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beenbaanbuun · 1 month

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hi bunny! <33 i wanted to ask if you could do a little fic of how the ateez boys (specifically jjong) would be like during aftercare ❤️ after a rougher session— i’m in need of comforty cute stuff rn lmao 😭 no pressure ofc! luv u bun bun 🫶

aftercare w/ateez

hongjoong

i feel like hongjoong is very prepared for aftercare, especially if he knows in advance that it’s going to be a rougher session

like he already has a glass of water and a snack bar on the nightstand ready to go

coos and praises you as he breaks the bar into tiny pierces and slides them between your lips with his fingers

will absolutely force you to pee and shower once he thinks you’ve got your energy up enough to walk to the bathroom

stays with you the whole time you pee, and slides into the shower beside you to wash your hair

unlike some of the others i don’t believe that the shower will to anything else because hongjoong has a modicum of self control and can see you naked without going feral…

seonghwa

seonghwa’s first instinct is to go and grab a washcloth from the bathroom so he can wipe down the mess between your legs

of course, while he’s in the bathroom, he kills two birds with one stone and begins to draw a bath for you

wipes down your sticky skin with the warm cloth, all while whispering praises

‘i know you’re sensitive but you’re being such a good girl by letting me clean you! just a little more and it’ll be over, my darling.’

once you’re somewhat clean he guides you to the bathroom and helps you into the bath before going to chance the sheets

comes back the second they’re changed and in the washer so he can sit on the side of the tub and watch you with a pretty smile

yunho

cuddly boy!!

will literally just hold you to his chest and stroke his hand up and down your spine while the two of you return your breathing to normal

isn’t so fussy about the ‘clean’ aspect of it all, but will definitely make you go pee because we do not want any UTI’s in this house!

and once you’re finished peeing, he just ticks you back into his nice strong arms and lets you fall to sleep in his grasp

he trusts you enough to know that you’ll tell him if you need anything else; water, a snack, all that jazz

he also knows you enough to know that is so incredibly rare that you’ll want anything other than him and his warm cuddles

because let’s be real, lying on top of yunho with your head tucked into his neck and his long arms holding you in place is actually the best feeling in the world

yeosang

you know my thoughts on yeosang’s sex style so i also have to assume that he takes his job of aftercare very seriously

it’s half a guilt thing because baby boy went so hard that now he has to take care of you; he needs to know that you’re okay and he didn’t do too much

he starts by wiping you down and you’re guaranteed to be oversensitive, but he just shushes you and tells you how well you’re doing

ideally he’d like you to shower, but you’re too boneless right now and he doesn’t want to leave you for long enough to run a bath

and when he’s all done cleaning you up, he’ll hold a straw to your mouth, watching you as gulp down the water he brought you

i can see him needing his own validation as well so he asks you plenty of questions

did he go to far? did you like it when he did that one thing? were you having as much fun as he was? he really is desperate to know that you were having a good time

san

san is so fucking clingy that from the moment he goes soft, he will not let you out if his sight

he won’t send you to the bathroom yourself with promises of cuddles when you get back; why would he when he can follow you in there to hold your hand while you pee?

and while you’re in the shower you better let this man wash your hair, your body, your face, anything he can, unless you want him to pout

sits you on the toilet seat while he brushes your teeth; it’s cute but you can’t help but feel shy as he holds your jaw and looks down at you

and then when he’s sure you’re squeaky clean and happy, he bundles you up in his arms and drags you back to bed with him

from which there will be no escape, by the way; if you even dream about getting out of bed, san will be pouting and complaining

mingi

i like to think that he puts his mind, body and soul into sex, so he’s probably just as tired as you when it’s over

ideally, he’d just like to stay in bed with you, but he knows you have to replenish yourself, so he sets you little tasks

“can you go get a wash cloth from the bathroom so i can wipe you down?”, “go piss, girl. i’ll be right here waiting for you.”

and you best believe that after every single task you complete, he’s praising you like you’ve just cured world hunger or something

lips pressed against yours, letting you know just how good you are for him and how proud he is of you for doing what he asks

it’s safe to say youre leave your submissive headspace any time soon, not when mingi has you in his grasp, whispering sweet praises in your ear

wooyoung

wooyoung likes to do everything for you and if he even catches you lifting a finger he will become the most annoying person to ever walk this earth

like he’ll be getting you a glass of water and he’ll come back to the bedroom to see you with a tissue between your legs and all he can thing is how dare you?

literally storms over and takes it away from you before continuing the job himself, muttering under his breath as he cleans you up

“you weren’t so independent when you were begging for my dick, hm?” he scowls, “you need me to fuck you properly, so what makes you think you don’t need to help you with this too?”

like honestly, he’s kind of mean with it but with his gentle touch and the tiny kisses that he’s pressing to your thighs, you know he isn’t actually mad

just being his regular wooyoung-ish self…

jongho

oh you think he’s a teddy bear? wrong; during aftercare you’re his teddy bear and there’s nothing you can do about it!

because he’s way too strong for you to escape from the grasp he has on you, no matter how much wriggling you do

it’s fine though, because jongho always keeps. a bottle of water by his bed and a few snacks in his drawer and a pack of baby wipes too

you literally don’t even have to move from his arms for him to take care of you; everything you need is right there!

of course when you tell him you need to use the bathroom he’s pouting, but then you tell him he can come with you and he’s happy again

he doesn’t consider the fact that he can’t squeeze you to death when you’re actually on the loo, so when he realises that he’s pouting again

literally clings to you the moment you stand up, wasting no time in dragging you back to bed for more cuddles

#ateez x reader #ateez fanfic #ateez scenarios #ateez fluff #ateez fic #ateez headcanons #ateez blurbs

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the-acid-pear · 3 years

Text

I did my homework and i did my chores, time to tackle on the third book of this series, Son of Ogre

Chapter 1

Okay but the fuck is Baki planning to do if he stops fighting? That's literally all he has, he's not smart

WOOH THATS A BIT REALISTIC

PREHISTORIC ELEPHANT?!

King just went to have a snack. Also FUCK does that meat look tasty FUCKKK

This baby so cute 🥺

I'm so glad Yuji is doing stupid hilarious shit again it had been a while

Congrats on Baki for that mantis

Chapter 2

Who tf is this kid?

Poor kid lmao, i assume he will meet Baki

Look at my boyyy

HSTSRFAYDF DON'T CALL HIM A MANLET

Imagine Baki actually kills this kid HSJDYSSHCBT

Third comment with a ton of likes is "we do not condone child violence. We do, however, find it hilarious"

Chapter 3

AH SHUT UPPP KIDDO

But i like Baki memeing a round a lil

Chapter 4

🥺🥺 that's so sweet...

HELLOOOO STRYDUM MY GOD YOUR TITS GOT FATTER SIR 😳😳

Yujiro is such a fucking threat to society lmao

I love seeing Baki with his eyes open, he's looking more like his old self

Oh, shadow boxing incoming, alright

Chapter 5

Yuri? 🥺 /j

THE RETURN OF IRON MICHAEL?!

Chapter 6

I love how there's our silly little mains after every cover LUV em <33

Baki just dissociating his ass out and using it on his favor, the king

Why is Baki eating sour prunes aren't those meant to be sweet?

We all salivating

Chapter 7

Love to see there are even more swears there now

I can put my face next to my foot too tho

FAGDRJSEHARD YUJIRO CAN BEAT THE CANCER HOW ICONIC 😍

Also i would LOVE to see Yuji fight an Orca

WHAT?!

I love how everyone in the comments is calling out Rumina for not seeing issue going down to a dark hidden basement with a shirtless man older than him

Chapter 8

"piggy back me" USHSYFLFUDSY

This fight is going to be good

Chapter 9

Imagine Baki dies right here right know against an imaginary mantis lmao

Okay Baki getting damaged makes sense but the WALL?

Baki's dead (GOD IT HAS BEEN SO LONG SINCE I HAVE SAID THAT)

Ffs it's true Baki COULD create himself a stand 😰

Chapter 10

OH FUCK IT'S TRUE

Chapter 11

This fight is so boring i had to take a 6 hour break

Baki just can't win against nature eh

This reminds me of Garland pulling a suplex on that Anaconda

Chapter 12

I can't wait for the main cast to ACTUALLY appear, instead of just, you know, them in the covers

This fight is slow but cool but slow

To fight a mantis you must think like a mantis 😎

Though it's true in this manga you will most likely win if you steal your opponent techniques so

Chapter 13

I MISS IGARI FUCKKK

This is so dumb i luv it

That mantis be swearing lmao

Love it when Baki goes full Yujiro

Chapter 14

TOBA...

Holy fuck do mantis fly?

Secret Chapter?

Is this how Yujiro got born?

Idk girl i would have killed him if i was you

WHAT.

I KNOW THOSE FROGS THEY ARE FROM PUERTO RICO I THINK

I might just be sleepy but this is so confusing

AKSHSKGSKSGSJSG JUST KILL THE BABY IT AINT THAT HARD

Chapter 15

GAIA...

Why is he like this?

Is "he" with us right now?

...gotta admit that IS true...

I love Strydum sksgwhwg

Yujiro really went XD

I don't think my man Arun in the comments is aware how gay what he said is, though maybe I'm wrong

Chapter 16

GOD THESE FUCKING COVERS MAKING ME SO NOSTALGIC, LOOK AT SPEC!

ANIME KENNEDY?!

I can't believe Bush is dead

AN ASIAN BOY HAS JUST KIDNAPPED THE PRESIDENT...

8 of January? My god he's a Capricorn

I'm sorry, what?

LAHQIGWKQFWKSFWIWG 😭😭

I love Baki so much, THIS IS THE KID THAT I MISSED SO MUCH

This explains why Baki was in prison clothes in the anime teaser

Chapter 17

BIG NUMBER

That one mf like 😐

Glad Baki is 18 now at least 😌

Love to see Oliva back

Chapter 18

This page not even bothering to charge the pages anymore

I'm sure there were better ways to go to jail, well, actually, no, but still

Toba used to just chew that off

Baki did that mantis hit you in the head too hard?

I. I watched way too many prison movies and shows. I don't like seeing someone as young and pretty as Baki in such a place. I rlly don't.

Chapter 19

Yanagi baby i miss you...

