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napakmahal · 5 months

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My Way Of Life (L.E.S pt. 2)

I would like to point out the I didn’t realize I should have written a part 2 L.E.S but here we go pookies

After getting walked in on by your not-boyfriends little brother, best friend and robot it was hard to think about what it is your life had come to. Where you and Tadashi dating? What if he didn’t want to date you? Maybe he just liked loving on you like you were his girlfriend but he didn’t want a girlfriend. It was possible, people did it all the time. The rest of the day you remained pretty silent, until you got home and decided to try and call him. Recap what had just happened.

He didn’t pick up, but no big deal you guys were friends so double calling wasn’t an issue. But he didn’t pick up that time either. That’s when the inevitable and desperate question popped into your head; Were you just meant to be a secret? Something to laugh off? No way- Tadashi was so sweet and honest there’s no way he would do that to you.

But was he more sweet than honest? Was he so sweet he didn’t want to hurt your feelings so he’d rather ghost you than pick up your FaceTimes? This very minor and awkward situation had you questioning all your years of friendship with him and your feelings about him.

——————————————————————————

Across town, in the small house above the closed Lucky Cat Café Tadashi had set off to do some damage control. Normally by then he’d be asleep or wishing you goodnight but not tonight. Tonight he’d been on a group FaceTime call with all his friends and his little brother listening sitting at the kitchen table next to him. All six of them having a striking conversation.

“Guys its not a big deal.” He rubbed his head his friends spin on 20 million questions.

“NOT A BIG DEAL?!” Gogo practically screeched through the phone while taking off her rice water face mask. “T, it is a big deal.”

While moisturizing his dreads Wasabi butt in, “I would like to add that I am indeed a victim.”

“As am I!” Hiro shouted. “Seriously, you disgust me!”

Tadashi gave his little brother the finger before retuning back to their conversation. “I mean, what do you want me to say?”

Honey Lemon looked up from painting her nails. Her blonde hair pushed up in a floppy bun. “Umm we want you to explain!”

“Dead-ass, man. Whatever happened to ‘nah y/n, she’s not my girlfriend. We’re just hanging out.’” Fred was sitting on his bed, holding his phone hovering above his face.

“Well, she’s not my girlfriend. We never talked about stuff like that. Just figured she was happy with what we were doing and I didn’t want to ruin that.” He reasoned. In his mind, bringing up the idea of a monogamous committed relationship to a girl he wasn’t even sure wanted to date him sounded like social suicide. For all he knew you could never have wanted a boyfriend to begin with!

Wasabi wrapped his hair up, “Do you want her to be your girlfriend?”

“W-well,” Tadashi was stuttering. Of course he wanted her to be his girlfriend. He’d nearly lost his mind planning their entire future in his head once the very first time she kissed his cheek.

On a particularly pathetic Valentines day a few years ago, Tadashi was wallowing in front of all his single friends. ‘I’ve been dating since I was 16, this is so depressing. Where is she?!’ And after he met you he was sure you were ‘she’.

But it was complicated. If he said it out loud, would he get his hopes up? Would she eventually find out and then never want to speak to him again? Questions, questions, questions.

“Okay fine!” He aggressively ran his fingers through his freshly washed black hair. “Yes, I want to be her boyfriend and take her out on dates and love her forever. Yes I do!”

The call and the room went dead with silence at the loud confession so dramatic you’d think he was getting proposed to. Until of course Hiro put on a disgusted face and nearly gagged. “Holy shit, ew!”

“You’re ew!” Tadashi snapped back. “What are you even doing up still, go to bed! Your brain has not yet fully developed and you need little boy sleep. Go!”

Hiro eventually did go upstair to their shared bedroom but the group was not done talking.

“Wait okay,” Honey popped. “After you guys got caught, did you talk about it at all?”

“After it happened she just laughed and went home.” He explained.

“Well did you call her?”

Tadashi shrugged, “No. She called me earlier but I was in the bathroom.”

Fred’s face contorted with curiosity. “Did you call her back?”

“No, I called you guys first.”

“OH MY FUCKING GOD!”

“T, THAT’S SO BAD!”

“WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU DO THAT?”

“I’M NOT THE BRIGHTEST BULB IN THE BOX BUT EVEN I KNOW BETTER”

They’d bombarded him with loud expressions of anger and disbelief. I mean how could he? You called him twice- not once-twice. And he still didn’t call you back. How could someone as smart as him make such a stupid decision?

“T, are you on drugs?” Gogo asked aggresivly. “Like genuinly.”

“No, Go. I’m not on drugs.”

“Really?” She sounded surprised. “Because your logic sounds like someone who’se been smoking a little too much jazz cabbage.”

Damn. Had he really fucked up that badly? The truth is, Tadashi didn’t call you back because he was scared of why you were trying to call him. But the more he thought about that the more he realized Gogo was right. Had he tripped and gotten poked with a used needle on the streets? This didn’t even feel like something he would do. Whenever you and him had to talk to each other you’d just go out and say it. And he’s the one who made sure you’d never keep things from each other.

He felt like such a moron. All his brain cells full of knowledge on how to combined chemical structures, and apply the laws of physics in all situations were proving to be completely and utterly USELESS!

Later that night once the call had ended and the whole house was quiet, Tadashi decided to send you a text. It being so late he hadn’t really expected you to answer and yet you did.

T: Hey, sorry about today. I know it was super awkward.

Y: It’s cool, don’t worry about it.

T: I feel really shitty about today so how about I take you out. Tomorrow, will you let me buy you dinner?

Y: As long as you let me buy you dessert

Finally, something the both of you could feel good at. For Tadashi it was nice to know you didn’t hate his guts and never want to see his face ever again. And for you, it was nice that he reached out first letting you know that he did not cast you aside once you’d been found out.

Before he went to bed that night, Tadashi looked at his wrapped finger and smiled at it.

——————————————————————————

This was turning out to be torture. The dinner plans you two had made the night before that had once made you feel good about the whole situation were now the very same plans that had you staring into your glass of lemon water like your life depended on it.

Tadashi wanted to throw up- no he was going to throw up. You two had been seated for nearly 5 minutes and nobody said anything. But you looked so pretty. To him you were always pretty but something about the whole situation made him feel like singing you a Frank Sinatra song. But it’s not like this was a date…right? Nope- just two friends having dinner. That’s it.

You couldn’t do this anymore. It was like all the air was just sucked out of the room. You needed to talk about what happened but how could you? In public? With people around and where the waiter could just come in to check up on you. You wanted to go home, but you wanted Tadashi to come home with you. You just weren’t sure if he wanted to.

“So how was your day?” He managed to squeeze out without puking.

You quickly replied. “Good.”

“Oh that’s good.”

Jesus. Fucking. Christ.

To you, his seasick face made you think you were disgusting him. Like he’d only offered to buy you dinner out of obligation. ‘Sorry I chewed on your face in front of brother and best friend, here let me take you out to dinner so I don’t feel bad about never speaking to you again.’ But even to your insecurities that sounded ridiculous, so you decided to test the waters.

“Are you okay?” You leaned over and touched his hand. “You look sick.”

Once you’d touched his hand it felt like you’d shot ice cold water into his veins. Shocked, but maybe it was a good shocked. If you were touching him you still mut have cared or tolerated him in one way or another.

“I’m fine, it’s just…awkward.” He honestly communicated.

You couldn’t argue with that. This was beyond awkward. In fact if you looked up the word awkward in the dictionary you’d probably find a snapshot of this dinner.

“Bad awkward or good awkward?”

Shit, what answer did you want him to give?

“Uhh I’m not sure. What do you think?” Smooth T, reeaall smooth.

You ran your finger against the rim of your water glass. “Bad, I mean we haven’t really been talking this whole time.”

“Yeah this is weird.” He admitted. You guys were always talking. About everything and anything.

“Unless,” Damnit y/n just rip the band aid off. “You don’t want to talk to me.”

Tadashi felt his stomach gurgle. Oh no. “What? Why wouldn’t I want to talk to you?”

“Well, you didn’t call me back yesterday and when I got here you barely looked at me.”

All incredibly valid points. God he was such an idiot. Grown ass man, acting the way he was acting.

“I’m so sorry, love. I don’t know why I’m acting like this.” He plopped his head in his hands adn that was when you’d finally had enough of this game of kiddie tug-of-war. If you didn’t ask it now, you’d never ask it later.

“Tadashi,” You placed your elbows on the table and looked directly at him. “Do you not like me?”

In the amount of time it took you to ask that question Tadashi had gone from wanting to puke, to wanting to cry. He scooted his chair over to yours and grabbed both of your hands. “What are you talking about? Y/n, of course I like you.”

“But you wouldn’t even call me? The second I officially stopped being a secret you didn’t want to talk to me. What was I supposed to think?”

“I didn’t call you because I thought you didn’t want to hear from me. Not because I don’t like you.” He confessed. “I thought you were only calling to get rid of me, so I called my friends back and asked them what to do about it. Please baby, I am so sorry I made you feel that way.”

You didn’t say anything after that confession. In fact you didn’t need to. You just placed your forehead onto his and rubbed your nose against his. Your waiter had walked by trying to collect your guys’s orders but hastily walked away when she noticed you were having quite the moment. The anxiety you had about having such a deep conversation like the one you just did in public had suddenly just disappeared.

“You know,” You whispered. “Sometimes I feel like I hate everyone in the world but you.”

“That’s not healthy.” He whispered back.

You laughed in each others faces for what felt like forever in the middle of the restaurant before deciding to leave without ordering anything. You two weren’t all that hungry. But as soon as you walked outside, Tadashi’s body betrayed him and he puked in a trashcan on the side of the street.

“Oh my god are you okay?” You rubbed his back while he retched.

With his hand held over his mouth he admitted, “I’m so sorry it’s not you, hun. I’ve just been holding that in for the past twenty minutes.”

And yes, that very same night Tadashi did ask-beg- to be your boyfriend. You obviously said yes. And obviously, Hiro was going to stuff his bed with different shaped pillows to make it look like he wasn’t spending the night at your place.

#baymax #big hero 6 #big hero six #hiro hamada #tadashi hamada #bh6 x reader #disney #fanfic #hiro hamada x reader #tadashi hamada x reader #napakmahal #frank sinatra #L.E.S

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theroundbartable · 24 days

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(sending hugs)

what are your thoughts about aithusa? personally i love her way to much, but she rarely comes up in fandom discourse

HEY :D Thoughts about AIthusa, huh? I have many of those. Thoughts, I mean. In my brain. They like to swim around and create a whole mess of things sometimes.

I think the reason why Aithusa doesn't come up in fandom discourse often is because there isn't very much to say. Aithusa was born, then color coded as a sign for the golden future of Camelot and was then abandoned by Merlin. Tortured by a crazy guy. Then raised by Morgana and used to create the sword that later killed Arthur. Whenever they come up in fandom discouse, it's mostly about Merlin doing his job as Dragon Lord right or wrong. But you wanted my thoughts, so I'm gonna allow my head to spin weird shit around the ungendered Dragon. (That is why I will use they/them pronouns for Aithusa.) When it comes to Aithusa's name, not the canon translation, I mean what it literally means, it's hard to find, since they used old English for the language of magic, and I think Greek for the language of the Dragon Lords (which doesn't necessarily have to apply to the Dragon names) and I haven't seen anyone make a post about it. All I get from Google translate is "Hey you" in Gaelic and that's a bit useless. Or well, this:

The automatic language recognition in Google would let me interpret Aithusa as a gift to the world. Or Arthur, depending on your shipping interests. Or, you know, if I could make up the Old English maybe pseudo-parts of the word (the writers were very lazy in BBC Merlin, they are literally quoting Beowulf when Merlin magics the blue ball in the poisoned chalice.). Something fitting I found in my old English dictionary is agan, meaning to possess, and to own, and thus (spelled with a thorn which my keyboard doesn't have) meaning as follows. So, in my absolutely amateurish and interpretational, and way too far reaching ways, I would say Aithusa could mean: A(gan) thus (a): To own the future.

(Again, you asked for my thoughts, this is not canon and probably pointless, I just needed to go down this route first.)

In the fandom wiki, we find THESE informations on Aithusa.

So, things we do know are very few

Aithusa is a baby

Aithusa was tortured and is therefore crippled

Aithusa cannot talk

Aithusa probably has Stockholm Syndrom because of Morgana

But you know, I think it's very interesting to know that Aithusa is the Light of the Sun, the literal sign for a Golden Future and that very sign can be hurt by a mere human. Not only does this mean that humans can kill Dragons (the Dragon lore doesn't make any sense, I swear to god) but it's also meant to be symbolism. Merlin, just like Arthur, is shown to be his own doom through Aithusa. They are hidden, tortured, kept from living their truth, abandoned by everyone who should be leading and protecting them.

With Aithusa being born it means that at that point, Merlin had already fulfilled his destiny. At this point in time, the golden age is already there and it should have been a sign for Merlin to speak up about his magic. He never did, that's why Aithusa remains mute. And just like magic itself, when harmed or in danger, Aithusa can easily be used for evil.

Apart from the symbolism and their part in Arthur's death, Aithusa doesn't contribute much to the story, I think. Yes, they console Morgana and they are like the continuation of the Dragon lineage, but that's ultimately pointless. Aithusa will be, inevitably, be the last Dragon. Which is honestly really cruel, but again, parallel to Merlin himself. That's where Aithusa's arc ends, unfortuntaley. Personally, knowing all that, I find Aithusa hard to use as the character they are in canon. With what little defines their character, you have to ultimately change everything about them to use them in fun fics and comics and stuff. That's why they end up as a little dog creature so often.

