16: Bread
Date: 7-31-2020 IDST
Snape: *in the corner at a makeshift desk, brewing a potion* *looks up from his work and scowls at Dukermin* Are you aware that the latent magical energy in your house is out of balance? It's a wonder that I was able to make that simple fertilizer for that plant you had. *has a bunch more plants waiting to be revived*
Dukermin: *shamelessly looking over his shoulder as he works* Yeah I tried to do a feng shui thing a while back and completely screwed it up and haven't gotten around to fixing it. Maybe if I had real furniture instead of rocks it would be a little more spiritually aligned in here.
Snape: *makes some noise of acknowledgement and continues working* Where is that plant that I revived? Perhaps I could use it to know how to adjust my formula... *seems to be throwing things in the mix at random*
Dukermin: I'll get it, it's in the "dragon" den. *goes to fetch plant* Here he is! I named him Ziggy FYI.
Snape: ... This plant has legs.
Dukermin: yeah he actually ran away a while back, but he loved me so much he returned. Just last night actually! He brought his begonia girlfriend with him!
Snape: ...
Dukermin: Anywhooo... How are you liking Erscoga?
Snape: ... *hasn't left the house because it's the most similar thing to his dungeons that he's seen so far in his journeys with the Erscoga folks* *continues working*
Dukermin: You know, you should get out more. See our beautiful and very organized world! You could join a quidditch club! Or start a quidditch club!
Snape: I cannot imagine a world, even this one, in which I would start a quidditch club of all things, up there with the likes of James Potter.
Dukermin: It doesn't have to be a quidditch club, maybe a... culinary appreciation club? Or a.. idk cool cape club? What are you into?
Snape: *isn't going to bother answering* *scowls and jumps away as another cauldron explodes due to the magical energy in Dukermin's house* *cleans it up*
Dukermin: Yeah I gotta get that feng shui fixed. *helps clean it up*
Snape: *Evanesco-s the last remnants of the potion*
Dukermin: You have cleaning magics! That's so cool, you should start a cleaning club. I guess that's just a maid service but... like fun.
Snape: *glares at her* Do I look like a house elf to you?
Dukermin: No you look like a grumpy wizard man. I'm just trying to help... If you want to you can just chill here but like its damp and unaligned... Gotta get that sun vitamin you know...
Snape: *pointedly ignoring Dukermin as he rummages around in his pockets for more ingredients, coming up short* *frowns* Perhaps it would be prudent to gather more wormwood.
Dukermin: Is that a thing you dig out of the ground? I have a shovel! *excitedly runs to grab a shovel* Maybe Nalitie wants to help us find herbs!
Snape: *isn't going to mention that she doesn't really need the shovel, instead sheathing the dagger from his table and pocketing it* Is she the one who launched herself off of the school roof before you brought me here? *also has some vague feeling from another story in another life*
Dukermin: Yeah probably, sounds about right. Let's go! *off to Nalitie's house*
Snape: *following, because he'd have no idea where he's going otherwise*
Nalitie: *inside her house, reading to Lisa, Leonarda, and Erscoga Tobias*
Dukermin: *knocks on door with shovel, it's one of those plastic beach shovels*
Snape: *feeling uncomfortable being out in broad daylight, because he's spent the last 16 years working in the shadows and also being a spy, kind of, not consecutively*
Christine: *opens door, AE Tobias on her hip* Oh! Hello, Dukermin!
Dukermin: Hey everyone! We're gonna go find some wormwood, anyone wanna join?
Nalitie: *finishes the page she's on* .... Wormwood....?
Christine: I'm afraid I have rehearsal later this afternoon; I don't want to risk missing it, or I would come with you.
Nalitie: *setting down the book and picking up all three babies somehow* I'll come with you! Lemme just drop these guys off at Hope's house over on Aeuton, first.
Dukermin: Alrighty!
Snape: *impatient and wants to be doing this alone, but has no idea where to even find an environment suitable to grow wormwood, or if wormwood exists in Erscoga*
Dukermin: *to Snape* So uh yeah this is nalitie's house. Anyway, we'll probably go to Bensel to find wormwood.
Nalitie: *wants to wave, but is carrying three children simultaneously* Hello again! That other lady was my housemate, Christine.
Dukermin: Wanna lunchbox to Aeuton? *preps lunchbox*
Snape: Lunchbox?
Dukermin: Yeah it's the most common form of planet-to-planet travel in Erscoga.
Nalitie: It's.... Maybe like a portkey? Except you go into it, instead of just touching it.
Dukermin: Yeah, Nalitie, you should go first, just so Snape can see what's up.
Nalitie: *goes into lunchbox headfirst, clumsily with her extra load*
Dukermin: Yeah so you just do that but more gracefully *motions for Snape to jump in*
Snape: ... *copies Nalitie, minus the babies*
Dukermin: *hops in after*
Nalitie: *moves out of the way as they come through* *gestures around to the town of Sugar Bunting, which is visible from the hill they're on* Welcome to Aeuton! It used to be its own small world/country maybe? That we upended and rolled into a ball, and now it's here!
Dukermin: Yeah the people here are really chill with it tho.
Nalitie: Well, uh, they are now.
Snape: *a tad disoriented from the portal travel, but probably not as much as other newcomers and definitely not as much as when they were travelling via music*
Nalitie: Anyway, Hope's house is just down here, by Vella and her family. *starts walking, surprisingly normal*
Dukermin: *rolls down the hill*
Snape: *perturbed, but retaining the appearance of apathy* *walks down the hill as well, feeling slightly out of place because Aeuton is very colorful, not magical, and still a lot nicer than his hometown*
Dukermin: *shouts hello to people as she rolls by them*
Nalitie: *reaches Hope's door and kicks at it because her hands are full* *not bursting into the house like she normally would, for fear of giving the babies concussions*
Snape: *standing awkwardly behind her*
Dukermin: *rolled into some bushes and is now freeing herself* Are we here?
