Si belle en toute intimité
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Undoing.
At first glance, he wasn’t anything spectacular. He was ordinary looking, would probably pass in a crowd with no one taking a double look at him. Her friends told her he really just looked like any other dude there was out there, but there were some things about him that held her eye indefinitely.
She wasn’t the type to gravitate towards a man by the size of his muscles, or altitude-suffocating height, or even by any particular sense of style.
What stood out to her about him were his eyes.
Eyes that held intimate truths. Eyes that, when they looked her way, could slow down the earth’s rotation without even trying. Those deep steel blue eyes had a sadness to them that one couldn’t quite understand. They were tainted with an anomalous melancholy that one could feel just from looking at them briefly. Eyes that spoke so much, whispered, screamed without him even opening his mouth. Eyes she could get lost in for eternities, had she had the time.
And then there was his smile. That sort of lopsided, awkward show of perfectly lined teeth tethering between a grin and a smirk that was more taunting than inviting. A smile that could hold her on the edge of her seat, or put her to her knees if he so chose. To most, he didn’t appear to be the authoritative type ; he normally refused to be placed above his peers. But to her, he was the moon to her vacillating tides. He seemed to know precisely the effects his gravity had on her, and he used it to his full advantage. She knew resisting the temptation would prove itself futile, as she tried to have done so many times, without avail. His presence was a test ; a challenge, beckoning her closer, demanding she opens herself to him.
He wasn’t just her safe space ; he was her undoing. He was the one who saw her when she felt invisible to the people she loved most. His arms cradled her tired, sobbing body as she lost herself to her tempestuous sea of thoughts time and time again. He called her beautiful, and meant it, when she felt her most repulsive. He was an unwavering, supportive presence when she couldn’t be there for herself. He showed up. He showed up in ways her kin failed to do consistently. He quieted her nights, and inhibited her dreams. He never made her feel like her presence, being or spirit were ever too much, as she so deserved.
All of that in it of itself, has its merit. He’s proved countlessly how able he was not only to handle her, but to take in her entire being effortlessly. To see her soul completely bared and stepping back only to admire its wholeness. To sit with her in her darkness and offering to be the stars to her endless skies. To offer not only shelter from her own storms, but solace and reprieve as his love was a hearth to her empty lighthouse. He didn’t save her, and he certainly did not fix her, but he saw her for what she was, and he loved every part of her for it.
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Intimité en fil de laçage, 2015
Photo by Michel Verna
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