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#maybe i feel a bit anxious in general like i have to do more. sm more. i'm not sure. i'm sorry. i dont want to think too much rn

xxoxobree · 22 days

Note

((just the jjk adults please if you dont mind!!)maybe excluding geto t_t unless you really think we'd fit!!♡ m so sorry if this is too long i HAVENT done this before but im so excited to heheeh

♡personality- ill do my best here uahh if it matters I'm an INFP 9W1! (and a scorpio if that helps!!) i can be rather shy, anxious, and quiet but with people I love/m comfortable with Im much more open and lively (love my friends sm<3_<3) id say im generally empathetic, compassionate and caring with them to the best of my abilities ♡ i can also be a bit insecure, dependent, and in need of reassurance at times ,, but for the most part im rather content :D

♡appearance- ill keep this short D: im decently pale with sorta naturally pink cheeks (very prone to dry skin t_t) i have decently long dark brown hair which is curly/wavy which i usually don't style all that much at all anyways,, uhh otherwise I'm 5'4 with hazel eyes and chubby

♡likes- m about to yap i apologize. i love animals (pretty much all of them but bugs do often scare me BUT IM LEARNING TO LOVE EM I PROMISE), I love to cosplay and go to conventions with friends, I collect plushies and I have way too many,, d&d, video games (esp with friends,, league, dbd,, stardew,,pokemon), drawing!!, reading (fanfics...), being with my friends/family, listening to my friends talk about their interests!! and learning about their cultures, random but I really like godzilla and mothra (kaijus/dragons in general,,), anime (jjk, csm, op,samurai champloo)) and manga!!, random videogame documentaries (especially silent hill,,) a lot more but,, I hope this is enough!!

♡dislikes- MUSHROOMS!!! , sudden loud noises, gege...., generally mean people??, , and I cant really think of anything rn M SORRU!!

♡hobbies- okay a olt of these are listed in my likes oopsies, i enjoy drawing, cosplaying, collecting (figures/stuffed animals), reading, playing video games, and creating outfits/costumes! (probably more I'm forgorring,,

♡music taste- 95% alex g rn,,,esp the trick dsu beach music and gsta albums,.. but if it helps i also like lil peep, nirvana, jared emerson-johnson, akira yamaoka, bob dylan, and like,, weird al hjbeheb ♡notes- THANK u so soso much for the opportunity ♡♡it means the absolute world please have a great day/night <33 much love mwah!!

Heyyy thanks for sending 🥰🥰 (you’re so real for excluding Geto 🤣 and hating gege cause he has to put the pen down)

ChosoChosoChoso

You’d be perfect

Like you he loves and cares about the people close to him, would die for them. Would understand you so well when you express your feelings about family and friends.

Being dependent is literally not a problem for him at all he want you to depend on him and come to him for everything. I do not think you’d ever be insecure with this man. Compliments you 24/7. If you are insecure reassures you immediately, probably sad that you feel that way.

Loves that you spend time with family, will definitely want to be around your family.

Secretly plays with your stuffies. (I’m curious about them too 🤭 I want a Nanami plush sooo bad.)

Content with sitting and watching you play video games, refuses to play them himself though.

Doesn’t get asked much about himself so he would be shocked that you want to hear about him.

Watches all the Godzilla movies with you , thinks it’s the best thing ever

#xxoxo updates

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nian-7 · 1 month

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Heyo, I think matchup reqs are open but if not feel free to ignore (⁠・⁠–⁠・⁠;⁠)⁠ゞ

If it's alright I'd like a romantic and platonic match up for Pjsk and bsd (if not just romantic/ pjsk is fine)

Info:

My names Karma

I'm a minor, 17

I'm afab but I'm Genderfluid and use all pronouns

I'm pretty short for my age, 5’1 the last time I checked unfortunately, sobs. I don't get out much besides going to work for money so I'm pale as hell. I have freckles pretty much everywhere not a whole lot but they're definitely noticeable. I am cursed with a baby face, it gets better when I put on my glasses though, im cursed with terrible vision, I'm not allowed to drive without my glasses it's that bad

My hair is a shaggy wolf cut with curtain bangs, I'm a natural blonde but I always dye my hair ginger cause it's my favorite look on me (I'm trying to look like Chuuya cause I love him sm)

I'm an INFP-T, I'm also Asexual and Panromantic (slightly woman leaning but not an insane amount) I dress in dark academia style almost always: cardigans, sweater vests, long over coats paired with sweaters underneath. I'm very much trying to be that person you fall in love with in the book store

When I'm in public alone I am very much socially awkward and anxious. I keep to myself and I am terrified of causing trouble for anyone

I tend to be drawn to more loud people; or more like popular/louder people adopt me out of the blue and I go along with it (which is funny considering I'm usually quiet)

Once I've warmed up with people I very much match energys with whoever I'm with, typically just trying to make friends laugh. I value people's happiness very much

If we're out at a mall or something I'm quieter, but in private I can get very loud

I also have a very close group of online friends all over the world (Some of us are meeting up soon and I'm very excited)

A lot of people have said that I also have big sister vibes

I do have diagnosed Anxiety and depression, typically I try not to let anyone see that side of me. I can spiral a bit into episodes where I just kind of ghost people and ride out whatever feelings I'm dealing with, then come back about 3-6 days later

I don't really do well with anger in general, weather it be my own or other people's

I also don't really have any appetite most of the time (I'm not sure if it's medical or not) but this can cause me sometimes to get super dizzy out of nowhere because I've forgotten to eat/drink

I'm a digital artist, and I actually write fanfiction on Tumblr as well. I absolutely love cats, I’d talk about my cat Hazel for hours if I could (She's mean to me but I still love her </3) I also really like Vocaloid/Hatsune Miku music (kinda not surprising considering pjsk lol), I don't usually mention it in person though cause it's embarrassing to explain that shes just a singing hologram

I also have a fox obsession, I own a huge fox plush that takes up a designated corner of my room lol

I don't mind most things personality wise in people, but I do wish to be respected obviously

I like someone I can poke fun at casually and who can poke fun at me as well

My love language is big gift giving (wether it be buying or drawing occasionally) and physical affection (Cuddles always ╥⁠﹏⁠╥)

I've gotten tones of jokes that I only go for gingers, but I have zero preference for looks

I'm an overly patient person and get a little annoyed when people aren't as patient (but it's not a complete put off or anything)

I also am very much someone who has to be on time. If I am not on time I lose it a bit

I think that's all (Maybe too much ´⁠-⁠﹏⁠-⁠`)

But thank you so much in advance! I hope you have an amazing day/week 💟

hi, anon! i haven't read bsd in a while so i'm a little rusty so i only did prsk. hope you still enjoy!

I match you with... (platonically)

Saki Tenma!

-The biggest thing for you to be matched with Saki was the big sister vibes that you mentioned. The dynamic would just be too cute to pass up on!

-I tried to pick a more 'loud' or extroverted person and although I decided to opt for Saki instead of Tsukasa, I think you both would mesh together even when she's not necessarily as loud as her brother.

-Saki is like the person you can fall back onto in social situations when you get anxious. She doesn't mind taking the lead and helping you out when you get nervous.

-She's not someone who gets angry often and tries to be there for you when you ghost her or others. She tries her best to understand what you're feeling and tries to sympathize with you.

-You both having the same energy is something that would make the whole friendship mesh well and she has the capabilities to be calmer or quieter if needed.

I match you with... (romantically)

Shizuku Hinomori!

-Although Shizuku is somewhat different than Saki, I think she's the best match overall. The physical affection she gives to you is one of the big factors.

-As someone who enjoys pda/affection, Shizuku would love to cuddle or hold hands with you all the time. She kisses you in public and just loves to be near you.

-She loves the gifts you give her as well no matter what they are. She'll always gush about them whenever someone asks about something relating to it (whether that embarrasses you or not).

-She's a very light teaser and it comes off more lovingly than anything but she enjoys it when her partner gives her attention through light teasing too.

-Although a bit airheaded, she's treating you similarly to Shiho. Asking always if you're hungry or thirsty, being the talker in public if you need it, etc. She just gives you more romantic affection than sisterly affection (obviously)

#x reader #fluff #gender neutral reader #nian-anon #project sekai #project sekai x reader #saki x reader #saki tenma x reader #saki tenma #shizuku hinomori x reader #shizuku x reader #shizuku hinomori

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insidereagan · 2 years

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Hi there, how are you doing? I was hoping we could please have some headcanons for Reagan, Brett, Gigi, Myc, and Glenn helping the reader recover from psychological/emotional abuse dealt by a relative that seriously damaged the reader’s self esteem.

hello! I’m good thank you, and of course you can!

sfw although mentions of @buse, trauma, panics attacks and that kind of thing

Reagan

she’s in the same position tbh, so she knows how it feels.

therefore she worries about you a shit ton.

once you open up to her about your trauma, she acts surprisingly clingy around you.

she is constantly checking on you, asking if you need a break etc

you reply with “i’ll only take a break if you do, hun,”

you two would most likely get therapy together, despite how hesitant reagan is at first it helps!

but that does mean she’s even more clingy/touchy around you now she’s feeling better. she just craved the touch and love she never got as a kid, but you’re okay with that.

she totally invents stuff to help you

if your ever getting a panic attack, flashback etc etc she’ll always ask if you need a cuddle, and if you!re comfortable with that, you’ll snuggle together and if not, she’ll try and comfort you in other ways.

if you’re both at work, and you need to go home, she’ll drive you home.

overall just really anxious, but grateful to have someone with the same experience, and loves to help you and care for you.

Brett:

same with reagan, he totally understands how you feel.

but holy shit he’s so doting and loving <33

he LOVES to compliment you, hold you, cuddle you and comfort you in any means possible.

he tries to cook after you’ve had a bad day. he’s not very good at first but then he slowly gets better!

I feel like you two would take cooking lessons so you can learn to cook for each other after the other ones had a hard day.

sweet baby brett just wants to give you the love you possibly never received.

he LOVES to tell you you did a good job. and he will.

like you could literally just do the smallest thing, and brett would be so proud of you, hype you up, and tell you how well you did.

he 100% would post pictures of you on social media, and brag about you and make a long ass paragraph about how lovely you are and how grateful he is for you.

your cuddle sessions last over an hour mostly (unless your not comfortable with touch!! then he’d find some other way for you two to connect)

he lets you be as vulnerable as you want around him, and if you ever want to cry into his shoulder, then let him know!

in conclusion, he loves to make you feel loved, because he knows how it feels to be unloved. lots of cuddles, kisses, smiles etc he’s just so caring!

Gigi:

so basically the entirety of the inside job tumblr fandom has decided her love language is gift giving (which it is)

she loves to gift you with things after a bad day (or just gift you on general)

she cares so much and is so worried about you

massive pda fan lol

like when you’re having a hard time, if you’re comfortable (she always asks first) she’ll bring you into the hallways and make out with you <33

she also loved to cuddle with you in bed!

she has literally the comfiest, biggest, fluffiest bed, and she will let you use it anytime.

if your ever having a panic attack, she’s not that experienced but she tries so damn hard!

i feel like she’d do a course or something on how to help you cope with your trauma. and before you know it, she’s a natural!

I feel like she’s the only character in inside job without parent issues, so she’d take you to see her family (if you’re comfortable) and they love you like their own <333

she’d order you sm takeover like <33 you two just slump on the sofa after maybe a flashback, panic attack, or just because and eat and watch tv together

literally just ask her for smth and sje’ll find it somehow

she will reassure you, give you compliments, literally any boost 24/7

she’s just such a supportive and lovely girlfriend, she loves you so much and is so sad for you. although she does worry quite a bit

Myc:

myc tries, he really does

he’s obviously not very good at reassuring so I feel like he’d get you a therapist.

, he’d never joke about your trauma. that’s just a step too far for him.

he never banters you unless you give him permission to!! he doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable.

whenever your feeling bad, he’d try telling jokes to lighten the mood, or telling secrets about ppl at cognito.

he tries to comfort you! even if he’s not that good at first

he wouldn’t tell you this but sometimes he stays up at night thinking about how he doesn’t understand how some parents are allowed to have kids.

Glenn:

like myc, he’s not the most experienced but he tries!

he really loves yoy and is extremely overprotective.

if someone even dares come near you, they’ll regret it.

he’s so scary when he wants to be.

like Gigi, I think he’d do a course to help.

and he’s actually so caring! <33

he helps you calm down so well

he wants to come to your old house and k1ll whoever hurt you, but you stop him

thank you for the request hun! hope you enjoy :)

#inside job #reagan ridley #brett hand #andre lee #gigi thompson #magic myc #glenn dolphman #inside job reagan #inside job brett #autistic reagan ridley #x reader #self insert #adult animation #jr scheimpough

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wwhatev3r · 2 years

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Omg I saw the ship request post and I adore it so much and was wondering if you were still open to it? If so…

(She/Her)

I’m 5’7, dyed hair that goes from my natural brown to a rusty color, and brown eyes. I play bass guitar as well as acoustic guitar and I sing a tad. I’m a pretty extroverted person, even though I have horrible anxiety (that’s what medication is for though, right?). I often find myself being a little bit sarcastic with people and I argue a lot, so I come off as unintentionally rude. I also love watercolor painting as well as other art mediums in general.

I ship you with...

Burton “Pat” Christenson

Note: I’ll do in headcanons style this time because I think It’s easier and fun to read. I hope you like the ship, I know he’s a side character but he was an amazing soldier and deserves more attention. I love him sm. HE’S SO CUTE, LOOK AT HIM.

Okay, look, you guys have a lot in common but also, I could see you being best friends with George Luz. Not many people know but Chris was amazing at drawing (you should check out his drawings on google), singing and playing piano and guitar. He was really athletic and competitive too.

The first time he saw you he was a little intrigued but then he saw you water coloring in a sketchbook and he was like:

“Yeah, I gotta go talk to her.”

He finally had someone to talk about art and even draw with him.

Remember that time he roasted O’Keefe? I feel like you both would like to roast people with sarcastic comments.

It’s more fun when they are dumb and don’t understand sarcasm.

Okay, hang out and draw or paint together? CERTAINLY.

✨ Artistic nights dates✨

I feel like we would play piano for you.

When the pub gets empty you both play for each other.

Or you both play for the company as way to keep their morale up.

Maybe he would get a little competitive but in a friendly way.

When he sings publicly to the company he will pick songs with specific lyrics to secretly dedicate them to you.

He asks you to teach him play bass guitar and he finds you so cool when you’re playing.

He’s just there thinking: “Yeah, that’s my girl.”

Btw, he calls you darling.

Expect many love songs and him looking at you when singing.

Girl-... the height difference is the cutest. He’s 6’0 btw.

When he notices you are anxious or sad he will ask if you want to talk but he will instantly hug you, kiss your forehead and let you cry on his chest.

Maybe even sing for you or grab his guitar and make a stupid song to make you laugh.

He draws you so much, but doesn't like to show you the drawings.

You’re like his muse.

You said you argue a lot, I suppose it is more in terms of your personal opinions or ideas? Whatever it is, it doesn't matter.

When you get in an argument he is the type of person who doesn't raise his voice and likes to talk it out but if the argument escalates he will walk away to be alone.

After everything cools down he meets you in bed to talk to you after what happen and apologize, if the discussion was about personal opinions he will say how stupid the discussion was and make it up to you.

Imagine whatever you like about those last five words.

For him, there’s no going to bed angry. Periodt.

He hypes you up about your art so much.

Or about how pretty you are, he just finds your hair so aesthetic.

“Your hair reminds me of autumn leaves, It’s just so goddamn beautiful.”

After that he will wash you with kisses and admire you (which he does often.)

He loves when you hang out with him and his friends at the pub.

He’s not much into PDA but he does show a little affection in public.

Putting his hand on your waist when he lets you get through the door first, puts his arm around you when you’re sitting by his side.

Even the way he looks at you when you’re talking and the way he smiles, looks like he’s admiring every single detail of your features.

You’re just perfect to him, idk how to explain it.

I hope you like it <3

#easy company #band of brothers #pat christenson #burton christenson #ship requests #band of brothers ship #hbo war #band of brothers headcanons

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thenugking · 1 year

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For the Ask Meme for Sammy

5, 12, 1, 18, 9!

Have some Numbers

right THANK YOU sm for sending me an ask, sorry it took me 200 years to actually answer it!!

1. Basics! Name, age, personality, etc. What do they look like? Are they a new or old oc?

Samantha Cortez, 26 years old maybe?? I think she’s a few months older than Jazz (but in the same school year). Smart, kind and determined, but anxious and full of self doubt.

Her general existence is… nearly a year old now? In that when I started playing Jazz, I knew she had a best friend with this basic personality that she’d do anything for. She’s obviously got more fleshed out as time went on, particularly when I actually started playing her.

5. What was their life like before being iced?

Unideal. She went to the same shitty school as Jazz did, where she did much better academically and was “A Pleasure To Have In Class” but went through a lot of bullying as an Undiagnosed Autistic and often had her struggles overlooked because she was a Smart Quiet Kid. Definitely nothing drawn from my own experience here noooope. Jazz and Sammie were pretty much each other’s first and only friends.

After school, Sammie got a degree in Biology. She wanted a doctorate, but was absolutely unable to afford it, and ended up with a shitty lab assistant job instead and no real way to progress in her field without suddenly becoming very rich. She was the one who was initially interested in the advertisement of a life on Halcyon, hoping that starting somewhere new and smaller would help her distinguish herself in her career and find something more worthwhile to do than washing test tubes. Jazz encouraged her to find the confidence to leave Earth for good.

On family… She was raised by a single mother, who doesn’t always have as much time as she’d like for Sammie, and is maybe a bit too focused on praising her for academic successes than in checking that she’s happy, but is trying her best. She doesn’t always succeed, but it’s a much better relationship than Jazz has with either of her parents, at least. Sammie’s mum did have to die before they left for Halcyon though--Sammie wouldn’t leave Earth if she still had people she loved there. I haven’t put much thought into how it happens, sadly it’s just a plot device to let the story take place, but I think Sammie was around 17 or 18 at the time.

9. What do they think of the factions? Are they liked or disliked by any?

Sammie dislikes the Board, and Sublight, but is supportive of all the individual communities she meets. She wants the best for Edgewater and the Deserters, and for the Iconoclasts and the MSI, and does whatever she can to help them.

The factions have similar feelings about her as she does towards them, although the Board never got to the point of “shoot on sight” with Sammie. She’s at least not as loud about her dislike of them as Jazz is. She also really hates SLUG (or at least Sedrick) which is… a whole thing, but is quiet enough about that to get herself a fairly neutral reputation.

12. Did they save The Hope?

Of course! I feel like, if she’d never known Jazz, Sammie would have been slower to distrust the Board, and could potentially have started down their route, but even then it wouldn’t have lasted very long, because Sammie’s committed to at least trying to do the right thing, and there’s no way abandoning the Hope for the Lifetime Employment Program could be mistaken for the right thing.