IRON MICHAEL?!

Mfkhsjsys 😳🥴

Eh got my hopes too high

CHE BAKI PIBE... LA PUTA MADRE NI ACA ME ESCAPO DE MIS COMPATRIOTAS

I hope he swears too i want to see a boludo o pelotudo PLEASE

I mean para pelotudos lo veo a Yujiro todo el tiempo pero igual JSGWKEGWG me pone bien argento ver al Che carajo

Chapter 20

HE SAID BOLUDO SUAHWKWGAKSGSKSGSKGD

I can't take this omfg new fav I'm sorry Doppo but he just said boludo 😭

Pendejo is more used as pibe here but i will let it pass bc idk the lingo in Cuba and he spent some time there so

Why don't i speak like this too ffs? All i do is say eh and call it a day

He's cocky enough to call anybody any age pibe so I'll let that pass too

Por favor no lo hagas che sksgwj

Chapter 21

Che, pibe, it's a good day to die...

Chapter 22

GSHAGSTSG he should have said "no boludo"

I'm falling in love with this boludo myself

That's talented and brutal

OH RIGHT YOU LOSE YOUR BALANCE WHEN YOU DONT HAVE THAT

Chapter 23

Hm that's, cringe

YESSS HE SAID PELOTUDO

OAHWLGWKQFSKSGSJS SIII ROMPELO TODO CHE, ROMPELO TODO POR DECIRTE YANKEE KSGSSJGS

Honestly i too get pissed off when called American or European, though i won't throw shit to Baki, he's some random 18 yo japanese boy, no way he would recognize latinoamerican lingo lmao

King shit Baki boy

Chapter 24

Oh that's why he's called Jun Guevara, that's fair

I like how they are mixing a bit of truth and a bit of lie it's fun at least

Chapter 25

I like how they are drawing nipples now, occasionally

I can't wait for Viêt to complain about propaganda in the comments

OH SHIT

😳 :Y

He's sooo nice 😍

Chapter 26

Only three? You mean the third is... 👁️👁️

HAHA YEAH YUJI-CHAN <3

I can't believe he works for the USA I'm crying and shaking rn

What a progressive manga, the three strongest and most dangerous men and none of them are white 😍

GET HIS ASS BAKI

Chapter 27

Why is this guy sweating sm?

LDYDYSUGFUDT BAKI PLS

I like how the only time Baki was willing to kill a person was when he thought Sikorsky had hurt his girl

Chapter 28

I feel like Ian will die

Man i love how Baki is drawn in this book

Ffs i called it, i have watched way too many prison things to know how shit goes down

I have seen these three before in fanart but I'm curious to see what they can do

Chapter 29

Their faces remind me of Doyle

OH I CANT WAIT TO SEE EM IN THE ANIME

ASSHOLE DON'T CALL ME STUPID 😢💔

I'm gonna struggle to tell em apart but i think I'll manage

Okay I'm not the only one who thinks they look like Doyle, fair

Chapter 30

The mouth vs Yujiro when?

Someone mentioned the have the same vibe as the dudes that worked with Gaia and like 👁️👁️

Chapter 31

Lmao someone in the comments recommended the same thing

These three must be great at sex (sorry)

KSHALDHDKD NEW FAV COMMENT: "go to Japan and look for the word "defeat". That way you won't feel cocky anymore"

Chapter 32

Hehe hello Junnn~

KSHAKDHKWGS

La luna

Chapter 33

LOS TRES...

Okay that's funny, hocico instead of mouth (hocico is used for animal mouths)

I'm so glad i know Spanish

The two things that drive me insane and make me ramble are Doppo's beauty and this stupid argentinian

OSHSKWGSKSG

Chapter 34

Imagine he's doing that illusion thing Dorian did

With his own blood, that's so cool...

Hoho...!

I did that once when i had a terrible nose bleed, didn't go well

Chapter 35

This book is fucking boring NGL

"now that you got no more urine left in you"

AH.

GAHDYR LMAO

Chapter 36

HO THAT TITLE, PLEEEASE I NEED SOMETHING, ANYTHING, TO HAPPEN

HHH he kinda cute...

Oww :(

JDJSJFRGAJ

God piantao is an old word i had never heard it before

AND he took a piss.

LOCO NO SEAS HOMOFÓBICO NINGUNA MINA ACA ES MEJOR QUE ESTE PIBITO TE LO ASEGURO SKSGSKGSJAAGS

Se me cayó un ídolo y yo que le quería dar 😔

ÑSHWQLSGOSGDKW

Let's see if he lied to Baki about just liking eh /j

Chapter 37

I luv Oliva lol

AJSGSKSLAGHS BAKI SNAPPED

I too wonder where the fuck Kozue is

Chapter 38

LSHSLDGSLSGSIEG

He is jealous of what you two have, it's normal, el Che just rejected his love after all ;/

Oliva is a king

OH A HANKERCHIEF I THOUGHT THAT WAS UNDERWEAR SHSGS-

Oh shit Oliva is like 45?! He looked so young

Te fuiste a la mierda, Che, el chabón estaba siendo re bueno con vos

Baki is just dead

Chapter 39

I love how realistic Che's fear is, he's rather smart, though not this time

POOR GUY AJSGSWJW

I didn't realize Che said "what more, it may be a woman!" but to be fair they ARE in jail so

Chapter 40

I'm feeling kinda bad for him ngl

I feel happy for him tho 🥺

Bruh they added one page after the ending of some naked anime girl tf 😐

Chapter 41

These prisoners having fun is kinda sweet

YO INSANE

Bitches be complaining about Maria's looks are just jealous 🥰

Chapter 42

Damn she lorge

He loves fighting naked eh

Only valid person is the one saying Oliva deserves better treatment which tbh true

Chapter 43

Fun fact i wear my jacket like El Che too, unless it's too cold

El che with the hair lose is so cute bro,,,

Something something fingering joke

Sikorski could fold a coin too

I bet the bandana will break

Chapter 44

I would have just fallen on top of him, how is he gonna counter that, eh?

Oh that super fun to know!

Oh the good ol dirty technique, i have seen this one before!

Chapter 45

NOOO MARIA DON'T DO THIS TO HIM

This fight is super cool tho i love these two characters

Chapter 46

They just keep changing the rules i think Itagaki is just flexing at this point

LAAOSFKAGSKAGSKAF???

Baki wants his protagonism back

I'm getting pissed off they keep putting semi naked underaged girls at the end of every chapter 😐

Chapter 47

Bruh just realized, the mouth got so hyped as this new cool villain and they died in their first appearance 😭

His damn bandana...

#luly talks #i hit character limit already waaa :(#but I'm too into this to stop reading lol #btg #this saga is a bit boring but el che is funny :)#baki liveblog

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ladyofmaidensandwine · 3 years

Text

Just One Dance

Requested by @rileynicole1967

Request: “so maybe you could do a one shot for deanxreader based off the song “can I have this dance” from High School Musical. so basically dean doesn’t do the whole dancing thing and the reader finally gets him to dance with her and she helps him and it’s so fluffy”

Absolutely, luv! Side bar, I’ve never seen these movies, but I gave the song a listen. Hopefully this is just as fluffy as you were wanting!

Characters: Dean Winchester, Fem! Reader, Sam Winchester

Pairing: Dean x Fem! Reader

Warnings: Excessive fluff, implied smut without detail.

Wordcount: 2,852

There are some things a hunter doesn’t get, and a normal, carefree night on the town is one of them. At least, it usually is. This particular Saturday you have no monsters to kill, no wounds to mend, and no research demanding to be done, and you practically beg Sam and Dean to come with you to a local pub promising good music, food, and beer.

Maybe it’s slightly overdone, but you rarely have any occasion to dress so nicely, and as you look at your reflection, you have to smile. You admit to yourself you look beautiful, outfit the perfect color to compliment your complexion and your eyes, and comfortable so you have no qualms about dancing the night away, which you have every intention to do.

You open the door to your room in the bunker, right across from Dean’s, and hear a low whistle that causes your cheeks to heat slightly. “I feel underdressed, sweetheart. You look gorgeous.” Dean says with that easy, charming smile. The bastard has you positively whipped, and he doesn’t even know it. “Well, one of us has to look good.” You tease, brushing off the compliment in favour of poking fun at your best friend. He chuckles, rolling his eyes fondly. “Yeah, whatever. C’mon, let’s get Sammy’s ugly mug and hit the road before all the good parking is gone.” Dean beckons. The casual way he rests his hand on your back has your heart doing acrobatics, and you thank whatever God is listening for the years spent mastering your perfect poker face when you show no outward reaction.

You’re not a bird that hangs off the arm of the first handsome man she sees. In fact, you have a sense of pride in the way you don’t fall for charm or suave lines and you’ve never been the type to go for a one-night-stand just because someone buys you a drink and throws you a smirk. Dean Winchester is the only exception to your impervious shield- a simple smile from him has you feeling faint, and it’s not just his looks that have made you fall for him. Dean has been your friend and confidante. He knows things about you not another soul is privy to, and the same applies to you. He protects you, but doesn’t underestimate your skill and ability as a hunter. He’s your hero, and if you had a bit more gall, maybe you’d finally tell him that.

