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midgardianweasley · 3 years

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Your grace! Bless us with a Natasha x reader where the team is invited to a wedding by a close friend of Tony’s. Then when the bridal bouquet is thrown, the bride throws it too hard where reader accidentally catches it and the team is just going “Oooooh!” And reader is like “I’m not even in a relationship!” But the team know in secret that reader and Natasha have feelings for each other but are too dumb to know. Just funniness and fluff! 🥰😍 (Your writing is brilliant btw!)

I loved this request!! I hope i did it justice <3

it’s a wedding thing

Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader

^idk Nat, you tell me^

Summary: When the Avengers get invited to a close friend of Tony's wedding, what hidden feelings will surface? What relationships will bloom? Who will be the next bride?

Warnings: none!

word count: 4.1k

Message/ask if you want to be added to the taglist!

requests are open loves

“Alright gang, this one’s for all of us, we all listening?”

A cluster of ‘yes’ ‘go on’ ‘come on Tony’ filled the room, everyone eager to hear what the fancy envelope held inside. It was amusing to watch Tony take advantage of everyone’s excitement, slowly peeling the envelope, gasping when he pulled the letter out of the casing slightly, not letting anyone else see what was written on it.

You, Natasha and Wanda all seemed to share a look of amusement at the dramatics and the almost visible frustration coming off of everyone. It was like watching children try to wait patiently for sweets in a shop, almost completely off of their seats. It wasn’t until Tony noticed that Pepper was giving him a warning look, that he, begrudgingly, hurried up and announced what was written on the letter.

“Wow. Caleb’s getting married.” He spoke, eyebrows raised in surprise. “And he’s invited the team.”

“Well, I’m not going.” A voice spoke from the corner of the room, clearly un-amused by what was currently going on.

“Luckily for you, I don’t see ‘reindeer games’ anywhere on the invitation. So you’re off the hook.” He replied with a tight lipped smile, Thor had been visiting recently to see Jane and pay the avengers a visit and wanted to bring Loki to meet her.

‘A pleasant trip’ Thor said.

‘A living hell’ Tony corrected.

It got a laugh out of the team though. Nat and I especially. We’d spent the last couple of nights in each other’s bedrooms, making a list about our favourite moments through the day where Tony and Loki clashed, making stupid insults towards the other. I think it’s safe to say that we went through multiple bags of popcorn over the nights, though you were both thankful it was there, it was the only thing muffling the laughter, if it hadn't, you’re almost certain the entire compound would have woken up at the sound of our laughter.

You nudged Natasha’s side gently, the bicker between the two men still continuing.

“Hey, Nat.” She turned and tilted her head questioningly.

“So we know how a physical fight between those two worked out. But, if they had to compete in a rap battle, who do you think would win?”

Her face immediately lit up, eyes sparkling which only enhanced their beauty, you could almost feel the cogs turning in her head, trying to go through every logical option.

“Well. Loki seems pretty well spoken, so vocabulary wise, I think he’d be strong. But Tony is sarcastic which can help with quick quips. But then again, Loki-”

“Hey lovebirds, Romanoff, Y/L/N” Tony clicked his fingers, earning himself a pair of eyerolls at the term he’d used. “Anything you wanna share with the team, or can we move on?”

“Actually-”

“Overridden. Moving on.”

You looked towards Natasha, snickering slightly at how blunt he’s being, Loki having found his way under his skin again. A part of you felt bad for the man, but that feeling is soon replaced by amusement. It was obvious Nat felt the same way, her sharing the same expression as you, although, you could hide yours much better. She had to physically put her hand over her mouth in the hopes the man wouldn’t notice her.

“So, the wedding is next week, a little short notice but when do we ever have enough notice, who’s in?”

Looking around the room, there were a handful of nods, each looking to see who else was going to go. You looked towards Nat again to see if she was planning on attending, only to find her already staring at you.

“So Y/L/N, up for a wedding?”

“It would be a nice change of pace. Are you going?”

“Only if you are” You blushed slightly at the response.

“Better get your nicest dress on Romanoff.” You winked, her turn to blush and focus back on what the rest of the group was saying.

“It’s probably easy if I list couples first on the RSVP and then the singles.” Tony took a glance around the table, mentally taking note of those who had shown signs of agreement. “So there’ll be Wanda and Vision, Legolas and his wife, Romanoff and Y/L/N, Thor and Jane-” You felt your face morph into one of confusion.

“Woah woah, Tony, back up, what did you say?”

“Thor and Jane, they’re-”

“Before that.”

“I’ve said this before Y/N, Legolas isn’t actually real. I meant Clint.”

“Very funny.” He held a proud smirk. “Romanoff and I aren’t a couple”

You wish.

“That’s not what Rogers said when he saw you both cuddling up on the sofa last night.” Before you had a chance to look in Steve’s direction, you could practically feel the daggers Nat was sending him, making his face cringe slightly and his back straighten.

“That’s what Rogers said, is it?” She spoke, tilting her head in question. You knew she was partly joking, but you’d still decided to intervene before anyone lost any limbs.

“My head fell onto her shoulder when I dozed off during our movie. It wasn’t ‘cuddling’ , thank you very much.” You laughed, internally wishing that Steve’s words were true.

“See? So cut it out.” Steve put his hands up in surrender, despite having a cheeky grin on his face.

“Okay okay. Fine!” The billionaire said, writing something on the envelope. “I’ll just put ‘couple pending’” He muttered

“Stark!”

__________________________

You and the girls had just come back from dress shopping, all three of you had spent the whole day in and out of different shops, hours in dressing rooms and your voices were almost completely gone with how often you were telling each other, ‘that looks stunning’ ‘that’s the one!’ and the most common one by the end of the trip; ‘please just pick a dress so we can go home and nap’. That one was from our very own black widow, her patience wore a little thin after 8 hours of staring at dresses.

You had gone through all the colours and styles while you were out, ranging from classy jumpsuits to figure hugging dresses that felt like a second skin. Wanda and Natasha had chosen their dresses and were eager to find you one, and what a mission that was.

“I promise you, we’re not going home until we find this dress, okay?”

“Wanda’s right. We’ll stay out until they all shut if we have to. But, let’s make that a last resort.” Natasha eyed you both warily.

You’d been walking around for hours now. Each dress you tried on had potential, but there was always something that didn’t sit right with you. It was either too baggy, too tight, the cut wasn’t appealing, the length wasn’t ideal, it was starting to feel hopeless. You’d even suggested just going in your pyjamas, but Wanda’s death glare had made it clear that wasn’t an option.

You and Natasha were both dragging your feet, Wanda still having a slight spring in her step as you walked into the final shop and picking up a couple of dresses before then going into the dressing room to try them on.

The first two were okay, but you weren’t a fan. Then there was the third one. The third one was a gorgeous Y/F/C dress that fell just past your knees, it had thin straps and the skirt was simple and loose so that when you spun around in it, you felt like a princess. You looked in the mirror and you adored the reflection, you still wanted the others opinions though, though you didn’t doubt that they’d feel the same way.

Pulling the curtain back and gaining their attention from where they were looking elsewhere, you smiled when you saw their reaction, more specifically, Natasha’s. Wanda was complimentary, walking up and feeling the fabric, gushing about how beautiful you looked, but you barely heard it, too focused on the redhead sitting in front of you, her eyes glazed over and her jaw almost on the floor, completely zoned out on you.

“This dress is it, Y/N, you have to get it! Nat? What do you think?” Her head shook, bringing herself back to reality and briefly meeting your eyes, only to quickly dart between You, Wanda and your dress in an attempt to compose herself.

“Yeah, I mean, wow, you look- wow.” Her hands flailed in your direction. You’d knocked the assassin speechless. Wanda rolled her eyes playfully at the interaction. She’d known about you and Nat’s feelings for each other for a month or two now, silently cursing the both of you when there was an opportunity to confess, yet never did. It was obvious to the rest of the team, why were neither of you picking up on it?

Keeping quiet, she ushered you back into the changing room, much to Natasha’s relief, both because she wanted to head back to the compound and she wasn’t sure how much longer she would’ve lasted seeing you standing there looking literally flawless. She always thought you looked amazing, but there was something about the way you looked in front of her just then that made her brain feel like a haze.

It was pretty safe to say,

You bought the dress.

Collapsing on your bed, dropping your bags to the side and letting out a loud sigh, you heard your door shut and someone fall into the chair by the window. You already knew who it was.

“I’m exhausted.” The woman groaned, rubbing her hands up and down her face to attempt to physically remove the tiredness from her body.

“Sorry for dragging you around for so long, I just-”

“Hey, no, don’t apologise for that. We all said we’d find the perfect dress, and it was worth the wait.” Heat rose to your cheeks at her words.

“You really think I looked good?”

Natasha could sense your underlying tone of doubt, unsure as to why you would doubt her opinion, she’d always been honest with you. Nonetheless, she heaved herself out of her seat and made her way to the end of the bed, kneeling down so that your now sat up figure could look down into her eyes, with her hands on each side of your face to focus you on her and her alone.

“I wouldn’t lie to you, okay? You looked incredible and I'm sure you’ll look even better at this wedding on Saturday, if that’s even possible.” You let out a small chuckle at her words as a smile made its way onto her face.

“You’ll be the prettiest one there.”

“Better not tell the Bride you said that, Nat.” She laughed, looking down for only a few seconds before looking at you again.

“We’ll make that our secret.” You nodded in silent agreement, grateful that she’d made you feel so reassured.

“Thank you, Tasha.”

“You’re more than welcome, sweetheart.” She replied.

You were so lost in her words, you hadn’t realised how close her face had gotten to yours, and how her eyes swapped between your eyes and your lips. You didn’t realise how she subconsciously had kept edging towards you, hands trembling a little with every inch closer she gets.

She wanted to kiss you. Every nerve in her body was almost electrified with the temptation to just move her lips over yours and become one. Her pulse raced, almost to prepare her for doing so. Which is why she wanted to kick herself with a pair of her highest heels when she uttered her next words.

“We should get some sleep.”

You broke out of your trance, jumping backwards slightly when noticing limited space between you both. You awkwardly coughed as she stood, heading back over to her chair to grab her bag and return to her room.

“Yeah, yeah of course. Big today, rest is probably a good idea.” You both nodded, she was already one foot out of the door when she gave you a small ‘goodnight’ and left, not waiting to hear you say it back.

Just like you hadn’t realised her actions early, you were oblivious to her hitting her head off of the wall in the corridor just outside of your room, wondering why she’d backed away. Where was Thor’s hammer when you needed to knock some sense into yourself? She thought before dragging herself back to her room where she would fall asleep, unable to get you out of her head.

_________________________

“Right! Headcount before we go in! And I want us all on our best behaviour Avengers, this is a wedding” Steve had completely lost you after ‘Headcount’. Not only are most of you fully grown adults, sorry Peter, but he seems to be oblivious to the fact that some of you were wearing high heels, and patience in high heels had an expiry date.

“Y’know, if he doesn’t let us in soon, I’m not afraid to threaten him with his own shield.” You heard a whisper just behind your ear, smirking at the comment.

“I’ll join you.” You answered, Bruce and Clint sharing a knowing look from afar when watching the two of you have your own quiet conversation, though short lived when they saw Natasha’s head move in their direction, their gaze coming to a halt so as to avoid any conflict with their teammate.

You guys could try to hide it all you want, but your entire team knows better than that, they just had to wait it out until you both finally admitted it to the other.

______________________

You and the Avenger’s were currently sitting at a guest table, now in the reception part of the evening. The ceremony was beautiful, the bride wore a crisp white ball gown with her makeup and hair done to perfection, the groom looking like a prince in his black tux and a look full of adoration towards his wife to be painted on his face.

Their looks weren’t the best part of it though. The clothes and the accessories were lovely, of course. But all you could focus on was the love shared between them as they shared their vows telling the other how they believed they were each other's soulmate, and that they promised to always be the other’s rock. You’d found yourself with tears in your eyes, barely able to appreciate the sight with how blurry your vision was now. They finally fell when they said their ‘I do’s’, feeling only happiness for the newlyweds.

Although marriage hadn’t been something you always thought about, you’d hoped that you would meet your special someone and settle down, retire from the missions, the battles, the superhero lifestyle and just be with your soulmate for the rest of your days.

Despite not being a couple, whenever you thought of the person you wanted to spend the rest of your time with, there was only one person that came to mind. And she stood right in front of you throughout the ceremony, comforting a sobbing demi-god while he was also trying to explain to Vision why he was in floods of tears.

Music filled the room, upbeat, but calm enough for the couples on the dancefloor to sway gently to the beat, soft lights occasionally shining on them as they danced, the bride and groom being one of them. You smiled gently at the sight, feeling dreadfully single with all of the love in the room, but grateful that you could see so many people look so content and in love with their significant other.

An elbow could suddenly be felt in your side, pulling you from your thoughts to instead be met with gorgeous green eyes and a bold red smirk.

“Penny for your thoughts?” She leaned in, curiosity clouding her mind.

“Nothing much up there really.” You glanced back at the dance floor quickly. “I’m just happy to see everyone so happy.”

Natasha followed your direction of where you were looking, an idea soon popped into her head. She was going to ask you to dance.

Her mouth opened to speak, but as if it was done on purpose, a ‘screech’ echoed in the ballroom, catching everyone’s attention, including taking yours away from hers.

“We’re taking a break from dancing for a minute folks, It’s time for the bride to throw the bouquet!” He announced, soon followed by shrieks and the sound of feet padding on the wooden floor, women all gathering in a small bunch, huddled together as if their lives depended on it as the men all returned to their seats, shaking their heads at the commotion.

Not really wanting to take part, you turned back around again.

“Sorry Nat, what were you-”

“Y/N!” Your head fell as you were interrupted by a very excited Maximoff.

“Y/N! C’mon! We need to do the bouquet toss!” She started to pull you up, refusing to listen to any excuse you could possibly conjure up to avoid having to take part.

Giving the team a desperate look, hoping someone will help you escape, you’re instead met with encouraging and amused faces, including Natasha’s a clear indication that not a single person was going to help you. Traitor’s.

With a half serious eye roll, you quickly grabbed your glass of champagne and kicked off your heels, heading towards the group of screaming women basically crawling on top of one another when the bride was barely up on the ‘stage’ yet. You let Wanda wander off into the group but remained towards the back, sipping from your glass and sending the occasional sneaky glare towards your table.

“You guys ready?” The bride yelled, only to be met with more screams and a faint chorus of ‘yes’ heard among it as they all threw their hands higher. Wanda saw you were just stood there, and subtly used her powers to raise your hand, earning loud laughs and cheers from the Avengers, taking great joy in the scene unfolding in front of them.

“Okay! Three...Two..”

You kept your arm up, pretending to be enthusiastic about the toss, when you realistically didn’t really expect much from these kinds of traditions. What you definitely hadn’t expected, was for your figure to stumble backwards as you suddenly felt petals and stems in your palm, a faint feeling of silk brushing against your thumb as your fingers wrapped around the item.

You almost spat out your champagne, eyes widening in shock as you looked to see the arrangement of flowers in your grip, looking up to see women both disheartened and elated at your catch. How the hell had you managed that? You were literally the farthest person away, and on your own! You must’ve been set up. Okay, a bit of a stretch, but still!

“WOOO, Y/L/N IS GETTING MARRIED!”

“WHO’S THE LUCKY SOMEONE Y/N?”

“Y/N CAUGHT THE FLOWERS, Y/N CAUGHT THE FLOWERS.”

The bride noticeably laughed at your friend’s cheers, she hadn’t meant to throw it that far back, her arm just kinda went full force, but seeing the reaction it caused, she didn’t regret it. She didn’t even regret it when she saw the look of embarrassment on your face, as it was soon replaced with a contagious beam as you walked towards them again, a very proud Wanda in tow,

“Guys! Guys! I’m not even in a relationship! I highly doubt i’m the next woman in this room to get married.” You joked

“Well, I wouldn’t be so sure.” Sam laughed “Romanoff, you got an engagement ring handy?” He yelped as a peanut from the centre of the table was thrown at him, and of course with being a trained assassin, Nat had hit him right in the centre of his forehead, earning a dramatic noise of pain to leave his mouth.

These guys will be the death of you.

__________________

After some teasing, the room had filled once again with happy couples dancing, now including some you were very familiar with, one being a genius billionaire playboy philanthropist and his CEO wife, and another being an Asgardian with his Midgardian girlfriend, both gently moving side to side in time with the music.

Letting out a content sigh, you were met once again with the flowers, however, this time, they weren’t on the table, but were held by a gorgeous woman in a flawless navy dress.

