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noemitenshi · 5 months

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The moon bathes your face in gentle light

A Troy Otto post s8 Imagine/story of how Tracy and him started to heal after the events of that horrible season.

The idea came to me after a conversation with @marrecarandgi so many thanks for that! It wouldn't exist without you 🧡

Let's jump into it.

As per our agreement, Troy Otto definitely 100% survived the stabbing by Madison. I'm not gonna be thinking too much about how (taking a page out of canon's book - they never explained how he survived the hit to the head nor getting stabbed by Alicia either. Guess he's just *that good*). So, Troy survives, though I'm sure it's not pretty. By the skin of his teeth, in immense pain, and fearing for his daughter. Maybe not so much her survival because he gave his best didn't he. But what his lie will do to her. Now that this didn't kill him (again, again it didn't kill him). And every waking hour he imagines Tracy with Madison, imagines Madison turning Tracy against *him*. And he wishes it would be enough to know she survives but of course it's not. It's a father's pain he's bearing now (on top of the gaping gut wound, though he probably did something about that...), the loss of his daughter. Not the end of her life but the end of her love. And he has to be patient now, has to *heal* and it takes time, he knows it does (he's been through this before). He can't rush these things but god he wishes he could, he feels he's going crazy with this, waiting. Waiting never was his strong suite, he'd always preferred to act, however rashly. Preferred to *do* not think. And now thinking is the only thing that he *can* do. It takes weeks. Months, before he is halfway fit again (and probably a lot of sheer dumb luck, again, don't think too much about this). Anyway, the point is, he knows how to fight for things, how to go on despite, *how to survive* and he puts his all into it now. So he may get his daughter back (don't think about her, don't think about her, just get better). And once he is, better, he's putting everything into finding her. He *has to*. And of course he does. Probably sneaks into the camp at night and slits Madison's throat (like he should've done way back in s3...). If Alicia's there I don't think she survives this either. And then he takes his daughter and they leave. Off into the sunset they ride (or, I guess, sunrise. Since it was night). Now. Probably both of them will have some new trauma to deal with. Troy for, well, having been stabbed and losing his daughter (even for a bit) and losing his men and their kids and the safe place to call him he almost had in his hands... and Tracy for having lived with the killer of her dad - and thinking that her father had died. So, it's a lot for both of them. And I think both of them only start feeling these things when they have one another again (Tracy because she finally feels safe again and Troy because now his mind can finally stop thinking nonstop about getting Tracy back and uh starts processing all that other shit). So they aren't in the best place, emotionally speaking. Troy is bitter (though he really tries with Tracy. I do think he is still good with her, there's just now an edge in him that wasn't there before). And Tracy... Tracy probably has nightmares and panic/anxiety attacks - probably also bursts of anger at her dad. This is difficult on both of them... probably reminding Troy of his own childhood (the bursts of almost unexplained anger) and he's gonna have to work extra hard not to react like his parents (in high-stress situations it is very likely to fall back to well-known behaviorial patterns after all and what he knows *really well* is how his parents dealt with him when he behaved "badly"). So no wonder is he bitter/moody. On top of it all they still don't have a place to call home and maybe are just wandering around in search for... something. Not even sure he feels like he could built a new community since he lost his men - from the way they were it seemed like they were together for a while now. That has got to hurt. And maybe he feels safer, wandering around, not staying anywhere too long. (Maybe he is trying to run away, from these feelings - not that he can. he knows that. but the urge is still in him and so he gives into this, for a little. he's already stretched so very thin, he can't fight himself on this front now, too).

And one night when they've been scouting a bit too long, they stumble into another person's camp. or, well, it's not really a camp, not even a fire going, that's why they didn't avoid this spot, just a man curled on the ground, right by a tree. He woke, of course, when Troy stumbled over his feet. He didn't hesitate to give Tracy the signal to get out of sight, NOW, while he regained his footing, hand going to the pistol on his side while he eyed the stranger, who was slowly straightening into a sitting position, blinking slowly.

"you!"

They both spoke simultaneously and Troy's hand twitched with the need to draw his weapon when he saw who that man was. He *knew* him. And the second he'd recognized him, he felt like fate had slapped him. On both cheeks. That was...

"crazy dog"

That couldn't be true. But it was, he was here. What where all these ghosts from his past doing here?! When would he finally find peace from all of that!??!

"Troy Otto..." Crazy Dog replied. *He* didn't seem tense. Didn't seem alarmed. He looked - different, too, then back at the ranch. And Troy wasn't sure if it was just his missing anger or - something else? Haggard, he realized, Crazy Dog was haggard. Seemed tired too or was that because he'd leaned his head against the tree trunk and continued to look at Troy silently. Troy furrowed his brows. That was... not at all the reaction he had expected. It was so out of left field that he heard himself ask

"aren't you gonna draw your weapon?"

God, what was he doing?! Did he *want* a violent confrontation?

"No." Crazy Dog's answer was - not firm, not really. But it still had an air of finality to it. It had come faster than anything else he said (or did) before, too. Troy blinked. Mouthed 'no' uncomprehendingly. What was going on? The Crazy Dog he remembered had been dead set on killing him - had only waited for Troy to give him a reason, *any* reason. This, now, was the perfect opportunity to do so. But he seemed wholly uninterested in that. Not even bothered by Troy standing in front of him. Not *threatened*. Troy pulled his lips back into a snarl.

"I'm gonna be taking your things," he announced. Didn't even know why. Did he *want* to anger the other man?

"Don't have much anyway," Crazy Dog said mildly and - what was wrong with him!? Didn't he *care*?!

"Dad?"

Troy froze. Tracy apparently had figured there was no danger - no wonder, Crazy Dog hadn't even risen, still leaning almost relaxed against the tree trunk; both their voices were calm and Troy hadn't drawn his own weapon either.

"Dad?" Crazy Dog repeated and Troy swallowed uncomfrotably. *Afraid*. Would that tidbit finally compell the other man to be cruel? Was that what it would take to bring the Crazy Dog of old to the forefront? And without him even noticing he'd stepped in front of Tracy, blocking her from Crazy Dog's view, his face a stony mask.

"Take it."

Troy couldn't quite process what Crazy Dog had said to him, it didn't make sense. Not even a little. He must've looked confused, because Crazy Dog repeated, "My things" and nodded to the backpack, "Take them all." And it looked like - was that a slight smile tugging at Crazy Dog's lips? Was he having a stroke!? Or was Troy? Something wasn't right - but then again, why would he look a gift horse in the mouth? So he leaned down and took the backpack - somehow still expecting to be stabbed in the back. But no. Nothing like that was happening. *Nothing* was happening, actually. Just Crazy Dog looking at him, still with that almost smile. Even when he slung the backpack over his shoulder nothing changed.

