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bonefall · 8 months

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This is a bit of a vague, broad request (so sorry about that!) but do you have any more info on the Dappletail extended family that hasn’t made it to our ears yet? Any masterposts about them or about individual cats like Darkstripe? I loved the Cricketclaw post a lot and I’d love to see more of these complicated goobers!

Sure! But it won't be comprehensive-- I need to make them a whole post like I did for the Dragonkin family over in RiverClan.

I've been calling them Dapplekin lately, but if we zoom out a little further, I've been calling the whole family the "Tawnyrain" line. I think we could call them Rainkin for the example here.

The Rainkin family descends from Rainfur and Tawnyspots. Tawnyspots is now the FATHER of Dappletail and Thrushpelt, bringing him in line with the statement that he was an old deputy when he retired.

Tawnyspots was an old friend of Sunstar. I imagine he also had a ton of apprentices, he was a responsible and nurturing kind of guy.

Rainfur was gorgeous. She was light golden with those lighter "dapple" stripes you see in Dappletail and her kits.

She is also where the humor came from. She loved the CORNIEST jokes. For some reason I just find it very funny that every cat in BB whose prefix is "Rain" gets a sense of humor.

Tawnyspots: "Hey Rainfur!! What did the tired honeysuckle say to the oak? Leaf me alone I'm bushed!"

Rainfur: (WHEEEEEZE)

The family gets the mane from Tawnyspots.

They were just NICE people, y'know? I think Bluestar looks back at them fondly, they were like the super sweet neighbors in the apartment next to you who would bring over extra food in old, stained tupperware.

And that extended to their kids. Dappletail and Thrushpelt are extremely meaningful to Bluestar, the both of them are sweet as overripe blackberries.

Dappletail has a really BAD case of resting bitchface. I channel a bond villain when I draw her or think of her voice.

She loves telling stories and explaining things, because she is good at it.

When Ravenkit and Dustkit's mother died and their uncle was extremely sick, and she'd just lost Featherkit and Darkstripe skeddadled with Graykit, she looked after them.

I think Ravenpaw's love of storytelling comes from her. Unfortunately though, she gave him a great power, as a kid he had a bad habit of Making Shit Up.

It definitely comes from Dappletail, who never says "I don't know." She will hypothesize, speculate, and seek answers, but doesn't use idk.

"Dappletail, where is the tunnelbun?"

"I saw it last shift, Graystripe had it. He probably took it."

Her kits all actually have the same biofather. I don't know who it is though, I imagine she met him after Rosetail told her a secret story about her honor sire in Chelford, but it might be a Clan cat. But he's monochrome gray; all of her kits are the same color as him.

THRUSHPELT meanwhile, ALSO a ball of sunshine,

I wrote a joke about him saying howdy ONCE and it became a core memory. Guy who says howdy.

Thistleclaw: "THIS IS ENGLAND WHY ARE YOU SAYING HOWDYYYY"

"Well howdy doody thistleclaw"

"AUUUGH"

He definitely says Hello in some weird way. Guy who answers the phone with Yellow. Man who says shucks unironically

And then surprises you by being one of ThunderClan's strongest fighters. If you swear in his good Christian Minecraft server he'll fucking gut you

Dappletail is not the stronger twin. Thushpelt is as thick as a twig but you get in a fight with him and you hear Dark Souls

That's part of why Bluestar could never allow ThunderClan to get taken over by Thistleclaw. The strongest fighter... goes on the front lines.

Moonflower was the strongest fighter too, once.

Unlike Dappletail, Thrushpelt also never needed to know the full story. Bluemoon ADORED him. If she was ever about to overshare for his sake, with the thought that he deserved to know, he would stop her.

"If I should know it, I will learn it in StarClan."

When Bluestar picked her first deputy, she knew it had to be him.

And he was a fantastic deputy, and a great uncle. Super supportive guy, calls you Sport and ruffles your mullet.

He got taken out a few weeks after Featherkit, which was devastating to Dappletail. She is comforted, however, by the idea that Thrushpelt can look after her.

I got into Cricketclaw and Darkstripe recently so I'll try not to repeat too much

Cricket and Dapple were actually extremely upset that Graystripe halted the fight over his kits.

Cricketclaw especially, she doesn't give a shit about Crookedstar and his sadness, she would have invited him to Cry About It, "MY nespring"

Dapple is 50% more diplomatic; "Silverstream is gone. Stormkit and Featherkit's family is here."

Feathertail's name makes them both Emotional, she actually has a tail pattern a lot like Dappletail's

On that note, yeah. They both did not want Featherpaw and Stormpaw to go back. They were both actually pretty upset about it

Cricketclaw got in a FIGHT with Mistyfoot for saying they could go home

How dare you even SUGGEST that actually, go back to the Clan that WANTED TO EXECUTE THEM???

I don't think Cricket could compose herself enough to say goodbye, and she was FURIOUS at Featherpaw for taking the offer. Her final words to them was probably just at Stormpaw alone;

"Don't let your sister decide your whole life for you. You'll always be OUR family."

I don't think Stormpaw actually appreciated it much. Stop making this harder! I know this is a bad idea! I have to be there for Featherpaw when this shit all goes south, god damn it!!

Dappletail and Graystripe are sad but supportive of the twins' choice. Cricketclaw is maaaad

And Stormfur and Feathertail... man

Feathertail sees the good in everything, to a fault. She believes it will all work out if we stick together, and that everything that happens is meant to be.

Stormfur does not agree

He watched his whole ass mentor get wasted, PARTIALLY by his uncle.

He saw people he thought where his friends watch his execution, some curious, some cheerful. All of them just watching.

People don't die clean. His blood didn't anoint the earth, it just gushed and choked. There's no such thing as a noble murder

Everyone rejects the Dishonor Title they gave Stonefur, saying that Tigerstar was not ordained by StarClan.

Stormfur doesn't see how that matters. The stars watched, too.

It was Deerfoot, Swansong, Jaggedtooth, Wetfoot, Mosspelt, and others who saved him... and it was normal cats, just like them, who built the Bonehill

So again; what does it matter that Tigerstar wasn't given the authority by StarClan to change his name?

His mentor was named Heartworm. And that is the only angel he prays to.

If they hadn't gone back to RiverClan, Feathertail never would have been chosen for the journey. Never would have died.

And the destruction of the Forest killed his family in ThunderClan. Devastated them. Even Graystripe was taken.

So when Leopardstar nodded at the "sign" Mothwing claimed she saw, when RiverClan hardened in TNP, and when it kicked out the pawful of Tribe cats who had come to help these ingrates get set up in a new territory...

He was done with Clan Culture. There was nothing left here, for him.

I don't even plan for him to be in love with Brook yet, going to the Tribe was about getting the fuck away from all this.

Yes Feathertail's grave is there too, but I think his feelings are super complicated.

Cricketclaw was right, he let her decide his life, and because of her he didn't get to say goodbye to his family. He would have been in ThunderClan, maybe even been able to save some of them.

At the Tribe, he lives in the Cave Ward. The least populated ward, and practically a temple-town.

At first he thought he would be more of a hunter, but he quickly learned he really doesn't like how you hunt in the highlands. It's a VERY leggy activity, lots of hiking, running, coordination. It was different than he expected.

Anyway I'll stop there because I could write an SE on how Stormfur adjusts after his immigration and I would actually be interested in doing it. Like, really take the chance to show how the BB!Tribe works and explore the feelings of moving to a new place.

It's a theme that's personal to me as a writer tbh.

Graystripe meanwhile... he never gets over Silverstream. Not even with Millie. I don't think he realizes it, but he really is always looking for the glimpse of himself in a happier timeline

And boy oh boy does it fuck up his next litter.

I've spoken about them all before and I plan to collect it all in one place at some point, but briefly,

Graystripe can't ever take a side when Millie treats Briarlight poorly, and just ends up enabling Millie's ableism

Millie is frantic over Briarpaw's injury, and says some AWFUL things right to her face, making the entire situation about herself

But Graystripe will be like, "your mother says things she doesn't mean :( she loves you, you know"

He can't deal with the possibility of losing Millie, too. Or any of his kids. It's something that Briarlight and Blossomfall come to realize, with time and wisdom.

