#now that this is getting notes I feel compelled to tell you this was abt bna

[nazumichi]

i love it when characters are package deals, i love duos i love trios i love quartets, i love groups and squads, i love it when you can’t find one without the other(s), i love it when they’re glued at the hip, i love it no matter the context of these dynamics, i lov

#raii talks a lot #i will see a character and go “put that beast in a group” (very literal sometimes too) #now that this is getting notes I feel compelled to tell you this was abt bna

[juvederm]

actually yapping

feel like a lot of my thoughts about not getting enough notes or whatever on a drawings can be dissolved by just accepting that art of the Game (its plot, events, etc) will pop off more than some self indulgent sketch. people will like things they can recognize, which i was aware of but i just thought that my art would reach the fandom people, yk the ones who are not just attached to the story but the characters too. so making recognizable art of the game wouldn't matter bc it would instead be of the characters

but the thing is, making Serious art of the game is tough. it's hard coming up with ideas, and who knows if the process is gonna be fun or extremely grueling. and on top of that, what hasn't been done so far? every idea has been drawn, been brought to life. the game is like 8 years old now. i kinda don't wanna draw more "Mountain. Blood. Snow. Ugly winter outfits" anymore lol. i mean sometimes i do bc i love the game obviously but when i wanna have fun, i'll tend to do other things that kinda combine with my own personal interests. so like fashion for example, i'll take the characters and dress them up. that's me having fun.

i want to think and Know that people understand this concept, but it feels like they don't? maybe they do. i know for a fact my mutuals do, because you are all very supportive of every silly josh doodle i make lol i appreciate it a lot 🤗 you guys are the kind of people i make this art for, the Character Likers. because i myself am someone who will attach to the characters more than like, the story. which isn't to say i just disregard the source material, that's not it at all, but for me regarding UD, imma be honest yall... i do not give a fuck abt the creature lore in the game at all. i don't care abt billy bates and whatnot. it's fine if you do, but me personally ehhh i don't care much abt that part of the story

i really like the characters out of all of this, i like certain dynamics, dialogue, etc. and i love the story too, and especially love when the story involves the characters (which i think the sanitarium segments doesn't really do? it kinda just gives insight on the 1950s mine incident and shjt) but i like the parts of the story relating to the twins. bc those are characters and they kinda haunt the narrative.

speaking of the narrative, it's part of the reason i like josh. he doesn't haunt the narrative but he controls it a lot id say. he's a very captivating character, very compelling. you want a lot out of him, like what's wrong, why is he doing this, why did he say that, blah blah. i honestly love characters that are attractive in this way, even to other characters in the story. so sam and chris for example. i enjoy the dynamic they have with josh because they're worried about him, they're thinking about him, or they want to know if he's okay, what's up with him and all that. he holds their attention like that, and ofc that led to ships and stuff. i feel like ashley's actress said it best when describing josh: "you think he's one way but then he's another"

which is honestly just so fucking true. you think he's dead, then he's not, you think he's okay but then he's not, you think he might live but he doesn't. he's even like that personality wise i'd say, but that's teetering onto like headcanon territory just somewhat. because sam does say "it's hard to tell with him" but that's mostly bc of the incident with the twins, she can't Tell if he's okay or barely hanging on. josh is hard to pin down, he's Complex, as stated in the game

sorry for getting into a little josh analysis there but since he is an important character (in general) to me, i kinda felt the need. because this also goes into my gripes about people not really getting why i draw him the way i do. j know i won't shut up about this, but i just Want everyone to know, bc i feel as though it was part of the reason why i wasn't really interacted with for as long as i've been a part of this fandom. like nobody really understood what i was doing, but it was really just simple fun. i mean, now i've completely given up hope with ever really Connectinf with the fandom, but i just want this off my chest honesrly lol

like i really don't want to keep drawing josh one way. like i said i wanna have fun so that's what i do. i can't really "make an him an oc" because i don't change anything about his story or writing. putting him in a silly outfit doesn't make him eligible for "original characterification" lol. so that's what i mean by i make a lot my art for the fandom people, the ones who like the game for more than its story, people who like making headcanons, people who like writing for the game, etc

and the reason i do it a lot is bc of what i said before. making art of the game is tough, it's a lot of thinking. what Hasn't been done already? not much lol. so i'll just keep sketching the silly stuff and sharing it with cool ppl who kinda get what i'm doing 👍

but i definitely will make art of the game and not just the characters, i'll make art more recognizable to the average player because guess what. that's also what i like. it just takes a long time for me because Serious art has a lot of thinking and planning behind it and is just very time consuming in general. but oh, josh in a skirt? took two minutes and i can just close my ipad and not worry about anything else lol

i hope this made sense??!?&?@ i kinda wanted to talk to people about it so if anyone else feels the same way i'd love to know. i'll prob make a followup sometime soon but i just wanted to get all my thoughts out in one place because i've kinda collected them all finally leleleleel

#txt

[monstrsball]

more college au thoughts..... talk to me about iwasuga? how do they get together? what do they love most about each other? i'm curious abt this ship in general, i've never really thought about it before knowing you liked it

iwasuga is my number one "makes no damn sense... compels me though" rare pair and i can't even explain why i like it so much, i just... do.

side note: i meant to post this way earlier but my family wanted to play a board game right as i was about to finish it and then when i did finish it was like... 2 am so i decided to wait to post it.

anyway! here's what i was thinking of for the college au. (disclaimer: i may be projecting on suga a little here but don't worry about it)

getting together:

it's a major slowburn. because slowburn friends to lovers is like... my favorite trope. i like to suffer.

i’m not entirely sure who falls first but suga is the first one to actually realize that he has feelings for iwaizumi. it's towards the end of their first year and he fully intends to do something about it but then iwaizumi starts talking about how he's planning on studying abroad in the states his second year and he decides to wait. he tells daichi this and daichi thinks him waiting is a stupid idea and he should just go for it now but suga is like "as if i'm taking romance advice from you, daichi" and leaves it at that. he also confides in asahi but asahi doesn't try to give him advice, he just gives him that look that tells him he also disapproves with him wanting to wait. 

and then suga decides against doing anything entirely because on one of their video calls, iwaizumi talks about his meeting with utsui and his plans to intern under him after he graduates. and suga kinda assumes that means iwaizumi is planning on moving to california after he graduates... even though that's not what iwaizumi said. but honestly it's just suga looking for an excuse to chicken out because he is kind of insecure so he thinks iwaizumi is out of his league anyways. 

on iwaizumi's end, it just takes him a while to actually realize that he has feelings for suga. i dare say it may have even been him who fell first, he just didn't realize it. i don’t really know what leads him to realize (i’m thinking maybe he gets jealous of someone suga is seeing and kuroo points it out but idk) but it would probably be when he first comes back from his year abroad. when he does, he immediately confesses because i kinda feel like iwaizumi would just... go for it, you know? 

once they get together? they’re the sappiest couple ever. i feel like iwaizumi is definitely the type to be like... surprisingly clingy and affectionate with his significant other and he does not care what anyone else thinks about it (which is funny bc when other couples do it, he’s like ‘this is disgusting’). 

what they love about each other: (sappiness incoming)

for both of them, they love just how much the other person cares so much about the people in their lives. iwaizumi and suga are both incredibly caring and protective people and they would definitely recognize those same traits in other people. 

suga loves iwaizumi’s goofy side, he likes when iwaizumi geeks out over his monster movies. it’s very endearing to him. he likes that iwaizumi is kind of a momma’s boy (my own personal hc). most of all, he just loves the soft affectionate side of him that only suga seems to be able to bring out. 

as much as he acts otherwise, iwaizumi loves suga’s mischievousness, the face he makes when he’s up to something is both the scariest and cutest thing iwaizumi has ever seen. he loves how quickly he can get suga (who is usually very shameless) to blush just by calling him a pet name or being extra sappy. he also loves being able to see a different side of suga that no one else does.

#college au #this ended up a LOT longer than i thought it would be #thank you for indulging my weird rare pair

[pantoranqira]

Okay! So! Just finished RLs and it was better than I expected! Definitely liked Soule's run WAY better than Milligan's, he had way better character development and made you actually care about the RLs (especially the side ones) way more, plus he actually got me to enjoy Red Lantern Guy Gardner, which was a feat in and of itself. That said, both Atrocitus and Dex-starr weren't really too likable in it, and more often than not, stood as antagonists or even villains, so I could see where fans of them would get fed up.

Like even throughout Milligan's run, which was pretty Atrocitus focused, you weren't really siding with him, and were kind of just sitting there watching him punch people and cry about rage until it swapped back to something interesting, like whatever Bleez was doing. Also SPEAKING of Bleez, I don't think she was really used to her full potential in either run. You see bits of it and both, and a bit more in Soule's run than Milligan's, but the writing surrounding her is just unbearable at times. For the majority of the comic, she's the only female main character and is just so sexualized all the time. Like almost all of her interactions with men are just so weird and almost disingenuous to her character??? Like idk especially in Milligan's run (but a bit in Soule's too just w a diff. vibe) a lot of her scenes feel very male gazey and whatnot. Compare all that to my two favorite Bleez scenes, (one Milligan, one Soule) both of which are with another woman, and you really get a much clearer and more compelling look at her character. The first, between her and Fatality of the Star Sapphires is semi early on, maybe abt half way through, and you really get a good look at her anger and pain, but also that first inkling of her being able to change and find peace, in Bleez almost joining the Star Sapphires. It's a great moment of conflict, and really shows you some of the potential later down the line w/ her character. The second is between her and Kara Zor-El (when Kara was a Red Lantern) and has to be one of, if not my no. 1 fave moment of the series. There, Bleez is injured, and feeling emotional after Rankorr just saved her life (ugh Rankorr 🙄) and Kara asks what it means to be a Red Lantern? What the point is, what makes it all worth it? And to that Bleez tells her something she'd been thinking about for a while, saying it's to make sure that there are no more Red Lanterns, which really is just such a sweet moment, and it really reminds you that these people were victims. They became these things because of their pain and suffering, and it really paints a picture of what the RL corps should be. Also Bleez and Kara decide to be friends, it's a really great moment.

And on that note, I really like where Soule ended it. I mean I think it probably could have ended two or three issues earlier, but I do appreciate him keeping it going just to wrap up Guy's issues and why he became a RL again in the first place, but that said, I'd be VERY disappointed if DC went and undid all the good stuff that happened at the end of this run. (And I'm sure they have already, this ended in like 2014/2015 and it's comics so it's probably been fucked up by now but STILL). Like it was definitely not the best for Atrocitus and Dex-starr, but the things they did with Ratchett, Skollox, and Zilius Zox??? DUDE. They (along w Bleez) really grew the most out of this series and I will be absolutely devastated if I learned that someone undid their deaths. I feel what they did is really the goal with RL characters. Their rage is unsustainable, they can't go on like that forever (that's how you get an Atrocitus) but having that second chance to fight back against those who hurt you, growing and changing yourself into a better person in the process? Like dude. That's what a RL book should be about. Especially that bit with Ratchett, where he grew past his rage and let go of his ring??? DUDE. and like Zilius Zox? Which I cannot BELIEVE Soule got me to care abt Zilius Zox, the dude is a total asshole, but him and Guy together were just so great. I mean never have I ever laughed at a death scene like that. Comparing him to a giant testicle? Just wow.

Anyways this has been way longer than I thought but to summarize: character development on side RLs good, Atrocitus pretty unsympathetic and who cares, Rankorr (I forgot to talk about him) literally so bland, I don't get the hype and it was weird how attached Bleeze got to him tbh (and how like he was sooooooo special because he was a human dude), but going into it this was definitely a series I had low expectations for, and it started out pretty trash mediocre with some good moments, then jumped up in quality with the author change, surprising me with some really GREAT character moments near the end. I think if they had kept these developments (which I'm not sure if they did, bc comics, and I've only ever read one RL appearance after this series ended) than they had a foundation to build something really great with the Red Lantern Corps

#yeah so idk whats the state of the RLs right now in continuity so idk if they kept any of the changes from this run #like ive read the red earth arc in gls (2016) and like that has both Atrocitus and Bleeze working together i think and that was like #DEFINITELY not the case at the end of this run soooo #but also like maybe he was coercing her or smth? i dont really remember i was more focused on simonjess while reading that one #also volthoom is a little bitch and hes SO ANNOYING #like yes he was in like 2 issues but i hate him so much. i swear he pops up and causes shit like every two or three years now in the lanter #n books its like DUDE! FUCK OFF NO ONE CARES ABT YOU! also the guardians fhsjfj couldnt give a shit about them i swear they're like getting #genocided like every other issue (they are also war criminals so like kinda cancels out? idk) anyways they keep coming back #i just dont really care what theyre doing they all seem like such assholes #also "guardians of the universe'' pretentious mfs #oh god i sound like a gl villain what is this #its fine its not like theyre wrong #wait what was i saying #oh yeah #red lantern #red lanterns #red lanterns (2011) #guy gardner #atrocitus #bleez #zilius zox #skollox #rankorr #ratchett #dc comics

[jiminrings]

honestly i could talk w band!hobi abt numbers all day, like i wouldn't even mind. what are ur thoughts on 27 hobi? i think they a bad bitch. also UM might i request a drabble abt like a film major! yn (that is very enthusiastic abt films and the aesthetics + cinematography and whatnot) w like,,, a theatre kid?? any of ot7 works fine and it's all good if u can't or don't want to! thankyouu 💜

muse of mine

pairing: namjoon x y/n

wordcount: 4k

glimpse: namjoon’s always been a little sensitive to feedback whether it’s positive or negative, y/n’s an endearing type of talker, and smuggled snacks to the theater haven’t ever tasted this sweet :D // gif from pinterest!

notes: i kinda switched it up a lil bit and made them more established in their respective fields bc my mind went berserk on this concept!!! also this is mayhaps my oNLY piece that’s just pure fluff

“27? The number? Hmm. That sounds... sexy.” - band!hobi

this been’s bugging you for the past half hour

this whole experience feels oddly familiar

you’ve been in this theater for half an hour so far to watch this play!!

lmao ur gonna admit RIGHT off the bat that theatre’s definitely not it for you

your slight unfondness for it is deeply-rooted back to university and for four years, you’ve consistently taken dumps on theatre kids even if it’s under your breath

alright it’s possible that you don’t hATE the actual people ( only some of them ;D ) themselves but rather this whole type of cockiness and the “i’m a direct descendant of shakespeare himself. trust me bro. on god” energy that they always seem to exhude

but realistically, maybe this deep-rooted hate stemmed from seokjin

he was the guy you’d share the exact same elective class with him for two straight whole semesters and you’ve been seatmates from time to time

homie took foreign language as an elective?????

the language is korean?????????????????

