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neversleepagainau · 3 years

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please do not repost my art.

~~~

at long last, im so excited to announce that this ask blog is officially open! many people know I’ve been working on this intro for roughly five weeks, and I’m very excited to finally share it- possibly as excited as I am to FINALLY begin telling this story!!!

first of all, tumblr completely ruined the quality of that last panel- if you wanna see the full sized gif (warning you now, it’s enormous), you can find that here! And, if the gif is hard to read/hard to view, there’s a static version of this panel below the cut!

There’s also a ton of extra information that could answer some questions you might have, as well as a list of potential triggers to watch out for in the future! However, it is really long, and when I say really long, I mean it’s chapter-in-a-book-long so please don’t feel obligated to read it unless you have extra questions/have some bad triggers you wanna make sure to avoid.

Otherwise though, I can’t wait to see what kind of questions you guys send these two! One has to wonder… where in the world are they headed off to in the dead of night…

First of all, here’s the static image of Panel 8, as promised!

And now for some extra info on things going forward.

On every single canon update, there will be a description of themes in this story that could unsettle or discomfort some viewers. I’ve included tags to blacklist, and explained exactly how these situations might arise so folks who are sensitive to this kind of thing can prepare themselves accordingly!

I would recommend at least skimming this list if you know you have some bad triggers! This story will never get too dark or intense, as I’m attempting to stay true to the original spirit of MSA, but this doesn’t mean it won’t touch on those themes at all.

also, in regards to how much of this art is hand drawn by me- the honest truth is 99% of this is entirely freehanded. I took colors from the videos, but otherwise only used them as reference. However, if I ever used a canon asset to help me, I will always specifically say what exactly was borrowed directly from canon in a way that was more than just using images as reference and taking colors. for this post specifically, I’ll word it a little differently, but this will all be much tidier in the future.

the van asset is 97% freehanded by myself- I did take measurements of the canon asset, and marked my canvas so I’d know the width and height of the van, and vaguely marked where the tires would be.  I did trace the antennae ontop, as well as the cloud decals, one of the curves on the right side of the windshield, part of the door window at the very bottom lefthand corner, and the rear view mirror. The logo was not recreated, I directly took that and just altered the colors to fit the van. Other than that, everything you see on that van was freehanded. The van was also the only thing I used a canon asset to help me with for creation of it, meaning that the rest of the art in this introduction is entirely freehand.

moving on from that- updates will not take an entire month like this did. i will not be doing eight full color illustrations for every single update, and for right now, at the minimum, they’ll happen weekly! i can provide more information going forward once I work out how I’m going to go about things a little better, since things won’t be as huge as this introduction was. don’t worry though, the quality of the art itself will stay the same throughout the whole story!

and yes, lewis and vivi are in this too! there’s a big cast of characters, and lew and viv are just as much at the center of this story as arthur and mystery are- don’t worry, you’ll see them plenty soon enough!

finally, before we get to the content warning stuff, if you ever have any questions about how I’m running things, or need clarification on anything, please let me know! I’m happy to explain things in more depth if needed!!! and now, here’s the last chunk of this INCREDIBLY long introduction. ~~~ WHAT FOLLOWS IS A VERY LONG (!!!), IN DEPTH LIST OF THINGS VIEWERS MIGHT ENCOUNTER IN THIS STORY THAT COULD TRIGGER THEM. If you are not super sensitive or have very intense triggers, you don’t really need to read what follows unless you want to. Otherwise, I would at least skim this, so you know what tags to block so you won’t have to see this type of content.

Don’t let any of this worry you too much, by the way! This story is very likely not ever going to get extreme in any manner, I just like to be very cautious, just in case!

Also keep in mind that you can always ask me to add tags to a post, and it’s highly unlikely I will refuse said request. If I do, it will be for a very good reason, and I’ll explain it thoroughly, as well as remain open to any discussion about it. With that in mind, here are things to be aware of:

CHARACTER DEATH/REMOVAL FROM STORY: There may be characters in this story that you will get attached to that end up dying or not being in the story at all or as much as they were before. This story has chances for different outcomes depending on asks, but there are some things I have set in stone and a few of them involve these themes, so please be mindful of that. The tags to blacklist to avoid updates that touch on this specifically are #character death or #character removal.

DISTURBING CONTENT: This is vaguely worded because it is a bit of broad umbrella. There may be themes of body horror, gore, violent/upsetting/disturbing depictions of death (not any worse than Lew’s death, if it ever is I’ll be sure to specify ahead of time), creepy/unsettling designs and environments, so on and so forth. The tag to blacklist to avoid updates that include anything I consider to be disturbing to view is #disturbing content.

ANGST: This story will get sad, and broach on themes of abandonment, loss, trauma, depression, paranoia, self-hate, and things in this nature. What I can immediately promise is this story will NEVER have themes of suicide or self-harm. I do not feel this story needs to go there, nor do I wish to take it there. Also, while there is angst, I do not believe in beating characters up mercilessly- the angst is for the story and their development. This is not going to be a story that is only angsty. However, if any sort of angst upsets you, the tag to blacklist to avoid updates that include heavier, angstier themes is #angst.

PARANOIA: A few of the characters often get a sense of being hunted or followed, or something lurking around the corner, which can be upsetting to some viewers. A few characters may occasionally have moments where they express their anxieties in depth. The tag to blacklist to avoid updates that include heavy mentions of paranoia/depictions of it/make the characters (and potentially audience) feel paranoid is #paranoia.

UNREALITY: Lewis has some powers that can warp space and create illusions, and potentially will be in situations where he uses them in ways that could mess with people’s perception of reality. This can be very uncomfortable for some people to view, so in updates where this may happen, the tag to blacklist is #unreality.

SUGGESTIVE THEMES: This story will NEVER be explicitly NSFW, and will rarely ever feature these themes at all. It is mainly for the occasional joke here and there, but absolutely nothing more. However, if any implications of something slightly more adult make you uncomfortable, the tag to blacklist here is #suggestive themes.

ANIMAL HARM: Mystery may enter situations where he ends up getting hurt during this story, though he will never endure any kind of situations that mimic real life animal abuse. If seeing an animal be harmed in any way remotely upsets you, the tag here to blacklist is #animal harm.

~~~

If you made it all the way to the bottom, you’re a champ!!! While posts will definitely not be this long going forward, I really appreciate you taking the time to read this!

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onyour-right · 3 years

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Grief

Summary: A fic based on the aftermath of episode 3.

The last episode hit me with a lot of unexpected feelings and this is the product of it. RIP to Hank though. Comments are always welcome!

Word count: 1.6k

Kory waits up for him long after everyone has disappeared to their rooms for the evening; the air in the manor too raw and stifling in the devastation and grief to linger in it for too long.

Dawn had been inconsolable when her and Dick had eventually made their return, with her face that was tear-stained and blotchy, and had barely been able to utter a word in midst of her denial and sorrow – as if there were any words to truly express the magnitude of what it meant to unknowingly pull the trigger on a loved one – and Dick, he had only stayed long enough to see Dawn to her room, change out of his Nightwing suit and then leave the manor altogether.

As for Connor and Gar there had been a deathly silence that had struck them all immediately after. One filled with disbelief, as if it was a nightmare they would eventually wake from, and with guilt that if only they had been just that more quicker. Krypto, the treasured gift that they had never truly expected but appreciated all the same, had gone sniffing around each of them in turn, had nudged his body against theirs as means of offering comfort.

A key turning into the lock pulls Kory away from her melancholy, and she stays where she is in the armchair as she waits. Quick, light footsteps sound against the wooden panelled floor, and Kory can tell the exact moment Dick realises she’s in the lounge because his steps falter just outside the door and he shifts from one foot to the other like he’s unsure whether to stay or go.

“You’re still up?” he says from the door, his voice and expression a mixture of concern and tiredness.

The corners of Kory’s lips twitch softly and she glances up at him.

“I couldn’t sleep.”

His nod is full of understanding, and he must come to a silent decision because he enters the room and settles near her on the couch, a distance between them but one they could easily breach should they simply reach out. At first he says nothing and Kory is quite happy to leave him be, it allows her time to inspect him closely for any injuries in a way he might not allow if she were to ask. She thinks that he might realise what she’s doing anyway though, because by the time her green eyes reach his he is already focused on her, a curious intensity to his gaze that she can’t quite figure out.

She tilts her head to the side questioningly and slowly he averts his gaze.

“How are the others doing?”

It’s safe. Typically and frustratingly so.

Kory lets out a faint huff, licking at her lips.

“They’re devastated, Dick. That Hank died and it was Jason who had orchestrated it. Connor more so because he was so close to reaching him in time. Dawn has refused to come out of her room ever since she got back. I-” she breaks off, her eyes closing as she gathers her thoughts and runs a hand through her hair, she opens them again and lets out a heavy sigh. “I don’t know how we’re going to get through this.”

Dick shuts his eyes and scrubs a hand over his mouth, his body wound so tight his fingers tremble. It makes her think of the spot on his neck she knows will loosen him up if she were to press her lips against it, but then they haven’t known each other intimately like that in quite a while and she doesn’t want to overstep. There is a weight on his shoulders that the others will truly never understand or recognise, so many expectations and demands of him that she’s half surprised he hasn’t turned out another way, and the last thing she wants to do is pile on to that in any way.

“What are you feeling?” she asks instead, her voice gentle and coaxing.

He looks to her instantly and in that second of a moment he appears so vulnerable and unsure, she sees an echo of a younger him – the little boy, afraid and broken, when he lost his parents tragically, who sought proper care and guidance and got given violence and vengeance in return - it lasts no longer than a heartbeat, but that he should feel comfortable enough to let his guard down in her presence, even just for a moment, makes her heart ache in the best way.

Dick shakes his head with an exhale, a deep furrow set between his brows. Lost in his own disbelief.

“You should have seen him, Kory, there was no remorse. None. I mean I know he had his problems, but I never thought…”

He trails off at the end but she still hears what he hadn’t been able to say. She also doesn’t miss the fact that he hasn’t actually answered her question, but she won’t push him too much just yet; she understands him better than he realises, knows that pushing at him will only make him retreat or get defensive, besides now isn’t the time for it.

“Do you think he could be on something?”

At the questioning look that passes across Dick’s face she continues.

“He was dead and now he’s not, for all we know he could have been brought back by a procedure that has skewed up his judgement somehow, made him thirsty for chaos somehow.”

He’s sitting up straighter by the time she’s finished, his expression contemplative as he mulls over everything she’s just said, a bit more energised now that they might have struck out against something significant.

“Maybe it happened before he died and his death just exacerbated it.”

“Maybe,” Kory agrees. “But then what could be responsible for doing such a thing?”

“We’ll have to check in with Barbara, she’s the only one who might be able to get us access to his medical records. If we get those then we’ll be able to figure out.”

She nods, a surge of pleasure flowing through her at the way he had implied her involvement, at the idea of the two of them working together in a way that they haven’t for quite some time. As much as it delights her however there’s also a sting there at having to close a certain kind of door on the Jason they used to know. Or perhaps they never did, not really.

“It won’t in any way change what he’s done or make it forgivable, but maybe it will influence how we deal with him from now on.”

“I know,” Dick replies in a let out breath, and like she saw in Connor she sees the guilt in him now, except his is born of a completely different kind. His guilt from this will shape his decisions and thoughts through this moment in time and way after it too. It hurts now but he’ll be all the better for it.

She leans over then and takes his hand in hers, their palms brushing against each other as her thumb strokes the back of his hand lightly before pulling back. Or at least trying to. Dick refuses to let her go, instead interlacing their fingers and squeezing her hand with just the right amount of pressure.

It’s a feeling she wants to bubble wrap and keep safe so that in the moments where she’s at her weakest she can take it out and relive, can bask in this new level of intimacy that they’ve stumbled upon. For a long while its just the feel of his hand in hers, the sound of the fireplace crackling in the distance and the tick of the clock while minutes pass on by.

“I never asked how you’re feeling,” Dick says, watching her with a gaze that is penetrating, that is as comforting as it is exposing.

Kory hums gently in thought, feeling a lump in the back of her throat and tears pricking at her eyes when she tries to sum up what the loss of Hank means to her. She finds she can’t and gives a little shake of her head.

“I’m tired of losing people I care about.”

Dick squeezes her hand again, and it is an act of comfort just as much as it is one of agreement. His gaze is on their joined hands when he speaks, a frown on his face as the words fall from his lips like he’s startled by the sincerity, or that he’s still figuring out just exactly how he feels.

“I couldn’t do this without you, Kory.”

I don’t know what I’d do if it were you.

Her lips curve upwards into a smile at his words, and for as sad and angry and scared as she feels they are like balm to her wounds. Similar thoughts had entered her mind at several points of the day, but she had tried not to entertain them for too long, knew that if she had she wouldn’t have been able to remain as strong as she has, so that he should feel that way and be so open with it too…

She rests her head against her shoulder and watches him, tugging on his hand when he won’t meet her gaze so that he’ll look up and over at her. For as much as Kory knows she can’t make such a promise, that none of them are given to prophecy and have no idea how the twists and turns of their lives will go – especially with the irregular episodes she suffers from that she has no control over but knows deep down that they’re a forewarning of something more, she feels an urgency to offer him whatever reassurance she can. Perhaps though it’s for herself, so that she can say she gave herself fully to someone no matter the consequences.

“You have me, Dick Grayson.”

#dc titans #titans season 3 #dick grayson #koriand'r #dick x kory #dickkory #dickkory fic #it's been a minute #G writes #my fanfic

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ectonurites · 3 years

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can anybody please explain the appeal of tim drake because ive been into the batfamily for a while now and tbh im really confused on why people like his character so much compared to the other robins. like they all have their own thing going on and he just... doesnt?

Have you read his Robin solo? Because if not and you want to try to like him but just don’t understand why people do, that’s what I’d recommend. That and like, Young Justice 1998.

Because Tim definitely... does have his own thing going on. Maybe not in the same way as the others, but like, there’s a reason he has a 183 issue long solo comic that ran for like 16 years: he was fun to read about!

But I will give some more specific thoughts on the subject as a Tim Drake Appreciator™ (this got long im sorry)

The appeal of Tim (especially early on Tim) is kinda the fact that he’s this more normal kid. For a while that is his ‘thing’. He was basically designed to be a self-insert (he definitely became more than that along the way, but from the start he was meant to be relatable) in a different way than how Dick and Jason had been before him.

Like the role of Robin from the start was this way to create a character young readers could identify with more, could see themselves in more. And Dick and Jason did that, but they still had this element to their lives and stories that was more... unattainable for the average reader. Dick was a circus prodigy, Jason was either also a circus prodigy if we remember pre-crisis or if we go with his post-crisis story he’s this street-wise orphaned kid who had a really tough life but still went on to be a hero anyways. Obviously those lives are relatable for some people, but those’re definitely not as broadly recognized as common upbringings especially not by DC trying to market to the ‘average’ kid/young teen.

But the creation of Tim changed the game a bit. Dick and Jason were these aspirations a kid could look to like ‘wow I want to be cool like that!’ but Tim was a Robin designed for kids to look at and go ‘wow, his problems and civilian life are just like mine AND he’s a hero, I want to be cool like that!’, ya know? Tim was... just a clever kid with an average life who managed to connect some dots and had enough drive to want to fix things he saw were a problem, he didn’t have the same kind of heightened drama backstory the others did. The Robins that came after Tim definitely didn’t have this idea of relatability in mind the same way either. Unfortunately Steph’s time as Robin was much more of a marketing ploy than an actual like... decision to make her Robin, so it’s hard to really fit her into this conversation. But Damian from the start was first of all initially created not to be Robin but just as the son of Talia and Bruce back in the 80’s, but when he was later reimagined into the character that would become Robin he had the whole ‘raised by and is the heir to the league of assassins and is the son of batman’ thing going on still. He just was not supposed to be relatable that same way, he was a character designed with different things in mind.

I really think it was more just DC’s 90′s era younger-audience comics in general that tried to push that relatability thing (like in YJ how Cissie even after quitting the team stays a major character as a civilian throughout, and the civilian aspect that’s super present in Bart’s 90s solo too, etc), but later in the 2000’s that idea was definitely pushed to the side in favor of... putting in even more dramatic superhero-y stuff.

And the other thing that’s... such a more normal thing but it actually made him unique here, was that Tim’s dad was still alive until like 2004 (so 15 years into Tim being around as a character). This gave Tim a lot more typical ‘family school girlfriends normal life etc’ problems on top of/in contrast with his superhero problems. These just manifested in very different ways than they could with the other Robins because of that unique situation with a living civilian parent who doesn’t know about hero stuff (until he did find out which lead to that whole Unmasked thing, but there was only the brief time around War Games & Identity Crisis where Jack knew Tim was actively Robin and he was... still alive) Tim also had his life at school expanded way more than most other Robins, like, he had such an extended supporting cast of civilian friends which is a really interesting thing to read about (and the fact that he hasn’t had that stuff since the New 52 I think really hurts his character)

And then related to that loss of his dad... Personally another thing about Tim that really interests me is how a lot of things were more... his choice. if that makes sense. A lot of characters in the Batfamily were struck with tragedy/extreme trauma before they became heroes and that’s what spurred them into this life of becoming heroes. Tim’s situation wasn’t like that at all! When he first got involved in everything during Lonely Place of Dying, the only tragedy he’d experienced was watching Dick’s tragedy happen. Which sure yes traumatic obviously, but that’s not the same as how pretty much all the other Bats had gone through these very personal losses or other sorts of very first-hand personal traumas that served as motivators. Tim didn’t start to experience those things until after he got involved in the hero life, and aside from his Mom’s death which was more of just an unrelated incident (that technically happened before he was officially Robin but it was during his time training to become Robin), pretty much all these other tragedies and things... would not have happened or been experienced by him had he not become Robin.

That’s not me placing blame on him or anything like that, because god no that’s not how that works, but it’s very interesting because from his point of view he definitely feels that guilt because he knows him being Robin played a role in a lot of it (Thinking specifically about in Adventure Comics #3 when Kon even says “I know what guilt does to you” to him like it’s... it’s a thing with him!). His dad was murdered because he was Robin. He only met Steph and started dating her through being Robin, and thus he would not have experienced the loss of his girlfriend dying like that had he not been Robin. Tim met both Conner and Bart through being Robin, and would not have had a personal connection to them when they died otherwise. The whole Bruce’s death thing after Final Crisis, like. I could go on honestly, that was only talking about losses not even his own experiences nearly getting killed, but yeah, all these personal tragedies were experienced by him specifically because he chose to bring himself into this life, which I think in turn plays into how throughout his comics you see him go from having this really optimistic view on things and being really hopeful to seeing him at that low point he reaches by the time of Red Robin. (thinking about that one post that points out how Tim started out in the 90′s as an optimist and Steph a cynic and by the time they were Red Robin and Batgirl in 2009 they had switched outlooks...)

I also think that him having had such a great team book with the original Young Justice can help contribute to people liking him. His friendships with the rest of the core four and that team in general are really compelling. (and that’s something like again when looking at the other Robins, while Dick had the Titans ofc, Jason never really found footing with a team outside of like one mission with the Titans and then We All Know How Damian’s Teen Titans Stuff Went. Steph also only ever really worked with a team outside the batfam on very brief occasions) and even though I’m not as big of a fan of the 2003 Teen Titans run that came after YJ, people who read Young Justice and also that could follow and be attached to those same characters over a pretty decently long period of time.

Idk man, I don’t really have an ultimate point here i’m just rambling. I can definitely understand not seeing the appeal to him right away (honestly i’ve been into Batfam since like 2013/2014 and Tim did not become one of my faves until 2020) especially if like... idk when you say ‘into the batfamily’ that can mean a lot of different things. If you’re reading more like the bigger events with the batfam sure Tim can kinda fade into the bg a bit, if you’re more talking about fanon the fanon version of him is prettyyyyy uhhhhh not really the same as how he was in pre New 52 canon, if you’re mainly reading New 52 era Batfam stuff then that Tim I also don’t understand the appeal of bc thats Not My Boy, if you’re interested in a different member primarily and only familiar with Tim when he shows up in things focused on that other character then it’s easy to not really understand the appeal right away bc he’s more there to support that character rather than shine in his own right.

