#erileck

[ajokeformur-ray]

Joker and I have been married for five years and today brought home two children.

Cera (right) and Rex (left)

They were $10 each from Walmart in the Valentine's Day section. I love them SO much😍🥺

#erileck #self-shipping #i brought home jurassic park😂

[jslittlebirdie]

Hiii🥰🥰🥰🥰 how're you? I finally remembered to send you that hyper-specific Arthur ask😭💀 I swear, if my head wasn't already attached to my body, I'd lose it😂😂😂

Okay, so!

Most afternoons when I come home from work, I've got my bag and Arthur's hoodie still on (🥹😍🙏), my shoes are on, and I'm stood in the middle of my bedroom staring vacantly into space. I gotta take my shoes and coat off, I gotta make dinner and eat it and do the dishes, I gotta shower and take my hair down and brush it and rebraid it for bed, I gotta study and holy shit Erika there's too much to do and no time and I can't breathe and -

Just Arthur walking in and seeing me frozen in place but my mind is racing and I'm so stressed I don't know what to do? I need him so much but I feel like, with 9 weeks of uni work to do in a month, he'd be so disappointed and that fact breaks my heart every damn day. If I'm never enough for me then how can I ever be enough for him?💔

This turned venty and I apologise for that! I just thought some context would help with the question😭🫂🫂🫂💕💕💕

Hiiii Erika🥺🫂💜💜 I totally understand that and I'm sorry you're always this tired and exhausted. You don't deserve that. Please try to be as gentle with yourself as you can. I love you and I'm proud of you. And please know that you can always vent or talk to me about anything and everything. Asks or DMs. Long or short messages. I'm here for you as best as I can. Well, I'm still not sure if my answer is helpful or not, but I tried. Feel free to tell me if you want to have a better response💜

Yes, Arthur walking in and seeing you. His dark brows are furrowed with concern, but there's also a little smile on his lips when he notices you wearing his hoodie. He clears his throat to make his presence known and not startle you. He knows you, you're his fawn. His sweet thing. His love. You can feel his hands on your shoulders, squeezing them gently, and hear his soft voice. Arthur will tell you that it's okay, that you are not alone. He knows how exhausted you are and that your brain feels foggy. He understands. You both know that he's been there too, mentally and physically exhausted. So he will help you, slowly, your hand in his. One step at a time. If you want and need, Arthur will help you change clothes, something soft and comfy. And you can keep his hoodie, it makes his heart melt and beat faster to see you like this. You want to be together with him and have him close to you. Arthur will bring you some snacks, a cup of coffee and a glass of water. Yes, he will eat and drink and rest with you since you're just as worried about him as he is about you. And he will help you with your hair if you're too tired and frustrated to do it yourself. He doesn't want to see tears in those pretty eyes of yours. No scissors, only gentle touches and words of comfort. He knows how much your baby means to you. And as soon as all this is taken care of, you two can curl up together in bed, holding each other. You both need some rest. You need it.

Why would he be disappointed in you? Not when he sees you working so very hard, every single day. Not when he knows the reason for all your hard work. He is proud of you. So very proud. And Arthur wishes you wouldn't be so hard on yourself and that you could see yourself the way he sees you. You're doing your best. Even though there are moments when it feels like the whole world is weighing on you. And this is more than enough. It is okay to struggle, to feel feelings and to need help sometimes. It doesn't change anything about your worth. You are deserving of love, care and happiness. You are enough for yourself. You are enough for Arthur. You always are. No matter what. And he will tell you and show you and try to make you understand over and over again. He is by your side. On good days and bad. You both take care of yourself and keep each other safe. Because you love each other. You want Arthur for Arthur. And he wants Erika for Erika. You're always enough for him. Always and forever.

