#not to mention the crushing reality that I have done basically nothing in those five years but we don’t have time to unpack all that—

[skyward-floored]

Logically I know it’s been five years so it shouldn’t be surprising that I do actually look older then I do in the pictures from 2019 my mom is sorting through but also. those five years aged me a lot

#I mean I don’t look old now I’m not worried about that #it’s more like... #I just look happier #like I didn’t go through like three disastrous experiences and also have a crisis or three #idk #things have generally been better for me but life was just #easier then #I wish I could grab my past self’s shoulders and be like ‘DON’T GIVE UP ITS GOING TO BE HARD BUT DON’T OKAY PLEASE #AND YES THE DEER WAS INTENTIONAL #that would’ve been nice #sorry photos always get me in a weird mood you can ignore this #rambles from the floor #delete later #not to mention the crushing reality that I have done basically nothing in those five years but we don’t have time to unpack all that—

[strawberrynamjoon]

farmer boy, i love you

– Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

– Genre: farming!au, lowkey e2l, smut, humor & tons of nagging

– Word count: 35k

– Summary: Needing change in your life you decided it would be a brilliant idea to move to your uncle’s small farm, helping him and your cousin Jimin with the daily work. What you didn’t plan was to fall in love with your beautiful yet very annoying neighbour Taehyung, who seemed to make it his personal mission to tease you every chance he got. And what you expected even less was that he seemed to like you too.

– Warnings: includes smut, alcohol and mentions death of a father

– A/N: this is a rewritten edition of a fic i already posted before when i was still writing for got7 but i loved it too much to let it go <3

– Disclaimer: This is not proofread because I was too lazy, so you might find a few mistakes!

Walking the long but yet very pretty way towards the small village that, from today on, was supposed to be your new home you felt a bit indifferent. While you were convinced that it was time for you to start a new chapter of your life you still couldn’t help but feel anxious about taking such a big step.

Moving to the farm that belonged to your uncle seemed like such a great idea when he first offered the plan he had to you – the place held such special memories and as a child you always wanted nothing more than to live there, working on the farm, supporting your uncle and his son, your super annoying yet lovely cousin Jimin.

Now that the idea wasn’t an idea anymore but your reality you were scared and not so sure anymore that this was the right step, yet your second thoughts didn’t matter anymore, it was already too late for you.

The big city you grew up had nothing to offer you anymore – so now, you wanted, or better said needed a cut in your life.

There was nothing you used to love more than sneaking out with your cousin at night, secretly meeting up with your friends, going for a swim in the small lake right next to your house. You wouldn't trade those memories for nothing, cherishing each and every one of them. So, you concluded that this town was the best option you had.

It had been such a long time since you visited, you actually felt a bit nostalgic when you arrived in the center of the town. The residents liked to call the marketplace at the beginning of the town „the heart“ of the city.

Ever since your last visit many years ago nothing seemed different. Basically, it was a round and rather big circle, surrounded by a small café that has been there all your life, right next to it the library that was owned by the Jeon family, the parents of Jimin's closest friend, Jungkook. You couldn't help but smile as you remembered how you used to hide in the library, reading the same few books over and over again.

Opposite of the library was the old restaurant – every single rather important event was celebrated in that specific restaurant, no matter if it were birthdays, anniversaries, New Year's Eve or whatever other occasion there was.

It was so popular not only because of the delicious food they offered but also because it was literally the only restaurant around. Your uncle and your neighbors, the Kims, were providing them with the food they needed, so you usually always got food for free which lead to you and Jimin spending a lot of time at the restaurant, no matter how often your uncle insisted he could cook dinner for you – in hindsight you felt kind of bad for him because the two of you constantly turned down his meals.

And last, but certainly not least, there was the little pub that you never actually were allowed to spend time in since you used to be too young. The Mins, the owners of the place, were very strict about that. None of you and your friends were ever allowed to be inside the pub as long as you were minors – even their son Yoongi rarely ever saw it from the inside, probably because the adults didn’t want the children around after work was done.

As you stood in the middle of the marketplace you couldn't help but smile as the last sunrays of this warm late summer day were falling right onto the pub, making it look a bit more beautiful than it actually was. The paint on the outside was splintered and the sign that simply said ‘The Mins’ Pub’ was slowly falling apart – somehow all of this gave it a certain charm though.

The vibe of the village always made you feel comfortable. There were about 150 people living here if you had to guess and the next supermarket was a twenty-five minute drive away but the people seemed so happy, not worrying about a lot of things.

You decided that a short stop in the pub before you’d go home to your uncle’s house wouldn’t hurt anyone. After all, you were way too curious to finally see the magical place from inside.

As you carefully entered the door you felt cheerful – it looked exactly like you always imagined it to be. Most of the furniture was made out of old wood, the bar was long and it was the first thing one would notice as they came in since it was on the opposite wall of the entrance.

Your smile was wide when you spotted the one man you hoped to find standing behind the bar. Of course, Yoongi was the bartender by now, it was always his plan to work here, to him it seemed to be the coolest thing ever to be a bartender, especially in his own bar – and turns out, he was right, he looked extremely cool behind the bar, washing glasses while chatting with villagers.

For a second you studied him, he looked dangerously handsome. Certainly a lot taller than the last time you had interacted with him and his face seemed more mature, a defined jawline but the same round cheeks, his hair long and falling in his face, making him look almost evil for a seocnd. If it wasn’t for gummy smile you would have had to look twice to be sure it was the same Min Yoongi you spent so much time with as a child.

The expression on his face as he recognized you, the young lady from out of town, was priceless – his whole relaxed and cool facade vanished immediately as he stared at you with his eyes wide open, a questioning glance as he saw you. He was caught off guard, his slightly opened mouth giving him away.

“Just the man I hoped to find. Yoongi, you look good,” you playfully flirted as you walked towards the bar, “I’d like to have one beer please.”

Within seconds he was walking away from his place behind the bar to come and embrace you in a tight hug before mustering you, shortly studying your face to make sure you were really the person he thought you were.

“(Y/N), live and in color? I thought you forgot about us,” he joked, the surprise of you in his bar very pleasant to him.

A joyful laugh came out of your mouth as he walked back behind the bar, opening both, you and himself, a beer.

“You could’ve called, you know? No need to surprise me like this. My old heart can’t take those kinds of surprises anymore,” he sounded lighthearted, just like you remembered him.

Immediately you felt ten times lighter, clicking with people you haven’t seen in a long time was one of the purest and most magical feelings in existence and you were more than relieved to see that you and Yoongi were equally as excited to be reunited after such a long time. Not getting along with your old friends, especially him, was one of the many fears you had about moving here.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t assume Jimin actually kept quiet about me coming back,” you admitted.

“How long has it been since we saw each other?” he asked as he was leaning against the bar, his whole attention on his former best friend, still having an obviously hard time to believe that you were actually sitting in front of him right then and there.

Before you could give him an answer someone else started to answer for you from behind you and you immediately recognized his orotund voice, “Six long years,” your cousin said while he and another familiar face walked up to you.

Jimin pulled you into an even deeper hug than Yoongi did and you felt home within seconds. Jungkook was right beside him, of course, where else would he be than next to Jimin? The two of them still were inseparable and it was almost heartwarming to see how little has changed.

“How did you manage to not say anything?” Jungkook scoffed in shock before looking at you, “It’s good to see you again, (y/n). I can’t believe Jimin didn’t tell us.”

You were almost amazed to see how much he grew, his chin could easily rest on your head by now, something that you would’ve never thought could happen. Jungkook has always been the youngest and smallest kid back then and now he was the tallest in the room.

“I wasn’t sure if she’d actually come. Didn’t want to get your hopes up, Jungkook,” he teased his friend, still nagging about the crush he had on you when you were literally five years old.

Jungkook rolled his eyes at his comment before bringing his attention back to you and Yoongi, sitting down on the stool beside yours.

“So, how long are you going to stay?” Yoongi asked.

For the first time, you actually had to say the truth out loud, making it feel much more real.

“I’m not planning to leave again,” you sounded more confident than you expected, the nice encounter with your old friends almost making you feel like all of your previous worries were groundless.

There was a moment of silence, both of them not knowing what to say – it almost seemed like you broke them.

“You know, I never saw you speechless until now,” Jimin chuckled amused.

“You mean –”, Jungkook started to form a sentence but dropped it, not knowing how to continue.

“You’re moving here?” Yoongi asked, wrinkles on his forehead as his brows narrowed in confusion.

As you slowly nodded his concentrated expression vanished and changed into a grin. “You’re actually moving here,” he repeated breathlessly, more to himself than to you, slowly nodding to himself as if he had to progress the new information.

“Welcome home then, (y/n). I think this is a reason to celebrate,” he smiled while pouring shots into a few glasses in front of him.

Time went by fast and you had fun learning about what happened in the last six years. It didn’t sound like a lot has changed though, they were still as close and as fun to be around as you rememberd.

Every time you looked at them it hit you how fast time flew by, it felt like a just few months ago all of you were playing hide and seek in the middle of the night while your parents had no idea you sneaked out.

A few hours and way too many shots later, you and Jimin walked home, the night sky was breathtakingly clear and full of stars – a sight you simply would never see in your hometown, all the city lights drowing them out. You forgot how special it felt to walk under millions of stars.

No matter how much fun you had in the bar, walking home with Jimin was your favorite part of today, you definitely missed him the most.

He told you a bit about how Hoseok and Namjoon were thinking about taking over the old restaurant because the owners are getting too old to manage everything and about Jungkook and Seokjin being into the same girl, without knowing that Namjoon was already dating her in secret – it was nice that he filled you in with everything you missed, so you could start right where you left.

As you arrived at home your uncle was sitting in the rocking chair on the porch in front of the old farmhouse.

“Uncle Minwoo,“ you almost shouted out as you saw him, jogging over to where he was sitting. Minwoo always was your favorite uncle and you were his favorite niece, much to the dislike of your siblings.

“(Y/n),” he laughed as you hugged him, “you smell like you had a good time in the pub.”

“We actually have a small surprise for you,” Jimin seemed excited as he told you to follow him.

He lead you to the old little cottage that has been on the farm for as long as you were able to think – back in the days it was mainly used for storing tools and electronics that shouldn’t be exposed to the rain. Confusion coming over you, your uncle handed you a key and you opened the small cottage. Stepping inside, you couldn’t believe your eyes.

“Welcome home,“ your uncle chuckled as you observed the room in front of you. A small kitchen, a couch and a TV in the living room, a bed on the other side of the room. They painted the walls white and decorated a bit – it might have been something small but enough to touch you deeply.

You were sure you could stay here forever, it was cute and welcoming, like a real home. Not a thousand words could describe how much you appreciated them for putting in so much effort, just to make you feel comfortable.

As you thanked both, Jimin and your uncle, the three of you talked for a bit longer, the excitement taking over before your uncle advised you that it would be better to catch some sleep – work wouldn’t wait for you and you had to be thankful for any second of sleep you could get.

Waking up the next morning, you immediately regretted the alcohol you had the night before. Your phone said it was currently six in the morning and while being woken up by the sound of chicken and cows was way more relaxing than your usual alarm clock you still would have preferred to just sleep in.

Walking outside a few minutes later you inspected the farm – it was a giant property with two big houses on it. Half of the farm belonged to your uncle, he took care of the animals and artisan goods, the other half belonged to the Kims, in charge of the crop harvest

Starting the day with feeding the chickens and collecting eggs was one of the easier tasks you had to face today since it almost didn’t require any kind of skill. While you were picking up another egg you flinced as you heard someone scream at you from behind.

“Hey! Put the eggs back! Who in the world steals eggs these days?” the deep voice belonged to a man but before you could turn around to find out who was screaming at you, he held your wrists behind your back, not giving you any space to move.

Your attempt to free yourself was almost embarrassing, it was clear that you had no chance against whoever decided to disturb you.

Turning your head around to scream at the stranger you muted as soon you met his eyes – the words you wanted to scream wouldn’t come out as you looked into the familiar face of his, your brain working hard as you realized who he was.

His thick eyebrows were furrowed, his dark eyes were piercing you, filled with a mixture of anger and annoyance – he was still staring at you and waiting for an explanation.

“Kim–“ your voice died and you fastly cleared your throat, “Kim Taehyung?”

His annoyed expression changed into a confused one as you called him by his name. You couldn’t believe he was accusing you of stealing eggs.

“Let go of me!” you demanded but Taehyung wasn’t planning to listen to you, not trusting you.

“Who are you?”, he asked harshly, “You’re not from here. How do you know my name?”

The grip on your wrists became tighter and actually started to hurt a bit.

“I’m (Y/N). Minwoo’s niece,” you replied just as harsh as he asked you, “Didn’t Mrs. Kim teach you any manners?”

He let you go and you immediately grabbed your own wrist just so he couldn’t grab them again. A small pout formed on your lip as you looked at them, trying not to let him see that it actually hurt.

“What are you doing here?” he asked you, voice cold.

Now you were facing him and you had to stop for a second to take in his beauty. As he was holding you, you didn’t really manage to study his face since you were too busy trying to free yourself but now you started realizing how handsome he became.

It's not like he was ugly before, you and him just never clicked and that’s why you never gave his face any kind of attention.

Taehyung wasn’t a bad guy, you knew that because Yoongi repeatedly assured you that he was actually a very loving person once you get to know him.

Personally, you just never really got the chance to, since he definitely wasn’t interested in anything that had to do with you. Not in a mean way though, he just didn’t seem to care about the girls in town, especially not the one who always came over the summer break and then left again.

Glowering at you, he was waiting for an answer. You, on the other hand, didn’t dare to look him into his eyes, instead your eyes were studying the rest of his face. His features were sharper and manlier now, his brows thick but he still had the same wrinkles around his eyes.

For a second you wanted to look at his lips but you stopped yourself, not wanting him to get wrong ideas.

“What are you doing here?” you asked in retund instead of giving an answer, “Didn’t you always say you wanted to leave this place?”

He rolled his eyes as you avoided his question.

“I asked first,“ he insisted, making it hard for you not to chuckle at the very immature conversation you were having.

“I am working here. Don’t you have some vegetables to take care of?” you asked coldly asked before turning your back to him.

“You better get used to my face, if you scare me like this one more time I might have a heart attack,” you added as your attention was back to feeding the chickens.

But instead of leaving Taehyun was walking to stand right beside you, “You’re working here? Why would you do that?” he asked. It never was a secret that he wanted to leave this town, he used to talk about it a lot back then already and, even though he still was here, apparently, he still wanted to leave.

“I’m supporting my family,” you shrugged, not looking at him. You really didn’t want to be cold to him but you were tired and you knew how Taehyung was, he didn’t mean to be rude, he had a soft nature, everyone could see that once they got to see his warm smile but sometimes he was a bit rough.

You could see him shake his head in confusion as you were continuing with your work, “Okay, you go milk those cows and churn that butter if this is what fulfills you, (y/n). I’ll go back to work,“ he pointed at the field of tomatoes on the other side of the farm your families shared and left you alone again.

Walking over to the cows, you couldn't help but wonder why he still was here. He was a very clever guy, he could easily go and leave this town to study and open a business or whatever it was he wanted to do. Glancing over to him one more time, you tried to divert your attention to milking the cows.

The field of tomatoes he was currently working on was not too far away but luckily still far enough to give you a bit of privacy. He seemed to be very invested in picking the best tomatoes he could find, a concentrated glance on his face. And you really should try to concentrate too, since you haven’t milked a cow in years.

And you failed miserably. To your desperation, no one was around when you went looking for Jimin or your uncle to help you. Trotting back to the cows you sat down on a small stool in front of one them, giving it another try.

You groaned at the cow, laying your head back and closing your eyes in frustration. It was only your first day and you knew practice makes perfect but you wanted to cry.

“Just give me your stupid milk, please,” you mumbled while taking a deep breath, your eyes still closed.

“Are you sure this is the right job for you? If you can’t even milk Bertha maybe you should reconsider,“ Taehyung’s voice startled you, making you jump a bit. The grin on his face clearly was teasing, full of satisfaction because you were struggling, “Do you need help?”

“Please,“ you didn’t care about the triumphing grin on his face, you were more than willing to take his offer. Any kind of help was good. And in the end, you didn’t dislike Kim Taehyung, you just weren’t close to him.

He nodded before telling you to wait for a second as he walked towards the little shed. Coming out again he held a strange looking machine in his hand while attaching it to the cow’s udder.

“We haven't milked them by hand for years,” he explained to you as he took your wrist once again, this time more careful though, and slightly pulled you towards the cow’s udder, right next to him.

“Watch closely, I’ll show you once and if you can’t follow, you’re on your own,” his words sounded harsh but you didn’t take them that way. The fact that Yoongi was his best friend was something you two had in common and if he wanted you to give Taehyung a chance you would do that. For Yoongi, but also for yourself.

After all, Taehyung was your neighbor and, in addition, he was a handsome man, you wouldn’t mind being able to look at his face whenever you wanted at all.

You saw the way he acts around the guys and you saw that he indeed had a very soft heart, maybe he just had a hard time showing it.

“Hey! Are you even watching?” he asked annoyed while glancing at you, “I know how to do this, I am not the one that has to learn. I’m being nice here, don’t waste my time.”

You chuckled a bit at him losing his temper so easily. “Yes, Taehyung, I’m watching," you said grinning, “Wasting your time was not a task on my list today.”

After he rolled his eyes at you you could swear you saw a small smile on his face while he started to milk the cow, explaining to you what he was doing step by step.

You tried to concentrate on how exactly he does it, what movements his hands made and so on but you kept on finding yourself thinking about how good his hands looked – what in the world was wrong with you? It's not like you've never seen an attractive man before so you had no clue why your hormones were playing a game with you.

After you started to try milking the cows yourself you felt more than relieved that you actually managed to do it right. Letting out a small ‘thank god’ under your breath you realized that Taehyung still stood right beside you, watching your every move.

“You know, you can go back to the toma–” you started to say before he interrupted you in the same moment.

“Just a tip for you,“ he said, not sounding cold for the first time, “Don’t dress up for farm work. You’ll ruin your clothes. You can still wear cute outfits after you’re finished here. But while working just wear something old,“ he said as he was just about to turn around before you had to take the chance to annoy him one last time for now.

“You think my outfit is cute?” the grin on your face was wide and you were way too amused.

As a response his eyes squinted together in regret, knowing that you’ll probably never stop teasing him about it.

“Please don't,“ was all he could whisper frustrated under his breath.

“What a softie you are,“ you playfully poked his upper arm, “Didn’t know you had that in you.”

He let out yet another sigh, sounding almost whiny but the smile on the corner of his mouth came out nonetheless, “Are you always this awful?“

“Dear diary,“ you said in a nagging tone, “Today Kim Taehyung complimented my–”

Before you could end your sentence he was covering your mouth, shaking his head in disbelief slowly, “I’ll go back to work, (y/n). Don’t forget to churn the butter. The wooden pitcher we use for it is in the shed,“ and with that, he walked back to his side of the farm again.

Just a second before he arrived he glanced over to you again, screaming so that you would hear him, “I didn’t compliment you okay? Don't let it get to your head.“

Waving at him from the shed, you nodded your head. “Sure. Talk to you later! Your outfit looks cute too by the way”, you screamed back.

Maybe working next to Taehyung wasn’t so bad after all, if he was always such an easy target to provocate you'd at least have your fun.

When Jimin came into the shed with the tools to take over a few hours later, you were busy churning the butter, cursing under your breath.

Sweat was dripping all over your forehead and it was seriously tiring, every single muscle of your arm hurt, including some muscles you didn’t even know you had. You weren’t sure if you could manage to do that on a daily base. At least you wouldn’t have to worry about a gym membership anymore.

Your cousin stared at you confused, a sly grin in the corner of his mouth, “What exactly are you doing?“

“I’m churning the goddamn butter. Why is it so hard?” you complained while looking up to him. He was holding two beers in his hands, handing one over to you before starting to laugh at your action.

“Why would you use that old thing for that? We have a machine that churns it for us,“ he laughed, “I don’t know why we even still have that old thing.”

“Fucking Kim Taehyung,“ you cursed under your breath, leaving Jimin even more confused.

“You met him?” he asked while sitting down in the hay beside you.

“I did," you hissed, “He was the one who told me to do it this way.”

Jimin’s smile grew wide as he tried to contain his laughter, “I didn’t know he could be so evil.”

He almost sounded satisfied that you were getting fooled by him, “He likes you if he teases you.”

“Well, that’s not a very nice way of showing it,“ you took a big sip of the beer, knowing that you probably deserved it for all the teasing earlier, before continuing, “You didn’t tell me he became so handsome though.”

Jimin’s eyes widened immediately as you confessed and you could tell he was trying not to spit out his drink out of shock. He fastly swallowed, “You have a crush on our Tae?”

You shook your head scoffing, lightly kicking his leg, “A crush? How old are we? I just think he’s very attractive. But he was pretty rude though.”

Jimin pressed his lips together in a thin line, looking into the sky, „His father died two years ago. He had a hard time. But he opens up sooner or later, just be patient with him – I promise, he is one of the most kind and caring people in this town.“

You gulped at the news, “What a sad loss, Mr. Kim was such a ray of sunshine, always ready to help if help was needed.”

Jimin nodded, “He was. Olli was only six years old when his father died. But dad took a lot of care of them since then.”

There was a short silence. You still remembered little Olli, Taehyung’s younger brother. The last time you saw him he was barely two years old.

“I can’t believe he’s your type though. I thought I really wanted to set you up with Jungkook,“ Jimin broke the silence before you could think about it any longer, almost offended.

You laughed at him. He was close to Taehyung, you knew that, but he always wanted you to date Jungkook, only for the purpose of having him as an official family member.

“That won’t happen,”, you broke it to him, much to his disappointment.

A deep sigh came from him, “Well if you want Taehyung so bad, come to the pub with us. I bet he’ll be there too tonight. We are meeting at eight. What do you say?”

“I don’t want him, I simply said that he is good looking,”  you desperately hoped he wouldn’t tease you all the time about this from now on, already starting to slowly regret that you even brought it up in the first place. And as much as you would like to go out to the pub with the others you had a date with your bathtub that you wouldn’t want to miss for anything else tonight.

“I’ll pass though. I’ll come next time,“ you promised, standing up and walking towards your door.

“I can’t wait to tell Yoongi that you and Taehyung are going to become a couple. How exciting!” he yelled after you in his typical teasing voice, making you laugh out in frustration. Sharing your opinion on Taehyung’s look with your cousin probably wasn't the best idea.

It fastly got dark outside and you were lighting the candles in your bathroom, the bathtub slowly filling up with hot water.

Exactly what your muscles needed after churning the butter all afternoon. Putting a bit of milk in the bathtub, you wondered if you had some honey in the farmhouse by any chance. As you wrapped the first towel you could find around your body, you wanted to hush over to your uncle’s house to check. But what stopped you from your plans was a shadow you saw walking past your window, making you freeze until someone rang your door.

Opening it, no one else than Taehyung was standing in front of it, his work clothes traded into sweatpants and an oversized hoodie, a basket in his hand and his eyes fixed on your exposed legs.

The towel you were wearing luckily covered all of your breast and bottom but that was about it. And, as if it couldn't get worse, it also had a lot of fairies on it – it used to be your favorite towel when you were about five years old. Still, you didn’t need Taehyung to see you wearing it.

“Taehyung?“ you asked him, unsure why he was visiting but he was still looking at the exposed parts of your body, not doing a good job at hiding the fact that he got distracted by your legs. You barely noticed though because your thoughts wandered to this morning. “How dare you not telling me that we have a machine for the butter? Are you crazy?”

“My arms hurt so much,“ you added in a complaining tone, too tired to fight him so you decided to whine instead.

Coming back to reality, he laughed at you, his eyes now looking at your face, “You seriously did it all by yourself?” – he was lucky the wrinkles around his eyes were so cute whenever he laughed, otherwise you would have killed him right there, “You must be pretty strong then.”

“What do you want?” you asked him annoyed before you saw his eyes wandering down to your legs once again.

Not missing out on the opportunity to nag him, you chuckled, “Do you like my outfit?” as you struck a small pose, you had to be careful not to expose any parts he shouldn’t see.

Rolling his eyes he handed over the basket, “Seriously, you’re so annoying.”

You grinned, thinking it’s quite funny how easy it was to annoy him, “But you still think I’m cute, so it doesn’t matter.”

There definitely was a smile hidden on his lips that he tried to hide at all cost, but you could see it reaching his eyes, “This is for you. My mum put your favorites in it. Tomatoes, cherries, peaches, blueberries. She asked me to bring it to you,“ the man said, trying to sound as uninterested and unbothered as possible.

“That–“ you started to gather your words, feeling very touched about the little gift but a bit confused as to why Taehyung brought it to you, “That’s so nice of her. I’ll come over tomorrow and thank her.”

He immediately focused on you again, “No, it's fine. I’ll tell her. She’s kind of sick at the moment, she needs to rest, Olli is not even letting me go near her because he doesn’t want anyone else to get sick, so I doubt he would let you come over.”

You mustered him suspiciously but decided to leave him be, you surely teased him enough for today and didn’t want him to actually dislike you.

“Alright, Tae. Thank you,“ you gave him a soft smile as you were about to close the door.

“Wait,” he stopped you before you closed the door and you waited for him to say something, “Are you planning to go to the pub later?“ – if you didn’t expect him to ask one thing than it was this one. Why did he care suddenly?

“I don’t think so. Churning that butter has really worn me out, you know?” you said, laughing lightly, “And my bathtub is already waiting for me.”

“Oh alright. That’s cool. See you soon, I guess,“ he said before awkwardly giving you a small smile and leaving again. What a strange yet interesting guy he was.

Something about him made you look forward to your future on the farm. But before you could let it get to your head, you were interrupted by a text from no one else than Yoongi.

[Yoongi, 22:29]

Glad to hear you're getting yourself a man! Taehyung and (y/n), how sweet.

You let out a small laugh before finally meeting your only date for tonight: Your bathtub. Though you had to admit that the handsome face from next door was coming to your mind every now and then.

After a week you slowly got used to the daily work on the farm, your body was finally starting to react differently, your arms weren’t getting as sore anymore and waking up early was bothering you less and less.

It was a sunny Saturday which meant you had to gather all of the goods your uncle wanted to sell on the market the next morning. Picking out the best eggs, milk, wool and cheese was pretty boring, especially since Jimin left early because he was going on a date tonight with some random girl you never heard about before. But since you wanted him to be happy, and also because his teasing about Taehyung was slowly but surely making you go insane, you told him it would be okay if he let you work alone today.

It took you about an hour until you were finally done with carrying all of the boxes into your uncle’s car as you saw Mrs. Kim, Taehyung’s mother, and decided to help her quickly carrying her own boxes filled with pretty fruits and vegetables.

His mother was a beautiful and lovely lady, always has been. Her black hair was long and even though there were a few grey strands in it by now she still looked as young as ever.

“Mrs. Kim, let me help you,“ you shouted while jogging over to her, “Where’s Taehyung? Letting his mother carry all the heavy boxes of fruits and vegetables alone is not a nice thing to do,” you disapproved, one box already in your hands.

She let out a laugh and you were reminded of how warm her laughter was, it sounded like the giggle of a small child.

“It’s fine, I told him to rest for today. He always works so much,” she let out a worried sigh, “I’m very thankful, I know helping me on the farm was not what he wanted to do with his life but he does it for me.”

You never really thought about it that way before – that might explain why he was still here despite always hating the small village he was born and grew up in, it was probably hard for him to leave his family behind after losing his father.

While carrying a box full of blueberries you ate a handful, not able to hold back. The Kim’s blueberries have always been your favorites, none of the ones back at home could compare to the juicy fruits you'd get here.

“You still love blueberries, I see,” She hummed joyfully as she was carrying the last box to the car.

“I am obsessed with them,” you answered, “Oh how rude of me – I still wanted to thank you for the little basket full of fruits you send to me. I was in heaven, your peaches were even better than I remembered.”

Mrs. Kim looked at you in confusion for a second before getting a grip of the situation, the confusion vanishing while a different kind of expression came to her face, unable for you to read at first.

“So he can actually be charming,“ she mumbled to herself with an almost mischievous smirk and within seconds you knew exactly what she was talking about. That little shit.

Scoffing, you wondered why Taehyung wouldn't just admit that the little basket was a present from him, not from his mother – who would do something so sweet without wanting to let the other person know? But then, on the other hand, you didn’t understand Taehyung at all.

“Mum,” you heard his voice yell out while he walking out of the door to their house.

When he saw you he froze for a second, “Oh, hey, (y/n),“ he said with a slight and not really convincing smile, it almost seemed forced.

You nodded towards him, ready to go back to work and leave them alone, as his little brother came running outside, chasing after Taehyung.

“Tete,” he let out a scream as he tried to jump on his back. He was surprisingly tall for an eight-year-old, almost managing to get to Taehyung’s shoulders if he jumped high enough, “Can I come with you? Please?”

Before he could answer, Olli’s attention shifted somewhere else. Or better said, onto someone else. To be precise, you caught his attention, the girl standing in front of his mother and brother, a stranger he’s never seen before.

“Who are you?” he asked curiously, studying you exactly, “Are you Minwoo’s niece?”

You kneeled down to be at an eye to eye level with him, shaking his hand, “Yes, that’s me. I’m (y/n). It's nice to meet you.”

He had a big grin on his face, “Hi, I’m Olli,“ after introducing himself to you he turned around to his big brother, “Did you make the basket for her?”

Taehyung shushed him within a second, giving him a warning glance before trying to cover up his story, “Yes, I did it because mum asked me to.”

She let out a sarcastic laugh, making fun of her son, “Sure. It was totally me asking you to do that.”

A heavy sigh fell from Taehyung’s mouth before shaking his head in disbelief, “Where is your cousin? He promised he’d help me picking up our new couch.”

“Oh, I am afraid he forgot. He’s on a date right now,“ you informed him.

Taehyung let out a heavy sigh, rubbing his temple, not believing that Jimin completely forgot about him. Now even more frustrated, he started mumbling, “It’s always the same with this guy.”

“I’ll help you,“ you volunteered determined, not even bothering to ask him first, knowing he’d say no anyway, “I’m done with work for today and I don’t mind coming along.”

“No, it’s fine. I’ll go alone,“ he insisted, clearly mad at your cousin before walking over to his car. Not caring you decided to follow him, hoping that he’d be nice to Jimin if you helped him instead, even though you had little hope.

“Stop being so stubborn,“ you said to him as you opened the door and sat down inside the car, “Just accept my help.”

And much to your surprise, he did accept it, not bothering to start another discussion with you. Maybe he was just too tired of the constant bickering going on between the two of you.

As the two of you drove out of town the sky looked like it was painted in golden colors, the sun slowly setting but the air was still warm, brushing the arm you held out of the open window.

“Where are we even going?” you asked the obviously bothered boy beside you.

“It’s not far away, the dude I’m buying the couch from lives like twenty minutes away,“ he answered, his eyes glued to the street, „You really didn’t have to come. I could’ve easily done it alone.”

Slowly but surely, you were starting to get mad at Taehyung. You couldn’t tell why his constant attitude was getting to you but it did. Of course, he didn't have to like you and honestly, maybe you did go a bit too far with the teasing but after all, you were neighbors, co-workers and also shared the same group of friends. Being nice to each other was the least you could do – especially when you knew that he wasn’t like that at all towards other people. You’ve seen him interact with his little brother and his mother and his friends, he was a warm and loving person, laughing and joking whenever he could. He just wouldn’t open up towards you.

„Dude, you’re the worst. Can you keep quiet for once and accept help? Stop being so rude all the time, being nice every now and then won’t hurt you, you know? You can take your bad mood out on Jimin later.” you snapped at him, not even intended to sound so mean but it just happened – you just wanted him to at least accept you.

He peaked at you, his eyes grew wide in shock at your rant. Even though your voice was still low he clearly heard the frustration in it, “What do you mean? I am being nice all the time. I told you that you shouldn’t wear your good clothes to work in. That was a piece of nice advice I gave you for example.”

You scoffed at him not knowing if he was being serious, “You also attacked me because you thought I was stealing chicken and made me churn butter.”

He chuckled amused as you brought the churning up, “I still can’t believe you did that.”

“My arms still hurt. You’re an asshole,“ you rolled your eyes, not in the mood to put up with Taehyung being, well, himself, when you were just being nice, “If that is your interpretation of being nice I’m beyond sorry for your future girlfriend.”

“Hey, now you’re the one being mean,“ he acted offended and honestly, a bit confused, not knowing why the two of you were fighting. You weren't even mad at him, you just felt fed up, craving at least peace between the two of you.

“Well, maybe you just need a taste of your own medicine,“ you shrugged, calming down a bit as the discussion started to shift to a more playful mood than a serious one.

But before you or Taehyung could fuel the fire and add anything into the it, you let out a small scream as he was turning right with full speed, making you feel like you were about to crash, holding onto the seatbelt for dear life.

“For fucks sake, where did you learn how to drive? Do you not know that you’re supposed to slow down before turning?” you asked him, gasping for air.

“If this is already scaring you, I’ll give you the nice advice to not drive with Yoongi,” he laughed out loud as he parked his car in front of a big house, “Ready to use the strength in your arms built up from churning butter?”

It took you about twenty minutes to carry all the parts of the couch from the third floor to the trailer attached on Taehyung’s car. When you were done it was beginning to get dark outside and the weather was cooling down, making you shiver a bit.

All done, you sat back inside Taehyung’s car as he was securing the trailer so you could drive back home safely – or at least as safe as a ride with him could be.

“If you’re cold there’s a blanket on the backseat, I'll get it for you,“ he yelled from outside before coming getting inside the car, a blanket in his hand, “See how nice I am? So caring, not wanting you to freeze to death.”

You shook your head amused, „What a gentleman you are.”

The drive home was more peaceful, no discussions this time. You looked outside, seeing a big and bright star in the sky, pointing to it excited.

“I can’t get over how beautiful the starry night sky is here. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to it,“ you mumbled, almost sounding dreamy, eyes glued to the sky. It wasn’t even completely dark outside yet, but the first stars were already sparkling brightly.

“Isn’t it the same in your hometown?” he asked a bit perplexed as he looked over to you, wondering how you could be so excited about some stupid stars.

“Not at all. The big city lights drown them. You can barely see some, and if you can, they are not as bright as here.”

“I suppose living here isn’t all bad.”, he shrugged after thinking about it for a few seconds, his glance wavering to the sky every few seconds.

You hummed in agreement, “Except for this terrible guy living next to me I quite enjoy my time here.”

He chuckled, enjoying the little game you two were playing, „Must be really hard to live right next to such an attractive young man. I bet you have a hard time.”

Laughing, you were impressed at his wittiness, “Don’t think too highly of yourself.”

Before you could let him answer your favorite song suddenly started playing in the radio, making you turn up the volume instantly, “You need to shut up now. This is my all-time favorite song.”

But of course, Taehyung didn't shut up. Much more like him, he did the opposite, trying to sing along as loud as he could just to ruin the song for you – and he had way too much fun doing it.

“I didn’t know you could sing,“ you said, giving him an approving look.

A smirk formed on his lips, “I'm a man full of surprises.”

The rest of the drive the two of you were singing along to the radio loudly, having genuine fun together for the first time since you arrived. It was nice to see him loosen up a bit, even though it was only a small step.

Driving up to the farm, you already saw Jimin sitting on the porch. He immediately stood up, walking over to the car, already apologizing without you really arriving yet, “I’m so so sorry mate. I completely forgot. I owe you a beer next time we go out.”

Taehyung chuckled as he turned the engine off, “Doesn’t seem like his date had a happy ending, considering he’s home already.”

“Good for me,“ you shrugged, “I’m way too tired to carry the whole couch inside anyway.”

You were the first to get out of the car, making Jimin narrow his eyebrows in confusion.

“What are you doing in Taehyung’s car?” he asked suspiciously.

“I’m doing your fucking job,“ you shot him a mean glance.

As you were walking towards your home you were stopped by Taehyung holding your arm, making you turn around.

“Thank you, I suppose,“ he said, pressing his lips together, obviously feeling awkward, “Just trying to be nice.”

You gave him a genuine smile, “No problem. Sleep well.”

“You too, (y/n).”

Waking up you were almost shocked to see the weather. Yesterday the sun was still shining while today it was pouring like you never saw before. The sky was dark and grey and your whole farm seemed quite sad, making you wish you could just stay in bed all day, just being lazy, reading, eating and maybe fantasizing about a certain someone.

Checking your phone you saw a text from Jimin: it’s going to storm today, you have to make sure all the animals are in the barn and safe, please. i’m getting food for tonight. see you later, favorite cousin.

You immediately threw on a thick cardigan and brushed your teeth, hurrying to get things done before the weather got even worse. Looking in the mirror you scoffed for a second at your sad reflection – your hair was in a very messy bun and your under-eye circles were almost black. But there was no time to pity yourself right now, you could do that after work.

After you fed and, of course, petted the chickens and made sure that all the windows were closed tightly you ran over to the barn where the cows and goats were in. Your clothes were completely drenched even though the way between the barns was very short, the heavy rain was so strong that there was no way you could’ve stayed dry.

Entering the barn your eyebrows narrowed as you saw that the light was on and the food for the cows was already laid out.

“Uncle Minwoo?” you screamed loudly, the rain was so loud that otherwise, no one would hear you.

“Oh thank god, there you are,“ the owner of the voice was coming out of the little shed you kept your tools in, throwing one of the milking machines over to you. You barely had time to catch it because Taehyung was throwing it without caring if you’d catch it or not.

“What are you doing here?” you asked him skeptically as you sat down to the cow next to the one he was currently milking.

He glanced at you with an annoyed expression on his face - but only until he saw how wet you were from the rain. Right then, he bursted out into laughter, “Why are you not wearing a raincoat for fucks sake?” he asked you, enjoying the sight in front of him a little too much.

“I don’t even own one,“ you admitted a bit hesitant while shrugging, knowing he’d make even more fun of you.

And of course, he did.

“How can you not own a raincoat? Seriously, (y/n), you’re something else. Who on earth doesn’t own a raincoat?” he shook his head in disbelief, still laughing.

You simply pressed your lips together, coming back to your actual question, “But why are you here? Certainly not because you wanted to help me.”

“Hey, maybe I’m not as bad as you think and just wanted to be friendly for once?” he said, acting offended, “Since you’re always complaining.”

“Yeah, I doubt that,“ you answered.

Suddenly you heard a loud thunder outside, making you jump - you usually were not afraid of thunder but the sudden loud noise startled you for a second. What really scared you though was the reaction of two of your cows, immediately after they heard the thunder they let out the deepest and loudest sounds you’ve ever heard of them. They sounded terrified.

Taehyung immediately jumped up from his stool and walked over to Bertha, the small brown cow, petting her face.

“Shhhh, it's okay,“ he tried calming her down before looking over to you, “I’m always here when it storms. Bertha and Marnie are deadly afraid of the thunder, so I accompany them. It calms them down.”