It’s a perfect night at the pub- not too crowded, but with enough background chatter to make an ambience like home. The first round is on you, as you’ve promised, and Dean watches you carefully as you head to the counter to order your drinks. Sam sits across from him, a smug and knowing smile on his face. “What?” Dean finally grumbles, raising a brow. Sam shrugs, but that grin only gets wider, Dean’s green eyes narrowing in annoyance. “It’s just funny,” Sam begins, fighting to maintain a nonchalant front while wanting to laugh at Dean, “you sitting here, watching her, Y/N standing there, looking back at you. Cute.” “Sam.” Dean says, tone sharp with a warning Sam promptly ignores. “Hey, if you have any plausible reasoning for me to believe you’re not smitten with her, now’s your chance to convince me.” Sam invites. Dean glowers at him from across the table, wishing you’d hurry up with those beers already, and Sam smirks, knowing he’s won. “That’s what I thought. Want my advice?” “Not really.” Dean mutters, rolling his eyes. God, where are you with the drinks, somebody save him. “Well, I’m gonna give it to you anyways. Stop being such a dumbass and go get your girl. At this point I won’t even complain if you snog her in front of me. Point is, Dean, you’ve got no rationale to not go after her.” Sam says pointedly. “I think you oughta just-”

“Hey, sorry I took so bloody long!” You call, hurrying over with four longnecks in your hands, and Dean shoots Sam a smirk. Perfect timing as usual, thank God. “S’alright. Didn’t miss much.” Dean shrugs, sliding over so you can sit next to him in the booth. “Oh, good. I put in some song requests- DJ says this place is great for dancing.” You inform, smiling brightly. Dean instantly shoots upright, cutting you a narrow-eyed look full of suspicion. “Dancing?” He repeats, already smelling a scheme as you give him an innocent smile. “Wouldn’t you know it, this pub happens to be known ‘round here for the music? Coincidence, of course.” You say slyly. Dean shakes his head, unable to maintain his glare so he hides the smile pulling at his lips by taking a swig of his cold beer. “Coincidence. Yeah, ok. Y/N, for someone who lies for a living, you’re pretty shit at it.” Dean smirks, and you laugh, knowing he’s teasing. “Alright, so maybe I had a slight ulterior motive when I said we should come here tonight, but I promise it’ll be fun!” You say pleadingly, turning to Sam for back up.

“Don’t look at me! You’re on your own.” Sam proclaims, holding up his hands in surrender as you huff. “Fine! But you’re both dancing with me. I’m not settling for a ‘no’.” You assert. Dean chuckles, giving you an amused smile. “You can think that if you want, sweetheart. I don’t dance.” He says firmly. “What do you mean? You dance with me to your bloody cassettes in the garage all the time!” You demand, raising your brows. Sam laughs, nearly snorting beer out of his nose, and Dean flushes up to his ears. “Dean dances with you?” “Sam!” Dean growls, thoroughly embarrassed. “Oh, come off it, it’s not a big deal, you baby.” You scowl playfully. “No, Y/N, Dean doesn’t dance, ever. Makes you awfully special, huh, Dean?” “Shut your mouth, Sam.” Dean snaps, glaring at his brother indignantly. You’re at a loss, looking between the two in confusion. “Look, Y/N, you’ll have to settle for the less good-looking Winchester tonight. I don’t dance, ‘specially not here.” Dean says with a shrug of his broad shoulders. You smile, a mischievous look in your eyes, and he knows you’re nowhere near dropping the subject.

Three beers later, you’re out on the dancefloor, laughing at Sam’s awkward moves. Dean’s smiling, eyes glued to you. It’s rare he see’s you this happy and carefree, and you look so beautiful in the low light of the bar. The power could go out and your smile would light up the whole place. He hates admitting it, but Sam makes a valid point. There’s nothing stopping Dean from telling you how he feels about you besides his own paranoia, and even that is n shaky grounds. He’s not entirely oblivious. Dean knows there’s some unspoken thing between the two of you, and knows you feel it, too. But letting it lie as is and pursuing something more are two totally opposing ideas, and he’s getting tired of his head and his heart pulling him in different directions over you.

You catch Dean’s eye, and leave Sam, grinning at Dean. “Come dance.” You say. He shakes his head, a small smile playing across his lips. “Told you, sweetheart. I don’t dance.” Dean claims, crossing his arms over his chest as he leans against the booth. He’s content where he is, just watching you, but you’re the most stubborn woman he’s ever met, and honestly, he should’ve known better because when do you ever take no for an answer? “Just one dance. Come on, even Sam is having fun.” You try to persuade him, Dean’s eyes flicking to his brother and back to you. “Y/N.” “Dean.” You mimic. You stare him down, eyes narrowed slightly. Dean almost laughs- he’s seen this face before, your shoulders back and spine tall. It’s the posture of a hunter, the determined face you make when you’re dealing with police giving you a hard time or a monster making threats. Now you’re using against your best friend to try and convince him to dance with you. “Please.” You pout, and he sighs. God, why are you so hard to say no to?

It’s a silly question because he knows exactly why you could ask for the moon wrapped in a bow and by God, he’d figure out how to give it to you because you have Dean Winchester completely at your mercy. “Dean, please, just one dance! That’s all I’m asking.” You practically beg, and he can feel himself breaking. “Sweetheart, I really don’t dance, not for anybody.” Dean tries. “Not even for me?” You ask him. Damn it. Damn you to hell, you’re good. That’s his weakness, you’re his weakness, and you’re using it to play him like a fiddle. Dean closes his eyes and his shoulders slump, and when he looks at you again, you’re beaming like you won the grand prize because you know you’ve got him. “One dance. Got it? Just one. And- and don’t expect no fancy shit, or nothin’.” He huffs, trying to maintain his grumpy facade. He doesn’t last a second because your mile-wide smile is even bigger as you take him by the hands and half-lead half-drag Dean onto the dancefloor.

Dean’s nervous as all-get-out. When was the last time he’s ever really danced, much less in front of people? “Just take my hand, Dean. C’mon, you killed three vampires just the other day and you’re telling me you’re nervous now?” You say, teasing him gently. “Yeah, well, vamps I can behead.” Dean mutters, earning a snort of laughter from you that makes his lips twitch up into a smile. “Just look at me, yeah? Just like in the garage.” You tell him. He nods, swallowing, and keeps his eyes locked on you, which really isn’t hard to do. Just as he eases into it, the faster-paced song transitions to a slow-dance, and he freezes, instantly panicking.

You squeeze Dean’s hand comfortingly. “Dean, we can sit down, I’m only kidding, I didn’t mean to make you so uncomfortable.” You explain with a guilty frown. Here you are, trying to get the boys to relax, and instead poor Dean is looking at you like someone told him his impala is being towed. Dean stops you, shaking his head. “No. No, just, uh, don’t laugh at me. I haven’t done this in... well, ever.” He says gruffly. You smile fondly. Your knight in shining plaid is nervous you’ll tease him for being a clumsy dancer. “Promise I won’t laugh. Well, maybe a little.” You say, and Dean shoots you a glare that vanishes when you give him a cheesy grin. “You’re a dork.” He smirks. “Takes one to know one, Winchester.” You wink.

“Dean, you’re stepping on me.” You tell him, biting your lip to stifle a laugh at the instant mortification on Dean’s face. “Shit, sorry!” “S’okay. You’re doing great. You are one in a million, Dean. Big, bad hunter, scared to dance with me.” You laugh softly. Dean huffs, and you smile. He’s slowly getting the hang of it, with your help, of course.

“Hey, what was Sam talking about earlier?” You ask. Dean falters, and you nearly trip, stumbling into his chest. You don’t know if you’re really standing still or if it only feels like time has halted, Dean’s green eyes staring into you.

His eyes drop to your lips. You’re not sure you’re breathing.

“Sam doesn’t know what he’s talking about.” Dean says after a long moment. His eyes dart away, and you frown slightly. “That’s not what I asked you.” “Y/N.” He says intently, hoping you’ll drop the subject, because the direction the conversation is going, Dean is going to be forced to make the decision he’s been putting off for so many years. “Dean.” You echo, just as firmly, not letting him escape your gaze. Dean steps back slightly, and you realize the song is over. You let go of Dean’s hands, disappointment and embarrassment washing over you. “Thanks for the dance.” You say, trying to hide your sadness.

You make it all of three steps before Dean reaches out for you. “Hey, Y/N, wait.” He says quickly, hand grabbing yours. “What?” “Can I have this dance?” “You don’t dance.” You say, confused. He looks at you for a long moment, a smile slowly forming on his face. “No,” Dean agrees, holding your gaze with his, “but you do. So?” “So what?” “So, can I have this dance?” Dean repeats. You nod, and he leads you back out. It’s another slow song, and Dean pulls you a little closer than before, staring at you intensely.

“What?” You ask, quirking a brow. “Can I ask you something?” “Ok?” You agree hesitantly. “Why do you always sit next to me in the booths?” Dean asks. You swear you can your heart plummet like a lead weight. “What?” “Yeah. How come you always share with me when we have to bunk up because there’s only two beds in motels? And how come you wanted to dance with me so bad?” He presses. “I- well, I-” You stammer, absolutely thrown for a loop, and he smiles briefly. “See, ‘cause, I’ve got this theory that the answer to that is sorta like the answer to the question you asked me earlier.” He continues, confusion and dread creeping up on you. “Dean, listen, we don’t have to talk about it-” “I think we do. I want to. Here’s the thing, Y/N. I don’t dance.” “Then why are you-?” You trail off. “Because you asked me to. And I can’t say no to you. What Sam said, earlier- you are.” He says, ducking his head. “I am what?” You frown. “Awfully special. To- to me.” Dean says quietly, blushing, and suddenly it makes sense. “Oh.” “Oh? That’s all you’re gonna say? I tell you I have feelings for you, and all I get is ‘oh’?” Dean asks, blinking in disbelief. He looks like he’s about to bolt, so you lean up and before he can make another smartass comment, you press your lips softly to his.

“Oh.” Dean breathes, staring at you. You smile, and he grins, and both of you laugh, not caring if anyone is looking. “Man, we’re a couple’a real idiots, huh?” Dean chuckles. “If I knew this is how it would end up, I would’ve asked you to dance with me a long time ago.” You tease, earning yourself another brief kiss. “I’ll dance with you all you want, sweetheart.” Dean says with a warmth in his eyes you’ve seen a thousand times before but never knew the reasoning for. You laugh as Dean twirls you, ducking under his arm with a bright smile he can’t help but return.

At some point you vaguely recall Dean promising to show you the rest of his dance moves in private, and you stealing the keys to Baby from his back pocket. You’re not sure how you managed to make it safely back to the bunker, and you definitely forgot to bring Sam, but you and Dean had spent years pining after one another and weren’t about to waste another night.

