) house in rural Ireland. This author's writing is actual magic—so immersive that reading it feels like being teleported right into their stories. My most recent re-read was done in the middle of the night to distract myself from some bad anxiety. I felt a profound sense of gratitude to the author for getting me through that night (and for leaving the fic up on AO3 when they left fandom).

Little Deaths and How to Avoid Them by nerakrose: The asexual representation in this fic meant everything to me. I was so overwhelmed when I finished reading it that I couldn't even find the words for a comment. (Don't worry—when I commented on their next fic, I tacked on something about Little Deaths to the tune of BY THE WAY...😂) I adore Dustmouth's illustrations just as much as the story. The way they progress from grayscale images of Draco alone and facing away from the viewer, to vivid colors showing his happiness with Harry by the end? *chef's kiss*

Why can't you quit them?

God, their canon relationship and experiences provide such fertile ground for a million possible stories, characterizations, dynamics, and ways for them to fall in love. And I can't think of a single trope that couldn't be worked into a Drarry story in a convincing way.

Who breaks your heart more often?

Harry. I strongly head-canon him struggling with his mental health after the war and being overwhelmed by the anger and grief that he had to quash down in order to get through it all. I think he would also be much more profoundly affected by the Dursleys' treatment than canon portrays. The poor kid probably had to learn how any sort of positive relationship works... and how to ask for help without expecting to be punished... and how to show/accept physical affection. He probably didn't get a proper hug for 10 years! 😭

(Draco can break my heart, too, especially when his guilt and remorse slip into self-loathing. Also, give me all the down-and-out!Draco stories, please.)

Ideal career for Harry? For Draco?

I see Harry choosing a job where he can enjoy the tangible results of his work: a wand- or broom-maker, cursebreaker, or doing some kind of building/repair work. I can also see him as a dueling or flying instructor, since teaching those subjects would be satisfying without the all tedious parts of classroom instruction.

Draco gets a brainy career—something academic or requiring a lot of education. I think law and medicine are fields that would interest him because he could find redemption there by helping people.

Harry and Draco are being sent to a desert island for a week with plenty of food and water. Each is allowed to bring three additional items (no wands). What do they bring?

Harry: A Snitch, a broom, and the largest box of sweets he can buy.

Draco: A broom, one of those expanding magical tents with all the amenities inside (because Slytherin), and the longest book he can find.

Favorite non-Drarry HP character?

Luna, my angel.

If you had to pick one, enemies to lovers or (enemies to) friends to lovers?

See, sometimes you want the sexy fast burn of enemies-to-lovers, and sometimes you want the italicized OH moment of friends-to-lovers. Don't make me pick between them!

Would you rather read a fic that made you laugh or one that made you cry?

Cry, if I had to choose, but my favorite fics are the ones that move me to tears and have funny moments, too. Like Turn, which makes me weep when Harry returns from the glimpse, and then makes my cry-laugh a few scenes later when he tries to shrink the trousers he's wearing to make them more fashionable.

Three songs that scream Drarry to you (feel free to include the Drarry-est lyrics!):

Cold Little Heart by Michael Kiwanuka (see head canon above about Draco's remorse and feeling unworthy of Harry)

Maybe this time I can be strong But since I know who I am I'm probably wrong Maybe this time I can go far But thinking about where I've been Ain't helping me start

Roads by Portishead (postwar Drarry, still struggling with... everything and figuring out how to have a relationship/future together)

Oh, can't anybody see We've got a war to fight Never found our way Regardless of what they say How can it feel this wrong

Eight by Sleeping At Last (this song is SO Harry, it hurts. But there are also lines about being rejected/trusting that sound like things Draco would say to Harry)

I'm standing guard I'm falling apart And all I want is to trust you Show me how to lay my sword down For long enough to let you through

Favorite authors outside of fic?

Donna Tartt, Annie Proulx, Michael Chabon, Diana Wynn Jones, Jane Austen

#drarry #tag game