#im gonna think of another huge one i forgot right after i post this i know it

[demadogs]

am i the only one that doesn’t have hope anymore? like at all? i don’t trust the duffers anymore and i feel like us(the bylers) created all this byler thing in our heads and we just looked too much into the details in the show :(

i dont blame you for not having hope bc volume 2 for byler definitely was a disappointment and i understand not wanting to look between the lines of the monologue and get hopes up only to be disappointed again but DO NOT think we just made all this up!! if byler doesnt happen i genuinely think that it was their plan originally and then they trashed it.

its not like theres two or three potential hints towards it. there are dozens and dozens of clues and subtext from the dialogue and actions of the characters but also the cinematography, the lighting, the score and tracks they use, the parallels to other couples on the show, the placement of their characters, and probably so much more we havent even noticed yet. we did not make anything up.

after volume 2 i wasnt that sad or mad because more than anything i was just VERY confused. because none of mike wheelers actions make sense unless hes deeply struggling with internalized homophobia. there will be genuine plotholes in the whole show if they stick with mlvn til the end.

lets look at mikes actions alone. can you answer ANY of these questions with an answer thats NOT related to his sexuality?

why did mike not let el touch her when they were kissing at the beginning of s3?

why did he say “its not my fault you dont like girls” if thats not projecting?

why did he say he loves her out loud to everyone else but then pretend he didnt know what she was talking about when she brought it up again?

why did he look so confused when el kissed him and said she loves him and why did he keep his eyes open and didnt kiss her back at all?

why didnt mike have any indication of even having a gf in his room besides the letter we saw him read, while el had a whole shrine and a “book of letters” from him? why did, instead, mike have wills drawings up all over the basement and has a while binder for them that we saw in s1. book of drawings.

WHY on earth wouldnt mike hug his best friend who he hasnt seen in months at the airport? its not because he knows wills feelings, the duffers and finn and the script itself have confirmed hes oblivious to his sexuality and feelings for him.

why did mike look so nervous to ask will about the painting? if it was just because their friendship was kinda dying i think he would have said it as if he was bored or didnt care but instead he looked like he cared a little too much and was trying to hide it. this is right after reading el’s letter that said that will might be painting for a girl.

why did mike barely even look at el as they were walking out of the airport and why did he wear something very different for mike as if he’s portraying someone he’s not?

why would mike emphasize so much “WE’RE FRIENDS!!! we’re friends!” will didnt mean it in a romantic context but mike took it that way.

why was mike kinda an asshole to el and didnt comfort her after the bullies at the rink? “she didnt look fine?” what the hell.

WHY COULDNT MIKE SAY OR WRITE THAT HE LOVES EL!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT IS THE POINT OF THAT SCENE IF HE ACTUALLY GENUINELY DOES LOVE HER??? why didnt he say it right then if he did?

why was that “i feel like i lost you” scene so god damn flirty? he’s never looked at el the way he looked at him here.

why did he nod when will told him that its scary to open up to people especially if they dont like the truth? why did finn say that this “psyches him out”?

why did mike say “its not fate, its not destiny, its just simple dumb luck” about first meeting el and then claim to her that the moment he say her in the woods was love at first sight? we know that this is a blatant lie and will should know this too.

why did mike look at will like THAT during the painting scene!!!??? (i will admit tho this could be finn wolfhard just wanting his character to be gay so he plays him gay but they could have used shots of him not looking at his lips but they kept them in.)

WHY DID WILL HAVE TO PUSH MIKE TO CONTINUE TALKING TO EL!!!!!???? HE WASNT GONNA SAY HE LOVES HER BUT WILL PUSHED HIM INTO IT!!!!!!!!

and thats just his actions alone!!! now lets look into the more technical film choices theyve made when it comes to mike wheeler. again, can you answer any of these questions with an answer thats not related to him having internalized homophobia?

why did they make it clear that max and lucas at day of the dead were having a date (“im spending romantic time with my girlfriend”) and then choose to place mike and will together but not with them, as if mike and will were on a date too.

why did they film mike and el’s break up in s3 so playfully and humorous with bright lighting, lots of colors, an audience, max and el laughing, and fun music after vs mike and will’s fight which was very dark and blue, pouring rain, harsh shadows, and played an emotional original score track?

WHY the eye witness parallel?

why would they frame mike in a closet in s3 during that awkward unreciprocated kiss? this is the biggest thing by far for me that makes me think he’s gay for sure.

why did they frame mike reading el’s letter so that theres a literal fucking one way sign pointing to an open closet?

why did bouncy upbeat music play when he and el reunited at the airport? they could have made it emotional but they made it light and playful as if its more friendly than romantic.

WHY DID THEY PLAY A TRACK CALLED “IN THE CLOSET” WHEN MIKE STARTS SPEAKING!!!!!!!!!!!! NOT WILL!!! this is also right after he said “we’re firends we’re friends!!” no its not just because el is in a literal closet here, the track starts during mike and wills fight.

why did they play a track that is EXTREMELY similar to the track eulogy during mike and el’s fight, a track thats only played when someone dies.

(emotional, tender music). why. its only used in romantic contexts. we see it used with byler, lumax, jopper, and once with mlvn when theyre at the pizza place.

why did they frame will out of focus in the middle of mike and el when they reunited!!? at first i thought this was just to emphasize will’s pov but now im thinking it might be more symbolic of will getting in between mike and eleven. he himself isnt doing that at all though, quite the opposite actually- he keeps giving mike relationship advice and hes the reason mike told el he loves her, so it must be in reference to how will is disrupting mike and els relationship because of mikes feelings for him.

why did they keep will in the frame when mike said he loved her? the only other time we had a similar one on one emotional monologue delivery to someone was in s2 when joyce, jonathan, and mike were trying to reach will and mike told him asking him to be friends was the best thing hes ever done. that was shot as if there were no one else in the room it was very centered around just will and mike, whereas this monologue shows will in the same frame as mike as well as will and jonathans reactions to what hes saying.

and lastly, WHY did they frame every couple so dramatically paired off together in the final shot while el was all alone. joyce and hopper, mike and will, and jonanathan and nancy. theyve done this in the past but this was the first time they made it excruciatingly obvious.

damn i wasnt gonna list out every thing i know when i first started answering this but thats what i ended up doing. anyways, again, i understand giving up considering how disappointing volume 2 was, but absolutely no way was it all in our heads. look at all that.

i still have hope just for the sheer fact that not only mike wheeler as a character, but all their film choices surrounding mike wheeler make no fucking sense unless hes gay and DEEP in the closet.

#jeuss thats a lot #im gonna think of another huge one i forgot right after i post this i know it #i could have included s2 but i wanted to compare it with el a lot and theyre barely together that season #thats not even all of it i only included the ones i know had to be intentional #there are so many others that im still kinda on the fence about #i wanna be convinced about mikes arrow on his heart always pointing to will but im not 100% sold yet #byler #stranger things #eden answers

[gemapples]

Rant away my friend

apparently a few people wanted me to vent about the kirby novels so head in hands ig i'm gonna go for it LMAO (this is inspired directly from @desultory-novice 's posts about it)

ALSO IM SORRY IF THIS IS SO DISORGANIZED gonna be honest i forgot a good half of what i wanted to talk about. But Anyways. please note that all of this is entirely My opinion you ofc dont need to agree and despite everything i actually really love and enjoy the kirby novels a lot !!

so okay after hearing her talk about the reason we're likely not getting a magolor epilogue novel and knowing takase's erm.... Infamous reputation regarding how she handles magolor's character that had me thinking a lot and. Wow i'm kind of Really nervous for how this magoland novel will turn out actually because a lot is kind of at stake here when you think about it

takase will either be forced to actually develop magolor's character, or she will just completely scrap everything that happened earlier, remove any mentions of the epilogue and go straight back to square 1 where magolor is -- once again -- the villain of the story. Don't get me wrong i like evil magolor a lot lol i think if done right it can be a very enjoyable portrayal of his character. but there's only So many times you can make a character the antagonist before it just gets straight up exhausting y'know

i think it's ESPECIALLY different in terms of magoland. This might be a cold take idk lmao but merry magoland isn't just some wacky little theme park magolor created out of the blue for no reason. It's something that signifies and sets in stone how he's a changed character. Merry magoland is magolor's dream he's had for a really long time by his own words and truly shows that all he's wanted to do is make people have fun and be happy. if you make him the antagonist in that, that completely just fucks up Everything relating to his character and renders that entire development null and also invalidates all the hardships he's gone through to make that happen

i do think takase's portrayal of magolor is fun! i do enjoy it and i do appreciate how he has a hard time communicating his desires and showing true friendship. i think that's important. one of magolor's most significant flaws is how he has a hard time understanding how friendship is supposed to work and what to do when you have friends. but maybe instead of making him the villain. Over and over and over again you could idk... have him Learn?? and actually Develop from his issues??? i know waddle dee is a completely separate character but for the sake of comparing to another person who has gone through a huge amount of development in the novels -- why can't magolor do the same? why is it constantly so insistent that he be the one causing all the problems for no reason other than haha it's funny (in most cases at least. i know dreamy gear was different and i will give it a giant shoutout for that)

i'm so sorry if i sound too harsh here i literally don't know how to word it otherwise lol i think it's important to emphasize that despite everything i do like seeing magolor's character in the novels. but it just gets to a point where it's Grating to me at times and depending on the scenario is just completely inaccurate. that's why i think magoland is such a huge point for us here with a lot on the line -- if she chooses to not make magolor the antagonist and make it accurate to the game's actions and desires, that will be an essential key for his development and showcase that we're actually making progress with his character. but if she chooses to make him the antagonist again, the potential for him being something more than a villain -- which is RIGHT there -- is completely wiped

afaik magolor and kirby's friendship was also mentioned and i just want to throw out there. merry magoland happened because of kirby. merry magoland happened because of magolor's friends. kirby, meta knight, dedede and bandee are the reason merry magoland exists. so if takase chooses to not acknowledge any mention of that and make magolor go against them all, that also erases the potential of magolor's relationship with other characters as well yknow... the characters he's gone against for this whole time? it also makes no sense whatsoever??

so yeah this is a bit long but there's just a lot to either look forward to or dread about this novel -- or even both lmao -- the more i thought about it. i want to have a decent amount of hope that i could be wrong here, maybe takase will take advantage of what she has to work with game wise and create something truly special. but throughout all of magolor's appearances in the novels... *hand on mirror* it seems like all of his character is constantly scrapped in favor of treating him like some apathetic irredeemable character with no regard for others or understanding friendship. so that's kind of a hard pill to swallow

#ask

[yxstxrdrxxm]

(Since i already did reveal myself, i'll just send asks without being an anon lol)

Oh! That's easy, actually. Although we won't be available when we leave tomorrow, we contacted a certain someone that can run this blog and inform us of any messages you have for either me or Eros ^^

Navina? 👀

Speaking of, Eros wanted to tell you that he appreciated your presence, Mochi! Every time we talked about you and the others, I've seen him smile and mutter something about getting a calico cat and naming her after you. It was so cute! Eros never had any close friends other than me, so seeing her talk about everyone and you like we were all best friends warmed my heart.

SJNSKSJDJD- THAT IS SO CUTE??? Naming a calico cat after me, awhhh 🥺 cupid, can you tell eros that i appreciate knowing her too?? Tell her i said she's very cute too- (and yk there's something funny about your words. I also have a calico cat roaming around my house lmaoo, why is my life so full of funny coincidence-)

Aha... Anyways, before I go on rambling, that's all I can say. We'll see what we can do to make things easier and so we can speak to you all again, hehe! I hope you'll still be around when that happens :D

Oh yeah, i forgot to copy the sentence, but uhh, about that interesting thing in next month, i'll be sure to keep my eyes on it! Whether it'd be another event (i doubt it would be this one, please rest navina 💀) or anything else, i will be enthusiastic about it :] AND YES, I WILL STILL BE AROUND 🙆🏻‍♀️ you can't get rid of me, i'm like that small mistake when you're drawing and you just can't seem to erase it unless you get to the layer who has it-

Hehe, whoever it is will be a surprise, but I'll tell Eros that you appreciate the sentiment as well! She's out right now to get some last minute groceries (and also snacks, we'll be having a small movie night to celebrate our resignation!), so she'll definitely be pleased to hear your message.

Anyway, its nice to see you'll stick around even if we won't be here, then :D hope you enjoy what else will go down while we're busy settling some last minute plans.

(note from yours truly: HELPAIDSRFHUI NOT THE CALICO CAT... dwdw, Im gonna rest for after the main story + maybe writing the dlc fics. on hindsight, they might not be guaranteed to be all posted because bro, my brain needs a huge reboot when this sht is all done and dusted. orz.)

(tbh the next one wont be abt OLC anymore, thankfully, but! it will also reference this + make small cameos. Dont know what I'll do this time around when I get the chance but we shall see kek)

(Istg though when Im done Im gonna limit whoever I'll write. I love writing all of these characters and thinking abt them but God do I now resent how many I have to research. fuck THAT.)

(anyways!! I shall go eep for a good while on writing + maybe post dlcs. I will say that some fics will most def not be published even after the week for dlc stuff/extra fics because my brain just. isnt braining. orz orz im gonna cry. i'll prolly post them randomly idk HAIUHDUFSI anyways ill shut up now goodbye—)

#💌 ;; messenger writes #💌 ;; promising letter: one last call #💌 ;; a letter from: mochinon-yah #;; ill make a proper tag for cupid but aaaaaa too lazy #;; anyways yuh #;; tmr is the last day of the main story + event so I am VERY stoked #;; finally... now i gotta worry of the dlc stuff LMAO #;; might just make some short snippets though. writing full fics is rlly taxing esp to those i dont know much on writing for #;; so theirs will be as short as wandys #;; but the rest... we'll see lol. #;; we'll see.

[theimportanceofnotme]

12/10/2023 Cont...

We spoke and decided to try things again but only if I stopped with the Coke and he stopped Drinking. We were in agreance with that and I started a new job as a live in nurse for a Spanish lady which im not gonna get into cause that was hell but on my second day his mother sent me pictures of how he had destroyed the trash can and broke his phone in a drunken rage so I told him what him and I were starting up again is done cause im not going to date an alcoholic after living with one and dealing with them most of my life. Which i think was valid but he was sad and I told him tough shit at first. I kept my distance and went back to Dylan emotionally. That didn't last very long tho cause I dropped Dylan off at our friend Marcus's house to drink and have a good time while I was getting over a cold and I told him to just spend the night there so I could get some good sleep in. I got a call a few hours later for me to pick him up and I was pissed off but got up anyways and as I was driving there our mutual friend was blowing my phone up with texts. Come to find out the reason he needed to be picked up was because his Ex-Girlfriend he was living with and STILL FUCKING just found out about me and him also fucking. I was mad. He could have simply told the both of us that he was doing us both and we BOTH would have Been okay with it cause it wasn't anything majorly serious. But he caused a huge scene between all of us and He sorta ran away and I ended up going to a trap house with his ex and our friend. I smoked a cigarette and took a few shots. We all came back to Marcus's house and I started to go back to my truck to head home pissed. But the fact that I wasn't crying made me stop for a minute cause I usually burst into tears during any kind of confrontation. So I pull out my phone and I send Dylan a text asking him if he's good. He told me where he was and I don't mess around with suicide attempts so I rushed to where he was and I went to make sure he was okay. My initial plan was to leave him there with a blanket so he didn't freeze that night but I felt bad so I gave him the option of either going back to Marcus's house, back to his Ex's, or we call 211 and find him a shelter for the night. He had a huge fit and I made sure to let him know he could just spend the night outside with just a flimsy blanket and clothes he got on right then and there and eventually we decided he was going to get dropped off at his Ex's. That whole mess was terrible and eventually I thought we could get over it all and just go back to being plain ol friends but he caught hella feelings. I invited him to smoke with me and a few of my friends which he agreed to so I picked him up and everything was chill like it used to be until I went to drop him off. He was going off the rails about how him and I were born into this world for each other and what not which was frustrating and during this time I was also getting things patched up with Dante again. He got himself sober and asked me questions on how to better himself which I tried to answer but who am I to tell him what makes a man a good man. Dante and I decided to get back together and pretend the manic episode didn't happen, but only for other people. If we need to we can still talk about it which is good for us but other people don't need to know about it. Dante asked me to block Dylan and I did without hesitation. But I didn't block him on Instagram cause I barely used it and frankly I kinda forgot Dylan and I followed each other there. Now I use Instagram more cause family decided it was going to be the new Facebook and I post things and he hearts everything, he's tried messaging me on there and I just muted him and I find myself posting new things for him to see. I know hes going to see it and I want him to and I wait for him to send me another message that I can read and not respond to. I'm not sure if I just like the attention but lately I've even been masturbating to the thought of him and I bumping into each other somewhere and we run to my car and we go at it like feral hormonal animals.

[theresa-of-liechtenstein]

@lavstar i was so incredibly stupid and i deleted your ask while i was drafting it… i swear i didn’t forget to do it 😭 anyway i’ve FINALLY finished it so let’s jump into the compilation of the most planes i have ever brainrot ❤️ because no ❤️ you cannot expect me to pick one ❤️ it is impossible ❤️

two airbus A320s taking off from parallel runways, five nautical miles apart ‘cause they’re not gay!

btw i genuinely do not care about military aircraft (never have, prob never will) so these are all to do with civil aviation. also huge disclaimer i did all the commentary off the top of my head (i did have to wikipedia some of the stats im not martin fucking crieff) so if i mess up a term or something that’s on me

of course no post about my favorite planes cannot leave out the OG. my first love, the most plane i have ever ridden; the one, the only, the increasingly irrelevant due to industry shifts, the beloved Airbus A380.

(L) just look at this big beautiful girl! + (R) a view of i believe scotland? as approached from the north

i don’t know why i love this plane so much, because lots of other people certainly don’t for a lot of reasons. her size makes her the main character out of necessity at every airport she comes across, and she’s an inconvenience for air traffic controllers for that reason. her origin story is [twitter stan account voice] a bit problematic. given changes in industry trends, she is also quickly becoming irrelevant. airbus my beloved please just admit that the four engines thing was nostalgia and go. she’s a marvel of engineering sure, but when all is said and done…the B747 came, she served cunt, and then she got phased out. the A380 was made with the intention of doing the same…unfortunately, she didn’t really complete the second step.

wait holy shit. i know why i love this plane so much. it’s because this plane…is me ❤️

—

and now for thee og in terms of famous big-ass planes that everyone loves: the B747. everyone loves the 747. even if they say they’re not into planes, they are. for me, not gonna lie: a very big reason for why i love the Queen of the Skies so much is mark vanhoenacker’s book, skyfaring. he flew the 747 for bri’ish airways (when they still had them) and loved that plane so much and man who am i to blame him.

(L) i think i teared up when i saw her through the big windows for the first time bc i was like oh my god. i am going to be on her. this icon of aviation, the arguable symbol of commercial aviation. so much history, so much significance… + (R) the past, the present, and the future of british airways in one image 🥺

i was on a 747 twice in my life. once on a cathay pacific flight to the philippines, and on my last flight abroad, on a british airways flight to heathrow. little did i know i was flying one of the last of their 747 flights—they phased them out completely the following year, a bit earlier than anticipated due to the pandemic.

as enzo ferrari once probably said, “ask a child to draw a plane, and certainly he will put a hump and four engines on it.” in terms of sheer iconic power and energy, the Queen (and she is the only earthly being to whom I shall ever refer as such) would far and away be the top on anyone’s list, save for the fact that i don’t have a top to this list and i have other planes to get to dear god this is getting long do you know what you’ve got yourself into!! the Queen really said “flight belongs to the people now” and the airlines just had to shut up and listen!! she is truly the main character!!!

genuinely don’t remember what river this is except that it’s in the UK… 🙈

i feel like everything else i say about her is just going to be a pale imitation of how evocative skyfaring was, so honestly i really recommend the book it’s so good and it’s one of my favorites. my copy is sort of falling apart now bc i kept bringing it around to places 😭 anyway, the number of airlines using her for passengers is decreasing, but you know who still use converted versions of her as well as purpose-built models? cargo airlines! anyway, ups and their brown planes my beloved 🤎

—

this slot was going to go to the B767 and 757, and i was going to rhapsodize about how aesthetically the 767 looks like a nicer plane to me because of Chonk, but the 757 is really endearing because it’s a narrowbody jet and it’s got landing gear that is long in a useful but unusual-looking way, which in essence what i’m trying to say is that if the 757 were a person, it would be esteban ocon.

so i was getting ready to write all of this down in much more words than i needed, but i remembered suddenly the very reason i was making this post in the first place. and that, my friends, is the B777.

honestly you don’t fully understand how big the 777 is until you see it in person. because we are all acclimated to think of like the 747 when we think of ‘big plane.’ but the 777 is massive. even i forgot about it when i wrote That Fanfic.

the 777 and 787 are the future of long-haul commercial aviation (and i say this as an A380 stannie). widebody jets with 2 big-ass engines are most likely what we’re going to see in the sky going forward when it comes to long-distance travel, and the pandemic pretty much confirmed that.

that aside, i love the 777. so much that i wrote a whole fanfic around one making an emergency landing ❤️ i really pretended ETOPS (the thing where a plane can fly for a long time on one engine) did not exist for six chapters and an alternate ending and i think that’s just very quirky of me aha 🤪

dear god do not mind my hat i literally bought it because of fred fucking thursday of endeavour… what the FUCK was teenage me on 😭

the 777 was supposed to be a trijet (one with three engines, two under each wing and one built into the vertical stabilizer) but as the mcdonnell douglas and lockheed martin trijets (cba to look up the numbers) were not projected to continue to be successful, they got rid of the trijet 777 idea and instead made it have two engines. another thing i think is neat is that all the examples of the 777 that you will see in the wild right now don’t have winglets bc the wings themselves are so long and raked back that they’re not necessary. which would be a weird thing for me in particular to find neat, because if you know me well you know i have a thing for winglets. (the 2022 f1 car’s front wing my BELOVED WAKSKDKSJSJ!!!!!) i also think the way the wingtip lights are incorporated into the wings are so neat. the upgraded version they’re trying to make now, the 777X, will have foldy wingtips so you can DIY your own winglets and i think that’s hilarious (and also cool).

—

genuinely i think i’m the only plane person that likes this last aircraft: the Embraer ERJ-175. i like her for purely nostalgic reasons. she reminds me of how i returned to my roots and decided to pursue engineering.

so okay this is going to have nothing to do with the plane, but i was lucky enough to be given a visit to the flightdeck after landing back home from a weekend trip. i was so excited to be allowed to sit in the first officer’s seat, and got to poke around the flightdeck for like ten minutes. which was cool, but all this was with the sinking realization that even operating a regional jet might be too physically demanding (read: unsafe) for someone of my… [exhales knowing EXACTLY what i’m about to walk into] height.

that is one fully glass cockpit. also those yokes are specific to embraer, boeing’s look more like f1 steering wheels with stuff cut out of them i think, and airbus’s are operated by side stick. it’s almost funny especially when watching flightdeck videos of the a380 cause it’s like… you’re doing All That *gestures vaguely at plane* with THAT *gestures at thing that looks like a chicken drumstick with semiconductors implanted in it*

so that was piloting as a career done with for me (much to my family’s relief.) and then i thought “hm i don’t have to be flying planes all the time to be working around them…why don’t i work on developing them instead?” and i was passively interested in matsci already, so that’s how and when i decided to pursue engineering, with hopes of working for airbus or boeing and in civil aviation.

we’ll see how that pans out, i say as i side-eye the exponential growth of my interest in motorsport.

thanks for the ask! i’m so sorry i was stupid and deleted it but i hope you like this very long, drawn out, and frankly deranged response 💚

#em speaks #lavstar #this is half me showing off my plane pictures half deranged rant i hope you enjoy

[percyjacksonfan3]

The Last Olympian Thoughts

So because I have absolutely 0 self-control or restraint when it comes to this series and its characters, and for The Last Olympian in particular, I could not put TLO down. Because of this I figured I couldn’t do the usual photo reaction posts I have been so far, because the spam would just be ridiculous, so I am stealing the idea from @yourstrulytaaay​ to do a masterpost instead. (Adding a Read More cause this got ridiculously long)

Fun fact, TLO came out right after i finished reading the series for the first time so it's the first PJO book i bought  and my only hard cover one for the og series. I checked the year and turns out it was published 2009, which means i was actually 9 when i read the series for the first time. I realize this is not really a fun fact but i thought i was older when I first read the series so it's blowing my mind a little ‘cause now I’m 21 and everything hits different and i still have so much love for this series and the characters Okay onto book thoughts: - i was right that this book is gonna destroy me, the first line alone made me so excited and nostalgic it's ridiculous - I love Rachel and Percy sm tbh. Her being a bit of peace and normalcy in his life without always reminding Percy of who and what he is is so good for him. Just a little escape

- of course by the end of the book that's not the case any more but by the end he's lived his prophecy so he doesn't need it as badly, plus he and Annabeth are solid again - Percy saying Annabeth has been hard to be around lately... Ouch my heart. Luke really is the last thing that keeps them from being together and Percy is so jealous and Annabeth so torn and in pain, i feel so bad for them both

- Beckendorf 🥺🥺 - the telkhine with the Lil Demon lunchbox!! I forgot about him. Percy: 'i left him alive, partly because his lunchbox was cool' is one of my absolute favourite lines tbh - Paul taking Percy crabbing and being imperative in helping Percy kill the giant crab 💖 Paul Blofis is important and deserves the world, okay? - aw Percy, you can't save every demigod bb

- 'i had to fight him eventually. Why not now?... What difference would a week make?' Oh Percy you have no idea - real talk tho, the fact Kronos possessed Luke's body would also mess me tf up. Percy keeps forgetting it's not Luke anymore and yeah, that would be so so hard and confusing af, like what another smart little mind game for Kronos to pull on top of everything else - the fact Percy fights Kronos before getting the Achilles Curse and actually doesn't die within seconds is... Astounding. He kicks him in the chest! And yeah Kronos is weaker and still adjusting to Luke's body, but Percy is having trouble fighting Luke cause they used to be friends - Percy breaks Kronos' time magic!! Like?! Boy is POWERFUL.

