#i'm going to make more gifs from the final two episodes sometime this week. this is all i have the bandwidth for today

[greenmantle]

The Righteous Gemstones ✞ 3.09 Wonders That Cannot Be Fathomed, Miracles That Cannot Be Counted

#the righteous gemstones #trgedit #mine #trg spoilers #keefe chambers #eli gemstone #i didn't notice while watching that gideon also gives him the thumbs up. love that #i'm going to make more gifs from the final two episodes sometime this week. this is all i have the bandwidth for today

[genericpuff]

Can you call Tina Belcher driving through a parking lot at an anxious snail's pace a driving "style"? So why do we try to use "style" as a defense for LO's pacing problems?

There's something about how Lore Olympus engrosses people within its weekly doses of H x P content and cliffhangers that makes people not realize just how long Lore Olympus takes to get to the point of, well, anything. Many plotlines are setup, and then go untouched for weeks, sometimes months at a time, before seeing any sort of progress, much less a resolution. In this, I'm going to actually give you time ranges on some of the more egregious payoffs and continuations of plotlines that were setup - some that are now resolved, others that have yet to see the light of day.

CONTENT WARNING: I will be discussing the SA plotline, and there will be spoilers for Episode 265. I will also be showing pictures of some rancid ass tattoos, I know that sounds random for what we're discussing, but trust me on this one, I have a point to make. Also there's a Junji Ito panel from The Enigma of Amigara Fault... yeah, that one.

LEUCE

Let's start with an easy one that's not exactly tied to the main plot. The Leuce plotline. She was first introduced in Episode 201 as a 'bargaining chip' from Zeus to Hades, in a misfired attempt to get Hades to call a truce over the embargo between the Underworld and Olympus.

At the time of this episode's release, by all accounts this seemed to be a cut and dry reference to Hades' first wife, Leuce, unfortunately reduced to a mail-order bride who Hades, of course, turns down, because he doesn't want the "I can't believe it's not butter" Persephone, he wants overpriced, tastes-the-same-but-costs-more-because-of-the-brand-name Persephone.

But then she came back, 36 episodes later - in real time, this was roughly 38 weeks for free-to-read users as the series went on a 2 week hiatus near the start of S3 - only to be used as a cliffhanger leading into a recycled Minthe plotline, in which she attempted to seduce Hades in Episode 238, only to be shot down for the second time.

If you're having a tough time wrapping your head around how long 36 weeks really is, that's nine months. If you got pregnant when Leuce was first revealed, you'd be entering the final window of pregnancy by the time she returned, assuming the baby didn't come pre-term.

Another 7 weeks later, enough time to actually get pregnant again following that first baby, we got the sudden continuation of that plot, with Persephone invading her home and filling it with barn animals, with a not-so-subtle threat to Leuce to stay away from her husband.

"But what about the text messages? Were they really from Hades?" Well, if you were someone reading this comic in real time, you wouldn't have this question answered for another SIX EPISODES - that's a month and a half in real time - and the answer would ultimately be "she made it up, she was 'manifesting', none of it's real, they should call her Deleuceional!" Six weeks for a nothingburger answer to wrap up a nothingburger sideplot, all in the pursuit to 'prove' for the 1275903729 time that Hades and Persephone are truly meant to be together.

EROS AND PSYCHE

This is a big one. The Eros x Psyche plotline was one of the most popular romance subplots, second only to Hades and Persephone, throughout the comic. And yet, despite people holding their breath to see what would become of the star-crossed lovers, a mortal and a god-

-readers in September 2021 would not find out how their recent skirmish with Apollo in Episode 171 would resolve itself until Episode 218, A YEAR AND TWO MONTHS - ROUGHLY 60 WEEKS AND A MIDSEASON HIATUS - LATER, and even then it would only show us Eros, who quickly summarizes what happened to him during the entire trial and Kronos arc that his anticipated romance storyline got sidelined for - he got married and now he has a child.

And it wouldn't be for ANOTHER six weeks that his wife and the mother of his child would actually show up, not alongside Eros, but Aphrodite and Hephaestus, in Episode 224.

What happened to her after finally having her 'true form' revealed to Eros? Well, that's not shown for another three weeks in Episode 227. During this a bunch of info about how Psyche got out of that sticky Apollo situation is dumped on us and we just have to go along with it as she becomes a goddess, not because she earned a place among the Olympians, but because Zeus needs her to spy on Apollo, which was actually shown one episode prior in 226.

So let's say you got knocked up again after that Leuce baby, when Eros and Psyche were shot out of the sky. Welp, in the time it took for Rachel to get around explaining what happened to the both of them, now you just had your second baby and for all we know, you could have gone for a third and already be well into or near the end of your first trimester, if you really wanted to get busy. You'd have a Dionysus, a Melinoe, and maybe even a Demophoon. Congratulations.

And speaking of Melinoe-

MELINOE

Turns out the interloper and the child in Tartarus were one and the same, or at least that's what I'm assuming, because otherwise that would mean there's some whole ass other baby to worry about that we haven't even been introduced to yet.

Melinoe, or "the child deity", was first established in Episode 218.

But as per LO tradition, the child would only mentioned in passing every now and then until finally being revealed as Melinoe in Episode 252, a whopping... THIRTY EIGHT FUCKING WEEKS LATER.

And that waiting is still ongoing as Melinoe is, of course, still trapped in Tartarus, with no end in sight. Since then, Hades and Persephone have gotten married, kidnapped a child, Persephone has terrorized a nymph and caused yet ANOTHER genocide, and they've resurrected a child that was suddenly revealed to be Demeter's. Thirty eight weeks and counting of dragging on a plotline that we're supposed to believe is dire while the characters do sweet fuck all.

What was the name of that other dream baby that Rachel referenced from some obscure non-legitimate source?

Riiiight, Brimos. Congrats, there's pregnancy number 4. But can we find a way to make a fifth happen?

KASSANDRA

We're first introduced to Kassandra, another implied victim of Apollo's, in Episode 226 when a photo of her is found on Apollo's pen drive which was conveniently left on the ground for Psyche to swipe.

In Episode 227, they theorize on how they could track down this mystery woman, using either Eros or Aphrodite's abilities to find her through the power of

✨love✨

How will that actually work though? Has anyone ever been in love with Kassandra, or has she ever been in love with anyone else?

Any bets on how long it would be until we'd get our answer?

Episode 251. The same episode where we're finally told about Leuce's delusions, we suddenly skip to the reveal of Kassandra being Apollo's personal oracle.

And it still doesn't end up answering our question as to how Kassandra was tracked down, by the way. Eros and Psyche sorta just conveniently find her at the same time Apollo happens to be there when he's getting her to deliver her big prophecy to him.

That's twenty four weeks, meaning you're now near the end of your second trimester with child #4. Whoever the child is remains to be seen but I'm sure Rachel will find a way to shoehorn another helpless baby into the plot for Hades and Persephone to rescue who we can use for this metaphor.

But none of these come close to the greatest unresolved plotline of them all, the one plotline that has outlasted even the main H x P plotline of Lore Olympus' story-

APOLLO

Or more specifically, the SA. Rachel has tried so hard to twist Apollo into a villain of Disney proportions, through his sudden involvement with Ouranos, while also using him as a mouthpiece for her own critics by having him literally dish out word-for-word the criticisms that have been made towards Rachel's writing of Persephone-

But the core foundation of his plotline goes all the way back to 2018, when he assaulted Persephone, a plotline that has yet to resolve itself or show any progression beyond Rachel's half-baked attempts at speedrunning Persephone's healing process, while Apollo is still at large and hasn't been brought to justice.

We've seen her in very poorly-written therapy where her assault was addressed once. We've seen her grapple with the potential consequences of the SA through a gynecologist scene that, as I've discussed before, does more harm than good in helping the discussion around women's sexual health. And of course, Rachel will pepper in vague references to the SA every now and then when she's bothered to remember that it's a plotline she wrote and still hasn't resolved:

And judging by how the story has been progressing, Rachel seems far more intent on simply using Apollo as a mouthpiece for criticism and a puppet for Ouranos rather than focusing on the bigger issues, all while Persephone has helped more people cope with the assault that happened to her rather than receiving help herself.

What's really telling is that despite half of the Olympians at this point knowing what Apollo did, not one of them even tries to convince Persephone to come forward, or say something themselves. Daphne has more than enough reason to come forward. Artemis, Hera, Eros, Hermes, and Hephaestus all know what he did, and yet none of them say a thing, even when those of them who haven't been conveniently shoehorned out of the plot are still in the same room as him-

The assault scene happened in August 2018. It's been five and a half years since it was established, and while there have been small efforts made to resolve it - from Hera and Hephaestus having the photos deleted to Persephone seeking therapy - there's less reason now than ever for it to not be addressed, especially with so much at stake. I could side with Persephone not wanting to say anything in the beginning, when he was blackmailing her with the photos and her TGOEM scholarship was on the line, but now that she's a Queen, rich, and married to Hades, living in the Underworld where he can't get to her, without any schooling or scholarship or job to worry about or the photos hanging over her head, it comes across as flat out irresponsible that not a single person thinks it's worth mentioning. Even the narrative itself seems to be trying to undo the SA entirely.

At this point, I'm not confident it will be mentioned at all, and that Apollo will be conveniently dealt with as a pawn of Ouranos rather than as a perpetrator of violence towards women.

A FINAL ANALYSIS OF LO'S PACING

There are certainly far more examples of this weekly edging happening throughout LO, but I hope the ones I provided get across the point I'm trying to make about its pacing.

Of course, none of these gaps in time are happening back-to-back-to-back. This is Lore Olympus' writing "style", if you can call it that - constantly bombard the reader with separate plot points so that they'll either not remember the ones that were left behind, or so that Rachel can buy herself time to get herself out of the corner she wrote herself into. It's the equivalent of clickbait, constantly grabbing your attention with shiny new things that will replace whatever you just saw in your brain, on a constantly repeating cycle. It's the writing process of inexperienced amateurs, like what you'd see in short stories written by fifth graders - "and then this happened, and then this happened, and then this happened", with no theme or overarching meaning tying them together; and if you were to ask them why a certain thing happens, especially if it logically doesn't make sense, the answer is just, "well, because it does." There's no rhyme or reason, they just thought it was cool.

And I say "style" because while fans of LO have definitely defended the story's pacing as just a writing style, the actual execution of what they're implying is painful to watch and not what any experienced writer would call a legitimate style. It's not uncommon at all in long-running series like this to jump from plotline to plotline, often times longform stories like these have to balance multiple side plots at once to keep things engaging and to bulk up the plot with more actual content.

But in most cases, the reader will expect the speed of a plot's resolution to be relative to its urgency. If a casual B plot with low stakes is introduced, it's not necessarily doing any harm if it just sits there for a bit before finally being resolved. After all, it's low stakes and no one is being hurt by it existing on the sidelines. It might feel a bit like pointless fluff, but there's nothing necessarily wrong with fluff and it can offer fun and relaxed reprieves from the overarching narrative, assuming you integrate them well so they're not drawing attention away from those more urgent plotlines at the worst possible times (looking at you, Stranger Things S2 Episode 7-)

But when even the high stakes plots are being hung out to dry and treated like distractions and fluff, it comes across less like a decisive writing "style" and more just directionless pantsing from an inexperienced writer who's gotten themselves in way too deep.

And that's what really separates Rachel's writing problems from "style". Style is decisive. Style is the act of referencing over a set period of time, crafting what you like and what you've learned into something new, with rounds and rounds of fine-tuning. Style is experience put into action.

And, while I don't typically like using my own work as a comparison, LORE | REKINDLED is meant to try and recapture the original magic of Lore Olympus' art style and writing foundations - and even then, you can still see the clear difference between Episodes 14 and 44, which use the same panel from the same scene, but look vastly different due to the improvement and refinement that's happened over time.

Same style, but different levels of experience and skill, which is to be expected after weeks and weeks of fine-tuning and deliberate practice.

If you're lacking in your fundamentals, whether in art or writing, you can't equate that lack of skill to "style" because you're not choosing to be inexperienced, you just are. And that's okay! But to try and pass it off as 'style' implies that you're choosing to be inexperienced - when in reality, if you tried to put out anything beyond your skill level, you simply wouldn't be able to, because you haven't gained those skills yet. Like fifth graders writing short stories with the "and then this happened" model, "it's just my style" is often used as an excuse by young artists and writers who don't understand that style is not exclusively an end result of inexperience.

I'm gonna go on a tangent here, but there's this controversial but trendy style in tattooing called 'ignorant', and it's best defined as "tattooing badly on purpose".

These tattoos are regularly praised for their simplistic ingenuity and visual aesthetic but equally criticized for being the opposite of what many artists have worked to overcome - being "bad at art". After all, who would willingly pay for a bad-looking tattoo? It's because it's the style that's in demand. I would argue that it takes a lot of confidence and mastery of the craft to be purposefully bad at it and make it look good, as contradictory as that sounds.

As much as the lines may be wobbly and the anatomy poor, ignorant style tattoos are done purposefully by experienced artists who still know how to properly tattoo. As much as they may look like they were drawn by a middle schooler, they will still heal properly, the lines will hold up, and the client will not (or at least, should not) experience any excessive scarring or unhygienic practices as one would experience from an actual inexperienced artist-

In a genuinely poorly-done tattoo, the evidence of the inexperience is literally written all over the body. The skin swells, the ink bleeds out, the lines are inconsistent in their depth, and there's clear signs of trauma to the skin that will undoubtedly result in a poorly-healed tattoo (and that's not even getting into the larger health risks such as contracting blood diseases due to a poorly kept space). It's not hard to see the difference between a bad tattoo and a tattoo that's intentionally bad.

It's the age old saying in a different medium - only once you learn the rules can you properly break them.

Rachel never learned these rules in her writing and it's evident to anyone who knows these rules and is viewing LO through a critical lens - or in my case, experiencing it on a week to week basis. It's a regularly occurring problem in the medium of webcomics as a whole - thinking that knowing how to draw is enough, and that writing comes dead last, if at all. When in reality, comics are a marriage of art and writing, you can't simply do one really well and allow the other to drag behind. That's not to say there aren't comics that succeed at having bad art and good writing, if anything a well-written comic can save bad art-

But if you have a comic with good art and bad writing, that's when a comic opens itself up to harsher criticism. As much as art may be the visual forefront of comics, if you want to keep your audience along for the long road that stretches ahead, you need to have a strong foundation in writing, or at least, enough of a plan to ensure you're not driving in the dark. The art can be as gorgeous as you want it to be, but if the plot is weak, then no one will have any reason to check back in week to week.

And such is Lore Olympus' biggest weakness. Much of what we praise LO for back in its first season was simply its foundation. It's very easy to praise a story's writing when it hasn't had to payoff what it's setup. Having ideas is easy, and early LO is rife with good ideas - but many of those ideas have since fallen flat, even the ones you wouldn't expect.

Ideas are a dime a dozen, but actually executing them in a way that can be engaging from start to finish and resolve itself in a way that's satisfying is a whole other challenge that many creators, including Rachel, find themselves unable to tackle; and nothing is a greater example of that than LO's third season, which is now fumbling its plotlines that have failed to resolve themselves properly after 5 years, while introducing new ones that serve as mere distractions, as if they were a laser pointer aimed at a cat.

I hear the argument, "LO is a better story if you binge read it" a lot, which - while I can certainly understand in today's culture of content that's churned out to be binged - I still fail to see how it actually makes LO a better story. Binge-reading LO doesn't remove the pointless plotlines. It doesn't fix its blatant timeline problems, its retcons, or its inability to stay focused on one topic for more than 5 panels. All it really fixes is the waiting, the ritualistic toiling over each and every cliffhanger that caps off the weekly episodes just for them to either be resolved in the next week or left behind with no in-between. And while having all that waiting removed certainly makes the reading experience a lot smoother, it doesn't make the story or its writing better.

The relationship between a story's writing and how the audience experiences it shouldn't be overlooked. Many stories depend on how the audience experiences it within the mind to succeed and leave an impression.

Junji Ito utilizes the dreaded page turn to scare his audience, an effect that can only be truly gained and appreciated if you read his books in traditional print.

Marvel spent years meticulously building up its Avengers franchise, culminating in a once-in-a-lifetime cinematic event through Avengers: Endgame, which is truly the epitome of "you had to be there", because if you watch Avengers: Endgame in 2024 in your living room, you're likely not going to experience the same level of hype as audiences experiencing it in the theater in 2019.

The same can be said for James' Cameron's Avatar, which entranced audiences with its innovative motion capture CGI and immersive 3D effects, an experience that could only be lived to the fullest if you saw it in 3D in IMAX theaters back in 2009. Without that experience, most people in 2024 find the movie to be pretty generic and uninteresting, a reverse Pocahontas with blue people in space, but when it first released in IMAX theaters in 2009, it was a cultural and technological phenomenon due to how advanced it was in its VFX. I can't even share with you clips of it, because obviously it would just be proving my point to try and show you how groundbreaking Avatar was in theaters through a bad shaky cam Youtube upload of its IMAX release on Youtube, but let's just say that it wasn't uncommon for people to brag about how many times they'd gone back to watch the same movie just to feel what they felt from the first showing all over again.

All that's to say that while Lore Olympus may offer a 'better' reading experience when binge-read - regardless of whether or not it actually helps the story's pacing problems - the reality is that LO is still being written exclusively with the weekly format in mind, and its been very much to its detriment, both in the short-term and in the long-term. Readers are often left in the dark on plotlines for weeks at a time, Rachel loses track of what she has and hasn't addressed, and the extended waiting times trick readers into believing that weeks have passed in the comic's story, when in reality it's only been a day or two, sometimes as little as hours depending on the sequence; meanwhile, if you binge episodes that had those problems in hindsight, you'll likely be a lot more quick to notice how many plot beats are either retconned or abandoned entirely, because you don't have the weekly waiting times artificially inflating the pacing of the story and causing you to forget what was established weeks before, because when binged, those weeks are reduced to hours and minutes.

And worst of all, with the assumption that you're reading on a weekly basis - as it wants you to do - Rachel tries to pull clever stunts by matching up LO's episodes with real life dates and holidays, which often just makes the story beats feel rushed or random in their execution - because to the vast majority of readers who haven't caught on to this or are reading the episodes through the physical books, they are rushed and random, and they can't exactly explain why.

Binging these episodes doesn't solve the problem, if anything it exemplifies them because, as a shining example, Hades and Persephone suddenly get married right in the middle of an ongoing issue, which isn't exactly the best time to wrap up the story's main plotline. Since then readers have become less and less interested in their story, and can you blame them? By all accounts their story is over. Everything now just feels tacked on to give them something to do in a story they no longer fit into.

There's an episode behind the FastPass lock right now, Episode 265. It unlocks for free on February 17th, three days after Valentine's Day. Guess what episode it is?

Ah yes, the episode where Hades' initiates sex without consent with his wife who's suffering from panic attacks, who also happens to be a rape victim. Happy Valentine's Day, everyone.

I actually made this particular discovery while writing this essay, so that was a very unwelcome surprise, but it explains the sudden random shift from Persephone being so stressed over the ongoing situation that she's passed out to Hades just deciding for the both of them that now's the time to have sex. As much as the fans will defend this as a husband and wife's last chance at intimacy before diving into a dangerous situation, they'll also still conveniently forget - just like the narrative and Rachel herself - that Persephone is a rape victim, and Hades initiating sex with her after nearly having a panic attack isn't exactly a good look.

This is why our theories as to when LO ends are so firmly cemented in one specific time range, because the story's pacing and distractions seem only intent in one thing - getting the story to last until spring, when the series will most likely conclude. It's basically been all but confirmed by Rachel, from her stating the series would be ending in early 2024, to Inklore - an imprint that seems designed specifically for Rachel and LO - launching officially in spring of this year, undoubtedly just in time for Rachel to wrap up LO for good.

(and boy, do I have some words about Inklore and its plans for "Rachel Smythe Presents", but that's another essay entirely.)

At the end of the day, LO's pacing is equivalent to paint drying on the wall, but it relentlessly convinces us to keep watching because the paint is blue and pink and maybe, maybe it'll turn into a piece of art. But as is evident in the comment sections of the newest episodes, even the fans are starting to realize that paint will not magically turn into the final piece of art they've been waiting to see if the hand that wields it doesn't know what it's doing.

