#i have to get out of my fucking rut i have to get the fuck out of my own head and stop feeling fucking sorry for myself because well

[illyrianbitch]

An Education in Malice — Part Four

Pairing: Vanserra!Reader x Azriel

Summary: With the sharp tongue of your notorious family, you are Azriel's most tantalizing challenge yet. It only takes one small meeting before you both realize that the line between hate and desire is dangerously thin.

Warnings: 18+ heavy making out and wandering hands, lots of bickering, sexual tension, threats, name calling, torture and wound descriptions, abuse, two emotionally dysregulated cunts tbh

Word Count: 7.7k

←Part Three

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

The air between you and Azriel had taken on a peculiar tension lately, some overwhelming, suffocating force that made you feel entirely too nervous for your comfort.  

Neither of you could ever pinpoint who made the first move— or rather, neither of you were willing to admit who did— but somehow, like clockwork, your dress was hiked up, his leathers were undone, and he was rutting into you from behind. It was always the same: a possessive grip on your waist, in your hair, or on your breasts, breath hot against your ear as he whispered words that only fueled the fire between you, responses to whatever comments you had made to rile him up.

It had become a distraction, this strange dynamic you created, that even Renard's interrogations had taken a backseat in lieu of it. It was proving increasingly difficult to get work done between fighting or fucking. 

The chamber was a dismal pit, darkness swallowing any hint of light that dared to enter. Moisture clung to the walls like a thick veil– the dirty, fetid atmosphere was tainted with the unmistakable stench of blood and other bodily fluids. You wrinkled your nose in disgust.

Azriel approached Renard, head cocking slightly to the side as his shadows danced around him— seemingly curious, excited almost. A twisted sense of satisfaction grew within you at the sight of Renard's pitiful state—starving, bloody, bruised, and desperate. 

Perhaps you should have felt some semblance of remorse or pity; even with how cruel Renard was, a compassionate soul should still feel a sense of guilt, a sense of sickness. But as you searched your body for it, as you attempted to muster it up, you came up empty handed. Instead, a rush of power surged through you. It felt like karma– well deserved karma.

You glanced at Azriel. There seemed to be a mirrored expression of satisfaction on his face, an unphased coolness to the situation before him. Even his shadows seemed at home, falling into familiar, rehearsed positions as he moved.  Deep down, something within you rested at the realization that he felt no remorse, either. 

“Is your plan to just stare at him until he confesses his secrets?”

Azriel could already anticipate the scowl on your face from the tone of your voice alone. He slowly turned his head to toss an unamused glare your way, hazel eyes momentarily scanning your figure. 

For the first time since this arrangement had begun, you were clad in something different, a departure from the usual dresses that adorned your form. The ensemble was a blend of regality and practicality, more akin to the attire of a warrior than a courtly lady— fitted pants and a tailored tunic, fabric adorned with subtle embellishments of autumn. It seemed as if Azriel wasn’t used to the sight yet— or he was entirely repulsed. You weren’t sure which, but you didn’t quite care, either. 

When his eyes met yours again, you gave him an impatient eyebrow raise, nodding towards Renard’s limp body. “Are you done checking me out yet?”

Azriel’s stare remained on you for a few more moments before he followed your line of sight back to the male before him. 

“Maybe if I didn’t have an incessant pest over my shoulder, I would be more successful.”

You stepped closer to him, a faint smell of night-chilled mist and cedar reaching your nose. “Maybe if you were actually good at anything besides harboring a grudge, you would’ve already been successful.”

Azriel didn’t move, didn’t so much as toss a glance your way as he responded, “Being a hypocrite isn’t a look fit for a lady.”

You let out an angry breath. 

Too much time had passed with Renard missing. Soon enough, your father was bound to get suspicious— and Eris was bound to get worried as well.  There wasn’t any doubt that Renard didn’t know much, not only because your father was a paranoid ruler, but because he failed to plan ahead more often than not. You didn’t need much information. All you needed was an idea of what Beron was planning, some inkling. Once you knew that, you could easily prevent it and ensure he didn’t gain any more power— ensure that Eris was set up to successfully overthrow him. 

But Azriel seemed to be taking his time, attempting to get other information about your court that could prove useful for the Night Court. 

“I think we’ve already established I’m past that title.”

Azriel looked at you. “Clearly.”

An all-too familiar simmering prickled at your skin and you clenched your jaw, matching the intensity of his glare with one of your own. 

Renard let out a weak chuckle, blood staining his teeth as he lifted his chin. 

“Listening to you two bicker is almost worse than the actual torture. You’re like a married couple. It’s pathetic.”

Azriel’s head snapped towards the male and a growl rumbled through the room. “Watch your mouth.”

But Renard only sneered, turning his bloodshot eyes to Azriel. “Big bad Shadowsinger, always lurking in the dark. Afraid to face your own inadequacies in the light, boy?”

Azriel’s eyes narrowed, tendrils of shadows now swirling around him, agitated, buzzing with a need to move. Renard offered a sickly, bloodied grin as he observed their movement. “No wonder you hide behind those shadows—they're the only things that can stand being around you.”

There was a pause as Azriel’s gaze grew predatory. And then a small, involuntary sound left your lips. 

It surprised you as much as it did Azriel, who turned to look at you with a furrowed brow and growing scowl. Your eyes widened a fraction at the sound, and within seconds, you let out a laugh.

The softness of it felt sinful, felt completely and utterly wrong— and something rippled throughout Azriel’s body at it, dug its way deep down into him until his wings felt slightly limp. From around his arms, his shadows slowed, coming to a curious, awe-filled stop. They began whispering, but he paid no attention. He pushed the foreign sensations away, his surroundings registering in his mind as he scowled.

“What the hell are you laughing at?”

You shook your head, another laugh escaping your lips at his face, contorted in frustration—  in an irritated confusion of being so caught off guard. His wings flared out, twitching slightly in response to the repeated sound.  “Nothing,” you said, “Your life just may be more pathetic than I thought if you’re getting psychoanalyzed by the male you’re torturing.”

Azriel’s irritation deepened as a grin grew on your face. “Shut up.”

A weak scoff drew your attention back to the bound male next to you. 

“You shouldn’t be laughing, princess.”  Renard’s eyes gleamed with malice as he shifted his gaze to you.  “Pretending to be tough, but the only reason you’re here is because you’re too weak to do anything on your own. Everyone knows Beron’s little girl is just a pathetic, needy bitch.”

The laughter died in your throat almost instantly, jaw clenching as your amusement quickly faded into a red haze of annoyance. A flame flickered at your fingertips. 

“Careful,” you warned. You moved to take a step towards Renard, but Azriel’s hand shot out instantly, stopping you with a firm grasp around your arm. 

You glanced down at where his hand met your body before pulling yourself away with a scowl. “Can you just do your job so we can kill him already?”

Your voice had a bitter, agitated edge to it now, a drawl that sounded more whiny than it did threatening. Azriel folded his arms, a gleam in his eyes as he responded with a mocking, “Why? Did he hit a nerve?”

You growled, watching as the edges of his lips turned up slightly— just enough for you to notice, just enough for that hint of an arrogant smirk to bother you. 

 “I think I preferred when you stayed quiet and sulked in your shadows.”

Azriel continued to stare at you, the ghost of a smirk still plastered on his face. A sense of annoyance prickled at your skin, mixed with something that tasted nauseatingly like embarrassment. Faintly, you felt the rush of heat threatening to spread to your cheeks. 

You clenched your jaw harder, gaze flickering from Azriel’s amused face to Renard’s bruised, snickering one. You landed back on Azriel with a sneer. 

“Wipe that stupid look off your face before I do it for you.”

Azriel watched in amusement as you stormed off, disappearing with another huff of annoyance and a vulgar gesture over your shoulder. 

Renard turned to him with a vile grin. “I have to ask. What’s she like, Shadowsinger? We’ve all wanted to fuck her. I bet she’s just as desperate in bed as she is—”

Azriel's expression darkened instantly, shadows swirling violently around him as he flared his wings out, poised and deadly. He held Renard by the throat, grip unyielding, siphons glowing angrily. His voice was deadly calm as he muttered, "I warned you to watch your mouth."

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

Only a couple hours had passed when Azriel found you again in the Spring Court, standing in the small house he’d grown strangely accustomed to. 

“You're here.”

You glanced over your shoulder, a sarcastic smile tugged at your lips. "Great detective skills on your part. Think you could use those with Renard?"

Unphased, Azriel rolled his eyes, the motion barely perceptible but unmistakable to someone who had spent as much time with him as you had. He moved with silent grace until he was standing right behind you, shadows hovering over his shoulders. 

"What's all this?"

His tone was flat as he took in the various items you had strewn across the table.

You shrugged, not bothering to turn around. "I brought some things so I wouldn’t need to keep going back and forth."

You could feel his presence behind you, the warmth of his body caressing over your skin as he leaned closer. Azriel's gaze landed on a leather-bound notebook among your belongings. 

