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17wishbones · 3 years

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Aaaaand I’m back with another chapter! Chapter VI is finally here! I’m happy that I made it this far with the story. So, just to let it be known, the last chapter will be short and sweet, to end this lovely ride of a short fic. I’ve other ones to finish and write afterwards. I’m planning a special one for the month so long as I have the time to do it. It’s gonna be a smut scene that I’ve been thinking about writing ALL week. Anyways, please enjoy!

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Chapter VI: Pick a Side

Rengoku’s visit has been nothing but a game changer for you. It solidified your standing with him, and now with the red, titanium ring on your finger, it was getting as real as it was getting.

You listened to no one but him and your heart.

Every moment spent with him that week after Christmas came was nothing but magical. You both went out to Korean BBQ, karaoke, bowling, ice skating (he looked good sliding across the ice while you skirted here and there), watched movies at his place, and cuddled a lot.

The only thing he’d let you buy with your money were groceries, since you didn’t want to tell him what you were going to make while he was visiting. Anything else you both did, Rengoku footed the bill without hesitation. He was a man’s man. A man that took care of his woman no matter the circumstance.

So, call you surprised when your dad reached out to you Friday evening, asking, “Hey, baby, how’re you doing over there?”

“I’m doing good. My fiancé and I are getting ready for a night inside. What’s up?” You put him on speaker.

“I talked it over with your mother and we’d like to have him come over so we can get to know him a little more face to face. How does that sound?”

“Let me ask him, hold on. Kyo-kun,” you sweetly cooed for his attention though he was already attached to you from behind with his face buried in your hair, “Dou omoimasu ka?” (What do you think?)

“Kono shuumatsu wa itsu kara itsu made?” (This weekend from when to when?)

“How long can he stay?”

“Your mother’s playing nice this time so he’s allowed to spend the night. Just one though! And in separate rooms.” You groaned. “Her rule, not mine, _____.” He laughed. “So, what does he think? Will he come?”

“Doyoubi kara nichiyoubi made desu yo!” (From Saturday to Sunday!)

“Eh!? Hitoban taizai suru koto ga dekimasu ka!? Hontou ni desu ka!?” (Eh!? I can stay the whole night!? Really!?)

“Hontou ni dekimasu yo!” (You really can!)

“Kare to hanashi wo sasete kudasai!” (Please let me speak to him!) You held the phone up to his face, letting him answer for himself. “Mr. _____, I’d be honored to be a guest in you and your wife’s home! I will abide by any rules made, be respectful, and be on my best behavior.”

“Ha ha, that’s reassuring to hear, Kyōjurō. Well, let me not hold you two up. We’ll be waiting for you two tomorrow. Let us know when you’re coming.”

“Alright, bye Dad! Love you!”

“Love you, too. We’ll talk later.” Your father hung up the phone with a smile on his face. Even though he didn’t have a clue on what you two talked about, it made him happy to hear you, his daughter, sound so happy and enthusiastic when he was around you. Rengoku was a dream come true, a man that treated you right. Honestly, he couldn’t wait until you have a grandchild that he could show off to the world like he did with you. “My baby’s really growing up.”

( space )

“Are you ready, my love?”

‘Why isn’t he having a hard time? I’m getting anxious and goosebumps all over!’ You’ve been feeling nervous about this meet and greet since yesterday. Since fucking Friday evening when your dad called.

Rengoku was all gung-ho about this meet-up! Like, absolutely ecstatic as he was this much closer to being your husband.

“You must be nervous!” He got out of the Tesla and came to your side, his hand taking yours. “I’ll be right there beside you. Take a couple deep breaths.”

‘Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out.’

You took in one final breath as you got out the Tesla and followed him to the door. “Well, look who finally made it!” Your father opened the door, having expected yours and Rengoku’s arrival. “Welcome home, baby.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

“You, too, Kyojuro.”

“Thank you, Mr. _____!”

“Please, just call me your second dad.”

“Really?”

Your dad nodded. “We’re damn near family already.” He chuckled. “You’re like the son I never had. That’s a good feeling.”

Rengoku’s face suddenly brightened, his smile somehow illuminating the room when your father accepted him with open arms. He was so elated that he embraced your dad in a tight squeeze. “That means so much to me!”

“Glad for it, but your grip, son, it’s,” he coughed, “Tight.”

“Oh, my apologies!”

“Don’t worry about it. Now, come on inside. The food is ready. I heard you got quite the appetite on you, Kyōjurō.”

Your mother was there, watching from the sidelines. She hadn’t spoken a word. She merely watched him from a distance, sizing him up with every utterance and step he made. She never felt anyone you found to be worthy of her approval, worthy of you, but that night, you completely rejected her idea and ran off with a man she had just physically seen in person.

This wasn’t just some man you clung to, no. You had spoken vows with this man, ones that you stood on that you dared a bold confrontation with your own mother. She wanted to be sure that this was more than puppy love, that she wouldn’t be sending you off with the wrong man.

Her skepticism had nowhere to be placed as Rengoku proved himself honest and trusting despite your outward actions. Like the both of you were attached to the hip, inseparable the moment you two crossed each other’s path.

You felt awkward in this situation, but Rengoku quietly took note of the way your mother gazed at you two, especially him. He had never been in this position before, but he was for certain not going to fuck it up. Rengoku refused to give up the life he wanted to create with you, the life that the two of you didn’t have together.

Pieces of those dreams reared their ugly heads when you returned home, and it worried him every single day that he’d wake up and you wouldn’t answer his calls anymore. That you’d disappear out of his life forever. That you’d be gone.

“Doushita no?” (What’s wrong?) Your hand wiggled in his hands, held tight.

“Gomen nasai!” (I’m sorry!) He loosened his grip as he brought your hand up to his lips, kissing on top of your knuckles softly. “Zutto anata no koto wo kangaeteru yo!” (I’ve been thinking about you!)

“Aww! How sweet. Think about me when you go back to Japan.”

“I will! Every day!” He met your gaze. “Will you think about me every day, too?”

You cupped his cheeks, laughing, “How silly of you to ask that.”

It was hard to tell what you two went on about, like you both were in your own little world. Nothing else mattered outside of the two of you, and your dad saw it. Your mother was the one still adjusting to your relationship with this man. She didn’t want to believe it was there, but his eyes never lied.

“You recognize that look, don’t you, honey?” Your father asked as he went to stand by her side, observing the intimate interaction. “We used to be like that when we first met.”

“Yes, but they're too young to get married.” Your mother commented as you both walked into the kitchen to get some food and as you both chatted away rather loudly. “And she’ll be so far away from us.”

“Seems like she’ll be in good hands.”

“How would we really know?”

“You see it,” he rested a hand on her back, comforting her, “Whether you want to or not. That one right there. That’s not just any man.”

To your mother’s chagrin, she hadn’t yet found a good way to break you two apart. She didn’t want you to go off so far away and never come back, but expressing such concern for her child, for you, would be too much. Maybe even a sense of weakness, something that she doesn’t like to feel.

Your father wasn’t making anything better as he actually agreed with this arrangement. She only had one chance now. One that could make or break this evening. It was a far reach, but it was one she was really to go behind everyone’s back for.

With Ray, she knew him. She knew his family. He was good company during the holidays and on trips. The family loved him overall and it was something that your mother favored most about him. He was safe, he was familiar.

That’s why the ring at the doorbell had you turning, surprised and in fear. A melody Ray always played when he had arrived. Your reaction garnered Rengoku’s attention. He set his plate down and pulled you in close, rubbing his hands up and down your back. “Daijoubu, boku ga tsuiteru yo.” (It’s okay, I’m here with you.) He murmured into your hair as he comforted you.

“I wonder who that could be…” Your father sighed frustratedly.

You watched with horror as your father opened the door, revealing the last person you didn’t think about seeing after you left the other night. If you could bury any deeper into Rengoku’s chest, you’d leave not a trace in sight for Ray to catch.

“Good evening, Mrs. _____, Mr. _____.” Ray glanced your way. “And you, too, _____.” His eyes rose to Rengoku last. “And I guess you, too.”

“What are you doing here, Ray? It’s supposed to be just the four of us.”

“Your mother invited me over.” You frowned visibly. “Who am I to say no to her invitation? It’s obvious, isn’t it? You’re meant to be with me. So, tell him to step off and go back home.”

You drew in your bottom lip, holding back what you wanted to say. You couldn’t believe that your mom was really trying to get you back with Ray. Well, you weren’t going back. Not even in the next ten lifetimes.

“You have no respect.” You covered your mouth just as soon as an audible gasp had left between your lips. “Not for me, yourself, and especially for her.” Rengoku’s muscles tensed up. “She wants to feel safe and comfortable. You are a disgrace of a man for making her feel otherwise.”

“Those are some feisty fighting words. You sure you can back them up?”

“If that is the language that will make you understand, then I accept your challenge.”

“You don’t have to, Kyōjurō.”

“Yeah, Kyoooojurō. You don’t.”

Rengoku’s face drew on a dark expression. “In her honor, I shall.”

“Then come outside then. We’ll handle this once and for all.”

Rengoku squeezed you tight before following Ray outside, where some bystanders might see. He stood a few feet away from him, staring him square in the eyes as he began unbuttoning his shirt. The way that your father and your mother’s jaw dropped upon seeing his fine physique was picture worthy. Ray was in shape, but he was nothing compared to the regime Rengoku’s body had gone through.

“Tryna show off?”

Rengoku bared nary a smile as he folded his shirt and set it on the cold ground.

“Be careful with him!”

“He’ll be alright. So serious--” Ray’s chattiness almost got him swept by a clean grab going directly for his neck. He saw every muscle in that arm twitch with a vengeance. It was then that he believed he made a mistake.

Ray was a damn good fighter, but he suddenly felt he didn’t compare from how Rengoku read his every move, anticipating where to strike before Ray could even get good footing in the ground. Ray retaliated with a one-two and a hook, but it looked as if his opponent was moving faster than the eye can see, weaving and tapping Ray whenever he reached forward.

Unfortunately for Ray, as much as the fight had his adrenaline rushing, he took too wide of a swing and was caught, flipped over, and put on his back with a large, calloused hand pressed down on his chest. One close up gaze into those vermillion eyes made Ray feel like he was encroaching on a lion’s den with fangs bared to snap his neck.

Ray wasn’t ready to give up yet as he wrapped his legs around Rengoku’s arm, rolling off and onto the ground, pinning him down. It wasn’t long until both of them scuffled from another and back on their feet. Rengoku left Ray no time to breathe as he attempted catching Ray off guard by grabbing at his neck. He barely blocked that, going in for a kick at his chest.

Your man was focused like back at his in-home dojo. He quickly regained his stance and was out for blood (metaphorically) as he caught Ray slipping. His calloused fingers grasped tight at the front of Ray’s shirt with force as he cocked back his left hand for a hit that never came.

Ray had always fought and won the majority of his battles. However, tonight wasn’t his night as he faced a beast in the arts of fisticuffs, with attacks so strong that the wind sang in his ear. The war was over as quickly as it had begun.

“Alright, alright…” He heaved hard. “You can have her.” He tried pushing Rengoku off of him but he wouldn’t loosen his grip..

“Apologize to her.” If Rengoku’s gaze could kill. “Now.” He leaned in close. “Or you’ll regret coming here to make her sad.”

Ray’s heart missed a beat. Rengoku was serious, frightening. Not the man he had speculated on before. He had a killer look in his eye, one that he hadn’t seen in a long, long time. He could only turn his head to the side as Rengoku released his grip on the front of his shirt. He was fully overpowered and embarrassed in front of your parents, but also in front of you.

“My bad, _____. I… I won’t be around any more. Looks like you got him to look out for ya. Enjoy ya life in rice town.”

Rude, but you had gotten an apology nonetheless. Ray made a quick exit, jumping into his stick-shift Impreza and speeding off into the distance, disappearing out of the neighborhood as quickly as he had come.

“_____-”

“Daijoubu!? Itai desu ka?” (Are you okay!? Are you hurt?)

“Daijoubu desu yo!” (I’m fine!)

“Hontou ni?” (Really?)

“Nn!” Rengoku wrapped his arms around you the moment you were close, embracing you. “Are you okay, Sunflower?” You don’t know why, but when he asked you if you were alright, tears started rolling down your face as you struggled to speak. He said nothing more as he wiped your tears away with his thumbs while also caressing your cheeks in turn.

Your mother was ready to step in, but your father caught her gently by the shoulder. “But--”

“She’s in good hands now.” He looked on at the two of you with a smile widening on his face. “You either accept it, or we lose her forever.”

Your mother couldn’t fathom the thought. You were their only child, and the more she tried to involve herself in your life, the farther you’d distance yourself. She wouldn’t… be able to handle that.

( space )

“Thank you so much for allowing me to stay the night!” Your gracious and grateful fiancé deeply bowed to your parents. “I shall remain in my room for the remainder of the night!”

“I’m sure you will!” Your father laughed heartily. “What you did today was impressive. I’ve no doubt that you’ll treat and protect our daughter well.”

“You have my word, my second dad!” He was working on the honorifics, but it was the thought that counted. “Goodnight to you as well, my second mom!” When he turned to you, he couldn’t help but smile. “Oyasumi nasai, boku no himawari.” (Goodnight, my Sunflower.)

“Oyasumi nasai, watashi no konyakusha.” (Goodnight, my fiance.) You kissed him three times, for luck. Two on the cheek, and one on the lips. “I’ll be in my room like the good girl I am. Goodnight, mom, dad.” Rengoku couldn’t help but gaze at your walk to your room and catch one more look before you closed your door for the night. He went into his room next, and then your parents. As he snuggled up in the guest bedroom, he believed the night a success.

Slumber was just moments away after having such an eventful day. He’d wake up early and call his family, tell them everything that went down and how both of your families would finally unite as one.

His drift into REM sleep was quiet, peaceful, warm, wet, electrifying, and-- ‘What’s this feeling!?’ His eyes opened wide as he peeled back the sheets, catching the sight of you giving him a blowjob. He almost lost it when you continued on as if your parents weren’t just down the hallway!

“_____!” He exclaimed in a whisper. “I thought we would be separated for the night! You said you’d be a good girl tonight!”

Rengoku was doing his damndest to be serious, but it proved difficult when you crawled onto his lap. Even more so when he deviated his eyes down your soft, pajama dress that outlined damn near every line and curve of your body. Was it deplorable that he wanted to pull the front of your dress down and suck on your nipples as you both grinded on each other? Such a tempting thought, but he must adhere to their rules.

“I am a good girl.” Even worse, yet better. You peeled off the pajama dress and tossed it to the side. “Your good girl.” His whole face went red after seeing you bared no panties and no bra. It was like seeing you for the first time though you’ve spent copious amounts of time together. He never got enough of you. “Oh!” You suddenly mused. “Someone’s happy to see me.” You leaned down and enveloped Rengoku in a series of tantalizing kisses.

He was supposed to hold on strong, but he lost to your seducing little ways. Both calloused hands smoothed down your back, cupping the meat of your ass as you aroused him to no end. You were damn near insatiable and he loved that about you. How you came to him for your needs. He felt that he was the only man in your world that could please you how you wanted, that could make you feel how you do, that could make you come like he did.

It was selfish to think it but who else would compare to him in your eyes?

When he saw into your dark, lustful eyes, he knew the answer. It made him prideful. It made him protective. It made him pursue your happiness to the fullest.

However, he suddenly remembered, “Condomu ga arimasen. Gomen nasai.” (I’m sorry, I don’t have a condom.)

“Zenzen ii yo,” (No problem,) you filtered through the sheets, pulling one out. “Arimasu yo.” (I have one.)

Rengoku knew he was in trouble then. He hadn’t expected his future wife to be so bold as to pull out a condom like that. It surprised him, and it also turned him on! “My Sunflower is so prepared!” He exclaimed in a somewhat hushed whisper.

“Not so loud, or our little rendezvous will be cut short.”

You looked glorious even with any weight you’ve gained, lost, or maintained. He loved sinking his fingers into you. However, you didn’t leave him much time to admire you as you scooted back, ripping the wrapper open with your teeth, and slipping the cap over his hardened erection.

Seeing him fight made you so hot and heavy from before that you needed a piece of him before the sun rose. With it fit on snugly and oh so nicely, you moved back forward and hovered over it. “Be gentle with me.” You heed as you lowered down on him, your pussy clamping on him every inch of the way down.

Rengoku bit down on his bottom lip, muffling his deep breath as you took him in. You were such a sight to hold in this position that he could’ve come right then. However, that’d be no way to satisfy his future wife if he came so suddenly. And even if he did, he’d continue as if he didn’t at all.

When you sat on top comfortably, you leaned over him as you both slowly rocked your hips, meeting skin to skin. It wasn’t long until the pace hastened, and it was when the urge hit him. He caught your right nipple in his mouth, sucking and licking as you rocked as quietly as you could, damn near throwing inhibition and decency into the wind.

