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the-pan-ace-writings · 1 year

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Prologue

Mind Over Badger

hello!

This is the beginning of what will hopefully be a series. I have tried my best to plan this out so it doesn't seem like it's wandering. It's very likely that if youre reading this that I have several if not all chapters written. That being said I would love input and will potentially change the trajectory of this fic. This is very much going to be about family and while I'm not the biggest romance writer ideally I'd like to write in soap ghost badger?

I will try my very best to keep the description of badger racially ambiguous, especially since I ended up writing in he/ him pronouns. I feel like we dont get alot of male reader fiction and I would like to add to that.

And finally I would like to preface that I do intend on just following Badger hopefully in a third person perspective but I suppose we'll see how that goes as I write.

Thank you so much and please enjoy this prologue. And if anyone had better title ideas let me know! <3

First Next Masterlist AO3

Kate Laswell and Captain John Price sat in a quiet corner of a café, other customers paid them no mind as they softly bickered.

Laswell leaned forwards trying to emphasize her point in an attempt to keep Price from walking away. “Zakhaev wants Barkov’s throne” It caught his attention, turning back into settling in his seat and set his hands in front of him.

“I almost buried him in Pripyat… with MacMillan”

Laswell shook her head, a small frown steeling her face. “That was the Father. This is the son, ‘Victor’.”

“Lovely Family.”

“They Are big fans of Hadir’s.”

“Well that would explain why he’s still alive.”

“They're going to get him out.”

Price leaned forwards face almost giddy as he knows this is his in

“Then give me what I need…”

Laswell stared and his face completely unreadable although bordering on exasperation as she dropped her hands down to the table with forgotten drinks and onto the file folder that contained the personnel files that Price had requested from General Shepherd. She shoved the file across the table and leaned back into her chair as she watched him almost smugly remove the files and smile.

She let out a sigh and leaned back towards him as he started looking through the collection.

“Who's your crew?”

Price grabbed the bottom file, lifting it up to inspect for a second before placing it down on the table for Laswell to see. A picture of a young man in basic fatigues and with close cropped hair, he had a slight smile just ghosting his face.

“Sergeant Garrick.”

“Kyle?”

“They call him “Gaz”. He never said anything”

He pulled another. The picture on the file was of a stockier man, with broad shoulders also dressed in fatigues. His hair was cut into a mohawk which just barely had to be within regs. A scar broke though just under his lip but didn't interfere with his closed lip smile.

“Sergeant John MacTavish, SAS. Sniper- Demolitions. Goes by “Soap”

“Why”

“That's classified” he smirked

Price chuckled and pulled another file to the top, an unfamiliar name to Laswell was read over. It was of a man bigger than the last, again in the same fatigues this one notably crisper around the collar, there was no smile on his face. His nose was crooked slightly and a scar ran over the bridge. His hair was pulled back and braided tightly and intricately into what likely led to a bun, he had a beard that was neatly trimmed into regulation length. He looked like a stern man.

“He goes by “Badger”, His sister “Otter” dubbed him couldn't figure out why, close combat specialist”

The last file Price tossed down onto the table, it was missing a picture.

“There he is…Simon Riley”

“There’s no picture”

“Never”

Price picked up the files again tucking them away. He leaned over with a cheeky smile egging Laswell into getting her approval.

“Now the rest. That's need to know.m Unless we got a deal”\

She shook her head before letting up

“What are you calling this task force?”

“1-4-1.”

First Next Masterlist AO3

#soapghost #soap x ghost #taskforce 141 #call of duty #cod mw 2022 #mw2 2022 #captain price #john price #kate laswell #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #john soap mctavish x reader #ghost x reader #ghost x male reader #John soap MacTavish x male reader

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hermannco · 1 year

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I loved the designs you did for cane and able in codotverse, reminds me of wendell and wild from the new stop motion movie!

what inspos went behind your designs if you are okay with telling

I've had those designs stashed for years

if anything Wendell and Wild GOT INSPIRED BY ME!!!! /j

Lmao thank you

I'm about to info dump and dont take anything I say as Canon, this is me hyperfxating and having LITERALLY too much information in my brain about to random ass motherfuckers.

Okay so, fun things. About Inspo.

ABOUT CAIN: Normal Cain. Soft, grandpa man.

2008 Cain. (From a HoM comic I am not too fond of except...)

Fucking sharp lunatic with his hair going EVERYWHERE. Constantly UNHINGED.

And so I decided to strike right on the middle bcs I always enjoyed the idea of this motherfucker flipping like a switch, also because he is an older brother, and he cleans the house and does the crops and tells stories and helps with the animals and maintains the house, and is fuzzy and very classic focused. But you know, he will also murder Abel in a split second and he gets a JOY doing it. Most of the time. But also enough to live with him normally and still have dinners and get mad when someone else hurts him.

His front hair flop also comes from the fact that he has to hide the "MARK OF CAIN" TM. The one that hits you 7 times worse if you hurt him. He has no control of what that shit does tho.

Also fun fact, the houses are located in Kentucky (Unless they are teleporting) and stuck in the 70s aesthetically LMAO.

So I sharpened the old man, still gave him kind eyes. I unbrokened his nose, because is impossible to break it without you dying, so this man is SURPRISINGLY DELICATE when it comes to fights.

A well groomed beard that can be easily messed up. And big CAINines.

The clothes are just classic Cain clothes but pushin a little bit more of the military ww1 aesthetic he is placed with.

The long and short, Grandpa please go to bed.

ABOUT ABEL:

Younger frisky freer brother.

A lot of Abel is based of Harveydont's Abel work. In all honestly we both worked on these bozos over the years.

Regardless here is the explanation for his look at least on my end.

He has always been a fancy little lad, a lot more pristine than his brother. A lot of the thought behind Abel is how he does a lot less of heavy work such as gardening or house renovating, but does things such as cooking and sweeping and organizing. Which is why he can always afford to be dressed to the nines.

Always seems to dress BETTER and be well more mannered. But while nicer he is also a trickster. So He can't be a circle.

Anyway, this picture also has done its millage.

This is the ORIGINAL sketch for Abel by Joe Orlando. I think my man nailed it first try. There has been A LOT of Cains over the years, but Abel always... ALWAYS relatively looks like this. And I have NO ROOM to complain.

As you can visibly see he hasn't changed much... I just put a knife to him and sharpened his features, as well give him bigger eyes than Cain bcs 1) makes him also look unhinged 2) Can also look more innocent.

Also his mutton chops are cleaner, in general his look is more put together and softer. He is supposed to be PRISTINE. The ring on his hand is because CANNONICALLY, Abel wears the gayest shit in the comics and I something he could fiddle with when nervous. (Mesh shirt while cooking, you know, gay club look just while cooking, iconic. Speak your truth, king.)

Also I made their skin darker bcs I am tan to darker color and I Was like, lol I can't be stopped now!

I hope this helps.

#anonymous #MITHOM #the noir art #noir talks #cain and abel

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reficu1 · 1 year

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hello i was wondering if i could get matched up (harry potter, male character)

im a girl, my prefered pronouns are she/they, INTP 9w1. the house i would be in is ravenclaw.

im filipino and chinese. im 5’2 and my skin is like a medium-light tone. i have black hair with curtain bangs and it goes a bit past my shoulder. i have brown eyes, theyre not dark but not light either, and i wear glasses that tend to stay at the tip of my nose. for my style, i wear a lot of sweaters or jackets, cropped shirts, and jeans with either converse or docs. i prefer dark, muted, or neutral tones over brighter colors. my style is kinda like the downtown girl aesthetic.

things i enjoy are reading, listening to music, playing video games, watching movies, and studying. my favorite books are schoolgirl by dazai osamu and our happy time by gong jiyeong. i dont read as much as i did before, but i do it here and there. ive been really interested in japanese literature and also manga, though, and ive always loved the works of dazai osamu and junji ito. i listen to music almost all the time since it sort of blocks out everything when it gets too loud. i wear my headphones even if im not listening to music since simply having it there kind of comforts me (i also have really bad sensory issues since im autistic. its not only with hearing but all of my senses in general). i listen to a variety of artists, but my favorites are laufey, mitski, lamp, tyler the creator, and childish gambino. besides listening to music, i also play the piano. i play a lot of video games, but its mainly genshin and osu, but i love horror and mystery games. its similar with movies, i love horror and psychological horror, mystery, and action. studying is what i enjoy the most even if it sounds odd. i love learning new things especially if its something im interested in.

personality-wise, im a very quiet and calm person, but im also very observant. i dont talk to a lot of people, but when i find someone interesting, i’ll most likely talk to them first. it also takes me a while to grow comfortable towards people depending on how they are. but once i get comfortable with someone, i become more talkative. i go on and on about what i find interesting and my passions. im also a good listener and im willing to listen to people ramble to me as much as i do to them. im open with my friends venting to me and i tend to only listen since im not the best at comforting people, but if they need it, then id try my best to comfort them. i have a really difficult time expressing emotions. i wouldnt call myself emotionless, i feel a lot of emotions to the point where it can be overwhelming for me sometimes, but expressing them it very awkward for me. im intelligent and i love all kinds of science (its my hyperfixation), but i despise english and history. im not bad at either of them, i just dont find them at all interesting.

just random facts abt me: i have the worst memory its actually concerning, im the youngest in my family i have two older siblings (a sister who im extremely close with and a brother), i love animals especially cats, i love the sky and i always take pictures of it.

(also dont know if this was necessary but just wanted to add it: stargazing, cafe, museum, park/flower garden, or study/library (except we wouldnt get anything done and we’re just in our own world) dates are my fav and my love language is acts of service!)

SORRY IF THIS WAS TOO MUCH HAHA but thank you so so much if you actually respond to this! i hope you have a wonderful day/night!

I match up for you...

Ron Weasley. And I'm talking about Ron from the book, because in the film he is shown as a coward, stupid, weak and only likes to eat. But in the original, Ron is quite smart, he has a lot of "beyond expectations". Yes, he lacks perseverance. Ron has a strategic mind, if you remember his interest in chess. But damn, his game didn’t end with a checkmate, it was a check and the enemy could be blocked by a queen_._._ Your love of reading and studying didn’t bother him, he would probably sit next to you and listen to you if you want to discuss something, otherwise as he has many older siblings, he has a lot of experience that they passed on to him. But because of them, he would be less likely to express his thoughts or knowledge. Ron is very insecure, due to the fact that his mother always set only the older ones as an example, and Ron is the only younger one. But every year the guy learned from his mistakes and admitted them! This is a wonderful quality in people, it helps us to improve ourselves.

#harry potter x reader #harry potter match up #harry potter matchups #harry potter #ron weasley #ron weasly x reader #ron wealsey x y/n

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ofmdee · 11 months

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some sims questions!?!?!!

thank u for the tag @eulaliasims 💜 im gonna do these for ts4 unless it's specified

1. What’s your favourite sims death? Omg. Ummm, is it cheating to say old age? I like the satisfaction of knowing i got that sim thru LIFE. But cardiac explosion is also a good one.

