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#it means a whole lot is what I'm trying to say haha
silvers-starrway · 1 month
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So the wildest thing happened where @mactheactor decided to dub over (if that's even the correct terminology) the Chaos Sonic animation I made!!!!
I'm still in utter awe about this like, hands down the coolest thing ever I've been thinking about this non-stop. Hope y'all enjoy it as much as I do!!
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what are the chances my dad (known music nerd especially when it comes to bass) would be aware of any of the context or lore around Dark Alley
#like would it be super concerning for me to send it to him and go haha emo song but like I relate to it a lot :')#which I feel like saying that HERE is terribly concerning bc of the Lore (Pete post suicide attempt playing the demo to heychris#and the whole ''way too personal to play live'' thing)#but I don't mean it in a suicidal way at all I mean it in the ''looking in the mirror and not liking what you see'' way#like I suck most of the time. I'm negative and mean and it makes me SO angry that the main solution#is to focus on being grateful bc why should I be grateful when it feels like everything sucks??#and then I blame other people for my own bad behavior and feelings bc I struggle to take responsibility without#trying to explain myself when really I just need to listen and learn from the people trying to help me#and I'm just so so pessimistic and I wish I wasn't. I know I'm a horrible person and my attitude sucks and I hate that#but the LAST thing I want is to die. I just want to be better!! immediately!!! I hate that it's such a slow process!!#I never see any progress!! I just make the same bad choices over and over and then resolve to change again and again#and it just doesn't get better!! I never learn!!! but I want to so so badly!!!#I want to be good and okay and not a jerk to people irl but I hate everything and everything sucks in my perception#and I want SO badly to change that. I don't want to die I want to live and be better!!!!#anyway. how many red flags would it set off if I sent my dad this song
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spotsspeciall · 5 months
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Factory meetings - LN4
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vol. 2
Lando Norris x fem!reader
summary: Lando makes a move to Red Bull for 2024 and you work in the Red Bull factory. You meet him, and he’s a dick. But something inside you, needs him. 
Notes: Shoutout to @f1goat and the “His teammate” series, for the inspiration!!  Fair warning, I'm talking alittle shit about McLaren, but I am a McLaren girly and It’s all lies, I mean nothing by it! I also made up some gibberish about the car, since I don’t know how everything really works haha. This was also longer than I expected, but I can honestly say I'm pretty proud of it.
warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI. smut, unprotected (wrap it before you tap it folks!) p in v, pet names, language.
word count: 7.3k
masterlist
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You had been working at the Red Bull factory in Milton Keynes for 2 years. After getting your degree in mechanical engineering, you grabbed the first opening in Red Bull. And now you had built your way up to your current position. 
You were sitting on the chair, staring at the little metal pieces in front of you. Trying to figure out the best way to puzzle them together, and make the most out of the car.
Your job was to plan, and build components in the car. And when you gained your current position at the factory, you helped with the success of the RB19. 
Working in the factory, you rarely met the drivers. They were here a lot for the simulator and meetings, but your paths rarely crossed. You didn’t need to have contact with the drivers, so you didn’t. Only seeing them from afar, when the whole factory came together for a meeting.
Monday morning, just over a week since the last race in Abu-dhabi, the RB19 had been a huge success. And you were working hard to finish the last details on the RB20 before the new season, working even harder than you did on the RB19. Trying to make the RB20 even better, as impossible as that sounds. 
You had a goodbye party for Checo on Friday, as he was retiring. And Christian Horner had announced that Lando Norris was taking his seat.
You had never met Lando, only seen him when you watched the races. And from what you had heard about him, he was kind of a dick. 
You and the other women working for Red Bull had formed a strong bond, you and the Red Bull media girl, Sophie, were basically best friends. And since she was on the track every race weekend, she had some encounters with Lando. 
She said he was constantly grumpy. He only cared about racing, and the fact that he hadn’t had a win yet, already being in McLaren for 5 years, it started taking a toll on him. 
He used to be a kind and sweet person. Loving to chat to people, and loving the interaction with his fans. He was just an all around loving guy. But when his fist win never came, and 
The McLaren car never got faster. He turned mean and angry, and stopped caring about anything other than racing. And when Christian gave him a nice offer to fill Checo’s seat, he jumped on it, no hesitation. 
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You picked up your tools and started assembling the pieces again, to see if your mind had any ideas. 
You had your normal shitty Monday morning, and you didn’t have time to properly get ready. So you were sitting here in the Red Bull work clothes, your hair was up, but it had fallen out of your bun and was falling in your face, and you kept trying to pull it behind your ears. You didn’t have time for either makeup or to put your contacts in, so it was glasses today. But it wasn’t that bad, everyone saw you like this every Monday (and most other days too)
But what you didn’t know was that Lando was visiting the Factory today. To have a tour of the factory, and meet everyone working there. You didn’t hear the door open as you were staring a whole into the piece you just assembled. But you did hear your name being called. 
You turned around and met the eyes of Christian, but your eyes quickly looked over at the man standing beside him. You hurried to stand up and rip the gloves off your hands. Stretching out your hand to shake his. It seemed like he hesitated for a bit before shaking it, staring into your eyes the whole time. 
“I’m Y/N, nice to meet you”
“Lando”
Yeah, he seemed pretty grumpy. 
As you pulled your hand away, Christian started explaining who you were, and what your job was. You didn’t know if Lando was even listening because he was still just staring at you. 
Christian then turned to you and asked you how the work was going. 
“Oh yeah!” You were blocking their view of the piece, so you turned to walk around the table to show them. 
You started explaining what the piece was and what your goal for it was, as you put on a new pair of gloves to show them the piece. 
Putting it back down, Lando looked back at you. A small smile had made its way to his lips. 
“Is that going in my car?”
“Well yeah, it’s going in both cars”
“But, I’ll only drive the car if you’re the one working on it” He was now smirking at you and turned to Christian. “I’m serious” His smirk was gone.
“Don’t worry Lando, I’ll make sure of it” He said with a smile as he patted his shoulder. “We should move on to look at the paint booths” 
As they headed towards the door, Lando turned around before he left. His face was unreadable, and he had a look in his eyes you had never seen. You had never been more confused, and it took you a while to get back into the right headspace for you to finally crack the code.
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There were only a few days left before Christmas break, and you hadn’t seen Lando since that first time. 
Today had been a stressful day as you tried to do as much as you could in the little time you had left. You were standing in front of the computer, looking at the readings from a recent test, and there were a few numbers off. The frustration got to you, and you pulled off your glasses, rubbing the bride of your nose. Before you shoved the keyboard away and buried your face in your arms on the desk as you groaned in frustration. 
Lando had one last visit to the simulator before break. And before he left for the day, he decided to see if you were there. He was mesmerized by you when he first saw you. Your hair was falling in your face, and the glasses framed your face perfectly. He noticed that you had no makeup on, but you were absolutely breathtaking. And when you started talking about your work, he saw the passion in your eyes. He felt a small pull in his chest, and felt like his old happy self for just a moment when he looked at you. 
But it quickly disappeared, and he realized his new mission. He needed to have you. 
When he opened the door, he heard a groan as he saw your face land in your arms on the desk. The desk was quite high, and as you were bent over it, your ass was on display for him. 
He had to fight himself to not go right over and touch you. But he still walked over and leaned on the desk beside you.
“Something wrong baby?”
You quickly looked up, shocked that someone was in the room with you, and why were they calling you “baby”?
When you met Lando’s eyes, you rolled your own. You had already made up your mind about him, and you were not surprised he was acting like this. 
You heard a low chuckle coming from him as he saw you rolling your eyes. 
You leaned closer to him, really close. He could feel your breath.
“Don’t call me baby”
You could see he was a little shocked at the closeness, so you smirked to yourself and stretched your hand out to grab your glasses that had landed beside him. 
Leaning back, you put your glasses on. “And if you must know, I didn’t get the result I wanted” 
You pointed to the numbers on the screen. His mouth was slightly open as he still looked a little shocked, but he turned his head to look at the numbers. 
“I don’t know what any of the numbers mean” He turned to look at you.
You laughed before replying “Yeah, I know” 
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After closing your front door and throwing yourself on the couch. You pulled up your phone and sent a text to your best friend Sophie. 
“Lando came by the Factory today and called me baby…”
She answered right away.
"BRO!"
“No way!”
“He’s probably trying to get in your pants”
“WHAT?”
“NO HE IS NOT”
“He’s probably just trying to get a reaction out of me”
“Why would he want to get in my pants when he has models drooling over him?”
“Stop it Y/N”
“You are literally drop dead gorgeous.”
“Lando wishes he could get you! But don’t let him use you like that!”
“hahahaha”
“You’re the best Sophie”
“But yeah, he will not be getting anywhere near these sexy pants!”
“YEAHHHH GIRL”
“go piss girl”
“hahaha”
Closing your phone, you laughed to yourself. And when you laid down in bed, and closed your eyes. You couldn’t help when your sleepy brain started thinking about him. 
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You looked down. Seeing your naked body, tits jumping at the movement you were making. You saw your hands spread out on the lower abdomen of the man under you. You saw his hands groping your thighs, hips, tits. And when one of his hands traveled up to grab your jaw, you met his eyes. Lando. 
Waking up, you sat up in bed, hand flying to your jaw.
As your breathing calmed down, you realized the dream. Running the images through your head over and over again. And that's when you noticed just how turned on you were. Your panties totally soaked, and you felt hot.
Landing back in bed you groaned.
“Fuck you brain. That was so fucked up”
You rubbed your hands over your face before getting out of bed. Just a few more days of work before break. 
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Your brain had sneaked in thoughts about Lando all through the break, much to your dismay. And he always showed up when you were close to an orgasm by your own hand. And one time, his name slipped out in a whisper. But you would try to deny yourself that it ever happened. 
And when it was time to go back to work, you felt like it had been long enough for you to forget everything, just praying you didn’t have to see him for a while.
And you were lucky for once. The end of January was nearing, and you had yet to see him. But you knew it was not long before you would.
The start of February was when the car was launching. And you had worked your ass off to finish the last bits, and the tests and readings were good, great even. 
There would be a reveal of the finished car in the factory, for all employees, before it was going to be a public launch. And you knew reveal day meant Lando. But you would be fine, all of the employees would be there, no way you would have any contact with him. 
And when the day finally arrived you were excited. The RB20 was going to be revealed, a car you helped make, and that was all you could focus on. 
You and Sophie were standing together up at the front of the crowd, looking at the car covered in a protective sheet. Christian got up beside the car and started his speech, and then he reached the moment where he introduced the two drivers for the team. Max Verstappen, the reigning world champion, and the new Lando Norris.
As he walked up beside the car, he was dressed in the Red Bull racing suit, and you couldn’t help but admire him in it. It wasn’t wrong to think the man looked good, incredibly good. You knew he was still an asshole, but you did have eyes. 
Max had his speech, and then it was Lando’s turn. It was a good speech, talking about how he was ready for something new, a more competitive car. He then started thanking the people working on the car, and he locked eyes with you, and held it until he was finished speaking. 
Lando and Max then lifted the sheet off the car to reveal it. And the crowd started clapping. You marveled at the car for a minute, feeling proud. But you felt his eyes on you. So you looked back at him, and you saw that stupid smirk on his face, he then had the audacity to give you a wink. You rolled your eyes at him, and when you looked back at him, he had a genuine smile on his face, and a glint in his eyes. And for just a moment, butterflies fluttered in your stomach, before you were interrupted with Christian speaking again.
You were standing in front of the car, looking down at it in admiration. The “party” had been moved to a different room, where food and drinks were served. And when you found a quiet moment, you slipped away to go look at the car. 
You were all alone as you squatted down to get a better look at the car, and the details of it. You couldn’t believe you had a hand in building it. This was Max’s car, with the big, red number 1 on it.
Standing back up, you felt a hand slide its way to your lower back. Shocked, you turned to look at the person beside you. Of course. Lando. 
He had that typical smirk on his face as he spoke to you in a low tone. 
“Hope you did a lot of work on my car too” “I was serious when I said I will only drive it if you have”
You rolled your eyes again, it was something he really brought out of you. 
“I have!” You put on some fake excitement in your tone. “I even put a little extra work into your car” You gave him a suggestive wink.
“Oh, so my car might be a little faster?” He said in a hushed tone, like you were sharing a secret. 
“Yeah” You nodded at him, and pointed to the car in front of you. “This is your car right?”
He narrowed his eyes at you. “No, this is Max’s”
“Oh shit, guess I put it in the wrong car then” You shrugged your shoulders as you couldn’t hold your laughter anymore. 
You turned to walk away, leaving the hold he still had on your lower back. The place where his hand had been was burning hot. And when he saw you taking quick steps to get away, he hurried to follow after you. 
“Baby, that was not nice” He said with a small pout as he finally caught up with you. 
You stopped in your tracks. “I told you to stop calling me that” 
“Oh you look cute when you’re angry” His amusement was clear on his face. 
If you weren’t angry before, you sure were now. You groaned as you started walking away from him again. And before you entered the door to the party, he shouted to you.
“Can’t wait to see you again soon baby!” You could hear the grin on his face. But you just opened the door and walked inside, hoping to not see him for the rest of the night.
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Just a week after, you were back at work, looking over some data on the computer, when you heard a knock at the door, and then it opened and closed. 
Turning around, you were met with Christian. “Oh hey Christian!” “Wasn't expecting you to be here!”
He smiled at you, “I am here to ask if you’re free to have a meeting in my office?”
“Right now?”
He looked down at the expensive watch around his wrist. “Yes”
“Um, yeah sure!” “I’m just going to-” You trailed off as you pressed a few buttons on the computer, before turning it off and walking towards Christian. “Shall we?”
Sitting down in the chair opposite his desk, it all started to become a little intimidating. You waited for him to speak as he looked at a few papers, before lifting his head and meeting your eyes. 
“Y/N” “First, I want to formally thank you for your work on the RB19. You made the car what it was. Great work” “And I also want to thank you for the work you’ve put into the RB20. I know it will be even better than the 19” He smiled at you, and you smiled back as you nodded, silently thanking him for his words. 
He continued, “I have been talking with Lando Norris, and after he had a test in the car, and felt how it worked. And after he also saw how you worked on it, he has asked for you to be his no.1 mechanic.” He paused, waiting for your response.
“No.1 mechanic? as in, at every race, in the garage, being the head mechanic on his car?” You were shocked, confused.
“Yes.” He gave you a warm smile. “When he suggested it, I totally agreed.” “It would be a perfect job for you, and with all the work you have put in, the least I can do for you is to give you a chance to be with the car at every race.” “So, do you want the job?”
You didn’t even think about the fact that Lando was the one to suggest the job for you. You just focused on the fact that you could be the no.1 mechanic. 
“Yes” “Yes I do.” A big smile grew on your face.
“Perfect!” Christian clapped his hands together, and picked up the papers he previously looked at. “Take the time you need to read through them before signing” 
Taking the papers in your hands, you read through it. And everything looked perfect. So you signed where you needed to. And handed the papers back to Christian. 
“Thank you so much for this opportunity!” “I can’t wait to get started” You couldn’t stop smiling.
“Good!” “Can’t wait to see you on the track”
He then told you the plan heading forwards. You had plenty of meetings coming up. You needed to know what to expect in the garage. And you had a few meetings with the people working in the garage. And after all of that was finished, you were headed to the pre-season testing in Bahrain. 
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Arriving in Bahrain, you felt prepared. And you were even more happy to finally join Sophie at work, as you walked into the garage together. 
Testing had been going pretty great so far, you only needed to do a few tweaks on the car to see if the performance was different. 
On the other end, Lando had been tolerable. He had his usual flirty, teasing persona around you. But now that you worked together in a small garage, he had toned it down a bit, much to your pleasure. 
But when you got a moment alone, he always sneaked up on you and rested his hand on your lower back, called you baby, and did everything to annoy you. Much to your frustration.
You had been single for a few years. And you hadn’t slept with too many people after. But now it had been a really long time since last. Too busy at work to even care, but you were growing more and more pent up and frustrated. And this asshole resting his hand on your lower back was not helping. It was also not helping that he looked drool worthy all the time.
What was helping, was the fact that he was just that, an asshole. But you had no excuse for yourself when you were alone at night, and you just stopped caring. It made you cum fast, and you were happy with that. So you kept thinking about him every time, while whispering his name under your breath. 
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It was the fourth race of the season, and you were in Japan. The previous races were good to Lando, who had gotten a podium on each one, but no win yet. But he was good in Japan, he knew this could be the one.
It was early on Thursday, and when Lando walked into the garage, he found you working on the car, alone. 
You were so focused as you lay bent over the nose of the car, trying to screw something that was in a tricky position. When Lando saw the sight of you like that, bent over, legs spread, he felt his dick twitch. 
He quickly turned his head to look around for the sign of any people, seeing no one, he walked up to you, close enough so your feet were almost touching. Looking down at you, he noticed you still didn’t know he was there, so he cleared his throat to get your attention. 
When you heard the sound, it spooked you, and you went to stand up from the compromising position you were in. But you didn’t know someone was standing right behind you. So when you lifted yourself off the car, your ass hit something, someone. You felt a pair of strong hands grab onto your hips to stabilize the both of you, as your back was now flush against his chest. When you looked down at his hands, you saw his watch and bracelets and immediately knew who it was. 
You heard a low groan coming from him, right by your ear. And you felt a bulge grow right where your ass was resting against his crotch. You panicked, and shoved yourself back to knock his balance off so he would get off you. When he did, you turned around to look at him with anger in your eyes.
“What the fuck was that Norris!?”
You didn’t even let him answer before you turned to storm out. Two reasons why. First, you were flustered and could feel your face heat up, and you did not want him to see that. Second, feeling his hands hold your waist, and the bulge grow in his pants, you were already soaked and horny beyond belief, and you did not want to be around him in a state like that. 
Lando stood there, a little shocked, and flustered. He pulled his hoodie down to try and cover up the bulge in his pants, as he headed towards his driver room.
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It was time for a car check. And you were picking up the steering wheel to put it in the car. When you turned back around to go over to the car, you saw him.
Lando was standing in his seat, and you watched him lower himself into the seat, holding onto the halo with a tight grip.
You almost dropped the steering wheel in your hand, as your eyes focused on his hands. You had to literally shake your head to get back to the right headspace.
You walked over to the car, and looked down at Lando looking around the cockpit, trying to get in a comfortable position. After he found it, he looked up and his eyes met yours.
His eyes were shining from the lighting on the ceiling. And the feeling that arose was butterflies hidden by anger. Why the fuck was he so breathtaking, but also such a dick. Fuck him. 
You clenched your jaw as you kept eye contact with him. 
“You gonna hand me the steering wheel love?” There was that stupid smirk again.
