#i need to go shower n rest tho bc its later n i have to wake up early tomorrow plus my back is KILLING me blegh
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Hi hi! I just saw your dazai headcannons and i just came from a crying session by watching violet evergarden (im excited for the new movie tho) but could you do headcannons for chuuya, dazai and maybe one of your preferred character like they come home to you crying or maybe even sobbing at a movie and at first they were panicked when they heard you cry from outside and the rest is up to you. I hope you have a good day today and thank you! Also if i requested for too much please just ignore it-
You asked so you shall receive. I’m actually very in love with this idea! Also I chose Ranpo as the third character bc I love him so much
(I feel your pain with violet evergarden)
Osamu Dazai
You had just finished watching possibly one of the saddest movies of all time
You figured you’d probably shed a few tears here and there but by the end you were SOBBING
Like uncontrollably sobbing
You had tissues piled around you and your eyes were red from a mix of rubbing them and tears pouring out of them
Unbeknownst to you Dazai was on his way home from the Agency
He was in a unusually happy mood, probably because he had other things on his mind, if you know what I mean...
But he stopped dead in his tracks as soon as he heard noises coming from the other side of the door
He could tell you were crying, but was it because someone had broken in and tried to hurt you? Or because you had fallen and hurt yourself?
Immediately he rushes in through the door, full badass mode, prepared to kill someone if it comes down to it.
But when he sees you, sitting on the couch, vulnerable and a crying mess his entire demeanor changes in an instant
Suddenly he goes from “who hurt my baby” to “Oh, my belladonna whats wrong?”
You explain to him why you were crying and he laughs only because he thinks its adorable
“I-I didn’t think I was go-going to cry but wh-when they separated at-at the end, I JUST COULDN’T T-TAKE IT.”
He would hold you close to his chest and stroke your hair, pecking small kisses on top of your hair until you stopped crying
He makes you a cup of tea and cleans up after you
He cuddles with you on the couch while you two watch something happier to cheer you up
Every few minutes he’s telling you how much he loves you and giving you lots of kisses
You end up falling asleep in his arms which is absolutely the cutest thing ever to him
He ends up carrying you to bed, trying his best not to wake you up
Chuuya Nakahara
You didn’t think it was even humanly possible to cry as much as you were right now
it just seemed like no matter how hard your tried the tears wouldn’t stop coming
Of course Chuuya came home at the worst time
He didn’t even hesitate when he heard you sobbing through the other side of the door
He rushed in so quickly he probably could’ve broken down the door if he wanted to
“Y/N! Whats wrong? Who hurt you? Why are you crying so much? Blink twice if your in danger!”
You didn’t say anything
You managed to look up at him through your blurry vison but you just kept crying
Once he actually takes a second to look around, he realizes what's going on
Of course he rushes over to you quickly, wraps his trench coat around you and holds you close to him and all of his 5′3 self
You start to calm down but your breathing is still very shaky
Even though you aren’t hurt he can’t stand to see you cry the way you are
“I know I-Its dumb to cry over a m-movie, but It-its the way that h-he died!”
He reassures you that its not stupid
“Sweetie, its not dumb. It’s okay to cry over it”
He’s actually a big softie so he does start to cry a little when you explain the movie to him
He would stop at nothing to protect you even you aren’t psychically hurt
He’ll go full out mom mode on you
Lots of kisses because he claims that “kisses can fix any problem, even the small ones”
Gets you anything you want or need
Encourages you to drink wine because he “knows it will instantly make you feel better”
He won’t leave your side unless he absolutely has to
He makes sure to remind you of how much you mean to him and how much he absolutely loves you every few minutes
Ranpo Edogawa
He’s Yokohamas greatest detective, so of course he already knew you were going to be crying your eyes out to a sad movie when he got home
Fully prepared for the situation, he made a stop at the convivence store beforehand
He picked up lots of snacks
Lots of candy
He made sure he got the ones he knew you especially liked
He even got you flowers too, just because he knew how much it always made you smile when you received them from him
Of course, because he already knows the situation, he doesn’t come bursting through the door
Instead he casually walks in, fully expecting to see you crying
But he stopped dead in his tracks when he saw just how much you were crying
It broke his heart to see you that sad
He drops everything and comes running into your arms
Even though it should probably be the other way around
“Y/N! Please don’t cry! I’m here now, its okay!”
He immediately showers you with lots of kisses all over your face
He buries his face into your neck once he’s done and you two just sit there in a comfortable silence for a few moments wrapped in each other arms
All of the sudden he gets up
“I almost forgot! I brought you home surprises! Here look, its a little teddy bear. See? Look how happy he is”
He’s so adorable, you love him so much
Later while you two are cuddling you ask him “Ranpo, I’m sure you already knew I was going to be crying once you got home, so why did you seem so surprised?”
He just kind of looks at you for a moment
“Well, as great as a detective as I am, not even I can always see how things are exactly going to play out.”
You hum in response and he pecks your lips
#bsd#bsd x reader#bungo stary dogs#bungo stray dogs x reader#dazai osamu#dazai x reader#dazai osamu x reader#dazai headcannons#chuuya nakahara#chuuya x reader'#chuuya fluff#chuuya headcannons#ranpo#ranpo edogawa#ranpo x reader#ranpo bsd
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i followed u for spop and have no idea what the rest of this stuff is but i asked my little brother who dream was bc i don't still really understand what minecraft youtube is (how do they stream it??? isn't it just blocks????) and he made this face EXACTLY "😳" so i guess my question is... is dream cute? i'm not attracted to men but i guess my little brother might be and i want to know if he has good taste
LMAOOOOO oh god. this is so funny. i love this.
short answer: yes. dream is a faceless YouTuber so technically no one “knows if he’s cute/hot” but he is. i’ll explain that later. is ur brother attracted to men? ask him if he likes georgenotfound. if he says yes ask him to explain. tbh no matter what explanation he gives theres a 40% chance he’s attracted to men. which is a really low percentage. so what u should REALLY ask him is “do u like dream or george better” and if he says “george” this statistic increases to 95%. if he says dream there’s still a chance he’s into men he’s just not into pretty men that boss u around. or he thinks confidence n skill is sexy or something. or– never mind. i won’t elaborate. he could also be VERY casually into their content so like i really do not know. this is getting messy. anyway yes if he knows who dream is he 99% knows who george is btw. they do everything together
(side note: did u ask ur brother if he likes dream/is a fan of dream? bc i feel like that’s different from just Knowing who dream is. if he starts going “UM NO HE TOTALLY CHEATED HIS SPEEDRUNS–“ then ur brother is the straightest person i have ever met in my life. if he doesn’t say that then it’s okay ❤️)
long answer:
for a rundown on what ‘mcyt’ and dream smp is click here
(jk this answer isn’t actually going to be long. i wrote most of this like 2 days ago n forgot. i’m out of steam now probably but lets give this a go)
dream is endearing. he’s sweet and funny and he just wants to make everyone happy. he’s nice and kind to people and is nice and kind even when people are obscenely rude or mean to him. he tries to make people change their minds about it instead (tbh…. adhd. it’s the rsd n just. god what a mood) and he approaches things with a lot of compassion and like. he has grown a lot as a person over the last half year or so and he’s made himself LESS and LESS cynical somehow? which is the opposite of what u would expect when someone gets really big, especially as big as he’s gotten. n he’s only 21 (like me!) but he’s shown so much emotional maturity compared to people way older than him. his laugh is both funny (the WHEEZE) and also really beautiful at the same time. he wears his heart on his sleeve and LOVES so much and so big and he tells his friends that he loves them w zero hesitation. he wants to shower his friends w love n gifts n share his success w them. he’ll appear on their streams n videos to the point where he doesn’t stream as much, to the point that he never streams his perspective on dream smp anymore because he wants the others to get the views. dream is also like… playfully confident? idk just something about his Attitude and the way he Talks it’s like. yeah ur a sexy person. when he taunts n says Come Get Me or Oh Come On Now or some other shit its like. i hate u. kinda hot tho but that’s precisely why i hate u. mmm n honestly just his voice in general. idk what the fuck it is. he doesn’t even NEED a hot voice but his voice?? something about it is just weirdly smooth. idk. some people have described it as caramel. i don’t KNOW ok i just love it when he talks. i hate him. he’s good :) that’s it I’m gonna stop now bye
#ask#mcyt#dreamwastaken#dream smp#this ask SENT me i love u anon#i hope ur brother is a mlm :)#Anonymous
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I watched Joker tonight and typed out my thoughts as they occurred to me. Unedited; typos are guaranteed. I did this a few months ago and really enjoyed looking back at my thought process and I wanted to do it again so that I can look back and know that what I feel is real and true in my darkest times.
You're welcome to skip this; it's under a cut for ease of doing so. Warnings for occasional sexual comment lmao. There’s no self shipping in this, I don’t think.
word count: 2, 575.
I’M SOBBING and I’ve only just pressed play.
Heart squeeze Chest much ow
THERE HE IS
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Nooooo baby omg don’t pretend - let yourself hurt if it hurts. Don’t pretend.
Carnival Carnival Carnivalllllllll 😍😍😍😍😍
I am a Simp for one clown and his name is Carnival
Someone help him, I????
That sign hit Arthur as hard as my love for him did ksksksk
MY EYES BE LEAKIN💔💔💔💔💔
bb nooooo
Oh honey let me kiss those bruises and replace the marks of violence with love, hm? You’re safe with me.
Breathe, my love. Don’t fight the laughter. Let it out, let yourself go.
Screams into a pillow because????? much sad must kiss
“have you been keeping up with your journal?” LIKE HE HAS TIME
oHHHHH boi’s close to losing his shit
Do it, Artie. Give ‘em hell.
“I think I did” YOU TELL HER!!💖💖💖
I want to be his cigarette. Where’s Satan??? I got a new deal for my blackened soul which he took at half price😂😂😂😂
I’d have my hand between the door and his head so fuckin fast I swear
“I just don’t wanna feel so bad anymore” yep SAME
ohhhh peekaboo🥺🥺🥺
this makes me giggle ksksksk i watch this scene when i feel sad bc it always makes me happy for the time it’s on
he’s so good with kids; he doesn’t have to try and think about what’s funny, he just does it, he’s himself and it works
FUCK OFF LADY CAN’T YOU SEE HE’S STRUGGLING????
give
him
back
his
card
casually wrinkling my nose against tears lmao
ohhh the way he looks up at those stairs from the bottom
i can feel his exhaustion
me too, my love
step step step step
god i wanna get him the fuck outta gotham
and into my arms and a soft, warm blanket
“eat. you need to eat” LITERALLY WHAT I TELL MYSELF EVERY DAY IN HIS VOICE BC OTHERWISE I JUST WOULDNT EAT???? I’m losing so much weight asdfghjk its not enough tho
SUPAH RATS
Did Arthur come up w that joke or was it actually a Murray joke????
