#like why does my heart decide to love ppl who don't want me and never get over it

[feralforfrank]

Hi!! Just wanted to start off by saying I love your writing. I enjoy it so much truly. Next I wanted to send in a request with one of the prompts you provided!

How about Rooster x reader with the dialogue prompt - "it's pitch black in here and I can see that you're blushing"

Much love ❣️❣️

drunk in love.

BRADLEY "ROOSTER' BRADSHAW X FEM!READER

cw reader has a hungover headache, thats it. FLUFF. NON-DESCRIPTIVE READER.

a/n so many ppl wanted a part two!! so here you go!

masterlist | taglist

The first thing you notice when your eyes open is the head-splitting headache you have. You have to close them immediately, as the curtain's in the room weren't shut, meaning that sunlight found its way inside.

The next thing you notice feel is the heavy mass wrapped around your waist and the breathing on your neck that sends shivers down your spine.

Oh God, oh Lord. What happened last night?

The images come to you faster than you expected. Bradshaw—your extremely hot rival, who you definitely don't have a crush on—bringing you home—to his apartment?!—changing your clothes, and putting you to bed. And then you'd done the unimaginable. The only thing you feared more than your superiors. You'd slipped up, calling him to lay down with you and cuddle you.

Holy shit, I'm in Bradley Bradshaw's bed, wearing his shirt, my back touching his bare fucking chest and his arm wrapped around my waist. Holy fuck, holy shit, holy fucking cow poop.

What do I do now? Do I get up? Or do I fall back to sleep? Sleep does sound enticing, but you want to look at his face. Wow—what the fuck are you thinking? Okay. Maybe looking at him for a bit doesn't sound that bad.

You manage to turn slowly and gently to his side, your head tilting up to meet his handsome and peaceful face. It's a rare sight to see him this relaxed. With your job and the stress you're always under, everyone has permanent frowns etched on their faces.

You trace his face with your eyes, taking notes of the faded scar on his right temple, long eyelashes and the curve of his nose. Oh, his lips look so kissable—all pink and plump. Tone it down a bit, you stalker. You've never noticed how perfectly trimmed his pornstache was before now. You have to stop your hand from reaching to touch it, fearing that he'll wake up and find you in this compromising position.

A few serene moments pass, where you hear nothing but your heartbeat echoing in your ears. Your eyes are shut, and you're almost asleep when you feel Rooster move. You pretend to sleep, but your ears perk up, listening to Bradley's every movement. 

He walks over to the window, shutting the heavy curtains. You can open your eyes now, for the room has been submerged in darkness. Rooster lays down again, his arm finding your waist again, pulling you impossibly close.

There's silence, and then there isn't. "I know you're awake."

God, his morning voice is so sexy. Jesus Christ, what am I thinking? Wait, did he just speak to me?

"Could feel you staring at me."

Your eyes open, and your breath hitches. God, you hoped he didn't hear that. But of course, he did. You're so close to each other, that he can probably feel your heart beating out of control.

You decide to play it off casually. "I have no idea what you're talking about." 

He snorts softly. "Oh, please. It's pitch black in here, and I can see that you're blushing. Can practically feel the heat radiating from your cheeks."

The embarassment is eating you alive. Bradley knows you like him now, and he'll make fun of you for it for the rest of your life. There's no way he'll ever let this go. God, why did you have to turn around? Why couldn't you have fallen back to sleep? Or better yet, gotten up, dressed and run?

"I can practically hear the gears turning in there." You hear the smile on his tone. "I like you too. Thought it was obvious, but I guess not."

"What?" 

"Go to sleep, pretty girl. I'll explain when you wake up."

previous | next

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[ taglist: @roosterschanelslut @maverick-wingman @amnmich @mattyskies @wildcole @gretagerwigsmuse @bespinnn @collaps3r @caldodemazapangourmet @oikawasblueearbud @rip--tide @barryswifey @fanboyluvr @spookys-girl @lonelywitchv2 @j-deimos @heywheresemily @avengersfan25 @piceous21 @sarahjoestewy-blog @n3ssm0nique @mouseymagines @xx-kate-xx13 @vaporub4ever @reading-rosa @marie1115 @dxvanadeline @plaboneruda @awesomebooklover17 @mxlsmith @mak-32 @torresbarnes @depressed-focker @kwanimations @magicstrengthandcourage @graysondanvers @danielmarie @giuliamunson @this-is-a-bad-idea @bordelhoe @melody-death @studentville-struggles @desert-fern @tw1l1ghtlvr @idkwhattodowithmylife67 @kenobiow ]

#bradley bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster top gun #bradley bradshaw x reader #bradley bradshaw fluff #rooster x reader #rooster fluff #bradley bradshaw fic #rooster fic #miles teller #miles teller x reader #top gun #top gun: maverick #top gun fic #fluff #rivals #frank writes #frank's asks

[hotchs-big-hands]

can i rant for bit cuz ugh why do all the men on dating apps suck?? i hate how some men really seem to fetishize plus size women. like when you're trying to talk with them and all they wanna talk about is sexual stuff from the get go 😡😤 like hello?!? im more than just my body?? ive never even met you dude. ive got a personality, interests, etc. like do these men think they're doing plus size women a favor by aggressively sexualizing them?

it honestly sucks so much. so in order to cope I've been fantasing about hotch 😏

like imagine dbf!hotch where he overhears you ranting about dating and the men on the apps and later tries to talk to you about it. he'd tell you that they're all boys and you need a man.after hearing how upset and objectified you feel he'd probably decide to actively pursue you. especially if you've had a will they-wont they thing going on.

i just really want him to seduce me and give me a reason to delete all my dating apps

❤️‍🔥

I'm so sorry this is so late but girlie I feel this so hard. I legit gave up on dating apps cuz it was just "let me see how big your tits are" "😜 wanna meet up and fuck?" Even if your profile says you're not looking for that, youre looking to date! I thought at one point I found someone who was chill and wanted to just go on a date but then 🧍 well, we won't get into that. All in all, ppl need to stop fucking fetishising fat ppl. It's dehumanising. Do we want to be desired sexually? Absolutely. But not just that tho. We want to be loved and accepted for who we are and how we look. I really hope that you do eventually find someone who doesn't just see you as a sex object, ❤️‍🔥 anon because you deserve it 💖💖

Dbf!Aaron Hotchner is sooooooooo🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭 OOOOOGH

He is fucking PISSED knowing you're being treated like this on dating apps. He thinks it's fucking disgusting that people see you as nothing but a fetish. He fucking adores you. He thinks you're funny, sweet, beautiful, kind and well, of course he thinks you're fucking sexy too. But knowing you're trying to deal with all this shit makes him angry.

So he does whatever he can to show that he's, first of all, into you very much so. But also that hes not after you just for "having a good fuck with a thicc girl". The thought of people treating you as less than human, just sexual organs because of your curves makes him fucking sickened. Man starts to rly make an effort to show he is interested in you. He tries even harder to make you smile and laugh, treats you to stuff, is extremely attentive if you ever vent to him. And he can see it's working, you've got a pep in your step, and you always have that adorable shy smile on your face whenever he talks to you or looks at you. Big fan of fixing a stand of your hair.

One day something changes, you come to him upset and frustrated and you show him the dating app. You vent about it to him all about the disingenuous guys on there only seeing you as a thicc chick to fuck so they can tick it off their bucket list. And so he hugs you close, kissing the top of your head and says he can't stand to see you so upset anymore. But he has something to say that could help.

You pull away, confused. And he's looking at you with so much tenderness your heart tightens. He smiles, brushing a stray tear from your cheek.

"Sweetheart, those stupid boys don't know what they're doing. They don't know how to treat a woman, how to make her feel loved and cared for and seen as more than just their body type. I... I want to know if you'll have me. Accept me to show you how you deserve to be treated."

You can barely string words together, it's cute. But he sees more tears again and he panics, thinking he's gone too far.

"I'm sorry, this was not appropriate. I-"

"Yes.. I- yes, I want you." You interrupt him. It makes him pause, staring at you for a moment as he studies your expression. You glance away, feeling shy again. "I only started using dating apps because I didn't think I'd ever get to be with you, Aaron..."

Oh, oh sweetheart. His heart is soaring and he pulls you close for a tight hug, swaying you gently.

"Sweetheart, you have me. I'm yours."

Needless to say you freed up a lotttttt of space on your phone getting rid of all the dating apps 🥰 plenty of storage for the incoming pics you and Aaron will take together from this point forward.

#❤️‍🔥 anon #aaron hotchner x reader #💌 ah asks

[8em-em-em8]

Music genius Steve won't leave my mind and now my brain has an entire story cooked so there it is (buckle up, you're in for a long drive)

+ Steve and Eddie bond after the upside down and Eddie, who was expecting Steve to call his music 'noise' or to exclusively want to listen to top 30 songs, notices Steve likes pretty much all kind of music, and Steve confesses he never really paid attention to it : his dad influence, think music is disposable and anyone pursuing it as a career is ruining their life, that's why he made fun of Tammy Tomson is S3 but seeing Eddie with Corroded Coffin at gigs/practices is making him change his mind.

+ Steve rapidly learns Eddie's song by heart and sings them, adapting the key to his voice and capacity, sometimes doing some impro. He's really good at it.

+ Other than band practice, Eddie has jamming sesh with Johnathan and Argyle. Johnathan plays the bass and Argyle has one of those cool electric keyboard that can do all type of sounds

+ (Argyle is rich, like, his family owns Surfer Boy Pizza, and he gets his own apartment in Hawkins and it's where all of them hang out most of the time).

+ Eddie start to teach guitar to Steve with his acoustic one, till one day Steve shows up with what he think is an electric one (he wants to be cool like Eds), but it's a bass, so now Johnathan also teach him.

+ As a good band kid, Robin also get dragged into all of this, she's always there but since Trumpet is not easy to add in their music she takes a fancy on drums. Gareth start to teach her and everyone can see he's got a crush on her. I think it would come out one night around a bond fire, when Jeff teases him about it. Robin looks at him to gauge his reaction but he's very layd back, he just shrugs whit a ''So?'' and the boys go crazy except that Steve seems worried. Eddie thinks it jealousy, especially when Robin looks at him next, but Steve just nods, very tense and then Robin comes out to everyone. Eddie's surprised Steve knew already and was fine about it but it makes him feel brave so he takes one more big gulp of liquid courage and announce that he's gay too.

+ after a while, Eddie starts asking Steve for his opinions when he writes songs, and Steve doesn't seems to understand why him, but he helps and every suggestion he has is good.