“wait b-but i — aren’t you — n-no but i really???”

that’s what you first sputtered to him in realization when he took his seat beside you

the two of you have only ever shown each other notes bc the other was dozing off and the occasional sharing of gummy bears that’s already pre-opened to not make any noise

but for some reason, it’s only dawned in you why seokjin’s a god in this class and he answers your questions without even looking at his notes by hALFWAY through the whole semester of foreign language

one day, u are gonna find a way to bodyslam yourself and never recover from it ever again

“mhmm. don’t sweat it, sweetheart. i personally think it’s very don quixote of me to y’know, take something as impractical and amusing as this.”

you snort at his choice of words because honestly!! you barely remember don quixote and jin’s use of it as an adjective jigs up a refresher course on your brain

who was he again?? 

was he the donkey

.. or are you thinking about shrek again because of your film analysis

you sWEAR there was a donkey in that story

it’s good fun to talk with jin even if he keeps sliding bourgeoisie words here and there and you’re a lil confused with all these references that he makes but that’s okay !!!

atleast even him saying it in a long-winded way that he was like someone from the merchant of somewhere, you know now that he pretty-pleased and charmed his way to the registrar for him to take korean as an elective

...

two weeks later, jin sits next to you in class 

in ACTUAL non-elective, non-native language he already speaks class

now that you’re squinting a bit more, jin does look a little uh?? different

his hair that was once a hybrid of lavender and peach and pink and then blonde was now wholly black and it’s probably his original hair color because it matches with those eyebrows of his!!!

his combo of a black bomber jacket with a silk button-up underneath honestly SLAPS and it makes you forget how he used to exclusively wear only knitted shirts and argyle-patterned cardigans

you have ur jaw dropped because you totally would’ve fallen for seokjin jAW-FIRST 

— if only he didn’t strike you as the brother type when he smacked the back of your head because you were falling asleep on class again and uhhh you mUst be forgetting that the two of you were sitting in front

you had no time to reevaluate whether you should develop a crush for him or not 

he’s immediately slapping his hands on his knees, looking at you so intensely before pointing a finger at you with so much conviction, and then scoffing to himself

“switched majors to film. theatre was gonna be the death of me!!! y/n, if you even think about trying to switch to that cheap, amazon-ordered quill and tanning lights for stage lighting major, you’re absolutely dEAD to me-”

you’ve never had a conversation this striking nor long with jin but you genuinely have no complaints at all

seokjin talks pure shit about theatre and theatre junkies and everything in between for the WHOLE day 

trails beside you for every single class you had, which was convenient because he can then sweet-talk his way again (if anybody even dared to question him) that he’s just newly-switched 

sat with you for lunch and him not eating because he just needS to tell you all about it and you trying not to choke on your pasta as you try to reply to him

followed you back hOME and decided to crash the night there

yeah, that. your unfondness for theatre’s rooted on that one

uh-huh safe to say that you’ve become best friends with jin ever since that day

you’re a sponge for your friends and jin’s the closest one you have, so it was only natural that you soak up his distastes and whatnot

not to brag but aha :D

you add salt to the water while you boil pasta so u may be a little bit of a masterchef or somewhat, no big deal :D

he’s absorbed your fascination for all kinds of lights and fixtures that he has about seven different nightlights in the form of squishies or neon and everything else on his bedside table, in which he turns all of them on at night

fun fact: he’s capable of sleeping in the dark

jin’s the whole reason for your stance on this

he’s adamant about his points and you’ve graduated uni four years ago!!!

which is why you DON’T get why jin would give you a scented black envelope, with “don’t come to this” scribbled in gold at the front, carrying a single ticket to this play with a sticky note saying “don’t watch this at 7 pm, wearing your boss lady year-end award show type of clothes, sitting at the ninth row from the back and two seats from your right.”

because of course!! what the hell did he expect you to do? NOT come to this play at 7 pm wearing your boss lady year-end award show type of clothes then sitting at the ninth row from the back, two seats from the right???

OF COURSE YOU WOULD

your goal in life is to do exactly the opposite of what jin tells you. there’s literally nothing else in life you’d want to fulfill

he’s made it quite easy for you to spite him and although you wouldn’t admit it.,,.,., you may be a little petty ok

he’s the even bigger goof out of the two of you and you can never have the final say!! it’s always him and his wit and yOU being the dunce

it’s a lil sus that jin’s basically ASKING for it with his instructions but whatever

whatever it is, this is finally your chance to enact the final say and you’re gonna pull ALL the stops

all you know about theater-goers is that they dress fancy and wear these mini binoculars and that’s about it

there’s not even one film you know that you see anyone in the audience wearing a worn-in cardigan or even a puffer jacket even if the theater’s mad cold

all the people bring are scarves and shawls???? thee thinnest version of a blanket that won’t warm them up against the frigid airconditioning

that whole dress code sounds ridiculous!!! great please ring out this thousand-dollar dress im gonna wear to the theater thank u

you’re a little worried that you’re not gonna blend into the crowd, but after some digging about the invitation, formal wear is most definitely recommended

it’s an exclusive invite-only play which would be later released to the general public later on so yeah the situation dOES call for a gown thank u very much

also how could you forget that jin explicitly told you not to wear this type of attire

if you’re being humble right now, which you always normally are, even if that jUST sounded boastful talking about how you’re humble all the time —

you do look pretty breath-taking :-)

even when the doors weren’t opened and everyone’s just collectively loitering outside the hall, you’d feel glances at you

the sweet security guard did a double-take at you and mumbled a “very very nice evening to you, miss :D” instead of his normal “enjoy the show!” to the other patrons before you

you’re gonna soak all the silent compliments up and try to remember all of them before writing them on your journal later hee-hee

your midnight blue satin dress that’s floor-length and off-shoulder is dEFINITELY in your favor :D

your dress still glimmers even if the spotlight isn’t on you and you wish you weren’t shy to ask a random stranger to take a picture of you

going on self-timer isn’t ideal either when there’s like a hundred other people in the room

they probably wouldn’t even care if you took a picture of yourself!!! but in your head they probably think that you’re laughable so you’d rather not.. do that

the theater’s dark as hell if that wasn’t established

it is literally pitch black in the room and the ushers at each row holding the flashlights that are meant to guide the patrons aren’t exactly helpful

big kudos to them though,, must take a lot of self-control to not wave their lights like it was a rave :D

a flashlight tHAT bright?? whew pls is this what ships feel in the night

the last time you were in a rave, your thirty minutes of fun was cut short when seokjin immediately got hammered and wouldn’t stop throwing a fit if you didn’t drive him home that instant

his energy seemed to compelling everyone that he’s managed to somehow suck the energy out of a WHOLE rave so you took him home for everyone’s enjoyment :(((( except yours apparently

you’re trying hard to focus on the play that’s happening because for the past twenty minutes, all you’ve done is zone out randomly with ideas all of a sudden 

you NEED to listen

....

uh-huh...

UH-HUH......

wait this is actually.. good

you find plays hard to follow and absolutely boring when you don’t immerse yourself in a run-down PRIOR to watching it in order to get

it’s the same analogy as reading the plot of a movie on wikipedia before watching the movie at the cinema.... absolutely useless

it sucks out the fun from something you weren’t supposed to know

watching plays is two hours of you being confused, going home to read the plot and only understand it by tHEN, and never coming to the theater again because you’d waste your money.... watching something cluelessly in the theater..... for a plot you’d grasp at home

but no

because this one

actually this one that you’re watching...

it’s not bad

it’s nice, actually.

within two minutes, you managed to grasp that it’s a story about a never-ending spring between these two lovers

there’s something about the whole setting of it actually that just sucks you in

in some plays, the outfits would seem so forced even in the given context that it reminds you of uh a particular superhero movie

and yes ur aware that stage makeup has to be enhanced so that people all the way to the back row would see

but there’s just something in this scene that’s laid out right-now that actually gets you in awe

it’s of the couple in the back of their pick-up truck and everything about it seems so natural

the background straight up looks like what it’d be if you were to go outside

the guy’s arm around her shoulder seems so natural and in nature that it doesn’t feel like a random cue in the script

the girl twinkles and it doesn’t even feel like a forced type of laugh you’d cue in attempt to warm the audience’s hearts

it’s of a plot where the the guy eventually falls out of love with the girl, while girl gets even more smitten with the guy at the same time

it’s what you take from the past ten minutes that you watch in dead silence, and you don’t even remember in the back of your head that you’re supposed to hate plays

“no way.”

you mumble in disbelief under your breath, head shaking profusely

is your mind playing tricks on you???

you’ve got too used to seokjin sitting beside you that you immediately turn to your right, whispering out your concerns 

“is it just me or is she wearing a different shade of pink?”

you don’t even buffer for one second when you ask the stranger beside you

you’re so concerned that you’re looking at him intently while waiting for his answer that could either console or despair you, a random theater-goer that’s too noisy with her questions for her own good

it’s absolutely dARK as fuck in the theater but after awhile your eyes adjusted slightly

and the first thing you look at after the stage is him

him as in the dude in your right that you just asked all of a sudden

you could only see his silhouette and the faintest features of his face along with his well-dressed suit but god

... you are totally not lying if you say that even the barest silhouette of him doesn’t look handsome

you’re expecting him to tell you off for being so noisy but instead, he’s the one who takes you by surprise

“how did you notice that?” 

:O

“oh my god!” you exclaim almost too loudly that you yourself even jolts, the guy even making you duck with him slightly for a brief second, “im sO sorry!! am i accidentally spoiling it out for you?”

the guy blinks twice, lips slightly parted before shaking his head no

“no, no... this is the first screening — i mean uh, how would you know that?”

oh boy

you’re adjusting yourself on your seat, bum now warm as you try to explain and not be nervous because what if you just made a wrong assumption about this play and you’re sitting next to a goddamn tHEATRE BUFF???

“well i —uh, uhm what’s your name?” you’re flustered and the FIRST thing you ask is what was his name.,.,,

he seems equally as flustered before he adjusts his glasses, “o-oh uhm i’m namjoon...?”

alright! handsome guy is namjoon!

“you see, namjoon — okay it might just be in my head, but i tHINK it looks deeper with the light somehow. but uh...? the spotlight’s not following her and — is it just me or without the light, her sweater looks brown?”

you’re squinting and if u squint even more, maybe your contacts would just crumple by then

hold on a second

“brown, like — oh my gOD LIKE-”

namjoon puts a hand over his mouth before you could even gasp, hand reaching out for your forearm even before you manage to grasp his shoulder to take it in realization

was it under your nose the whole time??

“... fall.”

:D

holy fucking shit

namjoon looks positively euphoric looking at your face of realization, his once-heavy chest about the whole scene becoming completely devoid of weight

“exactly!!”

his confirmation makes you inwardly squeal, grinning as you point at him and the stage back and forth

“i think this is the first play i’ve become ever interested in watching.”

okay what now

his ears perk up at that, your first sentence that you’ve said after your pink sweater that looks like spring also looks brown like fall in certain scene because of the lighting realization

“it is?”

he takes the chance to look at you as best as he could, trying to play his squinting as cool as he can

namjoon’s far sighted and the glasses he’s wearing are nOT up to date with his current grade bc he’s pretty sure his eyesight’s worsened the past month

he can’t make you out wholly, but he does know that you’re pretty

his eyes don’t linger on you because of the snacks you’re fishing from your purse while you talk that are absolutely illegal in this theater house lmao

but instead, his gaze lingers on you because you’re so pretty

the minimal light that’s bouncing off the stage is enough for him to see a faint outline of your features, highlighting your smiles just right and your dress to glint underneath

“mhmm. i actually hate plays,” suddenly, you’re not scared if namjoon happens to be some sort of theatre buff and you’re offending him because honestly, you feel at ease. “crunch?” you’re holding out the mini bar of chocolate out to him, one he politely declines to because his eyes are bulging out the next second

“you do????”

his genuine reaction indulges you, making you grin ultimately that you put off eating snacks for now to focus on him

“yeah! this is my hate outfit :D”

namjoon giggles as if it’s the funniest thing he’s ever heard

you automatically scoot closer because this time, it’s yOUR turn to shush him

this is totally for just the reason of talking more discreetly and not distracting anyone and is totally not an excuse to be closer to the next guy and touch shoulders with him then get a whiff of cologne because it’s rare for a guy to be handsome and aLSO smell good

your eyes get used to the darkness and eventually, you could make out features of namjoon beside you

he has the prettiest eyes you’ve ever seen

and the way he looks at you makes you feel safe and even your height difference is visible with how probably lonG his torso is compared to yours, his gaze doesn’t make you feel small

namjoon’s still (unsurprisingly) far-sighted and ur so close that he’s a lil cross-eyed 

fuck it he’s gonna go to ophthalmologist FIRST thing in the morning tomorrow

“then why are you here?”

