#i put all the shit in there that the recipe told me to

[scribblewrites]

Bakugou with a Chronically Ill Partner Headcanons

Katsuki Bakugou x Gn!reader

This is fully self indulgent, chronic illness/autoimmune diseases are kicking my ass 😔

I tried to keep it vague so multiple conditions can be applied, but I only have experience with my type of chronic illness. Pls lemme know if it can be improved to include more

hope y’all enjoy! ♥

— He goes with you to doctor’s appointments and lab testing. Especially if you struggle with a fear of doctors. He will make sure the doctors listen to you and don’t dismiss your symptoms.

— If you deal with appetite issues, nausea, etc., he keeps a list of bland safe foods. During flare ups he loves to cook for you and will make sure you don’t go to long between meals. Food is his love language and he will make sure you’re eating right.

— He bought you a heatable stuffed animal for your chronic pain. He will heat up your stuffed animal for you, though he will often use his quirk as a heating pad as well. 

— When you told him about your chronic illness/autoimmune disease he immediately went and researched it. Of course he’d never admit it but this man did his homework. He spent hours on medical websites, forums, and blogs finding the best ways to support you. 

— Back to the food thing, he keeps track of all of your trigger foods. Since finding out any of your allergies he likes to come up with new recipes around them. He sees it as a challenge if you say foods without your trigger taste gross.

— If your still struggling to get diagnosed and feel like maybe your just crazy me currently, he’s there constantly reassuring you. If any one makes you feel like you’re complaining too much or that your issues are all in your head he is on their ass. He does not put up with people making you feel like shit.

— He keeps track of your prescriptions and when you need refills. You forgot to pick up your medication and now you’re out? He already picked it up on his way home from patrol. He’s even got reminders set on his phone for when you need to take your meds. When they go off he’s by your side with water and food if they can’t be taken on an empty stomach. 

— If you take injections he will help administer it. He will calm you down and distract you if you’re afraid of needles, or administer it for you if you’re unable. 

❀ ——————————————————— ❀

Shout out to my other chronically ill babes! hope y'all enjoyed these silly hc’s

#bakugou katsuki #mha bakugou #mha headcanons #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki x reader #chronic illness #autoimmine disease #bakugou x reader headcanons #bakugo x reader

[shveris]

collage au with toji, sukuna and satoru living together and it’s surprisingly clean and well kept.

mention of emotional & physical abuse from family members and trauma

toji is the most messy out of the three but sukuna hates dirt so when he finds it he cleans it. satoru is a perfectionist who grew up in a tidy mansion so he always has the need and urge to keep his new environment just as clean — he feels very uncomfortable and restless otherwise.

they fuck around once in a while (yes, literal fucking) but it’s mainly because none of them have the actual mental to have proper relationships and despite satoru’s very extroverted behaviour, he actually hates touching people. he thinks they’re dirty, unsanitary, because he doesn’t know how they live and what their hands and clothes have been touching.

sukuna is clean though, he knows because he regularly buys those very expensive bodywashes and puts all their underwear into another cycle just after the first one is done.

toji is clean since he is kinda trained to adapt to his environment. he eventually even stops punching sukuna when he tries to put lotion on his very dry face after a scorching hot shower and he starts washing his hands when he comes home.

they don’t talk about how all of them have sex with each other at least twice a week — trice, if there’s exam stress — and usually the apartment is filled with bickering.

“six, you told me you’d send me that fucking report an hour ago.” satoru just stares at toji in his doorway and clicks his tongue because, yes, he completely forgot.

“have some fucking manners, dude”, he snaps back but sends him the report. they got thrown into this group project for three months with this emo named choso and a guy named ino, not that any of them gave a fuck. they were just laughing at sukuna because he was stuck with four women staring down at him.

there’re also regular outbursts of sukuna throwing items around — at satoru and toji as well — because he feels threatened. by what? they don’t know. they don’t ask. they just go with it and make a game out of it.

“if one of you hits my face i will actually chop your dicks off” is usually what satoru enters the living room with but when the tv remote slams into his jaw ten minutes later, he can’t help but laugh menacingly and throws himself onto the culprit elbow first.

their evenings are filled with study sessions (sukuna and satoru take their academics very serious and toji is just sitting there because he enjoys watching their facial expressions contort into frustrated confusion), playing video games, sex, uno that almost always ends up with sukuna and toji trying to kill each other, bad horror movies that make sukuna hungry, and some times they’re actually peacefully talking with each other until satoru falls asleep.

almost everyone on campus thinks they are dating and neither of them have an issue with that rumor (“it keeps the weird chicks away” sukuna had said and toji rolled his eyes). they don’t even act like couples, more like competitive boxers with too much testosterone (shoko’s words).

even with sukuna’s constant berates, insults and slurs, he loves cooking and always looks for a chance to brag about it to satoru.

“i bet your private chefs at home ain’t shit in comparison to me” or “the michelin chefs your parents are friends with can only wish to be at my level” or “this is my first time cooking this recipe and i fucking rocked it”

toji doesn’t mind at all, he loves all kinds of food, he’s the opposite of picky. whenever there’s something on satoru’s plate that he doesn’t like, he gives it to toji who will happily eat it for him.

sukuna even makes an effort to learn the recipes to his roommate’s favourite foods, perfects them in a few weeks. making mochi was probably way too much effort but he feels very proud whenever satoru brightens up upon eating the sweet treats. he’s glad toji is on the easier side of all this, the man loves chinese food a lot; dumplings, egg drop soup, lamb skewers and some simple noodle dishes.

toji doesn’t look like it but he enjoys the other two men’s company a lot. they never judge him for who he is, they never expect him to be a certain way, and not once did they ask why on some nights he comes home covered in blood. they just tell him to clean up properly and throw his clothes into the washer for three circles. they don’t ask him why he has that scar on his lips or nag him about that massive one that wraps around the left side of his body.

satoru is curious, his eyes speak volumes, but he never says nothing about it and just traces the tissue with his fingertips after sex. sukuna doesn’t even seem to acknowledge it at all, ignores it almost, but he always tells him to apply more lotion to it after scorching showers together.

grocery runs with them are always a complete mess; satoru only has eyes for sweets, toji grabs the next best instant ramen from the shelves, sukuna is constantly scolding them for not eating more healthy, says both of them would have vitamin deficiency if it weren’t for him.

he absolutely hates going out with them to the store but it’s necessary in a way. it’s a way of bonding, they get to buy everything they need once a week and then don’t have to go there for another seven days, and it makes cooking plans easier — and satoru is there to pay because he’s rich and the other two ain’t.

they also always end up buying a few packs of condoms and lube, much to the cashier’s horrors upon reading “extra large” and “strawberry flavoured”

sukuna and toji are rough, absolutely and utterly wild. satoru often calls sukuna an animal with no other instincts than to bite and breed and tear him inside out whereas toji just always knows how and when to abuse his prostate in the weirdest positions — satoru now has to stretch everyday to keep his limbs flexible.

when toji and sukuna fuck, the bedroom turns into a warzone. there’s bite and scratch marks everywhere on their bodies and when sukuna finally gives in and bottoms, neither of them actually make an effort to stretch him. never goes well. sukuna actually cries but he loves pain so it’s okay because satoru gives toji a really big scolding after and then both of them try to somewhat take care of him.

which also never goes well because all three of them never had good experiences with physical touch, nor do they know how to take care of someone else or themselves.

toji was barely holding himself together after graduation high school, having started some heavy drugs when he was sixteen and he never really grew out of it for years because of his fucked up family or his even more fucked up friends.

satoru was homeschooled, had no friends, didn’t know anyone his age — he had no concept of social life, of interpersonal relationships, pop culture. his face never showed any emotions because he just didn’t feel nothing, he felt hollow. nothing in his life brought him joy. his own mother barely paid any attention to him and when she did, there was nothing but hatred in her words.

sukuna grew up with a mother that had fun torturing him, may it be emotionally or physically. when he was younger, still an only child and his father too busy with work, she’s used him to press out her cigarettes, told him to stay still and then watched his face with great interest. there��s a long list of things that he had to endure and he hates remembering it.

they don’t know how they found each other.

i will deffo write more for this au bc i miss toji and satoru terribly

#shveris’ blue spring #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #gojo satoru #ryomen sukuna #tojikuna #toji fushiguro #toji zenin

[touyanii]

i hate baking because even when you follow the recipe it can just not work out

#baking #bake #made a carrot cake #saw it on tiktik with a full recipe #.. #it's just a wet spongy oversized square pancake #i put all the shit in there that the recipe told me to #i mixed the shit how i told me to #it said 35 to 45 minutes #i had it 40min in the oven. then switched it off and left it in there for another 10 #why the fuck isn't it as fluffy and soft as in the tiktok 🥲🥲🥲 #i hate baking 😭

[yuoic]

.

#fucking shit #tried this new recipe for hard-boiled eggs #boiled many eggs at once and now i'm stuck with a lot of chalky-egg-yolk eggs #y_y it'll be a tough week #i hate lab for a fucking reason #now i'm gonna have to slightly modify each step of the process until i find one that always gives me the expected results #i fucking hate cooking #and lab #i really wish an equivalent of cat food but for humans existed #like just buy a 15 kg bag of the thing and scoop a fistful three times a day #that's it #all the nutrients in a single fucking serving #no gas consumption #no dirty dishes to wash later #no waiting until it's done cooking/baking and do stuff at the right time or it's ruined #either undercooked or burned #no fridge even (except for seltzers or ice-cream) #but n0o0 we need a 'balanced nutritional plan than includes ALL types of vegetables and vitamins and proteins' or whatever the fuck #just put everything in a blender then dry and sell me the fucking thing #a nutritionist told me that vitamin supplements don't work UNLESS you ingest them ALONG with healthy fucking food #like celery and what not #then what's the fucking point?!?? #that's exactly why I eat the same thing every damn day: 200 g meat (any) and plate stuffed with vegetables #fucking open the package containing the meat #throw it in a pan until fully cooked #in the meantime wash and disinfect vegetables #chew on all that when it's done #wash ONE spatula #ONE pan #ONE knife (for cutting the veggies)

[bettsfic]

today is my birthday! i’m 33 today and i have done an ungodly amount of stupid shit in my life that honestly probably should have gotten me killed. so here are 33 hard-won things i’ve learned that i wish someone had told me sooner.

whenever you buy an object, you are going to own that object for your entire life unless you make the conscious decision to throw it away or give it a new home. maybe other people don’t struggle with this as much as i do, but i’ve grown to become a little exhausted by finding a thing and realizing i don’t want it anymore, but i don’t have the energy or motivation to do anything with it. signed, a woman with a packed 10x10 storage unit who is now extremely hesitant to buy new things.

food, and by that i mean good food (and by that i don’t necessarily mean healthy food, but food of good quality that you love), is necessary to live, and buying it, preparing it, and eating it is not a chore. the sooner you accept this and make food a priority in your life, the healthier you’ll be. 

speaking of food, not everything you buy should be the cheapest version of it. personally i’ve found it’s always worth it to splurge on good olive oil, butter, and canned tomatoes. for years i thought i was an awful cook because i was cooking with cheap, disgusting olive oil that made my food taste like shit.

speaking of food part 2, i can’t BELIEVE how long this took me to figure out, but mise en place is the real real. get your shit out and organized and prepped *before* you start cooking, even if it makes things take longer. and yes, it is always worth it to do the dishes as you go, which pisses me off.

when i was teaching myself how to cook and feeling daunted about it, the best advice i ever got was to aim to learn 15 recipes and then put them in rotation.

this is the most horrific and awful truth i have forced myself to accept: there may come a day you can no longer digest your favorite foods, and you will either have to stop eating them, or remain very close to a toilet. i’m sorry.

other people are always going to misperceive you and misunderstand you, sometimes willfully. other people’s opinions of you don’t actually have anything to do with you. they’re not your business, and you don’t have to worry about it or change yourself.

when innocuous or neutral things make you irrationally angry or upset, step back, realize you’re having a big reaction, and then when you’re ready, pay very close attention to the thing that upset you, because you’re about to learn something important about yourself.

a pill sorter can save your life. i don’t know how i managed my meds without one.

sometimes college is about learning stuff, and not about becoming something.

no matter how many perfectionist tendencies you have, it’s worth it to remind yourself that no matter how much of a mess you actually are, you deserve to be loved.

if you’re always forgetting to do important but tedious things, set an alarm and set aside one hour of each week, not to do the important tedious things, but to assess what needs to be done, and *schedule* the important tedious things for the following week. this literally changed my life.

during that hour, make a meal plan too. the point of doing this is condense the time in which you’re making decisions (what to do, what to eat, etc) so you don’t have to burden yourself with them throughout the week. decision fatigue is real. any way you can alleviate that is a good thing.

learn the difference between aggressive, passive, passive-aggressive, and assertive behavior. recognize when you’re being one of the first three, re-assess and aim for being assertive, even if it’s hard.

you can tell you’ve processed trauma, not when the traumatic thing stops upsetting you to think about, but when the traumatic thing takes up the same size in your brain as all your other memories.

if you’re one of those people who never seems to finish projects or follow through with things, there’s a chance you may just grow out of it naturally. until then, follow your interests and don’t feel bad about putting down a hobby to pick up another.

if you love stickers but have sticker anxiety, buy vinyl stickers. you can re-stick them.

there are only a few careers i can think of that you have to commit to early in life because getting the undergraduate credentials is a pain in the ass (teachers, doctors, and engineers, from my research). nearly everything else you can switch to later, which takes a LOT of pressure off having to figure out what you want to do with your life.

people say there’s no money in becoming an artist, writer, musician, etc. actually there’s a ton of money in all of those things, it’s just in the stuff other people want you to make and never what you want to make. it’s still worth it to develop the creative skill and not force yourself into business school because it’s more “practical” or whatever. 

sleep when you’re tired. SLEEP WHEN YOU’RE TIRED. don’t beat yourself up about it, don’t tell yourself you shouldn’t be tired or that you’ve already slept too much, just take a fucking nap. you would never say “hm i’ve already had enough water today, therefore i should not be thirsty” so don’t treat sleep the same way.

when you build a piece of furniture from target or ikea or whatever, the first thing you should do is count all the little screws and things to make sure everything’s there that should be. it sucks to get halfway into putting something together only to find there’s a piece missing and you have to go buy it.

learn to travel by yourself, go out to eat by yourself, see a movie by yourself. in my early 20s i was scared to do these things, but i do them so often now i don’t even think about it. it’s the most fulfilling skill i’ve ever learned.

adding to the above, if you’re a people-pleaser, being alone is especially important, because you’ve probably developed the habit of making the people you’re with more comfortable and happy than yourself, and you’re missing a lot of the beautiful and interesting things around you. when you’re by yourself, you can focus on what *you* want without guilt. 

sometimes you’ll want to break things off with a friend for reasons that are no one’s fault, and you don’t want it to be volatile or make a big thing of it, in which case the goal is to simply fade out of their life. it is okay to let people go.

shame is useless. get rid of it.

no matter how much of yourself you put into your art (or writing, or music, or whatever), when people criticize it, they are not criticizing you. they are having a reaction colored by their own tastes and perspectives. their opinion of your work has nothing to do with you. you don’t have to take everyone’s feedback. in fact you don’t have to take anyone’s feedback. the other side to this coin unfortunately is that compliments don’t have anything to do with you either. it’s good to accept this because it means you’ll stop seeking validation from other people and won’t let anyone else’s perspectives impact your work. anything nice anyone says about your work is merely a bonus to an already good thing.

if you’re an artist of any kind, take one day a year to look up opportunities like grants, funding, residencies, workshops, whatever. put the due dates of all of them on a calendar for the year following and get into the habit of applying for stuff. getting rejected sucks, application fees suck, but in all the years i’ve been doing this, it has always, always been worth it. these things give you a chance not only to help fund and support what you’re passionate about, but they force you to take your own work seriously, and that is something that’s absolutely necessary in order to be successful.

you must become your own greatest advocate. in all respects--in health, in love, in happiness, in freedom, you must. no one will ever fight as hard for you as you will. this in turn will give you the strength and motivation to help others fight for themselves too. the only way the world will ever get better is if every person on this planet learns to see themselves as equals to everyone around them.

brag about yourself as often as you can. for one, people develop their perceptions of you based on how you treat yourself and speak about yourself. but for two, it’s the fastest way to figure out which people to keep in your life, because they’re the ones who are going “oh hell yeah, you’re awesome.” 

be the person other people want to brag to.

at some point in your life, someone is going to hurt you, and it’s going to be willful and intentional. it is not worth it to waste brain space figuring out why they did it or why you think you deserved it. all you have to do is let yourself feel that pain, acknowledge it, and try to move on.

no matter how bad off you think you are, recovery is possible. the first and hardest step is to learn you’re worth the time and effort it takes to recover from the awful things that have happened to you.

developing an expertise does not mean you’re getting objectively better at something. becoming an expert is only the process of seeing your mistakes and having the patience to sit in the discomfort of not knowing how to fix them.    

#writing advice

[bukuoshin]

AGHGHAGAGA

I'm almost finished making cookies, yayyyyy!

\(^〰^\)

#rae rants #my back hurts from having to lean down to put the dough on the pan;;; #i just have to ice about 1/4 of the sugar cookies and i'll be done... but idw do it rn cuz my back is killing me. #i have to figure out where to put the peanut butter cookies (currently cooling) bc Space... #i have never had him misbehave this bad. he took a frosted cookie (that was out cuz it was drying) and threw it on the floor #and then ate all its legs off. theres still frosting on the tile... #it was a reindeer i forgot to mention that and i only had 5 of those turn out correctly so i was even madder lol #i do think i have a problem of coating shit too much. like a recipe will be like 'make sure its completely coated' so i do but... #my end result always looks so so so different than how its supposed to. and this goes for both my snickerdoodles and how much sugar i #put on the pb cookies. oops. my bad. #also... relatedly. i slipped on one of Kami's toys yesterday and the only reason i didnt get hurt was cuz my right elbow hit this #futon thing i use as a chair. before the rest of my body hit the floor. so. my arm kinda hurts from the jolt. #AND i've been having real bad carpal tunnel the last week. im a mess man... #and my sister literally just told me LAST NIGHT that she'll have her kids for xmas eve so i have to get everything done like. now. #and i have to hang up my bras to dry so i can shower and buy dog food and icing and kitchenware for my sis and presents for my niece #and i have to pick out an outfit for eve now and so on... i'm so busy;;;;;; #AND. I ALMOST FORGOT. I HAVENT SMOKED IN 2 DAYS CUZ ITS SO COLD OUT THAT I HAVE TO WEAR 6 LAYERS TO GO OUTSIDE FOR MORE THAN 2 MINS. #im gonna layer up in a minute here but. i need some time for my back to like. stop hurting.

[strang3lov3]

Cinnabon

Summary: (mall rats 7, final part!) Joel ruins a special moment, leading to another stupid argument, leading to him fucking the daylights out of you on his couch. Lovingly.

Tags: AU where yeast is not dead and we can all bake and be happy. Cordyceps is no longer in the flour/sugar either (work with me) Cinnabons, 69, dirty talk, unprotected Piv, creampie because it’s me, strang3lov3. soft dom joel because again, it’s me, strang3lov3. Strange highs and strange lows, that’s how my love goes. You get it.

A/N: As always, thank you @papipascalispunk for editing ❤️ you’ve helped me so much on this series and you have no clue how thankful I am for that. Definitely abusing your talents for the next shit I wanna write! And thank you to everyone who’s read and reblogged, commented, all of that good stuff. This was a blast to write!!!

This may not be the absolute end of these two, so you might get an update on them here and there, most likely in the form of yet another lovers quarrel. But I have so much stuff planned and I hope you continue to keep up with me ❤️ excited for the new year and to share what else i've been writing with all of you 🩷

It’s early in the morning in late December when you’re walking up to Joel’s porch, holding a basket full of ingredients and a dusty copy of Betty Crocker’s Cookbook. You knock on the door, no answer. With Joel’s poor hearing, sometimes it’s better to knock on his back door. He seems to hear it better, closer to his bedroom and all that. You make your way to his back door, where you find Ellie quietly opening the window next to the door, no doubt sneaking back from a friend’s house. You startle each other, “Ellie, hi,” you say. You wrinkle your nose, she smells like weed. You can’t help but smirk.

“Oh,” she says, “Hi. I’m not– I’m just–”

“I won’t tell Joel,” you smile. Ellie’s staring at your basket of goodies, where one of your lacy Victoria’s Secret thongs sits on top of a blue Cinnabon apron. “I’m just…baking. For Joel. Are you gonna be home today?”

It’s Ellie’s turn to smirk at you, as she opens the window the rest of the way and lifts herself inside the house. You hear her heavy footsteps before she unlocks and opens the door for you. “I can disappear,” she replies, “I require payment, though.” 

“I’ll leave you a plate outside your door.”

“Deal.” 

Ellie goes to her room probably to change clothes, and you go toward Joel’s kitchen. “I want two of whatever you’re making,” Ellie calls out before slamming the back door again, probably going back to her friend’s house. That girl certainly knows how to negotiate. You can’t help but love her for it.

Joel usually wakes up early, but he’s not on his recliner where you expect him to be. Must be in bed. You smile to yourself, picturing Joel coming downstairs in his pajamas, hair messy and sighing in pleasure at the sweet aroma of butter and cinnamon. 

You’re making Cinnabons this morning. Well, cinnamon rolls, as Betty Crocker puts it. When you and Joel were in the Barnes and Noble at the mall picking up books for Jackson’s library, you had stumbled across Betty Crocker’s Cookbook. Flipping through the pages, you found a recipe for cinnamon rolls and thought back to that first time in the mall with Joel, where he explained what a Cinnabon was, and then lied about his sweet tooth. 

There were loads of recipes, many interesting pictures too. You brought the book to Joel and pointed at a picture of some odd, translucent dome-shaped food item. He told you it was called Jell-O, and that no one misses it. You wanted to take the cookbook back with you, but there wasn’t room in the duffel bag. And you couldn’t bear to rip out a single page for one recipe. That would just be cruel.

At the end of the day, you went back to Tommy’s office with Joel. Joel usually walks you home, but he didn’t that day. Said he was running late for game night with Ellie, so he took off quickly. Tommy told you he’d walk you home, though.

As you and Tommy went through some of the books, he heard you sigh disappointedly, “What’s gotcha down, hon?”

“There was this book I wanted, but we didn’t have room.” 

“What book?”

“Cookbook,” you replied, “I wanted to make a recipe for Joel.” 

“Ah,” Tommy murmured, flipping through the pages of an old picture book, “Which recipe?”

“Cinnamon rolls.”

“Oh man,” Tommy groaned. He checked his watch, then looked at you with a light in his eyes. 

“I’ll take you back there right now to get that book.” 

“You’d do that?”, you asked.

“For you, of course. But I got my motives. Ya gotta hook me up with some of those rolls.”

There are few things that make you feel as loved and appreciated as when Tommy’s eating your food, showering you in the sweetest compliments and praises. No problem, you’d gladly share your baking with him. So Tommy took you back to the mall. You led him to the bookstore, picked up your book and went on your merry way. Tommy still hadn’t gotten to check the mall out for himself, though. So he wandered through the same areas you did, through the food court you and Joel picked through all that time ago. At the Cinnabon stand, he tossed you a blue apron with the word ‘Cinnabon’ embroidered at the chest. “Bet ya could make Joel turn bright red with this.”

You picked up what he was putting down immediately. And, thinking about it, you had a lacy thong that would match the apron perfectly. You remembered the blush on Joel’s cheeks as you tried on lingerie at Victoria’s Secret, how he mumbled something about lingerie being a waste of time before fucking you in the dressing room, still wearing your pretty pink chiffon babydoll. You wondered if faced with a big, gooey cinnamon roll sitting in front of him, and you in nothing but an apron and a thong, he’d still lie about that sweet tooth of his and his disdain for lingerie. Cause for an experiment. 

–

In Joel’s kitchen, you prepare the recipe. You prepped the dough last night, giving it plenty of time to rise. All you have to do this morning is prepare the cinnamon-sugar mixture and the icing. Oh, and put on that apron and thong. Not too hard. 

Once the rolls are assembled in the pan, you put them in Joel’s oven and change into your little outfit, feeling a little breeze on your bare ass. Good thing Ellie’s gone. As you’re waiting for the rolls to bake, you lean over Joel’s kitchen table and flip through the pages of your cookbook. The Jell-O still has you perplexed. 

Some time goes by. You’re reading about the Jell-O, how Betty Crocker said that it was great for parties and baby showers and other things like that. The slam of the glass door behind you startles you. You whip around, and there’s Joel with bright red cheeks, looking shocked and horrified. Through the glass door, you see Tommy in Joel’s yard. He waves at you, smiling. You wave back.

“Jesus Christ,” Joel grumbles, quickly pulling the blinds over the glass door to protect your modesty, “You gonna explain why you’re bare assed in my kitchen?”

“I thought you were sleeping,” you reply.

“That doesn’t answer my question,” he grumbles, as the egg timer you set prior goes off with a ding. You open the oven and pull out the cinnamon rolls with a pair of potholders, giving Joel a perfect view of your entire ass. “Oh my god,” he groans. When you turn around, he’s pinching the bridge of his nose and shaking his head, always so dramatic. You reach for the Pyrex measuring bowl full of icing you prepared and begin drizzling it over the warm cinnamon rolls. “You drive me fuckin’ crazy. You’re somethin’ else, you know that? I never know what–”, Joel stops speaking, and you look back at him once more. He’s intrigued, eyes wide. The pastry has pulled his attention away from your nearly-bare body. “Those uh– those cinnamon rolls?”

“Cinnabons,” you correct him, pointing to the embroidered logo on your chest, “But yeah– cinnamon rolls.”

“Right,” he murmurs, stepping closer to you. He reaches into one of his drawers for a fork and pushes you out of the way. 

“Joel,” you complain as he steals a bite of the cinnamon rolls, right out of the pan. He blows on it first, careful not to burn his tongue. When he tastes the pastry, his eyes flutter shut. He moans softly. “You said once that you missed Cinnabons,” you explain, speaking softly. Joel reaches for another bite, right out of the pan.

“Mhm,” he mumbles, mouth full of dessert.

“What’s the verdict?”

“Cinnabon’s better,” he answers plainly. 

Your face drops. “What?”

“Yeah this–”, he takes another bite, “S’no good at all.”

He’s fucking with you. Probably gonna say something dumb like how you should give him the pan, let him dispose of those no good cinnamon rolls for you. “Dick,” you punch his arm for scaring you like that. He doesn’t mind. 

“You made these for me?”

“Yeah,” you say quietly, “For you.”

“For me,” he repeats, a soft smile on his face. You’re kind of baffled at his mood change, but you know what they say about men and food; the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, all that stuff. He steps closer to you, backing you against the countertop and turning off his oven, still wearing that smile, like he knows something you don’t.

“But I owe Tommy and Ellie one, too,” you continue, voice a little shaky. You’re nervous, why is he making you nervous? Joel sets his fork down and stares at you, lovingly, tenderly. “I made two batches before this, fucked both of those up. And then I ran out of sugar, actually. Tommy had to steal me some more.”

“I love you.”