Though style may be gained as an accidental side effect of one's influences and experiences, what Lore Olympus' intent is remains to be seen, and the longer the story goes on, the blurrier whatever intent it could have becomes. Unless it somehow manages to pull off a twist of Attack on Titan proportions that thoroughly explains and ties together the plotlines that have been left in the rearview mirror, the vehicle that is LO will continue to trudge along at a snail's pace, until it inevitably either crosses the finish line or crashes - but by that point, anyone waiting for it could very well be gone, their good faith left behind at the starting line when there was still plenty of time to change its trajectory or stop.

Such a time is long, long gone.

#lore olympus critical #anti lore olympus #lo critical

[simp4pedropascal75]

Secretary (Javier Peña x Reader)

summary: You graduated from university with dreams of becoming a DEA agent. One year before your graduation, a class trip took you to Colombia, where you met Javier Peña. The two of you quickly bonded over the six months you spent together, but after you left, he grew distant. When you return as a freshly minted DEA agent, you discover that you have not been hired as a DEA agent, but as a secretary.

words: 5.2k

this ff takes place in the late 1980s! (but you still can chat with him? yeah, doesn't make sense)

trigger warnings: 18+, MINORS DNI, age gap(reader in her 20s, Javier in his late 30s), explict language, mentioning of s3x in public, fluff, violence, smoking, being catcalled and harrased by a man, a little bit of angst (?), spoilers of narcos season 1 (?), one mention of y/n

a/n: sorry for taking a while for writing a new ff, but i thank you for over 500 likes on bad guy and also thank you so much for over 108 followers<3 this really keeps me motivated to write.

I also apologize if I mess up the plot of narcos and don't get everything right like it is in the series. English is not my first language and I'm not finished with the series yet. I just finished season 2 episode 3, and lord have mercy with this sex scene of pedro.

But please don't spoiler me in the comments what happens next in the series, thanks<3

And I guess I'll be making a little series out of this, when my creativity is working, what do you think?

i wish you a fun time reading:)

-------------------♡❀˖⁺. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀♡--------------------

You are finally getting your mark on your uniform from your teacher. You stand there with a proud smile, looking into the crowd and seeing your parents.

You finally graduated from university to be a DEA agent.

Since you were a kid, your dream was always being a DEA agent, just like your dad. Your dad was stationed in Colombia, that’s why you didn’t see him that much, but when you came visiting him or he came home to Miami, he told you about his stories. He told you how he chased drug traffickers, went on missions and all the other stuff. As a kid, it just amazed you.

That’s why you began to train early for being an DEA agent. Since you were 5, you started solving riddles, like: ‘who stole grandma’s cat?’ and so on. When you got older, you loved solving murder, drug cases or already solved cases from your dad, which you had to solve again.

And it was pretty fun… and to be honest, you were god damn good.

That’s why after you finished high school with 19 years, you went to a DEA university. You were lying, if you're saying it wasn’t pretty hard… sometimes, when you were on your lowest, you even thought about quitting. But even if it was difficult, you didn’t want to throw away your dream, so, you kept going.

One year before your graduation, you went to Colombia with your class. You stayed there 6 months and of course your lessons continued there.

You visited the station where your dad was working and that was also the time where the hunt of Pablo Escobar started. And also, the time… well, where you met Javier Peña.

Every Sunday, you and your class were allowed to go to the station and were shown around, got told some stories and some tips how life works as a DEA agent. It was pretty interesting…

and who really made it interesting was Javi.

You and Javier got pretty close for the whole six months. You got friends… well maybe a little more than that…

Of course, you also met his partner Steve Murphy and you got along also, but just as friends.

You didn’t remember exactly how everything with Javier started, but in the first weeks you were going to the station, you and Javi always talked and you two just got along well. Sometimes he would steal you from the rest of the group to show you some more private folders, because he knew how interested you were in all of this… and also, to make out with you.

But expect of how good he kisses… or fucks.

He was there when you needed him.

Unfortunately, in the last month, your dad got injured when he was on a mission with Javier and Steve. Your dad got shot bad in a shooting and when you got the news, Javi was there to comfort you. Luckily, your dad did survive, but he was left incapable of working ever again.

Also, you didn’t ever know, what you and Javier really are. You know, he slept with a lot of women, mostly to gain information for work, but he also stopped sleeping with other women, for the whole six months when he was with you,

well, that’s what Steve told you.

But he never actually asked you if you would be his girlfriend or something… but neither did you.

One time when he showed your class around, the topic was the balance between work and personal life. He told everyone that he personally doesn’t do ‘relationships’ because of work and he isn’t interested in it, he finds it more exciting to get to know many women. And that’s what probably kept you from asking him because you were scared to get rejected.

Of course, you fell in love with him, but you thought he didn’t.

Also, your dad doesn’t know anything about what you and Javier had… and if he would have found out, he would probably fire Javier. Since his incident he was very protective over you and worried about you getting a DEA agent like him.

But nothing got in your way again, even if you were really not feeling great because Javi and you barley had contact after you left.

You kept going.

And now you're finally standing on the stage, proud with your mark on your uniform and even graduated as the class best.

At the evening you begin packing your suitcase for the flight to Colombia. You planned since the beginning of your studies, to go back to Colombia and work at the same station your dad did. You feel excited of the thought that your dream is finally going true. Also… how will it be meeting Javi again?

You sigh at the thought and suddenly your phone vibrates. You grab it and look on the display.

-

Javi

‘heard you graduated, congratulations, hermosa.

-

Your heart skips as he writes you that and you don’t notice how red your cheeks get. He didn’t write you often, nearly never, but when he did, he continued calling you hermosa, cariño,… and all the other names he had for you.

-

you

thanks, agent. maybe I’ll be your boss soon.

Javi

you wish. your dad told me to pick you up at the airport tomorrow.

-

You start to get a nervous feeling in your chest, but also can’t help to smile.

-

you

okay, looking forward for tomorrow then, agent.

Javi

see you tomorrow, cariño.

-

You throw your phone on your bed and lay down next to it. You can’t keep down your butterflies in your stomach. The thought of seeing him again after one year has you smiling, but also getting you even more nervous.

What should I say when he picks me up?

Should you hug him? What if he kisses me?!

God, I really need to know what to talk about, I hate awkward silence.

You think and start panicking. You groan in frustration into your pillow. You grab after your phone and scroll through your chats with Javi.

Your smile fades as you see your calls he didn’t pick up, how he responded to some messages from you after literally one month. Sometimes he didn’t even respond. You know, he has really much work to do and doesn’t have it easy… but seeing how he barley contacted you, makes you feel disappointed… you really thought he would like you back…

Maybe I have to high expectations, you think.

Maybe he doesn’t care so much about that, but you do. You gave him your trust in so many ways…

And with that thought, you get up with a sigh and look frustrated at your closet. You watch at some of your bikinis. “yeah, I think I’m going to take this one”, you mumble to yourself with a smirk, taking the string bikini in his favourite colour.

…

You walk towards the exit with your two suitcases and back bag. As you step out of the airport, you take in the warm, tropical breezes. You feel the air brushing across your skin and hair. The sun’s rays are warm and comforting as they peek through the clouds. You take a deep breath and close your eyes, taking a moment for yourself that you’re finally reaching your dream.

“bienvenido a casa, hermosa.”, you hear a very familiar voice saying and you wince.

“goddammit- you scared the shit out of me”, you say out of breath and then take a moment to look at him. He’s leaned against the car, with a cigarette between his fingers. Your feelings are going insane again. He’s still the same, just like when you left. But… he got a little more muscular.

“really? that’s how you act when we see each other after this long time?”, he chuckles and raises an eyebrow.

“shut up”, you mumble as you roll your eyes and walk towards him. You don’t think about it and just wrap your hands around his neck and pull him into a hug. You hug him tightly and you don’t know why, but your eyes start to get wet. Smelling his scent again of cigarettes, leather and musk… it’s addicting.

As you feel how he pulls you closer by wrapping his hands around your waist, your heart skips.

“missed me?”, he whispers and you sense his smirk. “maybe.”, you answer and even if you don’t want to, you end the hug and go some steps back to take your suitcases.

As you feel a wet drop rolling down your cheek, you immediately wipe the tear away and pull yourself together to give him a happy smile. “would you mind helping me with these?”, you point out your baggage.

Javi chuckles as he takes the last drag out of his cigarette until he throws it away and takes two of your suitcases, putting it into the trunk. “god woman-, how many clothes have you in these?”, he gasps and closes it.

“‘need something to dress, you know”, you chuckle and roll your eyes while going into the car. You expected him to say something like: “around me you won’t have to wear many clothes”, but… obviously he holds himself back.

You take a seat next to him and he starts the engine, drinking away from the parking lot. You roll down the window to let the warm breeze of Colombia fly against you. As you were driving through the city, you couldn’t help but just stare out of the window. “feels good to be here again”, you mumble and notice how much you missed this.

You expected him to say something like: “feels good to have you near me again”, but no… nothing.

After a while you finally hear his voice again. “class’s best huh?”, he chuckles and you roll your eyes. “yeah. my dad told you?, you ask and see him nod. “yeah”

“How’s the situation with Pablo? I watched the news, but they don’t tell much and you never know if they’re telling real shit.”, you ask while looking at all the buildings. You see kids play soccer outside and smile. “He’s a fucking pain in the ass, that’s what I can tell you”, Javier mumbles while concentrating on the road.

“You know, we’ll be working together now, you can tell me?”, you point out and raise your eyebrows.

“Let me say, the situation got worse. It’s true that he killed all these people by blowing up an airplane”, he answers and you gulp when you hear that. “There’s a fuckin’ war right in Colombia.”, he adds.

You see that he’s tense because of this topic. As you take a closer look at his face, you also notice he didn’t get proper sleep for like a whole month. “And… you’re fine?”, you mumble concerned.

“I’m fine, hermosa. Nothing to worry about.”, he answers and drives in the streets of Medellin. You remember now where you are. You see the streets you and your class walked down. You also remember that you will soon drive past an ice cream truck… and memories pop up in your mind.

…

Javier kidnapped you from a trip with your class through the streets of Medellin, again. You were walking down the road, he was right behind you and constantly staring at your ass, because you wore a shorts.

How couldn’t you? It was like 40 degrees in the middle of the day.

A heat wave was surrounding you and the sun was shining right into your face. “you’re not very unobtrusive when it comes to staring, you know.”, you smirk and take a quick look behind you.

“maybe I don’t want to be unobtrusive…”, he says while taking a drag from his cigarette. You roll your eyes at him. You just continue walking and hear a chuckle behind you as you rolled your eyes.

As you keep walking, you spot an ice cream truck. “You know, I really need to cool down now.”, you say and with that you just cross the street, walking towards the ice cream truck. “ice cream, really?”, you hear Javi saying behind you. “You want one too?”, you ask but he shakes his head to no in response.

“Hola señor, me gustaría una cucharada de vainilla y fresa en la oblea, por favor.”, you order in Spanish. You smile proud as the man in the truck understands you and gives you a smile. “Impressing.”, you hear Javier whispering right behind you what makes you laugh. Your Spanish wasn’t actually that bad, when you came to Colombia as a kid to visit your dad, you heard this language all around you. And in school you also had some Spanish lessons.

The man hands you over the ice cream and you hand him the money instead. “Gracias”, you say with a kind smile and then go on the crosswalk again. You and Peña walked to a shady spot, to give you two a break from the burning sun.

You start licking your ice cream from the bottom to the top. And, he was watching you.

He sees how you take long stripes of the ice cream, sometimes licking just the tip. Because of the hot Colombian sun, the ice cream begins to melt quickly.

Drops of ice cream land on your hot, light sweated neck, your thighs and your chin. Then, also on your tank top. “Fuck…,” you mumble and don’t notice how hard you’re making it for Javier. You take your finger, wipe the ice cream away and lick it off your finger.

“goddammit, y/n.”, you hear him cuss quietly, you look at him and notice the bulge on his jeans. “Ops.”, you say innocently and chuckle. You just continue licking your ice cream while looking directly into his eyes. You love teasing him… and always know where it leads you too.

It doesn’t take long to Javier grab your arm and drag you into a small alley. You let your ice cream fall, because of him. “Javi! My ice cream!”, you say literally heart broken like a kid and pout.

Suddenly you feel his tongue licking up the ice cream, which landed on your neck. “Javi, what are you-“, he cuts you off by smashing his lips onto yours. His tongue slips into your mouth, tasting the flavour of your ice cream.

Some minutes later, you find yourself being fucked from behind and pressed against the cold wall.

…

You don’t notice you’re pressing your tights together, but he does. “How about we get some ice cream? I really want to have ice cream now”, you ask with a slight smile on your face. You wanted to see if he remembered, if his body still responses to the memories of you.

And… it does.

He hesitates and wants to disagree. “Please...”, you beg and you know one thing, he can’t resist your begging… well, not for a long time.

You hear him let out a loud sigh, before whispering a quiet: “okay”.

Yup, still works, you think.

He pulls over and parks right next to the ice cream truck. And it’s really the same as one year ago.

You get out of the car and order yourself an ice cream, you feel him looking at you while you’re waiting. After you finally got your ice cream, you come back in the car and buckle up. You took the same flavours as last time. You take a long stripe of the ice cream and let out a soft satisfying moan.

God, how you missed this.

You hear Javier starting the engine quite impulsive and you can’t help but chuckle.

“So, where we’re going?”, you ask while licking your ice cream. “I’ll let you out at your dads old apartment. You can get yourself comfortable there and unpack your suitcases until I pick you up to drive to the station.”, he says tense but focussed on the road. You let out a cute short “okay” and just continued looking out of the window.

After thirty minutes, you arrive at the building where your dad’s old apartment was. You get out of the car and Javier opens the trunk, taking out your suitcases. As you wanted to take the suitcases, Javier has them already in his grip and getting them up the stairs.

“such a gentleman”, you tease and he opens the door of your building. “just get your ass up these stairs”, he says while rolling his eyes and you laugh.

As you two walked up some stairs, you finally arrived at your apartment. He gets out the keys your dad left for you and locks up the door. You walk through the door and immediately look around while Javier is getting your baggage inside. “It’s cute”, you say and walk to the front door, where he’s standing.

“There you go, cariño.”, he hands you over the keys, “‘gonna pick you up at 4, okay?”, you nod in response. “Thanks”, you say to him with a smile before he closes the door and you see him driving away.

You sigh and everything still feels pretty unrealistic. You go on your small balcony, feeling the hot sun burning in your skin. “I’m back, Colombia.”

You started unpacking your suitcase and made yourself comfortable. You took a shower, put a little make up on to cover the rings under your eyes and got yourself a dress. You’re wearing a white tank top with a shorts, since it’s still very hot outside. “I really need to go grocery shopping...”, you mumble when you’re looking in the empty fridge. You grab an apple out your bag pack and take a bite.

You look at the clock and it’s already 4 o’clock. You grab your cardigan, in case it gets colder in the evening and walk down the stairs, going out on the street and looking around for Javier. It doesn’t take long until you see a black Jeep Cherokee driving down the street.

Yeah, that’s him.

He pulls over and is leaned out of the window with a cigarette in his fingers. He’s wearing the same as in the morning, but now with yellow toned sunglasses.

God, he looks fucking hot.

“Ready?”, he asks while taking a drag of his cigarette. “always”, you reply with a smirk and get in the car. As he starts driving, you feel the excitement building up in you. The thought of you finally working and getting your place in a DEA station, makes your heart jump from happinesses. You worked your whole life for this.

You don’t live far away from the station and as Javier was parking, you saw Steve waiting outside. A big smile comes across your face. You two get out of the car and we’re walking towards the entrance.

“Hello, newbie”, Steve chuckles as he pulls you into a hug. “Shut up”, you roll your eyes and hug him back. “good to see you again”, he says as he lets go of you and you give him a smile. “good to see you too”, you reply and suddenly the door opens and Colonel Carrillo comes out.

You’ve seen him not often, just sometimes when your dad talked with him. “Buenos días, señorita Álvarez”, he says and offers his hand for a handshake. You give him a smile. “Colonel Carrillo.”, you nod and shake his hand, as Javi and Steve greet him too. ”also congratulations for graduating”, he says kind but with a stern face. “Follow me”, he says and walks into the station with you three following.

You squeak quietly because of excitement and your heart beats out of your chest. You walk through the hallway, and already seeing the office of the DEA agent, but instead of walking further, Carrillo opens the door to the secretary’s office.

“There you go”, he says and you just stand there confused. But not only you’re confused, you also feel Javier and Steve’s confusing look. “Um… that’s the secretary’s office”, you mumble and Carrillo nods. “Yeah.”, he says confidently. “I’m a DEA agent, sir.”, you point out, still completely confused.

“Oh, your father didn’t told you yet?”, you shake your head to no. “Your dad wanted you to watch first, to get some feeling for the job before working completely as a DEA agent. Also, the case with Pablo Escobar is kind of heavy.”, Carrillo continues explaining and you can’t believe what you’re hearing.

“What.”, you gasp slightly and feeling complete anger flowing through your whole body.

“‘being your boss soon’, huh?”, you hear Javi quoting your message with a chuckle. You find that anything but funny. “Shut the fuck up.”, you growl to him, and then force a smile to Carrillo.

“If you would excuse me for a minute, sir.”, you mumble tensely and get out of the office, walking out of the station and calling your dad. Murphy and Peña follow you outside, watching you walk up and down while holding your cellphone to your ear.

“poor girl.”, Steve sighs while leaning against the wall. “guess daddy is pretty scared for her”, he adds and Javi sighs while lighting up a cigarette, handing the lighter to Steve. “I mean, she isn’t bad… I think she would be a good help for us.”, Javi says while taking a drag of his cigarette while they watch you literally yell into your cellphone.

“Dad what the actual fuck?! You know how hard I worked for becoming an agent, and now you’re hiring me as the fucking secretary?”, you yell upset. “You’re not even working as the Colonel with Carrillo anymore, how can you still decide something like that!?”

“I wouldn’t want to get into an argument with her, that’s clear..”, Steve mumbles as he’s taking a drag of his cigarette too and looks over to Javi, who’s just watching you.

“You’re planning to fuck with her again?”, he asks and laughs slightly. “Shut up, Murphy”, Javi mumbles. “No I mean seriously… I know you like her, man”, Steve says while you’re still yelling into your phone, shortly before throwing it on the street.

“‘dunno… I didn’t reply to her calls, or texts often after she left…”, Javi sighs.

“Wow.”, Steve gasps as he finishes smoking. “You really are an asshole”, Steve points out and claps on his shoulder.

“but seriously, she likes you, Peña. Make it up to her ”, he says seriously while you’re on the edge to destroy your phone. “You really need a woman in your life, man”.

“Dad, I’m fucking 26! I can take care of myself”, they hear and see you scream.

Javi starts thinking about Steve words and finishes his cigarette too.

“she’s not gonna throw her phone, is she?”, Steve asks while raising his eyebrows as he keeps watching you how literally go rage. “If you think that, you don’t know her enough”, Javi just answers and one second later, you hang up and throw your cellphone directly throw it on the ground.

Steve just stays there in shock. “Told you”, Javi chuckles. As Steve sees how you walk towards them, he immediately makes his way into the station again. “‘need to do some paperwork”, he excuses and Javi rolls his eyes at him.

You take a deep breath and walk to Javi. “Well unfortunately my dad thinks I’m incapable of taking care and defending myself, even if I trained my whole fucking life for this.”, you complain and run your hand through your hair.

“'guess being class best and graduating after such a long time, isn’t enough.”, you sigh and try to calm down. Javi just keeps looking at you.

“I’ll talk to him”, he suddenly says and you look at him. “what? with my dad? that won’t help”, you scoff. “No, I mean with Colonel Carrillo. "I have a good rapport with him.”, he tells you and puts his hand into his pockets.

“If it doesn’t help, you can come over to us in secret, going through some folders and stuff”, he suggests and you nod slowly. “yeah…”, you just sigh. “thanks.. “, you add, turn around and take your phone with a pretty broken display from the ground.

“Would you mind driving me to the grocery store? I don’t have my car yet”, you ask after some minutes of silence. He takes a look at his watch. “Well, I have thirty minutes until my shift begins, if you do it quick, then I can drive y-”, he replies while still leaning against the wall. “good, thanks.”, you cut him off and make your way to his car.

…

You're leaned on the card and walk through the market. Your cart is already half full and you’re soon finished. Javi was walking behind you and the whole time his eyes were fixed on your ass, you could feel it.

And that’s why you couldn’t stop smirking. “Stop smirking so much, you’ll get wrinkles”, he chuckles and you make your way towards the checkout. “says the man who’s soon in his 40s”, you tease him back and he laughs.