“my friend seokjin,” you lean back upon realizing the original reason why you’re here, the situation being so ironic that you puff out a smile

your friend’s named seokjin?

cool :D kim seokjin is namjoon’s of his favorite directors eVER!!

second best for him actually though.,., no one could quite compare to his first

your explanation makes him cackle several times, a swell of pride recounting why you hate (it’ll be past tense probably after this one) theatre 

“what about you?”

you turn the question to him, making his dimples disappear effectively that you think you’ve just spooked him

“i uh, well i always wanted to see a story that went like this, so i’m here.”

“you’re a critic? oh god. please don’t tell me you heard all my mumbles.”

no this is even WORSE

namjoon’s not a theatre buff

HE’S A CRITIC????????????

god im coming up

“don’t worry, i also think that the drapings must probably be dirty.”

he breaks out into a smile recounting how you were talking to yourself earlier, a snort escaping him involuntarily 

“RIGHT??? it’s like how do you even clean them?? do they fit in washing machines or-”

my god he’s such a nice guy!!!

in fact, he’s everything you want in a guy

you’ve went through atleast twelve facets of emotions for the past hour and you’re not even dating!!!!!!!

“my thoughts exactly!! and if it’s by hand, how do you even scrub the entirety of it?? or wring the water out??”

namjoon KNOWS exactly what’s up :’)

“is there even a clothesline that’d bEAR the weight??”

the two of you are so happy that you just look at each other laughing, a moment in time before namjoon nudges you to lean back because the ending’s happening

you don’t even question him how he’d know that it’s the ending and not just another opening to a new scene, just listening to him

you’re so happy

the play made you happy but namjoon made you even happier :-)

“if you are a critic, you should probably open up your review with this chatty play-hating girl beside you, then at the end, close it off with how she loves it.”

it’s the parting conversation as you realize and holy fuck you are nOT ready for it

you r gonna drag this out for as long as you could <3

......

and namjoon wants in too <3

“noted. if i was a playwright, i’d even make you the lead. which detail should i include? offering me wrapper-covered rice crispy snacks, or asking how you’d watch it while going thru the bathroom?”

this feels so natural

as natural as the couple in the play you’ve just finished watching :))

“you’re hilarious,” you’re not even the slightest bit annoyed and your restrained smile tells him all about it

yea you may have brought in snacks illegally but you aRE gathering your trash up as you’re a decent human being

namjoon wishes you’d pick up after yourself slowly, standing up from his seat as he has the plan of picking up trash that isn’t even his

“what name should i put then?”

you’re silent and oh god he thinks you found his company stupid and would definitely not give him your name

you’re not ignoring him though!!!

his words are still stuck in your head, realizing it lately with his “which detail should i include?”

“me wanting to turn this into a film, actually.”

you test the words out on your tongue, nodding to yourself after a few seconds that you seem so sure of it

“yeah. i wanna make it into a film.”

the lights turn on after being dim for so long, namjoon’s eyes going wide trying to digest what you’ve just said

“w-what?

.....

no fucking way

HOLY FUCKING SHIT SWFRWFBWRHGBRBVWRV SWBHJSDB SHJAVBHGJDS BWHRGHBSVWBGRH

namjoon’s malfunctioning as he’s looking at you from eye to eye, bottom lip trembling while he’s so keen at pointing at you

“y-you’re miss y/n!!”

....

right

oH RIGHT

he’s a fan of yours??

namjoon’s fanning his face because he’s about to literally burst into tears

how could he nOT???

how could he not be emotional when all along, he’s been talking to his number one favorite director????

you and your films are the absolute gems of his life namjoon’s not even kidding

your films were world-renowned for being so natural and sentimental without loading too much into it!!!! you’re known for being so humble through the multiple back-to-back awards and praise you get!!!! 

he cannot calm the fUCK down when you’re rubbing circles on his back

“you w-want to turn my play into a film?”

oh my gOD

you’re fumbling for the envelope and it’s only nOW that you realize that it’s not from seokjin in the first place

spring day a play by kim namjoon an invite for director y/n y/l/n

“it’s you!!!!”

“no it’s YOU!!”

jin’s plan worked alright :D

he’s just FOUR rows behind you lmao

it was just two weeks ago when yoongi, the executive producer of his film that he was directing, let it slip that he was co-financing a play

he met yoongi some semesters later after he became close with you, and he’s aLSO converted yoongi into hating theatre then he fit right in to your little posse of theatre kid-hating film students

that gave jin the laugh of his laugh and yoongi was not joking at all

“no, no. i’m telling you man. it’s different! i even have the script that i’ll let you read.”

and holy shit it IS different

if you see a couple tears on the last seven pages of yoongi’s copy of spring day’s script then mind yo oWN fucking business

then two weeks later, here he is :D

jin managed to also convert you to love theatre even IF it is namjoon’s play that did all the work

( also coincidentally found you a future boyfriend because he’s tired of seeing you alone and the closest you’d get to having someone is projecting your yearning into writing the scripts for the films you’d make )

he’s also secretly co-financed the whole play along with yoongi and he’ll drop that bomb later on lmao

“and that must mean i looked like a total FOOL beside you oh my god im so sorry!!”

namjoon panics at that, about to cry when another realization hits him when he’s about to put his head on his hands

“then that means the friend who gave you the ticket was-”

SEOKJIN VBFHSBVHSFBVSFHDVBSJFV SFJVJSFVSJVSSV SSV V FS FSV SFBVRBVRSVSWVGU

he cries to your shoulder and you never expected to be hugging and consoling someone you’ve just met two hours ago, a more than fond smile on your face he takes advantage of when he sneaks in the chance to ask you

“do you mean that?”

“now why would i lie to the playwright who’s been listening to me talk shit, then theorizing, then crying for the past hour?”

it’s true though

namjoon’s seen it all

he’s still handsome as ever even when he sniffles, his dimples on display when you return his question

“now did you mean it? writing me into your play?”

why are you even ASKING

:D

he’s the biggest fan of u

namjoon’s made notes of your work, dedicated scripts to your movies, and he’s thinking about how it’s not yet hitting you how your whole epiphany about the pink sweater turning brown on his play,,, was entirely inspired from you and your affinity for lighting in your films

he thinks it’s still a little early to kiss you on the cheek even if you’ve already hugged, instead settling on pinching your cheek with satisfaction present in all corners

“you’ve always been my muse.”

#feedback pls and thank you :D I WAS SCREAMING THE WHOLE TIME I HAVE A TEST TOMORROW I NEED TO SLEEP #namjoon #kim namjoon #namjoon imagine #namjoon imagines #namjoon oneshot #namjoon oneshots #namjoon x y/n #namjoon x reader #namjoon fluff #namjoon au #namjoon fluff imagine #namjoon fluff imagines #namjoon fic #namjoon fics #namjoon fic recs #namjoon scenario #bts namjoon imagine

[smallestclowninthecircus]

Season 3 notes popping off

due to my desire to not completely fail all my classes this year i made myself slow down significantly while listening to this season, and the fact that the other person i'm listening along with had to catch up. We've managed to convert several other people to start listening and its pretty great.

ep 81: what does it even mean to be chosen by one of them? And if he was chosen by the eye. we know Gertrude wasnt? Because she cut the eyes out of the magazines?

ep 82: elias lmao. I understand why people like him so much bahshdhdk i thought he was gonna snitch on Jon but he didnt so he's fine. Ok but how do we think he knew all that stuff. Idk probably just institute connections. I love the fact that the recorder just wants to record stuff randomly bjahsjdhd. Elias feels a lot like Michael in the sense that he knows more than he should and talks in a way that implies he just wants to wait and see how things play out for his own benefit. I understand him knowing the things that happened but his description of her emotions implies something paranormal. Maybe he's connected to one of the entities. Which one I cannot guess.

ep 83: did a file get delivered randomly to the place he's staying at? Probably elias lmao. He thinks the mannequin is related to the stranger. Idk I would believe it.

ep 84: worms? I know he says earth worms but idk. Again? Is she making gordon golems out of trash? Martin popping off. You can tell the statements get to him more that they get to Jon. How come martin is so mad about it? I want to assume he just doesnt want her to get stuck there but idk. Jude Perry. The calliope organ. Jon heard a circus in one of the last episodes

ep 89: he's talking to perry? Like jude Perry? He says ... God? Is that what it is? Lmao. The Desolation. Jon is tired of ppl being vague and not telling him stuff lmao. Oh God Jon is so confused. Compel her? Is she assuming he has some kind of power? Does he have powers? Hmm. im agreeing with jon here please jesus christ why does everyone have to be so cryptic. Just say what you mean. "maybe you get an itchy eye" bahasjkdfklsjdf girl what. Agnes saved her? Oh this is the girl from the cafe story? So theres the Cult of the Lightless Flame? They worship whatever entity this is? The Desolation? Why do they all seem like they sorta worship her then? Is Gretchen gonna die oh god. fuckin michael. a different michael aaah. i see. dont do it shes gonna burn you. sir. please. sir dont you dare do- WHAT DID I SAY what did you think was gonna happen hhh.

ep 90: try to make it less obvious you're trying to get fired big T. Elias that doesnt sound like the most healthy thing to do. oh dear is this gonna be triggering for me. uuuuuh. uuuuuuuuuh. doesnt seem like it ok gonna keep listening. Jared. hmmmmm. Ok we've seen Keay and hotner or whatever his name was.

ep 91: Michael Crew. Oh is this the lightning scar guy. Mister jon sir did you just die. No? God everyone is so fuckin cryptic. Say normal things please. They all just like to go on about pain and agony and j e s u s c h r i s t we get it you got hurted by whatever thing. So theyre avatars? question mark? Jude Perry is an avatar of The Desolation? hhhh fractals. thats a spiral thing innit. Yup. messing with your perceptions. God they all talk about feeding their god and feeding that which feeds them and. hh what does that meann. Leave big J. please. uh oh. is it daisy? how come he has the web lighter still? the tape recorder just turns on sometimes you know how it is. So he can compel people? not that he knows it obviously but. a bit wack. powers go brr i guess? If the eye just wants knowledge i guess he feeds it by getting the statements? b/c i doubt it wants him to murder ppl or whatever.

ep 92: elias you all knowing fuck what do you know. (i guess all given what i just said) Lukas. Heard of them before. Mordecai Lukas. Loneliness. The lonely even. Jonah Magnus. Elias ur sounding like a bit of a dickhead rn. lmao jon's just like "i dont care" elias what is ur deal. Why does he want to tie her in. ohh i see. lmao theyre all just like "elias why" The Unknowing lol seems very much like something the eye wouldnt like. lol elias is gettin all philosophical. what does it really mean to be human. this still doesnt answer why gertrude wanted to destroy the archives tho.

ep 93: bahsjdfh he seems so dead inside rip. awww admiral. i love him already. ghh breacon and hope. purple mold. doesnt sound like anything we've seen so far. I think the funniest explanation for breacon and hope is that they dont actually serve the stranger they just kinda happen to be a random neutral party that cart around random spooky entity related stuff. ooooh. when we hear the slight static of the tape recorder it's cuz he's compelling ppl.

ep 94: the end! listen man they were all just grayed up for 4/13.

ep 95: the end also? death but also savagery/ animalistic shit. aww martin. lmao becerra. she's just been chillin in the corner.

ep 96: return to sender. haha minecraft go brr. prediction: breacon and hope? yup there we go. jon why is there an echo. are you in a stairwell? is he gonna eat it- yup. how did i call it. unsure abt what theyre talking about but ok. they kidnapped someone? Sarah Baldwin. ooooh that guy.

ok im just putting this here so i have notes for when nicholas gets to this part. It seems like (from jon's conversation with jude perry) that the desolation and the eye are kinda at odds with eachother? like i guess not directly but it seems like they dont really vibe? so how could be with both. Cuz if he has the heat powers and shit then we know he's an avatar of the desolation. but then why does he have so much eye imagery. also he got burned intentionally? like jude did when she went on her monologue about the feeling of burning? but then why did he wear the eye pendant. it stops him from being burned all the way which seems like he's not fully accepting the fire or whatever.

Nooooo I lost like a bunch of my notes rip. I keep forgetting to save.