His words hit you like a ton of bricks. He says it plainly, no frills. Just out with it. 

“You do?”

“Mhm,” he hums, “I do. Still would like an answer as to why you’re half-naked, though.”

Your face heats up. What were you saying? The cinnamon rolls, right. 

“I was– I don’t know. I had to knead the rolls by hand. The recipe said a stand mixer would be easier, but I didn’t…”, you trail off, feeling a little fuzzy, like you can’t think straight, your train of thought slipping away from you, “Didn’t have one. I love you too, actually.”

“I know,” he replies softly. He never doubted it for a second. Lord, he’s so handsome. His eyes sparkle more than usual, his fluffy curls untamed. The flannel he’s wearing suits him perfectly, and you can’t help but stare, stammering quietly. He reaches for your face with one hand, wrapping the other around your waist and pulling you close to his body, “I’m gonna kiss you now.”

Oh, fuck. You squirm out from his hold, away from the counter he held you against. Joel looks absolutely baffled as you smile sheepishly. “Can you grab me a plate for the Cinnabons?”, you ask, “I need to leave one by Ellie’s door.”

“I’d like to kiss you first, if you don’t mind,” he says, walking towards you. You keep walking backwards, around the kitchen table. Joel follows you as you look through his drawers for a spatula, opening and closing cabinets with shaky hands as you try to find a plate. Where are his fucking plates? Joel reaches for your hand to stop you. “Will you let me kiss you?”

“No.”

“No?”

“No.”

Joel’s missing something here. Has to be. You love Joel. Joel loves you. That’s been established, just like, two minutes ago. And you’ve been intimate with him many times before. The next logical step in this series of very out of order steps would be to kiss you. Unless…“Are you nervous?”, he asks.

“About what?”, you ask, “Kissing?”

“No, underwater basket weaving. Yes, kissing,” he sighs, “You seem nervous.”

“I’m not nervous,” you lie, “I’d just like to be the one to do it first.”

“Oh,” Joel replies, still a little confused, “Yeah, naturally. Makes sense.” He takes you by the hand and leads you to his living room, sits you on the couch and takes his place next to you. “Lay it on me, then.” 

“I can’t just–”

“You can,” he interrupts, coaxing you gently, “Come closer.” You scoot closer, but it’s not enough for Joel. Still wearing nothing but a thong and an apron, he lifts you by your ass and places you on his lap. Joel wears an expectant look on his face as you adjust yourself on his lap, feeling so awkward and out of your element. You’ve kissed people before, this should be no big deal. You’re not sure why you’re so nervous with Joel, especially when you’ve done everything else with him. 

“Joel, I– I don’t know where to put my hands.”

“Right here,” he whispers, placing your hands on his shoulders, “Or here,” he moves your hands to his jaw, his patchy beard prickly under your fingertips. “Wherever you want.”

“I like your shoulders,” you whisper, dropping your hands back to his shoulders. One of your hands slides to the back of his neck, playing with his soft curls. 

“S’good,” he says. And oh, his eyes. Brown and so warm, inviting, so beautiful. 

“Close your eyes,” you demand, intimidated by his stare. “Sorry. Close your eyes,” you repeat, softer. 

“My bad,” Joel replies, his eyes now shut. You’ve never noticed how pretty his lashes are before now. They’re gorgeous, so long. “They’re closed now.”

“Okay,” you breathe. 

“You got it,” he encourages. 

God, this is daunting. You close your eyes, lean forward…and smooch him right on the cheek. There. Easy. 

“Doesn’t count,” Joel murmurs through a smile, eyes still closed. Fuck. You adjust yourself on his lap, lean forward and…nothing. Joel waits. And waits. And waits. 

“I’m gonna kiss you now,” you say, trying to will yourself to just do it.

“Okay, sweetheart. You got it,” he whispers. But you don’t kiss him yet, and Joel keeps waiting, feeling himself beginning to grow hard as you keep squirming on his lap, adjusting yourself some more. “Hon?”

“Yeah?”

“Any minute, now.”

“I know,” you say, “I’m gonna kiss you.” But you adjust again. A minute passes with you on Joel’s lap as he waits patiently for you to finally kiss him. Another minute. And then you lean forward and – nothing. 

“I’m gonna count down from three, and then you’ll kiss me. How about that?”

Yeah, sounds like a plan. 

“Okay,” you reply. 

“Three…two…”, Joel counts, and you prepare once more to kiss him, “One,” Nothing. Joel sighs, “You’re killin’ me here.”

“I was about to do it, Joel.”

“Uh huh.”

“I was,” you argue, “You just keep talking and–”

“Oh, you’re so full of shit. You’re the one doin’ most of the talkin’, like usual.”

“That’s not true,” you argue, but are interrupted when he opens his eyes. That’s not supposed to happen. He wears a mischievous grin as he sits up and his hands begin to slide up your sides. Your already pounding heart begins to beat even harder, faster, because Jesus Christ, he seems like he’s about to kiss you. “What are you doing?”

“Ya got three more seconds to kiss me. Three…”

“Joel, not funny,” you scold as he takes your face in his hands. 

“Two…”

You’re beginning to panic, “Joel–”

And then he fucking kisses you, the bastard! No tongue, just a sweet, gentle peck. It’s despicable. You shove him back on the couch and glare at him, “You kissed me!”

“How awful,” Joel says with mock sympathy before he leans forward and kisses you again. You shove him again, harder.

“You asshole. I was gonna do it.”

“No, you weren’t,” he replies plainly. He tries to kiss you again, but you keep your hands on his shoulders, pinning him to the couch cushion. Joel’s smirking, but you’re scowling.

“Yes, I was.”

“Okay,” Joel laughs, “We can redo it, then.”

You sigh, “No, Joel, we cannot redo it. You already ruined it.”

“Is that right?”

“Yeah. That’s right.”

“Shit. S’too bad,” Joel feigns a sympathetic pout as he wraps both hands around your wrists that pin his shoulders, removing them from his body. He pushes your hands behind your back, holding them tightly as he kisses you again. And again, this time a little longer. Your lips begin to slide against his, and…god, they’re soft. The bastard.

“You’re ruining–”

“For the love of god, you’re drivin’ me fuckin’ nuts,” Joel mumbles against your lips. 

“I was supposed to–”

“No. You had your turn. We’re doin’ it my way now,” Joel says, “That means,” he kisses you, “M’gonna kiss you,” another kiss, “And fuck you,” another kiss, “As I please, because I love you,” he whispers. He kisses you before he maneuvers you to lay across the couch cushions, now pinning your wrists above your head under just one of his hands “And you can’t do a thing about it. Got it?” 

“I–”

He doesn’t let you argue further. Always so stubborn, you. “Good girl. Yeah, you got it,” Joel kisses you again. It’s different this time. Deeper, hungrier, messier. So much tension, time spent dancing around feelings, and it’s all out there now. His tongue slides past your lips and he tastes like cinnamon and sugar. You’ve been depriving yourself of him for too long. “And after all this, I’m gonna eat some of them cinnabons you made. And I won’t share, either.”

With his free hand, Joel unzips his pants to free his cock. “You know what you do to me, trouble?” he asks, breathing heavily. “Got me hard as a fuckin’ rock with all that squirmin’ ya did instead of kissin’ me,” Joel lifts the bottom of your apron up, exposing yourself to him, already dripping wet as he pulls off your soaked thong. You could have expected the ensemble wouldn’t have lasted long. And how are you already wet? One second you’re arguing about a stupid kiss and the next, he’s got you pinned beneath him and you’re dripping. You gasp as Joel gathers your slick with his fingers before stroking his cock, dipping his head back down to kiss you. He kisses your lips sloppily, then your cheek and down your jaw, your neck, nipping at the skin and soothing the marks with his tongue. It feels hot and passionate, and loving and dirty; all the best things at once. 

“Oh, god,” you moan as he kisses further down your body, still stroking his cock. He pauses momentarily to pull the strap of the apron over your head, then lifting your ass to untie the apron in the back. He pulls the fabric away from you quickly, tossing it on the floor. He kisses your chest, dividing his attention equally between your breasts. Pinching, twisting one nipple, kissing and licking the other, then switching. He leaves them wet with his spit as he kisses down your body, stopping before he reaches your pussy. “Joel,” you whine, “Please– need your mouth on me.”

“Oh, convenient. Now you want my mouth,” he breathes, teasing you.

“Please, I need it, need you,” you beg. 

“Wouldn’t ya know it, I need your mouth too.”

“So? Me first.”

“God, you’re a brat. Nice try,” Joel pulls away from your body, taking off his clothes quickly, “Said we’re doin’ things my way. Tryin’ somethin’ new today. Scoot,” he motions for you to move to the side. “On all fours, now. Come on, up,” you scoot to the side where Joel tells you to, slightly confused as you take the position. Joel takes his place next to you, wrapping his arms around your thighs and pulling you down to his face. “Sit,” he tells you.

“Joel,” you begin to protest. Surely he doesn’t want you to actually sit on his face, right?

“You trust me.” It’s not a question. He knows you trust him, he knows you know he’ll take care of you. Of course he will. His voice is firm, confident, “I need you to sit,” as he pulls your center to his mouth, wasting no time in pressing kisses into your folds, slick and sticky with your growing arousal. Your breasts are pressed against his soft stomach, hands gripping his meaty thighs. Freeing an arm from its place at your hip, Joel wraps his hand around his cock, rock hard with a swollen blushed tip. He uses his other hand to reach for your head, pushing your face towards his member. “Take me in your mouth,” he says. “See? We’re compromising. S’what people in love do.” What an asshole.

Wrapping a hand around his thick cock, you guide his tip to your mouth, pressing wet kisses against the smooth skin. He tastes like he always does, familiar and masculine, salty and sweaty, as you trace over his swollen veins with your tongue. Joel groans against your cunt as he parts your lips, your tongue still painting delicate swirls on his skin. 

“Yeah, attagirl,” he praises in a raspy voice, “Best of both worlds, ain’t it?” Joel laps at your cunt, moaning softly at the way you taste, your arousal almost as sweet and delicious as your cinnamon rolls from earlier. He keeps you held firm against his face as he licks you, alternating between drawing firm lines with the tip of his tongue and fat stripes with his tongue flattened. 

“Mmmm,” you moan, voice muffled by his cock. You’ve got him as deep as you can take him, your nose nudging his balls slightly as you cup them gently in your hand. Joel surprises you when he dips his tongue into your pussy, tasting every bit of your pussy. You stop what you’re doing, the only thing your mind can focus on is the feeling of his tongue working magic inside you.

He swats your hip, “Know it feels good, but it goes both ways, sweetheart.”

“Please, Joel,” you beg. 

“You know the rules,” he says, “You stop, I stop. Keep goin’, you’re suckin’ my cock so good, sweetheart. So good. Always do, you know that?” You begin to bob your head on his cock once more, Joel rewarding you with wet, sloppy, open mouthed kisses against your pussy. It takes everything you have to focus on his pleasure when he attaches his lips to your clit, sucking gently on the sensitive spot and humming against you. It’s not long before that familiar feeling begins to build in your stomach, your first orgasm washing over you. 

You gasp for air, “Oh my god, Joel,” as he works you through your climax. Joel never lets up, not once. He keeps sucking, licking your clit, his facial hair tickling your skin and only adding to the overwhelming sensation. Once more, your peak begins to build. “I’m– fuck, I’m gonna come again.” 

“S’the fuckin’ point, my love,” Joel mumbles quietly, and you can feel his smirk. Despite the rules, you’re not even sucking his cock anymore, your face instead resting on his body, haphazardly stroking his length as pleasure erupts from your core. You’re a moaning mess, pussy dripping and soaking Joel’s face. 

Joel gives you a moment to catch your breath. Underneath you, he places one last kiss right on your clit before he gently slides himself out from your body. You’re hardly coherent as he meets you once more, this time his face inches above yours, caging you in his arms. His cock bounces between your legs and he leans down to kiss you again. His lips are wet and you can taste your arousal on his tongue. “Look at that, I stole another one,” he taunts. 

“You’re a dick,” you breathe against his mouth, your body betraying you as you can’t help the smile that forms on your lips.

“Yeah, yeah,” and in one swift motion, Joel lines himself up with your entrance and pushes into you. He kisses you again, swallowing your gasp as he parts your insides, letting you feel every inch of him. God, he feels good. You’ll never tire of that stretch, that delicious feeling of being completely full of him. 

“Oh, Joel,” you moan. He pulls out slowly, then slides back in at a harsher pace, grunting when he bottoms out inside of you. He takes both of your hands in his own, pinning them above your head as he rocks his hips. It’s tender yet dominant, just how everything is with Joel. Just how you like him. 

“Love this pussy,” he purrs, “An’ I love you so much,” as he fucks you deeply, intensely. You whimper through his thrusts, each stroke fluid and firm and intentional. He knows your body like his own. “Takin’ me so good, sweetheart. You always do.”

You writhe underneath him, relishing in the pleasure he gives you. His name and sweet whisperings of love are all you can speak, each word coming out in soft, broken cries. The wet, sticky noises of your pussy fill the room, along with your moans and Joel’s grunting, groaning, and heaving breaths. You tilt your head to the side, arms still pinned beneath Joel’s hands. You kiss his wrists and bite his skin there gently.

“Come with me, baby,” he coos, adjusting the angle and finding that sweet spot inside you, that spot he knows and loves. He lets go of your arms, one of his big, masculine hands now on your waist, the other thumbing your clit. “Give me one more, sweetheart.”

It’s all it takes. His words send you over the edge, your pussy squeezing him, walls fluttering and pulsing with every thrust of his cock. “Fuck, Joel,” you whimper as he fucks you through your orgasm. You wrap your legs around his body, the heels of your feet bouncing against his ass, simultaneously pulling him into a tight embrace with your now free arms. Everything about this moment with Joel is perfect, the way he smells, his hot skin, how close and safe you feel with him. It sends Joel over the edge, too. With your name on his lips, your cunt gushing and pulsing around his cock, he spills inside you, painting ribbons of himself deep inside you as he helps you ride out your own climax as long as he can. 

He pulls out of you with a soft groan. He cleans you quickly with his t-shirt, a warm smile on his lips. He kisses your forehead, then sits back against the couch, catching his breath. You sit up too, and Joel holds out his arm as an invitation for you to curl into his side. Your head resting on his shoulder, you stare at him. All of his beautiful features, warm brown eyes, his smile lines, his aquiline nose. And then, you do it. You kiss him. Long and deep, passionate. Hours could be passing, you don’t know. 

Joel breaks the kiss. He pulls away from you, no longer smiling warmly. Instead, he wears his teasing grin. “Finally,” he smirks. He holds up his hand for a high five. Fucker. You roll your eyes, lifting yourself off the couch and buttoning Joel’s flannel over yourself. You make your way to the kitchen, finding a plate and placing two cinnamon rolls on them. You reach for an old pencil that sits on the window sill, scribbling ‘Ellie’ on a piece of nearby scratch paper and leaving it next to the plate. A deal is a deal, after all. 

“Don’t leave me hangin’, now,” Joel calls out to you from the living room. You turn around and he’s waving his hand, nagging you about his abandoned high five. 

You flip him off. Asshole. 

#strang3lov3 #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel miller x you #joel miller #strang3lov3 recs #the last of us #pedro pascal #the last of us hbo #pedro pascal joel miller #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal characters #mall rats!joel #mall rats joel #mall rats

[havecourage-darling]

I've always been yours // Eddie Munson

Prompt: "I think... I'm in love with him.” "Congrats on being the last one to find out" + the 5 ways to say I love you without saying I love you.

wc: 14K (I'm learning what brevity means y'all)

warnings: female reader, some implied sexual stuff towards the end but not really ish, friends-to-lovers, oblivious idiots in love, the beginnings of rockstar eddie.

Masterlist || AO3

1. Covering sharp edges with their hands, so you don’t get hurt.

You were going to get Max’s birthday cake absolutely perfect even if it fucking killed you, you thought to yourself as your arm ached the harder you mixed the batter.

“Are you sure you don’t need any help Nov?” Eddie asked again.

Pushing the hair out of your eyes with the back of your wrist, you huffed. “I’m okay. I think I adjusted the recipe perfectly this time. I just need to make sure there’s no lumps or the chocolate won’t-”

“I’M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU WHEELER!” You heard Dustin yell from the basement.

Eddie snorted. “Ten bucks on Mike,” he said from his place on the counter.

“I’m telling Dustin you said that,” you said, turning from your batter and shooting him a playful look over your shoulder.

He clasped his imaginary pearls dramatically. “Fair maiden, you dare betray our sacred friendship?”

Not able to keep your laugh down, you shook your head. Loud stomping alerted you to the shift of location of whatever fight was happening.

“Do not come into the kitchen with your shit!” You shouted.

Dustin’s voice floated in from the living room. “But Mike-”

“But Mike nothing!” You shouted. “You two shitheads work it out!”

“I didn’t do it on purpose!” Mike shouted, grunting right after. “Ow! Dustin!”

Eddie immediately huffed out laughter. “I’d listen to her, she’s on her fifth batch. Her face is getting whiter and whiter with each cake.”

Your hand flew up to your face, fingers coming back dusted in flour. Turning your glare to his grinning face, you rolled your eyes. “You couldn’t have told me?”

“And ruin how cute you look with all that flour on your face?” Eddie said, nonchalantly going back to the book in his hands. Doing your best to ignore the flustered expression you knew was growing on your face, you turned back to the batter. Eddie always managed to draw out reactions from you, you were sure that was the main reason why he kept doing it.

I like unnerving you he’d said. Asshole, you thought fondly, glancing at him. A good chunk of flour dusted down towards your hands at the motion. Christ, how much flour was on your face?

“I’m going to slap you the second I put this into a pan,” you threatened, trying to get it all off.

Eddie’s grin morphed into something more. “Promises, promises,” he winked.

And there went the butterflies in your stomach.

You opened your mouth to say something else when a blur of curly hair, black shirts, and a flying white shoe flung the kitchen door open.

“Guys,” Eddie warned, placing his book down.

“For fuck’s sake, what’s wrong now?” You said, putting the bowl down onto the kitchen island and stepping towards them with your hands on your hips.

Dustin was the quickest to speak up. “He borrowed the comic that I just managed to get and got it wet!”

“It wasn’t on purpose!” Mike shouted back. “I swear, Holly was eating at the table and spilled her soda!”

“Likely story!” Dustin snapped, eyes narrowing. “You’re doing it because I accidentally broke your figurines last week. I didn’t want to hit that pothole and go flying!”

“For the love of- it wasn’t on purpose!”

Dustin’s arms swung out and Mike darted left to avoid being hit. Before they could even crash together, you knew exactly what was going to happen.

As if in slow motion, you watched as Dustin shoved Mike’s arm into the mixing bowl. Without much prompting, your perfect batter, went tumbling off the island and flew with a vengeance in a million different directions. The opened bag of flour next to it, toppled right after it.

The silence as the bowl wobbled to a stop was painful. You blinked, shocked for a few seconds and nodded dumbly.

Well, that hurt more than the demobats clawing at your neck in the Upside Down.

“I’m going to rip your spines out and play jump rope with it,” you said calmly, eye twitching, at Mike and Dustin. The flour was splattered everywhere, including your new vans and the crevices no one was ever able to clean in the cracks of the linoleum.  

The two idiots shuffled closer to the door. At least they had the decency to look somewhat mortified. Before you could go through with your threat, Eddie’s hands came down to their necks and they both winced.

“Dudes, not cool,” he said, voice uncharacteristically serious. “She said don’t come into the kitchen for a reason. Now she’s gotta wait until you two assholes clean this all up before starting again.”

“Wha-” “But!”

Their protests quickly died down when he smacked them in the back of their heads.

“You break it, you fix it,” he said.

Hiding a smile, you rounded the island towards the rag by the sink and sighed. “Try to hurry, I want to get this decorated before midnight,” you said to the two apologetic teens who were already moving towards the mess.

Pushing the door out into the dining room you tried your best not to trek batter anywhere. Swiping the rag down your face and hair to get rid of any remaining flour you leaned down to help save your vans.

A sudden hand flying out towards your face made you flinch back. Falling onto your butt, you groaned as your hip smacked into the leg of the table.

Eddie shook his head, a soft expression on his face. Your eyes trailed down to where his hand was curled around the corner of the dining table. “Did I almost go face first into that?” You asked from where you were sprawled.

“Yeah, Nova, you almost cracked your skull,” he said, huffing a laugh. “I’d tell you to be more careful but it’d be a waste of breath.” Eddie tugged the rag out your hand and sat down by your feet.

“I-I am insulted.” The indignation cancelled out by the stammering. Eddie had picked up one of your, now dirty, sneakers and plopped it into his lap. He went about meticulously cleaning the chocolate off. “I can do that. You don’t have to-”

His brown eyes darted up to yours, silencing you. “I know I don’t have to; I want to.”

Mildly surprised, and a little flustered by his earnest tone, you nodded dumbly. By the time he was done, there was a pink tinge to his cheeks that you found stupidly endearing.

“There you go fair maiden. Good as new.” He bowed, dropping the rag onto the table. He offered his hand and pulled you up with a firm grip.

Warmth bloomed in your chest at the sight of his wide smile and soft gaze. “Thanks Eddie,” you said, smiling up at him.

He tossed an arm around your shoulders and pulled you towards the kitchen. “Come on, let’s go give them a little more hell,” he whispered, his breath tickling your ear.

Not one to resist, you beamed up at him and nodded. “Dibs on Mike,” you said, laughing when he did.

2. Covering you with a blanket when you look cold.

You met Eddie when you were in middle school but, you hadn’t really become friends until freshman year of high school. You were a cheerleader, one of the few freshmen on the team, and you’d caught Tommy Hagan cornering Eddie in a hallway.

You hadn’t hesitated at the sight of the stupid bully and had thrown your pompoms at his head. With a promise of a Herkie to the face, Tommy and his entourage had left you alone.

“Are you okay?” You asked him, bending over to pick up your tossed pompoms.

Eddie, however, hadn’t looked like he was two seconds away from being shoved into a locker. He was beaming. At you.

“What?” You asked, looking around at the empty hallway. “Do I have something on my face?”

“No, I just…didn’t ever think that my knight in shining armor would be a cheerleader,” he said, tone teasing.

Biting back a smile, you crossed your arms. “Why? Because we’re vapid and only care about our hair?” You cocked your hip.

“No,” Eddie said, straightening, “I swear, that’s not what I-”

Not able to help it, you burst out into laughter. “I’m fucking with you,” you said, hiding your laugh behind your hand. “I know Tommy’s little sister and she basically rules his household. He knows not to mess with her.”

Eddie smiled and you’d realized that he had a really nice smile. With a flourish, he bowed. “Well, I’m in your debt knight.”

Scrunching your nose, you shook your head. “Not a fan of the nickname?” He asked, starting towards the exit doors. Walking backwards, he drifted closer to you. “What about Nova?”

“What?” You laughed, surprised. “How’d you go from Knight to Nova?”

“Well, you’re my knight in shining armor – what’s brighter than a supernova?”

Throwing your head back, your laugh echoed down the hallway. You’d quickly become friends.

“Novaaaa, come on,” Eddie groaned, flopping down onto the sofa, “just pick a movie.” Clearly, almost a decade later, the nickname had stuck.

“Don’t rush me!” You told him, eyeing the three tapes in front of you. “Which one do you want to watch?”

Eddie’s head lolled back around to you and he smiled. “It’s your turn to pick,” he reminded you.

“I know, but-”

“Just put on Grease,” Eddie said, voice muffled by the pillow. You were about to protest, what an absolutely rude assumption, when a knock echoed from Eddie’s front door. “Pizza’s here. Pick a movie!”

Sighing, knowing that he’d had a bad week, you pushed Indiana Jones into the VCR. The smell of hot pizza wafted over to you and your stomach immediately roared – reminding you that you hadn’t had enough time to eat before your shift.

“Alright, alright, I heard you,” Eddie said, motioning to your stomach. He brought the box over, handing you some water and frowned at the television. “What’s this?”

“Indianamph Jonesah,” you said, around a mouthful of steaming pizza. You were going to miss your tastebuds but goddamn if it wasn’t a great mouthful.

Eddie rolled his eyes, pulled the tape out and shoved Grease in. Dodging your flailing arm, he dropped to the floor by the coffee table, his shoulder brushing your knee.

The opening music started and you found your eyes drawn to the screen. “What the hell?”

“I got that because I know you like to watch one of the same five movies after a long shift,” he said, picking up his own slice.

“But-”

He bumped your leg with his shoulder. “It was your turn to pick, I promise – I don’t mind. Besides, it’s starting to grow on me. It’s definitely better than Overboard.”

“Hey, that’s a good movie!”

Eddie rolled his eyes. “Right, and I’m Ozzy Osbourne.”

“Well,” you said with a smile growing, “you had the chance to bite off a bat’s head but you wasted that opportunity.”

Choking on his mouthful of pizza, Eddie laughed and shot you a soft look. “I’m glad my brush with death is something you can laugh about now.”

“Yeah, well, it’s been almost a year. Thought it was about time we all started joking about almost dying,” you said, “besides, Max started it.”

“I’ve never met another person with such morbid humor,” Eddie said, eyes following Danny and Sandy as they kissed on the beach. A flash of something shot through you but you ignored it.

You shrugged despite the fact that you knew he couldn’t see it. “I’m kinda proud of her for having it,” you said, bopping your head to the music you knew by heart.

I solve my problems and I see the light

We gotta loving thing, we gotta feed it right

Eddie turned to you suddenly, his eyes shifting. “Yeah, I’m proud of all of us.”

You grinned at him, dropping your plate onto the table and getting comfortable on Eddie’s couch. It was one of his better purchases – Wayne had chosen to accept the new trailer the state had bought him while Eddie had moved into a small one bedroom downtown. It made more sese considering it was close to the music store you both worked at.

“I’m not pausing the movie if you knock out,” he warned as you fluffed the pillow behind your head.

“I’m not going to fall asleep, when am I ever the one who knocks out first?”

Eddie shot you a look. “Did you want me to bring out a list or?”

Smacking the back of his head, he ducked and laughed when you half missed your target. “Alright, alright, I’m missing the good stuff.”

“I knew you liked this movie,” you said, nudging him with your knee. Eddie shot you a withering glare, or he tried to, because you laughed at his attempt. Amused, his eyes drifted to over your head and you were about to turn when something dropped into your lap.

Eddie pulled the crocheted blanket over your legs and let it pool around your waist. The black and white blanket had been gifted to Eddie by Robin. She’d decided she was going to learn to crochet last year and spent the entire months leading up to Christmas lost in her projects. Your green scarf was hanging with your jacket by the door. You loved this blanket and you knew Eddie did too – it was always draped across the sofa for easy access.

 “My place gets cold at night,” he said at your questioning look, “you know that. Besides, you’ll make it an hour before knocking out.”

The sweet gesture was overshadowed by his smug look and your hand jutted out to hit any part of him you could reach. “I’m not going to fall asleep.”

Both of you went back and forth, poking fun, and as you watched Danny ignore Sandy for Cha-Cha, you heard Eddie snort.

“What?” You asked, tapping your fingers along to the beat.

“I just always thought it was funny how he leaves her behind, he just goes with it,” he said.

