#i was struggling with the background and ended up leaving it messy

[providencehq]

Powehouse AU: aka Danny Fenton tries to be a normal college student in the midwest yet is forced to continue to be a hero in secret as ghosts won't leave him alone and soon, neither will the Justice League when he pops up as a new hero.

Additional info and art under readmore:

ANYWAYS, here is some powerhouse au information.

Danny as he grows up manages to keep the ghost situation under control to a point he isn't overly active as Phantom. He finishes highschool no problem and goes to uni over in Central City for Maths and Engineering (not an overtly big fan of the space motif and instead, I'm shoving my boy into something cooler: PLANES! He's studying specifically mechanical engineering and has plans to go to a trade school after his B.S. for A&P mechanics.)

Sam goes to Gotham State University for Ethnobotany and works in one of the unis library part time. Tucker is going to Star City College for Computer Science and a minor in archeology, he tutors part time.

Danny's main design is inspired by a combo of military and blue collar uniforms (you can also see exactly what I reference). I also couldn't decide a face mask so you get all three options.

So as Danny moves to Central City and attends uni, his rouges do sadly follow him and wreck havoc. Danny is stressed from school so he doesn't do quips as much, in fact, he's trying to get this under control as fast as possible so he can go back and study. Here's the thing, no one outside of Amityville has seen Phantom so all of the sudden what seems to be a meta? an alien? something not human? coming out and taking down rouges that, due to being ghosts, other heros struggle to contain and handle.

Speculation rises about Phantom and who he is. Danny is smart and thought this through, kinda. His costume is a modified look what he wore as a kid but he pulls in more military/uniform aspects to make it seem like he belongs to someone or some organization. That maybe somewhere in the US, an organization managed to make a hero of sorts that mimics Green Lanterns. It's just a big red herring, Danny wants them to look for someone older, probably more experienced, and a different background. Not some tired college student struggling with his studies.

Things do start to get dicey when heroes actively try to interact with him, mostly the Flash (because Central City), Superman, and the Green Lantern. Most interactions end up with Phantom not wanting to fight and fleeing or when cornered to fight, he's messy and inexperienced compared to the other heroes. He doesn't stay around and rarely even talks. It's concerning more so because the heroes aren't sure with who they're dealing with and after a few interactions, they aren't sure Phantom is on their side. Just too many questions around him.

This leads to heroes actively trying to capture and bring in Phantom. The more failed attempts that happen, the more flightly Phantom acts when they end up interrupting him capturing his rouges. They do eventually capture Phantom (thank you Superman) and that's kinda where I end on information on this AU. It's just me having fun with interactions and also designing costumes :)

ALSO DANNY IS ROMA/DIDICOY I NEED TO MENTION THAT!!! (Dick Grayson 🤝 Danny Fenton being didicoy)

#dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #dc x dp #danny phantom #danny fenton #powerhouse au #mine #my art

[dangermousie]

Finished.

God, what a glorious, glorious, glorious ride, a truly solid epic drama in a way I haven't seen in a very long time - there were two other flawless cdramas for me this year - Lost You Forever 1 and The Ingenuous One - but TIO was a smaller scale story and LYF ended in medias res. AJTL was the only complete, epic cdrama this year for me, but oh boy, was it beyond.

First, my two tiny niggles - this is a drama where the 40 episode limit fit badly, like tightly pinching shoes. You can tell how they had to speed and cram to get in the resolutions of dynastic struggles in An and Wu and the war with Beipan. This drama really needed to have been 50 eps. (The cramming also resulted in the sole plot arc that made me go huh - LTG random decision to try to marry Ruyi before he rides off to what he thinks is his last battle and his just as random decision to go "oh well" and agree to release NYZ and then when NYZ shows up before he can be released because he broke out and wreaks havoc, let them walk out. Maybe if they had more time, it would have made more sense, otherwise it felt like an aberration in a character arc that before and after was consistent and made sense.) Second niggle is not really one because it's clearly due to censorship - the last minute redemption of the Wu emperor etc - the writer made is as believable as she could but you could feel the censorship sticky hands all over it.

But those are minor complaints. Overall this was solid from beginning to end, very adult and with secondary characters who all felt real and complex and interesting. A few thoughts:

Our main OTP was incredible. So adult, so competent, so badass but still feeling human. I bought that those two were larger than life legends AND flesh and blood people. And that chemistry!

I loved that this drama allowed relationships to be messy. Yes, we have our epic main couple but I especially loved what happened with Chu Yue and Shisan and LTG and Ying. I loved that neither was an epic romance. With CY and Shisan, I loved that they didn't make him realize he loves her forever blah blah - he was an incredibly consistent character - charming, loyal and utterly clear he's incapable of permanent commitment to a single woman and she never could change that. And yet he died in large part to protect her, and it's in keeping with his character and it makes sense that this solidified her remembering him forever - he's not just the one who got away, but he DIED for her. It's very clear if they both lived, this would have gone nowhere and ended with him wandering off or her moving on wanting commitment from someone who is capable of it, but as it is, it froze the possibility of love in ember.

And I loved the narrative of LTG and Ying. They both come into marriage in love with someone they can never have (Ruyi and YL), they both have similar backgrounds (royals but neglected and looked down upon), they both share the same goals (power but to take care of people) and they really are friends. I love that when we last see them, they have what is a great period marriage - no love but respect and common goals. And she still mourns YL and he probably still thinks of Ruyi but the thing is, I love that the narrative leaves the possibility of them eventually falling in love with each other (or other people) because as she tells him - you think you will always love a particular person but life is long. (And it's so true - she will remember YL until she's old, once again in part because of the unfulfilled possibility of it - but it doesn't mean she won't be able to open her heart to someone again.) It's a surprisingly hopeful ending for them and I love it. I'd totally watch a show where they discover love with each other tbh.

I did love that no character (except possibly Prince Danyang) got everything they wanted even if they emerged alive. They got some and had to give up some.

I loved what it had to say about having to be worthy of your power and position - you are not owed fealty by birth but you have to earn it. It was a surprisingly anti-imperial show for a recent cdrama.

All the deaths of our faves gutted me, none as much as Yuan Lu's. Oooof.

As to the ending, I can tell people are gonna have fits but I like it. I love many an ending legendarily reviled in cdrama fandom (Princess Agents and Novoland Eagle Flag have perfect endings in my opinion; I realize that opinion, especially about PA is enough to get me throttled in certain quarters but it is what it is) and I came to cdramas back when pretty much every costume cdrama ended horrifically tragically - think of the endings of the Chinese Paladins, The Myth (for a long time my n1 drama even though it made me cry so hard I threw up, ending-wise), The Young Warriors, Little Fairy, even Lan Ling Wang, Glory of the Tang Dynasty and Bu Bu Jing Xin if we are going somewhat later. I mean, one of my favorite dramas ever is Royal Nirvana and that ending is like drinking a thermos full of depression. This is nothing.

Honestly, I would have been fine if the ending for our OTP really was them dying pretty much together, in their different battles. That hint that they are alive and living with their kids is lovely and welcome, but I'd have been fine without it and it raises a lot of questions (though if anyone could fake their deaths and survive that sort of thing, it would have been them so fair enough.)

Anyway, this is basically my love letter to this drama. It was amazing and I am so glad I watched it.

#cdrama #a journey to love #liu shi shi #liu yuning #alen fang #fang yilun

[phoenix-of-jade]

12

In honor of SPOTIFY WRAPPED,  send me a number 1-100 and I’ll write you a starter based on the song.

Song number 12: Love the way it hurts by Cloudy June

Oh, your demons match my ghosts

Twin spirits... That was the conclusion the raven haired had came to after listening to Minjun's story about his past and the unfortunate love story he'd gone through. It was interesting how two seemingly completely different people, with completely different backgrounds, could share soo much in common, from a complicated family background characterized by messy games of power and the iron fist of parental authority, to the tragedy of losing their first loves in an unfortunate turn of events that would make said people haunt them to this day (even if the circumstances were different for each one of them, as well as the nature of the "haunting").