#I'm not sure if you like my silly writing or if it's helpful in any way #I'd be happy to write you something else #don't be shy to let me know #and I apologize for possible typos or grammar errors #my German brain is mushy pffft #erileck #self shipping #ajokeformur ray

[dumblefairy]

hi yes henlo i would like to sit on joker’s lap without asking first and wind my arms around his neck, fingers delving into vibrant green, and smother his face in so many kissies that he can only sit there lightly clasping my wrists and giggling, his nose wrinkled and the music of his joy filling my ears and soothing me from the inside out.im wamnt to give bb kissies and a love so intense he doesnt know what to do with himself or with me mwah mwah MWUAH

literally me opening my inbox and reading this rn:

also did someone say the words JOKER and LAP??? THOSE ARE THE TWO SUPERIOR THINGS and they hold so much power….

ngl i’m imagining you straddled across his lap whilst he looks like this bro byeeeee

oh man HE WOULD GIGGLE SO MUCH and when you smudge tf out of his makeup with kisses (getting it all over your own face MAY I ADD) he would grin so hard because you look so fucking cute at this point LETS BE REAL

dude you’re making him laugh so much the man is choking on his cigarette. you both look A MESS. he takes the day off because he wants to spend it giggling uncontrollably with his precious little fawn dhsjksjs like fr you both make each other SO HAPPY it’s honestly the cutest most pure thing and tbh i am crying

#ajokeformur-ray #asks #bro my heart is all fluttery now i feel so ALIVE #joker #arthur fleck #erileck

[jokerownsmysoul]

💌 Confession: Every time I see you on my dash or in my inbox my brain goes ✨✨✨✨✨ Flavia!!!!✨✨✨✨✨ and I get an excited rush and it means so much just to know that you're out there somewhere in the world, that you /exist/. You're such a beautiful and radiant soul and you're so perfect for Arthur and the love you share is so beautiful and ethereal. You're soulmates; meant for each other. I get protective of the love you both have; if anyone ever tried to get in its way I'd werewolf and go wild 💕

AND ANOTHER THING - Arthur and I both love you and we're so, so proud of you!!! Okay sdfghjk, I think I'm done gushing about you to you ksksks you're a creative inspiration for me omg ilysm 💖💖💖

Omggg this is one of the sweetest thing someone ever told to me 😭😭😭 omg I'm so softttt and it's funny because when I see you on my dash or my notifs I go !!!!!!!!!! Erika friend !!!!!!!!!! omggg, this is so incredibly cute and omg you get procetive of us? 🥺 This fills me with so much happiness and softness and rainbows omg thank you so much??? I'm so flattered omg thank you for seeing us that way 🥺💙😭💙

We’re really existing all over the world loving each other and loving Arthur. 😭💙 Among us we can see only a URL and a blog, yet Chuckletown and Arthur make us so connected with one another and we are so many cute souls scattered around the world, linked by an unknowable thread, like a boundary which makes us closer. And even though we can see only a blog and some photos of ourselves, we know that somewhere out there is living a kindred soul we can empathize with, and this distance can only make this bound only stronger. This is so adorable and I love it omg I'm so soft right now, thank you for this beautiful thought, it's the very definition of Chuckletown 🥺💚💙❤️

I get protective of Erileck just as much and you're so otherworldly together, you match so well omg you two were made to find each other and be together, holding hands while walking upon this earth together and I'm sure of it 💚💙❤️ we love you and we're proud of you just as much and Erileck must be cherished 🌈🌺💫if anything happens to Erileck I’ll go (ง •̀_•́)ง too sksk 💙🌺

#ajokeformur-ray #this is so cute omggg #ask tag #confession #ajokeformur ray

[ajokeformur-ray]

Every time I get on the bus I imagine Arthur sat beside me, his head on my shoulder or mine on his, his arm threaded through mine. His wrist bent awkwardly to hold the same hand of the arm he's holding. Whomever is resting their head on the others' shoulder is the recipient of crown kisses 🥹 this mental image for me is usually for the Arthur at the start of the film but sometimes it's Joker because he deserves love too😭😭😭

I wanna write about us so very badly, it's been so long I'm not sure I still remember how.

