#no like i do have several good excuses as to why i didn't say anything but oh boy. listening to them hurt

[cottagec0relover21]

Ok so, the idea just popped in my mind and I RLLY need someone to write it LMAO

Your Chilchuck fics give me LIFE so you were me go to, no questions asked

Could I get Chilchuck with a reader (preferably male, but gender neutral is also ok!) who miscalculated the ammount of anxiety medication they had left and ended up running out in the middle of the dungeon? Reader is having a hard time with their anxiety ticks and one of the side effects of going a bit too long without them is his body starting to "shut down" and become slightly like a ragdoll. Reader is still talkative and behaves as normal besides their head going to the side aggressively, flopping to the side and body parts just going all weak when they sit, flopping legit like a ragdoll (this os very self indulgent and has happened to me once, it is not good to say the least LMAO)

I completely understand if this makes you uncomfortable to write! And if so, a reader with severe generalized anxiety would work in the place of this request!

Hii! I'm sorry if this took too long ;-; since I have generalized anxiety and therefore I'm more knowledgeable about that subject, I'll write for a reader with severe generalized anxiety. I don't want to fuck up the other option with the ticks and such, because I don't know about the condition and I don't want to offend anyone. So hopefully this is okay!! love y'all thanks for being patient!

(Also changing my POV today) I'm so glad you love the way I write, it means the world to know that💗

"A Comforting Half-ling"

[Chilchuck Tims x gn!reader]

Warnings: none - fluff

Your hands were sweaty. You had been fidgeting with your fingers for a while, feeling a pit at the bottom of your stomach that made you even more anxious that you already were. The slight pang of pain in the chest that came from time to time the more you thought about the problem at hand bothering you as you sat on the corner of one of the rooms of the dungeon that the group had stopped by. Why were you so anxious? Simple. There was another party in that same room, and the rest of the group had decided to be all social and chat for a bit as they sat down to take a break from walking around.

Gosh I must look really weird sitting alone in this corner. I think they didn't hear me when I said "hi." What if they think I'm an asshole? Or a weirdo? Or a weird asshole?! you thought, looking around the room.

—Oh yeah, and that one there is (y/n), they're kinda shy— you jumped, your head snapping back to stare at the middle of the room as Laios pointed a finger back at you. Everyone's eyes were on you. Never had you wanted earth to swallow you whole and never come back so desperately before.

As the conversation resumed, the half-foot's eyes stayed on you, a curious and worried expression on his face as he watched you fidget with your hands.

He excused himself softly and walked up to them.

—Hey, why don't you come with me for a second? I need your help with something— Chilchuck pointed to the door, and your feet hurried to stand up and get out of the room as quickly as possible. Once outside that room, and away from the hearing range of the others, he sat against the wall, patting the space beside him.— What's got you so jumpy?— he looks at you, genuine curiosity in his voice.

Looking at him, you wonder if it's okay to admit out loud how anxious you were about, not just talking to people, but almost anything that had to do with being in public.— You're always behind us when we encounter other parties, and you don't seem to want to be there. I'm starting to think you're not just "shy"— Chilchuck called you out.

Beginning to explain to him how you were always on edge around people wasn't the easiest task. Admitting that, you were afraid of not being seen as capable, but being seen as a bother or even a burden ate you up every second of your life to Chilchuck was hard but worth it, because now you had someone that understood you better than any of the rest of the group. Everyone gets a little anxious at times, but you were a little extra anxious about everything.

Sitting cross-legged and now intently staring at you as you finished your through explanation of how you felt almost all the time, Chilchuck sighed and placed a comforting hand over your shoulder.— I'm really sorry you have to feel like that. I get anxious for five minutes and I hate it, so you being on edge all the damn time must suck— he offered a sympathetic apology, understanding you easily.— Whenever you feel like that, just... uh– try and tell me, or nudge me, whatever works best for you— he smiles softly, and the look on your face makes him huff softly in embarrassment and look away, retrieving his hand from your shoulder. When you give a soft laugh at his reaction he starts protesting and huffing at you, although we all know he wasn't seriously that upset.

When you hug him, however, he falls silent and sighs, taking a moment to return your embrace.

From then on Chilchuck tries his best to comfort you and help you everytime he notices you feeling anxious.

You need to buy something but can't because you're afraid of taking too long and upsetting the line behind you? He'll go with you and hold your hand. Maybe you're afraid of the guy at the stall, selling whatever it is you want to buy. Don't worry, he'll talk for you when you get nervous and start to stutter. Or even if you don't even want to talk at all.

Afraid someone is judging you? He's jokingly rolling his sleeves up and asking "Who? Who is it? Point at them and they'll never see what got them!" (They won't but that's because he's small and he kicks their knee from behind)

If you feel like everyone is judging you, though, he holds your hand and guides you away into a corridor/hallway where it's less crowded

Ever start hyperventilating? The first time he'll panic, and he'll struggle to find the words and actions to properly help you calm down. But it doesn't take him long before he has it memorized.

You're basically the only one on the group who's got Chikchuck breaking his rules about innerparty relationships, because he's grown very close and attached to you.

You're such an amazing person, you shouldn't have to struggle like this.

He gets very happy for you when you manage to do something that makes you anxious on your own. Maybe you spoke up to a whole group of people completely alone, or maybe you went and bought something that you really wanted without struggling at all.

When that happens he's sure to give you a smile and a thumbs up or a pat on your leg (you're taller than him, don't tease him about it or he'll get all red in the face and start mumbling to himself)

Overall, Chilchuck would understand you and try to help. He struggles, and sometimes you might think you're being a bother for him, but he makes sure to tell you that "no, you're not a burden nor a bother. I'm simply... not used to comforting people that often."

+ romantic established relationship headcannons

If you tell him that having him by your side is comforting, even in the slightest, he'll cough and look away, hiding his growing embarrassment.

If you ask to borrow something of his to comfort you, he's scrambling all over his words but eventually giving said item to you gladly.

You hide your face in his scarf after wrapping it around your neck and softly inhale his scent— Ah... you smell so nice. And the scarf is so warm— so is his face. A beautiful tomato red all over his cheeks and ears as he looks at you, genuinely feeling better just by borrowing his scarf.

Or maybe you borrow his gloves (if they fit) and put them on.— Okay... but why my gloves?— he asks curiously, waiting an eyebrow as he looks up at you.

You smile, wiggling your fingers after putting the gloves on— Makes me feel like I'm holding your hand— he falls silent, and he opens his mouth to speak, but the only thing that comes out is a flustered exhale as he turns around and walks away from you as he mumbles a "you're unbelievably.... cute" that you're sure he didn't mean for you to hear.

A few minutes later he'll return by your side as you're walking and extend his hand up, looking ahead— You can just hold my damn hand, you know?— he mumbles, and you notice how his cheeks tint with red once again.

#delicious in dungeon #dungeon meshi #chilchuck tims x reader #fanfic #chilchuck #chilchuk tims

[stephenrea]

the lads at work were talking about breaking bad today.........

#and i didn't join in..... #no like i do have several good excuses as to why i didn't say anything but oh boy. listening to them hurt #they literally started assigning eachother kins 😐 #they're out here having their brothers4life moment over a show two of them haven't even finished yet #meanwhile my literally-the-only-woman-in-the-workplace ass is standing there. los pollos hermanos logo on my tiddies #like 'they don't know breaking bad altered the course of my life forever' #they don't even know gus is gay........ #one of them doesn't even know who gus is!!! #he's a new a guy and the reaction to him joining the team has been....... significantly different from when i came in😐 #and like this kid deserves all the positive attention he can get #but i can't help but be a liiiiittle🤏 bit jealous that he gets addressed by his actual name as opposed to 'honey' #and gets to bond over my all time favourite show with the boys #while i get told by my boss and his lackeys to give em a smile every. fucking. time. i walk by #so uh. guess i'll just go fuck myself then🤷‍♀️ #work posting #my nonsense

[mntcoronet]

me thinking about how I've always felt like one of the "odd"/more weird n solitary kids at school, most of my longest-lasting friends who I find easiest to get along with are neurodivergent in some way, and a lot of the characters I end up really vibing with in a "self recognition through the blorbo" way are also commonly interpreted as being neurodivergent for a lot of the same reasons that I relate to them about: "hmm this definitely doesn't mean anything. not at all. I am just bad at life and i just need to try harder"

#maggles ramblings #and yes i know none of this inherently means anything but i have been wondering about this kind of thing for... several years now #and i must say!! some of the coincidences seem a bit too consistent!! #luckily i am going to see A health professional in about a month's time. so hopefully they will be able to give me some thoughts #i just am not confident enough to say im even LIKELY to have anything bc if I'm wrong then I'll feel the absolute worst about it #> ignores the fact that my mum is literally staying in the mental health ward rn so if she has struggles I'm more likely to have some too #but yea it's like. well i have passable social skills... (bc i spend a lot of time quietly observing ppl instead of talking to them myself) #i did well at school ..... (but excelled the most in primary school when the worksheets were simple and quick to do - #and only got things done on time in high school bc of my fear that the teachers would be disappointed in me if i didn't) #some ppl are just easier to talk to.... (when i know they're more likely to say what they mean and not have any hidden expectations of me) #i don't have focus problems.... (i just find it tough to do things unless my brain decides i really want to spend several hours on it NOW) #surely my teachers would've noticed... (but i was good at the work and planned what to say to them so they didn't worry abt me) #im not as intensely interested in stuff though.. (i literally spend half my days rotating them in my mind i just don't want to bother ppl) #etc etc you get what I'm trying to say. brain has a million excuses as to why i just suck at life #also i literally only figured out the other year or so ago. that when asked how you're doing. you're generally meant to ask it back #I THOUGHT I WAS GREAT WITH MANNERS but whenever teachers would ask me i treated it like a. quiz or something #and sometimes i think i did that with other people too. so. apologies to anyone who has ever dealt with me answering that way #and not returning the question. i genuinely didn't know you were supposed to do that and idk how that slipped past me

[xjulixred45x]

I could't contain myself guys sorry--

Bro, do you realize how scary it would be to have Vox as a Yandere?

just imagine it. You could be one of his workers, maybe too good at your job, because not only do you do what Vox tells you without asking questions, but you also know what to say and what not to say to avoid a "tantrum" from him. or rather, when his insecurities attack with force like when Alastor returns.