I think it’s also worth mentioning he’s just not everybody’s cup of tea, and that’s totally fine. Like, these are fictional characters and sometimes you just will vibe with a character and sometimes you won’t! idk if this helped at all or even made sense. but yeah. I just think he’s neat 😌

#Anonymous

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tundrainafrica · 3 years

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Note: Instead of posting a meta or a fic today, allow me to take a quick break from that because I think I really need to appreciate some people here and the fandom overall.

February 7, 2021.

Today, I turned 24 and my boyfriend surprised me with a gift I think I’ll be taking to heart for a very long time.

The story behind the gift was as precious (or even more precious) as the gift itself and I thought I’d share it since it turned out some content creators were involved in this gift and I very much want to express how much this gift has defined this day for me and will place my 24th birthday as one of those birthdays I don’t think I’ll ever forget.

Apparently, I had casually dropped both my tumblr and my ao3 account during one of our conversations and somewhere around November he had started looking through my bookmarks, my posts on tumblr and some of my interactions with people in the fandom.

I should have seen it coming. It had started with my boyfriend suddenly asking about my hyperfixation with Levihan.

Sav? Shipping? Sav? Binge reading ships and meta posts? Sav? Gushing about a fictional ship?

And I remember gushing about this with my seemingly uninterested boyfriend a long night after explaining what was oddly the most out of character thing for someone like me.

I was sharing with him my metas and hcs and maybe, I was dropping a few of my favorite quotes along the way and it turned out he was interested. Suddenly he was asking me about my favorite fics, my favorite scenes. Suddenly, he was rereading my favorite fics with me and a few times, he was quoting those same scenes. I did find out he was looking through my blog when I got a random message from a really sketchy tumblr telling me to open my facebook.

I suspected a few times that he could be planning something. December passed with nothing and eventually he stopped asking so I clocked that as a fevered dream or unnecessary assuming on my end and didn’t think too much of it after.

It turned out my boyfriend had messaged my favorite authors about their fics and he commissioned one of my favorite artists (if not my favorite) to draw a few photos and bound them into a Levihan Anthology

And it feels fucking amazing to receive something like this. To get Levihan which helped me through the worst of 2020, bound forever as a book I can just open up and read anytime. And I guess tearing up at receiving such a gift had me thinking of a lot of things at once (which were always at the back of mind) but I thought of sharing now.

The past year wasn’t easy. Actually. don’t think it’s an understatement to say this past year was dog shit. With the covid pandemic and all plans after that cancelled, I’m sure we can all agree we had our ups and downs.

I had a lot of my own plans completely thrown out the window for numerous reasons. I had plans of going to law school part time while building a career. And, I got a job right after college to make these plans come true. In September the law school I got accepted to (after working so damn hard the past year to get accepted) denied my appeal for night classes. I decided to drop my enrollment to focus on my career. A week later, my job laid me off.

And for once in my life, I wasn’t going anywhere. And I lived in a house where everyone was always doing something and as soon as I lost my job I was pressured to find another one. But as we all know, searching for a job during this pandemic isn’t easy. I was still reeling after having dropped my enrollment just to focus on my job only to lose that job the week after with no prior notice. Everyone around me was busy doing their own thing. I had no one to talk to and for a while, I was falling into this pit of depression.

My days consisted of me hiding under the covers of my bed in between the few interviews I would take day to day. Around that time, I decided to binge watch Attack on Titan as well

I was never one to get hyper fixated in ships. In fact, this was the first ship since Royai and Victuuri which I have been so passionate. And this is a whole new level of passion. I think this is the first time I’ve ever written so much in this small amount of time. It was slow going. Just like Levi and Hange’s relationship, my fixation with this ship was a slowburn.

Those days alone, I was reading fanfiction by the bundle, I was scrolling through the Levihan tag like a simp, leaving kudos in ao3 on a throwaway account and just scrolling through random people’s tumblr accounts.

What happened during the one month? And when I was alone, sad, lonely and stagnant with no one to talk to, when everyone around me was living their own lives, all I had alone in the bedroom was Levi and Hange’s stories to keep me company between interviews.

And the meta analyses and headcanons I had about their relationship were teaching me things. They were teaching me that life was never about how quickly you progress or how far you go. Maybe the real winners in life are the ones who can build good relationships, build relationships so mutually satisfying they keep each other growing and in those few moments reading, headcanoning ships, I did realize, maybe even as stagnant as I was at that moment, my life wasn’t dogshit.

No one’s life is dogshit for a few small bumps along the way. Sometimes it just is part of the process of growing, learning to get past the worse, learning to manage relationships. And maybe it’s these relationships which make life worth living. Maybe it’s these struggles depicted in these stories and the bounce back. Maybe it’s the love, the life, the emotions so carefully described and depicted in every single story which makes life, life.

With every single fic I read and every single fan art I scrolled through. Levihan was teaching my things about love, loss and life.

Sometimes, these fandoms are the things which can catch people before they fall too low into something. These works and stories authors and artists shared so generously were what pulled me out of this state and are what inspired me to explore this relationship for all the potential its worth and maybe share my own stories and headcanons which people may learn a thing or two from or maybe just find some comfort and hope in.

And these inspirations eventually evolved to writing. Writing 10,000 words in a day in between three interviews? I never was a writer but somehow, I found myself spending hours exploring the themes of love, loss and life with our favorite pairing

I didn’t start writing out of nowhere. I didn’t start making metas out of nowhere. I needed the right inspiration, the right content to get me into this point where I could continue writing, reading, meta-ing, appreciating, headcanoning and everything in between.

And I just wanted to express my gratefulness to every single person in the fandom who had made it possible for me to pull out of that blackhole. Fandoms are underrated and I believe there are so many lessons which can be learned from the right content and from the right people.

To the people who so willingly went along with my boyfriend’s little project:

@faerielleart I saved A LOT of your art and they’re sitting in my google photos under a folder called Levihan and maybe I did share a few of your photos (the cheeks one and the beast titan one and the les miserables) ones to my boyfriend unsolicited just to show him how beautiful Levihan can be. Thank you so much for these beautiful drawings.

@lizaloveslevihan You were one of the first people I talked with in this fandom and dreams really was one of those stories that fucked me up a little bit, had me make a few misses on the commute on the way home one day but maybe it did have me explore the angst genre a little more, maybe it did have me explore Levi’s character a little more.

@ariadneamare YELLOW. OH GOD. You know those letters? The ones which Hange left Levi at the end of the story? I ended up copying and pasting them and sending them to my boyfriend right after reading and I remember talking to him about this. We might be facing that same type of story in the future and I guess that ended up becoming a lot of foundation of our discussion and I guess, it’s just proof that there is so much to learn from fanfiction. There’s just so much to explore and fanfiction as a genre just does not get the credit it deserves.

@fanmoose12 I was exploring your works even before I started this tumblr up again. Maybe it was even your works which got me building my own headcanons from Levihan and writing from there. And I think I did leave a few anonymous messages telling you how I started exploring other genres because of your fics. Your works got my out of my dark place, it got me exploring a lot of other genres and for that I’m eternally grateful.

And somehow, my boyfriend picked that all up from late night discussions and one-on-one metas. Surprisingly, he wasn’t just playing along to humor his girlfriend. He was exploring the themes of love, life, loss and Levihan right along with me. (And got spoiled about Hange’s death along the way… Oops.)

And I am eternally grateful for that and I made sure to shower him with a lot of kisses after he kept me in the loop with what has been going on these past few months with his sudden interest in Levihan.

And this huge thank you goes out to all content creators (authors, artists, gif creators, shitposters alike). Sometimes you never know who’s thinking about your work, who’s shoehorning your works and quoting them to their best friends. Sometimes, you never will find out but your work had pulled someone out of a blackhole which they’ve been stuck in and sometimes you never know that your work has been that seemingly small thing that had taught them a lesson in love, life or relationships. Sometimes, that one work turned out to be an inspiration which got them writing and sharing their own stories or making their own drawings

And I guess, the point is, keep writing. Keep drawing. Keep sharing pouring your love, passion and emotions into works of art because you never really know whose heart you touched or whose life you changed.

I have a job now. I decided to push law school a few years back and maybe take the time to work on myself now and maybe spend the next months or maybe years writing metas and fanfictions. I was pulled out of my hole. I was inspired. I have my own stories to tell and I don’t think I would have been here if I hadn’t spent the last few months reading fic after fic, meta after meta, appreciating art after art,

So anyway, I just wanted to share some pics of my favortie fics, immortalized in one anthology, all organized by my boyfriend. And I think he made some great decisions with these.

(Bookbinding credits to @mayerwien)

#levihan #levi x hange #levi x hanji #lyf #life post

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balillee · 3 years

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The Implications of Dream’s Vault - Who is Dream Threatened by and Why?

/rp

On the stream on the 20th, we were finally given confirmation that Dream does, in fact, have a house. Sort of. I mean, if you consider that thing to be a house more than it is a trophy room, then sure, he had a sleepover.

But, now that the boogeyman’s in the clink, let’s talk shit.

There were various spaces in the museum for items of sentimental and functional significance that specifically relate to ten different characters. I listed them all in a post before for reference, but in brief, those ten characters were inclusive of Tommy, Tubbo, Techno, Ghostbur, Ranboo, Purpled, Punz, Sapnap, BBH and Sam. There were spaces in the vault for their pets, their personal belongings, and even for Skeppy - as dark as that is. I’ll go over why he needed those items specifically to hold power over this exact group of ten people.

Now, I’ll admit that it’s unlikely that these are the only ten people that can seriously do damage to Dream’s authority. However, I believe that these ten were represented specifically because they’re the most immediately threatening, either that or they’re the only ones that Dream’s ego allows him to see as a threat, or as a tool.

- Tommy- Tommy is kind of obvious. In the vault, there was a shrine to the discs, a pen for Henry and there was a spot for a piece of bedrock (it’s unclear whether or not the bedrock was for Tommy or for Techno, as they both had a piece. Or Drista, but she’s a deity, so who knows.) Tommy is the only thing that Dream is attached to, and it’s painfully obvious, hence why Tommy was able to use his own death as leverage to take Dream down. If Dream can keep things as significant to Tommy such as Henry and the discs away from him, he can eternally perpetuate their game of cat and mouse. Dream was a villain that Tommy became the catalyst for, and it’s why Dream appreciates him so much. He won’t kill Tommy, but he’ll teeter him over the edge by dangling things above his head for fun.

- Tubbo- Tubbo is also kind of obvious. In the vault, there was a post designed for Squeeks, Tubbo’s pet fox. It was made plainly clear that Dream places no value in Tubbo, but Tubbo does have some influence that he needs to take into account. Especially before Doomsday, Tubbo had systemic power and he had the final call on all things in relation to L’Manberg, and he had a large part in the actions of the Butcher Army. That, and if Tubbo was threatened with the loss of Squeeks, Dream, who views Tommy as some valiant knight, will swoop in to help him. Tubbo might not be fun to Dream, but he’s a tool to get to Tommy, and he was the final say in L’Manberg.

- Techno- There are multiple reasons to want Techno under your thumb. In the vault, there was a spot for the axe of peace, a pen for Carl, and a spot for either Techno or Tommy’s piece of bedrock. Techno, despite what he’ll have you believe, holds a lot of systemic power. He backs people into a corner with his threats, which he’ll go through with in a heartbeat, and he’s forced people to accept his warped anarchist ideology multiple times through fear-tactics. That, and, alone, he still holds a lot of power anyway. He’s by far the best combatant on the server, he is stacked to hell, has stacks of wither skulls, and could probably level the entire server. If Techno ever didn’t agree to Dream’s plans, not only could he wave the favour around for him, but he could also threaten Carl and keep his axe of peace from him.

- Ghostbur- This one’s an odd one, I’ll admit, but there are a couple of reasons why Ghostbur could have been a threat. In the vault, there was a spot for friend (whether or not the friend that was in the vault was the real one is unclear, as another version of friend was still present in the button room.) Everybody loves Ghostbur, it’s obvious. He’s Caspar the Friendly Ghost, with his aptly-named friendly blue sheep! He takes away your sadness with his blue, and he’ll keep you company. And that’s Dream’s issue. We already know that Dream tried to kill Ghostbur around the time of the Beach Party when he was told to go wander in the snow. So why? If Ghostbur was threatened, people would be pissed. Let’s say that Dream frames Techno for killing friend, or kidnapping him, or whatever. Ghostbur would be incredibly unhappy - he’d forget it, but others wouldn’t. People would go after Techno, and there’d be full-scale conflicts because of a ditsy ghost and his sheep. By creating conflicts, Dream can whittle down the crowd a little, and he can watch people grow weak. That’s where Dream comes in and asserts his power.

- Ranboo- Ranboo, while a little more obvious than others, is definitely an interesting addition to the list. In the vault, there was a space for Ranboo’s cat, enderchest. Why Dream chose enderchest specifically, when Ranboo probably has the most pets out of anyone on the server (most of which are just kinda named after him), I don’t really know. I only started watching his streams kind of recently, so I don’t know if enderchest was his first pet, or if that was Jonald. I’d have to check. Dream has very obviously been manipulating Ranboo for a short while now. I mean, ever since he and Tommy burnt down George’s house, he probably figured that Ranboo’s good for something. Dream exiled Tommy in retaliation because he took the first possible chance to punish Tommy to such an extreme extent, and he had other plans for Ranboo (because there was no way he couldn’t have known that Ranboo was involved.) But knowing that Ranboo has chronic memory loss? Even better. It ensures that even Ranboo doesn’t remember, and when the truth comes to light about him having betrayed everyone, he’ll be completely isolated, and that’s when Ranboo folds. If Ranboo suddenly is able to remember, however, Dream can still keep Ranboo under his thumb if he has enderchest. If enderchest gets threatened, Ranboo, again, will fold, especially since he’s very susceptible to peer pressure. But lets say that Ranboo was never controlled by Dream, and that Ranboo was just trying to fill in the gaps. Let’s say that TruthBoo was just a manifestation of catastrophisation. Well, he still knows what Ranboo’s capable of. He’s a pretty good fighter, probably one of the better ones on the server I’d imagine, and he’s stacked. Dream could likely do with a combative powerhouse like Ranboo, especially one with as many connections as him.

- Purpled- This one is definitely the wildcard of the bunch, but there is a definite reason why Dream would have need of someone like Purpled. In the vault, there was a space for DogChamp, Purpled’s pet dog. Purpled, if you’ve been paying attention, doesn’t really get into conflict, and he’s a definite neutral faction to the point that he’s barely around. But, it’s not like he won’t show up ever. If he wants to hang around, he will. Purpled’s a decent combatant, and it’s likely that Dream could have used DogChamp to get him on his side if ever there was a conflict - plus, even if Purpled was weaker than others in terms of items, it’s not like Dream couldn’t gear him up, either.

- Punz- I mentioned this before in a separate post about the double-agent Punz theory, but Dream specifically didn’t have a spot for Bumpkin - something the two of them planned to fight over - he had a spot in the vault for Punz’ shulker box. So not only can Punz be swayed with money, Punz can also be swayed by one of the most powerful items on the server - not only is the shulker box a one of a kind, it’s also something personal to Punz, and it likely holds items of functional worth too. Punz decides where he stands based on what he can get out of it, and by taking the Punzo Shulker, Punz can get something back if he works with Dream.

- Sapnap- Sapnap is Dream’s friend, and usually sided with him during conflict because of their continued friendship. So why were there spots for Beckerson and Mars, Sapnap’s fish? Sapnap is more of a rogue than George is, in my opinion. Sapnap has sided against Dream before, literally in the server’s very first war, so while Sapnap values their friendship he’s not opposed to fighting Dream. Dream nearly revealed to Sapnap during the Spirit speech that he didn’t care about him, and it was the start of where Sapnap started to doubt his relation to Dream. Sapnap’s not an active player in the story, but by god is he a powerful one. If Sapnap is on Dream’s side, then Dream’s got his lackey, and he’s still got respect and power. And if Sapnap doesn’t agree, well what happens to Beckerson? If Sapnap knew that Dream was dangling Beckerson above his head the whole time, he’d have opposed him from the start, but he’d be completely trapped. Sapnap now fully sides with people like Tommy who, instead of taking from him and using him, will reconcile and work together instead. It was a harsh truth for Sapnap to face, but a necessary one. Sapnap’s not tied to Dream anymore.

- BBH- BBH is also an interesting one, and this one’s definitely the darkest. In the vault there was a two-by-one cell designed for Skeppy, BBH’s best friend. Not only would BBH do anything for Skeppy, their life forces are canonically tied together. BBH is effectively immortal, and only loses a life when Skeppy does. If Dream has Skeppy, then he’s more than able to whittle away BBH with ease and eliminate him entirely if he doesn’t do his bidding. Kind of like a three strikes and you’re out system. Not only that, but BBH is definitely one of the most powerful players on the server. He’s the leader of the Badlands, the server’s most powerful militia. They have the combative and systemic power, they have the ambition, they have the people, and they have the land. If Dream controls BBH, Dream controls the Badlands.

- Sam- There was a space in the vault for Fran, Sam’s dog, and there’s a very, very good reason for this. Sam is the self-proclaimed most stacked man on the server, he’s the head authority on the prison, he has ties to the Dream SMP and Snowchester, he’s a member of the Badlands, he’s cracked at the craft and he’s a technological genius. Sam once almost waged a war because Ponk killed a fake Fran, that’s how much he cares. If Dream controls Sam, Dream has full freedom to put anyone he wants in the prison if they dare threaten his authority. He could even put Sam in there, if he felt that Sam was too much of a threat. Sam’s probably one of the most important people on this list simply because of the influence and power that he has alone, and he’s not even the leader of anything.

So there we go - here’s the proof you need that Dream is a fucking nutcase.

#dream smp #dsmp #dream smp canon #dream smp lore #dream smp theory #dsmp canon #dsmp lore #dsmp theory #dsmp prison #dream smp prison #dsmp finale #dream smp finale #dsmp spoilers #dream smp spoilers

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iliveiloveiwrite · 4 years

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Matchmakers

Request: Heey, could I maybe request a professor remus x professor reader where maybe he saves her from something? Maybe she's walking on the grounds and something goes to attack her or a student casts a rouge spell in the corridor? I really love your work btw!

A/N: I loved this request! I can only hope I’ve done it justice. I didn't know if you wanted a romantic relationship so I’ve brought one in but if you don't like it, I don't mind writing another for you! I also feel like the reader could be a bit harsh in this but the teacher within me came out! Sorry!

Pairing: Remus Lupin x Fem!Reader

Warnings: none really

Word count: 3.1k

Your history with Remus Lupin spanned years having become friends in your Second Year of Hogwarts. You had also known James, Sirius and Peter – it still hurt to think of what had been lost. Of the four Marauders, you were closest with Remus. You had connected over a shared love of books and chocolate and from there, a close and dear friendship had blossomed.

A year after your graduation you had applied for a teaching position within Hogwarts; Dumbledore remembered you fondly and the interview had been a success. You were quickly offered the job which you happily accepted.

Time swiftly passed in the corridors of the school for witchcraft and wizardry; meeting new students, saying goodbye to old. You were not ashamed to admit that you teared up a little the moment you saw Harry Potter walk into the Great Hall; the spitting image of James with Lily’s eyes. When he was sorted into Gryffindor, you knew that James and Lily were watching their son from wherever their souls had gone to.

Hogwarts was in need of a new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, and they were in need desperately. You also knew of a man who had need of employment; Remus Lupin struggled after the deaths of James and Lily and the events that followed. However, he struggled more getting paid employment due to the discrimination laws against Werewolves. Putting two and two together, you suggested to Dumbledore of appointed Remus as the new DADA Professor. Dumbledore took your suggestion seriously, and a letter arrived a week later from Remus himself, saying that he would see you in September.

His arrival was bittersweet; the closeness between the two of you had faded somewhat despite the common letters exchanged passed between the both of you, but the sight of him helped to heal an old wound within you. Time had passed so fast since the death of James and Lily and the loss of Sirius and Peter. Almost overnight, it had been you and Remus left; people would remember James, Lily, Sirius, and Peter but not quite like how you and Remus would. His arrival at Hogwarts brought old memories back to the surfaces; ones he was more than happy to talk about on an evening. The closeness you had both experienced through your education at Hogwarts was soon rekindled.