For a second you thought he was fooling you but before you could say something another loud thunder was heard followed by loud sounds of the cows once again. God, you weren't sure if you ever could get used to the sounds they made.

“Wait,“ you interrupted confused as you saw Taehyung pet Bertha once again, giving her a small kiss on the side of her face, “You’re serious?”

He looked at you with a grin, “Of course I am. Go, pet Marnie a bit. She loves getting pets right under his chin, she’s such a lovely cow.”

You did as he said but not really trusting him yet.

“I didn’t know he had feelings, Marnie, did you?” you asked the cow sarcastically.

Taehyung chuckled, shaking his head, “I only have feelings Marnie and Bertha.”

Bertha was walking away from him to the hay he just put down for them to lie down for a bit, something you barely ever saw them doing,

“When I first looked into Bertha’s big brown eyes I fell in love,” he stated lovingly, petting some of the other cows while Bertha was still lying down, „Her eyes are just too pure.“

“That’s adorable,” you had to admit, “Didn’t expect that from you.”

“Are you aware that just because I’m telling you you’re stupid because you don’t own a raincoat or work on a farm with a goddamn Gucci shirt doesn't mean I'm an asshole? That’s my way of helping,” he said confidently, “You just seem to not know exactly what to do, so I’m trying to help.”

„You're still being mean while doing it,“ you insisted, not giving in.

“Whatever,“ he walked over to Bertha, who was resting on the ground, lying down next to her, “Just go inside and relax, I’ll take care of the cows.”

“No way,“ you sat down next to him, “I’ll not leave you alone with my cows. I don’t trust you.”

Of course, that was only an excuse to spend some time with the pretty boy from next door but he didn't need to know – his ego was big enough already. Both of you were now starting to relax slowly, leaning against Bertha, petting her every now and then.

“So, farmer girl, how do you like it here?” he asked you after a few seconds of silence, seeming to be actually interested in you for once.

“It’s nice,“ you shrugged as he was peaking over at you, “I like the fact that I finally am allowed to go into the pub the most.”

“I remember when we first were allowed to go in, it was like Harry Potter seeing Hogwarts for the first time,“ he remembered laughing, “and now we’re the ones that get drunk in there while the younger kids are jealous they can’t.”

“Some things never change, right?“ your eyes darted to Taehyung, who had his eyes closed and seemed to be truly relaxed in your presence for the first time since you arrived. He was using his arm as a pillow, a smile on his lips - for once a genuine smile, not the usual teasing one he gave you. The rain was pouring so hard onto the roof of the barn it sounded like applause. You couldn’t help but smile to yourself, exhaling a breathy scoff through your nose, not believing that he actually had a soft side.

“What's so funny?“ he asked curiously, still with closed eyes.

“I just love the sound of heavy rain,”  you lied, also getting into a comfortable position and closing your eyes.

Your neighbour let out a hum, agreeing with you before yawning, “Me too. It’s cozy.”

Your eyelids started to feel heavy, you didn’t have much sleep last night and your body was shivering a bit because of your wet clothes. Taehyung was snoring lightly beside you within a few minutes and before you knew it you were asleep too. You wouldn’t have expected the barn to be such a comfortable place to sleep in.

The sound of someone calling your name, you couldn't quite identify who it belonged to yet, woke you up. As you were slowly starting to realize where you were, you were just as perplexed as Taehyung, who was still beside you, seeming to just have woken up too, according to his dreamy gaze.

“Did we fall asleep?” he asked you, yawning and stretching his arms from his body.

As you looked up, Jimin was standing in front of both of you, confusion was written all over his face, “What the hell are you two doing in here? How do I keep finding you two together?”

Taehyung shrugged, sitting up as you were doing the same, “What does it look like? We obviously fell asleep.”

“Okay but why were you here together in the first place?” he asked, a smirk on his lips, “Did you make out in front of the cows? They are too young to be exposed to such wild and unholy behavior.”

Chuckling at his remark, you rubbed your eyes a bit, “Don't be noisy, please. I’m having a headache.”

“You two are just too cute,“ he teased a bit before telling you the reason he was looking for you in the first place, “Dinner’s ready. We’re having some meat with different salads and corn. Feel free to join us Tae, your mum and Olli are there too.”

“I don’t know,“ he replied, a little unsure, “I still wanted to meet up with Namjoon and Hoseok later.”

Jimin narrowed his eyebrows, “Why didn’t you ask me to join, you jerk?”

Taehyung laughed at Jimin, standing up, surprisingly offering you a hand to help you get up from the ground, “I’ll eat dinner with you and then you can come with me, alright?“ he proposed to Jimin.

Your cousin agreed happily and the three of you walked over to the big house Minwoo and Jimin lived in.

“Did you find her?” your uncle screamed from the kitchen as he heard the door open.

“Yes, I’m here,“ you shouted back as you took off your shoes.

Walking over to them, Mrs. Kim was surprised to see her son, “Oh, Tae. How lovely that you’re here,“ she smiled as cute as always, “Where have you been?”

Both, Taehyung and you felt a bit awkward telling them where exactly Jimin found them, not wanting anyone to get a wrong idea. But, of course, your annoying cousin was faster.

“They were sleeping in the barn together,“ he smirked as he told your family, enjoying every minute of it, “You two seem to get along better by now.”

Taehyung rolled his eyes, “We were literally just taking care of the cows.”

You nodded, “It’s not like we met to take a nap in the barn.”

Uncle Minwoo and Mrs. Kim both giggled a bit at the bickering between their families, “Stop teasing them. They are already flustered,“ she said lightheartedly.

Everyone sat down on the table as your uncle brought the food to the table. It smelled like you were sitting in a restaurant and you could feel your mouth watering as you saw the food.

“Thank you for letting us eat with you,“ Taehyung said in a polite manner.

“Oh, Tae!” Minwoo exclaimed joyfully, “You’re always welcome. We’re like family.”

He nodded thankful as all of you started eating. The food was truly delicious and the conversation was nice, all of you participating in it, talking about current events and life on the farm.

You weren't sure if it was because your families were there but Taehyung was unusually nice to you, not even nagging you once. He passed you the salt when you asked him to and he even asked you about your job back at home.

It was a nice evening and you cherished it, knowing that it probably was a once in a lifetime experience to have a normal, peaceful conversation with Taehyung in the same room as you.

About an hour later you started walking from the big house to the small hut and even if it only took a minute or two Taehyung walked right beside you, not leaving your side.

Maybe he truly wasn't as bad as you made him out to be – the two of you might have had some difficulties but thinking about it now he seemed to open up to you more and more. As both of you stood in front of your door, you fiddled with your hands, not knowing how to react to being all alone with him.

“Don’t let Jimin drink too much tonight. I need him to be fit tomorrow. It’s my day off,“ you joked.

“I promise to stop him if he drinks too much,“ he smiled brightly, the wrinkles around his eyes showing slightly, “I’ll see you around?”

A scoff escaped your lips before you could hold it back, “Considering the fact that you can look inside my living room from your window I think so yes.”

And with that, he started walking towards his house but even after he was gone you still couldn't stop smiling.

The few next weeks were pretty unspectacular, working on the farm was part of your everyday life by now and your work was a routine, knowing every small step of it.

But still, today you woke up with a smile plastered on your face – it’s not like anyone besides Jimin and Minwoo, maybe Yoongi, would know it’s your birthday today but you still loved your special day.

It didn't matter that no one would know, you were quite happy that to everyone else this day would be just another day. You, on the other hand, had tons of self-care plans for tonight.

The first thing you did that morning was checking your phone, happy to see that your friends from home – or more like what used to be home to you – thought of you and send you very nice birthday greetings full of love, telling you that they missed you. In no time you got up and dressed to go over to the main house.

“So, what do you want to do today?” Jimin asked you as you had breakfast with him and your uncle. Despite you telling them that they shouldn't worry about you, they still made you some scrambled eggs and cut a lot of the vegetables from the Kim’s farm, Jimin even managed to go to the heart of the city to buy some buns for all of you.

Stretching yourself, tiredness still washing over you, you thought about his question. “I actually don’t know, I thought I'd just do some sheet masks later and watch Netflix,” you said shrugging before eating a piece of cucumber, “Why? Any ideas?”

“Why don’t you invite your friends over, (y/n)?” your uncle suggested but you’d rather not. The problem with inviting people over is you can’t leave early since they are literally at your own place and you'd never kick them out, not wanting to be unfriendly.

“No way, I don’t even think most people know about my birthday. I’ll stay lowkey about it,“  you denied your uncle's request, just wanting to have a nice night on the couch after you took a long bath – an ideal night for you.

“Why don't we have a movie night?” you suggested to your two family members but they didn’t seem to show much support to your idea.

Uncle Minwoo immediately stopped you, “I’m not letting you stay at home with your old uncle and cousin on your birthday.”

“I’d love that though. We hadn’t had a movie night in a long time,“ you pouted, hoping to convince your uncle despite knowing you had no chance against him.

“Jimin, take her to the pub, alright?” he instructed his son who was currently not listening to the conversation and instead was texting someone.

“Sure,“ he agreed with his father before looking up from his phone, “I’ll take you to the pub later, (y/n). No discussion.”

So a few hours later you found yourself in your small bathroom, putting on a real full face make-up for the first time ever since you moved here, you almost forgot how pretty you could be.

Jimin said to make sure that you looked your best since a lot of other people would be there, including the girl he ‘sometimes takes out’, as he liked to call it.

Even though you were still not fully in the mood, you started to warm up to the idea of going out as you got ready. In the end, you knew it wouldn't hurt to doll yourself up and go out every now and then – and maybe, just maybe, Taehyung would be there too.

Jimin picked you up from your place at around eight in the evening, the sky already pitch-black.

“Hey birthday kid,“ he said lovingly, “I didn't know you could look this lovely. Trying to impress a certain boy?”

Throwing him a glare that was about to end his life you were ready to hit your cousin if he wouldn’t stop mentioning your attraction towards your neighbor. You prayed he didn’t tell Tae about it, his ego was big enough and you didn’t know if you could survive if he’d become even cockier. Taehyung knew how handsome he was and that he could probably get just any girl if he wanted already so you didn't want to give him the satisfaction.

“I’ll kill you if you don’t shut your mouth,“ you threatened him even though you knew that nothing could stop Jimin's teasing ever.

Arriving at the Pub, you couldn’t help but grin like an idiot – all of your friends were waiting inside, a whole booth decorated just for you. Yoongi was the first to welcome you, hugging you tightly. “Happy Birthday, princess,“ he almost whispered into your ear before the other people were waiting for their turn to congratulate you.

Hoseok and Namjoon were there, including Namjoon’s girlfriend, that you hadn’t met before. Jungkook, of course, was there too and even gifted you some sunflower. “Those are my favorite!” you told him excited, to which he replied that he still remembered.

Jimin introduced you to his almost-girlfriend and she seemed to be a nice girl, a bit smaller than him, with cute glasses, short hair and a nose ring that she pulled off like no one else could.

And last but not least Kim Taehyung was standing in front of you, trying to look cold and unbothered like always, but his eyes were sparkling a bit, giving away that he wasn't as cool as he wanted to be.

“You’re here!” you gasped, genuinely excited to see him, “I feel honored.”

He shook his head joyful. “Don’t let it get to your head. Happy birthday, farmer girl,“ for the first time ever Taehyung hugged you, and you hated to admit that it felt quite comforting – the hug didn’t feel awkward or forced at all, he even had his hand on your head, right in your hair.

Yoongi and Jimin, who were standing behind Taehyung, were inspecting the hug you shared, drawing hearts with their fingers in the air for only you to see as you turned red.

“(Y/n), we got a present for you! Come on, sit down,” Hoseok happily singsang from the table and Taehyung let you go, way too early for your liking, but you weren’t complaining – you appreciated what you got this far.

As you sat down beside Yoongi, Taehyung sat right next to you, pretty close since you were sitting on a small bank with five people.

The booth was decorated with a paper chain that spelled “Happy Birthday”, a few presents were waiting for you on the table, right next to many glasses and several bottles of alcohol.

“This one is from me, Hoseok and Seokjin,“ Namjoon said excited, handing you a present.

Opening it you couldn’t help but pout at their heartwarming idea: They gifted you a framed picture the four of you when you were little, you were maybe around three to four years old.

„God, we were so small,“ you chuckled, studying the picture.

Hoseok smiled wholeheartedly, “There’s a little wheel on the side that you have to move,“ he explained and so you did – as you turned the little wheel more pictures of your friends and you appeared, all of them from different years.

“I love it,“ you smiled at them, “I'll find a special place to display it, I promise.”

“Open our’s next,“ Yoongi said, an untrustworthy smirk on his face. “It’s from me and Jimin.”

Just because you knew the two of you too well, you didn’t trust them at all.

“I bet it’ll get also a very, very special place at your home,“ Jimin assured you and you just knew at that point they probably got you something very stupid.

And they did – you let out a deep breath, shaking your head in disbelief.

“Thanks, I really needed that,“ you said sarcastically as you hold the box of the vibrator they gifted you in your hand.

Both of the boys bursted out into laughter, making you sigh.

„You think you're so funny, don't you? How old are you? Fourteen?“ you snipped both of their foreheads but still, a chuckle managed to slip out. Not really because you thought the present was funny but more because the boys were so amused by their own idea.

“We know the nights get lonely here,“ Jimin said, still laughing like a teenager, “Much fun with it. Just call Taehyung if you need any help with it.”

“Yeah, no, thanks, I think I can handle that on my own,“ you quickly responded before anyone else could join their nagging, “I really need a shot now. Otherwise, I won't be able to deal with you.”

Yoongi immediately poured a round of shots for everyone, “To our little (y/n).”

All of your friends clinked glasses and downed the shot. Within a few hours, one shot became quite a few, too many to count them. Jimin and his girl were making out heavily in the corner of the pub – much to your disgust. While you were happy for your cousin you still could imagine better things than seeing your family member's tongue in someone's mouth.

Yoongi, you, Seokjin, Namjoon and Taehyung were currently playing a card drinking game that you not only never heard of before but was also killing you at a fast pace.

“(Y/n), your turn,“ Taehyung glanced at you, raising his eyebrow – his cheeks were red and the sloppy smile on his face gave away that he also was at least a bit intoxicated by now, “Red or black?”

That was the whole point of the game, basically the only rule. You had to say a color and if the card didn’t have the color you had to take a shot. Seokjin said it was the best game to get really drunk really fast, and boy, he was right.

“Red”, you answered or to be exact, mumbled since you had a hard time pronouncing your words clearly by now.

And, of course, luck wasn’t on your side - as Taehyung turned around the card it showed black. “Tae~“ you let out a whine as he laughed, “I literally cannot drink this shot or else I’ll throw up.”

Your head was turning and your stomach felt warm and tingly, a part of you suddenly felt playful and giggly, which was pretty unusual for you. Looking at Taehyung you felt something deep down in your stomach – the way his rather long and curly hair fell into his face and his tanned skin was glowing was a beautiful sight. God, you really wanted to blame it on the booze but deep down you were aware that you were just fooling yourself.

“You’re no fun,“ he almost whined before taking the shot, “I’ll take it for you since it’s your birthday.”

“Oh, what a gentleman you are,“ you nudged him.

“Just trying to get drunk,“ he shrugged laughing before downing the shot as if it was nothing.

Your glance waved over to Jungkook, who was e the drunkest, his eyes slowly closing. “Jungkook!” you poked his upper arm, not sure if you should laugh or be concerned, “Are you passing out?”

“Hmm?” he responded, trying to open his eyes but failing, “Oh no. I’m just taking a nap.”

You peeked to Taehyung beside you, questioning him what to do, “Are you going to babysit him?”

He scoffed, “That isn’t my problem to deal with.”

About two hours later you decided that it was time to go home, having to admit that you did have fun despite wanting to stay home at first. You thanked everyone and grabbed your bag.

“What about you?” you asked Taehyung who was sitting on his phone, texting someone with his eyebrows furrowed, “You’re staying?”

His eyes met yours as he looked up from his phone, “No, I’m walking you home. Give me a second.”

You decided to wait outside, in need of some fresh air to sober you up.

Slowly, you started to walk towards your home, knowing Taehyung would be able to catch up in no time. And he did, of course.

“Oh!” he looked at you with wide eyes as he arrived by your side, before opening his bag, looking for something, “It’s your birthday!”

“No shit, Sherlock,“ you responded unimpressed at his sudden realization, walking through the little city at night, still not used to how beautiful the stars were here, „You just got that now?“

“No, wait. I actually got you something,“ the boy mumbled and you thought you heard wrong for a second. At least until Taehyung handed you a box, a rather big one.

“Are you serious?” you asked surprised, suddenly feeling shy. This morning you were convinced he didn’t even know it was your birthday but now he was standing in front of you, with a present that was neatly wrapped in yellow wrapping paper.

“Don’t make a big deal out of it, please,“ he chuckled as you two walked through the dark night, only a few lanterns on your way home, “Just open it. It felt wrong not to get you anything. I mean, we’re neighbors now, and also co-workers.”

Your arm nudged him, playfully asking, “Maybe even friends?”

His laugh seemed to be even louder and happier when he’s drunk, “Says who? You wish!” before immediately adding, “I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Maybe even that. Now open it. Let’s sit down.“

Your neighbor gestured at the bank on the side of the way, a few steps away.

He took out his phone to turn on the flashlight so you could see, sitting dangerously close to you. “Why didn’t you give it to me earlier?” you asked him curiously.

“You know, I gotta keep my cool reputation in front of them,“ he joked.

“Ah, can’t let them know that you have a crush on me?” you blurted out, trying to flirt, knowing you would never say those things if it wasn’t for all the shots you drank earlier.

“You’re a pain in the ass,“ he mocked you a bit, “Will you please just open it now? There are a few smaller things.”

As you ripped open the wrapping paper you let out a laugh, impressed by his first present, “A raincoat? I could’ve seen that one coming.”

“I still can’t believe you don’t own one. Look underneath, there’s also a shirt you can use for work so you won’t ruin your good clothes,“ he said, almost proud of his idea and it was adorable.

The shirt was grey and oversized - and also, there was a picture printed onto it. Taehyung let out another laugh, covering his mouth with his hand to stop him from laughing harder, before you could see what was on it.

As he shined his flashlight on the picture you were not only extremely amused but also very amazed that he did that for you, even though he obviously was trying to be funny, you genuinely liked it – the picture was a selfie of Taehyung, giving a thumbs up, right next to his favorite being on this earth, Bertha. Underneath the picture the sentence ‘(Y/n), you can do it. I hope.’ was written in big letters.

“You’re seriously the worst,“ you joined his laughter, wondering how in the hell he got this idea. The atmosphere was almost friendly – a new step for the two of you. Not that you didn’t like him before, you just thought that he didn’t like you back.

“I think you’ll look quite good in it, (y/n),“ he smiled proudly, definitely satisfied with himself.

“You’re such a flirt,“ you said sarcastically.

The last gift in the box really got to you though - it immediately brought back a lot of memories, cherished ones, of your childhood. An overwhelming rush of sentiment came over you as you couldn't believe your eyes.

“Tae, I–” you were looking for the right words to say but none came to your head, “Is it what I think it is?”

“If you think it’s your old music box that played Somewhere Over The Rainbow over and over again, then it is, yes,“ he replied, playing it cool as if it wasn't a big thing.

You totally forgot about it until now, back in the day you always used to play it before going to bed, falling asleep immediately to the soothing sound of it – back then it didn't matter where you were: you wouldn't fall asleep without the petite woodbox playing your favorite song.

“Where did you even get this?“ you asked him, gulping.

“Oh, Minwoo gave it to me to calm the cows on thunder days,“ he said amused.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,“ you chuckled, still inspecting the music box. It seemed to be even prettier than you remembered it.

“Do you like it?” he asked, turning towards you, “I know how obsessed you were with it as a child so I thought you’d like to have it back. The cows didn’t like it anyway.”

Your eyes met his, not knowing what to say. He was so cool about it when to you, this might be one of the most meaningful presents you've gotten in a long time. The fact that he even remembered how in love you were with this music box and how thoughtful of him it was to give it back to you. Slowly you put the box down, still feeling a bit overwhelmed. It was probably stupid, for him it was just a simple present and you were overreacting, right? But still, it was so much more than you would’ve expected. Especially from him

“I love it,“ you assured him, the wrinkles around his eyes deeper than you’ve ever seen them before. “Thank you so much.”

Before he could say something to ruin the moment you wrapped your arms around his neck and buried your face in his collar. It took him a few moments to realize what was happening, a hug was something he didn’t expect at all, but it did feel nice. His arms carefully found your waist and hugged you back.

You could see how red his cheeks were as your hug ended but for once you decided to not tease him, not wanting to ruin a genuinely nice moment. The two of you didn’t have those very often.

“Shall we go home?” Taehyung asked softly as he stood up, waiting for you to join him.

The two of you were walking for a while, way slower than usual. It might be the alcohol in your veins or simply the secret desire to spend some more time together, alone and outside of the farm.

“Be honest,“ you started carelessly, it almost sounded like you were singing it, “You do think I’m cute.”

Looking up to Taehyung you saw that he was smiling and didn’t seem to care about your teasing anymore.

“I do think you’re cute. That doesn’t make you less any annoying though,“ he replied, his tone almost playful. As you were walking your shoulders were lightly brushing every now and then, a rush of excitement going through your body every single time.

“Now you be honest. You were totally checking me out when you saw me on the day you moved here,“ he countered, the conversation light.

You let out a small scoff, “I maybe would have if I hadn’t been to busy trying to free myself from your grip since you thought I was stealing your chicken,“ you snapped at him and Taehyung let out a laugh at that memory. Even though it wasn’t long ago it felt like years, considering how much your relationship developed since then.

“Your turn. You would’ve gone home sooner but you were waiting to walk me home,“ the vibe Taehyung gave you told you it was okay to dig a bit deeper.

“Now you’re just being overconfident, (y/n),“ he laughed and you thought about how his laugh is so different than his mum’s. His mother's laugh was light and charming while his laugh was deep and full of joy, almost bold and loud.

“If you say I’m wrong you’re lying,“ you insisted while looking up to the beautiful night sky, not letting loose. Even though you were a bit cold you didn’t really care, you could walk and talk for a few more hours without complaining.

“I never said you’re wrong,“ he answered quietly, now more soft and serious, “But don’t let it get to your head, I know my mum would kill me if she heard that you had to walk home alone.”

“You’re so in love with me dude, how gross,“ you joked, not able to stop your usual nagging.

By now it seemed like that was Taehyung’s and your’s thing somehow. It was an open secret that there was something between the two of you, whatever that was. Maybe, you and Taehyung were still denying it but your friends weren't completely wrong when they talked about your relationship to each other.

“I really don’t know if I wanna shove you off this bridge or kiss your annoying ass,“ he stated shamelessly, trying to sound annoyed but his mood was just as good as yours and the cheeky flirting was something he missed over the last years.

It’s been too long since he met someone he liked so much that he didn’t have to care about what he said. Spending time with you made him feel careless. The night air and the sky that was full of stars just loosened up the mood even more.

Even though your heart was beating faster at his comment you tried to remain cool – he said it so casually as if the topic of kissing you was something completely normal to him, making you realize that maybe Taehyungand you were indeed becoming something more than friends.

“Oh, can I pick?”, you grinned at him.

“No,“ he answered easily while pushing you towards the edge of the bridge you were currently walking on, making you gasp a bit, while trying to balance yourself so you wouldn’t fall over the low wooden railing.

What exactly was he doing? Just in the right moment, he held you, his arm around your waist, being a bit too close to you which was making your heart beat insanely fast. As you looked at him your eyes were opened wide, the shock written all over your face.

Taehyung still was holding you close, giving you the brightest smile ever, his expression full of joy, “Did you really think that I’d let you fall?”

“Yes!“ you almost shouted out of shock, a hundred percent sure that he’d actually do something like that, “If anyone in this town would then it would be you.”

He acted a bit offended, as he pulled your body a bit closer to his again, your intestines feeling all over the place. Half of your body was still bent over the bridge as Taehyungs hold was the only support that stopped you from falling right into the water. His face came near yours and at this moment you wanted nothing more than to feel his lips on yours.

“Well, if you think that lowly of me,“ he started, before pausing his sentence, you could swear that you could feel his breath tingling on your lips and see his eyes wandering down to look at your them – but before anything else could happen you started losing balance as Taehyung let go of your body, making you fall right into the lake behind you.

Of course, he’d do something like that. You should've guessed that.

As you came up again you were drenched. The water was at least still warm enough to not make you shiver while climbing up to the bridge again. Taehyung was laughing wholeheartedly, his one hand once again covering his mouth, while holding his other hand out for you so he could help you.

You immediately took his offer, taking a tight grip on his hand before getting your revenge – within seconds Taehyung forcefully joined you in the water, his eyes popping out when you completely caught him off guard.

“I should’ve seen that coming,“ he admitted, now also completely wet but still amused, “I deserved that.”

The two of you were chuckling, no one of you seemed to want to get out of the water for now.

“Remember the one time we were having a contest here about who can stay underwater the longest when we were children?” you asked him thinking back to older days, one of the few memories you had with him.

He nodded while walking towards you, leaning his back against the bridge. His body was close to yours, his face facing yours, “I remember you and Jimin being afraid because you thought I fainted because I let my body swim on the surface with my head under the water still.”

Hitting his chest, you squinted your eyes, “You were the worst, seriously! Why would you do this to me? I was so afraid.”

His arm found your hip, resting lazily on it - you wondered if he’d also do that if he was completely sober, “To make good memories.”

“Well, that’s also about our only memory because you always avoided me when we were younger,“ you stated, a bit salty.

His laughter sounded different this time, if you didn’t know better you’d almost say there was some kind of admiration in it. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,“ he apologized, putting his hands up in the air, still laughing before looking at you once again – it’s like you completely forgot about being in the water now in the middle of the night.

“Wanna know a secret?” he asked you, whispering as if you had to be careful to not get caught.

“Always,“ you answered eager as your eyes widened in excitement.

“I avoided you because I had the biggest crush on you and Yoongi always said girls suck and if anyone of us ever kissed a girl they’d be kicked out of the gang,“ he admitted, smiling back at the memory.

“Okay, but Yoongi was literally my first kiss,“ you confessed to him, “I think he knew exactly why he told you that.”

Now it was Taehyung who was in shock, not you. “You’re kidding me,“ he sounded offended, “I can’t believe he’d play me like this because of some chick.”

“Hello? I’m right here,“ you scoffed, shaking your head amused.

“Oh, I bet you’d rather be where Yoongi is, huh?” he stared you down for a second before breaking character and starting to laugh, “But seriously, he never even told me. He knew I’d fight him about it.”

“It must be hard to always be as dramatic as you are,“ you scoffed, as you got out of the water again, starting to shiver a bit, “Let’s go home, I’m cold.”

He got out of the water too and you tried hard not to stare at his chest that was completely showing through his white shirt.

“You should have put on a jacket,“ he shrugged, acting as if it's your fault that you were completely drenched and cold.

“You little shit,“ you countered as the two of you were walking towards your home, “I’m only cold because you pushed me into the lake.”

“I had fun tonight,“ you admitted to him as you were standing in front of your door once again, “You’re not awful.”

“Thank you?”, he laughed unsure before he continued, “You’re also not awful, (y/n).”

“I mean, you were not the nicest in the beginning, I thought you hated me. But now, I think you tolerate me,“ you said, a winning smile on your face.

“Believe it or not, I think you’re pretty cool,” he mirrored your smile, nodding.

“I’ll let my diary know about that,” you assured him.

He just stood there for a second, looking at you. Both of you didn’t want to part, enjoying time with each other but you didn’t want things to get awkward.

“I’m sorry I pushed you into the water,“ he mentioned, laughing while apologizing.

You rolled your eyes at his half-assed apology, “Yeah sure. You better make up for that.”

He nodded, “I will. I promise. Good night, (y/n).“

Suddenly you felt him hugging you, not expecting it once again. Three hugs in one day were something you didn’t expect at all when you woke up this morning.

“Sleep well,“ you told him as you closed the door behind you, removing your make up, changing into comfortable clothes and letting yourself fall into your bed, falling asleep with a smile on your lips. You were definitely making progress.

A few days after your birthday and the situation with Taehyung, it was about time to talk to someone about your confusing feelings. Yoongi was the first person that came to your mind, definitely not wanting to talk to Jimin about it.

As the two of you were sitting outside on your porch, drinking a beer and enjoying the sunset slowly going down, you decided to tell him about what happened after you and Taehyung left on your birthday.

“He gifted you your old music box?” he asked confused, almost shocked, “That’s so much better than the vibrator we gifted you, dammit.”

You let out a laugh, “Anything is better than that.”

“Well, apparently you won’t be needing it any time soon if you and Taehyung continue to fall in love at that pace,“ your best friend gave you a small wink.

“Yoongi,“ you let out a pout, “I really don’t know what I should do. He was about to kiss me by the lake but instead, he let me fall into the water.”

He was trying his hardest to contain his laughter as you told the story but he couldn’t help it, “You really think he’s the one you want? I bet not even Jungkook would behave that awkward.”

Chuckling, you shrugged, “I guess I just like a challenge.”

Yoongi nodded, “He definitely is one. Bare with him, it’s been some time. His last girlfriend and him broke up quite some time ago.”

When Yoongi mentioned the word gilfriend you felt curiosity awakening inside of you, “What was she like?”

Taking a sip of his beer, he glanced at you, a bit pitiful, “Are you sure you wanna do this to yourself?”

“I’m just curious,“ you assured him, „No hard feelings.“

Before Yoongi could start telling you about her you were disturbed by your cousin, who just finished his work, a beer in his hand as he sat down on the free chair on your table, „What are you talking about?”

“My hopeless crush,“ you said, laughing.

“What else,“ he shrugged, unimpressed, “You could still date Jungkook, you know.”

You shook your head before turning back to Yoongi, “So, tell me about her, I can’t imagine him with a girl at all.”

“Are we talking about Elly?” Jimin asked confused, trying to catch up with your conversation.

“Yes,” Yoongi said, trying to start once again before getting interrupted by Jimin, also once again.

“She wasn’t shit, (y/n). Don’t worry about her. I never liked her. They weren’t even really a couple.”

Yoongi rolled his eyes, “She wasn’t all bad, Jimin. She was actually quite nice at the beginning. She’s from the town next to ours, the granddaughter of the owner of the library – we were friends with her back then when she still visited every weekend. I guess she was into Tae from the first second and he was, well, frustrated. So they became friends with benefits. Nothing too serious at first.”

“(Y/n), I really don’t get why you’d wanna know. You’ll just hurt yourself,“ your cousin seemed to worry, clearly disagreeing with your curiosity.

“They broke up so I won’t be hurt, I just can’t imagine him in a relationship at all. I need some information for research,“ you argued.

“He was a good boyfriend, I guess,“ Jimin thought about it, taking a big gulp of his beer, “Like he visited her often and made sure to bring her to every event or birthday. But one of them would always start a fight and it got so annoying over time. Every time he brought her I was afraid to say anything to him because if I only said one wrong word she’d start to discuss with him.”

Yoongi now interrupted him, “Well, it wasn’t only her who started fights, to be fair. Taehyung often enough started one too, whenever he was in a bad mood he’d always find a reason to fight.”

A scoff came out of your mouth, “I already thought he’d be one to pick fights, to be honest.”

“Speaking of the devil,“ Yoongi nodded towards the house of the Kim’s and as you turned around you saw Taehyung jogging over to you. He seemed to be in a good mood, a smile on his lips, something rather unusual.

“Why are you having a nice evening and no one cared to call me?” he asked as he arrived in front of you, holding up a big plate with many different pieces of cakes on it, “I brought cake.”

Jimin immediately took the plate and set it down in front of him as Taehyung sat down on the free seat on the bench beside you.

“We were just talking shit about you,“ Jimin started, getting up to get some forks from inside.

“Why? What did I do?” he asked, already sounding offended, ready to defend himself without knowing what even seemed to be the problem.

“I just told them about how you let me fall into the lake,“ you huffed, salty, not letting it go easily.

“Why would you do that?” he asked in a whiny tone, “Aren’t they teasing us enough already?”

“I don’t care about that. I still can’t believe you’ve done that. I could’ve caught a cold.”

He now crossed his arms in front of his chest, “You didn’t though, right? I brought you cake as an apology, just to find you hanging out with our friends, without me?”

Yoongi let out a laugh at your constant bickering, “Young love must be so nice.”

“Be quiet,“ you gave him a warning glance before you turned back to the real enemy here, “You think cake can just fix the trust I lost in you?”

He let out a laugh, “You’re being overdramatic.”

Actually, you couldn’t care less that he let you fall into the lake. It was just fun to pick fights with him, “You’re being an asshole.”

He scoffed before continuing your discussion in a mocking voice, “Wanted me to kiss you so bad that you can’t get over the fact that I didn’t?”

You let out a small gasp, not expecting his comeback. Yoongi and Jimin were both trying no to laugh watching the two of you fight.

“If you think that, you’re truly delusional,“ you stated, even though everyone here knew he was right, “The only reason I didn’t kill you right then was because I was so relieved you didn’t kiss me.”

He snorted, not ready to give up yet, “Sure, just keep on telling it to yourself until you start to believe it.”

And this is how you spent the rest of the evening. Three of your closest friends, cake, one or two or maybe even more beers, a beautiful pink sunset and most important - in the place you loved to call your home.

“(Y/n), give me a hand, please,“ your neighbor screamed from the other side of the farm, struggling to put up the pavilion that was supposed to cover the tables from the weather.

It was a warm autumn day but you knew that it could basically start to pour any second. Quickly you jogged over to Taehyung, leaving Jimin alone with the other preparations for the big harvest festival that was held once a year on the farm. It was a tradition you used to love as a child and you were more than happy to participate again this year.

As you walked over you couldn’t help but notice how mesmerizing he looked once again. There was sweat dripping down his face while he gave you a light and exhausted chuckle, holding up one side of the pavilion with his rather strong arms. The white shirt and grey sweatpants he was wearing might as well be the death of you. Oh god, you definitely hated being attracted to him.

“What’s up, Kim?” you asked, desperately trying to sound as unbothered as possible.

He, on the other hand, continued to smile, shaking his head, “Can you please hold up the other side over there?” he asked, pointing to it, “I’ll do the rest.”

You went over and held up the other side, having to stand on your tiptoes. “Are you excited for tonight?” you asked him, desperate to make conversation with him. Even though by now Taehyung was being very nice to you, you were still always trying to make him like you. Even though Jimin and Yoongi assured you he likes you quite a lot by now you still wanted him to admit to it. His attention was your favorite thing at the moment, you couldn’t get enough of it.

He shrugged while concentrating on a screw he was currently trying to get in, “Not really. It’s not gonna be different than any other year.”

“I’m here now so it is gonna be different than before,” you said, making him look up from his work for a second, his eyes finding yours.

“So, you’re going to make the harvest festival interesting again?” you saw the smirk on his face before continuing, “Don’t get up my hopes.”

“Share a bottle of liquor with me and I bet we’ll have a lot of fun,” you stated boldly, immediately embarrassed at your way too obvious flirting. At this point, you were sure that he was very aware of your obvious crush on him. He was many things. Rude, annoying, sometimes even a bit mean but delusional wasn’t one of them.

“Are you flirting with me, (y/n)?” he asked almost a bit teasingly.

“I am,” you said, trying to sound confident but you were pretty sure your now deep red cheeks were giving you away.

He seemed to be amused and he shook his head in what seemed to be joy.

“Not bad,” was all he said, shrugging before his full attention was back on building the pavilion.

You looked around the big farm as Taehyung was working. It looked beautiful, there were a lot of tables with benches, all of them had some flowers and candles on top of them, you could only imagine how cute it would look as soon as the sky was dark and all the candles were lit.

Jimin was currently preparing some baskets filled with eggs, milk, some wool, all different kinds of fruits and vegetables and even some feathers you picked up from the pond where the ducks stayed as a lucky charm – your uncle and Taehyung’s mother would sell them later on, the people always loved those little baskets.

Taehyung’s mother was inside, preparing food for the night. She was overdoing herself, cooking four different kinds of soups, baking too many loaves of bread for the visitors to eat, she even has been baking all kind of cakes since yesterday night.

“Your mum is an angel,” you mumbled more to yourself than to him but Taehyung still heard you, laughing a bit.

“She just really loves the harvest festival. But yes, I agree, she really is,” he answered without looking at you, “There’s gonna be plenty of leftovers tomorrow, I’ll bring you some if you want.”

You nodded even though he didn’t see, “I’d love that.”

“Hey, (y/n)!” Gus, the owner of the restaurant, came up to you. He drove up here in his truck, the whole back of it filled with different meals that he contributed for tonight, “Where should I put the fish and meat?”

Taehyung told you that you could leave and help Gus for now so you showed him where the food was being served. There was a long in the middle of the farm, where Gus’ and Mrs. Kim’s food was going to be sold later on. It was opposite to the little dancefloor your uncle built earlier, he even got a pretty good sound system for the night. You already anticipated seeing all of the older people dance later, it was always very cute to see them be happy. All the tables to sit on were placed in between the dancefloor and the food.

As you were helping Gus’ to carry the food you saw Yoongi and his parents coming up to you.

“Hey cutie,” your best friend greeted you as he put down the three beer crates he was casually caring like they didn’t weigh anything, “How are things going?”

“I’m really excited for tonight,” you cheered with a wide smile on your lips, “My last harvest festival was years ago, I still had to go to bed at eight o’clock at that time.”

He let out a laugh, “Oh, that’s when the fun is just starting.”

You only managed to finish all the work an hour before the first people came to the festival. Within no time the whole farm was filled with people as the sun was slowly going down.

You didn’t expect so many people to actually show up. Not only the whole village was attending tonight’s fest but a lot of them also brought their family from out of town, a lot of faces you’ve never seen before.

It luckily didn’t rain yet and you were hoping it would stay that way for the rest of the night. The sky was dark now and all the candles were lit, making the atmosphere cozy. People were eating, drinking and enjoying themselves, some even danced to the 80′s music that was playing already.

You were sitting on the side of a table, just looking around and appreciating everything as a few of your friends came up to you.

“Don’t you wanna eat something?” Jungkook asked you, nodding towards the table with the food, “We were just about to grab something, join us.”

“Let’s also grab a drink or two,” your cousin, who clearly already had more than just a drink or two, his bright pink cheeks exposing him, shouted as he came up behind Jungkook, Yoongi and Yoongi’s girlfriend.

Your mouth watered as you saw, and especially smelled, the food that was offered. Now you were very thankful that you didn’t have the time to eat all day. All the food looked amazing and you didn’t even know where to start. Hoseok and Namjoon both went for the meat but you wanted to start with something more light for now, looking at all the soups Mrs. Kim made.