You smile, looking over your shoulder to find a familiar freckled and scruffy face pressed against your pillow. Dean’s still asleep, his arm a solid and warm weight over your bare waist, his chest firm against your back. His dark blond hair is a mess from you running your fingers through it, and you don’t want to know how your own hair looks, but you really don’t even care. You scramble for the sheets as the door knob turns. Sam gives you the biggest shit-eating grin you’ve ever seen, and the urge to fling a shoe at him is strong. “Y’know, when I told you to do something about your puppy love for Dean, I didn’t exactly mean ditch me at the pub to go sleep with him.” Sam says with a wiggle of his brows. Your face feels hot. “Sam.” You whisper warningly. “I told you he liked you.” Sam says. “Go. Away.” You whisper, glaring. Sam snickers. “You owe me, Y/N, we shook on it.” “As I recall, you said he wouldn’t dance with me, so you pay up, Sam.” You retort. Sam scoffs, and you glare even harder. “Sammy, shut up and leave us alone.” Dean’s sleepy voice grumbles, his eyes not even open as he blindly flips his brother off. Dean waits for the door to close and Sam’s footsteps to retreat down the hall before he finally looks at you.

“Jesus, thought he’d never leave.” Dean mutters. You grin, and Dean gives you a devious smirk, planting a kiss on your neck. “Dean!” You laugh. “Who says I was done with you? Sam can handle a few hours without us, and I’ve got you all to myself.” Dean says, and you don’t bother pretending to be mad when his lips meet yours, feeling him smile.

Who knew all it would take to finally get you and Dean together was one dance?

TAGS-

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@justagirlinafandomworld

Dean Babes-

@herstarburststories

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#dean winchester #dean winchester x reader #dean x reader #supernatural #supernatural x reader #x reader #fanfic #fanfiction #spnfanficpond #writer #request #one shot

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x-woozi · 4 years

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Sugar, Spice, and Everything.. else?

Part 25: waiting

Summary: After a very public embarrassing moment, y/n manages to make a few new friends. Though in trying to make those friends there is a bit of a complication in winning over the group.

A/n: Double posting because I just got promoted and am in a super great mood. Also this is basically the part 2 because I didn’t want to mess it up again but it’s not very long. Anyways the ending maybe coming soon... not really sure yet 😅

(I bolded and italicized her thoughts to read easier)

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I really hope he’s not going to do what I think, you thought before putting your phone back into your pocket. As you walk through the courtyard, there are a lot of lingering eyes and covered whispers.

‘Thats the girl that threw herself at Dino’

‘I heard she tried it with the whole dance team’

‘Well have you seen who she hangs out with?’

Nayeon quickly came into your line of sight and you could see her starting towards you. If it wasn’t for someone cutting off your path and walking past you, you would’ve ran straight to her to leave.

It was Changbin, and he did not look happy. His hands balled tightly, swinging at his sides as he got closer to a group of people. oh no. “Changbin” you called but he kept walking. “Changbin!” You rushed after him but it was too late.

As soon as he reached them he grabbed one of the guys by the shoulder, spinning him around. It was Dino. Without a single word, Changbin threw the first punch knocking him to the floor.

“What the hell is your problem?!” He yelled, picking himself up.

“Changbin stop it!” latching yourself to his arm in an attempt to pull him away.

“Ah, I see what this is,” DIno laughed. “The boyfriend, right?”

Tugging on his arm, “Let’s just go.” You could feel his muscles tighten, you could practically feel his anger.

“No, wait.” He paused pretending to think, “You’re just upset I got to her first, huh?”

Changbin ripped his arm from your grip and tackled him to the ground. Immediately everyone's phones were out and recording it.

“Bin, stop! Hes not worth it!” you tried reasoning, just as the two flipped. Changbin managed to get out from under him and to his feet.

“But you are.”

You were about to try to reach for him again but his comment threw you off and you froze. Just as you shook it off, you felt someone’s arms wrap around you. “Hey wait, let go of me!” Trying to wiggle free as they pulled you out of the crowd.

“Y/n, you're going to get hurt! Just calm down” you turned to see the face that match the familiar voice. “You don’t need to be here right now.”

“But someone has to stop them.” As if on cue the rest of the boys came running to the crowd.

Nayeon was suddenly at your side and wrapping her arm around your shoulders, “come on I think they’ve got it. Let’s just get you out of here before the rent-a-cops get here.”

You couldn’t help but to keep looking back. They boys struggled to squeeze through the crowd at first but now you couldn’t see them. All you could do was hope that they could separate the fight before either of them got too badly hurt.

You didn’t really care about Dino, but if he was really injured Changbin could get into a lot more trouble than he already would be.

Just as you and Nayeon reached the parking lot, 4 campus security guards ran past you. “Look they’re barely going to help,” Nayeon rolled her eyes as she got into her car. “I’m sure your friend is already out of there,” trying to make you feel a little better.

“Yeah maybe,” was all you said, but your mind on the other hand. Were they really able to get to him in time? Why did he have to go and do that, I told him no more fights. Now I have to worry about him! Ugh, I hope he’s okay…

“Don’t think about it anymore okay?” Nayeon said, pulling you from your train of thought. “It’s already done, let’s just get to your place and wait.”

“Oh how I love waiting…”

“Well sarcasm is a good sign” she laughed lightly.

“I’m fine. Well I was, sort of. But now I’m a little upset?” You said it like a question which only confused your friend.

“Upset like you’re sad? Or like you’re mad?”

Thinking for a second, not completely sure yourself, “both I guess? I mean the whole thing with the lies is kind of whatever I could’ve just ignored it.”

“But…” pushing for you to continue.

“I told him no more fights, and for all of them to leave this alone.” You turned a little in the passenger seat to face her as she drove, “I literally just told him the dude wasn’t worth it. And then hit him again!!”

“I think he just cares about you. I mean what if it was us and the rumors were about me?” She had a valid point.

You turned back to the front and crossed your arms, “that’s different.”

“Why because he likes you?”

“What? No. We’re friends, I’m just ‘one of the guys’. Where did that even come from?” Wait why do I sound so defensive?

“Right okay. I saw the way he looked at you the other day, he did not look at the ‘other guys’ like that,” she gave a quick questioning look before continuing. “Plus I heard him say you’re worth it” she teased.

You tried to think back to that day, not knowing what look she meant. There was nothing. I mean maybe he did look a little longer when i talked or laughed, but it wasn’t just that day. You thought about the night you went to have dinner at their house. It was the same then too. But the doesn’t mean anything, right? Her last comment had his words ringing in you mind bringing a little heat to your cheeks you hadn’t felt yet.

Nayeon cleared her throat loudly, “earth to y/n?”

“What?” You looked up to see you were home and she was already getting out of the car. “Oh my bad.”

“You’re looking a little flushed,” she teased as you walked up to the door. “You feeling okay?”

“Will you just get inside,” you pushed the door open and headed straight for the couch. “How long do you think it’ll be before they’ll tell me everything's okay?”

After grabbing a bag of chips Nayeon sat beside you, “I don’t know, have you checked your phone?”

You mentally smacked yourself in the forehead Duh, why didn’t I think of that? You pulled out your phone to see if any of them called or texted. “Nothing.” You let out a very long dramatic sigh.

“Dang, how long does it take to stop a fight and get out of there?”

“Oh man, what if they didn’t and now he’s in prison?!” You said before sending a quick text to the group chat hoping someone will respond eventually.

“Okay prison? that’s a little much. jail on the other hand? Maybe.” She said before shoving a few chips in her mouth, not helping at all.

“That’s not funny,” hitting her arm before taking the bag from her. “I’m being serious here.”

“It’ll be fine, I’m sure of it.” Her tone was much softer now, “just try not to think about it for now okay? Let’s just watch some tv”

You agreed, but you couldn’t just not think about it. You tried but still not hearing from any of them, hours later? It would be a lie to say it didn’t stress you out, but what more could you do besides wait..

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misterbitches · 3 years

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hi! this is long as shit i’m sorry. i hope it makes sense. i ahve adhd and like 5 million learning disorders so this is just word vomit cos there’s so many words in my brain. my b.

i’ve had such a tough day so thank you for replying and sharing! @yeedak

i was thinking about what i wrote and i meant to clarify that as well. some cases are fine for both parties and it’s not like you weren’t consenting and it seems like you were happy! same with my friend who was dating a 20 yr old. if they’re happy you know i’ll clown on ‘em but yea. so for anyone that sees these posts your relationship with your partner who is older or whatever. i’m some dumb girl on the internet okay. ill side eye older ppl tho

i think a lot of people feel the same way you do now (me included.) it feels really good at the time but alter we can see the dynamics playing out. i’m 29 now and i think aging is just such a huge process. it’s wild how you at 31 are a totally different person, right?

and the US racism is probably some of the worst ever in its iteration because of slavery which started from europe etc but USA is so fucking unique bc of columbus bringing slaves here and displacing indigenous peoples or hispanola and because america is so influential the way it views race, particularly with black people as objects, has so deeply permeated into the current historical psyche globally. it’s fascinating to track how necessary anti blackness is to the flourishing of america but also the world at this point. also want to point out how fuckign scary sinophobia is here especially for covid. one is a straight historical line (black ppl + the US) and the other had to be manufactured and to continue to exploit the non-white americans and keep antiblackness in tact.i could go on about this all day. the pain of this place is immense.yet as bad as it is here, this is still the only place i truly feel safe as a black person. because of the unique experience we have in america and through the diaspora especially because we are veyr much ocncentrated here. it would be nice to like move to norway and have some alleviation financially or get free healthcare it’s just not feasible if no one looks like me. it’s fucking tough.

i hope you don’t hate it here though and people treat you with respect. but as you know being a woman and jewish and an immigrant....shit is tough. the USA is a hellhole. :( america is so deeply tainted and desperately bad because it was founded on strife and blood and there’s no way to reverse that and what this country did in turn when it gained enough power and could capitalize off of the colonial forefathers. this is why we hsould all luv revolution!!!