Vox would probably be a somewhat condescending yandere (as seen with Val) but don't think you can't turn tables easily, if you stroke his ego enough, you can have him around your finger. but that doesn't make it any less dangerous for those around you.

He makes the typical 180 degree turn in attitude when it comes to Other Employees and when it comes to You. Damn, you may be the only one of his employees who gets paid vacations (or even vacations) or even birthday bonuses, things like that. He likes to give you his things or products with the excuse that "they are for testing" even if they have already been released on the market.

Like:

Vox: who the fuck eat My leftovers!?! WHENEVER WHO WAS I'M GOING TO-

Darling: it was me sir.

Vox:--give You the rest and take You out for lunch, You haven't eaten in the whole day AGAIN, didn't ya?

He definitely avoids conflict with you by hypnotizing you, when he starts to feel hostility, fear on your part or that you want to leave, he makes you "out of nowhere" have "ONE MORE TASK" and you can't help but do what he says.

and IT IS NOT just to avoid fights or for you to leave, it is something CONSTANT (once every two days MINIMUM), although Vox is not worried about your brain turning into mush due to its powers, it always keeps nutritious things in your diet and they come out relatively often , as you have to follow him everywhere.

Eventually he becomes more clingy and needy in this case, it's practically not that he's proposing to you or anything, he's just slowly dragging you into a relationship without you realizing it (because you're not lucid enough). Unless you develop a higher level of tolerance to his hypotonic trick, I don't think you'll notice his Red Flags.

I think it would be ESPECIALLY BAD if Darling is also a Sinner, because then they wouldn't even be able to get out of the pride ring to run away from Vox. leaving you with many fewer options and having to avoid all of Vox's technology, which you could only achieve by 1- going to the Cannibal Legion or 2- going to the Hazbin Hotel.

Running away is EXTREMELY DIFFICULT, not only because of his hypnotic trick, but because he literally has EYES EVERYWHERE, on every screen in hell. If you somehow manage to get away with it and run away, Vox would be SO ANGRY and looking for you all over hell with their screens.

Although definitely if you were gone more than a day, he would be more distraught than angry and would begin to despair. Even Val and Velvet would give him a hand because of how bad it would be.

Just imagine, thinking that you finally lost sight of Vox's search drones, without realizing that you stand in front of some store and VOX ITSELF appears on the screens :)

If you made the stupid decision to go to the Hazbin Hotel, Vox would be distraught and would even think that Alastor was somehow holding you hostage, obviously! Why would you go there if you knew his biggest enemy was there? Alastor must be using you as a bargaining chip! How dare he!?

(in this case, fortunately, the punishment is much less severe, but he would definitely monitor you for the rest of your life)

When he eventually gets you back (after a few days or even WEEKS of anguish) expect, first of all, to be in a mortal embrace that lasts AT LEAST 2 days and then receive your "punishment" which would be to be under hypnosis for AT LEAST 1 YEAR to be sure that this NEVER HAPPENS AGAIN.

Although calm down! He gives your mind breaks periodically because 1- he doesn't know if that would ultimate mess with your head and 2- it's nice to hear YOU talk instead of the robotic version.

When that year FINALLY ends, you will be a much more obedient, more terrified, sweeter version of You, according to Vox, like a frightened Deer. It was a long and hard process, but the good thing is that you don't have to do anything anymore! absolutely! Just do what he tells you and everything will be fine.

Shares, reblogs and comments are very welcome!

Not one of the Best yanderes to have, but Def not the worst

#headcanons #drabbles #fem reader #neutral reader #male reader #hazbin hotel x reader #hotel hazbin #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel vox #hazbin vox #vox x reader #yandere vox #yandere hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor

[kooqitas]

... law class & sex ★ with: jjk!

#pairings: teacher!jjk X reader

#synopsis: you didn't think your teacher would notice how desperate you were for his cock

#tags: teacher!jk, pwp, cockslut, rough sex, spanking, semi public sex (?), creampie, vaginal sex, overstimulation, degradation, humiliation,

🌸 . . nsfw, +18 | 

────────────────── ୭ ──────────────────ㅤ

"you fucking pervert. you like this, don't you? is this pussy wet after seeing my class?"

your teacher looks like you are a freak, yeah, maybe you are.

to be honest, it is kinda difficult to explain how this happened. you really have a big crush on your teacher and of course if he asks you to ride on his dick, but he's never made a mention about that, unlike this, he's really so kind and respectful with you and your friends. 

but he’s hot. super hot.

you feel your underwear wet after the moment you stepped on the class.

jeon jungkook is your teacher of criminal law, and you really like your teaching methods, but being a young adult in a constant fertile period doesn’t help. 

the teacher is so attractive, every part of your body, with the passing of the months you just want to sit on his face and sucking your dick. 

but you always hide this, except for today.

you never felt your pussy so wet when this man started speaking like annalise keating, and your tight pants doesn’t help, your thighs make you insane. 

the only thing you can do is take a lollipop and leave it in your mouth, sucking like jungkook's dick.

he got it. you practically devore him with eyes when sucks the candy.

the class is over, so he’s calling you.

“what’s your problem today?”

is he looking at your nipples? wow

“excuse me, sir?”

“to be honest, i really receive several proposals to eat my students, but you know, i always decline…”

it’s true, you always hear your friends say that they have tried something more with jungkook, insinuations, short clothes, inappropriate photos, everything, but he always said “no”. 

this is one of the motives you never tried anything.

“i know that, but i can’t understand why u tell me this, sir…”

“oh! really?” he asked, the mocker tone evident in his voice. “what you want of me, sweetheart?”

“excuse me?”

oh, jungkook we're going to humiliate you? say that you’re a pervert and he never wants anything with you? really? 

“i see how you look to me when sucks that lollipop, i see in your face how that cunt makes you wet at each little word i said.” he’s raised, staying in front of you. “you want that i fuck you, stupid whore?”

jungkook's face changed. he’s look like a devil, maybe the pleasure, but still a devil.

what the fuck he’s doing? all your friends say that he always said “i'm not interesting, bye” but why now he’s spoken like that? 

“i made a question, because to be honest, i’m tired of hiding how much i want to fuck your cute little drippy cunt, of hiding how much i want make you cum on my cock and made you my personal slut”

“y-yes, i want”

he laughed.

"you fucking pervert. you like this, don't you? is this pussy wet after seeing my class?"

so, he stood in front of you, grabbing her waist tightly and sticking his tongue in her mouth.

“the d-dor.” you said.

“that’s ok, i don’t care if someone see i fucking a whore.”

without a warning, he lifted your skirt and rubbed his middle finger on you wet underwear. you moaned.

“this is a good slut, i even need to prepare you with my fingers, you are so wet to my cock, desperate for me to fill you with my sperm, no?” he still rubbed, now your clit, your legs trembled and you feel that you can cum in his fingers. “we need to be faster, i said that i don’t care if someone see, but if this happened we can’t play anymore”

“p-please.” you even know for what you are asked, have jungkook brushing his middle finger on your clit is like a fucking wet dream.

“can your sweet and little pussy take my fat cock?” you feel the other hand pinched your nipple, and scream because of the pain. “a word, sweetheart, i need a word because nothing else will make me stop to fuck this hole open.”

“i dont need a w-word. i want everything.”

he pinched your clit, and you scream again, made him laugh on your ear.

“knew a dumb slut like you was good to me. desperate to feel begging me to defile this tight, no? but i need a word. but i know you won't use it, you're desperate to cry while i tear that pussy apart.” 

you said a word, nothing special just “popcorn”, don’t have a motive or anything, is just a random word that you can remember if it is necessary.

you even notice when he removed the belt and underwear, just feel he’s dick opening you without any care, it didn't hurt, you were too excited for that, of course, a slight burning but nothing that wasn't pleasurable.

“now, my favorite student, watch me dick fuck this little hole open” he said when he lifted your skirt and grabbed your leg, leaning against the table to leave you open for him. 

jungkook isn’t a ‘gentleman’ he’s fucking you like a toy, the table is shaking because the power of that he hit you and you scream everytime his ball hit in you.

you see his sucking his middle finger and you can’t understand what happens, but the confusion soon disappears when you feel him rub his finger wet with spit on you asshole.

“next time, i use this hole.”

“c-cu-”

“you gonna cum?” he let go of your waist to leave a slap on your face. “is your teacher's cock so hot that you're going to cum on it?”

“y-yeah.”

“so cum, whore!” he slap on your face again, and again.

and when the orgarms finally came, he kissed you trying to muffle your screams.

he continuous to fucking your pussy. you ruined and felt the overstimulation, your body didn't stand up, but his still fucking.

still fucking untill cum on your pussy, the white liquid oozing on you. 

the floor is a mess, the table is a mess, and you is a mess too.

you think that is over, but jungkook got on his knees and sucks you. 

making him swallow your cum and his.

“so…” she said, standing up and fixing his pants. “i want to fuck you everyday now.”

“i'll do anything for my favorite teacher.”

“so when you get home, send me a video of your shower. i will be waiting.”

🌸 . . part 2 maybe?

#bts x reader #bts x you #bts smut #ao3 #ao3 link #ao3 writer #bts #bts x fem!reader #bts x y/n #jungkook x oc #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #jungkook smut #jungkook #jk x reader #jk #★... lulli writes

[sadokasochism]

For me, the most heartbreaking aspect of Ivan is that the poor clueless bastard didn't have the tools to express his affection in any way that didn't involve violence or manipulation, or weren't too inscrutable, quiet, or unseen to be picked up by Till.

I definitely interpret Ivan as autistic for several reasons, a big one being their Segyein teacher's notes about him:

It's just. Classic ND behaviour to me.

Not only does expressing emotion and communicating the way other kids do not come naturally to Ivan, but it's not as if he's been given a great example of coping with this from the Segyein.