#arthur fleck #joker 2019 #self-shipping #erileck

[ajokeformur-ray]

Hanging on a thread so thin I've cried once already today and have held it back twice; I've only been on shift for about two and a half hours 😭

Joker needs to take me out... On a date or assassination, he can surprise me.

#erileck #self-shipping

[ajokeformur-ray]

I love Arthur Fleck so fucking much it actually hurts sometimes. Every time I think I can't love him any more than I already do, I somehow manage to surprise myself.

Maybe I'm overly emotional right now because I'm stressed to the point of having literally no appetite so I haven't eaten all day or because it's 9.54pm and I should be asleep already because I wanna be up at 3am so I can study before work, but I just... Cannot and will not stop thinking about Arthur.

How hard he tries to be good - going to therapy, keeping a journal, taking actual notes on what comedy seems to be based on what makes people laugh the hardest in Pogo's Club, taking his medications, holding down a job, working inhuman hours and then going home to be his mother's carer - and he's so exhausted, you can see it.

But he keeps going. He tries day after day after day, head bowed and an asymptomatic limp and feet dragging and shoulders slumped because he's suffering but he knows what he needs to do and he's doing it as best as he can.

He's not an inherently good person, from the moment the film begins we see that he's already started to descend and he's doomed by the narrative; it was always gonna end the way it does. But right up until absolutely everything is taken away from him, by his hand or not, he is trying. To be kind, to take his medications, to care for Penny, to do what's expected, to do what he thinks is right because he cares so much that it burns him. He cares so much that it factors into his downfall, he's tragic and doomed from the start but like so many of my beloveds, he went down fighting until he couldn't anymore so then he gave in and everything went to shit.

But he TRIED. Every day. Until that choice was taken from him.

There's so much quiet strength and bravery to Arthur and so much to him that he doesn't show to the world, either because he doesn't want to or he can't, but what we do see... I find so, so tragically beautiful.

Arthur is, in so many ways, the reason why I am who I am today. He's the reason I'm doing a bachelor's with honours psychology with counselling degree; he inspired me so much that I realised I want to help people like him and I've spent the last four years working towards my degree, I have two more years to go and then after that, there's gonna be post-graduate certifications and training and work experience to work on etc. but Arthur has always inspired me to keep going, to keep trying, just like he did.

Step step step step...

One day after another.

Arthur inspired me to be kinder, and if I can't manage that, then just be nice or even if that's too much, don't say anything at all, just smile and move on. He inspired me to keep going, to be gentler to myself, to write down my thoughts, to take time at the end of a day which has so much work that I'm swaying on my feet to brush my teeth because I'm so tired, to watch something I love because it'll give me something to look forward to at work or when I'm dragging myself through a 3am study session. My bed is my favourite hello and my hardest goodbye. Arthur keeps me warm inside, he keeps me going, he gives me a reason to smile every day, and I'm so grateful to this character for everything he's taught me.

How can I quit on everything I work so hard at, a thought I'm ashamed to admit I have every day, when someone like Arthur inspired me? If I quit, it'll be a waste of the four years I've spent so hard working for, but also it'll be a waste of the love I have for Arthur, because I pour so much of it into my degree. I can't help Arthur, but I can help people like him. I pour my love for him into my degree, and I try to honour the lessons he taught me with it, too. How can I quit my degree not only so close to the end, but also because to quit would be like giving up on Arthur? I may be exhausted to my bones, we all know it, but like hell would I ever give up on Arthur. And therefore, no giving up on my degree. I'll be grateful I kept going one day. (Right?🥺)

I love Arthur, so much, and I'll carry him with me for the rest of my life. He's always there for me at the end of the day, safe in my phone, and curling up in bed with him cures all ills. I'll never love anyone the way I love Arthur, not just because he changed my life and saved it on the same day (4th October 2019) in so many ways it'd take me another twenty minutes to list them, but also because Arthur Fleck is Arthur Fleck, and that's the biggest reason of all to love him.❤️

I wish I could tell him all of this. I truly do.

