#it was so dysfunctional and anybody calling it out has a good reason to feel that way

[thoughtspresso]

Hello, sorry I just need someone to voice my op to since none of my circles read or watch OnK :'(

It's so weird to me how Akane's fans interpret that scene when the girls are filming an MV as Akane only having good intention and care for Kana, 'cuz imo even if there is, what she said was still one of her attemps to get Aqua to stay with her. Look at how things played out to her: her business bf wanted to break up, he even straight up refused sex when she offered, and now she found out that right after that he took Kana on to a proper date, Akane's chances were close to zero. She was grasping at straws when she said that and played it under the guise of being considerate about Kana's safety, just like how she said she's okay with breaking up with him yet cried - showing that she wanted the opposite. Because if she only cared about Kana's safety, then what's with the side comment about how actors have it easier? It's like she was saying "Choose me, I'm the safer choice!". I'm not saying Akane didn't have good intention, but it's more like a two bird one stone typa thing where she wanted Kana to be safe and Aqua to continue with dating her (her own selfish want). It was kinda a dirty move from Akane, consider how she knows very well what happened to Ai and how much that'll affects Aqua. Akane always strike me as a good in nature yet also self-absorbed character: She decided what's best for both Kana and Aqua that also benefits her selfish wants regardless of how the other two would feel (& we all know how miserable both Aqua and Kana was during that ghosting period); She decided what to do to Aqua's father without thinking about how he might feel (again); The signs were as early as the LoveNow arc where she tweeted the apology thinking it was the right solution without consulting with her manager first because she thought she knew what was best for her to do in that situation. Even her acting method also kinda reflect this, where if the character's portrayal clashes between her and the director/scriptwriter, she already has a concrete image of the character from her own interpretation and thus has difficulty compromising and adjusting with the production team.

I might even take a wild guess that she was in love (obsessed) with the idea of saving prince charming rather than Aqua himself because to her, their story literally went/was gonna go like the old classic story of prince charming saving the girl -> the girl learns about the prince's past, decides to help him to repay him saving her -> prince charming defeats the bad guy (his dad in this story) with the girl's help -> happily ever after. Akane being a teen + Aqua saved her + it's her first dating experience caused her to have an idealistic view of dating and probably why she tolerated Aqua dating her despite having his eyes on Kana for he did act like the perfect bf on the surface, and that to her was enough to fulfil her prince charming fantasy. Akane is, actually, not that mature in her relationship with Aqua like how her fan keep praising her for, tbh imo it's more akin to what teens think "being mature" is. I know this is one of the appeal of her ship with Aqua, even though some might deny it. As oppose to Kana who might be a potential obstacle to Aqua's revenge whether good or bad, Akane is narratively there as a bonus reward for Aqua after finishing the main quest of avenging his mom if the ship ever be canon again. Akane and Aqua have unfortunately became perfect self-inserts for those who are into revenge and/or trophy girl fantasy (nothing bad about this itself tho). But perhaps because of looking into those fantasy fulfilment rather than the actual context of the manga/anime, they accuse Kana of not understanding the "real" Aqua (I have alot to say about this, maybe 3 paragraphs at least lol) or how she's useless for not helping him kill a person and ignore the entire other half chunk of the story about showbiz problems, where Kana's own story entangle more.

If you've read this far, thank you so so much.

P/s: My wild guess no.2, rather than being a damsel in distress (being Kamiki's target) for Aqua to come rescue, Kana already has a close relationship with Kamiki prior to reuniting with the twins (maybe a mentor-student relationship?). I've always find it weird how Aka just glossed over Kana's past, like he's holding back important info regarding her past that he can't show the readers too soon. So that's why I have this guess. This explains why Aka's been keeping her out of the revenge plot for so long + better than Kana just being a damsel in distress + raises the stakes for Kana (will she choses the mentor who helped her through her dark days being abused by her mom or the twins who she can see the light and bright future in?) + makes Kana a key player in the revenge plot.

Hey Anon! I'm happy to talk to you about some OnK Character Analyses anytime. Sorry to have taken so long to respond, I really wanted to sit down with your question. I've been thinking about this a lot. And I'm afraid my response might be even longer than your ask hahaha!

I want to summarize your main points for everybody else, so that we're all on the same page:

Akane was manipulative when she reminded Aqua that Kana was an idol, and pushed him to choosing her.

Akane wants to reverse the damsel-in-distress and Prince Charming trope, and decides on behalf of others.

Akane fans accuse Kana for not knowing the "real" Aqua

(Bonus) There's a possibility that Kana already knew Hikaru Kamiki.

So, my responses:

#1 Was Akane being manipulative in Ch. 76?

Well, yes. And no.

I actually had a short discussion (argument?) with Skania (who I will not tag for the sake of their mental health, but mentioning here to credit them.) about this very topic. (And I want to thank them for their time and also apologize to have annoyed them!) We have really different interpretations and disagree each other on this part.

To get the fast answer out of the way: Yes, I believe Akane was wholly aware of what she was saying.

She already knew from the Tokyo Blade arc how badly Aqua can get triggered on the topic of Ai's death.

Put it this way: imagine being a teenage girl who was depressed or bullied, and the boy who saved your life started dating you but admits that it isn't because he likes you that way. You start offering him sex if that would fulfill his wants in a relationship, but he tells you that your relationship is about to end soon. You find out from another girl that they went on a date--shopping for suitcases and Brazilian barbecue--a kind of date he never did for you. Then when he invited you to go on a trip, most of what he did was walk you around his hometown to look for something else, and then watch this other girl be really cute in a dress he was stunned by.

Akane is allowed to be a teenager who would want to nudge her boyfriend to stay with her and away from his other crush.

Akane fans like to argue that she was being completely selfless, and was just looking out for Kana's safety too.

I really dislike this reading of Akane's character, because it strips her of agency. Of course she has personal goals, wants, and flaws. She's allowed to be a teenage girl who wanted her love to be reciprocated. She's allowed to be a teenage girl who gets a little jealous, and try as she might to be professional and civil because all of these people are her work colleagues too, she still does things that fulfill her goals. She is allowed to be self-interested, and act on opportunities that align with those self interests.

I also think that if Akane's fans want to believe in her intellect and her masterful ability in understanding people's psychology and detective work, then it stands to reason that they should also believe that Akane was deliberately aware of the effect of what she said to Aqua. She doesn't always make 100% correct bets, but it's reasonable to conclude she made this bet hoping that it could get him to stay.

Akane and everyone else is already aware that Kana is actually not a person who needs scolding on the dangers of being under public scrutiny:

Under any normal circumstance, if Akane simply cared for Kana's safety, she would have simply responded to Kana when she was bragging about the date. Like, "hey be careful about dating in public spaces okay? I dont want you getting in trouble." Or, if she would talk to Aqua about it, she might say, "Please remember to book a private room next time you eat in a restaurant."

But no. If Akane would remind them of safety tips of dating as public figures, it would just lead them to the advice to do Home Dates:

And she doesn't want that now, does she?

She didn't say something as straightforward as that, and neither did the author write it in a more neutral tone. It was deliberately written with Akane implying that if he didn't want Kana killed, he should just date a fellow actor. (Preferably one that the public is actually cheering on to be together, because they were already in a Love Team due to the show.)

I just don't like ignoring what the Author and the Illustrator clearly put on the page for me to absorb the way that it was. I think pretending she was being wholly selfless is an insult to the writers.

#2 Is Akane motivated by the want to Save Prince Charming?

This is the "and no" part of my answer.

When I think of Akane, I don't think of an outright evil person who manipulated Aqua into doing things, wanting to be a hero for that reason. And just like how Tokyo Blade serves as a parallel for the show, it in turn informs us that it is an incorrect interpretation of Saya-hime (or Akane) to think that she outright wants the violence herself.

This part I agree with Skania on: Akane's main flaw is her low self-esteem.

Akane doesn't personally believe that she is inherently worth any value, and any value that she holds is attributed to her hard work.

People have taken notice to the fact that, unlike Kana's experience of abuse and abandonment, Akane had a really good support system behind her when her suicide attempt happened during the LoveNow arc. She had a loving mother and a really kind-hearted manager that believed in her. Yet she clung onto the validation from the agency President more. She ascribes her personal value to the approval of other people, especially positive feedback from her superiors in the industry, her theater troupe calling her a genius, her fans applauding her.

And, on the opposite side of the same coin, she has immense Rejection Sensitivity that makes her extremely defensive when she received cyberbullying, leading her to want to make a public apology right away and appease people.

This leads Akane to be an extremely hardworking person, but also seeking validation and direction from other people (like the LoveNow crew), unable to voice out her views unless it is supported by an authority figure (like when she wanted something changed in Tokyo Blade), and also why when meeting her personal hero and idol Arima Kana in person, when Kana lashed out at her, instead of simply thinking, "okay she's a terrible person, I'm done with being her fan forever", she rejected that idea and went on to study Psychology in the hopes of understanding people like Kana.

All of this manifests in her relationship with Aqua being okay with receiving bare minimum from him, not complaining when she realizes he has feelings for someone else, and also doing anything and everything for him, whatever he needs whether he asks for it or not.

I'll go a little further into my interpretation of her (which I know Akane fans might be resistant to or disagree with, but I hope you stick with me here.)

I also think Akane has a co-dependency on Aqua, and herself has Inverted Narcissism, with Covert and Cerebral Subtypes.

I agree! I sound nuts! This interpretation is crazytown.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) has several subtypes, including Inverted Narcissism, which is a subtype where the person craves the co-dependency on another narcissist. They are self-sacrificing to their primary narcissist, feel they are not entitled to anything, but seem emotionally level-headed and highly attuned to the primary narcissist's needs but not much empathy for anybody else.

Because of how little they think of themselves, it gives them a feeling of power and control to be with a person who believes himself to be so special, to have a crucial mission whose victory she can partake in. In a sense, Aqua was someone Akane looked up to so much for having saved her from her suicide attempt, and for turning the public's view of her from negative to overwhelmingly popular.

Akane definitely thought, "I want to be useful to him! I want to make him happy!"

And this man had his own amazing detective mission going on in his mind and trauma to solve. And so Akane thinks, "Let me solve that for you! Let me be useful to you even if it kills me! Use me as you need!"

They say true love is unconditional and self-giving so I will aide my enabler in patricide to prove my worth to him!

According to Professor of Psychology Sam Vaknin, the DSM gives us 9 criteria to diagnose an Inverted Narcissist, and you need to have at least 5 to qualify. Here are some that he mentioned that I think fit Akane:

The inverted narcissist is emotionally stable, but her self-esteem is very low. The inverted narcissist devalues herself as an offering, as a sacrifice to the narcissist in her life. The inverted narcissist is compelled to filter all her narcissistic needs through the primary narcissist in her life. The inverted narcissist feels amplified by the primary narcissist's own accomplishments. The inverted narcissist is pre-occupied with fantasies [...] of an ideal love to be accomplished through the narcissistic partner.

The inverted narcissist feels like she is undeserving and not entitled to anything.

The inverted narcissist is indistinguishably selfless. She is sacrificial. She is anxious in her interpersonal relationships. She avoids assistance of others at all cost. She can only interact with others when she can be seen to be giving, supporting and expending an unusual effort to assist. So she is sacrificial, she sacrifices herself, but ostentatiously, in full view.

The inverted narcissist lacks empathy like a classic narcissist. She is intensely attuned to others needs, but only insofar as it relates to her own need to perform the required self sacrifice. She needs to self sacrifice in order to obtain her narcissistic supply from her primary narcissist. But to do so, she must be attuned to his needs. So this is her restricted use or leverage of empathy.

The inverted narcissist displays extreme shyness, lack of any real relational connections, is publicly self-effacing, is highly moralistic and critical of others, is a perfectionist, engages in lengthy ritualistic behaviors that can never be perfected.

I also mentioned that Akane has Cerebral subtype, in that she believes she has superior intellect, and the Covert subtype, where she seems altruistic and selfless on the outside but internally she is driven by a self-serving need to be useful, to be wanted, because she chases after this external validation to fill in the gaps of her own self-esteem and call to perfectionism.

There is room to argue that Aqua is actually the inverted narcissist and she's codependent on Akane who is the altruistic/communal narcissist subtype. I reviewed it, but it seems she's the codependent one in this scenario.

I think this answer entails that Aqua himself also has NPD, and I think he does have Vulnerable Narcissism with Cerebral subtype. Kana actually picked up on it pretty well:

He does tend to think that he is the sole person who can accomplish this mission of revenge, even though it took him 4 years to crack a passcode and he actually didn't solve anything himself. Like, ever.

He thinks that he has some superior ability to read people and manipulate them (and it's not necessarily true, he just believes so).

And he likes bringing it up out loud a lot, like I used you, or haha she's so easy to manipulate, regardless if he actually did anything.

When Ruby points out he hasn't made any friends, Aqua deflects and becomes defensive.

He also initially thought that he was going to make it big as an actor after the one time he did well as a child, and entreated Gotanda to take him in, but when his PTSD was getting in the way of his acting, he just chalked it up to saying no actually I was never talented in that, because he doesn't want to admit to others that he doesn't have the supernatural inhumane acting skills he thought he did. (Note: He's not comfortable showing those old acting videos to Kana, but is okay with showing it to Akane for this reason.)

He truly believes he's everybody's savior. Unprompted he just thinks he's some main character that caused everybody's suffering. His Behavioral Self-Blame (BSB) about the death of both of his mothers is a manifestation of his wish for control over the situation, which is a known coping mechanism for those with PTSD or Major Depression Disorder (MDD)

Vulnerable NPD subtypes also feel uncomfortable being praised, which is why he reacts that way with Kana.

Vulnerable NPD subtypes also hate being asked to compete, which is why during both LoveNow and Tokyo Blade arcs, he keeps out of the way.

Vulnerable NPD subtypes really really hate rejection, and that's why Aqua says that he can't confront Kana without a Pieyon mask because he's too weak to be shot down by her again.

Vulnerable NPD subtypes are quite anti-social, but again if you confront them about it, they'll just deflect you and say things like they had no intentions to make friends or they're busy observing or something like this.

I mean, look at this dumbass intellectualize having feelings for girls his age like Akane and Kana:

Kana gets it though:

ONLY A NARCISSIST WOULD (half-joke)

This is of course a reminder that people with NPD aren't inherently bad people, they also don't come in one shape or form as there are many subtypes, and they can swing in severity. Most of them are a by-product of either a traumatic childhood or an overly doting one. Akane and Aqua just simply happened to be both of these.

I just came to this interpretation when I kept thinking of why was it that it felt like both Akane and Aqua were using each other. They both felt miserable and yet felt necessary and dependent on each other's emotional comfort. They both lie to each other too. I think a lot of people have picked up on the "feeling" that the two are using, manipulating, abusing each other, there's something dysfunctional about them together, and yet they also genuinely care about each other a lot. And people couldn't pick the right words to describe that. Co-dependents and their primary narcissists can heal together into a healthy relationship, they don't have to stay that way forever. But for the most part, nobody really recognizes that that's what was happening, because the dance they do together looks completely synchronized as a relationship. Who ever says no to a sweet and completely self-giving girlfriend? Who would leave their boyfriend to die alone in a revenge plot?

ONLY A NARCISSIST WOULD (not joking)

#3 Does Kana know the real Aqua:

I think a lot of Akane fans love to cite that Akane knew about the revenge, the trauma, the using, the manipulation etc. She also knows what he's like when he's being silly and playful.

And I don't deny that Aqua and Akane cared for each other.

But I also think that Kana knew Aqua even when he was being unpleasant, making crude jokes about her when they were kids. Kana observes Aqua's acting meticulously and understands the fine details of his style. Kana also has actual conversations with him about his interests too. They read the same books and they jog together, and they're very comfortable arguing with each other about anything.

Most of all, of anybody, only Kana has pointed out that Aqua has chuunibyou/grandiose thinking, narcissistic tendencies, and that Ruby has a co-dependent relationship with him (even when she didn't know about their past as Sarina and Gorou, she just picked it up as the core reason for their clinginess).

#4 [Bonus] Does Kana know Kamiki?

I don't think so.

When Kamiki opened his production company/agency, Kana would have been about 11yo. It was around this time that she had been recording Full Moon and her other songs, and her career had been on a decline. Then her company left her and she started freelancing instead.

Kana's acting style is also diametrically opposed to Kamiki's acting. Which as Akane has pointed out is similar to Ai's acting style. Kana's acting is very emotionally honest and is rooted in her personal understanding of her own emotions, whereas Kamiki and Ai act to deceive others based on the calculated perception they know the audience wants of them. Given this, it's unlikely that Kamiki mentored her in any form.

Lastly, I think Kana would have been the first person to point out that Kamiki looks like Aqua if they knew each other, even if he was acting as the Miki-san persona.

But I did joke before that I think if Kana and Kamiki met each other, they'd just traumabond and be friends until the cops haul Kamiki away. And that'd be the funniest thing ever.

That's it! That was a very long rant. Thanks for the question.