Ivan managed to mask in a way that made him popular with other students, and got him in the good graces of their captors. He did everything expected of him to survive and thrive in this environment.

Then he meets Till, inscrutable and very different to the other kids, just like Ivan is. Except, Till doesn't mask. He doesn't change or try to endear himself to their captors, and he doesn't bend to anyone, no matter how much he is hurt and punished for it.

This is a new situation for Ivan, and he's never had anything to compare his feelings to. He also can't figure out how to communicate with Till, every interaction, no matter how well meaning, seems to end in failure.

I bring your attention to the cheer up comic, and how, again, autistic this interaction feels:

There could be many reasons why Ivan chose to say what he did, but to me it feels like ND bluntness not being received well. And that's fair! From Till's perspective Ivan is being a jerk for no good reason.

Instead of responding with glee towards Till laying him out (as we see from Ivan when they're a bit older), Ivan justs seems... really confused. Like he didn't expect that statement to upset Till that much, and he didn't expect Till to respond in the way he did. Everything was fine a second ago, what went wrong?

Then, Ivan uses the phrase he learned from Till in an attempt to self sooth. It might have been the first example of comfort after an injury/hurt he had ever seen, given how he defaults to it. And it was from Till trying to cheer up a flower.

This also shows some of Till's blindspots. He has grown up having to be vigilant, because violence and hurt have been a core part of his upbringing. This leads to anything he doesn't immediately, clearly understand being perceived as a threat or a slight, and so he reacts violently to Ivan's statement.

I'll also draw your attention to this comic where, as far as we know, Ivan is simply stating a true fact in a blunt manner:

In my interpretation, these types of interactions keep adding up, and Ivan is grasping at straws the whole time, trying to be closer to Till and failing every time.

Eventually, the only surefire way to get Till's attention is to piss him off, provoke him, manufacture scenarios to talk to him. I'm not excusing this behaviour, but I understand where Ivan could be coming from, from the perspective of both an emotionally immature/stunted child and/or an ND child.

Despite how much they fight and bicker, at every moment it really mattered, Ivan was there for Till. It was always Ivan coming to free him, to take off his collar or gag, and it was Ivan who led their escape.

Ivan couldn't leave Till behind when he went back for Mizi. Even with the confirmation that Till would choose Mizi over Ivan every time, Ivan couldn't leave him.

The miscommunication goes two ways though. It's insane to think that Till didn't care about Ivan at all. They were close as kids, and I doubt Till ever forgot about the escape he gave up.

We have the graduation messages, where Ivan is able to write something that could be reasonably interpreted as affectionate or fond towards Till.

Meanwhile, Till's message-

If we're being charitable with our interpretations, we can say this was Till's way of saying 'of course I remember you' and attempting to communicate that Ivan HAD left a lasting impact on him.

However, how could any reasonable person be expected to get THAT out of 'you stole my fucking pencil'? Ivan could have taken this one of two ways:

1) Omg he remembers me 🥰

2) he leans into his 'i will never be loved back' bias and thinks that Till really doesn't care about him at all

Who the hell knows what goes through that weird little brain of his. But given how Round 6 went, and what Ivan had to say in the confession comic, he obviously didn't think his impact was significant enough.

Then Alien Stage happens, and in Round 3 Ivan is FINALLY communicating his feelings in a way that is vulnerable and might even have a chance of being understood as love and yearning!

Till is unconscious through it until the very end.

Then in the next round, Mizi goes missing, and Till can't care about anything anymore.

Ivan finds him after the private performance, takes off his gag, and just holds him. Again, Till is unconscious for all of this.

Then, in Round 6, not only is Till distraught from the disappearance of Mizi, but he's given no time to process what the fuck is going on before Ivan is dead at his feet. Till might have finally had a chance to really understand where Ivan was coming from, how he really felt all this time, and Ivan DIES.

And still, Ivan's most transparent act of affection? It's delivered with violence. He's kissing a distraught Till who tries to push him away, and neither of them are happy. He puts his hands around Till's neck, not really hurting him, but it's enough to look convincing for the cameras, and it's enough for Till to go limp and wait for death. Ivan's final loving act is to give Till a soft look with blood pouring out of his mouth, that Till still does not see, and then let go before falling to the ground.

It's just a collection of failures. We see from Ivan that he truly loved Till, made a lot of selfless decisions for his sake, was filled with so much longing and affection, but he just couldn't get it across in a way that doesn't seem fucking deranged from an outsider's perspective. And when he DID manage to communicate his feelings more clearly, it was to a Till that was unconscious, or too distracted/dense/traumatised to see Ivan's actions as ones of love.

There's no guarantee that Till would have reciprocated even if Ivan had managed to communicate his feelings in a healthier way, but there was at least a CHANCE. At least Ivan could have gotten some closure, even if he was rejected.

Instead Ivan died thinking he was completely unloved by the person who he cared about more than anything else, and his last ditch effort to make Till understand was deeply flawed and uncomfortable.

If these kids had grown up any other way, maybe they could have had a chance. Unfortunately, the world they were in didn't equip them to not hurt eachother in their attempts to grow closer.

#alien stage #alien stage ivan #alien stage till #alnst #alnst ivan #alnst till #ivantill #tillivan #alien stage round 6 #if you saw me edit this a bunch of times trying to link the masterdoc post no you didnt

[ghostlywhiskey]

price x reader - loopholes

╰▸john price is an unfaithful husband, but he'll think of every excuse to lessen the severity of his acts.‎‎ ‎‎‎‎‎‎‎

word count: 1,355 cw‎:‎ angst nsfw - cheating, brief dry humping, rough p in v with no protection

"john," the whine escaping your lips as your back slams against the door not long after it was slammed shut by price. the sound of the door had sent a smacking sound throughout the deserted hallway, but it wouldn't alarm anyone regardless. doors slamming in fits of anger wasn't anything new.

though, it wasn't anger that ran through price's veins. well, maybe slight anger, the frustration with you had been rising all day. and, in the midst of night was the only time he could let it all pour out of him.

"don't 'john' me." voice gruff, the familiarity of the tone causing your body to straighten out like a command was barked at you. it was never john when you two were alone together. too personal.

"yes, captain" your breath catching in your throat before his hand met your neck, the squeeze causing you to gasp for air as fingers pressed into your skin.

"care to explain your various attempts today that would have people question my character?" price growled as his lips grazed past your cheek, coming right next to your ear as his breathing cause shivers to run down your spine.

"no, captain." you stated, the back of your head resting against the door. brain warning you to correct your answer before the grip on your neck would tighten. "it was inappropriate and out of line."

"i'd say good girl, but you've been pretty fuckin' stupid today, yeah?" the hand on your neck releasing its grip as it drags down your chest to the hem of your shirt.

"stupid or strategic? got what i wanted, didn't i?" a satisfied hum pushed up your throat, your hands now in the clear to move as they pleased. hands that headed straight for the buckle of his belt.

a low chuckle exits his body, his own hands grabbing at your wrists as he walks his body back and guides yours to follow him. seating himself in the chair, without missing a beat you drop to your knees in front of him as he spreads his legs apart. forearms resting on his thighs as you give them a playful squeeze, looking up at him. fingertips brushing a piece of your hair back before his thumb glides across your lips.

"you're a brat," he mutters, your lips parting as you let his thumb push in as you secure your latch around it. slow and dragged out sucks building saliva around him, his blue eyes darkening as he watched you. after a few more moments, you pull back with a 'pop' sound at the release.

"you're no fun." you pout, hands moving back to his belt to work on removing it again before you were interrupted before.

"i'm married."

"hasn't stopped you before." it hadn't, you were right and he knew it.

his body lifted from the chair to tug his pants down, his hard on quickly met by his hand while you now raised to your feet. the focus now on your own attire as you worked to remove it.

the pants slid down your legs, but before you could have your panties join them on the floor around your ankles before you kicked them away, his free hand grabbing to stop you. your body guided once again to straddle his lap, his cock pressed against the already soaked fabric.

"just let me take them," your words cut off has his hands grab at your hips to move you against him, a soft 'oh' replacing anything you were going to say originally. he did it every time. he fought with himself in his head about what he was doing, finding every little thing he could do to make himself feel better.

"i don't have any condoms." he defended his actions of why he stopped you from removing them.

he did everything he could to make himself feel like he wasn't a complete shit husband cheating on his wife back home. a wife who had been with him since the start of his career.

having you dry hump against him, only letting you give him head or vice versa. wearing a condom and still pulling out when he would cum. all of these things made sense to him, made him feel like they were loop holes to the act of adultery.

but the feeling of his cold ring pressed against your skin caused your brain to fire out an idea. stilling your hips, you grabbed his left wrist and brought his palm up to your lips. kissing softly before lips pressed against his ring finger.

the action made your own stomach tie into knots, but it was an idea.

"doesn't count if the ring is off." your murmur against his hand, eyes watching him closely as you see his own brain register what you just said.

a loophole.

"so," eyes burning into yours as he watched your lips kiss the ring, a ring that didn't promise himself to you. "take it off for me." if he took it off, he's accountable.

nodding, lips made their wait to the top of his ring finger before you took it in your mouth, tongue swirling around to let the saliva build around the ring. your teeth at the base of the ring tugging at it to drag it up his finger until it was off, secured between your teeth. your fingers reaching to take it from your mouth and setting it down on the desk behind you.

"fuckin' 'ell," price groans, reaching for your face to look at him and pulling you down to his lips. his own teeth tugging at your bottom lip and lips pressed against yours while your hands grab at his neck. "lift up for me."

your body raising off his slightly before you feel fingers drag from back to front against your folds, knees nearly buckling. his fingers tugging the panties to the side as he guides you back down. his cock met with your already dripping cunt as you press down, nails digging into his shoulders.

"fuck." the two of you moan in unison, however, you drag out the 'uck' of the word.