"What's the notebook for?"

You stared at it for a moment, gingerly picking it up in your hands. There was a smirk on your lips as you turned to face him, face seemingly innocent and sweet. 

"All my private thoughts and hopes and dreams. At night, I sit with it and write in cursive letters, 'I hope the shadowsinger shuts the fuck up and stops being nosy.'"

Your voice started light, teasing, but as you finished the sentence, your expression hardened into a glare. Azriel seemed anything but amused, and a muscle feathered in his cheek. He gave no verbal response, opting to keep his gaze trained on you until you let out a huff of annoyance. 

He’d collected certain observations of you over the past few weeks. 

You rolled your eyes in almost every conversation he held with you. You smelled like a crackling fire and forest pine branch, something so similar to fresh fall air. He’d seen you sneer more than he’d ever seen you smile— which was once, today, as Renard commented on his shadows and apparent self-loathing. But most of all, you hated prolonged eye-contact. It made you angry, frustrated— flustered even. Azriel wouldn’t deny the satisfaction he felt every time he watched your jaw clench, watched the tinge of pink appear on the apple of your cheeks.

“What?” You snapped, glaring at him through your lashes. 

“Any particular reason you're more insufferable than usual?” 

An eye roll. “Bite me.”

“Hmm.” A slow, dangerous smile curved his lips. “Do you want me to?”

Your mouth parted for a fleeting second. And then you scowled, nose scrunching at the movement. “I brought this to keep track of everything I find out about my father and Koschei.” You shoved the journal into Azriel’s chest with a little more force than necessary.

Azriel frowned, catching it effortlessly. His shadows flowed to his fingers, gliding across the cover as he flipped it open. He glanced at you through his lashes, a single brow arching in question. “This is empty.”

“Point proven,” you shot back, “Go back to Renard and find something useful. We’re running out of time.”

He stood up straight, rolled his shoulders back, and narrowed his eyes at you. “I wasn’t aware we were on a deadline.” 

You chewed the inside of your cheek. Another sigh of annoyance left your lips. "Beron is bound to realize that Renard isn't on some drunken bender anymore. He's going to come looking. I don't want there to be anything for him to find."

Azriel's lips quirked in a small, humorless smile. "I think I'm capable of hiding a trail or two."

"Are you sure about that?" You narrowed your eyes. "Because you barely seem able to get Renard to do anything besides read you like a boring, sad, self-loathing book."

Azriel let out a scoff, glancing to the side as he threw the journal back onto the table behind you. You clenched your jaw at the movement, at the sound of the thud it created as it fell onto the wood. 

"Your insults are getting weaker, princess. Maybe you should take some lessons from him."

"Shut up," you snapped, the words coming out more petulant than you'd intended. 

He crossed his arms across his chest. Your eyes fell to his hands, to the siphons that beamed with color in front of you. His shadows followed the movement, gliding down his forearms and around his wrists.

“What would happen if Beron found out you were sneaking around? That you were holding Renard?”

His voice drew your attention back to his face, where his eyes were narrowed in on you in a deep, curious, almost unsure gaze. 

Your answer was swift, no hesitation. “He would kill me.”

Azriel wasn’t quite sure why his body reacted the way it did, why he felt himself flinch, why his wings seemed to twitch in discomfort. Whatever the reason, you noticed the reaction immediately, noting how his brows seemed to furrow ever-so-slightly—- a motion nearly minuscule for the normal eye, but you were talented at picking up these things. Years of blending in gave you such abilities— and weeks around Azriel made it easier to read his tells.

There was a feeling in your stomach that you couldn’t make out yet, but it was heavy and made you antsy. You broke eye contact, dropping your eyes to the ground as you absentmindedly kicked your shoe at some tracked-in dirt. 

“Don’t act so surprised,” you said nonchalantly, “My father has no ties to me beyond the unfortunate blood in my veins. I’m a bitch to be bred by the highest bidder.”

Something tightened in your chest as you paused for a moment. You blinked away the images that were flowing in through the corners of your mind. “I’m not worth any extra hassle.”

A silence followed. Your gaze was still on the ground, still on your black boots and the floor beneath you. A faint motion caught your eye and you watched as a tendril of Azriel’s shadow drifted to the ground— cascading down his ankle before it fell to the ground, stopping at your feet.

“I’d say,” Azriel murmured.

His words ran through you like a cold chill.

Azriel watched as something dark and fleeting passed through your eyes. You stood up straight, dropping your hands to grip the edges of the table as you leaned the small of your back against it. The faint smell of something burnt lingered in the air.

You tilted your head at him, gaze flickering between his eyes. And then a mocking, sly grin pulled at the edges of your lips. It felt unnatural. “Says the man who fucks me in the forest like a starved beast.”

Azriel’s hands slowly dropped from his chest. He took a step forward. A sense of tension crackled in the shared air, and you felt it within your stomach— a small flicker of fire.

“You let me.”

You shrugged. Heated pooled in your veins.  “A good fuck is a good fuck.”

Azriel’s lips curled into a smirk, and his hand reached out to trace up your arm. You tightened your grip on the edge of the table as the touch traveled through your skin. “It doesn’t bother you that it’s me?”

There was something inherently dangerous about the way he spoke, about the taunting, accusatory tone his words now dripped with. He traced the movement of his hand with his eyes, continuing a path up your arm. 

“I could ask you the same thing.”

His eyes flickered up to yours. You took a deep breath. 

“Truthfully?” He leaned in closer.  “I loathe it.”

His movements momentarily stilled, but you felt his shadows continue the path he’d started, felt as they slowly snaked up your arms. 

“Yet you keep coming back.”

His eyes darkened, and then he let out a soft, cool hum.  “A good fuck is a good fuck.”

By now, you were inches apart, the space between you a thin, taut with a suffocating tension that made it hard for you to breathe. His shadows slithered around you, caressing your skin so delicately you could’ve sworn it mimicked a lover's touch— their darkness wrapping around your neck, weaving themselves through strands of your hair.

You bit your lip, and Azriel's hand moved to your mouth, the pad of his thumb slowly pulling your bottom lip down. "You said you don’t care about Koschei,” he murmured, “That you just want to help your family.”

He released your lip, thumb resting on your skin as he held your chin in his hand.  He titled your head to his line of sight. “But Eris doesn’t know about Renard.”

"No, he does not.”

Your voice was quieter now, a low, soft tone that made Azriel almost groan in response. The feeling went straight through his body, coiling in his stomach and making his cock twitch. 

"Would he disagree with the methods?" 

Azriel’s lips were inches from yours, the space between you practically nonexistent. 

You frowned at the question, feeling your chest tighten as his mouth hovered near yours. Your knuckles turned white as your grip on the table turned iron, feeling the chipped wood beneath your fingertips. 

"He would disagree with me interfering so boldly with my father.”

"Because it would get you killed," Azriel stated.

"Yes.” 

His nose brushed against yours, and he met your gaze as his hand moved to wrap around the base of your neck. 

"You’re willing to continue this even if it risks your life?" 

You felt strangely exposed, naked in a way that you’d never felt before— not even when your clothes had been torn off and he was deep inside you, hands roaming your naked skin with a scorching touch and a ravenous mouth. This felt intimate. You didn’t like it. 

You traced the features of his face, his gaze still laser-focused on you, intense and wanting. He had a few freckles across his cheeks that you’d never noticed, and the flecks of green in his eyes were overshadowed by his dilated pupils. You took a deep breath, finding the courage to meet his heavy gaze once more. 

"Wouldn’t you do something similar?"

Azriel paused. A sense of conflict passed through his eyes as he pulled back slightly, just enough to scan your face entirely. 

"No," he finally said. He hesitated for a moment. "I’d do the exact same thing."

There was a beat of silence. You stared at one another, breaths turning heavy, ragged. Your heart thundered beneath your ribs. Before you could come to your senses, you closed the distance between you, wrapping your hands around his neck to pull him into you. Azriel responded eagerly, mouth slotting over yours with a natural, practiced ease. 

His hands fell from your neck, tracing down your waist until his palms gripped your hips, pulling your body further into his own. You let out a sound of pleasure at the feeling, at how his hands explored you, how the heat of his body seared against yours. You melted into his touch.

Azriel’s lips trailed along your jawline, and with a guttural groan, he  suddenly spun you around, pulling you back against him with a possessive force, his arousal pressing hard into your beck. 

The sudden change in position only fueled the haze in your mind and you placed your hands over his, following as he roamed over your curves. You threaded your fingers through his, roughly guiding his palm up your chest, moving to cup it over your breast. 

His lips nipped at your ear from behind.

"This change in wardrobe is interesting," he murmured, voice husky and rough with a delicious sense of desire.

You tilted your head slightly, reveling in the feeling of his breath against your skin. "Don't like it?" 

He chuckled lowly, his hands cupping your breast roughly. “Don't particularly favor how difficult it seems to take off."

The sensation of his touch sent a rush of heat coursing through you. Every inch of you burned with need— an all-consuming, humiliating need. 

