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pupyuj · 5 months

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[cw: dubcon, exhibitionism methinks?, fingering, degradation, humiliation]

well hello! i’ve been gone a while, yes but FEAR NOT you will never get rid of me (unfortunately) 😈😈 have a mean girl wony (completely different from “magic words” wony btw!) drabble for an appetizer tee hee 😋

campus princess wony who never fucking batted an eyelash towards her suitors, even the decent ones, but could never get over how you of all things never once looked at her the way everybody does?? every time you walked past her in the hallways without sparing her ass a glance, she was seething 😭😭 but she would never—and i mean never—go out of her way to make you notice her, nope! she was going to make you obsessed with her in the most organic-but-a-bit-flawed way possible! and her best friend’s small slumber party was the best opportunity to do all that 😈

being invited by mutual friends, you showed up in the most loser fit ever that wony almost wondered why the fuck she was so interested until she watched the way you scrunched your nose to raise your glasses—so fucking cute, wony was actually mad that you gave her butterflies 😭 but even in a small group, you still refused to acknowledge her! it was unbelievable; usually people would kill to be in your place, to be that close physically with her but noooo, apparently you were some hotter shit 😒😒

wony has had the luxury of watching you this entire night… you were so cool and laid-back, you got along with everyone pretty well (except wonyoung), but you were somewhat reserved… you intrigued wonyoung, but she had to save the pleasantries and introductions later bcs holy fuck she needed to hear that pretty voice of yours whimper and moan for her 😳😳 eventually she didn’t care that you were completely ignoring her bcs all she wanted at this point was to fuck you senseless,, that oughta get your attention…

wony following you into one of the bedrooms to get some extra pillows and blankets,, saying that she was there to help until she grabbed you and pressed your up against the door,,

“what the hell are you doing?!”

“do me a favor and shut up.”

her putting one of your wrists behind your waist and pinning the other to the door as she grinds against your ass, nose up in your hair and then leaving soft kisses down the side of your neck… “w-wonyoung, what the fuck?! let me go! a-ah.. don’t…” squirming and resisting as much as you could but ofc crumbling down the moment wony’s kisses get stronger, sloppier, hungrier… completely being at her mercy eventually, moaning at every kiss she leaves on her skin as she always thought you should be… “mhm, all wet..” she whispers in your ear while she felt up your pussy through your soaked panties :((

“a-aahn..! sto—wait, they’ll hear us…”

“good. i want them to.”

holding onto wony’s wrist while she rubbed your clit harshly,, biting down on your lip but it wasn’t enough with the added pleasure of wonyoung’s breath in your ear 😣 “should’ve known this is what it would take for you to look at me… i would’ve fucked you earlier, unnie.” 🫠 her letting out a moan when she slipped two fingers inside you?? relishing in the feeling of your warmth and how tight you were,, you weren’t a virgin by any means but it still caught you off guard… having to clamp your hand around your mouth to muffle your moans,, but wony was quick to swat your hand away,, “bad unnie.” she said through gritted teeth 😵‍💫😵‍💫

the very obvious dilemma you were having with yourself was enjoyable to witness for wonyoung.. how you actively tried to resist her by your breathy “no”s and “stop”s, but would grind back against her and moan so loudly whenever her fingers hit your sweet spots 🫣 but when she notices that you were stopping yourself from cumming.. oh she got mad 😵‍💫 “still keeping the act, huh? fine then.” and she just starts fucking you harder from behind 🫠🫠 she was relentless—pumping her fingers in and out of your cunt and snapping her wrist when she hits that spot just to drive you insane, slapping your ass until it was red, leaving scratch marks on your waist... it was all very effective bcs she had you screaming immediately 😳

her ripping your pajama top off without a single care in the world,, “don’t give me that look, unnie. i’ll buy you a new one.” she jokes but not really—she can buy you a whole mall and you wouldn’t even have to ask! 🫣🫣 wony taking note of the way the sweetest, sluttiest sounds escaping your lips once her hand reaches your chest… once again being so turned on that she moans herself,, “you’re so shameless now… you love this, don’t you? you want our friends to know what exactly is being done to you, unnie, hm?” wony pinching your nipple to force you to moan loudly :(( even giggling a bit bcs she just found this so fun??

really, really talks you through when you’re close and cumming 😵‍💫😵‍💫 all up in your ear while she does all the right things to your body… bite marks and hickeys on your shoulder bcs she couldn’t resist.. holds your hips still with her free hand while she fucked you in that same merciless pace, only a lot more harder bcs wony absolutely needed to see you all broken up for her 🫢

“come on, unnie… you’ll cum for me, won’t you?”

“yes, yes…! show them, let them hear you, unnie…”

“fuck, good girl…”

omgjdhchjs she nearly came with you with how horny she was watching you fall apart on her hand… the sight of your juices dripping down your legs and pooling at your feet made wony want to fuck you right there all over again but she had to suffice with licking your cum off her fingers for now 🤭 but wony barely letting you come back to your senses when she just leaves you in that room with nothing but a side glance bcs she’s just that bitchy??? leaving you to clean up your own mess, grab a spare shirt from your friend’s closet, and forcing yourself to show your face to everybody after all of that… dare wony say that your red eyes and flushed cheeks were more of a turn on that literally feeling your pussy clench around her fingers!!

but even if wonyoung treated you like filth.. she was still too pretty… so pretty that you don’t bother to do any resisting when she sneaks into your futon super late in the night, ready to make you see the stars all over again 🫣

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kooberryfields4ever · 5 months

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releasing a little earlier than anticipated cos it’s 4:30am and i can’t sleep cos i’m busy thinking abt jay ….. i was sooo excited to work on this one icl😭😭 jay nsfw alphabet will be a ride (literally) 🙏 jake up next and then enha hyung line is finished nd i’ll probs start teasing fics/drabbles …. & i’ll probs release ones for jk/soobieboobie too so if ur interested in them pls look out🥺

content warning : nsfw below the cut, dom/sub vibes, ddlg, breeding, spanking/bdsm (minor) etc etc

MDNI !

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

jay is a very attentive and romantically in-tune guy !!! despite how rough he likes to be with ur body he’ll always make sure ur perfectly looked after when he’s done using u

and boy will he use u…… like aftercare is very much necessary….. more on that later :3

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

fingers………… guitarist…… need i elaborate???

and he’s so good with them too like to the point where some nights u beg him to just use his fingers to get u off

his favourite body part of urs is ur ass :3

just loves seeing how red it gets when he spanks u to tears

the way it jiggles after he slaps it n it just feels so good to play with it n grab it n spread it so he can get a perfect view of ur holes all creamy for him :((

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

very clean abt it, likes using condoms so he can throw away what’s necessary and there’s less to clean up

but on the off chance that he’s feeling particularly primal :))

expect to be fucked absolutely to the brim w his cum :))

like i’m talking no holding back full breeding kink jongseong mode, wants to see u full enough to carry a baby even tho ur on the pill nd the chances r so low <;/3

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

has maybe thought abt babytrapping u once or twice😄😄 he can’t help it :(( the thought of u with a beautiful round belly and swollen tits makes his mouth water :(( just wants u bred so perfectly, wants to make u a mummy so bad…..

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

i think jay is one of those naturally gifted sex havers

like i don’t think he watches porn much and like everyone else i’ve spoken abt i think it’s too early into their career and they’re too busy to experience much in their own schedules

but he just gets it,,,,,, like he knows his own vibes and he knows what he’s into and he’s VERY in tune with his partners

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

reverse cowgirl :3

loves to see that fat ass bounce while he fucks u from below….

gives him a god opportunity to pull u back against his chest n wrap his fingers around ur throat too

drives him crazy seeing u get lightheaded while he pounds into ur pussy

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

defos a more serious lover but not in a sunghoon way, more intimidating….

i just see him getting rly turned on when u listen to his instructions and take what he says seriously outside of sex, so i feel like it would apply during as well

but not necessarily always serious

like there are days he feels less dom and just wants to fuck his girl nice and slow, feel u squeeze around him, that’s when he’ll be open to a few giggles and having fun

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

in between hoon and heeseung methinks

like not fully shaven but def trims shorter and more regularly than hee

feels more masculine with hair nd kind of likes when he sees ur nose buried in his bush when u give him head

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

he’s very romantic <3

sex is passion and love and seduction and jay wants to make sure that even when he’s being rough and a little bit mean u know he loves u beyond what he could possibly articulate

so yeah expect candles and roses and slow sensual music while he drives himself deep into ur cunt

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

likes to have a wank every now and again, for his health x

not shy to call u up or text u (sext u) when he wants to get off and ur not around

just be prepared for videos of him jerking it from start to finish where all u can hear is the slickness of his cock in his hand and his quick breaths while he tells u how bad he misses that cunt of urs, wants to fuck his cute little girl so bad….

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

don’t shoot me

a little bit of ddlg

discovered it one night randomly when u guys were discussing ur future and having children and u referred to him as “a daddy” offhandedly

made his cock instantly hard, he just knew that second he had to fuck u and fill u with his cum and get u to call him daddy again the whole night like a good little girl

also think he’d be major into giving praise, not much of a degrader but if ur being a stubborn little girl don’t expect him to be nice about it….

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

bed.

yawnnnnn kooberry will u ever say anything different

no >:( enha hyung line to me (minus jake) want to share their intimacy with nothing but the bedroom !!!!!

like why fuck u anywhere but in his bed where he knows nobody else can see his little girl while he pounds into her tight pussy and works her clit until she’s cumming around his cock again and again :((

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

when ur being rly attentive and good for him, like without realising

like if he tells u to get something from the fridge for him and u do it without question…..

takes all of his willpower to not stop cooking and bend u over the kitchen counter to stuff u full of his fingers nd praise u for being such a good girl for daddy :3

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

probably heavy degradation, calling u a slut, whore etc

i think the worst he’d say is “stop being such a fucking brat” nd that’s if ur testing his patience like pushing his buttons to no end (which he enjoys sometimes)

would also probably start fucking u harder and faster in apology while spanking ur ass beet red for being a brat

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

prefers giving. loves treating u good and making sure ur looked after before him

it’s not sex with jeongseong if u havent orgasmed at least once before he fucks u

maybe even twice

likes receiving too, loves when u relax ur throat around him and let him use his hands to guide u nd fuck ur throat a little

especially when u gag a little omfg. drives him crazy with need like …. ur letting him use ur mouth soooo well like a good girl

defos still more of a giver

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

fast and VERY rough

like shoving ur face into the pillow to get u to shut the fuck up while he pounds into u kind of rough

can’t have anyone else hear how good his little girl takes his cock can he ???? then he’d rly have to punish u

flips u onto ur back so he can pin ur legs against the side of ur head and shove himself deeper and deeper while sucking on ur nipples and rubbing ur clit aggressively

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

he would, by this point he’s an expert with ur pussy and knows he can make u cum easily if ur both needy but on a time crunch

like i can picture him shoving u into the supply cupboard at mubank before prerecording and pressing u against the wall…. has to apologise over and over again for the stretch cos he can’t open u up properly rn but it’s okay cos ur already so wet he can just slide right in anyway :(( and then his fingers are already at ur clit or tweaking ur nipples so u cum first <3 nd he can get u on ur knees and shove his length down ur throat until he finishes with no mess :3

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

sure, risk is a part of the fun ;)

would gladly take u in semi-public places like a fitting room or an unlocked dressing room bc it turns him on thinking about the ways he can get u to shut the fuck up

like how deep can he fuck u while ur mouth is gagged with ur panties ?? the answer is VERY

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

honestly takes him a long time to cum so i don’t necessarily see him wanting to go multiple rounds when ur always so spent after the first from how long he plays with u and fucks u

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

owns them for u and u only

stuff like a small paddle or different vibrator wands cos sometimes he wants to try something new and get u to cum harder, like a challenge to himself

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

teases when he feels like a) u need punishment, or b) he’s feeling like a bit of a dickhead

likes to thrust his raw dick up and down ur wet folds while he opens up the condom wrapper, just to hear u beg a little

but if u beg hard enough (and call him daddy) he’ll forget the condom all together and just slide into u raw nd give his little girl exactly what she needs :((

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

rly low grunts

i just don’t think he’s very vocal otherwise, maybe when he’s praising u or telling u how bratty ur being

but otherwise it’s just his deep sexy grunts

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

u nd him r cooking in the kitchen when his phone rings…. his hands r all messy so he asks u to go answer it and of course like the good girl u are, u obey immediately :3 nd u look so cute when u answer, covering the microphone to whisper “it’s jake” to him, that he can’t help but rinse off his fingers immediately and pin u to the wall……. n he’s being so dirty :(( and unfair :(((( and whispering shit in ur ear like “daddy’s good girl, answering the phone for me, ur not gonna let him hear u now tho are u??” while u try to hold back moans n he shoves his fingers past ur waistband :(((

and jake’s just as confused !!!!! “y/n??? u good??? where’s jay??” he questions while jay plays with ur pussy and kisses at ur neck, telling u to answer

he’s so mean :((( u just have to tell jake to call back later he’s too busy!!!!! hanging up and tossing the phone to the side so jay can finish u off ^_^

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

slightly above average length, not too girthy

made to shove himself deep and fill u up just enough to beg for more :3

circumcised !

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

pretty average, needs to fuck u at least once a week if he can

can do without for a while but just be careful when ur back around him bc there’ll be some subconscious pent up energy there….

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

i think he falls asleep quite easily after sex

likes to clean u up and give u a massage and some food n drink but as soon as he’s done all that and cuddled up next to u he’s out like a light

#koob navi #jay hard hours #jay hard thoughts #jongseong hard hours #jay smut #jongseong smut #jongseong x reader #jay x reader #enhypen smut #enhypen hard hours #enhypen hard thoughts #jay x y/n

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riverstardis · 2 years

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survivor’s guilt:

“that’s gotta be worth at least a tenner of my inheritance” “isn’t that a bit disrespectful to our dead mother?” “isn’t that a bit sentimental for an atheist?” “i’m not technically an— i’m not even gonna go there“ agnostic ethan so true i’m claiming him!! the question is though what is cal? because the way he says that makes it sound like he isn’t an atheist but they never indicated him believing in a god or anything at any other time?

rita asking ethan if he ever just wants to punch cal and him saying “i did punch him once, when i was nine. fractured my thumb metacarpal. not gonna give him that satisfaction again.” sjskdkd bless him

jenny the nurse at their mum’s hospice, of course cal’s gonna flirt with her

ethan saying his mum’s genes were weak because none of her brilliance passed on to him… awkward. what baffles me though is that she had cancer so she knew she was dying but she didn’t think they might need to know they were adopted?

“you’re a doctor on duty, she’s here to see a patient who passed through our ed. the levels of unprofessionalism your libido drags you down to continue to astound me” 2014 ethan would like a word with 2018/19 ethan methinks sksdkkf. tbf though leigh-anne and effie were bc of his trauma rather than his libido. not that that makes it any less unprofessional

jenny saying cal got their mum’s persistence and ethan got the looks and cal’s so offended LMAO

lofty trying to tell people his name but everyone’s already calling him lofty

“using our dead mum to try and pull women? you are pure class”

the first ‘nibbles’!!!

“because it makes me want to break my thumb on your nose again” such a polite way to say you want to punch someone sjskdk

“you keep telling yourself you didn’t take advantage of her state of mind” TELL HIM RITA

ethan snapping and shouting at the teens fighting in reception. that is the way he deals with things: he pushes everything down until he can’t anymore and then he has an outburst that seems like it’s come out of nowhere

“i think your mum put that condition in her will as a challenge to him, not a responsibility for you. it was a slap in the face from beyond the grave and if that doesn’t wake him up to himself then i don’t know what will” i miss rita and ethan’s friendship <3

“good work today, ben” “lofty’s fine”

i’ve heard that holby ruined lofty which is such a shame :(

ethan giving cal his inheritance on the condition that he leaves and doesn’t come back… yeah that’s not gonna work out for you bestie

#classic casualty #survivor’s guilt #bbc casualty #casualty

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tsumune · 3 years

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more than enough

pairing: gn!reader x suna rintarou

synopsis: suna feels insecure about what he offers in your relationship, and after seeing how excited you get listening to your friend talk about the extravagant things her boyfriend does for her, he decides to try something himself.

tags: angst?? to fluff (just slight angst)

suna comes home from practice to find the house silent. that’s odd, he thinks to himself as he looks for you. his muscles hurt, he’s sore, and a small part of him is irritated that dinner isn’t ready, but all those thoughts are wiped from his head when he turns on the lights in the bedroom and finds you fast asleep, your eyebrows creased together and your nose slightly red as if you had just cried.

“y/n? what’s wrong, are you okay?” suna softly shakes you awake.

“mm.. rin? ah, what time is it?” your first thought when you wake is to look at the clock, and to your horror it’s already 8PM. “oh no, rin i’m so sorry i didn’t make dinner yet. i’ll go make some now-”

“hey no, it’s okay. tell me what’s wrong first, were you crying?”

“it’s not a big deal rin. don’t worry about me, but you need to eat.”

suna’s own eyebrows crease at this. “why are you so intent on getting me to eat?”

you look at him with confusion, as if the answer was obvious. “because your game is coming up soon, rin. you have to keep your body healthy and not worry about other things.”

suna frowns at this. he knows he’s not the most expressive boyfriend, but he cares about you so much and wants you to know you’re not second to the other things in his life, no matter how busy he gets. “just because i have a game coming up doesn’t mean i’ll ignore you. tell me.”

he’s taken aback by the sudden tears filling your eyes, and in a panic his hands quickly wrap around your figure. “i got yelled at by my boss... i don’t want to lose this job, rin.”

“shh, you won’t baby. you’re doing so well, one mistake doesn’t define you.” you calm down as suna continues holding you in his arms and smoothing your hair, and the both of you enjoy some takeout and your favourite movie after you relax. but suna can’t shake the heavy feeling in his chest that you were bottling up your feelings in an effort to not worry him, and the guilt that his first thought when he came home was that you didn’t make dinner. it worries him even more.

days have passed since the night you broke down, but suna still feels a bit tense. he won his game, and in celebration you asked if he wanted to go out with your friends. in truth, he just wanted to make you feel better, but you hadn’t brought up the topic since that night, so he decides going out and forgetting about everything might be a good thing. as the night goes on though, his heart only feels heavier.

“and then, he opened the trunk and there were bouquets of flowers and balloons in there!”

suna watches your eyes light up as your friend talks about the latest dramatic gesture her boyfriend did for her. he used to internally roll his eyes at this and think he was being over the top, but looking at how happy your friend was talking about him and how excited it seemed to make you feel, he wonders if you ever smile that brightly when you tell your friends about him. actually, do you talk to your friends about him at all? does he do anything that warrants a story like this? suna isn’t sure if he can remember. sure, you go out for anniversary dinners, but everyone does that, don’t they? if you don’t go to him for comfort, and he doesn’t plan big surprises for you... what does he do for you?

“rin. rinnie. rintarou!” suna snaps back to attention at your voice combined with the flick to his forehead.

“ow!” you laugh, and that was enough to ease a bit of suna’s worries. he decides he’ll take some (albeit dramatic) inspiration from your friend’s boyfriend, and step up his antics so that he can hear that laugh more often.