+ Sometimes they have really deep conversation about life and it's meanings and once Steve ask the traditional ''How did you know you were... You know'' and Eddie's been picking clues up for a while now, how Steve Gase lingers on some boys sometimes and other things, but he doesn't push it, only talking about his own experience.

+ So for Eddie, the logical following would be for Steve to write his own songs, but Steve is like ''Dude, I hardly can read and write and you want me to do music?!'' Robin immediately volunteer to write things down and when Eddie buys him a recorder two days later with a ''Now you don't have to write '' comment to go with it, Steve start to understand that his friends are serious when they say he's talented.

+ Corroded Coffin get spotted by a record at one of their gigs in Indianapolis. Quite quickly they get signed, and they have to go record an album in Chicago. Steve does all the driving because he claims the boys needs to have energy for it/ rest after, so they sleep in the back at all time.

+ On one of the trips to Chicago, one of the Corroded Coffin boy get wind of a gay bar opening in the street they work at and they all decide to go, at least to see how it is. That night Steve and Eddie kiss for the first time (it's not a relationship seal, they just talked a lot about Steve figuring his sexuality lately, and seeing all those ppl being happy makes him want to try so he ask Eddie if they can kiss. Of course the boy says yes, but he understands the second they lips meet that he's fucked (as in he's in love)).

+ After the first Corroded Coffin albums drops, it takes only a month for the boy's to get a US tour fully booked, Chicago is their first and last date and all of the party is there both time, standing in the front row. Their last is a Sunday, so they think they finally get to SLEEP for the rest of their life, but on Saturday, Dustin barges in their hotel room to drag their ass out, especially Eddie's. ''Dont ask and trust me on this one, you'll thank me later'' and they end up in a really small bar at Steve very 1st gig, with him on the guitar, Johnathan on the bass, Robin as their grummer and Argyle with his wierd keyboard. And the 1st song is ''Figure you out'' from DJO and Eddie's mesmerized, getting flash back of the time Steve admitted having no idea of who he was and what he wanted to do with his life, Eddie's telling him he had all his life to figure it out.

+ Eddie kisses him senseless after the wrapping up, saying to Steve that he's never gonna let him go again, that he missed him too much while on tour so now that he's an accomplished artist he's gonna drag him to do Corroded Coffin first part in their newt tour and Steve respond with something like ''I love you too'' while someone, the only person who hadn't already understood what was going on between those two (so probably like because he's too busy dealing with his own sexual crisis) is looking at them with their jaw on the floor.

#i like the idea of famous misic husband #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #robin buckley #stranger things 4 #stranger things #st4 #corroded coffin

[themistas]

i just think that shin soukoku gaining awareness in the beast universe could lead to , who knows, them looking for each other in the different universes that dazai mentioned (or whatever they are, i spedrun (spedran? speedran?) through beast and can only recall the Absolute Angst and Absolute Fate (all by DazaiTM) of it), and perhaps even further

in some random universe abilities are dead and atsushi, after having a moderately decent life in some random orphanage, is busy filing out his taxes, but there's this gloomy taxes agent that won't stop staring and eventually goes up to him (pulls him into a corner, muffling his startled scream with a hand, threatening to kill him -- romances always start this way)

'stop screaming it's just me. the guy who's been going after you in every universe. not to kill you, no. to unite the way dazai wanted us to. oh dazai is WHAT in your universe? that does not matter. yes. your violin teacher wants us to unite. why you? i don't know... maybe you fucking died as a vampire in my universe??? oh, you're sorry?? that's not gonna bring you back!!'

akutagawa does not exist in this universe, did everything he could to save gin from a drunk driver when they were teenagers (and in the universe where he lives, well -- atsushi doesn't learn about him until he's fifty-seven) (and in the universe where he learns about him much earlier, they never get along, and they only interact for six months) (and in another budding universe, akutagawa bumps into him when he's five. and he never really pays it any mind, until he once again bumps into a guy at the cemetery, staring at his best friend's grave, gone too soon and forever remembered) (he could not stop the driver this time, was away with a friend and can never shake off the guilt, the despair that reside in his heart)

it's a little sudden, it's not at all what atsushi planned to do on a sunday -- but after all this world lacks akutagawa, a very strange angry man who will not lean away from his front door, who's way too convinced 'he's the one' to go look for another Him. and his world lacks atsushi, had him become a vampire then promptly pass away.

how did that happen -- akutagawa will only tell if atsushi agrees to come with him, but atsushi isn't stupid, and if he closes his eyes -- he thinks he can imagine it, him pushing akutagawa out of the way; him being in the way, rather than him (for his live means a lot, to ppl and - him) -- buying akutagawa time, each and every time, so that he can live on and carry their goal on his broad back

it's silly: he doesn't know him, might just never do, not in the way the Real atsushi did -- but this atsushi has nothing to care about, not much apart from taxes at least -- and this akutagawa has the guy from the grocery store being an amazing chef in his universe, so amazing he won't mind buying dinner to a copy-paste (yet so familiar, yet so alike his atsushi) of his partner

it's an easy yes, an easy pact sealed by shaken hands -- it's a trip into another universe, and through fights and disgruntled confessions (through kindness and wordless exchanges) they learn to see the other from another universe, learn to understand what the other went through

through grief and a not-a-violin-teacher dazai, through caught-but-cured vampirism and badly hidden, eventually confessed love they learn to coexist, and the world is saved and all is well once again, the world balanced by their explosive chemistry

ps. though atsushi dies in a few universes to save akutagawa, akutagawa dies like a hundred times saving atsushi. i have decided so and i know it to be true in my heart

#i will never write this #bsd #textmistas #im just foaming at the mouth how beast basically went eeaao and im just supposed to take it without pointing out the obvious #dazai did it all for sskk like?? ok??? wth?????? this is not possible i am dreaming i am insane this is insane #akutagawa ryuunosuke #nakajima atsushi

[desudog-gone]

Grrrbv ;'_';

Just saw a mutual who randomly blocked me (old blogs, i only saw them bc i moved sense then. Not purposfilly block evading) some months ago after we were really close (like, shared stuff personal with and gave free stuff on flight rising type of close) and it just. I can't feel fulfilled about it. Why. Like why did they do that. They didn't even like vague about me so I could tell what it was about. It just feels terrible. Usually I don't really feel this way about when people find it time to go, but it literally happened 100% randomly. Sometimes I consider asking them (of course, very consciously will make it sure I'm okay with any answer) because it really confuses me but I also just think that seems... childish? I don't know. I won't call it ableism but it kinda felt that way, just randomly blocking a very int disabled mutual and then doubling down on being buddy with the person who said I had the skills of a child among other statements that are just nasty over something that was nothing. It's just weird. It makes me feel really sad and sick inside and I just don't get it. I can let other stuff go idk why this one's so hard. Well I do, because I cared about them but was apparently overnight disposable? But it's happened before.

Idk. Hard to fight my fear of abandonment and issues trusting others when everyone I confide in either lashes out at me or wordlessly blocks me on every platform and every blog I've ever owned. I have a really hard time talking to people and trusting them these days. I kinda only talk in depth to ppl anymore 1 on 1 like on discord if I'm convinced I'm not the "weirder" one of us.. even mutuals I had and didn't block me just kinda faded away from me lately and it's just very uncomfortable and sad. Idk.

I really try not to feel like this or think like it but it keeps happening and i feel unsafe and upset. It makes me feel really sad. I just feel confused and sad. It makes me scared after I get vulnerable to others. I feel like I get retraumatized every few months. And I'm just too stupid to be allowed to be okay. I "have the conversational skills of a 5 year old." Its okay to not tell me why or when you leave, right? Insulting me for daring to sleep is okay because I'm too dumb to understand words right? Idk. I won't call it ableism. But I feel unsteady.

I really appreciate the freidns I have. The only problem always have. But I feel like I've been taught that no matter what I'm not worth appreciated. I just existed to make my mutuals laugh or to listen to their vents (but not mine) or to engage in their special interest (NEVER mine.) And when they get another friend I'm worthless idiot who can be thrown away. I don't belive that but it feels like people mean that...

I just wish I knew. I always wish I knew, I'm happier when people are meaner to me because I can process mean and angry to me. I can process that I know what it means and I can get over it but the quiet unannounced disappearance is bad and so scary and I think its worse because my disability. I'm sorry I can't tell. I can't tell when you started to hate me. But I'm never sorry that I was kind.

So many times I am worried now because I opened up. I regret it every time now. It's so scary. I regret ever opening my heart to people in dms about my joys or things that upset me it's so so scary when they hate me.

Sometimes it feels like everyone hates me. It's not true but I feel bad inside about people a lot.

I try not to look scared and I try to be brave for myself. Whenever it happens I get scared. Because I let people inside and it means they can hurt me once they decide I'm no longer valuable or human enough to be kind to.

And it like... everyone does.. ! It's not "I wont" it's "not for now".

I know they're talking about me. I know they want to hurt me if they haven't already.

I feel like talking is wading through MUD.

I want to love people stronger. I want to love people happy and confident.

Sometimes I forget not many people want this for me

[zylian]

Zy is annoyed so quick summary on Planet in Vitalasy stream

Planet and vitalasy talk and they disagree on a lot of stuff

Vitalasy leaves the call annoyed and decides Panet is a problem and says he never wants to be put on a team with Planet ever

vitalasy than proceeds to test out the prison

he put planet in the unfinished prison and kept one tapping him until he almost got banned so he would stop talking since they disagree on stuff

Planet said "not again" and said he would do anything to make him stop

Planet gets out and Vitalasy tells Planet to stop interfering and blames him for his team break up

Planet see's the zam book which says "I never had teammates I could trust til now :)" (the one with the trust apple book) and Planet laughs saying "you kept more than Mapicc and Ro ever did" than vitalasy gets upset.

Planet says let's agree to disagree and Vitalasy gets super upset, leaves call, and than vitalasy talks about the past and says 3 players ruined it all.

————— Zy opinion —————

“3 players” well that's probably Mapicc, Ro & Zam so good thing those three don't hate each other currently

Vitalasy who is the closest to Spoke & Ash not bothering to see what their doing is the saddest thing I’ve ever heard. Spoke tormenting ppl and makes Vitalasy leader while Vitalasy wants hear nothing from anyone.

No one chooses their labels yet every person with a different opinion (who is mortal) is apparently his worse enemy (omg!)