Don't get me wrong, I love Aithusa. But I love FANON Aithusa, just like I prefer fanon Sir Leon over canon Sir Leon. Because fanon Aithusa is like a domesticated chicken that Merlin keeps in his rooms or fights custody over with Morgana while Arthur is either oblivious, supportive, or being gaslit. But maybe I am overlooking a lot of things. So, if any of you like to disagree or add anything to my points, feel free to engage ^^

#bbc merlin #merlin #Aithusa #faq #ask #answer #merlin meta #sorry if this wasn't what you expected #I never know what to do with Aithusa

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bit-odd-innit · 1 year

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Fic: Somewhere That’s Green

[based on a post I made about Eddie’s future]

It’s a hole in the wall just off the main drag, the kind of place you can’t find unless you know to look. In a previous life it had been a pizzeria, which explained the bright green vinyl awning Eddie had no intention of replacing. He’d kept the pick-up window, too, used it to host “office hours.” (“Office hours” was supposed to mean “deliver personalized music recommendations to interested passers-by.” Now it means “help harried, double-parked parents reschedule music lessons.”)

He’d also kept the apartment upstairs. They have a house now—a nice one, with a wrap-around porch and a big backyard and a cluster of hedges Steve always insists are “a mess”—but when Eddie trips into an inventory hole and loses track of time, it’s nice to have a place to crash. If it’s not a school night sometimes Steve joins him, and they’ll relive the halcyon days of their early twenties, buoyed by cheap beer, diner curly fries, and giddy infatuation. (The infatuation has only grown and flourished even as his tolerance for salty food has withered. Acid reflux is a bitch.)

He’s happy they kept the apartment. He happy knowing that if someone needs it—someone scared, broke, desperate for a lifeline and a scrap of no-strings-attached kindness—it’s something he can provide.

Initial plans had been to focus on music, just music. It was supposed to be the utopic all-metal record store of Eddie’s nightmares. But as he started to build stock, he remembered how hard it had been to find merch for the things he liked. How a pin or a patch or poster he’d dug up at a garage sale four towns over made him feel more seen than anything on offer at the local mini-mall. How he wanted to be a hub for the weird shit not everyone liked, but the people who did loved. His horrible little magpie brain fluttered from shiny thing to shiny thing, and by the time opening day rolled around the store was a one-stop shop for all things music, merch and whatever wacky knick-knacks tickled Eddie’s fancy. Or horrified Steve. Or both. Both was best.

The Corroded Coffin guys slotted in easily. Francis always liked doing promo for their gigs, was good at it, too. But by the early 2000s, his methods were apparently so outdated his daughter begged to let her take over. (“He’s stapling fliers to telephone poles, Uncle Eddie. You don’t even have a website.”

“What is a telephone pole covered in fliers if not the working man’s web-ed site?”

“Oh my God give me your credit card I’m buying you a domain name.”

“A what?”)

Jeff got his CPA and took over the financials, reeling Eddie in whenever he was struck by the urge to make a impulsive, outlandish purchase. (“I genuinely don’t understand how you make money.”

“It’s cause I don’t do my taxes.”

“I do your taxes. At a great personal expense.”)

Gareth was instrumental (heh…) in building up the music program—soundproofing the basement and hiring instructors and coordinating concerts and organizing payment plans, all the nitty-gritty non-music stuff that made Eddie’s head spin. At some point it just made the most sense for Eddie to cede control, let him operate it however he saw fit. (“This is your baby, dude. It’s a baby that took form within my own, much larger baby. But it’s yours.”

“I’m touched by your words and appalled by your phrasing.”

“That’s the only way I could have said it.”)

(Gareth also once described the store as an “Elevated Hot Topic.” Eddie still hasn’t decided when he’s going to kick his ass.)

 Momentum grew. Ideas compounded ideas. A kid asked how to sew a patch to his backpack and it snowballed into the Build Your Own Battlevest Workshop. Wayne suggested knocking out the connecting wall between the walk-in freezer and the pantry, and now thrice weekly Eddie runs table-top games for varying age-sets and skill-levels. (At Steve’s request, the elementary school group is called H-E-DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS FIRE CLUB. Not because he thinks it needs to be censored. He just thinks it’s funny.) (He’s right.)

It was supposed to be a record store but now it’s so much more. Now there are listening parties and movie screenings and little league teams with his store’s name on the back of their jerseys and and and—

Eddie used to think, if he got lucky, he’d last a year. Now he’s closing in on 30. He was profiled by the local newspaper. They called him “a pillar of the community.”

Wild.

It’s a warm, sunny April morning. He’s sitting at the takeout window, sipping coffee from the bottom half of a teapot-teacup combo that reads, in a menacing blood-red font, THIS FREAK DRINKS TEA. His hair is gathered in a loose braid, the ends still damp from his post-run shower. (Sometime in their mid-thirties Steve tricked him into maintaining a consistent cardio routine, and now he’s the type of person who gets out of bed at the crack of dawn to knock out an “easy three.” He’s a monster, a husk of his former self. A husk with a much-improved lung capacity and thighs that can juice a watermelon but nonetheless HUSK.) The middle school is about a half mile from the shop; he pulls faces at all the students filtering past. (Steve’s kids, current and former, refer to Eddie exclusively as Mr. Munson’s Husband. It never fails to thrill him.)

He’s leaning back to flip the record piping through the store’s speakers (“Dustin I don’t care if it’s ‘easier’ to ‘create a Spotify account,’ whatever that means. We play vinyl only! Let me be pretentious about this one thing!”) when he hears a meek, polite cough coming from just beneath the window. He peers out and on the sidewalk stands a girl. She’s small, too little to be one of Steve’s. She clutches the strap of her backpack, blue eyes huge with nerves and determination.

“Hail and well met, weary traveler!” He’s speaking in what Steve calls his Dork Voice, the slightly tuned-down version he uses to put shy kids at ease. “How might I be of assistance?” The girl purses her lips, sets her shoulders, shakes her shaggy bangs out of her face. Eddie thinks suddenly of Nancy and Robin and his heart clenches.

“Do you like games?” She asks.

He smiles softly. Drops the act. “Yeah.” He rests his scarred cheek in the cradle of his palm. “I like games. Do you like games?”

The dam breaks.

“Yes!” She replies at once, breathless with enthusiasm. “My family plays a lot of board games, like Game of Life and Monopoly, and they’re okay but kind of boring, but my brother taught me how to play Settlers of Catan and I really liked that, and my friends and I played Werewolf at a sleepover but we made up a bunch of extra rules to make it harder, and my cousin showed me this video game where the ending changes based on what choices you make and that’s so cool—”

“Alright, slugger.” Eddie can’t help but laugh. “What game are you looking to play?”

The girl collects herself. “Okay,” she says. “Okay, so. So I like it in games where there are rules, but also you can make stuff up? And you can do something weird that might ruin everything but also might pay off? And sometimes you have to work with other people to accomplish your goal, but alliances can break?” Eddie nods. “So there’s this one game. It sounds like so much fun, but nobody I know plays it. They play it on this show I like, well, okay, it’s not really a show, it’s, uh, okay do you know what a podcast is?” Eddie beams.

Steve swapped study hall coverage so he could pop in for lunch. Tonight is parent-teacher conferences, which means Steve’ll be home late, which means Eddie will get absorbed in a project and either crash upstairs or stumble home well after Steve’s gone to bed, which means they’ve got to snatch the time together they can get. They split a sandwich, a salmon burger from Costco Eddie threw in the air fryer and smashed up with avocado and grilled poblano pepper. (”It’s heart healthy!” “You’re heart healthy.” “Aw.” “I meant that as an insult.” “I’m not taking it as one, mwah mwah mwah.”) Eddie eats too fast, as he often does, and drags his nails over the veins of Steve’s forearm to distract himself from his gastrointestinal tract turning inside out.

“🎶Myyyy babyyyy myyyyyy babyyyyyy,” he hums against the shell of Steve’s ear. “You’reeee my babyyyyy sayyyy it to meeeeee🎶.” “Alright,” he huffs, tapping his fingers to the knobby bone of Eddie’s wrist. He presses a kiss to the underside of Eddie’s jaw and rises. “I gotta get back.” He slings his messenger bag over his shoulder, gathers the papers he’d promised he’d grade but didn’t. Eddie watches him readjust, watches him smooth down the salt-and-pepper hairs dusting his temples, watches him push his glasses up the bridge of his nose. He catches Eddie watching and asks, slyly, “What?”

Eddie wants to say, I love you. He wants to say, you’ve made me happier than I ever thought I could be. He wants to say, I’m so grateful I built this life with you.

But he’s still himself, so what he says is, “Those khakis make your ass look great.”

Steve scoffs, and with a bitchy eye roll he sinks his weight onto his back foot and says, “I KNOW,” and there he is. There’s the man he married. He looks over his shoulder before he leaves, his honey-warm eyes liquifying Eddie’s spine.

“Hey,” he murmurs. “I love you too.” Eddie kisses him and kisses him and kisses him. Pretty good life.

#steddie #stranger things #eddie munson #steve harrington #my fanfic

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kay-i-guess · 1 year

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snow on the beach | Percy Jackson

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 | Percy Jackson x gn!Reader

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 | Swearing, a monster

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 | an unlikely meeting results in something fucking beautiful

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 | based on this request <3

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 | 1.4k ish

Holly shit I need to clear my head. I hear our apartment door slam behind me as I rush down the stairs. My head was reeling, why was this happening and why am I the only one who can see it? I feel their cool air hit my face and I just start walking not sure where I'm going. I'm brought back into my thoughts at the sound of a car horn. I stop and look around I know where I am just a few blocks from my family apartment. I rub my arms to keep myself warm even though it's still early winter it's a cold day and my fleece isn't doing much to keep the brisk wind out.

I bite my lip as I try to get my thoughts together. Not going to lie to myself my entire life has been pretty wacky. But the last year has been something else. Today was the typing point, the tv was on with the news of some massive fire, but I could have sworn in the crowd amongst the smoke I saw 3 massive dogs, and not like mastiff size like a rhino size with glowing red eyes. When I pointed them out my family all thought I was joking and I played it off like that but the truth was I've been seeing things like that on and off for months now. I know what I saw but no one else can see it and it infuriates me.

I scan my eyes wildly for some answer as if one would be on the streets of new york.

Fuck it, if no one else can see them then ill just have to pretend to be like them, I've been doing it my whole life just because now I have to add giant scary dogs to the list doesn't mean I can have a giant life crisis.

I turn to head back but I stop in my tracks just a few meters away was one of them staring right at me. Okay, maybe the pretending could start when I was safe inside my home. I turn the corner and start running I can hear the pounding of its feet, or maybe that's my heart I turn to check if it's behind me but suddenly I slam into something. I tumble onto the sidewalk and I feel burning pain on one side of my body.

“Oh my gods I’m so sorry are you okay” I hear a voice say

“Im alive if that's what you're asking” I push my body up so I can see who is talking, and my eyes widen as I see what he's holding “fuck dude is it even legal to have that!” I scramble away from the buy with the might I add very deadly weapon”

“I think so?” his eyes widen as if releasing something “Wait you can see it”

I wince as I stand up “You mean the fucking sword in your hand? yeah. I can see it” I scan my injuries “Dude these are my favourite pants!” where my knee and leg hit the ground there was a giant tear

“You’re more worried about your pants than the gash in your leg?” he says jokingly

“Skin will heal my pants will not” I eye him “Who are you anyway and why were you surprised I could see your sword?”

“Oh um this might sound weird but do you ever see anything” Taking in my bewildered expression he tries to explain “Like weird things and other people cont see them or see something else”

My eyes widen in shock my brain is telling me to run as far as I can but for some reason, I blurt out “Like the monster dogs?”

He seemed to be thinking then his eyes lit up “Yes! The ones with red eyes?”

“That's what I was running from dude! There's one a few blocks around the corner!”

“Oh! Why didn't you say so?” his eyes snapped from me to the corner of the street and back to me “Meet me here tomorrow at noon okay?”

“Sure?” I’m confused, my head is spinning and the pain from my fall is starting to kick in

“I'll answer all your questions I promise but right now go somewhere safe. Now!”

I do just that as I sprint away taking a different route to my home.

Later that night I was lying in my bed my thoughts spiralling.

Who was the (quite attractive) guy?

Why can he see the same stuff as I can?

Why can I see it?

I groan as I roll over in bed, I can't deal with this right now. Even though I would see him in a few hours it felt like I would have to wait a lifetime.

✭✭✭

I tap my foot as my eyes dart around the street, I had gotten there early due to my nerves. I gnaw on my lip. What if he died? I would never know, and I would never get answers.

I glance around again and this time I spot the sea-green eyes I was looking for, I smile out of relief and almost break into a grin as he smiles back from across the street. I can't help it this guy is seriously cute.

“Oh thank god I had thought you had died” I grab his arm pulling him towards a coffee shop to get out of the cold air.

“Awwww missed me already?” he teases as I push the door open and step inside.

“Don't flatter yourself, you owe me answers.”

We slip into a booth in the back where no one would hear us.

“So?” I ask

“So what?” he asked cluelessly

I roll my eyes “Well I know nothing about you except you can see stuff like me, a name would be helpful for starters”

“Percy Jackson at your service, and you are?” he extends his hand

“Y/N L/N, a pleasure to meet you” I shake his hand and giggle slightly at the formalness of it.

Percy explains about the gods and monsters and how it was all real in our world, then about how he was a demigod and went to a camp with all of them.

I nod slowly “Okay” I can hear my voice shake slightly and I take a deep breath “Cool, cool, cool monsters and Greek gods I can get my head around

Percy tilts his head slightly scanning my face “You seem to be taking this well”

I laugh lightly “If I'm doing well I hate to see others, but yeah after what I've seen in my life it's not hard to put a reason behind it, even if the reason is slightly mind-blowing” I joke

Percy smiles but then scans my face again,

“What?” I ask he furrows his eyebrows “You keep looking at me like you're trying to figure something out.” I explain

He sighs “I'm just trying to figure out if you're a half-blood”

I cut him off “Like you?”

“Yeah like me, but if you were we should have found you already,” his face told me it was a long story for another day “This might sound weird but do you have both of your parents?”