“can i open my eyes now?”

“no wait, not yet,” suna drags you a bit farther. “okay, now you can.”

you open your eyes, and to your surprise, your bed is decorated with flowers in the shape of a heart. you can’t stop the laugh that bursts out of you.

“rin, what is this,” you wipe your eyes as you laugh. “since when were you so corny?”

suna feels his heart drop at your comment. he worked hard on this. he thought you would like it, thought it would be something he could do for you. thought it would put him up there on the good boyfriend list next to your friend’s boyfriend.

“rin, why did you use whole flowers with the stems still on? don’t people usually just use the petals? silly guy.” you say cheekily, thinking to tease your boyfriend for his random cute act a bit. you admit it’s a bit odd coming from suna, but it’s endearing in a clumsy way, and you appreciated it. but when you turn around to face him, suna’s head is turned to the ground and he looks unexpectedly serious.

“sorry if you don’t like it. just thought i’d do something different for a change,” he says through gritted teeth before leaving to the living room.

“hey rin, wait!” you try to catch his arm as he goes, but he just shakes you off. “rin? i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to dismiss your work like that. i was just kidding.” instead of responding, suna plants himself facedown on the couch.

you start to worry. “rin? are you okay? can you talk to me about it.” silence. “rin... i talked to you last time. can you talk to me too, please?”

at this, suna turns his head. this time, it’s your turn to be surprised at the uncommon sight of his glossy eyes. “i just wanted to be a good boyfriend... you didn’t come to me last time you were hurt, and then i saw how excited you were when your friend talked about her boyfriend’s stupid surprises... i thought you would be happy if i did more of those things too.”

“oh rin.” you sigh and climb onto the sofa, softly squishing him. your hands cup his face and you stare into his eyes, neither of you moving until suna gives in. “what?”

“you’re more than enough for me, rin.” suna has heard these words countless times before. you’ve said them to him often, and in his heart he knows you’ve always felt this way, but with the recent events and mix of emotions he’s experiencing, he feels like he’s been knocked off his feet and swept away by the undeniable love in them. “you don’t have to do the things you see others do, i love you just the way you are. you don’t have to change yourself for me, rin, you’re already everything i could wish for as is. you’re sweet and attentive and always put me first, i’m aware of that, and you show me you care in the little things, like what you just tried.” suna’s eyes shift to the side in embarrassment at the thought of the flowers still sitting on your shared bed. “i wouldn’t mind if you never did that again, but i also wouldn’t mind if you wanted to try again. and i promise i’ll take you seriously. just use only petals next time,” you playfully pinch your boyfriend on the nose, and this time he laughs with you.

the two of you head back to the room to pick up the flowers and put them in a vase (suna was beet red the whole time), and then lay down on the bed to cuddle. after a while, suna turns to you.

“promise me you’ll talk to me if you ever feel upset again,” you open your mouth and suna already knows what you’re about to say, “i know. i know i’m not the best at it either, but i’ll try harder too. you just really had me worried.”

“i didn’t want to worry you before your game.”

“yeah, and i was worried what it meant that you didn’t want to talk to me. so your plan backfired,” he pouted.

“okay okay,” you laugh with a defeated sigh. “from now on, better communication. pinky promise.”

“what are you, five?” suna scoffs, before connecting your pinkies together. “pinky promise.”

a/n: methinks this could’ve been executed better but i just wanted to write something lol might rewrite/reuse the premise of this idea sometime

#haikyuu angst #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu x reader #suna rintarou x reader #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu hurt comfort #suna x reader

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shyficwriter · 3 years

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Temporary Home: Chapter 6

Guardians of the Galaxy fanfic | Reader x Guardians (With Yondu and Kraglin!) Guest starring Nick Fury and Maria Hill

Summary: Peter works on cracking your shell and Rocket just still doesn't like you. Oh, and Fury pays a surprise visit and you accidentally poison Yondu- Oops!

Previous Chapter here | Next Chapter Here Or click here to: Start From Beginning

Author’s Note: I think I knew from the moment I read this post I knew I needed to include something like it in this fic, especially knowing one of my readers had also suggested somewhere that they thought it'd be cool to see how the Guardians reacted to Terran food lol

Word Count: 5,617

You came back inside through the back door more than half an hour later, having decided to run a quick coat of stain over the bed frame pieces. The sooner you applied the stain, the sooner it would dry, the sooner you could apply the varnish. Not that you were in a hurry or anything... You just got excited over having a project, that's all. You totally weren't stalling on going back in the house, or anything.

Peter was sitting in the kitchen with Gamora. The others had seemingly all dispersed by now.

Peter looked slightly disappointed. "Saved you some cookies."

You were slightly taken back in surprise. "Oh, you didn't need to."

"You bought them, I wasn't just not going to save you a couple." Peter said with an odd look. "Anyway, thought you said you were coming back?"

You grimaced slightly and accepted a biscuit from the package in Peter's outstretched hand. "I did come back... I just got caught up with something."

Peter eyed you for a moment, as if he were considering something. He tilted his head, a slight smirk forming. "Are you shy or something?"

You blinked at him. "What? No-"

"Kinda seems like you are. I mean, before you avoided us because you were all cranky and hated us, but you don't seem nearly as cranky today. Heck you even seemed to almost like us today. So the only reason I can see for you to still be avoiding us is that you're shy."

Gamora raised an eyebrow at him, but after a moment's thought, almost seemed to agree with him and turned her expression to you. She didn't think he really believed you were shy. Rather, she figured he was accusing you of being shy to make you come clean about the real problem. He did similar stuff like this all the time to trick Rocket into talking when something was bothering him. She often wondered where he learned it from, until she witnessed Yondu doing the same to Peter one day after he and Kraglin joined their group.

You shook your head at them. "No. That's absurd."

Peter nudged Gamora in the arm. "That's cute. I think she's shy."

"I'm not shy. That's dumb. My line of work doesn't exactly mix with shy." You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms over your chest in annoyance.

"Methinks you protest too much," Peter teased in a sing-song voice.

You narrowed your eyes at him before turning to Gamora. "Is he always like this?"

Gamora half smiled. "Yes... but he might stop if you told us why you keep avoiding everyone."

You sigh. "Look, it's just going to take some time. I'm not trying to avoid anyone, well, not anymore. Just... being around and interacting with a bunch of people is just... not something I'm used to."

"So you are shy." Peter said, his grin almost smug, but mostly teasing.

You sigh in Gamora's direction and she grins sympathetically. "I'm sorry about him."

Before you could respond again you heard a knock at the door.

You looked towards the sound in confusion at who it might be, because you never got visitors. However, you quickly switched to alarm when you realized you had a house full of aliens and no idea who was at the front door. You look out the kitchen window, but you couldn't see a vehicle.

They knocked again.

You turned back to Peter and Gamora. Preferably you'd want to tell them to get everyone to the cellar, but you were concerned on time and knew the curtain was open on the front door window and didn't want to risk whoever it was seeing a bunch of figures fleeing to behind the staircase to the cellar door. You directed Peter to go upstairs and make sure whoever was up there stayed and remained quiet, while you directed Gamora to head into the sitting room, close the door, and do the same while you checked the front door.

Another knock.

You looked at the window of the front door. It was the type of glass where it distorted finer features of subjects, but even with that obstacle, whoever was there seemed to be purposefully standing to the side so they couldn't be seen.

Once Peter and Gamora were out of sight you kept a hand on the knob and tentatively asked, "Who is it?" You eyed the small table by the door where you kept one of your issued guns well hidden. Just in case.

"Fury and Agent Hill. May we come in?" His tone was slightly sarcastic on the second line.

Dammit Fury. You rip the door open. "You ever heard of calling first?"

"No." Fury said flatly, then more sarcastically, "Nice to see you too." He looked around as he entered, seemingly expecting the house to be teeming with more life than it currently seemed. "Where are your charges?"

"I wasn't expecting company. I hid them," you say almost irritably, walking to open the sitting room door, telling those inside that it was alright, it was just Fury. You walk over to the stairs and look up to see Peter peering over the railing and nod to him in a gesture that meant that he and anyone else up there should come downstairs.

When you turn back to Fury he was smiling.

You pinch the bridge of your nose. Of course it was a test, and you complain as much. "Everything's a test with you, isn't it?"

"Not everything," he said. "You should have been expecting us for a weekly check-in."

"You neglected to mention that," you said, slightly embarrassed because you honestly should have expected check-ins even without being told.

"Oh. Must have slipped my mind." Fury said with a wry smile. He knew full well he didn't mention it.

You roll your eyes. "Nothing slips your mind," you confronted, turning now to Maria. She only offered a smile back that clearly said, 'Perhaps if you hadn't been so cranky last time...'

Peter came down the stairs with Mantis, Rocket, and Groot and everyone filed into the sitting room. You caught sight of Kraglin and Rocket again and still had to cover you mouth to fight from laughing before you turned away and tried to keep your face serious. This, of course was much to Kraglin's chagrin and Rocket's annoyance. Yondu noticed and gave Kraglin another strange look, which Kraglin only responded with a shake of his head and an expression that read, 'Please, don't ask.'

Fury spoke when everyone was settled. "This is just a routine check-in. So far your situation has not changed. As expected, NOVA is still trying to make negotiations on your behalf. We're just here to see how everyone is settling in, make sure there are no concerns or problems we need to know about."

"I got a concern," Rocket spoke up.

"If this is about the crib, we don't want to hear it." Maria replied semi-sternly.

Rocket deflated slightly before saying, "I have another concern."

Fury looked unamused, but before he could ask Rocket to elaborate, Rocket was already going into about how you were a dick and how you tossed him outside like a rag doll.

"You were attacking him," you said angrily, gesturing to Kraglin. "Was I just supposed to let you?" Of course the little shit would try to make you look bad to your boss while leaving out the part he played in the situation.

Rocket went on to say that you just had it in for him, and Mantis, who wanted to both try and calm the situation and also defend you, shyly spoke up and said, "Maybe she would like you better if you hadn't tried to poison her?"

Fury and Maria exchanged looks, hers a mix of startled surprise, Fury's one of surprised concern. Surely if there had been an attempt on your life from one of these people, you would have reported it. They turned back, Maria saying, "Excuse me?"

However, she was drowned out by Rocket saying, "That was after!" as if that were a valid defense. "And she wouldn't have died!"

"Yeah, she would have just shit herself half to death. So much better." Peter said sarcastically.

"Why do you care? She bit you!"

This earned raised eyebrows from Fury and Agent Hill. You purposely didn't meet their gaze, embarrassed.

Peter, who felt guilty at the way Rocket was doing you, then stood up for you, "In her defense I did almost break her nose." He caught the expressions of Fury and Agent Hill and added, "We were drunk, it was all just a misunderstanding," as an explanation before realizing he wasn't exactly helping either.

There was more bickering, mostly Rocket saying how much of a dick you were, and others scolding back that Rocket had been the one to start it, then he brought up how instead of helping untangle him and Kraglin you just laughed your ass off, and then others said more things that weren't really helping and everyone was talking over each other while Gamora pinched the bridge of her nose in embarrassed frustration and you rubbed a hand down your face.

"Enough!" Fury said firmly, breaking up the squabbling. "We are not here to listen to petty grievances." He gave the group a stern look. "First off," he looked directly at Rocket, "do not try to poison my agent again. We can just as easily put you in a cell for the duration of your stay on Earth, but I think you'd agree this is a much better venue."

Rocket grumbled something about how'd he'd just escape, but Fury ignored him.

Fury looked at you. "And you- Do try and refrain from getting into fights with your charges." He nodded towards Peter to indicated he specifically meant drunken fights and biting. His tone was as if he was incredulously scolding a child who didn't normally do naughty things, but had suddenly decided to moon traffic. He actually hadn't expected to hear of this behavior from you. You were one of his best agents. He had the humorous thought that this group's dysfunction might be contagious.

You look down and nod. "Yes, sir."

"Good. Now does anyone have any real concerns? Is everyone healthy? Anyone gotten sick? Are the food rations sustaining?"

Peter spoke up, afraid that Rocket would start in again. "We're all fine here. Don't listen to Rocket, he's just cranky and still adjusting. She's been a good host."

Fury grinned slightly as he looked at you. "I'd take that as a glowing review, seeing as it came from the man you apparently bit."

You felt your face grow warm and you didn't meet his gaze. You had a feeling he wasn't going to let that go anytime soon.

Mantis spoke up again, now excitedly. "Oh yes! She's been very kind! She gave me this bear!"

Oh geez. Of course she'd bring up the bear. You covered your face for a moment and wondered if she ever put the thing down.

Fury looked at the stuffed toy in amusement. He could tell it wasn't new. It was in nice condition, but worn more than what would happen with a week's worth of use. Meaning, he felt you likely hadn't gone out to buy it, he had a feeling that it more than likely came from inside the house, which, if his suspicions were correct...

"Nice to see you're making friends." he said with humor in his voice, only briefly meeting your gaze before you broke it again.

Fury kept the rest of the visit brief, asking a few more questions before he clapped his hands together and said. "Alright, I believe we're done here. If nobody has any further questions, we'll be seeing you all next week. You know how to contact us if there are any problems-" he turned and gave a pointed look at Rocket, clarifying, "any real problems."

"Same time?" you ask.

"We'll see," replied Fury, turning with Maria towards the door when no one spoke up with any further concerns.

You frowned. Clearly he intended to make the next visit a 'surprise' as well. You probably shouldn't be surprised, but you didn't exactly like the anxiety attack he gave you with this 'surprise visit,' and you weren't looking forward to another one.

Rocket watched Fury and Agent Hill as they left, biting his tongue. He considered shouting out after him that you wanted to put them in chains, but of course he knew that him simply seeing the chains wouldn't be enough proof. If he called you out now, you'd probably just make something up, or maybe you had them hidden so if anyone went to look they wouldn't find them.

No. He couldn't say anything yet. He was going to bide his time. He had a suspicion he might find answers in the attic. Why else would you have told Groot there were monsters up there to keep him out, if there wasn't something you were trying to hide?

He only needed to find time to get up there when no one would notice.

At the door Fury pushed a button on his key fob and his vehicle shimmered into place as the cloaking disengaged. You looked unamused and both Fury and Maria nodded in goodbye as they departed.

You shook your head with a sigh and closed the door.

***

"I think that went well," Maria said as she buckled in. "No one's been killed yet."

Fury let half a chuckle and just looked at her before driving away.

***

Some time after Fury had left and everyone had supper you decided to treat yourself to some reading. You decided to curl up on the armchair, something you hadn't done since the Guardians first arrived. This was because you wanted to, definitely not to prove to Peter, who was sitting with Yondu at the table, that you weren't too shy to stay in the same room with other people without coercion.

You were sat curled in the armchair reading a horror novel when Kraglin walked into the room, catching your attention. Of course, when you saw it was him you were unable to hold back your snickers, though you tried to hide them behind your book.

Kraglin's eyebrows knitted together. "It's not that funny!" he groaned.

Yondu, who was growing more curious and amused asks, "What's so 'not funny' that she laughs every time she sees yer face, boy?"

Kraglin gives him a pitiful look, but before he can open his mouth to again beg him not to ask Peter answers for him, retailing the whole embarrassing story while giggling, to Yondu's delight as he starts laughing right along with Peter once he gets to the part about Rocket getting tied to Kraglin's butt.

This, of course, makes you laugh harder, and you're now shaking behind your book.

Kraglin looks like he wants to die before his expression switches to mischievous. Sure, you said you weren't ticklish the other day when Mantis was trying to make you laugh, but he was sure that was obviously a lie. He also knew from dealing with a bratty Peter through the years just how to teach you a lesson. Kraglin approaches you. "You think that's funny? I've give ya something to laugh at, brat!" he says, lunging for one of your feet and scribbling his fingers over the bottom.

This lasts all of half a second before you let out a high squeak, which is then followed by an "OOF!" by Kraglin when your other foot connects with his ribcage.

"Ow! You kick hard!" Kraglin whined, rubbing his ribs where you had just donkey-kicked him.

You blushed slightly, peering over your book. "Yeah, well... I suppose it's in your best interest if you don't try that again." You try to sound intimidating, but it comes out sounding more squeaky than you'd have liked.

"Yeah, no shit." Kraglin replied, still rubbing his ribs as he walked over to sit on the far end of the couch, as if afraid to sit too close to you now.

You muttered into your book, "I'm not even ticklish."

Kraglin just rolled his eyes at you, picking up the remote to turn on the television.

Peter and Yondu just kept laughing.

***

The next morning the novelty of having encountered Kraglin and Rocket tangled up had mostly worn off. Mostly. You didn't burst out laughing every time you saw them anymore, but Kraglin was still slightly annoyed that you still couldn't glance at him without cracking a smile. If you had just been happy to see him he wouldn't have minded, but because he knew it was only a result of yesterday's incident, it was slightly embarrassing.

However, it did make him feel a little better to tease you and Peter for jumping when the toaster popped.

You were buttering your toast when Yondu pulled a jar from the pantry. "What're these?" He hadn't tried much Terran food yet, aside from the few times you had cooked and when Peter beckoned him to try something, and today he was feeling adventurous. Might as well. He had the feeling they were going to be here awhile.

You look over to see him already opening the jar of pickled jalapeños and your eyes widen slightly. "Those are jalapeños. I recommend trying one if you haven't eaten them before, they're hot."

"They ain't hot, the jar's cool?" Yondu said, spearing three slices of jalapeño on a fork. Whatever it was, he was sure he could take it. It was only Terran food, after all. What's the worst that could happen?

Seeing the oncoming tragedy that was more than likely about to happen in his mouth you tensed, "No, that's not what-"

Too late. He already ate them.

It was maybe five seconds before his mistake hit him. To his credit, he swallowed, but he also immediately closed the jar. "What the hell!?" he said, looking at you as he tried to suck air into his mouth to cool it down. "What the hell are these things?! My damn mouth is on fire!" He wasn't panicking, to your relief, but he also wasn't happy.

Peter laughed at him. He had thought he remembered jalapeños from when he was a kid, his grandpa would put them in his tacos. However, he didn't try to further warn Yondu with you, wanting to see what would happen. He wasn't disappointed even seeing Yondu glare at him for laughing as he sucked air through his teeth and wiped his now running nose on his sleeve.

You look at Yondu half-apologetically. "I tried to warn you! I told you they were hot- I mean spicy, that's why your mouth burns. Um... here..." You pull down a glass and pour him some milk. "This will help."

He eyed it. "What is it?" He thought it looked like the same white liquid Peter and Kraglin would pour into what Peter called cereal, but he had never bothered to ask them what it was.

"Milk." you answered, getting a very strange look from him in return, a mix of 'What the fuck?!' and near disgust.

Peter spoke up from the table. "It's from a cow. It ain't hers, dude. It's fine."

Your eyes widen, scandalized, as you look to Peter. "Excuse me?"

He looks at you apologetically. "Sorry, I know this is normal here, but uh, on most other planets... you won't really find 'milk' ...unless you're uh, feeding a baby."