Your eyes fluttered shut and you leaned into his touch, head falling back onto his shoulders as his lips found the skin beneath your ear. 

You raised a hand to tangle your fingers into Azriel’s hair, your eyes opening once more as his touch grew hungrier, rougher. 

The view of the table slowly came into focus. Your gaze fell to the notebook, its empty pages seemed to mock you with their blankness, and you blinked as a sense of sanity washed through you like a cold tide. 

With a jolt, you pushed yourself away from Azriel, prying his hands off your body as you broke the heated embrace.

Azriel blinked, shadows rushing back to him as if startled by the sudden pull away. His hair was tousled, lips still tingling from the kiss.

"What is it?" he asked, breathing heavy. 

You took a moment to compose yourself, patting down your disheveled hair with quick hands. "I’m bored. This isn’t doing it for me," you lied. You swallowed as Azriel’s stared at you with a furrowed brow. "Just go work on Renard."

You left no room for him to respond. Within the blink of an eye, you had disappeared from Azriel’s sight. 

His hands ran through his hair, attempting to shake off the lingering effects of the moment with you. The air still felt suffocating, still smelled of you and the sweet, addicting scent of your arousal. He scowled to himself.

His shadows slowly moved down his frame, falling to the ground and gliding across the floors. His eyes fell down to their movement, watching as they wrapped around a foot of the table, as they made their way up to the tabletop. 

He squinted at where they landed, reaching a finger out to the area that they traced. There, etched into the wood, was a faint outline of a burnt handprint— a perfect replica of your palm. 

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

Even with the familiar scene of pine and earth, returning home to the Forest House– to your court— never brought you a sense of comfort. But today, with the heat of your blush still spreading through your cheeks, you welcomed the quiet, empty halls. 

The soft patter of paws drew your attention as Laney approached with her head lowered. A small smile grew on your lips as she nudged you with her wet nose, but quickly the smile dropped as a small whine escaped her. 

Kneeling down, you gently ran your fingers across her coat. "What's wrong, girl?"

She only nudged your hand once more and turned, leading you deeper into the house.

A sense of foreboding settled over you as you followed her through the corridors. Your steps quickened when you spotted Flint lying outside Eris’s room. The dread in your chest grew heavier. Eris had a special connection to Flint. There were only a few situations in which he’d refuse the company.

Your face fell as you pushed the door to Eris’s room,  heart clenched at the sight before you. 

Eris sat on a small, velvet bench at the end of his bed, his head snapping back to the sound of his door opening. His expression quickly softened when he met your eyes, and you watched as his shoulders slumped.  “It’s just you.”

You gave him a small nod as he turned back around, your gaze falling to the blood-soaked shirt he wore, the crimson color spreading throughout the thin fabric. Flint and Laney pushed past you, paws pattering on the ground as they entered the room. A heavy feeling settled in your chest, something entirely dark and queasy. 

Eris grumbled as Flint neared him. “Shit. Y/N, close the godsdamn door.”

“I-” You snapped out of your daze, quickly closing the door before rushing over to him, gently pushing the hounds aside. “I’m sorry.”

You sat down next to him. “They just want to help you,” you said quietly. 

Eris sighed, a deep, weary sound. “I know. I just—”

Your eyes wandered to the hounds who had settled down nearby. Such regal, cunning, smart creatures. You’d never think them caring enough to sense such pain, yet here they were, eyes reflecting a deep understanding of the situation. Flint let out a small whimper, laying his head on his paws.

You looked back at Eris, slumped with his head in his hands, spine curved in a manner that made his wounds pour deeper into his shirt. A similar thought made its way through your mind. Your brother, regal and intelligent, a male who carried so much, who bore his father’s wrath time and time again– a male with a warm heart somewhere deep within the anger he radiated. The heavy feeling in your chest grew, began to fester into something fighting between fury, loathing, and suffocating sadness. 

“What happened?”

Eris didn’t lift his head, voice muffled by his hands. “He found me talking to my men. It wasn’t anything. Wasn’t about Koschei, wasn’t even about him.” 

There was an exhaustion in his voice that dripped with every word. 

“He was feeling particularly upset today,” Eris finished as he lifted his shirt, revealing the full extent of the damage. The lashes were deep, and you could see the dark, almost blackened edges where your father’s special concoction had seeped into the wounds. Eris bit back a groan, jaw clenched tightly.

That heavy feeling in your chest turned hot, burning— all consuming. So many things ran through your mind, overwhelming, crushing floods of emotions drowning your senses. 

You registered the anger first, the empty, crushing pressure of it, a feeling you’d grown too familiar with. Anger at your father, at the situation you were all trapped in, at the sheer unfairness of it all. 

And then it was guilt. Dark, suffocating, guilt. Renard missing had probably put your father on edge. Not only had you lied about it, kept it a secret, but you hadn’t been there when Eris needed you most. Instead, you’d been entangled with Azriel, a male who had no respect for you, for your family, who would so willingly watch your brother suffer. Selfish, selfish, selfish. 

You opened your mouth to speak, but nothing came out. There was nothing you could say, nothing that would make this situation okay, that would take away Eris’s pain– that would prevent it from happening all over again. You swallowed.

“Eris-” 

He lifted his head and turned to you a resigned expression, eyes slightly wide with desperation.  "I’m going to call it all off. We can’t meet with them now, not for a while.”

You didn’t need to ask for clarification, you already knew who he was talking about, what alliance he was referring to. You shook your head. “No, we need-”

"It’s too dangerous," he interrupted, voice urgent and pleading. "He’s watching everyone more closely now. If he finds out you're involved, I don't know what he'll do."

You shook your head faster, a hard sense of determination flaring in your chest. "We can’t, I can't. I need to figure something out. I need to help you."

Eris sat up straighter, grimacing at the motion as he reached out, his hand finding a firm but gentle on your wrist. "You need to stay safe, Y/N. Please. Nothing else matters."

You looked at him, brows furrowed and throat tight. Your strong, protective brother now reduced to pleading with you. You took a deep, ragged breath. “It all matters. I need to help you, okay? I need to make sure you have the upper hand."

Eris just shook his head, shook it so firmly and desperately that you could’ve sworn he was a teenager again, hand on yours as he scolded you for breaking something.

"Please," he repeated, his voice breaking. “Just listen to me."

A wave of helplessness washed over you, and now you felt small again, felt as if you’d shrunk in place. Your mind traveled back, throwing you into memories where you’d hide away from your father, fearing his disappointed hand, desperate for approval but receiving only pain. The same feeling bubbled in your chest.

You swallowed hard.  "I can't just stand by and do nothing."

Eris's eyes softened. "You want to help me? Stay safe.” 

You frowned, biting the inside of your cheek. The words you wanted to say caught in your throat. You couldn’t promise him that. You couldn’t lie. So instead, you turned your attention to his back, to the angry wounds that marred his skin. 

"Here, let me help you," you murmured. He gave you a long look, then nodded, slowly moving his body to expose more of his back to you. 

You moved your hand to his back. Heat surged through you, flickering at your fingertips. Your hands shook, trembled as you attempted to focus. You tried to channel it, to control that divine fire within you, but the energy was wild and unsteady. A self-loathing bite gnawed at you. 

"I can't—" you whispered, the words laced with frustration. 

Renard’s's taunting voice echoed in your mind. Too weak to do anything on your own.

Eris turned to look at you again, calm words breaking through the rising storm you felt inside your chest. "It's okay,” he said, “I can do it."

"I'm sorry.”

He shook his head at you, a small smile gracing his features. “There's nothing to be sorry for.”

There was something about the fact that he was able to smile, that he pulled such a gesture out for you, that made the bitter loathing inside of you spread even faster. 

"Just stay with me?” Eris asked. 

“Yeah,” you breathed. “Of course.”

With one hand, he held yours, and the other twisted over his back. You watched as his own hands began to heat up, glowing with a controlled, steady flame. 

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

All you felt was anger. All you saw was red.

Memories flashed in your mind, one after another. Eris’s bloodied wounds and the far-off look in his eyes, your mother hid away from the world and the echoes of her crying, being forced to clean the floors of your brother’s blood, your paralyzing inadequacies. It all twisted inside you, each image wrapping itself around your ribs, wounding itself tight enough to make you struggle to breathe.

You weren’t sure how you got here, but the smell of blood in the air tasted sweet on your tongue. Renard lay slumped in the metal chair. Despite his appearance, a mocking grin spread across his split lips as you entered.

“Come back for more, have you?” 

The sight of him, significantly more battered than the last time you’d seen him, brought a welcomed sense of satisfaction. At your sides, you clenched your fists until they were white. 

“I’m done playing,” you said, your voice a low, dangerous growl. “Tell me what you know.”

Renard’s grin widened, a cruel glint in his eyes. “I'm trembling in fear,” he mocked, “What's a dolled-up whore like you going to do?”

Something inside you snapped. 