Bumblestripe meanwhile... he's not really smart enough to ever realize that. He just keeps breaking himself on trying to get Graystripe to see him

But Gray is ALWAYS seeing his first litter, and comparing them. No milestone goes by where he's not cheerfully bringing up some story of how their older siblings were, how he wishes they could see them.

That's where he goes, in the end. After extreme carnage from the Impostor, Graystripe decided that he wanted to spend the last of his life with Stormfur in the mountain.

(Graystripe's Vow is now Ferncloud's Parting, FERNCLOUD is gonna go confront her brother)

Thankfully, Briarlight had her mentor Honeysnake to help her realize her worth... but Blossomfall and Bumblestripe meander for meaning into really toxic, dangerous places for their whole lives.

Blossomfall trains in the Dark Forest because she feels so alienated and disconnected from the Clan at large, only stopping in the BOTTE in the last wave when she faces up against Briarlight

She confronts Briar, and she just... cocks her eyebrow. "ILL END YOU" "no you won't."

Squirrelflight actually tried to tell Bramblestar to make an exception with his Dishonor Titles for the DF trainees, realizing that that Blossomfall's problem was alienation.

She wanted Blossomfall to be put into a Secondary Apprenticeship, specifically for the Construction Patrol since Dustpelt was killed. Something where she'd see her work pay off, and she'd be helping to take care of the Clan.

But Bramblestar rejected it, because it would be unfair. If everyone else is getting Dishonor Titles she will get one too; she shouldn't be REWARDED for what she did. It's a punishment.

So she was Shredbloom for a while. None of her problems were addressed and she ended up joining The Kin later, eventually being rescued by Heathertail and her plan.

Returning to ThunderClan was on her family's vouch, bringing the kits she'd given birth to in The Kin with her, and she was on THIN ICE

She mouthed off at the Impostor in typical Blossomfall fashion once, early in his reign, and she got hit with a DEVASTATING second Dishonor Title; Clearface.

"Because it would be better off if we could see right through her."

Bumblestripe became one of the Impostor's favorite lackeys, exploiting his failed relationship and resentment of Dovewing

Briarlight was murdered in the dog attack that Sparkpelt barely survived, and Stemleaf is killed in the assassination attempt on the Impostor.

Bumblestripe accompanies the old people, Ferncloud, Cloudtail, and Graystripe, during Ferncloud's Parting. He says goodbye to his dad in the mountain, and finally meets the Famous Stormfur...

And learns that he's just some fucking guy.

You live your whole life trying to hold up to this standard of a distant, unknown brother in the mountains, and then you learn he was Just A Dude all along.

He went further south with Cloudtail and Ferncloud too, to make sure they were safe. They are old and it is a long journey.

And that's where they all are to the current point of BB! In ThunderClan, the active Rainkin Family is Bumblestripe, Blossomfall, Plumstone, and Shellfur, and all of them want to support Spotfur as she raises Stemleaf's children.

They refer to themselves as "Graykin" currently; their last relevant ancestor. In Clan Culture, families tend to split at a grandparent or great-grandparent.

#Rainkin #Dapplekin #Graykin #Better bones au

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cyberneticlagomorph · 3 months

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((How was the "the camarilla but catholic and worse" founded? Were they different from how they are today? If so, was there any particular event that changed them?))

god ok this has been sitting in my inbox for days but i didn't forget about it i prommy.

Ok so, "the camarilla but catholic and worse" is the fun ooc definition of the Knights of the Ivory Tower (formally the Knights of Malta in older iterations of the universe), but i'm still work-shopping that name for them idk.

The Knights started out as like this aberrant faction of the Round Table who later split off from the main group after some sort of Schism and took Excalibur with them. Mind you this was way back when before the magical and mundane halves of the world were split apart forever and shit like The Veil (web of secrets and lies that keep magic hidden from the general population) was invented, so this was a time of dragons and fairies actively stealing babies and whatnot.

That original First Knight (some say it was a knight of Arthurian legend, some say it was straight up Saint George, or even the biblical Adam come back to save mankind from Something. Nobody is exactly sure who that guy was, I know I'm not and I'm the one making this shit up) saw the sinful and hedonistic ways of magic and pledged to cleanse the world of it or at least keep humanity safe from it in some way shape or form, so he gathered a bunch of like minded individuals and went to work.

What happened shortly after the first group of Knights was formed was basically a war against magical creatures that culminated in the near extinction of many magical species, including dragons.

How this war ended is largely up for debate, some claim that the Knights won outright and forced all the magical creatures to sign a contract (i'm talking like Ursula "sign away a part of you" faustian type bullshit Contract) that forced them all to Behave the way the humans wanted (ie no stealing babies, poisoning wells, kidnapping princesses etc), others say that the fae were actually winning and the Knights tricked them into signing it, but that Contract was still signed no matter what and it became known as the Dictates of Preservation.

These Dictates were a set of laws that prohibited certain kinds of magic outright, like love potions or the ritual required to make a changeling child. Those Dictates are still in place today and are largely why Fae in Jack's timeline are relatively toothless compared to their ancestors.

ANYWAY.

The Knights then appointed themselves protectors of humanity, they invented the Veil and enforce it very fiercely.

Their organization has grown from a plucky band of medieval Knights, to like the shadowy hand of the fucking Vatican in some places. Their base of operations is a secluded pocket dimension only accessible by the Knights, their guests, and creatures with a flagrant disregard for those rules (ie Jack who can go p much anywhere he wants within his own universe). Yes it's a literal tower, it's caked in dragon ivory from those bloody centuries worth of hunts, each piece carved with the name of the Knight who murdered the dragon it came from and the date the deed was done.

They've grown with the times in terms of technology and medicine and arms, but they're still extremely catholic so they have monks and nuns and clerics as part of their group now with the nuns raising the children they get from Places.

One of the tenants of real chivalry is charity, and children's homes count as charities right? Where else to get fresh new recruits if your existing followers aren't breeding fast enough.

There's like, untold of levels to how seedy and dangerous this shit gets, the Knights have gotten their hands on numerous SCP level anomalies that they keep locked away or use as tools or propaganda to further their agendas.

Like Excalibur, who is always bonded to and wielded by the current head of their organization. Or Noah's ark, which they use for artifact storage. The christian themed anomalies are classed as "holy relics" while stuff like the Promethean Flame is an "arcane artifact"

It's just A Whole Lot

#ooc #ask games #ask to tag #religious imagery #religion #lore dump #loredump

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acheronist · 8 months

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ok here's my player fansign event gossip

🐙

i was running a teensy bit late so i didn't get to say hi to rasmussen but he did look VERY handsome and looked a bit afraid LMAO. my sweet moose was probably out of his depth.. socially awkward darling

debrincat came out second and he was so so so so kind to fans. he was taking a ton of time to stop and sign something for EVERYONE who wanted something signed. about 8 or 9 guys passed him and went inside before he was nearly done walking thru the crowd to sign stuff... :'-) welcome home kitty we love u + it was so nice to see him recognize how excited we are for him too rahhh

i honestly dont remember seeing andrew copp at all but he must have walked by lol

berggren was sooo 🤏🏻🤏🏻 and cute and polite. he signed things very neatly and small and carefully (literally just JB48 in like a 1" square. its ok baby u can take up more space) + we congratulated him on getting called up again because we all love to see him skate and he seemed really genuinely surprised/pleased to hear it

it seemed like ville was bouncing back and forth between both sides of the walk a ton... also just trying to sign everything for everyone who wanted it... he was so 🙂 shaped though.. and he really is pale as fuck i think my guy was refracting sunlight as he walked by. i liked his signature a lot though it was very tight + angular + neatly written. big emphasis on the double Ls in his name. I dont even remember if he spoke though i'll be real.

ben chiarot looked sharp as FUCK. he had a turtleneck on under his suit jacket and his hair all slicked back..... he was serving sexy team dilf without children realness. so my bestie asked him if he just got done at a GQ model shoot while he was signing her shirt and he smirked and laughed under his breath a bit. whore <3

fischer was really fun to look at irl. his face is crazy i want 2 draw him. thats all i got LMAO. i dont remember anything else sorry to the christian fischer stans of tumblr dot com

compher was very polite too but he was moving thru the crowd really quick.. again i think he was just awkward and a little out of his depth w the crowd in the same way ras was? but he was very polite + nice + softspoken tho and i took a selfie w him for @comphy-and-cozy because she's violently in love with him but couldn't be there LOL

ghost looked SAUR sexy.. dark green suit well tailored very kind and polite.. i like that boy ! he was really softspoken too which surprised me because he's been such a freaky bitch on the ice lately

i also dont remember sprong at all but i do remember thinking it was kind of a #serve to match the toque to be the same burgundy color as his suit (also extremely well tailored. everyone looked very handsome). creative ways to make early male pattern baldness be kind of cunty + well dressed for the weather.