"always take me so fuckin' well," price mutters mainly to himself, your hips finding a rhythm as his hands grip at your waist again. "so tight," he huffs out as you press back down on him, his hands holding you down for brief moment to feel you pulsate around him. "so fuckin' warm and wet too."

a string of moans muffled into the side of his neck as you bury your head into the crook, pressure released as he lets you resume your pace. "captain," the whine causing him to shush you, one hand coming to your neck as he holds you against him.

"don't be makin' too much noise," he warns, but its a useless warning as the sound of skin smacking against each other echoes through the room. if anyone were to pass by they could easily pick up on the sounds behind the door.

your walls clench around him every time you come back down, trying to latch around him, the feeling of him in you without a condom is addicting.

and his body reacting the same way as his grunts fill your ears, hands gripping onto you so tight that you'd figure there would be marks to show for it the next morning. he guides your body up and down to match up with his words, "fuckin. dirty. girl."

you wince at the final word as he holds you down. thick cum filling you quickly before your own thighs shaking, release around him as your arms wrap around his neck to hold him close.

both of your breaths heavy as try to come down from the high. after a few moments, the two of you pulling apart from each other, focused on cleaning and redressing yourselves. as you tug on your pants, your eyes catching price who is dressed again as if nothing happened, staring at the ring on his desk.

the hesitation is brief, but still noticeable before he grabs it, slipping it back onto his finger.

if @bbbby-blu didn't decide to send me a damn picture, we would have not been here today combating the writing slump. all credit to blu for the "take it off for me" - we thank you for your service <3

#john price smut #john price #john price x reader #john price x reader smut #captain john price smut #captain john price #captain john price x reader #john price cod #captain price #captain price x reader

[strwberri-milk]

consider: literally everyone knows he's trying to win your favor EXCEPT you. it's so obvious. you're just oblivious and make excuses for anything people bring up to you about how he really does want to be with you, until he outright says it to you, and you're the embodiment of the surprised pikachu meme.

i may or may not be projecting. /lh

perhaps with diluc, childe, kayea, alhaitham, and kaveh? and a male reader if that's alright 💛

hope you're well!!!! drink some water!!!

Diluc/Al Haitham thought he was clear enough. He's made several comments about how he enjoys spending time with you and that he really enjoys your company. Hell, he spends half of his time at events when you're invited as well looking for you, then the other half staying with you.

It all comes to a head one day when he decides to ask you bluntly if there was a reason why you were ignoring him. He had no idea if it was because you simply were not interested in him or something else but when you start trying to evade the subject he realises that there's something else there. He's not sure how to broach the topic but considering how you try to avoid it he decides to just leave it.

It only takes you a few days to decide to try and talk to him again. You tell him what people have said and make an offhanded comment about how he wouldn't ever like someone like you which prompts him to immediately disagree and tell you that he is very much so interested in you. The shock on your face makes him rethink his words, worried that you misunderstood him. He confesses his feelings for you again, much more clearly this time and you still continue to look shocked.

When you tell him it's because you had no idea truly that he liked you he sighs. He tells you how he thought it was obvious with the way he acted, you having to tell him that you had no idea. He continues to tell you more, smiling a little at how you truly had no idea how he felt about you.

Childe decides to just go for it when he hears from someone else that you still didn't know that he's interested in you. You don't know what to do when one day, Childe simply appears in front of you and tells you point blank that he wants to ask you out, romantically. He's decided that since you haven't caught onto any other hints he's going to leave absolutely no room for you to doubt him.

This simply gives you even more room to simply raise your brow and ask him if he's thinking clearly. He tells you he is and that he wouldn't joke around like this and that he's dead serious. No matter how much you try to fight him on this matter he continues reiterating that he likes you and wants you to give him a chance. He only backs down if he thinks that he's making you uncomfortable, waiting for you to respond.

You decide that it would do you good to believe him, even if it seems too good to be true. To you, even the chance to be with him is better than nothing. He teases you further down the line when you confess that it took you several dates to actually believe that he did like you, holding you tightly and kissing your cheek affectionately.

Kaeya knows that a lot of people see him as just a flirt so he's not surprised when you behave in a way that makes it clear you don't see his intentions as they truly are. He wants to make you melt and call you his but he can't yet. He decides it'd be best to confess to you in private, wanting to do it in a way that perfectly encapsulates how he feels about you.

The confusion on your face just confuses him, Kaeya unsure if he just didn't make it clear enough. He tries again, telling you in other words how he feels and making it known that he really is trying to genuinely ask you out. You tell him that he must be joking and you're finding it difficult to believe, Kaeya telling you that no, he's serious and he really does want to be with you.

He decides to go all in, pulling you in and gently asking if you're okay with him kissing you to prove it. You nod dumbly, not expecting him to actually do it. When you feel him press his lips against yours gently, almost as though asking for permission again you simply melt into his arms. You feel him smile into the kiss, pulling you tighter against him as he whispers another confession into your mouth.

Kaveh loses his mind a little at how oblivious you are. He can't fathom how you haven't pieced it together yet, feeling as though he has been incredibly obvious about the way he feels about you. It ends with a slightly heated confrontation, you knowing that it's just because when Kaveh feels, he feels with all of him.

He asks you why you've been ignoring the clear signs that he wants to ask you out, not believing you when you tell him that you thought you simply were misreading his signs. He rolls his eyes at how silly that sounds, telling you that he wasn't trying to misguide you or anything. He means it right now when he tells you that he likes you and he was being very clear with his signs whenever he's around you.

This leads to you re-evaluating practically every interaction you've ever had with him, slowly figuring out that he's right - there's really no other way you could read them. He laughs a little, affectionately exhausted at all the metaphorical hoops he had to jump through to get you to understand. You're still a little lost, Kaveh continuing to explain that he's serious and this isn't a prank.

#genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #kaeya x reader #kaeya alberich x reader #kaveh x reader #diluc x reader #diluc ragnvindr x reader #al haitham x reader

[emperor-kumquat]

Fandom, WTF

It's not just X; it could happen here too. My fucking god, a Transformers YouTuber almost did the unspeakable last night because of cyberbullying. Because people who claim they are being heroic are doing such terrible things. And they do it so damn fast.

(The YouTuber is more stable and safe at the moment)

You don't need to know the exact details, but the person made a post on X that was a little iffy. Not discriminatory to anyone, not an inappropriate picture or anything. The kind of thing that SHOULD have led to a discussion to change his opinion. And that's what the some other YouTubers and I did, we talked to him, and he regretted his words and changed his mind. Just like that. So fucking easy.

He wanted to write an apology and tell everyone he understood the issue now, but he was struggling to. His account was reported and suspended over and over. In the end, he did manage to write that apology on X and tell people he changed his opinion. That kind of thing can happen when we act patiently and try to guide people! But before then, other people were DMing him madly on Discord and X to say horrible shit, show gore, tell him to die. People were photoshopping a convicted criminal's face onto his profile pic. Friends severed ties without even talking to him. People doxxed him and someone left him a threatening phone call.

These people probably loved the excuse to do it. They would happily slap a label on someone then act dramatic about it. They pile on the hate because "that creator deserves it", they think.

How can you do any of the above and think you are a good person??

What on Earth happened to giving people the benefit of the doubt? Out of all the ways a statement could be interpreted, why do people choose the most negative instead of the most positive? When drama hits and your friend is involved, how can you leave without at least hearing the other side of the story? How can you forget that you may be harassing someone who has mental health or is neurodivergent?

It's like people love being mad. They want to put a bad label on someone, like some kind of "_ist", "_phobe", or a "p*do". They don't need much evidence before attacking. Here on Tumblr a while back, some people very eagerly wanted to harass me. They called me transphobic. The reality they didn't care to find out: I am trans, I make trans activist videos, I go on the front lines countering anti-trans protests in Canada while getting screamed at by conservatives for hours. Get real. If you are so quick to hate someone and label them, you were probably just eager to misinterpret anything they said to get a chance to be angry. You don't know them and you are not a sensible, fair person. They act like a pack of wolves if they can tell themselves it's justified. It is NOT justified. They should be ashamed. They are just bullies hiding behind a hero’s mask.

#transformers

[matrixbearer2024]

hello! i’m the anonymous that mentioned the thirst tweets 😭 i saw that you asked for people to send you ideas so i wrote some definitely did not watch several videos of celebs reacting to their thirst tweets i wrote a couple with a specific character but i figured id let you choose the character for the tweet :)

imagine getting paid to kiss vox, i’d do that shit for free

the sluttiest thing men can do is be ___

i’d let lucifer in his demon form break my back like a glowstick ANYDAY

vox with is sleeves rolled up vox with his sleeves rolled up vox with his sleeves rolled up vox with is sleeves rolled up vox with his sleeves rolled up vox with his sleeves rolled up vox is like 99% sure y/n wrote this one

my body is a temple and i want ___ to bust the walls

i desperately need ___ to smash my skull between their thighs

___ just popped up on my screen and it took all my self discipline to not kick the screen

just watched hazbin hotel.. i have inappropriate things to say about ___

i would let ___ rearrange my guts in alphabetical order any day

___ ass is a gift from god himself 🙏

i want lucifer to hit my g spot so hard that my moans are louder than his high note in “more than anything”

please don’t mind if there are any typos you obviously don’t have to use all of these but i’d thought i’d give you some different options ❤️ also LOVE YOUR WORK YOURE AMAZING

A/N: This is a bit of a long one compared to the others- Also, thanks for giving me choices but I'm definitely using a lot of them HAHAHAHA

Actor AU: Thirst Tweet Edition

(Y/N): *Is handed a glass bowl filled with paper strips* "Oh that's a bowl- seriously?? How many of these are there?"

*The producers off screen say something*

Lucifer: "A couple?? Woaaah-"

Vox: "Oh damn, I can't wait to see what the internet thinks of us."

Alastor: "Are any of these going to be censored?"

*The producers off screen say something again*

Alastor: "None?? WELL THEN-"

(Y/N): "This person says: 'Imagine getting paid to kiss Vox, I'd do that shit for free!'"

Vox: *Trying not to laugh* "Imagine trying to kiss an overheating computer monitor, that's how it feels like dear fans."