2. Alpha CC or Maxis Match? for ts4, def mostly maxis match, but i'm not like, super strict? something looks good i download it 😂 which is a problem.

3. Do you cheat when your sims gain weight? no??? i did take away sim ed's massive bulging muscles he got from too many autonomous workouts once, tho.

4. Do you use move objects? it is Always on

5. Favorite mod? probably MCCC. it does So Much.

6. First expansion/game/stuff pack you got? Livin' large!!!! 😂

7. Do you pronounce “live mode” like aLIVE or LIVing? LIVING for real i never even considered ALIVE was even an option until recently

8. Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made? well, i don't really make sims too often these days, i usually play sims born in game? i mean i obv favor my ofmd sims, but i didn't actually MAKE their bases, they're from the gallery, just heavily made over. from my ts2 days tho i rly liked val.

9. Have you made a simself? oh yeeeee, many times! my most recent one moved in w my gfs selfsim

10. What sim traits do you give yourself? Realistically: Cat lover, loner, socially awkward, erratic, and lazy 😅

11. Which is your favorite EA hair color? ummmm i guess one of the pinks? idk it depends! never rly thought about it.

12. Favorite EA hair? bro idk

13. Favorite life stage? idk young adult i guess????

14. Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay? Both babeeeey. And story telling. And gif making. I use sims for a lot of stuff!

15. Are you a CC creator? I used to be (old ts2 content), but now i basically only make stuff for personal use for specific sims 😂

16. Do you have any simblr friends/a sim squad? i think? def friends and friendly acquaintances, not rly a SQUAD so to speak, but i've made friends with a lot of ppl on simblr that i'm friendly with outside of simblr now.

17. What’s your favorite game? (1, 2, 3, or 4) 2, despite not having played it in years.

18. Do you have any sims merch? just the games 😂

19. Do you have a YouTube for sims? nooo. i have a twitter 🔞, tho ;)

20. How has your “sim style” changed throughout your years of playing? in ts2 it was very grunge/neon, and that's harder to find for ts4, imho, and i rly miss that! so i guess my ts4 style is less..... alternative? which is a bummer tbh.

21. What’s your Origin ID? i share jessy's, lol, and also i 🏴‍☠️ ts4 anymore so i don't even remember tbh

22. Who’s your favorite CC creator? Buuuuuhhh i cannot choose just one! anyone who never paywalls their stuff, how about that? ;)

23. How long have you had a simblr? since like 2010 lol, this blog only for a few months, tho.

24. How do you edit your pictures? Photoshop! if they're for tumblr i crop them to 800x500, use this psd (that i've edited slightly by adding some vibrance) and then finish it with a super old sharpening action of pooklet's 😂 if i'm making gifs or graphics i switch up psds/etc but that's my go-to editing technique.

25. What expansion/game/stuff pack do you want next? i dont want ANY more fuckin sims 4 packs i am so sick of updating my game just let it DIE. tbh.

26. What expansion/game/stuff pack is your favorite so far? god idek, there are like 239483209483209 dlcs for ts4, it's hard to pick an overall fav. 🤣

if you wanna do this and haven't done it yet, here is your tag!

#xoxod #sims

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softlyspector · 2 years

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I wanted to tell you how obsessed I am with the ‘then and now’ fic and I wanted to know if u could do something like a Pinterest board of outfits and rings for Blue, I really love her as a character and I’d love to have that mental inspo If it was possible. You should be super proud of yourself because you’re an amazing writer!!! Have a nice day whenever u read this! 😘😘

first of all! thank you so much! im really glad you enjoyed the fic! second, thank you for asking! i love these kinds of questions - i dont have specific pictures of outfits blue would wear but she's first and foremost a comfort girlie

her day to day consists of jeans and boots and band tees, oversized plain t-shirts, flannels, crop tops. she doesn't pay attention to trends and dresses pretty much the same each day. some days she'll swap the boots for sneakers. if its a particularly hot day, she goes for cropped tanks and cut offs. if she needs a jacket its a leather one that she inherited from some long dead family member, or an army green lightweight parka. she's very practical

blue has a collection of hats that she's never purchased but stolen from all the guys over the years which she wears to annoy them occasionally. she always has her rings on - stackable gold ones. of course santi's ring is the standout against the rest (gold with blue gems). besides the rings she doesn't wear any other jewelry

her rings (i imagine her with many many more than this):

santi’s ring probably looks something like this:

#bec talks #then and now #triple frontier

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sacredjake · 5 months

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Dec 6th

🎁Hiiiiii💚

Awww your cats 🐱 💖 I love when people are cat lovers! The last of us (I only think Pedro Pascal is 🔥 in the show, anything else no thanks…it’s a hot take I know lol) , game of thrones, bridgerton and the witcher (Henry Cavill🔥) are my favorites too.

And Ooo those pictures of Jake 😮‍💨 *sighs* that man… Ok back to the questions:

You said you’re from Texas, have you ever been to a fair? The fairs close to my city are just ok. I love the deep fried Oreos though!

How tall are you? Do you wish you were taller or shorter?

How would you describe your clothing style/aesthetic?

Lastly….

What gvf masterclass videos brought you the most joy?

🎁💚🎁💚🎁💚🎁

Your Secret Santa 🎄

i enjoy pedro very much in the last of us too lol aside from his looks i think he plays joel very well and i also just love joel’s character. so sad henry wont be geralt anymore though :(

jake is so <3333

i have been to the fair! i grew up right outside of dallas, so our schools would get free tickets for the students. id like to go as an adult to enjoy it more bc we couldn’t really afford the rides and food when i was younger. plus now i can drink lol. big tex is really fucking huge btw, it’s kinda terrifying. i also went to a small fair in my college town in oklahoma which was fun! ummm my senior year of high school they took us to a renaissance fair and that was cool as fuck, i wish i appreciated it more back then but of course i was caught up in high school bs lol

i’m 5’2, almost 5’3. i wish i was a little taller, just like 5’5 or 5’6 maybe. mainly bc i cant even reach the top shelves in my own home and thats annoying lol

oh boy i don’t even know. clothing wise, im all about comfort unless im going out. i would wear leggings and a crewneck everywhere or nike shorts and an oversized shirt if it was acceptable. white low top converse are my everyday shoe. i dont think i really have a clothing specific style honestly. lots of skinny and flare jeans, boots and cute crop tops with jackets for going out. as for aesthetic… hmmm its a mix of things. whimsigoth, dark academia, kinda cottagecore… idk i dont really stick to a certain aesthetic, i kinda just do whatever (aquarius rising for you lol) but i think those best represent me atm

hmmm honestly they all brought me joy. they were all funny in their own way. i guess the blooper reel since they’re all in it if that counts lol

#gvf secret santa #secret santa🎄

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worstloki · 3 years

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Top Forty Thor-Being-Thor Moments from Thor 1

just absolute dumb*ssery that this 7yr old kid’s life goal is to “hunt down the monsters and slay them all”. I’ll go easy on him here and let the Thor/Loki expressions do the talking because of “...just like you did Father” but seriously can his hands even fit around a sword handle??? this kid isn’t even punching the air right??? if there was a sword in his hand he would’ve cut his head with the way he’s moving???? pure tiny-himbo energy here just look at that >:o face he’s making. contrasts very nicely with Loki’s ‘,:|. 10/10. such a baby idiot.

“the jotuns must pay for what they have done! they broke into the weapons vault! if the frost giants had stolen even one of these relics!” thor. thor please. can you even name one of these relics. thor. hey thor. thor. shut up. “well, what would you do about this?” odin asks him. “march into jotunheim! like you once did! break their spirits! so they’ll never try anything like this again!” wow okay so we’ve fast-forwarded by like a thousand years and thor is still going on about genocide. huh. that’s funny, i thought loki was the genocidal one. hmm. i also just realized that the loki exclusive clip gives loki the same hairstyle thor has here so do what you will with that information.

0/10. horrible. terrible. i dont care how angy thor is about not getting to kill some jotuns or become king today this very instant, that is a tremendous waste of food. an absolute fool. how can he just remorselessly throw the bread to the floor. if loki stabbed him when he was 7 he would deserve it for this table flip alone. what a privileged white *ssh*le.

loki came skulking around a corner and suggested not to go to jotunheim and not only did thor not suspect anything but he also then went on to decide to go to jotunheim. 10/10 himbo material.

if tumblr didn’t have a picture limit i would put every instance of thor smiling in this list because look at that stupid smile. he’s such an idiot. 11/10. this is the thor content i’m here for.

“I have no plans to die today” thor says with the stupidest open-mouthed smirking smile ever captured on film. right after he also told heimdall not to tell anyone they’re gone. he’s literally planned to strand them on jotunheim. thor’s grand plan was to strange themselves on jotunheim and also start a fight. i repeat: thor’s plan was to successfully slay all the frost giants and not need to return until they’re all gone. what an absolute d*mb*ss. this is getting ridiculous. this was originally a top-ten-thor moments list but i’m not even twenty minutes in so i’ll have to extend the list. thor. thor are you listening? thor, you’re such an idiot.

“HOW DID YOUR PEOPLE GET INTO ASGARD?!” thor you sweet sweet summer idiot, please, i am beggin,g you,, learn to rea,d , a room,, literally everyone else who came with you is regretting it, there is complete silence and only the rumble of the opposing king is meeting your “I AM THOR, SON OF ODIN”s, please, please take some notes from Loki, or, you know, literally anyone else in the room, since everyone is asking you to get out of this realm while you still can,

thor’s stupid smile makes an appearance after he gets called a princess and decides to fight a whole realm over it. you know what? thor is a princess. he’s the prettiest princess in all the lands. what’s thor gonna do about it? is he going to fight me too? I hope he does the stupid grin first. minus 15 points for the sexism. thor is a complete and utter sadistic fool who needs to get a hobby. seriously, he’s 1500 years old and still going on and on about slaying all the frost giants. boi, i hate to break it to you, but your dad is not the best or only example of greatness out there. i don’t think your dad even qualifies as an example of that.

“THEN. GO!” 🥰 ahh yes, just thor thingz 🥰🥰 like when one friend has had his arm burnt 🥰 and another friend has been impaled and needs medical attention, 🥰🥰 and all the rest of your friends are yelling for you, 🥰 and your brother is telling you they must go, 🥰 and you decide to buy everyone time by laughing maniacally and killing more frosties because you care for them and dont find joy in destruction like a loon 🥰🥰🥰

THIS is the iconic Thor moment that makes my day whenever I think about it. Just Thor, an absolute bumbering 6′6′’ giant boodlusting dummy sees Odin and just decides to yell “FATHAA!! WE’LL FINISH THEM TOGETHAAA!” as if the last thing Odin told him wasn’t “no, thor, we’re not going to do anything to the frost giants, do not go after them and try to kill them all.” 11/10 d*mb*assery right here folks, I couldn’t ask for Thor to be more of a fool. This is PEAK Thor energy. Look at that face. I feel like Thor spends half this movie with his nostrils flared. I love it.

okay i gotta give thor credit for rightfully calling odin “an old man and a fool” but also there was not even 1 frame of the scene where Thor had a decent face so now all i see is >:O >:| >:o >:[ when i watch that scene. yelling at odin was great, not yelling at odin after he HUAERGHed at loki was less great, but to be fair it’s thor and he is the definition of Peak D*mb*ss.

thor literally GROWLS and starts yelling “HAMMAA?? HAMMER??” over and over. He was hit by a van, he fainted, he woke up and started growling. I don’t know what else there is to say about this.

