#incorrect obey me quotes

[sheeprad]

[Beelzebub while Mc is on earth]

Satan: Hey, Beel

Beel: Mc used to call me that…

Satan:

Satan: Because that’s your fucking name.

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[mammons-lover]

Satan: Mammon today you have the perfect opportunity to become the ✨Best✨ Brother in world.

Mammon: Alright, whatcha want be to do?

Satan: I want you to come with me in on a heist to steal Diavolo's forbidden spell book.

Mammon: you had be at steal, what’s the plan?!

Satan: And see this is why I like you… sometime. Alright so we’re gonna…

Mammon (I’m his mind): Sometimes…Should I feel insulted?

Satan: MAMMON PAY ATTENTION!!

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[fluffimemes]

Leviathan, acting tough: You guys don't want to mess with me.

MC: Yeah, Levi will straight-up cry in public. Don't try him!

Leviathan: Exactly, I will straight up-

Leviathan:

Leviathan, tearing up: MC, why would you say that?!

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[equestriagirl16]

MC: *chillin in Purgatory Hall after dealing with some of the brothers’ bs*

MC: *sigh* Guys are so dumb, promise me you’ll never be one when you grow up Luke.

Luke: *just tryin to decorate some cupcakes* I’ll..try?

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[the-ghost-0f-t0m0]

MC: I wish I had the ability to make boys really nervous

Thirteen: Holding a really sharp knife to their neck usually does the trick for me

Solomon: As a boy I can confirm that this makes me really nervous

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[morningstaravatar]

MC, shopping downtown: I swear I get the feeling I’m being followed today.

*Walks past Simeon and Luke who’s watching behind newspapers with shades*

*Doesn’t see Lucifer or Mammon walking around in suspicious looking jackets in store*

*Fails to notice Diavolo and Barbatos wearing fedoras as both hide behind a tree*

*Walks around Beel and Belphie who pretend to be in disguises sleep next to them on the bench*

*Doesn’t see Asmo, Satan or Levi watching In a car that’s circled the block three times*

*Trips over something near Solomon who doesn’t even bother with a disguise*

MC: Nahhh. it’s probably just me. :)

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[incorrect-quotes-4-u]

Obey Me Quote#2

Mammon: *nudges MC at 3am* Pretty fucked up that we depict the moon as a girl and the sun as a boy. They're just floating rocks in space. MC? Wake up, MC! Listen! They're sexless! MC: The sun isn't a rock, go back to sleep.

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[nex-ture]

Obey Me as things people have said in Discord

Asmodeus: I thought that was a fleshlight..

Satan: That looks nothing like a flashlight.

Asmodeus: I said flesh

Satan: What's a fleshlight

Satan: oh

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[moodyhaaze]

Solomon: Would you stab your best friend in the leg for 10 million Grimm?

Mammon: You stab me, and then when my leg gets better, we buy a big-ass house.

MC: You can stab me too, then we'll have 20 million.

Mammon: Good thinking.

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[piercedddriver]

*at ristoranté six*

Solomon: I put poison in one of our drinks.

Lucifer: ...

Solomon: But I forgot which one it was.

Lucifer: With the way this dinner is going I hope it's mine.

@l3viat8an

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[slutifer]

mc is waiting to go into the bathroom cuz mammon is taking a LONG pee

mc: *hears him peeing* you frying chicken in there bro? damn

mc: BEEL NO

mammon: AHHHHHHHHHH

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[sheeprad]

Satan, first day as a vet: What’s the problem?

Cat: meow

Satan: Yes but where?

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[fanficsat12am]

Simeon: MC HELP!

MC: WHO DID WHAT THIS TIME

Simeon: SOMEONE'S STUCK IN MY PHONE AND THEY KNOW MY NAME

Phone: Hello! I am your Google Assistant, how may I help?

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[fluffimemes]

Asmodeus, in disbelief: I can't believe you've done this...

MC: I'm sorry I didn't know!

Asmodeus, on the verge of tears: YOU CAN'T JUST BUY ME A GIFT OUT OF NOWHERE! NOW I FEEL LIKE A HUGE ASSHOLE!

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[hopefully-helpful-daemon]

Satan: Thought I was meowing back at my cat for the past hour, but it was just me and Mammon meowing at each other from different rooms in the house.

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[rasazys-ramblings]

MC: Ducks are better than rabbits.

Asmodeus: What? Rabbits are adorable. Have you ever been in a fight with a duck? Ducks are jerks.

Beelzebub: Duck is delicious! Rabbit is all gamey.

Asmodeus: We’re not talking about flavor, Beel!

Beelzebub: Flavour counts!

Asmodeus: Who carries around a duck’s foot for good luck? Anyone?

Leviathan: You wrap yourself in a comforter stuffed with rabbit hair. I’ll wrap myself in a comforter stuffed with duck feathers! Who’s cozier?

Asmodeus: Okay, but-

Leviathan: NO, NO, NO, NO. WHO’S COZIER?

Satan: Then why don’t we take a rabbit, a duck, stick them in a cardboard box, and let them fight it out??

Asmodeus: BECAUSE IT’S ILLEGAL, SATAN!

Satan: ONLY IF WE BET ON IT, ASMO!

MC: I- Jeez-

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