- OUCH - honestly Luke, Thalia and Annabeth's family breaking the way it did... Don't talk to me. Poor Annabeth, Luke betrayed them, Thalia joined the Hunters because of Luke's betrayal so she's pretty much AWOL all the time and then Luke dies. Like Rick wtf, my heart can't take it? -Percy and Tyson having each others backs when talking to Poseidon in the underwater palace is the brother-brother relationship we love to see - Percy trying to stick a sand dollar in the vending machines at school 🤦🏻‍♀🤦🏻‍♀ - the whole underwater interaction at Poseidon's palace? Perfection. Awkward family drama and all - Connor falling out of the tree when he sees Percy because he's so excited 😂😂

- 😭💖

- k, ik Clarisse isn't perfect but tbh if i was a child of Ares whose father was disrespected and hated by my fellow campers (ares deserves it but still) and that disrespect trickled down to how the other campers treated ME (which if Percy is reliable here, it obviously does) then i would also be irritated at being used for muscle and nothing else? And just expected to fight with the people who act as if they'd rather not have Ares kids around the rest of the time. Like Clarisse isn't totally wrong - Percy reading the prophecy, seeing he's meant to die and just being like 'i do not see it' and refusing to outright think about it makes me so sad for him - (but it taints every action after and he's super reckless afterwards bc of it- including finally breaking and accepting the Achilles Curse) - (also him taking this as the last straw and finally beginning to show Annabeth how he really feels, cause fuck it, he's dying anyway) - Give me more info about Rachel's backstory and family Rick!! -  how did i forget Percy willingly eats chocolates that taste like cardboard because 'i didnt have anything against cardboard' like sir? Ik Silena didn't want them but still? - 'she'd always been cute, but she was starting to be seriously beautiful' STOP, MY HEART CAN'T TAKE IT - Percy staring at Annabeth and forgetting what they're talking about cause hes so distracted 👌🏻

- hmm yeah... For some strange reason.... - i forgot how Percy totally bombs this convo bw them and now want to cry 😭 Annabeth is trying to talk about what's important and Percy, you sweet oblivious man, you're shooting her down without even realizing - love that they're both on the same wavelength tho. Percy two lines before, hmm it's cool to date ppl from other cabins, wonder why im thinking that around Annabeth, my best friend in the world, and then Annabeth a beat later, hmm, let me bring up Silena and Beckendorf and how it's important to be with the people you love when you have the chance, no way Percy will miss this huge hint right? - they're the best - k i honestly forgot Percy full on physically intimidates Leneus like that - luke telling his mom if he ran away the monsters wouldnt get her..i can just imagine luke crying when he says good bye before running away because he thinks it's his fault his mom is like that and he cant take care of and protect her anymore because it's too hard - uh oh now i have angsty pre-lightning thief luke fic inspo... Him, Thalia and Annabeth on the run... The ANGST -  Rick holds absolutely nothing back in this book and i am in pain - HESTIA!! 💖💖🥰 - actual loml - i love that Rick titled this book after her and that he wrote such a great series about the importance of family (biological, found or otherwise) and home, and that he said actually Hestia is the most important bc shes the most humble and keeps the peace and knows when to fight and when to yield and you protect what you love, which is your home - i just... Adore Hestia - Grover! Missed you babes - Hades is so so horrible to Nico, always comparing him to Bianca :/ - but i do love Hades, Persephone and Demeter together they make me laugh - oh god the River Styx - Achilles 🥺 - Annabeth being Percy's lifeline is, and continues to be, A Lot™ - 'my name was Percy Jackson. I reached up and took Annabeth's hand.' LOL Why am i crying? - Like the fact there is no Percy without Annabeth, and that remembering her literally reminded him of who he is in his very soul... It's fine im fine - i won't even get into the parallels of her being his lifeline now and then later when Hera takes his memories but leaves the memory of Annabeth for Percy to fight to get back to (anyone who wants to yell about it with me... Feel free to message) - badass Percy is my fav Percy tbh - him defeating Hades?? Like? Hades is arguably the most powerful god, okay - i feel bad for Nico but if i was Percy I'd do the exact same, Nico, sorry man but this is a high stakes time crunch deal and Nico is literally the only hope of persuading Hades and distracted by his own internal stuff - flashbacks to Luke, Thalia and Annabeth hurt, ow - George and Martha are the best - damn i forgot Hermes full on nearly kills Percy here, yikes - Luke stop cockblocking Percabeth challenge

- i love!! Percy's love for New York!! So much!! - Percy leaving to live in New Rome in HoO is a lie and this is all the proof i need for why - the fact the entire last half of the book is the battle and aftermath... Such great buildup and pacing. All the tricks and twists and battles in this War of Manhattan? I would not take out a thing, Rick, you legend - of course then the final battle in hoo with the gods is what? Two pages? Ugh, don’t talk to me about my hatred for BoO and HoO - 'no detours you two' is still the cutest thing!!! - THE HUNTERS!! Thalia i missed you - good job Percy, you finally spent your sand dollar - Minotaur!! - 'dont i get a kiss for luck? Its kind of a tradition right?' Percy finds out he's gonna die and is out of fucks to give and honestly I support him - also Michael just standing beside these two while they're flirting like umm 👀 👀 while a monster army marches towards them, nbd - Annabeth taking Ethan's knife meant for Percy!!! Cause she just knows his weak spot without him even telling her! They literally invented love - Feral Percy is so scary omg, i love how well Rick incorporates the Achilles Curse in this novel, with the whole heightened weaknesses and stuff ans the parallels to Achilles arrogance being what killed him and Percy's loyalty, fierceness and protective instinct being his own heightened weakness - the fact that Percy is the one who inadvertantly kills Michael Yew tho, I'll never recover from that - the fact Hades offers Maria di Angelo a golden palace by the Styx like how Poseidon offers Sally a palace under the sea tho. Let's talk about that parallel - the entire talk with Prometheus is so so good - not me picturing young Luke hiding in the closet to get away from his mom when she has an 'episode' -i love callbacks in stories and all of the callbacks to the rest of the series in this book make me very happy (medusa, minotaur, the underworld, Rainbow!! My baby!!, Daedalus and more) - Percy summoning a wholeass hurricane against Hyperion - the Party Ponies! They're so chaotic, i love it - Dionysus! 😁 I can't help it, i love him - Percy absolutely losing it when he sees Sally and Paul asleep in the car 🥺 - Rachel telling Percy he's not the hero screws with him so much :( poor bb - although i really really love how Rick wrote this, it's so refreshing to not have one chosen one save the world, but a combination of people - the drakon, Silena and Clarisse make me cry - the Patrochilles references, im not okay - Annabeth giving up on Luke after hearing what he did to Silena and Percy telling her that doesn't make him happy 😭 that whole interaction makes my heart ache - Percy giving Hestia Pandora's pithos 🥺 - and Hades, Nico and the others coming for a final attack is so badass, i love it - listen im glad the og trio were the ones to confront Luke on Olympus but the fact Thalia got so close and then pinned by a statue of HERA makes me so sad. Ik her and Luke were finished and she coped by cutting him off completely and giving up all hope but i would pay money to know what they would have said to each other to say goodbye - Ethan 🥺 - Poseidon joining the fight against Typhon is so cool, such a great scene - 'PEANUT BUTTER!' - Annabeth you brilliant badass you - RIP Luke, you werent great but you werent the worst either - the gods just rolling up seconds too late, wondering wtf happened in Olympus and who the dead body is - the chapter where the Olympians meet and give out rewards is one of my absolute favourites (again i am incensed we didn't get anything like this in HoO) - will Percy turning down immortality ever not make me scream in glee? No? Alright then - Annabeth being relieved like Percy was relieved at the end of Titan's Curse tho - oh Hermes :/ - its so hard reading all this and knowing what comes in HoO... Like it's such a cathartic, earned and mostly happy and peaceful ending and then HoO comes along and undermines it all - aww Rick let Paul see Olympus somehow pls, he deserves it, he killed a dracanae - (i would also love to see it) - Percy being more upset Rachel took his pegasus than her going to Camp and possibly dying, lol, priorities dude - i honestly think that Rick had other ideas for the second Great Prophecy and how things would go down in BoO, cause the prophecy like... Barely applies to BoO, Doors of Death are in book four, and explabations of it is all so unclear when Rick is usually pretty good with that stuff - PERCABETH - lol Percy complaining about privacy when he and Annabeth are caught kissing literally in the middle of the very open and public dining pavilion, okay - BEST UNDERWATER KISS OF ALL TIME - that's it and im a glass case of emotion - very happy to say that this series remains my favourite of all time 💖

 If anyone ever wants to come gush about anything Riordanverse related feel free, because as you can see I have a lot of thoughts about it all

#lau rereads pjo #the last olympian is my favourite book for a REASON #honestly every line is killer #so much subtext to read into #the dialogue #the relationships are dialed up to 11 #every character is so on point #the battle strategies too? are just so interesting? #I just adore it #Tay don't read any of this yet cause it's all spoilers #alright I'm gonna go write fic to express these feelings now #tlo #the last olympian #pjo #pjato #percy jackson

[s-and-n-writes]

another long day

crimson and bluebell: part two

summary:

Marinette Rossi is tired of everything: from Lila’s constant berating and Madame Rossi’s preferential care of her ‘angel-like’ daughter, to how everyone at school (even Alya) seems to believe her evil stepsister over her.

It’s like she’s Cinderella, except without the fairy godmother and the happy ending. She doesn’t even have a prince.

Or so she thinks.

Between the appearance of a new boy who seems to have captured her heart, and a gala run by her fashion idol Gabriel Agreste, Marinette hopes for an escape the constant ignorance, workload, and bullying she endures, and get a blissful life of her own.

With the help of one tiny god and a meow-velous partner, she might finally get a chance, but not everything is that simple.

They say ladybugs are lucky, so will being the elusive Ladybug bring Marinette the luck she oh-so-desperately needs?

quick links:

< previous chapter | first chapter | next chapter >

| miraculous masterlist | series masterlist |

a/n: so hi again, it’s me, n! im so so so sorry that i didn’t post for a long time, school caught up with me and everything’s getting v stressful these days. regardless, my new year’s resolution is to post more of these, and i’ll actively make an effort to do that hehe, in the meantime, enjoy!

also i’m appalled at the fact that this was 15 pages long and took more than a month to write how are you doing

Marinette had thought that the whole coffee spill, glass breaking fiasco would be relatively easy to clean.

She was wrong.

It takes her all of 10 minutes to clean up the glass, and another 20 minutes to try and clean up the coffee.

Key word: try.

Marinette ends up at school 30 minutes late, the coffee-stained carpet rolled off to the side at home, effectively ruined. She hasn’t even thought about the cracked glass table yet, which she hid by placing a tissue over top of it after Lila left.

Needless to say, all of this puts a little bit of a damper on her day.

As Marinette walks up the staircase of Francois Dupont, the school she goes to, she spots Alya Cesaire inside. Alya is Marinette’s closest friend, and despite having moved to Paris only a year ago, it feels like Marinette has known her for their entire lives.

“Girl, girl, girl…” Alya sighs as Marinette walks through the doors. It’s a free period, and students litter the area. Marinette spots Lila walking with one of her friends on the other side of the school, and luckily, Lila doesn’t see her.

There’s one good thing about school that Marinette adores: she doesn’t have to see Lila. Lila’s always had Madame Mendeleev for homeroom, and Marinette’s had Madame Bustier. Because of this, their schedules never interact, which allows Marinette to avoid Lila for the duration of the school day.

“I’m so sorry!” Marinette pleads, running up to Alya and shrugging her backpack off her shoulder. “There was a coffee spill, and glass broke, and-OH GOD I MISSED THE MATH TEST!!!”

“Marinette, chill,” Alya laughs. “The math test got rescheduled, but Ms.Bustier is pretty mad about you being late,”

Marinette sighs. “That’s a relief,”

“But you still missed a lot of news~,” Alya says, singing the last word.

Alya aspires to be a journalist, so on the occasions that Marinette wasn’t late, Alya would give her anything and everything interesting she’d dug up that week.

"I know, I know," Marinette sighs, fingers loosely picking at her shirt again. The seams stay intact, but Marinette's mind doesn't. The coffee spill and the glass breaking is constantly on her mind; she's not sure what to do. 

"Nice shirt, girl," Alya smiles, breaking Marinette away from her thoughts. Alya's good at that, and she notices when Marinette lets her mind wander, something that happens a little too often for her tastes. "Did you make it?" 

Marinette bursts into a grin. "Yes! I used that gorgeous thread that Sabine bought last week for my birthday, you know, the one I kept talking about, and it was absolutely amazing! I had to make this! What do you think? Do you like it?" 

The shirt is simple; a white base with flowers of varying sizes lining the edge. Marinette pairs it with her old, pink jeans (the fabric for the flowers on her shirt came from some leftover ones she had when making the jeans) and a dark-gray blazer that Lila used to own. 

"It's beautiful," Alya smiles, "But hey, I’m more excited for you-know-who’s reaction," 

Marinette rolls her eyes, hiding her face as an involuntary blush rises to her face. "Alya! You know I don't like him like that!," 

Alya grins. "Just teasing," 

“Well, anyways, tell me what I missed during lunch, I’m off to the classroom, before Ms. Bustier comes looking for me,” Marinette smiles, turning and running up the stairs. 

“Good luck, girl!” Alya says, waving goodbye and pulling out her phone. 

“Good luck, girl!” Alya says, waving goodbye and pulling out her phone.

The day passes quickly, and lunch comes sooner than Marinette expects.

She meets Alya outside of Francois Dupont, and they both head to Ville de Soirée, a cafe which isn’t nearly as expensive as the others in the area. They both order their usuals, and sit in one of the booths as they wait for their drinks.

Marinette sighs and leans back. “Ok, ok, tell me,”

Alya, who is most probably on the verge of exploding from her excitement, gears up. “Ok, so you know Nino, right?”

“You mean the boy you’ve been obsessing over since we met him?” Marinette teases. “Oh hey, I might have an inkling,”

Alya blushes, her cheeks tinting rouge. “Shut up,”

Marinette giggles. “Ok, go on,”

“Anyway, Nino texted me yesterday that his parents finally agreed, and he’ll be starting school starting Monday next week!”

“Ah! That’s so exciting! I’m so happy for you!” Marinette laughs. “Now you can actually make a move!”

“Don’t get ahead of yourself, I’ll let you play matchmaker when the time comes,” Alya laughs, “there’s also something else, and this one I know you’ll be even happier about,”

The barista interrupts Alya, placing two steaming drinks in front of them. They both reach for their drinks, with Marinette holding the cup in her hand and Alya taking a sip. She grins.

“Nino’s friend, you know, Adrien Agreste, is also coming too,”

She pulls back, looking smug as she tries to read Marinette’s face.

The girl in question sighs, shaking her head. “Who even is Adrien, and why does everyone keep mentioning him to me?”

Alya facepalms, groaning.

“Girl, sometimes I swear you live under a rock,” Alya sighs, shaking her head. “How do you not know who Adrien Agreste is? His ads are literally everywhere!”

Marinette pouts. “Well maybe I just haven’t seen him,”

Alya rolls her eyes and shakes her head. “Ohh no, there’s no way you’ve missed him ,”

She pulls up her phone and momentarily scrolls as Marinette waits.

“Here,” she says, “That’s him,”

The photo on Alya’s screen is from last February, Marinette recognizes. She remembers how Lila bought a copy of the magazine it came in, although she wasn’t allowed to see it.

But the boy is familiar. His face is similar to someone’s, but Marinette can’t pinpoint who it—

Oh.

Oh.

He’s Gabriel Agreste’s son.

Marinette leans back.

“That’s Monsieur Agreste’s son! I should’ve known, how could I have missed it when Madame Rossi told us about him?”

Alya squints her eyes. “Wait what?”

“There’s a fashion show that Adrien’s dad is hosting, and the embassy’s holding a huge event to greet all the fashion officials that are coming. Madame Rossi got us all passes to go,” Marinette says.

“That’s the one my mom’s cooking for! It’s next weekend right? She would not stop talking about it all weekend. I can try and score a pass, to you know, keep you company?”

Marinette gasps suddenly, burying her face in her hands, “Ah! I forgot! I won’t be able to go, since Li— I mean I, spilled coffee all over our new carpet,”

Alya raises an eyebrow.

“Fine, fine, I cracked some glass too,” Marinette sighs, face growing redder. “Madame Rossi’s gonna ground me for sure!”

Alya shakes her head. “Somehow I can believe it. You are the clumsiest person I know,”

She nods thoughtfully, fingers closing around the fox necklace on her neck. “Well I can’t deal with the whole glass situation, but maybe I can help with the coffee stuff? Happens to my mom all the time,”

Marinette perks up. “Really? Would you? Oh thank you Alya!”

Alya laughs. “No problem girl, I’ll come by after your shift at the bakery,”

Marinette pauses. After work would be...when Lila comes home.

Alya has always been a fan of Lila, but despite knowing Marinette, she’s only admired Marinette’s less-than-wonderful sister from afar. This means that so far, Marinette has managed to keep Alya and Lila separate.

Does she really want to risk that?

Weighing in the situation, she sighs. Would she rather have a shot at attending a potentially life-changing event, or safely escape Alya meeting Lila?

Knowing the both of them, Marinette remembers, they’d be a deadly combo.

But Marinette really wants to go to the event so, maybe this time, she might just give in.

“Great!” Marinette says, happiness laced with fear. “That’s...great!

Alya nods, smiling, watching as Marinette giggles.

“Now about setting you up with Nino…”

Alya turns away, blushing, “Marinette!”

Today

Lie-la 😒: sup loser

Lie-la 😒: im going to the mall with my friends after school

Lie-la 😒: if my mom comes in early

Lie-la 😒: you know what to say

Lie-la 😒: type, maribrat. use those lousy fingers.

You: yea, sure lila.

Lie-la 😒: good.

Marinette sighs and pockets her phone. For today, she is safe.

And that’s all she has ever wanted.

Marinette’s day ends with her feeling happier than when it began. Alya’s coming over to wash out the coffee stain, Lila won’t be there when she gets home, and she’s heading to her shift at the bakery!

It’s normal for work to not be exciting to most people, but for Marinette, it always is. Heading to the Dupain-Cheng bakery is always the highlight of her day, and working there is even better. The owners, Sabine and Tom, are like the parents she never had, what with them spoiling her with all the food they give and teaching her how to bake. Customers even tell Marinette all the time that she looks strikingly similar to Sabine, but she doesn’t see it.

In truth, she’s only ever even thought about becoming a designer because of the Dupain-Chengs, and if it weren’t for their motivation, she’s sure that she would be in a much different place right now.

But that’s not what Marinette worries about right now. Despite school ending early and the bakery being right across the street from where she is, she still manages to be late.

She exchanges a quick goodbye with Alya, who chuckles at her frazzled state, and dashes off towards work.

“I’m here!” she shouts, running into the bakery, the familiar jingle of the store’s door’s bell ringing in her ears. “Sorry!

Sabine laughs as she hands a box of pastries to a customer, waving as they leave. “Just on time. Hello Marinette,”  

Marinette winces as Sabine holds out her apron. “Sorry again, Sabine!”

Tom laughs from the kitchen behind the store, the sound booming through the bakery. “Marinette!”

“Tom!” Marinette says back, her lips curving into a smile.

Sabine eyes Marinette as she ties the apron behind her, quickly joining the older woman behind the counter.

“So?” she asks. “What’s new with you?”

Marinette sighs. “Not much, not much...oh! Madame Rossi has an embassy gathering to welcome a couple of famous people into France. And not just any people, people who work in the fashion industry!”

Sabine nods, smiling at Marinette’s delight. “And why exactly are these people coming?”

“It’s for the Gabriel event. I don’t know when it is, but apparently Gabriel Agreste is holding a huge gala, something about searching for a fashion assistant?,”

Sabine perks up at fashion assistant. “Marinette, you should enter!”

Marinette gasps. “I couldn’t! There’s no way! I mean, my designs are barely adequate, let alone Agreste worthy!”

Sabine shakes her head. “Everyone knows that isn’t true. Don’t put yourself down like that!”

Marinette blushes. “Thanks Sabine,”

The woman smiles. “Well, anyways, are you allowed to go to the embassy event? It’s a great opportunity, you wouldn’t want to miss it,”

“I mean, Madame Rossi did invite me and Lila, but Lila spilled a bunch of coffee on the carpet, and cracked the dining table this morning. It’s all a stunt, she did it on purpose. She’s blaming it on me, which means I’ll get grounded, and I won’t be able to go, and you know there’s nothing I can do about that,”

Sabine sighs, placing a hand on Marinette’s shoulder. “Oh dear. The next time I see Lila, I’ll tell Tom to get that girl and her mother arrested!”

Marinette laughs. “As much as I’d like that, where would I live?”

The rumble of the oven from behind the store dies down, and Tom walks into the main room. The room seems friendlier all at once, his large personality filling the space.

“Here, with us,” he declares proudly. “You’re like a daughter already,”

Marinette giggles, her cheeks growing red. “Alright guys, we’ll see,”

Sabine and Tom laugh as Marinette runs away to help a customer. Their afternoons with Marinette pass by quickly, and while they wish it was longer, you know what they say: time flies when you're having fun.

By the time Marinette gets off her shift, it’s 5:30 in the evening. Paris’s sky starts to fade from its normal cotton-candy blue to a marmalade orange. The hustle and bustle of the busy streets start to die down, and once she texts her address to Alya, Marinette makes her way to the bus stop.

While her time in the bakery is her favorite time of day, her time on the bus doesn’t prove to be too bad either. She likes the quiet silence, and enjoys her time away from the world around her.

The bus is probably her favorite mode of transportation (but her only one as well). When she volunteered to work at the bakery after school, Madame Rossi decided that ‘the streets were too dark at night for Marinette to walk alone’, and she was given a bus pass.

It was a small and random act of kindness that Marinette wouldn’t ever get again. It was also the only gift she ever got from her adopted mother, and despite not being too fond of Madame Rossi, she did treasure the gift.

Madame Rossi paid for her bus rides until Marinette was actually hired at the bakery. It was then that she decided to have Marinette pay her own bills, an action that most certainly helped Marinette for the future.

The sound of tires skidding against the pathway jolts Marinette out of her thoughts. She turns to see her normal bus waiting in front of her, and grabbing her bus pas, waits in line behind a couple others to get on.

That is, until she sees what’s about to happen.

Marinette watches as a man across the street tries to cross. He’s old, as his grayed hair and aged face tells, but his most identifiable quality is the red Hawaiian shirt he wears, embossed with a white hibiscus floral pattern.

Besides that, there’s also a car coming straight for him, and though it’s a little while away, there’s no doubt that he’ll get hit.

Marinette does the only thing she can think of. She runs.

The street is narrow, and Marinette manages to pull the man across the pathway before the car comes. She huffs, turning to the man to smile.

He has an odd look in his eyes, lips curved into a mysterious smile as Marinette quirks her eyebrow.

“Thank you, young lady,” he nods.

“You’re welcome!” she smiles, turning to look at the bus, which has started leaving. “Goodbye and stay safe, sir!”

The old man watches as Marinette just manages to catch the bus, stopping it and shouldering her backpack as she climbs on.

Marinette seats herself as the bus starts once more, and turns to her window to look for the old man.

But by the time she does, he’s gone.

Alya gets to Marinette's house at just the right time. When she reaches, Marinette has done a couple of her chores, cleaned up the living room, and put out the carpet in the first floor bathroom. Against the white rug, the coffee stain is obvious, and Marinette sighs as she inspects it.

How were they ever going to get it out?

There’s a knock at the front door, and Marinette knows it’s Alya. Smiling, the girl heads to the living room to open it.

Alya gasps as she sees the house. From the marble kitchen to the hickory-brown wood flooring, everything is pristine and clean, as if the Rossis live in a mansion.