“you dare threaten me? puny human?”. so. uhh. basically. Thor knew she was threatening him? He KNEW she had a weapon? instead he made a face and started yelling as he tried to walk his way closer????? thor you complete and utter dum dum. you frickin hairball-for-brains. im not even surprised darcy tasered him. with that kind of face, i’d taser him too.

when you wake up in an unknown place to a person smiling at you without a stupid smile, the first step is always to attack first and ask questions later 😌😌😌 (but seriously thor you imbecile why didn’t you ask where you were instead of throwing multiple people around the room and getting your butt needled. you clueless buffoon. you’ll remain a clueless buffoon if you don’t listen to anyone.)

just a quick recap but thor was knocked unconscious by a van and these people kidnapped him aboard and the next scene we see him in he’s checking himself out in mirror after presumably changing right there in the open?????? these are the things that make thor thor. any other character and i’d question it so much, but this is thor, and i truly believe this is in-character for him. just change in the open because why not? thor is a beefcake and that’s his only redeeming quality and he knows it. 10/10 thor moment.

I am now convinced that Thor saw Jane and “5k van-hitter to lover slow-burn height-difference himbo-scientist trope” flashed through his mind.

“but no more smashing!” Jane says, and then Thor proceeds to check her out and smile unlike an idiot and like a douche. was this his version of flirting???? i’m not one to decide, but yes, yes it was. He threw a cup to the ground and broke it, and she’s getting mad at him and berating him about it, and he’s liking it. y’all i’m sorry to break it to you like this, but thor has a canon fetish. i am so, so sorry.

im DYING. THAT ISN’T EVEN A KISS, HIS MOUTH IS OPEN. he SMUSHES his mouth around her knuckle???? WHY. I can’t keep noticing things like this. send help. please. Jane’s response makes so much more sense now; she’s laughs for a solid 3 seconds and shakes her head and is like “uhh, thank you? ahaha,” and then she keeps looking back longingly when walking away. they are doing this in PLAIN sight of EVERYONE. Darcy and Erik are standing RIGHT THERE, and Thor is doing weird things to her with his mouth. I’m out. I am done here. goodbye.

return of the stupid smile AND the douche smile in quick succession through the entire trip. their entire dialogue is peppered with innuendo. “I’ve never done anything like this before. have you ever done anything like this before?” “many times, but you are brave to do it.” “I have nothing else to lose.” “ah but you are clever, far more clever than anyone else on this realm.” “realm? rEaLm?” “you think me strange?” “yes” “good strange or bad strange?” “I haven’t decided yet.” I AM DYING OVER THIS. plus, we get Return Of The Himbo with Jane asking after Einstein Rosen bridges and Thor is like “uh, actually, more like a rainbow bridge 😜🤪” i feel so sorry for jane here, didn’t know how much of a d*mb*ss Thor was when signing up for this van-trip and knuckle-sucking 😭😭😭 i also no longer have questions about how the trip that SHOULD HAVE BEEN A HALF-HOUR ONE turned into one that LASTED TILL THE SUN WENT FROM THE MIDDLE OF THE SKY TO SETTING by the time they arrived. I have no questions. please. I don’t want to know what they were doing in that van. please no. don’t make me think about it.

thor’s plan had 3 steps and they were 1. give jane his jacket 2. walk in and get his hammer 3. fly out. that was literally his plan. he had the first “I have a plan. attack.” moment in the MCU. pure concentrated 0-brain-cells energy right here. how can you not stan this king of d*mb*ssery. look at him, flaunting his big boy muscles. he’s about get his hammer and fly out, like he just told jane with a trademark stupid-smile.

crop-top hair-mop thor is my favourite thor. the way the entire fight scene parallels a hamster in a maze only exemplifies the thor vibes for some inexplicable reason.

“you’re big. fought bigger.” + Thor douche-smile + subtext from earlier + rolling around passionately in the mud = not a happy me.

I swear i’m not making up this romantic subtext but it’s barely even subtext. the entire scene leading up to Thor’s attempt at lifting the hammer is actually filmed erotically. I’m not kidding. First there’s a shot where Thor pulls aside a hamster-cage-wall blind which mirrors a shower-curtain, and THEN he walks around the hammer while smiling douche-ly at it, we get a few close-ups to his face which are shot from angles slightly lower than himself, giving him an aire of superiority, plus the music adds to this, he reaches out for the hammer’s handle with a mud-covered arm in the rain, in non-slow-motion slow-motion, and he wraps his arm around it, like, he fully twists his arm, unecessarily sexually, around it as he grabs the hammer. This is not okay. On the plus side, it makes the movie much more entertaining,, on the down side,,.

im not going to call Thor dumb for not knowing he’s not worthy. im not going to. because odin literally whispered the enchantment to mjolnir after he’d thrown thor to midgard. it is very funny watching thor grunt in frustration though. he starts yelling because he couldn’t lift the hammer and just lets himself get caught. like, dude, get a life, go buy a new weapon from the store, seriously. he mourns for the hammer on-screen longer than he does for loki. he also looks like he’s in far more pain here. he becomes catatonic and unresponsive after this, but when loki dies he’s already feasting the same afternoon. 10/10 dum dum thor material. never change thor, never change. (that’s code for please change, thor, please,)

thor trying to establish dominance wherever he goes is the funniest thing because at this point he’s being a complete asgardian *ss about it and it’s reaching points of pettiness never seen before. side note: he is possibly flirting with selvig too. maybe. i’m not saying anything happened, but Thor’s openning lines when bringing him home carried over his shoulder are “he’s fine, not injured at all,” followed with an apology to selvig, and an explanation to jane which consisted only of “we drank, we fought, he made his ancestors proud,” and then he puts the man to bed and before he falls asleep erik says “i still don’t believe you’re the g*d of th*nder, but you ought to be,” so... your choice, i guess...

thor’s got his trademark stupid smile and stupidly takes jane’s life’s work notebook and starts doodling in it about trees. the last time his father told him this story about Yggdrasil was when he was 5 and he clearly hasn’t payed attention to any lesson about anything since and it shows so so much. thank you thor. very insightful knowledge you’re passing on hear. ‘i come from a world where [science and magic] are one and the same,’ ok great, now elaborate on that please. oh, right, you can’t because you’re thor, my bad, 20/10 thor behaviour. he couldn’t even doodle nicely. all his lines are wobbly. epic art fail. i wouldn’t trust him near my sketchbook with a 2B pencil.

THIS is thor’s realization face. in case anyone was interested in what ‘dawning truth’ looked like on him. 😰😪 THIS is the face of a thinker, of a man betrayed by his own beloved brother for unprecedented reasons. look at the nuance in his expression. 😩😩😩 so many emotions, I can’t even count them all 😩💯😪

stupid smile and “do not worry my friends, i have a plan,” he says, “i’ll just try and abuse the fact that Loki’s super selfless and kind and has no self worth to my benefit as i have countless times before which is exactly what he’s rightfully angry about this time,” he doesn’t think to himself because that is NOT the smile of someone who is thinking... like, at all. +10000 points to gryffinthor. the d*mb*ssery really jumps out.

“im sorry bro for whatever i did and whatever you’re blaming me for as an excuse to do this, im sorry bro, but you’re disturbing innocents that i don’t really care about but you’re the one making a scene in front of them so why don’t you admit you won’t kill me and are just having a temper tantrum and we move on? hmm?” and then he proceeds to get slam dunked in the face with a metal arm like yEAAAA BOI that’s what you GET for going up against the SENTIENT LAVA-SPEWING metal-man ya absolute dunderhead clod. thunderhead clod? yeah, that. he’s just so dumb, your honour, please, you must understand, the victim pleads guilty on all charges of d*mb*ss and d*mb*ss alone.

I can NOT describe the emotions I feel knowing that Thor is suck-kissing Jane’s knuckles. Like, his mouth is literally jelly-ing it up against her hand. There is suction there and it shows when he is placing and removing his mouth. I promise that’s what is happening. I’m not any happier than you about this. I regret everything. This is why Loki should be what is focused on and not Thor; Thor’s going around trying to frick frack everything in sight even if it’s just Jane’s hand. He’s maintaining eye contact with Jane while he licks her fingers. Why did I decide to rewatch this movie.

i’m only adding this in as a thor moment because of how desperately and badly they kiss. seriously. 2/10 kiss. im not surprised jane broke up with him. they look like two actual seals fighting over an actual grape. while i’m here i’m going to criticize every fic ever that decided thor is an experienced gentle lover. what were y’all on when watching this movie. thor can and will f*ck literally everything in sight and he won’t even do it well because he is the peakest of peak d*m d*m. look at this man. look at his face. that is the face of an absolute himbo idiot, and it’s the face of an absolute himbo idiot who knows it. he’s been stranded on earth for 2 days, max, and his flirt-count is at 69 people because his name is one letter away from thot. i bet his terrible use of a pen from early means he writes his ‘r’s like ‘t’s and he doesn’t even care. 1000/10 thor moment. doesn’t get much more romance-thor than two individuals smooshing their faces together after some finger sucking. that finger sucking is gonna leave jane simping for years. and that’s true love babey. <3

“I’ll handle my Brother!” Thor says, as if Loki didn’t send a metal-murder-bot that quite virtually killed him less than ten minutes ago asdfhkhsdgsdjf Thor, you horrific himbo you, Loki’s weapon of choice is literally throwing knives he will literally kill you before you enter the room if he’s on his game and wants you dead which he just proved he would do and you’re just gonna???????????? jog on over to him????? Thor??????????? bruH???????????? buddy??????? pal???????? you really wanna go 1v1 the brother you very clearly underestimate and know nothing about????????????????? im loving the confidence, but, no.

Loki: “you literally can’t stop this from here.” Thor, immediately: “i’m going to hit it with the hammer and see if that works” and then it does in fact work later... technically speaking, even if it ends up causing chaos destruction and death and loki falling off the bifrost 😔😔😔 but Big Brain Thor is the Biggest Brained Thor!!! The plan worked!! in a messy-Thor-ish way, but it did!!!

