#ignoring the abuse they have also been through tho? that's. that's just not okay | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

chaifootsteps · 5 months

Note

College anon dropping in to say that the dubs aren't very good. Some, like the french one, sound like the text went through google translate (and the dubbing in general is terrible despite France having a good rep in the industry). The Italian version of Poison is low-key good tho

As for my reaction to Poison, imagine that gif of the happy yellow emoji looking traumatized/dead inside. I stared at the screen wondering what led me to watching this and how ANYONE would think this was a good scene. Vivziepop claiming that the leaks don't represent the full scene was right for once... It was so much worse. I could think of a more tasteful way to picture it in 5 seconds, it isn't that hard. She could have even kept most of the scene, just remove the graphic stuff to keep the suggestive dancing (a smart idea that should have remained subtle) and maybe keep the Val part à la Addict to show that, yeah, on top of "working" all night (because the graphic scenes made it obvious he stopped "enjoying" work early during the night), Val SA'd him and that shows the entirety of the hell he's going through. It explains why he breaks down and lashes out. Viv didn't need to keep most of the SA, the entire thing was implied.

Also episode 4 comes out of left field. Yes, it was foreshadowed since the beginning but why is Angel suddenly returning his calls? We SAW him ignore Val. He clearly HATES him. Since when is Husk calling him out and badgering him about being "fake"?? They've known each other for a WEEK. It's way too early for that. It's like we're missing 3-4 episodes of development in-between. Angel reconnecting with Val and showing hints that this is indeed a facade, Husk knowing a lot about everyone and giving a damn... This should be a mid-end of season arc for Angel. I'd personally make it end of season 1 so that he can show change during season 2, beginning as someone new, someone who slowly tries to show he cares and let down his bravado in small amounts, with clear hints of being a little scared of the reactions, until it naturally becomes his full-time persona. Maybe have Charlie notice at some point and subtly encourage him, DELIGHTED (in caps because that girl is extra) that Angel is getting better but having to keep her excitement in in fear of scaring him off (because Charlie should have SOME sort of emotional intelligence ffs).

Loser, Baby feels out of place. This is NOT the appropriate reaction to Angel's words. Did they rewrite the dialogue but not the song?? Here's how it sounds:

Angel: I feel like I've gotta be Val's perfect whore all the time so I'm trying to break myself enough he will be alone—

Husk: Well, it's okay to be a loser, baby! Look at me, I'm a failure too. You ain't special and it's okay!

....So Angel is a loser/failure/broken but Val is still into him??? Did they realize that this should send him the wrong message?! That Val will "love" him no matter what and that Angel cannot be free, that he's been making himself miserable for NOTHING?? First of all, Husk's greediness and addictions are NOTHING like Angel's situation. He signed with his real name. That alone implies that Val snatched him early on as he arrived. On top of that, he's being abused every way possible on the regular, for no fault of his own, and is self-destructing. He cannot kill himself and Val won't let him be killed. This is NOTHING like Husk losing a game for more power and being forced to be a bartender.

Here's how it should have gone for the song to work:

Angel: So?! The real me is a good for nothing loser who died in a ditch from some shitty coke! THIS is the famous, hotter than Hell pornstar that everyone wanna fuck! And I've— I've gotta be the part. 'Cause if I'm not... If I ain't then who am I?

Angel's fear should have been about being seen as who he was, as some loser that nobody loved. Let him feel like he beat his father, that now he's someone so suck it dad! You were wrong! Let Angel behave as if his life was a porn movie because that's all he knows now and what he thinks he should be like. Instead of trying to ruin himself so that Val discards him, have him try to be perfect... Because that'll stop the abuse, right? Val is happy when he acts like that. The perverts worship him. No one cares about Anthony.

That would make Loser, Baby work. It would achieve its goal of saying "it's okay to suck, we all do! Look at me, I'm a loser but my life isn't over!" and get Angel to accept that he's enough as he is. If you add in a few episodes beforehand to set it up, it could have worked better instead of being insensitive.

Personally I would have entirely changed the Angel/Val dynamic. Val can still be a whiny bitch but not in a drama queen way as is implied. He gets like that whenever he loses control of his favorite. Have one of the Vees groan and say something about Angel having done something as if it happened often. Make them used to Val throwing a fit because he didn't get what he wanted out of Angel or because he's having a jealousy fit. It already makes Val more controlling. It'll make the messages scene hit harder as, yeah, we can see why Angel left, the dude is unstable and obsessed. I'd be a little more fucked-up and have Angel kinda love him. Ofc in the Stockholm Syndrome way, he's been abused so much he's too attached to leave. That shift in dynamic would explain why he eventually goes back despite everything. Like in the show, he feels ignored in favor of the new resident and the way he's dismissed and talked about makes him feel like shit. He checks his phone again and ends up listening to Val's new voice messages... And this time, they're sickeningly sweet in a row. He's sorry, he's begging for him to come back. He loves him. And that's enough for Angel to go out or answer him. Put a few episodes in-between where Angel seems... Off? How weird, he's jumpy, more on his phone. He's out for parts of the episodes or clearly focused on something else. Then we get episode 4, where everyone culminates to show how bad the situation is for him. I'd personally not have Val hit him. He's smart enough to not leave bruises on his top whore. However, he's manipulative and threatening. There's no doubt that he COULD hit Angel whenever, especially with the way he cowers. Angel tries to diffuse the situation, so well that it's heartbreaking, and he gets bold. That line when he doesn't reply "Yes Val" is meant with silence as we wait for Val's reaction, waiting for him to blow up. A beat. He doesn't. He's not calm but he's not as angry. He's not going to hit him. He thanks Angel, touching him while the other flinches, a hint that he handles Angel roughly in this kind of situation, and just as Angel looks relieved, he announces that he'll have to work all night, distressing Angel again.

Ofc that would require extensive research and talk to specialists to do it well. Viv's audience can be stupid so it's more of a struggle to make it clear that none of this is Angel's fault and to not romantize this shit but it's more interesting than Val being so obviously abusive. IMHO he almost transformed into someone else in that episode and it could work but we didn't see enough of him to go "oh that's the old abuser trick! he's not as nice as he is with others when he's with his victim!". Idk how to put it sensibly but the impression he gave me was "whiny manchild who sadly was given enough power by Daddy Vox to abuse someone" instead of the intended "terrifying Overlord who is unstable and abusing his power to abuse whichever worker he fancies at the moment". I dunno Chai I just think it would work better if he were more manipulative and welding his power in other ways than by force. Like Angel isn't scared by his strength but by his influence. Also I would low-key find a way to make it so that Angel, mistakenly, thinks he can get away with some things to explain how he'd leave for the Hotel. Like having him not be a perfect victim. While he tries to cater to Val and keep him happy out of fear (and/or care because abuse fucks you up), he sometimes provokes him or tries to do his own thing. It'd show he's his own person and stuff. Sadly that would be lost on Viv's stans and it would absolutely spark some victim-shaming stuff or worse. But I think if she's gonna try to portray something like this, she could do with some nuance and not so... Cliché? Of course, it happens like this to too many people but it feels like she's applying a trope with no thought into it. The most cookie-cutter depiction she could do for quick satisfaction or to tick that case. A bit like how Stolitz is a mix of multiple tropes and is a terribly done version of that trope where a noble falls in love with someone whose class is lower with a sprinkle of badly done transactional relationship that sparks feelings. Thinking of HB, HH has better representation of abuse but not by much. I feel like if Stella was a man, she'd have written it this way? It felt like fetish fuel hiding underneath the surface whereas Stella was lazy writing.

I dunno man, I wanted to rant about Charlie and her design but episode 4 hit me like a wall of bricks

Thank you for all of this, College Anon. This was a great read, and you're right, the Italian version of Poison goes so much harder than the English.

Also Italian Val's voice is...yeah, 10/10 stars on that one. Mama mia.

youtube

#Anonymous #viv stuff #actual blog post #hazbin hotel critical #video reply

43 notes · View notes

purrplegyuu · 7 months

Text

Cold | Choi Beomgyu

Index

Chapter three

Warnings: unhappiness, slightly angst, soft beomgyu, abusive mother, swearing. omg the softest chapter eveeer

Word count: 1.4k

Taglist: @arianap23e, @haatohwa

I don't know why is it soooo soft, I don't like it ughhh. Like this is a dark story. Anyways, the following chapters are gonna be waaaay darker (i mean i hope). I kinda like soft Beommie tho...

Let me know if you find any kind of mistake, i'm not a native speaker and this helps me so so so much ^_^

Also let me know if you want to be added to the tag list, if you want to suggest an event to happen on next chapters or if you have any question about any detail. Luv yaa (●'◡'●)

I’m not happy. I know that. I know I will never go to school with a bright smile on my face like Jiwoo, because unlike her, I don’t have anything that makes me enjoy sitting on an uncomfortable chair for hours, looking at the professors as if I am paying attention, and talk kindly to my classmates as if I don’t hate them so much.

I even started to believe happiness is a vile lie American series have shown to us.

However, lately, these bad feelings have been increasing. And dad knows that.

That’s why he came home early on a saturday night and announced that we were going on vacation to that pretty house on a lake that his mother left him as an inheritance.

“You okay guys?” He asks while driving, looking at me through the mirror. I smile slightly at him, nodding. “Gyu, I heard you got really good grades again. Bet your mother is really really proud” Beomgyu looks at him back, quiet, and totally ignores him.

The awkward aura all over the car now, as dad looks at Beomgyu’s mother, scared of making his relationship even worse. He has tried thousands of ways to get along with Beomgyu, but the boy sitting by my side never really cared.

Once we arrive, dad gets out of his car, stretching his back. I look at Beomgyu. He really hates my father. At least that’s what it looks like—he gets even darker when our parents are close to him, doesn’t even smirk at any kind of jokes and doesn’t say a single word until they are far away again.

But today, he looks even more dark than usual, which makes me feel a bit scared.

I get out of the car when he does. I see his mother running towards my dad in order to enter the house with him.

We both stand in front of the house quietly, looking at the way our parents play like kids with their luggage as they take it in the house. They really look like a young couple. However, I find it a bit weird, but I guess it is just because I never liked her.

I look around. There are so many memories from my childhood—the garden full of flowers I planted when I was five, the rustic oven I used to make pizza in when I was eight, the lake where I learned how to swim when I was nine. But everything looks just too old and dirty—it’s been seven years since the last time we came here, it’s been seven years since the last time I enjoyed being in such a place… it’s been seven years since I last saw her.

I walk through the trees until I have reached a certain place. A small dock made of old wood, mouldy and poorly stable. Hundreds of drawings all over one of the wood tiles—’Jeongseo’ on top of everything, followed by ‘Namhyuk’ and ‘Dami’.

I really miss those times.

By 6 p. m., dad calls me to the big dock in front of our house.

“Gaeum, honey, could you please go get the meat?” Beomgyu’s mom smiles at him, and makes a disgusted face when she turns around. Dad’s on the white boat his father used to drive right before dying three years ago. Everything I can think about when I see it, is him swearing he will never use it again because it was his dad’s, not his.

“We’re taking Luna on an expedition” he says. I can see the happiness on his face. Luna is the name grandpa gave his boat. “Remember when we used to go to the other side of the lake?” I nod. “Well, we are going to go there to take the dinner tonight” a big smile on his face makes me force myself to smile although I’m not happy or excited.

“I will go get a sweater”

When I get in the house, I don’t see Gaeum in the kitchen, which I found a bit weird, but don’t really pay attention to it. I go to my room, take a pink sweater and try it on in front of the mirror. I’m wearing a long-sleeved dark shirt which is supposed to cover me up enough to make me feel warm, however, the short jean skirt makes it hard for me to get warm. Even with a big coat, and in the house, I’m trembling.

However, I get out of my room, holding a white blanket, and stop walking when I hear some noises in Beomgyu’s room. The door is closed, so I cannot see anything, but I don’t also see any light under the door, even though it’s 6:30 p. m., and it’s very dark already.

“Don’t be fucking dumb” Gaeum’s voice sounding so different—meaner, unlike her usual fake sweet voice tone. “Could you please think a bit? Ha, you’re almost an adult, why would I have to ask you to not be so dumb?” The door of my room closes strongly due to the air running through my open window, which makes me jump, touching my chest. No more sounds in the room makes me feel scared someone can catch me, so I walk back to the door.

Gaeum gets out of Beomgyu’s room, and I look at her, trying to look as natural as possible, holding tightly my blanket, faking a blank face to her like I didn’t hear anything.

“What?” I ask when she keeps looking at me. I even impress myself with my almost perfect acting.

“Are you ready? I’m asking Beomgyu if he is also ready” I look in his room. He’s not visible from outside, so I just nod to her, going down once again.

Some minutes after that, Gaeum gets on the boat, giving dad the things he asked for and his coat. Beomgyu walks behind her, blank face as always, and doesn’t look at dad, just gets in the boat and sits by my side.

Dad knows perfectly how to drive the boat, so he does it while we all try to warm ourselves with our coats.

The place we and Beomgyu are sitting is lower than the place our parents are at, so they can’t see us unless they go down.

That’s why he puts his hand on my thigh, caressing it as we’re alone over there. I look at him, looking at the lake deeply. His soft hair moving with the air, his face even prettier than ever, flawless skin, and some red marks on his cheeks like he has just cried.

“You don’t seem that happy” he says, still looking at the lake.

“I never look happy” I say, jokingly. Spending so much time with Jiwoo has started to affect me. But he doesn’t laugh. The silence makes me want to be sincere with him. Guess he has this effect on me. “I don’t really like here” He turns around to look at me, almost surprised at my words. It’s a pretty and almost paradisiacal place. Why wouldn’t I like it? “Everything I can think about when I’m here is her… the last time I saw mom”

We stay silent for a few minutes, weirdly enjoying each other’s company.

Then, he talks once again. “I know you listened” his husky voice should make me feel scared, however, his hands touching me so softly, his head against mine, his arm around me, his body warming me up… I can’t be scared even if he says he will kill me after that. And I wonder if that kind of scenes are the reason I love him so much even when he treats me so wrong most of the time. Maybe I don’t love him, maybe I just love the way he treats me so wrong, but sometimes, he acts like he loves me back.

I don’t try to deny it. He knows me well. The voice tone he used isn’t even doubtful. He knows I listened.

“Don’t want to know why was she so mad?” Weirdly, everytime he doesn’t use pet names, it’s just because he’s treating me well.

I look at him quietly. I find it a bit acted the way he fakes peace, like it doesn’t really bother him. His eyes a bit red, like his nose and cheeks.

“She found out I’m fucking someone” He flashes a bit more than usual. “, and scolded me for not using condom” His eyes shiny, and can feel like he’s being forced or something like that. However, I don’t say anything.

I never say anything.

#beomgyu smut #txt smut #txt choi line smut #soobin smut #tw: noncon #toxic beomgyu #tw: dubcon #kpop #kpop smut #fanfic #txt x reader #txt imagines #Beomgyu stepbrother #beomgyu overstimulation #beomgyu hard dom #beomgyu mean dom #Cold | Beomgyu #purrplegyuu

42 notes · View notes

so-long-soldier-writes · 4 months

Note

Lmao ignore me if u want but I have two questions

How would Kai be as a werewolf alpha???

And if he was a demigod like percy Jackson would would he be the son of???????

Here is a picture of our pookie as an apology

First of all, that gif is making me absolutely FERAL. Second, I want to bite him. [you have a lovely clavicle; i'm a neck person; that's just silly, you can't stop being a neck person] Third, you never bother me, I promise! I love answering these & talking to you through them (& comments)! I've just been so out of sorts lately with my home life and work life - both chaotic - but desperately have been needing to get back in the swing of things in terms of writing / posting / answering!