“Try mum’s Italian wedding soup, it’s the best,” you flinched lightly as Taehyung came up behind you out of nowhere, his arm casually resting on your shoulder.

You tried to play it cool in front of your friends but inside you were all tense, just because of Tae being so close to you.

“I’ll have that then,” you agreed, telling his mother who was handing out food tonight. Both you and Taehyung offered her to help out earlier but she insisted that you should just enjoy the evening.

“Of course, my darling,” she poured some of the soup into a big cup, giving you and her son a wide smile, “You two look just adorable together.”

You felt yourself blushing but you were pretty sure that no one would notice in the dark.

“Right? We’ve been telling them the whole time,” Hoseok joined, excitement in his eyes, agreeing with his friends’ mother. You heard a deep, frustrated groan from Taehyung.

“Guys,” he squinted his eyes at both of them with a warning glance but he still was resting his arm on you, not even thinking about removing it, “Can you mind your own business? Just for once?”

Yoongi chuckled at the two of you, knowing exactly that you were trying your hardest to keep your cool, “You know they won’t leave you alone until something happens.”

He was right. But you weren’t sure if and when things would happen. And what those things even would be. When it came to Taehyung you felt more clueless than ever before. Not even your math class in senior year seemed that confusing.

“Yeah, because no one in this town knows how to respect the boundaries of other people,” Taehyung bitterly said through gritted teeth, slightly annoyed but everyone just let out a laugh, not taking him seriously, thinking it’s funny that he gets so worked up over some simple teasing.

“I’m sorry (y/n),” Mrs. Kim turned towards you, apologizing, but you could still see a little amused smile on her lips, “I hope I didn’t make you feel uncomfortable.”

“Oh, don’t worry. I don’t mind at all,” you assured her, “Don’t apologize.”

“I’ll go and get us something to drink,” Yoongi offered after he got some food, his lips already pressed against his girlfriend’s neck again before turning to you, “Save us a seat.”

You waited for the rest to get something to eat and wondered what was suddenly going on with Taehyung, he wasn’t leaving your side at all which was pretty unusual for him. Last week he was still too afraid to give you a birthday present in front of the boys and now he was suddenly even touching you in front of everyone?

“I’m sorry,” he whispered for only you to hear as all of you were looking for a table to sit on. On the way, he let go of you but still was walking right next to you. Not that you minded, you enjoyed the sudden attention he was giving you, you just had to get used to it.

“What for?” you asked him, shrugging lightly, “I don’t care if the guys tease us. They think we’re into each other, they won’t stop anyway.”

“Well, they aren’t so dumb after all, huh?” he still whispered to you, chuckling a bit as he turned around to the others, pointing to a free table, “Let’s sit down over there.”

This little shit was flirting with you.

The soup was amazing. The alcohol was pouring. The atmosphere was loud and filled with banter and laughter. Yoongi and his girl were making out in front of everyone in no time, literally being all over each other. Hoseok, Jungkook and Jimin were screaming along to ‘Come on Eileen’ playing in the background, doing those stupid fortnite dances to the old music, constantly motivating each other to do stupid moves and having the time of their lives. Namjoon was talking to his girlfriend, the majority of your friends still had no idea that they were actually dating and you wondered how they managed to keep it a secret in such a small town like this.

You were just laughing every now and then, enjoying everyone’s presence - an evening like this was exactly what you needed, full of friends and possibilities to make amazing memories.

Looking back at the fact that in the beginning, you were so afraid to start a new life here was ridiculous by now – this was your home, you were doing the thing you love with people you wouldn’t trade for anything. Not in a hundred years would you have thought that you’d find your happiness in this small town.

You carefully dared to look over to Taehyung, hoping he wouldn’t catch you staring – you felt tingly, it might be the wine or the butterflies in your stomach but you felt so much comfort and happiness that you wanted to explode.

The way he was laughing was making you go insane – you got lost in the wrinkles around his eyes and his side profile that seemed to be the most perfect thing you’ve ever seen. It was so nice and rare to see him letting go, being completely relaxed and warm. The longer you looked at him the more you craved something deep down in your stomach.

It felt like you were in a movie, the world around you blurred and slowing down while all you could concentrate on was the guy next to you: The guy, that used to be so cold to you and opened up step by step, going from thinking you were stealing chickens to flirting with you in front of everyone.

You secretly hoped that the two of you were figuring out the future of your relationship rather sooner than later, slowly growing impatient. It was obvious to anyone who’d spent only five minutes around you: There was an undeniable tension, a chemistry that both of you felt.

Still staring at him while everyone was laughing and talking he stole a glance from you, seeing that your attention was already completely on him. His features softened as soon as his eyes met yours and the big laughter on his face turned into a small but impactful smile - immediately you felt a rush of confidence running through your veins, your heart beating faster. You hated how you were literally melting for him but you knew exactly that you couldn’t fight it so you might as well let him in.

His eyes were still locked with yours, no one daring to break eye contact. You wondered how this moment could feel so intimate when there were literally 200 people gathered around you – it felt like you were all alone, everyone else was busy cracking jokes while the two of you were busy falling in love. Or at least that was what it felt like.

He gave you a small nod before sitting a bit closer to you, your thighs now touching. “Stop flirting with me. I might just break my cool character and blush,” he joked, making you chuckle before the two of you brought your attention back to your friends who were currently cheering for Jungkook and Jimin, both trying to down their beer faster than the other one.

You shook your head, letting out a laugh at them being messy. Taehyung’s hand sneakily rested on your lower back and you hoped it would stay there for a while.

Jimin finished first and laughed at Jungkook, who was still drinking, “Oh, I can’t believe you thought you could win against me. I’m the king when it comes to drinking,” he bragged.

Yoongi, who was for once breaking free from his girlfriend, shook his head at Jimin, “You’re overconfident. Taehyung, finish him.”

Taehyung let out a groan, “Don’t make me do this.”

“Let’s go Taehyungie, I bet I can beat you easily,” Jimin challenged him, knowing exactly how to provoke his friend.

“Dude, don’t do this to yourself, you’ll lose,” Hoseok yelled, “No one can beat Taehyung, you should know better than that.”

“I trained. And Taehyung didn’t show off his skills in a long time, I think you’re underestimating me,” he insisted, opening another bottle of beer and putting it down in front of Tae.

“Jimin, take it easy. It’s your fourth beer in what? Twenty minutes?” you interrupted, “I don’t wanna clean up all alone tomorrow because you are dying.”

“It’s harvest festival (y/n),” he whined while opening another bottle of wine for you, pouring something into your glass, “You gotta start learning how we do it here.”

Taehyung shook his head, letting out another deep sigh, “You have no chance against me,” he held up his beer and waited for Jimin to do the same.

Jimin had a satisfied smile on his lips, ready to give it his all, “I’m going to fight for your title.”

Taehyung let out a laugh, “That’s cute. Much luck trying.”

All of you were counting down from three and the guys started chugging down the beer like it was a life or death situation. It was stupid and childish but all of you were enjoying it, rooting for Tehyung. If all of your friends could agree on one thing then it would be that Jimin needs to be taken down back to earth every now and then.

You looked at him, your mouth slightly open. One thing you definitely didn’t know about Taehyung was how fast he could drink. He always seemed like the most reasonable and mature guy so you were kind of taken by surprise to see how he downed the bottle in the matter of a few seconds.

“Ha!” he let out, laughing as he put his bottle down, “You’re a fool, dude.”

Jimin let out a laugh, shrugging, “Never thought I had a chance, just wanted you to drink a bit. Who’s the fool now?”

“I didn’t know you could drink like that,” you turned to Taehyung.

“This guy used to get so wasted every weekend, he just acts all pure in front of you,” Namjoon exposed his friend, laughing.

You raised your eyebrow at Taehyung, “Oh, let’s see who can handle more then, shall we?”

Taehyung’s eyes widened surprised, not expecting you to challenge him when it comes to drinking, “You might regret that.”

“I don’t mind regretting a thing or two,” you poured the two of you some shots.

“That’s the spirit,” Jimin cheered, opening another bottle of beer.

Taehyung and you were clinking glasses, “To Bertha!” he mentioned his favorite before both of you downed the shots, making a grimace as the bitter liquor went down your throat.

“That shit tastes horrible,” you stated, making him laugh.

“No one said getting drunk is easy,” he countered before immediately pouring you another shot, “But you wanted this. We can stop if you can’t take it, you know.”

“Definitely not,” you scoffed raising your eyebrow at him and holding up the shot glass, “It’s going to be a long, long night.”

“Oh, don’t promise what you can’t keep,” he flirted amused, laughing at you before getting ready to down the next shot, “To you and me.”

Nodding, you gave him a smile, “Whatever that might mean.”

You didn’t know what was faster: The time flying by or your alcohol level rising. It was around midnight now and the night just started. All of you were still drinking eagerly, sharing stupid stories and daring each other to do even more stupid things. The music was loud and the older people were dancing like there’s no tomorrow while you were still sitting at the table, playing cards and taking videos and photos of each other.

Some other girls around your age joined your group, you didn’t know them but the rest did. It was a nice group of people overall.

You still were watching the elders dance, smiling to yourself as your uncle and Taehyung’s mum were dancing with each other, seemingly having the best time.

“Aren’t they cute?” Tae turned to you with a grin, his hand resting right above your knee, slightly squeezing it. You could tell the alcohol had its impact on him because he was getting more touchy by minute, his eyes sparkling.

You nodded, feeling a bit nostalgic seeing them together. They always have been close, both of them lost their significant others early and were left with their children and a whole farm to manage. “It’s nice that they’re having fun. I wish they’d take a break more often.”

Taehyung hummed in agreement, his thumb caressing your leg, “I’m happy Mum has Minwoo. They are always there for each other and talk shit about me and Jimin,” he joked, his eyes still glued to his mother.

He was clearly adoring their little dance while you were adoring him.

“He’s really grateful you’re here.”, you didn’t expect Taehyung to be so serious, a new side of him showing.

“I like being here. Wouldn’t go back,” you told him as you put your hand on top of his, appreciating the moment.

His eyes met yours, not thinking you’d hold his hand in front of everyone, even though no one could see, “You do? I didn’t think you’d fit in or like it here at first if I am honest.”

You let out a laugh, “Yeah, I know. You were very vocal about that if you don’t remember our first encounter as I came back.”

He joined your laughter, giving you an apologetic pout, “I’m sorry. I was being a bit rough, wasn’t I?”

You nodded, “Didn’t expect anything else though. You never opened up towards me when we were younger,” you explained to him in a soft voice, you didn’t want to hurt him with your words.

“I just wondered why you’d move here. I thought it was stupid. What does this little town offer you?” he asked curiously, his eyes glued back to your family.

“This, for example,” you gestured to them, “It’s very heartwarming here. You might not realize because you’ve always been here but this town is full of love.”

Taehyung narrowed his eyebrows a bit, “I bet the actual reason you like it so much here is this cute neighbor of yours.”

You scoffed at his confidence, “Oh, you mean that Taehyung guy? No, he’s just too busy loving himself, I doubt he could ever make time to let someone else in.”

He opened his mouth a bit, acting shocked, “Didn’t you hear?”, he asked you, turning his body to you now to completely face you, “Everyone says he’s a total sucker for you.”

Playing along, you slightly brushed your knees against his, “I don’t think so,” you let out a sigh, “Last week he had the perfect chance to kiss me but instead he threw me into the lake.”

He grinned, not expecting you being so witty. “I’m sure he was just nervous and regrets it very much.”

“I wonder what your sources are. They don’t seem very trustworthy. You know that guy, he has a heart made of stone.”

“Don’t let him fool you,” he came closer to whisper in your ear, “He’s actually a soft man inside.”

“(Y/n)!” your cousin screamed over to you, clearly drunk, ruining your little moment with Taehyung, “Let's go, dance with your favorite cousin.”

You sighed heavily, knowing that refusing won’t work even though you didn’t want the playful banter with Taehyung to end. So a few seconds later you found yourself on the dance floor, jamming to the old classics with your favorite human in town. Taehyung and Yoongi might be close, but no one would beat your family.

The two of you danced around like crazy, exaggerating every move, having fun without any worries for a few songs.

That was until you saw Jimin looking over to the rest of your group, his eyebrows narrowing, a mixture of confusion and anger in his eyes - his jaw clenched as he was glaring somewhere. You followed his gaze to see Taehyung talking to a girl you didn’t know. You didn’t think anything of it at first, he didn’t seem very close to her, maybe even a bit uncomfortable.

“That little shit,” your cousin raised his voice, looking at you, “He better doesn’t do anything stupid.”

You threw him a questioning look, no idea what was going on, “What do you mean? They’re just talking.”

He shook his head, “That’s Elly. Elly and Taehyung are never just talking.“

His ex. What did this mean to you? You didn’t feel jealous somehow. The evening was fine, Taehyung was clearly giving all of his attention to you, the two of you weren’t dating, you didn’t even kiss yet. Of course, you hoped that this would change sooner or later, your feelings for him were undeniable at this point and part of you thought that they weren’t one-sided.

Before you said anything, Jimin was losing his temper, “He can’t treat you like this, (y/n). I’m going to talk to him.”

You laughed at his clearly drunken state, shaking your head, “No no, I can manage my relationships alone, don’t worry.”

He tried to look you in the eyes, failing slightly. You were pretty sure that if you’d ask him to touch his nose right now, he’d miss it by miles.

“Why, of all people, Taehyung? He’s too cold for you. I love this dude but I don’t want you to go through a hard time because of him,” he pouted, suddenly wanting to discuss your love life with you.

You knew you shouldn’t laugh, Jimin was being sincere and caring about you right now but his state was so fucked up that you couldn’t help it, “Let’s get you some water.”

Letting out a heavy sigh because you ignored him, he followed you to the Mins’ table where they were selling drinks.

They immediately let out a laugh, “Oh, Jimin,” Yoongi’s mother said amused at his clearly fucked-up state.

“Can we have a water, please?” you asked her as you held Jimin, wishing he’d stay still.

“I’m fine, I’m fine,” he tried to convince you, “I could do a cartwheel without a problem.”

“Please don’t,” you laughed at his confidence, giving him the cup of water and thanking Yoongi’s mother, “Should we go back to the table?”

He nodded and you walked over to your group of friends, handing Jimin over to Jungkook. Looking around you saw that Taehyung was missing. Just as his ex-girlfriend.

Of course, you couldn’t know if they left together. Maybe Taehyung just went home without saying goodbye. Checking your phone to see if he maybe texted you just disappointed you even more. You hated that you suddenly felt so vulnerable. The evening was so much fun up to this point, the fact that such a tiny thing could ruin your mood completely made you feel foolish.

Not daring to ask Yoongi if he knew where he went or if they left together, knowing he’d try to comfort you, making you feel even worse, you said your goodbyes to your friends, claiming you were tired and needed some sleep.

Walking over to your home luckily was only taking you a minute, considering that the harvest festival was held on your farm. The worst thing about all this was that you didn’t know how to feel. Technically, you had no reason to be mad or jealous, Taehyung and you never did anything more than flirting.

On the other hand though, you liked him, so of course, it hurt you that he was probably enjoying himself with his ex-girlfriend right now. Your head hurt from all the alcohol and overthinking. You wished he would at least have said goodbye to you. Maybe, after all, he wasn’t into you as much as you thought. Today would’ve been his chance to make a move otherwise.

Opening your door you almost got scared to death. Your heartbeat was going crazy fast and you were even more confused than before. Just as you accepted the fact that Taehyung left the party with his ex-girlfriend, he was sitting on your sofa, playing games on his phones, waiting for no one else than you.

“What are you doing here? How did you even get in?” you almost screamed, still shocked by the thought that someone broke into your house at first.

He laughed, simply stating, “I know where your spare key is.”

You shook your head in disbelief, “But what are you doing here? Why are you just sitting on my sofa?”

“I wanted to leave the party. But I still wanted to spend time with you.”

“What about Elly?” you blurted out, your eyes immediately widening after you asked, realizing that he and you never talked about her.

He looked at you in shock, “W-What?” you never head him stutter before, “What about her? How do you know?”, the confusion on his face vanished a bit, sighing heavy, “Yoongi told you about her, right?”

You nodded, “It just came up once in a conversation we were having. And when I saw you with her I just assumed you left with her.”

He laughed, looking at you like you were crazy, “Why would I do that?”

You shrugged, not having an answer to his question. “What do I know? Maybe you missed her.”

“You’re crazy if you think I’d waste your time like that. And my time also,” he said softly, “Forget about her. She came up to me as soon as you left, trying to talk so I left.”

You nodded, understanding what was going on now, “So, you decided to break into my house?”

“Oh, I can leave if you want me to.“

“That’s not what I said,” you rolled your eyes. Suddenly, there was a pause. Neither of you were saying anything and you felt unsure of how to continue.

“Shouldn’t we clean outside a bit already?” you asked Taehyung, trying to break the silence so you’d get out of this overwhelming situation.

Taehyung, on the other hand, seemed to be very relaxed, he almost felt at home on your sofa. He stood up, coming closer and closer to you, “It can wait until tomorrow.”

When he stopped, he was right in front of you, your feet were almost touching and if someone would push you at this moment, you surely would land on top of him, which actually sounded pretty nice to you. You nodded, trying to sneakily take a deep breath to calm down, you had no idea why you were so nervous. He’s by far not the first guy you kissed but he might be the one kiss you anticipated the most.

His hand slowly ran up your arm, then down again, giving you goosebumps all over your skin, his gentleness making you fall for him even more. His hand found yours and you looked into his eyes, wanting to drown in them as your stomach felt like it was tied in knots.

A small smile formed on Taehyung’s lips as you locked eyes, not able to have a single clear thought. By now you were sure that tonight would be the night you’d finally have him where you wanted him. All for yourself.

Coming nearer, you felt his upper body almost touching yours, his head was leaning in and you saw him slowly closing his eyes as his free hand found your hip, bringing you even closer to him.

The moment before the actual kiss was already breathtaking enough. The mixed smell of his cologne and the alcohol the two of you drank earlier was making you feel dense. The touch of his hand was already burning but as his nose brushed yours slightly, a rush of adrenaline was sent through your whole body, making your stomach turn and you suddenly felt hot in places you didn’t know he had an impact on until now. It was rather quiet, the only sound you could hear was the muffled music from outside, but you couldn’t figure out what song was playing, only feeling the bass of it. Your heart was beating so fast, you hoped he couldn’t hear it.

But all those little and unimportant things around you vanished as soon as you felt his soft lips, pressed onto yours with the perfect amount pressure. The kiss developed from something shy and soft into the projection of what both of you had been craving secretly for so long in no time. No one dared to break the kiss, not wanting it to be over.

His hand wandered all over your body, from your hip to your waist, to your arms, to your neck, right back down to your lower back until he held onto your thighs.

“Jump,” he mumbled hectic, his voice deeper than usual, between your kisses, not wanting to stop.

“Are you sure?” you asked him carefully.

He chuckled into your kiss, “Never been more sure.”

So you did as he told you and jumped up, your legs now crossed around his hips as he held you up like it was nothing, deepening the kiss once again, your tongue playing with his. Being with him like this was more exciting than you ever could’ve imagined.

Your hand found the nape of his neck, burying itself in his soft hair, as he was carrying you to the sofa he was sitting on just a few minutes ago.

So there you were, on top of Kim Taehyung, straddling his muscular thighs, feeling a heat in your core that you haven’t felt in such a long time but missed so much. The way his hands were exploring your body while his lips were busy kissing every single spot on your jaw and your neck was making you feel like you were going insane, leaving you wanting every single part of him.

A small, rather quiet groan came out of your mouth as he pulled you closer to him, not able to suppress what you were feeling any second longer. He chuckled once more, clearly satisfied with the feelings he was giving you, before giving his attention to your lips again.

His one hand was now on your neck, supporting every movement between the two of you, as his other hand was resting on your hip, slowly making you rock back and forth on him, the tension in both of your pants growing.

Slowly, his hand started to wander under your shirt, to a place where you needed him desperately. He was caressing the skin under your shirt carefully, teasing while taking his time. You wanted nothing more than for him to move them upwards towards your breasts, giving you more and more.

His lips were doing its magic on your neck again, kissing and nibbling on a soft spot under your ear as his hand slowly wandered up until his thumb finally found your nipple under your lace bra, the contact making you flinch a bit because of the intense feeling.

He let out a deep groan, sending shivers down your body and an undeniable friction in your underwear grew, making you rock your hips into him once more.

You started to wonder if you were prepared for what was about to happen, the two of you were just starting and you already felt like a mess, wanting him so much more. But he took his time, enjoying every single second of you on top of him.

His hand was now kneading your breast, the pressure just exactly right as he brushed your nipple every now and then, already knowing its effect on you. Every time he touched your bud lightly you couldn’t help but moan.

You let out a small whine as your breast lost contact with his hand, not wanting him to stop. But as you realized that he was only stopping to pull up your shirt you were more than willing to give him what he wanted. Within seconds you were not only shirtless but also braless, as Taehyung was throwing your bra away to the floor.

He studied what you looked like, wanting to never forget this moment. Leaning back on the couch you saw a satisfied smirk on his lips as his hand found your nipple again. He now was looking right into your eyes and you held eye contact with him, trying not to break it as you got wetter every time his thumb was caressing your nipple.

He enjoyed watching you trying to contain yourself for sure. The smirk on his lip was growing now and his glance was filled with a mixture of lust, adoration and mostly, anticipation of what was going to happen next.

You put your hand on his shoulder to support yourself as you started to dry-hump him, letting out a moan, a louder one this time, as you felt his erection under you.

“Shit,” he moaned, breaking eye contact and throwing his head back, his eyes closed as he bit his lip.

All of a sudden he stopped you from your actions, holding your hips down with both of his hand as he looked at you, frustration all over his face, “(Y/n), are you sure about this? I don’t think I’ll be able to stop once we started.”

Your heart skipped a beat, appreciating his question but you immediately gave him another kiss, this time a bit softer, kissing him deeply, before whispering into his ears. “Don’t you dare to stop now, Taehyung.”

You could hear his chuckle, his breath on your neck giving you goosebumps. “Thank god,” he said before lifting you up without warning you, making you scream a bit, afraid he’d let you fall.

“Be careful, you scared me to death,” you laughed as you were being carried towards your bedroom.

“You think I’d let you fall?” he said amused, shaking his head in disbelief.

“Wouldn’t be the first time,” you countered, making him laugh as he arrived in your bedroom, letting you down on top of your bed - now you were under him, lying down as he was still sitting on his knees, taking in the view of your naked upper body right in front of him, for him only.

You did the same - and what a beautiful view it was. He was hovering over you, your legs between his as he was pulling his top over his head, throwing it away before unbuckling his belt as you were running your hand over his toned chest.

Not long until both of you were only left in your underwear. Taehyung slowly removed your pants, before coming back up to you, supporting himself on his elbows as he gave you a deep kiss, adding tongue and caressing your cheek before looking at you. You couldn’t help but smile.

Taehyung gave you a small smile back, his eyes soft, “I love that smile.”

Before you could think about his compliment, one that he never gave you before, before you could get flustered or say anything back he suddenly changed the game completely, fastly pulling your underwear to the side and sliding one finger inside of you while his thumb was rubbing circles against your clit.

Taken aback by his sudden actions, you let out a loud moan, almost a scream, making Taehyungg smirk a bit before his lips wandered down to your neck once again, taking his time with you as he pumped his finger in and out in just the right rhythm. You moved your hip into his movements as his lips kissed down to your chest, his free hand holding your breast while his mouth teasingly played with your nipple, licking it and twirling his tongue around it, making you a moaning mess already.

Your hand was lightly stroking his dick through his boxers, leaving you wanting more. God, the things you wanted him to do with you were unholy.

The way he glanced at you as he was kissing his way down to your core looked like living art. Your whole body wanted him so bad, just the thought of where his mouth would travel to next or how it would feel when you’d finally feel him inside of you was making you go insane. Never before have you wanted something as much and at the same time hoped he’d take his time before.

Arriving at his destination he let out a moan, definitely being into all of this a bit too much too. He started to slowly kiss your inner thighs, holding your legs up a bit, teasing every part around where you wanted him the most.

“Stop teasing,” you whined, wanting him so much more than you currently had.

He chuckled against your core, the warm air making you flinch, “I thought that’s our thing,” before licking along your wet folds and then adding another finger, his tongue giving all its attention to your clit.

The pace in that he was going down on you was making your knees feel weak. He looked so handsome, his forehead in wrinkles as he was concentrating on pleasing you completely, moans vibrating against you.

It didn’t take long for the two of you until you were having sex, the two of you completely concentrating on the sensational feeling for the next moments.

After you finished you laid down on your stomach, not able to really move, as Taehyung let himself fall right next to you, giving your nose a small peck. He was not only out of breath but also still in trance of what had just happened, “I didn’t expect this,” he breathed, calming down from his orgasm.

You giggled a bit, “What? Us having sex?”

The smile he gave you made your heart race like crazy, his messy hair falling into his eyes, “I’m not complaining though.”

For a second you were lying there, letting Taehyung catch his breath and calming down. You felt your legs shaking from the intercourse you just had.

“Feel my legs,” you ordered chuckling, his hand on your thigh in a second as he felt how much you were shaking.

“Glad you liked it,” he laughed before getting up, “I’ll get you a towel, be right back.”

As you were waiting for him to come back you realized what had just happened. After all the flirting and teasing Taehyung and you actually ended up in your bed. The thought made you dizzy, but it could also be from the alcohol you drank. It seemed too good to be true.

Cleaning you up, you suddenly heard a laugh as he grabbed your ass, “I may or may not have left some marks. I’m sorry.”

You turned you head back, squinting your eyes at him, “You’re lucky no one else sees that part of me. The others would tease me to death about that.”

Slowly, he climbed back up to lay next to you, both of you on your stomach, his hand caressing your side, “Apparently they have a bet going on about when we’re going to end up together.”

“I’m not even surprised. Sounds like them,” you closed your eyes, enjoying Taehyung’s affection, “This feels nice.”

He hummed in agreement before giving you a small kiss, his forehead resting next to yours, “I could stay like this forever.”

“Then stay,” you offered, still not opening your eyes. Taehyung was getting a blanket, throwing it over both of you so you wouldn’t freeze, “Don’t leave. Stay here.”

“You want me to?” he asked, his hand now playing with your hair, “Alright, I’ll stay then. Sleep a bit, it’s late and you’re drunk.”

“I will, just give me one more kiss, okay?” you asked him, feeling yourself getting more tired by any passing second.

He chuckled as he came closer to your face once again, holding your face in his hands as he softly pressed his lips onto yours one more time, your naked bodies touching. “Good night, (y/n).”

Falling asleep, everything seemed too good to be true. Taehyung beside you, his scent in your nose as you slowly drifted to sleep in his arms.

As you woke up he was gone. First, you thought you had dreamed about yesterday's events but after a few seconds, you realized that it wasn’t a dream. You got drunk, you had sex, you fell asleep next to him. And now, he was gone.

Standing up, you wrapped your blanket around your naked body, looking for the man that you spend the night with but he was nowhere to be seen.

Well, maybe it was too good to be true.

It’s been five days. Five days since you shared your bed with Taehyung. Five days and your goddamn sheets still smelled like him – or maybe you were hallucinating at this point, wanting just something that reminds you of him around you.

The two of you talked to each other casually when you met on the farm. You said hello and talked about the weather. Shared awkward smiles. And that was about it. It’s not like he was cold to you or anything, he seemed to feel just as helpless and awkward about your drunk night together as you. As much as you loved the night and what happened, you definitely hated the aftermath.

Talking to Yoongi about it didn’t help, sadly. While you appreciate that he always listens to you and is ready to give you advice at any given time, you still had hoped that he’d suggest something else than to give him a bit of time.

The current tension between you was even worse than the sexual tension between you before. You didn’t care if you and Taehyung wouldn’t end up as a couple, of course, you’d like that very much and still hoped that things were going into that direction, but the two of you developed too much to just destroy the nice friendship you built because of feelings getting in the way.

So you decided to visit him that afternoon, feeling anxious as you were walking up the front porch of your neighbors. You barely remember how their house looked like from the inside since it’s been so long since you been inside. The front door stood open and you knocked against it, not wanting to be rude.

“Mrs. Kim?” you called for her as you slowly stepped inside, looking if you could find her but there was no sign of her being home.

Walking up the stairs, you tried to remember which room belonged to Taehyung until you were distracted by something odd and unexpected – suddenly your ears were filled with a beautiful but rather sad piano melody coming from the room on the back of the corridor.

Curious, your feet walked towards the source of the sound, your heart suddenly felt heavy, the sad melody immediately managed to impact your mood, making you feel blue. A part of you wanted to turn around and leave Taehyung alone, just like he probably wanted you to – if you figured out one thing about him over the last few months than it was the fact that this man was a complicated person, hard to read and even harder to talk to, but you decided to accept that. There were only two options: Either you’d work it out with him or you wouldn’t.

You stood in the open door, looking at the back of the man your heart wanted so bad, sitting in front of a big, wooden piano – for a second you couldn’t even believe that he was able to play such a heart touching piece of art, sitting in his room all alone. What a waste it was for him to play all alone, with no one around to hear. It made your heart sting for a second, at this point you liked him too much to go back. Just looking at him being at peace was making you crave to be the woman beside him. After all, he was Kim Taehyung, the one man that managed to surprise you over and over again.

As quiet as possible you walked into the tidy and light room, not wanting to give him a heart attack by creeping up on him but also not wanting him to stop playing. It was a beautiful sight, the way his hands were gliding on the big instrument so smooth and without thinking. You couldn’t see his face yet but you were already swooning over how beautiful he looked.

He looked over his shoulders as you cleared your throat, continuing to play even without paying attention to the keys, giving you an unreadable smile. You sat down on his bed that was placed right beside the piano as he stopped playing.

“Didn’t expect you to come visit me if I am honest,“ Taehyung admitted, almost sounding shy. He seemed to be a bit uncomfortable, knowing exactly that he finally had to face the night you shared a few days ago.

“Well, I didn’t expect you to be able to play the piano so skillfully but yet, here you are, doing exactly that,“ you countered in a soft tone, not wanting him to feel like you were mad at him, “That sounded beautiful.”

He chuckled and you were happy to see him relax a bit, “You think so? It was rather depressing, wasn't it?”

“Matching your mood?” you dared to ask him carefully, trying to address the whole situation somehow.

He stood up from his chair and walked over to you, sitting down next to you on his bed, “It’s my dad’s birthday today. He taught me the song I just played.”

His voice was full of love while talking about his father but you could hear the hidden sadness behind it. You didn’t know about that and suddenly, you felt guilt rushing over you. While you were wondering why he didn't try to solve the obvious problem between you and him he had something way harder to deal with. Looking up at you, he forced a small smile, “Mum and Olli are visiting his grave but I didn’t feel like going.”

Trying to give him any kind of comfort you nodded, pressing your lips into a thin line. You were surprised that he was opening up to you but as sad as the situation was, it was relieving you that he finally talked to someone about it. According to Jimin and Yoongi he tried to avoid this topic as much as he could.

“Why did you stay here?” you asked him, trying to keep the conversation going and show him your support. What you didn’t want was overwhelm him with questions, so you slowly started to see how comfortable he was around you.

He shrugged, looking up at the ceiling, “It’s such a sad place. I feel like we shouldn’t be sad on his birthday, if that makes sense. We should eat his favorite food and drink a beer and stay up too long, playing guitar on the porch. Mum and Dad always sneaked out at night on his birthday, taking drunk walks. They thought I didn’t notice but they were always coming back, laughing loudly. I miss celebrating his birthdays. But it’s hard to be happy on his birthday without him here.”

He laid down on his bed, his head right next to where you were currently sitting. You studied his face, his eyes still glued to the ceiling, not daring to look at you, the woman he hurt by leaving her after having sex with her. The sun outside was setting, leaving Taehyung’s whole room in a golden light, his tan skin was glowing and his light-brown hair shimmering.

While he seemed to be sad on the outside you could see that talking about the memories he made with his father was making him feel lighter. It was nice seeing him talking about his dad - they always have been very close, you still could recall that.

“I still remember him so vividly. He always gifted me self-made jam before I left the city and no other jam, literally not a single one at home was comparable to his,“ you shared your memory with Taehyung, looking out of the big window in his room, admiring the sun, “He has a beautiful soul.”  

When you came over you wouldn't have expected to talk to Taehyung about his father but you knew that everything else, every problem and unsolved question, between the two of you could wait for now.

“I wish I was more like him,“ his voice was nothing more than a mumble, almost inaudible. The sudden craving to hold him came over you, to comfort him in your arms, to kiss him until he felt better. But you held back, as long as you didn’t talk about the obvious.

“What do you mean?” you asked him, daring to lay down beside him – luckily, he didn’t seem to mind. The two of you didn’t touch or cuddled, you just were lying there, on his bed, having a serious and meaningful conversation.

“He was so kind and positive. He told my mother different reasons why he loved her every night. Even after a long day of work he still took his time and practiced the piano with me every night and then brought Olli to bed, reading him a good night story or playing him songs on the guitar until he fell asleep. He taught me so much but still, I could never be so full of love like he used to be.”

“You think too low of yourself, Tae,“ you said determined, meaning it, “I don’t think you see how much your mother appreciates everything you do for her. She knows that you didn’t plan out your life like this but you’re staying here for her. And Olli looks up to you so much, you could do nothing to let him down.”

He shrugged, looking at you for a second, “I don’t feel like that’s enough.”

Feeling heartbroken about hearing him talk so bad about himself, your hand found his in between the two of you, linking it with yours, now it was you who didn't dare to look into his eyes, “Look at us then.”

“What do you mean?” he asked you, confused.

“Since I moved here you gave me so much joy and helped me everywhere you could. You have no idea how much I appreciate all the things you’ve done for me since I came here, complicated tensions between us or not,“ you meant every word.

He scoffed lightly, “I attacked you on your first day, made you churn butter and let you fall into the lake in the middle of the night on your birthday.”

You couldn’t help but laugh a bit at his words, “Well, yes. And I could still kill you for all of those things. But,“ you started, turning your body towards him to look into his eyes, “You also helped me calm the cows during the storm. You gave me the most meaningful birthday present I could’ve thought of. You brought me a basket full of my favorite fruits even though you still deny that you did-”

He let out a soft chuckle before interrupting you, “That wasn’t me,“ he insisted once again with a grin on his face.

“Sure, Kim,“ you rolled your eyes at him picking up this discussion again, “You might think you’re being cold but you’re not at all.”

Now he turned to face you too, both of you lying on the side, looking in each other’s eyes. His brows narrowed as he tried to say something to you, the expression in his eyes seemed to be hurt, maybe even guilty.

A heavy sigh came from his lips before he closed his eyes, “I just left you. That morning. I just got up and left.”

Those words made you freeze. After all, you came here to talk about exactly that but it seemed so wrong right now, “We don’t have to talk abou-”

“I just left,“ he repeated, seeming disappointed with himself, “I never just left someone after having sex with them. There were people that meant way less to me and I still stayed the morning after. I am being a complete asshole to you all the time and still, you don’t hate me. You’re here, trying to make sure I’m okay.”

Keeping quiet was the only thing you could do at that moment. Taehyungs words seemed harsh but the tone in his voice sounded guilty. Even if you wanted to, you couldn’t say anything – you had no idea what Taehyung was trying to say.

“Tae,“ you finally started after a few seconds, his full attention on you, “This day is hard enough for you already. We don’t have to talk about that right now. I’m not mad at you.”

“You should be though. I know, I am pretty amazing but not even such a godlike man like me shouldn’t treat you like this,“ he joked but both of you knew it was his way of comprehending because he didn’t know how to handle the conversation you were about to have since he always struggled to talk about his feelings, especially sober.

“Why did you leave then?” you asked him the one question you asked yourself over and over again. There could have been millions of options in your mind. Maybe, he regretted it and it was just a drunk mistake. Maybe, the feelings you thought he had for you were just sexually. Maybe, he simply had to go and do something early in the morning. So many maybes that have gone through your head without any idea if any of those maybe’s were right.

“I don’t know. I wish I didn’t,“ he bit his lip nervously, not looking into your eyes anymore, afraid to see your reaction, “Maybe I’m afraid.”

“Afraid of what?” you asked, not sure if you actually wanted to know the answer. You felt many emotions when it came to him. You felt happiness, joy, hope, possibly love. On other days you felt powerless, insecure and confused. What you never felt was being afraid. Pretty sure, you actually felt safe around him.

“I’m not as flawless and strong as I constantly try to convince you I am,“ he sighed, pressing his lips into a straight line, “I couldn’t stand to hurt you because of my own problems. But I still did.”

Slowly you nodded as your heart was sinking deeper and deeper in your stomach, “You’ve got to talk to me. What are you thinking about?”

Taehyung hated this probably even more than you did. He was good in so many things – he was a good friend, a better brother and the best son. He was an amazing cook and apparently, an amazing piano player. He could flirt like no tomorrow and crack jokes around his friends that would make everyone laugh. He could drink a lot and he could make your heart beat faster.

There were countless things he was able to be and to do without any problem. But when it came to talking about his feelings and showing his vulnerable side he failed. You knew that just as good as everyone else but if he wouldn’t talk, you couldn’t continue to work on your relationship.

“I–“ he started but stopped, looking at you sternly while clenching his jaw a bit. His eyebrows furrowed and his expression looked almost pained, trying to find the right words, “I think that I loved the night with you. I did, really. But maybe, it was a bit thoughtless of us.”

“So, what you’re trying to say is that you regret it,“ you stated, trying to just get this conversation over with, hoping he couldn’t see or hear that you felt like he just put a knife in your stomach.

„God, no,“ his answer bursted out of him like a bullet before he started mumbling to himself, „I am truly terrible at this.“

You gave him a few seconds to gather his thoughts even though the silence was deafening. This wasn't how you expected to spend your first time in Taehyung's bed at all.

„I like you, (y/n),“ he then spoke, determined, „Obviously I do. And I think you like me too, or at least I hope you do. But we were drunk and desperate when we had sex and I wanted it to be special.“

You couldn't help but pout at his helpless confession, adoring him even more than before. Within seconds all of your doubts vanished – as long as Taehyung liked you too you would find a way to work everything out. Trying not to let your overflowing happiness show, you gave him a small smirk, „You thought about us having sex?“

Luckily, his body relaxed too, an annoyed smile appearing on his handsome face, „All the time,“ he scrunched his nose, his arm wrapping itself around your waist.

„So, what you're saying is that you ignored me for days because you didn't like the way it happened?“ you asked him, coming back to the actual topic.

Frowning, he sighed, „When you put it like this it sounds stupid.“

„Because it is,“ you insisted, squinting your eyes at him, „I thought you avoided me because you hated me or something like that.“

„I'm so sorry,“ he apologized again, his face coming closer to yours, „Apparently, I'm very bad at this.“

„So, what are we doing now?“ you asked him, feeling a bit anxious even though Taehyung just told you that he liked you too, so you had nothing to worry about.