He called himself the servers punching bag… I want him to name the people who hate him and the ppl who don’t cause from whatever I hear ppl blame him for trying to be a hero after the damage is done

The end portals? Yah they called him a tyrant so? Bro loves to contradict himself sometimes

Kinda glad Planet was the one to talk to him cause if it was anyone else Vitalasy wouldn’t have stopped. Why does it have to be Planet almost getting banned for him to stop raging smhhhhhhh

He keeps bringing up the past and I wanna bash my head into the wall like everyone heard u ok, yes you never wanted this to happen but what matters is the present and apparently running away is the answer. Than RUN AWAY, omg stop lingering in between, u can’t explain ur side (glitch wise) and than stick around other players

If u want to mind ur business alone than dont give ppl reasons too ??? ur already stuck being blamed for the exploits you can’t just run now

It makes sense why Subz just sat there and agreed during vitalasys rage/ rant cause wtf Planet isn’t a good but having his own opinion shouldn’t make u that upset

Subz who was ACTIVELY HUNTED chose to not learn the powers and that says something. Vitalasy who can’t log in to save his team and chooses to run away instead ? Ppl with less hearts and no gear still managed to save themselves. 3 heart trio got tormented A LOT yet fight with what they have, Zam got tormented SO much, they both probably have worse scars then Vitalasy in this season and Vitalasy choses to be left alone now. Did he not learn from Subz’s pacifism arc????

“Once the plan is in action you won’t be able to hit me anymore” ?????????? He hates the purpose of the server so badddddd

he becomes a god to be left alone, wasn’t Ashswag already considered a god and didn’t he still get people bothering him? Despite them knowing he would fight back. People want to fight eachother and especially a fair/ challenging one cause thats fun!!! The whole point Mapicc tries pulling Subz out of his pacifism was to fight cause when he fights Subz it’s fun, it’s challenging, he has to focus.

Vitalasy pls open ur eyes I swear it’s not that hard pls there are already ppl on the server who are in similar boats as you and ppl who have already run away

Also he keeps bringing up how he gave 8 hearts to Mapicc & Ro and they betrayed him. HE BETRAYED HIS OWN TEAM IN THE END FIGHT. He’s blind and even after his own team forgave him (Red & Pangi specifically) Vitalasy still treats it like he’s alone. I’m starting to think Pangi dragging him into fights was what a normal teammate would have done. Bro can never ask for help I swear

GAH I’m upset

#zy is >:( #zy summary #zy is hating #lssmp rants from watching twitch

[whorecunture]

tw: suicide

nothing really matters at all i just found out i probably wont be graduating on time and it's over 3 elective credits that don't have anything to do with my degree and it's coinciding w a lot of other shit right now. like realizing i mightve just had ADHD and that's why i felt so different and weird all the time as a kid even when i tried really hard to control it and be likeable

and w this its just like. five fucking years of getting straight As, i could count the amount of Bs ive gotten on one hand but like literally none of that matters. every time i rushed to class, every late night trying my best to make sense of material, putting my heart into the work i was doing bc i really believed like it mattered and was powerful but the truth is that it doesn't matter

school is the only thing ive been able to understand and do well in. and it doesn't even matter if i move onto something else bc that next thing isnt steady either and it's like for what? five years of that, im broke, im lonely, im sad and i go through life so scared and stressed and for what?

my parents. my mom already said if i died she'd get over it and i think suicide would hurt my dad but i think he'd be okay too. i am really scared at what irl do to my little brother. we dont talk as much as id like, he's very quiet and a really great kid, but he's like 5 hrs away and doesnt see me often so im hoping that helps

im so selfish bc even the good friends i have as much as i love them, ik they'll be fine - things keep going, you meet new ppl, u find other reasons to smile. im just too tired to find it. and i don't think it'll make me happy. anther best friend won't suddenly make me happy, a partner that loves me won't make me happy, nothing will bc ive noticed all my life even when i was a kid, i always felt very sad. i think now it might've been that ADHD i just could never get what i was doing wrong and why ppl disliked it so much. and i think that left me w the fear i live w today that makes everything so hard.

it's not that i dont believe life comes in waves, that every new day is an another opportunity to be kind, to be happy, that mourning will only last for a night, it's just that i don't care anymore. even those good times, they're just a quick, minuscule moment where things are too busy for me to remember how heavy and jarring the sadness in me is.

i sometimes think that the adults who told me i was mature were just seeing that sadness.

To kill myself, I'm deciding between either taking Nyquil or renewing my prescription for my sleeping pills and swallowing it down w alcohol. I think I would want to clean my house down first. The real scandalous things i'd pack up in a bag at my doorway so a friend could take them before my parents come for my things (i leave everything to my family to sift through but Amari gets first pick at everything and dibs on what money i have left). then id pick a night, get high, watch something easy and funny, maybe spongebob or drag race, then id swallow everything while lying on my couch.

literally nothing in life matters. it doesn't matter how many times i recreate myself, it doesn't matter which god i do/dont pledge my allegiance to, it doesn't even matter how others feel about me. whatever they feel now will pass and even the parts of me that stay with them, they'll be able to live with despite everything.

nothing matters and im too tired to pretend it does so i can make it to another day.

#mental health #suicidal ideation

[chaeryybomb]

nct dream reaction to their idol!reader girlfriend being shipped with another idol

anon: nct dream reaction to their idol!reader girlfriend being shipped with some other idol :) love your works btw. and thank you for this in advance

pairing: nct dream x idol!reader

genre: headcanons, fluff, crack

warnings: mentions of insecurities

a/n: dhsjdj technically my requests are closed rn but I decided I would write this out so I hope you enjoy this!

mark lee

confused boi™

tbh he wouldn't even notice you were being shipped with another idol until another member points it out

you were a special guest mc for the show and fans saw the cute interactions you had with the boyz juyeon

and soon enough fans started shipping the both of you together

in reality, you and juyeon were just high school friends and you were glad to see him again

fans on the other hand,,

mark didn't realise you were being shipped with juyeon until doyoung pointed it one day

and mark was all like

( ・◇・)？"nani? y/n and juyeon???"

he would then search up ynjuyeon on twitter because cough yeah

and found a shit ton of edits of the both of y'all

and now he's sad :((

he's sad that because no one shipped y'all together

"isn't your relationship a secret???"

"yeah but still :((("

mark sweetie y'all have neve interacted on stage before fjdjdndnd

he knows you love him and would never cheat on him

but boy is he going to be a pouty baby when y'all hang out next time

literally all he's going to say is:

"why do they ship you and him together?? why not me :(("

"mark they've never seen us in the same room before"

huang renjun

unbothered king™

at least that's what he tells you fhdjdj

he found out through a vlive fhdhdjj

it was one of the usernames and the username was like ynxyanan_shipper

and renjun mf squinted his eyes like

did I read that clearly ಠ_ಠ

he's like yn and wHO

chenle was beside him when it happened and chenle was like what's wrong

and renjun points out the username

and chenle starts lauGHING BECAUSE HE FINDS IT SO FUNNY

renjun smacks him on the head to tell him to shut up DHHSHDD

obviously he would take a screenshot of the username and sends it to you

and he's like

short king <3: do you hv something to confess to me

you: ,,, my love for you??

short king <3: blocked

you: HAHSAHS IM KIDDING

tbh you find the situation honestly really funny

cause you and yanan aren't exactly friends? you're more of acquaintances than friends

and you made eye contact one (1) time with him by accident at an award show and suddenly you're being shipped with him

when you call him the next time to hang out, definitely expect him to be salty about it fjdjfjd

"hey are you free to come over today?"

"I don't know, why don't you ask your BOYFRIEND yanan"

"renjun istg i will break up with you-"

lee jeno

oh baby boy is gonna be so so confused

he's going to be even more confused because you're being shipped with itzy's chaeryeong fhfhfjf

see you and chaeryeong were featured in an episode of a reality tv show once

and the both of y'all immediately hit it off and your friendship was just adorable

so y'all kept interacting every time y'all see each other

and y'all are now nicknamed as the 4th gen gfs because y'all are so adorable???

like the chaeryn ship ur most popular ship ever

so jeno is so confused?? like why is his gf being shipped with her??

he's like a whole ass puppy okay

you, on the other hand, find the chaeryn ship really cute so you don't mind it and you jokingly call chaeryeong your gf once or twice on live before fjdjfn

whenever you tell him that you're hanging out with chaeryeong, he will pout at you and give you his best puppy eyes

like he will cling onto you and try to convince you to now to go

it works like 13% of the time and you would cancel plans with chaer but most of time it doesn't and you would end up being late jhdjsh

but it will slowly become into an inside joke between y'all

like yk that one meme

"this is yn my girlfriend and her girlfriend chaeryeong"

kjdhkjshfs yeah that

but in all seriousness, jeno is really unbothered about you being shipped with chaeryeong because it basically has the same energy as him being shipped with jaemin

whenever y'all are having play fights, you jokingly threaten to leave him for chaeryeong jdsfjds and he immediately stops and says that's unfair

pls shower him in hugs and kisses later

lee haechan

definitely makes a fuss about it

i mean he knows that you aren't going to leave him and all but is he going to be dramatic about it? yes, yes he is

he finds out by himself because he was probably on twitter stalking your hashtag

when he suddenly stumbles upon and edit of you and ateez's san

he's like O.O wot is tHis?

screenshots the edit and sends it to you

hyuckie: yNNNN

hyuckie: THE LOVE OF MY LIFE

hyuckie: BABY

hyuckie: SUGAR BUM

hyuckie: DAISY PIE

you: what in, the ever loving fuck, is daisy pie

hyuckie: *sends screenshot* ARE U CHEATING ON ME

you: hyuck that pic is clearly edited

hyuckie: I KNOW BUT ARE YOU????

you: i-

he makes so much jokes about it that you literally have to shut him up with a kiss

jokes on u reader he's doing this on purpose to get those free kisses

the jokes stop when you actually finally meet san during a game show and shippers are like omg they finally interacted

and the amount of ynxsan edits just,, grow

haechan acts even salty about it and whines about why fan don't ship y'all together when y'all have made eye contact during the golden disk awards bc he was being a lil shit hdsjhfjds

"hey what if i keep staring at you during the melon so we can get into a scandal?"

"hyuck this is supposed to be a secret relationship-"

"yeah but-"

jokes on u he actually does stare at you at the next award show and thankfully did not get into any scandals, but fans started to ship the both of you!

na jaemin

the true unbothered king

literally does not care that you are shipped with someone else

because he knows that he is yours and vice versa

and plus you love him a lot so

he finds out from chenle, who did it out of spite because one day chenle was bored and wanted to cause some chaos

boi basically ran up to jaemin to shove an edit of you and treasurer's junkyu together and went like

"look hyung! ur gf is being shipped with someone eLsE"

"oh that's weird"

"rigHT"

"I thought people shipped her with treasurer's hyunsuk"

chenle is like

HUH???