Ep 104: tim gives a coherent statement without jon even being there. Ugh. Fucking robert smirk. Dont like him. Joey. Dont recognize the name. The show must go on. Clown. The spooky circus?

ep 105: total war... shogun 2? jon is just understanding languages again. "if i understood mandarin or cantonese" are you sure you dont big man?

ep 106: havent we heard this one already? mans in space? oh no this is just another episode in space. fairchild... uuuh. cant remember. oh! this is related to that! this is one of the ppl from the other side. sounds like a Vast thing. oh he's the one that the dude saw? but that guy didnt have a face... she's sorta like jon. wanting to dismiss the statements. lmao i love the workplace gossip. ace jon for the win! oh cmon elias dont be a dick. sunny meadows or whatever. thats the place we heard about.

ep 107: oh great is it jude perry again. Third Degree. bahahsdkfj she was arrested. sorry but imagining this old british lady getting arrested is funny. she was trying to resurrect him. using the skin book. he's not feeling well. jon take a nap. i wonder if this is what happens when he uses his powers too much. He gets into The Zone when he reads statements lol. didn't we have a burning train car in anothre statement? is it julia fairchild? bahahahs "kidnapped. Again." poor jon honestly. julia... about her dad. daughter of the murder shed guy? hunting like your dad liked to hunt or normal people hunting. oh hunting vampires!

ep 108: melanie has been suffering. poor martin peter lukas why do you have to be like this. can he not just use the front door? does he have to bother the ppl doing statements?

ep 109: how come he cut her off? kinda rude tbh. its either jon's influence or there was smth he didnt want her saying. is it gerard on the table? this sounds kinda like smth from one of the university episodes. is it the closed eye on the hand? yup. he's like one of the students! if the thing listening in is elias then... he can do that without the tape recorder yknow. plus who's to say it wont just turn itself on again

110: who wants to bet its a leitner?

111: Lukas related to The Lonely. I used to not like Gerard that much but i like him more now. but i thought there were 15? ohhh thats right isnt flesh newer? gerry for the win honestly. finally telling jon things.

112: lol "again" no one ever tells any of these ppl anything. tim and basira are just out of the loop constantly. music, like the war episodes. The hunt or the slaughter? probably the hunt. so Daisy is related to the hunt right? basira likes the reading, she's doing fine at the institute. daisy's getting worried...

113: it just turned on randomly. what is it lol. explossives! oh boy. why do they always assume he turned it on intentionally. melanie youre not making me like you that much. which entity is this about i cant tell. lol he was disappointed it was just the end. The title Breathing Room made me think it was gonna be about the buried but i guess not. So many of these entities deal with death but the end is one that deals in just death. it has no need for fancy deaths, just death is enough

114: more hilltop road statements? the tree. oh boy. ok the tree has 8 arms obviously theres the spider parallels. was she taken into an alternate universe? oh no. jon tries to phrase things so he's not asking questions. thats honestly good. "sometimes i was kidnapped" oh dear. they got gertrude. daisy ur so odd lmao. who wants to bet they dont know the tape recorder's running?

115: silaca? or whatever? antique man? meat grinder... related to the meat is meat episode? oh wow. they buy antiques from him. maybe dont antagonize this creature which can kill you?

116: lol theyre all just so done with elias. music? is it like the one band that if you hear them you die or wtvr. oh its chess? i am very much confused. mmm stranger go brr. gorilla skin? oh shit the dance. woah. this is so good. this is so gender. the words are wonderful. "you can just say tim" lmao trying to fool elias never feels like a good idea.

117: except elias lmaoo. oh shit. leitner getting some use for once idk. bruuh poor melanie she has been thru so much shit. martin you can just say youre worried about jon. lol he's so accurate in his jon impression. lol who was that. was that daisy? lmaoo. oop hi tim. oh god i hope tim doesnt die. i feel like i wouldve heard about that? but im not sure. destroying the source of knowledge is gonna be hard for jon. yay jon! you did a good thing. let him rest.

118: go off martin lmao. awww poor martin. oh god the tape gets that squealy quality and its awful.

119: woah. lots of things happening. uhh. POP OFF TIM!!

120: lmao elias giving a statement about jon's dreams lol. damn jon doesnt even get his own dreams? has to stay Watching even when he's asleep? f in the chat this man goes thru so much shit. oh boy its peter. lol martin my beloved. idk i dont trust peter.

#tma #neptune's tma notes #notes #tma season 3

[penelopefeatherington]

BRIDGERTON EPISODE TWO SPOILERS : to quote critical role’s brian w. foster BABY GOT BACKSTORIES in Shock and Delight.

This episode starts with ... not surprisingly a flashback. It’s a Simon Episode Folks. Unfortunately it’s the same one that we read in the prologue TD&I. Simon’s poor mother, desperate to have a son, gives her life to give her husband an heir. I am in LOVE with the way they weaved Lady Danbury into Simon’s childhood / connect with his mother. I think it was such a good way to tell this particular story and how Lady D took such an interest in Simon. I’ve said before that romance novels especially JQ’s can be very insular to the main characters, and I think it was such a good idea for the showrunners to expand on the people around them as they weave this love story. Every single flashback gave me the exact same feeling I had reading the prologue, learning about Simon’s stutter and his father reacting to it, telling everyone he was dead, Lady Danbury sticking up for him against his father. & yes, I cried in both versions. It’s so important for first time viewers to know WHY Simon makes the decisions he does that lead to the things that it does and they did it in such a compelling way. 

THE HASTINGS LINE ENDS WITH ME, is probably the mic drop of the season ( but we still have 6 eps ). 

THE ELOISE PROBLEM. it’s not a problem, she just steals literally every scene she’s in. Asking the whole fam basically about sex. Telling Penelope they have accomplishments to acquire. I’m loving that we’re getting to see Eloise want more because it’s in every single book including her own that Eloise is afraid of settling for less than what she knows she can accomplish, is smart enough to accomplish. She’s afraid of loving someone and losing them like her parents, and the inherent tragedy that came with too many births in her time. She’s afraid of watching the people around her settle because she wants better lives for them. She & Jo March & Elizabeth Bennet would be best friends & co-presidents of the ‘queer coded middle sister’s club ‘ ( they’re all the Main Character ). Two of my favorite scenes were 1) Benny & Eloise, two overlooked Bridgerton’s who want to rail against the expectations set before them because of who they are, sharing a sneaky bad kid cigarette together, sharing the knowledge that they both want more , 2) Eloise telling Daphne she remembers her mother giving birth to Hyacinth and almost dying ( more proof that A & D took on a ton of responsibility after their dad died ) despite Daphne’s efforts to keep her from it, and telling Daphne that she feels bad about ‘ the game of pretend she feels she has to maintain. ‘ 

Nigel can suck it & I don’t even feel bad that he got his ass beat. I feel, & i think i’ve said it before, so much of the issues between Simon/Daphne/Anthony & now Violet are that they don’t communicate in any kind of healthy way. Which doesn’t make for compelling television most of the time but it’s so frustrating to watch like simple things being able to be resolved if someone had just .... told the other person this info.

One thing I love about this show is how much more aware of themselves and their station women are in the show & how they know how to use that station to get SHIT DONE ( Violet using gossip/the truth to get out of the engagement to Nigel ). They’re not ever going to be out from under what the ton thinks or how the men that control their calendars and their engagements and their proposals ( this is a vague @ show!Anthony Bridgerton ), but what they do control & how they use that to their advantage is so great to see. 

WAS LADY WHISTLEDOWN REVEALED? no. SOME NOTES I TOOK DOWN : eloise: are you? benedict: are you? eloise: are you gay? benedict: yeah i’m gay are you gay? eloise: YES! / beat his ass simon x 2 ( abt anthony & nigel ) / WOMEN GET SHIT DONE / colin & benedict vaudville act coming soon  BEST SCENE OF THE EPISODE : simon beating the shit out of nigel berbrooke & eloise asking about sex were contenders but honestly ? it was the quiet conversation between eloise & benny. 

 Overall : 9/10

#bridgerton #netflix bridgerton #shock and delight #bridgerton lb / #bridgerton spoilers / #episode review.

[papers4me]

Fruits Basket SE2, ep13

Back in SE01, ep12, Yuki wished for a warm home, close friends, & knowing/accepting himself. From that ep, we’re watching him reach his dream bit by bit in every passing ep.

-Writing Character plot line:

When writers start planning a multi-character story, they decide from the beginning the broad plot lines & progression for each main character in order to avoid repetition & to distinguish the main characters’ journeys from each other. All main characters will walk down the path of self-discovery, self-confrontation,  facing fears or traumas (opening the lid). However, their paths are either straight forward, or very slow, or full of big setbacks. It’s part of what makes the story compelling. I suspect the following progression when it comes to the main trio:

(1)Tohru’s very Slow Progression:

Seeing that half SE02 passed with very minimum spotlight on her issues, her progression can be very fulfilling once her arc kicks in. Also, tohru’s story is tied with kyo’s via kyoko’s fate. She is also tied with Akito. As tohru is the female protagonist, Akito is the antagonist, their issues/traumas should mirror or contradict each other, & we can see that both characters aren’t fully explored yet. So, there’s still a lot to uncover for tohru. Moreover, due to the plot’s needs & climax rules, tohru must develop very slowly.  I love slow burns so much!! but they can either be hit or mess. The result depends on how executed the progression is. Everybody keeps assuring me it’s worth it & I can’t wait!

(2) Kyo’s will be the Full of Setbacks Progression:

We already saw that in ep 9. He found hope & realized his love for tohru, admitted that he met good ppl who genuinely loved him (all positive progression). He, also, realized his pain over his mother’s suicide, suffered guilt over not helping his mom get over her depression, realized his failure in not keeping kyoko’s promise (whatever it is), guilty over watching/causing kyoko’s death, accepts punishment via confinement to atone for what he believes are his sins (negative progression). The best part abt kyo’s journey is that the negative progression is totally understandable & realistic. Not there for cheap thrills or simply the writer’s wish to present a different story than yuki’s. It is logical & engaging as well. His progression is also tied with tohru via kyoko, so he might take the backseat for a while until tohru reaches the point where he’s forced to come clean & confess abt kyoko (aka the climax). 

(3) Yuki’s Positive Direct Progression:  *i put yuki last so I can easily move on to talk abt student council.

By “direct” I’m not saying that his path is easy, I’m saying while he’ll struggle for sure, he’ll always choose/do right or get help/push in the right time to do right. He’ll win each setback. He’ll be the most perceptive, learn from others around him. I also believe (I could be wrong) that yuki is free from the restrictions of the plot. His story is related to other characters but not tied to them. Meaning his development isn’t restricted until others reach a certain point in the plot. This makes for good direct character development arc which I believe is the writer’s intention.

-Yuki’s arc will consist of three general steps (as he wished in Se01,ep12): Finding true self, Finding best friends, Finding romance. We already saw him opening the lid, realizing his abuser isn’t controlling him, accepting tohru’s help, realizing his big dependency on her which is a huge self-awareness point cuz this ep shows yuki moving away little by little from tohru & finding his own friends/world. Finding true self will take over all his arc, we’ll see more each ep. Finding friends has happened this ep. Finding romance is the last step. Yuki will have his own version of everything he was/is jealous of kyo for. He already got his own yun-yun.

-The student council: Kakure & Machi are the main characters. You don’t introduce a boy & a girl at the end of SE01 & the opening of SE02 without them being major characters. It’s classic anime/show move. Kakure will be Yuki’s best buddy, Machi will be his love-interest. It’s as clear as day light! but this doesn’t make it less interesting at all. It’s all abt the journey. The other two in the council, i guess only exist to push things faster. Without kimi, yuki calling machi by her first name would’ve taken way longer. But thanks to Kimi, Machi is the only non-sohma/important female character with her first name in yuki’s world. One step towards putting Machi as yuki’s love-interest by making her equal to yuki. Remember yuki is still struggling to call tohru by her first name as he feels indebted to her & extremely dependent. But Machi is just Machi. Not Miss kuragi. Kimi did her job. Duno abt the chibi kid tho, lol.

-Yuki’s jealousy/self-depreciating feelings:

I love when characters have negative thoughts! cuz it makes good story telling. Yuki has expressed before how jealous he is of kyo (kyo is jealous of yuki as well, but these two don’t know that abt each other). Now, yuki jealous of kakure, someone he doesn’t have a past with. Moreover, yuki isn’t only jealous of them, he believes that them having a spotlight means he’s in the dark. “he glows with light I don’t posses, so bright, I’ll disappear”. That’s a negative & destructive thought. logically, Kakure/kyo having friends isn’t related to yuki not having ones. He can have friends regardless of them. But yuki doesn’t see that, he doesn’t see his ability to make his own friends, his head is filled with inferiority that seeing others glow automatically means he doesn’t. Yuki learning to not tie his self worth to others is huge step. Kakure does that. Yuki learned.

However there is a lesson here that yuki lectured kakure abt but he himself is yet to fully learn/realize. Seeing others happy, doesn’t mean they’re truly happy or you know what they’re going through. Kyo looked like the winner here to both kakure & yuki, walking home with the girl they’re both interested in & they both assume he’s happy. (kakure seems somehow interested in her/not even going home & waiting for yuki to confirm tohru’s status with kyo). The reality is far from what kakure thinks. Kyo isn’t happily in love at all. He’s facing confinement & is feeling guilt every minute. Yuki thinks kyo is better than him & that kyo’s struggles in loving/dating tohru are unbelievable/stupid. Not knowing the story of kyoko’s chilling words “I won’t forgive you”. Kyo, too, is guilty of the same sentiment, thinks yuki is better than him, not knowing the struggle he has. The lesson here is everybody struggles. Don’t take things at face value & undermine others’ pain. But that is a lesson to be learned way later.  After all learning that means understanding the other better. It means the story ends. XD

Side Notes:

seeing kimi’s design made me sad. How come furuba team never gave tohru cute upper eyelashes! sometimes tohru’s eyes seem weirdly eyelashes-less.