A routine rapidly developed between you and Remus; on a morning, he would wait for you by the door to your living quarters so you both could head to breakfast together. On an evening, you saved a seat for him at the teacher’s table. It was inevitable that the students would notice and start to question the closeness. It never seemed to bother Remus; even when you raised the subject to him one evening, he simply shrugged and said that teenagers will be teenagers and they will gossip about anything.

It is on a Friday morning that Harry, Hermione and Ron witness Remus’ and yours routine up close. They’re sitting on one of the many benches before their first lesson of the day. As you and Remus walk past, they all wish you a good morning. You wish them one back before returning your attention to Remus.

“I’ll see you at lunch.” You say.

Remus nods, smiling down at you. You blush at the look on his face, he had this way of making you feel as if you were the only one there. The two of your parted ways to head to your classrooms, a quick brush of your fingers against his as a goodbye for now.

Harry, Hermione and Ron were now invested in what they were seeing. They had never thought of their teachers to have a personal life; they simply thought that they lived and worked in the castle and that was that. Now that they saw this, they couldn’t help but be intrigued.

“I never realised just how close Professor Lupin and Professor (Y/L/N) were.” Harry states.

Hermione hits Harry on the shoulder, “Don’t be so clueless! They totally fancy each other! It’s obvious.”

Harry rubs at his shoulder, glaring at Hermione, “How?”

Hermione shakes her head at him, “Look at them. Her touches lingered longer than they should have and look at how he smiled at her. It was like she was the only one there.”

Ron frowns, “How have you seen all of this?”

Hermione sighs, “Honestly. You’re both so clueless. I’m telling you know, they’re both in love with each other. I doubt they’ve told one another either. Oh! It’s so exciting!”

Ron looks at Hermione as if she’s grown another head. She grins widely at both the boys, “We have to get them together!”

Ron shakes his head, “No, nope. I do not want to get involved in a romantic plot between teachers. Not my thing.”

Harry nods his head, agreeing with everything Ron says. Hermione frowns at both of them, “We could be helping out our two favourite professors!”

Ron looks at Harry, “She isn’t going to drop this until we agree.”

Harry nods, “I know.”

Ron sighs, “Okay, we’ll do this, but that’s it. No more teacher romance, it’s gross.”

Luckily for Ron, Hermione explains that the plan could be put into action fairly fast. They had your class before break – the perfect opportunity, Hermione illuminates, plenty of time before their next lesson to ask you some questions.

Harry, Hermione and Ron corner you after their lesson the same day, “How do you know Professor Lupin so well?”

“I was at school with him,” You turned your eyes to Harry, “I was friends with him and your father, Harry. I knew both of your parents.”

It was almost immediate, the change in Harry. “You were?”

You smiled sadly, “I was. James used to make sure that I ate when it came to exams because he knew that I would spend more time in the library instead of eating or sleeping.”

Hermione interjected, “So you knew Sirius Black as well?”

You frowned at the mention of the Marauder you thought you had known, “I did. Or at least, I thought I did. Anyway, what does this have to do with anything?”

“We’ve seen you and Professor Lupin together. We thought there was more to your relationship.”

“We are friends, nothing more. I don’t see how that is an appropriate topic for students.”

The trio had the decency to blush at this. Ron, however, gained his confidence back quicker than both Harry and Hermione, “We aren’t blind, Professor. Both you and Lupin have a thing for each other. It’s sickening actually, it’s put me off my breakfast more than once.”

You frown at the Weasley, “Thank you for your assessment, Ronald. I can assure there is nothing between me and Professor Lupin other than a long friendship.”

“But you wish there was.” Harry states.

“Again, I don’t think this is an appropriate topic. And look, it’s time for next period, off you go you three and please try to stay out of other teacher’s personal lives.”

“It’s okay Professor, we won’t tell Professor Lupin you like him.” Ron promises as he leaves your classroom.

You shake your head in disbelief as the trio leave. You never realised that your feelings for Remus were obvious; so obvious that even the students had picked up on them. You and Remus had quickly confessed to the other than you harboured romantic feelings for the other. Your relationship came naturally after that; the both of you agreeing to keep your relationship a secret from the students, but not the teachers.

You shake your head again, heading to your living quarters. There was a pile of exam papers that needed to be marked which seemed to be getting bigger and bigger by the day. All teachers are Hogwarts dreaded exam time just as much as the students; despite being the one to set the questions, it never made marking any easier.

Opening the door to your living quarters, it was a nice surprise to see Remus already there sitting on the couch, marking Fourth Year homework. You press a kiss to his head before heading to the kitchen to make yourself a coffee knowing that the caffeine would be needed to get through the next few hours of marking.

“Kettle’s just boiled, my love.” Remus shouts to you.

You bite your lip at the use of the pet name. You were certain it was your favourite despite the myriad of others he used. “Thank you, darling. Do you want a drink?”

“I’d love a tea.”

“One tea coming up!”

Heading back to the couch, a drink in each hand, you hand Remus his before taking a sip of yours. You sigh happily and lean back into the couch; Remus places a hand on your thigh and rubs comforting circles there.

“What are your plans for the rest of the day?” You ask, the clock had barely struck eleven, but you had finished with your lessons for today. You appreciated it when days were light with teaching, so you get ahead on any organisation – or have a nap, which is exactly what you wanted to do.

“I’m teaching last period, but free until then. I wanted to get ahead on some marking, you don’t mind that I came up here, do you?”

You lean forward to press a chaste kiss to his lips, “I don’t mind at all.”

He pulls you in for another kiss, and another kiss, and another kiss. You start to see where this is going, and pull away completely, “Remus, we have so much marking to do.”

He sighs, “I know. What are your plans for the rest of the day?”

You point to the large pile of exam papers, “I’m marking those and then I’m going to sleep.”

Remus hums, “I like the sound of that. Other than the last bit, can I ask a favour, darling?”

“Of course.”

“Would you help me in my last lesson today. It’s Third Year, dark creature.”

You nod, “Sure, I’ll help you.”

You start to chuckle as you think back to the conversation you had earlier with Harry, Hermione and Ron.

“What’s so funny?” Remus asks, smiling already.

“Some of the students are on to us.”

Remus arches an eyebrow, “Oh yeah?”

You nod, “I was approached by Harry, Hermione and Ron not even half an hour ago asking whether I had feelings for you.”

Remus laughs. That sound has quickly become your favourite in the months of your relationship. “I bet that was an interesting conversation.”

“It was. I can’t get over just how much he looks like James and Lily, Remus.”

Remus’ hand returns to your thigh, rubbing gently, “I know exactly what you mean. He’s a perfect combination of the both of them.”

The rest of the time before Remus’ lesson was spent working through the pile of exam papers. OWLs were a marker for students for which subjects to take to NEWTs – from the looks of it, you could have pretty full classes from Sixth Year with the amount of effort placed into the exam papers.

Remus rubs his eyes around ten minutes before the start of his lesson. The aftermath of the full moon two weeks before was still affecting him, but you knew he was working through it and you would help in any way you could.

Standing, you grab Remus’ hand and pull him up. Pressing a kiss to his cheek, you utter, “Let’s go see you in action, Professor Lupin.”

He grins widely, he adores his job. He adores it because he loves teaching, but also because it brought him to you.

Entering the classroom, you can’t help but notice Hermione whisper to Harry about your presence in the classroom.

“Afternoon class. I know last lesson of the day, but let’s power through shall we?” Remus claps his hands together, calling attention from the class, “Today’s lesson will focus on Red Caps; our lesson today will focus solely on the description of the Red Cap

“Sir?” Hermione’s hand in the air.

“Yes, Miss Granger?”

“Why is Professor (Y/L/N) here if we are simply describing features and threats of a Red Cap?”

“Red Caps are nasty creatures. They are known only to dwell where blood has been spilt and will lure Muggles to their death before dipping their cap in their blood hence the name Red Cap. I’ve invited Professor (Y/L/N) as a precaution.”

Hermione seems satisfied with the answer because they are no follow up questions. Remus throws a smile in your direction before heading into the back room to grab the Red Cap. He returns a moment later with a Red Cap in a cage.

“As distressing as it looks, the Red Cap will be released into the Forbidden Forest after this lesson. He won’t come into any harm here. Any questions on your tasks for today? None? Okay, feel free to come to the front and take some notes on the physicality of the Red Cap before consulting pages 66-70 of your textbook on the threats a Red Cap can pose to Muggles and Wizards.”

The class seem hesitant to move. You shift so you stand on the other side of the Red Cap.

“Both professors are here, you are safe to come up and look.” Remus reassures.

Harry stands first, bringing his notebook and quill with him. Slowly, the class start to follow. They’re quickly engaged with the task, conversations happening about what they can see.

You and Remus take a step back, keeping an eye on the class at all times. Hermione nudges Ron as she notices the closeness between the two of you; Ron rolls his eyes at her before asking Harry what he’s written so far.

Hermione pulls Harry and Ron to one side, whispering an idea to them. Neither of the boys looked entirely convinced, but they soon start to nod as Hermione continues to explain her plan.

They join the rest of the class. Hermione edges towards the caged Red Cap; it fixes her with a look and for a moment, she doesn’t want to go through with her plan. She discreetly pulls her wand from her robes and whispers the unlocking charm. The locks on the cage and on the Red Cap’s feet unlock – a testament to her power.

You and Remus realise what she has done too late. The Red Cap bursts free from its cage and all hell breaks loose. Students start running for the door. Remus shouts for calm, some students listen but remain close to the door in case of the need for a quick exit.

You try to wrangle the Red Cap back into its cage; an idea it does not appreciate because it quickly leaps for you, not giving you any chance to defend yourself magically. Hysteria starts up again at the sight of a Professor fighting with a Red Cap.

“Petrificus Totalus!” Remus shouts.

The Red Cap above you freezes entirely; petrified from Remus’ spell. Remus turns to the class, “After all of that, I think class can be dismissed. Grab your things, students. Harry, Hermione, Ron, please wait a moment.”

The colour drains from the faces of the trio. They didn’t expect for it to go this bad; they didn’t think it would try to hurt you seriously. All they wanted was for Remus to save the creature and you would hopefully confess your feelings for him since you had seen him in a saviour’s light. All three dreaded what was to come next.

Wiping your clothes down, you try to keep your temper in check. You can hear Remus dismissing the rest of the class other than Harry, Hermione and Ron. All three look as if they would rather be anywhere than here.

Remus comes straight to you the minute the final student has left the classroom, “Are you okay?”

You nod, not entirely trusting your voice. He turns towards the trio.

“Who thought of this idea?” Remus asks, calmly.

“We had to take matters into our own hands, you both were so clueless!” Ron cries.

“We got tired of waiting for you both to confess.” Hermione says.

“Confess what?” Remus asks.

“Your feelings for each other!” Ron shouts, “It is so obvious; the whole school already thinks you’re in a relationship.”

Remus looks shocked at the outburst.

“None of this was acceptable behaviour. I hope you are all aware of this. I will be taking 30 points from Gryffindor because of this and you will have an hour’s detention with me every evening next week so make sure your diaries are free.” You state.

“We’re sorry, we didn’t realise that things would get so out of hand.” Harry apologises.

Remus sighs, “Your intentions were good, but your actions were dangerous.”

“We know.” All three say.

“We are really sorry, Professors.” Hermione whispers.

“That’s all for now, head back to the dormitory. Go straight there, no detours please.” You say, dismissing the three students. They grab their belongings quickly, leaving the classroom just as fast.

You sit down at one of the desks, putting your head into your hands. Remus perches on the edge of the desk, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder.

“I can’t believe they did that just for us to confess.” He whispers.

You groan into your hands, “They’re exactly like we were when we were here.”

Remus laughs, “I think they could be worse.”

You pull your hands away from your face, “James and Lily would be so proud of Harry.”

Remus’ hands rubs your shoulder, “They really would.”

You place your hand over his, “I miss them, Remus.”

“I do too.”

“I feel awful for being so harsh, but what they did was not acceptable.”

“All for us to confess.” He says, his hand squeezing your shoulder reassuringly.

“I wonder what they’ll do when they realise that we’ve been in a relationship for three months now.”

Remus laughs, loud and long. He claps his hands together, “That will be a sight to see.”

“Should we tell them?”

A glimmer of mischief lights up in Remus’ eyes, he was one of the original Marauders; the famous mischief makers of Hogwarts. “No, let’s not.”

You chuckle, standing up. Remus pulls you to stand between his legs he places a finger under your chin before he kisses you.

Harry definitely inherited his mischievous streak from his father, but what Hogwarts never truly knew that behind the majority of the pranks played by the Marauders, it was Remus who had planned and instigated them.

You wrap your arms around his neck, whispering to his mouth, “Thank you for saving me.”

“Always, my dear.”

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i-will-physically-fight-you · 4 years

Text

Fragmentation Fanfic

Title: Fragmentation

Summary: Once Upon a Time, a Bold-and-Boisterous Prince sits on a throne. A Bold-and-Boisterous Prince has a great fall. A Hallowed Heart finds him in pieces and a Studious Scholar puts the Prince back together again. Or.

A broken crown lies in an empty throne room. A Shrewd Snake and a Shy Spiderling enter the throne room. Only there isn’t just a broken crown awaiting them, there’s a broken boy. All the words and all the actions can’t put the boy back together again, but a listening ear and a comforting embrace softens the pain. Or.

If a mirror shatters into two pieces, which one is the original piece?

Word-Count: 2.9k

Pairings: Platonic Moralogince, Platonic Anxceitmus

Warnings: Angst, Crying, Panic, Murder Mention, Death Mention, Hurt/Comfort, Bittersweet Ending Kinda?, No Unsympathetic Sides At Worst Morally Grey

Hi, anyone remember the random ficlet I posted in pieces months back that ended all happily? Well, I expanded upon it and here we are. Or in other news, here’s my take on a Split Fic, and it’s not your typical take in my humble opinion.

A clatter echoed in the throne room. A golden crown laid cracked in two. A soft thud followed it as a red sash carelessly engulfed the crown. An exhale, long and strained. Silence. Then a sob as a prince fell to the ground, shattering.

A battered and beaten Heart came along searching for the Prince. He called out his name, searching the castle high and low. But the Prince did not answer nor did the Heart catch a glimpse of him. When the Heart entered the throne room, he kept his gaze on the empty throne. It was not until his foot caught on something that he drew his attention to the marble floor.

“Oh my!” the Heart gaped, eyes watering, “Oh dear!”

Lying at the Heart’s feet, was the fragmented remains of the once bold and boisterous Prince. The Heart touched a piece, a chill pulsing through him at its cold, ceramic touch.

Great globs of tears fell down the Heart’s face as he toppled to the floor in anguish.

He gathered the pieces close to his chest, trying to put the beloved Prince back together again. But for all the Heart’s earnest efforts, the pieces only fractured and splintered into more.

The Heart placed his head into his hands, shaking. He was not good enough to save the Prince. Worse than that, he not only failed but he had damaged the Prince further. He could feel his insides growing frayed, threatening to unravel and come unmade like the Prince himself.

But with a breath of air, he held it together. He may not have the ability to put back together the Prince, but perhaps the Scholar could.

The Scholar was smart. His idea of fun afternoon involved delving into complex, convoluted math theorems. Out of anyone in the realm of Thomas, the Heart trusted him most in solving the matter of the broken Prince.

Lifting a hand away from his face, the Heart summoned him. The Scholar arrived, completely oblivious. His eyes closed, hands tightly clasped around his bowtie. “Welcome to the Jungle, it’s so exciting--” the Scholar recited, in a spoken monotone measure.

The Heart pulled incessantly on the Scholar’s pants leg to grab his attention. This caused the Scholar to jump back, startled. His eyes flew open, trailing down at the Heart and then to the porcelain remains of the Prince.

Usually, the Scholar was never one at a loss for words. He was always the first to ask questions, to seek knowledge to better equip himself and others. But he kept staring at the scene before him, seemingly having lost the capability of speech.

Then a strange stifled noise came from the Scholar. As if there was a blockage in his lungs, a spear that punctured all the air out of them. But of course, there was no spear sticking out of his chest. No logical reason for such a noise to occur. With a face devoid of all emotion, the Scholar knelt down beside the Heart.

He picked up a piece, examining it with an analytical touch, short of licking it. Licking things was a very scientific tool. A tool he refrained from deploying at this moment.

“It’s him isn’t it?” The Scholar said at last, frowning, “But how? It does not make logical sense.”

“No, it doesn’t,” The Heart piped up, “but his realm doesn’t tend to follow the rules of reality. But you can fix this, right? Undo wh–whatever this is?”

The Scholar frowned, eyeing the ceramic shards carefully.

“It is always easier to destroy than to create,” He began, “Or recreate in this instance. However, that does not mean it is improbable.”

A spark of hope ignited in Heart. So you can do it?!”

“I can try,” The Scholar amended, “There is, of course, a possibility it will not work at all.”

The Scholar placed the piece in his hand on the floor along with the rest. Then he stood up, outstretching a hand.

“You should get back.” He advised. The Heart nodded, scampering a few feet back for good measure.

Satisfied with this, the Scholar’s eyes glowed indigo as he called forth his power. Nonsensical, really, but it was how the Prince’s dominion interpreted him; a wizened wizard with a terrifying amount of power. The Scholar restored sensibility to its whimsy. He could reduce a magical unicorn to an average horse.

Something similar could be applied in this situation. He would take the shattered statue and return its original completely whole flesh-and-blood state. He just had to focus and recall every factual evidence he knew of the Prince. Chips and chunks of ceramic floated in the air, swirling as they came together again. At first the shape was ambiguous.

But as more and more pieces flew up, it became more apparent. A graceful swoop of auburn hair. A chiseled perfectly-formed jaw. A white tunic with a red sash spilling across the chest.

Bit by bit, their treasured prince was returning to them at last.

As the last piece fell into place, a bright light burst forth, filling up the entirety of the throne room. Both the Heart and the Scholar were knocked to the ground by its force. As quickly as it came, it faded.

“Ouch.” Heart murmured, still keeping a hand over his stinging eyes. The Scholar tried forcing his eyes open, but a wave of nausea hit him. He slumped back down, drained from the massive amount of energy he’d expended.

The sound of strutting boots reached both their ears, growing louder as it neared. Then it stopped.

“Helloooo?”

The Heart opened his eyes. Through his burning, black-spot riddled vision, the Prince’s befuddled face greeted him. Whole and complete with no signs of cracked lines running across his sun-kissed skin.

“Prince!” The Heart exclaimed, jumping to his feet to embrace him, “You’re okay!”

“Whoa!” The Prince said, holding out his arms for balance. He nearly collapsed regardless when a second set of arms engulfed him. Despite being adamant against physical touch, the Scholar was also…hugging him?

“Not that I don’t appreciate being lavished with displays of affection, I must ask–what in Walt Disney’s name is going on?”

“We thought we lost you!” The Heart wailed, “and that you wouldn’t ever be coming back!”

“Indeed, th-the possibility of you returning to your full stature was low.” The Scholar said, leaning heavily on the other two for support.

“Well that’s preposterous!” The Prince declared, bringing his arms around his friends, “You should know that a hero like myself could never die.”

“Pompous as always.” The Scholar snorted, but there was no true malice to it.

“Are you feeling alright?” The Heart queried.

“I’m right as rain!” The Prince said with a wide smile, “I admit, I’m very fuzzy on what happened, but I feel much better now.”

“That would make sense, seeing as we found you in actual pieces.”

The Heart sniffled, burying his head into the Prince’s tunic. “I love you two so much, you know that right?”

“Of course we know, you tell us this every day,” The Scholar responded. Neither Heart nor Scholar saw the hesitation dancing in the Prince’s eyes before it was overswept by a glimmering gleam.

“And we love you very much, Heart,” The Prince said, “Why, I’d fight a thousand dragons to keep you safe!”

The Heart giggled at this. Then wailed, leaving wet spots in the Prince’s pristine clothing. “Th--that’s lovely, but all I want is to cuddle with you and Scholar watching Disney movies and never ever ever let go!”