HOWMEVERRRR

boy oh boy oh BOY OH BOYYYYYYYY. well wlecome to the world of BL lmao especially as an adult with some obviously deep perspective just given your background. it is a fucking mess and it’s a hard mess to like but it pulls you in. i approach it like i do with soap operas since these are essentially telenovelas, you know? just like the drama at a billion. but the tricky part of that is like....what parts of it do we understand for critiquing? because so many of the shows are so bad at being like good pieces of things to look at just production wise and story wise. but i feel like these shows ask us to take them seriously, so why shouldn’t we take the content seriously? and this is being primarily peddled to young girls.

i bring this up often but i read this thing about yaoi and the interest younger women/girls have in BL and its fascination with pederasty essentially. this component i think is key when we talk about who gets affected by these things the most. society in general is bad 4 girls bla bla we know lmao but in “more sexually conservative” societies it may be harder for these girls to feel safe even expressing normal emotions romantically and sexually and particularly with guys. some people hypothesized, and i think i agree with this hypothesis, that they can live through the casualness of BL. they don’t feel threatened because they can put themselves into the shoes of the other character. oftentimes, the more feminine or the younger. this was in conjunction with the age gap aspect (they say pederasty as well because there’s unethical age gaps that r gross and that is indeed what we would at least call a touch of sexual abuse if people dont feel like calling it an obsession with youth and power and uhhh young ppl and perhaps kids) where maybe girls could see themselves in these situations as the person being saved, loved, taken care of, and sadly also sexually active and penetrated.

i think that’s just one aspect of it but i do think there’s validity in who gravitates towards it. i cannot imagine seeing this stuff and not getting enough information as a young kid, i sure as fuck know i didn’t!, and seeing these things and you look at it with 0 critique because you’re young and you may have no interest in it or you simply cannot understand what is wrong. no one is teaching you these things and these shows confirm it. and it is wild how intrinsic patriarchy is to BL although in its existence it also can’t be in line with patriarchy given the nature of two [cis] men!

it begs the question about the replacement aspect. is it just so girls can put themselves in these characters shoes? if so then that means we believe that gender is so interchangeable within our relationships and interactions and that doesn’t seem right. there’s more to lgbtq+ than just existing; it’s finding ways to communicate, finding a family, safety, your people, being a free person. there’s a lot to gain and a lot a lot to lose. and a gay man is also not a woman because those are also two distinct experiences. especially in societies that have a more hidden aspect to sexuality (idk how to word this bc the BL industry would NEVER survive in america but in a way there’s a more “progressive” look at homosexuality but it’s still fucked up because we live in a Society, you know? at the same time look at what we are doing to trans kids. literally waging war so it’s bonkers how we all collectively have some real progress happening but at the same time not at all. the concept of ‘ladyboys’ and the frequency we see trans people in thai shows is wild and something that we absolutely do not see here in the US. still, none of these groups feel safe or are getting better material conditions in either place. we just show the ways we can try and tolerate oppression witout eliminating it imo)

to me it is clear: it’s money. which most things exist to make money so. but also who is the audience for these shows? and they have to market towards them. all that said all hope is not lost there are some decent shows. it’s just like regular media on TV though where it’s so fucking saturated as an industry that it’s literally sifting through garbage. and there are some days when you can handle the trash and others where it really fucking hurts to watch the violence, the rape, the manipulation, the violations, the stupid messaging. i have never seen more people trying to do mental gymnastics and seeing if things were “technically rape” than in teh BL fandom and that is so fucking sad.

i came into these shows at 28 with almost 0 clue of what as media BL was like esp as media that countries can use as soft power with the revenue. but i realize like...i’m 29 now and so many people don’t have a sizeable, though not huge, amount of life experience. and i wonder for people on the internet who are usually searching for something if they spend so much time on it like what a 15 year old girl thinks. what a 20 year old girl thinks.

it is incredibly problematic and so awful but there’s also some rewards. if you haven’t i would definitely watch i told sunsset about you which i don’t think i’m going to finish and i doubt i’ll watch the second installment (watch this be a lie) but when i say some fucking impeccable storytelling and art? phew. now that is a fucking piece of media that works. it takes from moonlight heavily and you can see like...the artistic dedication is there and the story makes its world and sets up its stakes extremely well.

i think because this is marketed towards much younger people too they know they dont have to try as hard. but they SHOULD because then you can have a fucking masterpiece like that. i think even this prolific gay thai filmmaker (who is like solidly against the government) who is so respected (and who i like a lot! if u wanna know i can tell u lmao but the films are very uhhhhhhhh “artsy”) would like i told sunset about you. i wish more people had budget like that and also just cared about the stories. it’s the fucking magic of art to figure out what you can do but there is very little incentive honestly. idk i am very pessimistic. there are days when it’s really a great pick me up and distraction but it is never a place i would love for to feel seen or heard but i’m more of the mind of i never trust the mainstream until they prove me wrong ;)

or i never trust the mainstream and i still buy into it anyway and then cry when i don’t like what i see adn i yell “BOO GET OFF THE STAGE!” when an old man won’t leave a teenager alone

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vexedtonightmares · 4 years

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Hi, rank the skam france characters for chaotic vibes and rank them for energy levels. 🤗

ahh sorry this took me so long to answer but i’ve finally done it (maybe)

just so this isn’t a novel’s length, i’m just gonna do the grew and lamifex

chaotic vibes

lucas lallemant- have u met him even one time. king of chaos and that’s on periodt luv.

basile savary- the gang are the most chaotic characters in skamfr and we love them for it. sometimes i forget how chaotic baz is because he’s such a sweetheart too, but then i rewatch s3 and i’m like ah, yes, the one who fell over in one of the first clips he was ever in.

arthur broussard- got hit by a car on friday and went to school on monday. if that doesn’t scream chaotic vibes idek what does.

yann cazas- i would prepare a powerpoint of every instagram photo yann has ever been a part of as evidence, but that would make this even longer, so you’ll have to take my word for it.

jo- we barely know her but i just f e e l those vibes from her. everything she’s done in every clip i’ve seen her in is just so chaotic in the best way possible.

alexia martineau- pink and blue hair screams chaos vibes i don’t make the rules!! also, remember when she said we should organize a hunger games for population control?

emma borges- re: my other vibe post, she talked to a horse to help her solve her life problems. godspeed my queen.

max- all of lamifex rules by chaos and i think that’s SO sexy of them. i do be thinking about the beginning of the vid jo made where max kept accidentally getting in the shot quite often.

sekou- vibe lord vibing and dancing with jo and max while lola and maya fall in love. the least chaotic of the jo/max/sekou trio, but chaotic enough. bless him.

daphne lecomte- we didn’t watch daphne go into full on chaos mode in season 1 and 2 over charles for her to end up at the bottom of the list.

eliott demaury- he’s more mysterious than chaotic, or maybe comes across as too cool to be chaotic. like, he has a secret street art persona known for getting to all these places other people can’t which, on the surface, is chaotic, but for some reason it doesn’t seem as chaotic because it’s him. idk i’m talking out of my ass at this point.

lola lecomte- she slapped a bitch to the upside down. case closed.

manon demissy- manon is the most feral of the nooras and u can quote me on that but otherwise she’s not as chaotic as most of the rest of our skamfr pals.

maya etienne- not much chaos, tbh, just a beautiful lovely flower who wants to save the whales and kiss pretty girls. valid, so valid. i’ll give her a lil chaos point for doing urbex tho.

imane bakhellal- none of the sanas are very chaotic, i mean, someone has to balance out the rest of the squad’s chaos, and imane comes in clutch for them.

energy levels

jo- she koala jumped on eliott the first time we met her. i cannot wait to see what other energetic fuckery she gets up to.

daphne lecomte- relating back to her levels of chaos, these two are intrinsically tied together, but her energy edges out the chaos. bubbly hyper energetic icon.

eliott demaury- sunshine baby who is physically incapable of not bouncing while he walks and smiles hard enough to create world peace.

alexia martineau- another ray of sunshine, plus, she dances and has a million hobbies which i’d say requires much energy.

basile savary- remember when they had to yell at him to quiet down when lucas introduced eliott as his boyfriend? yeah.

lucas lallemant- every party scene. he do be dancin. he’s just a bit more subdued than some others in everyday life, but he still got energy to spare.

sekou- smart ppl aren’t always the most energetic but u can tell he’s the kind of person who dives into one topic and can talk about it for days on end, and that’s a special type of energy that we love to see.

arthur broussard- u gotta have a lot of energy to bounce back out of bed after you’ve been hit by a car. (i’m sorry about all the car jokes, no i won’t stop)

manon demissy- manon leaning over to daphne on the bed in season one saying “i bet i can make you excited”. that’s all.

max- all of lamifex has an inherently strong energy level, but i think that jo takes up about 75% of it sekou has about 15% and max and maya have 10% and 5%, respectively.

maya etienne- enough energy to keep up with the rest of lamifex, but she’s definitely the most chill and serene of their crew. jo, max, and sekou are probably going off on the reg and maya’s there to bring them back down to earth.

yann cazas- least energetic of the gang but that’s just because his vibes are so strong on their own that he doesn’t need extra energy to back it up. live ur truth king.

emma borges- she has energy when the situation permits, but she’s mostly pretty chill. yes girl go girl give us nothing!

imane bakhellal- definitely not the most energetic but it works in her favor because it provides a nice balance within the girl squad. imane is on one end of the spectrum, daphne is on the other.

lola lecomte- i don’t think energetic is a word i’d use to describe lola, and i don’t think it needs to be. i just want her to be HAPPY goddamnit.

#skam france #asks #rochey1010 #pointless rankings

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ladyofmaidensandwinewrites · 3 years

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Just One Dance

Requested by @rileynicole1967

Absolutely, luv! Side bar, I’ve never seen these movies, but I gave the song a listen. Hopefully this is just as fluffy as you were wanting!

Characters: Dean Winchester, Fem! Reader, Sam Winchester

Pairing: Dean x Fem! Reader

Warnings: Excessive fluff, implied smut without detail.

Wordcount: 2,852

You squeeze Dean’s hand comfortingly. “Dean, we can sit down, I’m only kidding, I didn’t mean to make you so uncomfortable.” You explain with a guilty frown. Here you are, trying to get the boys to relax, and instead poor Dean is looking at you like someone told him his impala is being towed. Dean stops you, shaking his head. “No. No, just, uh, don’t laugh at me. I haven’t done this in… well, ever.” He says gruffly. You smile fondly. Your knight in shining plaid is nervous you’ll tease him for being a clumsy dancer. “Promise I won’t laugh. Well, maybe a little.” You say, and Dean shoots you a glare that vanishes when you give him a cheesy grin. “You’re a dork.” He smirks. “Takes one to know one, Winchester.” You wink.

His eyes drop to your lips. You’re not sure you’re breathing.

Who knew all it would take to finally get you and Dean together was one dance?