"Thank you" that was Tracy, coming to stand right besides Troy, looking at Crazy Dog curiously. Her words were honest and Troy had the urge to pull her back behind himself again. Especially when Crazy Dog's gaze slid to her. That was it, wasn't it? He'd do what Troy had feared, attack them after all. Why did Tracy have to go and draw his attention like that---

But nothing like that happened. The only thing moving were the corners of Crazy Dog's mouth, deepening the slight smile a little - so it actually looked like a smile now. Somehow it made him appear even more tired. *Exhausted*. That's what it was. That was why he looked so different to how Troy remembered him. Not the years etched on his face, nor even the haggardness. It was the air of defeat around him. He *never once* had seemed defeated back then... He nodded at Tracy, kindly - again something that didn't fit with Troy's experience with that man. His daughter was smiling back and Troy stared. Seeing her smile, especially towards strangers, had become so seldom these days. So seldom after - Madison.

Tracy caught his gaze and raised her eyebrows demandingly. What was she--- oh.

"Thanks," he mumbled quickly, and watched his daughter smile at him now sweetly. He grinned back.

What he wouldn't do to have her smile like that.

Tracy looked suddenly around, searchingly. Troy enjoyed watching her when she got like this. Curious, inquisitive. About to solve some kind of puzzle in her mind. It was a delight, getting to see how her brain worked.

"Uhm...should we maybe stay here, dad? Until morning?"

Today was just full of unexpected things wasn't it? Never could he have predicted her saying exactly those words. 'No!' was his first impulse, he did not want to stay longer around Crazy Dog than he had to. Taking his things probably was already a mistake. Made them spend more time than necessary here... But then, this wasn't the kind of dad he was. Had made sure of it. Painstakingly. So, he asked,

"Why do you say that?"

"...it's not the safest spot..." she mumbled. Oh. She wanted to make sure Crazy Dog was ok. That was... Troy didn't know what that was.

"That's alright," Crazy Dog said before Troy could think of a reply, "I'll get home at first light. Don't you worry about me." His voice was still wrong. Different now though. Different now that he was talking to Tracy. Not as... devoid as before.

"We really should get going." Troy didn't waste time trying to hurry Tracy along. Especially since Crazy Dog seemed to be doing the same.

"Dad!" Tracy was tugging at his shirt "Dad, we can get him home right?" Then she turned to Crazy Dog "Our car isn't far from here, we-"

"Tracy." Troy's voice wasn't loud, nor especially harsh but she still stopped speaking. She knew it was his no-nonsense tone. The one that said she didn't have all information, didn't see all consequences of her actions. She didn't like when he used it and couldn't wait to ask him *what exactly* she hadn't thought through.

"Go along now, I'll be fine."

Troy was strangely thankful to the other man for insisting on this - and he didn't want to be.

"You heard him," he said, taking Tracy's hand in his and then they were walking.

"Be careful!" Tracy said as if it were an invocation, her serious eyes boring into Crazy Dog's.

"You too," he answered her immediately. But his gaze caught Troy's. Troy did not know what to make of this. This whole interaction feeling unreal. It had him on edge in a strange way and he couldn't wait to get as far away from this as possible.

Of course it wasn't that easy.

And so he found himself driving back to that spot, opening his door and hissing

"get in"

to crazy dog. Crazy Dog looked as perplexed as Troy himself felt over the whole thing - but then, Tracy always did have a way to get what she wanted. He didn't know why he'd thought it would be different this time. She'd been adamant about helping that person that had so selflessly given up his things. Troy had wanted to point out that he didn't seem to *care* one way or another, but really, that wouldn't accomplish anything but make her sad. or worried. he wasn't sure which one was worse. so he just bit his tongue. He *had* told her who he was - Crazy Dog. She knew that name from his tales. And - he'd thought it would make her back down. She had - hesitated (and that had hurt him unexpectedly, the sudden *curling into herself*. Of course, figures of his past would incite that reaction. After what the last group had done...!) But she hadn't backed down in the end, weighing Crazy Dog's behavior towards them *now* more than anything else that had happened in the past.

And so Troy agreed to do what she wanted because - he hadn't seen her as animated, as *invested* since - since! Her time away from him had done a number on her. On both of them, but he'd gladly shoulder whatever needed to, just so she could be spared. But that wasn't how it worked and so he had been helpless to watch her be this subdued, quiet child since he'd... recued her from Madison. Had watched her be so unlike herself. Had tried to bring her back, of course, anything and everything he could think of but---no need to keep thinking about that. His kid was back, at least for now.

And so he was now watching Crazy Dog hesitantly get into the back of the truck.

"Where am I going?" Troy asked him, and this was maybe the strangest thing to happen that night. Asking Crazy Dog for directions. But the way Tracy was beaming more than made up for him and when the other man didn't immediately answer Troy turned his head to him.

"Where to?" he asked again and somehow his voice had turned softer. Crazy Dog's gaze met Troy's. And after a little sigh he told him.

The drive was maybe half an hour at the most - and no one seemed to feel the desire to speak. Not even Tracy. Or maybe that was just Tracy retreating into herself again. Though she didn't look subdued, quite the opposite actually. Maybe she was just content. That thought made Troy smile a little. Maybe she really was. The road turned from asphalt to dirt and after a while Troy could see a farmhouse at the end of it.

"That it?" he asked. Crazy Dog nodded.

"You can just let me out he---"

"We said we'd get you home and we will," Troy interrupted. Honestly, they were almost there.

Crazy Dog nodded.

Then, slowly he said,

"You can.. come in if you want. Stay - the night. It's late." Almost reluctantly.

Troy still felt a sliver of irrational danger just imagining Crazy Dog near his daughter - but his daughter was looking at him with big big eyes and he thought a real bed would do her some good.

"It is," was all he said. Was as much as he allowed himself to agree.

"It's so nice here!" Tracy exclaimed once her large eyes had taken in as much as they could of the living area.

"Yeah," Crazy Dog said in that slow way of his, "it is..." Then he looked at her, brows furrowed. "I don't even know your name."

"Tracy," Tracy said. Crazy Dog repeated her name softly.

"I'm Lee," he said then.

"Not Crazy Dog?" Of course his daughter wouldn't let something like rest - and frankly, Troy wanted to know the answer to that, too.

"Just Lee," Crazy Dog - Lee? said mildly and without stopping asked, "Want something to eat? I've got food in the kitchen"- he nodded towards a door behind which Troy guessed was said kitchen-"though I'm not the best cook so... it's straight out of the can..."

"I can cook," Troy said and then let ...Lee show him around.

"It's not much," *Lee* said, almost apologetically. He was right, it wasn't the best stocked kitchen. But it was better than what Tracy and him had had the last few days. Weeks.