You pointed to the cameras. “They’re on live television,” you explained sleepily.

“So?” Eddie raised his brow. “Are you defending him?”

“Of course not!” Why was this couch so comfortable? The blanket moved around you, warm hands tucking it over your shoulders and sighing when you snuggled into it.

Eddie’s knowing smile went a little fuzzy around the edges as your eyes felt harder and harder to keep open. Before you could formulate a comeback, the exhaustion of the day pulled you under. As you were entirely lost to the world, you heard Eddie murmur, “I would never leave you behind.”

3. Holding your hand when you’re falling apart.

Four years of cheerleading practice had not prepared you for what it truly meant to run for your life. Not really.

It stood to reason that you’d really never had to run from an interdimensional monster before – up until your employment at The Gap. Honestly, it was The Gap’s fault.

You’d met Robin at the first Hawkins Middle School band practice as small seventh graders. Her mom had told her she needed to get a job for the summer and she’d dragged you along with her. She had gotten hired at Scoops Ahoy and, in your defense, who was going to say no to a daily free ice cream? So, if you really thought about it – it was Scoop’s fault. And Robin’s.

The moment you saw Steve ‘The Hair’ Harrington behind the counter, you should’ve turned the other way. But no, Robin was absolutely sure he’d changed. You snorted. Sure, he’d changed. Having all your friends drop you towards the end of your senior year would humble anyone. You’d been close enough to the source when the downfall of The Hair happened. It hadn’t been pretty. Especially after Nancy Wheeler decided to stick by Jonathan.

While he hadn’t been one of the few who liked to remind you of your low spot on the totem pole, he definitely wasn’t Mother Theresa. You’d seen how his friends treated Eddie’s friends – people who they deemed outcasts. Eddie had only been mostly spared because you two were practically fused at the hip. Besides, he knew that Nancy liked you – the two of you had hung out before considering you’d both been close friends with Barb. While you and her weren’t best friends, you knew he didn’t want to mess with anyone Nancy liked. Which, really, made him a selfish, self-centered asshole. And anyway, you’d seen what he’d spray painted onto the theater header.

It wasn’t until you saw him with Dustin, one of your favorite neighbors, that you’d conceded. How could someone who clearly held a middle schooler up to such high standards be that bad? Besides, Dustin was a kid – but you trusted him. Robin, of course, still held that against you to this day.

To be fair, Steve himself hadn’t won you over until he’d taken hit after hit to keep you and Robin as safe as possible. Russians in a secret lab under Starcourt injecting you with truth serum was not something you’d had on your 1985 bingo card.

You still remembered how Steve had grabbed each of your wrists so tightly that it’d taken weeks for the bruises to fade. He’d practically tossed you both under a massive table when the Mind Flayer had landed mid-food court. Robin clutched at your shoulders, Steve a steadying presence behind you.

He’d waited, for hours, as the EMTs cleared all of you outside the burning mall. And while you’d hoped that this was the last time any of your friends, new or old, had tried to save you – clearly that had been wishful thinking.

The muscles in your arms burned as you hauled yourself through the gate. Breath knocked out of you as you landed on your back, you glanced up to see Eddie’s hands stilling on the makeshift rope.

“Come on!” Dustin screamed. “Eddie come on!”

A flash of something crossed his expression and you knew. You knew he was going to do something stupid.

“Eddie!” You screamed, voice cracking in your desperation. His wide eyes struck yours and you knew the moment he’d decided. “Don’t you fucking dare! Edward Munson, you listen to me right now. Climb this fucking rope.”

“I’m sorry Nov,” he said, staring up at you with a sad smile. Without thinking, you scrambled to throw yourself down the gate but the rope dropped by your feet, cut from the source. “I love you. Take care of Dustin,” he said, eyes sincere and apologetic.

“Eddie!” You both screamed, voices hoarse.

Panic clawed at your chest. You couldn’t breathe – he was…he was going to get himself fucking killed. Spurring into action, Dustin pushed you aside as he grunted from the effort of pushing the dining table towards the middle of the room. “Come on! Those things will kill him, we gotta get back!”

Not one to be told twice, you shoved a few pieces of furniture on top of the table for good measure. You climbed up to the gate, barely able to touch the edges. Adrenaline rushed through you as you looked down to Dustin. “Give me a boost, I can almost reach it!”

Without hesitating, Dustin kneeled, hands on your calves and you used his knee to hoist yourself up. You didn’t have much time to adjust yourself but you channeled every tumbling move you’d ever done and tried to tuck and roll. Mostly successful, you only winced as your shoulder collided painfully with the metal chair.

“Okay, I’ll be right back!”

“You can’t just fucking leave me here!” Dustin shouted. You pointed up at him with all the authority you could muster.

“Try to tie more sheets together, the others will need help climbing through when they come back,” you glared at him, “don’t do anything stupid Henderson.”

Not waiting for a response, you kicked the trailer door open and scanned the field. A tornado of bats and a loud, heartbreaking, scream cut through you.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, you fucking idiot,” you said, panicking as you ran. You watched as the bats took turns diving for him, his spear barely keeping them back.

“Come on!” He screamed into the eye of the storm. Because of course he did. The idiot. You willed your legs to run faster, to just get you there so you could help. Then, they struck. Eddie’s hands whipped up to his throat and you watched him slam into the floor.

“Eddie!” You screamed, throat raw, but it was drowned out by the screeching bats. A flash of Billy being impaled, lifted into the air, and thrown like a ragdoll bubbled up to your consciousness. No, please, you begged, not Eddie, not him.

Slowing as you neared, you pulled the gun from around your shoulders and squared them like Hopper had taught you. The shots echoed despite the chaos, your blood rushing through your body. “Get away from him!” You shrieked, fighting your way through the opening you’d created.

You slipped on the unmoving body of the ones you’d shot down and slid directly into an motionless Eddie. Covering his body with your own, you raised your gun as they swooped down. Almost out of bullets, you’d just hit another when one managed to swipe you from the side – claws digging into your skin. Screaming, you waved the gun like Steve’s bat and swatted as many as you could out the air.

Shit, you couldn’t keep this up. There were too many.

Then, as if puppets that were cut, they all dropped to the floor. One slammed into your bad shoulder painfully and you cried out.

“Nov?”

The weak voice was like beacon and you quickly slid to the ground. You weren’t going to question your good luck. Pulling the leather jacket off his chest your heart dropped down next to the dead demobats and you immediately started to cry.

“That bad huh?” He joked, voice wet as blood poured out his mouth.

“You absolute fucking asshole. You dickhead,” you berated him as you tied your own cargo jacket around the gash in his stomach. Rising to your knees, you quickly pulled your belt off your waist and made a tourniquet around his upper thigh. Your hands were drenched in blood and you forced the bile down. Focus, you need to stop the bleeding. You needed to get him back to the trailer, you yelled at yourself.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Eddie’s weak hand came up to your forearm and your heart creaked as the cracks deepened. “It’ll be okay.”

“No it won’t you fucking moron, you’re my best friend – I – can’t watch you die. I won’t,” you said, hauling him onto your lap. You tried to stand but your shoulder immediately gave and you both crashed to the ground.

A sob wrenched it’s way out your throat, helpless and willing your shoulder to work. Just this time, please, please, you begged.

“Nova,” Eddie’s voice trailed off, weaker than before.

Cradling his stupid face, your hands left streaks of blood on his pale skin. Shaking, your fingers caressed his jaw. The brown eyes, more familiar to you than your own, slowly started to fade.

“Eddie, stay with me, someone’s coming okay – it’s going to be okay,” you said, entire body clinging to his.

“I-I told you this was my year,” he said, blood tricking down. His unseeing eyes searched for you, like they always did, and you realized that you wouldn’t survive this. Eddie was going to fade from existence, the entire town thinking him a murderer, and this would finally be the storm that broke you.

“I can’t live without you,” you stammered, words bubbling up in rapid succession, you had things you needed to say – stuff you needed to do with him still. You were supposed to have time – it wasn’t supposed to end this way. Jaw aching as you bit down your anguish, you pressed a kiss to his forehead and he sighed. “Eddie, please,” you begged, unashamed and desperate.

Take me, you begged the dark skies that mocked you, anyone but him.

“I l-love-” he gagged, choking on his own blood and you pressed your forehead against his.

“Sh, sh, it’s okay, I’m here Eddie. I’m here. I know. Me too,” you said, tongue sticking to the roof of your mouth. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

Sorry you weren’t fast enough, sorry you couldn’t save him, sorry for having to be the one to watch him die. Eddie’s hand came up to your wrist, squeezing once before dropping limp.

The silence around you was deafening. No, no, no, no.

You screamed, anguished, and the pain unbearable. Anger coursed through you, mixing with your overwhelming grief. It crashed into you from all angles, its hands grabbing onto you and pulling you under. Your throat hurt but you couldn’t stop screaming, all of you couldn’t stop screaming in the unfairness of it all.

“Eddie?” A voice shouted through the darkness. You whipped your head up, searching through the night for the voice.

“Steve?” You called out tentatively, hand reaching for your discarded gun. Was this a trick? You scanned your surroundings, vision blurry. No, you steeled yourself, this place had already taken everything from you – they couldn’t have his body too.

Swinging the gun towards the quick footsteps, you ignored your trembling arms.

“Hey, hey! Wait, it’s me,” Steve said, hands up. He stepped in front of Robin, his eyes on the still body behind you.

Eyes wild, you blinked away your constant tears, and loosened the hold on your gun. “Stevie?”

“It’s me, it’s me – I promise,” he said, hand coming out to take your shotgun. Handing it to Nancy, he pulled you into his arms. “What happened?” He winced when he saw your skin bleeding sluggishly.

“Eddie?” Robin whispered, dropping to her knees beside him.

Willing yourself to keep it together you nodded towards the house. “What happened?”

“He’s dead, we got him – Nance got him. It’s over.”

Feeling weak, you leaned on Nancy’s outstretched arm and watched as Steve dropped to examine him.

“He’s – he – cut the rope – I tried, my shoulder – it, oh God,” you said, scrambling towards the nearest wall and throwing up everything in your stomach. A warm hand came up to your back, rubbing it back and forth until your heaving stopped.

“I got you,” Nancy said, “I’m here, it’s okay. I’m here for you.”

He was dead. Eddie was gone. Nothing would ever be okay again.Your blood-soaked hands reached out and she clasped them. Eyes on yours, strong and steady, she nodded. “You’re okay. I’ve got you.”

“Nance,” your voice sounded warped. “I tried.”

She shushed you, bringing your arm over her shoulders and taking most of your weight as you crumbled. You watched as Robin and Steve grabbed him, moving quickly towards the trailer.

“What? Where are you going?” Nancy shouted.

Robin grunted under the weight as she climbed the steps. “He’s got a pulse! The tourniquets are holding! We gotta move fast!”

.

Coincidentally, the nearest hospital to Forest Park was at the town line one over. Robin had assured you that since it wasn’t Hawkins, they weren’t likely to recognize him instantly. Worry for Max joined your overwhelming weight as you glanced at the destruction the earthquake had wreaked. “Do you think he got her?” You asked, voice barely audible.

“I killed him as the clock was chiming,” Nancy said, “it only rang three times. I’ll call when we get to the hospital – they’ll be okay. We’re all okay. We have to be.”

After admitting Eddie, a concerned nurse offered you a pair of scrubs to change into. Glancing down at your clothes, you realized you were covered in blood. Eddie’s blood.

Tearing up, her eyes had softened incredibly and she helped you wash it off. “It’ll all work out honey, you’ll see,” she whispered as the blood dribbled down the drain. You’d barely felt the needle as she stitched the claw marks on your chest and neck.

It’d taken an hour of arguing but you promised the others you could keep it together for the night as they drove back to Hawkins to figure out what was going on. Robin had kissed the top of your now clean hair, and clasped her hands with yours. “I will be back as soon as I can, okay? As fast as I can.” The fierceness in her tone had your eyes tearing up again and she hugged you tightly.

Five hours after being admitted, with no news, you received the second shock of the night.

“Hopper?” You sputtered, almost bowled over to see the ghost of your old Chief of police.

Head shaved, a few pounds lighter, but the smile that came from hearing your voice was just the same. “Hey kid,” he said, bringing you into a tight hug.

It took another hour, and the arrival of just about everyone you knew, for a nurse to let you know that Eddie had stabilized. They’d needed to operate to stop the internal bleeding, he’d needed a few blood transfusions and was placed into a medically induced coma, but he’d be alright.

“He’s…he’ll be okay?” You asked, not willing to cling onto any false hope.

The nurse from earlier stepped forward, her kind eyes wrinkled as she smiled. “Yeah, honey, he’ll be okay.”

Swallowing back your tears, you pulled her into a hug. “Thank you.”

Two hours later, while you sat glued to his side, Hopper let you know that Eddie was cleared of all charges.

“Do you want to know?” He asked.

Shaking your head, you smiled up at him for the first time in the last twelve hours. The sun peaked out from the horizon, drenching Eddie’s dark room in a warm orange light. “I don’t care how. Just – thank you.”

Hopper ruffled your hair and you leaned into his touch like cat arching for more affection. “They’ll want your statement but not until a few days from now. As far as you know, you were over Robin’s with Steve for the entire night. Her neighbor, Mrs. Matthews has already said she could corroborate your alibi.”

Smiling, you nodded. “I don’t even want to know what the U.S. government had on her.”

“You don’t,” he agreed.

It took Eddie another day to wake up. Wayne had finally convinced you to go get something to eat, I won’t leave his side sweetheart, I promise.

You balanced the two coffees in your hand as you pushed open the door to Eddie’s room. Surprised to see the entire party surrounded by the bed, you blinked, a little taken aback.

Dustin was the first to catch your eye, his grin so wide it almost split his face in two. “Eddie’s awake!” Your eyes darted to the bed, the man in it grinning up at a tearful Wayne.

“You absolute asshole,” you hissed, not able to keep it down.

The party laughed, Steve shaking his head. “Hi Nova,” Eddie said, voice hoarse, and you felt your stomach swoop as those eyes met yours. “I’m sorry.”

“You better be,” you said, handing Wayne his coffee. He promised to be back, wanting to speak to the doctor. The moment the door closed; chaos reigned. Everyone talked over each other and you watched, amused. Sipping your coffee, you smacked Lucas’ shoulder as he made fun of something Mike said.

Steve’s whistle was loud enough to pierce several eardrums and you winced. “One at time! The man just woke up from a coma.”

“Medically induced coma,” Mike clarified.

You fought the urge to smack him too.

Despite the severity of what brought Eddie to the hospital, after a week – he was given the all clear. The party was at Eddie’s new trailer, decorating the larger space for his homecoming. You’d been tasked to watch over the patient. You’d arrived early, still not entirely able to have him out of your sights for too long. As you popped your head in, you realized he was asleep.

Dropping into the comfortable chair next to his bed, you set yourself up for waiting. In the past week and a half, you hadn’t managed to find a moment alone with Eddie. There was always a party member at his bedside at all times. Or a band member. Or a parent.

Eddie’s room had quickly become well known for the noise and chattering that spilled out into the hallways. At its absence, you realized you didn’t know what to do.

Smacking his lips, Eddie’s head moved towards the door, eyes still closed. As he shifted, you caught sight of the large bandage by his neck. The purple bruising on his arms looked painful and your chest clenched at the sight of them.

It seemed that before you could decide for yourself, the silence swallowed you whole. Bringing you hand up to your lips, you tried to silence your sobs. Chest heaving with the effort, you buried your face into your hands and cried. The last week of pushing everything down and resolving to deal with it later had finally caught up to you.

Everyone has their reckoning, you were reminded. This was yours.

A warm hand came up to your shoulder, the bandaged one, and softly caressed where the tape adhered to your skin. “Hey you,” he said, sleep clinging to the corner of his knowing gaze.

“I’m sorry,” you sputtered, trying to push it back down but there was no use. Pandora’s box had been opened. Turning from him, you caught sight of his frown. His pained grunt made you whip back to him and you almost tripped over your own feet as you rushed to help. Eddie’s expression was twisted as he sat up, sweat beading at his temples.

“Lie down, you psychopath,” you said once the lump in your throat let you speak. “The bed will move for you! You just had surgery on your side for fuck’s sake.” You ducked your head, trying to avoid his eyes as you adjusted the bed to his liking.

Stubborn as always, Eddie tapped your forearm. “Don’t hide from me, not you,” he said softly, his eyes searching for yours. Giving in, you let your blurry sight find his and he sighed. “Nova, you should’ve told me.”

“Told you what?” You said through desperate inhales.

“That you’d been bottling it up – come here,” he said. You wished you could climb into the bed with him but you couldn’t, his incision still very off limits to movement. You were trying to decide where to touch, when he decided for you. His right hand opened, fingers wiggling towards you. “Come on.”

Interlocking your fingers with his, relishing in the touch, you pressed the back of his hand to your cheek. His pulse beat against yours, alive – wondrously and beautifully alive. This, this was what you needed. A moment to lose it before rearranging the bricks of your mental foundation back in place. The image of him, eyes unseeing, bubbled to the surface and despair twisted it’s venomous grip around your lungs.

Choking, you let the sob come out unbidden. Not sure you could stop it if you wanted to, you let the tears drown you. Weeping, you whimpered as you accepted what could’ve been. What you would’ve had to watch. The fact that you would’ve had something so important ripped from your grasp.

He's okay, you thought, he’s alive.

“I’m here,” he said, his voice a quiet echo of Nancy’s lost words. “I’m here. I got you.” After a few minutes, your chest stopped heaving and you could take a deep breath.

“I’m sorry,” you told him, a little embarrassed. “Thank you.”

“No, I’m sorry,” he said, pulling your hand from your face and towards his own. He pressed a kiss to your knuckles and you blinked at him.

“Why are you sorry?” Christ, you were a mess. He’d been in a coma for two days and he was comforting you. He’d almost died and you were too weak to be strong for your friend.

“I’m sorry for leaving you,” he said, “I’m sorry that you had to be the one I left behind. I’m sorry for scaring you. I’m sorry that you had to see me like that. I’m sorry for hurting you even if I’d do it again if it meant you were safe. It was scary and I’m sorry for doing that to you, no matter how important it was that I did it.”

His thumb caressed your hand and you bit back the tears that wanted to wail out to the world that you’d almost lost something that couldn’t be replaced. But the silence that fell was comforting, a soft and easy kind. One that didn’t need to be filled and his pulse was a balm soothing your raw panic.

And yet -

“Don’t leave me here alone. It’s your Sam calling,” you said, eyes on his. A small real, smile broke out on his face and he squeezed your hand.

Despite the bandages across his jaw, and the wince of pain as he shifted, you hadn’t seen someone look so beautiful.

“Don’t go where I can’t follow, wake up Mr. Frodo,” Eddie whispered and you beamed at him.

4. Telling you to call them so they know you got home safe.

“For fuck’s sake,” you hissed, rubbing your temples as you watched Robin hop on top of a bar table to dance.

Eddie’s laughter hit your ear and you shivered at the warmth. “Come on Nov, she looks like she’s having fun,” he said, chest pressed against your back. Tucking his chin over your shoulder, you finally waved down the bartender.

“Can I have another club soda please?” You asked, handing her the money. She nodded, eyes drifting to Eddie and smiling.

“You two are a really cute couple,” she said, sliding the glass towards you.

Opening your mouth to correct her, Eddie beat you to it. “Thank you!” At your glance, he shrugged. “It’s easier to go along with.”

Something in your chest tightened at the thought but you shrugged. “Jesus, Eddie, can you bring her down? She’s going to end up falling and cracking her neck.”

Eddie sighed, his warm hand coming up to squeeze your waist. “We really need to stop promising to be the babysitters,” he said, lips brushing against your temple before leaving to drag a protesting Robin off the sticky table.

“Hey,” a guy to your left said, his hair long and pin straight.

You turned to him, not wanting to be rude but also not wanting to make it look like you were welcoming any type of flirting. Eddie already had to shove a creep with a persistent attitude off of Nancy. “Hi,” you said, taking a sip of your drink.

“Sorry to bother you,” he said, a little too quiet for the noise level inside, “but is that the lead singer of Corroded Coffin?”

Relief flooded through you and your shoulders dropped. “Yeah, that’s him.”

“Holy shit, I saw his band last month when he was the opening act for Riot Act. I’m a big fan! They’ve got a great sound,” he said awed. “Sorry! I’m Jack.”

“Hey, I’m-”

“-here with someone,” Eddie’s voice floated over your shoulder and towards the straightening man on the stool.

A little surprised by Eddie’s furrowed expression, and practically thrown by the small ember of something in your spine at his serious tone, you placed a hand on his and smiled up at him. “This is Jack, he’s a fan of Corroded Coffin’s.”

Eddie’s expression completely transformed, a wide smile overtaking the sharp look in his eyes. “Oh man, thanks! Sorry, you know how these bars can get.”

“Yeah,” Jack said, brightening, “totally! Are you guys going to be playing somewhere else soon? I heard a few people say you might be going to Sold Out in Indianapolis!”

Eddie rubbed the back of his neck and you could tell he was flustered by the pink tinge to his neck. “We are! We’re going to be there for a few weekends for the next couple months. We start sometime in the summer. Still ironing out a few details.”

“That’s great! I’m sorry for asking but, do you mind signing something for me?” Jack asked, excitement growing his eyes.

Both of you thrown, you felt your own giddiness build in your chest. “He’d love to,” you answered for a stunned Eddie. “In fact, the entire band is here tonight. You’ll have to excuse everyone else – we’re the designated drivers. They might be a little drunk.”

At the promise of more autographs, Jack straightened. “Holy shit, yeah that’d be amazing. Thank you so much,” he stammered, grabbing a clear napkin from behind the bar and pulling a pen from his coat. “My friends are going to shit themselves.”

You squeezed Eddie’s hand when you saw it trembling as he signed with a flourish. Shooting you a grateful look, he walked Jack over to where Jeff and Gareth were chanting chug, chug, chug! at a teetering Liam.

Jesus, you sighed, rolling your eyes when Jeff’s excited hand swatted too close to Liam and he started coughing up the beer.

Turning back to your drink, you didn’t wait long before you felt Eddie’s palm at your lower back. “Well, that happened.”

Not missing a beat, you turned with a crumpled napkin and wide eyes. “Oh my God, sir, would you autograph my napkin too?”

Eddie laughed, shaking his head, and he shoved your shoulder. “Shut up,” he grumbled, motioning to the bartender for his own club soda. “You brat.”

Grinning, you bumped his shoulder with your own. “I’m glad I’ll be able to say I knew you when you were a nerdy freshman.”

“I’m still that nerdy freshman,” he huffed, “people just actually like my singing now.”

The band on stage switched to a fast paced song and the bar emptied a little as people flew to the dance floor. You couldn’t take your eyes off of him. They really deserved this. You crossed your fingers beneath the bar and hoped it was just the beginning.

“To be fair, I always liked your singing,” you told him, poking his chest. Eddie’s eyes shifted and you felt the same tightening again.

His eyes dropped back to yours, something new swimming in them, and your breath stuttered in your lungs. “I know you have,” he said, gaze darting across your face. “You’ve always been there for me.”

Not able to take the pressure in your sternum, you huffed. “And don’t forget that when you’re rich and famous, okay? I want a fancy BMW so I can taunt Steve with it.”

Eddie threw his head back and laughed. Instead of breaking the spell, your eyes drifted to his neck and you briefly thought about how appealing the muscles there were. Straightening so quickly that your spine audible snapped, you swallowed nervously.

What the fuck was that?

The look Eddie shot your way let you know that he’d caught whatever that was. Your mind raced in a thousand different directions but before you could choose a route to go down, a body pressed itself into your side.

“You guys, Jonathan puked,” Gareth said, matter of fact. “It was funny but then Steve started gagging.”

Liam joined in next, his eyes glazed. “Steve said he’s a sy-symp- sympat-” his face scrunched together when he realized he wasn’t getting the word out.

“He’s a sympathy puker?” You guessed, already knowing Steve wasn’t the best around puke. He was always the first domino to fall during hangover mornings.

“Ugh, you’re so smart,” Jeff complimented.

Brows rising, you elbowed Eddie. “Time to corral?” Sighing, Eddie nodded.

“Grab as many as you can and shove them into the right car,” he said, hands coming out to grab his bandmates before they could drift off. “Meet outside in ten?”

“Minutes?” You asked incredulously. “It’s going to take at least that long to get Steve to stop gagging.”

“Bet you five I can get them out in fifteen.”

Rolling your eyes, you slapped his outstretched hand. “That’s an easy win.”

And sure enough, you leaned against Steve’s car with an amused expression as Eddie tried for the fourth time to load Jeff into his van. You glanced at Robin, who was talking animatedly with Gareth about what sounded like cheese fries. A blur in the corner of your eye caught your attention and you watched Liam open the passenger door and pass Jonathan his joint.

“Jesus,” Eddie groaned, “okay you win, please, just-” he waved his hand towards your friends.

“Robin get in the car we have to go now,” you said firmly, knowing she was the hardest to convince but the one everyone would follow once she was.

Her expression morphed into indignation. “Gareth thinks bacon on fries is better than cheese! That’s – that’s treason.”

“Because it is better!” He said, clutching his head.

“Alright you two, you’re both right, how about that?” You turned to Gareth and glared until he simpered off towards Eddie without a backwards glance. “And you, into the car.”

“But-”

“I’ll tell everyone what you’re hiding in the box at the back of your closet,” you threatened. She paled and tripped in her hurry to the car. She knocked into a sleeping Nancy, who grunted when she landed in the middle seat with a loud thump.

“Byers, get your ass in gear or I’m telling Joyce!”

A sheepish Jonathan crawled into the car, jostling Robin who cried out and accidentally smacked a snoring Steve in the passenger seat. You quickly shut the door and locked them in. With a flourish, you took your bow and Eddie clapped. “I admit defeat o’great knight.”

“Knight in shining armor, please,” you clarified.

“Of course, of course.”

“You okay with your lot?” You asked, nodding to where Liam was starting to look a little green.

Eddie snorted. “Yeah, they’ll be fine. What about you?”

“Jonathan and Nancy live nearby, the rest of us are crashing at Steve’s. Like the good ol’ days,” you joked, shivering when a sudden cold gust of air blew your hair into your eyes.

A pair of hands came up to your arms, rubbing some warmth into them and you smiled. “Lucky, Gareth and Liam live in completely different directions,” he said with a roll of his eyes. You pointed to car behind him.

“You should lock them in before one makes a break for it,” you said, yawning and checking the time. Without giving you time to think, Eddie pulled you into a tight hug. Never needing a reason, you wrapped your arms around his waist and squeezed just as tightly back. His cold nose nudged your temple, inhaling deeply and you lean your face against his chest. His heartbeat fast and yours quickly matched its pace. With a soft sigh, Eddie let you go.

“Hey, but seriously, I’m so happy everyone else is finally seeing what I always did,” you told him, pinching one of his cheeks for levity.

Instead, he smiled at you softly. A small, little shy smile that made your heart flip. “Yeah?” His eyes softened, the brown deepening with his gaze. You felt your chest tighten painfully this time. Turning back to hop into your car, you rolled the window down and Eddie leaned into your space.