#erileck #self-shipping

[ajokeformur-ray]

My self-care app Finch is always coming for my throat 🥺🙏💖

#erileck #self-shipping

[ajokeformur-ray]

Once again begging for a heart to heart with Joker 🥺

He'd watch me fall apart and then put me back together with shaking hands and silent acceptance and understanding. He'd try to help me find practical solutions but all I'd ask for is a hug 🥺❤️

#erileck #self-shipping #really really not doing so good

[ajokeformur-ray]

with the sequel coming out, tell me again how you and arthur first fell in love! how did you meet! i wanna know your story!

I forgot the original story I had for us five years ago (I feel like it was that I saw Carnival dancing in the street, fell head over heels for this smiley clown, and approached him on a break to tell him I loved his dancing, but I could be wrong), so I have a new one which fits better the person I am now.🥺🙏 This is the SWEETEST ask and has me melting, I'm struggling so badly right now trying to balance everything going on and this ask is the perfect thing to give me five minutes to myself 🥺❤️❤️❤️❤️ I hope you enjoy the story!!

Arthur and I had a meet cute.

During the bus scene, we noticed that the lady never handed Arthur his card back even though she would have seen the text asking for the card to be returned (😡). So I can only assume she threw it on the floor or left it on the seat, I highly doubt she would have snatched the card and then taken it with her.

I was sat in the row directly behind Arthur so I saw and heard everything. His exchange with the child, the woman being rude (she was probably overworked, stressed and tired but there's no need to be rude to someone, especially if they've gone out of their way to try to cheer your baby up🥺), the sharp flick of laminated card as it hit the dirty bus floor.

I stared at that white card poking out from underneath her chair for the rest of the bus ride home, focusing on it to make sure I didn't forget to pick it up. I wanted to see what it said, and if it was indeed the man's in front of me then I'd return it to him.

(In real life I have run after people, total strangers, to give them back wallets, keys etc if they accidentally lose them on the bus, even if it isn't my stop; I can easily walk the rest of the way, that person needs their possession back way more.)

So when the bus stops and the man gets off, I remembered that Helm's Pharmacy carries my specific hair oil and I'm down to a third of a bottle so I need some more (my hair uses a lot of oil as it's a part of my daily routine and I will lose my shit if I don't have enough for the day's routine). I get up too, bending down to grab the small card on the way out.

It's nothing I haven't heard before as a psychology and counselling honours degree student, but the "please return this card" catches my attention and I'm so focused on reading the card that I almost walk right into Arthur's back as he stops to open the pharmacy door. I don't even remember getting off the bus; my body knows every part of my day because I live the same one over and over again without reprieve (but many complaints).

"Oh, shit! I'm so sorry, I was miles away." I am stammering, verbally tripping over myself as the man, his shoulders hunched up to his neck like he's expecting an attack, turns around. "I'm so sorry, really, it's just I realised you never got this card returned and I wanted to give it to you in case you need it, it looks well used and I'm so sorry I almost -"

My anxious rambling is cut off by a quiet high pitched giggle. Like recognises like as his ocean greens meet my hazel with green and gold flecks, and I fall instantly in love with the man whose name I don't know yet.

He waves a hand dismissively, and I hold his card out.

"Here, I'm so sorry again."

Arthur takes the card from me and stuffs into haphazardly into his pocket. I notice the colour of his jacket, his gorgeous eyes, those romantic dark curls, the nicotine stains on his fingers, the way he's wincing under the bright artificial lights of the pharmacy, and as I'm looking at Arthur, he's looking at me. I don't know what he's noticing about me, I've just finished work so I look an awful mess. Black bags under my eyes from weeks of sleep deprivation, messy hair falling out of its braid. A girl crumbling under the weight of the world and hoping she can keep it together long enough that no one will notice until she can get back to her bedroom and shatter. Only to pick herself up in the morning and do it all over again.

It's so similar to Arthur's mantra of step step step, but I don't know that, not yet.