I laugh thinking he's joking but I stop when I see no humour in his face “I do yea” I tense I don't like where this conversation was going

“Then you probably like my mom, she is completely mortal but can see through the mist”

“The what? Like fog?” my head was spinning

“No, like a magical veil”

I shake my head “Can we talk about something else for a minute I think my head is going to explode,”

“Of course, I remember when I first learned about all this.”

I smile gratefully “Tell me about your friends, from this camp place”

He tells me all about Tyson Grover Annabeth and Jason, it's obvious how much he cares about this place. We're both smiling and laughing, it was the happiest I felt in a while. His smile was contagious.

After not long enough I look out the window and realized it was getting late

“I should go, my dad is waiting for me” I sigh

“Oh okay,” he sounds as disappointed as I felt “Can I walk you back?”

The question takes me by surprise

“Only if you want of course-”

I cut him off “I would like that”

We grab our coats and I start leading the way.

Too quickly I stop at our apartment complex

“So this is goodbye?” I ask

“For now” he smiles reassuringly

“Oh fuck it” I mumble and lean forward to kiss him on the cheek

His eyes widen and a smile grows on his face “You missed” he jokes

My nervousness melts into happiness “I guess il have to try again”

I pull his head down to meet mine, before our lips meet I whisper “I kinda have a crush on you Percy Jackson”

“Me too” and with that he closes the gap between us.

As we pull apart I can feel the coolness on my exposed skin, I look up and gasp

“It's snowing!”

Our eyes meet and time feels frozen for a second, I'm afraid to speak too scared of ruining the perfect moment. It's like snow on the beach unlikely but fucking stunning.

#percy jackson x reader #percy jackon and the olympians #percy pjo #pjo #riordan books #request

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sawtastic-sideblog · 6 months

Text

Christmas Chainshipping

Tw: talks of homophobia, cute chainshipping, my chaotic brain nor braining

Happy Holidays and enjoy.

Adam hated Christmas. He hated the christmas shoppers, traffic, songs, decorations, all of it. He can't help it, of course, it's a lonely time of year for him.

His father disowned him and won't let his mother contact him, not that she would, and his siblings just didn't care. He did what was best and what he thought would hurt less and moved to a different city, but the longing of familiarity, home, and comfort reminded him of what he had lost.

He shoves the door to the breakroom open and stomps to the time clock. His coworkers giving him odd looks.

"Good morning, Adam," Abigail says sweetly.

"It's not good. It's just morning," Adam responds.

"Happy aggravated morning to you, then, Adam."

"I only got an hour and a half of sleep last night. Sorry to be short with you, Abs," Adam explains.

"Maybe you should see a doctor about that. I mean, you haven't gotten any sleep since the day I met you. That's been three years, son," Penny says as she stirs creamer and sugar in her coffee. Adam makes some kind of noise of acknowledgment and annoyance.

"It's too damn early, Pen."

"I know, sweetie, I know," she responds, giving Adam's shoulder a comforting pat. Adam quickly grabs his radio and name tag and runs out to the floor where he is greeted by his manager.

"I know you don't like being over in fitting room, but I need you over there steaming tablecloths for the display tables and processing merchandise. Mads is over there, so it shouldn't be too bad for you. Oh lord, two people who hate mornings, here early in the morning, in one spot. This should be fun," Carla, the senior assistant manager explains. Adam nods silently and trudges over to the fitting room.

"Hey, Mads."

"Hey, Adam."

"Too early for this shit."

"Amen. Steamer is preheating. I'm starting on shoes. Carla said once one of us is done we can help sensor makeup and the handbags and luggage are coming this way once they break down the truck."

"Got it. How many tablecloths? Do you know?"

"Two I think. Harry brought out two more tables."

"I hate Christmas."

"Were you here for Black Friday?"

"Yeah. Toys and kids stuff."

"Oh yeah. I was in home decor. Never again."

"I don't know what it is about that day, but it turns everyone into animals."

"Truth."

The two fall into a comfortable silence. Mads working on getting the shoes ready for display and Adam steaming the bright green tablecloths. Once Adam is done he gets to work on processing the makeup and organizing it for the beauty associate.

"What are you writing?" Mads asks and she watches Adam scribble something onto a sticky note.

"The contents of boxes. I always do this. It makes it easier on whoever has to put the stuff out."

"Smart."

The silence falls over them again until Mads is sent to break. When she has walked away a short, brunette girl runs up.

"Hi."

"Hi, looking to try on something?"

"No, my friend over there thinks you're cute. The blonde guy," the girl says, pointing to a very red faced blonde man and laughing brunette man. Adam must admit the guy is kind of attractive, but he's not interested in dating this close to the holidays. Not when it requires actually having to buy gifts. Nope. Not right now anyway. Maybe for New Year, so he can have a kiss at midnight.

"Well, I'm flattered. Tell him I say thank you."

"Could he get your number or I give you his?"

"Oh, uh, um, not right now. I'm not looking," Adam says, pulling at the back of his neck.

"Oh, okay."

"Check back with me after Christmas."

"Okay! Will do!" The girl starts to walk away. She quickly spins on the ball of her foot dramatically. "His name is Lawrence, by the way."

"Adam," he says, pointing to himself. He gives a wave to the two men. The brunette gives a short wave with an amused smile on his face. The blonde guy, Lawrence, gives a shy wave, his face still red. The girl waves and runs back. Adam can hear the girl when she talks to her friends.

"His name is Adam!" The girl shouts then is quiet again, but keeps talking. Lawrence's face falls a little as he looks back up to Adam, who gives him a polite smile. The trio start walking, just wandering the store. Adam catches glimpses of them and every time he sees Lawrence, his heart feels funny. Almost like he's yearning for the taller man.

A few days later, Adam is running registers with Mads. They're the only two people scheduled up front, but they don't mind because the rush is over and they've already cleaned everything, so now they're just chatting.

"Okay, but hear me out," Mads starts, "Jack could have fit on the door."

"Did you not see the documentary thing James Cameron did? While, yes, he could have fit on the door, they wouldn't have both survived it. It would've been too cold for them. Plus, you seen in the movie that Jack tried to get on the door, but it nearly capsized with them both on it. Pay attention, Mads."

"What are you? Some kind of doctor?"

"No, but I am. He's right, the cold would have killed them. Hypothermia would have set in quicker." The duo look towards the voice and see it's the guy from the other day. Lawrence was his name, right? Adam gets over his initial shock and grins smugly at his friend.

"Told ya so."

"Shut up. If we weren't infront of a customer right now, I'd pummel you into next week, Stanheight!"

"Pummel? You'd pummel me?"

"Yeah, pummel, what about it?" Mads asks defensively. Adam chuckles and turns to the customer.

"Find everything okay, sir?" Adam asks as he logs into the register.

"Fine, thank you. How are you, Adam?" Lawrence asks, trying to gage Adam's attitude. It seems a friendly one.

"I'm good and yourself?"

"Good. Happy it's closing time, huh?"

"Oh yeah, I hear my bed calling my name. I have tomorrow off, so I'm just gonna sleep all day."

"That's fun. No other plans?"

"Nope. Just me, my mattress, and probably some Skyrim."

"That sounds like fun. You have a good night."

"You too, sir, and come back to see us," Adam says as he hands Lawrence his receipt. Lawrence leans a little closer and speaks to where only Adam can hear.

"Call me 'sir' again and I may have to join you in your bed. Goodnight, Adam."

Adam's breath hitches as he watches the taller man confidently limp out the door. Adam can feel the blood rush to his cheeks. He starts to walk to the breakroom.

"Hey, where are you going?"

"To get some water," Adam says a little too quickly.

Mads cocks her head to the side in confusion before logging into her register and ringing up customers. Adam was flushed the rest of the night.

Having the two days off in a row left Adam recharged and ready to face the long shift ahead of him. After about a hour, he wants to go home again. He's sick of this Christmas rush bullshit. Just buy your gifts online like a normal person.

"Jesus H. Christ on a crutch while on a mother fucking bike," Adam mutters to himself as he pushes his way through a crowd who are standing in the middle of everything. They're just chattering on and on about how this one girl is three months pregnant even though her husband has been deployed for eight months.

"Hi, Adam," a voice says. Adam is about to roll his eyes before he realizes he recognizes the voice. He spins around and greets the girl and the brunette man. Lawrence is no where in sight.

"He's in the bathroom," the man says when he sees the questioning look in his eyes.

"I wasn't-"

"It's okay. You like him. It's cute," the girl says.

"He made me uncomfortable the other day. I'd like to avoid him."

"Good comfortable or bad comfortable?" The man asks.

"I don't get what you mean, dude," Adam replies as he straightens up a bunch of barbie convertible boxes.

"Well, a good comfortable is the tingly feeling you get in your pants," the man is interrupt by the girl smacking him.

"Mark! We are in public!"

"So? You've said worse."

"Yeah, but not infront of Lawrence's love interest."

"What's the bad uncomfortable?" Adam asks, regaining control of the conversation.

"If he made you feel skeeved out and you wanted to call the police," the man, Mark, answers. Adam considers this a minute, feeling his face heat up.

"The good uncomfortable," he whispers. Mark chuckles and the girl, that Adam still doesn't know the name of, hides her smile behind her hand.

"There you two are," an all too familiar voice calls from behind Adam. Mark throws an arm around Adam's shoulders, well closer to his neck really, and pulls him behind a rack of infant clothes.

"Listen, Adam, this guy really likes you. He's the one that has made us come in here for weeks. He saw you about two months ago and he was gone. Head over heels. We were here to find Amanda a dress for a funeral," Mark explains quietly.

"Amanda is the girl with you?"

"Yeah. He hasn't shut up about you. I know you said you're not into dating until after Christmas, but, if you're comfortable with it, get to know the man. For us?"

"I think I could get to know him. But that's it."

"Heard. Come on," Mark walks with Adam to the tables stacked high with boxed toys. Lawrence and Amanda are having a whispered conversation and don't notice th other pair until Adam clears his throat.

"Hi, I'm Adam Faulkner-Standheight, I'm twenty six, and I like photography, napping, reading, and knitting."

"Knitting?" Mark asks.

"Stabbing people is illegal and knitting is kind of like legal stabbing. Don't think about it too hard."

"Yeah, you'll fry what little brain cells you have left," Amanda jokes. Mark goes to say something, but Lawrence cuts him off.

"Nice to meet you, Adam. I'm Lawrence Gordon. I'm forty-five, divorce, I have a daughter named Diana, I'm a doctor, and I like to read, build puzzles, and go on walks."

Adam holds his hand out for Lawrence to shake. Before turning expectantly towards Amanda. She looks dumbfounded for a minute before she understands.

"Oh, um, hi, I'm Amanda. Amanda Young. I'm thirty two and I like gardening, painting, and reading."

The group looks to Mark, who rolls his eyes, but obliges.

"Mark Hoffman, ex police officer, forty, hobbies include true crime shows and podcasts, reading, woodworking, making things from leather, and working out."

"You make things out leather?" Adam asks, genuinely interested.

"Yeah," Mark pulls out a shiny, new looking wallet. "Made this a couple of days ago. Take a look."

Adam takes the wallet and admires the craftsmanship. The smooth edges, the carefully stitched seams and pockets, and the name carved into the bottom right corner of one of the pockets.

"Hoffman? Do you know Angela?"

"Yeah, she's my sister."

"No way! She used to work here."

"Was she a good worker?" Mark asks.

"The best. She was my coordinator. She was in school while she was here wasn't she?"

"Ang was in nursing."

"Where is she now?"

"Doctor's office by the park."

"I'll have to go in there sometime. I'm looking for a doctor since mine retired."

"Adam to your register please," the cashier coordinator calls though the radio. Adam rolls his eyes and let's his shoulders slump. He groans before answering.

"On my way, Melinda. Sorry, guys. Duty call."

"Go on. They need you more than us," Lawrence encourages. Adam gives him a smile and runs up to the registers. The line is so long and more people just getting in it. Adam loses track of how long he's up there until a certain blonde man and is two friends approach his counter.

"Find everything you need?" Adam asks absent mindedly.

"Everything, except your number," Lawrence answers. Adam snaps back to reality and stares up at Lawrence.

"Three," Adam replies, smiling to himself.

"Actually, you're on register six," Amanda says. Adam chuckles and rolls his eyes.

"Fine, six. Six is my number."

"Come on, Adam, you know what I meant," Lawrence says, calling the attention back to him. The receipt prints and Adam scribbles something on the back of it before handing it to Lawrence.

"Enjoy your..." Adam trails off. He doesn't know what Lawrence bought, so he checks the bag. "New boxers?"

Lawrence chuckles and steps aside for his friends can make ther purchases as well. He taps away on his phone for a moment. Mark steps over to Lawrence.

"I think we're in the way. I know you wanna stare at him, but I think we should go wait for Amanda by the door."

"Amanda, Mark and I will be at the door. We're going to go get out of the way," Lawrence calls to her. She gives them a quick look and nods before going back to the story she's telling Adam. He laughs a genuine laugh. Something he hasn't done in a while. Melinda, his coordinator, sends Adam on his lunch after his transaction with Amanda.

"Where are you going?" Amanda asks as Adam steps around the counter to stand with her.

"It's break time, so I'm gonna use you as a human shield. I'm going outside to chill for my lunch break."

"How long is it?"

"Fortyfive minutes."

"Perfect. Let's go get food."

"I'm not hungry. Too anxious. There's too may people and I'm to overwhelmed to even think about food."

Amanda nods in understanding and starts to walk through the families standing at the registers. Most of them are parents and grandparents with small children, buying lots of toys and clothes and gift cards for Christmas presents. Adam has his hands on her shoulders, steering her through the crowd. They reach the other two men, who look confused by Adam's presence.