“Don’t let it get to your big head.” Eddie smiled at your barb but his eyes trailed down your face, the look in his gaze different. You leaned back to examine it but you couldn’t put your finger on it. “What?” His eyes darted back up to yours and it clicked. It looked like he knew something you didn’t.

A little surprised at what he saw there, he shook his head. “Nothing, nothing, see you tomorrow at work?” That sounded like a diversion. You had a full shift tomorrow but he was on towards the end at closing.

“Yeah,” you said, not sure you wanted to let go of this. As if sensing it, he surged forward to press a kiss to your cheek and you blinked, surprised.

“Drive home safe, call me when you get there, okay?” He said. “Leave a message if I’m not home yet. I won’t be able to sleep if I think you’re dead in a ditch somewhere.”

That, in the end, got a smile out of you. “Who would’ve thought you and Harrington would turn into the mothers of this ragtag group?”

“Hey,” he said, hands on his hips in a clear imitation of Steve, “you love it.”

“Yeah,” you said, starting your car and rolling up your window, “I do!”

5. Bringing you something just because it reminded them of you.

“Fuuuck,” you squawked, feet sliding out from under you. Bracing for the impact, your eyes flew open when Eddie’s hands slide through your underarms and steadied you. He pulled you up, your knees aching, and you both stilled.

“That…would’ve been bad,” you said quietly, looking down at the wet pavement outside the Wheeler’s house. Eddie’s eyes were wide, his gaze on the puddles.

“Note to self, slippery driveways might take down the mighty Nova but demobats are a walk in the park,” Eddie said, grinning when you whacked him.

“Ugh, they’re still outside,” Dustin shouted from the doorway, “come on, we’re taking a vote on which movie to watch first.”

Despite his teasing, you felt Eddie’s hand on your back – steady – as you followed Dustin towards the basement. Everyone was scattered, a few conversations going on at once. The party was back for the summer from college and, as tradition stated, a movie night was set on the first weekend.

El jumped up, grinning, and threw her arms around you. “Oh, hello,” you said, squeezing her tightly, “I’ve missed you.”

“Missed you,” she said into your shoulder, words muffled. You glanced up to see Max tucked into Eddie’s embrace. He smiled when they swapped and Max’s grip bruised you. Kissing her temple, you watched them tumble back onto the first couch – Mike and Lucas waving at you both.

You made to step towards a beaming Will when a hand on your elbow stopped you. “Hey, I forgot to give this to you yesterday at work,” Eddie said, hand ruffling around in bag. He grinned after a moment, pulling it out triumphantly. A small drawstring bag swung wildly for a moment before coming to a stop. The black suede looked soft and lumpy.

“We just started that gig out at Sold Out last week and we were looking for something to eat before we drove back. I saw this in the window of a store and thought of you,” Eddie said, making your heart flip. You reached for the bag, a gold necklace spilling out the mouth.

“It’s a sunflower,” you said, voice faint, thumb tracing the small blooming flower.

Eddie nodded, already rooting in his bag for something else. “You said that was Barb’s favorite flower, right?” Suddenly, it felt like the entire room had gone quiet.

“It was,” Nancy said, leaning over your shoulder to look at the pendant. “She loved them, her room was covered.” An old memory flashed through your mind.

You’d met Barb when you were six, in kindergarten. She’d shared her chocolate with you and picked you as a partner for nap time. She had a sweet smile and gave great hugs. She was good and kind, and you’d been angry at the world for taking her. For a lot of things.

“Sunflowers symbolize friendship. But really, they just make me smile.”

For a moment, just a brief second, you could hear her light laughter echo within your memory. Nancy’s soft smile let you know that you weren’t alone.

“I thought you’d like it,” he said with a smile and you knew he was thinking of the tulips you’d both left at Chrissy’s grave last week. “This way you can have her close by.”

Nancy helped you clasp it around your neck and smiled down at you. Sound filtered back in as she grunted and turned to the boys. “Don’t throw the remote!”

You scrambled to stand before Eddie could find a seat, your had grabbing his. He stilled, looking back at you – the unasked question on his lips. Taking a step forward for a hug, for a second time within a span of five minutes, you tripped on a forgotten figurine. Eddie cradled you to him, staggered, but steady.

“Okay, I stand corrected. Rainy driveways and dnd figurines,” he joked, the smile from his gaze fading when he realized how close you’d landed.

The world moved around you both in a blur. This moment, you in his arms, had happened hundreds of times. You’d known Eddie for years, both of you were affectionate people. But this…was different. Time slowed and you felt Eddie’s pulse ricochet within your own, his lips parting in surprise. You eyes darted down to the movement, his lips chapped and in this bubble you’d created – a thought crossed your mind.

You wanted to press yours to his. You wanted to press every part of you against his.

Then, quickly, a second thought rose from your subconscious.

This wasn’t the first time you’d wanted to kiss him. It wasn’t the first time that your heart felt like it would burst at the sight of him. You liked the way your skin felt electrified at his touch. The way he always seemed to focus on you. The way you both always gravitated towards each other, like sunflowers bending towards the sun. Your eyes dipped lower and you felt a lump form in your throat. The way…you were dying to bite into that tattoo on his neck. The way you wondered if he’d squirm against you. If he’d push you into the-

Holy fucking shit, you loved Eddie. You were in love with Eddie. Your best friend. How the fuck had you been so blind?

Stumbling, you staggered back from his touch – not able to think clearly with him so close. You ripped your arms away from him and greedily sucked in air.

“What’s wrong?” Eleven asked you, realizing you were all but hyperventilating.

Pulse roaring in your ears, you didn’t know what to say. Dumbstruck, your limbs went numb as you finally met Eddie’s worried eyes. He stilled at the sight of your expression and suddenly the rug was pulled completely out from under you because he knew. The look in his eyes was one of complete and total understanding.

And you knew that he knew - and he knew that you knew that he knew.

Your mind flashed back to the moment outside the bar a few months ago. That look in his eyes. The way he’d been acting strange recently. He looked at you like he knew something you didn’t. Struck, you’d honestly be less shocked if the ground opened up and Vecna swallowed you whole.

His own panic flooding his face, he took a step forward.

“No!” You shouted, a touch too loud, your soul flying out your body and staring down at the situation with terror.

“Wait, just wait,” Eddie stammered, hands raised like he was approaching a scared animal. “Let’s talk about it.”

“Oh shit,” you heard Dustin mutter. The rest of room went silent.

Robin groaned, a soft thump following. “Oh no, this isn’t good.”

“Right now?” Steve hissed. “What the hell changed?”

“What the hell is happening?” Lucas grumbled.

Max sighed. “She just realized she’s in love with him.”

Eleven’s eyes widened and Lucas frowned. “Congratulations on being the last one to find out,” he said and somehow that made it worse. Your face crumpled and everyone’s glare turned towards him.

“Jesus Sinclair, have you heard of tact?”

Were you the absolute last person to know?

He was your best friend – you couldn’t, this would ruin everything. Oh God, what if he’d known and he never said anything because he didn’t feel the same? What if he did? You honestly didn’t know which was scarier.

As your friends descended into chaos, you glanced back at Eddie and found him frozen too. Overwhelmed and feeling like you’d been knocked around the ring a few times, you let your flight instinct take over. Taking the stairs two at a time, you were at the basement door in seconds.

Chaos erupted behind you.

You were at the door and fucking Christ, you couldn’t breathe. Why couldn’t you breathe? Was the ground shaking?

“Stay here,” you heard Eddie bark at everyone, his had tone not leaving any room for argument. Despite it all, you felt the zing of something travel down your spine at the sound of it. Before you could even analyze it for what it was, it triggered another fresh wave of panic.

You knew he’d be close behind, but you were used to running for your life at this point. Practically racing down the driveway, you scrambled into your car and slammed the door shut. Your first mistake was trying to still your shaking hand to get it into the ignition.

A body half-slammed into your passenger door and you screamed, terror taking over your rational side for a moment.

“Sorry! I’m sorry! The fucking grass is wet and I slipped,” Eddie said, backing up with his palms up. “Nova, please, don’t go. Not like this. I-”

“Nope!” You said, feeling like a stupid child but you weren’t able to process right now. You’d known Eddie since you were fourteen. That was a decade. How the fuck had you been so blind? “I can’t – Eddie, I can’t! Just give me a second, okay? I need – I need to process. Alone.”

The world felt like it was crumbling. Like you were back in the hell hole, clinging to Steve and Eddie for balance as the ground shook beneath you. Oh God, this was going change everything.

Your second mistake was turning to look at him. The knot in your chest tightened beyond belief at the sight of the heartbreak in his eyes. A flash of movement brought your attention to the several heads peeking out from the windows. Eddie’s head whipped around and you could feel his glare from where you sat. “Jesus Christ, does anyone know what privacy means?” You knew it was bad when you couldn’t even muster up a smile.

“Nov…”

Like a cornered animal, you felt tears well up. “Please. I’m sorry. Please Eddie, please.” Panic clawed up your throat, threatening to pull you under. Black dots danced across your vision.

He smiled and your heart broke at the emptiness in it. “Yeah, Nov, it’s okay. I’ll go back inside, just- take a few deep breaths before you go. Okay? Don’t drive like this. Just, deep breathing, remember?”

You slammed your eyes shut; you didn’t have the strength to look at him anymore. You nodded, taking an unsteady deep inhale. How was it possible that you were the one running and he was still thinking of you?

Not sure how long you sat there but by the time you opened your eyes, your tremor had settled and Eddie was gone. Taking a deep breath, you turned your car on and peeled away from the Wheeler house.

It took Robin and Steve exactly ten hours before they showed up on your doorstep.

“I know you’re in there asshole, open up!” Robin screamed.

Jesus. You flung the door open and glared. “I have neighbors.”

“You look like shit,” Robin said, matter a fact, with a small smile on her face. You groaned, dropping your face into your palms and Steve sighed.

“For fuck’s sake Robin, it hasn’t even been a day,” he said, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and guiding you to the couch.

Not one to ever be excluded, Robin smushed herself next to you. Her thigh pressed against yours and you found yourself stuck between your two friends – friends you hadn’t ever been good at lying to.

“I know why you’re here,” you started.

Robin snorted. “Well duh, what’d you think? That we got up at nine in the morning to come wish you a good morning? Even Dingus knows better than that.”

Biting back a laugh at her quick retort, you caught Steve’s exasperated glance and nearly broke. “Do not enable the behavior,” he hissed. “How do you feel?”

What a loaded question.

“I feel a little numb. Sort of, like, if I don’t acknowledge this is happening then it isn’t,” you said, pinching the bridge of your nose, “which, I guess, is what got us both into this mess in the first place.”

Robin’s expression softened and you sighed. “I’m just…I feel embarrassed mostly. I didn’t mean to be so dramatic – I just…I was so overwhelmed and it felt like I was drowning. You were all staring at us and I couldn’t think – I couldn’t breathe.”

“Hey, give yourself some credit,” Robin said, “you needed space and time and you asked for it. Everyone needs to understand that boundary.”

“Except for you two,” you joked weakly.

Robin huffed, waving a hand in the air. “We don’t have boundaries-”

“-we should though-” Steve muttered.

“-once you’re tortured by Russians together, you’re bonded for life,” Robin continued, ignoring Steve’s scrunched expression.

They started to bicker good-naturedly and your mind drifted to Eddie. You felt horrible but it didn’t override your need to crawl under the covers and hide yourself from the world. The one question on your mind refused to be put to rest.

“How could I have been so blind?” You wondered, not realizing you’d said it out loud until Robin leaned some of her weight onto you.

Steve pulled himself closed to the edge so he could turn to look at you. His gaze was gentle, eyes on you. “I mean this genuinely with no judgement, but how could you not have noticed?”

You threw your hands out, Robin dodging your left one expertly. “I don’t know! I think I knew on some level and just ignored it? Its…scary, feelings this big for someone who’s your best friend. I’m so scared, I don’t want to lose him,” you admitted quietly. Steve sighed and you glanced at him. “When did you guys know?”

Steve frowned but Robin spoke first. “To be fair, I don’t think Eddie knew right away either. At least not that I could see and we’ve known each other for a while now too. I realized sophomore year,” she said. “You always had those damn starbursts around. I know your favorites are the red ones because Dustin tried to take one from your stash and you almost chewed his hand off.”

A pile of starbursts were tossed onto your kitchen counter now. “So?” You asked, confused at the connection.

“They’re Eddie’s favorites too and you always let him grab them. I don’t think he even knows you do that, to this day. Let’s not forget how any time either of you ever went on a date or, God forbid, had a relationship, the other was always in a constant mood.”

Before that could sink in, Steve stirred. “I realized when he’d come to visit you at Scoops. Remember when I’d smushed that sundae into you. We were waiting on Robin to come back, worried about the Russians and you’d insisted on staying to help us. You had finally decided I was worthy and we were laughing about something stupid Dustin had said.”

You knew what moment he was talking about – you’d forgotten to call Eddie and tell him you didn’t need a ride home anymore. He’d arrived, on time as always, and walked in on you and Steve wrestling over some spilled ice cream.

“I turned with your ice cream too fast and hit your chin. I was trying to clean it off but you’d taken a handful and shoved it down my uniform. Dustin was practically on the floor laughing and I was chasing you with the bowl. Eddie walked in and instantly hated me. I knew he thought I was flirting with you, which I wasn’t. It was something in the way he looked at me. He wasn’t mad that he thought I liked you, he was mad because he thought I wasn’t worth your time – you know? He wasn’t even jealous, just protective,” he said with a shrug. “With you, it took a while, I think. I wasn’t sure if you felt the same for some time. Not until I knew you better.”

“Oh,” you said, throat dry. “Did everyone know but me?”

Steve bumped your shoulder amicably. “Maybe. It’s obvious to everyone now but it’s because it’s like you’re two magnets. The second the other is in the vicinity, your gravitate together. It’s…natural, almost. Something you’d expect,” he nodded, blinking down at you. “Does that make sense?”

“No,” you said petulantly at the same time Robin nodded.

Rolling her eyes, she grasped your hands and squeezed them. It was reminiscent of that moment in the emergency room, her eyes wide but determined.

“What do you want to do about it?”

You shook your head. “Too big a question.”

Steve took over. “Okay…how do you feel? You can love him as your friend, or be in love with him as a person, but if you don’t want to risk that – it’s up to you. We can have our own opinions-”

“-that you two need to get your heads out of your asses-” Robin said, expression furrowing.

“-but,” he said, shooting her a look, “it’s your choice.”

Feeling like your chest would explode with it, you abruptly stood, needing the space to pace a hole in your carpet. Chewing on your nail, you flung another hand in the air and frowned. “Of course I love him, how could I not? He’s…he’s Eddie. He’s my Eddie. Sometimes, at night, before going to bed I think about it you know. I think about how we were too close to be just best friends. We did things that went far past platonic and it was addicting. I – fuck. I love him. I love him.”

Shoving Steve’s hand off her shoulder, Robin stood, her arms coming down to your shoulders and shaking you. “So, I ask again, what do you want to do about it?”

You started to shake your head but she shut it down. “No, enough with this. You’re the bravest of us all. What do you want to do about it?”

“Robin-”

She waved a hand in Steve’s direction, her blue eyes turning sharp. “Say it.”

The knot in your chest choked you as you swallowed nervously. You wrung your hands together but you knew. You didn’t feel unsettled and panicked because you didn’t want him – you felt off kilter because he wasn’t here. You’d run away when you really wanted to just be with him. You’d hurt the one person you never wanted to hurt.

“I want – I want to tell him. I need to tell him!” You said, spine straightening.

Robin smiled. “There she is.”

“Oh my God,” you said, hands coming up to your face. “I just ran away; he must be freaking out.”

Steve stood, grabbing a yellow starburst. “He was a little…freaked out.”

Guilt flooded you as Robin glared at him.

“Shit, I need to talk to him. Right now. Where’re my shoes? I need to go!” You ran around your living room, frantically looking for your converse.

How the fuck could you have just left him behind? Without telling him – without saying the words. Suddenly, you remembered.

“Fuck! He’s in Indianapolis,” you said, slumping into a nearby chair, “he won’t be back until Sunday night.”

Steve frowned, his hands inching towards a red starburst and you shot him a glare.

“I’m distressed but not dead, get your hands off the red ones,” you snapped.

Robin laughed, knowing glint in her eyes and she grabbed a set of keys from your front table. “You have a fucking car and Indianapolis is three hours away, not across the country. Get what you need and let’s go.”

.

“Get off, you’re squishing me!” Max hissed at Lucas.

“Where do you want me to go? It’s a small car!”

“Will you two shut up?” Dustin snapped.

Robin sighed from the passenger seat and you took the same left as Steve did ahead of you. “You know, I don’t know why you all thought it’d be fun to make this into a group road trip,” she sighed, “you really don’t know how to mind your business!”

You snorted at the hypocrisy of the situation and she shot you a look. Shutting up, you made sure to stay behind the maroon BMW.

“We can’t miss this,” Dustin stressed, “he’s been in love with her for the entire time I’ve known him. I can’t deal with all the pining anymore. I get to see this through!”

You glared at him through the mirror. “We are not a soap opera to entertain yourself with,” you snapped.

By the time you’d made it out to your car, the rest of the party had managed to bike to your apartment with their own nosy agendas. Once they’d found out you were going to drive down to Eddie’s gig, they climbed into your cars – not leaving room for arguing. Because God forbid any of you do something without the entire party knowing.

“You probably won’t even be let in, this is a twenty one or older bar. As in, where they serve alcohol.”

“So?”

Robin shifted around to glare at them. “As in, you’re all not twenty-one yet?”

“Robin, please, what do you take us for? Rookies?” Dustin asked, his brow quirking. “I’m basically Corroded Coffin’s manager-”

“-you’re really not,” you said, thinking of Charlie, Gareth’s cousin who handled all the gigs and scheduling.

“-and I’ve got passes to all their gigs, it’ll be easy.”

Sharing a look with Robin, she shrugged. “Whatever, don’t whine about it to me when you’ve got to stay in the car the whole time.”

Not twenty minutes later, you both rolled your eyes at Dustin’s smug look as the bouncer let them all through with bright green bands indicating they couldn’t be served alcohol.

“Shut up,” Robin hissed.

“What time is it?” You asked, grabbing Steve’s wrist. “Shit, they go on soon – I think I can still catch them backstage.”

“Go, go!” Robin urged, shoving you forward.

Shouldering your way through the crowd, you were astounded at how packed the bar was. Determined, you kept slipping through the restless horde of people. You’d gotten halfway through when a loud strum stopped you. The crowd came alive, cheering and screaming as Eddie sauntered on stage.

Your heart dropped at the sight of the bags under his eyes. “Hello Indianapolis! How are you all tonight?”

The crowd went wild and you were jostled forward, right towards the front. Eddie was a few feet away and you sighed. Of course.

The band went through with introducing themselves, like they always did before starting, and you resigned yourself to catching him after their set. You watched Eddie swing his guitar over his shoulder, adjusting the strap. You don’t know how, in the sheer amount of people in the crowd, but as his eyes swept across the front row – they zeroed in on you.

Surprised, you blinked up at him. His answering grin was so wide, it cracked your heart further. Your breath rushed right out your lungs. Frozen, you stared up at him, and wondered how you could have ever been so blind as to not notice the way your heart always leapt around him. It rattled around in your ribcage, like a police siren. Him, we want him, it shouted at you, grinning up at you when you tried to knock it back into place.

I know, I know we do, you told it.

Of course you loved him, it was Eddie. How could you ever have thought otherwise? You wanted his friendship, because that was the most important part, but you wanted more. You’d always wanted more and you weren’t going to let fear keep you from reaching for it.

Eyes not leaving yours, he grabbed the mic again. “So, I have someone important in the audience today – someone who means a lot to me. She hasn’t heard our newest cover yet but, it’s one of her favorite songs. I’ll admit, it’s never been one of mine but I changed it around a little for her and hope you all like it too.”

Raising your brows at the first few notes, you couldn’t keep your delirious laugh in when you heard him start singing.

“Ooh, baby, do you know what that's worth?

Ooh, Heaven is a place on Earth.”

Eddie’s voice lowered as he rasped out the vowels, the drums transforming the song entirely.

You watched Eddie transform, he always put his entire being into the performance and you loved watching him relish in it. Bobbing your head to the song, you danced alongside the three girls to your left.

Catching his eyes towards the end, he grinned as he inhaled.

“In this world, we're just beginnin'

To understand the miracle of livin'

Baby, I was afraid before

But I'm not afraid anymore.”

A smile made it’s way onto your face as you shook your head and you knew he’d caught it by his laugh. Staying right in the middle, with the crowd’s energy pulsing around you, you sat through the entire set.

As Metallica rung through the speakers, you knew it was their closing song. Eddie nodded towards the side door and you started to make your way there.

The guard at the door stood at your approach but the door behind him opened in time for you to catch Charlie’s smile. “She’s good,” she told him, “whenever you see her around this summer, let her through. She’s with Munson.”

The burly guard smiled then. “Oh, you’re his girl? Don’t worry, I never forget a face.” He waved you through and you knew she could read the mild embarrassment in your eyes.

“Don’t worry, I won’t pry,” she said, elbowing you, “but I’m happy for you two. Anyone with eyes can tell you’re gone on each other.”

Right.

“I’ve got to help them pack but you’ve been to the green room in the back – he’ll come by when they’re done.”

Thanking her, you stumbled your way there – nerves finally taking over you. You should’ve thought about what to say – how to say it. God, why did you feel so awkward? You’d fought monsters from another dimension but you couldn’t tell your best friend that you loved him?

The door suddenly burst open and Eddie came in, guitar still in hand and hair stuck to his skin. “Hey you,” you said, standing from the velvet couch. “You were amazing.”

“Yeah?” Eddie said hopefully, putting the familiar guitar down and turning his full attention to you. “I thought you weren’t going to come.”

“There was a full house, I – I’m so happy for you guys. Are you booked full for tomorrow night too?” You asked despite knowing the answer. You needed a moment, just a brief moment of normalcy before you flung yourself off the metaphorical cliff.

Eddie nodded, a ghost of a smile flashing across his face. He knew. He knew that you knew that he knew. Because of course he did. But he was letting you take this at your pace, because Eddie never did anything you didn’t want to. He always let you lead.

He opened his mouth, no doubt ready to let you distract yourself, but you were done with the pretenses.

“Fuck it,” you said, surging forward. A flash of surprise was the last thing you saw before you slammed Eddie into the wall and pressed your lips to his.

Finally! Your heart sang, finally, we’re home.

Eddie took a second but after a beat he met you just as fiercely. His grip was bruising on your waist, his other hand coming up to the back of your neck. Not giving him a chance to take the lead from you, you ran your fingers through his hair and pulled his head back. He moaned and the sound shot straight to your stomach. Butterflies in full force, you leaned back, out of breath and saw the dazed look in his eyes.

“Nova,” he begged, unseeing eyes darting around your face. “Nova.”

“I know,” you said, right before you dove back in and pressed open mouth kisses to his neck. And then, after all these years, you finally sunk your teeth into the meaty part of his neck. Right at the base of the skull tattoo. Eddie jerked, as if electrocuted, and shoved you back. Stumbling, you let him cradle your jaw, the other lowering you onto the couch.

Needing more, you whimpered and Eddie grinned. His knee pushed up between your legs and the pressure was amazing. Your hips stuttered, bumping into his and you both hissed. His teeth worried the sensitive skin of your neck and you whined as he lapped at the bruise he left.

“Eddie,” you gasped, “Eddie, please.”

His forehead came down to your shoulder, his chest heaving like he’d run a marathon, and you both just breathed the other in. At your nudging, he dropped his weight onto you and you jerked at the hardness you felt by your hip.

“Sorry,” he said, not sounding at all sorry. “The amount of adrenaline going through me right now-”

“It’s okay,” you assured him, hand drifting down his side but Eddie caught it. “I can help,” you offered. Jesus, you wanted to help if the pressure between your legs was any indication. Eddie’s face softened, his eyes drifting down your face and he groaned.

“I want that too but, maybe we should talk first? Before going past the no return point?”

You blinked. “Munson, I’m past the no return point,” you said, matter of fact. And it was true. There was no going back now.

His answering smile blinded you and you heart threatened to burst at the happiness you found there. “Yeah?” He asked, tone a little uneven.

You nodded, fingers trailing down his face. Eddie lifted himself off you, sitting on the couch and pulling you into his lap. “Yeah, me too.”

“When did you realize? And why didn’t you tell me?” You asked, ripping the band aid off.

“Because I was scared,” he admitted, “I...think I’ve always loved you. From that moment in the hallway when you chased away Tommy and his gang of assholes. You took one look at me and I think I was yours. I didn’t want to ruin what we had but there were times where I’d catch us in moments and I thought yeah, this could work. I wanted it so badly but I didn’t want to lose you. Then, years later, I realized you felt it too. I just, wanted you to get there on your own. I never wanted you to feel like you had no choice or no out. You’ll always have me, in any form you want me.”

Your heart melted. “You’re killing me,” you groaned, dropping your forehead to his shoulder.

Eddie laughed, his chest rumbling with it. “I’m sorry but, it’s the truth.”

“I know I’ve said it before but, I love you Eddie. How could I not?” You said, cradling his jaw in your hand.

Eddie pressed his lips to yours, eyes suspiciously red, and you decided to be mature enough and not tease him.

“Hey, you didn’t answer the first question. When did you really realize?”

“To be fair, it took me a while. Everyone knew I hated Mason,” he said and you thought back to your first boyfriend who’d moved to Texas your junior year, “which made the guys tease the shit out of me but I think I fully realized it for our senior prom. I was so bummed that you were going off to college and I was stuck in Hawkins. Then, you managed to blackmail Higgins into letting me go-”

“I didn’t blackmail him, I just asked,” you laughed.

“-I knew you knew I was upset and I could tell you wanted to cheer me up. But then you did that stupid promposal-”

“Hey!”

“And you had that big bouquet of daisies. And it hit me like a fucking truck, I’m not going to lie. That’s why – I don’t blame you. It was a lot,” he said, his fingers trailing down your cheek. “We’d been friends for years at that point. It was both shocking and stupidly obvious. How could I not have realized? It took you, standing in that meadow behind my old trailer, that massive glitter poster and those flowers. It was like…lightning. One moment I was totally oblivious and then the next, I just knew.”

“Is that why you never dated anyone after that? I thought you were hung up on Joan,” you said, thinking back on the girl he dated through high school.

He smiled, looking down at you. “No, I’ve always been yours. You’re branded on my soul, Supernova. From that first moment in that old gross hallway.”

“How did you know that I felt the same? I didn’t even know.”

Your heart sung, breath completely stolen at the look he gave you. “I mean, I didn’t know-” You leaned back to shoot him a look and he snorted. “There wasn’t an exact moment! After you went to Indie State and we’d hang out there were just small moments, I promise. Like, how you’d wait up for my call when I got home after visiting you. Or, how you stayed up all night to help me study for my finals – like two years in a row. Or that time that I caught the flu and you hit every pharmacy in Indiana getting me what I needed. Or the way Wayne just downright loves you – there’s no competition. You’re his favorite.”

“Because I bring him baked goods,” you said, laughing.

Eddie smiled. “Yeah, but he’s always loved you because you care. You just – you do all these little things and I didn’t notice until I did. I don’t know.”