“So, I know we aren’t a couple, but, would the future bride like to dance?” She asked, you let out a content sigh, pretending to think it over for a minute.

“Y’know what, I would, thank you for your kind offer.” You took the hand she’d held out for you and led you to the dance floor. While her hands went to your waist, gently tugging you closer, your arms went around her neck, hands interlocking behind her as you, like the others you’d admired all even, swayed.

You’re unsure when it happened, much like a time before, but your head had made its way onto your dance partner's shoulder, your body following suit as it left no room between the two of you, though you weren’t complaining. Neither was the fellow Avenger.

It was peaceful for a period of time, the only sound being the slow music and a quiet chatter of people across the floor. It wasn’t long before you heard the red head above you whisper in your ear once again.

“You really do look amazing tonight, Y/N.” You raised your head so it was directly opposite hers, sending her an appreciative gaze.

“That future fiance of yours is lucky.” She winked.

“Hilarious” You scoffed, fully aware of her humorous tone.

“I know, sometimes I amaze even myself with my jokes.”

“Well, it really is funny, because I honestly don’t see myself getting married anytime soon.” Nat’s eyebrows raised in what could almost be described as confusion.

“And why is that? Do you not want to get married?” Her hands started grazing up and down your waist, like she was comforting you, but really she was bracing herself for what was incoming.

“No, no it’s not that. I just..”

“Just?”

“I don’t think the person i’m interested in, is necessarily interested in me.” Her heart dropped. So you did have someone of interest. She pushed the sinking feeling to the side quickly so that she could respond.

“Right, and why is that?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never seen them make a move. I thought it’d be obvious. I think it has been to some others.” Your eyes wandered, lingering for longer than what was probably appropriate, on Natasha’s plump lips, wondering if you’d ever get to experience what it’d be like to feel them on yours.

This time, Natasha didn’t miss it. She would’ve blamed it on alcohol, saying that she must’ve just imagined it, but she had only consumed a few drops all evening, being too entranced by you didn’t leave much room for hydration. She hadn’t been more thankful, because it made a light bulb go off in her head as the pieces came together in her head of who you were referring to. She didn’t make a move the other night. It was obvious to the team. How could she have been so blind?

You didn’t see it coming, even when your chin was held in her grasp and you saw her face leaning in towards yours, the reality only hitting you when you finally felt what you’d been wanting to feel for the last months, right now. Your surroundings had just disappeared, the only thing that was running through your head, was the way her lips were moving against yours, and the way her lips tasted faintly of vanilla, and how she smelled like her floral perfume she wore for special occasions.

Whooping and cheering brought you both back from your bubble with just the two of you, your head falling just below her chin, her hand stroking your back as you could feel her chuckle bubbling where your head lay. Well, hid. Her arms had muffled their comments, but you had an idea of what they were, probably a mixture of ‘finally!’, ‘i knew it!’ and you’re almost certain you heard a ‘You owe me 20 bucks.’, that one making you shake your head.

Remaining in your hiding spot, that wasn’t very well hidden, but was keeping your bright red face to yourself, a pair of familiar lips lingered right beside your head.

“So, about that bouquet..”

You weren’t getting married, but by the end of the night, you definitely didn’t feel so dreadfully single as you had earlier.

taglist: @the-dumbass-that-throws-knives

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swordgayist · 3 years

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cultural appropriation in ATLA (hinduism edition)

i’m sure there’s already a ton of posts about this, but whatever, i’m still making one idc.

ATLA’s cultural appropriation, everyone knows about it, the white people don’t speak about it, and the asian and indigenous people get ignored. we know the cycle. but i wanted to come here and highlight some of the most prominent examples of ATLA abusing hinduism, as i am kinda sorta hindu (i was raised in a hindu household, i go to chinmaya mission, that kinda shit). i might forget some things so keep that in mind.

this is gonna be divided into 3 main sections, since there are different ways that they disrespect hinduism that i don’t wanna lump together.

and i’d say i know a lot about hinduism but that doesn’t make me an expert, obviously, so if other hindus have anything to add and/or correct then please do !! and if anyone else wants to share how their cultures were appropriated then please do that as well !!

so let’s get started shall we?

appropriating hinduism

1) the avatar

we’ll start with the most obvious example: the avatar itself

i know that there are parts of the avatar mythos that are taken from other cultures as well but the idea of the avatar itself is primarily from hinduism.

basically in hinduism, the term dashavatara refers to the 10 reincarnations of lord vishnu (the god of preservation), with avatar(a) meaning form or incarnation in sanskrit, and das(a) meaning ten. it was said that whenever the world was out of balance, lord vishnu would come down to earth in a certain form to restore balance. Each reincarnation is considered a different life with a different story. the avatars of lord vishnu are often considered the saviors of the world.

so basically, the central idea of the show and the actual name of the show is largely based on hinduism.

2) chakras

many different indian religions have a concept of chakras (chakra meaning wheel or circle in sanskrit), but hinduism is the one that primarily preaches the system of seven chakras, the version used in ATLA.

chakras connect the physical body to the ‘subtle’ body (referring more to the spirit and the psyche) by connecting parts of the body to aspects of the mind. the idea is that through different forms of steady meditation you can manipulate the different chakras and allow the pure flow of energy through the body.

the whole idea of chakras on ATLA is that aang has to unblock them all to let the cosmic energy flow through him so that he can go into the avatar state at will. so yeah, pretty much that whole idea was taken from hinduism.

3) terminologies

these are just a few terms that were taken from hinduism. i’m pretty sure there are more that i can’t think of right now but yeah.

“agni” kai

i’ll be honest i don’t know where the ‘kai’ part is from, i don’t think it’s from hinduism but if it is well fuck me i guess. ‘agni’ in hinduism is the god of fire, so the creators used it in ‘agni kai’, the name for a firebending duel.

“bumi”

this is in reference to the hindu word for ‘earth’, which is bhoomi. this is also in reference to our goddess of earth, bhoomi devi. also this doesn’t really bother me but i wonder if the creators knew that bhoomi is a name typically used for women (as are most hindi names ending in ‘i’/‘ee’).

in general, concepts like having multiple complex gods (the spirits) who are capable of good and evil and the reincarnation cycle are prominent in a lot of asian cultures, including (and arguably primarily) hinduism.

mocking hinduism

now we get into the mockery of hinduism in ATLA, because it is very much there.

1) whoever the fuck that baboon guy in the spirit world was

now what the fuck was this.

i mean i wouldn’t say this is the most egregious example of them making fun of brown people but lord why did this even need to be there? this random guy from the spirit world has an indian accent ? and is fervently chanting ‘om’ for some reason, and it’s clearly meant to be seen as comical. also portraying brown people as monkeys....... really.

2) combustion man/sparky sparky boom man

when rewatching ATLA in 2019 i actually had no idea that this was a thing, because the last time i had watched it was as a kid and i didn’t finish it.

so lord was i in for a surprise when i saw...

now... now what.

if you didn’t know, combustion man’s ‘third eye’ is designed to replicate the hindu god of destruction, lord shiva. right down to the vibhuti on his forehead (referring to the three line markings around the third eye).

in hinduism, lord shiva’s third eye is used to reduce people to ashes, though as far as i can recall, not very frequently. the primary significance of the third eye is that it represents the ability of higher spiritual thought and higher consciousness.

the ATLA writers take the ACTUAL significance of the third eye, throw it out the window, and then take its destructive abilities to make a super duper cool and dangerous new firebending technique.

and if that wasn’t bad enough, the actual person who uses this technique, and is meant to emulate a GOD who is PRAISED, is a scary, burly, half metal man who is a villain and an assassin. not to mention the design of his facial hair replicates that super duper scary “terrorist” depiction of brown people, particularly of muslims, that white people are so thoroughly terrified of for no reason.

this is a parody of a god, and they portrayed him as this terrifying, maniacal fucking assassin who, along with p’li, the combustion bender from LOK, is constantly referred to as a “third-eyed freak”. i’ve made this analogy before and i’ll do it again, this is like making jesus into a hitman.

now onto my favorite example...

3) guru pathik

ah, this motherfucker.

i don’t really have any problems with him as a character, i mean hell, must’ve taken a fuck ton of patience to handle aang’s “why would choose cosmic energy over katara” bullshit.

but we all know it, we see it plain as day, don’t even try to deny it.

“guru” literally just means teacher or guide, so i don’t really know why pathik needed to be referred to as “guru” so distinctively from aang’s other teachers and guides, but that’s just extremely trivial compared to all the other issues with this character.

first of all what is this character design? what is he even wearing? if they’re trying to replicate the clothes of swamis and priests and stuff this is already wrong, realized people don’t dress like this. and why the fuck does he have an indian accent? and why was this indian accent done by a non indian (brian george)?

once again, the poor but extremely heavy indian accent is clearly meant to be mocking, if it wasn’t, they wouldn’t’ve gone out of their way to get a non indian person to DO an indian accent, and instead they would’ve just gotten an actual indian person to play the role.

and oh yeah, the onion and banana juice. because hindus just eat weird shit right.

whether it’s actually weird or not, the show certainly portrays it as weird. and as far as i know no hindu actually fucking drinks onion and banana juice.

ironic because brown people can absolutely destroy white people in cooking. but i digress.

i know what you’re all waiting for. because the guru apparently didn’t have enough fun with guru pathik, so they just had to come back to him in book 3:

where do i begin.

so this is obviously john o’bryan’s super funny and hilarious depiction of pathik as a hindu god.

usually when a god has multiple arms it’s to carry an array of things, from flowers to weapons to instruments, and one hand is typically free to bless devotees (ie. goddess durga and lord vishnu respectively):

but of course white people see this as weird and so they make fun of it, hence guru pathik having multiple arms just flailing about aimlessly (save for the two that are being used to carry the aforementioned onion and banana juice).

then there’s the whole light behind pathik’s head which is usually depicted in drawings of hindu gods to show that they are celestial.

also what the fuck is he holding? is that supposed to be a veena? because this is what a veena looks like:

and i assume the reason this was added was to mock the design of goddess saraswathi, who carries a veena:

but that right there in the picture of pathik looks more like a tambura than a veena.

and it also just kinda looks like a banjo?

but i guess the animators just searched up “long indian instrument” and slapped it on there. actually no, that’s giving them too much credit, they probably didn’t search it up at all.

and then the actual scene is pathik singing crazily about chakras tasting good or something while playing the non-veena and it’s all supposed to be some funky crazy hallucination that aang is having due to sleep deprivation. just some crazy dream, just as crazy as talking appa and momo sparring with swords or tree-ozai coming to life.

our gurus and swamis and sadhus and generally realized people are very respected in hinduism, they’re people we look up to and honor very much. and our GODS are beings that we literally worship. and the writers just take both and make caricatures out of them for other white people to laugh at.

4) other shit

before we move to the next portion i just wanna mention there are also smaller backhanded jabs that i can’t really remember now, but one example was when zuko was all “we’ll be sure to remember that, guru goody goody”. or when a character would meditate and say “om” only when the meditation is supposed to be portrayed as comical or pointless. or in bitter work when sokka was rambling on about karma. small things like that. but moving on.

south asian representation, or lack thereof

now i finally get to the “losing” hinduism part. by this i mean the lack of actual representation there is of south asians (the region where hinduism is primarily practiced) despite the fact that hinduism plays such a big role in the show’s world design.

i think it’s safe to say that broadly the main cast consists of aang, katara, sokka, zuko, toph, azula, iroh, mai, ty lee, and suki.

a grand total of none of these characters are south asian. the writers don’t even attempt to add any south asian main characters.

there are characters with dark skin, like haru and jet, but a) they’re not confirmed to be south asian and don’t have any south asian features or south asian names, b) they’re side characters, so they don’t count as representation, and c) even if they were south asian and main characters, jet wouldn’t even count because he’s portrayed as a terrorist.

the ONLY truly south asian character we get is fucking guru pathik. so yeah. not representation.

i don’t get how the creators of this show rip off of hinduism (among many other south asian cultures they rip off of), mock indians, and then don’t even have the decency to HAVE a main character who is south asian.

i’ve never gotten a chance to compile all this, and this definitely isn’t all the creators have done, but i hope this was somewhat informative.

#atla #cultural appropriation #hinduism #guru pathik #combustion man #chakras #avatar

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not-me-simping-for-blasty · 3 years

Text

shit-head!bakugou hcs

*the following is a varied but not in any way exhaustive list of all the shit bakugou pulls on the daily when ur his s/o

-okay, so to start, let’s get one thing straight: bakugou likes when you yell at him. he does. he thinks it’s funny when you’re annoyed and pretty damn hot when you’re pissed at him, so he spends all day, every day, trying to needle a reaction out of you. bc he’s a hot-head with a mischevious streak n absolutely no impulse control when it comes to you. obviously.

-alright so, he probably pulls your hair to get your attention. not, like, hard or anything, it doesn’t hurt, but you’d still 100% prefer if he maybe just didn’t

-bakugou moves your things when you’re not looking,, not very far or in difficult to find places, but he’ll still do it just to be annoying. laughs under his breath every single time you yell at him for it

-will occasionally come up and hug you from behind. it’s very unusual for him so ur ‘???’ about it at first. then he’s nuzzling and kissing ur neck softly so you just kinda accept it and melt into being 🥰 about it. then he bites. not a cute bite, not a sexy bite, literally just chomps down and bites. u squeal/squirm bc obviously. he just laughs at the reaction he wanted and then leaves the room entirely. without apologizing or saying anything bc he’s an asshole

-ruffles your hair after you’ve just done it

-will pluck your phone out of your hands. not for any reason, he’ll just walk by and snatch it,,, probably does so for the entire reason of wanting you to yell at him

-intentionally mispronounces your name when he introduces you to people he finds unimportant. bakugou just thinks the look on your face is funny,,, n he doesn’t give a shit bc the person is beneath him and that means they don’t deserve to know your real name anyways

-if y’all are at a social gathering and he doesn’t want to be there anymore, he’ll start saying his goodbyes almost immeadiately. then he’ll go around and say your goodbyes for you, so when he’s pulling you out the door nobody says anything about your sudden exit

-will chug your entire drink while your turned around. probably says some “wow. should probably fill this up, idiot.” while holding up the glass with a shit-eating grin

-picks you up. just sweeps your feet out from under you just to place you back down. idk he likes chaos n there’s nothing more chaotic then ur flailing limbs and squawking when he does so

-if you’re in your bedroom reading when bakugou wants to go to bed, he’ll turn the lights off regardless of what you’re doing. if you complain and get up to turn them on again, he’ll leave them on and won’t do anything else or even complain,,, but most times you don’t want to get up, don’t want to make the effort so you just leave them off. bakugou knows this. it’s why he turns them off in the first place.

-if you’re laying on the couch, taking up all the room, and bakugou wants to sit, he won’t lift your feet into his lap. no, he’ll just sit on them. will just sit on them until you give up your yelling and move to make room for him

-when he’s bored he likes to bicker for entertainment. so whatever you’re doing at the time he’ll just attack sayin sum like “jesus, don’t you know how fucking stupid that is? i’d never do that.” n ur just like, watching tv pls kill him he’s so annoying

-will fling hairbands/scrunchies at you while you’re doing your nightly routine. does this bc, in his eyes, you’re taking too long and bakugou just wants to go to sleep

-complains when u wear clothes he doesn’t like the feel of. like, if it feels itchy/scratchy against his skin when he hugs u, bakugou will let you know how much he dislikes it. loudly

-offers you food just to pull his plate away when you reach for it ,, then sits there saying “god, i really am the best fuckin chef. this shit’s delicious. woulda shared too, but it didn’t seem like you wanted it enough.” ,, all said while smirking ofc

-when you hug he’ll intentionally breathe against the shell of your ear. does this so he can make fun of you when you shiver/squirm

-says shit like “hey, i had the best fuckin’ dream last night.” n u go ‘??? what was it?’ n bakugou will look you dead in the eyes, straight-faced n just go “you went mute. shit was paradise.” ,,, 🙄 give him the silent treatment after babes, he’ll be whining and bitching and taking it back by hour 2

-will lay directly on top of you if he doesn’t want you to leave the bed in the morning. will just flop, dead-weight onto you until you stop struggling. then he’ll make fun of you if you fall asleep again. bc he’s a dick.