Nalitie: *nods back at her*
Hope: *opens the door* Nalitie. *sees Dukermin on the ground and Snape standing there looking like a bat* *confused*
Dukermin: *jumps up* Oh hey, I was just inspecting your bushes for routine maintenance... You got an A+ tho!
Hope: That's... nice.
Nalitie: Christine and I were wondering if you could babysit for a bit? She's got rehearsal later on and will probably be bringing the other Tobias, cause Steven is visiting his mom, Willy's out at a business conference--something about food safety standards, I guess--and Dave was going to go argue with his grandma's landlord.
Hope: I would love to take the kids. *takes the two that are not in the carrier and gestures for Nalitie to bring Tobias in the other room*
Shay and Rocky: *at the table, rewiring a Hexipal*
Dukermin: * goes over there* What are you trying to make it do?
Rocky: We wanna program it to do a different dance, one we saw someone doing over on Termata!
Dukermin: Oh I think I know the one you're talking about, it's quite popular over there. Try connecting that one to that one *somehow knows about electronics*
Rocky: *attempts it*
Hexipal: *starts waving its arms around in the air wildly, clicking its tiny heels together*
Snape: *has come into the house finally* *frowns* What is that?
Dukermin: It's called "The Man on Fire".
Nalitie: No doubt originating from one of my many VR house fires.... Those miniseries episodes got pretty popular on AETV, you know?
Dukermin: Yeah apparently they're renewing it for an eighth season!
Nalitie: Oh no, wait--I don't have any material planned! What the heck has Mettaton been doing with my VR room since he got his body back...? I was wondering where my small cult following came from.
Snape: *uncomfortable at the wording and hopelessly confused, because this is not just normal Muggle television being discussed, and it also isn't 1996 anymore*
Dukermin: Anywhoo... we're gonna head out to Bensel. Hope, do you guys need anything from there?
Hope: No, we just bought produce from Isole the other day, but thank you.
Dukermin: Alrighty, well, shall we? *starts heading out*
Nalitie: Heck yeah! *follows*
Snape: *nods at Hope and Shay and Rocky in goodbye* *leaves with them*
Dukermin: *preps lunchbox*
(And so they were off to Bensel!)
Dukermin: *appears there* So uhh... who's farm should we roll up to?
Nalitie: *lands on her face, untethered by children*
Snape: *lands rather ungracefully this time*
Nalitie: Definitely not Old McDonalds. He tried to sue me the other day for disturbing his corn at Christmas. I might be queen, but that doesn't mean I have money... or that Erscoga itself has a currency...
Dukermin: I mean if anyone's going to have weird herbs it'll be 7even but I'm not sure she's home right now...
Nalitie: *shrigs* Worth a shot. Otherwise we can raid the land around her house, I'm sure that's fine. We made the planet.
Dukermin: Yeah we can do a steal.
Snape: *squints suspiciously* What precisely do you mean, made this planet?
Dukermin: I mean, we kinda made all of this. You didn't know that? I mean, who in their right mind would just allow us to be queens if we didn't contribute drastically to the universe...?
Snape: Forgive me my ignorance, but I didn't exactly choose to come to your world, now did I? *won't speak of the fact that he has actively chosen to not leave the house in the last 2-3 months*
Dukermin: Oh yeah I forgot that you're kind of a hermit in my house. It's okay tho, you're helping my poor plants.
Nalitie: It's not like we really gave you a tour before now, anyway. Dang. Usually we're so on top of that when new people come to Erscoga.
Dukermin: Yeah. Welp. This is Bensel! The farm planet sorta thing!
Nalitie: Literally all that's on here is farms. And 7even's house, which might also be a farm. I'm not sure. We haven't gotten that far.
Dukermin: Idk she wants to be a witch doctor last I talked to her so...
Snape: *chooses not to comment on that wording, unsure if the distinction exists for the Wizarding World™*
Nalitie: I think the last time we did development for her was back last spring.
Dukermin: Well, if she doesn't have wormwood we can try Isole maybe...
Nalitie: Farmer Joe's pretty neutral. We might have to pay him, though.
Dukermin: I have some Pocket Lint™ that I can pay him with.
Nalitie: Sounds good.
Snape: *offers Dukermin a largish gold coin* This should be worth something, regardless of world. In any case, most Muggles are particularly transfixed with gold at all times, so unless your world is any different, it won't matter that this currency is invalid here.
Dukermin: Well... we can try it but.. One of our planets is... hard to explain. Gems and precious metals aren't nearly as rare here as they might be elsewhere. You know what is rare... French breads.
Nalitie: Dang. Maybe I should be selling bread to make some actual money. *pauses* No. That would ruin my integrity. I hate bread.
Snape: ...
Dukermin: *considers bringing up that toast is even rarer but decides against it* We can try it tho, the barter system is good.
Nalitie: *considering* *turns to Snape* Hey, you're good at making things. Would it be possible to make... breadless bread, for those who are intolerant to the real stuff?
Snape: *scowls* Are you truly that stupid?
Dukermin: I dont know. Maybe just throw some beans and rice in there...
Nalitie: Maybe without the yeast....
Dukermin: yeah! Snape, can you magically make bread rise??
Snape: I suppose you could use the Bread Leavening Charm, if you want to run your kitchen like a middle-aged wizarding housewife *thinking of Molly*. *looks at Nalitie* Although I don't suppose you would possess the magical skill required for even that.
Dukermin: Yeah so I'm learning that and making a bread company for sure. And it will be named Breadless Bread™ .