I'm sad as fuck you know

When Minjun told him that he couldn't let go of Joowan because he was his very first ever love, the information kind of struck a sensitive chord buried deep within Xuan's heart and soul. He could relate in a way with the lawyer's pain and struggles with moving on, because he too was haunted by a similar ghost: while he didn't lie about Cheng being some sort of 'ex', the man wasn't Xuan's only friend he'd ever gotten involved with in a seemingly romantical way.

The two had another friend with whom they both were very close, a boy named Xia, and while Xuan didn't love Cheng in a romantic manner, he did bear this kind of feelings for this boy; feelings he was too young back then to be able to fully understand what they were or what they meant, but which made Xia be the closest thing to an actual crush Xuan had ever experienced. Unfortunately, Xuan lost Xia when they were still kids, the young man dying at the ripe age of 13 and leaving the at the time 12 year old Xuan with a grueling sense of survivor's guilt. And to this day, the green eyed man blamed himself for Xia's death even if it wasn't his direct doing, living under the impression that anyone he'd grow to love ever again would end up suffering a similar fate, which made Xuan swear that he'll never love again.

You can always make it worse

Yet, cut to the present, and the time spent in the company of this stunning and clever lawyer made Xuan feel a kind of tingle he hadn't felt in literal years, something he never thought would be possible ever again. That strong feeling of compassion and empathy he felt for Minjun, paired with his respect for this handsome man's strong will and determination, had made Xuan develop a keen liking for his new business associate. In other words, he was starting to develop a new crush. But was he ready to accept this kind of feelings in his life? Was Xuan ready to allow himself to love again and welcome this still unknown feeling to nestle into his stone cold heart?

Baby I need you I need your claws on my neck I need your bitter red wine lips and dirty regrets I need your hunger Feels like you're tying me up I'm begging you for your love Begging you for your love

Before he realized it, Xuan had already started to slowly fantasize about him and his lawyer, and that did not include the business framework in the slightest! He couldn't take his mind off of Minjun's charming smile, his charismatic voice and the way his pretty lips looked soo kissable! It was strange feeling like this for someone so suddenly after he hadn't ever caught any semblance of such cravings for anyone else in literal years, not even for Cheng, with whom he had an intimate relationship after all...

Maybe it was the fact that Minjun kind of reminded him of Xia, in a way? It was true, he had black hair and brown eyes like his long departed friend, but so did many other people he'd interacted with in the past and he hadn't developed any displays of lust like this for them. Or maybe it was Minjun's charisma and very kind and selfless nature that reminded him of the young man? Xuan didn't know, but it frustrated him nevertheless. He wanted something from Minjun, that he could tell, but what exactly that something was, heck if even he knew!

Interesting enough was that the lawyer seemed to be interested in him too, or that's what Xuan thought from watching him closely during their conversations. It was bad! This only served to fuel those weird feelings and desires he was having even further! Should he even try to initiate something...?

Xuan shook his head in frustration, sighing and leant back into the chair, staring at the ceiling. Was it even worth it? What if he tries to initiate something romantic with him and Minjun rejects him? Not only would he end up hurt (especially his pride and ego), but that would also risk ruining their business relationship as well...

The raven haired heaved a deep sigh, wondering why things had to be soo complicated? And even if let's say, Minjun were to actually return these feelings of attraction, there was still the issue of his stalker ex boyfriend... Xuan furrowed his eyebrows remembering about what Minjun had told him: Joowan was a murderer and if he'd deem Xuan as competition, he might attempt 'eliminating' him the best way murderers know...

But how can I make me not want you now? Can I make me not go to your house?

But when was he ever afraid of death to begin with? Xuan let out a self-ironic snort. The idea sounded soo stupid in comparison to his lifestyle: he was dealing with the threat of death on a daily, such was the life of a powerful mob leader such as himself. So what was one more assassination threat on top of the already long list looming over his head? Xuan wasn't a scarredy cat. He'd never fret in the face of danger and that wasn't something that would change now. If he wanted Minjun, he could've as well gone for it! Xuan wasn't going to let anyone get in his way and if worse came to worse, he was sure that at least he could rid the lawyer of this annoying pain in the ass.

Baby I crave you I crave your taste in the night (...) And it's rushing from my feet to the back of my head

That thought in mind, Xuan smirked to himself a sinister smile. Yeah, he wasn't going to back down and give up that easily! When he wanted something, he was the type of man that wouldn't refrain from doing almost anything to get that something and if that bastard was even going to think to stand between him and Minjun, Xuan was going to show Joowan what it meant challenging the Green Eyed Death himself.

So yeah, he was going to actually go to Minjun house tonight and finally do what he's been craving to do for quite a while now. Once that decision set, there wasn't turning Xuan back from it and he was going to make sure that nothing, and really nothing, would stand between him and his goal! Those were the very thoughts traversing Xuan's mind as he stared at the shiny revolver glistening in the dim light of the study, before placing it in its holster, concealed nicely underneath his shirt and pants at his back.

Oh, your demons match my ghosts I'm sad as fuck you know You can always make it worse But I love the way it Hurts and maybe that's my curse Come and drag me through the dirt You can always make it worse But I love the way it hurts It hurts It hurts But I love the way it hurts It hurts Oh it hurts

Indeed, they were twin spirits attracting one another and for that reason they should have been together... Xuan wan't one to give up without a fight and even if this would've ended up hurting him in any shape or form, he was more than willing to take that pain. After all, wasn't he the type who liked a little bit of pain anyways?

Cheeky grin played at the corners of his lips and his emerald eyes shined with the glow of a hungry predator ready to go after its pray, as the raven haired exited the office. Let the hunt of the night begin!

#xuan interactions #seoulxsinners #Xuan x Minjun #precious lawyer #v1: main

[crumble-stew]

I wanna hear about your PDh rewrite

whats like, the plot your going for

HELLO HI!!!

I’d like to preface this by saying I’m a super busy student in my A-Level year so I’m not actually making it. But I can make comics and explain the plot theoretically on tumblr :D

First of all it’s Katemau centric because I’m a useless bisexual.

Now more importantly, there’s two main schools in this, Phoenix Drop High and O’Kasis Academy. It’s also sort of following MCD in a more direct way? I’ll run down all the main cast

Aphmau Floraz - Age 16. She has been homeschooled her whole life and is super stoked to be attending high school. Attends PDH and gets up to general protag shenanigans.

Aaron Lycan - Age 18. Aaron is not a love interest! He’s still FC but they meet online while she’s at PDH and not before. They’re nerdy gamer friends and I <3 them. Platonic nerd aarmau for the soul

Katelyn Adhikari - Age 16. APH’S LOVE INTEREST!!! Katelyn used to attend O’Kasis Academy where she was captain of the girl’s football (soccer) team and also on the student council, run by Zane. Some shit goes down and it all ends with Zane getting Jeffery expelled and triggering a series of events that makes Katelyn want to leave. She now attends PDH and is on the football team there. She’s also Ivy’s ex :0

Nana Ishida - Age 15. Nana is a member of the baking club!! She wants to go to a technical college to become a patisserie chef and she often struggles with not being as academic as some of her friends. Lucinda is always around to give her a pep talk if she’s really struggling :,). She’s also dating Danté. She likes anime but she goes by her own name not Kawaii-Chan. Liking anime is what she bonds with Aphmau over

Danté Captain - Age 15. Danté is not gross in my rewrite, and is much more like his MCD counterpart!! After a messy breakup with Nicole, he was a bit sceptical about dating someone. However, he bonded with Nana over failing a maths test and they really hit it off. He’s really good at boxing but so far he’s never beaten Gene

Lucinda Claire - Age 16. Lucinda is an icon. She’s still a witch and she’s part of like. The main girl four (Aphmau, Katelyn, Nana and Lucinda). She’s been friends with Nana for years and the two are a very chaotic team. Teachers are warned to sit them across the room from each other when they first start, and they turn everything into a competition. Lucinda also knows how to comfort someone after a breakup or smthn, but does not do well with her own.