Now, to tackle these questions that have both brought hearts to my eyes... (and I was so excited, I made dividers to split them up)

tw: some nsfw (can I even write that on tumblr anymore?) on the wolf portion, but no warnings on the demigod part

#1 - werewolf alpha kai

FUCK

do notttt get me started on wolf kai; how the fuuuck have I not wolf-i-fied him yet 😭😭

okay. I had it down so bad for jacob in the great edward vs jacob debacle of the 2000s. I was OBSESSED with wolves / werewolves in general, too

funnily enough, I don't give a damn for the wolves in tvd. Tyler's fine. Hayley is fine in TO (not tvd tho lmao). The rest in TVD / TO are whatever; the ones in Legacies are HORRID

BUT wolf!kai would be sooo hot; alpha wolf kai especially, oh heaven help me

this man is already dominant & controlling, and with his SO, protective, but add that wolf gene and he's tenfold

he'd be an absolute menace... to damon, to tyler, to mystic falls in general, & maybe even to klaus... & to my ovaries...

starting off, let's just picture him as a wolf

i was actually thinking about this the other day... what if the actual reason that he was "an abomination" was if he had the wolf gene on top of the siphon gene somehow. like, joshua wasn't his real father, or his mother wasn't his real mother, idk, but joshua HATES him for it (kinda like klaus)

kai's childhood is the same - violent, abusive, isolated - and he ends up in the '94 PW the same way, but while kai shows damon and bonnie his ability to siphon, he never reveals the wolf part

when he gets back to the real world, he's going to have to transition again, bc he's no longer on a repeating loop of the same day, so he carefully plans for this

he makes sporadic disappearances throughout the month, so that no one ever catches on to him being absent on full moons

the only reason he's caught, is because [reader] stumbles upon him entering / coming off his transition, but lucky she's been crushing on him or is a wolf herself

if i were to write this out, this is as much plot as i've developed. i would add a bit in there, too, where she mentions klaus, maybe she has a connection to him, and they both can commiserate on their similar childhoods together

but that's all i've got so far; idk if i'm doing anything with it

regardless, wolfy kai!

he'd be so much more temperamental & combative

if damon were to know, he'd be like, oh ffs not another one

but this gene also makes him stronger than if he were just a witch

imagine Tyler's fondness for fight picking + Kai's own flirty / cocky attitude + werewolf lore behavior + alpha behavior, and you've got a dangerous mix wrapped up in one very attractive man, i mean, just look at the gif

whether you're a wolf or not, he puts himself in charge of protecting you, even if you're quite capable of defending yourself

he has to have an arm or a leg wrapped around you, too, and is always on alert, even in his sleep

is also a very cuddly sleeper, is a big spoon, and will throw a fit if he can't sleep with you for some reason

when he's alone with you, he's his usual goofy self, and maybe takes a second to get himself under control in serious situations

but also as an alpha, still knows when to snap into his dominant demeanor when the situation calls for it

now... i've thought up several different scenarios where we could have wolfy kai... and since i'm me, i also have an nsfw section

...so here's that one first

breeding kink would be off the charts

especially as an alpha, where it's so innate, and if he has a pack, a desire to keep it going & keep it strong

and like tyler mentioned, "being horny all the time"

huge biting kink, but only if you're a wolf, too

play bites as a way to show affection, but bites during sex, too

bites in places visible to others; always marking you as his

again, dominant, and would be one to pin you down or keep a hand on your throat as a means of control

would be so into praising you, during & after, telling you how well you did & how proud he is (& how good of a mom you're gonna be jfdsnls)

on the flip side, i don't think he'd be much into exhibitionism / voyeurism because he'd want you all for himself & would not want anyone to see you in one of your most vulnerable states

however, if you were in a pack and someone was hitting on you & not taking any hints that you're taken, he'd probably engage it in to some degree just to teach that someone a lesson that you're his

wolf!reader x wolf!kai

when you're nesting, he's already getting excited. tries to stick his nose in your business, though, and several times, you've bitten his nose to get him out of your space, but he just gets more excited

when ~the time~ finally comes, he tries to control himself, but sometimes gets lost in the pleasure

you have to safeword somewhat often, which he always respects

and his aftercare is always perfect, regardless if you used the word or not

outside of the sexual realm, you are always together

it takes some time to sink into his stubborn head, but you protect him as much as he protects you, and he's very grateful for it

the two of you are your own little pack

and tyler is very jealous of it

eyes roll all across the room when you enter, because the MF gang is pre-preparing for the sass and stubbornness they're about to face; you compliment him well, much to their dismay

but on the bright side, he kills much less, and only threatens or kills if someone threatens himself or you

on a side note, i can see tyler trying to recreate your bond with liv, and her not wanting any part of that wolfishness

she will date him but she won't engage with that, especially considering tyler's wolf-associated anger issues, and kai being her brother who she wants nothing to do with

...but, she has to hand it to you for getting him under control & to her absolute disbelief that it could happen, loving him the way you do (jo, too, is practically astonished, however grateful - he is her twin, after all)

non-wolf!reader x wolf!kai

now, if you're a vamp, he has to be very careful not to bite

tricky during sex sometimes; difficult when you insist on helping him transition

it's much of a caroline x tyler thing; you refuse to leave him but he's terrified of hurting you

whether you're human, or a witch, or a vampire, he could hurt you, and the thought terrifies him

is insistent on a buddyship with damon or stefan, so that they can call klaus if an emergency ever occurs

both are reluctant, but are friends with you, and if something ever does happen, they'd hate for you to suffer, so they do

klaus gets involved & he and kai bond more than anyone would've anticipated

maybe kai reminds klaus a bit of himself - his childhood, his difficult relationships with his siblings, his fancy for one person in particular; maybe kai also reminds him a bit of kol, his own brother with a head full of sarcasm & jokes and a penchant for violence

although, if this is alpha!kai, klaus would notice that immediately and would have an, oh shit, this kid's powerful, moment that would knock him off his feet

kai might not even realize the strength he has, or he does, but doesn't let on to anyone that he knows how powerful he is

regardless of which, klaus knows he has to stay on his good side, and maybe he tells stefan to do the same for his own good

as long as no one becomes a threat, kai keeps his cool, but that alpha side comes out when he's protecting you or himself

and that, for whoever poor soul, is fucking terrifying

#2 - demigod parent

alright... first thought was Hades bc he's so dark & eerie

then I was like nah, way too much of a basic answer, just to tag anyone with a closed off personality and dark clothes as a Hades' kid (don't get me wrong, I love Nico, but in comparison, he & Kai are nothing alike)

Kai just doesn't have the personality of Hades' kids; he is way more than the dark witch he's made out to be by writers

he's extremely talkative, rather lively, & outgoing

ofc he's got that unpredictability & hair-raising ability to slink around like a cat without being noticed (i.e. stalking damon and bonnie for 4 months without their knowledge), but he doesn't scream child of Hades when we learn how talkative and touchy he actually is

so then, bc I haven't read PJO in 6 years, I did some research

Ares became a possibility... he's got some anger issues & is good with a knife

however, he doesn't seem like a child of war

most of his childhood, we can assume, he spent trying to avoid his father's anger & disapproval

sibling murder was the last resort for a depressed, distanced kid who was taught life didn't matter as long as the coven survived

and as vengeful and argumentative as he is, I wouldn't put him in a box with Clarisse, who picked fights 24/7

Hecate came to mind, but as a siphon, I think maybe not

if it was Hecate, he'd probably be outcasted by his half-siblings (and then I'd have to fight them, and it'd be a whole thing), so I took Hecate out of the choices

then, after more research, the obvious answer became Hermes

Kai is such a little shit

he's funny, sarcastic, and just seems like the guy to love a good prank

he's very smart, and can be manipulative if he wants / needs to be

his half siblings would more or less equal him in intelligence and personality, so he wouldn't feel the need to slice & dice them

(and also, doesn't Hermes have the most kids? bc his parents had a fuck ton of kids, so Kai would totally be used to having SO MANY siblings)

(plus unclaimed kids stayed in Hermes' cabin & Kai knows what it's like to be a family reject; they can commiserate)

not to mention, Luke was a child of Hermes, and I vaguely remember he went a little dark & crazy, too

granted, that could happen to anyone, but I can see Kai & Luke being like, hey, half-sibling, ~you're just as sane as I am~

now...

I also considered Aphrodite, and stay with me, bc he's so fucking gorgeous (I mean, again, look at that gif), and it would be cool to have a child of love with his emotions so turned off

imagine his father was so abusive (which he was), that Kai was so shut off when he got to camp

everyone shared rumors about his parentage; whispers of Hades circulated the most

but then it's Aphrodite who claims him, and everyone, Kai included, is shocked

for awhile, his siblings kinda outcast him & he's feeling it; he has definitely considered running away

but someone gives him a chance, maybe someone who feels equally unlike their godly parent approaches him & gains his trust, or maybe it's someone who doesn't like to see others treated the way his half-siblings are treating him

either way, he slowly opens up to them & begins to trust them; they return these feelings to him

with time, he gets fiercely protective & caring towards that person; he shows love in his own ways

eventually, his siblings start to see it & open up to him

once Kai realizes they're being genuine, he shows them similar attention, care, & protection

he might not be the typical child of Aphrodite, but his dulled emotions start to come through once he's given a chance & a safe space

... But as much as I love this headcanon, I say he's 100% child of Hermes. He just fits the bill completely, and I freaking love it.

#asks #i'm still trying to answer your body swap question but skipped it to answer this first because !!!!#obsessed #and now i have a trillion new fic ideas to write #also i could go on forever about the wolf portion #and the demigod portion too especially the aphrodite thing #my hands were struggling to keep up with my brain spitting out words 😅#kai parker #and what's that gif from #i bite him #*chomp*#(it's a love chomp)

18 notes · View notes

skye-the-dragon · 2 months

Text

My Tav!!! :D

I thought I’d share how they look in-game, since drawing them can only do so much lol

If you want some additional info (+more how i see them) it’s under the cut lol

So, my Tav.

Their name is Zion, because they’re essentially a self insert and I’m very uncreative

They’re a sorcerer

They’re nonbinary (use they/them), aromantic (but still willing to be in a relationship when they find a person they feel comfy with), and asexual (sex positive tho)

(Let me explore my sexuality through fiction okay-)

They’re around 180 years old during the game’s events, which I’ve decided is more or less 25-30 human years

They’re a human-drow-dragonborn, but the human traces are very slight because their parents were pure dragonborn and a half-drow, but down a few generations of drow/drow relationships. Their most human parts are the slightly creamy colors to their cheeks and ears, as well as a small amount of almost-white hairs, mostly over their arms and legs

From more draconic features, they mainly have slitted pupils, like a cat, because it’s fun, and their teeth are sharper than average. Plus they have scales, other than on the face, on their biceps, and all over their chest area (no nipples lol). Plus sharper-than-usual nails :)

I’ve also decided they do have a draconic tail, despite that not being an option in in-game customization, because it’s my imagining of the world and I get to do what I want, I am the DM now >:3

On that note, big sucker for wings here, so… you know. They have “retractable” (part-magic) draconic wings. But, to make it less op, I’ve made it hurt like hell whenever they summon them, cause it’s essentially like speed-growing an additional body part with bone in it, then shedding it like a skinwalker on supernatural, so they don’t use that nearly at all, unless under really strong emotions, or under extreme circumstances. But, to make it more fun, their feet also turn draconic when they do that

(Ik people are probably gonna come at me for that one, but eh, I don’t really care. It’s my version of the world, after all. Besides, it doesn’t come up often so you can technically just ignore that)

They have the criminal background, and I don’t quite have their backstory fleshed out just yet, but I know they became a thief to survive after their family was killed due to debt (drow are brutal), then it became a sort of revenge thing, to steal from rich people and such

They got found out at one point, at around 150 years of age, and were hunted down, but escaped the town before they got caught and/or killed, which is pretty much like a banishment if you think about it lol

Since then they’ve just been living sorta on the run, stealing or foraging and hunting to survive, at first in the Underdark, then, later, on the surface

Twas on one of their heists for food the nautiloid got them

Now for some fun facts and other little things!

They actually dislike the sun, it makes their eyes hurt from how bright it is. Were very disappointed because everyone who’s seen it and been in the Underdark praised its beauty and shit, but when they saw it for the first time they were just like “I cannot see”

They still appreciate sunsets and sunrises though

They speak Common, Undercommon, Drowish, and know how to say a few basic phrases in Draconic/Glav (they can read the alphabet as well, just not out loud)

They’re very morally grey. Like, would sell your soul to a devil for a single corn chip with no remorse but would also immediately stand up to your abuser kind of morally grey

They can eat raw and rotten food without much consequence, because their draconic ancestry makes their stomach acid more… well, acidic, so it just melts all the bad stuff away. They don’t like rotten food tho, it tastes bad. Raw meat on the other hand…

Once they get attached to someone they will do anything for them

Despite Astarion’s lines being pretty much copy-pasted from a script, they find them endearing (until they learn about his past, then they want to hold him every time he falls back into that habit)

They have unreasonable amounts of charisma when they want (17), despite the fact they’re a total dumbass other times

Speaking of stats, STR is at 8, so they’re very lean

Their favorite animals are snakes, they just love the noodly babies

They make dirty jokes every chance they get (to the delight of Astarion and demise of literally everyone else)

They hate kids. Like, really. They let that tiefling child who stole the locket from that one guy get slapped lmao

Aside from the visible piercings, they have a belly button one as well

That’s it I think for now. If you’ve read this far, I hope you enjoyed me dumping all the info on you lmao <3

#bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #baldur’s gate 3 #baldurs gate iii #baldur's gate iii #baldurs gate tav #bg3 tav #tav #my tav

8 notes · View notes

hard-deck-confessions · 9 months

Text

I See You - Chapter 1

Pairing: Hangman x Phoenix

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: enemies to lovers (not yet tho), slow burn, slight swearing, for sure some military inaccuracies, third person POV

Summary: Phoenix hates Hangman's guts. But she cares about her friends more, and Hangman is making her best friend miserable. About a month ago, Hangman started picking on Bob again. No one knows why he started his jeering up again, but Phoenix is willing to pay anything to make it stop. But what happens when that price is a date? And what happens when it turns out that Jake Seresin actually isn't the worst company?

A/N: I had the idea for this fic after I saw a fanfic quote prompt somewhere: "I brought you a juice." (I can't find the user it was from, but if you do please let me know so I can credit them!) From there I wrote a cute little Hangman x reader incorrect Top Gun quote post, but I realized it was such a Hangman x Phoenix interaction so Jabber and I collaborated over some ideas and this baby was born!

This story is written fully in 3rd person, so omnipotent narrator who reads the other characters minds occasionally, but it takes place mostly from Phoenix’s POV.

Also I may have completely made up correction sensors, but they’re based off whatever targeting system that malfunctions during the “mission” in the movie. They never get mentioned again, please leave them alone. They are sensitive and valid.

Chapter Song(s): Mean, NO, CHOKE

****

"That’s a kill!" Bob’s excited voice came crackling through the radio in the Daggers’ break room.

The room erupted with cheers. No one had been able to down Hangman in this week’s exercises on targeting without the correction sensors so far, but Bob’s quick thinking and steady hand had finally done it. Hangman’s gloating would be replaced by cheers of Bob’s name that day in the lockers. A welcome reprieve.

Back in the air, Phoenix was pumping her fists in the air and flipping off an unknowing Hangman. "Suck it, Bagman! We got your butt good!" the aviator called through the radio. "That’s how we do it over here with the smoothest duo in the Daggers! Great job, Bob! MVP of the exercise for sure.”

The shy backseater blushed lightly beneath his oxygen mask. He still got flustered over the smallest compliments, no matter how many times his supportive squad mates clapped him on the back or clasped his shoulders singing his praises. He stumbled over his words as he squinted against the sun in his eyes, making getting the words out even harder, "I, uh, you—you basically lined up the shot for me, Phoenix, I just pressed the button."