Having had Jazz help her realise that authority can be really shitty sometimes, she never even considers working with the Board. And like Jazz, her main goal for the whole game is to get her best friend back. Spoilers it doesn’t work out any better for Sammie than for Jazz!

18. How to win them over?

Lol just tell her she’s very smart and brave and doing very well. Maybe give her a hug too. Or a pack of retro rockets.

Sammie didn’t always get a lot of positive encouragement growing up--she was already a Good Kid, she didn’t “need” it--and is plagued by self doubt. Being nice to her while respecting her abilities is a very good start. A Set Of Morals and a desire to do good really helps too! If you can’t manage that (as a lot of people in Halcyon apparently cannot), reminding her of Jazz also works in Ellie’s case.

#samantha cortez #jasmine davenport #the outer worlds #asks post #asks about ocs #marsh ocs

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bottomvalerius · 2 years

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I am on a train and achey af from yesterday SO I’m finally getting around to the tag game both @claudia-nomusaabara and @poetic-emptiness-fanfic tagged me in like….. over a week ago about current WIPs + future projects I have planned 😅😅😅😅 I’m sorry it’s taken me weeks to get to but thank you sm for tagging me ❣️❣️

I love a good list and that’s all I have brain for atm SO other than the last two prompts for MM & Sam being wrekt week, the WIPs I want to go back to are:

AU Hunter/prey fic with Tasya, Valerius, and Donna 🤭 I started it at the peak of my Lady D thirst and I really should finish it. I got through all of the build up, now is just the spicy bits lmao

I am going to force myself to finish the Sam/Nasrin fic even though I am now deeply insecure about it LMFAO again, I really just need to get to the spice, but 😵‍💫

Sam/Valerius fic where Sam chokes Val with his braid and Valerius (regrettably) enjoys it a lot. Things get weird & intense before they got really kinky LMAO

Sam & Nadia bond over siblings, family expectations, running away from home and craving it all the same, and horses!

I do want to go back to the kinktober fics. I psyched myself out way too much, and MM has really helped boost my confidence :’) I enjoyed the plans I made and I have a lot written that I never posted so that may be a long term summer project

Fics I would like to start:

In general I need to update everyone’s refs and bios :’)

I just need more Damien stuff LOL smut and serious stuff. I’m bubbling over something with him and Gawain, but I also want to do more with Naima and Antony. Would also love to do something about what it was like being raised with the courtiers lol

Some snapshots (and angst lol) of Donna’s childhood; I wana do more serious fics with them at some point and I’ve been having Family thoughts buzzing in my brain

Donna escapades @ the Pearl Isles. I do wana do fic of their first time meeting Sam too. I just have. Lots of Sam/Donna thots LOL

I wana redo Val and Donna meeting and maybe some short ones of what their courtship was like. Possibly do a breakup fic too LOL just more couple things I hint @ in fics but haven’t actually given time to shine

I do wana do some sad Sam and family fics. I like to make Sam. Feel things. That aren’t just horny and mad LMAO

I’m going to be annoying and say if you want to do this please do LMAO tagging people makes me overly anxious but I do wana hear the besties’ plans 👁👁💕

#rambling #WIP #Damien clawing @ my skull like WRITE ME WRITE ME WRITE ME LMAO

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correctdangerousfellows · 3 years

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Hello! Thanks again for your hard work! I wonder if you're interested in writing hcs about dfel boys falling in love with someone. Not necessarily x readers headcanons but something about how they would feel and how they would show it 👉👈

hello and of course anon! i hope these are what you’ve asked for!

the dangerous fellows boys falling in love

ethan

- this poor boy would be a HUGE mess because let’s be honest here he’s never fallen in love with someone before

- whenever you look at him he becomes bright red and looks away bc he’s so shy around u

- he doesn’t even realize how bad he has it for you until somebody on his baseball team brings up the topic of being in a relationship and his mind immediately goes to you

- he never stopped thinking about you after that

- he’s not the best with words, so he tries to be around you a lot more. he doesn’t like the thought of you being in a place where he can’t protect you

- in addition, he makes an effort to talk with you a lot more. he’s generally much more open with you and tries to crack a joke or two just to see you smile

- if you’re in his class he’s not gonna sleep throughout the entire time for once

- whatever activities or hobbies you like he’ll try to pick up and learn more about it just to have more conversations with you

- would cut his baseball practices short just to walk you home or take you somewhere

- he’s absolutely whipped for u please be whipped for him back i’m begging

harry

- growing up he’s never dreamed of falling in love because of his parents

- he didn’t want to put himself in that type of situation so he’s always been very distant with the idea of love

- falling in love with you tho,,, was something he did not see coming

- but at the same time, how could he not?

- he loves everything about you

- he grows to relish the warm n fuzzy feeling in his heart whenever he sees you

- he’s always been a sweetheart, but with you he’s even more gentle and caring

- offers you his help every chance he gets, brings you a small snack everyday, sends you good morning and good night texts, etc. you’re basically his entire world and he treats you like it

- when he’s around you his headaches doesn’t hurt that much anymore

- he embraces his love for you and while he’s a bit nervous about everything because he doesn’t want to wind up like his dad, but with you, he’s more than willing to take the chance

zion

- this man has never once considered falling in love with someone since he automatically assumes that people just want him for his money

- so when you came along he’s suddenly dealing with this new weird feeling in his chest and this idiot immediately dismissed it as being sick

- he panics when the feeling doesn’t go away

- he realizes he’s in love the moment he sees you laugh and he realizes that he’ll do anything just to see you like that again

- he makes up random excuses to be around you more

- you’re going to get lunch? he insists on taking you out because “you probably forgot your wallet so he’s coming just in case”

- you need to go do homework? for the first time in his life he’ll go to the library because “he also had to study for that biology test on friday” he never studies

- ditches all his hang out plans with his friends for you

- he especially loves teasing you because he loves the reaction he gets out of you but he never passes the limit

- he swallows his pride and tries asking somebody like lawrence what to do confessing for you because he’s just so incredibly in love with you and wants to give you the absolute best

eugene

- the moment he realizes he’s in love with you is when he’s trying to write a song and his mind is literally just you

- enters the first stage of grief, denial

- “maybe if i ignore it long enough it’ll go away”

- it doesn’t

- a complete tsundere, he acts like he doesn’t care but the moment you say that you’re cold this man is stripping for u LOL

- shyly asking you if you could hear his new songs

- gets flustered about EVERYTHING. he thinks you’re the most adorable person in the world and he hates it bc it’s hard to look at u without blushing

- he does extra stuff for you. buys you food, waits for you outside your classroom, and is always keeping you company

- he tells you about his dreams and goals, and you’re the first one to ever hear his songs. he gets nervous singing to you because you’re his audience, but when he stares at your face and sees how gorgeous your eyes are, he no longer feels anxious

- when you’re not with him, he becomes a bit more cranky and gloomy. he doesn’t like the small ache in his heart whenever you’re not around

- takes weeks to write a song just for you to tell you about his true feelings

lawrence

- dude has the same routine everyday

- all he does is go to school, study until 3 in the morning, sleep, repeat

- he doesn’t really particularly look forward to anything until he met you

- he has never ever considered the concept of love bc his parents refused to let him date, so his heart beating faster and his face becoming red whenever you were around was definitely a surprise. he’s not stupid tho so he figures out that he likes you pretty fast

- tries to ignore his growing feelings for you because he wants to prioritize his schoolwork, but he can’t help but stare at you a lot more

- once he got the opportunity he offered to tutor you on certain subjects

- takes you out on study dates in coffee shops

- yall don’t get any studying done LMAO u guys got too carried away with talking but it’s fine bc u both managed to get ur homeworks done somehow

- whatever you tell him he remembers. homeboy remembers every single detail about u bc he pays sm attention to u

- he's also whipped af u could muse about wanting something and he'll get it for you asap

- extremely patient with you, drops his own work to help you with your own

- he becomes one of your teacher’s assistants just so whenever he came across grading your work he can give you the automatic 100%

- he’s completely fallen for you, he doesn’t care about his parents’ stupid rule about dating anymore. as long as he has you and can make you happy, he’ll be more than welcome to be your boyfriend

this was extremely fun to write, thank you for the request anon!

> lychee

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marvelsimp · 3 years

Text

The New Kid: Arriving

Ch. 2

The New Kid Masterlist

Genre: Fluff, Angst Pairing: Peter x Lesbian!reader (Platonic duh) , Avengers & Reader Warnings: General angst, swearing, Description: It’s the reader’s birthday so Peter takes her to Avenger’s Tower and there are a few surprises along the way. Reader’s Powers: Healing, telepathy, and empath. Word Count: 3,073

“So, what are the plans for today?”

“You’ll just have to find out,” Peter said smiling.

“Come on its my birthday, you gotta tell me,” you whined.

“Don’t worry it’ll be fun but first, donuts.” He opened the door to a donut shop that you were just about to walk past. You grinned; donuts were definitely one of your favorite things for breakfast. Peter quickly went up to the counter and ordered two chocolate donuts for himself and then your two favorites.

“How’d you know my order? We’ve never gotten donuts together,” you said while sitting down at a table.

He looked at you a little offended. “Y/n, we’ve known each other for almost a year know. And you talk about food, especially breakfast food way, too, much.”

‘Fair enough,” you scoffed.

You and Peter sat there eating for maybe fifteen minutes when Peter suddenly got up, “Looks like our ride is here.”

You looked out and there was a black car that had just pulled up. You shot Peter a confused look but decided asking questions would get you nowhere. So, you followed him out and got in the car door he opened for you.

“Happy, this is Y/n. Y/n, this is Happy,” Peter said while getting into the car himself.

You waved and smiled at Happy, he nodded and then started driving. “So, umm,” you weren’t quite sure where you were going with that much less where you were going at all.

“Y/n, calm down,” he teased. “I wouldn’t make you do anything you aren’t comfortable with, especially on your birthday.”

You let out a sigh. The rest of the car trip there wasn’t much talking, you just looked out the window and took in the city that was becoming your new home. When you finally arrived you had no clue where you were until you got out of the car and looked up. Your eyes grew wide in surprise and excitement. “What the hell, Parker?” You exclaimed while slapping Peter’s arm.

“Surprise,” he grinned.

You were at Avengers Tower; you’d always wanted to go since if first opened after the attack on New York. The first two floors were open to the public but the rest of the floors were for the Avengers, it was very rare for anyone else to be allowed to enter.

Peter just smiled interlocking your arms together and walked you into the building. Over the next two hours you walked from one station to another. Some were a bit more historic and just listed facts about important Avenger events. Some were video games or short documentaries about each individual avenger, or at least most of them. Your favorite one was the VR game where you got to play as an Avenger, you chose Captain Marvel while Peter chose Ironman.

When you had seemingly finished, you were a little sad but Peter quickly lifted you spirts, “Don’t worry I have another surprise.”

You could feel the excitement absolutely radiate off of him, you were pretty sure that even if you didn’t have powers that you’d still feel it. Peter grabbed your hand and dragged you out of the building. He led you the back of the building to a garage like area and then to an elevator. You quickly caught on. He was taking you to the upper levels, the Avengers Levels.

“Peter, your n-“

“Friday, I have a guest. Let Mr. Stark know that we’re here.”

“Yes, Mr. Parker he is already aware. Would you like me to send you straight up to him?”

“Yes, please,” he said while stepping onto the elevator, dragging you along.

“Peter, are you introducing me to THE Tony Stark?”

He nodded. “Oh yeah,” he perked up, “Friday, this is Y/n Y/l/n. Y/n, this is Friday.”

“Hello, Miss Y/l/n. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“It’s, um, nice to meet you, too,” you say looking at the ceiling.

“She’s Mr. Stark’s AI for the building. She’s also in his suits,” Peter explained.

“Like Karen?”

“Like Karen.”

You were anxious to say the least. You were in Avengers tower and about to meet TONY STARK. You collected yourself as the elevator rose, taking in a few breaths. “You could’ve warned me.”

“Surprising you is more fun.”

You rolled your eyes, “My own best friend keeping such a big secret from me!”

“Hmm, like you haven’t kept anything from me.”

“That’s different!”

You both had big smiles on your faces as the elevator doors opened and there they were the Avengers. Your face dropped, “Holy fuck!” You said that a lot louder than you meant, your hands covered your mouth, as the Avengers turned their heads to look at you. You quickly slid over in the elevator to be out of their lines of view as you could hear a few snickers. You turned to Peter slapping his arm a few times. “You asshole!” you whispered angrily.

“Sorry! Sorry!” he laughed. “You should’ve seen the look on your face, though!”

“Peter! Those are the Avengers! Why are you laughing?!?!”

“Come on, Y/n. They’ll love you and I’m not the one who just screamed ‘fuck,’” he whispered in your ear.

You muttered trying to figure out what to say. You sighed at the stupid boy in front of you then you took a deep breath in. “Fine. Oh my god.”

You shook off your anxiety and when you were ready you gave Peter a light shove, making him lead the way. The room, or what ever it was, was huge. The main section, or where the Avengers were, was elevated from where the elevator was so you had to look up at them. It was to say the least intimidating, but they all seemed to just be hanging out on the couches that were on the platform.

You looked to the left, right over Peter’s shoulder, and there he was Tony Fucking Stark. Right behind him were Steve Rodgers and Bucky Barnes who were talking between themselves. Close behind them was the Falcon, you only didn’t know his name because the public didn’t know his name. Some of the Avengers were like that, their true names weren’t know so the media used other names, such as Falcon, Spider-Man, Scarlet Witch, Hawkeye and a few more. You had stopped walking and there he was, your mind was running at light speed while your mouth hadn’t even started walking yet.

“Y/n, this is Mr. Stark. Mr. Stark, this is Y/n!” said Peter who was once again beaming with excitement.

“Tony, please,” Mr. Sta-Tony corrected. “I can never convince him to call me that.”

You turned your head to seen Peter’s face go a little red, causing you to chuckle. You turned back to Tony, you were amazed… more like in shock. “I-It’s an honor to meet you.” You felt like you should bow or something, they were like royalty to you but you resisted the urge. “And yeah Peter’s likes that, an idiot. Umm, I can’t believe I’m meeting you, cause someone decided not to tell me.” Tony smirked at your response. “I’d love to ask you about your suits, they are absolutely amazing! Especially the nano technology its incredible.”

“We can talk about that later, kid. But for now, you gotta meet the rest of the crew.” With that he walked away, back to the platform with the couches.

“You’re trying to kill me, Parker,” you whispered in your best friend’s ear as the three men who had been behind Tony approached.

You were freaking out all over again. Three more Avengers, you were meeting Avengers.

“Steve,” the blond man reached his hand out.

“Y/n,” you said reaching to shake Captain America’s hand. “And you’re, uh, Bucky.” He just nodded in return. You turned to the other man, you scrunched your face saying a sort of sorry.

The man just stepped forward, barley bumping into Bucky, “Sam.”

“What the hell was that for?” Bucky growled, clearly angry that Sam had touched him.

“Language,” said Steve who looked like he was dealing with two toddlers.

“Don’t ‘language’ me,” he turned back to Steve. “She just said a way worse word than that, not even five minutes ago!” he said pointing his finger at you. You gritted you teeth and turned your head a little in shame.

Steve scoffed at Bucky then turned back to you. “Nice to meet you, doll,” he says grabbing Bucky’s metal arm dragging him and Sam away from you and Peter.

That whole interaction through you off. “That was-“

“Weird?”

“Yeah, this one hundred percent makes me feel like I’m in a fanfic,” you say trying to ease your anxieties.

He just blushes.

“Come on I’m not even talking about sm-”

“Ahem,” a brunette woman coughs to get your attention. You look over and there are the Scarlet Witch and Natasha Romanoff. You blush, both of them are a lot prettier in person and they caught you in the middle of a weird sentence. “I’m Wanda,” she says with a kind smile. The rest of the Avengers seemed excited or at least a little happy and she was but you could also feel her mourning. A type of mourning she was hiding away, trying to ignore, wouldn’t accept. You understood that kind of mourning.

“And I’m Nat. Oh, and you might want to watch out.”

Suddenly you were grabbed from behind and picked up. “Lady Y/n,” said the thundering voice, “It is an honor to meet you.”

You got the wind knocked out of you but you eventually let out a big long laugh. You turned your head and as you had suspected it was Thor. “It’s nice to meet you too,” you giggled.

“How about you let her down now?” instructed it calm voice behind you. With that Thor set you gently on the ground. “I’m Bruce,” stated the man stepping around the god to see you.

Your eyes widen, you have Dr. Bruce Banner in front of you. You were going to ask about his PhDs or something along those lines, but you were interrupted by Friday.

“I would like to inform everyone that lunch is now ready.”

Everyone made their way to a large table. You clutched onto Peter’s arm hoping you didn’t faint or get overwhelmed and have an anxiety attack, even though you were surprisingly calm. You ended up sitting with Peter on your left and Wanda on your right. You soon discovered that lunch was pizza. Thank god. You were afraid it was going to be something fancy. Wanda offered to get you some you favorites using her powers, to which you accepted.

“So, Y/n,” Tony started, “Peter tells me that you’ve already graduated from high school.”

“Uh, yeah. After the blip, when I came back, my school was no longer running so I decided to do school from home. It was just easier so I spent my time pouring over my studies and working on some projects. I finished what would usually be five semesters in about five months?”

Tony seemed to be impressed. “Tell me about the projects you were working on.” You looked over to Peter, kind of asking if he had told him about your powers. It took him a second to understand but he returned with a nod. “After I came back I discovered my powers so I used an old microscope and collected some of my blood to study.” You went on to explain your process and what you found. You then continued by talking about your projects. The avengers would ask questions, mostly Tony, Bruce, and Peter.

Then you felt it, it was like someone was screaming in your ear. Loki. That couldn’t be right, Loki died during one of the battles with Thanos. As you began to understand and test your powers you learned that a person’s subconscious was almost always saying their name, the only time that becomes loud enough for you to hear is when the person is trying to focus or is under a crap ton of stress. The screaming persisted. You finally decided to turn you powers completely on to figure out exactly where it was coming from. You finally discovered it to be the man who seemed to be preparing some desserts. The voice screaming Loki over and over continued to grow louder and louder. The sound was banging around your skull causing you to develop a slight headache. You turned to Wanda, you wanted to make sure before you started to throw around accusations of Loki being in Avengers Tower. “Wanda,” you whispered in her ear, “could you read that guy’s mind over there. Something feels off.”

She nodded her head. Her eyes had a very faint red glow to them. After a few seconds she suddenly stood up causing everyone to turn their heads to her, a few them went into instant defense mode, ready for a fight. Her hands began to glow red and the man was now surrounded in the red glow too. “Reveal yourself or I will,” she demanded.

The man groaned and rolled his eyes. “Come on,” he said while transforming and revealing himself to be Loki.

Thor stood up quickly his happy demeanor turned mincing as he held his hand out for what you assumed to be for Mjolnir to arrive.

Peter quickly picked you up from your chair and ran you out to the elevator. Which was smart because now there was yelling and screaming. “Friday take us to the game floor… Shit!” Peter grinned punching your arm slightly.