“you can’t kill an entire race!!!!” Thor yells, teeth gritted, as he faces his brother, his coward pacifist brother, who has suddenly decided he wants to join the age-old family tradition of realm-destroying, when this is supposed to be Thor’s dream, Thor’s, not Loki’s. How dare he, Thor thinks to himself, fist clenched around Mjolnir in anger, the pain of the handle pressing against his palm perhaps the only thing preventing him from lashing out at this thought, that’s my planet of monsters to slay, he should go get his own! Loki hits Thor across the face with the back-end of his spear. “Now fight me,” Loki says, but Thor, well, Thor cannot fight, as he remains stunned that of all things Loki would dare steal his life’s ambition, and he is sent sprawling backwards across the observatory, slowly but surely sliding to a stop despite his catatonic, very symbolic silence.

the elegance, the poise, i see your time on earth has made you no less graceful, Thor. the simple magnitude of this sprawl. the spread of the arms. the turn of the feet. this is not a dude, this is a man.

sometimes your brother starts vehemently talking about he’s gonna kill the race of monsters and about how he’s only ever wanted to be your equal and about how he’s not your brother and never was and sometimes you just have to say “this is madness” instead of addressing the issues or asking for any of the deets 🔥 👊💯😩

Loki is whipping Thor’s butt. Both literally, and metaphorically, Loki is whooping Thor’s d*mb*ss. Earlier he knicked Thor’s face, now he’s just pushing Thor around, he uses the spear as a pole and later kicks Thor’s face by kicking vertically up, and Thor, bless him in all his blond golden muscled glory, doesn’t think anything is up with this, gosh he’s such an absolute utter idiot

sometimes your brother laughs way too much and also cries too much in a fight and there are also too many of him so you just need to blast lightning so you get a shot at all of them 😌😌😌 and then put your magical infinitely-heavy hammer on his chest 😌😌😌 but it’s okay because Thor left holes in Loki’s container 😌😌😌

now THIS is the meat to Thor’s funny bone, just the pure unadulterated humour that is Thor saying that there will never be a “wiser king” or a “better father” than Odin, it cracks me up every single time without fail, just the way he says it with a straight face and— what do you mean he wasn’t joking

look at Thor’s stupid smile as he asks Heimdall to spy on jane every single day while conveniently never asking after Loki ever. This is Thor’s face in mourning after he attended a feast after everyone was celebrating after Loki’s death. Look at his stupid smile. I love him your honour. He’s just,, he’s just so frickin stewpeed, just Thor being Thor, just the purest of d*mbest of *sses.

#listen #if people can interpret loki and the grandmaster as a thing when loki spends the entire time looking uncomfortable about every situation #then i can interpret thor as flirting with people when there are actual canon questions which get solved when other explanations dont work #so #dont mind me here #in conclusion: thor is a dum dum idiot and it's *chef's kiss*#thank you for coming to my ted talk #ThisPostIsLongerThanMyLifeSpan #TPILTMLS #Language!#language #im one of those people who comments on things through movies but you can't be mad because it's worth it and i've got points #obviously writing means i can get the full gist of the comments out without summarizing #but #like #my family is simply underappreciative and i'm a genius

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iluvthingsfree99 · 3 years

Text

bräñdÿ mēłvïłłē methods!!

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED FOR TEENS! i haven’t seen anyone do this yet so i wanted to share the methods that work for me @ basically any bräñdÿ store !! also i have done all of these with at least one or two of my lifter friends and it has worked so far (knock on wood).

let’s start off with the precautions to take beforehand:

i HIGHLY recommend having a friend when going into brandy. the stores that are not located on a street or something are generally much smaller (and more difficult to lift from), compared to those in a plaza or mall. the ones in the PLAZAS or MALLS are the best options to go to especially during the pandemic. what i personally like doing a day before lifting is googling the store that you’re going to visit on yelp or any other website that can show the store’s exterior and interior. i always do this to get a realistic idea of the store’s layout based on where the register is in the pictures. don’t forget to go on their website and scout some clothing you might like! though, there is no option to check what is inside the store and isnt, it’s good to have a general idea of what you want in terms of basics, outerwear, bottoms, etc etc.

me and my friends also usually wear very basic bräñdÿ girl clothing like mom jeans, a cropped long sleeve top, oversized sweater, and converse. since these bräñdÿ’s are located in wealthier areas, i try to look a bit more upperclass so they wouldn’t expect anything. we bring dark-colored tote bags (thank god for this trend) or one of us brings a kanken since mostly teenage girls are in/work there and we dont look suspicious. we also save large shopping bags from common clothing stores such as uniqlo, urban outfitters, zara, etc. and hold one bag each with a sweater or two inside (depending on the size) to make it appear as if we’ve bought a lot of clothing and that we have money to spend inside of the store (jokes on them, we never do AHAHAHA). kankens are very very useful since theyre small and no one really expects anyone to steal with it but trust me, it can hold A LOT.

next, what we’re usually all worried about - TAGS:

don’t worry about them in this store! there is NO security tags on any of the brandy melville clothing. (most likely because they are placed in more wealthier areas/malls) usually, they are just casually hung up by a wire wrapped in fabric or folded and placed on benches. i live in the US and i have never seen any kind of security tag ranging from the pencil kind to the more rounded ones.

now, who to watch out for:

CONFIDENCE IS KEY! don’t be nervous love! it’s usually a bunch of scrawny girls that work there anyways and from what i’ve seen, they do not have an LP and they very rarely have security guards. an LP is a higher up representative from the company that comes in to watch the tapes but they very rarely come by. the only thing to be aware of is the WORKERS. they are often dressed in regular plain clothing and blend in with other customers around you. when you walk in, it is only easy to distinguish the people working the register. i say to spend 5 minutes, browsing and picking up/putting back items to get a feel for the place and to see who are workers and who’s not. often, they go around to fix and fold varying items or they’re restocking different areas. customers and workers can be easily confused so i recommend staying on your toes and being self-aware. this is where a lookout is most useful and why i highly suggest bringing a friend just to keep an eye on anyone that may be passing by.

and for the BEST part - how to actually lift:

due to the size of the store, me and my friends have distinguished a language of common things to say in code. for instance, i might say, “can you reach that tank top for me?” which basically translates to: “i’m going to put this in my bag, keep a lookout.” we always, always, ALWAYS make sure to go into a blindspot because it is so hard to find the cameras unless they are placed directly on the wall (honestly, thank god for the pandemic because these masks are SUCH lifesavers since they cover your face). anyways, since the tops are flimsy it is *very easy to stuff it in your regular lifting bag. if it is your first time, i reccomend getting any and all tops. i usually just put some in my extra shopping bag quickly and pile up on them. i also carry my kanken with only one arm and leave the zipper a bit open for my friends to easily slip in anything they want inside. i am about 5′4 and both of my friends are 5′6 - 5′7 so usually one person stands in front of me and one is behind me so then the person in front can reach for anything i might like, take it off the hanger and pass it to my friend behind me to place in my bag. it can also work with two people where the person holding the kanken passes each top to their friend behind them. but for the 3 people, i hope this poorly drawn diagram explains it a bit better LMFAOOO

for sweaters, since they are thicker, i mostly use a large zara shopping bag and place it under an actual zara puffer i got previously (but honestly any sweater from any store would work as a cover for it too, i’m just a very paranoid person and scared they might check my bag LMAO). moving the clothes around would be loud but they always play music in the store and those working are always doing something else. last but not least, for pants, this is when i like to use my kanken since they are larger than both a sweater and a tank it’s riskier. i usually hold them up to my waist, see if they might fit, and then i pretend to set it down when really i’m folding it to make it smaller. after, it is folded or rolled up very tightly, my friend becomes a lookout and i open the zipper to my kanken “looking for my wallet” and then i just stuff it in really quickly. before exiting the store, make sure you have no sleeves stinking out of ANY of your bags because there is almost always someone waiting at the door counting those coming in and out because of covid. remember to act CASUAL! if you act nervous, it will most definitely show to the workers. me and my friends are usually in there for about 15 - 30 minutes which is kind of a long time so one of us actually buys something cheap and simple as an explanation while the others leave and wait somewhere else.

and i think that is it AHAHA. if you have any questions or if i missed anything, be sure to pm me, i am more than happy to help !! remember: act casual! dont conceal on camera / BLINDSPOTS ARE YOUR BESTFRIEND! trust your gut and dont get greedy with items! i know everything in there is cute but it’s always good to not overdo it for the sake of both yourself and your safety!

here’s something for all the new babylifters too:

the paranoia gets better over time! use all the information on liftblr at your disposal and learn from experience and new knowledge! remember that whatever corporation you are lifting from, it is from a company that rakes in millions upon millions of dollars exploiting workers for a shirt that only takes 6 cents to make but is being sold for $26. the toxic capitalist system is justification enough and i promise that the workers and the company itself are BARELY affected by lifting. taking $200 worth of clothes or even $16, it is merely pocket change to these corporations. so, always stay safe and good luck loves !!!

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ushiwakaout · 3 years

Text

Things I believe Matsukawa Issei and you’re kid would say if you lived together (From the moment you wake up to the moment you fall asleep)

i’m ONLY doing this because @sloppykyuu is just begging me to write about Issei 🙄 (and @kac-chowsballs requested it as well)

Merry christmas Pea! I’m Latina so i celebrate today (the 24th) 💚

established relationship || fem mommy reader || you and Matus have a kid together and you call him Bub/kiddo/bean their name is Sora (unisex name so u can decide if it’s a girl or boy)

“Hey bean, let’s go wake up your momma.” (7:00 am)

“No... mommy’s scary when she makes up.”

“I know bub, i wake up to her every morning, how do you think i feel?”

you: “I can hear you Issei!!!”

“He meant to say scary beautiful momma.”

you: “Don’t defend your dad bub.”

“Shut up and give me a kiss woman.”

“How’d you sleep? Good? Good.”

“Not feeling sore?”

“Ow, he’s not even listening, huh bean.”

“What?”

“See exactly my point.”

“I don’t work today, so how about we go out today and have some family time.”

*will tangle his fingers in your hair while you’re still in bed*

“Or do you wanna stay in bed and get a sitter~”

“Ow, dont hit me. I’m just making suggestions.”

“Hey, bean- why don’t you give daddy and mommy some alone time, yeah?”

*your kid whines a little because he low key was falling asleep on your chest*

you: “Come on kiddo, i’ll make you whatever you want for breakfast.” (7:30 am)

“anything?”

*Sora’s legit rushing out the door*

“Come here.”

*Isseis already dressed but you’re nude on the sheets, makes you sit on his lap anyways*

“You sure you don’t wanna get a sitter.”

*he’s holding your hips and he’s kissing you all over, he’s doing it in a sweet romantic manner*

“You can have a date night and everything.”

“You know bean doesn’t mind, he’s old enough to get that mommy and daddy need alone time.”

“Family time? You sure?”

*hes caressing the small of your back and just giving you the most softest smile.”

“Come on , get up and let’s make Sora some breakfast.” (8:00 am)

*he really do be handing you one of his old uniform shirt and a pair of his clean boxers, he knows they makes you feel comfy*

“Bean, hey- leave your mom alone while she’s cooking.”

“But i wanna watch.”

*big eye roll from Issei but he’s not surprised he’s fascinated with his mother because, like father like son*

“Need some help?”

“Are you sure?

“Fine... Give me a kiss.”

“Their not even watching...”

“You look sexy in my clothes, have I told you that?”