Kyo is kyonkyon. Yuki is yunyun. What is tohru’s nickname?

I love predicting plot & being either right or wrong! So fun!! I enjoy all the journeys all characters go through!

Machi has a story. All stoic silent characters do.

Comedy take over 70% of this ep. It’s understandable as the writer needs viewers to quickly get attached to these new characters introduced late in the story.

#Fruits Basket #Anime Only #tired paper #SE02

[yikeswtfmate]

I’ll hold you to that

Summary: There’s a new message from a stranger in her DMs, but what does he want from her and why exactly is he so freaking cute?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (College AU)

Warnings: swearing; that should be it, I think?

A/N: This is the second fic in two days, who even am I? What am I even doing? What is happening?! My only excuse is that I’ve started this like 2 months ago and only now got round to finishing it so...enjoy?

This might need a second part though, I feel like I need some college dorkiness in my life rn

Also, do some text and ig messages count as making this a social media au? Probably not, since I was too lazy to do that format with the apps and all that?

masterlist // Watermelon Sugar - another part

Natasha is lying on her friend’s bed, furiously typing away at her phone. The chime of incoming messages is constant and it is starting to drive Y/N up the wall.

“You could do this in your room as well, you know.” Turning in her desk chair, ready to start going off on the redhead, Y/N is cut short by a long suffering sigh. “What’s wrong now?” She knows that if she ignores Nat now, she would only get more annoying, which in turn would leave her no chance of finishing studying for the night.

“I’m talking with the people in my group, trying to prepare for the mock trial next month and there’s this guy who is completely infuriating!” Nat spats and lets out another groan, as her fingers fly across the screen. “He says that we should stop defending the CFO and try and get a settlement because it’s obvious he actually did indeed commit fraud. How are we supposed to make a case and win when he’s completely disregarding everything we’ve studied this semester? Of course the prick committed fraud, but we still have to make the case for him, this is the fucking assignment, you pompous asshole.”

“Yeah, babe, I have no idea what you’re saying there, but go you! Down with Wall Street or whatever, but I still need to study for this management exam, so it would be great if you could kindly fuck off to your room?” Y/N smiles at Nat, who finally looks up at her and sighs.

“Fine. I’ll let you study for your stupid exam, but you still need to reply to that cute guy like you promised.”

“Remind me again, why am I supposed to do that?”

“Because you promised, you ass! And your sex life is shit so Wands and I reckon if you get laid, you’ll stop being so stuck up about school.” It’s Nat’s turn to smile sweetly at Y/N, who throws a pen at her retreating form.

“Why are you guys like this?!”

“We both have unresolved daddy issues, now get on with it or I’ll send Wanda in here.”

Y/N sighs heavily and slumps in her chair. She glances at her charging phone on the desk and tentatively picks it up. She unlocks it, a picture of her and her roommates popping up on the screen and the notification is still there. Still taunting her, still adding fuel to her friends’ pestering.

They have looked through his page, of course. They have looked at all the pictures with his friends, some of them recognisable from the halls of college, all the pictures of him in various cafes, restaurants, bars, gyms, but the picture she still comes back to is the one with him at the beach. Wayfarers perched on the bridge of his nose, ruffled hair in the wind, and that tan that stretches from the set shoulders to the prominent six pack (although the bottle of beer in his hand makes those abs so unfair to believe exist) to the firm thighs. She has looked through all of his pictures, analysing every detail and description, still wondering how in the hell she managed to catch his attention enough to grant her a message from him. And then she would go on her profile, filled with pictures from the dance studio, her coffee filled all-nighters in the library, and fair enough, there is that picture of her at the pool where her bum looks just right and she could get why in a sense, but what the hell, look at that guy!

Her fingers still hover over the notification indecisively, when the group chat pops up on her screen.

Wands: do it, bitch

Y/N: I was just getting myself ready!!!!

Wands: u’re a clown

Wands: JUST DO IT

Y/N: why must you attack me like this

Nat: I’m interrupting my fight with that idiot to send you this very important message

Nat: do it, bitch

Y/N: I hate you both

Y/N finally taps on the notification and there - in all its glory there is one simple message that has been giving her a headache since the previous night. Granted, she was a bit drunk on wine, and the shriek she let out when she saw the blinking notification made her toss her phone to the other side of the couch. Wanda picked it up and looked at it confused, while Natasha slumped on the couch in order to see over her shoulder. They both whistled at the same time, which was disturbing in and of itself, thinking how alike all of their mannerisms have become since they became roommates two years prior.

She takes a big breath that does nothing to relieve her nerves, and biting her lip, she finally opens the app to her messages.

JamesBBarnes: Hey

Huh. Funny how such a little greeting makes her tap her leg unconsciously to the point that their downstairs neighbours will be complaining at their door soon. She closes her eyes for a second, shakes her head and mutters a 'what the hell.'

Y/Nwhatthehell: Hi

Now that this obstacle is over, Y/N idly wonders what made her so flustered. He's just a guy who happened to send her a message after following her on Instagram. There's nothing weird about it, is it? They're both attending the same university, she's fairly sure one of his friends is actually the guy Natasha is currently fighting with on that project of theirs. Maybe he just wants to be friendly, maybe he needs some management information for one of his mock trials. Who even knows, so what is she so stressed about? With a huff, she throws her phone away, determined to finish the chapter opened in front of her and relax for the rest of the evening.

She's in the middle of writing the last note on employee engagement, when a ping from her bed startles her into dropping her pen. She turns cautiously, as if sudden movements would force Aragog crawling out of the device, but decides she's being stupid again so she stands up and nearly lunges on the sheets.

As confusion is written all over her face after reading the first line in the notifications bar, she opens the app and stares at the screen.

JamesBBarnes: Listen, I know this might sound weird, but could you ask your friend to stop fighting with Steve? I'm trying to study over here and he's been throwing stuff around since yesterday saying something about a redhead girl who's hijacking his trial just bc she wants to prove a point

She doesn't know what she was expecting, but it's definitely not this. Is that disappointment she feels for hyping herself up just so he can ask this type of nonsense of her? Maybe, but maybe she just feels a little silly for having thought this guy would hit on her on Instagram. She sighs and replies to him, now annoyed with herself more than anything.

Y/Nwhatthehell: why didn't you just send her a message?

JamesBBarnes: From what I've heard about this Natasha, you seemed like the more reasonable one

The reply is swift, and makes her smile. Nat can be a bit too much if not handled with care, especially when it comes to group work. However, Y/N now has what seems like a million questions, and she’s even more confused than a few minutes ago.

Y/Nwhatthehell: how did you even find my IG anyway?

JamesBBarnes: oh Steve has a huge crush on Natasha and we were all forced to go through her every single photo and hear about how amazing she is every single day since the beginning of the year

JamesBBarnes: but maybe don't tell her that 

JamesBBarnes: you know what, screw that. You can even show her that msg, the punk will never be man enough to tell her himself, might as well get my revenge for all the days I've been forced to listen to him go on and on abt her

She takes a second to read the messages again, when a howl of laughter bursts out of her chest. She had an inkling this was the case, from the way Steve has suspiciously been assigned to every single group project Nat had since September. And Y/N could bet his feelings weren't unrequited, for all the hissy fits Natasha has been throwing about him lately.

Y/Nwhatthehell: what if i tell you he might get what he wants if i tell her that?

Y/Nwhathehell: would you be able to put up with him when he's in a relationship with her? He's probs gonna be 10x worse

JamesBBarnes: oh shit u're right 

JamesBBarnes: fuck it, might as well get it over with. At least he'll stop moping every time she calls him an idiot 

Y/Nwhatthehell: you make a very compelling case, James. Studying law must have its benefits...you know, like having strong well rounded arguments

JamesBBarnes: my arguments would make more sense if i would be allowed to study ya know 

JamesBBarnes: and it's Bucky 

Y/Nwhatthehell: ?

JamesBBarnes: my friends call me Bucky 

Y/Nwhathehell: so we're friends now, are we?

Y/N can't stop the feeling of giddiness that starts to inflate through her chest. She might not have gotten the flirtatious messages she was expecting, but this seems somehow better. More real.

JamesBBarnes: if we're playing matchmakers for our friends, might as well be, don't you think?

Y/Nwhatthehell: i think i'll need a stronger argument than that in order to help you

JamesBBarnes: tell you what. I'll buy you a coffee and a pizza if you help me with those two 

Y/Nwhatthehell: coffee and pizza? A man after my own heart

She wonders for a second if that comment will freak him out, but hangs her head with a grin that splits her face when she sees his reply.

JamesBBarnes: only for you babe 

Bucky stares at the screen, unable to process what he just sent. He likes this girl, likes how his first impression after seeing her profile hasn't changed after starting to talk to her. He knows how easy it is to lie away your life on social media, and he can admit he's more than excited that she seems as wholesome and funny through text, and not only through pictures. Following her and sending her that message yesterday was his genuine desperation at trying to do something, anything really to make Steve stop, but he didn't expect to actually want to keep talking to her. He really hopes he hasn't messed up anything, when 'Typing...' keeps appearing and disappearing.

Y/Nwhatthehell: i'll hold you to that, babe

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes oneshot #college!bucky barnes x reader #uni!bucky barnes x reader #college au #bucky barnes college au #social media au #bucky barnes social media au

[thedreadvampy]

please keep talking abt wrestling. i've kinda fallen into this hole recently and, since you're cool af, I would love to know whatever you have to say about it

Well I mostly watch AEW although I was very into Progress before the pandemic (which is a London-based indie promotion that's also basically the feed source for NXT UK) but idk whether or in what state Progress will come back not just bc of the pandemic but bc this year's wrestling abuse scandals involved a lot of their management and core roster so they've had to really reshuffle.

anyway that's an unnecessarily grim diversion let's talk AEW (I'm a few episodes behind bc I watch on Zoom with my pals and it's easy to fall behind while trying to line up our schedules, we're gonna watch Winter Is Coming tonight)

This blog's opinions are:

Women's wrestling is severely underrated and that's the fault of the promotion not the fans, AEW has a phenomenally talented women's roster with a big fan following but consistently gives them no air time, very little space to develop plots, one match per episode that the commentators half-ignore, and only ever one plot at a time. I love Hikaru Shida, Nyla Rose and Britt Baker as characters but there's a huge women's roster of compelling characters who only ever show up on Dark or for a single bout not tied into any particular plot on Dynamite and it's very wearing. When they launched AEW they made a big deal about equal pay for the men and women's rosters and paying the same regardless of gender and fan status, purely based on card position, but that means absolutely nothing if there's only ever one women's match and it's always at the same mid-card position. Sorry to open on a negative but it makes me so mad that WWE, the company which is notoriously misogynistic and whose director had to be shown Asian schoolgirl porn to accept that the audience would find Japanese wrestlers "sexy enough" to put in the ring, is somehow a better venue for women's wrestling than AEW. like fuckkkkkkkkk just treat the women's roster like you would the men's!!!!

on which note, AEW Heels, the Paid Fanclub For Women Who Like Wrestling, is the most half-assed attempt to court the female wrestling audience I've ever seen (and I watched WWE's Revolution pay-per-view where the line was 'isn't it nice that the men have allowed women to have their own PPV thanks to all the men who made this possible'). like ok I COULD give you money to Be A Female Fan OR, wild concept, you could do more than one women's match per episode on your flagship show and not relegate the women's tag title to YouTube

Relatedly, There's Too Much Wrestling. As you can probably tell from the fact I'm 4 episodes behind on Dynamite, I struggle enough to fit 2 hours of wrestling into my week, but AEW also expected me to keep up with Dark, BTE, and sometimes other side projects? and now also Impact and NWA and sometimes NJPW. and then if I want to recognise big names they're bringing in I would also have had to watch WWE which like. there's even more WWE than AEW. idk I'm a completionist and it's simply not possible to watch All The Relevant Wrestling bc that would be like. 20 hours a week and I have a job and a life and stuff. like I watch AEW Dynamite and BTE and that does me.

this is all very negative but I love wrestling! I got into it a couple of years ago and it's absolutely incredible to me I love the artistry I love the athleticism I love the creativity and the fun people have with their characters. and the reason I gave up on WWE as soon as AEW started up is that it feels so much like the wrestlers are given space to play and to find the stories they want to tell.

MJF is a DELIGHT he's like one of my favourite heels he's so loathsome and so much fun! and there's like a really good consistent emotional core to his overall storyline of desperate insecurity I'm so into it and I'm so hype about when inevitably Wardlow's gonna turn on him. I love the resonance of his relationship with Cody vs his relationship with Wardlow and also the extremely strong gay unrequited love vibes that keep popping up here.

Hikaru Shida is AMAZING I love her. did u know she makes her own ring gear and learnt to speak English pretty much from scratch when she joined AEW a year ago and is now cutting full promos in English? also her facial acting? 😘👌👌👌👌

Sonny Kiss is phenomenal I hope they're on Dynamite more bc not only is she a phenomenal character in their own right but when she started tagging with Joey Janela their in-ring chemistry actually made me LIKE Janela for the first time. also it warms my heart that JR, despite being kind of an old fogey, is regularly correcting other commentators on their pronoun use and vocally acknowledging that Sonny is nonbinary.

honestly JR does just warm my heart in general like he visibly struggled early on with getting out of the 2000s mindset on Female Wrestlers Are Sexy Divas and he accidentally misgendered Nyla Rose one time but he's been really open to criticism and often gone to bat for the trans and queer members of the roster. he seems like a nice guy and I'm glad he's here, which I didn't think I'd be saying a year ago yk?