You narrowed your eyes at him in anger, and handed him the wheel. He clicked it in place, and looked back up at you and told you something he wanted changed on the car. 
Luckily for you, when he started talking about the car, you went straight into work mode. Not a single thought about Lando in your brain. (Only far in the back)
He pointed to show you something that was underneath the steering wheel, right over where his legs rested. And you couldn’t see it. So you stepped farther towards the back of the car, to see it more from his angle. You grabbed a stepping stool that was standing close by, and leaned over the halo. You face resting just beside his. 
“What was it again?” You asked him, surprisingly calm, but the working Y/N was in control right now.
He pointed again, and started explaining it. And you stretched a hand out to point to it as well, making sure you understood each other. 
Lando didn’t expect you to get that close. And when you stretched your hand out and got even closer, he turned to look at you.
You felt his hot breath on the side of your face, and you could tell in your peripheral that he was looking at you. So you turned to look at him. Your faces so close that your noses almost touched. 
But somehow, you kept your cool. “I can fix that for you Lando, you just need to get out of the car.” You smiled innocently at him as you leaned back and stepped away. 
When he stepped out, you got your tools ready and lowered yourself into the seat, needing to sit there to get the best access.
As you worked away, Lando stood by the side of the car, arms folded against his chest. There was something going on in his body that he couldn’t recognise. He was still feeling the effects of what happened with the two of you earlier. But there was something different there as well.
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On Sunday, you found yourself standing in front of the mirror in the public bathroom. It was not long before race start. And you were staring at yourself in the mirror.
You were angry, frustrated and way too fucking horny. Last night, you caved, again. Imagining your fingers were his. You used it as a way of getting the anger out, and it worked. 
But your brain was on overdrive and everything was threatening to boil over. Looking at yourself, you took a deep breath and nodded to yourself, heading back out, ready for work, trying to ignore everything and hoping it would be fine. 
You were sitting on the pit wall, as you watched them line back up on the grid after the formation lap. And Lando lined his car up on P1. Max lined up in P4, unlucky in Q3.
The race start was good, the top 5 drivers staying as is. Lando keeping the lead until halfway in the race, Lando boxed to get new tires. And when he moved his way back up the grid again, you heard his voice coming on the radio.
“Something is wrong.”
“The gears are not working properly”
You turned to Lando’s race engineer sitting to your right. You nodded at him, and he nodded back, a silent exchange you both understood. 
He contacted Lando to tell him he was looking into it, and would update him as fast as possible. 
You looked at as much of the data as you could, as fast as you could. And there you found it. Between all the numbers and graphs, there was one thing off. 
You contacted the race engineer on the radio, and pointed to the mark on the screen. He saw it, and you both knew the solution. Luckily an easy one, as he only needed to press a few buttons on the steering wheel to change modes. 
The race engineer nodded at you again, but this time, in a way that signaled you to tell Lando. So you did.
“Lando, mode 6, and give it 3.8”
“Understood”
“Thanks Y/N”
You felt like you could hear a smile on his face, but probably not. Right?
When you looked back at the data, you saw everything was fine. And not long after, Lando radioed back to say it was good, and he was ready to get back to the chase.
And he did just that, climbing his way back up. Lucky for him, Max had pitted not long after Lando, making Lando ahead of Max in the race. 
You were anxious for the last few laps. He had gotten back into P1, and had made a reasonable gap back to the driver behind him. 
The screams you heard on the radio as he crossed the line first, almost made you deaf for a minute. And you had a big smile on your face as you celebrated with the crew on the pit wall, proud of the car you helped in making. 
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You had gotten the car back to the garage after watching the podium. You, and two other mechanics were pulling the protective sheet over the car. You tried to keep your mind focused on the task at hand, but the image of Lando getting champagne poured on him was seared into your brain. But when you were done with everything, thanking the mechanics before you stepped back. You heard someone entering the garage. 
In walked Lando, soaked in champagne and still dressed in his racing suit that was hanging around his hips. When he saw you, he actually smiled. And seeing him like that, you couldn’t help the heat settling in your core.
He almost ran over to you and wrapped his arms around your hips. He lifted you with him in a tight hug, your feet far above the ground, you had to grab onto his shoulders for support. 
“There’s my no.1 mechanic!” 
His voice was muffled as his face was resting directly against your boobs. 
And when you squeezed his shoulders in reaction, he looked up at you as he still held you tight. You couldn’t get any words out. But as he looked up at you, he smiled. A genuine, lovely smile. But something else was shining in his eyes, and his pupils dilated. 
He felt you started to slip out of his arms, so he readjusted his grip. He got a firm hold on your ass, and when you felt it, everything boiled over.
“Let. Me. The Fuck. Down.” “Now.”
The mechanics stood there in confusion until they heard that. They shared a look, and hurried to leave the garage. Avoiding you screaming at Lando.
Lando heard the threatening tone in your voice, and he immediately lowered you to the ground. 
When he stood back to look at you, he opened his mouth to say something. But you were quicker.
“ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME NORRIS? YOU CAN’T JUST LIFT ME UP LIKE THAT! AND NOT TO MENTION WHAT HAPPENED THURSDAY MORNING! YOU’RE MAKING ME GO CRAZY!” You basically screamed at him, with your finger pointing at him in anger. But you weren’t finished. 
“You’re the one who wanted me to have this job, and you’re usually rude and mean, but then you’re teasing me and acting all flirty?!” “You’re so fucking confusing!” 
Your brain had exploded at his point. Every feeling that had been pent up for so long, finally boiled over. And since everything hit you, you felt yourself grow wetter and wetter by the second. You let out a heavy breath and lifted your hands to hold onto your head in frustration. 
Lando had just taken it all, with his eyebrows lifted in shock. He was making you go crazy? His mind was running, what did you mean? He didn’t know what to do, what to say. But then he saw the small movement you made, and the look on your face. A smirk making its way to his face as his eyes got even darker. 
While in your frustration, your body just acted for you. And as you were standing there, looking anywhere but at him, your face red and hot, your whole body on fire. Your thighs squeezed together for some desperate neediness for something, anything. 
And when that caught Landos eyes, he took two long steps towards you. His arms wrapping around you, the palms of his hands resting on the top of your ass. 
When he was suddenly in front of you, so close. You dropped your hands in shock, and just stared into his eyes, then his lips. They were slightly parted, and you saw the quick moment his tongue darted out to lick his lips. Before you quickly looked back into his eyes, cursing yourself for the moment of weakness. 
When you locked eyes again, his eyes were dark, looking down at you. Lando had no patience left. He shoved your body hard, into himself. You chests touching, and the grip he had on your ass, where he was holding you tight against him, you felt almost every detail of his already growing bulge through his pants. If you weren’t soaked already, you sure were now. 
You had no control when you let out a small moan at the contact, and that was all Lando wanted, and needed to hear, as he leaned down to capture your lips in an aggressive kiss.
It was like he was hungry, starving for you. And Lando had wanted you since he first saw you, and with the months that had passed, it all came crashing down at the same time.
The kiss was messy, teeth clashing and rough. But you loved it, feeling another moan slip out of your throat.
As you moaned, Lando took the chance and slipped his tongue inside your mouth, your own immediately tangling with his. It was harsh, but so full of passion. His hands were guiding your hips in a way that gave him some much needed friction. And when your hands slid up to grab onto the hair at the back of his neck, he let out a low groan. 
You couldn’t take it anymore, and you pulled on his hair, so you disconnected. Your breathing was heavy as you looked up at him. He was breathing heavy too, and his lips were wet, and slightly red. His pupils blown wide. God, he looked so fucking good, you almost wanted to go back to being angry at him. just because of how hot he was. But you didn’t, he spoke before you could do anything.
“Shit, I need you.” His eyes darted all across your face, looking for any type of reaction. “Please”
He looked so desperate, and he sounded even more desperate. He was begging you. 
Fuck it, you needed this too. “Your driver room” “Now”
He was quick to grab your hand and pull you after him.
When you finally entered his driver room behind him, he turned around and closed the door behind you. And when he turned back around, he took long steps towards you, until your lips met again. 
Neither of you could control the sounds coming from the both of you. His hands were everywhere, grabbing onto what he could. You hands found his hair again, grabbing it, earning a sweet sound from him. 
He walked the both of you backwards until the backs of your legs hit the small couch. He spun the both of you around, he sat down and pulled you to sit on top of him. 
When you sat down, Lando looked down to where your hips met as his grip on your ass moved your hips, grinding yourself onto him. You lifted both of your hands to hold onto the sides of his face, and made him look at you.
When Lando looked at you, you almost took his breath away. Your cheeks were tinted pink, and your lips were open, breathing heavily. Some of your hair had fallen in your face and your eyes were shining as you looked at him, he swore, you were a goddess. His hands slid up to hold on to your waist, and he pulled his bottom lip between his teeth in a way to try and control himself. But he lost it the second you whispered.
“Just fuck me already”
His hands immediately found the hem of your Red Bull shirt and pulled it over your head. You understood the signal and stood up from his lap and went to pull your pants off, as he pulled the fireproof shirt over his head. 
You were standing in front of him in only your underwear as you looked at him hurrying to pull his race suit and the fireproofs of his legs. When he finally did, he looked up at you, and you swore you could see his dick twitch in his gray boxers. 
Your confidence grew in you, so you went to take your bra off. When it hit the floor, you could hear him muttering under his heavy breath “Fuck”. Next, you hooked your thumbs in the waistband of your panties and slowly pulled them down. 
It had been awhile since the last time someone saw you naked, but with the reaction Lando was giving you, his eyes looking at you like you were a goddess. It made you feel beautiful, and so powerful. So you stepped forward until you were right in front of him. His eyes kept shifting from your face to your tits. 
You sat down in his lap again, your knees resting beside his hips, and your core just barely touching the outline of his dick in his boxers. When you leaned down to capture his lips again, you lowered your hips until you felt his covered dick resting between your folds. And because of the much needed friction you got. You moaned into his mouth. 
The kiss was much slower and careful than before, frustration replaced by the need to really taste each other. His hands had found a tight hold on your hips, as he tried to guide them to move. 
“Baby, you’re soaked” He said as he looked down at where you were resting above him.
Lifting your hips, you saw that his boxers were absolutely soaked because of you. And you felt your face heat up even more. 
“Fuck, I can’t wait anymore” “You reckon you’re ready to take me?”
He looked up at you, and you felt stunned. Just nodding wildly at him, his smirk grew. He looked down again, and pulled his boxers down enough to free his dick. Springing free, it hit his abdomen. You stared down, bewildered. How was he supposed to fit?
His hands found your hips again, and he guided them to rest right above him. One of his hands wrapped around his dick, and he moved his hands up and down a few times, as he looked up at you. You were staring down at his hand wrapped around himself, and you felt your pussy clench, waiting to finally have him inside of you. 
He moved his dick so the tip was resting against your hole. Looking up at him, he still had that smirk on his face. 
“Think you can handle it?” 
You didn’t reply before you dropped your hips down until he bottomed out inside of you. His pelvis hitting your clit. You both moaned simultaneously. The stretch was a lot, he was big, and you hadn’t had a dick in you for ages. But God it felt so good. 
Lando swore no one had been able to fit around him so perfectly, and when you took all of him, he felt you clench around him, almost holding him in. He felt another moan slip out of him. His mouth was hanging open in awe as he looked at you. Your head was tipped back, eyes squeezed shut in pleasure.
“Shit, you don’t know how long I’ve wanted you” He almost whispered.
He slid a hand up to hold on to the side of your face, tipping it down to make you look at him. And his other hand gave your hip a squeeze. 
“Please move”
You didn’t have to make him beg for you, he just did on his own. Was he really this weak for you?
A smirk grew on your face as you wanted to know just how weak he was. You just grinded your hips slowly, and you watched his face as his eyebrows furrowed in pleasure. You kept your small movements up, but he tried to lift your hips up and down on him. But you were stubborn, and you didn’t budge. 
Your hands grabbed onto his shoulders, as the movement was so good for you. Your clit getting friction everytime you moved back and forth. Your breath coming out in whimpers. 
You closed your eyes again, but opened them when you felt his hand on your face again. The look on his face was pleading. 
“Please baby.” “I need more” His voice was so soft and sweet, and you couldn’t help the smile on your lips. 
“Say it again.”
“Please please please please baby”
His hands were running up and down your torso as his eyes were locked on yours.
You gave in and moved your hips up to slam them back down. And the groan that made its way out of lando could’ve made you cum already.
You couldn’t hold back anymore, as you kept up the rhythm, riding him with your hands gripping his shoulders. His hands slid around to your ass and grabbed a hold as he helped you move up and down on his dick, and his hips moved up to meet yours. 
You knew the door to the driver room was pretty thin, so you bit your bottom lip to try and hold back some of the sounds threatening to escape. Lando noticed, and snaked a hand around to circle his thumb around your clit. He saw it on your face, the effect it had on you. But he also felt it, as you got even tighter around him. You didn’t moan from it, but he sure did. 
You were so focused as you tried to keep quiet, but with the added pleasure it was so difficult, also because of the sounds he was making.
“Come on baby, let me hear you” He said in a low tone, as he was looking up at you.
That broke you. And he got the sounds from you that he desperately needed to hear. 
As you looked down at him, you saw his eyebrows scrunched together as he was staring at himself disappearing inside you, and his mouth was hanging open. You lifted one of your hands and ran it through the wet curls on the top of his head, still soaked in champagne and sweat. 
You grabbed a hold of them and pulled his head back to make him look at you. All of the feelings you had for him came rising to the surface, just as you felt your climax closing in. The feelings of anger and frustration. So with gritted teeth, you spoke.
“Fuck you.”
He enjoyed that.
“You already are sweetheart.”
You gave in and sped up your rhythm. And his thumb moved faster and his grip on your ass tightened. Your hand slid down to cradle his jaw. You ran your thumb across the facial hair growing on his chin, before you pulled him in for a searing kiss before your climax hit like a brick wall. 
You disconnected from the kiss and tipped your head back, eyes screwed shut, as your vision was going white, and you whispered a quiet “Fuck, Lando” as you came. 
Lando felt you tighten around him as you came, and he looked up at you, mesmerized, as he saw your face contourting as you came around him. And he followed right after, coming inside you. 
You felt him filling you up, and his thumb had slowed down, but was still rubbing soft circles helping you come down from your orgasm. After a few seconds of catching your breath, as he did the same, you opened your eyes to look at him again, and he was already looking at you. The ghost of a gorgeous smile on his face. 
His hands rested on your thighs, and his thumb rubbing soft circles again. Neither of you said anything, you just looked at each other.
“You’re going to be the death of me” 
He was whipped.
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Notes: I realized this could be made into a series or something. So let me know if you want more!! Thank you for reading<3
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heartfullofleeches · 3 months
Note
dilf bull/hound darling: i’ve been used as a breeder before but i’d love to find someone special to connect with and start a future together you know?
kaimana [heard breeder and got so hard he got nauseous]: i think i hauve Covid
Former Breeder Darling takes a trip out to the beach nearby where the farm they used to work/live on. They strike up a conversation with an attendee at one of the bar stands. The guys a little awkward, but sweet - they guess he didn't have much interaction with others before he got the job and was still getting the hang of things. He noticeably becomes a whole lot clumsier when Darling mentions the details of their past career and current goal.
"So - what brings you out here, Stranger?"
"There's a farm a bit up north from here.. Worked there almost my entire adult life. Job was starting to get to my head so I quit."
"Oh, is that so? I try not to head too far from home, but now I'm starting to regret that. What type of work did you do?"
"I was a breeder.....on top of some manual labor.'
The glass Kaimana held slips from his hands.
"Holy..... You good, Kai?"
K....Kai?? You're giving him nicknames already?? Kaimana grabs the broom propped against the wall behind him - using it to support his wobbly legs instead of cleaning the shards of broken glass at his feet. "Y-yes, I'm fine!... Please continue."
"Eh, not much more to say. Whenever someone needed some assistance having a kid I helped out. Didn't think much of it when I was younger. Paid good, and I got to live on the farm for next to nothing which allowed me to save up over the years.... I had no attachment to it till I received some photos of one of my kids... Well... Not my kid, but their folks were nice enough to send them... It got me thinking... about a family of my own."
You look up from your glass to find Kaimana frantically scribbling something on a napkin.
"My number! .... I-if you'd like to keep in touch. Have you found a place of receidence yet? I know a lovely hotel closeby. I can take you there!- W-we could get to know each other a little better - maybe or dinner or-or a nice bottle of wine."
You chuckle. "Dinner sounds good. Been meaning to try some of the seafood this area is know for.. You should probably clean up that glass though."
You're probably right about that. If he faints atop a pile of glass he'll have to miss your date getting stitches! It's a somewhat difficult for him to move with one particular area of his clothing so drenched in his own fluids.
"Y...yes... dear.... Dear customer, I mean!... haha..."
"Cute." You down the rest of your drink and pull a few bills from your pocket, tucking the napkin in that same sleeve as you stand from the counter. "See you later, Kai."
Kai waves as you depart. He wouldn't call it a goodbye as he'd see you soon enough.
"See you.... Honey."
617 notes · View notes
onewingeddove444 · 10 months
Text
★How the bachelors would react if they accidentally made you cry
word count: 1.1k
Alex:
-would probably not even notice you're crying at first
-his expression would change so quickly
-😀😦
-kind of knew he had it coming though, since a lot of the stuff that flies out of his mouth is....well😇
-would IMMEDIATELY start taking the blame, saying things like "nahhh i didn't actually mean that i lied haha no idea why i said that i'm so stupid" ((starts blaming it on his hormones being affected by working out or something😭😭))
-hesitates at first, but pulls you into the tightest embrace you've ever felt ngl probably hurts a little lol
-his way of apologising to you is saying "you can punch me as hard as you want, i deserve it!!!!"
-starts treating you like royalty for another month, to the point where it becomes annoying
-every time you bring it up, even as a joke, he basically drops to his knees and starts apologising all over again
Elliott:
-if you thought this man was already dramatic as it is....lord🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️
-would try to be cool about it, while in his head he's already pressing a dagger to his neck, saying that he has now betrayed his heart and doesn't want to go on any longer
-the moment he sees tears flowing down your face, the only word able to come out of his mouth is a soft "no, no, no..."