"Nah, that was all you, Bob. Don’t sell yourself short." Phoenix insisted proudly.

"No, please do sell yourself short, Baby," Hangman interjected with a laugh, the cockiness and resentment were practically dripping from his voice, even through the radio.

"Please go screw yourself, Bagman," Phoenix spat back. "Ignore him, Bob, you did amazing."

"It’s okay, Phoenix; he’s just joking." Bob said, always trying to keep the peace, especially between Phoenix and Hangman. Bob was getting pretty good at standing up for himself, but the two of them always seemed to be at each other’s throats and Bob found that he was usually, unintentionally, the reason.

"I wasn’t, actually," Hangman quipped again.

Phoenix’s blood was about to boil; if it wasn’t likely to get both her and Bob a court martial, she’d dive on the cocky blond's plane just to give him a good scare. Instead, she settled for some "playful" verbal abuse.

"Bagman, everything everyone says behind your back is true."

"Was that meant to hurt my feelings, Phoenix?"

"I swear the only reason they let you fly solo is because your WSO would purposely sabotage you both just to get some damn peace."

"Oh, really? That the best you got?" Hangman taunted.

The breezy jovial feeling that had filled the air of the jet just moments before had gone stale, and instead a thick layer of smog-like anger had fallen over the aircraft cockpit. The temperature within had surely gone up by at least a few degrees with all the red hot words flying from Phoenix's mouth into her mic.

Bob's cheeks glowed to a flaming red as he listened to the two pilots bickering, entire body tense, helpless to remove himself from the mid-air argument, just waiting for the right moment to interject. He’d been in this situation many times before—he knew the drill. But that didn't make him any less uncomfortable. "Okay, c’mon, guys—" he began timidly, yet a level of assertion still came through in his voice.

"Great work, aviators!" Mav’s voice came like a shock over the radio, squashing the argument before it could manage to turn physical. No student had died on Mav's watch so far, and he wasn't looking to change that any time soon. Especially because 'purposeful collision due to mid-flight training disagreement' would not go over well on an accident report. "Let’s get these birds back on the ground. It’s quitin' time!"

Steam filled the empty locker room. Phoenix breathed deeply as she stepped out of the shower. She always felt like she had gained a new life after her shower at the end of each day; the amount of sweat produced under those flight suits was ungodly. She also liked to imagine that the boiling water was washing away all the boys’ BS that she had gone through that day. She loved, almost, all of them—though she’d never tell them that—but being the only girl on a team of men, Navy men, was rough. She was sure at least two of them truly were raised in a barn, and she knew Bob and Rooster were the only ones who even knew what the word "filter" meant.

She thought on her boys fondly, unable to hold back her smile, as she toweled off her hair behind the emotional privacy of the her locker door. She'd never dare show this side to them. This was still the military, after all, and she was still a woman. No matter how many times she proved herself tougher than the men around her, her and soft emotions were not allowed to coexist without ridicule. Wiping the condensation off of the mirror, she looked at her own face in the tinny glass, it had been hardened over her time in the Navy, and it reminded her of the look of rage on Hangman’s as they clambered back into the hanger. She laughed lightly. That was without a doubt the best thing she’d seen in weeks. She wished she could’ve had it photographed so she could look at it when she was having a bad day.

She didn’t truly hate the cocky pilot, but she had been nearing the line between it and mere distaste with his recent antics. After their first mission together, it had seemed like all grudges between any of the Daggers had been squashed; Hangman and Bob had been fully civil up until a couple weeks ago when Hangman decided to make the younger pilot his verbal target practice. Everyone had noticed the shift, but no one could tell exactly what triggered it. Bob had finally started to stand up for himself in the past couple days, which Phoenix was thankful for because any time anyone else said anything to Hangman, the treatment just got worse. It needed to end, and soon. Phoenix was ready to string Hangman up, but she knew acting out would only risk getting both her and Bob disciplined. She didn’t know what she was going to do. But she was sure as hell going to do something.

She finished getting ready to head home and slung her backpack over her shoulder. She tossed her hair into a loose bun as she walked out of the lockers, preparing to face the scorching heat already constantly present even this early into the California summer. Fanboy intercepted her in the hall outside the locker rooms. His face immediately told her that whatever he was about to say wasn’t another corny joke about his favorite tv series.

"There’s something you should know," he said.

"BAGMAN!"

Lt. Jake "Hangman" Seresin might not have finished at the very top of his classes, but he was smart enough to know that that yell could only mean one thing: he was about to get the chew out of a lifetime from one Lt. Natasha "Phoenix" Trace. He pulled his signature toothpick out of his mouth before turning on his heel to see the livid brunette storming down the hall, fire ablaze in her eyes.

If anyone else had been in the vicinity, they would've sworn they felt the temperature shift.

"What the hell, Hangman?" Phoenix barked, shoving a hand roughly into his chest, and sending the unprepared man stumbling back a couple steps with an unsophisticated mix between a "WOAH!" and "HEY!"

"What do you mean ‘what the hell'?" Hangman shot back, gathering himself and stepping forward, squaring his broad shoulders towards her. "You can't just attack a man without telling him what he did to provoke it."

Phoenix's face was now inches from his. Hangman could feel the rage on the heat of her breath.

"Watch me," she said, her voice dripping with venom. "Don't even start that crap with me. You know full well what you did."

"Humor me." Hangman said with the same tone he would have used in a casual conversation with a friend, which this situation very much was not.

There was finger in his face. He pretended there wasn't, looking past it directly into Phoenix's face.

"I am so fed up with your immature little grudge against, Bob."

"I didn't know I ever had one."

Hangman's tone was aloof, and it drove Phoenix crazy. How could he be such a prick? All she wanted to do was punch him in the jaw. She didn’t know why she always felt like she was about to explode with Hangman, no one else made it so difficult for her to keep her emotions in check, but she held it together—this time. She wasn't going to make herself any promises for the future.

"You two were supposed to be cool after the mission, I thought you had agreed to lay off him! I don't know who you think you are, but Bob is just as, if not more, qualified as any of us to be here. And you know it! But your fragile little ego just can't take that he's smarter than you, can it?" She practically spat the last words, ensuring they hit Hangman square in the face.

Phoenix saw his eyes soften for just a second and knew that she'd hit a nerve, but his expression didn’t change. He just continued to look at her with that same stupid, smug expression he always wore.

"And I have laid off him. He's not my concern any longer." He shrugged, popped the toothpick he'd been holding back into his mouth, and started to turn away. Phoenix forcefully grabbed his arm.

Her grip was stronger than Hangman assumed it would be.

"Really? 'Cause that's not what it looked like to Fanboy when he saw you corner him in the lockers after that last flying exercise. He said you looked ready to throttle Bob before he stepped in. That's low, even for you. We got you fair and square in that exercise. If you don't want to lose, try not making stupid mistakes. And one more thing," Phoenix said, leaning into Hangman's face, fists clenched so tightly at her sides they were pure red. "If you ever try taking your sore loss out on Bob again, we will be having a very different conversation that will not be much of a conversation at all."

"Is that a threat, Trace?" Hangman said coolly, a smirk on his face.

"It's a promise," Phoenix snapped, pushing past him forcefully, her shoulder smacking into his.

Hangman dropped his head and laughed, his tongue twirling the toothpick in his mouth. Head still lowered, he called after the receding footsteps, "Wow, I didn't know you had a heart, but since you clearly care so much about him, I'll leave Bob alone."

The footsteps stopped. Hangman turned to face them, shaking his head lightly.

"But it's gonna cost you."

Phoenix cocked one eyebrow in an ‘I knew this was coming' fashion.

"Really?" She said, crossing her arms over her chest, taking a step closer.

"Really." Hangman shot back joyfully, also taking a step closer. He was clearly enjoying this.

"Fine. I'll bite. What's your price?"

"Go on a date with me."

Phoenix scoffed, staring at him agape as if she hadn't heard him correctly or refused to believe he'd actually said what she thought he said.

"That's the worst joke you've ever made, Bagman, and you've made a lot of bad jokes." She scoffed again as she turned and continued toward the exit.

"Maybe because it wasn't a joke." There wasn't a drop of sarcasm in his voice.

"You’ve got to be kidding me," said Phoenix, turning back to him again.

"You want me to leave Bob alone? That's my price. One date, and we'll never have this issue again. I promise." He held up three fingers in a "scouts honor" kind of way.

"You’re insufferable, Bagman," Phoenix said. With that, she turned and walked down the hallway, silently fuming.

#top gun #top gun maverick #jake hangman seresin #natasha phoenix trace #hangman x phoenix #fanfic #robert bob floyd #phoenix x hangman #hannix #hangnix #seresin x trace #top gun fanfiction #fanfiction #i see you

22 notes · View notes

vampalpatine-archive · 1 year

Note

Your post about Shiv made me think for a long while bc it's true that Shiv's trauma and specifically her trauma around sex is largely misinterpreted/outright ignored by the fandom but now I'm confused bc 1. when did Tom pressure Shiv to have sex??? I mostly remember her pushing Tom to do stuff he didn't want, even while he was clearly uncomfortable, but every time he tries to initiate something and she doesn't want it he backs off right away and doesn't push. The period tracking WAS creepy and I will definitely not be defending that, but Shiv would actually make annoyed faces if Tom didn't want to do what she had planned, and insist or ask "no?" in a mocking tone when he wasn't particularly enthusiastic about it. If he ever did that to her everyone would be calling it "rapey" but bc Shiv does it it's... Girlboss I guess. Idk.

And 2. I also think there needs to be a conversation about this definitely bc yeah the ear flick was weird and the way Shiv's face FALLS and she even steps back a little??? Holy shit. Literally what I did, gasped in shock and recoiled. HOWEVER. Putting my "this is a tv show and not reality" goggles on, to me context is important I mean she's kicking dirt over his shoes to humilliate him in public (nothing new there) and getting all up in his space and the flick read like Tom just needing to do something to get her to back the fuck up and leave him alone. I've seen people dismissing Shiv's abuse of Tom completely, through the years but especially this season. And I get it, Shiv is in a vulnerable state both bc of her father passing and bc she's pregnant and conflicted about it, but none of it justifies the way she has treated Tom and keeps treating him. He did not hit her, or push her, or even start commenting on her body the way she does to him constantly. He flicked her on the damn ear lol and I GET IT, I was lowkey horrified by it at first but looking at it from Tom's pov, I have been in a situation where someone kept coming at me and getting in my face so I get that reaction. Anyway. Yeah it was a weird scene Idk where the writers are going with this!!! If they make either of them start hitting the other I'm gonna be furious tho like that'd be the last straw of bad tomshiv plot points. Like if this is them trying to Logan-ify Tom more I'm gonna be so fucking pissed lol

god there's so much of this i disagree with, and it's so long... honestly i wasn't gonna answer i was gonna say something like "i ain't reading all that" with a shiv fancam or some shit. plus you just said you randomly saw my post so you don't follow me you'll probably not read this

but the notes on that post have been bothering me all day to the point where i'm seriously thinking of shutting the fuck up about succession, and i don't want to cause it's my fav show so i'm gonna answer at least to a few things

first of all, to your question "when did tom pressure shiv to have sex?" i simply recommend rewatching retired janitors of idaho as it has one of what i consider the most disgusting scenes of the show and if you don't agree with me in that that's him pressuring her then i simply don't think we'll be able to reach any mutual understanding here, which is okay i guess.

secondly, i don't think there's any scenes in the show where shiv pressures tom to have sex or do stuff he's not comfortable with in any way that i would deem "rapey" if shiv were a man. maybe you're referring to stuff like opening the relationship? or the threesome from 2x10? both of which i would call asshole moves AT WORST.

about the "this is a tv show not reality" thing i can only say that it was a post for my mutuals that i honestly didn't expect to win traction, in fact, it was a response to another post from a mutual i had just reblogged, so it wasn't even supposed to be read on its own. obviously you don't know me, but if you did you'd probably see why it's funny you'd say that. i don't think it's a bad thing that they included this scene of tom flicking shiv's ear, i don't think its wrong to keep having tom as your favorite character, or tomshiv as your favorite relationship. i think it's a very interesting scene that adds a lot of depth to his character and their relationship and i think liking complex characters who do bad shit is so incredibly fun.

also the way you said "hey he hit her but just a little bit not like he hit her for real" is exactly what i was criticising people saying in my original post so maybe next time when you read a post you don't agree with in such a fundamental level just move on it's not that deep. block me, even, if you see it more than once and it bothers you

to wrap this up i'll just say that i HOPE they keep loganifying tom, as the parallels with him and logan have been there since the beginning, it makes him 10 times more interesting and if you took that away he wouldn't be much of a character. i HOPE tomshiv never get a divorce, as i'm rooting for the cycle of abuse to never end and keep repeating itself, i consider succession a show that runs in circles (complimentary) and would be really disappointed if there was a sudden catharsis moment where anyone at all makes it out. if i had to bet, out of the two of us, i don't think i'm gonna be the one who ends up disappointed here

15 notes · View notes

kuniicou · 11 months

Text

I've seen a couple text posts talking about Danganronpa and their dirty writing of Korekiyo Shinguji. Those people are right, but I don't think the damage is *too* bad and has a pretty easy fix.

Before I get into specifics, know I'm not talking about the mess that is his trail. I'll bring it up briefly tho.

Danganronpa has an intriguing way of writing its characters. Each one is written to be the protagonist of their story. As every character has "anime protagonist syndrome", generally they have some type of heavy trauma, but with the exception of Ultra Despair Girls(Warriors of Hope) every character doesn't seem to realize their own struggles.

With small exceptions like Chihiro's getting stronger arc or Sonia being like "ruling a kingdom is a little stressful" most Dr characters don't realize the harm that's been done to them or are very casual about it.

With the character not seeing their struggle as trauma or that bad, the narrative treats them in the same way.

Example: Mondo Owada, in his trial it's revealed he killed his brother. Looking at the situation most fans say he *didn't* kill his brother, but because Mondo's perception is that he did the story follows his narrative.

Danganronpa does this for every character.

This approach to writing is really good, but if not done correctly drastically hurts characters. Most Dr characters have unique trauma so it's not as noticeable, ie, Kiyotaka, Hiyoko, Celeste. But the ones with heavy (more realistic/more relatable) trauma shows more, like sexual assault. - to my memory three characters have sexual assault as apart of their backstory, Mikan, Akane, and Korekiyo.

Mikan has the whole fanservice deal where she needs attention at any cost, but I think she knows what she went through wasn't her fault. To a degree at least(?) - Akane, to my memory, is closer to Korekiyo's case where she doesn't know the abuse she suffered was abuse.(I'll get back to the front tails thing).

Writing Korekiyo as he doesn't know it was abuse in *any* capacity is fitting for who his abuser is. He's open minded to the fault of his safety and he trusted her so why would they ever hurt him? But because he doesn't think it was abuse, the narrative follows his perception.

To offset this and any characters that fall into this trap would be to have the protagonist recognize something isn't right. - In Kiyo's FTE he barely talks about his sister(probably to not tip people off to the twist) but to fix his issue Dr would have had to talk about her. They could leave out their relationship dynamic but they could talk about her personality. How controlling she was, how Kiyo would give into any demand because she was sick, how she was older than him, so then Shuichi/Keade could go "His sister seems very controlling but he seems happy with that arrangement." Or "I could never hang out with someone like that, I don't know how he does."

The protagonist recognizing the behavior as weird is what saved Akane(besides her trauma not being the case) when she was going off about front tails Hajime was put off. Showing that someone sees that something isn't right. .