"I have lunch right now. Oh, shit, I have to go punch out. I'll be back," Adam explains and disappears into the mass of people milling about. Once in the breakroom, he pulls his phone out. He has a text from an unsaved number.

"You could enjoy my new boxers too."

Adam blushes, knowing the text is from Lawrence. He quickly makes his way to his locker and ducks his head inside, saving Lawrence's number and willing his cheeks to cool down.

A few minutes later he reappears, wearing a black jacket, and holding a backpack in his hands. "Okay, let's go."

Adam leads the trio behind the store to a little patch of woods that connects to a park. He goes to find the tree stump that he has been using as a stool and drops all his weight onto it.

"That kind of day, huh?" Mark asks, leaning against a tree. Adam nods, making some kind of muffled sound.

"You're not eating?" Lawrence asked.

"Too many people. Overwhelmed. Not hungry." Adam answers as he lays back onto the massive stump.

"I could hit them with Lawrence's cane for you," Amanda offers. Adam laughs but shakes his head.

"I'd get in trouble because Melinda thinks you're my friends, so I'd get in trouble because she hates me for some reason."

"Any idea why?" Mark asks.

"I don't know. She's super religious. Maybe she's homophobic as well."

"And she hates you because your gay?" Amanda asks.

"Actually, she says I don't exist because I'm bi."

"We can not exist together, then," Amanda says happily. She lays beside Adam and looks up through the trees to the sky. Lawrence joins them on Adam's right.

"Come on, Mark," Lawrence says, "it's kind of relaxing."

Mark huffs, but walks over and lays across the stump as well.

"So, we're not your friends?" Mark asks.

"No, you are, I guess. Melinda knows that. That's why I'd get in trouble for anything you guys did. She loved Angela though."

"If you ever want to quit, let us know. We got you," Amanda says. Adam chuckles.

"Okay."

They chat for a while until Adam checks his phone. He groans as be stands back up.

"Sorry, guys, I gotta go back."

"We'll walk you," Lawrence says, using his cane to push himself up. Adam smiles and starts walking back towards the store. Lawrence is on his right and keeps 'accidentally' bumping his hand into Adam's. Adam takes the hint and links his pinky with Lawrence's. The two smile at each other.

A few days later, Adam walks out of the store. The sun is almost down as he makes his way across the parking lot. He lives about an hour away by foot, but he doesn't mind the walk when he can't get Mads to give him a ride. He normally just listen to music and thinks, while being aware of his surroundings, of course.

He is almost at the gas station that marks the halfway point. He normally goes in for a snack and a drink, so he starts a path towards the doors. He hears a car pull in behind him, but doesn't pay attention as he pulls on the heavy door.

He's about to open the refrigerator door to grab a drink when a cane smacks the door, startling Adam from whatever thought he had. Adam jumps and spins around to find Lawrence smiling at him.

"I saw you out on the road. How far do you live?"

"A hour from the store on foot. Maybe fifteen-ish by car."

"How far from here?"

"Half an hour."

Just then, they hear a crack of thunder overhead. Adam looks past Lawrence, who looks over his shoulder, at the rain falling.

"Shit."

"We can take you home."

"Thank you."

"Not a problem at all, dear."

Adam's heart flutters at the term of endearment. He grabs his drink and turns to walk up front. He doesn't get a snack like he had planned. When he goes to pulls his wallet out, Lawrence pulls him back by his shoulder and hands the cashier money. Adam goes to protest, but Lawrence holds up the drink, turns, and walks out. Adam follows him out to the car, where Lawrence is holding open the door for him. He crawls into the backseat with Amanda.

"Hey, Adam. Long time no see."

"It's been too long," Adam jokes back. Amanda's door opens and Lawrence motions for her to get out. She doesn't get out, but crawls into the front seat, instead.

"Jesus Christ, Amanda, is this really necessary?" Mark asks. Lawrence replaces Amanda, sitting in the seat behind Mark, carefully moving his leg into the car.

"We're taking Adam home," Lawrence explains.

"And you guys will stay for dinner," Adam chimes in, pulling his phone and finding the app he uses to order pizza. Mark holds his phone out to Adam.

"Put in your address."

"Order whatever you want," Adam says, handing Mark his phone. A few minutes later, Mark has set on the course to Adam's apartment. According to the app, the pizza should be at his apartment in about twenty or so minutes after they arrive. "Mi casa es su casa."

The trio follow Adam into his apartment and take in the light gray walls, the brown, worn in couch, and the mess of dishes on the coffee table. There are multiple baskets and boxes of yarn scattered around the apartment. The dining table is covered in printed patterns, knitting needles, darning needles, stitch markers, tape measures, yarn, and unfinished projects. Adam walks through the apartment and dissappears into another room. He walks back in moments later in a pair of sweats and a Star Wars shirt. Lawrence is looking at the art on the wall by the doorway Adam disappeared into. He turns to the shorter man.

"You look better in that than your uniform," Lawrence says softly.

Adam's cheeks heat up and he mutters a quick thanks before he starts gathering the days old plates, cups, and cutlery. He walks into the kitchen and starts to wash a few of the dishes, so they will have something to eat on.

"You guys can watch whatever you want by the way. Remote should be on the table over there."

"You looked lonely," Lawrence's voice startles Adam back to reality. He had been lost in thought and decided to finish the dishes instead of waiting until later. His mind had started to wander to how he ended up with three people who were still strangers to him, but he knew that they were going to be good friends to him. And one of them could be even more.

"Oh, I'm good. Just thinking."

"About what?" Lawrence asks as he grabs a towel and starts drying everything. He sets them onto the counter since he doesn't know where anything goes.

"About how you guys are the first people to be nice to me in a while."

"What?"

"Yeah, I mean, I have Mads, but we don't really hangout outside of work unless she brings me home. Even then, we only talk about work. She's my work friend. That's about it. I don't have any friends outside of there. I'm always here. My family won't talk to me. I was always a disappointment to them. So, when I left for college, I vowed to never go back to them. I had to drop out, though. I was going to be evicted and needed money. I play videogames and read to pass the time. I go on walks and take pictures of nature or people to distract myself. To convince myself I'm not lonely. Especially around this time of year. I hate Christmas. I hate giving gifts because nothing I gave my parents was ever good enough for them. I stopped showing up to our family Christmas. I'd stay in my room reading the new book I'd bought for myself as a Christmas present. My family never noticed. And if they did they didn't care." Adam realizes his rambling and scrambles to fix the situation. "I mean, not to trauma dump, of course! You just asked what I was thinking about and that was it. I'm pathetic. I'm sorry. I'm rambling."

"What were you studying?"

"Huh?"

"In college. What was your major?"

"Computer sciences."

"Would you go back, given the chance?"

"In a heartbeat, but it's not feasible for me right now."

Lawrence nods. He reaches for Adam, who has moved across the small kitchen to put away dishes. Adam takes his hand and is pulled into a hug. Lawrence's arms are wrapped around Adam's shoulders. Adam's are wrapped around Lawrence's waist. His head tucked up under Lawrence's chin as Lawrence leans against the counter. For once in a very long time, Adam felt safe.

"You're not pathetic."

The day before Christmas was probably the busiest day of the entire year. The last minute shoppers were many, loud, and rude. Adam was happy he didn't have to close. In fact, his shift was over and he was trying to make his way through the crowd. Soon, he walked out the doors and into the fresh air. He spotted Mark's car and started walking towards it.

"Hey, Mark, thanks for the ride," he says while jumping into the front seat.

"No problem, Lawrence and Amanda have been arguing all day. I'm glad to be out of it."

Adam laughs and Mark pulled put of his parking space only for it to be immediately taken by another last minute shopper. The two chat on the way to the small house Lawrence and Amanda share. Mark parks at his house across the street and his partner walk out to greet them.

Adam had met Peter the day after he had his trio of friends to his house. Mark had went home and told Peter about Adam and Peter wanted to meet him. So, the next day, Mark showed up at Adam's apartment. Adam had the day off and was in the middle of watching Titanic. Well, technically he was at the end because he was full on sobbing, tears an snot trailing down his face.

"Are you okay?" Mark asked. Adam nodded, wiping his face with a tissue.

"I'm watching Titanic. What's up?"

"My boyfriend wants you to come have game night with us and Amanda. Lawrence has to work."

"Okay, let me finish the movie and get changed. There's like twenty minutes left. Come on in," Adam said and walked back to the couch. Mark ended up shedding secret tears he thought Adam didn't see. Adam told and it made game night even more fun.

Peter was kind and he and Adam boned immediately over their love of Star Wars.

"Hi, Peter," Adam says, grabbing one of the dishes of food from the man's arms.

"Hi, Adam. Thanks."

"How was work, babe?" Mark asks.

"I wanted to chew off my arm the whole time," Peter answers.

"Same here," Adam says.

"I'm gonna run inside for a minute. I'll meet you over there," Mark says before he kisses Peter on the cheek and walks to his house.

"No telling how long he'll be in there."

"Okay, let's go get out of this cold," Adam says. The two men walk across the street. Adam manages to ring the doorbell. The door swings open to reveal a flour covered Amanda. She smiles widely at the two men.

"Hi, Adam. Hello, Peter."

"Hi."

"Hey, Mandy," Peter says. The door is opened wider and the duo make their way inside and to the kitchen. Lawrence is taking a pie out of the oven.

"Hey, Larry."

"Hi, Petey," Lawrence says, turning around. He spots Adam and his already lit up face lights up even more. "Hi, Adam."

"Hi."

Lawrence hobbles his way around the island to engulf Adam in a hug. Adam gladly accepts this as it has become his favorite form of comfort. Adam is the one who breaks the contact.

"Where's your bathroom?" Adam asks. Lawrence takes his hand and starts limping around a corner. "Where's your cane?"

"Upstairs. I haven't thought about it until now."

"I can go get it for you."

"I can get it."

"Let me. I can see it's not entirely easy for you to walk right now. I can't imagine you going upstairs."

"Thank you."

A few minutes later, Adam is walking into Lawrence's room. He looks around the room. Everything is neatly places and looks near perfect. He spots the cane leaning against the nightstand. He goes to grab it and looks at the picture frames on the nightstand. He picks up the one in a gold frame. It's a girl with brown curly hair. She looks like Lawrence. This must be Diana. He sets it down and picks up the one in a black frame. The photo inside is of him and Lawrence. The first photo they took together. Amanda took it. They decided to go bowling one day after Adam got off work. The photo is of Adam holding two bowling balls up to his chest. He has a goofy smile on his face and Lawrence is behind him, leaning over to get a ball while looking at Adam. An amused look in his eyes and a lovestruck grin on his face.

Peter won, Amanda lost. She pouted most of the night after that.

Adam's heart flutters as he sets the frame back down and grabs the cane. When he returns downstairs, he catches Lawrence's eyes and gives him a knowing glance.

"Thank you, darling," Lawrence says as he takes his cane from Adam. Adam smiles at him and looks around to see everyone else distracted by setting the table. He quickly goes up on his toes and gives Lawrence's cheek and quick peck before going to help with the table. Minutes later they sit down to eat.

"Are you getting Diana tomorrow," Peter asks.

"I'm going to see her tomorrow morning. They're taking her to her Michael's family's tomorrow afternoon."

"What did you get everyone?" Amanda asks.

"An art set and a new laptop for Diana and tickets to a play Allison was talking about for Allison and Michael. Allison is also getting a book and Michael is getting a twelve in one tool thing. I think he'd like it."

"You're friends with your ex and her partner?" Adam asks. Lawrence nods.

"We didn't part on bad terms. I figured out who I was and she was supportive of that. We knew our marriage wasn't going to last, but also decided to part as friends. I was married to her for ten years, so, of course, it was hard. We get each other and Michael isn't a bad guy. I'm glad he's going to be Di's stepfather."

"Are they engaged?" Amanda asks excitedly. When Lawrence nods again Amanda squeals happily.

"Are you okay with us being friends?" Lawrence asks Adam.

"I think it's nice. You don't see it a lot and I think it's better for children to see their parents get along. Divorced, separated, not even married at all, married, but hates each other. It's good to see the positive side. I always saw the negative. I admire you."

"Well, thank you, Adam." Lawrence says. Adam smiles back.

After eating Adam helped Amanda put away food and clean up the dining room while Mark and Peter washed dishes. Lawrence was in the living room getting everything ready for a gift exchange.

Adam was nervous. He had put his gifts under the tree before cleaning the dining room. He was scared that none of them would like their presents. He made them himself, staying up night after night to get them all done. He had fun while doing it. Mainly because he caught up on his shows and YouTube videos.

Amanda opens hers first. A light pink sweater Adam had knitted.

"Adam! I love it! Thank you so much!" Amanda all but shouts.

Mark is next. His sweater is black.

"That's really soft. Thanks, Adam."

Peter is next with a gray sweater.

"Oh wow, this is amazingly detailed. You made this?"

"Yeah. I picked up knitting to reduce stress in college. College didn't last long, but knitting has."

Lawrence is the last to open his sweater. Light blue to match his eyes. Lawrence looks beside him to Adam.

"Thank you. I love y-it."

"You're welcome," Adam whispers. Was Lawrence about to say he loves Adam?

The gift exchange keeps going. Adam got twelve skeins of yarn from Amanda, really cool Star Wars prints and a handmade leather wallet from Mark and Peter, and Lawrence got him a big throw blanket and a book of photography.

"For your napping, reading, and photography."

"Thanks. I love it."

Hours later, after watching Christmas movies, eating cookies, and making fun of Mark for spilling his mug of hot chocolate all over himelf, Amanda has gone to bed and the couple went home. Adam and Lawrence are cuddled on the couch watching reruns of Friends.

"I think I need to get home," Adam says.

"You can stay here. It's already late."

"I don't want to overstay my welcome."

"You won't. Ever. You're always welcome here. For as long as you'd like."

"What about tomorrow? When you go see your daughter?"

"You can stay here and sleep. You know Amanda won't care. She'd be excited about it."