#Oshi No Ko #Oshi No ko Spoilers #oshi no ko fan theories #Arima Kana #Hoshino Aqua #Kurokawa Akane #i didn't originally think that akane had inverted narcissism #actually i first did think she was being manipulative #skania was right about some stuff about how akane didn't really think she was doing anything selfishly #but that in and of itself was a problem like she was just so willing to help aqua commit patricide and happy to be geotracked and offer sex #it was so dysfunctional and anybody calling it out has a good reason to feel that way #even if my diagnosis of them was incorrect it's still true that their relationship was extremely unhealthy

[pearwaldorf]

what... should we do about this?! should we just set Ao3 down, find a way to choke down such fucking feelings that we should have been used to by now, and go use squidgeworld or somethin until it too goes down that route or whatever? there isn't any hope, is there? how do we cope with this?!

I mean this in the most loving way possible and I'm not picking on you specifically, to be clear. The easiest way to make something hopeless or inevitable is to treat it as a foregone conclusion.

There is a Jewish precept called tikkun olam. Roughly translated it means "world repair", which modern Jews have taken to mean an obligation to practice tzedakah (justice/righteousness) and participate in efforts to make the world better. I'm not Jewish, but it is a thing I strongly believe in.

Nowhere in these teachings is stuff about whether or not it will change things. Of course it is a hope you will, but none of that is guaranteed. There are things you do not because you think you will succeed, but because it is the right thing.

You're not wrong that trying to hold the OTW Board accountable is difficult. It is indeed hard to get it through people's heads that this organization that has done so much for fandom is also deeply dysfunctional in a way that is probably not reformable, especially in a climate where people are prone to "everything has to be entirely good/bad" and other such black and white thinking.

If we see something is wrong and we don't speak out, what does that say to azarias and other OTW volunteers? That their abuse and traumatization is an acceptable price to pay for keeping AO3/OTW running? That we are willing to sacrifice our fellow fans' humanity on the altar of the non-profit industrialization complex? (And make no mistake, a non-profit is capable of just as much abuse as any money-making business.)

I don't have a next steps Powerpoint or anything, but I think a reasonable action to take is to contact OTW and express your displeasure at how things have been handled. (I think Communications is probably the most appropriate dropdown, but if anybody has a better suggestion please let me know.)

Be polite, and list your affiliations with AO3/OTW if you have any (member/former member/donor, AO3 user, volunteer/former volunteer, etc). Make clear (if) you are part of the community this organization claims to represent.

Demand the resignation of the Legal Committee and the Board of Directors. Insist upon the creation of a new policy to protect volunteers from this sort of abuse and endangerment and a timeline for when it will be developed and implemented.

I don't know what kind of response you'll get, but I would not be surprised if it's extremely generic.

I anticipate there will be more opportunities to make your opinion known in the future. This is an issue that should not be swept aside.

#replies #star-the-honeybun #organization for transformative works #otw #archive of our own #ao3 #otw fuckery 2023

[postmodernbeliever]

okay so first of all love your work so far, thanks for sharing!! second i was thinking about how easily fox would get a hard on in public, like you give him a single word of praise or you say his name in a certain way and suddenly his work pants are feeling incredibly tight and his hands are running all over his face and he has to stay behind his desk or maybe stick a pillow down against his groin just for a little bit of relief and you barely even did anything

anyways i want to scream i need him so bad

payback- fox mulder x female reader (smut!!!!)

it takes very little to get fox going. one touch, one word, and he’s putty in your hands. so one day, when he's a little too much for you, you decide to hit the man with a little payback- and god, it's worth it!

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to whoever sent this ask in, babeeeee I DROOLED!!! i hope i completed the fantasy for you, even if just a little ;) put my own twist on it. hope you enjoy. <3

my ao3 | word count: 4,010

content tags: smut, teasing, public hand jobs, light angst, fox is needy as hell, you’re kinda hot… damn, cross posted on ao3

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°

it was embarrassing, honestly. he just couldn’t keep it together. fox isn’t typically so easy– well, in a way he is, because he knows just as well as you do that pretty much anything will set him off. but he’s always been good about hiding it in public… at least, he was before he met you. 

for a guy as horny as he is, you’d think he would thrive under pressure. you’d seen plenty of guys respond to the feeling, seeking a reward, and it would make sense for fox to fit this approach; he was cocky, often to his own detriment, and he pushed until he got what he wanted, whether that be top-secret files or a diet coke from the vending machine. he was a go-getter in every sense of the word. but the second his brain couldn’t keep up with his crotch, he became a lost cause. you liked that about him. it was so easy to get him flustered, and when he was, it was adorable; he tripped up every other word, he got fidgety, he struggled to comprehend even the simplest of conversation, and all that dysfunction was the result of a touch or a sound. 

you learned of this little talent of his the first time you visited him at work. the two of you hadn’t been dating long, but anybody in the same room as you could recognize the disgusting eyes the two of you gave each other. as much as he made your heart flutter, he also made your hips ache, and you were just dying for him– and he felt the same. he couldn’t get enough of you. one afternoon the agent gave you a ring on your cell phone and asked if you wanted to take your lunch break with him, and you laughed and informed the man you’d called in sick for no other reason than you couldn't bear to go into work that day. so he insisted you come and hang out with him in his office, at least for a little while, and you had no problem saying yes. when you got there, you finally got to snap the missing piece of his puzzle into place; the walls screamed of his nature, of his passion, the insanity that turned everyone but you off of him. all the files and disorganization piled high around him like a palace throne, and he sat in his squeaking desk chair, king of it all. you could’ve drowned in that room almost as badly as you wished to drown in him. you’d brought food from a shop down the street, and he ate it gratefully, and you talked his ear off for hours about cases and what it’s like to shoot a gun and have you ever seen any vampires?, and after a while of letting you see him in a space intimate as that, he was getting himself all worked up. you sat so pretty on his desk as he had his back to you, rifling through case files and showing you confidential things he could get fired for. you also looked so pretty when you gazed into his microscope in the back of the office, playing around with all his toys. but when you walked over to where he sat behind his desk and touched all his photographs with curious eyes, and said, “looks like you’re good at your job, fox,” you learned for the first time how easy he was to please. you ogled how he crossed one leg over the other and let out a frustrated groan, and how every move you made wasn’t so much admired as coveted; you saw pleading eyes, a dry mouth, restless hands running up and down his legs and over his blushing skin. you saw how once he couldn’t take it anymore, he cornered you by his favorite poster and kissed you right beneath the saucer, and you’d never forget it.

you didn’t wield this power too often, because you didn’t want to frustrate him. it was so easy to get him riled up and leave him hanging, but you didn’t always have the willpower not to help him out after the fact. and who could blame you, when you have a six-foot-tall government agent for a boyfriend, noisy and whiny and brutally hot all at once? torturing him was fun, yet it had to be done sparingly. but it was a good kick in the back of the knee when he was getting too aggravating, and you could use that leverage right about now.

all day, fox had been getting on your nerves. it takes a lot for him to annoy you because most of the time if he's getting arrogant, you find it attractive. but today was a different situation. the agent came home early, pissed off beyond reconciliation, yet another official reprimand to stain his personal file with the bureau. he burst through the door with a mouthful to spew, and you’d hung around him all day as he paced the floor and brooded over his desktop full of files. you did just about everything you could to cheer the guy up; you made him fresh coffee, you threw his favorite sweater in the dryer so he could pull on something warm, you’d even called in a chinese food order so he could get something in his stomach. but none of it was working. when you tried to play with his hair, he brushed you off, and every time you kissed his shoulder, he’d meet you with near indifference. if you didn’t know how much he loved you, you might’ve slapped him, but this mood wasn’t one he could just get over. he was snappy and tired and upset, and there was only so much you could take, so when hours had passed and he was still being a grump, you decided to get some fresh air– but not without an ulterior motive, of course. 

with freshly set curls and the darkest lipstick you had on hand, you primped yourself to go out for a drink with a few girls from work. they invite you every friday night and you always decline, because there is typically a certain man waiting up for you– but that man seemed not to care, so you chose to take them up on the offer this time around. you shuffled through your blended closet, pulling one of fox’s suit jackets off the rack and draping it over your bare shoulders. you wore a little black dress with a sweetheart neck that stopped just above your knees, the very dress you wore on your and fox’s first date. shoving your feet into a pair of kitten heels, you clicked your way out of the bedroom and into the apartment, standing squarely before the television so fox was forced to take a look. 

“what do you think?”

you watched his big eyes trail up your pantyhose-clad legs, admiring the lacy pattern, and a smile quirked on his lips. “pretty. hey, you’re wearing the dress.”

“i’m going out,” you sighed, blowing past his acknowledgement.

“out? where?”

“some girls from work invited me to grab a drink at the bar,”

“but it’s friday night!”

you rolled your eyes, forcing yourself to tuck away the mischievous grin you felt creeping in. “well, i’ve been stuck inside all day with you, debbie downer. i wanna go have a little fun.”

the man shifted in his seat, expression turning sour. “so you’re not gonna hang out with me tonight?”

“baby, i’ve been trying to hang out with you all day. you just keep brushing me off.”

you crossed the living room to the foyer, where your purse sat on his dining room table. he got up and followed you in, and when you turned around he was right behind you. he had a softer look about him, something like regret, and you had to remind yourself to stand tall in the face of your biggest weakness.

“i’m sorry. i’ve been an asshole.”

“yeah, you have.”

“you know i love you,” he frowned, “more than anything in the world.”

even in heels, you still had to push onto your toes to reach him. with a soft kiss to his cheek, you replied, “i know you do, don’t worry.”

“but you’re still going out anyway,” he huffed.

“i am. but…” you pushed on his chest so he’d take a step back, “if you want to come with me–”

all of a sudden he had floppy ears and a tail, his sparkling eyes full of hope that you’d already forgiven him. “i can come?”

“sure, you can come… it’ll be work friends, though, you have to be social.”

“psh, me? antisocial? love, you’re crazy.”

you giggled as he hurried off to the bedroom, rushing to change out of the work clothes he’d sulked in all day. you leaned against the wall in the foyer, peeking through the door as he changed. you admired the curve of his back while he draped it with a white t-shirt and layered a henley over top, tucking the front into his jeans. you saw him reach for the brown leather jacket in the closet and silently thanked god. once he wriggled into that beat-up pair of timberlands you adored, you straightened out against the wall, working to keep your nonchalant composure. 

he did a little spin and asked in a girly voice, “what do you think?”

and in the deepest tone you could muster, you answered, “pretty.”

he scoffed, taking your hand and leading you out the door, promising, “not as pretty as you.”

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

this is where the fun begins. you got him out of the house and in public, where he can’t escape you, and you were going to have your way.

you saw it in every move he made after you placed your hand on his thigh. you sat with three coworkers at the bar, chatting and laughing while they slammed glasses of wine and you nursed a lukewarm beer. fox wasn’t a drinker, so he had a club soda and cranberry, and after a while, you started sharing his drink and leaving yours to collect sweat. you told them all about fox’s job and they questioned him endlessly about solving unexplained cases, and they all seemed to fawn over him which you expected; girls always drool over him when you’re around. he found it funny, and despite the inkling of jealousy, so did you. he seemed to be enjoying himself as he talked about his most recent case, and you smiled, because you’d been waiting all day to do this. you waited for him to finish his sentence, and you let your hand fall gently on his thigh, laughing along with the others. 

“crazy job, don’t you guys think so?” you teased, and they all nodded, yelling over each other in the chaos of the bar. 

fox shot you a look, and you bit your lip like you had nothing on your mind at all. he leaned in close to your ear and asked, “what are you doing?”

you bumped your nose into his cheek playfully. “nothing!” 

“b-but–”

“but what?” you interrupted, pushing your hand down his leg to reach his knee, which you scratched at softly with your fingernails. he felt the sensation through his jeans and shuddered. 

the agent took a sip of his drink and placed his hand over yours on his knee, stopping your teasing. he glanced at the girls who'd invited you, and all three of them were in some deafening debate, almost like you two never showed up. you crossed one leg over the other on the barstool and turned towards the man, deciding that if they were going to be in their own world, you might as well have fun in yours. 

“they’re pretty hammered,” he diverted.

“good,” you smirked, “maybe they’ll be drunk enough to leave us alone.”

“i thought you wanted to come spend time with them,”

“i did, but you know me. i like you better.”

you admired the blush on his cheeks, and you knew it was burning hot because the only light inside the place radiated from neon signs. his eyes darted all over, and he kept chugging his soda, and you felt pride flooding your chest. 

“listen, i’m sorry about today,” fox apologized, tucking a lock behind your ear. “i hope you’re not mad.”

“not anymore,” you winked, and you leaned over to press a kiss to his jaw. you barely let your lips touch his skin– you wanted him to wish you’d come closer. 

slowly, calculated-like, you took his glass and stole the last sip, making the effort to dribble a little down your chin. you wiped up the spill with your thumb and licked it off, and fox’s lips parted. you wished it wasn’t so loud, because you could imagine the soft pant that fell from those lips. 

“what is it, baby?”

the man gave you a look, and then he shifted in his seat. your eyes drifted to his lap, where a little bump was rising, and they nearly bugged out of your head. even if it was what you set out for, you'd never get used to how little it took to get him going. you draped your hand over his bicep and squeezed, placing down his empty glass with glittering eyes.

“y-you… what- what are you trying to do?” fox stammered.

with an innocent bat of a lash, you answered, “nothing, foxie!” and when the flames began to paint his face, you giggled, “something wrong?”

“well- you- i- i mean,” fox groaned, rubbing his hands back and forth over his rosy face to try and shake the feeling swirling inside him. “you’re acting all…”

“all what?”

you stared intently as he passed his hands through all that thick, tawny hair on his head, wishing they were yours. something about him was unbelievable when he got this way. he licked his lips and swallowed nothing but air.

“fox, what’s gotten into you?” you chuckled as the man began running his palms back and forth across the wooden bartop. 

as he dug at the counter with his nails, he grumbled, “you– you’re doing this on purpose, aren’t you?”

“m’not doing anything,” you lied as you let your hand fall on his thigh again, this time dangerously close to the bulge with your name written on it. 

you watched him hiss, taking your hand and putting it back in your lap. he raised his own in an attempt to flag down the waiter, but there was no chance he’d get noticed; the bar was packed to the gills with drunken bodies, all swarming around you, all moments away from being privy to his situation if you pulled anything else. fox looked like he was lost– in the bar, in his head, in the pressure pushing against his pants– and you were soaking it in like sunshine.

“you look so good tonight, have i told you that?” you gushed, “well, i did as a joke before, but i mean it. you’re so handsome.”

“come on, love,” fox rolled his eyes as if he couldn’t believe you were doing this here, now, in front of the world.

“what? i’m being serious! i like that shirt on you, it makes you look so strong,” you brushed your fingertips along the neckline, letting your nails drag across the base of his throat. you watched a torrential shudder tumble down his back, a curated avalanche in the making. 

“i- i mean-”

“–and you’ve been so sweet since you got over your mood, which makes me so happy. you know i love when you’re good to me,” you sighed, “and you are. you’re so good to me, foxie.”

suddenly, a strong palm wrapped itself around your wrist and tugged you off the barstool. fox didn’t even bother telling the girls where you were going since you hadn’t heard from them in a while anyway; he only pulled you through the thumping building, weeding through clusters of drunks towards the glowing bathroom sign in the back. butterflies were stuffing you full as he pushed open the women’s bathroom door, which was miraculously a dingy little single with a lock. letting go of his grip on you, he locked the door, muffling the blaring noise coming from outside. 

“hey, wait a minute–”

fox’s face dropped. you yelped as he rushed his hands across you, touching everywhere he could, snaking them beneath your stolen jacket and under your dress. you reveled in the feeling, but once his lips tried to press against your neck, you clicked your tongue in disapproval. 

“not here, fox,”

“nobody’s gonna see us,” the man urged, “i– you– come on, please?”

“if you want anything, you have to take me home.”

“you just fuckin’ teased me all night,” he growled, “please, baby.”

you giggled as he backed your hips up to the one and only sink, trapping you beneath his palms. his hard-on twitched against your stomach, and as you looked up into his tall, swimming eyes, you could see something surrendering inside them. you pressed your hands against his stomach, and he pressed himself against you, sighing softly at the ounce of relief. 

“you’re so bad, wanting me to get you off in a bar bathroom,” you teased.

“yeah, i’m the bad one. don’t act stupid.”

“don’t be mean, or you get nothing.” you sucked on your teeth, giving him maliciously sweet eyes. 

“okay, okay, i’m sorry. just… please.”

fox leaned down to rest his head on your shoulder, letting out a whimper so soft it was nearly undetectable. you had to stop your eyes from rolling back at how needy he was; he’s never been this bad, of all the times you’d brutally strung him out in public. maybe it was because he was experiencing your twisted form of payback, or maybe it was all the stress from work in the morning, but you pushed him to a new limit without ever really touching him. your entire body began to burn as you reached your palm down between his hips and rested your hand where he begged for you, and felt a pair of lips attach themselves to your neck, nipping softly at the skin in gratitude. you massaged him like he was fragile, like anything rougher would break him, and in a way, it was true– his knees were weak already, and as he rolled his hips against your palm, his hands trembled at his hold on the hem of your dress. 