"I can work with this," Troy announced. *Lee* nodded at him.

"Take what you need. I'll leave you to it."

When Lee went back to the living room, he saw that Tracy had cozied up on the couch. It looked precious, in a way nothing had for... for a while now and the ghost of a smile was again tugging at his lips. He was strangely glad they had accepted his offer to stay. Or maybe not so strange, the house feeling more alive now than... for a while now. He sat down on the chair besides the couch and watched Tracy doze. How strange to think that Troy Otto had a child - a very sweet one at that. But then, years had passed. Years in which he'd assumed him dead. He... wasn't saddened to find he'd been wrong in that. Or maybe he was just glad to see how well Tracy had it with *him* as dad. Lee would not have guessed that Troy would turn into an indulgent dad. Would not have guessed he'd turn into a *good* dad, but from everything he'd seen today exactly this had happened.

"You *are* Crazy Dog though, aren't you?" Tracy was suddenly looking straight at him, sharp sharp eyes boring into his. Oh yes, she was her father's daughter.

"That's not a name I'm using anymore," Lee said.

"You know each other from ..back at the ranch," she continued without acknowledging what he'd said. Lee nodded.

"My dad told me you wanted him dead... why are you helping us now?"

Oh she was quite brave, this one. He'd have expected nothing less of Troy Otto's child. Whatever could be said about the man, a lack of bravery wasn't it. But where the bravery was almost scary in its intensity in Troy, it was endearing in Tracy.

"That was then. This is now."

Apparently this wasn't a good enough answer for her because she asked, sharply,

"You don't want him dead anymore?"

"I've got no reason to," Lee told her. He didn't. Who cared what had happened years ago. He'd moved on. he'd built a whole new life---

"He robbed you."

Oh, so she *had* heard that part, hm. Still he disagreed,

"I freely gave it to you"

"...why are you helping us?"

Lee closed his eyes, unwilling to think about this, to let his mind wander there...

"You have no reason to," she said, emphasizing the words almost mockingly. A challenge.

"...I do," Lee said softly. Oh, did he ever and his heart squeezed uncomfortably, his throat closed up and he tried to swallow against it.

"Food's done!" Troy had appeared in the kitchen doorway - just at the right time, it seemed. "Come." With one last look at Lee, Tracy went.

Lee breathed a sigh of relief, he hadn't been sure how much more of her questions he could take before... He shook his head and focused on his breathing. Slow and deliberate. In. Pause. Out. Pause. In. Pause. Out. Pause. And on and on until it was the only thing filling his mind. And then some more.

A sudden noise made him flinch and open his eyes. A plate of steaming food was placed in front of him.

"I meant you, too, you know?" Troy told him casually. Then he went back to the kitchen. Lee blinked at the food. It smelled - good. Much better than... He sighed. Then he slowly started eating. He figured they'd be more comfortable without him in the kitchen.

After they were done eating, Lee showed them the bathroom and the master bedroom. He knew how important it was to be able to stay together, especially during night, during sleep, the most vulnerable time. He took the couch - just like he'd done the days before. Somehow sleep came easier to him today.

The next day Troy woke early. Tracy was still sleeping and so he let her, softly moving out of the room and downstairs. He wasn't sure if he was surprised or not to see *Lee* awake too. He was just sitting there, looking outside into the rain. Still like a statue.

"What's wrong with you?" slipped from Troy - no one could accuse him of having tact. (And honestly, he was about fed up with this version of Crazy Dog. With being on this strange edge the whole time. He'd rather have it out, he thought). Lee turned to him, eyes suddenly as cold and dark as he remembered.

"I'm not talking about that."

Well. That wasn't helpful at all. Made him angry in a petulant way. But then, *he* didn't want to be to start a fight. Didn't want to destroy this for Tracy. They'd leave here soon enough and then who cared what had happened to Crazy Dog. So he turned his attention to the outside, where Lee was staring. A beautiful garden. Flowers and vegetable patches filling it.

He wondered about the canned food.

"Quite a garden," he remarked.

"...Yeah."

Troy rolled his eyes and decided to go snoop a little. Was bound to be more interesting than a conversation with *him*. That unsettling version of Crazy Dog. He didn't want to be too obvious about it, so he didn't exactly rummage around in closets (though he itched to), instead looking at what was displayed. The books laying around (a suspicious lot of them *medical* though he supposed it made sense to learn as much as one could about these things - doctors were hard to come by these days..), the wide array of knick-knacks. He couldn't see a common thread there. Shells and necklaces, lighters and key chains, little toys and pens. Strewn all over the house from what Troy could see. Curious.

"Dad?!"

Tracy was awake, and from the sounds of it trying not to panic.

"I'm here!" Troy was quick to reply, already going for the stairs, taking two, three at a time, rushing to her. He should've thought of that! God damn, he really should've but then - this hadn't really been an issue until now, him not being near her when she woke up. Of course it made her panic. The moment he stepped foot on the second floor Tracy rushed into his arms and he picked her up, having to shift as to not tumble down the stairs with the force with which she'd thrown herself at him.

"I'm here," he murmured, stroking over her hair, "It's alright."

She clung to him and it didn't seem like she wanted to let go anytime soon. He just shrugged good-naturedly and decided to carry her downstairs. Breakfast would do her good.

The way she hid her face in the crook of his neck, the way she held on to him had him remember their days when she was a toddler. When they'd lost--- He'd thought they'd never get through that. He'd thought, without *her* he wouldn't be able to do this. To be a good parent. He'd clung to her just as much as she'd clung to him during those days. And they both had persevered. They would again. Even if the situation seemed impossible. They'd done it once before. They would again. She'd be fine, with time. She'd get over this. He fastened his hold around her.

After breakfast - which had been a somewhat strange and subdued affair (strange because Lee had again declined to eat with them and subdued because the panic still clung to Tracy it seemed. Not as immediate but Troy could still tell) - Tracy had wandered to the bookshelves, looking through them. Somehow that had made Lee move from his place on the chair, looking to the outside and he'd started a quiet conversation with her - from what Troy could tell, asking her what she liked to read, offering different things. He watched the two of them for a while and when he saw that Tracy was becoming more animated the more they spoke he felt a tenseness fall from him he hadn't been aware of holding. *She would be ok*. Of course she would be.

Just now the sun was peaking through the clouds, the rain finally having stopped. He was immediately drawn to the garden, wanting to take a closer look at the vegetables - maybe there was something he could use?