With a snarl, you lunged forward, hands slamming down onto the metal chair. All the anger, all the pain, everything you’d been holding back, surged through you. The metal beneath your palms began to heat up, the sensation almost soothing in its intensity— cathartic, even. 

Renard’s eyes widened. “I already told you both, fuck, I already gave you all I know!” he shouted, painful groans leaving his mouth as the hot metal below him began to bite at his exposed skin. “We don’t know anything.”

“You’re a liar!” 

In the back of your mind, you grasped at your resolve, grasped at the strength you needed to keep your desperation hidden— all attempts proved futile. You grabbed Renard’s neck, fingers digging into his flesh as a simmering heat radiated down your arm. “Tell me what you know!” 

Renard’s screams filled the room, his body writhing in agony. “I don’t—” he choked out, voice hoarse with pain. You stared at your hand, stared at the flicker of flames that began had to grow, watched as they moved to Renard’s skin–

But before the flames could fully spread, black smoke enveloped your wrist, wrapping around it with a smothering, extinguishing touch. 

Not smoke—shadows. 

A hand grabbed you next, pulling you back with a rough hand. 

You pulled against the familiar grip. “Let me go, you foul-bred animal!” 

Azriel’s voice was a low growl in your ear. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

You struggled against him, but his hold was firm. 

Within a blink, you were winnowed to an open area in the forest, the sudden transition leaving your senses reeling. A cool breeze brushed against your skin, carrying the scent of pine and damp earth. You blinked. And then you pushed Azriel off, staggering back with the force of the motion. Your heart pounded with residual fury, a trickling sense of adrenaline still coursing through your veins. 

“What do you not understand about 'let me go'?” you spat, “Is there something in those bat genetics of yours that makes you lose brain functioning at random intervals?”

Azriel’s didn’t budge. “Do not go back there.”

“You don’t tell me what to do, Shadowsinger. I think it’s time I handle this on my own.”

“Handle it?” he echoed, his shadows curled at his fists. “You were about to burn him alive, losing control like some child throwing a tantrum.”

The color drained from your face. “And you’re the expert voice on self-control?”  The taste of resentment lingered on your tongue, sour and sickly familiar. “Where was this energy when you slaughtered and tortured my brother’s men? When they were being controlled, when they knew nothing?”

Azriel’s wings twitched almost imperceptibly. Your voice fell slightly to a tone lower, more raw. 

“Was what I was doing truly that bad, or do you only care that it’s me doing it?”

There was a beat. Azriel looked away before finding your eyes again. He shook his head, a small scowl on his face. “What are you implying?”

Something inside you shifted as you stared at him, every detail seemingly magnified, as if your emotions had sharpened your perception at last. You’d noticed this intensity around him, wrote it off as the thrill of an adversary. But you realized now, as Azriel stood before you, that he was something else entirely: a stark embodiment of everything you loathed, everything you sought to avoid, and everything you secretly craved. 

He wielded cruelty with impunity, praised for his ruthlessness, while his family basked in the warmth of love and freedom, despite their own moral shortcomings. And now he stood before you, a bastard-born nobody who had stumbled into luck, blind to anything beyond his own skewed perceptions. 

There was a defiant, knowing glint in your eyes, as if something had been confirmed— as if that you'd found the answer to some question you’d asked for centuries. 

“You are so desperately searching for some confirmation that I am as horrible as you’ve made me out to be.”

Azriel's eyes narrowed slightly. His demeanor remained outwardly composed, a practiced facade of stoicism and indifference, but the glow of his siphons gave him away. 

“You have no idea what you’re talking about.”

You raised an eyebrow, fists slowly unfurling at your sides. Your breath was more even now.

“I understand more than you think. You’ve been waiting for me to slip, to prove that I’m just like—” 

“Beron.”

You paused, slighting flinching at how much contempt was fit into one word.

Eris. You were going to say Eris. Not Beron. Not your father. 

A flash of hurt crossed your face and something in Azriel’s chest tightened. His shadows fell into a frozen wreath around his arms. 

“Right,” you scoffed, moving to brush past him. “Then I better do a good job and prove you right.”

Azriel stopped you with a casual sidestep, wings flaring out to block your path further.  “Do not go back there.”

“I will do whatever the hell I please,” you hissed, meeting his gaze defiantly. There was a burning hatred in your eyes that he’d never felt before, something more foul and rotten than what had been there before. 

Azriel’s jaw clenched even further as he let out an angry breath. The strength of your gaze alone triggered his hand to instinctively wander to the dagger on his hip, to the cool steel of Truth-Teller. His shadows curled around his fingers, threading through them as if calling him back to reality. He blinked, and then pulled his hand away, flexing it as he looked at you once more.

“Why?” 

Azriel's voice was probing, his gaze searching—  scanning your face with a scrutiny that made you itch. 

“Why what?”  you snapped back, your tone sharper than you intended, the itch spreading, making you want to pace or scream, anything to shake off his intense stare, to rid yourself of the tightening in your chest.

“You’re desperate. This wasn’t as thought out as you tend to be.”

You let out a dry, humorless laugh, feeling the sound scrape against your throat. "Because you know me so well?" The words felt like ash on your tongue, a bitter taste lingering in your mouth.

“Yes,” he stated simply, his eyes piercing into yours still. “We’re allies. Explain yourself.”

"I was just trying to pick up your slack and get information." The lie rolled off your tongue naturally.

But Azriel wasn’t buying it. "No, that’s not it," he countered, "We’re working for the same side. There is no reason for you to go off like this."

You gritted your teeth, the pressure making your jaw ache.  “We are not working for the same side.”

“We have an alliance.”

His calm demeanor only fueled your frustration. Your hands fell into a familiar position at your side, curled into tight fists, your nails biting into your palms.

“Your alliance with Eris is to support him when he takes over the throne. But when it comes to Koschei, there is no doubt in my mind you’re willing to undermine your allies to get rid of his threat. And in doing so, you’ll endanger me and my family.”

Your voice was rising, the words spilling out in a rush of pent-up emotion. “ I want to— I need to know everything before any moves are made. My brother needs an edge to stay ahead, and he sure as hell isn’t going to get it if he’s playing by the rules and having to defend his every move because of this stupid agreement.”

Azriel’s jaw tightened, his eyes darkening to near black. “Eris wouldn’t need to defend himself if he wasn’t a vile snake.”

Rage boiled through you, its fiery grip yanking onto your stomach and your chest.The intensity of it casted a hazy glow, distorting your vision with its searing heat.

“I am fed up with your little group thinking that we need to beg for your forgiveness. Tell me, does it get cold on all of that moral high ground? Does the high horse ever get uncomfortable?”

You stepped closer to him, pushing against his chest with your finger, the contact sending a jolt up your arm. Azriel's hand shot out, gripping your wrist tightly.

 "Perhaps Eris feels the need to beg for forgiveness because of the acts he’s committed.”

“And what has he done? Besides refusing to give in to every whim?” 

You tried to yank your hand free, but his grip held firm. Your pulse pounded in your temples, a steady, throbbing beat. You felt that familiar prickling feeling grow across your skin, a simmering fire creeping up your arm.

“He left Morrigan in those woods to die.”

He dropped your hand, the action almost dismissive, as if he couldn’t bear to touch you anymore. You pulled it back into you and took a step back, shaking your head. Of course. The thought echoed in your mind, bringing a bitter realization that settled like a stone in your stomach. 

“It always comes back to that, doesn’t it?” 

Azriel’s expression hardened, centuries of a grudge etched into every line of his face. His shadows danced around him, dark tendrils coiling and writhing like live fire across his body. You felt it radiating off him in waves— a palpable hatred that made your skin prickle. It was a feeling so intense you wondered how he had managed to lessen it before, how he could bear to be inside you, even with you turned away.

“My brother didn’t put that nail in her. He didn’t touch her at all.”

Azriel’s eyes were hard as steel. “He left her there. Naked, scared, and dying.”

“He gave Morrigan mercy in the only way he knew how.” 

“You call that mercy?” 

“Yes! Eris was just as much of a child as Morrigan was.”

Every word felt rancid now, burned like bile in your throat, fueled by a protectiveness born from years of standing by your brother's side. You stepped closer to Azriel, not bothering to hold back the flames that now licked at your skin. His shadows coiled around his arms, formed an almost protective barrier around his clenched fists. 

“Do you know what my father would have done had Eris touched her, helped her at all? He didn’t take lightly to the disrespect and humiliation she passed. He would have made a public show and slaughtered her. Just as he later did with Jesminda.”

Azriel stayed quiet, stayed eerily still as he watched you. You didn’t expect a response. A new emotion curled itself into your gut, something much heavier than anger, than rage. You thought about Eris, thought about the lashes on his back, thought about how he used to stay awake at night to wander the halls, listening outside of your parent’s chambers in case your mother needed help. You thought about how he’d helped you bury Jesminda, how he’d kept a figurine of Lucien’s to give to you. 