DYLAN.... DYYLAAANNNNNNNNNN

he was so so lovely.. definitely doing the same move as debrincat where he was just taking his damn time to sign smth for everyone who wanted smth. he was kind of in Good Captain Autopilot Mode it really reminded me of clips of stevie from the 90s... hockeytown loves our captains so much its unreal. but he signed my jersey and said hi to our little group and i sooo shaky lmao. but i handed him the art & he started to sign the plastic sleeve it was in? and I went no it's for you! and he kind of checked back into real life and went oh OH!!!!! and smiled when he actually looked at it and carried it w him thru the rest of the line :'-) idk i feel like he must get a lot of gifts from fans? but he definitely looked at it inside the doors of the LCA and he definitely carried it w him and didn't throw it away immediately so. big win for people who are me.

lucas and mo were funny asf they made it about 75% of the way thru the line and then the sun came out and was in their eyes and they both said ok i'm done now thank u and left. #respect

joey was so cute.. my bestie made a sign calling him a himbo last year and (then) he asked what a himbo was so we said Lmao google it, and this year he was signing stuff and talking to us and we were like "did you ever google what a himbo was" and he went huh. ohhh yeah lol like he was somehow both Pleased and Very embarrassed about it . cutesie.

newsy came out too!! and his daughter was with him and it was so cute they had matching friendship bracelets and newsy was like (to us the crowd) omg guys can we take a selfie ? can we do that?? and we were like Dawg you're head coach you can do anything you want..... so we all got a selfie w him LMAOOOO and he was so sweet and gently spoken and kind to fans. which still is crazy. i get whiplash every time how different he is to blash (the old coach who was a bitch and looked like he wanted to call people slurs but knew better) its unreallll

i think all the interviews where walman's said how much he likes detroit + feels wanted here weren't lies or exaggerations at all.... he stuck around so long to sign things for everyone (like dylan and debrincat did) and I think he was the last guy on the walk? and he was so funny and smiley and happy to be there.. my fucking GUY!!!!

#drw #also everyone was walked out alongside younger kids who play for the little caesars team and that was so cool too #esp because there were so many ~10 y/o girls who looked like they could kick your ass just hanging out w nhlers as they walked

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merrycrisis-if · 11 months

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reading the Qiu reunion while listening to a playlist with "Break my Heart Again" by FINNEAS was a risk I took and boy did it not pay off 🫠

I had barely recovered from hitting the bridge:

"So don't pretend that I'm the instigator You were the one, but you're born to say goodbye Kissed me half a decade later That same perfume, those same sad eyes"

as Qiu arrived to the party and then you hit me with

"You can see [them] wonder how much to ask for, and you find yourself wondering how much to give."

a few screens later and as cheesy as it sounds I genuinely needed to just stop and take a couple minutes to process the feelings it all brought up, especially as someone who lost a super important person in my life because I was a 'bad influence' (read: queer and helping her as she came to discover and accept she was as well despite an uber conservative christian upbringing).

And on that note if I could just ramble for a bit - Between Merry Crisis and CT:OS, I'm realizing that what I appreciate most about your writing is how real it feels. Like, in the niche of interactive fiction where most works are at least somewhat heightened, whether its the MC being a Chosen One, the setting being a heightened version of reality or outright fantasy, your writing is so grounded in reality that it almost feels biographical by comparison - and I mean that as a compliment I promise! It's just so real and relatable it feels almost nostalgic rather than escapist, which is something I think a *lot* of realistic fiction writers try to do, but so few can actually pull off in a way that feels genuine like yours do. Where most IF's leave me imagining what my MC's and their supporting casts would be up to after the final scene, yours always seem to leave me reflecting on my own past with how relatable your characters' experiences are.

Anyway idk if that actually makes any sense but thank you so much for the incredible update and I cannot wait for more <3

I am so AMAZED by the idea of you listening to that song while playing the update! Those lines are absolutely PERFECTLY IN SYNC. Crazy. I can only imagine how awesome that experience must've been!

Please keep telling me all the songs that you guys listen to as accompaniment to Merry Crisis, because it's so INTERESTING to know you guys' soundscapes/soundtracks to the game.

I'm sorry you had that experience of losing that really important person to you, and yes, it sounds a lot like what happened between Qiu and MC. It's so tough to be ditched by someone with an ultra conservative upbringing, but it also sucks to have gone through that kind of upbringing. If you're reading this and you belong to either of your groups, you have my love!!

And finally, thank you so much for your praise regarding Merry Crisis and CT:OS! It's really cool that you think they're both relatable and thought-provoking. I love that the IFs make you reflect on your own experiences. I do hope to reach a point in the writing that sparks readers to imagine what MC and the cast of characters get up to together off-screen as well though! :D

Sending you so many hugs.

#merry crisis #if #interactive fiction #asks

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rinadragomir · 2 years

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1 episode reaction

They try SO HARD to make it look like Bridgerton is it even legal?😑 1) they stole queen's personality 2) unnecessary sex scene in the beginning with characters we don't even know yet. Actually the whole introduction scene was much worse than the actual episode. Idk why they fucked up the first impression this much ;-;

I actually enjoy looking at guardians, they're the best part of the episode🌝

Mikhail and Sonya, my babies, my cottagecore parents, most beautiful people in this show, god bless your acting 🙏🏻

The main problems: 1) songs that don't fit any scene they're used in. Where they even found those cheap 2009 "cool party" tracks? 2) poorly written dialogues as characters introduction. They try TOO HARD to make us understand who is who in that 2007 fanfiction style. That girl is a kind princess so she compliments everyone, that girl is a cool tomboy so she wears boots under the dress, that guy is a bad boy✨ so he FUCKS 😱etc

Good thing they focused on Lissa/Rose friendship! Love these two

Dimitri is fine😌 I approve, the acting in 100% my Дима ✨yes I'm still not over him not being Russian but ugh we got what we got(

I really like the first Lissa/Christian dialogue, but don't you think they went too early with all of that "sTaY wItH mE"? Let them just tease each other from afar idk?😐

Dimitri/Rose interactions 🌝 yummy yummy ima eat

Okay thank God they didn't pretend Lissa's mental problems don't exist. It's a huge part of the books, so I'm glad it's here

Wait how does this "sun kills vampires" even work here? One scene - Lissa is burning alive, next scene - she's perfectly fine riding a bike in the middle of the day, hiding under a translucent umbrella?.....

I actually find it interesting Lissa and Rose only finding out they're connected in the show. Not a bad change, not at all

Dimitri you little bitch don't look at us like that, it was your job to make sure we're safe, shoo shoo, go and do that hot shit u usually do on the roof 😤

" I think unicorn in moroi is Lissa" I—

Wtf no really what the fuck?.. rip funny book Christian, you won't be forgotten😔🪦🙏🏻

Hey they added Janine's mad note! I'm glad)😌

Rose/Mason out of nowhere romance... Hm listen I'm not some mad Romitri shipper that can't accept other options (I mean I AM but hush!), but where it came from? They gave us such nice "school friends" dynamic and then ruined it in 5 seconds.