Okay. It can't be ignored. His trail. - It was dumb. The writers wanted to show off the twist of incestuous siblings but to do that his motivation would have had to be his sister, but wait, why would he suddenly be killing for her now after years of not? I KNOW! He was always a serial killer; he was just waiting for the right moment to strike! - I'm convinced the team couldn't think of a reason to tie her into the narrative so this was the best they could come up with. (Also in their picture together Kiyo needed to look younger than he does in the game. His timeline is one of the most convoluted, I swear.)

Tldr: Korekiyo just suffers from being too subtle. The writers needed to focus a bit more onto his sister and most issues would have been fixed. Also he's not a serial killer, which makes no sense to his character.

#tw grooming #danganronpa #korekiyo shinguji #i hope this makes sense #ive been sitting on these thoughts for awhile

15 notes · View notes

codergalsblog · 1 year

Text

Fnaf revival au(headcanons):

Elizabeth is very much a dog person because she loves how energetic and playful they are, which is why she's likes being around them. She really doesn't like cats, tho. she RESPECTS them, she just doesn't like them, and the reason that she doesn't like them is because, just like me, they're mean sometimes(I respect everyone who is a cat person and this is just my opinion). Liz, whenever she goes on a walk and sees a cat, she'll side eye it to make sure it doesn't try anything(and so does the cat), but she does sometimes give a silent 'sup' to the cat she passes by, as a sign of respect.

Evan, however, more of a cat person. He does like dogs, but not as much as his sister(also, they're a little too energetic for his taste). He likes cats mainly because they sometimes remind him of himself, and also because he find it extremely funny how cats can be so comfortable in the most strangest places, like a box(or just in random places, like in between the couch, he just finds it extremely hilarious and adorable). He also likes their soft fur and likes to pet them because of it. He also likes that they purr when they're relaxed enough, it brings him a sense of comfort.

Bonus:

Speaking of comfort, Elizabeth and evan both feel a sense of safety and calmness with dogs and cats:

Elizabeth feels a sense of comfort from dogs because William would always tell Elizabeth to be perfect, to dress perfect, to act perfect, and if she didn't, he would abuse her. So, just Elizabeth seeing dogs always getting messy and just acting so carefree is a comfort to her because they don't have to be perfect or exceptional to anyone or anything, and people will still love them no matter what. Elizabeth wished that her father was like that, but unfortunately, he would never change.

For Evan, cats bring him a sense of comfort because since he was a kid, he's lived in constant fear of the nightmares, his older brother, and William. So because of that, he never felt safe almost anywhere, but whenever he sees cats wandering the street without a care in the world, he feels a sense of safety from them because they're so relaxed and flexible to him. They sometimes remind him that there's nothing to be afraid of and that things will be okay. Because of that, he wanted to ask William for a cat, but he was scared that he would just ignore him or say no.

But these are my headcanons for these two because they need some type of comfort. They've been through enough, alright. They deserve the rest 😔.

#fnaf #fnaf au #fnaf revival au #evan afton #elizabeth afton #michael afton #william afton

8 notes · View notes

to-be-a-dreamer · 2 years

Text

Julie and the Phantoms AU

What's going on y'all I've been enabled so now y'all get some half-baked angst!

Huge thanks to @we-are-inevitable for helping me finish this AU because it's been sitting on the back burner for literal months and I could never figure out all the details on my own.

CW: death, homophobia, terminal illness, emotional abuse

Okay, so! Here's the characters we're working with (they're not perfect stand-ins, this is just the general role they'll be fulfilling in the story)

Jack Kelly - Julie Molina

Racetrack Higgins - Rose Molina (he's Jack's younger brother tho)

Charlie Morris- Carlos Molina

Medda Larkin - Ray Molina

Spot Conlon - Flynn Taylor

David Jacobs - Luke Patterson

Sarah Jacobs - Alex Mercer

Albert DaSilva - Reggie Peters

Katherine Pulitzer - Willie

Joseph Pulitzer - Caleb Covington

Bryan Denton - Tia Victoria

Don't ask about Nick and Carrie, we don't talk about them, they've caused me so many problems in this AU. There's a version floating around in my brain with Spot and Race as Nick and Carrie. I've been through some things.

ANYWHO I have no idea how to structure this post because there is so much going on so we're just gonna start and hope for the best. I think we'll go by character and talk about where each of them is at the beginning of the story because I don't 100% know how everything fits together yet. Fingers crossed that this is somewhat comprehensible.

(Also, in case you haven't watched the show, Luke, Reggie, and Alex are all members of the band Sunset Curve, who died in 1995 before manifesting as ghosts in 2020. So when I'm talking about David, Sarah, Albert, and Les, their backstories take place in 1995)

Jack Kelly

Jack loves music, it’s basically his entire life. He spends all his free time out in the garage writing and playing songs with his little brother, Race. They would always talk about making it big one day and becoming a famous singing duo. But really what Jack loved was being able to share something special with his brother. He never felt closer to Race than when they were making music together. The two of them would sit side-by-side at the piano with their youngest brother, Charlie, and their adoptive mother, Medda, listening to them play and joining in when they knew the words. Those impromptu little concerts with the three people he loved most in the world were some of the happiest memories of Jack’s life.

Then Race got sick. Then Jack had to watch his fun-loving, goofy, energetic little brother waste away in a hospital bed so quickly it made Jack’s head spin. Then Jack was left with a garage full of instruments he couldn’t bear to play and half-written songs he didn't know how to finish.

He's still close with his mom and Charlie, but there's been a... shift... in the air around the house. He's written some short poems, but nothing substantial, nothing like what he used to write with Race. Jack doesn't play the piano anymore. He doesn't sing in the car or the kitchen like he used to. He hasn't even so much as hummed since Race died. He can't. Every time he even considers making music all he can think about is Race using what little strength he had left to ask Jack to sing for him one last time. All he can see is his little brother taking his last breaths as Jack sang him a soft, desperate plea. ("You'll never know, dear, how much I love you. Oh, please don't take my sunshine away")

Jack doesn't want to sing anymore. He can't sing anymore. So he doesn't. He tries to pretend that he doesn't need music anymore and just goes on with his life as best he can. He cheers at Charlie's Buddy Ball games and helps his Ma cook dinner every night and bothers his Uncle Denton at work and laughs with his best friend, Spot, and does everything he can to ignore the gaping hole in his heart.

He doesn't need music. Not really. He doesn't even want to make music without Race there to do it with him.

Jack Kelly does not need music.

He doesn't.

Don't ask why he still signs up to be in the music program the next school year. Don't ask why he can't bear to sell his keyboard like he told Medda he was planning to. Don't ask why he's so so disappointed in himself when he can't bring himself to just play when he's told he has one last chance to participate in music class before he gets kicked out.

It doesn't matter.

David Jacobs

David loves music, it’s basically his entire life. He loves singing, he loves playing guitar, he loves writing songs, he loves everything about it. He lives and breathes music, he doesn't want to do anything with his life other than make music to share with the world. That's the whole problem.

His parents have always told him he has great "potential". That he's smart enough to get into the top universities in the country and to get a full-ride basically anywhere. All he has to do is focus on his studies and fill out his resume with extracurriculars and work experience. Apparently, spending every waking hour of the day writing songs and rehearsing with his band doesn't count as "extracurriculars" to them.

He knows they just want what's best for him, he knows they just want him to get into a good college and get a good job one day. He knows that. But he just wishes they would understand that music is what he's passionate about, it's what he loves, and it's the only thing that makes him feel truly alive. David knows he's smart, he knows he could probably go to some big-shot college and become a lawyer or a doctor or something but he doesn't want to. He wants to write songs and share them with the world. He wants to do something actually meaningful with his life.

It's... tense... at home, to say the least. His parents get mad every time he brings home any grade less than an A, which is becoming increasingly more common as Sunset Curve, the band Davey started with his twin sister, Sarah, and their two best friends, Albert and Bobby, has started gaining some real traction in Hollywood. (I think Bobby is still Bobby, it doesn't really change anything about the story so he might morph into one of the Delanceys at some point, I dunno) His mom keeps signing him up for after-school activities against his wishes and then gets upset when he blows off the meetings to rehearse with the band. His dad keeps trying to get him a job at the company he works for but Davey never sticks around long enough for him to set up an interview. He manages to pacify them a bit by volunteering as an assistant coach for his little brother, Les's, little league team, but it barely helps.

The last straw for David is the day his sister, Little Miss Perfect Sarah, who had always followed every single outrageous rule and expectation his parents gave her, manages to work up the courage to come out to their parents and they act like she just confessed to a murder. There's a lot of yelling and, for the first time in his life, David worries that his mother might hit Sarah, she looks so angry. His sister leaves the house with tears streaming down her face and David moves to follow her before realizing he would be leaving Les alone with his parents looking absolutely murderous. He doesn't think they would actually hurt Les, but he's not taking any chances.

As David sits in bed with his little brother curled up at his side and trying to block out the sound of his parents fighting with each other over whose "fault" this was, David finally accepts what he's always tried to deny.

His parents would never truly accept him. He'd always wondered if he just did what they wanted, if he just worked hard to keep his grade up and joined all the clubs they wanted and got into a good college and got a good job that they would be proud of him. He had convinced himself that they would, that he was choosing their disappointment by pursuing a career in music.

But now he knew better. If they could manage to go from looking at his sister as if she'd hung the stars in the sky to borderline disowning her in a split second, they could never truly love him. Their love was and always had been conditional, and David had no intentions of fulfilling those conditions just to be accepted by the people who had never even tried to understand him.

Sarah came back after spending a couple nights at the studio (aka, Bobby's garage) but it didn't change David's mind. His mother kept insulting Sarah every chance she got and his father wouldn't even look at her. The twins spent a lot of time writing songs together at the studio, avoiding their parents together. Sarah insists that she's okay, that she had expected their parents to react the way they did and she just wanted to wait out the storm until they hopefully came around. David sees straight through her lie but doesn't comment on it.

David isn't sure what does it. But one day he's finally had enough. He comes home with yet another B- on an English paper and endures the lecture from his father and the screaming from his mother with a blank stare and no emotion in his heart other than mild disgust. Then he goes to his room, packs as much as he can into a duffle bag, and heads straight to Sarah's room. She knows exactly what he's doing without a single word exchanged between them.

"So that's it, huh?" "Come with me." "Davey, I can't" "Sarah, they're never going to change! Never. I know you want to fix things with them but there's nothing to fix. They never loved us. Not really. Not in the way you want them to." "Don't you think I know that? I'm not stupid, Davey, I know this isn't the way things are supposed to be but it's the way things are. And I- I know it's pathetic but I want them to love me. I want my parents back. So... so I have to try, Davey, just let me try." "...Fine. You know where to find me once you've had enough of their bullshit." "What should I tell Les?" "I- I'll figure that out later. I'll skip class and catch him at school before he gets on the bus and say goodbye then. I just. I can't stay here another second."

So Davey leaves and hides out at the studio. He never manages to catch Les in time to talk to him but Sarah tells him plenty of stories about what's going on at home. It took his parents three days to realize he was gone. They weren't happy. Davey couldn't care less about their happiness.

His parents don't even try to get him to come home, which just reinforces Davey's certainty that he did the right thing. According to Sarah, they're "waiting him out", expecting him to come running back to them within a week.

Davey never sees his parents again.

He's not particularly bothered.

Davey spends all of his time writing songs about anything and everything. Some of it meaningless, most of it not. He's never been that great at talking to people, so he pours every pent-up emotion he's been feeling for years into his songs. His anger towards his parents, his pleas to his sister, his regrets about his brother, his desperation to make something of himself. He writes about all of it. Some of the songs make it onto Sunset Curve's setlist, but most of them stay in his song journal.

His grades don't get any better or worse, but Sunset Curve gets big. Or, at least, big for a garage band of self-taught high schoolers with about $12 between the four of them. They start booking bigger and bigger gigs and they even manage to pull some favors and scrape together enough cash to self-record an EP.

Then their big break comes. A featured show at the Orpheum! It's everything Davey and his friends have been working towards for years. It's their chance to make it big, for real. Davey thinks about inviting his parents so they can see that he wasn't delusional, that his dreams weren't just stupid fantasies. But he talks himself out of it almost instantly. He doesn't need to prove anything to them. He doesn't want to prove anything to them. They already showed him their true colors and Davey didn't regret his choices.

The only thing he regrets is that he had to leave Les. His little brother didn't do anything wrong and he was one of the only good things about living in that house. He misses Les every single day and considers going back just for him. Sarah tells him that Les didn't handle his running away well and she can only do so much for him. Their parents haven't been taking out their anger on Les, that's the only thing giving David enough strength to stay away.

He knows it's for the best, he genuinely would have lost his mind if he had to stay in that house any longer. That doesn't make him feel any better.

His songs about Les stay private.

Sarah Jacobs

Sarah likes music. She likes her drums, even if her mother would prefer for her to spend more time practicing piano. She likes helping her brother write songs for their band and goofing off with her friends in the studio. But what she really loves is performing. There's just something about being on a stage in front of a crowd of people, buzzing with energy and knowing that she's about to blow them all away. It makes her feel absolutely electric and leaves no doubt in her mind that this is what she wants to do with the rest of her life.

If only she could muster up the courage to tell her parents that.

She admired Davey for how little he managed to care about what their parents thought. Maybe he just had a passion for music that Sarah lacked. Maybe there was more pressure on him to succeed, therefore it was easier for him to disappoint, and therefore it was easier for him to stop caring in the first place. Maybe she was just a coward.

As much as she knew that it shouldn't matter what her parents thought, as much as she knew she would be better off taking a page out of her brother's book and just doing what made her happy, as much as she knew she had what it took to succeed in music, Sarah wanted nothing more than for her parents to be proud of her. And that meant keeping her grades above a B, staying in ballet classes, going to a good college, and getting a "real" job.

Sarah hated herself for how well she played the role of Perfect Daughter. She hated how easily she slipped into the pleasant, kind, soft-spoken little girl her parents had raised her to be. She hated how she kept her head down whenever her parents ripped into David for whatever way he'd managed to disappoint them this time. She hated how no one knew who she really was, not even herself.

She wanted to be able to listen to the kind of music she liked and not be scolded for it. She wanted to wear clothes that felt like her and not like she was dressing up in a costume as someone else. She wanted to do and love and enjoy the things that she wanted to do and love and enjoy. She so was sick of pretending to be someone she wasn't. She wanted it to stop. Sarah Jacobs wanted to be herself more than anything else in the world.

Maybe that's why she did it.

Maybe that's why she had looked her mother in the eye and managed to gather up enough courage to be honest with herself for once in her life.

She wasn't sure what she had been expecting.

She knew what she had wanted. She had wanted her mother to prove her wrong. To look at her with the same amount of love and adoration she always had and to tell Sarah that she loved her no matter what she did, no matter who she loved.

Sarah isn't surprised to find herself sobbing alone, curled up on the couch in the studio after listening to two people who were supposed to love her unconditionally call her the vilest names in the English language.

And it hurts. It hurts so so much. She had always known, deep down inside, that her parents would never accept her for who she was. That was why she had always hidden her true self so deep down that even Sarah herself didn't know what her true colors were.

She had always known what would happen when she finally revealed those colors.

But knowing you're about to be stabbed doesn't make it hurt less. It doesn't stop the knife from piercing straight through your chest, making it impossible to breathe through the pain. It doesn't stop you from feeling the blade twisting inside your heart, destroying every last shred of hope.

She goes back home. David tells her to stay at the studio, that he'll take care of her there and that it'll be easier, in the long run, to cut their parents off then and there. She knows he's right. But she can't help but want her parents to love her again. If they had ever truly loved her to begin with.

So she goes back, she endures the anger and the hatred, she watches her brother leave her to pick up the broken pieces of their family all alone, she lets her parents blame her for David leaving, she lets Les scream that he hates her for not stopping him, and she lets him come back an hour later to sob through his apology.

She lets it happen.