Nalitie: My kitchen is blissfully void of snails right now. Maybe once we're done here, we can go test that Bread Leavening Charm.
Dukermin: Yeah let's do it! ANYWAy wormwood.
(You've been standing in 7even's front yard for a while now. She's not home, but she has some bushes around her house that look suspiciously wormwood-like, and her herb garden is watering itself around the side of the house.)
Dukermin: Hey is that wormwood? *wields shovel and heads over there, tip-toeing, ready to do a steal*
Snape: *strides over there, plucking the shovel from Dukermin's hands on the way* If you dig up that plant, not only will it be more obvious to the homeowner, but you run the risk of severing the roots as well.
Dukermin: Dang maybe I just wanted to look cool, I had a whole aesthetic going on... *pouts*
Snape: *methodically cutting a few sprigs of wormwood, trying to make it not look obvious that any is missing* *placing them in handkerchiefs and placing them delicately in his robe pockets*
Dukermin: I'm lookout *pulls out a pair of binoculars*
Nalitie: *checking out her herb garden*
Snape: *notices another interesting plant and goes and takes some cuttings*
Dukermin: Ooh what did you find *uses binoculars to examine the new plant*
Snape: Dittany. I've been running low, no thanks to escapades of Potter and his friends last year. *scowling at the memory*
Dukermin: *fake low voice* If it wasn't for those meddling kids, bleh bleh bleh. *back to normal* But yeah you can probably take whatever you need, i'll leave some pocket lint as payment when we leave.
Nalitie: Plus, you have, like, unlimited time to do whatever you want here, there's no Voldemort or Harry Potter here!
Snape: *hisses* Don't say his name in my presence.
Dukermin: Ah... good ol' Voldy. Don't worry, if we ever were to encounter him we'd toss him on the scary prison planet. Plus, all his really scary magics are banned here anyways.
Snape: Hmph. Well, if you're done blithely insulting one of the two most powerful wizards of our age, I have what I came here for. Perhaps it would be better to offer your friend actual monetary compensation, if you wish to leave any trace of our presence at all.
Dukermin: Whatever you say, Dad. *leaves the gold coin* We should go do something productive with you since you're around. Maybe we should go see Alphys?
Nalitie: Oh! Yeah, since we're doing the tour for you kind of now, we should FIGHT you to see what your SOUL's like!
Snape: Excuse me?
Dukermin: We'll do that on Pluto. *prepares lunchbox* *hops in*
Nalitie: *tries feet-first this time*
Snape: *carefully enters lunchbox*
Dukermin: *somersaults onto Pluto* What's up everybody!??
(Pluto is looking a tad better than when you were here before. The barricades around the Best Western have been taken down. Undyne's house is pretty much rebuilt. Sans and Papyrus have started to rebuild their house. Alphys's lab is STILL buried in the ground. Chara and Sans eye you warily from their box.)
Dukermin: *shouts to the few monsters out and about* I love what you've done with the place!
Gert: IT'S YOU!!! THANK YOU FOR SAVING OUR PLANET!!! YOUR FRIEND LOOKS REALLY MAD AND ALSO KIND OF COOL! I LIKE HIS HAIR! MOM WON'T LET ME GROW MINE OUT BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE ANY.
Dukermin: You're welcome, my guy! And you know what, bald is beautiful!
Snape: *glaring intensely at Gert because he is a child and also he has never seen a monster child before??? But this one is getting on his nerves for sure.*
Dukermin: Gert, meet Snape. Snape, meet Gert!
Gert: WOAH!! I'VE NEVER MET A SNAPE BEFORE! THAT'S AWESOME!
Snape: *wishing he was back at his makeshift work station in Dukermin's house* What precisely did we come here for?
Dukermin: Uh lots of things actually. We needed to check up after the war and tragedy and stuff, we need to FIGHT you, we need to see Alphys... and I feel like there's something else that maybe we're not supposed to know about yet...
Nalitie: Yep. Sounds about right. *to Dukermin* Shall we start a FIGHT?
Dukermin: Sure thing! *to Snape* Put up your dukes, old man!
Nalitie: *starts the encounter*
(You're in the alternate dialogue now!)
(Snape stands across from you. You don't see his SOUL anywhere, but he's outlined in faint shades of purple and cyan.)
(You see the bullet box with Dukermin's multicolored SOUL and Nalitie's slightly desaturated blue one. It's Snape's turn.)
(He doesn't know what he's doing.)
Dukermin: Oh interesting, you don't have like a normal SOUL, which makes sense. The colors are definitely there tho.
Nalitie: Yeah, that's weird. If I didn't know better I would probably say you didn't have a SOUL, but that would be silly.
(Snape asks what you mean by "doesn't have a normal SOUL.")
Dukermin: So, you can see that we both have SOULs...
(Dukermin points out the two SOULs)
Dukermin: They're like, little heart things. I've got a bunch of random colors because... weird things...
Nalitie: And mine's not very heavily colored because DETERMINATION. Actually, neither of us is a very good example for what a SOUL is supposed to look like. Anyway, it's your turn, Snape. Just pick a button.
(Snape CHECKs Dukermin.
Dukermin - LV2 - She has a lot of SOULs because Candle Grandma is also inhabiting her body.)
(It's your turn!:
*| Fight
*| Act
*| Item
*| Mercy)
(Dukermin CHECKs Snape)
(Severus Snape - LV 6 - He's a wizard with specialties in potions and Dark magic.)
(Nalitie SPAREs Snape.)
(Snape accepts the spare, and dialogue goes back to normal.)
(Meanwhile, on Bensel)
*7even comes back to her house after looking for her lost frog pet and sees a golden coin. After searching around her house, she realizes there are some herbs missing. She wonders where they possibly could have gone, and decides to try and contact Nalitie to ask, as she is still relatively new to life in Erscoga.