-he'd probably start crying with you😭😭😭
-starts whispering the most loving and kind things about yourself into your ear
-literally compares you to the most breathtaking images you could ever envision
-alternative scenario, where he just drops to the floor and starts begging for your forgiveness, even though what he said wasn't really that bad
-after that, he checks up on you every 5 minutes, to make sure you're not upset with him
-would swear on his life and soul to never hurt you again ((mind you it was never that serious😭))
-writes you so many short poems...atp they just become a whole book
Harvey:
-man....😭
-probably hurts him more than it does you lmao
-you crying would be too much for him already...but crying because of him?? ouuu
-is ready to completely retract what he said, even if he's absolutely right, that just doesn't matter to him anymore
-he just stands there for a good amount of time, since he really doesn't know how to deal with these kinds of emotions
-this might just be the first time this man has made someone cry because...let's be fr☠️
-would do that thing where he cups your cheeks and wipes your tears with his thumbs ((after that he's kinda clueless though😭))
-this literally being his worst nightmare...in his eyes hurting you is the equivalent of failing as a partner...and he's not really allowed to fail too often🙁
-would wait 30 years until you're not upset with him ((it takes you exactly 1 minute btw)), and after that it's flowers delivered to your doorstep every day of the week
-even if it were to be a one-time occurrence, he would NEVER EVER forget it, and he would always justify spoiling you with it ((using the 4 cents he makes from the clinic👎))
Sam:
-he is not that smart when it comes to verbalising thoughts please forgive him
-says things like "aw man you're crying😔😔😔😭😭“
-if he's holding a drink or eating something, he offers it to you, even if there's a single bite/sip left of it
-refuses to smile until he's 100% sure you've forgiven him, otherwise he just looks like this: :--(
-low-key fighting for his life not to pull out his phone and google "how to comfort crying person wikihow"
-once you tell him that it's okay between you two bro gets jolly, running around in circles, giggling, twirling his hair and laying down kicking his feet up
-the thing he did that upset you could've been minor, but that still doesn't stop him from saying "man...😔🤦 i'm so glad this chapter is behind us now.." like okay???😭😭😭 ((bonus points if he describes this as a "rough patch" in your relationship))
-tries making something for you after, fails miserably, resorts to showing you cool skateboard tricks he learned off of youtube
-learns his lesson and actually thinks more before he says something ((to the best of his ability))
-promises to write a song about your love and go platinum ((shows it to sebastian and gets banned from writing lyrics for the band forever))
Sebastian:
-freezes immediately
-literally unable to get a single word out, what is he supposed to do in his situation😭
-manages to whisper "i didn't mean..." and proceeds to go quiet after that
-he's been living a sheltered life for a very long time, so he's really scared that whatever he says it will only hurt you even more
-you can definitely see his expression change...not only does it soften but he looks UPSET upset, mostly with himself
-pulls you into a hug, hoping that it'll help a little bit ((it does, bro seems like a good hugger))
-asks you if there's anything he can do to cheer you up, and let me tell you he'd really do anything
-does not let you go for the rest of the day, having his arm wrapped around you, holding your hand, even if it's just the pinky fingers touching
-you have to keep reassuring him that it's okay now, he literally hits you with the "are you sure you're not mad at me?" every 3 seconds just to make sure you guys are good🙏
-lets you touch whatever you want in his room, i'm talking elementary school pictures, old sketchbooks, it's all yours, no matter how humiliating
Shane:
-um...uh😭🙅‍♀️
-yeah he is PISSED he's made you cry, he might've been mean when he first saw you, but now??? that is just not allowed in his mind idc
-jumps to self-deprecation immediately, talking about how he's an asshole, how he always fucks things up (🙁)
-just takes the whole blame on himself, no problem with that
-kind of saw this happening in the nearest future, that man does not have a very good opinion of himself let's be honest😭
-you could tell him you forgive him and he'd be like "nah don't do that wtf i don't deserve it😔"
-doesn't try comforting you at first, since he just assumes that you might never want to see him again
-but after the dust settles he reassures you that he's going to do everything to make sure this doesn't happen again
-sends you musty frozen pizza in the mail in retaliation (sigh🙁)
-would love to pretend this never happened, but making you cry really took a hit on his self-esteem, however it also made him think about how to be the best partner you can have
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neptuneiris · 7 months
Text
sparks (04/04)
But I promise you this I'll always look out for you
pairing: business-boyfriend!aemond x fem!reader
summary: at the beginning your relationship with aemond is perfect and there were no worries. until he becomes the Heir of his father's company, the most important in the whole country and certain events and certain people start to interfere in the relationship.
word count: 9.0k
previous part • next part • series masterlist
now yes, the epilogue is officially coming soon haha
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hello loves! hope you are having a wonderful day!
I made an announcement about the change in the story so if for some reason you didn't read it, don't worry, here I will explain again what happened:)
the reason why I decided to add a part 4 to the fic is very simple: the chapter was too long for the epilogue and when I say too long I mean really long. and I didn't want to bore you or fill you with too much, believe me that the epilogue was exaggeratedly long:(
I'm sorry if it wasn't what you expected, but I decided the best and I really hope you like it a lot, after all it's not the end yet😚
that's all, I won't keep you any longer, enjoy!
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Aemond Targaryen had never felt so miserable in his life.
The trip to Casterly Rock was one of the most important in his entire working career and yet it was the worst trip he had ever attended in his life.
His mind would not leave him alone and the urge to cry along with the anxiety and desperation he felt was too much. And it was so much that he couldn't control it.
But outside of that, he didn't care too much about the event, socializing and having conversations with other important businessmen, as if it wasn't something he did every day, nor did he attend to the press which was what he avoided the most nor did he care about Larys Strong and Alys Rivers.
He honestly didn't care about anything.
At least nothing outside of the important thing that was his meeting with his partner Jason Lannister and attending his conference with the board of directors.
He didn't care that this would later lead to 'serious consequences,' if you could call it that, with his grandsire.
Even after he caught up again with Jason Lannister and properly attended the conference with the board of directors, as soon as it was all over, he took his flight back to King's Landing in a needy and desperate manner.
And the first thing he did after landing was to look for you and try to talk to you. Although he must have known that you would not let him find you.
Your university is extremely large and although he tried to find you by asking the administration and coordination of your university for your varied schedule, they did not give him anything, as they cannot give out their students' personal and private information so openly to strangers.
They only do so on occasions that require it and are extremely necessary with hard evidence, such as to a family member of the student for an emergency or something like that.
And Aemond honestly didn't blame them, as he looked extremely desperate and like a madman, especially when they told him they couldn't give him that information.
So he went to your work, where he knew it would be easier to find you, but again… he was unsuccessful because you wouldn't let him.
"Uhm… I'm sorry, but she's not here."
Your coworker told him and judging by her face, he knew instantly that she was lying, especially by the pitiful face she was giving him amidst the assurance she wants to create by saying her words.
"Please, just tell her I need to talk to her," he tells her pleadingly, feeling like he will burst into tears at any second.
She lets out a long breath, as she looks away from his gaze for a moment, looking hesitant, nervous and even watching him with pity.
"I'm really sorry but… she hasn't presented for days now and I haven't really seen her."
"But I need to talk to her as soon as possible," he insists, sad and still with a hint of hope that he can fix this, "Do you know where I could find her after her classes and work?"
"I-I…" she starts to say nervously, biting her lips, then completely avoiding eye contact with him "I'm sorry but I don't know. Like I said, I haven't seen her, so I'm not aware of her plans after work."
He takes a deep breath, as he runs a hand through his hair and also over his face, feeling his heart beating too fast, losing patience, losing hope, feeling completely desperate and frustrated.
"Please," he begs, not knowing what else to do, "Please tell me. I really need to see her and talk to her. I'm worried."
Sophia, not knowing what else to say, can't help but feel uncomfortable and again averts her gaze from his.
"I'm sorry but I haven't seen her and I really don't know where she might be."
Aemond watches her for a few seconds without saying anything else even with his sad and desperate face, understanding perfectly that he wouldn't get anything from her about you.
He sees how she is more than willing to keep lying for you and even though he feels completely desperate and frustrated, he knows it's not her fault, so he decides not to push her too hard.
So he took a deep breath and tried to sound calmer.
"Okay, I understand, thank you," he says resignedly, "But if you see her, please tell her that I came looking for her and needed to talk to her," he tells her one last time, "Tell her to please consider it."
And Sophie nods with a sympathetic nod, still watching him with that pity.
"Sure, I will."
And he nods back.
"Thank you."
That time Aemond came out of the coffee shop completely disappointed, having the foolish hope that you would come out of hiding and stop him after the little show he gave to your coworker completely sad and desperate.
But of course, that didn't happen.
Upon returning to the apartment, nothing felt the same anymore. Aemond now all he feels now is a deep loneliness and sadness that eats him alive inside as he finds himself alone in that place, a place that was once home to him and you, where you both started a little life together as a couple.
With loneliness in his chest and in the middle of the apartment, he sees everything around him with his melancholic eye and face.
Everything now felt like a painful reminder of what he had lost.
The place is completely permeated with memories where every room and corner tells a story of his relationship with you.
The cushions on the couch where you used to cuddle and watch movies together, the kitchen island where you shared with each other your day to day separately and the kitchen where you made food or washed dishes together, laughing and talking about anything.
Aemond then goes to the bedroom, where he now sees your empty desk where there is no longer your laptop, your lamp and all those pens and markers with which you used to make notes for your classes, nor the various sheets and folders with which you used to do your projects and research.
So he understands why you decided to leave him, because even though it was never intentional and the least he wanted to do was hurt you, he still did.
Your vanity is also completely empty, where so many times you spent hours doing your makeup happy and energetic singing your favorite songs.
And other nights you would remove your makeup crying for him and because he never put a serious stop to his work by standing you up.
And as he looks at the bed, only the memories invade him more, beginning to feel his eye watering.
The two of you cuddling, him taking refuge in your arms after a stressful day at his job or you taking refuge in his arms after a stressful day at college. Also before bedtime, the two of you would talk about anything silly until you fell asleep, where the moment felt more intimate than anywhere else.
And Aemond loved those moments, as did you, where you both shared space on the comfort of your bed.
Aemond then wanting to return to the living room, he stops in the middle of the hallway looking at the door with a serious and at the same time pained expression, where he also remembers that day when you were here and he was at the entrance waiting for Cole, where everything happened.
But it's also where you both made love and showed that love to each other with that passion, with that affection and with that deep intimacy of just the two of you that was nothing ordinary or common.
You were just two people in love loving and enjoying each other with that complicity and that unique union that characterized them.
Letting out a huge breath, he then plops down on the couch, staring at a spot in the living room in silence, feeling completely alone and hopeless.
And he hates it.
He absolutely hates the feeling.
Just as he hates the feeling of emptiness in his heart that seems impossible to fill. Because he knows it can never be filled by anyone else. Only you.
And that's when Aemond starts to really break down, realization and acceptance slowly creeping into his mind, eating him alive, destroying him, leaving him with nothing.
Until it happens and in the midst of his silence and loneliness, he starts to cry without being able to help it anymore.
He hates everything, his job, his grandsire, the association with Alys Rivers, the press, absolutely everything and also himself, for letting you slip through his fingers and not doing anything more efficient from the beginning to avoid the breakup.
Because if he had, you would still be with him.
It's only until Aemond really feels miserable and like he can't breathe that he decides to call the only person who can get to him sooner, really not wanting to be alone, needing someone to be able to reassure him.
So he calls the one person he thinks might be able to help him and reassure him.
He would have called you, of that there is no doubt, you would be his first choice, but you have blocked him from everywhere, from every social media, calls and messages.
He would have called Hel too, but she's in Highgarden, Hells, he would have even called Aegon, but he's in Storm Ends.
"Yes, Aemond?"
Rhaenyra Targaryen answers on the other end of the call, and Aemond really can't formulate coherent sentences for every sob.
He tells her your name, that he can't find you, that you've blocked him from everywhere, he mentions his grandsire, the company, loneliness, sadness and that it all happened too fast, that he needs her and doesn't know what to do.
And soon after that Aemond says he doesn't want to be there anymore, so they both leave the apartment and with every step he takes away from the place that used to be a home for him, he feels an increasingly heavier weight than before in his heart.
Soon Rhaenyra arrives at the apartment to help her half brother, not asking him anything about what has him like this while he continues to cry and holds her hand tightly.
Rather Rhaenyra tries to reassure him by telling him that she is there for him.
It is only a matter of time before his entire family knows of his breakup with you, instantly Hel calling him, as does Aegon, Hel being the more surprised and incredulous of the two, wanting to know what has happened.
Since Aemond has no vacation and can't afford to miss work with a few extremely important and one hundred percent justifiable exceptions, he soon finds himself setting foot inside the building.
Though they both know, as does their whole family, that it was because of their grandsire and everything to do with the company, also because of Alys Rivers.
And they are not surprised when Aemond implies he had something to do with it, not saying anything else, clearly because he doesn't want to talk about it.
All his workers notice the down and serious mood of the next boss, as it is also noticeable that he doesn't want to talk to anyone and doesn't want anyone to talk to him more than necessary, so he just locks himself in his office to continue with his work.
But as soon as he starts his work day, inevitably having that hope by looking at his phone screen from time to time that you will call or text him, Eleanor calls him and warns him that he has a meeting in ten minutes with his grandsire.
This makes his mood worse, even though he knew it would only be a matter of time, but he reluctantly gets up and heads for the conference room.
And the moment Otto enters the room, clearly with his annoyed and frustrated face, the whole place fills with tension. And when Otto makes it clear to him that he is not happy at all, still Aemond maintains an emotionless and indifferent face.
"I can't believe how irresponsible you're being, truly."
Otto begins to say with incredulous surprise and a frown on his face, watching him completely annoyed.
"I asked you for one, just one thing on your trip to Casterly Rock."
"The only important thing on that trip was to attend my meeting with Jason Lannister and also the conference with the board of directors, in both of which I did perfectly well," Aemond says still completely indifferent.
"Don't you want to play dumb with me, Aemond," he warns him through his teeth, "You know perfectly well what I'm talking about."
"Look, I'm not in the mood for this right now—
"And you think I am?" he inquires instantly, "You think I'm not tired of telling you the same old thing over and over again?" he says annoyed, "Wasn't I clear with you when I told you I didn't want Rivers to cause a scene for me again because of you and what's the first thing she does when she comes back from that trip?"
"For fuck's sake, you close your fucking contract with her!"
Explodes Aemond annoyed against him without being able to control himself anymore, tired and annoyed of him, but of course Otto also responds in the same way.
"No, this is your job! She wants you, not me! And now that you're finally done with Y/N, you can do something about it, something more than necessary, but you do nothing!"
Then again something inside Aemond snaps at the mention of your name and the breakup, leaving him completely silent and watching his grandsire with his parted lips.
Everything in his mind is still fresh, his emotions are still running high and that he has mentioned the breakup as a good thing so that he can finally whore himself out to Alys without any guilt and restraint, as his grandsire has asked him to do, only makes his gaze turn dark and one of complete anger towards him.
And Otto, as he is looking him straight in the eye, notices that change within him and in his gaze, but he doesn't move, doesn't flinch, and continues firm.
"So you know."
Aemond says in a low but firm tone, watching him intently and without even blinking, even with that dark and determined look, making Otto watch him silently for a moment, then swallowing hard and finally speaking.
"Of course I know. Just because I'm not home much, doesn't mean I'm not informed of what's going on with my family."
"And you're happy now?"
He inquires him really without much emotion, with an incredibly calm and soft tone of voice that surprises Otto, while now Aemond's gaze reflects the slight pain, watching him completely attentively, being strong and as much as he can in front of him, clenching his jaw.
And Otto says nothing, just watches him, which Aemond considers him a coward, as what he wanted so badly has finally happened and he says nothing.
"I bet you do," he answers her question for him, watching him bitterly.
Otto lets out a long breath.
"Look, I know you cared about her, and I feel sorry for you, but the company—
"No, that's not true, you don't feel the slightest bit sorry for me," he interrupts him with a disinterested tone, "She broke up with me because of you, but also because of me. And I'm sure when you found out, you were so pleased and had more hope that I would finally do something about Rivers and the association," he says dispassionately.
"Aemond, I'm just asking you to be professional and fulfill your obligations as heir to this company. I'm asking you because I care about you and because you can't get stuck thinking about a girl, instead of your job, your company."
"Don't mention her," he tells her instantly serious and with a threatening tone and look, "I don't want you to talk about her, ever again."
Otto lets out a long breath.
"Rivers has given us a warning and a deadline for you to convince her to sign those papers. She's already upset and unpleasant enough thanks to you," he tells him seriously, "This whole process has gone on long enough, so either you act now or we lose her forever. And we're not going to have the conversation again about why it's important to partner with her company, are we?"
Aemond looks away from him, completely pissed off and annoyed, and then gets up from the swivel chair, intending to finally get the fuck out of here.
"I'm talking to you."
Otto tells him in a higher tone of voice, watching him seriously.
"Yes and I've heard enough."
"You will do as I have told you and you will do it now," he warns him.
Aemond scowls at him, then puts on an annoyed and more threatening face than before, placing his hands on the very expensive refined wooden table then leaning towards him as well with his threatening posture.
"You're not going to order me around anymore."
"Aemond, do you really want to force me to do something I don't really want to?"
"Don't worry, I know you really do want to and I honestly don't care. But believe me it wouldn't be good for you, after all… I remind you that you're forgetting your place."
The fight and silence builds the tension further, as Otto and Aemond stare menacingly and defiantly at each other, each with their differences being more than clear, when suddenly the door to the conferences bursts open.
This breaks all the tension and also draws the attention of both of them, who look towards the door and under the doorway stands Rhaenyra, whom Otto observes slightly surprised and completely confused.
"Sorry to interrupt," she says as she places a soft smile, "I hope it's not something important."
Aemond turns his gaze back to his grandsire for a moment with his jaw clenched, who continues to stare at Rhaenyra confused and this time with a questioning look, showing his annoyance at the sight of her.
"No, we were done," Aemond makes clear, his voice in a serious and low tone, to turn his gaze back to her.
"And what are you doing here?"
Otto inquires Rhaenyra, who is not surprised by his attitude towards her, as she is used to it and doesn't really care.
"I came to speak with Aemond," she says then turns her gaze to her half-brother, "Your secretary told me you were here and I thought maybe you could talk to me, if you're not busy."
He nods in her direction.
"Sure," and she nods back, waiting for him as well.
But Aemond turns his gaze to his grandsire, who also looks back at him, confused and questioning to see that in his gaze he still intends to fight him with his threatening posture.
Again they both stare at each other, where Otto stares at him completely serious without saying anything and Aemond continues threatening, completely serious.
"If you pay someone to notify all the press and all the media anonymously of my breakup with Y/N or tell only Rivers to take advantage of me, believe me I will publicly announce and tarnish your image about how you tried to whore me out to Rivers with proof."
He threatens and Otto gasps for a moment.
"And i will tell worse, that she was also seeking an intimate relationship with me, a woman who has almost my twenty years on me."
And without saying anything else, Aemond leaves the room together with Rhaenyra without waiting and without hearing any answer back from his grandsire, for the first time in a long time having won the fight and leaving him completely speechless.
"What? You thought I didn't know?" he asks, "She doesn't say her age and she doesn't look nearly forty, but she is, so we don't want any of that, do we?"