HIS VOICE IS SO SOFT IM CRY??🥺🥺🥺🥺
“I WAS PUT HERE TO SPREAD JOY AND LAUGHTER”
YOU DO BABY, YOU DO!!!! EVERY FUCKING DAY!!!!
go deepthroat a cactus randall - youre already a bit of a prick so🙃🙃🙃
“THE GUYS THINNK YOU’RE A FREAK BUT I LIKE YOU”
HOYT. YOU CAN GO SIT ON A CACTUS TOO
FUCK OFF
😡😡😡😡
“WHY WOULD ANYONE STEAL A SIGN”//”WHY DOES ANYONE DO ANYTIHNG?” HOYT YOU’RE SO FUCKING ILLOGICAL HERE IM????? ERIKA DOES NOT (ALSO WILL NOT LMAO IM A STUBBORN BIITCH) COMPUTE
Can arthur fuck me like he pounds the trash/????🥵🥵👀
those dark curls.... that crooked tooth... must kiss.🥺🥺🥺
pennys casual cruelty makes me so fucking angry
foreshadowingggggg ~ *JAZZ HANDS*
ugh the way he dances with that gun im👀🥵🥵🥵
he enjoys the power of it and his breathing gets deeper asdfghjk
clumsy baby omggggg i just COOED 🥺🥺🥺🥺
okay maybe im stupid but i genuinely dont understand this “senior who needs to graduate” skit i’m??? how is being an intro to western civ student funny im???? someone explain???
but also dont bc fuck that guy lmao arthur’s hilarious
true millenial humour (and brit humour lmao we’re dark asf)
THE WAY ARTIE TWIRLS HIS FINGERS AROUND HIS HAIR AND DANCES IN HIS SEAT IM???🥺🥺🥺
wanna curl up on his lap at night when hes writing and go to sleep with a
blanket around our bodies🥺🥺🥺🥺
when arthur wears a shirt at home you KNOW it’s a daydream
THAT CROOKED TOOTH IM WANT KISS.
WAIT IS IT CALLED STAND UP COMEDY BC YOU STAND UP... AND ITS COMEDY???
23 FUCKING YEARS, PEOPLE... TO REALISE THAT🙄
WHEN CARNIVAL CAME ON SCREEN I NTHE HOSPITAL I MADE A PORNOGRAPHIC NOISE LMAO I LOVE HIM SO MUCH
IF YOURE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT, SHOOT MURRAY
WOOPS WRONG LYRICS
😂
“doctor of laughter”🥺🥺🥺🥺
doctor i have a case of the Big Sad can you... do an exam? 😉😏
NO BB DONT BEAT YOUR HEAD UP THERES PRECIOUS CARGO IN THERE
in what world does chucking cold greasy chips in a girls hair being “nice”???
lmao fuck these guys
ohhh honey breathe. dont fight it, my love, just breathe.
my heart’s breaking for you, you sweet thing🥺🥺🥺
i love you so so so so so so so much ugh you’re an actual fucking angel
just breathe darling
i need to get you a cup of tea with honey in it, your throat must be so sore
ohhhh baby im so sorry
i’d take every single punch if i could
i’d die for you
i wish i could protect you
i wish i could look after you
and take all those hits
and kill those guys for you
im so sorry
sobbingggg
YES GOOD MAN THANK YOUUU
KILL THOSE ASSHOLES LMAO DESERVED IT
yeah i have a grey morality... im similar to deadpool in that way tbh
carnival comin’ to kill your insecurities
8 bullets in a 6 chamber???? mm-hm
DONT FORGET YOUR BAG THATS EVIDENCE
AND THE WIG
RUN BABY RUNNNNNNN
GO GO GO GOOOOOOOOOOOO
RUN LIKE THE WIND BULLSEYE
THE SOUND OF HIS FEET SLAPPING THE PAVEMENT IM👀
OOOOOH JOKER’S WAKIN’ UUUUUUP
fuck he’s so hypnotic
the way he runs his hand down his lower stomach asdfghj🥵
must kiss the inner tendons on his wrists and lick the blood off his face
must kiss
he moves like water
fuck hes so fluid
bathroom scene = the scene in which my heart and vagina clench at the same time
im WANT
T POSEEEEEEEE
“i still owe you for that, dont i?”
PUNCH OUT IS MY FAVOURITE THING E V E R
D O N T S M I LE
UGH I FUCKING HATE being told to smile if i don’t fucking want to so BIG mood
PLEASE SHUSH ME THE WAY YOU JUST SHUSHED PENNY IM???
but also dont lmao bc i’ll think you’re mad at me and i’ll hide in the bedroom for the rest of the day lmao i’m sensitive✨✨✨
i wanna sit on his lap and still his bouncing knees
“thats not funny”
fuck off penny yes it is
I JUST CHOKED ON MY COFFEE IM???
“but i do” god the P O W E R
ugh that fucking sexist piece of shit comedian can choke “women look at sex like buying a car” 🤢🤮🤢🤢🤮
chauvinistic pigs can die thanks
his lil trip upstage im cry🥺🥺🥺
ohhh baby. just breathe, darling. it’s okay to be scared. dont fight it. just breathe.
he and i both cover our mouths when we laugh/smile in the exact same way and it makes me feel closer to him
how can they think hes laughing at himself when hes literally gagging????
people only see what they wanna
the Penny imitation is👌👌👌
s m i l e
i remember when i came home from seeing this for the first time, i got home and dropped to my knees to cry in the bathroom. it was such an emotional release and so much love and i played smile to try to make myself smile but i only made myself cry harder lmaooooo ~
smile and thats life are my go-to songs if i gotta cheer tf up
danger sign = neither works
he looks so soft after his “date”🥺🥺🥺
“thats life” yeah but murray you dont even leave the studio so how do you know????
ngl arthur’s anger scares me.
anyone so much as raise their voice at me and i’ll cry really bad and i will shut myself away for the rest of the day and quiet anger terrifies me so his banging abt in the kitchen would freak me tf out😲
angry bb😭
he controls his anger so fast though omgggg ~
that soft please sends me
idk where it sends me lmao
down below probably
BARE FACED CARNIVAL OMG THIS SCENE IS SO CUTE
I LOVE THE MATCHING COLOURS ON ARTHUR AND BRUCE TOO ???
okay but the implication that arthur always carries a clown nose on him is🥺🥺🥺
hes such a good clown im?????
lmao im enjoying the show more than bruce is skskskk
arthur’s lil chuckle makes me🥺
his HUMMING im??? soft?????
his brows are so strong and dark omggg ~ he’s so beautiful
OKAY i’ll be honest i’ve seen this alfred/bruce scene and the thomas bathroom scene later on and the penny flashback scene a 100 times and i still dont fucking understand what did or didnt happen regarding arthur’s parentage im????
ive seen interpretations to say he is thomas’ son and some to say he isnt and i still cant decide so? im stupid i guess 🙃
“a clown thing?” the s a s s
“it’s exit only” yeah so’s my ass🙃
if i was there in the hospital room i woulda turned that tv off as soon as i realised what clip was gonna play
murray’s cruelty is d i s g u s t i n g
lmao hes an asshole
arthurs lil clap from joyyyyy ~ 🥺🥺🥺
did i say murray???
i meant m u r r a t
🙃🙃🙃
sneaky baby
wayne hall either has super bad security or arthurs v quick on his feet
🤔🤔🤔🤔
he looks so good in red omggg ~
f o r e s h a d o w i n g
arthurs smile when hes watching chaplin is how he smiles when we all gush to each other abt him and ourselves!!!
hes so cuuuuuute🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰
“told me what”
ohhhh honey🥺🥺 im so sorry. “crazy” is a trigger word for arthur; it made him start laughing in the bathroom with thomas
“touch my son again ill fucking kill you” yeah?? touch my arthur again and i’ll fucking kill you🙃🙃🙃🙃
^^^ that ones a joke do not come at me
the clerk in arkham was nice to arthur - he, gary and sophie are the good gothamites.
none of it was enough to stop his descent into joker, though, and i’d even say it was too late right at the beginning of the film, too...
his sock puppet thingy “they cut all those” is such a Joker thing to doooo ~
the way arthur’s laughing in the hall at arkham turns into sobbing is gut-wrenching omg the poor thing😭
i wanna hug him and protect him and help him to process this in a healthy way
sweetheart, if i could take all of your pain and put it onto me... i so would. i’d do it in a heartbeat.
i wanna get you into a hot shower, make you some food and sit and listen to you. we can either sit in silence or you can talk to me, my love, and you will be heard and understood and loved.
“i had a bad day”
IT’S OKAY I DIDNT NEED MY HEART ANYWAY OMG YOU POOR SWEET INNOCENT THING IM LOVE YOU🥺💔
THAT ENTIRE LATE NIGHT SCENE LAUGH/SOBBING GOT ME -
💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔
i just wanna hold you and protect you and help you and love you
I’m so fucking sorry, darling. i wish i could take it all away from you
“i havent been happy one minute of my entire fucking life”
NO ONE SHOULD LOOK THAT ANGELIC AFTER COMMITING MATRICIDE IM????
get
that
fucking
gun
away
from
your
face
boi dont test me ill fucking go feral or - no, tell you what, i’ll point the gun at me and see how you like it
im looking respectfully at the green speckled undies scene....👀👀👀
“coming” 😏😏😏
“my mum died im celebrating” and “i stopped taking my medication” and you STILL stayed in the apartment with Arthur????? dudes those are 🚨🚨🚨 signs
woe betide anyone who underestimates arthur fleck lmaoooo
randalls death scene makes me laugh every time omg i feel so vindictive
get WRECKED
i wanna lick the blood off his face. i really want to
ngl i think i have a blood kink...
“dont look just go” ME WITH MY ACNE WHEN I SEE IT IN THE MIRROR 😂😂😂😂
JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKER
ASDFGHJKL
J
O
K
E
R
ERIKA.EXE HAS STOPPED WORKING
JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERRRRRR
😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 MY BABY MY MAN OMG THERE HE IS IM CRY???????😭🥺😭🥺😭🥺
my mind is literally blank rn im just staring and crying and smiling so hard my face hurts????? im love him so so so so much
sweet thing’s so used to pain he gets HIT BY A CAR AND KEEPS GOING????
I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU
hghhhhhhhhhhhhhh
euirrrrrrgkjbgkfbirsghigrbugr
*incoherent keyboardsmash to portray utter love*
ohhh baby no dont cry. oh honey😭 i wanna sit on your lap and kiss your tears away
“i love dr sally”
you have a WIFE at home
“DO YOU REMEMBER?” THAT WAS YOUR CUE TO APOLOGISE LMAO GET FUCKED MURRAT
he’s so CUTE
omgggg ~
my hearts gonna give out its SQUEEZING SO HARD IT HURTS
YOU MOCK THEM, BABY!!! THEY GOT IT COMING
“i wanna get it right” hes so passionate
my comments have deceased in number bc im just too starstruck and in love to even think clearly lmao
jokers all i know rn and this is the most peaceful ive felt in WEEKS
im sobbing
ugh fuck this hurts so BAD
youre speaking the truth, darling. im so so proud of you and i love you so much
“THEY COULDNT CARRY A TUNE TO SAVE THEIR LIVES” LMAO INSIDE JOKESSS
literally sobbing right now ugh what the fuck youre in so much pain and in the middle of a breakdown and no one saw you
ugh baby im so sorry, you deserve so much better
you tried so hard and you were gonna fall no matter what
IN THE WHITE ROOM
“hi” baby they cant hear you but im COOING 🥺🥺🥺🥺
you’re so fucking cute
say the word and ill burn gotham to the fucking ground for you
i wanna sit atop that car and cradle your head in my lap and wipe the blood off your face and help you stand up and be there for you and and and😭😭😭😭😭😭 i love you so so so much.
i’d be so much worse off without you in my life. you brought a splash of colour which has never dimmed or faded. it never will.
b l o o d s m i l e
=
im wearing my inside on the outside now and it still hurts
angel💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔
i see you and your pain. i love you.
i see you, angel.