And her parents stop screaming at her every time she walks by, resorting to ignoring her as if that meant she didn't exist. And Les stops begging her to convince David to come home, deciding he hates his older brother for leaving him and crying into David's pillow when he thinsk she wasn't looking. And Sarah plays her role of the perfect daughter when they're out in public, resisting the urge to flinch every time her mother puts an arm around her waist with a fake smile plastered on her face.

She had revealed one of her true colors and it had ruined everything.

She didn't regret it for a second.

Charlie Morris

Charlie is ten years old. That doesn't make him stupid. He understands what's going on around him, no matter how hard his mama and his older brothers try to hide just how bad things are. He knows why Medda is constantly working overtime, but makes sure it's only at night so she can spend every possible second at home with her boys. He knows why Jack looks so sad and lost all the time and why he can hardly bear to let his little brothers out of his sight for longer than a few minutes. He knows why Race isn't going to school anymore and why he doesn't help out at Charlie's Buddy Ball games like he used to and why he keeps waking up in the middle of the night with coughing fits so loud Charlie can't sleep through them even though their bedrooms are on opposite sides of the house.

He knows why Medda and Jack look so frantic when they can't get Charlie's big brother to stop coughing and just breathe and why Medda makes him and Jack stay in the other room when the ambulance comes and why Jack is holding onto him so tightly while they wait for Uncle Denton to arrive. He knows why the doctors and nurses keep giving him sad smiles while he sits in the hard, uncomfortable chair of the hospital waiting room and why his mama looks so sad when she tells him he has to say goodbye to his big brother and why Race looks so unbelievably tired as he manages to give Charlie a small smile.

He knows why Race doesn't say anything when Charlie lays down next to him and just wraps an arm around his shoulders, letting Charlie ramble about everything and nothing. He knows why Race rarely even opens his eyes over the next few days and why Jack stops driving him to school in the mornings. Instead, Uncle Denton picks him up and brings him to the hospital where Medda and Jack had spent the night. He knows why everyone looks so heartbroken when Race finally manages to stay awake long enough to talk and his only request is for Jack to sing to him.

He knows why his mama is hugging him tight to her chest, her tears soaking into his hair, as the steady beeping that was always running slowed to a stop. He knows why Jack breaks down into heartwrenching sobs as soon he finishes his song. He knows why Uncle Denton doesn't even say anything, he just pulls Jack into his arms and stares at Race. At his body.

Charlie knows why he's never going to see his big brother again. He knows why Jack won't even hum along to the radio anymore and he knows why Medda can't bear to touch anything in Race's room, even though there's dirty laundry on the floor and he knows she hates that. He knows why Uncle Denton keeps bringing homemade dinners over every single night and why he keeps smiling and joking as if nothing's wrong. He knows why his teachers don't seem mad when he doesn't have any of his homework done when he comes back to school two weeks later.

He knows what Medda and Jack mean when they sit him down and gently explain that Race had to "go away" to "be an angel". He knows that Jack can barely drag himself out of bed every morning and that Medda is struggling just to hold herself together as it is. He knows that they don't need him to be having a breakdown every time he feels like it (which is fairly often, if he's being honest). He knows that at least one person in his family needs to be okay.

So he tries his best to go back to normal, to tell Jack all about this day like he always does, even when he just wants his brother to hold him close and let him cry. Jack smiles every time, so Charlie thinks it's worth it. He tells his mama jokes and stories while she cooks dinner, even though he wants to tell her about how much he misses his brother and how angry he is that he had to go. Medda laughs at his jokes every time, and Charlie knows it's worth it.

Uncle Denton gets him a tablet for his eleventh birthday, and Charlie discovered pages upon pages of stories, information, and videos about ghosts and the afterlife. Charlie thinks a part of him knows that none of it is true, but come on, can you blame him for wishing there was a way to know Race was still out there somewhere?

That's all Charlie wants. He just wants his big brother back.

Les Jacobs

Les is ten years old. That doesn't make him stupid. He understands what's going on around him, no matter how hard his older siblings try to hide it from him. He knows that Davey and his parents are always one wrong look away from the next fight. He knows Sarah would do anything in the world to make their parents happy, even though they treat her like garbage. He knows that as soon as he's old enough for his parents to start setting expectations of him, he'll be going through the exact same things.

He knows that it wasn't Sarah's fault that Davey left, and he'll feel sick to his stomach for the rest of his life every time he thinks about the things he said to her when he was too angry and hurt to think straight.

He knows that Davey would have moved mountains for him, that he never would have left Les if he had any choice. But he still can't understand why he never even said goodbye. He can't understand why Davey never came back for him. He can't understand why Davey would leave him and Sarah to fend for themselves.

He can't decide which of his siblings is being braver, David for having the strength to get out while he still could, or Sarah for having the strength to stay and try to fix things. Either way, Les is glad to have her around and, years later, when he knows that those three months were the worst three months of his life, his biggest regret in the world is that he never took a break from his forced anger to tell Sarah how much he loved her.

His parents dismiss Sarah's invitation to the band's show with an air of annoyance and indifference, but Les couldn't be happier. Davey would be there. And as much as Les has been trying to hate his older brother for more-or-less abandoning him, he can't help but feel giddy at the prospect of seeing him again. Sarah arranges for him to ride to the show with Bobby's parents under the guise that Les is spending the night with a friend.

Les is giddy with excitement the whole week leading up to the show and, as Sarah tells him goodbye before she leaves a few hours early to run a soundcheck, Les barely even gives her a second look, too busy digging through his closet to find the matching shirt he and Davey had gotten on vacation the year before.

It's not until days later that he realizes that was the last time he saw his big sister alive.

He's not quite sure why Bobby's parents seem so worried when they arrive at the theatre. It's a bit empty outside but they are kinda early. He doesn't like how Mrs. Shaw squeezes his hand tighter while she speaks softly to the worker at the ticket booth with a mixture of shock and horror on her face. He can’t understand why Bobby is sitting alone backstage or why he bursts into tears the second he sees Les or why he can’t stop crying long enough to answer him when he asks “Where’s Davey?”

His parents don’t show up at the hospital for nearly four hours. No one can get ahold of them, apparently. Les isn’t sure where they could be. He doesn’t know what could possibly be more important.

Albert’s dad and brothers are around somewhere, Les saw them come in but they didn’t exactly exchange small talk.

Bobby and his parents are the ones to tell him what happened. Mrs. Shaw is the one to pull him in close and wrap him tight in her arms while he cries. Mr. Shaw is the one to hold his hand when they finally let him see his siblings after hours and hours of begging. Bobby is the one to hold him close when he runs out of tears and can’t bear to do anything else.

Les is ten years old. That doesn’t make him stupid. He knows that his parents are the reason Davey never came home. He knows his parents are the reason Sarah was so miserable all the time. He knows that maybe they couldn’t have done anything to stop what happened that night, but they sure as hell took away Les’ chance to say goodbye.

So when his parents finally show up having the audacity to look like they’d been crying, Les doesn’t run into his mother’s waiting arms when she calls out to him. He buries his head back in Bobby’s shoulder and ignores her, just like she ignored every desperate plea Sarah ever cried. He pulls away from his father’s uncharacteristically gentle touch and begins to walk away. And when his father tries to follow after him, like he never, ever did for Davey, Les yells at them to leave him alone, in the coldest voice he can muster.

He never quite remembers exactly what he said to them, but he knows it was all true. That they were the ones who drove Davey away, that they never once believed in him, that he was right to leave them, and that Les is surprised he stuck around for as long as he did. That they treated Sarah like she was nothing, less than nothing, that she had done everything for them, that all she had ever wanted was for them to love her. He tells them that his siblings died hating them and that he would die the same way.

He’s pretty sure Bobby’s parents stuttered out something about grief and Les not really meaning it but he did. And his parents knew he did. Because they knew he was right.

They could spend the rest of his childhood honoring his siblings and pretending they were heartbroken. They could keep trying to have a relationship with him and keep trying to “learn from their mistakes”. They could give Les the entire world and it wouldn’t change what they had done.

They had stolen something from Les that he could never get back, and he had no intentions of ever forgiving them for that.

Yeah so those are the only characters I've put a lot of thought into, so we're gonna do a rapid-fire version of the last four that are important to the plot. They'll all probably develop more as the AU goes on, and feel free to send an ask if one of them catches your eye!

Albert DaSilva

Listen, I love Reggie Peters with all my heart, he's probably my favorite character on the show. But I could not for the life of me figure out what to do with him in this AU. Jac suggested Albert be the third member of Sunset Curve and while I'm super excited to explore this version of the character, I have absolutely zero thoughts about his backstory.

Like, I guess I could do what I did with David and Sarah and just. combine his Newsies fanon backstory with his JATP counterpart's backstory, but I'm not 100% sure how to do that. He's definitely got some kind of daddy(?) issues 'cause I'm giving him Reggie's one-sided friendship with Ray/Medda

As of right now, Davey and Sarah are having a shared crisis, and Albert's just having fun hanging out with Medda and messing around with Charlie. He is simply vibing.

I told Jac that he would probably gain some trauma as the AU progressed and they responded, and I quote, "i cannot WAIT for this"

Send me an ask if you want Albert to get trauma and/or daddy issues.

Spot Conlon

Spot as Flynn is probably the best decision I have ever made in my entire life because they're such different characters but also they are exactly the same.

He’s doing all the same things that Flynn does, he tries to help Jack stay the music program, he gets mad when Jack lies to him about the band, he helps Jack get through the ups and downs of life, and he’s Jack’s #1 fan (he��ll accept being tied for first with Medda and Charlie)

It’s just. He’s also Spot. If you know what I mean. I don’t know how else to describe his role in the story, he’s Jack’s ride or die and that’s all there is to it.

Spot’s still a DJ I think, but I feel like he’s got a funny story for how he got into doing that. Or just how he ended up in the music program in general. Also, yes, during the I Got The Music scene, Jack does daydream Spot rapping. He’s very confused afterwards but I think it’s funny so it stays.

Joseph Pulitzer

He's taking on Caleb's role.

He's a creepy magician guy.

He manipulates his daughter.

He sucks.

That is all.

(I mean like I'll give him a backstory if you want but yeah, his main character trait is: sucks)

Katherine Pulitzer

Katherine my beloved!!!!

Okay so her backstory is incredibly involved with Pulitzer's (duh) so I guess this is kind of like a 2-for-1 type thing here.

Anywho, Katherine and her father were a double act together performing magic! I'm thinking around the 1970s or 1980s ish. She enjoyed performing but she wasn't a fan of her dad. He didn't really care about her, he just cared about how he could use her to make his show better.

She's only seventeen, so she doesn't really have a choice, but she's been making plans to get away from him the second she can, and then... well... she's not really sure. She's going to start out performing on her own, just to make enough money to keep a roof over her head, and then she'll figure it out from there. Maybe she'll find something she's actually passionate about. Maybe she'll be a performer for the rest of her life.

Katherine doesn't care. All she cares about is getting away and making something of herself. She doesn't care what she ends up doing with her life as long as it's something she can call hers.

Yeah so then a few months before her 18th birthday, one of her father's magic acts goes horribly, horribly wrong and that's the end of her story.

And then she becomes a ghost.

And now she's stuck under her father's thumb for the rest of eternity.

If only someone would come along and help her learn that she doesn't have to let her father define her and that she does have the power to stand up to him and take him down. And if only that someone was also very smart and funny and pretty and was a drummer in a 1995 rock band and was also struggling with figuring out who she was without her parents around to tell her....

IF ONLY

So yeah! That's more or less everything I have for this AU so far! I do have some ideas in mind for different scenes and overarching plotlines, so please please do drop an ask if you want to hear more! Ideas include but are not limited to:

Unsaid Emily scene but with Les! (I have a song in mind :D)

Wake Up scene but with Jack!

Les growing up and having to watch his siblings' best friend getting famous off the songs he stole from them (see it's even Worse because most of the songs are about his family because Davey wrote all of them)

Jack and Charlie having a nice little heart-to-heart about grief and such (it is criminal that we never got a scene between Julie and Carlos talking about how his obsession with ghosts and the supernatural was his way of coping with his mother's death)

Sarah and Katherine meeting for the first time

Albert telling Jack about Les (That scene from episode 5 where Julie calls Luke selfish and Alex+Reggie tell her about his mom)

Sarah running off to the studio after coming out to her parents (I have an idea for this scene that involves Albert! Mans gets to actually do things!)

Once again, huge thanks to Jac for their help with this AU and I hope y'all like it! I have spent two days writing this post instead of working on a paper that's due in 2.5 hours! Haha send help :D

40 notes · View notes

traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors · 8 months

Note

Tw for csa, nightmares and flashbacks, csa detail

I just wanna vent

Last night I had a horrible nightmare of getting raped. It lasted for a long time and I'm still shaken from it. It brought back many flashbacks when I woke up. Idk why but even tho it was my mom who sa me, whenever I have a nightmare of sa (which happens a lot) my mom is never the rapist? Like its either my dad or a random person. Which is weird cuz my dad never sa'ed me. Sure he did constantly commented on my body ("your ass is growing, you're growing up!") Which make me feel uncomfortable. And one time he peeked through the toilet when i was using it to see if im on my phone, which was also weird but like he ddint mean to be inapp he just wanted to make sure i wasnt on my phone. But he never really did anything physical. Anyways the nightmare brought back shitty memories. I can still feel her lips and hands on me. It makes me feel so disgusted with myself, I feel like im dirty and gross for it. Ik it's not my fault but I just can't help feeling ashamed. My mom doesn't sa me anymore but she kinda does like.lower forms of it. Like slapping my ass or touching it, but that's normal right? I mean, I don't think she really means it in an inappropriate way, like she might just think it's a cute way of showing affection. My family is really physically affectionate after all, even my dad do that. Idk man I just feel so weird rn. I feel like I wanna get away from my body, like I don't belong in this thing. I wanna rip my skin off just to feel like she's never touched me. I wish she never did this to me, I wish we were a perfect family like how other ppl think we are. Worst part is they act so nice, they're good parents. It's just when I think of my childhood it's pretty messed up. I just keep trying to push down these feelings and ignore them so I can live in this fantasy of having perfect parents, but lately it's been becoming harder to do it. Thanks for listening, I hope u guys have a great day <3

- 💛

Hi 💛,

I'm so sorry about what you've been going through, as well as the dream you had. While you said your dad didn't outright SA you like your mom did, it sounds like he's still made inappropriate comments towards you and touches your butt. Please know that these things are unacceptable and you don't deserve to be treated this way.

It can be confusing when we dream of scenarios that are a bit different from our actual trauma, and it's natural to wonder why these details are changed in the dream. Sometimes our brains experiment with different dynamics to see how that changes the situation. Because for example there is quite a big difference between being raped by a stranger and being raped by your mom, and perhaps entertaining the idea of it being a stranger is a way to navigate and understand the dynamic between you and your mom. But sometimes its more symbolic or metaphorical. For example, if you dream about your dad being the perpetrator, perhaps it could symbolize the ways he makes you feel uncomfortable in your own body. Especially with trauma, it's natural for dreams to be a way to process and make sense of your experiences.

While it's okay for families to be physically affectionate, it must come with a certain level of care and respect for others' boundaries, which sounds absent in your family dynamic. It sounds like your family crosses physical and sexual boundaries under the guise of "normal" affection. Normalizing this behavior is what enables the abuse to continue. Please know that your body is yours and you deserve the right to say who can or cannot interact with it.

If you can access or afford it, a mental health professional such as a therapist can best help you process your trauma, the dreams you've been having, and equip you with useful coping tools that you can take with you along your healing journey.

I hope I could help and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

#mod bun #trauma talks #tw abuse #tw child abuse #tw sa #tw csa #tw r #💛

4 notes · View notes

tojisblunt · 3 years

Text

OVERSTIMULATION HCS — genshin edition.

hcs — original, not requested.