(They don’t, but the house is still fairly big. Marinette sometimes has to clean it all as part of her chores, but luckily that hasn’t happened in a while.)

“Dang girl,” Alya sighs, “you rich or what?”

Marinette nervously laughs, cracking her knuckles. “Uh, I don’t know,”

“I’m joking,” Alya smiles. “But, random thing, where’s Lila?”

“She’s out. Doctor’s appointment for her, um, wrist,”

“Aw, that’s too bad. Tell her I said get better soon!”

Marinette sighs. She doesn’t like lying, but it’s far better than what would happen if she told the truth.

“Yea. Anyway, how are you getting the stain out? I tried all morning, but it was stuck,”

“Just watch me, girl,” Alya smirks. “Before we start though, you already blotted the stain,right?”

Marinette furrows her eyebrows. “Blotted? What do you mean?”

Alya demonstrates with her hands. “Like, did you take a paper towel and try to get as much of the stain out as you could?”

Marinette nods. “Yeah, that’s why I was late this morning,”

Alya nods. “Ok, so now we just have to make the cleaner,”

Marinette raises an eyebrow. “Make? This is getting a little crazy,”

“It’s really not,” Alya laughs, “I’ve done this a thousand times before. My sisters knock over my dad’s coffee way too much,”

Marinette laughs. “Alright then, show me what to do,”

Alya makes her way to the kitchen, filing through multiple cabinets. “Where’s your dish soap?”

“Bottom-left drawer next to the sink,” Marinette points.

“And your white vinegar?”

“Fridge. Anything else you need?”

“Just water,” Alya replies. “Warm, that is. And two cups of it,”

Marinette nods. “Got it,”

Alya takes out a steel bowl from one of the cabinets. “And can I use this?”

Marinette nods again. “Go ahead,”

“Great,” Alya says, pouring a spoon of dish soap followed by a spoon of vinegar. She waits for Marinette to get the water before adding that in as well, and then mixing. “That should do,”

“Work your magic then,” Marinette laughs.

“Just watch and see girl, I totally will,”

Alya finds a cleaning rag from a drawer in the island, and she runs over to the carpet. “Grab yourself a rag, Marinette, and let’s get started!”

Marinette laughs, and runs over to help. The time passes quickly, and by the time the coffee stain is gone and the carpet is dry, two hours have gone by. Their hands are sore and their legs are tired, but both can say that they had fun.

In the midst of it, Marinette almost doesn’t notice when Lila texts her.

Today

— 2 New Messages —

Lie-La 😒: open the back door

Lie-la 😒: im right by my house

Almost.

“Alya!” Marinette gasps, both sitting on the couch after the carpet was rolled back underneath the dining table. “It’s so late, don’t you have to go at 7?”

Alya tilts her head, confused. “No?”

“Oh well then I must have said it,” Marinette laughs nervously. “Yes that’s right! I’ve got work, haha. Bye!”

Marinette practically pushes Alya to the front door, while Alya looks lost and puzzled.

“Didn’t you already have work?” Alya asks.

“Yep, but gotta save up for uni right? Haha. Haha,”

Alya nods, squinting her eyes as she walks out the door.

“Um, bye? See you at school, girl,” Alya nods, quietly laughing.

“Bye!” Marinette smiles. Once Alya is farther away and out of sight, Marinette runs to open the back door. She can faintly hear the sounds of Lila’s friend’s car pulling into the driveway, so she dashes back upstairs as fast as she can. The last thing she wants to do is talk to Lila, much less be alone in a room with her.

She hopes that Lila won’t try anything while she’s in her room.

Sighing, she smiles when she stops at the attic door, and heads inside.

Before Madame Rossi found her and decided to take her in (how she came to that conclusion, Marinette would never know), the attic was all set to be Lila’s playroom. The entire room was painted pink from head to toe (even the carpet was a light shade of pink). There was a wooden wardrobe for all of Lila’s toys, and a desk with markers, painting supplies, and coloring pencils galore.

But then Marinette came along.

For one reason or another, she was given the attic as her own room. Out went the ideas of toys and tents in the room, and in came Marinette.

Madame Rossi didn’t give her anything. From the age of 2 till the age of 4, she slept on the ground, the lack of a bed present to her each night.

Until Lila outgrew her bed of course, which was then given to Marinette.

It was simple. Since Marinette was smaller than Lila, and slower at growing, she was often given Lila’s old things. All the clothes that Lila didn’t want, Marinette had. From her bed to the old beanbag in her room (one of the only things Lila gave her as decoration) everything was a hand me down from Lila herself.

Marinette sighs, and then flops into the bed. She’s lucky that Lila doesn’t bother if Marinette doesn’t get on her nerves.

Hopefully, until she can get out of this place, she’ll manage without angering Lila too much.

Standing up, Marinette locks herself in the attic, a faint click of the door behind her, and gets out her phone. Opening up Spotify, she starts her playlist, and goes over to the desk.

For the next hour, she does homework and finishes a project, all while sketching out designs for new dresses.

And hey, if she’s lucky, she might just be able to make one for the gala.

Marinette shuffles through her desk drawers, pop music playing through her earbuds. It’s nearly 8 PM and she’s searching for the special gold thread she had bought a couple weeks ago. It cost nearly a month's pay, and she’s been saving it for a special occasion.

With the dress she was sketching, she wanted to know if it was now.

She’s still searching through the drawers on the left side of the desk when she finds a box.

One that she feels might not have been there before.

(Then again, she rarely looks through all her drawers, so there’s always a chance that it could’ve been.)

Marinette feels confused. The box is made of a dark brown wood, and shaped like an octagon. The top of the box is embossed with a red design. Glimmering red circles meet wavy, thin lines, but Marinette is preoccupied with figuring out what the box is for.

In the end, she decides to open it. There can’t be much inside, can there?

Turns out, Marinette is wrong.

The moment she opens it is a frightful one. In that second, there’s a bright flash of light. It swirls around her as Marinette gasps, dropping the box onto the carpet as two solid-black earrings fall out.

That’s not the amazing part of it all though. After a second, Marinette comes face to face with a spotted red creature.

Needless to say, she screams.

“Hi Marinette!” the spotted creature says. “My name is Tikki! It’s nice to meet you!”

“Mouse!” Marinette hollers, “Bug! Bug-mouse! Talking bug mouse!”

Marinette scooches back, her hand grabbing books and papers off her desk as she throws them at Tikki.

“I’m here to help!” Tikki says, dodging the objects. “I’m here to help you!”

“Liar!” Marinette calls, searching for more things to throw. “This must be Lila’s version of a joke ! I can’t believe her!”

She takes her water-bottle from her backpack, and quickly moves to trap Tikki in it.

“It’s ok Marinette, I won’t hurt you,” Tikki smiles. “But if this makes you feel better, then this is ok!”

There’s a pause, and then Marinette sighs and chooses not to answer, leaning back, and quickly grabbing her school tablet off her desk. She points it at Tikki, trying her best to look intimidating.

“Who are you?” Marinette asks, “and what do you want?”

“Like I said, my name’s Tikki! I’m a kwami!” the tiny bug says, (still trapped in the bottle but floating in midair, Marinette notes) “And I want to help you!”

Marinette sighs, lowering her weapon tablet. “Did Lila send you somehow?”

Tikki furrows her forehead in place of her eyebrows. “No? Who’s Lila?”

Marinette bitterly chuckles, standing and throwing her arms into the air. “This. This. This is why you can’t help me. No one can. Anyone who meets Lila thinks she’s an ‘absolute angel’, and no one else knows her. How is someone supposed to help me if no one knows that my problem exists?!”

“Marinette,” Tikki sighs, “I promise you, I can help, if you’ll listen to me. Please let me explain, and then you can decide if you want to trust me or not, ok?”

Marinette pauses, considering the situation, and sits a fair distance away from Tikki, keeping her tablet in her hands.

“Ok,” she responds, facing the little bug. “But you have 5 minutes,”

Tikki smiles again. "And that's all I need,"

quick links: < previous chapter | first chapter | next chapter >

a/n: i resolve to post the next chapter soon lmaoo, thanks for reading! have an absolutely amazing day, you deserve it! 

taglist:

i’ll be tagging the people that i had tagged before, along with a couple others who liked the previous chapter for this series. if you don’t want to get tagged, i’m very sorry! just shoot me a private message, and i’ll take you off the tags. if you do want to get tagged, just tell me with a private message or an ask and i’ll add you to the taglist. thank you!

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#ml #mlb #fanfic #marinette-dupain cheng #miraculous ladybug #miraculous #adrien agreste #adrienette #adrinette #nino lahiffe #alya cesaire #lila rossi #lila rossi bashing #lila #lila exposed #lila rossi tag #marinette tag #crimson and bluebell

[dontasktheradiodemon]

Gardens #2 (1/6/2021)

Click here if you’re like “What the heck is this about?”

Two chats today because I forgot to post one yesterday!

Angel @sluttyspiderpolkacock catches up with Madame @usedhearts after his abrupt arrival from Hell. He talks to her about his hopes to get away from Valentino and she offers support.

Madame

The gardens had drawn her away from the beach-- as much as she loved the sea, she missed this. She missed life, growing and sprawling, curated into beauty.

Madame sat at the fountain, her tentacles trailing in the water as she admired the plants. It was different from how she remembered Earth's flora, but it was flora all the same, and she loved it.

She adjusted her top, still in her bikini but with an added sarong around her hips, and leaned to smell a flower. "It's so lovely here," She muttered to herself.

Angel

" Big Mama, ya up here, too? " It was easy to see her, towering over the bushes and gracing the flowering vines from the trees, despite being seated. Angel's own willowy form almost could've passed for a foxtail.

He wove through her tentacles to come see her. " Valera's e'ry bit the butterfly, ain't they? " Arms in a welcoming spread, he flashed her a bright smile. " It's good t' see ya ~ "

Madame

Her head turned when she heard him and her face brightened into a beaming smile.

"Oh, Angel, darlin'! I'm so glad t' see ya, c'mere 'n give Mama a hug." A tentacle caught him around the waist to pull him into her arms, too excited to let him walk the rest of the way to her. She wrapped her arms around him and smooched the side of his face.

"Thought you'd be at that shindig with Big V. How'd you sneak away, sweetheart?" She held his face gently in one hand, gently stroking his cheek with her thumb.

Angel

Angel smiled sweetly, giddy and the smallest bit shy with her affections but welcoming them with a tight hug in all his arms.

" I just got m'self a lil break, no biggie! They'll survive wit'out me just fine! They got Babygirl Paps an' the fluff girls takin' care a e'ryone. It's time the newbies got a chance t' shine, don't'cha think? "

His smile grew wide with an affectionate lean of his cheek. She was hitting JUST the spot and he was becoming PUTTY in her hands.

Madame

"Yeah, suppose yer right about that-- them new girls gotta learn sometime!" She laughed, taking one of Angel's hands and gently guiding him to sit next to her.

"Well, c'mon then, take a seat, get off ya gams, and tell me everythin'. How're ya, shug? How ya been likin' this whole palace we got to explore? Pretty schnazzy if ya ask me." She winked and very, very gently poked him with her elbow-- didn't want to hurt him, after all.

Angel

He almost fell off balance as her hand left his cheek and led him to his seat.

" I ain't seen e'rythin', but it's pretty fuckin' nice, " he said simply with a dip of his fingers into the fountain ( for no particular reason whatsoever ) , " I been workin' my ass into the ground all season. Everyday a huge fuckin' clusterfuck a shoots an' appointments... " Angel gave a roll of all his eyes as he mocked the tone of Valentino's voice.

" _Gotta churn out that fresh content, Angel Cakes ~ Camera ain't gonna eye - fuck itself, Angie Baby ~ If I don't see a chicken supreme in my office in five I'm gonna throw a BITCH FIT... SUMMER._ 'Cause y'know, he don't like me doin' the food runs. "

Madame

Her eyes roll at the Valentino impression. Yeah, that sounded like him. Madame shook her head, her large hand wrapping around Angel, rubbing his back.

"Course he don't want ya doin' the food runs-- fuckin' idiot thinks if he starves his workers, they'll look better when all it really does is make 'em give subpar work. How ya gonna entertain a John if ya really wanna just eat his burger insteada his dick?" She laughed, her head shaking again.

"Angel, darlin', he ever send ya out ta run an errand, come to me 'n I'll get a meal in ya. My babes ain't gonna starve on my watch-- can't rightly let 'em, breaks my poor Southern heart." She looked off into the distance and closed her eyes, wiping away a pretend tear.

Angel

Angel giggled and covered his mouth with a sly aversion of his eyes. " Y'know... sometimes dick be temptin'... " A snort, and his arms wildly fanned.

" I didn' even GAIN THAT MUCH! " he continued, " I ain't e'en said nothin' about livin' up the hotel and downin' everythin' Alastor whips like a fuckin, GARBAGE DISPOSAL, NO! I just go to Cherri's, post ONE picture, ONE TIME, of the CUTEST FUCKIN' DONUT...! "

Oh he was full on venting, now. He held up a finger and dug through his fluff a hot second. " An' he sends me THIS! " There he had it, The Book. " What kin'a palooka e'en uses these anymore?? Ya THINK he'd fuckin', hire a nutritionist or some shit who moonlights as a hitman, or some shit. He HAS the FUCKIN' MONEY! I KNOW! 'CAUSE I'M OUT THERE MAKIN' IT FA 'IM! "

He then collapsed into Madame's chest, still muttering but full tuckered out, arms limp. " _I'ma fuckin' kill 'im..._ " **Did he say that out loud?**

Madame

Madame listened to everything, watched every flail of arms, intently. Poor boy. It was a tough gig, being Valentino's prized pet. She honestly thought she'd taught him better, but he was always on about how he already knew the business, knew how to handle people. Obvsiously not, with how Angel was going on.

Her arms wrap around him when he falls forward-- a chest this big had many uses, pillows being one of the best in her opinion. Madame gathered him close, going so far as to pick him up and cradle him against her chest.

"Aww, honeybunch. I know just how ya feelin'. Valentino....well, he's an asshole. Head so far up his ass he eatin' his own shit fer breakfast." She shook her head, rocking Angel a bit, like one would a child who'd had a nightmare. She hums softly, an old lullaby her mother used to sing, way back when. She kept that up for a few moments before falling silent. The silence hung between them before she spoke, voice low.

"If'in you did kill him, I wouldn't blame ya, honey. There'd be no love lost between me'n him. I'd support ya claim to that throne, if'n you wanted it. In Hell, ya learn ta balance the cruelty with the kindness, and if ya can't find that balance, well, then, ya deserve to reap what ya sow. And Valentino's sewn a whole lotta hate down there. Karma's a bitch, even for the dead, and all I'd say would be 'good riddance'. You deserve so much more'n him, 'n so much more'n he gives ya. Yer the star and you deserve to be treated like one."

A tentacle scooted under his chin, tilting his head up so she could look at his face.

"You remember Mama's in ya corner, alright, Angel? I'm rootin' for ya. And my arms and doors're always open for ya."

Angel

His eyes blew wide and cornerless, staring not at Madame but at a far off, intangible point behind her. It never really occured to him just how impactful erasing Valentino's existence from Hell would _be._ All he found himself stuck on was getting it _done,_ losing himself in the possession of madness and the mindsets of cornered prey whenever he acted.

Angel didn't want to inherit the empire. Having the responsibility of so many souls under his care wasn't something he ever thought suited him. Protecting his peers on the streets was one thing, so was taking demons of all walks of life temporarily under his wing until they could fly on their own. _Management_ was another. Keeping souls in _line_ was another. He always thought himself the soldier, the weapon, the right hand, the poster boy of the wall supporting his image. An _Overlord_ of his own right...? The closest he'd come to it was before he partnered with him, fresh into demonhood, throwing his power and whims wherever he wished...

_But claiming Valentino's head would **do** that to him, wouldn't it?_ He'd inherit his power, his enemies, new enemies out of his allies... Angel's head began to spin. This was the nature of Hell. _Endless tiers of suffering._ All he wanted was his freedom... _How much was too high a price to pay...?_ He'd be fighting Valentino's battles _long_ after he was gone...

" That was, uh... " he said in an uncharacteristically small voice, " ... a fig're a speech... He's good t' me... really... " Angel bit his lip, eyes meeting her now that he'd processed all she had to say to him. Madame and Valentino sure had _history..._ and if Angel learned anything from his partnership with him... _it must've ROTTED to the very CORE._ They had this in common and he could feel it in her voice.

He trusted her. He knew he could. But maybe he didn't have to use it... not QUITE yet...

A warm, genuine smile bloomed over his face and he took her hands. " I will, " he promised with a binding kiss between her aligned pointer fingers, " Ya have my word, I love ya club an' what'cha doin' wit' it... I'll... " _Meet you in the middle._ " I'll... come aroun' some more. Maybe a performance or two would make 'im nervous enough t' give me next holiday off, ah? "

Angel laughed, knowing that chance was slimmer than his waistline after routine removals of his floating ribs. It _would_ be _nice_ not to have to work Valentine's Day...

" Thanks... fa hearin' me out... " he said sweetly, subtly off the edge of a choke, " The grind don't stop, an' it gets pretty fuckin'... MUCH... "

Madame

"That's right, baby, the grind don't stop, but Mama's here for you." Her tentacles moved around, and she used them to cradle Angel instead of her arms, freeing them up to hold one of his set of hands.

"Now, you listen to Mama, alright? I know Big V better'n anyone around. Raised him in Hell myself, and he shames me every day, the way he acts. I know his temper, his vices, I know it all, Angel. And darlin'? He ain't never treated no one right since the moment he landed ass over tea kettle in Hell. Probably long 'fore that too, considerin' he landed in Hell in the first place. I know the sorts a things he tries to pull..."

She took a deep breath, and leaned down, her tentacles lifting Angel higher. She pressed her forehead to his, and took his face in her hands, her voice lowering as her throat tightened.

"Next time he tries anythin'-- _anythin' at all_-- you come to me, Angel. I know yer a big boy, I know you can handle yerself, but it breaks my heart to know you're there with him, every day. It honestly truly does. Bein' Val's favorite is a hard life, or unlife, I suppose, but just know Mama's got ya back. I'd sooner slap that grin off his face and grind that stupid hat a his inta the dust than see ya hurtin' cause a him. I know it can be hard to accept help, but I do want ya ta know that it's there, if'n ya need to accept it, alright?"

She sniffled as she straightened up, using both her hands and tentacles to hold him close. "You're my boy, Angel, I love ya like my own. We ain't blood, but what's blood ever done for anyone? We better'n blood, we're family, got it?"

Angel

_Oh the tears._ They were coming. She already knew what he was keeping safely lodged in his throat. It saved him from having to admit ANYTHING while making it crystal clear to him that she had just what he needed, and was willing to give it to him.

But for NOTHING in return...? Angel closed his eyes and nuzzled into her forehead as the tears beaded off the long length of his lashes. Behind his eyes were the memories branded into his skull, words insisting that there was no such THING as the sentiments he found himself faced with. _With every sanction, there was a CATCH. With every favor, a FEE to be repaid twice over._

He fought them with the help of her every word.

" G... got it, " he choked, " I got it. I won't let'cha down... " A small sniffle. Angel's emotions flowed, but they were soothed and much more contained than they were when he was alone. It was becoming clearer and clearer now that he was in the company of trust.

He found traction in her tentacles and allowed her to support him, the tight pressure of the coils feeling more like safety than constriction. Perhaps, he really could survive post extermination Hell...

" I, uh... " Angel swallowed thickly. " ... Blew the top floor window... b'fore I took off... I dunno if any angels got in, but... he 'ad t' deal wit' 'em... "

Madame

She lifted a hand to wipe away a couple tears before they could fall-- she was wearing waterproof make up, as she always did, thank fuck. Madame pressed a kiss to his forehead, and held him.

Until he said that. She blinked and looked down at him, shock clear on her face for the moment or two it took her to process what he said. And then she burst out laughing. Her entire body shook with it, loud cackles that rose into the air.

"Oh fuck, oh god, Angel! Baby, you're a fuckin' riot! Did ya really? Just broke through the damn window? Damn, shug, ya know how ta make an exit!" She laughed again, Angel pressed against her chest.

"Oh, honey, ya ain't hurt, are ya? No scratches, gashes? I mean, ya looked tip top when ya walked up, but that fur a yours hides a lot. Anything ya need Mama ta look at?"

Angel

He chuckled sheepishly with a comical bump along the waves of her laughter. Despite how afraid he initially was to return, it must've been HILARIOUS from Madame's point of view. It eased him some.

" Nah, nah! I'm fine! I think...? Uh... " Angel did a quick survey of himself. Valera might've brushed out the last of the glass from his fluff already. Enough of the alcohol wore off for him to have felt any stinging by now ( he was PRETTY sure. )

" Yeah! I think I'm good, thanks ~ " he assured, " I take color real easy so if I'm bleedin' , it SHOWS. BRIGHT an' hot pink ~ " He took a little too much pride in that.

Madame

"Oh, fancy Mister Pink Blood over here," She said, still giggling a bit. "Mine's blue, if'n you were wonderin'."

Madame took a deep breath, rocking him in her arms again, just on instinct.

"God, I'd pay a million bucks ta have seen the look on Valentino's face when ya did that. Serves him right. An Angel lead the angels to him!" She started laughing again, devolving into softer giggles after a few moments.

"How's everthin' else, though? Ya feelin' alright? Ya body's fine, but wanna make sure my boy's doin' good."

Angel

" It shows up pretty in pictures, is all ~ " he said casually, " Bloodplay photosets always turn out real good. " He then casually reclined along a tentacle and drew idle circles in the fountain to watch the calming ripples.

" Think... e'rythin's ok... " he mused, " Just really needed not t' work the Extermination pa'ty an' just... chill out some. " He scrutinized his own reflection in the water for clues. Not much else came to his mind from the massive shadow his immediate issues casted over them.

Madame

"Alright, if that's it...." She trailed off, two of her tentacles peeling off to plop into the fountain as she leaned back.

"Y'know I hadn't even seen the ocean since I was a young'n? Hadn't swam in it fer longer'n that, too. I'm....so thankful to Valera fer invitin' me. Not only do I get to not worry about the Extermination-- at least as much, but I get to enjoy somethin' I missed fer so, so long."

She gave Angel a squeeze. "And now my boy's here'n safe 'n sound. Nothin' better to relax an ol' ladies' heart."

Madame smiled down at him. "Everythin' will be fine, Angel. We may be in Hell mosta the time, but this right here?" She gestured to the plants around them. "This all is proof that we ain't always there. Even in our hearts'n minds, when we there physically, we aren't always in Hell. There's a sayin': Hell is other people. But I think Heaven can be, too. If ya got the right people around..."

Angel

Angel wrinkled his nose. " Heaven's a load a bullshit. All of it, " he said cynically, " Ya condemned, ya condemned. Ain't no POINT in tryn'a make nice wit' the fuckin' feathery DOUCHEBAG brigade lookin' t' ERASE US e'ery fuckin' YEAR. " The words came from his gut. He wasn't hiding any hidden hopes or dreams. " Ya really think a place that commits annual fuckin' genocide a sinner's where it's at? A thing to LOOK FOR IN PEOPLE? It's a fuckin' fairytail, the fuckin' shit they tell us t' be believin' about Heaven, _**Mamina...**_ "

The last endearment rolled off his tongue like a plea. _ Don't try t' sell me anythin' I'm never gonna have..._ " Ya know I fuckin' - RAN, from the party. I ran from the fuckin' studio too. Hotel ain't gonna save me wit' their redemption prayers. Just... gonna put a lil' pause on the sufferin' awhile. Like 'ere. It's just a break. After this, it's Hellhole Sweet Hellhole all over again 'til the next time we're at our wit's en'. That's all there is, that's I got. " Angel sat up from his recline so he could look Madame in the face. " ... E'en if I got you. I don't mean it like anythin' ya do don't matter, but... y'know... " He sprawled his hands defeatedly as his words failed him, and his face fell into a bittersweet anguish. It seemed some things were completely beyond even his imagination.

Madame

Her face only softened as he spoke, and her heart ached for him. Oh, this poor thing, tossed about by life and then by Hell, it was no wonder to her that he was so cynical.

"Angel, darlin'," She said, after he finished his rant, her hands moving to ever so gently hold his face between them. Madame let out a long, slow sigh, staring into his eyes with the sweetest, most motherly expression she could.

"Call me an optimist, but I'd like to think that livin' over a century in Hell has taught me one thing: even Hell can have some sweetness. Sure, we all sinners'n demons down here-- or there, but that don't mean there ain't still decent folk who'd treat ya right down there. That Princess for one, she's a good egg, startin' up that Hotel may not get the results she's lookin' for, but it can help. She wants to change things, and I don't blame her.