“need me that bad, hm?”

all you got back was a strangled, “mm.”

“m’not gonna get on my knees, the floor is too dirty,” you chuckled, knowing he wanted more than what he was getting. 

fox didn’t speak. his brain was too wired to indulge you, but his body ached to be touched, so he found a nonverbal way to ask for it; he lifted you and shoved you onto the sink, and you scrambled to grab at the ceramic countertop. 

“fox–”

his big hands shoved beneath your dress and dug into the chub of your hips, scratching at your legs like a dog. he craned his neck down to kiss you, and as you got distracted by the sugary cranberry crystals at the corners of his lips, he moved in a hurry to unbutton his jeans. you didn’t know exactly what he was doing until your hand made contact with smooth skin, and you looked down to see his cock just barely bouncing in your buzzing palm, swollen and screaming for contact. 

your lips turned downward in a sympathetic smile as you cooed, “oh, baby.”

you shuffled up the counter a little bit so you had a little more room to arch forward. bringing your palm up to let a little spit dribble out of your mouth, nice and slow, just how he likes, you watched his jaw drop and you spread the stuff around your hand with your tongue. when he was sufficiently driven insane, you wrapped your hand all the way around him and laughed. 

“i can feel that second heartbeat you’ve got,” was all you said before you began pumping. 

fox’s hands flew to your face as you stroked him, his thumb gravitating to your tongue; his eyes were glazed over like never before, and you wished you could take a picture. you watched air fill his tummy over and over, heaving in desperation, and he bucked into your hand as if he’d never been touched before in his life. you moved a little faster, feeling the soft disruption of his veins underneath your fingers, swiping your thumb over his tip and making him shake. and fox was all noise, louder and prettier sounding than any club song baring behind the locked door. strings of your name interlaced with curses and promises and praises of how good you were, and how he loved you, and that he wished he was home so you could do more than this, and you sat there swearing that he would get what he wanted the second you two left. by the time you shut him up with your mouth, he was nearly there; and by the time you pulled him by the hips right against your soft stomach, both hands on him, his cock close enough he could feel your dress bunching up on his head, he was there. he was far fucking past there, cumming all over your pretty black dress, leaving milky stains you’d have to cover with his jacket, stains he would be reminded of later when he ripped that thing off you at home. you were in his ear instantly as he collapsed into your shoulder, holding him up, voice soft so you didn’t make his head buzz any more than it was already. 

“oh, good job, baby, good boy,” you smiled, “how’s that, hm? better?”

“bet… better,” he panted, back to the obsessive kissing all over your neck. 

“there’s so much more where that came from, foxie, i promise.”

“then can we get the fuck outta here?” he whined, pulling away to show you his pretty pink face. 

with one last warm kiss, one where you caught his lip between your teeth just for fun, you nodded. “get me a towel first."

fox passed you a paper towel which you used to wipe your dress with, and he chuckled at how you gently folded it up and dropped it in the trash can, like it was a treasure to you. then, as you hopped down from the counter and he zipped his jeans back up, you took him by the hand and dragged him out of the restroom, back over to the bar where your three coworkers were wasted beyond saving. you leaned into the conversation and said, “gotta bounce! i’ll see you guys next week!” and didn’t stick around to hear the drunken replies. instead, you guided the pretty boy behind you out to the parking lot, where he rushed to get behind the wheel and drive you home. you thanked god he didn’t have a drink in his system because he was in a real hurry. 

as you sat in his passenger seat, watching his jittering hand play with the gear shift, you were almost satisfied. your idea of revenge might be a little twisted, but it worked. you’d accomplished what you set out for, now the owner of an apology and a man aching for you. but after that stunt at the bar, you had a newfound greed, one you wouldn’t shake until he got you home; and maybe you were abusing your power, but how could you let up now? as you placed your hand over his, the engine revved beneath your feet, and you giggled. maybe it was torture, but he liked it– so you played with his fingers, and he groaned, and when you finally reached his apartment building, the two of you couldn’t get upstairs fast enough.

#fox mulder #x files #spooky mulder #the x files #txf #fox mulder x reader #fox mulder x you #fox mulder smut #hornyposting #lmaooo #david duchovny

[mingos]

oof. so… hello.

i know i’m not obligated to explain my absences, but i figured i should anyway because this is actually a long-standing issue i've been dealing with that, god fucking willing, doesn't happen againーbut that is what i told myself three weeks ago before it happened again. basically, because it can sometimes be so common, kinda just want to give a heads up if i ever start acting weird or distant because apparently i've upset some people i didn't mean to.

that stresses me out because, as i've mentioned before, i kind of have this tendency to shut down completely during stressful situations and not speak to anybody, which eventually turns into friends dropping me for a perceived lack of interest (not their fault, my fault). i'm actively trying to break that habit & be okay with vulnerability, so i want to be honest about where i've been and where i could potentially go in the future if this shit happens againーin a few weeks, in a few months, tomorrow... it all just depends, it's not a situation i can control. i'm not trying to ignore people. i just deal with a lot sometimes.

content warnings immediately below the cut but idk maybe just don’t read this if you’re in a bad headspace, or a really good headspace that you don't want ruined. no one should read this, actually. just jump to the last two paragraphs. this is just me explaining i'll hopefully feel okay enough to be back by the weekend.

-

cw: alcoholism; cw: domestic abuse; cw: gen. bad mental health

　i currently live in a dysfunctional situation with an alcoholic & addict family member as the last person in our family yet to distance themselves/cut them off. reason being is they relapse a lot. like, “an average of at least once every 2-4 months since i was 14” a lot. this is a long-standing problem. they’ve been through quite literally every treatment plan imaginable and nothing has stuck.

i do love this person; the majority of the time they're not relapsing, they’re kind & loving. when it’s good, it’s good. but when it’s bad jesus christ… i gotta level with you and say i've feared for my life a couple times.

they become angry & spiteful when drunk and, as of the last few years, physical. mostly when i try to confiscate things i find because i'm "stealing their property" and it’s therefore, to their drunk mind, justifiable. this is a mindset i’m still trying to unlearn because of course i don’t deserve it—taking a wine bottle away from an alcoholic for their own good isn’t justification for them almost suffocating you in an attempt to get it back, or breaking the lock on your bedroom door—but it’s hard to internalize that sometimes when your brain is beaten down, y’know?

when not being guilted into silence so i don’t “ruin their life more” or get threatened with being removed from the house by police, i’ve pretty much exhausted any sympathy or help i get from the rest of my family. half of them either have my # blocked or don’t answer under the weird assumption my family member is going to… use my phone to contact them? which is something that’s never happened before. the other half kind of just shrug because i’m choosing to say here and am an adult with the ability to leave whenever i want, just like they did.

　but i can’t leave—because, like i said, it’s just me now. no one else checks on this person, no one else lives with us, and i’ve already had to call 911 for them multiple times. living with them during a relapse is hell but so is whenever i have to leave the house because if something happens to them or their dog that suddenly becomes my fault. basically, whenever these episodes happen it’s just several days (or weeks) of nonstop stress. but there's nothing else i can really do. i just have to put up with it & ride it out.

-

　things have finally calmed down again; apologies were made, talks were had, we cleaned out their stash together... i finally have some breathing room. kind of. i still have no energy to do anything because i've just been in survival mode the last week (& also sick), so hopefully i can be back to writing by this weekend but i really don't know. i'm still paranoid something bad is going to happen so maybe i'm not out of that mindset just yetーi need to decompress a little before i can feel normal again.

thank you for your patience, and for those who have checked on me & especially those who were understanding it was kind of hard for me to have the energy to talk outside of my one or two comfort people. i miss you all very many and hope nothing more for you all to be loved, warm & safe. love you all very many.

#‘ 001. ’ (out of character) #❛ 'what am i going to queue with law'? ❜ (queue) #will probably delete this eventually because this is honestly a level of Being Perceived that makes me uncomfortable because i feel patheti #but i've met at least two other people in similar situations to me so if there's anybody else out there i see you & love you.

[mctives]

okay i think i just need to talk about the thing about maureen from the original script. i'm going to be linking this on my pinned because it does affect how i write the character (and has already been for a week but i was trying to work this out before posting about it).

cw grooming, csa

note: this is a real sensitive topic (for me and lots of people), but i will clarify that i'm speaking as a survivor and probably the reason it's sticking in my brain so badly is that i think the vibes are still in the film (and maybe that's why i attached to stu sigh).

if you don't know, in the original script, maureen groomed and raped billy and stu when they were kids. not clear how young, but tatum says maureen likes 'little boys' and that seems to indicate pretty young.

and i could just ignore this, but now that i know it, i feel like it makes sense for the way billy and stu are dysfunctional, both together and individually.

it doesn't explain or excuse the murders other than maybe maureen's, so that's not what this is about. it's the way billy seems to have try to take control (by harming and abusing other people). it's the way stu compartmentalizes reality (very lovey-dovey with tatum when he knows billy's going to kill her, asking sidney if she called the cops and saying his parents will be mad, etc.) also, the way billy and stu seem inextricably connected despite not having much in common, really... and the fact stu killed maureen with billy, which really doesn't connect in the film as it was released imo.

basically, i cannot disconnect this from my portrayal in general, because it is just in there now, but i also don't want to alienate anybody so here's what i'll do:

. it will never come up directly in a thread unless we discuss it first. while it will color the way stu reacts or responds to certain things, the topic itself will only come up if we have talked about it. any posts that mention it will include the content warnings grooming cw and csa cw.

. i will never write out what happened in detail. while stu might share bits and pieces in threads if we've discussed it first, i don't want to linger on the actual events; just how they affected stu and billy.

. i don't know if anybody writes maureen, but i won't rp with maureen at all.

. if you are writing a canon scream character, especially billy, sidney, or tatum, please let me know if you would rather i not include this part of stu's backstory at all. (especially billy, since it happened to him too and he is the only one who absolutely would know. tatum seems to know something, but it's not clear she knows about stu, so that could go either way.) AGAIN, I won't bring it up directly in threads unless we discuss it first regardless.

. the representation of survivors of csa is extremely important to me for obvious reasons so please note: stu is not a good person, but that's not because of what maureen did. his trauma is just a part of who he is, not an excuse for how he treats others or his violent tendencies. i think being sheltered and privileged did a lot more to make him that way. the trauma does, however, affect his mental health significantly, which can affect HOW he does bad things (just not WHY).

#// headcanon #this is an important post for this blog so i'd appreciate if you'd read it so long as you can handle the content warnings #i have been stressing about this all week

[sob-sister]

He also did the same thing with Tori. It took him months just to unfollow her. And she would do the same thing, trying to make it seem like she was still around Jack by following anybody that even came in contact with the city of Louisville. Even though she had no picture evidence of being around him since February. And I just wanna bring up something that’s always bothered me about everyone around him. In an interview with GQ Jack said that he worries about saying the wrong thing because this is fragile and it’s not just him who depends on his career. But my thing is, many of them didn’t do the same for him. Nemo and Ky used to argue with his fans all the time on Twitter. Even John, his tour manager, got into it with them a couple of times. 2fo clearly being reckless and fucking Jack’s fans (which I have a whole psychoanalysis on why 2fo has a weird obsession/hate/love of Jack and would fuck his fans to feel closer to being like Jack). Even Miss Detroits finest used to messy. There’s screenshots of her interacting with his fans on Twitter before she deleted it. And her friends dming fans on Instagram to tell them Jack has a “girlfriend”. So that’s also a reason why some of his fans didn’t like her. She eventually stopped publicly being weird at least. But then she was accused of making fake accounts trying to out their “relationship”. That one is more hard to prove but I wouldn’t be surprised if she really was behind them or her friends. Especially after that Aladdin dude showed Tori’s Lock Screen of her and Jack on Instagram live and said nobody’s gonna screenshot knowing obviously somebody would. Even people who aren’t Jack’s friends but are friends of the homies would get on Twitter trying to interact with Jack’s fans. Like got damn all of y’all are corny and lame and clout hungry. And might I just remind you that everyone I named here is above the age of 30 or were close to 30 when they were pulling these stunts. I know you guys think it’s just his Dad who caused him to always want validation and acceptance from others but I think it was his mom too. I remember you posted an interview his parents did and his mom basically said that they taught Jack that he’s not that important. I know they probably meant good by that as to teach him to not get a big ego but instead it just made this man dysfunctional. He goes through periods of where no one can tell him anything and then periods where you can tell his self esteem is seriously low by the way he allows people to play in his face. He seems to have a savior complex because of this too. It’s why he’s attracted to such fucked up people. He thinks the only way he will be important and loved by someone is if he can provide them with things and fix them. Or as he likes to call it “elevate” them. What he needs to realize is you can’t fix people only they can themselves. And that he can be important and loved by the right people if he thought better of himself as well. Parents really make a mistake thinking that they shouldn’t dote on their kids because it will give them an ego. Really it just ends up making the kid have bigger issues. They gave that boy no self esteem and it shows. In the friends and types of women he involves himself with. He truly believes he must be of use to someone to be important to them. That he as a person isn’t enough on his own.

that "break up" was years in the making. 😂😂 she seemed to be working really hard to project the image that she was close with his friends like that, yet we never saw any of them hang out with her one on one.

i will put that part of the interview down below.

i agree, which is why it made never made sense when people are always screaming about privacy on here, when it's those closest to him providing that information.

beyond that i don't have much to say since you summarised it so well. love the psychology talk at the end.

thank you for stopping by.

[jt-artsandfics]

I'm a 21 years old American woman (I'll be 22 on the 20th!) Who is 5ft 10in if you round up. I have rusty brownish hair and eyes that shift from grey to green to blue depending on my mood and energy. I'm athletic, but now it's more so for mental health health reasons now days. I love to embroider, read, and write (even though I'm Dyslexic). I use sarcasm as a second language. I don't love attention on me, preferring to be in the background. I just want to equip and empower other people to reach their full potential.

I work with kids with special needs while I study to become a social worker and I fall into leadership roles, even when I don't intend to. I'm stubborn and independent, but deep (and I mean deep) down inside I'm a romantic at heart who wants to be able to depend on another person. I feel a bit like a walking contradiction sometimes, but in a good way. Like I watch MMA while embroidering or will swear like a sailor in Church. I'm the middle of two boys (now the older sister of two sisters because of my mom's remarriage!) and as one brother who literally is Wrecker (Machine Gunner in the military. Loud. Just wants to blow things up), I've learned how to not intimidated by large and scary looking people and will mom anybody who needs it. I'm extremely intuitive and can read body language really well due to my auditory form of Dyslexia.

Hey I'm guessing you want a bad batch match up. And since you put your age I might make it a little smutty too. Ps. Im drinking while writing this so there is bound to be speelimg mistakes. And guys I'm also dyslexic too so yay. But I hope you enjoy!

MDI +18 (HINTED SMUT ) NOTHING HAPPENS BUT STILL

The Bad Batch

I match you with... Hunter

Hunter's first time meeting you was quite the tale, a mission gone messing resulting in most of the batch being injured. Watching them walk off their ship and you had made a beline for the Sargent.

Hunter has never heard that many curses come out a civilians mouth and damn he's kinda turned on over you telling him off but he'd be damned if he told anyone that.

It was an honest mistake you ripped him a new one once seeing his team believing this was your brothers team back from mission.

Once you realised this wasn't your brothers team you are a flushed mess trying to apologise to the sergeant when leads to the team taking a shine to too after watching you chew Hunter out. Watching someone of your height and stature taking on Hunter without even a thought.

That's how toy got invited for drinks with the dysfunctional group of clone soldiers

From then on the boys would come to you when they needed down time. And considering they haven't really had anyone check up on them mentally it's nice for then to be able to talk opening with someone. Hunter takes a while to break but once he does you see him nearly every time the batch is on leave.

It took him a while to get comftable but once he felt he could trust you.most days he shows up he flops down on your couch and rest his head in your lap and let's you play with his hair while he talks.

He loves pulling you into his lap and falling asleep while watching holos with you, to day it's a guilty pleasure would be true.

Please make him little embroidery peices like he will find some way to wear them or display them. He doesn't know why he does it but he loves showing off the things you make.

To say this man fell for you is an understatement full on crashed is how I would put it. And now he can't get enough of you.

Once the jedi order falls he purposely seeks you out to makesure your alright and that nothing has happened to you before he ask you to come with him.

Watching him and omega is quite something this man is so protective of her and you that when your In public people always assume that you three are family.

Hunter's eyes never leave your figure as you shop with Omega. He watches as you point out things to her before walking over to look at them. "Hunter!, Hunter. Come look at this" the young girl calls out which makes the sergeant smile as he makes his way over to the two of you. "What have you two found this time" he ask while looking down at different things that Omega found interesting.

Ord Mantell was filled with markets and you could always find something of your desire here. In the end Omega had talked Hunter into letting her buy a small science kit on the promise she asked Tech to help her with it.