Same for Lissa/Christian. I'm ready for all the ships, just give me some time to start asking for it myself. They don't tease us with interesting dialogues or interactions, they just say "these two are in love👍". Great but where? It would be better if we got Rose/Mason kiss in maybe episode 4. But this is just way too fast for me, not awful, just fast

"Lissa keeps my heart in a right place" 🥹🥺

So since Lissa can be a queen without any family members.... No Jill?🥺 Like she's not important for the plot anymore, so... No Jill🥺 they left Eddie without his Jill🥺

For the first episode: 6/10

#ima watch 2 episode!#va #vampire academy #vampire academy spoilers #vampire academy tv show #peacock #rose hathaway #lissa dragomir #dimitri belikov #christian ozera

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thevagueambition · 8 months

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4, 9, and 27 for the Historical Asks game?:D

4: Favourite historical era

Gah, man, this is difficult! Very broadly speaking, I guess the from the 1780s to 1920s is where a lot of my interest and knowledge lies, but that's not super specific, lol!

I also enjoy really ancient stuff, I just don't know that much about it. Like both classical antiquiety but also the iron age of MENA and the eastern mediterranean.

I feel like what attracts me is either very old stuff that harkens back to like... "how did some of these concepts work in such different circumstances, how were certain ideas formed by certain civilisations" or it's more recent stuff where it provides context for how we arrived at the current state of affairs.

If I had to choose something more concrete, maybe 1900-1920s? idk

9: Favourite historical film

So I already answered this, but in addition to 1917 and Portrait of a Lady on Fire, I also really like the movie Joyeux Noel about the Christmas truce of WW1.

I'd also like to use the opportunity to talk about an upcoming Danish movie about the Danish West Indies (the current US Virgin Islands) called Viften.

From IMDB:

"St. Croix, the Danish West Indies, 1848. Anna and Petrine are close friends. Both are women of color, but Anna is free and owns her housekeeper, the enslaved Petrine. Things are seemingly fine until rumors of a rebellion begin to swirl."

I wasn't able to find a trailer with English subs, but according to IMDB, the English title is "Empire".

(CW for racist imagery, both slavery related and eugenics related)

youtube

The original title means "The [hand] fan" and is a reference to the practice of using an enslaved child holding a hand fan as a ceiling fan.

The film is written by the same woman who plays the main character and based on an interview on the radio, the character she plays is a mixed race woman who attained as much power as a woman of colour was able to in that time and place and the movie does a lot with how that positions her both in relation to white people and in relation to the slaves she own.

The tone seems to be darkly satirical and very deliberately resistant to the sort of "one good white guy who's horrified by the evils of colonialism and puts things right" sort of narrative that a lot of Danish media tends to prefer to use when dicussing this period (when it does so at all).

(EDIT: apparently, it came out in spring and I just forgot to go see it, lol! I'll watch it as soon as I'm able).

27: Favourite historical “ What if… ” ?

I think what I find interesting in this regard is mixing and matching different types of societal structures, technological levels and religions. What if Christianity hadn't become dominant in Europe? What if absolute monarchies were still the norm with our current level of technological development? That sort of thing.

I usually don't like steampunk, but there are a few versions of steampunk that sort of get at that in a way I find interesting.

The specific example of a historical "what if" I like the best is the anime Ōoku (it's a manga originally, but I haven't read it) wherein a plague that kills something like 3/4ths of all men and boys results in well-considered societal changes to gender roles and gendered labour. It's not just a lazy "what if reverse genders" but an actually intelligent engagement with the situation it sets up.

The "what if" in Ōoku is similar to the other ones I posited in that it's essentially about "what if culture and society had taken a different turn at some point from what it did in reality? How would things be different -- and how would they be the same?"

___

Thanks for asking! Hope you enjoy the longwinded answers XD

#ask

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ace-the-fox · 1 year

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Oohhh mama I've got the Adam Murray fankid (Cain) on the brain again. Have some thoughts (he's still a massive WIP that is trying to go along with whatever the canon decks at my face next, but here's the recents):

Okay, so, he IS now Evelin's kid too. Idk, it's symbolic and shit, and makes the most sense. They are the only couple in the series among the main characters, I believe, so...

This one's my fave. Making his parents pretty heavy duty Christians. But not like Carrie Christians, and more "We asked God to give us the perfect child and then we adopted you... What do you mean you want to be a boy, that isn't God's way??" Yeah, that. So, obviously having his Biblical knowledge, hating his parents, and not knowing what name to go by, he slaps on Cain for the time being. It's just to piss off his parents by naming himself after a murderer from the bible, because hey he's not getting it permanently, legally changed or anything. Though, he does turn out to really, really like it, unfortunately for his folks. (Also the fact that Cain killed Abel, his brother, and his deadname, Annabelle, has Abel basically in the middle... 👀 layersssss-)

He's basically the type of guy who would literally cry over spilled milk but then go through the most traumatising event known to man and just go "well, that sure was... a day."

I've also given him friends!! (Even though, with the way tmc seems to be going, the alternates might as well kill off all humanity by 2023, when this takes place, BUT–) I haven't thought of names. I considered biblical ones, but I'm not sure about finding ones that really fit deeper than just being from the good ol' bibble. One of them is your typical basic blonde white girl (who, admittedly, kind of starts off as one of those annoying allies. "I want a gay best friend!!" type of thing), the other one's a chubby video game nerd. They're an odd bunch, who somehow bonded over a shared chemistry project :)

This may change with the tmc plot or other stuff, but rn I've decided what makes the most sense is that Cain isn't technically an alternate and is actually just some guy. However, he is immune to alternates, as they can sense SOMETHING off about his vibes.

Mention of (entirely SFW) mpreg under the cut (I mean, any thing I do for any fandom ever is nearly guaranteed to include it, and I apologise for that but it will happen again lol). Don't tap if it ain't your thing.

(I may or may not have started a oneshot based on the latter half of this idea lol...)

So, he was originally starting to develop before Catalyst came out, and I got the whole "he was found in a rubbish bin off the street" thing from a Jacqueline Wilson book I never even read (sue me, okay 💀). But, no, recently I had a better idea: lil Cain was born DURING Catalyst. Essentially, Adam had no idea he was pregnant, his alt transformation triggered labour, he was already in so much pain from said transformation the labour also went completely missed, baby comes out, Adam has no idea what to think or feel. And, this all kinda depends on what Alex is gonna do next, but main idea for now is Adam gives bby to Thatcher and tells him to make sure he's (well, he'd say she because Cain was literally a newborn, but I'll say he because I feel that's right? Idk trans people can confirm or otherwise on that lol) cared for. Thatcher takes him to the hospital where he can be looked over and given to a new family (,:

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pinkpaganofficial-blog · 6 years

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Content and trigger warnings for:

- eating disorder[s] (eds), i.e anorexia, bulimia

- me talking about my suicidal thoughts and venting (I'm ok i just need to like... "word vomit" i guess)