"I'll be outside," he announced to the other two. Those had now moved to the couch, both their noses inside a thick medical book. He had to smile. Tracy definitely had her thirst for knowledge from him - and he was proud of her for that. For asking questions, trying to figure out how everything worked. It was a good thing to be thirsty for in this world, where nothing was safe. Where you could not depend on others--- He stopped these thoughts cold, stepping into the garden, his sharp eyes taking everything in. Most plants were already withered - no wonder, it was late autumn. But he did spy a small pumpkin and - weren't those sweet potatoes? He sat to work.

Somehow he didn't only harvest the few sweet potatoes and the two pumpkins but had started to cut back the plants that needed it and take out the ones that wouldn't survive the winter - he hadn't even thought about it, his hands intimately knowing what to do. And once he realized what he was doing - late into his work - he stopped, breathless, blinking around and looking at his work. Then he shook his head at himself and couldn't stop an self-deprecating smile. He hadn't even made it half through the garden. So he straightened and walked through the rest of it - it was in need of tending too. Not that it was overgrown, clearly there was work put into it. Just - not for the last... weeks? And when his gaze caught by something shimmering almost silver-y he thought he understood why. He'd found the missing puzzle piece he hadn't even been aware he'd been searching for. There in the secluded corner of the garden stood a pale wooden cross, a name carved into it - Ri Ortego. And underneath it just one word. 'Beloved'. Troy's fingers traced the letters and he couldn't help himself, but he felt like whoever had carved them (*Lee*, who else) must've been shaking. That explained his strange behavior. It was grief. He pulled his hand back as if burned.

"You had a wife." Troy hadn't even fully entered the house that those words left his mouth. Lee flinched. It wasn't enough for Troy, so he spoke her name. "Ri, right?"

Lee stood abruptly and stomped into the kitchen. Troy took that to mean he was right - why else would Lee be upset. And it was clear that he was.

"Da~ad!" Apparently he wasn't the only one to get that, Tracy was looking at him disapprovingly, her eyes glinting dangerously. He almost shrugged but then thought better of it. This was not the time to be flip with her. So he just blinked and pressed his lips together. He'd lost a wife too, after all. No need to be so dramatic over it. "You should apologize," he heard his daughter say. The same tone he used when he demanded the same of her. It almost made him smile. Though the prospect of doing *that* didn't let him. It wasn't like he'd *meant* to hurt the other man. He'd just been after answers. But Tracy kept staring at him - and both knew he'd give in, just as he'd had last night. He took every opportunity he had to make his daughter happy, after all. So he sighed and went to the kitchen, carefully opening the door.

"Hey," he whispered, somewhat uncomfortable, not wanting to startle the other man. Lee was sitting at the kitchen table, his back turned towards the door, hunched over. He looked like--- "Uh, that before," Troy started to explain, "listen, I, I didn't--- uhm..." There was no reaction and Troy swallowed. He had expected to get at least something from the other man. "I didn't mean anything by it." He finally settled on as an explanation. *That* had an effect; Lee turned his head slowly towards Troy and Troy was glad to be done speaking because otherwise the next word would've gotten stuck in his throat - the misery in Lee's eye, the devastation on his face felt like it was stopping his heart. It felt *so familiar*.

"I'm sorry." It was the easiest thing to say, suddenly. "*I'm sorry*, Lee."

***

And that is how it will begin. Of course Troy and Tracy will stay in Lee's house. Tracy is doing lots better there than before when they were driving around and though Troy does feel unbalanced by Lee's grief, he still feels alright staying. For Tracy, he's telling himself at first (and let's be honest, seeing the mirror of past him in Lee is difficult - maybe he didn't have enough space to grieve Serena what with having to raise a kid, so it's gonna be bringing things up for him too. But it'll be good for him overall) but he's gonna enjoy it, too. Being here with someone that is supposed to want him dead but very much *doesn't* is doing wonders for his trauma. And over time they're gonna become friends and raise Tracy together. Not sure how/when it'll turn romantic - maybe I'll add to this once I have an idea.

#troy otto #tracy otto #ftwd #fear the walking dead #fanfic #imagine #beginning of a story #crazy dog #fluff #bittersweet #more sweet than bitter #hopeful #healing #beginning of the rest of their lives #my fic

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queerleigh · 1 year

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Finally started to learn about saints and mystics starting w Julian of Norwich and???? omg???

I’ve been pondering and challenging theology related subjects since I was in grade school, only to be shut down and silenced by whatever church I was attending at the time. I was never given the opportunity to actually research and I was never given any guidance. But now that I’m 30 years old, now that I’m in a church that wants me to thrive and flourish, I’m finally being given delicious fucking food to satiate my spiritual hunger.

On one hand it feels great and somewhat validating. On the other hand I wish I could go back in time to my childself and tell her she’s not alone, she was never alone, she wasn’t crazy for thinking of such ‘strange’ theologies.

#i'm a little bit speechless tbh #its a bittersweet feeling to be sure #more sweet than bitter

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prettydjarinsoloinspires · 6 months

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before season 2 aired i thought we would never get our original Mobius back. I thought they were going to shove Sylki down our throats. i thought i was going to have to slough through a poorly written, unbearable season of tv just to get little crumbs of Loki and Mobius interacting.

but this. this far surpassed anything i could have hoped for. even if this story hadn’t been Loki’s i would have devoured it. it was clever and well thought out. it was well written with amazing sets and lighting and music. it played up strengths from season 1 that i thought for sure they had long abandoned. like the incredible and compelling setting that is the TVA. and making the cast an ensemble with the already stellar cast they had (and adding the instantly lovable O.B.). Tom was excellent. Owen was phenomenal. and every scene we got with them together was a gift.

the story was crafted with care and forethought and amazing attention to detail. you can’t say that about most big budget studio stories these days. i’m so in awe of everything this season was. it far surpassed season 1 for me and honored the legacy of Loki in a way i never could have dreamed. i honestly think it will go down as one of the most epic seasons of tv ever, for me.

it may have ended bittersweet, but it really didn’t feel like the end of Loki and Mobius’s story to me. it definitely feels like there’s more to tell. and i can’t wait.