"May I offer you something that may interest you and your husband" a voice quietly asked from behind you which makes you turn. Your eyes widen a little. "Oh um Hunter and I aren't married haha" you reply blushing only for the woman to smile lightly. Hunter calls out that he and Omega are heading back. "I'll catch up with you!" You call out before turning back to the lady who laughs lightly as she watches Hunter and Omega walk off.

"You two are rather close if your not married and not to mention having a kid too I'd say it would almost count" she replied before pulling out a small vile. "But if you are telling the truth and aren't together I can sure tell you want that man and by the way his eyes linger on you I'm willing to bet that he wants you just as badly" she says smugly.

Your face is a bright shade of red. "And what exactly are you selling me?" You ask wearily as she place the small vile in your hand. "Try this if he still doesn't take interest after this then it's free of charge. But if it works come back and then pay me 20 credits" she replys. "I'm not going to drug Hunter!" You almost shout which makes her laugh. "Hun you use it on yourself it's a natural phenomenon enhancer. All you have to really do is get him interested and the spray will work wonders on your body. Tho I recommend doing a test run by yourself first to see how you react. It will in turn make you very horny" she states while leaning down on her hand and giving you a little motion to run along.

Hunter had been sitting in Sid's parlor for most of the night since coming back from shopping. But something had him on edge an almost sickly sweet floral smell mixed with your natural scent that lingered in the air. He didn't know how to describe it but for the past half an hour it's all he could smell, it's faint but by the stars does he want to follow it.

He hadn't seen you since you had come back from shopping and so after finishing his drink Hunter gives the rest of the batch a wave before heading thought the corridors to look for you. As Hunter gets closer to your room it's like the smell is more intense it smells like you but more, he knows what you smell like and this it was doing things to him. He almost growls as he reaches your door. He could finally pinpoint what it was, he could smell your arousal and it had him action almost like a feral animal.

He has to stop himself from almost ripping the door off you smelt insanely divine, he knew your smell to well and this felt like it was enhanced, if he had had describe it the best he could say was it felt as if you were in heat. And by the stars it made him want to fuck you. He steadies his shaking hands before knocking. "(Y/N) It's Hunter, I'm coming in" he tries to sound as civil as he can as he opens the door.

As he walks in your smell hits him like a freighter and he has to hold himself up against the wall as he closes the door behind him and locks it. Hunter can see you withering on the bed whimpering and moaning. Your whole body covered in sweat.

Hunter removes his armor before throwing his shirt on the floor as quickly as he can before making his way over to you almost like a predator stalking his prey. Once he comes into your eye sight you almost whimper more legs clamped together trying to keep some friction before you feel his cold hands run up your legs which makes you gasp and moan at the contrast of his skin and yours.

"I could smell you from down in the parlor" he growls while crawling to cover your body with his. "Hunter" you whine out as your hands shoot out to grip his shoulders and pull him closer. "Tell me what you want" he says. It takes so much self control not to just take you with how you smell.

"Need you"

#star wars #star wars clone wars #star wars clones #the bad batch #tbb imagines #tbb x reader #bad batch hunter #dad hunter #hunter imagine #hunter #hunter x reader #sergeant hunter #sergeant hunter x reader

[sailors-fightinginthedancehall]

Season 5, Episode 1!

Vibes, amazing artwork ooh look a bald guy

Do I know the bald guy? I feel like I do

I also feel like he's staring into my soul I wish he wouldn't do that

That is a lot of ... Milk? vitamins? Drugs? Whatever it is there's a lot of it

That's very empty, kinda suspicious

Oh there's a reason it's suspicious they're doing some probably illegal stuff got it

OH WAIT THEY DID THAT TO THE TEAM ARE THEY THE GUYS???

Fair enough, it's extremely boring, sports

OH THOSE ARE THE GUYS NOTED

... who did you leave behind? WHO DID YOU LEAVE BEHIND?!

Coulson, Mack, May, Simmons ... Alright who else was there? Daisy, Fitz and Yo-Yo, am I missing anybody? Got to check for those until I'm told who was left behind

OH NOT ANOTHER PORTAL

Why on earth would the portal lead there?

Kill that thing? WHAT THING? WHY IS IT TRYING TO KILL YOU?

Those are all questions I would love to know the answers to

Zero.

"Roaches" is certainly easier to remember than the thing beginning with V you just said.

HI MACK :D

Well you can scratch that one off the bucket list!

Okay, Yo-Yo's there too. Just Daisy and Fitz left to see. Unless I've forgotten someone. Or it's just the waitress.

"Outer" is very precise, thanks for that Coulson

Now who would that happen to be?

Do they perhaps take off that mask?

OH GOD WE GOT A SPACY THEME MUSIC AND A NEW LOGO GUYS SHIT IS REAL

Yes May I agree, wasn't fun enough. Needs more fun.

Coulson you're better than Inspector Gadget! EXCEPT ONLY WHEN YOU HAVE YOUR COOL HAND

Mack is just done with the bullshit

There's SWORD, but they're not on the moon

Fair point Mack, that's a very fair point! You don't half hit people!

But if you were a fireman then I never would have been able to see you in this TV show that I am a healthy amount obsessed with!

Yeah weird random stranger, don't call her Yo-Yo

FITZ DIDN'T MAKE IT OKAY NOW WHERE IS DAISY?

Been there done that, probably do it again

... Somehow I do not think that he will be showing you anything. I think he might be a little bit dead.

THERE'S DAISY! :D

Ooh the helmet is off except I CAN'T SEE THE FACE JUST THE HAIR IT'S VERY ANNOYING

Is that like a tracker? Why are you cutting it out of him why? What is that thing?

Oh Jesus Christ hello I guess

Well that's a nice greeting

HOW DARE YOU NO YOU FUCKING DON'T YOU JUST SAID YOU WANTED TO HURT MAY YOU DESERVE A HELL OF A LOAD OF PAIN

WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT

SMALL PACKAGE?! HOW DARE YOU

The world is a simulation!

Stonehenge? Not your best reference

:( He's doing everything he can!

Absolutely not.

It's went from "has nobody seen a robot movie" to "has nobody seen an alien movie"

Honestly you just look like some dysfunctional congo line Coulson, hate to break it to you

Ah so they're called a Metric? What's a Metric?

OH GOD HOW ABOUT YOU DON'T

Howard Stark? I can't see Howard Stark creating this

Well that's comforting

Jemma Simmons the magician!

Home :)

Think of it as a scavenger hunt!

OH HIYA FELLAS ...

How about you don't experiment huh

I don't think they'll beg for their lives. Depends on what you do, but if it's bad they'll beg for the other's life

So then what do you want to hear? Spanish? Mack's giving you Spanish.

May :)

Fr fr best buddy right there

Goddammit we don't trust Virgil guys!

Gallery? You're inviting the Kree to look at paintings?

Aw, he called her Mi amor <3

I don't think that's good thinking honestly I think you should just let them live their lives

Yeah NO NO DON'T DO THAT

Ah so they're called Kreepers, good to know

May's a pilot!

Nice to meet you Deke I guess

Yeah they just wanted pie :(

Some sense of normalcy, interrogation

Oh dear.

RESCUE YO-YO DAISY RESCUE THEM

Because they seem to be weirdly obsessed with them.

YES DAISY! GREAT JOB GANG!

Well it's lucky you kept that Simmons!

You seem to have words though, Simmons

Wing nut? That's an insult

Coulson's probably wishing he was high right now and that this is some sort of drug-induced fever dream

You'd look great with two hooks, Yo-Yo. But it's good you don't have them.

... is pie not a thing here?

Yeah last time I checked earth was fairly not falling apart (I mean it is on the inside but not like that)

Oh god that must be so sad for Fitz

#phil coulson #alphonso mackenzie #melinda may #jemma simmons #daisy johnson #elena rodriguez #leo fitz #agents of s.h.i.e.l.d. #Virgil #Deke

[c-is-for-circinate]

So as close as I am to fully escaping Hades for the first time, I figure I might take this opportunity to write down a couple of things I'm scared of from this ending. The story is so good so far! But I have seen good stories before! And there are patterns, right, patterns it's so easy for even good stories to fall into, so yeah, I have fears, and they mostly come down to Hades himself.

(Yep, this one got long again! People seem to be enjoying my game-reaction rambles, so, for your enjoyment under the cut: themes of separation and reunion, predictions for what Zagreus is the god of, and a whole lot of discussion of familial abuse dynamics, how they're depicted in fiction, and the work it takes to change them in real life. Stay warned! Stay safe!)

(ALSO, I still haven't made it past the first couple of chambers in the Temple of Styx, so no spoilers in the reblogs/comments please! Yes, even though the whole post is me going on about predictions and hopes and concerns about the path the story might take. I WILL GET THERE SOON.)

It has been really interesting watching some of the stuff the game is doing with themes of parting and reunion, and how that corresponds to life and death. So many of our social links are about reuniting estranged loved ones: Chaos and Nyx, Eurydice and Orpheus, Patroclus and Achilles. Hades is estranged from Olympus, Persephone left. And every time we leave, or try to leave, it is both an attempt at a parting (and Meg and Than are so hurt by that goodbye, or lack thereof) and an attempt at a reunion with our mother. Every time we die it's a reunion, every time we die it's fun, it's great, we get to go back home and check in with all of our friends and be impressed by whoever made Employee Of The [Timeperiod] and sell fish to the cook and put down yet more rugs. (My Zagreus has something of a rug addiction. What can you do.)

It's at the point where I feel pretty secure in stating that Zagreus is going to discover eventually that he is both life/death/rebirth god, and god of partings and reunions. Both halves of both of those things. People leave each other when they die and re-find their loved ones in death; you go away from one group of people to come back to another; you have to depart to return, and I really think that's where we're going to end up with Zagreus. He's going to reunite his various friends with their loved ones, he's probably going to restore communications between Hades and Olympus and even Persephone, he's going to reunite with his mom, and he's going to come back to the Underworld before he leaves to see everyone up top all over again. And of course the vehicle for all of this coming and going is death, because death is the ultimate departure and reuniter. (This is absolutely a religious concept containing a whole bunch of "oh hey our culture has a lot of Christian influence, doesn't it", Greek trappings aside, but that's fine, it's a game made in 2018 not 300 BC, these things happen. They keep calling the Underworld 'hell' and 'infernal'. It's all good.) Of course he's a cthonic god. Of course he bleeds, because you have to bleed in order to die, and Zagreus has to die again and again and again. That's his whole thing.

Thing is, though, looking at those themes, I am also continually aware of the fact that some partings are for a really good reason. Some partings should not end in reunion.

Yes, of course this is about Hades the abusive dad. I have been talking about Hades the abusive dad basically non-stop since I started playing this game, where did you think this post was going.

There are a few things I'm nervous about, separate but related, and at the core it all comes down to, I'm not okay with it if we learn why Hades got to be this way, and Zagreus forgives him as we-the-audience are meant to do, and Hades promises to do better, and nothing concrete about the situation is forced to change. Actual, meaningful, practical, logistical, non-hypothetical non-metaphorical change, not just for Zagreus but for Hades himself.

Because I know how this story tends to go, in fiction. Fictional abusive parents (especially in fantasy/sci-fi stories) tend to come in two types: 'coerced their offspring into actual murder with a side of physical abuse and optional unethical lab experimentation', or 'this was here to create character conflict, we didn't mean for it to read as actually abusive, this parent just has flaws to make them a good character, we swear!' Hades isn't the first type--we have never once seen Hades strike his son, or anybody, or even come out from behind his desk--which means that the fear is, always, always, in every piece of fiction, that he's the second. That the writers are going to decide that the right response to his abuses is remorse, forgiveness, and one really good conversation. That they don't realize it's abuse in the first place.

And, like. They have to know, right? They have to. They can't have done this by accident. (Sometimes, writers get so close by accident.) They can't have done so well at drawing out this situation simply by going, 'well, people are meant to fear this god, so they'd probably react like this, and I guess based on what I've seen in other stories or vague acquaintances they'd then do this,' and never put the name on the situation. Every single time we leave to the tune of a Hades word-flash, he's being dismissive, insulting, and sometimes downright cruel. He is cruel. They have to know!!!

But oh boy have I been consuming media for a lot of years, and oh boy have I run into a lot of writers who don't know.

Reconciliation is such a loaded word, but stories about dysfunctional families really do love it. Stories based around themes of reunion are primed for it. And of course, it's nice, it ties a happy ending off with a sweet little bow, everyone gets to be with the people they love and the family is safe and nobody gets hurt, but so rarely have I seen stories that show the actual work required to rebuild those relationships in a realistic or meaningful way. So rarely do stories trying to build that happy ending actually let the victim of abuse set and maintain boundaries. The character never gets to actually just cut the damn ties to the thing that hurt them. The character so rarely even gets to be safe.

And it's so hard in this game specifically, because "THERE IS NO ESCAPE", because every single thing about this game says that the story's not over when Zagreus gets to the surface, that no matter what he's going to have to come back. It's so hard, because this is a game about reunions. I am not going to get an ending where the abused kid trying to flee his toxic home and abusive dad actually gets to leave and stay gone, not in this one. And that hurts (I have watched and supported and done my best to help multiple real-life friends get the fuck out of homes like that, and stay gone, I have seen how hard it is, how complicated, how awful, and there are never stories for that), but I can live with it, if I get an ending where Zagreus is at least safe. Where things change. Where they really change.

Which is why I need actual, concrete, material changes in the logistics and power structure of the Underworld for this ending to be okay. Understanding why Hades is Like That doesn't cut it. Remorse doesn't cut it! Because look, even if Hades wants to do better, even if he admits he's at fault and tries to be better, he is still set up in a position as an all-powerful tyrant, and trying to become a better person is hard. There is nobody around who can keep him in check when he starts backsliding, which he will. Even if he doesn't want to, he will.

Because people are people, and it's really difficult to break patterns! Especially if everything around them stays the same. Hades is going to slip at some point, be cruel, be callous, be tyrannical, no matter how much of an effort he's making. Not to mention, it is STRESSFUL to face your own crimes and improve, it sucks, it feels bad. And what do habitual abusers do when they feel bad? What's the only coping mechanism Hades appears to have established for dealing with his own shit? That's right, it's inflicting suffering on everyone else around him. (This is why it doesn't really matter what circumstances drove Hades to act this way, why it can't matter--I believe that he is suffering, but he copes with that suffering by inflicting additional suffering on everyone around him, everyone who relies on him, and that's still true no matter what made him feel bad to begin with.) So then we just get a great old guilt-->lashing out-->more guilt-->more lashing out merry-go-round of abuse even as Hades is trying to change. That's how these things work. And yes, change is possible, improvement is absolutely possible, but the environment needs to change first. The system that enables and rewards Hades for acting this way can't stay in place. Things need to actually change, with people who are around to support Hades in his growth and also check his power, people who have power of their own to stop him. And however it happens, for this story with this protagonist with these goals to feel like a happy ending, Zagreus needs to be safe.

It would be okay, though a little disappointing, if those changes were mostly based in magic and fate and, idk, divine mind-control. (This story has been so grounded in actual human dynamics that a fantastical solution to a realistic problem would feel like a letdown, but if it actually solved the problem I'd be okay with it, more or less.) It would be okay, though a little disappointing, if the responsibility for bringing Hades to heel fell upon Zagreus and Persephone, if the two family members who he hurt badly enough that they felt the need to run away from him entirely now had to shoulder the burden of helping him fix himself. (There are definitely ways to write that dynamic better and ways to write it worse, and I think I trust these writers to land on the 'better' side of the scale, but I still don't love the implications.) I think I'd be pretty into it if Hades took a vacation off to Olympus to Work Out His Shit with his own family, while a coalition of Meg, Nyx, Thanatos, Zagreus, and Queen Persephone took over running the Underworld in his absence. I think we might end up getting some combination of those things. I'm hopeful. I think these writers might know what they've written. I think they might have a sense for what it'll take to fix.

But yeah, I'm nervous. (Nervous enough that I might switch to God Mode just to get through, combat has started getting really tedious instead of fun, I want to know what happens next, and this is a game and there is no shame in making it more fun for myself by making the boring parts a little quicker and easier.) I've seen so many stories go wrong. This one has done so much to earn my trust. We'll see if it breaks.

#Hades game #Hades spoilers #driveby meta attack #C plays stuff #I have so much hope!!!!~! #I have so much fear!!!!! #DO NOT TELL ME WHAT THE ANSWER IS GOING TO BE!!!!!

[donutloverxo]

New years eve

Note- Sequel to temptations

For the lovely @star-spangled-beard-burn s challenge.

Please do not steal or repost my works. Reblogs are welcome.

Summary- You might not be his girl but you are still his.

Warnings- smut, semi-public sex, cheating, slut-shaming, dark elements

Word count- 2.2k

Masterlist

He clutched the tall champagne flute in his hand hard enough to almost break it. His jaw clenched as he looked at you dancing with that loser boyfriend of yours, having the time of your life.