-he won’t eat your food, but he’ll act like he did. so you’ll get home from work, and u’ve been thinking about your leftover take out all day, right, n bakugou will sneak up behind you while you’re searching for the food in the fridge. he’ll push the fridge closed with a hand near your head n lean in to say some “don’t bother. ate it already, dumbass. wasn’t great.” against ur ear. pls when you turn around pissed at him he’ll just laugh, push you away from the fridge and take out the food and hand it to you. he never ate it. he never does. he just likes when you think he did and yell at him for it

-keeps a running list, in his phone, of words you’ve misused/mispronounced. will recite all of them at you just because he can

-kicks at the back of your knees. he’ll never let you fall, will always, always catch you, but he likes to do it anyways. bc katsuki is a child

-changes the tv channel right when your show comes back on for commerical. somehow keeps a perfectly straight face the entire time you’re screaming at him

-unties your shoes/unzips your jacket/takes your glasses off your face damn near constantly. he thinks he’s funny. he isn’t.

-if bakugou decides that you’re not paying enough attention to him, he won’t say anything. won’t say anything at all but will just sit there and clear his throat obnoxiously. then you’re like “can i help you with something?” n he’ll just turn his head and “no. i don’t need shit from you.” (he does, pls talk to him or hug him or something bc he won’t stop until u catch on)

-if he’s tired he will tell you. loudly. constantly. opens his mouth to say the same “i’m fuckin’ tired.” shit every 30 seconds until you finish up whatever you’re doing and go to bed with him

-if his hands/feet are cold, he’ll put them on you. bc he thinks it’s funny when you squirm

-if there’s an opening for a joke he’ll say it. every single time. never lets you breathe for a second without roasting you. ofc then he’ll try and gather u into a hug n say some “no, don’t get mad, dummy. i had to fuckin’ say it! you walked into it!” ,,, don’t hug him. shrug him off bc he deserves it

-is a backseat driver. now bakugou cannot drive for shit without evolving into a vibrating mess of poor judgment and road rage, but he doesn’t let that stop him from opening his mouth when you’re driving

-smacks your ass every chance he gets. mans never lets an opportunity pass him by

-don’t ask him to get you anything. ever. bc he won’t hand it to you politely. he will kick it to you, chuck it at you, or drop it directly on you from a ridiculous height,,, ofc he warns you so you can catch it and not get hurt, but still

-will unironically comment and critique your teeth brushing habits,, all while his gums are literally bleeding from constant abuse

-pretends he’s deaf when you tell him to do things. that’s it. that’s the concept.

-steals the blanket right off your lap. wraps its around himself with a “oh. didn’t look like you were fuckin’ using it.” ,,, ofc u know this is just a ploy. a terrible ploy to get you to cuddle with him for warmth, bc god forbid he just ask, but it’s still annoying. doesn’t stop him from doing it again though

so, in conclusion, no one will ever believe you when you try to tell them what a little shit he is. especially not since he’s only ever an outright asshole or entirely aloof around others

pls idk what this is but i absolutely couldnt stop thinking about it

#bnha bakugou #bakugou katsuki #katsuki bakugou #bnha bakugo katsuki #bnha fic #mha bakugou #bakugou x reader #bakugou x y/n #bakugou headcanons #bakugou hcs

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whaleofatjme1920 · 2 years

Note

I am BEGGING YOU! In your crack creepypasta fanfic pls include a part where the reader goes up to the roof of the mansion and starts singing fight song and doing ballet and all the pastas hear it

Creepy pasta x reader part?? Idk I’m so RANDOM XD 🕴

I don’t understand why Jane is so jealous of my relationship with Jeff. i don’t even LIKE him that way. He’s not my type. Ok maybe he is kinda cute when he smiles BUT THATS BESIDES THE POINT BAKA.

She’s so mean and for what?? Like I could be having a tea party with Sally and LJ were having a fun time eating cookies Masky made (his pink apron is so cute and I think I saw Hoodie kiss his cheek!!) and she just comes in and ruins all the fun. I don’t get it. Sally always says she’s been much moodier since I came in and I think she’s just jealous of le Moi? 😳

Idk what she’d like about me I’m not a blonde preppy popular girl I’m a girl that listens to emo music and is random with mean parents. They sold me here?! But it’s actually not that bad. Slender Man usually asks me to call him father or dad, because that’s what everyone else calls him.

It felt weird at first lol but I can confidently say waking up in the morning after a long night of killing people and having fun with Toby and EJ hearing him vacuum and see him read the paper with his faceless face is pretty funny and dad like.

We’re gonna have a Halloween party!! Obviously Halloween is a big thing in the mansion. The entire family gets together. We even mange to corral mr Widemouth!!! He’s so mean to sallly though 🙄

I’m sitting on the couch with Ben and we’re playing Mario kart while EJ, LJ and Jeff hang up some streamers. I wonder if we’re gonna have any adult apple juice 😳

“BRO let me win!!” Ben cries out as he whips the controller at the tv.

I laugh and shake my head. “No way! I won fair and square” I say as I cross my arms and playfully stick out my tongue.

Masky hisses. “BENJAMIN WE ARE NOT REPLACING IT IF U BREAK IT AGAIN!!” He yells like an angry mama bear.

I cackle and toggle my way back to the menu. “Another round gamer boy??” I ask as Sally sits between us and happily watches.

Ban nods. “You’re on.” He grins. He starts wildly flailing and I do too.

“You’re such a baka!” I scream as he sends a blue shell my way. I watch in horror as all the racers pass me up Ben included. (an: I would DESTROY Ben in Mario kart I USE LE BANANA PEELS WITH SCARY ACCURACY WHHHHHHA)

He’s laughing and I’m laughing and some people in the house are watching us play. Jason has his forearms rested on the couch EJ has a small smile on his face while he munches on a kidney and Hoodie is smilin while eating some cheesecake >-<.

We’re having so much fun and then miss buzzkill herself walks down the stairs. Jane looks so angry as she huffs at us.

“Will you two please shut up? I’m trying to sharpen my weapons and you take are being so d*mn loud!” She’s glaring daggers at us and her lips are pouting. Ugh I hate her makeup she looks like she tries way too hard.

I roll my (e/c) orbs. “Lighten up” I say.

“You’re so rude” she says back.

“Jane” EJ says. “They’re having fun.”

“It’s literally so fricking annoying” she says as she walks up to the tv. She bends down and turns it off making me and Ben groan loudly.

“Jane why are you being so mean to me?” I ask as I stomp up to her as the rest of the pastas move around the mansion give us space.

“I think you’re stupid” she says. Jane crosses her arms over her chest. “You clearly want to take Jeff from me.”

I scoff and flip my long shimmery (h/c) hair and flicker my (e/c) orbs wildly. “Uh no I don’t??” I reply.

Jane scoffs and slaps me! “Stop lying!”

I cry out and feel the red mark forming on my pale cheeks. I feel like I’m speechless! None of the other pastas say anything as I begin to cry and run away. I trip up the stairs before scurrying into my room. I throw the door open and reach for my iPod before running to the rooftop (an: uh pretend that the proxies gave u a magic key to open the roof!).

I shiver a little bit due to the autumn air but turn on my favorite song called “Fight Song”

The music plays and I can’t help but sing and cry and dance. My parents hated me but they wanted me to be their little overachiever so they enrolled my in ballet in a young age. I’ve never been an athlete but I do know how to dance.

“And all those things I didn't say

Wrecking balls inside my brain

I will scream them loud tonight

Can you hear my voice this time?”

I do a few flips and jumps up on the roof not even noticing how on the front lawn everyone is crowded around watching me dance and listening to me sing. Small smiles are on their faces.

Sally is dancing with smile dog and Slender looks proud of me!

“This is my fight song

Take back my life song

Prove I'm alright song

My power's turned on

Starting right now I'll be strong (I'll be strong)

I'll play my fight song

And I don't really care if nobody else believes

'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me”

I do a few dramatic flares and jumps as I extend my legs before looking over the edge at all the pastas. They’re smiling, cheering, sjnging with me except for Jane who looks more p*ssed off than ever.

I feel happy tears in my eyes as I wave down to everyone.

“Know I've still got a lot of fight left in me” I sing loudly with all my emotion letting out years of pain from my parents and bullied at school and Jane. Everyone on the lawn erupts into cheers and loud applause at my talent. Some are even whistling and Bloody Painter throws a rose up at me.

Jane looks so jealous.

#it pains me to write this #WhaleOfATjme’s bad Creepypasta fanfic #Creepypasta meme #Creepypasta #Creepypasta x reader #these are literally never stopping #ticci Toby #jane the killer #Ben drowned

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otakusheep15 · 3 years

Text

SFW Alphabet - Mammon

I really wanted to write one for Mammon, but I was stuck on a few letters until just now lol.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

At first, his tsundere-self won’t let him show much affection towards you. However, as your relationship develops, you begin finding random trinkets and things around your room and in your pockets. These all come from him, who just randomly buy you things he thinks you might enjoy. The second you show interest in anything, even slightly, it’s yours. Eventually, he’ll open up a bit more and start showing more verbal and physically affection, but gift giving is his main love language.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

You are constantly getting dragged into every single thing he does. He has a new scheme, you’ll be his partner-in-crime. Lucifer is planning on punishing him again, You’ll be right next to him getting punished as well. he’ll also bring you with him when he gambles or goes clubbing. You can either choose to keep him out of trouble, or encourage his wild behavior cause he’d listen to you regardless.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

He is an absolute slut for cuddles. Will he get embarrassed at the close proximity? Yes. Will he act like a typical tsundere because of it? Yes. Will he still love it regardless, and make sure you know he loves it? Yes. His ideal position would be you two facing each other, wrapped up in each others embrace. He loves it when you pat his head cause it makes him feel appreciated and loved. He’ll also lay his head on your chest and just listen to your heartbeat.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He knew he wanted to settle down with you pretty much the second he realized his feelings. While he isn’t very good at household chores, he’ll try his best just for you. After all, you’re his human, and he would never make you do all of the work yourself.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

He’d be the type to dwell on it for a while and make sure it’s actually what he wants. Usually, he would sit down with them and try and talk about it. From there, it will either be perfectly civil and no one gets too hurt, or it ends in a giant fight including yelling, throwing things, and even physical violence at some points. It all depends on the person and what their relationship was like.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

He wants to get married to you as soon as possible. As the Avatar of Greed, he wants you all to himself, and what better way to claim you than by marrying you. If you are a bit more hesitant to the idea, he’ll wait for as long as you want, but he hopes that you’ll want to at some point.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

He is probably the most gentle out of all of the brothers. He’s your first man, and he promised to protect you from anything that could cause you harm. He knows that, as a demon, he could also be the one to cause you harm, even if accidentally. This is why he treats you like the most valuable treasure in all of the three worlds. Literally, it almost becomes a problem at some points because he will not let you do anything he deems remotely dangerous. If he could, he would just simply lock you up in his room forever to just keep you safe (not in a yandere way or anything, he just can’t bear the thought of you getting hurt cause he wasn’t there for you).

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Hugs are one of his favorite forms of affection. He’s especially into the idea of hugging you in public since it lets others know who you belong to. His hugs are very possessive, but they feel really nice. If he’s had a particularly bad day, he’ll come into your room and just sit there and hug you for hours. Please give him soft, loving words and pet his head. It will make him feel so loved and happy in that moment.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

In all honesty, the first time he says it will probably by a total accident. It would just slip out in the middle of a conversation one day. Chances are, you two aren’t even dating when he first says it. He’d get all flustered and try to pretend like he didn’t say it, but you know he’s clearly lying. After flailing about for a while, he’d calm down and mutter something about how he hopes you feel the same way.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

He could rival Levi for the title of Avatar of Envy. Maybe it’s a side-effect of his greed, but he will get super jealous the second anyone goes near you. WHen he’s jealous, it’s very obvious. Most of the time, he’ll just come up behind you and hug you/kiss you just to show that you’re his. And, depending on the person, he might just drag you away from them entirely. Afterwards, he’ll be super pouty and demands you give him attention to make up for it.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

His kisses are usually very excited and passionate. Basically, he wants to show you how much he loves you through his kisses since he has a hard time actually saying what he feels. His favorite place to kiss you is on your cheek. He just thinks it’s cute. He likes being kissed on his forehead or on the top of his head. It just gives him some comfort.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

He’ll claim that he hates children, but everyone knows that’s a lie. In reality, he really likes kids. He thinks they’re cute. However, kids don’t like him all that much, which is why he’s so bad with them. They never listen to him, and he does not know how to control them.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

You’ll usually be waking up first, and you’ll also be waking him up. He is a child who will beg for five more minutes, but don’t give in cause then he’ll never get up. Most likely, you’ll have to drag him out of bed and offer some kind of reward for him. On the days you two can sleep in, he’ll try and keep you there for as long as possible. You two have nothing to do? He’ll somehow convince you to just stay in bed with him all morning.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Nights are a bit of a wildcard for him. Sometimes he’ll be out late gambling or getting punished by Lucifer, and you’ll obviously be there with him. On nights when he’s not doing anything, you two will be in his room or yours just laying in bed. Maybe you’ll watch a movie, maybe you’ll just sit and talk, who knows? It usually ends with him falling asleep first and you following shortly after.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

He’s accidentally open pretty early on. He doesn’t mean to open up as quickly or easily as he does, but he can’t help it. Being with you just makes it so easy for him to relax, and then he’s suddenly spilling his whole life story.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He has so much patience, especially with you. It does not matter what you’re doing, he will sit there and wait forever. The only time he isn’t patient is when money is involved or someone is threatening you. In these cases, he snaps quicker than even Lucifer or Satan.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He pretends to remember nothing, but he actually has a great memory. He’ll remember literally every detail you tell him. His tsundere attitude gets in the way of him actually saying how much he cares, but his memory and attention to detail proves it just as well. It could be the smallest detail about this one time in your childhood, and he’d still remember the entire story as if he experienced it.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

His favorite moment was this one time where you two got in trouble with Lucifer again. You two had managed to run away from him, but y’all knew you needed to hide and quick. Eventually, you found a small closet in the house that could just barely fit the both of you. Lucifer passes on and it’s safe for now. For some reason that neither of you remembers, you two just start laughing. At first it’s small giggles, but soon it’s full on cackling. The situation was just so funny in that moment. He remembers seeing the look of pure joy and excitement on your face, and he knew from that moment on that he wanted to be with you forever.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He is the most protective guard dog you will ever have. He’ll play it off as just having been given the assignment by Lucifer, but we all know he just loves you. The second someone comes near you, he will attack them. He’s probably also bitten someone at least once. There are some points where not even his brothers can get near you.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Boy tries so hard but they always end up in disaster. He really wants to impress you and show you how much he cares, but nothing ever works for him. In the end, you two just end up doing something simple like going out to dinner or watching a movie. It’s not what he intended, but it makes you happy, so he’s cool with it.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

He steals from you. A lot. Once you start dating, he claims all of your stuff as his. You’ll often find things missing from your room, mostly things like clothes or trinkets.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

He’s a model, so obviously he puts a lot of effort into how he looks. Trust me, he is nowhere near as bad as Asmo, but it’s still more than normal. He wants to look good cause he believes that’s how he gets people to like him. Really, he’s just insecure that people won’t like him if he doesn’t look good.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Oh most definitely. You made the most impact on him. If you were to leave him, he would absolutely fall apart. Like, no one would ever hear from him again if something took you away from him.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

I headcanon that he actually kinda tolerates his brother’s tormenting because that’s the only attention they really give him. He seems very starved for attention, and before you, he only really had his brothers. But they usually ignore him for the most part. So, he purposely gets on their nerves so that they’ll pay him some attention. Sure, it mostly consists of them yelling at him and calling him a scummy excuse of a brother, but it’s better than nothing. Then you came along and gave him some good, loving attention, and that’s when he realized he deserved so much more than what he took from his brothers.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

He would not like someone who acts like his brothers. By that, I mean he wants someone who won’t bully him in the same way his brothers do. He wants a safe place, and he wants someone who can provide that for him, not someone who’ll just make him feel worse.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

He snores. And moves a lot. You have fallen out of bed many times when sleeping together. He also steals all of the covers. He’ll apologize the next morning, but then do it again that night.

#OBEY ME #shall we date obey me #shall we date mammon #headcanon #sfw alphabet

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mugimugitmnt · 3 years

Note

No worries. :) And thank you so much! :D Would it be alright if I asked for the Bayverse boys sharing their very first kiss with a female S/O, please? Headcanon or one-shots style, completely your choice. Bonus if they're super awkward and funny cause of their inexperience but if that's not your cup of tea, can be however. ;) Thanks so very much. :D

Very first kiss! (BayVerse)

I really tried to make some of these funny but I couldn’t hold back the cute moments lol hope you like!!

Fem & g/n reader

—————

Leonardo

Leo made his way into the living room portion of the lair, straighten up when he saw your sitting on the couch, your back to him.

“Hey, what’re you up to,” you felt Leo’s broad presence behind you, “what book is that?”