He somewhat came back to when your moans started to fill the air, becoming louder and louder. But you were just a step ahead as you sat upright with your nipple leaving his mouth with a pop. This cowgirl position was dangerous as the tip of his dick often kissed your cervix, but you weren’t tryna play meek and nice. You wanted Rengoku deep inside of you.

Though he worried about your parents waking up from the squeaking bed, he couldn’t help but oblige, especially when you looked so good on top of him. If it wasn’t for the condom, he would’ve cum in you two times by now.

The rendezvous was quick, but oh so hot.

Your clenching walls coaxed the last bit of his seed out, a splatter of a mess on his pubes as you slowly lifted up, looking down at the mess you two made. Fortunately for your man, you didn’t give him a chance to protest your next move as you slowly pulled the condom off and returned to your position from before, cleaning off his sensitive dick with soft strokes of your tongue and visibly swallowing all that he had to offer.

Rengoku hadn’t expected that at all, and you knew that as you stared at him while cleaning your lips. “Mmm, my favorite.” You got off of him, even though you didn’t want to and pulled his drawls and pajama shorts back up. You wrapped the condom up in some tissue and tossed it in a nearby trash bin. “See you in the morning, Kyōjurō.” Kiss blown, you threw on your pajama dress and headed back to your room as if you weren’t on that demon time with your man.

Poor thing was left stunned, satisfied, and bewildered. That feeling of excitement, wonder, and love kept him going on long and strong. ‘There’s nothing I won’t do for you,’ he thought with a smile on his face, ‘No other woman can make me feel the way you do. That can make me smile the way you do. That can make me laugh the way you do! I can’t wait for us to be together!’

He truly felt for Ray now because he had given up on someone as great as you, as wonderful as you, as loving as you. You were worth fighting for and then some because he knew that when the fight was over, you’d be there by his side.

That was why it was going to hurt him when he had to leave. Going back to Japan without you was going to be hard on him just like it was going to be for you when he left. Only one more year was left, but he wanted her to forgo all of that and come with him now. How selfish of him to think that but when it came to you, could you blame him?

Rengoku hadn’t been through something like this before and it was exciting, thrilling, and hopeful. No matter what you looked like on the outside, he loved it. Your skin, hair, and nails? He lived for all of that. He didn’t want you to change anything for him or for anyone else unless you wanted to.

You filled him with something he had long been waiting for. You’ve filled him with love, so much that his heart could burst from the overflow. What he had chosen to do was the right decision. All of the pieces were finally falling together. His commitment to you will never falter.

As waking up in the morning and finding you snuggled up on him helped solidify what everyday life with you would be like, it was the joy and adoration on your face when you looked up at him that made him all the more amorous. “Mornin’, handsome.”

Perfect. Absolutely perfect. Perfect for him and only him. And he was perfect for you, magnificently perfect. Perfect for you and only you.

( space )

Rengoku didn’t let it show, because it wasn’t masculine to express such soft emotions, but he longed to have you in his arms every day. That’s why it hurt to wake up in his apartment in Japan without you there beside him. Though he wasn’t given much time to linger on his thoughts, he didn’t let that get him down. Every day, he printed out any pictures you had taken over the time you both had been together. It kept his mind off of you not being here. Actually, it acted as a countdown to when you were coming.

There was going to be a bit of a gap until you received your diploma and certification to work abroad. The moment you showcased your graduation gown, Rengoku immediately implored you to send in an application to where he worked - Kimetsu Academy as they had just added on English classes and would be looking for native assistant language teachers.

On his word did he swear to put in a good word for you and get you a job, and that he did! Once the eight weeks had passed, you spent the next couple of months getting the necessary documents signed, notarized, and sent. Background check done, and everything approved, you applied and received your work visa and was planning on your next trip into your new life with him.

You wouldn’t believe the plans that Rengoku had set up, thanks to his mother’s guidance. His father kept him busy with financial stability, and having everything in order even though he wanted to work primarily as a history teacher. He wanted to give back to the school that gave him the experience of a lifetime, his friends, and, of course, his soon to be wife.

“Sorosoro iku jikan da yo.” (It’s time to go.) His driver called from the doorway of the empty home Rengoku just purchased. It was just outside of the city. Space for him, for you, for Senjuro, for his parents, and, of course, for your future children.

With a knowing nod, he was out and in the car, on that two hour drive back to the airport. His stomach turned and twisted in excitement and nervousness. Yeah, he just spoke with you the day before, but he wanted nothing more than to see you coming down the escalator and out into the departure terminal, where he’d be waiting.

Time ticked slowly, from the time he left until the time he got there. He kept himself from pacing by clenching his fingers together over the bouquet of sunflowers in his arms. “Kyōjurō! Tadaima!” (Kyōjurō! I’m home!) His eyes met yours. The moment he saw you coming down in your sweats, two suitcases, and a carry-on bag, Rengoku lost his breath as he met you when you came down, embracing you close and tight. He kissed your forehead sweetly as he whispered in your hair, “Okaerinasai, _____!” (Welcome home, _____!) - - - - - - - - Chapters: 1 (Part 1) / (Part 2) / (Part 3) / 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7

#rengoku kyojuro x reader #rengoku kyoujurou #rengoku x reader #kimetsu rengoku #rengoku kyōjurō #rengoku x you #demon slayer fanfic #demon slayer #kny smut #kimestu no yaiba

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c-is-for-circinate · 3 years

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I'd love to hear more of your thoughts about why P5R didn't quite land for you. I had the same reaction to it, but I've never quite been able to properly articulate why the last section fell so flat.

God okay so I've tried several times to answer this, and it seems like the answer is 'I still have way too many feelings, personally, to say this in anything less than thirty pages and fifteen hours of work', because Persona 5 the original is a game I loved a lot and care about a great deal. And most of the reasons I disliked Royal feel, in my head, like a list of ways it broke some of the things I liked best about P5--which means explaining them feels like I need to explain everything I loved about the original game, which is a book in itself, complete with referents to P3, P4, Jungian psychology, the Joseph Campbell mytharc, and fuck all even knows what. And that is too much.

But today I realized that I could instead describe it from an angle of, Persona 5 Strikers succeeds really well at doing the thing I think Royal was trying to do but failed at. And that I think I can talk about in a reasonable amount of wordspace, hopefully, behind this cut because I have at least one friend who hasn't played Royal yet.

Note for reblogs/comments: I HAVE NOT FINISHED STRIKERS YET. I got through the jail that pretended to be the final jail and have not yet gone into the obviously inevitable 'ohshit wait, you mean there's something more than simple human machinations behind all of this?' dungeon. (I got stuck on a really frustrating side quest, put the game down, and then dived into Hades to avoid throwing the Switch across the room for a while--and anyone around this blog lately knows how THAT'S been going.) Please no spoilers past Okinawa!

So, one of the many, many things I really appreciated about Persona 5 was its straightforward and unashamed attitude towards abusers and their acts of violence. Because, while yes P5 is a story about the use of power and control to make others suffer, it fundamentally isn't about those abusers themselves. It's about their victims, those that survive their crimes. And this shows up repeatedly over the course of the game.

We do not give a shit why Kamoshida wanted to beat and rape his students. We really don't. Kamoshida does not deserve our attention one moment longer than it takes to make him stop. Because, ultimately, that's the goal of P5, start to end. We don't know for sure if what we're doing is fair, if it's justice, if it's questionable. What we know is that people are being hurt, badly, actively, right now this second. What we know is that victims are suffering. What we know is that we, personally, us-the-protag and us the Phantom Thieves at large, are in danger. And in those circumstances, we don't care about the abuser's side any more. We don't. We don't have the space or time or capacity to care, because that is not the point.

The point is to help the weak. To save the people who need saving, right here and now. To give others the courage to stand up on their own behalf. We're not even out to change society, not really--that's a byproduct. We are reactions. We are triage. We are important.

There's something so empowering and validating about that as a theme, y'know? In a media landscape so full of "sympathetic villains", the idea that, you know, maybe sometimes you don't have to break yourself to show compassion that might possibly heal the bad guy--that sometimes you can just make the bad guy stop hurting people--feels both refreshing and satisfying. I really appreciate it as a message! I liked it a lot!

And yes, there's nuance to that theme, and the game is not without compassion. We save Futaba, because 'make the bad guy stop hurting people', in that case, means 'make this person stop hurting herself'. We give Sae a path forwards, help her fix her own heart. Yet it's worth pointing out that in both of those cases, while we were very glad to do those things, to save those people, we also went into both of those palaces for extremely practical reasons to begin with. We needed Futaba's help. We needed Sae's help. The fact that we chose to talk Sae into a change of heart rather than simply stealing her treasure, while ultimately a very good thing for her, was absolutely a practical choice predicated on the need for her palace to still exist to save our life. And yes, we wanted to save her, for Makoto's sake--yes, we wanted desperately to save Futaba. But Sae and Futaba let themselves be helped, too, and that doesn't change the overarching themes of the story itself.

Akechi (and to some extent Okumura) would not let himself be helped. Akechi's another interesting nuance to this theme, because of all our villains, we do learn the most about what drove him to the cruelties and crimes he's committed. He's at that intersection of victim and villain, and we want to help him, as a victim--but we also know that stopping him as a villain is more important. We'd like to save him from himself if we could, because we save people from their sources of trauma, it's what we do. We regret being unable to do so. But in the end, what matters to the story is not that Akechi refused to be saved--it's that Shido and Yaldabaoth need to be stopped, for the sakes of everyone else they're hurting now and may continue to hurt in the future.

The thing is, there's space and maybe even a need for a corollary discussion of those places where victim and villain intersect. It's an interesting, pertinent, and related topic. Strikers made an entire video game about it, a really good video game. It's centered in the idea that, yes, these people need to be stopped, and we will make stopping them our priority--but they're not going after us, and that gives us some space to sympathize. Even for Konoe, who specifically targets the Phantom Thieves--compare him to Shido, who actively destroyed the lives of both Joker and Futaba, who ordered Haru's father's death, who's the entire reason the team is still dealing with the trauma of Akechi's everything. Of course the game can be sympathetic to Konoe where it can't with Shido. There's enough distance to do that.

But right--Strikers is a separate game. It's a separate conversation. It's, "last time, we talked about that, so now let's take it one step further." And that's good writing. (It's something Persona has done before, too, also really well! Persona 3 is about terrible, occasionally-suicidal depression and grief. P4 is about how you can still be hurting and need some help and therapy even if things seem ok. Related ideas, but separate conversations that need to be separate in order to be respectful and do justice to either one. P5, as a follow-up to P4, is a conversation about how, ok, changing yourself is great and all, but sometimes the problem is other people so how do you deal with that? Again, still related! Still pertinent! Still alluded to in P4, with Adachi's whole thing--but it wasn't the time or place to base a quarter of the game around it.)

So one of Royal's biggest issues, to me, is that it tries to tack on this whole new angle for discussion onto a game that was originally about something else.

Adding Maruki's palace--adding it at the end, which by narrative laws suggests that it's the true point that everything else should be building up to--suddenly adds in about a hundred new dimensions at once. It wants us to engage with "what in this abuser/manipulator's life led him to act this way?" for basically the first time all game (we'll get to Akechi later). It wants us to engage with, "if the manipulator has a really good reason or good intentions, does that mean we should forgive them?" It requires us to reflect on, "what is the difference between control and cruelty?" It asks, "okay, but if people could be controlled into being happy, would that be okay?" (Which, based on the game so far, is actually a wild out-there hypothetical! Literally not a single thing we've seen in the game suggests that could ever happen. Even the people who think being controlled is safer and easier are miserable under it. Control that's able to lead to actual happiness is completely out of left field in the context of everything we've encountered all game so far.)

That's too much! We don't have time to unpack all that! We only have an eighth of the game left! Not to mention we are also being asked to bring back questions we put to bed much earlier in the game about the morality of our own actions, in a wholely unsatisfying way. Maruki attempts to justify his mass brainwashing because "it's the same as what you're doing", and we know it isn't, but the game didn't need Maruki calling it out in order for us to get that. We already faced that question when we started changing hearts, and again several times throughout the game, and again when we found our targets in Yaldabaoth's cells. The fact that we change hearts does not mean we think "changing hearts is fine and kind and should be done to everyone, actually." Changing hearts has been firmly established in this game as an act of violence, acceptable only because it prevents further systemic violence against innocents that we must prevent. The moral question has never once been about whether it's ok to change the hearts of the innocent, only about how far it's ethical to go against individuals who are actively hurting other people. Saying "you punched that guy to keep him from shooting a child, so punching people is good and I will save the world by punching everyone!" is confusing! and weird! and not actually at all helpful to the question of, how much violence is it acceptable to use to protect others! So presenting the question that way just falls really flat.

(And right, I love Strikers, because Strikers has time to unpack all that. Strikers can give us a main bad guy who wants to control the whole world for everybody's own good, because Strikers has earned that thematic climax. It has given us sympathetic bad guys who started out wanting to control the world to protect themselves and ended up going too far. It's given us Mariko Hyodo, who wanted to control the world to protect other people and went too far. It's given us a long-running thread about police, the desire to serve, and the abuse of power that can lead to. And since we are actively trying to care for the people whose hearts we're changing in Strikers, we can open the door to questions about using changes-of-heart and that level of control to make other people happy. We can even get a satisfying conclusion out of that discussion, because we have space to characterize the difference--Konoe thinks that changing peoples' hearts means confining them, but the Phantom Thieves think it means setting them free. We have seen enough sympathetic villains that we as an audience have had the space to figure out how we feel about that, and to understand the game's perspective of "stop them AND save them, if we can possibly do both." And that message STILL rests firmly on Persona 5's message of "it is Good to do what you have to do to stop an abuser so long as you don't catch innocent people in your crossfire.")

It's worth noting that the general problem of 'asking way too many new questions and then not answering them' also applies to how Royal treats its characters, too. P5 did have unanswered questions left at the end! The biggest one, and we all knew this, was Akechi, and what actually happened to him, and how we should feel about him, and how he felt about us. That was ripe for exploring in our bonus semester, and to Royal's credit they did in fact try to bring it up, but by god did they fuck up doing it.

Akechi's probable death in the boiler room was absolutely the biggest dangling mystery of the game. It was an off-screen apparent death of a key antagonist, so all of the narrative rules we know suggested that he might still be alive and would probably come back if the story went on for long enough. So when Royal brings him back on Christmas Eve, hey, great! Question answered. Except that the situation is immediately too good to be true, and immediately leads to another mystery, which leads to a flat suspicion that something must be wrong. We spend several hours of gameplay getting sly hints that, oooh, maybe he's not really alive after all, before it's finally confirmed by Maruki: yup, he really died, if we end the illusion we'll kill him too. Okay, at least we know now. Akechi is alive right now and he's going to be dead if we do this, and that doesn't make a ton of sense because every other undead person disappeared when the person who wished for them realized they were fake but at this point we'll take it. So we take down Maruki, and okay, Akechi really is dead! Probably! We're fairly sure! Aside from our lingering doubts!

And then we catch a glimpse of maybe-probably-could be him through the train window, and I just want to throw something, because come on.

Look, it is just a fact of storytelling: the more times you make an audience ask 'wait, is this character dead or aren't they?', the less they will care, until three or four reversals later you will be hard pressed to find anybody who gives a shit. Royal does this like four different times, and every iteration comes with even less certainty than the last. By the end, we somehow know even less than we did when we started! Did Akechi survive the boiler room to begin with and Maruki just didn't know? Or was Maruki lying to try and manipulate us further? Or was he actually dead and then his strength of will when Maruki's reality dissolved was enough to let him survive after all? Is that even actually him out the train window?

Where is he going! What is he doing! How did any of this happen! What is going on! We all had these questions about Akechi at the end of the original P5, and the kicker is that Royal pretends like it's going to answer them only to go LOL JK NO. It's frustrating and it's dissatisfying and it annoys me.

The one Akechi question that Royal doesn't even bother to ask, though, let alone leave ambiguous, is how does the protagonist feel about him? The entire emotional weight of the third semester rests on the protagonist caring about Akechi, Sumire, and Maruki. Maruki's the person we're supposed to sympathize with even as we try to stop him. Sumire's the person we're trying to save from herself. And Akechi is our bait--is, we are told, the one thing our protagonist wished for enough to actualize it in this world himself. Akechi's the final lure to accept Maruki's deal. Akechi's survival is meant to be tempting.

For firm Akechi fans, this probably worked out fine--the game wanted to insist that the protagonist cared for Akechi the same way the player did. For those of us who're a little more ambivalent, though (or for the many and valid people who hated him), this is a super sour note. Look, one of the Persona series' strengths is the way it lets players choose to put their time and emotional investment into an array of different characters, so the main story still has weight even if there's a couple you don't care about that much. It has always done this. The one exception, from P3 all the way through P4 to here and now, is Nanako Dojima, and by god she earned that distinction. I have never met a person who played Persona 4 who didn't love Nanako. Nanako is a neglected six-year-old child who is brave and strong enough to take care of herself and all of the housework but who still tries not to cry when her dad abandons her again and lights up like the sun when we spare her even the tiniest bit of time and attention. It is impossible not to care for Nanako. Goro Akechi is not Nanako.