“Didn’t know I could do that.”

“No, just didn’t expect Loki to be here much less alive!”

You went on to explain to Peter how you had discovered the God of Mischief while to elevator when down. Eventually it stopped and you two got out. You finished your story just as Peter opened the first door.

“This is the gym.” It was a expansive room, a portion of it was just the usual work out gear, a ginormous rock wall, and a boxing ring. “Over here is my favorite bit.” Peter led you to a door. When you stepped through it was full of walls that didn’t meet the ceiling, little secret paths and quite a few upper platforms.

“This is where we play laser tag,” Peter explained, “It’s meant for training but also fun! Everything can be changed with a push of a button.” He walks over to a panel on the wall and pushes a few buttons on the tablet. The room then shifts and changes, its now a little more direct with a lot of less tunnels and more simple hiding spots. Peter then walks over to a wall that has some vests and weapons. He turns to you with a cheeky grin, “Do you wanna play?”

You smile reaching your hand out to receive a vest. “Game on.”

You and Peter play for who knows how long, but it distracted both of you from what happened upstairs. Even with both of your regenerative abilities you were both panting and sweating after half a dozen rounds but still having fun. Then Friday spoke up, “Peter, Mr. Stark has informed me that you need to check your phone.” You both pause your game; Peter reaches for his back pocket and reads a message.

“What does it say?”

“Umm, he just wanted to let us know that they got Loki,” he says peeking up from behind a wall then you shoot at him missing. “Cheater!” After a few more rounds Peter asks, “Do you want to continue the tour? We can always come back here later.”

“Yes, please,” you say catching your breath. You and Peter put up the gear, get some water and then exit the gym area. He shows you a massive olympic size pool with several diving boards of different heights. Then he takes you to a huge game room. It has several TVs, computers, there’s even a small VR room, and of course there are tons of board games.

Since he got that text form Tony, Peter’s excitement keeps growing and growing. “You have another surprise, what is it?”

Peter opens his mouth then closes and he lets out a sigh, he’s a terrible liar and you’re basically a walking talking lie detector. “Come on,” he lets out sounding a little defeated.

You let out a chuckle, he leads you back to the elevator. “Friday, take us to the living area”

The elevator rises. It takes you to a common area, there’s a kitchen, dining table, and a tv with some couches and chairs all in the same room. You assume, like Peter said, that this is where the avengers live.

“I wanted to show you the labs first, but I think you’ll like this a little more. This is where the Avengers live,” he grins like he always does with pure joy escaping him. “The Starks’ have the Penthouse, so they don’t have rooms down here and there’s a floor just for King T’Challa and his family, Princess Shuri’s nice you’d love her.” He leads you to a hallway with several doors. “At the end of the hall there is a guest room on each side. This hall has War Machine’s, Hawkeye’s, Widow’s, Antman’s, Dr. Banner’s, and Dr. Strange’s rooms.” He had pointed to each one respectively. He then walks to the opposite side of the living space and to another hallway. Instead of stopping before the hallway he continued walking into it. “These on the left are Falcon’s, Wanda’s, Bucky’s, and Steve’s. On the right there’s Captain Marvel’s, Thor’s, mine, and this one...” he opens door that’s in between his and Thor’s and walks in, you follow. “This is yours.”

You let out a gasp and put your hand to your mouth. All of your stuff is here, your bedding, posters, pictures, clothes, all of it. You can feel the tears streaming down your face and you turn to Peter who is smiling with tear filled eyes. “What?” you breathe out not sure what to say. Peter simply pointed to a note on the bed. You walk over to it and read it:

“Welcome to the team, we got a lot to talk about but for now enjoy. -The Avengers”

“I..” you turn to Peter who is now crying, too. You walk to him and engulf him in a hug and whisper, “Thank you.”

Next Chapter

Arriving-deleted Scene

#avengers #the avengers #avengers x reader #angst #fluff #avengers x lesbian #peter parker #peter parker x platonic!reader #avengers x fem!reader #LGBT #x reader #the new kid

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stargaze-issei · 4 years

Note

Stoner Hawks being on patrol with him and maybe having a fire quirk (Dabi’s sis blue flames but you know Endevor don’t know that maybe she knows Dabi is her brother and knew that he ran away and never told her dad about it and how often she sees him but n e way she’s a hero did the whole UA thing) and being on patrol on top a building Keigo rolls a joint and moves on in readers direction like “can you spark it?🥺” maybe just smoking maybe some smut

this made me sO soft, like yes stoner hawks being the cutest 🥺 i got a little carried away with it, and somehow it ended up being 2.1k long ( ´◡‿ゝ◡`) thank u sm for requesting, i loved it.

stoner!takami with a todoroki!reader.

summary; in the request.

genre; fluff, smut.

warnings; daddy kink, praise kink, breeding kink, oral (receiving-giving), curse words, idk fucking(? smut in general.

word count; 2.1k

author's note; don't judge me it's my first time writing smut ):

your phone rang in the pocket of your hero costume, the id showing a smiley keigo. despite knowing what was about to happen, you couldn't avoid your own smile. as you answered, the first thing you heard was wind on his side of the line, you sighed, he was probably calling while flying, again.

"one of this days, you're going to crash against a plane" his melodic laugh reached through the speaker. damn, how could you stay mad when he's laughing like that?

"i'm going to assume you're already at our spot, gorgeous" this time you laughed, nervously, takami hated waiting more than anything, and there you were, thirty minutes away from your meeting point. "send me your location, i'm picking you up" and just as fast, he hung up. flying with him was a better idea than running through the city by yourself, therefore, you did as he said.

a giggle escaped your mouth, he had that effect on you, despite of knowing each other for that long. it didn't matter how many times he called you pretty, gorgeous, angel, your face instantly heated up. and he loved it, it gave you a fake innocence, that he sure knew was oly a facade. in less than five minutes, his mighty figure covered the sun above you, looking like that, he could easily be confused by an angel send from heaven.

"i know i'm hot, but you're drooling a bit" takami, the endless teaser.

"let's just go" he picked you up, bridal style, gaining a few curious glares.

your relationship, if you could call it that, had always been a subject of gossip. not you nor him had either confirmed it or deny the rumors about it, truth be told, not even you knew what you were. it was more than friendship, but not as committed as an actual couple. you were used to kiss him, sleep with him, get high with him, and that was enough. there were feelings between, from both parts, but this was the best way. two heroes, in the peak of their careers, had no time for anything else. the ride to your usual vigilance spot was short, hawks flying at a dangerous speed, despite your complete trust in him, you still wondered if he could drop you.

"what took you so long?" he asked, once you were sitting in the edge of the tall building. you sighed, to keep that secret from him was exhausting, at least.

"my brother called".

an awkward silence grew, takami knew you were endeavor's oldest daughter, his pride and joy, wether you liked it or not. obviously he knew your brother had to be endeavor's lost son, touya. what you had kept to yourself was he went now by the name dabi, a faithful follower of the hero killer's ideals.

"is he okay?"

"mhm, he needed money".

keigo wasn't going to tell you this, but every time you said you brother called because he needed something, his blood boiled in his veins. ignoring the fact that he had to stay hidden, for some reason you wouldn't say, to hawks it seemed like he only reached out to you out of material need, meanwhile you were always preocuppied with his well. takami's hand found its way to yours, even wtih gloves you could feel his warmness.

"oh, right, i-i've been saving this for us" he took a small plastic bag out of his pocket, letting you see those green herbs. by the looks, it had to be more expensive than usual. you gasped, in a really cute way, hawks thought. no words were needed, he grindered the pot before rolling a joint. his tongue appeared to seal it, looking straight into your eyes while licking it. he knew exactly what he was doing. "may you do the honors, angel face" a small blue flame igniciate in the tip of your index finger, just as he inhale for the first time.

takami, covered in a cloud of smoke, holding a blunt on his hand, adding that chilled look in his face. was certainly a sight to see.

unspokenly, he handed it over to you. with a smile on you face, you hit it for the first time. for a while, non of you talked, just enjoying each other's company, in fact, those moments with keigo were you favorite, you didn't have to worry for anything besides him. and he thought the same, there, he could stop being hawks, he could be just keigo, your long term friend, leaving all the responsabilities of being a hero in the ground. with you, he felt like flying.

by pure coincidence, he caught you looking at his profile. the moonlight made you have a different kind of glow, like a fairy, he thought. almost withouth realizing, he leaned over to you, his lips seeking yours rather desperately. his hand wondered to your hair, finding its place in the back of your neck, pulling you closer and making sure you weren't escaping. his experimented tongue made its way into your mouth, going through every place he already knew like it was the first time. he tasted like smoke. once he knew you were on the same page, he pushed you back on solid ground, laying on top of you. a moan left your lips, drowned by his own mouth, when his still dressed hips impacted against you.

every touch was being enhanced by the effect of the pot. he pulled away, breaking the moment. he needed to look at you, your lust filled eyes, your half opened mouth. it was enough to get him hard in his pants. with a quick movement, he took out his gloves, fastly moving to take off your complicated hero costume. maybe it was because he was blown out of his mind, or he was just to eager to see your naked body, but he had a serious struggle doing it, making a soft giggle leave your throat.

"you could help me instead of laughing at me" he whined, jokingly upset.

"and miss the hawks having troubles with a bra? i don't think so" that seemed to made him even more anxious, you knew he was done when a small "finally" was whispered.

between laughs, giggles and smirks, he got back on top of yours. he liked to feel you naked underneath him, having you to his complete disposal, and not losing a single item of his clothes. you weren't letting him enjoy the moment to much, a girl has her need, and touching his work out abs was certainly a need. you removed his shirt, smiling at his messy hair.

he started to leave a trace of kisses from your lips to you r collarbone, licking, biting, leaving small dark marks on your skin. just at that, you became a moaning mess, there was something so dirty about takami marking your body.

"babygirl, i haven't even started" with that, you closed your eyes, giving into pleasure as his kisses got lower and lower. when he got to your breast, your nipples were already hard, expecting to feel his wet mouth any moment now. but that wasn't all that happened, almost at the same time, you felt a hand opening its way to your drenched cunt. "look at that, you're already so wet from my mouth only".

his tongue circle you nip at a killing pace, while two fingers found their way inside you without any warning. so thight, he said, his mind already thinking on how well you could take his cock. with his thumb in the perfect position, he started massaging your swollen clit. all you could do was melt in his touch. his free hand reached to the last bit of the blunt, which rested at a safe distance. he got up, leaving you kneeled in front of him.

"open your mouth, princess" despite his loving tone, he wasn't asking, so you did as you were told and watched him hit the last of the joint, keeping as much smoke as he could beofre leaning towards you. with a kiss, he shared it with you, entangling your tongues. he licked your lips, getting back up, his hand resting on the waist of his pants. "you're gonna be a good girl, aren't you, princess?" he got his hips so close to your face that your mouth watered.

"yes, daddy" you knew calling him that was a trigger. he took out his fat dick outside his pants, so hard that it was starting to hurt. his hand placed on the back of your head, guiding you to your objective.

as soon as your lips wrapped around the tip of his cock, he let out a unsually deep growl. takami never lasted that long, and being under the inffluence of weed wasn't helping. he couldn't even look down at you, the sight of your angel face, looking so fucking pretty while sucking him off, he was barely controlling himself from your noises. you struggled, gagging every once in a while, but never stopped, he loved to see the tears in your eyes. when he felt close, his dick twitch in your mouth, you tasted the precum coming out of him. before doing it, he pulled your hair back, avoiding it.

"my baby, you do it so good, do you think you deserve a reward?" to those words, you couldn't help but moan. his hand held your chin, making you look straight into his eyes.

"please, daddy, please eat me out" he felt like losing his mind hearing you begging like that, who was him to deny it. a kiss left in your lips, before kneeling down facing your wet, juicy, cunt. thanks for the meal, he thought.

his tongue worked wonders. the second he met your needy clit, you were actually watching the stars. the ability he had, going between your folds, sucking just in the right spot, fucking you with his tongue. he had you a screaming and drooling mess in a minute.

"daddy! oh god, yes! there, keep going, please! fuck me, yes!" he loved hearing you going crazy because of him, he loved being able to do as he pleased with you. he could hear your moans forever.

he knew you too well, instantly he could tell you were close to cum, he wasn't going to let that happen, he wanted you to cum in his dick, breaking your back, leaving you so fucked up you wouldn't be able to walk afterwards. feeling him leave you on the edge was torture.

"are you so desperate for me, little bird?" he crawled to you, placing his hips on top of yours. you weren't even thinking when he kissed you, loving the thought of you tasting yourself. you wrapped your hands around his neck, reaching his back, if there was something he liked was you scratching his back until it bleed.

with a slow, gentle hursh, he deepend inside you, admiring the image of you closing your eyes at the pain. even prepared and lubed, he was just too big for you. as he felt you adptaing, his pace got faster and harder, his hands grabbed tightly into your hips, probably leaving bruises afterwards. in less than a minute, he already had a constant pace inside you, hitting your spot with every thurst. you whimpers and his groans mixed in the air. one of his hands travelled to your neck, applying a little pressure on it while his thumb fitted in your mouth. that was the view he wanted to see for his whole life.

"you're such a slut, baby girl, but you're my slut, right?" you sucked his thumb, your mind couldn't form coherent words and his finger didn't let you speak. "oh yes, cum with me, princess, cum for daddy" his words were like music to your ears.

the orgasm you repressed for a while felt so close, when you finally reached it, your walls clenched around his dick even harder than before, a scream of pleasure filling the atmosphere. not long after, you felt his warm cum exploding inside you, his grab hardened and a moan left his lips. he stayed there for a while, retaking his breath.his wings served as a wall for the cold wind running. finally, he retired from you, laying at your side while hugging you with one of his arms.

you looked at him, despite not being your actuall boyfriend, he loved you as much as you loved him. though tired, the fuzzy feeling inside you didn't stop, you wondered if it was just you being still high as a rocket, or if that's what love felt like.

#bnha x reader #bnha x y/n #mha x reader #hawks x reader #hawks smut #mha hawks #bnha hawks #hawks imagine #hawksbnha #takami keigo #takami keigo x reader #mha takami keigo #takami keigo smut #takami keigo imagines #bnha smut #mha smut #pro heroes #pro hero hawks #– star's; request!

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yoshkeii · 3 years

Text

Bokuto Confession hcs!

࿐ character: Bokuto Koutarou

࿐ genre: fluff, soft, confessions!

࿐ requested by: GreenTheSimp on Ao3!

࿐ imagine/scenario: “some Bokuto headcannons on how he asks Khai out? Plus maybe him being a goof towards his s/o.”

A/N: fyi, most of these will be coming from my Ao3 since I started writing there first! it’s not much and i generally don’t proof read these so im sorry if there are small errors, this one is a bit longer since I made two chapters for it. im so bad at writing istg,,

≫ ──── ≪ Confession Time ≫ ──── ≪

❀ First, Bokuto would be oblivious to his crush and his feelings for you till it was brought up multiple times by his team, and eventually at the volleyball camp from the other schools. Most likely Kuroo nagging him about the certain someone, Khai, Bokuto talks about so much.

❀ You and Bokuto were friends for quite some time, maybe at least a year or so. And being in the same class as him, you guys had time to interact with each other and even plan hangouts whenever you could.

❀ And yes, this man talks 24/7 about you without even noticing- this varies from your interactions during the school day, your conversations during classes and lunch, stupid dumb texts you guys have once in a while, the answers you give him from the many of many questions he asked you... the list goes on and on. This makes it easy for his friends to identify his fucking crush on you. him being so oblivious about it hurts their brains istg

❀ He's extremely bubbly around you, super friendly and kind but you usually brush it off as his normal personality. ibetyou'llbeoblivioustooaboutit.

❀ Once Bokuto awakened to his crush and feelings for you he found it extremely difficult to act like it was normal before. The slight blush on his cheeks was a much solid shade. His heart skipping beats every time he saw you walk in the room. Your laugh, your smile, anything about you made him so nervous around you now. When you directly smile at him, hearing your laughs at his jokes or actions will make this man just seize to exist.

❀ Bokuto can't stop thinking about you after that thought, always finding his mind wandering to the dorkiest, sappy shit thing he would do with you.

❀ Sometimes he found himself avoiding you at some points just so he can keep himself in check and not be an embarrassment around you-

❀ He still craves your attention but he gets a lingering fear he might mess something up so he has an internal fight with himself and it just- hurts him sm- poor owl,,

❀ Akaashi finds himself trying to motivate and support emo Bokuto at these moments, usually through texts or calls when they aren't near each other etc.

❀ You would generally think he would just confess to you as soon as he had the chance but actually took this on a slow thoughtful ride. To the point, it did affect his skill at practice, which notified his teammates about it fairly quickly. Bokuto was so deep in thought about it all he was unsure how to process his confession, when, where, what would make you happy, if you liked him back and such.

❀ This eventually leads to him asking Akaashi, the team, and friends (from the other teams' ofc-), on how he should confess to you. All of the answers didn't seem to fit Bokuto in a comfortable way either, which is hella surprising. Before he decided to do something pretty simple.

❀ Earlier today, Bokuto asked you to wait for him a few minutes after class. Knowing you two had different club activities after school, him having volleyball and you have [Khai's favorite activity]. It was the best option to get your attention since your clubs ended at different times made it difficult. And so you did, meeting him outside of your classroom, just you and him.

❀ Bokuto felt anxious about being alone with you, especially like this.

❀ "Hey, Khai..?"

❀ "What is it, Bo?"

❀ That little nickname you gave him, always and I mean always made his heart skip 10 beats. The blush on his cheeks grew a shade darker.

❀ "Wanna walk home.. t-together...?" Bokuto quickly mustered out the words, knowing his throat would dry up sooner or later.

❀ Both of you actually took a similar route home after school, which you guys figured out on a rainy day.

❀ "Oh, sure! Don't you have practice though?" You tilted your head innocently, your hair moving as well revealing the smallest of details that made Bokuto swoon.

❀ "Coach said we should rest for our game tomorrow"

❀ "Ah- that makes sense, I forgot about that-" You giggled lightly before you took the lead of heading out of the building.

❀ Bokuto froze at your giggle before you dragged him behind you. Your hand softly around his wrist. "C'mon slowpoke," you teased.

❀ He smiled slightly before he caught up to you. Walking aside from you at the same pace.

❀ It was an awkward walk. Bokuto was oddly quiet which made you slightly worried.

❀ "Bokuto? You alright..?" You finally broke the silence, looking up at the Ace to your right.

❀ "P-perfectly fine!"

❀ "You stuttered."

❀ "Did... I..?"

❀ "Yes, dummy- What's wrong?"

❀ "I-... Damn it. Khai."

❀ Before you knew it, he pulled you into a kiss. His large hands cupping your face as he planted his lips softly onto yours, pulling away from a little with only a few inches from your lips. Bokuto looked straight into your brown eyes, staring back with his golden eyes. The blush on his cheeks flushed with shades of red.