You mulled that over and realized he was right. The way Eddie would steer you away from sharp corners, or always made sure you walked on the opposite side of the curb. How he always knew your order or how you liked you take your coffee. You flashed back to his broken body and how you’d snapped and lost it. How he’d only thought of making sure you were okay when he woke up.

In hindsight, you realized, he was right. It wasn’t one big moment. It was a lot of little ones.

“I’m sorry it took me so long to get there,” you whispered, thumb tracing his bottom lip, “I’m sorry for leaving you at the Wheeler’s house. I should’ve been braver.”

“You are brave,” he whispered back, “I knew you just needed time. Besides, I was going to give you a week before I hunted you down.”

Laughing, you wrapped your arm around his shoulder, the other played with his necklace. “Yeah?” You felt suddenly shy.

“Yeah. Even if I was wrong and you didn’t feel the same way,” he shrugged, “I wasn’t scared enough to let you go. Romantic or platonic, Nova, we’re for life. Between Vecna and surviving ninth grade gym class together, we’re practically trauma bonded at this point.”

You laughed realizing you’d already had a lifetime of experiences with him. Eyes trailing down his content expression, you kissed the corner of his mouth. But a lifetime wasn’t enough. You wanted more. And you’d have more – you had all the time in the world.

“Yeah, Munson, we’re for life,” you agreed and leaned back down to kiss him.

Because hey, even he was right sometimes.

A/N: thank you all so much for the comments on my other fic, you cannot imagine what it means to me! This is the cover I was thinking of if anyone's interested.

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson

[slut4thebroken]

The Recipe

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Pairing | Emmett x wife!reader

Summary | Emmett can’t keep his hands off you.

Warnings | Smut, praise, degradation, semi rough sex, breeding, cunnilingus, huuuge housewife kink, he’s very possessive but we love it

Words | 2k

Notes | Finally posting something 😭

Ao3 link | <3

Masterlist

More of these two

moodboard @liliesdiary

“That smells amazing, doll, what is it?” He walked over and gave you a quick kiss before finally setting down his bag, then taking off his jacket and hat. 

“I’m trying to recreate that one pasta dish we had when we went to that fancy place a few months ago cause I keep craving it.” You smiled, keeping your focus on the stove. He did his best to stay out of your way in the small kitchen as he walked past you to get to the fridge and grab a beer. 

“Fuck- and this dress.” He groaned. You heard a can open, then he was walking closer and smacking your ass. You had to bite your lip to control your sounds, not wanting to get distracted and mess up the meal when you were finally almost done making it. “I didn’t forget a date, did I?” He wrapped his arm around your stomach and nuzzled into your neck, teasingly kissing over it. 

“No.” You chuckled. “I got lunch with Evelyn earlier.” You could practically feel the pout on his lips against your neck. 

“You went out wearing this without me? All of the guys were probably all over you.” He grumbled. 

“Emmett, this town is tiny. Everyone knows we’re married.” 

“As if that’d stop them.” He scoffed, even though it seemed like he also knew he was being a little irrational. 

“Go wash up. I should be done in a few minutes.” He groaned and tightened his grip around you, beginning to kiss your neck more enthusiastically. “Emmett..” You warned, making him huff but step away to go do what you said. 

Once the table was set, you filled up two plates and set them down, then grabbed your own drink as Emmett walked back in. Dinner was mostly uneventful. He told you about work, you told him about the gossip that Evelyn shared with you. He told you about his latest idea for how to improve the house, you told him he had to finish his current project before starting a new one. 

“How was it?” You asked, taking both plates to the sink. 

“Amazing, doll. Tasted exactly like the  restaurant’s.” 

You scoffed a laugh, hearing him chuckle quietly. “You’re a shit liar.” 

“It was still good either way.” 

“Do you want to do the dishes or should I?” You and Emmmett had a system; either one person cooked and the other cleaned, or one person cooked and cleaned and the other did the same the next day.

“I think I’ll make that steak you got, so you go ahead.” He said, knowing that you didn’t know how to clean a grill. “Plus I want to watch you in that dress.” You could hear the smirk in his voice as he spoke. 

“I don’t know why I married such a pervert.” You scoffed teasingly as you put the plates and silverware in the dishwasher before starting to handwash the larger dishes. 

“I do.” He paused, walking right up behind you. “Cause you like it. You like that I can’t keep my hands off you.” He placed his hands on your hips, pulling you back so your ass was pressed firmly against the bulge in his jeans. 

“Emmett, let me finish the dishes, then we can move on to that.” You chuckled, still trying to wash everything. 

“I’m not stopping you.” He said simply. His hands dragged down the outsides of your thighs, then back up, pushing the fabric of your dress up to your waist. “Fuck…” He groaned, roughly groping the globes of your ass that were left bare because of your lace thong. You bit your lip and tried to stay focused, but it was getting increasingly more difficult. 

“Are you gonna be a good little wife and let me use you?” He smirked, quickly opening his jeans to remove his already half hard cock. 

“Emmett…” You said through a breath. You couldn’t tell if you were begging him to keep going or warning him to stop though.

“C’mon, baby. I deserve to fuck my girl after a long day of work.” You cursed under your breath and let your head drop down as you held onto the counter. “Do the dishes.” He chastised teasingly. He waited until you continued, then slid your panties to the side and lined up. 

Your knees buckled and your mouth dropped open in a silent moan when he finally pushed in. “Fuck,” You choked out. The stretch was a little uncomfortable, especially in this position, but you were mewling and pushing your hips back into his regardless. 

“Do the dishes.” He said firmly, placing a sharp smack on your ass. “I won’t tell you again.” You let out a low moan at the dominance in his voice. As soon as you continued washing, he was slowly dragging out and pushing back in. Your legs were already shaking and your breathing was already fast and uneven as you tried to cope with the overwhelming pleasure. 

“You make such a perfect little housewife.” He murmured, brushing your hair over one shoulder so he could start kissing the side of your neck. He left marks up and down, his grip tightening on your hips almost painfully. “Cook and clean for me… take my cock whenever I want… You'll even give me some kids when I ask, won’t you?” You sobbed out a moan and let your head fall back on his shoulder. He slapped the side of your thigh, making you whimper loudly at the sting. “Don’t make me tell you again.” He growled. 

With a whine, you lifted your head again and resumed washing. Honestly you were doing a shit job and you’d probably have to do it again once he was done with you. 

“So obedient.” He cooed, gently nipping at your neck. You knew he was just saying all of this for the sake of the scene— Emmett can be old fashioned, but he’s not that old fashioned. Regardless, the longer his cock stayed buried inside you, the more you didn’t mind being his housewife and cock sleeve. 

You almost dropped the pot into the sink when he suddenly sped up. But finally, you finished rinsing the last of the dishes and set it on the towel you laid out earlier. 

“Good girl.” Pulling you to a clear space on the counter, he pushed you down with a hand on the back of your neck and started wildly bucking into you. You almost screamed from the intensity, already feeling your legs turning to jelly, making it harder to hold yourself up. 

Desperately needing to come, you tried to push a hand down to rub your clit, but he twisted your arm behind your back and pinned it there. “If you want to touch my property, you fucking ask.” He growled, his voice only making you needier. 

“Please let me come, Emmett.” You whimpered. He lifted his hand from your neck and brought it down hard on your ass, making you cry out. Without giving any other response, he grabbed your hip as his thrusts grew even more frantic. You could tell he was getting close, especially with the way his sounds started getting louder, and you almost cried at the thought of not getting to come. But… the thought of being nothing more than a submissive housewife and a hole for your husband to use was hot enough that you almost didn’t care. 

You mewled and squirmed a little, making his grip on your body tighten even more. “Please.” You gasped out. His balls were just barely smacking your clit with each thrust, not giving you nearly enough stimulation. Both hands were on your hips now as he bucked into you at a brutal pace, chasing his orgasm. The slapping of skin and both of your moans echoed throughout the kitchen and if you were less horny, you probably would’ve been embarrassed by the faint squelching sound you could hear as your arousal continued to soak his cock. 

His hips stuttered and you whined when he suddenly slammed into you, pushing you into the counter almost painfully as he fell over the edge. Your legs were shaking with each pump of his hips as he lazily fucked his load deep inside your eager pussy. He was grunting and panting against your neck, holding your hips in a bruising grip until he rode out his orgasm completely. 

“Good girl.” He groaned breathily, making you whine again. Only after he caught his breath did he lean up and slowly drag his hips back, making the trembling of your legs even worse. He kicked your feet apart and grabbed your ass to pull you open so he could watch his come trickle out of your puffy folds. 

“Emmett.” You whimpered, but all he did was shush you quietly. Your hips flinched when he dragged his thumb through your slit and he cursed under his breath at the sight of you leaking his come. 

“Oh, look at that.” He cooed, making you blush. “This is how you should’ve gone out today; wearing this slutty little dress with my come dripping down your thighs to remind you who you belong to.” He gruffed. 

“Emmett, please.” You were on the verge of a tantrum now. 

“Shh… It’s okay.” He murmured quietly, standing back up. He pulled you up by your hair and spun you around, then captured your lips in a bruising kiss. “Is my good girl gonna let me have my dessert now?” You nodded dumbly, not really processing his words because you just hoped that agreeing to whatever he said would get him to finally give you some much needed relief. He smirked in amusement, then effortlessly lifted you up so your legs were around his hips, letting him carry you over to the table and gently set you down on it. 

Kneeling between your legs, he wasted no time diving in and sucking on your clit, making you cry out. Your hands settled in his hair and he alternated between lapping up your shared arousal and giving attention to your clit. When he draped your legs over his shoulders and then pulled you closer, you moaned loudly and laid down on the table, your back arching up from the pleasure. Emmett let out a low, gravelly moan against you, making you mewl and tug on his hair even harder. 

“Fuck— Please don’t stop..” You choked out. He devoured you like a man starved, quickly bringing you back to the edge with his enthusiasm. The loud slurping sounds that you could hear through your moans, had you blushing and whining in embarrassment. 

Your legs were trembling on either side of his head, the coil in your stomach was tightening, your moans were getting louder… and Emmett just held your hips down, continuing on, not deterred by any of your reactions. 

“Please let me come.” You whimpered, moaning loudly when he sucked on your clit repeatedly. His lack of a response only made you even more frustrated. Emmett was a little unpredictable about letting you come. Sometimes he didn’t care, but sometimes he could be really controlling over your orgasm, only letting you come after he gave you permission. Ever since the first time you came without permission, you’ve always been hesitant, not wanting to risk being punished. “Emmett, please!”  

He chuckled against you, making your hips jerk against his mouth. “Come.” He mumbled, not bothering to pause or pull away so he could talk. When you finally got his permission, you let the pleasure wash over you, no longer trying to suppress it. The knot of arousal in your stomach snapped suddenly and you sobbed out a moan as your back arched off the table. You had a death grip on Emmett’s hair and your hips were practically grinding on his face, but he worked you through it, not stopping until you were twitching and whining from overstimulation. 

“Good girl.” He groaned, placing one last kiss on your clit. “C’mere, doll.” He helped pull you up into a seated position, then kissed you again, much softer this time. You moaned at the taste of yourself still on his tongue. “Fuck, I love you.” He muttered into the kiss, making you blush a little. “But the next time you go out wearing this dress without my come dripping down your thighs, you won’t be coming for a week.” 

Guys pls give me ideas for a different title lol

#emmett a quiet place #emmett x you #emmett x reader smut #emmett x reader #emmett smut #Emmett x wife!reader

[foldingfittedsheets]

I’ve never had a particularly strong desire to get high. Altered mind states have always been somewhat unappealing to me. The only drug I’ve ever enjoyed taking was a prescription strength muscle relaxant that loosened all my knots at once and sent me into the boneless slumber of jello. Top marks.

But I have dabbled with pot. As I’m wildly sensitive to smoke my only recourse was to try edibles and anyone could’ve predicted this was a recipe for disaster. So here’s the story of the first time I got high.

Connor was a major stoner. He was a high energy guy who loved hiking, had his shit together, and absolutely loved getting high and relaxing. One day he decided to make pot brownies. Connor was an amazing cook in his own right but he came into my life at a time when I was eating mayonnaise sandwiches and started giving me real food so I viewed him as a paragon of cookery. He made amazing desserts. And he didn’t make a batch of no pot brownies.

I’d never had one of Connor’s brownies, before, but dear god I wanted one when they came out of the oven in a waft of rich chocolatey smells. They were fudgey and perfect and all that I wanted in the world was to eat one. I watched him take a bite, burning with envy and desire.

Being high seemed like a small price to pay if only I could sink my teeth into the warm splendor of brownie. I came up to where he was sitting on the couch, slightly behind his left shoulder. “Hey. I want to try a bite,” I told him.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes!” I was sure as fuck that I wanted that brownie in my mouth.

Connor was sat facing the tv and held up his hand without looking so I could take a bite. I am not a creature of modest bites. And I wanted that brownie. I took a huge bite, carving into the interior of the brownie, leaving Connor with a only a rim.

He pulled his hand back and saw the brownie crime I had committed and gave a resigned chuckle. “Well this is going to be fun.”

On one other occasion in my life I’ve tried an edible and there was a brief relaxed period before things went horribly wrong that made me think, this is probably where most people stop and enjoy themselves.

But on this occasion, the massive bite of brownie didn’t drift me slowly up through layers of being high. It skyrocketed me into high space with great prejudice. I have no memory of a middle point, I wasn’t high and then I was suddenly so high I couldn’t function.

I’ve heard people talk about paranoia. I didn’t have that. Some people mention nervousness, no, none of that for me. My mind was simply gone. A thought would blip to life on one side of my brain and fail to travel through the fog to find its conclusion. I couldn’t think. I wasn’t really experiencing sensation. I was nothing in the void.

When Connor realized I’d been staring wall eyed at nothing for too long he said, “How are you doing?”

It took a long time to process the words and even longer to slur out, “I can see everything.”

I don’t remember him getting up and leaving, or waiting, or anything really. Thoughts flickered and died in my mindscape, meaningless and alone.

Then Connor put headphones on me.

I was unable to conceive of anything as wonderful as music surrounding me, and thus began the only nice part of the trip. I might have experienced ego death but at least I had the ethereal sounds of Pure Reason Revolution to wrap myself in.

I’m not sure how long the nice phase lasted. But eventually something started going wrong in my mouth. My throat became uncomfortable enough to pierce the haze I was in. It was almost numb, and impossibly dry. I drank water to no avail. Finally I conceived of the solution. “Ice cream!” I demanded of Connor.

He went to grab some and I was dismayed that when I took a bite the sensation in my throat intensified. “It made it worse,” I complained.

“Made what worse?” Connor asked, because of course I hadn’t actually told him why I’d wanted ice cream.

When I told him what was happening he said, “Oh, of course ice cream is going to make cotton mouth worse.”

“Well then why did you give it to me!” I complained. He smiled fondly at my irrational grumping and got me more water.

Finally I’d had enough. Music couldn’t erase my discomfort, I was getting frustrated I couldn’t think but I was still high as balls and I wanted the night to be over. Connor suggested I go to bed so I climbed up into my bed and lay there, uncomfortably high.

I couldn’t sleep. My throat was so cottony, a side effect I hadn’t known existed and I thoroughly loathed.

Then I thought: I could masturbate! Connor had talked about enjoying that while high. I’d give it a shot. My body however was wiser than my head and was having none of this plan. It refused to respond, stubbornly insisting that now was not the time.

I doubled down, refusing to give up on this horrible idea and in a bitter struggle, and against my body’s own wishes, I produced an orgasm that rated a 0 on the pleasure scale. Something happened but it was like a resentful flex of muscles that stopped immediately.

Furious with the overall experience of being high I buried my head in pillows and finally slept. I told Connor the next day about my attempt and he facepalmed so hard. “Why didn’t you just go to sleep! You were way too high to enjoy that.”

I grumbled and agreed that it was very stupid. I tried to weigh the single bite of brownie I had with the absolutely wretched hours of discomfort and while it didn’t quite balance it was still pretty close. It was a really good brownie.

#ramblies #funny #writing #ffs foibles #marijuana #it’s silly now that it’s legal in my state there’s so many ways I could try it now #but I have less than no desire to make another foray #funny story

[onleurafaitcroire]

thinking about carmy + picky eater gf a/n: i wrote this stoned bc i hate fish and i also did not edit it plz enjoy <3

he'd try to surprise her one night early on in dating by making some fancy kingfish thing on a night they're supposed to just hang out at his place, and when she walks into his apartment, she is immediately appalled by the smell of the cooking fish. she's a sweetie though so she's going to try, just for carmy, because he's sweating and the kitchen is kind of an organized mess so she knows he must have gone to a lot of trouble.

he greets her with a kiss and goes to change, leaving her to freak out about how the fuck she's supposed to fake liking seafood of all fucking things.

once carmy's plated everything and brought it out, he looks so proud of himself and so hopeful that her tentative plans to tell him she really, really cannot do seafood crash and burn in front of her, and she decides that she's just gonna have to suck it up and eat the fish. she puts a bite in her mouth, chews, swallows, and immediately gulps down a bunch of her wine to get the taste out of her mouth. of course carmy notices - he's been staring at her, actually, so eager to know if she likes his cooking - and his face immediately falls.

"you hate it." it's a statement, not a question.

her eyes widen. "no, what? no! no, it's so good, the sauce - it's delicious, carm, for real," and they're both mildly frantic now. she's taking another huge bite that makes her eyes water from how much she does not like the taste of the fish, and carmy is leaning back in his chair, looking sort of...despondent. yeah, that's the word.

"is it...i mean, seriously, you don't have to pretend to like it. if it sucks it sucks. i knew i should've done a glaze instead of the cream sauce..." now carmy's muttering to himself about the recipe, taking his own bite and frowning. "i mean, it's not that bad, is it?"

"carm, it's not bad at all, i promise, i just - i guess i never told you that i don't really...like seafood," she says, standing up to walk around the table and stand next to him, cupping his face in her palms. "the sauce is so good and i'm sure the fish is cooked perfectly, i just...i really...i hate seafood, carmen, i'm sorry, i should've told you, but i just didn't know you'd go to all this trouble, i thought it was going to be kind of a chill night and i'm just really sorry." she knows she's rambling but she can hardly get herself to stop.

carmy swings his chair forward, the front legs hitting the hardwood with a thump. "you don't like seafood? like any seafood?"

she shakes her head. "i'm sorry."

there's a pause where she thinks he might yell. then he tips his head back, out of her grip, and belly laughs. he laughs for a solid minute or two, hysterical laughter that starts to worry her after the fifteen second mark. "carm, i'm sorry, i'll make it up to you, i'll pay you back for the fish and stuff -"

that stops him cold. "okay, no," he scoffs. "i'm gonna make you some pastina or some other shit you'll actually eat and we're gonna watch the new episode of bach you kept texting me about and we're gonna have a nice night, okay? pay me back for the fish," he mutters the end under his breath, "as fuckin' if."

#carmen berzatto #jeremy allen white #carmen berzatto x reader #carmy x reader #the bear #the bear fx #the bear hulu #my writing #excuse my complete lack of knowledge about cooking i don't even know if kingfish is good or expensive #also yes carmy refers to the bachelor as bach in this universe because he's actually very invested in joey's journey this season

[lovewithmary]

Listen, and hear me out on this request, have you considered writing one where Max wants to cook for reader, to try and be a good romantic boyfriend, except he's shit at cooking, so he calls up Lando, minor minor minooor issue Lando has been buying takeout and taking credit for the food for years, he's even worse in a kitchen than Max is. But Max doesn't know that

reader finally comes home, and who doesn't love seeing a firetruck pulled up outside of your apartment complex because your boyfriend and his friend can't cook

hope you find this as funny as i do, have a good weekend :)

COOKING DISASTER — MV1

summary: In an effort to try and be a good boyfriend to you, Max tries to cook up a romantic meal for the two of you. Except, he's shit at cooking. So, he enlists the help of Lando, who has been bragging and posting about his cooking on his Close Friends Stories for a year now. There's just one problem: it's all fake. And what do you get when you have Max and Lando trying to cook? A visit from the firefighters to your house, of course.

masterlist

warnings: use of you

notes: first request WOOO. this request was so fun to write, so thank you for requesting! I tried to make it funny so I hope it's funny?? idk

"Lando, you have to do it. You agreed to help me cook,"

"But it's fish. I hate fish," he replied, pointing at the fish as if Max didn't know there was a fish in his own kitchen.

"Y/N's favorite dish has fish in it," Max told Lando, already sounding as if he was exhausted with cooking even if they hadn't even started yet.

"And you're still dating her?" Lando questioned, and Max had to resist punching him.

"Lando."

"Alright, I'll help cook the fish but I hope you know I don't like it," he informed Max.

"Really? I didn't even notice," Max said sarcastically.

Max then decides he is going to take charge of dealing with the fish since Lando's one step closer to walking out if he's the one who does it. As he is looking through the recipe on his phone, he notices that Lando is in front of the vegetables.

He was only staring at them, holding a knife in one hand and his phone in the other but nothing was happening. "Lando, I sent you the recipe," Max told him.

"I know, but you should cut the onion," Lando said, trying to hand Max the knife.

"Okay, but you have to cut the fish then—"

"Never mind, I'll cut the onion," Lando said, taking back the knife.

Max watched as Lando continued to do nothing, switching between looking at him, the onion, the knife, and his phone in his hand. Suddenly, he put the knife down and looked at Max.

"I have to tell you something, but you cannot tell anyone, including your own girlfriend," Lando said, emphasizing how serious it is by making Max swear not to tell you.

"What is it?" Max asked, skeptical.

“You don’t know how to cook?!” Max exclaimed.

“This is all your fault!” Lando shot back.

“How was I supposed to know you don’t know how to cook?!”

“Why did you even ask me? Do you not know other people who might know how to cook? You could’ve asked Yuki!”

That stumped Max. If he was being honest, he didn’t even think about who to ask to help him cook for you, considering he was panicking and called whoever he called the most recent, which just so happened to be Lando. And he figured that the McLaren helper could give him a hand considering Lando had been posting what he had been cooking on his Instagram close friend's story for a little over a year now.

Only for Lando to admit that the whole thing was fake, everything was takeout put onto a plate, and he was fooling everyone with his story. Including Max. “Why did you even say yes when I asked you to help me if you knew you didn’t know how to cook?” Max questioned, clueless as to why Lando still came over.

"It all happened so fast, Max. I posted a picture on my story of my takeout that was just put on a plate and everyone was responding to it, saying it looked good. And then it kept on happening and next thing you know, I was considered good at cooking! I thought I was going to avoid, you know, actually cooking but then you asked me to help you cook dinner for Y/N, and if I said no, you'd get suspicious—" Lando started to rant.

"Lando," Max interrupted Lando, immediately quieting the McLaren driver. 

"I'll keep your secret, no matter how weird I think it is. Just, help me cook, and don't burn down the kitchen,"

"I can do that," Lando said

Lando burnt the kitchen down. 

Well, nearly burnt the kitchen down because apparently, he didn't know you aren’t supposed to put tin foil in the microwave and he didn't know what was happening in the microwave until Max saw it and yelled. Once Lando finally saw the fire, instead of trying to do something, he ran out of the kitchen and left Max to deal with it instead.

“I could’ve died,” Max told Lando.

“You’re overreacting. It was just the microwave,” Lando said.

“I was overreacting? You didn’t even know what was happening and just ran out without even helping,” Max said.

“What the fuck was I supposed to do?”

“Call the firefighters!”

“Well, they’re here, aren’t they?!”

“BECAUSE OF ME!”

Before either one of them could bicker anymore, you rushed towards them, wearing your work clothes. “Max? Why are there firefighters— Lando? Why are you here? Were you and Max hanging out when the fire happened? Are you guys okay?” You asked, checking both of them for any injuries.

“Schat, we’re fine. We were cooking when the fire happened,” Max said, gently prying your hands away from his face and holding your hands in his own.

“Cooking? But neither of you cooks,” You pointed out, confused.

“Of course, I cook! I post whenever I cook,” Lando tried saying.

“Post? Oh, you mean when you post on your story about your take-out food on a plate?” You said, unaware of how Max was laughing and Lando looking like a kicked puppy.

“You know it’s take-out?” Lando asked.

“Lan, you can see the logo of the restaurants in some of the pictures,” You tried saying carefully, now aware of how sad Lando was.

Spotting the firefighters from afar, who were waiting for one of you to talk to them, you turned to Max and Lando, who went back to bickering about something. “How about I cook something? Lando, you can join us if you want,” you offered, but before Lando could answer, you went to talk to the firefighters.

“You can’t eat with us,” Max immediately said.

“Why not? She just said—”

“I don’t care. Tell her you’re busy or something,”

“But I like her cooking,”

“She’s my girlfriend!”

“Why can’t you be the one to tell her that you don’t want me to eat dinner with you guys?”

“And get scolded about how we should spend time with our friends? No thanks,”

“Well, I guess I’m eating with you guys,” Lando said, smug.

Max glared at him and said, “I shouldn’t have said anything and just left the kitchen,”

#f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 x y/n #f1 x you #f1 fanfic #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen fic

[oepionie]

—"🍳KITCHEN BLUES"various

💭masterlist | 💬ao3 link

sypnosis: you wouldn't really call yourself a chef. at most, your culinary abilities were barely above average. even so, when your boyfriend becomes overworked, you take your chances and cook something up for him. here's to hoping you don't burn down the entire dorm!

⊹ [ cw ] — slight mentions of injuries, ramshackle's oven is set on fire◞

⊹ [ tags ] — FLUFF.GN! READER | protective jade, lighthearted mentions of marriage in ruggie's part, leona's back muscles whsg, jamil calls you قلبي 'Albi' (My Heart)◞

⊹ [ character/s ] — trey, leona, ruggie, jade, & jamil

⊹ [ w.c ] — 1.5k+◞

You stare blankly at the ingredients set out before you. The words on the recipe you printed seemed to blur together. Rice noodles, honey, smoked paprika, roasted almonds—you had your job cut out for you, huh?

You turn to face your partner who was dozing off on the rickety couch at Ramshackle, a thin blanket haphazardly thrown atop his body. He looked to be in deep sleep, not minding the worn-out scratchy leather texture of the couch one bit.

Tensed shoulders and fatigue laced his muscles; both evidence of the strain he's been putting on himself as of late. With an ache in your heart, you return your focus to the sizzling pan. Making him lunch was the least you could do to help.

Halfway through preparing the bento, you heard the old couch creak. Your boyfriend finally wakes, he calls for you with bleary eyes and a hoarse voice.

"Prefect?"

✩— TREY CLOVER:

"Oh, you're awake?" You rush over to him, dropping the lunch box onto the counter. Concern laced your features as you pressed a palm against his flushed forehead. Trey sat up, the blanket slipping off his torso and pooling around his hips.

"Mhm. Is something wrong?" Trey chuckled, resting his forehead on your shoulder.

"Yeah. This fever of yours is worrying me." You grumbled as you reached for his glasses on the adjoining coffee table. You slipped it onto him and gave him a quick kiss on the nose.

"The unbirthday party is coming up, and you know I have to work extra hard." Trey sighed, rolling his stiff shoulders. Nodding, you silently slipped back into the kitchen to retrieve the bento box. Once you returned, you handed it over to him.