“Just some book I picked up at a yard sale. Look. The owner wrote notes.” Your fingers traced over the tiny letters written in pencil. Leo leaned over the couch you sat on, smiling knowingly to himself. He too is a fan of the practice of marginalia.

But Leo eyes quickly drifted to the tips of your fingers, the soft pink skin and neatly filed nails. He eyed the bracelet around your wrist, taking advantage of this calm moment you were distracted reading to take in the finer details he never got close enough to see.

You turned the page, the crinkle of the paper making Leo turn back to the book, leaning closer, his head over your shoulder. You felt the rising warmth in your face, he was so /close/. You could feel his gentle breathing on the hairs around your ear.

“Look at that one,” Leo pointed to a small note at the bottom of the new page. It was a heart with a little arrow going through it, two initials with a plus sign in the middle, with the date under it- 06.18.1988

The both of you smiled, and you couldn’t help but wonder if this was the marking of a now older couple.

You turned to look at Leo, only to go wide eyed when you realized his head was already turned towards you.

Faces inches apart, Leo sucked in his breath before pressing his lips onto yours. Frozen for a few moments, your hand slowly came up to cradle his cheek, smiling softly as you felt him melt onto your palm.

You were still, non moving, eyes lightly shut as Leo pulled away, a soft pop sounding from where his lips felt yours.

“Sorry,” Leo mumbled.

“No no... I liked it,” Your hand fell back onto the couch, patting the spot next to you, “sit with me?”

“Yeah, just...just gimme a minute.” Leo nodded, releasing a shaky breath, he didn’t want you to see how weak and shaky you had left his knees.

Raphael

“Raaaph,” you dragged out your words in annoyance, “ I’m so bored!”

You lay flat on the floor next to weight bench, pulling on the hanging red bandana tails that swayed with every bench press Raph did.

Raph grunted, pushing the heavy bar upwards, “then do sumthing.”

“Oh geez yeah that helped,” you rolled your eyes, knowing Raph couldn’t see your face. You watched him do his bench sets, the sweat rolling down in beads around his forehead and forearms. He was steady with it, a smooth up and down motion, his rough breathing and the slight brushing of the manholes as weights brushing against each other sounded through the room.

You sat up, running your fingers through your hair, a stupid, stupid idea making it’s turn through your mind. Maybe not so stupid, but dumb nonetheless.

You crawled over to where Raph continued to lift his weights. Popping up behind him, you leaned over him, hands on either side of his face, in a sideways Spider-Man kiss, daring to swipe your tongue across the underside of his top lip.

You continued to nimbly lick and tease his lips in kisses, until you heard the manhole weight covers jiggling profusely. You jerked your head back as Raphs arms began to shake like a newborn deer.

“Oh fuck... help,” Raph hissed, he could already hear Leo scolding him for not having a spotter. But how was he supposed to stay collected after /that!/

His hands were sweaty and his dirty little brain was firing signals to the wrong head.

You grabbed the bar with both hands, as if that would do anything. Only in your wildest dreams would you have the strength to help Raph lift literally 50 manhole covers.

“Leo! Donnie! HELP!”

Donatello

“Cereal is a soup,” you said, twirling in the desk chair next to Donnie. He momentarily stopped the tiny welding job infront of him, pulling his goggles to the top of his head.

“No,” he scoffed, “I dare say it’s not.”

You pursed your lips as to not laugh, “yeah you’re right. It’s actually a salad. Milk is the dressing.”

“I’m going to throw this battery at you if you don’t sto-“

“Pop tarts are ravioli.” You smiled smugly, watching his face go through the five stages is grief.

“Now that’s just disrespectful!” Donnie stood from his chair, and you kicked back bursting into a laugh as he made his way towards you.

“Corn dogs are just meat twinkies!” You shouted, knowing full well your plan to distract him from his tedious work had been successful.

He grabbed your flailing foot, pulling you and your chair closer to him.

“Coconuts are eggs!”

“Oh my god please no” Donnie and you began to mock fight each other, landing childish hits on each other’s arms, and before either of you could notice, your faces were inches apart.

You smiled upon seeing how close you were, and he gave back that a lopsided grin.

He leaned forward, capturing your bottom lip between his.

He pulled back, your face a bright pink, and you could swear Donnie was red in the face too.

“That pop tart one was messed up,” Donnie stated, the both of you giggling.

Michelangelo

You strolled happily into the lair, a box of cupcakes in hand as you head towards Mikeys room. No way you were sharing with the others, sorry guys.

You didn’t bother knocking as you pushed Mikeys door open, kicking it closed behind you.

“Hey Mikey!” You plopped yourself next to him on his bed. He didn’t budge from his spot under the blankets. You nudged him, taking out a cupcake and peeling the paper off the sides.

You pulled back the covers off Mikeys head, /he’s such a heavy sleeper/ you thought.

You pushed the cupcake up against his snout, “I brought cupcaaaakes,” you whispered, grinning widely as Mikey began to stir, his eyes lazily trying to pry themselves open.

“Mmmm... that’s awesome dudette,” Mikey reached up to grab the cupcake, but you quickly pulled it away.

He flipped over, sitting up to match you now, watching in fake horror as you bit into the cupcake, “what? I didn’t say it was for you,” you stifled a laugh as Mikey threw himself back on the bed.

“My trust. Gone. All in that one bite of cupcake!” Mikey threw a fake tantrum on the bed, taking a second to peek at you to see if you were laughing.

You shook your head chuckling, grabbing Mikey his own cupcake. He gasped, sitting next to you accepting the cupcake.

“Cheers,” you click your cupcakes together.

Between the two of you, you managed to finish the box of a dozen cupcakes.

“I think I’m gonna go into a sugar coma,” you burped, which Mikey took as a challenge and burped back louder.

You and Mikey broke into fits of giggles, the butterfly’s in your stomach and the sugar in your system making you feel lighter with warmth.

Mikey eyed you, enjoying how you snorted sometimes when you laughed, wiping extra frosting from your chin.

“Hey, can I kiss you?” Mikey said simply.

Your laughed softly faded as you beamed at Mikey, nodding in agreement.

Mikey scooted closer to you, taking your face into both big hands. His baby blue eyes scanning through your face, you couldn’t hold in the excited giggles from the nerves and neither could he.

He took in a deep breath before pressing his face against yours, you didn’t have a chance to kiss back before he blew all the air in his lungs into your mouth.

You reared your head back, feeling your nose burn from the air pushing through it. You fell into a coughing fit, Mikey holding onto your shoulders, “y/n! Oh dude I’m sorry I-“

You held your hand up, wiping a tiny tear from your eye. You tried giving him a reassuring smile, “no it’s fine,” you finally composed yourself, “how about we try again?”

Mikey gave you that goofy kid smile, before the both of you leaned into each other for a soft, sugary kiss.

#oc x tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles 2016 #bayverse turtles #tmnt raph x reader #tmntsmut #tmnt donnie #tmnt leonardo #tmnt raphael #tmnt mikey #tmnt 2016

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oinkawa-bb · 4 years

Text

first time dads!haikyuu pt. 1

note: here’s part one? i wrote this headcanon for daichi, kuroo, and oikawa ^-^ um i kinda went off i am having a major thing for domesticity rn i'm sorry but let me know if you’d like a second part! or leave me a request for anything you’d like to read here! my reqs are open, and if you have any questions about what i write, check it out here

mentions/topics: pregnancy, domesticity, timeskip, female reader insert

part two (iwaizumi, suna, the miya twins)

part three (tsukki, akaashi, yams, kenma)

☀︎—daichi sawamura

one word: prepared

from the day you surprised him with the pregnancy test, he’s been preparing for this maybe he started even before that but he’s just eager ok

expect daichi to utilize any and all resources he can get his hands on

parenting books and birthing classes and pestering colleagues and relatives for advice

he’s super thorough and wants to cater to your every need during pregnancy

always a little on edge and nervous but won’t show it because he wants you to be able to fully rely on him emotionally and physically i love this man

his favorite part (after bringing home his baby ofc) was setting up the nursery

he literally stared at the crib and closet full of smol onesies for an hour with major uwu eyes because the man is just so excited <33

and when the day comes,

daichi is calmly but quickly ushering you to the car while he single handedly carries the bulky hospital bag (which he definitely helped you overpack months in advance)

he’s cool and collected and clear minded because the man has read too many books and watched too many videos on how labor progresses

after guiding you through a rough and long labor with deep breathing techniques

he finally catches the first sight of his baby,,

and he’s super teary eyed and overwhelmed with all the emotions he tried to suppress while preparing for his baby’s arrival

but his dad instincts majorly kick in and he’s counting the baby’s fingers and toes and asking the doctor questions and keeping an eye on the nurses who hold his whole world in their hands

during skin-to-skin, daichi can’t stop touching the baby’s little fingers and toes and cooing softly (incredibly soft daichi is a rare sight)

but still, the sight of daichi holding his baby against his chest is like none other - it looks like he was waiting his whole life for this moment because he was uwuwuwu

after returning home,

daichi is super super extra tender with you

he knows (from research and now experience) the emotional and physical toll it takes on your body,

paternity leave is an unspoken necessity for daichi

changing diapers? he’s on it. burping the baby? he’s on it. checking on the baby in the dead of night? he’s on it.

daichi wants to do whatever helps you recover the fastest

and he’s just so so soft and sweet to you and it’s just UGHHHH

dad daichi is best daichi

☀︎—tetsuro kuroo

for a nerd, the poor boy is kinda slow and he doesn’t realize that you’ve been leaving him hints for about a week now

when he said kenma was the brain, he meant it

it’s only when you leave your positive pregnancy test blatantly next to the bathroom sink one night

he finds it and he’s jumping and pumping his fists in the air like an idiot

it’s the cutest moment when he comes sprinting out of the bathroom with his hands flailing in the air and his face plastered with the biggest smile

but he lets his excitement die down as he pulls you into a soft hug and kisses the top of your head

he’ll murmur softly with his chin resting on your head,,

“how long have you known?”

“tetsu, i’ve known for more than a week, and i’ve been trying to tell you for more than a week too...” PFFFFT

but now that he knows, he can’t be separated from your side

like, if you thought he was affectionate before, soon-to-be dad kuroo is triple that

he can’t stand to see you in discomfort, and he feels helpless seeing you struggle with morning sickness among other symptoms

so he does his absolute best to help quell your discomfort with his affection

he’ll massage your sore back and your swollen feet and try to adjust to any cuddling position that helps you sleep better

he’s also trying your cravings with you and he’s overly eager to go clothing shopping for the baby

kuroo wants to make the experience good for you, so he picks up cooking and cleaning duty as often as he can

kuroo in an apron is now a normal sight to see

and when your due date arrives,

it’s the middle of the night when your water breaks,

and kuroo leaps out of bed when he hears you whimper and tug on his shirt

he knows how anxious you are, and he channels as much calm energy as he can to help you relax

he’s big on positive affirmations, from the drive to the hospital to the labor process

“baby, you’re doing so good, okay?”

“you can do it, i know you can.”

BIG uwu

but it really hurts him to see you in pain, and he’s trying to do anything and everything when you experience contractions

but after all of the contractions and pain and anxiety, he finally gets to see the baby rest on your chest

silent tears of joy fall from his eyes, and he’s leaning over the both of you, planting gentle kisses on your hair

when he’s reaching out to touch his baby’s smol hands,

the baby’s whole hand wraps around his pointer finger and he’s so smitten

dad kuroo nearly passes out

at home, he’s super encouraging to you, and he’s always reassuring and praising you for working tirelessly

he didn’t know he could experience more love in his life than he already has

but now he knows he can with his new little family<3333

☀︎—tōru oikawa

he’s literally so overjoyed and excited

like he picked you up and spun you around and peppered you with kisses after you first shared the news

after the first trimester passes, oikawa’s the type to tell everyone (who will listen) that he’s going to be a dad

like,, he’s picking you up weird craving foods or something and the cashier couldn’t care less but he’s like

“yeah, it’s for my baby momma” <3333 LMAO i’m just kidding he doesn’t say this... exactly

he’s also obsessed with your baby bump

like obsessed

he always absentmindedly rests his hand beneath your bump and caresses it tenderly

majorly freaks out when he feels a kick

kisses your bump almost more than you (i said almost because if you pout at him after, he’ll kiss your lips twice more ahhh)

i bet he definitely tried to plan some corny halloween costume involving your bump

it’s not all easygoing sometimes though,,

oikawa lays awake sometimes at night and he’s super anxious and insecure about being a dad

but one glance at your peaceful sleeping face

and he feels so reassured and lucky to have you as a partner

the day your water breaks, oikawa literally gets a superhuman adrenaline rush lol

like he’s yeeting things into the car on top of your already well-packed hospital bag because he just wants to be sure everything goes smoothly

“tōru we don’t need the yoga ball-”

“WE’RE BRINGING IT”

he’s definitely a little more nervous and frazzled than you are and he’s not the best at hiding it

but you think it’s funny and cute to see him like this

and after hours of labor,

it honestly looks more like oikawa gave birth LMAO

his eyes are kinda wild and his hair is so disheveled and his clothes are crinkled from trying to cuddle and comfort you in the hospital bed

but he’s overwhelmed with a range of emotions

he’s definitely doing his ugly cry until he gets the chance to hold his baby

his heart stops for a moment and he swears that time stops too

the love in oikawa’s eyes is undeniable, and he promises right then and there that he’d do anything for this little bundle of joy

after bringing the baby home,

oikawa’s glued to the baby monitor if he’s not physically with his baby

but when he’s settled into bed with you after the baby’s asleep, you can hear him mumble incoherently about how happy he is

and it’s true

his eyes literally shine with joy now that he has two loves of his life

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in-my-feels-probably · 3 years

Text

INEFFABLE - Kaz Brekker

Chapter Fourteen

If you would like to read this on Wattpad, it’s on there as well, my @ is in_my_feels_probably and there’s a few visuals and better descriptions and stuff on there. otherwise, enjoy, let me know what you think, and you can check out my masterlist for updates and more. don’t forget to read the prologue, it’s important to the story!

INEFFABLE - Kaz Brekker

ineffable (adj.) too great to be expressed in words, utterly indescribable; too sacred to speak of.

Chapter Fourteen

The next morning, the Crows had made it back to the train that took them through the Fold. They were lying on their stomachs behind their carriage, watching out into the field. Elham could feel that Kaz’s body was tense next to hers, and she scooted closer to Inej, her side touching Inej’s. Inej didn’t seem to notice the movement, although Kaz seemed to relax a bit.

“How many are there?”

Kaz looked closer out into the field, scanning the area around the train for men. “Two. At some point at least one of them will have to go tell a superior what they found. We’ll go in then.”

Jesper turned to the Crows on his right. “Not to be that person, Kaz, but...are you sure you can drive that thing?”

Kaz looked certain, and he sounded exasperated, as if Jesper’s lack of faith in him was unjustified. “Yes.”

Elham rolled her eyes, mumbling. “Because you’ve driven a train before, yeah, I’m sure you’ve got this.”

He ignored her, turning to Jesper. “On the way to Kribirsk, while you were busy hugging bait--”

Jesper interrupted. “Milo. The goat’s name was Milo.”

“I was memorizing Arken’s timings.”

Inej looked uncertain. “Not to gang up on you, but, Jes has a point. Arken’s system was complicated and the ride was chaotic. No one would blame you for missing a count.”

Elham and Kaz both turned their heads, simultaneously speaking. “Jes?”

Jesper smiled. “It’s Suli, for friendship.”

Elham scoffed. “I may not know much Suli, but I can guarantee it’s not. Or is Jes, here, right, Inej?”

Kaz didn’t let her respond. “Trust me. Arken and I think alike.”

Elham chuckled. “Saints, I sure hope not.”

Before Kaz could respond, an explosion went off, and the Crows turned to watch the train go up in flames.

Elham suddenly couldn’t control her laughter, setting her forehead on her arms rested out in front of her.

“Of course.”

Jesper turned to her. “Too soon to appreciate the irony, am I right?”

Kaz ducked his head down, closing his eyes, jaw clenched. Elham noticed the movement next to her and murmured quietly next to him.

“Hey, it’s ok. We’ll figure it out, Kaz. There has to be another way across...and if there’s not, I’m not opposed to Jesper’s idea of opening up a bar and brewing beer. I could be a barmaid, yeah?”

Jesper chuckled. “You? A barmaid?”

“Beats being Heleen’s little fawn, right? Besides, I’d be a good barmaid.”

He was still laughing, but the humor had left. “Yeah, you’d be just about as good of a barmaid as you’d be Queen of the Barrel. And stop joking about Heleen, alright? It’s not funny.”

Elham smiled at him sadly. “If I don’t laugh, I’ll cry, Jesper.”