Laurance Zvahl - Age 17. Laurance captains the guys football (again, soccer) team and he is super messy lol. Ask him about his middle school emo phase and you are DEAD (not really, he’ll just laugh it off, then ask that you don’t mention it). Not much has changed here, but again he’s not a love interest for Aphmau really? I don’t like love triangle stuff too much so I wanna make it more slow burn adjacent. He was adopted by Hayden when he was super young and if you hurt Cadenza he will hate you forever. He did also used to roll with Gene and co

Gene Captain (18), Sasha Smyth (17), and Zenix Martinez-Jones (15) are the shadow knights still!!! They’re sort of Gene’s weird loner group, not much has changed here. Gene wants to be a boxer, Sasha gets away with everything because of her 4.0 and Zenix wears trousers 5 sizes too big for him. They’re silly.

Ivy Vernon (16) and Janus Argan (17) are kinda background antagonists for a bit??? Ivy is Katelyn’s ex and the head of the OKA girls hockey team. She’s an absolute menace . Janus is Zane’s close friend and always wants the best for him. He ends up with Zane. Janus is on the American football team.

Travis Valkrum - Age 16. I almost forgot about Travis because I do not like him at all. No Travlyn here whatsoever lmao. I will lean into the sweetheart thing he had going on in pdh!! Basically a ray of sunshine, and things pickup lines are so suave and cool. He’s really interested in classical music.

THE ROMEAVE BROTHERS: here is where we get really messy and find some main conflict

Garroth Ro’Meave - Age 18. Also no longer a love interest. Garroth Ro’Meave has a heart of gold and is always trying his best. He absolutely loves sports and board games. He could not stand his father and ran away from home in the summer between Junior and Senior year. He enrolled himself at PDH and cannot legally be made to return home, and this sets up a lot of the conflict. Garté is a very famous businessman and politician and the tabloids are finding it hard to avoid discussing the family drama, especially with Vylad being public news. Garrance is also endgame

Zane Ro’Meave - Age 16. Debate team. Anyone who knows me knows I love Zane, and I am so normal about him in this. He’s the student council head (the SC is the Jury, idk if I made that clear) at O’Kasis academy until Garté gets really antsy to get Garroth back. Garté basically forcefully transfers Zane to PDH and says he can’t go back to O’Kasis Academy until Garroth comes home. Character development and chaos ensues, while he’s finally forced to face everyone he’s hurt and his feelings about his dad. Much less importantly, Zane gets a boyfriend by the end. It’s Janus (as in the silver death), who’s been his friend the whole time.

Vylad Ro’Meave Fletcher - Age 15. Sick of her husband, Zianna had an affair with another guy. Garté didn’t like how dissimilar Vylad looked to him and forced her to get a DNA test. He basically forced Zianna to give Vylad up, and he’s currently staying in a foster home. It’s public knowledge that he is a Ro’Meave, but it’s just not really talked about in a serious context (kinda Boris Johnson’s kids). Suddenly he’s at the same school as his two older brothers and getting to reconnect with them, and it’s all a lot at once. He’s also the person who convinced Sylvanna that Aphmau should come to PDH on an open day.

It’d be kinda Sex Education vibes??? More than one main character and it focuses on all their conflicts, but the overarching story is Katemau and the conflict between Zane and Garroth, both of which would come to a peak on the night of the winter dance :)

IM SO SORRY THIS IS SO LONG!!! If you have any questions or characters you’re curious about hmu

#phoenix drop high #aphmau #crumble’s pdh rewrite #garroth ro'meave #zane ro’meave #vylad ro’meave #aaron lycan #katelyn aphmau #lucinda aphmau #ivy the venom scythe #janus the silver death #laurence zvahl #nana ishida #kawaii chan #gene aphmau #dante aphmau #travis valkrum #IM SO SORRY THIS IS SO LONG

[mythos05reviews]

4.5/5 stars

I was scared to read this book as I feared being disappointed by its aro-ace representation. The books that have both Aro and Ace represented in them are rare to find, and it is even harder to know if the representation will be accurate. Overall, I was not disappointed by how they were represented in this book. I was really able to relate to Georgia and her messy journey to self-discovery.

This book did a great job of portraying friendship as being just as important as love. Although Georgia, Sunil, Jason, Rooney, and Pip had very different backgrounds and struggles, they still didn't manage to overshadow each other. Throughout the book, we do focus more on Georgia, and we see how she explores her identity. From confusion to self-acceptance, this book was an emotional rollercoaster.

We start the book with Georgia being hopeful of finding love. This is best represented by:

I loved romance. Always had. I loved Disney. I loved fanfiction. I loved thinking about what my own wedding would be like. I just. Loved. Love.

As someone who grew up watching Disney movies and reading fanfiction, it was very easy for me to understand why Georgia had these expectations and why she put herself in situations in which she felt awkward and uncomfortable. Spoiler: Although it's easy to dislike her for using Jason as a way to get experience, you can still understand that she was genuinely trying to fall in love. Conflicts could have been avoided with her friends if they had talked it out. Pip's anger was understandable, but she could have been more mature about the problem. It was a bit convenient to have a cousin who is an ace/aro, but it worked out. 

The realization about how heteronormativity affected her really hit home in my case. I could relate to a lot of her thoughts, from being scared of ending up alone to realizing I only know about love in theory. 

In the end, that was the problem with romance. It was so easy to romanticize romance because it was everywhere. It was in music and on TV and in filtered Instagram photos. It was in the air, crisp and alive with fresh possibility. It was in falling leaves, crumbling wooden doorways, scuffed cobblestones, and fields of dandelions. It was in the touch of hands, scrawled letters, crumpled sheets, and the golden hour. A soft yawn, early morning laughter, shoes lined up together by the door. Eyes across a dance floor. I could see it all, all the time, all around, but when I got closer, I found nothing was there. A mirage

Overall, this is what made me rate it 4 stars. Even if you aren't an aro or ace, you can still resonate with this book. Anyone who hasn't found their label yet or is still trying to figure out their sexuality should read this book. This book goes over the process of what it feels like to try and figure out one's identity. It shows how helpful it can be to figure out who you are.

#loveless #bookaholic #bookshelf #book review #tumblr #lgbtq #queer #loveless alice oseman #ace representation #alice oseman #good representation #arospec #aroace #aro positivity #aromanticism #aromantism #asexual #acespec #queer community #queer fiction #.

[pianocat939]

Uh because someone asked for this- just a messy background on my Jiang Shi Donnie-

Ok so he first starts out in China, (because the monster Jiang Shi is from China) and bro is seen as almost a deity because he's not human. At that point, he's not necessarily a ruler, but he does take heavy importance on the land's decisions and all that shit.

Despite being seen as a higher entity by the people, he was actually a pretty lonely man (not that he would outwardly admit it) because he loved science~ And since it was the Qing dynasty of China (1634-1919...?) there's not much technology as one would think. The year when he's originally alive is like idk 1600-1700's. Hence once you actually get him to be nice he's very clingy.

One day, he ends up being poisoned by some person who hates him and his brothers are obviously devastated- and ask some Taoist priests to do their weird ritual shit as they put him into a coffin. But you see, right before they put him in the coffin, they put this paper charm on him because again, ritual weird shit.

And so he's buried for a long time.

Now here's an interesting fact about the Jiang Shi, it's not just some fun little thing that people made up, lots of scholars actually thought they existed and had certain cases to become a said Jiang Shi. In Donnie's case, let's say it's because his spirit hasn't left yet due to an unaccomplished life (which is a case said by scholars) mainly his need for vengeance because he was poisoned out of nowhere.

And in terms of where he wakes up, it can literally be any scenario you can imagine. So I'll leave that up to you. (I like to say people dug him up and stole his coffin + his body before he woke up)

So when he wakes up 300 years after his initial death, he is absolutely feral from his rage at being poisoned. So he kinda goes out into the woods to become this bloodthirsty being trying to reclaim his humane traits after being dead for so long and how everything he has known changes.

He's scared of humans because the memory of being killed lives in his mind (because remember, he never learned who poisoned him). And he's really skeptical of modern appliances too- so he mostly just chills in the wild since it's closer to his early life.