"aren't you like,, jeaolous??"

jaemin just shrugs and says "hmm, not really"

jaemin knows that you are good friends wth a lot of idols because you're a social butterfly

so he truly doesn't mind when you get shipped with other idols bc in the end , he's the one holding you in his arms

plus he knows the edits and shippers are mostly harmless

and he trusts you

so he just fucks around with chenle jkldsfj

chenle is still confused bc he wants to rile jaemin up for fun but failed hjdshf

zhong chenle

if you thought haechan was dramatic, then you better buckle up for chenle's

so you see

fans already shipped u and chenle

like

y'all already have a dating scandal

and both companies tried so hard to defuse it

see you are an mc for a music show and you were interviewing nct dream

chenle, being the lil shit he is, kept giving you the heart eyes the entire time

and 6 months later, y'all got caught by dispatch on a daTe

ofc both sides were panicking but chenle was enjoying bc he's like "yeah this is my s/o and what abt it"

but y'all still had a dating ban so sm was this close in kicking him hfdsjfh

fortunately, they were able to cover it up as someone else so there's that

so chenle is aware that fans shipped the both of you together

so when he sees you being shipped with stray kid's jeongin

he was like "HOW DARE THEY-"

calls you to complain about the ship for 3 hours

and that is how you found out as well-

literally you don't even know jeongin so you just let chenle complain about it

he goes on and on about why fans should continue to ship y'all together so when he reveals the relationship the fans will be surprised but also not really at the same time-

"should i get into another scandal with you?"

"chenle no-"

park jisung

oh baby boy is going to be very, very confused

i mean he knows that shipping is a thing between fans

he's just confused why ppl would ship you and p1harmony's keeho

like you have never interacted with him so why would fans ship the both of y'all??

the dreamies mostly tell him to not take it serious but the chenle and haechan would egg him on

"get into a dating scandal with them"

"guys no-"

he wouldn't tell you that it bothers him because he doesn't want you laughing at him, worrying over a small issue

so honestly, it lowkey eats him up on the inside

until one day, you basically force it out of him because he's been acting weird for the past week

he finally confesses about the what's bothering him

and you tell him that you wouldn't have laughed at him

you know shipping idols is a common thing in the industry and sometimes it's uncomfortable knowing it when you're already in a relationship

but you also tell him that it's basically harmless because fans can't really force the both of y'all together

jisung would be insecure about the relationship because it's kinda of his first? so he just doesn't want to mess it up

just reassure him a lot and tell him that you won't leave him

and as time goes by, he just gets used to the shipping

#nct dream #nct dream imagines #nct dream reactions #mark lee imagines #renjun imagines #jeno imagines #chenle imagines #jaemin imagines #park jisung imagines #nct x reader #nct dream x reader #mark lee x reader #renjun x reader #jeno x reader #jaemin x reader #chenle x reader #jisung x reader #nct imagines

[fairydxll]

I just want to say a huge thank you for 1k. This is such a big milestone and I’m so happy to be here. I wanted to do something special for 1k so I decided to do a prompt writing challenge! This is my first time doing one of these but I am so excited to get started! I really hope that you ppl actually join this, but have fun!

I will be making a masterlist with everyone’s pieces on it! monique (@velvetcloxds) is also having a writing challenge, so go check it out!

m.list | ask

₊˚୨ 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫 ୧˚₊

send me the character you will be writing about along with the prompt type and # (pls send through an ask, this is the only way I can keep track) all will be answered privately !!

★‧₊˚ 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬 ʚ♡⃛ɞ

- pick 2-3 dialogue prompts from angst, smut, fluff, or multiple to include in your fic (below cut)

- must be reader insert! no character x character, unless it includes reader (i.e stucky x reader, marauders x reader, etc)

- Can be any character from Harry Potter or the MCU

- must include a cut if 500+ words

- pls use warnings accordingly so that this challenge can remain fun for everybody

- include the prompt type + # in the description of your entry

you must use the hashtag -> #rue's 1k challenge and tag me to make sure I see it and add you to the masterlist.

if you have any q's pls feel free to ask !! There is no deadline for this challenge so go crazy !!

🖇·˚ ༘ ┊͙[Dialogue Prompts] ! ˊˎ

Angst

1. "We could have had it all, but you had to go fuck it up."

2. “After all this, do you still love me?”

3. “Why are you lying?”

4. “I don’t think there are any tears left inside of me. I cried them all for you.”

5. “Did you really think I wouldn’t find out?”

6. "I loved them, and now I'm going to kill them."

7. “So from the bottom of my cold, dead heart, screw you.”

8. “Why does everything have to be a struggle with you?”

9. "Is that too much to ask for?"

10. “Your place is here.” + “Then why do I have to go?.”

11. “Why are you acting like this?”

12. “Do you miss us?”

13. “Maybe you should just leave, now.”

14. “Stop! Just stop it!”

15. "I thought you'd never come back." + "I couldn't stay away."

16. "We're not just friends and you fucking know it."

17. "I can't breathe when I’m around you!”

18. "Please come home, I miss you."

19. "I loved them more than anything in the world. Now they're gone and it's my fault."

20. "I don't have a choice."

Smut

1. "You're adorable when you beg. Do it again."

2. “Oh no, there is only one bed, what will we do now?”

3. “Oh, can you feel this?”

4. “Do you want to take it off or should I do it for you?”

5. "Why don’t you show me that new thing you mentioned?"

6. “Your moans will wake everyone up and I’m fine with that.”

7. “Who would have thought that this is something you’re into?”

8. “Tell me what you would want to do if we weren't here right now.”

9. “I could ruin you.” + “I know.”

10. "I don't care what you do, just fuck me." + "If you insist."

11. "What's the magic word?"

12. "Oh, I could do so much worse, darling."

13. “I think you lost your underwear somewhere.”

14. “Your hand feels much better than my own.”

15. “Maybe you could use that mouth for more than just talking shit.”

16. “I know I should care about the reason why you’re naked in my bed, but I will just enjoy it while it lasts.”

17. “I said moaning, not screaming! They’re not going to think we’re having fun, they’ll think I’m murdering you!”

18. "I know you're half asleep, but I'm horny."

19. "Stay here and don't move. I'll be right back."

20. "You come out here looking like that, and expect me not to get a boner."

Fluff

1. “Don’t act innocent when we both know where your mouth was two minutes ago.”

2. “I cannot find the words to describe how I feel about you.”

3. "Stay here tonight."

4. “It’s so cold, you should hold my hand, so it doesn’t freeze.” + “I’m not that cold, I can give you my gloves if you want.”

5. “Do me a favor and don’t start a war while I’m gone.”

6. "I thought we were smarter than this."

7. “Relax, nobody saw me..”

8. “You don’t exactly look like an international spy.” + “Yeah, well that’s the point.”

9. “One kiss is just never enough.”

10. “You don’t have to like me, you just need to pretend you do.”

11. “Stop calling me Princess!” + “I apologize, my Queen.”

12. "Don't tease me or I'll take away kissing privileges."

13. "Is that my shirt?"

14. "Stop whining, I'm just braiding your hair."

15. "You are my new favorite pillow."

16. "Go to sleep." + "But I wanna cuddle."

17. "I will protect you with my life."

18. "You're gonna want me one day, and I'll be here when it happens."

19. "Stop waking me up in the middle of the night for kisses."

20. "I love it when you're clingy."

guys pls join this, I'm counting on you !!

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ tagging moots + those who might be interested

@harryssmommy @enchqnting @natashxromanovf @peterscurl @dracossweetprincess @songofpolaris @couldibeanymorechaotic @queen-asteria04 @sereinegemini @sarahisslytherin @itsmentalillness @selenesheart @dr4cking @pottahishotasf @velvetcloxds @artxmisss @promenadewithme @mwahforpeter @ameliasbitvh @eloquenceflores @cupids-crystals @riddlesia @ladyvesuvia @mellifluousart @justanawolf @mendesxruel @henqtic @indigoh4ze @silverdelirium @amourslover @hey-there-angels @dorcasmeadowesx @electriclocean @peppers-analytics @eunoniaa @arcaneslut @bellatrixscurls @underappreciated-spoon-321 @lonelyhe4rts @wolfstar-lb @gothboutique @rorybutnotgilmore @sweeterthansammy @pansydaisy @angel4you @sapphireplums @mullthingsoverinthehotwater @jackys-stuff-blog @myalupinblack (whoops i hit the tag limit)

#rue's 1k challenge #harry potter fanfiction #star wars fanfiction #marvel fanfiction #Harry Potter #Star Wars #marvel #mcu #maurauders era #lightning era #mcu fanfic

[redxblueihateloveyou]

Am I the only one who doesn’t get why some (tw) are shitting on Haru and Rin separately just for the fact that they reciprocate each others feelings? Because it’s not the feelings they wanted them to reciprocate? Just curious because I'm new and recently entered the fandom. And since when miscommunication in between means that they don't deserve to be happy at the end? Because you're an idiot when it comes to love, doesn't mean you're a bad person. I came from chinese bl and it's weird to me.

Hehe welcome to the madness, perfect time to join! Yeah, tbh that's the thing in the fandom that always bugged me the most. The fact that some act like if you don't reciprocate someone's feelings, it makes you a bad person. I always found it incredibly cringy when ppl in real life for example make ppl feel guilty for not feeling the same way and make you feel like shit bc of it. I don't get why you have to apologize for that or feel bad, if you never ever gave him any hope or anything in the first place.

Nowdays it's thankfully a rare sight already in this fandom, bc most already grown and see perfectly what's truly healthy and unhealthy, it's just tbh only the same 3 accounts ppl keep sending me that are still on that, who also think that Haru is literally possessed in the last movie so I don't see the point of like arguing with ppl like this. It's just they're always getting extremely angry when Haru wants Rin as if it's his fault that he feels this way and always go about it like he is inconsiderate of Makoto's feelings. Implying that they're mad that he doesn't feel that way about Makoto, while Makoto does. I'm same as @tododeku-or-bust for example said here (idk what fandom brought this on, but just in general) also do not get what's appealing about this kind of relationships in the first place.

If they shipped it in terms of like it's mutual I'd get it, but they go on about how Rin or Haru are bad friends bc they're not in love with their best friends... like ?????? I didn't know you owe it to your friends to have romantic feelings for them.

