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guxciestone · 4 months

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🌾 ❛ THE MOON AND YOUR DESIRED ROUTINE ༉‧₊˚ ˚୨୧

(through the signs)

🌳✧

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hey guys. this post is about the moon and the type of routine that you may prefer based on the sign that lands in it. i hope you enjoy the post! ♡🌿

if you have any tarot or astrology post suggestions, i’d be more than willing to consider them. just drop your suggestions in my asks or in my post notes :)

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— the moon and its meaning ꕥ

The moon is the planet of emotions, your internal world, where you find personal comfort, and where you find inner fulfillment. However, others tend to forget that the moon is a feminine and nocturnal planet that also rules patterns, cycles, and flow states. In a female’s chart, it rules over her menstrual cycle, her emotional flow throughout the month, and her inner states throughout the 28-day cycle; in a male’s chart, it rules over his emotional health and character as well as his inner child in a vulnerable and instinctual sense. Furthermore, in general, the moon could also indicate the routines and “personal flow” that one strives for daily to achieve comfort and satisfaction. Today, I am going to analyze what type of routine you prefer based on the sign your moon is placed in.

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moon in aries˚☽˚｡⋆.

Individuals with Moon in Aries seek spontaneousness, thrills, leadership, and independence in their daily life and routines. They are particularly comfortable being constantly being on the move, hoping to discover a new venture, or taking on a new challenge. They wake up every morning with the intention of reflecting on what new battle they can fight today. Furthermore, they are one of the signs who are more comfortable with managing sporadic and unorganized schedules because they initiate a new project every other day. It is assured they do not get overwhelmed easily, but they could easily become explosive or impulsive in their actions or feelings when stressed or things do not go according to plan. These individuals could get very impatient as well, striving to get things done in a short amount of time; this could be particularly overwhelming for others and burdening for them in the long run. They often struggle to stay focused on a venture due to their hastiness and tendency to lose interest easily. They should learn how to start projects, manage them, and finish them victoriously; plus, learn how to be patient and take their time, so their ideas can successfully manifest in what they expected from the beginning. Additionally, individuals with Moon in Aries are self-interested. They prefer spending time on activities, hobbies, or endeavors that they could benefit or improve from. Not to mention, they are risk-takers. These individuals seek fulfillment from new experiences and circumstances because it gives excitement and stimulation.

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moon in taurus ˚☽˚｡⋆.

Individuals with Moon in Taurus seek comfort, security, and stability in their daily life and routines. They often are satisfied with an unsurprising and easy-going routine–not too sporadic or unpredictable like Aries Moons. They seek calm and quietness in their life with not much stress. It is particularly easier for these individuals to get overwhelmed–especially over an unexpected task added to their schedule. You will often notice that these people strive for financial stability in their personal goals because they know that it will give them the material comfort they hope to have. Furthermore, they are more inclined to do self-care and relaxation practices as it gives them a sense of self-esteem and levelheadness–they especially need it after a long day at work or school. Additionally, Moon in Taurus individuals prefer to take their life in getting their errands done, and they dislike being rushed. They may struggle with changing their routine or daily activities for any person or circumstance because it is what is appropriate for them. They should learn how to modify their schedule for important events and relationships.

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moon in gemini ˚☽˚｡⋆.

Individuals with Moon in Gemini seek learning, socialization, activity, and communication in their daily life and routine. These people are often striving to mentally challenge themselves and find ways to stimulate themselves all the time. That is why you will often find these individuals with chaotic and packed schedules, or they seem to always be occupied–it is because they are always hoping to learn something new, access their creativity and skill, or challenge their brain. They would like to spend their time playing puzzles, word searches, reading, or debating with certain groups. Furthermore, these folks are extremely social and always wanting to connect with their peers; they might seek to find time in the day to meet up with their friends. Additionally, they have the tendency of wanting to do everything they want to do all at once–and they can often get very disorganized and ungrounded while doing so. It is important for people with Moon in Gemini to learn how to take things slow and collect their thoughts and plans before everything turns into a mess.

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moon in cancer ˚☽˚｡⋆.

Individuals with Moon in Cancer seek comfort, security, emotional counsel, and familial connections in their daily life and routine. These people could adore spending time with their family members or their close loved ones immensely; they are the types to consider their cousins or siblings their true friends and desire to do everything with them. They could more than likely desire to spend time at home, and perhaps may prefer to work from home too. Additionally, with a person who has Moon in Cancer– you could find that mostly everything on their daily to-do list consists of errands they need to do surrounding the house (such as doing laundry, cleaning their room, etc.) They might also like taking care of people. It is integral for cancer moons to have a schedule in which they can feel safe and comfortable doing, especially in a sense where it is not far from home or their close connections. However, these people could easily become homesick or struggle to adhere to changes or circumstances far from their safe spot.

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moon in leo ˚☽˚｡⋆.

Individuals with Moon in Leo seek entertainment, creativity, and recognition in their daily life and routines. These people strongly value and prioritize their inner child and their ability to artistically express themselves. They could be particularly interested in the arts, music, performing, acting, or anything in which they can demonstrate themselves and their character in an inspiring way. These folks hope to find fun and excitement in their life through their hobbies and passions. In other words, these people do not function well in routines in which they do not have creative freedom or the time to indulge in their childish endeavors. Furthermore, Leo moons are generous and kind at heart. They are more than likely to be able to handle children for long periods of time; in fact, they could adore implementing kids into their daily routine. Additionally, they prefer to connect with others and spend time with loved ones in circumstances in which they can lead them by example. However, these individuals could instantly turn bratty or spoiled when things do not go their way. If their day seems to be going terrible, it is easy for them to become explosive or stubborn. Leo moons should learn to be more selfless when it comes to compromising their plans and endeavors within the day sometimes.

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moon in virgo ˚☽˚｡⋆.

Individuals with Moon in Virgo seek discipline, order, and practicality in their daily life and routines. They are the type of people to plan their entire day on a to-do list or structure it from start to finish. Furthermore, they value productivity and making good use of themselves and their time. So, you will usually see them working on a particular project, improving themselves in some way, or investing their time into developing a special skill. These folks prefer a system in their day-to-day activities, or otherwise, they’ll feel out of control with themselves. Although these people are particularly able to change their routines and create an entirely new structure, they prefer to keep things predictable–especially when it comes to dedicating themselves to specific future aspirations and ventures. One thing about them is that they will always work on their craft, one way or another. Additionally, virgo moons can also value cleanliness in their physical environment. It is easy for their mood to change if their environment isn’t aligned with their mindset, so they could prioritize cleaning their area and making sure every item is in the right place. However, they often have tendencies of being a control freak–expecting things to go the exact way they planned or trying to handle anything or anyone that disrupts their plans. This placement is also known for its perfectionism. These individuals need to work on their excessive need for things to be 100% flawless; it could easily lead them to stress and low self-esteem, making them believe that everything they do is wrong and that they need to reach up to their extremely high expectations. In other words, virgo moons need to learn how to calm down and accept that things can be imperfect and that they can make mistakes or “fail”.

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moon in libra ˚☽˚｡⋆.

Individuals with Moon in Libra seek peace, balance, and beauty in their daily life and routines. These people often strive for a clear and collected mind space; they hope to eliminate any conflict, confrontations, or issues in their life. They would often try to stabilize themselves through acts of meditation, self-care, socializing, or cleaning. Furthermore, these people often strive to romanticize their lives; it allows them to enjoy their circumstances better through the acts of art, beauty, reflection, and creativity. They adore investing in makeup, fashion, painting, music, and other pleasurable things. Additionally, they are one of the most social moon signs; they thrive when they interact with their interpersonal relationships. It makes them feel connected and close to the important people in their lives. One thing about Libra Moons is that they often try to go far to avoid conflicts, even if it is something they need to confront or take accountability for. This can often make them appear a bit indifferent or distant in times of disagreements and discordance. However, shoving issues into the backburner will not solve anything–they need to learn to confront conflicts and problems and handle them maturely.

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moon in scorpio ˚☽˚｡⋆.

Individuals with Moon in Scorpio seek privacy, intimacy, depth, and intensity in their daily life and routines. First and foremost, these people often prefer to undergo their errands and plans under the radar–they do not feel particularly comfortable with anyone knowing their next move. That is why you’ll often see that these folks do not post often on social media, or they dislike telling people what their plans are for the day. There could be an undertone of paranoia in why they choose not to do so. They just value their intimate space and refuse to let any outside energies intervene with it. So, they need secrecy more than anything. Furthermore, when it comes to activities, they also would like to do them with people who they hold very close–similar to Moon in Cancer–but they are more reserved and strict about it. When they are in a relationship, you’ll find that they would want to spend most of the time with their partner. It can almost get obsessive. It is important for these people to learn to not become obsessive with their loved ones or partners–to let go and learn independence in their quality time.

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moon in sagittarius ˚☽˚｡⋆.

Individuals with Moon in Sagittarius seek excitement, new experiences, and diversity in their daily life and routines. One thing about these folks is that they are always striving to be on the move–similar to their fire counterparts. They are always on the move for the next huge and exhilarating thing. You’ll find that these individuals desire to travel, go to parties, spend time with friends, or meet new people. However, they are also very intelligent and have a will to learn–so they also hope to gain a new perspective from these experiences and circumstances. These people might dedicate a certain time of the day to learning about a topic, investing in a religion, or studying a course. It is integral for these people to have a routine that gives them a new learning experience or something to have faith about; otherwise, these individuals could become hopeless or pessimistic. However, it is easy for these people to become overindulgent or lazy–not being considerate about the consequences or their future. There needs to be a balance between fun and seriousness.

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moon in capricorn ˚☽˚｡⋆.

Individuals with Moon in Capricorn seek achievement, structure, and influence in daily life and routines. Similar to virgo moons, they value being productive and useful with their time—in their case, they hope that their time could lead them to ultimate success and recognition. These people may like to work many hours or put in much time to their career endeavors. This often leaves them little to no quality time for their loved ones and friends. Furthermore, these folks are very patient and precise in their actions as they are able to build things from the ground up and maintain a vision for a long period of time. That is why they are often good planners and can easily build a business or company if they desired to. However, they need to make sure that they do not overwork themselves, isolate themselves from pleasures and socialization, and develop strong control issues; it could easily lead them down the road to stress, burn out, or depression. Additionally, since they are serious individuals, they may struggle with maintaining a balance outlook on the things they need to do and the things they do for the fun of it. They should learn how to maintain balance with work and pleasure—because one without the other could wreak havoc.

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moon in aquarius ˚☽˚｡⋆.

Individuals with Moon in Aquarius seek community, electrifying experiences, and goals in their daily life and routines. These people are always hoping to spend time with their community–people who are similar to them because they make them feel like they belong, and they adore making people feel like they belong as well. However, people tend to forget to give credit for how hardworking these folks are. They might dedicate most of their time in the day to working towards their hopes and dreams. These individuals desire to live a life in which everything is served to justice, equality, and peace–a place they can live in, a life they can adhere to. Therefore, these people are very dedicated to working towards their aspirations for the sake of themselves and the people they care about. Additionally, they strive for unpredictability in their routine. They want something different everyday in their errands–something erratic and thrilling. However, there could be too much unpredictableness to the point of instability in their actions. It is important to find a balance in that too.

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moon in pisces ˚☽˚｡⋆.

Individuals with Moon in Pisces seek imagination, spirituality, creativity, and the unknown in their daily life and routines. These people prefer to stay in their heads and work out the dreams and fantasies that they have in their mind. Even if they are forced to live in the practical world, it is important that pisces moons always operate from the place of visualizing their creative ideas and manifestations. These are the types to invest most of their time into different mediums of spirituality such as meditation, journaling, the occult, manifestation, or connecting to the unknown or spirit world. Furthermore, they would like to invest their energy into artistic hobbies such as photography, painting, drawing, music, fashion, or modeling. However, it is easy for these individuals to get lost in their subconscious and completely neglect their physical circumstances. There could even be instances in which they use vices to escape from the world (such as alcohol, drugs, or if they are in a relationship, a person) There seems to be this need for balance when it comes to the spiritual and the practical–perhaps even setting boundaries because these people are also very compassionate and kind. There could be times in which they feel the need to change their schedule for the sake of the people they care about even if they are not able to.

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#astrology #natal chart #guxciestone #zodiac #astro observations #astro community #tarot #astrology observations #pick a card #tarot community

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waspredteeth · 1 month

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the thing about Damian, especially pre-Robin, is that you have to straddle a line between child and cult assassin. He’s a nuanced character, you can’t dumb him down or simplify him. (On that note: PLEASE stop calling him feral! It’s pretty racist!)

You cannot make other characters be nice and understanding to him from the start like Dick or Tim or Jason. You cannot make them treat him like a toddler below his actual age.

You also cannot make him a irredeemable psychopath who exists only to hurt Tim and sow conflict. Because that’s just straight up not true. Fanon.

Writing Damian needs to be a balance between these, and he needs this nuance to be interesting.