#loki #lokius #mobius #tom hiddleston #owen wilson #i wish people could see just how GOOD this season was #it was bittersweet with more bitter than sweet but my GOD #it was a masterpiece #loki season 2 #mcu #loki spoilers #loki series #loki laufeyson #mobius m mobius #loki odinson #loki friggason #pretty rambles #anti sylki #antisylki

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engie-the-profit · 10 months

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worst popular infinite headcanon?

oh my. this one got long so im going to spare peoples dashes by putting this under a cut haha

anyways my answer is: making him out to be a little crybaby who is driven purely by revenge and sadness to make the world pay for shadow killing his squad mates, whom he loved in a normal way and saw them as family or whatever. it makes his character so goddamn flat and boring bc thats such a standard villain motivation, and it entirely strips away a lot of his personality even when theres already so little to work with LMAO

i know ive spoken about it at length in the dog&hog server but to me, infinites most notable trait is that hes selfish

in the prequel comic rise of infinite (yay, prequel comic talk. everyones favourite, i know) he deliberately ignores any protests from his gang against accepting eggmans deal of working with him, because eggy singles him out and offers him a place at his side to bring his fantasy of ruin into reality. not infinite and his crew, just infinite

(image has two comic panels. in the first one, eggman is reaching a hand out to infinite as he says "now you are an interesting guy. i like you. how about i hire you to lead my forces? together we'll take over the world!" in the second panel, one of the jackal squad members says "boss! dont be tempted by him. we'll be fine!")

and infinite says yes after briefly talking about how he personally feels bored and tired of how the world is right now

(image has two panels. in the first, infinite is mumbling to himself, first laughing and then saying "interesting. all this time ive been going through the motions. ive actually grown quite tired of the world as it is." in the second panel he stands and says "lets do it doctor! i'll help you change this world!")

again, its a decision based off an entirely personal and individualistic opinion that only takes his own feelings into account. you would think that if he valued his squad to the extent that they were "like family" to him, he would have listened when they said he shouldnt make a deal with eggman. if he actually cared about them as much as he cared about himself, he would have trusted them enough to say no. instead he only thinks about what he wants and what he can get, not about what will happen to the others

ive always been of the opinion that infinite used his squad and position of authority as their leader to prop himself up and viewed them more like underlings or subjects that he could order around and be superior to, rather than equals whose opinions and input he valued. maybe he started out having more camaraderie with the other jackals, but it certainly doesnt show by the time we get to the events of the prequel comic, and even less so when we get to episode shadow/the main game

the idea that he saw his squad more like tools to make himself look better than people also makes more sense because when in episode shadow, eggman calls infinites squad "useless" directly to him and all infinite says is "yeah, yeah" in a very uncaring fashion. even when he then spots shadow and says "you.. you destroyed my squad!" its entirely unconvincing to me that he said it out of sorrow or sadness; to me it was more like simple anger that it happened. because now without his little group of followers that looked up to him and did whatever he told them to, he had nobody to feel superior to. he couldnt go on any more power trips by being The Boss bc there was nobody left to indulge him, no one to stoke his ego, nobody to be the boss of. so thats why he felt slighted by shadow in the first place; how dare this hedgehog take away what made him feel special and important. and then of course the ensuing humiliation that came afterward was just the icing on the shit cake haha

it also explains why infinite never brings up his squad in any of his monologues (besides the prequel comics and episode shadow being obvious afterthoughts to the main game loool); he just doesnt care. if anything, their loss was his gain bc it pushed him towards acquiring the phantom ruby and getting to go on the ultimate power trip of world domination and near total subjugation of the population. i think that also ties into his mindset that friends make you weak and you cant rely on anyone but yourself; in his case, thats literally true. if he hadnt lost his squad, if he had initially listened to them, the chain of events we know well would not have come to pass and he would not have gotten to become the powerhouse he did. he would have still been leading his monotonous life and following the same old script. from his perspective they really did hold him back, and only once they were gone was he able to become stronger. he reiterates this by thanking shadow in the dlc for doing what he did in mystic jungle (killing the jackal squad and kicking infinites ass) bc otherwise he wouldnt have gotten the incentive he needed to take on the mantle of becoming a super powered weapon

and if you want some more evidence thats admittedly a lot more of a stretch, you could also interpret infinite creating a posse of past sonic foes as him filling the void of using the jackal squad that was created after shadow had taken them down. he gets to control people again (even if theyre clones that had no choice but to obey him but nyeh i told you it was a stretch), he gets to be a leader again

idk, i just think that having a sob story as a main motivation is (funny joke here) weak. i have never once thought that infinite needs to have some kind of sympathetic or tragic backstory. and maybe thats just my own personal bias coming through bc i prefer villains that are evil for reasons like their moral philosophies or have some kind of goal that makes the audience go "maybe they do have a point tbh" and villains that are just evil for the sake of it over villains that say "my mom died" as if that is any kind of justifiable explanation. imo it almost always comes off as them making an excuse, and its lame. just own it, yknow?

so yeah if i could block one thing from the minds of infinite fans it would be the hc that infinite was tightly knit with the jackals and wanted what was best for them. bc with all the evidence ive seen, its not supported at all, and hes actually the exact opposite; he does what he wants and uses who he wants for his own purposes and gain

also yes i do think shadow straight up killed the other jackals and i do think thats in character for him but thats a conversation for another day

#he said ask #bitter-sweet-coffee #engie.txt #infinite the jackal #sonic forces #sth #jackal squad #as with every opinion i have #remember that this is just that. an opinion #idc what anyone else does #if you want infinite to sob over losing his besties then fine #but dont act like its the most reasonable and backed up interpretation of canon #bc the evidence simply isnt there #im more than happy to enjoy canon all by myself #sitting alone in my i-love-respecting-canon corner

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dozydawn · 7 months

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“Come Back Lover, Come Back” by The Sylvers, 1981.

Vocalists: Foster Sylvers, Angie Sylvers, and Patricia Sylvers.

Reached #63 on the Billboard charts.

#it’s so incomplete... cause the bitter is more than the sweet!#disco #boogie #1981 #1980s #music #the sylvers #foster sylvers #angie sylvers #patricia sylvers #leon sylvers

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rykno-j · 9 months

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What it means to be the Strongest (j/jk)

Again writen with s/atos/ugu in mind, but unestablished, though definitely in love.

Summary: So my previous fic, if i remember correctly, had a line like:

["S/atoru, you've been too strong for too long. Let me take over, even if just for a little while."]

and then i realised i have something like that in my drafts, so why not i just develop the thought a little?

Notes: the timeline for this would be set before my previous fic [here] but reading it it isn't required to understand this one.

possibly written in the context of pre-RCT g/ojo? because i didn't want him to have the ability to replenish himself in any way. cue "Domain Amplification": Exhaustion.

there's also a point in the fic i used single inverted commas, like this: '[text]'. js to clarify, those are not actual dialogue but just g/eto's thoughts. uh.. it will make more sense when you reach that part..

And finally, to cope with the month of wait before Shibuya, I present to you..

3.4k words

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"Satoru, you've been specially requested."

"..Specially requested."

"..Specially resquested."

Geto watches as Gojo visibly deflates, before he shakes his head, expression changing as he stands up with that same bravo as ever.

"Right!! I'll prepare to leave immediately!"

The quiver in his legs don't go unnoticed by Geto.

This has been been happening for the past month. Don't they have other sorcerers that they can send?

The answer to that was obvious.

