#it's like “ok! they're all better now! it's like they aren't disabled at all!”

[bleakbluejay]

i'm so convinced that every writer for every big show or movie that has the main character have an amputation is not personally close with an amputee

with the exception of maybe forrest gump bc i thought lt. dan was very convincing and compelling

but like. they make getting and maintaining prosthetics look easy. they make it look not very painful (or the pain is super temporary). they don't bring up the emotional distress being an amputee can create, and if they bring up the ableism, it's a distasteful joke. all the negativity is done upon amputation and never beyond. and that's just so unrealistic i think. unless i, myself, am the world's most sensitive bitchy amputee.

#eli talks #ableism #the way amputees and prosthetics in media are treated... #it's like “ok! they're all better now! it's like they aren't disabled at all!” #and like while yes it's good to have amputee characters thriving... uh... #maybe that sucks if that's all you get to see too? #it might make abled people think that we're fine 100% of the time and don't need support #which is DEFINITELY my fucking experience #asoiaf in general has awesome disabled rep thank you grrm #i love lt. dan even if he's pathetic and sad and he has the “look im all better now” reveal at the end #he was written so realistically and i relate to him a lot #esp after losing my ability to use my prosthetic for 3 years #i think the skywalkers are *cool* rep but they really just like #lose their HANDS and then move on with their lives like nothing happened #as if that isn't a disconnection of how they can communicate and receive information from the world... #hershel from twd show was *cool* rep as well but like they just found a fucking leg hanging around??? #and it HAPPENED to be the right socket size and fit and height??? #idk i really could just be nitpicky. idk.

[phoenixcatch7]

Okay so I saw this post about dark percy (really him reaching his Limit and fighting full strength with everything he had) and I was imagining the potential fallout of that. Pretty bad, as you can guess.

The thing is a lot of percys strongest moments happen out of view of the olympians, especially in hoo. The hurricane atop the glacier in alaska, the poison scene in tartarus, bending the depression river and the one in the palace of nyx.

Stuff like the St Helens eruption got him washed up on an inescapable island literally removed from reality until calypso gave him the OK, the achillies curse he got tricked into losing by hera. Smaller moments, the minotaur, fighting ares, the stolen pirate ship, walking on water vs hyperion, freshwater sources, him knowing both Latin and Greek, they're more easily brushed off or at least mostly due to cunning, sword skills and sheer luck and grit.

But basically the olympians don't actually know the full extent of percys strength and divine power. They have hints - percy standing on the throne, winning against ares, his many victories - but what they aren't willing to brush aside in the heat of (an important) battle there have been pretty strong consequences for.

Heck, just look at Frank, he's no prodigy with weapons, he's polite and respectful, but his distant relation to two olympians letting him inherit shapeshifting earned him direct divine meddling and his life force tied to a hunk of half toasted firewood. Man is a honey bear with lactose intolerance and he was punished with a mythical death curse for being too strong.

If Percy's true strength came out, he would risk losing everything. His freedom, most certainly. If he wasn't straight up executed he might wind up in a Greek myth style imprisonment, the way of atlas, prometheus, calypso, or something like the myriad of ways Greek heroes met their end. Good scenario he survives a dozen curses and gets on with life with a dozen new disabilities, best case scenario he's stripped of every inch of divine power and dropped back to the mortal world, not even clear sighted. Total separation from the Greeks and Romans. Oh, annabeth would marry him either way, and his friends would hardly abandon him despite the gods wishes, but they'd hardly be able to see him, and no long range contact without the ability to IM him or vice versa.

All of that to say Percy is hiding his true strength from the gods themselves - maybe not consciously, and it's not even power he particularly wants - but if they ever find out?

It's game over.

But why is he so strong? I don't know. What I do know is that the half bloods of the books are so much stronger than the ones of myth. Used to be that divine blood would get you divine favour and a great fate whether you liked it or not. Maybe some cunning and bow skills. A spot of spell casting if you were really lucky. Achillies got his curse after he was born, Perseus had a dozen magic artifacts, orpheus had something going on but hercules is to my knowledge an outlier. Now? Everyone in camp has some special power. Flight, fire, necromancy, hypnotism, dream walking etc. However it's happening, half bloods are slowly but surely getting a lot, lot stronger every century that passes. Meta? I mean I guess. But.

What no one has done before is something that their godly parent couldn't.

Except.

Except Percy.

Except Percy, in tartarus, at his mental, emotional and physical limit, controlling poison with his mind, overpowering the goddess of poison in her home, making misery choke on misery. Feeling something in his chest crack. Doing something poseidon could not, and doing it better than the person who could.

Down there, hidden away from the gods, he evolved. For that brief moment, he did something, was something new.

And that was how the gods overthrew the titans.

And that's why they must never find out.

#In terms of extrapolating meta 'percy Jackson unknowingly being maybe the first of a new generation of increasingly powerful #Half bloods that would be in line with overthrowing the more powerful but complacent olympians as the next in the long line of toppling #Ancient and established lineages of divinity' has to be one of my favourites. Give it a few more centuries and they might actually be in #Danger lol #And the olympians would NOT be happy but would they solve the issue at its roots and stop having kids? Doubtful :) #Even just three of them who barely had anything to do with land or mortals couldn't keep it in their pants for more than half a century #Hestia and chiron remain the mvps as always lol #I got distracted from a story idea with lore dang it #pjo #pjo hoo toa #pjo series #pjo fandom #percy jackon and the olympians #heroes of olympus #percy jackson #Pjo dod #hoo series #pjo hoo #the heroes of olympus #perseus jackson #pjo meta

[newts-frogs-toads]

Things I hate about my fandoms

(I will probably make posts about each of them later going more in depth)

⚠️These DO NOT apply to ALL members of these fandoms⚠️

Cartoons:

Miraculous: mischaracterisation of Kagami as a bad person who just want to ruin the love square. But at the same time they love luka because he's just a sweet little baby boy 🥺👉👈

The owl house: Hunter and Ed interacted once and people started shipping them while they complain about Hunter and Willow for having a 1 year age gap. Also people acting like everyone is siblings

Amphibia: they care about the main trio too much to care about any other character at all

Gravity falls: where do i even start

Steven universe: The Su!c!de incident (dont worry she survived)

The ghost and molly mcgee: they hate Ollie for no reason even after his redemption arc for getting in the way of Molly x Libby or Andrea. They say he and molly look like siblings but their eye colors, skin colors and hair colors are different. (Tbh they cant take it when both characters in a pairing are Asian).

Dwampyverse: Too many NSFW art of children

Ducktales: I like them. Nothing bad about them other than they just ignore canon sometimes but hey, so do I.

Hilda: same as the Dwampyverse

Tangled: pretty chill but please dont ship Varian who's 16 with Cass who's 25.