his genuine laughter is🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
that cute lil “ksksks” he does im🥺🥺🥺
i always laugh with him omg the two of us are laughing together ugh its the closest i will ever get to sharing in his joy
t h a t ‘s l i f e
i love the hallway daaaaaaaaaaaaaance ~
them hips dont lie😉😉😉
i love you i love you i love you i love you omg the sun’s like a halo ugh i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you im singing along to thats life while i type out how much i love you at 220am lmaooooo ~
i l o v e y o u
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Me.trocon 2017 Day 1
This is a diary for future me bc i like to keep my important memories preserved to read abt later n stuff! uh.. feel free to read if ya want i guess or ignore but it’s just me in-depth talkin abt what i did today n what happened to me, negative n positive! [peace sign] Cosplayed: Tsuka.sa Suou in his summer uniform
okay so i got mcdonalds for brunch at like 1 after i left my house and dad dropped me off to go get registered and all and after leaving registration to go get myself a Schedule, someone stopped me and said “oh my god can i take a pic of you?!” and i was so surprised that someone recognized who i was but i said sureso they pulled out their phone and they had a ku.ro k/iryu phonecase and i was like “!! KURO !!” and i talked w them (they were cosplaying the human lady from the ma.id dragon anime) and they had sooo many en.stars charms on their phone and i was like “oh my god you’re into en.stars” and i asked if they were doing okay in the event and they said their cards were too weak and that they only had 1 five star and i was like dude that sucks! but i had to rush to the UT panel so i said bye to them and they said they were gonna be shinkai on sunday so i’m looking forward to that!
so i went to the UT panel and things were kinda annoying bc some alt. au sans kept asking lots of questions and making commentary tly loudly and sometimes answering questions like they were part of the panel?? i think even the panelists were kinda annoyed of her... and she’d be like “aww un.dyne u didnt do my dare [mutter] but u did theirs!!” but i dont hav much to say abt this panel tbh
so i went to the bl.ack but/ler panel and apparently the original panelists didnt come so a group of bl.ack butler cosplayers (a ciel, seb, alois, and grell) along w two random girls and a Shiro ran the panel but usually the audience was talking over them bc everyone was kind of joking around and thngs were more chatoic and casual than a normal panel but i talked to the pidge abt random stuff and we talked abt their wig (which they took off bc it was itchy lol) and how we both didnt sleep much last night and we kinda became friends n talked a bit
and then i left the BB panel and had a LOT of freetime so i walked around the dealers room/artist alley (mostly in search of ES merch) and i found a rei cosplayer and i was like “wow i like your UNDEAD itabag- wait ur cosplaying rei arent you?” and they were like “yea, casual rei haha” and i was like “HOLY FUC can i take ur pic......” and we talked abt en.stars for a sec n i was like “im cosplayin tsukasa!” n they were like “i See that” and i told them i was on the hunt for ES merch and they pointed me in the direction of the other side of the dealers room and said there was an idol table that had a box/boxes full of ES merch and the table was blaring idol music so it was Noticable and i was like “HOLY SHIT im gonna go get some charms thnk u” and had i not noticed that the rei n their friend seemed to be semi-busy i probably wouldve tried to talk abt ES w them for a while aa...
SO ANYWAY i found the idol table and there were 3 lil boxes of ES charms/buttons/etc and a box of i/7 charms/buttons/etc so i looked thru them and ALL THE STUFF WAS SO CUTE KRHNRGHB... but it took me abt an hour to look thru everything and pick out a natsume keychain and a mika christmas keychain but while i was there i was like.. bouncing to the loud idol music (they didnt play en.stars music but there was id.olmaster music i think and LL music) and the girl from earlier that took my pic (erin is her name i believe) and her friend and their other friend (?) who was umi came up to me and said hi again and looked at the charms (erin said she got a shu button and a lot of kuro merch tho, and she spent most of her money for the day lol) and i talked to them abt the things in the boxes and en.stars like which boys we liked or not (erin said she found ritsu annoying bc i showed her a ritsu keychain) and i gave erin and her friend lollipops and eventually left (the booth had 3 ES plushies and the 1st ES artbook w the cgs and va comments in it btw but i didt get those) and im debating going back to that table for a chiaki item or midori item.. maybe bc im tryna save up for a pillow or plushie i rly want
so i went back downstairs and saw the ann i first spotted near registration when i got inand i was like “oh!” but i sat down near them bc playing ES and putting my charms on my bag was more important and a lance asked me if i was yuki from tsu.ritama and i was like “nope! En.semble stars” and the shiro was like “OHH!!” and i asked the shiro n matt (they looked like matt but it might hav been a different character) if they were into en.stars and they said no sbut the matt said “all i kno is that eichi is Bad” and i was like “KJRGNRB YEA.. HES EVIL HES BAD YANNO THAT ;BABY BOY. EVIL.’ MEME? HES THE EVIL PART” and the lance kept laughing and i was like “he messed w ppl and kinda maybe emotionally abused someone hes No Good >:0″ but i told em that en.stars has a translation n stuff and then a serena helped me put my natsume on my bag
and before i left i wanted a pic of the ann and akira but then i noticed there was a Makoto so i wanted to take their pic but after i did the makoto was like “YOURE COSPLAYING FROM EN.STARS ARENT YOU...” n i said yes and they squealed and said they were into ES and i hugged them and they showed me their mao itabag and apparently the ann and akira were into ES as well so we all laughed abt ES and i learned that makoto hates rei bc i said reis one of my best boys n makoto’s friend said she liked rei too and makoto groaned and i said “he’s hot!” and maggie (the friend) was like “yea!” and akira’s fav waskeito n he was like “i’d hug him. i’d kiss him. i’d spicy w him” and they were like “THOSE R GOOD UR VALID” when i said chiaki n ryu.seitai were my favs but apparently they had friends who loved chiaki too bc the akira mentioned it and we all laughed for a sec and makoto and akira said they were gonna be the tori n eichi at the en.stars panel on satudrday and i screeched and ann called over a DAN!akira she spotted (i took a pic of him earlier) and so he joined our lil hangout group and we all spotted a Joker akira so ann was like “...if i yell ‘akira’ ya think hell come over here” so i was like “let’s all yell it on 3″ so ann, DAN akira and i all yelled “AKIRA!!!” in unison and he came over and took some pics w the others n took a pic of me and i took a pic of him then he left but the DAN akira stayed and i gav makoto, ann, and DAN akira lollipops and we all hung out and ann and the umi from earlier (who was apparently their friend) danced to LL songs bc ann started dancing to em for us and before that the akira and makoto left and eventually the akira left until it was just ann, umi, and i w them dancing and i spotted my irl friend lynds so i said hi bc she was playing cards w her friendgroup then i said goodbye to ann and umi bc i wanted to find the wataru they mentioned they saw (erin mentioned it earlier too)
and so i walked around 4 a minute b4 the next UT panel and didnt find the wataru but oh well so i went to the 2nd UT panel and it was still p boring and the annoying chick from earlier was still there and some girl behind me was loud n had a handclapper toy they kept using and i hated it but w/e so after i left that, i wandered around a bit and eventually went to the phantomhive ball and mad.ame red (who was an ichigo earlier in the day who helped the ppl do improv for the BB panel for a sec b4 they had to leave) saw me and we kept talking and i was like “is this.. an actual ball or a Panel” and they said a ball so i was like “oh god” but they were rly sweet to me and tightened my tie and we talked abt our previous cons and who we’re gonna cosplay tomorrow and i also talked w their un.dertaker until the doors to the panel opened but un.dertaker n stood in the corner n i didnt wanna slowdance so i called dad to pick me up, wandered around the con n played ES, then left at like 10 pm!
#THIS IS.. LONG IF UR ON MOBILE#i need to go shower n rest tho bc its later n i have to wake up early tomorrow plus my back is KILLING me blegh#diary
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baekhyun as a bf
it wasn’t supposed to be this big tbh
you can tell by the fucker’s face, he is annoying af
k seriously tho
even though byun is all smiles and pranks he definitely seems like a serious person on the personal side
constantly asking himself if it’s the right thing to do putting u in such a historically brutal position such as dating an idol
you having to reassure him way too often that it was your decision to make, not his
“sweetie i’m here because i want to stop going off” “cool but like are you su-” “dude i swEAR TO GOD”
it’s not something he likes thinking it just happens okay he’s worried b patient to the babee
since his last relationship didn’t end up very well, he would probably take mONTHS to actually claim you as his girlfriend
seriously tho i fume just thinking about that time
it happened on a friday night when he was playing on the pc, chanyeol was calling and babyboi was like “srry cant talk rn exchanging breaths with my girl”
you were scrunching your nose for a sec but them you realized what he said and were like !!!!
him enjoying the fact his words got you so flustered and playing it cool like chill out dude as if you didn’t know we were dating by now
????????? in fact ou were so surprised bcs u didn’t even know the boys knew abt ur existence
“like... they KNOW??????”
“of cOURSE they know junmyeon would kick my ass if i didn’t explain to him why i missed our dinner last night”
you guys are so comfortable with the fact your relationship ain’t official you decided at the same night thisbis how you prefered to stay like
he’s not okay with going public after what happened in the past and you agree and support his desire to keep it private
i could write a whole essay dissing saesangs
that doesn’t mean he won’t hang out with you
after all, you’ve been friends for ages now
and the boys know abt u
chanyeol keeps biting byun’s butt but you’re okay with that
was there any other option? ofc not
talking about ass
he’s one
honestly such a tease
always finding a way to make u flustered
“babe look at me” “what” “i love you” “god i love you too” “and your ass looks amazing today” “leave me alone”
always slaps your butt
doesn’t matter the context
sexual or not
he loves him some butt
lol dates
like literally you sit there and spend the night playing and eating together
every lol date is a different dish ordered
since you gotta keep it low profile
might as well do it right
he’s an observer
constantly stops what he’s doing to admire you
sometimes you’re like watching a movie or idk brushing ur teeth
he stands there in the door frame all dumbfounded burning loveholes into your skull
you’re like ...stop it
he’s like . no
he’s so emotional i’m not even exaggerating
keeps joking around when he’s around people and everybody seems to think he’s a dork who just can’t stop talking nonsense
(which he is)
but when you guys are alone
oh boy
he’s so sensible
literally writes on post-its and places it around your apartment before he leaves for practice on mornings
not all of them are cute tho
once your friend was like “hey y/n idcwho’s dicking you down but i think the person got the feels”
you completely forgot to take off the “your taste already left my mouth. dinner tonight at 8 and i’ll be eating twice” post-it
like
he literally put it in your refrigerator’s door
you legit wanted to die
but then on other days it’s like
“i promised, throughout my whole life, this heart belongs to you.”
honestly so intense
when you guys argue it’s like a conquest to see who can act more like a spoiled kid
but basically go off with your frustrations and then one of u ends up cooling off in the shower
later either you or him get in there too asking if the other is feeling better
tbh not that often do u guys fight
most of the times is like
“okay,,, this is unnecessary” “yeah screw it”
but sometimes it gets really heated
and you’re both frustrated
straightforward speaking, you guys have sex
very
rough
sex
he’s a switch k let’s be real
loves making you beg
loves begging for you
not the type to degrade or hurt you or anything
like he’s a light dom
and by that i mean he will pound in you rough and slow until you’re begging him to let you cum but keeps kissing your flushed cheeks and tightly intertwining your hands as he lovingly whispers “you fucking love those type of fights don’t you”
loves LOVES being blindfolded
lowkey a freak but moderately
absolutely loves it when he ties you up and makes you say exactly what you want
will always stuck two or three fingers in so you have a hard time speaking
as i was saying, the absolute worst
“baekhyun... please-“ “fucking say it” “please... baby... fuck me” “hard nut”
is shamelessly vocal
groans
whimpers
desperate moans
aftercare baekhyun is a look
his hair all disheveled, dazed eyes and flushed lips
yk that look from the city lights photoshoot with his glossy skin and damp hair
yeah
he loves you so much and seeing you all blissed out after sex makes him, curiously, very very soft
everything you guys said during the argument is quickly forgotten as you exchange a few sorry’s and deep kisses in between
loves feeling your skin against his as he embraces your shoulders hugging you to his chest
you leave pecks on the scratchings your nails did on his skin and he just lays there all fucked out and smiles like 💕💞💓💘💘💖💗💞💓💗💕💝💘💖💕💞💓💗💗💞💖💘💞💘💖
and he’s horny again
it’s not like he’s a teenager he just absolutely loves being this intimate to you
and then you have a bath together bcs sticky
loves making coffee like at 6am to you so he can wake you up and have breakfast together
the type to wake you in this worst way possible
he rips the sheets off of you
regardless of how cold it is at that hour
and jumps over
“wake up egg”
as you guys head to the kitchen he sits you on his lap and feeds you :(
his arms around your waist and keeps leaving tiny pecks on your cheeks as he rests his cheek on your back and heavily sighs
“ya your breath stinks”
“you stink dummy”
sings ballads out of the blue
you’re like reading or smth
and he’s like
appado gWAENCHANHA
“shut it or i’ll rip off your chords with my bare hands”
“i dare you”
you actually made out after you chased him around the couch
so annoyingly dense
like you were taking your clothes off
his lips on your neck
and then he’s like
“btw my mother wants to meet you”
you literally froze
bra slipping off your shoulders
“????? you mother kNOWS?????”