"Hell is Hell, it's true. Heaven ain't no picnic either, but I think ya missed my point, shug-- When I say that Heaven can be other people, I ain't meanin' the feathery bastards that come down ta kill us every year, or even the fuckin' cunts that live up in them clouds and send 'em down. I'm meanin' the _concept_ what ya learned in Sunday school. What Heaven is _supposed_ to be. It's supposed to be a place where ya surrounded by people that love you and that ya love too. And if we can find those kinds of people, even in Hell? Well, that's a bit of a miracle in my books.

"So no, Hell ain't never gonna be Heaven and thank fuck fer that, cause I think Heaven's prolly borin' as shit compared to the fun we can have in Hell. I'd rather run a cabaret in Hell than lay around bored as sin in Heaven any day. But what I'm tryin' to say is that, if ya got good people around ya, then things'll get better. Hell, honestly, ain't been no different from life up above, fer me. Ya gotta make the most of what ya got, honeybunch."

She pressed a kiss to his face, her lips covering half of it when she did. "That make sense, darlin'?"

Angel

" Yeah. Total sense. " Angel deadpanned into the rosebush behind her. " First rule t' makin' it in Hell's bein' an Overlord or the fuckin' Princess, " he replied caustically. It didn't seem like she was going to understand or stop lecturing until he relented one way or another. But if Madame was Hell bent on teaching him something, he had to let her know he wasn't a CHILD that could be sold far off dreams when he was preoccupied with spending his every waking moment surviving the present.

" I _know_ there's sweetness in Hell. Dealin' sugar's my JOB. Makin' the most outta the scrap I got doesn't give me time ta KID. " He got up and started pacing the pavement, cigarette in his teeth and a light in his claws. " First thin's first, get outta Big V's horseshit. If it don't kill me, THEN I can see what I can do about gettin' a fuckin' life preached to me by a sister who fuckin' rapped my ass every Sunday. " A puff of red hearts whisked into the sky. He couldn't bring himself to buy a thing she said past offering to help him if he needed a place to be. The crystal clear promise of security was the only thing that made sense to him and as he was, he had no place for faith.

Madame

Her expression didn't change, even when Angel got up and started pacing. It was alright-- he wasn't ready, in his heart, to hear what she said, and that was okay.

"It's good to have priorities, shug. Glad ya got that shit figured out. I don't mean to preach, just speakin' my own truth, Angel. If ya don't wanna hear it, well, then, I'll shut my yapper 'n we can just enjoy the respite we get here, yeah?" She took a deep breath and swirled a hand through the water.

"Just want ya t'be happy, sweetheart. Like any Mama would. Just cause we in Hell doesn't change my heart."

Angel

" I appreciate what ya sayin', Big Mama, " he sighed through curls of crimson escaping from the valleys of pointed teeth, " It just ain' it fa me. I 'ad to lie, scrap, and _fuck_ m'way to where I am now. I don't... _got_ the means t' be thinkin' a what it'd be like to not have to. I don't 'ave the POWER - I mean, maybe, I _USED TO,_ but... "

Angel looked around. He couldn't imagine littering the pristine garden with his ash, so he kept the butt on hand. " ... I gave it away. Fa this. Fa... " _He could say this to her, right?_ " ... Fa HIM. Before... it all got to 'is head an' before I knew it, I wasn' it anymore. He was chasin' more an' more power, the kind I gave up. So it's gonna... _TAKE..._ s'more lyin', fuckin', an' scrappin' before I get anywhere else. Until he could look me in the fuckin' eye an' SEE... how BAD. He fucked. Up. "

Madame

She nodded along with him, knowing those words well, knowing that feeling. "I getcha, baby, I getcha. Don't need to explain none to me about shit like that. I understand, babydoll, I do."

Madame reached over, gently taking his hand in hers, drawing him back to sit next to her again. "Ya got a smoke ta spare, Angel? Mama's got a cravin'."

She let out a sigh, and glanced out over the garden. "If'n ya need to talk about it though, I'll listen, Angel. No one'd understand better'n me, yeah? I know Vee better'n anyone cept maybe you 'n possibly the other two Vees. So ya need to vent? Just rant ya head off? I can listen. I know how much that can help sometimes."

Angel

" That - ... That's it, " he said calmly, starting to feel more comfortable in the stimulants soothing his system, " Ye... yeah, I... " Angel procured his case and flipped it open for her to browse, allowing his head to lean against her shoulder. The light off the pink crystal seqins sparkled in the water.

" He's... gonna pay. An' I'm gonna collect. That's all I got an' all that matters. Until I do that, ain't nothin' in the shithole that's gonna be up fa my takin'. " He put out his cigarette on the empty side of the case and fixed himself another. That could do for now. " _C'est la CAZZO vie._ "

Madame

Madame looked over his selection and took one. She waited until he lit his next and leaned in to light hers off it. She took a long drag, blowing the smoke out-- no shapes like Valentino's, just a cloud, the way she preferred it.

"Sure is, Angel, sure is. I'll be there ta have ya back, though." She ruffled his hair affectionately. "Mama's in ya corner, and don't forget it."

Angel

_That_ was the reassurance he needed, something concrete he could trust in. " Never, " he affirmed sternly as if his voice wrote a contract in the smoke, " I got that, ain't much I couldn't do. " Snapping the case closed, he lounged against her and looked up into the sky, redless save for the dissipating shapes they blew. For the moment, he really felt like he'd be ok.

Madame

Her hand moved to the back of his head, giving him some gentle scritches as she held him close.

"Got any ideas fer an act ya'd wanna do at the cabaret? Anythin' ya wanna do that ya hadn't got to before?"

Angel

" Zorita 'ad some shit goin' on, " he said immediately through brightened eyes, " Dunno if I could really pull it OFF, but the SHOWS were real fuckin'... _choice ~_ "

His arms then got animated, slicing and molding the air around his thoughts as he brainstormed.

" I got chances to try a lotta thin's, but only the one time it'd take fa Big V t' decide it wasn't worth gettin' me into when the pole was just as good an easier t' maintain. If I got back to anythin'... I think I'd wanna do the ring... "

Madame

"The ring, eh?" She smirked, giving a nod. "That's a fun one, fer sure. What about the ribbons? He ever let ya do those? The things soma the girls can do...."

Angel

" Ribbons? The ones on the sticks? " He racked his head through the years. " Huh... no... I don't think so... Unless the prop's somethin' I'm wearin' an' can throw, he thought it a waste a time. I tried t' pitch 'im the idea a dancin' wit' 'em in nude if I could keep a trailin' ribbon over my junk the whole time, but he didn' believe me, " he explained, snickering, " I could TOTALLY pull it off if he gave me the time! _His loss ~_ "

Madame

"No, no, the ones hangin' from the ceilin'! It's like the ring but, y'know, big ol' ribbons a cloth. Some circus level shit, but damn, if it ain't pretty." She laughed, shrugging.

"Think ya'd look real pretty danglin' up high from all a them."

Angel

He blew a raspberry, a storm of popping hearts spraying over the fountain. _Can't take that image back NOW -_

" Oh, silks, yeah, I TOTALLY knew what ya were talkin' about, " he said between giggles, " Yeah, I done those once or twice. It came pretty easy, I dunno, an' it was lotta fun, but y'know Big V... "

Angel then put a pair of free hands to his head to mimic feelers. " _They wanna see ya ASS, Angel Cakes,_ " he mocked.

Madame

Madame laughed, shaking her head. "Fuck, ya got that down, don'tcha?" She shrugged.

"Valentino's always been shortsighted about these things. If ya _always_ give em what they want, then there ain't no reason fer them to be tantalized! Can't give 'em all a it up front, ya gotta _tease~_" She gave her chest a little shake and winked at Angel.

"But acourse you know what I'm talkin' 'bout, don'tcha, Angel?"

Angel

" Probably more than HE DOES, " he joked with a mirroring preen of his own chest, " He's all about that fast money, but he ain't got NO. IDEA. How far ya can stretch the bucks. LEMME TELL YA! "

Angel excitedly straddled the edge of the fountain to face her. " The LONGER ya can edge a John, the more he's gonna give ya. Physically, emotionally, all of it. Big V deadass for - fuckin' - GOT that there's more t' hustlin' than _wham, bam, thank you ma'am_ - 'in it out. Time he trade in those goofy fuckin 'eart shades fa dollar signs, ya'd THINK! "

Madame

"Oh, I know, honeybunch, I _know_. It's all about the tease! All about the tantalizin'. Give 'em just enough to keep 'em comin' back fer more 'n more!" She laughed, winking at him.

"Big V's lost sight a that, he's too preoccupied with shittin' out content fer Vox that he fergot the biggest money maker in th' game." Her smile turned sly as she looked at Angel.

"But I never fergot that. That's why I lasted this long, and why I'll keep lastin'."

Angel

" Time's up, ah? He sells fuckin' Voot Floops fa $666 an they taste like FUCKIN' ASS! I WOULD KNOW! " he joked as he toyed with his case, " Ain't nothin' in 'em either, just THE emptiest shit there is t' be eatin'. Fa like a week? Month? Fuck I know, but it was all we 'ad in the studio breakroom an' I swear ta FUCK I always en'ed up HUNGRIER than before I ATE 'EM. "

He then opened up his case and started rolling some more cigarettes. " Wonder when someone's gonna tell 'im his new boyfrien's fuckin' _STUPID..._ " A sly smile. " He ain't got nothin' on ya, yeah? Could _you_ get away with it? " Angel chuckled, " Not too 'arshly, though! I ain't about t' be feelin' bad fa his new squeeze... unless... _he's got a cravin' fa spider..._ "

Madame

She snorted. "I _could_ but don't mean I _would_. I ain't about ta stir that pot like that-- besides, ya _know_ I'm a good ol' Southern Lady, and we have better ways a sayin' shit like that ta the point were people ain't even know we talkin' shit."

She placed a hand on her chest and batted her lashes. Madame deepened her accent as she spoke again. "Well bless yer heart! I ain't ever seen a bug quite as cute! Yer as adorable as a bee's wing!" She started laughing.

Angel

Angel echoed her laughter with intermittent snorts. " Ain't no gay bitches got time fa that. Our petty, impatient asses WANT ya knowin' when we're takin' ya fa a DRAG, " he joked with a wink. _Pun intended._

" That's the master plan, though ~ " he sang with a quick drag of his tongue over the end of a fresh cigarette before slipping it into the case, " Fuck 'im. Fuck 'is boyfriend. THEN fuck over 'is whole ass life. Shit ~ "

Madame

"Sounds like a plan, shug. Sounds like a plan, indeed." She chuckled. "Just know I can't take _direct_ action in ruinin' Big V's shit. I'll support ya, but I can't get involved with my own tentacles-- plus, I mean, Val'd smell that a mile off, so's best I keep to the background, fer all our sakes. It he breaks our deal first, then I'd have free reign to help ya more directly, though."

Angel

" Yeah yeah, ya don't gotta, " he assured, " I ain't plannin' on involvin' or takin' no one down wit' me. Promise. No one better take this from me, either, but... What, kin'a deal ya got goin' wit' 'im? "

Madame

"Ain't nothin' fancy, basic sorta non-interference thing. I don't mess with his business directly, he don't mess with mine. Mostly keeps us outta each other's hair-- but poachin' talent is fair game, which is why I can offer ya protection 'n such." She smirked and winked again.

Angel

" _Nice_ loopholin' ~ " he sang, " No wonder ya been sittin' pretty all this time, Big Mama. Save a spot fa me an' I'll be the prettiest throne candy anyone's e'er seen ~ "

Madame

"Deal Makers gotta get those loops on lock, baby boy, and I wouldn'ta lasted this long if I weren't a damn good Deal Maker." She giggled again.

"Ever since ya started up with Big V, I had a spot primed 'n ready for ya. Knew ya were a star, baby."

Angel

" HA! " Angel gave a short, small burst of slightly embarassed laughter. " Spotlight's where I belong, Mama ~ Chargin' me rent in m'own house oughta be a _crime ~_ "

Madame

"Ain't that true, babe, ain't it true!" She laughed again. "Ya belong in it."

#extermination party palace #sluttyspiderpolkacock #usedhearts #chat log

[misterbitches]

Hello! @flootweed replying to the post from before. the long format was killing me. why does tumblr look like this...

I haven’t watched episode 8 yet...or have I? If it’s the most recent one. No.

Is the hornbill a bird? It probably is but I have a terrible memory and I’m dumb so. I skipped the last few weeks because I’m scawwed. How are you liking it? I did see someone say that the hornbill makes sense (without knowing what it is...at all) bc heart transplant patients only live like 5-15 years after but someone in those comments pointed out that he was so young when he got his and that’s pretty rare so he has a higher likelihood of survival. Frankly, this is the only way I will proceed. Since when did shows ever care about the heart transplant health? Never and it needs to stay that way!

What did we think of ep 6? LMAO. I need opinions! And omg it makes me feel special when I can point things out to people because I so...rarely get to LOL. Editing is like one of my favorite things ever so I can be super particular about it but I try to do the thing you do when you’re supposed to see if it works within its context. I’d like to go in with scissors and glue but alas. 

THe mic covering....the rustling....it’s like guys...please. Ironically the audio today wasn’t great. I don’t know why. IDK if you watch c-dramas but I am not even sure what’s worse between them because they dub their dramas. But actually no it’s best to have the dubbing because even tho it is painful they have to put a lot of effort into it. LOL. 

Right? @ Aey! It’s just weird if they would show us more about what he’s done instead of saying he’s done sth bad and not even explaining that....like you could even do some shitty exposition. I think if he is to be a true villain then we really need to be privvy. All the warnings make it seem like he’s a fuckin’ serial killer so when we get the scene of him at home it’s like....actually this is really serious? Maybe his pain is like...for a reason. Althought you won’t even TELL US WHAT HE’S DONE WRONG BESIDES BE JUST FUCKING WEIRD AND ANNOYING! So from what we have it’s just a realllllllll fucked up sad person lol. god i forgot about the dinner! and i totally agree. he really needs them to succeed. i like your theory because it would make the scene where he like blocks the twitter user make more sense. he also says they dont really know each other etc so it’s realllllyyyyy probable that he just sees it as a way out. if not then we shall pretend u wrote it :)

god yea i wouldnt say it is art but i also guess we technically have to since it is technically. in the way that technically performance artists are artists but mostly i uh technically ignore them. Also one of my fav BLs is called the best twins. If you do not know what it is I will not elaborate further.t 

i want to know more abt poli sci majors lmao but they sound DRAMATIC/ hopefully most ppl in ur cohort arent losers! 

hahahha i understand. there was just a thing on twitter about DSA and then the day before about reading discourse. the same thiings. over. and over. and over. and over. we are our own worst enemies but also our own best friends? but i hate tankies and that wont change. but hasan’s a decent guy. he said sth abt black ppl during biden’s primaries in GA or whatever and i was like chill. but he’s insecure and has adhd which means ur more open to being wrong and changing otherwise u will suffocate and die. 

and totally about hiding fuck ups. i’ve tried really hard bc of organizing IRL to like...be honest, question, etc but also like...approach it naturally? because if you’re trying to be perfect and so worried you’ll fuck up you don’t realize that puts  more stress on you, makes you seem like a robot, and could potentially not make you realize the mistkaes you made. also if we’re privileged in certain spaces there is just no possible way we won’t get something wrong. im light and i know that honestly any way to speak up on colorism is going to be difficult and that’s a space where i have power so i just have to figure it out. we should be uncomfortable because we have to sit with unpleasant feelings and sort through our own whatever. that just makes the next time even better and people can trust u more.  i think some people sweat it sooo much or maybe they think their personal life and what theyve been through is more the norm? on the other hand people can be sf reactionary in the worst way and idk what their issue is. there was also a user who said sth very inch arresting about tankies which i thoroughly enjoyed (how like violent lefitsts or tankies / ppl who are like ooh a gun whatever just want to be violent in another space so they have shit tendencies from jump and nothing of substance which i think i agree with tbh fo ra lottttt of ppl. like their anger is actually like “no im about to beat that ass” instead of what we actually want to get done) 

sort of in the same vein re: taking it easy...we coudl all be more understanding too. to slow it down like you mentioned about not being privvy to fucking eveyrthing and saying anything on our mind. i saw this person talk about y2k which was a huge deal while happening bc it was the turn of the millenium (bruh were u even alive?) but this twitter user grew up in a super super SUPER religious household and was like why do ppl make jokes about Y2K it was insanely traumatizing? though my first instinct was confused ive tried hard to like look more before i judge especially thanks to a friend of mine. turns out that with the further reading the more we found out he was just really traumatized; it was very common in religious households to be afraid of 2000. so we could have come at him with no understanding and he could have thought that everyone had the same experience with that year that he did. his feelings sit precedent though but i think it was just very hard for him to fathom. 

i didnt reply bc he didnt need that and what could i have said? he’ll see what the truth is with exposure and unfortunately this was something he really did go through. 

and that’s what makes most people think others could be over the top. because it sounded ridiculous but then it was this huge traumatic thing that we could have never known about. so maybe when someone sounds like actually crazy they have an explanation? of course some ppl are just batshit or annoying but that’s anywhere not just leftists it’ just means more i guess when a ~~librul is annoyed~ but it can be easy to want to make fun of ppl too. lmao.  basically what i am saying is the internet? especially twitter? for leftists? in this economy? bitch it’s the wild west out here.

i am 29! idk if i said it or not. i am OLD u probably werent even born in the year i was talking about wah. i know not old-old or old at all but compared to you i’m due for a colonoscopy.

omg i hope u can get vaxxed soon! are you wfh rn? i hope ur also not in a bad state as in state state not state as in ur being :| bleh what a fucking time. it sucks that you have to fucking do work. well unless u like school. which i hope u do. i just assume everyone hates it cos i did lmao

was it the lindsay ellis drama? that bitch is dumb. if there was other drama oh wait the drama i was referring to it all happened on the same day. idk book twitter that well but i saw something from someone who was abt that shit and wowie! the american people are not that.....intelligent to put it lightly.

i’ll get better. ppl tell me they miss me and im like aw. i have insanellllyyy bad insomnia and a lot of stuff happened this year HOWEVER I SLEPT FOR TWO DAYS FOR 8 HOURS AT A REASONABLE TIME. im a new woman.  anyways you too! i hope ur not too burnt out with school. we just dont know when the burnout is or we just dont know we are burnt out until we are. the panaramiciccici hit and all the things i was ignoring kind of just fell on me and sooo much happened at once. and frankly it’s hard to take care of ourselves. lord. 

Like if you aren’t interested in expanding on the issue in a way that hasn’t been done before all you gotta do it like… spread resources and donate if you can. I dont see the point in having to say something about every issue especially if you (not at you specifically just in general) aren’t immediately impacted by the issue. Like is the 14 yr old white marxist named sarah on twitter really gonna have meaningful insight on anti-asian violence ?

this is part of why i cannot telecommunicate. i dont want to do shit on the internet. i am able bodied so i know that this time has been of such ease for other people. but mentally i just can’t. i don’t have a comment on hand like that and i hvae no desire to engage with ppl that way. i am a super super super solitary person but thats bc it’s MY time so when it’s like all this effort with other people i dont ever want to be alone. it’s the same with the way i approach filmmaking. it isnt a sole thing so i hate it not together. that’s part of how u can get so sucked in and repeat doom scrolling. i was in this webinar last may after [redacted] and this black woman prof said “read with a community and talk” because otherwise she said we are torturing ourselves. you can’t carry that weight all on your own. unfortunately i hate zoom, discord, slack, signal, whatsapp, facetime. you name it this panera has made it evi.. L

you make a really excellent point. i think the young young gen zers are really really just interesting because it’s like this whole new world for them with leftist politics and they just can’t grasp the horrors of the world and the kind of freedom being a leftist can bring. and so many people don’t grow out of it. those people so happen to be the “least productive” in terms of how much time they spend IRL withe these issues. naturally, younger kids are gonna have a harder time. they are not as mobile as well so the internet becomes this place. but then it’s this echo chamber. and many times just things posted without sources. and social media NEEDS that to exist.

i think of the irony of leftist kids on tik tok and while i am happy it’s reaching them it’s just....different. very different. the growth of social media is so good but also so fucking sad, it’s too much! i think the point about not writing everything is major. even i have to do this which is part of the disappearing.y ou need to detach and make sure your head is on straight again. but when you think eveyrone has to be privvy to every thought and you can’t just sit back....which twitter and social media doesn’t encourage. you have to join in. that’s often why when i have something to say it is dense because i don’t feel like repeating it. ever. lmao ust ever. i cant pay attn. social media is a fucking minefield for my brain u can get so lost in it and absorb it but once u start talking you may not be able to stop. 

i think a big part of that is it not being a leisurely thing but sort of just in our lives always. this sounds like a grandpa rant but ykwim. We dont have to see the same thing over and over again. And eventually it gets sincerely diluted or its diluted bc of capitalism or whatever. Or if theyre very young or maybe they don’t have like the greatest way of sharing the knowledge? then it can be butchered. I hope this is making sense...i’m talking beyoond the boring surface-level milquetoast shit. i see really ahistorical stuff on there from leftists (like this thing about NK + africa and it being a beneficial rship as opposed to a um not beneficial one. and it isn’t.  beneficial but this young black girl was talking abt it and noname rtd and i was like it’s just too complex. there’s no good/bad here just bc it’s not america. dont get me started on this.)

but Lol that was kinda off topic but I think what I meant in my last reply about not turning off the voice in my head is about when I consume media, not necessarily when I’m online talking about. Even if I have criticism for something, I’m usually pretty chill when consuming fandom content bc I think being serious online all the time is kinda boring. Like sometimes I’m analyzing theme and shit but really most of the time im memeing.

exactly.........gotta laugh. thats why sometimes im like i cant think lmao. unfrotunately i have been ARGUING with ppl on the internet for rly no reason when  i could have replied to ur very nice fun wholesome message. i love torture. i miss memes.

“ i think the people who get the least enjoyment out of that are those so obsessed with getting upset with anyone thinking outside of their lines as if it equates to them “ EXACTLYYYYY

kekekekeke im glad u got it. it’s like with conservatives throwing around snowflake. now im beginning to question who the real complainers are. 