Infinity train: Saying Lake, Ryan and Min aren't queer coded. Like are you blind? Its fine if you don't ship Rymin or use She/her for Lake but remember cartoon network Stopped the creator from putting those in.

Lego monkie kid: pretty ok fandom. Nothing bad to say about them.

She ra: im pretty late to this fandom so I haven't seen anything bad but as a DT megafan the fandom doesn't give them enough attention to them lol

Dead end: too small

Kipo: WAY too small

Live action movies:

Heathers: (see Musicals)

Dead poets society: ITS DYING WE NEED MORE FANWORKS

Games:

Undertale: the needle cookie incident (they're ok now don't worry. Dont take food from strangers kids)

Stardew Valley: Toxic arguing over the Bachelors and Bachelorettes. Acting like Haley and Alex are some irredeemable monsters. like, have you tried befriending them?

Musicals:

Heathers: Acting like Heather McNamara is some sweet little angel. Like no. She is sad and deserves better but that doesn't mean shes nice. (In other words: she is damaged, far to damaged, but that does not make her wise)

Hamilton: the HIV incident (just search Hamilton HIV to know the context). Also harassing anyone who isn't the OG cast.

Ride the cyclone: Acting like the characters are so pure and innocent. Like, im against NSFW of the kids too, but the whole point of Ricky is that hes not so sweet and innocent as a disabled person. Or the whole point of Noel is that he wants to be "fucked up". The tiktok fandom is also super biased to the original cast (meanwhile tumblr loves it)

Six: Saying Jane isn't a powerful woman because she wants to get married and have kids

#Miraculous #miraculous ladybug #kagami tsurugi #the owl house #hunter toh #hunter noceda #Huntlow #I love huntlow #Amphibia #sasha waybright #marcy wu #anne boonchuy #Gravity falls #steven universe #Tgamm #tgamm ollie #Tgamm mollie #molly x ollie #dwampyverse #phineas and ferb #Milo murphy's law #hamster and gretel #Ducktales #hilda the series #netflix hilda #hilda netflix #tangled the series #Tts #Tangled #Infinity train

[haridraws]

sorry to bother you, i saw your 2022 hourly comic post today and i first want to say thank you because it’s really my exact situation in so many ways, right down to being apart from my partner (haven’t gotten to see her since the start of the pandemic since we’re both disabled and public transport is a covid nightmare but we’re on the council housing waitlist so hopefully eventually!) and it means a lot to not feel alone in that. i wanted to ask about the mobility chair that helps you sit up if that’s okay? i have a simple bed setup but being able to sit in the living room with the sun and a view is nice, but i can’t sit up unsupported for long and i can’t really like Do Anything and also sit upright bc the sitting up is all my energy, so a chair like that might be something to save for if you could maybe tell me about it! also does it have support for the neck/head? i think my spine is getting compressed from not being able to sit up for so long lol but i might be able to find cushions for that so that’s less essential!

anyway, sorry to ramble on! no pressure if you can’t manage a reply, the fact that i know about such chairs now is helpful so thank you either way!! and probably very belated but i was scrolling your blog and happy to see you have a place with your partner, so congrats! take care and all the best to you both!

thank you for this message, v sorry you're in the same boat as I was. Answering properly and publicly in case this is useful for anyone else:

Stuff I personally use to make being bedbound more comfortable

obligatory disclaimer I am not a doctor, stretching or moving your body a little (see 18) if or when you can is probably good, etc.

1. SPECIAL FURNITURE The chair I have NOW is a "riser recliner" and I usually add a small pillow for lower back (and sometimes head) support. Like adjustable beds, they're whole furniture with powerful (HEAVY) motors built in, so they're expensive. They're usually cheaper:

if you don't need to be tipped out (just power recliners, though they might recline less or provide less support)

from regular shops, not mobility ones.

If you're able, you can go into a store and try one out first (personally being taken in a wheelchair was worth the strain, because it was weirdly hard to predict what back shape would be comfy).

if you're in the UK and you're 'chronically sick or disabled' you can get them VAT-free to make them 20% cheaper - mobility stores will have a form, others you might have to ask / check the shop does it

(I got one I could lie flat in, that came with a free setup service in the 'room of my choice'.)

It still took me 8 years of illness mostly stuck in bed to get both chair and bed because of (a) the price (b) not being sure I was sick enough to "deserve" it, same with my wheelchair. THIS WAS A FOOLISH WAY OF THINKING. There's no threshold required to get devices that will make your life easier / less agonising. Mobility aids are for anyone who'll be helped by them.

2. ADJUST EXISTING FURNITURE WITH WEIRD PILLOWS Special furniture will obviously not be possible for everyone, and before I got the chair, I just used a combo of regular pillows and a triangle wedge pillow in bed (though it took trying 2 different wedges to find one that was a good shape for me.)

Last year someone ( @dont-break-hearts I think? THANK YOU) recommended me this shape cushion - some start at £15 on that site. That's now what I use to sit on a regular sofa, though I also always need my legs up at the same height (tall footstool now, but a sideways dining chair works ok) so it's closer to lying down.

These aren't 100% ideal - ymmv, I still need extra cushions and any position gets stiff after a while - but for me are WAY BETTER than just layering pillows or forcing myself to sit up.

#asks #disability #sorry for this long answer lol. but this is the info i needed several years ago so hoping it might help someone #this is all about the UK but I assume these things exist other places #disclaimer this is not medical advice....... I also never received ANY medical advice about this so... it's just what worked for me

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

Hair for the brown ask game?

Thanks for the ask!! (From this world building ask game).

Answering for Alium, the alternate dimension in The Secret Portal.

HAIR - What kinds of discrimination are there? Are they the same as reality?

Oh. OH THIS IS A DOOZY

Ok alright.

The world in terms of culture is all pretty happy to co-exist. There are 10 Sectors but no one really cares where you're from. It's not uncommon for people to be of various cultural descent and you can go anywhere in the world and it won't have a completely monogamous population. So for the most part, racism/xenophobia/any kind of discrimination of culture or origin isn't really a thing.

Same goes for homophobia/transphobia/sexism. Not really a thing. I've kind of in the process of fixing surnames so women don't have to change their names in a M/F relationship and the children can have the names of either parent or both. I did make it a little patriarchal, but I'm working on it.

This isn't to say no one in Alium holds these prejudices. It's just not widespread or institutionalized.

Now ableism - that's the big one. In terms of disabilities that actually exist, there's a lot of technology available for accomodation. Stairs aren't a thing, so people who couldn't use stairs to begin with will be fine. There are gloves/sleeves/etc to help translate gesture-based languages to speech - though they are completely optional to the individual and not enforced. Any real-disability accommodations actually are taught to be entirely up to the individual, who can reject them and not be shamed or mocked for doing so. There's no push - they're just there.