His face was full of pity, and she turned away, looking back down at her hands resting on her arms. Inej leaned closer, brushing her shoulder against Elham’s.

“I think you’d make a good Queen.”

Kaz finally spoke up, the ghost of a grin on his face. “A dangerous one, at least. I’d hate to be under your reign.”

Elham glanced up at him, smiling. “I’d spare you. Probably. I’d at least consider it.”

He rolled his eyes, standing up, motioning for the Crows to follow.

---

The Crows used the last of their money to get a room, and Kaz had spent the last half hour trying to figure out what to do. Elham took this time to practice with her new sword, Jesper duelling her with a piece of wood he had found.

He was out of breath, flailing around the room. “This isn’t fair, you know? You have a nice sword, I have a stick. You’re literally called the Valkyrie, this is not a Jesper talent, why can’t we use guns?”

“Stop whining, Jesper, you’re fine. Keep going, I need the practice.”

Kaz scoffed in his chair, almost laughing. “No, you don’t.”

Inej came in, clearly amused by Jesper being chased around the room. She turned to Kaz.

“The skiff is still here. Travelers downstairs are complaining. They were due to cross this morning.”

Kaz nodded. “Orders from the Black General. He plans to cross on it tomorrow.”

Jesper stopped running, holding his hands up in surrender. “The General? Is that the same general who tried to, oh yeah, kill us all? And use Elham to build a literal flaming wall of fire and darkness? That one?”

“He has the Sun Summoner.”

Elham turned to look at Kaz, face contorted in confusion. How did he know that? And why hadn’t he told her? Was there anything she could have done to stop it, to protect Alina? Inej stepped closer to her, clearly upset.

“Was this your plan all along? To have the General get her back so you can take her again?

“My plan is to get us across the Fold. We aren’t prepared for another fight.”

Inej raised a brow. “So you’re not going to take another run at Alina? And you’re really willing to let a million kruge go? All you want is to cross the Fold?”

Kaz grumbled, but nodded, standing up.

Jesper stepped forward. “Hang on. Are we talking about boarding a skiff with people who will recognize us? People who don’t like us much?”

Kaz pondered, turning to Inej. “We’ll have to blend in. Who else was on that skiff?”

“Some people from the winter fete. Dignitaries from Kerch and Novyi Zem on their way home.”

He raised a brow. “And now they’re audience to one more light show.”

He was silent for a moment, and Elham swore she could almost hear the gears turning in his head. She leaned closer to Jesper, whispering.

“Scheming face?”

He nodded, whispering back. “Scheming face. We’re not gonna like this, are we?”

Kaz finally spoke. “Jesper, how did you enjoy playing a Zemeni guard?”

---

By nightfall, a plan was set in motion. Inej was perched atop a balcony, waiting to signal Elham. Elham waited until she got a nod from Inej, and turned to see a group of men walking her way. Kaz and Jesper came out of the alley behind them, walking slowly.

Elham approached the group of men, a smile on her face. “Excuse me, sir?”

One of the men stepped forward, smiling. “Yes, miss?”

Elham smiled, moving closer to the man like she was going to tell him a secret. He leaned in and waited. She set her hands on his shoulders, lightly gripping at his coat. She could hear the man's friends chuckling behind him. Before he could speak, she drove her knee up into his gut, sending him bending over and stumbling to the ground, clutching his stomach. She delivered a quick kick to his face, and he was out cold.

The man’s friends quickly scrambled to their friends' side, checking to see if he was ok. “You bitch, what did you do that for?”

One of them stood to move towards her, and she gripped the hilt of her sword, but Kaz and Jesper beat her to it. Kaz used his cane, Jesper used the base of his pistol, and they both swung at the same time, each taking out one of the remaining men, knocking them unconscious.

Jesper smiled, bending down to grab one of the men under his shoulders. “Nice job, love. “

He turned to Kaz, who hadn’t moved. “Are you gonna help?”

Kaz just swung his cane up into his grip, holding it up for Jesper to see. Elham rolled her eyes.

“Oh. Well isn’t that convenient for you? Elham...please?”

She sighed, grumbling. She hooked her arms under the smallest looking man, lugging him up. “Fine! Only because I nearly cut you earlier and I’m still feeling slightly guilty.”

“That was a very close call, by the way, I think you still owe me.”

“Jesper! I’ll drop him!”

“Fine, fine. Come on.”

---

Ten minutes later, Jesper had successfully stripped one of the men from his outfit, placing it on himself. He was admiring himself in the mirror, smoothing down his coat.

Inej was rolling her eyes. “You look fine.”

“Oh, I look more than fine.”

Without looking up from the papers Kaz was fabricating, he handed Elham the dress she had worn at the fete.

She grabbed it from him. “You’re not serious? Why does Inej get to wear the cool coat and I’m stuck in a dress again?”

“Because. We’re blending in. You’re supposed to look nice, like the rest of the wives who came from the winter fete will.”

Elham peeked out from the corner she had ducked behind to change. “Wives?”

“You’re playing Jesper’s.”

Jesper grinned, turning to Elham. “My love! I must say, I do like you in a dress.”

Elham grumbled, stepping out from the corner, once again in the dress. “First your wife, now Jesper’s, why do your plans always involve me playing a wife?”

Inej chuckled. “He had you play his wife? I would have loved to see that. You already argue like an old married couple, it wouldn’t be that much of a change.”

Elham’s cheeks heated up, and she suddenly found the fabric of her dress very interesting, fiddling with it. Kaz finally looked up from his papers, quickly changing the subject.

“Just be happy I’m letting you keep that sword strapped to your back. If they ask why you have it, just say you bought it in town as a souvenir or gift or something, and that you don't want it damaged in the cargo hold. I’m sure you can think of something dramatic enough that one of those pampered wives would say before causing a scene their husband would have to buy their way out of.

Before Elham could come up with something sarcastic as a rebuttal, he continued. “Alright, I made some edits to the papers. Should be enough to get us through the checkpoint and onto the skiff.”

Jesper leaned forward, looking confused at his paper. “Huh? No one is ever going to believe I’m that old.”

Kaz only looked up at him. “You tell yourself that.”

Jesper scoffed, clearing his throat and stomping off. Kaz smirked, looking back down at his papers. Inej smiled, and Elham called after Jesper dramatically.

“It’s alright, my love! I like older men!”

He called back to her, huffing. “Shut up Elham!”

---

The Crows were now in line to board the skiff, papers in hand.

The guard at the table spoke. “Consider yourselves lucky. You’re traveling with the Black General and the Sun Summoner, which means you’re about to witness the destruction of the Fold.”

Elham mumbled under her breath, stepping up closer in line. “Yes, I’m so lucky to be boarding with people who want to kill me, very excited to be here, honestly.”

Jesper stepped up to the guard, handing him his papers along with Elham’s. She stood at his side with her arm linked through his, smiling. The guard looked over the papers, glancing up questionably.

Jesper smiled. “I know. I look amazing for my age.”

The guard shook his head, handing them back. “Well, I thought you looked older.”

Jesper let out a pained laugh, and Elham hid her smile, grabbing his hand. “Come on, love.”

They headed to the skiff, when the crowd started whispering amongst themselves, glancing behind them. The Crows turned to see Alina emerge from the tent, a black cloak engulfing her. The Darkling followed closely behind, scanning the area.

Elham quickly turned back around, seething. “Please let me kill him.”

Kaz scoffed, using his cane to push her forward. “Not a chance...well, at least not today. I’ll consider it again later.”

---

They boarded the skiff, quickly moving to the back, hiding in the shadows, away from Alina and the Darkling at the front.

Jesper spoke quietly. “ Good news? It’s just as terrifying as I remember.”

Elham turned to him. “How is that good news? We’re completely exposed.”

Growling was heard in the distance as the Fold drew closer, and Elham felt her heart sink.

Jesper sighed. “If I’m meant to die today, and one of you survives, make sure I have an open casket.”

Elham gripped Jesper’s hand, giving it a squeeze. Kaz kept his eyes locked on the Darkling.

“No one’s dying today. No mourners, eh, Creed?”

Elham grimly smiled at him, and the Crows replied in unison. “No funerals.”

The skiff plunged into darkness.

---

A/N - we're in the last episode of content now, only a few more chapters to go! i hope you've enjoyed so far and are happy with the story, i'm excited to get the rest out and put the rest of those little details i was excited about into the story. we still have a lot of cool stuff for this episode to go through, and is could have another chapter out soon. let me know what you thought, and thank you for the support!

#wattpad #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker #six of crows imagine #six of crows #shadow and bone #in my feels probably #inferni #ineffable #grishaverse #x reader #oc

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katsukavi · 3 years

Text

I wanted to make this a full fanfiction on my wattpad, but I didn’t want to disappoint everyone with the super slow updates (like my scumlord lol) so.. here’s crap I pulled out of my notes called arise, undead (“pretty obsessed” sung jin-woo x male, zombie reader) I also really like the options I have in tumblr lol. I’m a little embarrassed to add tags because I’m not sure if people will like it and stuff.. But yeah! This is the book cover I made for it here too! :D

Im having too much fun with these new stuff~ (please excuse me. this is my first long post and i love everything here—)

(spoilers)

The plot is that Jin-Woo finds an undead in the woods, tries to arise him and it does work. Now they fight together because the zombie has no memories and is literally immortal (yet dead). Near the end, they discover that MC was murdered and his body was buried in the woods yada yada. Then when Jin-Woo goes back, he has to save him. But, he has to save MC as a 15 year old while MC is a 27 year old..

(I planned that part out and I think it’s a little funny how suddenly a kid approaches you like “You’re going to die if you go somewhere. Come with me, I’m your lover from the future.”

“Ah, it’s a chuunibyou.. Sorry kid, but I need to go to work—“

“No.”

‘Alive or not, MC still looks like a zombie.. Why are you so overworked?!’)

IT WAS SUNG JIN-WOO’S FIRST TIME using his new job skills, so naturally he’d get excited in testing every single little thing about it. He just exited the purple hued portal behind him, feeling like he acquired an interesting new toy to play with. Even though he was tired from the lack of sleep, his joy kept him from passing out.

Either it was that, or the rain pouring over his head. All his excitement flushed into disappointment as his shoes got muddy from the damp forest foor and his clothes getting completely soaked in rainwater. It would be impossible to pass out with the loud thunder rumbling in the background.

He cursed with every step on his path, finding it hard to walk with the slippery and uneven soil, his vision blurry from water and dark skies and his body dragging itself against harsh rain. Unfortunately, he was also already very exhausted.

Out of all the times for a thunderstorm, why did it have to be right after the job change quest?

From behind the trees, he heard a low distorted roar—forcing him to dip his head towards it’s direction. He held a dagger in one hand, trying to make out its shape from behind the trees.

It was in a humanoid shape, making him relax just a little bit. “Is anyone there?” he questioned.

His voice seemed to reach the stranger as they left their hiding spot in the trees’ shade. The person looked to be a man wearing a formal suit, diluted blood marking over his chest and face. Even though he looked human, he didn’t seem to breathe, just limply staring at Jin-Woo with a blank and lifeless expression.

Strangely, the stranger’s (s/c) skin was pale, like blood hasn’t been pumping through his veins. But attacking a person because they looked really sick wasn’t a good thing, it’s like attacking an overworked person because they looked so dead. It was either it was too dark or the view was too blurry.

“Hello?” Jin-Woo called out one time, staying cautious from the stranger. It lunged at Jin-Woo with a raspy growl, nearly scratching his face. Jin-Woo ducked, a small scratch appearing on his face from the speed. It definitely wasn’t human.

Sung Jin-Woo was already fatigued, at a disadvantage with the location as well. He cursed, barely dodging every slash thrown at him. “Igris!” he called out, the shadow materialising from behind him. Igris grabbed the humanoid monster, a splash of mud splattering around as it was thrown.

Sung Jin-Woo stabbed it deep in the chest, not a single drop of blood spilling out as he stepped back to breathe. He put his hands on his knees, staring at the lifeless corpse as he sent Igris back. ‘It seems pretty strong.. Should I extract it?’

He took a deep breath, getting closer to the body as he raised his hand. His posture was elegant, holding a composed expression as droplets of rain streamed down his attractive face, adding to his charm. A deep and soothing voice left his mouth, sending chills to anyone who would hear it.

“Arise.”

Though unfortunately, the Shadow Monarch was greeted with nothing but silence and the sound of ambient rain. That’s odd, if it was a failed extraction then a notification would pop up to let him know or something. Was the system suddenly broken? If that’s the case, he should try again.

“Arise.. arise. ARISE!” he shouted multiple times, but a shadow didn’t get extracted. He furrowed his brows, squatting down to find out the cause of his skill suddenly breaking. “Why isn’t it working..?” he mumbled under his breath, getting closer to the body with a puzzled look on his face.

“Arise. Arise. Arise arise arise. Wake up. Rise and shine. Arise. Awake. Good morning. Arise.”

“I’m not dead yet, dimwit.”

Did the body just.. talk back to him?

“You didn’t hear anything,” Jin-Woo blurted out, getting embarrassed from the montage of Arise and synonyms he was saying to something that was alive. He stabbed the body once again, trying to kill it as he attempted once more. “Arise.”

“You don’t have to try again. I’m not dead,” the man just sat up like it was just his average tuesday, sliding out the blade from his chest, handing it to Jin-Woo and dusting off his clothes. The undead just raised his head towards the sky, watching clouds part as he lifted his palm, no more droplets landing on top of it. “Oh, the rain is clearing up.”

“Excuse me. Didn’t you just try to attack me?”

“Did I? I don’t remember,” the stranger scratched the back of his neck, looking bored as he yawned. “My name is (L/n) (M/n), age 27. And you are?”

“Sung Jin-Woo, 24.”

“Nice meeting you. Now where in the hell am I?”

/////////////////////////////

(L/N) (M/N) HAD A NASTY SCOWL on his face, plopping the sewing kit on Jin-Woo’s bed as he angrily tried to open it with one arm. Unfortunately, someone had cut off his right arm that he spent ages trying to sew back on.

“What next, my leg?” he cursed under his breath as Sung Jin-Woo opened it for him. “Wait a minute,” Jin-Woo said, sticking the end of his arm to his shoulder. “Hold this,” he said, making (M/n) keep his limb in one place as he put the thread in the needle.

“What?” The zombie still looked very angry, knitting his brows together as he held still. “I thought you needed a hand,” Jin-Woo lightly joked, trying to make (M/n)’s mood towards him a little better. The undead male gave him his signature dead stare, tightly holding his severed upper arm before speaking.

“Jin-Woo, I am dead serious here.”

He started to lightly chuckle, noticing that Sung Jin-Woo was almost finished with sewing his arm back on his body. “Hey, you’re pretty good at this.” His remark made Jin-Woo smile as he opened and closed his hand, almost as if it was brand new.

“My clothes kept getting ripped when I was E-Rank. I learned naturally.”

“The next time you rip off my limbs, please fix them too,” (M/n) said, flailing his right hand in the air with satisfaction.

“Well next time. I’m sure I’ll make you mine.”

“I doubt that.”

///////////////////////////// (now it’s just random dialogues i pulled out of my idea dump lol)

“OH HECK! There goes my leg!”

“Oh no... He’s dead! It’s not like I’m happy about it or anything~! ...Arise arise arise arise—“

“IM NOT DEAD!”

“God damn it.. Jin-Woo, could you go fetch my torso, and my arms and my legs and uh.. my head. Yes, thank you.”

“You don’t have a heartbeat and your skin is ice cold. I stabbed you 32 times. How are you still moving?”

“Dunno, ask Jesus.”

“I CAN’T BREATHE! I’M DYING.”

“You don’t breathe, (M/n).”

“Oh yeah, you’re right.”

“Sometimes I wonder if you want me dead or if you want me alive. Which one is it?”

“Either way is fine as long as you’re mine.”

“Gross, necrophiliac.”

“Good night, (M/n).”

“Good night, Jin-Woo..”

“Alright.. arise arise arise arise arise arise arise—“

“Once again, I am not dead.”

“You’re not useless, (M/n). Because when you die, I WILL MAKE YOU MY SHADOW.”

“HOW IS THAT SUPPOSED TO COMFORT ME?!”

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jonkentt · 3 years

Text

we could move in together

or Bucky suffering but make it crack****

Bucky drops onto the couch with a contented sigh. He stretches out, hands behind his head, smirking like he’s truly done something to be proud of. Sam’s coming over for dinner and finally, finally Bucky’s got a plan. They’ve been alternating these datenights dinners and whenever it’s Sam’s turn he cooks. Big batches of stuff he says he wants to make for Sara and the boys if it’s any good. Course, it’s always good. Bucky loves Sam’s cooking. He loves showing up much too early so he can watch Sam cook. Sam gets in fights with pots and pans, curses under his breath whenever he measures something wrong. You’d think everything he made would be a disaster but somehow, no matter how many times Sam swears that internet recipes are the bane of his existence, the food is delicious. Which makes Bucky feel like an asshole for ordering take-out on his turn every single time.