And yet third semester Royal doesn't make sense if your protagonist doesn't feel linked to Akechi. The one question, out of all the brand new questions Royal throws out there, that it decides to answer all by itself--and it's how you as a player and your protagonist ought to feel about an extremely complex and controversial character. What the fuck, Royal. What the fuck.

In conclusion, I'll leave you with this. I played the original Persona 5 in March and April of 2017, as an American, a few months after the 2016 election and into the term of our then president. It felt painfully timely. A quick calendar google early on indicated that the game's 20XX was almost certainly 2016, and the closer our plot got to the in-game November leadup to an election destined to be dominated by a foul and charming man full of corruption and buoyed up by his own cult of personality, the more I wanted to laugh/cry. It felt timely. It felt important. It felt right.

I went through Royal (in LP form on youtube, not having a platform to play it on) in summer of 2020, with a hook full of face masks by my front door and protests about racial tension and local policing that occasionally turned into not-quite-riots close enough to hear at night if I opened the windows of my apartment. The parts of the game that I remembered felt as prescient and meaningful as ever, if not even more so. The new parts felt baffling. Every single evil in the game felt utterly, painfully real, from the opening moments of police brutality to the idea of a country led by a guy who probably would use his secret illegitimate teenage son as a magical assassin if the opportunity presented itself and he thought he could get away with it. Yaldabaoth as the cumulative despair of an entire population who just wanted somebody to take over and make things be okay--yes, yes, god, in summer of 2020? With streets full of people refusing to wear masks and streets full of people desperate for change? Of course. Of course that holy grail of safety should be enticing. Of course it should be terrifying.

And then Maruki. Maruki, who was just so far outside the scope of anything I could relate to the rest of the game or my own life. Because every single other villain in the rest of Persona is real. From the petty pandering principal to the human-trafficking mob boss. The corrupt politicians and the manmade god of cultural desire for stability. And this game was trying to tell me that the very biggest threat of all of them, the thing that was worse than the collective force of all society agreeing to let this happen because succumbing was easier than fighting back--that the very biggest threat of all was that the world could be taken over by some random nobody's misguided attempts to help?

No. Fuck no. I don't buy it. Because god, yes, I have seen the pain and damage done on a tiny and personal and very real level by the tight-fisted control of someone trying to help, it never looked like this. Not some ascended god of a bad therapist. All the threats to the world, and that's the one I'm supposed to take seriously? This one man is more of a threat than the fundamental human willingness to be controlled?

Sorry, but no. Not for me. Not in this game. Not in this real-life cyberpunk dystopian apocalypse.

#c plays persona #driveby meta attack #p5 royal spoilers #p5 strikers spoilers #holy crap I did it #I actually wrote a semicoherent essay of a length I'm willing to put on Tumblr #about my problems with this game #I have been trying on and off for MONTHS #I wanted to like Royal SO BADLY #it makes me SO UPSET #anyway #now back to your regularly scheduled Hades blogging #asked and answered #Anonymous

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blackhakumen · 3 years

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Mini Fanfic #722: RoseGarden Cuddle Session (RWBY)

7:23 p.m. at Team JNPRO's Residence, The Living Room.......

TV Screen: KONO DIO DA!!!!

Oscar: (Watching TV on the Sofa) ('Sigh') (Suddenly Notice a Blanket Fell Down on his Back) Hm?

Ruby: (Suddenly Hugs Oscar From Behind) SURPRISE ATTACK!~

Oscar: (Chuckles Lightly) Hey, Ruby. You seem to be in a pretty good and somewhat hyperactive mood today.

Ruby: (Giggles Softly) Well, duh! (Snuggles onto Her Embrace with Oscar) Can't a girl spend any time with her precious farm boi for the evening?~

Oscar: (Playfully Rolling his Eyes) Wellllllllll, I'm not too sure about-

Ruby: (Playfully Smacks Oscar's Arm) Oscar!

Oscar: (Chuckles Lightly) Okay. Okay. I was joking! (Turns to Ruby with a Sheepish Smile) Really. I'm glad you had a good day today.

Ruby: (Gives Oscar the Most Adorable Pouty Face He Has Ever Seen) ('Hmph') You better. ('Sigh') But anyways......(Smiles Softly) What about you, Oscar? How was your day?

Oscar: Pretty good. I got to spend time with Ms. Glynda today.

Ruby: Oh my gosh. Really? Did you guys have fun together?

Oscar: Yeah. We went out to this fancy restaurant and took a stroll around town afterwards. (Shrugs a Little) And honestly, she's a lot less scary than you guys said she would be.

Ruby: Huh. Really?

Oscar: Yeah. She was pretty nice all things considered. She even asked if got any proper sleep last night.

Ruby: D'awwwwwwww~ (Playfully Pokes on Oscar's Cheeks) Just like any mother would for their precious farm boi~

Oscar: (Turns Around and Gives Ruby a Deadpinned Look on his Face)

Ruby: (Starts Snickering at Oscar's Deadpinned Face) What? It's not my fault you're gosh darn cute.

Oscar: Ruby, you are just as adorable as I am.

Ruby: True. But you're way more cuter in comparison.

Oscar: (Glares at Ruby) That's absurd! I can't be cute! I'm at least eligible to be handsome.

Ruby: (Begins Rolling her Eyes) Even handsome guys can have their cute moments every now and then, Oscar. That's nothing to be ashamed of.

Oscar: ('Sigh') I guess you have a point. Still think you're cuter though.

Ruby: (Raised an Eyebrow) You're not just saying that to deny your own cuteness, are you?

Oscar: No, Ruby. I mean it this time. You are cuter to me. (Slowly Starts to Blush) Then again, if I'm being completely honest here, I think you're a lot more amazing than that. You're strong, caring, fun to be around, and you do whatever you can help those in need, even if it seems impossible at first. All of that and more just....(Smiles Softly) Makes me even more in love with you than I thought it would. And I like it.

Ruby: (Heart Begins to Melt in Pure Happiness as She Continues Snuggle onto Oscar) You know you're just as amazing as am I right? You're brave, level headed, a real sweetheart, and you always try and do your best even when things doesn't work well to your favor. All of that and more are the reasons why I will never stop loving you everyday. And you can bet your cute butt that I'll always be there you no matter what!

Nora: (Slowly Has her Head Out from the Stairs, Giving Ruby The Silent Glare)...............

Ruby: (Eyes Widened in a Bit of Fear at the Sight of Nora's Glare Before Correcting Herself) I-I mean.....('Clears Throat') As well as Nora, Jaune, Ren, Pyrrha, and.... everyone else in our group of friends and family, but....('Sigh') You know what I mean, right? (Gives Nora the Look that Says "You're Happy Now?")

Nora: (Gives Ruby a Bright Smile and a Thumbs Up Before Going Back to the Bedroom)

Oscar: (Heart Begins to Melt in Happiness as Well) Yeah. I do. (Hugs Ruby Lovingly) Thanks, Ruby. It means a lot that you think that way about me......Even though your feats are a lot more impressive than mines in compariso-

Ruby: ('Uggghhhhh') Oh my god, Oscar! Would you PLEASE stop selling yourself short for one second and accept how wonderful you really are already!? Cause you know that I will sucker punch anyone who says otherwise! And I WILL too. Maybe even have Momma Nora actually break some legs for once!!

Oscar: (Chuckles Lightly) Okay. Okay. I promise I won't do that anymore. But only if you promise me not start any violence for my sake.

Ruby: (Smirks Playfully) 'Fraid I can't fulfill that promise. I already love you too much to even try~ (Gives Oscar a Loving Kiss on the Cheek)

Oscar: (Sighs While Rolling his Eyes) Love you too, Ruby Rose..... Seriously. Don't hurt anyone.

Ruby: No promises~

@keyenuta

@albion-93

@ma-lemons

@rozanime

@oscarpineprotectionsquad

@littlemisssquiggles

@miki-13

#rwby #oscar pine #ruby rose #nora valkyrie #glynda (mentioned)#cute romance #lots and lots of fluff here #rosegarden #cuddling & snuggling #humor

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kinogane · 3 years

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So the ending theme of the Nekomonogatari (White) arc of Monogatari Series: Second Season is a song called アイヲウタエ or “Ai wo Utae” (lit. "Song of Love") by Luna Haruna. The full version was released as a single on July 24, 2013, after the third episode of Nekomonogatari (White), which means that the 90-second-long ED version of “Ai wo Utae” was available before the approximately four-minute-long full version. That the ED version was out before the single is not weird in the slightest (in fact, it's probably just sensible marketing), nor is the ED version being a shorter, edited version of the full song, since devoting four minutes of a roughly thirty-minute-long episode to just the ending sequence and credits doesn't really make sense.

Most TV edits of songs usually cut the song down into one verse-chorus sequence alongside anything else from the song that helps with flow and pacing, like intros and outros. For instance, the TV edit used for the previous arc's ending, “kieru daydream” by Marina Kawano, is essentially the full version up to the first chorus with the outro edited in for a sense of closure, probably helped by the last chorus in the full version just being the first chorus with a different inflection.

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But for whatever reason, the Monogatari series likes making especially creative edits when it comes to their ending themes. (The opening themes are largely (entirely?) image songs sung by the relevant VA, so on some level they're likely composed with the TV edit in mind.)

The TV edit of “Kimi no Shiranai Monogatari” by supercell and Nagi Yanagi, used as the ending theme of Bakemonogatari, starts with the intro instrumental of the full version, before jumping to the second verse (”Are ga DENEBU ARUTAIRU BEGA”/...), then loops back to the first pre-chorus (”Makkura na sekai kara miageta”/...) and chorus (”Itsu kara darō, kimi no koto o”/...).

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The TV edit of the next ending theme, “Naisho no Hanashi” by ClariS for Nisemonogatari, starts with the intro of the full version (the count-in) before jumping to the third verse (”Sakki kara ano seifuku no ko ga”/...), then loops back to the first pre-chorus (”Zutto atashi ga kono mama”/...) and continues into the first chorus (”Sono toki ni nattatte osoindakara”/...), and then switches the last two lines of the chorus to the last two lines of the second chorus (”Really, you are easy”/...) then jumps to the outro.

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So the structure of the TV edit of Ai wo Utae, going from the intro (”Shinzou ni awasete”/...) to the first verse (”Heibon na kin'youbi”/...) to the first pre-chorus (”Kimi no me ga oyoidara”/...) and chorus (”Honto wa ne, zutto kimi to”/...) then jumping to the last post-chorus (”Me to me wo awasetara”/...), largely isn't all that special in the context of Monogatari ending theme TV edits.

Except for the part where the instrumental accompanying the last post-chorus in the TV edit is not the instrumental accompanying the last post-chorus in the full song (and in fact, might not even exist in the full song at all?), and instead transitions into the last lines of the first post-chorus as the vocals fade out.

youtube

There is no structural equivalent of this edit in the full song. That's all sufficiently weird enough for me to ruminate on, but I'm willing to guess that TV edit-specific instrumentals or structural changes aren't unheard of, since I just haven't watched many shows.

No, the reason I can't get this specific TV edit out of my head is that the additional lines from the first post-chorus basically recontextualize the entire song and give it a dramatically different tone.

(Everything from this point onward is lyrical analysis, which is going to be unavoidably dodgy since I'm working from volunteer translations.)

Changing and rearranging the lyrics is inevitably going to modify the feeling the song invokes, even if the effect is very slight. Even something as simple as cutting off the second half can lead to very different meanings, depending on what the cut lyrics do in the song's progression, be it further clarify, reframe, or even refute earlier lyrics. But by and large the changes made to the lyrics in the TV edits of theme songs are relatively minor; they may change the reading of some lyrics, but the broad strokes are the same. “kieru daydream” is about a bitter inability to move on and heal, “Kimi no Shiranai Monogatari” is about a hidden longing from long ago, and “Naisho no Hanashi” is about a particularly jealous longing, all fitting to various degrees for the main character(s) of the corresponding arc. (Exhaustingly so, in the case of the Araragi sisters.)

youtube

The full version of “Ai wo Utae” can be split into three parts, each punctuated by the post-chorus. After the intro (”Following my heart/I'll say out my true feelings/In my own way, now”), the first part establishes the nature of the singer's problem, mainly their inability to properly act upon their feelings, and the negativity that follows as a result. The chorus consists of a theoretical confession that affirms the singer's determination but is cast aside, noting in the post-chorus that they "can't say anything thoughtlessly" and metaphorically hitting the reset button. The second part largely grapples with the frustration and difficulty of feeling and expressing love, culminating in an inner lash out and rejection that goes away when the singer realizes that will not help their predicament. The third part starts with the bridge, in which the singer appears to steel themself as they are about to confess, which continues into the pre-chorus and chorus where the singer is directly addressing their crush, ending with the post-chorus with references to eyes meeting and no more fear.

It's a song broadly about the emotional hardship of falling in love, coming to terms with it, and confronting it head on. It ends on a hopeful note. The parallels to Hanekawa's arc in Nekomonogatari (White) are fairly self-evident.

The TV edit's changes to the first part make it seem like the confession in the chorus is happening in the moment with the addition of the last post-chorus above, before the original post-chorus chimes in.

This suggests that the confession in the lines of the post-chorus, which appeared to be actually happening in the full version, was instead an extension of the theoretical confession of the chorus that the singer hits the reset button on. It’s a stinger that pulls the rug out from under the previous buildup and suggests an emotional stagnancy that makes the TV edit a song about the inability to follow through with your feelings.

I don’t really know what to make of this change and my subsequent read of it. I wouldn’t be all that surprised to find out that other TV edits exist that change the song to this extent. But it’s the only one I’ve seen so far, and I just think it’s really, really weird. Weird enough to compel me to splice those last lines of the TV edit onto the full song because I hate happy endings, I guess

#ai wo utae #ai o utae #luna haruna #nekomonogatari shiro #nekomonogatari white #tsubasa hanekawa #monogatari series second season #tsubasa tiger #monogatari #anime

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ryqoshay · 3 years

Text

Putting on Hairs: Favorable Dress

Primary Pairing: YohaRiko Hinted: KotoUmi Words: ~2.4k Rating: G? Maybe mild T for one of the implications...? AU: Theater, Werewolf, Werebeast, Monster, Cryptid, Angelic, Demonic

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Author’s Note: I honestly can’t remember the last time I’ve written this much in this short of time...

Summary: Riko is hoping Kotori and Yoshiko can make a dress for her. But nothing is free...

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Riko approached the costume department with severe trepidation. Her heart was actively trying to pound itself out of her chest at the thought of facing her. Well, not her specifically, she knew she would feel this way about anyone of her kind. But right now, she was the one here.

But, of all the places in this amazing, wonderful world, why did she have to fall here? In this country? In this city? And now she was working at the same theater where Riko had just recently been hired.

Of course, the very same thing could be asked of Riko herself. Why did she have to flee to this particular island off the main coast? Choose this particular city? Accept a position playing the piano in the orchestra pit of this particular theater?

Was this all His idea of a cruel joke?

It was bad enough that she had stood so close during the meeting earlier in the day where the theater’s premiere patron was introduced. Why did she have to do that? Did she not sense Riko like she sensed her? Was she not uncomfortable with Riko’s presence as Riko was with hers?

Riko sighed. Why was she even doing this? Well, she needed a dress. But surely, she could just go find one at a local shop, right? Did she really need to deal with her to have one made special? But the examples she had see so far were just… otherworldly; so much better than anything she had seen window shopping around the area.

“Ah, Riko-chan!” An ashen blonde head poked into the hallway, startling Riko. “Yoshiko-chan was right when she said you were coming. Welcome! Come on in!” Kotori ushered the redhead into the room.

“Pardon the intrusion…” Riko said as she stepped through the door, immediately needing to resist the urge to turn back and run.

There she was, black wings spread wide in all their glory and looking as powerful as any other angel, despite her fallen status. And she was… trimming fur from a black kitten in her lap? What?

Yoshiko looked up with a surprisingly cheerful smile. “Welcome to Hell Zone, Riko!”

“Hell… Zo… eh?” Riko’s gaze flitted fervently around the room, seeking hellforged artifacts or demonic runes or something, anything that might imbue the area with the powers of Hell. And while she certainly sensed auras radiating off most of the equipment and tools, nothing appeared to be of infernal or divine origin.

“Or would you prefer I call you Pirum?”

“Eehhh?!” Riko aborted her vain attempts to scour the room as Yoshiko uttered her true name.

“Kind of a strange name for a demon, though…” Yoshiko continued as if she hadn’t noticed Riko’s reaction. “Do you guys even have pears down there?”