"I know, but I hope you still take the time to rest every now and again." Trey tucked the box under his arm and drew you into a hug. You melted into his embrace, savouring the warmth you'd been missing these past few weeks. He's been so busy that the only affection you've received from him was the ocassional peck on the cheek.

Ten seconds into your little respite from the world, Trey pushed you away with a hand on your shoulder. He sniffed the air, brows pinched.

"Is something on fire?"

"Sevens-! The tarts!"

You clutch a plate of charred black tarts in your hands, head bowed down in shame. Trey chuckled and took a piece of the inedible lump, turning it around in his hand.

"This reminds me of Lillia's cooking."

"You're not helping!"

✩— LEONA KINGSCHOLAR:

Leona sat on the couch, tail swishing lazily in the air while he watched you work around the kitchen. His emerald gaze swept over your apron-clad body, noticing the honey smeared on your cheek.

Once you finished, you walked over to him with the meal on a tray.

"How was the spelldrive training with the freshmen?" You asked, taking a seat on the floor beside him. He raised his arm to use his elbow to remove the honey off your cheek.

"It was shit." Growling, Leona pushed himself off the couch. He stretched his arms, groaning as his muscles ached from the burn. He was turned away from you, giving you full view of his back muscles straining against the fabric of the tight black shirt he had on; you averted your eyes, suddenly feeling very warm.

"See anything you like?" He grinned and flexed his arms. You squeaked and jumped back, embarrassment written all over your face. "Leona!"

He chuckled as he pulled you off the floor and onto the couch next to him.

"A-Anyways…Epel told me you stormed out in the middle of the game?" You stammered, avoiding his gaze and changing the subject. You scooped some food from the containter and fed it to him. Leona took the spoon in his mouth, chewing it throughly.

"Damn right. None of those idiots could fly straight if their life depended on it." Leona scoffed. You lifted the tray up so he could slip his head onto your lap, face tucked into your stomach.

"I see. I guess they couldn't keep up with you, huh?" You mused, running your hands through his hair whilst feeding him a bite of food.

The flavours and spices melted across his mouth, each ingredient flawlessly blending together. Leona relaxed against your form, satisfied, your food and pampering making him feel like a king.

"Who can?"

✩— RUGGIE BUCCHI:

"Is that food?" Ruggie piped up, wrapping himself in the thin blanket. He was shaped like a taco roll, with only his head sticking out from under the cover. You chuckled and nodded, taking the food you prepared into your arms.

As you brought out a platter of doughnuts along with the bento box, his tail began to wag. You approached him carefully, taking care not to drop the stacks of chocolate doughnuts. Unbeknownst to you, Ruggie was debating whether or not to marry you on the spot.

"Of course. You just looked so exhausted yesterday, I wanted to help." You said, frowning and tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. Ruggie gulped, his cheeks flushing at your sweet gesture.

"What did I say about slowing down every now and then?" You grumbled, frowning at him.

"W-Well, I kinda lost track yesterday; I swear I won't do it again," Ruggie replied sheepishly, folding his arms behind his head. In truth, you were kinda right. His limbs were killing him with how sore they were right now.

"You better! I can't keep scolding you about this again and again!" You shook your head and sighed. After giving him the platter of doughnuts, you began slipping off the apron you were wearing.

"Shishishi. You sound like a worried spouse." Ruggie snickered, shoving two doughnuts into his mouth. You dropped the apron in your hand, eyes wide at the implications of what Ruggie just said. Snorting at your flustered state, he continued teasing you.

"Spare me! I'm sure you'll have plenty of time in the future to scold me." Ruggie's voice suddenly lowered to a whisper, the playful edge to it gone. "I should prolly start putting off money up for a ring now…"

"Wh-What?!"

✩— JADE LEECH:

"What might this be?" Jade appeared behind you, his towering form pressing itself against your back. An arm wrapped around you, pulling you snug against him. His hair remained dishevelled and out of place, his physique still sluggish and lethargic. Jade, contrary to popular belief, was not a morning person.

"It's just a simple little bento I'm preparing…Azul told me you skipped out on dinner last night so I um-" Feeling flushed under his intense yet drowsy gaze, you struggled to finish your sentence. "…decided to cook something up for you."

Jade hums, grasping your hands in his own. He instantly pauses as he feels the texture of scratchy woven fabric beneath his skin. The eel looked down to see your hands covered with sloppily placed bandages and bandaids.

He stared down at your damaged hands for a minute, an unsettling smile creeping up his face.

"Who did this." Jade stated firmly, a dark, pointed expression on his face. His fingers rubbed soothing circles over your palm, patiently waiting for your response. "I need names, my pearl."

You fiddled with one of the bandages wrapped around your finger.

"No one did this. I'm just not really the best person to put near a kitchen knife or a pan with boiling oil." You laughed sheepishly, cheeks heating up in embarrassment. Jade chuckled alongside you. All previous apprehension from him seemed to fade away.

"I see. I appreciate the gesture however I wish you were more careful." Jade leaned down next to your ear, his voice dropping to a low whisper.

"Allow me to take care of you first, these bandages are in dire need of a change."

✩— JAMIL VIPER:

"Albi?" Jamil groaned, raising his arms to shield his eyes from the glaring sun. He sat up and instantly regretted his decision when his head started spinning; he could already feel the start of a migraine. You rushed over and shushed him, pushing him to sit back down on the couch.

"Are you okay?" Frowning, you plopped the box open and scooped up some food for him to eat. Jamil leaned forward to take it into his mouth, humming at the taste.

Yesterday's events began to resurface in his mind. He was given a potionology assignment to complete alongside Kalim.

Everything was going smoothly until Kalim made the decision to add some sugar to the cauldron for unknown reasons. The cauldron exploded and Jamil ended up getting hit with the fumes, breathing it in. Which was probably the reason why his head felt like it was being split open.

"A bit. If my memory serves me well, the effects of this potion should wear off in a few hours." He mumbled, allowing himself to get fed by and spoiled by you. You smiled and reached for a napkin to wipe down the corners of his lips. "That's good. Is the food to your liking?"

"It tastes great." Jamil compliments, taking the box into his own hands. "Thank you for looking after me; is there anything you want me to make for you?"

"That curry you gave me the other day! It tasted so good!"

"Of course." Jamil smiled at you. Regardless of the numerous hijinks he has to deal with as Kalim's retainer and Scarabia's vice dorm leader, you've always been an anchor of support for him; holding him firm when everything appears to be sweeping him away.

A/N: This was a request! Likes and Reblogs are greatly appreciated and really motivating on my end!

#jade leech #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #disney twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland fanfic #twisted wonderland jamil viper x reader #twisted wonderland jade leech x reader #twst jade leech x reader #jade leech x reader #jamil viper x reader #leona kingscholar x reader #trey clover x reader #trey clover #leona kingscholar #jamil viper #ruggie bucci x reader #ruggie bucchi #ruggie bucchi x reader #ruggie bucci

[crushmeeren]

Bakugou/Female Reader/Todoroki

Everyone involved in this is 18+/aged up — if that bothers you then scroll on or block me.

Warnings; Female Anatomy/Pronouns, Vaginal Sex, Anal Sex (double penetration), Pussy Eating, Blow Jobs, Squirting, reader gets cream pied in the end, Angst/Comfort, Cursing

Note; This is my first time writing for this pairing and I’ve wanted to for so long so I hope you all enjoy the brain food! 💜💜

AO3 Link; Miscommunications💥🍰

Word Count; 10.1k

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It’s normal when you and Katsuki argue. It’s normal when Shouto and Katsuki argue. What isn’t normal, is when you and Shouto argue. You absolutely fucking hate it when you do. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does it always leaves you with a lump in your throat and the feeling of icy fingers twisting your belly with unease. Yet, this past week or so, despite you trying your hardest to avoid having a fight with Shouto, you can’t help but burn with agitation towards the hero.

He’s told you and Katsuki, three times this week mind you, that he was going to be home from work in time to eat dinner before it was too late. Each time he’s shown up late enough that Katsuki just ended up putting a plate in the fridge for him while you two went to bed. He’s missed each night this week and the last, that the three of you are able to have a meal together. Sometimes you wake up to him crawling into the bed hours after you and Katsuki have fallen asleep. You wonder if Shouto feels a pang of sadness when he slips into the bed and notices you and Katsuki curled up together, naked, realizing he’s also missed the rare opportunity when the three of you have enough energy to have sex together. The petty part of you hopes he does.

It’s not like the three of you don’t understand that hero work has never been a job where you’re able to really get home at a scheduled time. You all understand that shit happens. It happens to Katsuki often. It happens to you as well. However lately, Shouto doesn’t even make an effort to keep his fucking phone charged! So you end up leaving irritated voicemails, not letting Katsuki do it because then it’ll really be a fight.

“Pick up the fucking phone, Shouto,” you bite, once again speaking to his damn voicemail. You’re sitting on one of the bar stools at the island in your open kitchen. The leather like material sticking to the bottoms of your thighs and it pisses you off even more. You shift your thighs to unstick them and set your phone down, screen side landing harshly onto the granite counter top. Fuck, you hope the screen didn’t crack. You pick it up gingerly and look at the screen. It doesn’t seem any more scratched than it was before.

You set it down again and lift your hands up to rub them over eyes in irritation. Truthfully you’re starting to feel really really upset at this point. Katsuki tells you not to worry about it, Shouto has always been this much of an airhead. Not to bad mouth him, but you know it’s true. He’s so smart in terms of hero work, but can be so fucking thick when it comes to relationships. You let out a drawn out sigh and try to ignore the hurt that keeps twisting your belly.

“Strawberry shortcake not answer his phone again?” Katsuki asks, voice colored with irritation. Your gaze flickers to one of your boyfriends, roaming the well defined muscles in his shoulders and back. If you weren’t so upset you’d take more time to appreciate his lean body in the moment. He’s wearing a black tank top, black sweats, and he looks as pretty as he always does. Katsuki’s standing at your stove.

You track the movements of his arm as it flexes slightly when he moves the wooden spoon around the pan, stirring the rice. He’s busy cooking a new recipe of fried rice he’s been dying to make for all three of you. It smells so fucking good and you feel second hand hurt in your chest for Katsuki. He was so excited to cook this for you and Sho tonight. You know he wont really show that his feelings are hurt though. Your lips tug into a frown at the thought and you drum your fingers on the counter top.

“No, fucking of course he didn’t,” you mumble, sounding defeated and feeling your eyes start to sting with tears. You really fucking miss him. The way Shouto’s been acting the past couple weeks has really been weighing heavily on your mind and your heart. You’ve started to question whether or not he really wants to be with you and Katsuki. If he still loves you. If he did, why would he miss out on the precious chances the three of you rarely get to spend a night in together?

Of course you’re probably being dramatic, but you can’t help it. The thought makes your chest ache, like someone shoved a fist through your solar plexus. Your body flushes hotly as you get even more worked up, heart beat picking up. It makes you feel like you can’t eat the delicious food Kat has made and you swallow around the lump in your throat, sniffling a little as you feel your eyes well up with tears.

Katsuki is either a mind reader or he heard the little sniffle you did. You actually wouldn’t be surprised if he could somehow read minds. His own belly swirls with anger realizing you’re about to cry. He pauses his movements when you both hear his hands start to crackle, he’s fucking pissed off at Shouto. He turns the heat of the stove off and he moves the pan over to a safe spot on the counter so it won’t burn. Katsuki turns around swiftly to get a look at your sad little face. Your cheeks red, eyes shiny, and you won’t make eye contact with him. He scowls, eye brows scrunching as he makes his way around the counter to stand next to you.

“Look at me, idiot,” he rumbles, crossing his arms in front of his chest. You still refuse to turn your chair, not wanting him to see the expression on your face. He lets out a frustrated sound and grips the back of your chair, physically swiveling your seat so your body is facing him. He steps in between your thighs and you tilt your head downwards, chin resting on your chest. You cross your arms and sniffle again. Katsuki sighs and reaches a hand out to grip your chin.

You feel the way his calloused fingers wrap around the shape of your chin, pressing gently into the muscle as he guides your head up to look at him. You notice his fingers are slightly damp as your eyes flit back and forth when you stare into his pretty scarlet eyes. He glances down and sees the tears that have started to flow quickly down your cheeks and his sharp expression softens a little bit. He lets go of your chin.

“I’m just frustrated. Why doesn’t he want to spend time with us Kat? I don’t understand what’s going through Shos head,” you say in a watery voice, lower lip trembling. You quickly use your hands to wipe away your tears. Katsuki wraps his arms around your neck, bringing you close to bury your face in his chest. The warmth of his chest bleeds through his tank top on to your cheeks and it feels so comforting, warming the parts of your heart that had started to feel cold. You frantically snake your hands around his waist, hugging him tightly, yearning for his affection. He happily gives it to you.

“You know Shoutos head is 90% filled with hot air sweetheart. He’s not doing this on purpose, he loves both of us and he’s just been really busy lately. You know how his asshat of a dad is, pushing Sho past his limits. Trust me, things will be okay,” he says lowly, voice soothingly deep. As much as Shouto is pissing him off, he knows the dumbass isn’t doing this voluntarily. Endeavor is still an asshole. Katsuki rubs his cheek on the top of your head, feeling your soft hair tickle his skin, before placing a soft kiss near your hairline. He starts to run a hand up and down your upper back comfortingly.

“It just hurts Kat,” you say, voice cracking as your shoulders start to jolt with sobs, shaking in his hold. You don’t have any control of the frustration and and hurt spilling out of you and onto Katsuki. He shoulders it, being the strong hero for you that he always is. He holds you tight and lets you cry. The weight of it is a lot, you’ve been letting it build up for the last two weeks and you haven’t cried this hard in a long time. He squeezes you even tighter, noticing his tank become soaked with tears, it cools against his skin. He feels your exhales and lets out a soft growl of anger under his breath.

“I’m gonna kick his ass,” he says, voice sounding rough. You grip the soft material on Katsukis back and fist it with your fingers. You continue to cry for a few minutes, feeling the wet fabric rubbing against your cheeks, heart hammering and stomach clenching painfully as you get pummeled with sobs. You really do try not to get snot on his shirt. He hugs you, not complaining once, continuing to rub your back gently.

You start to feel like you’re getting lightheaded from breathing so heavily and you lean your head back to try and take deep breaths of air to calm down, hiccups pushing through every so often. Katsuki lets his grip loosen and you lean back further, dropping your hands from his back and letting them fall into your lap. He brings his hands up to run his thumbs under your eyes, wiping away stray liquid.

“Feel any better sweetheart?” he asks gently, well as gentle as his voice can be. You sniff and nod once, grabbing his hand and tugging on it, wanting to pull him forward. He goes easily, leaning down into your space, he places a hand on the counter top and the other on the top of your thigh. His fingers dig into the skin there. You tilt your head upwards, eyes feeling puffy, but your belly flutters pleasurably with warmth as Katsukis lips brush softly across yours. Both of you have let your eyes squeeze shut. You press further, firmly sealing your lips with his. He feels so soft and so warm and you feel him let out a small moan as your lips start to roll together slowly and sensually. You swallow his noises eagerly.

The kiss feels sweet, intimate, and extremely comforting as you take his affection and let it fill you up. You smooth your hands up his chest and let them rest near his collarbone. As your thumbs run over the straps of his tank top you both tilt your heads, moving yours from right to left and his the opposite as you kiss slowly, feeling his tongue swipe across your bottom lip. You whimper softly and open your mouth on the next meeting of your lips. You feel his tongue slip inside of your mouth, running against yours and licking the soft pallet on the roof of your mouth. Tingles shoot down your spine and you gasp softly, breaking away from the kiss with a wet noise. Katsuki feels his dick throb.

The two of you rest your foreheads together, chests rising and falling quickly as you catch your breath.

“Kat, I’m sorry, I don’t think I can eat anything. I just wanna go to bed,” you say, trying to will away the sting behind your eyes that you’re starting to feel again. You move your hands up to frame his face with your hands. Katsuki moves back from the embrace and you let your hands fall from his face as you chew your bottom lip. You take in his sharp features and see his cheeks are pink, his expression remaining neutral. His eyes remain the same as always though, full of love for you.

“Let me take you to bed then little love,” he purrs. You smile softly at his sweet words and your eyes widen when he leans down quickly and slips his hands under your thighs, grabbing firmly and lifting you up. You let out a sound of surprise and cling to him. Your legs wrapped around his waist and your arms hugging his neck. He walks the two of you to your bedroom and he drops you down on the bed, near the edge, letting you bounce a couple times. You move back till you’re able to lay your head on a pillow and reach your arms out for him.

“Come here Katsuki,” you whisper, waiting patiently as you see his mouth pull into a smirk. The air heats up between the two of you, not a blaze, but a low, warm smolder as he strips his tank top off. Like a fire where the wood only glows orange and red, nothing but embers left. You watch him crawl towards you on the bed, you let him strip the both of you bare. He pulls the covers over the two of you in the mostly dark room. You let him slip inside of your pussy easily. He moves sweet and slow, making love to you as the two of you are wrapped up together. You let him fill you with comfort and love, falling asleep quickly afterwards.

Later on Katsuki ventures back to the kitchen to put away the rice, contemplating what he’s going to tell the red and white dumbass when he gets home. Katsuki sits at their kitchen bar top for an hour or so, falling asleep with his chin in his hand, head snapping back up as he jolts awake.

He rubs his eyes sleepily and taps his phone to see the time. He realizes it’s getting close to midnight and he grips the counter so hard he swears it cracks. His hot temper flares and he grinds his teeth together, moving his hand away from the counter, not wanting it to explode. Katsuki leaves a very angry and colorful note for Shouto in the kitchen and goes to bed. He slips under the covers, pulling you close and relaxing slightly when you snuggle into his chest.

It must be close to 1 am when you feel a cool arm wrap around your belly, rousing you slightly from your sleep. You had been sleeping on your left side, facing Katsuki, with your right leg tucked up a little bit. Your left arm was under your pillow when Shoutos arm tugs you into his solid chest. Shoutos soft nose tickling the back of your neck. Usually you’d turn around once you feel him slip in the bed, nuzzling noses with him and trading, soft, slow kisses in greeting. You’re still more than half asleep but you still feel unsettled, hurt and you don’t turn around. You let him curl up behind you.

It’s become a habit, something the three of you do every time one of you comes home late and the other two are fast asleep. You know Shouto is waiting for it and you can tell he realizes something his wrong. You feel the arm wrapped around you squeeze a little bit tighter and can physically feel his arm get cooler in response to his emotions.

He knows you’re partially awake when you pull the blanket up and cover both of your shoulders, making sure the blanket is also tugged up on Katsuki, covering his chest seeing as he’s laying on his back. He hasn’t woken up once, he’s a heavy sleeper when he wants to be. You reach out a hand to rest it on Katsukis belly, feeling his warm skin. Katsuki unconsciously brings his own hand up to tangle your fingers together. You drift off again, feeling a bit heartbroken. The dreams you have that night are more nightmares than anything.

—————————————————————

You don’t speak to Shouto for almost two days. He tries to talk to you, he really does. He actually keeps his cell phone charged and tries to text you and call you throughout the day. He sends you cat memes and love notes but you ignore them, not in the mood to deal with it right now. The first morning you force yourself to wake up before Shouto does, heading to your hero agency early. You don’t come back till late into the night. Exhausted, bruised and skin overly hot from the use of your quirk, you tumble into your home. You know Shouto knows you’re upset because you’ve been talking to Katsuki. They definitely had a fight about it, probably even a bit of a physical one judging by the new burn marks on the wall of the living room.

You know they must’ve made up when you open your bedroom door to find them naked and entangled in bed, blanket pulled up over their waists. The soft light from the bathroom night light makes them somewhat visible in the dark. You see Shouto resting his head on Katsukis chest, arm thrown over his stomach. Your body flushes hotly and your stomach drops, twisting with hurt. You heart pulses with the negative emotion as you stand there in the doorway.

You love seeing them together but you and Shouto are still caught up in the middle of this argument. You sigh and move into the room, stripping your hero costume off, tossing the dirty clothes in the hamper. You move to your dresser and go ahead and pull on a large T-shirt and clean underwear. As you make your way into the master bathroom, using the night light to guid you, you’ve decided you really can’t be bothered to get in the shower.

Water drips down your arms as you lean over the sink to wash your face. You feel the layer of grime that comes off when you rinse it off, cupping the water from the faucet and let it run over you skin. As you bring up a fluffy towel to pat your skin dry, you look in the mirror, taking in your appearance. You look the same way you feel, as if you’ve been hit by a truck. Bags under your eyes, skin pale, a sad look in your eyes. The past couple weeks have been sitting on your shoulders heavily. You quickly look away and turn around while you brush your teeth. You stare off into space as you lean your hip against the sink, feeling the tiredness dragging you down.

Spitting into the sink you rinse your mouth and use mouthwash, pulling your hair into a bun and flipping off the light switch. You take a few steps towards your bed, but your face scrunches in uneasiness as you get close and you pause right before the side edge. You realize you can’t sleep in here tonight. Swallowing around a lump in your throat, heart beating hard and feeling like you’re going to be sick you quickly turn and walk towards the door to your room. As you reach the doorway your hear a sleep filled voice murmur your name. You freeze, recognizing Shoutos voice. He must have woken up and heard you moving around.

You don’t hear any other movement after that, just the sound of Katsukis soft snores and you think Shouto must’ve fallen back asleep. You make your way to the living room. Your eyes adjust to the dark and you’re able to make your way over to the large, fluffy sectional you have. You lay down on the side where it turns into an L.

Your grab two of the throw blankets from the back of the couch, wanting to be covered completely and you snuggle underneath, resting your head on a squishy pillow. Before you forget you quickly text Katsuki you’re out on the couch and toss your phone close by. Feeling your chest ache, wanting this whole thing to be over, you curl up into a ball, hugging your knees. You desperately just want Shouto to understand where you’re coming from. You’ll talk to him tomorrow, you think, as you close your eyes and feel tears slip out of the sides of your eyes, trailing down your face and forming a little wet spot on the couch near your ear.

——————————————————————

Shouto wakes up the next morning feeling like there’s a gray cloud looming over his head when his alarm goes off. He’s staring at Katsukis side profile, admiring his pretty face. He notices that he and the blonde are both only in their briefs and he remembers the night they had. He smiles briefly, before his memory provides him with the fact that you weren’t there. It makes him feel sad, chest squeezing like a vice as he thinks about the argument he’s been having with you. His lips turn into a frown. To top it off, it doesn’t help that he ended up being the only one out of all three of you that has to work today.

He doesn’t know how it happened. Wait, yes he does, it’s because of his dick of a father. As he contemplates whether or not he really needs this hero job with Endeavor, he realizes something isn’t quite right as he lays in your shared bed. The cool air of the room tickles the back of his neck and the baby hairs there stand straight up. Once he notices that something missing here is you, his pulse immediately stutters and kicks into overdrive.

He flips around in bed, heart jumping into his throat, seeing you’re not there and instantly he’s frantically tumbling out of bed, waking up Katsuki in the process, jostling him around. Shouto trips on the blanket when it gets trapped around his ankle as he tries to stand up. Letting out a yelp, he goes down with a hard thud, shoulder hitting the floor and he groans, rolling onto his back.

“Oi, oi! What the fuck are you doing dumbass?!” Katsuki yells, sitting up straight in the bed, hand already raised, palm sparking dangerously out of habit. His eyes wildly scan the room for the threat until they land on the his sprawled out boyfriend. He lowers his hand and his gaze narrows. He lets out a frustrated growl. Shouto tilts his head and sees Katsuki sitting up, staring down at him over the side of the bed.

His mismatched eyes widen again when he remembers what made him get up so fast in the first place. He sits up, quickly getting to his feet. He all but launches himself at Katsuki, who braces himself for the impact. Shouto grabs the other mans arms, one hand burning Katsukis skin and the other icy. Katsuki feels his lip curl up at the tight grip as he listens to Shouto whisper your name. He shakes Katsuki by his biceps.

“She’s not in the bed! What if she didn’t come home last night? What if she got hurt out on patrol yesterday and we didn’t know?” Shouto says, voice edging on panic, the left side of his face and hair starting to catch fire. Katsuki violently shakes Shoutos grip from him and pushes roughly at his chest, shoving him backwards. It forces him take a step away so Katsuki can raise up from the bed.

The damp palms of his hands make contact with Shoutos bare chest, slapping loudly. Katsuki pushes in close to him, lips pulled up into a sneer and eyebrows furrowed. He looks menacing as he shoves a finger into Shoutos chest. For the first time since their days at UA, Shouto feels a bit afraid of his boyfriend. He’s ignorantly lit a match in his partner and now Katsuki is a raging inferno. Shouto looks down, stunned at the appendage digging into his skin, unable to speak.

“Let’s get something straight here you fucking idiot. Number one, she is here, but she’s sleeping on the couch so you can chill the fuck out. You want to know why? It’s because for the past two goddamn weeks you’ve been blowing us off like we mean nothing to you and I spent the other night holding her while she cried her eyes out about it,” he growls, jaw clenching tightly as he pauses to take his finger off Shoutos chest. He starts to blow around the room furiously, leaving Shouto frozen in place.

Katsuki notices the frost trickling down the other heros arm and huffs agitatedly. The blonde angrily picks up a pair of sweatpants and whips around to stare down Shouto. “Number two, you know this shit has been breaking her heart. So you better fucking fix it, today, or you’re gonna have to face down with me and I swear to god you won’t like that. Fucking put your hair out, you’re gonna burn down the damn house,” he bites, slamming the bathroom door shut fiercely enough Shouto thinks the door frame shakes.

Feeling like Katsuki has kicked him in the back of the knees, knocking his legs out from under him, he sits on the edge of the bed. Sadness and hurt clash together in his chest and it’s all he can do to run his shaky fingers over his short hair, snuffing out the flames. He stares at where the door was slammed shut. He wasn’t even able to say anything, throat feeling like sandpaper when he swallows.

Shouto knew you were upset and he was already determined for the two of you to make up from this fight, but he didn’t know you had cried in Katsukis arms. It made his stomach roll painfully, feeling like he may throw up. Looking at the clock he notices he’s going to be late and he stands on wobbly legs. He gets ready for work silently, trying to push this whirlwind of emotions down until he can get home from work. Shouto pulls on his hero costume and if he wipes stray tears away from his cheeks in the process, nobody else would know.

The second you hear Shouto leave is when you finally open your eyes. You had heard Katsuki shouting at him and you pretended to be asleep in case Sho came out to the living room. Your adrenaline was pumping and you didn’t want to get into a blow out fight with Shouto and make him feel even worse when he has to go out into the street and patrol. He can’t afford to risk his life and be distracted out there. You know in your heart that the two of you have to reconcile today and you’ll do whatever it takes to make things right.

You love the two of them so much and as hurt as you’ve been feeling, you don’t want Shouto to be in pain either. He’s your partner, your lover and one of your soulmates. He makes your days sunnier. Shouto never fails to make you laugh, even when he doesn’t mean to. You love when he asks you about the little things that most people assume are common knowledge. There are some things he never got to enjoy growing up. You will say it until your dying breath, but one of the best parts of your life, has been being able to watch him experience everything he’s missed out on.