*Ring ring*
(Somewhere back on Pluto...)
Nalitie: *jumps when she realizes her phone is ringing* *to Snape and Dukermin* Hang on a sec, this looks important. *answers phone* Hello?
7even, still on Bensel: Hello, I'm so sorry to disturb you, but I was wondering if there are any thiefs or something on Bensel, as far as I know is only me and my neighbor?
Nalitie: .... *suspiciously* Uh Old McDonald is a pretty shifty character if I do say so myself. He sued me a few weeks ago for trespassing in his corn.
7even: Potentially, my only suspicion of that is that he is, in fact, very territorial, and seems to respect other people's property as long--is someone there?
Dukermin: *viciously mouthing to Nalitie* Who's on the phone??
Nalitie: *covering the... the microphone bit?* 7even. I think we've been caught. *to 7even* Uhhh we're... orienting a newcomer to Erscoga. We're on Pluto, so there's a lot of post-war construction.
Dukermin: *loudly whispering* ask her if she wants to join us!
7even: Newcomer! Oh that's wonderful!
Nalitie: Yeah! His name is Snape--or uh that's his last name, we don't believe in first names here apparently--and we've been showing him the ropes over on Pluto if you want to come join us. I think I left you with a Lunchbox?
7even: Yes I still have that. And I would love to. I need to replenish my supplies anyway, and the coinage is the perfect amount to supply most of them.
Nalitie: Awesome! We'll wait here for you and also move out of the drop zone. *not going to mention the coin because it totally wasn't her and Dukermin who left it there*
*7even finds the lunchbox in her storage, pushes the pluto button, and jumps in. She tries a little flip to be cool, but unfortunately does not land it well, and falls next to Nalitie, Dukermin, and Snape.*
Dukermin: 7even! Cool "flip"
Nalitie: :D IT'S YOu!
Snape: *raises an eyebrow at the person at his feet*
7even: You must be the newcomer, welcome! Im 7even!! *extends hand as she brushes off dirt on pants*
Dukermin: Yeah that's Snape. He lives in my house and never leaves so we forced him to go outside.
Snape: *warily shakes hands with 7even* You say that as if I'm a hermit. I simply had better things to do than "explore" your world.
7even: *to Dukerman* a bit cautious is he? *to snape* That's probably a good thing in some situations! But I promise I won't do anything bad.
Dukermin: *nods to first bit*
Snape: ...
Nalitie: Uh anyway, yeah, this is our new guy, and we were just trying to analyze his SOUL because that's important here and he's weird.
Dukermin: We already did the fighting thing... What more do we need to do with that? Visit Alphys?
Nalitie: Yeah probably. We can go see if she's in her lab.
(Nalitie points at the big rectangular building that's half-buried in the ground.)
7even: while we are there, do you know, by chance, if she has any herb supplies. There is a specific plant that I need for luring purposes.
Dukermin: What plant? What are you luring?
7even: Well you see, from my exploration of Bensel, there is an elusive....animal? I've been tracking it and it seems to respond to a supply of a plant called Grotsel. And Ive, unfortunately run out. It's a bit hard to find.
Dukermin: We can definitely ask, if Alphys doesn't have any...
Snape: *mouths under his breath* What the hell is Grotsel...?
Dukermin: *looks to 7even* uhh...
7even: It's a new subspecies of herb I've found that resides in unknown places. I don't mean to sound suspicious, but there is very little known about it. I feel like the animal may hold some answers.
Dukermin: I mean it doesn't get much more unknown than Erscoga. Yeah we'll ask, herbs aren't alphys's expertise but she may know of someone.
Snape: *suddenly realizing the extent to which this world is different than his, and also how weird it is*
7even: Then off we go!!
*to the lab!*
Dukermin: *sees the door is like perpendicular and finds a big hole in the side of the building* uhh. Knock knock?
Alphys: *had been watching anime or something* *almost doesn't scream this time* *looks over? Back? At Dukermin + co.* O-oh! Hello!
7even: Hello. You must be Alphys. We haven't met yet. Im 7even.
Alphys: *looks over at 7even* A-alphys. *sees Snape kind of outside of the hole* O-oh... did you bring another, um, another whole s-society here again...?
Dukermin: Not a /whole/ society. Just one person as far as I know... This is Snape.
Snape: *hiding under his mask of apathy again because what the heck is going on*
Alphys: Oh! S-sorry, I just, uh, assumed b-because there were two of them...
7even: Well, I don't exactly know fully our business here, but it seems we have another SOUL for you to inspect? *Looks to Nalitie and Dukermin*
Dukermin: OH yeah, a couple of things apparently. First off... This guy *gestures to Snape* has kind of an interesting SOUL, and maybe you want to take a look?
Alphys: O-oh, sure? Um, what kind of, uh, w-weird should I expect?
Dukermin: Well, the SOUL is present, but it's not so much... a SOUL as like... an Aura? Idk you'll see...
Alphys: ???? *starts an encounter with Snape*
(You encountered Snape!
|* FIGHT
|* ACT
|* ITEM
|* MERCY)
(Alphys CHECKs Snape.)
(Severus Snape - LV 6 - He's a real, live wizard.)
(Snape SPAREs Alphys and the encounter ends.)
Alphys: !!!!!! W-Wait. You guys didn't tell me he was a-a wizard! L-like, uh, l-like a real one!!!!
Dukermin: Oh yeah he's definitely that. Cool, right?
7even: Fascinating. *To Snape* After this is over, I have a couple of questions to inquire of you, if that's all right?
Snape: *looks at 7even appraisingly* If they are not too obnoxiously intrusive, I suppose.