“Now, now, Yoshiko-chan,” Kotori chided playfully “we shouldn’t scare our clients like that. Now, what can we do for you, Riko-chan?”

“Uhm…” Riko fidgeted with her fingers, trying desperately to resist fleeing. “Kurosawa-san recommended I check with you about having a dress made for an upcoming recital?”

“Of course!” Kotori chirped. “We would be happy to make something for you.”

“She, uhm, didn’t give me an idea about pricing though…”

“Oh, don’t you worry your pretty little head about that.” Kotori smiled. “You’re in the orchestra here, right?”

“Yes… but…”

“So, we’ll make the dress for you and you can just owe us a favor.”

Something about the sparkle in the costume designers eye made Riko feel a bit ill at ease. More so than she already was.

“I’m not sure…”

“Surely you know about favors, right?” Yoshiko spoke up. “Your boss’s boss is fond of them, right?” She offered a decidedly devilish grin.

“Uhm…” Riko felt her knees start to shake.

“Don’t mind them.” A deep, masculine voice said from… somewhere. Riko couldn’t readily identify the source. “They’re just teasing you.”

“Phobetor.” Yoshiko gently swatted the kitten in her lap.

Wait, that had been the cat that spoke? But its mouth hadn’t moved. How… Then again, it wasn’t the strangest thing Riko had seen, here or down below.

“Sorry if we scared you.” Kotori giggled. “I am serious about the favor, but don’t worry, it won’t be anything beyond what you’re capable of giving.”

“What… did you have in mind?”

“Hrm…” Kotori considered for a moment. “Would you mind show me your wings?”

“Eh? My… my wings?”

“Yes, please.” Kotori nodded. “You’re a demon, right? I don’t think I’ve ever seen a demon’s wings. Are they feathered like Yoshiko-chan’s or leathery and bat-like or skeletal like in some movies?” She seemed to be getting pretty excited about the concept.

“Uhm… could we maybe… close the door first?” Riko requested meekly.

She realized that was closing off her easiest route of escape, but unless it was imbued with some anti-demon inscription or blessed or whatever, it wouldn’t actually prove much of a barrier to her. Also, despite her persisting fear, something in the back of her mind had begun insisting she could trust these two. Or three, really.

Yoshiko hadn’t attacked her on sight. Kotori obviously knew her nature and wasn’t afraid or hateful, rather she seemed genuinely intrigued. And while they had both teased her, neither had been malicious. Even Yoshiko’s mention of her true name had seemed more like an honest, if again teasing, question than some attempt to wield power over her.

Slowly, ever so slowly, Riko unfurled her wings.

Kotori’s eyes grew wide in awe. “They’re beautiful…” She marveled.

Riko blushed. She’d never heard that word associated with her wings before.

“Can I…?” Kotori reached forward.

Riko offered a weak nod before flinching a little as the designer’s hands began exploring.

“Definitely bat-like.” Kotori murmured, moving her fingers gently across the membrane. “A little drier than I expected, but still, lovely material. These will do nicely.”

“M-material?” Riko instinctively snapped her wings back in. “Are you saying you want me to trade my wings for a dress?”

“Not in their entirety.” Kotori replied. “Just a clipping. A little goes a long way, especially when imbued with such power.”

“Uhm…”

“I’m not sure that’s the best idea, Kotori.” Yoshiko spoke up.

“Oh?” The lead designer asked.

“Because demon wings are different than those of an angel, or a crane.” The blue-haired girl explained. “I mean, I’m no expert in demon physiology, but I’m pretty sure she’s got veins and nerves and stuff running throughout. It’s probably hurt her more than when you or I just pluck our feathers; certainly more than trimming Phobetor’s fur.”

��Although,” Phobetor spoke again “with her regeneration, she could very quickly heal the amount I assume you would be taking.”

“Yeah, but…” Yoshiko started.

“And if I recall correctly, that Kanata girl can adjust her abilities to numb rather than put to sleep. She’d be fully regenerated before she actually felt anything.”

Kanata? “Konoe-san?” Riko asked. “I thought I felt another demonic presence here.”

“Indeed.” Phobetor stood and stretched before yawning. “Although she is here for different reasons than you. While she is here to feed, you seem more interested in music. Pray tell, did you grow weary of playing Hell’s music and came to Earth for a change of pace?”

Riko blinked. “How… how did you know?”

“One of my primary duties is to run reconnaissance and monitor all local entities that could pose a threat to my master.” The cat explained. “Celestials, especially demons, are always worth investigation.”

“I see… wait, so you’ve been spying on me?”

“Indeed. And I have determined that you are not a threat to my master, Ms. Pirum.”

“… Oh…” Whatever was left of Riko’s fear was displaced entirely by embarrassment. “I see, well… uhm… Anyway, Riko is fine…”

“Very well. Riko it is.” Phobetor gave a single, curt nod. “Though it must be said that my assessment is not an indictment upon your power. You are still a demon after all. Rather, I have determined you to be far too… demure, for lack of a better word.”

“… Oh…”

“Also, your reading proclivities are quite… interesting, I must say.”

“Eh?”

“Oh? What kinda books do ya read, Riko?” Yoshiko perked up suddenly. “Earth is filled with a ton of strange tomes and some of their ideas on magic and such are utterly baffling. Though there are some amazing artists who create some amazing manga and doujin. Humans can tell such wonderful stories.”

“D… doujin…” Riko felt herself blush.

“Yeah, have you ever been to Comiket? Mortals sure know how to celebrate their hobbies.”

“She has attended.” Phobetor confirmed.

“Phobetor…” Riko whined.

“Really?” Yoshiko became even more excited. “Maybe we should go together this year.”

“… Maybe…”

“I do believe your tastes are vastly different, though.” Phobetor said.

“Oh? What kinda stuff do you like, Riko?” Yoshiko asked again.

“Uhm…” Riko hesitated.

“Her preferred reading material is…”

“<Stay thy tongue, meddlesome furball!>” Riko snarled in an ancient demonic language.

The other three occupants in the room stared at her in stunned silence.

Riko’s hands flew up to clamp across her mouth as heat exploded across her cheeks, spreading quickly to her ears and down her neck.

Yoshiko snorted.

“I’m… I’m so sorry…” Riko cried, her voice muffled through her fingers. “I didn’t mean…”

Yoshiko burst out laughing. Kotori giggled.

“I thought… you said… she was too demure…” Yoshiko managed get out between bouts.

“That seemed like the best description at the time.” Phobetor stated matter-of-factly.

“Are you… sure… she’s not a… threat?”

“My assessment remains unchanged.”

Why in the nine circles did you have to go and do that, of all things? Riko berated herself. She was so embarrassed she felt she could die and go back to Hell. Well, maybe not. She really had no desire to return.

“There, all done.” Kotori suddenly announced.

“Eh?” Riko came back to reality. “Done? Done with what?”

“Your measurements.”

“Measure…”

“For your dress.”

“Yes, I know, but… when did you…?”

“While you, Yoshiko-chan and Phobetor-chan were talking.”

“I didn’t even notice.” Riko admitted.

Kotori smiled. “I’ll draw up some proposed designs and give them to you tomorrow.” she explained. “Once you decide on one you like, we can get to choosing fabrics.”

“Alright.” Riko agreed. “Oh, uhm… about the favor…”

“Oh, don’t worry about the wing thing.” Kotori dismissed. “We’ll think of something else, it’s fine.”

“Well, if you don’t mind my asking, what did you intend to do with the trimmings?”

“Make leather of course. There are a lot of costumes and accessories that need leather, belts, shoes, jackets, all sorts of things.”

“So, it would be used for the theater?”

“Of course!” Kotori chirped. “Everything I do is for Umi-chan’s theater.”

“Unless someone else like Riko comes and wants something made for a non-theater event.” Yoshiko pointed out.

“Well, yes, but the favors we ask in return always benefit the theater.”

“That’s true.” The fallen angel conceded.

Riko steeled herself for what she was about to say. “I’ll do it. You can use some of my wings to make costumes for the theater.”

Kotori’s eyes widened as she inhaled with excitement. “Really?” She grabbed Riko’s hands and pulled herself closer. “You’ll let me make celestially imbued leather?”

“Y-yes...”

“Oh, thank you, Riko-chan!” Kotori surged forward and wrapped her arms around the redhead.

“Hey, Phobetor,” Yoshiko addressed her cat “you wanna go tell Kanata she’s on notice for numbing duties?”

“Will do.”

With that, Phobetor blinked out of existence. Is he a teleporter? Riko wondered.

“Well, we don’t have to do it right away.” Kotori said, pulling out of the hug. “I won’t collect payment until I know my customer is satisfied with the product I am selling them.”

Yoshiko shrugged. “We’re only putting her on notice.”

“Message has been delivered.” Phobetor’s voice sounded before he popped back into the room. “She said it would only take her a second, so we can have her do so whenever we are ready.”

“Only a second, huh?” Yoshiko pondered something for a moment. “I wonder if her sleep spell works that fast too.”

“I would imagine it takes effect quickly, for the sake of facilitating faster feeding.”

“You mentioned feeding before.” Riko said. “She’s not… eating people… is she?”

“Their dreams.” Phobetor responded. “She calls herself a Somnophore, though I believe Somnophage would be more accurate. But who am I to judge such things?” The cat seemed to almost shrug. “I am surprised you did not know.”

“I sensed she was a fellow demon.” Riko admitted. “But I hadn’t had a chance to determine what kind.”

“I’d let her feed on my dreams…” Yoshiko seemed lost in thought.

“Why, do you want her to put you to sleep, Yoshiko-chan?” Kotori asked.

Yoshiko chuckled. “It would help some nights.”

“Well, Kanata-chan seems to love the pillow I made for her.” Kotori explained. “It’s stuffed with a special blend of our feathers and she says it works wonders.”

“A pillow, huh?” Yoshiko turned her head and shifted one of her wings over for inspections. “I never thought about making one of those.”

“I’d be happy to show you how.”

“Alright.” Yoshiko agreed. “Although I’m surprised you didn’t make one for your precious Umi.”

“Of course, I made one for Umi-chan.” Kotori giggled. “But that was years ago, long before I came here. So that one was made with just my feathers. I made one for Honoka-chan then as well.” Her eyes sparkled as she seemed to be reviewing fond memories. “They still have them to this day.”

“Anyway, we should probably get back to work.” Yoshiko hopped up to her feet and moved across the room. “And I know you have rehearsals coming up. It was nice meeting you, Riko.” She smiled and reaching out a hand.

“Likewise.” Riko agreed, accepting the handshake.

“Phobetor tells me you’re quite good on the piano. Which makes sense, given who you serve under.”

“Well, not really.” Riko shook her head. “Not anymore.”

“Ah, I see.” Yoshiko nodded. “I can empathize completely. I haven’t served Him in a good long while.”

“Mm…”

“Anyway, I still look forward to hearing you play.” She grinned. “Maybe Kotori will let me out of this hell every once in a while, so I can head upstairs and listen a few times.”

“Awuuu…” Kotori pouted. “Yoshiko-chan, don’t make me out to be like some hellish taskmaster.” She blinked and turned to Riko. “No offense.”

Riko chuckled. “None taken. There’s certainly no shortage of taskmasters down there. That’s part of why I came up here.” With that said, she turned toward the door. “I’ll see you two… sorry, three, later.”

Words of departure and well wishes followed Riko into the hallway, and as she walked, her thoughts remained on the individuals she had just met. They were an interesting group, to say the least. But friendly, even to a demon like her. Maybe… perhaps, just maybe, working in close proximity to an angel wouldn’t be all that bad after all.

----------

Author’s Notes Continued in Followup Post

#YohaRiko #YoshiRiko #Sakurauchi Riko #Tsushima Yohane #Minami Kotori #Phobetor #Love Live Sunshine #Love Live #Putting on Hairs #fanfic #Tsushima Yoshiko

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imalifegen89 · 3 years

Text

A Legacy Left Behind - Chapter - 7 - When the Past Unfurls - Part I

Rating: Mature

Category: M/M

Fandoms: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1, Hawaii Five-0 (2010)

Relationship: Steve McGarrett/John Sheppard

Characters: Steve McGarrett, John Sheppard, Danny "Danno" Williams, Evan Lorne, Bates (Stargate), Laura Cadman, Alicia Vega, Kono Kalakaua, Adam Noshimuri, PO Higgins (OC), Samantha "Sam" Carter, Jack O'Neill, John McGarrett, Dr. Lam, Catherine Rollins, Wo Fat, Original Goa'uld Character(s), Original Characters

Additional Tags: Action/Adventure, Action & Romance, Military, Hurt/Comfort, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Violence, Character Bashing, Not Catherine Rollins Friendly, No DADT, Swearing

Summary :

"Sure John, I'll call," He promised as the SUV came to a stop in front of them. He and Danny both got in and seated themselves. He then gave a short wave to John who was still standing there by the exit watching them leave. Steve hoped what John had told him would be true, that his dad would be able to make it through. He was not ready to lose his only remaining parent. ‘God please, not again! Not so soon ...' His mind was repeating the mantra as Steve let out a weary sigh and closed his eyes."

Steve will find out about what happened to his father, who was involved in it, why it happened and so much more than he ever bargained for...

Hello All, Here's the next part of the series, and it's a two-parter. There are some plot twists on the way and hope you all will enjoy it.

Aethir - Thank you so much for your hard work and for finding some time to help me with editing, commenting, and giving out very helpful tips and suggestions. Idea bouncing and snark is always so much fun with you!!!

Part 1 - Honolulu General

Honolulu General Hospital

Hawaii

The six-hour-long flight in the old and noisy Globemaster had left both SEALs travel-weary and sleep-deprived. Neither had talked much during the flight, trying to catch a few hours of shut-eye, but among the jarring engine noise, the comms chatter, the endless shuddering, and the training maneuvers, that had been impossible. At the end of the flight, they had thanked the crew and disembarked with relief, each carrying their single duffel.

They were both on leave and therefore in civilian clothes, and instead of the usual armory they carried around, they only had their handguns and with extra clips in their bags. Although they were only making a visit to the hospital, neither of them was willing to go completely unarmed.

A short taxi ride brought them to the hospital from Hickam closer to the midday visiting hours. They figured if needed, they could wait in the hospital until they could see John McGarrett.

……….

"Hello, My name’s Steve McGarrett, I got a call last night about my father. Somebody named Curtis called me," said Steve, presenting his credentials to the male nurse manning the reception area of the Outdoor-Patient-Department. The nurse - L. Rider, according to his name tag - gave Steve and his ID a once over and started accessing his system.

"Yes, Mr. McGarrett, your father's been moved from the ICU. He’s in room 308. You can take that elevator to the left," he informed.

“Thanks.”

Steve and Danny both took off towards the given directions.

The room Steve's father was in wasn't hard to find. It was located on the third floor and the room had the number and the name 'John McGarrett' on a plaque clearly displayed. It also had 'Dr. Leonard T. Lester - Cardiologist' listed as his primary care physician.

"I'm going to go look around and find some coffee. Do you need anything?" Danny asked. He was going to give his friend some time with his dad before going in.

"Yeah sure, I could use some coffee.”

……….

During the six long hours he’d had to think about what happened, Steve’s mind had been busy contemplating some horrible scenarios. He hadn’t realized that he had been subconsciously bracing himself for the worst. Nobody in his family had any history of heart attacks and he didn't know what to expect, what to do or how to prepare. Being the trained planner that he was, Steve found the lack of knowledge rather unsettling.

What the nurse at the reception told him, gave him hope though. He theorized that since his dad's already been moved from the ICU to a regular room, his condition shouldn't be that bad.

Steve took a moment to compose himself, watching Danny as he walked away. Then he took a deep breath and knocked on the door before entering room 308.

……….

He stood still by the door to take the scene in.

His dad was lying on the bed and a white and blue hospital gown was peeking out from underneath the white blanket. There was a monitor attached to his chest and Steve could see the leads disappear through the opening of his gown. The apparatus was quiet and its screen indicated a steady rhythm while John McGarrett slept. Steve noticed there was an IV connected to his dad's left hand as well. He scrunched up his nose when the strong odor of antiseptics hit him in the face, contrasting starkly with the smell of gun oil and Old Spice aftershave he usually associated with his dad.

McGarrett senior was sleeping peacefully and didn't seem to be in any pain. Steve was content to let his dad be, preferring to let him wake up on his own. As he stepped further into the room, he saw a chair by the bed and lowered himself to it slowly, mindful not to make a sound. Then he placed his duffel bag on the floor and settled in to wait.

Maybe it was his instincts of being an active duty police officer - John McGarrett surfaced from his slumber knowing that there was somebody in the room with him, within a few minutes of Steve’s entrance. The slight change in the rhythm of the heart monitor alerted Steve to the fact. Not wanting to startle him, Steve leaned forward and addressed his father softly.

"Hey dad," he reached to touch his hand, the one without the IV needle.