In real life if you found out that your bestie feels that way for you while you don't reciprocate, it's a burden, that'll make you feel uncomfortable and at times guilty when you shouldn't technically feel that way. So putting on someone a burden of "I was pining for you all along", when you know they don't feel the same is giving me this feeling of cringe. So I personally do not get what's enjoyable at seeing it like that in Free. But to each their own kink lmao.

It's like... is Haru at fault for the fact that he was Ikuya's first love too? I do not get it really. Like he doesn't have to take responsibility for everyone who falls for him and he doesn't owe anyone to reciprocate their feelings. Even to Rin. Like if he didn't feel the same way for Rin, it wouldn't be his fault either. But since he does feel the same way for him, it's like... good, great, happy for them.

Like once again if someone believes that Makoto and Sousuke are unrequitedly in love with Rin and Haru, that's not rinharu fault. Haru literally never ever lead Makoto on EVER. He never ever did anything that would make Makoto believe that they're more than friends. He was always honest about everything. Like when Makoto thought that he went out to see him, but Haru just wanted to see the sunrise, he told him just that. He never encoraged anything, he refused to live with him and never wanted. I do not get why it's supposed to be his fault that he doesn't like his friend in that way. If Makoto has some unrequited feelings for him and decided to hang up on this, it's his own life choice in my opinion.

It's like saying that Onodera and Takano for example don't deserve to be together just because they unintentionally hurt each other and got separated for 10 years bc of misunderstanding. This argument is like typical Yokozawa life position aka "but I was there when he left you heartbroken for several years, that means you MUST pick me". As I've said before, that's just not how it fucking works. And just bc they couldn't explain things to each other normally, doesn't mean that they don't deserve be happy now. Being idiots is not a crime.

Or if you came from chinese bl, lets go "Guardian" for example. Zhu Hong also was on about how "why you love Shen Wei, not me, I always did everything for you and I was always there, I even wore heels bc you once said you liked those etc". Like he never asked her to do this, he never gave her any hope, he was beyond rude and open about the fact that he's not interested, he never did anything to make her think she had a chance since the beginning. Just bc she decided to dedicate her life to false hope that maybe one day something might change is not his fault. It was her choice. Why Yunlan should feel like shit bc of that I do not get personally.

I'm just buffled bc like Haru for example is the most caring about other ppl's pain person, but they call him selfish and rude bc of the way he is with Makoto at times, not even realising that it IS in fact what means being kind sometimes.. to not give someone a chance when you know you don't feel it. I was always saying this like since forever, being kind doesn't mean for example giving everyone second chances, loving everyone, wanting to be friends with anyone etc. In some situations it's not being kind, it's being stupid or even not being a good person. Once again... offering someone friendship after he openly dissed your friend and you see that he's not in any position to talk back is not kind. Or if someone cheats on you constantly, but you always forgive them it's also not you being kind. It's you being stupid. Sometimes you have to be harsh. It's for the greater good.

And like I saw several times stuff like someone under scenes where Rin has his eyes for Haru only, commenting like "oh great, look at Rin being inconsiderate of Sousuke's feelings again. Can't believe you guys find this romantic." I mean, if in their opinion Sousuke is in pain from being Rin's friend, he can end it, it's his choice. It's not Rin's fault that he thinks of him as just his friend. So thinking that Rin is an asshole bc each time he simply hangs out with Sousuke he's a selfish bitch is fucking insane. I'd feel extremely bad if my best friend was seeing it this way for example. It's like hella ugly.

This annoys me also bc of the fact that Rin, the person who at the age of 12 single-handedly saved his family from falling apart after his father's death, who's an amazing friend to Sousuke and did everything to make his happy after he found out about his trauma and always checks on him first and cries about his shoulder, who in the late evenings taught Rei to swim, when everyone else gave up already xD, who was looking after Nitori during his training, who pretends to walk the same road, just because he's scared to let Gou return alone in the evenings, the most amazing son and brother, is suddenly an asshole just because Haru is in love with him, but not with Makoto. I mean, thats just... huh? Like I dont mind you ship what you want to ship, it's like to each their own crayons for real. But like dissing them and call them selfish just bc they only see their friends as friends and don't want anything more is weird to me.

As for the fact that bc of the misunderstanding they don't deserve to be happy, that's just idiotic. I mean, lets punish Wei Wuxian and Lan Zhan too just bc Lan Zhan couldn't voice his real feelings back then and bc WWX misunderstood him. Lets ship WWX with Wen Ning instead. Nezumi is cancelled, he doesn't deserve to be with Shion. He left him. Takano should stay with Yokozawa, Onodera is trash. Wu Xie is trash for wanting to be with Zhang Qiling too. It doesn't matter why he leaves, it only matters that he always does. I can't believe he doesn't see that Pangzi is there with him all along xD. What an ungrateful trash of a human being I can't even.

And anyways btw both Rin and Haru are not ideal human beings in any way (otherwise I wouldn't love them this much tbh xD). But their flaws are definitely not what for example mh shippers usually blame them for. You can argue about their other imperfections easily. Like being stupidly stubborn for example. I won't point fingers here, Haru lolz. Or literally anything else.

My point is you can find what to trash them for logically, if you wanna. Do it smartly tho. Otherwise you make your ship look bad.

And I once again say what wise person said about his relationships and about the fact that not being able with someone he loves hurt him and 'why is he doing this to himself' he answered: "it's not on him. my happiness and my pain is for me to handle". Everyone decides for themselves. This is why for example Haru was so broken about voicing this to Rin and didn't have any intentions to tell him that in the first place. Bc it's not right, if you're not sure that it's requited. Technically he has no right to blame Rin for making him fall in love with him and then leaving in the first place. It's not Rin's fault really, that he made him feel what he feels for him, it's ultimately Haru's problem. That's why he feels has no right to blame him in the first place. I mean, he doesn't know that Rin feels the same, that means saying to him "you break my heart each time you leave" and making him feel bad about it is technically wrong. That's why Haru to himself said "no, please, don't say such things to him". Everyone for himself decides who deserves your 5, 7, 800 or 10000 years of your pain. It's your decision. It's your life. If Haru feels like Rin is worth it, then you have no say in that matter really. The only reason we call Rin an idiot or Haru an idiot is because we know they feel the same, so we can. But blame someone else for not feeling what you're feeling is not right.

So like even if you feel like Makoto and Sousuke have feelings for their friends, blaming Haru and Rin for having feelings for each other and not for them is beyond weird. And there's nothing wrong with putting someone you love first, every bro/sis gets it. You can say bros before hoes all you want, but like Lan Zhan might just drop his bro for his hoe, if he was given a choice. Would it make him a bad person? The fact that Wu Xie chose to save Xiaoge before Pangzi makes his a bad person? My point is it's not all that easy.

I just feel like many ppl in this fandom are very weird about many things. Either because they do not get what it's like to go through some things or maybe they just do not get that no matter how cheesy this sounds love is not that simple. I mean, for example not all selfish is bad, sometimes like in Haru's case for example not being selfish is also bad. Bc if he finally asks for what he wants, he will make both himself AND Rin happy.

To be angry at Rin bc of the aftermath of his father's death and s1 I never had it in me, after knowing everything and how adults handled it. If some of Sousuke's fans bc of Yakusoku and the fact that Rin found his salvation in Haru bc he helped him to move forward after getting his family out of this hell alone and that Haru was the safe haven that made him happy in this moment of his life, want to trash Rin for the fact that he "neglected" Sousuke, its like your opinion. I personally do not get it. Rin doesn't owe Sousuke anything. It's not his fault again that Haru's existence helped him to feel better.

Just like not everyone will get why Haru in 1x12 was so happy about the fact that he could help Rin. To be that special somebody for someone who can "save" you in moments of your life like this, especially if you love them is an incredible feeling. And no, your bestie isn't always the person for this job, no. I don't see why people do not get that I guess, that's all. But we all have our own opinion on everything, so...

We same as you do not get it since forever, but its like it is what it is in this fandom. I personally just have another life position on stuff, so I'm very far from that point of view they have.

#answered #anonymous #rinharu #harurin #free! #nanase haruka #rin matsuoka

[wistfulrat]

a 4-part rec list of my fave drarry fics - the thrillers, dramas, soft bois, and wankbanks getting me through 2020′s shitstorm

[ for my fellow fledgling drarry stans! the drama list is here and, well. like i didn’t initially intend to go off in the mini-reviews beneath every rec but it’s just that you can't nOT yell about drarry as classic literary foils!! also it’s my dumb sideblog so i decided there are no rules and i get to be annoying about good writing.

but rly, the whole premise of the drarry pairing is shaped by this genre and if the ~serious world of serious published writers~ weren’t absolute cowards, they would admit that drama fic authors have contributed more to the genre than the average shit you can find at your local chain bookstore. so that's that on thAT. & if you love a fic here, don't forget to follow the authors, leave kudos & comments on their work, send them nice msgs bc they do all this shit for free xoxo ]

part 2: dramas

mood: for when I need emotional catharsis and maybe 7 hours to sob/brood about loneliness, the cost of love, & the perpetual fear of being truly known

includes: angst, hurt/comfort, reconciliation fics. it’s cruelty o’clock folks and someone is about to say/do something Fucked Up that they can’t take back. but don’t worry!! there will be a Reckoning feat. hamlet-worthy monologues, ugly truths, unbridled rage, trauma, insecurity, and just a fuck ton of tears!! but maybe even tender apologies and mended things.

(Un)wanted by @aibidil​ - 36k - E | Ginny's pregnant, then she's not and Harry's single. Harry, again with no family, doesn't know what to do with this turn of events, or how to find a new life—post-war, post-Ginny, post-abortion—in which he belongs. He doesn't expect that life to include dancing to the Backstreet Boys with Hermione and Draco Malfoy. A story of finding belonging in the unexpected. | --- can a fic be tender and unflinching at the same time? bc this story strikes that balance rly well and for a piece about unwantedness, it is incredibly humanizing. ginny holding her own, draco being gentle but not letting harry play victim, hermione calling harry “hazzah” and just the way this friendship insists on the validity of found families even when harry is spiraling?? and you’re forced to consider that no one has the monopoly on fucked-upness and that doesn’t absolve us of the ways we hurt each other but it means that everyone has the same potential to be better after being broken. goD JUST READ IT, OKAY.