But then come the powers. This is where the root of the discrimination is in TSP.

There are ones specific to a power - such as stereotypes. Telepaths, for example, are stereotyped to be mentally unstable, and most psychological hospitals are populated with telepaths. Telepaths often have to wear dampeners in certain locations. Teleporters can also be warded off. As soon as they're identified, chronokinetics (time manipulants) have their time traveling power suppressed, limited to only smaller changes.

The Class system for power rarity is also sometimes misinterpreted as a hierarchy by those who want to be seen as better for having a more rare power. In general, there are individuals who believe Their Power, or only specific powers, are superior. People with flying and intangibility and other less practical powers can be seen as inferior. Same goes for differing Levels of power - some people don't have the potential for higher abilities.

There are also traditional jobs they are expected to take. Those with superstrength should go into physical work and terrakinetics into construction.

But the most prominent is the Inutilia - the name given to those who never develop powers. If you know your Latin roots, you'd know this means useless. This is a relatively recent mutation where an Alii never develops powers - and in this society this is seen as a disability. This is where the ableism comes in. Society doesn't see a point to them.

The Big Conflict is the prejudice of the Inutilia. After decades of violence toward them, one group had enough and decided to basically attempt to overthrow the oppressive governments of the world and replace it with a new one. Another group was like "hey, how about we try to solve the prejudice without violence!?" And now the two sides are pissed at each other to say the absolute least.

Second group is the focus. As the series goes on, I deconstruct the bias in its leadership and actual more productive ways to counter the prejudice and promote equity. A lot of power corrupts themes. Hehe good luck to me lol.

So that's the basic overview of it? That was a lot. Working on this is super hard but super interesting. Figuring out all the social implications, bias, etc is a LOT. A lot of research too.

Hope that was a sufficient answer lol.

TSP intro

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @fairy-tales-of-yesterday

#the secret portal #tsp #teaspoon #world building #behind the scenes #prejudice #writing ask game #alium #writing blog #writers on tumblr #writing community #writers of tumblr #writing on tumblr #writeblr #writeblr community #ask answered

[adelarsims]

Simblr New Year's Resolution 2024

i was tagged by @pralinesims 💙

ok, so when i say resolutions, don't expect me to actually see all of it through. my resolutions aren't resolute, they're more like a desperate hope that one day i'll suddenly wake up a normal person who can accomplish things. with that clarified:

What's your Resolution for your Simblr?

i want to start posting my story about the morgyn's bloodline and vampires because it's so dark and cool and complicated and living in my head rent free for two years now

or i want to start posting my story about morgan and wolfgang and their families i also want to post this one-shot story about gunther that eats my brain ever since i saw the poem

i want to finish cc projects that i started and dropped because i want to run and hide crying the moment i encounter an imperfection in my work

i want to learn to create cas poses

or, if i'm being greedy, even animations, because i yearn for more sensual but non-sexual ww animations, like hugging and holding each other

i want to make a download page and character page

i want to learn to make specular maps for different types of shine because alpha channels scare me to death

What do you want from the Sims Franchise?

properly working disabilities! for example, i have two wheelchair users among my OCs, i would die for them to have chairs that they could use all the time. i want proper prosthetics, deafness, blindness, some most known neurodivergent traits

bands! i don't even ask for band managing and getting famous and all, i just need the option to play the same music together when a few people are playing instruments in one room, they don't have to be an actual band

a world that has slums, dirty, poor areas, trash and graffiti everywhere, rusty and broken shit

more gothy/punky/grungy clothes

more teen-centered and magic-centered packs because i want new clothes and maybe even furniture for my morgynverse and munchverse

very unrealistic at this point, but i would love to have a second teen age stage, so early teens and late teens could be different and have different activities and interests and way of communicating with others, because like… 13-14 yo are still playing barbies, 17-19 yo do a lot of adult stuff. i don't want my sims to miss out on any of that, and i want to be able to play it out that 13 and 18 yo brothers are worlds apart

a social centered pack whose gameplay isn't actually shallow, or maybe new social interactions that are usable outside of one niche pack and then never again

Any other New Years Resolutions?

i hope i wouldn't contribute to my steady health decline too much this year because i don't have money to deal with it. a painless 2024 would be nice, thank you.

and i want to start living by "better done than perfect". i understand that with my brain, just not my mind yet

i dunno who didn't do it yet because i'm late to hop on this train again, so if you want, please do

#adelar rambling #tag game

[vanillatalc]

what i think is going on wrt covid (basically a compilation of what people who actually know what they're talking about are saying) bc i think i need to write it all down for my own sanity

where we are generally

current worldwide dominant variant is either already or about to be jn.1 which is very immune-evasive (i.e. why it's suddenly winning)

symptoms can be pretty much anything, from asymptomatic, to something indistinguishable from mild allergies, to something indistinguishable from food poisoning, to (EXTREMELY rarely) death

no evidence that severity of disease is either better or worse than other omicron subtypes

at time of writing the UK is seeing an uptick in hospitalisations, which has generally a ~10 day lag on infection time, so we can surmise that covid is rampant atm

where we are w/ long covid

long covid rate per infection seems to have declined steadily since 2020. i like this piece on why the long covid problem has probably peaked already (well sourced, click around)

frustrating lack of cohesion with definition and diagnosis: the CDC defines it as problems going on for FOUR weeks; the WHO only calls it long covid after TWELVE weeks. (personally i think the CDC one is way too keen - it's really not uncommon to have a cough that lasts for 2-3 weeks post-virus and i dont think it necessarily indicates anything "wrong")

there urgently needs to be more clarity re: long covid subtypes: some people are suffering extremely badly with debilitating pain & fatigue, some people have a lingering cough, some people who were hospitalised have been severely deconditioned from lying in a bed for weeks - etc. all of these are conceivably diagnosable as long covid under the current guidelines, with extremely different needs. "long covid" currently comprises such an enormously broad range of symptomology that it seems almost impossible to tease out an individual risk from oft-yelled alarmist statistics like "1 in 10 infections result in long covid". like - ok - what kind of long covid are we talking? bc if you mean "1 in 10 people are still coughing at 4 weeks" i would believe it, but if you mean "1 in 10 people are severely debilitated for years" i would not.