- abandonment by friends

- feeling repression

~~~\\

So i doubt most people on here who follow me know that I suffer from mental illness but I do and have for a very long time. All of the symptoms and effects really came out after my grandfather/best friend passed away when I was 11, 12 years ago. I fell into a hole of depression, anxiety, and disordered eating. From the time I was 11 until I was around 14 I had a very hard time with food. I was suffering from bulimia and I would do the routine binges and purges I had set for myself through the day. I'm surprised my teeth survived all of the stomich acid assaults on them honestly.

I was lonely. I felt so fucking alone in the world. I didn't have many friends. The friends I had were pretty fairweather at the time, as we were kids. They'd hop to the coolest person in their opinions on sight and leave me in the dust, and then come back when they were done, or something happened, whatever. It wasn't stable, and I was always afraid of just being deserted again. My friend who stuck with me, my grandfather, was gone. My grandmother was so in shambles that she doesnt even remember the year after he died at all. My mother is chronically ill, and even though she is and will always be there for me as long as is possible I just couldn't tell her how bad I was feeling. Maybe it was guilt because she has problems that I felt far outweighed mine (haha oh god there's the tears that actually stings).

And my dad is... well.. a dad. Sometimes dads just don't understand things like mental illness, or being an unwell person. My dad loves me. I know that, and I love him a lot too. But he can't understand how these things affect me as he's basically neurotypical in every way. He tries. But I can't find empathy there, and a lot of the time there's misunderstanding when we talk about mental illness. So I didn't tell him anything then either.

I would stay in my room a lot, or be out in the woods a lot. I would scratch up my arms with my nails until they would bleed and I would cry. I felt like I didn't care if I died at that time. My parents raised me religiously in the church and I tried very hard to have a relationship with their concept of a god. But I couldn't because to me in was just emptiness. For me, in that sense, there is nothing there. So my loneliness was running even deeper than just the physical. It was spiritual as well. And idk if anyone reading this has experienced spiritual emptiness, or even is a spiritual person, but please believe me when I say it's Hell.

When I was 14 I rode my bicycle out to a bridge near my home out in the back woods type country. The old train bridge kind with the big cement blocks at the bottom of the pillars holding them up. I remember sitting on the very edge of it just looking down at the cement. I really wanted to jump. Honestly the only reason I didn't was because of my mom. She's the reason I stepped back, got on my bicycle and rode home. Albeit I was crying the whole way home, stayed out in the garden to finish crying, washed my face in the creek and went inside and straight upstairs to my bed and I slept until the next day.

When I was around the end of being 14 I tried repression. I started trying eating normally (which has wrecked me internally, I have major digestive problems as I've always refused to go to a rehab centre, which in itself is not good for me). I started pretending to have a relationship with "God". I tried the whole "cool hip Christian kid" spin from when I was that age until 17 or so. I pushed back my depression, my fears and anxieties and eds to see if I could be happy. And I pretended to be happy for a while. And I fooled a lot of people.

Things weren't by any means okay though. My school work was suffering as it always had, but since the work was harder it was also suffering harder. I picked up smoking cigarettes. I also picked up alcohol more and more. I dated a 21 year old and lost my virginity to him at 16, after much coaxing from him. That was an extremely bad 8 months.

My saving grace and my recharge at the time was a Bible camp I'd attend in the summers. I went for 12 years. Now that I think about it.. that camp was my only constant thing for a very long time. It was always there. And even when it wasn't camp time, the place was so close I could just go talk to the live in managers when I had questions. While my relationship with a god I don't believe in was strained and a facade, the people I met are amazing and have helped me a lot.

In fact, at that camp I spilled a lot of my struggles to my group of close friends. We were just a few girls, only 17 or so. But they had all been through things just as bad as me. Some so close it scared me. I felt accepted by those girls who are now beautiful strong women. So I opened the flood gates of what I had been through. All of my dark times and feelings, thoughts of dying and plans to do it, the bulimia and how it hurt my body, my 21 year old ex and what had happened to me, my struggles in school, my guilt towards my mother as her pregnancy with me put her in her wheelchair, my panic attacks and the anxiety that I'd felt for so long, my loneliness and my desperate want to not be alive. Basically just like, ALL of it. I don't really think that was a gate I could've closed even if I tried at that point. It was just a lot.

It took a while to talk about everything, and by the time I'd covered everything even more young folks like us had come over to sit. I was sobbing. My friends weren't very far behind either. Someone was rubbing my back and another person brought me tissues. I finished and everyone was kinda quiet and sad. One of my friends said "Hey can we all just kinda sit together and pray?" and I said that I thought that was a good idea. So we sat. And we just prayed. Even if they were words floating up to an empty space where I see no god, the solidarity that I felt with my friends and those around showing that they cared about me was overwhelming. I wasn't alone. I had friends. REAL friends who weren't looking for the next best thing. And I didn't feel as empty anymore. Knowing that I had people who genuinely cared for me and everything I'd been through and everything I was made me feel so much more worthy of living, it showed me I wasn't nothing.

A lot has happened since those dark times. I've had other dark times. Anorexia claimed me at 18 as a sufferer, and I still struggle with it to this day. I had a physically and emotionally abusive sociopathic partner in the Autumn of my 21st year. I had a whole 2 year ordeal with someone that I'm not even going to talk about, as this person and I have BOTH put it behind us and forgiven each other and are now friends. I alsp dropped out of high school in grade 11.

But I've had a LOT of light times. I started actively loving my body at 21, which was the first new constant in my life. I took action and got a breast reduction from G to C cup for my health at 18. I left the church and started understanding science better. The spiritualist in me called for more, so I delved into research on Paganism and Wicca. What I found was what I needed. It was the second new constant I needed. So now instead of 1, I had 2.

I live with my fiance now. He's someone who I was schoolmates with in highschool. After a few years of not keeping in touch, we hung out. We got close again. And after a few years we started dating. We've had bumpy patches. 1 break up due to his mental illness (again, it rears its ugly head). But that was short lived. And we are actively improving ourselves while being there for one another. Last March I asked him to marry me to which he said "Well, I was gonna ask you when we got our own place, so obviously yes." (I've dated a lot of people, so I am so happy that it was him I'm going to be with, no offense to any of the guys, girls and other folks I've been with and am friends with). He's my third constant.

I have so much more now than I ever dreamed I could in those dark times, friends.

Moral of the story is:

Friends come and go. But you'll find someone, or multiple people who will care about you enough to stick with you as much as you wanna stick with them.

Don't give up on yourself. You're gonna have a lot of bad times. Life happens and we can't do shit about it. But life also has a lot of really good times worth looking forward to and holding close to heart. You can love yourself no matter who you are or what you look like because you're more than a name or a number on a scale. You're a complex person with real feelings who is worthy of self love. And love from others too.

Pain sucks. Life can suck a whole fucking lot. So much you want it to end. But through all the struggle, the hurt and the mental illness, you still very much deserve a good life. If not more, because you're actively trying to enjoy being alive in a very hard time.

So yeah. Thanks for reading this. I just needed to talk. I felt like I was going to explode and my Instagram isn't really the place to put this.

Take care of yourselfs. Cherish yourself and your time here. Make the best of your situations as much as you can. Hold your loved ones close in mind and heart. And don't be afraid to talk.

#anorexia recovery #bulimia recovery #self love #feels #rant #feelings #depression #anorexia #my past #struggle #victory #pinky

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acecatholic · 7 years

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hey! how did you guys figure out (for lack of better phrasing?) that you were ace? (idk if you've already written abt this, i'm new to your blog) also it's really cool to find christians who support the lgbt+ community :) thanks!!

Hey! I’m gonna answer for me (Mod Theo) and let the other mods add on when they have the time.

It actually took me a fairly long time to realize that I was ace, I don’t think I had heard the term until i was 17, and didn’t actually start fully identifying and using the term aro-ace to describe myself until i was about 19 (im 20 now). I actually found out about it on tumblr, when someone had reblogged a post with the definition of autochorisexualism (which i wont get into here) and it talked about asexuality and aromanticism, and something about it really resonated with me. So I started researching and researching, and watching every coming out video I could find to see if something would click, and eventually I just found the I related most to the experiences of asexuality.