He struggles to speak any form of language: 1. not speaking it for so long 2. his memory is slightly fuzzy (but he does remember his death very well)

I think that's basically it...? Other than he's really just a pissy lonely feral monster who would love some headpats.

#blurbs #jiang shi donnie #rottmnt #tmnt #donnie #rise donnie

[zujime]

Imagine Josuke confessing his love to his female crush at a house party leading them to a steamy make-out session (tongues and all) while the song "Canned Heat" by Jamiroquai plays in the background.

CANNED HEAT

josuke x f!reader ￫  [w.c – 0.53k]

CW ￫ not really sfw, make out, house party, aged up, confession

unedited and possible grammar errors

A/N ￫ i decided to make this a little drabble, if you don’t mind. i hope you enjoy also the song was a bop bro! shaking ass to it as we speak🤪

You'd been dragged to this little party by a friend who had already left you astray. Plastic cup in hand and all it held was watered down soda that you doubt you'd ever get to since social gathering weren't really on your list of things to do, at least not right now at this minute.

The sound of laughter and chatter nearly growing louder than the funky music that played on the cassette deck and the stench of cigars and cigarettes becoming too profound for your liking, so for some fresh air you decide to head outside. The refreshing humidity of the air gently meeting your skin as you lean back on the house's exterior.

You're finally able to think, but the faint sound of whispers and the front door opening and closing, a somewhat tall man stumbling out and turning back to scold who ever had pushed him out, but stopped when he met your soft eyes. His face flushed a bright pink as he struggles to let out a simple "hey", hands stuffed in his pants as his eyes bounced everywhere, lips sealed tight as he tried to think of something else to say.

You chuckle out a greeting back, shifting to stand up straight and meet his anxious orbs. "So...what're you doing here?" He questioned, clearing his throat every now and again. "A friend dragged me along and they seem to be having the time of their life right now," you nod towards the window, the faint cheers mixed with the music that played was all that was heard. "And what about you? You don't look like you came for the party either." Your voice entrancing as he tries to catch himself from saying anything stupid. "Err... I guess you could say the same for me. I'm not really a party person." He laugh a little too loudly.

"Really? I could've sworn I saw someone who looked just like you showing off a few moves." You giggle as his face heats up, eyes blown wide as he tries to find something to say to prove you wrong, but all you say is a "it's fine, besides, you had some pretty nice moves." Your body growing closer to his, so close that you could hear his breath hitch and how he'd constantly swallow whatever saliva had built up, sweat threatening to drip from his face as struggles to stare into your orbs.

"I hope this doesn't ruin the moment, but I-I've liked you for some time and-" The softness of your plump lips bringing his sentence to a close. His hands finding their place on your hips as yours on his neck, his body relaxing to your touch as he pushes you closer into him. The kiss was messy but intoxicating, his tongue pleading to explore your mouth and you let him, let your tongues circle and dance with one another, saliva mixing in the process but the sweet kiss soon comes to an end, leaving your lips swollen.

A smile growing on your lips as you whisper a "can I get your name?" He'd still been a bit dazed but ushered out a small "yeah" before giving you an answer.

#[♪]. josuke #josuke higashikata #josuke higashikata x reader #josuke x reader #josuke x y/n #josuke higashikata smut #jojo’s bizarre adventure #jojo #jjba #jojo smut #jjba smut #jojo part 4 #jjba diu #diamond is unbreakable smut #diamond is unbreakable #jojo not sfw #jjba not sfw #jojo x reader #jjba x y/n #jjba x reader

[splishsplashyouropinionistrash]

AFTG Fic Recs

After receiving several recommendations for AFTG fics, I decided to compile a list of my own favorites so far. All of these are on AO3.

1. it would have been you by thereisnothis ~ 

Jerejean oneshot

TW: major character death, suicide

“Jeremy should have known. He should have fucking known. All the signs were there. How could he have been so blind?”

Short and painful fic where Jean never recovers from the Raven’s Nest and Jeremy is left to pick up the pieces. I sobbed violently. 

2. Scribbles and Sticky Notes by Fortheloveofexy

Andriel oneshot

TW: major character death

“It started soon after Andrew’s official retirement from Exy.”

A painful hurt/comfort fic after Neil is injured and forced to retire. Another one that made me sob uncontrollably.

3. Teach Me How To Heal by foundinthedark

Jerejean, 1/7 parts published, last updated 7-28-22

TW: panic attacks, mental illness, and all the fun stuff that comes with Jean

“After Jean Moreau struggles at practice, his therapist suggests he starts a seven-day self-esteem journal to get him back on track. “

Jean learning to be happy after coming out of the Nest (with Jeremy’s help). It melts my heart-

4. assorted cannon/post-cannon compliant aftg brainrot by mostly_maudlin

a series of oneshots about the Foxes, check out the TW for individual stories

5. In Which Neil Josten is a PR Nightmare by CoverYourEyes

Andriel, 16/? parts published, last updated 7-27-22

TW: None, surprisingly

“the one where Neil does what he wants, picks fights with reporters, discovers Twitter, breaks the internet, and really shouldn't be allowed out of his house. Andrew does nothing to discourage him.”

Post-cannon from an OC’s perspective (his publicist). Kept me up cackling at ungodly hours of the night.

6. never fallen (from quite this high) by crystalcrow

Andriel, 43/43 parts published

TW: All the fun cannon-typical warnings

“For most people, a problem is a matter or situation regarded as unwelcome or harmful that needs to be dealt with or overcome. For Andrew Minyard, it’s the word that fits Neil Josten with a capital P.”

It’s the series from Andrew’s POV, what else do I need to say? A must-read for AFTG fans.

7. Hoax by gus_47

Jerejean, 26/? parts published, last updated 8-01-22

TW: recreational drug use, all the fun stuff that comes with Jean (he deserves a break, oh my god)

“ Jean's first year with the Trojans / a recollection of his last year with the Ravens”

It’s a Jerejean after the Ravens fic, fairly self-explanatory (and fairly heartbreaking so far)

8. goodbye, family by queenDay05

Background Andriel oneshot

TW: mentions of death

“the day before his countdown ends, Neil films a video. it's an apology, a goodbye. for the foxes.”

Neil knows he’s dying, so he leaves a goodbye for the foxes. Utterly heartbreaking.

9. don’t say goodbye by queenDay05

Background Andriel oneshot

TW: mentions of death

“the foxes reaction's to Neil's goodbye video“

Sequel to goodbye, family after the riot when the Foxes realize Neil’s missing and find the video he left them. Somehow more heartbreaking than the first.

10. Innominate by Major_816

Andriel, Jerejean, Ichirou x OC, 17/74 parts published, last updated 7-24-22

TW: mental illness, mafia shit, and general aftg warnings

“An AU where Mary never got Nathaniel out. Instead, he became too invaluable of an asset to be killed off or 'gifted' to Tetsuji. Instead, he's raised with Ichirou and Jean as a part of Ichirou's inner circle. He'd always had a knack for languages and lying and all the 'messy stuff' came easily enough when your father is called the Butcher of Baltimore. So Nathaniel became the Wraith. He was untraceable, unknowable, infalliable; a criminal fairytale. When Kevin Day leaves the Nest, there's no better person to send.”

Neil is in the mafia (and he’s a total badass). Big found-family vibes, a good mix of fluff and angst. One of the best fics I’ve ever read, I am begging you to go read it.

11. Let’s make things interesting by Nico4undead 

Andriel, background Jerejean, 16/? parts published, last updated 6-24-22 (might not be abandoned, author is slow to update)

TW: Nothing, I think (shocking, I know)

“Andreil, after they both join a pro Exy team. Neil suggests they make things a little more interesting and don't necessarily tell anyone about their relationship, just act as they usually would. Cue the Minyard/Josten rivalry and basically just Andrew and Neil being little shits and thoroughly enjoying making everyone think they can't stand each other.”

Andriel after Palmetto. You will laugh, you will cry, and you will laugh some more. It’s hilarious and fluffy and heartwarming (while staying cannon-compliant).

Well, there you go! A list of every AFTG fic I read and enjoyed since figuring out how to use AO3 five days ago (do I have a problem? maybe). 