„First, I want to kiss you if you're fine with that,“ his fingers were drawing little patterns on your waist, „and then I'd like us to become something serious.“

Nodding, you did as he asked and gave him a kiss, his soft lips feeling just as good, if not better, as you remembered them. You felt something like butterflies in your stomach and you thought that Taehyung would probably make fun of you if he knew how jolly he made you feel.

Breaking from the kiss, the most handsome man you've ever seen stared you down for a second, not saying anything.

„We should celebrate,“ he suddenly suggested.

„What do you have in mind?“ you asked him curiously, not once escaping his gaze.

„Let me take you out to dinner,“ his voice was sweet as honey and you were sure you never heard him talk in such a soft tone – it might be the rest of guilt he still felt towards you or the fact that now you officially knew about each other's feelings but you could get used to it. You wanted to get used to it.

„Right now?“ you asked him, wondering if it would be okay considering it was his father's birthday.

„I don't wanna wait a second longer,“ he smirked at his own cheesiness, getting out of his bed to get ready to go.

You joined him, „Stop being so loving. God, where did my cynical Taehyung go?“

Rolling his eyes, he chuckled as he wrapped his arm around your waist, walking down the hallway with you. „This changes nothing,“ he gestured between the two of you, „You're still terribly annoying even if we're together now.“

„I could get used to the sound of that,“ you scrunched your nose as your eyes met before you repeated his words, „We're together now.“

Even though he tried to hide it, he was just as excited about the label as you were. You could feel it in the way he touched you and the sparkle in his eyes gave him away.

A few minutes later you were sitting outside of the restaurant in the heart of your city, the marketplace was pretty quiet as it slowly got dark outside, a candle lit on your table.

The owner of the restaurant greeted you, raising his eyebrow and smirking as he saw the two of you together. „Oh, what a nice sight to see the two of you here together. Is this a date by any chance?“

You let Taehyung answer, not knowing if he was okay with telling people yet.

„It's still a secret so you have to keep quiet, please,“ he answered with a proud smile on his lips and you could swear his chest was sticking out a bit.

„What a pretty couple,“ he sang as he went back inside, giving you a bit of time to read the menu and decide on what to eat.

Even though it was almost autumn it was still warm outside – you loved those kind of late summer evenings. Without even having a single sip of alcohol you felt almost tipsy, the man opposite of you making you feel all light and smitten.

„This is the downside of living in such a small town,“ Taehyung started, his skin glowing in the candlelight, „We have zero privacy.“

„I don't mind,“ you shrugged, „They're going to find out sooner or later. It's the charm of towns like ours.“

„I just would like to take you out on a date every now and then without one of the guys crashing it because they see us,“ he explained, „But you're right, it's not as bad here as I make it out to be.“

He took your hand that was resting on the table, caressing it with his thumb. Every touch you two shared make you shiver in anticipation for more. Even though you already knew you were head over heels for him you felt yourself falling deeper every time you touched.

Time went by way too fast for your liking and before you knew it you two had your dinner, your dessert and even some drinks afterwards. The atmosphere was light, both of you enjoying each other's company after not talking for some days.

„I don't want this night to end just yet,“ you pouted. Before you dared to take his hands you glanced around to see if Jimin was anywhere to be seen, not wanting him to disturb your peace.

Your new boyfriend, still a weird thought to call him that, nodded, „I can stay if you want to.“

Before you could say anything he fastly added, „I don't have to though. It's your decision. I can leave too.“

You gave him a weird glance, „You're acting like this would be a first for us.“

Not saying anything he almost froze in front of you, fidgeting with his hands, staring at your door. For a few seconds you mustered him, waiting if he'd say something but nothing came out of his mouth, which was pretty unusual for him.

„Oh god, you're nervous!“ your grin was a mile wide and you clapped your hands amused, „Kim Taehyung is nervous because of me. I can't wait to tell my diary about this.“

Frustration was written all over his face as he closed his eyes as if he couldn't believe himself. „Your diary must be full of my name,“ he mumbled under his breath before looking at you again, the satisfied smile on your face provoking him, „Stop making fun of me.“

As you were searching for your keys in your back he hugged you from behind, pressing a kiss against your hair, “Let’s drink some beer and watch a movie.”

Nodding, you stole a quick kiss from his lips and opened the door, letting the both of you in.

“I’m going to get a blanket,” you informed him, “Get some beers, I’ll meet you in the couch in a minute.

„What do you wanna watch?“ he asked you a few moments later, one leg bent while the other one was spread out on your sofa, his arm spread on the back of it, just waiting for you to join him.

The sight of him comfortably sitting on your sofa gave you the most domestic feeling you've felt in a long time – he seemed to look even better than before somehow.

„Let's watch an animal documentation,“ you responded, sitting down next to him. The blanket you brought from your bedroom spread over the two of you, you dared to cuddle yourself up to him and he seemed to enjoy it as much as you, giving your head a quick kiss, your face resting on his chest.

„You're weird,“ he muttered, „Let's watch a horror movie instead.“

Giving him an unimpressed glance, you sighed, „How cliche.“

You could feel his chuckle going through his chest, „At least it would give me a reason to stay for the night.“

Rolling your eyes, you looked up at him, his glance already on you, „Why? Because you're too afraid of horror movies? Because I am certainly not.“

„I have such a brave girlfriend,“ he acknowledged in a sarcastic tone while opening two beers, handing you one, „Here's to us, babe.“

Clinking your bottles, you took a sip of your beer, „So, you're a babe kind of guy? Wouldn't have thought that.“

„I can call you asshole if you prefer that,“ he said seriously before starting to laugh at his own joke once again.

And with that, the rest of the evening was just as perfect as the first part. It was just you, Taehyung, some beers and Netflix. Every now and then you shared kisses, sometimes those kisses were a bit more passionate and longer, turning into full make-out sessions before Taehyung started to whine because he missed the plot of the movie you were watching.

“God, I’m so happy,” he told you softly as you were slowly falling asleep in his arms, relaxing completely under his touch, “I wanted this for so long.”

You and Taehyung managed to keep your relationship a secret for about two weeks. It took you only two short weeks to decide that it didn’t make any sense to keep it from them. Not only were both of you pretty sure that the relationship between you was serious but also, like always, none of your friends stopped their teasing, making it difficult to stay hidden because their eyes were always on you.

“We have to tell them,” your boyfriend looked at you, “It’s a miracle they didn’t find out yet.”

You chuckled, wrapping your legs around his, “I guess you’re right. But they are going to be so nosey about it. I hate it already.”

It was a late summer Saturday evening, probably one of the lasts warm days for this year and Yoongi decided to gather your friends and your family together for one last barbecue.

Walking outside, you linked your arm with Taehyung’s, something you’ve never done before in front of other people. A part of you almost felt nervous to let the rest know.

“You’re ready?” he asked you, giving you a small wink as you walked towards the big table next to the barbecue grill. Your families were already sitting down on the big table while Yoongi and Hoseok were struggling to get the barbecue grill to work. It was a beautiful evening, the sun was still high but was about to sink, the warm summer breeze felt refreshing and the big table in the garden was full of drinks and food, from meat to salads to bread to vegetables. Yoongi’s parents were there too, currently mixing some cocktails.

Jimin was the first to spot the two of you walking out of your cottage, giving you a confused glance, his eyebrows narrowed. He stopped telling the other a story he was in the middle of, wondering about the sudden skinship. Immediately, everyone turned their heads to where he was looking, wondering what made Jimin speechless.

As you arrived you said nothing, waiting for anyone to say something.

Yoongi looked at you with a big grin on his face. “What is that supposed to mean?” he asked, pointing onto your linked arms.

“You are fucking with us, aren’t you?”, your cousin asked suspiciously, “Ha Ha. Very funny.”

“No, for once I’m serious,” you replied, amused because he didn’t believe you, “Are you really surprised?”

Mrs. Kim and your uncle looked at each other, a smile on their faces.

“Taehyung, are you serious? You can’t trick your old mother like this, don’t make me excited for something that isn’t true.”

Taehyung chuckled at his mother, nodding, “Don’t worry, mum. I’d never lie to you.”

Jimin still didn’t seem to believe you, “If you’re not kidding you gotta kiss,” he insisted with a sly smirk, thinking that he exposed you now.

You looked at Tae, giving him a questioning glance, not knowing if he’d be comfortable kissing you in front of everyone. But he didn’t seem to care and just shook his head amused before he came closer to give you a short, but still very adorable, kiss on your lips, his arm now around your waist, before turning to Jimin, who looked like he was about to faint.

“Who do you think you are just dating my cousin without asking me for permission?” he yelled angrily, getting ready to fight Taehyung.

You, Yoongi and Hoseok started to laugh out loud as Jimin started to chase after Taehyung.

Sitting down on the table right next to Yoongi’s seat he pinched your cheeks lightly, “Congratulations, finally trapped him, huh?”

You nodded, “Was about time. I was slowly going insane.”

“In a more peaceful minute, you need to tell me all about how it happened, alright?” your best friend said with a satisfied smile on his lips, “And don’t forget me now that you’re in love.”

“How could I ever?” you promised, laughing as Taehyung came back to the table, out of breath from running away from Jimin.

“Your cousin is crazy, (y/n),” he breathed heavily, shaking his head, “Maybe I have to reconsider becoming part of your family.”

“Well, too late now,“ you shrugged as Jimin  joined the table again too, a goofy smile on his face as he turned to you.

“So, I assume I can’t try to set you up with Jungkook anymore, right?” he joked, sitting back down on his chair and opening two cans of beer, one for himself and the other one for you.

„You better watch your mouth,“ your boyfriend warned Jimin, giving him a warning glance.

A few hours later, the sky was pitch-black by now and the stars sparkling, you noticed that Taehyung was gone for quite some time now and decided to go check up on him - you saw him going to the barn earlier.

As you walked over to Taehyung he already noticed you but didn’t look at you yet. Instead, you only saw his back as he was busy giving Bertha some kisses.

“Oh no, don’t worry, Bertha,“ he talked to her, “You’re still my favorite cow, just don’t tell (y/n).”

You rolled your eyes, scoffing, “You’re trying to make me jealous?”

He turned around, acting as if he didn’t realize you coming on, “Oh no, (y/n),“ his voice was mocking, “You shouldn’t have seen this, I can explain, I promise.”

Laughing at his own joke, he came over to you and put his arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer to him. Trying to give you a kiss, you freed yourself from his grip, giving him the cold shoulder.

“No, go and kiss Bertha, if you love her so much,“ you huffed and held your chin up high, trying to stay serious but Taehyung wasn’t having it. Within seconds his arms were wrapped around you once again, now tighter than before so you couldn’t escape if you wanted.

Pulling you into a hug, he locked his eyes with you, a joyful smile on his still so beautiful lips, “You’re so annoying.”

Scoffing, you avoided his eyes, still playing hard to get, „I thought we're over the whole 'you're annoying me' phase.“

„Actually, each time I told you that you're annoying I fell in love with you a bit more,“ your boyfriend confessed, still hugging you tightly before smirking, „But you still were a pain in the ass.“  

You gave him a quick and small kiss before resting your forehead against his, “I want to spend the rest of my life annoying you.”

He let out a small laugh, his eyes closed. “Oh, that’s good,“ suddenly he picked you up, giving you no other chance as to hold onto him, your legs around his waist as he was holding you up, his arms tightly around your waist, “Because I want to spend the rest of my annoying life with you.”

#bts #taehyung #taehyung imagine #taehyung scenario #taehyung smut #taehyung au #jungkook #jimin #namjoon #hoseok #yoongi #seokjin #bts imagines #taehyung x reader #taehyung fanfic

[luna-writes-stuff]

I would be honored if you could do an imagine for Fili crushing on someone who went on the journey with the Company. He thought she liked his brother, but after seeing him with Tauriel, Fili feels like he has a chance and offers everything to make her as happy as he thought she would be with Kili. Lovely fluff and some misunderstandings with everyone living because IF I CAN'T SEE CANON THEN IT DOESN'T EXIST

Mixed signals, Fili Durin (platonic Kili x reader)

what do you mean they don’t usually live???? Idk I always skip the last half hour of botfa. If I don’t see it, it doesn’t exist.

Ahahah I got taken away a bit so it’s a long request. Sorry….

Headcanons, female s/o

Tw: misunderstood feelings, mention of injury and blood, tiny sprinkle of angst, fluff, Kili being a lil shit, Fili being jealous, few mentions of Y/N I’m so sorry.

- This man is whipped for you. I posted a request similar to this one yesterday, and I feel like it says enough.

- The moment he sees you, he knows you’re his One. Yet, he can’t allow himself to show you. His brother wouldn’t shut up about it and besides that, after Erebor was to be reclaimed, he had to marry royalty in order to form an alliance.

- But Thorin wasn’t blind. He has seen the look in Dis’ eyes many times before. He had seen his sister find her One, so it came as nothing out of the ordinary when he witnessed his nephew do the same.

- And this is pre-dragonsickness. Back when Thorin was all “I hate everyone but I guess I have to keep up with these two idiots so I’ll tolerate them.”

- And he wanted to grant Fili the opportunity to be with his One. He had even told him to simply go for it.

- But Fili was a bit insecure. When you met him, you didn’t seem taken away in any way. It was almost as if it had only been him who was in love.

- And with that, you had grown remarkably close to his brother, Kili. You two joked around all the time. You sat together during the evenings, Kili would help you up on your horse/pony, he would take offer your watches and he even let you hold his bow and arrow. That is basically dwarven language for “I love you and I wish to court you” or “I love you and I’m so glad to have you in my family.”

- What Fili didn’t know is that Thorin told Kili about you being his One. But instead of teasing Fili about it, Kili had made it his duty to agitate his brother so much that he would have no choice but to confess to you before Kili would sneak you away.

- For your information: Kili had no intention of sneaking you away. He just wanted to make it look like it for Fili, and, lucky for him, you had just been going along with it subconsciously.

- But it did not agitate Fili. It made the poor lad confused and tired. You were showing so much affection and endearment to his brother that he felt like he could never compete. Even though Kili had never been attractive in dwarven standards, he knew his way around women. And seeing someone finally pay attention to him, made Fili happy for his brother.

- And Kili just kept up with the act. He was oblivious to what his brother was feeling. Thorin had quite specifically told Kili not to tell his brother, and for once, he didn’t. But when days turned into weeks, Kili made more advances. Not in any way uncomfortable for you, but they had been a step further.

- He would let you rest against him during night shifts, he would let his hand linger on your waist when he helped you get onto your horse/pony. This sneaky bastard even managed to toy with your hair.

- Fili grew absolutely devastated at these moments. He had distanced himself more and truly felt as if his One had been taken away and he would die alone.

- But then Mirkwood happened. It was obvious to Fili that his brother had taken a liking on Tauriel, the female elf that saved him earlier. You had been passed out of exhaustion in your cell, not paying attention to your surroundings anymore.

- And that was when Fili finally decided to speak.

- “What are you doing? I thought you liked Y/N and now you’re flirting with that elf? You can’t treat her like that!”

- And now Kili was confused.

- “I thought you liked Y/N?” He had questioned, not even knowing whether his uncle had been lying to him or not.

- “That doesn’t matter. What matters is, you can’t just run around-“ but Kili had already cut him off. “It does matter. Because Y/N isn’t my One. I’m not attracted to her!”

- And now Fili was dead silent. He had been contemplating on whether to act furious or taken aback. In reality, he had been a bit of both.

- “You don’t like Y/N?” Fili asked, nearly insulted.

- “I was only trying to agitate you. Uncle said she was your One but that you wouldn’t confess.” Kili admitted finally, knowing that keeping the act up any longer wouldn’t work.

- “So you tried to beat it out of me?” The only response the blonde got was a quiet hum.

- “You thought I would take away your chance of happiness?” Fili wondered aloud, his anger now showing more clearly. “Well, not if you put it like that-“ “How else am I supposed to put it?”

- With those words, the space grew quiet. One more question lingered on Fili’s mind, and he had to ask it.

- “Does she know you don’t like her?” A short pause was heard from Kili before he responded. “She does. When we grew closer she told me she wasn’t attracted to me and I told her she wasn’t my One.”

- A sigh of relief came Fili’s way, but his brother kept on talking. “She grew all confused by the concept of ‘Ones’. Had to give her a whole history lesson. She thinks it’s adorable. I’m sure she won’t reject you.” With those words, Fili’s ears pricked up.

- “How so?” “Because every time we are together, she won’t stop asking me about you.” Fili never thought someone could ever bring him more butterflies than when you smiled at him, but as Kili’s sentences reached him, his stomach felt all light again.

- “At first I thought it was because you were ignoring her, but I quickly figured out that wasn’t the case.” Kili shot a quick look his brother’s way, even though he had been in a cell on the other side of the hall. “She likes you, she really does. She’s not as good at hiding it as you are. If you ask her to court you, she won’t say no.”

- Fili had spent the entire night pondering over his brother’s words. Even as they escaped the dungeons and took the boat to Laketown, his anxiety bubbled up.

- But as soon as the orcs entered the city, reality sunk back in. They had been on the run while simultaneously claiming their homeland. There might be a chance neither of you would make it. And it terrified him.

- As you were busy holding off the orcs in Bard’s home, Fili had been right beside you covering your back. He knew asking you to court him would require more steps. Up until this moment you had only held a handful of conversations, but Fili was running out of patience.

- “When all this is over, I need you by my side.” He told you quickly, his voice heavy as he fenced off the attackers. You grew confused at your words, yet your actions did not falter one bit. And it only made Fili more attracted to you. How you maintained yourself on a battlefield, yet somehow managed to hold that perfect look. It could quite easily take his breath away.

- “But I am by your side.” You answered, not catching his meaning, thinking it had been too good to be true.

- “I mean by my side at Erebor. When we reclaim the mountain. Will you stay with me?” Upon your silence, Fili tried explaining his speech. “I know asking you to court me requires more steps but we might not have time for them anymore. I need you to stay with me. We can do all these steps afterwards, I promise.”

- You cast him a quick look before giving him a sincere nod. “I’ll stay with you.”

- And that is exactly what you did. Upon finally arriving at the mountain with the four dwarves, Fili finally got the time to braid your hair, even if Thorin told him to look for the Arkenstone. You had even managed to braid his hair too, even though you had no beads yet.

- Even as Thorin slowly grew insane, Fili had done what he promised; he remained by your side, defending you against his uncle and keeping you as safe as he could.

- During the battle of the five armies, you stayed with him and Kili. You traveled with the three of you, not once separating. Not even when Fili decided you should split up. Because of that, you managed to do quite a number on Azog before Thorin called out to him.

- Azog had gotten a good slash on your leg, nothing life threatening but enough to make you collapse on the spot. Fili had been so worried. He had promised to look out for you, but now you were bleeding out on the snow covered floor. Kili had already ran off for help, even though the possibility he would come back with one would be highly unlikely, as battle was still raging on.

- On top of Ravenhill everything had grown silent. Bodies of dead orcs were littered over the floor but all that mattered to Fili right now was you being safe. Eventually, Kili had ran back with Bilbo, Thorin and Gandalf by his side. They had successfully beaten Azog, finally putting an end to the bloodshed.

- As the mountain was being rebuilt, Oin had put you on bed rest to let your leg heal and Fili had been with you the entire time. Thorin hadn’t even tried to get him for royal duties. He knew he had been awful to you during his dragonsickness, and this was his way of apologizing to you. And you had been fine with it.

- When you had finally recovered, Kili took you to the forges to make beads for Fili. You wanted it to be a surprise for him, but you needed supervision. At first, Dis, Fili and Kili’s mother, had offered to help, but it had become her duty to distract the crown prince.

- A few burns and scratched had started to form on both your and Kili’s hands but it had been worth it. The beads were incredible.

- Fili was so happy when you gave them to him. He was so surprised by the amazing details and the thought and time your poured into them.

- He wears them the entire time. Now exceptions. Not even for bed or bath. None. They must always be in his hair.

- I WANNA WRITE MORE BUT IT’S ALREADY SO LONG BUT JUST ASSUME HE LOVES YOU SO MUCH AND WILL TREASURE YOU FOREVER AND LOVE YOU FOR EVERY LITTLE THING YOU DO

#Fili #Fili durin #tolkien #lord of the rings #the hobbit #the company #the company of thorin oakenshield #Fili x reader #Fili imagine

[candlelight27]

Reiner - NSFW Alphabet

Reiner x F!reader

A/N: I really wanted to write something for Reiner and this happened! I hope you enjoy it. I might have added way too much drama for a simple nsfw alphabet but I have so many strong feelings for Reiner that I CAN'T. I'm just a simp... Okay, so keep in mind I made this thinking of post-timeskip Reiner.

Warnings: NSFW, obviously. Smut, fluff, angst. Some kinks discussed.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

First things first, he’ll help you get cleaned up. He will either get a clean rug or you’ll share a shower. He won’t leave you alone, asking if you’re okay, if you need help, leaving several kisses on your shoulders and lips.

He’s rather emotional afterwards too. When you are lying on your bed in the dead of the night, he doesn’t understand how you are able to love him after all he’s done. He embraces your body and buries his face right in the crook of your neck. Reiner inhales your scent as you trace random patterns in the broad expanse of his back. He trembles in the slightest of manners, and you hear a faint sob, but you don’t say anything. You let him stay like that for as long as he likes. Sometimes it takes five minutes for him to calm down, while other times, it takes hours. But you don’t mind, and let his warmth surround you. He’s ever grateful of your love and carefulness. It’s not easy to forget all he’s done, and it’s even more difficult to accept he must live with the weight of his sins, so these moments of some kind of normality crush him. But you’re there, ready to help him.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He might be biased because of his training as the Armoured Titan, but he loves his arms and back. Reiner is strong and he uses it to his advantage. It makes him feel powerful and in control, more so when he has an opportunity in bed to show off his strength. He’s always elated when you absentmindedly caress his shoulders, arms and back.

Risking being vulgar, Reiner adores your ass. He takes a handful whenever he can – yes, even in public. If you wear something that accentuates your rear, the blond completely loses it, and it takes all his willpower not to kiss you and take you right there and then. During sex, it turns him on to see it, so he’s all into fucking in front of a mirror, or any position that lets him stare at your bum.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Reiner’s favourite place to cum is inside of you. He’s always a little scared, even with all the preventive measures, because the last thing he wants is getting you pregnant. Still, as a forbidden fruit, Reiner will enjoy every moment he’s releasing his seed inside of you, filling you to the brim. Unless you’ve gone a few rounds, Reiner’s cum is usually thick and abundant, always leaving a mess behind.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Reiner legit steals your underwear. He will regret it afterwards. But he does it anyways and more than once, he’s masturbated to your smell. To be fair, he would also steal other items that smell like you for those times you’re not around. Your scent helps him fall asleep and comforts him a lot.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He wasn’t that experience, although he had done the deed before. You live in a world where you could die in any moment, so he hasn’t held his urges that much. However, until he met you, he hadn’t let any of his previous partners see his most vulnerable side. Reiner always had that façade of confidence and assurance, that he always knew what he was doing, when in reality he was just faking it and hoping no one would notice. With you, that came to an end and he finally admitted he wasn’t as sure as he was supposed to be. Of course, it led you to a journey of exploration and you’d confidently say he’s now an expert. Reiner knows your body like the back of his hands, and he know exactly what to do to make you moan the way he likes. And of course, he’s an expert in making you cum whenever he wants, and for him, that’s enough experience.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

His favourite position is the one where you ride him with your ass facing him. He loves the view of your rear, that you can use him as you like for your own pleasure and that he can touch wherever he wants. He just sees advantages this way. Reiner would start eating you out while you were on all fours, getting you wet and ready for his cock. He’ll take his time as he savours your essence. Then, with his strong arms, he’d help you slide into his dick and grope your waist and your butt.

Since you often complain of him getting the best views, he’s committed to try as many positions as humanly possible. So, every other day, it’s an adventure.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

It really depends on Reiner’s humour. Sometimes, when sadness hits him, he just wants the solace of your body. During those times, he barely talks, and you answer to his silent pleas with actions rather than words. On the other hand, when he’s in a good mood, he loves teasing you. He’ll banter until you get slightly offended, all heated and cute, and then kiss you everywhere.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Reiner doesn’t have that much time to shave, so he just does labours of maintenance from time to time. And yes, the carpet matches the drapes. He’s got a dirty blond mop of hair down there.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

The blond gets too into it. He looks at you in the eye and smiles adoringly. He whispers sweet nothings in your ear when he’s embracing you, your skin on his. He repeats all the time how much he loves you, how amazing you are. Reiner’s the whole romantic package. It may backfire, though, because if it becomes too emotional, he might cry. He doesn’t believe he deserve any happiness, much less with you involved, so an uncontrollable, deep horror takes his heart until he can’t take it anymore. Thankfully, your reassuring words help him forget all those intrusive thoughts. You’re quite used to Reiner’s ups and downs, so it won’t ruin the mood that much, and you will continue your activities at some point during the night – or right away if Reiner insists.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

When he steals your underwear, it’s inside his coat’s pocket. Reiner takes them with one big hand, while the other goes to his girthy cock. He’s working on paperwork, most likely, and alone in his room or an office. He starts slowly pumping his dick up and down, turned on by your smell. Then, he thinks of the last time you were with him and his pace increases until he can’t take it anymore.

His favourite place to masturbate is the shower, though. His muscles relax under the hot water and he can let go all the tension that’s been accumulating there all day. Reiner can spend hours there. And he’s so kicked back, that his hands slowly roam his body and find his dick. He will lean against the wall, supporting himself with this free arm. His quiet moans get drowned by the noise of the shower, and he can take as long as he wants. So he strokes himself slowly, lazily into completion. One of the best parts is that he doesn’t have to clean all the mess he leaves, since he’s already under the running water. One of the worst parts is that he’s alone and, even though he enjoys it, but it’s not the same as being with a partner.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Is dry humping a kink? Because he adores it. Reiner loved watching your body rub against his with clothes on. This way, he can see how your face becomes more and more desperate for him to take you, and he loved the feel of being needed. So, yeah, he’s all into you both wherever you are – the chair, the sofa, the bed – making out, his tongue exploring your mouth, while you are riding his thigh, or your crotches rub together.

Reiner is into spanking, too. Not as a punishment. He’s just so turned on that he forgets all his manners and morals and spanks you sporadically. However, when the skin he’s hit turns red, he regrets it deeply. He feels bad, because it reminds him of all the harm he’s done, and you are always so loving… You like it anyways, so when you see the shadow of doubt grace his face, you reassure him that you enjoy it just as much as him. He still feels like a brute, but a happy one.

Finally, edging. Reiner has never had the reins of his own fate. Never. He became a warrior to please his mom and basically, his life has been determined by the decisions of other people. Most of the time, he feels helpless. Therefore, his love for edging roots in the control it grants him. He can decide when you are going to cum, when he’s going to give you your reward, and he loves that. It’s weird, because he’s not usually attracted by the idea of dominance over you, but this does it for him.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Truth be told, he’d make love to you anywhere. He likes the risk of both of you being caught, so I’d say an unfrequented yet public place. And he’ll never lock the doors, because there’s something appealing at someone seeing with their own two eyes that you love him, that he’s a great lover and that you chose him. He might be into exhibitionism a bit, but at the same time, he’s too shy to be open about it. In the end, he’ll try; Reiner kisses you deeply in the secluded but risky space, like the cleaning supplies closet, but just when things get heavy and sexy and you slide your hands to grab his dick, the blond proposes moving to somewhere more private. You’ll tease him a lot, and you’ll convince him to have sex in a place where you’ll get caught. On those rare occasions, you notice Reiner is hornier than usual. Actually, whenever you are in bed, just the fleeting mention of those episodes makes him lose his mind.

Other locations he enjoys, or rather pieces of furniture, are armchairs and sofas. The close contact it gives you, because you can’t lie down, makes him be able to reach any part of your body and cage you, so he’s all into it. Besides, it’s quite refreshing from always doing it on the bed. And it’s a plus if it’s not his or yours, for tainting an space that’s not yours adds to the spice and the fantasy.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Your whole self gets him going. You ass, mainly, but also your cute and gorgeous face, your voice, your body… When you dress up for him, it’s a treat. There’s no better gift. He can’t believe how lucky he is that someone like you loved him. Apart from those things, what gets him going is dirty talking. Mention his kinks and he’ll be up and ready to fulfil his duty. He’s filled with energy, love and anxiousness, so Reiner is nearly always up for sex.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Reiner is a bit possessive, so I think a threesome would be kind of a turn off, even though he might enjoy it if he tries it with someone he trusts. He’ll be reluctant to try toys, simply because the idea makes him all shy and uneasy.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Our favourite blond gives oral like a starved man. Your taste enticed him, and he can never get enough of you. He laps and laps all over your clit time after time, then lets his tongue roam inside your hole. At some point, he uses his fingers as well, because he doesn’t have the heart to tease you and wants to make you come. He’s going to give you more orgasms afterwards, so he won’t skimp on the pleasure he gives you.

There are few times in which you give him a blowjob and he’s not eating you out. During those rare occasions, he treats you as if you were made out of glass. His fingers caress your face and your hair delicately, and he tries staying as still as he can. Even when you scratch his thighs lightly, or play with his balls, he’ll behave, as disciplined as the soldier he is.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Reiner always starts slow and sensual, but it doesn’t last long. Not in the least. He gets impatient and once his mind is set and he sees you like it, his rhythm becomes relentless. It’s quite the experience, to be ravished in that way, but he can’t help it. Yet, in the rounds following the first one of the day, he’ll relax and control himself better. That’s when your most tender moments during sex are shared. He’s no longer chasing your high, but enjoying the moment, and you share loving words. This can last a lot, until you are oversensitive and cum because you’ve been at it for so long, you can’t take it anymore. Reiner, on the other hand, just comes at the same time because he can’t contain himself when you’re contracting around his cock.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He doesn’t like quickies. If there’s no other option, he’ll take it. Sometimes you can’t see each other as frequently, and you’ll have a mere hour together, so those are the occasions where he might accept a quickie, but it’s not his style. He needs his time to properly adore you. Otherwise, it leaves him cold a confused. Reiner considers quickies a bit soulless and he gets a bit paranoid that you’re distant or angry. Because of this, he prefers avoiding quickies altogether, because even though he knows those thoughts aren’t real, they make his heart ache even more in your absence.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Reiner likes to experiment different positions. He will try every position at least once – or almost any position. And he takes mental notes of the ones you enjoy the most, for real. Yet the only real risk he takes is having sex in semi public places, and it happens really far in between and at your constant begging. Reiner loves the idea of exhibitionism but can’t handle his shyness.

When it’s late at night, and you are in an office where anyone can enter, you kiss his lips with passion. He knows where this is going, and he’s torn. But your lips are so soft, and your hands roam across the muscles of his shoulders and arms… and he’s forgotten almost everything already. He’s sat on an armchair, so you climb onto his lap, straddling him with your legs. Your fingers begin to undo the buttons of his shirt, and his dick is already hard and pressed against your sex.

“What are you doing?”, he murmurs.

“Nothing”, you answer. You slowly sway your hips back and forth and Reinter lets out a moan. You let your tongue roam his mouth as you pull on the blond locks of his hair, then his hands find your waist. He’s squeezing you, and he answers to your movements with his own.

There are voices outside, but you don’t care. You undo his pants, and his dick breaks free. You discard your underwear, grunting at the lost of contact, but quickly come back to him.

“So?”, you tease.

“Let me have you already”, he sighs. You’ve caught him unarmed, and he’s ready to surrender. During the hour you are there, nobody interrupts you, but the noise outside is constant. You know he notices because his cock twitches every time. But you can see, at the same time, that he’s having way too much fun.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Reiner’s first round is usually the shortest, because he’s dying to have sex with you. Still, compared to other guys, it’s a long period of time. But once he’s come and breathe a bit, he wants more rounds. And this time, he’ll last much longer because he will be focused on enjoying all you have to offer instead of being overwhelmed with your presence. Reiner, all in all, is a guy with a lot of stamina, and being a warrior only enhances that aspect.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He doesn’t own toys and he’s reluctant to use them. You might be able to convince him little by little. First, you could introduce him with toys he can use with you… but it will take long and a lot of patience.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

You tease him way more that he does tease you. Instead, he loves to spoil you, and even when he’s edging you, if you plead way too much, he’ll let you come. He’s got a heart of gold deep inside, and he can’t avoid not giving you something you want. Reiner’s just like that, attentive and helpful.

He enjoys teasing you with words, though. And he’ll tease you about every little thing you can think of. Until he finds a certain aspect that particularly irritates you, which he will use to his own benefit. He loves when you seem angry, but can’t resist his advances.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He’s usually silent, releasing a moan here or there. But he will dirty talk a lot, so be ready. He starts with obscene sentences, but he softens and ends up being a flustered mess saying loving words. But the things he says, corny or not, do turn you on.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Modern AU! Reiner is not the kind of guy to send dick pics. However, the first time you were sexting, he sent a video without a warning. You hadn’t even sent each other a picture, so it caught you by surprise. It was incredibly sexy, as he was caressing his dick through his underwear, then taking it out and pumping it up and down. However, it took a few minutes to reach, which were enough to make Reiner paranoid. He started apologizing, until you phoned him and told him to come to your place right away.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Reiner is not the longest, but he’s thick. And when I mean thick, I mean that he has to make an effort to make you wet and ready for him. You love it, because it fills you completely and you can feel every little movement, so the stimulation washes over your whole body. He’s very confident in the way he makes you feel, so he likes his size. It’s also slightly curved upwards and a bit to the right, and his head is bright pink. He has foreskin and there’s a big vein gracing the left side. He’s never really thought about his dick at any level – he hasn’t done that thing of comparing his prick to his friends’ – but he can feel his heart swell with pride when you compliment him and praise him, and when you worship him with your mouth.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

This man always wants sex. Unless he’s really, really sad, in which case he needs a good hug… and it sometimes leads to sex because your body pressed against his own and he can’t control his urges. Fortunately, you’re almost always as needy as him.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Reiner has a lot of troubles falling asleep. You’re more likely to drift off first. He’s always dwelling on something, but he won’t be anxious. Instead, when your asleep right next to him, even if he’s awake, he feels calm and a sense of peace.

#reiner x reader #reiner x female reader #reiner smut #aot x reader #snk x reader #reiner braun

[welllpthisishappening]

falling feels like flying ['til the bone crush]

Someone should revoke her title. 

They’re trying, Emma supposes. Inevitable death probably means people can’t call her savior anymore, but they shouldn’t call her that now and that’s almost entirely because of what an absolute and complete liar she is. Telling Killian she would have done the same after he admitted he didn’t get rid of the shears isn’t her most massive lie, although it might be her most ridiculous. And they both know it’s not true. She wouldn’t do the same thing, she has. More than once. 

AN: That gif has nothing to do with the story! Here is approximately 3.5K where I once again force Emma and Killian to acknowledge their trauma. Not in the Underworld this time, though! So maybe we’re all evolving here. I blame this gif set, which I saw this morning and felt compelled to write something about. Maybe that evolution is also a lie, actually. 

———

“I lied.” Killian hums, exhaustion clinging to the sound, and Emma understands that. Less so why she’s talking right now, but neither one of those words seemed particularly interested in preserving the quiet calm of this particular moment, and she’s never been a lightweight quite like this. In more ways than one, she supposes. Hazy thoughts drift through her brain, muddled as it is by buttered rum and the steady flicker of flames in the fireplace because naturally this is the sort of house that has multiple fireplaces, and she burrows her face closer. 

To Killian’s chest. 

Takes a deep breath, not quite slow, but maybe a little greedy, and they ordered both things. Pizza and Chinese, half-finished egg rolls and beheaded slices of cheese with extra peppers strewn across the coffee table because Emma always likes that extra bit of crust and Killian’s nothing if not a frustratingly endearing sort of pushover. 

With her, especially. 

She closes her eyes. 

“I lied,” Emma repeats, “in the hospital, I mean. Wrong verb tense.” “You’re not making any sense at all, darling.”

Her nose must be cold — if the way Killian tenses as soon as it brushes his skin is any indication, but Emma knows it’s far more than that and far deeper than that and she might be the world’s biggest idiot. Looming death does that to a person, she supposes. 

Breathing isn’t particularly easy. And that’s not only because she ate four pizza slices worth of crust. Still, using death as an excuse again seems like an emotional crutch and an unreasonable reason, her muddled mind capable of clinging to every single letter in that particular endearment. It might be her favorite. 

She’s not sure she’s ever told him that. 

Stupid, really. 

“I told you that I get it; what you did today, and that part’s definitely true. But, uh, the rest of it. That I would have done the same thing? Total lie, right? I mean, I did it. That’s what happened.” Nothing. Just flickering flames and the quiet hum of a TV, neither one of them has been interested in actually watching all night. Emma doesn’t even know what channel they’re on. For all she knows, the remote’s in the kitchen. 

She counts inhales. Tries to keep her exhales measured, most of her face still pressed into the collar of Killian’s shirt as it is. And it takes about five full seconds before his hand moves, starts tracing a calm line up her spine, following that path until he reaches the base of her neck and the goosebumps that have already exploded on her skin and oxygen is overrated anyway. Holding her breath as soon as his fingers card through the ends of hair is basically instinct at this point. 

“Felt wrong to point that out at the time,” he mutters, “all things considered.” “Been kind of a long day.” “Reuniting with long-lost relatives will do that.” Scoffing is not the best reaction. Nothing about this is funny. Includes far too much death and dismay, and Emma’s gaze flickers up. Of its own accord and something much deeper, like the absolute refusal to accept a world where he does not exist. 

Goddamn Captain Hook. 

She loves him so much sometimes she thinks she’ll simply burst with the force of it all. 

It’s a gross thought, honestly. 

And they’ve already spent far too much time in the hospital today.

“Is he ok? Li—” Cutting herself off, Emma grits her teeth, but one side of Killian’s mouth is already tugging up, and the kiss that lands on her forehead is as soft as anything. Maybe bursting isn’t so bad, actually. So long as she can come up with another word for it. “God, that’s so weird.” Killian hums. “Indeed.” “Thoughts, feelings, et cetera?” “Vast. And none of them particularly pleasant.” “Seems fair. That sort of day, huh?” “Indeed.” They need more blankets. Need more things that are theirs in a collective sort of way, but that’s a dangerous and disingenuous train of thought, and Emma’s fingers twitch towards the fire. To ward off the sudden chill that’s settled between her shoulder blades, and it almost works, but it does absolutely nothing to help the sway of her stomach and the acid lingering in the back of her throat, threatening to burn far more than what these meager flames are able to do. 

“Should have finished high school,” Emma mumbles, “then I could choose more accurate verb tenses from my inevitably vast vocabulary. Did. Have done. Would do again, several thousand times over.”