Adam hums and shifts to where his head is on Lawrence's shoulder and his legs are in his lap.

"Is this okay?"

"More than okay," Lawrence answers. His right hand goes to Adam's left thigh and rubs small circles with his thumb. His left arm pulls Adam closer. Adam angles his head up towards Lawrence's neck and he presses soft kisses onto the skin.

"If you don't stop doing that, I'm going to have to take you to bed with me."

"I thought l was going anyway. You'd never allow me to sleep on the couch."

"Yes I would."

"No you wouldn't, sir," Adam teases. He moves his head back to Lawrence's shoulder.

"I hate you."

"Nah."

"Yeah."

"No, I caught you when you opened my present. You were going to say you love me," Adam says lazily as he stares mindlessly at the TV. When he doesn't get a response from Lawrence he continues. "It's okay. I love you too."

Adam lifts himself to see Lawrence's face. It hold confusion and what appears to be joy. Adam lean close and whispers another quick 'I love you' before pressing his lips gently to Lawrence's for their first kiss. Lawrence pulls Adam impossibly closer.

Adam moves to straddle Lawrence's lap. They remain in their embrace, letting it slowly heat.

"Oh God," Lawrence groans. His hands moves to Adam's hips and shoves him onto the couch. He leans forward, elbows on knees, breathing hard. "You little minx."

"You love it."

"I do. Just so you know, everyone loves their presents."

"I know."

"I love mine and I promise to wear it as much as I can."

"You don't have to."

"I want to. Come here," Lawrence says, holding his arms open to Adam. The younger man let's Lawrence pull him close and snuggles into him.

"Does this mean I can finally take you on a date now?"

"Not until after tomorrow."

"I love you."

"I know."

"Don't you dare Han Solo me."

Adam chuckles. The clock strikes twelve and Adam looks up at Lawrence, who was already staring at him.

"Merry Christmas, babe."

"Merry Christmas, darling."

They share a kiss and go back to watching the show. Adam thinks about Christmases of his past and how disappointing and lonely they were.

He thinks about this Christmas and how he has been surrounded by his friends and his-

"Hey, Lawrence, are you my boyfriend now?"

"Yes."

His boyfriend. His heart swells with all the love he feels for Mark, Peter, Amanda, and Lawrence. He felt loved, appreciated, and seen this year. He was grateful for the gifts, but spending time with the ones he loved was more than he could ever ask for.

He might like Christmas after all.

#saw franchise #saw 2004 #adam stanheight #leigh whannell #mark hoffman #lawrence gordon #john kramer #amanda young #saw fanfic #tobin bell #peter strahm

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wolves-in-the-world · 11 months

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so i have been having a thought about this lately, feel free to ignore, if it doesn't fit for you:

anyway, same situation, but trans. (closeted or out (before this situation at least), one or both, any combination, i just think it could add an interesting twist)

i think my favourite version (least angst) is they're both already out, or at least eliot was previously already out but would prefer not to be quite THAT out about it, thank you very much, and quinn doesn't mind either way and is just enjoying the chaos of a good fight and good hitter solidarity (and also does eventually help eliot cover up once the improvised-weapon-instincts stop preventing this from happening)

OH MAN

oh man

okay I have made… so many runs at this in an attempt to either put my Serious Thoughts together in a way that wasn't horrific to read, or focus on the fun stuff only, and friend I'm not sure my brain is playing ball here

(the concept of trans man eliot unfortunately fills my brain with bees - he comes into canon so steeped in The Right Kind Of Masculinity and only softens a little, and reading that as a sort of trans defence mechanism, it's a bit too ouch for me to deal with - and hitters as people who already suffer challenges to their autonomy, imprisonment, Unspecified Horrors... it's just a lot if not handled very lightly and I think there's a reason I haven't played much with transmasc!quinn either.*)

(bees. the reason is bees.)

(ppl who saw my previous occasional trans dick jokes (obligatory why am I like this) may notice they were around all Safe Characters; i don't want to make ppl feel unsafe for the characters in a trans way, at least without warning that I'm delving into that stuff, and for me at least, that's a tricky line to walk.)

I do thank you for the thoughts - it's set cogs spinning in my brain, it's been a while, it's nice - and leave you with the stuff I jotted down before my brain fizzled out and returned to the whirlpool of horrors. it's a little off from what you said, but I hope it's fun anyway:

— so we have the sauna situation. let's assume eliot's there on a job. he's been making friends with some rich asshole and they're either in the sauna or they're headed that way - it depends on how sweaty you want him to be - and, trans or no, there's nothing much downstairs that sets him apart (there are a whole host of bottom surgery options now, not sure how common they were at the time) (I can't believe how dick-focused my past hour has been), and all hell breaks loose in the lobby.

— and, well, shit. what's he gonna do except take someone down with his towel?

— at which point quinn's run in from where he was discreetly standing guard, skidded to a stop when he saw eliot was handling himself fine, and ducked around a corner to see to his own clothes safely. eliot's half on the floor and choking someone out when he hears quinn's call of "here," automatically catches the shirt before it thwaps against his face and bolases around his neck, and has the next goon trussed up with it before he registers that a) that was a lifeline, thanks quinn and b) quinn is now FULLY in the buff and knocking out the security guard who was finally getting his shit together enough to call the cops.

— (I haven't done much with the image of transmasc quinn who started young and baby-faced, wearing ill-fitting suits to his first job, but that doesn't mean I don't love him. here as in your message, "quinn doesn't mind either way and is just enjoying the chaos of a good fight and good hitter solidarity.")

— cue a yelled conversation over the various unconscious and/or restrained bodies as they're tidying up, eliot gesturing frantically at the people gawking from the balcony as though quinn has ever felt even an ounce of shame, and quinn eventually standing there with his eyebrows raised while eliot - beet red - shoves quinn's own clothes at him in an attempt to give him his privacy back.

— I like to think that quinn's tying his tie and eliot's only gotten as far as buttoning his own jeans by the time the others turn up. nate hurries them all along before anyone can comment much, but you bet they're getting looks.

#this post is a mess apologies trivalent <3 <3 #I've been dithering about it but reblogs are off 'cos there's stuff here I don't know how to handle and I want to be cautious #conversation is fine but this is one I don't want to even slightly break containment #orig #what tags even apply. who knows. it's been too long.#*(okay so I Did in fact write a hitter-ish OC with a trans situation in my unshared longfic #but what I haven't mentioned is they were ripped straight from a fantasy setting #and at any given time hiding the fact that they can cave in someone's ribcage with a punch if they get desperate enough #so it's... different. there's a power fantasy and safety net offsetting any angst. and it helps that it wasn't written for anyone else.#like I do think there's a place for this in stories but I'm not sure how to talk about it publicly yeah.)

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atherix · 1 year

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Dear Midnight readers,

We are gathered hear today to mourn the loss of Atherix after she was brutally murdered by both gnawing and shaking at the hands of Stitch.

Atherix was a lovely writer in their time, produce for us two quality chapters in a matter of hours and she will be missed.

The burial service will be on thee plot B at Fuck You Cemetery at Midnight Tonight.

I AM GOING TO SHAKE YOU SO MUCH. YOU ARE LIKE A SNOW GLOBE AND I AM AN OVERENTHUASTIC CHILD IM. I DON'T HAVE COHERENT THOUGHTS BC I READ THE FIRST CHAPTER WHILE INCOHERENT AND THE SECOND CHAPTER RIGHT AS I WOKE UP THIS MORNING. HOW FUCKING DARE YOU, FIRST OF ALL???????

GOD the glyph disappearing. The faCT THAT I KNOW WHY YOU FUCKING BROUGHT IT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM TORMENTED WITH KNOWLEDGE.

The comb, the memory sharing, the vulnerability as Scar puts it I am in LOVE

ALSO THEY SAID THE TITLE. I don't care that midnight is super common in the story it makes me happy anyway.

And Grian not getting the whole shadows are light but not thing is so funny. oh my god.

'the magic the gods hold' SHAKES YOU. SHAKING YOU. SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE.

OH AND THEN THE DREAM AT THE END THERE??? EXCUSE ME!!! I mean. I knew it would come back up. But the fact that its there is making me INSANE

and then the fucking. the ALLEY. 'Its been a few years' HOW MANY IS A FEW, GRIAN. I NEED TO KNOW, GRIAN. ARE YOU FUCKING SURE SIR???????? Listen. Listen. I didn't even think that maybe grian was in stasis or some shit til everyone else was like 'is grian actually like centuries old and doesnt know' BECAUSE NOW. I AM THINKING ABOUT IT. I AM CONNECTING DOTS. I AM FUCKING GNAWING ON SHIT. THE FACT THAT HE SPEAKS ANCIENT. THE FACT THAT SCAR'S TOME HAS ADDED LINES THAT WERENT IN HIS BOOK. THE STATE OF THE ALLEY. The crack was narrows but now theres a giant hole in the ceiling. Other creatures have taken up residency in the alley. Grian's constant 'hes a little confused but hes got the spirit' vibes about everything. MY GEARS ARE FUCKING SPINNING.

God the fact that Grian just goes in. That grian keeps gettingb pulled out of his own head by his mates. The fact that Mumbo pulls Scar and tubbo down because its definitely not safe for them to just stay outside the mountain oh my god but then. Then.

Why DO the Watchers want the Tome hidden in a city full of Observants is my fucking question that I still haven't cracked. This is like one of those geodes full of water - thunderegg? I think they're called??? But I have theories okay. If the watchers are supposedly all seeing but the Palace had them wandering around AND they were walking around in a physical enough form for Grian to kill THREE of them right. Right. And theres the whole - the watchers Grian remembers werent following the stuff inside the tome right. WHAT IF. WHAT THE FUCK IF. [I feel like im talking to like. a twitch chat bc I know you arent gonna say shit about it] BUT OKAY THESE WATCHERS ARE LIKE. DEVIANT. THEYVE STRAYED. AND THEYVE MADE A BREAK OFF WITH THE ALLEY. AND THEY MAKE PEOPLE HIDE THEIR TOMES TO HIDE THEM FROM THE EYES OF THE OTHER WATCHERS, WHO SEE THAT THE ONES WHOVE TAKEN FORM ARENT FOLLOWING THE RULES. IDK. LISTEN. I READ THIS HALF DELIRIOUSLY.

Why do I recognize the Magical Menagerie. And WHY does Grian take his Tome if he already has Scars unless theirs some like godling part of his brain thats just like, dragon hoarding all the tomes. What is going on. What the fuck.

I dont fucking know if I believe that grian's only been gone for five years at this point. Relatively recent abandonment my ass, Scar. Tubbo and Mumbo have already called it, I'm believing your anons, Grian is OLD. WHERE ARE THE REMAINS. 5 YEARS IS NOT LONG ENOUGH FOR BODIES TO DECAY COMPLETELY AWATY. ABSOLUTELY NOT. THIS PLACE IS OLD AS BALLS.

And the way Grian just FLIES off when he hears Tilly's bark and the fact that I fucking TRUSTED YOU!!!! THE PALACE LOOKED LIVED IN AND THEN YOU TORMENT ME WITH THEIR DEAD LOVED ONES?? YOU MAKE MUMBO WATCH AS ONE OF HIS MATES AND HIS COVEN CHILD HIT THE APPARITIONS OF HIS DEAD WIFE AND DAUGHTER????? EXCUSE ME HOW FUCKING DARE YOU????????

the watchers eat pets im calling it now. This is a completely baseless accusation. they eat the pets.

'They prey on your emotions and then consume everything you are' HEY UH. HEY THERE TUBBO. TUB TUB. HEY BESTIE. ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY YOUR PARENTS ARE ACTIVELY BEING CONSUMED??????

AND THEN THE FALLING. AND THE FACT THAT THEY ARE ALL SO FUCKED UP. I AM SHAKING YOU. YOU ARE A CHEW TOY TO ME RN.

Oh man, looks like I need to get fitted for the casket real fast hjkfgdhskg-

OKAY BUT THAT ENTIRE INTRO TO THIS MADE ME CACKLE LIKE A HYENA COME ON-

... Am I at least a pretty snowglobe- KHFSJKFHSJKFKSJ OKAY BUT I CACKLED MYSELF TO SLEEP LAST NIGHT JUST IMAGINING YOU WAKING UP AND LOOKING AT YOUR PHONE AND SEEING MY "YOU'RE GONNA KILL ME" AND THE UPDATE NOTIF AND IT WAS TOTALLY WORTH IT <3

HEHEHEHE :) KNOWLEDGE YOU CAN NEVER SHARE WITH ANOTHER READER HEHEHEHE. Idk if it'll be catharsis when it comes up again but HFKSHFKJSK :)

He's trying to be better for them <3 Trying to be more open and honest and let them in more <3 And the memory sharing- it means so much more this time because last time he shared his memories with them they were asking questions, but this time he volunteered the info himself- invited them to see it, and I am so khfdshgkjdfshgkjfd I am so NORMAL about them <3

I LOVE A GOOD TITLE DROP <3 And hey. Midnight is very significant in the Midnight series :) Cough cough a midnight sun.... the Midnight Alley........ a midnight Eclipse.................. :)

Grian over here like "LIGHT IS LIGHT AND SHADOW IS SHADOW" lmaaoooo I love him, magic is a conundrum to him.