I think it was weird for me cause I never really realized that there was a word for it, or that those kind of experiences existed, especially growing up in a catholic/asian household where sex isn’t a topic that’s openly discussed and is fairly discouraged outside of marriage. Which is a huge part of the reason I want to promote the representation of asexuality and aromanticism, so that more people can hear about it, and (hopefully) won’t feel so lost about why their sexuality doesn’t seem to fit in any of the boxes we’re give.

But yeah, for me it was a long process, and that mainly came out of one post on the internet!

-Mod Theo

This is Mod Ray. I grew up in an environment where I was always told to reserve sex for marriage. I thought that was easy enough, and I didn’t know why they made it seem like it was a hard thing to do. If you didn’t want the risk of contracting STDs, just don’t have sex (until you’re married). If you didn’t want the risk of pregnancy, just don’t have sex. You know, all that stuff. To me, it made sense. I didn’t understand what was so hard about waiting.

A few days before my 16th birthday, I came across the term ‘asexual’. It kinda made sense for me, but I didn’t think much about it. A few months later, during lunch, one of my school friends asked if I was asexual because my friends were talking about kissing and the idea made me feel queasy. Thinking back, I realize that not liking to kiss doesn’t necessarily mean that I’m asexual. But maybe it was a stereotype that my friends had. Anyway, I did some research on asexuality, and realized it fit me perfectly. Reading the stories and experiences of other asexuals felt as if I were reading about myself. I now understood why I thought not having sex was easy. From then on, I’ve been identifying as ace.

I figured out my aromantic identity a few months later, but I won’t go into that. You’re welcome to ask me about it on my personal blog.

So yeah, that’s how I figured it out. Mostly because of a series of events that led me to claiming the ace label for myself.

- Ray

I realized I was asexual during my homecoming dance freshman year. I hated my school and wanted to do whatever I could to go against their philosophy. So, the night of homecoming, I hooked up with a guy in a car in the school parking lot. I did it out of spite and as a way of saying screw you to the school. I wasn’t attracted to the guy sexually.

Later that year, everyone around me was having sex and I didn’t understand what they felt that I didn’t. I later found the term asexual and thought it fit. I was super confused about sexual attraction because I didn’t know that it was a real thing that people felt.

~your ace mother, mod a

#Anonymous #answered #asks #asexual #asexuality #aromantic #aroace #mod theo #ace #aro

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janiedean · 7 years

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Do you believe in the statement "Islam is a religion of peace"? I think it's a ridiculous statement and I'm sick of people repeating it over and over. Saying it doesn't make it true. I have NOTHING against Muslims as people but the Koran is no better than the Bible when it comes to violence and pretending otherwise is just ridiculous to me. I came across a gifset the other day of a Muslim woman insisting that Islam is "the most feminist religion of all" and it just doesn't make sense to me.

man you’re talking to an atheist so obviously my answer is biased, and I read the bible but not the koran (I read bits not all of it) so my opinion is what it is, but:

given that I think that the bush jr policy of demonizing islam post sept 11th was the dumbest shit he could have done and I’m happily blaming that for 90% of the mess we’re in today and that I don’t think islam is inherently more violent than christianity given that as you said violence in holy books is about that same level

and given that a lot of the koran has been (purposefully or not) misquoted to justify terrorism/fight against terrorism

and given that 90% of the parts of the sharia law we find more abhorrent (ie the ones condemning lgbt+ people, allowing child brides and so on) aren’t actually in the koran but are holy because some interpreters who were also holy men declared them so so a lot of it is - as with christianity - stuff added by the organized part of the religion (like, there isn’t ONE line in the bible openly condemning abortion unless you don’t interpret the sermon of the mount in a specific way but honestly, but according to the catholic church and christianity in its worst incarnations abortion is A SIIIINNNN)

I also think that everyone automatically tries to delete the worst parts of the religion they believe in and the likes and at the same time it’s really hard to question things you were taught since the day you were born. and going like yES BUT THIS LINE IN THE BOOK SAYS THIS doesn’t mean anything because another says the contrary ten pages after and a lot of religious ppl in general haven’t even read either the koran (see: a lot of isis recruits) or the bible (see: most people who tell me that if I read it I’ll convert, then I tell them I did and if they remember the dismembered concubine from the book of kings and they fall from the clouds. aha) and they tend to stick to the parts that are *safer*. ie for christianity everyone moderate says it’s all about the best parts of the gospel (and no one ever remembers my two favorite bits ie when jesus told people who *went around talking in his stead* that he didn’t know them from adam and when he said to one of the two thieves crucified next to him that he had a place in heaven with him hahahahhahahahaha) and never about the worst parts of them or of the old testament (for one, did you know that with the plagues of egypt the pharaoh refused to let moses go because god directly influenced him because he wanted to show how much more powerful he was in comparison to the pharaoh’s false gods, because the poor guy actually would have let moses leave after the sixth plague? YEAH I DIDN’T UNTIL I READ IT EITHER) same as a lot of moderate muslims focus on the best parts of the koran like the peace message and so on and ignore the worst.

now, personally I think that religious books are written in such a way that you can find anything and its contrary inside them. the bible is BOTH old and new testament but even if you decide that the old doesn’t matter because you only follow jesus’s teachings, okay, paul in some of his letters says exactly the contrary of what jesus meant but paul’s letters are in the NT and no one’s taking them out yet. st. augustine is one of the church’s Fathers with the capital F but he came up with predestination (which is a thing that is absolutely not in the NT) and the catholic church ignores it because it eventually rejected that vision. and so on. it’s not surprising that moderate muslims see their religion as a religion of peace and the jihadists use it to fuel terrorism because both interpretations have their valid points. if you’re moderate and want to say muslim religion is peaceful you have your quotes, if you’re not you have others. and so on. so like, I personally think that since to me it’s all about stuff that doesn’t exist it’s all very ridiculous and I honestly can’t conceive killing themselves in the name of someone whose existence you cannot prove never mind that it’s basically the same God just with a different name and a different theological interpretation so like, wtf guys. I don’t think any religion is inherently peaceful or warmongering, I think people make of it what they want and that you need it separated from the state in any case because if that doesn’t happen it’s always going to coincide with someone’s political interests and fanatics will breed more easily.

re the feminism, I have issues in that sense and maybe a clearer opinion tho that might be that there’s things I cannot chalk to cultural relativism to justify, but like: it’s true that in theory islam is not... well, anti-women at its core because let’s all remember that in the middle ages muslim women on paper were better off than europeans unless my high school books lied about that, but it’s true that a lot of the **sharia** law mentioned above is NOT fucking feminist - whatever you mean with it - and I’m honestly... I mean, I get cultural relativism, but like let’s just take the veil. in theory if it’s an imposition it’s not even valid because you have to choose to wear it and it’s all good, but do people choose to wear it in countries like idk taliban afghanistan? do people have a choice about it when it’s not just the veil but covering your whole damned body and you can’t touch someone else’s hand without your husband’s permission? and saying that it’s also valid for men makes me lol because I haven’t seen men under a burqa yet. like everyone has the rights to choose what they wear or not, but when it’s de-humanizing like that (bc burqas are de-humanizing to me sorry) and it’s people who have been taught since they were born that they have to wear it... is that a choice? and like, yeaaah in saudi arabia eight year old girls can marry people thrice their age and if I have a vagina I can’t drive a car, but that’s feminist? like where I teach, one morning each week it’s just women and only women can teach because some don’t/won’t come if men are attending as well and won’t be taught by male teachers. and like... I understand they do it because otherwise they don’t come, but I feel really iffy about accommodating a thing that to me is out of this freaking universe, especially because you get veiled women coming to regular class without a problem. shit like that imo is just backwards and the fact that it happened here fifty years ago as well means that while I won’t judge muslim countries too harshly on that sense... well, we moved past it and we have equality on paper, shouldn’t they have it too? (admittedly I don’t think attaching ideologies to any religion is a good idea because what the hell does FEMINIST RELIGION even mean, catholics are crazy when it comes to worshipping mary so they’re also feminists?? and religion are used to prop up other ideologies every other day so like.... I’m iffy on that period) so on that topic I honestly can’t agree but because I don’t agree that religions are inherently any -ism.

tldr: I think everyone picks and chooses when it comes to religions so saying that it’s THIS OR THAT is ridiculous (christianity from the westboro baptists is not catholicism to say one and they have the same holy book) and that you need to separate them from politics before doing any kind of this discourse. I also don’t agree with this policy of ‘since bush jr policy was BASHING ON ISLAM FOR EVERYTHING’ now we have to do the contrary and ‘EXCUSE ISLAM FOR EVERYTHING’ because it doesn’t help - you have to condemn the bad apples of the bunch and not alienate the good ones, and that means also criticizing where it’s due.