A high, "Hmmm..." is all you respond, not sure what else to say to the implication that the blue man thought you were somehow offering him your milk. Your eyes were still wide and you could feel your face growing warm at the uncomfortable information but you still offered out the glass, setting it on the counter between you. "Well this is all I have to offer for the burning. Otherwise you're going to have to wait it out." You cross your arms over your chest self-consciously.

Yondu looked like he was considering for a moment, before hesitantly reaching out to take the glass.

"Drink it slow, it will help with the burning." You then add, mildly scolding. "Next time listen."

He grumbled, but took the glass and sat down at the table next to Kraglin to drink it. Kraglin covered his mouth with his fist, trying not to laugh and looking like he wanted to say something, but Yondu glared at him, grumbling. "Not a word."

Kraglin managed to giggle out a, "Yes, sir." before returning his attention to his cereal, a new food Peter introduced to him a couple days ago that actually wasn't half bad.

Everything was fine for about half an hour or so. You finished your toast and had some juice, and the guys had finished their food as well and the four of you sat in the kitchen talking. Well, they were talking, you were mostly sitting and listening, mostly just making an effort to sit for more than five minutes so Peter would stop giving you that look that said, "Ha, knew you were shy," that he had recently taken to giving you.

Then Yondu suddenly bent slightly and held his stomach with a stifled grunt.

You raised an eyebrow, as did the other two. "You ok?" you asked, seeing his pained expression.

Yondu glared then tensed again, grunting out a "Dammit." before pushing his chair back and making his way quickly from the kitchen without another word.

The three of you shared confused glances.

Then you heard the bathroom door loudly close, and not too long after that began to hear loud noises of the... smelly variety.

Peter half-stifled a laugh, saying. "When ya gotta go, ya gotta go, I guess."

You could hear the sound of the toilet flush a bit later, but Yondu didn't return. Instead you started to hear the "smelly" noises again, followed by muffled cursing.

Gamora entered the kitchen, holding her nose. You knew that wasn't a good sign regarding the smell of your hallway, and you were only grateful it hadn't made it into the kitchen yet, though you were now less than eager to leave and risk facing it.

"Is he alright?" she asked Peter.

"He'll be fine." Peter laughed in response, receiving a look from Gamora as she sat next to him, no doubt seeking a reprieve from the odor.

A few minutes passed and he still remained in the jacks, but the smell had its own travel plans.

"Oh hell," you choke out, seemingly the first one of the four of you (aside from Gamora from before) the smell decided to assault. You motioned to Peter. "You- windows- help- please? Now?" you say, gagging as you stood and made your way to open the closest window.

"Right behind you!" Peter said, standing and quickly making to open any window in the kitchen he could find. Kraglin stood with Gamora and they left the kitchen, stating that they were going to open the windows in the sitting room and see if that might help. You could hear gagging from the hallway when they left the kitchen. Peter made his way further down the room and gagged as he opened the back door, a cloud of stink having unfortunately pooled down that way as it was the end closest to the bathroom.

He braved the stink just long enough to shout, "Damn, man! What did you eat!?" He only got a, "Oh, grow up!" in response from Yondu from behind the bathroom door.

You exited the kitchen from the other end to open the front door, coughing as your fears were confirmed and the smell was much worse outside the kitchen. You wondered if you should open the upstairs windows as well.

This thought was confirmed when you could hear the sounds of Mantis gagging at the top of the stairs and Drax asking if an animal had died in the house, then going on to confirm it wasn't Rocket as he was with him and Rocket indignantly yelling, "Hey!"

You made your way upstairs, Peter taking your lead and following to open the windows upstairs to help air the house out.

Yondu had only just exited the bathroom when you came downstairs, not looking too pleased. However, he only made it about a meter outside the door before wincing as a cramp told him he wasn't actually finished and spinning on his heels to return to the toilet.

Now Peter actually seemed mildly concerned. "Dude, you ok in there?" he called from a 'safe' distance from the door, as if anywhere was safe from the smell anymore.

There was only more embarrassing noises in response to Peter's question.

"Yondu?" Peter called out.

"Leave me alone, boy! Can't ya see I'm a little busy at the moment?!"

"I can definitely smell it!" Peter shouted back.

"I'm gonna head outside," you choke out, looking at Gamora. "Care to join?" It was less of an invitation and more of a hint. If you value air, maybe get out of the house.

"Way ahead of you dorks!" Rocket called as he ran out the front door with Groot clinging to his back, gagging.

Everyone else followed out the front door, not willing to risk walking toward the back.

"Fresh air!" Peter cried out once he was outside in such a funny way you couldn't help but chuckle and shake your head despite sharing the same sentiments.

After a couple moments of taking in the fresh air, you decided to walk around back. While you were out here you might as well fix the swing.

"Where you going?" Drax asked after you.

Before you could answer, Peter replied in teasing voice, "She's running away 'cause she's shy." Gamora elbowed him and told him to quit.

You rolled your eyes but didn't turn back, flipping him the bird. "I am not. Knock it off."

"Then you won't mind if we join you then, huh?"

You shrugged as you continued walking. "I don't care what you do." you say flippantly, turning the corner of the house.

Peter grinned mischievously. "Oh! So you won't care if I do this?" He jogged after you and all the others heard was a squeaky yip that likely came from you, Peter crying "Ow!" and you responding with, "Then quit that!"

Drax called out, "Mister Fury said no fighting!" as the rest of them followed after the two of you.

"Then Gamora, please come get your child!" is what response came from around the wall.

Drax gave a confused look to Gamora. "Does she really think Quill could be your child?"

Gamora shook her head. "No, Drax. She's just insulting Peter for acting like a child."

You glared at Peter as he rubbed his arm.

"Did you really need to punch so hard?" he asked, laughter in his voice despite the pain.

"Don't startle me next time." You warn, crossing your arms and turning back to keep walking.

Peter smirked. "Oh sure. 'Startle.' Looked a lot more to me like that tickled."

You look back to him with a glare.

Peter held up his hands in a defensive gesture and laughed, and you saw the others rounding the corner and decided to just walk away and let him live for now. Definitely wasn't because you were slightly worried he might try to prove his theory in front of all the others.

You unlocked the shed, grabbed the items you needed from where you had placed them on the workbench the previous day, and shut the shed door and locked it back up all before the others really got near. You hadn't told anyone about the bed frame yet and you didn't intend to, at least not until it was finished.

You dropped the chains by the old swing and walked back towards the shed to grab the ladder leaning against the back wall so that you could cut the old rope away from the large eye hooks drilled into the branch that had been embedded in the tree so long they were now a permanent fixture.

On your way back with the ladder Kraglin asks, "Whatcha doin'?"

"Fixing the swing," you say, not looking at him as you set up the ladder.

You grab the two lengths of chains and start to ascend the ladder when he speaks again. "Would ya like some help with that? Those chains look heavy."

They weren't. Well, they were heavy enough to support a person, but not heavy enough, or you weak enough, that you couldn't hoist them up the ladder. "I think I can manage," you say, slightly irritated. Last thing you wanted was some "Let the man do the lifting" crap.

"It's just that-"

You look sharply at him, "Just what?"

"Nothin' ma'am." His voice cracked as he spoke and you turned back to carrying the chains back up the ladder.

Rocket, who kept an eye on you the moment he saw the chains, but tried not to make a show of it, came over and stood next to Kraglin, Mantis following close behind.

"Are you fixing the swing?" Mantis asks shyly.

"Yep." you say, clipping one chain to the eye-hook with a locking carabiner.

"I'm sorry I broke it."

You don't look down, reaching up to attach the other chain as you say, "Already told you, wasn't your fault. The rope was old. Don't worry about it."

"Oh, so if she breaks something you'll replace it." Rocket said bitterly.

You climb down the ladder and look at him in annoyance. "There's a difference between the rope snapping on her, and you almost throwing the remote through the TV screen during a tantrum."

"I was not throwing a tantrum!" Rocket said indignantly.

"Close enough. Fighting with Peter over it, better?"

Rocket doesn't answer, just crosses his arms and glares at you before taking off. Truthfully, he was less mad about that and more surprised that he saw the chains were being used to fix the swing instead of being used to tie him or his team up. But this didn't mean you still weren't a dick. Just because he was wrong about this one thing, didn't mean he was wrong about you probably hiding some dark plans or something. He just had to find it. He certainly wasn't grasping at straws or anything just 'cause he didn't like you...

You reach down and pick up the wooden seat of the swing. You cut off the rope still attached to the eye hooks running through the board and repeat the same process to attach the chain as you had above.

When you were finished to turned to Mantis and said, "Wanna try it out?"

She giggled excitedly and nodded before hopping on the swing.

You smile and pick up the scraps of rope you had thankfully tossed out of swing-range and noticed Kraglin was gone. So was your ladder.

You turned to see him returning it back to where you had gotten it from and you called after him, "You didn't need to do that!"

He replied back with, "I know!"

You shook your head and started to walk back towards the shed to toss the scraps in the rubbish bin, wondering how long it might take for the house to be inhabitable again.

Gamora and Peter watched as you had finished repairing the swing and smiled. Peter internally noted that you seemed to have a soft spot for Mantis. Of all of them, her and Groot always seemed to get your softer side, even when it was obvious you were trying not to make it obvious. He grinned, sure that there were some advantages to be had from that.

By the time you had met back up with the rest Yondu could be seen exiting the house from the back door and walking towards the group, no doubt also seeking refuge from the smell.

Peter grinned cheekily and asked, "Everything come out ok?"

Yondu just glared at him before grumpily turning to you. "I think that milk stuff ya gave me went bad."

Peter spoke up, "Inside of you, maybe. Kraglin and I ate it and we're fine."

Kraglin nodded in agreement, saying he felt fine. He then suggested that maybe it was those spicy things he ate that didn't agree with him.

Your eyes widened and you crossed your arms nervously. You remembered how Rocket had attempted to poison you with the xanti-berries, and think you just realized what happened. You had accidentally actually did what Rocket had tried to do to you, to Yondu. You wince and say, "I'm sorry."

Noticing your change in expression, Yondu asks, "What?"

"I'm sorry," you say again, "I didn't even think that the milk might make you sick."

Yondu made a grouchy face but said, "Whatever. Guess I know now."

Rocket, who had been listening in not too far off came up and said, "So when I try to do it to her, I'm an asshole, but when she actually poisons him, everything's just dandy!?"

You narrow your eyes but before you can spout off Yondu speaks up irritably. "If I didn't even know it would happen, how the hell is she supposed to know, Rat?"

"Yeah, she was only tryin' to help him." added Kraglin. "Ain't her fault."

Rocket huffed and skulked away. "Whatever," he said, waving you all off, "Screw you all."

"Ignore him." Peter said, annoyance clear in his voice, and changed the subject to something less likely to piss everyone off.

Eventually you all were able to re-enter the house again without gagging.

#gotg #guardians of the galaxy #x reader #yondu udonta #nick fury #peter quill #rocket raccoon #kraglin obfonteri #drax the destroyer #gamora #groot #mantis #surprise #earth is space australia

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toss-a-coin-to-your-stan-account · 3 years

Note

A scene where Jaskier is getting drunk as a skunk when Yennefer shows up by his table. And he decides to confide to her but makes her promise not to tell Yennefer. She agrees to see when he’s going with this and he drunkenly rambles about how great she is. “But don’t tell Yennefer she’ll turn me to a toad. I’m too pretty to be turned into a toad!” Yennefer pats his silly head.

THIS IS SO CUTE! One-shot incoming!

"...And she's just soooo lovely!" Jaskier rambled about one Yennefer of Vengerberg, completely unaware that the beautiful lady he'd been blathering to, leaning drunkenly on her shoulder, was the very same witch he'd been going on about. His not recognizing Yennefer came not from any unusual glamour or shape-shifting - no, Jaskier was just that drunk.

"Oh, is she now?" Yennefer played along, leaning her head to the side as she looked at the far-beyond-tipsy bard. She hadn't expected Jaskier to start blabbering drunkenly about her right to her face, but when he told her not to tell Yennefer about what he was going to say - "Don't tell Yenny. Orrr tell Geralt, 'cuz then he'll tell Yenny! A big mess, that would be." he'd said - Yennefer decided not to make any effort to tell Jaskier who exactly she was talking to. Drunk words are sober thoughts after all, and the mage was curious.

(And quite frankly, she wasn't quite sure if she could convince Jaskier that it was her in front of him, or rather, at his side as he leaned against her shoulder, but this narrator digresses.)

But she expected to hear bardly insults and drunken digs at her that he hadn't said to her face yet, not the praise pouring out of his mouth right now.

"Mhm! Her hair is so smooth and silky, and I just looove when moonlight shines off of it. And her eyes! Oh, the most vibrant of amethyst!" Jaskier said, shaking his head to try to get his hair off his face. He following his praise with a hiccup and a giggle.

"And her voice is sooo nice to listen to! It's even prettier than mine, and that's saying alot!" He continued. Yennefer held back a petty remark - "I don't think it says much at all, really." She might have said. - that might have led him on to realize who he was talking to. She liked listening to him sing her praises. Or rather, blather them drunkenly.

"Is it? Hm?"

"Ooooh, yes it is!" Jaskier said with raised eyebrows, as if it was the most urgent of statements to confirm. "Even when she's being mean, it sounds like heaven! I quite like when she's mean, actually. It's sexy. But when she's sweet..."

He twirled his finger around the rim of his pint, staring at the splash of ale that still remained.

"...I really like that too. It's adooorable. But... methinks she'd curse me if I told her." Jaskier said, sounding more disappointed in how he thought he could never say these things to her than he was scared at the possibility of a curse.

"I don't think so, darling." Yennefer assured him. Jaskier only shrugged with a hum.

"...I wanna marry 'er someday, y'know. But I can't."

Yennefer couldn't believe what she was hearing. She wouldn't have been able to if he was sober, she thought, but hearing it while the bard was drunk off his ass made it all but incredulous.

Still, she smiled, smitten.

"Well, why ever not? I don't know of any laws forbidding the union of mages and bards."

Jaskier, as drunk as he still was, seemed almost shocked by such a question, as if it were incredulous. To the inebriated bard, it apparently was.

"How could I? She's incredible! Glorious! How could I ever get down one knee and ask her for her hand in marriage? To spend the rest of her life with me of all people?"

"Oh, you of all people?" She egged on.

"Yes, ridiculous, isn't it? I'm sitting here, all... drunken-like," He gestured to himself and his pint in a way that was little more than just waving his hand around in front of him. "And she's probably off somewhere doing something amaaazing, like killing a monster, or using some spell to take some dickbag mage's cock off his body, or something. Something phenomenal, just like her."

He laughed softly to himself.

"Sheee's a, sheee's a laaady..." he sang to himself, "and Iiii am juuust a baaard..."

Oh, no. He was drunk-singing now - a clear indicator that it was high time for him to retire.

Yennefer scooted out of the booth, much to Jaskier’s dismay as he lolled to the side.

“I think you’ve had enough, bard.” She gently urged, holding out her hands, “Come on, I’ll take you upstairs.”

“Oooohoohoohoohoooooh!” Jaskier huffed his usual indecorous laugh. “No, no, no, Madame! I will not bed with you! My love belongs to another, did you not hear me just now?”

Yennefer tilted her head, holding back an exasperated huff. Wow, he really was drunk off his ass.

“Not to bed you, to take you to your room. Your Witcher’s been waiting for you since he came back from his hunt.”

Jaskier raised his eyebrows a bit and nodded, seeming to recognize such circumstances.

“Ooooh, right, right, yeah.” He nodded as he put his hands in her outstretched ones. “Your hands... they’re soft like hers.”

Yennefer pulled him to his feet, “I try.”

Jaskier was indeed plenty intoxicated, so she wrapped an arm around his waist and started guiding him upstairs.

“Oooh, handsy!”

“I’m not handsy.” she huffed as she continued to take him up, “Just making sure you don’t fall on your arse.”

“So cold...” Jaskier mumbled as he hung his head, “Just like my darling witch.”

“I’m not surprised.” she told him as she found the room Geralt had rented for himself and Jaskier. He couldn’t think her a stranger for too much longer, could he?

Before she knocked on the door, the drunken bard spoke up again.

“Remember, you can’t tell Yennefer what I said. Nooo, no no!” He reminded her as he brought a finger up.

“Don’t. Tell. Yenny.” He booped her nose with each word.

Yennefer was passive to the pokes to her nose; such must have insured, to the inebriated musician leaning against her, that this stranger could not have been Yennefer, for Yennefer would have cursed his member to a thimble’s size if he’d tried to tap her on the nose like that.

“Otherwise,” his eyes widened, “She might turn me into a toad. I’m too pretty to be a toad!”

Yennefer, still endeared by the bard (he was plenty adorable when he was sober, but he’d been especially amusing in this drunken state), brought up a free hand and pat his head.

What a silly, silly bard he was.

“You won’t have to worry about that.” She assured him.

Jaskier nodded, which was more or less just his head lolling back and forth at this pont.

“Aaalright, if you say so.” He accepted as he started to nod off against her side, using her head more or less like a pillow. Yennefer grunted under the weight as Jaskier, quickly blacking out, started to slip into unconsciousness. She moved her free hand to knock on the door of Geralt’s room.

Melitele’s tits, Jaskier was heavy.

She heard footsteps approach the other side of the door until the room’s current, Witchery inhabitant opened it. Geralt stood there, armor having just been removed, looking at the two with a raised eyebrow.

“Geralt, your bard’s drunk.”

#sorry this is so late!#this was just such a cute ask and I thought it deserved a oneshot #and today I finally 1.) was in the mood 2.) had time #and 3.) remembered this was in my inbox #yennskier #yennefer #jaskier #julian alfred pankratz #yennefer of vengerberg #yennefer x jaskier #the witcher #witcher #my writing #answered #mine

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i-did-not-mean-to · 3 years

Text

Boys and sticks - Chapter 9

Fandom: Hobbit (College AU)

Words: 1,5 k

Characters : @linasofia x Thorin, me x Ori

Warning: smut (and insecurities), bad words (1 methinks)

Previous chapters

“You can slip into your pyjama undisturbed.”

“I do not own a pyjama; I…” He stopped and I cranked one eye open a tiny bit to look at the same – surprisingly well-cut – white shirt over formless pants; at least, he had taken off his shoes. “I can leave?” I offered, but he shook his head.

“I don’t know why I’m being such a ninny about it, we’ve been at the lake together and all, but…” Again, he fell silent.

I had troubled him, I realised, he was terribly overwhelmed by the situation and my presence and there was nothing that came to mind to make it better. “Do you want to talk about it?” I tried another avenue and strategy.

“I am not a lady’s men, never have been…and…I’ve been working up the courage to ask you to come to the game – that will now be miserable to watch, I’m sure – and bring Tova because Thorin has been training like an idiot to impress her if she was to come…” He sighed and took a deep breath. “And then, there you were, sitting on that wall, and everything went too fast and now, you’re here and I don’t know what to do with my hands anymore.”

The words fell quick and hard like hail, battering my senses and challenging my befuddled mind to keep up, because I couldn’t help feeling like I was missing something important in his frantic babbling.