How much you love his laugh…

When you walk to his car with him carrying your two full grocery bags, he takes a look at his watch again and you hear him cuss in Spanish. “I’m already ten minutes late..”, Javier hisses.

“Oh, I’ll walk the rest. My apartment is not far from here and I have to get my cellphone repaired anyway.”, you say, wanting to take the bags from his hands. “I won’t let you walk home alone on these streets, especially if it’s getting dark.”, he says serious, not handing you over the bags. “I can defend myself, it’s fine. Go to work”, you mumble more seriously and grab your bags, ripping them out of his grip.

“When something happens to you-“, you cut him off. “Go to work”, you shout and make your way on the other side of the street.

You hear him cuss in Spanish behind you and just chuckle. You changed in many ways after one year, but one thing always stayed the same.

Your obstinacy, confidence and trust in your skills.

“maybe if you hadn’t been busy with staring at my ass, you would’ve checked the time earlier.”, you shout with a cheeky smile to him as he goes into his car. You chuckle and hear him drive away.

You know when the whole case about Pablo Escobar wasn’t so serious, you know he would’ve driven you home, but unfortunately it was.

It was getting dark and you made your way to a electronic shop. After you talked with the man behind the counter, he told you, you can pick up your phone tomorrow.

When you got out of the store, it was dark outside and got kinda cold. You wanted to put on your cardigan, but notice that you forgot it in Javier’s car. “fuck..”, you mumble and continue walking with your grocery bags.

A group of men were walking next to you on the other side of the street, beginning to catcall you. You start to feel uncomfortable and walk a little quicker, ignoring them. They were continuing catcalling you, and being a woman, alone on a street while it’s fucking dark, is kind of scary.

But that’s life as a woman, I guess…, you think

But you pull yourself together and remind yourself of your confidence, knowing you would knock the fuck out of them. You were five minutes away from your apartment, but suddenly one of the men decided to switch sidewalks and walk to you.

“Buenas noches, hermosa. ¿Buscas alojamiento?”, he asks while walking next to you.

Someone else calling you hermosa, who’s not Javier, gives you the shivers.

Your Spanish wasn’t perfect, but you think he asked you if you have a place to sleep tonight or something.

You continued ignoring him, and he continues speaking to you, but now you didn’t understand shit… and to be honest, you didn’t want to understand it.

You could sense and smell he’s drunk. “Vete a la mierda”, you tell him to fuck off.

Suddenly he grabs your arm, and that was it. You let fall your grocery bags, grab his hand and kick him right into his balls. He couldn’t react fast enough because of the alcohol, so you also kicked him with your knee right into his face.

You hear a car coming nearer, but ignore it. As the guy lies on the ground, you punch him right in his face. You hear his mates being shocked. “You want too? Come here then!”, you shout challenging, but they didn’t thought twice and ran away.

You just scoff as you see them walking away and bending down to grab to pick up your groceries.

Suddenly, you feel a hand on your back. “Cariño, are you o-“, before your brain can process and recognise that it’s Javier’s voice, you punch him directly into his face. You hear him groan in pain and as you look up, you see his car. “Omg- I’m so sorry-“, you panic and take his hand into your face, looking at his bleeding nose. You take out a tissue of your shorts and hold it against his nose.

“I thought it was someone of these men-“, he cuts you off and takes the tissue himself. “You got a hell of a punch, you know that”, he says while holding the tissue at his nose.

A part of your brain starts thinking, he deserves it. For ignoring you for so long. You start to form s slight smirk on your lips, but then throw the thought away.

“What a secretary I am, huh?”, you chuckle and pick up your groceries. He stuffed the tissue into his nose and then helps you, getting all your groceries together and then lifting up your grocery bags.

“Don’t you have to work?”, you ask him confused because it was just 20 minutes ago when he left. “‘told Carrillo I forgot a folder at home, I can’t let a beautiful woman like you, walk home alone.”, he says while going to his car. “but I have to say, you handled the situation pretty well, he’s completely knocked out.”, he smirks and gets the grocery bags in his car.

As he called you beautiful, you blush slightly and take a seat in his car. “‘didn’t train for nothing, you know”, you giggle while he starts the engine and drives you home.

As you arrive after literally 2 minutes, you take your cardigan and get out of the car. “thank you for still looking for me”, you mumble and put the cardigan on.

“no problem… but I kind of deserved this punch, didn’t I?”, he sighs while you take your grocery bags.

Now you can’t hide your dirty smirk anymore.

“Yeah, you kind of did”, you answer and close his car door.

“‘wish you a good shift then, be careful”, you give him a smile and then walk to the building, getting out your keys. “see you tomorrow, hermosa”, he calls after you and as you walk through the door, you hear him drive off.

...

The next morning you finally got your car and could drive alone. Even if you enjoyed Javier’s as your driver. You get to the DEA station and walk to your office…

You see a sign with your name on your desk, and under it is written: secretary.

Yup, still hate that, you think and let out a loud sigh.

You take a seat on your chair and lean back. After a while some woman comes in and gives you some paperwork, and also a folder that you can catch up with everything. Even if the thought, that you normally could work in the DEA office to take down some of Pablo’s guys, makes you angry, you need to live with it for a while now. And then, you get started…

After some hours you hear a knock on your door. “Come in”, you say loud and as you look up who it is, you roll your eyes. “Agent Peña”, you call him while having the folder in the hand.

“‘The previous secretary was fired because being caught flirting, kissing and sleeping with one of the agents’”, you read out loud and then look up at him. “And who might that be huh?”, you ask serious while raising an eyebrow at him, knowing exactly who it probably was.

“Even if you won’t believe me now, it wasn’t me”, he answers and places a coffee on your desk. You raise your eyebrows at him. And he was right, you didn’t believe him.

But, why should you care? You’re not together or anything… but the thought of him fucking another women, makes you jealous… and kinda sad.

“you’re fucking all your secretaries now, Agent Peña?”, you ask cheeky while being leaned back in your chair. He just chuckles while shaking his head and places his hands on your desk, leaning against it.

“No, just you.”, he answers and you choke on your coffee because you took a sip.

“We’re definitely not fucking and I’m not your secretary.”, you say serious to make a point.

He takes a cigarette from his ear into his fingers and puts it between his lips, while making his way out of your office.

“Yeah, we’ll see about that in some weeks.”

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #ff #oneshot #pedro pascal fic #pedro x reader #pedro pascal fanfiction #smut #narcos #Javier peña #javier peña x reader #javier pena x reader #javier pena fanfiction #narcos fic #javier pena x you #javi p #narcos fanfic #reader #javi x reader #pedro pascal characters #fluff #narcos fluff #pedro pascal fluff #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x female reader #pedro pascal imagine #Joel Miller #Joel X Reader #tlou #tlou fans

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

03/10/24 OFMD Recap

TLDR; Cast & Crew Sightings; David Jenkins; Rhys Darby; Rosie Carnahan Darby; London Billboards; Mascot Jeff's Birthday; Adopt Our Crew Saturday Sillies; Fan Spotlight; Reminders! Wee John Wonday; Watch Parties; Kudoboards; Companies doing good things!; Fundraisers! Love Notes; Daily Darby/Tonight's Taika

Okay luvs, finally catching up. I'd love to do a much bigger appreciate day post so everyone can see all the cool stuff people posted but I'd like to get some permissions first, so I'll try to do that tomorrow or sometime this week!

== Cast & Crew Sightings ==

== David Jenkins ==

David just sharing some soothing music for being parked. Src: Dj's Insta

= Rhys Darby =

Out with the fam! Rhys' Instagram Story

Rosie was kind enough to give us another shot tonight:

= Rosie Carnahan Darby =

So I'm not going to post the tweet Rosie was responding too because that twat of a human being can rot, but I would like to highlight Rosie and her badassery and constant standing up for everyone. Just a damn fine human being that one. If you want to see who and what it was in response to, please visit Rosie's Twitter Page, but CW: TERF

== London Billboards Meetups! ==

Tomorrow's the day folks! First set of Billboards are up tomorrow! SRC: Tumblr / Instagram

== Jeff's Birthday! ==

== Adopt Our Crew Saturday Sillies ==

Our lovely friends at @adoptourcrew had more Saturday Sillies for us yesterday during the appreciation event on Twitter! Just copying them over here so yall with no twitter can play :) If you do have access to twitter, please play and interact with AdoptOurCrew on Twitter! If you don't have access to Twitter, check out the puzzles here.

== Fan Spotlight ==

= Positive Content by LCWebsXOXO =

Our dear crew-mate LCWebsXOXO (you may have seen her around helping with @saveofmdcrewmates as well as all over tumblr/twitter) is starting up a youtube channel this week dedicated to positive content! Looking for something to boost your spirits? She's here to help. Feel free to check out her Tiktok and Youtube.

= Cast Cards =

More cards from @melvisik! This time two of my favorite ladies, Selenis Leyva and Kristen Johnston!

== Reminders! ==

= Wee John Wondays =

Just a reminder! Tomorrow (as far as we know at the normal time) Con O'Neil and Gypsy Taylor will be joining Kristian Nairn on Wee John Wonday! 10.30 pm GMT / 6:30pm ET / 2:30pm PT

= Watch Parties =

== Wrecked ==

There are sources being passed around. If access is an issue, DM @iamadequate1 on Twitter or Tumblr

Season 2 watch from March 11th to March 15th. 

Season 3 watch from March 18th to March 22nd. 

Times will be 10pm GMT / 5pm EST / 4pm CST / 2pm PST. Watch two episodes per day. Episodes are 21-22 minutes each. Use the following Saturday for the tags/watch if interested but not able to make this time.

Hashtags: 

#WreckedPirates

#SaveOFMD

#RhysDarbyFaction

== Deutsche Nachrichten / German News ==

Twitter-Watch-Along von Our Flag Means Death:

Streamt Staffel 2 ab dem 15. März.

Samstag, 9.3. 17:00 Folgen 1 bis 3, 

Dienstag, 12.3. 20:00 Folgen 4 & 5, 

Mittwoch, 13.3. 20:00 Folgen 6 & 7, 

Donnerstag 14.3. 20:00 Folgen 8 & 9, 

Freitag, 15.3. 17:30 Folge 10

Und anschließend bingen wir zusammen Staffel 2! 

Schaut und tweetet mit! 

Hashtag:

 OurFlagRTL

== Kudoboard Reminders! ==

= Taika =

Kudoboard Link

The board will stay up until March 12th, and we will share the link with him on March 13th. The Kudoboard is monitored prior to approval to prevent trolls from jumping in (so if you don't see your additions right away, that's why!)

== Cast & Crew Kudoboards ==

In addition-- thank you to @sharpenyersword on Twitter for setting up ALL THE KUDOBOARDS! Rhys' birthday kudoboard will close on the 20th, the rest will close on the 22nd. There are more! I missed some the first time! Sorry all!

Go send the cast and crew some love folks!

Rhys Darby's Birthday

David Jenkins

Nathan Foad

Con O'Neill

Ruibo Qian

Leslie F*cking Jones!

Matthew Maher

Vico Ortiz

Samson Kayo

Alex "Ass Tonight" Sherman!

David Fane

Kristian "Wee John Wednesdays" Nairn!

Samba "BTS and Baking King" Schutte!

Fellow OFMD Fan Crew!

== Companies Doing Good Things! ==

While not OFMD specific, it's been called out that there are some wonderful things happening in regards to moms of our trans and non-binary siblings. Penzey's Spices is creating a Mother's Day catalog featuring moms of trans and non-binary kids!

You can check out more info here if you're interested!

== Fundraisers ==

= Our Flag makes a Difference =

Getting so much closer to the goal for eSIMs and Sanity Products of Gaza Fundraiser! It's up to 71% funded! Great job everyone!

= Team Haven Belfast Update! =

Almost at 20%!

== Love Notes ==

Hey lovelies. We're coming up on another week. It's only been a few days since Chaos Dad made the announcement, but I gotta say, it feels almost like a month. I been feeling it pretty hard, and I know so many of you have been struggling. We're all working through things in our own way, and in our own time, slowly but surely.

You really should be proud of yourselves. Look at you. Look at everything you've done in just a few days, hell in a couple months. The amount of people you've sent love to. The amount of lives you made better with a kudos/heart, or a kind word, or a message. None of us, no matter how well we know each other, know how much each of us is going through, and yet you still, throughout it all, put more love into the world. The world is such a better place with you, and your art, and your words, and your kindness, and you should be so incredibly proud of yourself. I know I'm proud of you. I know we're all so very proud of you. And you know what else? You're doing so much better than you think you are. These days especially, everything feels so much worse. Crappy things, compacting on crappy things, and then they try to take our solace away from us. But you know what? You're treading water, even if it feels like you're drowning, and sooner or later, you'll be able to swim again. Don't give up lovelies. We're all still here with you, and we're all so proud of you, and we all love you. Keep on sharing that beautiful spark of yours, it's catching, and it's making the world a much more beautifully bright place.

I hope the beginning of your week is kind to you <3 Sweet Dreams and Pleasant Days.

== Daily Darby / Today's Taika ==

Just some goofy finger action and smiles from these two. Darby Courtesy of @ofmd-ann Taika Courtesy of @parttimesarah

#daily ofmd recaps #daily ofmd recap #ofmd daily recap #ofmd daily recaps #ofmd #our flag means death #rhys darby #taika waititi #adopt our crew #saturday sillies #save ofmd crew #london billboard #david jenkins #rosie carnahan darby #kudoboard #fundraisers

[schemmentigfs]

Sweet Nothings.

paring: melissa schemmenti x reader.

warnings: none. Just pure fluffy.

summary: melissa whispers some sweet nothings while you sleep. 💌

notes: this was my first time writing something in english, so I apologize for any mistakes, I hope you enjoy <3 and feel comfortable to send me requests for more Melissa fics!

As she unlocked the door, Melissa sighed. "Finally at home. I couldn't take it anymore."

That Saturday, Ava planned a game night with the rest of the Abbott crew. At first the redhead was hesitant to go as all she wanted was to spend time with you since both of you hadn't seen each other all week.

However, you managed to convince her to go, knowing that no matter how much your girlfriend complained, she loved spending time with her friends.

"Are you sure you don't want to come with me, Tesoro? " Melissa asked before leaving.

"Wish I could, but unfortunately I have to keep working. Again." You said rolling your eyes.

As much as you were happy to be working from home, you couldn't deny that sometimes you felt exhausted from too many tasks. And Melissa knew this and did her best to make sure you got as much rest as possible.

"Hon, when you're done try to get some rest, okay? Remember that the most important thing is your well-being." She said as she hugged you tightly.

[...]

"Babe?" Melissa said as she climbed the stairs looking for you.

As she walked towards the bedroom, the older woman let out a small smile as she found you sleeping peacefully on the bed.

Before joining you in bed, she took the opportunity to take a quick shower and change her clothes. Melissa put on an old Nirvana t-shirt, a piece she stole from you at the beginning of your relationship.

"Dolcezza Mia, are you awake?" Melissa asked softly as she settled into the bed next to you, waiting for an answer. "No? good, you deserve some rest. I know how work is really exhausting for you sometimes."

She wrapped her arms around your waist, sighing passionately.

"The game night was pretty good actually, Ava was gossiping about her neighbors, Jacob kept talking about the new episode of his favorite podcast, Barb and I had a karaoke competition and Janine and Gregory showed us this new Lego set. And speaking of these two, can you believe that they are finally dating? Seriously, I thought they would never admit their feelings for each other." Melissa chuckled softly.

"I had a lot of fun but I couldn't wait to get home and stay with you, sweetheart."

She felt you settle into her.

"Sei così bella. Sono così fortunato ad averti. I love everything about you. How you are always kind, loving and optimistic about things." Melissa whispered. "Everyday...as soon as I get off from work I try to get home as fast as I can. Because that feeling when I open the door and you run to me and you jump into my arms, is so sweet. It erases all my bad thoughts from the day."

Melissa leaned over to give you a kiss on the cheek, accidentally waking you up.

"Lissa? Is that you?" You asked in a sleepy voice, turning to face her.

"Sorry hon, I didn't mean to wake you up with the kiss on your cheek, I just was-"

You laughed when you noticed your girlfriend was blushing. God, she was so precious.

"It's okay." You said, leaning over to kiss her.

"Did you manage to rest?" Melissa asked changing the subject. Trying to hide how shy she was at that moment.

"Yes! quite a lot to be honest. But you know, I also couldn't wait for you to come home and kiss me."

The redhead didn't respond, just let out a small laugh, while looking at you with heart eyes.

"What?" you asked smiling.

"I love you. Tu sei l'amore della mia vita e sarò tua per sempre." She said before pulling you into a desperate kiss.

<3

Sei così bella. Sono così fortunato ad averti. = You are so adorable, I'm so lucky to have you.

Tu sei l'amore della mia vita e sarò tua per sempre = You are the love of my life and I will be yours forever.

#melissa schemmenti x reader #Spotify #i love her #lisa ann walter #melissa schemmenti x you #abbott elementary #abbott elementary fanfiction

[banquetwriter]

Please do a part 2 to the Johnnie fix u just posted !

୨୧ Cinnamon pt:2 ୨୧

pairing: Johnnie Guilbert ♡︎ Reader

warnings: ୭̥⋆*｡

summary: ʚ A part two to cinnamon ɞ

Words: 1034

An: this was in reference to: cinnamon go check it out since this is part two! This turned out so bad I'm so sorry. I never wanted to make a part two to this so I'm a lil upset lol

It was the day after the party, you weren't too hungover by any means, just a little sick feeling in the morning but that had passed hours ago. You had also left the party early deciding it wasn't fair to torture yourself with Johnnie all night long.

You were taking a slow sip of your drink and scrolling around Pinterest when an Instagram DM from Johnnie popped up on your phone. Your eyebrow shot up tapping the notification.

J: ‘Hey, you left that party quickly last night. Sure you're doing ok?’

You smiled briefly at his message. You set your drink down while sitting up to reply.

‘Haha yeah I’m all good just got a little overwhelmed that's all :)’

You sent your message and decided to put your phone down. You didn't want to wait around for his reply, that was only going to cause you to get even more attached to someone who didn't like you. You turned the TV on and put on one of your favorite shows.

You say most of an episode is for caving and checking for a text back. Sure enough, that was a notification from the world's favorite emo boy. You tap on it unlocking your phone.

J: ‘oh ok. I'm always here if you need to talk or anything like that. Can I ask what made you so overwhelmed?’ he asked. You felt that familiar heartbeat increase as you re-read his message over and over again.

‘It was just someone I didn't wanna be around for that long. It wasn't in a bad way, I just needed a break from someone.’ you replied. You Weren't sure why you couldn't just lie to him but you couldn't.

You hoped he would take your words and leave you be, but as fate would have it… he doesn't. J: ‘Was it me?’ he asks. You're not sure how to respond, you suppose it would be time to talk this out as the opportunity presented itself.

‘We can talk sometime in person, ok? Are you free at all this week?’ you sent back, anxiety creeping its way through your whole body in waves. This wasn't right. We shouldn't meet.

Was there a possibility that Johnnie actually liked you? No. Right? You Weren't sure at this point. People who like someone check in on them. Maybe he DID like you just not how you want him to.

Your heart nearly exploded when you heard another text go through. J: ‘Im free today’ your heart was pounding so fast. Would you even have the courage to meet today in the first place.

It's better to get the bandage ripped off sooner than later. ‘Works for me lets get dinner?’ you sent the message feeling like you were going to vomit. You wanted to get all ready for him, look your best.

But you knew you shouldn't do that. He needed this from you at your most true self. Sweatpants and all. He agreed and you both arranged plans to meet in only four hours.

Four hours is a lot of time to wait for something but it felt even longer as you checked the clock every five minutes to see if it was time or not. But after all your waiting it was finally time to leave.

You pulled up to this place and Johnnie was already standing outside. You both shuffle around each other awkwardly for a moment before you tell him to sit down. You choose a spot outside and sit down.

The wind blows on both of you as it chills you to the bone. “So I did leave because of you but, that sounds so scary and mean.” you start. He just stared at you for a moment “ok.” was all he said, his voice wavering.

“It's because I really like you. And I know this sounds immature and silly but when you didn't talk to me at the party I felt so alone. I thought you might have liked me too and I don't know. I just needed to leave after you gave me water.” you confessed to him.

It all felt so silly now. Leaving a party because a boy didn't like you. He doesn't say anything and again your instinct is to just run, as fast and as far as you can. Johnnie doesn't let that happen this time.