LMAO exactlyyyy. i posted a screenshot of this writer from twitter saying that exact thing. Like first of all, I’m...an adult? and if you are as well uh? i’m sorry for you but are we 12? But how is it affecting u this viscerally? And if it does why dont u...do...research? pihgofuaipoajghou but honestly everything u said. we’re trained to go into it with nothing. i was only around ur age when i started to get more serious about this stuff but you’re like lightyears ahead of where i was at 21. did i say this but i’m in iww and literally i can tell u in 2016 i did not think 2019 me would be in a union bc i told my friend in a train station that we don’t need unions. i was 23...but the thing is i didnt know what i was talking about. at all. and i knew i didnt know and she knew i didnt know and now i am the clown.

also yes at critical engagement. i had to learn so much through experience and this is tuff that i coudlnt be shielded from. there’s an empathy you kinda have to develop and this understanding that you move through the world as this person who is “nowhere and everywhere; nothing and everything” so i’ve always had to think about things differently just to survive. that’s also what can drag a lot of people towards it like theres so many black kpop fans bc i think a lot of the pain in SK can be mirrored (sort of) through our history. and theres currently a history now but it had to be forged. uh what was my point oh yea however i wouldnt have been able to move further if i didnt have my background to go off of  bc i knew something was off when i started getting into all these things (ill give u a hint) but if i had no prior knowledge and didnt have to think about it then the critical approach is either stale or stupid. 

i had to research but i dont understand how ppl are so bold with little to no research and understanding? thhey just inherently know with also like ZERO experience in what they need experience in. engaging critically means “how i see the world” with dashes of trying to be open adn understanding or whatever. actually that’s another thing like being afraid of criticizing things bc theyre foreign to you so u give it a pass (like we discussed) but it doesnt hAVE TO BEEEE JUST REAAAAAD and then take all the info ur teensy brain and apply it. be a normal human being and dont be fucking rude and racist. thats it! u can complain abt literally anything without being a dick.

as we start with LW and end with LW.....what do we think (i asked this already) omg please share wbl thoughts i THINK i know what ur talking about. well it could be two things; their rship when they came back and the physicality and then pei shou yi. i almost dont even want to use my brain to fucking look at that. i think wbl can get away with more bc of visual~*~*~* reasons (like literally, the look of the show. there’s more space to get lost in the frames. many thai dramas are a lot more literal? this isn’t the right word but it’s very heavily character focused particularly bc of $ i think) though good production also underscores flaws so i am also wrong. but like do u know what i mean? u have to kinda focus on it? or maybe it’s just cos like.....ur so used to it in thai bl idek. i’ve seen tw bl ofc. 

look i swear i will justify this forever bc there are some things we miss right but if u feel like someone’s a bad actor....theyre bad. it’s about tone movement etc etc etc and since most thai bl productions have 0 interest in that....well. they take these newbies and put them in these situations. we dont understand thai but if we see them and we’re like “wow this is really bad” then they’re bad lmao. IDC i will never be like cos idk what theyre saying NO WHY HE LOOK LIKE A ROBOT???????? DOES HE EMOTE? why is he CRYING WITH NO TEARS? and it’s not even a total requisite to cry with tears(i mean for me it is) but it’s just like what is happening on ur face right now young man????????

painful.

the inflection stuff is very valid ooh good point tho but that’s only a part of the piece. plus we get used to the way they communicate. like the ppl from sotus were prtty bad. i dont like that show but thats an ex of ppl liing the actors and the person i thought was better other ppl dont think that? well apparently hes a shitty guy but. um. so when theres decent acting its so glaring.

although i must say even tho i dont care for 2gether anymore and would never like to be reminded about its existence (only bc i just cringe lol) i honestly....didnt think bright was a bad actor? but people keep saying he is and i am much more inclined to believe them than myself. though i am not often dickmatized that could have been it. until he opened his mouth and ruined it and then i stopped paying attn.

although honestly i’m so much more critical than i could be positive. i have ben stumped for the last day about how i wasnt mad at his acting in the show. is it me? is it him? who’s......the wrong one.....(me) 

oh shit they have been denied? i haven’t been paying attn to whats been going on recently. i just got into it on MDL because of snowdrop. sometimes i literally cannot engage bc ill just be like alright well im black so this power button in my head is going off when ppl talk abt that shit. back in the day when kpop jawns were saying some real outta pocket anti black shit (now everyone is slick with it) it’d always be THEY DONT HAVE GOOGLE THEYVE NEVER SEEN A BLACK PERSON but really it’s like no...maybe they are just racist? that’s ok too.

also the past 2 weeks have been um atrocious bc how fucking easily people fell into the pit of white supremacy and started to turn their ire towards black people and making a competition between our groups just like they wanted. it’s not about the women who are dead anymore, who were sex workers, their womanhood, being asian, being poor anymore. it’s about how much black people get attention and why people only pay attn to us. i am not feeling very generous this week for ppl to excuse that hsit.

on a lighter note, ppl say that abt the whole husband and wife thing. i dont know how to explain how angry that shit makes me but maybe it’s because i do not want to think of my body in relation to a fucking penis at all hours of the day. if bls could kindly not do that it would be nice lmao 

yes there are a lot of those. who are only there to gawk lmao. and just idk worship bc of the cult of personality thing bc of how weird and open they have to be as actors. some of the others are people who /think/ theyre really smart (i think im asmart but i also think i am very dumb and i have adhd to prove that MEDICALLY!!!) but are actually not? or their observations arent great? or idk if they are they arent interesting? but i think well..........we have more refined palettes :P

jk also theres just different personalities. you and  i mesh more bc we have a lot of the same beliefs and are coming from the same place. that makes it easier to understand as well. i really try to remember that but some people are really weird so. again just...the perception of certain things even down to acting skills. but i also dont like.......believe this genre can really do anything at all. on one hand i want them to do it right bc it’s a piece of work so they should. be proud of it. cos most things arent advancing us bc representation and culturalism are a lie bla bla. it’s just that when the depictions are negative or not done well it adds to the problem as opposed to the things that are well done are fairly benign and can’t really pull us back (perf example is the black panther film. i woudl definitely not say it was transgressive as a literal work but visually it’s just stunning. and it’s sad that it’s stunning and surprising but still with basically an all black cast of mostly dark people abd like what it means in the zeitgeist yes. it’s also just a good movie. but it’s still imperialist prop and unfortunately and this is fucking pathetic to say it “opened eyes” in other countries where they hate black ppl and ignore their own racialized minorities HENNYWAYSSSS a better ex is moonlight except moonlight isnt mainstream and is indie tho...still thru a funnel of capital bc a24 but who cares bleed the fuckers dry is my motto. my point is moonlight is both a great work and doesnt bring any failures to the table and its existence helps in ways outside of art but they arent the defining things giving us material advancement sooooo i mean it’s complex (this is my conclusion to everything um guys it’s complex) 

er i had one more point in conjunction to above. oh yea so i like dont need all these extra things to make it progressive. like people really want more women in the show and i am honestly like i really dont. i dont want them to actively do this. if they cant do it naturally then let someone else do it. i am not asking for more bc i dont want it from them. when something comes along i embrace it but i do not see why women should be represented when the genre RELIES on patriarchy. there is no complete satisfying existence for the women in these series. i dont want it. i dont ask people to show us~*~* or respect~* like fuck no the people who make it make it and hopefully more will make it in the future but i will not beg bc THEY DONT WANT TO DO IT SO WOULD FORCING IT MAKE IT BETTER? just fucking leave them out entirely. that’s the answer if theyre gonna make nasty female characters then those bitches can geaux. we have other plcaes to be. booked. and. BUSY!

[tfw-no-tennis]

mtmte liveblog issue 9

back at it again, and its time for the shadowplay arc, HELL yeah

oh I'm so excited i love this arc lets DO this

oooh its nightbeat and quark!! way before they become relevant, which is so cool

‘one of those recepticon fanatics’ lmao imagine if they were...the recepticons. just doesn't have the same ring to it 

god i fucking love all the politics of mtmte. i love how they’re talking about the senate here before we really get to See how bad they were (we heard a bit about it from whirl a few issues ago, and now here)

love how nightbeat is pretty much agreeing with the decepticon ideology here, even if its clear that he isn't Actually a decepticon - it just drives home the fact that, in this story, The Decepticons Were Right About A Lot Of That Stuff (or at least, they had a reason other than ‘destruction’ for rebelling). 

AND THEN THERES RUNG!!!!!!! WITH HIS MODEL OF THE LOST LIGHT....god i fuckgin LOVE the continuity in this story bc the first time reading this ur like oh ok rung is old yea makes sense...but then later all the time travel stuff happens and then its like OHHHHH 

damn poor rung nightbeat can rlly tell he's lonely just by looking at him vbhjdkdfhbjsjkdf geez. also nightbeat that's ur mystery stick bf from the future js!!

quarks extreme POV on all of the stuff is so interesting, and makes so much sense bc of Course he would think that as a non-combatant scientist who, due to his functional value in current society, wouldn't really benefit much from a revolution - in fact, he’d probably lose a lot. and that’s the sort of thing where you’re like, ok well think about everyone else dude, have some perspective - but at the same time, quark did suffer a pretty terrible fate, so his fears weren't entirely unfounded...augh, its so fascinating...im sorry I'm not gonna shut up about space robot politics this Entire time

HOW did nobody notice that dead body before now

ratchet spray-painting the hands he stole from pharma to match his own paintjob is like...kinda gruesome if you think about it hvbhsjkdfbkjdf

i love rewind sooo much oh my god 

he rlly stashed rung’s comatose body in a wheelchair behind the bar hbkjdhfbshjkdf rewind 

rewind and chromedome’s tag-team explanation....ough hhhhh THEM 

wait a sec, rewind, you have medical records in your database? that is, at least according to regular medical laws, very illegal lmao. my favorite long-running theme in mtmte: the fact that hipaa and osha laws on cybertron are either basically nonexistent, or just universally disregarded 

what the actual fuck is up w/cybertronian time units. that shit is wack as hell 

ooh i love how chromedome looks different in the flashback - no shoulder tires! - that's a cool detail

how come prowl just said ‘minute,’ rewind was busting it up w/all the wack ass fantasy time units just a second ago. geez

also goddd i love the scenery of pre-war cybertron, its SUCH a cool setting like, visually and aesthetically and politically

like, i adore details like the sign in the bg that says ‘everyone’s shape serves a purpose.’ really adds to the ‘society on the precipice of civil war currently controlled by an increasingly-desperate faction who are doling out propaganda like crazy in an attempt to maintain their image and control over the populace’ vibe

good ole murder mystery setup. love it!

pre-war prowl is such an interesting character. actually prowl in general is such an interesting character...I kinda wrote him off during my first read of mtmte (and even a little during my second readthru) as just this dude who’s an asshole (espec bc my prev tf experience involved watching tfa as a kid, and this prowl is very different from tfa prowl lol)...but prowl is SUCH a multi-faceted and interesting character, even in the relatively little we see of him in mtmte 

plus it was interesting to learn later that prowl was one of the characters that jro wanted for mtmte and didn't get, and MAN i wish he got prowl bc I would've loved to see what jro would've done w/prowl on the lost light, that would've been amazing. like, just imagine the arc he would have...I have no idea what that arc would BE, but I know it would be awesome. plus I’d be really interested to see how prowl would factor in, relationships-wise, amongst the crew of the lost light. so much potential!

anyways. I'm in a very talky mood tonight it seems. its currently 4 am so that kinda explains it. ok, moving on!

chromedome and prowl bantering....in their own morbid forensic-cop way...

skids bvhjdbsfjasf. speaking what we’re all thinking: is prowl gonna keep showing up in mtmte despite not technically being part of the cast??

swerves drawing of prowl lmaoooo

AND THEN REWIND IN SOME OF MY FAVORITE MTMTE PANELS....fuckgin cracks me up every time god. rewind was rlly about to flip their entire ass table just to demonstrate that prowl is a serial table-flipper...and then he cant even make the table budge and he just stares at his hands like ‘how could you betray me like this’ hvbajkhhsfdhksdf PEAK hilarity

drift hvbshfdjbasdfj his forcibly cheery expression even tho he’s being harassed by rodimus, who is a big whiny toddler w/drift lmao 

rodimus is the type of guy who, upon drift not replying to one of his texts, would post a whole twitter thread being all like ‘these days u cant trust any1 to hav ur back...u think u kno someone and then they just ghost you...(1/14)’

again, rewind, HOW and WHY do you just Have medical reports, oh my god, somebody please call a hipaa agent I’m scared, 

ratchet interrupting the story to give a quick medical PSA....that's Such an on-brand thing for Me to do that I feel like jro is assigning me ratchet kin as I read this

also, hey, its sonic and boom, those two decepticons from delphi! nice little continuity there

AND HERES ORION PAX SUPER COP

can’t believe idw made my dad optimus prime into a cop. smh. shouldn't be that shocked tho, I feel like half the idw characters are cops

orion rlly hit them w/the omae wa mo shinderu arrest strat

orion: I cant believe you're beating this guy up. anyways, now I'm gonna beat YOU up,

when ratchet puts his hand over drifts mouth and then gets spray paint on drifts face bhjdfsvsdjhfgbjdskf

pre-war ratchet and drift ;_; ratchet’s little inspirational speech...the fact that he tells drift that he’s special...the fact that drift remembered all of this even after 4 million+ yrs...it gets me bro it GETS me

ALSO the layers in the fact that drift then goes on to become a well-known murderous decepticon...so this little scene of him and ratchet in the past gives a lot of context to ratchet’s general attitude towards drift - ratchet clearly feels at least somewhat responsible for all the blood on drift’s hands, since he saved drift’s life way back in the day

the whole relinquishment clinic thing is such cool worldbuilding, bc of course that's the kind of thing that would develop in a society of robot aliens who are only allowed to work within the rigid confines of their alt mode 

I love the whole matrix thing bc its kinda like being the pope or st but also you have a ton of political sway, so its a super important position, so of Course the corrupt senate would want full control over that power, and would assassinate the current prime to try to get their own guy in 

god vhbhjsdkbgshjdf rodimus is such a dick lmao poor drift

HHHHH I love that the cybertronian version of an autopsy is taking the dudes body apart into the smallest components and laying them all out. that's so fucking cool

hmmmm chromedome maybe you should Not be interested in mnemology, how about that,

oh god. time to start being sad about op and senator shockwave. oh god

senator shockwave more like senator sexy 

also the first time I read this I thought I had just missed his name and like halfway thru the story I went back and scoured the pages looking for it hbvhsjdfbshgfdsbj then I was like oh ok so we’re maybe supposed to just know who this guy is from another comic? but NOPE it was very deliberate and I only realized very close to the end that they were setting up some sort of reveal

its funny bc normally I'm not a huge fan of stories where politics play a huge role but I fuckgin love it here, the politics and worldbuilding is all so interesting and also balanced out with a healthy dose of cool sci-fi hijinks, so

lmao there's chromedome being obsessed w/people making the ‘pfft’ sound 

also wow yet more hindsight, maybe you Shouldn’t be so interested in the Institute, chromedome, 

OHHHH shit I forgot abt the red alert stuff happening at the same time as this :( :( :( 

AUGHHH what a fucked up situation. god 

oooof i gotta continue now!! what a solid issue, I love the shadowplay arc

#lj rereads mtmte

[mulderspice]

have you ever watched an episode of the Emmy award winning sci-fi drama, The X Files?  Maybe you’ve read my original post and yet you’re still wondering where the hell Fox Mulder got all those strands of hair on his jumbo gigantic head.  I am back and here to help you find the answers to some of your burning questions; as we celebrate the hard work and triumphs of the hair and makeup department on the Fox Lot and team up with my big huge brain and my New York State Cosmetology license to give the people what they want once again: another top ten guide to Mulder’s fucking hair..

upon making this post a second time (rip 😔), I realized that just about every episode (yes, every. single. one. even the ones without Mulder and the latest season where he has to share headspace with [redacted]) has its own important and iconic hair looks... You may recognize that some of these are slightly repeated from the last post but that’s ok! What I'm here to do is enforce! So lets get started..

#10 s6:e21 Field Trip: Here again we begin our journey into cosmetic superstardom with a personal favorite of mine.  Mulder rolling with the times by getting a haircut fresh off the FTF wave left our nation in fucking shambles. Can’t imagine going to see a major motion picture in theatres jam packed with Mulder’s most supreme hair looks only to come back to my tv screen to see it all gone away.  For students reading this post for educational purposes, this caused a worldwide walkout on popular salon franchise Supercuts in the year 1998.  However, a haircut didn’t necessarily mean Mulder forgot how to take care of his hair.  The precision and placement as each strand of hair perfectly outlines his jumbo head is revolutionary and inspiring.  Mushroom induced drug high? K. Lemme still grab my teasing comb and my hairspray and make sure I look presentable for when my partner walks into my apartment screaming abt “where's Mulder” and wanting “answers”.  The answer is this: this look is about giving people like myself with big heads rights and looking fuckable while doing so. 10/10 for inspiring hope.

#9 s1:e9 Space: Imagine you’re a few episodes into a show, the core plot is developing right before your eyes and you’re beginning to get to know The X Files three main characters; Fox Mulder, Dana Scully, and Mulder Hair Strands #1-3.  All is well except, you still have no clue how crucial, and critical Mulder Hair Strands 1-3 will become to the show and to your life and I am here to tell you that you are in for a very rude and bold awakening.  This message goes out to all the haters and all the people who didn’t believe Mulder’s hair was valid prior to season 4. He is here to tell you he DID know how to use dry shampoo and even the occasional blow dry oil and you can suck a dick abt it. Bold of you to assume he wouldn’t pull the round brush and the biosilk out the drawer to impress a visit to fucking NASA. 10/10 for involving science.

#8 s4:e6 Sanguinarium: I sit here writing to you today as the song ‘Handmade Heaven’ comes on shuffle; strikingly fitting for this raw and ethereal image of straight up beauty and wonder and magic and heaven in hair. This special, freshly washed and air dried smells like strawberries and sandalwood and fuckability. The look reaches through your TV and wraps its hands around your neck and sucks the life right out of you.  Are you gonna let it happen? You sure are.  Lucky for you, I just so happened to be there when the angels hand sewed each strand of hair onto his head and here’s what they had to say about it:  this is everything and more and the way Mulder has just washed his hair with fresh mountain water droplets hand collected like nothing else mattered. Put his clothes back on and went on his merry way. Can’t imagine being in Scully’s shoes ready to walk on in her partners room unannounced to go over serious case related matters and theories.  Woulda went bonkers. This truly is a handmade heaven.  Hand crafted by Mulder for Scully and for the good viewers of the globe. 10/10 for embracing me in its arms.

#7 s4:e3 Home: A look from one of primetime TV’s most notorious banned episodes.  Viewer discretion IS advised not only for the horrifying and cringeworthy content displayed in this episode, but for also making it painfully blunt to the viewer that Mulder’s hair follicles are happier and healthier than anybody else's will ever be in their lifetime.  In fact, I can feel my own hair falling out and being respawned onto HIS head as I type this and I’m sure you can too. The way the sun glistens off his golden brown strands makes me want to walk into oncoming traffic.  You might also notice how effortless this look was, as it probably only took a quick run thru with his fingers, and Mulder’s passion and need to look sexy at any time of the day at all times. It’s obvious that this kind of thing comes naturally to him, which just comes off as insulting to men everywhere. 11/10 for striking fear into men’s hearts.

#6 s4:e20 Small Potatoes: Genuinely took every bone and nerve ending in my body to not put this look in the top 5 even though it so clearly deserves it.  Here at mulderspice we believe in diversity, meaning it wouldn’t be right to make my top five greatest hairstyles ever produced on The X Files just of Mulder’s iconic and revolutionizing middle part (though really who is stopping me..). This screenshot in general has me up in arms at how perfectly the blue background matches his eyes, and how it accentuates his hydrated skin and lips.  But you’re not here for that. It’s the hair particularly that really pulls the shot together, as Mulder took the time that morning to spray it with some tinted dry shampoo that most defiantly and absolutely smells like chocolate.   This look feels like a warm hug on a frigid winter day. I feel EMBRACED and I feel CARED FOR thanks to the wonderful staff and team @ Mulder’s head and hair follicles. What the fuck could be better than this. 16/10 for making me feel some type of way.

#5 s4:e8 Tunguska: Currently you may not think anything of Krycek to the left of this image though ill have you know he plays an extremely vital part of this look and all the words I’m about to speak to you directly. So listen up: Krycek may have heroically slayed Mulder’s father in cold blooded and justifiable murder, but we thank him for this, as it caused Mulder to lash out in the best way possible: through looks. “Un-shun: Krycek do you think I’m good to bring my Redkin Rewind 6 styling paste with me or will the Russian TSA think of that as contraband? :Re-shun”.  A sweaty, manly and highly illegal treck through a Russian testing facility and a stint in a violent foreign PRISON surely was not going to stop Mulder from keeping his hair properly hydrated, styled and parted. That’ll really ruffle Krycek’s feathers and make him feel sorry for what he did…. The sexiest way to avenge the death of your deadbeat father. 24/10 for you know why.

#4 s1:e6 Shadows: In the year 1993, Mulder steps onto the scene, young, fresh faced, bright eyed and ready to give men around the globe what they (so desperately) needed: the encouragement to care about their hair.  Any backstreet boy you may know have this scene to thank directly, as this is what encouraged them to reproduce Mulder’s hair onto their own heads time and time again.  What I would give to see with my own eyes Mulder length times width times height his head to equal this perfectly proportionate look of volume and sexy. And who can I write a warrant out to for allowing this shot to take place.  Oh to be the various and expensive hair care products in Mulder’s bathroom …… 899/10 for starting a movement (-1 for making us do equations).

#3: s1:e10 Fallen Angel: The biggest regret I’ve ever had in my short little life was not adding this moment to the last post.  And tumblr deleted it in order to give me this opportunity to present this to you today.  By the way, that absolutely is in fact a choir of angels singing as you view this image. Go ahead and try to think of something on this earth that could be better than this tossled bed headed im-stressed-becos-my-partner-of-2-weeks-isn’t-seeing-the-big-picture-about-how-we’re-all-key-pawns-in-an-ongoing-government-conspiracy hairstyle hand crafted by Mulder all while holding his head in his hands hard at work trying to break through to the truth.  Scully [insert photo of Scully with her eyes popping out of her head here] and I both wanna rip our own hair out and throw it in the garbage. 2000/10 for making our hearts ache..

#2: s4:e10 Paper Hearts: Behold- the image I’m slamming down on the desk at full force when I finally get myself a therapist. I need a licensed professional doctor to help me understand the various angles that this purposeful shot affects my life health and well being. In a paranoia induced out of body experience Mulder took his pinky finger and parted his hair down the middle, took a protractor to perfectly round the tendrils falling ever so gracefully on his forehead and ran out of his apartment and through the woods of DC.  Doesn’t matter if he’s crazy? Doesn’t matter if its fuck all 4am? Who knows if the discoveries of this night is finally going to answer the heartbreaking questions regarding Mulder’s baby sister? Fuck it we’re just gonna make sure Scully has something to look forward to after being awoken yet again in the middle of the night and asked to come wrangle and control this stupid idiot.  This just makes me unhinged.  50000/10 for waking up in the middle of the night and doing the most for us all.  

#1 s4:e3 Teliko: This one will remain number one for as long as I shall live.  I’ve dedicated my life to this cause and I’m ready to make you painfully aware of it. Grab a pen and paper and get ready to do some heavy math with me because this look right in front of your eyes is the equation to happiness and sexiness. Can barely find the words to describe to you how this picture makes me feel. Each strand of hair is personally reaching down and wrapping his head in one big giant hug of protection and solitude.  Unbelievable that Scully didn’t head back to her hotel room and scream at the top of her lungs right after this. There’s no way she went about her day as normal without wanting to kick the shit out of him and then put him back together with soft feathery kisses.  What you are witnessing here is the very turning point of the show where Scully looked into into the very center point of that part and said “guess I have no choice but to fall in love with him 🚶🏽‍♂️”. Chris Carter’s idealistic version of Mulder and the one we actually ended ups seeing as viewers were so drastically different that it’s blatantly clear that he had absolutely no idea the cultural implications that were about to rock the world to its core and tip it on its axis when David Duchovny showed up on set looking like this. I could write a thesis about this. I could conduct research and studies about this.  I got kicked out of college because I cared more about this than I did actual schoolwork. I feel like I’m in a very sexy chokehold. Wish I could live forever in one little square pixel of this image.  Nothing means more to me than this.  1000000/10 no further comments.

and the honorable mentions go to....

s8:e16 Three Words: Dead? Did you die? Did you die and miraculously defy god by rising from the dead and coming back to life? Just got home from the morgue? Think nothing is the same? Left guessing if you’re a soon to be 5 minute father? Did you just fucking die? He’s lost his family and his job and the world just went on without him like it was nobody’s business.  Walked out of the morgue right to his apartment and what did he have left? His expensive array of hair styling and finishing products that’s what the fuck he had left.  Being an all around reject from society didn’t at all stop him from taking his fingers and dipping it into that Big Sexy styling pomade and fluffing his head to high heavens. As a personal fuck you to god and to John Doggett too.  He’ll never let you know the emotional hellstorm going on in his life in that moment but he WILL make it known to you that despite being 8 feet under ground for 6 months he’ll never give up on his hair. For the PEOPLE. Try and go through the nightmare of death and then rejected fatherhood and see if you come out of it with any hair at ALL.  An itty bitty glimpse into what would have been Untitled Mulder Abduction Story (2001)....

I Want To Believe (2008): Here you will see the sluttiest moment in major motion picture history.  Shh im not using this opportunity to show you this screenshot for the 800th time I’m trying to keep you educated.  BREAKING NEWS; Man hiding in home office for 6 years fully off the grid has FULL head of hair and is getting regular sex *not clickbait*. So what if Mulder has gone fully unhinged and off the walls bonkers he’s also gone FULL slut and it shows in that sexy thick voluminous head of slut hair.  If you ever for a second thought prior to seeing this movie for the first time that Mulder would show up a full on son-less wreck and a half think the fuck again babes.  He’s managed to hold on to every single little strand ever grown on his head even well into his middle aged madness and its about time we give him the credit he deserves.  (PS. Please know I wrote this entire spiel without even viewing the shot shown here. Its just permanently etched on the inside of my forehead so its there when my eyes roll back into my head.)  For this we say…..; Whore rights.

s11:e3 Plus One: Incase you were unaware, I have been going through a very slow and painful process of erasing Season 11 from my brain completely.  Its been a long road but its achievable and the end result will save me from a lot of future heartache and trauma.  This however, is a moment I will cherish forever and though you may think its for the hot sex (which is like maybe 30% the case) its actually because it puts together everything I’ve ever loved and believed about the show in only a few thousand pixels. How old is Mulder here? 30? 31? Still has hair and still has an unbelievable amount of love to shower Scully in for as long as they both shall live (which lets face it, she deserves one million times over.)  What this has taught me was to hang up my “Mulder deserved…” hat for good and just be thankful for what I’ve got. I ended up with no son or happy dreamy ending where Mulder gets to die with a family he’s never had in his life, but here we are left with the little things.. Like Mulder and Scully’s unconditional love and most importantly .. The hair on Mulder’s head. Its called growth and acceptance and I am learning it.  Also I just wanted to show you what it would look like if you were like 57 and sexy and still had all ur hair. That’s it :-)

#and this one i SAVED!!!!! enjoy #here at mulderspice

[carlyfrombleachers]

Liveblogging of TS6 (reputation)

Okay. Let me preface this by saying I don’t like Taylor Swift. I think she’s a boring artist, who brings close to nothing to the table. The reason I’m even listening to Reputation is because I keep getting recommended an interview of Jack Antonoff where he talks about New Year’s Day (which is a song on Reputation) and I really want to watch that but I also want to know what the fuck he’s talking about. So here we are. Don’t expect more stuff like this from me. I expect this to be just a one-off thing. Swifties, don’t fucking come after me or I will cry. The only other TS album I listened to was Lover, and I thought it was trash. Absolute garbage. And apparently this one is worse than Lover. I don’t know if I’ll regret this.