❀ "I like you. Wait- No.. I love you." Bokuto muttered softly, feeling his breath on your lips made you shiver.

❀ You just giggled, before it grew into genuine laughter. He widened his eyes removing his hands from your face.

❀ "H-hey..!! What's so funny!?"

❀ "It was so obvious Bo~"

❀ "Was.. was it!? I-"

❀ You cut him off, "I love you too Koutarou."

❀ Him hearing you use his first name WITH you saying ily to him, made his day. A bright smile plastered on his face, he hugged you lifting you up and kissing your face all over.

❀ "HEY HEY HEYYYY!! Khai likes me back!! Actually, Khai LOVES me!" Bokuto exclaimed happily

❀ After that, Bokuto was back to his normal, loud, excited self throughout the walk. You guys began to have your simple conversations again, him poking you with questions trying to get to know you even more. Having the lingering doubt he had from rejection and negativity was lifted-off from him. He even mentioned having your first date so soon-

❀ He couldn't wait to bring the news to his team and friends.

❀ He can't wait to see you by his side every day.

≫ ──── ≪ Confession Aftermath ≫ ──── ≪

❀ After the confession, Bokuto would rarely ever leave your side. So he does get clingy to you as he does with Akaashi. He's not much for PDA but he's also not against the thought, he unconsciously hugs you, wrapping his arms around your torso, waist, arms, and sometimes around your neck at least- Sometimes light kisses and pecks but those are generally rare unless he's really excited about something.

❀ He gets really flustered sometimes when you addressed him as your boyfriend the first few days and maybe weeks after starting the relationship. He's just not used to it- It gives this hunk of a man butterflies in his stomach a lot.

❀ Whenever you guys had to leave each other for your designated classes, you tend to find cute notes in your locker whenever you open them. Having cute phrases, flirts, compliments, and silly pick-up lines. You already knew it was from Bokuto because you... sometimes catch him lurking around your locker- just never brought up to him knowing it would genuinely make him sad.

❀ Bokuto just finds it cool that you don't know at first okay-

❀ You always tried to go to his practices and even games when you guys were just friends. Knowing that if Bokuto saw any of his friends out in the stands made his confidence skyrocket so much-

❀ But since you guys are now in a relationship, it makes Bokuto smile so much every time he spots you in the stands of the crowds. Cheering him on boosts his confidence so fucking much- like if this man is in emo mode please cheer for him, it helps a ton (Akaashi and the team might thank you also-)

❀ Long-lasting phone calls that continue till like 3-4 am. Sometimes facetime/video calls if you both have the ability to! He loves seeing your face, he finds it so fucking adorable with all your smallest features and details.

❀ Bokuto probably changed your contact name on his phone to something like "baby owl" with like emojis or something- or literally, just nick (pet) names he has for you- "baby, bae, cloud, cutie, feather, angel, king/queen, prince/princess" and so on. He looooves having names for you because it makes him smile every time he finds things that remind him of you (which generally is how he figures some of them out-)

❀ Whenever this man finds you sad, upset, stressed, or literally in any negative emotion. He will try his damn hardest to make you feel better even if its the slightest, and if it is the slightest he'll keep going to you are perfectly fine and dandy.

❀ He'll even go out of his way to skip practice if needed to comfort your sad butt- He'll give you cuddles, so many cuddles. He's practically a cuddle monster so better prepare for how long you'll stay in his arms afterward-

❀ Whenever you guys are just cuddling in general, he loves to nuzzle his face into your hair, your neck, and shoulder. Just craving the touch and comfort of his lover. Even if it's the slightest of motion, he'll take whatever he can get!

❀ Continuing on the cuddling situation, one of the secret things he loves about you is how you smell. The shampoo you use for your hair, the body wash, perfume or cologne.

❀ Since it's fall season (as of I'm writing this ofc-), Bokuto will drag you around for some walks in the cool weather through parks. Honestly hoping to find leaves to pile and fall into with you! I'd think one of Bo's love language would be quality time (and words of affirmation.) So hanging out with him makes this owl the happiest man to walk on this planet.

❀ Whenever you are cold on these walks, he won't hesitate to wrap his arms around you. If it's a specific part of your body that is cold, for example, your hands. He'll definitely hold his hands over yours. Maybe planting a kiss on them afterward (accidentally getting flustered seconds later-)

❀ Bokuto might also just stare at your hands clasped together, noticing the size difference for the 100000000000000th time

❀ Honestly, he likes to use Instagram and Snapchat filters with you. It's really cute af,, he's such a dork for couple things

❀ Body issues? Bokuto will love every part of you no matter what, comforting that every part of your body is perfect as it is. He'll softly plant kisses wherever you feel insecure. He'll cuddle you till you agree with him that you are a perfect human being.

❀ Don't try to sneak out of it. He's hella stubborn with topics like these- He ain't that dense and dumb guys,,

A/N: I love me some Bokuto huuuuu

#at-dusk;- 🌆#folder 📁;- 𝙷𝚊𝚒𝚔𝚢𝚞𝚞 #bokuto x reader #bokuto x male reader #bokuto x gender neutral reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x male reader #haikyuu x gender neutral reader #x reader #x male reader #bokuto imagine #bokuto headcanons #bokuto koutarou #soft headcanons #fluff headcanons #confession headcanons

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harryhooksgazebos267 · 4 years

Text

Broken Trust~ Part 12

A/N: Oh my god look who’s back lol....let it be known I wrote this at 4 am and I’m so tired so sorry for an errors lol. Paring: Bang Chan x reader; Mark Tuan x reader(arranged marriage)

Genre: Mafia au, angst, little bit of everything honestly

Warnings: Cursing, mafia life shizzle...this part gets a little steamy but there isn’t any smut cause I’m a child of god 😌

MASTERLIST

“Please tell me you’re messing with us,” Jisoo said with a look of disgust on her face.

“Truth hurts sometimes,” you said with a shrug as you pushed Jennie a little so you had room to sit down.

“Don’t touch me you heathen,” Jennie hisses out, mirroring Jisoo’s disgusted face.

“You idiot what were you thinking? How do you think Chan is gonna react when he finds out?” Jisoo scolded.

“You cannot tell him!” You said as your eyes grew wide.

“Why can’t you tell him? It’s not like he has any right to feel any type of way,” Seulgi said with a shrug.

“But still, Marks our enemy,” Jennie said with an eye roll.

“I don’t see how we came to that conclusion,” Irene stated with an icy glare.

“What do you mean “how we came to that conclusion”?? Stray Kids told us-“ Jisoo started only to be cut off.

“Exactly! You got your information from Stray Kids! The eight assholes who faked their own deaths and are trying to bring down the JYP empire. How stupid are you to actually believe a word they say! And you y/n, I can’t believe you kissed him. Since when are the two of you close enough where kissing is apart of your relationship,” she rants, her face growing red in anger.

You start thinking back to what Chan had told you in the club. About Irene being in love with Mark. You didn’t want to believe him but it lowkey made sense.

“Irene why are you so quick to blindly follow JYP? You aren’t even apart of their mafia,” Jisoo questioned as she shook her head.

“It’s because she’s in love with him,” you state with a sigh.

“She’s in love with Mr. Jinyoung? Nasty,” Seulgi said as she shuttered at the thought.

“What? No sorry I meant Mark.”

“I’m not in love with Mark. And even if I was it’s none of your business y/n.”

“It’s none of my business? Are you serious right now?”

“Wait Irene do you actually love him? Is that why you don’t believe Stray Kids?” Jennie questioned.

“I am not in love with Mark! I just think he’s more trust worthy then those lying scum bags who are trying to ruin everything that we’ve built!”

“Lying scum bags? Irene stop being delusional! They aren’t the ones who are lying and you know it. They aren’t threatening SM at all so how are they ruining anything that we’ve built?”

You couldn’t believe the words coming out of her mouth.

“I’m not having this conversation, I have more important matters to attend to. Jennie, Jisoo, it was good seeing you. I wish I could say the same for you y/n.”

And with that, Irene was gone with a conflicted Seulgi trailing after her.

“We gotta leave and we gotta leave now,” you say as you begin packing some belongings.

“What why?” Jennie asked as she observed you as you frantically shoved shit in your bag.

“Because Irene is so snitching to Mark and I ain’t trying to die. I’m too young and hot for that.”

“Fair point, are you gonna go back go to the stray kids base?” Jennie asked as she stood up, stretching her limbs.

“Yeah, but if anyone asks we’re having a sleepover. I think it’s time we take plan awaken to the next step. I’m starting to feel anxious, too many people know about the plan and it’s just a matter of time before the full truth comes to light. JB is already suspicious and Mark is having doubts. I lied to him earlier but I’m not sure how much longer he’ll believe me.”

After quickly packing your things, Jisoo, Jennie, and you quickly make your way downstairs only to be stopped by Jaebum.

“Going somewhere?” He questioned with an eye brow raised as he took a bite out of the red apple he was eating.

“Yeah I’m gonna go over to the girls for a little,” you state.

“For how long?”

“Ummm I don’t know, a day or two. Maybe longer, I haven’t really been able to have a lot of girl time with them,” you lie with a little laugh.

“Does Mark know?”

“Does he need to know?”

“I don’t know, you tell me.”

“Do you ever stop with the questions,” Jisoo sassed.

“Well I just want to make sure our little y/n here is safe,” he said with a fake smile.

“She will be now if you’ll excuse us,” Jennie said while pushing you out the door, throwing JB a glare.

Once in the KIA, you give Chan a call. He answers almost immediately.

“Is something wrong? Are you hurt?”

“I’m okay but I’m on my way over. I think it’s time we move forward with the plan. I think you were right about Irene having feelings for Mark and I’m worried she might tell him.”

“What made you think that? Did something happen.”

“Ummm well.....”

You lowkey began to panic, not knowing if you should tell Chan about the kiss.

“Y/n?”

“Hum yeah?”

“Babygirl what happened? You have me a little worried.”

“Listen we’ll talk when I get there okay?”

“Okay. Be careful, I’ll inform the boys you’re on your way.”

“Okay, see you soon.”

And with that, the call was over. It didn’t take too long for you to get to their base. Or maybe you were so wrapped up in your thoughts that the drive seemed short. Once you arrived, you quickly entered their mansion and were bombarded with questions for the 8 man children that stood in front of you.

“Will you all calm down,” you laughed out at you shooed them all away.

“Okay okay but tell us what’s going on,” Jisung urged as he looked at you with wide eyes.

With slight hesitation, you glance at Jennie and Jisoo who both gave you a nod and a slight smile. Encouraging you to continue.

With a sigh you explain the entire cafe situation and how Mark told you his suspicions. You continued on with how he drove you to the secluded place and how you told him some truth and some lies. You paused slightly as you thought about the kiss.

“What is it? What happened next?” Felix questioned as he leaned forward.

“Well....ummm the thing is....he might have maybe idk ᵏⁱˢˢᵉᵈ ᵐᵉ but I can’t be too sure.”

The room fell silent.

“I’m sorry but he might have kissed you but you can’t be too sure? Are you fucking kidding me?” Chan scoffed as his face twisted in anger.

“That’s disgusting y/n,” Minho stated while looking appalled.

There are more answers of agreement but you rolled your eyes and continued.

“Anyway, when I came home and told Irene, Seulgi, Jisoo, and Jennie, Irene got really pissed and basically said that we were dumb for trusting you. She seemed more worried about Mark and JYP then she was about any of us.”

“Oh she’s so gonna snitch,” Hyunjin commented with a shake of his head.

“Also, as we were leaving Jaebum kept asking us a lot of questions,” Jisoo pipped in.

“Fucking Jaebum all up in our business,” Changbin stated with an eye roll.

“Well it’s a good thing you came here y/n. As for now, we won’t do anything. We can talk more about it tomorrow. There’s a lot I need to think about before we move forward,” Chan said as he clenched his fist, looking pissed off.

“Hey are you guys gonna stay too?” Seungmin asked as he looked at Jisoo and Jennie.

“We’ll probably stay for a bit but not for the entire night,” Jennie said.

Soon the room broke off into a bunch of little conversations. You currently were talking to Seungmin and jeongin about life in general when you glanced over to look at Chan who stood to the side of the room with an unreadable look on his face. Excusing yourself from the conversation, you made your way over to him.

“Hey are you alright?” You ask softly as you place your hand on his shoulder.

Chan glances down at your hand before a small sigh left his lips.

“Come on, let’s talk,” he stated as he softly grabbed your hand and lead you out of the room.

After a couple of twist and turns, you make it into what you presume to be Chan’s room. Letting go of your hand Chan begins to pace the room as you take a seat on his bed.

“Chan?” You call out softly, a little worried.

Nothing.

“Chan,” you call out with a little more power.

Suddenly Chan stops and approaches you quickly. In the flash of an eye Chan is cupping your checks with his lips on yours. It only took you a moment to get over the initial moment of shock before you begin to kiss him back. Your hands gripping his broad shoulders. After a few seconds, he pushes you back onto the bed slightly while moving his hands on to your arms, raising them above your head. Your lungs felt like they were going to collapse any second as your heart rate increased. The kiss was fiery and filled with need. You practically could feel the jealousy and anger radiating off of Chan. You couldn’t believe you forgot how good it felt to have his lips and hands on you. Yet it was over just as quickly as it had started. Panting as he pulled away, Chan quickly stood up.

“I’m sorry I.....” he trailed off while avoiding your eyes.

“What? You have no reason to be sorry,” you chuckle lightly as you try to catch your breath.

“I really don’t know what came over me, it was just the idea of Marks hands and lips on your body....it makes me so mad to think about,” he said while shaking his head.

“Y/n, I need to know that you don’t love him. I need to know that if there ever came a time where you had to pick between the two of us, there wouldn’t be any hesitation and you would pick me.”

“Chan,” you sigh out as you stand up and make your way towards him.

“No one forced me to fall in love with you, no one forced me to say yes when you asked me to marry you. With Mark, it’s a totally different story. I would be lying if I said that a part of me didn’t care for him because I do but not in the same way that I care for you. It doesn’t matter how long we’ve been apart, it hasn’t changed how I feel about you. No amount of time apart could make me stop loving you and I want no, I need you to know that.”

Chan gives you a cute little smile as he pulls you into a hug. The two of you stay in each other’s arms for what feels like a lifetime.

“I’m sorry for leaving you,” Chan says all of a sudden as he pulls aways and strokes your check lightly.

“It’s okay, you did what you had to do,” you tell him with a small smile.

“Still, I should have trusted you and I didn’t. I regret that so much and I just want you to know that.”

“Honestly I probably wouldn’t have trusted me if I was you, I don’t blame you,” you tell him sincerely.

Chan pulls you in for another kiss, this one being softer and filled with all the love that Chan felt for you. Your moment is cut short as you hear a loud bang come from downstairs.

“I swear to god if it’s Jisung and Hyunjin fighting I’m going to end both of them,” Chan growls out as he pulls away from you causing you to laugh.

For the first time since Chan had left, you felt as if you were whole. You felt as though you were finally home. Because that’s what Chan was for you, he was your home. And you would be damned if you let someone take that away from you again. JYP had another thing coming to him if he thought that you all would go down without a fight.

TAG LIST (feel free to send me an ask if you would like to be added to the tag list or if you would like me to send a private message every time I update <3): @elenaramos1 @yup-indecisive-girl-cece @ewok7attack @0leelina0 @letterstoskz @lilacyeonjun @leesalts

Part 13

MASTERLIST

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smalltragedy · 3 years

Text

* justice smith, demi man + he/they | you know gabriel de leon, right? they’re twenty three, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, six years? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to 1984 (infinite jest) by the used like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole waking up in a body as heavy as the dead, emotions always on the verge of spilling over - you laugh before the punch lands, the belief that every encounter you have will be the last thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is october 31st, so they’re a scorpio, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( james, 21, est, they/them )

hi im just reposting gabe’s intro bc its been a very long time n im starting a little fresh hehe. yes i do regret the text color bt im not going back.

VIOLENCE TW

mini playlist.

ghosting ;; mother mother / roam the room ;; citizen / art of doubt ;; metric / thnks fr th mmrs ;; fall out boy / heart in a cage ;; the strokes / where is my mind? ;; the pixies / flowers grow out of my grave ;; dead man’s bones / 1984 (infinite jest) ;; the used / blister in the sun ;; the violent femmes.

statistics.

full name: gabriel de leon.

nickname(s): gabe.

birthday: october 31st, 1997.

zodiac: scorpio sun, scorpio moon, gemini ascending.

label: the icarian.

hometown: belleville, new jersey.

sexuality: bisexual (masc-leaning).

pinterest.

biography.

it’s only rly ever been gabe n his mom n the little new jersey suburbs that r always the same no matter where they go. they dn’t speak abt fathers or brothers or spain or anywhere other than the now, and how its constantly changing bt oddly the same.

his mom’s name is sonia n we love her. she worked a lot as a single mom n p much hs done everything on her own ever since leaving spain.

they dn’t talk abt spain bt we cn talk abt spain n hw sonia hd grown up partially there n partially in the states n hw she’d originally planned to live there forever bt the man she’d fallen in love with ws involved in some. high class dangerous shit n it ws safer fr them to part even if tht involved leaving everything she knew n loved <3

bt its like. ok. bc she hd gabe <3 n they dnt talk abt it so it practically nvr happened. n she tries her best as a mom n usually tht is enough.

they moved around a lot just bc sonia is a very. flighty person. anxious bt nvr seems tht way is just always. tense. gabe didnt think she ws capable of relaxing fr. a rly long time.

she wld commute 2 nyc every morning n after school gabe wld climb onto the train n by the time he got 2 her place of work she’d be just getting off n they’d get a slice of pizza n sometimes they’d go somewhere like central park or coney island (just fr the novelty) bt most of the time they just got back on the train home w/ gabe either doing homework or napping on her shoulder.

when gabe got a little older he’d sometimes skip school n take the train after sonia had already gone so he cld spend the day in nyc. he liked learning bt didnt rly like school. he nvr properly fit in bc of the amt of times they’d move so it felt like nowhere ws. right fr him.

got rly involved in. the punk scene as a young unsupervised teenager n tht led 2 a lot of like. shitty stick n pokes bt also a love of. very loud angry music n a sense of justice tht he held tightly in his fists. got mouthy towards bullies whether at school or in the scenes he involved himself in n started getting into a lot of fights bc of it.

during this, sonia ended up dating n marrying gabe’s stepdad who he calls craig sometimes bt i dnt think thats his name i wont lie to u guys. its partially a joke n partially purposeful disrespect bc gabriel does not trust a single man bt like. man. ‘craig’ is just an accountant. he’s fine he’s a good dude. they once bonded over like. the mets.