You sniffle and throw the blankets off, padding into the bedroom quietly. You flop down in your large memory foam bed, quick to lay in the warm spot Katsukis body left behind. You pull the fluffy blanket up over your shoulder and wait for Katsuki to get out of the shower. You need him to hold you again and let his warm love soothe your aching heart.

————————————————————-

It’s late, but not too late when you hear Shouto come through the door. Love and excitement bursts in your chest knowing he’s home early and on time. You had texted the group chat the three of you share earlier today and told him to be home in time for dinner. All three of you are going to mend this crack that’s been festering in between you and Shouto recently.

Katsuki decided to make his new version of his fried rice recipe again, wanting the three of you to actually share it together this time. Katsuki is busy in the kitchen and it smells amazing in your home. You can see him at the stove when you turn around and you can’t help but glance at him multiple times. You’ve been sitting nervously on your couch, blanket wrapped around you as the two of you waited for Shouto.

You’ve been picking at your nails waiting for him. Once you hear the door unlock you shoot to your feet, blanket falling to the couch. Despite your eagerness you walk slowly around the couch to get in Shoutos pathway. You stop a few feet in front of him as he pauses a couple steps into your home. You wring your fingers together sheepishly, giving him a shy smile and shift your weight from foot to foot.

His pretty mismatched eyes flicker all over your face, as if he’s trying to burn your imagine into his brain. He settles on making eye contact with you and his eyes light up brightly. You feel instant butterflies, much like the first time you saw Shoutos pretty face, all those years ago your first day at UA. He gives you a small smile, which in Shoutos language is a happy grin.

You can’t help it when your lips tug into a smile so wide it makes your cheeks hurt and suddenly he’s walking towards you. He’s bending over to wrap his arms around your waist, hugging you tightly, resting his forehead on your shoulder.

“Baby,” he breathes, wearing his heart on his sleeve. “I’ve missed you little love,” he whispers, kissing your shoulder.

You make a soft sound of joy, snaking your arms around his neck and burying your face into the warm skin there. He lifts you off the ground and you squeak lightly, securing your legs around his hips. The two of you stand there, hugging for a moment. Taking time to soak in each others warmth and presence.

“God, I missed you too Sho,” you say, pressing the words into his skin, hoping they’ll stay there permanently.

You felt like you hadn’t seen him in a month and feeling his heartbeat against your chest, you felt like you could cry. You missed the subtle feeling of his two different body temperatures making your skin tingle.

“You two idiots gonna stand there the whole night or are we finally gonna try this rice I made,” Katsuki complains, hands on his hips but he has a smirk on his lips. His heart feels like it may burst, love overflowing as he watches the two of you interact after what felt like an eternity. You and Shouto both turn your heads to look at him, you giggle softly, letting your legs unwind from Shouto. He sets you gently back down on the floor before he kisses your forehead, lips lingering for a moment. You hum softly and your eyes flutter shut leaning into his chest. Not everything is fixed but even with this unspoken communication you can feel everything will be alright.

————————————————————-

After a long conversation at the dining table and some mouth watering, orgasm inducing fried rice, you find yourself in your bed, between Katsukis wide spread thighs. He’s leaning his back against a couple of pillows propped up on the headboard and your head is resting on his thigh. The soft blonde hair on his leg tickling your face. You’re on your elbows and knees, ass propped up in the air for Shouto. The hand opposite your head trails up Katsukis inner thigh. He shivers in response.

You stare at the blondes hard, thick cock, that’s he currently got a hand wrapped around. He uses one hand to pump his shaft slowly, thumb running over his tip as he threads the other one through your hair. He bites his bottom lip when you look up into his ruby red eyes. You look fucked out, cheeks pink and eyes lidded. It feels like electricity shoots down both your spines when you lock eyes.

You feel both of Shoutos hands grip your ass cheeks and spread them apart from behind. You feel the cool hair against your ass and your nails dig into Katsukis thigh eyes fluttering shut. You choke out a moan when you feel Shoutos slick, warm tongue press against your clit, flicking it gently and dragging it down through your dripping folds. You gasp sharply and raise your head from Katsukis thigh, resting your weight on your elbows in between the blondes thighs. Shoutos started licking at your clit relentlessly, dipping his tongue inside of your hole as he slips two lube covered fingers into your ass. He’s using his left hand, so the fingers are extra warm and it makes your belly fill with bubbling, heated honey. There’s an aching burn as he stretches your rim, spreading your puffy hole. The fingers in your hair tug tightly forcing you to look up into Katsukis intense eyes.

“Fucking hell, look at you, such a pretty puppy. You love when Sho eats your pussy, don’t you? Mm we’re gonna have him fuck you so well, I can’t wait,” Katsuki smirks, tugging your head forward when you jolt towards him. You curse loudly, ass clenching around Shoutos fingers as he sucks harshly on your clit.

“Sho, oh my god,” you groan, mouth dropping open. The craving in you wins out and you let your tongue flick out to lick at the head of Katsukis cock. You run your tongue over his slit, tasting him. The blonde gasps, grinning, looking smug. His hand stilling it’s motion on his dick as he grips the base of his cock. He feels himself throb against his hot palm. You run your tongue up the underside of his shaft, feeling his soft, silky skin, desperately wanting to suck him off.

You get distracted though when Shouto takes it upon himself to hum against your pussy at that moment and you almost scream. You groan, panting and your eyelids flutter but you keep them open, trying to focus on the cock in front of your face. Katsuki notices where you gaze has been occupied and smiles coyly. He taps his cock head against your soft lips a couple times, tip sticky with precum. He moans lowly at the contact and you lick him off your lower lip, savoring his taste.

“Fuck, you’re so hot, you wanna suck on my cock baby?” he coos, voice edging on mean.

“Yes, fuck Kat, wanna feel you in my throat,” you moan loudly, brushing your lips on his dick. The other hero sucks at your slick folds, rolling your clit between his lips and it’s getting hard to focus. Your head feels light and you think you may cum feeling Shouto slip a third slick finger into your ass, thrusting them shallowly. You aren’t sure when he got the lube in the first place, but it feels heavenly letting his fingers create that friction, dragging against your walls. You can’t see behind you but you can hear the slick movement of Shoutos hand pumping his cock as he eats you out and fingers your ass. The image makes your belly tighten and your clit twitch in his mouth.

“What do you think Sho? Should I let her suck my cock while you finish stretching her tight ass?” Katsuki asks cockily, grinning at Shouto over your shoulder. Shouto takes his mouth from your pussy, sitting up straight, making you whine in protest and he giggles, pressing his fingers deeper in your ass in apology. He meets Katsukis gaze excitedly, one corner of his mouth tugging into a small smile. You feel your elbows ache from holding your weight up as you listen for Shoutos answer.

“Oh, well yes, I think I would like to see that,” Shouto says softly, cheeks turning pink from arousal. His lips are shiny from eating your pussy. He hears your groan when he absently spreads his fingers in your ass and he glances down at where your face is hovering near the blondes shaft. He feels his own cock twitch at the thought of seeing your lips stretched around Katsukis pretty dick. Katsuki laughs and smirks down at you, pulling your head forward. You open eagerly as he guides his cock in. You immediately wrap your lips around his tip. You suck harshly, swirling your tongue around it and slide your lips down, taking him halfway into your mouth. You feel a pulse of arousal in your pussy as the weight of his cock sits heavy on your tongue.

“Fuck! You’re Sho and I’s pretty little pup aren’t you? God your mouth feels so good,” Katsuki rumbles, head tilting backwards, letting out a groan from his chest as he helps guide your slick, hot mouth up and down his cock. Fingers tight in your hair, his nails scratching at your scalp. It sends painful tingles down to your neck but you love it. The way your tongue rolls over his shaft as you suck him off makes his free hand clench the sheets, desperately trying not to cum yet.

Shouto is watching with all his attention as he sees the blondes cock vanish repeatedly into your mouth, your lips red and stretched tight. Shoutos been on the receiving end of your wicked mouth and he doesn’t know how Katsuki lasts so long. His stamina is impressive in everything he does. As you suck Katsukis cock, the aching burn of Shoutos fingers turn into a pleasurable one and your clit throbs. You hum around the blondes dick and Katsuki can’t help the long whine that rips from his throat. His hips jerk up and the fingers in your hair tug you down. You scramble to grip his thighs as his cock pushes into your throat.

It feels so good you can’t even think as he keeps you still for a few seconds. You feel spit drip out of your mouth and down his shaft. You don’t gag, but your airway is cut off, effectively suffocating you and you hear Shouto whimper from behind. He slips his fingers free from your ass and your wet pussy clenches from the uncomfortable sensation. Katsuki lets you go after that, fingers falling from your hair. Your lungs burn as you take in a few deep breaths, breasts heaving as your chest expands and deflates rapidly. You look up, neck stiff from being held tightly, to see Katsukis pretty face, flushed bright pink. You’re still holding onto the blondes thighs.

“Baby, please, let me fuck you,” Shouto whines desperately, placing a hand on your belly and pressing you up from between Katsukis thighs onto your knees. His large palm covers a good amount of your stomach and it makes your cheeks flush. You let him reposition you, feeling his warm chest against your back once you’re straight up. Shoutos nose nuzzles the side of your neck. His hands trace up your belly from your hips.

His slender digits tickling your ribs before he grips both your breasts, pinching your nipples between his fingers. He lets the temperatures of both hands intensify and you almost sob, the different sensations giving you goosebumps. Your head falls back on his shoulder, moaning softly as you reach a hand down to rub your clit in small, fast circles. You’re so fucking turned on and you notice how wet you are. You can’t wait any longer, pussy aching for Shoutos cock. Your heart rate picks up erratically.

“Yes Sho, my baby, I need you, I want both of you,” you say breathlessly, lifting your head and looking down into Katsukis sharp eyes, making eye contact with him. His gaze had been glued to where Shouto had a hold of your breasts. Shouto lets go of your tits and grabs your hips again tightly, groan vibrating into your shoulder. You look down to where Katsuki is lazily stroking his cock again. He smirks at you and your face heats up at his gaze. He reaches his free hand out to you.

“Well? Let me stretch that sweet ass of yours and I’ll let Sho get his dick wet inside your pretty pussy,” he purrs, cheeky grin never leaving his face. You feel Shouto rumble against your back once more. You gently take Shoutos fingers from your hips, squeezing them once before letting go. You crawl towards Katsuki, who lets go of his cock and pushes himself up more into a sitting position. He bends his knees and plants his feet, waiting for you. Getting in between his thighs, you bite your lip, smiling sweetly at him. You get into his space and quickly peck his lips once, feeling how soft he is. You love kissing him.

He smiles, a grin that shows his love and its full force is directed at you. Not many people can handle it, it’s a bit like walking on the surface of the sun. You and Shouto would happily burn to ash for him. You’re so grateful for him and how he’s supported you and Shouto the past few days. You feel overwhelmed with love, chest so warm and full of the feeling you may cry. Unable to resist you lean forward and whisper a sweet I love you in his ear. When you look back at him, his cheeks are red and he’s wearing a frown. Giggling, you wink at him, turning around. You settle a knee on the outside of each of his thighs. You find you’re able to brace your hands on the blondes knees when he bends you forward a little, a gentle hand on your lower back.

You bite your bottom lip, watching as Shouto makes his way to the two of you. You notice his face looks content and you’re positive he watched your interaction with Katsuki. He sits on his calves before you, in between Katsukis spread feet. Placing a hand on his cheek, you run a thumb over his scar underneath his eye. You grin at him, whispering how much you love him as well. His face turns red and he says it back gently. You look down and see his pretty cock standing straight up against his belly, precum leaking from the tip and he has his hands on his thighs.

“Ready puppy?” Katsuki whispers hotly, kissing the back of your shoulder. The slow simmer of fire between all of you, turns into a blaze immediately when you hear the blondes words. You nod eagerly, looking into Shoutos eyes.

“Yes Kat, I’m ready,” you whisper, shifting your body forward a bit to expose your ass even more. You hear Katsuki all but purr and the tip of his cock is suddenly running over your slick hole. Your body feels too hot and it’s like your skin doesn’t fit. Katsuki wraps a hand around the base of his cock, keeping it steady and using his free hand to guide you down by your hip until his cock catches on your hole.

Your hands shoot out to brace yourself on Shoutos shoulders, eyes widening and fingers digging into his skin. It’s a slow press at first and you whimper loudly when your rim stretches, fitting to the shape of the blondes dick. Shouto leans his forehead against yours when he sees the wince on your face, eyes squeezing shut in pain as Katsukis cock slips in past your rim and you involuntarily clench around him, gasping loudly. The blonde chokes a bit at the feeling, his cock being wrapped in your impossibly tight heat. Your pussy throbs and your ass aches, but you know the pain will soon fade to an intense pleasure.

“It’s okay little love, I’ve got you, hold my hands okay? You know you can take Kat, you’re doing so good,” Shouto whispers and coos, nuzzling your noses together. You nod, nuzzling him back and yelp as you feel Katsuki slide in even further, slowly bottoming out. You groan, eyes opening wide and Shouto takes your hands from his shoulders. He laces your fingers together and lets you brace your weight on him. You take a deep breath, letting out a shaky exhale before you start to trade slow kisses with Shouto until you’re fully seated in Katsukis lap. Once your ass brushes against his pelvis you break from the kiss and let yourself adjust to the dull throbbing sensation. Katsuki isn’t fairing much better, panting heavily, almost growling in his throat.

“Shit, your ass is so tight, you’re doing so good. I’m gonna move okay my pretty little pup? I wanna get Sho inside of you,” he murmurs in a raspy voice. You finally lean back from letting your forehead rest against Shoutos and you press your ass down into the blondes lap, pushing him in just a bit deeper.

“Yes, yes definitely, I want Sho inside of me too,” you say lovingly, looking straight into Shoutos eyes. His mouth drops open slightly and he squeezes your hands tight. Katsuki knows this is supposed to be a way for the three of you to reconnect, but he knows you and Shouto need to be face to face while you have sex. The two of you need the intimacy and reassurance that the other is there.

He knows you want Shouto slipping into your pussy and squishing you between the two of their chests as they make love to you. With determination in mind Katsuki starts to help you move up and down on his cock, holding your waist. You again brace your weight on Shoutos hands, starting to ride Katsuki to get yourself used to the feeling. Shouto watches your face, not wanting to miss any of your expressions. He kisses your cheeks and whispers sweet nothings to you.

“Please! Please, Kat, I need Sho too,” you choke out after a few moments. Katsuki exhales heavily behind you, biceps flexing as he helps you ride him. He lets out a whimper, pulling you down into his lap, holding you still.

“Sho, baby, let go of her hands for a second okay?” Katsuki tells him softly.

“Yes Kat,” Shouto replies obediently, releasing you. Katsuki is quick to pull you back against his chest, forcing your knees out from under you so your ass is firmly in his lap and your feet are planted on the bed near his. Your eyes widen when you feel the blondes hands slip underneath your knees and pull your thighs up towards your chest. He’s got you in what is basically a full Nelson at this point, minus his hands laced behind your head.

“Katsuki!” you gasp, feeling your wet pussy spread open completely for Shouto and your sure the blonde’s giving the other a good view of where his cock is nestled in your ass. You watch Shoutos cock kick against his belly as he takes in the two of you. You’re positive Katsuki is smirking at him over your shoulder.

“Well Sho? Are you gonna fuck her sweet pussy or are you waiting for an invitation?” he says, voice mocking. Shoutos face heats up and he glares at Katsuki slightly. It only makes him laugh.

“C’mon Sho, please? Show me how sorry you are and make love to me,” you purr, pushing your lower lip out at him. You let your head fall back against Katsukis shoulder and place your fingers on your pussy lips, spreading them open to show Shouto how wet you are. His mismatched eyes stare at your slick folds and his cock aches. He inches forward until he’s right before you.

He wraps a hand around his shaft and his tip accidentally slides through your folds. A whimper slips from his lips at the contact and he feels like he could cum just from feeling your warm, wet pussy like this. He can’t hold back anymore, he lines his dick up with your hole, places his hands on your inner thighs and he watches his dick disappear as he presses himself inside of you.

“Sh-Shouto, oh fuck, you feel so good,” you stutter, feeling split wide open, Shouto stuffing you all the way. He pushes in until hips press against you snuggly. He keeps letting out soft moans as your pussy sucks him in. He can feel Katsukis cock rubbing up against his through your walls and it’s driving him absolutely insane. He feels like a live wire. He’s either gonna melt or cum and he’s honestly worried he may either set the bed on fire or freeze it, his quirk trying to rise to the surface. Shouto remains in control and bites his lower lip, feeling the way he fits in your pussy perfectly snug.

You can feel Katsuki bite down, sharp canines digging into the muscle of your shoulder as Shoutos cock slides in against his. His grip gets even tighter under your knees and you’ve got your arms behind you, wrapped around the blondes neck, fingers threaded through his soft hair to hang on.

“Sho, f-fucking move, I have a limited amount of space. I’m aching, so for the love of God, move,” Katsuki growls against your skin, teeth clenched. He can feel his dick throbbing in your ass. Shouto whines, leaning down to suck one of your nipples into his mouth, biting roughly on your perky bud before letting it go. A yelp escapes your lips and the sharp pain flashes straight to your pussy. It makes you clench around both cocks currently splitting you open.

The two of them groan in surprise. You moan Shoutos name lowly and your back arches trying to get him to move his hips. Shouto braces his hands on the headboard behind Katsuki, gripping the wood, fingernails scratching at it. He pulls his hips out halfway, before swiftly thrusting back in, cock rubbing against Katsukis deliciously. Every inch of you is pulsing. All three of you moan collectively. The sound so sweet when it reaches your ears.

Shouto starts a slow, rough pace, fucking into you lovingly. The slow pace is making you feel every inch his cock drags against your pussy. Your filled with a warm syrupy heat as Shouto brushes his lips against yours. Breath hot against your mouth as he trades kisses with you. He leans down further to do the same with Katsuki. He does so back and forth until his hands start to get sweaty on the headboard and you can feel Katsuki moving his hips upwards the best he can, starting to get closer to the edge.

The way their cocks fill you, dragging slickly against your walls, has you on the verge of cumming in no time at all. Shouto kissing you so sweetly and whispering how much he loves you in your ear doesn’t help. His lips tickle your ear. You balance yourself on the blondes chest by switching your hold from his neck to hanging on to Katsukis forearms and crying out softly for both of them. You feel small, squished between their chests and you’re on another planet, blissed out, smoldering in the intimacy of what the three of you are entangled in.

The knot starts to tighten in your lower abdomen. Every thrust of Shoutos causes the knot to wind up tighter. Katsuki is barely hanging on, moaning repeatedly against your shoulder. His cock is squeezed so tightly in your ass, every slide of Shoutos cock against his makes a pleasurable shiver travel down his spine. He lets go of your knees and wraps his arms around your waist, squeezing you tight. Shoutos hands immediately come off the headboard, pressing on the underside of your thighs to keep you bent in half, nails digging into your flesh.

“Fuck, fuck, my sweet puppy, Sho, I’m gonna fucking cum,” Katsuki says, voice wrecked as he lifts his head from your shoulder to look at Shouto. The two of them lock eyes and Shouto notices that the blondes eyes are half lidded, his cheeks rosy and he nods leaning his weight further on you, squishing Katsuki under you. You feel your back sticking against Katsukis overheated chest, his heart racing. You’re all sweating now, hanging on as Shouto moves his hips quickly now, want to push you both over the edge. The sound of wet skin smacking together rings throughout the room.

“Ah! ah, hah-nnngh! Sho! Just like that, please, oh fuck I’m gonna cum too, please Katsuki,” you wail, begging both of them, the change in angle of Shoutos hips hitting your sweet spot and pushing you up the mountain towards the peak of your orgasm. Katsuki was already about to cum and within the next few thrusts from Shouto, all of a sudden his arms tighten around your waist, his hips jerking upwards. Katsukis balls tighten and he stills. Gasping loudly and letting it out in a low moan as you feel his dick pulse, filling you with his warm release.

“Katsuki you’re so pretty, I love the way you cum,” Shouto whispers, unable to look away from his boyfriends mesmerizing face. Shouto is panting, fucking into you roughly as the blondes red eyes stay locked on his. Katsukis jaw hangs open as his dick twitches a couple more times in your ass, letting the last of his orgasm flow through him, before he deflates, letting his forehead bury into the side of your neck.

“Sho please, I wanna cum, please,” you whine softly, almost tearing up when he looks at you. He leans forward placing his forehead on yours again, trying to get as close as he can, as if he wants to be inside of your skin completely.

“Oh yes, fuck my sweet, let go princess, I wanna feel you cum around my cock,” Shouto says lowly, blunt as always. You nod, letting out a choked sob as you feel one of Katsukis hands leave your waist and slide down to rub quick, small circles into your clit. The slick from your pussy making his fingers slippery as they massage your swollen bud. Your mouth opens into an O shape and you can’t think straight any longer. It’s so hot in the room you know it’s Shoutos fault but it just adds to the intensity. Thank God Katsuki has good control over his quirk.

The blondes fingers circle your clit at the same time Shoutos cock bullies your sweet spot just right and it sends you flying high. The knot in your belly releases and you scream their names as you cum, limbs tingling in warm, syrupy pleasure. They don’t fucking stop, pushing you past the point of oversensitive. Your have no time to recover, eyes widening as you know you have less than 10 seconds before you’re gonna cum again, but this time there’s a threatening pressure on your bladder and you know exactly what it means. You’re squirming in their grip and trying to get Katsukis hand away from your clit by gripping his wrist but it doesn’t work.

“Sho, Kat! Shit! I’m gonna squirt-please!” you cry, trying to move but it’s too late, the others ignore you, knowing you love it. You heart hammers and all of sudden your back’s arching and your legs are shivering under Shoutos grip. You feel the first pulse of your orgasm wash over you and your holes squeeze them both. Katsuki quickly moves his hand from your clit as you squirt hard. The warm liquid splashes on Shoutos lower belly and that fucking pushes him over the finish line.

Watching Katsukis face when he cums, feeling your pussy hug his cock so tightly and your warm release that covers his belly, it’s too much. He fucks all the way into you, hips staying in place as he cums. Sticky, warm ropes of his orgasm fill your pussy. He moans softly and squeezes his eyes shut. You’ve started to come down for your own orgasm and you hear Katsuki breathing heavily. You frame Shoutos face with your hands and pull him closer, kissing him firmly. He moans into your mouth, dick twitching once more and you roll your tongue over his before letting him go. Lips parting with a slick sound. You bite your tongue and smile adoringly at him. Shouto kisses your nose swiftly and you giggle.

“That was fucking hot,” Katsuki rumbles, snorting in amusement. You laugh in agreement and wince, feeling your hips aching from being stuck in this position. Not to mention how sore your ass feels. You place your hands on Shoutos chest, pushing slightly, wanting him to move. You call his name softly and give him a pointed look when you get his attention. His eyes open wider and he smiles softly at you, realizing you probably want out of this pretzel like position.

“Sorry little love,” Shouto teases, letting your thighs down and biting his lower lip as he slips his half hard cock out of your pussy and scoots backwards to sit on his calves. He looks exhausted, but happy. You groan in relief, hips feeling infinitely better as you wiggle on Katsukis lap. You hear the blonde moan, smacking the side of your hip in a warning.

“Oi, you cheeky little pup, get off my lap, my legs are fucking falling asleep,” Katsuki says, teasing you. You laugh and slide off his lap. The sensation always strange as your ass feels empty. You flop down on the mattress next to the blonde. He immediately stretches his legs out, his knees cracking and he makes a content sound. Shouto lounges in front of him, belly and cock glistening from your orgasm and you blush a little bit, feeling embarrassed of making such a mess. Fuck you shouldn’t find that so hot. He just smirks when he catches you looking. You swallow, clearing your throat, quickly standing up from the bed, feeling their releases starting to drip from you. You love having sex with them but the aftermath is disgusting.

“Can we all take a shower please? I feel gross and I want Sho to heat the water like he usually does,” you say, starting to head towards your master bathroom. You pass by Shouto on the way, who’s sitting near the edge of the bed, and you run a hand over his short hair.

“Yes princess,” Shouto replies happily, hopping off the bed. Katsuki snorts but also makes his way to his feet.

“You’ve just got us both wrapped around your finger don’t you?” Katsuki smirks. You laugh, knowing it’s completely true. As you continue your path you feel a tug in your chest, feeling like you physically needed to say you’re sorry again. Even if you did spend over an hour hashing it out over Katsukis fried rice earlier. You stop in front of the bathroom door and turn around to meet their gazes. Your boyfriends pause, Katsuki raises his eyebrow questioningly. You grab each boys hand, lacing your fingers with theirs and look up at them. You focus on Shouto first.

“Sho, I just want to say again I really am sorry we got into this fight, instead of just talking it out in the first place.” Squeezing Shoutos fingers you turn your head, looking over at Katsuki. “Katsuki I’m sorry for dragging you into the middle and thank you for being our rock during this. I love you both more than anything and I’m so happy everything’s okay again,” you say shyly, glancing at both of them. Your cheeks turn red as you see they both are wearing a grin that could melt ice.

“Of course baby, you know we love you too.” Katsuki smirks, squeezing your hand.

“I’m saying sorry again too, I was a dick. I promise I’ll communicate better with the two of you,” Shouto says, tugging you forward into a hug and Katsuki huddles in close. You’re squeezed between two sweaty, sticky chests and you squeal, returning the embrace briefly before breaking free.

“Okay okay! Let’s go shower, you’re both nasty,” you giggle turning to run into the bathroom and Katsuki smacks your ass. He smacks Shoutos ass for good measure. You laugh when you look over your shoulder and you see Shouto frowning at the blonde whining about how that hurt. The two end up following you into the shower, all of you able to fit comfortably in the large area. As you let Shouto wash your hair, scratching your scalp soothingly and you watch Katsuki close his eyes when he lets his hair get soaked under the shower head you can’t help but smile. They’re your boys and you’ll never let anything tear you apart, especially not a damn uncharged cellphone.

#mha x reader #my hero academia #bakutodo #bakugo x reader #katsuki smut #bakugou x reader x todoroki #shouto smut #shouto x reader #bnha fanfiction #bakugou smut #mha todoroki #bakugou katsuki #todoroki shouto #shouto todoroki #katsuki bakugou #mha oneshot #bakugou katuski x reader #todoroki shoto smut #todobaku x reader #todoroki shoto x reader #bakugou x reader #bakugou x todoroki x reader

[livwritesstuff]

inspired by a reply @gregre369 left on yesterday’s post. this is why i love this site so much bc i had this idea floating aimlessly around my brain for such a long time and then someone says something that just connects all the dots for me so - much thanks <3

tw: brief reference to domestic violence

One of parenthood’s biggest surprises (in Eddie’s opinion, anyway) was how easy talking to his and Steve’s daughters about why his parents aren’t in his life was.

He’d figured it’d be hard to figure out exactly how to explain that his mother's death was due to domestic violence caused by his father, who had died in prison twenty years later – but…that about covers it, honestly. Sure, the exact rendition of the story the girls hear varies as they get older, but…it’s pretty straightforward, actually.