I mean, ffs, it was on the news here the other day but some girl in bologna who came from a muslim family who didn’t want to wear the veil was forcefully shaved by her mother (like shaved all her hair) and she told her teachers saying she didn’t want to live with them anymore because they were pushing the veil and the religion on her and she didn’t want that, and now she’s with the social services. she’s fourteen. that’s feminist? I don’t... really think so. and the fact that I’m atheist and I don’t get it from the pov of a religious person doesn’t mean that I can’t say it’s fucked up when it’s fucked up.

#religion for ts #like I'm all for people finding their balance and ignore the least progressive stuff in their holy books #but like let's not justify the whole bunch of information pls #because some is fucked up and always will be #anyway pls don't throw rotten tomatoes at me you asked I replied xD #obv not you but i just came from a fairly exhausting fb discussion on the atheism topic #and tbh i'm too exhausted to go into that shit #Anonymous #ask post

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kmclaude · 7 years

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i'm cackling bc when i first visited your blog after reading 99rm i was like "ew wtf ??? incest ew necrophilia ew kmclaude is a nasty abuser :(((" and now i'm just like "i'd fuck the entire tiefer-arceneaux family at once and let emile piss on me #noragrats"

I’d let Émile piss on me too, anon.

But serious question -- and not to completely insult you because obviously you came to your senses and we all do silly things, so please don’t take this question as me going “wow u dunce” but more “wtf did I miss something” -- serious question: what is with people assuming or coming to the (stupid) conclusion that if someone talks about something or creates about something, they do that something or are like “yes this is always OK”? Like.....is that something they’re teaching in school nowadays or something? Did things vastly change from when I graduated high school and uni? Where does this absurd and idiotic idea come from?

Like....is there a generation of people assuming Stephen King does the things he writes about? Or that Poppy Z. Brite is a necrophiliac serial killer?

Forgive my rudeness, please, but it’s just incredulous. Like I get finding something squicky or disagreeing with a belief (even if the disagreement is incorrect, there are loads of incorrect people in the world and everyone’s been wrong about something) but what I don’t get is going “this person likes to write/draw/read/watch media about X topic therefore they do X thing/permit X thing in all cases/is totally for X no matter what and/or is an abuser” like...if that is true then...

Who’s gonna tell the FBI that actual cannibal Bryan Fuller is on the loose? Who’s gonna tell M15 that Jo Rowling is an elitist terrorist mass-murdering head of a hate group? Who’s gonna arrest Stephen King the man is a mONSTER HAVE YOU SEEN HIS WORKS

And let’s not even TALK about Born Again Christian, antiquer and golfer, No More Mr. “I Love the Dead” Nice Guy Arachnophobic Psychopath Alice freaking Cooper.

I just. I’m sorry if I come off insulting, I truly am, it just baffles me and it isn’t directed at you in particular, solely and entirely, forever and ever -- it’s a mindset I see and it just throws me off entirely!

So yeah let’s end this on a high note of Émile pissing on someone, that’s pretty hot, he has a nice dick, let’s all think about that (and if anyone’s not into piss or humiliation IDK think of him cumming, there you go)

#those are all from his songs just fyi #kmclaude replies to anon #kmclaudereplies to anon #kmclaudereplies #kmclaudereplies to ask #kmclaude replies to ask

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rangerhanna-56-blog · 7 years

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You're upset bc you got called out on saying something stupid like just man up and say ok I'm wrong I won't do it again sorry like that's all you have to do.... it really is that simple ????

Okay but have you seen my other posts where I said "I'm wrong I get it" "I get it I fucked up"Like I literally acknowledged I fucked up and people still felt the need to send a 17 year old death threats because literally you can't fucking disagree with anyone on this shit website without people attacking you. Like I'm literally being told to kill myself over a sarcastic comment I made and it literally drove me into having a psychotic episode because I literally have multiple psychological problems and I ended up carving awful fucking shit into my body with an actual knife. Like do people on here actually realize when they attack someone, that person might not actually be able to handle being threatened because of something literally so fucking small. I literally went to this person and tried to explain myself and yeah I did it in a petty way and they posted it for literally all their followers to see, but then as soon as I started getting anon hate they were like "but those aren't MY followers". Like how do you ACTUALLY know none of those people aren't your followers tho??? Like do you really think that ur followers are gonna step forward and say "yeah lol I was one of those ppl threatening that girl and saying that her and her family deserve to be killed" legit all because I compared TRUMP to fucking HITLER. Like bitch now that I've had my mental breakdown and I've calmed down a bit I can actually advocate for myself and say I'm allowed to have a differing fucking opinion than someone else and I shouldn't be fucking harassed for it. And idk wtf the whole "white liberalism" thing is when like I've done nothing to show I only care about the white race. Like yeah I'm white but that's literally just it??? Like sorry that I think that history is repeating itself bc THE SIGNS ARE ALL THERE and I have countless people agreeing with me WHO HAVE STUDIED THIS SHIT, that Trump is going to turn this country into something absolutely fucked up (he's literally having neo-nazis work for him like idk how else to fucking make this comparison any clearer???). Like are you just upset bc I compared him to hitler bc that's literally what everyone has been doing and it's annoying or are you literally trying to tell me that there are no similarities between them and that I shouldn't be worried as much as you all should be??? Like as long as you're not a Straight White CIS Christian Male, you're fucked. People are being fucking murdered because of this dude. What I'm trying to say if yeah I'm admitting I fucked up and I literally HAVE BEEN but none of you people people listen so I literally went into full panic mode and caused physical fucking harm to my body that probably requires a doctor to look at (let's be honest im not going to a fucking doctor because if they ask me why all this happened and I tell them it was tumblr discourse, they either won't understand or I'll get the biggest eye roll ever). I literally hope everyone is satisfied with themselves here. Are you happy that you got the "clueless white girl" to finally hurt herself because I hope you are. And the whole thing about me "using my mental illness to manipulate people and make them feel bad for me" is so much bullshit. Yes I had someone take a screenshot btw because I wanted to see how things were playing out. All because you got through this type of shit without support doesn't mean you're a better human being??? This was talked about as if people knew exactly what I suffer from and that it was just me using mild depression or something to excuse the dumb shit I do. And if you haven't fucking noticed yet, I literally just admitted right there that some of the shit I do is in fact dumb.If you want to get into this with me and you really want an explanation I can give it to you because that really isn't half the case. My family literally is full of people who have psychological problems (some of which I don't even know the names of). Just recently my grandfather (a retired police officer) was found hiding in his bedroom from my grandmother with a loaded fucking gun while whispering to it and he was later diagnosed with stage 3 Alzheimer's and he's convinced my grandmother is a member of the Italian mafia sent to assassinate him. I'm not telling you family stories for nothing and I'm sure you guys are gonna have a good laugh about this too because no matter what I say to explain myself I still get treated like shit. Im not even sure if I'm allowed to say this, but if even a team of Harvard Medical Graduates; professionals that people from all around the world seek for help from; can't pinpoint what psychological problems I have, then I shouldn't be given that "trying to manipulate people" shit. A fucking adult said this. If you have any experience with being mentally ill like you say you do, then you know just how fucking difficult it is to properly function and be able to say the right things and advocate for yourself. Do you know how fucking hard it is to fall asleep at night and wake up in the morning knowing that you'll probably have to rely on a caretaker for the rest of your fucking life because you can't make choices for yourself and will need to be under constant supervision so you don't fucking hang yourself one day?? I don't fucking enjoy being a literal walking disease, but thanks for implying that I would ever use it as a fucking tool to get what I want when I want it, you ignorant fuck. You didn't possibly think after screenshotting my mental breakdown that "Hey, someone probably has to have some type of chemical imbalance to type all of this out" before posting it and using it as a prop to get on some fucking high horse. I'm not some mildly depressed idiot fucking white girl who has no clue what happens outside of the cushy walls of my fucking house. I know how fucking horrible and disgusting the human race can be to each other which is part of the reason why I'm like this.I get it! You're so much more fucking smarter than me!!! I'm a stereotypical white western liberal! You caught me red handed! I literally hope that every single one of you have gotten your superiority fix for the day because I've literally had to move blogs because of this. I actually came back to this blog to clean up my mess of posts which is what I do after my episodes, and I happened to notice that one of the anons I had was surprisingly not abuse, but still something bitchy anyway. If you want anything positive to come from me answering this, then I'm just gonna say Thank You for not being like one of the other people who wished death upon me. If you guys still aren't satisfied with this, then I don't fucking know what else to say?? I've explained myself and admitted over and over that I was wrong, but nobody was satisfied until I freaked the fuck out and they got a good laugh out of causing a stupid white girl distress. I'm humiliated now and have pretty much become a laughing stock so yeah. There it is.