🙂 Hehe~

LOOK. LOOK IT WAS A PERFECT CHANCE. HOW COULD I RESIST :)

Hey. Hey Stitch. Looks like there are some surprises I haven't mentioned to you yet LMAO <3 I will neither confirm nor deny anything, and I shall explain nothing <3 I will say this, though.... for someone running away, Grian sure hasn't met anyone looking for him, has he. :)

Grian is just. So. Stubborn. If he didn't have Mumbo and Scar to reel him in this would have gone So Bad hjfdkjk but also the fact that he LETS them help him I am just so hjkfdskkfds

You are speaking to a chat, yes, because I can answer literally NONE of those :'D And these are questions I will not answer in private either <3 I need to leave SOME mysteries for you <3

You know, if the last page of the Tome is different, I wonder what else might be. Just. Just saying. :) As for why you recognize Magical Menagerie, it was mentioned in Midnight Melody, so <3

*cough*alsostalactiteswhereglassusedtobe*cough* Sorry sorry got something stuck in my throat, but :) It's an interesting idea isn't it, my dear Stitch and readers~

Haha the Palace IS lived in :) :) TRUST ME. IT'S OKAY TO TRUST ME HAHA <3 Okay but also Scar having that split moment of like "oh shit what do I do I know it's not his dead wife but it LOOKS like her" and just hjfdhsjkghdskj BUT I FUCKING DARE <3

HFSJUKHFKJS LMAO baseless accusation but you know what, they don't deserve the benefit of the doubt.

:) Hehehe

WHERE WILL THEY LAND I WONDER? HEY STITCH. STITCH DO YOU REMEMBER. I MENTIONED IT BEFORE. :) But. But hehehe <3

#Ask #Midnight Series #One of the fun parts about telling a friend some of your twists is that they have no clue the OTHERS are coming #so while they're waiting for That Twist you slam them with This One out of left field LMAO <3 #Long Post

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incarnateirony · 2 years

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i think 2po forgets that there's actually a fair amount of quiet, unknown fans that attend cons regularly and even m&gs *gasp* but we don't shout about it or leak stuff.... and we know that he's just trying to sound like he has info when really, he's just like any other fan digging in sandboxes and trying to make a jigsaw out of the scraps they find there. there's 20 people in these things, just because he's loud and has loud sources, and hangs around in loud circles, doesn't mean the other fans sitting in those chairs are statues. we listen, we take note, we go back to our quiet little lives and have to watch BNFs run their mouths like they've been chosen as a direct conduit between the gods (actors) and the insects (fans). but actually, they're no different than those of us who are having a nice time in our spn bubble while we point at him and go "...the fuck is he talking about?"

lots of love from a m&g attendee that is tired of seeing him talk shit when he wasn't in the fucking room. he's also the most blatant anti in disguise i've ever seen. p.s. the whole reason i follow you is because of a m&g. do you know who i don't follow for the same reason? 2po. hopefully this helps some people that still think 2po is legit "ITK."

Lemme guess, it's the one I busted him lying on. You don't have to confirm it, but yeah. We knew he had been lying and spinning M&Gs for years for the same reason you just said. Nobody could pin him down on it. 20 people in the room and yeah, a lot hear how he's lying and everyone's been trapped on pinning him down on it. Because the SECOND I pulled the truth out he went WE'RE REPORTING IT. Huh. So you admit it's real then. Too bad your friend was drunk with an open container violating the NDA in row A of the theater within 5 minutes. That sucks for you. Very loud ranting. And the threats for hellers daring to heller in a cockles M&G were just a nice touch of frosting on the shit cake.

And it's so funny bc if you look at his sources--he thought he was being slick when he blatantly described Gayle and Suzanne--they're still. just fans. It's fans sourcing fans sourcing fans, and those bloated fans think they're Someone and they're getting furiouser and furiouser and coming at me harder and harder. Like, no, it doesn't matter that you invested millions in Jared and Mantra, Suzanne, he isn't running the show. Probably why yall flipped shit. Their corner is drying up, Jared's M&Gs aren't even selling out anymore at bottom price, even selling J2 only adds like +100 to Jensen's value. They're realizing only a few people wanna work with him anymore, he doesn't hang out with people from the old lot anymore, and no, he wasn't included in the prequel organization, and their brains are fucking melting.

Also why they hate the origin of it. Because then. Well. Let's just say when Jared exploded I was like

our bad ig. Whatever. So like. Yeah. At least it's good to know other congoers are aware. I got a few reports today too of certain fans like "oh my god I met them you're right they're incredibly fucking obnoxious and think they're part of the cast", and really, that's what drives 2po's "ITK" shit. Fans feeding fans feeding fans feeding fans. Even Wiki is just a glorified fan, and the way she reeled back when 2po got her burned a few times tells me she's starting to realize that real quick.

And somehow this fandom had a stroke and forgot my warnings about coffeerunners like her that get elevated into first media roles not grokking their limitations and babbling to equally unqualified idiots, they forgot Manchin/Market Testing, they let that "fake script" shit get out of hand on purpose, and so on. What it boiled down to was she was salty I found a newer script than she was given access to, because she was hired in feb but given an old draft, which shows her content is screened, and I think she really did NOT like that reality.

It came from lack of understanding that like. Scripts are released the way they are to root out leakers just like her. Like TPTB knows now. She's never gonna get anything of worth now. She's just there as a rubber stamp hire to go LOOK OUR CANON WILL BE FINE WE HAVE THE WIKI when, realistically, as she isn't trained or studied for the job, her underqualification lets them get away with A LOT MORE SHIT so they get to giggle and flee and pat her on the head for a good job.

Like i said. the spnscripthunt server is a condensed form of the worst fans in all lanes. Antis, bitters, J2 tinhats, misha haters, manipulators, grifters, and active liars basically form the base, but they use the appeal of shiny scripts to radiate their garbage out through the people they manipulate into giving them free gold tickets.

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finagled · 1 year

Text

im so frustrated tonight. idk why. my brain is buzzing with an angry burning passion against the system but my body is tired from a long day.

i really wish i had the stomach for politics because like... people who meet me irl tend to like me. im good at educating them and persuading them without them getting the impression that im passing judgement. i have some Very Good Ideas that I think very few could argue with and would at least somewhat improve things, i think. i would not be ready yet but i could one day. there are things that could be said, spins that could be spun, that they are not doing. i wish i could

but i know i dont have the money or connections to keep myself and my family safe. that's probably my biggest hesitation in giving it more thought. i would not play the game. not only can you not win by not playing, but you also make yourself a gigantic target. i really think i could make a difference, but there's a reason why there's not more good politicians! they never make it that far

idk im just sorta rambling. ive been tired and im grieving from the anniversary of my dad's death and im stoned and just thinkin. for me none of this means anything unless im making a positive difference. i feel like ive got to do all i can to help because.... what else am i supposed to do? how can i, with a good conscience, put my heart into anything else when i know there's work to be done and i have this deep down feeling that ive got to help do it

if anyone has read this far, am i crazy for thinking like this? not a lot of people really follow my tumblr so i feel pretty okay posting about this without hate mail but like. it baffles me that we don't have somebody out there already saying some of this stuff. like for people who are so concerned about child grooming and shit, how come you're okay with the age of consent/marriage being below 18 in most of the country?? how is that not more of a talking point if child exploitation is such a worry? no its gotta be the trans

idk what im going to do to change things yet but ive always had this drive in me that im meant to keep going, keep trying until i find the answer. the people have power like never before, but we don't know how to use it yet. we make things go viral on accident. what good things can we make go viral on purpose? social media has been shown to encourage anti-social behaviors in us. how can we change things so they promote pro-social behavior? i mean??? am i just missing something huge here?

#radcurio #genuinely can somebody tell me if im crazy #i want to invest more in these ideas but i always get worried its a bipolar episode or something and im just getting like #crazy #???

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self-loathing-angel-of-thursday2 · 8 months

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Beautiful Spouse’s Rewatch Thoughts SPN 08x01 We Need to Talk about Kevin

“Do we really need to talk about Kevin?

🎶secret Kevin man🎶

“Asian Kevin” “that’s some x-files shit right there” “He has a girl in his tent. What’s up with that?” “what the fuck” “blood splatter everywhere still has good hair” “Does this go on the bullet list of how to be a good man? Always have good hair?” “and be well moisturized” “what the fuck is happening?” “what.the.fuck is going on here” “Yeah because that’ll heal easy” “Why is he dumping the blood all over the pelvis?” “Ok. Mr. Texas” “Kermit the 𓆏” “that’s sam Winchester” “who the fuck is that?” “I’m confused. Is she a demon?”

The demon storyline is over “PeePee, I’m not very good at this” “Winterfish? Whittling fish? You can whittle a fish on a stick or you can fish whittle sticks” “what the fuck” and laughter

Laughter

“What the fuck” “the ritual is baked in at this point” “oh shit. How long was he down there?” 🎶it’s a dick in a box🎶exploding dick in a box🎶

Laughter “that’s not funny” “Who is Sam talking about?” “You don’t know who Sasha Grey is?” “So they both just made a joke about a porn star? That’s why I laughed” “Little extra grizzled from purgatory?” i like the purgatory plot line

“Last season was ok, I guess. The ending felt anticlimactic” “Wow. He really sent this guy out for a piss” “6 months, eh?” “phone lines aren’t free. Did he pay for a phone he didn’t use for 6 months? Or did he just steal the phones?” “oh yeah just zoom and enhance” I don’t think there is a college in Centerville, MI

“Wasn’t she headed to like Yale or something?” “yeah fuck dogs” “hot take”

“I can relate” “I don’t trust most people’s dogs, though. Maybe I hate the owners more. Maybe it’s not the dogs’ faults” “colonial man” “that was very rubbery” “That’s not good” “Jesus fkn Christ” 🎶scowling at the world🎶

“He’s always thinking” “I can relate. It’s impossible to shut your brain off” “I feel like Sam should be more surprised to see Dean back. This is #2 back, right? He’s just mad now. Aw fuck, my brother died twice so I’m angry” “Just one of the many things I don’t like about sam” “Is this a bros before hoes moment?” “that whole room matches minus the carpet. The carpet does not match the drapes” “Be fair I haven’t seen any drapes yet” “What did Don ever do to Dean’s joints?” “lacing the drugs?” “I feel like he’s been there a year and hasn’t had one of these conversations already? And this guy is saying you can’t trust anyone?” “So Adderall puts you on a mission from god? IS that what I just heard?” “that’s a weird thing to say” “what the fuck” “looks like a ferrofluid” “which one are you staring at bud?” “the fuck?” Sam hit a dog and met a girl while Dean was making friends with vampires and fighting in purgatory

“I feel the same way” “That’s the face I’m going to give you next time I have a burger” “Didn’t he spin around the laptop already?” “oh he turned it back” “that doesn’t look like that good of a burger. Like a college campus burger” He hasn’t eaten much in the last year

“That’s true” “Why wouldn’t he be at a church? He’s a prophet of the lord” “He could have been dead for 6 months already” “It’s been 6 months since your last confession” laughter

“Is Kevin Tran a dark version of Ash Ketchum? Crowley’s the old man you see in every room, because the old man tells you what skill to remember, and you remember the skill” “It can’t be what - a couple paragraphs” “some shithole in Wisconsin” I mean there’s a lot of open space in Wisconsin. Farm land and stuff” “fkn goat” “because he’s the greatest demon of all time” “Man this show could have really gone a different direction” “Yup” 🎶fuck you sam🎶

“His hair is extra fucked this season, too” “This is the weirdest shit ever. All the candles are lit. We’re in some old ass church” “What the fuck did I just miss?” It was a bad joke

“Is that why I don’t understand it?” “This is not the lesson you want to teach kids” “Yup” “Could have just said that with your eyes” Did you get the blowjob joke? “No, I didn’t get it” “Sounds like locker room talk to me” “oh shit. Speaking of locker room talk” “they don’t have any leverage, to be fair” laughter

“That was rather emasculating” “Why find another one?” “oh. Well shit. Fuck you Crowley” “The head doesn’t like being hit” It’s a Marine phrase

“I guess John was a marine” What did you have to do down there, Dean? “Did this guy play another character in the show?” Yes, he was actually a vampire in an early season

#beautifulspouserewatchesspn #supernatural rewatch #supernatural #supernatural s8

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medicinemane · 11 months

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...maybe one of these days, maybe right before I die I'll just be fucking mean and cruel myself, and just go over all the shit people say that's just so damn fucking hurtful

Cause you have a lot of nice people who want to be kind going around being callous and cruel all the time, and it would hurt them to see the damage they do, but maybe I'd do that as a little petty bit of revenge and then go hang myself so there's no damn recourse or way to make things right

Probably won't, probably just take that shit to my grave but... there's shit that should be obvious, like it doesn't take a mental master to figure out it's rude and cruel to say. You've got your reasons, but reasons don't remove the cruelty

Then there's other stuff where it's like... everyone has this lore about shit that they've heard and therefore know it's true, but I was fucking there, I was in it, I watched it go down, and you've been fed shit but gladly gobble it up cause you want a punching bag

I mean fuck, some of you (who I know don't follow me, but we talk some times) were straight up there too, and yet I see you revising history just because some people have developed a bit of a mean steak over how shit went down

Lotta people full of a lot of shit.. that's all I'm saying. Lotta people just want acceptable punching bags, people who they are justified in mocking

I've been there for a lot of shit. I keep to myself, so I was never directly involved with a lot of it, but I watched, and you fuckers rewrite history about... in two different events where they way it's told is very different from what I saw, I can point to two suicide attempts... not sure which is sadder, the kid who ended up with brain damage, or the adult who did kill himself... nah... it's the kid, I actually can say, but it's a fucking tragedy in both cases, and in both cases people spin a very different tale from what was going on

All these sanctimonious saviors who truly know what's best for the world... well fuck me, I wouldn't want to be like you, even if it makes me the worst scum. Better scum like me than scum like you

Just fucking tired, and... I frankly don't trust people enough to talk about this shit. Maybe once I'm about to die I will, but... not till then. Never makes a damn bit of difference when I do actually say anything anyway

...notice I avoid saying generalize "you" statements, cause... it's not all of you or anything. It's just enough people where... I don't know

Don't like it... examine yourself and see if you do anything nasty and cruel, no matter why you do it, see if you do it. You don't... then don't agonize over it, you know? You really want to know the specifics... maybe I'll say, probably I won't, I don't know

But like me being as bad as I was the past few days, like I said, this shit just tanks my mood, and it's been so fucking long it's been going on for an people still won't drop it

Just... I'm not a pleasant person. I'm not a good person. I'm just fucking polite most of the time is all, and then other times I say long ass shit like this and... whatever

Have a good night and all that stuff, hopefully in the coming months I can arrange what to do with my body, and then fucking get on with it and leave everyone in peace already

#mm tag so i can find things later

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hustlemeanokay · 2 years

Text

Certain "truths" are not universal. It's important to understand this. For a variety of reasons. On a multitude of levels. When dealing with people, facts change concerning their experiences. What's true for one is not true for the other. Even if their lives have been exactly the same, their minds are not.