I know I already said this but Chris Jericho is a phenomenon. he just makes everything FUCKING FUN every story he tells is wild and hilarious. The Inner Circle gives me life (on this blog we stan Ortiz) and his beef with Orange Cassidy was pure gold.

Also Matt Hardy is here!!!! I love Matt Hardy, I think his Ultimate Deletion match with Bray Wyatt was what made me realise how fun wrestling can be and he always brings the creativity. He's been through a lot of shit in his life, I'm really happy that he's able to work with a promotion that gives him room to be as hogwild as he wants because Matt Hardy's great strength is being absolutely off-the-chain weird. I love him.

Speaking of Matt Hardy and the Inner Circle have you seen the Stadium Stampede from this summer? honestly worth buying the whole PPV just for that it's wild choice after wild choice for 45 minutes it might be the best wrestling match ever. idk if I like it better when Matt Jackson Northern Lights suplexes Sammy Guevara the entire length of a football field, when Matt Hardy chases Sammy with a golf cart, the whole bit where Adam Page just goes off and gets drunk in a bar and has a brawl with Jake Hager, the bit where Proud & Powerful try to drown Matt Hardy but every time he goes underwater he comes up in a different costume and persona - holy shit it's just amazing it's everything I love about wrestling

Moving away from AEW, the best wrestling storyline I've ever seen is Progress' story with Cara Noir and Ilya Dragonov. They're both phenomenal wrestlers but also the raw power and emotional weight of the story? it's simple but it's heartachingly beautiful I was lucky enough to be in the audience for the second of 3 matches in the story and I was nearly in tears it's so theatrical and balletic???? Check it out if you can it's in Progress' video archives (those are all pay-to-watch though. I think they're also on Amazon Prime for American viewers?)

Cara Noir is probably my favourite wrestler, although Nyla Rose, Charlotte Flair, Chris Jericho, Luchasaurus and Adam Page are all up there. He's just the most phenomenal physical performer and he really gets how much theatre is in wrestling, his facial acting is impeccable and he's not afraid to take hard bumps and really sell. also he just seems like a very sound person out of character (touch wood), he's very principled and takes his work and the wellbeing of his colleagues really seriously which is what you want in a wrestler

[3dnygma]

tagged by: @stvlti - thank you Eugenia!

rules: answer the questions and tag 9 people you’d like to get to know better

top 3 ships:

Nygmobblepot - Edward Nygma and Oswald Cobblepot from Gotham. I don’t recall ever adoring a ship as much as these two, so they’re def my #1 ship. There’s just something about that “us against the rest of the world” vibe from many villain/villain ships that can be extremely compelling. Also given the both dark and goofy nature of Gotham, there’s just a lot that you can do with these characters. I also quite enjoy Riddlebird (aka Penguin/Riddler outside of Gotham), although I do know less about their dynamic in other Batman adaptations/universes.

Mantis and Nebula from GOTG/the MCU. Mhm honestly I’m not as much into these two as I used to be but thinking about them makes my seratonin levels RISE! There’s so much they could learn from eachother and I think their dynamic in general would make for some hilarious, domestic situations.

Riza Hawkeye/Roy Mustang from Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood (haven’t seen 2003 FMA yet, or read the manga). Probably my favourite straight ship hahha. I quite enjoy both of them as individual characters and, as a result, how their personalities work together. Especially the trust that these two have is admirable! I also quite enjoy the role that their relationship fulfills in FMAB. It’s not a slow-burn but instead pre-established with a long-running history. They don’t exude those vibes of a young romantic couple but instead have a very solid and stable relationship. They don’t display pda but you can tell by each of their interactions how fond they are for eachother.....I just think they’re neat :)

(To be honest there are quite a few ships I enjoy to the same extent as Mantis/Nebula and Riza/Roy.....I like them but Nygmobblepot is still by far my fave ship. With pretty much all of my other ships, I just tend to read fanfic abt them occasionally and would probably not create original content for them myself.

Also I tend to multiship most of my favourite characters? Scorpia from She-ra, Matsuda from Death Note (Sayu not as much), and Edward Nygma...Seems like I ship my faves with a bunch of people or nobody else at all.)

last movie: 

Crazy Rich Asians! They added it on Netflix a while ago so one of my friends and I decided to watch it via Netflix Party (which is a Chrome extension I can heavily recommend if you have Netflix and miss Rabb.it like I do). In my country we’re actually allowed to meet up with people again but sadly she’s abroad rn, so we’ve been watching quite a few movies via Netflix Party. Breakfast at Tiffany’s, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, The Breakfast Club, and now Crazy Rich Asians.

Anyways, I loved the movie! I was actually pleasantly surprised by the emotional beats and character growth this movie had because back when it was released, I only really perceived it as a great comedy. It’s still pretty funny, but I definetely enjoyed the family and class conflict it was depicting. Also Singapore looks so amazing wtf!!

reading: 

I sadly started too many books at the same time and haven’t finished any of them yet lol. I tend to read small portions at a time these days and hardly ever finish books in one setting.

A friend gifted me Shadows of the Dark Crystal by J.M. Lee - it’s set in the Dark Crystal universe (taking place parallel to the Netflix prequel show). Said friend remembered me casually mentioning how much I love said prequel show and so she got it for me as a Secret Santa gift. It’s prob one of the most considerate gifts I’ve gotten in a while! The story is very conscise (honestly you really could compare it to a great fanfic) and it definitely made me more interested in the fantasy genre as a whole. I’m reading one or two chapters every now and then but I’m waiting to finish it until I’ve got the second entry of the book series.

Another book I started was The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald. Have neither seen the movie or read the book yet but it’s on our English BA’s reading list. Finished about the first quarter I believe? But I haven’t continued it ever since. However, it’s definitely been a good read thus far! Downloaded it on our tablet because it’s under Creative Commons and thus free!

The third text I’ve started reading (abt a week ago) is As You Like It by William Shakespeare. Never actually read a Shakespeare play in English thus far so I felt like it was about time (my previous literature courses at Uni: Am I a joke to you?). Can’t really say much about it yet because I’m still at the 2nd Act but I’m glad to have bought the bilingual version (English original on the left page, German translation on the right page) because Shakespearean English is still very new to me. 

what food are you craving right now?

Got some sushi and wakame salad at the grocery store today and I’m excited to try it for dinner ! 

tagging: sorry I know this is against the rules but if you see this and feel like doing it you can just say that I tagged you :)

#long post #about me #tagged

[mikeshanlon]

iwwv anon and PHEW OK. I def did not expect that essay and now I feel bad cause I KNOW my thots r not gonna be articulate or right. nonetheless! i think Oliver does qualify as an unreliable narrator cause hes. very oblivious but not like... Richard papen (who is a whole ass clown don't get me started on tsh) but not like addy from dare me(I will support till the day I die that dare me is da like I WILL die on this hill) who sees what she wants to see. 1/?

i think he just... thinks that his friends r diff ppl than they actually r? that doesnt rly make sense but yea. what I mean is that everything the characters do is coated in that empathetic view Oliver has which is usually wrong? so we don't get an objective look into the characters. meredith is my girl like I love the hot popular girl trope deconstruction but at the end of the book she's not at a great place like she's w someone that doesn't love her like she needs to be loved... 2/

I guess the most probable ending is that James never meets Oliver again and that everyone is kinda stuck on what happened but that's soo sad and I really don't want to think abt it. ngl iwwv wasn't like my fave book ever and I really don't understand why people are so obsessed with dark academia sometimes but what i rly liked abt the book is that despite how fucked up everyone is and how toxic they r to each other they do at heart care abt one another...3/

like I rly liked that esp cause at that point the only other da book (other than dare me!) that I had read was tsh and godd every character is so fuckinh annoying and they all hate each other. i was super confused by it till I saw someone saying that it's satire and I felt my mind explode. I feel like this is so long but I didnt rly properly answer all you wrote sorry! I think its a pretty good book tho it has some crazy quotes like hold awn Im gonna look at the highlighted stuff on my copy.. 4/

Were you in love with him?” “Yes,” [...]Yes, I was.” It’s not the whole truth. The whole truth is, I’m in love with him still. LIKEEE PHEWW OK OK OK. WE OUT HERE. that line literally made me go crazy. I'm so sorry for any spelling mistakes or like general mistakes I made here English isn't my first language, it's 1am and I wrote this in the notes app w/o looking it over. so like.. NOT a professional review lemme tell you. 5/5

 Ahh im so sorry I did not see this before I yeeted for a month!!!

Oooh okay first of all dare me as a DA… I’ve only watched the show but like yeah I see the Elements for sure.

Also yeah I can understand what you mean abt Oliver being an unreliable narrator now… Ig my view of unreliable was more like they are purposefully twisting the truth or omitting facts or just literally don’t know shit but I get how personal bias can make the narrator unreliable. I do think the assertion that Oliver thinks his friends are different than they actually are makes sense. He sees James in a very positive light and though I like James a lot and think he is better than, like, Richard, he definitely has darker moments and manipulates Oliver at times (again I’d like to think it’s not the most nefarious thing in the world but like him just being shitty bc he’s in a dark place and he one, wants to do anything he can so Oliver doesn’t figure out he fought Richard so Oliver still thinks of him the same way/bc he knows Oliver would do something stupid like get himself arrested for James; and two, is very jealous that Oliver is with Meredith after Richard dies and has sort of a somewhat positive outcome from Richard’s death versus James being riddled with guilt and anger). And yeah, the probable ending is they never meet but I refuse to acknowledge that so LGNRG. Also that line makes me go CRAZZZZZZZZZZY!!! There are so many great lines, both using Shakespeare and on their own and its like okay give me a moment im going bonkers…

Personally, I haven’t read that many dark academia novels yet (bc for some reason i can barely finish a book rn sigh) but the concept interests me. I think what’s compelling is the setting/atmosphere of like ~mysterious college vibes~, and the idea of a sort of niche, obsessive bond and pursuit of knowledge with a tight knit group of friends (and the like inherent homoeroticism in every single DA elrngenrg). Like Dead Poet’s Society (the film I haven’t read the book) isn’t Dark in the same way most other dark academia is by like, obsession and death and manipulation (though of course there are dark elements with Neil’s storyline), but I think the other building blocks of academia are present there in a more wholesome way and you can see why people are drawn to that idea. As for the more Dark aspects I think it’s interesting to analyze things like group psyche, obsession, manipulation, etc, like what went wrong for everything to take such a dark turn???

 But, like everything else, it really has to be done well or else its just like okay….… I’ve tried to read TSH twice and I may try again but from the 100+ ish pages I read I totally get what you mean. IWWV is so interesting to me bc the characters are all very compelling and multifaceted and I like that they are a close friendship, we come in after 4 years of them spending all the time together and to me that is apparent. Like you said, we can see fissures and problems especially as the novel continues but there is care there between them. That also makes the decision to let Richard die much more interesting and sinister imo, as well as how all of them interact with each other after he dies, and how the roles of the group change without their “leader” so to speak. Also, maybe it’s just bc I like Shakespeare, but I think the academia part of IWWV is so much more accessible compared to TSH. Like I don’t know every Shakespeare play or anything so I didn’t understand every nuance or was like immediately like oh this is from Cymbeline or whatever the fuck, but you could understand the gist of things and it made sense that they spoke in Shakespeare lines bc that’s all they’ve been doing for four years and also theatre kids are Like That. Their pretention also provided any Layers to the story, like the parallels between the characters they play and their own arcs, how some of the lines echoed their own thots, foreshadowed, or they were able to say things through Shakespeare (I’m thinking of like, Oliver realized he loved James during Romeo and Juliet, the foreshadowing that James was going to ruin Richard’s life and that he dislikes Meredith/Richard when he quotes Mercutio at the start “A plague o’ both your houses”, the exchange Oliver and James had onstage and had that kiss during King Lear before Oliver was arrested,etc.) (Also I think the structure of some of the dialogue being formatted like a play really helped make it feel more realistic and immersive). Versus TSH which is just so pedantic and dense and hard to follow at times im like I get they are smart but what??? And maybe that’s part of the satire aspect (or maybe im dumb) but like donna I read TGF I know you are pretentious and info dump abt random obscure shit anyways so erglknerg. Like to me there was a Point to all of the academic Shakespeare stuff in IWWV and it was the soul of the book, and M.L. Rio made it very interesting—like the way that the directors reimagined the plays and had Julius Caesar be like a modern political play, the cool mirror shit in King Lear, the Macbeth and Romeo and Juliet performances where they did them at events and interacted with their environments (which were one of my favorite parts of the books bc I just think that concept is so interesting), etc. For TSH the shit they did literally just felt like “okay look at them they’re smart see you can’t even keep up!” like okay… I felt lost a lot and only like snapped into reality whenever Henry (?) was like oh… murder….. and even then I was like idk what this dude is saying but like he’s being darksided LMAO. And I also agree that it’s just like… Richard being thrown in the middle of this group could lend itself to some cool ideas but its hard to believe that he fits into the friendship group and hes just like hell yeah I love Greek so much and lets go kill this guy other than like okay ur gay and stupid and just want to impress Henry or whatever his name was (which he was but I digress). It’s just not as impactful to me as this close friend group falling apart. Ik TSH fans might be angry if they see this (and of course I haven’t finished the book so my perception may be warped but I also kno many ppl felt that way u did) bc I’ve seen ppl say IWWV is just like TSH but “lackluster” or whatever and while I can see some parallels (mostly b/w Richard and Henry and Alexander and Francis), I really think M.L. Rio expanded upon common DA tropes and the interesting parts of TSH but made it her own and interesting and oh yeah there are actually multiple compelling female characters and LGBT characters (and no incest)!!!