Let’s begin, I guess.

...Ready For It?

I keep thinking of that one voice clip from the Hannah Montana intro (?) where you faintly hear a girl say “are you ready for it?” and that’s my first impression just by looking at the title.

I’m hitting ‘play’ right now.

Oh nevermind, I forgot to pay Deezer this month. YouTube it is.

Hey look, Ajay is in my recommended. Queen of reactions.

Help what is this

rockstar taylor??

what the fuck is up with the beat

chorus felt weak. this is my first opinion im not done with the track

i looked at the music video for 3 seconds and i saw a horse bye

i was distracted by the music video help i dont like this

since i looked at the music video for just a lil while i should say it looks weird. it is weird in a bad way it looks like some knockoff cyberpunk thing.

why didnt she just name this “Are You Ready For It?”

I’m... not particularly blown away by this track. It’s fine. I wouldn’t bop to it but I wouldn’t object to it playing somewhere. It’s like... it’s decent.

End Game (ft. Ed Sheeran, Future)

I don’t know who Future is.

she said reputation haha thats the name of the album

ok future is a rapper i dont listen to rap thats why i dont know him

after listening to lover i cant believe this is the same woman this is so weird

not looking forward to the ed sheeran part

“i wanna be your end game” this wasnt really what i was expecting

fuck off ed sheeran (i just reached his part)

according to some tabloid lady gaga mistook ed sheeran for a waiter? i would do the same thing if i saw this redhead fuckface on the street as well lol

“big reputation, big reputation, you and me got a big reputation” so deep!!!

I guess I should take this time to-- is she rapping?

Sorry, I got distracted. I don’t think every song needs to be this huge deep piece that must be deeply analyzed for centuries, but I do expect some interesting message or context for a track at least. If it sounds good, I’d also give it a pass. 

This one? This was boring. I would not verbally object to this playing close to me, I would just have a grossed out look on my face during the chorus.

I Did Something Bad

I keep reading the title in Akasaka Sad’s tune. You know the part where Rina says “A-ka-sa-ka sad, I’m a sucker”? I keep thinking “I did-I did something bad”. I don’t expect it to be like that.

“i never trust a narcissist but they love me” taylor talks about her fanbase

sorry to drag swifties publicly but i will forever take an opportunity to drag a swiftie

predictable antithesis use there with “i did something bad so why does it feel so good” but okay

why was taylor branded a snake again? she pretended it was “””gone””” with lover but like. it’s weird. its not like she punched kanye on stage in 2008 or something. i dont care enough to search for evidence that taylor is a snake so lol go off i guess

dont enjoy the post-chorus part where she’s like drddddddd dddddddd it feels so distracting the gunshots were more than enough

Yeah, this one was fine. My favorite up to this point, I think.

Don’t Blame Me

lol she said “dont blame me” then it buffered bye

i was showering for the past 25 minutes hello i was listening to track 10 and melodrama

i am enjoying this one kinda

“dont blame me love made me crazy” haha wait until you find out what your next era is

“i once was poison ivy now im your daisy” this is a pretty good line honestly

obligatory katy flop moment: haha taylor could hit the high notes in daisy

this sounds like a country song especially in the chorus i dont know what to really make of it

“loooord save me” this is why your female fans are called horse girls

This was... pretty good. The chorus weirds me out still, but it had its good moments. It was nice.

Delicate

stop saying reputation in the reputation album

this autotune voice bits of hers are so distracting

i say as i listen to how i’m feeling now by charli xcx

yes i did just roast myself. gotta leave the swifties with nothing

god the music video for this track has 400m views this woman is making my faves look like indie stars LOL

I keep getting distracted because this song is boring. It’s... okay. I guess. The music video was pretty cute. Nothing caught my attention in the track, but it sounds like gym music. It would play on a gym owned by a 30-something white woman during the yoga classes and you know it.

Look What You Made Me Do

We’ve all heard this song. I’m gonna listen to it and then be done with it.

I guess I’ll just watch the music video.

ONE BILLION VIEWS????????????

Okay. I watched the music video.

Really? All the fem guys dancing with her?

I’m not going to sit here and be like “fem guys are BAD and should all die and never be represented” because… lol. But it is kind of annoying how it was literally just fem guys dancing with her and doing all those faces because you KNOW she was looking for the impressionable gays to go “omg taylor progressive!!!!” and go talk about it on social media.

But am I saying that because I don’t like Taylor? Yes. But that doesn’t make my point less valid.

The music video was pretty good, the production on this track is really good (thank you Jack Antonoff xx) and the track itself is good. Not outstanding or perfect or a serve, it’s good.

Also the ending with all her previous eras? That was cool. The uncool part is most of the “look how rich I am” parts… because we all know you’re rich, Taylor. Nice SFX.

So It Goes…

i got an ad whyyyyyyy

fuck this shit i cant keep up with what shes saying im pulling genius out for this one

this is not lyrically deep i can tell already from genius

im not a fan of love songs i already have CRJ to cover that base and Lorde covers breakup songs I guess and this song is just. boring. lol

Nothing really shocking or noteworthy here, it’s just.. okay.

Gorgeous

I got another ad FUCK

i got a boss baby ad help

god boss baby really was something huh i completely forgot about that

why am i talking about boss baby

okay. reputation

why did a baby say gorgeous

HELP i am so disappointed this is the one track with the lyric video and god this is disappointing

i saw this and i was like “oh shit shes gonna talk about how its gonna be gorgeous when u die” or smth and

lol. LOL. the depth is nonexistent and the bar is in hell

who wrote this? you lied

This song is so boring, LOL. I expected so much from it and was instantly disappointed when the pre-chorus hit. You had everything on your plate and you ate the plate itself. Girl. What the hell. Why. You could’ve given us an anthem about hating your man, and you took the easy route.

Getaway Car

im intrigued

okay im listening and this sounds very jack antonoff? the shotgun thing made me immediately go o_o

it felt a bit weak at the end but at the start i was enjoying it quite a lot… i think this is my fave

I enjoyed this one quite a lot :) It was pretty good but not an amazing masterpiece. It was better than LWTMMD and that’s all I have to say.

King Of My Heart

sounds boring haha

taylor keeps putting these trap beats in things sister youre not lorde LOL

yeah this is kinda boring

WAIT A MINUTE NEW YEARS DAY IS THE LAST TRACK???? IM GONNA HAVE TO STICK UNTIL THE END oh my god please no

i dont. i .. i knew this would be happening but i didnt expect it to be the last one

i guess the timing is accurate ha ha ha ha

i just heard ariana grande

I keep hearing Ariana Grande on this track. Is that good? I don’t know.

Dancing With Our Hands Tied

why are there so many songs in this fucking album

the beat is.. okay. it is catchy

oh i like this i think. its pretty nice

the chorus is nice. yes. i do kind of enjoy this

Yeah, I liked this one. Pretty good writing, and it sounds great.

Dress

wtf is this song why is it so horny

horny taylor is weird stop being horny please

this song is okay i would not revisit it because its just weird. do not like this!!!

when carly rae jepsen says slide on through my window it is funny but when taylor sings i bought this dress so you could take it off i die

oh that second of silence was really good

[looks at the producer] [it’s jack antonoff] :)

This song weirds me out. I don’t like it. It had its moments production-wise but it was... weird.

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

I expect good things from this. With a title like that? Give me a bop.

Currently not being a bop.

Okay, it was cute. Nothing amazing. Just… fine. Cute attempt.

oh i liked the spoken part thats what i expected from this song

Call It What You Want

this is about genitalia this is my prediction

It was not about genitalia.

This song is pretty good if you remove all the mentions to her lover and her man and her baby, which are all the same person, I guess.

This is disappointing.

JACK ANTONOFF BACKING VOCALS

I LOVE YOU JACK

umm anyways

OH HE DID IT AGAIN IM GONNA CRY i love this man

I expected so much from this track and the chorus just… disappointed me.

JACK!!! I LOVE YOU!!!! KEEP SINGING!!!!!

i love this man im gonna cry

The highlight of this song is the part where Jack Antonoff sings.

New Year’s Day

wow the reason why im doing this shit

look at him. :)

this song was cute. nothing special. just cute. very okay.

just. okay. yeah. pretty fine.

nothing special.

Final Thoughts On The Album

It was better than Lover.

I expected this to be a concept album, all about the drama she’s gotten into? But it was just boring love songs with some extra flair. I expected great things from this album, having only heard LWYMMD from it before this. A concept album that’s just an answer/clapback to everyone’s who wronged her à la Yellow Flicker Beat (I know it’s for a movie but that song slaps and I don’t know a thing about Hunger Games) would’ve been PERFECT but it was just... love songs. I need Taylor to stop singing about love and start serving us big meals.

I would not like to revisit this. Like, 5/10. It could’ve been a lot better, but it wasn’t because you’re too afraid to cross some lines, Taylor.

Final Ranking:

Dancing With Our Hands Tied

Getaway Car

Look What You Made Me Do

I Did Something Bad

Don’t Blame Me

New Year’s Day

Call It What You Want

...Ready For It?

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

So It Goes...

End Game (feat. Ed Sheeran, Future)

Dress

Delicate

King Of My Heart

Gorgeous

taylor flop stream gone now

#taylor swift #liveblog #liveblogging #reputation #swifties dont kill me thanks #i dont like taylor swift why did i do this #music

[flowerx-lovex]

adore 🌟🍃 -Billie Eilish fic-

This was requested by @bratyee and it was such a good ass request ✨ i blow ass bc im so mfing slow I’m sorry 🥺🥺 btw lets say your ass is on stranger things and your best friend is Clairo bc i love her ass💀 basic I know but ily

New text from:

Claire🦋

Claire🦋: oh my god y/n have you fucking seen the interview where billie says your her celeb crush??? omfgggggg

Me: dude what??

Claire🦋: here I’ll send you the link you’re gonna flip tf out (link)

I open the link which takes me to a video of billie and an interviewer from teen vogue

It starts out with her answering questions about her music and what she plans on doing in the future and then it gets to more personal questions

“So we really want to know... who is your celebrity crush?” The interviewer asks her, Billie starts to blush and smirks a little

“Um y/n y/l/n no cap I’m serious I’ve had a crush on her ass since the very beginning of stranger things ugh she could GEETTT ITTTT” she starts laughing

“Oh my god” I say out loud, is she actually serious?

For a couple of months now, ever since ST3 came out, she’s been subtweeting/not so subtweeting about her crush on me which I’ve completely returned the favor too, I mean she’s billie fucking eilish and she’s hot as fuck of course I’m going to flirt back with her even if it’s on public social media

We haven’t talked or anything, I’ve wanted to reach out and say something but my shy ass could never

Some fans have caught on, but some haven’t, and of course the ones who haven’t certainly know now

I immediately close the video and go onto twitter to see if there is any commentary about the interview.. and of course... there is

‘Billie x y/n’ is trending on twitter, shit

I bite my lip and decide to message Claire back

Me: is this shit for real?

Claire🦋: i know it’s crazy asf you two HAVE to meet

Me: are you shitting me? how??

Claire🦋: message her on insta?? duh??

Me: oh shit lmao you right

I quickly go to Instagram but then stop myself, wait what the fuck do I even say? I don’t want to sound weird. What if I say something creepy and then she thinks I’m-

*ding*

Oh shit

billieeilish: hi... so you have probably seen the interview and we are trending rn im sorry if that shit made you uncomfortable

Me: omfg no actually I’m not uncomfortable at all, I’m flattered babe really

billieeilish: are you sure?

Me: very! tbh I’ve had a crush on you since your first album came out 🥺

billieeilish: deadass? you should have said something dude!

Me: ME? omfg im shy asfff and I saw you posting shit about me why didn’t YOU say something?

billieeilish: ...lmao i was scared you’re pretty as fuck

Me: we should like go on a date or some cute shit like that... jk unlessssss

billieeilish: oh my fuck yesssss we definitely should go on a date what are you doing tomorrow??

Me: literally nothing omfg am I actually going to see your ass tomorrow?

billieeilish: do you like coffee shops? let’s go to civil coffee their shit is soooo good and no one ever goes there

Me: adore them

billieeilish: then yeah tf you are seeing my ass tomorrow im about to fall the fuck over i can’t believe I’m going to meet you

Me: aww omfg same 🥰🥰🥰 give me a time and I’ll be there babe

billieeilish: is 10am okay?

Me: it’s perfect I’ll see you there yeah?

billieeilish: of course 🖤

Holy shit this is actually happening, I’m actually going to see her

I text Claire screenshots of the chat and she is legit flipping her shit but then again so am I.

This will be very interesting

*next day*

I drive to the little coffee shop in the lowkey part of town and park in a little parking spot in front of the shop there is hardly anybody here except like 2 old peop- oh my fuck I see her, she’s in the back and she’s sitting alone, aww she looks nervous ugh and I’m already shaking, why am I shaking? She’s a human just like I am... a really cute human, who I happen to have a massive crush on shit okay just chill the fuck out, take a deep breath... let’s go

I get out of my car and take another very shaky breath

I open the shop door and hear a little ding as it opens basically telling everyone I’m here.

Billie looks up when she hears the ding, our eyes meet and she smiles really big, I smile back and wave

I quickly walk over to the table and sit across from her

She’s even prettier in person, her eyes are the most gorgeous shade of blue and she has such a calm yet bold presence, it’s hard to explain but I’m already catching major feels and we haven’t even spoken yet

“Hi i was wondering if i could get your autograph I’m a huge fan” I say jokingly, my cheeks hurt so bad from trying not to smile too hard

She bites her lip, I can see she’s also trying not to smile like a crazy person either

“I can’t believe I’m actually in front of you right now I mean shit oh my god you’re real.” She said laughing, I can see her checking me out, in a flattering way and in an analyzing way

“I hope I didn’t disappoint.” I say and wink, she shakes her head and smirks

“You’re pretty as fuck like my heart hurts oh my god I know that sounds fucking corny.” She says, she smiles and rolls her eyes

“Shush stop you’re gonna make me blush and then I’m going to get really red and ew.” I say with a smile and look away from her for a moment

We talk about a bunch of different things, her music, what she did when she was little, what I did when I was little, why I got into acting, what I think about social media, what she likes and dislikes and a bunch of other random topics. It doesn’t hit me that we’ve been talking for legit hours until I hear a phone.

It’s her phone that starts to ring, she looks at the the screen and then to me

“Oh shit it’s finneas um can you give me a second babe?” She asks me, my heart does a little jump at the nickname

“Of course.” I say with a nod and smile, she smiles back then gets up to go to the bathroom.

I wait there for a couple minutes before she comes back, she doesn’t sit down tho

“I’m so sorry but I have to go, finneas just told me that I have some dumb ass interview tomorrow and I totally forgot about it.” She tells me, my smile drops

I get up from the chair I was in so we are now a little bit closer and face to face

“Okay um do you maybe want to get together again someti-“ she cuts me off before I can finish my sentence

“Uh Fuck yessss” she says, I laugh and nod

“Okay just text me yeah.” I tell her, she nods and bites her lip

I’ve been staring at her lips the entire time we’ve been here, am I honestly THAT whipped already? It’s only been 3 hours

She notices me staring and smirks a bit

“Follow me.” She says, she grabs my hand and our fingers interlock, I follow her as we go out the back door of the coffee shop and we stop at her car

“Get in babe.” She says, I smile and feel my heart start to beat a little faster

I get inside the car and start to laugh a little “What about finneas and your interview?” I ask her still giggling

She also starts to laugh and rolls her eyes

“He’ll have to come find my ass I guess and honestly fuck that interview they just ask you the same shit over and over.” She jokes

After we both got done laughing and calmed down we then sat in a comfortable silence

I can feel the tension growing a little

I look over a little to see her hand resting on her thigh, the rings on her fingers look so good... she looks so good, I bite my lip and start feeling bold

“I honestly really like you.” I say with a slight laugh, the laugh gets cut short because I can feel her hand gently turn my face to hers, our eyes meeting, and I can feel the coldness of her rings, oh shit I’m catching fucking feelings, she rubs my cheek with her thumb and smiles

“Kiss me.. I dare you.” She teases, she licks her lips and pulls her bottom lip between her teeth

My heart is beating fast and I smirk

“And if I don’t?” I ask, she leans in to me, our lips only centimeters apart

“Pussy.” She whispers jokingly, she presses her lips to mine and starts to kiss me softly

She’s so warm and soft, my heart melts and I’m on cloud 9, I’m way too soft for her

She pulls away, both of us a little breathless

She starts to smile which causes me to also smirk a bit

“Wow I guess I really can get it huh.” I say my breath still shaking a bit

“Oh my fucking god shut up, put your seatbelt on we are going on a fucking adventure.” She starts to laugh, she sits back in her seat and turns on the car.

My cheeks are burning and I can’t stop from smiling. She gets on the road and puts on music, she turns it up as loud as she can.

I get my phone from my back pocket and video her and I singing and acting like dumb asses and post it on my insta story and tagging her.... billie x y/n is going to be trending for awhile.

im sorry if this was bad 🥴 ew and I’m so slow lmao okay anyways 💞✨✨💞💞 😌oof and she’s(the story) also long tho

#billie eilish fics #billie #eilish #billie eilish #fic #cute #writing #imagine #im slow

[ellana-ravenwood]

Salt, Tequila, Lemon - Jason Todd x Reader

Please read this intro, thank you very much :  

So. I posted this yesterday, but after a bug on the Tumblr app on my phone it got deleted. I’m super bummed out because it had over 200 notes and quite a few feedbacks that I never got to read because it was accidentally deleted...If the people that took the time to comment things on the story could take a bit more time to write a little comment again and give me their feedbacks, and also if the people that liked and reblog could do it once more...i’d appreciate the hell out of you <3.  So reposting it (thanks god I always have back ups of all my stories now). Written in twenty minutes during my break at work. Bam. Hope you’ll like it :

Also, since Tumblr’s new guidelines and enforcement of it, I DON’T really appear in searches anymore, so the only way for this story to be seen by others than those who follow me is to reblog it. So if you wanna, you can show your support for my writing by doing just that. Thanks very much. You can find my masterlist here : @ella-ravenwood-archives

_________________________________________________

Ok. So. Grandma’s remedy against heartbreak ? Oh, right. 

Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 

Got it. Licking the back of your hand to make the salt stick to it, you pour yourself a massive shot of “To-Kill-Ya” in your coffee mug, not even caring about the fact that there is still some remnant of your cappuccino from last night in it. 

You focus on the sound the liquid makes as it fills your cup. Makes you think about something else. Good. Yup. This was totally gonna help right now. 

“Cheers”, you exclaim to yourself, your empty apartment echoing your voice. 

Salt. 

Wincing. Stingy. Salt on its own is gross. 

Tequila. 

More wincing. Oh my god, it burns. The coffee that was still at the bottom of the cup is an oddly nice touch. 

Lemon. 

The last of the Wincing. 

You spit the piece of lemon you just bit into in the trash and…miss. The yellow fruit falls with a little flat sound on the floor, and you honestly can’t bother to pick it up. Your apartment is a mess anyway, so you just stare at it angrily and pour yourself another drink. 

Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 

You gulp the last of the citrus and shiver. Miss the trash again. 

Damn. This was good. 

Well, actually, it was disgusting. 

You didn’t like strong alcohol and what the Hell ?! Why did you leave a bit of coffee in your cup ? Now that the aftertaste was kicking in, it was actually really gross. If the tequila itself didn’t make you wanna throw up, the stale coffee taste nearly did. Oh, and the salt and lemon combination was as awful as ever. 

You really didn’t like salt, tequila, or lemon. 

But it was still good. 

Because thanks to all this immediate awfulness, you could slowly feel yourself drift into “haze land”, and forget about your worries. 

Forget that your boyfriend of two years just cheated on you with some random woman you worked with. Woman that, by the way, he met at the Christmas “end of the year” party from you work you invited him to…You gave him free champagne and mise-en-bouche and all your love, and he broke your heart. 

It wasn’t your thing, to drink your sorrow away. And it wasn’t your thing either to wallow because of a man…But you genuinely thought he was “the one” (oh what a mistake you would soon realize that was). 

He was always so nice, treating you like a princess. He complimented you daily, and never forgot an important date. He was affectionate, not to an annoying point. He was the perfectamount of affectionate. He was a gentleman and seemed to love you and yet, he betrayed you. 

If a man like him, that was nothing short but sweet and passionate with you, cheated on you, then did that mean you couldn’t trust anyone ? 

Because in your eyes right now, he was perfect. Albeit said eyes were slightly clouded by a a few tequila shots. 

You were downing a fourth drink starting to slowly sob when…

There’s very few things that can get you out of a drunk state in seconds. 

An extremely cold shower could do the trick, for instance. Brings you back to your senses a bit you know ? You wouldn’t magically be sober, but you’d get a clearer mind. Or someone giving you shocking news ! Or like, an event so incredible that your body just forgets how drunk it is for a minute. 

And this event, for you, came at the perfect time. 

Right when you were entering your “sad drunk” phase, which was between the “lol alcohol does NOTHING to me” phase where you downed most of your drinks, and the “dancing on the bar’s counter” phase (a few more drinks and you would have a one woman dance party in your living room, acting as if you were on a bar’s counter and that your name was suddenly “Britney”).

Right when you were about to wallow times a thousand, and cry, and yell “whyyyyyyy ?!” to the sky, arms in the air (drama queen). 

Years later, looking back on that particular event, you’ll start to realize that Destiny HAS to exist. Because come on, it was just too perfect a timing to be a simple coincidence. 

You were about to swallow up your fifth drink, launching yourself head first into the “sad phase” when an ear shattering noise rang all around your apartment. 

Broken glass. 

It was the sound of broken glass. Heightened to the max by your drunkness. You turned on your stool, and…there he was. 

It was a guy. That you were sure of because he had no boobs and too much pecs. And that guy…well that guy just flew right through your window, destroying it. How rude. 

There was glass everywhere. 

How much did a window cost ? Probably a fortune. 

You wondered briefly if you could just use aluminium foil and tape the shit up. There was nothing of value to steal in your apartment anyway, and if aluminium foil could keep meals warm, it definitely worked with a house too right ? 

You sobered up quite a bit, but you were also very drunk when this event happened, so your mind was still in that cloudy weird phase where your priorities were…interesting. 

You worried more about the broken window at first, than about that guy who just launched through it. 

A guy. 

Not just any guy. 

You saw that guy before. 

He was one of those night vigilante your crazy hometown was filled with…RED HOOD !! 

“Thick thighs”, is the first thing you thought right after you recognized him (priorities). 

The second thing you thought was that you needed another drink, and so you downed what was your fifth one, but with that crazy thing happening ended up being on the same level as if it was a second one. You were tipsy, but not “drunk” anymore. 

The third thing that came to your mind was…Is he still alive ? 

No cause, he was like, just laying there, on your living room’s floor, not moving. 

“…Outch.” 

Oh. He spoke. 

So he ain’t dead. Good, means you can have another drink then, you don’t need a clear mind to call an ambulance or something. 

Oddly enough, in your half-drunk half-sober state, this sounded completely reasonable. Nevermind if Red Hood had some internal bleeding or something. He talked. He was probably fine. 

A minute passed, and you just sat there, sipping up your tequila in between taking a pinch of salt and biting into a piece of lemon. 

Salt, tequila, lemon. Great remedy against heartbreaks. 

Wait, were you heartbroken ? Really ? You couldn’t really recall that fact now. But, yeah…it was the reason why you were drinking right ? Because right now, all you could think about was the fact that this Red hood guy had abs for days…

This unforeseen event sobered you up quite a bit, but the two shots you just took kinda brought you back to the same state than you were before.

Well. Not quite. You were drunk as hell again, but seemed to have avoided the “sad phase”. Instead, Red Hood bursting quite literally through your window took you to another road. 

The : “Cool, I got a drinking buddy phase”. Well, taking for granted he didn’t have any internal bleeding and wouldn’t die while biting into a lemon wedge. 

“Tough day ?” 

You ask him, as he slowly sits up and shakes his head, trying to regain his senses. He looks towards you and seem surprised (or at least you think he is, because he wears a mask so…kinda hard to tell). 

************

Jason definitely thought he was alone in this place, because no sane person would just sit there, not saying anything, as someone simply jumped through their window. Nope, most people would just freak out. Scream. 

He knows, because it’s not the first time he falls through a window during a night on duty. And every single time it happened, people freaked out. Screamed. Threw stuffs at him, or hid away begging for their life to be spared. 

And yet here you were, half a bottle of tequila in front of you, surrounded by lemon wedges you bit into, and table salt all over your hand, just staring at him curiously. And did you just say : “tough day” ?  

Well, Jason guessed the empty half of the bottle was why you were so chilled about it all. He sat up, and slowly got back to his feet. 