*smacks you’re ass before kissing your cheek and walking back to Sora*

“Done? Look good babe.”

“No,no,no put the dishes down.”

“You cook, I clean, remember?”

*you roll your eyes and set the plates down in the sink*

“Good girl. Go clean up with Sora while i do this.” (9:00 am)

*you and Sora are in the bath together missing around, making a mohawk with their hair and everything*

*Matsu is all finished up with the dishes when he’s leaning on the door frame and listening to the two of you giggle in the bath*

*god he’s so in love with you it’s so sweet*

“You guys finished yet?” (9:40 am)

you: “Take a picture pops, it’ll last longer.”

“Take a picture- yeah you know what maybe i will.”

*takes a few pictures, definitely takes some on you and crops out Sora*

“Come on bean, let’s give mommy some alone time.”

“Want me to dress them?”

“Oh come on, i don’t dress then up so bad.”

“Fine, fine- I’ll keep it simple.”

“Stay here bean, i’ll be right back. I’m gonna check up on mom, yeah?”

you: “Why are you back here Issei.”

“Mmm just wanted to see if my sweet girl needs some company.” (10:00 am)

*a very quiet quicky, will fuck you over the sink with his hand wrapped around your neck so your back is so close to his chest, makes you watch yourself drool over his cock*

“You don’t want Sora to know that her mommy is a slut for her daddy’s cock.”

*hes legit got such a foul mouth*

“MOMMY I NEED TO PEE!!!”

*Issei burst out laughing bc you’re mid orgasm*

“Mommy’s coming Sora...”

*you’re punching his thigh a couple a thighs because he’s being an asshole*

“hurry im gonna pee of the floor.”

“Bean, you’re not even dressed yet.”

*bean is really running naked into the bathroom*

“I wanted mommy to dress me.”

you: “see i told you, you suck at dressing them.”

“hey- i’m trying my best here.” (10:20 am)

you: “Bubs, you’re getting to old to carry.”

“No im not.”

“No he’s not.”

“Come here, mom’s too weak to carry you bean.”

“No she’s not.”

you: “Thanks bean but mommy is a little weak so i need Issei to carry you.”

“But i don’t want papa.”

“Ouch, that hurt.”

“Only if papa buys me some tokoyaki.”

“Deal, come here bug.”

*Sora is a crawler so he likes crawling up from your feet until you cary him and he’s don’t it to the point where he scratches*

*that’s why issei doesn’t let him climb in him anymore- he picks him up and throws him on his shoulders*

“Woah, i’m so tall! Look momma!”

“Hey, give me your hand.”

“Because i wanna hold it woman, now give it to me.”

“Do you wanna share tokoyaki? No, thought so.”

“Open up *issei 100% likes feeding you in public to embarass you* Good girl. Taste good?” (1:00 pm)

*you probably take Sora to a park because she’s very energetic and needs to let it out somewhere*

“They’re getting so big...”

“Let me put another baby in you, yeah?”

“Come on, you’d look so good all full and plum for me.”

“Stop blushing woman, you should know you’re sexy by now.”

*he knudges your hip while you hide your face into his back*

*he kisses your hair and then the tip of your nose*

*Sora is running towards their dad and shes pulling on his jeans*

“Is mommy crying or did you embarrass her again.”

“I embarrassed her again.”

*cue pouty Sora*

“Bad daddy, come on momma, let’s get you away from meanie.”

you: “yes please.” (2:00 pm)

*sora makes you push them of the swings*

*issei once again is taking pictures of you if his kid*

*sora ends up playing with dogs that are like twice her size and one of them topples over her and she’s flying to the grown*

you: “Sora! You alright baby?!”

“let’s do that again mommy!!!”

“Do that one more time and i think you’ll kill your mommy.”

*you go back with issei for a bit and someone starts a fight with Sora bc she took someone’s swing*

“MOMMY THEY STARTED IT!!!”

you: “I know sora, hold on a second.”

*you get in a small altercation with another mother and you snap at them, leaving them quiet as hell*

“That was really sexy.”

you: “She called bean mean things, you thought i was gonna sit there and just listen?”

“Mmm, feisty... That’s very sexy of you momma bear.”

you: “Issei i’m gonna punch you.”

“Understood princess.”

“You two hungry yet?” (4:00 pm)

“YES! More tokoyaki!!!”

you: “bean you’ve had enough tokoyaki.”

“There’s no such thing.”

you: “yes there is, and i’m in the mood for ramen.”

“Got it, ramen it is. Let’s do Sora.”

“but.... tokoyaki.”

“Bean, they 100% have tokoyaki.”

“YES!!!”

you: “Carefull bean the foods probably hot.” (5:30 pm)

*they proceed to throw a tokoyaki ball in their mouth and they immediately spit it out*

“HOT TOKOYAKI!! OUCH!”

“Bean, this is why you listen to mommy.”

“I’m sleepy!” (6:30 pm)

you: “you want me to pick you up?”

“please!”

you: “They out yet?” (7:00 pm)

“Out cold...”

“Hold on, don’t move... Let me take picture.”

“Look this way, good girl- now smile for me.”

*looking down at his phone a little to long while he’s admiring you with his kid*

“We made that.”

“God please let me put another baby in you.”

“Give me a kiss pretty girl.”

“I love you.” (8:30 pm)

“Want me to tuck them in?”

“Alrighty hand them over. You go get ready for bed.”

“They really are out cold.”

“Mmm you look so beautiful.”

“Give me a kiss.”

“I can’t say it enough but you- You are so damn fine.”

*he 100% is fucking you with purpose tonight. he’s such a good baby daddy and just fills you up to the brim with his cum while fucking your pretty pussy*

“Let me lay on your chest baby.”

*proceeds to kiss your chest*

“I love you so much sweet girl.”

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khaleesiofalicante · 2 years

Note

レクシーは東京に行きたいと言っていたので、これでいいと思いました。こんにちは！もう一度ここで私はこの人々の半分のために同性愛者です

So, I tried the tea yesterday and I still had a weird dream but it wasn’t bad so THANK YOU!! OH and also I'm like Alec bc when I cant fix something I start fixing little things to cope, so I had like 20 open tabs with different fics that I wanted to read but I couldn’t and I just read most of them through this day to clear that up and there was one of yours!! I think it was called "Last on the list" Bro, that shit hurted and I fucking loved it so much💙💙💙 I will stop there bc if I continue I will rant about all the things I LOVED about it <3333 Anyway, LETS GO!!!

I also want dreamless sleep please!!! I love that shit too!! (but good for her!!)

I love the words you are using for each one <3

OMG its their birthday??? And 17 yo??? I lost her age at 15 wtf??

“Nope. Rapunzel is currently on Sleeping Beauty mode.” Ok, that was a good pun tho...

Gabriel is jsbdkdkdk🥺

Fuck Michael!!! LOVE SELENA!!! YESSS

The amount of joy I get from them calling her Sirenita.... 💙 AND RUE?!! 💙💙

Bro you haven't talked to Liv??? Get your gay together and talk to her!! (this from a girl that just 2 nights ago realized my best friend liked me back but we were both idiots smh. Dont follow my stepts dude..)

Its amazing that she is controlling her powers and using them to help people as she loves💙

Oh god Lexi and Max are masters at blackmail😂

YES THEY HAVE THEIR BASKETBALL EQUIPMENT!

Jace is so🥺🥺 makes me so emo seeing him be a father💙💙 AND THE PRESENT OMG I LOVE

So, how do I tell you this...?

Now, thats betrayal.... Also him calling Simon a rat jsjhsydkjs I cant with those two

David understands😌

Mavid's picture tho🥺🥺

ROSEWOOD MOVE TOGETHER?? YESSS❤️

Wait, how long has this been since last chapter?

Lovehollow are just big softies💙💙

Gabriel and Selena live in my heart and head 24/7 free rent <3

God, TALK. TO. HER

✨Parabatia✨

They are literally the cutest parabatias💙THEY ARE MY RELIGION

HOLY FUCK SHE MADE A SWORD FOR HER!! WTF WHY IS SHE SO GORGEOUS???🥺🥺

"Be Gay. Do Crime." Bro, bro thats the sweetest thing like ever!!! THEY ARE THE SWEETEST!!

David and Jace being protective fam!!

Ok, but David must look so good tho...

Honestly cant blame Max😂😂 he is a lil horny shit I love sjsjjsksns

"Selena was always happy for other people. Now she was happy for herself." YES SHE IS SO HAPPY AND SHE DESERVES THAT💙💙

Yes she has, Jace, she had a sword😌

Istg this girls better talk to each other or so help me god...

Ok, but I just realized Selena is wearing a crop top!! AND STRIPED JEANS!! She is getting better and happier each day I'm kdjsisjsis <33

David touching Izzy's belly is literally so soft and wholesome I'm about to cry 😭

Firecrackers with the colors of the pride flag... Can the stop being perfect??? Honestly they settle really high hopes for friendship its not fair!!

Malec being malec >>>>>

Yes Brother Enoch is here yall!!!

"Sit here and brood with me.”😂😂

He has no time for bullshit. He has enough Herondale practice

I didn't see that coming!!! Liv was the one who asked for the potion 🥺 AND SHE STILL GOES HOLY FUCK!!

"Alexandra. Do not make me push you off the rooftop." Please do it bro!! I love her but she need it dbjslsnd

HE IS THE REAL MVP

I can't believe he is giving Lexi dating advice 😂 he is so done with Jem and Herondales pining and I say GO OFF

If I do it, will you promise to leave me alone? “We both know that’s not going to happen, bro.” (Come on, you love Lexi and you know it!!)

HE HIGH-FIVE HER OMG YESS

I love all their pijamas!!! I barely have and old one of a salior :(

Achilles knows the real tea kdbsksnsn

You like each other!! Just kiss already!! (although I also love their awkwardness <3)

"This fake thing we did?” Lexi asked. “It was the realest shit I’ve done.” (I'm-🥺🥺🥺🥺)

“Then let me wake you up.” HOLY FUCK YESS FINALLY OH GOD I'M SO HAPPY FOR THEM AND I'M CELEBRATING AND JDBDKSKKSM. ALSO "The kiss was very good and very gay. The end." FUCKING MOOD

“You’ve always been my angel. Olivia. You are the only angel I care about.” I just cant with this scene. My heronstairs feelings came true and they are a power couple and I'm so gay for them

Honey... Stop talking😂😂

*sigh* girls, right?

“No,” Lexi said and pulled back. “I booked a date with you for the rest of my life.” (You cant just say romantic shit like that and expect me to be ok!!! But yess bloody Herondales!!!💙💙)

"And Lexi, for once, fell with a smile." I'm not ok and I'm perfect at the same time jdjdksns

Air is no important when you are gay and there are two girls with swords kissing each other

😂Yeah, she is bad at snicking out

Clary, it wasn’t your fault!!! 🥺🥺

She can keep some parts for helself hell yeah!!