#if we were villians #books #also literally dont apologize for any mistakes or going bonkers like i have no problem n i understood what u meant anyways LMAO #anon #ask

[tabellae-rex-in-sui]

Can u tell us more abt voltaires claim of csa?

I'd love to. It's something most biographers tend to leave out but is obviously a pretty big deal. Also, I'm sorry if this is a much longer response than what you expected, but I feel strongly about this and there's a lot to cover.

And I'll just put a tw: discussion of child sexual abuse (CSA) in case anyone needs it.

So the main claim was during his exile in England. He was having dinner with Alexander Pope and his mother, Mrs Pope. During the dinner, Voltaire fell into a fit of complaining about his poor health (which he often did). In an effort to try and calm him, Mrs Pope asked him how his health got so bad if he's still so young (32). Voltaire responded with, "those damned Jesuits, when I was a boy, buggered me to such a degree that I shall never get over it as long as I live." Mrs. Pope, as a Catholic, seemed to have been offended and left the room.

Voltaire never outright mentions this again and there's no definitive proof of whether or not it happened. From what I've read, most historians don't believe it him (I can't speak for non-english biographies though) but if I'm being honest, most historians don't take the time to actually weigh the facts and come up with a justified conclusion. Some of the reasons people give against believing Voltaire's claim is that Voltaire often told edgy jokes especially at the expense of the religious, so this can easily be one of his jokes. This theory is helped by two major points: 1) Voltaire never repeated the accusation, and 2) Voltaire's English was defective and he made the accusation in English (he possible meant to say something not so drastic, or the joke may have had a better delivery and been more clearly satire if he had said it in his native language). Now, David Wootton does a good job at refuting these points. (Wootton has a whole essay on this topic that I'll link at the bottom of this post as I reference him a lot here. I highly suggest reading it if you're interested in Voltaire.) Wootton points out that although the accusation itself is never repeated, Voltaire does allude to the theme of childhood trauma repeatedly in his writing; and Voltaire's English at the time he made the accusation was good enough for him to write a book in English, let alone properly speak one sentence. This doesn't completely refute that is was a joke but it is compelling.

Now, what are the facts?

Well when Voltaire blames the Jesuits, he's talking about the administration of Lycée Louis-le-Grand, the Jesuit school he attended and lived in from ages 9 to 17. It just so happens that this school has had reports of teachers sexually abusing students (during this time, not now, since the school still exists). In fact, an investigation into the school was done when Voltaire was 14. The report of the investigation instructs the staff to at least not "embrace" the students in public even if they can't help doing it in private. The school was also anonymously burnt down the same day Deschauffours was burnt for sodomy performed by a Jesuit (Desfontaines) on underaged boys (Voltaire retells the incident as: "The abbé Desfontaines was on the point of being roasted in the Place de Grève for having taken advantage of some little climbing boys who were sweeping his chimney"), meaning someone felt the need to make a public connection between Louis-le-Grand and csa. On a related note, Sade also attended LLG (almost 50 years after Voltaire enrolled) and makes similar vague claims: he attributes his penchant to sodomy to the Jesuits and possibly details the abuse he faced. I talk more about that here. There's a bit more to say on that matter than what's on that post, but I'll leave this focused on Voltaire.

The next fact involves d'Olivet, Voltaire's prefect in LLG who was 12 years older than him. Prefects were usually assigned to groups of 5-7 children with whom they shared a room. d'Olivet and Voltaire stayed lifelong friends, Voltaire never really said anything bad about him except on one occasion: Voltaire claimed to a friend that d'Olivet "took pleasure in beating boys". According to Aldridge's bio d'Olivet "frequently administered corporal punishment to Voltaire's backside during the latter's fourteenth year". (But according to Nemeth there's no record of Voltaire ever being punished, of course that doesn't mean it never happened, he was there for 8 years, and he was a bit of a smart ass). Most alarmingly, upon observing Voltaire and d'Olivet's close friendship as adults, Voltaire's good friend, D'Alembert, felt the need to warn him that d'Olivet was a bad friend who hates everyone and "does not love you more than anyone else". Of course this is all very vague, looking at only this, you can't properly conclude that d'Olivet abused Voltaire, I've never seen any historian even suggest that. But I (in my very unprofessional and meaningless opinion) can't help but feel like there's something there. Though I might just be reading into this way too much. In his later life d'Olivet recalls a terribly harsh winter during his LLG years. He reminds Voltaire how the two of them needed to huddle near the fire to keep warm. Now that's a completely innocent memory as far as I can tell, but reading that with the above information in mind and our modern knowledge of occurrences like grooming, it's hard to shake the uncomfortable feeling.

Pearson's biography even includes this spiel about the possible relationships between students and prefects (then goes on to dismiss Voltaire's allegation without any reason):

[Voltaire Almighty by Roger Pearson]

(Sometime last year I tried to find any more information on the accusations and investigations on LLG during the Jesuit control of the school, but I couldn't find anything concrete. So I tried looking up the teachers, particularly Father Le Jay who is mentioned in passing in Pearson's bio. Le Jay was Voltaire's rhetoric teacher (who apparently also wrote the school plays) and really the only teacher that disliked him. Really disliked him. For his intelligence and love of learning, Voltaire was very well liked among the rest of the staff:

[Life of Voltaire, Vol. 2 by James Parton]

This might be entirely irrelevant but it's all I was able to find through the scant information I have access to.)

This is unrelated to Voltaire's exact claim since he blames the Jesuits, but I still think it's worth mentioning. As a teenager, Voltaire frequented Libertine circles, though he seemed to do so only to familiarize himself with aristocratic literary societies since he avoided any involvement in the sex and heavy drinking that was a regular occurrence. One club, in particular, was the Sociéte du Temple. Its members are described as:

[Voltaire's Tormented Soul by Alexander J. Nemeth]

Nemeth later goes on to acknowledge how "his association with members of the debauched Société du Temple would not portend well for [Voltaire's] character development."

Similarly:

[Émilie du Châtelet: Daring Genius of the Enlightenment by Judith P. Zinsser]

Coming back to Nemeth's analysis which I kinda ranted about earlier. A lot of the book tends to focus on his sex life, because, to be honest, it is unconventional. Voltaire openly admits to his partners throughout his life that he isn't "made for the passions":

[Voltaire's Tormented Soul by Alexander J. Nemeth]

And several of his partners made outright complaints. Susanne de Livry (in Nemeth's words) "found the poet's lovemaking as chilly as a winter scene" (her exact word were "Monsieur Arouet était un amant à la neige"). When he was younger, Voltaire usually blamed his poor health for his lack of sex drive, followed by an apology to whoever he was currently courting. As he got older, he shifted the blame to erectile dysfunction. Given that he almost always had an excuse to not have sex, it's likely that that's what they were: excuses. This was also a major rift in his relationship with Émilie, who eventually ended up having an affair. In fact, most of his relationships resulted in his partner becoming frustrated with Voltaire's excuses and having an affair, an affair he almost immediately pardoned: After Émilie explains to him the reason behind her infidelity, he responds "Ah! Madame! Of course you are in the right as usual" only requesting that she try not to continue the affair where he can clearly see (he had walked in on them the previous night). They then kissed and made up. Voltaire even apologized to Émilie's lover, Saint-Lambert. That's the same way he always addressed infidelity in his partners, understanding.

I think it's safe to assume Voltaire didn't like sex and he had excuses ready to go to politely turn down attempts. Obviously, it's possible Voltaire was simply asexual but when his aversion to sex is put into the context of his accusation, it's hard not to see it as a cause and effect. These two also aren't mutually exclusive, he can still be ace and be sex repulsed as an effect of csa. Voltaire initially used his poor health as an excuse against sex, interestingly enough, during dinner with the Popes, he blames his poor health on the childhood rape. There are many theories about Voltaire's poor health, if it was genuine, psychosomatic, exaggerated, hypochondria, etc. Many believe there was a mental factor to it, intentional or not. If not, then it's possible that Voltaire correctly diagnosed himself: his constant physical illness, made worse by present mental illness is due to a childhood trauma. Psychology was merely in its infancy so the exact reasoning behind "I'm sick because I was raped" isn't all there, but he was on to something and communicating it the best he could.

This can also be connected to his sexual orientation or at least his relationship with his orientation. Voltaire was bisexual. I can go into that more if someone wants me to, but to keep this short, just take my word for it here. Despite this, he has a complicated relationship with same-sex attraction. It can be most obviously seen in his entry on "So-called 'Socratic Love'" in his Philosophical Dictionary. He bounces between calling it natural and unnatural, he blames its existence on being raised among only members of the same sex or on the climate, he denies that it was ever accepted in the ancient world, he insists it should not be illegal but should be frowned upon, and he says it's harmless in childhood but a mistake in adulthood. He's obviously confused.

Then there's this:

[The Philosophical Dictionary for the Pocket by Voltaire (this version)]

Where he traces homosexuality to the privilege of "young gentlemen who had partaken of the education of child" and then "abused" that privilege.

Voltaire is also very dismissive of his own childhood, rarely thinking back and almost acting as if he was never a child. Not only that, but he refuses to look introspectively at all. Hell, his own memoirs, halfway through, turn into being all about Frederick. He mocks Pascal for advocating introspection, insisting that nothing can come from it. Wootton believes this is how he came to be a writer, specifically writing Candide. Candide, if you don't know, is a wild story. I mean wild. It's a comedy, but truly horrible things happen to the characters: rape, torture, death, cannibalism, you name it. Candide initially believes in the Leibniz philosophy the book is mocking: that we live in the best of all possible worlds. That everything happens for a reason and everything that happens is the best outcome. By the end of the book, Candide decides this is not true, that those terrible things happened to him because sometimes that's just what happens. There no rhyme or reason, sometimes we suffer just because. He tells his remaining friends to "cultivate our garden". Just make do, don't dwell on what happened or why it did, just move forward and get to work doing something new. Voltaire wrote Candide while living in exile in Ferney, he was sixty years old and kicked out of both France and Prussia. Funny enough, he did a lot of gardening there, cabbages actually. Anyway, though Voltaire still had 20 more years to live, he was past all his major obstacles, for once he wasn't moving around Europe, escaping authorities and making connections. He was happy in Ferney and Candide was indicative of that, he was cultivating his own garden.

[Unhappy Voltaire, or 'I Shall Never Get Over it as Long as I Live' by David Wootton]

I think I'll end it here for brevity's sake. There's more to be said about Voltaire's bisexuality or his relationships as an adult but I'll save that for another post. Like I said, I love/hate Nemeth's book. He's not a historian, he's a psychologist (and I'm neither, so who am I to talk?), so he brings a whole new outlook on Voltaire's life and obvious mental health issues. That being said, when he acknowledges that Voltaire must have had a childhood trauma to explain his adult behavior, then proceeds to cover every possible Freudian base except for the one Voltaire himself believed was the root of his health issues, it's frustrating to say the least.

As promised, here's the link to Wooton's essay.