"Steve!" His dad's eyes went wide, realizing his son was sitting by the bed. "What are you doing here?" John knew Steve was deployed and he was the last person he expected to see in the hospital this early. He hadn’t even been in here for 24 hours.

"The hospital called me and told me you had a heart attack," Steve explained. He was relieved to see that his dad was speaking clearly and wasn't showing any signs of disorientation or pain. In fact, he looked quite normal. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm alright," John smiled at the raised eyebrow he received from his son at that. So he elaborated. "Just a little tightness in my chest area. But the doctor says it's normal after an attack. Other than that, I really am feeling fine. To be honest, I didn't even know what it was. I only knew I had a heart attack when Dr. Lester told me this morning," He was more curious as to how his son got here so quickly. "Where were you when they called you?"

"Colorado Springs." Steve smiled. He couldn't really get into details about his deployment or his whereabouts other than that, but he was glad that he was in the States to make this trip.

"Hah, and you’re here already. That was quick,"

"Yeah, I got lucky and caught a transport.”

Steve was more than happy to just sit there and exchange pleasantries all day long. But he needed to know what happened first. He got up to go and fetch a glass of water for his father from the bedside table. "Dad, what happened?"

His dad took it and drank some water before handing it back to Steve. Then he turned on his bed to fully settle on his back. Steve put the glass away and leaned towards his dad, giving him his full, undivided attention.

"It was the weirdest thing, kid," said the senior McGarrett, frowning as he cast his mind back to the chain of events that led to his sudden health failure. “I was in that small grocery shop by the filling station near home. I had just finished filling up the tank on the truck and was getting some stuff for the weekend. I remember walking towards the counter to pay and that’s it - for the life of me, I can't remember having any pain or calling for help or anything. I was standing there one moment and was waking up on this bed the next.” He paused to take a deep breath and then exhale slowly. “Then there’s this fellow - Dr. Lester - is telling me how lucky I was to come back from a severe myocardial infarction with no visible damage to my heart,” he made a face, remembering his earlier conversation with the overly cheerful doctor who described the incident in vivid medical detail.

“How’d you get here?”

“He said that the shop owner called for emergency services and sent me here. Apparently, I coded on the way, but they managed to get my heart started again without much fuss. And now, here I am.” John finished recounting the incident.

Steve rubbed a hand across his face, trying to take it all in.

“I wouldn’t obviously know what to expect, it’s not like I’ve had a heart attack before - but I'd have thought that at least you get some kind of a warning sign, you know? Like breathing difficulties, chest pain or something,” McGarrett senior continued after a moment. “Not this going about your normal day-to-day business, and then a complete blackout, followed by waking up in a damn hospital bed - it just doesn't feel normal,” his frown deepened.

Steve didn’t say anything for a long while. He just took his time to sit there and watch his dad who seemed to be doing pretty much okay after going through such an experience. He was immensely relieved and was happy to take his time to enjoy the feeling, letting go of the worry and stress that had built up since the moment he’d received the call.

A knock on the door interrupted the comfortable silence in the room and Danny Williams entered carrying two styrofoam cups of coffee.

“Ah there you are, Cap, how are you feeling?” He asked, handing over a coffee to Steve and coming closer to stand near the bed railing.

“I’m feeling alright, considering,” John smiled crookedly. “Where’s my coffee, Williams?”

“Hey, I don't think coffee is on the approved list for you,” Danny grinned. He was glad to see the man looked healthy enough for someone who had just had a serious health scare, fit to be up and making demands. “Besides, this hospital swill is so bad it might just give you a different problem or three,” he sipped his coffee and grimaced theatrically to prove the point. “So when are they letting you out?”

“Don't know yet, my doctor is supposed to drop by any time now. I don't think I need to stay here any longer at all.” John stated confidently. He was not accustomed to sitting around on a bed all day, especially when he wasn’t feeling different from any other day.

“Let’s let the doctor decide that, yeah dad? As you said, this is the first time something like this has happened to you and they just might need to keep you under observation for a bit - just saying,” Steve cautioned.

He knew his dad and he could see the stubborn man was already planning on going home, to start acting as if nothing happened. He might even insist on going to work unless the doctor gave him strict orders to rest and take it easy for a while.

“Which reminds me, do they know at the station that you are here?” Steve asked his dad before he could start protesting about staying put in the hospital. “I tried calling Kelly before I left, but it went to voicemail,”

“No, I’m on leave - only due back the day after tomorrow,” his dad replied somewhat petulantly.

The room door opened again, this time granting entry to a short, balding Hawaiian native. The name tag embroidered over the chest area of his white coat identified him as Dr. L.T. Lester. He smiled cheerfully at all of them and went to the nearest monitor connected to McGarrett senior.

“So how are you feeling today, John?” the doctor inquired while studying the monitor.

“I’m fine doc, when do I get to go home?” John got straight to the point.

The doctor continued taking readings and making notes with an amused smile on his face. Then he went to unclip the chart hanging on the bed railing and made a few notes on it. After that, instead of answering his reluctant patient, the doctor turned to Steve and Danny to introduce himself. At the end of exchanging pleasantries, he finally turned to address John.

“Well, Mr. McGarrett, I can see you’re doing quite well and your readings are good. But, as I explained to you earlier, what you went through is quite serious and you might have damage to your heart muscle.”

Then sensing the alarm from the visitors of his patient, the doctor hurried to explain. “It’s what happens during a heart attack. The blood flow into the heart gets interrupted and it goes into a sort of overdrive trying to restore the flow. This overactivity can cause damage. Your dad was quite lucky that people near him reacted quickly and sent him to the hospital on time.” The doctor smiled again.

“So, what’s next, doc?” Steve asked.

“We do need to assess the possibility of damage and the cause of the infraction. The most common reason is usually coronary artery disease, which means cholesterol clogging the arteries. There are some instances this could happen if you were experiencing a seizure with severe spasms and contractions. We’ll need to run some tests to determine the cause and then plan steps for the recovery,”

“And how long will all this take?” The McGarrett senior looked crestfallen, resigned to the fact that he wasn’t going to get out soon.

“I actually have you scheduled for some of the tests now. Some blood work, an EKG, and a scan. An attendant should be here shortly to take you for those,” Then the doctor turned to Steve and Danny. “The tests will take about an hour or so. If you need to step out and have a meal or something, now would be the time.”

An elderly female attendant entered the room quietly, pushing a wheelchair as the doctor finished, and started unhooking Steve's dad from his various monitors. Steve took the doctor's advice and took his leave with Danny, after letting his dad know that they’ll be back once the tests were done.

……….

“Well, I’ve gotta admit man, your dad’s right. That does sound weird.” Danny said after listening to Steve about what happened.

“Why?” Steve frowned.

“My uncle Mario had a heart attack a couple of years ago. The man was moving some heavy boxes around. He’d been sweating buckets and breathing through his mouth for about an hour when my aunt found him and made him take a break. Then he felt pain in his chest and aunt Rea took him to a doctor. The doctor took one look at him and sent him to an ER. He’s been suffering from a heart attack for hours by then,” Danny paused and tried to remember the exact details his mother told him about what happened to his uncle. “He is fine now. He had to have a bypass and has to stay away from all the greasy food and the alcohol, but he made it,” he said inspecting the sandwich he took from the vending machine. They were both seated in the hospital cafeteria with bottles of water and sandwiches.

It was crowded and almost all the tables were full with families huddling together having lunch - most probably waiting for news about their loved ones. It wasn’t that noisy, despite being crowded to capacity - and nowhere near cozy or inviting - as one would expect from a busy dining area. It felt as though the sense of expectation, the sense of happiness, and the overpowering sense of grief had all tangled up together to create a very subdued atmosphere. Even the smell of food mixed with the underlying odors of disinfectant contributed to the gloom that pervaded over the souls lost in their own private worlds.

“Wow, I’ve forgotten how crappy the hospital food is. This doesn't look like a roast beef sandwich man,” Danny sniffed at it. “Sure doesn’t smell like it either.” Then he shrugged and started eating. It didn’t taste much better either, but he was hungry after the long flight.

Steve didn’t say anything as he nibbled on his food. He wasn’t really hungry but knew he had to have something to keep his energy up. He was thinking about his dad’s recounting of the incident. He hadn’t said anything to his dad earlier, but the more he thought about it, the less it made sense. What Danny was telling him also made it clear how unusual the whole thing was. He made up his mind to pop into the shop his dad was in, later when they left the hospital. Maybe he could talk to the shopkeeper and even have a look at their security footage if they had any. He might even find something that could explain his dad suddenly suffering a heart attack. Maybe there was something that his dad had forgotten to mention.

He needed to get in touch with Sheppard as well, to let him know his dad’s condition. He knew that John would worry until he heard from him. Taking the last bite of his sandwich, he decided now would be the best time to make that call.

“Listen, I need to call Shep and let him know dad’s alright. I’m just gonna be over there by that balcony,” he told Danny as he stood up, fishing his phone out of his jacket pocket. Then he walked to the area he pointed, dialing Sheppard. “Be right back.”

………..

The sweet and subtle smell of her perfume reached Danny first, as he realized the lady who was wearing it was standing right in front of him. He looked up and saw the familiar, smiling face of Lieutenant Catherine Rollins looking down at him.

“Well, hello!” He grinned. “Fancy running into you here, of all places,” he gestured at the seat Steve had just vacated. “Take a seat,”

“Thanks,” Rollins smiled charmingly as she sat. “I’m just here visiting a friend of mine. She just had her second baby - a cute little baby boy,” her face took on the same expression all women wore when talking about babies. “I popped in here to get a drink and then I saw you,” she said. “I thought you guys were in Colorado? Is everything ok?” Her expression turned into one tinged with concern.

“Yeah, everything’s fine. I’m here with Steve, actually. We got a call about his dad, but he’s alright. We just saw him,” Danny explained without going into much detail. He noticed the Lieutenant perking up at the mention of McGarrett junior.

“He’s over there, on a call.” he pointed with his head.

Steve was leaning over the balcony with his elbows resting on the railing and busy talking to Sheppard. He didn’t see the new arrival as he had his back to them.

Danny saw the wattage of Cathrine’s smile go up as her eyes ran over the view the oblivious SEAL presented. He hid the grin and blinked at her innocently when she turned back to face him.

“So, will you guys be here for a few days then?” She inquired, her gaze snapping back to where Steve was, almost unintentionally.

Danny knew she was mostly interested in finding out whether Steve was going to be around for a while.

“Well, that depends.” He hedged. “We have to see his dad’s doctor and see how it goes,”

He didn’t want to give any definite answers or any other details without Steve’s say so. He opened his bottle and drank some water, wishing Steve would soon return. So that he could decide what to tell this infatuated Lieutenant who was back to staring at Steve’s ass with a dreamy look on her face. Then something started to nag at Danny about what she said earlier, but he couldn’t place it. He pushed it away to sort out later as he saw Steve finishing his call.

……….

“Yeah, so that’s what happened. He seems alright and man, that’s a relief. Depending on what his tests and scans show, it’ll be a day or two more. But I’ll message you when I find out,” Steve said to John, who was quite relieved at the fact that Steve’s dad was fine. He insisted that Steve take as much time as needed to make sure his dad got all the support he needed. He also made Steve promise to message him with updates and implored him to take care of himself before finally ending the call.

Steve put his phone back inside his jacket with a smile. He very much appreciated the time he was given to take care of his dad. Moreover, he was deeply touched by the way Sheppard sounded over the phone. He had been really worried and the relief that poured over from his lover through the call was almost a tangible thing. Steve made a mental note to send regular updates as promised. It wasn’t something he would have done for anyone else, but he knew Sheppard would stress otherwise. It felt nice to know that he had somebody who cared that much about him.

He felt the good feeling wilt away when he turned back to see the penetrating gaze of Catherine Rollins directed at him. He was pretty sure he caught her in the act of staring at his ass. She smiled brilliantly at him and waved. Steve was somewhat reluctant to wave back and tried his best to summon a smile for her. He was sure it looked more like a grimace instead.

Steve didn’t have anything against beautiful women. He was definitely not opposed to being the subject of desire of one, either. He had gone out with many pretty women and Catherine Rollins, with her long black hair, soulful brown eyes, and radiant smile was exactly his type. But he was very much invested in another hazel-eyed brunet and he didn’t see himself veering off anytime soon - if ever at all. Even if he wasn’t, Steve knew that he still wouldn’t be interested in this particular woman. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but there was something off about Lieutenant Rollins - something that rubbed him the wrong way - that made him want to be on his guard whenever she was nearby.

“Hi, Steve,” Rollins greeted cheerfully as he walked towards them.

Again, he was instantly put off by the overly friendly greeting. They had only known each other for about 48 hours, hadn’t they? He had to make a conscious effort to return the greeting without letting his true feelings show.

“Hello, Lieutenant,” He asked, more or less politely. “What brings you here?”

Danny cocked his head to the side and narrowed his eyes, picking up on Steve’s discomfort instantly.

Rollins either didn’t notice or didn’t let it bother her because she launched into the story of her friend and her cute little babies with great enthusiasm.

Steve kept the smile plastered on his face as she talked. Then he made a show of checking time and gestured to Danny. “Hey, listen, it’s nice bumping into you here. But Danny and I’ve gotta run. My dad should be done with his tests now,” he said to the woman as Danny got up from the chair to go with him. Steve didn’t want to give her any details about their visit here and hoped Danny hadn’t run his mouth either.

With that somewhat curt parting, he turned and walked out of the cafeteria, with Danny following closely behind.

“So, it isn’t just me, hah? She gives off weird vibes to you too?” Danny asked, turning his walk into a half jog to keep up with Steve’s longer strides. Steve was eager to put as much distance as possible between them and Rollins.

“Yeah, you didn’t tell her why we’re here, did you?” Steve asked while stabbing the buttons on the elevator.

“Nah, not really. Just told her that we’re here for your dad. That’s it.”

“Is she following us?” Steve was staring at the shiny surface of the elevator door.

The reflections on it were slightly distorted. But Danny could discern the shapely figure of Rollins in tight-fitting jeans and green sleeveless top, slowly making her way towards them.

“Forget this,” Steve spat, pressing a few more buttons for various floors on the keypad. Then he swiftly walked away to the nearest staircase and started climbing two steps at a time. He knew his behavior was a bit irrational; she was just a colleague after all, not another enemy combatant gaining on him. Nevertheless, he wanted to get away from her as soon as possible.

When they finally reached Steve’s dad’s room, the man was already there, enjoying his lunch. It didn’t look much better than what they had either. John McGarrett insisted that there was no need for them to hang around since he was just going to take his pills and take a long nap anyway. He could see the boys were tired and wanted them to go home and catch a few hours of sleep for themselves. Steve relented and promised his dad that they’d drop by later around dinner time. He made him promise to call them if he needed anything before that and then finally hugged him fiercely, before taking their leave.

#fanfiction series #stargate atlantis #steve mcgarrett #john sheppard #ao3fic #cross over #hawaii five 0 #stargate #fiction #my writing #writers on tumblr #alternate universe #military #Not Catherine Rollins Friendly #No DADT

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flowerfan2 · 4 years

Text

Context Is Everything - Ch. 2

Complete. McDanno, A03, T, 5600 words

Summary: After Steve is injured during his walkabout, Danny shows up in Seattle and for a moment, it seems like the boys are going to get their fairy tale ending, complete with a magical kiss. But nothing is ever quite that easy.

Chapter 2

That night, Danny thinks about his conversation with Kono, about why she left the island. He can’t sleep, tossing and turning on Kono’s uncomfortable futon couch. It’s hard to reconcile Steve’s need to get away from Oahu with whatever is going on between the two of them. What Steve did in the car, climbing in and planting himself in Danny’s lap, had given him some hope that Steve still wants them to be together, in some form or other. But Steve wanting momentary comfort and physical contact while he’s ill is a long way from an actual relationship.

Danny doesn’t just want to be Steve’s dependable best friend. He’s more than happy to take care of him whenever he needs it, but he wants more than that. He wants to finally be Steve’s partner, in every sense of the word. He thought they were there, at long last, that they had turned the corner into what could be their new life together. For a little while, despite everything, he had been so, so happy.

He knows Kono took a picture of the two of them, squeezed tightly together in Steve’s hospital bed. She had shared it to the group text, and Danny had immediately saved it on his phone. He wasn’t stupid enough to make it his lock screen, although he wanted to. He’s looked at it more times than he can count.

Danny doesn’t want that to be the last time he gets to curl up in bed with Steve, to feel his body up against his own, his breath against his cheek. He thought Steve had been happy too. He knows Steve’s smiles, and his soft, quiet laugh that’s just for him, and when Danny had acquiesced and climbed into that hospital bed, Danny was the recipient of those very special Steve smiles and the quiet laugh. Steve wanted him there, Danny is certain of it.