“That’s ridiculous,” Scholar said, “you’d have to let go at some point--”

“Scholar,” The Prince said, holding up a hand, “Not the time.”

The Prince then massaged the Heart’s scalp, carefully untangling his locks of hair. “My Dear Heart, I apologize. I didn't mean to distress you or the Scholar so. If that’s what you wish for me to do with you two for the rest of the night, I shall do that.”

“I would not be opposed to that.” The Scholar agreed, “As long as we go to bed at an appropriate time--”

“Then it’s settled!” The Prince exclaimed, “Come on, let us build the most magnificent blanket fort!”

With a snap of his fingers, the three vanished.

The throne room stood silent once more, absent of any apparent sentient life. All that remained was a dusty floor and a crown broken in two. It remained this way only just mere moments. For a Snake came slithering around, forked tongue sniffing the air. Scuttling after him came a Spiderling. All eyes and legs and not much else.

“Snake, why are we here?” The Spiderling asked, “This is the Prince’s domain! He won’t be happy if he finds us here!”

“Shush, Spiderling. Everything will be fineee.” Snake reassured, picking up the broken halves of the Prince’s golden crown. He examined them closely with a careful eye.

“Just because you say that doesn’t make it true!” Spiderling scowled, stomping a leg.

“If you’re so worried, you didn’t have to come.”

Spiderling mumbled something. The Snake raised an eyebrow, “Come again?”

“I came because I wanna protect you from getting hurt!” The Spiderling burst out, face flushing red.

“Aww, I despise you too,” The Snake cooed, ruffling Spiderling’s hair. The latter let out a shriek, hands flying to fix his hair at once.

“But you know I am totally a damsel-in-distress. Completely incapable of defending myself. Besides, surely you felt it too--the Disturbance.”

The Spiderling nodded, grimacing, “I felt Prince...he...is that his crown?!”

“Yes. Just like him to leave such a beloved possession broken and abandoned on the floor, hm?”

“Let me touch it,” The Spiderling pleaded. For he could draw the slightest hint of misery into himself with a simple touch. And with that misery, perhaps a glimpse into what tragedy befell the prince.

The Snake hesitated, before nodding his head. The Spiderling then stood up on the tippy-toes of his numerous legs, tracing one of his fingers on the remains of the crown lying in the Snake’s hands. A spark of anguish jolted the Spiderling at once.

He experienced a pounding, excruciating headache. A mind torn in two, attempting to entertain two polarizing ideas at once. Anger, sadness, frustration crashed down upon the Spiderling wave after wave. It sought to overwhelm, drive him to self-destruction like it had the young Prince.

The Spiderling cried out in pain, his hands cradling his face as he dropped to the floor. A series of metallic clangs followed and then the Snake was at his side.

“Spider!” The Snake cried, laying a cool hand on top of the Spiderling’s, “You’re okay, you’re fine, everything’s fineeeee.”

The Spiderling’s eyes glowed gold for a second, his face relaxing completely. Slowly, the gold left his eyes and he dug his face into the Snake’s satin vest with a whimper.

“I knew it, I knew I shouldn’t have allowed you to touch it,” The Snake said, stroking the other’s unruly mop of hair in a soothing manner.

“I’m okay,” The Spiderling grumbled, “Dealt with worse.”

“Lie.”

“M-maybe, but Prince, he’s--” The Spiderling hesitated, tears gathering in his eyes, “I think he’s dead!”

“I’m not!” A voice said, hauntingly cheery, “but I wish I was!”

Both Snake and Spiderling froze, each gazing at the throne room every which way. But besides themselves, there was no one else there.

The Snake’s slitted eye narrowed, “Who are you?”

“I’m the Prince!” The voice claimed, “Or at least, I was. Still am? It’s very unclear. I’m the pieces they forgot, the pieces nobody knew about! Hiding away, like an axe murderer hiding in a closet to kill you in your sleep!”

The Spiderling shuddered at the simile, both sets of arms clinging to Snake for dear life. He was very much content to allow Snake to do the talking for the two of them.

“What do you mean?” The Snake asked.

“Well, you see, I--the Prince--again, very confusing like that weird nightmare Thomas had about eating chocolate-covered teeth--had an argument with himself, ourselves? And his--my head hurt, like it was gonna explode! And so we did! Into itty bitty pieces of confetti and blood and guts!”

The Disturbance. The Snake’s blood ran cold at this. All this time the Prince was dealing with something on the levels of this, and he had no idea? How could the Snake not sense this hidden turmoil?

That was what the Snake was best at--knowing the jagged truths behind brightly-painted facades. If he’d known--he could’ve possibly helped--well, it didn’t matter now.

Out loud, the Snake simply deadpanned, “Delightful.”

“Isn’t it?!” The voice shrieked, two green eyes bulging with excitement, “Anywho, that’s when Mr. No Fun showed up and started boo-hooing. He tried to fix it, but he just made it worse! So that’s when he invited Smartypants to join the party.”

“Heart and Scholar?”

“Winner, winner, chicken-weiner!” Two hands abruptly appeared, clapping, “Now I like Smartypants, but like I said, he’s a Smartypants, thinks he knows everything there is to know and hates when we--I make things up just because!”

“I feel your pain.”

“Do you?” A several sets of needle-thin, sharp teeth jutted out.

The Snake waved a hand, “Not literally. I don’t presume to know what your pain feels like because I am not you. But I’ve had my run-ins with the Scholar and while an...useful asset to Thomas, I agree he can be difficult to deal with.”

Something green and sticky coiled around the Snake’s bottom reptilian half, entangling the end of his tail. “Ooh I like you!”

Another green-and-sticky something attached to the Spiderling, who did his very best to stay still and not freak. “And I also like you, even though you haven’t said much! What’s your favorite Disney villain?”

“M-maleficient.” The Spiderling said in a hoarse whisper.

“Ooh, sick. I like Ursula because she has two pet eels and when I--we--Thomas grows up, I think we should totally get two pet moray eels and we can feed people we don’t like to them--”

“That’s very nice and you can tell us that wonderful idea later,” The Snake cut in, “but what happened with Scholar and Heart?”

“Oh, alright,” A black boot stomped in mild irritation, “So you know Humpty Dumpty? He’s always depicted as an egg, but it never says that in the rhyme! It’s kinda like that. Smartypants tried putting him--me--us back together again but he got it all wrong!”

A translucent head appeared, shaking side to side in indignation.

“Y’see, when he put the Prince back together again, he based it off of what he remembered the Prince being. All the pieces he thinks makes who me--him--the Prince is. All. The. Pieces. That. Aren’t. ME!” The fiery flash in the green eyes was the only warning the two received before the physical glimpses dissipated completely.

“P-prince?” The Snake called out, uncharacteristically hesitant, “Are you still with us?”

“Don’t! Don’t call me that.”

“Well, what can we call you then?” The Snake amended, withholding a sigh of relief.

“Can I...can I be called the Kraken?”

“Of course, you can be called whatever you’d like.”

An ear-splitting screech sounded in the throne room, causing the Snake to slightly regret his statement. Only slightly, because it was very clearly a joyous screech.

There was a green shimmer in the air and then within a blink, a boy. A boy who looked remarkably similar to the beloved Prince, but not quite. The green tentacles attached to his back was the most glaringly obvious difference.

But there were more subtle ones. Half-healed scrapes and faded scars. Something the Prince would never allow to blemish his skin. A white strand of hair nestled among the boy’s auburn locks of hair. A black raggedy shirt and a pair of green pants that looked closer to a pirate’s garb than a prince’s attire.

“I’m the Kraken! Not a stinky loser prince!” The boy whooped and with a running start, crashed into the Snake and the Spiderling. His tentacles surrounded them and the Snake was certain it’d be hard to escape their suction-cup grip anytime soon.

He was worried that the Spiderling would panic and sink his fangs into the Kraken. Instead, the Spiderling comfortingly stroked the Kraken’s hair just like the Snake had previously done for him.

The Snake repressed a smile at this. “Kraken, what would you like to do?”

“Cry, I think.” The Kraken responded, promptly bursting into tears. The Spiderling joined him, the poor thing, soaking in the Kraken’s fear and grief.

“Shh, my dears, it’ll be alright,” The Snake promised, “Forget the others, the three of us can be our own little family. How does that sound?”

“S-sounds good,” The Kraken hiccuped, “Don’t know why I--we--him were so mean to you two, I’m--I’m s-s-s-sorry--”

“Shhh, it’s okay,” The Snake said, “don’t force yourself to talk, let it all out.”

The Kraken obliged, wailing as if the world had ended and all that remained was a trillion bits of space dust. Which, in a way, it felt that way for him. Have you ever been torn in two? Literally? It was an anguish that any amount of words regardless of language would fail to adequately capture.

It was a wound that wouldn’t, couldn’t, ever fully heal. There were some days, he wasn’t fully there, in mind or in body. Sometimes just a flash of needle-thin teeth. A warm breath behind your ears. A shadow in the corner of your eyes.

But regardless of whatever remnant of him was coherent, he had a family who loved whichever remnant that was there. And for a long, long while, things were happyish.

#sanders sides #roman sanders #remus sanders #janus sanders #patton sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #kat writes #split fic #not neccesarily #what i consider canon #just a fun what-if y'know?

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klauskalgreeves · 3 years

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Rakata Prime was an unaffiliated planet on the outer rim. Claims had been reported to the GAR that there had been a hostile invasion of separatist forces terrorising the natives, and the Supreme Chancellor had sanctioned that the nearest General and Clone division investigate these claims. Given their close proximity to the planet (being in the Outer Rim at the time) the 212th had been selected to inspect the nature of such allegations. Cody and a squad were sent ahead of time (with great displeasure to all those involved) as Obi-Wan and the rest of the battalion were needed to wind up on a humanitarian mission they were currently engaged in.

They had landed on the planet two days ago, having spent the first few days taking notes of the landscape and designing a battle plan. Rakata prime was a primarily dry planet, with extensive plains of nothing but farmland and rolling trees.

Easy enough to stay discrete if they stuck to the tree line. But with enough space to plant their heavy guns as a second line of defence.

In all it was the kind of planet Cody had seen a hundred times over.

Once he’s briefed the men he gives the order to press forward, standing back and watching as the troopers move out. His initial intention had been to comm his general in the quiet revive and give him a quick update before the fight begins.

This pause allows him to catch two stragglers fall behind.

He frowns, observing from his vantage point as the two figure seems to linger close to the tree line. The cleanliness of their armour is a straight give away that they’re both shinies: as is their demeanour.

From what he can see, one man is tugging at the others shoulder, helmet whipping back and forth in a way Cody knows is more nervous than observational. His partner is crouched on the ground, hand smoothing over something in the dirt.

Once it appears that the two are going to fall behind Cody starts forward, approaching the pair.

They don’t notice him straight away (something he’s going to have to take note of), but now he is closer he can half understand why. The shiny on the ground is fixated and the shiny trying to pull him away is muttering a nervous spiel of regulations, fingers of his spare hand tapping a nervous ‘click click click’ against his thigh plate in a way Cody is surprised the Kaminoan’s didn’t condition out of him.

“Find anything interesting?” He asks, crossing his arms and taking a step back as the pair shoot upwards instantly, fumbling to remove their buckets.

“Commander!”

“Sir! Commander! Sir!”

Both men are now standing at attention in front of him, which gives Cody a better chance to scrutinise them.

As he had initially distinguished, their armour is squeaky clean- not a scratch or battle tell insight. In fact, it’s painfully apparent that the two men haven’t even had the chance to settle onto the negotiator: the colours of the 212th are absent from their helmets.

The lack of time clearly hadn’t deterred the curious trooper from trying, however, given his paint-stained fingertips. A sloppy line of gold has been added to his companion's chest plate, streaky in a way that comes with using fingers instead of a brush. On his own armour, there is a slapdash attempt at what looks like a wave on his shoulder plate: though it’s clearly bled and looks more like he’s leaned against a wet wall.

Cody appreciates their attempts at individuality, though he is less than impressed by their carelessness so thus displayed.

“What’s your name, troopers?”

Gold fingertips answers first. “I’m jitter! Sir! Commander, I mean. My names Jitter.”

Nervous tapper answers second. “Click, Sir.”

‘That makes sense’ Cody thinks, inclining his helmet and purposely looking in the direction the rest of the squad is headed- now out of sight.

“Well Jitters and Click, you must have a good reason to be falling behind on your first campaign. I’d love to hear it, since it was clearly so important.”

Click begins talking before he’s even finished his sentence, fingers tightening into fists and relaxing. It seems the longnecks had tried to curb the habit after all.

“We are so sorry, Commander. We didn’t mean to fall behind; we can only apologise. We’ll join the rest of the men and report to you afterwards for punishment. Again, we're sorry. Come on, Jit.”

But Jitter doesn’t seem so inclined to move. The shiny hesitates, feet shuffling from side to side in a way that isn’t necessarily nervous. In fact, Cody would stipulate that the movements are not born from anxiety, but are a way of whipping up as much dust from the ground as possible.

“It was my fault, sir. Click has nothing to do with it. We’ll be on our way now; I only got distracted by the flowers.”

That pauses his impeding lecture, if only for the sheer irregularity of the sentence.

“The flowers?”

Instead of speaking Jitter produces a small white flower and holds it up in presentation.

“You’ve fallen behind and risked attack for flowers?” Cody asks incredulously, quirking his eyebrow.

Click’s face is now flushed, and Jitter seems at least abashed, ducking his head down to look at the plant in his hand. “I’m aware it sounds bad. It’s just... we’ve never seen one before, sir. I was only curious, see. We’ve been on Kamino this whole time- we didn’t know there was ground that wasn’t hard and that places didn’t rain all day. And I saw the flowers and got distracted. I’ve only ever seen them in a book, once. I didn’t know they were real things. But it's my fault we've fallen behind; Click doesn't deserve to be punished for my mistakes.”

Cody is taken aback, and the lecture he had prepared dies in his throat.

Sometimes he forgets what it’s like to be a shiny leaving Kamino. Perhaps it was different from him- he was CC class, and his training left absolutely no room or time for curiosity. But for many of their men it’s natural to be fascinated by all the little things life offers.

He’s never met anyone spellbound by dirt and flowers, but the innocence and childlike wonder are vaguely endearing.

Cody sighs, switching his gaze between the two until he starts to see them physically squirm before he beckons his head in the direction of the trees. “Hm. Well, Jitter, I’m sure you’ll have plenty of time after this campaign to explore the exciting properties of dirt. But right now, you’re needed on the front lines. Move out, troopers.”

This seems to spur both men, and Click begins pushing at his brothers back, casting a thankful look at him.

“Sir, yes, sir,” they reply in tandem, straightening their spines and marching on in the direction the others went in.

Cody takes a moment to watch them, shaking his head fondly under his helmet before he follows behind.

Looks like he’s got another twin pair on his hands. If their anything like Waxer and Boil, he’s looking forward to getting to know them.

———

If Cody thought the battle was bloody, the aftermath was bloodier.

He stands amongst a sea of white plastoid that had once been reverently marked with gold markings- now stained red and splattered with mud.

Around him, the bustling sounds of equipment being packed up is eerily loud compared to the oppressive silence that comes with loss. As always, he feels a weighty sense of responsibility as he looks out at the bodies of his brothers: those he knew personally and those who had only just left Kamino. Death does not discriminate; he understands, but Cody is their Commander, and every battle his men die is another blow to his unwavering resolve.

Sighing heavily he scrubs a hand down his face, allowing a lingering moment to breathe through the brief flare of anger he feels at the fact they cannot recover the bodies and give them the funeral they deserve. Such is the consequence of war, apparently. His only solace is that they will have a remembrance ceremony later to share memories about their brothers who are now marching on.

It’s as he’s walking back to the ship that his attention is snared. To his left are two bodies: one thrown over the other. It is not unusual for some of the vode to defend their ori’vod or batch mate. However, what catches his eye is the unusual armour decoration- a poorly painted chest plate, streaks still visibly even under a layer of grime. His stomach drops instantly and he drops his gaze without much thought to the clone curled underneath, catching sight of painted fingertips curled around a fistful of dirt.

A crushed flower lies just out of reach, yellow this time.

Cody closes his eyes.

Here lies a body of a shiny who had only just stepped foot off Kamino. He didn’t know some places didn’t rain. He hadn’t seen vast planets of grassland; he hadn’t seen the great desert plains and the bustle of city planets like Courscant. He had barely seen any of this universe, and now he never will.

He died in the mud that he had found so fascinating only hours before, along with his brother who radiated nerves and careful consideration.

They were just shinies. They were just kids.

But the Republic don’t see them that way. They’re just soldiers, to them.

They’re nothing but buckets. Feet on the ground. Numbers.

Cody signs again, allowing one last moment to glance at the sad scene. Such is the way of war, he understands. But that doesn’t make it much more manageable.

It never has, and it never will.

He bends down, picking up the crushed flower and places it on Jitters chest plate. Then he straightens his shoulders and moves on, heading back to the ship so they can meet the rest of the 212th at the rendezvous.

——

At remembrance that night, no one comments on the freshly painted flower on his shoulder pad.

No one needs to.

After all, no one understands loss quite like the clones.

They don’t have possessions. They don’t have homes with trinkets and items. Memories are all they have, and dedications are all they can give.

Jitter and Click never got to experience much in their life cycle, but Cody won’t let that be in vain. He’ll live for them.

And from now on, he'll take more time to appreciate the flowers.

#okay this has been rattling in my head since I watched the episode #and is based on my last post #but i can’t stop being sad about the clones #ughhhh #anyway #the clones deserve better #commander cody #enjoy my oc’s I love them #I’m sorry I killed them #Cody is the big brother who’s long suffering but he loves all his brothers #the clone wars #my Drabble #this kinda grew arms and legs it was only meant to be like 500 words ahahaha #bad batch

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aspenflower17 · 3 years

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Finding You (Part 17 of ??)

Hello everyone! Thank you all for being so patient! I had pretty bad writers block and couldn’t figure out where I wanted the story to go from the last chapter. I was also dealing with some irl problems as well. It seems like a lot of creators were having the same problems though January and February though. Hopefully March will make everything smooth out! I think I figured out where to go from here (I have the end all planned out, but getting there without ruining the pacing is what’s been giving me problems). I appreciate everyone’s patience while I figured things out, and hopefully I can get back on a normalized schedule!

Anywho, if you’re new to this story and would like to start at the beginning, here’s the link to part 1. Every chapter should have a link to the next part at the end, so hopefully you decide to read it all :D

Tags <3 : @simpingforsatan @naimena @hachimochi @wrathandgreed @magi-minminxiii @rensphilia @a-dream-at-night @chloelikesobeyme @getbehindme-satan @theuglypugling @oofthelazyweeb @mammonismyfirstman (I’m not great about putting this on every chapter, but if you want to be added to the tags list, just comment below asking to be added (I don’t want to assume everyone commenting wants a tag so just make sure to mention tag in the comment) or you can send me a DM :) Also, I just went through all the chapters so far and I think I have everyone. If I missed you just remind me and I’ll put you in!)

Word Count: 2566

TW: some angst relating to last chapter but that’s about it

Satan sat in his room, contemplating whether telling Mc about Michael was a good idea or not. It’d been a couple days since she’d come over and he hadn’t heard anything from her. It was worrying him more than he wanted to admit, but he knew from spending a lot of time with her as a human, it would be a better idea for him to leave her alone until she was ready to talk to him. From the way she speaks about him, it’s pretty clear their relationship is a bit strained. Actually, it reminds me a bit of me and Lucifer, though with obvious differences.

While the Avatar of Wrath would never admit it aloud, he did have a kind of respect for Lucifer. It took a different form than anyone else’s mostly because he knew him. All of him. Flaws, strengths, weaknesses, secrets. Well, at least up until his birth. He’d had no idea about Lilith and what Lucifer had done. Lucifer had definitely changed a lot since the Fall, but Satan could generally figure out what he was thinking or how he was going to respond to a situation. So, what was going on with Mc and Michael?