Blood Magic, the series by @houseofhebrideanblacks and @thestralsofspinnersend 335k - E “Later that night. . .Draco wondered at the depths of magic, its breadth and scope. The ways in which life pervades and eludes death, the ways in which they endure all manners of small and large deaths within their lives.” -- if you don't read any other fic on this list, i hope you read this series bc holy shit it’s breathtaking. harry’s a recovering addict, draco’s recovering from abuse, and in a cottage within the forbidden forest begins an unlikely partnership as the boys take up the tedious work of healing. there are thestrals and everyone's in therapy. there are whole chapters of cottagecore drarry. it's a beautiful exploration of how we bare the immensity of loss against the miracles of birth and regrowth. 

Ship of Theseus by GallaPlacidia - 18k - T “A ship in a full sail, a ship in a state of decay, a ship that had been rebuilt, slightly different. A repeating cycle. “What makes the ship the same?” asked Harry. “I don’t know. There must be something in it that lasts across the changes.” -- DO YOU KNOW HOW THIS QUOTE LIVES RENT FREE IN MY SAD, SAD BRAIN. DO YOU KNOW HOW I LOSE SLEEP THINKING ABOUT THE FUCKING SHIP OF THESEUS. it’s a memory loss fic and everything is so unFAIR. you want to murder harry sometimes bc he’s such a shiT and you suffer through the ways he questions desire, penance, redemption, true love. and by the end, you want to believe in those golden slumber lyrics: “once, there was a way to get back home” 

Yours to Keep by @dracoismytrashson​ - 135k - E i love the university setting, i love getting to see harry and draco’s first forays into a real LGBTQ community, the class and race structures outside of the wizarding world. i love that this is the context in which they’re allowed to confront the shittiness of PTSD, anxiety, depression etc. as they come together and fall apart against each other’s traumas. it makes the ending feel earned af. “Baby, we’ve been easing into it for a decade.” -- my god this line

Away Childish Things by @letteredlettered​ - 153k - T  this fic is devastating. like, completely forget whatever reticence you might have towards a de-aging fic and read this. the de-aging premise allows the author to cut through the ways harry and draco hold each other at a distance and you end up with these stunning moments of clarity where they’re truly seeing each other for the first time. and suddenly everything makes sense. i won't spoil it here but there’s a scene towards the end where harry is talking to hermione and ron about realizing the first time he felt what its like to be loved and I fucking SOBBED. an all-time fave fic about learning how to belong.

Had To Be You by @lettersbyelise​​ - 59k - E a genuinely excellent slow burn about absolute fucking morons who refuse to express their mutual love over the course of literal years?? HOW MANY TENDER MEET-CUTES DO 2 GAY IDIOTS EVEN NEED. a car ride a bookshop a street corner -- when harry met sally is my enemy. but you know what? this fic is masterfully written, it’s an epic tale of unexpected friendships and the inability to say the things we feel. also its very much also a soft boi fic if not for the Major Fuck Up that pushes it into drama territory for me. so worth the turmoil tbh.

Hurricane by phrynne - 120k - E auror partners terrified of love. it’s a fic about walls - where the emotional landscape of this fic is occluded by dishonest words so you feel the tension play out in hollow voices, shuttered looks, emptied eyes. it’s like watching two ppl get flayed alive in slow motion and everything is SHIT for a little. it’s mean, it’s ugly, it doesn’t let you give the characters an out when they’re being cruel - to each other and to themselves. but harry and draco are two violent forces hurling toward each other’s walls and the inevitable reckoning comes and it’s so very worth the ending. the hospital bed scene to rule all hospital bed scenes.

Returning Tides by @zigster-ao3​ - E  “Is my timing that flawed? Our respect run so dry? Yet there's still this appeal That we've kept through our lives” --those fuCKing ian curtis lyrics in the summary!! p a i n. why do i put myself through getting-back-together fics knowing full well i’m gonna be Sad As Hell during the not-together portion of the story?? we are all unfortunately hoes for heartache. anyway this fic is beautiful. draco’s a dad and recently widowed, harry has a thestral reserve, the settings here are stunning. a story about grief and love that lingers.

A Piercing Comfort by @talithan - 44k - T “There is no objective scorecard. There isn’t anything that a person does that tips the balance from ‘deserving’ to ‘undeserving’, or vice versa. A ‘deserving’ person will not run out of worthiness after a set time of happiness and have to then go about working to deserve it again. And an ‘undeserving’ person does not have to suffer at length before having the opportunity to be ‘deserving’.” -- the heart of this fic. harry’s in therapy, facing depression, and learning how to accept love he doesn’t think he deserves. (also draco is harry’s therapist but yes, that power dynamic is handled ethically-well imo and addressed in the author notes I promise!!).

Borrowing Courage by @xx-thedarklord-xx​ - 70k - E |After years of being a Magical Artist and painting for other people, Draco decides it’s time to paint for himself for once. The secrets pile up as he tries to unravel the mystery of his relatives but the only thing he didn’t count on was having to go to Potter of all people for approval.| --god i love this fic. the thing about drarry here is that they never mean to hurt each other but they do. they do and draco’s trying to do the right thing and he wants so badly for good family but harry’s never rly stopped grieving sirius and it’s this whole unintended mess of festering wounds forced to heal. everyone needs a hug. also ron/blaise pairing and ron+draco’s friendship here is everything!!

Reparations and the sequel, Foundations by Saras_Girl - 320k - E | Harry is about to discover that the steepest learning curve comes after Healer training, and that second chances can be found in unexpected places.| -- incredible. harry and draco’s dynamic as healers, the cast of original characters, the boys learning what it means to trust each other, draco building a rehabilitation center, harry falling in love with him, and “meus fabula est mei ut dico: my story is mine to tell.”  i cry

The Ties that Bind by phoenix_writing (not on ao3) - 61k - T | Upon Andromeda’s death, Harry and Draco are given custody of Teddy. Their lives will never be the same.| -- harry’s got major abandonment issues and he’s just trying to be a good co-parent with draco but everyone is being the woRST and you want to murder them on behalf of harry. but then, the boys learn to listen to each other and god it all becomes so tender. also harry has a gay panic. things are awful but it all works out. -

[part 1: thrillers | part 2: dramas | part 3: soft bois | part 4: wankbanks]

#drarry #drarry fic #drarry fic rec #drarry dramas #im so sorry if this got long but also #I have too many Thoughts #all I do is cry over two sad gays #its pain o'clock sweeties #time to Sob about the mortifying ordeal of being Known

[dianaburnwood]

LUST: First Impressions

Here we gooooo

ok i swear this woman's voice changes in gameplay???? anyone agree???

Level 1 (the only one!!!):

I started collecting keys, and got the clues "a veil of smoke", "through which I dance", "finest red in hand", "I am she, who's", so after those I found the right admirer for Lust.

Gotta say, having 47 play Cupid is a surprising take on this. Why does he care about getting people together? Lust calls 47 "Eros", the Greek god of love and sex (or, more precisely says Wikipedia, the god of passionate and physical desire).

Lust does say that people want trust, power, love, without earning it. And these are 47's thoughts, so...... Does this mean he believes humans need others, even him? To have that human connection, earned? If not, he's thinking about it.

(OK the way he grabs her face is hot. 47 wants in)

Lust says "I'll never forgive you if you pair me off with some fraud." This woman is Lust, but this is 47's mind. Is our boi scared of getting his heart broken???? :(

The clue game was very good, I enjoyed it. I can't believe this is only one level though. Like it's not even an escalation in that case? And there was no surprise at the end, like... what?????

So I immediately replayed it.

The safe locations and clues are randomized, so that was fun. The blinding darts in the crossbow are disappointing, but I guess it plays into the whole "love is blind" thing, with Eros striking at targets with love's darts.

OMG tho, Lust asking 47 "Is this your love language, pet?" when he kills the pretenders uhhhh yes killing ppl for someone is his love language sdfgshdj

"This is why they'd never put you on one of those dating reality shows," lmaoooo

If anything, this level really compounded 47's aloneness for me. He's just left alone to watch them. That poor bb

Overall:

Very tame when you think about what could have been, but I like the psychology of it.

I also adore this one room concept with everything else open!

The room looks stunning. This really does play like a dream - the beautiful ballroom type set-up in the middle of the club, the music from Ark Society, the tango from Mendoza, etc.

The way Lust talks about 47's "pretty blue eyes" you know that man knows he's hot

I spent ages just walking around tbh, this place looks amazing. I kept hearing these whispers as I did? And the whispers don't come from Lust, I heard them while standing in front of her and it wasn't her. I am pretty sure the whispers are saying "hey handsome. hey! over here"

It was so creepy lol plus the wind that kept blowing through??? And some people are dressed in winter clothes and furs...???? Fuck cabin reference lmao

Gotta say, for all my complaints, I am really glad that IO didn't chicken out and decide that this was 47's "lust for the kill" or some bullshit. They made Lust about lust, romance, love, secret feelings, etc. That is the only thing that really clinches the deal for me, plus of course Lust being a red-haired woman who 47 literally thinks is a pale imitation of Diana I mean holy shit that line alone says everything we need to know lol

#hitman #seven deadly sins #lust

[samshogwarts]

🎃👻🎃 HALLOWEEN 2020 SUPRISE 2.0 🎃👻🎃

(pls ignore the tiktok logo on the left)

First of all - that's actually not the Video I was planning to cut. But since I have to stay the weekend at the hospital and not allowed to use my computer here, I have to chance my plans and have to use tiktok to cut at least a little video. Believe me, it broke my heart to use tiktok instead of my usual cutting program. And so the pictures are without the planned Effects, I am sorry :(. I planned to make a Hphm Halloween MC costume video. Every MC is another magical creatures, ghost or what ever. Hope you are OK that I use your MCs without asking 😅. And I will not finished the original Video because I want to finish the first chapter of my fan comic finally <~<.

-------------

MCs I used without asking 😅:

Elaiza Schuyler as the yellow rain kid from ES @annabelle-tanaka-official

It was your idea for the costume. I hope you are OK how I use it >~<

Arjun Singh as mumie @hogwarts9

I was searching for a macigal creature for Arjun and listened to old 90' series opening and "Mumies alive" appear. Does anyone knows the show? I loved them when I was a kid, so I decided to make Arjun a mumie. XD

Kyril Vasile @kyril-hphm / @kyril-simping as Red hood

Why does lolita clothes suits Kyril so good? It was so much fun to draw him in this dress. And the wolf's head too xD

Conor O'Donnell as Frankensteins monster @unfortunate-arrow I want to choose something special for Conor, but I didn't found anything what suits him well. But than I thought about classic "monster" and don't know why but I choose Frankenstein.

Sara O'Donnell - as a Doll @unfortunate-arrow

To be honest, Sara is like a doll in my mind, so it was easy for me. Dolls are scary but have most a sad background story. So I think it suits Sara. ^^;

Carewyn Cromwell as Banshee @carewyncromwell

I love the storys of Banshee. Especially the version of her amber cry if a member of her family will die soon. And what is also very important for a banshee? Her voice! So I thought the Banshee would suits Carey well.