reinfections probably dont incraese the long covid risk by very much, if at all. if you don't get it the first time you're very unlikely to get it the second time

not many (? i dont even think there are any really) treatments for long covid but the patient community is really really driving the research forward

anyway, the outlook for the UK for the next month i think is probably pretty bad on a population level thanks to the new variant jn.1 gaining global dominance, regular seasonal socialising, colder weather, + i wouldnt be surprised if the NHS cant cope (again). there's obviously only so much you can do but you really dont want to be in need of hospital treatment at the beginning of jan, when i suspect things will be worst, when there are no beds + the staff are all overworked hard to say anything about how bad the wave will be on an individual level bc we dont really know anything about jn.1's relative severity one way or the other but the sheer numbers of infected will presumably make it bad at scale if you're in the UK and have plans for christmas (or sooner) i would try and avoid mixing much until those plans happen to be honest, all the data is a week behind at least + even that data is showing large increases in covid activity so the actual picture will be worse by now

also, people whose analysis i generally trust and find helpful - a mixture of doctors / statisticians / biologists etc: paul mainwood oliver johnson prof. christina pagel eric topol jp weiland omicron data there are also a serious amount of covid alarmists on the internet and i find this frustrating at best + actively triggering at worst lol like just bc you're on "the right side" (i.e. you aren't in favour of mass deaths and/or disabling events) you cant just create misinformation + wilfully misinterpret studies lol. like it sucks still but where we are right now is completely different to 2020. if you see anyone comparing covid to "airborne aids" that is your cue to block

#this is such a boring post #i made it unrebloggable bc i didnt cite (many) sources and its not really something i want read as gospel #which i dont think any of my actual followers would do lol #but once it gets out of your own little zone...

[appleteeth]

Im sorry about this i need to rant. I thought things were getting better but Izzy stan Twitter is at it again with their whining, truth bending and self-victimising.

'Do you like OMFD but wish the queer disabled hero didnt die?' IZZY IS NOT THE HERO OF THIS SHOW!!!!! He is at best a reformed antagonist. What an insult to the other disabled characters, and what about the actual heroes of the show??

'We've been betrayed by straight man writing queer stories'. First of all, way to dismiss the other writers. Also, its not his fault you project your personal traumas and mental health on a fictional character on a show with death in the title.

'GB's ending is comphet (?????) because 'we only need eachother' and theyre breaking away from their queer community' ED HAS BEEN WANTING TO LEAVE PIRACY SINCE LAST SEASON!!! also, its progress that Stede was able to resist basic flattery. And David made it clear that they still have work to do. This one truly broke my brain.

Im just sick of all this. Izzy stans have been coddled for the past week, being told its ok to grieve, but theyve crossed multiple lines. I do wish some things had been more explicit in this finale, only because David overestimated the maturity and media literacy of some people.

Sorry for this but i needed to talk to people here. Its beyond annoyance at this point. Im angry and sick of petty crybabies actively working to poison what we've built.

The fact that I sent my own anon rant today shows you're not alone in this, and there are more and more people who aren't afraid to say it. It's infuriating that this very loud corner of the fandom can't get a grip that this wasn't Our Flag Means Izzy, and that he wasn't the hero protagonist.

I've had people tell me they're not going to watch the show any more and right now I'm at the point of "Fine! Good! No need to announce it! Buh bye!" because I don't think I could deal with them watching S3 and getting angrier and angrier that Izzy isn't back (or if he is back as a ghost is still not good enough, etc etc).

Izzy got most of the screen time apart from Ed and Stede this season. He got the best fucking send-off I've seen in a long fucking time. The characters I've cared about over the years who died got at most 20% of the care and love Izzy got from the writers.

Honestly I've managed to avoid most of the most rancid takes because I had the word Izzy muted on twitter and I can only advise you to do the same.

#ask #may delete later we'll see #happy for people to rant in my asks #if you send hate/bad takes i simply delete it

[loadednachosao3]

what I make is WILDLY inconsistent from month to month, which is inconvenient, so it needs to be planned around. I could make $600 or $8k depending on the customers, my health, whether or not I made any content for passive sales recently... my average when you take into account my best customer is about $200/hr, but if I were to just talk to a rando on the phone instead of fucking around with my whale, my rate has me earning about $120/hr. that doesn't include anything extra, like tributes (tips, basically), content buys, or things like that.

that also doesn't mean I WILL make that much just by being signed on. I could wait for hours for a 2-minute call, or I could talk for 3 hours to the same guy and rake in bank. it all depends.

for me, with the niches I've picked, it comes pretty naturally. I've always been a very sexual person, so this career progression wasn't too difficult for me! the hardest part is making sure at the start to learn all the common scams so you can stop yourself from falling for them.

and BOUNDARIES! especially for people who have been socialized not to "rock the boat," it can be difficult to enforce them at first. but you need to be able to do that in this business! even if you market as submissive, stand firm!

but as far as the actual work goes... some guys are more difficult than others because their kinks aren't as familiar to me, or they're really picky, or I need to be tuned the fuck in the entire time... usually though, it's a lot of being mean, laughing at their tiny dicks, and taunting them with my body, which is easy peasy by now!

ok, I guess I lied a bit... when you're independent, there's also the matter of things like marketing, graphic design, audiovisual editing... the clerical work is a SLOG! so be aware if you try to go into it that that's what you're in for. it's a job like any other, so it's not a total breeze!

TAXES TOO!! you have to do them on your own, or get a sex worker-friendly accountant (lots will turn you down if you do 18+ work). so set aside 30% for that (or however much for your area)!

as for its similarities to 1-800-SALAMANCA, I actually based a lot of the content off of my real experiences! I modeled early Nacho off of some of my most annoying customers, lmao. the stubbornness, the hanging up without saying bye, the "you're the Dom, aren't you supposed to tell me my own kinks without me giving you any info???" bullshit, deleting and remaking the account... a little bit of a vent story there, LOL!

now, I don't have as glamorous a career as Lalo, nor do I have nearly as many finsubs. but I've done my fair share of findom before, so Lalo's personality is sort of a mixture of my persona and how I'd imagine him as a character to act! also, the site they use is named the way it is because it's a parody of the site I mainly work on, lmao. but with improved functionality.

I got into it because I had health issues that caused me to quit my vanilla job. I tried to be a freelance writer for a while... what a mistake! I should have gotten right into sex work, then maybe I wouldn't have had to piss through all my savings. I just figured, I like sex, camgirls make money, I'm hot... why not?

alas, camming was a LOT more work than I was expecting, especially with a physical disability! I found out through camming that phone sex was still a thing, and got into that instead. whew! much better! I also create content to sell on several sites. that's good for passive income, which is great on bad days!

as for whether I'd recommend it... I'd say yes, but with caveats. you have to be a certain type of person: firm with boundaries, decently creative, strong stomach, resilient to negative comments and insults directed toward both your body and personality, strong sense of marketing and design (or willing to learn), and the drive to keep going even when it's slow.

what you do NOT have to be: conventionally attractive, allosexual, a nymphomaniac, non-monogamous, white, skinny, cis, big-boobed, attracted to men, completely confident with your body, a total master of everything, into every kink. of course, having some or all of these things will certainly help you (hello privilege), but ANYONE of any sex, gender, color or creed can do this! trust me: there are men attracted to EVERY type of person. and they WILL pay to get what they want (your attention/content).

so I'd say go for it if you think you'd like it, but DO. YOUR. RESEARCH. FIRST! lots of it! you're NOT going to make it big selling feet pics on onlyfans as a total newbie. you CAN make a decent (or amazing) living off of it if you have dedication, creativity, patience, and time, though!

thanks for the thorough questions! let me know if you guys have more!