If everyone treats him softly, then there’s no point for Damian’s personality as it is. He is rude and arrogant and abrasive for a reason. You could argue that he’s spoiled, but he’s also a child who was ripped from a culture he knew and thrust into the arms of a white family who don’t understand him and don’t make the effort to actually teach him their views. He’s rude and angry because there is no place for him there, not until Robin, and even then he is still subject to their judgements. If everyone treats him with kid gloves, then his attitude comes without justification and doesn’t make sense.

Please remember that when Damian first appeared in comics, everyone except Talia disliked him. Bruce wasn’t sure what to do with him, but he also was quick to scream obedience. From Dick’s inner monologue in Resurrection of Ras al Ghul and his very early interactions in Batman and Robin, he didn’t like the kid and thought him a burden to bear in the place of Bruce. Tim never once gave him mercy after the first meeting. His inner monologue and actions all speak of hate and teenage angst - some justified, some way out of line.

Damian’s anger is then reasonably apparent. He doesn’t fit in. He can’t. But he doesn’t seek violence. He doesn’t try to murder everyone in their sleep like some people think. It’s shocking that fanon’s interpretation of him is a boy who goes for the throat in every interaction. He’s snippy, but in every single comic I’ve read he’s never tried to fight someone without a justification. If he was an X-Men level telepath, then I’d argue that his actions would become worse if he really knew what people thought of him at first glance.

If you’re a child that knows he is hated, then you lash out. You test boundaries. You see what will make them exile you, hurt you. You are a brown boy surrounded by a white city in a culture that you don’t understand. You cannot see your mother again. They hate her. You cannot express yourself in a world that expects the worst. You are shackled by expectation and judgement. They won’t let you be, but they won’t let you go.

You are stuck.

And in this, you will always be.

#damian wayne #dc #robin #erm #anyway if you demonize him then I WILL call you out #reconsider your biases if you’re calling for the punishment of an Arab child #waspdoesathought #a painted bird named tamer

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princessjojo-x · 6 months

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House Synastry

1st House 💝

an instant sexual attraction even if they’re not your type or not conventionally attractive. planet usually notices house before house notices planet & planet has a natural respect for house. through this connection, house gains new feelings or discoveries abt themselves, for better or worse. (cancer placements or aries/taurus asc)

2nd House 💝

people you share this synastry with are those who’ll hype you up & have an impact on your self esteem in some way. they know exactly what to say to cheer you up & tend to tell you what you want to hear. when you're apart you lose the "high" you feel when in their company & begin to think that no one can lift you up like they can. it can cause a feeling of wanting to be around them all the time & difficulty letting them go; this is where the possessiveness stems from. also, this is the house of ‘sugar daddy’ (the provider) so there’s tendency to spoil each other, surprise each other & being affectionate with each other. they’ll either help you earn money or spend money. you feel secure & safe with this person, making this synastry is so unforgettable. you value your connection together & see long-term stability potential. this synastry can be found in many long-term/married couples. through this connection, house gains new financial endeavours, recognises under-uterlised skills or redefines their personal values. (leo placements or gemini/aries/pisces asc)

3rd House 💝

planet will make house feel comfortable & heard; planet loves talking to house & hearing houses opinions. planet understands house on a level others don't usually grasp. through this connection, house expands their thought process or ways they communicate. (virgo placements or aquarius/pisces/taurus asc)

4th House 💝

high likelihood to settle down with one another. the connection will feel familiar, comforting, reassuring & stable. an emotional attachment can be present, making partners depend on each other. however, rxship can be filled with regret. it will hurt immensely when planet leaves houses life & they’ll feel a sense of longing for them to come back. house felt like they were in good hands & found a home in planet. planet will naturally view house as a parent or potential parent. planet somehow judges & critiques house by considering & contemplating house as a parent. house naturally takes care of the needs of the planet (said needs will be determined by the planet & sign in question). that’s why planet will inevitably see house as a potential parent. planet could give house millions of reasons to hate them but house always forgive planet bc house has a soft spot for planet. through this connection, house learns a deeper understanding of themselves, their roots or their family. (libra placements or aries/aquarius/capricorn asc)

5th House 💝

instant sexual attraction even if they’re not your type or not conventionally attractive. this synastry is very fun in the beginning but needs grounding elements to stand the test of time. through this connection, house learns how to have fun, connects to their inner child or gains fun sexual experiences. (scorpio placements or sagittarius/capricorn/pisces asc)

6th House 💝

there is little chemistry with this synastry. it creates a dynamic where both partners & the rxship itself ends up feeling extremely predictable. the couple may find one specific routine/activity they like doing together or they always find themselves doing the same thing every time they’re together. this can be good or bad depending on what you want in a rxship. some dislike it bc they find it extremely boring & under-stimulating but others prefer it bc it gives them a sense of stability & reliability. house feels quite judged by planet even if this isn’t planets intention. house just feels extra shy & insecure around person. planet may publicly embarrass & hurt house. after all, it is the house of public enemies (opposite of 11th house, the house of friendship) . (sagittarius placements or aquarius/sagittarius/scorpio asc)

7th House 💝

7th (& 8th) house hold the sign of your best lover or worst enemy. however, 7th house has a a rxship theme to it (wifey/hubby chemistry) so there is generally a high likelihood of compatibility. there is a genuine like from both sides. its easy to forgive & hard to stay mad at partners you share this synastry with. (capricorn placements or libra/scorpio/capricorn asc)

8th House 💝

within this synastry, everything is felt too much & seems more intense. even a simple glance can send shivers down one’s spine. even small disputes will be hard to forgive & forget. this aspect can be felt straight away & intensifies the more partners get to know one another. platonic or sexual, interactions with one another will have a very intense undertone. it’s hard to just be “cool” or “superficial” with people share this overlay with. the connection becomes much deeper than partner’s anticipated. they planned to have a noncommittal & fun arrangement. but they suddenly want to have an official rxship & hate when that cant be fulfilled. one subconsciously sees the other as a blessing delivery or redirection to their life, even if they’re being mistreated & the rxship is toxic. this synastry almost always involves blessings disguised in suffering.

within this emotionally deep rxship, there’s a depth that pervades the connection & binds the partners together, for better or worse. if second house is self sufficiency, eight house is merging with someone else. partners suddenly want to change their life path to align with the other. for example, changing their location or career just to be interlocked with one another.

if second house is our self esteem, eight house is our weak spot. this is where our secrets reside so partners unknowingly uncover each others rawest layers. forget small talk & superfical relations. expect to unveil each-others deepest wounds, fears & desires. even if one is too scared of revealing themself, the other can read them like a book regardless. even if one is typically not the type to disclose their business, they will naturally share their whole life story with the other. partners will be able to open up completely & be understood in a way they never have before. partners bond by delving beneath the tip of the iceberg. but this can become their only point of attraction to one another, whilst their other basic needs for a rxship are not met. many people can't handle this synastry bc its so invasive & overwhelming. eight house governs the deep parts of ourselves that we want to keep hidden. when those parts are seen we feel vulnerable. partners know exactly what to say to either bring up or take down each other. this is an all or nothing rxship which flows deep enough to hurt or heal both partners. it will either cause everlasting love or everlasting trauma.

eight house governs our inner power. planet is able to easily see everything house is capable of. this breeds a rose coloured glasses effect. planet perceives house as more attractive, scary, important etc than house actually is. but this may cause planet to feel intimidated, threatened & jealous. planet’s envy of house provokes planet to gossip or betray house. on the other hand, planet may feel fascination & admiration for house. this causes planet to talk abt house a lot & this is where the infamous obsession comes from. planet may become obsessed with houses hidden side which prompts planet to cross a lot of houses boundaries. for example, planet going through houses phone or diary. when healthy, planet could have a desire to empower house or planet could feel more empowered around house. when unhealthy, planet feels powerless around house & wants to prove themselves to house. what the power struggle is abt depends on the planet. for example, venus causes a power struggle over who’s the most popular, beautiful, wealthy etc.

it's in the darkness that we find the light & it's in the intensity of these rxships that we find our true selves. romantic or platonic, these rxships are often fated & karmic. partners meet to teach each other a lesson they’ll never forget.

if second house is the sugar daddy, eight house is the sugar baby. partners may feel urged to give or gain from one another. it's advised to connect with someone you have this synastry with if they have a higher position than you professionally or materially so you can learn from them & gain from the rxship. after all,

it can be so painful if the attraction isn’t mutual which can lead you to act in ways you never thought you’d act (stalking, love spells, extremely possessive behaviour). however, if it’s mutual attraction it can be one of the most beautiful & deepest rxships. the concept of soul mates being found in eighth house synastry can be true.

most times, it is a transformative rxship but not through the way you'd often like. it will be harsh & traumatic. think of it like a major surgery, it fixes the problem within but definitely leaves a scar so you remember the pain of the recovery process.

whenever partners try to move on, there is a sense of being haunted (which is amplified if accompanied by twelve house synastry). for example, you accidentally bump into their friends or family, you see their name eveywhere, you hear the songs they like, you find people with similar faces to them. being constantly reminded of them is why it’s so hard to let them go.

this is a transformative, fated & sometimes frightening rxship full of obsession, control, friendly competition & high physical attraction. partners will have the highest of highs together & the lowest of lows together. it can be an enemies to lovers dynamic or a love/hate rxship that hurts so good. but if partners can handle it, this connection can lead to a beautiful & long lasting rxship, with great learning & genuine devotion.

(virgo/libra/sag asc or aquarius placements)

9th House 💝

shows how you can reach your best orgasms & who can give them you. this person (or you) may be from a different country or a different background. you may meet this person on a trip or somewhere out of your comfort zone. this person can open your eyes by showing you a different point of view, usually for better. there’s a lot of lessons involved. (pisces placements or scorpio/virgo/leo asc)

10th House 💝

partners may have connected through work or school & tend to bond over career related matters. house may brag abt planet. the fights between the two seem to become very public. (aries placements or (leo/cancer/libra asc)

11th House 💝

12th House 💝

this synastry is upsetting & confusing bc initially you feel like you’ve found your soulmate but eventually this person will just vanish from your life. this synastry shines a light on subconscious wounds & forces partners to face this darkness. this can cause one to ghost the other bc the intensity is too overbearing. there’s no sense of control, both partners are not sure what’s going on, which might drive both of them crazy. no matter how much communication & reassurance is provided in this rxship, partners still feel unsure how the other feels abt them or if they’re being truthful with them. theres a feeling of you shouldnt be or don’t have to be around this person anymore, yet you still are (ie sitting in silence together, confused on what to say). it’s also the house of delusion; one may forever have a secret crush on the other which will never be reciprocated. 12H synastry is more karmic, intense & uncomfortable than 8H synastry. this house is the deep parts of ourselves that we want to keep unconsciously hidden from people. when those parts are seen, we feel vulnerable, that's why many people can't deal with this overlays. it requires greater maturity to deal with our internal wounds. but if both partners can handle it, it's something very beautiful & lasting that will bring great learning. there could be a millions of reasons for planet to hate house but planet always forgives house bc planet is naive or bc planet idolises house & sees the “best” in house. planet may have hidden intentions towards house & planet is often not what they seem. , if there is a stellium here, you will be constantly coming in & out of one another's lives; this rxship will see many endings. (gemini placements or taurus/gemini/aries asc)

#astro notes #astrology #astrology synastry

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fayes-fics · 6 months

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Anthony + regency + newlyweds, reader and anthony absolutely hate each other with a passion any kink tbh

Kinktober 2023: Anthony + Hate Sex

Kinktober 2023 Masterlist

Paring: Anthony Bridgeton x fem!reader

Warnings: 18+ smut, minors DNI, arranged marriage, newlyweds, loss of female virginity, hate sex, smidge of innocence/corruption kink, dose of breeding kink, vaginal sex, creampie.

Author’s note: hi nonny 🫶 So I went with hate sex and threw in a little touch of breeding kink as well, cos I got another ask for it, and damn, it seems to be popular. So there tumblr you get two Anthony breeding kinks in a row - one modern, one Regency. This is not a drabble lol. Enjoy! 😁🧡

His wedding ring is cold against your face as he holds your jaw, inspecting your appearance up close.

“Pleasing countenance,” he opines casually; you feel vaguely like livestock being inspected before purchase at market.

How you can hate and desire someone so much and in equal measure is confounding. Married to Viscount Bridgerton in a business deal brokered by your opportunistic father, you only set eyes upon him as you walked up the church aisle earlier today. And god in heaven if your body didn't want to melt on the spot instantly. So very handsome with depthless brown eyes. Well, until he opened his braggard mouth. Then, you wanted to scream as much as you wanted to throw yourself at him.

Now, here you are. Your wedding night. Your marital bedroom. Your new husband. He perfunctorily ordered you to strip naked as he did the same. Your eyes bulge at the sight of him without clothing. Particularly an angry, large protuberance he referred to as his cock, which right now is branding your belly, leaving a sticky streak that, for some strange reason, you yearn to taste.

He steps away and rounds behind you, spanking a hand across your bottom cheek that makes you squeak, startled.

“Appealing shape. Good child-bearing hips,” Anthony assesses cooly.

You have to tamp down an urge to swing back and clock him in the jaw. The only reason you don't is the flood of pleasure in your limbic system as your bum tingles with his handprint, inner thighs now damp.