Luna Silver as Vampire @lunasilvermorny

LUNA!!! We were talking about her "costume", so as you said I made her a vampire. And it suits her very well! And it was so much fun to draw her hair!

Helene Adler as Sucubbus @heleneplays

I want to draw Helen for so long and finally I did it! >~< And I instantly thought a Sucubbus would suits her! I even try to make her sexy (but I have no talent for this 😅)

Finn McGarry as Davy Jones @theguythatdraws

I am still in the hphm potc AU phase and I like the idea of Finn as Davy Jones. So I try my best to draw him! And let's be honest, Potc AU Samantha would make so much jokes because of his hand and face.

Angelo Lancaster as Angel of the Death @angellazull

Pls tell no one that I totally forgot his wings! >~< and I use your picture as inspiration but chance a few things, like his hair color so his picture will be not just white Grey and black. But it so much fun to draw Angelo! 😍

Tu Ling as Kitsune @wangxianforever000

Haaaarrrr~ finally I was able to draw Tu! I want to draw her for so long. Hehehehehehehehe. And Kitsune are one of my favorite magical creations and if I know right, she is actually a fox demon or am I wrong? 🤔

Night Rheia as Dementor @nightrhea-hphm

Also someone who told me which costume her mc would wear. First I made her skin with normal skin color, but.... I don't know it looks a bit boring because the special effects in the video are missed. But I hope you still like it.

Wendy Gordon as Selkie @drinkyoursoupbitch

Wendy!! 😍 It was clear for me to draw Wendy as a Nordic creature. And I like selkies very much. I know they are actually not evil, but I thought Selkies would suit Wendy and I try to gave her a unusual pose for me (and Whiskers xD)

Ethren Whitecross as Pyramid hat @hogwartsmysterystory

First of all - I know we never interact with each other and you don't know who I am, but Ethren is one of my favorite MC and your blog is for me one of the big three (the three blogs, why I start my blog) Q-Q but enough fangirling.

Did anyone played Silent Hill 2? I remember when I was a teenager and played the game the first time I screamed so much when pyramid hat appears and he was my nemesis for years xD and this my Frist try to draw a little more muscles *cough cough* hope you don't mind I used your MC.

Keira Jones as evil mermaid @hphm-brooke

Keiras hair as so much fun to draw! While I was drawing her I was asking myself if a mermaid need glasses? And if they do, how do mermaids that's? Anyway, I try to draw not a typical mermaid since there are fairy tales about mermaid where they are more evil and dangerous. And I like that more. A typical Ariel mermaid would be to normal.

Vixen Mcmahen as crazy clown @rosievixen

Aaaa good old horrors clowns! It was from the very beginning clearly for me to draw Vixen as a horror clown. When I start drawing she reminds me first to much as Harley Quinn, but I am happy with the result in the end. And her face expression Oo I am surprised by myself. Hope you like it too.

Danique Winter as the women in white @morningstarinwinter

The women in white is one of my favorite ghost. They are many different storys about her, but in the end she is alsway a woman who was betrayed. Personally, I like the version where she helps ppl if they get lost. And yeah... I thought it would suit Danique and it was very funny to draw her. I lobe to draw long hair! Hope you like it! *-*

And last but not least - Samantha O'Connell as Grimm Reaper. Yes, it suits her and her story. And I added a little Easter egg. The mask she is holding is her mask as a Ghost agent. The time were she was the most dangerous and able to bring pain and death to her enemies.

Still sad I can't upload the original planned videos with all original planned mc's. But my body says no. So well. I will make the best of it 🤷‍♀️.

Hope you guys like it. Will post the pictures in two extra posts.

#hphm #hogwarts mystery #hphm mc #harry potter hogwarts mystery #harry potter hogwarts game #hphm jacobs sibling #hogwarts mystery mc #harry potter oc #samantha o'connell #hogwarts #other people's mcs #helene adler #finn mcgarry #Tu Ling #conor o'donnell #sara o’donnell #elaiza schuyler #angelo lancaster #kyril vasiley #Luna silver #Keira jones #carewyn cromwell #night rhea #wendy gordon #ethren whitecross #arjun singh #Danique Winter #vixen mcmahen #hphm halloween 2020 #hphm halloween

[spacemamaa]

hi ate jaleen! i totally agree with everything you said esp the part abt the yt readers. i find it interesting how a lot of ppl have their own understandings abt TFs and i've seen a lot of them talk abt "physical sensations" like you did. i'd wondered myself if the guy i've dealt with in the past was actually a TF. tbh i never experienced the physical sensations you've mentioned but i did very much feel a weird sense of familiarity with him and never in my entire life as an introvert had i ever been that comfortable just being myself with someone as i was immediately with him. other than that, my heart and stomach would hurt so bad whenever i feel anxious abt anything that has to do with him.

i only started learning about spirituality and the term TF after we had a falling-out. we first met at uni when we shared the same class. we didn't have an instant connection bc at the time i was into someone else and we were just group mates for our lab activities so we didn't rlly talk much. it was only after abt a year or so when we shared another few classes (for the 3rd time) that we became friends. i used to hate myself a lot and suffered from anxiety and depression to the point that i would physically hurt myself. he was the first person who taught me how to love myself and introduced me to LOA and all that. basically, he was like the catalyst to my healing journey which only began after we had our first falling-out. it's unbelievable how one night i was just bawling my eyes out and begging for everything to stop hurting—i was so desperate for a change bc i was beyond exhausted from a lot of things + i couldn't bear the physical symptoms i felt when we weren't okay. and then, as if a switch had been flipped, i became a totally, inexpicably, different person just from reading a few lines from a self-help book i discovered that taught abt spirituality. a couple of weeks later, him and i were back to being friends. i decided to stay for a while (even when it hurt) bc i knew he needed someone who understood him but i promised myself that i would leave the second i was certain he didn't need me anymore. my journey to self-love continued, however, it did slow down. when he hurt me again for the last time i could endure, i finally cut him off. i knew we both needed to work on ourselves alone, esp him. he could act like a total dick sometimes lmao but, in the end, he owned up to his crap and understood why i had to go. we genuinely wanted the best for each other.

i honestly stopped caring abt labels a long time ago. i don't think labeling our connection will change how much i already love him unconditionally and beyond i should be allowed to and i know he loves(/d) me too (maybe just not in the same way tho he did tell me he was into me). everything you said abt the signs to look out for resonated with me (except for the physical sensations you mentioned)—the telepathy thing, mirroring, repeating numbers, runner and chaser dynamic (for a short period of time) and all that were there. it wasn't until we had a falling-out for the second time that i was able to focus on myself without any distraction. i'm embracing and becoming more and more of my true self each day and i've faced my childhood traumas/demons/issues and have even learned to forgive myself and others. it's incredible how it's like i transformed into a completely different person from who i was before meeting him and yet somehow i wonder maybe it's all just a coincidence? maybe the reason why i'm getting synchronicities is bc i started attracting them when i became aware of them? i certainly doubt i'd be who i am today if i hadn't met him and i'm curious to know whether a "karmic" partner can trigger spiritual awakening too. despite the ridiculous amt of love i still have for him, i don't exactly like him—at least not the person i left—and i love myself more. i low-key don't like the idea of him being my TF but at the same time if i actually have one and were to meet one in this lifetime, i hope it's already him bc ain't no way i'm going through that much hell again lmao i only want the very best for me bc i know i deserve the world the same way everyone does.

anw thank you sm for answering my prev ask and if you've read all of that!!! 😂 you're one of the few ppl whose opinions i genuinely respect a lot and enjoy listening to. i rlly admire your hard work and i hope you keep doing what you love doing! 🤍🤍🤍

((i'm currently broke so i can only watch your ads on yt as much as i can in return (at least for now) i hope that's okay. 😭😭😭))

Aww!! Thank you so much for supporting me. it is definitely not necessary for you to purchase a reading to support me. Either way I appreciate you for tuning in and even asking these questions. 🤧💘

I forgot say that there are fake TFs, too! Idk if it’s a test run or something, but it definitely is a thing from my experience, so I have become wary of labeling my experiences as such! That’s why I tell people not to get sucked into these things or to obsess.

I wish you luck on your journey and your person. :3 No matter what, it’s a fulfilling experience that is absolutely necessary for growth. ✨

#ask #anon ask

[musashi]

are there any stories/facts about your job/coworkers you can comfortably share? maybe something cool they did/you did with them recently? anyone that stands out in particular among them, without getting too specific for. clear reasons?

what's cheeseburger up to atm? any notable stories or anything about him recently, or has he been just living his best life as usual?

which of the skyloft NPCs do you particularly like? for arguments sake, this is excluding the more story relevant ones, so no groose + his gang, no zelda obviously, etc.

as an opposite to that, talk about groose! i've always loved him as a character, and the bits you've said about him and his relationship with link and zelda is always great! also, any notable kin memories you have of groose? especially things that occured after he left skyloft, or even after the demise fight. what did he get up to after the credits rolled?

fun stories about your loftwing? were there any traits you and him shared notably? or any that were more opposite?

what are some of your favorite things about your favorite iterations of zelda? what i mean by that is like... what do you like best about tetra/wind waker zelda? what about skyward zelda? botw zelda? they're similar but all unique people, so what endears you the most about each of them?

i know this is a lot, so don't feel like you have to answer in any specific time frame. take as long as is comfortable, and i hope this helps!! ~🍄

these are so many!!! thank you for being so generous!!!

are there any stories/facts about your job/coworkers you can comfortably share? maybe something cool they did/you did with them recently? anyone that stands out in particular among them, without getting too specific for. clear reasons?

most of the ppl i work w are. kinda rude to me all the time so i mostly just drown them out so i don’t go insane. but there is this one kid who is just, like, a ray of sunshine every time he walks into a room. and he works so hard and he cares about his work and i feel like he’s the only bitch who gets me. we vibe over zelda and will just get into debates about the lore on the clock and i look forward to seeing him a lot. 

what's cheeseburger up to atm? any notable stories or anything about him recently, or has he been just living his best life as usual?

he’s just doin he. he sleeps a lot. sometimes in boxes. sometimes under beds. sometimes directly on top of me.

a few weeks back i went to the ER for what i figured out was a kidney stone and while i was literally on my bed writhing in pain trying to hold out until my grandparents got there cheeseburger just like, jumped up on top of me and immediately starting pissing on me, as if to say haha, check this out. i can urinate better than you.