“That’s the future tense.” None of his words come with any kind of pointed emotion, but Emma hears it all the same. Can see the tightness that lingers in the corners of his mouth and the way he’s holding his shoulders, straight as a line, and some joke about rigging that she no intention of making, and the furrow between his brows makes every muscle in her chest twist. Ache too, for good measure. 

With the promise of everything she wants to say and everything she hasn’t or can’t and—

Fuck magic, quite honestly. And the rules no one’s bothered to mention until now. Seems like poor planning on everybody’s part. 

“You heard me.” “I did,” Killian agrees lightly, and his hand has never actually stopped moving. It’s nice. Steady. Something Emma can almost nearly time her breathing too. “I would also choose that particular tense. If given the choice, that is.” “Do you not think you have that?” “I don’t particularly enjoy the thought. I’m rather partial to the option of whim, you see. Pirate and all that. We don’t much abide by schedules and fated decision.” “Seems like it’d be in the by-laws.” “Well, by-laws by their very nature are rather contradictory to the entire pirate notion, but you’ve got the gist of it at least.” Emma laughs. Doesn’t quite regret the sound, even as out of place as it is — just presses it into the edge of Killian’s shirt and the buttons he never bothers to do, trying to brandh the smell of him and the feel of him into every corner of her memory and she’s not really sure what happens after. Once the prophecy is fulfilled, and all that. 

She’s got too much unfinished business. 

To totally leave this particular plane of reality. 

She doesn’t mention that either. Not when the crux of that business is breathing steadily under her hand, and Emma can’t remember when she moved her hand, only that Killian’s warm under her touch, and he’s always so much warmer. Than just about anything else she’s aware of. 

“I thought you were dead.”

Of all the things Emma expects to happen in the midst of this night and this moment — and it’s really not a very long list, admittedly — that did not even make the cut. Wasn’t a consideration or a fledgling idea in the back of her mind, several different vertebrae almost audibly objecting when she jerks her head up. To find Killian staring straight ahead, lips not much more than a thin line across his face. 

Seriously, the rigging jokes almost write themselves. Which is more than Emma can say about her clearly piece of shit list, as metaphorical as it might be. 

“I don’t—” “—When I saw you,” Killian interrupts, and none of the words shake. Come out like a stream of consciousness and memories neither one of them have able to shake yet. Or talk about. Can’t possibly be healthy. “Chained to that stone, blood dripping into my mouth, and then all of a sudden, there you were. Worried I’d simply dreamt you up, couldn’t imagine how you looked quite that lovely in that hell hole, otherwise.” “Oh, that’s kind of insulting, actually.” “Hair like the bloody sun.” “Better,” Emma murmurs. Reaching up, her fingers tangle with the charms around his neck. Pieces of luck and trinkets she hasn’t learned all the stories to yet. The idea that she won’t makes her nauseous. “You told me ‘you shouldn’t be here.’” “Aye, and I meant it.” “Because you thought…” “Living people don’t often appear in such a God awful place, do they? Not without something tragic happening, and my mind was impressively efficient on that front.” “Which one is that?” “Every threat that’s ever lingered, every person I would have gladly run through if it meant you were safe. Half of goddamn Camelot.” Emma might snicker. Killian’s arm tightens, though. And that’s all she’s really worried about. “I think I could have taken Arthur. Y’know if it had come to that.” “Likely not a very good swordsman,” Killian nods, but that’s only so his lips can trace Emma’s temple and the top of her hair. More than once. Like he’s still making sure. “Pampered prince—” “—He was totally a king, babe. That’s like...the most basic Camelot knowledge.” “Ask me in five minutes if I care at all about anything to do with Camelot.” “Should I time it, or…” He scoffs. Presses another half dozen kisses to any spot he can reach, and he can actually reach a fair amount of places. Emma’s impressed. Swooning too, but also pretty impressed. “I kept thinking about you,” Killian says, softer than the last few words have been, and it sounds like an admission and another promise, and it’s weird that it can be both. At the same time. “This house. What it was and wasn’t. All those possible verb tenses.”

“I’m sorry.” “Ah, that’s not your fault, love. None of this is, really, but—well, it did make it so seeing you, realizing you were there...left all of those thoughts crashing down around my ears, so to speak. Falling apart, like an avalanche of what hadn’t been and what I still wanted so desperately. No matter what Hades did.” “Stupid stubborn.” “I believe there’s something about a pot and a kettle in this realm.” “Don’t have that cliche in the Enchanted Forest, huh?” “Not that I’m aware of, no.” “Maybe you just didn’t go to a good college.” “Tell me every Greek word you know,” Killian challenges, and Emma rolls her eyes. Ignores the first few flutters of a headache brewing at the base of her skull. “It didn’t seem fair.” “Which part?” “All of it is also rather vast, but mostly that if you were there, then it happened again.” Narrowing her eyes, Emma tries to piece together those letters and the syllables they make, only to be marginally annoyed when she can’t make sense of them. Killian kisses the bridge of her nose. 

She might have to go get Tylenol soon. 

“Losing you without fighting, without challenge the goddamn reaper myself, was worse than anything He could have done,” Killian continues, and he doesn’t have to be more specific. “Worse than whatever pain I’ve ever suffered. Cut off twenty more limbs; it wouldn’t even come close.” “Do you have that many?” “Your humor lacks a little something; you know that, Swan?” “It’s a defense mechanism.” He noses at her hair. Drags the soft hum of what could very well be either an agreement or the opposite, or maybe even the sort of deep-rooted understanding that’s allowed him to sneak his way into the center of everything, across her skin. The specifics don’t matter, only that Emma’s magic roars under her skin, an inferno, and a symphony, meeting the challenge that no one has really laid down yet. 

“Do that again,” Killian mutters, a low chuckle as Emma’s scratches at his side. 

“I’m not sure I can, honestly.” “Pity.” “Something like that, yeah. And you’re not totally right, you know?” “Ah, and that’s almost rude.” “I’m serious,” Emma says, “that’s—none of that was your fault either.” Tilting his head only ensures that several strands of hair he still hasn’t bothered to cut fall almost artfully across his forehead, and Emma is grateful to a variety of gods, Greek or otherwise, that Killian doesn’t mention how much her hand shakes. When she tries to brushes them away. His hook finds her wrist instead, cool metal against freezing cold skin, and the state of her tongue is going to be a problem. Large as it is in Emma’s mouth, making it all but impossible to properly swallow while Killian’s lips sweep the bend of her knuckles. 

“Charmer.” “Aye, that’s my endgame.” There’s not enough room between them for him to run his hand across his face like Emma knows he wants to, and part of that isn’t really a bad thing, but the rest just seems like another entirely unfair thing, and Emma knows the rest is coming. Makes tears burn her eyes all the same. “They were just...gone, you understand? No chance to do anything about it. One moment they were living and breathing. Then Liam was dead. Slumped in my arms in the corner of a cabin he was supposed to spend the rest of his career in. He—he would have been a very good captain.” “So are you,” Emma says, fierce and determined, and Killian kisses in the inside of her palm. She’s moved her hand again. To cup his cheek. 

“For a time, maybe. But then she was gone too, and I thought I could feel it, you know. The exact way her heart crumbled in his hand, tiny bits of dust that I never wanted to blow off the deck. Like some of her still managed to stay. Is that—” The muscles in his throat move, jaw clenching, and Emma has to blink. She hopes the moisture on her cheeks isn’t tears. She’s not sure what’s a better option, really. “Must sound daft.” “No. I—I get that too.” “Do you?” “Not the only one who’s watched Rumplestilskin hold the heart of someone you loved.”

He can’t be holding his breath. His chest is moving much too quickly, but the burst of air that all but flies out of Killian is enough to ruffle the ends of Emma’s hair and possibly even dry some of the tears she’s still refusing to acknowledge, and she can’t get closer to him. 

She makes an admirable effort all the same. 

Like occupying the same few inches of space will ensure that she stays there. 

“Did you—” Killian starts, looking almost pained as the words war for his voice on the tip of his tongue. “Did you like her?” That didn’t make the list, either. It’s entirely possible that Emma is just garbage at making lists. She nods. “Anyone who loves you as much as I do is fine with me. Better than, even.”

His expression shifts again. Light lingers in his gaze, cautious hope, and misplaced optimism, gears whirring in his head that Emma can’t almost convince herself she hears. Her verb tense was on purpose that time. 

That’s a confidence boost, all things considered.

“She was something fierce,” Killian says, sounding reminiscent and not as sad as Emma has worried he must be. “Once she got away from him. Could get a grown man to do her bidding with a single look, the kind of glare that’d set you on fire from the inside out. It was—they loved her too. Men on the ship, would have followed her to the ends of the Earth if she’d asked. Probably even if she hadn’t.” 

His next inhale becomes an exhale almost immediately.

“She never would have asked,” Killian adds, almost entirely to himself, but then his eyes are back on Emma, and they’re a little glossy and just as blue and she’s holding her breath now. “She liked you too, I know it.” “I think she thought I was crazy, actually. Gold didn’t really have much tact in the...introductions.” “Ah.” “Right?” “Right,” he echoes, a pale imitation of her voice that makes Emma’s cheeks ache. From smiling. Legitimately smiling. Huh. “But I suppose that’s part of it, though. She was there again, and I—” “—I’m sorry. For...for all of it.” “Still not your fault, love.”

“How did you know?” she asks, and her voice doesn’t sound much like her either. Wobbles and warbles and some other word that fits the alliteration. “About me. And not being…”

“Dead?” Killian’s eyebrows jump. “Strawberries.” “Excuse me?” “That soap you use in your hair. Smells like strawberries, or strawberry adjacent maybe. Manufactured just a bit. I think it’s my favorite smell in the world.” “Backhanded compliment.” “No, no,” Killian shakes his head. His hair moves again. “It’s not. It’s—well, it’s you, love. Smells like everything that you are and—”

“—I’m manufactured?” “If you let me finish,” he chides, and Emma all but yanks her lips behind her teeth, “It smells like home. Smells like falling asleep next to you and a distinct lack of blankets.” He nips at the tip of her nose. She scoffs again; that’s why. “And your distractingly cold feet, and leather jackets, and how the smell clings to the collars, no matter how long it’s been since you’ve worn them. Lingers on your pillow too, and the fronts of my shirt. You fall asleep against me quite often, you know that.” “Can sleep anywhere,” Emma reasons. “Might be my greatest talent.” “I don’t know about that.” “If I call you charmer again, will you hold it against me for lack of synonyms?” “Tell me how charming I am again.” Emma scrunches her nose. “Now it sounds like my dad.” “Let’s leave the prince out of this. He’s only a prince, aye?” “Far as I know, yeah.” “Good, good. Strawberries, love. Touching you helped too, though. If we’re being frank.” “Anything except blunt force honesty seems silly now, doesn’t it?” Killian nods. Slow and measured, like anything else will snap this tenuous peace, and maybe they can just sleep on the couch. Getting up is an impossible prospect right now. Maybe they can make out a little before they fall asleep. 

“It’s a very big house,” Emma whispers, and they should really figure out a schedule for conversations like this. Talking about it all at once is exhausting. 

“It is.” “You don’t want to expand upon that?” “Oh, I want a great number of things I shouldn’t,” Killian admits, “but as much as I appreciate this fresh round of honesty we’re engaging in, the false hope would—” “—There’s no such thing,” Emma interrupts. “False hope. It’s an oxymoron, ask my mother. And I think you should get some sort of crew again.” “How would you suggest I populate such a thing?” She shrugs. Nearly hits Killian in the chin in the process. “Untold stories. Dwarves.” “I will not have dwarves on my ship.” “See, I knew you’d have opinions. And there was a possessive pronoun in there that time.” “Was there not before?” “No,” she says. “Just called it the ship. Like it’s not the most important thing you have.” “Well, it’s not.” Emma’s cheeks warm. “That was very smooth.” “Someone did guarantee I was a very good captain earlier.” Space continues to be relatively minimal between them, but Killian’s nothing if not adaptable, and he works with what he’s got. Swinging Emma’s legs perpendicular over his, she’s nearly sitting on his lap, an arm slung over his shoulders, which makes it even easier to get her fingers into his hair and his head to rest against hers, and he takes another deep breath. “I know you understand, Emma,” he says, soft and serious, and she doesn’t bother doing anything except cling to him. With everything she’s got left. “All of it, from the very start. So I don’t think I’ll apologize, actually. For what I’ve done, or what I’d still be willing to do. I won’t give up on you, do you understand me?” “Didn’t,” Emma says, only a little optimistic that’s the right verb tense. Maybe she can get her GED, or something. Before all of this ends. “In Camelot, or after. Accept or acknowledge, and I probably would have—” 

Announcing that killing Gold for what he’d done to Killian regularly crossed her mind in the twenty-four hours or so before they finally made it to the Underworld doesn’t really have the right sentiment for this conversation. Far too violent, and just as honest. 

She’d consider killing him now, too. 

For everything he’s doing, and everything he hasn’t, and she should have shoved him in that river. 

Killian doesn’t smile. At least not in a way that reaches his eyes, the same ones that are looking at Emma again, all blue and earnest, and his shoulders shift. When her fingers graze his chin, more than stubble there because, she imagines, spending a day or so underwater with a sibling he only sort of wants and kind of knows doesn’t leave much time for facial-type grooming. 

It’s a good look, though. 

Most of them are, in Emma’s experience. 

“This entire time,” she continues, “you haven’t given up on me yet.” “Works both ways, darling.” “That one crosses realms, huh?” “Pick up things spending so much time with you.” There’s nothing extra in the words. No sap-filled sentiment or promises she’s only a little hopeful will become actions. And they haven’t talked about the rest; might not even have time, but Emma will let herself think about all these empty rooms anyway, of the exact shade Killian’s eyes go when he stands at the helm, and she hopes he doesn’t cut his hair. Not yet, at least. Longer strands make it easier to touch him, to leave a lasting mark, and settle into his center the same way he’s taken root in hers. 

They fall asleep on the couch. 

#cs ff #captain swan #cs fic #captain swan fic #captain swan ff #laura writes canon #force characters to talk 2k4ever #also remember when i wanted to write about killian not getting to see milah in the underworld? #have some of that here too #just for fun

[no-whump-on-main]

Elora Series-2

Back at it again with part 2!!

I am slightly sleep deprived excuse grammatical errors.

TWs: mention of drugging, possessive whumper.

     Clyde Anderson wasn’t an idiot.

     He was reckless, maybe, and a little crazy, but he wasn’t an idiot. He had left a completely clean crime scene; not a single strand of hair was left behind, not a single lost eyelash, nothing. As soon as Elora finally gave in and passed out, he took the SIM card out of her phone and crushed it to bits with his foot, though he kept the device itself to dispose of farther away. It didn’t take him long at all to secure her wrists and ankles with thick rope, just to ensure she couldn’t try anything in the off chance that she woke up before they reached their destination. Once she was tied up properly, he shoved her and her bag into the trunk before getting back into the driver’s seat and speeding off.

     The drive was long, but not terribly so; it was just about two hours, driven straight through. That was another of the geniuses to his plan; they’d be crossing state lines, twice. That, on top of the squeaky clean scene, made Clyde confident that the police wouldn’t have even the slightest chance of ever finding Elora. 

     In all honesty, he didn’t know what he was going to do with her. He had a couple of plans, but after that, he was lost. It didn’t seem plausible to keep her forever, but a body to hide would complicate things even further. He could let her go, eventually, but he’d have to rough her up pretty bad to scare her out of telling anyone about him.

     Overthinking was a demon. That was a problem to be dealt with later. All he knew at the moment was that he had to have her, and now he did.

     Ever since some drunk guy at the bar started rambling to him the wretched bitch who killed his niece, curiosity had eaten at his soul, itching to know more. They became newfound drinking buddies, and he pressed the other man for details every night out for weeks, yet somehow came off without any suspicion. Clyde asked for all sorts of things-her name, where she was from, how she knew his niece-and Dante always answered without question. 

     The gist of the story he was given was that Dante’s niece, Wren, had been dating this girl for years, which he had never liked in the first place, but one day, when they were sixteen, she took Wren up a mountain and killed her. Clyde had a feeling that wasn’t the entire story, but he truly didn’t care. His fascination was with the Elora, not what she’d done three years ago.

     He truly didn’t need much information from Dante, anyways. After a few basic questions, he got everything else he needed from facebook stalking.

     And now he’d been watching her for almost five months.

    It still felt surreal that he’d finally talked  himself into biting back his worries and taking her. He couldn’t explain his feelings about the situation if his life depended on it, but something felt so viscerally right now that she was finally with him, just a few feet away in the trunk.  It was as if Elora had always belonged to him, and now things were just as they were supposed to be. 

     He had her. He finally fucking had her.

     About thirty miles away from where he grabbed her, he tossed her SIM-cardless phone out of the window into a soaked ditch on the side of the road. Even if the device was recovered, it wouldn’t have a chance of turning on after soaking in rainwater for so long. 

     The rest of the drive passed uneventfully, just as Clyde had hoped. He never stopped once, and was incredibly careful to drive lawfully so as to not attract the attention of any cops.

      Their final destination was a shitty apartment in an even shittier town in Connecticut. The name Pleasant Park Apartments poorly hid the harsh reality of asbestos-filled walls, cigarette butts lining the sidewalks like snow, and neighbors who were either always too high to give a shit about anything or just naturally apathetic on their own. Clyde had been there for seven years, and was numb to the conditions at this point. He used to live in a nice condo on the better side of town, but after some bitch that couldn’t take a damn joke got fired from his job as a mechanic that paid a pretty penny, he couldn’t afford it anymore. His new job as an insurance agent hardly covered rent for the shithole he had now, but it was all that he could get. At least the coworkers weren’t shit.

     After parking the sedan close to his building, Clyde took Elora’s bag out of the trunk and slung it over his shoulder, then proceeded to lift her out of the trunk, holding her beneath her knees and around her back in a bridal carry. She was still completely limp, her body almost jelly-like in its unconscious state. He didn’t anticipate just how heavy she’d feel when he had to carry her up three flights of stairs. By the time he put his key in the door of apartment 307, he was panting heavily, more than ready to drop her in the bathroom prison he’d already prepared for her. 

     The bathroom was obviously not an ideal location; a basement would have been preferable, but in a two bed two bath apartment, there wasn’t another place to put her. The spare bedroom was too close to the outside and had windows-what if a cop patrolling around looking for druggies heard her, or she lifted the blinds to signal for help? The master bath and bedroom weren’t options for the same reason, and neither were the kitchen or the living room, with far too much open space to properly contain Elora. That left the small guest bathroom in the hallway; the door to it was directly across from the front door of the apartment, but that was the only negative. It didn’t have any external walls, and was easy to rig into somewhat of a cell.

     It wasn’t anything fancy, but it wasn’t awful, either. Clyde had never used it, sticking to the master, so it was clean, but the decor was straight out of the eighties, with yellowing floral wallpaper and a big white mat that had begun to grow mold from the surrounding humidity in the center of the room. The bathtub was straight ahead from the door, and the very clearly aged toilet and vanity were along the right wall, lining up with the showerhead. 

     Clyde did indeed drop Elora, kicking the door closed behind himself then immediately heading over to the bathroom and all but tossing her into the tub. He flinched, though, at the sound of her head smacking against the hard tile that lined the side walls. That was probably overkill-even he knew that.

     He didn’t have time to fuss over it, though. He didn’t know how much time he had until she woke up. 

     A week prior to the kidnapping, he’d purchased a length of heavy duty chain and a few padlocks from a local store. With a bit of ingenuity, he figured out a way to rig them to the bathtub’s faucet without having to install any sort of extra hardware into the walls to prevent them from slipping off. All it took was the tension of looping them around both the faucet and the handle that controlled the water and a few extra wraps around; after being secured with several padlocks, there wasn’t a single plausible way for the chains to be pulled off of the wall. All he had to do after that was secure the loose end of the chain to a pair of handcuffs with another padlock, and he had all he needed to keep Elora exactly where he wanted her to be.

     He untied the ropes from her hands and feet, replacing those around her hands with the cuffs. He didn’t worry about securing her feet in any way, as the amount of chain left after the jerry-rigged suspension between the handle and faucet was so short that she would have to hunch over to stand, anyways. She wouldn’t be able to go far with that.

     He double-checked everything before leaving the bathroom, each padlock, each individual chain link, and the bathroom itself for any hazards that could be within her reach. There were none. Everything was utterly perfect.

     Satisfied, Clyde turned off the lights, closed the door, and headed into his bedroom which was just a door away down the hallway, a gleeful smile on his face.

-

     Elora awoke slowly, in several stages. At first, she couldn’t even tell that she was waking up at all, as wherever she was, it was pitch black. She then realized that she was in fact somewhere, and that somewhere was unfamiliar. She bolted upright with a start. Her head ached horribly from the sudden motion and she flinched, sucking in a loud breath. Ow, shit. Confusion then hit her. Where was she?

     The memories came next. She jerked her wrists back abruptly and heard the clanking of metal, feeling tightness around her wrists as something resisted them moving. It kept them together when she tried to pull them apart, as well..handcuffs?

     Her first instinct was to scream and jerk as much as she could, fighting chains that she couldn’t even see. She thrashed as hard as she could, her throat feeling raw as she screamed for what felt like an hour.

     Soon, though, she fell silent. Dead silent. She swore she could hear footsteps, and they were getting louder. Maybe someone was coming to help her? This could all be a huge misunderstanding.

     A door she didn’t even know was there opened and she held her breath. A small amount of light came into the room, but it seemed to be dark outside of wherever she was, too.

     She watched as a shadowy figure reached into the room, flipping a light switch. Bright fluorescent lights crackled on immediately, and Elora blinked, her eyes having become accustomed to the darkness.

     She whipped her head around to look at the figure after her eyes adjusted. They panned to his face, first; he was a man, with a scraggly goatee and brown hair that looked like it hadn’t been washed or cut in a long time. His eyes were brown, the whites bloodshot. She could see it in his face that he was slightly overweight, and his skin had an almost-sunburned appearance despite it being the middle of November.

     His mouth started moving. He was speaking. His voice was rough and loud.

     “Hello.”

     Elora’s eyes then panned down to his body. She recognized the clothes he was wearing. She recognized them. It had been too dark to make out his face when she was being kidnapped, but she remembered his clothes. A gray tee shirt and straight-leg jeans. He took her. He was the one. He-

     She began screaming again, and then she heard him laugh at the sound of her cries.

Tags: @exploringspaceinpyjamas

#elora #elora larkin #new series #elora series #no whump on main #whump #whump fic #whump oc #whump writing #My writing #whumper #creepy whumper #possessive whumper #lady whump #physical whump #kidnapping #psychological whump

[cutesuki--bakugou]

Ancient Soul

Time Travel, Quirkless, Feudal Japan AU

“Your soul does not belong here.” Those were words you never thought that you would hear. Now, thrown into the past in feudal Japan, you must find a way to survive, all while struggling to avoid the growing feelings for one hot-headed war general. War, romance, death and love drive you forward, to find the place where your soul truly belongs.

Bakugou Katsuki x Fem!Reader

Want to start from be beginning? Check the Ancient Soul tag. New chapters released every Wednesday as long as schedule permits.

Genre: Romance / Angst Story Rating: Explicit | Adult Themes, Sex, Death, Depictions of Violence, Alcohol

Chapter 21: Revelation

Chapter Rating: Teen | Cursing, Depictions of Death and Injuries Words:  2989

The kitten truly was great company to you while Bakugou was gone, as it never left your immediate vicinity, even waking up to follow you around the palace. It calmed you to have constant companionship, though you still found yourself missing your lover severely by the time he was supposed to return. You knew what he had to do was important, as dangerous as it may be, and you had done everything you could to try and just accept that. Still, there was a selfishness that you couldn’t quite rid yourself of. The time that you had together was limited, and no matter how much you tried to hide that sinking reality from your thoughts, it was impossible. 

A week late from returning home, you couldn’t stop the churning feeling in your gut that was telling you something just wasn’t right. This delay was familiar to you, but not because it had happened before. Never once had he been held back or had any issues, so maybe that is what was making you so nervous. That, or it could be that this was one of the first signs of impending doom that you just refused to recognize. Because, if it was true and this was that exact delay that prevented the palace from being properly prepared for the attack, then that means there was no more than five months left. 

Five months might not seem like a long time, but in this world where nothing was quick and simple, it was no time at all. On top of that, the entire five months weren’t guaranteed. You didn’t know when exactly the attack would happen at this point. There needed to be more proof, more circumstances and actions that were more concrete signs before you made any assumptions or decisions. But, with only your feline friend to keep you company while you waited for your lovers return, you couldn’t help your mind from spiraling. 

When the bell finally rang through the air signaling their return, you were quick to make your way down to the stables. Although you were excited that they had finally gotten back, what you weren’t expecting was the severity of their condition. 

Many soldiers had already collapsed from exhaustion, and from what you could tell, their ranks had been demolished to less than half. The many injured survivors tried to help those who were near death, and the healthy were left to carry supplies, shuffling about on sore feet and aching limbs. And, in the middle of it all, you saw the fluffy blonde head of your lover, using one arm to direct while the other helped support him on a makeshift crutch. 

The urge to run to his side immediately was almost unbearable, but you knew better than to get in the middle of his work. Injured or not, Bakugou never left his troops until everything was taken care of. Right now, that meant sectioning off the injured for care, dumping off supplies, and leaving what little of the dead they had been able to bring home off to the side in preparation for burial. As you watched, stomach rolling and bubbling nervously as you worried about the state of Bakugou’s own injuries, you could see his generals all doing just as he was.

None of them seemed to be in any dire state, except for Kaminari, who was squatting amongst the injured with many bandages wrapped around his head and over one eye. Even with his injuries, he was still checking on each man, deeming who was in immediate need of attention before commanding some of the healthy to take them to the infirmary first. Kirishima, Ashido and Sero were all over the place doing this or that, and in that moment, you wished that you could help. 

A presence beside you made you nearly jump out of your skin, looking up at Midoriya’s worried, freckled face. “A-ah, Midoriya, you scared me!” 

“Sorry!” Midoriya’s cheeks flushed a bit at his mistake, giving you a wary smile as he reached up to rub the back of his head. “I had called you, but I suppose you didn’t hear me.” 

“No, I’m… I’m distracted, I guess.” Looking back out at Bakugou, you noticed that he had paused his yelling and commands for a moment, speaking quietly to Kirishima. “He looks injured, but I can’t tell since he hasn’t turned to face me yet…” 

“Their last report had said that they had failed, but it had been written so quickly that there weren’t many details… But this is severe. He’s never lost this badly before. Did… you know this was going to happen?” Although his voice was timid, as it usually was, you could hear a hint of blame behind his curious concern. Frowning, you gave a small shake of your head, keeping control of your emotions so that you didn’t snap at him. He was a much higher ranking than Bakugou, and though he was incredibly informal, you knew that it wouldn’t be good to argue. 

“No, I hadn’t been able to see the severity of the loss… But I had warned him that it was going to happen. He didn’t… say anything?” 

“He did mention that, but I think that his arrogance got in the way of taking your warning seriously. Until I hear the official report, though, I can’t say-- ah, Kacchan!” With Midoriya’s cry of concern, you saw Bakugou nearly collapse, only held up by Kirishima’s quick reactions. No longer caring about staying out of the way, you were quick to run to his side, supporting him from his other side to help him keep his footing. 

“Katsuki, you need to rest--” Your own gasp interrupted you as you could finally see the severity of his injuries, or at least, what was covering them. His robes were basically in shreds, the huge gap and tears in them revealing a cloth bandage that wrapped around his abdomen all the way down to his right knee. It was stained and dirty, with blood, dirt, and who knows what else. The pattern of the blood gave away what shape his wounds must have been in, as the line went across his stomach and down his thigh. He had many other injuries that were left uncovered, but they were minor. This large wound, however, was life threatening, and you couldn’t believe that he had still been standing and commanding troops all this time. 

“I don’t need to rest. Both of you get off me!” With a shove, Bakugou pushed Kirishima off him, though he couldn’t quite do the same since you were on his injured side. Frowning, you knew better than to take the command personally, able to see just how frustrated he was at himself. You could tell that, outside of what excruciating pain he must have been in, he was humiliated. Bakugou took his work very seriously, and he prided himself in taking charge and losing very few battles during his entire career. But this wasn’t just a simple loss. This was a powerful, crippling blow. 

Able to feel him trembling from head to toe, you kept yourself beside him, giving him further support to his weakened side. “No, Katsuki, that’s enough now. Kiri and the others can take it from here, you can’t push yourself like this--” 

“I can and I will!” Bakugou snapped at you, his glare darker than you had seen in a very long time. “I already let them all down… All because of what you told me! So back off, and let me do what I must!” 

Feeling an ache in your chest from the pained way he blamed all of this on you, you found yourself at a loss for words, only able to stare up at him in shock. He couldn’t be serious… Could he? Was he actually upset with you, or had he just become delusional from the pain and exhaustion? In fact, you couldn’t even remember what it was he was referring to. You knew that this battle was going to be one of their biggest losses, as this was such an important one it had even been on one of your tests in college. There hadn’t been a single detail that you didn’t share with him, from what you could remember. What was it that you had told him outside of the facts that made him so upset? 

“Katsuki… I--” 

“I’ll die standing here if it means that I can make up for even a little bit of the trouble I caused them. Now get off me… You stupid… woman--” A weak fluttering of his eyes as followed by another near collapse, which made you fear that you were going to be crushed under his weight. Instead, he was caught again, but this time by Midoriya. The happy and bright expression he usually sported was now furrowed with a mix of obvious anger and annoyance, 

“That’s enough, Kacchan. Kirishima can take over from here for you. We’re taking you to the infirmary.” 

“No-!” Bakugou tried to push Midoriya off him, but it was impossible, all his energy nearly drained. “Get off me, Deku, you moron! I don’t need your help--” As the belligerent blonde tried to take a step on his own, his leg gave out on him, nearly sending him to the ground again if not for the help of his companion. With a sigh, Midoriya shared an exasperated glance with you before he started towards the infirmary, no longer finding it necessary to try and stop Bakugou as he shuffled forward with the help of his crutch. 

Although you felt that, at this point, your company wasn’t something that Bakugou wanted, you followed behind them silently. With every step, gasp he made or groan of agony, you felt the weight of guilt only grow heavier on your shoulders. Yet, you still didn’t know why. What was it that you had said or didn’t say? The burning question was digging a hole right into your brain, and it didn’t stop, not even as you sat beside him while his wounds were tended to. You helped silently when it was requested of you, and you kept your gaze averted from his wounds because it was just too gruesome for you to look at. There was even a point that his pain was so severe that he clutched on tightly to your thigh, digging his fingers into your clothing and skin. It only made your heart ache further, and though what he had said to you hurt you deeply, your love for him overcame your sadness. So, you held his hand and comforted him, which is what you knew he needed right now. 

Eventually, he fell into unconsciousness, sleeping through the rest of the wound cleaning and wrapping process until he was tucked up under blankets. He had already been stricken with fever from the days of traveling with an open wound, and according to Ochaco, it was truly a miracle that he was even still alive. She was even worried that he could still die at any second, and though you tried to pretend to be worried as well, you had a hard time doing so. Not because you weren’t worried in general, but just because you knew that it wasn’t yet his time. But there was something else that you did know and that you wanted to tell him as soon as possible. 

This was the first sign of impending doom that you had been waiting on. The severity of the deaths and injuries, the set back of the army arriving home late, and one of the top generals out of commission told you that the huge fatal attack was going to come very soon. It rested on the tip of your tongue, burning your taste buds like you had just bitten into a sour fruit, and you wanted so badly to tell him. For days, you waited for him to regain full consciousness, the disgusting secret only growing more foul on your lips the longer you had to wait. Still, you suffered through it, taking care of him until the day he finally became alert. 

It was an early morning, with heavy rain and thunder crashing. You sat beside your husband, four days worth brooding over the truth and his words to you having set you in a nearly comatose state of waiting and watching. The book in your hands had gone unread, but you kept it open just so people would assume you were reading instead of your mind drifting off into oblivion. What first pulled your attention from the blurry words was a soft groan and a shifting of his arms. With one reaching out of the duvet that covered him to push the wet rag off his forehead, he rubbed his eyes, wincing from the pain that the nearby candlelight caused. 

Shutting your book, you scooted a bit closer to him, tenderly placing your hand on his chest. “Katsuki…?” 

“Where the hell am I…?” Bakugou mumbled, letting his hand fall to rest over yours. Still finding the dim light unbearable, he turned his head a bit to the side, resting his face into the soft fur of your cat. “Damn cat… You’re what’s been tickling my face.” With a sweet meow, your cat stayed in its place beside his head, purring loudly in reaction to his touch. Unable to resist a small smile of your own, you turned your hand to hold his fingers gently.

“It’s your own little furry personal nurse, Katsuki.” 

“Oh? Isn’t that what you are?” Although his voice was weak and the exhaustion was still apparent, he cracked a smirk with his tease, instantly making your face flush violently. 

“H-hey! I am not furry…” Pouting, you squeezed his fingers lightly in punishment, though all you received was another weak chortle from him. “You wake up after four days and the first thing you want to do is tease me.” 

“It’s because I love you, [F/N].” 

Your heart fluttered violently, feeling a rush of sudden emotion that you thought had been locked down tight. Even though you had tried to tell yourself over and over that you knew he wouldn’t die from this, the worry had been steadily growing that maybe he wouldn’t die, but would be comatose or completely bedridden for the rest of his days. But, now that he was finally awake, the relief exploded like a bomb, and you couldn’t stop the violent wave of tears and hiccups. 

“Oh Katsuki… I love you, too. I’m so glad that you’re awake.” Leaning forward, you rested your head against his chest, sobbing softly into the duvet. Pulling his free arm out from under it, he placed his hand on the back of your head, softly stroking your hair and rubbing your scalp with his fingers. The tender touch that should have calmed you only allowed more of the subdued emotions to break free, clutching on tightly to his hand, as if at any second he could vanish. 

After a moment of letting you cry it out, Bakugou gave a heavy sigh. “I… didn’t mean it.” 

Sniffling, you turned your head a bit to look up at his face. “What? Calling me furry? I’m not really upset about that, Katsuki--” 

“--No. No, not that. I mean… what I said by the stables.” 

Frown crossing your lips, you carefully sat up from him. “I… I still don’t really understand what you meant by that… I’ve tried to think about it… how I could have been the cause of what happened out there. But…-” 

“You weren’t. It was me. I had thought that, if I was strong enough… If I had enough courage and power, I could change what you said was going to happen. As if… I could change the future. But instead, all of this was because of me.” Bakugou rubbed his eyes, squeezing the inner corners against the bridge of his nose as he sighed. “I went against our strategies… Thinking that, if I could just… do something else last minute, it would have a positive outcome. But I was foolish… and I lost so many men. They trusted me… I let them all down.” 

The meaning behind this was more important than you would have ever really expected. Not only had he attempted to change the future, but his actions ended up the cause of what you had known. If he had truly stuck with the plans, they still would have failed, but would it have been as severe? 

Does that mean…. That if we try to change what we know will happen… Those actions just end up the cause of it. So, it’s already set in stone…

“Katsuki… That just means that everything I know about what happens, what is set in stone in my era, is happening right in front of us. That no matter what I say… what we do… nothing will change what is meant to happen.” You couldn’t control the breaking of your voice or the new burning of tears in your eyes as your mind came to terms with this simple truth. You couldn’t change the future, because all along, it already included you and all the actions you had taken. The deeply furrowed brow of your lover and his strong hand tightly gripped around yours made it clear that he understood this as well. 

There would be no saving anyone from the flames. There would be no long and happy life together, growing old and having a family. The fire would swallow everything, and that included the man that you adored with every inch of your soul. 

And yourself. 

#bnha imagines #bnha scenarios #bakugou x reader #bakugou #katsuki bakugou #bnha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #bnha fanfiction #fanfiction #bnha writing blog #xreader #personal #ancient soul

[mercury-filled-intp]

i made a wlw version of The Selection

For all of you touch starved gays out there, I came prepared!! If you are in teh market for:

a) wlw romances 

b) wlw romances 

c) wlw slightly cottagecore romances involving princesses and mild references to the l word

boy do i have the story for you. I’ve put it under the break so you can read here if you want. but it’s also on AO3 https://archiveofourown.org/works/23904733

so knock yourself out. this is what an intp does with too much spare time. i’m literally rewriting the whole book. so. yeah

Jen Carpenter was building an overly elaborate birdhouse in her basement woodshop when the telephone rang. Its high-pitched wobble echoed across the scuffed linoleum and wooden paneled staircase until her mother answered the line.

           “Carpenter and Son, how may I help you?” She said. Jen sang a showtune while she worked, cutting a hole into a thin plank of wood. She was in the middle of making a bright pink birdhouse for a Two’s spoiled daughter. Jen was instructed to bedazzle the front, but she figured she would take some creative liberty and make it look a little less disgusting, even though as a Five, she should have been answering to them. She was in the middle of nailing the cut and sanded pieces together when her mother came, practically rolling, down the stairs. “Jen, that was the royal court who just called…” Sandra said in an annoying voice. “They mentioned we have a daughter between the ages of seventeen and twenty in our household… you know what that means—” Jen cut her off quickly, knowing where the conversation was going.

           “I’m not going to audition for The Selection, Mom. Get over it. I’m perfectly happy with my work here!” Jen loved her woodshop, but there were other reasons why she didn’t want to test her luck with the Princess. One of them being her true love waiting for her every night in the treehouse in the woods, where she met up with Vivienne most nights. Vivienne was another Five, born to a family of well-respected maids. Their families were close enough that they knew each other growing up, and fell in love almost instantly. Since they were both thirteen, they’ve been sneaking up to the treehouse (built with care by Jen one year) to exchange snacks and gifts and hopes for the future when they will finally leave their parents for something new. They had to keep their relationship a secret, or else their parents would forbid them from seeing each other. They fantasized about going to New Asia, where Vivienne could finally meet her colonial ancestors—but they wouldn’t be able to follow through with their future plans if Jen was married away to Princess Shane! Vivienne wasn’t able to audition—her parents didn’t have enough money to pay the audition fee—but Sandra was determined to get her daughter into the competition. Jen was a beautiful singer, but wasn’t quite ready to share her talent with the world.

           “You know how much the money would help us, Jen. I can open the bakery I’ve always wanted, your father could expand the business with Joe, it could all be so amazing. Just audition for me. Please? You’re so talented…” Sandra cooed, already living vicariously through Jen even though she hadn’t even been Selected yet.

           She would decide what to do about it all later. Princess Shane was gorgeous. She wouldn’t hate being with her… realistically, every citizen under the age of thirty probably had a crush on the princess. But, she had already met her true love, and was not ready to give that up. And, either way, she wouldn’t even be selected anyway. Being able to carry a tune didn’t make her the most attractive in all of District 4. Jen sighed and resumed construction on the birdhouse, lost in a daydream thinking about tomorrow’s possibilities. Before she could get into the groove of her work, though, her sister Chloe came bounding down the staircase with stomps belonging to an ogre. Bright orange pigtails (violently contrasting the basic dark-brown hair of the rest of her family…) trailed behind her as she very nearly fell onto the basement floor.