As soon as you stand up his arm reaches out for you. You stop at his contact. “Y/n I definitely like you, don't worry,” he said as you slowly sat back down. You hold his eyes before eventually feeling the feeling of shame creep back in.

“Sorry,” you mumble slowly. “I thought you left because I made you uncomfortable or something,” he said, the wind blowing again. Your heart was soaring at his words. “No, I was just high and overwhelmed,” you said looking down at his hand that was still holding your arm.

“Oh right. Well, I definitely like you, I don't talk to people I don't like this much,” he said, causing both of you to giggle slightly. “I'm sorry for the way I reacted. I just got so scared,” you said through a pitiful laugh.

“It's ok we all get scared of something. I just can't ever imagine someone like you liking someone like me,” he said rubbing the back of his neck. “What do you mean? You're so fucking funny and nice Johnnie of course I like you,” you say with a smile.

“Thanks but I don't believe you. It's just that you're so funny, smart, and… pretty. I don't know how I can compare.” he said looking down. “Johnnie, that's how I feel about you,” you said leaning towards him.

“We should hang out sometime,” he said, unfortunately removing his hand from your arm to fix his hair. “We’re hanging out right now,” you said, tilting your head slightly. “No, I mean like on a date?” he says looking up at you through his hair. “You wanna take me on a date?” you whisper leaning further towards him.

“Y-yes we should go on a date,” he said again, adjusting his hair. “Ok let's go on a date then.”

“OK?”

“Ok.”

#johnnie x you #johnnie #johnnie guilbert angst #jake and johnnie #johnnie x reader #johnnie guilbert fluff #johnnie guilbert x you #johnnie guilbert x reader #johnnie guilbert

[the-lost-girl-in-the-tardis]

A chance meeting.

(Aka I'm bored and messing about with ideas.)

The ninth Doctor.

Weeping Angels:

The bookshop is quiet this late in the day. Just shy of an hour before closing. Some patrons are muttering amongst themselves. Sometime to you to make their final purchases. Others begin to wrap up whatever they were doing on computers and laptops.

You hum to yourself as you check in books. Stacking them in the rolling cart to later be shelved. The dimly lit room is bathed in the red light of the setting sun. There is a comfortable warmth in the air. The last remainder of a warm summer day.

After a while you stand. Popping your back after having sat down in one spot for so long. You began directing the customers out. Wishing the regulars a good evening as they leave.

When the door bell chimes one last time you sigh. Flipping the open sign to close as you locked the door.

Silence. Save for the distant rumbling of cars and the howling dog.

You still had to clean up. Gathering bits of trash from people who couldn't see the clearly labeled trash can. You stacked coffee filters back up. Open a new container of tea. Made a note to buy more syrups and more creamer.

You began to hum to yourself again. Half mumbling the words to the Beatles Blackbirds as you swept.

"Take these broken wings and-" Youpaused. Your broom had hit something solid behind the curtain. The yellow straw curled around stone grey feet. You laid the broom against the wall.

Your fingers met the sun bleached blue curtains you hadn't remembered closing. Having opened up all the curtains and windows to let in a breeze. The bookshops ac had broken a week ago and David still hadn't found someone to fix it.

"What are you?" The words left you in a mumble. The curtain rings scrapped against the metal curtain rod when you drew the fabric back. What sat before you was an angel esque statue. It's hands were over its eyes.

Something about it felt off. An age old instinct inside you yelled. Raged against your new age brain. You reached your hand out despite this. Grazing your fingers against the back of the hand of the eerily warm statue. You shivered. Swallowed thickly.

With your hands now on your hips you huffed. Tutting your tongue as your grumbled. "David and his weird decor choices." No doubt he had hid the damn thing behind the curtain to spook you. It wouldn't be the first time and it certainly wouldn't be the last.

You reached for the broom. Shivering as a soft breeze blew through the open window behind the statue.

It would just be your luck that you had to sneeze in that moment. Having forgotten to take you allergy pills that morning.

As you were wiping your nose with your handkerchief you just happened to glance up. Only to let out a curse and stumble back into an old bean bag. The statue had moved. Honest to god moved.

You shot to your feet. Eyes not moving from the statue as you walked backwards.

"Acho!" You and your luck. Maybe that's why you never won the lottery. The statue had moved again. A table sat between the two of you. The statue was grinning. Arm outstretched. Reaching towards you. You were close to panic. Hands shaking and palms sweating. You were cold despite the summer warmth.

You curse again when the lights began to flicker. A few bulbs in the children's section actually busting. Loud pops of glass had you flinching.

"I don't know what you are." You spoke. Reaching for a book left on the table. "But i'm not going to be that person who gets got in the first few minutes of a supernatural episode."

The book arced in the air. Smacking against the against the angel uselessly. The pages fluttered. Flew like confetti as the book exploded. More lights pooped. Slowly making its way towards the two of you.

You got the feeling that this thing liked your fear.

You began backing up again. Hands flailing behind you to guide your way. More lights burst. You hand meets the cold brass doorknob. You pushed the button to unlock it.

Nothing.

You tried again.

Nothing.

You jumped when you heard the whirring on the other side. Then the muttering of a man. Stupidly you looked away. Only to scream when the angel was right in front of you.

The door opened with a too cheerful "Ding!" And you fell into the arms of a man. The smell of leather heavy in your lungs.

"Hello!" The man spoke. His voice was accented.

"Hi." You spoke out quickly. Voice high with panic. Eyes still on the angel inside the book shop even as the man helped you to your feet. "You uh. You wouldn't happen to know what that thing is would you?" The man slammed the door closed and you got a proper look at him.

Leather jacket. Red shirt. Dark jeans. And a weird glowing pen in his hands. The sound of the whirring earlier obviously as he waved it around the door.

"That was a weeping angel. Quit lucky you." He pointed his pen at you before pocketing it. "I'm the Doctor by the way." He grinned.

"Y/n." You drew your name out as you spoke. A little more than confused. Both of you jumped when the door began to rattle.

"This is the part where we run. Come on!" The man, The Doctor. You'd ask Doctor who later. As it was it grabbed you hand and pulled. Leading you down the street as the world began to plunge into the night.

The Tenth Doctor:

Alien Invasion :

You had been painting when it happened. Sat out in an open meadow. Canvas only half filled. You wondered sometimes if it was still there. A burst of color in your otherwise greyed world.

The aliens had come without warning. Nothing save for the breaking of the atmosphere as their ships descended down to Earth.

You hadn't bothered to gather your things. Only turning and running before the behemoth of a creature could spot you.

Your truck had died over halfway through on the drive back. You later learned it was caused by an emp blast from the aliens. And so you ran.

It was late by the time you had gotten home. Both in the day and...

Still you could not think of it. Lest you make it more real. More tangible.

You chose to believe that they were ok despite the rumours surrounding the labour camps. You had been one of the few. The only who were outside those camps. The alien cities. Everyday was a fight for survival. Both against them and your fellow human.

As of right now though the squabbles have settled. At least amongst each other. Instead all of that fight was focused on one man who stood in the center of the room. Dimly illuminated by old oil lamps.

He called himself the Doctor and asked how he could get into the heart of The Capitol. The Aliens main base. A place that promised nothing but death.

"I have a friend there. Donna Noble. I need to get her out." There was a series of scoffs. Laughter. And uproar.

"Ya. You and everyone else here mate." A dark haired man spoke. You never bothered to learn his name. Or any others. To many people to lose to get attached. You had lost enough already.

You watched from your little corner in the room. Eyes fixated on the man as he tried to reason with someone. Any one in the room. There was something about him. They way he carried himself. When he circled his trenchcoat curled around his long legs. Brown eyes were darkened in the dim lighting. His lips were bit raw with worry. His shoulders tense.

"Please. Your the last group of people." Someone cut him off. The Doctor blew air out from his cheeks. Brows furrowed. He scowled. A type of anger you had never seen before flashed across his face. His mouth opened. Lips curled around teeth.

Until you stepped forward.

"I'll help." You told him. It wasn't some loud affair when you spoke. Quite the opposite. Your voice was quiet. Hoarse from lack of use. And when you moved closer to him Dian pulled at your sleeve. You shook her off. "I'll help." You spoke again. Wanting to clear away that look of disbelief from his face.

If it had been your family there. You would want help to.

.............

You were glad that you had helped him. Watching him interact with his friend. Donna had thanked you as well when it all settled down. At least now humankind will be able to re-build. Because of the Doctors efforts the Aliens had been driven away. Catapulted back into the skies where they had come from.

You had never met a man before that could instill so much fear with his name alone.

That left you here. Sitting well away from everyone as you sketched for the first time in a long time. Some skill had been left behind but the rest was still there.

You drew them. Happy. Smiling.

It hurt your very soul. Broke your heart. Even after all of this you still couldn't find them. And you had no one else to lean upon.

The pages darkened and his voice sounded in your ears. As did the sweet perfume you had first smelled as Donna sat beside you.

"What about you y/n? What are you going to do know that the earth is saved." You said nothing at the Doctors words. Merely shrugging your shoulders and closing the sketchbook before they could see what. Who you drew.

"Same thing I have been." You spoke quietly. Not looking at either of them as you looked over what had once been the Aliens Capitol. "Traveling. Moving." Alone.

You could see Donna look up at the Doctor from the corner of your eye. Such a kind and worried look on her face.

Then the Doctors hand on your shoulder. You look to see his face near yours as he bent down.

"Then how about traveling the universe? The stars? Lots more to draw than what's out here."

The Eleventh Doctor:

Crash Landing:

You are walking along the old graveled road to your home. Rocks crumbling underfoot as you go up the familiar trail. It's one you've taken for years now.

The air was cool and crisp. Sweet in your lungs as you breathed it in. In the distance you could hear the croaking of frogs. The chirping crickets. Here and there there was an owl. The sounds were comforting. Familiar.

Something was different about this walk though. Just. Have you ever walked into a room and it just felt different? Only to later learn that your friends or siblings had moved all the furniture a few inches to the left? That's what it felt like right now. That everything that you have seen for the last 15 years was moved a little to the left.

You took a step. Then paused. Ears straining to hear what you are no longer hearing.

The woods around you have fallen silent. No frogs, crickets. Nothing but the wind winding through the trees and the soft lapping of water on the shore from a nearby lake.

You turned on foot. Hand held light briefly lighting up the road, then the trees as you moved. You glanced up and into the sky. The moon was full and round. Almost bright enough that you didn't need the flashlight.

The air blew softly. Picking up with it the scent of wild flowers. It curled around you. Blowing around strands of hair and fluttering your open jacket.

You swallow thickly. Nervous. That was a new feeling on this road. This walk. Nervous. As if something was about to happen.

You stood on the spot for a few minutes. Eyes glancing about as you tried to find something tangible for this feeling. You drew in a breath. Held it. Then let it out.

!VAWHOMP!

You screamed when it came crashing through. It flung up wet earth and rock. Broke trees and it screamed. Yelled. A large blue box crashing and spinning into the Earth.

It landed some feet away and all you could do was close to hyperventilate. You body shook and your heart threatened to break your ribs with its rapid pounding.

The air was thick with the smell of freshly turned earth and wood. Normally it was comforting but.

The box made a noise.

"I... What?" You bag fell to the ground as you began to move. You almost fell into the trench it had made twice before you reached it.

The box made a wheeze.

You hand was on its side before you could think. Fingers running along the rough wood.

Curiosity got the better of you.

With some difficulty you clambered up on it. Skinning your knee in the process. After about a minute and some cursing and grumbling your were on it.

Police Call Box.

What was that?

Was that a door handle? It felt warm when you wrapped your hand around it. Pushing in did nothing. Pulling up on the other hand.

Smoke bellowed out when you opened it. It was thick and reeked of burnt motor oil. The door squealed on its hinges as it flopped to the other side. A bright light filtered through that smoke and for a moment you hoped that whatever you just breathed in wasn't toxic or radioactive.

Instead your lungs burned and you coughed. Hacking like that one time you had stupidly tried a cigarette when you were young. You waved a hand in front of your face trying to clear away some of the smoke. When it finally stopped bellowing out in thick clouds you stuck your head over the opening.

"How on gods green earth." You mumbled and leaned forward some more. Up an on your knees with your hands on the other side of the door way to brace you.

At a sideways view was the stranges thing you had ever seen. Some type of console you assumed a was in the center. Leading up to it was a walkway. At the end of the walkway was a man in a white shirt and suspenders. His face must have matched your own.

"How do you fit all of that in here?" The man shook his head. He was leaning on the consol thing. Rope in hand. He was coughing heavily every so often.

"How did you get up there?" He questioned back. You shrugged your shoulders.

"If you throw the rope I can catch it? There's a log out here I can tie it to." You offered. Questions can come later. And did you have a lot of them now.

#doctor who fanfiction #eleventh doctor #tenth doctor #ninth doctor #eleventh doctor x reader #tenth doctor x reader #ninth doctor x reader

[astoundingbeyondbelief]

Kaiju Week in Review (January 7-13, 2024)

Hard to talk about the Monarch: Legacy of Monsters finale without spoilers, so if you haven't watched it yet, skip ahead to the next item. No flashbacks this time (time dilation aside), just our surviving heroes finally all on the same page to solve a seemingly impossible problem. The momentous reunion between Lee and Keiko got the space it deserved, although I was a touch disappointed that the obvious budding romance between Cate and May got shortchanged. And of course we finally got our first kaiju fight of the series, with Godzilla dispatching the Ion Dragon in a quick but ferocious battle. Fun to see this version of the character take on a low-stakes, low-power challenger for a change. I am routinely frustrated by TV seasons ending on cliffhangers (some of which are then never resolved), but they managed to conclude this season's storyline while setting up the next one, should they have the chance to tell it. Good to have some payoff to the Apex episode earlier in the series. I'm wondering if the series is planning to pivot to Kong now. Since Godzilla: King of the Monsters still hasn't happened yet, the Big G still can't make any public appearances without breaking continuity, which is quite the writing complication.

@bog-o-bones has blessed us with an excellent feature-length video essay on the history of the kaiju genre. Even for a walking encyclopedia like me, it was fun to have it all laid out so cleanly—the way the three genre pillars of Godzilla, Gamera, and Ultraman rise and fall in popularity, never entirely in sync and consequently keeping us steadily entertained over the decades. So many narratives about the genre in print are decades out of date and/or act like barely anything past the sixties was worth making. This one's up-to-the-minute and gives the seismic influence of films like Cloverfield and Pacific Rim their due. I have my quibbles (last-minute re-records accidentally omitted GAMERA -Rebirth-; the original Mothra deserved more attention), but I acknowledge the amount of works covered here is staggering and every fan would tell this story a little bit differently. Highly recommended.

IDW's biggest Godzilla comic ever is coming in May, a one-shot anthology called Godzilla: 70th Anniversary. It'll have nine stories over 100 pages, with the writers including Joëlle Jones, Michael W. Conrad, Matt Frank, James Stokoe, Adam Gorham, and Dan DiDio. (Some of these folks will presumably be illustrating their comics as well.) The solicitation doesn't offer many plot hints, given that scope: "From the American Old West to modern Tokyo and beyond, this collection features stories of the King of the Monsters fighting with its allies like Mothra, against old enemies like the terrible Mechagodzilla, and reshaping the lives of all who fall in its path!" I'm surprised they're not waiting until November—hopefully it doesn't get delayed into November.

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire will now release in the U.S. two weeks early—March 29. It's taking the place of Bong Joon-ho's Mickey 17, which is now undated. I can hardly complain about being able to see it earlier, though the move comes with some risk, as it's now opening the week after Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire.

SRS Cinema has opened preorders for their Yuzo the Biggest Battle in Tokyo Blu-ray. Or is it Yuzo: The Biggest Battle on Tokyo? That's what the product page says, but on the cover the title's unchanged. Oh, SRS. Anyway, bonus features are scant: just trailers and something called "A Brief Introduction To Ishii Yoshikazu."

Here's the teaser trailer for Volcanodon, a short film from Taiwan's Creator Union of Tokusatsu. They're aiming to have it uploaded to YouTube sometime this year, and I'll happily watch it. Obviously low-budget, but it's well-shot and it's nice to see a kaiju movie outside of Japan go all-in on practical effects.

#kaiju week in review #kaiju #godzilla #monarch legacy of monsters #volcanodon #yuzo the biggest battle in tokyo #godzilla x kong the new empire #idw

[moaserendipity]

My Top 10 BL's of 2023

I am back with my personal top 10 of 2023. I know I've been super quiet these days but making a top 10 is always fun to do. The #1 has been decided early this past year but for the rest... It was a crazy year for BL but only a few were really top tier...🔥🔥

10. My Personal Weatherman (Taikan Yoho)

One of the Japanese BL's I really enjoyed watching. It was more grown up then the ones I've seen and that was very welcome. I love the dynamics between the main characters a lot. It was a bit of a slow one, with the lack in communication between the two but I forgive that because the chemistry was really good.

09. Wedding Plan

Oh how i looked forward to this one, the second I saw the trailer. I loved the storyline but I thought it was very short, which made them rush through it at times, which was a shame because it was actually really good and I just wanted to see more. I loved the chemistry between Sailom and Namnuea, So I really enjoyed watching them. They are very new if I'm correct but I didn't notice it at all, so hopefully they will get another BL together but a longer one. Also I love the GL in this BL, it was very natural and I in the end hoped they would be the ones that got to marry. Not to forget about the cameo;s of my babies Payu and Rain and of course Prapai and Sky.

08. Moonlight Chicken

This one I've waited for so so long and it was kind of a surprise because I love EarthMix, Like Mix is my man but my attention got taken away from them and got attached to GemFourth who played Li Ming and Heart. I just loved everything about them! I loved how they incorporated Sign language because Heart was deaf and just the overall chemistry between them, was everything. They made me smile so much. Jim and Wen, you know were amazing as well but I sometimes felt frustrated by their interaction. The close moments they had were amazing of course but it was not what I expected from EarthMix but overall this drama was definitely worth the wait!

07. Kiseki: Dear to Me

I absolutely loved this one. I couldn't get enough of it. I am a sucker for the Hate to Love trope and this had exactly that and in a gangster way. Like I loved it. ZeRui and Bangyi were made for each other and you can't tell me otherwise how he went to prison for ZeRui and even got hurt but he still decided to dedicate his bakery to him with his Strawberry cakes, ugh too cute. The second couple made me want even more. The sassiness of Ai Di and the coldness of Chen Yi, they were really something. The way Chen Yi didn't realize that Ai Di loved him until he went to prison or that one hot night made me slap my forehead because nothing was more obvious, so I can not explain how happy I was they finally got together in the end!!

06. My School President

This really was a GemFourth year because this was their first leading BL and boy how they won us over with their cuteness. The OST was also seriously top tier. I think I loved all the songs. This entire Cast was amazing! To think I almost skipped this one...That would've been a mistake for sure, so I'm happy that I decided to give it another try because I fell in love with them and bingewatched it in one go. I can't wait to see the next project from them.!

5. Our Dating Sim

this Korean BL was a welcome one. I loved the office setting of this BL and the fact that the episodes were short as usual, didn't disturb me that much. Their chemistry made up for that! I will never forget how my heart sank when Ki Tae thought Wan had disappeared again, this poor man but I loved how Wan immediately comforted him the second he saw him. I should really rewatch this again.

4. Last Twilight

I know it's still running but I can not leave it out of my top10 for 2023. I am impressed with Jimmy and Sea. These two are everything to me at this moment. Their chemistry is crazy and I am happy they have this BL to show their talents again. I am impatiently waiting every week for the next episode and so far no episode has disappointed me, which is rare tbh.

3. Sing my Crush

Sing my crush was not even on my radar but the second I came across it, I bingewatched it. I am a sucker for music BL's, where the actors can ACTUALLY sing and play instruments.. I loved it so much. from start to finish. I really think this BL was very underrated. I did not hear a lot of people about it but it definitely deserves more!

2. I feel you linger in the Air

Ever since I saw the trailer, I wanted to see this one badly and boy did it not disappoint! I was in awe every episode. I don't think I've ever seen a Thai Bl that was staged in the past. Also this way of time traveling is one I actually like. As long as no bodies get switched I am loving it. Their chemistry was top notch and those intimate scenes. That kiss in the rain, Art I am telling you and that massage scene, HELLO!! I literally forgot to breathe at that point and my face was almost stuck to the screen, crazy!! So yeah this was a true masterpiece!