Hugs and kisses, my loves. Go read about our gays <3

#all for the game #aftg #the foxhole court #tfc #aftg fic #aftg fic recs #fic rec #andreil #jerejean #splishsplash originals #splishsplash recs

[pb-dot]

Film Friday: Event Horizon

Fun fact: Time is an illusion and I keep forgetting what weekday it is, but anyway: This October, I've decided to dedicate my FF entries to horror movies that I feel deserve a little more attention. First up to bat is none other than the best space horror movie that doesn't feature Sigourney Weaver and Ian Holm, the infamous Event Horizon.

In the real world, an Event Horizon is the zone around a black hole where the gravity is so strong that not even light can escape, and as such we cannot observe what's going on there in any meaningful way. In retrospect, it was perhaps unwise to name the ship built to take humanity's first Faster Than Light journey by performing a jump by using experimental gravity technology after the phenomenon, but hindsight, as they say, is 20/20.

The story follows the salvage crew on the salvage vessel Lewis & Clark who are sent to recover the Event Horizon. The Horizon has, after a lengthy absence in Parts Unknown, jumped back towards Sol and is now caught in Jupiter's gravity well and showing no signs of life. Along for the ride is Dr. Weir, the troubled physicist whose work was instrumental in the gravity drive that took the Even Horizon out of charted space, and indeed regular space itself.

One thing in particular I like is that the movie takes the form of a journey from a haunted house in space to something considerably more Hellraiser-esque. Something in the ship, or perhaps the ship itself, has been changed by the journey, and its effect on its former crew is messy and unsettling, to say the least. For the first two acts, it's all about having a Bad Feeling About This Place and Weir growing steadily more unreliable as events escalate from the expected search and salvage mission into a desperate struggle to survive in a location that very much wants you vivisected, surrounded by the mercilessly uninhabitable world of Open Space.

Things turn Hellraiserways bit by bit as we're offered recordings of the Event Horizon's former crew, there's a very notable change of tone. Turns out that the ship's journey outside of normal space took it on a jaunt through hell or some secular equivalent of the same, and the things the crew did to themselves and each other are gruesome and kept just vague enough to leave a little room for the imagination to do some gnarly work.

There's actually some controversy around these scenes, and a rumor of a longer "uncut" version of the scenes have achieved a sort of "La Fin Absolute du Monde" genre nerd infamy. For my money, I think less is some times more, and the brief flashes of the atrocities we get to see are more than enough to establish that the movie isn't fucking around and force the tone from "Man this ship sure is spooky" to "WE! HAVE! TO! GET! OFF! THE! HELL! SHIP!" which is honestly what it's there for.

If I'm honest, restraint isn't really a thing the movie deals with outside of these scenes. The third act features some rather notable scenery-chewing by Sam Neil's Dr. Weir going full Store Brand Cennobite, and although he doesn't go quite as hard into the realm of ham, Laurence Fishburn also left the more subtle acting tools at the door for the movie's climax. It isn't bad per se, and it leads up to one of my beloved Hard-Earned W's Against Evil-endings, but it does leave me wishing Neil had either dialed it down a little to allow for meanance, or somehow went even more bombastic and reached that humanity-transcending intensity that he's trying for but not quite hitting.

Before I close up, I want to talk briefly about sound design. Event Horizon doesn't do much out of the ordinary, except for making some truly memorable soundscapes of Hellish Mayhem, and the sound of our heroes beating Dr Weir with some sort of Sci-Fi Tube being truly hilarious. One sound design decision I really like, however, is the background noise. There's a persistent bassy drone sound present in the first two acts or so of the movie, barely audible without amping the bass, and it's a simple, but clever move to unsettle your audience, because this almost-hearing-it does make our lizard brains get all sorts of wibbly.

So, in closing, Even Horizon is good messy fun. It's the kind of sci fi horror I feel we get in both games and books, but almost never in movies. It's probably because making dimensions of suffering and haunted space ships look good in the movies on a B-movie budget is easier said than done, and while I do love Event Horizon and know little about its budget and box office, I kinda doubt it made its money back. It's a shame, and probably one of the reasons we're not getting more of these, but boy howdy is it fun.

#cinema #event horizon #horror movie #peebs recommends #sci fi horror #1990s movies

[semper-legens]

154. Berlin, by Jason Lutes

Owned: No, library Page count: 558 My summary: Berlin, 1929. A young art student arrives in the city for the first time, ready to learn and make her life in the big city. But there are rumblings in the background, political struggles about to boil over. Communists and Nazis are clashing in the streets, a violent conflict that leads to lives lost. The city's Jewish families are aware of their safety slipping away, bit by bit. And things can only get worse from there... My rating: 4/5 My commentary:

This one was a bit of an impulse grab, I'll admit. I always like to take a punt on the graphic novels that come through work, particularly when they're more indie titles (by which I basically mean not Marvel or DC) and they look interesting. This is a graphic novel set in Weimar Republic Berlin, after World War One but before the rise of the Nazi party, following a small group of disparate people and their lives across the different strata of German society. We have a young woman who comes to the city to study art, and ends up with an older man…and then a fellow female student. A reasonably well-off Jewish family struggling against the rising tide of antisemitism. A single mother who gets in with a Communist group, then ends up being shot at a protest and leaving her young daughter to the streets. And those are just a few of the graphic novel's expansive cast. It's got a lot of ambition - but how is it to read?

Overall, really good! Weimar Republic Berlin is a really interesting snapshot of history, and I think this graphic novel really captures the spirit of the time throughout its disparate characters. For example, while the Jewish family are doing okay, we can see Germany becoming more and more antisemitic as the story goes on, and know the context for what is about to happen. We get the points of view of centrists, socialists, Communists, nationalists, and straight-up Nazis - the latter never being portrayed as in the right, overall the Communists are more sympathetic in their portrayal, though nobody really comes up smelling of roses. One thing I found really cool was the portrayal of the LGBT+ scene. Weimar Germany was as close to a good place to be LGBT+ as one might get in this time period - sure, you're still doing illegal things, but there was a bit more community and tolerance than in other places. We see this with the student and her girlfriend, who the reader might be forgiven for assuming she's a man in early scenes, as she dresses in a suit and has short hair. There's a hint that there might be something trans going on there, something the character doesn't really have the language to explain, but is nonetheless present. We also get to see the hot new thing - jazz, by authentic Black musicians! And also the perils of being a Black American in this kind of place. History is messy, and sometimes ugly, but there's joy and hope to be found - though the story here is often grim and realistic, it's never without light and happiness, which really balances the more serious moments well.

But then there's my criticisms of the book. Largely, this boils down to the ambitious scope - there's a lot of characters being juggled here, both invented and real, and it's sometimes difficult to keep track of who's who and what everyone's story is, particularly when their lives intersect. In all fairness, I could always remember the main bullet points, such as the student, the young orphan, the Jewish family, et cetera. It's just that there were a lot of people to keep track of, not helped by the fact that many of them are drawn pretty similarly or don't have features that are particularly distinct from the others, so with my admittedly-poor memory for faces it was often a struggle to fit names and stories to faces. I will admit that's partially a me problem, however. But really, that's all there was to mar my enjoyment of this graphic novel. There was a lot to like here, and I'm really glad I picked it up.

Next, back to my favourite ever book series, to see what fresh bulls--- the House of Night can bring.

#Berlin #Jason Lutes #bookblr #book blog #book blogger #4

[siriusly-sapphic]

Siricissa: 2, 4, 11, 14, 19, 28. I did very much struggle with not just asking you to answer all of them

Send me ship asks!

Oh my god so many Caitie I love you

2: Do they have a dynamic trope? (enemies to lovers, sunshine x grumpy, etc?)

As complicated and messy as they are, yeah for sure there are some tropes they fall into. They're both Friends to Lovers and also Lovers to Enemies, but also Enemies with Benefits. They also perfectly go with the whole bad boy/good girl thing, and I love that for them.

4: What’s their favorite sleeping/cuddling positions?