He circles back in front of you as you square your jaw and meet his scrutinising eye fiercely. You gasp loudly as a finger quests unexpectedly between your legs, into your damp curls and prods your body somewhere you have never been touched.

“A maiden, indeed, as promised.”

As he withdraws, you are as much afire as you are indignant.

“If I pass your grade…,” you sneer behind gritted teeth, “…I do suppose there is the matter of the marital act to get over and done with.”

“You know of it?” he looks surprised, but not unpleasantly so, a gravelly hitch in his voice.

“Somewhat,” you bluster, defensive. “I know it is my duty; it is necessary to create children, and I may not enjoy it.”

“True, true and not true,” he argues back. A warm hand shoots out suddenly to cup your breast, making you inhale sharply. “You will love it,” he swaggers.

And again, even as you press into the thumb swiping your nipple, your hatred for his conceit flares hot in your throat, indignation he can be so… just so… HIM.

But then he leans in and kisses you. An all-consuming invasion of your mouth and senses that leaves you breathless, plundered, besmirched, forever changed. And practically begging for more, having to bite the tongue he teased to stop yourself from voicing it.

As he pulls away, you see a brief maelstrom in his eyes, a flash of vulnerability, as if he is also taken aback, before he turns his expression flinty.

“Get on the bed and open your legs wide,” he orders curtly. “We shall indeed get this done. As much as you may hate me, and I dislike the circumstances.”

“Why dislike?” you ask, genuinely intrigued, even as you do as you are told, taking your place, lying with your legs out wide flat on the bedding.

“Not like that,” he sighs impatiently, tapping your feet upwards so your knees are bent. “And to answer your question, while I did not marry for love, I do wish for at least a degree of cordiality with my Viscountess,” he adds with a regret-filled sigh, clambering onto the bed.

“I can be cordial,” you counter as he climbs over you, that large cock bobbing as he does so, a lump in your throat at the sight.

He stills, and a smirk takes over his entire face.

“Prove it,” he challenges huskily, raising an eyebrow, your body ripening at his unanticipatedly playful tone.

“You are handsome,” you concede, trying your best not to show how flustered you are as he slowly presses his naked body into yours, bearing you down into the plush mattress. So much heat and warm skin, the soft dark hair on his chest teasing your puffy nipples.

“Go on…” he rumbles, a vibration in your ribcage as he does.

“I'm sure our children would be intelligent as well as beautiful,” you offer, giving your honest assessment.

“Would they now…” his voice is like dark velvet as his lips delicately trace your neck, then suck insistently on a spot that makes you stumble, a ripple of pleasure running down your limbs.

“A… And… And when you are not speaking, I actually think I could tolerate you,” you admit as his hot throat kisses cause a warmth spreading inside like a conflagration.

“I won't speak then,” he chuckles richly. “I will however…” there is a pause as he passes his cock over the apex of your thighs, and your mouth falls open in shock at a sharp, thrilling stab, “...make you scream my name.”

You stare up at the man hovering over you, completely enthralled by him—his power, his beauty, his mischief, and yes, his arrogance. A loop of desire and dislike as never-ending and strong as the shiny bands you both now wear on your fingers.

“Prove it,” your cutting, parroted response tumbles from your lips unbidden.

The passion and shock painted across his face make you melt inside like toffee—viscous and sweet.

“Oh, Viscountess, yesss,” he purrs sibilant. “That’s the spirit.”

He kisses you again, all breathtaking tongue and teeth, and this time, you push up into him, canting your body off the bed. He growls as you do, his touch turning edgier and rougher. Hands loop around your thighs and drag you down the bed.

“Any ache will be fleeting,” he assures, as butterfly wings beat under your ribs.

You gasp at a blunt pressure, followed by a twinge of pain. You are speechless as his cock slides into your body, your toes curling, your fingers wrapping around his flexing biceps as your insides stretch so wide to accommodate him. He stills, allowing you time to process the rush of stimuli, bussing a light kiss on your temple as you grapple with the fullness, entirely novel but not at all unpleasant. Then he begins to move slowly within you, a gentle rock of his hips as you whimper and grasp his arms tighter, needing an anchor.

“This is what you will enjoy every night,” he declares as he surges into you with a force that makes you pant and stare at him wide-eyed.

“Every night?! N-Not just one?!” you fight out, words garbled, overwhelmed, almost incapable of speech.

“No, no. We shall do this every night until you are with child,” his tone prideful and possessive; he leans down and bites your earlobe, his speech gusting humid over your cheek. “And even then, I dare say I shall not stop. You will be all the more irresistible when heavy with my child.”

He has flipped a secret switch buried deep in your belly, a magnetic pull calling for him like a siren song, wanting nothing more, as if it is your most significant purpose in life to bear his progeny.

“I… I want your children,” you stutter truthfully.

Your confession does something primal to him, hunching over you and taking you harsher now, hands grabbing your flesh hungrily as his cock ploughs into you. He moves quicker, the drag against that swollen nub between your legs making your lungs feel tight and your brain fuzzy. All the hatred draining from you, the scales tipping wholly towards the other side—total carnal lust. A craving for him and his body and to continue the Bridgerton name you now also bear.

Your hands tentatively explore his contours as you grow bolder, and he fucks you harder. His expression as he pulls up to look over you veering close to ragging affection.

“Do you like it?” he murmurs, a beautiful boyish smile claiming his face as you nod. “Do you want to do it more?” Again, you silently affirm. “Do you still hate me?” he whispers. You shake your head as he kisses your forehead. “Shame. You are so very beguiling when you fight me,” he confesses as if exposing a chink in his armour.

“I also did not say I liked you…” you quip, feeling emboldened, your cadence rising with each deep stroke he takes.

His inky pupils glitter down at you. “Indeed you did not,”

And with that, he sinfully sucks on two fingers, staring you down, worming them between your bodies. You cry out as he nudges your burning nub—so much wetness and heat. All the while, his pace never wavers.

“Pleasure is key to conception,” he explains, even as your brain turns off.

“Please don’t stop,” you pant, climbing higher and higher, nails scratching his back.

“I’m never stopping,” he rasps, his tone sincere.

He snaps his hips harshly, and all you can do is cling to him as your body flings you over a breathtaking peak, vision whiting out as your body shudders and your pussy flutters hard around his invading cock, which feels shatteringly huge with each convulsion. He groans, and as you feel yourself floating, he grabs your face and holds his directly over yours. His body stills, his face contorted in ecstasy as he also seems to reach a climax, a warm bloom deep inside you that can only be from him, from his cock. He slumps over you, both of you panting, winded.

“Now you have my seed, darling girl,” he slurs after a moment, the term of affection catching you slightly off-guard.

“Is that what I can feel?” You stumble, still dazed.

“Yes, you shall dutifully grow me a baby Bridgerton with it, will you not?” he looks at you expectantly.

“Yes, my lord,” you nod solemnly.

And you mean it.

No taglist as these drabbles are short

#kinktober 2023 #kinktober #anthony bridgerton fanfiction #anthony bridgerton #anthony bridgerton smut #anthony bridgerton imagine #bridgerton fanfiction #bridgerton #bridgerton smut #bridgerton imagine #anthony bridgerton x reader #anthony bridgerton x female reader #anthony bridgerton x you #anthony bridgerton x y/n #bridgerton x reader #bridgerton x female reader #bridgerton x you #bridgerton x y/n

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theredofoctober · 13 days

Text

MANNA- CHAPTER FOURTEEN: TRIPE

Dark!Hannibal Lecter x Reader x Dark!Will Graham AU fic

TW for eating disorders, noncon, abuse, drugging, Daddy kink, child abuse and more (check the tags)

Read after the cut

By some sense of duty, or else an undug tendril of guilt, Will volunteers himself to oversee your evening routine alone. You allow him this, being in scant possession of what slim tolerance has borne you through Hannibal’s accompaniment thus far.

Will proves himself to be far less involved than the other man would have been in his stead. He leans against a wall with the nonchalance of a prison warden as you shower blood and spend alike down the receiving drain, allows you to pad into your bedroom, towel-wrapped, to select a clean nightdress and sanitary products with his head turned nobly aside.

You cannot determine if his distance from you is through respect for your condition or some lasting dislike of you, neither of which holds entirely true.

More likely it is that he does not see you as his child, yet, nor quite with the equality of a lover.

Still, as you get into bed he cannot help but come to you, uncertain as he his of his purpose.

“Will you give me a goodnight kiss?” you ask, part in bitter jest, and part in annoyance with his indecision.

That a man can fuck and beat you in throes of black delight and still skulk about like a repentant sinner would have confounded you in the days before you became accustomed to such duality. To what end, and upon what strength the latter side subsists is now the greater puzzle, for it is this that drags its heels and restrains Will from his full devilry.

“Well?” you say, brusquely. “What are you waiting for? Dad’s permission?”

Will gives a hard laugh, one hand kneading the back of his neck.

“I admire your commitment to the part, but you don’t have to keep it up so seriously when it’s just you and me.”

“I promised I would,” you remind him. “Why can’t you? You had no issue kissing me in front of Hannibal. I don’t see why it’s a problem now.”

You see Will’s fingers go to the bridge of his nose, wanting the guard of the eyeglasses he’s neglected to wear.

“It’s not genuine,” he says, flatly. “The only reason you’re asking is to manipulate me.”

“So what?” you say. “Scared that it’ll work?”

“Not scared, no.”

“Sure you’re not.”

There is something hysterical in your tone, the cut string of a trapped and weary madness.

Will examines you, aware of the power play you’re attempting over him, intrigued by it, despite himself. Attracted, even.

His gaze is like a stone in the sun, all heat, all black, all blue.

He knows what revulsion you must push past to test him like this, still slightly high from the forced euphoria of fucking, and the drugs. You’re beyond consideration of the consequences, irrational, barely attached to the tongue and teeth that bite at the air in their ire.

Still Will hangs from your words like a pilgrim knelt before an oracle, dependent on your answer.

“Haven’t you had enough of me kissing you tonight?” he asks.

Sniffing, you turn to face his gargoyle shadow on the wall.

“So it’s a no. You’d make a really terrible father.”

“One...”

“Not my name.”

So Will says it, gently, and you roll back towards him, your heart quick and high behind a rail of bone with the thrill of his appeasement.

Your truce, the union of flesh: they’ve altered Will, for as he looks at you a second time his pupils are the chasms between worlds, wild and deep.

Kneeling up on the bed, you make a trellis of both hands through his curls and clutch him to you in an ungainly kiss. Will stumbles in the force of it, his arms spilling about your back so as not to fall upon you with all his weight.

You gasp against his lips with eagerness to take what he has taken, to fallow the rose flesh of his inner mouth, the lathe of your tongue churning. Will is too surprised to kiss you in return, but as you hitch one leg after the other upon his hips you feel the vine of him against your groin, wanting you again, as always.

You think of him fucking you now, pinning your wicked hands with the nail of his fist as he thrusts through a sheen of blood. Though you despise him still, your loins smart with interest in engineering the act rather than merely suffering it as ever before.

At last Will returns your kiss, but briefly, and with a knowing restraint before he lays you back upon the bed again.

You grasp at his face in an attempt to reclaim his lips. He pushes you lightly away.

“Hey,” he grins. “You made your point.”

“Oh?” you say, coolly. “And what is my point?”

“That I like kissing you. That I want to kiss you, whether Hannibal’s here or not.”

“Right,” you say, twisting a corner of your quilt around one finger for something to do with your hands. “But you never would have picked me. Like, if I was in one of your FBI classes. If I was your student. Would you even have noticed me?”

Will laughs again, with a startled unease, as though the notion is foreign to him.

“Starting affairs with students isn’t exactly my style. I turn up, I teach. That’s it. I don’t get personally involved. Or didn’t, till now. Letting people get close is... uncomfortable for me.”

He glances down at the bunch of quilt in your closed knuckles. Unlike the ever-tactile Dr Lecter, he makes no attempt to take it away.

“So how come you got so close to Hannibal?” you ask. “Didn’t you say you had reservations about him?”

“He saw me even when I was making an effort to turn away. He and I have commonalities I can’t ignore, and enough differences to keep me wondering who he really is. There’s a lot even I don’t know about him, and there are times I wonder what I’m doing letting him in.”

You’re on the verge of another question as Will steps sharply back from the bed.

“We can talk more tomorrow,” he says. “I’ll still be here in the morning. But if you want my thoughts about Hannibal then it’s only fair that you tell me a little about you in return. If this is going to work long-term I need to know who you are.”

Then he goes over to the light switch and closes you in behind a shutter of night.

You’re roused from the saccharine heat of your bedcovers the following morning by Will rapping on your bedroom door. His face appears in the crevice between it and the frame as though wary to trespass, the broken spell of your desperation in his eyes.

“It’s so early,” you whine, noting the bare line of sunlight beneath the curtains. “And I feel like death, thanks to you and Dad. Can’t I stay in bed?”

“Hannibal just rushed out to an emergency appointment,” says Will. “One of his patients is having some kind of crisis, so it’ll be just you and me for a while. You want coffee? I was about to make some.”

An apology, you think, something to alleviate the swaddled and perspiring misery of your comedown.