But then Steve pulled back. It was as if it never happened. Danny felt it like a physical blow, when Steve flinched away from him the next day. He can’t say it was worse than when Steve left the island – that was like bleeding out slowly over the course of the week when it became clear that Steve was actually leaving, that he wasn’t just toying with the idea, that Danny getting kidnapped and shot wasn’t even going to change his mind. He used to think he knew Steve better than anyone. Maybe it hardly counts if Steve doesn’t know what he wants himself, but Danny wishes he would make up his mind.

Scratch that – he doesn’t really want Steve to make up his mind too fast, not unless it’s to decide that he wants to be with Danny.

Danny’s confused, and sad, and he doesn’t know what to do about it.

Talking to Steve is the obvious solution, but he tried that today in the hospital, and Steve shut him down. After that kiss (one of Danny’s more risky moves, but at the time it seemed like a fantastic success) Danny had a whole day of thinking that things were finally, miraculously going to change between him and Steve, that they were actually going to act on this thing that had flickered between them for years.

Then Steve had basically told him to back off, and it all came crashing down.

To make matters more complicated, his team back at home is now constantly texting him on the recently re-named “Danny’s Kiss Is Magic” group text. In response he has continued to pretend that everything is ok, ask for a bit of privacy, and give medically bland updates on Steve’s condition. He doesn’t even want to change the name of the group text, as it might hint at trouble in paradise, and he wants so, so desperately for the trouble to go away.

After tossing and turning for hours, Danny calls it quits and goes into the kitchen for a glass of water. He lingers in the hallway afterwards. Kono’s house is small and cozy, and he can easily hear Steve doing his own tossing and turning in the guest room. Cursing his lack of self-control, he eases open the door and looks in.

Steve is tugging at his blanket, which is apparently twisted around his legs in an entirely offensive fashion. He looks up as Danny opens the door, and then flops back on the bed, defeated.

“That blanket giving you trouble?” Danny asks, unable to help the smile that tugs at his mouth. No matter what else is going on between them, the urge to banter is irrepressible.

“It’s possessed,” Steve says, his voice sleep rough. “I don’t even like blankets. But it’s too fucking cold here to sleep without it.”

“Can I help?” Danny asks. He wouldn’t ordinarily hesitate, but nothing has been ordinary about the past few days.

“Sure.”

Danny helps straighten out the misbehaving blanket, tucking it around Steve’s body like he used to do with Charlie. Steve laughs softly, and then grabs at Danny’s wrist.

Danny lets himself meet Steve’s eyes (eye, one eye, and he’s definitely not going to think about any possibility that the other one won’t heal up perfectly), and braces himself for whatever “it’s not you it’s me” platitude Steve’s about to utter.

“Don’t give up on me,” Steve says, and Danny blinks in confusion. “I know I’m fucking this up. But I don’t mean to. I don’t want to.”

“What, um, what do you want?” Danny asks, his heart beating faster in his chest.

Steve tugs on Danny’s wrist until he sits down, one knee up on the bed, facing Steve.

“I want you.”

Danny can’t really process this, but Steve doesn’t give him any time to question it, reaching out with a hand behind Danny’s head to pull him down for a long, certain kiss.

“Oh,” Danny says, “wow. Really?” His head is spinning.

Steve snorts. “Yeah.”

“Because, um, mixed messages much?”

“Sorry?” Steve pushes at Danny’s elbow where it’s propping Danny up, and Danny slides down on the bed, both of them facing each other. He might have to talk to Steve at some point about using words instead of just shoving Danny around, but then again, it’s kind of hot, so, maybe not.

“Honestly, Steve, you haven’t seemed particularly interested in this-” Danny waves his hand between them “lately.”

“I know. I’m sorry. I can try to explain, but it won’t make any sense.”

“At least that means you’re back to normal.”

“Very funny.” Steve’s expression turns serious. “I do want this, us. I just don’t know how to make it work.”

Danny raises an eyebrow at Steve, and leans in to kiss him again, opening his mouth to tease at Steve’s lips with his tongue. “Pretty sure we can figure it out,” he says, grinning against Steve’s face as Steve grabs at his arm to pull him closer.

They make out for a few minutes, until it becomes clear that Steve is actually far too sleepy for anything more intense. When Danny moves to get out of bed Steve just snuggles in closer, wrapping a heavy arm over Danny’s chest, and it makes something light up inside him. That damn happiness again.

“I’m really sorry I hurt your feelings,” Steve says softly. Danny wants to protest that he’s not a kid and no one has to worry about hurting his feelings, but it’s actually exactly what he needed to hear.

“It’s okay, Steve.”

“’night, Danno.”

“Good night.” Danny shuffles the blanket until it’s covering them both completely, and closes his eyes. He knows Steve still hasn’t really told him what’s going on. Steve’s worry about making it work obviously wasn’t referring to the physical aspect of their relationship (although to be fair, Danny’s got some questions of his own where that is concerned). But rolling along without discussing every little thing has gotten them this far. Besides, he’s pretty sure that Steve doesn’t even know what’s bothering him. It’s as he said to Steve – they’ll figure it out. They have to.

****

The next morning Danny is up long before Steve. He slips out of bed as quietly as he can, showers and dresses and makes a pot of coffee. Steve needs his rest.

Kono had woken up even earlier, shooting Danny a text explaining that she would be back from work in time for dinner, so Danny has the kitchen to himself for a little while.

It’s a peaceful place, Kono’s little house here in the great Northwest. Danny’s never been to this area of the country before. He had expected it to be raining every day, maybe overrun with hipsters drinking overpriced coffee. While the coffee part had turned out to be true, the rain hasn’t been too bad.

His meandering thoughts about the weather are interrupted by Steve walking stiffly into the kitchen.

“Hey,” Danny says in greeting. “Sleep okay?”

Steve smiles shyly, and Danny’s heart skips a beat. God, he’s so smitten, even after all this time.

“Yeah, thanks.” Steve sits down stiffly at the little round table. In the middle of the table is a wooden plate with a leafy pattern that reminds Danny of Hawaii. Steve too, by the way he draws his fingertip over it, a contemplative expression on his face.

“Want some coffee?” Danny asks.

“Sure.”

Danny pours Steve a mug of coffee and sets it down in front of him, then refreshes his own cup and hoists himself up on the counter. It feels familiar, sitting with Steve like this, drinking coffee while they each get ready to face the day. Steve’s kitchen at home has felt awfully empty lately.

They sit quietly for a little while, the silence more comfortable than it’s been for the past few days. Danny takes a few minutes to gather his thoughts, and then decides he’d better give it a try before Steve gets to the bottom of his cup and heads off for a shower or an ill-advised run around the neighborhood or other such nonsense.

This isn’t only Steve’s problem, this difficulty they’re having in getting their act together. Danny’s got to man up, too.

Danny sets his coffee cup down, and takes a breath.

“It’s okay if you haven’t found what you’re looking for,” Danny says.

Steve looks up at him, surprised, and then back down at his coffee cup. “What’s that supposed to mean?” Steve asks, but Danny knows it’s mostly a placeholder, a meaningless phrase to give Steve more time to process the question.

Danny slides off the counter and takes a step towards Steve, his hands twitching against his thighs as he keeps himself from reaching out. “You left Oahu because you thought it would help,” Danny says quietly. “Did it?”

Steve shakes his head, shrugs, catches Danny’s gaze and then lets his eyes flicker away. He’s a second away from dashing out of the room, although with the huge bruises on his side still healing it might be more like a panicked stagger. “I don’t know. Sometimes. Maybe.” Guilt flashes behind Steve’s eyes, and Danny sees it for what it is this time.

“I missed you,” Danny says, determinedly keeping his voice steady. “A lot. A fuck of a lot. But I’m not mad at you for going away.”

Steve gets that little crease between his brows, and he tilts his head. “You’re not?”

“Nope.” He looks directly at Steve, hoping he can see the truth in his eyes. It took Danny a while to get here, admittedly, but he’s sure now. Steve hasn’t been feeling shame about being with Danny. He’s been feeling guilty about them being apart. Kono still feels it, even years later.

If Steve and Danny are to have any hope at being together, Danny needs to let any lingering resentment go, and make sure Steve knows there’s no need for guilt. Steve left because he felt like he needed to, not because he didn’t care about Danny. He trusted that Danny would still be there for him, and Danny needs him to understand that what he did was okay. That they’re still okay.

“Good partners support each other,” Danny says. “I’m all in, whatever you need to do. Even if it means going back to Oahu by myself for now. Drinking coffee with Junior and Eddie, instead of with you.” He waves his hand at the two of them. “I like this a hell of a lot better, though.”

Steve licks his lips, rising from his chair and standing up straight, then taking a step towards Danny. “Can I tell you something?”

The air is suddenly charged, and Danny has to remind himself that he is actually supposed to answer. “Sure.”

“I like it better too.” Steve swallows and grabs Danny’s wrist, holding tight. “Danno, I think I’m ready to go home.”

*****

DW: Chin, if the offer is still open, Steve and I would love to come visit.

CK: That’s great news!

DW: I’ve never spent much time in San Fran, and Steve claims there’s an Italian restaurant that makes better lasagna than I do. I need to prove him wrong.

CK: Whatever floats your boat. I can take a few days off, show you the sights. We could do some day trips, go to Muir Woods to see the redwoods, have lunch in Sausalito.

DW: Sounds great.

CK: Tell Steve I’ll make sure Sara gets her craft stuff out of the guest bedroom this time. We’ll even wash the glitter off the sheets.

DW: We’re going to stay at a hotel. But thanks for the offer.

CK: You’re blushing right now, aren’t you?

DW: Taking the fifth, thanks.

CK: Did Steve mention that the walls are so thin, he could hear Sara singing Taylor Swift all night long?

DW: No, he did not. And if this is an attempt to continue making fun of my taste in music, I’ll have you know that her new album is fantastic.

CK: Nah, it was an attempt to pry into how things are going between you and Steve. In a very subtle fashion.

DW: Chin, I’m surprised at you. You’re usually the grown-up in these conversations.

CK: Just want the best for you, brah. Both of you.

DW: Thanks. We’re okay, actually. I know I have an uncanny ability to screw things up, but this time I’m going to try not to be an idiot.

CK: You’re not an idiot.

DW: Well, time will tell.

CK: Have faith. You’re the most important person in Steve’s life. You have been for a long time. I bet you’re both taking this seriously.

DW: It’s scary, but I think you’re right.

CK: Honestly, Danny, you can do it. You both can.

DW: Thanks, Chin.

TR: So, about this hotel room. Will it have one bed or two? I bet they ran out of double rooms. Might have to put you in the honeymoon suite.

DW: Tani, where the hell did you come from?

TR: It’s the group text, Danny. It’s forever, I told you. We’re never going away.

TR has changed the name of the group text to There Was Only One Bed

#mcdanno #Hawaii Five-O #H50 #H50 fic #Steve McGarrett #Danny Williams #kono kalakaua

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mymcdanno · 4 years

Text

Fic: Love, Danny (4/?)

Summary: McDanno AU based on the movie Love, Rosie.

Author note: Hi friends!! I am finally back with a new chapter, and I promise the next chapters are not so far away. Special thank you to horndog333 on AO3 who inspired me to continue with this. I hope you all enjoy, thank you for reading, and please let me know what you think :)

chapter 1 / chapter 2 / chapter 3 / AO3

“I mean, come on. An arrow flying through the air, that’s pretty cool!” Steve told Catherine, explaining the dream he’d had last night to her. She didn’t seem as excited as he was, though.

“I don’t understand. How can you be a thing?” Catherine said, sounding annoyed as she continued washing the dishes.

“I don’t know, I’ve always had dreams like that,” Steve answered, standing up and bringing the rest of the dishes to her. Talking about his dreams with someone that wasn’t Danny always went bad, but tonight it had been his last attempt at making any conversation that wasn’t Catherine telling him he left the bathroom sink covered in hair again. Or how he forgot to take out the trash.

“Well, next time you have one of your weird dreams, maybe you should dream you’re something useful like a vacuum cleaner. Do you want the cleaning lady to think we’re a pair of fuck-ups?!”

“That’s exactly what we are,” Steve said, staring at her for a minute before grabbing his jacket from one of the chairs, rushing outside with his phone so he could text Danny in peace.

Now that Danny felt like his life was somewhat under control, the weird texts from Steve were the last straw that made him finally book the tickets to Boston.

Kono, always the good friend he needed, had promised to check in regularly on Rachel and Grace and drove him all the way to the airport. “I feel like I need to remind you, he has a girlfriend,” she said, but there was nothing but amusement in her voice. She seemed happy to see Danny so excited.

“It’s funny though, her name didn’t come up once,” Danny said thoughtfully. It was true, Steve had called him many times since he’d bought the tickets but never had he brought up Catherine. Kono smiled.

“Well, have great time Danny, it’s what you deserve,” she said, voice filled with affection, hugging him closely before he disappeared into the airport.

When the airplane landed, nothing could have prepared Danny for how he felt when he saw Steve again. They hugged, so tight that it almost hurt, but neither of them cared. They didn’t want to let go again.

“Hey,” Danny said softly. He couldn’t help but notice the strain in Steve’s smile, though. It was genuine, but looked like it hadn’t been there in a long time. Before he could ask about it Steve had already taken his hand, pulling him with him while he talked.

“So, are you hungry? Tired?”

“No, why?”

“I know just what we need.”

As it turns out, going to a pool party at one of Steve’s friends house was exactly what they needed. They drank, they laughed, they danced. It was freeing, in a way neither of them had expected.

“Gin and tonic,” Steve said, smiling as he handed Danny his drink, and Danny accepted it happily.

“Cell? Car keys?” Someone suddenly said, one of Steve’s friends Danny guessed, appearing right behind Steve. His arms went under Steve’s, like he was getting ready to move him.

“Oh no, oh come on,” Steve mumbled, but he looked amused. “Guys, no!”

“We’re going!” Another guy suddenly appeared, taking Steve’s legs, and Danny was outright laughing now. Was this really happening?

“One, two, three-”

Before he knew it, Steve had been thrown into the pool, drink in hand and everything. The people laughed and cheered, Danny included. He felt bad though, so he kneeled down and offered Steve a hand.

It wasn’t until a moment later he realized his mistake, Steve pulling him down so he fell into the pool with him, Danny yelling in the process.

“You’re looking way too hot now, Danno,” Steve said, almost with a growl.

Danny looked down at himself, realizing his white t-shirt was now completely see-trough. He enjoyed the way Steve was looking at him, he did, but as drunk as he was actually doing something about it was still a big no. So he put on a mischievous smile before he pounced, wrestling Steve underwater while they both laughed and tried not to drown.

The next thing Steve had planned was a picnic in the park. It was almost romantic, Danny thought, but he didn’t dare go there.

They had been talking for a long while, the morning sun creeping up, and it felt easy. Just like the old days where they could talk about everything at any time. It made Danny feel safe, and when he felt safe all his filters went away and sometimes his mouth spoke before he’d thought things through.

“It’s weird to think that I could have lived here, been a part of all this.” Steve was watching him carefully as they lay next to each other on the blanket, nodding as his eyes followed every moment, and Danny continued. “I don’t think I’d change a thing, though, for Grace. And funny thing is, she reminds me more of you than Rachel. That’s probably just because I love her.”

There was silence, and they stared at each other, faces so close they were almost touching. It would have been so easy to kiss him. Danny closed his eyes.

“We should go.”

“... yeah.”

When they got back to Steve’s and Catherine’s house, laughing as they walked in the door, Catherine was looking at them like they’d personally offended her.

“Good morning,” she said stiffly.

“... hi?” Danny said, shooting Steve a worried glance. What was going on here? Why was Catherine acting like that, what the hell had happened?

To no one’s surprise, dinner later that night went awful.

“The wine is very nice,” Danny tried, something to lighten the mood.

“Oh, good. Well, you know I can’t drink,” Catherine said, looking at Steve who had the weirdest face, and hey. That was confusing.

“Sorry, um, why can’t you drink? If- if that’s not a rude question.”

“Steve?” Catherine said, eyebrows raised, like she was surprised that Danny didn’t know something. Steve looked like the earth wanted to swallow him whole, and he stuttered.

“Di- um, did-”

Catherine reached out, taking Steve’s hand. “Steve and I are pregnant. Twelve and a half weeks in.”

to be continued...

i’m going to go ahead and tag some people who have helped me, seemed interested or been tagged in earlier chapters, thank you for your support! and if you’d like to be tagged in the next chapters, please let me know!

@themcinebcnd @auntie17 @mcdannoangelwolf @stephmcx @cowandcalf @nanitaire @surewouldbeinteresting @yoko787878 @joannereads

#my fic #mcdanno #steve mcgarrett #danny williams

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writer-and-artist27 · 5 years

Photo

[Image Description: A comic of two Hero Department students from UA sharing a smile as their friend sings for them in the second panel amongst flowers. The only message in the comic is, “Thank you, Tomoko.” End Description.]