TAGS-

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@justagirlinafandomworld

Dean Babes-

@herstarburststories

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@spnfanficpond

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cromwellharvests-a · 4 years

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@cadcnce said: Well, if we're all piling on Bird I might as well join in. :V I followed because it was another character you've created, and you've proven time and time again that each muse is more than dear to your heart, and you let that love show in all your headcanons, interactions, and threads. I knew I was gonna have a good time. I stayed because- well, mostly for dirtsmoocher antics. ;^) I guess. ;^) Oh and you're my daughter.

bear you and i have known each other for going on.... what, three years now? four? and I hope you know that any and every time you send me something like this I still tear up a little bit like the infant that I am. one of the main reasons why i’m always drawn back to writing on here, on any of my blogs, even after long hiatuses and crazy happenings in my life is because of the irreplaceable bonds i’ve made in the course of my time trawling through tumblr’s many iterations— and even when we don’t ramble at each other as much as at our peaks, even if we’re quiet on the interaction front between our kids, you are always at the top of my mind when i think of why i’m most happy to have delved into tumblr rp in the first place.

you ARE my big wonderful papa bear, internet dad extraordinaire, and your constant interest in and support of my girls means the whole world to me. i respect the whole hell out of you, and i’m not only a better writer, but a better person for our friendship. each of my muses really IS dear to my heart, but i feel validated in the efforts i pour into them by your recognition and interest.

ragu and easy are so precious to me, and I love how their dynamic launched off from the get-go, filling a niche for Em that I still haven’t found the like of elsewhere. but i’m not in the least surprised that i was instantly wooed by one of your other kids, and was eager to carve out a spot for them to occupy together simply because i will ALWAYS love bouncing ideas back and forth off of you.

in sum: luv u dad thanks for bein’ here xoxo

#cadcnce #♥'( best for last? you know it )#♥'( that's my dad!! that's my dad! )

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behind-the-screen-of-bangtan · 5 years

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The colors in BTS’ works - a noob study

I tried to see if there was anything worth analyzing about the colors and here’s what I came up with. As the title implies, I have no knowledge in color theory nor any observation skill so take it with a grain of salt and don’t hesitate to correct me if you see something wrong^^

When I talk about the main color of a video, I don’t mean it’s the only color used, I just mean that it’s the color that appears the most. It’s obviously completely subjective. Same goes with the identification of the colors: whether it’s a greyish blue or a bluish grey is up to everyone. Again if you disagree, don’t hesitate to tell me!

I’ll mainly focus on the MVs Lumpens worked on since they did the majority of the videos, including the BU ones. GDW did almost all the other MVs, they are usually a bit darker and more action-focused, think “Dope,” “Not Today,” or “Mic Drop”.

I also won’t talk about the Japanese MVs but usually, they have the same color pattern as the Korean version.

There’ll be five parts:

The creation of the world

The red string of fate

The Butterfly dream

The temptation of the Green Fairy

Finding New Neverland, namely accepting the world

The creation of the world

If there’s one dominant color in 2 Cool 4 Skool, it’s black. Be it the boys’ outfits, the background or the lighting, everything is mainly black. And it’s the case in the MVs and the photo concept. They just wear some gold accessories.

In O!RUL8,2? it’s the white that dominates. Interestingly, the two comeback trailers announcing this album start with black as the main color but end with white, like to make the transition between the two albums.

We can consider the boys are associated with the black color (2 Cool 4 Skool and their black uniform in O!RUL8,2?) while the outside world is white. They rebel against this world in “N.O” and win.

However, against all odds, they don’t turn the world in black, they themselves turn in white but with hip-hop outfits and gold accessories, like a white version of their 2 Cool 4 Skool selves. Where the black uniform seems to represent the world trying to force its ideal on the boys, to mold them to its convenience, the white hip-hop outfit could be the boys accepting the outside world without losing their soul, the white cover them like a second skin without hurting their core, namely hip-hop.

Now that black and white are at peace, they can coexist in Skool Luv Affair and Dark & Wild. Other colors will also start appearing, but everything remains quite monochromatic. The only notable color is the light/greyish-yellow, coming mostly from the lighting. Skool Luv Affair also has hints of green in reference to the chalkboard.

While we’re here, doesn’t “Danger” feels like the night version of “Just One Day”? In both, the boy is asking for the girl’s company but one is all black and the other is all white.

In parallel to those albums, we got two concerts: The Red Bullet and BTS Begins. The VCRs follow the aesthetic of an almost monochromatic world with low luminosity and a lot of black. The only exception is the outside scenes in BTS Begins when they all go to school and that have slightly more vivid colors - possibly because it is the outside world that they haven’t explored yet (but they will during 화양연화).

The concept photos also follow this idea. First black, then white, then the two together, then colors. From 2 Cool 4 Skool to 화양연화 Pt.2 we have:

The world stopped being a blinding white for the boy in black who’s now standing in a yellow desert.

The red string of fate

There’s one color I haven’t mentioned until now but that still appeared in a significant way: red.

Since this part is a bit long, I’ll rather redirect you toward A study in red, an old post I rewrote for the occasion.

To make it short, the theme the boys question during an era (happiness, love temptation...) has often a red color.

The boys alone in the desert finds a red string. He starts to follow it, hoping it will lead him to the sea.

The butterfly dream

They finished school and are ready to discover the other colors existing in the world. This way Hwa Yang Yeon Hwa doesn’t have a dominant hue but rather a more or less bright color palette.

What retained my attention was the green and the blue.

Note that I’m probably influenced by the Peter Pan references making me associate green with Peter himself and Neverland and “Sea” where the lyrics explain that the boys are searching for a sea in the desert.

So let’s rather just say the boys explore the outside world and so there are many colors.

One exception to this explosion of colors is “Save Me” with its grey tone. However, in the Concept Book, there’s a note saying “Save Me 화양연화 Pt.0.” And indeed the videos before 화양연화 had also a grey tone so it would actually connect well.

As You Never Walk Alone is the events between 화양연화 and WINGS, I’ll put it here. We still have a palette of colors, maybe slightly paler.

But the MVs have a dominant tone this time: green for “Spring Day,” pink for “Not Today.” I won’t detail “Not Today,” but you can consider its color like the pink of AWAKE or the purple of “Boy Meets Evil”

Interestingly, this green color is associated with the motel Omelas. And I just said we had a green Neverland in 화양연화. We could thus consider that the Omelas the boys are about to leave is the Neverland from 화양연화, the paradise where they thought they could stay young forever.

Where it gets beautiful is that the scenes outside have two main colors, yellow and blue, which mixed make green and that can also be connected with the yellow of the desert and the blue of the sea.

As they have blue and yellow maybe they can try to mix them to find back the happiness from Omelas/Neverland? Sidenote: in the NOW 3 in Chicago Dreaming Days, there’s a part called New Neverland and shot in a park with lots of green and blue. It tends to validate the idea above.

The boy found a green oasis on his path, but it’s not the blue sea he’s searching for.

The temptation of the Green Fairy

So actually the outside world isn’t all that great. Black makes its comeback but it doesn’t represent the boys anymore, it could represent the hostile world, the bad sides of life.

The Short Films are a good example. Four are mainly black: BEGIN, STIGMA, FIRST LOVE, and REFLECTION. LIE and MAMA are white with a hint of blue (sidenote: J-Hope and Jimin are a 화양연화 pair). AWAKE is blue. If we consider each short film as a step in the Demian progression, we can find an explanation:

the four black ones (Suga, RM, V, Jungkook) are still wandering between youth and adulthood, lost

the blue one (Jin) has reached adulthood, namely the blue sea. Note that considering the light blue of the room and the possibility Jin is the bird from Demian, we could also see it as a blue sky, the one you fly through to reach Abraxas.

J-Hope has almost reached the AWAKE stage so he has a white background with a blue pajama. Jimin lies and pretends he’s also near the final stage when actually he’s not.

We have a possible epilogue to J-Hope’s progression in “Boy Meets Evil.”

“Boy Meets Evil” is neither red (temptation) nor blue (AWAKE stage), it’s purple, right between the two. In the same idea, the hallway Jin crosses in AWAKE is pale pink so it seems that before reaching the final stage, you have to go through this pink/purple/red path.

“Blood, Sweat & Tears” (and the concert trailer for The Wings Tour actually) seems to be the same thing, but for the remaining boys. The temptation appears in hues of red and purple. And we even have a blue room, like in AWAKE.

But now let’s talk about the elephant in the room.

There’s green in “Blood, Sweat & Tears”. Like a ton of green. So much green, Jungkook actually mentioned it in the Episode.

You may remember I named this part “The temptation of the Green Fairy”. Green Fairy is one of the names used to designate Absinthe, the green liquid RM drinks in the MV. Basically, it’s associated with decadence, death, and poets.

So it seems this time the green color isn’t related to Neverland/Omelas/Youth but to the theme of the album, namely temptation. But why the change then? Usually, they have the red color for the theme of the album.

It’s just my guess but since another theme of WINGS is the end of youth, it could be that the boys are too old for Neverland and so it becomes toxic for them: they have to let go of their childhood (and find the New Neverland/Blue Sea).

Red is the general idea of temptation - think about the red apple - while green would be the temptation to live in the past - funny for a time travel story, isn’t it?

The boy misses the green oasis, he wants to step back rather than searching for the sea.

Finding New Neverland, namely accepting the world

And finally, we reach Love Yourself era. While it’s pretty clear all the colors are brighter than in any other era, it’s hard to find dominant ones. Be it the Highlight Reels or Euphoria, we have a color palette like during HYYH, probably meaning the boys are exploring the outside world.

But it seems yellow and blue are slightly more present in the MVs for the main tracks. You can also think about the blue mold and the yellow blanket in “Serendipity”.

They accept to renounce to the green and to rather live in a world with yellow and blue, namely the desert and the sea. Like they accept to love themselves no matter how imperfect they are, they accept the world.

The last hints of green are in “Serendipity” and “Epiphany”. In the first one, it’s probably a remaining illusion. Tear proved Her is a lie:

the black “Singularity” invalidated the green “Serendipity”. They’re still trying to escape the world of temptations like in WINGS

“FAKE LOVE” going from the blue sea to the yellow desert invalidated the illusion from “DNA” where blue and yellow existed together

The green in “Epiphany” is most likely Jin's last attempt to change the past: the current time is grey, it turns green when Jin travels back in time and goes back to grey when he reaches the same future. I said it’s his last attempt because at the end when he goes out, the colors stay grey and it fits with the lyrics.