“Sure,” you say, weakly. “Black, please. Sweetener, if there is any. The low calorie version.”

Will’s brows rise.

“You think Hannibal keeps that around?”

Reflecting on the little paper sachets that had been favoured throughout high school you say, “Ha. I guess not.”

Within twenty minutes you’re sitting up against your pillows, one hand gripping a delicate, steaming cup, the other soothing your stomach through which bites the first monthly cramp.

Will takes a nearby chair, eyeing the bars on your window as though assuming your daily view through the glass.

Though you loathe him still in his unpredictable oddities, you’re keen to make closer yet the allyship you’ve struck up with him, watchful though he is of that very attempt. If he will not help you escape, then a friendship at least may fortify the sanity you fear will leave you in this quasi childhood.

Will doesn’t seek your regression quite as Hannibal does— a cantankerous teenager is as young as he perceives you, the sick girl that never grew up. This house, then, is a Neverland in reverse, a sumptuous den of brutal sex.

Closing your eyes against such thoughts, you take in your coffee, each dark mouthful a long-acquired taste. You remember forcing back cup after cup of it, trusting it over plain water in the belief that it would burn calories as you drank.

Suddenly you’re acutely nostalgic for the days spent in your childhood room, scrolling through online threads of ailing young women in a community of mutual suffering.

It occurs to you that you may never feel so entirely comprehended without judgement as you were there again. You understand Will rather more through the thought, his convergence with Hannibal a relief to so lonely a monster.

“Tell me about ‘Dad’,” you say, into the silence. “You said you would, last night. Like, who even is he? Where did he come from?”

Will blinks, stirred up from his own brooding thoughts. In the dreary daylight he has the face of a beautiful invalid, all its angles skirted in shade.

“Hannibal’s from Lithuania, originally,” he says. “He had a younger sister, Mischa. She died a long time ago. I don’t know the finer details of what happened to her. She’s the only family he’s ever talked about, and even then it’s been bare bones.”

You sit up straighter, envisioning a young girl with Hannibal’s eyes, and none of his appetite.

“Huh,” you say. “That makes a lot of sense.”

"Hannibal would disagree. He doesn’t put much stock in the past making him who he is.”

“Seems kind of a weird thing for a therapist to say. He’s always digging into mine.”

Will looks at the floor, as though distinguishing some new pattern from the grains in the carpet.

“Hannibal views himself as... separate from other people. Being that he acts outside of ethics and the law in his own profession, I’d guess that what’s between us isn’t his only secret.”

“I’ve tried to tell you,” you say, tapping your coffee cup with bitten fingertips for emphasis. “I’ve known this for so long. But since you’re going along with his games how can you even judge him for whatever horrible things he’s doing?”

“Without knowing what he has or hasn’t done,” says Will, slowly, “I can’t say that I do.”

He gets up from his seat and paces before the window, his hands gesticulating like pigeons frenzied into startled flight.

“You assume that what I’m trying to learn about Hannibal—the core of who he is—is something ugly. But that isn’t what I’m afraid of. It’s the possibility of him lying to me. I don’t know if I could forgive him for that after the bond we’ve made. After what he encouraged me start with you.”

“You shouldn’t trust him,” you say, urgently. “Don’t. You don’t need him.”

Scoffing, Will says, “Jack seems to think I do. Alana— she’s convinced I’m one nudge away from disappearing so far into a case that I kill someone without even knowing it. Hannibal's the only one that doesn’t think of me as broken.”

You consider informing him of his suspected encephalitis, that Hannibal surely withholds this truth and more so as to keep his favour.

In the end you retain your silence; better that Will discovers the manipulation alone and behold how he has been misled upon this trail of darkness.

“Enough about me,” says Will, abruptly. “I know that someone hurt you, long before Hannibal. Before me. Someone you've never forgotten.”

Alarmed by the twist in conversation, you stammer, “I— I already told him some of it. I said I didn’t remember. But I was lying about that. I just don’t know if it was only one, long night, or it happened other times. I don’t know which is worse.”

You pause, slightly breathless. Like a portent from the white lips of some phantom you know that you must tell Will the truth, adhere him to your weeping heart with empathy for you.

“I was just a little kid,” you say. “And he was an adult. Nearly family— I used to call him Uncle Lee. Hannibal probably told you that. Anyway, I got my ‘wrong’ feeling about him way before he did what he did. Like I knew it was coming. Then he came into my room alone one night and... it happened.”

You put down your coffee cup, almost knocking it from the bedside table with the shaking of your hand. Will comes away from the window at once, dragging his chair to your bedside to listen. He neither speaks nor looks into your eyes, aware that you can bear neither without faltering.

“He touched me,” you say, “and the whole time I couldn’t even face him. I don’t even remember what I felt. Maybe I didn’t feel anything at all. Just stared at the ceiling or whatever. He did stuff to me that changed me forever. I felt like a tiny old person in a kid’s body, after that, knowing about things I wasn’t supposed to know.

“And the worst of it was still having to see him after. My parents— I tried to tell them, but I couldn’t get the words out. They just thought I didn’t like him. So he came back to the house, now and then. Never saw any consequences.

“I’ve always wondered if I was the only one, or if there were others. He was a plumber, or something; he could have access to people’s daughters anytime he wanted. Just walk into their room and... you know. I think maybe he did do that, a couple of times. Who knows.”

Your restless fingers pick at the gold embroidery on your bedspread, working it loose from the velvet. One of Will’s hands folds over yours, gently holding them still.

“What I always think about is how he treated me, afterwards,” you say. “I tried avoiding him, but it didn’t always work. One day he cornered me at the top of the stairs— my parents were in the kitchen, so it was just me and him.

“I must have been maybe twelve or so. Not far off thirteen. My body was changing. I was growing up. He said, ‘you’re getting a little chubby, you know. You ought to do something about that before you look like your mother.’

“Then he smiled at me, and just walked into the bathroom like there was nothing wrong with what had just come out of his mouth, or what he’d done to me all those years ago.”

Inhaling an unsteady breath, you try, with dubious success, to smile.

“So now you get why I’m like this. And knowing it wasn’t my fault, that Leland Frost is just a predator... it doesn’t fix anything. Like, where do I go from there?”

“He injured you,” says Will, softly. “And it may never stop hurting. But you can recover. No matter what you believe, it is possible. His shallow cruelty is not your compass. You don’t have to live on the basis of an insult.”

Scowling, you pull away from Will, trapping your hands under your armpits.

“How can I change when I’m reliving what I went through every day? Why does Hannibal think this’ll heal me? Why do you? Oh, yeah. You don’t.”

“I want it to,” says Will.

You snort dismissively.

“Yeah, yeah. Not so long ago you would have punched the air to see the back of me. You don’t want to share Hannibal with anybody.”

Will leans back in his seat, arms folded; it takes a moment for you to register that he is, by some subconscious impulse, copying your posture.

“I’m not sharing Hannibal with you,” says Will. “I’m sharing you with him. And I want to do that. You knew it before I did.”

His gaze snaps to yours, more arresting than his hands on you had been.

“You’re more like me than I cared to admit. Hannibal was right about that. And though everything about you should repulse his sensibilities he finds you adorable. You clearly don’t appreciate it, but there it is.”

You yearn to deny him, to condemn this speech as sophistry, but you are silent, as much a congregant to him as he has been to you.

“Leland Frost tore you down because he saw that you were growing up and away from him,” says Will. “He knew that one day you’d have a life, and achievements, and people that really cared about you. He was going to fade out of your world, and he couldn’t stand not leaving a mark.”

“I just don’t get it,” you whisper. “He loved me. Why did he do it?”

Will shifts his chair even closer to the bed so as to lean into you, his expression tender, tragic, sombre with a father’s sympathy.

“Leland never loved you, and that’s no reflection on you or your worth. It makes him weak, that he could throw away the relationship he had with you over an urge.”

You don’t have the strength to rage against the whited sepulchre in Will, not when he speaks the truth you’ve always yearned to hear from another. Pain winds through your body, throat to gut, great, twisting pulses, as though eviscerated on a blade of past.

What advice would Will give for you to survive what he and Hannibal have done, and will do?

Nothing. Not a word. He knows that the structure of the home, even comfort from those that afflict you has changed you in so short a time. Your desperation to be gone from him he senses, too, and with it your lust to be loved.

Will holds your hand for a long time before he speaks again, on another subject quite as dreary as the last.

“When you said it’d been years since you...”

“Since I last had my period?” you ask, touching your stomach through the sheets. “Yeah. It has been.”

Your body, the betrayer, making a scarlet banner of your betterment through cruelty.

“I never wanted it to come back. Having it again means I’m not as sick anymore, and that’s like... messing up for me.”

Will's head tilts, his face carved up by the shadows thrown from your barred window into a lattice of snow.

“Failing to die is barely a failure at all,” he comments.

You shrug yourself further under your bedcovers.

“It is if what’s happening to you is something worse,”

“Is it always so bad, being here with us?”

Will’s hand rises. Doesn’t quite touch your face. You turn your head away, but not cruelly; he’s not a bad man, you decide, only contorted so utterly from the ways of his fellows that he is some creature other, or from before, the flint-armed hunter of the caves.

And like such a creature, he seeks your answering affection for want of some warmth in the dark beginning of the earth.

You allow him to kiss your forehead, clumsily, inclined towards him as though you were not both aware of the fiction that allows this contact.

He can only guess how far you’d run from this, had you your chance. How readily you’d betray him.

You’re much recovered by the time Dr Lecter returns, having been hydrated and energised by a selection of unnamed supplements Will had you take with lunch; there is a cure for every ailment in the makeshift laboratory of the kitchen, it seems.

Hannibal discovers you at your usual perch of the parlour couch, writing in your journal with a blanket tucked loosely around you against the October cool.

Will stands to greet his companion, setting aside a book you’d offered him from your shelf to peruse, its cover depicting the bloody half-brain of the sun on a desert horizon.

“I didn’t expect our charge to be in such high spirits,” says Hannibal, with unmasked surprise. “Thank you for caring for her this morning, Will. I’m aware that whatever time you can spare for us in the midst of an investigation is very precious.”

Likely aware of your eyes on him, Will says, “I’m glad I stayed. I appreciated the company. How’s the other patient?”

“Suitably quieted. I doubt that I’ll be called away again on her behalf. Still, I made the most of the journey home.”

Hannibal reaches into a shopping bag looped over one arm and produces from it a wrapped package of fresh meat, marbling the paper with blood.

Grimacing, you say, “Ew. What is that? Looks like an organ.”

“It is. I’ll be making trippa alla romana tonight. It’s an Italian dish made from cow stomach. Don’t turn your nose up till you’ve tried it. Have I served anything to you yet that you haven’t enjoyed?”

After dinner, all three of the household recline, full and talking lazily before the fire. Had your company been any other than your abusers you would almost be content, for having been allowed to leave the table after a valiant half plate you are not so guilt-soaked as you’d have been had you finished it all.

You had, in fact, disliked the meal, a first in Hannibal’s house. The thought of the organ, plucked from the rib of a butcher’s shelf, had struck bile to the back of your mouth from the first bite.

A cup of chocolate, warmed to a froth and unadorned with cream is set in your hands instead, which you drink in feline licks to make it last.

Will’s phone shrills abruptly in his pocket. Frowning, he glances at the lighted oblong of its screen and starts at a familiar name.

“It’s Jack,” he says. “I’d better take this.”

He promptly exits the room, speaking with clipped tones into the device.

Alone with Hannibal, you become acutely aware of him looking at you, not quite with suspicion, but not so far from that.

"I see that you and Will are becoming close,” he says, at last. “I’m glad to see it.”

Humming vaguely, you snatch up the journal again and weave your pen about in a pretence of writing.

Hannibal says, "Still, it saddens me that—for all your pretty words of promise—you display a lesser willingness to befriend me.”

You do not answer, pressing your pen so hard against a page that it blots through to the other side.

"Put your journal down a moment, Little One,” says Hannibal. “I’m speaking to you."

Without looking up, you answer, "I don't know what you want me to say."

"You needn't say anything at all. It's your behaviour I wish to change."

In a flounce of irritation you throw the journal upon the floor, its spine creasing.

“I do what you say, and I don't fight you anymore,” you say. “Isn't that daughterly enough?"

"For the purposes of your treatment,” says Hannibal, “it is not. You remain closed to me, parted only by narcotic aid. I'd prefer you to open to me of your own volition. With Will, you prove yourself increasingly capable of that.

“I’ve given you all you’ve asked for, and more, and yet you show little gratitude. I wouldn’t wish to remove these luxuries for you to appreciate my endeavours.”

You look at him, then, this man both jealous and performing jealousy to groom you into his concubine, and in looking see that he will deconstruct your room into the barest cell, should he not have his way.

"I do appreciate what you’ve given me," you hastily protest. "I do, Daddy. You don’t have to take anything away. But I— I just don’t know you the way I know Will.”

“But you do,” says Hannibal, rising to sit beside you, a dangerous proximity. “That’s why you are so afraid of me, is it not?”

You begin to object, trailing off at the sound of approaching footfalls as the younger of your captors returns, listing in the churning swell of stress.