“ofc she knows she’s my mother wtf”
“!!!!!!!!!BAEKHYUN”
doesn’t understand the concept of Time And Place
once you were on the bathtub massaging his feet after hours of practice and he was like yo ever thought about kids
i ran out of reactions so basically you cursed at him for five minutes
he was like 🥺🥺 just saying srry
it took you more five to explain to him it wasn’t that you hated kids you just thought it was something to talk about on another time
like
five years another time
maybe ten
he was like k we can have a dog
and now you have a dog together along with mongryong
a cutie called jinx
don’t ask
fucking nerd
you were like
she’s new so treat her as kindly as mongryong
baekhyun is a pain in the ass but in a matter of hours he was like
i bought the same clothes for them
you rolled your eyes but silently got the heart eyes bcs cute
loves watching you dressing yourself
especially for your low profile dates
“hm no too hard to take off”
“...a monochromatic two piece with a zipper in the skirt?”
“my point exactly”
tbh he Is kinda horny
but that’s bcs he’s mad for you
loves it when you style his hair
“baekhyun can’t you stand still for like two minutes” “oh sorry”
you’re standing there, focused on the task
30 secs on it and his hands are already caressing your tummy
you’re like stop i’m bUSY
he’s like no one’s stopping you
but keeps tickling you
idk he really treasures those tiny little details in the moments you spend together
everything is important to him
doesn’t mean he’s like insanely needy of your attention
no you’re two individuals who have their own lives and schedules
he keeps it cool but yeah he’s bananas for you
sorry his words
everything is so domestic with him
and so good
he’s been through a lot throughout the years and this relationship is the calmness he needed
and he’s the fun and lightness you needed after spending so much time trying and acting like a “grownup”
baekhyun brings back the teenager in you
but in a good way
you complete each other so well sigh
cuz you’re like all responsible and shit
he loves the juxtaposition
so do you
idk it feels right
you love like teenagers but live like adults
also his words
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Hey so I saw you mention top surgery and was curious. I was supposed to be having top surgery this summer but that’s postponed. I was curious how that went with chronic pain? I’m scared about the surgical binder with my fibro and back pain. Any advice or info would be greatly appreciated!! (You can answer privately if you prefer)
ive actually been meaning to write up a big post on this pretty much since i had top surgery but still haven't got around to it yet so I'm happy to talk about it lol. ill go over stuff now n still aim to do a more in depth post later when im on my laptop (but writing this now bc i tend to forget everything haha). ill stick to the more fibro / chronic illness specific stuff & stuff i wasnt expecting rather than rehashing everything. apologies im on mobile so i cant put this under a cut
firstly, im sorry ur surgery got postponed! i know that must be gutting, so i hope it gets rescheduled asap & the time until then passes easily for u ❤️
I had double incision with free nipple grafts on the 4th of september 2019 with Mr Miles Berry at the london wellbeck hospital. i think he did an amazing job and can't recommend him enough for his work! i think the last pics i took of my chest were for tdov, and ill rb them after i post this for reference. i didnt have drains at any point of the surgery
for ppl with fibro, i was told that the pain after surgery either tends to trigger a flareup, or be really easily manageable, and it's hard to predict which it will be beforehand. its best to prepare for a flareup and be pleasently surprised if u dont get one. for me, i had a flareup that sucked but wasnt too bad as far as flareups go
you'll probably get given painkillers. take them regularly. it's easier to treat pain preemptively. if u don't get given them (no idea how it works outside of the uk) id say def get codine and paracetamol. u can't take ibuprofen for a while
i woke up from aneasthetic freezing cold + in a lot of pain. apparently most ppl dont need the full dose of morphine, but i did. after that it was a bit better. i was just So Goddamn Hungry literally it's all i was talking about
that night in hospital was probably one of the most uncomfortable in my life. you have to sleep sitting up for like blood reasons, so my back pain was quite bad bc of it. moving around a bit and adjusting pillows helped. if u have anything that normally helps ur back pain bring it with u to the hospital, & dont be afraid to ask the nurses for help with it (even if they can just adjust ur pillows for u). i couldnt rly sleep much but distraction helps. bring ur phone + headphones. i did a few ask memes when i couldnt sleep
the first week from surgery was rly tough, the first few days especially. this was bc i still had to sleep elevated for a few days and i couldnt get comfortable. i was too exhausted to do anything but couldn't sleep and it rly started to get me down. then i got some sleeping tablets (just nytol) and that helped so much. i literally cannot recommend it enough bc the not sleeping properly made everything hard (and like esp because with fibro the whole pain/fatigue/depression cycle is so real). once i started sleeping better recovery became a lot easier, and the tablets made the awkward sleeping positions more manageable. if i had to give only one bit of advice this would be it
on that note, ik everyone says this but do get a V pillow. it helps u adjust to sleeping on ur back and if u sleep on ur side normally it means u can like lean slightly sideways on it which makes it sm easier. also this isn't even top related but they make good back pillows when ur watching stuff in bed even now
get urself some video games (if ur into them) and easy entertainment shows lined up for when u wanna have them. recovering from major surgery makes ur fatigue even more pronounced so ur not going to be able to do all that much, but having light entertainment ready to go stops u getting as bored. its also a good excuse to finally play/watch the things you've been meaning to for a while
go outside when u can. if u have a garden just walk around it. it helps with a lot of stuff, and idk about u but i always forget how much it does. even just helping u sleep better if u get trapped in a fibro fatigued-but-can't-sleep cycle. and it goes so far helping u feel human in the first week
the first week is rly hard for a lot of ppl - its frustrating to have all that pain and exhaustion and not being able to wash or change the binder, and with the swelling and bandages under the binder it doesn't really feel like there's much change, which all sort of adds together. i keep going on about this week bc it helps to mentally prepare for it - there's no need to dread it, you just need to remind urself how worth it itll all be and that the rest of recovery is a lot better than the first part, and in time it won't have seemed that bad. big picture stuff
when u get the chest reveal, everything's better. i didnt stop smiling. and when u put the post op binder on afterwards, without all the bandaging, u like feel for the first time how much flatter u are??? and its amazing. even with the swelling. and then u get to shower and u feel human again and its great. (ik some ppl have their post ops/chest reveals much earlier than a week, but 5 days to a week is pretty standard in the uk. mine was 6 days i think)
more post op binder stuff: i got given 2. the first one i woke up in after the surgery and wasn't allowed to take off until my post op, and the second one i got given at my post op to change into after i showered. After that i alternated every few days. whatever u get given, if u get less than 2 i recommend getting another one so u can alternate them (if u want help sourcing them hmu. ive also still got mine i need to give away)
the post op binders were actually a lot easier to wear full time than normal binders. they were like more stretchy, and stretchy the full way round (bc they dont have the compression bit at the front). i used to sleep in my normal binder every time i slept with my ex, and that hurt like a motherfuck sometimes. the post op binder was much kinder to my ribs
i had to wear the post op binder full time, taking it off like once a day to shower n let my chest breathe (and massage my scars once i started that). some surgeons arent that strict abt wearing it that long, but it really helps swelling, & bc i didnt have drains it was rly important to stop fluid buildup. ik quite a few guys in my trans groups who stopped wearing their binder fairly early and then got quite a lot of swelling so i didn't want to risk it & i wore it for the full 6 weeks. at some point (icr when but maybe at 6 weeks? bc my post op was at 8 weeks bc he was on holiday) i didnt wear it during the day and only wore it at night
all in all the binder didnt bother me that much. it was more comfortable than my regular binders and i just kinda got on with it. it was annoying tho and i was glad when i could stop wearing it. for me the most annoying part was that it was a full length binder (i always wore half length before) and the riding up at the hips was rly irritating. i actually quite liked sleeping with it tho it was a pretty nice pressure stim ahah
some post op binders r more comfortable than others. if u have to buy ur own, i rly suggest going with a proper surgical one (they arent too hard to find second hand for free or cheap, again im happy to help here) bc they're kinder to chronic pain. i know that having a comfortable post op binder made it all a lot easier for me. there are also lots of alternatives w lots of price ranges tho, so that's not ur only option
ok i think thats everything right now! sorry its so long, but let me know if u have any questions!!
finally: before i got top ppl told me that its honestly life changing, and i didnt realise how true that would be. literally every single aspect of my life is at least partially better because of it, and most of them drastically so. I'm really excited for you to get that for yourself, and im wishing u all the best for it 💕
#and like i said ill post a more complete version at some point when i have time and my laptop#but dw that one ill be able to put under a cut#asks#long post#top surgery#fibromyalgia#is there a tag for chronically ill trans ppl?? i feel like there should be the venn diagram is pretty chunky#medical //#also its 2am as im writinf this lmao sorry if it doesnt make sense
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If A Moment Is All We Are (Ch.1)
This is the Dazai x OC/”reader” with bits of Kunikida x OC/”reader” fic I created.
I’m just gonna post the entire text of first chapter below the cut bc even tho it’s at zero hits, I still feel there’s people out there who might want to read it...
OC is based off “The Story of Your Life” by Ted Chiang, the basis for the movie “Arrival” w Amy Adams.
Shout-out to @discoten for Beta-ing this first part :)
*************************************************************************
Pale gold. Rose red. Dusky purple.
My eyes traveled from one brightly colored glass panel to the next, finally landing upon the deep azure blue of the Virgin Mary’s veil. I kept my eyes trained on her face, trying to stay focused on the massive stained-glass windows, the beautiful art shining all around me, anything to pretend I was at this gallery under different circumstances. Shafts of colored light as bright as shattered gemstones danced across the floor in the late afternoon sun, flitting over the black-clad bodies of the two men who lay prone nearby, their silent forms looking unnaturally still against the vibrant carpet.
I swallowed uneasily, a familiar sort of nausea creeping up from the pit of my stomach as I watched the dark pool of liquid around them grow wider and wider, the smell of iron heavy in the air...
Squeezing my eyes shut momentarily, I wrenched my attention away from them, trying to go back to staring at the windows but found myself looking once again into a pair of steel-gray eyes. There, at the entrance of the gallery, standing so still he may was well be a statue himself, was the young man who’d slain the two security guards lying on the floor nearby. With his pale face, stark-white cravat, and torn black overcoat, he reminded me of a vampire, or maybe even a god of death—his very image called to mind a painting of the Grim Reaper I’d passed on my way into this room. If only I had heeded the warning...