No matter what he did, or what you did for him, he would never be free— not truly. Not from his past and the assumptions people have made of him. He would always be cruel. And you, in association, would always be evil. Vile. It was in your family's nature. You felt foolish for thinking otherwise, for not learning how to take your rage and make it something useful, forge it into a weapon, train it like a beast to eat the remaining shreds of your empathy.

Eris deserved better. He was better than Rhysand. He was better than the male that stood before you. 

"But none of this matters to you," you continued, your voice tinged with bitterness and resignation. "Even if it's the truth.”

Azriel’s wings twitched. You didn’t need further confirmation that your words held true. He would never accept a version of that night besides his own, because a version that included the truth would force him to see Eris as something other than a wicked, evil male. As long as your brother was worse than Azriel, as long as there was someone worse than him, he’d never have to face the fact that he wasn’t as good of a male as he claimed to be.

"You make excuses for your brother, but where are yours?" Azriel finally spoke. "You've done cruel things. You've hurt people. Killed people." His gaze flickered to your fists wreathed in flames. "Burned them alive," he added.

The fire at your arms grew in response to his words.  You cocked your head. And then you ignored him. "You threatened my life. At that High Lord’s meeting—  you lost control, put my brother in a chokehold, and threatened my life."

Azriel's nostrils flared and his siphons began to shine with a dangerous, angry glow. 

"I dare you to live up to your word, Shadowsinger," you challenged, taking a slow step towards him. "I'm here. I've been here.” His eyes traced your every movement. 

“And yet, you've just fucked me."

There was a flicker of something in his eyes, a mix of anger and shame that he quickly masked behind a veil of indifference. But you saw it, felt it, reveled in it.

"You're weak, Azriel," you said, voice low and calm. "A slave to your anger, to your impulses, to your High Lord. You have always been weak."

He blinked at the sound of his name falling from your lips, a wave of uncertainty washing through his face. But his eyes stayed on you, still burning, still angry. They simmered hotter now, heavier with a new strain of contempt. 

Your breath escaped in a half-hearted chuckle. "It's a pity," you said, shaking your head slightly. Your flame dwindled to a faint firefly glow. "To see such a pretty face marred by blind devotion."

With one final glance, you turned on your heel and winnowed away. You didn’t see Azriel again for two more weeks. 

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

←Part Three

guys.... the next part is one of my favorites tehehehe cause its mainly just azriels perspective and where his mind is at. PLUS this is where those content warnings start to get lighter :DDDD

permanent tag list 🫶🏻: @rhysandorian @itsswritten @milswrites @lilah-asteria @georgiadixon

@glam-targaryen @cheneyq @darkbloodsly @pit-and-the-pen

azriel tag list: @thisiskaylin @serrendiipty

#azriel x reader #azriel #azriel x you #azriel x y/n #azriel x reader angst #azriel fanfic #azriel fanfiction #azriel shadowsinger #azriel spymaster #azriel acotar #acotar fanfic #azriel angst #a court of thorns and roses #acotar fanfiction #acotar #acotar x reader #malice series

[thrasherella]

Needy Werewolf Husband is going into his rut and is really, reaallllyyyyy trying to get his wife's attention away from the household chores she's insisting on finishing before he can have his way with her...

...

He followed her all around the kitchen as she tidied up, wrapping his arms around her from behind and groping her tits as she cleaned the few dishes in the sink, pinching and teasing her nipples as she sighed and moaned, grinding his hard cock into her soft ass, his breath hot and voice desperate against her ear as he begged her to let him fuck her already.

"Please let me put it in..." he whined, nipping at the shell of her ear lightly in frustration as his swollen, red cock throbbed against her, begging for more attention, for more friction, for more anything; he felt like he was starting to lose his mind.

She had told him to keep humping her ass like a horny little puppy if he couldn't wait, and he really couldn't. He continued fondling her breasts, palming and squeezing them in his massive hands, and she whimpered and mewled, rolling her hips back against his.

"See, you want it too..."

She continued to deny him as she finished wiping and organizing the kitchen counters, his cock dribbling all over her backside as he pumped against her, unable to stop himself. He needed to pin her down, needed to stuff her full of his cock; he could smell her arousal mounting as she ground that perfect little ass back against him, her honeyed scent driving him absolutely wild.

"Just a little longer love, you're being such a good boy," she cooed, scratching him gently under his chin as he made puppy dog eyes at her, eliciting from him a low, humming moan.

He humped her legs while she vacuumed the living room, whimpering and growling as she did her best to ignore him, slowly and methodically making her way across the room as he ground into her, dragging and rubbing his cock against her, staining her clothes with his sticky precum, nipping at the back of her neck and ears, demanding her attention.

"Please, need to fuck you now baby, need to fill you; need to empty my cock into your perfect little pussy and give you a litter of pups..."

"Be a good boy and wait until I'm done cleaning the bedroom, okay?" she had purred, and he whimpered a weak agreement in response.

When they got to the bedroom however, she was helpless against him as he shoved her face first down onto the mattress, ripping apart those pesky little shorts and panties that had been blocking his aching cock, confirming what he already knew from her overwhelming scent that her cunt was already drenched and waiting for him to stretch and fill her.

"I lied," he huffed, mounting her from behind and lining up his dripping cockhead with her pussy, parting her nether lips slowly around him, loving how she moaned into her pillow as he did. "I don't wanna be a good boy; and you were a bad girl, it's not nice to tease a rutting wolf...now you be good, and take my knot," he hilted into her in one hard thrust, feeling her pussy clenching around him; a low, rumbling growling escaping his throat, and a deliciously muffled scream coming from her as he knotted her, forcing every inch of himself into her tight cunt.

He was already so overstimulated, biting down into her shoulder as he came, painting her insides white as he filled her with his thick load, and she cried out as her own orgasm crashed over her, hips bucking and rolling against him, squirting her climax all over his dick and pooling on the bedsheets.

"That's a good girl," his breath was hot against her ear, pushing her hips up slightly to get one clawed hand between her and the mattress, flittering and rubbing his fingers against her swollen clit, loving how she writhed and squirmed beneath him helplessly. "No more chores, no where for you to go, sweet thing stuffed and stuck on my knot...just be a good girl and turn off your brain, and squirt on my dick again, and again, and again while I make you my cum-dumpster..."

She couldn't deny this was exactly what she wanted...she knew her husband better than anyone and knew that denying him was a sure fire way to make sure he took extra time to "punish" her for the time she had wasted keeping him waiting.

Oh no, what a tragedy that would be...

#monster #monster bf #monster boyfriend #monster smut #werewolf bf #werewolves #werewolf #werewolf husband #werewolf lover #teratophillia #tetrophilia #monster lover #monster fuqqer #monster fucker #monster fudger #werewolf fucker #werewolf smut #werewolf rut #monster x human #monster x girl #monster romance #monster boy #monsters #werewolf x human #werewolf x girl #pwp fics #pwp

[voxisdaddy]

Collection of Pleasure

Hazbin Hotel NSFW Headcanons…

Fandom: Hazbin Hotel

Pairings: Alastor | Lucifer | Vox | Valentino | Velvette | Charlie | Vaggie | Cherri Bomb | Rosie | Carmilla | Adam | Lute | Emily | Saint Peter

C/TW: 18+, NSFW, MDNI, reader written as fem, cussing, various kinks, collection of a few subs x dom!reader, mainly the ladies are domming/topping lol, not proofread, some are bad im sorry, carmilla has two though bc its carmilla

In which in at least one NSFW headcanon for each character...

My personal NSFW headcanon for several Hazbin Hotel characters. This includes some of the main cast, the Vee’s, the angels, and some of the other characters ♥︎

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Alastor likes being the predator chasing his prey during his rut...

Sex with Alastor is pretty rare, happens occasionally but usually it's for special occasions like an anniversary. His ruts however? His favourite thing to do (aside from you) is have you run around the forest in his room while he hunts for you in his demon form. He can very easily catch you but he likes to let it play out before he pounces on you for like, two weeks. Goodluck lol

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Lucifer is an insatiable beast...

When he started crying and was quivering so bad one night, you thought that enough was enough and climbed off of him only for his hips to desperately follow you, thrusting into nothing. Despite his tears from the overstimulation you've given him for several rounds by then, he looked at you with teary eyes and begged you to not stop. A safe word was set in place because of that, so you made sure when to stop when he genuinely wanted you to stop. But despite how teary eyed he gets or how much he begs, he never uses it.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Vox likes to watch himself...

"Oh you mean like in front of a mirror?" NO. Well yes but actually he loves getting it on with you in his office because all his monitors will showcase how well you're either riding his dick or fucking his ass with a strap. A few monitors will display his weeping face though thanks to you. He thinks it's humiliating and will try and change them to literally anything else but he can't exactly focus on anything when he's so lost in pleasure. So his weeping face and him getting railed it is. It's like he's your own porn star. This porn star whimpers "mommy" too so have fun with that.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Valentino is capable of getting fucked dumb...