As this time they accepted their destiny, it seems the yellow and blue co-existing in “IDOL” is for real this time.

The boy found the blue sea. He doesn’t hate the yellow desert anymore. He has reached the New Neverland.

As a picture is worth a thousand words, I’ll use an ugly one for my conclusion:

Nota Bene: it’s interesting to consider those colors based on the Teageuk. The red is associated with the negative cosmic energies and the Earth: it’s the dystopian world from where the boys started. The blue is associated with positive energies and Heaven: it’s the ocean the boys dream to reach. Yellow represents humanity: the boys are in the desert and eventually they realize it’s from this desert that the ocean comes from. Combining the yellow humanity with the blue hope gives green, which represents youth in Bangtan’s works according to the WINGS Concept Book.

#BTS #Love Yourself #Wings #Hwa Yang Yeon Hwa #Dark & Wild #School Trilogy #Color study

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bangtanbombimagines · 7 years

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6+15 Jin fluff pleeease! Love your blog. Thanks in advance

Know It All, My Best Friend (Jin x Reader Fluff)

Prompt request: “I was stupid enough to fall for my best friend.” + “Is there a reason you’re crawling through my window?”

Summary: After learning that Jin will be moving away for university, you accidentally confess to your best friend! Mortified, you try to avoid him. Luckily for you, Jin doesn’t give up easily.

Word count: 1.4k words

You waved cheerily at your best friend, Jin, who was leaning casually against your locker. He smiled at you goofily, quickly righting himself so that you could retrieve your belongings.

“Hey, Jin,” you greeted, spinning the combination of your lock. It clicked open, and you hurried to grab your binders and textbooks.

“How were your classes today?” Jin asked conversationally, sounding more fatherly than was appropriate for the slight age difference between you two. It was only one year.

“Well, I skipped the morning,” you replied with a shrug. You shut your locker and pulled your backpack over your shoulder. “To the library?”

“Y/N, you can’t be skipping classes!” Jin scolded, smacking you lightly on the shoulder. “Your grades are important.”

“Whatever,” you scoffed. “Besides, don’t you skip just as often as I do?”

“I’ve got chronic senioritis,” Jin explained as if that were a valid excuse. “And what’s your reason? You’re not graduating yet.”

“Do I really need one?” you laughed, rolling your eyes. “Let’s just get out of here. Unlike you, I need to study.”

“Yeah, that’s true,” Jin replied with a cocky grin. “I did get all early acceptances.”

“Whatever, nerd,” you said.

You and Jin quickly made your way to the foyer of the school, exiting the building. Outside, it was growing cold. It was early December, but no snow had fallen yet.

Jin wasn’t the smartest student, but he was incredibly hardworking so his grades were among the highest. He had applied to all life science programs despite your attempts to get him to attend culinary school.

“Have you decided where you’re going to go yet?” you asked. Since Jin had been accepted to all the programs he had applied to, his choices weren’t limited.

“Yeah,” Jin replied, a little sheepishly. “I accepted my offer to K University. They offered me a great scholarship, too.”

“No way! Awesome!” you cheered, patting Jin’s arm. “Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”

“Well, I didn’t know how you’d react,” Jin explained, rubbing his neck awkwardly. “But I’m glad you’re happy. Thought you might be upset since K University is pretty much across the country.”

“Oh,” you replied quietly.

Jin turned to you, a gentle smile on his lips. “You forgot, didn’t you?” he laughed. He ruffled your hair. “Don’t worry, I’ll come and visit. There’s no need to be sad about that.”

“I guess,” you said, eyes downcast.

Of course you were going to be upset about your best friend moving away. But Jin was more than that–you had liked him since you met in middle school. Obviously, Jin had no idea, but he always treated you kindly, so you figured staying his friend would be fine.

But now that he was going to move away, you wondered if hiding your feelings was worth it in the first place. Now, it just hurt. Mortifyingly, your eyes began to water.

“Y/N, are you crying?” Jin asked suddenly, grabbing your cheeks in between his palms and forcibly lifting your head up.

“No,” you snivelled, tears running down your face. “Shut up!”

“So cute!” Jin squealed, pulling you into his arms in a tight embrace. Other students stared as they walked by, but Jin paid them no mind. “You’re so cute, Y/N!”

“Leave me alone!” you whined, your tears still refusing to stop. “I’m not crying!”

“I can hear you sniffling,” Jin laughed. Still, he stroked your hair soothingly. Jin continued in a more serious voice, “But seriously, Y/N, I promise I’ll come and visit. We can still talk every day.”

“It won’t be the same,” you mumbled. Eventually, you pulled yourself away from Jin’s arms, wiping away your tears with the back of your hand. “It’s my fault, I guess. I was stupid enough to fall for my best friend.”

Your heart stopped. Both you and Jin froze, your eyes meeting and widening. Jin was the first to regain his composure.

“Uh, what?” he asked eloquently.

“Ha ha, sike!” you exclaimed weakly. You shot finger guns at Jin, trying to ignore the fiery blush that was spreading across your cheeks. “Got you bad, ha ha!”

“Wait, Y/N,” Jin interrupted, annoyed. “Stop that.”

“Well I’m just going to go home now,” you continued awkwardly, already beginning to back away. “I’ll catch you later, crocodile.”

“It’s alligator,” Jin corrected. “But that’s besides the point! Y/N, we need to talk about this.”

“About what?” you asked. Then you spun on your heel and sprinted away. “Bye, Jin!”

You heard him calling after you, but you kept running. Your shame fuelled you, and once you got home, you felt like crying all over again. This time, no one was there to comfort you.

After sobbing into your pillow for around an hour, you sat up feeling calmer. Grabbing your phone, you turned on the screen to see dozens of missed calls and messages from Jin. You blushed again and quickly powered your phone off.

Deciding the best way to solve this problem was to pretend it never existed in the first place, you flopped onto your bed and let your eyes slip shut. Eventually, your mind cleared, and you were able to drift off into sleep.

After what only felt like a few minutes, you were woken by a banging sound. Shooting upright, you felt your heart pounding in your chest. The sun had already fallen, and your room was dim. The banging sound continued. Was someone trying to break in?

“Fuck!” someone swore from outside. You recognized the voice immediately–how could you not? Jin.

You deflated, sighing resignedly. There was no avoiding problems when it came to Jin. He never liked leaving conflict unsolved. You just hoped you would be able to salvage your pride–and your friendship–after this conversation.

Eventually, Jin’s body appeared through the window parallel to your bed. With shaky arms, he slid the window pane open and tumbled into your bedroom.

“Is there a reason you’re crawling through my window?” you asked, feigning innocence.

“What do you think?” Jin snapped, brushing dirt off of his clothes. He turned to you, his gaze narrowing. “You ran away from me, ignored my calls and my texts, and didn’t answer the door. What else could I do but climb through your window?”

“I don’t know, wait until I was ready to talk about it?” you replied, just as sharply.

“Why would I do that?” Jin asked. “You finally confessed to me.”

“I didn’t con–wait, what do you mean, finally?” you spluttered.

“It was obvious, Y/N. Of course I noticed, I’m not an idiot,” Jin replied, crossing his arms. You blushed and looked away, biting your lip. You weren’t ready for Jin to move away, and you certainly weren’t ready to for him to reject you. “The only idiot here is you. I can’t believe you couldn’t tell. Obviously, I like you too.”

“What?” you demanded, spinning to look at Jin. Unable to formulate any coherent sentences, you just spluttered at your best friend who was looking at you judgementally. “What!?”

“So dumb,” Jin sighed, shaking his head. “I’ve liked you for so many years. But I knew you weren’t ready to accept your own feelings, so I waited it out. Too bad it took you so damn long.”

“Rewind! Rewind!” you yelled. “You like me? You like me?“

“Yes, I like you!” Jin laughed, walking closer to you. He stopped once he was standing directly in front of you, forcing him to look up at him. “How could I not? You’re kind, pretty, funny, and honest–usually.”

“Seriously, you mean it?” you asked. “This isn’t some elaborate prank? A big ‘fuck you’ before you leave forever?”

“What? No,” Jin said, a little offended. “I really do like you, Y/N. I’m going to be moving away, but that won’t change my feelings for you. I’ve liked you for years, even during your emo phase.”

“Aw, don’t bring that up now,” you whined. You peered up at Jin, your gaze unwavering. “You’re really not just saying that because you feel bad for me?”

Jin rolled his eyes dramatically. Then, he leaned down and cupped your face, holding it in place. He closed the distance between the two of you, his lips brushing softly over yours.

“I’m not making anything up,” Jin whispered, his breath ghosting over your lips. “Do you believe me now?”

“Fine,” you replied breathlessly. “But no take backs!”

You flung your arms around Jin’s neck, smashing your mouths together. Jin laughed agains your lips before returning the kiss wholeheartedly. You seriously regretted not confessing your feelings earlier.

But better late than never, you guessed.

- Girl in Luv

BBMAs guys!!! BTS is out there making history. I’m so proud!!! Also…they slayed! They all looked so good. The foreheads were showing! Everything was great! Wish they performed, but it was nice to see them at the show. I wonder if they’re turning up now ;) Thanks for reading guys, hope you enjoyed!!! 💛

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kendrasyrdal · 7 years

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5 Things. (3. 24. 17.)

1. I’m trying to get to the bottom about why I have a tendency to fall in love with people or just be wildly fascinated by people who I know don’t think of me hardly at all. Something about ambivalence is so attractive to me. Maybe because it seems like a challenge and I’m competitive so I want to prove I can make them give a shit. I don’t know if has something to do with my MBTI or my zodiac sign or some sort of otherwise undiagnosed part of my genetic makeup but I’m constantly clawing at people who don’t seem to care about me one way or the other. It’s more than slightly self-destructive and almost always ends in disappointment (for me). But I can’t seem to stop. I remember someone telling me a ~long time ago~ that I would grow out of this. That it was just a faze. But here I am, past the expiration date of when being self-destructive and was cute and adorkable and quirky...and I’m still that girl desperately trying to get her bartender crush to notice her.