Of course there was. But who in the right mind would call on someone who was below 'the best option'?

Mission after mission, Geto finds himself missing the company of his friend. Normally, they would go on them together, but the recent spike in cases had left him with barely any space to breathe either, though he was relatively sure they were easier on him compared to Gojo.

He swears the other hadn't slept in weeks. Geto would return to their dorms, and the bed would still made the way he left it in the morning.

The few times he had tried to look under Gojo's sunglasses for eyebags, his hand had been swatted away, either physically or stopped with Infinity.

"Suguruu- I'm fine, don't worry about me."

"..Then look me in the eyes and say that again."

Gojo would laugh in response, waving his wrist dismissively in Geto's direction. "Of course I'm fine, we're the strongest, remember? It won't be fair I claimed to be tired now would it? Not that I am, of course."

Yes it would be, it would be fair. You need breaks too, Geto wanted to say, was going to say, if not for another interruption, this time from Gojo's phone.

It lit up in his lap, before the screen was raised to eye level. Geto watched as Gojo's eyebrows furrowed, shoulders slumping almost unnoticeably in disappointment.

He has seen this play out a thousand times before. As much as Geto wanted to reach out to drag Gojo back down next to him, his hand was frozen to his side.

"Another special request.. ahhh- I guess I better go get ready."

Geto watched silently as Gojo sauntered away, as if he was about to leave for a party, not a possibly life-threatening mission. Seriously.. he was forever taking things too lightly.

Geto wanted to do something, anything. Maybe file a request to give Satoru some space to breathe? Possibly even an argument that allowed him to join in the missions as backup?

Anything.

But there was always the possibility that Gojo would turn down rest, no matter how desperately he needed it. He was wearing himself dangerously thin, like a thread about to snap. All he needed was a little tug to break.

Break.

___

Days later:

"Satoru- want to go get a drink? I just saw the workers leaving, I think they got the machines refilled."

When met with no reply, Geto turned back, only to see Gojo spacing out a distance away.

"Sa-to-ru. Satoru- are you there?"

He walks up to the other, waving an open palm in front of the bowed head.

Behind the sunglasses, Geto sees Gojo's eyelashes flutter open before a finger came up to push them back into position, covering his eyes from view.

"Ah- yeah I'm here. Sorry, what were you saying?"

There he went again, dozing off at every chance he got. Geto noticed that had started happening two days ago. In class, during training, while queuing for food, while standing. And now, even while walking.

"..hH'!! ..hAH'sHHiew!! hh'..heH'tchH!!"

And there was that too. Something was definitely wrong.

"Satoru- when's the last time you slept?"

"I was just sleeping, hahaha-! Didn't you see?"

"That's not-"

"Suguru, if you're going to chew me out for not resting again, I assure you, I'm perfhH'.. perfectly.. fhH'.. fine-"

Geto shot him a look that screamed "Really??", and Gojo would have seen it, if not for the fact he snapped to the side violently, bending over as his breath hitched desperately.

"..hh'-hIH-tcHH'iew!! ..hAH'zZchHiw!!"

"Sa-"

"Dhh'..Don't worry abou'uhH'- hhH'!! hiH'zZchh!! ..hAH'DzZsh'w!! ..a-about me."

With the way he was swaying at the moment, Geto was sure a light breeze could knock him over.

What more, with the way he was standing, slouched over, a passerby would never be able to tell that Gojo was the taller of the two.

Hence, while Geto wouldn't consider himself to be one who actively sought after physical contact with Gojo (that's a lie though), he couldn't help but inch closer to the other, putting a comforting arm around Gojo's waist.

Geto then stared at the top of Gojo's head. Did his hair always look this messy? Surely not. Satoru wasn't one who paid too much attention to appearances, but this was taking it to an extreme.

"You look like you're going to collapse. Seriously. Tell me what's wrong."

"..Maybe- maybe.." Gojo mumbled as a response to Geto's earlier statement. "..Maybe I'm not feeling as well I thought.. haha-"

Geto sighs. "Took you damn near long enough. Come on, let's head back to our dorm. The drinks can wait."

Gojo whined something incomprehensible before he reached out a shaky hand to grab the arm supporting him from behind. He tilted his head up at an angle to shoot Geto a playful yet tired smirk. "Wait.. ahhh- Suguru.. s-sorry- I think.. I think I'm gonna to pass out right now."

Of course. Of course he could still find the energy to fool around in such circumstances. It was one of Gojo's character traits that Geto never understood.

He had half a mind to ask the other to snap out of it. But upon further inspection, Geto watched as Gojo's pupil glazed over with a hazy, faraway look, before it shrunk, eyelids sliding shut as Gojo went slack in his arms.

Seriously. Jokes like these should really be saved for less dire situations.

"..Satoru.. come on, let's go back."

No response.

"..Oi- Satoru.. you can't be serious. Quit fucking with me.."

No response. It's fine. Gojo liked messing with him after all.

"..S-Satoru.. oi Satoru!"

"..Fuck."

"..Fuck Fuck FUCK-! You can't be serious-"

He wasn't joking.

Forgetting that he could always manipulate his curses to handle Gojo's weight, Geto slipped his free hand under Gojo's knees, hauling him into his arms, bridal style.

"..Asshole! You're such an asshole."

'Your asshole though, right?' Geto could hear Gojo's teasing voice in his head as he made his way quickly through the hallway, his pace bordering a sprint.

That's right. My asshole.

Geto placed Gojo gently on the freshly made bed. It was probably the first time in weeks he had laid there. A soft groan escaped Gojo's lips as his head made contact with the soft pillow.

Good. He wasn't dead yet.

However, a quick touch to his cheek made Geto question his previous thought. With a fever like that, how was he not dead?

Quickly grabbing a small towel, Geto soaked it with water from his bottle, wringing it onto the floor before he brought it to the other's forehead. The mess of water puddles could wait. He had more important things to tend to.

Geto carefully folded and set Gojo's sunglasses aside, gently brushing away the strands of hair covering his face. The wet cloth was then put on his forehead.

It's not much, but it should help.

Knowing Gojo, he probably didn't take any medicine since this started. Speaking of which, Geto made a mental note to ask when it did. Gojo had been busy with a mission for the past few days, so it probably meant he was working through whatever this was.

Probably a cold.

The sneezing earlier should have been an obvious indication, but the fever he was currently running sealed the deal.

Geto knew exhaustion would eventually catch up to him. To be completely honest, he had thought Gojo would give in earlier. He must have been holding out way pass his limits.

It was alright to be weak at times, even for the 'Strongest', a concept that Gojo never seemed to understand. Either that or he did, but chose to ignore it in place of his ego and the fact that he didn't want anyone else to get hurt in his place if the curses turned out to the stronger than reported.