(Y/N): "I mean, when we film it's not that bad but hey- to each their own."

Lucifer: "Wait wait look at this: 'The sluttiest thing a man can do is obsess over their rival who went missing for seven years'. Oh this is a callout that's what that is-"

Vox: *Can't even respond coherently he just falls into a fit of laughter*

Alastor: "And they say my character is the creepy one! Seriously?!"

Adam: "You both play creepy characters- anyway, this one says: 'I'd let Lucifer in his demon form break my back like a glow stick any day.' YO THAT WAS A HARD FUCKING LEFT LET'S BE REAL FOR A MINUTE-"

Vox: *Folded over and just laughing uncontrollably*

Alastor: *About to start laughing as well but trying not to and pointing to Vox* "I'm gonna start laughing if this idiot doesn't stop I swear to god-"

Lucifer: "That escalated really quickly oh WOW-"

(Y/N): "VOX- STOP LAUGHING-"

Adam: "Dude we literally JUST started!"

Alastor: *Trying to distract himself and not become a laughing mess* "This one is just a copypaste of: 'Vox with his sleeves rolled up'. (Y/N) are you sure you didn't write this?"

(Y/N): "HUUUUH??? WHY DO YOU THINK IT'S ME??"

Alastor: "Because it's you???"

Vox: *That does not help him stop laughing*

Lute: "Okay- my turn! This one says: 'My body is a temple and I need Alastor to bust down the walls'. People are really down bad for a radio deer and a bipedal TV-"

(Y/N): "THAT SHIT IS ACCURATE! LIKE REALLY ACCURATE!"

Vox: *He's clutching his side because it's sore from him laughing too much* "Okay okay! Let me try! I wanna see what the people say! Oh goodness this one: 'I desperately need Lute to smash my head between their thighs'. Excuse me but BITCH WHAT THIGHS?"

Lute: *Playfully and repeatedly smacks Vox*

Adam: "He's not wrong though! These people are craaaazy-" *Laughs as Lute smacks him too*

(Y/N): "Yooo! there's one about me! '(Y/N) just popped up on my screen and it took all my self-discipline to not kick the screen'. I can't tell if that's good or bad-"

Vox: *WhEeEzE*

Lucifer: "Depending on who you ask it could either be aggressive affection or people just don't like your character much."

Alastor: "Which is hilariously odd because people really like mine??? What goes on in the heads of our fans??"

(Y/N): "Bleh- oh wait look at this one: 'Just watched Hazbin hotel, I have inappropriate things to say about Saint Peter'. SERIOUSLY???"

Lucifer: "Oh my god people's corruption kinks-"

Alastor: "That's craaaazy-"

Adam: "I can't wait to tell him about this!" *Laughs*

Lute: "Give me another one! Hmm- 'I would let Alastor rearrange my guts in alphabetical order any day'. Canonically he could- you would just die afterwards-"

Alastor: "Yeah I don't think my character would be entirely opposed to that. In the innuendo sense though? Oh boy."

(Y/N): "Yooo this one! 'Adam's ass is a gift from god himself' praying hands emoji- CANON LORE MOMENT?"

Adam: "IT'S CANON! IT'S SO CANON-"

Lute: *Laughing like crazy*

Vox: "Oh this one isn't any better- 'I want Lucifer to hit my g-spot so hard that my moans are louder than his high note in: "More Than Anything"'. Well, we stan a short king."

Lucifer: "That has got to be the most creative thing that's come out of that depraved batch of comments so FAR."

Alastor: "Wait wait- there's a last one. It says: 'I need to kiss Vox until he can't breathe'. Okay (Y/N) you're up-"

(Y/N): "OH FUCK OFF AL-" *Laughs*

#vox x reader #hazbin hotel #vox #get off my screen series #hazbin hotel vox #vox x you #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin vox #hazbin vox x reader #hazbin hotel vox x reader #actor au

[chessiecc]

König being around smaller operative.

Not König ignoring your ass the first time you're in his unit. Not really viewing you as anyone different, special, or yet a pain in ass.

The only reason you got put on his radar was because you were shorter than him and went into his blind spot when he turned around. He was usually hyper aware of who was around him in a room, what they were doing, and where they were going to need to be. But you scurried in without a sound and threw him off completely. 

You had scared the shit out of him.

He caught you harshly by the arm before you fell, but afterwards scolded you for not paying attention to where he was. "That was not smart. If I was equipment, you could have been seriously injured.”

After your first encounter (and set of pushups), you ran into each other three to four more times. He thought you didn't get the point of being aware of your surroundings the first time and would smoke you constantly afterwards. 

"If you can't look up to see me standing or walking, how will you see a sniper coming after your team?"

"Do you run into walls as much as you do me?"

"For someone so small, you are in fact durable."

At the end of the day, it wasn't as though you didn't see him. It's just that the man moved too quickly around a corner and you only saw his equipment before it was too late. You would stop and try to dodge, but he would keep on walking and get you.

Apart from you running into him, he did hit you with the back of a rifle, a mug, whacked you with his glow sticks... several times, and has back handed you on various occasions from swinging his arm backward to give everyone hand signs. 

He also tried to move a broom and has literally swept you off your feet. Thinking he just knocked something over until he goes to check the sound of what may have fallen.

Also, when you have tried to scurry off duty by him, there have been occasions he has got your hair caught in his equipment, pulled it, and kept walking not even noticing he was dragging you until a body hit him.

He started finding your situation amusing / concerning and started using it as an excuse to not be around larger groups of people. He wasn't opposed to talking to them, but since he kept running into your disorganized ass... why not spend some time with you and occupy himself in other ways.

Nothing romantic, he just couldn't keep still and you were becoming entertaining to him in your encounters when you did not see him around a corner.

This Colonel has checked in multiple times with your team on how you are in the field and found out that though you are clusterfuck in the barracks and out, it tends to work for you when you're out... and are around flammable materials.

You were the team's tracker / hunter and was a damn good one if they were to say anything about it. (This would probably explain why you were so quiet when walking and would be so close to people when getting by unnoticed. Problem was, you were too good around taller people and since you did not see any of the taller people in your unit as an impending problem you would linger too long in their blind spot before being trampled.)

Nonetheless, he would try to train you more. That way you would be more predictable to him and you essentially became his mini me. (However, it turned more into him being the black cat in the relationship and you being the orange cat.)

---

When you first started to prevent getting in trouble with König, you would jump up or away for the first few times and freakingly go to salute him. Looking like you just heard the sound of 20 bombs go off on 80 soon to be dismembered bodies.

You would be tempted to make jokes and snap back, but the command in his voice would warrant a rain check.

At some point, depending on how aware he was when you were around and what he would say and do after would be a good indicator of his mood.

After you got over the interactions more, you would say things like

“Heh heh heh *cackle* You missed me.”

“I can see why you're not a sniper.”

“I didn’t think they put a new rack of equipment there? Looks like it missed me that time.”

Of course, you would salute first before saying these things, but still would get smoked for these afterwards since it was not an appropriate way to address a colonial and you still almost ran into him — again. But he was laughing under the mask while doing it and you learned to accept your fate.

---

König tries to take things slower around you, as you have too many random bursts of energy and may hurt yourself… or him if he is also rambunctious around you.

The only time he may commit to his own chaos is if you are seevveeraal arms lengths away. 

He instead waits for you to be rambunctious. (This method seems to distract his anxiety enough over time that he gets very comfortable around you as a monitor and Colonial.)

He has also gotten better about getting out into social situations. As whenever you two are walking together, you tend to say greetings to people you know or try to get an itinerary from people to get others prepared in your unit to save time by prior planning. (Your foresight is something he gets encouraged by for you to stay and flourish in your position) 

He gets indirectly introduced to people and seeing you tend to keep the conversation on track and predictable, social situations end up being more enjoyable with you more than by himself or with anyone else. 

He starts creating situations that would call for you to be an icebreaker with him more and more until you're tied to the hip semi-naturally.

---

When in a room with König while training you tend to sit up high on top of the vending machines or mats to make your presence known. At first, he ignored you since you were staying out of the way and wouldn’t care if you disappeared from the spot in the beginning.

However, as you have run into each other more, if he does not see you in your usuals spots he will start to panic and move very slowly until you are located within the crowd of soldiers.

There have been a few occasions, he has had everyone line up in specific areas so he can keep a path clear for him and relocate you.

However, this system has failed him a few times and he has ended up getting aggravated and setting you, personally, above mat stacks and vending machines himself, telling you not to get down unless someone has brought you back to the floor.

You decided to be an ass one time and responded in German (only words you knew he wanted to hear from you from when you were being smoked). He decided that would be how you respond from now on.

---

If you guys haven't seen each other because of being on a mission, it would start to become tradition for you two to bicker and revert to old dynamics between you to. 

You: “What don’t give me that long face. I missed you so much, I just wanted to give you a return hug.”

König: "Wow, you manage to duck under the sniper bullets and live. Looks like I have trained you well."

You: "Well damn, I can see that China’s missing there wall"

König: "They said I couldn’t be a sniper."

---

One time, you tied bells to your uniform, so he could hear you from afar. He immediately told you to take them off and that was not combat appropriate. But after you two kept running into each other, you tied them to him and he started laughing. (At this point if someone had a problem with you, he would handle the smoking endeavor and since you decided to bring bells into the mixture. The sessions intentionally had the objects involved at times.)

Another time, you peaked around the corner before walking around it cause you thought you felt his weight through the floor or his booming voice around the corner laughing at something someone had said.

He flicked your head after seeing you in the reflection of a nearby object and made you act it out as a sniper getting you. He made you go to a funeral with your team and afterwards made you all sleep in separate one inch propped open caskets.

When König was monitoring you guys, he learned you were not only an idiot walking around corners, but also when you move in your sleep.

---

One day, he overheard you talking with another operative as you were preparing to go back to work out of the mess hall about how you are 'not short' and that you are in fact average height. Everyone else was just overgrown. Your theory was that people of a taller stature needed people who were shorter to grab things in small crevices and get into holes to clear them, meanwhile smaller people didn't need any help from another person, and when needing help could just grab a stool.