“Hold up!” I breached the distance between us and settled my hands gently on his shoulders. “I never wanted to make you uncomfortable,” I promised in a low voice, but he wouldn’t even meet my eyes, fidgeting with the seam of his shirt.

“I should just leave,” I murmured, dejected myself by his unwillingness to engage, and turned to the door. So what if I was to walk across campus in my underwear and a borrowed shirt – without a bra – like a common drunk?

I heard him take another deep breath and I thought that if he brought up my safety again, I’d break his nose then and there; he was an impossible person to have a crush on and I was growing increasingly tired with my own frustration.

“Please…don’t leave!” He sounded utterly miserable now; I let my forehead clunk against the closed door.

“You sure know how to break a girl’s heart, Ori, don’t you?” I sighed and flinched when his warm hands gripped my arms just beneath the shoulders from behind and pulled me around ever so gently.

“What do you mean?” His eyes were huge and pitch black now; he was standing so close to me that I could see the golden specks dancing like stars in the night sky and blurring into streaks of light.

I had known a thousand and one things about them before tonight – or at least, I had thought I did – but the fact that they were actually honourable and chivalrous had never dawned on me; I should have known, it had been weeks of us throwing ourselves in their path and more often than not, they had been looking out for us.

When we had left the party, they had followed to make sure we were alright; they had taken me to my room, believing I was taken ill all of a sudden; Ori had invited me to his room even though he was painfully uncomfortable…

“Nothing, let’s just go to bed. You take the wall, because otherwise, you’ll just fall out of it trying to scoot away from me,” I moaned and made an inviting gesture towards the piece of furniture.

He turned off the light and the faint hint of cinnamon intensified. His hand slid up my arm as he passed by me and shuffled into bed, probably, to let me know that I could climb in right after him.

His bed was warm and comfortable – a clear amelioration compared to the old couch in the library – especially as it also contained him, radiating heat into my shoulder. “You have a huge bruise on your thigh, I am so sorry,” he whispered.

“Worth it!” I grinned into the darkness, spreading my legs just a tad until my skin made contact with his.

“Why me? I have been wondering ever since this afternoon. Why would you come out to invite me?” His voice sounded brittle with insecurity in the inky blackness pressing down on my senses. This was not the moment to confess that I slept with a tiny light because I was afraid of the complete darkness, was it?

“Jia? I’m serious.”

I could literally hear him gnawing on his lower lip; I could see the flustered blush rushing up his face; I could feel the heat intensifying, and I was so lost in my mental contemplation that I forgot to answer right away.

“Can you really not guess?” I jeered – weakly – after a moment.

“You’re having me on? It’s not very nice, you know? I mean, it’s really not my fault, but I am not looking to get into a Carrie-scenario here.”

My gut kinked – and not in the good way – when I heard what he apparently thought me capable of.

“Wow, that’s just plain dumb, dude!” I could no longer hold back my annoyance and frustration.

“If I didn’t know that you seem to dislike him, I’d think that Thranduil has set us up. I mean, why would a girl like you want to invite a guy like me to a party?” He sounded like this was something he had wanted to get out for a long time.

I slipped my hand under the blanket and intertwined my fingers with his wordlessly.

“Thranduil has nothing at all to do with anything. I promise,” I breathed, turning towards him and spitballing the distance, ended up with my lips pressed against his temple.

During the screening of some Netflix-show or other

Tova forgot every two minutes who those people on the screen of her laptop were and if she had already seen them before or if this was the first scene they were in.

She was lying wedged between Thorin’s arm and his chest, her hand ruffling through the whorls of soft, secret hair tenderly and her leg draped across his while his fingers danced along her spine. It was weirdly comfortable and definitely seductive to feel his body this close to hers, his scent filling her head, and his caresses setting her skin aflame.

“Are you watching this?” She asked after seeing another – completely foreign – person launch into a long soliloquy.

“No, I’m wondering if I sound too desperate if I ask you to go to dinner with me tomorrow,” he grinned back, pressing a kiss onto the crown of her head.

“You don’t. I’d make do with a Twix right now and call it an official dinner date.” Tova grimaced which made Thorin laugh. Without much ado, she swung herself on top of him, pressing him into the mattress, and covering his smirk with her warm mouth. He shifted underneath her, and his hand cupped her right ass-cheek gently, the thumb brushing lightly against the delicious curve.

Surging up against her, he panted: “You see, it’s really not that I don’t want to…”

“Hush, you idiot. You’ll have your dinner and your fancy-schmancy routine, don’t worry.” Tova’s lips curled into a liquid smile on top of his as she ground down on him in tight, slow circles that reduced him to a trembling, moaning mess within seconds.

“May I?” He asked, grabbing the clasp of her bra tentatively in one hand and when she nodded, she was surprised to learn that – despite his alleged lack of experience – Thorin got it open in no time.

“You are so beautiful,” he sighed when his huge hand flew around her body to cup one of her breasts gingerly, that thumb that had been her best friend that night grazing over her nipple ever so sweetly.

Tova’s head fell back as she sat up – straddling the poor man – her hands clawed into his chest to give him better access.

Bare-chested and panting, they enjoyed toeing the line, their underwear a swampy cesspool of sin and obvious longing and yet, the agreement that sex would have to wait until after dinner was incontrovertible at this point.

“Let’s have dinner tomorrow! Fuck the team!” Thorin growled, bucking against her frantically, not even caring that they must have looked so ridiculous; all he could think of was the enticing, warm, moist heat seeping through his underwear and the tantalising friction of her grinding down on his cock.

“Hmmm, there’s only one member of the team I intend to fuck,” Tova retorted breathlessly, pressing kisses onto the side of his neck all the way down to his navel. If – at the beginning – he had bemoaned the loss of that delightful pressure, the feeling of her naked chest sliding down his body, in time with her mouth leaving a trail of burning gasoline, made more than up for it.

“So, tell me again about the things you are familiar with already?” She prompted Thorin as she slid her fingers up his thigh, infiltrating them between the fabric of his boxers and his skin.

#thorin oakenshield #ori #fanfiction #the hobbit #linasofia #me #smut #2 women #0.5 success #discussions in the dark #netflix and chill

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orsuliya · 3 years

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Who are you, Miss A-Yue?

It turns out I might be a clown of the greatest calibre! Or... am I?

The thing is, you see, that for some unfathomable reason I became convinced A-Yue was a ninja maid. Which... may not be, in fact, entirely correct, as @girllovescomic had promptly pointed out. Alright, I said. And immediately went to investigate where this possible misunderstanding could be coming from. The results are not entirely conclusive, yet very interesting nonetheless. There are lots and lots of tiny details, which make little sense... unless one assumes that A-Yue is supposed to be Awu’s bodyguard.

The thing is that A-Yue is not among Awu’s original Wang maids. She’s nowhere to be seen in Wang Manor and I cannot spot her in that flock of maids attending Awu during the original wedding. Unless I am more eyesight-impaired than I thought myself to be, this means she appears only later on. But when?

Not during the siege of Huizhou, I can tell you that much. Not during Awu’s visit to Wang Manor after her return to the capital nor upon her entrance to Yuzhang Manor... Why, it seems like the first time we see A-Yue is in the aftermath of Yuxiu’s brave defense of Awu and her subsequent wounding. Awu comes back home, is accosted by Zitan, speaks to a noticeably worried Song Huaien and the next thing we know, she’s being served by A-Yue. This doesn’t have to mean anything, but it looks rather suspicious for an obviously important maid, one clad in an outfit practically identical to Yuxiu’s, to simply appear out of nowhere.

And then A-Yue proceeds to escort Awu back into danger zone, that is, to the Imperial Palace. About five minutes after an unexpected assassination attempt. What’s really interesting is that she keeps very, almost unnaturally close to Awu on this occasion, following just a step behind her at all times. It could mean nothing, of course. And yet, isn’t it remarkable that this relative newcomer is the one accompanying Awu and not Su Jin’er?

It could also be completely coincidental that she is present while Song Huaien thanks Yuxiu for covering her mistress with her own body. Or... is it? You did what I could not, he says, while A-Yue listens attentively from behind Yuxiu’s shoulder.

Another thing: A-Yue makes something of a habit out of physically supporting other people, be it Yuxiu or Awu. And now that I think about it, it does look like she is always prepared to steady or even catch her charge, as needed.

The next thing we know, a very rude eunuch turns up at Yuzhang Manor with an armed escort. If you watch closely, it’s obvious that A-Yue walks one step closer behind Awu than Su Jin’er. And Su Jin’er has the highest possible status of all female attendants barring Auntie Xu. Once things become tense and men start aggresively posturing, Su Jin’er keeps staring ahead, while A-Yue rather noticeably casts her gaze around. Hmmm, could she be assessing possible dangers to her mistress? Who knows...

And again, when Awu walks down the stairs to the provided carriage, A-Yue is the first to follow.

She is then forbidden from accompanying Awu any further, but it’s a rather curious detail all the same.

Next, Su Jin’er is the one who goes with Awu to see Zitan on his deathbed bedrest, which is something that Xiao Qi very much does not approve of. True, Su Jin’er is Zitan’s acquitance, while A-Yue is not... but if that was the only reason, then why doesn’t she go with Awu to visit Jinruo? Instead, A-Yue and Nanny Xu are the ones that do that. Also, guess who runs to Xiao Qi when Awu drinks herself into unconsciousness? No born and bred Wang maid would do that, not as her first resort. And you know what? Xiao Qi allows himself to show some actual exasperation while in her presence.

During Daddy Wang’s coup A-Yue is nowhere to be seen; this time Awu chooses to take Pang Gui with her. Which is understandable, since he’s bound to be better in an outright fight. After the coup... guess which maid gets asked about whether there are any news from Xiao Qi when he’s nowhere to be found late into the night. And which one accompanies Awu and Xiao Qi to Yuzhang Manor when they go to greet the Screechers. Xiao Qi could have very well been the one to choose A-Yue for this outing as Awu would have needed to dress and get ready after her morning lie-in. Also, it would make sense, since I suspect Su Jin’er or Nanny Xu would be Awu’s natural choices for any visits to her childhood home.

Song Huaien is a man on a mission... and he chooses his allies wisely. He, ah, covertly calls A-Yue away from her daily tasks and asks her to play messenger...

...which she teases him for rather shamelessly. But not like a maid with little to none previous acquitance with Song Huaien would do. She’s mean in a very sisterly way, not giggling about his awkward courtship as Yuxiu’s friend might have done, but instead directly making fun of Song Huaien himself. I wouldn’t have expected our general Song to give flowers to a woman, she says, which makes me wonder how would she even know what a total mess he is with such things. Unless she was a Ningshuo girl, that is.

A-Yue’s involvement in the medicine caper is also very interesting. She is the one who makes Awu’s contraceptive tea and reminds her that she should take it. Moreover, her reaction to Auntie Xu taking it away is telling.

She doesn’t protest when Auntie Xu says that the tea might have been steeped for too long. She just turns, observing very closely and even worriedly as the tray is carried away, while at the same time listening to Auntie Xu’s somewhat incoherent muttering. Yet A-Yue catches all of it, why, she even smiles - somewhat condescendingly - at Auntie Xu’s claim of having an excellent nose. And she is so focused on that tray that Awu needs to call her back to reality. But why? I think somebody here might be in cahoots with Xiao Qi, don’t you? It only becomes more plausible as A-Yue turns out to be the one responsible for keeping custody of medicinal herbs.

I also don’t buy her reaction to Auntie Xu’s outright panic in the kitchen. It’s obvious that something is very much not okay, yet A-Yue shows no serious worry. Oh, she asks the right questions and puts on a mask of concern, yet at the same time doesn’t seem eager to investigate further and shuts up when Auntie Xu tells her not to ask any questions. Hello, A-Yue is no cowed housemaid. She makes faces at Auntie Xu and Screecher both, she teases Song Huaien, she acts like an older sister to Yuxiu and doesn’t keep proper distance from her mistress. And now she just shuts up? Yeah, no.

Her behaviour around those herbs is also pretty sus. She’s a bit too helpful in fact, rushing to unwrap them even as Nanny Xu already does the same and she announces herself in a very rehearsed way when she brings back the remaining supply. Here I am, Auntie Xu! Really? What’s more, she doesn’t make a peep when asked to sneak out and discreetly summon an unfamiliar doctor. She simply nods, as if making some calculations in her mind and rushes away. Methinks somebody went to inform Dawang before summoning that doctor. Why? Well, Xiao Qi stops in place once Nanny Xu touches upon the subject of Awu’s medicine. Could be guilt. Could be that he already knows she’s onto him.

Enough about the herbs. Instead, let us look at other outings. Awu wants to keep her first meeting with Helan Zhen secret... and so Su Jin’er is the one to accompany her. Then Su Jin’er falls sick, but she’s healthy again by the time Awu goes to dance for Screecher’s freedom. Coincidentally, by then there is no need to keep secrets any more; Xiao Qi already knows what’s what. And look at what happens when Awu and Helan Zhen go for a walk.

I’m not saying that A-Yue could take out Helan Tattoo. I’m also not saying she couldn’t. Awu knows that she could be walking into danger, so why not take Pang Gui instead? Ah, we’re trying to appear friendly and accommodating? Then A-Yue is a much better choice. If she is a bodyguard in the first place, that is.

Next suspicious thing, although that could be a matter of translation: when A-Yue speaks of Awu going with Xiao Qi to Ningshuo, she refers to it as returning there. Hey, A-Yue, your Ningshuo cred is showing!

Then, when Awu in on the run, she’s very sure that Miracle Baby will be safe traveling alone with only Nanny Xu and A-Yue to protect him and get him to Turnip. Let’s face it, Nanny Xu is not somebody who should be entrusted with what amounts to a covert mission. And yet Pang Gui goes with Awu and Su Jin’er, while A-Yue takes charge of Miracle Baby and Auntie Xu. Miracle Baby is much more vulnerable than Princess Yuzhang, so how come Awu divides the group this way? Unless she absolutely doesn’t trust Pang Gui to behave in a discreet manner... or A-Yue is indeed a secret operative. Or both.

Let’s skip to Awu’s confrontation with Turnip over Auntie Xu’s grave. Pang Gui is the one to invite Turnip to come... and yet it’s A-Yue who remains present during the actual conversation. Could it be that Pang Gui taking her place would be too much of an overt threat? Yeah, okay, that one is a bit of a stretch. And so is this picture:

Very symbolic, don’t you think? It looks as if Ningshuo soldiers are standing guard over Awu. Okay, back to actual proof!

A-Yue, who had never really taken part in dressing Awu or putting up her hair, suddenly does just that as Awu gets ready to play her part in Xiao Qi’s fake coup. Battle music and all. It could be that she’s the last close attendant to be left standing. Which she is, now that I think about it. But it’s also pretty neat that she’s the one to dress Awu for war. And then...

How many ninjas can you see on this picture? Because I see six, five in black, one is salmon. Why would Awu take a maid with her to the palace in the middle of the Yuzhang Acting Company performance? That doesn’t make sense, they’re practically going into battle.

And again, look what happens once Xiao Qi is supposedly gone and Awu is expecting an attack any moment. She doesn’t take Hu Yao with her. Not even a dressed up Hu Yao! She takes A-Yue.

How would a maid - and not even a palace maid at that! - help in evacuating Zitan?

And yet she does. The moment they hear enemy troops moving through the secret tunnel, two people rush to pull Awu back. One has a very respectable reaction time. And it’s not Pang Gui the Inept Ninja.

One bodyguard rushes the client to safety, looking back from time to time just in case, while the other covers their retreat.

Pang Gui is in the know! He must be, since he stays behind to stop Song Huaien’s Mooks, letting Awu charge into unknown danger with only Zitan (oh so useless), his two attendants (also useless) and A-Yue (potentially immeasurably useful) for company. The whole time they’re running through the palace? A-Yue sticks to Awu like a burr, steading her every time she falters. This girl is a bodyguard and a well-trained one to boot!

And oh look, somebody keeps turning to stand face to face with danger, even as Zitan’s attendants huddle behind her.

Once cavalry arrives, A-Yue sprints for Awu and pulls her out of the way, just as Tang Jing commands his people to protect their Princess. Then, perfectly in accord with Tang Jing’s next command, A-Yue gets Awu to safety.

Have I mentioned that A-Yue keeps looking around in a very cold, professional way? This is no brave maid, this is a skilled operative searching for potential threats to her VIP. Neither Tang Jing nor any Ningshuo soldier tries to help Awu and A-Yue, they just cover them. Could it be that they know Awu is in good hands?

And that’s it. Now, coincidences happen. But what’s more probable? That A-Yue is a normal, if very brave and dependable maid... or that she is Xiao Qi’s agent, carefully handpicked to protect Awu and seamlessly integrate into her entourage at the same time? Those two ninja maids Xiao Qi presents to his wife in Huizhou are good fighters, but they don’t exactly make the best maids. Let’s say, though, that they were all he had at hand in Huizhou. But what would stop him from sending for another guard? One who would wait for Awu’s arrival in the capital, rapidly learning all there is to know about being a personal attendant.

So... am I a clown or not?

#the rebel princess #monarch industry #or maybe I am just pulling it out of thin air #anything not to admit to my mistake #but I wouldn't be so sure about that

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cakeandpi · 3 years

Text

Breanna!! major spoilers below

I love that Parker is trying and failing miserably at teaching thief skills because she doesn’t know how to teach this particular student yet.

Harry’s first Leverage-client meeting! And Parker upset that Sophie is taking back the lead, a role that Parker isn’t ready to entirely hand over to Sophie.

Also poor Breanna, she thought she did well on the ‘follow the money’ but came up waaaay short. It’s like showing up for the first class of college thinking it’s just going to go over the syllabus except per the professor’s email there’s already homework due.

Oooh, game of nose-goes? What’s the role that Harry’s going to play that the other’s didn’t want? It can’t just be to avoid playing Sophie’s fake-husband.

“I’ve lose track of the marraiges but I only had one husband.” Where’s my fanfic of all the women Sophie married in her past?

Hahahahaha Breanna managed to pickpocket Harry but she got pickpocketed by Parker. And I love the explanation of “I’m Parker”.

“Get him with a misdemeanor.” Oh Breanna Breanna Breanna. Those can be bribed out of. And oof, Harry’s a bit mean about the whole ‘they don’t care and bribe their way out of trouble’ bit, meanwhile Eliot is very matter of fact. I hope Brianna finds her footing pretty soon.

"I assume it’s rather difficult to rob a casino in general?”/“Eh, kinda.” LMAO PARKER. Also!! Did the Leverage writers finally get to write their casino heist story?

That ‘clothes in trashbags from couch to couch’ sounds like something’s Breanna��s done. Felt a little too throw-away-y for it to not be from her past.

“Hardison used to get me the job. And sometimes, a 401(k).” AMAZING. I love this detail.

Etouffee and jambalaya Brick&Basil truck! “The crescent city’s best local food truck” I love that little sign on the side.

“Huh. I couldn’t find the ‘Get Eliot a 401(k)’ section in the manual.” Omg the manual referenced earlier is for Leverage-thievery-stuff, not just hacking stuff. And of course Hardison would leave a (15 volume) manual for his little sister.

"You can’t plan a grift with a flow chart.” You can if you’re Parker and the flow chart is flexible enough.