Your hair swirling to the sides as you bobbed your head to the rhythm. He smirked when he remembered how he’d pull on it as he pounded into you from behind. He went back to frowning when you started grinding your ass against that assholes crotch. He was too drunk and clueless to do anything but stand there.

And then you looked at him across the dancefloor, and fucking smiled, before turning back to capture the drunk idiots lips in a kiss. Your titts, almost spilling out of the tight dress you wore, as you pressed up against him.

He had enough. He stalked towards you with purpose, grabbing your arm pulling you against him. “You mind if I grab her for a second, Bryce” he spit the name out with such venom while his lips were curled in a dubious smile.

Bryce, being too delirious to remember his own name, just nodded.

Ransom pulled you towards the mens room, he purposely kept his grip on your arm a bit to harsh. He loved hearing you moan and protest to let up a bit, while you struggled to keep up with him in your high heels.

He pushed you up against the wall. He didn’t bother locking the door, if someone finds out that’s not really his responsibility.

He forced his tongue into your mouth swallowing your moans. Pushing his knee between your legs grinding it against your cunt. He could feel the wet spot forming on his dress pants.

You broke the kiss to take long gasps of breathes while humping his thigh. Watching you fall apart was now one of his favorite things to do.

It all started six months ago. When Bryce introduced you as his girlfriend. You looked so beautiful, enchanting even, with your pale pink dress that ended just below your knees, your lips stained with pink lipstick bore a shy smile. Your hair perfectly framing your pretty face. You were so demure, so reserved. A classic good girl. But he knew better. He knew something was fishy.

He caught your gaze lingering on him too long for it to be considered proper. Or how you’d blush from the slightest touch from him.

You showed him just how bad you were when you ambushed him while on a getaway to the Bahamas and practically bullied him into fucking you.

He did feel slightly bad, but any semblance of guilt was gone when he was buried balls deep inside you, your cunt clenching around him, milking him for all he’s got.

If Bryce didn’t want you to wander he should've taken better care of you. That’s on him.

You’d always complain about how boring and clichéd Bryce was. Ransom didn’t know why you were still with him, he never bothered to ask.

It wasn’t the first time he was with an ‘unavailable’ woman. He actually preferred it that way. No commitment, no strings attached and he always had the upper hand, the leverage.

But you were different. He didn’t plan on getting so attached to you but if he sees you kissing or in the vicinity of your good for nothing boyfriend, he will do something to be guilty about.

“What you like being a tease?” He mocked pushing your panties to the side, pumping his fingers in and out of you “I can see your ass hanging out of that dress. You want to be groped huh?” he taunted while brutally finger fucking you.

“Just you” You gasped holding onto his shoulders for dear life as you came around his fingers.

He unzipped his pants taking himself out of his boxers. He pushed you down to your knees. You weren’t like anyone he’d ever met. You tricked him, of all people, into believing he had power over you. That he was in control. It took him too long to realise you were the one pulling the strings all along.

“Suck” He demanded and you followed like the good slut you were. You took him in your mouth. Your cheek hollowing while you bobbed on it making loud squelching noises.

He groaned holding onto you as you moaned around him. He could cum in your mouth and make you swallow every last bit of it, but he needed to fuck you, remind you who you truly belong to. It would bring him great satisfaction knowing you’d go home with that prick when he was still inside of you.

He pulled you off of him much to your disappointment. Pinning you to the wall your legs wrapped around his waist.

He cupped your cheek smudging some of your lipstick with his thumb. You bit his thumb gently sucking on it. Your eyes looked so sweet so innocent. Maybe that’s how you managed to trick him and everyone else.

“I’m going to fuck you so hard. You will feel it for days” he drawled out pushing his thick cock in your cunt, right away setting a hard brutal pace. “Is his cock this big? Huh?” He cruelly rolled his hips against yours and all you could do was shake your head.

No one had ever fucked you like Ransom. You would be lucky if Bryce managed to last more than five minutes.

You felt yourself tipping over the edge again. Clenching around him, he grunted cursing, his thrusts became erratic your orgasm triggering his own. He spilled inside of you, making sure to sit deep within you for a moment.

“The next time you think about teasing me” He paused buckling his pants up “don’t”

“There won’t be a next time” you state as you look at your state in the large mirror. Your blood red lipstick smeared across your face, your mascara running down, your hair a mess. There was no way you could go back out looking like this.

“What did you say?” He pulled at you to look at him. If looks could kill.

“Ah stop doing that!” You yelled your bruised forearm hurting even more so.

“What do you mean last time?” he sneered.

“I mean we’re not doing this again. I found an engagement ring in his sock drawer. I’m sorry Ransom” You finally freed your arm from his grip caressing it with your other hand. You could feel Ransoms rage, looking around for a way out. But he was standing in front of the only door.

“What? You don’t even love him. You’re going to marry him?” He knew people didn’t need to be in love to get married. Since you were willing to marry just about anybody, then why not him?

“I do love him. I love you too” You caressed his face with your hands. As if that would make it hurt any less for either of you.

Ransom was meant to serve as a distraction from your boring life as a trophy girlfriend and a future trophy wife. You didn’t want to reach a point where you would blow your brains out of boredom.

You thought you could have harmless fun with Ransom but then your conscience got in the way. Bryce had been kinder to you these last few days, more than anyone you’ve ever known. You couldn’t start a marriage based on lies and infidelity.

“Really? Then marry me” He said. You shook your head at him in denial. He caged you in against the counter. “What’re you worried about? Money? I’ve got plenty of it”

And he wasn’t afraid to spend it on you. He had got you plenty of designer bags, perfumes, jewellery just because he could. He almost bought you a car. But you drew the line there. You didn’t need to give your boyfriend any reasons to be suspicious.

“It’s not just that. Bryce is...safe” you mumbled looking at the floor.

He propped you chin up to make you look at him. “If you wanted safe, you wouldn’t be here” He leaned in to whisper in your ear “Just admit it. You like this. You like a little bit of danger”

Oh but Ransom wasn’t just a little bit of danger. He was prone to fits of rage and temper tantrums along with not having the ability to keep his dick in his pants. He didn’t have a job, if his grandfather cut him off he’d never be able to support himself or you. Then there was his dysfunction and toxic family.

“Why would you even want to get married? Didn’t you say ‘I don’t do relationships' ” You said trying your best to mimic his deep hoarse voice.

“You’re mine and that’s that. A piece of paper doesn’t mean anything”

You sighed exasperatedly. You knew he wouldn’t give up easily. Nobody has ever said no to him. You weren’t too thrilled to be the first. “I was never yours” you said softly “let’s go it’s almost midnight”

Surprisingly Ransom let you go. Keeping his distance from you for the rest of the night. However you knew it was just the calm before the storm. Whatever, you could deal with him later. He wasn’t as complicated as he seemed.

At the stroke of midnight you kissed Bryce. Your heart broke a little when you catched a glimpse of Ransom kissing a girl before you went back to watching the fireworks light up the dark gloomy sky.

It was hard to say goodbye to him. You didn’t want to. In a perfect world you and him would be together forever. Right now you know you made the right choice. You might feel a bit sad now but you would appreciate choosing Bryce in the future.

You quickly left the party not being able to stand to be around Ransom anymore. Bryce wanted to hang out with his friends some more so you left alone.

You got home taking off your makeup. The tight dress Ransom gave you and made you put on a little show for him. You already missed him. You cried yourself to sleep.

You couldn’t stand the fact that he might hate you. That you’ll never be able to kiss him again or hold him again. You made the right choice but was it worth it?

You woke up the next afternoon with a migraine. Your break up and the copious amounts of alcohol hitting you just now. You looked to your right to see that the bed was still perfectly made. Looks like Bryce spent the night at one of his friends house.

You sent him a text to check in with him. The day went by. You tried your best to keep busy with chores and work to think of anything but Ransom and your missing boyfriend.

When it was almost bedtime and Bryce still hadn’t turned up you called up all your friends, including Ransom, to see if they had heard from him. Ransom never answered. Which you understood you had hurt his feelings along with your own in the process. Your hopes to hear his voice again were crushed when his phone went straight to voicemail.

The next morning you went to the police with Bryces parents. They blamed you for leaving him alone at the party.

You walked home alone in the dark feeling completely lost. Your year wasn’t off to a good start. That’s when you saw him. Ransom standing in front of your door waiting for you.

Your body moved of its own accord, running to him, embracing him in a tight hug. You were crazy to think you could ever stay away from him. He hugged you back nuzzling your neck, his light scruff tickling you.

You pulled away to look at him with tears streaming down your face. “Bryce... he’s missing. I don’t know what to do. It’s my fault isn’t it? I should’ve stopped him, he drank too much” You covered your face with your hands trying and failing to hold back your sobs.

Ransom rubbed your back to sooth you. “It’s not your fault doll. I promise he’ll turn up” He cooed “Let’s go inside you’re freezing”

He ordered you some take out chicken soup while you took a long hot bath. You had barely eaten anything in the past few days. The hot soup burned down your throat. With a full stomach you slept peacefully in Ransoms arms.

He proved you wrong and made you feel safe and protected. You didn’t know what the future held for you. If you would still be with Bryce after he comes back. Right now you were content to cuddle in your lovers arms.

#berry writes #ransom drysdale x reader #ransom drysdale #ransom thrombey #ransom thrombey x reader #ransom thrombey smut #ransom thrombey imagine #ransom thrombey fanfic #ransom thrombey x you #ransom Drysdale x you #chris evans x y/n #chris evans x reader #steve rogers x reader #ransom x reader #ransom x you #knives out fanfic #knives out #seasonsoffiction2020

[sou-ver-2-0]

Hello 💜 I might have been spamming you a bit with the likes but I really do enjoy your meta💜 I also wanted to mention that I really do like the way Reko says she wants to reach out to Shin if you go Reko/Sou route? Gin and Reko being worried about him (w/ Gin likely feeling guilt for having voted for Kanna) was pretty sweet, especially with him treating Gin nicely in general and Reko having tried to get him open up early into 2-2 Main Game too? I don't think that route will end well but (p1)

(p2) I would honestly dig Reko and Shin being on friendly terms if the cast made out, especially with how Alice/Kanna route has Alice ending up being a big bro protector figure to Kanna, while Reko the only adult Shin has yet to be betrayed by that's alive and had the sense to vote for him than Kanna is the younger sister who plays big sis to a good deal of the cast. It's just an interesting thing actually, that how dysfunctional Reko/Sou route vs Alice/Kanna is?

(p3) With former, there is still some awkwardness compared to Reko/Kanna with Reko having already taken a big sisterly role with her, but Alice is more than willing to look out for this child, while with Reko/Sou you can see that Reko genuinely feels bad for him and wants to amend things, yet Kanna's death really was the last straw for Shin that at best she is going to get Shin not looking out for chances to actively harm her (or Gin) while they might be collateral damage anyway.

Part idk bc I forgot to mention: I like how his "I-I wouldn't leave you behind..." to Gin right after they visit Gashu's secret room sounds like he is hurt that he would think he would leave a primary schooler back if he found an escape path too, especially with him in ch 1 saying Gin should rest with him and Kanna and likely having planned to look out for him too, if Gin wouldn't have said he gives him weird vibes and stuck to Sara. And offers him snacks to leave him work in Nao's room gfkfg

Okay I swear last part but I forgot to mention that I also like that Gin says he hates loner but doesn't want him to die/says he feels sorry for him for smelling gloomy and he is actually one of the members who while saying he hates him in 2-2 Main Game, he also does get worried for the "outsider" types, saying he is worried they might not get enough clear chips? That said wow bullied by a primary schooler rip Shin

Hello there! I really enjoy your meta too! 💜

I absolutely love this ask. You wrote so much, so I wish I could think of interesting things to say, but all I want to say is “I love Shin’s relationships with Gin and Reko too!! I love them so much!!”

I suppose, in a way, Gin and Reko act as a barometer for how a “normal, decent person” would react to Shin. They are suspicious of him and sympathetic towards him at all the right moments in the narrative. They are neither as cynical as Keiji nor as optimistic as Kanna. But they are hilarious and I love that for them!

Like, you just mentioned all these genuinely sweet moments for them. But if I can pull up some contentious memories:

REKO: I'm gonna take that bastard out, I swear...!!

GIN: I bet he's just hiding under the bed in his room or something, woof!!

REKO: Perfect spot for a treacherous ass like him! Let's check it out!

This comes from the beginning of Chapter 2 when the whole team is on a witch hunt for Shin, and I just! I love how eager and aggressive they are in their pursuit of justice, oh my god haha. I love how well they both team up against him. It’s such fantastic dark humor.

Then I love how you can tell from Nankidai’s writing that Reko aggressively shakes Shin when they finally find him!

KANNA: What in the world happened?

SOU: Eh...? / T... That's what I wanna know... / Where is this place... When did I get here...?

REKO: Cram it, you bastard...! Like hell anybody's gonna worry about you now! / What're you plotting?! Tell me!

SOU: W... Waugh?! Hold on...!

KEIJI: Now, now. Violence isn't the answer, Reko.

REKO: Tch...!!

SOU: W... What is it...? You're so mean suddenly...

Featuring a bonus obnoxious “Now now” from Keiji, LMAO get a load of this filthy hypocrite.

I just love to imagine Reko grabbing Shin by the scarf and shaking him! Nankidai blesses us with the wackiest scenarios.

Also remember when Gin wanted to scribble on Shin’s doll??

GIN: Let’s scribble on the loner’s doll, meow!

SARA: Gin…

CHOICE: Don’t get us caught

SARA: Safalin will find out. Don’t touch them.

GIN: Meow! You’ll live to see another day, loner!

And they always call him “Beanie Man” and “Loner” instead of his name… They crack me up so much!! I could go on and on about them!

Anyway, the only reason I bring up these contentious moments is to highlight how sweet it is that they don’t actually hate Shin at all. As you pointed out, they end up sympathizing a lot with him! If Shin was just being his regular vulnerable self, they would probably be protective of him. (And just a little bit teasing!) I think that speaks very well for both Reko and Gin. It shows what genuine good souls they are.

I also love that you pointed to examples of Shin being protective of Gin! It’s lovely to imagine that if Shin hadn’t taken on the Sou persona, we could have seen more “big brother Shin” moments like that! Personally, I’m very fond of imagining Shin as a good big brother figure towards all three children in the Simulations. I want to think, in his true heart, Shin is someone who couldn’t stand to see the children die before him.

That makes it all the more tragic if they end up becoming collateral damage for Shin’s revenge. :(

I also love to imagine that they could become friends if Shin lived, and if things worked out just a little bit better. I don’t believe Shin actively hates them. Reko voted for him, and he would just hate Sara more for “tricking” Gin into helping to murder Kanna. I don’t know if Shin…wants to live anymore…in the route where Kanna dies… But if they managed to escape, I think Reko and Gin would both worry a lot about him! And they would want to help him. I’m certain!

Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me. I’m a huge, huge fan of the loner’s relationships with the rock star and the furry kid. Seeing fan art or fanfiction of them being actual friends gets straight to my heart.