It’s not that he doesn’t want to cook for Sam. Boy, has he tried. But how can he tell if anything’s edible? Nothing compares to Sam’s cooking. So Bucky’ll make something, taste a spoonful, and decide it’s complete shit just in time for Sam to show up. There’s been a couple of close calls when Sam asked why his apartment smelled like pasta if they were eating deli sandwiches. (“It smells burnt in here, Buck.” “Ha! Yeah, I think my neighbor, uh, had some trouble.”) But tonight, Bucky has a plan. He found a recipe that was supposed to be “fool proof” and practiced making it yesterday. Sure it’s a mac-n-cheese casserole but there were several different cheeses in it so… that should count for something. He had a dish waiting to be put it in the oven when Sam arrived.

“I think we got this all tied up, don’t you Alpine?” Bucky says to the rabbit as she makes her way across the room to settle on his feet. Alpine’s favorite place to sit is on Bucky’s feet, which he thinks is adorable. He considers cuddling Alpine on his lap but Sam will be here any minute and he doesn’t need to be covered in bunny hair. Bucky as some class. The self-satisfied grin is still plastered to his face when Sam let’s himself into his apartment.

“Sam! You gotta explain this show to me! TV doesn’t make sense anymore.” His smile falters when he turns to see Sam crossing the room in long strides, some kind of burning intent clear on his face. “Uh—” Sam lands on the couch turned towards him. Bucky is keenly aware of the lack of personal space Sam has left between them. Sam’s knee is practically in his lap. Bucky sits there with his mouth half open, struck by the intensity of Sam’s stare. He doesn’t look angry, so that’s good at least. But what the fuck?

“Did you tell Sarah we were moving in together?”

Bucky blinks. “Wha—”

“At the cookout. Sarah just asked me if we’d found a place yet. What the hell? You can’t just tell my sister that we’re moving in together and not let me know!”

Bucky lets out a startled laugh. “The cookout? That was weeks ago! I’m sure she was just messing with you—”

“So you were joking?” Again, Bucky’s smile slides off his face. What is happening? Sam is not kidding right now. He might very actually be pissed off. But it was a joke? …wasn’t it?

“I…” Bucky trails off. So he’s been daydreaming about living with Sam. But that’s not what Bucky tells himself. He’s just picturing their dinners together at different times of day. Like in the mornings. Sam in pajamas is a quintessential element of these daydreams.

“Were you serious, Bucky? I’m trying to imagine that you wouldn’t just run your mouth off around my sister as a joke.” Sam is pinning him with this intense expression that Bucky can’t figure out and it’s taking all his self control not to squirm.

“I guess… it wasn’t.”

Sam keeps up the laser eyes till Bucky can practically feel two points boring through his skull. Finally, Sam sighs.

“Man…” Sam says, slowly shaking his head. He takes Bucky’s hand and holds it to his chest, just like they had outside Sarah’s house after Bucky confessed an overdue apology. But now, Bucky’s hand is literally against Sam’s chest and he can feel Sam’s heart beating. The thud, thud makes his stomach flip. Bucky stares at their hands. Sam is so close and that’s making him forget how to breathe. Maybe he should be looking somewhere else. Somewhere other than Sam’s hand gripping his. Listening to something other than Sam’s heartbeat. When Bucky meets Sam’s eyes again he regrets it instantly. This is 100x worse than before. This is tender.

“If you’re going to do this, you gotta be sure.” Sam’s voice is warm. His brown eyes are warm. His hand is warm. His chest is— you get the idea. Bucky’s brain still isn’t processing what the hell Sam is talking about. “Cause I won’t have you fuckin’ around with my heart.” Wait- what? “I don’t have the time or the mental space to deal with that. You understand?” Bucky would literally rather be in cryo right now. “Bucky.” The fuck does Sam expect him to say? If he starts moving his lips then words should form eventually.

“I wouldn’t do…” This is a struggle. Sam raises an eyebrow.

“You wouldn’t do what?”

“Fuck around.” It comes out barely a whisper. Sam sighs and Bucky thinks he’s actually going to die.

“What are we talking about, Buck? How you wouldn’t lie to my sister? Or how—”

“Yeah! Sure! I don’t know!” Bucky has class. He swears to god he used to have class. “I wouldn’t lie to Sarah! Yeah, I do want to live with you. It’s kinda the only thing I think about. But I didn’t know how to tell YOU that!” There’s a grin spreading across Sam’s face and it’s making Bucky feel things. “And I wouldn’t fuck around with your heart! That’s literally the last thing I would ever do! Your heart is very important to me and I would…!” Whatever courage he had is disappearing fast. “…take care…” Dear god almighty does Sam have to do that with his face? “…of it.”

Sam is smiling like the actual sun. And Bucky is burning to a crisp under a magnifying glass.

Sam leans back with a satisfied “hrmph.” He drops Bucky’s hand and stands up. Bucky involuntarily leans into the empty space like Sam left some kind of gravitational pull. What the fuck just happened? Bucky looks at Alpine. The rabbit is sitting on her hind legs beside him, looking up at him curiously and twitching her nose.

“So what’s for dinner? Take-out again?” If it could reach, Bucky’s jaw would drop to the floor. Sam looks like he’s trying not to laugh.

“That’s it?!!”

“What’s it? You forget to order a pizza or somethin?” Sam takes a few steps toward the kitchen and Bucky jumps off the couch.

“Sam. I hate you.”

“Wow. That hurts, Bucky. I thought my heart was important to you.”

“I—!” Bucky flails his arms around. Sam is grinning in that stupidly adorable irresistible way of his. The situation is hopeless. How is Bucky supposed to think when Sam is being this cute? And now he knows that Bucky wants to live with him? Disastrous. “I made you dinner!”

Sam looks surprised, maybe even a little touched. “Really?”

“Yes, really!” Bucky pushes past him on his way into the kitchen, overly aware of how their shoulders brush. Bucky pulls the casserole out of the fridge and transfers it to the pre-heated oven. Now that he’s not looking at Sam, the thought of meeting his gaze again makes Bucky feel queasy. Instead he decides to lean over the oven and stare at its digital clock. A perfect excuse to avoid those obnoxiously beautiful brown eyes for the next 20 minutes.

“What is it?”

“Casserole.”

Sam laughs. “You realize there’s like a million different kinds of casseroles, right?”

“Macaroni,” Bucky mumbles.

“Sounds promising. You’ve got beer somewhere?” Bucky mumbles some more because how can he admit now that he went searching for Sam’s favorite hard lemonade that’s annoyingly hard to get in New York? He hears Sam open the fridge. Too late. “Oh my god, you found this stuff here?!” The distinct crack of a can opening punctuates Sam’s excitement. “You’re the best, man.”

Bucky could say something snarky. Really, he should at least try. But his ears are burning and so is his face and goddammit why is this happening. Sam’s silent, clearly waiting for a comeback. Bucky starts to sweat. He hears Sam come up behind him. What is breathing? Surely it’s a non-essential function. Then Sam presses himself to Bucky’s back and wraps his perfect hunky arms around his waist. Bucky’s hearts skips at least five beats when he feels Sam’s warm breath on his ear.

“You just gonna stare at the clock then, huh?”

“Ye—“ Bucky clears his throat. “Yeah.”

“Mmm, okay,” Sam hums and rests his chin on Bucky’s shoulder, obviously with no intention of showing mercy.

“What are you doing?” Bucky’s voice is much higher than he cares to admit.

“Staring with you.” Bucky swallows. He can’t do this for another 18 minutes. “You gonna cook for me when we live together?”

WHAT. Bucky’s brain is hot and spinning like a clothes dryer but it’s his thoughts that are tumbling. Yeah, he’s definitely sweating a lot now. Bucky ducks his head, not realizing that would be a terrible idea. Sam drops a kiss on the exposed back of his neck. So this is it then. This is how it ends. Bucky is going to pass out or die or both.

“How much longer can you hold your breath before it becomes a problem?” God, Sam is such a smug asshole. “I don’t wanna scrape you off the kitchen floor before dinner.”

Bucky tries to inhale slowly, but it’s shaky- of fucking course it is. “I really hate you,” is all he can manage to whisper.

“Ya know, that’s funny,” Sam purrs. Literally purrs because he clearly wants Bucky to suffer. “Cause I could swear that you actually have a huge, embarrassing, all-consuming crush on me.”

Fuck right off, Sam Wilson, you perfect fucking prick, is what Bucky thinks. But somehow, unforgivably, what he says is, “You have really beautiful eyes, Sam.”

That startles a laugh out of Sam. “Why thank you, Bucky! But it’s kinda hard to believe you really mean that from the way you’re so adamantly not looking at me.”

“You know I mean it. Always accusing me of having a staring problem.”

“Still… you could convince me.” Sam’s tone is a challenge. Fuck this.

“Sam, if I look at you, I’ll either die or have to kiss you.”

“You’re so dramatic,” Sam chuckles. “You can kiss me, but dying right now would be inconvenient.”

That’s it! Bucky turns on him. “Inconvenient? In- fucking -convenient?!”

“Well, yeah, you didn’t say how long the casserole should be in the oven for.”

“Get out of my apartment!”

“Make me!”

Bucky grabs Sam’s face in both hands and kisses him hungrily. Fuck mac-n-cheese. He’s having Sam for dinner.

#they’re idiots #and this was super fun to write #sambucky fic #bucky barnes fic #back on my gay shit #onlysambucky

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capochinootea · 3 years

Text

How the Shishigumi met Baby Louis

Me thinks Baby Louis and Shishigumi wholesome time ^-^

Free

When Free first met Louis, it was in the middle of a shootout. He was 17. Young, brash and bold. A few weeks into the Shishigumi, and he's already considered an elite, impressing those who have climbed the ranks for longer.

It was an unfortunate time when Free was met face-to-face with a child, a herbivore child, no less. Guns drawn, ready to fire at their leader’s command. In all Free’s years of living in the Back Alley Market, this is by far, the most ridiculous thing that has ever happened.

Members of the gang yelled for back up. He was ready. Ready to take on their opponents, but what he sees is a much taller, more mature lion- Ibuki, he realizes, blocking his way, hands extended.

...What?

Confused and slightly irritated, he was handed a child and the lion left to help his comrades. Poor and confused 17-year old Free sat there, as the fawn- aged 6- he guessed- giggled at him, oblivious to the danger they’re both in.

---

Ibuki

Livestock. Ibuki never fancied the business. Even for a gangster lion like him, selling livestock- he thinks of it so immoral. You must be completely fucked down to the core if the mafioso lion has more heart than you.

When news travelled to the Shishigumi of a livestock trafficking ring not having paid their share, Ibuki breathed a sigh of relief. An excuse, he thought.

Finally.

But when he got there, it was like a place after war. It smelled of filth, abandon and decay. The building barely stands, it’s pillars a breath away from collapse.

In it lay a single fawn, blood stained but alive. A living, breathing being surrounded by death, of carcasses and corpses. The fawn looked as though he was the god of death himself, mortalized in a fragile being, cursed to wander the earth, leaving death in his footsteps.

---

Dolph

For a lion who’s lived in the market for more than 2 decades, he thought he had seen it all- the mundane, the gruesome, the ridiculous. Hell, the Shishigumi is proof of that. But somehow, not even the pole dancing mice could top this.Standing there, by the mansion’s gates was Ibuki, a sleeping fawn in his arms, bundled in his suit jacket. If he were any more shocked, his jaw might have hit the ground.

Surely the trip to the livestock trafficking ring didn’t hit Ibuki’s head. If not, then that’s probably not Ibuki at all. He was pretty damned sure that if anyone in the Shishigumi were to replace the old chief (should his ultimate demise were to ever happen- he hoped soon), it would be Ibuki.

Yet he stands there, a soft look in his eyes, the happiest he looked since he joined. He can’t help but feel dumb. The market is just full of surprises.

---

Hino

It was Wednesday night. The mansion silent and empty, its corridors barely illuminated by the hanging low light above . Almost all of the lions had left for the night, sans a few lower goons keeping watch over the gates. Sitting by the hideout’s make-shift home bar, nothing felt out of the ordinary.

He cradled the cheap whiskey in his hands and circled the drink slowly. He watched the drink as it created a mini whirlpool, his reflection on the glass.

His brows furrowed in confusion. Something was amiss. This isn’t right.

His tail moved back and forth, fur standing, mind on edge. Someone foreign was in the mansion. He continued to watch his reflection, but there was no sign of the intruder.

Too late did he realize, as a creature suddenly latched onto his leg. He would've kicked the stranger out of instinct, but when he caught a glimpse of wide ears flinching, the smell of lion on him, all sense of dread died.

Looking down, he sees a fawn, toothily grinning at him, hugging his legs like they were pillows.

“What are you doing here little guy?” Hino crouches, hands folded so as to not hurt the tiny creature.

The fawn giggled, clutching his face in his mini hands. They’re warm, he noted. .

“Mr. Lion!!” He cackled.

And like a child calling for its mother, Ibuki came running up the stairs, his glasses out of place, strands of his mane flying everywhere. He looked like hell.

“Louis!” he called and bolted right after where he sat.

Such a strange sight to see. A huge lion cradling a fawn, no bigger than Ibuki’s hands. A smile found its way to Hino’s flawless features. It’s a beautiful Wednesday night.

---

Sabu

He’s getting old, he realizes. His mane is getting harder to grow, his joints more prone to aches. He wonders if growing old is a gift, with what dangers lurking in the Back Alley Market. You’re lucky if you still have all your limbs intact by the age of 30.

Sitting by the kitchen counter, he closes his eyes. Ah, well it’s not like he could complain. In fact, he’s lucky to be alive, limbs and all.

“Up!”

He cracks one eye open.

..What?

“Up! Up!” Standing there, a creature unlike him. A fawn. No older than 6 he thinks. Clutching what he assumes is a stuffed animal, a small pout laced its face.

He had so many questions.

“Up! Up!!!” The fawn demanded, now running around, making soft tap tap taps against the floors of the mansion.

How youthful, he thought, picking up the child, giggling as his arms wrap around its tiny waist.

“Funny lion man!” it cackles, now trying to climb his head, to touch his mane. He assumes his mohawk is a different sight from what the fawn usually sees.

He still has so many questions.

He let the fawn play with his mane, not minding the strands that now fall against his face, covering his eyes.

“Ibuki!!” the tiny fawn suddenly shrieked, hurriedly trying to climb down from his now lopsided mane. He watches the young fawn dash to the other, who caught him as he propelled himself in the air.

How youthful, he thought again.

---

Miguel

It’s not like he’s not used to the fearful looks most herbivores and even the lesser carnivores give him. He’s big, brawny, a lion through and through. A literal king of the beast. To say he was used to the wary stares, the jealous glares, is the simple truth.

His footsteps alone are enough to spook a sheep down to its very core. He need not speak to intimidate a room full of hyenas, no. Even baring his fangs would be too much.

Which is why he found this whole ordeal completely and utterly ridiculous.

A tiny fawn stood before him, staring up at him. Fearless, he thinks. No! He was awestruck… mouth agape and ears perked up. He looked at him like he’s something to behold.

“Big Lion Man!!!” it cackles.

Odd..

It was so odd.

He felt his heart swell beneath the hard muscle, beneath tendons, flesh and bones. Never before has a creature looked at him with such delight. From a herbivore no less.

---

Jinma and Dope

If there’s any duo more suited to work together in the Shishigumi, the title befalls on one Jinma and Dope. Another successful negotiation. Another night of festivities.

Tonight, the table was decorated with an assortment of meals, meat cooked to perfection. A flawless buffet. An impeccable occasion.

Until Jinma caught a glimpse of movement beneath the table covers. An intruder? A spy? That’s impossible. It just is. He knows no one would have balls big enough to go alone in the Shishigumi headquarters unscathed.

He eyed the table covers with great intensity. He squints, watching the creases of the fabric, waiting to see any sign of movement. Nothing. Not until a foreign tiny hand slipped under the covers to grab a lone piece of meat sat atop the table.

In an instant, he lifted the white sheet, uncovering the thief hidden below the covers. He expected a young lowly canine, or mayhaps a racoon, only to find a giggling fawn munching on the small piece of meat he’s stolen.

“The fuck..” he heard someone mutter behind him. Dope, he thinks.

“Hello!” The young deer greeted, mouth full of meat.