I know it might be hard to believe with him, but it is possible and it's why he's so obsessed with you. He's very experienced in sex, obviously; doming, subbing, top, bottom, doesn't matter. It's all good. The way you can somehow fuck him so good and bring him to so much overstimulation that all he can do babble incoherently? Mans is down bad for you and grows more romantically attached to you than he thinks. Often times the night after a particularly passionate and heated session, he heads to the studio with a slight limp in his step. The first time people saw him limping like that paired with his surprisingly decent mood that day, they knew; oh you're fucking good.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Velvette is a pillow princess...

I 100% see her as a dom, and she very well can dom, but she's selfish and wants all the pleasure with minimal work. With the way she acted, especially when it comes to teasing you, it really through you in a loop when you got to bed that evening. Okay so you're topping-no big deal. The real surprise was when you found out she didn't wanna do anything to help you get off. Oh well. Sitting on her face and using a vibrator against her clit is motivational enough for her to pleasure you too.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Charlie has a little bit of an exhibitionist kink...

a little bit. Kind of? Okay but you know the large window in her room we see her by in episode 1? Has rode your strap and/or fucked you with a strap right in front of that baby. Granted it's pretty high so not like anyone can easily look in anyways but it's still just not private enough that it does something to her. If she's ever potentially really ticked off sometimes she'll eat pussy aggressively while you're pressed, bare tits and all, against the glass.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Vaggie likes titi's...

Whether your big breasted or sporting itty bitties, her hands immediately go to fondle them during heated make out sessions. She's kinda shy in the bedroom so don't take her boldness to grope your chest as her being dominant-she just can't help herself from groping you. Sometimes after sex she'll kiss your chest. Depending on where she kisses and if she'd biting or not, it may lead to another round.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Cherri Bomb is the only person who can rival Lucifer over…

Eating pussy. Whether your sitting on her face or her head is buried between your plush thighs, my girl loves to eat. And she eats like her life depends on it. Even when you think she may need a breather and try to move she’s very quick in pulling you back and keeps you there firmly, often smirking when you’re overstimulated and squirming.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Rosie loves thighs...

Call her old fashioned (cuz she is) but seeing your exposed thighs just does something to her. I mean how scandalous! She spends a majority of her time in Cannibal Town which is trapped in the 1910's. Everyone is dressed in only the most stylish and modest clothing from that time period. So if you ever come strutting about, publicly or privately, in a little something that exposes more of your figure and especially your thighs, expect to have dozens of hickeys decorating your inner thighs by the next day.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Carmilla always says she has no favourite sex position but she does...

it's 69. She prefers to be at bottom since it makes it easier for her to finger you while simultaneously assaulting your clit with her tongue. And of course while you're down there she likes to keep you trapped with her thighs. Because i mean look at them thighs!!! MMHHMMM!!! I see her leaning more towards dom so like, if you're able to focus on eating her out without getting distracted as little as possible then she'll reward you good.

I have two for Carmilla that I desperately want to share so here's my second one; she loves having you keep her strap warm while she does paperwork. Just you sittin pretty on her big plastic dick, occasionally gripping your thigh when you squirm too much. Will play with your clit if you're being needy-try not to squirm too much though or else you ain't getting anything once she'd done her work for the day.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Adam secretly cherishes your more intimate sex...

As much as a dick (master) this guy is, he definitely has his vulnerable side. During some make up sex after an argument and temporary separation that could have very easily lead to your guys break up, he found himself unusually emotional as he was balls deep in ya. He didn't cry, as if he'd allow himself to do that especially at a time like sex, but he felt it. The pull at his heart strings, the relief that washed over him that you two were still together, the way your lips uttered his name like a prayer., It was a surprise to him and one he'll never forget.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Lute cums surprisingly fast via fingering...

You found this out when opting to use your fingers to do the job over the dildo, strap, and vibrator. She already knew she came fast via fingering but didn't want anyone to know that-she came almost embarrassingly fast and it sometimes felt like it wouldn't stop. This hit her ego a little bit considering that she's stubborn as all hell but she could barely defend herself when she kept cumming around your fingers. Safe to say you had quite a lot to lap up that night.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Emily gets wet easily...

is it really that surprising? You found this out when you were kissing at her neck and reached down to her uplifted dress and felt that slick wet feeling between her legs. She was very flustered and even more when you teased her for getting this wet over a few neck kisses-there was only one hickey (so far).

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Saint Peter has a thing for light bondage...

Nothing hard obviously but his wrists being bound together or to the bed via rope or handcuffs gets him going. It puts him in a position where he's completely at your mercy. Blindfolding him is on the table as well-his other senses are heightened as fuck making him react more enthusiastically to your touches and whispers. Even though he's into it it's also a double edges sword cuz this guy needs to touch you and not even being allowed to look at you either has him whining.

This has been in my drafts for weeks lol some of these aren't to my personal standards but I was really running out ideas that were both fitting to the character and weren't too basic/a repeat of another's. I didn't wanna exclude some people from my original roster so I toughed it out lol

sometimes my posts get shadowbanned for literally no reason and at random so it would mean the world if you reblogged this thank you <3 no pressure tho!

#hazbin hotel #x reader #vox #saint peter #st peter #hazbin hotel x reader #alastor #lucifer #lucifer morningstar #lucifer magne #adam #lute #emily #rosie #cherri bomb #vaggie #charlie #charlie morningstar #velvette #velvet #valentino #charlie magne #carmilla #carmilla carmine

[satorusugurugurl]

Weak Spot

Summary: Cuddling on the couch leads to a fascinating discovery.

Pairing: Choso Kamo, Gojo Satoru, Ryomen Sukuna (Modern AU), Nanami Kento, Geto Suguru, Fushiguro Toji, FAB!Reader

Word Count: 4,141

Warning: horny reader, whimpers, moans, trying to stay quiet, accidental orgasms, tickling, roughhousing, foot massages, foot play if you squint?? Hair pulling, public smexy stuff, hugging, of weak spots

A/N: Just a quick series of blurbs with JJK men finding your weak spots thank you for all of your suggestions!!

**MDNI!!**

Choso Kamo:

The evening you had started as a quiet one. You and Chosi sat on your couch watching some rom-com you had picked out. You’re fully invested in the film, lying on your side munching away at popcorn as Choso lies behind you, his arms wrapped around your waist. His eyes are heavy, and he drops his head to your shoulder with a tired hum.

There was nothing out of the ordinary when he did that. Resting your chins on each other's shoulders was something both of you often did—sort of a silent way of expressing the love the two of you shared. But, the second Choso rubs his chin over the spot where your shoulder meets your neck, you cry out, covering your mouth.

At first, your boyfriend freezes up, eyes widening at the sound leaving your lips. For a moment, Choso thought that maybe he had hurt you, but as he felt your trembling against him, he knew that’s not the case. You moaned so loud like you did when he would fuck you. That reaction made him move his chin harder over the same spot. The moan that leaves your mouth has his cock twitching in his pants as your body rocks back.

“C-Cho—w-waah!” He rubs harder, his large hands leaving your waist to cup your breasts gently. “Ah—fuck, nnngh.” The way your body jerks as if you’re trying to escape his grasp has him groping you harder, pulling your back into his chest. “Choso, h-hold on a second baby.”

“I found it.” His gruff voice whispers over your neck, causing goose flesh to rise over your arms. “Found your weak spot.”

“B-Babe—ah~ wait~!” Your boyfriend's hands grope your hips, his chin digging into your sweet spot as his hips rut against your ass. “C-Cho-Choso.”

Your boyfriend hums in approval. Hearing you get off without him even touching you between the legs fills him with a certain sense of pride. The strange new feeling has him rubbing circles into your sweet spot with the tip of his chin. The pressure, gentle rubbing, and the feeling of his hot breath against your skin have you pressing your thighs together.

You were crying out softly, whimpering into the back of your hand. The sensations and stimulation to your neck had a pleasure twisting in your lower abdomen, your underwear soaked. All of it felt so good, but it wasn’t enough to send you over the edge just yet; it was the feeling of Choso’s hardening erection that had you teetering on the edge like you were a tightrope walker.

“Haaah~ oh fuck.”

Chiso chuckled deeply, “Yeah, you want more.” He digs his chin into that spot on your neck, and you can even form words.

“Ngggh! Hah! Fuck~ c-cumming—c-cumm—” One of your hands reached back, turning at his dark locks of hair, while the other clawed at the cushion of the couch as your orgasm hit you.

Your boyfriend opens his mouth to speak but can’t even begin to find the words to say. His focus is drawn to you. You’re shaking; legs pressed firmly together as you tug a bit harder on his hair with each wave of the orgasm you ride.

“O-Oh fuck,” you whine, feeling his breathing heavily, “I-I can’t believe I just—nngh!” Yours flipped so your face is pushed against the sofa, and Choso is scrambling behind your, yanking your sweats down as you feel his hard cock rutting over the curve of your ass.

“So hot; need to feel you do that again, but this time on my cock, okay?” His voice is desperate, shaking, and full of horny desire. “Is that okay, honey?”