“Parker, are you using a flow chart for all your interactions?” Oh no. But at the same time, a sideways callback to how Sophie was using grifting tricks on the team/Nate just because she could.

Parker does a great southern bell accent.

“Renegade. That’s what they used to call me on the job.” Amazing.

“I didn’t put police on your resume!” Oh Brianna, there’s all sorts of reasons someone would leave a job off a resume, he’s just gotta go with one that’s not “it was too long ago”

“Where were you stationed?” Hm, and this is for a casino job? Shreveport. Has to be.

I’M RIGHT

“I don’t miss.” You are going to miss, that’s definitely a Special Disc. And... he misses.

Chaudry’s an attractive looking bad guy.

Parker and cereal!

Oh and Breanna can’t stand the temptation. Also that pearl for whatever reason looks fake, though that might be because I’m more used to fake pearls.

I bet Old Cop’s spreadsheet is gonna be important later.

“I told you not to do it.”/“You would’ve.” Yeah but Parker would have waited, not gone for it right then and there. But Parker doesn’t feel the need to prove herself. Breanna does.

And Sophie keeps it from spiraling out of control by being very matter of fact - they’ve all messed up, but Breanna’s mess up makes her recognizable, so she’s off the front lines for the con.

Breanna leaves out of frustration, only none of the three others notice. Hm. Is she going to go get into some more trouble? Oh, no, she’s gone to be alone out in their hideout’s courtyard.

“Let me guess, you’ve come to make me feel better.”/“Oh, I think I’d be about the worst person in the world for that job.” At least Harry knows his strengths and comforting others is not one of them.

“Oh, poor baby, all you have is money and good looks and privilege and access.” Ah, this is not just about having to be sidelined for this con.

“And what about you, seems like you could do just about anything and all of its scary, what do you want?” And Breanna’s obviously feeling a bit down on herself, but rather than follow her into that mood Harry turns it around on her, pointing out that she is ridiculously talented and can do a lot of things, she just needs to decide what she wants to do with those skills. Does she just want to fool around and mess up and have fun? Does she want to work? Does she want to laze about? Does she want to improve on the skills she has? Does she want new skills? Because each one of those takes her on a different trajectory with Leverage and the team.

“I want the world to stop sucking. ... This team, it says it can make a difference. Okay, fine. I’ll give it a shot. Because I love my brother, and because I’m desperate, not because I believe in hope or something stupid like that.” I love her character motivation speech here.

I’m laughing at Parker getting frustrated because she can’t hide the money fast enough. And then she figures out a way, but they’ll have to make the dress bigger. (Oh, are they going to get the client involved with the dress design? That’d be cool!) And Parker and Sophie have a little talk about how Breanna wants to impress and that Parker’s going to have to teach her. And a reference to how the og team helped everyone on the team get better.

Now that is an amazingly poofy dress. I love it.

They did get the client involved with the dress alterations!! Yes!!

Eliot and Old Cop having cake together. And that’s gotta be some good cake with Eliot genuinely complimenting him.

Oh dear, Parker’s flowchart is getting caught because she’s sticking to it a little to hard, not letting it flow around her. It feels like she should be better at this though, with the 10-odd years that she’s had to do this without Sophie. But this might be more her falling back into old patterns, just like Sophie falling into patterns on leading the cons.

Ooh okay these guys are in on the con. Wait I should know these people?? I... don’t think so but maybe?

Flounce, flounce, kick

Oof. Too much money to carry out. Way too much. And Russian mob. (Is it a very distinctive tattoo Eliot?)

Okay the con’s gone off the rails, so it has to be rescued somehow. Breanna’s figured out a way (“did the math twice”) though everyone waits for Parker’s okay to go through with it. I don’t know exactly what it is - sink the vault into the river? Plant it on various gamblers? Make it seem like Chaundry was stealing from himself? But it rests on Breanna being right and not just showing off. But Parker’s seen that when Breanna’s under pressure - not fake 'practice’ pressure, the real stuff - she can perform, its just when she’s trying to impress that she fails.

“You cut your way through an ice cave. You escaped a gorilla enclosure. And you catered a wedding for the mob.”/“It wasn’t catering. It was a food sensory experience.” Is that a reference back to season one? If not, I really want to know more about that not-catering job!

Oh no!! Old Cop took a hit for Eliot. And as soon as the mafia goon is taken out, Eliot takes time to make sure Old Cop is all right. (If they mess up the con, the family loses the house but they can if needed con Chaundry again and get the house back. If Old Cop dies they can’t get him back.)

Okay Breanna at least has to know the baddies see real camera footage again, right? And Eliot seemed to almost deliberately not-quite look at the camera. They’ve got to be counting on the bad guys finding out and hitting the emergency lock.

All the money’s gone! But... how? Did Parker take Eliot with her into a vent? Fake wall?

Oh sir you are not good enough to accuse Sophie of having conned you without her turning it right back around on you. And she gets a one-person gloat too.

Lol and the pearl is gone.

Squish? Oho. They went through the floor and down the river.

Aww, Breanna’s joined Eliot on the ‘receiving end of Parker’s too-hard physical affection’.

“That was ... my cake, Parker! He made it special for me!” Methinks Eliot doth protest too much about him and Old Cop not being friends.

“I want to take on the bad guys. I have to learn everything.” ‘Have to’ is an interesting choice.

“Parker. My first memory is of 9/11.” Whereas that’s my.... 9th? 10th? grade math-class memory. Breanna's grown up in a very different world from Parker and Hardison - probably Eliot’s background is closest to hers.

And.... Parker how did you steal that pearl? Is this an exercise left to the viewers or a bit of ‘it’s tv, we’re having fun’? (Or both!)

#leverage redemption spoilers #leverage spoilers #spoilers #redemption 1x03

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mydisasteracademia · 3 years

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SFW Alphabets: Himiko Toga

Ah, this cutie! I love Toga to bits. :)

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

You already know Toga is super affectionate to those she likes a lot. When she sets her sights on you, she won’t hesitate to be touchy-feely - and maybe a bit stabby - so be careful.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

She puts on a very happy-go-lucky, cutesy childish persona a lot. You hardly ever see her not smiling... unless someone’s happened to piss her off. She loves hanging around you and while she might try to sample your blood, if you can distract her she likes normal girl stuff too. You likely met in public. She saw you, thought you were the cutest thing, and tried to stab you. Somehow you fought her off, piquing her interest, and from then on she started following you. Somehow you became friends?

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

She loves snuggling up to you with her nose at your neck. Be careful if she tries to bite, unless you’re into that. She can get very clingy when she’s sleepy, so if you’re chilling on the couch and she grabs onto you like a koala and won’t let go, just enjoy it for as long as she’s sleepily doting on you.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

She learnt to cook and clean in school, so she’s fairly good at it. She always daydreams about her perfect man or woman... but it’s likely not what you first think of. Her idea is a bit more... murdery.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Do you honestly think she’d ever end things if she really liked you? If she did eventually get bored of you, she’d just stop following you around and all but disappear from your life with little explanation. She figures she doesn’t have time to waste on people who bore her when she could be spending it on other more productive things (like stalking Deku, I mean what?).

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

She’s likely thought about it a lot when she was younger. Maybe marriage to her ideal person would let her finally be herself. But then that dream was shattered when she left home, and ever since, she doesn’t exactly give it a second glance. What’s the point of settling when there are so many people out there she could ‘become’?

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

She can be pretty hot and cold. Some days she could be rough with you, playfighting and trying to stab you, and on others she could be the epitome of a doting high school girlfriend, nuzzling up to you and loving on you. It depends on her mood.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

She loves hugs! Especially the types where she gets to stab the person afterwards. For you, though, she’s willing to put the knife down for a minute and just squeeze you tightly, her lips at your neck to give you a cute little peck.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

It’s unlikely that she’ll really say it, unless you consider her wanting to ‘become’ you as a declaration of love. I mean... she’s blushing and giving you heart-eyes while she’s trying to stab you in the neck. Pretty close, methinks.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

She can get jealous pretty easily. She hates it when other people, especially people she detests, take your attention away for too long. She can get really pouty and clingy.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Her kisses are often bloody and rough, given that she likes to draw blood when she does so. She likes biting into your lip when you liplock, and if she’s kissing you anywhere else it’s either a soft little peck or she’s biting until she draws blood.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Please don’t leave her around children.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

You don’t exactly spend mornings together, but if she does spend the night she usually clings to you until you force her to get up. Even then she walks around in a sleepy haze, adorable and soft until she really wakes up.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Again, you don’t spend nights together. On the rare occasion you do, she usually crashes in your room with you, wearing borrowed pajamas and giggling until you inevitably fall asleep together. She likes to sleep curled up to you, her ear over your chest.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

No way in hell she’s opening up about her past, but she’ll tell you whatever you want to know about what she likes and hates. She especially loves gushing about Stain. If you’re a fan, then excellent! If not... well...

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

She can be fairly patient, but when something sets her off, she’s set off hard. Especially when you insult Stain.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

She remembers everything she sees and hears, even when you aren’t speaking to her.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

For her, it was probably the moment she first fought you. She noticed you walking home from school, she thought you were breathtaking, and she immediately went in to assess the situation. While your Quirk wasn’t exactly fighting material, you were able to pin her down with her arms behind her back. She’s been smitten ever since.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

She’s very, very protective. She would literally kill for you.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

The two of you don’t do things often, but she does leave you little gifts here and there. She gives you a homemade cupcake for your birthday, which was cute.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Her Quirk’s effect on her body can be frustrating if you don’t have the patience. It’s honestly not her fault she’s obsessed with blood. She can be fairly stubborn and will not do things she doesn’t do. Will not do them.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Very concerned. She always wants to look cute and fashionable whenever she goes out in the morning.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Honestly? Kinda. She’s fallen so hard for you that she finds it hard to imagine a life without you in it.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

She loves it when you help her with makeup! She’s a sucker for a good spa day and loves both giving and receiving makeovers. When Magne was alive, she used to be her main canvas. It’s a big way of helping her own identity crisis ease up a little.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

She haaaaates it when people try to psychoanalyze and ‘cure’ her. Try any of that and you’ll just die. She hates judgmental people and those who hate Stain.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

She goes to bed fairly regularly. She likes to get her beauty sleep and gets really irritable if she doesn’t follow a routine.

#sfw alphabet #himiko toga #toga himiko

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buckmecaptain · 3 years

Text

With Two Os

So, I did a thing for @just-one-ordinary-fangirl ‘s #JOOF500Challenge , and I miiiiight have gone a little overboard with the prompts. Maybe. Kinda. Sorta...uhh... I did them all. (I tried to make sure I bolded them all in this post)

This is silly fluff -falls just short of a crack fic- Steve X (barely described) OC (she has a name and nickname, but that’s about it), with a hint of her having a bit of a thing for Bucky, and even Thor (mentioned). Semi-oblivious Steve, Natasha as the voice of reason, overdramatic OC who might just be kind of a dumbass. Pining, mentions of the rest of the team. Obviously, this story ignores canon and everyone is happily living in the tower. :) Warnings: A few naughty words, suggestive situations, so much dumbassery

Image is from knowyourmeme.com

- --- -- - --- -- - --- -- ---

She pushed her long messy braid over her shoulder, then looked down at the table and sniffled, slowly stroking her fingertips over the glossy surface. “So it's over, then. We're finished.”

“Roxy,” Steve began, reaching for her, “I'm sorry, I-”

She flinched away from his touch. “No. You're gonna have to give me some time. This relationship... it isn't what I thought it was going to be.” She wiped her hand over her face and sighed heavily.

“I said I was- wait, what? It isn't?” His eyebrows were knit tightly together, raised comically high, shoulders hunched like he was trying to make himself smaller.

Turning to face the Captain, her lower lip trembled and eyes were wide. “It was meant to be us. Me and you, Roxanne and Steve, until death do us part. And now you've destroyed that.”

“Seriously?”

She gasped and flung herself backwards onto the overstuffed sofa, one arm thrown across her eyes. “Yes, seriously. You left an undefended gap and the Empire blew up our base!” she whined, gesturing toward the tabletop game with her free hand.

Across the way, Wanda turned to Sam and asked, “If she's this dramatic when she loses a game, what happens when she wins?”

The Falcon chuckled. “Well, let's just say she puts on a show. Dancing tends to happen.”

Steve shook his head at Roxanne's antics. “Well, that's enough Star Wars: Rebellion for tonight. What's next?” He clapped his hands together and they began placing the game pieces back into the box.

“Are Thor and Bucky here? If so, I volunteer for naked Twister,” Roxanne offered.

The Captain whipped his head around and gave her the Eyebrows of Disappointment.

She peeked at him from under her arm. “Hey, a girl can dream, right?”

“Let me guess. It's game night and Roxanne's team lost, right?”

“ 'Tashaaaaa!” Roxanne made grabby hands at the redhead. “So glad you're home! It's been forever and I miss waking up next to you every morning.”

Sam, Wanda, and Steve all did sitcom-worthy double-takes as Natasha snorted.

“Well, if you would set your damn alarm at night, I wouldn't have to come drag your ass out of bed in the mornings for training.” She looked around at the other three people in the room. “What? She's like a sloth. Or maybe a koala. Whatever, she sleeps incredibly soundly and clings, even when dragged out of bed by the ankles.”

Roxanne sat up and crossed her arms, pouting. “So? I need my rest. It takes a minimum of eight hours of sleep for me to look this good.”

Natasha turned to Steve and smirked. “You guys lost pretty badly, huh? Little Miss Queen-of-the-sore-losers is in a snit.”

Roxanne grumbled and dug out her phone from the couch cushions. “Fine. I'mma text Bucky. He'll sympathize. Or, wait... Nat, do you have Thor's number?”

Steve's hands clenched into fists at his side and he grit his teeth. Natasha noticed, of course, but didn't react. “He doesn't have a phone, Rox.”

“Really?” she sat up, wide-eyed, “Who doesn't have a phone these days?” she glanced back down at her screen. “Aw, man. They're canceling my favorite zombie drama. That's stupid with two Os,” she muttered as she ambled out of the room.

Natasha watched her leave, then whirled to face the fuming Captain. “Really? You're still pining over her? When are you going to nut up and say something?” she prodded, glancing at his white-knuckled fists.

A muscle in his jaw twitched. “It's pretty obvious she prefers Buck. Or Thor. Or both, you heard her,” he shrugged and looked toward the doorway, then sighed. “I'm not going to chase after a rejection.”

She chuckled and shook her head. “Methinks you might be stupid with two Os. That woman has had the hots for you since she joined the team, and she's pretty much made a fool of herself for you for the last year.”

He groaned and dragged a hand over his face. “Why is dealing with women so difficult? It's just-just impossible,” he complained.

“Steve, you deal with aliens, terrorists, and murderous lunatics on a near-daily basis. After all that, you still think women are difficult?”

He sighed and placed his hands on his hips. “Bad guys can be dispatched, arrested, or otherwise stopped. Dealing with women takes finesse, and I don't have any of that. Or experience. Give me a murderous lunatic any day of the week. I'd much prefer that. The serum doesn't help with this one,” he grimaced.

Natasha's eyebrows raised. “Okay, Captain Wuss,” she teased.

“That's the first time I've been called that,” he mumbled, “at least, to my face.” The only reply was the Black Widow's signature smirk, so he hung his head and huffed. “Sure feels like I'm being ganged up on around here.” He went in search of the rest of the team in an effort to continue game night, following the sound of cheering and whooping to the media room.

Apparently a high-stakes game of Mario Kart was the cause of the cacaphony. The team was gathered on the plush seating, with Wanda, Sam, Clint, and Bucky playing while Vision and Roxanne watched and cheered them on.

Steve squinted when he saw Roxanne was seated on the back of the couch behind Bucky. He was wedged between her legs and she was running her fingers through his hair, detangling it as she encouraged him to “Kick their asses, Buckaroo!”

Disappointed, Steve frowned and turned to leave, almost crashing into Natasha in the process.

She glared up at him, silently stamped her foot, and pointed forcefully at Roxanne.

Steve shook his head and gestured with his thumb over his shoulder, then crossed his arms over his chest.

Natasha squinted.

He shook his head again.

She raised a finger and circled it in the air, then pointed again at Roxanne.

Steve shook his head again.

Natasha placed both hands on his chest and shoved, making him stagger back a step, then jutted her chin toward Roxanne.

He rolled his eyes, but the redhead poked his chest so hard, he coughed. While he was distracted she took him by the shoulders and spun him around, then shoved. He stumbled forward a couple of steps, then glared at her over his shoulder.

Natasha placed her hands on her hips and tapped her foot.

“Oh what the hell?” he thought, and marched over to Roxanne, standing directly behind her. She didn't notice because of the game noise, so he leaned down to her ear and loudly asked, “How's it going?”

In the blink of an eye, Steve found himself flat on his back with Roxanne on top of him holding a wickedly-sharp blade to his throat, wide-eyed and panting.

“Sorry! I didn't mean to scare- Put the knife down. Please,” he pleaded. “Roxy?”

Roxanne tossed the knife aside and scrambled off of him, then ran out the door.

Steve lay there splayed out like a starfish, staring at the ceiling and wondering why fuckery kept finding its way to him, as his team mates gathered around. They peered down at him curiously, barely-concealed amusement on each face.

“Hey Steve, you dead?” Bucky asked, his lips twitching in an effort to keep laughter at bay.

Clint snickered. “Dead from embarrassment, maybe. Rox is crazy fast!”

Groaning, Steve pressed his palms into his eyes. “You should go talk to her, Buck.”

“Huh? Why me?”

Sitting up, the Captain eyeballed his best friend and snorted. “Obvious reasons.”

Bucky blinked, then looked from Steve to Natasha. “The fuck is he talkin' about?”

She shrugged. “He thinks Rox has a thing for you.”

“Oh. Oh! Really?” Bucky hummed. “I should go talk to her.”

Steve made a strangled moan as Bucky headed out the door, then stood and straightened his clothing. “See you guys later,” he grunted and left the room as his team mates watched, helpless and confused.

* * * *

Roxanne was seated at a window and brooding when she heard the tentative knocks at her door. Ignoring the first few was easy, but it became more difficult when the knocks turned to loud booms. Grumbling, she made her way across the floor. “Okay, gimme a second.” She yanked open the door to find Bucky on the other side. “Oh, hey. Come in.” She went back to her window seat while he stood there shifting from one foot to the other. “Close the door, and sit down.”

He complied and took a seat on the overstuffed armchair. “Everything okay, doll? You kinda took off in a hurry earlier.”

She didn't bother to look at him, her gaze still fixed outside and fingertips trailing over the weave of the curtains. “I pulled a knife on Steve, Buck. Steve!”

“Yeah. It's not the first time that's happened to him. Won't be the last.”

“First for me. He's my Captain. My friend. My very dear friend!” she insisted, “You don't hold a knife to your friend's throat!”

Bucky smirked and scoffed. “I've done that. And shot him. Stabbed him, beat the hell out of him... and he's been my closest friend for eighty years.”