If I had, then maybe I wouldn’t be staring into a pair of piercing red eyes right now—the eyes of a shadowy monster attached to the back of this man’s cloak. As if sensing my thoughts, the demonic creature bared its dagger-like fangs and growled, its bloody, gaping maw stretching wide.
I kept my hands in the air. My cold, sweaty palms trembled on either side of my face as I returned my attention to the stained-glass windows around me. I’d had my hands in the air for so long that my arms were getting tired but I couldn’t drop them—I didn’t want to think about what would happen next if I did. Then the headlines tomorrow would read: “Attack at the South Pier Art Gallery. Three dead: two curators and one visitor.” In perhaps a day or two, they’d identify my corpse as “Kusunoki Kyou, aged twenty, a college drop-out and local shut-in.” They wouldn’t be able to get a hold of my parents; they were overseas and I hadn’t seen the rest of my family in so long, I wasn’t even sure if they were still in Chiba any more. Maybe the reporters would interview one or two of my former classmates... But would they even be able to find anybody who still wanted to talk about me after I shut myself away so abruptly?
“Hey, how have you been? Akutagawa-kun?” the man behind me called out brightly, the lilting tenor of his voice jarring, given our current situation.
I kind of figured he was crazy from the moment we met, but not this crazy.
What kind of man tries to play catch up with a friend (acquaintance? I honestly had no idea how they knew each other) while holding a gun to somebody’s head—my head? Even though I couldn’t turn around to see his face, I could picture his cheerful smile, the twinkle in his intelligent brown eyes, the layers of bandages wrapped around his neck. I could practically hear the gears in his head turning behind me as he watched Akutagawa and calculated his next move, the tone of his voice giving absolutely nothing away.
There was a tiny click—the sound of the safety being shut off—and I grimaced as I felt the metallic chill of the handgun’s muzzle pressing more firmly against the back of my head. Akutagawa immediately shot a dirty glance over my head at the person holding me hostage. He spat out a single name:
“Dazai-san.”
I went back to staring at the windows.
I really shouldn’t have left my apartment this morning.
***
Ramen.
Instant ramen was the reason I decided to venture out of my glorified broom closet for the first time in probably weeks. Had I known that the craving for convenience store food would lead to my being shot to death in six hours’ time, I would’ve ignored the growling of my stomach and taken my chances with starving at home instead.
Maybe.
I’d stayed up far too late the night before binge-watching the latest season of a new anime I’d picked up and my best guess for when I’d finally fallen asleep at my computer was probably around three in the morning. When I finally woke up (sometime around noon), I had Pocky crumbs in my hair, my pajamas were sticking unpleasantly to my skin and my stomach was grumbling from the lack of real food in who knows how long. Unfortunately, my pantry was empty, so I did what any normal person in my situation would do: put off going outside for another couple hours by picking another anime to watch. I only realized I really needed to get going when I finally reached into my giant bag of snacks and found it empty.
Dread building in the pit of my stomach at the mere thought of going outside, I threw off the pink bunny pajamas that I hadn’t changed out of in a while and tossed them on the growing pile of clothes on the floor. I hadn’t done the laundry in weeks and it was anyone’s guess which pile was “clean” and which was “dirty” (I’d lost track of which was which days ago). However, I didn’t have a real need to distinguish between the two until today... I stepped into the bathroom, walking right past the tiny cracked mirror above the sink without really looking into it and pulled the shower curtain closed. I knew what I would see: a greasy, dead-eyed otaku version of the creepy girl from The Ring, with long black hair and reddish-brown eyes, only instead of a haunted child, I’d see an adult who failed to get her life together after just two years of moving out of her relatives’ house.
Half an hour later, I’d dressed myself in an old pair of jeans and a large sweatshirt emblazoned with the logo of a magical girl anime and was desperately fishing around in my kitchen drawer for the thing I needed most: a pair of gloves. I hadn’t needed to go outside in so long that I’d forgotten to stock up on nitrile gloves and it was with an enormous amount of relief that I finally retrieved an old pair at the bottom of the drawer.
I was too tired and hungry to notice the small hole in one of the gloves when I pulled them on, nor did I notice when I put on my face mask and tied up my hair. Honestly, I was just lucky the torn one didn’t rip completely away from my hand when I was putting on my shoes but maybe it would’ve been better if it did. Maybe then I wouldn’t have ended up at the art gallery...
But I wasn’t thinking about my gloves when I prepared for my short trip; I was thinking about food. After all, it was supposed to be a quick trip, just a short walk through the hallway and down the street to the nearest convenience store, then back. It honestly might not have been so bad if everything that happened after hadn’t gone so horribly wrong.
The first thing that went wrong happened the moment I stepped out of the building. Blinded by the sudden appearance of sunlight, I smacked right into an old lady walking in front of my building and immediately fell on my butt.
“Oh my, Kyou-chan!”
I groaned as I slowly got back to my feet.
“Is that you, Kyou-chan? Nobody’s seen you in weeks; it’s been so quiet on your end of the floor that we thought maybe you moved out!”
“No, I’m still here, Yamazaki-san,” I replied, recognizing the woman’s face before her voice.
Mrs. Yamazaki lived on the same floor as me and was kind of a busybody, but a caring one. The evening I’d first moved into the building, she’d knocked on my door around dinner time and asked if I knew how to play Mah-Jong. One of her friends had canceled on their group last minute and they’d needed a fourth. I’d declined as politely as I could but was still somehow dragged out of my room by the boisterous old woman and forcibly socialized over a cup of hot genmai-cha. I’d meant to return the favor by dropping by with some kind of snack in hand but never got around to it.
I could feel the guilt curling in the pit of my stomach as I took in her tiny form, her smiling face but all I could do was smile weakly as she remarked on how malnourished I looked and how long my hair had grown since she’d last seen me. Then she spotted the tote bag in my hand.
“Kyou-chan! Are you going shopping?”
“Not really, just getting some ramen at the convenience store.”
Mrs. Yamazaki’s eyes widened.
“Is that all you’ve been eating these days?” she asked, sounding concerned.
“N-no. I’ve had...”
I thought back to my box of strawberry Pocky.
“...Other things.”
She frowned.
“That won’t do,” she declared.
Without waiting for me to respond, she grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the nearest crosswalk.
“Yamazaki-san!” I tried to wrench my arm out of her grip but she was surprisingly strong for her age. Or maybe—I cringed—maybe I’d just become extremely weak after months of being a shut-in and not getting any proper exercise. Drawing commissions hardly worked the arms.
“This isn’t the way to the convenience store! Yamazaki-san!!”
Before long, we were inside an actual grocery, Mrs. Yamazaki chatting away merrily as she pulled vegetables off the shelves and tucked them away into her own basket (I’d run into her just as she was about to go anyway). Occasionally, she’d grab something green and leafy and stick it into the basket she’d forced into my hands, and she kept doing it until she’d buried the thick layer of ramen and junk food that lay at the bottom of the bag. When she was satisfied with the composition of my groceries, she nodded approvingly and hurried me towards the cash registers.
“There now,” she laughed once we were outside and I was carrying a very heavy bag of things I hadn’t actually intended to buy. “That wasn’t so hard, was it?”
She stepped off the sidewalk and two things happened very quickly: one, a truck ran a red light, barreling towards her as she attempted to cross the street, and two, as I dropped my groceries and rushed forward to save her, my right glove caught on something sticking out of my bag and finally ripped.
“Yamazaki-san!”
I reached out—my fingers stretched towards her.
“Look out!!”
Several onlookers screamed as I seized Mrs. Yamazaki by the back of her jacket and yanked her back. We fell to the ground, crashing down onto the sidewalk just as the truck sped through the intersection, honking madly as it flew by. Somebody behind us was yelling for the cops, several people had taken out their cell phones and as one of the grocery store employees rushed over to help us up, I felt an odd stinging sensation in my right hand.
I looked down and saw that my right glove had been completely shredded. Though I still had coverage on most of my fingers, much of the pale blue nitrile was hanging off my right hand in thin, ragged tatters and there were several long scratches on the palm of my hand from where I’d scraped it against the sidewalk when I fell.
The store employee, a stout, middle-aged man with bulky arms, helped a very shaken Mrs. Yamazaki to her feet, and though I could feel her trembling as she clung to me, I tried to shift my posture as she leaned on me. I couldn’t let her touch any part of my bare hand.
“Are you alright, ma’am?” the man from the store asked.
“Y-yes, I’m fine,” Mrs. Yamazaki answered, her voice quavering as she looked up at the man and then at me.
Tears sprang to her eyes and before I could stop her, she got down on her knees and bowed deeply, touching her forehead to the ground in gratitude.
“Y-Yamazaki-san?”
“Thank you!” she whispered, her voice cracking. “You saved my life, Kyou-chan!”
“Yamazaki-san, please,” I dropped to my knees as well and tried to help her up. “You don’t need to do that. Please, get up.”
As the store employee and I raised Mrs. Yamazaki to her feet, she chuckled, her eyes wide with wonder as she looked at me.
“And to think, if I hadn’t met you on your way out this morning, I might be...”
She shook her head slowly and I exchanged a worried glance with the man who’d come to help.
“I don’t know where I would be if you weren’t here, Kyou-chan,” Mrs. Yamazaki breathed. “From the bottom of my heart, thank you.”
Though she seemed to be completely fine, with no broken bones or serious injuries, she continued to cling to me, and I felt her grip on my arm tighten as the employee informed her the police were on their way and we may want to stay to give a statement. Panic slowly rose in my chest as I felt my uncovered wrist coming out of my sleeve but as I carefully began to extricate myself from Mrs. Yamazaki’s grip, she suddenly turned to me and looked me up and down. She gasped.
“Oh, Kyou-chan!”
Her eyes had fallen upon my scratched palm.
“You’re bleeding!”
I yanked my hand away.
“I’m fine, ma’am.”
“Let me see it,” she demanded, grabbing my wrist. “I insist.”
As the store employee ran inside to get some band-aids, Mrs. Yamazaki gently picked up the edges of the ripped nitrile, pulling it away from my bloody, scratched-up palm, oblivious to my attempts to get away. As the glove gradually peeled away from my hand, I felt the warmth of her wrinkled skin brush against my fingers.
And then it happened.
The sound of canned laughter echoes throughout the room. Flickering green and white light casts odd shadows upon the walls. The cat-shaped clock above the television reads half past eleven in the middle of the night but there is another sound that is audible over the muffled noises from the TV. It beats in time with the clock and it sounds like something dripping, something liquid and warm.
Tick.
Tick.
T i ck.
The clock cat’s eyes shine with unnatural green light— light reflected from the television screen. They are blank , open, and staring, just like the eyes of the woman draped oddly over the side of the television set, her eyes wide with fear and shock.
Mrs. Yamazaki clutches at her chest. Blood dribbles thickly from between her fingers, her breath comes in wheezes and gurgled gasps as she slumps further and further down the side of her TV set. She leaves a bloody hand print on the side panel and falls to the ground.
Someone is laughing.
I am laughing.
The sound is deep, unfamiliar. There is a large, bloody kitchen knife held fast in my fingers, which are thick and hairy. I move my arm to check the wound Mrs. Yamazaki had inflicted on me and I see the vivid tattoo of a monstrous green snake, its fangs sinking deeply into a cracked human skull.
The television returns to its regularly scheduled programming. A time stamp appears in the upper right hand corner...
I came to, to the sound of somebody calling my name and immediately let out a sharp hiss of pain. While I was out, I had dropped to my knees, scuffing my jeans, and I could feel the thin skin over my kneecaps bruising horribly against the concrete sidewalk. Thankfully, that was all but my hands were shaking and I had a massive headache. Looking alarmed, Mrs. Yamazaki, not a single knife wound visible on her body, held my hand in both of hers with a troubled expression on her face. She had been the one calling me.