#ask tag #marcusbrutus #sex work tag

[heaven-is-in-your-arms-series]

I've watched 13 episodes of Beyond Destiny and my experience so far has been...

Prang aka Bunga is so pretty 😍

Ohh, nice background music, reminds me of an Indian melody.

Catch that train Bunga!!!

Oh, they're really going to fall in love straight away? That's not very interesting...but ok, I guess.

Oh, the second lead is Punjan and his character is immediately more interesting than the milquetoast male lead. 🙃

I won't say they aren't cute but I just don't find this romance very compelling at all.

Love a lady with a sharp sense of fashion and a bold lip.

My Prang Punjan bias remains intact (sorry Jes)

They look so good together 😊

Hello amnesia plot, my old friend.

I feel like the drama could be an interesting one where it examines how first loves often don't work out and we watch the couples end up in different relationships after a period of growth but I know that is not going to happen. (Sigh)

She is so glamorous. She could do better than the male lead (sorry Jes, it's not your fault but I am never going to trust a Tawan 😆) but as she wants him she should have him.

Wait, why are they going back to Bunga's home village, that was the source of all the initial trouble, how is it now suddenly safe? 🤨

Bunga in episode 11 of 17

"I remember everything now, nothing will come between us again."

Me, side eyeing the remaining 6 episodes - that seems a little optimistic girl 🤣

See! It wasn't safe!

Nooooooo, (wail of rage) I knew it, I hoped, HOPED to be wrong but we are getting a faked disability plot....

I feel like I'm going to finish this drama and immediately write angry fix it fan fic. 😅

It has potential but I was hoping for more. I don't mind the usual Lakorn tropes if they do it in an interesting way but it doesn't seem like that's going to happen at this point..four episodes left though 🤞🏻😅

#beyond destiny #bunga sari #thai drama #lakorn #period drama #prang kannarun #punjan prama #jes jespipat #may pitchanart #if apo never left for new york he might have ended up playing punjan's role in this #glad to see prang getting a much deserved lead role #hope punjan gets one too

[futurebird]

Your joy is their poison

And now? the Daily Shaming! We've combed tiktok to find people who have FAILED to CONFORM! Look how much they fail to fit in. Aren't you glad that you fit in enough not to be targeted by us? (or do you fit in enough? maybe not! better watch to find out!)

First up here is a video of a man, but he has on a DRESS. Like a WOMAN! Unimaginable! Everyone should wear the correct outfit for their gender. It's not fair that while we're responsible other people get to just run around having fun.

Next up look at this girl! She's FAT but she says she's PRETTY! Impossible! What if this catches on?? People who haven't earned the right to be happy might be happy? Then only we at the Daily Shaming would be unhappy and how is that fair? It's not!

This one is a non-binary person but they look more like one gender than the other as far as we are concerned. YES our opinion matters. Non-binary people must wear gray jumpers and CLEAR lipgloss-- pink is not allowed. We at the Daily Shaming are already confused enough. Please stop confusing us it's scary. STICK TO THE UNIFORM.

And now we have a father who loves to braid his daughter's hair! Is this DAD or is this MOM? This guy has too many muscles for this activity. And now we are getting confused again. Please stop... Why isn't he worried about what the other guys would say? Why isn't he scared of being called gay?

This next one says they are TRANS! Look how happy they are? HOW? We at the Daily Shaming still remember that time the water polo coach said that we "swam like a girl" and now people are running around being trans without a care in the world. Western civilization is crumbling.

So many people WANT ATTENTION ... but who is paying attention to The Daily Shaming?? No one thinks to ask THAT. We are the real victims. Wanting attention automatically makes you bad. More people should pay attention to us saying this. Maybe our truth bombs are just too real?? That must be it. We are NOT crying right now you take that back!

And now for a little BOY helping his sister with her MAKEUP. HE puts on makeup too! Madness! There is no end to all these people just... doing whatever they want... what gives them the right?

This person said they are DISABLED and talked about their wheelchair but now they are STANDING. That can't happen. We on Daily Shaming can't think of any reason why that could happen. No, we have not thought about it for more than a few seconds, but why would we need to?

The Daily Shaming might just seem like mean spirited voyeurism, but we'll now try to convince you that what we are really doing is somehow saving free speech and preventing SOCIAL DECAY. You better keep watching and you better keep track of all the things we don't like or you could be NEXT. If we don't do our jobs more and more people will just do whatever makes them happy and... be happy even though they're supposed to feel BAD. We at Daily Shaming work so hard to fit in... it's not fair that our suffering means nothing. You can't just say "well I don't want to do it that way" you have to do as you're told! These are just the hard truths of life. Even if you do everything right, you still might not be happy...OK? NO. We are not crying again! We just have a very bad cold!🤬😢

#fiction #fiction story #bigotry #fatphobia #gender #conformity #libs of tiktok #conservative mind #conservatives #purgative writing #trans #lgbtq #lgbtq community

[so-bitya]

OK! I had some ideas for the plot and character arcs too i wanted to share. it felt like the show had some great concepts but didn't know where to go with them so..

–Main plot themes/changes

More focus more on the difficulties of growing up, being an adult, reality not being so simple as a child. What can't be easily solve as a precure, and what needs a precure attitude to solve it.

Oh and definitely all the girls are in contact with each other. Like we've been through Covid yall! you think they don't have discord or something?? and they're in contact with the boys too, more infrequently for sure, but they got Syrup, cmon!

–Angel

I think that rather than pollution and climate change, which doesn't really connect with main characters and rather feels too impersonal for the audience, human misery in the current age seems more appropriate. How people get wrapped up in their issues and find excuses to neglect others that it negatively impacts the town. Perhaps Angel was better taken care of in the past and something happened to her caretaker, or something else that's more personal, and she wants to reverse time before the tower is set for deconstruction?

A lot more focus on the passage of time and whether we cling to it too much, glamorize it through our nostalgia, instead of learning from it and moving into the future. I'd like if Angel was influencing the girl's transformations and her monsters were more time themed. (and obv something that saves Angel, because we can't have things too sad. Maybe they stop construction, or they don't stop it but the girls make something out of her memory? Like Komachi writes a book about the tower?)