           “Please audition, Jen! You and Shane would look so pretty together!” She practically screamed, looking at Sandra for approval. Jen couldn’t believe her mother had brought Chloe into this. Every ten-year-old in the People’s Republic was obsessed with Princess Shane, that was not fair. There were probably more Princess Shane figurines in circulation than dollar bills. Jen conceded, though, because she’d do anything to make her sister happy. Even if she happened to be the devil incarnate with that red hair.

           “Alright, I’ll think about it. Now move,” she guided them towards the staircase with her callused hands on their backs, “I won’t be able to finish this by Sunday with you hovering,” Jen said. Her mother and sister turned up the stairs, giddily discussing what dress to have Jen wear to the auditions. The People’s Republic had strict laws on what is wearable in public, so she didn’t have many options either way. Too much glitter is seen as a public nuisance, and short skirts are seen as too tempting for the guards that patrol the streets every day. If only they were still America, Jen thought to herself, recalling history lessons from her mother as a child. Two centuries before, after the Great Eurasian War, The United States was absorbed by China and turned into the People’s Republic. But, because there was a literal ocean between the two land masses, the United States had an easy time overthrowing Chairman Mao V6, Eurasian Emperor. Now, nearly 170 years later, Jen can now call herself a People’s Republican. All thanks to Marsia Washington, the woman who led the revolution against Eurasia. At least, that’s what she learned in history classes at school. Her dad didn’t seem to like the curriculum, but Jen assumed that was because he was taught differently fifty years before. Once Chloe and Sandra’s gossip faded away into distant squealing overhead, Jen was finally able to start lacquering the birdhouse, omitting those godawful rhinestones.

#

           By nightfall, dinner was already on the table. Not much construction work was requested in the winter, so the meal was meager: stale turkey leftover from Thanksgiving with rice, and toaster strudels for dessert. Jen’s stomach groaned at the table, as forks and knifes clashed together. Through a full mouth, her little brother Max talked about his day at the junkyard with their father. Chloe and Jen’s mother discussed the latest plans for the business, and Jen stared out the window into the city lights visible just across the pier. She lost herself in the dazzling billboards and buildings, before the television set knocked her back into reality.

           “Selection auditions are tomorrow! How exciting! Hello, girls!” The news was on, and the most obnoxious reporter was covering the night’s program from District 2. She dragged some unsuspecting teenagers from the streets into the limelight by the forearms, “Are any of you planning on trying your luck at Princess Shane’s hand?” Most girls out of the group said they would, gushing about how exciting it was to get a chance to be with the Princess. Sandra glanced towards Jen expectantly, gently nudging her with a pointy elbow. Promptly ignoring her mother, Jen turned back to face the table.

           “We found a lovely dress for you. It’s pink tulle, and Vivienne’s mother said she’ll tailor it so it’s not dragging behind you. It was my dress back in the day,” Sandra said, staring wistfully into nothing, reliving her glory days. Jen nodded along passively, eyes focused on finishing the last few bites of toaster strudel on her plate.

           “Don’t do too much, Mom. I don’t even know if I’ll get picked! Let alone if I’ll even audition…” Sandra and Chole both whined at the same time, Max chatting with their father, ignoring the Selection talk. Jen thought of Vivienne, seeing her mother work on the dress she would wear for Princess Shane. She couldn’t do that to Vivienne. “You know, I’m feeling really full,” Jen said, slyly brushing some turkey and rice from her plate into a bowl under the table. “May I excuse myself?”

           “Alright, but get to sleep early. You want to be fresh-faced for your audition!” Jen nodded quickly, and headed to her room. Her family had lived here her whole life, so nothing changed except a new bed and desk over the years. There was a dirty mirror in the corner, a permanently unmade bed by the window, and a tragically stained once-white carpet covering the floor. Shutting the door, she uncovered the food she was able to sneak away from the table. It was not a full meal, but would be enough to keep Vivienne going for a while. She shoved the leftovers in a bag and then that bag into a backpack, slinging the familiar, worn fabric over her toned shoulders. Vivienne was always looking out for her siblings, even if it meant skipping meals so they could eat. Bringing her extras was the least Jen could do, considering all the kind things Vivienne has done for her.

           She turned to the mirror, trying in vain to look semi-presentable. Her shoulder-length curly hair was limp and dry, and her face looked dull and sunken. She was wearing a dark grey tunic and maxi skirt—optimal for mobilization and constant airflow but reminiscent of a potato sack. After doing her best to smooth out the wrinkles with her hands, she hiked up her skirt and bounded out the window.

#the selection #gay rights #i need to get out of the house #wlw #wlw ff #kiera cass #ya lit #ya books #wlw ya #this isn't cottagecore but i'm acting like it is

[meadweos]

Hello! I’m Ellie, this is Dorcas and I hope you enjoy this trainwreck of a soft as all hell introduction to my babe. I’m super excited to be writing here okay byeeeeeeeee.

is that LILY JAMES wearing that HUFFLEPUFF scarf ? no, it appears to be DORCAS MEADOWES who happens to be a SEVENTH year and a MUGGLEBORN !! SHE is CISFEMALE, and i heard they’re COMPASSIONATE and BENEVOLENT but might also seem NAIVE and DAMAGED. they appear to be leaning towards the side of the ORDER, but this is a conversation we should be having somewhere else. ( ellie / nineteen / gmt / she/her )

TRIGGER WARNINGS : death, injury, hospital mention, dogs.

PART ONE. BASICS / MAGICAL FULL NAME & MEANINGS  : Dorcas ( GAZELLE ) Andromache ( MAN / BATTLE ) Meadowes ( LIVED IN OR NEAR A MEADOW. ) DATE OF BIRTH : November 16th. AGE : 17. ZODIAC SIGN : Scorpio. HEIGHT : 5 ft 7 in. EYE COLOR : Dark brown. LEFT OR RIGHT HANDED : Ambidextrous.  FAVORITE COLOR : Light blue / black. SCHOOL : Hogwarts. BLOOD STATUS : Muggleborn. WHAT ARE THEIR PARENTS JOBS? : Her mother was a stay-at-home tutor, and her father was a doctor. ( Her aunt is a therapist. Her uncle is a lawyer. ) DO THEY HAVE ANY MAGICAL BLOOD? : Not in her immediate family. Her fifth, twice removed, much, much older cousin is a wizard (of Emeric Switch fame! Imagine that!) HOW DID THEIR MAGIC FIRST MANIFEST ITSELF? : She wanted to talk to the dogs at the local pet store, and accidentally ‘phased’ through the door. She was found half an hour later just stroking a pitbull puppy which had latched itself onto her. YEAR : Seventh year. HOUSE : Hufflepuff. PATRONUS : Panda. ( THE PANDA IS A RESOURCEFUL ANIMAL, AND THOSE WITH IT AS A PATRONUS ARE THE SAME. THEY ARE GOOD AT USING WHATEVER IS AROUND THEM, AND INCREDIBLY CREATIVE AND BRIGHT. THEY ARE FRIENDLY AND WARM, AND MANY MAY GO TO THEM FOR ADVICE OR HELP, WHICH THE PANDA WILL WILLINGLY GIVE. THEY ARE A BIT OF A HEALER BY NATURE, ENJOYING COMPANY AROUND THEM AND USING IT TO ENHANCE THEMSELVES. THEY LOVE TO EXPLORE MANY AREAS OF KNOWLEDGE AND THE WORLD, TRYING TO BROADEN THEIR HORIZONS AND KEEP THEIR MINDS OPEN. ) BOGGART : Her father, sat in the same armchair he’d always loved. His head turned towards her as he tells her it was all her fault, and the room shrinks. UPDATED: Earlier, and for very good reason, I wrote a drabble centered around what her Boggart would be for a different roleplay. It’s different than what it is now, but I’m nevertheless extremely proud of it. You can read it here. AMORTENTIA : What is it about true love, dearest? What makes everyone go wild? Is it the prospect that someone, someone whole, and unflinching, is out there - waiting for you? Waiting for your embrace, your touch? Or is it just that they are tired - tired of making homes in people and receiving nothing back? You, though. You make homes in all manner of things. And, anyway, who decided homes can’t be humans? Who decided home is a stationary concept? That your heart can’t be held in the hands of many people, that it cannot be crushed and sewn back together in a matter of minutes? Who decided that love, that great big messy concept, has to be romantic? You are as messy in love as you are in life - that is to say, you build pieces of yourself from the people around you, from the pieces of themselves they give you. The skin beneath your ear? Composed of the whispers of secrets from your first boyfriend. Your nose? Your mother’s love. The inside of your wrist? The balm of Emmeline’s arms around your body, shielding you the only way she can.  No. It isn’t so impossible that love is greater than the romance. That love is so many more things. The Greeks of old always said there were many kinds of love. Eros. Agape. Philia. Storge. Ludos. Pragma. Philautia. It is these things that you, alone, recite in that dungeon. The cold seems to envelop you as you take in a breath, the tendrils of your senses magnifying. It can be overwhelming, you know, but you are not as surprised as you expect to be. Warmth, sinking between your fingertips, laps at your cheek, at your lips as you breathe out. It sticks to you, to your tongue. Like caramel and peanut butter, the batter of the cookies your aunt always makes, the s’mores that you made around the campfire just last week. Her hair, or is it her perfume (?) wafting in your direction - regardless, you stay rooted to your place. Daisies, growing wild, the way they had at home, in your back garden. The smell of old brick and something crumbling - that weird Dragonleather smell that stays in the air whenever Hagrid passes, the smell of bursting fireworks (that time that the Marauders hadn’t realized there was anyone still down the corridor) and butterbeer, warming. Your dogs breath, laughter bubbling up as you remark on the smell of toothpaste, on peppermint and mossy treebark.  You’re not surprised to smell all the things that make this place home - you’re not surprised to smell that it’s not made up of just one person - just one thing, fixable - but many. Moving parts that flare up and slide away into the background of your senses. WAND : Phoenix tail feather core. 9 inches. Black Walnut. PETS : Owl, named Athena. Also owns a pitbull, the light of her life, Agape ( LOVE AND AFFECTION ) or Aggie, for short. CHARACTER INSPIRATION : Cinderella, Sonya Rostova, Izzie Stevens, Craig Middlebrooks, Ann Perkins, Ella Lopez, Jess Day, Riley Matthews, Penelope Garcia, Kara Danvers, Capheus Onyango, and Jane Villanueva. ( CHARACTER TAG HERE. )

PART TWO. ARE YOU GOOD AT… DANCING? : I certainly try.  SINGING? : Yes! COOKING? : Somewhat. DUELING? : Never been better. STUDYING? : If my grades are anything to go by, yes. MAGIC? : Uh, I’d hope so.

PART THREE. HAVE YOU EVER… DRIVEN A CAR? : Yes. Not well, though. FALLEN IN LOVE? : … Yes. HAD SEX? : Yes. LAUGHED SO HARD YOU CRIED? : I don’t know anyone who enjoys their life who hasn’t. SMOKED? : ... No. DONE DRUGS? : Nope. BROKEN THE LAW? : Accidentally. KILLED SOMEONE? : No.

PART FOUR. LITTLE SECRETS BIGGEST FEAR : Losing everyone. And everything. SOMEONE YOU ADMIRE : Emme, McGonagall. SOMEONE YOU FEAR : I don’t really know. Dumbledore, when he’s mad. Whatever that ponce of a miserable Muggle hater is called. SOMEONE YOU MISS : Grandpa. Terry. My brother. Mum. Dad. SOMEONE YOU COULDN’T LIVE WITHOUT : Emme. Myself, too. SOMEONE YOU COULD KILL : Anyone who hates muggles. DO YOU WANT KIDS? : Maybe someday. DO YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED? : To the right person? Yeah. BIGGEST REGRET : Not sleeping in the same room as my brother that night. ( I could have saved him. I should have saved him. ) CAN YOU SEE THESTRALS? : Yes.

PART FIVE. FINISH THIS SENTENCE I AM… : Sleepy. Wishing Emmeline was here. I WISH… : Ice-cream could become a person. MAYBE ONE DAY… : I won’t feel this guilt anymore. SOMETIMES I… : Fall in love in the morning, and out of it by lunch. MY FAVOURITE SUBJECTS ARE… : Herbology. MY LEAST FAVOURITE SUBJECTS ARE… : History of Magic, Divination. IF I COULD DO IT AGAIN, I WOULD… : Save my brother. IF I COULD GO TO A DIFFERENT SCHOOL, I WOULD CHOOSE… : Beauxbatons, not Ilvermorny. IF I COULD CHOOSE A DEATHLY HALLOW, I WOULD CHOOSE… : The Stone. ( Say it like it isn’t a mantra, Dorcas. As though it isn’t something that’s poisoned your dreams since discovering those stories may be based in reality. )

PART SIX. MISCELLANEOUS

DESCRIBE THEIR AESTHETIC IN THREE WORDS : Sea, daisies, laughter. THEME SONG : Lavender’s Blue ( CINDERELLA SOUNDTRACK - 2015. ) / Sonya Alone ( BRITTAIN ASHFORD - NATASHA, PIERRE & THE GREAT COMET OF 1812 - ORIGINAL BROADWAY CAST RECORDING. ) / Times are Hard for Dreamers (Pop Version) ( PIPPA SOO - AMELIE - ORIGINAL BROADWAY CAST RECORDING. ) TOP FIVE SONGS IN THEIR ( MODERN ) PLAYLIST : You Are Enough - Sleeping at Last, Yellow - Coldplay, When I Kissed the Teacher - ABBA, Breathe - In The Heights, & Paradise - George Ezra. VINE THAT FITS THEM : ( x ) RANDOM HEADCANONS : 1. Dorcas loves deeply. Deeply, deeply, deeply. It’s intrinsic to who she is. She’s protective, maddeningly so, and unable to sit still. She wears her heart on her sleeve, and is a nightmare when it comes to pacing herself. She knows not of patience, or of taking time to breathe. She consists solely of love - a palace built between her ribs of the people that she loves. In this, she is a typical Taurus Hufflepuff. ( x ) 2. Dorcas lost her parents at a very young age. She doesn’t often speak of it - speak about them, about the parents that she lost and the brother that she was unable to save. They were killed in a home burglary turned murder spree when she was six. They’d been meant to go on holiday, but Dorcas had come down with the stomach flu, so they’d foregone the vacation when it spread to Dorcas’s younger sister, Calliope. The only reason that Dorcas survived was that she managed to climb beneath her bed with her younger sister Calliope facing the wall, only her back visible from the opening created by the duvet. She gets stabbed three times, one of those stab wounds narrowly avoiding piercing her spleen and the major abdominal arteries. She still has the scars on her lower back. Callie was uninjured, and she was the one who managed to get to the neighbors house (by climbing out of the window from the second floor and dropping at least eleven feet). Dorcas remembers, mostly, finding out her parents and brother were murdered. The rest of it often feels incredibly foggy. She went through therapy for a number of years before she was discharged from the North West Surrey Mental Health Trust. The nightmares, today, are infrequent, but some nights are worse than others. She often takes a calming draught before she goes to sleep - provided by Madame Pomfrey at the Hospital Wing.  3. Dorcas’s best friend in the universe is Emmeline Vance. They aren’t in the same house, but that doesn’t matter. They met at eleven, on the train to Hogwarts. Dorcas, with brown hair down to her hip, and Emmeline’s hair newly cut into a bob ( her parents had gone wild at her for that one, ) and that was it. The rest, as they say, is History. If you can’t find Dorcas, she’s usually with Emmeline. 60% of her spare time is spent wherever Emmeline is. They’re one another’s great loves. She doesn’t know what she’d be without Emme.  4. Dorcas wants to be a Herbologist or a Healer when she graduates. She’s not sure how likely that plan is to succeed with everything going on - how far she’ll get before she abandons it all to help the people that she wants to help, desperately. As it stands, 40% of her spare time is spent either in the Potions classroom or the Herbology classroom - Potions is a required course for becoming a Healer.  5. If this were a modern AU, Dorcas’d totally be a theater kid. She’d also be that kid that is always making scrapbooks - always half finishing projects, the one that has too many cacti and exotic plants in the corner of her room. She’d keep her phone on her, always, lockscreen always changing. She’d love bands like Little Mix and butcher the Spanish when she tried to sing songs like Despacito.  6. FUTURE: Dorcas manages to live through the Wizarding War ( well, mostly ) without casting the Killing Curse. She’s fast, she’s quick, and she doesn’t stand still. She’s often the one coming careening past the others, ducking beneath their outstretched arms as light - green, red, blue, yellow - is cast against the ground. She Apparates in and out, as though her being there is a mirage. People, injured, bystanders, disappear from where they’d been only seconds before, as soon as her hand secures around anywhere she can grip on. She works with trembling hands, to heal those that she can. Four separate times she manages to Apparate away from under Voldemort’s nose.  The first time is with her arm hooked under Fabian Prewett, his unconscious body bruised and the cut on his arm infected with what she suspects is a modified strain of the venom of the Venomous Tentacula. The second time is with a handful of wands - all belonging to fellow Order members. The third time is with Dedalus Diggle. He’s a handful, that time, splaying limbs, cracking as they twist around. They have a spell maker in their midst but Dorcas is the only one that can sooth the pain, to make it all more bearable while they try and fix it. The fourth time is with Emmeline. Emme’s far too headstrong for her own good, and knows how rare it is that Voldemort himself makes an appearance. Dorcas is the one that breaks Bellatrix’s focus - the Cruciatus curse trained on her best friend, on her Emmeline, flickers when Dorcas passes, a blur of black leather and hair tied up in a bun, bangs hanging low and the light long since dimmed in her eyes. When Emmeline comes to, the pain still ricochets through her bones, and Dorcas is powerless to help. It takes days for the aftershocks to fade. The faintest roar of rage is still heard in Dorcas’s brain. She’s just too slow, in the end, to save herself, although she doesn’t try. She’s not ready, but she is. She’s not happy, but she is. She knew there was only one way this could end. The one incapable of love striking down the one composed entirely of it is the only end that makes sense in a world at war - in a world in which war stories are not one of morals. War stories are made of absolute and uncompromising allegiance to obscenity and evil. It just takes her years to realize. Years to reconcile. Being soft does not make her immune to this. Being alive doesn’t. She is happy, but it is not a happy ending. No - it’s a very sad beginning.

#sac:intro #wc will be up somewhere soon #skdfnskjdf

[jamesashtonisbae]

The Freshman Series Ch. 3

Word Count: 4,233

Pairing: James x MC

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Language, mentions sex

Summary: Ch.3 of Book 1 of The Freshman by PB. ALSO THE MEET CUTE.

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters, they belong to pixelberry studios.  A lot of dialogue is from PB.  I will change the storyline a bit when things are out of character for people, particularly Lacey and James. 

Ch. 3

Lacey made her way back to the suite in a daze. She moved slowly, a bit dumbstruck. How was she going to fix this? She’d already taken all she could in loans from the FAFSA, she wouldn’t be able to work to get the kind of money to make up the difference, and she had taken as many scholarships as she could. Plus, there was no way there were any research positions open at this point, especially to a freshman.  In reality, she wouldn’t be able to stay. There was no way.  

 "Lacey?  Is everything okay?" Kaitlyn asked, as Lacey paced across the kitchen, wracking her brain for something to solve this. She almost didn’t notice that Kaitlyn had asked her something.

"I... I don't think so.  My family can’t afford to keep me going to school here.  What started off as the best week of my life just turned into a nightmare,” Lacey kept pacing as her roommates looked on sadly.  She was starting to wear a hole into the floor as her brain kept racing, struggling to find a solution for her to stay, coming up short except for when she was thinking about robbing a bank or selling some hot jewelry.

 "We can't lose you!  We've... we've bonded!" Zack exclaimed, grabbing her arms and pulling her into a hug.  He was being a little bit dramatic, but she was grateful he cared enough about her to take this dramatic stance.  She leaned into the hug for a moment, realizing she was not alone, which strengthened her.

 "I guess there's only one thing to do now... I have to find a way to stay.  I'm not going down without a fight!" Lacey said, putting on a determined face.  She was going to stay.  She looked across the room at Chris.  Her face flushed and she looked down at her shoes.  He looked across at her like she was the sun.  And even though she loved what had happened the night before, she had to focus to stay here.  He was a distraction from her staying here.  But damn if he wasn’t a cute distraction.  And then there was the English building guy… Oh! The Guy!  She had just run into him!  He had asked if she was okay!  She wasn’t! She should have talked to him.  No, she shook herself from that thought.  He was also a distraction from her staying here. She needed to focus.

 "Hell yeah!  That's the spirit!" Zack shouted, hugging her more tightly.  She now knew it wasn’t the alcohol that made him loud, he was just loud.

 "Maybe you could get... a job?" Tyler asked. At least someone was trying to help… maybe she could sell her eggs, or her body, or something.

 "No offense, but tuition runs like $50k a year here.  Minimum wage isn't gonna cover that,” Abbie pointed out what Lacey was already thinking.

 "There's gotta be some way you can stay... I mean, I'm here on a football scholarship,” Chris said, reaching over and holding her wrist.

 "I don't think I'm exactly what the football team is looking for,” Lacey leaned away a little, but Chris’s fingers still lingered.

 "Maybe not, but I'm sure there are other scholarships available.  And besides, I could vouch for the fact that you have great stamina," Chris added with a giggle.

 "Not a bad idea, Chris.  It might be worth a trip to the financial aid office to check it out!" Kaitlyn exclaimed, grabbing Lacey’s arm and pulling her down the hall to her room.  And clearly ignoring the last comment about her stamina.

 Lacey found herself putting on her keds and a pair of denim capris.  She pulled on a solid navy t-shirt just in time, because Kaitlyn grabbed her arm and pulled her out of the suite.  Suddenly, they were in the Admissions Building, right next to the English Building. They were seated outside of an office, which had the door open, and suddenly, an elegantly quirky woman with wavy red hair led out a sad looking young man.  He must have gotten some really bad news.  Lacey had a feeling that would be her in the next few minutes.

 "Thank you, next!" the woman, with Mrs. Twombly printed on her nametag, said cheerily, chuckling to herself as she did. “Oh, I am so funny,” she whispered, mostly to herself.  Lacey let out a silent giggle.  This woman was a character.

 "Hi there!  My friend just realized she's super poor and needs a scholarship!" Kaitlyn exclaimed, the second she and Lacey had sat down in the seats in Mrs. Twombly’s office.

 "Kaitlyn!" Lacey said, turning to her friend, agape. She knew that she thought she was helping, but Lacey needed professionalism right now, not enthusiasm.

 "What? It's true.  Besides, if we're trying to get this done fast, we've got to cut right to the chase,” Kaitlyn teased her.

 "Let's see here... any special skills?" Mrs. Twombly asked.

 "Actually... I was the valedictorian of my high school!" Lacey said, not knowing if that was a special skill or not.  It had landed her a partial scholarship the first time, but if they had any left, the academic ones would be the only ones she would be qualified for.

 "What?  How come you never told me you're a huge nerd?" Kaitlyn asked.  Lacey sighed, a little annoyed at Kaitlyn, but she couldn’t say anything about it right now.  All she could do was hope for some funds left.  

 "Just because I happen to get great grades doesn't mean I'm a nerd!" Lacey smiled, not feeling insulted.  She’d rather be a nerd than anything else.  She liked being studious and smart.

 "Whether you're a nerd or not, all of our academic scholarships have already been distributed,” Mrs. Twombly confirmed what she already knew.

 "There has to be something,” Lacey said, mostly to herself, rubbing her face with her hands.  She knew it, she was going to have to leave.  She would be okay, she would go to community college, or work, or work out and practice basketball and get an athletic scholarship.  She would go home, and be back in a year.  She could do it.  No, she had to do it.

 "Well... there is... one thing.  But I'm not quite sure you'd be up to it,” Mrs. Twombly said.

 "Thanks for the vote of confidence!" Lacey exclaimed.  She could do it.  She swore she could do it.

 "It's nothing personal.  It's just, well... we do have one research assistant position open.  It would pay for your tuition, plus room and board.  But... it's for Professor Vasquez,” Mrs. Twombly said those last two words like they were poison.

 "Professor Enrique Vaszuez?!  The famous author? The Names of All Lost Things is one of my favorite books ever!  Working for him would be amazing!" Kaitlyn exclaimed.

 "Spoken like someone who's never met the man...  Professor Vasquez has taken over a dozen assistants in the last five years.  None has lasted more than a week,” Twombly warned.

 "Until now..." Lacey said, determined to get this job and keep it.  She had no choice but to do it.  And if she was going to be in the English building, she would maybe see that cute guy a lot more.  Unless he’d only disappeared into that building because it was close and he needed to go to the restroom.  Although he was dressed a lot like an English student.  And if he was an English student, then they would have a lot to talk about, since the Journalism major was housed in the English school.  And then she would get to know him super well. And then they would date and get married and raise their perfect, beautiful children.

 "That's what they all say..." Mrs. Twombly warned, pulling her out of her trance thinking about the attractive man she hadn’t even met yet.

 "The thing about me is I'm desperate,” Lacey said, knowing that it wasn’t a good look, but it would be the only look she could find.

 "Is that supposed to be a good thing?" Mrs. Twombly asked, her perfectly trimmed eyebrows raised.

 "Well... yes?" Lacey said, grasping at straws.

 "If you say so...  Good luck.  You'll need it,” Mrs. Twombly handed Lacey an information packet on being a research assistant.  Lacey took it, then she and Kaitlyn turned to go to over to the second floor of the English building.

 "I think this is the place,” Kaitlyn said, standing in front of door 212.  She pushed it open a crack.

 "Time to make my first impression,” Lacey plastered on a smile and stepped into the office.

 "Hello?" a voice said.  Lacey turned to where it was coming from, and saw the English Building guy stacking books on the shelf behind the desk.  If he was who she was working for, it would be a very easy year. He was even more handsome in person, and his eyes made her melt where she was standing.  She smiled at him as he smiled at her, both recognizing each other from across the quad and earlier that morning when she had brushed him off distractedly.

 "You!  You're that guy I saw across the quad the first day!  I... er... wait... Are you single?" Lacey blurted out.  She instantly regretted it.  The first things she’d coherently said to this gorgeous man were “are you single?” Could she have been more obvious?  He didn’t need to know that she had a huge crush on him before they’d even had a conversation.  She was so awkward, but at least there would maybe be a funny story to tell their grandchildren one day.

 "Actually, I'm in a pretty committed relationship...” in that instant her heart sank, and in the next it soared, “with my work.  The play I'm writing is basically my life.”  She still didn’t know his name, but she sauntered behind the desk and placed her hand on it, leaning over with her hand on her hip.

 "So I guess that doesn't leave much room for a girl... friend?” Lacey asked, seductively biting her lip.  He glanced down at her lips, and licked his own.  She let loose a wide grin, knowing that seduction wasn’t necessarily the best tactic with him, for all she knew, he was Professor Vasquez and would fire her for flirting with him.  He seemed to be older than her, but she didn’t think he was old enough to have a PhD.

 "Well, even Shakespeare took a break from plays once in a while..." the guy said, looking her up and down, grinning down at her as she gazed up at him.  His demeanor had changed, he looked at her like he could devour her.  And she was more than willing to let him.

 “What kind of breaks are we talking about?” she moved a little closer.  Her heart was thundering in her chest, and she prayed he couldn’t hear it.

 “I’m a writer, I think I can come up with something to keep your interest piqued for a while…” his lips twitched up in the sexiest smile she had ever seen.

 "James!” a faceless voice from the room behind the desk interrupted their flirtations, “I've lost my latest pages again!  Get in here and help me find them!"

 "I'd better get on that.  Here's hoping you stick around.  I'll let the professor know you're here,” James said, winking at her.  His hand gripped her hip, ever so slightly, as he walked around her to enter the back room.

 As James left, he nudged his bag and a notebook fell out and onto the floor.  Kaitlyn surreptitiously snatched it up and read the cover.

 "Looks like someone dropped the script for his play!" Kaitlyn exclaimed.

 "Should we run after him?  I'm sure he'd want it back..." Lacey asked, wanting an excuse to run after him and keep talking to him.  She wanted to know more, she wanted to ask about his play.  About what inspired him.  About what had led to him writing in the first place.  How he liked to research.  Where the best writing places were on campus.  If he wanted to spend time showing her around campus.  He was doing what he wanted and what he was passionate about, and she thought that was incredible.  There was nothing she loved more than seeing people’s eyes light up about the things they loved.  And maybe that’s why she had such a strong desire to be a journalist.  So she could be a vessel for sharing those passions with the world.  But for now, all she wanted was to get to know James better.

 "Yeah, but if we did that, we'd never get to read it!" Kaitlyn interrupted her thoughts and eagerly flipped through the pages.

 "Blah blah, class disparity, blah blah, working conditions in Victorian London... oh here's something good!" Kaitlyn gasped, her eyes roaming over the pages hungrily.

 "Kaitlyn!  I'm not sure James would want you looking through that,” Lacey said, glancing around and wishing that James would come back so she could talk to him some more.  But also very interested in reading his play.

 "This is getting juicy.  Apparently James has a... creative imagination,” Kaitlyn said, raising her eyebrows. Lacey glanced over at her reading the play, and she had to admit, his earlier comment about keeping her interest piqued, well, had her piqued.

 "What are you talking about?" Lacey asked, grasping at the book, trying to look in it and see what Kaitlyn was referring to.

 "I'm not sure I should show you... it might warp your innocent mind,” Kaitlyn winked.  If only she knew about Chris between her legs the night before.  She would maybe not be so quick to assume Lacey was innocent.

 "Kaitlyn!" Lacey grabbed at it, wondering what James would do to her, what his imagination have him do to her.  She was turned on just thinking about him.

 "This is hot stuff.  Tell you what.  One time offer... You and I can do a little line reading?  What do you say?" Kaitlyn asked.

 "Come on.... let's read that scene,” Lacey wanted to know what he had written.  She had a feeling he was brilliant.  And hot, very very hot.

 "Let's see... Rosethorne Park.  Act IV.”

 "Looks like you'll be Lady Elizabeth Darling, and I'll be William, the stable boy turned soldier, back from the war,” Kaitlyn directed

 "Hey!  Why do you get to be the cool, brooding heartthrob?" Lacey asked, fake offended.

 "I think that's obvious.  Now, let's get started.”

 Lady Elizabeth Darling wakes up to find her bedroom bathed in moonlight.  Then, as she watches, a shadow appears at the open window.

 "Your line, Lacey,” Kaitlyn gestured towards her to keep going.

 "Be warned, intruder!  I keep a knife beneath my pillow,” Elizabeth said.

 "Careful, then.  I'd hate to die before tasting your lips once more,” William said to her, dropping his voice.

 The figure enters the room.  It's William.

 "You... you know you can't be here,” Elizabeth whispered.

 William pulls off his shirt and tosses it to the floor, his eyes on the knife in Elizabeth's hand.

 "If you mean to stab me, do me the courtesy of giving me a quick death.  I can't live without you anyway."

 Elizabeth lowers the dagger from his chest to his trousers... then cuts through his belt in a single stroke!

 "Oh wow.  I can't believe James wrote this.  He seems so... straight-laced,” Lacey began tugging at her collar.  It was hot. He was giving her bedroom eyes earlier.  He surely knew his way around a woman.  She wanted to find out.

 "Sometimes people will surprise you..." Kaitlyn smirked at her, knowing what she was thinking, surely.

 Elizabeth reaches forward and gently strokes William's cheek.

 "Uh, are we following stage directions too, or just reading aloud?" Lacey asked, concerned.

 "I leave that up to you."

 "Let's just stick to the reading, okay?" Lacey decided.

 "Of course."

 "My lady, I am entirely at your mercy.  Do with me what you will."

 "I suppose I can find a use for you... you can start by helping me out of this corset."

 Elizabeth turns her back to William, tucking her long, plaited hair over her shoulder.  He kneels behind her, his fingers going to the laces of her corset...

 "Not like that... with your mouth."

 "Oh, wow, I did not expect that,” Lacey said, suddenly getting very warm, imagining James on his knees behind her, and his mouth on her back.

 "Seriously... is it getting hot in here or what?"

 "A-hem.  I hope I'm not interrupting anything,” James had entered.  He glanced over at Lacey, who was holding his notebook in her hands.  She thrust it onto the table in front of her, eyes wide. She was still in shock from what she had read.  And he had written.  She almost couldn’t look him in the eyes.  But then she realized that she needed to look at him.  Because he was biting his lip as he noticed what part she was reading.

 "We were just..." Lacey said, her hand still on the notebook

 "Enjoying my play?  Or at least, I hope you were enjoying it,” James asked, sincerely looking like he wanted some feedback. Lacey could kind of tell he was insecure about his writing, and had maybe not yet heard a lot of feedback on it. She was about to provide feedback, but then doubted herself, because why would he want feedback from a freshman who was probably not even going to manage to stay at this university?  But, she didn’t really care.  She wanted to spend time with him and if that meant pretending she knew anything about a play, then she was going to do it.

 "Actually... want to join in the reading?" Lacey asked coyly, smiling up at him.

 "It seems like the two of you have it pretty well covered,” James leaned down so he was a hair away from her.  If she moved a muscle, she would be in his arms.  Which is where she desperately wanted to be.

 "The more the merrier,” Lacey whispered softly.

 "It's okay.  I've always preferred two-person scenes.  But I'm glad the two of you were able to appreciate my work.  It seemed like you really inhabited those roles,” James grinned down at her, running his eyes up and down her body.  She could only imagine what he was thinking about.

 "Oh yeah.  I hate to do anything halfway,” Kaitlyn interrupted.

 Just then, Lacey heard footsteps approaching.

 "Who is making all of this racket out here?!" a grumpy, cross, disheveled man asked in a grumpy, cross, disheveled man voice.

 "Sounds like my cue to leave!  Good luck, Lacey!" Kaitlyn smiled, running out of the room.

 The grumpy, cross, disheveled man stormed into the room, glancing around until his gaze landed on Lacey.

 "You!  Are you the one disturbing my peace?" he asked.

 "We... we were practically whispering,” Lacey said softly, intimidated.  Then she remembered she had to be here in order to stay at school, and she pushed her shoulders forward and decided to stay strong.

 "Professor, allow me to introduce your new assistant, Lacey Morgan,” James said, gesturing towards her, after he jumped away from her once Vasquez walked in.

 "Assistant.  What a joke.  Have you ever assisted anyone before, Lacey?" Professor Vasquez asked.

 "I mean... not professionally.  But I like to think of myself as helpful.  And I was the point guard on my basketball team.  So assists were partially my job..." Lacey joked, knowing that she couldn’t even keep the jokes out of her conversation.

 "My last assistant thought she was being helpful.  Right up until the moment she 'helpfully' lost a flash drive containing three months' worth of work!  And then there was the assistant before her.  He thought it would be helpful to hum while he dusted my office.  That cacophonous melody in my head for weeks!  I couldn't write a word on my new novel!  And then there was the last guy.  He had a distracting sense of fashion!  So many stripes!" he was shouting now.

 "Well... I'll just, not, do those things then?" Lacey suggested.

 "It was terrible.  Do you think Faulkner had to deal with such distractions? His family afforded him the peace and quiet of their barn!" Vasquez continued yelling.  Lacey almost laughed.  He was ridiculous.

 "I'm sure the ag campus has a barn they'd lend you..." Lacey continued joking.  James laughed softly in the corner.  Their eyes met, and they both sent each other smirks.  They had a connection already.  She could feel it.

 "He got quiet solitude.  All I get are assistants,” Vasquez gestured towards her.

 "I understand... but I won't be like your other assistants,” Lacey said firmly.

 "And why exactly is that?" the professor asked, sticking out his chin.

 "Well, I won't lose flash drives, or any other important items for that matter.  And humming drives me insane, so I would never subject you to that.  Or singing aloud, or foot tapping, or pen tapping.  Really any kind of tapping.  And don't get me started on stripes.  So last season.  And I'm willing to do anything,” Lacey added.

 "I already assumed that was a prerequisite.  Extremely disappointing.  Get out!" the professor shouted. Lacey was scared, but she didn’t let it show.

 She glared at him, right in his eyes, and said, "No."

 "No?"

 "I won't get out.  I'm going to stay.  And I'm going to prove to you that I can be every bit the capable research assistant.  I'll make your life easier.  Not more difficult.  And I can't walk away from this.  I know in my heart that this is where I need to be."

 "Listen to you.  So defiant.  Stubborn.  You're a caricature of your entire generation!"

 As he said the words, Professor Vasquez stopped for a moment... and then... "Which actually makes you the person I'm looking for after all." 

 "What?"

 "I'll explain later.  For now, I'll accept you as my assistant on a trial basis.  Starting immediately.  In fact, I have a pressing matter that I need you to take care of tonight.  Let's call it your first test..."

 "Anything!  I'm on it!"

 Vasquez walked over to his bookshelf and pulled out a massive, dusty old novel.  

 "This is my second novel, A Winter in July.  It needs to be digitized by tomorrow morning."

 "No problem!  I'll scan it right away!"

 "Actually... no.  I need it formatted as a text document.  You'll have to describe it by hand."

 "Oh. Okay.  It's only, what, a thousand pages?  Cool.  Can do,” Lacey couldn’t do it.  She had no idea how she was going to get it finished, and then she was going to have to leave this university, and spend time at home, at the community college, working at the small diner, doing things she did not want to do at all.

 "Yes.  You'd better get to work."

 Lacey looked up at James who frowned sympathetically, and as Vasquez left to teach a class, he grabbed her arm and squeezed, “you’ll do great.”

 She smiled up at him gratefully, knowing she was doing this for him, and because she knew that he was worth staying for now, and then walked out and hustled home.

 "There's our roomie!" Zack exclaimed.

 "I heard from Kaitlyn that you got a research job!" Tyler said, “Congrats!”

 "Let's celebrate!  The rooftop garden is calling my name!" Kaitlyn exclaimed, already sipping on a glass of wine.

 "Guys... there's nothing to celebrate.  Vasquez is insane.  He wants me to transcribe his thousand page novel... tonight.  Even if I work all night, I'll only be able to pound out a couple hundred pages max,” Lacey said, dropping her head in her hands as she slumped on the table.

 "Typing at a hundred words per minute for eight hours, assuming 250 words per page... you'd generate 192 pages,” Tyler calculated.

 "Wow.  Did you just do that math in your head?" Abbie asked, impressed.

 "Uh... is that weird?" Tyler asked, concerned.

 "No way!  Smart is sexy!" Lacey smiled, nodding at Abbie.

 "Really?” Tyler asked, again.

 "Totally,” Abbie said, looking over at him and smiling.