violence tw // anyways. when gabriel ws 16 he got into a super super bad fight tht ended rly. terribly n like listen. nobody died bt it ws just. it got blown up very out of proportion n gabe might’ve gotten expelled even tho he wsnt even the one who started it bt thts okay. ‘craig’, or paul, suggested tht maybe. a change of scenery wld b good fr gabe n b4 they knew it they were. moving to paul-robert’s hometown of irving, north carolina. violence end of tw //

he wld’ve complained more bt. fr sonia’s sake gabe kept it 2 himself. it made her happy 2 see them all get along anyways n like. idk he cld put forth tht little effort <3

bt honestly like. he didnt rly get into too many fights once they moved down here n even tho sometimes he ws like. ommgg. i hate this town .. its so washed up .. he still made friends n like. the only thing tht changed ws tht it ws a lil harder fr him 2 acquire illegal substances.

anyways. currently he hs a tattoo apprenticeship n is a professional piercer n like. he plays guitar n writes songs bt thts more of a hobby rn than anything else. mostly focused on paying his rent at port apartments bc as much as he. loves his mom he does not want 2 live with her forever <3 n thts okay!

personality & facts.

overall xtremely passionate person like god. feels emotions so intensely. every time he opens his mouth n talks abt an interest of theirs its just very like. u listen n ur like oh. gained 2 inspiration. thanks.

clings onto his friends p tightly bc he like. nvr rly stayed in one place fr super super long in new jersey so he nvr made very long term friends n now hes like. very clingy HLKDSHLKFSHLKDG also hates to b alone. subtle desperation behind interactions with ppl he rly wld like to be friends with.

like dnt get me wrong hes gotten into. sm fights bt thts mostly bc he cannot keep his mouth shut n he also cnt stand douchebags he like. always wants to tear them down prob bc he ws a victim of bullying. n u know what. we support him. otherwise he loves ppl bt esp if they hv similar interests 2 him.

like golden retriever who bites kind of. intensely loyal but at the same time is very skeptical. things tht good things do not last very long even though they’ve been doing already fr the last few years.

also bit of a nerd. they were nvr rly a big fan of school bt theres smth abt a good superhero comic tht draws their attention more than like. any english class evr. bt seven soldiers of victory? classic. big dc fan.

uh. very into like. hardcore music. hardcore rock. punk. if its loud n angry they r into it like so so much. hs sm tattoos is like. super covered in them its partially bc they work at a tattoo shop n partially bc they do not know hw to manage their money well.

ooohh u know what theyre. kinda moody i wont lie to u. very defensive like they dnt evr wna talk abt their past. has experienced Things n they do not wish to discuss them. will usually like. deflect frm conversations he doesnt wna hv.

in tune with nature. loves fkn taking walks. hangs out in the woods by abernathy creek n lilac ridge bc nobody rly goes there n its just. nice

tries not 2 take anything super seriously 2 the point where when he does take smth seriously its a little scary bc theyre super intense abt it. forcibly optimistic even tho on the inside he feels like a total pessimist. lots of. deep down insecurities tht he projects by attaching himself p firmly onto others. >.>

so so so energetic. can never stay still. always hs to be moving around. restless like tht. probably got it frm his mom. overly protective over the ppl he loves. probably got it frm his mom as well.

goes onto Tangents bt also divert frm those tangents n is generally all over the place.

always cold n always looks tired n like he hsnt slept in a thousand years n u know what. sometimes he just does not sleep.

oooohh theyre a vegan. totally into animal rights. devious little demi man beyond that .. loves horror n the paranormal n believes in like. every cryptic. will debate u on it.

erm not. the kindest 2 themself theyre a bit self destructive. impulsive. drives very fast n parties super hard. said i will hv my effy stonem moment. u dont hv to gabe.

bt ya! luvs oranges n reds n is maybe a short king. hs an eyebrow piercing n like. a lip ring i wont fk around here he IS living his best emo life in 2021. a little outdated on the trends bt thats okay. probably will tell u hes frm new jersey. its a personality trait. smokes the shittiest cigarettes ever.

wanted plots.

just ghosting along ,, dnt even exist 2 me ,, ;; god. firstly just the vast amt of ppl tht gabe hs like. spoken to romantically n then dropped suddenly. n then maybe like. one tht actually Hurt bt they cnt avoid each other bt theyre actively pretending each other doesnt exist n its. hurtful bc it ws like. actually smth nice bt <3 ykno FKLFSDHG

hey hey heyy c’maahn i’m just a little guy ;; n this is the vast amt of ppl tht gabe hs probably. pissed off n hs either fought or been on the verge of fighting just. unable 2 resist a good bicker-turned-duel.

just blistering in the sun ;; they cld b close friends bt also they cld also not b bt just ppl who. indulge in bad impulsive decisions with gabe. general bad influences on each other’s health n just. no good! party hard bt at what cost.

n also ;; like ... rly solid good friendships ... flings n maybe an exe or two tht either ended on good terms or just. horrendous, ppl they’ve distanced frm, ppl also frm up north, piercing customers, bt not tattoo customers bc im p sure they’d get fired if they were just tattoo’ing ppl willy nilly, etc.

#irvingintro #violence tw #(more of a brief mention)#bt still #jst reposting bc its been so long JFGDHFDSGSLFKG

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missnctyukhei · 5 years

Text

hopeless - 66 hours

Pairing: idol!Jaehyun x makeupartist!reader

Genre: smut, fluff and also angst

Warnings: swearing, a lot of explicit smut (unprotected sex, dirty talk, rough sex, cunnilingus, fellatio,…)

Word count: 14,6k

a/n: I don’t know why, but the story suddenly flashed into me. I could hardly stop writing. I was thinking to make maybe a series out of it and I also thought to write a Jaehyun POV. But let's see how it develops. Would be very happy if you tell me how you liked the story.

Inspired by this song

_______________________________________________________________________

"A-ah" A soft moan escaped you as you feel the pressure on the sensitive pearl of your femininity. You feel his lips on your neck, his left hand on your ass. With your hips, you grind against his bump.

It was dark in the hotel room, because you didn’t turned on the light. Only the brightness of the billboards of the city appeared. Shadows settled over your body, but you could see his brown eyes when in a brief moment your views met. He released his hand from your clit to pull his boxers down a bit and put his dick out. You feel his dry skin against your moist folds touching. With his tip he rubbed your clit again and with a deep breath you lean back a bit while your hands still clasped his shoulders. He teased you over and over again, coming with his tip again and again closer to your entrance, but he never penetrated you.

It was intense. It was passionate. It was Jaehyun.

„Beep…beep…beep…beep…beep…“

You open your eyes shocked and couldn’t realize in the first second, where you have just been. You turn off the alarm and turn to the side. Jiho, your co-worker, was lying next to you. She always woke up before the alarm rang and so she was scrolling over the screen of her iPhone. At this moment you come back to yourself and at the same time a deep pain spreads inside you.

It was all just a dream, snatched from the pieces of your memory. Jaehyun wasn’t there. He hadn’t been there in a long time and it still hurt terribly. This emotional pain, the thought that he is no longer with you, feels so physical. Like a knife would pierce your chest. And again and again you have to experience it.

You stare at the ceiling of your hotel room. Your heart was still throbbing like crazy. You wanted to stay in this dream. You didn’t want to go back to reality, into a world without Jaehyun at your side. You feel tears gather in your eyelids. But you didn’t want to cry in front of Jiho. So you decide to lay in the bed a little longer and try to let the first pain go by. It took a while, because over and over again the pictures of your dream, mixed with those of your memories, appear before you. The stitches in your chest go away after the time, but the general pain was a constant companion.

You just couldn’t get over Jung Jaehyun.

As long as you work here and you constantly see him, you couldn’t live your simple and normal life. It was clear to you that you couldn’t go on like this.

An annoyed sigh awakened you from your thoughts. Jiho got up and organized her clothes.

"I just don’t understand why everyone is freaking out because of this day." She tied her hair into a bun and started to put on her clothes.

"Taeil's sleeve is suddenly too long and Mark can’t find his bow tie, but no one should wear a bow tie! Ahhhh ... Yesterday was everything fine.“

Jiho was the lead stylist of NCT 127. She was incredibly talented, creative and she could combine incredible colors and shapes. But she was very modest, wearing only black. Since you started working at SM Entertainment, you got along well with her from the start, even though you didn’t work together at the beginning. At first, you were only responsible for NCT Dream, you were one of many make-up stylists. Jiho was the person who stood up for you and got the bosses to promote you to NCT 127's main makeup artist. She swears to this day that she didn’t do that out of friendship and said it was a pure professional decision. Maybe she wasn’t completely honest, but you never questioned it.

"Only once I would like to enjoy a hotel breakfast in peace."She sighs heavily again while putting her BB cream and mascara on her face. Actually, she was told that she had the morning off. But as always, something had to be reworked. Everyone was stressed in the last few days. SM Entertainment has managed to conclude a contract with Capitol Records. NCT 127 was invited to an event where stars like Katy Perry also appeared. Everything had to be perfect and everyone worked beyond their hours.

"Should I bring you something?" You turn to the side, because you weren’t ready to get up yet. Beside her, you had the morning off.

"No, that should do fucking Kibum, who stole my free morning."

Kibum was one of the two main managers of NCT 127 and he took everything very seriously. He was a terrible perfectionist and often made the whole team work more than it needed to be. Jiho and Kibum had a very special relationship. Most of the time they hated each other, but then they made it to sleep with each other again and again. Maybe it was just a way to deal with their anger. It will probably never be understandable.

"What are you going to do this morning?" Jiho turns to you and closes her mascara again.

"I don’t know, I think I'll go for a walk and maybe I'll find a nice cafe to collect my thoughts." Your gaze went out the window and suddenly your eyes became glassy again. You sit up and try to hide your sadness as much as possible.

"You will tell him today?" Jiho didn’t move and looked over at you anxious. You try to swallow the pain and turn back to her and nodding. For a while she kept looking at you worriedly. She sighed and when she wanted to say something, her phone started to ring.

"Shit it's Kibum! I gotta go! We'll talk in the evening." She puts the mascara aside, grab her bag and start running.

As the door closed, loneliness suddenly hit you like a strike. The silence made your pulse rise again and you didn’t want to be alone with your thoughts for a second. You turn on your playlist as fast as possible. It wasn’t a normal playlist because in this list where songs which you didn’t associate with Jaehyun. You loved listening to music with him, and in the time you were a couple, you shared a lot of songs with each other. So it wasn’t easy for you after your breakup to hear music again. Almost every one of your favorite artists made your heart broken. In the beginning you only heard podcasts, but over time you found new styles of music and artists that you havn’t shared with Jaehyun yet. The music brought you down and you could now start your day slowly. You took a shower, put on make-up and styled your hair. Especially today it was important to you to look good. That's why it took more time than actually thought. But you didn’t mind because it relaxed you a bit.

But your caffeine addiction slowly pushed you out of the hotel. Since the tour of America was over, you didn’t like the hotel breakfast anymore. If time allowed, you always tried to explore the local bakery. In rare cases, when Jaehyun had the morning off too, you always ordered breakfast in the hotel room. But lately a simple coffee was enough for you, maybe even a Croissant. But today you didn’t feel like eating. You were too nervous, because you knew exactly what you had to expect today. And actually, you just wanted to get out of the hotel so you couldn’t meet anyone. Instead of the lift you took the stairs, you try to bypass the rooms of your co-workers. You only had to go through the lobby and pray that no one stops you. When you entered the hall, you couldn’t see anyone from your company, but as you walked past the reception desk, you saw Jaehyun, Johnny and Mark standing with their manager.

Your legs suddenly became heavy and you were unable to leave the lobby faster. Jaehyun's eyes hit you and a cold shiver ran down your spine. For a few seconds you stare at him, but you try to get yourself back to reality. Your heart was pounding like crazy again and you can feel his eyes following you. You breathe heavily and try to get out of the hotel as fast as possible. You need to confront him early enough anyway.

It didn’t take long before you found a cute little cafe near the hotel. You order your classic coffee variation: a double espresso with a shot of oatmilk. Then you sit down to a window and watched the hustle of the city. Soon your thoughts drift off to Jaehyun again. It had been over 4 months since he left you. You still couldn’t understand how this could happen. One day you were happy and suddenly he didn’t want to be with you anymore.

"I think it's better if we break up, otherwise we'll both lose our job." He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. He didn’t dare to look at you. But you couldn’t believe what he just said.

"Where does this come from?" The first tear rolled over your cheek, but actually you didn’t want to show yourself so weak. You wonder about yourself that you could answer him. The shock was deep and most of the time you didn’t have words in situations like this. But you couldn’t quite believe him. Was this real?

"I think about us ..." He looked up at you carefully, but you can’t understand anything of this. It almost felt like he was speaking another language.

"We worked so hard for it, we shouldn't destroy that." It was so ridiculous what he said, so you even had to laugh contemptuously.

„Don't talk about me, if you only mean yourself." More tears rolled down your face because you couldn’t control your emotions anymore.

„We've come this far with NCT 127. Soon we'll be known around the world - if I have a relationship, then they'll kick me out. And after all, according to my contract, I have a dating ban." He tries to take your hand, but you pull it away immediately. Your whole body hurts, even every breath was hurting. The whole situation was so unimaginable for you.

"That didn’t bother you the last 8 months either." You shake your head, hoping that it could only be a dream. But it was real. Every word that Jaehyun said was true.

"Can I clear that up?" The barista suddenly stood in front of you with a tablet and pointed to your empty cup. You nod dizzy and straighten yourself again. You were so far away from reality with your thoughts that you had to recollect yourself. You look at your phone first and you see that time has passed by in flight. It was time to return to the hotel to start your work again.

Back at work you went quickly through the to-do-list with you staff.

"Should I work with Jaehyun again?" Minna, one of the makeup artist, asked. Lately you've always assigned Jaehyun to her. You wanted to see him as little as possible and you didn’t wanted to be with him in a room alone.

"No, I'm first at Taeyong and then at Jaehyun. Don’t forget that everyone has to finish their work at 3pm." There is a brief murmur and everyone went into the room that was assigned to them.

First, Taeyong came to you. You like to work with him together, because it was always super relaxed. He always had his AirPods inside and didn’t say much. It was always easy and pleasant with him. The hardest part for you was always Mark, because the poor boy fell a lot asleep from exhaustion. But his face had to be often tense during make-up to achieve the best result. But in general, you liked all very much. You only sometimes miss Renjun the most. He was the kindest of the Dreamies and you liked him the most of all idols in this company. You knew he was going through a lot lately and it hurt you that you couldn’t be with him. You had a good relationship and sometimes you talk to each other on the phone. He was like a little brother, or sometimes even like a son to you.

After you finished Taeyongs makeup, he thanked you and left the room. You clean your brushes and fix everything when you hear the door buckle being pulled down. Your pulse got higher and you check your appearance in the mirror again. The door opened and Jaehyun stepped inside. You turn to him and your eyes met. He looked surprised, but closed the door.

"Hi." His voice was gentle and calm. It was like balm for your soul. You smiled and for a few seconds it was like you never broke up. He sits down on the chair and you stand in front of him. His eyes looked up at you and the corners of his mouth went up. You stroke his hair and for a short moment he closed his eyes and enjoyed the moment.

"The black hair suits you well." It was the first sentence that has been spoken between you two for a long time. Jaehyun opened his eyes and he smiled.

"Thank you."

You release your hand from his hair to stop destroying it more, then you dedicate yourself to his make-up. Jaehyun took his AirPods out of his bag and handed you one.

"Do you like?" You hesitate for a moment. So many memories are attached to it. You had to keep your relationship secret from the public, but also from most of your company too. Nevertheless, you wanted to communicate as much as possible without attracting attention. So if you waited at the airport, took the bus or just stand somewhere random, he always shared his AirPods with you. In these months of your relationship, you shared a lot of music with each other. By every occasion he has shown you songs and you him too. While you are listening to music, you have always written messengers on your phone with each other even when you sit side by side. But it was your thing and nobody could take that from you.

You decide, after some hesitation, to take one part of the AirPod and put it in your right ear. Jaehyun smiled happy and started searching something from his playlist. The song he chose surprised you. It was one of the first songs you showed him. He played Body Language by Kali Uchis. It was an artist he didn’t know first and he started liking her music because of you. Accompanied by the music in your ear, you start your workflow and draw your best work on Jaehyun's face. You didn’t know exactly what you do differently, but you were so inspired that you did a very good job. Maybe it was his new black hair, maybe it was just the good feeling that he gave you.

When you were done, he looked in the mirror and was surprised from his reflection. You smile contentedly as he checks his makeup and beamed with happiness.

"Wow, sometimes I think you can do magic." You smile modestly at his compliment, but lower immediately his head. You couldn’t look at him anymore, because suddenly the longing for him increased so much that you can hardly stand it anymore.

"Maybe you should go. I think Kibum's already waiting." You became serious and look at the clock. You take a deep breath and try to stop looking at Jaehyun. He was completely frozen by your sudden change of mood. He could barely react and he just followed your instructions. When he went to the door, you suddenly turn to him.

"Wait, I have to tell you something." You stay on the other side of the room and play nervously with your fingers. Jaehyun stopped and turned curiously back to you.

"I got an offer from YG Entertainment to work as a make-up artist for them, they pay me exactly the same salary as here. They want my answer at 9am on Monday."

Jaehyun's eyes suddenly grew wide because he could hardly believe what he was hearing. He was frozen and you felt that you had to say something more.

"Jaehyun ... I can’t live like this anymore. Every time I see you, my heart breaks again." Tears were collecting in your lower eyelids, but you try to explain the situation as understandable as possible.

"I just can’t get over you. That's why I have to go." You breathe deeply, because finally were your words pronounced. It was quiet between you two for a while. Jaehyun still looked at you wide-eyed, he was completely frozen. And then he opened his mouth. You look at him expectantly and hope for words that would make you feel good. But before Jaehyun can only utter one sentence, Kibum came suddenly into the room.

"Jaehyun we have to go." He looked clearly stressed and he grabbed Jaehyun by the wrist to pull him out. One last look met you again and you watch him as he leaves the room.

Only you stayed behind and you didn’t know if the unspoken words of Jaehyun would eventually be pronounced.

66 hours till the decision

Your knees were suddenly weak and the only thing you could do is to sit down. The pain is spreading in your chest again and you are starting to breathe loudly. It was now real, there was no turning back. You told it Jaehyun and soon you will not see him anymore. The thought scared you and your body start to trembling. It felt like someone was lacing an invisible strung around your throat. Tears rolled down your cheeks, one after the other. How could only a simple heartache hurt you so much physically? It felt like you were dying.

You look in the mirror and don’t recognize yourself again. When did you become like this? What did Jaehyun do to you? You just wanted to do your dream job and now all you wanted was him. And now there was no turning back, you had to let him go. You have already gone through many hurdles in your life, but that was definitely the hardest part for you. You take a tissue and dab off the running mascara. It didn’t matter anyway, you couldn’t change anything in this situation. In another universe, it could have worked between you and Jaehyun. But this was the real life and fate takes its course.

When your panic attack had calmed down, you could finally pack your things and go back to your hotel room. You had to pack your things, because as soon as the event was over, the flight get back to Seoul.