:)) Wing-chan (@wingbladeweaver1357) gave me permission to post this, and well, with midnight close to dawning, might as well add onto it. Story is under the read-more. For the others, here’s more writing. Cherish it. :p

-------------------------------

Note: A thank-you short story to the lovely Wing-chan for the art you see here. You made my day and night, friend. It’s about time I return the favor.

I hate that my birthday had to be overshadowed by real life and politics on the internet side, more so when anxiety makes you think people forget, but oh well. Some things still came through.

Dandelion’s Glory AU, here we go. Based on this comic from Wing-chan. The theme for this return gift is Inori no Uta, from Yuki Yuna is a Hero. Enjoy!

-------------------------------

Before anyone could walk down the stairs and away from the rooftop, a single voice echoed through the wintery air.

“Hikari-chaaaaan! Shinsō-saaaaaaan! Wait for meeeeeeeee!”

Shinsō held back the urge to sigh, rolling his eyes fondly. His breath came out as clouds in the cold winter air anyways, sigh or not. “Is she behind us?”

Hikari snickered into her scarf and nodded to him. “Today’s Valentine’s Day, Shinsō, so you should know what that means! The Chocolate Fairy’s here!” With practiced ease, Hikari turned around and quickly intercepted the incoming hug with her own tight embrace, causing the newest “casualty” to squeal loudly. “Hi, Tomo-chan!”

“H-Hika-chan, heeeeeeey!” Tomoko replied in a high-pitched squeak, apparently not minding her nose being squished in Hikari’s blazer before squirming. “H-How did you know I was coming up behind you?”

“Call it instinct, Tomo-chan, instinct,” Hikari smiled before letting Tomoko go, patting her head. “What brings you to our company?”

To no one’s surprise, Tomoko started to puff out her cheeks, smile turning upside down to match her indignant expression. The extra stomp of her shoe against the pavement merely emphasized her mood swing. “You know why I’m here, Hika-chan! Muuuuuuuu, don’t tell me you forgot after all this time! And with the rumor mill!”

Hikari couldn’t help but snicker, patting Tomoko’s head again. “I know, I know, Tomo-chan. I didn’t forget. What do you have this time?”

“It better not be something poisonous,” Shinsō muttered under his breath.

Tomoko proceeded to round on him with an equally upset look. “Homemade chocolate is not poisonous in my personal dictionary, Shinsō-san! Sheesh, what can a gift-giver do…” she shrugged her shoulders before pulling out a glittery pink gift bag from behind her back. “Which reminds me.” Shinsō took a step back as soon as Tomoko put a hand to her chest, puffing a breath. “Valentine’s Day is not just for lovers! Friends deserve wonderful things too! Sooooo…” Tomoko raised the gift bag in the air. “My first gift goes to—”

Before continuing, Tomoko shot Hikari a pleading look.

Without skipping a beat, Hikari proceeded to clap her hands together in the closest imitation of a drumroll.

“Arigatou, Hika-chan,” Tomoko said gratefully, turning back to Shinsō before placing a hand in the bag and pulling out a star-shaped package. “The first gift for today goes to Shinsō Hitoshi-san, future Hero and wonderful friend who deserves all the fans in the world!”

It could’ve been like a piano had dropped from the sky with how fast the atmosphere changed temperature. It didn’t even feel cold.

Shinsō proceeded to turn a light pink. “Uhhh,” he said intelligently, glancing between the gift and the person giving it. “Thank you…?” With a careful clearing of his throat, Shinsō took the package from Tomoko’s hands, turning his head to the side while rubbing the back of his neck through his scarf. “Yeah. Thanks.” He tucked the gift into the inside of his school blazer. “Thanks.”

Tomoko and Hikari shared a look before giggling. “Aye aye,” the Chocolate Fairy said gently, deciding not to mention her friend’s pink ears before turning to the other person in the area. “Aaaaand without further ado, my other gift.” It doesn’t even take a second for Tomoko to brush her hair back and pull out a heart-shaped package to brandish in the Keyblade Wielder’s direction. “For one of my besties and a person I love very much platonically, Hika-chan!”

Hikari blushed and smiled too. “Aw shucks, thank you, Tomo-chan.” The gift was handled delicately in the exchange, and once both Hero Department students were carrying their respective boxes, Tomoko took a step back. “But uh, Tomo-chan? What are you doing?”

Shinsō blinked too.

Instead of replying, Tomoko smiled and clasped her hands together, closing her eyes.

“I did say that Valentine’s Day is for friends too, didn’t I? So, for the two friends that make my world…”

Tomoko breathed in and out, deeply.

“One song is good enough, isn’t it?”

With one single breath, the air proceeded to be filled with the inflections of a strong singing voice.

“I'm glad that we met (Deaette yokatta)

In the forest that is bright with the sunlight that falls through the trees (Komorebi mabushii mori no naka.)

The wind is always warm. (Kaze wa itsumo attakakute.)

My heart feels like it is going to come undone. (Kokoro hogureteku.)

Praying that days like these would continue forever… (Konna hibi ga zutto tsuzuki masu you ni…)

The wide sky is overflowing with love and hope. (Hirogaru sora wa ai ya kibou de afurete.)

I will continue to sing till this voice reaches you. (Kono koe ga todoku made utai tsuzukeru kara.)”

It was the only thing Tomoko could think up on Valentine’s Day. There was too much focus on romance and love reserved for special others when there was more than that. There were the people who were single, thinking they were alone. People who just wanted friends. People who didn’t want to be alone. This applied to UA High too. The split between General Studies and the Hero Department was vast, but that didn’t mean bridges couldn’t be made.

This moment could may as well be a symbol of such a bridge.

Tomoko put her hopes and efforts into keeping her voice steady, right then at that moment.

“Since the day I was born into this world, (Kono sekai ni sou umareta sono hi kara zutto,)

I clutched onto dreams that filled my hands. (Ryote ni ippai yume wo nigiri shimeteita.)

The future that was drawn would surely come true. (Egaita mirai itsuka hontou ni naru ne.)

A single person is too small to do anything alone. (Hitorija chiisana sasayakide shikanaikedo.)

Our wishes would definitely become a prayer. (Watashitachi nonegainara kitto inori ni naru.)

The wide world is overflowing with love and hope. (Hirogaru sekai wa ai ya kibou de afurete.)

Until this voice reaches you, I will continue to sing. (Kono koe ga todoku made utai tsuzukeru kara.)

Always, always, thank you. (Itsumo itsumo arigatou.)”

The song lasted about 3-4 minutes, but once Tomoko opened her eyes, she met the eyes of her friends and smiled. Hikari and Shinsō smiled back, in their own miniscule ways.

Tomoko giggled and without much else, took a few steps to jump on the two in a hug. “Happy Friendship Day, you two!”

#hoshino tomoko #leonhart hikari #shinsō hitoshi #art stuff #writing #alternate universe #my hero academia #wingbladeweaver1357 #birthday gift #positive vibes #long post #not my art #chocolate seashell

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sojourner-between-worlds · 4 years

Text

Burn the Ships, Chapter Four

A/N: Oh, look at that angst go...

I threw a random Hawaiian word in this chapter, but let’s be honest: if you’ve watched Five-0 for any amount of time, you know that mahalo is ‘thank you’ and that Steve uses the Hawaiian in equal amounts as the English so it just felt weird to not use it with him, tbh. (And if you didn’t know that, well, I just told you, lol)

Content warning: I never intended to write anything super dark or anything for this story, and this chapter isn’t really? but due to the nature of it, I thought I should warn ya’ll anyway because Alex’s trauma is pretty evident all the way through, and some heavier topics are discussed/mentioned including talk of death (not suicide-related), self-depreciation, abuse, and mentions of panic attacks.

. . . . .

Chapter Four

Steve didn’t pause outside this time; he pushed open the door, immediately catching the attention of both Chin and Alex. He schooled his face to not give anything away, and spoke gently. “Hey. Chin, thank you for getting him lunch and bringing him back here. Alex, we need to talk, okay?”

Alex looked back down at the floor. “I’m sorry. I should have stayed in the truck.”

“No, that’s - uh - that’s partly on me. I shouldn’t have brought you along in the first place, but what’s done is done. I’m sorry for putting you in that position in the first place, and I apologize for yelling earlier. Regardless of how I felt, it was wrong of me to lose my temper.”

“You had more right to be angry than I had to break my promise.”

Steve sighed. Alex was determined to justify Steve’s actions while condemning his own, wasn’t he? “Well, let’s just call it even and move on, shall we?”

“Sure.”

“Okay. Great.” He paused; Alex was still avoiding looking at him while he’d been fine with just Chin moments before. He had definitely messed up, but there was nothing to be done now except move forward. “But we do still need to talk -- not about what happened, but there are some other things. So, let’s go back to my office.”

Chin stood up, Alex following suit. “I’ll see if I can catch up with Kono, unless you need me for something?”

“No, go ahead. Last I knew she was headed for the crime lab, so she might still be there. Mahalo, brother.”

“Any time. See you later, Alex.” Chin stepped around where Steve was still standing in the doorway and headed out.

Alex followed after him but turned the opposite direction -- still avoiding looking anywhere but the floor, Steve noticed.

As they passed through the main area, Steve noticed Jerry had already left, everything wiped from the screens, and he made a mental note to text the man later to thank him for all his hard work.

They stepped into his office, and Alex sat down in one of the chairs in front of his desk. Steve sat next to him rather than behind it; if everything Jerry had said was true, he didn’t want this conversation to feel like an interrogation. He wasn’t looking forward to dredging up this kid’s potentially traumatic past, but asking him directly was the only way to really get a solid answer.

Steve took a deep breath and started softly, “I - uh, I took the liberty of having Jerry look into you a little bit more. You weren’t exactly very chatty this morning, and I wanted to find out if there was someone we could contact for you. We found someone, obviously, but… we found a lot more than just that.” Steve paused, trying to gauge his reaction, but there wasn’t one. Alex kept his gaze locked on the floorboards, expression passive. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, trying in vain to catch Alex’s gaze. “What I’m trying to say, Alex, is that I know everything, okay? I know you worked for MI6 after your uncle died, and I know you’re here in Hawaii on a job for the CIA.”

“You don’t know anything.”

“Am I wrong then?”

Silence, then a whispered “no.”

Steve felt like the rug had been pulled from under his feet at the confession. Part of him had been hoping Alex would deny the whole thing, call it crazy, and they could laugh and move on. But another part had known that hope had been a pipedream.

Alex opened his mouth as if to say more but closed it again, swallowed visibly, and kept silent instead.

“Look, you don’t have to talk about it, okay? I’m not asking so I can pry or bring up painful memories. I’m just trying to understand.” He paused. “Just tell me one thing: when they came to you this time, why didn’t you say no?”

Alex shrugged. “Didn’t really give me a choice. I didn’t know Branning was CIA until we got to DC. Took me from the airport straight to his boss.” He swallowed visibly again. “If I’d said no --” a pained smile turned the corners of his mouth -- “I’d have been sent straight back to some group home where no one actually cares. Too messed up for anywhere else.”

Steve was speechless. What had this kid been through in the last few months to feel that way?

Alex continued on, voice less steady than if had been. “A lot of people are dead because of me, you know. Mostly ‘bad guys,’ yeah, but that doesn’t change anything. That’s still on me. Those two this morning -- they weren’t supposed to die. I just wanted to sink the boat. I knew they’d get away with some of it, but I thought if I could catch up to them on land, I could still stop it. Guess I really messed that up didn’t I? And those deaths -- all of them just keep adding up to equal nightmares and panic attacks, and it’s no wonder no one wants to deal with me when I don’t want to deal with me, either.

“So when Branning showed up, I didn’t ask questions; I just hoped it would last longer than the others. When I found out why he wanted me -- well, it just made sense.”

Steve could feel his heart cracking already, but he pressed on anyway, keeping his voice low and gentle. “Can I ask why the others didn’t work out?” And why you felt like you had no choice because of that?

Alex turned his head towards the window, and Steve didn’t miss that his eyes were misty. “Most of them were fine -- better than fine, even. But, like I said, none of them wanted to deal with me.”

“With panic attacks and nightmares you mean? Couldn’t have been that great then, if you ask me.”

Alex snorted. “Maybe. But they were nice enough, at least.”

Steve thought for a moment. “You said that most of them were good. Were there ones that weren’t?” This kid had already been through enough; please don’t tell me adults meant to help him made it worse.

Alex shrugged. “There was one...he was a cop. No one would listen to me, so I ran. Not much else to say.”

Steve swallowed harshly, trying not to let worst-case scenarios take over his thinking. “Alex. What did he do to you?”

He was quiet for a moment before he said, “He was abusive. I tried to report it at school, but…’troubled kid in the system’ and all that, so they just brushed it off as attention-seeking.”

“I see. Is that the real reason why you wouldn’t talk to anyone at HPD?”

“Part of it, yeah. I’ve never really had a good experience where cops are involved.”

“Why did you decide to talk to me?��

A strained smile pulled at his lips. “Because people in the military are the only ones who have never let me down.”

How many people have let you down, Alex? How many people who were meant to protect you have failed? “Just one more question: do you actually want to keep doing this? Do you want to keep working for the CIA?”

Alex turned from the window but only to stare back down at where his hands rested in fists against his knees. “I never wanted this but -- Commander, do you believe in fate? Because this is mine. Every road leads back to this. I don’t have a choice.”

“You always have a choice, Alex.”

“Yeah,” he scoffed. “I used to think that, too. Time has proven otherwise.”

“If you don’t want to keep doing this, then let me help you. I know people. We can get you out --.”

“So I can go back to a group home? No, thanks.”

“Alex --.”

“I said no. So drop it,” he spat.

Steve was taken aback by the sudden change in his tone. “Why not? Why don’t you want me to help you?”

“I told you. It’s no use. Every time I think I’m out, I get sucked back in. There is no getting out. No matter what you do, I’ll end up back here all the same. I’ve had several chances, but I can’t!” His voice had slowly gotten louder, shakier, and more desperate until the final word when his jaw had snapped shut with an almost audible clack.

Steve didn’t miss the slight tremble of his tightly pursed lips or the fine tremors in his white-knuckled fists, and suddenly he knew. Jack Starbright had surely fought for him the whole time -- had maybe been trying to help him in Cairo -- and had met with death as a result. The Pleasures, too. They’d offered him a fresh start, but here he was again anyway.

And he blames himself for everything.

The realization stung, his heart crumbling for this child who had seen and done too much and had only received hurt in return.

“That doesn’t mean you should stop trying,” he pushed out around the lump in his throat. “You deserve to be happy.”

Alex laughed once, short. “No, I don’t. Not after --.”

He had cut himself off, but Steve thought he knew how it was supposed to end. “‘Not after Cairo’?” he spoke barely above a whisper.

“You don’t understand,” he bit out, his voice thick with emotion. “I watched her die. They made me watch, and there was nothing I could do to stop it, and you will never understand that.”

Steve could only watch as Alex lost the fight against his grief, bowing his head as the first tear slipped away. Truth be told, Steve did understand -- a memory of North Korea and Wo Fat and Shelburn at the forefront of his mind -- but he’d had time and support to get through it. Alex had experienced one death after another; he hadn’t been given time to settle before being shuttled off elsewhere; he’d had no time to process and heal.

Before Steve could decide if he should hug this teenager he barely knew or if that would not be appreciated, Alex’s shoulders stopped shaking and he straightened his back, wiping away the last traces of the few tears he had shed.

“I’m sorry,” Alex muttered, “but please just leave it alone. I’m not worth it.”

Steve felt like someone had ripped what was left of his heart out of his chest and had run it through a flour sieve just to make sure there was absolutely nothing left of it. When he spoke, his words were barely audible. “I disagree. I think they would have, too.”

Alex’s breathing hitched again as his head fell forward and he ran a shaking hand through his hair. “Can you leave me alone for a while, please? I won’t leave; I promise. I just -- I’m tired.”

Steve was hesitant to agree. Not because Alex had broken his promise once already, but because he wondered if Alex should really be left alone in this state. He sighed. “Okay. It’s been a long day, and it’s not even over yet. But we aren’t done talking about this, alright? I’ll check in with my team and come back later.”

Alex nodded, so he stood up and, with one last glance back through the door, left the office.

There has to be something more I can do. There has to be. . . .

Alex was exhausted. He slowly uncurled himself from his hunched position in the chair, his breathing still stuttering but better than even a minute ago. As soon as Commander McGarrett had left, he’d lapsed into a panic attack -- hadn’t bothered trying to ground himself, had just let it happen -- and now he was paying the price. His lungs burned and he felt light-headed, but he forced himself up on shaking legs anyway so he could move the few steps over to the couch. He wanted nothing more than a nap now, but he also knew that wouldn’t be happening in such an unfamiliar place, so just lying down for a bit would have to suffice.