This is weird.

Jinma watches as the fawn finally moves to unveil himself out of the white sheets, walking towards Dolph, who picks him up like it was something he’d done before.

This is so weird.

The two lions watch with their heads tilted to the side. Confused, they see Dolph smile at the tiny fawn he was cradling, who was still chewing the meat he’d stolen.

“The fuck” Jinma mutters.

---

Agata

“What??” Agata squawked, hands balled into a fist. How could they do this? To a lion, barely the age of 16.

“I.. I can’t! I’m not sure how to?” he countered, looking anywhere but the scene before him.

A child, clinging to the cuffs of Ibuki’s suit jacket. A fawn, 9 or 10 years old- by the looks of it.

“Agata, it will only be for an hour or two,” Dolph explained.

Like that’s going to change anything.

“But! Dolph-san, why? We don’t even know who this kid is? I mean.. Why can’t we just give him back to his parents?” He blurted.. The words left his mouth before he could process what he had just said. He prayed to whichever gods listening to him to please not make him babysit a child- and a herbivore child too!

Ibuki furrows his brows, before sharing a look with Dolph, who looks as equally as upset. A beat, and then,

“Louis stays with the Shishigumi,” Ibuki stated, like it’s the most obvious thing.

“You can’t be serious!” Agata whined, his arms flailing. It was a fight he couldn’t win. He frowned.

It didn’t take Agata more than a second to realize that his outburst had caused Louis to hide more behind Ibuki, his teeth bared, eyes burning with passionate hate.

Ah... He really did not like babysitting.

#beastars #shishigumi #beastars free #beastars ibuki #beastars dolph #beastars hino #beastars sabu #beastars miguel #beastars jinma #beastars dope #beastars agata #beatstars headcanon #shishigumi headcanons #my heart #i cant #i love them so much

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starbeyy · 3 years

Text

how haikyuu characters would die on the oregon trail

this is so incredibly stupid. i guess you can imagine this as them playing the game but I like to think that it’s actually the characters in the old west dying from ancient diseases. it’s funnier that way. cw: cursing, lots of death (but it’s kinda funny)

Karasuno

Hinata // died from cholera. shit himself to death. literally the least glamorous way to die when you’re traversing in search of a better life.

Kageyama // he got bit by a venomous snake but we all know he’s the kind of bitch to get bit by a zombie then not tell anyone, so he’s walking around holding his wrist and then one day he just kinda drops dead and everyones like 🤨 huh?

Tsukishima // literally a broken arm. you can die from a broken arm on the Oregon Trail. and everyone is like a little convinced that someone poisoned him to make him die quicker cause they were so tired of his bitching..

Yamaguchi // broke his leg from jumping into a lake bc he didn’t want to pay for the bathhouse; he limped too much and got run over by the cattle that was pulling his covered wagon :(

Nishinoya // died from exhaustion. he just went too hard for too long and then he tried to wrestle a gator and dropped dead literally immediately after. mad respect tho that gator had it coming ✊🏼😔

Tanaka // another tragic exhaustion loss, but it’s only because he tried to carry Kiyoko the entire way. she tried to make him just let her sit in the covered wagon, but he INSISTED on carrying her piggyback. he made a huge deal of his death but Kiyoko was just like “this could’ve been easily avoided”.

Ennoshita // poor thing was doing a great job, more than halfway there, then he got a fever. a fever put this poor mfer down. i don’t even know what to tell you he just fevered himself to death.

Asahi // he was an early loss. he didn’t want to drink any of the river water or eat any of the meat they bought from ~suspicious~ men on the trail so he eventually died from hunger and thirst. like, you gotta eat. but he simply refused.

Daichi // i genuinely think he makes it to Oregon but then, idk tries to build a barn and accidentally lets the wood frame fall on him. like everyone knows him because he braved the entire Orgeon Trail then got K.O.’d by some 2x4s. rip.

Sugawara // he got measles. like who gets measles? you get it from contaminated droplets and Sugawara just can’t figure out where he might’ve encountered those. except for when he kissed that cow that he didn’t know was dead until he got really close. genuine accident, i swear.

Nekoma

Kuroo // cholera :( he was kinda peeved about it but Kenma caught him one night writing out a bunch of possible jokes to be carved on his tombstone. they ended up just putting the piece of paper on top of his burial spot and calling it a day

Kenma // actually makes it to Oregon. no one knows how, he didn’t even really try. he’s just really good at games, I guess.

Lev // another snakebite lookin’ ass. i think he genuinely just wanted to pet the snake and didn’t think anything of it when its butt rattled. he though it was an invitation like when cats purr. his body didn’t hold up much longer once the venom ran its course.

Yaku // honestly? madness. he didn’t die so much as he tore off all his clothes and abandoned his cattle and covered wagon to run off into the prairie and start his new life as a crazy mountain man. he just shouted “you’re all fools” one day and no one’s seen him since.

Fukurodani

Bokuto // ate some bad wild fruits. it wasn’t hit fault, he was really hungry and he got too attached to his cattle and couldn’t bring himself to kill and eat him :(( but he had a nice little trippy moment before he bit the dust.

Akaashi // y’know what, I’m gonna say it, he makes it to Oregon. and he THRIVES. he builds his house and tends to his cattle. because that’s what he DESERVES.

Aoba Johsai

Oikawa // HAHA he died of typhoid. and if you think this guy didn’t make the BIGGEST deal out of his death. it was absolutely shakespearean. like he was on the brink for three whole days. and he kept giving these long speeches to each of his friends and pretending to die in the middle. then he actually died in the middle of iwaizumi’s and it was kinda awkward.

Iwaizumi // I think he makes it to Oregon, but he like loses his arm to a bout of gangrene or something crazy. like it just rotted and then fell off. and now everyone in Oregon makes fun of him for only having one arm and it’s honestly kinda pissing him off

Kyoutani // let a snake bite him, just to see if he could take it. he could not. he died very shortly after but not before he could try to suck the venom out of his own arm. it was kind of terrifying, honestly.

Yahaba // another brave soldier lost to cholera. no one knows how he caught it and he just kinda bitches about it all the time. Kyoutani pushed him out of the wagon once and he sustained some pretty nasty head trauma from that so it really sped up the process.

Matsukawa // he and Hanamaki thought it would be funny to eat literally any mushroom they came across. obviously this worked against them at some point and they both started dying horrible deaths.

Hanamaki // basically when he and Mattsun were on their deathbeads, they gave an engraving on a piece of wood for both of them to be put at the gravesites bc obviously they’re gonna be buried together. it isn’t until they’re six feet under and the pieces of wood have been stuck into the ground that the group looks really closely and sees that the pieces go together to spell “PENIS”. classic.

Shiratorizawa

Ushijima // listen he just looks like the kinda guy to catch typhoid. but he doesn’t tell anyone that he doesn’t feel well, he just kinda coughs on the low and wipes the blood from the crook of his elbow. when he finally dies, everyone just kinda looks behind them and is like “where’s wakatoshi?🤔”. he’s dead, ya’ll, like four miles back.

Tendou // i’m sorry he’s got that sickly victorian child look you know he was one of the first to contract something deadly. i think he like caught multiple diseases. he was collecting them like pokemon: diptheria, dysentery, typhoid, you name it. the worst thing about him dying on the trail was the fact that his body couldn’t be donated to science. no one had any clue how he lived so long with so many ailments coursing through him.

Goshiki // he broke his arm. he BROKE his ARM and then DIED. yes, that can literally happen in the game do not ask me how. there was no foul play, no overexertion, he just 💀. sorry, buddy.

Inarizaki

Atsumu // he drowned. you wanna know how?

Osamu // drowned while wrestling Atsumu. it was a friendly quarrel turned nasty fight as they rolled into the gross river water. everyone kinda stood around and watched but they couldn’t tell when the flailing limbs were cries for help rather than thrown punches. swallowed too much water. guess it’s better than contracting double-cholera with your twin brother.

Kita // exhaustion. this boy doesn’t stop walking. everyone is begging him to set up camp or lay in the covered wagon for a little while but he refuses, he just wants to keep walking. yeah he eventually just drops dead and everyone’s actually pretty sad about it.

Suna // the kind of bitch to fake diptheria. he acts all achey and feverish and says he just HAS to stay in the covered wagon. he says he can’t fish or hunt or do anything and then when someone actually catches diptheria, he’s forced out of the wagon bc he doesn’t wanna catch it. he does anyways. good riddance.

Aran // yeah he was the one who gave Suna diptheria. he didn’t mean to get it, but it was a little bit satisfying to watch Suna cringe as Aran gave him a big hug and called them “diptheria buddies”. they had a nice little double grave though <3.

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franniebanana · 3 years

Text

CQL Rewatch - Episode 9

Let me preface this by saying we’re entering a period of episodes that I’m not that fond of. There’s nothing wrong with them really, but it’s just padding and a little bit of set-up for later arcs, but I personally think the set-up is unnecessary.

Anyhow, straight into it! I shouldn’t say “straight” when wangxian is on screen. I struggled to get a good shot, but the dichotomy between Nie Huaisang and wangxian here is hilarious to me. He’s such a good comedy act, flailing and being totally useless, other than being another warm body, but at the same time, he’s the only one really acting like a teenager here. Lan Wangji is always so cold and serious, while Wei Wuxian is a goof until he needs to be serious, but both of them are also extremely talented. We know Nie Huaisang isn’t an idiot, but I don’t get the impression he’s a great cultivator either.

I literally watched this scene this morning and totally missed this part. Lan Wangji stops Wei Wuxian from killing or attacking the puppets further, as he’s about to use his sword to defend them all. It’s a great little moment, actually, because it shows how Wei Wuxian is willing to do anything, but he’s not willing to murder innocent people if they can be saved. We already know, with all the Lan principles, that Wangji would not kill needlessly, but we don’t necessarily know that about Wei Wuxian. But he has morals, he has his own principles, and he’s not going to cast those aside for nothing.

Now, you could say he won’t do it now in the story, but what about later? What about Wen Chao? I’d say that’s totally different. That was revenge. And one of the things I like about this story is that it doesn’t shy away from revenge (something that a lot of Western media kind of disdains—we seem to be afraid to in any way make revenge out to be something good).

I can’t believe I managed to capture the exact moment that Lan Wangji used the Silencing spell on Nie Huaisang. I’m honestly really impressed with myself. Of course, it was totally by accident. I was initially going to just talk about how funny Nie Huaisang is again, because I love his flailing and physical comedy, and his expressions are fantastic. But can I talk about this glare that Yibo has right now? Haha, I love it. Again, if looks could kill. If I were Wei Wuxian here, I’d feel pretty satisfied for being the one not silenced at this moment. Honestly, it shows such a progression in their relationship: they’re really working as a team, no longer at odds with each other. It’s really apparent that they have become a team: it’s Nie Huaisang and WangXian—not Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji. There are also more moments where it feels like Wei Wuxian is really looking for Lan Wangji—like, it feels as if he’s more interested in the relationship than Lan Wangji. I don’t think it’s true at all, but that’s kind of what we’re shown. The thing is that Lan Wangji is so much more aloof and cold towards Wei Wuxian—very tsundere, I suppose. But of course, we know Lan Wangji is very conscious of Wei Wuxian.

I’m not going to pick on her specifically here, because overall, the fake instrument-playing is pretty hysterical. I do think she’s the worst at it, though, probably because she only does this in one scene or something. Wang Yibo has a double for a lot of the scenes where he’s playing the guqin, but what little we see is fine. Xiao Zhan is also okay—we know he isn’t really playing, but he does an okay job pretending to play. Like, his lip is on the flute. It kind of looks like Wen Qing doesn’t even have her lips on the flute—like she’s trying not to wreck her makeup. Anyway, I’m not going to harp (see what I did there?) on it—none of them are musicians.

Reminder to gif this part.

Any time Wei Wuxian comes to Lan Wangji’s defense is a good time, and coupled with a smile like this—my heart is melting, excuse me. I love these moments, because for just a few seconds, it feels like no one else is there—it’s just the two of them having a moment together. And Wei Wuxian is once again here proving how he’s loyal to Lan Wangji, how his friendship is worth something, and it’s not just skin-deep. I think Lan Wangji is touched here: the way his averts his gaze, as if he likes what Wei Wuxian is saying, but he still feels uncomfortable. Outside of his family, this is probably the closest relationship that Lan Wangji has ever had.

Wei Wuxian has a lot of cool magic, and it’s a shame we don’t get to see more of it. I like the idea that his talismans are more clever, if that makes sense. They aren’t just explosions or hitting people with waves of force to knock them around. He’s got golden nets, and talismans that can bind/bond people to each other, ones that can cause you to be pinned to the ground. It’s just very fun, and we don’t get to see a lot of that sort of magic in this world. Actually Lan Wangji has the Silencing spell, plus the body binding spell that he uses in the book, but that is, unfortunately, not in this series. And the first time you see it in the book is when he binds Wei Wuxian’s body so that he has to sleep right on top of Lan Wangji—great stuff.

WWX: So they are making use of my wisdom? LOL

Wei Wuxian stops to make a joke, saying he is most disturbed by the hallucinations because he has so many thoughts in his head—basically too smart for his own good here—and at the same time, poking fun at Lan Wangji, because he isn’t bothered by the hallucinations (ie. he doesn’t have many thoughts in his head). Okay, first of all, we know Wei Wuxian respects Lan Wangji a lot, so he is definitely joking, and it’s all in good fun. Lan Wangji rolls his eyes a bit, and he’s not bothered. He did, after all, tell Wei Wuxian to put the net over the other three so that he and Wei Wuxian could take care of the dire owl alone. He also respects Wei Wuxian and values him as a fellow cultivator and teammate. Second of all, again, Wei Wuxian is not an idiot! He’s smart! He’s clever! He’s not dumb! I don’t know who still needs to hear this, but I’m saying it again. I know it’s easy to put him into the typical BL “female” role: he’s smaller, he’s a bottom, blah blah blah. I honestly don’t like that at all. Every ship doesn’t have to be two opposites. It doesn’t have to be m/f, top/bottom, big/small, dark/light, smart/dumb, strong/weak. I’m aware of how the book is written and I’m aware of BL tropes in general, but I see two equals here. I like how they picked Wang Yibo, a shorter and younger man than Xiao Zhan, to play Lan Wangji. I like that they took out the fact that he has inhumanly strong arms. I like the different dynamic that it displays from the book characters. That isn’t to say that I don’t like the book—I love the book. The book is my favorite adaptation, both in terms of storytelling and in terms of plot. But that doesn’t mean that it’s perfect for me.

Anyway, enough ranting for now.

I love this shot. And I love how in sync they are in this fight—it’s like a dance. When I’ve heard about fight choreography in the past, I never associated it with the word “dance,” until I saw this series. I don’t know if it’s the costumes or the setting or the actors or what, but their motions are so fluid, so dance-like—it’s actually quite beautiful.

Oh, my god, look at that grin! I fucking love it!! Also, serious moment turns into a chance to tease Lan Wangji. I will accept it.

My sentimental heart loves how scared Wei Wuxian is for Lan Wangji here. All that time wearing the One Ring—I mean, holding the Yin Iron, is really wearing him down. (Sorry, I couldn’t help myself). But jokes aside, I love how Wei Wuxian is right there, instructing him on how to handle what’s going on and to not lose control, while the others are just kind of clueless as to what is happening or how to help. And even after Lan Wangji snaps out of it and says they have to go to the Chang Clan, Wei Wuxian’s expression still is one of great concern, and I doubt it’s out of fear for what the waiter has just told him. I think he’s just really worried about Lan Wangji. This is the first time that Lan Wangji has even been like this, even in the face of great danger, and Wei Wuxian is shaken by it.

Other episodes: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 |

#cql #the untamed #wangxian #wei wuxian #lan wangji #nie huaisang #wen qing #wang yibo #xiao zhan #mdzs #mo dao zu shi #sorry this was short #but like I said I'm not really into a lot of these eps until indoctrination starts #also I wanted to make a comment about how the last bit was like scooby doo bc all of them solving myseries #cql rewatch

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hiimsociallyawkward · 3 years

Text

a servant of two masters

hi friends welcome back to me aimlessly ranting about merlin. up today we have 4.06 and this episode. wow. literally just the title gives me everything i need and i'm absolutley here for the chaos that will ensue. hi bestie @lady-ofmagic-andstars

i love them in their capes

i want a cloak

dude the 'oh it's not gonna happen' and then it happens trope is so dumb but i laugh every time

notice how the knights ripped off their capes

dude people are falling off of horses and out

MERLIN

ok ok but how is he injured. ik this is rated for kids but i really dk how badly merlin is injured. it looks like just his shoulder but he shouldn't be almost dying like his yk?