It's kind of rare for them to be in a situation, generally, where they can fall asleep together and it's not just one of them leaving in the middle of night after they've had sex. But when it happens, or in happier AUs where they're actually more officially together, they are definitely that couple that falls asleep all entwined. They both live with this idea that this is temporary even if it feels all-consuming, so they're quite attached to each other in every way? She falls asleep with her head on his chest (judging his tattoos but being comforted by the sight of them), he holds her and he cusses at her because her hair gets everywhere. When they wake up, they're close enough to fuck again just about immediately. Win win.

11: What’s a song that describes their relationship? Or, what’s the song that they’ve deemed “their” song?

There are so many that describe them it's hard to choose damn. I'm gonna give you two.

I Bet My Life by Imagine Dragons

I know I took the path that you would never want for me I know I let you down, didn't I? Now remember when I told you that's the last you'll see of me Remember when I broke you down to tears I know I took the path that you would never want for me I gave you hell through all the years I've told a million lies but now I tell a single truth There's you in everything I do I bet my life on you

Why Do You Love Me by Charlotte Lawrence

Hate your friends I hate your mom and dad I hope they hate me back I guess for once, I'm being honest Got to be a lot that's wrong with you To want to be with me It's kind of sweet Apologize, never apologize You hate the way I lie So here you go, I'm being honest Narcissist, come on, give us a kiss Let's have some fun with it

14: Who does fashion shows after a mall trip and who watches and compliments them?

Both. They are dramatic and fashionable and they love it and they love encouraging it in each other (with a healthy or unhealthy dose of mockery). They also go shopping together and do fashion show offs in the changing rooms, and end up having a quickie in one of them. Bless silencing charms.

19: How do they silently/subtly express their love for each other?

Narcissa has a thing about subtly Fixing things about the people she loves, like fixing their sleeves or their hair or readjusting their collar or tie, stuff like that. Small things that show she is watching, noticing, and caring about you. He always tells her off because he likes looking like he doesn't care about his appearance (even though he cares and everyone knows it), but he notices when she's mad at him and stops doing it and it always hurts a bit.

I think a big show of quietly saying how much they love each other and care for each other, is how they treat each other after a big fight. Their fights get nasty and explosive and they get hurt, they bleed, they scar, they know what to say to emotionally fuck each other up. When the fight's over, Sirius takes his wand and Narcissa doesn't flinch because she knows he's going to stop the cut on her cheek from scarring, and she recognises the hatred and the fear in his eyes from when she told him he's just like his mother and she reassures him that he's nothing like her (even though she thinks it's a lie).

28: What’s something that reminds them of their partner(s)? Do they have anything on them daily as a reminder (a photo, phone background, tattoo, clothing/accessory, etc)?

Okay so nothing too obvious, they try not to because yknow it'd be a whole Thing if someone found out. She's not walking around with his picture in her locket. But I do ofc like the idea of him getting a daffodil tattoo, and he gets it because it'll piss her off and she'll love and hate it, and it's not a connection that most people would immediately make. He has a bunch of other tattoos, so a small flower doesn't get noticed much. Narcissa has a Black family heirloom in the form of a ring or a necklace or something, which no one would think more of than being from her family, but holds significance to her because it's something Sirius nicked from his mother's collection when Narcissa transitioned so he could give it to her.

They also carry a lot of scars on their bodies that are leftovers from nasty fights and rough sex. There are ones that Sirius wears proudly and people tend to assume they're just from the war or from other partners, and ones that Narcissa glamours to hide. Lucius occasionally kisses her skin where she knows she has a scar from Sirius, and he has no idea but she loves it.

#sirius black #narcissa malfoy #marauders era #siricissa #sirius x narcissa #blackcest #headcanons #answered asks #caitiespersonalhell

[dr-drea]

Adding to that whole Finn characterization thing, the writers also broke with the Skam tradition of the typical narrative structure of the seasons, where at least in one episode, the love interest is in focus. I guess most of you are familiar with this anyways, but i'll try to shortly explain how a Skam season is (typically) structured.

Episodes 1 -3: establish our main and their character traits, the situation they find themselves currently in, their family background, their hobbies etc.; they also hint at potential struggles, which is why a lot of theory making by the fans is happening here; and, of course, they show us who is going to be the love interest.

Episodes 4 - 7: we can see our main struggling with the themes established before, but also some achievements and happy moments (usually the first kiss, or getting together with the LI); there are some up's and downs in the plot and at the end of this bumpy ride, we also have a pretty clear idea what the love interest is like, and we are guessing about their central struggle.

Episode 8, also known as hellweek: Now, our LIs struggle is clearly pointed out, leading to an accumulation of both the main's and the love interest's problems; this is leaving the main as desparate as never before. Gradually tho, they manage their way out of the mess so that...

in Episode 9, the love interest is in focus. In the case of newly established relationships, we see the main dealing and overcoming their own problems, and then fighting for the Love Interest, to get back together with them (the only exeption here is the Hannah/Eva season, which ends with a breakup, but we still learn a lot about Jonas' character and background story in the last two episodes).

Finally, Episode 10 is where all storylines come together, eventual side conflicts are resolved, everyone is happy.

Let's go back to the current season and how Finn is (not) in focus here.

The topics established in the first three episodes can still be considered the main topics of the season, though we all agree they were handled messy and weirdly. And I do think, up to episode three, the season was quite okay.

But episode 4 - 7 do not provide us with a coherent 'up and down' of the Failin relationship, but rather with a messy, incoherent construction of both characters and that love relationship, which also in later scenes seemed underdeveloped. That resulted in almost nobody rooting for them to get together.

Both episode 7 and 8 seemed like hellweek for Mailin (and Zoe), and while Mailin got really tangled up in her own problems, I don't see a central struggle for Finn.

That Mailin is avoiding him? That's HER problem, not his, anyone would have been annoyed by that.

Him feeling like a 'tryout boyfriend' is also not really his problem, but kind of the conclusion of how Mailin has treated him so far.

So again, a reactive characterization.

And now we are at the end of episode 9, and I don't see the drama ending?? And I also don't really see Mailin 'fighting' for Finn, or how the plot takes Finns feelings/struggles into consideration. It is all about Mailin.

And that might be one of the central mistakes that were made during this season. Having it solely revolve around a white, skinny, heterosexual, neurotypical girl, a character who we have seen over and over in the media landscape. Making her BY FAR the most privileged character in the series, by also giving her a high socio-economic status, and then barely reflecting her privileges. And that, while having an extremely diverse friend group around her, whose stories even centered around not having these privileges, being discriminated against and disadvantaged. And on top of that, having these characters doing nothing, but praising her.

With everything happening, the writers and creators of S8 are completely ignoring thoughtfully made casting choices and previously established storylines.

I'm so done with this season, and tired of criticizing it, but especially the last aspect I wanted to point out again, as it bothers me a lot.

#druck mailin #druck s8 #druck #finn nguyen #mailin richter #media criticism #long post #i promise this is the last one #but it BOTHERS me #edit: fixed a typo #i wrote this in the middle of the night don't judge me

[daedalusdavinci]

ok im gonna answer this and then im gonna go to bed but my beloved @dubiousfruitsalad has requested one of those journal things and im going to try and deliver

Put “📓” or some other version of a book emoji into my inbox and I’ll explain the plot of a fanfiction that I haven’t written but daydream about.