Obviously he didn’t want her talking with him at least. There was probably some fear she’d fall, taking the path of her ancestor but for a being in the Devildom. He couldn’t see any war resulting from her Falling. It would be from her own choice, with no forbidden fruit or humans involved. He was pretty sure Michael didn’t feel anything romantic for her, so it probably wasn’t anything involved in wanting her to stay for him. So why?

He was pulled from his thoughts by his DDD ringing. Hoping it was Mc, he answered by the second ring, “Hello?”

“Congratulations! You’ve won an-” Satan growled and hung up. Stupid solicitor.

There was a knock at his door, “Yo Satan. I got somethin’ for ya’,” Satan sighed, but got up to answer the door. Pulling it open, he saw Mammon and Mc on the other side, “Said she wanted ta talk ta ya. It sounded urgent so…” Mammon smiled a bit apologetically.

“That’s quite alright. Mc, hello. How lovely to see you. Do you want to come in?”

“I’d appreciate that. Thank you,” Mc entered his room as Satan shot daggers through his eyes at Mammon.

“A little warning next time would be nice.”

“Oi! If ya hadn’t been so… gloomy lately maybe I wouldn’t have been so worried- No, ya should just be grateful to the Great Mammon. I’m not an errand boy ya know,” and with that, Mammon stalked off down the hallway.

Satan rolled his eyes, but didn’t say anything back. He understood Mammon was just trying to help him, “Well, it’s nice to see you Mc. How… Are you okay?” Mc was turning slowly, looking at his room in awe. He would’ve just figured she was simply impressed by his room like she had been the other first time she’d seen it, but she looked rattled.

“Oh! I was just… Umm… Your collection is really impressive,” she deflected his question, smiling. The unease remained in her eyes though.

“Yes. This is my personal collection,” Satan answered, leaving his question unanswered.

“It’s quite… impressive,” as she turned, Satan caught her frown again. Does she not like how messy it is?

“Though they’re not all on shelves, I make sure they’re all kept in good shape. I honestly just don’t have enough wall space or bookshelves for them all.”

“Oh… I understand. I tend to get book piles too,” Mc answered, a bit caught off guard.

So it’s not the mess. What could it be?

“So, what are you doing here? Not that I’m not happy to see you. I just haven’t heard from you for a couple days.”

“I’m sorry about that and just showing up out of the blue like this. I had a lot to think about after… last time, and some things to research. Then inspiration randomly struck for my next art show. Not to mention, Michael’s been keeping a close eye on me ever since he blew up. I wanted to see you, and I didn’t even think to message you first. I’m sorry about that.”

Satan was at a loss for words. She wanted to come see me. She wanted to see me so much, she just showed up. I should really say something to her right now, but I’m not sure what to say.

“You’re not angry with me, are you?” Mc turned back to him, looking worried.

“Of course not. I was afraid you were possibly upset with me, and Lucifer I suppose, for what we told you. I know hearing something like that must be hard.”

Mc smiled, “Well, that’s good to know. As to what you told me… I do trust you guys. More so than I trust most of the other angels in fact… But you are demons and what you told me was… Anyway, I was researching what you told me to see if I could corroborate your story and I did find a couple different mentions of Lilith, one of which told of a connection between her and the fruit. I couldn’t prove or disprove the claims that he… That he was the one that shot her, but with how defensive he immediately got after I mentioned seven angels falling instead of six… I… I can’t bring myself to believe he’d do something that terrible yet, but I do believe you guys on everything else, and… it’s not beyond the realm of possibility. In any case, the Celestial Realm definitely covered up much of the war, including its causes. I had a suspicion when I originally learned about it, but figured it was all just in my head,” Mc looked Satan straight in the eyes, “I want to thank you for being honest with me.”

“How are you so sure we didn’t lie to you? Like you said, we are demons.”

“Call it a hunch,” Mc smiled, “Anyway, I really appreciate it, and I wanted you to have this,” she handed him a very lifelike drawing, “I thought you might like cats, so I frew my favorite one from the Celestial Realm.”

Satan couldn’t believe his eyes, “Leo?”

“Huh?”

“That’s Leo. I… half adopted him a while ago.”

“How can you tell?”

“Well, he’s got hearts all over him right? The one on his forehead and chest are the most prominent, but there’s a couple more on his back and stomach right? Hold on. I have a couple photos here,” and Satan went rustling through a drawer. It was hard to find a photo of him without Mc, but he knew there were some. Leo was a cat that he and Mc had adopted together. She’d used all her charm and reasoning skills to get Lucifer to agree to allowing a cat in the house. She had promised him it would only be the one cat, though they secretly were planning on getting another once Leo passed. They unfortunately didn’t get the chance to see that happen, as Mc passed away before Leo did. Lucifer had allowed Satan to keep the cat as a way to cope with Mc’s death. He listened to me! I told him to go find his Mom once he left me, and he did! I’m so happy!

He finally found a good picture to show Mc, “See? Same cat.”

“Oh my! You’re right! That’s incredible!”

“So, you said he was your favorite?”

“Yeah. Because of how transient most cats are, they don’t spend long in the Celestial Realm. He may not spend a lot of time with me, but I do see him around a lot, and he has comforted me before. A lot of the other angels think he was a pet of mine from my human life, and that's why he sticks around.”

“Well, who wouldn’t want to stay with you?”

Mc looked up at Satan, “You really think that?”

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I?”

“You didn’t even know me then. What if I was boring or really dumb in the human realm?”

Satan slapped himself internally for not being more careful, “I highly doubt you were either of those two things. I know when people come down here, they don’t lose any of their personality.”

“Really?”

“Yup. It makes the whole process of breaking them so much more entertaining,” seeing Mc’s worried expression, he cleared his throat and moved on, “With that line of thinking, angels would be the same way. Your placement was just decided by how good you were in life.”

“What if I was a Wanderer though?”

Satan sucked in a breath at that. She had been a Wanderer? There was a chance she could have ended up here with him?

“There’s a lot of theories on why someone might Wander. None of them are conclusive though. I wouldn’t worry too much about it if I were you.”

“Satan?”

“Yes?”

“When the time comes, will you answer my questions?” Mc didn’t look at Satan, but he had the feeling this was an extremely important question.

“Of course I will.”

Satan watched some tension leave Mc’s body, as she turned to him and smiled sincerely, “Thank you.”

“Well, of course. That’s assuming I can answer them.”

“I have a feeling you’ll be able to,” she answered cryptically.

“Very well then. Since you’re here, would you like to stay and read? Or we can go somewhere if you’d like,” she turned to him, and he couldn’t help the words that fell from his lips, “I just want to spend some time with you.”

Mc looked a bit shocked, but then she smiled softly, “I’d really like that.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They decided on reading, but not before they went downstairs to grab some snacks. As predicted, Beel was there as well.

“Hey Mc,” Beel grinned, his feast not yet begun.

“Hi Beelze… Actually, is it alright if I call you Beel?”

“Huh? Why wouldn’t it be okay?” Beel cocked his head to the side in confusion.

“It’s just… I don’t know you very well, so I didn’t know if it was alright. Plus, they always refer to you as Beelzebub in the Celestial Realm.”

“Wait… Do they talk about us up in the Celestial Realm?”

“Not a lot, but when speaking about our history they do talk about you all, especially Lucifer.”

“What do they say about me?” Beel had grabbed his wrist.

“Yeah, what do they say about us? I wanna know,” Belphie’s head popped out from underneath the table, making Mc yelp a little and grabbed onto Satan’s arm. His hand automatically covered hers, a reflex from when she had been a human.

“Oh yeah. Belphie’s here too,” Beel added happily, watching the angel and his brother.

Belphie smirked, eyes on their arms, “So, what do they say about us?”

“You give me a near heart attack and then carry on like nothing happened?” Mc asked, a bit embarrassed.

“Your fault for not looking,” Belphie grunted, looking at Satan who was nearly frozen in place, his eyes focused on the point of contact, “You woke me up so maybe you should be apologizing to me.”

“Belphie, don’t be mean. You were hiding weren’t you?” Beel asked.

“Well, yeah, but that’s not the point. And how long are you going to keep clinging to my brother like that? I know he’s stronger than me, but I’m not going to hurt you.”

Mc looked to see she was still grabbing Satan’s arm, “Eep! S-Sorry! I didn’t realize,” she removed herself and took a step away, face burning.

“That’s quite alright Mc,” Satan managed to get out.

“So, what’d you guys come down here for?” Beel asked, frowning a bit at Belphie.

“Ah, right. Snacks. We came down for snacks,” Mc said quickly, face still flushed.

“I can help with that,” Beel said, “Come over here Mc and I’ll help you pick food out.” By the time their snacks were decided, both Mc and Satan had to carry them up to his room.

“We have way too many snacks,” Satan observed, “I’ll still have some in my room a month from now.”

“Awww, come on you guys! I went down to resupply early to avoid Beel taking everything, but it was really you two I needed to watch out for?”

“He was already there when we went down. He sent us back with all this,” Satan answered, not really wanting to deal with Levi at the moment. The twins had already taken up enough valuable reading time as it was.

“Of course he would. He never thinks about me when he cleans out the fridge. It’s not like it’s easy for me to just leave the house to go get something, but no one ever thinks about me. It’s probably because I’m a-”

“Oh, do you want these then?” Mc cut him off, extending her full arms.

“Wha…? You’re giving these to me?”

“Sure. Why not?” Mc smiled at him.

Levi’s eyes went wide and his lower lip quivered a bit, “You’re so kind. You’re truly an angel now.”

“Because I wasn’t before?” Mc chuckled.

Levi’s eyes got even wider and he looked down, “W-Well, I-I… Just… Thank you for the food. I think I need to go back to my room now!”

“Oh, sure. Here you go,” the snacks were handed off, Levi only dropping 3 in his haste, and then he was walking as quickly as he could down the hallway towards his room.

“That was weird,” Mc commented, watching him hurry down the hallway.

“He’s weird,” Satan sighed, extremely grumpy that Levi not only interrupted them but then said something so thoughtless, “Don’t worry about him.”

“Sure,” Mc replied, though he was sure she was still wondering about it.

“Let’s just get to my room before we’re interrupted by anyone else.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Satan closed his book and stretched, enjoying the increase in blood flow throughout his body, “How are you enjoying- Oh,” Mc, who he had given the bed to, the place she had read before they would read cuddled together, was asleep. She was breathing deeply, book still clutched in her hand.

Chuckling, Satan padded over to the bed, and pulled a blanket over her. Coincidentally, it was one she had given him. She had been convinced it was the best blanket for reading ever. He had put a perseverance spell on it so it never got worn past where it was comfortable. Now that he had it for a long time, he found himself agreeing with her.

He allowed himself a moment to admire her sleeping form, the muntins in his window throwing a line across her face. She adjusted in her sleep, pulling the blanket closer. She smiled sleepily, murmuring something that almost sounded like his name. She truly is just as beautiful as before she left that last time. The last time I ever saw her alive…

His hand caressed her jaw line before he knew what he was doing, “I’ll never lose you again. For as long as you’ll allow me in your life, I’ll be here. I promise you that,” he whispered, leaning down and lightly pressing his lips to her forehead.

She stirred at the contact, eyes opening sleepily and focusing on him, “Mnh, Satan?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As always, likes, comments and reblogs are always welcome! Until next time!

#obey me!#OBEY ME #obey me! swd #obey me! satan #satan obey me #obey me mc #obey me satan/mc #finding you #aspenflower17 #obey me long fic #obey me! shall we date?

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bastillewolf · 4 years

Text

It’s More About Looks Than Skill (VII)

Pairing: Ryuk/Reader.

Summary: Ryuk finds himself gaining feelings for Light Yagami’s best friend, but she doesn’t know he exists. When he makes the grave mistake of touching her, he makes things a lot more complicated.

Warnings: mentions of violence and death.

Notes: Been gone for a while, my apologies. Haven’t really been as hyped about Death Note as I used to be. But I want to finish this story for you all. Thank you for your patience. Furthermore, I won’t be responding to ‘when will you update?’ asks. I understand the excitement, but it doesn’t really help. Hope you understand. Sorry!

Tag list: @sarai-ibn-la-ahad, @rustypotatospork @mantisandthemoondragon @baby-queen-girl @itscalledtrust @emilyshurley @killtherandomness @selmeuuh @felicity291

If I wasn’t able to tag you, please check your settings and send me another ask. Thank you! Let me know if you’d like to be added to the list!

Chapter VII

It wasn’t unusual for her to be early to appointments these days. Her anxiety never really allowed her to be late anymore. But, for what it was worth, L seemed rather happy with the fact. He told her it always gave them more time to go over important information and that it showed him she realized the importance of the case.

“However, it also makes you think I’m Kira, doesn’t it?” she wondered.

“Elaborate,” he simply replied.

“My eagerness to participate only gives you all the more reason to suspect me. But if I were to be late, you might think I’d do it on purpose to avoid any detection. If I’m always right on time, it’d be too obvious that I’ve thought about it before. All cases give you a 50-50 chance, really. So, I’d suggest you stop paying attention to the clock every time I walk in, because it doesn’t give you any hints whatsoever.”

He smiled as he opened another stick of sugar and threw it in his coffee. “You explaining yourself to me tells me you’ve thought more about it than you should have. Which could also mean that you’re Kira. However, elaborating on your ideas about me looking at the clock every time you show up also tells me you’re more something of an open book.”

“Which brings us right back to stage one. What percentage do you give me to be Kira now?”

“Hm, I’d say about 70.”

“Wow, I’m honoured, really. Dropped 5 percent since last time.”

“The fact that you remembered that has brought you back to 80.”

She smirked. It was the little banter between them that made her less nervous about the elephant in the room that only she knew about; she knew who Kira was, and she couldn’t tell a soul.

Though Light had been an utter ass to her since the summer had started, she’d known him since they were just kids. She knew he must have his reasons, however stupid they might be, and she wasn’t just going to give up that life-long friendship in a heartbeat just because he was being ridiculous.

She couldn’t support Light knowing she’d be a fellow convict of murder herself, but she couldn’t stand the thought of him possibly being sent to prison, not to mention the possibility of him receiving death penalty. And where would Ryuk go? He would go back to the Shinigami realm, bored out of his mind and she’d never see him again. It’s why she’d decided to let things play out naturally and perhaps make some adjustments here and there on her own, if deemed necessary.

“I’m meeting Light later this afternoon,” L told her, “I hope you still don’t mind working with him?”

She shifted in her seat a bit. “Why would I mind working with him?”

L blinked. He knew that she knew he wasn’t stupid and didn’t know why she even bothered to try to cover up the fact they weren’t really on speaking terms. She rolled her eyes at his comically silent response, telling him she’d be fine. “It’s a serious case. I can act like a professional if he can, too.”

“Alright. I was only asking because I can’t have you back out of this case. You’re too valuable.”

“Too valuable?” she winked.

His pale cheeks were dusted in a rosy pink as she slipped her jacket back on. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Ryuuzaki. Have fun interrogating Light.”

“Thanks.”

Her walk home was enjoyed with a cool breeze breaking the sunlight on her skin. She felt a lot better now that she had something that could keep her busy. Though it did involve Light, she was glad she’d be out and about, making a difference instead of sulking in her room. Even if it was keeping the biggest secret anyone’s ever had to carry.

Even while considering the circumstances, she still remained more positive than during her former bleak vacation days.

Until she received a phone call.

“My dad’s in the hospital. He had a heart attack.”

One page taken from the Death Note, or even a fragment of the page, contains the full effects of the Note.

It appeared that Light’s father was doing a lot better since she’d picked up her phone and started her run to the hospital, because he was resting in bed and already talking business again with L and his son.

“So, Ryuuzaki, now that you’ve had the chance to talk to my son, is he cleared as a suspect?”

“When I say I suspect him, you should know it’s very minor,” L replied. She could tell he tried to communicate it in a more reassuring way, realistically because the man had just suffered from a heart attack. He wouldn’t be so gentle with him otherwise.

“And what about (Y/N)? You must know that she’s like a daughter to me. Her parents work a lot and she’s always been a trusted friend of my son’s.”

She met L’s dark eyes and shared a look with him. “80 percent,” she told Soichiro before the young man himself could answer.

“80 percent?! That’s outrageous!” the chief proclaimed.

“Don’t worry, mister Yagami. I don’t take it personally,” she insisted, “It makes more sense for me to be the bigger suspect. My parents, like you said, are often gone to work or business trips. I’ve been lucky that I’ve always had your family to support me, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t have had the potential trauma of loneliness since birth. I’m smart and have the grades to prove it, I really have no other friends than your son and have always had a tendency to rally against authority. I could have sociopathic tendencies and you wouldn’t even know about it, because, like you said, I’m like a daughter to you. It makes all the more sense that I’m Kira.”

Soichiro seemed at a loss for words, not sure if he should either be concerned or amazed. Perhaps both, he decided.

“Which is why she’s a key member of this case. I need to keep a close eye on her,” L added.

It was only then she decided to finally meet the eyes that had been drilling her since the moment she’d stepped into the room. She saw what the stress was doing to him, something only a trained eye who’d known him for years would recognize. And she faced the subtle emotion hidden behind the whole façade; the appreciation of her subtle way to shift the villain role to herself.

He followed her out when she went to grab a cup of tea.

“Why are you doing this?” he demanded.

She seeped the bag in the paper cup a few times before she decided to speak to him directly. “Why am I doing what?” she decided to play.

“We haven’t been friends since before the summer started. Why are you suddenly being… supportive?” He wasn’t sure who was listening, so the best way for him to go at this is to involve their personal affairs to cover up the main issue. He knew she’d understand what he really meant, after all.

“Oh, I’m sorry, it’s something called ‘human decency’. I know you don’t have a concept of that, since I wasn’t the one who just cut off all forms of communication with my best friend, after all.

“I thought you’d understand,” he ground out.

“I do understand, Light. I understand that you’re an absolute idiot for thinking you could take on this ‘case’ without me. You’re never going to be able to handle this on your own. Even with your dad there, or someone like Ryuuzaki, no one knows what you’re really struggling with. What you’re really going through right now.”

He remained silent.

“I don’t forgive you for ignoring me all summer. I don’t forgive you for not being the friend I needed. But I won’t just stand by and watch you destroy yourself and the people you care about without a second thought. Because that’s what you’re doing now.”

She watched as his eyes fixated on the door of the room his father was staying in. It was an internal struggle, his mind telling him multiple things while his gut told him only one.

“Alright. I’m sorry,” he finally sighed, “I shouldn’t have done what I did, and I need my best friend back.”

“Wow, I didn’t think there was any room for sympathy left in that narcissistic brain of yours.”

“I will take that back if you continue to be arrogant, (Y/N),” he grumbled.

She snorted, “I’m always arrogant. It’s why you like me.”

“I suppose I can finally get Ryuk off my back now…”

#Death Note #Ryuk x reader #Light Yagami #Lawliet #Light yagami x reader #L #Fanfiction #Shinigami #Romance #Lawliet x reader #Anime #Manga

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datenoriko · 4 years

Note

Wondering if I could request some reactionary Headcanons for the warlords where MC is a highly trained and skillful forensic scientist?

I’m so sorry this is waaaay overdue and writing-wise is still unsure of the style... I hope this one’s okay though~ TnT

p.s. I tried adding Kennyo & Motonari too, but brain won’t let me ><

p.s.s. Updated masterlist for my random shenanigans here!

*Every one of them thought MC would be scared of a dead body and multitudes of it on the battlefield and beyond it but...

ODA FORCES

Nobunaga

- “Huh, this fireball’s not afraid of the dead?” // “I examine them for a living.” Visibly impressed, a devilish smirk forms on his lips

- The Devil King is fascinated by you actively asking to take her to battles to study the bodies

- “Look at this! With that deep slice on his jugular vein, no wonder he’ll die pretty quickly due to all that blood loss.” // “On his what?” // “T-the blood vessel found on the neck, my lord.” // *is confused*

- Nobunaga considers this carefully and commissions the armour makers to improve their designs, and/or trade for more sturdy materials with the Portuguese (you know… aside trading for konpeito :3)

- Lets you examine more specimens to determine all possible deaths in battle, and then have it discussed at the next council. It’s a great help for them in terms of preparation & strategizing. After all, prevention and preparation is still much better!