Geto suspected the reason leaned more towards the latter. Gojo had always cared about others in his own way, whether he considered them weak or not. Although.. with the way he openly made fun of people around him, it would cause others to beg otherwise.

Geto knew him better than that.

A soft whine drew him back into the present. Geto turned to focus his attention on Gojo. Even in the dimly lit room, his brilliant blue eyes were hard to miss, hard to look away from, no matter how dulled they were from the haze of the fever.

"Suguru.. Suguru-"

"Shh. Rest. I'm here."

"..You carried me here?"

"Mm."

Gojo let out a laugh that looked like it took all his effort. "You're stronger than you look then."

"You're just lighter than you look."

The small exchange put Geto slightly more at ease. If Satoru could still make any conversation into a joke, he was fine. Well, it at least meant his brain wasn't fried yet.

A sharp, feathery inhale dragged Geto's attention back to the bed.

"..hih'tchh!! hh'..hah'tchiw!!"

"Bless you." God. Even his sneezes sounded tired, a complete difference from his normal, over exaggerated ones.

"snff'- ..thanks."

Gojo looked seconds away from passing out again, his fist closing around the soft blanket. Sighing, Geto stood up.

"Alright, that's enough of being awake for you. Go back to sleep, okay? Let yourself rest for once."

"Hah.. so reluctant to talk to me?"

Quite the opposite, actually, Geto wanted to say. Instead, he reached over to straighten the cloth. It had fallen over to cover one of Gojo's eyes, making him look a lot more endearing than Geto would ever care to admit.

"Of course not. I just have something I have to get done, so I'll be leaving for a bit."

Geto turned away right as Gojo's frame sunk into the mattress in disappointment. If he had seen it, there was no way Geto would have left his side for another good year.

"Mm, okay."

Geto was careful not to open the door too wide. It was early in the evening, and he wanted to let in as little light as possible. Satoru had always been sensitive after all.

Behind the closed door, Gojo turned to the side, snatching Geto's pillow into his chest, pulling it into a tight embrace. He was sure the other wouldn't mind.

Getting pissed won't help anybody, Geto knew that, he really did. But with Gojo practically forced into bed-rest for at least half a week, he needed to raise some of his concerns to his teachers, at least.

He pulls the classroom door open.

"Sensei-"

"Ah, Suguru. Right on time. I've got a new mission file for you."

"Right. That's exactly what I've come to talk to you ab-"

"Satoru has been specially requested."

"..See that's-"

"But I've written in to specially request you to follow him."

"-exactly what I've been.. huh? What?"

The teacher gave him a knowing smile before sliding a file over the table. Of course. Always doing things in a roundabout way. He's seen that before.

"..Thank you."

He takes the file, quickly leaving the classroom afterwards, his legs taking him subconsciously back to where the dorms where as his hands occupied themselves with flipping through the documents.

Halfway through the mission file, Geto feels something slip out from between the pages. He leans forward to pick it up, a knowing smile flashing across his face.

A small packet of fever medicine.

Seems his teacher had the same idea, that Gojo would never go out of his way to get supplies, if at all, when he fell sick. Well, that saved him half the trouble.

And here came the other half.

When Geto returned to their dorm, he noticed the aura of Gojo's technique surrounding himself. It shocked him at first, but Geto figures that in his vulnerable state, Gojo's mind subconsciously casts infinity to keep him safe.

Though.. it could also have been a side effect from all the dangerous missions that they had put him through for the past month, such that his body was on heightened alert even during rest.

Well that's a first.

He hadn't really been around Gojo while he was sick before, especially not to the extent of passing out like that.

Surely this continuous usage of Infinity counted as over-exertion, evident from Gojo's slightly furrowed eyebrows despite him being asleep. His breathing was also choppier than usual, either due to the congestion or disturbed rest.

Surprisingly, Geto noticed that Infinity seemed to thin out as he approached the bed.

He remembers Gojo telling him, "Suguru- you know, I can totally tell apart your cursed energy from others!"

Was Satoru's body really recognising him and relaxing because of it? Guess that whole 'telling apart' thing wasn't a lie after all.

Geto reaches out a palm and presses it against Gojo's forehead. His hand easily passes through the barrier, making contact with the other. The damp cloth lay uselessly by the side of the pillow, having fulfilled its purpose.

Still warm, but cooler than before.

Gojo whines against the touch as he slowly stirs. "Suguruu- you're backk.."

"Mm." Geto hummed in reply, sitting himself by the edge of the bed. "Did you sleep well?"

"Ah.. not really."

The raw honesty catches Geto off-guard, especially compared to the previous few days, where Gojo would wave him off for being too worried, right up till the point he collapsed.

He supposes that upon admitting "I'm not feeling well", Gojo's walls simply crumbled, leaving him in Geto's care.

The mattress shifted as Gojo turned to the side, a wrist coming up to rub at his nose.

"S-Sorry.. I- hh' have t'hH-!! hih'tchh!! haH'zzchh!!"

He sniffles against his wrist, watching with teary eyes as Geto pulls out a small pack of travel tissues from the drawer before handing it to him.

"Th'hH-!! ..thank y-you.. hH'hihchH'iw!! hah'zzdchH!!"

He pulls out a piece, pressing it softly against his nose. Outside, the sun had barely start setting.

"..snff'.. Suguru- why are you here anyway? Don't you have better things to do?"

Better things to do than look after you? Unlikely. And your Infinity will just go up again once I leave. But of course Geto doesn't say that.

Instead, he raises the file in his hand. "Background information on a mission. I'll have to read it eventually anyway, I can do it here, I've got time."

"..A mission?"

"Yes. For the two of us, actually."

"Really?? I get to go with you this time?" Happiness seeped into his words, bringing an unconscious smile to Geto's face.

"Mm, but I doubt they'd let you go in this state."

Without even looking over, Geto swore he could hear the pout in Gojo's voice.

"Aw.. b-but I wna go with you."

"..Then get better. Quickly." Because I don't want to leave without you either. I'm never leaving you alone again if I can help it.

"Sigh- alright, alright.. I'll get some rest."

"Before that.." Geto suddenly remembered, rising to his feet to retrieve a mug. He should probably get Satoru to take the medicine as soon as possib-

Geto hears a crash behind him.

"SAtoru!"

On the floor, Gojo laughs softly at himself, hanging half off the bed.

"S-Sorry-"

"What were you doing?"

Gojo looked almost embarrassed. "Ah.. nothing, honestly.. I just.. I guess I just.. panicked when I saw you get up.. that's all. I thought you were going to leave again.."

Again? ..Oh, right. He had left for the classrooms earlier. Why didn't Satoru just say something before he did? Forget that. Why didn't he notice?