"Th-thank you," Arthur stammers, sweeping a hand through his curls. I haven't realised we're both moving through the aisles to get what we need, and probably have been since I ran into him. I see my expensive hair oil and swipe two bottles, wincing at the price but willing to pay it for my favourite body part. I joke that it makes up for the rest of me... People always laugh but no one's realised yet that I'm being serious when I say it. In time, Arthur will, and he'll scold me for it. And I'll only smile, because he sees me and loves me all the same.

"You're welcome." I remember my manners and rush to introduce myself. "I'm sorry again to run into you, I'm Erika."

"Erika." Arthur repeats my name as he queues up for the prescription counter; I stand beside him. "My name's Arthur. Arthur Fleck."

And something inside me sighs in relief and whispers deep in the back of my mind, "oh, there you are."

#erileck #self-shipping #IM GONNA CRY OMGOMFOMGOMG HOLY SHIT ARTHURRRR🥺🥺🥺 #And yes im actually this anxious and twitchy irl and these are my thought processes #im a mess

[ajokeformur-ray]

I started growing out my hair the day I met Arthur (4 October 2019) and it's been trimmed three times since then but otherwise left to grow as it pleases. It was the same length as his when we met and now it's down touching my butt, so it's like my hair has grown alongside the love I have for Arthur and is "proof" of all five years I've spent loving him🥺🥺🥺🥺❤️

I literally and metaphorically take my love for him everywhere.

#self-shipping #erileck

[ajokeformur-ray]

Small ways I keep Arthur with me when I go to work;

Wear dark green silk scrunchies in my braid instead of my default and beloved black

Wear Arthur's hoodie

Get the bus even though walking is quicker and sit in the same seat he did (yes this implies I paused the bus scene and counted rows and whether he was left or right of the bus and yes this implies I still remember in 2024)

Listen to his music on the way to work instead of my own

I am scared and worried and stressed so I'm doing all of the above today; keeping Arthur close by makes me feel like I can handle it. Wearing his hoodie is the closest I'll ever get to being hugged by him🥺❤️

I may have to do ANOTHER late/all nighter tonight 💀 I wonder what Arthur would think of all of this.💔

#erileck #self-shipping

[ajokeformur-ray]

Sometimes when I feel especially fragile (as in, drop-a-teaspoon-and-cry-about-it fragile) I talk to myself the way I would talk to Arthur if he was in my shoes;

"Let's get you in the shower, my love, then I'll make you some dinner"

"I know, it was a hard day. We'll just take five minutes to drink coffee, honey, and then we'll work it out"

"Easy, it's okay, just breathe"

It helps. It really helps, even if it does feel a bit silly sometimes.🥺

#erileck #self-shipping #sometimes you just have to selftalk through it

[ajokeformur-ray]

I can say with complete certainty that I'll never ever love anyone the way I love Arthur Fleck. No matter where I am or what I'm doing or going through, I take him with me without even thinking about it; he's like a reflex. He's forever and I'll never love someone like this again. That makes me happy.🥺❤️

#erileck #self-shipping

[ajokeformur-ray]

If Joker walked in on me pacing the bathroom in tears because there's knots in my hair and that scares me because anxiety = knots = haircut, he'd take my comb away and give me a hug and crack a joke about murder to make me laugh and then he'd wipe my tears and do my entire hair routine for me perfectly because we've been together for years and he loves me hhhh 🥺🥺🥺🥺

#totally not writing this BC im doinf this rn #erileck #self-shipping

[ajokeformur-ray]

Waiting for FNAF rewatch. It's dark outside and there's no one here but me and the staff. It reminds me of the Joker era where I came here to watch it 4 times in six weeks, always at 5pm like I am now. Except now I'm older and wiser and better and kinder and wearing Arthur's jacket. I don't think he'd appreciate this film, but that's okay. I'd let him burrow his face in my neck🥺🥺🥺I'd protect him if I could.

#erileck #self-shipping