“Oh my goodness! Are you alright, Kyou-chan? You’re as white as a sheet.”
I immediately ripped my hand away and stuffed it into my pocket, just as the store employee returned with bandages. As he stuck out his hand to give me the bandages, I took a step back, shrinking away from the two of them.
“I’m fine.”
I stuffed my hand deeper into my pocket, ignoring the stickiness of the drying blood.
“Are you sure?” Mrs. Yamazaki asked, worry clouding her voice.
“I SAID I’M FINE!!”
That came out way louder than I’d meant it to. The people around me looked startled. I could hear the whispers. My Ability, “The Story of Your Life,” the curse of seeing visions of the future of those I touched, had manifested at the worst possible moment. I picked my bag off the sidewalk and ran.
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jjh - together
words: 2.1k
tags: fluff, slight!angst, domestic!au, dad!jaehyun
warning: a bit of sexual content? Not really tho bcs I’m weak
a/n: THIS IS LIKE THE LONGEST ONE I MADE THIS YEAR and I enjoyed writing this so much maybe because its dad!jaehyun uwu
Oh yeah, this is written based on miss Desirée’s blurb on @nctream (she is like the most amazing babe you should check her out and shower her with love and support she also loves meme isnt she’s just perfect uwuuuu)
“I’ll do the dishes. It’s your turn to put Her Majesty Princess Jung of the Southern Isles to bed.”
Jaehyun gave you his dimply smile as your daughter mimicked the same gesture. They got up from the dining seats as soon as you left to put on your apron and rubber gloves. Jaehyun collected their plates and put them in the sink. He wishpered I love you into your ear as he stroked your side before he left to carry the girl in a pair of banana pajama in his left arm and leaving the other free to hold a fluffy stuffed animal.
“I’m not a princess anymore, Mama. I’m an astronout!” Missy exclaimed, head rested on her father’s broad chest.
“What? I’m sure you were a princess this morning.” You turned around to them with your ‘shocked’ face. “Where is my princess now?”
“I want to find a moon bunny Papa told me!” You laughed and nodded, raising both your hands as a sign that you were defeated.
Jaehyun kissed the tip of her head, “Alright baby girl, time to sleep. Let’s give Mama some goodnight kisses.”
You held up your chin. They walked closer toward you and smooched your cheeks at the same time. “Nighties Mama.” She waved you her small hand as they strolled away to the staircase. “Good night, sweet pumpkin.”
You got back to your chores. Letting the tap water soaked the dishes before you brushed them one by one with a soaped sponge. Taking your time with the activity, you let your mind wandered around what had been going on so far today. You got up first in the morning, woke Jaehyun up and made him check on Missy in her room next to yours. They did joined you minutes after you were done making Jaehyun’s morning coffee and the three of you had breakfast; some toasted whole wheat breads, sunny side ups and baked beans. And of course you prepared lunch box for your little now-an-astronout princess. Then you did took a quick shower before you left the house for work.
It was routine you wouldn’t miss for the whole world.
On the other side, things at work were just demanding more and more of your attention. You worked for a renowned law firm as a senior lawyer. Your master degree indeed earned with real passion and talent. The job paid you real good money, but it also paid you cruel amount of pain in your head at times like this.
A fresh graduated intern who were chosen to assist you for the next quarter year decided to shoved half of your Attorney-Client Privilege papers you had been working on for couple weeks down the shredder. Not to mention how he messed up a joint representation meeting that afternoon. You knew you shouldn’t had blame him so much because he was an intern after all, and interns tend to make mistakes as they learn and grow from experience. But you couldn’t help comparing him to you; a perfectionist worker, barely made any mistake at work.
And to avoid all the problems happening at work, you decided to came home early (you knew it was rather cowardly, but better than to channel your anger there and cause a ruckus). So you chosed to relaxed a bit by cooking dinner, took a bubble bath with Missy (which you hadn’t done for a long while), and actually sent the nanny home early.
Jaehyun was surprised when he saw you were home before him. But it was only for a moment until you had your meals together with laughters shared throughout the good hour spent in the dining room.
Missy told you how she painted a really big frog for her art class at the pre-school, and how her friends envied her for having a cutely arranged lunch box. She told you about her trips to school with Jaehyun as he took her there every morning. And it made you feel guilty.
You knew it had been both you and Jaehyun’s desicion to take turn to do everything involving Missy. But lately you felt Jaehyun was the one to do it all. You thought you got so busy with works and it made you grew apart from your task as a mother.
There were nights when projects and works got the best of you, so you didn’t got to spend them with your little family at home. Yes you prepared breakfast for them, you guys had small talk in the morning before all of you off to your own activities, but at night when you were home you had your daughter already asleep in her room.
Jaehyun might spared you hours to talk through the night or for your marriage intimacy, wishpering to your skin that it was okay for him to wait for you. But some nights were just too tiring for both of you to do anything and just slept on your side of the bed. It might not be every single night you came home late, but the idea of your little one forgetting how you put her to bed or sing her lullaby or simply being with her broke you a little inside.
You knew Jaehyun could sense your worries, that was why he kept sending you a soothing gaze across the dining table previously.
Jaehyun was a good—no, good is an understatement. He was a perfect husband. Screw those who said no one is perfect, you had one as your partner for more than five years and you knew, you knew no other word than perfect could fairly described him. Before you met him, you thought no other guy could ever compete with your work ethic. You lived long enough in a belief that no man would want a workaholic woman as a lifetime partner. But then Jaehyun came along.
You met Jung Jaehyun at your last year of internship at some attorney corporation party, and he was still a doctor in the making at that time. Your senior at your law school introduced you to him, a future town’s best cardiothoracic surgeon.
Long short story, he made you fall in love with him. And so he did head over heels in love with you. He was, you could say, like no one else. He was able made you realized that there was nothing to compete about if you love each other. He changed your long-believed belief that a workaholic just need an understanding partner. Like he understood every situation you had, like he was always know when you didn’t feel best. There was no time when he wasn’t there for you when you needed him. He was the one who make your worst day worth living.
Oh, how you would never take him for granted.
And it bugged you a lot that you thought you were the one who couln’t keep up with him now. Did Jaehyun really deserve a wife like you?
A pair of arms slinked around your waist brought you back to reality, turned out you had already finished washing the dishes. Jaehyun kissed your nape softly as you giggled. “You surprised me, Jae.”
“You didn’t hear me coming around?” You hummed and shook your head as you took off the gloves and Jaehyun did you a favor by untying the apron’s string. “Thinking about something else?”
You didn’t answer, instead, you spinned around and latched your arms around Jaehyun’s neck. His brown eyes stared down at yours, equally warm. He brought his lips closer and halted when they hovered milimiters above your lips, smiling as he rubbeb the tip of his nose to yours.
“It was just stuff at the office, nothing big.” You gripped the end of his hair. “How was your day at the hospital?”
“There was a transferred patient from a neighbor hospital. He needed a transfussion they couldn’t provide so we took over,” Jaehyun blew you a sweet kiss. “Nothing major.”
“No big surgery you have to perform?”
“One on Tuesday, I’m gonna lead an aneurysm repair. Other than that one are just CABGs. I’ll supervise the residents,” You smiled to his neck, blowing hot breath as you kissed it slowly. “You wanna talk about it in the shower?”
“Mm-mm, I had a bath with our baby already.”
“Oh right,” Jaehyun let out a chuckle. “Missy did mentioned how you guys took bubble bath together today,” He kissed you gently, you smiled between the kiss. “None of my girls bother inviting me to a bubble bath party anymore.”
You broke away, a grin plastered on your face. “Sorry, I didn’t know I’d be home so early.” You dragged your fingers through his hairs, kissing him back in the same manner as before. You leaned back, resting your tailbone to the cold sink.
“Things happened at work?”
Jeahyun regretted asking you that question because a second later, you broke the kiss away. This time you even pulled your arms from his neck, fingers drew straight lines down his ocean wide shoulders. No words spoken between the two of you during that roughly fifteen seconds moment. Jaehyun watched you closely as you started to open your mouth to speak. “You can talk to me...”
You inhaled, “Do you think I’m a bad mother?”
“And how did you get that silly idea?” Jaehyun frowned. Although his words are lighter, his expression held a deep concern.
You groaned out of frustration, still in your husband’s embrace. “I know we’ve talked about this. And I know you would never not support me nor go against me upon my decision to work after having Missy.
“But I can’t help feeling like a bad mother. I worked my whole damn days instead of being in the middle of you guys.” You sobbed, Jaehyun drew soothing infinity circles on your back. “I know I still go to every parent-teacher conferences, I know I made her breakfast and lunch for her and you. But I don’t want to grow apart from our baby, from you. From our family.
“But things are just, I dont know Jaehyun, messy? I feel so bad for not being there for you when you got home from work most nights. For not being here when Miss got back from school.” You couldn’t stop the tears from streaming down your face, “That’s, that’s not what a good wife do. Even my Mom told me to just quit my job and raise Missy properly.”
“Hey, come here,” Jaehyun laid his palm flat on the back of your head and pulled you in. He hushed you down before he said, “You would never ever be a bad mother for Missy. And you would never ever be a bad wife for me, okay?” you silently cried yourself out on his chest, afraid of waking your little sleeping beauty upstairs. “Maybe you don’t do what most mothers or wifes do. But it doesn’t make you a bad one. Just because the society wants to make you feel bad, doesn’t mean you’re doing bad. And working harder doesn’t make you love us less, honey.
“You’re the best Missy and I could ever ask for in our entire life.”
You engulved Jaehyun in a tight hug, keeping him in your arms like it was your last. You sworn, God sent Jaehyun to completed you. To entangle you in his summer-like embrace everytime you felt the cold that is your problems almost killed you. To ensure you that everything’s going to be alright everytime the weight of the world is on your case.
“I know your parents and mine are sometimes being too intervening. But I know they meant well, darling.” Jaehyun kissed your temple. “But you are Missy’s mother and I’m her father. We’re the one to decide how to raise her properly. Together. And I know we’ve done a great job seeing how sweet and caring she has become.”
You pulled yourself away. You smiled at him, erasing the sticky stain your tears left on your cheeks with the back of your hand. Jaehyun cupped your face, his eyes scanning all of your features one after another longingly.
“You’re so beautiful, angel.”
You brought your lips to his, molding them in yours as your fingers busied themselves unbuttoning Jaehyun’s white shirt. You could feel his hand at the base of your hips, caressing them softly yet invitingly. You knew you’d have to wear that turtle neck sweater to work, but you didn’t care at all. All you wanted now was for Jaehyun to draw galaxy across your body you’d have to cover tomorrow. But tonight, tonight you wanted him.
“Jaehyun,” you wishpered and he murmured against the kiss, “I don’t think three baths a day would hurt anyone.”
You did ended up with three baths that day; one quick shower in the morning, one bubble bath with your astronout princess, also one long and hot shower with your husband. And as the night rolled itself into dawn with you beside Jaehyun, you knew you made your best desicion by saying yes to his proposal years ago. Because now you knew, if it weren’t him and you together, you could never make it.