Sources not cited above: Voltaire in Love by Nancy Mitford and Voltaire and the Century of Light by A. Owen Aldridge

#tw: csa #tw: rape mention #can you believe i wrote this all on my phone? #anyway i have a lot to say about Voltaire #so sorry that this was DUMB long #just wanted to cover as much as i could #voltaire #anon ask #ask

[naazyalensky]

So I hate that Noah was a villain like. Great job guys, making the Indian guy a villain. It was just really gross to me tbh. Also as much as I love Max/Liz, I also really love Kyle/Liz and just Kyle in general. Hope he gets a love life in season 2!

ok number one my notes got me feeling all sorts of emo about Kyle Valenti this a.m. so thank you for that, I haven’t been loving him enough lately. He’s the best man in that whole town tbh (okay maybe it’s Arturo)

but uhhh yeah that was a big :///// mood with the Noah bit. like it’s more than I have the brain cells for atm, and there were some fair points made by various people when it aired about Noah The Villain catching some representation breaks because he’s not the only character of color and how good boy Noah was less compelling or whatever that I found interesting but didn’t all fully agree with so didn’t bother to retain, but yeah I personally wish it hadn’t gone down like that, esp when we know so little about his grander motivations.

like there are compelling aspects to Noah being a villain—at first I thought ok fine give us creepy uncle peter hale of the pod squad—but then it’s like nah he’s a literal monster who I’d stomp to death with my hooves for even looking at Isobel and now he’s dead sooooo what is any of that worth? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I get that how the story was plotted makes evil Noah integral to its telling but honestly I miss making dorky Noah headcanons abt him trying to fit in with his brothers-in-law and offering pegging tips unsolicited because that’s his area of expertise or just being nice and normal while everyone else is dealing with weirder and wackier shit in Roswell as he’s like “you never rsvp’d to movie night did u not get the fb invite”

n e weigh. Max and Liz are very soft and I love them tho I still hope we get a future discussion about the validity of Liz’s anger (toward him and his siblings) even though the feeling has passed because she deserved to have that conversation and I feel robbed. yes I know I’m expecting too much 🤡✌️

Kyle/Liz was too powerful ig. Like they really said here’s a clear midgame ship but they’re gonna be so healthy and mutually fond and considerate of one another’s needs and minds that for a whole minute you’re gonna forget they aren’t designed to end up together but when that minute is over, you’ll be filled with Longing for what could’ve been yet nerfed by the knowledge they share a sister even though it ostensibly changes nothing about their relationship

Kyle is a good man. and just a good character overall. That personal growth???? v sexy of him tbh. he deserves all the nice things, including a love life lmao yes (I’m still rooting for my galaxy brain crack ship of Kyle and Mama Evans because clownery is a game and I’m winning)

#this probably got rambly and incoherent and now we know why i don’t get asks lmao uhh welcome to my twisted mind i guess #tag more later #roswell new mexico #rnm #⚔️ ​weirdos in this fandom who go rabid over different opinions dni ⚔️ #djaqsscarlett #thanks for the ask friend

[arodrwho]

my sibling, who always wants to talk abt being trans & look at pride merch w/me & is very valid in that, rly just said to me that i talk too much abt aro & ace stuff

went like this. i'm drawing cad who's on an aro background. i invite them to look. they feel compelled to try & Guess That Flag out loud where everyone can hear. they say ace--. i say no. they say --or aro. i say ur wrong it's the 2nd one but ur wrong on the 1st, in a let's-stop-talking-abt-this-now tone that they understandably miss bc autism. they say sth along the lines of sorry it's just you talk a lot abt--

nd i say over the top of them, still trying to get them to stop talking, jokingly/defensively, what i talk abt it too much? nd they agree, you talk abt it too much. nd i say u rly just said that, u rly just said i talk abt this too much? all disbelieving bc i never mention it unless they do first, nd even then i often shut it down bc they bring it up in front of ppl, like they're doing currently in the moment. nd they go well nd i go would u like it if i said that to u? and they say yeah actually bc it'd help me be normal & i say well i wouldn't bc actually all that does is make ppl feel insecure nd bad abt talking abt things that are important to or part of them. nd they say well i didn't mean it like that

nd i say like that's what u said n they try to explain themself and i say no i don't want to discuss it anymore but in the future don't say that

nd i can believe they didn't mean it that way probably but they still said it & i'm still mad bc i'm not even the one who brought it up, as usual, bc as stated i almost never am!!!!! bc it's THEM who won't shut up abt being queer even when it'd probably save them a lot of grief from our sibs & mom & the other adults in their life

and like that's FAIR and that's VALID and that's ALLOWED, i talk a metric fuckton abt being aro online myself!!!! all the time, always!!!! that's part of being queer!! and i talk abt my interests more than most folks, both online & irl, & that's jus part of being autistic! so like! i get it!!!! i would never tell them to stop or tone it down or whatever bc i am the Same and also Not That Kind Of Asshole!

but like. that's my whole point here. is that i would never tell them to tone it down. i have been annoyed before by how they sometimes talk abt their interests nd then proceed to not let me get a word in edgewise, but i have never told them they talk abt them too much nd i have never told them to shut up

bc i'm rude but i'm not THAT rude, nd ppl show ME that courtesy & always have n like. pay it forward yeah?

but they're not showing me the same basic courtesy & i'm mad

and like. if i'd let them explain maybe i'd be less mad but i didn't want to hear it, n that's on me

i just--fuckin rude u know?

and on that note i'm glad i didn't shoot back w/ "you're telling me this? you??" which was my first instinct, bc that would've been Even Ruder & inexcusable

nd idk i guess inconclusion i did not like that conversation & am tempted to just. never talk to them abt this stuff again

not that i was initiating conversations abt it anyways but like. ugh

alternatively i could be spiteful and actually start talking abt it tons

idk

anyways.

concluded. done

yes

[smallestclowninthecircus]

Season 4 notes

Ep 121: mmmm tape recorder turning on without them knowing goes brrr. AAAhjhdsjfhjdf "do you mind if i call you jon" its like "can i call you elias?" is this the dream guy with the tendrils? who wants to bet the boat is captained by peter lukas? big man if it killed yall how are you still here. oh boy the tape is doin that thing. who do we think it is? did he wake up? hmm. ep 122: lol jon. 6 months!?!? bruh quit movin big man. he just Knows things sometimes you know how it is. nah b/c i can relate to feeling like other ppl/ things arent real, thats the biggest mood BUT i think it is kinda pretentious to entertain the idea that youre the only Real person. If you dont see a body dont believe it. i'll hold out hope for a bit. theres not a new archivist is there? surely i wouldve heard about that. oh god peter what changes did you make. ep 123: web development. hope its about spiders. she blames him. bruh why. if they hadnt done anything the world would've ended piss off melanie. why are ppl acting like he chose to be in a coma for 6 months. we know this they just appear. no longer "head archivist of the magnus institute, london" now he's just "the archivist" covered in spiders? cuz ik the spider has to do with controlling what youre doing and all this stuff but i cant think of how this connects to that. ep 124: ugh vertigo. is michael crew an old man? oooh. fairchild. how did he know it was martin? hmm. GRR I LOST MY NOTES AGAIN. FROM EPISODE 125 - part of 131. ep 131: bruh he's so hard to understand big man ur voice is so low. Jared Hotworth. the boneturner. "the ones i helped find their proper bodies" name a better top surgeon? our favorite trans ally? ep 132: woo field trip into the coffin! static lol. he says "chill out im just poppin in for a quick recall mission" is the rib thing actually gonna work? bruh it feels so odd and contrived but he's an odd man with some odd powers so idk. rip that archivist ayyy statement time. voices? recordings? are those tape recorders? was it the tape recorders? did they pull him back? i hope so b/c if the rib thing actually worked im gonna be so disappointed. ep 133: predicting the lonely? tundra. like the lukases. hmm. sanikova! like sanikov land. so its the hunt? i suppose? yeah. so daisy's clearly rejecting the hunt, which makes sense cuz she doesnt seem to like the entities that much. wait so are we just not gonna talk abt all the tapes playing on the ground?? no? ep 134: not an archival assistant anymore? Adelard Decker (or however you spell it) i recognize that name. 15th power. i was right there are 15. the extinction? im trying to remember what ive heard. oooh spooky. no i gotta be real i dont understand this fear but i'll believe you that its a thing. ew lukas is so squealy. lukas can turn invisible? oh boy. oooh martin put the tape recorders there. lol lukas is worried he's gonna be an avatar of the eye. ep 135: yoo its the third Daedalus statement! maxwell rayner (reiner? reigner?) i dont know who that is but ik its somebody. is he the cult leader guy? church of the divine host? 4 people?? what? did they kidnap somebody and keep them up there?? oh dear jon are you dying? did he try to See or Know or whatever? why does everyone call basira detective lol. ep 136: he was the one from the spider movie that ate ppl right? the special effects artist? is it annabelle cane? "its a joke jon" lol. hmm they wanted to record the therapy session with melanie? i wonder who that is. i almost wanna guess annabelle cane but im not sure. ep 137: this is the one! he went to the other place and read the war statement but it wasnt the one she took. not the music again. sounds like the slaughter. who the heck is eric lol. "the watcher's crown" like the crown of eyes we saw in the piccrew ep 138: oh boy Robert Smirk time. is that elias? as unhelpful as usual. if new powers can be "born" can others die out? did jonah magnus wear the watchers crown? maybe they were born from our fear or maybe our fears were born from them. ceaseless watcher does ceaselessly watch so. idk what you want

big man. yeah jonah for sure did something. ep 139: agnes!! lol that one dude threw off all their plans thats so funny. BUT this does tell us something. the tree in the backyard of the hilltop house? not made by her. it going down didnt kill agnes. im guessing gertrude tied agnes to the house using the tree? u good jon? cuz every time you try to Know smth intentionally it seems like it causes you great pain. how come he can do it accidentally with no problem but the second he wants to know smth of plot relevance he gets a headache or whatever ep 140: lol pagan exultation. classic. "oh thats my rib" lmaoo. ppl are always so mad at jon and his Eye powers except when it benefits them. they're like "oh you shouldnt do that its not right" and then all of a sudden they want to know something and its all "oh cmon jon its the only way" ep 142: oh god jon what did you do. its interesting she's giving her statement in the way that they do when jon Asks. did he see her in the Coffin? and so he's following her? ok cmon jon you're supposed to let them come to you. lmao ikr martin. "start to hear the blood" "suure." lmao ep 143: lol that awkward moment when gertrude is already dead. big J if you die im gonna kill you. bruh. ayo helen? i guess it worked? ep 144: lol this reminds me of that one edgar allan poe story where he kills the old dude with the weird eye. spooky music stuff. lol thats my favorite symptom of a heart attack its hilarious. so its smth abt the location probably? bro i feel like you should write down the numbers idk. 162830165049 564846474827. seems like the distortion? like the kinda thing that causes you to go crazy because of the numbers. oh boy is it the extinction again. bro what?? im?? his dad just died and he's like eh. martin dont be mean. he's being all lonely again. big man ur pushing ppl away. oh god its fucking squealy boy. ep 145: that almost sounds like breekon/hope... Arthur? agnes. aah was he from the lightless flame cult. a tree. lol he's just ranting rn. hehehe fuck landlords amirite. yay someone tells jon outright to go to therapy. now do it big man. ep 146: oh great! the distortion! i'm making a spiral themed building in mc right now! jon maybe accept you did a bad? nah this goes back to what i said before. they're fine with him compelling ppl when its convenient for them but otherwise its "no jon you cant, youre a monster jon" the tapes didnt turn on. i spose that means its not important? i agree with daisy, this seems unecessarily dangerous. ep 147: is that a tape? the first tape? well that went better than i expected tbh. BAHAKJASHDJKF she did the "can i call you jon" like nikola says "elias, can i call you elias?" damn annabelle is such a girlboss. oh! the one thing from the picrew. its been a while since ive connected smth to that. lol all the other avatars always talk abt their patron so lovingly and the jon just. absolutely hates the eye. ep 148: lol thats the most elias thing. "i just like the way it sounds" ep 149: did he disappear? bruhh. ur lonely powers are popping off i guess. oops i accidentally deleted my notes for 150 - 152 ep 153: thats the cult right? yeah. it doesnt sound like the church of the divine host? idk. if it is the church of the divine host then they worship the dark right? so is the eleventh the dark star or wtvr? it almost sounds like the corruption b/c of the oil or grease or whatever. oh dear what happened. oh its the hunters. theyre so annyoing. not an "it" he has a name. he's a person. is this a page from the skin book? ep 154: oh shit this is gerry's dad! oh shit he quit! oh dear god. jon don't you do it. haha martin. yeahhhh... is he gonna tell the others? cuz you know theyre gonna get mad if he doesnt. oh also picrew connection! the bandages over the eyes? yeah thats this im guessing. ep 155: oh good he told them. oh my god what did you do. lol i have no mouth and i must scream. nah you get none of my sympathy you're straight up murdering ppl. its like the desolation, destroying lives to sustain your own. ok but taking their statements doesnt

kill them. oh... bye melanie. ep 156: lmao imagine if the tape recorder spoke back. oh boy decker! i swear we got a statement from him already. oh god mirrors scary. They're gonna eat the body arent they. Yup... sounds like the flesh or the slaughter, but I'm not sure. Could be the extinction for sure. Smth at the center! Like Helen mentioned. God Peter you dick. Ep 157: peter's just so :/ another decker statement i see. a statement about the corruption? hmm. maybe its not abt the corruption. the extinction. lol pandemics. topical. John Amherst. helen? lol i can hear admiral purring in the background. oh cmon helen dont be like that. im trying real hard to like you but you make it so difficult. ep 158: did they fucking free the stranger? im gonna lose it. you absolute dumbass. im sorry who is that? jonah magnus? my guy. peter. you absolute dickhead. that's elias. (im p sure i had this spoiled for me that elias is jonah) oh dear this is her death. god peter you prick. i hope this is a pop off martin moment and not a "martin you idiot" moment. i hope the hunters kill the stranger entity. or she kills them. furry daisy pop off! yeah fuck you peter martin can make his own decisions. you know that clip from Twisted where jafar says "ok what the fuck was that" martin D: ok like i know its gonna work but still D: D: ep 159: peter you bitchboy. because if im alone i cant hurt anyone else. imnotgonnacryimnotgonnacryimnotgonnacry do it do it do it do it. pop off jon. ok its a pretty good idea for a ritual i gotta be honest. she didnt even have to blow it up lol. oh dear that was certainly a noise. "he gets you" did he not have jon already? he's back! our boy is back! awwww thats so cute. ep 160: oh right this is the thing in the safe house. i love him. "obviously im going to tell you if i see any good cows" martin my beloved <3 :)) oh boy who is this. fuckin. people. jonah you dick. gahh. you can tell he's trying to resist so hard lol. ohh. hehe keep an *eye* on him. altho if the extinction is a real thing he needs to be marked by that right? lol he sounds so intense im sorry- i want martin to just burst in and be like "look at this cow i saw!" its so dramatic and for why.

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