Usually, going through a window meant the end of the night for him. He’d go back to one of his secret stash, patch himself up and get some rest. Most of the time, he fell through windows because someone pushed him or threw him there…Though today, he just embarrassingly missed a step and fell by himself. 

Of course, no one would ever now he tripped while jumping from one building to another (you lived on the last floor) and went careening into your home (and life). Nope, the official story would be that he fought a fierce enemy and was thrown into that window. Finding fake villains name was easy, given how truly ridiculous some could be. 

Tim and Damian were still after the “Illusive Blue Man” that he totally made up that one time he walked into a poll and had a huge black eye that he couldn’t quite explain…Oh man, he had to stop telling such elaborate lies and just say “I fought with a few guys last night” without more explanation. 

But he couldn’t help it. And those kids believed everything he said, it was too tempting…But for now, this wasn’t the issue. Nope. 

He did a quick check of his body and knew he wasn’t really hurt (thanks “dad” for the amazing body armor ugh ?), so he was planning on leaving that poor girl’s house and send a mystery check in the mail to pay for the damage (money stolen from a certain Bruce Wayne of course, as if he would pay himself). 

Yup. He was just gonna stand up, and go on his way and…somehow, he found himself sitting on the stool opposite side of this mysterious girl, and now she was peppering salt on his hand ? 

“Salt”, she says, and she has a cute drunk voice. Jason almost forgets he just went through a window a few minutes ago. 

“Tequila”, she continues, downing her drink and pointing at the one she poured him. He doesn’t even care the she poured it in a cereal bowl that she didn’t even seem to have clean…He drunk worst things in worst recipient. He turns away to take off his mask and so that she can’t see his face, and “bottom’s up”. 

“Lemon !” she finishes, biting into the sour fruit and spitting it in the direction of the trashcan but missing completely. The lemon wedge goes to lost itself amongst his fallen brothers…

Jason bites into his own lemons, and spits it. Right into the garbage. 

There’s a slight pause, where she just stares at the trashcan, and then at Jason, back to the trashcan, and then turns to him again and simply says : 

“Wow.” 

************

So. This was surreal. 

Here you were. In your home. Taking tequila shots. With…Red Hood. 

One of Gotham’s night vigilante. The most violent one. But the dude seemed chilled. He was holding his liquor really well. 

And now you were talking about your broken heart, telling him the story as if he’d been your friend for years. And he was listening. Intently. And reacting to what you were saying. It had been a LONG time, since you had this kind of talk with anyone, and despite the fact you were drunk, you still noticed how nice it felt to have someone to talk to. Someone that genuinely listened. 

“And then he slept with her !” you say angrily. 

“Nooooooo !?!” 

“Yes, he did ! He slept with…with…what was her name…”

“Nicole. From accounting.” 

“Right, Nicole from accounting ! That bitch ! She always just…counts and shit ! And he slept with her ! Nicole from accounting ! Whom he met thanks to me, by the way ! At a partyyyy !! At my wooooork !!” 

“What an ass.” 

“Right ?! Oh but he had such a good ass though…Quite firm. But whenever he wore jeans, it was super flat.” 

“So, not such a good ass in the end then ?” 

“I guess not. You have a good ass. Popping right out in this outfit of yours.” 

Red Hood chuckles, and the sound of his laughter makes you forget that you just said something incredibly embarrassing. His voice is…nice. Deep. Manly. You like it. You wanna make him chuckle some more, so you say, hoping : 

“And it looks very firm. Not just quite firm.” 

It works. He snorts and it’s very cute. Oh wow. He can be sexy and cute. Full package. You smile a bit dreamily. 

For a second, he’s lost in that smile of yours, and there’s a silence installing itself in the room. A comfortable one. That you break : 

“Ok. So now, he’s not that perfect anymore ! He got no ass ! Penalty points ! I never notice how un-assed he was before…” 

Jason smiles and damn. He’s hot. 

Somewhere along the way, he stopped turning his face away from you whenever he took a shot, and just ended up taking his helmet off. He was probably hoping that you’d black out or something, so you wouldn’t remember his face (or he just didn’t care). 

In any case, you were pretty sure you never saw him before. His face kinda reminded you of an old memory. Of someone you saw somewhere long ago, when you were a kid…Which wasn’t really a big help right ? 

Right. You had no idea who he was. And in your drunken state, probably couldn’t piece anything together anyway. So even if you did know who he could be, you wouldn’t know in the end anyway…Makes perfect sense right ?

What you knew was : he’s hot. 

This white streak in his hair did something to you that you couldn’t explain. And that jawline ? You would love to get cut on that bitch.  It could actually cut a bitch, you were sure of it. Those blue eyes ? You’ve never seen someone with such blue eyes. And did you mention to yourself how muscular he was ? Because man you only saw guys like this in magazines ! 

But beyond his handsome features, he seemed like a nice guy. Like he was listening to you, a total stranger. And this realization suddenly raised your guard up. 

You also thought that your ex-cheating-boyfriend was a nice guy. And come to think of it, who the hell just barge in someone’s home like that, and actually stay to drink tequila shots ?! Wait but…in your guts…it’s not like with your ex. 

You don’t think he’s a nice guy. You know he is. 

************

There’s a visible shift in your mood, after this realization. So far, you talked to him about your broken heart freely, and he listened. 

Oddly enough, no words that came out of your (perfect) mouth bored him. Jason wasn’t sure wether it was the alcohol or not, but you captivated him. 

But in a split second, and without him knowing why, your features changed. You were now frowning. Like an unhappy little kid. It was kinda cute, but he didn’t like it because…why were you frowning ? 

He tries to lighten up the mood and says : 

“Well here you go. See, you didn’t loose the perfect guy, his ass was flat in jeans. Can’t work with that, can you ? I bet we can find other flaws. Make you realize he actually was a looser.”  

Your guard is up, but you can’t help but smile a bit, plus you were frowning just now because you realized you just knew you could trust that total stranger, and it was so weird…. 

Besides, no harm in indulging this, because you’re pretty sure it’ll make you feel better to try and see the bad side of your ex-boyfriend, not just his good ones. No one was perfect. And so, still a bit careful, you say : 

“Well…He never got any of my Tv shows or movie references.” 

“Well, here’s a point to take off of his “perfectness”. Doesn’t get pop culture references. Deal breaker.” 

“Yeah…Yeah you’re right. It is. He also used to hate when I made jokes. I like puns ya know ? Terrible ones. Well, he was always embarrassed whenever I made them in public.” 

“Ashamed of his girlfriend, doesn’t sound very gentlemanly, right ?” 

“Yeah. It doesn’t. Maybe he wasn’t such a perfect gentleman…He also used to not want to go out with me if I didn’t wear any make-up and was dressed just casually.” 

“What you mean, he never just went out with you ?” 

“We only went out on dates. I had to dress up. I could be casual home though…” 

“Well goodie, the man let you be yourself when you were home. Big deal. To be honest, sounds like a douchey move.” 

“That was kinda douchey…I never cared what he looked like.” 

And it’s true. For you, physical appearance wasn’t everything. And sure you thought your ex was hot and all, but only because you liked his personality too. You liked his jokes, you were never ashamed of anything he said. 

And right now, sure that stranger that bursted through your window was hot, but the reason you felt like you could tell him things was because he just made you comfortable by his mere aura. Because he gave you such a good vibe. 

You never were fully about appearances. It was always just a bonus for you…So it never occurred to you why your ex would only hang out in public with you if you were pampered. Like he used to hate when you just wore hoodies and no make-up, even if you didn’t need make-up to be beautiful. 

Comes to think of it, he was very much about appearances…Uh. Interesting. You never realized that before. 

You turn to Red Hood, and the look on your face says it all. You’re slowly realizing maybe you didn’t just lost “the one”. The vigilante says : 

“Ok, so : no ass, no humor apparently, doesn’t get pop culture references, and was kind of a jerk when it came to going out with you…” 

“He did tell me often that I was beautiful though. Including when I just woke up from a night out, and was awful looking.”

“Yeah, but he never went out with you looking like that. He shouldn’t feel ashamed of hanging out with you looking like that. Just like he shouldn’t feel embarrassed when you joke. He can be exasperated, like if you really make bad puns, sure. And he can think it’s unfunny…But embarrassed ? No.” 

“I guess…I never thought about it.” 

“Well let me tell you, as someone who does not know neither you nor him personally, he sounds like a bit of a jerk. Let’s not forget he cheated as well. Like, that’s not something good people do. Especially not with…Nicole from accounting.” 

“Nicole from accounting…Yeah. They’re together now though.” 

“So ? He should’ve broken up with you if he realized he liked her. That’s the right thing to do. Trust me on that, I put villains behind bars for a living, I know what’s right or wrong.” 

“I heard you kill criminals.” 

“Used to. I used to kill criminals, I had issues. I’ll tell you one day if you wanna. It’s a real tear jerker story. With clowns and crowbars. And I’m telling you that because I’m drunk, right now. Also, if we want to be specific, I don’t actually make a living out of putting villains behind bars. Like, I don’t get paid or anything…” 

Jason finds himself ranting about anything that comes to his mind, and though he hears himself claim it’s because of the alcohol he’s saying all this, he realizes maybe there’s something else making him want to talk. 

You. A total stranger he walked upon. Or rather, went-through-the-window upon.  Who didn’t freak out when he went through said window. And instead, invited him over to have tequila shots. 

Because, according to your grandmother, the best remedy to…basically any problems in life, was “salt, tequila, lemon”. 

“She was a wise woman.” 

He says, and you turn to him, clearly not understanding what he was talking about. 

“Who ?” 

“Your grandma. For saying that salt, tequila and lemon was a great remedy against heartbreaks and all.” 

“Oh. Yeah. I wouldn’t know, I never met her. She died before I was born.” 

“Well what she passed on to your parents is great.” 

“What ?”

“Well, that “salt, tequila and lemon” thing, I assume she said that to your mom or dad, and then they said that to you, and then it became your grandma’s advice. Right ?” 

“…Nah. It’s an excuse I made up. Whenever I need to justify something, I just say “like my grandma said, ain’t no shame in eating an entire tub of ice cream if you want to”, and then people are just like “oh yeah, cool”, because when you say the word “grandma”, then it gives a perspective to your words ya know ?” 

Jason had no idea what you were on about, but he loved it. You seemed to be very smart. And witty. And funny. The hell did that guy cheated on you for ? And why was he ashamed of going out in public with you when you weren’t dressed up ?! 

You currently wore “Hello Kitty” pyjamas, had absolutely no make up on, and your hair was a mess, and he thought you looked gorgeous.

“Why are you so nice ?” 

Your question takes him by surprise, and for a few seconds he doesn’t register it and just says : “ugh ?” 

“To me. Why are you so nice to me ? Is it the alcohol ? Does it make you nice ? Or are you just nice to every stranger ? Every girl you destroy the windows of ? Or are you like my ex ? You seem nice, but then you go off and cheat on your girl simply because you like another girl and you’re too cowardly to break up with your current girl ?” 

Jason hiccups slightly, and says : 

“No, I’m not nice to any girl I met. I’m actually usually kind of a jerk, too “brutally honest”. But you…I don’t know. You give me good feelings. Oh and here’s to add on his flaws list. “Coward”. Can’t even break up with a girl, has to wait to get caught red-handed and break her heart. Cooooward. Bad flaw. Kind of guy who runs in the face of danger, instead of standing by you.” 

It’s probably the fact that he said “you give me good feelings” that spurs this in you. That gives you a new clearer perspective on things. 

“My heart wasn’t broken.”

It’s a shock, to you. This realization. This sudden feeling jumping in your face. You…are not heartbroken. You’re mad. You’re frustrated. You feel betrayed. You feel a crazy burning anger towards your ex for toying around with you like that. For not having the balls to just break up, after spending two years together. 

He was suppose to know you. To be your friend. Things could have turned out better. He could have just come up to you, say the truth, and…You were pretty sure you’d still be friend. Because he really was a great guy. 

He really was all the good thing you though about him. He made a mistake, an unforgivable one in your book. But he was a great guy. 

He was just…not your great guy. Not anymore at least. 

And you realized, there, quite drunk, that…It was ok.  

Your heart wasn’t broken.  

Your heart wasn’t broken. 

Your pride was. Your trust was. But your heart ? …Maybe you weren’t completely in love with him. You were best friends, yes, but love ? Maybe it wasn’t love…

Your heart wasn’t broken. 

“My heart isn’t broken.” 

You tell Red hood, looking at him right in his wonderful ocean blue eyes. And he looks right back at you, and just nods. Just like that. And then he pours you one last tequila shot. 

Because like your grandma would say : “When you make great discovery about yourself…Salt, tequila, lemon”. 

************

It took you only a few hours with him to realize that you weren’t in love with your ex, and that was kinda scary. Because this realization didn’t come from nowhere. 

Nope. 

But when he said that your ex broke your heart, you felt obligated to tell him that no. No your heart wasn’t broken. You were sad and angry, yes, but not heartbroken. For you, in that moment, it was important for this total stranger to know you weren’t actually in love. 

Hell, you didn’t even know yourself you weren’t that in love before you talked to him. It just came as a sudden, yet utterly true revelation. 

Because, and this wasn’t the alcohol speaking…You felt incredibly attracted to that guy. To Red Hood. Not just because of the white streak in his hair, and the eyes, and smile, and voice, and abs, and thick thighs. That too, sure, but not only…Nope. 

Nope. Not because of this. 

But because he had a tough day (he said so himself, explaining to you how he went through the window…he was fighting a super-villain when he got flung through your window, tough tough time ahem), and yet he sat with a crazy lady that peppered salt on his hand and practically forced him to take a tequila shot…

Because you could see in his eyes, and felt in your guts that he didn’t have an easy life…and yet he took a break from whatever he was doing to just sit with you and listen to you. He didn’t even make sense, that you trusted those feelings so fiercely. And yet, you did. Because he listened to you. 

He saw you were struggling and he stayed. And though you felt you couldn’t trust anyone at that time…You oddly felt like he was ok. 

Like he wouldn’t be the kind of guy to cheat, or run in the face of danger, leaving you all alone to fight off demons. 

In a few short hours, you fell for this guy more than you ever fell for your ex. 

What did that say about you uh ? …That was pretty pathetic…

************

Jason didn’t think that you were pathetic at all. 

On the contrary. If he went to seat with you, and drink with you, is because he was instantly mesmerized by you. 

And though he didn’t know at first why, now he was sure of it. 

It’s because you didn’t freak out. And something told him it wasn’t only because you were a bit drunk (he fell in drunk people’s home before…none reacted like you). 

Nope. It was because you were special. He just knew it. Special in every way. Funny. Beautiful. Genuinely listening to him when he was speaking. 

He peppered his own problems within your story, as you told him. And you listened. Hell, even referenced a few things he said early on, way later, while you were crazy drunk. You listened. 

You gave a total stranger that seemed to have a tough day some salt. And tequila. And lemons. 

And then you cared. You asked him a thousand times if he was ok, and he basically had to take off his armor to prove it so (to your eyes’ greatest pleasure…mm mm mm those muscles). 

Captivated. He was captivated by you. It was strange, and though he knew it was because you were special, he still was unclear as to why his feelings were that strong. 

For someone he just met. And barely knew. And only knew while drunk. 

You were just…Special. 

************

It was surreal. The all thing. 

What started as a night where you planned on wallowing your pain and drinking…ended up changing your life. 

And no one could convince you that it wasn’t Fate. Because what were the odds that Red Hood would fall through YOUR window after tripping (yeah you didn’t buy that “fighting super-villains thing” at all) ?

What were the odds of his timing being so perfect, arriving just before you started to cry ? Because there was no doubt in your mind that if he had come a few seconds later, he wouldn’t have stayed. 

He would have found a crying mess, and maybe he would have tried to confort you but…You wouldn’t have answered. In your “sad phase”, you only cry and whine. He would have eventually left. And the wonderful talk you’d just have, would never have happened. 

But instead. He came right before your lips touch that fatal shot of tequila that would have brought you into the “sad phase”. And took your drunkness down a notch. Rerouted your evening. 

You weren’t wallowing anymore, you were ranting. 

Sharing your anger and frustration. 

And he helped you realize that your ex wasn’t that perfect…That maybe it was just not meant to be…After all, he cheated on you. 

Uh. What a shame. You didn’t even know his name…”Red Hood”…

You wished you knew his name. 

************

The morning lights were rising, and the bottle of tequila was long gone. 

There were still salt and lemons though. For some reason, you decided to buy the entire grocery store’s stock of lemons. 

Red Hood stood up, and said he had to go. 

He was nice about it. Said it was a pleasure to have spend the night with you. You both laughed about the innuendos that ensued. 

You were exactly on the same page. And he understood all your joke referencing to pop culture… 

But it was time for him to go. And he apparently had no intention of telling you his real name. He didn’t hint either at ever coming back to see you again. 

And there was that. Just a nice night, spend talking to a genuine friend that you’ll never see again. 

A genuine friend that you didn’t even know a few hours before. 

Maybe it was the alcohol speaking. Maybe not. 

And even if you ended up never seeing him again, this evening truly changed your life…At least, it saved you from a heartbreak. Made you realize it wasn’t that.

Though, now, as he climbs out of the window again (he couldn’t possibly use the front door), you feel like the actual heartbreak is starting. 

Grandma’s remedy against heartbreak ? Right. 

Salt, tequila, lemon…

But the tequila is all gone. 

“I’ll send someone to fix that window…Sorry again about that. …Bye.” are his last words, and then he’s out. 

And the tequila is all gone. 

************

… 

…

…

…

Days pass by in a blur. 

Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 

Ugh. But you don’t want to this time. You don’t want to get drunk to forget. 

You don’t want to forget him. And you know it’s ridiculous to get that worked up over a guy you met one night and that will never come back. That you didn’t even know the name of. 

This entire night was weird anyway. 

Getting drunk with a dangerous night vigilante. Pouring your heart out to him, and him doing the same. The hell were you even thinking ? 

Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 

That would be a good idea to do this right now, because man…your heart hurt. More than when you discovered your ex sleeping with Nicole. From accounting. But you can’t resolve yourself to drink. To forget. Nope. Instead you…

*Knock knock knock*. 

Uh ? You take a quick look at your clock in the kitchen.10 pm. Who the hell is coming at 10 pm ?! It can only be bad news. Especially in Gotham…You peep into the eyehole and…

WHAT ?! 

You open your door quickly, and… 

“Told you I’d send someone to fix your window.” 

It’s him. It’s Red hood. But in…civilian clothes. 

His ass doesn’t look flat in jeans. 

He’s holding a window wrapped in cardboard, and there’s a toolbox at his feet. 

“Yeah, you did…come in.” 

************

Jason Todd. 

That’s his name. And connections are fast to be made in your brain. Jason Todd. Bruce Wayne’s adopted son. That supposedly died…ten years ago. 

And is Red Hood now. Oh. It makes sense. Even his little “killing criminals” thing while Batman never killed. You easily put two and two together. 

Red Hood. Jason Todd. Bruce Wayne. 

Wow. Can’t believe you never guessed that before. Of course Bruce Wayne is Batman. He’s got the motive, the means, the excuses…It’s so obvious. And yet, you never realized. And no one else in Gotham ever realized. 

Jason Todd. 

Now you know his name. 

And he’s fixing your window. Nobody ever fixed windows for you before (even those who broke it).

Um. To add to the “perfect man” list : “Handy”. 

Jason Todd.  

He quickly works the window up, and then he turns to you. While he was working you talked, as if you knew each other for years. Joking around. Like old friends. Like old extremely good and close friends. 

It fits. It clicks. It’s natural. You and him, him and you. 

Barely knowing each others, and yet knowing each others the best. 

Jason. Todd. 

He turns to you now, and with a smirk, he says : 

“Ya know, my grandma always say that when something good happens to you, you need to celebrate. And I feel like this, right now, you and I, though I have no idea what we’re doing and where it’s going…Well it’s still something to celebrate. And she always says, my grandma, that to celebrate perfectly you need…” 

You smile. 

Yeah. You don’t know where this thing between you two is going, but you do know that you never met someone who so fully understood you. 

And in such a short span of time. And you know you’re not mistaking. It’s a feeling too strong to be a mistake. 

He came back to fix your window for god’s sake. And trusted you enough to tell you his actual name. Without a second thought. Which meant everything. Especially since from all the hint he let slip through last time you saw each others, about his father, well…let’s just say telling people his real name wasn’t really something he was used to. 

But it just works. It fits. It clicks. It’s not like with your ex, because you don’t think you know it does. It just does. The fact that you say those next few words in perfect sync finishes to convince you : 

(“…And she always says, my grandma, that to celebrate perfectly you need…”) 

“Salt, tequila, and lemons.” 

______________________________________________

I’m so mad the Tumblr app crashed and I deleted the original post...Y’all were great and reblogged the hell out of it ! Which is why it got so many notes in such a short span of times. And feedbacks. I haven’t had that many feedbacks on a story in a long time. So just one last time and I won’t bother you with that again : Please, if you enjoyed this story, don’t hesitate to reblog it and share it with others. People who don’t follow me can’t really find my stories anymore so...you’re a big help by spreading them. It’s always very encouraging. 

And if you got the time, feedbacks are always hella appreciated and always make my day a little brighter <3. 

#Jason Todd x Reader #Jason Todd #Jason Todd imagine #Red Hood x Reader #Jaybird #Jay Todd #Jason Peter Todd #Best Robin #Fight me #Red Hood imagine #Red Hood fanfiction #Jason Todd fanfiction #Jason Todd reader insert #Jason Todd deserves more love #Red Hood reader insert #Jason Todd fanfic #Batfam #Batfamily #Batfam x Reader #Batfamily x Reader #Batfam imagine #Batfamily imagine #JASON TODD IS GREAT OK ?!

[thethirdwheel404]

Med Rewatch Series (#1)

Right, monkey brain said no sleep no rest, only suffering at the hands of med.

I am going to start with the first episode of S2: Soul Care. Reasoning? I need to check if Latham references Ava in his first interaction with Connor.

If my memory serves me right, when Connor is passed over to Latham for his fellowship, Latham says that he was not his first choice. In fact, his first choice was a brilliant surgeon from South Africa. In the first episode of S2, a season where Ava Bekker is only introduced with one line at the end of the last episode.

If I remember correctly and Latham does actually say that in the first ep of s2, it will be huge for the continuity (and my theory that I came up with today, if you’re interested in following this you should really read that really long post that came a little before this where the basis of the theory is laid out). 

Also in rewatching this I see more of Sarah which, again, I have not seen in two years, and she was the reason I became invested in the show, and the reason I stopped watching after she left.

And all of this even before I start the episode.

There are so many emotions and thoughts running through my brain it literally hurts. I think i’m getting a headache. I’m already really regretting this, this cannot be healthy for me.

(btw, this will basically be a train of thought type thing, I’ll do my best to keep it coherent)

- omg its starting

- i completely forgot how s1 ended but its not importnat in anyway

- just, why are they in a helicopter

- how fast does the episode move ive forgotten and i need to know

-JESUS CHRIST SO DRAMATIC

- THE BEGINNING WITH WILL WHY

- it is at this point where I apologize to all those who made it this far bc we’re literally not even 30 seconds in yet

- i just have a lot of med thoughts

- oh god save me

- i am laughing hysterically

- JESUS CHRIST THE APRIL TB STORYLINE AND TATE WTF

- god that feels like a lifetime ago it was relevant holyshit

-remember when she was pregnant?

- literally what have I missed

- side note, i really like the cup april drinks out of.

-THERE SHE IS

-SARAH

-SHE’S HERE

-and she’s a barista

-literally wtf is this show

-and the dramatic music is still going literally chill man god

-THE WAY SARAH SMILES HOLY SHITTTT come on man there was literally no way i’d survive this but fuck not even a minute in...

- okay but i never understood charles’ family scenario but this is already too fucking long for a minute in so i hope we can just skip past that

-hahahah sharon’s fucking divorce? holy shit, this is too dramatic for the first ep literally save me (at least she acts well)

-yeah the one thing I will say about med (thats a lie ive already said a hundred but yk) is that for the crap storylines and all, the actors take what they’re given and give it their all and i appreciate it so much

-the helicopter’s number is N365UCC and just... succ

-ethans bird (!)

-also the fact that’s so big for ethan to be chief resident is so weird to me. like the last medical drama I watched was greys and they are all like grizzled veterans and have been doing that stuff for actual decades and i tend to put med and greys on like the same level bc they are the only medical dramas ive watched but.. holy crap the people on med are so young?? half their main cast is med students and residents. when nearly every main character on greys is a department head. its wild.

-proud of ethan. proud of my boy (did you know that adam jacobs who played aladdin on broadway was in a s3 episode? fun facts) (fun fact: did you know that ava is the only main character on the show who’s status is now deceased? I’ll shut up now.)