#nct#nct imagines#nct scenarios#nct fluff#nct angst#nct u#nct u imagines#nct u scenarios#nct u fluff#nct u angst#nct 127#nct 127 imagines#nct 127 scenarios#nct 127 fluff#nct 127 angst#jung jaehyun#jaehyun#jung yoonoh#jaehyun imagines#jaehyun scenarios#jaehyun fluff#jaehyun angst#kpop#kpop scenarios#kpop imagines
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Watermelon - Roomate Mark Lee
this scenario is entirely based off of this gif not going to lie
Scenario: Mark Lee just really likes watermelon and also you
okay so you’ve been roommates with make lee since the beginning of sophomore year
you wanted to live off campus to save some money
and mark was sick of living with a swarm of guys who never seemed to do dishes
and hey less people less mess
also you’re pretty tidy yourself so it was extra good
anyway you guys had a few mutual friends and they ended setting you two up not actually but also kinda actaully lmao they ship it roommate wise
your both juniors now, it nearing the end of first semester so you guys have gotten pretty comfortable with each
like really comfortable you tell each other everything
everything excluding one maybe significant factor in your guys relationship...
and somewhere down the time line of living in such a small apartment together that factor became more and more signifigant
maybe it was from him constantly walking around the apartment with just a towel on after a shower or him not wearing a shirt during the early fall and late spring because your ac doesn’t work right
maybe it was the time he made you breakfast when you were sick in bed
and by made i mean he attempted to fry and egg and it didn’t work
so he put a bagel in the toaster bc even he cant mess that up he almost did though good thing you don’t mind extra crispy
maybe it was simply his smile or his sense of humor or his laugh
ah but no matter what or when it was
you had fallen for him. hard. and probably more quickly than you cared to admit
and hed done the same just neither of you were sure enough of each others feeling or confident enough to let the other know
but it doesn’t matter not that much any way
you were happy enough just spending lazy days in with him watching movies or just chatting sometimes when it was raining sometimes when it was perfectly sunny out
you were happy just having him drag you out of the apartment to go on adventures kayaking, squirrel chasing, trying out fencing club even if you both really suck
or sometimes he’d even bring his own adventures home like board games or a random diy project
never let him convince you to paint the ceiling again ever he looked hella cute with paint all over his face tho
or sometimes he would just bring home random things from the store?
like one day he brought home a watermelon and youre not really sure why bc its the middle of winter and watermelons aren’t in season?? he fckn love watermelon thats why look at his smile in the watermelon gif i wish i was a watermelon
“It was on sale y/n I had to get it. There were only 5 left. What if someone else bought all of them”
“Someone must really love watermelon to buy 5 at once, crazy man”
“…..”
“hey remember when you bought 7 and couldn’t figure out how to get them home because you rode your bike to the mart an-” and he deadass covered your mouth with his hand boi
“shhhhhh, we don’t need to talk abt that right now y/n just help me cut it up okay”
You guys, with a lot of difficulty and some very dull knives finally cut the watermelon into slices
hes a full slice kind of lad not a cube dude
if it was already pre-cubed like at a party though he would sill eat it
its watermelon
and then you would cut up the watermelon
and mark would be so !!! so excited
be really love watermelon
its just so sweet!! and watery!! and melony!!!!
and you and him would bite into it and...
ehhhhhh
and it would kinda be flavorless
like not sweet at all
“it’s not that bad, Mark.. okay? you did your best picking one out”
and Mark would do that thing
that sad Mark thing
the :c the sad pouty disappointed look
Nobody wants a sad :c mark
so you kinda run your fingers through his hair and push a few loose strands
Its starting to get long. You like it though. It gives you more of an excuse to run your fingers through it
You pulled him into a tight hug, one of those really really squeezing the air out of your lungs tight warm ones, one of those hugs that you could easily play off as friendly, silly even
But wow was your heart beating fast and your palms shaking
Mark would freeze at first out of surprise but the pout would go away!!
He would just be a bit caught off guard. That’s why he’d go a bit stiff initially. You weren’t really the type to hug him so out of the blue You were more of a cuddle when sleepy, or intoxicated, kind of human, a lot lett straight forward
He really liked it though really really
So much that he would relax and rest his hands on the small of your back rather than just stand there like a statue. Which is what he ‘claims’ he usually does when people hug him just like he ‘claims’ he doesn’t like skinship bloody liar
but the whole time his heart is going crazy and hes so concerned youre gonna notice but also he really likes hugging you
your skin feel cool and nice against him especially because he feels like hes on fire but
wow are you pretty and wow does he like you
but you don’t need to know that bc that would make living together awkward but it wouldnt be bc u like him too otherwise we wouldn’t be reading this now would we jc
And finally concerned mark would take over and he would suddenly pull away and ‘cough’
“??”
“Ahh I just remembered I have to finish that chem lab report is all”
“we finished that together a week ago Mark?”
“…i meant essay”
“but didn’t yo-”
but he would already be running away and locking himself in his room
well as best he could bc he still doesn’t have a door
he broke it off of its hinge they day you guys moved in mark you cute disaster
but you still try and not bother him if he goes in his room
privacy and such
and you’d be confused but also freaking out
oh my god what did you just do what if you pushed the bounds what if things are weird now what if mark doesnt talk to you anymore and stressssssssssss
A few minutes later you would hear his shower turn on
like this kid
i thought you said you had an essay lying hoe
anyways hed come out of the shower like 15 minutes later
hes not fast at showering bc boi needs time to shampoo after all those wackado hair syles he gotta keep from getting bald ya know
also he needs time to think bc wow do you make him crazy
and hed walk out into your little ‘living room’ and sits on the floor because you guys still havent gotten a couch even though its over a year since the two of you have lived together
and you finally threw away that makeshift cardboard furniture from removing in earlier this semester because mark didn’t just fall through them one he kEPT breaking and getting stuck in them
so to save the boy anymore embarrassment you threw them out together
anyway so he sat on the floor looking all cute mark like in typical mark attire
“hey y/n can you come here. I gotta talk to you for a sec”
but youre already talking??
but you wouldn’t question it
mark’s tone of voice was pretty serious tone to his voice which didn’t happen frequently
so you walked over by him and briefly sat on the floor before laying your head on his thigh
bc he in much more comfortable than the carpet and you werent really a criss cross apple sauce kind of gal at least not when mark was around bc as;doije;dfihw;erio
hed reach down and stoke your hair and close your eyes and hum slightly
“y/n” You’d hum again keeping your eyes closed and enjoying his close proximity
and youd kinda lay like that for a few minutes
and just as you were about to drift off to sleep he stopped playing with your hair
youre eyes open slowly, confused
and then Mark leaned down and before you could process what was happening he was kissing you
and you would have to fight to not break into a giant smile
because finally you were starting to think that maybe you were just a friend to him
but nope bc now ur making out lol not really tho its just a sweet kiss and not super long or agressive
he pulled away, scratching the back of his neck while give you that side smile of his almost sheepish one, but more flirty than sheepish
he kinda mumbled almost what sounded like an apology, but he really didn’t look that sorry and he certainly didn’t feel it i mean neither did you cute boy mark lee just kissed you
“you taste like watermelon” you roll your eyes
his smile spread into a full blown grin and his lil nose scrunched up. he kissed your nose.
he chuckled and semi-jokingly licked his lips “but tastier than the one we just had” You cupped his cheeks and pull his face towards yours.
!!!!!
#can you tell i love him???#love of my life#mark lee#mark#roommate!mark#nct#this actually took me a really long time to write#i had to keep stopping bc feels#s;djvwe;iofkj#mark friggn lee#nct dream#nct 127#nct u#nct 2018#imagine#fluff#scenario
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fallout oc questionnaire
in case anyone wanted a metric assload of info abt max
mostly doing this for my benefit
Which Fallout game are they from?
fallout 4
Which faction(s) did they join and which did they destroy? Why?
Max initially joins the brotherhood and becomes a dedicated railroad heavy post blind betrayal. He cant stomach the thought of destroying the brotherhood, bc of the squires on board and a fair amount of allies within their ranks. Instead he enlists the help of the minutemen to maintain peace btw the 3 factions, eventually the brotherhood leave as the minutemen grow stronger
What is their S.P.E.C.I.A.L.?
S: 4 P:5 C:8 I:10 A:7 L: 1
Give us a summary of their backstory.
a rowdy teenager always in trouble, comes from a large extended family, low-middle class, pulled into the high school-to-military pipe. Spent his military career just trying to survive, trained field medic. Eldest of 3 siblings, has one younger brother and sister.
What’s their full name and does it have a meaning? Do they have any nicknames and how did they get em?
Maxwell Ortiz, named after his grandfather who he was very close to. Called Vulture in high school for his looks and morbid sense of humor, earns “Mad Dog Max” in the military
What’s their sexual, romantic, and gender orientation? Do they feel comfortable telling other people?
Bisexual, Biromantic, Transgender male
He doesnt try to hide who he is, but he doesn’t volunteer the information either.
Do they have any mental illnesses? How do they cope?
Max has bipolar depression and PTSD pre-war, and it doesnt exaclty get better after he thaws out
Moslty he tries to keep busy. He deals w sensory overload by finding a small, quiet place to curl up and rest, favorite sensory stims for staying calm and focused are soft textures. he carries a small keychain stuffed animal he found in his pocket, and collects scraps of nice fabric and teddy bears. he’ll also run his hands thru his hair. he has an oral fixation and if he’s not occupied w a cigarrette he finds something to chew on, bites his nails, chews his fingers, picks at his skin too.
Do they have any medical conditions? Is medicine/ treatment available for them?
Max loathes doctors, his only regular visit is to refill testosterone.
How much do they care about their outer appearance? What’s their “beauty routine”? How often do they shower/ bathe?
Max neglects his appearance and hygiene and needs to be reminded to take care of himself. He loses weight and muscle mass quickly, noticing it can trigger dysphoria.
What do they fear the most?
He will tell you hes already lived through his worst fear, losing Maria and his entire family, but ultimately, he fears being alone and becoming a bad person.
Their biggest flaw? Do they recognize it as a flaw?
--ill get back to this one
What are they most insecure about?
relationships w other people. he feels like trouble follows him and hurts the people he cares about, like hes the source of their misery and he cant figure out why they let him stay.
What Wasteland threat do they fear the most? (ex. Deathclaws, super mutants, raiders)
Max fears nothing. Bring it on
What’s their zodiac sign or which one do you think they relate to the most? What are their placements (if you know them)? (ex. Aries sun, Taurus moon, Aquarius Venus)
Scorpio
What’s their Myers–Briggs Type? (ex. ENTP, ISFJ)
---ill get back to this one
What Harry Potter house would they be in? (ex. Gryffindor, Ravenclaw)
probably slytherin
Which Pokemon Go team would they choose? (ex. Instinct, Valor, Mystic)
instinct, he would love taking care of eggs and raising baby pokemon
Out of the nine forms of intelligence (rhythmic, spatial, linguistic, mathematical, kinesthetic, interpersonal, intrapersonal, naturalistic, and existential) which one(s) are they really good at and which one(s) is(are) their weakest?
best: rhythmic, spatial, naturalistic
worst: intrapersonal, linguistic
What natural alignment are they? (ex. Lawful Good, Chaotic Evil)
chaotic good
Do they have any hobbies? What are they?
Max likes to play music, he’s decent w quitar, keyboard, and drums
other than that he enjoys taking things apart and tinkering.
Do they have a favorite holiday? How do they celebrate it?
He used to be rather fond of Easter, for family traditions. Food, family, kids running around and playing.
What’s their favorite season?
Spring for sure, it brings relief from the worst of his depression
Do they have a temper or are they level headed?
Hairpin temper, ready to fight at any trespass
Do they express their emotions freely or hide their true feelings?
express freely but it takes him a while to figure out what they are.
Are they a leader or a follower?
He will say hes no leader but takes the role naturally when he has to work in a group.
How do they come off to others? What first impression do they usually make?
comes off as rather cold and aloof.
Do they prefer to travel alone or with company? Who have they traveled with if any? Current companion if any?
prefers company by alot. he’s usually w danse, the two are joined at the hip. he also enjoys being w deacon, preston, and maccready. he gets along well w piper and curie. i’m not sure if he’d ever find cait, but he’d fall ass over teakettle for her. i’m not sure if he’d ever travel w most of the other companions.