01. The Eighth Sense

Let's all act surprised by this one...... what can I say? This one touched my intire being. It touched my soul, My heart everything. I cried, laughed and even cursed at 2 people in particular.. This is the biggest masterpiece of 2023 and nothing can change my mind about this. The way I anticipated every week and felt sad when it ended, ugh!! I just want to praise Oh Jun Taek for the way he acted, because if I'm correct this was his first acting job or at least he is very new but he pulled it of perfectly and Ji sub, I am applauding him for the way he portrayed Jae Won. All I need now is a season 2 or an special episode where we see them do the things Jihyun wanted... like just please!! In al seriousness everything was amazing about this one and that's why it's my number 1

I really do think that the Korean BL's won this round. I feel like they are finally stepping up their game. It's still not as Explicit as Thai or Taiwanese but that's not what I am expecting. I don't always have to have NC scenes because without a story, it's not worth a lot. Overal the Bl's were powerful this year and Top tier. Hopefully next year will bring us even better ones!! <3

#my top 10 BL #the eighth sense #i feel you linger in the air #our dating sim #last twilight #sing my crush #my school president #moonlight chicken #my weatherman #kiseki: dear to me #wedding plan #wedding plan the series #jisub x juntaek #jimmysea #gemfourth #earthmix

[popculturebuffet]

Thomas the Tank Engine Retrospective: Shining Time Station 4-Pack: All Hail Schemer (Commission for Lachey V)

Hello all you happy schemer's and welcome back to my seemingly bottomless Thomas the Tank Engine Retrospective. This month my mounting workload means we're doubling up as we approach the season finale of sorts for this retrospective, Thomas's first and so far only theatrical film, Thomas and the Magic Railroad.

Before we can do that though, I needed a crash course on a bit of Thomas lore I hadn't touched. So it's my utmost pleasure to introduce, reintroduce or just plane fling at you Shining Time Station. Shining Time Station was the Britt Alcroft companie's way of putting Thomas The Tank Engine in the US at first. While the show was a great kids show and merchandise machine, it had one problem: each ep was 5 minutes at most and while this wasn't a remote problem for the booming home video market, putting it on tv was tricky. While UK tv stations were more than happy to either make 15 minute block of a few episodes or air it between shows, US stations at the time really didn't like carving up their air time like that. Simplier times.

Hence shining time station, a whole ass live action show featuring puppets, live action music videos, and wraparounds. Shining Time follows a bunch of interchangable kids: White BLonde Kid, future Sapphire Erica Luttrel, and other one as they mill around a train station learning life lesssons. Around the station are Stacey(Didi Cohn) , the station's manager, Billy Two-Feathers (Tom Jackson) , who runs the workshop, and Mr. Conductor, the tiny man who lives inside the station. If that sounds jarring it absolutely is as I assumed when I heard about the character he was a regular conductor who simply had magical powers. Still a little weird but like... not as jarring as when you see a Tiny George Carlin. For the record, and I missed this on first watch, the other two adults are aware of him to the point it feels like Mr. C is watching the kids half the time so the other adults can do their jobs. And i'm okay with this as there are so many kids shows where they hide the magic and I assumed this is one. I prefer it that the adults just know, smile along with it and let the tiny magic man help pick up the slack. Mr Conductor was played by Ringo Starr in the first season but since we were only doing a small selction of episodes, Lachey decided

For constancy since a chunk of the cast changes between seasons 1 and 2, and because Season 1 apparently has an ongoing story. So instead George Carlin is our tiny magic man for this special.

Of course there's one other regular in the station who deserved his own section, a man above men. A god above god. A schemer above schemers. The Robbie Rotten of the 90's I present to you HORACE MOTHERFUCKING SCHEMER.

Scheme is a schyster who runs a small Penny arcade over in the corner. WHy he's running an old timey style arcade in the 1980s I don't know but his real passion is various scams of the week, sometimes recurting the kids and eating every inch of scenery while making every minute he's on screen a joy. He's played by Brian O Conner, is somehow not in the movie, and is the best thing that's ever existed. All hail our new god.

Anyways since Shining Time Station is important to the film, we're taking a look at 4 episodes of Lachey's Choice from seasons 2 and 3: Win Loose or Draw, Sweet and Sour, Do I hear and Billy's Party. So join me for train station antics, drawing contests, talking pianos, child explotation, elvis, crooked auctions, and thanksgiving under the cut.

Win Lose or Draw

My first episode.. and going in pretty much blind aside from "this show is a vehicle for Thomas the tank engine". So the werid shit in this series.. caught me off guard as the episode starts with a pretty simple kids show teaching a lesson predicament: the local wise old man from the general store, who I assumed would be more important but is only in one of these 4 episodes, drops off art suplies for a contest and other girl is bummed that Erica Luttrel is better than her at art. We also meet Schemer whose mad the kids are getting paper everywhere and not spending money on his old timey arcade. Is.. is Schemer a time lord? Is he our time lord and savior? This series apparently takes place in the present, but has a penny arcade. Maybe shining times' just really old. Maybe i'm just really old and this series is old even for me, it's only.. four years older than me.

Okay moving past the exestial dread, point is Schemer is great and even off to the side for this one he's a lot of fun.

So Other Girl gets a visit from the Conductor.. who as a refresher is super tiny. Yeah I meant what I said about it being jarring: I had NO idea the Conductor was tiny sized in our world. Once you get used to it it's not that weird: he can travel to other dimensions his size and thus is the size of one of the people in thomas' world, hence how he can tell their stories. Makes sense. But suddenly being ambushed with a tiny george left me asking

Now I get he's just a tiny magic man who lives in the station and watches over these kids alongside the other two main adults and who said adults know exists and are cool with it. And honestly i'd be cool with having George Carlin hang around and despense advice to children too. Who wouldn't. It's like Thomas, it's weird at first but then you just embrace how weird this is and move on.

I do like HOW mr conductor is used. Carlin is clearly having a ball and is a shockingly fantastic children's entertainer, not just good at narrating the thomas segments but at interacting with the child actors and feeling truly like some otherworldly pixie train conductor man. He's really good at this and it's fun to watch.

As for the Thomas segments .. I won't be covering MOST of them again. I didn't skip them as Lachey made the valid point that while I had seen these eps, I hadn't seen them with the george carlin narration. George is really good at the job, easily equiling Michael over in the UK.

It's just.. i've covered these stories. WIth the exception of the one for our final episode today, there's no big diffrence story wise and performance wise Carlin also does the "everyone but Gordon gets about the same voice" thing the other narrators pre baldwin did. Harold also gets an upper class rich person voice

It is nice to get confrmation that Carlin was really good at both jobs, and it was a neat treat.. but there's just nothing really new to add here. The shorts featured are good. There's only one exception, a really weird one, and we're saving that for last. So good shorts as they were before, simply don't have anything new to add for the Carlin Cuts.

So Other Girl asks George Carlin to use his magical powers to help her win the art contest.

What I like though is that the lesson isn't the usual "Oh you shouldn't cheat in competition" aseop. it's a valid one but most kids shows across demographics have done it. Fairly Odd Parents even has it as one of Da Rules.

The real lesson is "it's more fufilling to work hard at something and get better yourself instead of comparing yourself to other people and how good they are". It's a lesson kids really need.. a lesson I honestly needed and maybe I would've kept drawing. You may never be as good as some but doing it is still fun. Just do your art and improvment for you and don't take easy shortcuts. The latter.. is super relevant given the rise of AI and people using it as a shortcut instead of a tool to help them create better work. It becomes about replacing other artists instead of helping artists grow.

Other girl isn't the only one to learn this lesson as one of the jukebox performers learned it. Oh did I mention there' sa jukebox full of magical puppets straight out of pee wee's playhouse who play a song once an episode? Because Lachey sure didn't

So yeah another jarring bit but one I like. I fucking love pee wee's playhouse, so seeing this old style of puppetry again warms my heart. The story is clever too: As a boy the puppet's band leader practiced piano but didn't feel good at it. Turned out the piano didn't and was also alive and thus played the songs for him. Eventually though the boy missed trying himself and the piano concided he was getting better. It's a heartwarming story about not letting sentient insturments play for you that's once again an accidental metaphor for AI somehow.

So she submits her picture instead and unsuprisingly this is what George Carlin hoped would happen. Erica Luttrel wins but they liked something about other girls so she wins a prize.

But enough about children what's SCHEMER been up to: Well he wanted to win, and Billy said his new ink was like magic so he just casually stole it.. only to accidently send a blank picture. We also get a great bit of schemer using a mirror to take a self portrait since no one wanted to draw his face less they summon another schemer into the world. such is the price of such one of a king beauty. Billy chases him and presumibly pummels him, episode over.

Sweet and Sour

So stop me if you've heard this one: a corrupt older man approaches a kid (or kids) with a lemonade stand, offers to be their partner, then finds ways to ruin the place while screwing their new partner over.

Yeah my thoughts exactly.. to my shock the Boondocks episdoe "The Block is Hot"... is a clear remake of the Shining Time Station Episode "Sweet and Sour". Or at least conceptually. After the partnership part both take diffrent paths: Ed Wuncler overworks poor jasmine and cons her parents, while Schemer brings in his nephew Schemee, whose just as hammy at half the size , such a great child actor I swear the two have perfect chemistry and he gets Brian O'Connor's manerisims down perfectly, who cuts production costs, lowers quality and generally ruins the place.

Yet weirdly despite the gaps in when they were made, medium and one being aimed at adults and the other at the childrenest of children, they BOTH have valid advice abotu the economy. For the Block Is Hot, it's how Corporations take advantage of people or buisnesses and will work people to death no matter the age to get as much profit as possible while convincing you their not. It's an episode I don't go back to often for a reason as , while incredibly good at this lesson it's VERY hard to watch, especailly since, resliastically, ed gets away with all of it.

In contrast, the kids learn the equally valuable lesson of not putting profits over quality: how people WILL suck up with bad quality stuff in a pinch once.. but will eventually choose something better.. if it's the same price but hey i'm not expecting a show amed at younger kids to be fully honest about how fucked economics are. I'm just impressed an episode from the early 90's packed that in.

BOth have the lesson of "don't quickly make a deal with someone for the wrong reasons'. For Jasmne she simply trusted the wrong person, something hard not to do and that the episode dosen't blame her for. For the kids.. they KNOW Schemer is bad and when he offers a partnership after seeing them sell cookies to a high class lady, their first reaction is

But they take the deal because he offers a lot of money.. and for once Schemer isn't lying: Schemee's methods do improve things. I also love these two together; Schemer is super supportive of his nephew, is proud when Schemee sells cookie sso bad hteir returned so they can sell them again (Sadly a tactic i'm sure has actually been used), and shows the kid genuine pride and affection I wasn't sure he was capable of showing anyone or anything that wasn't acitvely making him money. I mean he's happy to see him BEFORE he starts cutting corners like a shady man in a gloriously tacky suit.

They then learn the hard way they screwed up as not only ar ebilly and didi not impressed with their new lemonade and cookies, but when they try to complain Schmeer outright steals the buisness. Granted most buisnesses can't be stolen with a "no butts" clause, but Scheemer is dealing with small children not the ftc... this time.

My only beef with this episode is that while the lesson is good.. the adults blame the kids fo rbeing conned by schemer. They did screw up a bit as they knew he was trouble when he walked in, but did the deal anyway.. but loosing their buisness.. was him outright conning them. I get them learning a lesson but you still have to remember these are children IN your care you let be around scheemer unsupervised. And all George Carlin did was vaugely advise them the deal was bad and let them vent later. I get George Carlin can't talk to Scheemer as he dosen't know he exists, Lachey clarified that for me, and if he did he'd of course be constantly harassing the poor miniture george carlin or try to capture him to get his pot of gold. And look I know he's not a leprechaun, you know that, but it's fair to assume Schemer dosen't know his ass from his elbow let alone that george carlin isn't a leprechaun.. mostly because WE don't know that George Carlin, in this series, isn't a leprechaun. I checked the series wiki it just says he's 18 inches tall. He could be a leprechaun, a beyonder, a bit sized timelord, we really DON'T know.

Point is they fucked up too, but they do make up for it as they point out the kids still have a fuckton of lemons they got in the buisness divorce and the kids have a creative solution: ther'es so many things they can make with lemons with Stacy's help they make everything but lemonade.. and quickly gain buisness when Schemer is ineveitbly bit in the ass by karma, i.e the ladies lunchone he was catering boycotting him till he closes up and gladly taking the kids buisness. Happy end for all. A really fun episode with a shockingly timeless moral. Good stuff.

Do I hear

Do I Hear is a decent episode, with a far less clear lesson. it doe shave a random ass music video about some kids little brother destroying anything

I did find out from this shining time ocasionally does music videos with stock footage but like everything else int his series it's a lot to take out of context.

Anyways this one has Elvis show up as a jukebox repair man.

Yeah so backing up the Station is closed for the day but the kids decide to stay behind while Mr Conductor apparently can't do more than just.. tell the kids Billy and Stacy probably had a reason to shut it down.

Naturally Schemer is still here and finds a fake nickle in one of his machines and is pissed.. till he realizes he can use it to get his revenge. So it turns out Schemer has a rivarly with the magical jukebox, which is the least suprising thign in these four episodes. Wha'ts hilarous is that in any other series this would just be a fun rivarly with an inanimate object, like Luke Cage and his coffe machine, or Mr. Parker and his boiler.

Here? The puppets in the jukebox hate schemer.. and given what we've seen of him and how he talks shit about their home and them by comparison regularly, you side with the magic jukebox. So when he tries to use the nickel on them.. they fake being broken.

What intrests me is I thought i knew where the episode was going... after Schemer dicks around on top of a jukebox because Brian O Conner is the best. HE calls a repair man , and I assumed the puppets were either going to be outed, the kids or conductor would have to protect them something. But no the kids don't know and the jukebox repairman.. is elvis.

Yeah they got an actor who honestly looks a lot like the king in his younger days, acts like him and is implied to be him. Either Elivs regenerated into a younger body, cloned himself or simply is reborn every time he dies kenny mcormick styles and rapidly ages. All possible possibly all at once. The lore of his series is rife for fan theory. Send me your own Schemer, Mr Conductor and Reborn Elvis fan theories people!

So turns out Elvis knows the magical puppets exist and tells them to play cool. He then gives Schemer a bill for 11 dollars, who naturally reacts like a mature responsible adult paying for something be broke

So he goes with plan B: have an auction. Naturally this being schemer he auctions anything and everything in the place, and the kids realize "shit we acccidently encouraged him" and try to stop this. Thankfully, while they can't reach Billy, Elvis comes back to save the day. At this point i'm at a loss for jokes.

Schemer even accidently blocks Mr Conductors way into his house.. because he lives here now I guess. Like I said you can write your own lore, mine is that it's the exact layout of snoopy's dog house pre fire. Anyways Billy and Stacy put a stop to this nonsense and instead of arresting schemer just.. scare him off. Though hilarously, and predictably his method of hiding is just.. crouching in front of the banister, which has a railing so they can see him and hoping they forget it. THey also lay into the kids.. again.. even though this time all they did was stay behind. The Schemer shit was ENTIRELY him they just accidently gave him an idea.

The puppets play elvis a song, Mr conductor talks to billy and this episode.. was fine. Not great, but it had some godo schemer acting here and there, the moral is just all kinds of confused.. but it's also hard to hate an episode that has a magical elvis and schemer hanging onto a jukebox for dear life so still good stuff.

Billy's Party

Our final episode for this batch, Billy's Party is a thanksgiving episode, as you can tell by PIlgrim Schemer showing his penis size up there. It's not a terrible idea for the setting either: A train station is giong to be super busy and the episode focuses on railroad tradition in thanksgiving instead of The Pilgrims and the various native tribes

Don't get me wrong, i'd ENTIRELY be up for an episode about Billy's heritage, and the fact the show had a native american main character but did nothign steroptical with him is magical. But I did not remotely trust a 90's tv show to do the story of thanksgiving in a way that wasn't either whitewashing it like I got as a kid, or just plain insulting.

So instead they sidestep it, going into what modern thanksgiving means. And who better to tell us about thanksgiving than thomas the tank engine? Now if you read through my sometimes breif sometimes downright insane thomas reviews, you'll know seasons 1-5.. didn't HAVE a thanksgiving episode. That's not really a thing in the UK, so it's not a thing that exists in a british show about trains.

So rather than just.. find an episode that fit the themes of togetherness.. theyt urned one of the christmas episodes into a thanksgiving episode. Which itself isn't a TERRIBLE idea; both are holidays with lots of travel, and the only real crack is there's tons of mail as that's more a christmas thing.. but then the ending has a fucking christmas tree and i'm just like.. guys. I know you couldn't edit it out but why did you pick one specifically with a christmas tree. Christmas isn't after thanksgiving. Don't start that shit with me Thomas the Tnak Engine.

While the thomas part is sloppy.. the rest... is incredibly well handled: the puppets have thanksgiving and invite a turkey over and in a nice subversion of the "oh you brought a turkey don't kill it" type of stories we get a lot, even Brooklyn 99 good as it was wasn't immune to doing one of these and also lampshading how stupid Charles was for bringing a bird to live kill on thanksgiving day to someone elses house so it worked, their just serving veggies. The turkey is a guest and a rad dude.

As for hte main part the kids wonder why they should give a shit, and Billy is trying to get to his party with , and i'm just quoting it "the yardees and the hobos". I will refer to them as the train workers and homless persons, this was 1993 after all, but it is fun to see them use the terrible h word so casually.

Turns out Billy has nowhere to go unlike the rest of the cast, but was picked to join the rest of the train people. The origin of said meal is also neat: a long time ago they were nemies, the train people not liking hitching passnegers and the homless persons not liking being kicked off their only transportation and sometimes home. But one day a signal didn't get put up in time to switch tracks so the homless persons in the area all rallied to make sure the train didn't crash, and the two sides made peace, having thanksgiving together every year as their the only two groups whose schedules synch up.

Billy ends up not being able to come as disasters keep popping up: they need a train fixed to meet demand, one of the various guests can't reach her apointment so Billy drives her, and Schemer ends up stuck on a train as part of his scam to make the holiday about giving him stuff. If that sounds underwhleming it is. I expect better and stupider from you scheemer. What a disapointing end.

bIlly is left alone.. only for the natural conculsion of everyone coming back to celebrate, including Schemer whose greatful. It's a genuinely heartwarming ending. Why the kidsa re here I don't know, I assume their parents don't exist. HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY.

This episode wasn't as fun without schedmer at full blast but it's still a REALLY good thanksgiving episode with some intresting ideas, and a fantastic finale.

overally I REALLY loved Shining Time Station, continuting the tradition of any thomas spinoff being better than the source thus far. It's fun, has great performances and I will be coming back here somedya on my own or if lachey wants. or if any of you want feel free to comission it .

Next Time: THE MOVIE THAT ENDED AN EMPIRE.