CLARY IS SOO WISE AND HER ADVICE SO GOOD I'M AMAZED BY HER (and honeslty saving some to rember later bc everything she said was on point and I sometimes forget it)

Loyalty before all lmao😂😌

"Sometimes it doesn’t, baby,” her mother said gently. “But you get better at carrying it, okay?” 💞💞

Pressure? Ok, I aprove and love it💙💙Yeah, they can also pass good pressure!! SOMETHING THEY CAN FIGHT WITH HOLY-

WOW. Her. Just wow. She is such an amazing character.. Strong and funny and kind and everything else (still so gay for her)

バイバイ！！また近いうちにお会いしましょう！今週のご多幸をお祈り申し上げます。

Hello baby 💙

oh noooo you read that fic idk why I even wrote that lmao skdfnksf it was just pain lol. Glad you survived.

Also, you said it's a tough week. How are you keeping up? I'm glad the sleep is a little better!!!!

And god I love your reactions.

As always, I sneak in random things that make me uwu and you someone always manage to spot them.

HOW?

This is the face David had every time he felt Abigail kick in Izzy's stomach:

#i literally saw him going KSABHDKASDJKA every damn time #lbaf

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christaline · 3 years

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Hi hi I saw you have a crochet tag and was wondering if you crochet??? I followed you originally for gizz stuff but oh my gosh I've been looking for more people who crochet!! If you do crochet you can tell me all about your projects, I enjoy hearing about them and it gives me ideas!!

Hell yeah i crochet it’s one of my Special Interests. I like making skirts. I’m working on like 2 and a half of them. The first one I’m using this nice color changing yarn but i dont have a pic of it cuz I barely have started bc i am focusing on my other skirt.

Completely forgot what this kind if crochet is called lol. Buuuut it’s like a little graph and you have to like...fill in boxes to make a picture. Imagine a graphgan but with one color lol. I mean i could do more than one color and i very might do that later!!! But! Not today!

Here’s the graph i am using. I like printing patterns out. At some point I’ll put them all in a book lol. Each box is made of a ch3 and filled boxes are 1dc at the start, 2 to fill it. So 3dc plus like...1 that starts the next box. That confused me for a while lol. But it’s extremely easy. You could do ch4 with boxes of 3dc and it would be wider. But I always do it this way. The pattern has a part for making it a dress but i am not going to follow it. I plan on making a crop top with this to match. As you can see, it’s not an even increase so it’s gonna be kinda...flat ish? I usually do really flowy so eh. I am using:

1.60mm hook that i keep using. I actually only use the bigger hooks (I consider anything above 3mm big) when i make like shawls and hats and sweaters. I prefer small hooks with mercerized cotton or lace weight yarn, anything above weight 2 yarn is...annoying!!

I also made this one but i have no idea what to do with it? I messed up and uh. It’s fucking huge? It was my first time using a pattern i wrote myself and the increases are SO off that crocheting around once takes 4hrs lol. It’s got so many ruffles and only goes down to my just above my knees! I don’t like i am gonna finish it💀. How i got this pattern is a LONG story but if you know any of Mary Croché’s work on instagram I literally just stared at her stuff and copied that i just did NOT count her increases lol. Now that she has her charts for sale I’m probably gonna buy one and try again tho!!!

The other stuff i made i dont have pics of but I’ve made a few shirts and sweaters, a shit ton of winter shawls and hats (i make a beanie almost every year bc i loose them💀). I only make scarves for others. I hate making scarves! And i made my boyfriend a rug but he doesn’t use it much😑

(Yeah i fucked up the rug but...it works!)

THANK YOU FOR ASKING!!!! You can talk to me abt crochet any time i will never Shut Up about it lol. Tell me about your stuff!!! Show me pics! I want to do a detailed graphgan at some point in my life!

Bonus bonus! The first time i tried to make this red skirt when i was like...idk maybe 19? Possibly 20? I didn’t know it was meant to be down in the round and I attempted to attach them separately. Oh what a silly thing to do lol.

#crochet tag #also: i dont believe in blocking #i refuse #especially for clothes

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aangarchy · 3 years

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people on this site are constantly complaing about how characters always look too pretty, showing too much skin or having technicolor eyes or whatever, and you get these characters that actually like real women and not supermodels and the fandoms like, this is bad actually? i think you guys dont even know what you want honestly. also the original winx cartoon already lightskinned the few brown girls they had lol.

Really?

[ID: a picture of the original winx club cartoon. There’s six girls, all of them are wearing their fairy transformation outfits. On the top left we have Aisha/Layla. She’s standing with her arms crossed and a smile on her face. Her eyes are brown, her skin is dark, and her hair is auburny brown and curly. On her right we have Tecna, who’s body is facing the viewer, one hand placed on her hip, and her face is angled to the right, showing her face in profile. She has light skin, hot pink short hair, and has green eyes. Next to her we have Bloom. She’s doing the typical magical girl pose, with one leg in the air and her hands extended. She has blue eyes, wavy ginger hair, and light skin. Then we have Flora. Her legs are posed in X position (knees facing inward) with her arms to her side. Her skin is dark, but lighter than Aisha’s, and she has light brown hair with blonde e-girl bangs, and has green eyes. Below Aisha we have Musa, who’s sitting with her back to the viewer, looking at us over her shoulder. She has light skin, her eyes are smaller than any of the other girls and are very dark, you can barely see her pupils. She has jetblack hair styled in two high pigtails. She’s also wearing headphones. Stella is next to Musa, facing the viewer. She’s sitting, supporting herself with her arms. She has a slightly tanned light skin, amber colored eyes, and blonde hair styled in low and long pigtails. She’s also wearing a blue diadem. End ID]

Your first point, on how they look too pretty: it’s... a cartoon... aimed at little girls... idk about you but when I was a little girl I didn’t like to watch “ugly” looking cartoons. Even the villains and teachers in this cartoon were pretty. Even the old headmistress of alfea was pretty, she didn’t have a single wrinkle. Another reason for them being “too pretty” is because their designs were based off of real celebs who were popular at the time or are still popular. Flora is designed after Jennifer Lopez, Tecna after Pink, Musa after Lucy Lui etc. Are their bodies unrealistically thin? Yes, they very much are, and they’re not diverse at all. That’s the one issue I had with the original cartoon.

Then you say they show too much skin: uhh, I don’t know if you’re aware but this show was made in the early 2000’s, aka the era of crop tops, low rise jeans, booty shorts, short skirts, etc. Celebs wore this stuff on red carpets. These are supposed to be fashion foreward 16yr old girls. You’re not gonna tell me you’ve never seen a 16yr old in a crop top are you? Also, let women wear what they want? They don’t exist for you to gawk at them like they’re a walking exhibition? Why are you sexualising 16yr olds?

There’s only 6 main characters and three of them are woc. Aisha is black, Flora is brown and latina, Musa is east asian. Their character design shows this very clearly, with Musa’s eyes being small and dark and her hair also being dark, Aisha’s skin being dark and her lips fuller than the others, and her hair being curly. Flora’s skin is also darker, albeit not darker than Aisha’s. Her latina coding came from episodes where her parents and culture was featured. Flora is the only character of color with light hair and light eyes. Musa is the only character of color with very light skin, but that’s not unrealistic.

Netflix on the other hand, completely erased Tecna, who had short hair and who’s interests were very tech related. They whitewashed both Musa and Flora and renamed Flora Terra. The only diversity left is Aisha, who thank fuck is still a black girl, and then Terra, who’s a plus size girl. I’ve said this before, I love plus size representation since I’m considered plus size, but NEVER at the expense of brown women.

Idk if you’ve noticed but I NEVER spoke on these actresses’s looks, I never once called them ugly, it’s literally NOT the reason I’m upset at this live action. I’m upset bc Netflix whitewashed two out of three woc, erased the one character with interests that are considered “masculine” (by society), and decided to dress these girls the way I dressed when I was 12. I’m not upset with the actresses at all, I’m upset with netflix, the show’s writers, the casting director and the costume designer.

The way you just spoke to me clearly shows you didn’t even READ my post complaining about this show. You’re clearly just trying to find away to DEFEND netflix’s erasure and it’s ugly.

#ask dori #anon #anonymous #fate the winx saga #winx club

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thirsthourdemon · 4 years

Text

Headcanon on their online platforms but mainly on Twitch, onlyfans stuff, patreon, tumblr

Includes: Demon bros + undateablesss

Genre: Crack, Fluff and slight smut

Warnings: NSFW mentions

||Lucifer

-He didn’t have a big online presence because he was active, no no

-He had an online presence cause everyone always sees him on Diavolo s pictures and such so for a time they shared an audience

-One time Diavolo and Barbatos were doing a thing where they read a book aloud for some sort of game

-Diavolo kind of recorded that for a little bit

-ASMR I TELL YOU

-People liked it so much they suggested for “the one with the deep cold voice”, luci, to do asmr on youtube or something

-He doesn’t know what an Onlyfans is however he does have a patreon.

-Diavolo was interested in the idea and discussed it with him

-HE BLEW UP CAUSE EVERYONE WAS FREAKING OUT OVER HOW AMAZING HIS VOICE WAS OF COURSE! 😡

-His fandom consists of either people who are interested in what he reads or...Horny people who get off at how proper and low his voice is

-His profile picture is a picture of him with his head cropped out where he’s fixing his gloves

-Luci isnt like super famous but he has a loyal fanbase that appreciates him a lot also lots of simps with daddy issues

-He was confused as to why someone would ask him to be their father

-He gets the daddy kink but why???

-Last post: A picture MC took where he’s holding a whip cause mammon fucked something up 🙂

||Mammon

-Bold of us to assume he didn’t already have one

-You already know why he’s on here.

-He has random content but he mainly got his audience since he kind of tried modeling thing for a while. It was for a big brand on their new jock type jackets

-Mammon really wanted cash at that time and he got the thing over and done with making him a couple more grims richer

-The photographers told him they could transfer the pictures though! So he just saved his pictures because “Who wouldn’t want a picture of THE mammon?”

-That gave him the idea

-His audience? Whoreknee

-They even accept the fact that his captions for some pictures are “You should be honored you get pictures of me”

-He posts that with a blushing face half of the time HAHAHAHA

-Levi found it and just laughed at the pictures

-Surprisingly enough the pictures were actually well taken because MC was forced into em

-His most popular picture was the one with him was actually a picture that the brothers took of him tucking in what appeared to be goldie on a seperate MINI BED WITH A SMALL TOY LAMP BESIDE IT

-He did a QnA for his followers to celebrate on his instagram

-PFFTT He got so many questions about Goldie

-Was dubbed “Goldie’s Daddy” after that

-Last post: A picture of him wearing the new Luxury brand jacket he got and his keys in front of his car with the caption “Daddy’s going for a ride”

||Leviathan

-I’ve always head canon that Levi knows how to draw digital emotes. Like he just picked it up cause he wanted to make fanart of him in henry together 😔

-Also has a red bubble or an etsy where he sells some prints and stickers of fanart 👀

-He went on twitch since there were so many TSL streamers there who just played games while they discussed theories as well

-Levi is an emote artist and while he draws he sometimes just discusses the theories with his fellow Yucky Otakus

-He’s the type to really interact with everyone even though he barely does that in real life

-Sometimes though when he gets packages that fans sent or ones that he ordered he’d stream unboxing them.