Roxanne pinched the bridge of her nose and grimaced. “That is an entirely different situation...uh, entirely, and you know it. He's never gonna forgive me for this, and even if he does, I won't forgive me.” She slammed her fists down on the wooden window sill with bruising force, a resounding crack echoing through the room.

Bucky was across the floor in an instant, taking her trembling wrists in his hands. “Doll, you're scaring me. Please, just, calm down.” They stayed like that until Roxanne's breathing slowed and the shaking stopped. Finally he released her wrists and wrapped his arms around her as she leaned against his chest, swaying them back and forth.

“Ohh, I feel better already. You're really warm.” She snuffled at his shirt. “And you smell good,” she complimented, resting her hands on his sides.

He flinched. “Thanks.”

Roxanne curled her fingers and he flinched again. “Oh, Bucky... you're so...” she curled her fingers again, “Ticklish!” She attacked his sides in earnest as he tried to fend her off carefully.

“Doll,” he squirmed, trying to back away from her, “Woman! You'd better stop,” he warned.

She narrowed her eyes and smirked. “Or what, Buckaroo?” Snaking a hand into each of his armpits, she unleashed tickle hell. “No mercy!”

Bucky bit his lower lip, trying to stifle his laughter. “Okay, girly,” he snorted, “You've messed with the wrong person.” He twisted away from her and crouched.

Roxanne backed up and her eyes went wide. “Oh shit. I've triggered the Big Bad Wolf!” She giggled crazily and sprinted across the room, vaulting over the couch.

The chase was on. Roxanne had the advantage of knowing the living space like the back of her hand, but Bucky was the superior tactician, so she she managed to keep out of his reach by the skin of her teeth. He finally cornered her in the bedroom, where she'd ended up standing on the far side of her bed, plastered against the wall.

“I've got you!” he laughed, and leaped onto the bed with a victory shout, planting both feet in front of her.

Roxanne squealed and Bucky's fingers contacted her ribs, then they heard a small cracking sound. “Uh oh,” she whispered as the bed tilted precariously and slammed to the floor. They both lie there in a heap for a moment before disentangling from one another and jumping apart, Roxanne at the foot of the bed, Bucky at the up-tilted side. They looked from the crazily leaning mattress to each other and back again, then burst into laughter.

“Not exactly the way I pictured us breaking my bed,” Roxanne quipped, waggling her eyebrows as she pulled the bed away from the wall and surveyed the damage.

Bucky's face flushed deep red and dared to glance at her. “So, uh...” he trailed off.

“Hm? I think I have something I can use to prop this up until tomorrow,” she murmured distractedly from the low side of the mattress. “No big deal. I was ready for something new anyway.” The mattress shifted hard and she looked up to see Bucky was perched on the high side. She held up a hand, forbidding him to continue. “Sir, that slide is for children only.”

Bucky snorted and slid across the surface anyway, landing neatly beside her. “Lemme see.” He raised the mattress and box spring with one hand and peered at the broken side rail, then grimaced. “Yep, snapped right in half. I'll hold this up while you get the blocks or whatever,” he offered.

When it was all put right, Roxanne hugged Bucky, thanking him for helping. If they held on a little longer than friends do, neither mentioned it. “Wanna watch a movie?” she offered, breaking the sudden tension, “You can choose.”

He agreed and she hustled off to take a quick shower while he searched through the titles for the new horror flick she'd been excited to see for a while.

When she returned she shimmied under the covers next to him and sighed happily. “You found it! Been waiting for this one.”

“Uh huh. You're gonna fall asleep, you know.”

“No way. I've been looking forward to this movie for months!”

“Right, sure. Wanna bet on that?”

She growled playfully at him. “All I want to do right now is cuddle with you in bed... is that too much to ask?”

Bucky waggled his eyebrows at her. “That's all? You sure, doll?”

“Well,” she turned to him and trailed her fingers over his chest. “I also want you to take off your pants.”

He blinked.

“You gonna?”

He blinked again.

“Earth to Bucky.”

“Uh, sure, okay.” He pulled off his sweatpants and tossed them carelessly to the floor.

“See? Isn't that more comfortable? Oh,” she squinted at him, “You are wearing underpants, right?”

He blushed furiously. “Roxy! Of course I am!”

“Okay, geez. Those sweats are pilly and scratchy. Ugh, how can you wear those? Get comfy and let's watch this flick.”I've been looking forward to this movie for months!”

They joked and snarked at the movie as it played – it really was written poorly – and generally laughed so much, they missed half of the dialogue.

“Are you kidding me?” Bucky snorted as the main characters made yet another idiotic mistake in the haunted estate. “This would never happen if it was you and me in their place, doll.”

Roxanne nodded. “Right? I'd freakin' lose it, I'd be all up in your face like, 'How could you lose our children in our own house?' Bah!”

They made it through to the end and put on a dumb comedy afterward, but they were both fading fast. Yawning widely, Roxanne squeezed the arm Bucky had wrapped around her waist. “Thanks for helping me feel better, Buckaroo. You're awesome.”

“I sure am,” he chuckled. “Anytime, Roxy-girl.”

They nodded off halfway or so through the movie, warm and comfortable in the temporarily-repaired bed. Bucky awoke somewhere around two o'clock and eased his way out of her quarters, still in his t-shirt and boxers, sweatpants in his hand. As he quietly closed the door and made his way to his room, he failed to notice he was being observed by his best friend.

Steve stood at the corner, watching Bucky leave his girl's room, sadness and jealousy bubbling in his gut. He scoffed at himself for calling Roxanne “his” in his own head and spun around to hit the gym again... only to come face-to-face with Natasha.

“Seems like I'm always catching you running away from Rox,” she quipped, and folded her arms across her chest.

He sighed. “Not running away. Leaving. She's already had, uh, company.”

“Who, Barnes?” she snorted, “I have it on good authority that she didn't bang him.”

The Captain raised a brow. “Oh yeah? How's that, spycams in her bedroom?”

“Careful, Rogers,” she warned. “Because you're hurting, I'll let that one slide. Here.” She tapped at her phone a few times and handed it over, open to a messaging app.

Rox: Natty! I need HELLLLLLLP! Please!!!

-What's the matter? Who do I have to murder?

Rox: NAT

-No, really. I will.

Rox: Nothing like that. I freaked out after almost stabbing Steve and Bucky came to check on me and long story short I asked him to snuggle in bed with me. Did I fuck up????????

-…

Rox: Hurry Natty! Need answers I'm in the bathroom and need to leave!

-There's nothing wrong with you SNUGGLING with Bucky.

Rox: that's all we're gonna do I swear. He's super hot but we're not there yet ya know???

Rox: gotta go thnx I love you!!!!

Steve read and re-read the manic message exchange a few times, letting it sink in. He gave Natasha her phone back and dragged a hand over his face. “Dammit.”

“Uh huh.”

He stood straighter, hands on hips, and cocked his head at her. “That still doesn't mean they didn't... fondue. Going by the timestamp on the messages, they had plenty of time for that.”

Natasha huffed and slapped him hard on the arm. “If Rox had been planning on doing Barnes, she would have asked for wildly different advice.”

With a look, he urged her to continue.

“Oh dear God, you just might be stupid with two Os. She's asked me for sex advice before, obviously.”

Steve frowned. “I don't need to hear this.”

“Actually, I think you do. Remember when you watched 'The Wizard of Oz' with her in your room and she took an oddly long time to bring the popcorn?”

His jaw dropped.

“She asked me how it was possible for you to be such an adorable puppy and so smokin' hot at the same time.”

His face went scarlet. “She asked you that?”

“Yep,” she nodded. “Compared you to a giant yellow labrador retriever puppy. She was hopeful, but it didn't happen. I mean, obviously.”

“I have- I need to- I've gotta go. Thanks, Natasha.” He stepped around her and jogged toward the elevator.

She watched him go, shaking her head and muttering, “All the men in this tower share the same brain cell, I swear.”

Roxanne was dreaming peacefully, quietly snoring into her pillow and curled up burrito-style in her blankets, when she was rudely jolted awake by a loud thumping. Snorting in a completely unladylike manner, she forced herself out of bed and across the floor.

She slumped against the wall and snarled, “It's four in the morning, what do you want?”

Shuffling sounds came from the other side of the door. “It's, uh, it's me. Steve. May I come in?”

“Oh. Yeah- yes, please.” She swung the door open wide to allow him inside.

“Are you okay? You were so upset when you left, and I- I thought you might still be... sad?”

“Really?”

He nodded quickly. “Yeah, so I thought I'd bring something to cheer you up.” He produced a plush yellow Labrador puppy from behind his back and thrust it toward her.

Blinking, she gently took the stuffed toy. “So you thought I was sad, because of...earlier.”

“Yes.”

“And you really thought buying me a puppy was going to cure my sadness?”

His expression mirrored the stuffed pup's exactly and she smiled fondly at him.

“Well... you were right. Thank you!” She tucked the gift under one arm and hugged Steve with the other before gasping and jumping away from him. “I'm sorry!”

“Wait, what? Why are you apologizing?”

Eyes glassy with tears that were about to spill over, she blurted, “You must hate me! I put a knife to your throat, Steve. That's not something you just brush off. We're- we're f-friends. Close. You're my Captain!” there was no stopping the word vomit now, as mortified as she was. Might as well rip off the Band-aid. “And you're amazing and smokin' hot and I've had the biggest damn crush on you for so long and all I want to do is kiss your stupidly handsome face, and... Oh no,” she whined and covered her face with both hands. “On a scale from one to ten how much do you want to punch me right now?” She asked quietly, peeking at him between her fingers.

Concerned, Steve placed his hands on her shoulders and gently squeezed. “Sweetheart, slow down. Just breathe for me, okay?” he soothed. “First of all... No, I don't hate you. We're not there just yet. You'd have to do a hell of a lot worse than pouncing on me with a knife to make me hate you,” he grinned at her.

Roxanne winced. “I- I don't-”

“Are you saying you're plotting my demise as we speak, doll?”

“Steve! I would never, and you know it,” she denied.

He laughed heartily at her distress. “Okay, okay, sorry. Just giving you a little grief. I'll let you get back to sleep.” He turned to the door.

“Yeah, like I'm gonna be able to knock out again after all of this.”

Steve sighed. “Want me to go get Buck for you? Maybe he can help.”

Roxanne rolled her eyes and tossed the stuffed dog onto the sofa. “Steve Rogers, you big, gorgeous idiot!”

He blinked. “Um. I'll take that as a compliment...I guess.”

She flung herself at him and wrapped her arms around his neck. “I've been mooning over you for a year now and- and I didn't know how to- didn't think I should say anything. It's not my place and...”

He held her close and smiled. “I've done my share of pining, too, sweetheart.”

“I have an idea,” she said, then leaned forward and pressed her lips to his for a short and sweet kiss. “Wanna go stargazing and cuddle under the moonlight? What's left of it, that is,” she suggested.

“On one condition. Call me your ‘Captain’ again.”

Trailing her fingertips over his chest, she fluttered her eyelashes and in a breathy voice, asked, “Would my Captain like to go up on the rooftop with me?”

Steve’s chest rumbled and his eyes darkened. “Yes ma’am, I’d like that very much.”

Later, bundled up together on one of the rooftop chaise lounges, Steve and Roxanne weren't doing much stargazing. Caught up in the closeness, the newness, instead they spent the pre-dawn time making out and murmuring sweet nothings, as lovers do, until Steve's phone alarm sounding at half-past six pulled them from their serotonin haze, and they both groaned in irritation.

“We probably should have gotten some sleep, sweetheart.”

“I was sleeping soundly until somebody pounded on my door,” she teased, and poked his chin.

“Uh huh. Was it worth it?”

“I dunno... I was really comfortable, and I need my beauty sleep or I wake up looking like sea hag.”

He tutted and kissed her forehead. “Aw, I'm sorry, doll. How can I make it up to you?”

Tapping her lips with her fingers, she pretended to consider his words. “How about... another cuddle session? Longer this time and with more kissing.”

“I think I can manage that,” he grinned.

“Oh, and bring Bucky.”

He gasped and tickled her mercilessly.

“Okay, okay! Enough!” She kissed him soundly, then they untangled from the blankets and headed for the door, hand in hand.

Steve sighed wistfully. “We wasted so much time, you know.”

“Yeah, maybe we really are stupid with two Os,” she teased, nudging him with an elbow.

He chuckled and opened the door for her. “Maybe so, darlin'. Maybe so.”

She passed him and sauntered toward the residential area, calling back over her shoulder, “About bringing Bucky along, though-”

Thundering footfalls sounded behind her as she squealed and ran for her life, giggling madly all the way.

#JOOF500Challenge #steve rogers fanfiction #avengers fanfiction

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sillyrabbit81 · 3 years

Text

Her Heavy Cross

Summary: Three years after tragedy hits, Lana she decides to start dating again. She meets Will through a dating app and they begin an online romance. After months of constant requests, Lana relents and agrees to meet and go on an irl date with Will. But is Will who he says he is? Lana is quickly pulled into an intense relationship forcing her to confront her tragic past. Will Lana face it or will she close her heart forever?

Pairing: OMC x OFC

Word Count: approx 2.5k

Warnings: Smut, swearing

Authors Note: The story started as a Henry Cavill fanfiction but I changed it to be an original character, but shades of Henry are still there. Hope you enjoy the story and thanks for reading.

Part 6 Part 8

Part 7

Liam's phone rang. He ignored it and let it go to voicemail. When it rang again, he made a noise of disgust and took his phone out of his pocket to look at it. "It's my publicist. I had better take this."

Liam answered the phone and went outside to talk. I turned the oven on and started to unpack the groceries. Then I got the roast, put it in a baking tray, poured olive oil over the top and seasoned it with salt and some pepper. I got out some onions and garlic and started to cut them up to place around the roast to give it some added flavour.

"That looks great," Liam said when he came back in.

"Thanks," I said, and I gave him a grin. I took the tray and put it in the oven. I got my phone and put an alarm on, giving myself time to cook the veggies before they finished. A thought came to me, and before I could bite my tongue, I said, "They do say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach."

"Really?" Liam licked his lips, looked down at his pants and said, "I'd say they were aiming too high."

It took me a minute to work out what the joke was. When I finally did, I couldn't help but laugh and hide my face in my hands.

"You've gone so red!" Liam appeared to be having fun with my inability to control my blushes.

"Oh, my God!" I said, still hiding my face and laughing. "Alright, that was funny."

It took me a while to stop laughing. When I did, Liam said sombrely, "Sweetheart, I have to tell you something."

"Uh, oh, it doesn't sound good."

"It's not bad. I don't know how you will feel about it." Liam then told me that his publicist had called to let him know there were pictures put on Instagram and Twitter of the two of us kissing at the pub last night. "Your name hasn't been mentioned, and the photos look to be shot from pretty far away on a mobile, so someone in the pub took the pictures. Sarah says they probably aren't going to tell who you are by the pictures unless someone who knows you well comes forward."

I think if my eyes bulged out of my head any further, they would have fallen out and rolled on the floor. "That quick?" It was all I could think to say.

"Yeah. It's hard to know what will come out and when. A lot of times I go out, and no one notices me, but other times I have paps or members of the public following me for hours."

"Who's Sarah?"

"My publicist." Liam reached across the bench and took my hand in his. "Are you ok?"

"You say they don't know who I am?" Liam nodded, and I breathed a sigh of relief. I wasn't happy but what was I going to do about it? I picked at my nails. I needed to paint them; the pale pink polish was starting to chip.

"You ok?" Liam asked again

I shrugged. "Your life is weird."

Liam chucked. "You keep telling me that."

"So, what happens now?"

"Well, usually Sarah would say to private all social media, but she had a look and said she could only find a Facebook profile for you which was already private. Do you have any others? Instagram? Twitter? Snapchat?"

"No. I have a YouTube account that I use to watch videos, but that isn't linked to my real name or email. Also, a Tumblr account, again not associated with my name. And no pictures of me."

"Tumblr?" He raised an eyebrow. His fucking lip twitched.

"I was a confused 22-year-old ok?" I said a bit defensively. "I haven't used it in years," I remembered then the dating site we met on. I quickly logged on and selected the options to hide the account.

"Ok, well, there's not much else right now. A few rags called Sarah for comment. She said the standard no comment and asked for my privacy to be respected. The rest is up to you."

"Up to me?" I asked, confused. "What's up to me?"

"When you want to confirm the relationship and release your name."

"Liam, I met you less than 24 hours ago and have known you only a few months. I'm not ready for that. I like you a lot, but maybe you pick your nose and eat it, and I'll have to dump your arse tomorrow and then it's been a big song and dance over nothing." I joked. The mood had gotten too heavy for me. I wanted to talk about something else.

"Sweetheart, I'd never do that." He smiled sweetly, "I'd make you eat it."

"Ewww!" I screamed.

"Get over here." He chased me around the bench, and after a few evasions and some more squeals, he caught me. Perrin came in through the doggy door and barked at Liam a few times. Our behaviour obviously scandalised him. "Perrin," I called. "Come here, boy."

"You think your dog can save you?"

"Of course, he's very protective of my honour."

"We will see about that." Liam bent over, and I thought he was going to tackle me. Instead of flying backwards, I was hoisted forward and found myself over his shoulder. I screamed as I heard a loud crack, my hands flying to my bum.

"Did you just smack my arse?" I must admit I was finding all the manhandling arousing. I wasn't going to let him know that, though.

"Yes, I did. Want another?" Liam was heading down the hallway, taking me to the bedroom.

I giggled. "No!"

"The lady doth protest too much, methinks," Liam quoted. Shakespeare sounded good with his accent. I giggled some more, and I got another one. Yes, very arousing.

Liam hummed. "I quite like the view here." He rubbed my bottom and took me into my bedroom.

I was very close to his round bum. "This view is not so bad either," I said and smacked his arse. Unfortunately, it probably hurt me more than it hurt him. His butt was tight!

Liam dropped me onto the bed at that point, and the look on his face was hysterical. I couldn't stop laughing, and tears were rolling down my face. Then I did the most embarrassing thing: I snorted.

That was it. Both of us couldn't stop. Every time I calmed enough to think I could speak, one look at Liam's face, and I'd be off again.

Eventually, we stopped, and I was able to say, "Oh my God, your face! That was so bloody funny." I wiped my eyes.

"I think that may have been the first time someone's done that to me."

"Really? Didn't you go to an all-boys school?"

"Yes, but it wasn't the US." Liam tried suppressing a grin as he said, "we got ball taps."

I tried not to laugh. I really did. "Oh, my God!" I was off again.

We watched the original Mad Max before I had to go and finish dinner. I was horrified when Liam said he hadn't seen it before. I immediately made him watch it. He said it was ok, the concept was great, but he didn't love it. I told him he needed a brain scan.

When I went to make dinner, Liam offered to help, but I told him not to be silly.

Liam sat at the kitchen bench chatting to me while I chopped and blanched the vegetables. After a while, he said he had to call Sarah and his assistant Ryan to make sure he had organised the dog walker to take Cole for a walk and play.

"Any update from Sarah?" I asked Liam when he returned. I feigned disinterest while I finished slicing the roast.