He observes him expectantly,
"It will be a disastrous scandal. And it won't be good for her, nor for you and the company. I also know it won't be good for me, my mother, my siblings or my entire family. But I will do it if you leave me no choice and I won't give a fuck, because it will all have been your fault," he makes it clear.
At that moment he feels liberated and empowered, as he has finally left him in his place and has not done what he always ordered her to do, while he experiences a sense of relief and renewed self-confidence.
But unfortunately, that feeling doesn't last forever. Or at least it doesn't last once he's outside the company walls.
And that's because he's still thinking and longing for you.
He tried a few more times to try to find you, asking all the people he and you have in common where you might be or where you live now saying he needed to talk to you, but no one would give him an answer, making him miserable.
Even at work, he couldn't concentrate, because all the time he was thinking about you and if he could do his work, it was all thanks to Eleonor, who would notice his tired face and the bags under his eyes, as well as notice how hard he was trying.
She would see him drinking coffee more than usual and it worried her, but knowing how stubborn he is, she knew there was nothing she could do.
And once he got home, no one knew the sadness and loneliness that consumed him completely.
Even sometimes when he couldn't sleep, he kept looking at the selfie of you and him on his phone screen that he hasn't taken down, both of you smiling and more than happy, instantly feeling the pain in his chest and the tears about to run down his cheek.
It's going on a month since you decided to end the relationship but Aemond is still haunted by the moments you both shared and the 'what ifs' that haunt his mind.
Every day, the pain of the breakup seems to increase rather than decrease. At every moment of distraction, also at work or doing the most ordinary thing in life, like making a coffee, Aemond gets lost in his thoughts, remembering you.
And in every memory, he blames himself for what had gone wrong, thinking of all the ways he could have acted differently and done more for both of you, for you.
And he couldn't accept that he would simply never see you again, that it was all over, he needs you and he needs you so badly every time he starts crying and blaming himself at the same time.
He feels completely trapped in the memory of what the relationship was and feels unable to get over you, the woman who had and still means everything to him.
It is not until Rhaenyra and her mother began to notice Aemond's instability and begin to worry about him that even Helaena decides to fly to King's Landing to be there for him, reporting everything to Aegon.
And fortunately Aemond doesn't push her away when she visits him by surprise, telling him that she has come to stay with him as long as necessary.
And he hugs her tightly and cries on her shoulder, asking her not to leave him alone, to please help him recover you, that he needs you, that he understands that everything was his fault but that he deserves at least one more conversation with you.
The people Aemond cares about are there for him, even Rhaenyra, but Helaena is the one who is almost all the time with him at home and also at the company, running the Highgarden company from there, helping him heal at the same time.
Unfortunately you never responded to Helaena's messages, neither to Baela's.
So even though it hurts Helaena to see her brother like this, she knows that you are hurt too, she knows your reasons why you did what you did and she doesn't blame you for it.
But Aemond can't.
And though he doesn't know it and doesn't even think about it, you are just as or worse off than he is, trying just as hard as he is to cope with the breakup, barely being functional in your day to day life and in having enough energy, being completely broken inside.
He is still immensely in love with you and every day that goes by and he doesn't see you or hear from you, it's complete torture.
He even stopped being seen in public and stopped attending events, focusing entirely on the company and nothing else.
It's not until another full month passes that one day, when Aemond wakes up to find Helaena in the kitchen with her face completely pale, her eyes wide open and her lips parted with her phone in hand, she gives him the news that he knew would happen someday but still takes him by surprise.
His father has died.
And he knows what that means, everyone knows.
He is the successor and literally overnight, he is now the boss, officially. And with that begins the real chaos for Aemond Targaryen.
It was a moment he was looking forward to but at the same time not because of the great responsibility that would fall on him, all the great weight.
But first of all, the whole Targaryen family is busy with a funeral and taking an indefinite rest, all of them and him especially hiding from the press and everyone.
1 month later
"So…
Speaks the calculated voice of Alys Rivers with a condescending tone, looking expectantly at Otto Hightower in front of her as she slowly turns in the swivel chair she is sitting in, having her uncle Larys Strong next to her, who in comparison to her is calmer.
"He won't show up?"
She inquires as she fiddles with the pen in her hand, twirling it between her fingers with her perfectly painted dark scarlet fingernails, raising an eyebrow in Otto's direction.
"Of course he will, he knows how important this is to us," he tells her immediately, "It's just that with the death of his father, he and his siblings still need a little more time. It's been very recent still."
"We still mourn the death of Viserys Targaryen," Larys Strong says in a soft tone and Otto nods in his direction.
But Alys is not at all pleased, for months now.
"We've been waiting for almost fifteen minutes."
"Yes, I know, I'm sorry, honestly—
The door suddenly opens, interrupting Otto and drawing the attention of the three in the conference room who turn their heads and see Aemond entering the room unhurriedly and calmly.
"Sorry for the delay," he says as he approaches his place, "I was taking an important call."
Rivers instantly looks at him in a penetrating manner as she continues to fiddle with the pen in her fingers, while his grandsire watches him seriously.
"More important than this?" hisses Otto quietly through his teeth.
And still not caring, he takes a seat to adopt an equally nonchalant posture, looking even annoyed that he has to be in this room with these people, causing Rivers stress and frustration, as well as his grandsire for his attitude and lack of interest.
"Yes."
Aemond replies to him without dissimulation and without caring.
"I don't think you have understood the gravity of the matter, Mrs. Targaryen," Alys Rivers speaks, catching the attention of the three, looking directly at him, "I gave you a deadline to sign the association papers and you still haven't given me one good reason why my company should be associated with yours."
Aemond shrugs, observing her indifferently.
"That my company is the most important, innovative and efficient in the entire country is not reason enough for you?"
"That's not what I meant."
"We're talking about business and what's in the best interest of our companies, aren't we?"
Rivers clenches her jaw.
"I think you know perfectly well that a partnership requires more than that, it's also about building interpersonal relationships."
"As far as I know, you are a co-owner of Riverlands Group and the one who actually founded the company was you, Larys Strong," he observes the man, "You shouldn't decide if you want to sign these papers or not?"
Otto throws daggers at him with his eyes and an utterly deadly stare, but Aemond doesn't even notice, as well as Rivers starts to get annoyed. So before Larys Strong can speak, she speaks first.
"We both work as a team and make decisions together," she tells him instantly, wanting to make it clear.
"You seem to make all the decisions."
"Aemond—
"As far as I know, it's not in your best interest to lose this opportunity to be able to partner with my company," Rivers speaks with a firmer, more serious and determined tone, "And I've been very patient and accessible for months now."
"Also as far as I know, months ago we attended an event together and it was you who announced how proud you were to have a partnership between us in process to everyone, yet you are the one who hasn't signed the papers, so what exactly is it that you need or want from me or the company for you to sign them?"
He dares in asking with a challenging tone and look, watching her completely intently, wanting to know how bold she is, pushing her a little to say or not to say what she really wants from him.
As Otto hides in his chair and holds a hand to his face, not being able to believe this is really happening.
And Rivers looks completely serious and annoyed at Aemond, who starts to look amused by his lack of response. So the next thing he does is point to the contracts on the table in front of him, extending them to both of them.
"So… do we have a deal or not?"
He inquires, not wanting to waste any more time and wanting to get this over with once and for all, watching them expectantly.
Strong and Rivers exchange a glance, where Rivers still has his serious and annoyed look, but also has something else on his mind after fully analyzing this new Aemond now that he is he boss.
So he silently nods in his uncle's direction, making Strong extend his hand to place the papers in front of him to sign them.
But just as his fingertips touch the paper, Aemond abruptly puts them back in front of him, leaving them out of his reach, drawing the attention of all three instantly and more so of his grandsire who already feels completely relieved after so much.
But Aemond's attitude is alarming just then.
"Before you sign, I need to tell you something important."
All three of them frown, especially his grandsire.
"And it can't be after the two finally sign?" he inquires without having the patience for any more of this.
Aemond lets out a long breath, looking at his grandfather and then Rivers directly, wanting to be completely clear with his words.
"I want you to know that in another occasion I would have really appreciated having the opportunity to work with you and partner with your company, I really would," he tells her honestly, "But you never acted the right way, neither did you," he turns to his grandsire to focus back on Rivers, pausing slightly, "So I don't need this association anymore."
Surprise and disbelief completely takes over the three of them, but more so on Rivers and Otto, who exchange confused and puzzled looks.
"Aemond, what are you saying?" his grandsire inquires.
"I'm saying that I don't care and I'm not going to do what you tell me anymore nor am I going to let people like you intrude into my personal life," he then tells Rivers with determination.
Rivers looks at him completely offended.
"Me intruding in your personal life? What are you talking about?"
"I think you know perfectly well what i'm talking about, so since you have nothing more to do here, I'm sorry for wasting too much of your time, but you can go now."
His grandsire looks at him in complete surprise and disbelief.
"Aemond—
"If you think I'm going to sit here and allow this treatment of me by you, you are very wrong, I will not tolerate it for another second," Rivers says, getting up from her chair, annoyed and offended, "You need me but this is your loss. Let's see how long it takes before your company goes bankrupt and you lose everything."
Aemond lets out a bitter laugh.
"No, in fact I don't need you," he makes it clear, amused, "And if I needed you, believe me I wouldn't have partnered with you even as my last option," he tells him decisively, "Do you think you're the only company that has partnerships with Essos? Not only you, but also Rodrik Greyjoy, the owner of the Pike company in the Iron Islands, my new partner".
He says and Otto Hightower looks on in complete surprise, not expecting that at all. And this only causes more anger and indignation in Alys Rivers.
"You're going to regret this," Rivers tells him humiliated and annoyed as she grabs her purse and then heads for the exit with big strides, "And my company is never going to be associated with yours, ever!"
"Have a nice day."
Aemond tells her not forgetting his manners and the doors slam shut with a loud slam that still doesn't completely flinch, then looks at his grandfather who looks like he's going to explode at any moment.
"You can leave too," he tells her nonchalantly, rising from his seat, "I've had enough of this shit. I expect your resignation by tomorrow at the latest."
"My resignation?" he repeats, completely bewildered and surprised.
"Yes, your resignation," he affirms him" "Rhaenyra will now take your place while Daemon is left running Dragonstone."
"W-what…? Aemond, you can't do this! I helped you, I supported you, I broke my back for you, I made you what you are now and I put you where you are!"
"Actually yes I can and in fact I already have," he says dispassionately, heading for the exit, "I'm the boss now."
And even hearing their protests and shouts, he leaves the room with him following, causing a huge scene, but once he makes his way to his office, he slams the door in his face and asks Cole to take him out of here immediately and he instantly complies with his order.
And when Aemond sits in his chair, he lets out a long sigh and closes his eye as he drops his head completely on the backrest, no longer feeling that weight on his shoulders and that tension he felt every day all over his body, finally feeling free, relieved and at peace.
It honestly feels good, after so long.
And he sees the positives of him finally being the boss, as he can now do these kinds of things, things he couldn't do before and finally give him that needed balance to his life and work.
But as soon as he leaves his work space and gets home, he again feels that emptiness in his chest and that sadness, not feeling full and like him, knowing full well that you are missing for his life to finally be perfect.
He wishes he could have done all this with you by his side. He still wants to fix everything between him and you, but you being off his radar, it's just impossible.
And he still loves you too much to use money to try to find out where you are, knowing he couldn't do that to you, the woman he still loves with every fiber of his body and heart.
He still misses you, very much. He wants to have one more reason to be this new person he has become, a better person really.
But he respects your decision, even though he still thinks he deserved more.
That same day he sends a message to Helaena asking her when she will come to King's Landing and if she wants to stay with him at his house and that same day at night he receives a message from Floris Baratheon, a friend he and you have in common, finally things being in his favor.
The moment he so deserved arrives when Floris invites him to a pub in the center of the city to celebrate his birthday. And since he knows you and Floris are close friends, he knows you'll be there.
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You thank the driver for dropping you off at your destination after paying him, then you get out of the car, close the door and head towards the entrance of the pub that Floris has chosen to celebrate his birthday.
Today you don't know what's wrong with you, as you suddenly have a very positive mood and attitude that hasn't been seen in you for months, clearly since what happened that day.
But today you have all the willingness to have fun, celebrate with Floris, have a couple of drinks and see what else the night takes you to, you really need it.
So you open the door of the pub to enter, instantly ringing that typical bell that announces a new customer, which draws the attention of some people already inside the place, but you focus on finding Floris and his friends at all the scattered tables.
"Y/N!"
Suddenly someone shouts your name and you turn your head, seeing that it's Floris, calling you from the table they are at and you start to smile, about to head towards all of them, when suddenly, your gaze crosses with a blue eye that you know all too well among all the people at the table.
A blue eye you haven't seen for months.
And your whole world around you fades away.
You freeze completely and a shiver runs down your entire back as you stare at him in shock, attentively and with your lips parted, definitely not expecting to see him, at all.
Your heart starts pounding, your legs turn to jelly and your throat goes dry. You don't know what to do, let alone what to say, you just can't speak or react, nothing.
You don't feel any more that mood of before, that disposition and that attitude, you simply feel like a little girl who wants to hide behind her mother's legs.
The memories of the relationship, the happy moments, the painful moments, everything you went through together comes back to you in an instant. Just as you remember that day, when it all ended, feeling sick to your stomach, suddenly no longer feeling strength in your whole body.
You feel completely trapped in a sea of emotions flooding your mind. The feelings that you had tried to suppress for months, now overwhelm you.
But not only does your whole history with him come back to you, you are also affected by seeing him again physically after so many months because you had not even seen him through a photo on the social media after the breakup.
And to see him now after the passing of his father and that he is now the owner of the most important company in the country, is just more of a surprise for you.
You try not to let the surprise be so noticeable on your face, although you probably already failed at it, seeing now his gorgeous short platinum hair, giving him a completely different air and look, although not in a bad way.
So you assume that those are the reasons why now he has changed. You can't say the same for yourself as he has really changed, physically.
You had never imagined an Aemond with his hair cut short, you never thought about it and now seeing it… it makes you feel a sensation all over your body that you really can't explain.
He looks more… mature and like… an expert in business, which is what he really is. He looks even younger for his age, also more handsome. He looks like a big businessman.
Unable to help yourself, you still can't move, just standing there, clearly affected after seeing your ex-boyfriend again, who Floris immediately jumps to your rescue, while at the same time you see how Aemond says something under his breath to Liam, a friend of his and also yours, to then get up and head towards the bathroom without looking any further in your direction.
You follow him with your gaze, swallowing hard and starting to tremble, while Floris stops in front of you with a small reassuring smile.
"Hey, I'm so happy you came."
She hugs you and you let her, as you really need it and she knows you need it too.
"Easy," she murmurs comfortingly in your ear, "You've got this, take a deep breath."
You blink, as if to clear your thoughts that way, then drop your head defeatedly on her shoulder, inhaling deeply, as she has told you to.
"I'm sorry," she tells you with some pity, feeling your body tense, "The guys mentioned it to him but he said I still wouldn't tell him anything, so in order not to make him feel bad, I decided to invite him too," she tells you sadly.
"No, no, it's okay."
You tell her instantly, turning away to watch her, seeing Floris as your eyes are full of emotions and with effort, you try to nod and understand her, although you really do, since after all, Floris is not only your friend, she is also his friend and you can't blame her, you would never do that.
"I-I… I… I know, I just… I didn't expect it," you confess, trying to compose yourself.
At least he's out of your sight now and that helps a little but still, you know he'll be back soon.
Floris takes your hands gently, offering you his physical support that she hoped would be enough for you in comforting you.
"I know it's all still very fresh in your mind, so if you need to leave, that's fine with me, I'll understand perfectly, don't worry."
"No, no, I mean, yes, it all still feels very fresh but…" you let out a long breath, "Sooner or later it was bound to happen, you know? And it's your birthday!" you exclaim out of nerves, "I-I can't just leave, I-I…" you bite your lips, "Happy birthday, by the way."
Floris smiles.
"Thank you bestie."
You smile back as best you can, still feeling your mind working at full speed, your body feels it more tense than usual and you unconsciously keep on the lookout for him, because he might come back at any second.
You give her the gift you bought for her, then she gives a few words of motivation and finally she leads you with almost everyone to the table.
You greet old friends and also meet other friends of Floris, trying to look calm and relaxed at all times, when in reality, inside you are a bundle of nerves and not calm at all, not at all.
You can see that all your friends… and Aemond's friends too, know that he and you are no longer together, which causes you some discomfort, but for Floris, you decide to face it, him too.
"At any point in the evening you can leave if you need to, really," she reassures you again before you take a seat and you nod in her direction, understanding.
Meanwhile Aemond in the bathroom leans fully into the sink as he breathes through his mouth and closes his eye for a moment, trying to calm himself, letting a sigh escape his lips.
He honestly doesn't understand what has happened to him.
He thought he could, that this is all he's ever wanted so he could have you back with him, but… when he barely laid his eye on you the moment you walked into the place with five meters in front of him, he felt like he was going back to the past.
For all these months, even yesterday, I was waiting for this moment. He was waiting to see you again, to try to talk to you, to try to get you back and now?
He just felt like a scared little boy.
His heart broke into pieces again as he remembered that day, when you decided to break up with him.
And how he felt at that moment, besides the weeks after when he tried to look for you and you wouldn't let him and blocked him from everywhere, he relived it again, feeling every emotion, remembering every tear he shed and all the other pressures he had on him because of his grandsire.
Not to mention the death of his father and his promotion in the company, all in a matter of days, making everything worse.
And although everything is totally different now, he still recognizes that he did not prepare for this moment.
Everything still hurts him, he no longer feels capable, he feels that you will break his heart again, although no more than he broke yours, where he did nothing about it, he only asked for forgiveness, as if that was enough.
Aemond looks at his reflection and tells himself that he must keep calm, keep his posture and not make this any more uncomfortable than it already will be.
But at all times he has this longing in his heart to be able to get you back.
While you now find yourself sitting, having a place at the big table, basically at the other end, away from where he is sitting, trying to calm yourself down from now on, although it is costing you a lot.
And not a moment too soon, Floris places a beer in your hand, murmuring in your ear that your mind needs to stop thinking and worrying too much.
And just as you take a sip, Aemond returns.
You try not to look at him too much, just the same way he tries not to look at you too much as he takes a seat next to Liam again, but unconsciously it's impossible.
The table by the others is full of laughter, while the pub is full of music, with a party atmosphere that really contrasts with your whirlwind of emotions and also with his.
Even though you don't want to, yet when he doesn't notice, you watch him. And this frustrates you. You want to enjoy Floris' birthday, but you can't help the tension you emanate along with him even though they are extreme to extreme.