“More than okay; give it to me, Cho~!”

Gojo Satoru:

A black blindfold flew past your head as you squeaked, turning the corner into the living room. “I-I said I was sorry!” You squealed happily as your boyfriend followed close behind. “I didn’t know you were ticklish on your ribs! I swear! I promise!!” You don’t even come close to meeting the front door as you’re gently tackled to the soft rug.

“That’s the last time I ever let my infinity down around you!” He playfully growls as he crawls on top of you, fingers wiggling around your face. “In the meantime. I do believe some form of payback is due!”

You can’t protest because his fingers are tickling your sides. “Ah! No! Hahah!” You scream, kicking your legs out as you’re trying to strip his hands from tickling against your rib cage. Every attempt you make to stop him is thwarted as it easily evades your grasp.

Long fingers that you usually love, we’re now you’re the mortal enemy. They move against your cage, tickling every spot that you weren’t sure if Gojo assumed they were or if the bastard was using Six-Eyes to his advantage. Because each time his fingers grazed over your rib cage, which also happened to be your weak spot, you squirmed underneath your boyfriend. You tried to hide the moans with laughter; it was useless because, despite desperately trying to hide them, your squirming legs were all Satoru needed to see.

He kept his fingers moving, tickling you faster, smirking as you bit down on your bottom lip. “Mmmnngh!” your friend is trying to free himself. “Satoru! Stop! Please!” you cried out in between laughs and moans.

“Why?” he cooed with a smirk, “Why do you want me to stop, sweetheart?”

“B-Be—aha!” Your back arched as your mouth dropped. “I-I ah!”

“Is it because you're getting all hot and bothered?”

“No!”

“You’re a liar~”

“Mmmm fuck! Ooooh fuck!” Your chest heaved as you shook underneath him, his hips slotting between yours as the smell of musk and clean linen invaded your senses, making you feel high. Off of the pleasure, the tension, everything just seemed to enhance the pleasure that was pulsating in your pussy. “Fuck!”

“Hehe! Someone’s gettin’ all wet and turned on~!”

“T-Toru!”

“Yeah~? Want me to fu—”

“C-Cumming!”

Your body arched, shaking as your friend clamped your thighs together, but Satoru’s body stopped you from doing so. Just allowing you to kick your legs out, toes curling as you cummed hard. Satoru’s face turned a bright red as he pulled his hands away from your ribs. You lay there on the ground panting heavily, covering your eyes with your forearm, the shame of what just happened fostered inside your chest.

Satoru was silent for the longest moment, his eyes meeting yours as he sputtered and blinked, a trickle of blood running from his nose. “D-Did you just cum?” you could only groan, nodding once.

“T-Tickling my ribs, I-it’s my weak spot ass.”

“O-Oh—” you both sat in silence, “uhm sweetie.”

“Huh?” you pulled your arm away, “what?”

Satoru started tugging your leggings down, panting like a feral animal. “Let me tickle you again with my cock inside of you!” you squeaked as he pounced on you grinding his hips against yours. That night, you both learned that Satoru had a bit of a tickling kink and that you were happy to serve him.

Ryomen Sukuna (Modern AU):

“Are you sure about this?” your boyfriend asked gently as he took a marker and marked where your cartilage piercing was going to go.“You're okay with me piercing you?”

“You were perfectly fine piercing me last night.” you waggle your eyebrows at him before taking your bottom lip between your teeth as he deadpans.

“That was with my cock, this is a big ass needle that’s gonna be stabbed through your fucking ear.” He gently holds your earlobe, giving it a gentle tug. “Dor—”

“Mmm!” Your eyes go wide as your hands fly up to cover your mouth. Your earlobe is being held between Sukuna’s thumb and index finger. His eyes are slightly wide as he stares at your ear in stunned silence.

Crimson eyes search your face as if looking for the answer as to why you made such a sexual noise over him, touching your ear. But you don’t say anything, your eyes darting around his workspace at the tattoo shop. Slightly annoyed by your lack of attention, focused on him. Your boyfriend narrows his eyes before giving your earlobe another sharp tug.

“Nnngh!!” you moan into the palms of your hands, trying to silence the noise that threatens to escape.

Noticing that your eyes are still averted from his, Sukuna gently runs his fingers up your ear, caressing it slowly and sensually, as if it was your pussy that he teased and edged the night before. With each stroke of his black, gloved finger, you twitch and turn against his chair, your hands clamping down harder over your mouth.

Your boyfriend stands up, crawling up onto the chair with you, his leg strategically placed on either side of your hips, trapping you underneath the large frame of his body. His eyes darken with lust as he rubs his finger back down to your earlobe slowly back up. The way you arched slightly against the covered black chair had his cock tightening in his pants; his breathing was heavy as he pulled his hand away.

“Fuck,” you gently whisper into the room, finally removing your hands. “Kuna, uhm may—e-eegh!” you get your teeth as your boyfriend leans his tattooed face down, blowing against your sensitive earlobe. The sensation has your eyes rolling back as you moan loudly, not even trying to muffle the sounds. “K-Kuna!” His left gloved hand shoots up, covering your mouth as he takes your earlobe between his teeth, gently nibbling on it.

Your eyes are all back as you buck your hips upward, searching for something to grind yourself on as pleasure explodes within your abdomen. You’ve always had sensitive ears, but none of your partners in the past have ever played with them before. So for Sukuna to not only massage the sensitive flesh but also take it between his teeth and gently suck on it, you were shocked to be getting off on it.

Here you were, having your boyfriend suckle and nip at your ear as his hand kept clamped over your mouth. Your hands shot up, gripping his black tank top, holding onto the fabric as pleasure rocks through every nerve of your body. A familiar coil tightened in your stomach, and for a second, you panicked before you realized this man, the man that you were falling in love with, was about to make you cum from playing with your ears.

All it takes is a nibble on the sensitive skin, and your eyes are wide as you rock shamelessly into the air. Your orgasm hits you fast and hard, giving you heart palpitations as you grip Sukuna tighter, holding onto him for dear life as you cum in the tattoo shop he works at. Your boyfriend sucks and gently nibbles at your skin. His hand was still firmly against your mouth, silencing the moans and whines threatening to alert his coworkers about what you were up to.

Your boyfriend only removes his hand from your mouth as you gently release your grip on his tank top. Pulling his gloved hand back, he stares down, panting heavily like some rabid animal. The way your breast moves up and down as you gasp for air, basking in the afterglow of your orgasm, has him moving before you even think. You follow him with hazy eyes, watching as he rips the gloves off his hands, tossing them in the trash before he locks the door to his office.

“Take off your pants,” he grunts as he undoes the buckle to his belt. “I’m going to fuck you, and then I’m going to pierce both of your ears. And once they’re healed.” He sticks his tongue out, revealing his piercing that glimmers in the lights above. “ I’m gonna run my piercing up and down the sensitive studs that I’m going to put in your ears myself.”

Nanami Kento:

“Oooh, my god, my feet are killing me,” you mutter as you lie on the couch, and your husband sits down next to you, taking your feet gently and placing them in his lap. “Whoever invented high heels needs to be sent to hell.”

Nanami chuckles at his hands, gently moving to massage her clean feet. Both of you had just gotten out of showers and settled onto the couch for a quiet evening after nonstop meetings at the high school. Hair is brushed back, still damp, as his thumbs gently move up and down your feet, causing you to tell your head back and moan.

“Does that feel good?” he gently asked, increasing the pressure against the sole of your foot. You respond with another moan. I suppose I’ll take that as a yes.”

You lay your head back against the throw pillows, losing yourself in your husband’s gentle caresses as he works out the nuts and the sore tendons of your feet. It feels so sinfully good that it has you gently squirming against the couch. But when he gently runs his well-trimmed nails up, scratching the bottom of your foot, you moan. Not in satisfaction of the relief that his fingers bring, but one that is full of sexual desire.

Your hand stops just above the pad of your foot as his eyes slowly turn towards you. Both of you stare at one another in shock. That had never happened before. Nanami had given you plenty of massages in the past, so why was this one different?

“D-Did that hurt?” Kento asks. As he gently begins, he rubs your foot again.

“N-No, it just felt good.”

“Like this?” he continues to need your foot using his thumbs. But you don’t have the same reaction you did before. “Or this?” The second he’s dragging his nails from the tip of your toe down to your heel, pleasure erupts from you. “Oh, that was it.”

“O-Oh, my god!” He does it again and again and again. “K-Kento! Fuck!”

Honey brown eyes, watch as your toes curl with each scratch of his nail. “Huh~ I knew your neck was sensitiv., but this is something I’ve never seen before.” his scratches increase in speed, and his eyes are transfixed on your face, watching as you pant and moan, your back arching as you throw your head back. “If I didn’t know any better, I would assume that you’re about to have an orgasm.”