AUTHOR’S NOTE. my first genshin work... hehe im so very excited to get back into the writing game ^_^

CHARACTERS. diluc, dainsleif, zhongli, xiao.

+ includes. overstimulation (duh...), daddy kink, size kink, squirting, multiple orgasms, fingering, slapping, mean!xiao, praise, edging

PLEASE KEEP IN MIND THAT I AM A DARK CONTENT BLOG.

— DILUC.

he overstimulates you because he’s not even aware of it in the first place.

diluc is a certified himbo, i swear. he loves u so much and would do anything for your pleasure.

but the thing is.......he’s too focused to realized that you’ve been doing nothing but cumming.

he only realizes once you squirt all over him, your cream soaking his digits and your cum bleeding through the sheets.

“d-diluc!” you squeal, back arching and hips shooting forward into his fingers as he continues to move them around inside of your weeping cunt. diluc’s other hand is focused on your tits while his dick is standing up proud, the red tip angry from how horny he was.

he just wants you to cum on his fingers before he makes you cum again and again on his cock, but poor little diluc; he’s far too focused on your pretty tits to notice that you’ve cum a long time ago.

“baby,” you cry, putting your hand over your mouth to muffle the embarrassing sounds leaving your lips as you feel his finger tips graze against your favorite spots. his palm is catching your clit every time his hand creates a motion, and it makes your legs quiver and the knot in your stomach to tighten.

“just cum, baby, it’s okay.” diluc reassures you, and you want to smack him. he’s been spewing bullshit about wanting you to cum when you’ve been doing that this whole time.

“i-i can’t!” you sob, head thrown back when he stops thrusting his fingers for a second, opting to grind the pads of his finger tips against your g-spot. it sends electricity through your body, and you can’t help but tighten around his fingers, body quivering as you experience a body-wracking orgasm.

you’re crying underneath him, eyes widening as you unconsciously spread your legs further open, feeling your orgasm drag out for much longer than planned.

you curse, squirting all over your boyfriend’s fingers and abdomen, thrashing your head side to side from the overwhelming feeling of a mind numbing orgasm that you just experienced.

“oh.” diluc stills, realization hitting him as he processes what just happened. “sorry,” he says sheepishly, and you roll your eyes. he cleans off your cum from his fingers, bringing your body closer to his lower half as he lines up his cock against your pussy.

“what are you—?!”

“—who said i was done?”

he’s gonna be the death of you.

— DAINSLEIF.

likes to do it because you look so pretty crying underneath him.

and also because he’s a service dom who’ll do anything for you to be happy in his sheets :P

loves to edge you tho... it makes your orgasms make you really sensitive after and he just loves the reactions.

tbh everything u do is attractive to him but if ur extra sensitive? u become a lot cuter to him.

“s-sen..” you blabber, and your boyfriend simply does nothing but looks up at you, keeping his eyes focused on your face to watch for any hints of uncomfortableness on your end.

“repeat that?” he asks, slamming his hips against yours purposefully, hoping to get a reaction out of you; in which, he does. dainsleif knows you too well, your body included. he knows where to hit it to get a certain reaction out of you.

“too sensitive!” you cry out in response to his thrust, feeling your thoughts swirl around as dainsleif begins thrusting into you slowly, before his rhythm speeds up. “no, no, no, no...” you trail off, mind going blank as your brains get fucked out of you.

“you can take it,” he says, soothing his hands over your stomach to reassure you that he’s still there. “my good girl, you look so pretty like this.” he smiles, face showing nothing but complete adoration for you as you cry beneath him, legs spread and cunt almost red from the abuse it’s taken from his edging.

no matter how much you want to finally cum, the stinging that you feel as he rocks his hips against yours is so good yet so painful that you’re not sure what to tell him. he’s been edging you for so long that you’re not even sure if you really did cum.

dainsleif knows how sensitive you get every time he stops his thrusting to edge you. the cries that leave your lips once he begins thrusting again, it’s all so good. but, as he watches you babble incoherent words, he decided that it was enough.

after all, nothing beats the sight of you cumming all over his fat cock.

— ZHONGLI.

LET ME TELL YALL ABOUT HIS BIG ASS DICK. (i would know i experienced it first hand)

dear gawd this man has such a size kink... thousands of years of struggling to find someone that would take his cock properly is finally catching up to him!!!!!

because now he found a cute lil plaything such as yourself who gets off on the fact that his dick cant fit easily

and the amount of times he’s made you cum before being fully in... it’s embarrassing but did you expect any less from a dragon?

“daddy!” you gasp, feeling his fat cock throbbing against your sensitive walls. even after years of experience in bed with your boyfriend, zhongli, your poor little cunt still struggles to take his much bigger cock.

you don’t complain, however, no matter how much your pussy hurts the next day from the stretching it received the previous night. no, how could you complain when he makes you feel so good?

“hm?” zhongli hums, keeping his grip on your thighs strong so he has control of how spread out you are for him. using that fact to his advantage, he brings your thighs further apart, cock twitching at the sounds of your mewls from the feeling of his cock hitting deeper.

“f-feels...i feel so good, daddy...” you sniffle, bringing your hand to his abdomen to rub on it, just for your own satisfaction of having your hands on him 24/7. you’re obsessed with having zhongli’s skin against yours, and he finds it so adorable the way you depend on his touch.

“yeah?” he quips, slowly grinding his pelvis against your sensitive clit, causing your mewls to transition to slightly louder moans. he takes note of how sensitive you can get sometimes, which is why he’s careful with exactly where he’s hitting his cock, but his cock is just too big that he sometimes accidentally (more like purposefully) grazes it against your g-spot.

he feels it before his brain could process your loud cries of pleasure. “i’m cumming, fuck! oh fuck!” you gasp, hands gripping the sheets and back arching as you cum hard all over your boyfriend’s cock.

he quickly puts his thumb on your clit, rubbing gentle circles on it to help ride out your orgasm, and you’re crying from the overwhelming feeling of his hands on your clit. your legs are shaking, and your moans have grown too loud, forcing you to cover your mouth in a desperate attempt to keep the maids from hearing you.

“daddy, please,” you sniffle, mind blank from how fucked out you already are. zhongli smiles, caressing the side of your face before he brings your legs over his shoulders, loving the wide eyed reaction that you gave him.

“you can take more, right darling?” he smirks, doing a few experimental thrusts against your sensitive pussy. but before you could even process anything, you’re cumming all over his cock for the second time.

— XIAO.

LITERALLY ONE OF THE MEANEST!!!!

does it purely bc he loves it when ur crying like a dumb little whore

he just loves to fuck u into oblivion so ur rendered speechless :blushes:

degrades u whenever u cry bc of overstimulation, but gets so soft when u apologize for cumming too much :( i love him..

“nngh!” you bite your lips the hardest you could, eyebrows furrowing as you throw your head back. your eyes are rolling to the back of your head, and the continuous trembles that are going through your body right now has your boyfriend holding onto you to support.

he keeps his eyes locked on your cunt, eyes scanning the way you wrap around his cock perfectly, cream soaking his dick as you cum over and over on his cock. you’re too overstimulated at this point, one simple move from him can have you cumming again.

“you don’t stop do you?” he teases, and you wiggle your hips in place in response to the proud smirk adorning on his face. “feel good?” he asks when he notices that your panting has calmed.

you nod, still lost for words as your brain is jumbled from the numerous orgasms your boyfriend was so considerate to give.

he ghostly leaves his thumb resting on your throbbing clit, ignoring the small whines that leave your lips in reaction. he then brings your legs over his shoulders with his free hand, and you can’t do anything but just give him a hesitant look.

“what?” he asks, leaning down and placing both hands on either side of your head. “don’t you cream so nice and hard like this? hm?” his vulgar words bring arousal to your hot cunt, enough arousal where your hips jumped from the sudden stimulation it brought to your clit.

“daddy...” you sniffle, feeling his cock throb inside your awaiting cunt. he gives you a single glance before thrusting hard once against your hips. hard enough that it would be pleasurable for the both of you.

“you talk too much,” xiao sighs, and you squirm, impatience settling in your bones. “quit it.” he grunts, lifting his hand to land a quick slap on your face, causing you to gasp.

“no, fuck!” you cry, hands immediately rushing to his arms for support as your body trembles underneath his, cunt completely losing it on his cock.

xiao swallows, head going light from the intense arousal that he’s feeling as he watches you cum just from him slapping you.

if overstimulation can get you to cum this easy, then you better be sure as hell that he’s going to fuck you insanely stupid every time.

#genshin impact x reader #genshin impact smut #genshin impact x reader smut #genshin smut #xiao x reader #zhongli x reader #diluc x reader #dainsleif x reader #dainsleif smut #xiao smut #zhongli smut #diluc smut #hc.sins #📂.headcanon

12K notes · View notes

harringtonspolaroids · 2 years

Text

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐩𝐭. 𝟔 | 𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐯𝐞

a/n: this took me so long to finish but i hope the length makes up for it! also if you cant tell i started listening to tosotd near the end so yas ig? this is also not proofread so enjoy

word count: 3359

warnings: slightly toxic relationship? some angst? not rly tho; bad characterization and development; allegations to billy's abuse but not rly; a twinge of misogyny; cursing; mentions of sex but no smut; a happy ending but im 100% going to make it angsty next time so; underage drinking

relationships: billy hargrove x reader; steve harrington x reader except not really y/n is mean to him tho; platonic! nancy wheeler x reader

It had been raining when Billy had shown up to your house the first night.

You hadn’t been doing much, after all it wasn’t even ten, until you heard the knock on your door. Fixing up your nightgown you opened the door, and there he stood. Billy. Except, he didn’t look like himself. He was bleeding from a cut on his cheekbone.

“Oh my god, are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Billy mumbled as he stepped past you inside. “Do you have something to clean this with?”

“I can try to find something, just… sit down.”

Billy absentmindedly nodded as he sat on the far edge of your couch, his leg bouncing impatiently.

You searched through the nearest closet until you found a random first aid kit you had bought several years ago. Taking out a gauze and saline you sat down next to Billy, holding his face in your hand.

Billy hissed as you applied the cool liquid on the cut.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. It doesn’t hurt.”

“Are you gonna tell me how you got this?”

“I got in a fight.”

“With who?

“I dunno. Some guy in the alley.”

“Billy. Look at me.”

Billy finally shifted his gaze towards you. “Like I said. Some guy in the alley. He was acting like an asshole. It wasn’t even that bad. He ended up worse.”

“Who started it?”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“B-”

“Look, I came here, because I figured you wouldn’t ask questions. Jesus, if I wanted this I would just gone to the police station. Can you please just- hurry and finish this.”

You could feel like he was lying. His eyes were shifty and he was avoiding your gaze. Still, you didn’t press.

“I’m done.”

You looked into his eyes, trying to find some warmth in them but it was gone. It surprised you how quickly he could change from such a sweet, caring guy to… whatever this was.

“Do you want to stay?”

“I’m good.”

Billy stood up, ready to leave as quickly as he had arrived.

You grabbed after Billy’s hand, “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.” Billy pulled away from you and grabbed his jacket, leaving once again.

This was only the first of several times.

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

Once again your relationship with Billy was a mess. You would hook up, talk about whatever meaningless things were on your mind (most of it being shit talking the people at school), and leave, letting you feel even more in love. Then he would randomly show up to your house for you to do your best to comfort him after the dozens of fights he got into, only to ignore you for a day or two until he needed you. It was exhausting.

“What are we?”

“Excuse me?”

“I said,'' What are we? Or am I not allowed to ask that question too.” You leaned against the brick wall behind the gym, where you and Billy had just “coincidentally” met, and waited expectantly for his answer.

“I don’t know.”

“Well, you take me, sometimes, on dates. And we hook up. But you also don’t want me around you. So what is that supposed to mean?”

“Like I said I don’t know.”

“Do you even like me?”

“Yes- no, I mean, define like.”

“So you do like me! You just don’t have the guts to say it. Who would’ve guessed?”

“It’s not that, it’s- I don’t know what we are yet, okay? Why do we even have to put a name on it, Christ, you’re… fun and smart and I like talking to you.”

“You know what, I think that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me, without adding just a twinge of some disgusting remark.”

Billy scoffed and stepped closer to you. “As if you don’t like it.”

“And so you ruined it.” You let out a quick laugh, a plan of sorts starting to form in your mind. “So… if we aren’t anything, then you wouldn’t mind if I maybe went with Steve to the Fall Break party this week, would you?”

“And why would you do that when I’m right here, doll?”

“Maybe you’re getting a little boring.”

“I highly doubt that.”

You pulled Billy closer to you, fiddling with his collar of his half buttoned shirt. “Just think about it. It’ll be a fun… game for us. ”

“This isn’t like you at all.”

You shrugged, smoothing out the wrinkles on Billy’s top. “Maybe. But someone’s gotta keep having major mood swings too, right?”

You turned, walking back towards the school. All you could hope was that Billy would get the hint.

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

“So… we’re good?”

You put on the sweetest face you could manage and leaned closer to Steve, “Of course we are silly. I could never be that mad at you.” You were just lying through your teeth at this point. You didn’t care about Steve. You cared about Billy. And you were willing to do whatever it took to get his eyes back on you.

“That’s awesome! You know, I kinda thought you had a thing for that jerk but I knew you’d come to your senses soon enough. Want me to walk you to class?” Steve gave you a crooked smile, his hand reaching for your shoulder. You immediately shrugged him off, ignoring the first part of his sentence. “No thanks. Let’s just try to keep this… private. You aren't exactly high on the social ladder, so to speak.”

“Oh,” Steve’s smile faded. You had forgotten how whiney he could be sometimes. God knows how many times you had deluded yourself into thinking you liked him.

“I’ll see you later though, at my place, for the party. Got it?”

Steve gave a weak nod and you stood up from your chair, you were ready to leave this awkward hellhole. Careful to check no one was there, you exited the library. This party had to be one of your best.

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

You felt Nancy’s eyes on the back of your head as you applied the final layer of polish on your nails. You had invited her over, as sort of a peace treaty, before the party. You two had a type of truce going on. You weren’t exactly the bestest friends you used to be but you didn’t hate each other.

“So what's with you and Jonathan?” You asked in an attempt to spark a conversation.

“Oh, um, we’re just friends.”

“You sure about that?”

“Of course! Why would you think it was anything more?”

You turned around from your spot on your desk to meet Nancy’s eyes. “Hellooo, have you seen the way he looks at you? He gets all like puppy dog eyed.”

“Shut up he does not!” Nancy was starting to turn red at your comments. “If anything, we should talk about you going out with Billy!”

“I am not going out with Billy-”

“Oh you so are, everyone knows-”

“They do not because there is nothing to know in the first place!”

“They do! Please, he’s always looking for you in the hall and he’s always giving Steve shit about you.”

“Really?”

Nancy slid off the bed to sit next to you on your loveseat. “Uhhh, yeah! C’mon you can’t tell me you haven’t noticed.”

“I haven’t!”

“You’re lying! Look at me.”

You gave Nancy the most deadpan look you could manage and she snorted. “You’re kidding right? He even asked me about you once.”

“What? When? What did you say?” If you were honest you thought Billy hadn’t even remembered that you had told him you and Nancy were friends.

“He asked on like the first day, in Chemistry. He sits behind me and he asked me if I knew who you were. I just said you were, like, a cheerleader. I didn’t give him much.” Nancy gave you an awkward smile.

You let out a sigh of relief. Nancy hadn’t been a bitch and Billy hadn’t tried anything with her. “That’s not too bad.”

“Yeah.”

After a pause, you felt like you were about to burst. You had to tell someone. “I’ve been hooking up with Billy for like 2 weeks now.”