Every time his gaze meets yours, you avert yours to the other side, nervous and alert, telling yourself that you can't let this disturb you for the entire time you'll be here.
"We're just here to celebrate Floris."
You repeat to yourself in your mind constantly.
On the other side, Aemond's mind doesn't stop spinning. Every time his eye meets yours, he feels a knot in his stomach and in order not to feel too much, he takes a sip of his beer as well and tries to appear unconcerned.
You both feel completely vulnerable, you don't want to make the atmosphere more tense and uncomfortable, so you make an effort to think about Floris and his friends.
You try to distract yourself by talking to other friends, talking to Floris and observing the whole place, but Aemond is always on your mind.
And even though you shouldn't, you ask yourself inevitable questions, unable to control it.
How is he doing?
How is he coping with the fact that he is now the boss?
Did he suffer a lot because of his father's death?
Must he hate me for ending things with him like that?
Did the association with Alys Rivers' company happen?
You let out a long breath, hating your mind at that moment, but you also inevitably begin to answer those questions with assumptions.
You assume he must be fine, since he's here, which surprises you since he didn't have time for almost anything before, so his new position at the company must give him a little more free time, although you don't really know.
You think about whether he must hate you for breaking his heart in such a cruel way, taking advantage of the fact that he had to leave to get on his plane and you guess he must still be seeing Rivers, even the breakup probably made things easier.
You bite the inside of your cheek and scold yourself, since you don't really know anything and take a long swig from your beer bottle, having had enough of you.
Aemond, on his own, in his mind was trying to find a reason or a good excuse to approach you, but he couldn't find the right moment. He wished the words would flow naturally, but every time he imagined a conversation, he felt blocked and unable to utter a word.
As the night progresses, the tension between the two persists, but fortunately it also becomes a little more bearable.
Although you have not spoken and have only exchanged glances, you had taken an important step in facing the past in that same place. But although the purpose was to have fun, neither he nor you did, it was impossible and you just sat in your places for Floris, nothing else.
Luckily everyone else didn't feel uncomfortable or tense because of you two, as little by little the table fills up with more drinks, the guys and he also smoke, the music helps and most of them are getting drunk, except him and you.
Until the hours go by, it's a little past midnight and already some people are starting to leave, Floris' night of celebration slowly coming to an end.
When only Floris, Liam, Sarah, Jenna, him and you are left, therefore, Floris considers the night over. And that's your cue to leave, so you say goodbye to her and everyone except him, taking the opportunity to leave the pub as you see him busy asking for a cigarette.
As you leave the pub, you lean against the wall with your phone in hand and the Uber app on the screen, waiting for a driver to accept your ride, but it keeps asking you to wait every long minute, making you feel desperate and worried.
You know it's only a matter of time before they and he come out and see you here and that's what you don't want.
But luck in that regard is not in your favor.
After continuing to wait for five more long minutes, you grunt under your breath in frustration as the application doesn't tell you anything, besides it's too much to ask for but you don't blame that either as you recognize that your dorm is far from here and you also take the time into consideration.
When then, Floris and all of them leave the pub, instantly her and also him noticing you.
Floris instantly turns to you and you give her a tired and distressed look.
"What's wrong?" she asks you in a low voice.
You bite your lips as you stare at your phone in frustration and answer her in a low voice as well.
"No driver accepts my ride. I don't know what to do."
"Well, Aemond has offered to drive us," she tells you with some caution and even in a low voice, "I'm sure he'll have no problem driving you too."
And here's just what you didn't want.
"No, I-I…" you let out a long breath, "Maybe I should try another app or walk a little further."
"Have you lost your mind?" she reproaches you in a whisper.
"I'm not going to ask him to drive me too," you clarify, frustrated and sad, "I've had enough."
"Come on, Y/N. I'll ask him."
Aemond, actually hears everything from a distance and realizes the situation, so he notices how Floris watches him and also how you try to watch him from the corner of your eye, noticing how you move your fingers across the screen of your phone in a desperate way.
And just then Liam speaks in his direction.
"I don't think we're all going to fit," he tells him as he points to his car.
He lets out a long breath as he pulls his keys out of his pocket, unlocking the doors.
"Get in, everyone."
He says in his voice loud enough for everyone and especially you to hear, without even looking at you, he also says it with a nonchalant tone, then starts across the street, heading to his car, which is big and spacious enough for everyone.
He listens as you and Floris speak again, but it's not so audible to him anymore, with the others following him to the car as well.
Tonight hasn't been the best, neither was the way you both ended it, but he still cares about you and your well-being, as there was no way he was going to leave you here alone, at almost two in the morning.
And when he gets in the car, he thought he would have to stand still, waiting for you, to the point of having to tell you himself that he will drop you off at home, but in the end he sees you following Floris with a look that he can't really describe.
Liam gets in as co-pilot and all the girls settle in the back seats, you too.
And pretty soon he's driving through the city, watching you in the rearview mirror from time to time, unable to help himself, while you watch him too when he doesn't notice, biting the inside of your cheek and feeling completely nervous.
And you don't know if it was intentional, but it really wasn't, Aemond just started asking for directions and those who had their houses closest to them spoke, leaving Sarah first, then Floris, Liam and at the end there's Jenna and you.
"My dorm is in Walden Residence, it's on the first block of the university," she indicates to Aemond and then she looks at you, "You live in a dorm too?"
You nod, feeling unable to speak.
"In which residence?"
You swallow hard, as you lick your lips.
"Westbridge."
"Oh! Then you'll drop me off first, her dorm is further in the back," she says to Aemond, who starts the car again.
Oh fuck.
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general taglist:
@melsunshine @n4forlife @iamavailablesstuff @ttkttt @elliaze @trshngyn @tsujifreya @imsoshygirl @watercolorskyy @kckt88 @zenka69 @yentroucnagol @crispmarshmallow @bellastwd @queenofshinigamis @strangersunghoon @happinessinthebeing @iloveallmyboys @twobluejeans @siriusdumblittlepuppy
taglist next part:
@anehkael @randomstory56 @crazylokonugget @minttea07
599 notes · View notes
circeyoru · 2 months
Note
Hi.. Can I ask for yandere alastor with the reader who owns his soul, ( more questions because I'm curious about this scenario )....
What would it be like if the reader, through guilt, gave her soul to Alastor, like it would be fair for the reader to give her soul to Alastor, since he gave his soul to the reader ( would Alastor see this as a distorted marriage proposal? as a declaration of love, distorted? )
What would it be like if the others at the hotel found out about this relationship between Alastor and reader? What would it be like if there were more than 1 yandere, what would it be like if vox or lucifer slowly became yanderes for the reader, what would happen?
To those that have no idea what this is talking about, check out {Unwanted Soul}
I am not kidding when I say there's a back-to-back request on the first question. So I had to answer in the other request cause this second question's answer's gonna be a long one
For the 2nd question.
Part 1. Basically, Charlie and the other's reaction to finding out about Alastor and Reader's relationship, including the soul-owning thing (but not the details like limited power, or you healing Alastor)
As a baseline, they all unanimously agreed that Alastor was the one completely and utterly obsessed with you, and you just accepted it and made the best of the situation. Niffty: She doesn't see an issue. Alastor had mentioned you to her beforehand. She was also the one to fix up your room before you moved in. She encourages and even asks for your secret. How did you get bad boy Alastor to commit to you? She wants some of the action too. (you told Alastor to keep Niffty away from you whenever she's in that crazy zone, but then you got used it to, somewhat) Husk: He thought he could use it to his advantage. You were the timid and quiet type. So he actually tried to get your sympathy to his situation, Alastor was being threatening, Alastor was being mean. Haha, no go. Because you didn't care. He picked up that your attention and interest is very limited and hard to gain, Alastor taking years to do so even. Now Husk gave up on trying to get you to help his situation, but when he saw Alastor acting that docile to you and you not using your powers against Alastor? He's envious that you weren't the one to hold his soul Angel: Shocked. 100% shocked that Alastor willingly given his soul to a weaker demon (he never saw you battling Adam or your powers and abilities in action). Similar to Husk, he's actually envious that you didn't do anything against Alastor's will, even when you have his soul in the palm of your hands. He saw that Alastor was as free as a bird, really. He also wanted that freedom that Alastor had and the bond you two shared. He's very confused as to why Alastor was that enamoured with you though, you weren't anything special (don't let Alastor hear that). He spoke to you since about it and you agreed without missing a beat. Yeah, he's so confused Vaggie: A bit of Husk and Angel's reaction. She's shocked that you own Alastor's soul and have his affection, confused that Alastor gave his soul to you and acts lovey-dovey with you, and grateful that you were the one to have Alastor's soul. While it was a bit to take in, knowing that you were less inclined to violence and destruction, you weren't a threat to the hotel or Charlie. So that was good. Still, she is aware that your emotions can flip easily and Alastor will act on them faster than you'd stop him or you just won't. She knows you're a landmine and she needs to be careful Charlie: Very very supportive. Her brain literally skipped the whole soul-owning bit. Alastor loves you a lot and you love Alastor in your own unique way. It's like her and Vaggie! She's so happy to have another couple in the hotel. She'd try arranging double dates, if that's possible. Alastor's 100% for it since he gets to spend time with you, but knows you'd rather not have other strangers (Charlie and Vaggie) roped into your hobby and interest. She tries to give relationship advice and ask for some from you and Alastor. The first few times, you let her, but then you got annoyed with it. It wasn't established that you and Alastor were a couple and he didn't mind, with that label also coming out of Charlie's mouth. You were quick to avoid her whenever you wandered around the hotel. Alastor steps in and strictly warns Charlie not to try helping again Lucifer: Very hesitant to accept it, but lets his skeptism go when he sees you were happy and fine with the situation. He's amazed that you got Alastor to give his soul to you that easily, but he's also scared that you might have gotten into deep sh*t with you connection with Alastor. He keeps an eye out for you, sometimes checking in with you too
Part 2. What if there's more yanderes for Reader?
Are you trying to exhaust yourself? Yanderes you mentioned, Lucifer and Vox crave attention and you don't exactly give a lot. Remember, you're a shut-in and you can do without the extra presence around you. Since Alastor is more than enough (he's so happy to hear that). Needless to say, you avoid a repeat of what happened to Alastor. You read and watch anime, you know the signs. The reason why Alastor was let into your life was because he was the one giving you attention and didn't hinder you, plus he grew on you. Another thing, time. It took Alastor 7 years and you still sent him away to the hotel to work for some minor interest of yours. You think there can just be a new yandere? No, no. You're happy to prove that you were no pushover. Alastor is essentially under your command and he will happily take your orders and fulfil them beyond your expectations. So Vox is trying to spy on you? "Cut off his power, Alastor." Yeah, the Vee's entire area was out of electricity for a good few days. Lucifer's breaking into your room? "Alastor, set up a barrier." You're in some form of shadow realm, curtsy of Alastor's power, with all you ever need. You are the type to stick to one extreme and have sides as 'back-up', you can have Lucifer as a friend, but never a yandere since you can't handle it. As for Vox? You don't even know him. At least with Lucifer, you once worked for him. Plus Vox is Alastor's rivial, right? Let them fight, you're sure Alastor can handle it even with his powers limited.
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theriverdraws · 2 years
Text
ANALYZING THIS ONE NOELLE UPDATE ABOUT SUSIE AND KRIS BECAUSE HOLY FUCK.
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First of all, I might be biased, but since this "post" is called "The newest girl", and Susie seems to really hate Kris in particular, I feel like this is great proof for the "Susie was from a human community" theory. Because she seems to really dislike Kris - who is the only human in the city - for no particular reason.
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Also Susie never bullying Noelle because she was the only person who was ever nice to Susie... I love them so much.
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Well, even if Kris cared about it they wouldn't be able to do anything because.... Yeah. But considering later additions to this it doesn't seem like Kris ever hated Susie? The thought of "wasting no opportunity to expell her from school" is something they never thought of, and they seemed to get the worst of it. Who knows, Kris is weird snsjsjs.
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We know that Susie being "mean" is more of a persona she puts up since no one is nice to her, so it's really hard to read her true intentions here but I mean if I were to assume.. Susie has very bad eating habits, and it seems like she's trying to warn Kris here but she's not being nice about it.
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.. And she made Kris laugh! They maybe thought it was a joke, or maybe it's just their weird sense of humor but it seems like they really vibed with Susie's whole thing, because they are both literally the same level of chaos. They seemed to like her while she hated their guts.
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Susie clearly misinterprets Kris' reaction and throws the apple at them and we can see Kris being a true gamer and also a weird little shit kRIS DON'T EAT THE APPLE WHAT ARE YOU DOING--
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And then Susie makes an oopsie. Listen, I know Susie and Kris are THE bestest of friends now, and it's very clear that they like each other a lot, and can never be separated, but I really hope they talk it out about everything she said.
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Because that clearly hit Kris really hard. While Kris sure has uh, a lot of other worse things to worry about now, I'm sure they would still remember this no? They really need to talk everything out I think :(. Perhaps in the diner scene in ch4 haha hello please Toby?
(Also maybe Susie was projecting a bit when she said that? It's very unclear if she has parents soo, it would make sense) .
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This part is very interesting. Because if Kris really did say something, there's no way that what they said was a threat. If a threat scared Susie that much, I doubt that she would completely brush it off and start bullying them again in the future. But what else could have they said to make Susie run away like that?
Well, we do know Kris is going through a lot, so I imagine they probably had a pretty bad reaction that wouldn't be a threat, but it would make Susie leave, out of shock perhaps?
So what I think Kris would have said (if they said anything at all, and it wasn't just their expression) , would be some short but very self-deprecating sentence like: "Yeah. She would". And that, together with whatever face they were making, would be enough to push Susie away I think. Anyway those are my 2 cents to this.
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Also Noelle hid inside the locker lmao, and Kris knew she was there all the time and just slowly shut the door on her again. They're so weird I love them so much.
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badgerbl00d · 1 year
Text
one piece boys falling in love at first sight
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☆ characters: ace, rayleigh, marco
☆ up next: one piece characters with a jealous gf
☆ a/n: my last post generated a lot of new followers and requests! i'm so happy and am excited to start working on all the requests. i also will be posting a master list soon so thank u for being patient with me on that front haha. enjoy! &lt;3
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ace
1k words
“Welcome aboard!!”
Cheers erupted from the crew, as they all swarmed the deck.
Joining the Whitebeard Pirates was always celebrated with an enormous party. 
The sun had started to set but it still beat down relentlessly on the ship and Ace craned his neck to try and get a better view.
You were all the crew had been talking about for weeks. 
Some thief who had managed to steal from the Whitebeard Pirates and get away with it. 
He remembers how Whitebeard laughed when Izo and Thatch came moping back from inventory, nearly pissing themselves when they were forced to admit they’d been got by an amateur. 
Whitebeard had ordered that you be tracked down immediately because anyone who stole from him with that much skill and audacity deserved a spot on his crew. 
After a few weeks of searching, Izo came back with you. 
From what he’d heard you weren’t easy to convince. 
There was alcohol being passed around and the spray of champagne bottles being opened left and right misted his neck. 
He pushed through everyone and began making his way toward the front.
He eventually bumped into Marco who’d secured a front-row seat, downing beer as your fellow pirates all came to get a look at you. 
“What’s the big fuss? Can’t get any damn sleep around here,” he groaned. 
Marco laughed, “Jealous that you’re not the shiny new toy anymore?”
“Barely.”
Both men had given up on trying to get a look at you and decided they’d wait for everything to die down.
“Want a beer?” 
Ace nodded and readily accepted the cool can, chugging it within seconds.
“It’s hot as hell out here.”
Marco took another sip of his drink, “If you feel hot how do you think I feel.”
“Well you’re kind of fire too, you know, like- the whole phoenix thing is-”
“Yeah, yeah, but it’s different though.”
“I mean, you could argue that the blue fire is hotter than the red part.”
“Yeah, dumbass, but the point of my devil fruit isn’t fire.”
“Okay well, they’re close enough.”
The heat got the better of the both of them and they gave up their argument, both fairly moody at the heat and the noise. 
“When’s the food part starting.”
“Soon probably, apparently Thatch has the hots for the kid.”
Ace choked a bit on his drink.
“What do you mean? Like he thinks he’s hot?”
“She.”
This caught Ace even more off-guard. 
“She!?”
Now he really wanted to get a look at you.
After another few minutes, the crowd relented, and people started making their way back to the rest of the ship. 
As the group of cheering pirates around you thinned, you felt relief flooding your senses. 
You took a deep breath and walked on board the Moby Dick.
It was massive. Now that you could actually see it, you realized just how intimidating of a ship this really was. Of course, you’d had a general idea since you did rob it blind, but still. It was different when you were a welcome guest. 
Ace took his chance now, and as the last of your welcoming party dissipated he made his way over to you.
As if on cue, you turned to look at him. 
The sun was positioned perfectly behind your head and framed you in a sort of angelic light, it poured up and over your frame from behind you, casting golden hues through your h/c hair. 
He stopped in his tracks, one foot still caught mid-step, trailing behind the other.
You were… pretty.
The slight breeze that had been brought with sunset, swept through your hair, leaving your face completely out in the open.
Your lips were slightly parted, had you been saying something?
He didn’t know, he was too enraptured with everything else. 
You stood tall, it was clear you had pride to spare.
Your tan skin glimmered with the same regal hue as your hair, and never in his life had Ace felt that something- someone had commanded his attention so thoroughly with just their presence. 
You walked toward him, Oh my god she’s walking toward me.
He was proud and he had abundant confidence in his worth but if he’d ever doubted that, it was now that he did. 
You extended a hand towards Ace, and as if moving through honey your movement was gentle and smooth, but certain. 
“Hi! I’m Y/n, I think I’ve seen your wanted posters before. You-”
Whatever else you said wasn’t registered by the freckled boy in front of you. 
His cheeks were red and his eyes set.
He was breathing deeply, hanging onto everything you did, drinking in the magnificent sight of you.
He instinctively reached his hand up toward his head to take off his hat and hold it against his chest.
Your voice was silky and hung in the air like cigarette smoke. 
The way you looked at him, your eyes intensely focused and direct, had his knees feeling shaky. 
Any ounce of ego left in his body from the first sight of you, drained out of him as you spoke.
His brain was flushed with sudden anxieties.
Had he come across as a creep? What if you took to the other guys? He was young and maybe you wanted something else? Maybe you didn’t even want a guy at all and your ambitions involving piracy had nothing to do with men! 
You looked at him with a puzzled look, your nose wrinkled slightly.
“Are you okay?”
Fuck, she’s so cute.
If he had been less out of it, he would have heard Marco’s cackling in the background.
“Real smooth, Ace!” Thatch yelled from the balcony outside the kitchen.
You laughed, She laughed!
Ace blinked back the muddled thoughts and premature anxieties that had started fuzzing his thoughts. 