"Taller people are not needed, they are wanted."

"They are the defective height and too overgrown for society, but since there are so many of them we have to accommodate. Otherwise shorter people are superior—"

*Thump*

Guess who you ran into?

I feel like if he were pissed or feeling sadistic, there would be little to an extreme amount of humor with this man at that moment. Seeing he does not want to run into people and deal with a concussion. He would definitely throw you into a hole after that and tease / barrage you into how short you could be. Only letting you out once you asked for help. He might continue on occasions by putting you in various situations to show your body type weakness in an attempt to cut out your complex. Not too intensely or too bullylike, but enough to highlight to you, you were "short" and needed to watch your shit.

If he was in a good mood, he would just laugh and mumble something in German before giving you some form of leniency. Later, if he or another person were smoking you for being in people’s blind spot, he will have you do an extra set of workouts just to keep his points far and consistent. (not as many as he would usually have you do for it though)

About two months after your shorter, taller argument, you got a vehicle stuck in the mud and could not get it out. He laughed and was an asshole demanding that you do something about it. He was meaning it in fun, but he made himself come off authoritative.

But after an hour of you seeing you were too small and would not be able to get it out, you yelled at him for not helping, being impractical, and making it worse by sitting in the vehicle. You also told him that if he was not a Colonel and would take off his rank right then and there, you would fight him (but we are totally gonna ignore that, right?). He single handedly moved it himself after that.

He wanted to get the move on, but still wanted to teach you a lesson to cut your shit. However, learning that did not work but made your eight foot one shadow come out to play, he decided it was best to motivate your energy elsewhere.

---

Sometime in your time being an operative around him, he was put on a case with you where you were working on hunting down a war criminal.

There was an instance in the mission when he was lecturing you on the aircraft about your performance in the field and how you were not to go into holes without giving everyone enough prep time to be prepared to back you up in case something happened while you were in there.

This occurred after a spur of the moment transition from you to clear a tunnel area. You thought you were doing the natural clear cut thing to do, but apparently you should have given more warning and paused for everyone to settle in. (NOTE: you WERE NOT used to working with that many people up close!)

Anyways, you guys hit turbulence and he was heavy enough that he didn’t go anywhere. You on the other hand went flying. He saw it coming and caught you, planting you firmly and passive aggressively in the seat next to where he was sitting.

Seeing handing you something heavy to hold or put on your back while you could help everyone strap down the contraband on the aircraft would create possibly two flying projectiles, your Colonel ended up forcing you to strap in as everyone else handled the cargo or confiscated contraband.

For the rest of the plane ride, he was fuming.

---

He has gotten very impressed by how destructive you are in the field and will let you off your leash when needed. Otherwise you are on his hip and are not to move unless directed.

---

For Christmas, you got the higher ups a small object each catered to a theme about them (if you knew them well enough). After all, it did not seem like a lot had family to celebrate with and it seemed like a small gesture that would not overstep too many boundaries... 

But for König, you also got him and you a tracking bracelet. That would show where your positions at any given time. The bracelets would also vibrate if you got within a certain proximity to each other.

He thought this was really fun and clever, but most importantly a breach of security if worn inside the facility.

After considering all the ways he could mess around with you with it. He decided to smoke you again when you got back from leave.

The oversized teddy bear still put it on and wore it. Afterall, he was a little worried about giving you a concussion. 

---

After a while he does not smoke you as much and just gives you disappointed dad sighs or grumbles. As if you have really done something he knows smoking won’t fix.

Instead, he will just lift you onto a tall object and walk away letting your complex take over from there... 

---

Just please keep your temper in and don’t throw anything at his helmet.

#konig headcanons #cod #call of duty #mw2 #konig x reader #konig mw2 #konig cod #konig call of duty #cod mw #cod mw2 #modern warfare #cod konig #konig smut

[yan-lorkai]

Maybe plat!soft!Yan Riddle hcs with a shy, timid and skittish mouse beastman darling in the same form as him?

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ A/N: This is so cute 🥺. When I first saw the gameplays, bcz the game is not available on my country, Riddle was my favorite character and writing this remind me why. Hope you like it, anonie!

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Warnings: Platonic yandere, stalking, toxic friendship, humiliation, mutilation threats, slightly dezumaning.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Maybe Ignyhide, maybe Savanaclaw. You guessed, trying to think what kind of dorm would be best for someone like you, so quiet, so shy, avoiding looking at people as you stand in front of the mirror and await your fate. Your ears moving involuntarily as the seconds pass and the mirror echoes: Heartslabyu.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Heartslabyu. The Queen of Hearts' dorm. A dorm in which there are few beastsmen, a dorm in which everyone seems to look at you and your mouse ears or tail move, uncomfortable with the attention.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Life in this dorm is restless and several times a day, you often find yourself hiding from Riddle Rosehearts, your dorm leader, who seems to find pleasure in teasing you and offering you headpats (It's his favorite excuse to pet your ears). And truly you can't get mad at him for that, Riddle has those sparkles in his eyes whenever he can touch your soft ears or hear you squeak in surprise. And really this is better than be collared like your others classmates and friends.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ You catch his attention and only because of this fact do you become friends. Maybe you're good playing croquette or have an easy time dealing with the flamingos and hedgehogs, maybe it was your laugh or the delicate way you paint the roses red. Thing is, as soon as you catch his attention, Riddle starts investigating everything he can about you. Your likes, your dislikes, favorite food, etc.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ You and Riddle have a strange friendship - if you can call whatever that is a friendship, of course. Mainly pre overblot Riddle who likes to punish you in a different way when you get one of the rules wrong; he sentences you to spend the whole day by his side, it would almost seem like a normal date between friends if he didn't threaten to cut off your tail if you leave him even for an instant.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ And you, fearful and shy, give in, not wanting to find out if this is all a bluff or something real. Even more so when he could do worse than that, locking you in a cage and treating you like his little mouse. One for only him to see and care for.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Pre overblot Riddle has high expectations for everyone, but they're even higher when it comes to you. He wants you to always have the best grades, to always behave well, to participate in the same club as him and to have respectable friends who don't influence you wrongly. He acts towards you like his mother acts towards him. And it's terrible and suffocating, and you can't do anything but listen to him if you want to keep your ears and tail in place, no one would believe he threatened you in any way. He respectable, the example of what an exemplary student should be.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Riddle likes to put you in the spotlight when you don't listen to him. Do you want to run away from him so much? Do you wish so much that he wasn't around? Okay, then he won't be there for you, not even to help you when you freeze on stage and the audience just keeps staring at you, laughing, whispering about you and your failed attempt of speech. Plus he will still be there to ask you several questions, questions that he knows you don't know the answer to.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Your panicked expression is something he treasures after all.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Post overblot Riddle is genuinely softer, listening to everything you have to say and apologizing for everything he caused you, for the fear, the humiliation and the punishments. If you wish, as tradition demands, he will even bow to you as a sign of respect. He bow till his face is touching the floor, if that's what you want.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Post overblot Riddle knows he hurt you, he knows you haven't completely forgiven him for what he did and he's more than willing to rectify his mistakes. He doesn't know how to do that yet so he asks Trey for advice and he's trying every day to regain your trust somehow.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ He start small: handing you a cup of tea early in the morning, sharing his notes with you, helping you overcome your shyness and how to you express yourself more, letting you get away with it if you break any rules and protecting you from possible bullies who like to make fun of you because of your mousey features.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Forgive him or not, Riddle will not leave your life. He is determined to be your friend and your friend he will be one way or another.

#twisted wonderland #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere riddle #yandere riddle rosehearts #yandere riddle x reader #twst riddle #riddle rosehearts #riddle x reader #riddle x mc #riddle x yuu #tw yandere

[stevieharringtonwifeguy]

yknow we do a lot of like stevie realising she's transfem bc of a dare or like robin telling her about queer stuff and having a 'you can do that?' moment, but now im thinking of stevie who figures it out entirely on her own and doesn't know how to tell anyone. like she doesn't fully have the words and even with robin it's like. one thing to be gay but gender stuff is a whole other level and she has no idea where she stands on that

but like, stevie who used to play with his mothers makeup as a child, whose parents would laugh at his antics until he got too old to be so childish, time to act like a Real Boy. and every time he's supposed to act like One Of The Boys he thinks of how it felt when his mom would do his hair for him and comment on how alike they looked, and how much better that felt, and he knows that isn't normal, and he has to be normal

but after the upside down that really seems to matter less. nothings fucking normal anymore, why should steve be? so she starts branching out a little. breaks into her mothers closet again, tries on all the clothes she left behind when she went on her latest trip. slowly amasses a decent collection of makeup by going to several different stores over the course of months with the excuse of 'oh my mom/girlfriend sent me to pick up x'. she doesn't do the Whole Deal often, in case nancy comes over or later in case the kids suddenly ask her to drive them somewhere. doesn't do anything that can't be removed in like three seconds. and she's definitely never telling anyone about this. she doesn't know anyone who would understand.

after starcourt, she wonders about telling robin sometimes. like sure, stevie doesn't like men but she's still like. some kind of queer. robins the only other queer person she knows (and yeah, robin turning her down bc she was only into girls did sort of hurt, but it wasn't robins fault bc she didn't know, and also it turned out stevie just didn't understand what actual friendship felt like so it was for the best anyway), so if she can't tell robin who can she tell?

but something always stops her. robins technically never done anything that makes stevie think she'd be mean about it, but there's something like imposter syndrome keeping her mouth closed. like she's not the right kind of queer. like robins being queer the good and honest way and stevies just being some kind of freak. and yeah, she knows it's dumb to think like that and robin would call her a dingus if she said it out loud, but it sits pretty heavy in her heart

so it's not until after vecna, when stevies on the eddie shift in the hospital and eddie says, while high on possibly every drug in the world, 'man i spent all that time trying to grow my tits and bats ate an entire boob in under five minutes' and stevie goes ??? what???? and eddie, still too high to self-censor, makes some comment like yeah they weren't huge but that black market estrogen i got was finally working its magic, definitely had like an a-cup. rest in peace. and stevies like why were you growing boobs?? 'bc girls are supposed to have boobs, man, keep up'

and eddie passes out again like five seconds later, but stevie just sits there watching her snore with her heart about to beat out of her chest because. holy shit. she's not the only one. eddie might understand, might be able to help her, if she was able to grow her own boobs. stevie would love to grow her own boobs. she'd stuffed some socks down a bra once and they looked lumpy as hell but even just the suggestion of a bust had almost brought her to tears.

and suddenly, looking at the sleeping form of the first person stevie has ever met that she's ever had this so intrinsic thing in common with, everything doesn't seem so scary

#steddie #transfem steve harrington #transfem eddie munson #platonic stobin #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #t4t steddie

[cuubism]

I have been absolutely loving Bookstore Cryptid Dream! Offline life got rough for a bit there, but this little universe never failed to make my heart happy. Thank you - and I hope you're planning on more!

i've indeed had one in my drafts so i finished it up for you :)

--

Hob has been waiting with equal parts anticipation and trepidation to find out exactly what ideas Dream will pull from his romance novels. He still hasn't figured out why he picked romance novels as his manuals. Maybe he needs his sex positions to have narratives. Maybe he's into roleplay. God.