–Nozomi

I think the first episode encapsulated what i wanted Nozomi's arc to be like. Nozomi became an adult, achieved her dream, and is great at her job! but she still misses being a precure, because the issues she faces as an adult aren't as easily solved back when she was a kid. Honestly, was hoping that the girls didn't transform so fast, or that there was more build up to it? Interesting concept if Nozomi was the last to transform, so she has to solve problems as the adult and feels distant from her friends that can transform.

–Rin

Rin's an adult now and she's got a lot on her plate! Between her demanding job, her hobbies, her family, she also wants to remain Nozomi's ideal best friend. She's genuinely bothered that she can't become a precure anymore, but doesn't even now if she wants to anymore! She and Nozomi have a great talk reexamining their relationship and despite how things change, they'll always care about each other.

–Urara

I thought her struggles were between deciding to be an actress or a singer. I think it would have been more interesting if the play was a musical to use both elements. perhaps Urara wants to emulate her mother too much (aka the actress) she neglects her own strengths (being a singer) keeping the same plot beat of Syrup saying he loves her singing but more involvement from the girls (and they all show up for her musical!!)

–Komachi

Pretty similar to her episode, but I'd like to go into her writing issues!! perhaps she's lost interest in writing fantasy that she was obsessed with when she was younger, so it's giving her both writer's block and a bit of an identity crisis. But after being so involved in the town and learning the townsfolk history, she wants to write about them and gets re-inspired to write more realistic fiction that's grounded and down to earth, that her audience appreciates for being more relatable.

–Karen

Stressed with her job, realizing that she can't simple treat people and expect them to get right back on their feet. She starts understanding some people lives will be permanently changed and can't be healed away (aka disabilities!) and thats okay! its just another matter of adaption. It would be a great mature topic for the show to have.

–Kurumi

Get that stinking manager out of there! Genuinely think workplace harassment should have been a bigger issue!! It would have been realistic issue that many people face, especially women, in the workplace. It would have been nice is Kurumi managed to get testimonies from her coworkers and got the guy fired. Or at least show that she doesn't have to put up with the constant disrespect and move on to a better job (i mean, not leave that for the finale).

–Coco

Cut the melodrama out lol. Honestly would have been fine with him showing up towards the finale so the girls could have some breathing room to revitalize their friendship, but well oh well. I think him having insecurities being king is interesting paralleled with the other girls insecurities after achieving their dreams. I could care less about the romance, but i think it would have been nice if he and nozomi worked on their issues with marriage on screen (like trying to live together for a while). It's nicer to think that they've been discussing it before and the big question during the show is whether they should take that one step further or to stop and move on with life (i don't even think nozomi thought about marriage in show, just being with coco).

–Nuts

idk man I just wanted to see more of him :( like interact with the girls or have a nice talk with komachi! i liked their editor writer relationship and it got him be more open with his feelings and relax more!! let me see it!!1

–Syrup

He's good actually (Except that outfit, throw the whole look out), but it would have been nice to reference his plot a bit, with cure flora and everything?

#sorry nothing for the splash girls #but i figured their fans would have plently of their own ideas #anyway the show did have great concepts #i just want more personal focus afterall... #otona precure

[aluminescent]

Hey, I just finished reading your fic. I'm so interested to see how the story is going to go forward! I wanted to come and say thank you. Rarely do I come across a book or a fic that treats subject's like mental health, disability and sexual violence with such consideration. I believe that people practice power through their words and despite the darkness of your story you seem to be encouraging empathy and openness.

Reading your story I felt so seen. I've recently been diagnosed with PTSD and I've had a hard time accepting that diagnosis but I think that getting to see Spencer's thoughts through this journey really helped me feel more normal. And it also happens to be a wicked coincidence that my trauma is also connected to the deaf community and overbearing parents. I hope it's ok to say these things. Anyway thank you so much.

Hey there, dear Anon,

Words cannot convey how overwhelmingly heartwarming this message is. Thank you so much for having taken the time to read this story. Not only is it a monstrous read in length, but I know the subject isn't easy, and some of my angles/character views aren't everyone's cup of tea. So thank you. I know that there are other writers who approach the subject better or more concisely than I do, so I'm always honored for these kinds of responses. I do my best to give each angle the consideration (and sometimes objectiveness) they're due and have been overwhelmed by research so that I don't fail readers who might find themselves depicted in my story in one way or another. In doing so, I've found so many perspectives to consider that I realized that what I wanted to write couldn't be condensed. I think everyone—everyone, no matter who—has a story to tell, and they all need to be listened to with some measure of empathy.

The fact that you felt seen touches me. Trust me when I say that when I read this, I wanted to reach into my screen and give you a squeeze. No one's situation is the same, but we're all on this ball hurtling through space, and it feels good to be validated through characters who battle with their feelings of highs and lows, intrusive and introspective thoughts, fears and triumphs, and all that fall in between.

I'm honestly so soft for you right now, and I wish you all the good. It's okay to say whatever you feel. No shame here. Again, thank you, thank you 🧡🧡🧡

---

While I'm here (and I hope you don't mind me doing this while responding to your DM, anon) I want to mention to everyone that I have responded to everyone's DMs, whether privately or publicly. My default is to respond to anyone who DMs me on their account privately, but if you want your message and my response to be put out into the universe because you feel that others can benefit or because you're not shy, start your message with the following bolded text:

[PRO]

for 'public response okay' — and I'll respond publicly. If you haven't received a response from me, then the response has been gobbled up by the internet, so message me again, so I can respond.

Thanks to all, you're all loved, and thank you again anon.

#illuminate:anons

[veidtveidtveidt]

PSA

PSA

Guys, I'm drowning in off-topic asks. 

Please, please, please: if you want to talk to me about something that's not about the passwords/downloads, like if you want to correspond with me about Connie, please don't do so via the asks on here, or on Tumblr at all. If you want to have conversations about Connie with me, Pillowfort is the best place for that. 

Why?

-Tumblr is rubbish and I am not active on this hellsite anymore, but only pop in to see password requests here on VVV from time to time. This is NOT my online home. I am not here to hang out and be fannish. Again, I am now on PF and that's that.

-Tumblr deletes all the asks you respond to, because, again, it's shit. If you've written me something nice, I don't want it to be wiped, or lose my reply in cyberspace either, so that's part of the reason why I may not respond to your message. (Yes, I could screencap, but it's not the same thing). And I have to constantly worry about accidentally publishing a private ask! It's all so incredibly unwieldy here that it's utterly rubbish for any meaningful interactions. So, please, please, please, let's use a platform that's far better for that sort of thing. Like PF. It's designed with fannish discussion in mind to begin with. 