which of the skyloft NPCs do you particularly like? for arguments sake, this is excluding the more story relevant ones, so no groose + his gang, no zelda obviously, etc.

i love all of them so much oh no... everyone i love i love for kinnie reasons like i am tempted to say jakamar cause even though he’s kind of a sleazy dude he, as previously mentioned, smuggled me woodscraps to whittle fsdgjkfsgh

but parrow gives good hugs. and henya always has snacks hidden somewhere. and pumm will give you soup on the house sometimes if he can tell you’re in a rough mood. and and and........ i wuv skyloft. this is all kinnie bullshit actually.

as an opposite to that, talk about groose! i've always loved him as a character, and the bits you've said about him and his relationship with link and zelda is always great! also, any notable kin memories you have of groose? especially things that occured after he left skyloft, or even after the demise fight. what did he get up to after the credits rolled?

talked about him a lil bit in my last ask hehe

fun stories about your loftwing? were there any traits you and him shared notably? or any that were more opposite?

aepon & i were the kind of pair where we seemed really dissimilar on the surface but i think if anyone actually knew us they’d be able to discern pretty quickly that we were 100% twinning. like at face value i was a pretty calm and quiet person who was just, like. spacey and sleepy and vibing while things happened around me, and aepon was this absolute speed demon who had the biggest, loudest presence any time he entered a space. ppl in skyloft called him my red terror.

but the thing about my bird is that he was stubborn to a fault, and recklessly brave, and he just didn’t. stop. and he loved fiercely, the second i was awake in the morning i’d hear him circling overhead and shrieking his happy little shriek, he’d fill my head with all his thoughts of hanging out with me while i was trying to concentrate on work. all those things, we had in common, but i wouldn’t have been able to tell you that. someone like zelda probably would have. 

i think the best representation of it is at the beginning of everything when the tornado took zelda, the both of us just. dove right in. nothing else mattered, no conflict existed within either of us, i didn’t have to steer him in or send my intentions into our shared headspace, he just turned into an arrow flying straight into danger, and i went with him and we were one living being. like that’s our core. we are very opposite, until shit gets real, and then we are this beautiful unity tearing through the clouds. 

what are some of your favorite things about your favorite iterations of zelda? what i mean by that is like... what do you like best about tetra/wind waker zelda? what about skyward zelda? botw zelda? they're similar but all unique people, so what endears you the most about each of them?

HOW DO I COUNT THE WAYS I LOVE ZELDA AHHHHH

oot!zelda’s determination to defy fate... the way she refuses, from the start, to give in to darkness even though she’s only a little girl. the way she sees my commoner ass just waltz up into her private garden after breaking into her house still dressed in my stupid forest clothes and shes like. oh fuck yeah, wanna help me overthrow the gerudo king? and we’re, can’t stress this enough, ten. she’s so confident like she never worries about being powerless or out of her element, she never for a second believes this isn’t something she can fight. and when everything goes to shit she just keeps fighting!!! and still has the time to remind me that i can keep fighting too!!! literally where did she get that personality i love her so much!!!!

tetra’s fucking... simmering fire. her perfect balance between action and thought. like you can tell she’s pissed off and wants to start throwing punches but she always has the self-control to assess if it’s the thing to do in the moment. I CAN’T DO THAT!!! i’m pissed off i want to swords!!!! that motherfucker over there is PROVOKING ME!!!!! and tetra has the same fire inside her but she’s always just, like, “shut the fuck up, link. put your sword away. we need to get the jump on him.” and im like, AHHHHHHH because she’s always right. literally always. i don’t know how she does this but i think about it constantly. i love her level head and her scheming heart and her choice to carve her own destiny. i like how she finds out she’s a legendary princess from an age long past with sacred blood and shes just like ‘that’s cool but actually i’m tetra and i like to cuss and steal.’ and just does that forever. it resonates with me especially because even though the gods acknowledged me as the hero of winds i, like, wasn’t a ‘true’ incarnation of the hero. it’s just what i decided to be with what i was given. she and i are two sides of that coin and there is something beautiful abt that i don’t have words for. in a lot of ways she was my inspiration.

skyward!zelda’s um. everything? everything. i am so in love with her. i am so in love... with her. i am finding it harder to describe her than everyone else here which is so silly because she’s easily the person i was closest with. she’s just, like, made of fire and love? of passion. everything she is stems from what she loves--she loves old legends, and cliche romance stories, and stargazing, and going on adventures. zelda romanticizes everything in her life, she’ll stop mid-sentence to make you look at the sky because it struck her as particularly beautiful today, meanwhile i’m just like. thats the sky i see it every day i live here. and she’s so brave, so fierce, so resilient--there’s literally nothing that could scare her, i’m certain she got to the surface and immediately started spitting curses at blins, if ghirahim had actually found her alone she would have tried to come at him clawing and spitting. i was always so chill because all my anger was Stored in The Zelda, she’d just fight half my battles for me before i could register they were battles. idk. zelda was such an optimist who took everything in stride and believed, no matter what, that she could make it her own and make it beautiful and find something to adore within it. i might have had a quieter disposition, but she was always better at dealing with change than me. it was calming. i love her so much.

botw!zelda’s passion and inquisitive heart, oh my god, oh my god. i’m going to fucking fight everyone in the kingdom who ever made her feel like she talks too much. god it enthralls me, the way she just talks and talks and talks and LETS ME LISTEN, she lets me just SIT THERE and BASK IN IT like some kind of COLD REPTILE ON A ROCK. i literally cannot comprehend how she can fit so much knowledge about so many different things in her brain, and the way she’s ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THAT, literally just getting together with her techie friends and building whole ass machines when she was like 6 years old. shes looking at me like ‘oh this child prodigy curse my shortcomings why cant i be pulling enchanted swords when IM 12′ and im like PRINCESS YOU’RE FUCKING COOLER THAN ME LIKE CONGRATS I TOUCH A SWORD SOMETIMES AND YOU COULD LITERALLY MAKE A ROBOT TO DO THAT FOR YOU oh my god the way she doesn’t see how incredible she is makes me go insane i feel insane just thinking about it she’s the coolest fucking person i’ve ever met she’s the coolest person in hyrule the kingdom is too good for her i want her to take apart hyrule castle brick by brick and just leave a note behind that says ‘im too cool for you’ and then she gets on my ancient magic motorcycle and rides off into the sunset to some paradise far away and if i’m LUCKY she takes me with her. i love zelda

#kin ramblings #Anonymous #wendy answers

[cynical-amphisbaenia]

Hello, can I get help with choosing a classpect?

Personality wise I'm,,, I'm balancing somewhere between a realist and pessimist? I try to take things as they are, but that negativity often creeps up on me(oof). I kinda have a hard time starting friendships bc I tend to doubt people v hard (and lowkey afraid of new things), but if we end up getting close Ill love making silly little things for them and tease them too if I can :p

I also don't vibe with any sort of religions at all bc believing in shit is too much work and also I'm too painfully realist for believing in any sort of Great Entity.

I don't aim for any great goals and in school I had a "eh, minimum requirement is good enough" kind of attitude.

I often need a break from communication, as relationships can be very hard for me to manage.

As for my likes/hobbies: I will love drawing until I die and it's very important for me. I'm attracted to things that are a mix of weird and maybe cute! But I also like a pinch of horror.

- I feel like one of my biggest life themes is emptyness(???): almost no friends, no one to actually call my family, no experience with life, no ambition or clear identity.

Bc of that, I've been coping emotionally through drawing my whole life.

- Any sort of decision is a major struggle, bc I never seem to know myself enough to know what I want or who I am, and its very hard to step up for myself.

- Bc of a deficit of love in my life and abusive family I've been pursuing getting attention and approval from other people. But in the end, I'm just afraid of showing any of my bizarre-ish interests and afraid of judgement if I take any wrong steps in the eyes of ppl I want to impress.

- I'm extremely afraid of being judged for not being smart or wise bc of how my brain is or how little life experience I have.

- I've developed depression and anxiety, and some years ago I've hit my lowest point where I was running from confronting anything at all until it all came crushing down. After that, I also had to face the hopelessness of my family and If it wasn't for one of my closest friends, I would've stayed in the same shitty spot I was born in and would've stayed absolutely miserable.

-If I had to define my end goal in life, it would be to...just being able to Vibe by myself successfuly. To hate myself less, to be less ashamed of things that make me happy. To maybe be more fine with the fact that I don't have to fit myself into any box right away or at all. Be able to make tiny steps into the right direction no matter how afraid I am or the shitty situation I came from. Be just a bit more happy.

There's are few different aspects I would consider. These are Rage, Hope, Heart or Void. I am inclined to say Heart or Void the most, but I’ll go through them all in case one of the others stand out to you more.

For Rage and Void, I would consider the classes Heir or Rogue as these aspects seem to easily surround you. They come quite naturally, which is like an Heir, but also seem to mostly be negative parts of them which occurs often for Rogues. Your end goal aligns nicely with being a Rogue, however it’s difficult to tell how you interact with your aspect. If Rage or Void does seem like the right fit to you, you will need to consider if you change or steal it - for example, if you wanted to get rid of any negative emotions you’re feeling, would you find a way to change/shift them into neutral or positive ones or would you steal/place them away to deal with later (or never)? Also, I lean toward it being Void as it appears more often in your life and any instances of Rage could be due to how they overlap, but if Rage stands out to you more than Void then you may want to consider it.

On the other hand, being a destructive class could also explain your similarities to these aspects. Being a Prince or Bard of Hope would align well with your Rage-like experiences but lack of a connection to religion. You do also wish to destroy less Hope in yourself and be happier. This is a weaker connection though, so unless you’re considering Rage more than Void, feel free to ignore that suggestion. The main one you want to consider is Bard or Prince of Heart - destroying Heart may be why you struggle to understand yourself and it relates to your worry about being judged and feeling ashamed about your interests. Destruction of Heart comes up multiple times throughout your ask.

So, determining between Rogue/Heir of Void and Bard/Prince of Heart is going to be difficult. You don’t entirely know who you are. A way to try to figure this out could be to decide on why this is - does it feel natural for you to be confused about yourself, that maybe this uncertainty is just a part of who you are (Void)? Or does it feel wrong to not know yourself, that parts of yourself have been destroyed and that you need to find them again (Heart)? 

I hope this helps but feel free to ask me any more questions!! ^^

#ask #anon #classpect #classpecting #long post #also if i had to just pick one i'd go rogue of void #but i don't want to rule things out when there's a possibility i'm missing info