#thomas the tank engine #thomas and friends #schemer #shining time station #didi cohn #cartoons #children's television #90s #80s #george carlin

[alolanroy]

2023 Media Thread Pt3

Sharkula: Finding out that this director cranks out like 8 of these a year makes so much sense. The editing and effects are bafflingly amateur, and by that I mean I don't know how you can make something this inept in good faith. The casting is...concerning. I'm not referring to the 'college students' that look like weekend warriors, I mean that a certain character clearly had some sort of disorder, and it felt pretty exploitative. Funny bad in a pathetic sort of way. -6/10

Sharkenstein: We wanted to see more, but it turns out that instead of a fountain of infine fun-bad, it was just bad. At east the Franken-shark was a Nazi also somehow -3/10

Ronin Mecha 3: Space Warrior: This is the kind of incoherent bootleg movie that makes you feel drunk and delirious from laughing too much. Literally nothing from this poster appears, but I did have an episode when I saw a Scope Dogg. -7/10

Mighty Lady Sparkle: I admire the passion for tokusatsu but I don't admire the ecchi. It's the kind of movie where you start the movie proposing drinking games over its quirks but 20 minutes in you feel uncomfortable. -2/10

Boneworks: It took a bit for it to click for me, but Stress Level Zero made a really impressive standard for VR gunplay and exploration. That being said, some of the physics takes a bit to get used to and if you don't have good VR legs, this game would be borderline unplayable. The physics puzzles and level design aren't quite up to the valve standard they are trying to live up to, the former being groan worthy at times, but the gun handling is fun enough that I was interested in playing some of the alternate game modes. The confused and underwhelming ending left it on an odd note, but I had a blast/ 7.5/10

Netflix One Piece: Sometimes the performances just don't work and the dialogue doesn't quite hit the mark. However it made me understand the appeal of One Piece and I gotta give props to the costuming, makeup and the few actors that understood the assignment. 7.5/10

The Amazing Digital Circuis Pilot: There is a distinction between marketable and appealing. Content can be made with the intent of being white noise. Nice rendering I guess. These are ideas that can coexist. 2/10

Bakuryuu Sentai Abaranger 20th: The Unforgivable Abare: I was initially afraid that this would be 'abaranger vs the woke mob' I was pleasantly surprised by humor and some out of left field GL. Can't complain 6/10

X-Files Revival: I'm not gonna sugarcoat it. While a few of the comedic episodes were absolute gold, This was pretty sad. Its attempts to stay topical somehow make it more dated than the 90s seasons did. Unfortunately trying to be hip left me with a toothless 16 episodes made mostly of mythology episodes that are clearly supposed to go a whole lotta nowhere. 4/10

Gundam Build Metaverse: Never before has a 10th anniversary season made me feel so old and hopeless. The first episode left me hopeful when it delivered a premise I could see blossoming into a good 15-ish episode show with the occasional cameo and a laid-back Hawaiian attitude to my favorite hobby. The OP and ED promised a good balance of modeling, character cameos, and original drama. Then the last two episodes dropped at once after a two-week gap. That was it. It introduced its antagonist as quickly as she was resolved. Most cameos were still images if they appeared. No one is the right age. The new toys are dispatched so quickly it fails as a toy commercial. This had to have gone through development troubles because of the botched 'metaverse' spawned by the Japanese grants they were handing out...right? I huffed the copium and just got a confusing meh. 5/10

DOA Dead or Alive: Finally, a fighting game movie adaptation that understands the assignment! It's dumb! It's campy! It's exploitative and oggling but in a way that respects its subjects more than most 2000's movies in this genre. It almost loops around to being oddly empowering, an opinion seconded by my girlfriends hooting and hollering at the movie. While one performance was funny bad, any martial arts movie with a ladder fight is great in my book. 8/10

The Last Witch Hunter: Rarely does a vanity projects with someones D&D characters end up this fun. It ranks highly for me in the subgenre of modern-day supernatural hunter movies in an urban setting. Rock solid movie. 7.5/10

Analog Horror Grab Bag: What if a VHS was spoooooooky. Look buddy, mashing MarbleHornets and Exploding Varmits together gets less novel the longer you watch 4/10

Murder in Venice: I'm not familiar with the original story, but this was a fun and spooky watch. 7/10

Godzilla vs Megalon (2023): I enjoyed the moments of Shin Godzilla cinematography, but mixed with showa-era goofy moves and shonen combat, this short didn't work for me. The chunky soup didn't benefit from an art style that created my least favorite Godzilla design. 5/10

Fest Godzilla 4: Operation Jet Jaguar: RETURN OF DA KING BABYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE SHOWA IS BACK IN A BIG WAY 7/10

Pistol Whip: Maybe it was the triggers on my controllers but the timing just felt weirdly off. Trying to deliberately juke the timing killed the rhythm game magic and made me feel more like I was waiting for permission to get the bad guys. The John Wick fantasy this is clearly built for wasn't lost on me though, but without that immersion, I just felt bad. Totally subjectively a 3.5/10

Ultraman Netflix Final Season: I don't really get the appeal of public opinion narratives the way anime seems to make them. Similarly, I don't like when noir stories depend on all of the protagonist's friends requiring zero evidence to turn on them at the drop of a hat. Especially when neither party really attempts to talk it out. Its bad writing and a dub with all of the industries bad habits held up by A really hot alien and a funny magical girl transformation that one time. 4/10

Gundam Trilogy Rewatch: Watched this with two friends who were seeing them for the first time. God these things hold up, especially the 3rd one. Incredible stuff. I and II are a 7/10 for me for good content with weird pacing and III is a 9/10 for great writing and drama. Reanimated sections weren't anything to scoff at either

Skyrim 2nd playthrough: I'll say a playthrough where I know what I'm doing and isn't as sidetracked was better at letting me enjoy the setpieces, I think that without the interstitial wanderlust from the feeling of adventuring a new land, something didn't hit the same. However bringing Sarana(SDA), Lydia(IFD) and a few other talking followers added a certain spice to it. An observation I missed the first time was how hard it pushes you interact with some of the factions in a way I think kinda cheapens their organic introductions.

Armored Trooper Votoms: I reductively pitched this show to someone as the midpoint between Gundam and 40K. There's a lot to love with this series: Gorgeous visuals, concise episodes, and the confidence to change its setting periodically to fun locales like Arakis or Vietnam. Chiricho is a unique protagonist who pulls off the Sigma Male archetype with depth and soul. I was pretty enamored with this from an aesthetic standpoint, but I'm not blind to its flaws. The society is a weak antagonist once they are revealed and the pacing drags as it repeats itself to buy time. While ATs are iconic, they aren't always used with the variety they deserve. While maybe only half the series lives up to this score: 8/10

Knights of the Zodiac 2023: I think this might actually be worst live action anime adaptation to date. Never before have I seen any less interest in adapting the source material than this. I can usually find something to like in a bad movie, but for this I have nothing. Maybe I felt something when we all laughed at the Jump Force cutscenes they used as fight scenes. Theres just nothing here. 0/10

Oblivion Override Demo: Ever play Dead Cells? it sure is that with vector graphics. My weakness for this type of robot design puts in most of the work here. movement feels a bit off. 4/10

Half Life 2: VR Mod

-As a way to replay half Life 2: Yep, this is still one of the most important games ever. However, I think that the vehicle sections go on a bit too long and subsequent entries did a lot to improve the visual sameness of a lot of the game 9/10

-As a VR game: Gun handling is excellent. Accessibility options like laser sights for all weapons were fantastic, and they let me help smooth out my own learning curve with the weapons. I will say that weapon selection and two handed aiming was a little cumbersome at times, but weapon reloading was the perfect amount of cumbersome to be satisfying. Even though the game itself didn't get rebalanced to accommodate for VR, it all meshed for a really fun and challenging experience. However vehicle controls were kinda weird and not that great standing. 8/10

Votoms: The Last Red Shoulder: I've come to the conclusion that the real enemy of Votoms wasn't Wiseman, it was the 24 minute episode format. more breathing room meant better pacing and time to really drink in the kino.7.5/10

Cade: The Tortured Crossing: In an incredible stroke of luck I was able to see a Niel Breen film in theaters and I will not lie: it was amazing. The audience was a riot and I nearly passed out from laughter a few times. The editing was surreal and I could see how this was probably stretched from an hour and a half to two hours in the edit. I will not regret giving it an -10/10

Kengan Ashura S2 (???): The real villain is Netflix's release structure. This is one season of anime I saw at a convention like 4 years ago. Its pretty alright. It's competent 6/10

The Mummy 2017: This movie has been a punching bag, both because of the presumptuous launch of the 'dark universe' and also that one trailer that was posted with unfinished sound. Unfortunately, the movie itself is pretty alright and I would like to see more. Plus one point for American Werewolf in London but I take that point away again for another mischaracterization of Dr.Jekyl. 6/10

Votoms Big Battle: Neat stuff. real standout is the fun character design and animation. I also liked the touch of the filter over the villains voice. It kinda hints at how much of a machine he is at that point. 7.5/10

Attack on Titan Final Season part 3: I don't think the ending was bad for the reasons a lot of people say, but I can tell it beefs it in the final chapter. Everything up to that is incredible, Especially the bit with the baseball. Sadly I think the sour note with Mikasa and the tree was an interesting choice that really didn't work out and spoiled it for me a bit. 7.5/10

Attack on titan as a whole... It took a decade. The times weren't always great, but they sure were had. It is politically dense enough that everyone has a half-baked opinion. When it hits, it hits HARD. I think an 8/10. I don't think I was ever bored for a minute.

Godzilla Minus One: I often find myself drawn to the mood of the original Godzilla. Sometimes I wonder if the constraints of its time allows the mind to fill in the gaps. This movie provides us no quarter to do so. It replicates this horror without leaving any to chance. I think this because more than any other in this series, the stakes feel truely desperate and personal. This felt like watching one of those truelly classic films for the first time (oddly enough I was reminded of Jaws...) I'm not sure if it surpasses Shin or the 1954 original yet, but I give this movie a 10/10 with no hesitation.

Knights of Sidonia (Manga): I'll be honest, the first few chapters did a lot to turn me away the first time I tried this, but this series is certainly not the collection of anime tropes I expected. The art is amazing once Tsutomu Nihei hits his stride. The intricate detailing and compositions have to be seen to be believed. I will applaud it for leaving a lot of room to breathe. Most wouldn't resist overexplaining the aliens. The interpersonal story is pretty gutsy, especially considering the resolution to the romantic angle and some surprisingly not weird treatment of characters with fluid genders. However, I think a lot of characters fell through the cracks in favor of the harem angle that was starting to develop (typified by the robot tsundere who felt really unnecessary). 7.5/10

Furi Demake: I get that this is just a little fun proof of concept, ut the Game Bakers kinda under-prooved a few important parts. Namely, the music is generic and the hit hit detection for parrying was wonky. EX: a ground slam you are supposed to parry from right below confused the directional inputs since it can't figure out which way you are facing. 6/10 but I would play a full version of this concept.

Jetborne Racing and Star Trek Bridge Crew: Early VR games with a predominant online component, slow gameplay and wonky controls? in 2023? Yeah Jetborne is unplayable since there's no one online and Bridge Crew is just unintuitive to play. Instead of space mysteries the gameplay consists of figuring out how to undo your space-parking brake 2/10

#watch thread

[stxrvel]

the 5 stages of (my) life

summary: he was everything. there was no before or after him. it was just him.

pairing: bucky barnes x f!reader

words: i think 7k?

warnings: thoughts of loneliness, depersonalisation, mention of depressive symptoms, a lot of bad words at some point, implicit descriptions of sex. i wrote this to be pure angst, idk if i got it, we'll see, you'll tell me.

note: i was watching Grey's Anatomy today and a specific episode about a couple inspired me to write this. it's too inspired by that so thank you Grey's! i don't know if i got the angst i wanted, i hope i did. i actually wrote this just with suffering on my mind. anyway, hope yall like it!! (English is not my first language so sorry for any mistakes!) also, I uploaded this at half past one in the morning so I didn't have time to edit the quotation marks, but tomorrow night I'll make the text look much nicer!

thank u for reading!

You never thought things would go this far.

"I'm not going to stand here and watch you risk your life because you're incapable of expressing your feelings. I'm not worth being put through this."

"You're talking about my fucking life! Why do you want to take control of all the shit I do now? Fuck you."

"I can't believe how fucking insane you've become."

You never thought things would get worse like this.

"I gave up a lot of things for you and you know it!"

"You make it sound like I forced you to. I never asked you to give up your life for me!"

"Exactly, that's the damn problem! You've never asked me to do anything, you've never asked me to do anything, I've just done all this stuff on my own trying to cope with a relationship that's become… one-sided!"

You had heard for a long time how a great many people had said that their best relationships had started with a flame. You couldn't count on the fingers of your hands the number of times you've heard someone say that the best relationship is the one that is always alive, where they keep the flame burning.

But what if it's not a flame? What if it all started with a fire?

You'd heard a lot of things about love, about life, about attachment, but you'd never really experienced it, and you couldn't know how, with the lifestyle you led, your reactions would be when you finally had one. Although, honestly, you didn't expect to ever have one after so many disappointments and abandonments; however, there was one thing that was common about love, that you had heard everyone say: it comes when you least expect it.

But the moment came and, after that event, you considered that your life had only five stages. Only five truly remarkable things that had brought you to the eternal extreme of misery. There was nothing before, there was nothing after. There was only him.

1

You had seen that man, by far, about seven times in the last month. He had a stern look on his face, as if he was in a constant staring match with someone inside his head, or as if he was someone completely drained of emotion, who had lived and felt too much and was tired of it.

Or maybe he was just unfriendly.

Every time you went to therapy, within the last four weeks, you met that man.

The two of you always waited, sitting across from each other in the narrow hallway, trying fiercely to avoid each other's gazes. Or well, you tried not to meet his too much, sometimes it really felt too heavy. Then he would be called first and, more often than not, he would come striding out with his hands clasped. If his vibe was too strong for the session, your therapist never tried to point it out. When he left, the doctor would appear behind him with her typical half-smile calling you by your last name, even though you had asked her not to do so several times.

The other times, which were not so common, the man actually took the time to look serene. You even thought you saw him give you a nod in greeting once, but you couldn't be completely sure of that.

You had never spoken to each other, you were just two strangers who happened to be in the same place at the same time of day at certain times of the week. Still, sometimes, when his eyes met yours, you felt like you were looking into a mirror.

Anyway, you had never spoken to each other, until one day you decided to change that, just because what was the worst that could happen?

"After a while it feels like you have no reason to come, don't you think?"

The man turned his head, and it was the first time he saw you out of volition. His clear eyes moved in an almost imperceptible way, analysing something about you, your face, your clothes, your posture. He looked like a predator ready to strike, but he didn't count on you being a very, very chill gazelle.

"I don't know if you can relate, but it's been really hard for me to come these last few times. I think my only motivation is to come here to have a battle with you of who can go the longest without seeing the other for 30 minutes even though our feet are almost touching?"

You thought you heard a snort in response. Mmm, it wasn't much, but worse was nothing.

"You could just not come," he replied, more crudely than you expected, actually surprising you because you didn't expect him to even pay attention to you.

"Yes, I could," you agreed with him, your gaze drifting to the white tiles, "Anyway, I don't have someone who really cares that I'm okay."

You twisted your lips in a very conformist gesture, and dismissed your attempt at conversation as a failure. Indeed, what was the worst that could happen? That the man would think you were pitiful. But what does it matter? He is a stranger. He's the only person you see regularly besides your therapist. Why should you care that the conversation didn't work? You shouldn't expect the opposite. At some point he'll stop going, he can't be as bad as you. When you least expect it, it will just be you in that narrow hallway again.

"Therapy can be very counterproductive for people who are alone."

You looked up when the man spoke again. You didn't know if you were seeing wrong, but his gaze wasn't as hard as before. He seemed… sympathetic.

"If it makes you feel any better, you're not alone when we wait in this hallway."

You didn't answer him. You watched him as if he were a fly swatted on a wall. You didn't know what to say. What was that supposed to be? Words of support? From a stranger? And what was supposed to be a response to them? That man had flipped the table on you, catching you off guard, and that didn't make you feel very good.

You watched him even after a while in silence, when he had already looked away, his head was down and he had focused on other things. You didn't know what your scrutiny was about; you didn't know whether you were looking for a lie or a mockery, a truth or a ruse. You didn't even know what it was all about. But what does it matter anyway? He's a stranger. He's a stranger sharing that narrow corridor with you. A stranger. A stranger who gave you a few words of support. A stranger. It's a stranger. He is a person.

You shook your head, suddenly regaining your composure. You ran your hands over the fabric of your trousers several times, up and down, down and up. Constantly. About ten times.

You didn't know if it was just you, but you felt suddenly obfuscated in that corridor. As if the walls had invisible hands closing around your throat.

You didn't really know much. You only knew that after the doctor called the man, James, you would never again take the liberty of speaking to strangers as if they were acquaintances, especially those in therapy.

But your mind went blank when James stood up and, before he left, looked at you as if it was something he had planned to do. As if he really wanted to do it. As if he had intended to…

No.

No more.

2

It didn't work.

Of course, it goes without saying that it didn't work.

How could it work? You saw him at least twice a week. And you were weak. Too weak. Too weak. Extremely and potentially vulnerable to suddenly hitting people who gave you a little affection and understanding. You were vulnerable to hitting people. You were vulnerable to ending up in therapy. You were vulnerable.

So what didn't work? Trying to limit your conversations with James to looks. Over the next three weeks, he seemed to have made it his mission to try to keep you company. Did he have any idea how uncomfortable that was for you? But you weren't going to tell him, how could you? Apparently the man wasn't a grumpy, mean looks machine, he was definitely a person who was getting some therapy. He was a person who understood your situation because he had to go through it himself. He was a person. He was a stranger.

Mostly, at that moment, you remembered the conversation that had led you to be in that coffee shop. It was strange. You felt alien to yourself, to your surroundings, but you tried to keep your mind enlightened so you wouldn't freak out.

"You look different."

"We saw each other three days ago."

James twisted his lips. "That's no excuse for not noticing that you look different."

You took a deep breath.

"You really made it your business to talk about something every time we see each other. Did you get tired of me beating you in the staring duels?"

"I'm just trying to get you back in therapy."

"By harassing me with questions?"

"By turning me into a person who cares."

You frowned. The constant knot in your chest was starting to become more and more unbearable. You felt the food from that morning in your throat.

"You'll get the opposite."

James pursed his lips and held up his hands.

"Hey, are you doing anything on Saturday?"

That had been the first time. Yes. Completely out of the loop, somehow you'd agreed the first time. And maybe it wasn't as bad as you'd hoped. Or maybe it was. You had no idea. Just as you had no idea how you had ended up in the same situation for the fifth time.

Fifth time? My goodness.

"You're particularly quiet today," James' face suddenly materialised in front of you.

At what fucking point had he arrived?

"I'm always quiet."

"Not as quiet as today. Are you okay?"

"What are we doing?" you blurted out suddenly. You didn't even process the words in your head until you saw the man's face contort in confusion.

"What are we doing?" James repeated your question, "We're having coffee in a coffee shop."

"You're a top notch clown, you know that?"

The man let out a laugh, and you watched his shoulders move in time with his breaths.

"We're just sharing time. Don't freak out."

"Sharing time?"

"Yes, sharing time."

"I don't think I've shared time with someone in a long time."

"That's not bad. It's good to share time with yourself."

You twisted your lips. You stared at the bubbles in your coffee, still steaming on the table.

"I had to learn to share time with myself," you looked up to see him with his head cocked to one side, a gesture you had learned to associate with his absolute attention to your words. "You've shared time with yourself?"

James nodded.

"All the time, to tell you the truth. I can barely escape myself."

You smiled at him. The constant knot in his chest seemed to have subsided for now.

"I guess we both got to learn."

The man raised his glass of black coffee, tilting his head, "It's the hazards of the job."

Yes, that was definitely what it had to be about. The things that constantly occupied you outside of coffee shops and therapy. Of the things that occupied your head so that you didn't delve into your intrusive thoughts, even though sometimes they seemed to come alive and present themselves in the faces of the people you saw in your daily life.

Undoubtedly it must have been because of that night job. It wasn't a job you loved, it was a job you imposed on yourself to try to make yourself feel better at night when you were trying to sleep. It was a duty. It was a task you couldn't refuse. Too many people had already died for you to give up. You had nothing left.

Many people said it was the job of a vigilante; other people said it was the job of a criminal. In the end, what did it really matter as long as it left you with a clear conscience?

Your therapist knew, but you didn't know if James knew. If he was aware of it and preferred to overlook it to have coffee with you. Or if he knew and preferred to ignore it so as not to ruin things. Or if he knew and pretended he didn't so you wouldn't notice he was doing it all out of pity. Or if he didn't know.

Honestly, you didn't know which was worse.

Sometimes you thought things were better when you were just strangers in a narrow hallway. Sometimes you thought it would be better if you didn't have to make an emotional commitment to him, even though you knew you were already doing it; unconsciously you were doing it.

You had always believed that it was better to be alone. Not to have company. Not to share time with someone you could potentially lose. It was easier to get the job done when you got home and didn't have to answer a text or remember that there's someone waiting for you to text them that you got home safe and sound.

"Hey, don't overthink it."

James' voice broke your concentration. You focused your gaze on his face, suddenly feeling oblivious to the whole scenario.

"You don't have to give it a name, or even think about it. If you really, from the bottom of you, didn't want any kind of company, don't you think you wouldn't have come the first time I asked you?"

"Are you saying this is what I want?"

"I'm saying that you're a person who's used to being alone, but you don't have to be if you don't want to be."

"You're an enigma."

James smiled. "Thank you. I think the same about you."

But it was true what he'd said, you were thinking too much. One of the things your therapist kept telling you was to try to stop living in your head. Acknowledge your surroundings, feel every sensation and take in every possible smell.

It was difficult when the reason you wanted to be in your head all the time was the same reason that all your senses were perceiving at the same time.

But you tried. You felt the wood of the table and the warmth of the coffee cup, you took in the smell of caffeine and James's perfume, a little piney and citrusy, you savoured the coffee left in your mouth from the last time you took a sip. Slowly you tried to bring yourself back to that moment, to focus on your present and, sadly, to acknowledge that you were in a coffee shop with James Barnes.