 "Wow, uh... thanks!" Tyler smiled back at her.

 Abbie smiled shyly at Tyler as Lacey winked at Kaitlyn and Zack.

 "So... back to the matter at hand.  What do you think Tyler?" Lacey asked.

 "According to my calculations, one person alone can write 192 pages in 8 hours... But if all six of us do this together... we'll have more than enough time to write the full book!" Tyler exclaimed.

 "Go team!  Let's do this thing!" Chris added, having been pretty absent from the conversation for a while now.

 "You... you'd really stay up all night helping me with this stupid project?" Lacey asked, shocked.  They’d known each other for a day.  She didn’t deserve these people at all.  They were truly the best roommates a girl could ask for.

 "It does mean I'll have to miss several fabulous frat parties tonight... but I'm in,” Kaitlyn said.

 "Eh.  I didn't have plans anyway,” Abbie shrugged.

 "You belong here, Lacey.  With us,” Chris said softly.  His eyes added with me.

 "I'll start a pot of coffee.  It's gonna be a long night!" Zack exclaimed, grabbing the pot.

 "Let's write some pages!" Kaitlyn led the charge. Lacey was grateful someone was taking the charge.

#choices #james x mc #james ashton #james x lacey #choices tf #choices tf/ts #choices fanfiction

[brokendelusion-blog1]

Fearless Vampire Killers Aftermath

It's been more than two years already since the last show oft Fearless Vampire Killers took place and I can't help still being bitter about what happened.

So before you continue reading, I want you to know that this is my personal point of view, my very subjective way of seeing things and I have no intention of being nice just so I won’t hurt anybody (ironically that's pretty much the contrary of how I usually am and sth that I criticize about others).   I'm aware that lots of people defend Kier for his decision but I'm not one of them and since I don't want people to start harassing me, I even made a new tumblr blog just so I could get all these things that I have been carrying with me since the news about the band's break up off my chest.

In other words: I know that I will piss some of you off and I don't give a damn (again ironically that way of thinking is basically what I hold against Kier).

To make something clear from the beginning: No I don't know the guys or their families or their friends apart from seeing them on concerts and maybe some talking to them for five minutes or so. I don't pretend to know what they think or what they feel and yet I dare to speak up. And for fu**'s sake, I don't hate Kier, I'm far away from that. But I do for sure question his behavior and decisions.

One thing that hit me a few days after I read the sad news was that retrospectively lots of things make more sense to me now and sadly it makes it worse for me. Thinking back I realize one could have noticed a change but then again I guess most fans from any band are kind of blind to such signs. I don't exclude myself. Despite being older than most of the Fearless Vampire Killers fans (no offense here, being young does not equal stupid, I know that) I had this ideal picture in my head how the guys are, how they behave and how they treat each other. I waited to be disillusioned, because there always comes a day when reality hits you but to be honest, I never thought it would be Kier who'd smash my delusions.

I thought a lot about how it happened and something that bothers me more than anything else is that it was not just a shock for the fans but for the other band members as well. Something must have gone horribly wrong in their whole friendship but as mentioned before, I don't know them, I can't say what it was.

But I know for sure that deciding to leave a band is nothing you do overnight, especially when it's one like Fearless Vampire Kilelrs and leaving without further warning, just like Kier did, is nothing I can approve of. If I remember correctly Kier himself wrote that he was struggling for months and that he simply knew that there was no way back for him (I don't find the original posting anymore, if anyone has a screenshot they could provide me, I'd be thankful).

I don't know about you but I for one think that there would have been other ways/solutions. I don't expect anyone to do something they won't be happy with but it's not as if Kier would have chosen to try anything else anyway. He decided to quit and he didn't talk it through with his closest friends. And to all those telling me that there were no other possibilities I like to point out that several bands exist whose singers have side projects and are doing very well with this. In my opinion it would have been worth a shot. He also could have paused to make a new start with another project, to see if that's what he really wants now and to make a final decision later.

But in the very first place I think he should have talked to the band before all of that. What a shitty move it was to tour through Europe, raising the hopes of both the fans and the rest of the band just to quit a short while after that. I attended two concerts during the Bruises Headliner Tour and of course I seized my chance to chat for a few minutes with the band members and it was fun. Retrospectively I realize that what I thought was Kier probably having a bad day and therefore being absent minded was probably more what he said himself in his statement after the break up: He didn't have anything considerable to say regarding the band.

I'd love to tell you something else but I can't without giving myself away or the friends who told me that very something in private. It freaks me out a bit because it makes SO MUCH SENSE to me now (and to every friend of mine whom I told this story) and it would make my point of view clearer to you.

It made me think about how long Kier must have kept his feelings bottled up. I'm fairly sure he hurt himself with this as much as he hurt the other guys and yet I blame him for that. Why? Well because it was his own decision while the others were presented with a fait accompli with no chance of having a say in it, with no back up plan, with no chance of offering a solution everyone might have been comfortable with.

I want you to recall your friendship with your closest friend/s. Are they trustworthy in your eyes? Do you love them? Have you known them for a long time? Would you willingly hurt them? Are they someone you can tell anything? Do you claim to know them and to know their way of dealing with problems? Do they have metal health issues? Do they fear change or at least have a personal problem with it? Would you surprise/confront them without any warning with what will be the biggest change of their life in that moment? If your answer to the last question is 'no' I guess you already understand what I want to say. If your answer is 'yes' I guess I get why you still sympathize a lot with Kier. Nevertheless I hope you still see what I'm getting at with those questions.

In case you're still reading, you probably noticed already that this is something personal and not only based on a 'fan lost their favourite band'-story. I can't pretend my view on this whole drama is not influenced by personal experiences that were something similar. I had a friend who crushed our plans for the future with one sentence. This friendship never recovered and even after some years I can't help but feeling betrayed and that I was left with broken dreams, lots of self-doubts and the feeling of being totally worthless and meaningless while she moved on to live her life. The reason I still feel terrible thinking of her is easy to explain: When someone you considered one of the best people in your life and who claimed to feel the same about you, was willing to leave you behind like that and all of a sudden, without a warning, without a second thought about you, your health, your feelings, your entire future... what would other people to whom you don't matter that much be like? Do I have to mention that whatever trust issue you might have will be made worse?

Can you people imagine how terrible it must have been to show up to a regular band meeting, after your first Europe Headliner Tour and getting told that your friend leaves you behind? You're probably all hyped up, full of inspiration and hopes and then all is smashed into pieces.

There was no warning, no talking beforehand, no preparations for when he leaves... Or should I say... no preparations for the others since Kier seemed to have done his own planning? He came up pretty fast with a new name and a fellow musician. Didn't he? Well yeah, he probably set all up before he resigned from Fearless Vampire Killers and left the others with a mess and the need to start all over again.

I might have a strange interpretation of friendship but friends should talk about what's up in their lives and what bothers them, shouldn't they? Of course it's always a single person's decision to make, most of all when it's a decision concerning their own life. You can't live an unhappy life just so someone else gets to be happy, I get that. But the way you decide and the way you communicate your thoughts and feelings are crucial.

Besides, no one claims that it's easy to tell friends that your mutual plans for the future don't suit you anymore or that something in your life doesn't match anymore with them but wouldn't it simply be the fairer way of dealing with it to tell them in advance/the moment you realize it's not just a phase?

I myself seek advice from most of my friends and I do it especially when a decision will affect other people that are important to me. At least I try to talk to them, I try to make sure they understand my reasons and I try to include them in the process of making a decision. It takes courage to do so, I admit that but don't they deserve that? They are the most important people in my life and if I can't trust them to understand and to support me even if they might lose something in this process... then they are not my friends and our relationship was doomed from the beginning. But if I'm not even willing to try it the hard way, I don't deserve them.

Obviously nothing of that happened between Kier and the others and I really wonder why for they were best friends, the men who would walk through hell together...

I remember the farewell show and what happened after it very well. I remember how drunk Laurence was, barely able to walk alone and how Kier took another exit in the evening. It was as if I saw a bad movie where they show different 'What would happen if' scenes in one of the character's imagination. Except that it was real and so sad I had to bite my tongue to not burst into tears.

I got to know Kier (as far as one can say that) as an open and thoughtful person with a healthy view of life and personal relationships and I always had the illusion that we would get along quite well if we would happen to spend some time together. Now, after all that happened, I doubt that I would enjoy his company for long.

So basically, what I want to say is: It's okay that Kier decided to leave the band if it was a decision he needed to make for his own life to improve in his eyes. But the way he did it was the way of a coward and that really makes it hard for me to accept it.

Some other thoughts that are not directly linked to the breakup but still keep me up one night or another:

A few months after the breakup Kier posted this Valentine's Day picture on Instagram and talked about how his girlfriend makes him a better man. I was confused and – although it had nothing to do with me or the fans or any other person outside their relationship – mad. What was that all of a sudden? Why hadn't he talked about her earlier?

And what's the talking about being a better man because of her? Well, a 'better man' would have given his friends a chance to get adjusted to the thought of changing their plans for the future. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to attack his girlfriend, I don't know her at all but the way he talked in this post made me really angry because everything before seemed utterly fake to me then.

I don't expect people to make a fuss about their sexuality, lifestyle or relationships but if you're part of something like Fearless Vampire Killers, a band that means (or meant) so much for (young) people, you should be careful with what you do, say, and show. And so far this band was a real life queer baiting experience deluxe (and I blame not only Kier on this matter for the whole band had their part in this) that added so much fuel to the fire of fan assumptions that it almost hurts to think of it. I didn't even notice it at first, a friend pointed it out to me after I talked with her how I felt about the 'Hey folks, surprise I'm not gay and I have had a girlfriend for 5 years now' posting.

I don't care if people are gay, bi, pan, trans, nonbinary, genderfluid and who knows how many labels we have. That's cool, I'm one of them (and that's one reason why I sympathized so much with this band) but the way Kier wrote and talked during the time of Fearless Vampire Killers was so different from now and although I should know it better it feels like a betrayal. It feels like a big 'F**k you, I kept silence about it and played my part because you all thought I was gay and that suited my band very much!' (And don't come at me with options like 'bi' or 'pan' or whatever. I know that's possible but it's not the point.)

Furthermore I wonder how much his girlfriend knew about his plans. I can only guess but it'd surprise me if she didn't know about it before all the others and I'm not talking about a few days but weeks and/or months.

There were many comments on Twitter and Instagram by fans on this topic and while I don't condone the way they attacked her and how wedding pictures of their friends were publicly analyzed, I can't argue the points that were made. And since she chose to speak up by herself I can't just keep this out of here, either. I remember her defending herself (which – no matter how I think about her and her relationship to Kier – shouldn't have been necessary in the first place) and that she argued that all the people should stop blaming Kier for keeping their relationship out of his internet presence (well unfortunately those people proved him and her right to do so anyway) and that they also should stop  speaking up for Laurence and how they all could be sitting together on the couch now having fun but without a picture/proof nobody would believe her that there was no bad blood between the guys and how they are still friends and... Did anyone of you believe this? Like... really? I know people tend to defend those they love, I'm no better, but that bullshit was almost an offense. Especially now after all the time and after everyone could clearly see the effects of the breakup, her attempt to justify herself/Kier/anything in that matter appears kind of ridiculous.

Now it took me really long to write these lines, a few months to be a bit more precise. Thinking about Fearless Vampire Killers still hurts although I frequently listen to and enjoy the music. I thought about letting this text rot on my hard drive but then Michael left Inklings and after that I saw some tweets of Kier regarding his mental health that rubbed me the wrong way and the latest tweets of Laurence were the final push to continue writing this rant... (‘Latest’ translates into ‘we’re still some months past those events again…’ because I’m slow as f**k.)

So yeah, this isn't finished yet because here are another two cents of mine:

I personally dislike the sound of Inklings. It's average pop music that doesn't sound special to me. Deep Down' was the best so far but it's nothing I would like to listen to more often. In my absolutely subjective personal view the music is boring and some parts are too electronic and literally hurt my ears. I miss Kier's voice but not enough to endure this run-of-the-mill sound.

When the news hit that Michael left Inklings my first thought was: “Karma, Baby!”

When Kier wrote the first time that he recently discovered that he suffers from mental health issues I tried to be sympathetic but I couldn't because it felt too much like a payback from a higher force. Yes that's mean and I actually feel sorry for him now because I don't wish him anything bad, really, but you can't deny that it's a one of its kind coincidence.

Seeing Drew, Luke and Laurence working on new music makes me happy and full of hope but the joy is marred by the fact that Shane is no part of The Broken Kings. I have no idea what happened there and I can only make wild assumptions on how he maybe wanted something more stable and went back to his graphic designer life. (Oh, did anyone else think he was responsible for the Inklings designs?)

Reading Laurences tweets about Fearless Vampire Killers support my opinion that he hasn't forgiven Kier and is still deeply hurt. And you know what? He has every right in this world to still be bitter. I understand him and no matter how much I still like Kier for several reasons, I don't think I'll forgive him how he left the band. Not 'that' but 'how'.

And now go and hate me. I don't mind.

#Fearless Vampire Killers #Kier Kemp #Laurence Beveridge #Drew Woolnough #Luke Illingworth #Shane Sumner #Inklings #Inklings band #FVK

[geneticmisfit]

Gather ‘round, gather ‘round, children

It’s time to talk about Peter’s evolving views on Tony

This will be rambly, but still I will break this down by focusing on Peter’s Head Space in each movie he appears in

aka this will be broken into three ( and a half. ish. ) parts: Iron Man 2 / Civil War / Homecoming, with a side dish of Infinity War.

It will also be a two-in-one as I will talk about Peter’s Homecoming arc as a character.

This is going to be a LONG post

Okay so, to understand Peter’s attitude towards Tony in CW and Homecoming, we need to set the clock back a few movies back. More specifically, this moment:

IRON MAN 2:

While at the time the movie came out, this was a simple gag moment, a fun beat to break the intense flow of an action sequence. However, during Homecoming press junket, Tom revealed in an interview that he got word from Feige that they were retconning ( retroactive continuity = adding something extra / a new layer to a piece of content years after the fact ) that moment to have that kid be Peter as a 9-10 year old kid. Now, this is an EXTREMELY interesting piece of content if you look at Peter’s reactions to Tony in both Civil War and Homecoming.

The thing you need to understand is, Peter is a nerd. ( shocking, I know ). Like, he is a deep comic book and science nerd and you bet your ass he was extremely excited about the fact that Iron Man existed because, [cue 9 year old mindset]  he was a PURE FORM OF SCIENCE. This rich dude built a suit ! An actual technological suit ! That can do amazing things ! Think of the possibilities in robotics ! And he was a bona-fide real life superhero ?! How dope was THAT ?! 

Best way to summarize Peter’s attitude towards Tony is that Tony was Justin Bieber and Peter had the Bieber Fever. 

And then, six months, he is at the Expo. And suddenly there is chaos. And suddenly one of those Robots he read in all those comic books is advancing towards him. Naturally, as an easily-impressioned nine year old, he thinks: What would Iron Man Do ?! So, he raises his arm, like he had seen Iron Man do in all those videos, and then...

He shows up. Actual Iron Man. In the flesh. And they had taken down a bad guy ! Together ! And he told him he had done a good job ! Imagine that ! You bet he cherishes that moment and keeps it with him and everything he does for the next few years. Maybe one day he will meet him again ! And show his IDOL ( because he is full on idolizing him at this point, don’t forget ) what he can do with his chemistry and robotics skills ! ( Keep in mind, Peter was already interested in these things before IM 2, but this just galvanized that hunger for knowledge even more )

However, one thing you need to keep in mind, people CHANGE. While you can still idolize someone, THAT OVERWHELMING FEELING WILL GET REPLACED AS YOU GET OLDER AND YOUR ATTENTION SHIFTS TO OTHER THINGS. 

aka, Peter’s Vague Notion of Being A Hero meets reality in Peter’s Uncle Ben moment.

and by that I mean his literal Uncle Ben moment.

IN-BETWEEN THE MOVIES:

Because, what is a fourteen year old suddenly getting actual superpowers supposed to think ? Of course he is going to liken himself to his idol Iron Man and think joining this super cool wrestling thing will mean his one quick ticket to fame and stardom because Iron Man did it so easily, right ? 

Also, yes, I am sticking with the wrestling origin for my MCU Peter, because I adore the wrestling origin. 

But then-- Things don’t work out like that. A child meets the cold truths of reality. He lets the bad guy go away out of simple spite and a general feeling of uncaringness, and it results in the death of the man he loved the most, a man who was his FATHER in everything but name. 

Peter learns that night that he will never look the other way if he can help it. 

( which is why I think Peter’s Civil War quote of When you do the things that I can, but you don’t, and then the bad things happen-- They happen because of you is SUCH a wonderful and organic take on the Great Power line. )

Which then brings us to...

CIVIL WAR:

So, at this point, Tony is more or less the LAST thing on Peter’s mind. He is busy dealing with grief ( considering it’s only four to five months after Ben’s death at this point, it’s still Fresh ), and his newfound sense of duty and responsibility, he has no time to dwell on Iron Man.

Until Tony literally shows up inside his living room.

At that point, all the old feelings surface, [cue 9 year old mindset] Oh my god ! That’s Tony Stark ! And he is here? For me ? He wants my help ? He wants me to go to Germany ?! Well, of course, of course I’m going to go to Germany with him, that means I can finally show him what I can do with my powers ! And make him proud ! Because he is my Idol and I really care about what he thinks ! 

Two things about this: 

First of all, this is extremely childish behavior from Peter. And you can TELL it is because in THIS Civil War scene, you can see both sides of Peter that will be more evident in Homecoming. First you have SPIDEY!PETER, who vehemently denies being Spider Man when confronted until Tony literally dangles the suit in front of him, is defensive about his costume and casually proud about his web fluid, but then he is also extremely serious about not telling May and later on during his speech about his responsibilities for doing what he is doing. This is the Peter we see for majority of the bedroom sequence. However in this sequence, we can see bits of the Fanboy Peter peek out a little, his excited look at seeing Tony, that posture of Pride when Tony calls him by his Superhero Name. It’s that nine year old child living his DREAM. And we see MORE of that side of Peter in the airport sequence, with his repeated mentions of wanting to impress Mister Stark, and the heavy insinuations that Tony dragged him along to Germany but told him ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ABOUT THE ACCORDS. 

There is also the case of Tony lowkey highkey convincing Peter to go to Germany with him by threatening to spill his secret to May. Put a pin on all of this, it will be touched upon towards the end. 

AND THEN WE GET TO HOMECOMING AND PETER’S GROWTH AS A PERSON AND HIS SELF-ACCEPTANCE

Peter’s views of Tony changes completely in this movie, along with Peter’s views of himself. Peter’s character arc in this movie is ACCEPTING SPIDER MAN IS A PART OF PETER RATHER THAN A SEPARATE ENTITY. For the first half of the movie, Peter is ready to shed his civilian persona. He is leaving school clubs, he is distancing himself from everyone, constantly sneaking out to be Spider-Man because, in a case of Guess Whose Nine Year Old Self Came Back, Peter is desperately trying to impress his idol once again. And, in addition to that, it is simply more FUN ( initially ) to be Spider-Man. He is known ! He is famous ! He can do incredible things he can’t do as Peter Parker ! Peter Parker who is constantly ridiculed at school and is borderline invisible beyond the decathlon club.  Why would he go back to being Peter Parker when he can be Spider-Man full time ? Especially when Iron Man, THE Iron Man, told him they could call him after Germany ! He must have impressed him, right ?! 

Wrong.

Peter lets his priorities shift from Doing It in Ben’s memory, to doing it to Impress Tony. And the result is the ferry incident. Peter is full on relieving his worst memories, he let the power to go his head, he let himself be cocky like that night in the Wrestling Ring, as a result he let innocents get hurt and nearly WORSE. 

Tell me that isn’t the look of a kid who is relieving the worst night of his life in his head.

And then Tony shows up, tells him how much of a FAILURE he was, and tells him practically everything he was already telling HIMSELF. ‘’ What if someone had died tonight ? That’s on YOU.’’ as if he doesn’t already know what that’s like.

But then, he also says something key, that based on the tip Peter gave Tony, Tony called the FBI but didn’t tell Peter. And then told him he was in the wrong for not knowing what he was not told in the first place.

And then, it clicks in his head, All this time I’ve been trying so hard to impress Mister Stark but-- he didn’t think of me enough to LET ME KNOW what I’ve been going after for the past several weeks. I was so caught up in impressing him that I forgot why I do it for.

This is part one of two of his self-realization of the connection between being Peter and being Spider Man, and the de-idolization of Tony in Peter’s eyes.

Part two comes after the reveal that Toomes is Liz’s dad.

After the Stark Suit is gone, Peter is back to basics. He is back at school, being a kid, he feels like he has lost the right to be Spider-Man. He nearly became the Burglar to the ferry’s Uncle Ben. ( it’s a shitty metaphor but you get what I mean ). And he does something Peter Parker never managed to do before-- He asks Liz Allan out. 

Even he is surprised by this.

That’s his first keying into the fact that being Spider-Man, having that courage and bravado, has spilled into the life of Peter Parker as something for the better. He now had the balls he previously lacked to ask his crush out.

However, the key moment comes at THIS point.

He has just discovered that That Vulture Guy is Liz’s dad, and he just threatened him with a gun, and told him he could just walk away from all of it, if he just lets himself be Peter for the night.

He could be Peter Parker. He could be the one to dance with Liz Allan all night in that prom, in front of everyone, be the Cool Kid he dreamed of being.

But that would mean letting Toomes go, and succeed with his heist.

And that’s not something he can do, not after he failed Ben’s memory with the Ferry incident.

When you do the things that I can, but you DON’T, and then the bad things happen, they happen because of you.

But the full REALIZATION of his duality comes when he is all alone.

He is, for all intents and purposes, left to die. There is no one to help him. He cries out for help, to anyone, EVERYONE, to Tony, the Idol he wanted to impress so badly-- Yet he is not there. No one is there. And when he looks down, he doesn’t see Spider-Man, the Cool Hero of Queens who is becoming a Friendly Neighborhood in his own right.

It is an on the nose visual, one that harkens back to the comics, but it is also an important visual reminder for Peter. Because, behind the mask of the Great Hero, is the face of a frightened kid. But he is not just a frightened kid-- Because he is also Spider-Man ! The only way he discovered who Vulture was, was because of Peter Parker ! He was going after Toomes because of Peter Parker ! Peter Parker who was becoming more recognized by his friends, who now had the courage to speak out and talk to his crushes like Liz, and rivals like Flash ! Peter Parker who-- Who enjoyed of being. He didn’t have to sacrifice for the other, he could have both sides of him feed off of each other and become better !

And, when he finally moves to lift the pillar with the sheer force of his will, the first name he calls out, the first THOUGHT that galvanizes him, is PETER PARKER.

Come on Peter, come on Spider-Man.

Peter is the one that gives Spider-Man his strength. Not Tony, not Iron Man, himself.

Peter Parker manages to take down Vulture, Peter Parker manages to save the day. Not Spider-Man, not Iron Man, not any of the Avengers. Him.

And then-- He is invited to Upstate. He is going to Avengers Facility, the Nine Year old in him bursts out once again, there is excitement, had Tony finally recognized him ?!

He meets Tony, and Tony-- takes credit. He spins his genuine then-anger at Peter post Ferry, and Peter’s SELF-GROWTH, into something that he managed to do for Peter. Peter’s expression in this is telling.

‘’--jesus fucking christ this guy.’’

But then-- Tony offers Peter The Dream. Here is an Iron-Man like Spider Suit. Here it is your Official Invitation to the Avengers. It’s your dream kid, your nine year old self would have jumped at it without a second thought, what say you ? 

What says he is-- He is no longer that nine year old kid. He is a kid who learned his lessons the hard way. Who lost people for his mistakes. Who had to grab himself by the shoulders and raise himself to be the Hero He Wanted to Be. ( I’m saying he is alone when it comes to the Spidey thing, May is always there for him emotionally as Peter, before anyone @ ‘s me for erasing May or anything of the sort, that’s not the focus here )

And, he comes to realise-- Tony Stark is kind of an asshole. Now, BIG point her, WE THE AUDIENCE KNOW TONY’S CHARACTER INSIDE AND OUT BUT PETER DOES NOT. FROM PETER’S POINT OF VIEW, TONY HAS:

- Shown up in his life out of nowhere, with the knowledge of Peter’s Greatest Secret, then used it as a leverage to get him to go to Germany with him. ( Well Germany is dangerous better tell your hot aunt... Tony MAY have been joking then, but Peter does not know Tony well enough to know the difference. ) - Told him the reason Cap and others broke off was because Cap felt like he was right about something, but was actually in the wrong. And Peter just trusted Tony’s words without a second thought because why would The Iron Man lie to him ?? He Is Never Told Of The Accords by Tony. - Acted like he disregarded his tip on the Vulture, then revealed he called the FBI on it, but didn’t let Peter know like he didn’t think Peter might be interested in that info, and then YELLED at him for NOT KNOWING the said fact.  -With the benefit of hindsight, Peter agrees with the costume being taken away from him then, however for him to achieve that self emotional and personal growth, and then to see Tony act like he was taking all the credit for him is-- Annoying, to say the least. -AND KEEP IN MIND, When Peter refuses the Avengers invitation, he does not expect the Stark Suit to be returned to him. He is perfectly content to continue what he’s doing with his old pajamas. Because he is CONTENT. He has seen how Tony behaves, the in-fighting of the Avengers, how nobody was there when Vulture was clearly stealing from the government and was creating dangerous weapons and selling it on the streets. He has seen that, and he wants no part of that. ( I also guarantee he knows about the Accords at that point. So there is that after-the-fact realization of points 1 and 2 ) 

So, after ALL THAT, Peter’s current view on Tony is:

Mister Stark, I respect you, and I love everything you have done as an inventor and as Iron Man-- but I don’t want to BE you. From MY POINT OF VIEW, you’ve done nothing but lie and manipulate and take credit for things that I have done personally. To a degree, I GET it-- But I don’t want to BE it. 

It is also that destruction of hero worship that allows Peter to be himself come Infinity War. You can see that he no longer has that Hesitation around Tony, he is assertive ( coming up with the Aliens plan on the spot like no sweat ), he is relaxed, and he is comfortable enough to drag Tony and blame him for getting on the ship ( a little taste of his own medicine, if you will ), but still respect him, and be apologetic for not doing Good Enough during Titan fight. But it is not an apology in the sense of ‘I AM SORRY FOR FAILING YOU MISTER STARK I’M SORRY I DIDN’T IMPRESS YOU’, it is more of an apology for ‘I’m sorry because I failed and that’s on me’ 

TL : DR

- He views Ben Parker as his FATHER.  AND MAY AS HIS MOTHER. - He no longer hero worships Tony but respects him as a regular flawed person - He would sell Tony Stark for One Corn chip.  - He no longer gives a fuck about what Tony thinks of him because HE is the one being SPIDER MAN, not Tony. His mistakes are his own. And only persons to hold him accountable for that are HIMSELF and MAY. His FAMILY. 

And that concludes my TED Talk.

#this is legitimately over 2000 words #this is the length of an average fic #god fucking DAMN #; I'm making it up as I go along ( headcanon ) #anyways if you want to know my pete's views on Tony. this is it. #; meta tag

[amirdawar]

STREET PARTY [3 of 4]:

So, this is a better description of the aftermath of the bombing. It’s told from the point of view of Amir’s sister, Faiza. Basically just giving myself painful feels. Enjoy. Or don’t read at all. Probably the second one.

Date: August 3rd, 2018. Warnings: This one’s a little rougher. Goes into more detail about the bombing, so be wary if brief mentions of blood/gore upset you. 

They’d heard the explosion, even in Knightsbridge.

Until that point, news coverage had been sketchy at best, but rolling, nonetheless, to feed the attention of the panicked masses. When things like this happened in London, people assumed the worst. They had been conditioned to. And as Faiza scrolled through her contact list, desperately searching for someone at the street party—anyone who might answer their bloody phone—she realised that she was absolutely one of them.

Amir was there. So was her mother.

Neither was answering her calls.

When the BBC Anchor apologised for their feed dropping out eerily soon after the rattling of her living room windows, she knew that ‘the worst’ had just become a reality.

A shaky voice on the television confirmed it was an explosion a few minutes later.

Pranav already had his shoes and jacket on before she’d finished her statement.

“If it’s a bomb, they’re going to need and appreciate all the medical help they can get,” he’d hurried, grabbing his keys and his mobile phone in a mad dash to do the right bloody thing. “You wait here, all right? Just in case they come back. Wait here.”

The idiot should’ve known his wife better.

When they’d arrived at the scene, hand in shaky hand, she could hardly believe her eyes.

Everyone was in utter disarray.

For the first time since the news had broken, there was no more frantically dialling her mother, or Amir, or Revati. All she could manage was shock and disgust. A heart in her throat and hand gripping her husband’s so tightly out of fear and fear alone that he’d be lucky to perform surgery with it ever again.

Faiza was no expert, but what she saw in the far distance didn’t look small enough to be a suicide vest, or some lucky pop by radicalised amateurs. It looked professional. Like a plane had dropped a fucking bomb right in the middle of her city and everything was burning. At the sight of the mangled wreckage of several police cars and what appeared to be an ambulance, she realised that whatever had exploded, had done so right where people had gathered to help.

They were cowards. They always were.

Police in the city had always been praised and renowned for their ability to deal with even the worst case scenarios, and yet, somehow, this seemed to be pushing them to their absolute limits. Maybe because when they’d found their footing initially, someone had planted a fucking bomb right underneath them. How many of those who’d shown up to help—to do a job—had died because of it? As she and Pranav slipped through the crowd and closer to the police cordon, she tried her hardest not to think about it at all.

It appeared that her husband had been right about them being desperate for help. They’d tried to protest their presence, claiming it was too dangerous for anyone to be near the scene, but after a quick flash of his Cromwell credentials, and a word exchanged with a police officer he was apparently friendly with, they were waived through a presence that seemed to be growing closer to the size of an army as each minute ticked on.

Faiza looked at the back of his head as they weaved through the crowd.

All she could smell was smoke—thick with rubber, plastic, people. If she hadn’t been terrified to wear her headscarf at a time like this, she might’ve covered her mouth with it should she be able to find her breath again. They were far enough away from the actual explosion that the fires were under control, but bits of building were scattered across the street; bricks smashed through the windshields of cars, and settled on their dashboards. There was glass everywhere. Shoes.

It was like a scene out of a movie she never wanted to see.

Faiza had thought she was too in shock to cry, but as they passed a woman who was being tended to by paramedics, the sight of her missing limbs was enough to break through to the part of her brain she was trying to save from the trauma.

It was unbelievable.

How could someone do this?

What if the reason her family wouldn’t answer was that they were burnt to a pile of ashes? Because they were crushed beneath the rubble of the buildings they’d been stood in? What if they were gone? What if they’d been stabbed, and couldn’t get away from the bomb even if they’d tried? What if she never got to see them again?

What if she had to explain to her father that his wife and son were dead?

“They would have called if they were okay,” she choked out.

Pranav didn’t hear her. The pained cries were too loud.

Loud enough that she’d remember them forever and a day.

When the surgeon saw someone in need of assistance, he gave his wife’s hand a reassuring squeeze before darting to help the semi-conscious figure just across the road.

What if there was more to come? What if this wasn’t over?

Faiza played with her hands nervously.

In spite of her mind trying to asphyxiate her from within, and even though she trembled so much it seemed impossible, she felt the vibrating of her phone before the screen had lit up with the face of her brother. Amir was calling. The sob that left her was so fucking strangled she was almost embarrassed answering. He was okay, despite her best attempts to convince herself otherwise. Thank God. Thank. God.

“Amir,” she cried down the phone, words so fast they were falling over each other in utter fucking relief. “Amir, please tell me you’re okay. Is mum with you? Did you all get out okay, or are you still in Belgravia? Prav and I just got here because he—”

The voice that interrupted her did not belong to her brother.

“Faiza, it’s Zahira.”

She froze.

Zahira wouldn’t call her instead of Amir. Not sounding like that.

“Faiza, where are you? I’m with your mother.”

A mother she could hear weeping. The assumptions drawn from her brother being unable to call himself aside, that sound alone was enough to make her blood run cold. Combined, it sucked out any of the hope she’d foolishly built up in a second.

“I think—I don’t—” Faiza stuttered, pressing a hand to her forehead, suddenly incredibly nauseous. She was scared to look around. “Just— Outside Baker & Spice, I think.”

“Can you make it up to Eaton Square?”

It was closer to the bomb site.

“Yes. Yes, just hold on. Put my mother on the phone.”

It’d been a wasted request. Nothing remotely coherent had come out of the woman’s mouth in the time it took to make her way up the street—Prav promising to follow as soon as he was done tending to the patient in his care—and it only served to upset her further. Her mother was a thousand times the woman she would ever be; if even Fatima couldn’t cope, what hope would she have? Faiza ran as fast as her legs and the surrounding debris would allow.

The sight that awaited her would surely haunt her until her own deathbed.

Fatima and Zahira were cut and bleeding, but they seemed—physically, at least—okay.

Then her eyes found her brother.

At first, Faiza thought he was looking right at her, and stupidly, as her heart braced for hope once more, she’d almost attempted a reassuring smile. He was awake, at least. That had to be something, right? Maybe it hadn’t been as bad as she was expecting?

Maybe she was wrong.

Slowly, the pieces of reality began to fall into place as though hope was nothing but a cruel illusion. Why would her mother be crying if he was conscious and in good hands? Why wasn’t he saying anything? Attempting to mumble out a stupid fucking joke? Faiza could see that the paramedics were in the middle of CPR, and as her eyes fell, that he was sprawled in a pool of what she could only assume to be his own blood.

When she glanced back at his face, it was like seeing a ghost.

Amir wasn’t looking at her. Amir wasn’t looking at anything.

As his head limply bounced with each compression, she realised:

He was gone.

Faiza opened her mouth, but nothing came out.

Even if she’d wanted to call out to her mother she was sure that Fatima wouldn’t have heard it.

“It’s been twenty-five minutes. Still no pulse,” she heard one of the off-duty paramedics who had rushed to help sigh out to his friend. “I think he’s done.”

What?

What?

“No. No, no. No!”

Even if she’d wanted to rationalise their decision, she couldn’t. There might have been others in dire need of assistance—perhaps, ones that had a better chance at survival than her brother did—but was that any reason to just stop? To leave him?

“No.” Fatima shook her head in denial so painful, Faiza was sure she was going to vomit if she had to endure another word. Another pained expression from a woman who, if she’d ever hurt, had never shown it to either of her children. It was fucking guttural. It didn’t even sound like her mother anymore. “That is my son.” At first, it was all anger. As she stabbed a finger in the direction of the paramedic, Faiza could see the fire in her eyes. Wished with every piece of her aching heart that it would help. “That is my son.” Then it was defeat. A deafening silence that could never be unheard. “My boy.”

“Mum…”

“You don’t stop until an ambulance has taken him to the hospital, and a doctor tells you to stop.”

The paramedic looked genuinely sympathetic. He also looked like he’d had this conversation before.

“I’m sorry. He’s lost too much blood. Even if we keep going until—”

“That is my son and you do not stop!”

“Ammi, please.” Faiza took a step forward, reaching out for her. The tears were falling, even if she couldn’t feel it. A quick glance at Zahira, crouched down beside the lifeless body of her brother, said that she was doing very much the same. “Look at him.” Saying the words felt like she was swallowing glass. “He’s gone.”

“No!” Fatima snatched her hand away, rounding on the men as they got to their feet. “Why is it taking so long? Where are they? Where is your ambulance?”

“They’re diverting every available vehicle and paramedic possible. We’re doing the best we can with the resources we have. This is an absolutely unprecedented situation.”

“That’s not good enough.”

“What’s happening?”

As if the sound of Pranav’s arrival was the trigger, the two simple words proved enough to push Fatima over the edge, and into a fresh flood tears. The Indian realised what was happening and rushed to her son’s side. The old woman’s legs finally gave out, and she fell to the ground, sobbing so loudly that surely Allah couldn’t ignore them. Ignore her suffering without mercy.

Faiza couldn’t tell which hurt more: seeing her mother’s pain, or feeling her own.

She watched as her husband took the place of the paramedics, and started his own set of compressions. It felt like her heart was breaking all over again.

It was just giving her mother hope.

It was just dragging out the pain.

As she slumped down against the car parked just behind her, she slipped into her own quiet sobs.

What were they supposed to do now?

Who was going to tell her father?

Who was going to tell Ashraf?

Who was going to tell Revati?

#self para #self para: street party #lol bye

[fortress-of-iserlohn]

Please tell me more about Reuenthal/Yang, I have never considered this ship before (Reinhard/Yang is my usual poison of choice) but now I can't stop thinking about it. I need AUs! And canon-divergence! And - please just tell me as many ways this could happen as you can, in as much detail as possible!

howdy anon friend i am fajsdofjsaf. honoured that you are considering my tiny lil raft ship and just HELLO

but really. you have certainly come to the right place! i am here to fulfil all of your AU and canon-divergence needs :D

beneath this cut you shall find TRASH wonder and MORE TRASH all your dreams come to life

alright let’s start with canon-divergence because this one is slightly less quantity and quality because canon fic is really hard??? (and also i am admittedly writing one right now and i don’t wanna give away too much :3????)

logh has all these cool plot points where the outcome changes depending on the action the character in question takes!!!!

ie. what if yang took schonkopf with him to meet with reinhardt the second time?

or like. what if yang disobeyed the orders from hq to stop the battle of vermillion?

or, my personal favourite, what if yang decided that schonkopf was right and then basically declared iserlohn an independent entity and the thirteenth fleet + iserlohn basically divorced themselves from the fpa???? 

seriously though. do you think either faction could’ve taken the fortress back by force? reinhardt probably eventually could, but in his best interests, he leaves yang alone and goes to crush the fpa first, then comes back to negotiate a truce.

but anyway, we’re here to talk about my favourite thing in the world - reuenthal/yang, so i’ll leave my crying about what if canon for later.