-He hates showing his face? Oh dont worry He’s wearing a facemask and all that

-His fandom is genuinely into him. Like they actually like him as a person but kinda once got into a scandal on gatekeeping

-He took a break for a bit but he kind of said sorry and everyone just forgave him because he isn’t really the type to do drama and it was just that one instance-

-Overall loved by the community due to how chill he is and how invested he is on fan theories

-He has a twitter btw and lemme tell you it’s just threads and threads of discussions

-Whenever he does stream unboxing videos though and he shows his shelves everyone freaks out how he has EVERY FUCKING VOLUME OF EVERY ANIME AND GAME

-People sometimes ask him personal questions and he tries his best to try to answer them but he shows a face where he looks uncomfy

-Everyone just bullies anyone who makes him uncomfy giving his fanbase a very protective reputation

-Last post: “Unboxing fanmail L8er @ 10pm LOL CYA GUYS XD”

||Satan

-He has a tumblr. You cant tell me he doesn’t have one.

-He had tumblr like back in the old day though like when porn was still available here.

-Get this...He’s known all through out the academia blogs. He INVENTED Academia

-Satan has 1 blog and that’s it. It’s his main blog and he just posts pictures of the book cover and does essays, reviews or sometimes he writes the ending he wanted to happen.

-Dont get me wrong he has a patreon but only because people loved getting more exclusive takes of stuff like his book notes on certain pages or sometimes his notes and thoughts on Artistic Erotica

-Probably has a Ko-Fi because he though he needed it after most of the blogs he followed had it

-He thinks it should be “Table of Content” and not “Masterlist” so he uses just that

-Profile picture is him wearing his signature washed out green grandma sweater while he has a book in hand and a cup of earl grey on his table

-People go to him falling in love with his aesthetic and Book reviews but they stay in love with him because he is big on one on one discussions actually

-He goes for one on one voice calls where he just...He talks to you about any book of your choosing

-Fans send him tea but he knows better than to eat something a stranger gives so he makes beel take a taste first sometimes but ultimately scolds the boy when he takes too much

-He wasn’t supposed to have merch but everyone liked the idea of small packages (More like letters) that really do look old and vintage

-He usually only give those to the people who pay for the top tier stuff

-It usually contains 1 type of tea, a letter he wrote for them himself and a bookmark with his name stamped on it

-He got the stamp custom made ❤️

-Last post: (Insert 5k word essay)

This is what I thought of Edgar Allan Poe’s “A cask of Amatillado”

Playlist: (Insert soft classic Music playlist on Spotify)

Tea: Black Currant

||Asmodeus

-ONLY FANS THROUGH AND THROUGH

-Is a brand influencer as well

-The brand ambassador of this pretty well known semi-luxury skin care brand

-His devilgram? Perfectly made by his PR team which is just him and solomon

-Before I move onto the NSFW stuff I want to emphasize how Beautiful his instagram is and his aesthetic

-His aesthetic is romantic/sexual tension/Unparalleled beauty

-Also a make up brand influencer and has his own make up line

-something along the lines of “The Devil’s box of charms 🖤”

-The type to DG live whenever he’s just showing off the make up look he did or the outfit he got

-The house of lamentation may have PR packages stacking up due to how most of them have an online influence but out of 10 boxes 7 of them would be for Asmo

-OKAY NOW ONTO NSFW STUFF

-Lemme tell you this...He has a specific drawer and space in his closet just for the sexy outfits he has.

-The demon’s onlyfans has pictures of him just teasing his audience where he’s wearing a black skintight get up and his bulge is showing

-Nudes are for mid and top tiers

-His fandom loves seeing in stocking and chokers

-“The choker is from etsy and here’s the link to their shop~”

-He doesnt completely show his body but...Him in suggestive clothing gets everyone pre cumming

-His fandom is just filled with simps 😔

-He loves them and blows a kiss towards the camera everytime he ends a live

-Probably has had a scandal or 4

-Posted an Ahegao once and everyone lost it

-Has been the face for Ahegaos ever since

-Belle delphine who?

-Definitely tik tok famous too 😎

-Has memorized all of Doja Cat’s songs

-Last post: “Hope you guys are ready for tonight’s session~ 😈” With a picture of him in an Fuchsia and black themed lingerie set. A collar with a bell on it.

-Bonus: One time Solomon summoned him while he was taking pictures and he was still in his lingerie set. 😛

||Beelzebub

-Was originally inspired by Mukbangs Channels so he did them on youtube too

-You get his Mukbangs on your recommended, You subscribe because of his cute and funny reactions whenever someone in the backgrounds is astounded to how much he’s eating

-Everyone knew beel as a cute guy who just does Mukbangs and loves to eat

-He once did a fridge raid and ended up eating everything in the fridge

-That was THE MOST CHAOTIC VIDEO on his channel cause you can just see luci and MC trying to make him stop

-He eventually got a patreon because mammon told him people will give him more money for food like that and to be honest he made a patreon but mammon takes care of it from time to time

-Oh you knew him as this sweet beautiful boy who just likes eating? hERe HavE sOmE WorKOUt pICs

-His body got everyone thirsty or may I say Starving

-S I M P S everywhere

-His patreon content is just him making small videos eating or pictures of him being all sweaty from the gym 😛💦

-“DADDY BWDONMXMSKC PLEASE FEED US”

-“Eh? You should feed me instead” *opens his mouth*

-Fans send him lots of boxes of weird food to see his reaction sometimes

-Did the fire noodle challenge a bit late but everyone is surprised to how he isn’t giving the reaction like they expected him

-Spice tolerance? Unmatched

-His fandom is either “UwU Beel please eat try this!” Or “Daddy Please FEED US WITH YOUR DELICIOUS THIGHS! 😩🥵💦💦💦”

-He does the service where he sends you his body building pictures except he isn’t sending them, Mammon is.

-Manager Mammon 😎 Gets a half of the profit

-Can I just...BeelProbablyHasnevergottenintoanyscandalbuthasalotofhaterssayingthefansonlylikehimforhishandsomefaceandgreatbodyandnicevoicebutlikewhatiswrongwithlikinghimbecauseofthosethings?Itisntbadtolikethatstuffatall

-Last post: “🍙 Thank you to @(Your Username) for the Onigiri! I finished the whole batch! Please send more food”

||Belphegor

-Sleep Guru

-Im sorry but I cant see him having any other social media aside from tumblr, twitter and Devilgram

-Belphie barely checks his phone but he has tumblr because apparently there’s a thing called the SandMan’s Box Community

-It’s like LootCrate, a subscription service that gives you stuff like Comfy Pillow sheets and tea for better sleeping

-This even gives you something like sleeping masks or ear muffs.

-The community is well...nocturnal

-His ask box is always full of his 100+ mutuals who just discuss stuff with him

-Whenever he actually does try to type online he makes articles about the best sleep positions or stuff like that

-His fandom is just loving mutuals who sleep and take care of each other

-They have a discord server where it just plays soft music to help everyone sleep

-Last post: “Humans aren’t so bad when they’re asleep”

||Luke and Simeon

-He has a big following on twitch where he just bakes sweets in his cute little hat and-

-Clearly you can tell I follow him on twitch

-The type of twitch streamer that no one hates on because why would you? He is literally just baking and cute comments

-Sometimes he streams with Simeon and everyone loves both of them

-When people give money they dont give “money” no no...they call donating headpats

-Luke is just so adorable that everyone just...

-“Angel Lulu’s Protection Squad⭐️”

-He got famous when he...He doesnt want to call it a collab but He made a lot of sweets and gave them to beel so everyone freaked out and thought

-THE SWEET BOY THAT EATS A LOT AND THE ANGELIC CHILD THAT MAKES SWEETS A LOT ARE FRIENDS?!

-He is now pissed that everyone thinks they’re friends 😠

-Basically his fans started making dishes and candy inspired by him

-Sometimes they send it in and Simeon has to confiscate some because

-“Im sorry, guys. You are all really sweet and I know that you mean well but Luke isn’t allowed much sweets yet”

-No one ever EVER lewds luke

-Fortunately Luke’s fandom has the least amount of pedophiles because everyone drives them away the moment they try something

-Whenever luke does fan mail/unboxing videos people just adore how Simeon places a glass of water at the table below the camera and the scissors or cutter he uses is child proof

-Even though Luke is the main person on his account everyone also notices Simeon.

-How couldn’t they? He looked like he wanted to make everyone in the audience live a better life

-Add that with luke’s wholesome baking and BOOM! You are now ready for a better life🌟

-Last post: It’s a picture of Luke shyly showing of his new batch of sun and moon shaped sugar cookies. “Sun and Moon. Tune in later at 3 pm to see how we made these!”

||Solomon

-He barely posts but he helps asmodeus with his stuff

-Too busy with anything else but helps out when things get interesting

-Proposes Ideas for Asmo sometimes when the demon doesn’t know what to wear for a live or a story

-Laughs at Asmo sometimes when he gets into scandals and drama

-Happy cameraman ❤️

-People follow him because 1.) He’s hot 2.) The fans ship him with Asmodeus

-Last Post: “When will you learn 🙂”

||Diavolo

-He is a vlogger~ Not a very active vlogger but a vlogger nonetheless

-He films anything he can but he’s more known on tik tok and devilgram rather than twitch or youtube

-People have been thirsting for him ever since and no one can convince me that they dont just shamelessly call him daddy whenever he goes on live

-Barbatos makes sure however that whenever it isnt appropriate anymore that he would tell diavolo to turn the camera off

-Wranggled Luci into his mess and now everyone knows the face of that one dude who just reads documents

-Everyone lowkey ships them

-Diavolo is the type to take a picture of a big meeting or a retreat out of instinct to just document his life

-He actually didnt know about vloggers before but he just liked the thought of documenting it

-Everyone picks up “Master” vibes as they say from him hehehe

-He doesnt have an Onlyfans or patreon 😔😔😔

-I honestly would have subscribed to his services

-Last post: “Barbatos made a delicious meal for us at the retreat today” Along with a picture of the Beautiful Demon Delicacy Spread in the table.

Taglist: No one yet (Please be part of the taglist for more content like this ☹️ It’s getting really discouraging)

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what-kinda-fuckery · 4 years

Text

Hey so, I was one of the star struck falsettos stans that spent the forty dollars for the webinar, and I took notes (like a weirdo). So I decided I would share my funny moments and updates from the cast here!

- Host: Everyone should be keeping their audio off.

Christian: Oh alright!

Host: nO Christian not you

- Christians in Manhattan and his hair is back and he’s wearing a Superman t-shirt.

- Brandon is with his parents in NJ

- Stephanie and Brandon still love each other

- Brandon: Meat should be cooked just right

- Betsy: Stephanie are you in maple wood?

Stephanie: Well thank you for telling everyone where I am (she’s in NJ)

- Stephanie: Are you fucking kidding meee!!!