you know for a while i actually wanted to write a sequel to tactical retreat (which, for those who dont know, is a medievalstuck dvekat fic where karkat is a knight and dave is a farmer who inspires him to leave his traumatic job and accept that his dream has changed over the years and tbh i think its still pretty well written i just reread it recently and i really had so many genius comedic moments w that fic tbh sollux is ICONIC but thats neither here nor there (read my fic))

in the first chapter i introduced a character named dave, nicknamed "crow", who was another knight who worked with karkat and frequently had guard duty watching over the prince, john. this was supposed to be davesprite and was a setup for a johndavesprite fic i was going to write after i finished tactical retreat, which was going to focus on a much more traditional knight/prince dynamic bc i am, unfortunately, such a sucker for that kind of thing. i think moreso than any other kid, john fits really well in the role of a prince striving to live up to his dads legacy but chafing uncomfortably under the role as someone who just loves pranks and screwing around. dave is, obviously, such a good knight character, and davesprite and john in particular have such a complicated and tragic relationship in canon where davesprite gave up his whole timeline and ruined his own life just to save john, without ever getting to meet his own john in person, and then for him to butt heads so hard with the john he saved, its just so. ugh. i feel a lot of ways about it. theyre perfect to me. i love a messy relationship

in this au crow/davesprite was going to be an immigrant from derse who immigrated when he was very young and had to work very hard to get his position in the knights, which is part of the reason why he and karkat get along so well, as they both come from similar backgrounds and similarly struggled to prove themselves. hes known john since they were relatively young as dadbert thought it was important for john to train alongside the knights, so theyre extremely close despite how often they drove each other crazy as kids. its very much a situation of john looking towards his future with creeping horror and leaning heavily on crow while he tries to balance his fathers expectations with his desire to cling to youth. on top of that, as they grow out of some of their younger immaturity and into themselves, theres a steadily growing attraction between them that theyre carefully and delicately trying to navigate when they both know johns position wont allow it.

ultimately, however, i ended up scrapping the whole thing as i got further and further into writing tactical retreat, so it never made it past an idea. the message of tactical retreat was so anti knights and blatantly used knights as an allegory for governmental force and police, and i just didnt feel good about writing a followup fic that glamorized knights the way the dvejohn fic wouldve required. i felt like it wouldve undermined what i worked so hard to convey. i still like the story idea, but it definitely doesnt have any place within the tactical retreat universe. however, you can absolutely still see the traces of that idea in the first chapter.

this is unfortunately far, far from the only time i have ever written a fic with the intention of writing a sequel that i never actually wrote. im just following the dopamine babey

#asks #tactical retreat #dubiousfruitsalad #i dunno if this is exactly what you awnted but i am REALLY tired #and im really struggling to remember any RECENT ideas

[jaeleess]

✦ CHA EUN-WOO, CIS MALE, HE/HIM ✦ LEE JAE-HYUN the TWENTY-SEVEN year old has been in Hidehill for HIS ENTIRE LIFE and was a ONE NIGHT STAND to Jade Parker, the missing first murder victim. Whispers on the streets are that the OWNER OF THE PET DOCTOR who lives in HOVE LAKE. He is said to be INTELLIGENT and NONCOMMITTAL but I guess we’ll find out for ourselves. 

FULL NAME: Jae-hyun Lee

NICKNAMES: Jae

AGE: 27 | August 12th, 1995

GENDER & PRONOUNS: Cis Man, He/Him

FACE CLAIM: Cha Eun-woo

HEIGHT: 6’1

EYE COLOR: Dark Brown

HAIR COLOR: Black (usually)

OCCUPATION: Owner & Vet at The Pet Doctor

BIRTHPLACE: Hidehill, TN

NEIGHBORHOOD: Hove Lake

BACKGROUND

Born in Hidehill to Lee Jung-hoon and Chae-won, Jae was born the eldest son of his family, with one little sister. The couple initially struggled with infertility after getting married, causing an early rift in the twos marriage that Jae would grow up to witness himself.

His parents viewed him as their golden child, the glue that held a broken marriage together. Growing up, he had an immense amount of pressure placed on him to be the best. He also tended to have to deal with his parents fighting in front of him more often than his sister ever did, Jae constantly put in the middle as a child.

As a result of this, Jae grew up with the notion that being in a relationship didn’t amount to being happy. And even as he'd grow older, his subconscious would remind him of it, steering him away from the idea of romance with the exception of a few relationships when he was younger.

Aside from his views on love however, he had always been a kind-hearted and caring person, more than happy to go the extra mile for those he cared about.

He also grew up to be incredibly ambitious. Class president and valedictorian of his high school class, valuing his education greatly. Had his parents had the money, Jae would've committed to going to his dream school, Harvard on early admission. Instead though, he'd stay somewhat close to home and attend Duke University on a scholarship in North Carolina.

It was Jae’s mother who had opened the Pet Doctor. She'd had a love for animals her entire life, and Jae was the same as his mother, volunteering at the local pet shelter when he wasn't busy with school. He also had been the one to help his mother out when she’d opened the clinic, his own love of animals growing enough to make him decide to pursue becoming a veterinarian.

What he hadn't expected, was to return from vet school and be handed the keys to one of mothers pride and joy. Turns out, in Jae’s time away at college, his parent’s relationship worsened, ending in a messy divorce that would make Chae-won move for her own mental health. It was natural for her to leave her business to her eldest son, who was her first pride and joy really.

Becoming a business owner wasn’t exactly his plan. Jae had always been extremely smart and easy to pick up new things, but taking over an entire business with employees fresh out of school would prove to be the first challenge he incurred in life. 

Upon first glance, he probably comes across as the kind of guy who would be a great boyfriend. Kind, caring, humble. The kind of guy you'd want to introduce to your parents. The only problem was, most girls never really make it that far. Jae’s the type for one night stands, meaningless flings. He tends to cut it off if he can tell any feelings are arising on either part. He’s found himself giving the whole “I think we’d be better as friends” spiel, not wanting to actually hurt anyone.

HEADCANONS

95% of the people in his life call him jae. the only one’s who really ever use his full name are his family.

has gotten a few tattoos done, all discreet and hidden, some meaningful but most done out of impulse

struggles with insomnia, has been since high school. he’s fairly good at managing it and not making it a big deal, even when jae only gets two hours of sleep a night

definitely has the reputation of being a really nice guy, despite that probably not always being true. 

fluent in korean, english, french, and japanese.

has three cats named jung, mina, and lily, all of which are rescues.

works out pretty much every day. usually in the middle of the night since it’s most convenient for him. jae did soccer and swimming in high school so he generally likes to stay active.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

ex-girlfriend (max two)

best friends

flings/hookups

close friends 

childhood friends

#jae ( about ) #hidehillintro

[bugznews]

Dear Journal, Friday, April 19, 2024

I am officially having a sneeze attack. I think that it is my allergies going haywire again. It is so early in springtime that you would think that I wouldn't be struggling with them this soon. It is going to be a rough season for me. I mean I know that I have them year around but this is plain out crazy.

I did something cool. I got Hulu added to my Disney+ application. Now I can watch even more shows. Plus, my mom can watch the shows that I don't like. It is a win-win situation. They even have the Pikachu movie that I never got to see.

I know that it is still important for me to do this blog. Because I want to be there for all of you. No matter how bad my back hurts. Even though I am at the end of my rope with it. But there is nothing that I can do until I see my physical therapist.

I am not sure what I am going to do today. It is too cold for a bath. My mom can't drive anywhere because she just came off working for five days. So we can't go anywhere. That means I will be in the land of boredom for the rest of the day. This never is a good place for me to be with my mental health.

I did do something to help keep me healthy. I charged up my smart watch and started tracking everything again. It did not work on my old phone but now it is working just fine. But my old phone was really old. So that might have been part of the problem. Plus, it can tell me when I have messages. That is nice so I don't have to look at my phone a zillion times a day.

I think today it is important for me to get my meditation done and just rest. My back is acting up and I can't move as much as I would like to. I would love to be able to clean up the house right about now. I will admit that it is a mess at the moment. But I know at the same time my health is more important than a messy house. I am what is important not whether my house is up to snuff. I understand all of those individuals who struggle to do simple tasks during the day.

Whether it is because of physical or mental challenges. For me, it is a little bit of both. I also understand what feels like when you succeed in something. Just getting this blog done makes me feel like I accomplish something each day. Sorry, my acid reflux is going off. That is what I get for drinking coffee. But it was so cold this morning that I had no choice.

I am also trying to focus more on my mental health. Mainly by doing mediation on Serenity. I don't know what I would do without it. But I am sure if you need to you could write your mediation if you wanted to.

After this, I am just going to play video games along with meditation in the background. This is how I do mediation because I can't keep my hands still any other way. I have severe ADHD that gets in the way. I always have to be doing something with my hands. I can't even sit still during church. Instead, I take my tablet to play on.