2. I remember I used to make fun of some of my friends for having what I deemed, “ridiculous” standards. Usually these pertained to someone’s physical appearance, but other times I just thought they were being shallow for writing someone off as unintelligent just because he happened to love tank tops. But more and more, I feel my own quote unquote “standards” creeping upwards. I don’t like people who don’t ask questions that have definite answers. (How are you? For example. Terrible question!) I don’t like people who press about my job. I don’t like people who don’t read. I don’t like people who “aren’t really into politics.” So these things that use to not matter to me, all of a sudden matter. And while maybe some would look at that and say it’s a good thing, I’m kind of worried it’s yet another nail in the coffin that says I’m undatable. I want to be easy going, I want to be laid back, I want to be chill. But as I get older...maybe I’m not. Idk I guess time will tell.

3. It may come as a surprise to some people but my “receiving” love language (what I need/want from people) is words of affirmation. Jokingly I refer to this as, “I just want to know I’m doing a good job.” But more seriously hearing that people like what I’m doing or appreciate me is HUGE for me. It means I’m on the right path. Maybe it goes back to getting standing ovations from my theatre days, I don’t know. But what’s tricky about the industry I’m now in is there’s not a lot of gold stars. You’re kind of just expected to do your work. Head down, eyes focused, clear vision, no spook. So rarely do I hear from people that they like what I’m doing. Sure I get the random “OMG I LUV U” on Twitter, but honestly I’m not the type of writer that gets that very often. So I’m having to figure out how to navigate a world where my affirmation and validation comes from somewhere else. And ngl, it can be really tiring and frustrating some days. But, I’m an adult. So there’s also the balance of not expecting what someone isn’t going to give you. It’s weird! It was a weird week!

4. My best friend is moving out to the suburbs this weekend and I have a lot of feelings about it. I’m on one hand, so happy for him and proud of him and all of that. And on the other, I’m really sad. Our ‘Friends’ living situation (he’s been living 5 floors below me for almost two years) is coming to an end. It’s weird to feel like things are over. Like I KNOW I couldn’t get rid of him if I tried and we’re in it to win it and all that. But it’s definitely the closing of a chapter. And that means I have to figure out what living in the city without him is going to mean for me. Which is intimidating and scary and even though I’m 27 feels overwhelming.

5. I’ve picked up a really hilarious(ly irresponsible) habit of drunk shopping on Amazon late at night. It has resulted in some recent surprises that are pretty funny. I might have to turn it into a series on Thought Catalog because this month alone I bought records, bikinis, a face mask, lipstick, and a bunch of chokers. Drunk me really does have zero point zero self-control.

#five things #5 things #personal

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chae-peachwon · 4 years

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So I’ve been wanting to do this for awhile and I wanted to wait until I got home so I could be in the comfort of my house. But basically on Friday I had a “mental breakdown” about Namjoon and BTS as a whole and how much they have changed my life. I think this is gonna be pretty lengthy so I’m putting a read more

So this past Friday my friend and I were making a drive to our friends for our yearly Christmas party, which was about 4-5 hours (in reality it should’ve been about 2 1/2 but traffic was ass so). I might be saying stuff out of order, but tbh it was an emotional ride so I’ll be surprised if I remember every little thing that happened. Her sister is a fan of BTS so my friend has some knowledge about them. She knows a few songs (she likes Fake Love) and knows some of the members (she likes Jin lol). So we got on the topic of BTS and she asked me to play Fake Love since that’s the one she knows the most. So I asked her if I could play a few more of their songs and she said “go ahead!”. So I played Mic Drop, Epiphany, Euphoria, Boy With Luv, etc etc etc and then I said “Oh, I’m gonna play Spring Day because it’s one of my fav songs by them and the mv always makes me cry.” She laughed and said “Okay!” So I put on Spring Day and the part I always cry at is at the end when they’re all walking on the field and harmonizing and it goes all slo-mo (you know which part I mean) and I also explained that only the mv version has it but the songs keeps going after they finish singing and it’s just harmonization. I was also trying to explain the meaning of the song to her. So the song finished and then Answer: Love Myself started playing and immediately I was like “This song always makes me cry because of the concert.” And she asked for me to elaborate. I’m not sure if I’ve ever said it on here but I saw BTS last year in Texas and that song was the last one on their setlist. So I went on and basically said something along the lines of: “Okay so last year was my second time seeing BTS and it was the end of the concert so obviously it was sad and emotional but idk what happened at the end but just hearing that song live really got me, as a warning I’m probably gonna start crying because it was for real extremely emotional for me. XX(friends name) in the chorus they sing ‘You’ve shown me I have reasons, I should love myself.’ and it was hearing that, seeing them right in front of me, and realizing this was the end of the concert that I just started crying. (at this point I was actually crying lmao) It was like a wave of emotions just completely overtook me and the tears were just flowing out. Girls around me were crying too. I remember looking around the whole arena and then back up at them that the tears just started falling harder. XX I started crying out for the members, namely Namjoon and Taehyung because they were the closest to me at the moment (I was in the pit). And I reached my hand out to them like that would actually do something, and I just kept sobbing and sobbing and sobbing. At this point my friend noticed I was crying and was trying to comfort me. But it was so....I can’t even explain it. It was thinking that this might be the last time I ever see them live and also thinking about how much they’ve done for me.” My friend was trying to comfort me but she couldn’t do much because she was driving lol but she urged me to go on. I told her that I am so dedicated to these boys that I am 100% getting a tattoo for them. I know at one point earlier she asked me who else I love as much as BTS and I said Day6 and The Rose ( I also want tattoos for them) and she also asked me if they were all drowning who would I save. I said I couldn’t pick and she said “you would let them all drown??” and I said “XX I would drown with them”. But in the end I told her that BTS is my top top group. I think it turned to her asking me if I could hang out with one of them who would it be and without hesitation I said Namjoon. She asked me if Jin was my favorite, why didn’t I say him. And then this is where the true mental breakdown happened. I’ll try to remember exactly what I said but no promises haha (also I was already crying from Love Myself but this convo just intensified it) “XX, you don’t understand how much I love Namjoon. Like it’s a different kind of love that I have for Jin. Jin will always and forever be my baby and my number 1 boy and will always be the first man I’ve ever fallen in love with, but with Namjoon...it’s a different kind of love. I love and respect him so fucking much, like he has gone through so much as a leader, as a person, and just in general. In the beginning he was the least liked member, which is so crazy right? Because he’s so loved now but it took him so long to get there. You remember what a fansign is right? Well this girl went to one and when she got to him, she said she got his photocard and he said “I’m so sorry”. Like really? He actually said that, and that just makes me so sad because he’s so amazing as a person and artist and he’s so smart and wonderful and creative and he does so so much for BTS. Namjoon /hated/ himself for so long and he has a song called ‘Reflection’ and one of the lines is ‘I wish I could love myself”. (at this point I was sobbing) And XX it breaks my heart every time I listen to that song. XX I love him so so much that if I could have ANYTHING in the world (im actually tearing up rn as I write this) it would to be able to tell him just exactly how much he means to me and how proud I am and how much I respect him. (At this point in the convo I choked up on saying that out loud). There was this video I saw of one of their concerts and I think it was towards the end when the cameras were going on each of the members and it came onto Namjoon and everybody was cheering so loud for him and he looked so confused! Until he turned around and realized that everyone was yelling and screaming for /him/. And XX he got so embarrassed and shy and that was the exact video and moment that I realized I have this intense love that I have for him. And I think that’s when he realized that he is really loved too. I actually don’t remember if it was before or after that video but in one of his songs he changed his line to “I do love myself.” Before I would always be like I love Namjoon so much yaaayyy, but I never really considered him a bias wrecker? But that video was the moment I knew that I have a different kind of love for him. And I don’t consider him a bias wrecker because Jin will forever be on top haha.” Guys when I say I was crying....I was CRYING. My friend was trying so hard to make me feel better and she was like “Please don’t cry, you’re gonna start making me cry.” And I was like “XX, these boys have honestly and truly changed my life and have helped me through so much. I discovered them through a friend and it was my first year of college and they have truly done so much for me. (this is where the convo got pretty dark). XX they have helped me through my happy days, my sad days, my depressed days and my truly lowest point days. When I say they have saved my life I honest to god fucking mean it. I promise you that if I never got into them, I would not be here today. I would’ve been gone long ago and I know it sounds dumb but they are the reason that I am still here today. (im crying rn typing this) The others( our other friends) know that I’m depressed but I don’t think they truly know to what extent. They’ve helped me through so much and that it’s okay to struggle and to not know what you want to do with your life. XX I’m still in the process of learning to love myself and for who I am and a bunch of other things” And at this point I was just trying to stop myself from crying because we were almost to our destination and I had to cleanup and stuff but the tears would not stop. I’ve always talked to my friends and sometimes on here about how much I love Namjoon and BTS but I’ve never really gone into depth about it, let alone said it out loud. That day in the car was the first time I truly poured my heart and feelings out about them. And even while writing this down I got teary eyed a couple of times and cried once. I’ve been a fan of BTS since 2015 and it has been a wild ride of emotions. They have taught and shown me so much and I can only dream about telling them how they have changed my life for the better. I’m not really sure why I wanted to write this down but I guess I wanted other fans to know that you are not “dumb” or “silly” or “over dramatic” for saying that a kpop group has helped your life. If you find that one special thing that makes you happy, then who the fuck cares what it is. As long as you know that that makes you happy and makes you forget about the world, then you hold onto that for as long as you need to. I’m not gonna sit here and say that my depression is cured and that my life is sunshine and rainbows and that everything is perfect now. I still have my off days, my low days, my days where I really truly just want to say goodbye to everything. But BTS, among other groups, have helped me realize that not everything in the world is bad, that you can have your happy moments in life that make you say “Maybe life isn’t so bad after all.”. All in all, I just wanted to share my feelings and let other people know that you’re not alone for thinking like this. And I know I’m not the only one who says that kpop has been that /thing/ for people. Anyway I guess this is all I have to say about this, I know I have more but I have too many emotions running through me right now lol. Your feelings are valid guys, and don’t let anyone try to convince you otherwise.

#bts #my post #im sure im missing a few details but thats okay

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