Alphys: *to Dukermin* N-no, y-you guys don't get it. Wizards, real, true wizards w-went extinct in my world when The Barrier was created.
Snape: !!
Dukermin: Oh. Welp. Now you get to meet one! It's okay, he's kinda chill.
7even: Also a bit cautious haha.
Alphys: B-but that would explain the SOUL t-thing. Wizards, uh, they're kind of b-between monsters and humans??? I-I mean, obviously they're human, b-but they're special b-because their SOUL and their, uh, magic... Um, instead of manifesting as a--as a separate entity of sorts? The SOUL you're all used to? It, uh, it's interwoven into their body, their blood, their DNA. It's, uh, actually really interesting! A-and that's why they need incantations and wands, b-because physical matter--namely the human body--is a r-really bad conductor for, uh, magic.
7even: What, potentially, would happen if a regular human tried to conduct magic like that?
Alphys: Um... like, do you mean using w-wands and stuff? Nothing would, uh, happen really. Regular humans... their S-SOULs are separate enough from their, uh, physical matter that it's p-possible to pour magic out directly from the SOUL, so to speak, like, uh, like monsters but a little weaker, b-because they're impeded by being a human. That's why S-SOUL magics, l-like you use in encounters, aren't really effective for humans like they are for monsters.
7even: Amazing! I'll definitely have to do some research on this topic at some point.
Dukermin: I guess that kinda explains why it's so difficult to place "spellcasting" into the power cap. Because it encompasses so many things and hasn't really been much a part of our world before...
Alphys: Y-yep! Oh, uh, and also, in the case of, uh, wizards, s-some of their spells don't fit into the Spectrum of Magical Chroma. N-not like the kinds of magic you and Nalitie and, uh, 7even, was it? can use. L-like, uh... the cosmic p-powers you used to use, Dukermin? T-those were s-sometimes similar to regular monster magic or a v-very watered down blue magic. B-but I know there's some kinds of m-magic wizards can use, certain s-spells that go beyond the S-SOUL or r-really even anything we've slotted into E-Erscoga's system.
Dukermin: That's really cool... But... So we wanted to start a bread company right, and the only way that it can be done with integrity is if we find a way to remove the yeast component. Is it possible for us to learn spells? Or would it look a little different for us? This is very important.
Alphys: U-uh... Well, er... y-you wouldn't get anywhere just, um, just copying Snape if he does a spell. Um... I guess it would depend on the spell??? Maybe if, uh, if you showed it to us we could see if it has a color? *mutters* Sans is better at Color Theory than I am...
Dukermin: It's a bread leavening charm? Snape, can you show it to us?
Snape: *raises eyebrow* ... I could, if there was actual bread dough in front of me. What do you expect me to do, leaven your friend? It wouldn't work, by the way.
7even: I'm so sorry to interrupt. But why do we have to remove the yeast?
Nalitie: *bursts in through the crowd, blazing with passion* French bread is valuable and I don't have any money, but I can't just make and sell bread! I hate bread, it would ruin my moral code! But Log_Lady tested it for me and decided that yeast specifically is what makes bread bread, and gives it its flavor and stuff, so if you remove the yeast, you have breadless bread. *to Snape* And no, its not a stupid idea!
Dukermin: But bread simply isn't good if it isn't fluffy. *under breath* this actually sounds kind of like a scam but... i mean there are lab grown diamonds so...
7even: Ah, I see. Well I have a few bread ingredients at my home, but unfortunately not the type for french bread, so I am not of much help. The only ingredients I have is a starter for sourdough *to Dukermin* Lab grown diamonds? Cool!
Dukermin: Yeah it's an Earth thing! But i mean if there's no yeast in the starter, that could be useful. We just need to test it...
7even: I'm not sure if it has yeast. Farmer McDonald left it on my doorstep as payment for some seeds I lent him
Nalitie: *hisses at the mention of Old McDonald*
Dukermin: Oh, you know who would definitely have basic ingredients? Toriel. We can all just pop over there and see if we can use her kitchen.
Nalitie: HEck yeah, that's right! *already pushing past the crowd again to the outside world*
7even: One thing before we leave. *to Alphys* I have been trying to gather some information on a plant called Grotsel, but am having some trouble. Do you happen to know where I would find some information on it? Perhaps a book or something?
Alphys: *frowns* U-um... I don't think I've e-ever heard of it, b-but maybe on one of the native planets s-someone might know? N-no one's really sure what's on, uh, Lux or D-dunkel yet? O-or the war planet...
7even: That's all right. And thank you for the tips! Let's head out to...Toriel, you said?
(To Toriel's house!)
Toriel: *outside, searching for snails and humming*
Asgore: *probably still living in his own house, since his therapy with Sophia was cancelled temporarily due to the war*
Dukermin: *waves* What's up, Toriel? *looks for snails as well*
Toriel: Oh! Hello, my child--*sees the rest of the group*--children!
Snape: *narrows his eyes at Toriel, because he's not a child and she's too much like Molly Weasley for his liking*
Dukermin: Oh, this is 7even and that cranky man there is Snape!
7even: *Waves with large smile, she seems to like that same characteristic Snape dislikes so much*
Toriel: It is very nice to meet you both! If Asgore were here, he would offer you tea, but seeing as he is not here, perhaps I could extend that offer instead?
Dukermin: Oh yeah! *heads inside* *stops and knocks on the door before just walking in*
Snape: *despite everything, is always down for tea*
Toriel: *to Dukermin* It is open, my child. Asgore is back in the castle right now.