When the suitcases were packed, you still had plenty of time. But you didn’t want to be alone with your thoughts again. You clicked through the TV, but can’t find an interesting program. You look through the magazines that were in the room, but no article interested you. You try to distract yourself on the internet, but somehow nothing could spark your interest. When the FaceTime sign appeared on the right corner of your laptop and you see the name Renjun, you were incredibly happy. Immediately you click on accept.

"Hi my love, are you okay?" Many in the company criticized your relationship with Renjun, as most claim that you are mothering him too much and mean that isn’t good for him. But you had an incredible good connection to Renjun right from the start. He is for you like the little brother you always wanted. But also Renjun felt this connection and trusted you quickly.

„Everything is all right, we just have to train a lot for our comeback." In the background, you could tell he was in the training room. He had become thinner and that worried you.

"I'm really looking forward to the song, it will be great." You smile and try to encourage him at the same time.

"Yes, I can show you something next time, if we see each other." His eyes shone suddenly and you were glad that he had a phase of bliss.

"Will you come over at noon on Sunday? I can cook you something and we can eat and talk." He clearly had to eat something. You already knew that all the idols in their comeback phase were always very thin, but nevertheless you are worried.

"Sunday sounds good, I have two hours for lunch.“ You talk about a few everyday events for a while and then you're ending the conversation. When you hang up, you feel sick in the stomach. Besides Jaehyun, it will be hard for you to talk to Renjun. You just hope he takes it up well and you could keep in touch with him.

"Y/N, we have to go." Jiho rushed into the room suddenly and she looked visibly stressed.

"The boys are already picked up and we have to go to the airport." She packs her things together and you two make your way to the hotel lobby.

48 hours till the decision

"Jaehyun looked really good at the event, you clearly did your best." Jiho winked at you and showed you the photos on the tablet, but you didn’t really want to look at it. So your gaze wanders short over the screen, then you look out the window again.

"It's bothering him," Jiho said suddenly, turning to face you. You didn’t want to talk further about the topic, it would hurt you anyway.

"He smiles and plays his role, but he's not really there, almost like a ghost." She hands you the tablet, because now she had managed to arouse your curiosity. You swipe through the pictures and videos. Actually, you found everything normal. But you stopped by one video. A singer came to them and talked to the group. He looked at Jaehyun and he smiled, but as his gaze turned away then immediately dropped the corners of his mouth. His face was serious again, almost melancholy. Could it really be? Did he really care so much about you leaving the company? Johnny and Taeyong seem happy and excited next to him, but Jaehyun stood beside them and just did his job.

No. That couldn’t be real. He didn’t want you in his life anymore, it wouldn’t matter to him theoretically.

You shake your head and hand Jiho the tablet again.

"It just an imagination, it doesn’t mean anything. Maybe he is tired.“

Jiho picked up the tablet and shrugged his shoulders.

„If you say so.“

You lean against the window again and look into the distance. The sun has risen and the light shines gently into the cabin. Soon the plane would land and you were glad to be back in your apartment.

One hour before the landing, you had to refresh with the others the make-up of the idols. When you have to do Marks make-up, he was sleeping again. Carefully, you wake him up.

"I'm very fast, I promise." You smile and Mark opens his eyes. You turn his face a little more to yours, so that in the end the symmetry fits. Most of the time Mark was sleepy, but this time it was different. His doe eyes were suddenly bigger than usual and he stared at you.

"Is it true?" He asked. You're just tapping the color with your brush, but you're not looking at him yet.

"Hmm?" You really had no plan what he meant, because you were completely focused on your work.

"Jaehyun has said that you will leave us." When Mark uttered the words, you look up in surprise. So he talked to him about it, you didn’t expect that.

"Oh ... yes, probably…on Monday I should announce my decision to those." A strand of hair fell in front of your face and you wipe it quickly and nervously aside. Actually, you didn’t want to talk about it anymore. But Mark just couldn’t stop staring at you in horror. You knew he wouldn’t stop. You sigh and put the makeup aside.

"Mark, you probably can guess why I'm leaving, but please don’t tell anyone, especially not Renjun. I have to do that myself." You breathe deeply and you know that as soon as you officially announce your termination, you have a lot to explain.

"Renjun will be really down." Mark's eyes relaxed and he looked almost sad.

"I know ... I know, but just because I change company doesn’t mean that I will not be there for you anymore, you can always come to me, okay?“ Mark nodded, but you knew he wasn’t happy with your answer.

For over 3 years now you have been working here and the Dreamies have grown really dear to you at this time. When you started working at SM Entertainment, you only had contact with them at the beginning. You are building a good relationship during this time and it will be hard for you to leave them too.

"But you come this evening?" Mark looked at you again with his wide doe eyes. You sigh, but don’t say anything. In the evening there was a dinner to celebrate the contract with Capitol Records. All employees, and of course NCT 127, were invited. But actually you didn’t mean to go. Mark noticed your hesitation and suddenly grabbed you by the sleeve like a small child would do by his mother.

"Please come, don't just leave." He wouldn't let your sleeve go until you gave him an answer. You simply couldn’t resist his faithful look and you yield.

"Okay, okay, but I will not stay for long.“

36 hours till the decision

You have decided to wear a daring dress for the evening. It was black, tight and asymmetrical. It only had a thicker straps left, that ran to your low neckline, then the dress went tight over your hips, down to your knees. On the right side of the lower part of the dress, was also a cut that went from your knee up to the top of your thigh. The dress showed a lot, but still had class. Jiho gave it to you, because she said, it would be the perfect dress for you. And she was right. You feel self-confident and somehow sexy too. Nothing could go wrong that evening.

With a lift you drive to the top floor and when the door opens, you were really surprised. You've got to hand it to SM, they knew how to party and they didn’t save money at this. The whole walls were glazed. In the middle of the large room stood a large table with lovingly decorated details. Fairy lights hung all over the ceiling and led to the outside, where there was standing a bar and some comfortable seats. In that moment you became a bit sentimental. All this you would leave behind, just for one man.

"Can I take your jacket?" One of the waiters waked you out of your dreams. You stammer something and hand him the jacket. However, your gaze wandered further through the penthouse. It all looked so incredible and you thought you were in a fairytale. Your fingers gripped the clutch and you dare to take a few steps further into the penthouse. There were already a few people here, but no one from the idols. You look through the faces and see Jiho. She was talking to Kibum right now and was visibly annoyed with him. She kept rolling her eyes and clapping her hand against her forehead. When she also discovered you, she breathed with relief and almost ran over to you.

"Finally you're here! And hello?! Why didn't I see the dress until now?" She looked at you and you reach over your hips uncertainly. Sometimes you felt like you had to pull in your stomach when people looked at your body.

"I thought for today it fits in well." You take a deep breath and look further into the room. You were still too tense because you really didn’t want to see Jaehyun. But another part inside you wanted him to see you in this dress. Sometimes you had to shake your head over your own train of thought. It was so confused and Jaehyun made you completely crazy. At this moment you will realize again, why you want to leave the company.

"Oh thats perfect! Drink it!" A waiter came over with a tablet of champagne and Jiho immediately took two glasses down to hand you one. You hadn’t eaten much that day since you had only slept since the flight, but you decide to drink anyway. When you take the first sip, you realize how the heat spread in you and gave you a good feeling. So you decide to drink the rest quickly, to bring your nerves down a bit.

As the last drop of the champagne dripped down your throat, you hear a murmur behind you. You knew exactly who was coming. But right now Miga, also a co-worker and organizer of the event, came to you and handed you two a box.

"Pull a number and you know where you sit!" She grins and opens the box. Jiho looked visibly annoyed by the idea.

"Do we have to do that? I'd rather sit next to Y/N."

"Come on, that's funny! Usually we always seat by the same people." Miga grinned and she was clearly motivated. But Jiho was still not thrilled. She sighed deeply and pulled out a small piece of paper.

"17. Don’t you dare, that I'm sitting next to that jerk of Kibum"

"Now you!" Miga almost pushed the box against your body. You look down and also draw a number.

"And what is your number?" Jiho tried to look over at you while you open the small paper.

"6", you say and close the note again. Somehow you didn’t feel very well at the game, but if Miga had imagined something, then everyone had to follow.

"Very good, you could already go to your seats. I just have to distribute the last numbers." Miga pulled the box back to herself and went to the other co-workers. Jiho drank fast her champagne and put the empty glass aside.

"I feel like I need more of these drinks!" You both weren’t happy about the idea, but you decide to take your seats, even if they were far apart.

The space right next to you has already been taken. It was one of the hairdressers talking to one of the choreographers and maybe flirting with him a bit. Mark and Haechan, who were discussing about some random stuff which you couldn’t follow, sat opposite you. They waved briefly to greet you and then they argued further. For a short time it was very awkward situation for you. You couldn’t talk to anyone. So you fold your hands, lean your chin on it and look over to Jiho. At that moment Kibum is sitting right next to her and you had to smile a little bit about this situation. The two will certainly not go home alone today. It was always like that. They couldn’t be without each other, but their pride was too great to ever admit their feelings.

And then you suddenly feel a hand on your back and when you turn around, you almost get frightened by his likeness.

"I think I'm sitting next to you. I'm number 5." He shows you his note and sits down on the empty space. Panic breaks out inside you. How could only of all the people he exactly take the place next to you? You watch him sit next to you. His hair was made, but he wore no make-up. He didn’t need it because his skin was incredibly perfect. Every time you were in the mask with him, you couldn’t believe how fine pores could be. He straightened his jacket, that he wore open. Underneath, he wore a dark, but patterned shirt. The first two buttons of his shirt were open. And as always, he wore the silver chain with a small pendant on it. You had to be careful that you wouldn't stare too much. After all, you didn’t want to appear sad or desperate. But you didn’t have the words to speak up and you couldn’t do anything but look at your empty plate.

"Did you had a good nap?" He looked at you and you weren’t sure if he wanted to start simple small talk or if he was worried.

"Yes, I was able to recover well and you?" You knew that Jaehyun was a light sleeper and always woke up because of small things, so it was usually difficult for him to recover sufficiently.

"More or less." His answer was surprisingly very short and almost a little negative. The situation was already so unpleasant for you anyway, so you just decide not to say anything else. At that moment - thank god - the waiter came and took your order. To make the situation more bearable, you order a gin tonic and hoped that the alcohol would numb your pain a little. Incidentally, even more champagne was served.

"You look incredibly good today."Jaehyun suddenly came a little closer and his voice was so quiet that only you could hear him.

"Thank you." You take a deep sip of the champagne and try to keep your composure. The next moment all calls were interrupted. There were a few speeches, thanked all sorts of people and the food was served. Jaehyun's touch and looks have been a constant companion and it drives you crazy. Every time his hand touched your shoulder, back or thigh, it hit you like a lightning strike. Your body felt completely charged and you didn’t know how to go through it any longer.

By now everyone was deep in conversation and Jaehyun was drinking his third glass of whiskey.

"This place somehow reminds me of our first kiss." You look at him with wide eyes. What did he want to achieve with it? Why does he now indulge in past memories that are no longer relevant?

"A little bit..." He was clearly right. Your first kiss with him was in a penthouse. You remembered that day well.

You have just been in Thailand to do some promotions. That day, you heard that your dad married your former best friend. You already knew that they had been having an affair for some time. But they didn’t tell you and - and that is even worse - didn’t invite you to the wedding. Your relationship with your father has never been good, but that was the peak of all emotions. You could hardly spend a second without crying that day.

For the evening, the company had rented a penthouse with an associated pool. You were responsible for the make-up for Taeyong, because a dance video was shot. You could barely hide a sob that evening. Taeyong was very overstrained with your emotions. Again and again he looked around in panic and asked "Is everything okay?". You always just nod and try to behave yourself. But it wasn’t easy to control you emotions on this day. You were feeling so bad emotionally that you were barely able to work. Yun, the second manager, took you aside and offered you, after the shoot was over, to spend some more time up here alone, so you could rest a little bit. You were so grateful to him at that moment, because it was exactly what you needed. When everyone was gone, you took off your shoes and sat on the first stairs of the pool. You pull up your dress and put your legs in the lukewarm water. You close your eyes for a moment to find yourself and lean back. When you open your eyes again you see the city skyline. It was all so powerful and magnificent that it took your breath away for a moment. You were so focused on the gigantic houses and lights that you didn’t even realize anyone was coming to the penthouse. You look to the ground, to the left of you, and you recognize two feet that are just take off their shoes. And then they also wandered into the water and the man's body sat down next to you. It was Jaehyun, the man who has kept your pulse going up lately.

"Taeyong told me that you are here." His voice was very gentle and he looked at you with a warm look. You nod and look into the distance again. As beautiful as it was here, your sadness didn’t disappear.

"What happened today?" He asked, putting an arm around you. Skinshipping felt good with him. It's been happening lately, that touches are piling up and the tension between you is getting more and more intense.

"My dad - it’s complicated, but he got married…to my best friend…and I didn’t know about it." You lean your head on his shoulder and for the first time that day you didn’t feel like crying.

"Wow that's tough." You notice even the surprise in his voice. His hand rubbed over your upper arm and he pushed you a little closer to you.

"I don't know why it annoys me so much, because I haven’t had contact with my father for more than a year, but he's the last of my family since my mother died." You sigh briefly, but for the first time you feel halfway well again that day. Jaehyun always managed to make you feel good.

"It's really hard, but hey, we're just your family now: the team, Johnny, Doyoung, Mark, Renjun, and so on. And of course, me." You look up at him and he smiled widely.

"You're now a part of the family, and Renjun is almost a son to you anyway." He laughed slightly and for the first time you had to giggle again. For the first time that evening, you felt normal again and it made Jaehyun happy that he could give you such a safe feeling. He leaned his forehead against yours and looked into your eyes. You had to smile as his wonderful dimples formed. It was quiet between you two for a while and then he rolled off his forehead and the tips of your noses touched. His breath mingled with yours and your pulse suddenly rose again as his lips touched yours.

You didn’t know if the memory of your first kiss made you sad, or just melancholic. But you knew that you no longer felt well next to Jaehyun. You had to get away from him to just breathe. You couldn’t once again be reminded of your past relationship anymore.

"I have to get up for a moment." Jaehyun looks at you in astonishment as you rise from your chair and walk to the stairs leading to the lower floor. Alcohol doesn’t make it easy for you to go straight. But you try to push forward slowly, step by step, to catch your breath in the lower floor where there was no one. You lean against the couch and close your eyes for a moment. It hurt so much to have Jaehyun so close to you again. Why did he have to tease you like that all the time? It was already hard enough to leave the company anyway. But you didn’t want to be dependent on Jaehyun, you didn’t want to be dependent on a man.

"Y/N." You suddenly hear his voice and hope that it is just an imagination. But when you open your eyes, Jaehyun stood in front of you.

"Are you alright?" He asked and taking a step towards you. You tap a few fingers against your forehead and sigh desperately.

„Yes…yes it’s alright. I think I should go home." Your plan wasn’t to stay long anyway and besides, the next day, Renjun come wanted to see you. Even if it wasn’t late, you should go home. But suddenly you feel a hard grip around your wrist. You remove your other hand from your forehead and look at Jaehyun. He looks at you wide-eyed, almost desperately.

"Please don’t go yet." He still didn’t let go of your wrist and went closer to you instead.

"Jaehyun ... I have to ..." Before you could say more, you feel Jaehyun's lips pressed against yours. His hands clasped your hips tight and in that moment you became weak. You fall for him and it filled you with all that you have lost the last few months. His lips parted from yours and he kissed your neck instead. His hands moved up over your waist.

"You look so amazing today," he murmured in your neck as he tries to keep kissing you. As he buried his face in your breasts, you moan softly. His touches felt so good. It was like medicine, which was the remedy for your incredible pain. Everything suddenly felt different. Everything was suddenly easy.

He pushed your dress up a bit so he could spread your legs a bit. As he positioned himself in front of you, you feel his bulge pressing against your thigh. Oh God! That was exactly what you wanted for so long.

His hands are now under your dress and he stroked the fine fabric of your panties. He knew you well. Too good. Because the first touch was already a direct hit. You moan quietly and it was followed by a grunt of his side. He started to rub over the fabric and you barely withstand the tension. You clasp with your hands his shoulders and buried your face in his chest.

"Fuck, I missed you…I missed this.“ He whispered in your ear and you could barely realize what he was saying.

"Jaehyun, I need you! I have to feel you." You look up at him and reach his chest. It was exactly what he wanted to hear. He grabbed his belt buckle and when he wanted to open it, you two suddenly hears a laughter that came closer and closer.

"Shit," cursed Jaehyun and straightening his belt. You jumped up also immediately and pull your dress right again. A few people came down the stairs and talked. You decide to pretend that nothing has happened and return to the others.

In the meantime the awkward sitting situation had broken loose and you are looking for Jiho.

"She's gone with Kibum, I'll never understand the two," Johnny replied as you asked him about your friend.

"Neither do I." You laugh and see how suddenly Mark came to you with shots. He handed each of you a glass and you still trying to refuse it. But Mark doesn’t let that happen and together with Johnny, Jaehyun, Haechan and Doyoung you drink a few more. You had to admit that the evening was funnier than you thought and you were going to be a bit sentimental. Was it really the right decision to leave the company? But you didn’t try to think about it that often and just enjoy the evening. After the last shot you could hardly hold yourself. None of you was sober anymore and it was time for you to go home.

You try to call a taxi with your phone, but you were too drunk to even unlock your screen.

"I think it's not a good idea for you to go home." Jaehyun pulled you closer. There were only you six in the penthouse and everyone knew about your relationship. So no one of you had to think twice about your touches.

„No, I can do it, I can’t sleep here. " You're trying to enter your code again, but your phone just didn’t want to unlock.

"Jaehyun was more likely to suggest that you come to us, since Kibum isn’t there today anyway," Johnny said and pressing the button to call the lift. You don’t say anything anymore and just followed the guys. A taxi took you to the dorm and you were glad to be able to lie in bed soon. You were so shaky on your legs that you didn’t even manage to take off your shoes. Jaehyun knelt in front of you, gently took your leg and pulled your high heels off your feet. When he straightened up, he grabbed your body and carried you into the bedroom. Even though Jaehyun himself was drunk, he never forgot his manners.

Haechan was already in his pajamas and mumbled something about "not being too loud". From that moment everything blurred more and more. The alcohol took from now on the supremacy of your thinking and acting. There are only fragments that remind you of this night. You knew Jaehyun helped you out of the dress. You still knew that you felt his lips and you remembered his fragrance. He put then his shirt on you and the last thing you remember before you fell asleep was his words.

"That I left you wasn’t my decision. I don’t want you to leave." Your brain catches hardly his words anymore. You only feel his warm hand on your body and the last thing you said was "Please don’t let me go.“

22 hours till the decision

You wake up with an unbelievable headaches and you need a little bit of time to realize where you were. You recognize the room immediately and you first see the empty bed from Haechan. He was already awake and leaved the room. And suddenly you start to feel your body again. An arm lay over you and as you look down at you, you could see that you were wearing a men's shirt. You turned to the other side of the bed and see Jaehyun lying next to you. He reacted to your movement, but his eyes were still closed. You inspect him for a few minutes. He only had his Calvins on and because of the alcohol was his body completely dehydrated, so his abs stood out - more than normal. You were a person who had never actually looked at good looks. But you were clearly attracted to Jaehyun's body. It caused an incredible tension and tingling in you.