But Hob doesn't get to find out.

He's been busy for a few days--new term at the local uni starting up means the cafe's suddenly gotten busier--and while Dream's popped in and out a few times, they haven't had the chance to spend much time together. It's probably good, Hob tries to convince himself. Puts the brakes on things, just a little.

But when he finally gets a break, hands the reins over to his staff for an evening, he heads to The Library. Even if Dream is busy with his own tasks, Hob's content to just sit in his space. Listen to his stories. It's not something the busy cafe environment usually allows, but The Library is like an alternate world, cool, quiet, and timeless.

Hob strides up the steps and opens The Library door.

And there's nothing inside.

It takes several moments for his tired brain to comprehend what he's looking at, and several more for him to decide that no, he's not dreaming. He steps through the doorway into a dim, empty room, old wood-paneled walls and dust gathering in the corners, and no infinite winding paths of shelves like in Dream's bookshop. Just a shell.

Hob presses his palm to the wall. It's cool, and smooth, and very much real. Not some mad hallucination of his, this empty room.

Blinking hard, Hob steps back outside, closes the door again, as if that might change things. Opens it again. Same room. Does it again. Same room. He calls out into the empty bowels of the once-Library: "Dream!"

No answer, of course.

Hob had known that The Library had a sort of magic to it. But just vanishing into thin air...

And Dream wouldn't...

...would he?

Hob spins in place on the stoop, looking out on the darkened street which suddenly feels so much more eerie. He steps down to the road in a daze, looking around as if The Library might suddenly appear in another doorway. Resists the urge to yell Dream's name into the darkness.

And then, well, fuck it. "Dream!" he calls. All that echoes back to him is his own voice.

Hob sits down on the stoop, defeated. If he hadn't seen Dream just yesterday, kissed him on his way out of the cafe not twenty-four hours ago, he really might have started to think he'd hallucinated all of this. Invented someone he'd wanted to know.

But he didn't invent Dream, he swears he didn't--so then where is he?

Hob doesn't sleep much that night. He doesn't do much of anything else, either--it's not like Dream left a note to track him down, or any evidence of his existence. It's not like Hob can put up missing person posters: have you seen this bookshop? Or force it to reappear.

He's having a very sleep-deprived, very over-caffeinated morning shift in the cafe, contemplating how long one's not-quite-human not-quite-boyfriend needs to be not-quite-missing before it's reasonable to start finding out which parts of London harbor demons and sorcerers--when a man he's never seen before stops at the counter, hands folded before him, and says, "Excuse me, but do you know if there's a bookshop around here?"

Hob has never seen anyone else ever go into The Library or even acknowledge its existence, and Hob's anxiety is so high that he almost leaps over the counter to grab this man by the collar and demand, what do you know about Dream?! Fortunately he belays that impulse. This stranger really does look almost laughably harmless and definitely not like a demon or sorcerer, not that Hob's seen one--and getting arrested for assault is not going to help anything.

"I tried the door," continues the stranger, as Hob just keeps staring at him, conflicted, "only, well. It seems to have vanished."

Well, at least Hob's not hallucinating. Not that a disappearing bookstore is helpful to his sanity.

After what was surely a conspicuously long silence, though his visitor just waits patiently, Hob says, "Have... you been there before?" He feels weirdly defensive of The Library, even if it's currently AWOL. He doesn't know if he wants random people to be able to find Dream.

Or maybe that's just jealousy.

"Oh, no, this is my first time coming this way," says the man, apologetically. "I'm just looking for a certain book."

Damn odd timing for it.

Hob comes out from behind the counter and waves him over to a table. He should probably get some tea. Proper hospitality and all. But he's too worked up and way too sleep-deprived.

His guest sits down primly at the table as Hob slouches against the back of his own seat. "Sorry," Hob finally says, "if I'm--" he waves a vague hand. "Dream's had trouble before, that's all." He holds out his hand to his guest. "Hob."

The man shakes his hand. "Hm. A pleasure. I am Aziraphale. To any associate of--" he tastes the name, "Dream's, that is."

It's interesting that The Library's reputation carries further than knowledge of Dream himself, despite how deeply Dream seems to be tied to the shop.

"Is it meant to be there, then?" asks Aziraphale hopefully. "I wouldn't blame him for moving around to protect the collection; I certainly wouldn't want all and sundry picking through the shelves!" He shudders. "Though I was hoping to find that book."

Hob doesn't bother asking what book. Whatever it is, Dream will certainly have it. What's more important is--

"'Moving around?' Do you know how?" And then, realizing if he wants a chance at info he's going to need to offer some of his own, adds, "You just missed him, it's only today that The Library's been... gone."

"Oh, dear," says Aziraphale, now looking troubled.

"Not sure what pointed you towards this place, but if you've heard anything..." Hob continues, "Dream is my--" what is Dream, anyway? They haven't established it, "...friend."

Looking contemplative, Aziraphale says, "Well it is odd timing, now that you mention it, because--"

That's when the door to The Library flies open.

A lanky man comes hurtling down the steps, limbs akimbo, yelling something over his shoulder that Hob can't hear from within the cafe. "Oh dear," says Aziraphale again, with a mix of concern and consternation. "Crowley!"

Dream storms out of the doorway next, expression thunderous, his hair sticking up in all directions like he'd been struck by lightning. That has Hob lurching to his feet, which Aziraphale does as well, and they both rush outside, just in time to hear--

"Look, it's just one silly book, okay?" The unfamiliar man--Crowley, presumably--says, stopping in the middle of the road and turning towards Dream. "Don't overreact."

Dream is, in fact, clutching a singular heavy book, and looks like he's just about to hurl it, except that Dream would never do something so undignified as that, Hob thinks.

Dream hurls the book at Crowley.

Or not.

Crowley catches it against his chest, stumbling back with the weight. "I do not accept," spits Dream, each word the strike of a nail, "surreptitious rummaging in my library."

"Oh come on," says Crowley, tossing the book to Aziraphale, who's just caught up to him and who catches it with a surprised little umph! sound. Crowley makes a shooing sort of go on, run gesture to Aziraphale, which he doesn't heed. "It's not like I was going to burn the place down. You're just prejudiced against demons."

"I am prejudiced against thieves," hisses Dream. Hob finally reaches his side before he can throw another book or something, lays a hand on Dream's arm. Though all he's really thinking is, demons?!

"Crowley," Aziraphale admonishes. "Please tell me you did not." He finally looks at the cover of the book, and gasps. "Crowley."

Crowley shrugs. "You wanted it, he had it."

Hob frowns, confused. "You don't need to steal from The Library. It's not a museum. Just go in and buy it." Not that Hob's ever actually paid for any of Dream's books.

Both Crowley and Aziraphale turn to him. "One could not simply give away such an artifact," says Aziraphale, caressing the book's leatherbound cover.

"Least not for a steep price," says Crowley, which evidently justifies his trying to swipe it. "I won't be beholden to the likes of you." He points at Dream.

Dream looks affronted. "Now who is prejudiced?"

"Let's back up," Hob says, unsure how he became the voice of reason here. He still has a hand wrapped around Dream's arm, it's grounding after the way Dream had just vanished on him. "What happened? Dream-- I tried to come over and you were just gone." The empty room past The Library doorway is going to continue to be nightmare fuel.

Dream makes an apologetic little sound. "I apologize. I closed all access to The Library for its protection. As it turned out, my assessment of the threat was overstated." He glares at Crowley and adds, darkly, "I thought you were from the school board. Breaking in in the dead of night like so."

Hob momentarily gets stuck on the fact that Dream considers the local school board a greater threat than an actual demon from hell.

"Which," Dream continues, "was utterly unnecessary. You could have simply come to The Library as a visitor and sought out what you were looking for. It would have been granted."

"Oh, so I was just supposed to know you actually sell your books?"

"The books will find their rightful recipients," Dream says stiffly.

"Crowley, you have been very rude," says Aziraphale, though he hasn't given up the book, "I think you should apologize."

"Eh," says Crowley, waving this off. Hob supposes it wouldn't really be given to demons to apologize for things. "You apologize if you really want to."

Aziraphale turns to Dream with a sigh. "I am sorry for my companion's behavior. And... grateful for the book."

Dream nods solemnly at him. It seems his ire does not extend to Aziraphale.

Crowley leans back on his heels, closer to Aziraphale. "Mayyybee we should go now."

Aziraphale nods. "Quite." He tips his head at Dream, and then at Hob. "Thank you for your hospitality, Hob."

Then he turns and hurries away, Crowley slinking along beside him. As they leave, Hob hears Aziraphale admonish, "Do you know how few booksellers there are with truly rare volumes? We cannot afford to make such enemies."

"Yeah, you're welcome, angel."

"...Thank you."

Hob shakes his head in bemusement and turns back to Dream. He takes both of Dream's arms in his hands now, holding onto him, looking him over. Unable to fully vanish the lingering panic of The Library just being gone. "Are you alright? I was... worried. When you disappeared."