- Tracie is in LA, she looks like she’s in Costa Rica and I love her dog.

- Anthony’s VOICE IS LOW EVERYONES FREAKING OUT

they’re all talking about Anthony’s clear skin

- Andy Randy is in LA with a fresh haircut his boyfriend did it and he’s watching too much TV

Andrew: I’m watching this is America

Stephanie: SO GOOD

Andrew: SO GOOD

- Everyone’s having hard days

- Christian is acting out tracies dog’s pathetic bark and everyone’s like WHAT are you doing bc it looks like he’s about to throw up

- BETSY IS A WEEK AWAY FROM HAVINGA WHOLE CHILD

Betsy: What else do you do during a pandemic? Have a baby!

Andrew: Can I toss out another baby name? Celery.

Literally everyone: Goodnight Andrew goodbye!

- Christian is living with a girl (?) and playing board games instead of watching television

HE COOKS NOW EVERYONES PROUD OF HIM

Christian: yesterday I made pork filet en croute

Stephanie: I MADE PORK WITH SAGE AND APPLES ON WEDNESDAY

Stephanie: In mean girls they wear pink on wednesdays. In falsettos they make pork.

- I can’t get over Anthony’s voice

Again everyone returning to his literally perfect skin

- Stephanie: When watching four jews in a room in the beginning who’s in China?? I know the answer I just want to hear someone say it.

Andrew, with a thick accent: It was Bryna, in China, with a torn miniscus

- Christian: Did anything interesting make it on to the telecast between me and you? Andrew? Actually I dont remember I need to do my research.

Andrew: There’s been some strange comments about Christian and I- (AT THIS POINT IM WHEEZING)

HE MENTIONED THE TONY BONY

HE SAID IT WASNT A THING

HE DIDNT HAVE ONE

Andrew: No that’s not a thing that happened

Brandon: Andrew i want you to know that it’s okay if it was. It’s a safe space just the seven of us. (Lol)

- Bill Finn would take two steps into the room: “WROONG”

Stephanie: he wanted me to sing the end of I’m breaking down up the octave and I said #notmytrina

Brandon: #NOTMYTRINA

- Tracie what did you do during act 1

Tracie: Betsy and I sat in that dressing room for like an hour and a half

Andrew: You SANG the WHOLE SHOW TRACIE

- Betsy watched parts of the first act to feel like she was there

- Betsy sprained both her ankles at one point during the run and was a trooper anyways

Brandon reenacting Betsy limping during look look look look

Everyone dies laughing

Christians LAUGH makes me SO HAPPY

- Betsys screen is frozen like this: 🤨

Andrew: What if she went into labor??? (This is a common thread throughout the zoom)

- Anthony: I’m getting a lot of glitching so Stephanie is just like “HUH UH UH UH”

- Betsy comes back and everyone is like

YOU GUYS ITS COMING!!!

- They bought Andrew an ice cream for his birthday from the vending machine at rehearsal

- Andrew: The Hawaii crop top

Betsy: I would give anything to have that

- Tracie: it was very hard. Very precise bringing the blocks together

Brandon: Trying to be like oh my god we’re going to a funeral

Andrew: MY DEATH IT WAS MY DEATH

- fan question: What did the blocks weigh?

Stephanie: They were like thick yoga blocks. Not heavy but awkward shaped

Andrew: Significantly heavier when Anthony sat on them

Anthony: I just realized how much I got thrown around

Stephanie: Anthony were you proud of yourself? #proudofyou

Anthony: The one moment I was cringing was father and son

Christian: HERE WE GO *SLAPS TABLE*

Betsy: Anthony’s like BLAH BLAH BLAH blah my line BLAH BLAH BLAH my line BLAH BLAH

Christian: I LEAVE THE PAUSE IF YOU CANT GET IN THATS ON YOU

Anthony: I was blinking in that number like constantly

Christian: THE WHOLE THING LIKE A SALAMANDER

Oh Anthony.

- Andrew: I HAVE A STORY ABOUT CHRISTIAN BORLE. Tech for what more can i say. He was laying on me. We were shirtless in underpants under the blankets.

Christian: SLOWER

Andrew: he leaned over; He sniffed his armpit and said “I hope you like France”

EVERYONE DIES LAUGHING INCLUDING ME

Christian: i haven’t worn deodorant in 10 years true story

- Christian: i seem to remember holding our pillows and blankets pretending like we were partying on fyre island and Andrew said:

Andrew: WHATS YOUR NAME???

Christian: No no it was something like:

WHAT HOUSE ARE YOU STAYING IN??

Andrew: WHAT HOUSE ARE YOU STAYING IN???

Betsy: James lupine I feel like we’re ruining this show

- Andrew: The shenanigans were real but so was the sadness

Stephanie: We’re real and we’re funny what you gonna do

- Andrew talking about how hard the show was to do: Finding some liberty, It’s a hard world to live in all the time. It was a hard time especially for Christian. I would sometimes go home and cry for no reason

Brandon: Building up emotion with nowhere to put it

Betsy: then Lesbians come in and provide all the levity

Stephanie: Although Dr. Charlotte brings in horrible news

Tracie: Everything’s beautiful at what more can i say and I’m like not so fast

- Tracie always had a funny thing to say

- Who broke character the most on stage?

Anthony Stephanie and Christian

Anthony: it was when I said “I don’t want a bar mitzvah” and I spit in your face a lot and you went like *puts arms up* and someone at stage door was like very condescending like it’s not professional

Christian: Oh my bad we’re people sorry

- Stephanie wrote a line in the show “YOU HAVE PAINTINGS OF DICKS”

- James wanted her to cut off her finger during I’m breaking down

And turn around with a bandaged bloody finger

- Betsy’s nose bleeding during something bad is happening

And Tracie was like something BAD IS HAPPENING

Tracie: Christians throwing up right now

Betsy: Bloody Kleenex up the nose THE SHOW MUST GO ON

- Fan question: Stephanie how do you belt with a banana in your mouth

Christian: Practice practice practice

Stephanie: just shove it in your cheek. But Really that wasn’t supposed to happen

Anthony’s nickname in the rehearsal room was little bananas because he had to gather up all the pieces of stuff after Stephanie shoved the table over with her rear. Sometimes he didn’t have enough time to put it somewhere so he would just put the pieces of banana in his mouth and that’s where it came from

That’s why

- Andrew: Stephanie your glasses are very chic

Stephanie: Oh my gosh thank you *shocked*

- Betsy: Bill was like I’d rather DIE than change lyrics for the pbs special

FLaT aS a LaKe

- Cue everyone accidentally talking over each other and saying what at each other for 30 seconds

Christian: what? what? what?

Who is it?

What’s going on?

- If you could play anyone else in the show who would it be

Anthony said Mendel

Tracie said Mendel

Brandon said Trina

Andrew said marvin

Betsy said whizzer

Stephanie said Mendel

And I honestly couldn’t hear if Christian said anything whoops

- Brandon: If someone could at some point explain to me the Mendel eats dirt meme? People have been Asking me if Mendel eats dirt? I don’t think it’s about Trina Trina is not the dirt. I was overwhelmed. Can someone in the Q&A explain this? *A few seconds later* oh It was from a meme generator?

Christian: Greaat.

Brandon: It’s a fan fiction about Mendel eating dirt and getting aroused by it

Everyone: WHAT

- They still get fan art

Someone recreated the whole soundtrack 8bit and also with KAZOOS

- Brandon: CONGRATS CHRISTIAN ON LULOS WIN FOR LITTLE SHOP. If you haven’t seen Christian in little shop it’s revelatory I’m not just blowing smoke up your ass I have not laughed that hard in a while at the theatre

- Christian talking about little shop

Christian has a 12 inch Batman toy in his dressing room and he misses it

- Ticket prices were getting out of control before corona everyones hoping this will make a difference

Brandon and everyone think it should get more accessible

- Brandon: Hear hear I need a refill

- Stephanie: Your hair looks incredible Brandon (it did)

Christian: She’s been waiting to talk about it for 53 minutes

- Andrew: Well Betsy what I’m wondering is have you crowned yet??

Proceed everyone dying

Brandon, taking a picture of the screen: This moment will go down in history as When Betsy was asked if she was crowning

- Everyone mimicking zoom freezing by starting a sentence and freezing halfway through

- Christian: What new Steven sondheim musical are you excited about Anthony *devilish grin*

Anthony having no idea what Christian is talking about

Christian: Come on Anthony you know the answer. Ugh. The minds of the young. You’re smoking pot now aren’t you??

Christian: We have a lot of fun

- Andrew: I’m trying to get people to pay attention to me

- Christians pretending to be frozen

Cue a lot of yelling: Stephanie BRANDON STEPHANIE

NO CHRISTIAN

Everyone accusing each other of being frozen

NO YOURE FROZEN

- Andrew: Let’s all act like we’re frozen

Steph: I see Andrew acting like hes frozen

Betsy: Watching you do that is killing me

- Listening to the cast recording for the first time together

Stephanie: Why was I the a-hole that couldn’t be there???

Christian: That’s a question only you can answer

- Betsys husband came in everyones like BETSY LOOK OUT

Christian: that scared the shit out of me

- What is marvins last name and what was his line of work

Christian: we definitely said it at some point right? (They didnt) but he was in advertising. What was the last name? Gardens? O’Malley?

- Andrew: Betsys gone oh no

Betsy: I’m right here!!!

Andrew: She’s giving birth (again)

Stephanie: Betsy Wolfe is a ceiling

- Brandon: Welcome back Anthony. You’re here now.

Anthony singing merrily we roll along over Betsy trying to tell a story

Christian: STOP SMOKING POT IN YOUR BEDROOM ANTHONY

- Betsy: Steve (Steven Sondheim) comes to the door I call him steve

Into the woods is the reason Betsy is in theatre

- Betsy: Andrew was nervous singing at the tonys for Book of Mormon and he got dry mouth he sang like 😬I BELIEVE and he licked his lips so much during the song.

Brandon: Did you have a boner then too?

Andrew: GUYS DONT BE DICKS

Stephanie: It’ll be like dry mouth, boner

Andrew: BETSY YOU FUCKIN BITCH ITS ACTUALLY NOT THAT BAD

Stephanie: Bets maybe we should wrap it up

- Brandon sings MARRIAGE PROPOSAL

EVERYONE TELLING HIM TO STOP SINGING I took a video it was beautiful might post that later

- “Tracie Thomas from Lent!”

Tracie having stage fright

Tracie: Billy porter said “oh child we all forget the words” and walked away

- Anthony said WHO SHAT THE BED in four jews once

Anthony: That’s my contribution. Steph got her line, I got who shat the bed

- Steph: We lost andrew oh no

Christian: Um, we lost andrew ten minutes ago. Yeah when Brandon started singing

- Then Betsy sang a song by Bill Finn beautiful

- Steph: Wear your masks and eat pork on wednesdays

That was it!! I hope you enjoyed and people who were there if I got anything wrong that’s my human error it was hard to note everything I wanted to. Smooches! Byee

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