Dukermin: Eh, habits *walks in*
7even: *follows, as she follows, she looks excitedly around at the house, loving the cozy aura of her surroundings*
Toriel: *follows them in, leaving the basket of snails on the counter and washing her hands*
Nalitie: *sits down at the table*
Snape: *standing there in the kitchen, feeling hopelessly out of place*
Dukermin: *had found two snails in the garden* *has named them Seth and Sarah and will be keeping them forever now*
Toriel: *preparing tea* *to Dukermin* Thank you again for helping us with the war, my child. It was certainly a Plutonian problem, but we appreciate the knowledge you brought to the table.
Dukermin: Oh no problem! *under breath* kinda feel responsible because it was my body that was used to... whatever what's done is done. *To 7even* So I have a super powerful SOUL kinda sharing my body... it's complicated but yeah she went on a vacation gone wrong...
7even: That sounds awful. I hope you are okay now.
Dukermin: Oh yeah it was fine, apparently it was a very fun time until they accidentally brought a super evil lady to Pluto...
7even: Yikes, sounds like a lot of stuff happens on Pluto. I'll stick to my home base haha
Dukermin: This is true.. Yeah Bensel is much more peaceful. Anywho...
Nalitie: Oh yeah! Hey Toriel, you have baking ingredients, right? We want to make bread.
Toriel: Oh! Of course, my child, although I must warn you that I have run out of yeast. I made bread for Asgore and Frisk before the war and did not have the chance to buy more.
Dukermin: Oh well what luck! We're hoping to make bread that doesn't contain yeast but is still light and fluffy! With wizard magics!
Toriel: *startles, nearly dropping the tea cups she was serving* Wizard, did you say?
Dukermin: Yeah it's a whole thing. Don't worry about it tho.
Toriel: Apologies, my child, but I did not realize wizards were common in your world--they went out of existence in the War of Humans and Monsters in ours. I suppose we have not explored this world very much since coming here...
Dukermin: I wouldn't say they're common... there's really just one...
Nalitie: *points somewhat accusingly at Snape*
Snape: *scowls*
Toriel: *gently admonishing her* It is rude to point, my child.
Nalitie: *stops and mutters* Sorry Toriel...
Dukermin: heading over to the baking supplies* So uh, that's a yes on borrwing your kitchen...?
Toriel: Of course, my child, after all it would be remiss of me to deny you permission when I use Nalitie's kitchen so often.
7even: And of course we can reimburse you for the ingredients used. I have a coin :D
Dukermin: Oh good, cuz I'm fresh out of Pocket Lint ™ .
7even: *looks confused for a second* Pocket lint....hm. Weird. I think I have some, don't know where I got it
Nalitie: Remember, Erscoga doesn't have a currency yet... Pocket Lint ™ is temporary until our bread economy takes off. *pulling out the flour and putting some warm water in a bowl with sugar, but no yeast*
7even: Oh, well if there is no need for currency, I will find a different use for this coinage.
Snape: *over in the corner, sipping his tea and trying not to draw attention*
Nalitie: *also pulling out measuring cups* Sounds good. We've got like a lot of different currencies on each planet that are literally worthless in the grand scheme of Erscoga.
Dukermin: Ooh can I mix?
Nalitie: *pouring flour into her bowl of water* Heck yeah. I've got a spatula for while its still liquid but we'll have to knead it eventually.
7even: *intently watching* I actually don't know how to make bread. I was going to learn with my starter, but this is good too.
Dukermin: Sweet! You can try kneading it then, we'll show you how.
Nalitie: *sprinkling salt into the mixture because she forgot that* *blithely adding random measurements of flour, going by appearance rather than recipe* You guys can go ahead and mix or knead or whatever, I'll add as we go.
Dukermin: *mixes it up*
Nalitie: *pouring flour over Dukermin's hands as she mixes* It's probably going to be good soon.
7even: When will we need that charm?
Dukermin: Before or after we knead it? *has never made bread before either*
Nalitie: Uhhhh *looks to Snape*
Snape: After, if I recall Molly Weasley's explanation correctly. *obviously does because he's Snape and remembering things correctly is an important character trait of his*
7even: Perfect. Is it time to knead it?
Nalitie: *nods enthusiastically and moves out of the way*
Toriel: *watching and smiling, sipping her tea* *slides over to make small talk with Snape*
7even: *starts to knead, a lot more violently than would be expected, but obviously having fun*
Dukermin: *starts doing the dishes because that's a nice thing to do*
Nalitie: *putting away the flour*
Snape: *trying to move away from Toriel without seeming obvious*
7even: Hey guys, I think it's ready!
Dukermin: Okay, I'll give Alphys a quick call and see if she's still available to check the color *ring ring*
Alphys: *answers* *is breathing heavy, like she's running* I-I'm sorry!!! I hadn't, uh, hadn't realized y-you guys left!!!! I'm on my way!!!!
Dukermin: Oh it's chill, see you in a bit! *hangs up* She's on the way!
7even: Wonderful! We need her to check it or something?
Dukermin: Yeah, precisely. To check the color and see how it works, ya know...
(There's a knock on the door. Toriel goes to answer it, and in runs Alphys)
Alphys: A-alphys is here! U-um, I mean, uh, I'm here! *takes out the device she uses to examine SOULs, which has been recalibrated to just look at Color Signatures* O-ok, go ahead and t-try it.
Snape: *walks over to the bread dough and pulls out his wand* Ortum panem! *the bread begins to rise, as it would if you let regular bread dough sit for a while*
Dukermin: Oh wow! It's working! I smell capitalism and wealth!
Snape: *frowns* Of course it's working, I'm not an incompetent first year.
Toriel: *unhappy at Snape's attitude, but too polite to correct him in front of company*
7even: This is wonderful. I'm sure they didn't mean it as an insult, more like a congratulations and a thank you.
Snape: Hmph.
(The bread has risen wonderfully, and is ready to be baked. Of course, we didn't shape it into loaves of french bread, so it will have to be baked as one big lump.)