“It's the investigation,” says Will. “Another doll’s been found. Savannah Belmont. It’s too soon to be the Lover’s kill. He has a cool off point between each abduction.”

Hannibal straightens in his seat, rapidly alert.

“A copycat, then.”

Will nods, his throat tightening. His eyes touch your face briefly, and you offer him a small, close-lipped smile, an extension of comfort from across the room. His shoulders drop from their rigid line, and when he speaks again the frantic note in his voice is tempered slightly.

“Definitely a copycat,” he says. “The Lover disposes of the dolls by throwing them into rivers like garbage. No attempt to lay them to rest. Savannah was put on display, placed in a chair on a dirt bank as though she was waiting to be found.

“Both killers meant to degrade their victims, but only the copycat’s is implied to understand and accept that humiliation. Savannah Belmont died aware of her inferiority in the eyes of her murderer.”

You find yourself sitting on your hands to prevent them from betraying your agitation with their unsteadiness. Your leg, however, you cannot control, the right foot gyring an inch above the floor.

Hannibal eyes it without speaking, folding your reaction into the lengthy tome of his mind.

“The victim’s stomach was missing,” says Will, turning to pluck a bottle of whiskey from a nearby cabinet like some bronze fruit. “That’s new. The Lover’s mutilations are all with the purpose of fitting the bodies of his victims inside their silicone casings. He has no surgical skills.

“This new killer obviously has expertise. Savannah’s stomach was cut precisely from her body with the clear intent of taking it as a trophy.”

“Her stomach?” you repeat.

You feel the heaviness of meat within you and are chilled by the coincidence.

Hannibal could not have known what the copycat would take to reference it, could not have known of his existence to begin with, and yet as you glance at him under your lashes you don’t quite trust the seriousness of his expression, his eyes gleaming dimly as tarmac in the rain.

“You mustn’t worry, Little One,” says Hannibal, turning to lift you up onto his lap. “The Lover can’t hurt you. We will protect you, always.”

He settles your head against his chest, which resounds with the slow beat of his heart and the machinery of organs digesting his own rich meal.

The monster knows of your renewed distrust and is unthreatened by it, declawed and tooth-filed as you are by his influence over you and all the passageways of the world you’d otherwise cross in your escape.

“Thank you for taking care of me, Daddy,” you mutter, against his shirt, and the warmth of Hannibal’s palm cups your buttocks with a tormenting friction, both threat and tease at once.

While you hate him—are in terror of him, always—your form is increasingly enamoured by his touch as though it knows that it must be so, or die.

“No need to thank me for performing my duty to you, Little One,” says Hannibal, into your ear. “For you belong to me, and to Will, and you must never forget it.”

#manna fic #hannibal fic #tw noncon #tw csa #tw abuse #tw drugs #tw captivity #dead dove do not eat #hannibal lecter x reader #will graham x reader #hannibal lecter x reader x will graham #darkfic

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infamous-if · 1 year

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what's something the ROs dislike about themselves the most & what's something they really like about themselves?

This was in Seven’s drabble but they hate how deeply they feel/how invested they get. They're aware they fall too deep too quickly but can't help themself. Seven has always sought out love in others due to the lack of love they have for themself. Something they really like? I feel like Seven is kind of aware how well they charm people and they like it haha they also know that not a lot of people can pull off the raggedy, messy look and sev does it well.

Victoria dislikes how she much she feels like she has to save others, even when it's hurting her. She can never just turn the blind eye. I do think there is a twisted level of satisfaction that Vic also gets when she sees that someone is bettering themselves because of her, but she knows it'll eventually blow up in her face. As for likes: how good of a friend she is. She also likes her looks.

Orion doesn't like how he's never good enough. womp womp. His inner-voice is kind of a dick. What he likes? His body...he put a lot of work to be that toned. Also his work ethic.

August doesn't like how easily swayed they are. They try to have agency but they then start to fear hurting others, or ruining the good things others have so they allow the bad things in their life to persist. August likes to act like they don't care, and they don't for many things, buttt they're human at the end of the day. What they like? Their sense of style. Also their ability to remain calm in situations.

G dislikes how they can tell they're hurting someone but they can't stop. G tries to be better person, but they always end up spiraling and making mistakes away. G can't help but fall into old habits. Also, how much of a voiceless child they act when around their family. What they like? Their talent and their looks.

Sebastian hates how non-confrontational he is and he can be a bit of a doormat. He's not good at speaking for himself against people who may be at a higher position as him or who even have an ounce of power. As for what he likes, he likes to think he's a good father. Or at least he tries to be.

These are pretty relevant to their routes so consider this a hint??

#infamous cast #inbox

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madame-fear · 6 months

Text

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐏𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐅 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄

[ 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟏𝟎 | 𝐁𝐋𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐒𝐖𝐀𝐍 ]

★ amira speaks! : beforehand i apologise for the sensitive content/topics in this chapter, i only added it for the angst of the plot. feel free to ignore this chapter if you dislike this type of content. — summary : [ — ✧ request ] — word count : 6.0k

— pairing : lucerys velaryon x betrothed!reader — genre : initial angst at Jace’s unrequited love, maybe. in general terms, fluff. this chapter mostly contains angst.

ೃ⁀➷ check the TPOL masterlist!

TW | mentions of near death, birth, blood, miscarriage(s), self-deprecation.

“Just a few more pushes,”

A helpless groan escaped from you. Several strands of your already sweaty hair covered your face, swaying very slightly as you heavily panted against them. Your trembling hand was held by Rhaenyra rather tightly, while her other hand soothingly brushed the bits of hair that covered your eyes, caressing your head as well. Towels tinted in your own blood were all across the bed where you were giving birth to your firstborn, and the tension in the atmosphere worsened with the passing of seconds.

Childbirth could be rather difficult and dangerous, too, and she like no other understood the situation you were in. The situation wasn’t any easier considering it was unknown whether Lucerys had survived Storm’s End or not, with her being his dearing mother, and you being his treasured, closest friend. “I-I can’t do this—” you panted out, a desperate look covered your expression, as you craned your head to stare at Rhaenyra in a feeble manner. She shook her head, “You can do this, sweet girl. We’re here for you.” she reassured, cooing. Jace, much like Rhaenyra, held the back of your head, stroking it with the tip of his thumb to offer you some comfort, feeling nervous and preoccupied himself as well for your safety.

The young maidens that aided you during the birth of your child seemed rather nervous, noticing how grimly in pain you seemed. A breathless groan escaped from you, as the pants became more huffed with the passing of the seconds. A rather intense cramping pain struck you in the abdomen, even being felt in the lower stomach; it felt as if all of your organs were pressured and being squeezed right out of you. Clenching your jaw, a growl escaped deeply from your throat as you began trying to push harder.

You felt as if you could pass out right there from the way your head spun around dizzily, at any moment. The blood loss you suffered was exaggerated, and concerning. The bedsheets below you had turned into a harrowing dark shade of red for those surrounding you. One of the maidens was positioned between your legs, to which your inner thighs had some dried drops of your blood, and she raised her sight towards Rhaenyra. “I can see the head of the babe already, your Grace.” she remarked, as Rhaenyra gave her a single nod with her head, sheepishly grinning before turning back to you.

“The babe is almost out, you can do it.” she kept reassuring. But there was something that felt off. Perhaps it was your intuition that sensed something was not right, perhaps it was the built-up stress taking an extreme toll on your body, or even… It was the thought of what could’ve happened with the young Velaryon Prince in Storm’s End, that still roamed subconsciously in your mind, eating every last remaining bit of your mental stability in a heinous manner. Every time you reminded yourself of the current situation the cramping pain kicked harder, making you try to hold back a few screams of dread, but miserably failing.

A tear appeared at the corner of your eye, threatening to fall at any given chance as you let your head drop dead against the pillow, shaking your head desperately. “No, no…” you mumbled out, feeling the tear run across your cheek, leaving a hot trail behind. The pain was nearly unbearable, you could barely hold yourself anymore. The platinum haired woman raised your hand to her lips, softly pressing a lip against your knuckles as she caressed your skin with the tip of her thumb. “I know how it feels, my love,” she spoke in a hushed tone, that as well indicated worry behind of it, noticing the amount of blood you lost. She tried to cling to the last bits of hope she had inside of her, but she knew what that could possibly mean. And it was grisly to even allow that thought to slip inside her mind.

Rhaenyra didn’t wish for you to endure the pain she went through, when she suffered a miscarriage with Visenya.

“But the babe is almost out, you have to do this.” the baby that was half his, or her way out from your insides felt like a heavy weight, as if the child didn’t seem to do it’s own efforts to come out from you. A sigh escaped from you, as your quivering arms propped your body slightly by the elbows to adjust your position. Your hand tightened it’s grip to that of Rhaenyra’s, and you once again tried using all the last remains of strength you had to force the baby out of you.

In a swift movement, the door of your private quarters was opened in a haste. A maiden rushed inside, approaching Rhaenyra. You were too distraught pushing your baby out to even care, but the Targaryen princess raised her sight with furrowed eyebrows to stare at the maiden, whom had leaned her body closer to Rhaenyra’s, whispering in her ear.

“A small dragon has been seen approaching Dragonstone, your Grace. It might be Prince Lucerys,”

Those words of her were barely distuinguishable to you, feeling drowsy enough as you felt the babe’s heavy weight leisurely coming out of you, along the slick liquids of your placenta. Her blue eyes widened very slightly at the words of the young maiden, staring at her with a look of both disbelief, and relief. The maiden, without saying another word, rushed back outside of your private quarters, discreetly working as someone who passed the news to the Queen while she was focused on helping you with your birth; with the birth of the future heir to the Iron Throne.

“Half body out, my Princess.” the maiden informed, with a keen smile appearing on the corner of her lips as she encouraged you to keep pushing. Rhaenyra warmly, and vey slightly smiled to you at the news. There was barely any strength out of you, but biting your lower lip desperately, you picked all the force that was left inside of you, and used it to push the babe out of you with some more pushes.

At one point, gritting your teeth through the pain, you felt the child easily sliding out of your body. A cry escaped rather loudly from you, even if your jaw was tightly clenched to drown back the noises spurring from youe lips, feeling the heavy weight pressuring your lowest zones one more time, before feeling relief at having it all come out at once.

As the child slipped out from you, you mindlessly threw your head back, physically and mentally exhausted. One of the maids assisting you rapidly took hold of your babe, as another girl helped her wrap the child. Rhaenyra looked down at you, warmly leaning closer to press a tender kiss on your sweaty forehead, and Jace rapidly stood up from his seat to meet the child. “I’m proud of you.” Rhaenyra whispered, brushing aside the strands of hair that covered your face, as you remained with your eyes closed.

One of the young maids that carried the already wrapped up babe in her arms remained with her stare fixed on the child. Your eyes slowly opened again, barely beig able to move from all the physical activity. Her expressions turned into a joyful one, but leisurely became grim, with her sheepish smile drooping down in a dreadful manner. It wasn’t until then, that you realised something was terribly wrong. And so did the rest of the people inside your chambers.

“P-Prince, Princess, your boy…” she gulped nervously, as the eldest Velaryon Prince stood by her side. A sensation of anxiety arose on him with the passing of seconds at the realisation that the child, your little boy, wasn’t crying, nor doing any sound even if the young girl rocked him gently in her arms. Jace, delicately but hastily, took the child on his arms.

The child was quiet, still. The chambers felt horribly dreadful as your chest rose and descended continously, awaiting for the young maiden to continue speaking, or for Jace to at least murmur a word. The young maiden’s face began being covered by great anguish, as Jace stood still staring at the boy you had together in disbelief, quietly grieving.

As Jacaerys held the small babe in his arms, one of his hands went to the back of his head, raising him to his face, and placing his lips on the child’s forehead in a mournful manner. Rhaenyra could only feel the disappointment, and sorrowness that would begin to loom over you at the tension lurking the ambience, amidst the dead silence.

“(y/n)…” the eldest Velaryon muttered, carefully sitting by your side. Weakly, you rapidly sat on the bed, groaning a bit in the process as a stinging pain hit in your lower stomach. It couldn’t be. The way you stared at him, screamed that you were losing every bit of hope to see your newborn baby boy healthy and well. His heart ached at the sight of harrowing desperation in your face, as well as Rhaenyra knew you wouldn’t be easily comforted out of this.

“No,” you whispered, nearly abruptly taking the babe away from Jace’s arms, carrying him yourself. “It… It can’t… It can’t be—” your words were stuttered, coming nearly choked out. A lump began tightening your throat, as you felt a rising of savage emotions all coming to attack you at once. Cradling the newborn baby smoothly, your trembling fingers weakly moved aside part of the blanket wrapped around his body that covered his beauteous little face.

Gods, it seemed as if he was merely sleeping peacefully; undisturbed. Your chin began quivering, as the water forming in your eyes became tears, violently beginning to escape from your eyes as you sobbed. Tightly pressing the child against your chest, with your hand pressing the back of his head tightly against the crook of your neck, you allowed yourself to cry everything you had contained.