With a jerk, you try to sit up and realize that everything was spinning around you. Your head is pounding and you are longing after a simple shower. Besides, you weren’t comfortable with Jaehyun lying next to you. You had no clue what happened when you got into the dorm. Did you sleep together? Was there more between you two? You check your body for any clues, but at that moment Jaehyun opened his eyes.

"Morning." He smiled and looked up at you in a relatively good mood. At that moment you became doubtful. If you had slept with him, that would be more bad than appropriate.

"Morning." You stammer and looking for your dress.

"I'll go soon. Renjun is coming to me and I have to ..." Suddenly you feel a hand on your thigh and you slowly turn back to Jaehyun.

"But you have still time for a coffee, right?" He looked at you wide-eyed and you just couldn’t resist him. God, how can someone still look so good after drinking so much?

You nod and he immediately jumped up to go to the kitchen. In the meantime, you stayed in the bed and looked in the mirror, which was placed on opposite of Jaehyun's bed. Your makeup was still on your face, maybe a little faded, but it still looked half-decent. You run your fingers through your hair to brush it a little bit. From the kitchen you hear the grinding of the coffee machine and slowly the fragrance fly also into the room. It doesn’t take long before Jaehyun came in with a tablet with two cups and two glasses of water. He carefully set it down and handed you a small tablet.

"That's against the hangover.“ With his other hand he took a glass of water and handed it to also you. You take the tablet and swallow it down quickly. Jaehyun had just taken a sip of his coffee when you look at him questioningly.

„Jaehyun? Do we have ...?" You weren’t been able to say more words. You keep trying to remember the last night, but there were always gaps in your memory. A small smile appeared on his face, but he shook his head.

„Don’t we have the no-sex-in-the-dorm-rule?“ It wasn’t like you two didn’t want to have sex with each other when you were in a relationship. You did it for security reasons. After all, two of the managers also lived in the dorm. Your relationship should be as secretive as possible, only a few people knew about you two. On the other hand, you didn’t do it out of respect for the roommates. After all, Haechan was still a minor when you two came together.

But very early, a peculiar charm developed around this no-sex-in-the-dorm-rule. Sometimes, when the circumstances were good, you came in the dorm to hang out with Jaehyun. You could still remember a certain moment. Your relationship was very new and you two haven’t slept together, because you waited for a quiet moment. Nobody should be able to disturb you and it turned out, that finding such a moment wasn’t easy. At this timer was always an overwrought sexual tension between you two. Each touch made the tension even more intense and in the end you could hardly have a normal conversation. Everything about the other body was attractive and sexual. Make-outs were almost torture and sometimes you were just about to fuck in the shower quickly.

You could still remember this moment exactly. Haechan wasn’t in the dorm and Jaehyun was sitting in his bed with you. He leaned against the wall and clutched his big pillow. You sat on the other side, because you were avoiding any touch that could tempt you two.

"What are we going to do now?" Jaehyun asked while he was looking at the ceiling. You think for a moment and dig your fingers in your knee.

"Hmm...we could play a game." It wasn’t easy to find something where you would always be tempted to just start to fuck.

"A game? What's in your head?" Jaehyun turned his gaze back to you and pushed the pillow a little closer to himself.

"21 questions. We ask each other personal questions and we have to answer them honestly." You thought that this idea were funny. So you would get to know parts of Jaehyun that you didn’t know yet.

"And the questions can be about everything?" When he asked cautiously, you could already see how he was thinking about the next questions.

"Yes, everything! I'll start. So my first question is, what do you like to spend money on? "Jaehyun nodded intelligibly and thought for a moment.

"Hmm .... maybe food and coffee?“ You had to smile. The answer was simple but honest. That's what you liked about him. Then Jaehyun straightened up a bit and briefly considered his next question.

"Were you rather calm or wild in your puberty?" One had to let him, he knew how to ask interesting questions.

"I came to Korea with my dad when I was 15. So I was in a country where I couldn’t speak the language and he had a girlfriend back then, who was only 6 years older than I. Of course I started to rebelling, because it wasn’t easy this time." It was the first time you had talked to him about your father. You thought it would feel weird, but with Jaehyun you had a good feeling, so for the first time in your life, you didn’t mind talking about him.

It was your turn again and you didn’t really know a good question. At that moment, you ask yourself why you just suggested this game. You were in these things quite uncreative. But it didn’t help, you had to ask him something.

"How was your first time?" Jaehyun's eyes suddenly twitched and he looked over at you in surprise.

"It was just weird. I had no idea what I was doing and I didn’t want to hurt her." You had to smile at the answer, it was kind of cute.

„Hmm okay…my turn. Do you remember what your first orgasm felt like?" When Jaehyun asked this question, you soon realize in what direction your game was going. You had to swallow, because your body suddenly became restless. You pull your legs a little together to calm the pressure in your middle.

„I thought I knew what an orgasm was, but when I got my first, I knew how wrong I was. At first I didn’t know what was happening to me, my whole body was vibrating and tears came to my eyes." Jaehyun nervously ruffled his hair after you answered. The whole questions didn’t make your situation any easier.

"Ok my next question is: How long does it take you to get yourself off, on average?" You bite your lower lip and imagine Jaehyun sitting alone in the room and maybe thinking of you as he jerks himself off. You feel like you got very wet and you presses instinctively even more your legs together.

"Often I don’t have that much time because we're rarely alone. I'd say 5-10 minutes.“ You thought he would spend more time, but you understand that it wasn’t easy to take the time for yourself when so many guys live in one apartment. You could hardly imagine that, because for you was masturbation something you took an amount of time. But you also live alone in a small one-room apartment, so it was easy for you.

"Are you good at giving head?" Jaehyun presses his lips together and you can imagine what kind of scenario was going on in his mind. The conversation was so stimulating that you by only a movement and the friction with your pant, a wave of lust overcame you.

"I don’t think I can answer that question, but so far I have only received compliments." You wink, while Jaehyun buried himself more and more in his pillow. He clearly seemed to hide something. But for now it was your turn again.

"Are you hard?" You couldn’t handle all this anymore. You would prefer to fuck Jaehyun right now. Your panties were already soaked with your juice and you couldn’t continue this game for one second. Jaehyun gave up and leaned against the wall with the back of his head. He put the pillow over his lap aside and you could see how under his sweatpants a large bump had formed. He tries to keep his hands as far away as possible. But you were fascinated because you hadn’t seen his dick yet. You crawl over to him and sat right in front of him. He looks at you expectantly as you lean closer to his body.

"If I help you get rid of your bump, it's not sex, and it does not affect the no-sex-in-the-dorm-rule, or?“ You reach for his waistband and push your fingers a little under his shorts. Jaehyun couldn’t say more than a "oh my god" and he looked up to the ceiling for a moment. You take this as approval and pulled his sweatpants down so far, so that his erection jumped out.

And there he was in front of you. Not too big, not too small, thick and beautiful pink. His dick was extremely hard and the veins that stood out were bulging with all the blood inside. With your hands, you reach for the lower part of his best piece, while your lips were wrapped around his tip. You could suddenly hear a moan from Jaehyun and you feel his dick twitching. You knew that he didn’t need long to climax, since he was already so hypersensitive. You slowly introduce him deeper into your mouth so that his tip presses against your throat. You pull it out immediately and start your movement again. But this time your hand moved too and Jaehyun almost drove this crazy. He put his hand on your head and followed your movement.

"God, your mouth feels so good." You hear him breathe loudly and you notice how his pelvis lifted up and down. So you get faster with your movement. The pressure of your hand around his dick became tighter and you press your lips even more together.

"Shit. I'm com…a-ah..oh my god." You hear Jaehyun moaning, followed by a taste of a warm but slightly bitter substance. You decide to show him his orgasm. You stick out your tongue, which was covered with his white cum.

"Good girl." He took your chin and looked at his work until you swallow it. You still see that Jaehyun's breathing is heavy, as his chest moved visibly up and down. You wish you had more time to feel his dick inside you. But that wasn’t possible yet.

Jaehyun pulled his sweatpants back up and kissed you.

"You can clearly say that you can give a great head.“

"What are you thinking about?" Jaehyun put the empty cup back on the tablet. You feel a bit caught and you didn’t want to give him an honest answer.

"Oh, nothing. I think it was really funny yesterday.“ That was a lie of course, because you were thinking about sucking his dick. But you should go anyway, because every second hurt you to be here. You pick up your dress, that was over Jaehyun's desk chair and turn back to him shortly. You just wanted to change your clothes, when you realize that you were completely naked under the shirt.

"It doesn’t bother you or? I mean, you've already seen me naked." He shakes his head, but you still turn your back to him as you take off his shirt. But you could feel still his gaze on your body. You try to ignore it and put on your dress.

"Jaehyun?" You take your clutch and turn back to him again. He looks up to you and waits for more words from you.

"What did you mean when you said it wasn’t your decision to leave me?" It was one of the few pieces that you remembered from yesterday. But you were too tired and drunk to react in this moment. Jaehyun face got a little pale and he shook his head.

„Oh I don’t know. I was pretty drunk yesterday. I have no idea what I have said." He smiled and shrugged with his shoulders. The answer wasn’t persuasive for you, but it wasn’t important anymore, as you would be leaving soon anyway.

„Goodbye Jaehyun." You turn around and leave the room. Tears started to come up again and you try to leave the dorm as fast as possible.

18 hours till the decision

Your hangover was too strong, so you couldn’t cook. That's why you quickly brought something for you and Renjun from your favorite Italian restaurant.

Renjun just got off the training and devoured his lasagna within seconds. He talked about the new comeback and how hard everybody had to work. You listen to him and could barely touch your food anymore. Your heart started pounding while you put your lips on your hand. With your arm, you support your face and you hoped that you don’t start to shiver. Was it selfish to leave the company? Just the thought, leaving Renjun behind, broke your heart. He had become your family and now you would leave them.

"Everything okay?" Renjun became aware that you are no longer listening to him. You lean forward a bit and slowly lower your arms to the table. You breathe deeply and fight with your tears.

"I got an offer from YG-Entertainment, they want me to work for them." It was hard for you to pronounce this words, but Renjun didn’t really respond.

"You're always getting offers, you're good at your job." He smiled and took a big sip of his coffee. You have to take a deep breath. Oh god, how could you explain it to him?

"They give me the same salary too and I'll probably give them my final confirmation tomorrow." You clasp your mug and look carefully at Renjun. He suddenly turned white in the face and looks at you in horror. You could see all his disappointment from his face.

"What?" His voice was shaky. He keeps staring at you, waiting for an explanation.

"I can’t see Jaehyun anymore, it's like a pain that I can’t handle. If I don’t go, I'll execute myself." A tear rolls down and you wipe it away quickly. You didn’t want to look fragile, you wanted to be strong for him.

"And then you leave us all behind? What about Jisung, Chenle, Jeno, Jaemin, Haechan, Mark, Ten, Johnny, Doyoung?" He listed all those who became important to you in this time.

„You're leaving because of one person and you have so many who are there for you!" Renjun was angry and you couldn’t blame him. But you couldn’t explain this all to him, you couldn’t describe what you feel, what makes you so broken.

"Once you have loved liked this, then you will understand." You gently stroke his cheek and you could hear his angry snort. But Renjun didn’t want to hear that. He slammed his fist on the table and buried his face in his arm. You hear a sob and now you couldn’t hold yourself back, so you started to cry too.

"Hey Renjun." You go over to him and take him in your arms.

"But I'll always be there for you, okay?" You push him closer to your chest. It broke your heart to see him like this.

"You can come whenever you want, you can call me anytime, I'll be there for you." You stroke his hair and try to hold back your crying a little. Renjun didn’t dare to look at you, his sobs didn’t stop and you couldn’t do anything but just be there for him. You sat there for a while and you both cry and cry. But it was a relief for you to finally allow to show emotions. It would feel so liberating if Renjun didn’t break your heart.

Suddenly someone rings at your door and you wonder who it could be. Actually you don’t expect a visit anymore. You wipe the tears from your face away and Renjun straightened up too. Just before the door opens, you try to collect yourself a bit and take a deep breath.

When the door was open, you almost froze.

"May I come in?" Jaehyun stood in front of you. You could hardly believe it and so you took a step aside.

"Um...I have to take Renjun back to the company." You go back to the table where he sat. But he immediately jumped up and grabbed his backpack.

"No, it's okay, I'll take a taxi." He tries to smile, but you could see that it wasn’t easy for him. Jaehyun was already in your apartment and was staring around. What was wrong, you asked yourself and tried to get an overview.

„Renjun! No, I really want to drive you." You didn’t want to leave him alone again. You couldn’t handle that too. It's okay if everyone turns away from you, but Renjun should always be able to come to you.

"It's okay. Really.“ His smile was honest and convincing. He hugged you and whispered in your ear „Don't forget us".

"No way!" You pressed him as close as you can to you, before you let him go. Renjun threw the backpack over one shoulder, picked up his iPhone, and as he passed by Jaehyun, he told him something that you couldn’t understand. When the door closed, it hit you like a lightning. You turn away from Jaehyun because you couldn’t look at him anymore. Because of him you had to go through this.

„Why are you here?“ You didn’t look at him, you just couldn’t. Otherwise you would be weak again.

"If you leave, how long will you stay in the company?" He indicated that you still had a notice period. But you had already considered that.

"I'll let the two companies clear this up, but YG needs me now. I’m going to spend the rest of my vacation so I can leave SM right now." You had accumulated an incredible amount of extra hours at SM as well, so that you can go easily.

"That means you're probably going tomorrow?" His voice sounded so weak and quiet that you turned to face him. He stood closer to you and looked at you with his sad eyes. You just nod and try to dodge his glance a little.

"I wish you wouldn’t go." He took another step towards you and you dare to look at him again.

"Jaehyun, what should I do? I love you, and I can’t stop this feelings for you. It just destroys me to be so close to you." Tears came up again, because you were so mad at him. How could he just allow himself to say something like that? He was the one who had left you. He was the one who put his career over his relationship. You hadn’t condemned his decision anytime because you could always understand him somehow. But he couldn’t ask you to stay.

„Y/N…I..." He stopped talking, but instead he grabbed your hips and kissed you. His grip was firm, as if he would never let you go again. He pressed himself closer to your body and his right hand went under your hair. He showed you that he wanted to feel you fully. At that moment, you couldn’t be strong anymore. You just let yourself go. He started to remove your dress so that you only stood in front of him in your underwear. Your hands went under his shirt so you could feel his stomach. You feel his breathing, how everything moved up and down. Jaehyun broke away from your kiss and removed his shirt to make it easier for you. Then immediately his lips looked for yours again. But his hand was also on the way and he began to feel your whole body. He slipped his hand under your bra and started massaging your breasts. He moaned softly between your lips and you start to open his belt. When he took off his pants himself, he stopped again briefly and was completely out of breath.

"Maybe we should go where it is more comfortable?" He smiled and stroked your cheek. You just nod, because you were so devoted to him that you forgot the language. Suddenly he bent down and grabbed you by your thigh and he put you over his shoulders.

„Jaehyun! What are you doing?“ You had to laugh as your upper body dangled over his back.

"I carry you upstairs.“ He goes up the stairs, which led to a simple platform where you had a large mattress.

When he was up, he gently laid you on the sheets and kissed you softly.

"Do you know how beautiful you are?" He kissed your neck as he pulled down the straps of your bra.

"And how incredibly sexy you are?" His hand strokes firmly over your panties. You moan softly and whimper for more. You wanted more of him, to feel him forever. You stroke his middle and feel that a bump has formed. It was like earlier, you could feel him again, smell it and taste it. All your senses were occupied with Jaehyun. You turn on your stomach so he could better open your bra. When it was removed, you lay there, because Jaehyun clutched your ass, so you lifted your butt up and he buried his face in it. He pulled down your panties and as you look back, you can see how he also removed himself from his Calvins. You see his dick in the corner of your eye and that his member stood already swollen away from him. You can also see him starting to touch himself. You already wanted to turn yourself so that you could help him. But suddenly you feel his mouth between your legs. A groan escaped you surprisingly and you feel how his tongue pampers you. He grabbed with both hands your ass and he licked you, as if he was starving. Jaehyun was incredibly talented with his tongue. He was the first guy, who licked you with such devotion. He never did half things, he was always good at it.

You lean against the mattress with your upper body, your breasts pressed firmly against the white sheet, while your ass is pointing up. He stopped licking you and you wonder what would happen now. You place your arms behind your back and Jaehyun grabbed your wrists so you could barely move. With his fingers, he stroked gently over your folds to moisten them a little. Suddenly stopped his middle finger in front of your entrance and he gently pushed him inside you. You moan quietly and closed your eyes for a moment to enjoy this. His other fingers started to claw in your skin and you feel that the pressure of his body is more on you. You knew what that meant.

"I'm going to fuck you so hard today that you'll never forget me.“ Jaehyun suddenly became faster in his movement. His middle finger pushed as fast and hard as it went, in and out. You suddenly feel the good feeling and your body bends. But Jaehyun had you so tight in his grasp that you can barely break free. You start moaning in the sheet. You couldn’t be quiet anymore, that was all too intense. No second was quiet anymore. You just couldn’t stop moaning. Your body started shaking and your feet contracted.

And suddenly Jaehyun stopped. But his right hand was still tight around your wrists, so you couldn’t see what happened. You feel his knees at your feet and you feel how he stroke with the tip of his dick between your folds. He stopped again for a few seconds. But then you feel how he slowly penetrated you with the tip.

"I've been waiting so long to feel you again." A grunt escaped him as he slowly pushed his entire length inside you. You feel how your wet walls getting stretched and it took your breath away for a second when he was completely inside you. Two or three times he slowly pushed his dick in and out, but then he put his other hand on your left buttock and leaned with his weight even more on you. His movement became faster in a short time and now he begins to moan softly. His hip bones slapped against your ass, making a clapping sound. He was getting faster and faster, you are screaming louder and louder. Until he leans back and let your wrist be free. His thrusts got slower until he stopped completely. You try to follow his movement with your ass. You wanted more, you were greedy for his dick. But Jaehyun stops you. He leans over to you and kissed the back of your head.

"I want to see your breasts bounce when I fuck you. I want to see your face when you come." A shiver ran down your spine as he whispered this in your ear. Jaehyun turns you on your back, leaning over you and kissing your neck.

"And I want to hear you scream." He grunts as he distributes more kisses to your body. You raise yourself a bit to see Jaehyun better. With your hands you support yourself behind your back. You spread your legs and Jaehyun positions himself immediately in front of you. You were so well-tuned together that everything felt incredibly natural.

"You are so beautiful," he says, looking at your whole body.