Would you describe them as selfless or selfish? Does it depend on the situation?
He’s pretty selfless, he cant stand suffering and will do his best to correct it. High empathy.
What do they find most attractive in others? Name at least one psychological and physical trait. (doesn’t have to be romantic attraction)
Kindness, honesty, and humor.
Physically, he has a weakness for full, round asses and nice thighs, hands that reveal secrets about their owners
Do they flirt often? How easily do they fall in love?
its rare for him to be comfortable enough to be flirty, but when he is he’s damn good at it. he does fall quickly but takes a long time to understand the feelings for what they are.
What’s their love life like? Are they interested in anyone or in a relationship?
Mostly monogamous relationship w Danse
Do they prefer to solve things diplomatically or using violence?
He gives diplomacy a chance, but he’s not good at it. breaking noses is easier.
What is their combat style? What range do they prefer? Do they sneak?
medium-close range, horrible at stealth. uses explosives and fire to confuse enemies and funnel them to his longer range combat partner, good at making a lane for snipers
What weapon(s) do they always carry with them?
laser rifle, small pistol and a sidearm, and several combat knives kept razor sharp
Their most prized possession?
a small collection of photos and holotapes codsworth preserved. he has a family photo of him, maria, his parents, and siblings w their children all together
the tapes are mixes of pre-war rock n roll made by maria.
Their thoughts on power armor?
ugh, if i really have to.
Favorite armor/ outfit?
light, armored jackets, t-shirt, and jeans
How’s their aim? Do their hands shake while pointing a gun?
he’s a pretty decent shot, but not spectacular. steady hands.
What are their thoughts on having to kill on a daily bases in order to survive? Does it take a toll on them? Or do they shake it off rather easily?
He becomes numb to it. it comes creeping up on him on Bad nights, and thats where the fear of becoming an evil person comes in.
Thoughts on death if any? (ex. Fear it, accept it)
“I am not allowed to die. I have people that need help.”
He is very tired, lots of thoughts wishing for death, to rest. Tries to survive, but. He doesn’t really want to.
Do they move around a lot or prefer to have a place to call home?
Both, eventually calls Railroad HQ and Diamond City home, but never stays in one place for long.
What’s their favorite location?
gonna be cheesy: in Danse’s arms
Their opinions on ghouls, feral and not feral?
Not feral: theyre just people. they didnt choose this. they’ve survived unknowable pain, and deserve respect and understanding.
feral: killing them is mercy. he feels that they must have suffered greatly in becoming feral, and their bodies are probably still incredibly painful to live in, resulting in their aggression.
Do they scavenge for their supplies or simply buy them?
both, also a big fan of trading.
“whos fuckin idea was it to use bottlecaps of all the goddam-”
Are they the type to get distracted and go off to an unknown nearby location or do they stay on track?
Stay on track, but very curious and enjoys exploring. will note locations to scavenge later if he cant get to them right away
How do they sleep? Are they picky about where and how or can they sleep basically anywhere?
Max likes a tight, secure place to sleep. he’s usually between and wall and danse. if he feels like he’s in a fairly safe location, getting to sleep is easy, tho he startles awake rather easily and has night terrors. if someone tries to wake him suddenly, like with a loud noise or grabbing and shaking him, they are very likely to get hurt.
What’s their favorite radio station and song? (post-apocalypse)
Atom bomb baby, uranium fever, and rocket 69
What’s their favorite post-apocalyptic food? Are they a picky eater? Do they know how to cook?
favorite: sweets, candy, and mutfruit
Not a picky eater, but he usually doesnt have much of an appetite either. He eats what hes given, usually without thinking about it or really tasting it
He has a fair amount of knowledge and skill in the kitchen, being always at his mothers’ heels in everything domestic. he loves his parents and was always eager to help.
What’s their favorite beverage? Do they drink alcohol?
he’s rather fond of quantum for the nastalgia and energy-drink buzz,
enjoys alcohol, likes beer, will drink whatever hes handed, if given a choice he likes whisky and nuka cola.
Do they have any tag skills?
--ill come back to this
Anything they like to collect? (ex. Unique weapons, Bobbleheads)
comic books, magazines, any printed media
toys and stuffed animals, fabric that feels nice.
Are they good at disarming traps or do they constantly miss them?
always walking into them. if he does notice one before hand he’s pretty bad at disarming them, he usually just tries to set them off from a safe distance.
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a really badly explained plot of Invasion AU below
Roswell, Vincent, Laionel, Nekro, Newt and Ryland are the main cast
there’s no Drew, Chester, Nestor, Kate and Liam
Kendrick and Nyssa appear at some point,
Vincents’ parents are dead and his brother Joel is missing,
well Laionels’ parents are obviously dead too
great
Gordon, Ramsay, Erwin and Chris appear
I still didn’t decide what about Mattie
basically there’s no Howard too, he doesn’t appear till the very end
Roswell is married to Ryland yaayy *but the media doesn’t know*
it takes place on Beta 5 (the canon main human cast home planet)
Beta 8 is the Greyhound home planet
!quick reminder! Barons full name is Timothy Roswell and his undercover name is Aaron Dantes
well the basic idea was that B8 invades B5 like in canon, but earlier
when Vincent was like 28 and Lai 6
but it starts just like canon - Ryland meets Tim that’s working on creating a breach between Beta8 and some other planet that ends up being Beta5, because their home-planet is being destroyed by meteor showers
(actually during this AU B8 gets completely destroyed by an asteroid after everyone moved to B5),
then Howard appears, he’s a lil shit as usually and would mess up with Roswells’ plans *bcs creating breaches in time an space IS ILLEGAL* so he kicks his ass and throws out of B8 plus creates a power-field around the planet that keeps the red shrimp away so he can work on his *not so* mischievous plans in peace,
there’s of course the civil war and the formation of the rebel groups against Baron
his *not so* evil plan was to make a deal with B5 humans to lend Greyhounds some of their land to move on to//and later on they could maybe build a city on the sea? like on a fake island or smth? idk// well they could live together - in return Greyhounds would give them their technology
what a damn utopia, he tried
at the other hand that deal was still kinda an ultimatum, Greyhounds had no choice, they needed to move on B5 even If humans liked it or not, because their planet was for sure going to get destroyed sooner or later,
so they invaded them. i guess. lol.
it’s earlier so the rebels forces weren't so well military equipped and just ready to stand against Baron, but still had spies among his forces, while he was trying to make this deal with B5 they started to encourage others to rebel *because it was taking a lot of time and humans are so fragile and it would be easier just to take the planet by force right duh*
in a result they actually /did that/
all Greyhounds are really short-tempered and impatient lol
well then there was no chance no finish the deal, it was cut off and humans basically run away? ? at one side that’s what you do when you get attacked and ur damn planet doesn’t even have an army, but at the other hand that was actually a really dumb decision made by humans?? bcs Baron was maybe not on their side, but also against rebels after all ?? ? heh
so his own forces go rogue and start mass murdering humans, stuff gets out of control for few days
sad
well until the ones in charge of the riots are taken down by what was left of Barons forces still at his side
still not everyone responsible for it dies and later on takes over the government to form the new Council, *do they ever learn?? no, they don’t*
so the riots stop *more or less*, before humanity is wiped out and they make an agreement - humans can live alongside them, can’t be enslaved, but basically have no other rights, and have to live in the specific parts of the town, mostly outskirts
and u know who came up with this agreement? It was Tim, but Greyhounds don’t talk about it, some still hate him for not letting them just kill everyone and be done :U
after that he was thrown out of his position of a leader and just came back to being a scientist
and that would be from Barons point of view
meanwhile back at the beginning Vincent was working as cop for mere 4 years when it all started
and as B5 didn’t have a proper army, police was the only institution that could stand against the Greyhounds *not for long tho* and was mostly in charge of the evacuations
well long story short he bumbs into that kid left alone on the street and adopts him. done. sdhfjkdshfjkhsdjk the city is burning!! gotta run away!!
and through the entire AU everyone keeps asking why the hell did he do that, that was so stupid, he just made a problem for himself wtf,
would u leave a kid in the burning city invaded by evil dog aliens?
no.
and they run away and just travel a lot, trying not to get killed, that keeps going for few years, until they meet and join Nekors group of rebels that’s trying to take down the government
good idea
that would be enough for the exposition pff
----- present time -----
which is like 8-9 years after the invasion
everything takes places in the newly built by Greyhounds Capitol City, that’s where Barons Lab Center is
and Nekor and the rest live on the outskirts
it's the human part of the outskirts, but poorer greyhounds live there too or just the one that aren’t so against humans
so like they have this sort of a bar, not everyone can get inside tho,
the bar is just in the front, its kinda like a basement ?? but not basement basement, they have gun storage in the basement, and in the back part of the building, they all actually live there or in the buildings around so no government spy gets inside lol idk, but it’s old, like made of bricks
im bad at describing stuff especially buildings
Nekors’ in charge alongside with Newt, Vincent sometimes gets to speak for himself as /a human/,
Laionel’s just sort of a there, they are keeping him as long as Vincent’s alive,,,
it took Baron some time to track down the rebels and they were the closest group so he just went to them
*imagine Baron thinking about how rebels dress to match with them dfhdksj*
he goes undercover *i just love this prompt fight me*
and it starts really cheesy with him saving the child from some Greyhounds on the street
later on Nekor n the rest take him hostage as a spy, but the child is like /ay he helped me/ so Vincent’s like/ ay wait let him speak/
he introduces himself as one of the Barons scientists that could provide them maps or other useful information
so the irony is that both Baron and Vincent have to work with those who started the war
tragic.
I mean it really is, Nekro, Newt, Hicks and the rest were rebels back on B8 so for quite a long time and it’s their fault too
Vincent doesn't know about it tho
Nekor as a long term rebel stil didn’t get over is hate towards Baron even tho he haven’t been important at all for a long time now and has no control, but Nekor is incredibly stupid in this AU and doesn’t recognize him
like everyone, but just, let’s say he should. at least a little bit.
they work together for over half a year (up to 8 months I don’t know)
during this time Roswell has to sneak out of his lab, sometimes few times a week
poor Ryland doesn’t know about anything and starts to worry quite fast when he starts to disappear for whole days :U
well until he finds out //that was like the first thing Ii posted with this au lol
it’s when rebels decide to ‘hey let’s just? attack Barons lab? I mean he’s not doin shit now, but he used to be a jerk right?’ good idea huh?’
but I have few other versions of how he could find out so that may change
*AUs for AUs for days*
same goes with how Nekor and the rest finds out
i just can’t decide which is canon in this au dksf
there’s at least 5 versions now
kill me
there’s also a part when the child gets taken into custody and Baron has to get him out of there. as himself. not undercover. that’s pretty ridiculous I gotta say
but what is this Barons long term undercover game even for
well there's another tower that emits a power-field that keeps Howard away from Beta5 too, so they have to destroy it/turn off, Baron can get inside because he projected and built it and does check ups once in a while, but can’t mess with it,
the council just waits for any mistakes he would do to shut down his lab or even get rid of him in any other way,
so he needs a backup like a group of rebels that would burst into the government building, make a mess, give Tim some time(lol) to turn it off, they would take the council hostage and wait for Howard to do his job.
easy.
well Tim should die in effect, because he kicked his ass in the first place so eh.
the only AU where Howard is actually NEEDED and WANTED what a plot twist
but how the hell can you fix a planet completely taken over by a race that can’t go back to their home planet *bcs it doesn’t exist*
isn’t that too much even for The Watchman
idk
no srsly i don’t know how to end it
???? ?
that’s it
i guess
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