“I’m… Very sorry.” jace muttered, feeling the sorrow himself as that little dead baby was his child as well. Without doubting it a second, his arm was wrapped around your waist and pressed you against him, embracing you warmly to offer some comfort. Rhaenyra reached to place herseld by your side and smother you in her usual motherly love, but the same maiden that informed her of the dragon approaching Dragonstone from afar entered the room again.

“Your Grace, Prince Lucerys and his dragon have returned severely injured. He was asking for (y/n) before he had to be taken to his chambers by the maesters due to his open wounds.” the whisper was supposed, again, only for Rhaenyra to hear, but you did manage to properly listen what she said. The Targaryen Queen looked at you one more time with a long sigh before standing up from her seat, “I will be back soon, my love.” she whispered, caressing your back before leaving behind with the maid that informed her of the news.

Either way, the burden sitting heavily on your chest was more than enough for you to ignore all the things surrounding you. The tears escaped from your eyes, leaving their hot trails on your rosy cheeks. The poisonous feeling of ponderous emptiness rooted inside you haltingly with the passing of time. Nothing surrounding you mattered anymore. You felt frail, impotent — not only physically, but it was mentally degrading as well for your wellbeing.

“I-I’m sorry…” you muttered, in between helpless, desperate sobs. The tears ran freely across your face, falling down to the ivory blanket your dead child was wrapped around, leaving little dark spots of dried tears. “I-I failed you. I failed my own child… I-I failed everyone,” your lips quivered violently. Your already feeble arms trembled as you tightly held your child against your chest, rocking your body.

Jace looked at you sorrowfully, trying to contain the own sadness he felt at the moment. He shook his head softly, brushing aside a strand of your hair. “No, don’t say that. You never failed any of us,” he reassured, embracing you tightly, allowing your own head to heavily rest on his shoulder. The eldest of the Princes felt a bit of uneasy on how to properly comfort you, as words never felt enough. “You are a great and dutiful wife, as well as a mother. We all cherish you very dearly, like no other.”

His lips were pressed gently against your head, trying to coo you. Your eyes were tightly shut, carelessly allowing sweaty strands of your hair to cover your features. The dreadful pain — in every way — made you feel tremendously exhausted, but all the tears you hid for quite some time were finally freed. In response to his words, you shook your head.

“No,” you whispered, with a hitched breathing. You sniffed quietly, “I am no proper mother, Jacaerys.” weakly, you raised your sight to him. Continously, the tears falled from your eyes, moistening your own clothes, and that of Jace’s. But that couldn’t matter any less, at the moment. His coffee coloured eyes attentively focused on you, pitying the state you were in.

“T-The Seven,” you blurted, stuttering. “They have cursed me to suffer this pain. And I wish I wouldn’t have to endure it.”

Of course, he never thought this was a cursed brought by the Seven themselves. Perhaps a misfortune, yes, but only because the context of war was stressing enough to also add the near death of your best friend, his younger brother. Fortunately, the young future Lord had returned, harmed but alive, but there was no going back to what happened. Your child was born too early, and in a bad situation.

For now, all he could do was give you your time and space to let the pain naturally flow away. Offering you his support and care as you both lost the newborn boy, and the next heir you shared in common, but with no pressure to you.

Time passed dreadfully slow. The hooting of the owls was hushedly heard from the outside of your window, as well as the chirping of the crickets.

All the tears that had fallen from your eyes were dried. There were no more of them to let escape, but you felt as if you needed to cry even more. Your eyes felt heavy, as if they could droop down at any given time, but you had no need to rest at all.

The funeral of your dead newborn child wouls be held early in the morrow, and you already dreaded the thought of having to witness it. Everyone that previously assisted you with your birth had offered their comfort to you, but after some time, you decided you wished to be alone. And knowing the pain, they allowed you to carry your cold babe in your arms, cradling his body disappointedly.

Lucerys had to forcefully rest after the maesters helped taking care of his severe wounds, and had been informed of your miscarriage the second the young Prince woke from his short, interrupted sleep. Of course, Luke had insisted on standing up in anyway he could, and visiting you — but as you wished to be alone and he was gravely injured, no one allowed him to get out of his private quarters.

Truth was, you craved to have Lucerys by your side comforting you after the miscarriage you suffered. And he did as well.

While everyone rested in a deep slumber, the young Velaryon Prince stood from his bed. A wooden cane was given to Lucerys in case he needed to stand up for anything, and he took hold of it as he surreptitiously made his way out from his chambers; but not without having to drown back some growls in pain at how every single cut painfully stinged him.

Quietly shutting the door behind of him, he used his cane to walk on the dimly lit halls of Dragonstone to guide himself towards your chambers, which fortunately it was only a few minutes away.

As you gently cradled your body grimly with youe cold child in your arms, with notorious dark bags under your eyes and a slight redness from all the tearing, a soft knock was heard from the door of your chambers. Having been involved in your own thoughts — and blankly staring, simultaneously — the knock made you quietly yelp, jumping very slightly. Your heartbeat increased rapidly, as you gulped anxiously.

You felt too weak to even respond. “M-May I come in?” the gentle, feeble voice was from no other than Lucerys himself. Even if you felt relieved to know he had taken all the effort to visit you, a few seconds of silence loomed before you finally answered. The pounding from your heartbeat leisurely went back to normal. “Y-You may.” you finally answered, with a hoarse voice.

For some reason, it felt strange to hear your own voice after hours of locking yourself own chambers. The mere sound of your fragile voice shattered his heart.

Discreetly, Luke entered your room, rapidly shutting the door as he entered. You lifted your sight to stare at him, with a dispirited expression in your face. Not only your heart was already shattered for having gone through the painful miscarriage of your firstborn, but as well seeing his arms covered in bandages, noticing several cuts on his face with some dried blood and him walking on a cane slowly already worsened your state.

Lucerys stopped right in front of your bed, his green eyes observing the amount of blood your sheets were covered in, along some towels tossed around your chambers that were tinted in dark red. The sight was harrowing enough, and it became more horrid the moment he saw you still holding your baby boy in your arms, looking absolutely shattered. Your hair was messy, and your face was had slight puffy eyes from all the crying, reddish in your lower lids.

“Baelon didn’t make it, Luke.” your voice was enervated, breaking as you spoke very slightly. A long sigh escaped his lips, continuing to walk towards you. Your eyes were watery once again, as you looked down at your babe. “(y/n)…” he muttered, groaning hushedly as he sat by the edge of your bed, but by your side. His cane rested against the nightstand table next to your bed. “I wish I could have been there for you. I’m sorry.”

Tenderly, his hand was placed on your cheek. With his thumb, he wiped away a tear that began rolling across your cheek again, caressing your skin very softly. “A-And I wish I could have been there for you, too…” you retorted, swiftly licking your already dried lower lip. “Jace insists I could never fail him on my duty to provide him with an heir, but…” your breathing was sharpened, trying to inhale some fresh air to avoid falling into the downward spiral of releasing all the sorrow you contained.

“I did fail him. I failed all of you. I wish I could have taken more care of myself to protect my child,” your words brought grief to himself, with a desperate rising feeling in his chest to hold you against him and shower you in all the adoration Luke had. The young Velaryon noticed immediatly the way the tip of your quivering fingers caressed the cheek of your little boy.

“Look at me, (y/n). Come here,” curiously, you raised your sight towards him.

With a weak, yet smooth movement, the young Velaryon prince gently wrapped his arms around your waist. His hands tightly pulled you against his body while his green eyes fluttered shut, as you rested your head against his chest and kept cradling your child in your arms, inhaling his scent deeply as if his warmth were the only thing capable of keeping you less miserable.

The tears strolled through your eyes in a leisure manner. It was as if a burning burden sat tightly against your chest, weighing profoundly. In a way, you felt reassured to know that despite how gravely wounded he was from Dragonstone, he was still alive. But other part of you, felt entirely useless, and if something had been brutally ripped apart from you.

“I promise, we will forever cherish that child.” you would forever remember the heir that could never be, and even if you felt helplessly useless, you found comfort in Lucerys – as your own beacon of security.

“And I will stay by your side in the morrow, during the funeral.” he placed a tender kiss on top of your head, then resting his chin on it. The young Prince rocked your body to the sides very tenderly and slightly, sighing softly. Something in him realised how much of a good, loving mother you were. In a way, you reminded him of his own.

For a moment, during Storm’s End, he was afraid he would never get to feel that sweet warmth of yours, or to ever stay by your side to comfort you if you needed to. But part of that weight was released when Luke returned safe from home, and even if he was as severely wounded as he was, he would never not take care of you.

This was far away from being the end to you, even if it seemed like nothing could be as better and simple as it used to be.

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#tpol #the power of love #lucerys velaryon x reader #hotd x reader #hotd fic #house of the dragon fanfiction #house of the dragon x reader #lucerys velaryon x you #hotd x you #hotd imagine #hotd x y/n #house of the dragon imagine

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rouf-4 · 1 year

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South Node and how we detached from our partners: Synastry Edition part 2

Ok, I have to say that even though SN is a really karmic point in our chart, I recently found out that all that theory of reincarnation and past life is something really recent (apparently) and in old vendic astrology they consider North Node and South Node shadow planets, I don't necessarily dismiss the reincarnation and past karma theory, but in my little research I found interesting how they see this shadow planets like a challenging energy (malefics), for North Node is mainly known for its obsessive, tricky and materialistic characteristics (due to its lack of a physical body) and the South Node is known for it's detachment, elusive and introspective characteristics (due to the lack of a head).

Accordingly to what I already explained, I notice that it makes a lot of sense to see their effect in that area of our chart, and in the area of others chart (synastry), I notice something that change a lot in old vendic astrology is that they don't try to make people erase their SN, instead they encourage people to learn both lesson (Rahu and Ketu) and also Ketu, even with it's malefic energy, is really prominent in charts of great astrologers.

With that in mind, we can say Ketu make us detached from all the material word and the tangible, so it's effects force an introspection (the kind of introspection is going to be dictated by the sign Ketu is in) that is going to take away our physical sense in the area of our life, example: if you have Ketu in cancer in the 5th house, your going to have an emotional introspection that make you detached to your children, your creative project, your childhood or your inner child, this is to gain a sense of reflection and individualism (a head) in that area of our life.

Now we will see how ketu detachment can manifest in synastry depending of the axis it touch:

Their/ your ketu in the 7th house: This is twin flames placement for sure, Ketu person probably find a lot in common with the house person (Rahu in the 1st house), this can be great, but also can bring a lot of jealousy into the interaction, Ketu person may feel lacking in front of house person, and this could turn an instant click into a passive aggressive approach to the other, ketu person is unable to not notice house person, but they'll try to dismiss any potential relationships they could have with house person; that's when Ketu person may start to mimic house person behavior (trying to get a reaction), but then dismissing house person likeability or attractiveness, ketu person motivated by their own insecurities (Rahu in the 1st house) will denied any interest they may feel in the other person. I studied a case where Ketu person actively did stuff to provoke the house person, but then just acted like house person was crazy when confronted, honestly this placement can bring a lot of gaslighting if not develop.

Their/ your Ketu in the 8th house: Stalker tendencies can come with this placement, specially the house person can feel a lot of intrigue for the Ketu person. House person feel extreme dislike for Ketu person, but somehow they still obsess with what Ketu person do, may even extort Ketu person cause they feel a need to control Ketu person dangerous side; also Ketu person may feel entitled of house person possessions, so it's not unusual seeing this in s*x workers who trick guys, or guys (house person) who wants to dominate s*x workers (Ketu person). Ketu person may wants house person money and nothing else (Rahu in the 2nd house), and may refuse any intimate request make by the house person, this can make the house person aggressively pursue Ketu person and try to control financially what they do or don't do. Ketu person may feel disrespected emotionally by house person intense approach. I've seen this in criminal-victim dynamics, and some of them ended violently.

Their/ your Ketu in the 9th house: like with any Ketu placements, there's always going to be some difficulties, but actually Ketu in the 9th house tend to be a good placement in synastry, cause even when they see their big picture or future quite different, they relate deep mentally, so it's not uncommon to see Ketu person being that friend who left town, but still keeping up with their old friend, cause they feel deeply understood by house person. Long-lasting conversations are the norm for these people, they tend to get along so well that even the smallest details can get into a endless talk, they may know so well what the other is thinking, but struggles to get what the other wants for the future (communication is the key, and they already have it), also can be hard for cultural exchange cause Ketu person may feel apathy for the house person tradition, religion and patriotism, even though I seem people with this synastry that get married, cause even when they don't get along in future plans, they feel more connected to Ketu person (Rahu in the 3rd house) than they feel attached to their traditions (strong Mercury or 3rd house people). Any way Ketu energy is actually really familiar with 9th house energy, so even with this apathy, these people can find a meaningful connection through detachment.

Their/ your Ketu in the 10th house: This is 50's ladies coming back home and letting their husbands work to provide them, I mean not always, but this is a really intimate and obsessive relationships, Ketu person doesn't care about house person place in the world, but their place in their heart and life (Rahu in the 4th house), house person may feel intended to be with Ketu person cause they see who they indeed are. Ketu person could want to start a family, and want house person to compromise early in the relationship, this could manifest like those inseparable partners; the huge level of codependency with this placement is scary, and even though these natives can have a kinda private and reclusive relationships, most people could not notice house person interest in Ketu person, or house person could actively seek to dismiss their feeling for Ketu person when they are in public. Ketu person may feel apathy for public reactions to their relationship, and totally disregard house person feeling, they couldn't care less about high aspirations house person may have, they could threathen house person into giving up their dreams and stay at home. House person may feel ashamed of ketu person, or just feeling vulnerable to what people can think about them.