:,) arthru making jokes

ok but i love arthur taking care of merlin

alskdjflsadk them trying to make jokes to make each other feel better :,)

stop arthur. stop telling the truth merlin's not dying here 😭

bestie vibes only deadass

HAHA

a s s

side note, the site i get my screenshots from- this picture has 61 views while others average maybe like 10-15?? perverts HAHA just kidding

sok i'm actually really curious as to what merlin's injury is

alsdjf;lasdfjsaldfjsaldf merlin making the rocks fall

idk if it's jut the angling but i felt like the enemies were way too close for merlin to create an entire rock barrier. i don't have any screen shot evidence but so you're just going to have to take my word for it

ok but like who even are these men. they were working for morgana trying to capture arthur?

and what's morgana going to do once she has arthur? kill him and take his place on the throne? remember how well that turned out last time she tried that? no one wanted her. idk idk morgana is just confusing as to what she wants

pls die agravaine

haha strangely fond of the boy? there's nothing strange about it

ok i laughed but i also felt bad when morgana splashed merlin awake and flailed around like a fish

dude merlin is so snarky here and i'm HERE for it

ok i like the knights being competent. thank you thank you

and now they're riding back into camelot with their capes on? you're telling me they traced back their steps to find their capes, dusted them off to make sure that they weren't too dirty and didn't have any leaves or branches still sticking to it before riding back to camelot? iconic

poor gaius. ok he's the worst but he does think of merlin as his son and this makes me sad

ok i have a dumb question. do you think merlin understands whenever other magic users are casting spells? ok i feel like this is a dumb question now. but like, is magic a language? are all incantations in a different language, so when other person who knows magic is watching you- they know what you're trying to do and such? i feel like "of course they'd know" but i'm basing that assumption on hp where everyone knows that alohomora is alohomora and where everyone knows that lumos is lumos. but what about here? does merlin know what she's incanting? can he slightly understand it even if he's never seen/done it before? is magic a language like latin, and even if you aren't completely fluent, you and parse together things and make an assumptions?

arthur is just so sad here

i just, i have to have these here

yes bby figure out that we have a traitor

gaius is not slick in the slightest. yes. look at the traitor king

wow morgana being able to bond with the snake? i wonder how

ok question, does the fomorroh have some sort of loyalty to whoever calls them?

✨kill arthur pendragon✨

ok that snake going in his neck is actually scary

pretty castle counter: 5

btw this is actually my zoom background sometimes. it depends from call to call but it changes between this pretty castle and peeta mellark

G E O R G E

ok i've seen all the tumblr posts but it doesn't get less funny. the 'merlin's missing and we can't find him so we're going to replace him with another manservent dressed EXACTLY like merlin so arthur feels better' makes me chuckle every time

i would like to have that for breakfast

i like the loyalty arthur thank you. i love the loyalty pls. i love that they're friends. like, i love the romance but i love just people being friends too

ok this whole scene. arthur wanting to look for merlin because he has to at least try, gwen just wanting arthur to be careful and to come back to her, gwaine being buds. i love all the friendships in this and just yes thank you

ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok i'm not at the hug scene yet but i know it's coming and i'm beyond excited

ok this sound track is so cute.

saldkfj;asldkfjasldkfsd

matching icons for you and your best friends

deadass if someone wants to change their tumblr icons so we can match hmu bc i'm 100% down with that

another pretty castle scene

SASSY MERLIN PLS

ok ik this is dumb to comment on because i feel like it's not tremendously hard to execute but i love the differences that colin made in regular merlin and fomorroh merlin. it's the best

they say it later in the episode but i find it hilarious how bad of an assassin merlin is

dude pls you're pouring poison in front of EVERYONE else?

BOG MAN. ok guys i'm calling you guys bog mans now.

ASLDJFALSDFJS THE JEALOUSY SCENE

i am cringey but laughing at the same time you don't understand why am i this childish

ok but arthur is being so sweet right here. i feel like he's not trying to be showy in front of gwen, i feel like he wants merlin to rest and that's so sweet. he's so patient right here and i love him

i miss the gwen and merlin friendship actually

dude merlin is roasting gaius so hard today

leon geeking out over weapons is so cute. omg he's such a tiny nerd i love him

laskjflasdfj THIS SCENE. this makes up for the stew jokes that i may or may not still be mad about

i love that the knights LITERALLY turn a blind eye it's actually hilarious

LOOK AT MERLIN BEING COMPETENT?? HE'S SO SMART WITH THE ARROW RIGGING THING

it's literally treason leon pls and you're laughing you're the best 😭😭

i wish we had a pervical back story arc

ok i think it's dumb that i laughed when merlin ducked but i stand by that

ok why do i feel bad for arthur a little. he's talking abt some semi-deep stuff. not deep deep but like, he's trying to ask for advice from his friend, his close advisor. he would've never talked to merlin like this is season 1-2 but here he is, talking about trust. and MERLIN is trying to MURDER HIM. yes. i admit it's a little funny when i'm just watching merlin trip over things and such, but when i listen to arthur talking i feel slightly sad

literallly. merlin's passed out on the floor and arthur doesn't even think anything is wrong

gwen's face when she knocked merlin out is so cute

oop. why is arthur standing in agravaine's door way like an absolute robot

cyes arthur. figure him out

i hate agravaine. i just want arthur to be happy. he's only trusting agravaine because agravaine is family.

stfu agravaine 'you're all that's left of my dear sister' SHUT THE FRONT DOOR

ok there's a repeat of the castle from earlier but i'll spare you

pls this bath scene is so awkward. tt not being able to trust anyone anymore and we're laughing at merlin but arthur's talking so sad and deep

pls this bath scene is so awkward. that's all the notes i have

again, i miss gwen and merlin

merlin is MONCHING on those berries. i'm craving berries now

ok but like. yk that pouch that gaius is using to make the forromoh dormant? what if merlin tucked it in his neckerchief as a precaution. i'm just saying.

aslfkjasdaskdjf the tavern

yall why did merlin have to stop his horse to drink the potion

i want the knights to have a cool band name or smth yk what i mean?

i like that merlin is still a little in the camelot red. it's not the same shade but yk what i mean

HAHA LEON AND PERCIVAL BEING PUSHED TOGETHER. I JUST KEPT ON SCREAMING SUBTEXT SUBTEXT

damn morgana wants RESUKTS. i dont blame her

the frist interaction with merlin and morgana in the hut is so awkward. pls.idek how to comment on it

deadass morgana's dress is so pretty.

magic fight! magic fight!

stfu 'rightfully mine' pls

hehe there's a leaf in his hair

ok i feel like i should've commented more on the magic fight but idk bro

so ik that colin was in this whole episode but it really only just now feels like merlin is here and i think that's fun

arthur is the cutest. i'm loving this dynamic you have no idea. i live live live live LIVE off banter. pls

guys i'm sad apparently i can only put 10 pics in a post but pls enjoy this one pic of arthur right here 😭

ok idk abt you but i'd love to hear jokes abt brass

agaragvaine pls die already

YOU'RE SUCH A PERV LITERALLY

AWAY

NOW

dude that last scene was actually really pretty and i'm sad that i can't attach it now

anyways thanks for reading my long ass rambles. but i'll be back next week to the secret sharer i'll catch you on the flip side

#merlin #merlin bbc #colin morgan #emrys #morgana pendragon #king arthur #bradley james #gwen pendragon #angel coulby #morgana #katie mcgrath #gwaine #percival #elyan #leon #gaius

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hailing-stars · 3 years

Text

@febuwhump day 21: torture

a phone call away

summary

“Tony,” he said. He opened both eyes just as Tony put the Gatorade and the pills on the bedside table. “What happened?”

“Don’t remember?” asked Tony, with a smirk that told Peter doom was imminent.

Peter stared at the Gatorade bottle, then looked down at the bright red cast on his arm. He wondered how he was expected to open bottles using only one hand. “This really sucks.”

“Yep,” said Tony. “Sounds about right. That’s what happens when you drink half your weight in alcohol.”

Peter copes with his post-snap trauma by drinking. Tony worries, and helps.

Peter opened his eyes, only to quickly shut them after being assaulted by the lights.

His headache blared to life, and his right arm was encased in a cast. He couldn’t remember what he’d done to earn this trouble. What he’d done to merit this rude awakening in Avengers Tower medbay, but he had a sinking suspicion it had all started with Flash and Abe bringing out the keg.

He groaned and pushed his head into the pillow and wished he was literally anywhere else.

“He’s alive.”

Peter popped one eye open and saw Tony by the doorway with Gatorade and a bottle of pain relievers in his hands.

“Tony,” he said. He opened both eyes just as Tony put the Gatorade and the pills on the bedside table. “What happened?”

“Don’t remember?” asked Tony, with a smirk that told Peter doom was imminent.

Peter stared at the Gatorade bottle, then looked down at the bright red cast on his arm. He wondered how he was expected to open bottles using only one hand. “This really sucks.”

“Yep,” said Tony. “Sounds about right. That’s what happens when you drink half your weight in alcohol.”

A memory hit him. One of the white hot pain in his arm, and one of having his head in the toilet, puking, while Tony hovered somewhere above him telling him to get it all out.

Peter groaned again. Maybe it was better not to remember.

“From the baby-monitor cam-”

“-really wish you’d stop calling it that-”

“-it looks like you were swinging under the influence,” said Tony, ignoring his complaint about the name, “and at some point you swung into a building, fell, hit the sidewalk and landed on your arm, all before trying to fight a trash can.”

“Did I at least win the fight?” asked Peter, miserably.

“You tell me.”

It was obvious, even to Peter, that he’d lost.

Peter vaguely remembered a swirl of streetlights, the impact of a brick wall, and flailing his legs and arms as he fell. It was clear from his harsh landing on the pavement that in his drunken state he hadn’t been quick enough to save himself from the fall with his web shooters.

“And if you’re a little foggy on the first part of your evening,” said Tony. “You might wanna turn your attention to Thomson’s Instagram.”

Peter closed his eyes, and muttered, “He didn’t.”

“Oh, he did,” said Tony.

“I’m gonna kill Flash.”

“If May doesn’t kill you first,” said Tony. “Or me, for that matter. What were you thinking?”

“I dunno. Maybe I wasn’t. It was just, a party, you know? It was fun. Was being the keyword I think,” said Peter. He lifted up his broken arm. “This definitely isn’t fun. How long do I have to have this on?”

“Forever.”

“Funny,” said Peter. He sighed. “So much for super healing.”

“Yeah, well, all that alcohol probably put a damper on your freaky spidey healing, so you’re just gonna have to heal like us normal folks, at least for a couple of days,” said Tony. “Which is just as well considering your aunt is probably gonna ground you.”

Peter groaned, threw his head back into his pillows, and stared at the unattainable, frosty Gatorade bottle. He tried to ignore his pounding headache, the way his eyes hurt and begged for the lights to be dimmed.

This hangover was torture. Though he probably deserved it.

“Do you mind, uh, opening that?” asked Peter, pointing at the Gatorade with his free hand.

Tony took the bottle from the nightstand, opened it, and handed it to Peter, who accepted it with his good hand and gulped down half the Gatorade in one drink. He left it open when he put it back down on the nightstand.

“Are you sure this was really just about a party?” started Tony. “That you really just having fun, because I -”

“-Tonnnyyyyy,” said Peter. The headache was torturous enough. He didn’t need a lecture to come with it.

“Kid, I’m just saying,” said Tony. “Take it from someone who was lucky Instagram didn’t exist during his party years.”

“I’m not you.”

“I know you aren’t,” said Tony. “But it can happen to the best of us, and Pete, this is the third time in a month you’ve been caught with alcohol. I’m supposed to believe there were times you weren’t caught?”

“You’re not supposed to believe anything,” said Peter. He closed his eyes, and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Can you dim the lights, please?”

Tony did what Peter asked, and dimed the lights. He sat back down in the bedside chair with a sigh. “I’m just worried about you. This isn’t like you at all -”

“-Can I please just rest?”

“Fine,” said Tony. “Fine. But we’re gonna have to talk about this sooner or later, and you know, I’m always a phone call away.”

Peter didn’t open his eyes again until he heard the doors just, until Tony was gone, and he was no longer at risk of having to talk about things.

Peter was supposed to be grounded.

May had reacted exactly the way Tony had told him she would, and sentenced him to two weeks in his apartment with only schoolwork and chores to keep him company. Chores that he couldn’t even properly do with one arm.

That hadn’t been such a big deal after a couple of days, which was the amount of time it had taken Peter’s arm to heal and for his cast to get taken off.

And when his arm became free, breaking grounding became easier, so he did, to escape his quiet apartment and his loud and menacing and threatening thoughts.

He crashed a party.

Someone at Midtown hosted it. He didn’t know who, really, and didn’t care to ask. He noticed none of his circle were around. Not even Flash, who usually got invited to every party and rarely turned down an invitation. He didn’t like it. The way parties and large rooms felt lonely and desert when they were absent of his friends.

Peter stayed only long enough to get a buzz going. It wasn’t the good kind, either. His thoughts stayed loud, only they were also swimming, and he’s sloppy as he stumbles around on the dark, New York street.

It occurred to him that was lost, and he was hit with that familiar dread that had occupied him while he was in space. That he may never get home. That he might disappear into the wind before he’s got the chance.

He shook and his breath came fast. He sweated, and wanted to cry, and wanted to be back in his bed or just stay in his apartment, watching TV with May.

“You know, I’m always a phone call away.”

The memory of Tony’s words broke him out of his panic, and slipped his hand into his pocket and fumbled around with his phone until he managed to press on Tony’s contact.

“Peter? What’s wrong?”

“I’m so sorry, Tony,” said Peter. He didn’t like the sound of his own voice. How desperate it sounded.

“It’s okay,” said Tony. “Where are you?”

“Lost.”

“Sit tight, alright? I’m gonna find you.”

They hung up, and Peter sat on a bench under a streetlight. He waited.

Peter didn’t throw up, but he wished he could.

He woke up the next day at Tony’s penthouse. He was nauseous, and shivered, even from under a pile of blankets, and he wished desperately that he could forget the night before. That wasn’t possible. His memories might have gaps in them, but he’ll never forget the paralyzing fear of being moments away from vanishing.

Tony must have been alerted that he’d woken up, because he pushed open the door to the guest room almost immediately.

“How’re you feeling?”

Peter sat up, slowly, and hugged the blankets closer to his body. “Like shit.”

“Sounds about right,” said Tony. “We still gotta talk about it, though. I let it slide last time, and it was a mistake.”

“My mistake,” said Peter. He shivered. “And don’t worry. I’m never going to drink again. Not after last night.”

Tony let the uncomfortable silence settle over them, and Peter didn’t like it. He had to fill the air with his explanation.

“Maybe I was using alcohol to escape,” he admitted. “You know it’s like sometimes my head is just so loud, and it feels like I’m going to be obliterated at any second, and alcohol numbed that. Made me forget.”

“Until it didn’t?” Tony had phrased it as a question, but Peter had no doubt the man knew where it was going. That maybe he’d been there and experienced it himself.

“Yeah,” said Peter. “Last night it just made anything worse.”

“That happens,” said Tony. “Alcohol magnifies your emotions. Not a great way to deal with your trauma.”

“Yeah, you’re telling me.”

Tony squeezed his shoulder in a sign of support, and there was relief written on his face. As if he’d been worried that entire time, but instead of helicoptering over him, had let him work it out on their own. Maybe they were both growing.

“Now the question is,” said Tony. “How do we prevent it from happening again?”

“I’m never going to-”

“-but you might. Shit happens, and if you don’t figure out a way to deal with these feelings, they’ll eat you alive, or make you turn to some pretty desperate solutions.”

“Talking to you and May helps.”

“Yeah,” said Tony. “But I think you may need to talk to someone else, like a professional.”

“You want me to go to therapy?”

“I think it would help you,” said Tony. “I speak from experience, I go, and it helps me, and if it can help me, it’ll help anyone.” He paused, chewed on his lip. “And hey, you’ll have someone to complain about me to.”

Peter laughed. “I don’t know if any therapist has that much time or patience.”

“Brat.”

“Just being honest,” said Peter.

“I’m gonna make you an appointment,” said Tony, quickly, before Peter could even properly make a decision either way.

“Yeah, okay,” said Peter.

He didn’t know if he would’ve agreed if Tony hadn’t made his choice so easy and clear, and although he was sure therapy would be difficult, he was content, thankful even, that he had people like Tony pointing him in the right direction.

#febuwhumpday21 #irondad #my fic #irondad fic #drunk Peter parker #angst #dealing with trauma

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