#yttd #your turn to die #your turn to die spoilers #kimi ga shine #reko yabusame #gin ibushi #sou hiyori #shin tsukimi #sou and reko #sou and gin #reko and gin #asks #mine #meta #headcanons

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #443

“it’s not a life sentence, but a death dream for you”

When was the last time you were in the hospital? Me personally, uhhh sometime in 2017? Why were you there? I had a cyst removal surgery. Do you like Cheez-Its or Cheese Nips better? Cheez-Its. Have you worn headphones at all today? Yeah, I pretty much always do because YouTube is always open and on a video. When was the last time you had blood drawn? A few months ago or something? I'll be getting some drawn shortly though for genetic testing; due to my mom having some dysfunctional cancer prevention gene, all her children are getting tests to see if we inherited it. The last time you got blood drawn, what was the reason? I want to say I was tested for anemia most recently. What color eyes does/did your father have? Brown. What do you daydream most about? Things I wish I didn't daydream about. What is your relation to the last child you spoke to? They're my niece and nephew. Do you believe the Holocaust happened? No fucking shit? Do you prefer zebra stripes, tiger stripes, or leopard spots? Tiger stripes, ig. When did you last see a dog? At my nephew's b-day party a couple weeks ago. Nicole brought her dog Zeke over. Have you ever been in the mountains when the moon and stars were up? No, but omg I wish!!!!!!!!!! Do you know anyone from Canada? Yep. Has a cat ever licked you? Yeah. Roman especially loves to give kisses. Where would you most like to go in your state, etc. that you haven’t been? The Wizard of Oz park, probs. Are you scared to look at your own organs on x-ray or ultrasound? No, that shit's rad. o: Have you ever walked on a frozen lake/river? No, that sketches me out. I'd be afraid of the ice breaking and me falling in. Have you ever seen a volcano? No. Have you ever met an Alaskan? Met in-person, no. But I do have an online friend who's from Alaska. Or may still live there? Idk. Have you ever mowed the lawn (even a little bit)? No. Have any unpleasant public transit stories to tell? Nah. Do you know any German words? Seeing as I took four semesters of the language in high school, I know a good deal. However, my skill has definitely atrophied with time and lack of application. Do you have a passport? No. Are your teeth straight? I mean, mostly. I had braces for too long, but I didn't wear my retainer, so they've moved back some. Would you mind dating someone significantly shorter than you? Yeah, sure. I've never understood why height is an issue for some people. Can you quote the movie Mean Girls? No. I personally never got the craze. Have you ever swam in the Atlantic Ocean? I have. The Pacific? No. Can you make yourself cry? No. Have you ever held a starfish? Not a live one. What would you do if you found out your ex was pregnant/fathered a child? Faint or vomit. Wail. All three. Are you very close to your siblings? No. :/ Can you do CPR? No. Favorite sport to watch in the summer Olympics? I don't care. Ever flushed a fish? Yes. Ever been paid for sex or a sexual favor? No. I wouldn't agree to that. Last friend you talked to online? Sara. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity? No. What is the best ice cream flavor? Vanilla. You have so many topping options. What’s your favorite thing to do outside? Photograph nature, especially wild animals. What would you spend $1,000 on? A big, really pro tattoo. What was the best (non-romantic) night you’ve had? Hm. I don't know. Who did you last lay in a bed/couch/recliner with? Mom and I sat together on the couch some time ago. Do you keep a planner? No. What are you craving right now? I've got a seriously random craving for shell pasta with a nice, meaty tomato sauce. Do you want kids anytime soon? DEFINITELY not soon, but also never. Has anyone ever drunk called/texted you? No. Have you ever slept in the same bed with the last person you kissed? Yeah. What’s the best feeling in the world? Knowing you're in love and really feeling it. What’s something you really want right now, be honest. There's a lot of things. Who in your family do you act like the most? I don't know, really. Who has made the biggest sacrifice for you? My mom, 100%. Do you believe that your first true love can be your only love in life? Of course not. Have you ever kissed under water? Yes. Is there that one guy that you’ll always have feelings for no matter what? Suuuure is. Wish it wasn't like that, but I don't see it ever changing, to be real... Are you 100% over the last person you kissed? 100%? No, I can't say I am entirely. Have your parents ever caught you kissing a guy? "Caught me?" How old is this question meant for? Yes, they've seen me kiss a guy before. If you mean like, seriously kiss-kissing, no. Which one of your exes hates you the most? Probably Jason. Are you named after anyone? No. Well, my middle name has been passed down, but "Brittany" wasn't from anybody else in specific. What reminds you the most of your last relationship? The song "The Only Exception" by Paramore. Have you ever rejected someone but they still wouldn’t give up on you? In elementary school, yes. When growing up, did your family always eat at the dinner table together? Usually, yes, at least when growing up. Sometimes we'd use little tables to eat in the living room though while watching TV. What is the greatest source of happiness in your life? My mom, best friend, and pets. What was the last charity/cause you donated to? I'm unsure, actually. Who was the last person you got a handwritten letter from? Sara! :') Did your parents read bedtime stories to you when you were little? Mom did. Have any of your worst fears ever come true? Yes. The greatest fear I've ever had was losing Jason, and that happened. Is anyone in your family divorced? My parents, for one. My older half-sister has also be divorced because her ex is an absolute piece of manipulative horse shit. Has anyone in your family gotten pregnant as a teenager? I think my mom? No, maybe not... Idk. I ain't doing the math. What’s your greatest talent? If you want a serious answer and not something self-depracating, I suppose writing. Would you ever want to get a master’s degree? It'd be cool, but I've never *actually* wanted to pursue that. Have you ever worn revealing clothing in order to get attention? No. Have you ever been falsely accused of being racist? I've never been accused of being racist, because I'm not. To you, is sex just about physical pleasure, or do you see it as an expression of love and commitment? Absolutely the latter. I could never engage in sex without deep emotional commitment. How many times have you been drunk in the past 6 months? Zero. What’s your favorite French food? I have no idea. What’s the most elaborate recipe you know how to cook? Nothing. Which rooms of your house have doors that lead outside? The living room and kitchen. Best purchase you ever made? My snake. :') Is there anybody you think is hot over the age of 40? I haven't seen him a long time, but boy did I have a thing for James Hetfield in high school. There are defs others, but no one else immediately comes to mind. Have you ever been caught sneaking out? No, because I've never tried to. How many Facebooks have you had? Just the one I still use. Have you ever been punched in the face? No. When was the last time you talked to the first person you kissed? The beginning of February, 2017. What is the latest you have ever slept in? Past 5. Do you have to watch yourself in the mirror while you brush your teeth? No. Do you text when you drive? Fuck no. You couldn't pay me to. What movie do you really want to see that’s out? I don't even know what movies are out right now. Did America really put a man on the moon? Eventually, yes. Call me crazy, but I do believe the supposed first one was faked, though, to "beat" Russia in the space race. Do some research and it's pretty shocking. Would you like to date someone a lot purer than you? Idc. Do you turn your phone off at night when you go to sleep? No, but I turn the brightness down for if I wake up in the middle of the night and want to check the time. Have you slept in a bed with the last person you kissed? Yeah. Has anyone ever told you that they loved you, and you didn’t say it back? Yes. Has anyone ever played a prank on you? What happened? I don't believe so. Do you like tattoos and piercings? Helllll yes. :') What are you really into? Animals, art, some weird Korean guy on the Internet... Do your parents like your best friends? Yes. Have you ever taken a nap with a member of the opposite sex? Yeah. Do you have weak upper body strength? Yes. What color was the last cup you drank from? It's just clear glass. How old is your oldest sibling? I actually don't know her exact age. 30-something. What was the last thing you ate that had nuts in it? A Nature Valley cashew bar I had earlier today. How many pieces did the last puzzle you completed have? I have no idea. Who did you last shake hands with? uhhhhhhhh Has anybody asked you out on a date recently? Nah. When was the last time somebody asked you to be their girlfriend? When Girt asked me out a few years ago. Name something you’re picky about: Food. Who did you last ask for help? My mom. Do you like corn? Yeah. If you were offered to smoke some weed right now, would you accept? Right now I honestly probably would, believe it or not. Honestly, who is the last person to tell you that they love you? My mum. Have you ever made out for more than a half hour straight? Yeah. How do you earn money? The only occasions where I ever and very rarely earn money is if someone (non-family, of course) pays me to take pictures for them. Where were you raised? All you need to know is a crappy town in eastern NC. Are your ears gauged? No, but I want the first holes in my earlobes to be, but only with very small gauges. I just can't figure out how to do it myself, at least with the gauges I have. I think I'm missing something. Explain what triggered your last kiss? We were saying goodbye. Could you go a month without talking to your best friend? I mean I could, but it'd seriously fucking suck. Have you ever made out in a park? No, because I don't do that in public. What are you listening to? "Paint You With My Love" by Marilyn Manson. I wasn't big on the album when it came out, but this is one of the songs that's aight to me. Last thing you said out loud? I gave Venus a little wave and said "hey babe" or something like that like I do sometimes when she's slithering around and looks out towards me. Are you sad? Always at least a little bit. I have been kinda down this evening. Where is your dad? I would hope at home. He's probably watching TV, or maybe in bed.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''paint me with your love'' by marilyn manson

[dumbkiri]

Buried Secrets

Parts: [1, 2, 3, Here] 

Summary: [Name] is slowly losing her self to the chaos magic. Everyone leaves Connor, Gar, John and [Name] behind. Everything seems so messed up and [Name] gives the boys a mission. To find the Titans. 

Pairing: Dick Grayson x Female! Reader

Genre: Boring Action, Slight Angst

Word Count: 3.5k, 10 pages

Warning(s): none...unless you don’t like blood???

"Hush, little baby…" A woman's voice was singing and her heavenly voice echoed in [Name]'s ears. "Don't say a word…" 

[Name] opened her eyes and saw pitch darkness surround her. The voice disappeared and it was eerily silent. 'This isn't right. Something doesn't feel right,' [Name] thought. 

Her feet carried herself two feet forward before she felt a push on her back. [Name] had blindly stumbled forward and fell onto her knees. She looked behind her and waved her arms around, but she felt nothing. She could have sworn someone pushed her. 

Suddenly she saw flashbacks of herself and Jason. 'That's right,' [Name] remembered, 'Jason was going to jump.' She pushed her hands on the floor and felt small pebbles connect with her sweaty palms. 

 "Papa's going to buy you a mockingbird..."

 [Name] wiped her palms on herself and the pebbles fell off. It should have made a noise although the only thing she could hear was that singing voice. Even Dick's voice was being drowned out as if she was underwater.

 "And if that mockingbird won't sing," [Name]'s head began to ache and a sudden pang made her hands shoot up to hold her head in comfort. She winced and muffled her groans by biting onto her lip.

 "Papa's gonna buy you a diamond ring," 

She wanted that voice to go away. She wanted to gain her eyesight back. She knew Dick and Jason were around her, but she couldn't find them. She also knew that they weren't on the roof anymore. 

"I lied." Dick began. His voice was so far away.  It was just an echo of his existence.

 [Name] looked from her left to her right. She turned around. Walked forwards then backwards. Went left then right. But no matter where she went she couldn't find anyone.

 "And if that diamond ring turns to brass," 

Then something unexpected was happening. [Name] felt a liquid rise up to her knees within seconds. It was like the room she was in was filling up with water. But this liquid was thicker than water. She realized when the liquid was over her head and she opened her mouth to scream...her tastebuds told her it wasn't water. [Name] was drowning in a pool of blood. 

"Papa's gonna buy you a looking glass,"

 Her hand clawed at the space around her. Her legs kicked to rise above the blood. She was running out of time. The darkness was going to take over soon. She needed help! 

"And if that looking glass gets brass," 

‘Someone, help me!’

"[Name]..." Jason snapped his fingers waking up the mother from her mind prison. She looked around and noticed that she was sitting at a table with John sleeping peacefully in her arms. He was starting to drool and that wasn't the only thing she noticed.

 Around her, small objects were covered in a red mist and levitating from their original places. Her power was acting on her emotions which were uncontrollable at the moment. This was the cause of her episode. [Name] needed to play it cool, act as if she did it on purpose because the look she was getting from everyone showed confusion.

 "I'm sorry," she droned, "you can continue, Dick." [Name] flicked her wrist and the objects were back in their places. Her arms held John close to her chest and without being noticed she spat into a tissue. When she saw her bloody spit, [Name] involuntarily shivered. Her mind prison was real. 

The whole team looked at Dick and they waited for more of an explanation to what he lied about. Dick’s brown eyes revealed that he was hesitant, but after what Jason was planning to do. Everything inside of him said tell the truth. Finally let out his demons.“I lied to you guys because I was afraid you'd leave this place. And me. And if that happened, there would be no Titans.” Dick was addressing the new members of the Titans. 

Then he looked at his old team, “And I lied to you, too. I told you that Jericho was dead when I got to the church, but he wasn't. He was alive. He died trying to save me from his father. I'm sorry. You all deserve more.” His words, they were sincere and honest. Most of all, they were painful. Dick held this for too long and he knew that if he let it out sooner, they would leave him.

 Hank stood up from his stool and walked over to Dick. In a quick movement, Hank swung a closed fist at Dick’s face and Dick flinched. Although Hank did not make contact. Instead, his arm was covered in a red mist stopping him from landing a punch and [Name]’s eyes were glowing red.

 “I don’t condone violence especially when my son is present.” She said glaring hard at the taller man. 

Hank cursed at [Name], “He’s a lying sack of shit!” His feet were grounded and [Name] would have him on his knees within seconds, but she didn’t want to scare the kids. She closed her mouth and remained silent keeping her hold on Hank.

 “How many fucking half-truths have you told us?” Donna questioned angrily, most likely refraining from attacking Dick. Although Donna knew better because [Name] wouldn't hesitate to stop her either. 

Rachel looked over at Donna, “At least you got a half-truth.” 

“My brother is dead because of you,”Rose spat out.

 “No” [Name] glared at Rose, “your brother is dead because of your father. And because of us. We let Dick convinced Jericho that he could join us. We all agreed because we wanted to get to Slade, to know his weakness.”

They weren’t convinced. [Name] was going to make them understand. “Donna, the man you loved died because of Deathstroke. Garth sacrificed himself to save you. His death was the only reason we were so enraged. We lost a great friend and for that, we were blinded. So blinded by our rage, we let a kid join us. We didn’t have a problem then. We used a kid only because we would have the chance to get rid of an enemy.”

 “[Name],” Dick called out to her softly. He noticed her eyes getting watery. 

“Jericho was a lovely boy. He had a future and we ruined it for him. You cannot blame Dick alone because it was all of us. Donna, why aren’t you blaming yourself? I could blame you for getting Garth killed.” [Name] spat out. 

Donna’s eyes saddened, but they were set into a glare, “It wasn’t my fault. Garth stepped in front of the bullet.” 

“Then why should we blame Dick for killing Jericho? It was the same situation. Jericho was a lovely boy." [Name] reiterated. "He sacrificed himself the same way Garth did. They both have something in common, a heart made of gold. They were willing to die to protect the ones they cared for. Garth loved you, Donna. Jericho, for once in his life, had friends.” 

[Name] paused and released the hold she had on Hank. He backed away and sat back in his stool where Dawn laid her hand onto his arm to soothe him. “I won’t lie, we’re a dysfunctional team. We have things we need to work on together and by ourselves. Dick wants to tell the truth for once and you guys are repaying him by a punch and blaming him. What good will that do?” 

They stayed quiet.

 “Maybe we all need time to understand what Dick told us. But Deathstroke is still out there. One day, we’re all going to understand that we need each other. Hopefully, when that day comes it isn’t because one of us died. God forbid it, I don’t want to reunite that way. I didn’t expect to tell you guys about John the way it happened. Although I was forced to because Deathstroke came after me. And I found out the horrible truth from him.” 

'This isn't their problem,' [Name] mentally scolded herself, 'This is Dick's time to tell the truth. Not for you to ask for protection.' 

Everybody perked their heads up at her. They wanted to know what could be worse than a kid dying for the sake of self sacrificing. [Name] wiped her tears and looked at John. Here goes nothing. 

“Cadmus is still after me.” 

Dawn furrowed her eyebrows, “I thought they were no longer interested in you? The chaos magic is beyond their control.” 

“Weren’t they only after your DNA to create something like the boy in the recovery room?” Hank asked sincere for once. 

[Name] nodded her head, “Yeah, but it was impossible to pass on my abilities. At least, that’s what I thought until John proved me wrong.”

 “No,” Dick said turning his body to face her, “please, don’t tell me that John inherited the one part that's not...you.” That hurt. Although, Dick was the only one who knew how dangerous chaos magic could be. He realized that someday it would take over the girl he was in love with.

[Name] brushed her fingers through John’s hair, “John did the impossible which is why I cannot let Cadmus find out that I can pass on the ability or let them know that John has it. I don’t want him to be in the hands of monsters.” 

“This is bullshit,” Rose sneered and jumped up from her seat, “my brother is dead and you only care for yourselves. Jericho didn’t deserve to die like that. I’m out.”

 “I’m going with her,” Jason said standing up to follow Rose. His eyes landed on [Name], he didn’t want to leave without her. She was the one that could take his pain away. But he knew [Name] wouldn’t leave Dick.

 “Jason, you-” Dick glared down at Jason. 

“Look, you don’t decide what I do anymore. What anybody does.” Jason didn’t spare a glance at the woman who helped him because he would have stayed put if he saw her sad [e.color] eyes. This was his decision. This was what’s best for him. 

Donna scooted off her chair. “I’m out too.”

 “I’m going with her,” Rachel jumped off the counter and looked at Donna. “If that’s okay with you.”

 “Sure,” Donna shrugged and looked at Dick, but he was too busy watching everyone leave one by one. He thought the speech [Name] gave would change their minds. John cooed as he watched everyone leave his family behind. 

“I don’t understand why they all left,” Gar said sadly and looked at the couple that remained. 

Dick had sighed and crossed his arms over his chest. He looked at John and pressed a light kiss on the boy’s forehead. [Name] gave him a questionable look, “You’re leaving too?”

 “I fucked up, guys.” Dick said. 

[Name]’s heart started pounding against her chest so hard. “After all I just told you and everyone else? Dick, I’m being hunted by Cadmus and you want to leave? I don’t understand why.”

 “I don’t know what you want me to do, [Name]?"

 "How about stay for once? Have you ever thought about that?" [Name] asked with a  daunting attitude. She was tired of seeing him leave. Tired of doing nothing alone when they had everything together.

 "Cadmus doesn’t know where you’re at and they can’t get in here. You and John are safest here. Also you have Gar to keep you company. I need to do something, for me.” Dick walked past her and to his room. Ignoring her.

 [Name] looked down at John and noticed his eyes getting heavier. She sniffled and gave Gar a small smile, “I’m going to put John to sleep and then I’ll make us some food. Anything in particular you would like?”