Hideyoshi

- A worried mother hen as always, all he wanted is for you to stay away from the worst sights possible and definitely not going straight towards them! “What do I keep telling you?” // “Uh, stay away from the corpses…?”

- Just like how his lord would sneak away to have konpeito, you also tend to get around stealthily just to study “them”

- Being a highly observation person due to your work, you even know which wooden floor in Azuchi will make a creaking sound and by instinct you will avoid it

- But Mamayoshi is just as observant as you are, and he caught you one night

- “I know you were once this ‘forensic expert’ from where you came from, but you are a princess now and must behave like one!” Legend has it that the lecture continues...

Mitsuhide

- Ah, he loves asking for your suggestions on how to get away with murder treason!

- I mean, he’s surely an expert but an additional piece of advice his little mouse wouldn’t hurt, right?

- “This place’s almost clean, I’d say.” // “’Almost’, little mouse? It scares me so that you have trained eyes for such matters. // “Is that a compliment? Anyway, I saw a strand of hair near the sliding door... and its color is much similar to yours. Care to explain?”

- Now he’s more careful than ever to leave any trace, knowing you can find him even with the smallest of clues

- The tables have turned for him after such a long time of being a sneaky fox

Masamune

- Oh boy, make sure you won’t overwork yourself by being with this man, being a battle-loving man that he is (meaning, more bodies and scenes to check out)

- At the same time, he finds it amusing that you proactively ask him to take you to his trips, campaigns and whatnots

- “It really is fun having you around, lass! Or should I say ‘partner’?” // “Damn straight, partner… now, let’s solve this case!” Cat-like grin commences for you two

- He sees you having fun hanging out at the scouts’ camp, chatting about experiences in the battlefield. your eyes would glimmer the more explicit they describe it. Creepy? Maybe a little, but at least he sees you happy about it… right?

- The One-Eyed Dragon will find this unusual, sure, but it certainly makes him want to know you more

Ieyasu

- Did he care at first? No, not really. He just wanted no involvement at first and to be left on his room alone, reading or eating extra-spicy food

- However, Yatsun gets curious when he finds you taking a peek at his medicinal work on a man he is a bit late to save :(

- “What are you doing here? You better not get in the way.” // “Oh no, poor man though… what’s the cause?” // “I am yet to find that out, if you’ll excuse me,---” // “Can I take a look?”

- He tries to pry you away from the room but being already in and touching the body leaves him no choice but to keep a close eye on you, making sure you’re not doing anything daft.

- “Huh, not bad.” Ieyasu says as you were able to identify the cause of death, deep inside he’s amazed of course. Later on he would let you join him in his post-mortem activities if the schedule allows to, but still keeping an eye on you to prevent any mishaps from happening

Mitsunari

- “Wow, MC-sama is unfazed as we all are in the battlefield! You truly are an amazing woman.” Did you see that sunny smile on his face as he says it???

- Your logical explanation as to identifying one’s death baffles the force’s cinnamon roll (because of the jargon used), otherwise it fascinates him

- Well, he’s never seen a woman who’s into dead bodies work-wise!

- Like some other warlords, he would ask you for advice when making strategies for the next battle

- When you went to his room one time to borrow a book, the first thing you said was “Am I in a crime scene?” when seeing piles of books around, untouched food and seeing a man unmoved in the middle of the room, reading and not even sensing your presence. “Ah no, just a normal room. I see.”

Ranmaru

- While in an errand, he sees you one day looking at a dead body about to be taken away. He is worried that the view might traumatize you for life… in the back of his mind he already has a plan to take you to a sweets shop and let you gorge in manjuu for the rest of the day

- “MC-sama, are you alright? You look shocked.” // “Yeah, I mean it looks to me that someone killed him when everybody says the opposite! I wanted to look into this so badly…” // “My apologies, but… what?”

- Of course it is never the answer he expected, but when you plead to help him solve it, this page is more than willing to do so

- Now both of you are going around the town looking for clues and asking who you think are involved; partners-in-crime!

- You did get to gorge on manjuu (and tea, lots of it) with Ranmaru when the case is solved!

UESUGI-TAKEDA FORCES

Kenshin

- Oh boy, make sure you won’t overwork yourself by being with this man, being a battle-loving man that he is pt.2

- “How dare you try to even speak with MC; draw your swords. Now.” // “Kenshin-sama, even if I’m used to seeing the deceased, please don’t do that. You’re scaring your own men!”

- He has little to no problem in taking her along to the battlefield, too! One more way to keep her in sight at all times

- Sometimes when you two are drinking and think he had too much you just had to stop him, to his slight annoyance. You have seen many deaths due to alcohol poisoning and definitely wouldn’t want him to be in the list… Bunshin Lord Kenshin appreciates the thought though

- Like Nobunaga, he allows you to do some research on the dead bodies, anything useful for the ongoing war

Shingen

- How can an angel such as you be associated with death and decay? He thinks

- But this daddy needs to accept the fact that you are quite comfortable around such! However once your investigation takes a scary turn expect him to nearby, comforting you with soothing words, or a hug… or eating sweet buns as many as you’d like to calm yourself down

- At first he is reluctant to let you get near the deceased, however whenever he sees your expression light up whenever he makes a cheesy comment (albeit in a rather awkward place) he thought of going along with it

- “Hm, this job of yours is unfitting in every way.” // “Oh yeah? How so?” // “You are brimming with life that I do think you are a goddess who descended upon us men.” // “Ah, here we go again…”

- You have to admit, his presence help you keep your sanity as you used to work alone for long periods of time

Yukimura

- “I thought you might be running away now once you see these.” // “As if they’ll chase me! Unless… are they still alive?” // “Weird woman…”

- This tsun does admire how brave you are after even making such joke

- Along with Sasuke, you three are pretty much effective when doing some investigation at the enemy’s base with you giving them (modern) tips of not getting caught. Unusual hiding spots? Hidden weapons? Suspicious people? All checked and cleared!

- He has been doing that for a long while now, but hearing your strange ideas do sound plausible… especially when ninja friend is highly approving it

- If Sasuke trusts you, he surely starts to trust you (and your skills) too

Sasuke

- Once again, be paired up with Yuki and you three would make a great investigation/espionage team

- When investigating, you and memelord ninja are speaking to each other in partly jargon, partly heavily-memed language

- Possibly having watched and/or read crimes shows or movie you two are getting along so well

- “So here’s our undercover story: husband, wife and husband’s best friend---” // “Wait, do we get cool names too?!” // “Yeah, I’ll get to that part later… or I’ll do it now. Miyako, Tsune and Chozaburo; sounds cool?” // “Noice.”

- As the conversation continues, Yuki is left by himself to wonder how on earth did he get friends like you, shaking his head lightly as your talk no longer makes sense to him

Yoshimoto

- This beautiful mailman sees you one day sketching and as a man of the arts he comes over to look at what you’re drawing

- What he sees is a detailed sketch of a man, possibly a random person. The facial structure, features are all spot on! He is in full admiration mode

- “My, such a lovely piece you are making there. Has someone commissioned you to make him a portrait?” // “Actually Yoshimoto-san, I am making this to be posted around town. A wanted poster of some sorts… he’s a criminal.”

- You explained to him your job as a forensic artist, and he listens to every single word of it. Yoshimoto would find himself asking about your style of sketching as you continue drawing

- When the posters are up he is one of those people who would look at it for a long time; for him it’s not for memorizing the perp’s face, but simply to appreciate the art, fanning himself ever so gracefully

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angst-fairygodmother · 4 years

Text

Light Fingers (The Umbrella Academy)

Diego’s vigilantism brings him repeatedly across the path of a young cat burglar. But as he finds himself developing feelings for the thief, he begins to wonder if there’s more to her than meets the eye, and whether they’re really on opposite sides. And as their relationship deepens, it brings with it a plot involving his estranged adopted father, and threatens to destroy all of them.

CHAPTER 5: REVELATIONS

Word Count: 4471 Pairing: Diego Hargreeves x Reader; teased Eudora Patch x Reader Rating: M Content Warnings: fairly graphic description of injury, blood, language Cross-posted to AO3: here

Previous Chapter: Allegiances || Masterlist

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The first thing you were aware of was the high, tinny ringing. It was quite possibly the most annoying noise you had ever heard, and you were pretty sure it was coming from inside your own head so you couldn’t cover your ears and make it go away. Your eyelids felt heavy, like there was something keeping them from opening, and your mouth felt cottony. Your stomach roiled with nausea. The more of your body returned to your awareness the worse you felt.

“Ugh,” you groaned, voice cracking from disuse. As you forced your eyes to open, thankful that your power even in its most dormant form kept the light from burning them, you registered the meeting of concrete and grey-brown bricks wavering in your vision.

You tried to push yourself to a seated position and immediately felt resistance.

“Woah, hey, you shouldn’t move so fast,” Diego said, pressing lightly on your shoulder to hold you in place.

“Am I in your weird boiler room house?” you slurred. “How did I get here?”

You heard him chuckle. “Well after you passed out, I figured you could use some looking after…and then when you weren’t waking up…I was getting ready to take you to a hospital.”

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d think that sounded like you were worried about me,” you smirked, throwing back his own words at him.

“I was,” he said softly, almost as if he was talking to himself. “Of course I was.”

You found yourself at a loss for words, and not just because your head was still fuzzy and ringing (the feeling was fading some the longer you were awake).

“How are you feeling?”

“Like death slightly warmed over.”

He grimaced.

“Seriously, two questions: how long was I out for, and why does my leg still feel like it’s on fire?”

“It’s been a few hours. That’s why I was…”

“Worried?” you supplied as he floundered.

He nodded sheepishly. “Yeah. As for your leg, you did get shot. It was pretty bad. I stopped the bleeding but the bullet is…still in there.”

“What?!” you jolted up at that, ignoring the pain and spinning sensation, staring at Diego in shock.

“I didn’t want to do anything while you were unconscious! In case you’d prefer an actual doctor do it or something went…wrong…” you registered the tinge of fear in his voice and felt a little less mad at him for leaving a hunk of metal embedded in your calf muscle.

“Well…I’m awake now so if you think you can get it out safely…I trust you to,” you admitted softly, reaching out to rest your hand on top of his where it sat on your bedside.

It was then you registered that not only were you lying in his bed, but he was kneeling awkwardly beside it, and probably had been since before you woke up. Your heart fluttered at the thought that he had been watching over you, taking care of you.

“Are you sure?”

“Yep. Definitely.” You shot him a grin that you hoped looked convincing and not as crazed as you felt in that moment.

He nodded, rising from his crouch and wincing in a way that, once again, suggested he had been in the position for a while, moving about the fairly small room gathering the first aid supplies he’d need. Your eyes traced him as he washed everything down with rubbing alcohol and soap and water, as he pulled on a pair of cheap rubber gloves, and returned to your side.

“You’re going to have to turn for me to get to the wound,” he said, gesturing. “And so I can put down a towel so you don’t bleed everywhere.”

You rolled your eyes, complying with his direction.

“I notice you don’t have any lidocaine or anything there in your little bullet treatment kit…” you observed, biting your lip nervously.

“No, sorry. I could go out and get some, but it’s late so I don’t know what’s open and the sooner we get the bullet out the better.”

“It’s fine,” you said, your voice rising an octave, betraying your fear.

He knelt back down, carefully unwinding the bandage. You couldn’t help but stare down at the inflamed skin, the horribly red, still sluggishly bleeding opening in your leg, stomach turning at the thought that it was an actual hole through skin and muscle, and you were lucky not bone and not anywhere more severe than your lower leg. Diego, noticing your expression, reached over to give your hand a quick squeeze before turning to the work.

You hissed, doing everything in your power not to flinch away as Diego rested his hands on your calf.

“I’m s-sorry,” he murmured, and you frowned, catching the slight stutter in his voice, something which you hadn’t noticed before.

“It’s okay. It’s…are you sure you can do this?”

He took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a moment before he nodded. “Yeah, I mean, I’ve dug bullets out of myself before so…”

“Okay, gonna revisit that later, but for now, I trust you. I still wish we had something to numb the pain first though…”

After that, things became a bit of a blur. You were pretty sure at some point you screamed. It felt like your leg was being rent open by the fiery claws of the devil. You must have passed out again, because the next thing you remembered was someone lightly tapping on your cheek and opening your eyes to see Diego’s face, eyes wide in panic and lip quivering, swimming into focus.

“Fuck me with a cactus, it would have been gentler,” you muttered, wincing. “At least tell me it’s over?”

He smiled, chuckling at your colorful phrasing. “Yeah, bullet’s out, pretty cleanly and I redressed the wound. Now you just need to rest and recover and keep it clean so it doesn’t get infected.”

“Well, thank you then, Doctor Hargreeves. I guess I owe you one, and should get out of your hair.” You shifted like you were going to try to get to your feet and he immediately reached out to stop you.

“You’re not…bothering me. And I’d rather know you were okay. Besides, there’s no way you can walk on that yet. Just…get some sleep.”

“You look almost as exhausted as I feel, and there’s not exactly another bed around…” you pointed out, watching him blush and look away with a slight flush of your own.

“I’ll sleep on the floor. It’s fine.”

“Diego…” you started to protest, but were cut off by a rapid knocking sound.

“Diego, you can’t keep avoiding me,” Patch called, from the other side of the boiler room door. “I know you were at the bank robbery so I need a statement, before someone else issues a warrant.”

“Really?” you groaned. “Terrible timing, Officer.”

“Relax, Eudora is…was…she’s fine. You’ll be fine,” Diego mumbled half-heartedly, moving to open the door and let her in.

You glared at his back as he did so, annoyed that he had managed to avoid the conversation entirely, and once again you two had danced, just out of each other’s reach. You shifted hastily and tugged at the quilt at the end of the bed to try and hide your injury without causing too much pain. Still, you whimpered softly, catching both their attention as she entered the little room.

“Y/N?! What the hell happened?” she said, rushing over to you.

“Heeey, Dora. Oh this?” you gestured down to your leg and the small spot of red seeping through the gauze. “Bank robbers. No respect,” you said with a forced chuckle and a shake of your head. You felt your head swim a little at the movement and began to regret expending the energy so quickly after the secondary trauma of Diego’s impromptu surgery. “Luckily it was just a little bullet and Diego here doesn’t make a bad triage nurse.”

“Wait you two know each other?” he asked, his tone maybe as much frightened as confused.

“While you were off the grid, we hung out. Dora’s great,” you said, flashing her a wink over his shoulder and giggling at his stunned expression, feeling strangely giddy.

“Y/N,” she sighed. “I think you need a hospital, not a little first aid from this idiot.”

“Nah, I’m fine. Why do you say that?”

“You just ‘winked’ with both eyes. And you look a little green around the gills.”

“Still knew I was winking though,” you smirked before frowning in puzzlement. “But I don’t have gills…”

You didn’t catch her response, or Diego’s as the darkness rushed back in to claim you and you slumped back into his bed.

Patch was headed for the payphone in the hall, probably to call an ambulance, while Diego hesitated, torn between stopping her and making sure Y/N was alright.

“Eudora, don’t,” he finally managed to get out. “She won’t appreciate it.”

“She won’t appreciate anything if she dies of blood loss,” Patch shot back, glaring at him. “Besides it’s just a hospital, what’s the problem?”

He sighed. None of this was his to tell. Y/N might never forgive him. But still, he had to try and make Eudora understand. He gestured for her to come sit beside him.

“Look. It’s not a serious wound. I’m pretty sure her exhaustion and slipping in and out of consciousness is from stress. I don’t think she’s ever…done something like that before.”

“Like what, Diego? Been in a bank robbery?”

“No,” he shook his head and his voice was soft as he continued, “stopped one.”

“I don’t understand.” Patch was frowning, that confused little furrow forming between her brows which Diego (and you) secretly found cute.

“You remember how I told you about my siblings and me?”

“Yeah your Umbrella School or whatever…”

“Academy.” He frowned at how quickly the correction, almost a defense, jumped out.

She rolled her eyes.

“Anyway, there were more kids that my father couldn’t get.”

“Are you saying Y/N has superpowers like you do?”

“Not just like mine but…yeah. She can control light or something. She had a more scientific explanation.” He shrugged.

“So the flares that stunned the robbers, and several hostages…?” There was something like awe on Patch’s face.

“Were her. When they turned a gun on that kid…she just reacted.”

“Shit.” Patch rocked back on her heels, pinching the bridge of her nose the way she always did when she was stressed, and Diego knew at least part of her was trying to figure out how that was going to screw with the reports, or if she was just going to conveniently leave it out. “But what does this have to do with taking her to the hospital?”

“She’s not…trusting doctors and hospitals is hard when you’ve got a big secret like this, especially when it contributes to the problem you need treated. Plus she’s stubborn; she won’t like being forced to accept help.”

She bit her lip. “I don’t like this at all. But if you’re sure…?”

He met her eye sincerely. “I am.”

She watched as Diego returned to his ministrations, checking your pulse and adjusting the bandages, which you had managed to rumple in your shifting about, such that the long gauze strips no longer fully covered the wound.

“You’re pretty good at that,” Patch mused. “And it’s obvious that you care a lot about Y/N.”

“You’re one to talk. You never let me call you ‘Dora.’”

She blushed, looking away. “It’s not like that. Not… really. Nothing like what’s between you and her.”

“There’s nothing…we’re n-not…” Diego suddenly found himself unable to look at either woman.

He had been in love with Eudora, once, and still felt strongly for her, even if the romantic connection between them had been severed and probably wouldn’t ever come back together. But there was something about Y/N that just felt right. She made him feel seen and understood and like he didn’t need to still be ‘Number Two of The Umbrella Academy,’ he could just be Diego. She made him smile, more freely than he could remember doing in years. He’d missed her terribly while he was away, while they weren’t speaking to one another, like there had been a piece of him missing. When he’d seen her collapse, he had felt like his heart stopped. But she also scared him. They were so different, so incompatible on paper. And he thought that having her just to lose her might actually kill him, so maybe it was better not to go there at all.

“Relax, Diego,” Patch said with a slight laugh, pulling his attention back to the room and her. “It wasn’t an accusation. I’m happy for you. And I like Y/N. She’ll keep you on your toes.”

He opened his mouth to deny once again that there was anything going on between the two of you, to assure her, but she shook her head and rolled her eyes affectionately. Still he blundered onward, changing tactics slightly but still determined to deny what he knew was real, what Patch could see with her own two eyes.

“She probably doesn’t even—“

Patch held up a hand to cut him off again. “Don’t give me that. Don’t use the excuse of not knowing what you could easily find out.”

“It’s not that simple, Eudora,” he sighed.

“Nothing about love ever is.” She stood up, brushing non-existent dirt off her pant legs. “I need to get back to work, but I hope you give what I said some thought at least. For both of your sakes.”

‘Love.’ The word echoed through Diego’s mind, but not in a way that felt intimidating or worrying. It felt more like suddenly having a name for the feeling he knew was there, like hearing someone else say it made it real. But that didn’t mean he wanted to say it out loud. Or did he?

The world swam slowly into existence for a third time, and you groaned, sick of the feeling as much as you were suffering any ill effects. Cautiously, you propped yourself up on your elbows, and the movement caught Diego’s attention. Almost immediately, he was up out of the chair he’d been sitting in and crouched by your side.

“How long was I out for?” you asked, hesitantly, ignoring the way your heart fluttered at his closeness and how quickly he’d jumped to your side.

“Do you mean since Patch made you swoon or in general?” he teased, smiling.

You rolled your eyes. “She did not make me swoon. Although if anyone’s swoon-worthy…but no, I mean how long have I been in the Bat Cave, total?”

“You’ve been in and out for…two days or so.”

“Two…shit!” you bolted upright, trying to get to your feet despite Diego fighting you on it. “I need to go, and hope I haven’t been fired yet.”

“You need to rest! And why does it matter to you so much if you lose your job?”

“What do you mean why does it matter? I need that job. You know for rent, and food, and generally being able to survive.”

He frowned, clearly confused. “I don’t understand.”

“That’s a reoccurring thing for you it seems. What exactly has you confused this time Hargreeves?”

“You’re a thief. You’ve stolen plenty. Why does a dead end job matter to you?”

“Are you serious?”