-I know what you're thinking. Your neurosis is all aflame with paranoia and now you think I am talking about you specifically, and that I hate you forever and that you're an awful person who's fucked up again and yadayadayada. No. Don't tear your hair out, please! I am not vagueblogging about you specifically nor do I hate you forever; I have just had literally half a dozen people do this and some have sent multiple messages, so my askbox is full of everything BUT password requests. Dozens and dozens of messages that have nothing to do with passwords, some of them just people literally spamming me with their monologues! Please, save monologues for your own blogs; that's what they're for! Don't flood someone who's not asked for it, simply because you share a fandom with them. 

-So, if I haven't responded to your password request yet, this is why. It's harder for me to find the password requests and get down to responding to them, because it takes ages to respond to the off-topics! There; I'm just telling you all what it's like at this end.

-Also, I am disabled and fatigue easily. I have limited computer time and simply don't have the energy to type out messages saying all this to six people separately. Again, my askbox has overrun with off-topic stuff now, and that's not what this blog is for.

So, please, for the love of Connie, let's just stick to the password requests on here, okay? And please, don't send me apologies now, either, because they aren't needed (rather, I'm sending you hugs and such!), and besides, apologies would be off-topic as well--let me just concentrate on the password stuff here and leave the chatting to PF, ok?

I'm just not going to reply to off-topic stuff now, JSYK--but it really is not personal. I promise. Just, I'm exhausted and there's a time and place for everything. Even for geekery.

Thank you! And please keep the password requests coming; I have plenty of bandwidth left.

#psa #please no apologies in the comments either #i really don't have the energy #just typing all this wiped me out!

[pesterloglog]

Karkat Vantas, Terezi Pyrope

Act 6, page 5308

KARKAT: TEREZI, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE ASLEEP.

TEREZI: SHRUG

KARKAT: WHY ARE YOU HERE ALL ALONE IN THE WOODS? OR THE PRETEND WOODS, I GUESS.

KARKAT: AND WHY DO YOU HAVE YOUR DRAGON COSPLAY PULLED DOWN LIKE THAT? IS SOMETHING THE MATTER?

TEREZI: NO

TEREZI: 1M F1N3

KARKAT: YOU DON'T SOUND FINE. DON'T BULLSHIT ME LIKE THAT, I KNOW WHEN SOMETHING'S UP WITH YOU.

TEREZI: K4RK4T PL34S3 JUST L34V3 M3 4LON3

KARKAT: OK, I GET IT IF YOU WANT SOME ALONE TIME. I MEAN, I ACTUALLY JUST GOT DONE SULKING THE FUCK OUT MYSELF JUST NOW.

KARKAT: BUT IT REALLY HELPS TO TALK TO SOMEBODY. YOU CAN TALK TO ME ABOUT STUFF, YOU KNOW THAT RIGHT?

TEREZI: Y34H, 1 GU3SS

KARKAT: IS IT DAVE? DID HE DO SOMETHING DOUCHEY AGAIN?

TEREZI: ...

KARKAT: DID HE BREAK UP WITH YOU? HE BROKE UP WITH YOU, DIDN'T HE. I KNEW IT, I COULD JUST SEE THE WRITING ON THE WA...

TEREZI: H3 D1DNT BR34K UP W1TH M3!!!

TEREZI: 1T H4S NOTH1NG TO DO W1TH D4V3

KARKAT: OK THEN WHAT

TEREZI: 1TS

TEREZI: MY 4NC3STOR

KARKAT: YEAH? WHAT ABOUT HER.

TEREZI: SH3

TEREZI: SH3S JUST

TEREZI: SO

TEREZI: R4D1C4L >:[

KARKAT: HUH?

TEREZI: 1 JUST D1D NOT KNOW 1T W4S 3V3N POSS1BL3

TEREZI: TO B3 SO R4D

TEREZI: 1 4LMOST C4NT H4NDL3 1T K4RK4T

TEREZI: TH3 R4DN3SS

TEREZI: HOW DO3S SH3 DO 1T?

KARKAT: WELL, LET'S SEE. SHE RIDES A FUCKING SKATEBOARD. AND THAT'S IT. PRETTY MUCH END OF THE EXPLANATION.

TEREZI: 1 TH1NK 1T 1S SO MUCH MOR3 TH4N TH4T

TEREZI: 3V3RYON3 LOV3S H3R

TEREZI: SH3 1S SO S4SSY 4ND FUN, SH3S TH3 B3ST 4T G4M3S, 4ND 4LL H3R STUNTS 4R3 1NCR3D1BL3

TEREZI: HOW 4M 1 SUPPOS3D TO M34SUR3 UP TO TH4T?

KARKAT: OH COME ON

KARKAT: DON'T TELL ME THIS IS GOING TO BE A THING WITH YOU NOW.

TEREZI: WH4T TH1NG?

KARKAT: A SELF ESTEEM THING.

KARKAT: YOU REALLY SHOULDN'T BE LIKE THAT, IT'S JUST SO UNWARRANTED.

TEREZI: W3LL TH4TS HOW 1 F33L, SO TOO B4D!!!

KARKAT: TEREZI, I CAN'T STRESS THIS ENOUGH. YOU ARE *NOT* IN ANYONE'S SHADOW.

KARKAT: LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING ABOUT OUR ANCESTORS.

KARKAT: THEY'RE ALL ASSHOLES!!!

TEREZI: >:|

TEREZI: SH3 1S NOT 4N 4SSHOL3

KARKAT: NO, SHE IS. TRUST ME.

KARKAT: THEY ALL ARE. AT LEAST THE VAST MAJORITY.

KARKAT: THEY PRACTICALLY AREN'T EVEN PEOPLE. THEY'RE WALKING, TALKING, LIKE...

KARKAT: I DON'T KNOW HOW TO PUT IT. ALMOST LIKE LIVING PARODIES OF HORRIBLE, CLICHED BEHAVIOR PATTERNS.

TEREZI: WH4T, YOU M34N L1K3...

TEREZI: T33N4G3RS?

KARKAT: YES.

KARKAT: BUT IT'S MORE THAN JUST THAT. TAKE MY ANCESTOR FOR EXAMPLE.

KARKAT: TOTAL ASSHOLE! PROBABLY THE WORST ASSHOLE THERE IS.

KARKAT: YOU WOULDN'T KNOW IT RIGHT AWAY BECAUSE I GUESS HE DOESN'T YELL AT PEOPLE LIKE ME? BUT THAT PROBABLY MAKES IT WORSE.

KARKAT: HE JUST GOES ON AND ON ABOUT THE MOST SANCTIMONIOUS, INCOMPREHENSIBLE GARBAGE YOU EVER HEARD. HE THINKS HE'S BETTER THAN EVERYONE BUT THEN DRESSES IT UP IN THIS BOGUS HYPER-ACADEMIC HUMILITY. HE TRIES TO DEFEND PEOPLE WITH "PROBLEMS" BUT JUST WINDS UP INSULTING THOSE PEOPLE IN BACKHANDED WAYS. HE LECTURES PEOPLE ENDLESSLY, AND WHENEVER HE RISES TO THE "DEFENSE" OF HIS FRIENDS HE USUALLY ENDS UP GIVING THEM A BIG FUCK YOU BY BEING IMPLICITLY JUDGMENTAL.