"I am annoyed," Dream huffs, like it's a greater point of suffering than any actual injury. Then he leans in close to Hob, pressing a hand to his chest. "I apologize. I did not intend to cause you distress. I had to shut the doors rather quickly, but I hoped to resolve the issue before you had cause to visit The Library."

"It's alright, love. I'm just glad you're okay." He kisses Dream, tentative for how new this all still is. Tastes lightning on his lips. Dream hums with pleasure.

When they pull apart, Hob wraps an arm around Dream's back, starts leading him back towards the cafe, or perhaps just to Hob's flat above. Tea solves everything. "So. The school board, eh?"

Dream sighs with the weight of the world on his shoulders. "They are enthusiastic about banning books."

Hob pulls him against his side, kisses his temple. "Dream against the world."

Dream grumbles, but leans his head on Hob's shoulder, and despite the many strange things of today Hob is going to have to internalize, he feels all soft inside at the gesture.

"Don't worry," he says, "next time your many enemies come calling, just yell and I'll create a diversion."

"And be waiting with tea after I've dealt with them?"

"Got it in one."

As they reach the door to the cafe, Dream turns his head to kiss Hob's shoulder. "You are good to me, Hob Gadling."

And Hob will keep being so. Even when the next strange thing happens.

#hob: yep. same shit as always #idk in what type school boards do or don't exist in the uk maybe that's just an american thing #also realized i never named Hob's cafe lol. i guess now it's just called The Cafe. like The Library #fitting for a man who named his tavern The New Inn #bookstore cryptid dream #my writing #dreamling #dream of the endless #hob gadling #ask #lunaris1013 #good omens #crowley #aziraphale

[suzukiblu]

WIP excerpt for Marina; obligatory sugar baby Kon. ( + non-chrono link for mobile. )

“Um . . . right,” Suzie says quietly, and . . . well, he just thought it: she's a secret herself. 

Tim definitely needs to just take over whatever neighborhood he buys Kon a cul-de-sac in. Or maybe just, like, the entire tri-state area. Get Suzie a little place of her own, maybe, with an actual living space in it. She doesn't have physical needs like the rest of them do, no, but that doesn't mean she shouldn't have anything. Like–he doesn't know, whatever girls like. Stuffed animals and her own TV and a place to keep, uh . . . okay, Suzie doesn't need batarangs or a place to store smoke pellets and caltrops or grappling lines or work on her equipment or anything like that, but still. It's, he doesn't know–the principle of the thing, or something. 

He's gonna have to work on his trust fund budget a little, maybe. Ridiculous as it is, buying an entire tri-state area would definitely put a significant dent in it. 

“Suzie,” he says. “Are you . . . alright here? When the rest of us aren't around?” 

“Yes?” Suzie says, looking confused again. That was probably an unfair question on his part, Tim thinks. It's not like she really knows what he means by “alright”.  

Kon didn't either, after all. 

“I mean–it's not too lonely?” he asks. 

“Oh,” Suzie says, then bites her lip. “Um . . . I mean . . . I'm fine, yes! You don't need to worry about me!” 

Maybe this is a Bat thing, but absolutely nothing has ever worried Tim more than hearing “you don't need to worry about me” from someone. 

“Okay,” he lies, and smiles at her. “But you know you can call us if you want to make plans sometime, right? You don't always have to just wait for us to show up.” 

Suzie looks at him for a long moment, then–well, she doesn't turn pink, exactly, since that would require blood and veins and actual skin instead of smoke, smoke, and more smoke, but he's pretty sure she blushes all the same. 

“Oh,” she says. “Um–right! Yes. Yeah. Yes.” 

Tim smiles at her again, trying to be–he doesn’t know, reassuring, maybe. Something to the effect, at least. 

“Good,” he says. “It’s good for the team to spend time together outside of emergency situations, anyway. We can’t only hang out during crisises and expect to work well together, you know? So it’d be helpful to have an extra excuse to, really.” 

“Right!” Suzie says, beaming at him, which hopefully means that implying she’d be doing something good for the team by asking for attention when she feels isolated or lonely worked. 

Tim really doesn’t know why he didn’t think more about her living situation before this, but to be fair, he also thought about literally no one’s living situation before Kon just casually announced that he lived in an ethically-dubious cloning lab that wasn’t paying him, so . . . yeah.

Definite oversight. Definitely a thing to pay more attention to in the future. Just–definitely. 

Several kinds of definitely.

#marina #wip: obligatory sugar baby kon

[foolishlovers]

hiii!!! do u have any recs for long AUs??? thank you! :]

of course, i love long good omens AUs, here are some of my favourites:

[you can request more fic recs here.]

Golden Handcuffs by seekwill (E, 70k) Far from any city, near the Scottish coast, Tadfield College has a celebrated history, an unrivaled academic reputation, and two departments at war. When the Biology and English departments are forced to share a building, Senior Lecturer and botanist Anthony Crowley finds himself drawn into the orbit of the polite but strange English professor, Dr. Aziraphale Fell. As the new term begins, two academics navigate the politics of both their offices and academia, and try to solve the puzzle of one another.

Fifty-Two Blue by bendycello (M, 84k) It would be a gross understatement to say that Crowley simply didn't like Aziraphale. He was posh and stuffy and arrogant, and Crowley couldn't figure out why everyone else in the program liked him so much. It hardly mattered; they were competitors, and Crowley didn't need to make friends to become a surgeon. It takes several unleasant encounters, the excessive use of house plants as a coping mechanism, and getting stuck in an elevator for Crowley to start reconsidering his priorities. Or… Crowley and Aziraphale are surgical interns with competitive streaks a mile wide each, and they really do not like each other at all. Until they do.

Waking Up Slow by the_moonmoth (E, 87k) “Then you’ll just have to come back with me," Aziraphale said. “You what?” “You’ll have to come and isolate with me, at my cottage.” The thing about messing with people, Crowley thought, was that sometimes, they genuinely surprised you. After both being exposed to coronavirus, total strangers Crowley and Aziraphale are forced to wait out their isolation together. A tale of soft winter romance by the sea.

Slow Show by mia_ugly (E, 95k) In which temptations are accomplished, grand romantic gestures are made, and two ineffable co-stars only take four seasons of an award-winning television program to realize they’re on their own side (at last, at last.)

Car Trouble by summerofspock (E, 102k) Aziraphale's car breaks down so he takes it to the first mechanic he can find. From there, his mundane life changes drastically as he finds himself befriending the man fixing his car.

on the same page by Chekhov (E, 117k) Aziraphale Z. Fell is a rising star of the spiritual literary genre - the next Eat Pray Love guy - and his version of Chicken Soup For the Christian Soul is flying off the shelves. It's not that he's not grateful, but it's one thing to enjoy a career in writing and another completely to be pigeonholed into a specific genre, so much so that you are almost forbidden from writing anything else. So yes, maybe he has a bit of a secret. An outlet for his less… appropriate urges. And yes, if his typical readership got word of the sort of paragraphs he could put out on a particularly inspired night, they might suffer some form of heart attack typical for their age. But all of that is well hidden, and there is absolutely no way anyone would ever find out about his Arrangement with A.J. Crowley - the most debaucherous romantic fiction author of the decade. That is… until they have to pretend to be married to each other.

Married at First Sight by Aracloptia (T, 146k) “Well, that was a thing,” Crowley said once they were out of earshot. Without talking about it, they were both heading down the field, towards the lake where the photographer (and likely a few more people from the TV crew) was waiting. “That was a wedding,” Aziraphale replied, surprised at his own annoyance that somebody called a wedding a ‘thing’. “Yeah, obviously, didn’t miss that part,” Crowley said with a shrug, and waved abruptly in Aziraphale’s general direction. “Neither did you, from the looks of it, since you’re dressed like a wedding bride and everything.” “Excuse me, I am a—“ Aziraphale stopped himself, and started over. In which Aziraphale ends up marrying a rude stranger who wears sunglasses.

Old Vines by sevdrag (E, 189k) A.Z. Fell, one of the most respected names in wine and food blogging, has been sent on assignment with his assistant Warlock Dowling to spend six months in California Wine Country. Under direction (by his boss, Gabriel) to use this experience to double his blog followers and write a novel, Aziraphale is both excited and anxious about the opportunity. Anthony J. Crowley is the owner and viticulturalist of Ecdyses, a winery that unexpectedly fell into his lap eleven years ago when he hit rock bottom. He may be in debt, yeah, but he’s paying off his loans — and despite pressure from his lenders and their team of inspectors, Crowley has found a kind of contentment tending his little corner of terroir and producing extraordinary wine. Crowley’s old vines are the heart of his vineyard, and he’s never let anyone in. Crowley finds Aziraphale intriguing; Aziraphale finds Crowley enthralling. Turns out a famous wine expert and an experienced viticulturalist can still learn things from each other. The summer of 2019 unfolds.

What We Make of It (Shotgun Wedding) by charlottemadison (E, 213k) The important thing, Crowley tells himself -- the most important thing -- is Adam, his brilliant, creative, empathetic nephew. Being fourteen's hard enough; the kid didn't ask to deal with the weight of the world on top of it. And if taking care of Adam means Crowley has to tough it out at a job he can’t stand, so be it. And if Crowley's job means that Adam’s charming English teacher is NOT a romantic possibility, well, that's just how things go. But the occasional drink with Aziraphale proves hard to resist. They frequent the same pub, so who can object to them saying hello? Briefly sharing a table? Perhaps a little conversation? The painful knowledge that it can’t be anything more -- not without somebody getting fired or sued or both -- well, that can't be helped. Until Crowley stumbles onto a terribly reckless idea…

#you've come to the right place #i love nothing more than immersing myself in a really long good omens fic shshhs #if anyone has some recs for me PLS go ahead and send them!! #good omens #good omens human au #good omens fanfic #good omens fic #aziraphale x crowley #aziracrow #aziracrow fic #good omens fic rec #foolish recs #go fic masterpost