Alphys: *messing with her device, pulling up the hex codes for any colors that might be there*
Dukermin: *puts bread into oven, which we definitely remembered to preheat*
(Soon, the smell of baking bread fills the kitchen.)
Alphys: O-okay, um... So the composition of the spell looks like it's a really similar color to, uh, Dukermins' old c-cosmic magic, but in, uh reverse. It l-looks like it's got s-some Integrity aspect, w-which is at a r-really low s-saturation, it says th-that aspect is #e0f1ff, b-but it's got a lot of k-kindness in it, s-similar to healing magic--#54ff68. S-so it's not wizard specific! But s-since you can't really c-cast the spell like Snape, you'd have to, uh, play around with b-base magic compositions and, uh, color mixing, and intent, and really S-Sans is better at t-this stuff than me...
Dukermin: Oh, we'll have to pay him a visit then, I guess? At some point for sure.
7even: Well you guys do that. I'm going to head back to my home to do a bit more research. Keep me updated on the bread. And thank you so much for bringing me along!
Nalitie: Definitely, we will start a... a bread empire, I guess. You can take the bread if it's done. Otherwise we'll mail it to ya.
7even: Sounds wonderful!! *7even takes out her lunchbox and presses the planet Bensel, waves goodbye, and decides to not flip into it* *disappears*
Dukermin: Goodbye! Let's get this bread!!
Nalitie: *waves goodbye until she's gone* *continues cleaning up Toriel's kitchen*
Dukermin: Okay, so we're gonna go talk to Sans then?
Nalitie: Yeah, I think so. *is writing down the hex codes for the colors, now that the kitchen is clean*
Dukermin: Cool, i feel like I've been standing here for months. Off we go! *drags Snape with*
(And so they went outside to the Callie/Sans box. Mr. Face Man stands outside of it, writing on his whiteboard. Callie is confused. Sans is less than enthused.)
Dukermin: *draws a cat on the whiteboard*
Mr. Face Man: *look of annoyance, as much as his face will allow, as it is stuck in one kind of default smile*
Dukermin: *also copies the hex code onto the whiteboard* We want to make bread.
Mr. Face Man: *writes in the corner* ✋︎ 🕈︎✌︎💧︎ ❄︎✌︎☹︎😐︎✋︎☠︎☝︎ ❄︎☟︎☜︎☼︎☜︎
Dukermin: This is more important though. Here's the hex code for the spell we're trying to learn. We need to avoid using yeast for personal reasons, so a bread-leavening charm is the only option. It's urgent.
Snape: *noise of disdain*
Dukermin: *noise of acknowledgment of disdain*
Sans: ... what exactly do you need our help with? or mine, i guess. i dunno. i just got up, i'm not bready for this yet.
Dukermin: Nice. We just want to be able to do this spell ourselves, we have the hex code so I guess we need to play around with the base colors some to get it to work.
Sans: *looking at the hex codes* ... hm. well, i guess this spell, or whatever you'd call it if it's not actually performed by a wizard, has a primary kindness trait. that's not too hard, just some regular ol' green attacks. the integrity part's a lot weaker, so you can't really throw my bro's blue attack at it and call it a day. if i was doin' it, i'd be able to mix the magics before i even throw the attack, but for you, it might be easier to have one person make the green attack and have the other person throw some good ol' blue magic at it. the SOUL kind, not the attack kind. oh, and you gotta mean it, too, that you're trying to get bread rise specifically.
Dukermin: So... I do have access to green magic, and you can do the blue magic thing... It'll just be a matter of getting the proportions right... right?
Sans: *finger guns* you got it, kiddo.
Nalitie: And getting more dough. Forgot that step. Also, we can only use those magics inside of an encounter so... does that mean we have to fight the bread?
Dukermin: Yes!! This is a dream come true!
Snape: *looking at them like they're crazy, since this magic system is gibberish to him*
Dukermin: So... back to Toriel's kitchen for a bread-making montage?
Nalitie: Back to Toriel's kitchen!
(and then they made a bunch of bread dough, knowing they were gonna screw it up a few times)
Dukermin: Okay, let's initiate a fight with loaf A.
(You encountered Loaf A!
|* FIGHT
|* ACT
|* ITEM
|* MERCY)
(Dukermin conjures a beam of magical energy and tries to hold it steady... but she lost control!!)
(Nalitie attempts to perform a blue SOUL mode on the beam of energy, missing a little and only getting some into the beam.)
(The bread turns invisible! It may have risen... but it's hard to eat bread when it's invisible...)
Dukermin: Maybe you should start this next one Nalitie.
(You won...? Earned 0 G and 0 EXP.)
Nalitie: Okay.
(You encountered Loaf 2!
|* FIGHT
|* ACT
|* ITEM
|* MERCY)
(Nalitie attempts to make solid blue magic.... But Integrity magic only manifests itself as a SOUL mode, which isn't physical.)
(Loaf 2 launches into the ceiling! -XX HP!)
Dukermin: Okay, so that didn't work. Probably be best if I started, huh...
(You won! Earned 5 G and 1 EXP!)
(You encountered Loaf e!
|* FIGHT
|* ACT
|* ITEM
|* MERCY)
(Dukermin manifested a ball of green magic and actually held it steady for a while!)
(Nalitie carefully turns the attack blue.)
(The bread starts to cry.)
(Dukermin SPAREs the bread)
(You won! Earned 0 G and 0 EXP.)
Snape: You two are actually more dunderheaded than the first years I teach. How such a simple charm can be outside your grasp is beyond me.
(You encountered Loaf △!
|* FIGHT
|* ACT
|* ITEM
|* MERCY)
(Dukermin very carefully makes a small bean of green magic)
(Nalitie attempts to turn the attack blue, but it's too small for the SOUL mode to take hold.)