It was something you constantly shied away from. To acknowledge that you spent time with him. With him. That he deliberately chose to spend his time with you. That you, intentionally, decided to spend your time with him. With the one who started out as a stranger. A person. A friend. A…

No.

3

It had been a while since you had decided to stop closing yourself off to all the possibilities life had to offer. Sometimes you didn't recognise how you got to that point, but other times you felt something close to pride for allowing yourself to go that far. And, really, it could have been one of the best or one of the worst decisions you had ever made in your life.

You spent weeks trying to deny James coming into your life, but the moment you opened the door to him, you had only gone up.

You didn't know you missed the company of a friend on sleepless nights and confessions. You didn't know you longed for the warmth of a lover until hours passed and you couldn't tear yourself away from each other. You didn't know you wasted time denying the feeling. You didn't know that you needed to take a few days off from the exhausting work you had set for yourself. You didn't even know that the work was exhausting.

When you were able to recognise all those things, you were also able to recognise that you had been living life on the edge. You were constantly exposed to everything before you met James. Exposed to danger, to death, to loneliness. You were living too fast because you felt you had no time, that at any moment you would run out of time and you wouldn't have done enough.

And then you finally decided to give yourself a break. From everything. Absolutely everything. Everything.

You moved in with James.

Yeah, definitely.

You took turns shopping. You took turns doing the dirty dishes. You took turns cleaning the flat. It felt like perfect harmony; like suddenly everything was in its place and it seemed like nothing could go wrong from that point on.

"Wait, wait!" you exclaimed with laughter. You moved your body off the bed, the peach-coloured sheet covering your body. You tried to stretch to reach for your mobile phone on the nightstand but James' hands around your waist prevented you from moving too much.

"You can answer that when we're done," the man purred, his hands straining, but not too hard, to pull you back onto the bed.

"Hold on a moment, James Barnes," you mumbled back, when you finally reached for the mobile phone and let out a triumphant laugh.

Vanessa Lennox, you read on the screen, as you felt James cling to your back.

"It's Vanessa," you told him as you unlocked the phone to check her messages.

"Vanessa texts you all the time."

"I know."

"All the time."

"That I know."

"These nights are supposed to be for us. She's not asking you out, is she?"

"No, no, she's…"

I'm in trouble. Can you come over?

"She's all right."

I can't, but I'll write to Tommy. He told me he was watching today, he must be near where you are.

"Are you sure?" you felt James' breath on the back of your neck, as his lips began to touch the most sensitive parts of your back.

"Yes…" you replied in a whisper. "She's going to be fine."

"Then stop turning your back on me," James spoke, his breath colliding against the small of your back. You arched unconsciously. "Look at me."

You inhaled air sharply, leaving the mobile phone locked to the side of the bed. You let James's hands guide your movements until you were trapped in his arms, his chest pressed against your back.

"You're bossy sometimes, has anyone ever told you that?"

"Only you, to be honest."

"Yeah, sure you have," you smiled incredulously.

You stirred until you could stand face to face with the man you shared a bed with every night. His light eyes quickly met yours, and his hands squeezed each side of your waist.

It was getting a little chilly. There were nights when you didn't know how you could stand to be so long without clothes under those sheets. It was easier for James, the weather didn't affect him as much as it did you at the moment. You shivered as a chill ran through your whole body, from the tips of your toes to the crown of your head. You pulled your body close to his, settling your head where his neck and shoulder met.

"Maybe the window is open," you heard him say.

"You know I always close the windows all over the flat before I go to bed."

"Okay, then we'd better figure out a way to get you warm."

As he finished speaking, the man moved, lowering himself from his position until his head was at the same level as yours. His eyes smiled at you as your teeth unconsciously flickered from the cold your body felt. His mouth also stretched into a smile, one of the many smiles you had learned to love. It was a very homely smile. The kind of smile that only you could see, that only you could see, that only you could see. It was a very domestic smile. It was the smile.

"Do you want me to get the other sheet?"

"No," you answered quickly. "I'm fine. We can proceed."

James let out a laugh. His eyes grew small from the flex of his cheeks as he laughed. You saw every flex and line of his face and it was like a balm to your mind.

It wasn't long before the man, in the midst of his smile and that feeling of ecstasy, brought his face close to yours and kissed you as if he hadn't kissed you in years.

Kissing James was like touching heaven. It was like being at peace after years of constant war. It was a great, vast, calm ocean. It was the absolute silence of tranquillity. It was like a great rest after years and years of travel. With his kisses you could begin to believe that you would never be alone again. With his kisses you didn't feel alone. With his kisses you believed it was possible to never be alone again. With his kisses you lost the fear of accepting him unconditionally in your life.

With his kisses, you lost the fear of loving him.

You loved the way he cradled the side of your face when he kissed you, every time, without fail. You loved the way he would start slow, soft, so tender, then fill you with passion and control your mouth without weariness or fatigue. You loved the way he then moved his hands all over your waist to the curve of your buttocks, as if he was admiring every millimetre of your skin through his touch. You loved the way he made love to you afterwards, sometimes so subtle and sometimes so out of control.

To have James was to have the best of everything at the same time.

"Are you getting up early tomorrow?" James asked as he pulled away from you. When you saw his eyes, his pupils were dilated and his breathing resembled yours: quickened and eager.

"No."

"Good."

He kissed you hard.

"Because you're not leaving this bed until Sunday."

4

James had begun to accept occasional missions that Fury gave him. You never agreed. No matter when or where they asked you, you would never have agreed to it. But clearly you couldn't just keep him in the flat until the idea was out of his head. You had thought about it a few times, but… no.

You tried to adjust to the fact that he wouldn't be around as much as before, but it was very difficult. It felt as if you had been given the most delicious candy in the whole world, left to treasure it, to savour it a little at a time, to get used to having it next to you, only to have it ripped away from you without warning, totally unprepared, leaving you to realise that everything was really out of your control. You didn't have the candy in your domain, you had been allowed to have the candy and then it was taken away from you.

"Try to concentrate," you heard Vanessa's voice.

You looked up to find her watching you from the roof of the building across the street. You felt a strong desire to rip the communicator from your ear and stomp it to dust with your boot. It was strange. It was a feeling of constant anger that you didn't know how to control. You were constantly angry except when James came to the flat.

"I'm focused."

"You better be," Tommy spoke up, "because my life depends on it."

"You shut your mouth and focus on not losing sight of the target."

"Vanessa, remind me why I agreed to do this."

"Because you're a great friend who supports absolutely everything we do."

Friend. At what point did you start to consider someone a friend? James was your friend. You thought you considered him that. Your partner. Your friend. James was your boyfriend.

"And you're totally unconditional to us."

A friend is unconditional. James is your friend. He's your partner. Friend. James is unconditional to you?

"I have to start working on my boundaries."

"No, our friend needs to start working on her temper. She doesn't get the required amount of sex a day and she's already starting to freak out."

You frowned.

"So you consider your friend's problems to boil down to sex alone?" you snapped at Vanessa, not avoiding the sour tone with which your words came out. You couldn't help but take it personally. Was that being an unconditional friend? Or being a friend?

"No," she replied quickly, "You know I didn't mean it that way. I was joking."

You hummed a nod, downplaying the words. Playing it all down. Because it didn't really matter, it was so silly to get angry about it. And it was very strange for you to get angry about it. You didn't even used to have relationships close enough to allow yourself to get angry about something they said about you. That was the big example of why you didn't do it.

"The target is moving. He's heading for the nest," Tommy spoke again, his serene tone bringing you back to the topic that was truly important. "Do you see him, Vanessa?"

"Got it."

"Good. Just move into the room towards… Wow, who's that? Who the hell's in there?"

"Damn," Vanessa mumbled.

"Wait a minute."

"We can't wait that long."

"I know," Tommy exclaimed, and from his exasperated tone you could imagine how he was running his hands through his hair repeatedly.

"What the hell do we do, Thomas?"

"I told you to wait!"

"We can't wait, dammit!"

"Wait."

"Thomas, I'm going to-"

"Hold on."

You peered through your binoculars. The large panes of glass surrounding the flat where the target was located didn't let you see much inside. The room the man was in was not as well lit, but you had gone in well prepared.

Finally you could see what the others were seeing. The man had entered the room he was supposed to enter, but there was another man in there with him. And, as far as you could see, they had made themselves comfortable. It didn't look like the other man was going to leave any time soon.

"Let's do it," you spoke, breaking the silence, giving voice to the only option they had that neither of the other two wanted to say.

"Are you insane?" Tommy exclaimed through his teeth.

"We don't have a choice. We declare it a red zone and end the mission."

"We don't even know who that man is," Vanessa interjected, her voice unsteady as she was unable to acknowledge that you were right, hesitating because you were running out of time.

"That's what the red zone is all about."

There was a moment of silence. You knew they were both considering it, the idea had been in their heads since the man entered the room, but their moral compass was much stronger than yours.

"He could be an innocent person," Tommy tried to justify not making that decision.

"How innocent can he be sitting there with the target?"

"And how do we know he's guilty?" Tommy exclaimed back.

"We're wasting more time discussing this," Vanessa spoke again, and you could breathe in her deep inhale before she said, "I think we should do it, Tommy."

The man cursed through his teeth.

You looked through the binoculars again, and both men were still inside the room.

You heard a beep on the communicator and then a steady static. Someone had changed the channel.

"I'm relieving myself as mission leader. You're in charge," it was Tommy.

"What?"

"I can't do this."

"Thomas…"

"I can't make this decision. Just… just do it."

You heard the beeping again and then it was Vanessa saying, "Thomas, what the hell are we going to do?"

"Vanessa, aim for the target," you ordered as you began to open the case next to you, just in case a situation like that arose.

"What?"

"This mission has been declared a red zone. We're going to proceed according to protocol."

The woman didn't speak again.

Nor did she say anything when you had climbed down from the rooftops and found yourselves in an alleyway in the middle of the buildings. You were waiting for Thomas, your guns already stowed in the van.

"He relieved himself," Vanessa spoke after a while, and though it sounded like she wanted to ask a question, it sounded like a statement.

"Yes."

Vanessa shook her head in an affirmative gesture. She didn't say anything else. She leaned against the concrete wall with a blank stare.

Your mobile phone rang inside the van.

"Is that Thomas?" your companion asked.

You moved closer to look at the device's screen.

James.

"No."

You took the mobile phone and moved away from the woman's figure, further down the alley. Your heart was racing, it was out of control. You had been waiting for that call for days. You had spent sleepless nights waiting for one measly message. You had taken hundreds of missions just so you wouldn't have to endure sleeping in a bed alone. You felt like your body had been frozen until that moment, until that call, and finally….

"James? Are you here yet?"

A woman called your name on the other end of the line.

"Bucky arrived a couple of hours ago."

Your feet stopped walking.

"And the mission went well?"

Silence.

A beeping and constant muttering was all that answered you on the line.

"Is James okay?"

"He's stable. He suffered some injuries. We lost communication with him in the last few days and we thought that…"

You couldn't quite remember when you had arrived at the old Avengers Complex. Your body moved automatically and your vision was so blurred that you had no idea how you could get through the crowd without bumping into someone. It was all very strange. You spent months convincing yourself that it would never happen again. Ever since James accepted those damn missions, you spent weeks trying to convince yourself that nothing would ever go wrong. That his kisses would always be there. His reunion kisses were the best, they were a wellspring of calm that washed away all the anxiety that consumed you alive during the days when you couldn't hear from him.

You had already made up your mind that it would never happen again. He promised you that it wouldn't happen, that you wouldn't have to relive that heartbreaking feeling one more time.

And he broke it.

You wanted to be relieved to see him. You wanted to be happy to know he was alive. Bruised, but alive. You wanted to hold him, to stay with him and never let him go again. But you just stood there in front of his stretcher. And he didn't try to make you come closer either. He saw it in your eyes, you knew it. He knew it.

Seeing him on that gurney made you angry. It aroused your anger that this man had broken the promise he sealed with so many kisses. You felt so much disappointment that your chest had become a bottomless void of a feeling of impersonality. You didn't want to be there. You didn't want to go through it. You preferred to think that you could overlook it. You should overlook it. Why didn't you overlook it? You could live in ignorance, pretend to be the perfect girlfriend. Everything could be easier for both of you, for you, if you just ignored all those feelings and took this situation as a normal person would.

But your knees gave way to your tears and crashed to the floor. From the corner of the room, you could see your body shake in uncontrollable weeping. You didn't know why it hurt so much, if he was alive. You didn't know the reason for the agonising pain, if he was there. And yet, your face contracted in incalculable pain. It was as if he had died on that stretcher. It was as if you had been called to come and acknowledge his corpse.

And you knew James knew, because he hadn't said anything since you arrived. He had done nothing but watch you.

There, from the corner of the room, you could see him crying with you.

He knew.

You knew it.

5

The mission was simple.

Infiltrate, seduce, accompany, lull, kill.

But simple doesn't always end easy.

Since James had returned to the flat, he had vowed never to go out on any mission again, under any circumstances. And, indeed, he was keeping that promise. He was spending as much time at home as before.

But you weren't.

Every time James tried to talk to you about that mission where he might have died, you went into a kind of shell where you shut yourself off from all communication and fled from that place to one where you felt more at ease. More in control.

You got so tired of running away that you decided to start investing that time in something that would actually pay off. You started accepting missions with Thomas more often than before.

You knew James was trying to understand you, he was trying as hard and as willing as he could. Sometimes you would arrive and there would be dinner for you in the fridge or in the microwave. Sometimes you'd see your clothes piled in a corner of the yard suddenly neatly folded and smelling decent. Sometimes you'd walk into the bedroom and find little presents on top of the nightstand, right next to your side of the bed.

You knew James was trying.

But you also knew he was getting tired.

Weeks passed since you first came in and he was waiting for you sitting on the couch. It was a very hectic night, with too many questions and not enough answers. Sometimes you arrived and the flat was lonely. Sometimes you arrived and there was no food. Sometimes you arrived and there was only screaming.

But it was easier that way. You'd already felt what it was like to almost lose him, you'd already experienced that overwhelming emotion that had been with you so much in the past, and you knew, beforehand, that if it happened with James, there was no way you'd get out of it alive, so it was easier this way.

So it was easier that way. He'd walk away on his own, you'd forget about him, and you wouldn't have to suffer if he ever died.

Die.

James would die one day.

But not a day when he was with you.

So yes, you did spend a lot of time away from home.

Maybe you really should have thought twice before deciding that this was the best option.

You knew you dreaded James' death, and the loneliness that followed his passing.

But you had no idea how panicked you would be at the thought of your own death, after meeting him.

Because you would forget him, and that would be fairly easy for you, but he wouldn't forget you. And he would suffer, much more than he was suffering since you didn't come home.

"What the hell happened?" you remembered hearing a voice.

You couldn't be too aware of your surroundings lately.

"It was a simple mission," you heard another male voice.

"It was supposed to go well. She was supposed to call us if things got complicated."

You remembered little of being in the hospital.

You remembered a lot of James sitting in an armchair next to your gurney.

You remembered a lot of his silence.

You also remembered when, some days, you were awakened by his cries and had to pretend to be asleep so as not to interfere with his suffering. Because, ever since that accident happened, ever since you could remember what happened after that, James had become wary of his feelings. He wasn't as expressive as he used to be. And you didn't have the slightest idea what to do.

You couldn't believe that before you could get to the point where you could tell how each other was doing just by listening to each other's breathing, and after that you couldn't even meet each other's eyes by accident.

You were two strangers again.

You were losing him. You knew it. Every day that you went without doing something, without talking to him, without showing a hint of remorse for what you'd done, was a day closer to being completely alone again.

And you didn't even show it, but it was painful. Seeing him shut down like that, seeing him lose the sparkle in his eyes when he looked at you, realising that he lost the will to try… knowing that you took away his will… it was all too much.

Really, you never thought things would get this bad.

"What are you doing?"

You didn't think they had gotten this bad, until one day you came to the flat and saw a suitcase in the room full of his clothes.

"I'm tired."

Those were the first words he'd spoken to you in days.

"And I don't have to put up with this anymore. So I'm leaving."

You knew it was going to happen, but for him to say it like that…

"You're leaving?"

James turned to look at you. His icy expression paralysed you.

"Are you still surprised?" he blurted out gruffly, and continued packing his clothes.

You just stood there in the doorframe, watching him move as fast as if he had a coal-fired engine in his chest. As if he couldn't wait for the moment when he could finally get out of there.

"Really…" he spoke suddenly, "You've really gone weeks, weeks, without speaking to me no matter how many times I've tried to talk to you, and you decide to do it now just because you're watching me leave? That's what I needed to do to get you to react?"

You didn't answer, you just watched him, your mind blank. He was angry. Irate, rather. And you knew he was absolutely right, but you couldn't do anything about it. You couldn't do anything about it because things were going your way. If James went away, if he went away hating you, he wouldn't suffer in the future when you died and you could forget him in peace. That was the best thing. The only good thing you could do for him: keep him away from you.

"Don't you think I deserve an explanation?"

Yes, you do.

"No."

"No?" he repeated incredulously. "I know I made a mistake. I made a mistake in accepting those missions. I told you, I did it countless times. And yet, all those countless times you chose to turn your back on me."

The man watched you, his eyes filled with pent-up emotions that he finally allowed to overflow.

"I tried to understand you. I really did. I gave you your space. I tried to do whatever you needed because I knew it was hard for you, but it was like… trying to water a cactus daily. Everything I did seemed to have the opposite effect."

You're right. You're absolutely right. I'm sorry, I was overcome with fear and panic. I got carried away. Please don't go.

"You didn't even give yourself a chance to listen to me. Not once. Do you have any idea how all that made me feel?"

Yes, you must have felt very lonely. Abandoned. Despised by me. It was my fault. I shouldn't have let it all go so far.

"Do you want me to call a taxi?"

Of all the things you longed to say, that was the only thing your mind allowed to come out of your mouth.

You saw him sketch the sternest look of disbelief you'd ever seen. But you also saw pain, extreme pain at the rejection of your words.

"Are you fucking kidding me? How can you be so cynical?" James exclaimed, his face contorted in anger and helplessness. You cringed a little at the shout but didn't move away from him as he came striding towards you in long strides. "Tell me, did you even care about me? At any point in this… relationship, was anything you gave me real?"

You half-opened your lips to answer, but could not formulate the sentences you knew would comfort his heart.

Yes, absolutely everything was real, all my love and suffering was real.

James walked away, and you didn't know if it was possible that his face could look even more downcast.

Your hands were shaking with helplessness. He was still there. You could still try to save him. Why didn't you? Why? Why? Why?

"How can you be so fucking expressionless? How can you not be in pain… for this? How?"

"You're going to be fine," the words escaped your mouth before your mind could process it.

The man turned to look at you.

"You really are…" he raised his hand and gripped it tightly, swallowing his words and turning back towards the wardrobe to start throwing his things into the suitcase.

Suddenly, he let out a scream. And then a cry.

"I swear, if you'd just tell me no, I'd stay."

He looked at you. His tear-filled eyes met yours and you knew that would be an image that would haunt you to death.

"I would stay… I really would, but… I still can't believe you are so foolish. The first thing you did when you left that hospital was to go back to another mission. How could you care so little about your life? How could you care any less that I care about your life?"

I care about my life even more since you're in it. Don't go.

"It's just work," is what you replied.

"No, no, no…" James hummed with laughter, but his face lacked grace. "I'm definitely not going to stand here just watching you risk your life because you're incapable of expressing your feelings. I'm not worth being put through this."

"It's my life, James."

"But you made me part of your life! I'm here! We're supposed to share our lives together. Why is it only about you now?"

"It's supposed to be my choices…"

"But why can't I be a part of them?" James exclaimed loudly. Your mind clouded over, and even though all you wanted to do was apologise from there until the end of time, you had too much pent up anger because of that very inability to say what you truly thought.

You're right, I am unable to express my feelings. I am sorry. Don't go away.

"You're talking about my fucking life! Why do you want to be in control of all the shit I do now? Fuck you!"

"I'm not trying to control anything, goddamn it! I just need to know…"

"No! You don't need to know anything. You don't need to know anything about me. We're here and you're packing your bag. You have no right to know anything."

James let out a snort.

"We're here and you still can't talk to me. I can't believe how bloody insane you've become."

"Just go."

Don't go.

"This is bullshit."

James finished throwing all of his clothes into the suitcase. You watched his every move, every flex of his body, every grimace on his face, every flick of his hair, how his fingers clutched at the things he took, how his scowl didn't lessen one bit. You watched and watched. It was all you could do.