Just an example... at eighteen, in many many places - one is considered an "adult". But there are many who are not mature enough to hold that title. It's not a bad thing. It's just the reality of their situation. They're still learning how to be an adult and handle adult situations, carry adult responsibilities... all of that. While others? They've been an adult for quite a few years at that point. It all depends on the individual.

My daughter, who is eighteen and obviously still lives with us (which doesn't bother me at all and frankly, it confuses me when parents are bothered by that fact...) asked if she could get a kitten. Now... she already has a cat. Little psycho that it is... but that's beside the point. It's reasonable request... however... it's one that isn't thought out. We already have two cats (total). She rarely takes part in their upkeep, either of them. Again, not something I particularly care about as it's a chore that is divided out... it's kind of like "whoever sees the dish empty, fill it" type situation. But her request, again, is one that's not thought out. And... again, her age does come into play here but not in the way that "oh, she's 18, she's immature, blah blah" no. More in that... her mind doesn't automatically think something through entirely. Some people never get this. Others have had it from a very young age. With this kitten issue... maturity, adulthood... responsibility... thinking things through. Getting a pet isn't as simple as "oh, I think I'll get one" and calling it a day. There are expenses to consider. Vet bills... food... for a cat - it's litter, etc. Then it's how it will affect the home if there are already pets in it. All of that. And while she's bummed that the answer was and will remain "no", it occurred to me that many, like I've seen on here, would take this situation and spin it... call us horrible rotten parents who are somehow abusing her... or... putting her down or some bullshit. That's not an age thing, that's a maturity thing.

While there are parents out there who say 'no' just because it's easier. Those are few and far between, even if you don't think so. More often than not, they have a reason. Even if they answer 'no' rather quickly... it's because a mature mind can go through the scenarios, the outcomes, the processes, all the steps in all the directions very quickly. And come to the conclusion a lot quicker than a developing mind can. As soon as my daughter said "can I get a kitten?" My brain went "our older cat and her cat would both freak the fuck out... we're planning on possibly getting dogs in the next six months, she knows this... how are we going to afford the vet bills of all those animals, that shit-box already struggles with just two cats and another one would require another litter box, and more cleaning, and more litter and more food and she doesn't even do any of that as it is, and she wants another one - that's not a good idea". Within a minute, as in 60 seconds, "no" came out of my mouth. She doesn't have a job yet, she's still in school, she's already crazy busy with that. Having a kitten, a baby kitten, little thing... takes attention, takes time. Her room is always a mess, she cleans it - yeah but it has cords everywhere and paint brush jars with water and everything - not a room for a kitten to be in. Things I know she hasn't thought of.

Yes, there's a certain high one gets when excited about the prospect of a new pet. And it may seem like someone's trying to pop your happy balloon when they point this stuff out but this stuff is important. They're not doing it to be mean. And if more people thought of this stuff... there wouldn't be near as many pets in the shelters. Because they would have thought of how big that dog would get... or how much of a handful those kittens would be all at the same time, or how much it would cost to spay/neuter their pet... and what would happen if you didn't do that.

#family #pets #maturity #understanding #thinking things through #perception #there are few universal truths

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larytello · 2 years

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(( is the rest a 2% chance at finding it? ))

That depends...?

There's some good bunch of stuff about my old OCs posted somewhere in the depths of this Tumblr account and a few other sideblogs or actually other blogs I own (like Kouri Turtles and/or Neat Saviors, though this last one isn't much about OCs) I made a new sideblog to try and get back into RPing or just interacting through asks, but it's nowhere near ready yet. I haven't touched it in a couple ages by now. My friend Myrna is so gonna kill me at some point because of that lmao

I have a lot of things about my OCs that's just been in my mind and I never did anything about it.

And then there's the new Transformers OCs I have created during these last pandemic years, especially in the last 10 months or so, but the only thing one can find online so far is my fanfiction "Back To Life". I actually have planned like three fanfics + some side stories like spin offs and extra/bonus stuff, I have been coming up with ideas, lore, plots, developing the characters and stuff, I even drew some cool artworks and doodles and didn't publish them because they would be spoilers about the fanfics, BUUUUUT, ONLY ONE OC HAS MADE IT INTO THE STORY SO FAR. Others will come up soon, but the whole shit I have planned will flesh out only when I begin publishing the second fanfic.

Which I didn't start writing yet because I'm busy re-writing the first one as I publish it.

Which means everything I've been planning will take ages to come to light.

:')

I''d be happy to post more about all these little shits living rent free in my brain but I'm still trying to actually find my will to stay online. Most of my social media has been like a ghost town lately and I have no strength to keep creating content in a pace fast enough to be relevant in the eyes of the all-mighty algorithm which decides if you're worth exposition in the search tools or not. I feel no motivation to do anything about all this, it's annoying tbh.

Also thanks for the ask, I wasn't expecting anyone to be up now, it's past 3 AM here and it's one of those times when I really don't see anyone active/online... Wow

#It's like #I need to be active to have active followers #But then I have no strength or will to do so because my life is WELL it's complicated #I don't even have my own computer anymore AND I GREATLY MISS IT #It's so annoying to share one laptop between four people all day and night long #We legit take turns #Then I feel no will to draw as much because someone will need the laptop soon too #Then I also have no job and neither do my parents or brother #We all unemployed #And then I spend all my 'free time' drawing for commissions or watching animated series to keep my sanity #I want to go back to doing stuff that makes me happy and feel normal but something's holding me back and I just aaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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lucifer-is-a-bag-of-dicks · 3 years

Text

Not Enough

has anyone else just wanted Danny to go completely fucking feral at Dash? anyone?

yeah me too

this is some truly self-indulgent shit y'all

"Hey Fenton!"

Danny slammed his locker shut, sighing as Dash clapped him roughly on the shoulder.

"I'm throwin' a huge ass Halloween party this weekend, ghosts are all about Halloween right? You should totally come!"

It wasn't the first party Danny had been invited to since being outed as Phantom, but somehow Dash didn't seem to get the hint that he wasn't even remotely interested.

"No." Danny snapped, he threw his bag over his shoulder and turned his back on Dash, walking away without another word.

"What's your problem?"

Danny stopped, turning back around with a face of utter disdain.

"Excuse me?"

"I've been trying to be nice, but all you do is just brush me off! Like you can't even pretend to be busy or something?"

Danny stared, mouth halfway open as he tried to find the words to respond.

"Are you actually serious?" he finally choked out, almost too bewildered to be angry.

Almost.

"You're not still mad about all that stuff from before right?" Dash asked. "Like, I don't even do that shit anymore, it's over."

"Is it?" Danny's eyes flashed brightly and Dash took a half step back as the air went cold. "Because I'm pretty sure it was just yesterday that I pulled Mikey out of his locker."

"Well, yeah but that was Mikey." Dash laughed. "C'mon man, I wouldn't do that to you. We're totally cool now, so why you gotta keep blowing me off? You talk to Kwan like it's not big deal, and he used to wail on you all the time!"

Danny took a deep, slow breath, then another.

"Have you considered that maybe it's because I don't like you?" Danny said through gritted teeth.

Dash huffed, shoving his hands into his pockets and staring at the ground.

"Look, I get it, I was a jerk, but it's over! I'm actually trying to be nice, now you're the one being an asshole."

Danny looked as though he'd been slapped.

"You're such a fucking idiot Dash." Said Danny, his voice trembling with barely restrained rage. "You can't just treat someone like shit every single day for two years and then expect them to get over it because you invited them to a few parties."

"Then how come Kwan gets to hang out with you?" Dash could feel his face heating up. "You're just gonna let him off the hook? That's not fair!"

"HE APOLOGISED!"

In one thunderous moment, every locker in the hallway slammed open, sending papers and books flying across the floor. The few students still packing up their things got the fuck out of dodge, whether this was a ghost thing or a Fenton thing (was there even a difference at this point?) they wanted no part of it.

Dash couldn't move, his feet felt heavy, he wasn't entirely sure if Danny had done something to him with his ghost powers, or if he was just afraid.

Because he was certainly afraid.

Even after everyone found out, Danny still didn't use his powers at school unless it was a ghost emergency. He didn't use them for pranks, didn't use them to get even, didn't even use them to show off.

But he was sure as hell using them now, and Dash suddenly realised why he was always holding himself back.

He was terrifying.

Danny took a few steps forward, stopping barely an arm's length away from where Dash was rooted to the spot, trembling.

"Kwan apologised to me." He said, quietly this time. "He apologised to my friends, he even apologised to some other kids, and when I told him that I wasn't ready to forgive him, he accepted that and left me alone until I was ready to talk to him again."

Dash wanted to speak, but he couldn't seem to make his brain form the words he needed, it was too busy buzzing with danger run danger get out run run RUN.

"You made every single day of my life miserable for two whole fucking years, and that isn't even counting the bullshit you pulled in middle school. How do you feel right now Dash? Does it scare you to be around me? Does it scare you to be at the mercy of someone that you know damn well can hurt you?" Danny leant in, grabbing a fistful of letterman jacket. "I hope it does, because now maybe you'll have an idea what it was like for me going to school every fucking day knowing that you would be there, ready and waiting to hurt me. Every single FUCKING day."

Dash found himself being thrown backwards, his feet finally able to move again as he caught himself.

"I'm s-sor-sorry." he mumbled, his lips felt numb and tingly and his head swam with panic as he struggled to get the words out. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

"Are you?" Danny's voice cracked, his face wasn't twisted in rage anymore, his eyes were blue once again, and shining with tears. "Are you really sorry for hurting me? Or are you just sorry that the guy you were beating the shit out of turned out to be Phantom?"

"I didn't... I didn't know." Dash gasped out, he could barely hear his own words, all he could hear was his own heart beating loudly in his ears as he struggled to draw in breath. "I didn't know it was like that, I just thought-"

Thought what? What had he thought? That he wasn't really hurting anyone? That it wasn't that big a deal?

No, he hadn't thought that, because he hadn't thought at all.

"And you're gonna stand here and tell me I'm an asshole." Danny was almost sobbing as he raggedly spat out each word. "Because I won't forgive you for something you never even apologised for. This is the first time you even acknowledged that you were an absolute jerk to me, and you followed it up by demanding that I just get over it."

Dash stared down at the floor, it sounded terrible when Danny put it like that.

"I wasn't... demanding anything." he said, he was embarrassed by how whiny he sounded. "I was just trying to make it up to you, I was trying, I just thought... it's not fair that I can't have second chance. I was trying so hard and all I wanted was a second chance-"

"I DON'T CARE." Danny's eyes were screwed up tight, but it didn't stop the tears of fury from pouring down his cheeks, his voice so shredded with pain it was barely recognisable. "I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU. I DON'T CARE ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT. I DON'T OWE YOU A SECOND CHANCE. I DON'T OWE YOU ANYTHING. YOU FUCKED ME UP AND YOU. CAN'T. FIX IT."

Dash didn't know what to do. Danny was openly sobbing, his breaths came out in grunts as he couldn't hold the rage and misery back.

He was still standing within arm's reach, Dash cautiously put out a hand, to comfort him? He wasn't sure, but he barely brushed Danny's shoulder before Dash found himself spinning violently and his cheekbone exploded with sudden pain as he hit the floor. Cold hands drew away from him roughly.

"DON'T TOUCH ME." Danny screamed. "DON'T YOU EVER FUCKING TOUCH ME EVER AGAIN."

Dash watched as Danny grabbed his backpack and his footsteps disappeared down the hall.

It was over, just like that it was over.

Dash sat up and touched his face, he wasn't bleeding but he knew it would bruise pretty bad. It hurt, he would be squinting through one eye for a few days.

Danny could have done this to him at any time, he could have done it to him every day if he wanted, and maybe he would, now that he'd done it once.

The thought made Dash feel cold as dread pooled in his stomach.

The next day Dash told people he'd gotten his black eye from playing football, his team knew it wasn't true, but they didn't ask. He kept his eye out for Danny, wondering if he would pop up invisibly and knock him off his feet, or drag him through the floor, or hit him when nobody was looking.

He clung to Kwan's side all day, afraid to be alone.

Phantom could be anywhere, he could get him anywhere, if he wanted to hurt Dash nobody would be able to stop him.

Nobody had been able to stop Dash, and he didn't even have superpowers.

But in the end, nothing happened.

Dash went through the day untouched. Danny didn't even look his way. Not once. He just acted like yesterday never happened.

But it did happen, Dash still had the bruise on his cheek, and the terror set deep in his bones.

In the following days, weeks, months, Danny still never touched him, never looked at him, never talked to him. Dash realised that Danny probably wasn't going to do anything else after all, that maybe he hadn't even meant to hurt him in the first place.

He was a hero after all, he protected people, even people he didn't like. The only time he had ever come into contact with Dash again was to haul him out of the way of a ghost, and he did so with the same care as he would with anyone else.

Danny wasn't like him, he didn't gloat about hurting him, he didn't revel in the fact that Dash was scared of him. He just went about his day, acting for all the world like Dash didn't even exist.

Dash never gave him a true apology, it was clear Danny didn't want one, it was far too late for that.

It left Dash with a sick feeling of unfulfillment. He understood now what Danny had been going through, the pain, the terror, he wanted Danny to know that he was truly sorry, that he really had changed this time.