Explaining Steve’s situation turned out to be way more complicated for…well, for a lot of reasons, and the fact that his parents are still alive and breathing and choosing to not be around didn't help things at all.

It also didn't help that the girls totally saw Jim and Joyce as Steve’s parents, but it did lead to a conversation that Eddie doesn't think he'll ever forget:

It happened when he was passing through the kitchen to see that Steve was cooking with Moe.

"What're we up to in here?" he asked.

At four years old (she’s actually almost five), Moe has yet to outgrow a phase of picky eating that had started out right around her second birthday. Steve is trying out a new method where he involves Moe in the cooking process in the hopes that she then actually wants to eat the product of her hard work when it’s done. He's seeing varying levels of success.

“We're making burgers,” Moe said, “Poppy’s recipe.”

Eddie looked at Steve skeptically, “Poppy Jim or Poppy Joyce?”

Steve rolled his eyes, “I’m telling Joyce you said that.”

And then he added, “Jim.”

Satisfied, Eddie continued on his way.

“How come you call your dad Jim?” Moe asked.

And that had Eddie pausing in the hallway just out of their line of sight.

“Well, Poppy’s not my dad, sweet pea,” Steve replied.

“Did you not have a dad?”

“I did have a dad – I do. He lives in Indiana with my mom. We don't really talk to each other anymore though."

"Why?"

"When I was younger, I decided that they didn’t take care of me like I needed them too, and Jim and Joyce stepped in to be like my parents instead."

It's not completely accurate, Eddie knows (and he doesn't love the way Steve is shifting culpability away from his parents because that shit was fully on them, but whatever; it's his story and he can tell it however he want), but just like how they don't have a completely accurate picture of what happened to Eddie's mom either, they know what they need to know for now and they'll hear more down the line.

“But what did your mom and dad do?” Moe asked.

"Well, you know how Daddy and I read to you and play with you and put you to bed and make food for you – it was a little different because I was older and I needed different stuff than that, but…”

Eddie watched Steve look back at their oldest daughter, watched him see the look of confusion in her big brown eyes.

“They didn’t do that?” Moe asked, sounding perplexed.

Steve shook his head, and Moe continued to look at him as if he might suddenly tell her he was joking.

“That’s crazy,” Moe finally said, and Steve let out a laugh.

“It is kinda crazy, isn’t it?” he agreed, “That’s why I love being your dad so much, because it’s actually so easy to want to take care of you. Even though you sometimes like to make it hard on purpose, right?”

“Yeah,” she grinned proudly, “Like when I make you snuggle me more at bedtime and you fall asleep by accident and then the kitchen is messy in the morning."

"Uh-huh," Steve said, poking her in the side so she giggled, "Exactly like that."

"You're a good dad," Moe told him.

"You think?" Steve asked as he pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

"The best dad."

“The best?” he repeated, “Can’t let Daddy hear that.”

“He can hear it.”

#cue moe yelling for eddie so she can say it to his face #she later affirms it's actually a tie #steddie #liv’s steddie dads verse #steddie dads #steve harrington #eddie munson #tw: domestic violence

[wileys-russo]

childhood sweethearts (5) II a.russo x reader

series playlist part one part two part three part four

and as we await the fate of our two main protagonists eventual kiss. its time to find out what really happened six years ago. childhood sweethearts (5) II a.russo x reader

"do i need to pick you up tomorrow then?" your older sister lily asked as she pulled up outside the russo household, drumming her fingers on her steering wheel as you unbuckled and shook your head.

"no i'll probably stay the full weekend and just go to school with less on monday." you shrugged, reaching around to grab your bag off the backseat. "what about your uniform? books? your bag?" your sister frowned as you opened her door.

"i've got a spare uniform here, i can borrow a bag to put my stuff in and i've already got my books with me, i have to study." you patted your overnight bag as the girl rolled her eyes. "of course you do, does your brain even know what a weekend is or do you mentally go to school 7 days a week?" she jeered as you mocked her and flipped her off, closing her door as her window rolled down.

"some of us have aspirations to graduate lilian." you smiled, your sister having dropped out early to pursue a career in cosmetics which had lasted all of three months. "have a shit time dickhead!" your sister called out after you as you made your way down the driveway, flipping her off again without turning around.

"none of that here thank you young lady." your face flushed red as carol opened the front door for you before you'd even arrived, having seen you through the window. "sorry carol." you smiled guiltily, giving her a hug as she let you in with an amused smile.

"lessi's just showering sweetheart." the woman explained as you hummed, leaving your bag by the lounge and following her to the kitchen, you'd been wondering why the girl hadn't responded to you on the way over here and now it made sense.

"shortstack! i saw your hot sister dropped you off." gio wiggled his eyebrows suggestively before pulling you into a gentle headlock as you rounded the corner. "urgh you're like my brother gio thats so weird!" you gagged at the comment, wrestling to try and remove his arm to no use.

"oi get off her!" his grip disappeared as alessia entered, bottle blonde hair pulled up into a damp bun on her head as she punched her brother in the ribs, immediately pulling you into a protectively tight hug as gio let you go with a loud groan of pain.

"mum!" the boy huffed in complaint, your girlfriend rolling her eyes and mumbling an apology as the older women told her off. "i wish you'd fuck off back to jordan." the boy sulked, grabbing an apple and heading back upstairs to his room as carol yelled after him for swearing.

your girlfriend had only just gotten back yesterday from a week away at a junior lionesses tournament which had been held in jordan. as much as you'd missed her dearly you couldn't have been more proud of her or the two goals she scored, getting her rightful start in the final game. you'd only wished you were able to be there but you didn't have the luxury of a national call up as an excuse to miss a week of school.

"we'll be in my room mum." alessia announced, arm slung over your shoulder as the woman hummed and waved you off, head buried in a recipe book making you smile as your girlfriend lead you away, stopping to grab your bag for you, silencing your protests with a very quick peck to your lips after she'd triple checked no one else was around.

the pair of you had been seeing one another officially for almost two years now however no one but each other actually knew that, and just assumed you were best friends, forever thick as thieves and inseparably close.

neither of you had any idea how no one had caught on yet, maybe it was because you and alessia had always been so close and so affectionate nothing seemed out of sorts to the average eye.

you'd always loved alessia in one way or another. but when it was just the two of you behind a closed door and your lips were pressed together, cold hands roaming one anothers bodies, murmuring everything and anything you loved about the other, you were absolutely infatuated with her in a way so intense it was almost scary.

and that was one sort of love you both agreed you weren't ready to share with anyone but each other just yet.

though both of you did need to often stumble through pools of awkward lies and ramble quickly made up stories as you'd be called out by your friends for the occasional poorly placed or forgotten about hickey.

this was normally your problem. ever since she'd figured out how sensitive your neck was the taller girl utilised every and any opportunity to capitolise on that.

riled on by the whiny begs for her not to stop as she hungrily attacked and devoured your neck late at night, silencing you with a hand pressed over your mouth and a gentle warning in your ear that if you weren't quiet she would stop.

"hi." you breathed out with a grin, looking up adoringly at the striker once the two of you were finally alone behind the safety and security of her locked bedroom door. "god i missed you." alessia sighed, pulling you into a bone crushing hug as you reveled in one anothers touch.

"we spoke every day lessi!" you laughed into her shoulder, alessia having been told off both by her roommate ella and her coach for the hours spent on her phone when she was supposed to be resting and recovering.

"we could be together every minute of every day and i'd still miss you." the blonde pulled away with a cheeky smile as you rolled your eyes playfully. "don't wish that on me please, what a nightmare!" you groaned teasingly as your girlfriend scoffed, holding a hand to her chest in mock offence.

"lessi!" you squealed as she tackled you down onto her bed, hovering over you. "that's baby to you, thanks very much." alessia pouted as you laughed, thumb stroking her cheek affectionately. "there is also something else i missed that we can't do on the phone." the blonde smiled suggestively, cocking her head to the side as her hair fell around you both like a curtain.

"mmm...nothing comes to mind." you looked off into the distance as if deep in thought, hand coming to stroke your chin as alessia playfully shoved your head. "kiss me then star girl." you smiled softly, tugging at her shirt.

as your eyes met, the world seemed to fade away. you felt her hand gently touch your cheek, slender fingers tracing a line down your jawline. hearts raced as her lips met yours, soft and gentle at first, then with a growing intensity as she poured into the kiss just how much she had missed you.

if you were sentenced to death the next day and were allowed one last day to do as you pleased, you'd be sure to spend it kissing alessia.

every single time felt just like the first. the same nervous butterflies would flutter around inside you, lips would tingle as if you'd just smeared them with popping candy, your heart grew five sizes to the point it felt it might burst in your chest.

each kiss was full of tenderness and passion, a dance of two hearts in perfect harmony as the girl who you trusted with your heart and your life drowned you with her love.

you felt her arms wrap even tighter around you, pulling your bodies close as you lost yourselves in the moment. the world around you ceased to exist, leaving only the two of them in a sea of pure unbridled emotion, two hearts beat as one.

her lips always slightly chapped melded against yours perfectly, kissing you with just the right amount of firm pressure to have your stomach in knots, and yet each touch felt so soft and so tender that your brain went fuzzy at the sensation.

her hand would always reach out to tangle in your hair as your own gently carressed her cheek, thumb stroking her jawline, feeling it clench at the featherlight touch.

and then suddenly your lungs would scream for a reprise and you'd pull away, collapsing into the mattress as both of you lay on your sides, eyes locked as chests heaved and alessia leant forward to brush a few flyaways behind your ear.

gone were the afternoons of her kicking a ball at your head, smearing mud on your face as the two of you wrestled and rolled around in the dirt like steam rollers.

your afternoons now were spent wrapped up in the others arms, sharing kisses as you filled one another in on the seemingly more mundane parts of your day the other hadn't been present for, you and alessia only sharing two classes in your final year of school.

on the days alessia trained after school you studied, often at her house in her bedroom eagerly awaiting her to return.

the striker would have left her boots outside at her mums strict request, trudging up the stairs with an exhausted sigh as you'd perk up hearing the squeak of the infamous stair the two of you learned to avoid when sneaking downstairs for a midnight snack.

she would shoulder open her door and dump her kit bag on the ground, making a beeline for her bed and belly flopping normally on top of you, face buried in your neck as she clung onto you tightly with a mumbled greeting hello.

sometimes you'd wind her up and tell her you wouldn't kiss her until she showered, dodging her attempts as you teased her for smelling terribly which normally ended in her trapping you in a bear hug beneath her until you tapped out on her back and gave in, allowing her lips to finally meet yours.

other times she'd have been told she wasn't starting next game and her head would hang low from the moment she entered the room. you'd immediately sit up and brush your books to the side, opening your arms for her to melt into. carding your fingers through her hair and slipping a hand up her top you'd hold her tightly, rubbing circles on her back, lips lingering on her sweaty forehead.

as you'd always known, you loved alessia, nowadays in a way much more intimate and tender than you'd have ever understood in your youth.

"you're so beautiful." the taller girl spoke softly as you lay side by side, words melting you like butter as you couldn't help but blush, no matter how often she complimented you it still had you swooning.

"why are you so shy? it's very cute baby but we've known each other like our whole lives." alessia laughed as you hid your face in your hands, the blonde prying them away and attacking your face with kisses only making your cheeks heat up further.

her leg nudging yours as you lifted one, allowing hers to slot in perfectly, your limbs tangled up as your foreheads pressed against one anothers.

"il mio bel bambino." (my pretty baby) her lips moved to gently kiss your fingertips, hands held captive in hers.

"you learned more italian!" your face lit up in pride as alessia eagerly nodded, beginning to ramble about how she had made it her mission to continue her online lessons even while away.

"alessia mia teresa russo studying in her free time? has there been an doomsday i wasn't aware of? are you feeling okay?" you gasped holding the back of your hand to her forehead, squealing as her fingers jabbed sharply at your sides.

"yeah well unlike school work this is something i actually want to learn!" she rolled her eyes and you grinned, kissing her nose and swooning as she scrunched it up adorably.

"hey. can we talk about something?" the blonde asked hesitantly, eyes dropping down to avoid yours, messing with your fingers as you nodded, eyebrows knitting into a curiously concerned frown at what was to come.

"okay but i don't know how you'll react so we have to do the thing." alessia decided, looking to you for confirmation as you hummed, the two of you sitting up and spinning around suddenly.

you shuffled slightly so your back was pressed against hers, hands finding one anothers and intertwining your fingers as your heads slumped onto one anothers shoulders, eyes closing.

"what's on your mind lessi?" you asked softly, squeezing her hands supportively as she let out a long sigh. "well. when we were away a few of the girls were talking about their...well their first times, with their boyfriends." alessia started quietly, her heart hammering away in her chest with every word.

"and i guess it just got me thinking about it." she spoke a little quicker now, clearly nervous for your reaction to her words, squeezing your left hand to signal she was done talking for now.

"some of the girls at school have been talking about it too." you confessed. "are you thinking about...wanting to do that?" you asked gently, not wanting her to feel as though you were judging her in any way. "maybe? does that make you feel...weird, or anything?" she asked slowly.

"no, definitely not weird." you promised, the two of you sitting in silence for a moment. "i guess i think i'm ready? to do that. but i don't want you to feel like...pressured into anything. we can do it soon, we can do it later, we can never do it if you didn't want to." she assured, starting to ramble as you squeezed her hands, grounding her into silence again.

"i want to do it with someone i love and someone i trust and you're the person i love and trust the most lessi. i think i'm ready too, whenever it happens." you spoke softly, unable to see the blush creep up your girlfriends neck at your words.

and it did happen. it was a couple of months later when you had your house to yourselves, your parents having taken your brother away for the weekend for a cricket tournament and your sister disappearing around to her boyfriends house.

the first time it was awkward, nervous, weird and clumsy of course, neither of you had done anything like this before and you'd have been lying to one another if you said you both hadn't tried to do some...research on your own to try and best prepare.

but despite that, it was with alessia.

you felt safe and you felt comfortable and loved the whole time, it didn't quite have the ending either of you expected (that sort of ending came a few weeks later and boy oh boy...no amount of research could have prepared you for the feeling) but it only strengthened the trust between the two of you, and was yet another first you'd experienced by one anothers loving side.

they always say your first love is a little foolish, some may even say there isn't something called first love. but what makes those initial feelings of love most beautiful are it's innocence.

when you fall in love for the very first time, that innocence inside you, that's a precious thing. it feels like you give your whole heart to someone, and as if you wouldn't ever know anyone else to treasure and care for it.

which is why it was all too easy for alessia russo to be both your first love, and your first heartbreak.

~

it all started the day you got the letter.

your mum had found it first, fighting her every urge to rip it open and read your fate, instead leaving it neatly on your pillow for you to find when you returned home that afternoon.

you'd spent the day with the russo's, thermos of her dads famous hot chocolate in your hand, bundled up in a hoodie with your girlfriends jersey tugged over the top. you sat shoulder to shoulder with her brothers in the stands, watching your favorite blonde play in one of her final games of the season.

you didn't pretend to understand half the rules of football much as alessia had dedicated years of her life trying to teach you, and so her brothers knew to hit you with running commentary throughout. but the one thing you would always understand was the sense of utter euphoric pride which rushed through you watching her play, especially when she scored.

her arms would shoot up into the air and her eyes would always find yours, pointing up at you and her family with a lopsided grin, sprinting to celebrate with her teammates as you all screamed out encouragement, drowning her in whistles and claps before play resumed.

coming away with a 4-1 win meant they were in pole position to finish top of the table, and so alessia was unable to wipe the shit eating grin off her face as she emerged from the change rooms afterwards, waving goodbye to her team mates and jogging over to where you all waited for her.

she'd always hug her dad first, your girlfriend was the true epitome of his girl, and mario reveled in teasingly holding that over carol. you were always last, alessia always saved the best for last, picking you up and spinning you around off your feet as you'd laugh and sing her praises, the two of you hugging tightly.

"i love when you wear my jersey." she mumbled in your ear, sending you a soft smile as you bumped your shoulder into hers and the two of you made your way back to the car, her brothers talking her ear off about the game as you stayed stuck to her side, watching on with a quiet amusement, not understanding most of what was said but feeling nothing but pride for the taller blonde beside you.

luca had driven himself and gio as they waved you both off and headed across the lot, you and alessia slipping into the back of her dads car. her mum would always fuss over the two of you, throwing a blanket over your legs and ignoring alessia's insistence that she was still warm after running around for two hours, carol always winning out as your girlfriend rolled her eyes and gave in.

but the blanket gave the opportunity for your hand to grab hers, squeezing softly as you looked at her in admiration, her head falling tiredly to your shoulder as the two of you chatted along to her parents, waving them off as you pulled up outside your house.

you promised you'd give your mum a hug for carol, hugging them both goodbye. normally her dad would warn he'd be out the front no later than eight since you both had school the next day, but now graduated there wasn't a reason the two of you couldn't spend the next few days together if you wanted, likely flittering from house to house as you often did.

appeasing your mum with small talk for a few minutes you grew impatient, tugging on the back of alessias hoodie with a longing look as the girl would make an excuse, the two of you hurrying off to your room.

"why do you always make me end the conversations. i quite like chatting with your mum!" alessia rolled her eyes as you closed your bedroom door. "because she loves you more and she actually listens to you. and because i haven't properly congratulated you yet for winning!" you grinned as your girlfriend sat on the end of your bed.

"mm that so?" the blonde smiled, arms settling themselves around your waist as her chin rested on your stomach, your own hands playing with the baby hairs on the nape of her neck.

you were about to lean down and kiss her, when your eyes spotted it.

alessia noticed your frown right away, squeezing your hips to gain your attention as you shook your head, stepping away from her and making a beeline for the letter.

"shit is that-" "i think it is." "well, open it!"

"i'm scared. what if i didn't get in?" you admitted, biting your bottom lip nervously as alessia sat right by your side. "you're the most intelligent person both intellectually and emotionally that i've ever met baby, and you got phenomenal marks in our GCSE's. open it!" she knocked her knee against yours and you nodded.

"oh for god sakes." alessia huffed impatiently as you fiddled with the corner, peeling it off painstakingly slow as your girlfriend plucked it out of your hands, ripping the letter right open.

"no you read it." you shook your head as she tried to give it back to you, alessia nodding as her eyes scanned over the paper, face unreadable as you nervously bounced your knee.

"we regret to inform-" your body crumpled at that, flopping back into the mattress as you felt tears prick at the corner of your eyes. "only joking baby. you got in!" alessia pounced on top of you with a grin as you shot upwards, accidentally smacking your head into hers.

"oh my god i got in?!" you breathed out in shock as the blonde clutched at her throbbing head. "oh god baby i'm so sorry!" you squeaked out as she waved you off with a wince, opening her arms expectantly.

"i am so fucking proud of you. my pretty, smart, funny, kind, gorgeous-" the older girl kissed you with every word, the grin unable to be wiped from your face as your mum burst in, alessia very quickly jumping away from you as you filled her in on the news.

and as you jumped up to embrace her, your sister next to run in to congratulate you, alessia couldn't have possibly been any prouder.

but she also couldn't help but allow her mind to drift back to the box sitting in her wardrobe, signed four year scholarship and enrollment papers filled in and ready to be sent off to the states.

she knew she needed to tell you. but the thought of doing so punched a hole in her chest, and so she put it off as long as possible.

well, as long as she could until you found out yourself.

~

it was around a couple of weeks later, you were spending your usual friday night together, movies loaded and armfuls of snacks spread out on the bed awaiting consumption.

"lessi baby can i have a hoodie please?" you kissed your girlfriends jaw softly, the girl humming and pointing her foot toward her cupboard, engrossed in a video on her phone.

"yeah thanks, such a gentlewoman." you muttered, smacking her thigh as the girl whined and shoved you away. with a roll of your eyes at her lack of attention on you, you thrust open her cupboard, hunting around for your favourite hoodie which you knew she'd hidden, no longer wanting you to steal it as it was also her favourite to wear.

with a victorious grin you spotted the sleeve poking out from a pile of jumpers in the corner, rolling your eyes at her poor attempt at hiding and yanking it out. you frowned as a box lay hidden beneath the material, UNC on the front.

curiousity getting the better of you, assuming it was likely a new pair of trainers she'd bought and hidden from her mum as to not be told off for her spending habits, you opened it.

god, how you wished you hadn't.

your stomach leapt into your mouth as your eyes scanned just the first few words of the letter sat atop a bright blue sweatshirt.

"less. what's this?" at first she only hummed, attention still fixated on the video. "alessia. what is this?" you spoke louder now, the girls phone dropping from her hand as she looked up and saw what you had in your hand.

"baby-" "why the hell have you got a four year american football contract hidden in your wardrobe?"

"i wish you hadn't found that." she sighed, burying her face in her hands as you advanced toward her. "were you even going to tell me?" you whispered now, her head shooting up at the sudden change of tone.

"of course i was! i just...i didn't know how." she admitted guiltily, standing and trying to come toward you but you held your hand up in warning for her not to. "you didn't even tell me you were thinking about something like this, we tell each other everything." your voice cracked and with it so did alessia's heart at the look of utter betrayal splayed across your features.

"love-" "stop. don't fucking coddle me, explain." you forced out, letter still gripped tightly in your hand as you took another step back. "it's a four year scholarship to go play in the states. so long as i play with their junior team i can go to classes, live on campus and get my degree for free, and i get a hell of a lot of experience with a completely different style of football." she explained, a smile tugging momentarily at her lips, wiped right away at the look of disappointment on yours.

"i knew you wouldn't want me to go, or you'd try to talk me out of it." alessia admitted quietly, refusing to meet your eyes. "you what?" you managed out, shaking your head in disbelief. "i-" you started, trying to find the words.

"alessia i have always been your biggest supporter. i don't even like football but i go to every match, i make sure your kit bags got everything in it before you leave, i wear your jerseys, i let you kick balls at my head for years! you adore football. why on earth would you think i'd try to stop you from following that passion?" you frowned, shoulders slumping in defeat at her lack of faith in you.

"because it means we'd be apart for four years. don't even try to tell me you wouldn't have had an issue with that!" you were caught off guard at her sudden shift of tone, this one much more abrupt and sharp.

"don't try to project your guilt for not telling me into me being the reason why you didn't. that's not fair!" you shot back, alessia only shaking her head with a laugh. "you shouldn't have even been snooping around in the first place!" she snatched the letter off of you with a glare.

"snooping? i can see that offer is signed alessia, were you even going to tell me before you sent it off?" you asked with a hard stare, face falling as guilt flashed across her face momentarily. "you've already sent it." you realized quietly, her head hanging low all the confirmation you needed.

"wow." you breathed out, moving to sit down on the edge of her bed as you tried to come to terms with everything, feeling her sit down a few feet away from you. "when do you leave?" you whispered, feeling her eyes pierce into the side of your head but not having the heart to look up from the floor, the room starting to spin.

"two weeks."

your head did shoot up at that, alessia wincing at the anger, hurt, betrayal and disappointment clear as day in your features. "two fucking weeks. you didn't tell me and you leave in two weeks?" you breathed out, tears welling up in the corner of your eyes.

"i was going to i promise but i just...i thought it would make everything easier if we didn't-" alessia struggled with her words, tripping over herself as her fingers twitched and she rubbed her palms against her sweats.

"make what easier?" you caught on right away to what she meant, the room starting to feel awfully small as your chest tightened. and meeting your eyes alessia knew you knew what she meant. "everything." the blondes own eyes welled up with tears as you wiped at your face with the back of your arm.

"were you even going to tell me?" you asked, scarily calm as you stared her down, watching her wither underneath your piercingly angry gaze. "no." she admitted after a moment, burying her head in her hands, body wracking with quiet sobs as she began to break.

your legs buckled at that and your body fell to her floor with a small thump, your knees tucking into your chest as you curled into a ball. "so you were going to just leave and what? expect me to just...be okay with that?" you asked, unable to even wrap your head around any of this.

"you're going to college here, i'll be over there. it wouldn't have worked for four years and we both deserve to be able to make the best of this next chapter, i thought i was making it easier if we never had to say goodbye." alessia admitted quietly, both of you refusing to look at one another.

"never mind the fact i'm in love with you. i've been your best friend since we were five less, and you were going to just...get on a plane and leave me for four years without even telling me where you were going." you whispered, barely able to get your words out as red hot guilt flooded the blondes body.

"i was trying to make it easier."

"for who alessia? for you? by avoiding having to even tell me anything and just leaving me without a word? you're a fucking coward!" you almost screamed those last four words, chest heaving as you struggled to hold back a sob.

her silence told you everything you needed to as you broke down, your body convulsing as you sobbed into your hands, alessia covering her ears unable to handle the noise, tears rolling down her cheeks leaving a bitter salty taste in her mouth.

"get off me!" you spat out, shoving her off as she moved to sit down next to you, trying to wrap herself around you in a hug. "get off!" you yelled again, voice cracking as she shook her head, holding you firmly.

eventually she let go, collapsing into herself as you stood to your feet, vision blurry with tears as you stumbled around trying to collect your belongings.

"stop!" you sobbed as she hugged you from behind, yanking your bag out of your hands and dropping it on the floor. "don't leave me, please." she begged, voice no louder than a whisper as her face buried itself in your neck.

"i'm not the one leaving." you pushed her away, the force causing her to stumble as she caught herself and managed to stay standing. "you know now. we still have two weeks!" she tried, almost begging now as you scoffed.

"oh so i have two weeks to wait for you to break up with me? lucky me!" you spat venomously, trying to pick up your bag as alessia kicked it away. "we have two weeks we can spend together before i go. please! i made a mistake, a huge mistake. baby please i love you so much but-" her hands balled at your top, holding you against her.

"if you loved me you would have never lied to me about this. you would have told me the moment you even starting thinking about it! we could have talked it out! worked things out together! now i don't have a fucking choice and you don't understand how unfair that is alessia!" you pushed her harder and harder with every sentence until she smacked into the wall, blue eyes welled up with tears.

"baby please don't go! not like this!" she grabbed you again as you tried, wrapping her arms around you as you fought her furiously, hitting her over and over as her body shook with silent sobs but she refused to let go of you, feeling her tears drip down the back of your neck.

"i would have been okay if we were able to talk about this. if i had time to process this, to make plans with you, to talk about what it could have looked like for us and what we'd be when you were there. i would have supported you and this choice if you'd given me the chance." you finally broke free, stumbling away from her as you gestured between the two of you before furiously wiping at your eyes.

"but you didn't and you weren't going to. you're a liar and a coward and i can't believe i wasted so much of my life trying to show you i care for it all to mean nothing to you in the end. if you love me less, if you ever loved me, then you will do as you planned. you will get on that plane and you will stay out of my life. you're not my girlfriend, not even a friend would do what you just did to me." you wanted to say more, you wished you could find the words, you wished you could hit her again and scream that you hated her and mean every single word you just said to her.

but you didn't, you couldn't, you wished you could, it would have made it all easier.

you didn't allow her the luxury of a response, far too afraid of how easy it may have been for her to talk her way out of this, to lull you into a false sense of safety and security with sweet words and gentle intimate touches. to shower you with affection and quality time and praise, only to rip the rug right out from under you in just two weeks time.

so you left her before she could leave you, and you didn't turn once to look back.

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part six

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