I wish you could see my cat she is lying on my mom's lap. It is probably the cutest thing ever. I am just going to leave those two alone. Besides I have this blog to finish for the day. I believe that the lord gives us struggles that help us become more like him. He doesn't do this because he is mean but because he loves us. So I know that my struggle with my back won't last forever.

But for right now there is a lesson that I need to learn to make me more like him. I am just a diamond in the rough and he is slowly polishing off all the dirt. He is doing the same thing with you. In the future, you will not even recognize yourself. And if you believe in a high power the same thing happens.

I just wanted to share some thoughts with you. This helps me with the many hours of being stuck in the recliner. Sorry, the landlord was knocking on the front door. So I had to get the laptop off of my legs. Get out of the recliner. Then stand up. Talk about a lot of work. For just one slip of paper. I could have so lived without having to get up.

The worst part is that I pulled the muscle in my back once again. My mom is exploring a new Hulu application. She is having so much fun. I just want to laugh out loud at what she is doing. I am sorry that I didn't really tie this to mental health. But I felt the need to share this part of my life with all of you. I wanted you to know that I am just like you.

Now if no one else interrupts me everything will get done. Then I can just rest the rest of the day. I just want to feel up the whole page on my computer first. I don't like leaving things undone. That is just not my style at all. I work hard on anything that I put my mind to doing.

Even if everyone stops doing it. Now my mom is distracting me. Oh god everyone hid she found the show called MASH. Now I won't see her the rest of the day. Peace and quiet is finally here. Now maybe I can actually concentrate on my blog and video games. Did I mention that Hulu has no commercials? Maybe she will surface in time for dinner. I am currently watching my favorite Law and Order show. I like the one with Jack McCoy. He is awesome. Now I am a little worried about my mom. She has definitely found a new obsession. Oh dear, what have I done? I hope you all find something that helps you relax. I would love to hear from you. Just please leave a comment on my blog. Have a great day.

#mental health awareness

[apinchofrkmh]

Housemates

During my university days, I remember praying continuously for a good roommate that I don’t have to struggle living with. But in the end, I didn’t even stay in the hostel. Haha

This is time, living in a shared house with three bedroom, it requires me to find housemates every time someone leaves. And it’s tedious. So tedious.

So, last year, 2023, I moved into The Fortress of Female Power. Yeah, what a name right? Someone worked in google and manage to name the place it is today.

I enjoyed living with Ady but he left to Abu Dhabi. He found a housemate via social media. Her name is Ayesha and I didn’t feel good vibes having her. However, Ady needed to find a housemate to get back his deposit and we welcomed Ayesha.

Ayesha is from Cape Town, South Africa. She came here to do her English test and became a kindergarten teacher.

A few months later, my other housemate left and Ayesha invite her friend to stay with her. She’s Lizzie and she’s from America.

I didn’t come to agreement for Lizzie to stay as I didn’t get a chance to meet her first. I left to Malaysia for 8 weeks when she came and join us in August 2023.

Having Lizzie was a blessing. But having Ayesha isn’t. Ayesha started to smoke in the room which affects the air quality. She started to be financially crippled that she suggest to stop cleaning services and we decided to do our cleaning. However, her cleaning isn’t the same level as Lizzie and myself.

Almost every month, she struggle to pay up utility bills. And when I ask for it, she seems angry at me. Or her tone change when she speaks to me.

Last year, around Sept 2023, she told me she need to go back to South Africa to get her passport renewed as there is no embassy in Cambodia and the nearest is Thailand. Which will be a big gamble for her to be in Thailand while waiting for her passport to be completed. She left to Africa in November and only came back in late December.

When she came back to Cambodia, she lost her job as a kindergarten teacher. From her perspective, she said she took leave for too long and the school decided to terminate her. She started to ask if she could borrow $80 from me and I gave an excuse that I’m studying and needed funds for myself too. She replied me unhappily.

So she quickly find another school in order to survive. She was glad to find one but was only able to start 4 weeks later. At the mean time, they told her to work part time over the weekend only. As weeks gone by, she got a call from the school that got the offer, stating that they didn’t want her anymore. The school did a background check on her with her previous school and thought that she won’t be a good fit for her in the school.

She got so angry and came ranting at me. Of course, I’ll do the same too. But I came to think, she must have done something ain’t good that they reconsider her. Then thoughts just came flooding in my head. How did she manage to pay the house rent?

So I went to the landlady to ask if she’s actually paying and she said Ayesha hasn’t been paying for 4 months since November to January. I was also told that she plead and cried in from of her to allow her to stay for another month. And the landlady was kind enough to allow her to stay until the end of February. She also requested Ayesha to pay at least a month of rental but she couldn’t afford.

It was the 29th February 2024. The year with the longest February in 4 years. Haha. Landlady was expecting her to leave on this day. But Ayesha said 1st March. Landlady wasn’t happy as she kept delaying.

On 1st March, in the afternoon, the landlady came into the house and thinking if she could do some cleaning. She was is utter shock to find out how messy Ayesha’s room was. I came back home and found landlady in our unit. She open Ayesha’s room and ask me to take a look. I was in utter shock too! Clothes everywhere on the floor, plates and bowls unwashed with food on it, wine bottles everywhere!!!

Anyway, I knew she was leaving on 1st March and I was thinking maybe it’s a good thing to leave the house so I don’t bump into her. Lo and behold, I literally saw her downstairs waiting for her tuktuk! I was like, DANG!!! What should I say?! Wished her well of course!

The next day, the first thing I did was to wash all the kitchen utensils that she’s been using! I just got to kill all the bacteria!

It was a Saturday, I had to do my private teaching in the morning. Again, I bump into Ayesha downstairs again! This time with Lizzie! I could never understand what she was saying because of her accent. She was telling me something and I’m not quite sure what it was and all I said was, “Yeah, you should pay back Lizzie the utility bills” and guess what? She said, “That’s one thing about you Rachel. You and your attitude. Your character! That’s just you!”

Wow. What happen there?

What the hell? I was being accuse with my attitude? Maybe you should look at the mirror first, girl. Landlady has the rights to come into your room when you don’t pay your rents.

I sat on the tuktuk, reflecting what she said to me. I can’t think of what I did to her apart from telling her please don’t smoke in the room. Haha.

So, when the landlady came in wanted to clean the house, feeling pissed after seeing Ayesha’s room, she expressed herself about Lizzie. She said that Lizzie didn’t pay for her first month rental. I was shocked cause I think there’s a misunderstanding there. Lizzie is like me. She doesn’t like owing people and making sure that she clears her bill as soon as possible.

I had a talk with Lizzie. There were a few matters I had to speak to her. The first was the misunderstanding about rental payment. She said she paid the deposit to the previous tenant and to Ayesha $200 for the first rental and cleaning when it’s suppose to be only $193. Dang. After 8 months, we found out that Ayesha didn’t pass the money to the landlady. Sigh.

The second thing I had to speak to Lizzie was her boyfriend. For the past two weeks, her boyfriend was staying with her in our house. I don’t feel comfortable and I didn’t sign up for a plus one. I know I have to tell her no matter what. And I did. She said the previous tenant brought hers. Why not mine? Yeah, previous tenant’s boyfriend only came on the weekend. But yours, everyday!!! I told her that I hope she understands it isn’t fair for me. And her boyfriend came out and scolded me. Like what? You’re a nobody in the house and you’re acting like you are the boss of the house. Bloody Khmer boy.

After confrontation that night, I didn’t see that bloody boy anymore. It was a peaceful Sunday. But a shocking Monday morning.

“Hey, I broke up with my boyfriend”

Ops. Sorry that you did. But I’m glad that you did. Hahahahaa

She told me the boy was so controlling. Telling her what she can wear, who she can talk to, where she can go. Dude, Lizzie is American. She’s born to be independent no matter you like it or not. Stupid boy.

From then on, I felt my relationship with Lizzie got better and we had a meal together.

It’s a very difficult situation wanting to stay in Fortress of Female Power if you don’t have friends to replace someone who is leaving.

Lesson learned. If you don’t feel a good vibe with a person, don’t accept. Follow your instinct!

#housemate #financially crippled #goodbye African #hello French #Phnom Penh #Cambodia