"All the same right now. Some sites have posted the pictures, saying I was spotted drinking with an "unknown female companion." The pictures have circulated a bit on Twitter, but it's mostly just by fans. They haven't hit the mainstream yet. It's all fairly standard, and it will go away by tomorrow by the looks of it."

"Good," I said. A look I couldn't interpret passed over Liam's face. He masked it pretty quickly. I opened my mouth to ask if he was ok but shut it again. I said, instead, "dinner's ready." I passed Liam his plate.

"Thank you," Liam said, leaning over to kiss me before eating. I watched as he cut up some beef and started chewing. "Pretty good. Almost as good as Mum's," he teased with a wink.

I elbowed him, and God bless him; he pretended it hurt.

We ate in silence for a while. I gave a few pieces to Perrin. He was so old, and I couldn't help but spoil him occasionally. He won't be around forever.

After dinner, Liam insisted on helping me clean up, and we stacked the dishwasher. Watching him bend over, his jeans straining as he put the plates in, stirred some feelings. Erotic feelings.

"Want to watch another movie?" He asked.

"Not really," I said. "I'm in the mood for some dessert."

"Ice-cream? I can't have any, but you can."

"Not ice-cream," I said, shaking my head. I looked at him with my very best bedroom eyes.

"What do you want then? Want me to go to the shops?" He said, not catching on. I put my arms around his waist. "If you let me borrow your car, I'll go. I can just go on my own."

"No, you wombat." I met his hips with mine, his eyes widened. "What I want is right here." I wriggled against him. Liam grinned widely, his cheeks creasing in such a sexy way.

"I thought you were shy."

"I am getting used to you," I said. "The real me is coming out." The truth of my words took me by surprise. I looked away, second-guessing myself. Why did I do that?

"I like her," Liam said hoarsely. If he hadn't spoken then, I think I would have stopped. But when his hands went into my hair, and he pulled, stretching my throat, I knew I wasn't going to stop. He kissed me there, and his teeth grazed my skin. My fingers reached under his shirt, and they gripped his back. My nails dug into his skin.

"Bedroom?" I whispered.

"Bedroom," he agreed and walked me backwards to my room.

"You promised me something earlier today," Liam said in between kisses. We were close to my bed.

"What's that?"

He stopped kissing me and cupped my face with his hands. "You said I could undress you."

Liam took hold of my t-shirt and waited. I nodded. He slowly lifted my shirt up and over my head before dropping it to the ground. He tilted his head as if contemplating and gently turned me around.

I felt Liam gather my hair and put it over my shoulder. He caressed my back with his fingertips, making me shiver with pleasure. I heard him give a satisfied hum before undoing my bra. He turned me around again and took hold of my bra straps, pulling them down my arms.

When I dropped my bra beside my shirt, Liam took a step back. He looked me up and down, his eyes hungry. I wanted to cover myself under his intense gaze, my earlier courage wavering under his scrutiny.

My arms started to move, and he gave me a stern look. "You're not thinking of hiding now, are you?"

I shook my head and forced my arms back by my sides. "Good, because I want to look. You're quite the sight." As if to emphasise his point, he adjusted himself through his pants. I felt a thrill of excitement flow through me and felt the familiar throbbing between my legs.

Liam got down on his knees and kissed my belly. His rough stubble tickled. "Your skin is so soft," he said in a low voice. He undid my jeans and kissed a trail down as he unzipped me. His breath was warm, and I felt it through the cotton of my briefs, his last kiss placed just above my slit.

It was almost agony. I moaned at his teasing breath and lips. Then Liam pulled down my underwear and kissed my mound. I felt his tongue part my lips, and when he found what he was looking for, he flattened his tongue and moaned into me.

I didn't know what to do. For a moment, I wanted to stop Liam, but it felt too good. I could feel my resolve waning. I didn't want to wait. Why should we wait? What was I waiting for? I had to stop thinking and go with it, enjoy him, enjoy the experience. I put my fingers in his hair as he licked and sucked at me. He seemed to remember what I liked, and soon I was close to my peak.

One of his fingers played at my entrance. I silently begged for Liam to put it in. My core was desperate to be filled. His finger slowly entered me, and I was lost. I needed him. At that moment, all I wanted was to feel more of him inside me, have him fill me.

I felt like this was the moment. If I don't ask Liam now, I probably never would. If I didn't want him now, why am I even allowing this to happen? I wanted him. He excited me like no one had done since Andy. He had knocked down the defences I'd built to keep myself alone. Keep me in my grief and guilt. I didn't want to be alone anymore. I wanted to feel desired again.

"Fuck me?" I asked. The words just tumbled out. I knew at that moment I would beg if I had to. "Please, Liam, I want you to fuck me."

I wasn't sure if Liam heard me. He increased his attention, and I felt the pressure building. His hand gripped my arse, his fingers digging into my cheeks as he pulled me closer to him. The short rough hair on his cheeks and chin tickled against my thighs. My legs buckled. I couldn't stand up anymore. He held me there while I panted and moaned, seeking release.

I felt my climax arrive like a bolt of lightning. It was sudden and intense. My body contracted as waves of pleasure exploded over me. Short, wordless shouts came from my mouth until it was over. I collapsed onto the bed.

I laid there a while, eyes closed, trying to catch my breath. Liam was shuffling around and heard his belt come undone. I felt the bed dip, and I opened my eyes to find Liam naked, climbing up the bed until his face was above mine.

Liam supported some of his weight with one hand and laid on me, our whole bodies skin to skin. He was warm to touch, and he almost felt hot to my now cooled skin.

"Ask me again," Liam said.

Part 8

#original story #original fiction #romantic story

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the-overgrowth · 4 years

Text

Retrospective: “Faybane” #1

This is where it all started, on July 8th, 2016. Although probably a bit earlier than that, but this is the earliest thing I can find that’s actually written down, so that’s what counts. And back in the day I didn’t let ideas marinate the way I do now, I just started writing pretty much as soon as I got the idea.

Anyway, the document was created at this point in time according to Google Docs, and was last modified in October 3rd, 2016. It’s only 3 chapters long, plus one incomplete fourth chapter, and the whole thing is about 17k words.

Which is a lot for 3 chapters. I would say something about how I’m less wordy now, but the latest draft is like 107k words long, so, like, I will always struggle with shutting the fuck up, methinks.

Also, the reason this is called “Faybane” is because that was the working title I used, and the name of this document. I thought it’d be the proper title but like. It’s bad lmao.

Anywhomst, let’s get into it!

Some background info for those who are new or need a refresher: this WIP became a thing after I read and was disappointed by A Court of Thorns and Roses by SJM, as well as The Iron King by Julie Kagawa and some book by Holly Black, was it Tithe?

ACOTAR was the biggest culprit. I feel that this is important to keep in mind as we go through this mess.

We open on Sidra in the forest with a bunch of men she calls a hunting party. It’s clear she doesn’t want to be there, but since she’s the only decent hunter among them and it’s her sister’s wedding today, she has to make the kill to feed the people attending said wedding.

This is, as the kids say, big stupid, and seems like a very ill-prepared celebration? I guess it makes some sense for them to want fresh meat, but this fresh? What if they didn’t find anything? What if they didn’t manage to kill anything? Is the whole thing cancelled? Stupid.

We find out they’ve been hunting a boar and that this dude named Liam, our Gaston replacement, previously wounded the animal but didn’t kill it, causing it to flee and force the hunting party to follow. It’s up to Sidra to make the killing blow, which she does with an arrow straight into its head. This was back when Sidra was still YA Heroine Extraordinaire and the time period was Vaguely Medieval, I guess.

They begin taking their quarry back home and Sidra thinks about how she normally doesn’t hunt this close to the “Faewilds” because animals closer to the border are said to be bigger and more violent. There isn’t an actual border, people just had to rely on intuition and not wander too far into the forest.

She also mentions a girl named Wilda, who disappeared fairly recently and everyone suspects it was the fae. This isn’t relevant now, but Wilda will return in later drafts, I think.

Everybody, especially my family, knew that I was one of the best archers in town, whether I used a bow or a crossbow.

Shut up, Not!Feyre. Nobody likes you.

I should mention that at this point I didn’t bother googling how big wild boars get and just assumed they were the size of like, a thick medium dog. Which is, if you know how big boars are, very incorrect. Four men pulling the animal seems realistic enough, but then Liam just lifts it up on his own? Not buying it.

Sidra laments how much she hates Liam and we find out that he apparently tried to assault her and she stabbed him? And apparently she’s not happy about his marriage to Sinéad but can’t do anything about it because “Father’s word is law” and Sinéad herself laughed it off when Sidra tried to warn her?

Yeah, gonna call bullshit on that one. No idea why this was here or what purpose it serves, the reason Liam doesn’t exist in the latest draft is because I never figured out what his purpose was so I axed him entirely.

Current!Sidra would just kill him the moment he showed an interest in Sinéad, and Current!Sinéad would 100% believe her sister about something like that.

Some bloke named Connor strikes up a conversation with Sidra, seemingly worried about being this far away from human civilization. Liam teases him about it and calls the fae “knife-ears”, because I still had brainrot back then and liked Dragon Age and had zero original ideas in my head.

The men make jokes about having sex with fae women and Sidra seems so disturbed by this that she nocks an arrow. This isn’t the first time she makes references to feeling unsafe around these men, I have no idea why I wrote it this way aside from being edgy, I guess.

My village was mostly populated by men, and even though I wasn’t one of the pretty girls there, I knew these men weren’t picky, even with all their talk about beautiful fae women. I’d heard that fae women would kill their men after sleeping with them. I had no way of know it was true, but a part of me hoped it was and that Liam would some day soon get “lucky” and encounter a female fae, so she could end his misery.

Edgy, dude.

They eventually arrive and Sidra goes inside her house, which is a simple cottage with three rooms. I think her family are all farmers? It’s kind of confusing. She goes into her and Sinéad’s bedroom, where Sinéad is preparing for her wedding. Also, she’s blonde.

“Sid! There you are!” she said cheerily. “Killed a boar, huh? Good on Liam for taking all the credit.”

If you know your man is trash, why are you marrying him?

Apparently Liam seduced Sinéad with sweets and baked goods. I mean ... fair enough. Considering how Sidra complains about being hungry and skinny and going without food if she doesn’t kill the boar because this year’s harvest was minimal, I’m assuming y’all are starving.

We find out Sinéad’s mother doesn’t let her do anything around the house or farm, to preserve her “soft and white” hands and pale complexion so she could be married off easily. This makes zero sense, you’d think these medieval men wouldn’t have the same beauty standards as Victorian England, plus having a mouth to feed that doesn’t even help feeding itself is just nuts.

But remember, this isn’t Sidra, this is Not!Feyre. She needs to be sad and put-upon and a victim. She explains how she was never pretty to begin with and thus nobody considered her to be worthy of marrying off, which then meant she was put to work and became even less attractive because now she was so cool and badass that all the men were intimidated by her.

Yeah, in a village that already doesn’t have a lot of young women? I’m not buying this, lmao. But go off, Not!Feyre.

I’d been the one helping around, instead. Hunting, mostly. Sometimes I’d chop wood or work the farm. Marrying out of the house seemed impossible. Marrying up was practically a dream you forgot upon waking. Had I been pretty from the start there would’ve been a foundation to work from, but I was a lost cause even before my skin became tan and my hands grew veined and calloused. I had freckles which people mistook for mud and dull brown eyes, a long nose that had been broken one time too many and a mouth that made it look like I constantly felt a bad smell no matter what facial expression I made. I’d always been of rather short stature and had brown hair and thick eyebrows, which in combination with everything else made my parents call me their “little goblin”. The scar on my face didn’t help me either: men didn’t like it when their women were more battle-hardened than they were.

Oh god please, don’t go off! We don’t care! Stop going off!

Also what fucking parents call their poor kid a goblin? Yikes.

Sinéad convinces Sidra to get prettied up and Sidra is all “oh I bet all the men will just fall over themselves for my favor now huh” which is just the most annoying fucking thing, prompting Sinéad to respond:

“Well, winter is coming and game is scarce. If they want to survive, marrying the best hunter in the village might be a good bet.”

Yeah! This is correct! I refuse to believe people wouldn’t be into Sidra! Not only does everyone apparently know she’s the best hunter in town, but Sidra herself confirmed the men here outnumber the women and aren’t very picky.

This is fucking stupid. I’m glad I axed it. In my defense, I was very much trying to emulate the YA shit I’d read so far.

Sidra’s grandmother enters the stage. She’s very old in this draft, but otherwise unchanged.

She was a short and wrinkled old lady with extremely bad vision and an even worse grasp on reality. Or maybe an extremely acute grasp on reality, depending on whether you believed her stories or not.

Sidra changes out of the dress again to go out and help her father prepare the boar, all while sulking.

I didn’t envy Sinead, nor any other bride. Despite what most people thought of me, I wasn’t some poor ugly girl longing for the love of a man and the security of marriage. Did I enjoy the idea of having somebody care for me? Sure. But it wasn’t on my list of priorities. I was still trying to figure out what actually was on that list. Not that it mattered. The prospects for a poor village girl were very finite.

Womp womp.

We get some confusing and barely related stuff about Sidra possibly becoming a royal hunter for the king and also about where the village is located in relation to the Faewilds. She speculates that maybe the fae aren’t real, but the way she and everyone else talks about them makes it pretty obvious that they are? This was supposed to build mystery, I guess.

We skip forward to the wedding and Sidra is moping again.

“How are you feeling?” Father asked and squeezed my shoulder.

I wasn’t sure why he was doing that. I assumed it had something to do with the wedding and the fact that despite there being fewer women than men here, I was still not asked to dance. Though this didn’t really bother me, so I just shrugged.

“It doesn’t bother me. Anyway I will continue to mope and feel bitter about this thing that doesn’t bother me.” Hunny ...

At least Current!Sidra has the self-awareness to admit she’s sad and lonely.

[Father’s] marriage to Sinead’s mother was never out of love, more out of necessity. It was easier when you had a big family.

Except for when this “big family” is 3 people who work and 2 people who are just being fed, right? See, I knew back then that having a big family helps when you have a farm, but I also needed to make Sidra Special so Sinéad had to sit on her ass to highlight how pretty and feminine she was or whatnot.

Bleh.

They talk a bit about Sidra’s mother, who passed away five years ago, and Sidra reminisces about how she used to tell amazing stories. It’s all very ... whatever, and serves only to make this point for the hundredth time:

I wasn’t like Mother. I wasn’t full of life and spirit like her. I wasn’t loved and respected by the entire village like her. I was just her disappointing child whose existence they’d rather forget except when they wanted something killed.

Right after this there’s a really abrupt scene transition. Nothing about the wedding coming to an end, nothing about her going to bed, it’s just ... some while later?

Sidra’s father comes back home from ??? and tells Sidra he saw a stag somewhere, but it was hours ago so she better get a move on.

I’m not sure what either of them thinks this will accomplish? Like ... what is she gonna do with it when she kills it ... Carry it home? On her little boney ass? Hmm? I guess I didn’t think of that because I had meta knowledge that she wouldn’t get it home either way, so who cares about logic, right?

Sidra kills two rabbits while stalking the deer, and despite telling us earlier that she doesn’t venture far away from human civilization and the boar hunting being the farthest she’d been and that she wouldn’t go this far alone, she has no issue dwelling very deep into the forest this time.

Like. Henlo? Can we have one logic please and thanks you? Granted, she keeps stopping every now and then to Feel Things Out, but this really goes against how careful she was before and at no point do we get an explanation to her sudden boldness. Plot reasons, I guess.

She nearly stumbles into fae territories and finally decides to head back, except when she starts returning, she sees the stag she’s been tracking. It’s abnormally huge and has a “dark brown” coat that she finds odd, but of course she’s too stupid to connect the dots.

She sneaks up on it and honestly? This chapter ending still slaps.

A scream of pain left the creature and I saw it topple. But though my arrow hit a deer, a man fell to the ground.

DUN DUN DUN.

And yeah, the ACOTAR roots rear their ugly heads again. I liked the idea of the protagonist shooting a fae disguised as an animal, but I decided to cut out the middleman and just have her obliterate Val right in chapter one. Don’t worry, he doesn’t die.

#retrospective #my writing

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thewritingamateur · 3 years

Note

🎁🔨 🖕 please and thank you!!

Thanks so much for the prompt! I had so much fun writing this and honestly, I might make a part two just to conclude what happens next! Hope you enjoy :)