“Excuse me? Y/N you’re- are you serious? I thought you just like flirted with him, I was totally joking, you’re actually sleeping with him? Do you have any idea- I-”

You flashed Nancy a stiff smile, you’re voice getting tenser as you spoke, “What it’s not like a crime, he's a good lay, and it’s nothing major it’s just that, no emotions or feelings involved whatsoever, it’s not like I care about him and he cares about me, right? Right?”

Nancy stared at you, her mouth open. “Y/N… does Steve know?”

You groaned and leaned on her shoulder, “No, he thinks I don’t even like him. Nance, you have to promise me you won’t tell anyone. Please.” You moved away from her to look her in the eyes.

Nancy grabbed your hand, “I swear I won’t tell anyone, okay? You can trust me.”

“Good.”

You had missed having a best friend, someone you could rely on. Even though you couldn’t open up to Nancy completely, you could at least tell her some things, and that had to count for something.

Just as Nancy started to ask you a question the doorbell rang. You turned to look at the clock, it was already 8. The time you had promised Carol and the group you could start pregaming.

“Shit. You wanna stay up here until it’s time or?”

Nancy nodded, “I don’t really want to see them and I don’t think your friends really want to see me either.”

“Okay.” You stood up, squeezing Nancy’s hand for some reassurance. You heard Tina’s scratchy voice yelling at you from downstairs, telling you to hurry up. Hopefully the party won't leave your house completely in ruins.

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

You feigned interest as Steve talked to you about his day. You were in the most “isolated” corner you could find, though you still felt cramped. You weren't paying much attention to the boy in front of you, you were more focused on what Billy was saying that made some girl laugh so hard. The guy was fun, but not that much.

“I’m gonna tell him- Y/N- Y/N/N, hello are you here?”

You looked back at Steve, his face scrunching up in annoyance. “Did you even hear me?”

“Yeah, yeah, you were, uh, talking about the basketball team right?”

“Uh huh. Coach is thinking of benching and so, what I’m going to tell him is to-”

You smiled and nodded once again, as you started to tune out Steve, barely hearing what he had to say. The girl seemed to be having the time of her life with Billy and you were stuck with option number two. The whole point of this game was for you to make Billy jealous, not the other way around.

“Hey, I’m going to get a drink, why don’t you go mingle for a bit, I’ll be right back,” you interrupted.

“Sure, I’ll see you in a few.”

You gave Steve a quick kiss on the cheek, hoping Billy would notice, as you walked over to the kitchen, taking a shot of who knows what, that was laid out on the table.

You scanned the area around you until you found Tina laughing with some guy on the football team. The moment she noticed you watching her, she stopped and went over to you.

“What’s going on?”

“Do you know her?” you motioned to the girl who was now resting a hand on Billy’s shoulder, leaning onto him on the couch.

“Oh, her? That’s Heather Holloway. She's in my Math class. What about her?”

“What’s her fucking deal? Who does she even think she is?”

“I don’t know, I think her dad’s like the owner of the newspaper or whatever.”

“You got any dirt on her?”

“Uhhh, no. But- I can try to find some things about her.”

“Good. Come find me if things escalate between them”

You found another shot glass and drank it, leaving Tina. You moved throughout the bodies in the room, unsure of where exactly you were planning on going. Jesus christ this party was gonna be a horrible mess to clean up.

Rolling your eyes at Carol and Tommy making out in a corner, you spotted Nancy holding a water bottle, and went straight to her.

“You’re not drinking?”

Nancy looked back up at you, shaking her head, “After Halloween, I don’t think I’m ever gonna be in the mood for alcohol ever again. What’s wrong with you? Is this not fun?”

“It is- it’s just exhausting, y’know. I just wanted to ask you something.”

Nancy shot you a smile, “Spill.”

“Would you mind if I got back together with Steve?”

“I thought you were into Billy-”

“It’s hard to explain but I just need Steve for a-”

“A scheme? Y/N/N you can’t just play with people’s emotions, it's wrong and you know that.”

“I’m willing to face the consequences, Nance. Trust me, it’s gonna work out, I’m sure of it.”

“You don’t need my permission. If you want to date Steve, that's your issue. I won’t be mad.” Nancy looked worried, like she always did whenever you came up with a plan. “Just- please don’t get in trouble.”

You gave her a tight smile, “I won’t.”

You left Nancy, figuring enough time had passed for you to go look for Steve.

You found Steve wallowing against the stairs, paying attention to Jonathan who seemingly just showed up. You were so giddy with anticipation of how you were going to win in the end that even he couldn’t even annoy you. And just in luck for you, Steve was just within eyesight of Billy and Heather.

You grabbed Steve’s hand and dragged him closer to you, making sure you made a show out of it. “What are you doing right now?”

“Uhhh… nothing waiting for- for you, why-” Steve looked around nervously.

You cradle his face in your hands pulling him closer to you. “How about you do me?”

“Jesus, Y/N-”

You smiled and kissed Steve’s jaw stopping to turn around, acting as if you were shy, when in reality you were trying to spot Billy. And you did find him. Heather was trying to practically sit on his lap, all while Billy was glaring daggers at you. But you didn’t mind. If Billy said you weren’t a couple and he could flirt with other girls, then you could be with Steve. After all, isn’t all fair in love and war?

“C’mon” you nipped at Steve’s ear. “I’ve never wanted you more than I do now.” You had never lied more than you were now.

You giggled as you grabbed Steve’s hand and walked him upstairs heading to your bedroom.

The moment you shoved him on your bed you heard a knock at your door.

“It’s busy!”

The knocking remained. “I said, I’m busy!” You yelled back. Of course the universe wanted to stop you now that everything was finally falling into place.

“Just ignore them-”

“Shut up Steve.”

You got off Steve, and walked to the door, opening it up to a stressed looking Tina. “Did you not hear me? I said, I’m busy. Unless it’s an emergency, I don’t want to hear it.

“It’s Holloway. She’s trying to convince him to ditch.”

“Oh you’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

Tina moved away from you, trying to not get in your way.

You turned to look at Steve, “I have to go. Sorry!” Steve only gave you a half hearted smile.

At least you didn’t hook up with him. You shoved Tina to the side as you walked downstairs, hoping maybe you could spot Billy and Heather leaving so you could chew him out for it later. Instead you stumbled into him right as you reached the bottom of the stairs.

“Why are you leaving him so soon? Could Stevie not get it up or did he finish too quickly for you?” Billy snickered, he was practically rubbing it in your face now. You thought his reaction would’ve been more different.

“Oh you are in no position to be talking right now, how could you?”

“How could I what?”

“Heather? Really? That bitch?”

“What did she do to you?”

“More like what didn't' she do! Why would you hook up with her?”

“Did you forget you were about to fuck Harrington?”

“You knew I would have never.”

Billy snorted, “Of course you wouldn’t have. The same way I wouldn’t have hooked up with Heather.”

“You are so frustrating! Why don’t you just leave like you were planning on?”

“So that girl was eavesdropping on me!”

You rolled your eyes at his comments.

“C’mon, I thought you wanted a break.”

“And I thought you wanted to date me, so I guess we were both wrong,” You spat. Sure, you were pissed at Billy and Heather but you were mostly mad at yourself. You hated how Nancy was right that this was going to fail and you hated how now, Steve probably thought you were after him.

“I’m going to take a breather. Maybe you should just leave me alone.”

“Y/N-”

You moved past Billy and left the party, heading straight to your car. You didn’t know where you were going to go, but you figured anywhere was better than here.

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

It looked like a thunderstorm was about to happen. You tugged on the sleeves of your cashmere sweater trying to let your thoughts drift away from the party. It had been three days since the Fall Party. You didn’t want to call what happened between you and Billy a fight but it sure felt like it. He hadn’t called, or shown up to talk to you, and you ignored him as well. You had told him to leave you when all you really wanted was him yet you just had to self sabotage. You rested your head against the cold window of your bedroom, trying to let the pitter patter of the rain lull you to sleep, when you heard a harder tap on your window, that was certainly not the rain. You ignored it for a few seconds until it started to annoy you, and so you looked down the window seeing a sight you didn’t expect.

You opened the window quickly rambling“What the hell are you doing- are you insane? You’re going to freeze out there! Why didn’t you just knock-”

“Look I just want to talk- can we just do that?”

You slammed the window shut and ran down your staircase opening the door. Billy stood there, his jacket soaking wet from the pouring rain. You immediately reached for him, getting him inside. You crossed your arms as you spoke, “You could get a cold B, that’s not.. safe.”

“We’ve done worse things.”

“What do you want?”

“I wanted to apologize.”

“Excuse me?” Billy was a lot of things, but he was not the type to admit his mistakes.

“I don’t like it when we… argue. I was mad. I don’t want to see you with Harrington.”

“And I don't want to see you with Heather.”

“I swear, I don’t like her. She was just the first chick who came up to me.”

“Billy-”

“Look, I- I have a lot fucked up shit going on. I don’t want to get you involved.”

“But I want to be involved. You should be able to trust me.”

“I don’t want you to leave.”

“And I won’t.” You stepped closer to Billy holding his hand in your face. “No matter what happens, if you let me, I’ll be here for you.”

Billy stared at you with those deep blue eyes of his. “You really mean that?”

“Of course I do.”

For the first time, Billy didn’t say anything, he just pulled you into a hug. There was nothing vulgar about it. It was just sweet, something that you had longed for. You held each other like that for god knows how much. You knew you loved him, and you hoped he could know that without needing you to say it.

#billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove x y/n #billy hargrove imagines #partners by blairwritesthings #run on sentences? i hardly know her

121 notes · View notes

fairieboywhump · 2 years

Text

Evidence

listen i dont have a good title for this its just a short something random i came up with that has 0 plot relevance :3c. takes place a few months after this tho