Geto quickly grabbed a mug, filling it with water before he returned to the bedside.

"I'm sorry."

"Hm? Ahh- it's okay, it's okay.. I was just saying silly things."

"No. Don't say that. It's okay to want company, to need company. That's why I'm here, right?"

"Mm, yeah."

"..Why do you sound so reluctant to admit it?"

Gojo shifted again, this time tilting his head away from Geto.

"..Suguru. Am I'm strong?"

"Mm, why the sudden question?"

"..Am I still considered strong if.. if something as simple as a cold can.. can.. hH'..hih'DzchH!! haH'tchHew!! ..snff'.. fuck. I can't even control those."

"I'd honestly be more surprised if you could." Geto replied, bringing the mug up to Gojo's lips. His voice sounded harsh, and the constant sneezes were not helping. "C'mon, look over here, you should drink something."

Gojo sighed, shifting the tissue away to drink from his mouth.

"Take these too."

"..Medicine? Where did you get those from?"

"Sensei."

"Ahh- damn. He really knows everything doesn't he?"

"Anyone on the outside could tell that you were wearing yourself thin, not just him. Shoko had her fair share of worries for you as well."

Gojo remained silent upon hearing that, seemingly very interested in the cup he was drinking from.

Geto felt his heart skip a beat. Had he said something wrong? Maybe he shouldn't have mentioned that fact it was obvious.

The silence lasted for a few moments, before Gojo inhaled sharply, turning to the side.

"..hH'-aH'zZchH!! hah-hH'tcHHiw!! hiH'dzZch'w!! hH'!!-..snff- hehh'tchhiw!"

Geto startled at the fit, though he quickly collected himself, eyes focusing on what appeared to be an extremely sorry Gojo.

In his hand was the empty mug, its contents having been spilled all over the blanket from the violent jerks, a side effect of the sneezing.

"..I'm s-orry.."

Geto paused in his actions of retrieving a cloth for the mess. Something was wrong. Satoru had a voice break? No matter how cute it was (god forbid he admit that), he had never heard the other say anything with such a broken tone before.

Forgetting the cloth, Geto quickly returned to Gojo's side, wrapping his arms around the shivering frame of Gojo's body, head resting above his.

Gojo froze in place, shocked at the sudden but welcomed contact. The mug in his hand slowly slipped off his fingers, falling onto the covers. A small whine escaped his lips yet again as Gojo's fingers repurposed themselves with grabbing gently at Geto's arm.

He found himself leaning into the warm embarce, turning his head slightly such that his cheek could rest against Geto's chest.

Gojo had longed for this for days. Days. Days. He could feel tears starting to form at the corner of his eyes. From the cold or from his overflowing emotions? He had no idea.

"Suguru. Come lie down with me, please?"

He didn't need to be asked twice.

Within seconds, Geto had climbed onto the bed, getting comfortable under the covers as he extended a hand to Gojo.

"Come. Leave that side. It's wet." An excuse to get Gojo into his arms.

Gojo crawled over to where Geto was waiting, instantly latching onto the other the moment he got close enough to do so.

As Geto's arms close around him once again, Gojo realised that he had never felt so.. so safe, so.. comforted, before. It was a new feeling, one he was afraid of yet welcomed.

He had only known Suguru for a year, but damn was the guy making him question his own feelings left right and center.

A hand found itself on the back of Gojo's head as he snuggled closer into Geto's chest, burying his nose into the folds of Geto's shirt.

Drowsiness slowly started to take over as Gojo felt like this was the first time in forever he was truly allowed to relax. Was it from the medicine? Or was it from Geto's steady heartbeat that was lulling him to sleep? In all honesty, it didn't matter.

Geto felt Gojo relax in his embrace. Once the stuffy soft snores started to slip into a rhythm, he tilted his head downwards, whispering in a low, soothing voice.

"Satoru, you've been too strong for too long. Let me take over, even if just for a little while."

That was the last thing said for the night, as Geto himself started to drift off into sleep, the sun setting behind him

Unknown to the other, Gojo's lips curled into a smile.

Really.. the things Suguru says when he thinks no one is listening. It was going to be the death of him one day.

-end-

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Finishing notes:

this fic actually stemmed from the phrase "what if Gojo's Infinity came up by itself when he's sick?" then it.. became.. this.. somehow..

decided to change their roles here ahhh- caretaker Getoo-

maybe i wrote Gojo a little out of character with the amount of clinging he did to Geto (also the whole DON'T LEAVE ME panic of a sick person in bed), but hey. i'm a strong advocate for clingy sick Gojo, sue me.

i also wanted to keep up the soft Gojo writing, soo i tried the whole "strong character falls weak to a cold" trope thing

BUT i also know for a FACT that i was NOT going to be satisfied if i just let Gojo go out like that, so i tried making his collapse scene exclusively *him*

by that i mean i tried making it slightly humorous. ahh well if it ended up not coming out like that.. it's still fine

also wanted to write a whole "Gojo pretending he's alright when he's not" fic, and was trying to capture the whole "once he admits he's not okay, everything comes crumbling down and he's a mess" thing

i feel like a lot more could have been written in this fic.. but the problem was i didn't know how to.. shshhdhshds im getting better i swear (abit more of this in the tags)

i hope the final scene read as soft as i was hoping it would. just picture Gojo sinking into Geto's hug, smooshing his face against Geto's chest, whining a whole bunch, breathing in his scent

..or maybe scratch the scent part, since Gojo's nose is a little congested//

anyway, hope it was a nice read and thankyou for stopping by!!

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#j/jk #g/ojo s/atoru #g/eto s/uguru #s/atos/ugu #mywritting #again its more caretaking than snz but ig thats normally how my fics go #soft g/ojo does crazy things to me so once again this was super enjoyable to write 100% would do it again #though i admit i struggled ALOT with much of the dialogue in order to keep it in character #THE BRIDAL CARRY PART OMG I WAS SMILING MYSELF SILLY WHEN I WROTE IT #just imagining g/eto running through the school hallways with his husband in arms #screaming MAKE WAY MAKE WAY #about what i could have added to the spilling the water all over the bed scene:#i had initially planned to make g/eto refill the cup with something sweet like applejuice for g/ojo #but ended up scrapping that entirely and making him just go in for the hug #about the eating the medicine scene:#i had initially planned a whole scene where g/ojo was being shy about not being able to swallow pills whole #a shy “i.. normally take the liquid ones..”#cue g/eto getting applejuice to help him take a crushed pill (lessen the bitterness)#sjsjjsdsh don't ask me what kinda title is that I WAS STRUGGLING SO MUCH TO THINK OF SMTH THAT FITS #titling is the hardest part of fic writing istg.#mythoughts

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