You were giggling to yourself and seemed nearly ready to try and introduce yourself to the next person. 
Ace had a million things he wanted to say to you, but he had time. You both had all the time in the world. 
So he instead opted to tip his hat and flash you a smile. 
“Hi.”
rayleigh
1k words
A quick stop, Roger had promised.
No more than two days, he’d said.
Everyone knew he was lying, and that they’d be landbound for at least a week, but no one was going to complain.
Almost no one.
“Roger, we should get going,” Rayleigh urged, but the Captain was three beers and ฿3,000 into a game of poker. They wouldn’t be leaving until morning.
Roger laughed loudly, earning stares from the bar's patrons. 
“What’re you in such a rush for?! There’re women and booze all over the island, go find some to your liking and quit complainin’!” He laughed again and Rayleigh gave up and decided he’d just head back to the ship for now. He’d send someone to pick up the captain in the morning. 
He didn’t mind the island itself. It was a spring island, and the clime sat at a gentle temperature, with easy-going winds. Tall grass covered the majority of the island and flowers were in bloom all over. 
Yellow daffodils and pink tulips littered the island, dotting the hills and fields with spots of color. 
He made his way slowly back toward the ship, taking more time than usual to enjoy the scenery. If he was going to be stuck here he may as well enjoy it. 
The sun was just about the set, and vibrant hues of orange colored the sky and with his hands in his pockets, he wandered through the hills back to sea. 
The island had no real port, there was just a bay where ships parked. There weren’t any walkways or built-in passages from which to disembark from the ship, you simply had to drop the anchor and paddle or swim to the rocky shore. The grass grew right up to the edge of the ocean, and he sat down in it, deciding he’d wait until it got dark. 
A soft rustling to his left caught his attention.
Tucked in the grass, was a girl sleeping, a book in her hands. 
She was wearing a white dress, and it moved together with the grass, back and forth, pushed by the wind.
A cool breeze ran through your body and with a slight shiver, you slowly blinked your eyes open, pushing yourself up onto your elbows, rolling onto your stomach. 
You flipped through the pages of your book, going back and forth a few times before deciding to close it altogether. 
You sat up, stretching your arms out over your head, letting your hair fall over your shoulders. 
Rayleigh was, for lack of a better term, entranced. 
He was completely hypnotized by the sight of you. 
He felt as though you’d materialized before him, a beautiful fairy or something similar.
He’d heard stories of sailors coming across women whose beauty stopped them in their tracks. Women that they thought about every night after those initial encounters, held a complete hold on their minds.
He thought that now he felt something similar. 
He felt awkward just sitting and watching you, and thought he might say something. 
A tug in his chest urged him to stand up and try and present himself, but he felt an irritating nervousness spread throughout his body.
C’mon, Rayleigh.
He was usually so… good at this. 
If he saw a pretty girl at a bar or a port or an island he would just talk to her. 
Everything after that came naturally. 
He was a Roger pirate for god’s sake, people around the globe feared him and revered him, and yet… and yet with every breath, he took to try and start a sentence he came up blank. 
The thirty seconds he’d spent trying to speak to you felt like an hour and he thought his heart might stop when you’d turned around to look at him. 
“Oh! Hello!”
He drew in a breath. 
The colored sunset light fell on your face and illuminated your features in soft hues.
Your eyes widened slightly at the man standing before you and you gave him an awkward smile. 
“Have you been standing there a long time?”
An accusatory look settled on your face, and your lips settled into a frustrated pout.
“I, um, yes,” he admitted, a blush creeping onto his face, “I wasn’t- I mean- I had just sat here to enjoy the, um-”
“Yeah, yeah, you creep, I get it.”
You laughed as you said this, and he relaxed a little.
“You’re not from around here are you?” you asked.
“What gave it away?”
“You seem surprised that someone was sleeping outside. It’s normal here, I swear I’m not some weirdo or anything. Our grass is known for being soft.”
He sat back down, slightly closer to you this time.
“What’s that?”
You sat closer to him, pointing to the log pose on his wrist. 
“It’s a compass. Pirates use it on the Grand Line, it works by using the magnetism from each island to route the way toward the next one.”
“You’re a pirate! You don’t look like one! Or act like one.”
“Don’t be so sure.”
You giggled, and he felt completely swept up by your presence. How quickly you started trusting him, the curiosity in your voice that only grew with each question he answered. 
You continued asking him questions, what being a pirate was like, why he was a pirate, and who else did he know that was a pirate. Had he killed anybody?
The more you talked, the more he started feeling like himself. His wittiness and sarcasm started slowly coming back to him, he was able to put aside his awe for your beauty in exchange for his usual flirtiness.
The dynamic between you seemed to shift back and forth between who felt bold and who felt shy. 
“Do you drink?”
“Do I look like I drink?”
Rayleigh laughed, and you joined him. 
Night had set hours ago, yet you kept talking as though you had all the time in the world.
You inched even closer to him, he sat with his legs crossed, and you sat on your knees, feet tucked underneath you. 
You were facing each other and you leaned forward, bringing your lips closer to his.
“When do you leave?”
He tucked some stray pieces of hair behind your ear, trailing a hand down your face.
You rested your head against his palm, looking up at him. 
“Soon.”
“That’s too bad. I like you a lot. You’re more than a pretty face.”
Rayleigh smiled at that, “I haven’t heard that one before!”
In a burst of energy and eagerness you pressed your lips to his, and just as quickly retracted. 
He smiled again, bigger this time, and brought his arms around your waist, holding you in place. 
You pressed another kiss to his lips, still too quickly for him to reciprocate. 
He laughed and you felt proud at the blush you saw coloring his cheeks. 
“Tell me, pirate, are you busy tonight?”
“Not at all, pretty.”
“Would you like to be?”
“Very much.
marco 
1.2k words
“Why can’t you send Ace to do it?”
“‘Cause I sent ‘im to go get fish from the market,” Thatch explained, “And before you ask, I can’t go either ‘cause I’ll be here. Cooking.”
“Alright, alright, I’ll be back soon.”
Marco threw on a sweater and made his way into the town they were staying in. Thatch was all worked up and excited since they’re known for their produce and food quality.
Naturally, everyone had been sent out to get different ingredients for him.
Marco looked down at the short list he was given, ‘Apples’. 
‘Very concise,’ he thought to himself. 
It was midday and the sun was shining. It was fairly warm on the island, and it was covered in trees. 
There were several signs that pointed him towards the location of the apple farm your family owned. 
He found it with ease and walked around for a bit when he didn’t see anyone out front. 
Every tree was teaming with ripe apples of all kinds. Overripe ones littered the floor and there were some chickens walking around. 
He had been walking for no more than five minutes before he saw you.  
You were reaching up to try and grab the apples that were up on the higher branches of the tree.
You strained your arms upward, using the trunk of the tree as support, your long legs balancing on the tips of your toes. 
Your short dress slid up against your thighs, revealing a soft tan line. 
A few beads of sweat formed on your forehead and after your third reach with no success, you gave up. 
He could feel the pace of his heartbeat start to pick up slightly. 
You looked so calm and at ease. The line of your body as you stretched upward was tantalizing and he couldn’t look away. 
He didn’t want to scare you so he gently cleared his throat.
You turned around in a panic, knocking over a few of the apples in the full baskets that were on the floor next to you.
“Oh! Welcome! Sorry! Sorry- I’m the only one in today and I was trying to get a few more baskets full,” you explained to him. 
“No worries,” Marco said. His voice was deep and he sounded so laid back. 
You were still a bit too far to converse at a normal volume so you walked to him, caught off-guard by how handsome he was. 
He wasn’t wearing anything surprising, nor was he doing anything that was out of the ordinary but you could tell that he wasn’t from around here. 
His hands were calloused and he had a few visible scars spread across the visible parts of his skin.
“What can I get for you today,” you smiled at him. 
“I was sent out for apples! I suppose I’ll take two baskets pleas-”
Marco’s voice trailed off and he cut off his own sentence as he looked and actually made eye contact with you. 
Oh, god. 
He knew you’d probably be hot based on what he’d seen earlier but you were… unspeakably beautiful. 
Your cheeks were full and bright.
Your lips were a lively pink and your eyes caught the shifting glimmers of sunlight in them.
Your hair was pulled back into two messy braids and your loose strands of hair swept back and forth over your face. 
You were unbelievably flattered. 
Naive as you were to love and its complications, you knew what a tempted man looked like. 
An unfamiliar sensation tugged at your chest. You felt like the tendons and muscles around your heart were opening and contracting wildly. 
Your breath hitched in your throat and settled itself right on your vocal cords, you couldn’t say anything. 
You both held a hilariously awkward form of eye contact for several moments. 
Marco swallowed and cleared his mind, regaining his composure to the best of his ability.
“Two of these,” he said again, blinking his gaze down toward the floor as he gestured down toward the basket. 
You took a deep breath and nodded, grabbing another basket for him. 
They were heavier than they looked and after watching your two failed tries at lifting the baskets, Marco offered some help. “Oh, y-yes, please! Thanks,” you said, stepping back as he walked over and picked up the baskets with ease.
“How much do I owe ya?”
“Um.. j-just ฿15.”
“Fifteen?! That’s it?”
“We have, um, a discount going on right now... For handsome travelers.”
Why would I say that? Oh my god, why would I say that!? your cheeks started to rapidly heat up and you shuffled your feet nervously.
Your heart started beating faster against your chest when Marco responded, “How sweet. Take this as a tip then.”
He had a devilishly handsome smile on his face, and you looked at the money he was handing you. “Oh fifty is way too much- I can’t accept that, that’s more than the two baskets would normally be anyway.”
“Well, this is what I always tip beautiful girls.”
You laughed, trying to ignore the rising temperature of your face. 
How embarrassing to be this easily flustered. 
He smiled at you, clearly enjoying himself. 
“C’mon, I insist,” he closed your hand around the money and gently guided your hand back toward your chest. 
You pouted, feeling guilty that he gave you so much money.
“You’re sure?”
“Sweetheart, I’m a pirate,” he said, “There’s a lot more where this came from.”
His voice was full of confidence but he was so relaxed. 
It made your stomach twist.
The way he carried himself- you could tell he was dangerous, but he was so laid back. 
“A pirate?”
He nodded.
You put the money away, and played with the ends of your braids, unsure of what to say to him. 
He bent down, one arm on each side of you.
Your breath caught in your throat and you stood frozen still.
He picked up the baskets, one in each hand, from your sides.
“As much as I’d love to spend the rest of my day here, I’m afraid I have to report back soon.”
You nodded, sheepishly looking down at the floor. 
He smiled at you again, winking this time. 
He turned and started walking back toward the entrance.
You knew you’d probably never see him again and a kind of unknown anxiety made its way to your chest. 
“Wait!” you called out, running after him.
He turned around.
“Will... Will I see you again?”
This time a less nonchalant smile spread across the Commander’s face. 
“Oh, absolutely,” he teased, “I’ve got wanted posters in every town from here to North Blue.”
You pouted again.
So cute! Marco thought to himself.
“You know what I mean.”
“I can work something out.”
“What’s your name?” you asked.
“Marco,” he answered, “What’s yours?”
“Y/n.”
“Pretty name for a pretty face.”
You smiled. 
He couldn’t help but stare. 
It suddenly dawned on Marco the Phoenix, First Commander of the Whitebeard Pirates, that he was positively, undoubtedly fucked. 
You stood in front of him, waiting for him to say something else. 
“You’ll see me again,” he said, this time with unwavering certainty,
“I’ll pick you up tomorrow at 6. Don’t make plans for the next morning.”
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transmutationisms · 11 months
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serious question but do you personally believe there is a way to approach psychiatry in a way that uplifts and upholds patient autonomy and wellness or is the entire trade essentially fucked haha. Btw this is an ask coming from a 3rd year med student—with a background of severe mental illness—who is considering a residency in psychiatry after receiving life-saving care in high school pertaining to said conditions. (I have peers who have been involuntarily hospitalized and treated horribly in psych wards, with approaches i patently disagree with, but was lucky not to experience. I don’t like modern american medicine’s approach to mental illness; “throw pills” at it to “make it go away” ie. a problem of overprescribing, inadequate and non-holistic approach to mental health, and i feel a lot of that can be attributed to the capitalistic framework. I also def agree with you that so much of what can be considered normal human responses to traumatic events/normal human suffering can be unnecessarily pathologized—a great example being the whole “chemical imbalances in the brain is the ONLY reason why im like this” argument that ive unfortunately fallen hard for when i was younger and am still currently dismantling within myself…and like dont even get me started on this field’s history of demonizing POC, women, LGBT, etc). Like i deeply love my psych rotations so far, and i utterly feel in my gut that this is the manner in which i would like to help people—a lot of whom are just like me—but im wondering if there is a way to reconcile these aspects in a way that one can feel morally okay participating within such an imperfect system, in ur opinion… ngghhhhhh i just want to be a good doctor to my patients…
(ps i love all ur writing and analysis on succession!! big fan mwah <333)
i don't mean to sound unduly pissy at you, specifically, but i do have to say: every single time i've talked about antipsych or broader criticism of medicine on this website, i immediately get a wave of responses like this, from doctors/nurses/psychs/students of the above, asking me to, like, reassure them that they're not doing something immoral or un-communist or whatever by having or pursuing these jobs. and it's honestly frustrating. why is it that these conversations get re-framed around this particular line of inquiry and medical ego-soothing? why is it that when i say "the medical encounter is not structured to protect patient autonomy or well-being," so many people hear something more along the lines of "doctors are mean and i wish they were nicer"? why is it that it's impossible to discuss the philosophical and structural violence of academic and clinical medicine without it becoming a referendum on the individual morality of doctors?
i'm choosing to read you in good faith because i think it's possible to re-re-frame this line of questioning to demonstrate to you the sorts of critiques and inquiries i find more interesting and more conducive to patient autonomy and liberation. so, let me pick apart a few lines of this ask.
"is the entire trade essentially fucked?"
if you're thinking of trying to 'reform' the project of medical psychology within existing infrastructures and institutions, then yeah, it's fucked. if you're still assuming that affective distress can only be 'treated' within this medical apparatus (despite, again, no psychiatric dx satisfying any pathologist's understanding of a 'disease' ie an aberration from 'normal' physiological functioning) then you're not challenging the things that actually make psychiatry violent. you're simply fantasising about making the violence nicer.
"I don’t like modern american medicine’s approach to mental illness; “throw pills” at it to “make it go away” ie. a problem of overprescribing, inadequate and non-holistic approach to mental health, and i feel a lot of that can be attributed to the capitalistic framework."
i hate when i talk about psychotropic drugs being marketed to patients using lies like the chemical imbalance myth, and then pushed on patients—including through outright force—by psychiatrists, and the discussion gets re-framed as one about 'overprescribing'. my problem is not with people taking drugs. i am, in fact, so pro-drugs that i think even the ones administered in a clinical setting sometimes have value. my issue is with, again, the provision of misleading or outright false information, the use of force and coercion to put patients on such drugs in order to force social conformity and employability, and the general model of medicine and medical psychology that assumes patients ought to be passive recipients of medical enlightenment rather than active participants in their own treatment who are given the agency to decide when and how to engage with any form of curative or meliorative intervention.
'holistic' medicine and psychiatry do not solve this problem! they are not a paradigm shift because they continue to locate expertise and epistemological authority with the credentialed physician, and to position patients as too sick, stupid, or helpless to do anything but receive and comply with the medical interventions. there are certainly psychotropic drugs that are demonstrably more harmful than others (antipsychotics, for example), and some that are demonstrably prescribed to patients who do not benefit from them and are even harmed by them. conversely, there are certainly forms of intervention besides pharmaceuticals that people may find helpful. but my general critique here is aimed less at haggling over specific methods of intervention, and more at the ideological and philosophical tenets of medicine that cause any interventions to be imposed by force or coercion on patients, then framed as being 'for their own good'. were suffering people given the information and autonomy to actually choose whether and how to engage in any kind of intervention, some might still choose drugs! my position here is not one of moralising drugs, but making the act of taking them one that is freely chosen and available as an option without relying on physician determination of a patient's interests over their own assessment of their needs and wants.
"so much of what can be considered normal human responses to traumatic events/normal human suffering can be unnecessarily pathologized"
true, but don't misunderstand me as saying that drugs or any other form of intervention should be forcibly withheld from those who do want them and are made fully aware of what risks and harms seeking them could entail. again, this would still be an authoritarian model; my critique is aimed at increasing patient autonomy, not at creating equally authoritarian and empowered doctors who just have slightly different treatment philosophies.
"dont even get me started on this field’s history of demonizing POC, women, LGBT, etc"
ok, framing this as "demonisation" tells me that you're not understanding that, again, this is a systemic and structural critique. it is certainly true that a great many doctors currently are, and have historically have been, outright racist, trans/misogynist, ableist, and so on. framing this as a problem of a well-intentioned discipline being corrupted by some assholes is getting it backwards. medicine attracts prejudiced people, not to mention strengthens and promotes these prejudices in its entire training and practice infrastructures, because of its underlying philosophical orientation toward enforcing 'normality' as defined by 18th-century statistics and 19th-century human sciences that explicitly place white, cis, able-bodied european men as the normal ideal that everyone else is inferior to or failing to live up to. doctors who really nicely tell you that you're too fat are still using bmi charts that come from the statistical anthropometry of adolphe quételet and the flawed actuarial calculations of metlife insurance. doctors who really nicely deny you access to transition surgery are still operating under a paradigm that gives the practitioner authority over expressions and embodiments of gender. the issue isn't 'demonisation', it's that medicine and psychiatry explicitly attempt to render judgments about who and what is 'normal' and therefore socially 'healthy', and enforce those standards on patients. this is not a promotion of patient well-being, but of social conformity.
"i deeply love my psych rotations so far, and i utterly feel in my gut that this is the manner in which i would like to help people"
let me ask you a few questions. you say that you like your psych rotations... but how do your patients feel about them? is their autonomy protected? are they in treatment by free choice, and free to leave any time they wish? are they treated as human beings with full self-determination? if you witnessed a situation in which a patient was coerced or forced into a certain treatment, or in which you were not sure whether they were consenting with full knowledge or freedom, would you feel empowered to intervene? or would doing so threaten your career by exposing you to anger and retaliation from your higher-ups? what higher-ups will you be exposed to as a resident, and then as a practicing physician? could you practice in a way that committed fully, 100%, to patient autonomy if you were working at someone else's practice, or in a hospital or clinic? could you, according to current medical guidelines, even if you had your own practice?
when you say "this is the manner in which i would like to help people", what do you mean by "this"? can you define your philosophy of treatment, and the relationship and power dynamic you want to have with any future patients? is it one in which you hold authority over them and see yourself as determining what's in their 'best interests', even over their own expressed wishes? have you connected with patient advocates, psych survivors (other than your friends), and radical psychiatrists and anti-psychiatrists who may espouse heterodox treatment philosophies that you could consider? do you think such philosophies are sufficient for protecting patient autonomy and well-being, or are they still models that position the physician's judgment and authority over that of the patient?