“Why wouldn’t I be? I’ve tried to figure it out: why you work at the diner, why you’re always wearing the same faded sweatshirt and jeans when you’re not working. You’ve got all that money…”

“Is my sense of fashion actually being judged by a man who wears leather like it’s a uniform and not just an uncomfortable invitation to awkward sweat?”

“It is a uniform. And you’re avoiding the question.”

You rolled your eyes. “Self-imposed means it’s not a uniform. Just a…fashion?...choice.” You cocked your head to one side and intentionally exaggerated the question in your tone, making it clear to him what you thought of his pick of attire. He certainly wasn’t wearing it for comfort.

“You’re really going to insult me after I saved your life?”

“You really think I steal for myself?”

“Who else would you be stealing for?”

“Saving lives isn’t always just stabbing and punching bad guys.” Your eyes flickered away from his face, fixing on some invisible point over his shoulder.

“What?”

You shrugged. “I support myself with a day job and then at night, I take from rich assholes who really don’t need it, or deserve to hurt, and I give it to people that need.”

He fell silent, frowning and avoiding eye contact.

“Well, you don’t have to worry,” he said eventually, pointedly ignoring your revelation. “Patch called in sick for you.”

“A police officer calling me in sick? Great now they’re definitely going to think I’m a criminal and fire me.”

“You are a criminal.”

You glared at him, wishing you had something to throw, especially when your reaction made him chuckle.

“She told them you were a witness and were in protective custody. You should be good for a week.”

“So dramatic.” You rolled your eyes. “Thanks, I guess.”

“It was…her idea…” for some reason he wouldn’t meet your eyes again, and you were pretty sure he was lying to you.

“I don’t just mean the work thing,” you said, fiddling with your fingers. “You didn’t have to help me out. You could have left me in the bank, or dumped me on the EMTs.”

He shifted, sitting awkwardly on the edge of the mattress and twisting to face you, instead of kneeling beside you. Hesitantly, he reached out catching an errant strand of your hair between his fingers and twirling it distractingly. Only a stubbornness warring with yourself (and maybe a fear that if you moved too quickly you would pass out again) kept you from launching yourself forward to press your lips to his. You hated how his proximity and the subtle scent of him made your heart race, how he made you feel weak and dizzy in a way that was entirely separate from the blood loss.

As you sat there, not quite locking eyes, each watching each other, it dawned on you that you might actually love him. Strangely, it sent a sensation of calm flooding over you. It just made sense, so there was no point in fighting it, just deciding what to do with it.

“I saw your eyes when you were talking about what you thought they might do if someone found out you had powers,” he explained finally, reluctantly letting his hand drop back to his side. “I didn’t want to be the reason you were that scared.”

“Oh.” The word felt small and inadequate.

You reached out hesitantly, to rest your hand on his where it sat between you. He turned his up so that your palms were touching and laced his fingers through yours. You both sat there staring at your joined hands, each trying to figure out what it meant to yourselves and to each other.

You weren’t sure how long you sat there in the heavy, waiting silence. Finally Diego cleared his throat and pulled away, standing up.

“Are you hungry? I’m going to go out and get you some food, so you can get your strength back up,” he said awkwardly. “You should get some more rest.”

“Right, sure,” you frowned, biting back the questions dancing on your tongue. “Thanks…”

The next few days passed much the same way, with you trying to rest and recover, and Diego doing what he could to help you, including helping you change your bandages and giving you a literal hand when you started testing your weight on it finally. The thread of tension running between you was pulled taut and you waited for it to snap. Until, finally you couldn’t take it anymore.”

“Diego,” you started as you stood next to him, his forearm in a vice grip as you wobbled on your right foot and haltingly placed your left one on the cold concrete.

“Don’t start thanking me again, Y/N,” he said, shaking his head ruefully. “I keep telling you it’s no big deal.”

“Diligently nursing me back to health from a gunshot wound is no big deal?” you asked with a raised eyebrow and a demanding sharpness to your tone.

“No. It lets me know you’re okay.” He tried to shrug without moving the arm you were using for balance, resulting in a very awkward gesture and you giggled at it. “I’d do the same for anyone I cared so much about.”

You hobbled yourself around to be facing him, face blushing hotly. “You care about me?”

“O-o-of…c-c-c…” he gaped and floundered and the stutter that you had quickly come to recognize as a sign of his nervousness or uncertainty in himself was sharp.

“Relax, Diego. I care about you to, I just…it’s nice to hear it confirmed that the feeling’s mutual,” you smiled and gave a little shrug.

He stared at you, eyes roving your face as if searching for something. Whatever it was, he must have found it, because the next thing you knew, his free hand was cupping your jaw, thumb trailing across your cheek. And then his lips were on yours and the time for thinking or knowing was past you.

Your grip tightened further on his arm and the other hand curled around his shoulders, dragging yourself closer as his tongue parted your lips in askance, diving in to tangle with yours when you opened so willingly in answer, a moan escaping you only to be swallowed in his kiss. His arm slipped your grip to wrap around your waist as he felt you buckle, whether under the strain on your leg or the intensity of the kiss was uncertain and irrelevant to you both. Slowly, he backed up toward the threadbare chair in the corner of the room, dropping back into it and pulling you down onto his lap. You tangled your hands into his close-cropped hair, carding and tugging gently at it, making him groan, and his hands ran ticklishly up and down your sides.

Reluctantly, you pulled back, panting for air through your kiss-bruised lips.

“What the fuck was that?” you asked, eyebrow raised and staring down at him.

“I think I’ve wanted to do that for six months now,” he murmured in response, gaze adoring as he met your eyes.

“I’ve certainly been waiting for you to. Maybe I should get shot more often.”

“Don’t even joke…”

“So what changed? Was it just about admitting that I cared too?”

“Yeah, I guess. Or, actually, I think it was something Eudora said when she was here. Something she made me see…I don’t know…” he shifted uncomfortably as if trying to get away from your vision and his voice had just enough of a hitch that you knew that his stutter would come out soon if you kept pushing.

So instead, you gently brushed your fingers along his jaw to turn his head back to you.

“Don’t worry about it, you don’t have to explain…I just…I’m glad we finally got here. Now kiss me again.”

He smirked, arms curling around your back to draw you downward. “If you insist.”

A few hours later, you both sat at his little table, picking at your takeout.

“So, you have to get back to work soon…” he started awkwardly.

“Yep. I mean, it was a nice week hiding out in the Bat Cave, but I knew I’d to get back to reality eventually.”

“What will you do about, you know, the other thing?”

“Why? So you know when to go back to failing to catch me?” you teased, cocking you head at him with a smirk.

“No. I just know you could be using your powers differently, so I thought…maybe after everything you might have changed your mind on it.”

You growled in frustration, dropping the cheap plastic fork you had been using to nose the vegetables around in your lo mein. “Not this again, Diego.”

“I’m just saying…”

“Well I really wish you wouldn’t. You can’t say you care about me and expect me to believe that, no matter how sweet you are, when you turn around and try to change me with every second breath.” You heard your voice crack, and fought back the accompanying tears of anger. You had thought, no hoped, that now that your feelings were out in the open, he would be more accepting.

“I’m not trying to change you! I just saw what you did at the bank—“

“What? Nearly kill myself? I spent two days slipping in and out of consciousness! I’m going to probably be limping for weeks. I am NEVER doing that again.”

“You can take direct action to save lives! Isn’t that worth a little risk?”

“Why don’t you ask your brother that?” You instantly regretted the words as they slipped off your tongue.

Immediately, it was like sheet-metal shutters slammed shut behind his eyes, those warm chocolate eyes that you loved so much now gone and stony.

“Shit. No, Diego, I…I didn’t mean that…or I kind of did, but I had no right…”

His jaw twitched but he didn’t speak.

“Fuck. I fucked everything up already. Shit. Please say something? Even if you want to tell me off, which I totally deserve…please?”

“We need to change the bandages on your leg.” His voice was flat. You had heard security alarms with more emotion.

“Oh. Right.” You sighed, twisting awkwardly to pull yourself out from under the table and give him access to the wound.

“Then I think you should go.”

You were silent for a moment, watching him closely as he rounded the table and carefully unwound the gauze from your leg.

“No,” you said softly. “I don’t think I should.”

He turned his head up to look at you, mouth agape.

“We keep doing this Diego. Every time there’s something between us, we end up snapping at each other and saying something that hurts the other person and shutting each other out. And I don’t want to do that again. I really like you, and I trust you and I want to be around you, like all the time, and that’s all new and confusing and…terrifying. But I don’t want to lose it.”

“What are you saying?”

“That we should, maybe, talk this out like adults this time?” you smiled sheepishly, hesitantly.

Silence rang over the room, but you felt gentle hands on your leg as he continued to inspect how your leg was healing.

“You’re…right. We should…talk,” he said finally, and you felt the relief settle over your body, tension dropping away.

“Glad you agree,” you said with a slight smile.

#this chapter really got away from me #and I already know the next one is going to too #but it was a lot of conversations that needed to happen #with wound-tending and other related bullshit to interconnect it all #I know nothing about injuries so...sorry?#Light Fingers #Diego Hargreeves x Reader #The Umbrella Academy fic #pre-canon #still haven't decided how far I want to take this Eudora x reader thing #I guess we'll all find out together

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carrera-ffxiv · 3 years

Text

Looking for a Wolff amongst the Wolves

Ember walked into the halls, shoulders back, head held up high as one of her status would demand. “Where is Hadriel Isenhart?” she shot the doorman a glare- she wasn’t of an imposing stature but still, her gaze would pierce through. The old gentleman laughed gently while perusing today’s newspaper, “Downstairs. Do mind your manners though. He doesn’t take kindly to brazen attitudes.” At that moment, an odd sensation struck her. She felt as if something was off and she couldn’t quite put her finger on it. “Thanks, old man.”

She wandered down some steps. The mansion looked elegant from the outside and on the ground floor, but as she entered the basement it took a twisted turn for the worse. Pipes and rusted grates gave her a very narrow path to follow. She turned one final corner and the difference was jarring; beautiful black marble flooring and expensive furnishings to match- the basement gave way to a wondrous haven reserved only for the elite amongst the elite. Even her privileged self recognized that this was no layman’s territory. Again, that odd feeling struck her.

Staff seemed to head about their work at their different stations, one seemed to be doling out missions and payment, the others tending to gear or bartering items; but the back half of the area seemed to be reserved for drinking and dining. A comely Miqo’te woman in a maid’s dress was tending to a Doman man in a suit. “That must be him…” she muttered to herself, steeling her resolve as she stepped forward. As she grew closer she would notice the scars along his face and she paused- everyone else here had given her at least one glance at a brief appraisal, this man hadn’t bothered to even look her way as she stood right next to him.

“Hadriel Isenhart?” She asked, demanding a response. The request fell upon deaf ears while he took a sip from his drink, chuckling at whatever the server had whispered unto him.

She continued, “Hadriel? I’m Ember Brightburn and I’m here looking for someone you employ. A recent investigation by my associates has concluded that Nijah Wolff works for you. And she’s involved in a murder in Hingas-”

“Never heard of her.” he spoke dryly before wetting his lips with his glass of whiskey. He went on to continue disregarding her presence, having a conversation with the bartender.

“I come from the Brightburn Aetheric Arms, Ammunition, and Equipment company, and I assure you, our ammunition sold to Ms. Wolff was found at the scene of a crime. Our company simply cannot be associated with people who-”

“And what did you come here for? Young lady. Did you come here to play detective? How did you think this would play out? I would give you your suspect? Then what? What was your plan? Are you going to arrest her and drag her off?” he scoffed, “Think about your actions a little bit more next time before you come in here. Get out, and have a nice day, Miss Brightburn.” he waved her off.

“I won’t be ignored!” she slammed her hand on the table. “Ah-” she sounded out, her eyes scanning the room. An odd silence overcame her. That feeling that kept creeping up in the back of her neck- she had finally figured it out.

The server, the merchants, the random staff all stopped what they were doing to watch her, pointedly. Not in shock, or awe, or some sort of discomfort- no, they all seemed very comfortable in their subtle movement as each of them reached quietly to one thing or another: an unseen blade, a sharpened quill, an elegant letter-opener, or one of countless innocuous items all ready to plunge violently into her person. The anxiety pierced her from all directions, horridly shaking her perception while unhinging her confidence.

“Sit down.” the man offered her. What seemed like a brief moment flew by as her mind went a million malms a minute and his voice rang again. “Sit down.” It would seem like a simple request or suggestion from anyone else, but from this man- it was different. It was a command. It was an inescapable edict. It was a death sentence if one were to ignore his kind gesture.

She had almost forgotten to breathe and took in an uneasy, uneven, and sharp breath. She felt herself shaken to her very core, “...Okay.” she spoke meekly, rocking almost imperceptibly. Her sassy attitude and overt certainty took second-chair to his presence. She had to concentrate on her breathing to maintain balance. Eyes welled slightly as she breathed in and out sharply. She found it difficult to speak in a single stream of consciousness, “Okay… I just wanted to meet… her... she buys our ammunition… and I don’t want our casings to be associated with...”

“... And you thought it wise to track her down, here?” he waved everyone off dismissively and life returned to the establishment. Everyone went about their business as normal, hustling and bustling; background noise filled the place once more, “You realize, if I did know this woman, I’d tell you that she’s not someone to be treated in a frivolous manner. She would sooner pick you up and drop you on your little dainty head than put up with your demanding, questioning attitude. You are quite lucky I’ve grown to be a patient man over the years.”

She had to reassess everything she knew upon meeting this man, and a short few moments had redefined her world. There was a sudden stillness to her expression as her jaw tightened “...Mister ...I just wanted to impress ...that we are not a company to …to-” she found herself at a loss of words at the overwhelming pressure.

“To be trifled with?” Hadriel gave her a lifeline as he spoke. “No, neither are we and I appreciate your company’s contribution to our bottom-line. Several of our associates prefer Brightburn AAA&E. But how you present yourself right now… you have to remember; you’re representing a business.” He watched her meticulously as he took another sip from his whiskey. “So, take that into consideration and choose your next words carefully as you speak.”

It was a strange sensation. She felt every word he uttered was a threat, yet at the same time she felt earnest concern from his advice. She nodded furtively while her shoulders dropped.

“I… I know Nijah… Or at least, I knew her. I just wanted to find her.” she admitted, feeling oddly vulnerable, her chest caving slightly.

“Okay, now we’re getting somewhere. You want to find someone ...and that led you here. Who conducted this supposed investigation? Is she a person of interest to you, or to the people investigating this? What’s your role in all of this?” he barraged her with a series of observations and questions. How quickly she shifted rolls from interrogator to interviewee. She didn’t like these turn of events at all; quickly, idle threats churned in her mind but she managed to stay them once it hit the filter between her brain and mouth.

“I ...uhm, it was an internal investigation by our company… We record the sales of lot numbers on the shell casings; the Sekiseigumi had already dismissed the case as… internal gang violence...”

“Good, good.” he swirled the glass around and took a sip. “That said, I think inserting yourself into a criminal investigation is a very bad idea. Could get caught up with the wrong people. I also think it is ill-advised to track sales and lot numbers. Might discourage your clientele if that information were to unfortunately leak out.”

“... it’s… something we do internally to cover us if something bad happens… we don’t usually use it.”

“But you did this time?” he set his glass back down on the table.

She seemed defeated and worn, “...I-I just wanted to see her. That’s all. I’m sorry to have intruded.” Her mind wandered; what could Nijah be doing? Who or what was she involved with now? This spelled nothing but trouble. Reaching out to her felt more daunting than ever. Now, more than anything, she simply wanted to get away from this place.

“So then, this was a personal visit. Perhaps a missive might have served you better. You’re welcome to stay to discuss business, or if you’re looking to make some coin. Otherwise, I suggest you visit another day. Perhaps then, you might find what you’re looking for. A little word of unsolicited advice for next time: honesty and humility go a long way, I highly recommend you start with both.”

Mentions: @nijah-wolff-xiv

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megbox · 3 years

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2020 Year in Review

Previous Posts: (2019) (2018) (2017) (2016) (2015) (2014) (2013) (2012) (2011)

2020 is a weird year because as the world goes through something collectively extremely traumatic and that is radically changing the structure of our lives, our workplaces, the way we connect socially, our mental health… our response to disease…. SO MUCH ABOUT THE WORLD…. And yet the day-to-day of living in a pandemic is so… mundane. I am privileged enough to have that opinion. I have stayed securely employed and it is privilege for my main reaction to something as intense as this pandemic to be boredom. But really, 2020 was a year of absences. It was a year spent largely alone, in my own company. It was a year that forced me to rest. It was a year that made me feel so terribly lonely but also forced me to get acquainted with myself and enjoy my own company in a new way. And it was a year of running.

I would also like to thank Connor for making this post happen by reminding me to do it and not to break tradition.

January & February

I am combining these months because they were not altogether all that memorable. My resolutions, as I noted on Twitter on January 2, were to 1) Keep running and 2) Learn how to make fresh pasta dough. I can safely say – mission accomplished on both fronts.

On January 14, I had the privilege of presenting a suicide intervention lecture to students at the medical school where my brother goes. By that time, I’d done a million of these presentations so nerves aren’t really a factor (imagine that! Me, no longer remotely afraid of public speaking…), but this one meant a little extra to me. My brother is so highly accomplished, and I am so proud of him, and I enjoyed having an opportunity to show him what I do and make him proud of me. I wore my favourite dress and did my hair all nice and he described it later as “exceptional.” It was a really, really good feeling. The first weekend of February, Ali and I had planned to go to Jasper. We wanted to go for a hike or two, and get super stoned and go to the planetarium. A huge blizzard hit Alberta just before we were supposed to leave, so we ended up having a staycation here in Calgary. We rented a hotel room, went swimming, drank wine, went to Japanese Village, had drinks in the lounge and then later to a punk rock band roulette night at the Palomino and finally crawled into our giant hotel bed and fell asleep to Remember the Titans… of all movies. It was the kind of night where you simultaneously feel 18 and 35 years old.

March

March was when the pandemic really started to become real. I don’t know exactly why, but I did not take the threat of coronavirus very seriously until the last minute. My coworkers would whisper about it in the hallways and I just rolled my eyes. But then, people started deciding they would work from home, the number of us in the office dwindled. The vibe was bad. Nobody could really focus. They held meetings at 8am and 4pm every day just for COVID-19 updates and we all waited with bated breath for them to finally tell us to go home and not come back. I really feel like I didn’t acknowledge the true implications of this virus until we got the official work from home order, and I had to tell my boss, my laptop at home is too old to run this software, I need a work tablet. My first official work from home day was March 23, 2020. I don’t remember much about that time except that the general sense of panic and anxiety made my job a lot busier, and it is hard to do a job like mine from home because it is hard to counsel or reassure clients through anxieties that are hitting you just as hard. I coped with wine, a lot of running, and listening to Ben Gibbard’s afternoon live streams where he would play acoustic versions of Death Cab songs and other covers. He played New Slang by the Shins one night and I burst into tears. I also coped with teaching myself how to make fresh pasta dough, and enjoying what was, at that point in the pandemic, the novelty and fun of Zoom.

April

In the absence of being able to have a party for my birthday, I decided to be obnoxious and do a “challenge” on my Instagram story. I asked my friends to record a distance run and/or walked and send it to me as a birthday present. My actual birthday ended up being a cold and windy and pretty miserable day. I ran 12km myself, came back home and watched both Magic Mike and Magic Mike XXL, and then went to my parents’ to celebrate both Scott and I’s birthdays with our family. My friends dropped off presents to my door and drove past my house and honked and I felt very loved and appreciated. I drank a lot of Prosecco with my brother and we listened to Kacey Musgraves.

It was also in April that I become “acquainted” with my neighborhood running nemesis. I put acquainted in apostrophes because I have never actually spoken to him. On one fateful run in April, I happened to catch up to him on my regular route. This was at the height of the COVID fear and so, while I would usually just pass someone on the sidewalk, I went out into the street. He saw me out of the corner of his eye and SPED UP. WHICH IS SUCH BAD RUNNER ETIQUETTE LIKE DUDE I’M IN THE ROAD LET ME PASS YOU. And then we ended up in this like, all-out 100m-finals-at-the-motherfucking-Olympics sprint challenge when all I was trying to do was go for a leisurely training run. And then I finally passed him, turned a corner and had to like collapse on to my hands and knees to catch my breath. Since then, I see this man running all the time. Sometimes while I am also running, sometimes from my car when I am driving through my neighborhood. He’s like… 16. And we are very competitive with one another. I hope to one day actually say hello to him. I both hate that guy and have to thank him for the motivation.