-oh my god i say roland buck III’s name and GOD noah jesus

- i find noah incredibly annoying, especially bc he tries to overshadow reese (my fav) but also just bc hes spoiled [that thing that said that one of the biggest mistakes med made was not having sarah get the emergency med residency at the end of s1 comes to mine, and the fact that noah got his residency easy peasy] - but, i will say that the moment at the end of this season where noah and reese dance together at the party is very adorable. (pre reesker brain showing lmao I really did love sarah with my whole heart) (moreover my snapchat memories were filled with just recordings of reese scenes lmaooooo)

-okay at this point I need to stop once i get to the potential ava thing bc what is happening we’re not even two minutes in why is this so long. (so many thoughts)

- i find will annoying but,,, he is kind of nice to look at. and what i mean is like facial acting (i am a lesbian). like. just. don’t speak. and when he’s being a good character he’s fine. it’s very few and very far between ig

-natalie annoys me so much and shes only had one line, and it wasn’t even a character line, it was mainly exposition.

-EW

-FUCKING EW

-ITS CONNOR HE’S HERE. god i forgot what he looked like in red scrubs and his poofy hair. child compared to s3 and s4. hopefully we see latham soon so we all don’t have to suffer through this. and he looks so angsty. he definetly glowed up in the later seasons.

- i have no clue how to spell definetly. I am guessing literally everytime.

-latham please come and end this all.

-oh haha there’s downey hes dead.

-okay so i actually watched s1 after i watched s2 which is so weird to think about. like that means that i liked s2 so much that i BOUGHT THE DVD FOR S1. yeah. I liked it that much (it really only means I was that much of a simp for sarah). but it also means that technically i watched s1 after i met ava?? like i honestly had NO CLUE what was in my future. did young me ever think she was going to stay up late at night, avoiding history hw while analyzing a defunct character from this show on a whim? a character i was super annoyed with at the beginning? who has no become a huge part of my personality? honestly? no. no she did not.

-and the story with downey was so jarring. and the story with zanetti. like i think i first started watching with the first ep of s2 (the one im talking about rn) and i was a bit lost. so going back and watch s1 to like connect the dots. but i never expected the dots to look like that. its like each season of this show is a completely different show from all the other seasons. like i’ve said before, this show is a headache. but literally latham please come and end this for now.

-GOD CONNOR LOOKS SO YOUNG WHAT THE HELL thats so weird lmaooooo

- like i had absolutely no clue who downey was going into this. and they they started talking like ‘oh yeah he killed his attending’ and i was just like ‘damn bro ill cheers to that’

- that’s literally ava’s first line actually. “i heard your girlfriend went insane and you murdered your attending.” - which was why she was hated at first. that was literally her first line to connor which is like, so hilariously rude that it was instantly iconic.

-also HAHAHAHAH CUE FUCKING ANGST ABOUT CONNOR HURTING EVERYONE AROUND HIM WTF BRO THE EFFECT YOU HAVE ON PEOPLE

- but i’m also sad now. --- “I heard your girlfriend went insane.” Oh. Oh, sweetie. Ava... No. --- but why does s2 ava (all two lines) foreshadow s4 ava in so many ways. like literally what were the writers on.

-baghdad.

-ah yes. the return of baghdad. been a long time since i heard that one, but it is easily one of my favorite running things about med. its just a little detail but the nick name is like perfect. (when i read fanfic where the chars are actually doing doctor stuff in the hospital it makes me light up) the WORLD BUILDINGGGGG. but whatever

-this is the girl who has the fake baby right? that was a really good ep (bc sarah content. can you see my favorites? for the same reason the one where the girl has split personalities easily ranks high with me.) oh wait this is the one where the dad like dies but then comes back for a split second to see his grand child. there’s not really a lot I can say about that, but the fact that i remember it vividly is... weird.

-okay but I actually love the ED in this show. I love how the show is centered around the ED and not the OR like greys. its fast paced, you see a lot about the characters really quickly (one of the reason’s connor’s intro to the hospital in the pilot is certified iconic in my mind [his interactions with will are gold]). the team works well together (usually, when things are good. - which is another reason I hated the show more as time went on. The personal lives interfered more and more and more with their work as time went on. it got so annoying). but like right here will just calls maggies name and maggie is just On It. I love it. I love the fast pace. it’s why this show got me to come back. so many things happen, it overloads my brain, like the way a video game works y occupying all of your attention.

-when is the dad gonna pass out i’m just waiting

-AHAHAHAHAHA JEFF NOOOOO. what even was the deal with jeff that storyline annoyed me so much I never got it. he was friends with nat’s husband (who died) and they were both named Jeff? and she actually ended up getting with Jeff a few times?

- the more you watch med and see how the characters get with each other, the more jaded you become

-omg they’re transferring the girl to the bed i love it when they count

-maggie was great but from what i heard/read they ruined her character too??? just not the same

-lmao only real g’s remember the chicago fire backdoor med pilot (if you want an explanation ask me lmao it was a ride)

- i was a real med simp bc I bought that episode on apple video.

-ahahaha this is so stupid. Jeff tries to do things and Will (being a fucking asshole and jealous, doesnt’ let him). he’s a med student let him fucking learn. also i remember why i hated will

-okay but if you look at greys vs. med, greys literally gives their med students no rights. scratch that. they give they’re interns little to no rights. (i only watched the last three seasons bc lesbian, but in those seasons they introduce the bottom of the totem pole, the sub I’s, who are a step ahead of med students, yet they are jokes on the show.) its just a weird juxtaposition is all.

-”lungs are wet.” dramatic music intensifies.

-OKAY BUT I LITERALLY FORGOT NATALIE SPECIALIZED IN PEDS. LIKE I COMPLETELY 100% FORGOT. HOLY SHIT THATS SO FUNNY i can’t believe in my mass hyperfixation i forgot, just more proof that she doesn’t deserve anything.

-why did will make nat do that call? also idk why but is it weird to anyone else when the characters call each other but just.. their names.

-ahahahah i laugh literally everytime i remember that will is supposed to be in charge like he is threatened by anything that MOVES. (also more juxtapositon to greys bc here the attendings are treated as a joke!)

- hly shit i just remember monday mourning and god damn the angst literally never takes a day off but whatever.

- i dont usually get like this but the dad’s acting here is actually making me sad lol. Usually i get annoyed when family members get emotional (im weird uhhhh)

-why did we have to watch the tube being put in for so long - med is so dramatic this fucking show whyyyy

- i bet u the dad is gonna pass out

-oh ig not oops

-OKAY FUCK ME THAT LITERALLY ONLY TOOK US TO THE TITLES HOW DO I HAVE THESE MANY FUCKING THOUGHTS.

-wait latham introduction we may just be able to call it here.

-haha i fucking hate him (connor). he just... comes off so fake-charming its annoying. i cant get over it lmao

-okay but literally every gives connor shit and I am here for it. Latham: “did you kill him?”

- it is literally so funny but annoy how connor throws hands with literally everyone in his path (like dude just chill come onnn)

-okay. okay. okay. finally the part i was waiting for.

- Latham: I preferred a young woman from Groote Schuur, but I was outvoted.

That’s an actual quote, from Latham. For those who are wondering, Groote Schuur is a famous hospital in, you guessed it, South Africa. This is where I’m calling the episode. This is all I needed.

I just want to restate. This is the first episode of season 2. Ava Bekker is introduced to the show in the last episode of season 2. What does this mean, my friends? It means everything.

For those of you who stuck through to the end, I am very thankful. Here we have probably the first piece of evidence to my theory, at least chronologically.

I, personally, think it’s absurd I remembered this point, but I did. That point, that line, presently, watching this episode with no idea of what the future holds, is only there to tell us that Latham and Connor are not going to agree. But this is the single greatest piece of foreshadowing med has ever done.

Med has never planned anything. I feel confident when I say that. Look at their storylines. They are literally on fire, and every decision the characters make reads like the writers going ‘we have no idea how we made it this far, we thought we would get stopped like ten steps ago.’

When has med ever planned things more than a few episodes in advanced, honestly? Almost never, and going a full season sitting on a plot point, that’s major. This was the first time med has ever planned something miles in advance.

In all honestly, yes I am probably giving the med writers a lot more credit than they deserve. It’s quite possible that as the season progressed they just decided connor needed a new love interest or at least a new dynamic, so they could have just easily looked back and thought ‘oh, hey, here’s a fun little thing we said earlier in the season, wouldn’t it be fun if it paid off?’ That could be true.

Here’s why it probably isn’t. The med writers have no respect for their own continuity. you really think that, in order to come up with a whole new character, they went back to the first episode of the season and paid off a line that is said in less than 2 seconds? no way. Bull. Shit.

honestly, it is probably equally unlikely that either of these things happened. The med writers don’t look back at their story. It’s true, but they also don’t plan things in advance either.

here’s the thing, the more i write, the more absurd it starts to sound. Yeah. Sure. the med writers sat on a character for an entire season, that’s totally a thing that happened and not sarcasm. When pigs fly. everyone knows med is impulsive and messy. But what I am saying is that they planned one thing. One thing.

Ava has an accent. That was a commitment. A pretty uncommon one too. South Africa is such an out of the box choice that god its barely on the map. It asks a lot of someone to act hard while also doing an uncommon accent. If the med writers just decided they needed to give connor a new dynamic, they could have made it a n y o n e. Yeah, sure it would have been nice to have the latham dynamic with the new character, but it would have been so much easier to just create a new character that doesn’t have such a commitment. We all know people who play opposite of Connor Rhodes do not stay around that long.

There is absolutely no reason Connor’s s3 love interest had to be the girl from South Africa. It could have literally been anyone. They could have kept Robin on. They could have made the new character not have so many specific requirements.

At this point, I’m pushing this really hard. Yeah, obviously Ava was planned from the beginning of s2. She had to be. It’s way too specific to be anything else.

What I’m pointing out here is med has never done that before. (at least to my knowledge, if i’m wrong please tell me i don’t want to be a fool) They have never had such a concrete plan for a character, so much as to tease them a full season before they were introduced.

I’m saying, that Ava was special. She was the only character who was teased ahead of her arrival. The one who they knew they wanted, other than the originals, and honestly saying the ‘knew what they wanted to do with the originals’ is being generous. But Ava was different. They had big plans for Ava.

It’s undeniable. Ava was the only character who was planned and teased ahead of her arrival. Ava has such a different style and character than anyone else on the show. She was always planned to be, even when she was just being teased, a rival to connor, meaning she could stand her own against him (or without him).

Now of course, the med writers forgot this when writing s4 and s5. But for the purposes of the important things, all that really matters are the two mentions in s2, and what happens in s3. (for the theory at least).

In conclusion: think about how odd it is that Ava was the only character that was planned over the course of the show. Like sure the characters are planned, but never this far in advance. Med writers don’t really plan anything. I would be shocked if they did anything but through a dart at a spinning wheel. But they had plans for Ava, and they had plans for s3, when she was good.

Think about how odd it is that the med writers had a character planned from the start of s2, that they sat on for a whole season. They never, ever did something so slow and deliberate. Never. It goes against their formula. Like a fucking shark, they have to be moving or they die, at least in their heads. But Ava was always a change to the formula. They had a plan for s3.

that’s it for now. we will see what happens when i watch the last episode of s2.

read the next parts:

Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10 / Part 11 / Part 12 / Extra

#chicago med #med rewatch series #mine #soul care #ava bekker

[kpop-rambles]

Goodbye 2019. Hello 2020.

To celebrate the new year - which a lot of people are celebrating right now, I’m sure, unfortunately not me yet - I decided to create this post. I don’t know how to explain it but if you like kpop, keep reading!

My Top 3 Songs of 2019

1. SKZ - Miroh

This song got me into my now ult group, Stray Kids. Those 9 boys have honestly made this year 10x better for me. Chan’s VLives definitely helped me when I was upset, and the members made me feel emotions by their side. I’m so glad that add of Miroh appeared and I chose to watch it because I may have not gotten into Stray Kids without it. 

2. ATEEZ - Wave

Again, another song that got me into the group. I heard the song in a video where they played huge jenga at Kcon... I think? Anyways, this song is another banger and you completely fall in love with it first listen. You won’t regret listening to this.

3. TWICE - Fancy

I got into TWICE when they released YES OR YES, but FANCY is the song that you can’t not fall in love with. I did on my 2nd listen and man, if you’re saying you didn’t learn the dance and bopped to this song, you are LYING because- let’s be honest - everyone said FANCY SOTY. 

Groups I began stanning in 2019 its felt like forever tho

Stray Kids - March 26th. You think I would forget? 

ATEEZ - August 18th. Another date I remember, because I spent a good 2 hours getting to memorize the members name and faces. Was so happy when I finally did it. 

iKON - Honestly, I was more of a Double B stan since January until Hanbin left. I loved their songs but I never got to know the rest of the members, except for Jinhwan. 

ChungHa - Snapping dragged me in. That’s all I gotta say. Although, ngl, Gotta Go was something I always tried to dance to. 

KARD - Again, Bomb Bomb just pulled me into the fandom. The rest of their discography made me stay. I sang along to Bomb Bomb everyday for a good 3 months. It was honestly EVERYTHING to me and then Dumb Litty came and stole my heart and KARD did it AGAIN.

Mamamoo - gogobebe. Do I really need to say anything else?

GOT7 - I’m pretty sure I got into them because, well everyone knows GOT7. They’re a name everyone knows if you like kpop, so I just wanted to get into them. Eclipse and You Calling My Name are songs I’ll dance and singalong to in the right mood and right part of the song. But their personalities dragged me in. I’m pretty sure BamBam also attracted me when he was on Stray Kids reality show. 

Day6 - Time Of Our Life. I decided to listen to it because Seungmin of Stray Kids was a big fan of them and I was like, it shouldn’t hurt to try. Seungmin made me want to watch and Day6 made me want to stay. They don’t make ANY bad songs. 

Everglow - March 18. Listened to Bon Bon Chocolat when it came out, and I was honestly scared ppl were gonna sleep on them cause ITZY debuted a month before. Fortunately, everyone noticed their talent. 

BigBang - I dunno just listened to one of their songs. And, of course, I fell in love. Too late to stan them while they were active, but I’m expecting something in 2020... just saaying.

NCT - All of the subunits. Honestly there were so many of them, I spent time taking tests to tell them apart. The struggle to stan these boys. Instantly fell in with the Dreamies. And then I found out they weren’t a fixed unit... My heart shattered. It’s still breaking because 4 OF THEM ARE LEAVING. or left. I dunno. 

Tomorrow by Together - They were probably the most anticipated group of this year. I remember ppl hyping them up in October of 2018! Predebut stan right here. (I just remembered that I thought the preview of each member was coming out in age order and thinking that Beomgyu was the youngest. And I was just like WHERE IS HEUNINGKAI FROM?!?!)

ITZY - remember when everyone thought that itzy’s debut was rushed because info about them was leaked. yeah, i forgot too. anyways, again I was a predebut stan. 

(G)- idle - i always listened to their title tracks and I began stanning them during Queendom after their Fire cover im listening to 2ne1 2015 mama fire performance rn lol.... omg bom’s han cover just started playing. spotify is watching me guys.

Somi - Birthday was a bop. fight me. outfits sucked, gotta agree with that opinion I didn’t rlly know much about IOI but I started stanning because Jenchu were fangirling to it i mean jennie twerked for it!

Jimin Park - I’m out here still streaming STAY BEAUTIFUL. honestly she’s so loveable. her personality and her voice are everything. how can you not like her

My Top 5 Groups of the Year

1. STRAY KIDS - A lot of the reasons I luv them are the same as ATEEZ. That’s why ateez are close to being my number one, but honestly these 9 boys are everything to me. 9 or NONE FOREVER. They have been through so much this year and I hope they STAY strong for 2020. In their 2020 seasons greeting they announced a full album next year, so I’m ready to follow these boys on their journey no matter how many stay or leave. I’m a STAY for a reason. 

2. ATEEZ - PERSONALITY. I’m also a sucker for groups that shove their love for each other in your face. 8 makes 1 team, y’know? Hongjoong and Mingi are amazing rappers, Jongho, Wooyoung and San’s vocals tho, Yunho and Seonghwa’s deep voices are the death of me, and Yeosang dancing. They’re talented and luvable and that’s all I need for an ult group. also all their songs are bops

3. Mamamoo - Honestly would’ve tied with Twice but these I’m a sucker for them as ppl as well, and I need that to luv a group. they ain’t fake, they slap information in your face and they are POWERFUL WOMAN. (Not saying twice aren’t ofcourse) And these girls vocals are on POINT. Moonbyul is rapper material, but have you heard the girl song? What an angel. Their songs are all slaps, especially the most recent ones. 

4. TWICE - This was their year? yes or yes. Fancy soty. Feel Special was a great title track, don’t get me wrong, bUT HAVE YOU HEARD THE FULL ALBUM. Every song is my AMAZING. omg rainbow is playing

5. NCT DREAM - These boys stole my heart, I only stanned nct because of them. Honestly seeing the 00 line leave breaks my heart.

My Top 5 girl group and boy group songs

gg songs were honestly so hard to pick, they thrived and SO many good songs were made in 2019. But here is my list. 

1. Fancy - soty

2. Hip - this song was everything from the choreo to the song itself to the girls energy performing it

3. Psycho - came out like last week but it’s in everyone's top 10 of this year. Beautiful song that won’t get outta my head. getwellsoonwendy.

4.Violeta - this is another song that won’t get out of my head. honestly none of these songs will. ok so the final dance part after the drop of violeta pisses me off because the dance could is so powerful and that part comes and it’s such a disappointment but it’s the only part I can do so i shouldn't complain  but the song itself is very catchy. I don’t want these girls to disband even if the votes were rigged because they make a good group and sing bangers. i don't want them to leeeave.

5.Lion - the song is just so powerful. other songs they’ve made are good, but the chorus is usually a disappointment because the pre chorus is so good but EVERYTHING is great about Lion. Didn’t like it at first for some reason, i dunno why, but once you give it a few more listens you’ll fall in love. 

Now onto the boy groups. They made quite a few bangers this year as well.

1. Miroh - It’s my no.1 of the year. watchu expect?

2. Wave - and this is my no.2. Again, what else would I put here?

3. Run Away - what. a. bop. still can’t get out of my head. Crown was a disappointment to me after 1000 listens but not Run Away. A bonus is the Harry Potter references. With that I just was head over heels in love. Txt didn’t fail to disappoint with their comeback even if it was pushed back. 

4. Boom - This song made me fall in love with the talent that NCT DREAM holds despite being so young. Sang along for a few months. Actually, it’s still in my head. 

5. Make It Right - I was doing title tracks for all these but then I realised there has to be an exception because I just really like this song, especially the one featuring Lauv. Boy with luv wasn’t it for me but every other song on Persona is a straight up masterpiece (ok an exaggeration but u get what i mean)

Now onto the soloists (they’re all female, sry not sry)

1. Chica - I was debating whether to put Snapping or this but decided with Chica. Honestly the vocals, the song, the dance, the MESSAGE, is everything. I love it, it empowers woman, it makes ME feel good, and it’s what some people really need sometimes. So, thank you ChungHa. 

2. Gotta Go - another bop by our queen ChungHa, she really ruled this year. I didn’t stan her when it came out but that doesn’t mean I didn’t do the ‘deulshi’ part whenever I heard it. iconic.

3. Twit - Again another iconic bop from this year. (i thought this masterpiece came out last year, i dunno why but it just is so 2018 for some reason? I dunno) Hwasa’s solo debut really was everything. So was Moonbyul’s which unfortunately didn't make it on the list but I would say it’s in between 5th to 7th for me. 

4. Stay Beautiful - Such a beautiful song, it was a shame Jamie had to leave but she left JYP saying that they lost smth PRECIOUS and they would regret it and she conveyed all that in one song without hinting at it. So many quote worthy lyrics were in the song and it just bring up my mood and my standard for vocals. Don’t sleep on this girl, y’all. 

5. Birthday - the song brought out mixed reactions from everyone but i LOVED IT. It did get a bit old but it’s still something you’ll find me singing along to every now and then. 

ARTISTS THAT STOOD OUT TO ME THIS YEAR 

1. Bang Chan of Stray Kids. I love him. He’s such a great leader, he’s a loveable person, he’s all rounded and he fucks up sometimes but he acknowledges it and fixes it. He went through so much shit this year and he deserves so much more. I, along with many other STAYs are gonna make 2020 a better year for him and all of his group. Stay strong Chan! But besides his personality his stage presence, his rapping, his singing, his producing, his energy, his personality, it all made him someone who was always on my mind. 

2. Yeonjun of Tomorrow x Together. He’s also very well rounded and he really stands out to me from all the other 4th gens. Whenever I see a performance by TXT he always grabs my attention even when he’s not the main focus. I love his dancing, it’s very eye catching to me, along with his stage presence. He never loses his energy on stage and I expect a lot from him in 2020! His rapping and singing are amazing as well, especially for a rookie. Also when they first debuted he cried a lot, which was very heartwarming to me because idols showing emotion other than happy is something I appreciate, because it lets me remember they’re human too.

3. Seulgi of Red Velvet. She’s, again, very well rounded. I’m not really a Reveluv, but Wendy and Seulgi are vocalists who really stand out to me so those to kind of make me want to listen to Red Velvet’s songs. She’s an amazing vocalist, like words can’t express how much a love this woman's voice. Her stage presence is amazing as well, she’s just a really good performer imo.

4. Jihyo and Nayeon of TWICE. First of all I really like their personality and how powerful they are. Honestly a wink from them and I’m falling of my chair. Secondly, I don’t know if anyone's noticed but I really like powerful female vocals, and these two have extremely POWERFUL vocals. Have you heard them sing? Just... POWERFUL, that’s all I can really say to describe their voices. 

5. Mingi and Hongjoong of ATEEZ. They are rapper that are gonna blow away the whole industry with 3racha, I mean they already have. Did y’all see their performance in MAMA. The RAWEST vocals I heard that whole show. They were obviously not lip syncing, you could hear Mingi panting and he didn’t rap a whole line, and I LOVE that because it is RAW and we need more raw vocals or atleast breaths heard when the artists are dancing because it makes the performance more REAL. also stage presence is amazing from these two, they really know how to hype up a crowd. 

ROOKIE GROUPS I EXPECT A LOT FROM NEXT YEAR

sorry my expectations are high for them, but they have stood out tome so much and i couldn’t stand to see them flop. 

1. TOMORROW X TOGETHER - they’ve been on this list quite a lot, and I really appreciate their individual talents along with them as a group. I REALLY want to see them improve and grow more next year because they were really pushed this year, being BTS’s juniors. I’m sure they were really stressed but I want them to become TOMORROW BY TOGETHER not BTS’s juniors. Probably won’t happen in a year but hopefully in the next decade.

2. ITZY - another group really known for theing the juniors of TWICE this time. The title tracks they released so far have all been listen to it the first time, you don;t like it, but listen to it the 2nd time and it’s stuck in your head for the next 7 months. Honestly if they keep going like this, it would be like a ITZY thing, and I honestly wouldn’t mind. 

3. EVERGLOW - i think everyone just saw bon bon chocolat, gave it a listen, and loved it. but i also heard it was produced by someone who helped produce Crown by TXT and Spring Day by BTS, so there’s another reason ppl may have liked it so much. Adios wasn’t a disappointment at all.  Of course, I would also love it if Everglow kept up the “nanana” thing in each of their title tracks.

4. ATEEZ - I don’t think they’ll flop at all next year. I know they just had their 1st year anniversary, but I wouldn’t mind a full album... either way, Imma stick with them because they’ve only released that good shit so far and I’m honestly expecting a somewhat mediocre song at least once in their career next year. Not expecting it though. 

5. ONEUS - I haven’t’t talked about them yet but all of oneus’s title tracks are absolute gold. I am a mess for Valkyrie, Twilight AND Lit. They’re all just AMAZING songs. I mean, what did we expect from Mamamoo’s juniors but. They are REALLY good. Just go listen to all their title tracks rn. 

And finally, wishes for 2020

- Of course, Wendy to recover after her tragic incident at SBS. Again, I hope she recovers well

- Mina to come back from her hiatus, only if she’s ready to, of course

- BLACKPINK FULL ALBUM. ROSE SOLO. PLEASE.

- Of course, 4th gen to thrive along with 3rd gen and 2nd gen groups

- A full album from stray kids (which was confirmed) and again, maybe for ATEEZ? just maybe? 

- More attention for Mamamoo. They are underrated queens. 

- Less hate for Tomorrow By Together. People bash them just because they’re BTS’s juniors. they would be praised a less but definitely not doubted way more if they weren’t under Bighit. Yeah, they get luxuries other groups won’t but that doesn’t mean people should degrade them for it. 

And with that

I wish everyone a Happy New Year. May your next decade be filled with happiness and joy! omg fancy started playing

also i didn’t have time to properly edit this. then again i am a rambling blog, so what are you expecting?

#kpop #twice #mamamoo #txt #bts #kpop 2020 #ateez #everglow #itzy #oneus #jyp #kpop 4th gen #chung ha #somi #queen hwasa #jimin park #chica #snapping #gotta go #twit #stay beautiful #birthday #stray kids #got7 #bang chan #choi yeonjun #kang seulgi #im nayeon #park jihyo #song mingi