CANON DIVERGENCE REUENTHAL/YANG.

i don’t have much on this because i’ve yet to finish the source material but i will have. more. one. day. (i hope)

also pls note that i’m not big on plot beyond trashy fluff, so this is probably stupendously ooc and i can’t fix it just let me have my otp pls asofmsaodfijas

1. the star crossed lovers thing - where reuenthal accompanied kircheis to negotiate the exchange of prisoners with the fpa. and it’s literally love at first sight for him with yang and yang’s not. disagreeable because reuenthal is beautiful and he can be charming af when he wants to be (and he really wants to charm yang lbr) 

after kircheis and reuenthal return to odin, reuenthal starts moping about the admiral’s big brother house and eventually caves and talks to mittermeyer about his pure hearted admiration of yang where in mittermeyer stares flatly at reuenthal and tells him ‘you’re pining like one of those heroines you detest from the classics’ and reuenthal is so Offended TM by this he sulks off to the officer’s bar and drowns his sorrows until he becomes drunk enough to admit that hey, mittermeyer really knows him too well.

so the next day, very hung over, reuenthal starts sending letters (or more likely, electronic communications) to the 13th fleet with flowery poetry and declarations of his feelings and shit. and at the start, the 13th fleet kind of think he’s up to something nefarious. but then they just realise reuenthal actually really is just pathetically in love with yang and so for the good of all mankind, they just ‘accidentally delete’ every single message before it makes it to yang. 

no one expects that reuenthal eventually (cos that boy has no chill, like me) literally rolls up and parks his goddamned flagship next to the hyperion when the tristan is supposed to be passing nearby one day and demands to know why yang hasn’t been basically texting him back and then yang is like ‘??????????????? wat’ and then everyone in the 13th fleet, from schonkopf down to julian have a LOT OF EXPLAINING to do. (cazerne pretended to know nothing and washed his hands of the whole thing from the start because the less he knows about these sort of things the more sane he can stay okay).

eventually reinhardt gets sick of reuenthal moping about odin and shoos him off to be the consul of heinessen and reuenthal just continues to woo yang (now in person!!!) by showing off whenever he can even when it’s stupidly inappropriate with the inbuilt optimism of being a good looking and popular dude that everything will work out eventually and one day yang will just cave and say ‘fine.’ (spoiler alert, he does)

2. post-vermillion - actually this is 90% what my fic is about so i’m not going to say a lot about it. you’ll get to read this eventually as a proper-ish fic in a month or two (pray for me pls, it’s currently 7000 words and nowhere near done).

but consider. if yang and reuenthal met after the alliance surrendered. hm. Hm. HMMMMMMMMM. with added shenanigans from my favourite admirals from the empire and fpa sides :D

AU REUENTHAL/YANG

I FRIGGEN LOVE AU.

i’ve already talked about my ‘what if yang was born in the empire’ au, and briefly covered my college/university au where reuenthal social media stalks yang in a non-creepy way until he grows enough balls to just ask him out.

but, i was also yelling a lot at @beingevil today cos she brought up an actor au, but she’ll be writing that one so i’ll leave it up to her (WINK WONK)

other AUs to be considered:

1. history professor!yang & hitman!reuenthal - someone (probably fucking job trunicht) puts a hit out on yang and reuenthal is assigned to the job and he stakes out yang for a few days and yang is just like a small defenseless animal????? how can he murder a small, defenseless animal like that?? and gosh he’s super cute too??? he’s so my type!!!!!??? so he can’t pull the trigger and instead reuenthal goes on the run with yang and they uncover conspiracies against the government and then they put trunicht into prison and live happily ever after?

2. coffee shop au - where yang owns a coffee shop and reuenthal is a lawyer/business person who comes in to buy coffee, but in reality is here to perv on yang and also everyone in the shop (customers and staff alike) knows this except for yang who thinks reuenthal is a really nice guy and ‘julian, don’t you think reuenthal is just so friendly. he seems to really like leaning close to you when he talks and his voice is so deep and his eyes are so striking and he’s really handsome ???’ and julian sighs and goes to make himself another three expresso shots just to get through the rest of the hour

3. hogwarts au - where reuenthal is a slytherin, who’s bffls with a gryffindor (mittermeyer) and yang is the laziest ravenclaw ever sorted and did you know his best subject is a history of magic which everyone else hates??? so like they have potions together (because they’re the same age and so they would be in the same year level!!) and reuenthal thought that yang would be HELPFUL but there’s a reason yang consistently almost fails everything but history which is that he literally comes into class and then curls into a ball and then GOES TO SLEEP. so imagine reuenthal’s DESPAIR when he gets paired up with yang for astronomy as well? it’s his shittiest subject because ew astronomy??? and they’re assigned to do their major project together. but it doesn’t turn out as bad as he imagines. instead, they slowly develop ~feelings~ because there’s cute midnight dates on the astronomy tower where they cuddle beneath a blanket together for ~warmth~ and share hot tea while they do their star charts. then eventually reuenthal talks yang into going to a quidditch match and vaguely cheering for slytherin because reuenthal is one of their star players. cue attenborogh being thoroughly distressed by yang’s casual betrayal of his own house ‘but yang, you’ve never come to a single game in five years’ and yang replying ‘interhouse rivalry promotes antagonistic tendencies’ and wrapping himself up snugly with reuenthal’s green and white scarf.

honourable mentions go out to the following:

- hetalia!AU - where yang is the personification of the alliance and reuenthal falls in love with freedom

- soulmate!AU - where your soulmate’s name is written in their hand somewhere on your body & reuenthal’s been hiding his entire life because his name is written in alliance standard and yang just thinks that the curved lines across his arm is a really weird birthmark

- pokemon!AU - where yang is the most wtf gym leader ever and kind of just naps all day on a snorlax but no one’s been able to get a badge off him since he took the gym. reuenthal as an ambitious trainer who’s just missing THE ONE BADGE...

i actually have a heap more but i just. NEED TO CRY ABOUT THEM FOR A WHILE BECAUSE CANON IS MEAN TO ME

#ask me #anonymous #anon-friend you are best #reuyang #Anonymous

[tomeandflickcorner]

OUAT Episode Analysis- Leaving Storybrooke

Well, folks, here it is.  We’ve come to the final episode of Once Upon a Time. In spite of everything, regardless of which characters and ships you liked or disliked, regardless of which plotlines or seasons you might have felt were bad, I think we can all agree that this was an experience.  One that has probably changed us forever.

The final episode ends where the last one left off.  Robyn and Alice have traveled to Storybrooke to try and gather up some reinforcements to help Henry and company in Wish World.  And the first people they run into are the Dwarfs, Granny and Archie. Of course, there’s the slight issue that, as far as the people in Storybrooke are concerned, Henry has only just graduated High School, which means Alice and Robyn have to explain that they’re from the future and have traveled back in time via Gothel’s curse. However, their explanation results in the Dwarfs and Granny acting with hostility, with Granny even aiming her crossbow at the two young women, forcing them to run for their lives.  To be honest, this part really bothered me.  While I can appreciate how the people of Storybrooke have had a long history of a new Big Bad popping up every other week and all, Alice and Robyn were clearly trying to ask for their help.  And it wasn’t as if villains were the only people coming into Storybrooke.  Remember that when Ariel first appeared in town, she was there asking for help.  And Elsa also was not a threat when she arrived, either.  So their less-than-gracious welcome was rather uncalled for.  While I get that the notion that Alice and Robyn had come from the future when Henry was an adult with a wife and daughter might have been a big pill to swallow, it wasn’t that unheard off.  I’m sure everyone in town has heard of Emma and Killian Prime’s time traveling adventure by now.  So what was their deal with trying to attack Alice and Robyn?

Fortunately, after they’ve escaped the angry mob, Robyn spots Past!Regina’s car driving by. Speculating that Regina would believe their story if they told her Henry was in trouble, they approach the car. Only to find that the car was being borrowed by Past!Zelena, who was in the process of driving a much younger Robyn to daycare.  Past!Zelena explains that Regina was out of town, as she and Emma had taken Henry on a post-graduation trip.  (So, Henry didn’t immediately leave on his soul-searching quest after he graduated?) Not deterred by this, Robyn proceeds to try and convince Past!Zelena that she’s an older version of the five-year-old sitting in the car, using her knowledge of her mother’s quirks to back up her claim.  This seems to convince Past!Zelena, as she digs out the old magic bean she had stored away for a rainy day.

Incidentally, isn’t brining Past!Zelena into this going to create a significant timeline issue down the road? Because this means the Zelena we’ve seen throughout the season already knew that all of this was going to happen. Unless she drinks a forgetting potion like the way Past!Rumpelstiltskin did during the CS movie.

Back in the Wish World, Henry Prime, Rumpelstiltskin Prime and Wish Killian have found themselves within the Snowglobe prison, where Henry Prime is reunited with Parallel Ella and Lucy.  As the three try to figure out how to stay warm, Rumpelstiltskin Prime admits that when Wish Henry used the Author’s pen to strip Alice of her mantle of Guardian, it somehow ended up taking away Rumpelstiltskin Prime’s powers as well.  Not sure how that worked, but at this point, there’s no point in questioning it. Either way, it means that Rumpelstiltskin Prime is just as susceptible to the cold as the rest of them, and has no way of freeing them from their snowy prison.  Wish Killian, however, refuses to give up and insists on continuing to try and find a way to break out of the Snow Globe by testing different areas of the glass siding periodically for weak points.

It’s here that Wish Killian and Rumpelstiltskin Prime have a moment of some sort.  Rumpelstiltskin Prime basically admits he’s always secretly admired his former advisory’s unwavering determination and good heart, stating that that’s why he kept Wish Killian as his partner in the Hyperion Heights police force even after waking up.  He even states that he feels that Wish Killian was the closest thing he ever had to a friend.  Which is kinda nice, if not for the fact that he tried to kill Killian Prime and the people he cared about on more than one occasion. Then again, maybe the only reason why this scene is even believable is because this isn’t Killian Prime.  It’s rather convenient that they can use that detail to brush over everything that went down between S4-6.

At that moment, out of nowhere, Maui’s fishhook appears in front of them.  When Wish Killian uses it to free them all from the Snowglobe, it’s revealed that Alice and Robyn were responsible for its appearance.  Not sure how they managed to locate Maui’s fishhook, because I seem to remember Gothel confiscated that particular item.  So how were they able to find where she stashed the thing?  It’s also shown that Past!Zelena ended up tagging along when they portal jumped to Wish World.   However, there’s no time to celebrate their escape, as Robyn, Alice and Past!Zelena had found a notice posted on a tree outside, announcing that Wish Henry plans to execute Regina at dawn.

Meanwhile, Regina was being confronted by Wish Henry, who makes it very clear that he intends to make sure she pays for murdering Wish Snowing.  Regina tries to explain that it was all a mistake and that she didn’t mean to kill them, which is rather stupid.  What, she just accidentally crushed their hearts?  Even if she hadn’t figured out at the time that Wish Snowing were real people (which was extremely moronic to begin with), she still knew exactly what she was doing. Just saying, Regina.  Instead of trying to make excuses, maybe you should try and own up to what you did and apologize to Wish Henry.

Regardless, Regina goes on to try and beseech Wish Henry to look inside himself and find the brave and kind person she knows him to be.  She even states that, in another version of reality, she is Henry’s adoptive mother. And because of that, she doesn’t want to see anything happen to Wish Henry.  As one would expect, Wish Henry isn’t swayed by Regina’s words and announces that she will die in the morning for what she’s done.

Later on, Regina is, I guess, having some sort of dream sequence where she’s visited by the spirit of Robin. In the dream, Spirit Robin gives Regina a bit of a pep talk, stating that perhaps she can find a way to convince Wish Henry that no one’s path is set and that he can let go of his desire for vengeance.  The topic then turns to the sorrow that their lives together was so short.  Now for the record, I was overall okay with Outlaw Queen. At least when Robin wasn’t being reduced to Regina’s glorified arm candy.  But this scene seemed to come out of nowhere.  I might have forgotten, but I don’t think Regina mentioned Robin once during this whole season.  Not even when she was starting to get into that whole quasi-relationship with Facilier.  Not that Regina seemed all that upset upon learning that Facilier died, of course. (How did those two even meet again? They never explained.) Personally, I think it would have made more sense for Robin’s spirit to come to Robyn.  After all, we’d already seen her discussing how much she wished she’d gotten to know her namesake in 7x14.  So why couldn’t Spirit Robin drop in to say hello to the daughter he never got the chance to know?  It’s a bit annoying how Robin is once again being reduced to being nothing more than Regina’s love interest.  Not to mention I’m kinda miffed how we never got to see Roland again.  Why can’t Robyn get the chance to meet her half-brother?

Anyway, Henry and the rest of the New Nevengers come up with a plan to rescue Regina from Wish Henry’s dungeons. The plan involves Wish Killian and Robyn creating a diversion so Henry can sneak in and free Regina.  During this scene, we get a rather endearing interaction between Wish Killian and Robyn.  It seems that the curse on Wish Killian’s heart is getting worse, leading him to think that his time is almost up.  So he asks Robyn to look after Alice for him after he dies.  This leads to Robyn admitting that she’s planning on marrying Alice when the time is right, and she asks for Wish Killian’s blessing to propose, with Wish Killian gladly granting it.   In gratitude, Robyn informs Wish Kilian that she refuses to accept that he’ll die, stating that no matter what, he’s going to be around to walk Alice down the aisle.  With that said, Wish Killian and Robyn initiate the distraction, with Wish Killian charging at Wish Henry’s soldiers with his sword drawn and Robyn firing off a few arrows.

Down in the dungeons, Henry manages to locate Regina’s cell, but before he can get her out, they’re discovered by more of Wish Henry’s guards.  For a few tense moments, it looks as if Henry is in a real pickle. But then, out of nowhere, Snow and Charming appear.  I guess they were told about Robyn and Alice’s brief appearance in Storybrooke and, unlike Granny and the Dwarfs, weren’t so quick to dismiss their claims. And as such, have come to provide some backup.  Although, this brings up another issue.  Because Snow and Charming now know that Henry and company will eventually wind up here after Young Henry leaves on his soul-searching quest.  If that’s the case, how come Emma, Killian Prime, Regina and Zelena were caught unawares by all the stuff that went down throughout the season?  Just saying, Snow doesn’t have the best track record in keeping her mouth shut.

Time Travel Paradoxes aside, Snow and Charming convene with the New Nevengers in the Wish World equivalent of their old war room, where they discuss the matter of how to defeat Wish Rumpelstiltskin and figure out how to free Wish Henry from his grip.  It’s here that Wish Rumpelstiltskin’s ultimate plan is revealed.  Basically, he’s taking advantage of the fact that Wish Henry also holds the position of the Author.  Apparently, if the Author’s heart is filled with enough anger and malice, it can trigger some kind of spell that can trap people within their own personal Prison Book. Once inside the Prison Book, the captured person is doomed to an eternity of isolation.  And Wish Rumpelstiltskin has a Prison Book for everyone.  (I wonder.  Were A&E making an intentional reference to the Myst game series here, or is this just a coincidence?)  There’s also a scene when Wish Rumpelstiltskin tests out this Prison Book spell on Wish Blue Fairy.  Because, yeah, Rumpelstiltskin is racist against fairies no matter which version it is. Once Snowing and the New Nevengers learn of this plan, they set off to find a way to stop him.  Snowing decide to go off and try and inspire the people of the surrounding villages to not lose hope.  Not sure what that would accomplish, to be honest.  Maybe they felt that, if the New Nevengers couldn’t find a way to prevent everyone from getting trapped, then the trapped people would still have hope that they could escape and therefore not give into despair. Either way, I can’t help but think this might have resulted in a lot of confused villagers.  After all, in Wish World, Snow and Charming were not only dead, but had also been considerably older.  Wouldn’t seeing a younger version of the dead monarchs lead to a lot of confusion?  

Regardless, Wish Killian, Henry, Alice and Robyn head off to try and find Rumpelstiltskin Prime, who has been off doing his own thing (which involved him revisiting his memories of Belle via dreamcatcher and being morose over the fact that he probably won’t be able to rejoin her in the afterlife now that the Guardian no longer exists).  And Regina goes off to face Wish Henry, in the hopes that she can convince him to let go of his anger so the Prison Book spell couldn’t be cast.  Can’t remember where Parallel Ella, Lucy and Past!Zelena went during this whole thing. They just kinda disappeared from the episode at this point.  Maybe they went with Snow and Charming?  Who knows?

When they locate Rumpelstiltskin Prime, he reveals that he’s discovered Wish Rumpelstiltskin has managed to squirrel away a bit of backup magic in case he ever found himself of need of it.  Rumpelstiltskin Prime decides to utilize that bit of magic in order to rip out Wish Rumpelstiltskin’s heart.  If he can do that, then it will all be over.  (Wasn’t that what they tried to do with Evil Queenie Poo when Regina drank the Jekyll Juice? Look how well that one went over.)  However, it doesn’t matter, because Wish Rumpelstiltskin makes his appearance known at that point and proceeds to gloat that he’s already succeeded in corrupting Wish Henry’s heart.  To prove his statement, he conjures up the Prison Books for Henry, Wish Killian, Robyn and Alice.  And because Wish Henry is, at that very moment, engaged in a duel with Regina, the Prison Book spell begins to activate, with the five of them getting sucked towards their individual Prison Books.

This scene gets rather nail biting, as Henry, Robyn, Alice, Wish Killian and Rumpelstiltskin Prime are all trying to hold on to a nearby long table for dear life, but it’s clear that they won’t be able to hold on forever.  This is driven home when Alice starts to lose her grip, much to Robyn and Wish Killian’s horror.  In desperation, Wish Killian, disregarding his cursed heart, maneuvers himself close enough to Alice to grab hold of her just as her grip on the long table fails.

However, in the nick of time, Regina manages to get through to Wish Henry, stating that he isn’t alone that his life means everything to her, etc. etc.  This apparently works, as Wish Henry relents, allowing Regina to embrace him. To be honest, this seemed a bit anticlimactic, but I guess Wish Henry was already starting to second guess himself, since he’d realized Regina willingly approached him despite knowing that he probably wouldn’t have listened to what she had to tell him. But the moment he gives up on getting revenge on Regina, the Prison Book spell stops.

Unfortunately, it seems like it’s too late for Wish Killian, as the effort involved in keeping Alice from getting sucked up into her Prison Book resulted in his cursed heart completely giving out.  As a devastated Alice cradles his body in her arms, Rumpelstiltskin Prime has a final confrontation with Wish Rumpelstiltskin.  They pretty much go back and forth for a bit over which version of them is the strong one, with Wish Rumpelstiltskin stating that Rumpelstiltskin Prime has become a pathetic shell of his former self and Rumpelstiltskin Prime stating that he’s actually evolved into the strongest form of himself. Eventually, Rumpelstiltskin Prime reveals he’s finally learned the moral of the story- that doing good doesn’t count if you’re only doing it for the reward.  You have to do the right thing just because it’s the right thing.  With those words, he uses the magic he got from Wish Rumpelstiltskin’s backup stock to rip out his own heart so he can place it within Wish Killian’s body. This ends up killing not just Rumpelstiltskin Prime but Wish Rumpelstiltskin as well.  Okay, that’s great and all.  But I’m still scratching my head over how Wish Rumpelstiltskin’s life was somehow tethered to Rumpelstiltskin Prime.  It’s not as if they were connected through Jekyll Juice the way Regina and Evil Queenie Poo were in S6.  Just saying, it’s not as if Wish Killian would die if Killian Prime died.

Also, how would this magical transplant thing help bring Wish Killian back to life?  It didn’t exactly help Victor Frankenstein’s brother.  Or Daniel.  The only known case of this working was with Snow and Charming, when they performed the heart spilt.  And it was pretty much stated that this only worked because Snow and Charming were True Love. So how exactly would Rumpelstiltskin Prime’s heart bring Wish Killian back to life?

Regardless of how it doesn’t make a lot of sense, it still works.  Not that I’m complaining, of course.  Especially since it means that Wish Killian is no longer affected by the Curse of the Poisoned Heart, which enables him to properly hug Alice at last. And because Rumpelstiltskin Prime died doing the right thing for the right reasons, and without caring about the reward, he ends up being granted a reprieve.  Which allows him to reunite with Belle in the afterlife.  Those of you who know me know that I’ve been more or less opposed to Rumbelle since the start of S4.  But to be honest, I guess I can live with this.  After all, it really seems as if Rumpelstiltskin FINALLY learned his lesson this time and realized that good deeds don’t count if you’re only doing them to earn brownie points.  That’s kinda on par with Christian teachings.  Even someone who repents of their sins at the last minute is granted forgiveness.  The ONLY thing that bothers me about how this turned out is the fact that we’re told Rumpelstiltskin’s happy ending doesn’t in any way include his LIVING SON! What’s poor Gideon supposed to do now? He’s completely alone in the world now.

Also, I noticed something during this episode.  Wish Henry seems to have a scar above his eyebrow.  And in that scene when Young Henry was fighting the dragon at the start of the last episode, he ended up getting a nasty cut in the same place. Does that mean that was actually supposed to be Wish Henry in the opening scene of last episode?  If so, why was Wish Rumpelstiltskin saying he came all the way from the Wish Realm?  Wouldn’t the fact that we were looking at Wish Henry mean we were IN Wish World?  I’m so confused.

And now, we’ve come to the aftermath. An undetermined amount of time later, Henry Prime and Wish Henry both approach Regina, who has been off on her own reflecting on everything that has happened.  It’s here that Regina reveals she’s got an idea.  She’s found the Wish World version of the scroll she’d used to cast the original Dark Curse (because Wish Regina never got the chance to utilize it.)  She states she plans on using it, but with some drastic alterations.  Instead of crushing the heart of the thing she loves the most, she plans to combine the love of all the people she cares about to turn the Dark Curse into something else.  Basically, instead of bringing people into the Land Without Magic and separating everyone, this new twist on the Dark Curse will essentially merge all of the magical realms together.  In other words, all the different realms in the entire multiverse will be joined together into one gigantic realm tucked away inside a pocket dimension located in a secluded corner of Maine.

Okay, to be perfectly honest, I’m still unsure how I feel about this.  I mean, at face value, I can see how that might be cool.  As Regina points out, it would mean that nobody would be separated from one another by dimensional barriers anymore.  And you wouldn’t have to worry about locating a magic bean anymore to realm jump.  (Though I suppose that’s going to put Anton out of a job.)  Not to mention the obvious pros.  This would mean that Emma would now be able to visit her friend, Elsa, at any time.  And it’ll be that much easier for Ruby to swing by with Dorothy to see Granny and her BFF, Snow, during certain weekends. 

But there are some pretty significant problems that I don’t think they bothered to address before they came up with this idea:

1) What if the people who lived in the different realms didn’t want to be directly linked to Storybrooke?  Granted I got the impression during, that whole flyby of the newly established United Realms, it still looks like each realm is still granted their own designated area.  They’re not made an actual part of Storybrooke.  I guess it could be compared to the United States, in a way. Texas and California are technically part of the same county, but they’re still able to be treated as separate from one another.  But even so, it’s rather presumptuous of Regina to make the decision to combine all the realms together without bothering to see how the people in all the different realms felt about it.  Considering the way Grumpy and the others greeted Alice and Robyn when they first arrived in Storybrooke, I can see the people in the other realms wanting as much distance between them and that town as possible.

2) Wouldn’t this introduce a lot of new dangers to Storybrooke and the other realms?  If you’re going to connect all the realms together, you’re kinda making it easier for ogres, the Jabberwocky, and people like Blackbeard to have limitless access to areas they didn’t have before.  Not to mention the fact that there might be certain diseases that could now spread rampant, leading to possible epidemics.  Just saying, think of how many Native Americans died from things like smallpox when the Europeans brought the disease over with them.  In much the same way, there might be a particular illness that the people of Oz have developed a natural immunity to while denizens of Wonderland might have never been exposed to it before.

3) The fact that Wish World is being included in this whole plan is going to potentially lead to a lot of confusion.  Because there’s now going to be two versions of practiclly everybody. We’re talking two Grannys, two Augusts, two sets of Dwarfs etc.  The only people in Storybrooke who won’t have a doppelganger are Snowing and Geppetto, since Wish Snowing and Wish Geppetto are dead.  And of course Emma, because I think we’re now supposed to conclude Wish World and its entire history was created around Emma.  On the other hand, there’s probably going to be THREE Reginas running around- Regina Prime, Evil Queenie Poo (who had settled into Enchanted Forest Prime with Wish Robin) and the now elderly Wish Regina.  I’m sorry, but do we really need that many Reginas? To quote Killian Prime from 3x05:  ‘I can barely stomach one.’

4) The obvious time paradox going on right now.  If this whole ordeal in Hyperion Heights and Wish World have been taken place in the past, around the time when Young Henry left home in 7x01, then wouldn’t this mess around with the timeline?  So, you’re telling me that Henry Prime was off adventuring in Parallel Enchanted Forest at the same time that Post-Adventure Regina was merging all the realms together?  If that was the case, shouldn’t Pre-Adventure Regina have already known everything was going to happen?  Not to mention that this probably means Robyn has to share legroom with her five-year-old self.  Show, you’re not Doctor Who!  You don’t get to throw this Wibbly-Wobbly-Timey-Wimey crap at me!

Regardless, this plan of Regina is put into effect.  And in the big fly-by over the new United Realms, we see quite a few cameos.  While I’m sure I’m missing some, I believe I spotted the Nautilus, Tinkerbell, the Queen’s Castle from the Enchanted Forest, Camelot (I think), Oz, Arendelle, the Beanstalk, Agrabah, and the Land of Untold Stories.  We also catch a glimpse of a dragon.  According to an off-camera conversation between Regina and Zelena, the dragon we see is Lily.  Indecently, we FINALLY get acknowledgement that Lily tracked down her Dragon Daddy. Turns out that the mystery father was Zorro.  Because apparently Zorro can turn into a dragon in this universe.  Interesting choice.

But that brings us to the final epilogue.  Zelena is bringing Regina to Snow and Charming’s castle in the Enchanted Forest Prime sector.  (Wonder where Chad was during this scene.  Didn’t Zelena end up marrying him?)  It’s revealed that they plan on crowning Regina as the supreme ruler of the United Realms.  Ugh, yeah. Don’t get me wrong, because as I’ve said before, I’ve mostly been okay with Regina throughout this season.  But why should she get to be the Supreme Ruler?  Why does there even need to be a Supreme Ruler in the first place?  You can’t tell me all the other royals were okay with this.  People like Tiana & Naveen, Elsa, Jasmine, Rapunzel Prime, Guinevere, Merida, Thomas & Ella Prime, Abigail & Fredrick, and Anastasia and Will from Wonderland Prime.  Are they all supposed to defer to Regina now?   You can’t seriously tell me that they all were okay with that.  But that’s what Snow is claiming, so whatever.  Which reminds me- we get a brief appearance of Little Neal during this scene.  He’s actually stopped being a baby.  It looks like he’s now….maybe five or six?  I’m not really good at guessing the ages of little kids simply by sight.  But the point is that he’s actually not stuck as a baby anymore.  So kudos to him.

And so Regina gets crowned as Supreme Ruler of the United Realms.  Although, there is a much welcome interruption to the proceedings.  Namely Emma and Killian Prime, who come bursting in after arriving late.  (With Emma announcing that she’s sorry that she’s late, which was obviously meant to be a callback to how Regina crashed Snow and Charming’s wedding in the Pilot.) The explanation is that their newborn daughter was being fussy and that’s what had delayed them.  Even though I knew it was coming, it was still such a joy to see Emma again, looking as gorgeous as ever.  She even was wearing her trademark red leather jacket over the pretty pink dress she wore for the occasion.  And Killian Prime (who apparently still has his pirate regalia) really did look like a slightly disheveled first-time father.  Even though there were moments when the baby he was carrying was so obviously a doll.  Also, I can’t tell you how thrilling it was to hear Emma actually refer to Killian Prime as Henry’s stepfather.  Yeah, I realize that’s what he was all along, but to just hear it verbalized was wonderful.  And yes, we learn the CS baby was named Hope.  While it’s not the name I would have picked, since I think that’s a bit too flowery, I guess it makes sense.  Especially considering the lives Emma and Killian Prime led before they found each other, and how their love story unfolded.

Once the excitement of Emma, Killian Prime and Baby Hope’s arrival has died down, the coronation of Supreme Ruler Regina continues.  Again, why was Regina picked for this role?  Wouldn’t Emma have been the better choice?  Not only was she the one who originally brought everyone together through her role as the Savior, but she was also the one who was robbed of her royal birthright.  Wouldn’t it have been more satisfying to see Emma finally being recognized as the ruler she was always meant to be?  Look, I get that Regina was the one who came up with this whole idea of the United Realms and all.  But as much as select Regina fans would like to think otherwise, Regina wasn’t the main character.  Emma was. So why is the final episode so focused on Regina?  For crying out loud, she wasn’t even the focus of this final season.  This season was supposed to be predominantly about Henry, and he barely did anything in this series finale.  But I guess it’s pointless to harp on it, as it’s already said and done.  At least the ending montage was beautifully done.  Yeah, during Supreme Ruler Regina’s coronation speech, in which she talks about how there are sure to be many more adventures, we get an amazing montage sequence that exhibits various moments from the show’s entire run.  I won’t deny that I LOVED that moment.  It was so nice to be able to look back on how far this show has come.  At the same time, this montage really drove home that this was it.  This was the final episode of Once Upon a Time.  And if that wasn’t enough, the episode even ends with one final glimpse of Storybrooke, including the Yellow Bug (which is thankfully not encased in stone along with Stone Troll), ending with a shot of the green road sign that reads ‘Leaving Storybrooke.’

And that’s it, folks.  Our show has come to an end.  While I knew this day would come eventually, and I’m glad it came when it did, it still feels surreal.  We’re never going to see our favorite characters again.  This will be the last time we see them grace our TV screens. Sure, we still have the novelizations, which I will probably read at some point.  And I believe Jen and Colin said they would not be opposed to making a Captain Swan movie at some point.  But even if that movie never gets greenlighted, I think it’s safe to say that this is a show that will live on in my heart, in spite of the issues that sprung up throughout the years.  And I will always be grateful to the show’s seven years, and the friends I made within the fandom.

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#ouat episode analysis #ouat 7x22 #ouat finale #henry mills #parallel!cinderella #lucy mills #regina mills #zelena #robyn hood #alice jones #wish world!killian #rumpelstiltskin #wish world!Rumpelstiltskin #wish world!henry #snow white #prince charming #emma swan #killian jones #hope swan jones #robin hood #belle french #snowing #captain swan #outlaw queen #rumbelle #swan jones family #knightrook #curious archer #glass believer

[dirtylevi]

Do you think Reiner can actually kill himself by blowing his brains out (I mean, he survived getting half of his head chopped off before)? And why do you think he's doing it?

Hello, hello you beautiful anon!

DISCLAIMER: This is my personal opinion. In no way am I stating what I say here is canon or completely accurate. if you disagree with my opinion, that’s perfectly fine! Everyone has a different interpretation, but if you are going to send me messages trying to argue points of view with me or send me hate messages; please do us both a favor and just don’t even bother with it. WARNINGS: Major spoilers & mentions of attempted suicide ahead!

I’m really glad you asked me this because I’ve been seeing a lot of different POV’s on these two subjects and I’m always excited to throw my two cents in when it’s wanted. As usual, I will be putting this under a Read More due to the length of my response and the content of spoiler panels that are present. Also, this is completely unedited, so please excuse any spelling or grammatical errors! Now then, let me start off by saying that a gun shot wound to the head would have most definitely killed Reiner if he truly wanted it to. 

While it is true that he had his head blown off in Shiganshina and managed to survive, there was an action taken by Reiner that allowed that to happen, which is basically the fact that his brain functions were intact within his body and not within his skull.

This was something he did on purpose in order to survive, but had he not triggered the action fast enough or at all; Levi’s attempt at killing him would have been successful. This ability, accompanied with him being in full titan form is what allowed him to survive having his entire brain and half of his skull blown completely off. Not just his titan shifting ability.

So in this situation, if Reiner did actually pull the trigger on the rifle, the only way he would have survived it is if he purposefully moved his brain functions throughout his body in a split second. 

Basically, if Reiner wants to kill himself; he absolutely can. His titan healing abilities alone would not be enough to save him from a direct gunshot wound to the head. He has to activate certain properties in order to survive such lethal injuries, and he has to allow his body to regenerate. Reiner isn’t like how Eren used to be. He is in full control of his titan power and knows the ins and outs of what he can and cannot do with it. if he doesn’t want to activate the healing abilities or the last ditch survival mechanisms he has at his disposal; he doesn’t have to. This has been proven before:

So yes, Reiner could die by shooting himself if he truly wished to do so. 

Now, as far as why I believe he’s reached a point in which he almost committed suicide; welp, let’s just walk through this man’s life, shall we? Allow me to start with these panels:

Much like what I stated about Eren in the meta I wrote about him last night, Here, Reiner seems to have realized that what he was taught growing up, and what he was force fed to believe was actually a complete lie. The Eldian’s of Paradis were not much different and no worse than him. They were just people caught along in the drift and forced to believe propaganda and lies fed to them by their government, and that they too, were living and fighting in a hell all their own. One they were fighting and dying left and right to be free of and one not much different from his own.

Reiner realizes this, and he hates himself for it. Because not only does it betray his duty as a Warrior, but it also forces him to see how much damage he has caused. Not only to the people of Paradis that he grew to care for, but betrayed. But also to his Warrior comrades that he also cared for, and let get captured or killed due to his extreme need to prove himself as a Warrior. 

Bottom line is, he lives his life currently bound in endless regret, and he has absolutely no one to talk to about what he has experienced and gone through in the last few years. When he is asked about the people of Paradis and inquired to as to whether or not they truly are evil devil’s, he actually laughs and gives back a sarcastic retort. Making it very clear to his mother that he doesn’t see them as Devil’s at all. 

His own mother, the one person he strove to become a Warrior for refuses to listen to him at risk of her family losing the Armored Titan inheritance. She knows Reiner’s time is coming to an end, and instead of worrying for him or trusting in his experience, she’s screeching at Gabi that of course the island dwellers are evil. Of course they’re devil’s, and the Devil’s must be purged. That she must take up the reigns of Reiner’s power by fucking eating him and killing them all in order to free the “better Eldians”. 

Reiner’s eyes as she cuts him off before he can answer Gabi’s question says it all. The people of Paradis aren’t Devils at all. At least, not in his eyes, but he can’t say that out loud because it will get him, and his entire family killed, and no one, not even his own mother would believe him anyways. 

So, once dinner is said and done and Reiner is left to his thoughts, he contemplates what made him want to become a Warrior in the first place. Which, as stated above, was his mother and wanting to make her happy. 

He busted his ass for his mother so she could become an honorary Marlian and finally be with his father. So they could all be one big, happy, free family living comfortably. But, that backfires as soon as he’s finally gained the Armored Titan and goes to meet his father in person for the first time to deliver the happy news. 

His father basically tells him that he is nothing more than a mistake that he has every intention of running from. A devil. And Reiner realizes that what he had worked so hard for was already all for naught. 

However, in order to prove himself and to make his mother proud, and to also uphold his duty as a proud Warrior of Marley, Reiner went on the mission to take the Founding Titan. And in the midsts of the very start of said mission, Reiner got another rude awakening. 

Reiner was a boy who worked his ass off, all for the sake of making his mother happy and to finally have a normal life with his family. He studied, he trained, and he dealt with constant bullying, but in the end, he inherited the Armored Titan. He was granted a chance to achieve his dream, and on his path toward hope; he was told that it was only by manipulation that he was chosen over Porko. That it wasn’t his skill, or his resolve that granted him his power. It was the actions of someone who put the life of their family over his. 

This crushed Reiner even further, and in the middle of learning the truth of his position, Marcel, the very person who told him the truth is killed while saving his life. 

At this point, Reiner had indeed lost everything. He lost his chance at becoming a family [when in reality he never actually had one]. He lost his faith in himself, and he lost one of his comrades. But after running away from the titan we know to be Ymir, and confronted by Annie to return and look for her to take back the Jaw Titan; Reiner again, thinks of his mother, and making her happy. 

Point blank, Reiner freaks at the thought of letting her down. At failing the mission and going home empty handed because not only will he die, but he will also never achieve his dream. So, after convincing Annie and Bertoldt that their lives would also be at risk for losing the Jaw titan, and Annie says this to him in response:

Reiner responds right back. Telling her that if his death is what it will take for them to all go back home; then fine. He’s dead. He’ll become Marcel and make sure they all return back alive and with something in hand.

Fact of the matter is, Reiner lost his Warrior spirit slowly but surely the longer he lived within Paradis, and the loss of Annie and Bertoldt only added to the sins and unfulfilled promises piled upon his shoulders. 

Reiner helped kill over 250,000 innocent people as a plan to lure out the Founding Titan. He murdered comrades such as Marco due to his twisted sense of duty as a Warrior. He betrayed countless people who actually appreciated and loved him solely to keep his promise to Annie and Bertoldt. He berated Annie’s dedication and questioned her loyalty, while also feeding into the life the grew to enjoy within the walls of Paradis. And in the process of doing all of these things, he lost his sense of which side was right, and which was wrong due to burying all of these actions subconsciously beneath the persona of Marcel. 

Reiner already let part of himself die to make up for the death of Marcel. To fufill his duty and to carry out his promise to the end, but in doing that, he used the Marcel persona to cope with his sins, and his personality actually split in half over time. 

His memories became sporadic, and his actions became contradictory, and only when faced with the reality that Eren has the Coordinate power and the presence of Zeke on the island, does Reiner seem to fully fall back into his warrior self. He see’s the light at the end of the tunnel. He sees the very goal he came to the island with just a few inches from his grasp, but with the battle in Shiganshina takes place right after Zeke claims they will recue Annie after their victory; Reiner gets another severe dose of reality again in the form of complete and utter defeat. 

The wrath of those he does care for, but shouldn’t. The anger of those betrayed, and knowing deep down the he deserves it, all added in with the failure of keeping his promise to get Annie and Bertoldt home alive with something in hand still haunts him to this day. 

This man’s life has been absolute hell. He failed his mission, he failed to keep his word, he failed his mother, he failed his comrades, he failed his friends, and he failed himself. At least, that is most likely how Reiner sees it all. 

He spent a five years wading in one war that he learned was grossly misguided only for it to fail and cause another war with a different nation which is also grossly misguided. He’s realized that most of what he believed was a lie. He’s realized that all he fought for on the path of his own hell simply led to a different hell and then back around again. 

And now, he’s alone. Ridiculed by Porko and constantly being reminded that someone, someday here soon is going to devour him to continue the legacy of Marley with the power of the armored titan. And not only is he being told he will die soon, but he’s also being shown that his own family will most likely be the one to take up the torch and walk straight back into the hell that got him to mindset that he’s now currently in. 

So in order to atone for what he’s done. To “repent his sins” and make up for everything he failed to do while also keeping the Armored Titan and the path of absolute carnage ridden hell out of reach from Gabi; Reiner chose this:

It was a very sad moment, but don’t despair. He’s walked a hard road with a lot of mistakes, but Reiner is aware of his wrong doings and still has a lot of experiences to contribute to the world. He still has things to do and people that rely on him. He isn’t alone in the world and there are people who have the ability to understand him and listen to what he’s gone through. People who can learn from him and and all of the mistakes he made.

There are people who can walk the path to hell more righteously than he did and protect those he knows needs protecting. Even after everything, even for Reiner, there are people worth living for, and people worth dying for. 

#snk #snk spoilers #snk 97 #reiner braun #shingeki no kyojin #meta #Anonymous