But he couldn't, because forcing an unwanted apology on him would just make Dash the asshole all over again, he was trying to steal a forgiveness that he could never have.

So he had to find his closure somewhere else.

He stopped picking on Mikey, and Nathan, and all of the other nerds he frequently hassled. He even tried apologising to them, some forgave him, others didn't, and he had to be okay with that. He struggled not to lash out, it still felt unfair, the world had always told him that you were supposed to forgive people when they apologised. It always happened that way on tv, in the cartoons he grew up watching. The mean kid would apologise, the other kids would forgive him, and they would all become friends.

He was realising that the real world was a whole lot more complicated than that, he didn't earn forgiveness just because apologising was hard, he was learning fast that he didn't earn any brownie points for taking responsibility for his actions. He was just doing what any decent person should.

It took him a while to come to terms with that, to stop being angry at people for not letting him make it up to them. For not letting him prove that he had changed.

All it took was to occasionally pass by Danny in the hallways for him to cool his jets and think more clearly. To remind him that he was the bad guy, he was the one who hurt people, that his victims did not owe him anything.

In his last year of school, he had found himself watching the juniors below him falling into the same behaviours, the same struggle for power and control. Pushing other kids around without so much as sparing a thought to how it made them feel.

After a lengthy chat with Mr Lancer, Dash was given permission to pull out younger students from detention one day a week. He would talk to them, ask about their lives, ask about their feelings. He would ask why they lashed out, why they thought it was okay to treat people that way. Most of them didn't have an answer, or simply refused to give one, but he would push, he wouldn't let them hide in ignorance like he did.

Some of them did feel guilt for the way they treated people, and they only needed someone they could talk to who could understand what they were going through, so they wouldn't take it out on whoever was around at the time.

Others would take more effort, they need a far stronger push in the right direction, they were defensive and combative, selfish and unapologetic.

Dash had been one of those kids, he knew they would be hard work, but he did his best. He couldn't help all of them, some were simply unwilling to change.

So he contacted the school-board, he pushed for better protection for students, more programs to help troubled kids, he volunteered to keep running his own counselling groups even after he graduated.

It still never felt like enough.

After graduation he turned down his favoured college to attend one closer to home so he could continue his volunteer work. He joined petitions and rallies for change across entire school districts, he spoke at other schools' anti-bullying campaigns. He'd attended enough of them in his own childhood that he knew they did next to nothing, but it gave him the opportunity to reach out to kids for one on one support.

He found more volunteers for his counselling groups, he helped people start them up in other local schools. It was a lot of work, especially when he was also juggling his college studies. He was taking a major in psychology, it was brutal, Dash had never been good at studying, but he'd decided that this was what he needed to do, this was important to him.

It still wasn't enough.

It would come at him in the night, as soon as he laid his head down on his pillow. He would see the faces of all the kids he hurt, it felt so much worse the older he got, they just looked younger and younger every time the memories came back to plague him.

He had beat the shit out of children. Kids who were the same age as the students he now counselled. He beat them until they were bloody or bruised, he shoved them into lockers, pulled pranks that humiliated them in front of the whole school, and he had laughed.

He'd laughed at their pain.

When the guilt weighed him down, he would begin searching for new programs to volunteer for, new petitions or rallies to get behind, always finding another way to help protect kids like Danny from kids like him.

And to protect kids like him from doing things that would one day haunt them.

He had spread himself thin across every school in the district, barely keeping afloat at college, but it wasn't enough.

It was never enough.

Kids still slipped through the cracks, schools were still too lenient, there were too many kids, not enough volunteers.

Casper High was holding another anti-bullying assembly. It had been a few years since Dash had attended one at his old school. This year they had excitedly announced that they'd even secured an appearance from Phantom himself.

Dash's blood ran cold, his hands shook as he went over his notes, he was slated to do his speech alongside Phantom's, they would be sharing the stage for a solid 75 minutes, barely a few feet from one another.

When Danny showed up he was already in Phantom form, Dash spotted him discussing emergency exit plans with one of the organisers in the event of a ghost attack.

He was so different from when they were in school.

He was tall, and broad, he stood with confidence and had a good natured charm to him. He was a hero, he was strong, he was brave. He could fight monsters ten times his size with a smirk and a witty one liner. He could take on anything, he wasn't afraid of anything.

He was a kid, running down a hallway, screaming words that still pierced through Dash's mind every time he saw the hero's face.

"DON'T TOUCH ME."

Dash's hands clenched around his notes, shaking so violently that they barely even looked like words.

"DON'T YOU EVER FUCKING TOUCH ME EVER AGAIN."

"Dash?"

A deep voice cut through the chaos in Dash's mind as cold hands closed over his tremblings ones.

"It's good to see you again."

Phantom was smiling at him, his hands still closed around Dash's.

"Good... good to see you too." Dash mumbled, not able to meet the man's eyes.

Phantom paused before releasing Dash's hands.

"I've heard all about your work." Phantom grinned as Dash finally looked up and met his eyes.

"Yeah." he said, and then before his mind could catch up with his mouth, he blurted out, "I'm sorry, for everything."

Phantom's eyebrows rose for a moment, before he gave a gentle smile and clapped a hand on Dash's shoulder.

"I know." he said warmly. "Thank you."

They gave their speeches, Dash had told his story many times before, the victim that he'd pushed to breaking point, the boy whose words drove the change that made him the man he had become.

For the first time ever, that boy was listening.

After the assembly had packed up and the volunteers were heading home, it was Danny Fenton who approached Dash and asked if he wanted to go grab a beer together.

Dash thought it would be rather awkward, but Danny had plenty of experience socialising with the public, awkwardness slid right off him, and soon enough Dash found himself laughing alongside Danny as he told a story about the new misadventures of the Box Ghost.

He returned to his dorm that night, head still swimming from one too many beers, and he had the best sleep of his life.

He pulled back on some of his volunteer work, hunting for new people to take his place as he focused on college. He was falling far behind, but he would work hard to make his way back. As a volunteer he could only do so much, but with the right education and training, he could do so much more.

The guilt still haunted him, every so often when the pressure and the stress weighed heavy, it would creep back into his mind. It would probably never go away, not entirely, but at least now he had his closure.

Finally, it was enough.

#lula's fanfics #I'm still in a creativity funk so this isn't like #my best work #but I needed to get it out of my system #danny phantom #dash baxter #danny phantom fanfiction #tw bullying

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uwusenpaiuwu · 3 years

Text

Baji A.K.A. The Worst (Best) Matchmaker Ever

Summary: Baji dares you to call Mikey a ‘piss boy.’ You’re an idiot, so of course you say you’ll do it. Things don’t go as planned...or do they?

Pairing: Sano Manjirou | Mikey x Male Reader

Warning(s): mentions of omorashi (pissing), but there’s no actual pissing involved

You’re gonna die. Oh, dear God, our holy Lord and savior, you’re gonna fucking die.

Baji may be an idiot, but you’re an even bigger idiot for letting him convince you to call Mikey a piss boy.

It’s a pretty damn good trade-off, you foolishly reasoned when you accepted his offer: $10 and a spin on his motorcycle, which is basically hitting the jackpot for a broke, motorcycle-less middle schooler like yourself.

Now, what you failed to take into consideration, is that you’d literally be risking your life. Had you taken a step back and used your brain for a second or two, you would’ve realized that calling Mikey, of all people, a ‘piss boy’ isn’t worth the measly $10 Baji is currently waving in the air from across the room.

You open your mouth to chicken out. Baji pulls out another $10.

“You wanna waste your allowance? Fuckin’ fine,” you grumble under your breath, making damn well sure your icy glare is received and, yeah, the irritating smirk that widens across Baji’s face when you continue on your path to your demise means your message is read, crystal clear. He just doesn’t give a shit.

Taking a deep breath, you square your shoulders and practically march towards where Mikey is casually munching on fresh taiyaki, legs crisscrossed as he sits atop an old crate.

Oh, man. What would’ve been worse: interrupting one of Mikey’s naps or interrupting him mid-snack?

(Un)Luckily, you get to experience one of them today!

When your footsteps lead you to where you don’t want to be, you stop to stand directly in front of your target, who doesn’t immediately look up in your presence. Simply keeps munch, munch, munching.

It gives you a chance to hesitate, a chance to rethink your reckless decision, a chance to back out and save yourself from a one-sided ass beating.

Alas, the chance to make that split-second decision vanishes when deep, dark eyes flicker up to meet yours, the owner’s expression reading that he’s not exactly bothered to see you there, rather, simply curious to know what you want.

It’s the perfect moment to get this bet over and done with, so, along with your prayers, you just go outright and say it.

“‘Sup, Piss Boy.”

Mikey stops chewing, and you already feel your heart about to burst out of your chest.

The room comes to a dead silence, making it all the more nerve-wracking when, following a dreadful minute of absolutely nothing, Toman’s leader speaks.

“What.”

It’s the only word he says, voice low, emotionless, and instead of it being a question, it’s a demand, a challenge even, to dare you to reaffirm what couldn’t have possibly come out of your mouth.

You remind yourself to breathe, while mentally preparing yourself to get decked in the face, ‘cause it’s way too late to backpedal now. One of your feet is already in the grave; it wouldn’t hurt to speed things up and launch your entire body in there.

“Nothing. I just- I wanted to know how my, uh...my little piss boy is...doing?”

Well, you lived a good life.

Mikey stares at you, unblinking.

One second passes. Two.

Then-

“Are you into that?”

“I- Huh?”

“Baji said you’re into some weird stuff, but that’s pretty fucking dirty, (Y/n). Even dirtier than Ken-chin’s tastes.”

(”Don’t fucking drag me into this shit.”)

Seeing the horrified confusion on your face, Mikey’s head tilts ever so slightly to the side.

“You want me to take a leak on you, right?” he asks, and that’s when your soul says its farewell, leaving behind a red-faced corpse on the verge of combusting. Bringing a hand to his chin, he adds, “Or, did you want to piss on me?”

You thought getting beat up by Mikey would be bad?

No, no, no.

You’d gladly take that over this humiliation.

“Hey, Baji! What did the couple in your porn mag do? Did they take turns or what?”

And Baji, the piece of shit, can’t hold it in anymore and breaks out in the most obnoxious laughter, the kind that’s loud, unrestrained, and has him doubling over, gasping for air.

“Oh, fuck, this is gold!” He’s wheezing at this point, triggering a few of the others to start laughing as well, including Mitsuya, who, to his credit, at least tries to stifle his laughter. “Ask (Y/n) what he prefers! Ask!”

At the other boy’s persistence, Mikey raises an eyebrow at you, giving you his full attention as though genuinely curious to know what your pissing preferences are. It causes the flush coloring your face to turn 10 shades darker and 10 degrees hotter.

You don’t know what’s worse: the fact that your friends now think you have a piss kink, or the fact that Mikey is open to exploring said kink with you.

“So, what’ll it be?”

“I...” What do you even say in this situation?

“Do you want me to pee on you?” Mikey asks again in a much softer voice, hoping it’ll reassure you into giving him a direct answer. He doesn’t want to scare you, no. Knowing how nervous you get around him, he’s been doing his best to show only the good sides of himself to you.

That must be why he takes your hand in his, giving it a little squeeze to encourage you to speak up. What he doesn’t know, is that as opposed to being comforted by the kind action, it makes you feel mortified, especially at the insinuation of you wanting him to release his bodily fluids on you.

So mortified, actually, that the first thing that comes out of your mouth is an unintentionally shy, “Please, don’t pee on me...”

You realize your mistake the second those words are said.

Ahh! No! That’s not what you were supposed to say!

Why didn’t you say you don’t want anything to do with piss in general?!

Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!

Your head is spinning, thoughts going haywire after misspeaking , but what really sends you over the edge is the, admittedly, cute little smile you catch on Mikey’s face. Now, not only is your head in disarray, so is your heart.

“Alright. Since it’s you, I’ll let you do it.”

Nope. That’s it for you. Time to clock out of consciousness.

Thump!

“Oh. He passed out.”

Abrupt as it is, your passing out is of no concern whatsoever to Mikey. Nah, he finds it endearing as hell and crouches down to admire your ‘sleeping’ face.

“He must’ve been super happy,” he fondly muses, completely ignoring Draken’s advice to make sure you’re still breathing in favor of stroking your head and pinching your cheeks.

(”He might die, dumbass. I’m tellin’ ya.”

“He won’t. (Y/n)’s strong.”)

On the other side of the room, Baji has zero fuel left in him to bark out another laugh at Mikey and his gullibility when it comes to wooing the person he fancies, though he does have the energy to wipe away the tears at the corners of his eyes.

“Best $20 I’ve ever spent,” he blissfully remarks to Chifuyu.

“Baji-san, this isn’t how you play matchmaker.”

“Dude, this is exactly how you play matchmaker.”

To prove his point, the long-haired teen points back to where Mikey is sitting beside you on the ground, carrying out a normal conversation with Draken, like there isn’t an unconscious person right beside them.

“Ken-chin, where should I take (Y/n) for our first date?”

“Huh? Date? I thought he was just gonna piss on you?”

“That means he likes me, Ken-chin,” Mikey explains, sounding, for all it’s worth, similar to a parent teaching their child a new life lesson. “And if the person I like likes me enough to want to piss on me, then, obviously, I should take him on a date.”

It makes no fucking sense, but if Mikey wants to believe that your love language is spilling less than desirable bodily fluids on each other, then so be it.

Because for him, anything goes as long as it’s you.

Not only are you $20 richer, you also scored yourself a date with someone that would let you take a piss on them and vice versa.

Aren’t you a lucky guy?

#tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers x male reader #mikey x reader #mikey x male reader #sano manjiro #sano manjirou #manjiro sano #manjirou sano #sano manjirou x male reader #sano manjiro x male reader #tokyo revengers x y/n #omorashi #but there's no actual pissing #i promise #it's only mentioned #piss kink

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