Nicholas belongs to @spookyboywhump

TWs: mentions of nsfw/noncon (literally one sentence its not explicit at all), pet whump, photos of abuse (nicky likes keepsakes okay i didnt create this man bring that up with allen) uhhhh thats it its not really whumpy theyre just looking at photos

~~~~~~~~

"You're such a pretty thing, little one." Nicholas chuckled, carding a hand through Cathal's hair and scratching behind his ear. Cathal hummed softly, almost a purr. He warily eyed the photographs spread across the coffee table, dozens of images of himself in dirty, degrading positions.

Many of them involved weapons, injuries, fingers prodding open wounds or squeezing his face to show off his tears. His heart jumped into his throat as his eyes landed on a particularly vulgar image, his legs tied open with Nicholas' hand between them, tears painting his cheeks and his humiliation apparent. "I missed you," Nicholas continued, "you really are such a good boy. My favourite puppy."

Cathal whined in the back of his throat, shoving down his undesirable feelings, thoughts of how Nicholas didn't need to leave, didn't need to disappear and leave him tamped down firmly in the hopes that he can ignore them entirely and focus on now. He tapped his fingers against the inside of his own thigh, hoping also to expel the nervous energy he felt at the way Nicholas spoke to him.

Something was off.

Clearly, it was. He had been gone for so long. He hadn't announced himself, he hadn't said goodbye, just dropped Cathal off back at Teddy’s door and left. After Cathal had taken care of him. For weeks. And now he was back, and he was there. Cathal was back at his side, back as his favourite. Aside from the change in location, there wasn't a single difference. So why did it feel so wrong?

Nicholas stood up, smiling at Cathal almost fondly for a moment before walking away to another room. A few seconds passed, Cathal's eyes fell on a photo and he smiled sadly.

They had all been taken before Nicholas left, to go wherever he had gone. In this particular image, the two of them seemed… content. Like perhaps, Nicholas really did care about him. It was softer, more tame than the others. He had Cathal sat in his lap, one gloved hand on the pet's thigh to keep him close and the other in his hair. Cathal gazed longingly into Nicholas' eyes, an abundance of cuts and bruises and other wounds scattered across his body; exposed by the skimpy outfit he had been dressed in. His collar was different, even. A delicate pink thing with a little bow and a bell, handpicked for him by Nicholas. He thought it was sweet, then. A mark of his obedience. He didn't need to be restrained by his throat, by thick leather and a padlock. Just a strip of ribbon to show that he was, in fact, owned.

He had never expected to wish for leather and a padlock.

The photo evoked a litany of emotions within him, and he glanced around to be sure Nicholas wasn't watching before he pulled it off the table and folded it up, slipping the paper into the bottom of his sock to be sure it would go unnoticed on his person. Who ever looked at his socked feet anyways?

The sound of approaching footsteps startled Cathal back into reality and he scrambled back into proper kneeling position. Nicholas eyed him slyly as he walked back to his chair, like a predator to his prey, amused at the way Cathal squirmed under his gaze. He ignored the reactions, the frightened look on his sweet little puppy face, and sat down to gather the photographs across the table together into one stack. Cathal’s breath caught in his throat as he did, and Nicholas took note, beginning to flip through the photos while keeping an eye on the puppy's reactions.

Nicholas had seen all of the pictures before. He had likely flipped through them dozens of times, simply entertained by how easy it always was to convince the pet that he really, truly loved him. No matter what he did, how many times he broke him, Cathal would come crawling back, begging to be forgiven as if it really was all his fault, all the pain and misery and torture he was put through brought to right some karmic injustice. As if the entire point of him wasn't to be hurt and degraded as such a pathetic, broken little thing. Really, how could he not be amused? How could he not capture every moment of it to revisit?

He paused as he flipped through the stack of photographs, reaching the one he had placed on top again without a particular image coming up. As he did, he noticed Cathal's breathing pick up, and the boy stared at his hands and the photos he held with such an intensity - it wasn't a difficult conclusion in the slightest, although he did wonder where on the puppy the photo was hidden. Nicholas placed them back on the table, turning to look at Cathal and raising a brow.

"What's got you so interested in these all of a sudden, puppy?" He asked, playing like he was genuinely intrigued and unknowing. "You seemed so shy when they were taken, little one, I thought you hated to look at them. What's changed in the two minutes I was gone?"

Cathal's face reddened as he looked away from the table, eyes on his own lap. Nicholas laughed quietly and brought a hand to Cathal's chin, forcing his gaze up and placing a kiss on his lips. Cathal sighed and let his eyes flutter shut, leaning in for more before Nicholas pulled away and smirked at him. "You really are so sweet, little one. Such a shame I couldn't take you with me. I know your owner doesn't appreciate what an obedient little toy you are."

#cathal #nicholas #my ocs #my writing #other peoples ocs #allens ocs #allen will like type my whole url for his tag for my ocs and then im like nah bro spookyboywhump who thats just allen #thats just my dude allen #:3c

30 notes · View notes

prttydolls · 3 years

Text

Something more ༄ D.m

Request:Yes by @getouttofmyhead!

Warnings:kissing, swear words?, abuse use of commas

Wc:1,101

A/n:pretend Felix Felicis, doesnt take 6 months to brew, only a week. Cedric became a ghost, even tho cedric died voldy didn't come back. Now I'm ending this long a/n.

What the fuck?! Yn, with potter?! This isn't right..

It has been a week since, Yn confessed to me, I rejected her. I didn't know why, I guess I was looking forward to Astoria than yn..

But I never thought she could already find a new fucking.. Friend?! I'm supposed to be her only friend! It wasn't fair. Then an idea popped up my head.

I'm gonna win her back.

3rd pov ::

Hogwarts, was busy with students as usual. Yn was still hanging out with Harry and other gryffindors. But Draco didn't stick to Astoria for some reason. They drifted off apart. Especially draco since they went on their 2nd date

"Oh shit I'm sorry!" Yn yelped. She Had bumped into someone, it was draco. "Agh, sorry it's my fault here." he handed her his hand. Her eyes widened

"I'm fine thanks." she spat harshly and left the hall way mixing through the students. Shit- draco thought. "Hey mate!" Blaise Zabini. That git. "what do you want Zabini?" Draco replied coldly. "Your trying to win yn back are you?" the other man chuckled, great theodore nott and blaise Zabini found out?! "How did you know?!" the Blonde moved swiftly dragging them into a a empty room.

"Mate, you left your dia— journal. at the common room." Theo handed the book to the boy. "What—" the Blonde was cut off. "Weʼll help you” blaise offered. “In return, you have to give us 30 galleons, each.” they both said in usion. “Fine.” the slytherin caved in.

“Great! Okay. I know for a fact that we're gonna share potions with yn, so we can swap chairs.” said theo. “Alright then? She still won't talk to me.” draco groaned. “She will! I slipped inside of snapes office, I saw the planning sheet for today, which is a project group.” blaise joined in showing a piece of parchment to the two boys.

“Since your obviously snapes golden boy, he wouldn't mind you pairing up with me and yn.” theo pointed out. “What makes you think id—” he was cut off again. “You need a wing man don't you?” draco slowly nodded„ “Then that's why I'm needed! I've read romantic novels with daphne, and we just need to make everything a cliché.”

“I trust you” draco hissed grabbing 60 galleons from his wallet and handing them 30 each, as promised.

Yns pov ::

“What class do guys have?” I asked the trio, I still couldn't believe that draco and i ran into eachother. It's his fault. “Ehh, divinations..” Harry and Ron muttered. “I've got arithmancy, sorry (your nickname)..” hermione scratches her neck. Great I'm all alone for 2nd period is what I would've said—

“Oh it's alright, see you at lunch!” as we departed all of our ways„ I was shocked. The class room was filled by none other than draco malfoy, and his fucking friends. Oh fuck me—what the hell am I gonna do?! It's just the four of us. Greeeaaaaat.

I decided to ignore them and sit in front where my table was„ but also draco was behind me. I pretended to write something— not write.. Scribble.

As the time went on, Snape arrived so did the other students, I felt less tense.. It wasn't awkward anymore thank god– even if it was silence it was still preassuing me alot.

“Alright, students we will be creating the Felix Felicis, as you all know this is one of the most trickiest ones so be careful. If one bit is wrong then everything goes.” he goes silent and walks towards some random hufflepuffs talking. “BOOM!” Snape finished his words and walking back to the front.

“We will be working with partners of three, you have until the end of the week, you have 5 minutes to choose your group just raise your hand. Quietly.” then he went back writing on some random piece of parchment on his desk.

3rd pov ::

Whispers filled the room immediately, draco and theo were planning on how to approach her. “ mate can you do it for me?” draco asked theo. “Alright.” he sighed before he spoke. “Proffesor, I'd like Mr. Malfoy, and Ms. Yln, to be in my group.” theo raise his hand and then all the students had snapped at him, eyes were all on him, then snapes monotone voice came up. “Alright get to work.” he informed.

As the two smirking boys went to her table, she ignored them. Draco was really nervous about the plan. “So yn...” theo started, yns head snapped at him at the moment she heard her name.

“What?” said the girl, “How about we plan a study group at the astronomy tower after school?” planned theo. She looked hesitant to answer probably because the blonde was at the back of theo, staring “Why not the library?” she huffed. “b-because the lighting there is so nice!” exclaimed theo.

“if you say so...” replied the girl, Draco whispered “Mate, I don't know what are you trying to—” but he was cut off. “I'm not gonna go to the study later at the tower, so it's just you and yn. Then you could shoot your shot.” theo whispered back.

As yn came back with some ingredients, they went to work.

6pm, before dinner;

Yn was walking the hall, to go to the astronomy tower, the ghost of Hogwarts were flying around, patrolling? And she suddenly bumped into cedric Diggory, the ghost who died at the Wizarding tournament.

“Evening, yn” greeted the handsome ghost. “Evening cedric.” she greeted the ghost back with a smile and both of them parted ways.

Now she arrived the astronomy tower, stepping all the stair cases. “Evening yn.” that voice. It was dracos. “Evening malfoy.” she snarled getting a seat and began to grab her books.

“Where's nott?” she asked. “I don't know..” he lied. The atmosphere was awkward, quiet. Seconds turned into minutes. “Yn—” draco started to make a conversation. “What?!” she hissed. “Can we like.. Talk?” his voice squeaked. “about what?”.

“look, I'm sorry about what happened a few weeks ago.. I didn't know what I was doing or what I was feeling.” he looked down. He seem genuine about it, “also, I discorved days after, that I like you too, more than a friend. I really hope you can forgive me.” his grey eyes started to darken. Knowing he'd still be rejected. “Fine, but let's stay as friends first.” she finally smiled around him. Though he flinched when he said only friends, He couldn't wait to be more than friends but he had to respect her boundaries. So he nodded.

As the two pair friendship blossomed, they took care of eachother day by day, they fell more Inlove with eachother.

#draco malfoy #draco lucius malfoy #draco malfoy imagine #draco imagine #draco x reader #draco fanfiction #draco fic #draco fluff #Draco angst #Reader x draco #— {🐚} her work's !

88 notes · View notes

spockandawe · 3 years

Text

Well, this is interesting! So, in that post yesterday, there was one line that really baffled me, a thing about people brushing off a character as an asshole “because he shows literally zero growth.” I kind of set that aside because it was such a weird non-sequitur, and guessed that it was just someone’s sentences not quite keeping up with their train of thought, which has happened to me many times. Apparently I was wrong! I already spent long enough on that one post, I’m tired of talking about that, but this is new and interesting.

Okay. I kind of wanted to see if I could talk about this purely in terms of abstracts and not characters, but I don’t think it’ll work. It would be frustrating to write and confusing to read. It’s about Jiang Cheng. Right up front: This isn’t about whether or not he’s an abuser. Frankly, I don’t think it’s relevant. This also isn’t about telling people they should like him. I don't care whether anyone else likes him or not. But I do like him, and I am always fascinated by dissecting the reasons that people disagree with me. And the process of Telling Stories is my oldest hyperfixation I remember, which will become relevant in a minute.

I thought I had a good grasp on this one, you know? Jiang Cheng makes it pretty obvious why people would dislike Jiang Cheng. But then the posts I keep stumbling over were making weird points, culminating in that “literally zero growth” line.

So! What happened is that someone wrote up a post about how Jiang Cheng’s character arc isn’t an arc, it’s stagnation. It’s a pretty interesting read, and I broadly agree with the larger point! The points where I would quibble are like... the idea that it’s absolute stagnation, as opposed to very subtle shifts that still make a material difference. But still, cool! The post was also offered up as a reason why OP was uninterested in writing any more Jiang Cheng meta, which I totally get. I’m not tired of him yet, but I definitely understand why someone who isn’t a fan of his would get tired about writing about a character with a very static arc. Okay!

Now, internet forensics are hard. I desperately wish I had more information about this evolution, because I find this stuff fascinating, but I have no good way to find things said in untagged posts, reblogs, or private/external venues. But as far as I can tell, that “literally zero growth” wasn’t just a slip of the tongue, it’s become fashionable for people to say that Jiang Cheng is an abusive asshole (that it’s fucked up to like) because he doesn’t have a character arc.

Asshole? Yes. Abusive? This post still isn’t about that. This is about it being fucked up to like this character because he did bad things and had a static character arc.

At first, that point of view was still deeply confusing to me. But I think I figured out the idea at the core of it, and now I’m only baffled. I’m not super interested in confirming this directly, because the people making the most noise about this have not inspired confidence in their ability to hold a civil conversation and I’m a socially anxious binch, but I think the idea is: ‘This character did Bad Things, and then did not improve himself.’

Which is alarmingly adjacent to that old favorite standard of ‘This piece of fiction is glorifying Bad Thing.’ I haven’t seen anyone accusing mxtx of something something jiang cheng, only the people who read/watched/heard the story and became invested in the Jiang Cheng character, but things kind of add up, you know?

Like I said, I don’t want to arbitrate anyone’s right to like/dislike Jiang Cheng. That’s such a fucking waste of time. But this is fascinating to me, because it’s like..... so obviously new and sudden, with such a clear originating point. I can’t speak to the Chinese fans, obviously, but exiledrebels started translating in... what, 2017? And only now, in 2021, do people start putting forth Jiang Cheng’s flat character arc as a “reason” that he’s bad? I’m not going to argue if he pings you in the abuse place, I’m not a dick. I’m not going to argue if you just dislike his vibes. I’m just over here on my blog and in the tag enjoying myself, feel free to detour around me. But oh my god, it’s so silly to try to tell other people that they shouldn’t like him because he has a static character arc.

I want to talk about stories. I don’t know how much I’ll be able to say, because it’s impossible to make broad, sweeping statements, because there are stories about change, there are stories about lack of change, there are all kinds of media that can be used to tell stories, and standards for how stories are told and what they emphasize vary across cultures and over time. But I think that what I can say is that telling a story requires... compromise. It requires streamlining. Trying to capture all the detail of life would slow down most stories to an unbearable degree. Consider organically telling someone ‘I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich’ versus the computer science exercise of having students describe, step by step, how to make one (spread peanut butter? but you never said you opened the lid)

Hell, I’ve got an example in mdzs itself. The largely-faceless masses of the common people. If someone asks you to think about it critically like, yes, obviously these are people, living their own lives, with their own desires, sometimes suffering and dying in the wake of the novel plot. But does the story give weight to those deaths? Or does it just gloss by? Yes, it references their suffering occasionally, but it is not the focus, and it would slow the story unbearably to give equal weight to each dead person mentioned.

Does Wei Wuxian’s massacre get given the same slow, careful consideration as Su She’s, or Jin Guangyao’s? No, because taking the time to weigh our protagonist with ‘well, this one was a mother, and her youngest son had just started walking, but now he’s going to grow up without remembering her face. that one only became an adult a few months ago, he still hasn’t been on many night-hunts yet, but he finds it so rewarding to protect the common people. oh, and this one had just gotten engaged, but don’t worry, his fiancee won’t mourn him, because she died here as well.’ And continuing on that way to some large number under 3000? No! Unless your goal is to make the reader feel bad for cheering for a morally grey hero, that would be a bad authorial decision! The book doesn’t ignore the issue, it comes up, Wei Wuxian gets called out about all the deaths he’s responsible for, but that’s not the same as them being given equal emotional weight to one (1) secondary character, and I don’t love this new thing where people are pretending that’s equivalent.

When Wei Wuxian brutally kills every person at the Wen supervisory office, are you like ‘holy shit... so many grieving families D:’ or are you somewhere between vindicated satisfaction and an ‘ooh, yikes’ wince? Odds are good you’re somewhere in the satisfaction/wince camp, because that’s what the story sets you up to feel, because the story has to emphasize its priorities (priorities vary, but ‘plot’ and ‘protagonist’ are common ones, especially for a casual novel read like this)

Now, characters. If you want to write a story with a sweeping, epic scale, or if you want to tightly constrain the number of people your story is about, I guess it’s possible to give everyone involved a meaningful character arc. Now.... is it always necessary? Is it always possible? Does it always make sense? No, of course not. If you want to do that, you have to devote real estate to it, and depending on the story you want to tell, it could very possibly be a distraction from your main point, like the idea of mxtx tenderly eulogizing every single character who dies even incidentally. Lan Qiren doesn’t get a loving examination of his feelings re: his nephews and wei wuxian and political turnover in the cultivation world because it’s not relevant, and also, because his position is pretty static until right near the end of the story. Lan Xichen is arguably one of the most static characters within the book, he seems like the same nice young between Gusu and the present, right up until... just before the end of the story.

You may see where I’m heading with this.

Like, just imagine trying to demand that every important character needs to go through a major life change before the end of your book or else it didn’t count. This just in, Granny Weatherwax and Nanny Ogg go through multiple novels without experiencing radical shifts in who they are, stop liking them immediately. I do get that the idea is that Jiang Cheng was a ~bad person~ who didn’t change, but asdgfsd I thought we were over the handwringing over people being allowed to like ““bad”” fictional characters. The man isn’t even a canonical serial killer, he’s not my most problematic fave even within this novel.

And here is where it’s a little more relevant that I would quibble with that original post about Jiang Cheng’s arc. He’s consistently a mean girl, but he goes from stressed, sharp-edged teenager, to grief-stricken, almost-destroyed teen, to grim, cold young adult (and then detours into grim, cold, and grief-stricken until grief dulls with time). He does become an attentive uncle tho. He..... doesn’t experience a radical change in his sense of self, which... it’s...... not all that strange for an adult. And bam, then he DOES experience a radical change, but the needs of the plot dictate that it’s right near the end. And he’s not the focus of the story, baby, wangxian is. He has the last few lines of the story, which nicely communicate his changes to me, but also asdfafas we’re out of story. He was never the main character, it’s not surprising we don’t linger! The extras aren’t beholden to the needs of plot, but they’re also about whatever mxtx wanted to write, and I guess she didn’t feel like writing about Jiang Cheng ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

But also. Taking a step backward. Stable characters can fill a perfectly logical place in a story. Like, look at Leia Organa. I’m not saying she has no arc, but I am saying that she’s a solid point of reference as Luke is becoming a jedi and Han is adjusting his perspective. I wouldn’t call her stagnant, the vibes are wrong, but she also isn’t miserable in her sadness swamp, the way Jiang Cheng is.

Or, hell, look at tgcf. The stagnant, frozen nature of the big bad is a central feature of the story. The bwx of now is the bwx of 800 years ago is the bwx of 1500+ years ago. This is not the place for a meta on how that was bad for those around him and for him himself, but I have Thoughts about how being defeated at the end is both a thing that hurts him and relieves him. Mei Nianqing is a sympathetic character who’s also pretty darn static. Does Ling Wen have a character arc, or do we just learn more about who she already is and what her priorities always were? I’m going to cut myself off here, but a character’s delta between the beginning of a story and the end of a story is a reasonable way to judge how interesting writing character meta is, and is a very silly metric to judge their worth, and even if I guessed at what the basic logic is, for this character, I am still baffled that it’s being put forth as a real talking point.

(also, has it jumped ship to any other characters yet? have people started applying it in other fandoms as well? please let me know if this is the case, I am wildly curious)

(no, but really, if anyone is arguing that bwx is gross specifically because he had centuries to self-reflect and didn’t fix himself, i am desperate to know)

And finally. The thing I thought was most self-evident. Did I post about this sometime recently? If a non-central character experiences a life-altering paradigm shift right near the end of the story (without it being lingered over, because non-central character), oh my god. As a fic writer? IT’S FREE REAL ESTATE. This is the most fertile possible ground. If I want to write post-canon canon-compliant material, adsgasfasd that’s where I’m going to be looking. Okay, yeah, the main couple is happy, that’s good. Who isn’t happy, and what can I do about that? Happy families are all alike, while every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way, etc.

It’s not everyone’s favorite playground, but come on, these are not uncommon feelings. And frankly, it’s starting to feel a little disingenuous when people act like fan authors pick out the most blameless angel from the cast and lavish good things upon them. I’m not the only one who goes looking for a good dumpster fire and says I Live Here Now. If I write post-canon tgcf fic, it’s very likely to focus on beef and/or leaf. I have written more than one au focusing on tianlang-jun.

And, hilariously. If the problem with Jiang Cheng. Is that he is a toxic man fictional character who failed to grow on his own, and is either unsafe or unhealthy to be around. If the problem is that he did not experience a character arc. If these people would be totally fine with other people liking him, if he improved himself as a person. And then, if authors want to put in the (free! time-consuming!) work of writing that character development themselves. You would think that they would be lauded for putting the character through healthier sorts of personal growth than he experienced in canon. Instead, I am still here writing this because first, I was bothered by these authors being named as “freaks” who are obsessed with their ‘uwu precious tsundere baby’ with a “love language of violence,” and then I was graciously informed that people hate Jiang Cheng because he experiences no character growth.

#jiang cheng #mdzs #the untamed #disk horse #long post/#abuse/#only tangentially #but better safe than sorry i hope

77 notes · View notes