"im wondering if there is a way to reconcile these aspects in a way that one can feel morally okay participating within such an imperfect system"
and here is the crux of the problem with this entire ask. you are wondering how to sleep at night, if you are participating in a career you find morally distasteful. where, though, do your patients enter into that equation? do you worry about how they sleep at night, after having interacted with a system of social violence that may very well have traumatised them under the guise of providing help? why does your own guilty conscience worry you more than violations of your patients' bodies, minds, and basic self-determination?
i can't tell you whether your career path is morally acceptable to you. i don't think this type of guilt or self-flagellation is fruitful and i don't think it helps protect patients. i don't, frankly, have a handy roadmap sitting around for creating a new system of medicine and health care that rests on patient autonomy. affective distress is real, and is not something we should have to bear alone or with the risk of having violence inflicted upon us. what you need to ask yourself is: how does the medical model and establishment serve people experiencing such distress? how does it perpetuate violence against them? and how do you see yourself countering, or perpetuating, such violence as someone operating within this discipline? what would it mean to be a 'good' actor within a violent system, if you do indeed believe that such a thing is ontologically possible?
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thethingsweneversaid · 9 months
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Am I crazy or did I just crack the mystery of the monologue scene????
Why did they lose against Vecna in season 4? What were they missing?
They lost the race against time. Time was obviously significant this season (The grandfather clock, Vecna's obsession with time, the UD being frozen in time). The time was simply up, they were too late. Who’s to blame? Mike Wheeler. 
Okay, let me explain, haha.
Throughout the whole series we all know Mike being late, or almost late to things is recurring. Every season in fact. S1: Mike’s campaign was too long, and he tried to get the party to stay past their curfew. S2: Mike was trying to get in contact with El on his walkie, almost making him late to the arcade. S3: Mike was almost late to the cinema because he was with El, making them almost miss the beginning of the movie. S4: Mike was reading El’s letter, almost making him and Nancy late for school... He begins every season with a race against time. Also worth noting that El was the reason for him being late in s2, s3 and s4. Also ALSO worth noting that in season 1, Mike begs his parents to let the party stay longer. The campaign took two weeks to plan! They need to finish it. He has no rush. While in all the other seasons (when he was late because of El), we get a "Shit! Shit! I'm going to be late"-version of Mike. He's stressed out and rushed. Not sure where I'm going with this last point, but I'm sure it means something and that it'll make sense in s5. The point is, Mike gets distracted by El.
Now for the monologue. This time, it's not Mike getting distracted by El. It's him distracting El.
Jason was obviously a key reason for them being too late as well. The scenes switch between Lucas fighting him and Mike’s monologue, comparing the two. Jason destroys Max’s walkman, destroying her connection to Lucas and the world outside her mind. Mike tries to get El to wake up by lifting her out of the freezer, taking off her glasses, Will shoves the radio away. They’re trying to get her out of Max’s mind and into the real world again. But El doesn't want to wake up. She is ready to fight for Max. The boys obviously tried to help because who knows what would’ve happened if they didn’t? They thought El was dying. When Mike begins his monologue, El looked away from Max and up “towards Mike’s voice”. She was listening to him now. Getting distracted. El continuously tells people throughout the series to be quiet when going into her “trance”. People talking distracts her, and she needs to concentrate. Mike also reminds the audience of the importance of the sensory deprivation tank. "It helps her calm down and focus on her powers". With Mike removing all the aids that help her concentrate (the glasses, the tank, the radio), while also talking to her, we can only assume that now, El isn’t only fighting to save Max, but also to stay in Max’s mind, further slowing her down.
At the end of the monologue, Mike reminds her she has to fight, and El’s eyes snap back to Max. That’s when she breaks loose from the vines. Whether you think El believes what Mike is saying and utilizes his loving words for strength or not, it’s still a distraction. I’ve seen a lot of people say that they felt impatient while watching this scene. Like «get on with it! Vecna is literally killing Max RIGHT NOW». And we're probably right to feel impatient! That's probably what the writers were going for! The audience was supposed to feel like that. El lost valuable time because of it. Mike is making them late this time too.
Will is also kinda to blame in this (I don't blame any of them, it's just an unfortunate set of events and they all did what they thought was best, but you get what I mean) Because in a way, Mike is distracted too. Distracted from the truth. That happened when Will lied to him in the van, disguising his own feelings for Mike, using El as a distraction for Mike to focus on instead. Will's guiding Mike towards a lie. He convinced Mike that El was feeling a certain way, which she WAS NOT. (For example: "You make her feel like she’s not a mistake at all, like she’s better for being different." cue Mike and El’s fight where she accuses him of thinking she’s a monster too, like everyone else.) (This also contrasts Will singling Mike out as the only person that doesn't treat him differently in season 2 in that scene with Will and Jonathan.) Mike doesn’t make El feel the way Will portrayed it in the van, though Mike is led to believe that she does.
Therefore, making the feelings that was the foundation for the monologue a lie. Both to Mike and El. It isn’t authentic. This doesn't apply to them. which brings me to my next point. 
 "A paladin swears to uphold justice and righteousness, to stand with the good things of the world against the encroaching darkness, and to hunt the forces of evil wherever they lurk. Different paladins focus on various aspects of the cause of righteousness (honesty=righteousness and honor for Mike), but all are bound by the oaths (promises, “friends don’t lie”) that grant them power to do their sacred work. Oaths, honor, and rigid rules define a paladin's everyday actions. Breaking these oaths (by lying) means their deity will revoke their powers."
This is why his monologue didn’t work. It was a lie (And Mike knowingly or unknowingly portrayed that lie to El). Without his honesty, Mike the paladin loses his powers. He couldn’t save them. 
Will’s selfless attempt to save their relationship sadly turned out to be counter-productive in every way, hindering all of them from seeing the truth. Will was also the one that told Mike not to stop, when in reality, maybe stopping and letting El be was exactly what he should've done. He's the heart. But he's Will's heart. That's what Will would've wanted Mike to do, seeing as Mike has saved him/snapped him out of his episodes multiple times by speaking to him: Of course Will thinks that's the right thing to do! Mike's doing what Will would've needed, not El.
It adds a new layer to El being upset with Mike in the cabin by the end of s4, because it isn't as simple as "she knows Mike is lying" or "She's just upset because they lost". She's upset because once again Mike doesn't trust that she knows her own limits (This being a huge reason for conflict in s3 between El/Mike/Max.) Mike worries because he cares of course, but it isn't what El needs ("Mike, I need you to trust me.") When Mike tries to help her, she fails. But she "redeems herself" when she's making her own decision, without outside influences other than love for her friends. She pushes her limits further than ever before, bringing Max back to life, trusting herself and her powers, without Mike knowing.
Mike is the heart, yes. The problem was - the heart was in the wrong place. They all got it wrong this time. They got confused and misunderstood each other. That’s why they lost. In the next season, I believe Mike and El are going to realize that they’ve both been focusing on the wrong things, and that is how they’re going to win. Still using love as their weapon - just a different kind of love that’s not distracting them from what they really need, not slowing them down. El coming fully into her own, reaching her full potential and using her powers the way she knows best, with the support of her loved ones making her stronger - not under the influence of Mike trying to stop her out of worry. And Mike’s heart being in the right place. With Will. 
I've seen other people talk about this next part, but I'm adding it in because it further proves the point.
Another indication that proves to me that at least SOME of the monologue is a blatant lie is the Romeo and Juliet parallel, with the word "Montague" spelled out behind Mike, and the "love at first sight"-refrence. "I knew right then and there, in that moment, that I loved you." That. is. a. lie. and there's just no going around it. Romeo and Juliet's romance wasn't actually real love, just infatuation. The Duffers also said they don't believe in love at first sight. For them to use that trope wouldn't just be wierd and cliché, but also contradicts everything we were shown in season 1. Are we just supposed to believe that Mike loved her, decpite them showing us otherwise?
More on the Romeo and Juliet thing in this post.
Conclusion: The Duffers are geniuses I’m never getting over this show.
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team7-headquarter · 5 months
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Team 7 introductions are like:
Naruto: I want to obtain POWER so I can force people to look at me like an actual human being and not a monster, haha! They won't ignore me or isolate me anymore! They're gonna BEG ME and put their lives on my hands and— Oh and ramen. All the ramen. And maybe prove to everyone that they are dumb ass fuck for not believing in me? Yeah, prove them wrong, that's cool! And and and Iruka-sensei is cool! I'm so happy when someone does the bare minimum and respects my life and acknowledges the fact that I'm just a kid and that I'm suffering (one of) the craziest discrimination acts applied by our government Hokage...
Sakura: you know how the first real goal I got like the first thing I wanted for myself after years of being bullied and being nobody and wanting to disappear was the affection of this boy? Well, all these other girls think I don't stand a chance and that they'll get the boy, so I'm gonna win the boy and laugh at their faces. Does it mean that I need validation and affection and attention and love? Not, what are you saying, I have a perfect normal life and parents that are totally involved in my life and I am happy! So happy! I wouldn't know what sadness or loneliness is like! Never! I'm normal and totally nothing to worry about!
Sasuke: you'll find that the things you like in life are meaningless when you carry the trauma of being the sole survivor of a genocide committed by the brother you loved and adored. I want him dead which shouldn't be surprising given that we live in a society ruled by violence, right? I hate a lot of things because I'm painfully aware of how miserable our reality is. Since this is my trauma, no one else has the right to do something about it. They certainly didn't seemto have the balls to go after him, even when they call him criminal, so I'm gonna kill Itachi myself. Obsessed you said? Try enjoying life when you know someone can commit genocide and no one would give a fuck and the government won't do a thing. Try caring for others knowing they can get kill any day and you'll have to look the other way. I dare you to.
Kakashi: *most emotionally neglected adult in the village, abandoned as a kid, saw his father do the right thing and get so socially pressured he ended up commiting suicide and the government didn't give a shit, forced to become a perfect weapon at young age to show off the village strength, forced to become an elite assassin as a kid, people in the village widely making fun of his trauma and acting like he's just weird / peculiar and not on the verge of losing his mind for real, a champ at dissociation and a minute more away taking roots in front of the graves of his mistakes because he spent way too much time there in self-punishment, basically the most miserable jounin in the whole village*
Kakashi: hm, I won't let you get to know me or get close to me because everything I touch dies and I don't want to get attachments because you're soldiers and you might die and it doesn't matter that I have history with two of your families and that you all remind every single minute of the boy I watched die and the girl that I killed and the boy used to be. You will never know any of that. I am a whole man with a whole life that you'll never know because I am just your superior here and you must obey me in our missions. I'm definitely not hiding the fact that the village just failed me and set me up to be the one who failed you all in case you get killed or lose your shit once and for all.
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ganseybois · 20 days
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tommy (at this point already casually dating buck) hanging out with eddie and calling him out on his feelings
alternatively eddie last minute helping maddie before the wedding and maddie calling him out on his feelings
or both
both? both. both is good :D i hope you enjoy it, it got a little long haha! if you want to send me a buddie prompt, click here!
Tommy is the first one to bring it up.
They're finishing up on the basketball court, and everyone has filed out by this point, leaving the two of them alone. Tommy is driving Eddie back anyhow, and today was an intense game, so they're taking their time.
Why Tommy chooses to bring it up before the car ride, Eddie doesn't know. But what a way to make it awkward.
"Hey, man I need to tell you something," he says as they return to the car. "So you're not blindsighted when it happens."
"Everything okay?" Eddie asks, clearly concerned.
"Well, not really." he lets out a tired laugh. "Uh...I'm going to be breaking up with Evan. I wanted to tell you so that, you know, you could do what you do and be there for him."
Shocked, Eddie steps in front of Tommy, "Wait, what? I thought things were going great with the two of you." he feels his gut twist uncomfortably - the last thing Eddie wants in the whole world is to see Buck hurt again. "Tommy, come on, Buck is great. He's amazing. There's not a thing about him to not like."
Tommy scoffs, "Believe me, Eddie, I know that."
"So then what's wrong?"
"Eddie, seriously?" Tommy rolls his eyes. "I can't keep dating him and ignore...whatever it is you two have going on. I like Buck, a lot, I do but, there is clearly something between the two of you."
Eddie lets out a small laugh of disbelief. "Tommy," he says, grinning, trying to find his footing in this conversation. The rug has been swept out from under him. Him? And Buck? No way. "He's my best friend. That's all."
"You know Eddie," Tommy rolls his eyes, walking past him now. "I know everyone is a bit of an idiot with love, but you're acting obtuse purposely."
Eddie turns around and follows, "Hey," he snaps. "I'm sorry if we're too close for you to handle, but I'm not going to apologize for being his best friend."
"I don't want you to Eddie, really, I don't. But you should both take your head out of your asses so that you can stop hurting other people." 
That stops Eddie from making a retort. 
Tommy picks up his pace as he walks over to unlock his door, as though he can escape Eddie and erase the fact that he is also driving Eddie home. That they are going to have to share a space for twenty minutes before Eddie can leave and be alone, and send Tommy on his way to break his best friend’s heart. 
Does Eddie love Buck? 
Of course. 
Buck is his best friend. Why wouldn’t he love him? How could he not? Buck is beautiful, and kind, takes care of his son, and has been there for Eddie since the day that they met. Buck is honest and hopeful, Buck is tender and funny, he is knowledgeable and earnest. He’s the best friend anyone could ever ask for. Eddie knows all this, and of course he loves him for it. 
But that doesn’t mean he’s in love with him…does it?
***
“Thank you so much for helping me Eddie,” Maddie sighs as they walk into her house, Eddie with boxes stacked in his arms. He doesn’t even know what’s inside them - Maddie needed help, so he agreed. 
“Sure thing,” he kicks the door shut and follows her to the kitchen, gently laying the boxes on the table. “Here’s okay?”
“Perfect,” she rubs his back. “Want some coffee? You’re welcome to stay for a while.”
“Coffee sounds great, thanks,” Eddie nods, watching her move around her kitchen. He feels a little awkward–he likes Maddie just fine, but really, he hasn’t spent too much time with her, so he isn’t sure where to strike conversation. They already spent an hour talking about kids in his truck, he feels like he’s used Christopher enough. 
“So,” she says, tone careful and light, prepping mugs. “Did Buck tell you about Tommy?” 
“Yeah, he did.” Eddie murmurs, Tommy and Buck broke up three days ago. Eddie listened to Buck tell the story, and hugged him tight. He gave him beer, ordered him food, and let Buck stay over for the night so he wouldn’t have to be alone. 
At least you’re always going to be here, Eddie, right?
Nowhere else I’d rather be, Buck. 
Eddie broke up with Marisol a day later. He has tried not to think too hard about why that is but…he has spent the last three days thinking about what Tommy has said. 
Eddie clears his throat. “It sucks, I thought this would work out for Buck for sure.”
Maddie sighs sadly, starting to prepare the coffee for them, before she turns around and gazes at him fondly. “I already knew it wouldn’t.” When Eddie just continues to look at her, she rolls her eyes and smiles. “Eddie, come on.”
“What?” he asks. 
“Seriously? You’re going to make me spell it out for you?”
He feels his heart skip a beat, understanding dawning on him. “Maddie,” he shakes his head with a small laugh, although what he wants is to run in the other fucking direction. “Listen-”
“All I do is listen, Eddie. I listen to my brother talk about you like you hung the sun in the sky. I listen to him complain when he can’t see you and Chris. I listen to him talk about everything you do for him, everything you say to him.”
“He’s my best friend,” Eddie says, feeling cornered. 
“I know that I really do. And maybe I’m wrong, maybe I don’t know you as well as I think I do but…I know my brother. It could have never worked with Tommy, because he was too busy being in love with you.”
“Maddie-”
“Hey, maybe I’m wrong,” she says, pouring their coffee. Why do these things never happen when he’s about to leave? “But look into his eyes Eddie, and you’ll see it. Promise me.”
Eddie doesn’t know what to do. 
A little part of him admits that he’s afraid to look. Afraid of what he’ll find. 
“Maddie,” he says softly. “He’s my best friend.”
“Eddie.” she sighs. “You look at Buck the way I look at Chimney. The way Karen looks at Hen. The way Bobby looks at Athena. This is so far beyond what you think it is. Promise me you’ll think about it.”
“I promise.”
***
Eddie thinks about it all the way to Buck’s house. 
He thinks about his life, about what makes sense, about his son, and what makes sense in his son’s life. He thinks about the obvious - is he happier when Buck is around? Yes. Did he like Marisol? Not really. Was that because of Buck? He doesn’t know. 
Does he miss Buck when he’s not there? Yes. 
Does he think Buck makes him a better person? Yes. 
Does he love Buck? Yes. 
Yes. 
Yes. 
He makes it to Buck’s apartment and knocks on the door. It opens a moment later. 
Look into his eyes, Eddie. 
Eddie looks. 
Buck smiles, bright as a thousand suns. Just because Eddie thought to come over, to just spend time with him. 
Buck’s eyes sparkle – there is love there, warmth, undying devotion.  
Eddie, finally, can see.  
“Can I come in?” Eddie asks. 
Buck steps aside, and Eddie takes the first step into the rest of his life.
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kimbap-r0ll · 1 year
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Adult trio (seperately )and their reaction to female reader accepting their love confession ?
Fluff
Thank you for the ask! This one's gonna be a bit interesting, considering how these characters are not the type to confess their love in my opinion. It's not that fluffy, but I hope you enjoy!
Adult Trio react to their fem!s/o accepting their love confession
Hisoka
His version of a love confession is likely a death match, so I wouldn't really say that accepting it would be the best option?
This is unless he just wants to spend time with you as a more common form of a relationship. In that case, he may be a bit more solemn about the whole thing and say something along the lines of "I think I'm in love, whatever that is."
If you accept to his death match, expect it to happen either a) right away or b) as soon as possible. But, if you accept his more chill love confession, you might see him smile a bit to himself before muttering a quick "how delightful."
It's shockingly calm if it's normal. He's sort of like how he was when he was talking to Illumi on the blimp in the 13th Chairman Election Arc. It's probably the softest you'll see him
Illumi
He doesn't confess, honestly if he were to say he loves you he expects you to say you do as well
But, if you two weren't arranged by his parents and somehow got close to each other, he might just be upfront and tell you that you shouldn't exist because it's making him not be the perfect assassin. You're making his heart skip, making him less focused, etc.