You leaned against the doorframe and watched him take his anger and pain out on his clothes and his suitcase. It gave you a strange kind of feeling to see him like that, something that felt mildly familiar but you couldn't put a name to it. You wanted to turn things back. If you could turn back time you would, and every single thing that went wrong you would fix.

But would you really? Did the problem really go back to when things with James started to go wrong? The problem was you. You were the problem. You couldn't talk, you could only think, you could only repress, you could only suffer. Only you, you and you. Only you because you were alone, because you had always been alone and there was no reason to believe that could change. James lied to you, that was the reason he was leaving and you had no reason to stop him. He had to go. If he didn't want to go through that, he shouldn't have lied in the first place. If he didn't want to go through that, he shouldn't have asked you out in the first place. He shouldn't have met you. He shouldn't have spent time with you. You shouldn't have stopped him.

Stop him.

You should stop him.

James closed the suitcase.

"I did too much for this relationship. I gave up too much for both of us. I gave up everything I was for this relationship. I gave up too much for you and you know it!"

You narrowed your eyes and began to approach him in rapid strides. He towered over you by several inches, and there was a time when you loved that, but now you hated that he could see you that way. He had always seen you that way. So small…

"You say that as if I forced you. I never asked you to give up your life for me!"

"Exactly, that's the damn problem! You've never asked me to do anything, I've just done all this stuff on my own trying to cope with a relationship that's become… one-sided!"

You walked away.

"Just… leave now."

Please leave before I tie you to this flat and never let you leave again.

He wanted to say something else. You knew he wanted to say something else. It was obvious he hadn't said half the things he wanted to say. But he didn't.

He took his suitcase and left.

He really left.

He walked past you, not caring that the brush of his shoulder against yours almost made you fall. He passed you and walked straight to the exit, slamming the door hard on his way out.

He was gone. He was gone. He was finally gone. He was really gone.

Now you were alone. You were alone again. That's what you wanted, wasn't it? You'd done a lot of things in the last few months to make him go away, and he was finally gone… but then why weren't you satisfied?

Why did you want to run after him? Why did you want to go and kiss him? Why did you want to stop him and beg him to forgive you?

Who did he think he was to deserve that after what he had done?

But… what had he done?

No.

What had you done?

#james bucky barnes #bucky barnes angst #avengers #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky fanfic #bucky fic #bucky fluff #bucky x you #bucky imagine #bucky angst #bucky x y/n #winter soldier #james buchanan barnes

[halliescomut]

Secret Crush on You Ep 14

-It's cute that Nuea really wants to make sure Toh's parents approve of him. I don't think he's ever encountered people who didn't like him before.

-Toh's mom=actual queen.

-Sky...of course perfect for winning over parents and I love that she was so happy for Jao.

-Careful Som, your jealousy is showing.

-Daisy is so precious. I love that Touch was so clear with him, that he likes Daisy for who he is, however he wants to present. Also, surprised to see Daisy say that they're trans. I feel like in BLs we see a fair amount of trans actors and characters, especially in comparison to 'traditional' (read straight) media, but not much discussion around it.

-I do love the drunkies, I will say that. They work hard all week, they deserve to let loose if they want.

-Oh no...."It's Friday Nuea, what about my lessons?" Jesus Lord, Papa Toh is gonna catch them making out I just know it....I pray it's just making out....

-Fuck I was right....I can't tell for sure, but the vibes I get from Papa Toh are far more 'I do not wanna see my kid making out with anyone' and not homophobic or 'I dislike Nuea in particular'. At worst I think it's a case of 'No one is good enough for my baby.'

-I am very confused about this dropping the lime scene. I rewound it twice and still can't figure out what's going on.

-Nuea & Papa Toh confrontation....please don't murder Nuea and bury him in the garden!!! He loves Toh!!

-These nosy fuckers eavesdropping so obviously.

-I was right!!! Papa just didn't want to see it (which is fair).

-Papa Toh is really just grouchy, much like Nuea's Dad. "I hate that you're handsome." What? -- OMG!!! Papa Toh is grouchy because Ma also thinks Nuea is handsome!!! Amazing!!!

-I don't know what the competition is, and I'd say they're playing tops v. bottoms, but we all know that Som is the top, let's not be ridiculous.

-Aww, match hats....so cute. And important, it's very important to protect against sun damage!!

-Like...I know it's product placement, but I like the face wash ad, I don't care.

-Some true words of wisdom from Mama and Papa Toh. Very sweet.

-Yes Sky- Lock it down!!! (Also, again with the cool shirts, the teeny birdies, I love it.)

-I absolutely love Sky's elementary school friends dragging him. That's true friendship.

{Return EDIT: I really loved the whole sequence of Sky taking Jao to the places that have been important to him and introducing him to people he knows and cares about, but it wasn't until I was writing the Master post for all of my little watch alongs that I realized, it's not just about giving Jao a chance to learn more about Sky and his life, since they haven't known each other their whole lives, he's specifically going around and introducing him to everyone that matters to him to show Jao how important he is to Sky and to reinforce that he's not ever been and never will be ashamed of him. And that's just so damn precious!!!!}

-OMG That present was so cute!!!! Jao you romantic little peach!!!

-Everybody watching and 'awwwwing'- adorable!

-Sweet university memories. So cute.

[I just went to title this post and thought somewhere I had combined two episodes into one post because Viki auto plays, but no I just labelled my last two posts as ep 12, but they were 12 & 13.]

-I keep forgetting that this show gets very spicy sometimes and I'm watching at work...

-Aww....Nuea added Toh to the stalker wall 'because their crushes aren't a secret anymore'. That's so precious and weird. God, I can't handle it.

And we're up to the finale!!!

Score for this ep- absolute 10/10, 11/10 even. So good, so sweet. I love it!!!

Awkwardness rating- I think only like 4/10, the dad seeing them make-out, kind awkward. And then the stalker wall made a return, but awkwardness was heavily reduced since Nuea decided to make it a couple's stalker wall.

*Edit: Turns out this was the finale, and it did feel quite finale-ish while I was watching, but Viki listed 15 episode, but the last episode is just a 'Making of--' thing, so...

Final thoughts of the series as a whole: I really liked it. Like a lot. It's honestly like a 9/10 for me. It is hard to push through the secondhand embarrassment sometimes, so I can see why people struggle with it. Also, the summary on most sites is doing nothing to sell it, for real. As many different types of queer representation are present in this show, it definitely should be hyped more.

I dunno, I may make another post if I have more in-depth thoughts, but I 100% recommend watching. It's fun, silly and full of heart.

#secret crush on you #nueatoh #somtor #billyseng #skyjao #TouchDaisy #IntouchDaisy

[jandjsalmon]

2023 FFRC - April 🌷

It's finally hammock weather in Western Canada, folks! And we've been enjoying watching the hockey playoffs from the patio entertainment area we set up once the snow melted - well, I don't know if the word "enjoying" should be used when the team we hate most in the world is moving on to the 2nd round - but it's been exciting anyway.

We've also been sick at our house for most of the month but we're finally starting to come out of it. My Bethy still sounds like Miley Cyrus when she talks - but other than some low-key coughs, she's no longer down with a fever, so we're happy about that.

Continuing along - it's rugby season - so that means a lot of driving to away games to cheer on the Spartans (which means a LOT of reading). I've read more this month than I have ever read. I was also really focused on finishing up the 'extreme' tasks at the @fanfic-reading-challenge - and I finished a few days ago. I'll keep going until I've completed all the tasks in the challenge but I can do that over the course of the rest of the year. 🎉

Below the cut are my stats and some fun fic recs for you. Enjoy!

April 2023

So as you can see, this month I read 2.3 million words, cracking over 7 mill total - and read 922 chapters (of various lengths), and 107 full (and sometimes long) stories. I was working on some fandom challenges and let me tell you - it was harder than it looked!

As for my recs for you! Try these - you might enjoy them. 🖤🖤

--*--

Wonderwall by junkpuppet225 (Carmy/OC - M 11/11)

Summary: Carmy meets Mia at a Al-Anon meeting. She’s going through a similar situation and they become friends. Can he get out of his own head long enough to embrace the feelings he’s starting to have for her or will living in his brothers shadow cause him to miss out on a chance at love? Carmy/OC

Why you should read: THE BEAR FANFICTION! I'm not a Carmy/Sydney fangirl and that is what this fandom is saturated with, so I was HAPPY to find that someone wrote a story where Carmy meets a girl at an meeting and they just GET each other. And neither one is a perfect human - she doesn't SAVE him from himself or anything. They just bear each other's burdens and are THERE for eachother. This is just gorgeous.

--*--

Hello, Sunshine by Wonderlandleighleigh (Lenny/Midge - M 20/20)

Summary: It's June of 1962, and to celebrate being a year clean, Lenny rents a little house in Malibu, inviting Midge to join him.

Why you should read: I got back on my nonsense with the season premiere of TMMM and since I got 3 minutes of Lenny and now have to wait like 8 episodes to see him again, I thought I'd reread old favourites. This one is set post S4 sometime in the future - when Lenny has been in rehab and wants to make things right with Midge. It's SO good and captures their characters perfectly and makes me want to sit on the beach with good friends (and a handsome Jewish comic).

--*--

Love in the Time of Quarantine by @melanoradrood (Neville/Pansy - E 5/5)

Summary: a case study on what happens when a bratty sub spends eighteen months in quarantine and gets so desperate she will have sex with the shy boy from boarding school that promises her orgasms. aka muggle panville tinder au during the great panini

Why you should read: FIRSTLY - Neville is one of my most favourite characters in all of Potterdom and I wanted him to be happy almost from the very first moment we met him. Secondly - it's funny. Hot and funny and sweet. I mean, Neville wants to save her dying(dead) plants that happened to be in the back of her tinder pictures. He's a delight. And this fic is also a delight. You should read it!

--*--

The Raven - For the Rare and Radiant Maiden Series by @drollicpixiefanfic (Wenvier - E 3 fics)

Summary: Xavier Thorpe didn’t exactly expect Wednesday to use the cell phone he purchased for her. It was a ridiculous idea, a whim, a fancy. But something had compelled him to try. So, it was with some shock, two weeks into their break from Nevermore, that Xavier’s phone buzzed on his nightstand.

Why you should read: I'm certain I rec'd this before - but now there is a third story that came out this month (and IT IS AMAZING) - so I could just rec that third story, or I could link you to the whole thing and make you reread it (just like I did). Post season 1 - kinky hot but super tender as well. Funny. Just lovely. and I'm never going to complain about a Xavier PoV. He's my fave. Read this one - if you're not into Wenvier yet, make this your first foray. Come ship with me!

--*--

ANYWAY - I'm always looking for new fic recommendations, so if you have any stories you think I'll love (whether you wrote them or your friend wrote them or you came upon them accidentally), please drop me a line or send me a dm. I've found SO many awesome fics through recommendations from others. I'll read almost any pairing and any fandom. Shoot me a link!🖤

(lastly- I'm a little bit in love with this gif of Xavier waving - and I've been purposely flooding my dashboard with Percy for reasons - so the wave might become a theme for my year - have you seen my new tumblr layout? I'm kinda in love with it. SO pretty).

Anyway -👋🏼 Hiya -I'm happy you're here! I hope you have a wonderful May and I'll see you back here in a few weeks! Happy reading! 🖤

#jandy's fanfic reading challenge adventure 2023 #reading fics with jandy #fanfic reading challenge 2023 #2023 fic reading challenge #2023frc

[livcosmos]

HSMTMTS Season 1-3

Ok, honestly I enjoyed this more than I should have…I was sceptical in the beginning and I mean very sceptical but I wanted to know what all the fuss was about so I watched it and well… it became my whole personality in the past few weeks.

"Finally Free” is my new favourite song, Gina is my new role model and "Gotcha Head in the Game” why new motto!

But let's start with the beginning because it took me a little to get here…soooo if you have read any of my past posts you know I absolutely love Joshua and his music. I am totally on his side in all that Olivia drama (even though I also love Olivia’s music) and yes I'm fully aware that the offscreen drama has nothing to do with the show but I can’t help but draw some connections I'm sorry...

Alright so season 1 wasn’t my favourite, yes I enjoyed it and I cried at the end but seasons 2 and 3 were absolutely amazing, they were soooo much better! I totally shipped Ricky and Nini I was all there for them even though, Ricky is kind of annoying sometimes and he freaks me out with his indecision and his moping around all the time but on some level, I do get him. Nini on the other hand…well I didn’t quite like her she just annoyed me with her going away and coming back and all that and there was also something about her that kept me from fully liking/connecting with her. Now please don’t come for me but I don’t buy that Olivia wasn’t around that much in season 3 because of the tour, I think that she just didn’t wanted to be on the show anymore because she got where she wanted to be and she doesn’t need it anymore. Please don’t get mad at me but I am kind of happy she left the show …again I totally shipped her with Ricky they made sense together all the history and all and I cried when they broke up in the treehouse (by the way that episode is one of my favourites) the breakup felt soooo real I'm almost sure there wasn’t that much acting in that scene. Oh and I also cried when she came to the opening night in season 3 and talked to Kourtney and the cards OMG and of course the lottery ticket for Ricky…it made me so emotional and yes I would have liked for her to stay but on the other hand, I think its better that way. I just feel sorry for her friends, especially Kourtney!

Wow I said I was going to start with the beginning but here I am talking all over the place… so if I already did it I might as well keep on going soooo let's move on with my favourite ship of the show, the ship that unfortunately didn’t survive and I'm very very upset about it!!!! EJ and Gina!!!! Those two OMG their relationship in season 2 was everything for me! I didn’t like EJ in season 1 but season 2 EJ was my everything. It's the same with Gina I didn't quite like her in the beginning but now I love her so much she just motivates and inspires me to give my best in everything and ahhh I was soooo happy when they finally got together they matched so well! Yes of course I understand why they broke up and Gina had her point but still I’m so sad that they broke up I really really hope that  EJ will at least be in season 4, I need him there, he has to be there he just has to! And yes Gina and Ricky make sense but I'm forever and ever Team Gina and EJ no matter what!

OHHHH and I love Kourtney sooo much, I love her attitude and that she is into fashion and I relate so much with her! I love how they address mental health in this show and Kourtney’s anxiety…. I could relate so much! I love her friendship with Giana and Ashylin there are so great together and I love how they support and help each other up, it’s so beautiful! And Carlos omg I love him too his adorable!

Oh and of course, another favourite of mine is Miss Jenn of course, I love her she is the best! I love how she cheers them up and OMG when she came to camp to help EJ and ohhh her talks with Nini! Why don’t teachers like her exist in real life? OOOHHH and most importantly can she please get together with the robotics teacher what’s his name...Benjamin right, I like them together and they make way more sense than she and Ricky’s dad!

Now let’s talk about my favourite songs I loveeeee "Finally Free” as I said in the beginning but I also adore "1-2-3” and „Different Way to Dance” oh and of course "What do you know about love"!

By the way can we please talk about the guest stars OMG like Chad and Rayen!!! And Jackson from Hannah Montana and Mitchel from Modern Family!!! I love the troughbacks in this show, they brought up so many things from my Disney childhood and I loved the Camp Rock vibes in season 3! It's so nice that they bring up and honour the shows that we 2000s kids grew up with!

Omg the reality show episode in season 3 was also one of my favourites it was so funny (ohh another absolutely hilarious moment was Ricky performing "Bet on it”!), and episode 8 from season 2 is also one of my absolute favourites, as I mentioned before because it made me so emotional! As for my favourite season, I can’t quite decide between season 2 and season 3 they were both equally amazing!

I feel empty now that I am done watching all episodes, I need more! I can’t wait for season 4! And God, please let EJ be there!!! I know it’s a silly hope because it’s probably not going to happen but ahhh I wand EJ and Gina to get back together! They are my favouriteee!!! But the only thing there is left to say is: I trust the process! So what comes will come but let's hope it comes soon!

#hsmtmts #high school musical the series #disney plus #hsm #gina porter #ej caswell #kourtney greene #ricky bowen #ej and gina #ricky x nini #hsmtmts season 3 #hsmtmts s1 #hsmtmts s2 #hsmtmts s3 #hsmtmts spoilers #miss jenn #nini salazar roberts #wildcats #east high school

[what-do-1000-swords-look-like]

So I rewatched the season 2 finale of Big Sky (I highly doubt I'll have time to binge the first 2 seasons before next week tbh) and idk I just had some thoughts.

Putting them all under the cut. I think it pretty much goes without saying at this point: if you don't like, don't read.

Love the idea of the show. I've never actually seen it (outside of Jensen's episode I mean) and never knew it existed before then but man do I love Kathryn Winnick. She never disappoints. And I had never heard of Kylie Bunbury but omg do I love her. Both women have incredible chemistry and the whole cast seems to be pretty well settled in from what I could tell in 2x18. Janina is a power house, I truly enjoy watching her. And Constance, LOVE her. (I know it's not likely but I really hope we still get to see her in the future)

Now for the story...big sigh. To be fair, I have no idea behind the story other than what I could put together watching that episode, and obviously there was a lot going on with Scarlet's story with Phoebe, Cassie and Mark, Jenny and Travis, Beau coming in as a replacement for Tubb, Ren dealing with her father and brother - all of it. But sometimes, idk, the pacing felt...off? Like maybe it would be a beat too long in one scene, and then too short in the other if that makes sense? I don't know how to put that vibe into words but it just kind of had me going 'hmm'.

Like the whole thing with Jenny and Travis. I get there's a backstory there that I am only getting a glimpse of but it's obvious there was some involvement between the two at one point. What gets me is that okay this thing is going on right now in the show with them and sure enough, she lets him go so he can go find this former girlfriend of his. It hurts her to do it but she does it. But my issue comes with what's so obviously being set up in the story at the same time this is going on (again, the writing). Beau comes in and it's obvious from the get go that he's going to be one of the main sides coming up in the show (even before the announcement of Jensen becoming a season 3 regular), right behind Jenny and Cassie. And that's all fine and good, but sure enough, they make it obvious that he's going to be something for Jenny. And what kills me is not only did it feel like Beau had more interesting chemistry with Cassie that felt like it could have gone somewhere (I know, in the story she's already involved with someone else, I'm not saying that should be broken up), cringe-worthy tension between he and Jenny even after they started to get along that felt a bit...forced (this is not a reflection on Kathryn or Jensen btw, it's the writing and tbf to the writing it's ABC so I'm giving it that benefit of the doubt), but in their car dialogue she literally points out that he's still in love with his ex-wife (which he doesn't deny but instead confirms in his own way) after he tells her he moved to Montana to be closer to her and their daughter. In the same episode Travis can't let go of the memory of the former girlfriend (before he found out she might be alive). I don't know much about Jenny yet obviously, but it felt like they were literally having her jump from one guy with issues to another guy who has possible issues, and that's messed up imho. (listen, I love my girl Kathryn, okay?)

I just hate seeing that type of stuff, especially when it's indicative of possible patterns in the writing. But to be fair, I've only seen the one episode so I could be completely off base. Either way, I'm willing to give it a shot and see what happens.

And coming from Jensen himself, the show appears to be looking to "shake things up" in season 3 and now that Reba has come on board (LOVE LOVE LOVE Reba, I literally squee'd in delight when I saw that announcement, I tend to turn into a bonafide fangirl when two of my faves cross paths, don't ask me why), I'm excited to see what's in store. I love the character of Beau (and not just because it's Jensen). There's something really intriguing about him and his story that still remains to be seen. Maybe it is that whole Texas coming into Montana vibe, like being a fish out of water (pun intended especially with the episode name), jumping from one lake into another. Or maybe it's his back story with his ex-wife and daughter, and I think he and Cassie talked about grief counseling? (makes me wonder if he lost someone on the job or if there was another family member, just sayin') I'm curious to see how his role will unfurl throughout the season. I really also can't wait to see Reba's character, Sunny, and find out exactly what is going on beneath that wholesome, friendly facade she's got going on. I am curious to see how things will develop with Beau and Jenny (though ngl, trying to get keep that vibe from above out of it as much as I can going forward), and I am beyond happy to see more/hear more of Beau and Cassie's friendship. The promos look great, so does the cast. I'm feeling better about going into the next episode.

Regardless of whatever happens, I think it's going to be one hell of a fun ride and we'll have to see where it takes us. I wish Kathryn, Kylie, the cast, Reba, Jensen and the show good luck in its upcoming season. I'll be watching.

#big sky #big sky season 3 #big sky 2x18 thoughts #bigskyposts