KARKAT: I COULD REALLY GO ON FOREVER ABOUT HIM, BUT I WON'T, BECAUSE THEN I'D BE STOOPING TO HIS LEVEL.

TEREZI: H3H3...

KARKAT: AND YOUR ANCESTOR? YEAH, SHE'S "FUN" I GUESS. BUT TALK ABOUT A PHONY.

KARKAT: OH AND I DON'T GIVE A *FUCK* WHAT ANYONE SAYS, LOSING YOUR SENSE OF SMELL IS NOT A REAL DISABILITY!!!

KARKAT: HER RAD GIRL THING IS SUCH AN OBVIOUS ACT. SHE'S CLEARLY WORKED FOR SWEEPS ON PERFECTING IT, AND QUITE APPARENTLY REVELS IN THE ATTENTION IT GETS HER.

KARKAT: BUT THE FACT THAT SHE WORKS SO HARD ON IT IS EXACTLY WHY YOU DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.

KARKAT: YOU DON'T EVEN NEED TO TRY TO BE THE GOOD PERSON YOU ALREADY ARE.

KARKAT: SEE, YOU ALREADY KNOW HOW TO HAVE FUN AND BE LIKABLE BY JUST BEING YOURSELF. IT DOESN'T NEED TO BE PART OF SOME OVER THE TOP SCHTICK TO IMPRESS PEOPLE. WHEN SHE DOES THE RAD GIRL THING IT'S LIKE A DISGUISE, PROBABLY COVERING UP SOME PART OF HERSELF SHE'S UNHAPPY WITH. BUT WHEN YOU WITHDRAW AND COVER YOURSELF UP LIKE THAT, YOU'RE ACTUALLY JUST PREVENTING PEOPLE FROM SEEING SOMEONE WHO'S ALREADY BEAUTIFUL.

TEREZI: ...

KARKAT: I KNOW I COMPLETELY FUCKED UP WITH YOU. THIS ISN'T, UH... OK. I'M NOT LIKE TRYING TO REDEEM MYSELF HERE. I MADE MY RECUPERACOON AND NOW I HAVE TO WRIGGLE AROUND IN ITS SLIME. I TOTALLY ACCEPT THAT. BUT AS YOUR FRIEND I REALLY DON'T WANT YOU TO START FEELING BAD ABOUT YOURSELF BECAUSE OF ONE OF THESE SHALLOW, TWO DIMENSIONAL DIPSHITS. BUT I TOTALLY CONCEDE THAT YOU MADE YOUR CHOICE ABOUT ME, AND I RESPECT YOUR DECISION. I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY IS ALL.

TEREZI: ...

KARKAT: OK, I'M PROBABLY JUST STICKING MY FOOT IN MY FUCKING TALK BLASTER YET AGAIN, AND I'M PROBABLY MAKING YOU UNCOMFORTABLE. I GUESS I'LL GO BACK TO MY ROOM NOW. I HOPE YOU TAKE AT LEAST SOME OF WHAT I SAID SERIOUSLY THOUGH.

KARKAT: UM. YEAH. OK, BYE.

#homestuck #karkat vantas #terezi pyrope #homestuck act 6 #page 5308 #homestuck act 6 act 3 #openbound

[ablednt]

yeah and we also need to talk more about the edgy "jokes" to overt bigotry pipeline esp in cluster b spaces. i feel like alot of it is kinda waved away bc ppl will go "that's just how i am and i cant help it. if you disagree youre ableist." like they conflate ableism with being held accountable and non cluster b ppl that dont know better just eat it up. and those same ppl will be the ones who talk about how they had a bullying phase but they grew up. like sorry but you dont just get to usse other other kids for your growth. like its such a white mindset to objectify others like that. and kids of color and intellectually disabled kids are already subjected to enough w/o being treated like. idk almost like pets and then being told, "its just a joke" we didnt hurt you that bad, get over it etc. like no i will always be angry about that shit. and you cant hide behind symptoms either not only bc life doesn't work like that but also. the ppl they did that shit too had the same symptoms they did. they can't be like " you just don't get it you don't understand my struggle" bc we dealt with the same shit and didnt use it to abuse our peers.

Yeah that makes total sense! Also not as extreme (though it's connected imo) I noticed a lot of cluster Bs (and not always white but I'd say it's majority white) tend to fall pretty heavily into exclusionism and harassing other mentally ill people + systems and such because of that "I'm reclaiming being evil(tm) by being an asshole to everyone" phase and yeah the like. complete dismissal of their "bullying phases" as if that wasn't also intense bigotry that they need to unpack lmao. Like I feel like a lot of them go like "oh well I'm different now" and then turn around and are like "ok but I can be racist and also ableist as hell against anyone I want as long as I have a justification for it such as they're inconveniencing me <3"

And then there's the equally bad flipside that's like. The goddamn obnoxious thing white NDs do (that I very much did in the past and absolutely have to take accountability for cause it's cringe as all fuck of me/srs) where they're all like "i'm so Nice being too nice and empathetic and sweet and kind is my whole personality haha" and then when they're racist and someone points it out they're like hhow could u :((( my rsd is going off!!!! :(((((( im always so nice to everyone how dare you. And it's like please shut the fuck up if you were genuinely a kind person you wouldn't have to reassure everyone and yourself every other minute and you'd be actually listening when people are uncomfortable around you.

I guess either way it's just that white people are raised thinking that we deserve to be coddled and that the privilege we have is somehow something we earned or something we're owed when it's so very much not lmfao

And yeah!!! Like it's actually so goddamn infuriating that we're always like "well you don't know what it's like!!!!!!" as if POC aren't often neurodivergent and also like they don't go through things that we will never have any semblance of a clue about just because of the way that racism and ableism intersect. Like just? the audacity that a lot of white nds have to act like mental illness and neurodivergency is a white people thing or like it somehow cancels out their privilege and like it's not entirely our responsibility to make sure that mentally ill and neurodivergent people of color aren't being silenced/talked over in our spaces. ESPECIALLY when so much of the rights we have now we owe entirely to y'all like it's really ungrateful and cringy.

Like the state of the wider nd community and especially the cluster b community is honestly just fucking embarassing and I think a lot of that is due to racism and that's not really surprising since so many forms of bigotry are directly tied to it in the first place. Like it's just a lot and I can't even imagine what it must feel like to have to bear the brunt of that.

All that said I hope that you're able to take care of yourself/g and that you have the support that you need you deserve so much better than you've gotten from us that's for sure/srs