Their/ your Ketu in the 11th house: This is quite similar to Ketu in 9th house, Ketu person doesn't fit house person ideals, but somehow, there's a spark between these two that intoxicated them (Rahu in the 5th house), house person could feel ketu person can't get what they're planning, but, at the same time, Ketu person scenically recognize their authentic self. Ketu person may find house person dream way too fanciful and unpractical, but, they just can help, but feel revitalize when they are around house person. Collective practices and efforts done by the house person, will be seen as annoying cause this would keep house person away from Ketu person. Ketu person is unsupportive and pessimistic with house person dreams and idealistic views, but at the same time this would bring some realistic perspective into the relationship and its projects. If house person lack 11th house energy, this couple can turn self-centered and loose contact with others realities, but if house person resonates way too much with 11th house energy this could make them feel divided between love (Rahu in the 5th house) and social obligation (Ketu in the 11th house); generally their personal desires end up winning, and this relationship is intense and passionate, but, hardly long-lasted.

Their/ your Ketu in the 12th house: I call this the magical feeling you loose to find the realness in daily life with other, as everything with Ketu, we always have to detached from something in other to get something else, that's how House person could feel that what they have to left is too much; with Ketu person there's no sparkly eyes, castles or white horses, there's just a comfortable company and a helpful disposition, they both find the other ordinary, but, that's exactly what drive them crazy about the other, the typical couple that didn't know what they found attractive about the other, House person just can scape Ketu person company, and actually they don't want to (Rahu in the 6th house). House person is going to find a sense of productiveness in there every day life when they are with Ketu person; any frustration, sadness or sorrow will be notice by Ketu person, meanwhile any victimization or delusional behavior will be shut down or dismissed by ketu person indiference. If there's an strong Neptune, 12th house or pisces, house person will be obligated to be realistic when they are with Ketu person, if otherwise ketu person could mean a deep cut with esoteric forces in the house person life, this could leave to really long lasting relationship, cause they will feel drawn to be together.

...

Disclaimer: This interpretation can change according to other synastry aspects, example: if you have sn in someone 3rd house, if can change if mercury is trine Jupiter, cause Jupiter is going to expand communication in a harmonious way (trine).

Note: Well that was it, I did enjoy to deep a little into these aspects, honestly something I just found out recently, but I didn't write last time, it's that Ketu doesn't just detached us from our partners, but also make themselves detached from something in order to be with us; ex: if someone has your Ketu in their 4th house, they will feel your detached in that area, but also as long as they keep you in their lives, they will detached themselves from that area. Ketu and Rahu are what we detached from, in order to get something else, balance is required in this process, cause, one can loose in Rahu excessiveness, or in Ketu apathy. Any way if you want me to deep a little more on Rahu leave a comment ✌️

Do not copy pls

#astrology #astrologypost #astro community #horoscope #zodic signs #Ketu #south node #rahu #north node #ketu in the 7th #ketu in the 8th #ketu in the 9th #ketu in the 10th #ketu in the 11th #ketu in the 12th #synastry

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rurikkirur · 9 days

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Drarry/HP headcanons - Pt2

Today I'm going to talk about a headcannon of mine that is a bit different from the most common representations I see in the fandom, and I'll try to explain why I think it would make sense! I got some questions about this in the comments of my fic (DMATAC), so I'll leave my full view on this matter here!

Headcanon #2 - Draco and Harry's relationship with food/cooking It is common to see two scenarios in the fandom: Harry loving to cook and Draco being clueless in the kitchen, or Harry developing an eating disorder (I haven't read fics like this, but I know they're out there). And for me it would be neither of those options... I do believe that Harry would not have a very healty relationship with food/cooking after what he went through at the Dursleys, so Harry loving to cook never really made 100% sense to me. It's not something that bothers me, but I just thought it could have developed the other way around. But I wouldn't go as far as developing an eating disorder mostly because of Molly Weasley, and the role she played in Harry's life. Harry was underfed, and sometimes forced to cook in order to eat, so that's something that leaves emotional scars. But the Weasleys and Hogwarts changed this for Harry to some degree, and I think it could have made Harry actually like to be given food, instead of preparing it himself. He would see it as an act of love and care for him, that would fulfill a need of his 'inner child'. So I believe Harry would dislike cooking, but he would love to eat, and be given food. I like to believe that in his daily life he would mostly eat take-out food from restaurants, and in general he would melt down for anyone that cooked for him. As for Draco, he grew up in the oposite situation and not once in his life he needed to cook, and always had food served to him, as a regular pureblood/rich child. So he would naturally develop into some spoiled 'picky eater', that would always complain about food that was given to him. But I believe this would change after the war. Draco would be broken and emotionally scared after all he went through, so discovering himself capable of small achievements in 'lesser' and 'simpler' activies, such as cooking a dish that he liked, and managing to get the taste that he wanted, and that pleased his picky palate, would give him a sense of satisfaction that could develop into a love for cooking something 'perfect', for his own standards. I like to stand by the idea that Draco is good at potions, and cooking is somehow similar, so Draco could develop great cooking skills. After having his beliefs challenged during the war, Draco might try to cook even as an act of 'rebellion' that would go against who he used to be. Now, you can see how this can work out perfectly for Drarry in a post-war scenario, right? 🤭😏😌 That's my version of their relationship with food/cooking, and the reason why I wrote them like that! 😝

#drarry #drarry headcanon #harry x draco #fanfic #hpdm #draco and harry #draco x harry

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meadowmusing · 3 months

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my thoughts before the PJO finale

overall? A good fun show but with some definite stumbling. Faithful in a "remake" sense, but as much as a "port" would be. Still a genuinely good time with a likeable cast, gorgeous visuals, and an engaging (mostly) interesting plot.

Beware spoilers for ep1-7!

My biggest gripes

Pacing. the first episode was horribly paced. Somehow both rushed, not well condensed, and yet also failed to effectively deliver tension in important scenes it was needed in. Scenes like the minotaur felt dragged out and lacked the urgency it deserved, and the fight/victory fell kind of flat. Pacing got better in later episodes thankfully.

Sally Jackson. Yeah I know, not a hot take. She's a more realistic depiction of a mother in that kind of situation but I didn't find her likeable outside of her first scene talking about the name Perseus. She's not necessarily a "Bad Character" per se, but she is not the Sally Jackson from the books. Frankly, I didn't find book Sally all that important, but seeing this version has definitely wised me up to importance of her kindness and patience. Sure she might have seemed like a "doormat" at the beginning, but the more u learnt about her, the more her inner strength and self sacrificial love for Percy was apparent. TV Sally just doesn't have that, it doesn't feel like she has that much affection for Percy, she seems more distant and less loving. TV Sally has far too many scenes of her raising her voice at Percy and being frustrated with him, it makes it seem more like she was randomly stuck with this child and while she loves him, she knows deep down she would have been happier without him. Again, understandable but not book Sally. I feel they've sort of played up Percy's fierce love for his mum (or maybe it just feels more so because its more present in his spoken lines), but it doesn't feel as justified. If anything, id believe a more messy wrought relationship between the two. Its not a bad thing she's not the exact same as her book counterpart, but I do think it was a bad decision when they went so hard on Percy being ride or die for her, when most of her longer scenes are her being just frustrated with Percy being a child.

Gabe. ok more of a hot take I guess but I seriously disagree with his re-characterization. I don't mean to downplay anyone's experiences with toxic or abusive partners, but Gabe is far too bland and inoffensive. At worst, he's kind of annoying and maybe lazy. But he is nothing like the human sht stain that was book Gabe. Book Gabe deserved petrification and a lot worse, TV Gabe does not. The guy deserves a break up, not murder. Me and my friend actually laughed at him, because he didn't give "beats his wife and emotionally abuses her and her child", he gave "dead beat crypto boyfriend". Maybe it was the casting as well, the actor was funny and just seemed more goofy than actively horrid. "what makes u think he hasn't hit sally?" have u met TV Sally?? are u kidding me? she would have that man arrested.

Hades. I don't actually dislike making Hades friendly and more sassy. Sure its not book accurate, but you could argue its a little more mythologically accurate (maybe). My real problem is that he lacks PRESCENCE. Yes he can be nicer ect in this, but he is still the GOD OF THE UNDERWORLD. He should still be able to command a room! His words, even if they're not malicious or intimidating, should hold a certain kind of weight. I don't blame the actor here, I think he does well with what he's given but pretty much everyone else dropped the ball here. If they had supported him, we could have had a friendly Hades that was still a fitting lord of the underworld. Writers, directors, lighting, sound, ect let him down.

Persassy. Percy was great in the beginning but I felt like he started to lose that as the show went on, to give more of his lines/sassy moments to the other members of the trio. Which wasn't a terrible idea, I just think they did it too much, especially with the Ares scenes. Percy is meant to have an epic beef with Ares so much it transcends magic amnesia, but I could not believe that with the current lack of sass. Even the upcoming battle doesn't feel as weighty or deserved as it should. Again, don't hate the idea of sharing the sass around, just don't think it should come at the cost of Percy being toned down so much.

Getting into the underworld / mattress scene WHAT WAS THAT. I can accept that Percy knows more about Greek mythology because of his mom and i feel generally from just current cultural zeitgeist, but WHY THE HELL WOULD HE KNOW WHO CRUSTY IS?? and why was it so quick? there was no quick desperate clever thinking, it was like bro had read the scene from the book and then SPEED RAN IT. Also the Charon scene was far more interesting imo and I don't like that they cut it in favour for Crusty, without even doing that scene well. God that was so poorly executed.

Anyway thanks for reading my rant. Its long so it may seem like I didn't like the series but im being truthful when I say I did. I pretty much liked the rest of it, even some of the changes. I thinks a good show and adaption with some flaws, thats all. Im excited to finish up the season and im so pumped for season 2 and hopefully the rest of the series :D

#just musing #pjo #percy jackson #pjo tv series #percy jackson and the olympians #percy jackson series #pjo series #pjo tv show #pjo spoilers #pjo tv show spoilers #spoilers #percy jackson spoilers

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sparkle-skitty · 6 months

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FANFIC PIECE/GLIMPSE

I spent a STUPID long time on just this ONE BIT here so I am showing it to everyone whether y'all like it or not

For the record, this is just a scrap from the fanfic I am writing (attempting to) and because I am not a linear writer*, everything here is subject to change if/when I get to stringing it all together more coherently. So basically, it's a demo.

I proofread it a few times, but it may not be perfect because I am tired and also was originally writing entirely third person instead of second person but found myself mentally scripting in second person - so if anything sounds wonky, I'm all ears!

(*Meaning, I do not write start to finish, I write exactly what I feel like writing regardless if it's chronologically next. The scenes are coming to me in patchwork!)

Anyway, click read more for the excerpt.

CW for: mentions of child abuse, mentions of bullying, very slight blood, very slight violence, emotional outbursts/shutdown (y/n is neurodivergent), dislike of children (again, y/n is neurodivergent), aaaand I'm not sure what else to tag so lemme know if something is needed

(For the record, y/n has some of me plus some other things I've seen with other neurodivergent people written into them so HOPEFULLY it sounds at least somewhat relatable to others in the community)

You nearly ran into one of the play structures, too interested in watching what was going on by the door to the Daycare. An adult was getting more and more agitated, while Sun held a child behind him, with unimpressed and shrugging daycare workers passing to leave as their shift had ended. The only one who had remained had been talking between the adult and Sun, but was now finally giving up with a very loud "ugh!", throwing her hands in the air as she turned away to clock out.

It was now out of sight, and you were quickly putting away the armful of toys you had carefully balanced against you into the trunks they belonged, in order to get back to the scene asap. Your Employee Fazwatch buzzed on your arm, at first making you growl "Ugh, now what?!" but your irritation evaporated as you realized it was a message from Moon.

"That adult is not one of the child's authorized pick-up persons."

Moon must have caught you staring through the cameras. You instinctively glanced up at where you knew the nearest one was, knowing likely Moon was staring back from his little cyberspace world in the Attendants' shared body. But you quickly turned heel and speed-walked over to Sun.

You were certainly frustrated that, once again, poor Sun had been left behind to deal with the remaining Daycare children alone, but you were more angry now that they had so purposefully let him take the fall for the rules and regulations that even Fazbear Entertainment had to follow by law.

"You'd think by now I'd be over this," you thought. "Not like I've never had a job before where everyone was only looking out for themselves." But you knew very well it was because it was Sun, your friend, the sweetest guy in the world (probably), that you took it so personally. And also, maybe a little because most of the workers still treated him like a mindless machine, aaand possibly because a child was involved in a potentially dangerous situation.

Okay, maybe it made a little sense to take it personally.

As you drew closer, you realized Sun's hold on the child wasn't to keep the child from going to the adult, but rather the opposite - to keep the adult from getting at the child. At every turn he was putting himself between the adult and the child, and the boy looked nervous to say the least.