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obsessed-withthe-hales · 7 years

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(1/?)So, i have a really weird thing (topic?)I wanted to ask you about. It's kind of cringey and I understand if you don't answer this. I am a shy, social anxiety-filled fifteen year old that, much like yourself, is obsessed with the Hales, Teen Wolf, and a lot of other fictional t.v. shows/books. I'm also very overweight (trying to work on that though but lmao it's a process), and I'm also Christian. Honestly Idk why I am writing you with this but I've followed you for nearly a year now

(2/?) and I went anon because this is kinda aweird thing to bring up, but anyway, on with the point: my best friend, whoI've known for ten years now, has a boyfriend. They've been dating for roughlya year, and they've been having sex. She just turned 16 in December. I wasreally shocked when I found out. I knew that they had sex at least once a whilebefore this, but she told me that it went badly and that she changed her mindhalfway through it and that she felt like she was being forced (3/?) into it and all this other stuff but shestayed with him anyway. Anyway, Friday she told me they've been having sex fora while now actually and of course I always questioned why she was still withhim after that first time because why the heck would you want to stay withsomeone if you feel like they forced you into sex but it's not my life so whatever,at least they're using protection. Okay, further on to the point. There are alot of girls in my grade having sex. I took a vow of (4/?) abstinence a while ago because even though it seems to begetting harder and harder these days to wait until marriage, I saw a meme withJesus in it and a guy and a gal, they both had talk bubbles saying "Iconsent!" but Jesus had one that said "I don't!" And I guessthat got to me because the next thing I know I'm promising Jesus to wait untilmarriage (I'm being serious. I'm not trolling you right now. I'd find the memeand send it if you could do that on this) and I don't judge other (5/?) people if they choose to do different for the same reasonI don't judge people who've had abortions or people who participate inrecreational marijuana use: it's not my body so I'm not going to act like Ishould have an opinion over it. I've also never had a real relationship. Likeyeah, I had those stupid middle school relationships of convenience that lastfor like a week or a month and you where you kiss on the lips every once in awhile and yada yada yada, but never one where you go on (6/?) dates and change your Facebook status and actually developfeelings for the other person and I used to think it was because I'm fat, butI've realized that being fat does not make me ugly, so I started thinking it'sbecause I'm shy and started pushing myself to be more open and that stilldidn't work so finally I complained to my best friend (who I mentioned earlier)and she says it's because people know I don't "put out" and that it'salso because I'm smart and sometimes being pretty and (7/?) smart can be intimidating to people so, in her words,that's why I'm single. Even if it is why it still kind-- scratch that, REALLY,gets to me. And I know a lot of high school relationships don't last and thatthe real stuff doesn't happen until college but I've been feeling really lonelyfor a while now and I'm tired of no boys (or girls) ever taking an interest inme. I'm not saying I'd be the perfect partner in a relationship, but I know I'dtreat the other person with respect and give (8?/) what I have (minus my virginity unless they want to goahead and put a ring on it because I love Jesus), so why the heck is it thesetrampy girls who only care about updating their next Facebook status (I don'thave Facebook, I deleted it a couple months ago) always have boyfriends andgirlfriends and I'm over here spending my Saturday nights reading Teen Wolf fanfiction about fictional characters in amazing relationships and having to hearsecond hand about how amazing it is to (9/?) be in a relationship. And I'm not trying to sound like oneof those boy crazed teenagers whose lives revolve around being in arelationship because I know I can live without being in one. I know it's notthe end of the world if I never find a guy or gal or just don't until later inlife. Life goes on. The world keeps spinning. I just keep hearing about sex andboys and relationships from all these other girls and it makes me jealous andfrustrated and even more lonely all at the same time. (10/10) I am so sorry to flood your ask with my teenage angst haha.I didn't mean for it to turn into a rant and end up being this long. I guesswhat I'm trying to say is, from one Christian gal to another, can you relate?From what I gather you're only older than me by like four or five years so youmust remember what it was like to be fifteen and surrounded by girls like theones I've described. Any advice would be much appreciated but I understand ifyou don't respond. God bless xox

Wow, what a question haha! In all seriousness, I do hope that what I’m about to write can actually offer you some sort of comfort or reassurance or something along those lines. I’m about to pour my heart out, so be prepared!

First, a bit on the sex thing. WHY ARE PEOPLE HAVING SEX SO YOUNG I DON’T UNDERSTAND???? Like, how do you even know what everything is and where it goes and how it works and just.....what?!?! I have NEVER understood that! It completely baffles me. Especially after having sex!

I was 17 when I lost my virginity and (due to many complicated things that have happened since) I wish that it hadn’t happened, but I’m also grateful it did because I learned a lot and my life has taken a path I never quite imagined that it wouldn’t have otherwise. But God has really put abstinence on my heart in the last year and I have dedicated my life to that now.

So please, DO NOT DO ANYTHING YOU DON’T WANT TO DO. You CAN say no! And if you feel called to a path of abstinence, then you follow that path, darling! I think is wonderful and amazing and it really makes me so happy to hear.

However, I know how hard it is when everybody else around you seems to be having sex. Sexual temptation is hard, so hard to deal with. But God won’t give us anything we can’t handle!

Now...

I can honestly relate to so much of what you are saying on such a deep level that it is a little scary. Throughout school I struggled with my weight and my looks and I’ve always been socially awkward and kind of the ‘weird girl’. I’ve also always been rather smart, the top of my class, always got great grades and cared about my work, blah blah blah. Guys didn’t notice me, and the few that did weren’t ones that I necessarily reciprocated feelings for.

So, I know exactly how lonely, difficult and disappointing that existence can be. Especially when you see all your friends or just others around you getting hit on or dating people or in what seem to be amazing relationships.

But then came Ethan.

He and I were together for three years. That relationship was toxic right out of the gate. We were so off and on it was ridiculous. He used me for sexual things. He practically cheated on me, multiple times. And yet he’d tell me how much he loved me and cared about me and couldn’t be without me in his life. And I just took it. All of it.

Until one day I said, ‘I’m a human being and I deserve to be treated with respect and love’. To keep from boring you with all the gory details, I ended up breaking up with him several months after. And a lot of that breakup had to do with the fact that he was a major temptation in my life and God was telling me basically ‘hey, time to stop doing sexual things and start saving yourself for marriage!’

So trust me, relationships aren’t all they seem to be cracked up to be.

And now here I am, trying my best to be a single Christian girl in a world that seems to go very much against all of that (being single and a Christian). And it is tough. So very tough.

I am lonely. Hell, I was in a relationship for 3 years! I’m not used to this whole single thing lol so I completely understand. And all of a sudden it’s like nobody notices me again. I’m back to being that invisible girl, too shy to speak up and when she does it doesn’t seem to get her anywhere. Somewhere between pretty and not pretty enough, always stuck in the in-between of everything. Smart, but not quite smart enough. Skinny, but not quite skinny enough. Blah blah blah.

And it is SO frustrating to see all these people that look superficial or shallow or whatever getting all this attention when you know that you have so much to give. I feel that way all the time!

So I completely, 100% understand. I do!

But the most important thing to remember is that God loves you. He will always love you. You will always be His child, His beloved, made in His image and beautiful just the way you are.

I know it’s hard. It’s so hard. But let the Lord guide you, and I promise He will never steer you wrong!

You’re right, not having a partner right now isn’t the end of the world. But it does suck sometimes. And when those feelings settle in, turn to God for comfort and guidance. Let Him fill up that part that seems to be lacking. Because He’ll do it better than anybody ever could.

Honestly, honey, the best advice I can give is to just keep your chin up. Hold your head high, know your own worth, and don’t compromise it for anything. I know it sucks, I know it’s hard, I know it’s lonely. But one day, one day it’ll pay off. Trust in the Lord, He will provide! He will never give you anything more than you can handle. And He will always love you.

I hope this helped at least a little bit! Please feel free to message me privately if you feel comfortable or send in another anonymous message :) I will always be here to talk and try my best to offer advice and love!!!

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