As he collapsed onto the cushions, he closed his eyes, digging the heels of his hands into his eye sockets for a moment. What was I thinking, telling him all of that?

Maybe he’ll run away, too. That would make this easier, anyway.

He wasn’t sure how long he lay staring blankly at the ceiling before he realized exactly what McGarrett had said right before he’d left: he was coming back, and they weren’t done talking. He was going to get himself involved, and he was going to get himself killed in the process. Alex couldn’t let that happen. He wouldn’t let that happen.

Pushing himself up slowly, he knew what he had to do. With a pang of guilt, he rifled through the drawers in the desk for a pen and paper. He had promised to stay put, but for the second time that day, he was going to break it. What did it really matter anyway? After today, he was never going to see Commander McGarrett or the Five-0 task force ever again. That thought filled him with an emotion he couldn’t quite place. Bitterness? Regret? He didn’t know, but then again, it didn’t really matter; it never did.

But, he figured, the least he could do was leave a note so they wouldn’t panic over him being missing again.

Thank you for everything, and I’m sorry.

Leaving the note on the desk, he turned and walked out of the office, down the hall, out of the elevator, and through the door into the warm Hawaiian sunshine.

. . . . .

Tag List: @diekatimitdemhutohnehut @ghostly-homo @grungeweasel @just-add-butter

(Let me know if you’d like added/removed!)

#alex rider #hawaii five-0 #crossover fanfiction #fic: Burn the Ships

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blarhiv · 5 years

Note

Hi blar, do you know some new good animes ? I stopped watching them cuz I didn't find good ones especially these new ones are just focused in ecchi somehow they make me cringe, now I'm just reading manga (one piece, attack on titan, Detective conan, akatsuki no yona...)

Anooooonniieeeeee!! Hi!! Finally someone asked about anime!! Omg I'm litereally crying! You even watch One Piece! тттт THIS ANIME IS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ONE OF THE BEST IN THE WORLD AND YOU KNOW WHY 😭😭😭😭

You ask about new anime.. but hmm... Can I just write my favorite? Maybe you didn't watch something... Hope you will like it!!!( writing order doesn't depend on rating).

1) Gintama.

This is unique thing.Jokes,laugh, tears,happiness,sadness,SOUL. Must watch.

2)Acca 13-ku Kansatsu-ka

Unique and original anime of its kind. Amazing atmosphere and music. An excellent combination of style, coziness, unusual characters and political intrigue.

3)Psycho-Pass

"Na, Kogami, kimi wa kono ato boku no kawari ga mitskerareru no ka?" Ahhh... 1st season is something else.Good cyberpunk universe.

4)Gundam:Tekketsu no Orphans

A lot of tears and struggles, your heart will broke into million pieces. But it's worth it. ( I still can't with story of Shino and Yamagi)

5)Yuuri On Ice!

I think you watched it. But aaaaahhhh!!!! I couldn't help but mention my lovely Ice cuties aaaaaaa ( ok. im ok)

6)Sangatsu no Lion

A lot of philosophy. If you like to watch about self-digging and about life, then it's for you.

7)Boku no Hero Academia

Amazing shonen!! Must watch!

8)Haikyuu

One of the favorite sport anime. In good traditions of genre. But there are really a lot of exciting moments.

9)Yakusoku no Neverland.

New anime! Strongly recommend this anime! Wonderful plot,characters,universe,idea. Can't wait 2nd season!

10)Mob Psycho 100

Sometimes it may seem boring, but 2nd season hit me so hard. Very touching. Especially 8 episode!! ттттт

11)Bungou Stray Dogs.

Weeell, interesting characters,plot,atmosphere, PERFECT JAZZ MUSIC,a little philosophy,beauticul picture... You will enjoy this story!

12)Hellsing OVA

TV series is classic, but original plot in OVAs is everythyng.Ohhh and last scene!!! Emotions,setting, entourage, music!!!

14)Clannad

15) Angel beats

With regards to these two anime, I think comments are superfluous here.

16)Kino no tabi(2017)

Incredible atmosphere of travels, really cool main heroine, nice picture and music. Every country that our heroine visiting maintains its own foundations, but if look a little deeper... it all applies to our life. Every city reflects humans sides in society. We are shown a different temperament of people, actions and their consequences, the important role I suppose was played by the names at the end of each city or episode, it can be said as a highlight on the cake that “sums up” this part.

This anime is deeper that you might think.

17) Doukyusei

True art.

18) Natsume Yuujinchou

Warm, touching, soulful story with a unique atmosphere. I always want to cry while watching this anime. And the soundtracks are something magical that always turns my soul inside out.

I will not say a lot..juts think that everyone must watch it.

19) Genroku Rakigo Shinjuu

Oh... difficult to describe all feelings that caused this anime.

It’s like you read old Japanese novel. Tragic of of human in Showa era... Art of Japanese and life path that closely intertwined. Instead of saying a lot of words it’s better to watch by yourself. Definitely this anime has place in the list of masterpieces.

20) Banana Fish

Recent anime filmed by old school manga.

It’s so sad story :( Main characters reminded me of jikook because of their strong bond. Souls bond. It’s very strong and unshakable. Understanding without words,one soul for both.

Yes,it’s so tragic story.

21) Ikoku Meiro no Croisee

I can’t express all of my love for this anime. This is a little piece of warmth, fragility, innocence, tenderness, kindness, sadness, true love. This anime touches your soul: in some moments, your soul just spreads out from the warmth that is born in your soul, and in some moments your soul simply breaks into a thousand fragments.

Please,watch this anime if you didn’t watch it.

( so sad that there is no continuation 😭)

22) Zankyou no Terror

23) Boku dake ga inai Machi

Not a masterpiece, but I think it’s good enough.

24) Dantalian no Shoka

Magical anime!! Love it so much!! ( why such anime don’t get continuation 😭)

25) Grisaia no Kajitsu (and all connected series in this universe).

Yes, maybe it was filmed based on ero game.. and fist episodes weren’t such interesting ( at least for me)... but then... when started last arc of first season... I was speechless. In fact,it’s hard in emotional regard anime :(

26) Onihei

This is one of my favorite anime.

Edo era.Samurai era. Different stories in every episode,like notes from diary of one person from this era, but every episode is full of real emotions,its own morality. Daily life, detective component, social drama, the concept of honor and duty, surrender, justice and simple human kindness. We are all beautiful beings born out of a dream. In this cycle of life. Onihei is truly masterpiece.

27)No.6

You will not remain indifferent watching this sad and sooo touching story 😭

28) Kekkai Sensen

Stylish anime. Interesting to watch.

29) Toradora

Ohh this anime is special for me. I watched it a lot of times... Maybe you will not find here something burning, but Toradora has adorable sides....

30) Kami sama no inai Nichiyoubi

31) Sakurako san no Ashimoto ni Shitai ga Umatteiru

32) Nagi no Asukara

33) Nurarihyon no Mago

Nice anime in shonen genre^^

34) Higashi no Eden

Honestly, I almost don’t remember anything!! Haha because watched REALLY a long long time ago. But I remember that this anime is nice :D

35) Tales of Zestiria

It’s worth to watch ... even only because of absolutely precious relationship of Mikleo and Sorey 🥺🥺🥺 these two... these two 😭😭😭

36) Violet Evergarden

Beautiful and very painful story, high class animation and picture, pleasant music. Long way of becoming a human.

37)Inuyaahiki

38)Nabari no Ou

🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭😭

39) Sekai Ichi Hatsukoi

Omggggg this is very important series for me hihi. From this story started my... fujoshi way 😂😂

..... I can continue this list indefinitely......

Well, I will not write about classic that I think you guys watched( Kuroshitsuji, Guren Lagann,Reborn, Bleach, Fullmetal Alchemist etc etc etc)... and harems and other anime.... I also will not write ahahahahaha

In this season I watch:

-Given

-Bem

-Vinland saga

-One piece of course

- Danmachi ( Yup, I adore all anime ahahah isekai’s and harems TOO 😂😂😂)

I will be glad to discuss about anime again!! And continue this list too 😁😁😁😁😁❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

#ask #anime #recommendation

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gear-project · 4 years

Note

Annon-Guy: Merry Christmas 🎄 to you and your family 👪, Gear Project.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------- Last Impression =by Two-Mix (1998)= -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Kotoba yori wakariaeru, manazashi ga soko ni areba, [If only expressions could communicate better than words,] Hito wa minna ikite-yukeru, mayowazu ni jiyuu ni... [Mankind could live together, never losing their way...]

Ayamachi wo koete, kidzuku hontou no yasashisa, [Overcoming all our Mistakes, we Learn what True Kindness is,] Anata to, mitsuketa kara, Ai to yoberu tsuyosa wo...!! [Because you, and I as well, Found a Strength called Love...!!]

I BELIEVE YOUR LOVE Furue nagara [As we trembled,] Kuchidzuke ni kasaneta Negai [We repeated our Wish in a Kiss] "Anata" ga ite... "Watashi" ga iru... ["You" are here... and so am "I"...] Wasurenaide itsumo... [Please don't ever Forget...]

I BELIEVE YOUR DREAM Tsunoru Omoi... [Feelings that Intensify...] Itoshisa wo Inori ni Kaete... [Turning Affection in to a Prayer...] Kono kodou wo, tsutaetai yo, [This pounding heart, I want to tell you,] Atsuku, Hageshiku... [So Hot, so Fierce...] SO FAR AWAY......

~~~

Arasoiau dake ja erarenai dare mo, nani mo, [Strife alone can never achieve, for Anyone or Anything,] Osanai te ni Sashinobetai, kegare no nai tokimeki wo... [This Pure excitement I want to share with the Next Generation's Hands...]

Odayaka ni toki wo kizamu komorebi no nukumori... [The Warmth of the Sun shining through leaves calmly marking the Passage of Time...] Daremo ga idakaretai zutto kitto eien ni...!! [This is surely what everyone wants to hold on to always for Eternity...!!]

I BELIEVE YOUR LOVE Akiramenai! [Never Give Up!] Kizutsuita Tsubasa hirogete... [Spread open your Wounded Wings...] Habataku Sora, Kagiri no nai Yume wo egaku haruka... [Flying up to the Sky, Sketching out a Boundless distant Dream...]

I BELIEVE YOUR DREAM Egao Misete! [Show me your Smile!] Setsunasa ga afuredashite mo, [Even if you're overflowing with Sorrow,] Kakegaenai ima wo itsuka, hokoritai kara, [Since someday you'll want to be Proud of this Irreplaceable Moment,] SO FAR AWAY......

~~~

Daiji na hito no tame ni nagasu namida, itami ga... [Tears shed for the sake of someone held dear, and the pain felt...] Sekai wo tsuranuki daichi wo nurasu... [It Pierces the World, and Soaks the Land...] Kono kanashimi wo Tometai!! [I want to End this Sorrow!!]

~~~

Merry Christmas, everyone~!

Have a Happy Holiday~!!

#Christmas #This isn't a Gundam Breaker blog!!#This isn't a Gundam Wing blog!!#GP is secretly a Two Mix fanboy #I felt like it!

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saturatedworld · 5 years

Text

He Who Was King

“Ah, Aleksei. Good to see you today.”

“Good evening, sir. I bought snack.”

“How considerate of you! Please come in.”

Another visitation day, another stack of documents to sift through. Neither of them wanted it, yet there he is, welcoming and gentle as always. The smell of freshly brewed tea wafts from inside and clings to his haori. The bandage covering where his left eye was looks clean and soft too. Chizuru Nishiooji is doing well, or at least putting on the appearance which gives the impression.

“I see, so these are the candidates they chose.” Chizuru nods to himself as he reads the documents.

“Sorry it came to this. I know you didn’t want to….”

“This is the agreement we reached. There is nothing to regret about it.” Chizuru says while writing notes on the documents.

Aleksei stirs his tea. Nothing to regret, he said? Aleksei holds no regret; this is his job. But for the person in front of him?

"You are taking this well. As expected of the Viscount of Nishiooji."

Chizuru’s pen twitches. “Am I? I’m surprised they still want to hear my opinion.” He casts his sight down. “They will educate the new heir without me; my words won’t matter."

That would be the most sensible thing to do, more efficient on their resource.

“In hindsight, wasn’t this my own fault?” Chizuru continues, “It wasn’t that I didn’t want a successor; I didn’t want one for politics. If I wasn’t so stubborn, I would have been able to raise someone with my own philosophy.”

“So you do regret something,” comments Aleksei,“I’m guessing this is why they call you the Rueful Ex-Diplomat.”

Chizuru lets out a soft chuckle. “I have many regrets, that much is true. It’s an unusual custom, isn’t it? That pseudonym thing.”

“Yes, it was unheard of before the Fall. It surely adds character, in my opinion.”

And that was the last of the document. Chizuru takes a bite of his Sachertorte slice, the gift from his guest.

“Delicious….” He says, savoring the sweet chocolate taste. “So, are you living in Vienna now? I enjoyed my stay there. The coffeehouses have lovely menu.” His voice now has a relaxed, melodic tone to it.

Hearing such relaxed tone, a sense of relief lulls Aleksei as well. “That is so.”

“I see. Maybe I should get a messenger bat then, or a raven. I would like to keep in contact with you.”

“Bats are pretty common in Vienna. I have heard they are sturdier than they look.”

“They really are, it surprised me! Nothing like the bats in the Empire.” Chizuru laughs.

Ah. He can laugh so freely right after going through something he dislikes. The hollowed eye socket must be still hurting too. Despite this, he still looks and sounds so charming.

The conversation continues carelessly as they talk about trite topics; the food, the weather, the people. Cities above and cities below.

Aleksei has observed the Nishioojis for several years, yet something about the young family head has always fascinated him. The way he wears his masks is alike yet different from the rest of his family or how spies like Aleksei use them. Before he realized, they have become close.

“You should come visit again when they have festivities going on. London’s festivals are nothing like anything on the Surface!” Chizuru says. His slice of Sachertorte is now halfway eaten.

“Yes, sir! I can’t wait for them too.”

“The Feast of the Exceptional Rose just passed recently. Honestly, it was lonely enjoying it all on my own.” He chuckles. His gaze softens, reflected on the surface of his tea.

Yes, they were close once, until the death of Nagato Konoe brought everything to an abrupt halt. Chizuru's eyes have always looked sad, but since that day, there is an emptiness in his remaining eye.

“I have heard of the Feast before. Strange, grotesque gifts with many messages. I think Konoe would have loved it,” says Aleksei. It was obvious to him what the Ex-Diplomat’s gaze meant.

“Right? He loved those things.” See? Bingo.

“Yes, so I think he would be happy to know you enjoying it as well.”

Huh? What was that familiar feeling? As if he was pricked by a pin out of nowhere.

A big spider scutters across the wall, its tiny steps audible in the silence. The smile on Chizuru’s face fades for a moment before returning in full. “Are you trying to cheer me up? How very nice of you.”

“I can’t afford to have you die of sadness on me now, after getting me relocated all the way to Vienna and this city.” Aleksei sips his tea, watching the man before him. Calm down, don’t lose sight of your purpose now.

Chizuru, meanwhile, only laughed. “Aw, I thought you liked this place. You were so enthusiastic when I met you.”

“Not enough to move in to it. The food is terrible.” And that was a mask, obviously; is Chizuru messing with him?

“Ah, well. No helping that.”

Aleksei continues observing Chizuru from behind his cup of tea. Perhaps now is the time to ask him about business again. Chizuru tilts his head, as if expecting it too. He places the cup of tea and its plate back on the table between them, then asks, “We agreed that we won’t force you back to the Surface before you finish your business, but what about after?”

“I don’t know.” Chizuru shrugs lightly. “Will you? I don’t even know if I will still be alive and strong when I find the chance to enact my plan.”

Aleksei shakes his head. “Unless there is further order from above, I will support you and your decision, whatever it will be. We are friends, aren’t we? And Konoe was my friend, too. Please do what you feel is right to honor his memory, as the person closest to him.”

Hearing that, Chizuru gives him one of his gentle, resigned smiles. “Thank you, Aleksei.”

Aleksei doesn’t like to admit it, but he and Konoe shared something in common: that they were worried about Chizuru, for spreading himself too thin. It feels heavy to admit it. Perhaps his death hit Aleksei harder than he thought.

Chizuru’s act of rebellion was selfishness, but truth be told, Aleksei was glad for it. Chizuru now is prioritising his own wishes instead of merely trying to please the whims of his family. Yes, it may feel odd to see the emptiness in Chizuru’s eye, but Aleksei can’t help but feel fascinated by the current Chizuru too. Will that emptiness be filled? What kind of person will he be then? Aleksei wants to see that, not as a pawn, but as a person who treasures someone dear.

He hopes he will be able to see that.

“I did hear that if we live long enough here then sunlight will become lethal… will you support me too then?”

“Please don’t joke about that. It was bad enough that you took out your own eye.”

#chizuru nishiooji #aleksei guskov

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