I ran my first half marathon on April 13, 2020. I was very hungover because I had stayed up quite late with someone on Zoom the night before on a virtual “first date” that had gone much better than anticipated. I don’t know why but I woke up the next morning in such a good mood that I decided I would go for a long, slow run. I got to 18km and figured, what’s 3.1 more? And so, I did it. The first thing I did upon finishing was call my mom. The second thing I did was contemplate calling an Uber to drive me the 2km left to my house. The other notable thing in April is that Maddy moved back from Australia, begrudgingly and a LOT earlier than planned, because of COVID.

May

May was kind of a blur. It was the first month of the Great Virtual Race Across Tennessee, which I signed up for while coming off of the high of actually running a half marathon all by myself. The GVRAT was fucking awesome. It was created by Lazarus Lake, of Barkley Marathons fame. The ask is to run 1022.68km between May 1 and August 31, an average of about 8.3km per day. Well, you could run, walk, or hike. This is the actual distance it would take you to cover the state of Tennessee. Myself and about 20,000 other weirdos from around the world signed up for this challenge. I figured I would never get a chance to run in a Lazarus Lake race for real, and being home all the time opened up a lot more opportunity for training. It was one of the very best things I did for myself in 2020. So May involved a lot of running, because I was fresh and naïve and fully intended to be ahead of the curve. I was running about 10-12 per day, sometimes more, and not taking any rest days.

In between these runs, I spent a lot of time going on long, ambling quarantine walks with Maddy. We would either go for a long walk or she would come over and we would get absolutely hammered in my backyard playing beer pong just to pass the time. We would send snapchats to our exes and make TikToks like 18 year olds. I know we never really said it out loud but having eachother during this time made these months bearable. We were lamenting the loss of a summer, and Maddy’s time in Australia, and all of the expectations we had for ourselves. We were watching our friends in relationships move in together or get closer due to the quarantine. We needed companionship, and stupid things to laugh about, and love, and distraction. And I can genuinely say I would not have gotten through this quarantine period if it weren’t for the nights I spent shooting Pink Whitney and dancing to Party in the USA in my living room with her.

May 13th was my one year anniversary of working at the university. It felt good to have accomplished so many things in that time, and have moved up already in my job, and to have a full-time, permanent contract.

And May 16th was when I ran my second half-marathon as part of a virtual challenge put on by a friend of a friend. My parents came and sat in lawn chairs in the park while I did loops. They cheered me on and filled my water bottle for me when I ran out. They’re my number one supporters and I love having a family that does that kind of shit for me in the face of something arbitrary like a virtual half marathon challenge. I knocked 7 minutes (!) off my original time. Amazing what not being hungover can do for your fitness levels.

June

I don’t remember many important things about June, other than Maddy moving to Banff. It was depressing but I was also happy for her and happy to have an excuse to go out there and visit. I went the very first weekend after she moved. Halfway through June I seriously contemplated quitting the GVRAT. My shins were bruised, I was dreading every single run, and I could not fathom doing it for 2.5 more months. I was dragging behind in the standings and losing my motivation.

I spent a lot of time with friends reading in parks. Sometimes, often, with wine. I met a stranger in Canmore Park and ended up kissing him. He was lovely.

Ali and I had one really good day in June where we went to the Farmer’s Market and then came back to her place and watched Ru Paul’s drag race for like eight straight hours. It was one of those days where we hadn’t seen each other in so long and you just feel totally high off of friendship and absolutely everything is funny and you just can’t stop laughing. I vividly remember it as one of the best days of the year.

July

Again, July kind of passed in a blur. I did a lot of hiking, and a lot of running… keeping up with the GVRAT. I hiked Picklejar Lakes, Castle Mountain, Little Beehive Lookout.

I went to Banff for a weekend to hang out with Maddy. We had a predictably wild weekend with her roommates and friends. We had dinner at Chili’s (hell yeah) and then went to High Rollers for beers and bowling. The “thing to do” at that point for all of these Banff people was to meet at the “rec grounds” aka public firepits and drink. The police would generally leave you alone so long as you weren’t being rowdy. I sat next to an Australian named Josh at a picnic table and later took him back to my hotel room and he gave me the world’s most unbelievable obvious hickey. Maddy and I sweat out the tequila shots the next day with a long ass hike, and then had a nap before her brother came and took us climbing at the Sunshine slabs – an activity I was not very good at but I wanted to be good at. It was the kind of weekend where you feel like, okay, I definitely indulged my wild side. And you drive home just like totally exhausted but smiling. I sent Maddy’s brother a voice note on my way into town thanking him for taking us climbing and saying it was nice to see him.

August

Okay – August was actually really eventful. Like most of the year’s events happened in August, honestly. A lot of running and hiking. I did Ha Ling Peak for the first time, and we did a 30km hike to Aylmer Pass one day that was a fricken GRIND. I spent the long weekend in Saskatchewan. We went to a cidery, and I ran laps around my Dodo’s acreage, and then we got to visit Wakaw Lake and reunite with our old next-door neighbours. We took the boat out and went tubing and lit fireworks and had an amazing dinner and honestly it was like reliving my childhood in the best, best, best way. I fell asleep on the car ride home.

I went camping with Ali in Sylvan Lake. We got ice cream and cooked fish tacos over the campfire. She told me that Cody had a date planned for the day they took possession of their house, that she wondered if he might ask her to marry him but didn’t want to get her hopes up in case it didn’t happen and ruin what otherwise was supposed to be a celebratory day. Spoiler – he did ask her to marry him  I was running when she called me. I was listening to Epsilon by Kygo, and now when I hear that song I always think of them. I stopped my watch and just openly bawled on the street out of happiness for them.

Steven successfully defended his master’s thesis. We went camping in Waterton to celebrate with Matt, Kennedy, Regan, Scott, and Rie. They brought cake. We did a sunrise hike. I slept in the back of my Ford Escape.

On August 27, Ollie passed away. It was both expected and unexpected. He had been having some issues with seizures. The vet didn’t think it was anything to be too concerned about, he was old and it wasn’t uncommon for them to happen. It happened suddenly. I had a terrible sleep that night, and woke up in a cold sweat somewhere between 3 and 4 am. In the morning, my mom called me and told me the news. He had a giant seizure in the night and was crying and yelping. They woke up and took him to the emergency vet, they made the executive call to put him down to prevent any further suffering. He died right around the time I woke up in the middle of the night. I like to think that was his way of saying goodbye, maybe. I cried all day. Well, let’s be honest, I cried all week. I burst into tears at the mere thought of him. He was such a good and lovely dog. He was so loved by us. He had a good life. It is always sad when we lose pets so early. They bring so much joy to our lives, and still when I go to my parents’ place the first thing I want to do is call for him or pet him. I hope he is running around in whatever the pet afterlife is. I miss him.

And on August 31, I ran my last kilometre of the GVRAT. I finished with 733.78 run, 83.18 hiked, and 205.09 walked.

September

September was a nice break from running. I got to start coming to campus one day a week, on Thursdays, which was good for my mental health and work productivity. I got to spend September long in Vernon with Maeghan and Madison at Michael’s family’s cabin. They took us boating and made us meals and didn’t judge us for drinking margaritas with Michael’s sister literally all day. It was the best. It was the epitome of every summer weekend you dream about. I was so happy I got to go.

I met a boy in September. It’s always September, isn’t it? It feels weird to write about him. Like, that makes him significant. But. He is significant. And I met him in September. And it was unexpected. Last minute. And essentially not a day has gone by since that day in September that I have not thought about him.

I also joined a Calgary Sport and Social Club team with my friends for softball and it started in September. We played two games and then I tore my hamstring running from second to third base. I tore… my hamstring…. Running like 30 metres…. After a summer of literally running 10+ km every day. I… it was the worst day ever. Softball itself was amazing and so fun even though I really do suck at the sport but highly recommend Rec League C-level beer league softball with all of your best friends. There’s just no way that isn’t fun.

October

A lot of pouting about my hamstring, I went to two physio sessions and then decided to just start running again. I’m bad. I’m a bad example. Don’t do what I do… but also…. It worked.

I went to Victoria to visit Sydney over the Thanksgiving weekend. We went to a Thanskgiving potluck party at my old coworker’s place. It was a nice experience to be the new people at a party, to have a room full of new people to meet and who ask you questions about your life. We got really drunk and they tried setting Sydney up with one of their roommate’s brothers, and gave us lipstick to try, and poured us tequila shots. We had such an amazing meal. It was honestly so fun. We laughed in the cab the whole way back about how we were going to need to debrief that evening HARD the next morning. We watched a lot of All Gas No Brakes, and went for dinner and brunch and I limped up Mount Doug with my hamstring. It was a very very chill weekend, like we spent a lot of time just lounging at Sydney’s apartment and doing nothing. Because that is the kind of friends we are. It was so relaxing and lovely. I was sad to leave.

Karla, my roommate, left for New York at the end of October. Her aunt was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, and she and her mom made the executive move to go there to basically be with her for the end of her life. She wasn’t going to be back until December. I was happy, because it’s nice to have a place to myself, but also sad because Karla is lovely and I knew it was going to be a stressful situation for her.

November / December

I am combining these two months because they have also been largely uneventful. In fact… I don’t know if I could really tell you anything significant that happened. We’ve been in a lockdown. I’ve spent my time playing piano, watching Netflix, listening to podcasts, basically doing all of the things I usually do when I’m bored. Lots of Among Us. Lots of outdoor things… skating… more running. We’ve been in a lockdown since early December. Time has dragged on since then. I spent Christmas with my parents. Scott and Rie stayed isolated, because Scott is in and out of the hospital for school. My mom and I watched shitty Christmas Hallmark movies and made fun of the guys who star in them. We drank a LOT on Christmas Eve and both spent Christmas with a wicked hangover. My dad and I ate edibles and I was launched into the stratosphere. I spent New Year’s Eve with Boy from September. We played beer pong, and card games, and he tried to use a coat hangover to pick the lock on the mysterious room that my landlord keeps locked. We spent most of the night kissing, honestly. I was happy to spend the last moments of the year with him.

2021:

Honestly... at this point... who really knows?

#year in review #text #personal #2020

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ranma-rewatch · 3 years

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Episode 17: I Love You, Ranma! Please Don’t Say Goodbye

Howdy dowdy, everyone! We are getting so close! So close to finishing the first season of Ranma 1/2! Last episode ended with Akane still having no clue who Ranma is, so this time they’ll resolve that? I think? I am fairly sure she remembered him throughout the rest of the series. I guess I’ll see how after I rewatch the episode, which for you will be with the next paragraph.

There we have it! The end to Shampoo’s introductory arc! How did I feel about it?

That’ll be more clear later on, let’s start by going over what happens in it. Ranma and Akane head back to her house, with her still unaware of who he is. Her family is only now starting to understand that this is actually happening, that Akane has somehow actually forgotten Ranma.

Shampoo shows up, when she glomps onto Ranma out of pure instinct Akane attacks him. Realizing that there is some part of her memory left unaffected, Shampoo goes to do the attack again, but Ranma intercepts it and steals the shampoo. He immediately tries using it on Akane, but it just knocks her out, it doesn’t regain the lost memories. Dr. Tofu shows up and reveals that’s because the formula he stole only takes memories, it can’t give them back.

Luckily, he has a book that has the recipe they need. Unluckily, Kasumi shows up and in his lovestruck silliness he rips the book into tiny pieces without realizing it. With no other choice, Ranma decides to head to China, since they’ll have the shampoo formula needed there. Everyone asks for personal souvenirs (though I don’t know how he’d buy any Ranma is usually broke) and Akane wonders why this stranger is doing so much for her.

Speaking of that very question, Ranma quickly runs into Shampoo, who wants to know why Ranma is trying to get Akane’s memories back so much. All he says to that is that he doesn’t like the idea of being forgotten by someone. Clearly, that is all it is, there is no other context to the situation.

She messes with Ranma a bunch, faking him out with a bunch of other kinds of shampoo, but eventually after a lot of hijinks Ranma is able to strike a deal with her: all it will take to get the memory-restoring shampoo is killing the ‘girl Ranma’. Well, half-kill, Ranma could at least negotiate to that.

And if you need someone to half-kill Ranma, of course there’s no one else to go see except Ryoga Hibiki. Only problem is, for once he doesn’t want to beat Ranma up, no matter how nicely Ranma asks. After all, if Akane’s memory is never restored, it gives him a chance to be with Akane instead. Still, Ryoga does have a temper, and Ranma eventually goads him into a fight...that Ranma quickly wins, unscathed.

Mr. Tendo and Mr. Saotome step up for the job, but Akane sees them attacking this poor defenseless (and as she sees it, weak) teenage boy and tries to stop them. That annoys Ranma, since he’s going through all this pain for her, but when he insults her in annoyance, she reacts to it. So, Ranma insults her a bunch and her memory comes back.

The only problem there is, now that Akane remembers Ranma, Shampoo is back to wanting to kill her for being an obstacle to getting with Ranma. This leaves Ranma with what he feels like is no choice, and he shows Shampoo that he’s both the man she loves and the person she was trying to kill. (Without mentioning the curse, mind you, instead telling her that he has just been ‘pretending to be a guy’) As he seemed to expect, she jumps to wanting to kill him, but it quickly becomes clear she’s crying, and she runs away, telling Ranma they’ll never see each other again. Then there is a short scene of Ranma and Akane having a spat. The end.

I think this time I'm going to start with the stuff I liked. I appreciate the structure of the narrative here, as Ranma tries one thing after another, any way he can, to solve the problem. It moved fairly quickly and was a good fodder for some jokes.

The bigger reason I liked the episode, of course, just comes from how far Ranma is willing to go to help Akane. He plans to swim to China, by himself, if it means getting her memories back. He can say whatever he wants, but I do feel like this episode was great at showing just how much he really does care about her.

It also made fairly good use of Ryoga, though it’s something they’ve done with him a few times now. By this point, it seems his love for Akane and how he sees Ranma as the thorn in his side have become his primary character traits, rather than his original driving hatred. That’s not necessarily bad, but I’m glad that, as far as I remember, it won’t be his main focus forever.

That last scene with Shampoo is also fairly strong, though I’ll get more into my thoughts on her in a second. All of the things I liked aside, there was definitely one part of this episode I really didn’t care for.

It probably sounds dumb, but I just really didn’t like the solution to the memory loss. To put it more specifically, I like the idea that they’re able to break through what’s been done to her through her connection to Ranma. I just don’t like that it involved Ranma insulting her over and over again. Like, I get it, he’s a dick to her sometimes, that reminds her of him more than all the nice things he’s been doing.

But it’s also just rough to watch, at least for me? I didn’t find it funny. In a way, the whole thing casts a strange shadow on the entire Ranma/Akane dynamic. Arguing a lot is one thing, but the sheer level to which Ranma was insulting her felt closer to negging then anything else. Especially because it’s all focused on how Akane looks, things that are clearly a big insecurity for her.

Enough worrying about those two, let’s talk about who this arc was more properly about, Shampoo (no last name)! This is our first Character Spotlight in a while, so let’s make sure it’s done well!

Let’s talk about her voice actresses, shall we? Her original Japanese voice was provided by Rei Sakuma, who was also the cat Jiji in Kiki’s Delivery Service (which is kind of funny considering something happening to Shampoo next season). Like some of the other voice actresses we’ve talked about thus far, she was in the idol group DoCo. For English, she’s portrayed by Cathy Weseluck. Some of her more well-known roles are as Near in Death Note and Spike in My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. (Both of which are not roles I’d expect from Shampoo’s voice actress.)

They both play Shampoo very similarly, I’d say. Shampoo has a very high-pitched voice, and at least so far her vocabulary in ‘Japanese’ isn’t very large, so half the time she sticks with Chinese instead. This gives her an almost baby-like quality to her voice, which is contrasted by how cold it is when she starts talking about how Ranma or Akane have to die. What I would say as a point of delineation, at least so far, is that Sakuma’s performance feels more genuine, while Weseluck makes it seem like the childishness is just a front, it doesn’t sound sincere.

That kind of voice, genuine or not, is pretty emblematic of what we’ve seen of Shampoo thus far. Namely, that she’s fairly simple. Shampoo is chasing after Ranma, to kill or to marry, because of ancient traditions of her people, not because of what she really wants. Yet she pursues him relentlessly anyway. She’s eager to fight, eager to love, and absolutely willing to use underhanded methods to remove anyone from the picture if they get in her way.

I will say that, in terms of fighting ability, it’s pretty vague thus far how good Shampoo is. Ranma is capable of beating her with no problem over and over again, but she never gets to really fight Akane, all she does is give her hair the works.

Speaking of Akane, I will say that Shampoo’s presence does highlight certain aspects of her character. They’re both rather jealous, and prone to violence over it. But where Akane and Ranma are still trying to work through their baggage, Shampoo is down to cuddle from second one. Shampoo is also the first other fiance of Ranma’s, though that’s less something planned out for him and more something he made happen by accident.

I guess it’s time to talk about it, no use putting it off any longer. Shampoo has never really been a character I liked in the franchise, and part of the fun of this Rewatch is seeing how my thoughts have grown on her. I used to just kind of find her annoying, but now there’s more there too. Namely, racism. Yeah, the broken English/Japanese she speaks, combined with how she’s written in general, give Shampoo a kind of ‘dumb’ quality that never sat well with me, especially now that I know that it’s emblematic of the kind of stereotypes Japanese people tend to have about people from China. I still hope to have my opinion changed on Shampoo, but it hasn’t really happened yet.

It hasn’t been made clear yet, so I will say now that I do like this episode. It has some good comedy, I enjoy the hints of Ranma’s burgeoning devotion to Akane, and it closes out Shampoo’s initial storyline pretty well. But I’m also mixed on it, mostly just because of that insulting scene. It’s strange, having a story that I liked about 80% of, because it’s difficult knowing how to weigh that 20% that I didn’t care for. (Also, can I just say I hate that the title feels like a lie?) In the end, I’m placing this just one spot above the last episode, which means the current standing is thus:

Episode 7: Enter Ryoga, the Eternal ‘Lost Boy’

Episode 12: A Woman's Love is War! The Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics Challenge!

Episode 15: Enter Shampoo, the Gung-Ho Girl! I Put My Life in Your Hands

Episode 9: True Confessions! A Girl's Hair is Her Life!

Episode 2: School is No Place for Horsing Around

Episode 6: Akane's Lost Love... These Things Happen, You Know

Episode 13: A Tear in a Girl-Delinquent's Eye? The End of the Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics Challenge!

Episode 17: I Love You, Ranma! Please Don’t Say Goodbye

Episode 16: Shampoo's Revenge! The Shiatsu Technique That Steals Heart and Soul

Episode 8: School is a Battlefield! Ranma vs. Ryoga

Episode 11: Ranma Meets Love Head-On! Enter the Delinquent Juvenile Gymnast!

Episode 4: Ranma and...Ranma? If It’s Not One Thing, It’s Another

Episode 5: Love Me to the Bone! The Compound Fracture of Akane's Heart

Episode 1: Here’s Ranma

Episode 3: A Sudden Storm of Love

Episode 10: P-P-P-Chan! He's Good For Nothin'

Episode 14: Pelvic Fortune-Telling? Ranma is the No. One Bride in Japan

Next time, we are closing out the season! It’s kind of strange to consider that, I’m actually almost done with the first season of the series, known here in the States as “Digital Dojo” and in Japan as the only season of Ranma 1/2. (The next season to the end was all Ranma 1/2 Nettōhen) Will I like I Am a Man! Ranma's Going Back to China!? That’s the big question, and I’m eager to see. Ta ta for now!

#episode 17 #I Love You Ranma! Please Don’t Say Goodbye #ranma 1/2 #ranma saotome #akane tendo #shampoo #anime analysis #anime rewatch

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