Your anger suddenly sparked into a blaze of fury upon the sight. No matter how much your rational side tried to tell them that it could be only because the tone of the conversation was scaring the kid, your feral inner child was screaming for blood, having the scene be a bit too familiar and hitting too close to home.

Sun caught sight of you from the corner of his eye, and turned to look with relief that someone might be coming to rescue them, only to be a little taken aback by the absolute darkness that was emanating from your being. The dangerous glint in your eyes, the snarl that curved your lips, revealing teeth tightly ground together - it was something he hadn't yet seen from his new friend. But once you looked at him and you both locked eyes, he saw a metaphorical mask rapidly apply, especially as you noticed the man had finally looked to see what Sun had been gazing at.

The mask replaced the baleful expression with one far more bright, friendly, and chipper. Though the animatronic could see the cracks in the disguise himself, he knew it was practically impossible for any random person to see. He couldn't help but stiffen as you approached and settled beside them. He had only worked with you for a short time, but it seemed so out of character!

"Hi there!" you greeted, launching into your Customer Service Voice, enthusiastic with a great smile, your eyes crinkling. "Is there something I can do for you?"

The man waved his hand around in anger, "It's about time someone came, besides this damn robot!" Sun tensed at the word and the inflection, but stayed quiet, watching with interest at how you hadn't even flinched with the man's loud and sharp tone.

"I am so sorry about that, looks like we're the only two left in the Daycare right now! What can I help you with?"

"Tell this metal idiot to give me my nephew, will you? I'm already running late!"

You turned to Sun, smile never faltering. "Hey Sunny, is there a problem?" you asked openly.

Sun caught the hint and quickly replied, "This person has not been set as a designated guardian for this child in our system."

"Ah, well!" you turned back to the man glowering at the both of you. "I'm afraid that we can not legally allow you to take the child from the Daycare, sir. I'm terribly sorry, but I'm sure you can understand the reasoning here. Just imagine if those weren't the rules! Kids could be carted off by just any ol' person, even criminals and bad guys!"

As you spoke, you gestured - and even winked - with great enthusiasm. Your hyper-upbeat tone not once fell, but the language used was definitely a subtle accusation.

"I'm afraid you'll have to forgive my friend here, but that's the protocol!"

"I want a manager!" the man spluttered, now thoroughly furious.

"Oh!" you exclaimed, a hand going to your mouth before you tilted your head in a bow. "I'm terribly sorry, again, sir, but..." you then lifted both arms towards Sun, gesturing as if presenting him for the first time. "He IS the manager. It's his Daycare after all! He's the boss, the head honcho, the big cheese, emphasis on the big part," you quietly added to the end, tone now finally slipping to indicate the threat.

Sun couldn't help but also notice that you were doing your nervous trait of babbling and trying to joke. But he wasn't so sure this was anxiety or a matter of barely containing yourself.

"Please leave before we have to contact security," you said after a moment of silent fuming from the man, optimism now back but with an edge to it, giving firmness to the command. "If the rightful guardian or guardians can not come, they will have to contact us themselves to add you in. Otherwise, we will not be able to release this child to you."

The guy looked around a bit, grumbling and muttering angrily, before very suddenly lurching forward towards you. Sun's arm shot out automatically to snatch the man by the shirt, to stop him and lift him away, but to his shock you made your own automatic response of swiping at the man's face.

Blood swelled from parts of the claw marks on his stunned expression, but not enough blood to actually run. You had mostly gotten him to the side of his face as he had turned at the last second to look at Sun, traveling just a bit across his jaw and cheek.

The facade was dropped in an instant as you huffed and shook from the adrenaline, then shrieked, "TRY THAT AGAIN, I FUCKIN' DARE YA!"

"Language!" Sun quickly reprimanded you, glaring at you. You tore your gaze from the man's bewildered face to look at him, then looked away, snorting through your nose and folding your arms across your chest. He sighed in exasperation, knowing that sort of maneuver all too well from the children and, well, Moon.

"I am not a brat," Moon grumbled in his head.

"I didn't say anything!" Sun internally responded back.

You looked the man up and down, feet now off the ground as Sun held him firm, but he wasn't struggling. You snatched the radio out of your pocket and calmly made the call to security to remove the man from the premises.

Even as the man was escorted out, Sun's internal monitors showed your heart was still pounding away. But when you glanced at the child, your look softened to one of embarrassment, or shame? You knelt down next to him.

"Hey, sorry about that kiddo, that... must have been scary," you mumbled.

Your interactions with the children were always awkward. You had told Sun you hated kids, but on top of that also had no idea how to deal with them. Every time you were like a deer in the headlights, a newborn giraffe trying to learn to walk - unsteady, unsure, and bewildered by everything.

Sun had so far learned that you at least knew enough to be nice to the kids and to excuse yourself when it got to be too much, which was more than he could say for most of the daycare workers, which was ironic given that you were, well... a glorified janitor.

The child nodded, sniffling. There was a pause, and then the boy released Sun's pant leg and ran over to you, wrapping his little arms around you. You were surprised, then cringed.

"Um, there there..." you said, patting his back gently. To your horror, you realized he was still crying and sniffling. Sun watched with amusement as your face silently twisted into disgust. You looked up at him, pleading with him to get the child away somehow, but Sun shook his head, crossing his arms. This is now a punishment, he decided. He knew you wouldn't dare just shove the kid away.

------------------------------------

You were scrubbing at your shirt with several sanitary wipes. The snot might be gone by now, but you weren't sure and still felt unclean.

It seemed like it took forever for the child's actual guardians to show up, and Sun was not only doing the checkout, but also the report about what had happened.

You had allowed that child to tug your hands, hug you, and you even picked him up when he gestured so. Gross gross gross, little snotty kids were the worst. They had no sense of cleanliness or manners regarding germs. You shuddered at the thought of wondering if he even wiped himself, then flopped back into the security desk chair with a groan. To take your mind off your child-germophobia, you pulled out your phone and began a round of Candy Crush.

Your timeblindness caught you up again as you suddenly looked up to see Sun standing on the other side of the desk. He had his arms folded again, and wore a frown.

"That wasn't being a very good role-model, you know."

"Heck off, I'm not Daycare staff, so I don't--"

"Ah ah!" Sun cut you off, "You ARE Daycare staff, buster, even if it's just to clean, and as you so eloquently put it, I'm the boss here. And I say you need to be a better role model."

"Well personally I like their spunk," Moon snickered in his head. Sun ignored him.

There was a moment of silence between you two, before you shrugged nonchalantly. "Oh well."

Sun's eyebrow twitched with irritation. "Don't "oh well" me! You were cussing, AND you got physical with a customer--"

"Not a customer, just a dick."

"Language! Let's just hope you didn't teach the little one to solve our problems with anger and violence."

"Right, let's hope he never believes a grownup will stand up for him again in his life," you growled mockingly.

Sun was stunned, feeling frustration rise. He put his head in his hand and let out an exasperated sigh. "You can stand up for people without resorting to attacking others."

"Not always. Not every time." you answered lowly.

Sun noticed your heart rate was starting to climb again, and you were beginning to shake. Well, if there's one thing about this whole debacle that was a positive, it's the fact you make it so obvious when you're upset or angry.

"Let's calm down," he said soothingly. "This is just a discussion, you don't need to get angry--"

You stood bolt upright from your chair, your voice raising, "This isn't a discussion! You're chastising and-and-and down-talking and-and... belittling me! For defending myself! Because-because what? The kid might see it and-and think, oh man I-I-I should probably do something if someone... if someone just-just.... comes at me!" You were stammering and practically vibrating with the sudden spike in temper.

Sun leaned back with his hands up, a look of surprise on his face. "Woah, woah, woah! Hold on! I'm sorry if that's how I made you feel, but the rules--"

"DAMN THE RULES! The rules are out of order! Th-th-this whole court is out of order! Stupid! Fuck! AUGH!"

"Now that's enough--!" Sun cut himself off when you slammed your rear back into the chair and spun it, rolling it back in the process, and faced the wall. Hands crossed, face red, you slumped in anger and drew in on yourself.

Sun let the silence settle, giving you both time to relax, and for you to come out of your shut down. You pulled out your phone and started blasting aggressive music.

Pinching the bridge of his nose, he sighed wearily. "Y/n, please, I'm sorry," he started, voice calm but raised enough to hear over the music. "I am not trying to treat you less, I'm sorry I made you so angry..." he lifted his head up at a thought. "Wait... why are you so angry? You were furious before, too, when you were coming to check on us."

You didn't answer, but you had lowered your foot and were now bouncing your leg.

"Give it a minute," Moon spoke to Sun. He paused before continuing, a hint of a grin in his voice, "I have to say, it's interesting to see someone put themselves in time out."

"They've shut down, Moonie, you know what a shut down is."

Moon hummed. "They did choose to sit in a chair and face a wall, though."

"Can't you take this seriously?"

Their conversation was interrupted by the sound of wheels on the floor. You had gently kicked off from the wall and were now rolling comically slow towards them. You had lowered your music, and still had a pout, eyes downcast, and your arms crossed. You bumped into the desk without a word.

More silence. Sun waited patiently, shoving down the anxiety trying to creep its way up. Nope! Not gonna go there!

Eventually, you swallowed your pride and spoke up. "I'm... sorry," you began slowly. "I lost my cool. It's been a while since I've dealt with... the public... on a, mm, personal level. And I'm sorry I scared the little guy." As you spoke, you turned the chair to sit properly at the desk, placing your elbows on it and clasping your hands.

You then looked up at Sun, and glared. "I'm NOT sorry about standing up for him. As a general thing. Even if I did it wrong."

"I'm on their side." Moon stated matter-of-factually. "...And don't you dare think what I think you'll think of that."

"The only thing I think of that is that you're both a bad influence on each other."

Sun's shoulders slumped. Well, it's a start, at least. He can work with this.

"Again, I'm sorry too, the rules are a bit of a... erm, a big deal to me, to put it simply." Sun stood poised to offer his explanation, even though Moon suddenly turned sour at the mere idea of talking about... that.

Meanwhile, you furrowed your brows, looking down at the desk again. You were also battling with bringing up some vulnerability, and chewed your lip. He did ask, but is it too awkward to bring up now?

You took a deep breath, "Anyway... I lost my cool because... I..." your voice trailed off with a drawn-out croak, but Sun didn't interrupt or interject. It took a minute for you to build your courage again.

"Well... when I was... a kid," you spoke haltingly, taking your time in order to keep your voice and emotions level. "I was... bullied. A lot. Really badly. Just for being weird, I guess, I dunno... And, nobody helped me. So I just, took care of it myself. Or, well, tried to." You glanced back up at Sun, "That's... ssssorta why I had that, uh, kneejerk reaction, when that dude tried to- when he just- when he came at me like that."

Sun and Moon were both listening intently. It wasn't often their human coworkers would open up, and in particular, you had made yourself a bit of an anomaly with your unpredictable statements and odd behaviour - an anomaly that they had taken a liking to, admittedly. Maybe they just liked anomalous people, since it seemed to be a pattern.

"That... doesn't quite explain what made you angry in the first place, though..." Sun said softly, not wanting to accidentally spook you from talking it out.

You sat back, your chin tucked in and your eyes cast down, and crossed your arms. Sun feared he had in fact actually caused exactly what he was trying to avoid, but you spoke back up.

"Yeah... yeah... the bullies... the worst ones were adults."

Boom. Bombshell.

Sun and Moon would have exchanged shocked glances if they had the ability to. Oh yes, they were well aware that adults could be bullies to other adults, including animatronics, but to kids? Unthinkable! The very notion sent their protocols in a little tizzy.

"Teachers, mostly," you continued. You took a deep, shaking breath. "But... then there were, of course... family members. Specifically my parents. Especially when I started getting into fights, oh they hated that. I was an embarrassment to them for not being like..." you waved your hand around, attempting to find the word, emotions building and causing brainfog. "Y'know, uh, demure and-and delicate and sweet and pretty and... and all that sh- crap..."

You settled back into the desk chair, your arms now laid against the arms of the chair. You still didn't look up, and began idly picking and clawing at the ends of said armrests. You took careful, slow breaths, trying to keep from bursting into a fit of some sort - most likely a crying fit, if anything. It'd been a very, very long time since you'd actually talked about all of this, and for precisely this reason.

"So, um, you can imagine - I think you can anyway - the kinds of things they did to try and--"

"They... they what?! They thought THAT was more embarrassing than their child being bullied!?" Sun exclaimed, flabbergasted.

The suddenness of his interjection widened your eyes for a minute, then you gave a laugh - a hollow, awful giggle that was laced with all the anger, hurt, anxiety, and vulnerability you were feeling at the moment.

"Um, yeah!? Kids will be kids, after all," you sneered mockingly. Not at him, but at the past. "I was just overreacting and causing a scene, of course." You slumped into the chair so low you could have easily slid out. "Of course..." you muttered. Your outburst had been sufficient to release all that negative energy you'd been building.

"So um... yeah... that's why I was... prrrrobably more than a little ready to go feral on that guy... He just had that vibe, you know? You know the one."

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