 Gar nodded his head, “Pizza?” [Name] chuckled and carried John in a way where his head rested on her shoulder, “Pizza sounds amazing.” 

Before she left, Gar ran up to her and placed his hand onto her unoccupied shoulder, “Hey, aren’t you going to tell Dick goodbye?” 

[Name] looked down at her feet, “He already said his goodbyes and I have nothing left to say to him. Let’s hope that they’ll come back soon.” 

……

[Name] played a piano song for John as he played on the brown round carpet in [Name]’s room. His stuffed lion placed by his side watching him carefully. John had been playing with blocks for at least an hour and honestly it surprised [Name]. Maybe the piano music soothed his antics. 

[Name] was so entranced with the music that when Gar barged into the room, she pressed her fingers onto the keys loudly. She also let out a yell of alarm. 

“[Name], he’s awake!” Gar yelled with excitement. 

“Lord have mercy on my soul. Gar, you can’t barge in all of a sudden, I had a near heart attack!” [Name] covered the piano and ruffled John’s hair.

 Gar smiled and walked up to her, “Conner, he’s awake.”

“Yeah and naked,” [Name] covered her eyes and Gar looked behind him to see Conner standing in all his naked glory. 

Gar grabbed a pillow from [Name]’s bed and shoved it to Conner's chest, “Dude, hide your junk! There’s a kid in here!” 

[Name] laughed and Gar laughed as well. Things in the Titans Tower was going well pretty far and for once [Name] felt grateful she wasn’t alone anymore. Gar had helped out with John and [Name] appreciated it. Gar was really the sweetest boy.

 “Oh crap, is this too hot?” Gar frantically asked [Name] giving her John’s bottle of milk. She took it from his hands and let a drop fall onto her wrist. It was actually at a good temperature. 

[Name] looked at the bottle then to John then to Gar. She smiled, “It’s not too hot at all.” She then gave the bottle back to Gar to which his eyebrows furrowed. [Name] said nothing as she guided Gar to the couch and sat him down. She sat beside him and chuckled, “You know John loves it when other people hold him. For some reason, he likes to get to know people.”

 “Really?” Gar asked and nervously looked at John, “you’re not seriously thinking about me feeding him, are you?”

 “Of course!” [Name] laughed and handed John over to Gar. She guided his hands and arms making sure both of them were comfortable. Gar’s green eyes watched in amazement as he held John for the first time. He felt the need to protect this bundle of joy. John cooed and grabbed the bottle. 

“He pretty much feeds himself, but babies’ arms get tired. When you see his arms slacking, hold the bottle for him. Make sure his head is upright, you don’t want him choking. Oh, and if his eyes start closing that means he’s done drinking.” [Name] looked at Gar, her [e.color] eyes connecting with his green ones.

 “I got this, I hope,” Gar chuckled and began feeding John.

 “Oh also I wanted to ask for permission,” Gar’s voice broke [Name] from memory lane. 

 “Is it okay for me to take Conner out into the world? He’s been here for so long, we have to teach him the ropes.”

[Name] shrugged her shoulders, “I’ll make us some food, you boys would be hungry when you come back.”

Gar cheered, “Yes!”

“Just don’t get into too much trouble.”

 …...

What do I do now, Dick Grayson? You left me alone to fix this major problem.

Oh god, [Name] had messed up royally. She just had finished making a salad when the news caught her attention. Her fingers hand stopped mixing the greens and veggies in the salad when she heard the news reporter. That’s when Gar ran into the living room with a phone in his hand.

 “Witnesses say that the young man was immune to police gunfire. San Francisco PD has issued a $50,000 reward for information leading to his arrest.” 

Gar pressed the phone to his ear, “Dick, it’s me again. I-I know I screwed things up real bad, man, and I get why, maybe, you don’t want to talk to me. But please call me back.” 

[Name] walked over to Gar and set her hands on his shoulders, “Gar, calm down. Everything will be fine, take a breather.” She instructed him and began doing breathing exercises with him. Gar followed her and he wrapped his arms around her body. Gar needed the reassurance and he was super glad that [Name] stayed behind.

 “I screwed up badly, [Name]. They want Conner and-”

“Where is Conner and Krypto now?” She asked rubbing his back to calm him down.

 “They’re here. We got out of there as soon as we could unharmed. It took a long time to find Conner and I convinced him to come back.” Gar said and removed himself from the hug. His green eyes looked down at the floor, “I didn’t teach him better.”

 “I’m sorry if I messed things up,” Conner walked into the kitchen with Krypto by his side. “I only wanted to be a hero.”

 [Name] smiled at the boys, “Well we have to lay low for now on. Only going out for groceries. We don’t know who saw the news and-”

“ZONE SIX. UNAUTHORIZED ACCESS.”

Conner looked at [Name], “What’s that?”

[Name] grabbed John’s blanket and wrapped John in it making a makeshift harness where he was latched onto her back. “It’s a security breach on the roof meaning we got intruders.”

Multiple soldiers broke through the glass windows with guns aimed at them. They were yelling at them, ordering them to comply. On instinct, [Name] raised her hands and all the soldiers fell onto their backs with groans. She looked at the boys and instructed them to follow her. Her priority is their safety even if that means staying behind. 

She led them to a window and took a deep breath. [Name] looked at Gar, “Get on Conner's back.” 

“W-what?” Gar said with a shake of his head, “You want us to jump!”

[Name] freaked out, “Do you have a better idea? No? Okay then get on his back now!” John started crying and [Name] tried to calm the baby down, if she didn’t his power would react.

 Gar climbed onto Conner's back and Krypto began barking at the intruders. She was glad that she blocked the door with various furniture. [Name] looked around the walls for a certain button. She hoped she was in the right room or else they were screwed. 

“Bruce had installed an automatic zip-line to the next building in case we needed an easy getaway. This is how we’re going to escape.” She found the button which was near the window. [Name] should have looked there in the first and most obvious place. Her index finger pressed the button and there was a loud pop of a grappling hook shooting out to the next building.

 [Name] then attached the makeshift harness John was in to Gar’s back. “H-hey, what are you doing?” He asked holding onto Conner tightly. His eyes frantically looking at [Name] who focused on tightening the harness. The crying from John was getting louder. 

“I need to make sure that you guys get to the building safely and meanwhile holding back the intruders.” [Name] explained.

 “You are coming with us, aren’t you?” Conner asked looking over his shoulder and at her. He couldn’t leave her behind to fight those guys by herself. 

“I’ll be right behind you,” She promised and gave the boys a trolley which she found in a dresser. She hooked it onto the zip-line and looked at the boys. “No matter what, keep moving forward. Gar and Conner, if something does happen to me I need you to take John far away from here. Find Dick and the rest of the Titans. This is your mission from me.”

 “Why are you saying this? You said you’ll be right behind us.” Gar was getting anxious. The bangs on the blocked door getting louder with each passing second.

 [Name] gave the boys a hug and pressed a kiss onto John’s forehead. “Titans,” She looked at the boys with a determined look, “go.” 

Conner nodded his head and grabbed onto the bars of the trolley and jumped out of the window not looking back. Gar looked in front of him and braced himself for Conner was going to break the glass of the next building. There was a loud crash and Conner slid onto the concrete floor. 

Gar had jumped off of Conner's back and looked at the Titan’s Tower. He watched as [Name] grabbed another trolley and hooked it to the zip-line. Then he heard a helicopter and a light shined onto [Name]. 

She jumped out of the window and suddenly there was a bang. She was halfway when Gar watched as [Name] let her tight grip on the bars release and her eyes slowly close. He then saw someone jump out of the helicopter with a cord attached to them. 

Gar realized that [Name] had been tranquilized and her body was relaxed as she descended. Gar wanted to scream, but the soldier who jumped out of the helicopter successfully caught her. Then the helicopter flew away with the two hanging by the cord. 

Conner laid his hand on Gar’s shoulder, “We have to go.” Krypto whined in response looking up at Gar. He wiped his watery green eyes and nodded his head, “Yeah, we have a mission to complete.” 

......

TAGGED READERS

@eternaleviee​ @x-ximenas​ @gabytodd​ @terralupa​

#dick grayson #dick grayson x reader #dick grayson imagine #nightwing #nightwing x reader #nightwing imagine #Titans #dc titans #titans imagine #dc imagine #DC Universe #Buried Secrets #slight angst #boring action

[purplesurveys]

1149

A

What is your age? 22, but there’s less than a month to go before I turn 23.

What annoys you? Literally every single person who still supports the government at this point. For context, we are back to square one and we’re under the exact same quarantine imposed in March 2020 because of the surge in cases. Nothing has changed and nothing has been done in the last 365 days while people are getting hungrier and poorer. I’m done feeling hopeful for this country and I cannot wait to abandon it forever.

Do you have any allergies? Apparently, grass. Can’t be exposed to it for too long otherwise the skin on my thighs turn red and occasionally even get rashes.

B

Do you know anyone named Billy? Kind of, but they’re girls with their name spelled as Billie.

When is your birthday? April 21st and spending it in quarantine once again this year...

Who is your best friend(s)? Angela and Andi.

C

What's your favorite candy? I like gummy bears and worms. As for sweets, I really like Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, Butterfinger, Twix, and the Hershey’s Cookies and Creme bar.

When was the last time you cried? Maybe a day or two ago while watching a snippet from Caught in Providence.

Have you been out of the country? Yes.

D

Do you daydream? Not so much these days. I’ve been better at keeping my focus at work.

What's your favorite kind of dog? I love alllllll dogs, but I’d usually be wary of smaller dogs because 87% of the times I’ve met some, they’re aggressive or a bit moody. I don’t like stereotyping dogs as much as possible but because I’ve had direct experiences to back it up anyway, *shrug*

What day of the week is it? It’s a Sunday.

E

How do you like your eggs? Scrambled, poached, or an omelette with lots of fillings. Balut is also great.

Have you ever been in the emergency room? Only when I was born, I’m guessing.

What's the easiest thing ever to do? Idk, what comes easy to me might not be the same for others. But my answer would be to smile, regardless if it were genuine or otherwise.

F

Have you ever flown in a plane? Yeah, many times. The child-like excitement I get whenever I get on one will probably never go away, either.

Do you use fly swatters? No, my mom usually uses old shoebox covers or rolled-up scratch papers we have lying around to swat them.

Have you ever used a foghorn?: Only in video games lol, never in real life.

G

Have you pet a goat? I don’t think I have. I’ve pet lots of animals before but I don’t think a goat has been one of them yet.

Are you a giver or a taker? Giver, but I’ve been allowing myself to take more these days.

Do you like gummy candies? Love them.

H

How are you? We’ve entered summer weather now, so I feel hot and miserable. It’s also Sunday and I am stuck at home, which doesn’t make me the happiest camper.

What's your height? 5′1″ or a tiny tiny tiny bit taller than that.

What color is your hair? It’s black but on extremely rare occasions I’ll catch a single light brown strand when I play with my hair.

I

What's your favorite ice cream? Cookies and cream and chocolate chip cookie dough. My friend Leigh actually started her own ice cream shop recently and I bought her coffee crumble ice cream, and it is sooooooooo fuckinggggggggg good??????? It’s so rare to find coffee ice cream where I live period, so I’m fucking stoked to have a close friend who makes literally the best one and in generous servings too.

Have you ever ice skated? Many times as a kid. I was never formally trained, but it was something I wanted to try from watching other kids play in mall ice skating rinks; and when I did give it a shot, I ended up enjoying it. Luckily my mom was encouraging and actually frequently dropped me off at a rink so I can practice gliding and all for a few hours while she ran errands.

Have you cheated the IRS? That’s like an American tax thingy, right? We don’t have that here and my employer handles my TIN.

J

What's your favorite jelly bean? Not a big fan but if I had to have Jelly Belly, I obviously would want to get the pleasant-tasting ones.

Do you tell jokes? Yes.

Do you wear nice jewelry? Only on special occasions.

K

Do you want to kill anybody? I don’t want to kill anybody but I certainly wish a good number of public officials would finally die.

Do you want to have kids? Yes. I really wish I could still have a future with them. Thanks for the trauma, my real asshole of an ex.

Where did you have kindergarten? Somewhere.

L

Are you laidback? I doubt my friends would use this to describe me. I for sure lean more towards the uptight side of the spectrum.

Do you lie? Eh, occasionally.

When is the last time you sent a hand-written letter? I have no idea. Christmas 2019 maybe?

M

Ever talked in a microphone? Sure. Many times.

Do you still watch Disney Movies? I very rarely get in the mood for them if I’m by myself, but yes, I’d gladly sit down and watch should an opportunity come.

Do you like mangoes? No.

N

Do you have a nickname? 99% of people call me Robyn while my family calls me Byn, but there are a select few friends who’ve stayed long enough with me to catch other names I’ve gotten over the years, which have since become inside jokes/nicknames. There’s Reben and Rolayn, and literally just yesterday ‘Roby’ happened when I ordered food for lunch so that will probably catch on as well.

What’s your favorite number? 4.

Do you prefer night over day? Absolutely.

O

Are you an only child? No, I’m two siblings away from that status.

Do you wish this was over? I haven’t felt that way, no.

What is the closet orange object near you? An orange tumbler my Kuya gave me as a Christmas gift in 2019. There is also orange tape wrapped around the charger adaptor of my company laptop.

P

What one fear are you most paranoid about? Waking up in the middle of surgery and being unable to speak nor move.

Do you play any instruments? Nope.

Do you think you are pretty? Some days.

Q

Are you quick to judge people? No, unless they are already blatantly showing their character like being rude towards service staff, tossing their trash to the ground, or cutting in queues. Whenever those things happen I give myself the space and freedom to guiltlessly judge.

What do you keep quiet about? How dysfunctional my family really is, and the things I really want to say about Gabie.

Do you have any quirks? Food-wise, I like peeling off the breading from fried chicken and placing them on the side of my plate so I can eat them last, because they’re my favorite part.

R

What’s a good reason to cry? Frustration. Crying can be really helpful in lessening stress.

Do you think you're always right? No.

Do you watch reality TV? Not religiously, but I love watching snippets of reality shows on Facebook because they’re all so embarrassing and it’s hilarious to watch hahahahah. Literally last night I was watching clips of Big Ed on 90 Day Fiance.

S

Are you a social person? More so now than I was years ago.

What states have you lived in? I lived in Manila briefly but it didn’t take long till we transferred to another city for a more peaceful life in the suburbs.

What is your favorite season? I wanna say winter because of what I’ve seen from it in movies and shows, but I’ve never actually experienced it before.

T

When did you last sleep in a tent? Sometime in March or April last year.

Do you like tomatoes? Mostly in diced form. Tomato sauce is fine but I don’t really like it in my pasta. Bloody Mary also tastes rather awful.

What time did you wake up? 8:30 AM.

U

Do you have an umbrella in your car? I think so, yeah. I finally placed one in there lmao.

Do listen to Usher? Eh, not really. 2000s R&B isn’t my thing, save for Beyoncé.

Describe the underwear your wearing? It’s light blue.

V

What’s the worst veggie? I never learned to like pechay. I’d still eat it, but only because I like cleaning up my entire plate.

Do you like movies with violence? Some. Like I hate action movies but I enjoyed A Clockwork Orange and Scream lol.

Where do you want to go on vacation? I recently bookmarked an Airbnb in Zambales and the accommodation is basically this super cute line of tipi-styled huts by the beach. I'd love to have a solo trip push through once this Covid mess subsides.

W

Ever been on a wave runner? No.

Where do you work? I work in a PR company.

Do you wish on stars? Just sometimes.

X

Have you ever had an x-ray? Only for mandatory medical exams.

Do you own a xylophone? I think I had a toy one as a kid, but it’s not with me anymore.

Have you watched the x-games? No, not interested.

Y

What did you do yesterday? I stayed at home; ordered food for Angela as a surprise; debated if I should buy a pair of Air Maxes – and ultimately decided I’ve already spent too much this month to deserve a new pair of shows lol; and just settled to buy a new night lamp for my bedroom. I also watched the newest episode of 2 Days 1 Night and ate more of Leigh’s ice cream while doing work.

Do you like the color yellow? Only in mustard yellow. I also like the song Yellow, heh.

What year were you born?: 1998.

Z

Do you believe in the zodiac? No.

Has your bank account been at zero? No. I remember when I was first opening my own account at the bank and the clerk told me to make sure I don’t go below P2,000, and my intensely by-the-book ass has been following the rule ever since, even though my dad has told me it’s absolutely fine to go below it so long as I have P2,000 back in the account after a month hahaha.

Ever been to the zoo? A few.