If you accept his love confession and tell him that it's okay to feel that way, it might take him a while to get used to it. Know that it does feel nice to have someone love him though
But if you two were arranged, I'm not sure how he would feel. He would say "Of course you accepted, there wouldn't be any other possibility." It's a bit mechanic
Chrollo
Probably the only one who can make a genuine love confession without it endangering your life. HOWEVER! He could pretend to give you a genuine confession just to get something from you.
In that case, if you accept, he'll be polite and kiss you lightly on the cheek, thanking you for accepting his feelings. Not sure what would happen afterwards. If it works better to kill you off, then he may do so.
If Chrollo gives you a genuine love confession though, it's a lot more somber. He might almost tear up with how he acts, but you can tell it's genuine with how much of his usual calm demeanor sort of...disappears. He'll tell you he feels as though he can't live without you, etc.
If you accept his confession here, he will try to compose himself, but his younger, more bright self might show a bit and you may get a surprise hug from the boss (manga readers you know what I mean haha)
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adastrael · 1 year
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Cod: mw ii characters as type of kisses (pt.3)
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Pairing(s): gender neutral reader / könig, kim "horangi" hong-jin, alex keller, farah karim
Word Count: 2.7k
Warnings: mentions of canon typical violence, talk about anxiety and insecurities
A/N: the last part is finally here! I know most of these guys aren't technically mw2 characters, but I couldn't just leave them out of the fun haha! On another hand, I'm sorry if this seems more rushed than the previous ones, I haven't had the chance to get to know these characters as well as the others yet. Anyhow, thank you for all the love on this series, it means a lot to me! :)
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König - "breathy kiss"
One of your favorite things was to share kisses with him. He was always so responsive to your touch, whole body reacting to every slight brush of your skin on his. It felt like he was comfortable enough to show you how he truly felt through them, not even trying to find a way to deny his love. It never failed to drive you crazy in the best way.
If there was someone easy to fluster, it was definitely König. Those times he happened to be confident were limited to when he was out in the field, so during the time you two spent alone together, it wasn't difficult to make him bashful. You tried not to take advantage of his reactions and contain the giddiness you felt when he got into such a state, but it was a feat; he always looked adorable tripping over his words, cheeks a nice shade of red and hands fidgeting as he tried to come up with an answer to you. You couldn't get enough of his shyness, but you made sure to never cross any lines and boundaries you two set up. Sure, messing with him was entertaining, but the most important thing was to never make him truly uncomfortable or upset. Not to mention, you could spend time with him without trying to make him crumble with cheeky words, and have just as a great time — if not even better.
A regular Friday forenoon, the weather was perfect for taking a stroll and visiting the markets nearby your house. There were a few things that needed to be replaced anyways, so you had a good reason to go out, besides the fact that you wanted to enjoy the Sun on your skin of course. Since your boyfriend was back home from his latest deployment, it was natural you wanted to ask him to accompany you. Any chance you had, you wanted to take and spend time with him, especially since he was away from home a lot. However, there was one little problem with that: the company of strangers put him into a heavily uneasy state.
It wasn't correct to say he was terrible with crowds; König always swore he was, but you knew he handled himself just fine. Of course you knew how bad his anxiety spiked when put into situations like that, but from the outside he usually looked like he didn't have a problem in the world — you always made sure to let him know how well he did every time you two went out, no matter what situation he had to ease into. You knew it was difficult for him to read and react to social situations, but he tried his best and you were more than grateful and proud of him. The longer you were in a relationship together, the more often he joined you for outdoor activities, and it made you extremely happy to see him make an effort to become better. And flattered for sure, knowing he wanted to get better at this for your benefit.
So, with the knowledge that he wouldn't say no to you this time either, especially since this would be a short and easy trip, you went to talk to him.
Quickly finding König in your shared bedroom, you softly knocked on the door to get his attention.
"Hey König?"
"Ja?"
"Would you come along with me to the market today?"
Sitting on the king sized bed in his worn out comfortable clothes, he looked so much smaller, no matter the fact that he was a 6 feet something giant of a man. As he started to fidget with his hands a little, gaze directed to the sheets under him, it was hard to resist the urge to join him on the beddings and caress his knuckles to reassure him.
"How far are we going?"
"Just to the end of the street, I only want to visit Dominik's and then Sophia's on the way back."
You knew it was important for him to know exactly where you would be going and who you had to meet, because it helped him prepare mentally in advance. It wasn't a bother to share your exact plans with him in any way, and it made him feel better, so you were always happy to make sure to share the needed information.
After a few seconds of him considering it, pointedly looking anywhere but you, you received a little nod from him.
"Okay."
In your defense, he looked too irresistible sitting there all shy, you just couldn't help yourself; flashing him a bright smile, you skipped over to the bed, gently cupping his face in your hands.
"Thank you. I promise I will be quick."
Leaning in, you intended to give him a chaste kiss, just something to show your gratitude besides words. König seemed to have other plans however: pushing his lips onto yours a little more firmly, he sighed through his nose and made a little sound in the back of his throat. He was usually clumsy when it came to kissing, but this time he seemed to get the handle of things. Pulling back only a few millimeters, gasping for air, then diving back to connect your lips together, his body was slowly melting under your touch, the previous uneasiness leaving him. You loved when he got passionate like this; anxiety absent from his mind, body shivering where your hands wandered, harsh breaths leaving his mouth as he poured his emotions into the kiss. You knew this was a way for him to let all the worries go, to show you how genuinely he felt, and it never failed to make your head fuzzy and heart warm with fondness.
Truly, you could have stayed like that, interwined with him forever, but unfortunately there were still things to do. So, with a gentle hand on his cheek, you managed to pull away. Gazing into his eyes and softly stroking his heated face, König was almost panting into your embrace, quick breaths leaving his mouth and a dazed expression on his face. He really was a beautiful sight to see.
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Kim "Horangi" Hong-jin - "hesitant kiss"
He was confident in every sense of the word. His cocky, sometimes too narcissistic attitude should have been annoying, but it looked good on him, fitting if you got to know him. You never noticed a thing he did without his usual courage, not up until you two got into a relationship. Funnily, he wasn't such an egotistical man when it came to showing affection.
Finally finding the motivation to get up from your place on the couch, you popped your joints after sitting for so long. The TV show you've been watching just ended for the night, and as much as you would have loved to stay in a lying position, you still had to shower and get to your actual bed to sleep. It was better to avoid back pain after all.
"Where are you going?"
Looking down at the voice, your boyfriend was blinking bearly at you from between the pillows, clearly having just woken up. He always offered to keep you company while you watched your shows, even when he himself wasn't interested, but that sometimes resulted in this; him sleeping peacefully next to you, tucked under the blankets and pillows. You didn't mind too much to be fair: he was quiet when asleep, the opposite of what he was like when awake. You didn't mean it in a bad way of course, he just had a habit of commenting on whatever you were watching, often making you slightly irritated. Lucky for him that he was good at making it up to you, so it was hard to stay mad at him for long.
"Taking a shower."
"Come back."
You almost laughed at the way he reached his arm out towards you, then let it uselessly flop back onto the couch. You barely understood what he was mumbling, but you had the routine of these nights to help.
"Sorry baby."
"Why not?"
"We can sleep in our bedroom, you know?"
"Please?"
It was rare he begged, so taking pity on his pouting form, you sighed and turned your body back towards him.
"Fine. But what do I get?"
"Come here."
Plopping yourself down into his open arms, Horangi leaned up with the intention of kissing you. Before you could appreciate his affection though, he stopped suddenly, just barely before your lips could have met in the middle. His body went still under you, eyes more awake and blinking uncertainty up at you.
"It's okay, go ahead."
At your soft encouragement, he seemed to come back to himself. Blinking a few times he moved, finally cutting the distance between your lips short.
You knew he was insecure about the scars adorning his face, as much as he tried to hide it. Horangi always acted confident, no matter what he did or who he was with, but when it came to showing you who he really was, sometimes he seemed to shrink into himself and try to hide. You weren't giving up however; he's been doing much better with showing his love openly for you and not letting his insecurities get in the way of his actions, so you were proud of him for trying. You knew it wouldn't get solved from one day to another, but he has already given you much to love and believe. It was only a matter of time before he was his usual self-assured self when it came to kissing you too.
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Alex Keller - "passionate kiss"
Any chance he got, he managed to make physical contact with you, one way or another. A hand on the small of your back, an arm across your stomach, forehead resting on your shoulder; you name it and he has done it before. This might have been because of the fact that he spent a lot of time away from home, but physical touch was simply just his love language really. Besides, you didn't mind how touchy he was, enjoying the closeness just as much as he did.
Thankful for the previously cut up vegetables on the wooden board, you turned just in time to catch your boyfriend entering the house. Closing the front door behind him, Alex looked a little rugged; he's been mowing and watering the lawn all morning, so it wasn't anything you haven't expected. Still, the sight made you shake your head with a fond smile, directing him to the bathroom upstairs for a cleanup before he even considered touching and dirtying you. He complied easily enough after some good-natured banter, promising to come back down clean a few minutes later.
Just as you were ready to put every ingredient into the pot placed on the stove, two strong arms wound themselves around your middle, pulling you into a solid chest behind you. As kisses found their way onto your neck, you couldn't help but laugh at the feeling of a mustache tickling your sensitive skin.
"Alex! Come on, you know that tickles!"
"But I'm clean now, so it's free game!"
"No please."
Slightly pulling away while giggling, you turned in his hold and laced your arms around his neck.
"You might be clean, but I have a soup to cook. If you distract me, lunch won't be ready anytime soon."
"Would that be such a bad thing?"
At his cheeky reply, you let one of your hands hit his chest gently, shaking your head at him. You couldn't deny how happy you were however, a smile ever-present on your face.
"It would. Now, let me work please."
"Just give me a minute."
Before you could reply, his left hand came up to hold your face tenderly. Leaning down, Alex kissed you, silencing whatever protest was on your mind at that moment.
Humming into his mouth, you reciprocated immediately, not caring too much about the food behind you anymore. As you deepened the kiss, enjoying the feeling of your lips on his, you let more of your body weight rest against him, making his hold tighten slightly. His other hand soon sneaked up from your waist, grasping into your hair lightly. He made sure not to pull and hurt you in any way, he was just anchoring you to himself even closer — more securely. It was a habit of his you learned to love very quickly, and he wasn't one to bother hiding how much he enjoyed it every time either.
After a few minutes have passed locked together like that, you finally pulled away and put some distance between the two of you.
"Don't think I will let you get away with this."
"I wouldn't dream of it."
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Farah Karim - "forehead kiss"
Constantly fighting wasn't an easy thing, not for the body nor the soul. After days, weeks of being on the field and putting up with everything happening around you, it wasn't a surprise when relaxing and letting go became difficult to anyone who has experienced it. For her, it seemed especially hard, but with your help, she found there was a way to calm the storm inside her.
Your girlfriend wasn't big on showing signs of affection in public and you didn't blame her for that in the slightest. As a Commander and highly respected soldier, Farah had a front and reputation to uphold, and there wasn't really a place for being openly emotional. That didn't mean she didn't love you, and you always got reassured by the little things she did for you — waving when leaving from base, giving you a subtle nod to let you know something, sending you a little smile in a private way. It was hard to stay loving and affectionate when operating a whole Force, and you understood it enough to not demand anything she couldn't give or do.
Routinely, when Farah finally came home after a long period of time, it took her a few days to ease back into a calm state. She was always level-headed, out in the field or in everyday life, but all the fighting took a mental toll on her. She didn't like to let you know when she was doing bad or just had a difficult time getting used to the quiet and calm of home, but you always noticed anyways. It wasn't hard: when you know someone as deeply as you two knew each other, it was nearly impossible to miss signs like those. Fortunately, you had a good way of helping her, one that didn't require more than a little patience and your love.
"Love?"
You stepped into the bedroom while calling out for your girlfriend, putting a mug on the nightstand.
"I'm here."
Feeling her presence behind you, you turned and greeted her with a smile.
"Can I read to you?"
It was usual for you two to end up under the soft covers tangled up together, but free just enough to read one-one book by yourselves. It wasn't unheard of either that one of you offered to read aloud, because both of you found it calming and a good way to spend time effectively together. Now, Farah had a slight frown on her face, visibly considering your offer. Her stance was still stiff, gaze often darting back and forth in any room she stepped in. You understood of course; she was barely back from a long mission, it was tough to get back to your usual routine. After a few seconds though, her expression softened and with a nod, she closed the door behind her.
Turning around, you made quick work of the sheets and pillows, laying down in a way your back was still propped up onto the bed frame. Grasping a book you were half finished with, you opened your arms in an open invitation.
"Come here."
It didn't take long until you were both comfortably under the blankets, legs interviewed and her head on your shoulder. The room was quiet except for your soft words, and within minutes, Farah was breathing steady next to you, body finally relaxing.
It went like that for some time, and when you went to turn the page and start a new chapter, her voice stopped you.
"Thank you."
Untangling herself a little, she pulled herself up and gently kissed your forehead. It was unhurried and entirely chaste, just like her kisses usually were; in this form, they meant more than anything else in her book, and by default, in yours too. Sensing how grateful she was, you gave her a warm smile, and with a gentle hand on her back, you directed your attention back to the book in your other. It wasn't long before she was snoring softly against you, quiet breaths rhythmically hitting your chest.
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rimouskis · 6 months
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could you explain more about what you view as the before era and what you view as the after? i need to learn my herstory
I think this requires a more detailed and educated/researched answer than I can give after an exhausting workday and an after-hours work event, but I'm going to do my best and also open up the floor in reblogs for people to chip in their thoughts
foremost: a DISCLAIMER that this post does not aim to shit on writers from the "before" era. there are many classic fics that I love and enjoy, even if I consider their characterizations to be "less accurate"* than the ones we have in the after era.
*aside to say: accuracy is based only off of literal media accounts we have of these men; we do not know them, we should not claim to know them, and they have had different comfort levels with the media knowing selective truths about their lives [sid out of choice, geno out of media xenophobia] than they did when these early fics were being written.
"before" fics (which I tend to refer to as "classic" fics, and had their heyday in 2012-2013 but continued up until 2016ish) tended to have more regimented roles for sid and geno. sid was usually the protagonist; geno was the love interest.
this came with a cascading set of characteristics assigned to each guy. sid was poor-little-meow-meow'd. geno was the pursuer in the relationship. sid usually bottomed. sid had the whole spacetoaster moment (he was the inspiration for the term, haha). there wasn't much a/b/o fic but sid was, like, the omega-fied one and geno was alpha-ized.
something I've been thinking about more recently is how 2012-2013 era sidgeno displayed signs of Migratory Slash Fandom. I don't think of MSF as an inherently negative/condemning thing, but I think it's a phenomenon that deserves to be mentioned/analyzed, yeah?
MSF thrives on big character differences.... like, grumpy/sunshine, sarcastic/broody, genius/empath. it's all about emphasizing disparate archetypes to create natural tension in a story. this works really well in most romance novels! I love it!
the issues arise when people try to make characters fit into these preset dynamics. and, frankly, when sidgeno first got big, we straight-up didn't know as much about sid and geno. I mean that. despite sid being EXTENSIVELY covered by media from age, like, 14, he was really tight-lipped compared to what we have now.
and geno was.... there. I don't mean that as a diss—he was INCREDIBLE, but the media totally passed him over again and again. or they helped contribute to stereotypes of him being a dumb oaf who didn't know english.
aside: ironically I think that helped in creating sidgeno and not, like.... sidflower or sidtanger. geno was so "DIFFERENT" from sid (aka: russian, characterized by media as not knowing how to speak [in comparison to sid's highly curated media soundbites]) that it meant he was the best candidate for A Ship with sid.
a lot of the really big writers who got into sidgeno were fandom veterans with lots of experience in other big fandoms. to me, that means MSF had a hand in all this. and we should be grateful, because it led to the BOOM of hockey fic, and of sidgeno fic specifically. modern hrpf wouldn't exist without it.
that being said, those template ship dynamics, plus the media's attitude then towards sid and geno in its coverage, led to those characterizations of whiny soft sensitive boy sid who needed to be rescued even though he was the best hockey player EVER, and geno as the lumbering tall strong alpha not-that-bright Love Interest Man.
this isn't to say every fic was this way, or that this is BAD. I, uh, love poor-little-meow-meow-ing sid and omegafying the hell out of him. what I'm saying is that it was a near-ubiquitous characterization across the board.
that all changed in 2016-2018. I personally wholly credit sevenfists, though I imagine it's more nuanced than that, but: my blog, I make the rules here. I don't know if sevenfists was psychic or just highly observant and absolutely excellent at reading people (and that's basically the same thing, right?), but characterization shifts began taking place in fic....
and the coolest thing happened, in that those characterizations were seemingly reinforced by more media coverage. the back to back cups brought with them TONS of interviews with and media about the team, and sid and geno in particular. the coolest part of it was that sid had loosened up a LOT and geno had gotten more comfortable (and had gotten a reporter firmly on his side).
the interviews about sid post 2016 were just SO different. so much information started coming out, and a LOT of it conflicted with Ye Olde Characterizations. as it turned out, sid was deeply one of the boys. he was funny. everyone liked him. he loved hosting. he was insanely comfortable around almost everyone, including strangers, because he's a little freak who's kind to everyone. he can make smalltalk like no one's business. he's kind of gross. he likes to giggle and be in on jokes and get into the thick of it. he isn't some blushing virgin bride sold off of mario's doorstep, yeah?
and geno, too, was finally getting the coverage he deserved. and his personality was both fortified by age and better shown to us through media. as it turns out, he isn't some happy go lucky oaf. he's mercurial and intensely aware of what others think of him (and he CARES). he's sensitive and thoughtful but also can lash out at random times. he has a wicked sense of humor that he uses as a defense mechanism and as a surefire way to get people to like him, which matters to him. and, as everyone says, he is SMART.
if you had to boil it down, I'd say that post-2016, it became clear that SID is the confident one and GENO is the insecure one. and fic caught onto that with a miraculously fast pace. also: they're more alike than they are different, but I still think romance inherently feeds off of difference and tension, so we still exaggerate things to make the stories ✨WORK✨.
I'm not going to give examples of pre- and post- era fics, because I don't want to point any fingers and say someone was doing characterization "wrong." that's not the takeaway I want anyone to have here.
fandom attitudes have changed. it's been 10 years since that first wave of fics, and while I don't think that's very long, it's a hell of a long time on the internet, and in a niche internet community. what was once the standard for fics (and what was well-read, and what people gravitated towards) was different. not worse—different.
I think it's fair to say the "after" era of fics is more "accurate" to what we know of sid and geno. it's also fair to say that this is only the case because we have a WEALTH of information, character-revealing interviews and videos and anecdotes, that Ye Old Authors could only dream of getting.
I really love the story of how everything has changed, and it's a fabulous microcosm of fandom evolution and how approaches to fanworks have changed and grown with fandom, and I think it's all so so cool.
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