(The flour in the bread begins to turn back into wheat. Now Toriel's countertop looks like a small farm.)
(You won? Earned 0 G and 0 EXP.)
Toriel: *walking into the kitchen* *didn't know they'd come back* Oh! What is this? It is, erm, a lovely addition to my home, but what on Earth are you doing?
Dukermin: We're trying.
(You encountered Loaf 5!
|* FIGHT
|* ACT
|* ITEM
|* MERCY)
(Dukermin does the green thing.)
(Nalitie sees the insurmountable amount of bread dough left, and accidentally leeches some Perseverance magic into her blue SOUL mode as she casts it.)
(The bread hardens into stone -- a wall of morality.)
Snape: *raises an eyebrow* How is it that you can manage so much accidental Transfiguration, but cannot perform a simple household charm?
Nalitie: We're doing our best, shh.
(You won, maybe. Earned 0 G and 0 EXP.)
(You encountered Loaf F'!
|* FIGHT
|* ACT
|* ITEM
|* MERCY)
(Dukermin flavor blasts the bread before Nalitie has a chance to realize what's going on)
(Nalitie pouts.)
(The bread comes to life. It goes to comfort the crying bread. What a nice moment.)
(You won! Earned 3 G and 0 EXP.)
(You encountered Loaf G(x)!
|* FIGHT
|* ACT
|* ITEM
|* MERCY)
(Dukermin is getting frustrated. She blasts the bread again.)
(Nalitie complains about not being able to do her thing. She catches the tail end of the blast with a blue SOUL mode.)
Loaf G(x): *is conscious* Space? Space space space gotta go to space. SPAAACE.
(Loaf G(x) has left the building.)
(You won! Earned 0 G and 0 EXP.)
Dukermin: Next time you can blast the heck out of it with me. It feels great!
(You encountered Loaf EIGHT!
|* FIGHT
|* ACT
|* ITEM
|* MERCY)
(Dukermin does the spiderman pose thing and decimates that bread with green magic)
(Nalitie casts a blue SOUL mode directly on the bread's remains.)
(Loaf EIGHT shatters and its molecules spiral apart, becoming pure magical energy and transcending our plane of existence)
Snape: *frowns* I would have liked to study that.
(You won? Earned 0 G, 0 EXP, and 15 Experience Points.)
Dukermin: Okay, time to chill out. I think I've got it figured out.
(You encountered Loaf !
|* FIGHT
|* ACT
|* ITEM
|* MERCY)
(Dukermin steadies herself and conjures up a reasonable looking green attack)
(Nalitie applies a blue SOUL mode to the attack, if a bit heavy-handedly.)
(The bread begins to rise! But... sideways?)
Nalitie: Dang. That was my fault, I think.
Dukermin: We'll get it next time.
(Loaf wins!)
(You encountered Loaf X!
|* FIGHT
|* ACT
|* ITEM
|* MERCY)
(Dukermin makes up a green attack and gets hit with a strange feeling... like she doesn't actually know what she's doing... like this is all a manifestation of something outside of her control...)
(Nalitie does... something.)
(The bread begins to glitch out. The world around it seems to tear apart and reveal a reality that none of the citizens of Erscoga are prepared to face.)
Loaf X: *takes in its surroundings* I believe it is time for me to leave this Google Doc now. *flies out of your computer screen, just over your left shoulder and out into the horizon*
Dukermin: ... That wasn't it.
Snape: *has the chilling feeling that he's nothing more than a crude pantomime of who he's supposed to be, and that he's not supposed to exist in Erscoga at all* *shudders*
(You encountered Loaf 11!
|* FIGHT
|* ACT
|* ITEM
|* MERCY)
(Dukermin makes a very similar green attack as the one she used on Loaf )
(Nalitie places a blue SOUL mode on the green attack. But calmly.)
(Loaf 11 begins to rise! The right way this time!!)
Nalitie: Heck yeah!!!!
Dukermin: We did it!
(You won!!!! Earned nothing but the satisfaction of finally getting bread to rise.)
(Dukermin leaves the fight)
Dukermin: So now we bake it, right?
Nalitie: *nods enthusiastically*
Toriel: *cleaning up some of the more interesting loaves and trying to coax the crying and other conscious ones outside*
Dukermin: *places bread in the oven we totally preheated*
(The bread bakes like a normal loaf of bread! The crying loaf cries harder, mourning its friend as it's so cruelly incinerated at 350 degrees.)
Oven: *dings*
The previous loaf of bread we forgot to take out of the oven: *is but a pile of ash*
Loaf 11: *is a perfectly healthy bread specimen*
Dukermin: Are you ready to try our magic bread that's gonna make us rich?
Nalitie: *peers at the bread suspiciously, reminding herself it's Breadless Bread* Indeed.
(The bread is delicious and fluffy in spite of a lack of yeast)
Loaf e: *sobs harder*
Dukermin: We should find a home for the Loaf e and Loaf F'.
Nalitie: *cleaning up the remains of the bread on the ceiling* I can take them for now, if you'd like. I'm sure the kids will get a kick out of them. Maybe Loaf F' will make a good babysitter.
Dukermin: That would be nice. *chucks the stone bread into the garden*
Nalitie: *tosses Loaf * *takes Loaves e and F'* Alrighty. Thank you again Toriel! *has forgotten about Loaf A sitting invisibly on the countertop*
Dukermin: Yeah, thanks! We'll make sure to cut you in for 15% of the profit.
Snape: *surreptitiously eating some of Loaf 11* *is more impressed than he'd ever admit*
Toriel: Oh, that is nice. Please feel free to come visit whenever you would like!
(The end! ... for now.)
~•*•~
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