Versace on the Floor (MCD Modern AU)

~~~

"Hayes, my boy! We did good tonight!"

Champagne glasses clinked together in the room full of suited men. The business deal went well. Hayes Enterprise now had global domination. It was something only the business wits of Levi 'Walker' Hayes was capable of.

His sleeves were rolled up, suit jacket thrown to the side as he drank his bubbly. It was a hard couple of months coming up with the best deal for his company and their Asian conglomerate. It was all for the better, though. He became close to the CEO of their business partner Nam Jung-woo, often having dinners and discussing topics of similar interest.

Needless to say, they've become chummy in their time together.

They were in a cocktail lounge, the renowned and revered King Cole Bar at the St.Regis hotel. It upheld the sophistication of the past hundred years while having a modern edge within the walls. Behind the men sitting on the barstools was the grand mural of King Cole bringing remembrance of the grand king from the old rhymes.

Like the merry soul, they were smoking cigars in victory.

After some cheer, there was silence as they downed the champagne. The only sound was the soft voice of a woman singing on the other side of the lounge.

Rolling his neck, Hayes was glad to finish with the tedious business deal. Now he could take the weekend off for himself. You can never really stop working for a day as a CEO, but at least he would be able to breathe and do whatever he wanted for a couple of hours.

And boy, did he have some ideas in mind.

He watched his shorter but equally as handsome business partner take a smoke, blowing out rings.

"You know, I'll miss working with you, Hayes. You're cutthroat and know what you want. I need more men like you in my circle."

The taller man smirked, taking a smoke of his own, "Likewise Nam. Let's hope we have more business dealings in the future." It was bound to happen. If Hayes Enterprise was going to hold into its top spot without question, he had to stick with Jung-woo.

"Maybe you can come down to Korea, and I'll show you the amenities we have to offer. For now, though, I have other ways of showing you a token of my gratitude."

Thick brows knitted together in confusion, watching his friend walk out of the room for a moment. His ears perked, hearing the pretty voice from the dark corner of the room, but he couldn't see the woman's face.

The melody was light in her voice, soft and sweet, parallel to the ambiance of the room.

By giving me all you got

Your love has captured me

Lost in the sweet words, Hayes didn't take notice of his friend's reentrance, with some special guests.

Before him, thirty women of all creeds and shapes lined up. Blue eyes watched all the women dressed up in sexy lace lingerie. He feasted on the display before him.

"As a gift, my friend, I am offering you any woman you see here before you now. You can do like you to her, whether that would be just for the night or for as long as you like. Please, take your pick."

Walker gave slow steps assessing all the women before him. They all gave sultry eyes, some touching him as an act of enticement. It seemed that all were willing to bend to his will.

Even if they had no clue what that would be.

His lips stretched in a sly smirk seeing the enticing curves of each woman. They were all tempting in their own right, but none good enough to fulfill the desires he had.

By the end of the line, he shared a smug look with Jung-woo before his ears tuning in to the sweet melody once again.

Needing you more and more

Let's give love a try

Hypnotized by the voice, he walked towards the dark corner where the band players were.

With the snap of his fingers, the light shone brightly over the band. A dainty hand rose to cover the unknown face of the singer.

Her skin was pale, creamy in tone. The lace and silk dress clung onto her slim yet shapely form, small shoulders exposed for his viewing.

Dark hair was up in a messy low bun. Wispy bangs flew on her face. When her hand went down, he saw her dark eyes, an abyss of wonder shining forth. Her petite nose was up. Supple lips painted red.

Her eyes weren't on him, and his blood boiled. All the other females in the room were still staring him down, all willing to give him the attention a woman ought to give a man, to show their sexual prowess ready to bend to his command.

Thick fingers went to rub his lips, staring the girl down before she finally acknowledged his presence.

Who was she to not take notice of him?

Her pretty eyes only looked at him for a moment, like he was just another person in the room for her to sing to.

"Her."

"What?" His friend came towards him, eventually also watching the girl before them.

"I want her."

The nervous laugh from the shorter man was not what was needed. "Well, Hayes, I meant from the women we provided over there. She-she's just a singer that was hired."

Gritting his teeth, he turned to his business partner, "You said I could have any woman I want, to do as I please with." He pointed towards the girl, "I want her."

Amid his command, the girl stopped singing. He was close enough for her to hear, and now there was fear running through her blood. The band also stopped playing for the moment.

Jung-woo sighed. He gave a brief gaze towards the girl on the stage. His father warned him about Walker Hayes. He's a man who gets what he wants, regardless of the methods to obtain it.

Without much choice, he nodded. "Alright, just give me a minute."

He rounded up the other women to leave the room, pulling the small woman from the stage along with him.

Walker was conversing with the other men for a while, waiting for his prize.

He didn't receive it until the end of the night.

With everyone long gone, he went to his floor with a pissed mindset. Did his friend break his word?

Tapping his foot impatiently, he watched as two figures walked towards his room. Mr. Nam was dragging the girl down the hall.

She was feisty.

Perfect.

Her eyes were full of anger watching his friend with hateful eyes. Lips twisted in a frown as she tried to pull out of the grip.

"As promised, here she is." She was thrown to the larger form of Walker Hayes, the famous businessman who was awarded Entrepreneur of the Year by Forbes magazine only a month prior.

He held onto her tightly by the waist, not giving her the ability to make a fast run for it. Fear made a home in the pit of her stomach as the famed businessman's nose dove into her hair, taking in the scent of her strawberry shampoo.

Fingers bit into her waist.

"It's time to take my leave. I'll see you soon, Hayes." The two men shared a firm handshake before the shorter man left.

He pulled her into the grand hotel room, decorated with modern furniture within the spacious area. There were dark blue undertones against the gold. The night expanded along the big glass windows giving a full view of the nightlife in the city.

The young girl was still donned in her outfit, the slinky silk she borrowed from her friend.

Her eyes watched as he locked the door, starting to pull his tie off as his eyes dance on her form. Legs tremble in the tall heels, her ankle twisting as she tried to walk backward. She wasn't used to this get-up.

Lust filled his dark blue gaze seeing the terror in her doll eyes.

"P-please. I don't know what this is, but this is a mistake. I-I'm not what you think I am."

A mirthless laugh escaped him, "That's what you all say. Always trying to be coy and innocent until it's time to get down to it."

"No, I am not a whore." Tears rolled down her soft cheeks as she kept walking back, and he never failed to move forward.

Jenny was only covering for a friend that night. She needed the money, and a night as the St.Regis Hotel was bound to give her a good payday. That, and nothing else.

She should've known it was too good to be true. She knew his eyes were on her from earlier in the night, no doubt like the sound of her voice. She thought she was free after seeing the women before him earlier.

Why did he choose her in the end?

Her back hit the wall, and he crushed her with his large frame. Thick fingers went to her slim throat, encircling it with a mild grip.

"Methinks the lady doth protests too much."

She didn't look him in the eyes, but her voice was still strong. "That's wrong."

"What?"

With a little courage on her side, she responded, "The line is, 'The lady doth protests too much, methinks'. What you said is wrong."

She gasps, feeling his fingers tighten around her throat, looking into his angry eyes.

"What are you, a smartass? Don't try to get one over me, you stupid bitch."

Strong arms flung her to the floor. She struggled to catch her breath.

She crawled away on her knees, wanting nothing more than to leave with her dignity intact.

"Where are you going?" He pulled her back from the hair, her bun becoming loose. Long hair tumbled over her shoulders, a cry escaped her lips.

He pulled her backward, back hitting the floor as he climbed on top of her. Her chest moved in hasty breaths as he pulled her arms above her head, holding both of her small wrists in one of his hands.

"Let go!" She struggled to move, fighting against him as he tried to keep her legs down.

The slap echoing in the room was enough to put her in a momentary daze. Her cheek became red. The hit was hard enough to cause a bruise.

Using his silk tie, Walker tied her hands together behind her back. Tears decorated her cheeks. Her smudged lips trembled from his heavy gaze.

Maybe they needed to slow down for a moment. He pulled her up and pushed her to the bedroom. She fell on the large, plush bed only a few could afford.

"What's your name?" Her brows creased, wondering why he suddenly wanted to know, but the impatient look on his face gave her little time to wonder.

"Jenny. Jenny Lee."

"Well, Jenny- pretty name- who are you? Not every prostitute knows Shakespeare off the top of their head."

"As I said, I'm not a whore."

"Let me be the judge of that." His arms crossed to show off his biceps, standing above her with his shadow overcasting her.

"I'm a college student, an English major. Knowing Shakespeare is a given for that field. I'm only here covering for a friend. She's the one usually singing."

She watched his unknown expression, knowing there's a possibility he wouldn't believe her.

Walker watched the big eyes of the girl before him, innocence radiating off her. He knew she was telling the truth. She was too scared to lie to him.

A woman of class, how nice.

He watched the dip of hidden cleavage rising under her dress, the blood rushing down him from the thoughts of taking her right in the room.

"Please, let me go. I won't tell anyone what happened, I promise. I don't want your money. I want to go home."

Sobs filled the room as he watched her turmoil.

Did she detest him so much that she wanted to leave without asking for compensation? Did she want to forget him so quickly, the most sought out bachelor of the past five years?

He moved on top of her, strong hands-on ether side of her small form. She watched his cruel eyes fill with amusement.

"That's the thing, Miss Lee. You're mine now. My friend promised me any woman I wanted in that room, and here you are. Now, be a good girl and don't fight too much."

His fingers danced on her collarbone, eliciting a gasp from her pretty lips.

As a last attempt, Jenny did something she never expected herself to do.

Her mouth moved before she had time to think it through.

Another slap was on her face as he wiped the spit off his face. How dare she?

Her fighting him started to become a bit tiring.

Angry and filled up with all the stress that burdened him for months, he finally let it all go.

Cries were heard throughout the large suite as his fists went down on her.

Strikes were on her face, her stomach, and her chest. She gasped for air as she knocked the wind out of her. Her heels broke as he slammed her to the floor again, this time kicking her down with his leather shoes.

"Stop!" The was the only word leaving her lips for minutes straight, each time becoming a bit more straggled than the last. Blood flooded out of her lips. Her left eye started to form a dark bruise when he punched her face.

"You stupid bitch." A punch for every word. His kicks were hard, stepping on her at one point to show his authority.

Her body battered, she did not fight when he decided to pick up her limp body, pulling her through to the main room and slamming her onto the glass window.

"Why don't we give someone a show?" His strong fingers pulled her dress off like a piece of paper. Next was her lace bra and panties. Her body was pressed onto the glass, open for the viewing of many below them.

He pulled off his shirt, rushing to take off his pants as his body burned for the release he desperately needed.

She gave a strangled gasp as he forcefully entered her dry walls, ripping her apart. He pulled her tied up arms above her head as he wrapped her legs around him, hips meeting in harsh thrusts.

Walker eventually let her arms free, knowing she wouldn't fight him anymore.

Her hands wrapped around his broad shoulders, scared to fall in his fast pace.

No thoughts came to her mind as he had his rough ministrations.

Her body violated, blood mixing with his fluid.

Jenny cried into his shoulders, salty tears mingling with sweat.

"Don't cry. I know you like it." His hands encircled her small waist as he went slower, drawing out the ordeal.

He made sure she released before he did, her legs quaking as she rode off her high. Walker soon came after, his seed overflowing outside her small hole.

But it wasn't over, far from it.

By morning, she was sore and out of it. With the bruises all over her body and the energy taken from her, Jenny was tired. Her eyes closed before dawn, and she woke up to the fragrance of scrumptious foods.

Her eye still swollen, she struggled to open them as she saw Walker Hayes's tall body with a plate of food in front of her.

"I thought it would be best to order some breakfast. You'll need the energy again for later." Her gut reeled at the thoughts of what he had in store for her.

She was hungry, and it did smell good.

Digging in, she didn't take notice of his stare as she scarfed the food.

"For someone so small, you have quite the appetite." His hand went towards her face.

Out of instinct, she pulled back, but he only wanted to remove a piece of food hanging on the corner of her lips, eating it instead.

Her cheeks turned red from the intimate action.

Swallowing her food, she started back with her pleads.

"Please, Mr.Hayes. I-I need to go home now."

He frowned at her words.

"Did you learn nothing last night? You belong to me now. Wherever I am will be your new home."

He got up, still naked from the previous night's excursions, retrieving an object from the desk draw.

Her pale skin turned paperwhite, seeing what it was.

A leather choker with an emerald gem hanging in the middle.

Her fingers were quick to hide whatever was at hand.

Walker hooked the necklace on her slim throat, satisfied with the look.

Small fingers turned the gem around.

Property of W.Hayes

Tears fell, seeing what he said was finally coming to pass.

She belonged to him.

He kissed the side of her jaw, moving toward her lips. They were warm on hers, using teeth to bit down on her supple lips.

Hands were quick to grope her breasts, tugging on her as his lips moved down to her neck, marking his territory.

At the moment, he was lost in her body.

Now was her time to strike.

Using full force, she pulled the knife from under her and aimed it at his face.

A pained grunt escaped him, his hand covering his face in pain.

He had no time to stop her from running, mind on the profuse amount of blood on his hands. He couldn't see out of his left eye. His lips were ripped open.

All Walker saw was her naked body running.

Jenny picked up the remainder of her clothes, nothing salvageable. Panicked, she picked up his discarded shirt and pulled it on. She didn't care if people saw her running out like this.

Her focus was to escape, to run back to her home.

"Get back here!" She heard his footsteps coming towards her, but she was out the door.

She ran towards her freedom beyond the lavish walls of the hotel.

Beyond the clutches of the man, she didn't realize became infatuated with her.

Walker fell on the floor, the pain on his face overtaking him. He went towards the hotel phone, calling an emergency and his assistant.

Even in his pain, there was one thing he knew for sure.

He was going to get her back. It wasn't the end for Jenny Lee just yet.

That, he promised.

#asks #prompts #whump #au #jenny lee #walker hayes #major whump #original writing #original fiction

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teaandgames · 4 years

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The Tea Times - May 2020

Normally, I’d use this little intro box to joke about the events in the news in a lighthearted we’re-all-gonna-die kind of a way, but that doesn’t really feel right at the moment. It’s been a very charged month, with the virus and injustice making the rounds. I hope everyone is keeping safe while they fight for what’s right.

On the games side of things, it's been a little threadbare on the news front, as tends to be the way as we move into summer. Things should hopefully pick up next month with things like the IGN Summer of Gaming kicking in. Oh and if you’re wondering what happened to April’s news, then I forgot. Simple as that. Whoops.

At a Glance

Mafia II and III: Definitive Editions, Maneater, Minecraft Dungeons and Shantae and the Seven Sirens released.

Paper Mario: The Origami King, Sherlock Holmes Chapter One, Blue Fire announced.

Yakuza: Like A Dragon is coming to PC!

Pyramid Head breaks his way into Dead by Daylight!

Rumour mill: The Simpsons: Hit and Run!

Blizzcon officially cancelled!

Ubisoft taking on Apple and Google!

The Releases

A big chunk of the releases in May were remasters or games that had otherwise been packaged together. I wouldn’t normally talk about them but there has been quite a lot of buzz about the definitive editions of Mafia II and Mafia III. I’ve played Mafia II and enjoyed my time with it but I wouldn’t say it was due a definitive edition ten years later but here we are. Unfortunately, the definitive editions have been plagued with performance issues. If you want to wade in yourself, then the Definitive Editions hit Windows, PlayStation 4 and Xbox on the 19th May.

From the mobsters of the real world to the mobsters (probably) of the sea: sharks. If you’ve ever felt you have too few teeth and wondered how human beings taste, then give Maneater a whirl and possibly seek therapy. Maneater pits you as a shark in a vicious battle of revenge against the hunter who killed your mother. A lot of innocent people will die in the process but that’s nature, baby. It was released on Windows, PlayStation 4 and Xbox One on the 22nd May and will release on the Switch later this year.

One of more highly anticipated releases this month was Minecraft Dungeons, the isometric hack’n’slash set in the Minecraft world. Honestly, I didn’t really believe it was an actual game up until release but it is. It seems to be as fun and chill as Minecraft is but with less crafting and more hitting things. One to break out with friends, methinks. If it’s your bag, it was released on PC, Switch, PlayStation 4 and Xbox One on May 26th.

I never had much to do with the Shantae series but it clearly struck a note with people because we’re now on to the fifth game in the series, Shantae and the Seven Sirens. Technically it’s been out since last year but on mobile devices and in parts by the look of it. Bit odd, but the whole package is now out if you fancy some more platforming, transforming and… dancing I guess. It came to PC, Xbox One, PlayStation 4 and the Switch on May 28th 2020.

The Announcements

In a fairly shocking turn of events, Nintendo announced Paper Mario: The Origami King, which was surprising enough but more than that, it’s coming as early as July 17th. Funnily enough, it features an origami twist as Mario characters are folded into new and interesting shapes. It’s not that unusual for Nintendo to pull this kind of move but I wouldn’t have thought that Paper Mario would have that kind of draw anymore. Still, my fingers are crossed that this is going to be a return to form following the failure lacklustre Sticker Star and (reportedly) Colour Splash. The trailer maybe hints at some turn based stuff! Here’s hoping!

For those that like a mystery, then you may like Sherlock Holmes: Chapter One. It seems that the biggest mystery of all, Sherlock himself, is about to be unravelled. Presumably anyway, I never really had much of a dalliance with the deerstalker detective. Still, the Sherlock Holmes series has gained a firm reputation over the years and Chapter One is still in the reliable hands of Frogware. It will be out in 2021.

On the prettier side of things, there’s Blue Fire. It’s a heavily Zelda inspired game about trekking across a desolated kingdom, poking your nose into all of its secrets. It has a nice clean artstyle, reminiscent of something like A Hat in Time, with some slashy combat on top. It looks pretty good, though I’m less keen on the shadow monster enemy design. It should be coming out this summer.

Dragon Itself To PC!

The Yakuza series has been unfortunately tied to the PlayStation for quite some time now. While the first few in the series have been remastered for PC, entries three to seven are still PlayStation exclusive. My ways of knocking people out with bowls of noodles are severely limited. Hopefully, however, there’s now a bit more light at the end of the tunnel.

The latest in the series, Yakuza: Like A Dragon, will now be coming to PC. It specified Windows 10 but it should hopefully be supported by all operating systems. Like A Dragon is peculiar in that it is turn based, unlike the action focus the rest of the series has, but seems to maintain the madcap vibe. I’m hoping it sells like hotcakes, so SEGA will have more incentive to release the rest of the Yakuza series on PC. It should be out later this year either way.

Unexpected Pyramid Head

If I made a news piece about everyone that got added to Dead by Daylight then you would get mighty sick of it. In this case though, someone notable has been added: Pyramid Head from the Silent Hill series. The physical representation of the protagonist from Silent Hill 2’s irrepressible sexual desires. He’s evolved beyond that nowadays though, arguably being the face (of sorts) of the survival horror genre. Maybe it was only a matter of time until he was absorbed into Dead by Daylight’s roster.

What is notable about this is that the Silent Hill series has been pretty firmly closed. After the much anticipated Silent Hills fell through, so Konami could focus on making pachinko machines and burning money, the series has been stagnant. Let's be honest, it was pretty rough times before that with games like Silent Hill: Homecoming but PT gave us all hope. Having Pyramid Head suddenly appear in the public eye is a bit odd.

He’ll be released next month. His skillset seems to be around map manipulation as he drags his big old sword along the ground. He can also put people in the Cage of Atonement, which is a special hook. Sounds nice.

Rumour Mill: Hitting and Running

Originally there were two rumours this month but then Like A Dragon got confirmed so that leaves us with just the one: The Simpsons: Hit and Run may be getting a remaster. It’s a much beloved game, for good reason as it allows people to Grand Theft Auto their way across The Simpsons world. A remaster for PC and modern day consoles would go down a treat, seeing as The Simpsons still seems to be going strong.

Of course, this should be taken with a grain of salt. Actually, seeing as the rumour came from just a reddit post you can take it with a giant truckload of salt. Still, it would be nice. The same post also comments on a new entry in the Sleeping Dogs series (which would be fantastic), the Far Cry series, Tomb Raider and, rather unfortunately, Just Cause 5. Hopefully they’ve learned a few things on that one.

Oh and Mad Max II, which would be pretty sweet given how the first one was kind of swept under the rug.

Blizzcon Is Blizz-gone

Blizzard’s big convention, Blizzcon, will not be happening this year. As news goes, it’s not particularly revolutionary but it is still sad to see. I know a lot of people would have been looking forward to getting together with likeminded people and playing some games together as well as seeing what’s going on inside the Blizzard skunkworks.

They’re looking into online ways of contacting people, so at least something of the convention can carry on but I’m afraid you’ll likely have to wait until next year if you were hoping to meet up with some friends.

A Legal Assissination

Here’s something that I wasn’t expecting. Ubisoft, purveyors of the finest assassinations and less than fine game clients, are taking on the twin giants of Apple and Google. Sounds like a bit of a self-assassination to me but you’ve got to protect your IP somehow I suppose. The issue surrounds Rainbow Six Siege, Ubisoft’s immensely popular online tactical shooter. A group called Alibaba created a game called “Area F2” which seems to be a straight rip-off of Rainbow Six Siege. Right down to the menu icons by the look of it.

Ubisoft’s lawsuit is therefore directed at Apple and Google for allowing Area F2 to be sold in their stores. It looks like a pretty legitimate claim to be honest, as that’s plagiarism to a laughable degree. Ubisoft did notify them by the sounds of it but they haven’t done anything about it. Best keep an eye on this storm as it develops.

That’s all for May, see you in June!

#Paper Mario #The Origami King #Simpsons Hit And Run #far Cry #Tomb Raider #Mad Max II #Minecraft Dungeons #Mafia II #Mafia III #Just Cause 5 #Sherlock Holmes #Shantae #Maneater #Yakuza Like A Dragon #Gaming #The Tea Times #Tea And Video Games

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