#survey #surveys

[luminousbeansarewe]

what are your takes/version of how the sequel trilogy went down? because i also have my own version in my head, not.... that, but im really interested in the ideas other people have had for it

hoo boy there’s a lot of ground to cover here lmao i will try to keep them as short as i can... i also enjoy multiple versions of events and outcomes for the sequels as long as they’re in-character so i’m not trying to say no other version of the sequels is good or cool bc only a sith deals in absolutes amirite? (i won’t apologize for that dumb joke.) first the jumping-off points:

first of all, i fully support Force-sensitive Finn. even if he didn’t become a full-blown Jedi, if the entire concept of the Jedi was reforged and we don’t see him become the kind of Jedi we saw in the prequels (more on that later), i see him as someone who was attuned to the Force in a way that is similar to how i conceive of Barriss; empathetic to the suffering and joy of others. this would drive him to defect from the Empire and fear it, too. i also saw him becoming a reluctant leader for the rebellion, and there’s a GREAT fic which i’ll link here that riffs on the idea that he creates a spark within the stormtrooper ranks and more and more of them begin to defect... which i love

Rey being a nobody is cool to me. the ONE character moment where she became super relatable for me was when she realized how frightened she was of her own Force abilities. but i don’t think she has to be the legacy of Palps to have that. she doesn’t need supercharged powers to be spooked by them in a post-Jedi Order world where the most recent memory anybody has of the Force is Vader. (also Rey being a Kenobi seems more out of character for Obi-Wan than anything else lol he was pretty committed to the ways of the Order even after they were destroyed, plus he already had one kid to furtively watch over... just imo). this also ties into my expansion on the Force.

Poe being not a carbon copy of Han. i think Leia looked after him, found him somehow after she sent Ben to the Jedi Academy and was a motherly figure in his life. i like the idea that he was a little shit, and she’s the one who taught him to turn his reactive defiance of authority into bravery when fighting for the rebels. i think he looked up to her, wanted to be a leader like her. i saw him in the position of generals like Akbar by the end, as he learns to balance risk-taking with steady leadership. I wanted to see that growth, how those leaders are formed, see Leia get to impart her wisdom to someone. (also i fully support Finn/Poe and Finn/Rey/Poe, i’m not a committed shipper so i’m down with no romance at all between them but those ships are choice af and Stormpilot is all Oscar Isaac wanted anyway, so...) plus can u imagine the dichotomy of Ben the fallen son with Poe, the “adopted” son who became what Ben couldn’t? the guilt of Leia for not knowing how to teach her son about the Force, doing better half-raising a nobody who had the same shitty attitude as Han when they met but no Force ability? THIS IS JUICY CHARACTER CONTENT

Rose was given cheesy lines to introduce an important topic: that fighting is all well and good but throwing away your principles defeats the purpose of the fight in the first place (an important theme in the Clone Wars era, too.) she was there to be the voice of the truly little people in the gffa, who we don’t hear much about in the other trilogies. Finn’s sensitivity puts him at risk of the sorrow-to-hate arc i described for Barriss; Rose is there to be the empathy that sustains hope rather than becomes a crushing weight. i love the idea that she might rally volunteers from blue-collar places (like... Lothal, for example?) and spearhead the notion that the New Republic should be very different from the old one, calling out the fact that working conditions didn’t change with the shift from republic to empire and the First Order simply took it to an extreme that left her and her sister with nothing else to lose.

Ben Solo, hoo boy. so here’s the thing, we don’t KNOW Ben Solo. we were expected to want him to be redeemed because he was the son of Han and Leia, and that’s it. that’s lazy as fuck. him killing Han in the first movie (if it happened it should have been in movie #2, that’s how fucking second acts work) was an excuse to shock people, subvert the ‘i can’t kill my own father’ thing, and make sure we knew he was “evil” even though we’re supposed to also want a redemption arc? you have to read the Rise of Kylo Ren comics to learn that he was a) hounded by the voice of Snoke in his head from childhood, manipulated by it, which is horrific bc it’s like grooming... or b) that he felt HUGE pressure as a legacy Force-user to save the galaxy, lead the New Jedi Order, etc. these are much more empathy-generating and we should have learned them in TFA. echoes of Anakin much? which is why i think him being redeemed in a way other than self-sacrifice (which made sense for Vader given his long history of being a terrible person, knowing it was too late for him in the end, and really just wanting to save his son rather than “become good again”) is more interesting than him just falling (which is too much the same as the prequels.)

it should have been Finn’s call, a moment of Truth that held the balance of Finn as either falling prey to darkness or learning forgiveness, whether or not Kylo got redeemed. Finn and Rey working together to get to that point while Rose and Poe took on the military aspect of the Big Finale would have been great. Finn with a lightsaber to Kylo’s throat, feeling the temptation to murder him instead of making him face what he’s become in a meaningful way? Rey trying to urge him away from darkness as she’s been tempted before, but this is the first time Finn’s really been tested, and he was the one who so often reminded her of her own humanity? Rey calling up Rose’s point of creating a new paradigm instead of recreating the old one, of Poe’s growth or Leia’s willingness to take Ben back showing it’s possible? shiiiiiiit

the rest is going under a cut!

SO... given those things as a basis...

there being no scene where Force-ghost Anakin bops Kylo on the head (but you know, more subtly and with gorgeous metaphor ofc) was a travesty. we needed some version of that, also imo that reaffirms that Anakin was the chosen one... as him redirecting his grandson away from that path would be restoring hella balance

Snoke should have had his own fucked up backstory, if he was even there at all. a dark sider fucking with Ben Solo is reasonable to me, but Snoke could have been someone who looked up to Palps as much as Kylo supposedly looked up to Vader. that would have been interesting... maybe there are multiple “nobodies” who are being touched by the Force, just like there always were in the prequels era, but some are going dark with no Jedi to try to convince them otherwise? or, maybe Snoke’s life was ruined by the Empire and he chose to become the beast that harmed him, whereas Kylo becomes the version where you think you want to do that but then realize that it’s just as bad and you still have empathy and regret what you’ve done?

Thrawn being the main military antagonist, since they couldn’t be arsed to make Hux into anything but a sniveling baby fascist (despite his really upsetting backstory of an abusive father, also found in the comics... noticing a trend here?). Thrawn was already established and beloved in the legends. why would you not use him. whY?? he’s like a foil for Tarkin. contention between him and the Force-users in charge (Snoke and Kylo) would have been VERY interesting, esp with the character of Thrawn in the new canon seeing the Empire as a ‘necessary evil’ and now maybe having the potential to make it into something else? how’s JOINING WITH THE NEW REPUBLIC for a subversion of the classic tropes, Rian?????? you fucker????

if Thrawn’s history is “too storied” for a bunch of cowards to "fit” into a new movie trilogy, invent another antivillain to take Thrawn’s place whose history is a little more concurrent with the sequel era... you cowards

Luke fucking off after his failure isn’t out of character IMO. he was THE STRONGEST JEDI EVER and his star pupil still fell? maybe he broke under the same pressure Ben did. maybe that’s what allows him to reach back out towards Kylo and reconnect, admitting his failure. i want to hear more about him cutting himself off from the Force bc i LOVE KOTOR 2 and Kreia, but maybe that’s too much for one trilogy to delve into meaningfully, i dunno

Han fucking off after Ben wrecked the temple isn’t OOC either. i think Han was always a little frightened of the Force, the way many non-sensitives are. I think he was critical as a father, because he was critical of himself and Han is the king of projection. i wanted more of the dysfunctional relationship between him and Ben.

if Kylo kills Han, the scene needs to show more of the fact that Kylo actually regretted it, which Snoke only alludes to in TLJ, foreshadowing his future. i rewrote Han’s death scene for a friend and got a lot of good feedback about it so maybe i’ll post it here sometime. i can get behind a version where he doesn’t die, too, i just haven’t fleshed it out in my own head.

i like the idea that the Jedi Order needed to be remade, and that Luke saw the failure of the old order when he saw Ben turn like so many of the Jedi in the Order did. i like that Rey and Finn might spearhead this, and maybe Kylo’s role is to know the dark side intimately enough now that he can actually teach how it works, how to deal with it... how inevitable its temptation is. because...

in this canon, i don’t think the Force has light or darkness. i think it’s Force-users who do. it is their internal landscapes which cause them to “fall” or be redeemed or not, after all. Finn can attest to the same, so can Rey and Luke... so like, all the Jedi need DBT therapy or something i guess. lmao hold the dialectic, you nerds

the Force has shown time and time again that it cannot be “balanced” so maybe it is ourselves who need to become balanced instead

the Force is chaos, a never-ending series of colliding butterfly effects that to us will always and inevitably be seen as turmoil, cause and effect on a cosmic scale. if you drink too greedily of its power, or try to exert total control over it, by its nature it will consume you because it is beyond your mortal ken. whatever you hunger for, the force will give you more and more of it until you are overwhelmed, drowning in it

this is why peace was a central teaching of the Jedi... peace, the antithesis of chaos, which can only ever be created from within, the eye of the storm which must be sought time and time again

anyway thanks for coming to my ted talk? i’m always down to hear other people’s ideas for these characters tbh. and always down to get more into these topics if you want to know more... esp as it relates to the failure of the Jedi Order, or KOTOR 2 and Revan and Kreia, or OF COURSE my OCs because Sol has a very interesting relationship with the Force.

thank you for this ask lordimperius!! ^_^

#star wars sequels #this got way deeper into my meta than i meant for it to but i can't help it #my headcanons #asks #if you read all of this or even most of it you're an actual angel

[trueishcolours]

The ‘what if a different VK had love spelled Ben in Descendants 1′ post nobody asked for

Having Mal be the one to spell Ben doesn’t JUST boil down to ‘she’s the protag, so she gotta’ - there’s also the fact that she’s the most committed to the ‘steal-the-wand’ plot, while Evie is following her mother’s more small-scale plan to ‘find a prince with a big castle,’ and the boys are...honestly pretty ready to just fit in. No wonder Mal doesn’t want to give any of them a key role in the plot when she has to keep dragging them back into the plot! But Mal is arguably also the worst choice for doing a seduction plot. Evie is better at performing romance, and Carlos and Jay are both more comfortable with actual affection. Plus those three’s ambivalence towards Maleficent’s plan makes the plot splinter in interesting ways. So here I go! 

Carlos: Probably the most straightforward. He is the only VK besides Mal to get a solo scene and relationship with Ben in D1, and what do we see in that scene? Ben being reassuring, Carlos opening up about the Isle, Ben making a clumsy attempt at giving affection which nonetheless goes over pretty well with Carlos. Carlos is also the first of the Core Four to say that going to Auradon might not be so bad, and, if we go with book canon, had the hardest time on the Isle, so he’s really got no incentive not to crack immediately under the onslaught of Ben Affection. I reckon in a universe where Carlos was the one love-spelling Ben, we’d see him falling in love a lot quicker than Mal (who’s still ambivalent in D2, after all!) and then dealing with a LOT of guilt over manipulating Ben. He’d probably try to talk the others out of the want plan before the coronation. Though he does have a core of steel and a loyalty to his friends that might keep him committed to the plan for longer, keeping things more interesting...

Evie: Probably the most emotionally interesting for me. In order to talk about what would happen here, I need to talk for a moment about what happened between Ben and Audrey. As we see in D3, Audrey is under tremendous pressure to marry Ben for her family’s sake, which means that she feels the need to constantly curate and perform their relationship, rather than letting Ben have the actual relationship he wants to have with her. If she thinks he’s not performing the relationship properly, she’ll correct him too, discouraging him from supporting the VKs because she doesn’t think it’s the right idea. This leads to moments like that scene where Audrey’s complaining about Mal’s magic, which is a scene I actually think about A LOT. For a moment, Audrey slips and reveals an ACTUAL INSECURITY (’if everyone looks good, then where will I be?’) Ben’s response? He goes to reassure her, but before he can get the words out, Audrey’s got her mask back in place; she cuts him off and changes the subject. Ben wants a true partnership with Audrey, but she can’t relax enough to actually open and let him, leaving him so emotionally dissatisfied that he’s primed for Mal to steal him away. 

(When you think about it, Ben’s story is a constant pattern of him trying to give love and care to people who won’t accept it. First Audrey, who won’t stop performing for him, then Mal, who is afraid of connection, struggles to trust that he loves the real her and, by D2, is performing for him as well, and even Uma, who (quite reasonably!) mistrusts his offers of cooperation. But this is not a Ben post.)

So, what’s Audrey got to do with Evie? I can see Evie/Ben going wrong in exactly the same way as Audrey/Ben, because Evie and Audrey are actually people with very similar goals - marry a prince to please your (grand)mother. It would probably go wrong a lot more slowly with Evie than with Audrey, because Audrey is quite openly domineering, whereas Evie is more sweet-natured and, in D1, more needy, so it would probably take Ben longer to realise that she wasn’t truly letting him in. Which leaves us time for some deliciously slow-burn angst. 

The central tension in a Ben/Evie Descendants would probably come from Evie debating whether to go for the wand or just try for marriage with Ben. After all, her personal goal was to marry a prince, and there’s not much point in that if he then loses his throne in a bloody revolution when you release all the villains on the Isle. So she’s wondering whether to just keep her new prince and her three friends, or whether to try for the wand, and meanwhile the guilt is slowwwwwly creeping up that she’s using and manipulating this prince who she’s actually starting to care for...

I think Evie would twist in the wind for a lot longer than Carlos, or even Mal, because unlike both of them she’s actually been brought up to manipulate a man into falling in love with her. There’s a double-bind which Audrey and a lot of real-life women who’ve been raised on traditional femininity fall into, where you’re taught simultaneously that True Love is real and happens spontaneously and feels wonderful - and that you must work constantly to deserve it, achieve it, and keep your man in it. So when Evie starts to have feelings for Ben, she will want to give into them, and at the same time she won’t trust that his kindness towards her will continue unless she makes it. She simultaneously believes in the dream and the nightmare. And meanwhile Ben is just bathing her in the above-mentioned ‘let me love youuuuuuu’ energy...

...maybe I need to write this AU. 

Jay: So, if Evie is the natural choice to love-spell Ben because love-spelling Ben actually aligns with her personal goals, Jay is the natural choice in that he’s already the group honey trap. Seriously, guys; Jay is the only one of you who is comfortable with casual flirting and does it on the regular. I don’t know why you didn’t give him the job that literally requires flirting.

It’s the heteronormativity. 

This one is tough, because we really learn almost nothing about Jay in canon, so I’m going to have to go off my own interpretations. I see Jay as the group protector, both physically and emotionally. He wraps his arms around them when they think they’re going to be driven into the sea; he goes to fight Maleficent before anybody else; in D2, when Harry kidnaps Ben, he taunts Jay specifically for failing to stop him. For emotional protection, see the scene in D1 where the Core Four Skype their parents. Jay manages everybody’s feelings in that scene. When Carlos starts snapping at Cruella, Jay puts an arm around him, drawing him away from a confrontation that he knows isn’t worth having, then keeps that arm round him for the rest of the scene. As the parents squabble amongst themselves, we see Evie start to look more and more distressed - and Jay notice her distress, struggle for a moment, then make the snap decision to cut off the call. And through it all, he’s aware that Fairy Godmother may be surprised at how much their parents suck, and upset that her idea for a call turned out to be a bad one, so he immediately turns to manage her feelings too - ‘thanks for the special treat.’ He’s like the eldest sibling in a dysfunctional family at Christmas dinner, managing conflict, pulling the plug, apologising for his family to the guests. So what I want to know in all this is, when do JAY’S emotional needs get met???

Ben whispering let me love youuuuuuuuuuu in the background...

So I’m not saying that fake-dating Ben would destroy Jay instantly, I’m just saying that, for all his character arc is supposed to be about discovering the meaning of teamwork, he seems to leave the Isle with a better sense of what it means to care for others than any of the other three. And when he suddenly finds himself BATHED IN CARING rather than having to DO all the caring...well, it’s just a question of who out of him and Carlos would crack quicker. Judging by the fact that Jay was the first one to actually voice any doubts about the plan to Mal, I’m going to say it’s him. Boy would MELT.

(Fun addendum: Jay is sexy and he knows it. Can we get some of him being worried at first that Ben only likes him as arm candy, then later really enjoying being Ben’s arm candy once he knows that Ben loves him for himself?)

Let’s round off this LONGBOI post by talking about the carriage scene, where Ben reveals that he knew he was spelled. ‘I haven’t been faking anything.’ Immortal words. Jesus fuck, Ben, why are you so bad at self-care and boundaries? So for Mal, this line doesn’t only make her feel bad, it makes her feel trapped. While obviously it’s awkward to find out that somebody who you’re about to betray loves you for real, for Mal Ben’s declaration of love would be inherently undesirable, even without the context, because Mal doesn’t want love, or at least thinks she doesn’t. 

Evie, meanwhile, does want love - or at least thinks she does. So her reaction to ‘I haven’t been faking anything’ would be less ‘oh God, somebody is emotionally vulnerable to me, how do I respond, am I capable of reciprocating’ and more ‘oh God, I desperately want to believe him but I don’t know if I dare’ (see above-mentioned performativeness). 

Carlos and Jay, meanwhile, are much more uncomplicated about accepting love than either Mal or Evie. For them, realising Ben loved them for real would be a straightforward betrayal-and-guilt kind of deal. ‘I haven’t been faking anything’ would kill them both instantly. 

#descendants #evie grimhilde #jay son of jafar #carlos de vil #ben florian #monstrous blogs