"I wish I could take you like that every day." And with these words he penetrated into you again. He leaned back slightly to get better control of his loins. While he fucks you like this, his hands wandered over your breasts, squeezing them a bit. Then his hands moved over your lips. He played with your mouth with his thumb. You start to play with it, suck it a little, which Jaehyun started to groan and closed his eyes in pleasure for a moment. When he opened it again, he became faster and penetrated deeper and deeper into you. Your breath became louder and mated with your moans. Jaehyun put his hand under your ass to fuck you even harder. He was thus better in control of your body and could bring your body even closer to his.

Your breasts bounced to the faster movement and you feel how the wave of your orgasm slowly came. You're starting to get louder, your moaning transforms to a scream. Tears ran down your cheeks and Jaehyun didn’t stop. He fucked you over and over until your body couldn’t handle it anymore. Your body twitched and vibrated because of your hypersensitivity. But Jaehyun still went faster and suddenly you hear a loud moaning on his part and you feel how it got warm under you. His body collapsed on yours and you feel his warm breath. You slowly stroke his hair and played with his silver chain around his neck, which he somehow never took off.

You two were enjoying the moment and your bodies.

It wasn’t more.

It was simple.

It was perfect.

9 hours till the decision

You came so often that afternoon and evening that you couldn’t count it anymore. It was like he was putting all his energy into you. But late at night Jaehyun also reached his limits. After you ordered pizza and he brought you to come again, you are lying naked in bed.

„Can you sing for me?“ He asked while closing his eyes. He seemed so incredibly relaxed that you hadn’t seen him like this for a long time.

„Every night you come back to me, every night I forgive. Thats what it means, that what it means to be where home is. Everyone leaves eventually, but they never forget. Thats what it means, that what it means to be where home is.“ You begin to sing the first lines. You weren’t a great singer, but you sang this song to Jaehyun often, if he couldn’t relax in the evening. It was his lullaby that only you could sing for him. The song was originally produced by the J-Rock artist MIYAVI, who worked for this song with his wife together. She sings the song and it has so much emotion and love in it.

„Thats what it means, that what it means to be where home is.“ You stroke his hair and felt his relaxed breathing. It was so unbendingly to look at him, because he was so calm. And at that moment it felt like you two were alone in this world and only your love would exist.

„Tell me what is like out there. Tell me how they love you, like I love you. Tell me how you fought out there. Tell me how they love you, like I love you.“ This song brought so many memories back. You see the memorabilia pass by in pictures and you try to keep every part as good as possible in your mind. You wish that you could once again turn back time and enjoy the moment when you could still be a couple. You suddenly remember so much. Like when he brought you a card of one of his favorite pictures in the Guggenheim Museum, or when he used every moment to touch you, even if it was just a fingertip touch.

„When the sun comes up and the silence comes. Tell me, that you know I’m here. Tell me that you love me, like I love you.“ As you stopped singing, you suddenly feel that strong pain again. He will never return, you will never come back. It was the last night you spend together and then your love will only exist in past memories.

You lie down next to him and try to close your eyes too. But suddenly Jaehyun turns to look at you calmly.

„Y/N, I love you." He kissed you and then put his forehead on yours. You couldn’t say a word, you would love to start crying again, but you've already cried so much that day, so you just look at him. He closed his eyes with a smile and in that moment you feel a wave of happiness. You sleep in his arms and for a long time you have felt peace in your heart again.

1 hour till the decision

All night you were only accompanied by a light sleep. Again and again you woke up and looked over to Jaehyun, who sleeps calmly. At some point you couldn't lie in your bed anymore and you stood up. You put the blanket aside and walked down the stairs. You urgently needed a shower, after all, there was still all the sweat and cum from the past day on you. You couldn’t sign the contracts with YG in this condition.

In the bathroom, you turn on some Lofi music and try to relax with a warm shower. You close your eyes and pictures of last night came in your mind. You still feel Jaehyun on you, partly because you were still sore down. It was so perfect yesterday, as if everything was going to be normal. But today is day X and you will leave now.

After getting fresh, putting on some clothes and applying make-up, you start making coffee for you and Jaehyun. It didn’t took long before the whole apartment smelled after coffee and Jaehyun started to get up. As he walked down the stairs, he was pulling up his Calvins and his smile was sweet as sugar. He stood behind you and hugged you.

"Good Morning." He buried his face in your neck. You lean your head to the side and enjoy his lips on your skin. If it had been a normal day, then you would have loved that it ended in morning sex. But you had to leave soon, and he had to go too.

"I made coffee, do you like it?" You lift the coffee pot from the stove and start to fill the liquid in a cup.

"You're the only person I know who doesn’t have a regular coffee machine and uses an espresso maker." He laughed and broke away from you. He leaned against the kitchen counter and watched as you continued to prepare the coffee.

"Coffee machines don’t make good coffee, and the espresso maker creates the perfect heat and pressure for the best coffee." You fill a little milk inside and give him his cup. He laughed again and took a sip of the coffee.

"You are unique. Do you know that?" His eyes suddenly stared at you and at first you didn’t know how to react.

"Don't say such things." You put down your mug and stroking your hair. He didn’t make it easy for you to leave the whole time. But now he act like your boyfriend and that offend you a little bit. He felt immediately your displeasure and also set aside his cup. His eyes became serious and he gently touched your hips. Then he drew you a little closer to himself and looked deep into your eyes.

"Y/N, I love you. Really…“ You didn’t know how to react. His hands on you felt incredibly good again and you wanted him to never leave you again. You would like to jump into his arms and scream. But there was no room for your love in this life.

"We should go." Your voice was low and shaky. You fight with your tears, but it didn’t help. With a desperate sigh let Jaehyun you go and got dressed. You pack your things and took your car key.

"Shall I drive you to the company?" You didn’t want to let him go, you wanted to spend every last second with him. You knew it was not good for you, but you had a war in your mind that nobody could win.

Jaehyun nodded and you both leave the apartment in silence.

The drive was quiet. It was just a short ride that you already knew the route well. Still, you stare at the street as if you were learning to drive. You can feel his eyes on you, but you couldn’t reciprocate him because you knew that you would burst into tears.

You park your car in the parking lot of SM and turn off the engine. But none of you got out. It was tremendous quiet between you two. You turn to Jaehyun and dare to look him in the eyes. His look was warm and loving. How much would you like to watch him over and over again. But these times were over now.

"Y/N" He took your hand and you look how glassy his eyes were.

"I don’t want that you leave.“ You had to swallow, but after the last hours it was somehow clear to you that these words had to come.

"Can we be together again?" You already knew the answer to that question, but you wanted to ask him again. All that you two had now, you could always have.

"You know we can’t do that, it's just not possible." You hear the despair in his voice and for the first time it seemed to you honest.

"Then you have your answer, right?" Your hands are interlock together and you notice more and more tears gathering in your eyes.

"I've made that decision for us, not just for me! It's also about your life and your career." He sounded almost desperate and you just don’t understand what he meant by that.

"You tell me that again and again, but it make no sense for me. And my career?“ You pause briefly and looked at him with wide eyes before continuing.

"This isn’t important anymore Jaehyun. You showed me what love is and my goal isn’t anymore to have a good job, a career and to have a lot of money. I want to feel what I have felt for you again. And if I have this, I want to marry him and have some wonderful children with him." A tear rolled over your cheek and you had to laugh a little.

"I think that makes you to an adult or? When you finally know what you want in life.“ At that moment, Jaehyun put his palm on your cheek and brushed away a tear with his thumb, and when you look at him you can see that he's also fighting with his tears.

"Thank you Jaehyun, for showing me what love is, and I will never forget what you have done for me. But I have to let you go now, otherwise I can never learn to love again." More tears rolled down your cheek and suddenly you hear a sob from Jaehyun. He took his second hand, put it on your other cheek and put his forehead on yours. You can feel the salty tears now pouring down his face. It was a strange feeling, because you had never seen Jaehyun cry before.

"And you will meet a beautiful girl and marry her, you will have beautiful children and maybe one day we will meet at the playground with our children and we will reminisce and laugh about this time." More tears streamed down your face and your sobs grew louder. It was strange. You were face to face to Jaehyun and you both sat there and cried. But you had to leave. You slowly pull yourself up and try to smile. Your eyes sparkled and you look down at Jaehyun who is still burying his face.

„I love you Jung Jaehyun. I love you so much and because of this it hurts so much that I can’t have you. That's why I have to go.“ You lift his head and look at him. Tears ran down his face.

"I love you too." You realized that he tried really to collect himself. Your lips touched and joined in a kiss. This moment felt like time was standing still. His touch was hot, his lips were full and all your longings were filled in that one second. This moment would never fade away, it would always remain in a memory that would never disappear from your mind again. No man would be like Jaehyun anymore. Anyone else you would kiss would you compare to this kiss. Could you really love a man who wasn’t Jaehyun?

After this kiss, you weren’t sure anymore. After he broke away from you, you held your breath for a moment. He left the car and you look after him for a few seconds. When he was no longer in sight, you burst into tears. Your sobs growing loud and you couldn’t breathe for a few seconds. It was almost like a panic attack. The knife pierced your chest again and you felt the strong physical pain again. You wanted to scream, but no noises came out. You hold your fist in front of your heart and your upper body cramped. You are here for a few minutes, hoping that the pain would soon stop.

_______________________________________________________________________

"We are really pleased that you have chosen us, don’t worry about SM. We are going to take care of that. Now you have to focus on your work and there will be a lot to come on." You look at the man standing in front of you and you couldn’t say much. Not even a smile was possible.

"Here's the contract, you just have to sign here and the rest is fixed." He handed you some papers that you read carefully. You had already received a draft of the contract. This is hardly differed from the other one.

You take the pen and want to sign, but you hesitate for a moment. With this signature, you would let Jaehyun go completely. There was no way to see him anymore. This signature would mean your final end. But Jaehyun seems to have already made the decision for both of you.

You take the contract and perpetuate your signature on it.

Now you have made the decision.

It didn’t make sense to thought about it anyway, because a relationship with Jaehyun was hopeless.

#nct #nct 127 #nct u #nct smut #nct 127 smut #nct u smut #jaehyun #jung jaehyun #jaehyun scenario #jaehyun x reader #jaehyun smut #jaehyun angst #jaehyun fluff #jaehyun imagines #nct fluff #nct angst #nct 127 fluff #nct 127 angst

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matchupgarden · 3 years

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Hi there! I only read one of your matchups but I'm already impressed by your style of writing them, like it's so cute :0 Could I ask for a one too? A male character, please? My mbti is INFJ and my star sign is a virgo, go by she/her. I'm female, 158cm with pale skin, blue eyes, glasses and dark brown hair with purple tips.

I'm generally an introverted person—quiet, seemingly distant and even scary at first. However, I tend to warm up to others rather fast and become friendly 😊 (though even then some say I'm mysterious?) I love listening to others and analysing the environments as well as the people around me to learn. I am very passionate about the things I care about, like family, my hobbies and values. I'm quite decisive and independent as well. I rarely get angry but when I do I can get a bit fierce and stubborn. I always try to look at the positive side of the situation but sometimes this can lead to begin naïve. I also really don't like being the centre of attention and tend to get anxious in larger groups (currently trying to overcome this).

My hobbies are singing (karaoke nights are the best), hiking, learning languages, making jewellery and writing. Generally using my hands is a lot of fun! I also enjoy baking, chocolate and love sweets. I have a huge soft spot for dogs, plants and birds!

My type of person is someone loyal and caring, someone who's more extroverted in me to help me satisfy my curiosity about my surroundings and knows I'm intact with my emotions. Also, hopefully they don't mind my dumb puns😄

Thank you so much! I hope this wasn't too much to read😅 Have a lovely day, and good luck with your blog!!

Hi! Ahh thank you sm for submitting! I really enjoyed reading your description you sound fun to be around! I matched you with...

Atsumu!

Okay wait so I know a lot of people have mixed feelings about this setter but you can’t tell me he wouldn’t be a good boyfriend! Reading your descriptions it kind of just clicked~

Atsumu adores you and that’s just a fact! The first time he saw you he wasn’t scared or intimidated at all I really don’t think he even noticed! Even though he has fan girls I feel like he isn’t always the smoothest. When he first approached you he probably said some silly little pun that Osamu swears by is the most dumbest thing he’s heard. But when he heard you laugh in response and not even a fake one at that he was over the moon! (And the way you warmed up so quick to him!)

Atsumu would like your puns a little too much smh. He definitely finds them hilarious! Even to the point he goes and tells the whole team and brags about how funny his girlfriend is~

Despite others beliefs he’s not selfish he’s dedicated. I feel like the moment he finds out about you being anxious in big groups he’ll always keep a eye out to see if your okay. And lucky enough he’s a very positive persons and a reliable at that! He always has your back and in return all he ask is for you to accept his love!

This man is a teddy bear!! He himself gets a warm feeling all over no matter what you guys decide to do! See’s you run over to a dog? Melting. Seeing you belt your heart out to karaoke? yes. Hears you practicing different languages? Yes, yes and yes! Atsumu will also send you photos of birds he sees on jogs that he finds pretty or even take you on a hike to nature watch!

He himself is a extrovert and a very loud one at that. If he notices your curiosity start to peak at something but to shy to ask he has no problem doing it for you! He’s respectful of your boundaries but still want’s to push you a bit! He may even want to be pushed a bit too so maybe try offering up teaching him how to make jewelry! (Or you and both the twins try baking together! Though it may end in a food fight)

He can be a little much sometimes and be a bit playful but he enjoys the fact the simple fact he can just be himself around you! A little annoying to deal with sometimes but ya got to love him~

I hope you liked your match! It wasn’t long at all and I really enjoyed writing it! Thank you sm for the support! Have a great day <3

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sugawara-sweetheart · 4 years

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omg no jahshshsh, ummmm i am ✨embarrassed✨ asking this but, i don’t have any friends akshshs like none because i just don’t speak a lot. do you have any advice on how to make friends/approach people in real life?? thank u sm!!

don’t be embarrassed at all about this!!! i think people underestimate how hard it is to make friends especially as a shy/anxious introvert so i’ll share some tips bc i somehow have friends ahahaha. like 2 years ago after i left high school i was asking the same questions so i’ll tell you what i think has helped me🥰

if someone approaches you, speak to them- like my first friend at college (who i ended up being like super close with) just randomly started speaking to me so i made sure to try and speak back with her and it helped!! if someone’s approaching you, you’ve probably intrigued them in some way or they probably want to be friends with you too so don’t worry about anything and just speak to them back :))

this leads on to my next tip which is if someone snaps you or dms you memes on insta or sends you tiktoks, they’re probably trying to initiate a friendship and get closer to you. make sure to reciprocate or do the same too!! if you follow someone you know vaguely on instagram for eg send them some memes or a video about something they like- even if you don’t like it! one guy i used to speak to hated soap cutting vids but used to send them to me bc i liked them ahahaha

be nice and respectful- this is more at the start bc idk me and my friends roast each other a lot ahahaha but you’ve got to read the person. but generally especially at the start be nice, respectful and civil not only to them but to the other people around you too. people only like mean people in movies lol. also don’t chat badly about other people too at the start bc it leaves a bad impression. just be a decent human which i’m sure you are!!!

talk and relate to people about your interests- okay personally i find it hard to speak to people who don’t have interests. so if you’re interested in something talk about it- whether it’s art, anime, music anything!! i also feel like you generally attract people who have similar energy to you- like all my friends are interested in fashion and art like me hehe so we have plenty to talk about. do the same and show people how interesting you are!!! if you’re both into music, ask to share spotifies with them or if you both like reading, recommend and share books with them?

if someone invites you out just go- going out with someone is a great bonding experience! two of my close friends now, on two separate occasions when we were just acquaintances or like kinda/little bit friends i went out with them and after we got super close bc we felt like we put in mutual effort and we got to know about each other! after my first week at college the first few people i was hanging out, i went out with one of them at the weekend and we stayed friends- the rest i drifted apart from lol. or ask if someone wants to hang out with you! maybe ask them if they wanna get lunch or even come with you to get a coffee!!

interact with your friend’s/acquaintances’ other friends. be open and friendly to them and chat with them bc if you have a mutual friend you’re probably likely to have something in common, even if it just starts off by saying hi to them. a lot of my friends i met through mutual friends and some i’m super close to, some are just acquaintances but it works!

smile at people. okay if you have a rbf like me this can be hard but if someone smiles at you or looks at you smile at them!! itll make you look approachable and give off a kind vibe

be able to joke with people. show people you’re fun and make jokes with them/laugh at their jokes or have fun conversations. i get you may not initiate the conversation but generally most of the time other people will which brings me back to tip 1- if people speak to you, speak back to them! also try to be versatile, sometimes you have to adjust to match people’s energies. it’s not changing yourself but rather dimming certain parts of your personality and accentuating other parts depending on your company :))

sometimes you just gotta randomly start convo. sometimes people won’t be as receptive but other times people can be super open to you! like one of my closest friends i met bc i was sat next to her in the library and started talking to her instead of studying and now we’re so close!! do that :)) it may be nerve-wracking at first but most of the time people are friendly and won’t mind! if you also think someone looks pretty cool or nice tell them! also ask about people about themselves!!

talk to your classmates. like ik it can be scary or you might think you have nothing to talk about but try and get in on class discussions or if your classmates are chatting, join in with them even if you only say a little bit in conversation. the thing with class is that you can easily go ignored if you stay quiet all the time and ik personally if someone in class didn’t speak to me after i tried speaking to them i’d just be like meh whatever. so engage with your classmates and again tip 1, if they speak to you speak back to them!!

i feel so very ugh😭😔 posting this tip but unfortunately i think most people are like this but try to look clean and presentable. unfortunately pretty privilege is a thing and people are nicer and more receptive to people who look neat. you don’t have to completely change your look or wear makeup if you don’t usually or whatever but the main thing is to look hygienic and clean like shower often, make sure your hair is tidy, clean under your nails etc bc people do be kinda judgemental😔my brother told me before i started sixth form that dress sense is important (we used to have uniform in high school so it didn’t matter back then) so in college i wore makeup and nice clothes and i noticed people would notice me, smile at me, say hi, give compliments that started convo etc. also wear stuff that makes you feel good about yourself which leads on to my next tip!!

be confident!! body language is so important and will give off your general vibe! so walk with a straight back, smile at people, look like you’re happy with yourself :)) even if you don’t feel like that unfortunately just fake it till you make it

go to extracurricular clubs where you can find people with similar interests!! i’ve met people at a creative writing club and a chemistry and medicine summer school :)) you’ll have similar interests so you can have something to talk about and plenty of time to hang out with them in the club

that’s all the advice i can think of so i really hope this helps and good luck with making friends! i’m always here for if you need more advice but also remember if you don’t feel like you can click with people don’t worry, you’ll find someone you will :)) it’s also not about having a big friendship group- it’s quality over quantity! choose good friends that you can have an amazing friendship, even if it’s only 2 or 3 friends rather than a whole group of people you’re not even compatible with. :)) i hope everything works out for you!!💞💞

#i hate tip 11 but its acc sadly what ive seen :((#i hope this helps🥺🥺#ily💞#interacting #anon #sweetheart gives advice

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