“Fuuuck~ fuck fuck~ Keeento!” You grab onto the sofa, back arching higher as your pussy begins to pulsate as intense pleasure reaches its peak. “Oh my god! Oooh, my fucking god!!” you scream out loud as you cum hard. You're shaking as you try, pulling your feet out of your husband’s lap only to have him pull them back, his nails scratching harder against the soles of your feet, extending your orgasm and making it all the more intense.

You don’t even have a chance to recover from your surprise orgasm when your husband is pulling you into his lap, making you straddle the hard bulge in his pajama pants. He grabs both sides of your hips and rocks you gently back and forth over his erection. His breath is hot against your mouth before he slams his lips against yours. His tongue doesn’t even ask for permission before sliding it into your mouth. It wraps around your tongue, and the lingering taste of white wine and chocolate dances over your taste buds, making your hips faster against Kento’s.

Your quiet evening wasn't as peaceful as you both had anticipated. But it was an evening that all massages were purely orgasmic.

Geto Suguru:

“Ya’ know, when you texted me at 10:20 at night asking me to come over, I didn’t think it was for this reason.” Suguru chuckles from behind you, twisting different strands of your hair in his hands. “But practicing braiding hair for the girls is kind of hot.”

“The girls have been begging me to do a different hairstyle. I could practice on myself, but it’s easier this way.” His words trail off, and you can’t help but smile at him in the mirror.

“Ah~ you just wanted to see me~!” Suguru’s tanned skin slightly flushed as he pouted. “Oooh baby, it’s okay~!”

“Alright l, alright, that’s enough out of you.” He grumbled, giving one of the sections a harsh tug.

You inhaled sharply, the sound choking out with a moan. Suguru winced, looking into the mirror before you to whisper a rushed apology until he saw the look on your face. Your cheeks were flushed, eyes half-lidded as your hand was over your mouth. Geto stared down at you, eyes wide, as your whole body trembled.

“Did you just moan?”

“N-Nuh-uh-haaaah!” You yelped out a louder moan as Suguru tugged your hair again, harder this time. “Nnngh, oooh god.”

“You did!” He released the three sections of hair before running his fingers through the strands of your hair, gently caressing the crown of your head. You thought you were in the clear, but just as you were about to breathe out in relief, your boyfriend grabbed a handful of your hair, tugging it sharply. That breath of relief turned into a moan so sensual, so pornographic, Suguru tugged again.

“H-Haaah Suguru p-please!” You mewled as you gripped the bathroom sink, “I-I—fuck!”

Your eyes were watching him in the mirror, a sinister smirk on his lips as his eyes trailed up and down your back. Watching how your muscles tensed up with every tug, how goosebumps rose against your skin. Suguru was getting off on the fact you were squirming just like you did when his cock was buried deep inside of you.

“Fuccck, you’re so goddamn fuckin hot!” His hand tugged a handful of hair harder and harder. “You look like you’re in such a euphoric state. Are you seriously getting off on this?”

“I-I—fuck! Fuck fuck fuck.” Your nails scratched over the marble counter as Suguru pulled you up by your hair, bent you over the counter, and his fingers massaged your scalp. “S-Sugu-Suguru~!” You cried out as he pulled your hair back, smirking at you in the mirror.

“Look at yourself, Princess~ look at how turned on you are over me just playing with your hair.” His hot breath blew against your ear. “This is good to know for when I fuck you from behind, yeah? Is your pussy clamping down each time I tug?”

“F-Fuck! Fuuuck!” you grip the edge of the sink harder, your body shaking as your toes curl. “Sugu~!”

“If you beg, I’ll give you what you want.”

“N-No, Sugu, wait pl—”

“Wait~? You don’t want me to fuck you.” A final sharp tug was the last straw. You moaned loudly, eyes shut tight as you creamed your panties. You whispered and whined as you convulsed against the counter. Suguru stood behind you, biting his lip as he watched you unravel from something minuscule.

It was only when your body stopped shaking that Suguru released his grip on your hair. He was beginning to pull down his sweats when you were around, grabbing a handful of his dark, luscious locks and giving it a sharp tug. Suguru let out a moan that was just as pornographic as yours had been as you pulled him down to your height, glaring into his eyes.

“I-If you don’t fuck me right now, I’m gonna tug your hair until you cum in your pants.”

As tempting as your threat was, Suguru would rather not cum in his sweats like a teenager. Instead, he grabbed your hips, whirling you back towards the mirror, and tugged your sweats down along with his own. “Yes, my Princess, as you wish.”

Toji Fushiguro:

You never thought domestic life would be for you in all your years. But when you met Toji, your views changed. Your boyfriend was a single father, and you were absolutely smitten by him. Toji was a bit brash and liked to gamble, but he was incredibly smart and spoiled you rotten. So you had no problem cooking dinner and helping around the house with his help. The longer you were with him, the more you loved it.

The three of you were a family.

Standing in the kitchen, cooking dinner for the three of you had become a nightly routine you adored. You were standing over the kitchen sink, washing the dishes you had soaked for a bit. You had time to kill, seeing that Megumi was finishing up a play date with his friend Yuuji. Yuuji’s dad would walk them home in about an hour and give them more than enough time to prepare dinner and clean the kitchen.

Just as you were finishing the dishes in the sink, large buff arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you firmly against a broad chest; the intoxicating smell of amber and driftwood wafted over Toji, buried his face and your neck. It was such a domestic gesture, and it had you weak in the knees.

“Fuck that food smells so good.” He grumbled, hugging you a bit tighter, stealing your breath away. “God, I’m so lucky to have you.” Toji groaned into your ear as he lightened his grip on you before squeezing you again.

The feeling of him robbing himself so tightly around you wasn’t at all painful. Instead, it was the exact opposite. You felt your body burning as he squeezed you tight before releasing you again. The smell of him, the feeling of his arms so muscular wrapped around you, and the slight oxygen deprivation always got you going. It was usually all of those factors individually. But to have them all happen simultaneously while he hugged you so tight, oh God, it got your blood boiling.

“You look so damn cute, too~” You whined in response, lifting a hand, your mouth covering it. “Say, if I bought you a cute little apron, would you wear it for me? Just the apron?” Another squeeze of his big arms had you moaning louder. “Oh, someone likes that idea, don’t they?”

When all you can do is whimper in response, Toji knows there’s more to your arousal than just the prospect of being his little housewife that has you squirming, how your breathing becomes more profound and shallow. It wasn’t just the idea of wearing an apron for him. It was because he had his arms wrapped around you; he pressed you back against his chest while he squeezed and released, constricting his arms around you.

“F-Fuck! Toji, oh God!” You rocked your hips back against his crotch, trying to release some of the building tension in your body. “Fuuuck~!”

Toji smirked, hugging you tighter. “What a kinky little girlfriend I have.” he ran his tongue over his top lip before hugging you even tighter as your body trembled. “Getting off from a hug~ good to know~!” Your boyfriend hugs you again. This time, you gripped the edge of the sink as you tried to warn him. But there was no way you were getting any words out from the pleasure that was rushing. “What ya’ gonna cum~? You’re shaking like you do right before you cum in my mouth.” You somehow managed to nod your head.

“G-Gonna~ gonna!”

“Go on then~ make a mess~”

With one final squeeze, your cummed with a shuttering gasp as your body shook and twitched against him. Your legs clamped tight together as Toji held you as tight as he could against him. His breathing was as ragged as yours as he took in your post-orgasmic appearance. Heavy breathing, flush cheeks, the way sweat beaded at your forehead from the intensity of the pleasure. Seeing you in such a state had him going feral.

“Fuck!” Toji picks you up, pressing you against the refrigerator, your skirt up, tugging your underwear. “We got about l thirty minutes before Meg’s gets home. In those next thirty minutes, I’m gonna make sure to hug you nice and tight, and in exchange, you make sure to hug my cock just tight with your pussy.” He growled into your ear; it was so raw and full of need that you took your bottom lip between your teeth and giggled. You might enjoy being his living girlfriend, but he was just as smitten with you as you were with him.

Forever Tag List:

@darkstarlight82 @pandoness @nealeart @simp-plague @sugurubabe @chilichopsticks

#jjk smut #jujutsu kasien #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk #jjk reader smut #jjk reader insert #jjk y/n #jjk gojo smut #jjk gojo #jjk men #jjk men smut #jjk men x reader #jjk geto x reader smut #jjk gojo x reader smut #jjk nanami x reader #jjk toji x reader smut #jjk choso smut #jjk choso x reader smut #jjk sukuna smut #jjk nanami smut #jjk geto smut #reader jjk #jjk imagines #jjk fanfic #jjk geto #jjk gojo x reader #satoru gojo smut #gojo satoru smut

[ihavethedreamies]

Don't Poke the Bear | Jongho

Choi Jongho - ATEEZ

Rating: M (18+) MDNI

Word Count: ~7k 🫢 (over 2k of it is smut btw)

Pairing: Bear-Hybrid!Jongho x Fox-Hybrid!AFAB!Reader

Genre: Hybrid AU!, Historical/Period, Reader-Insert, Fluff, Smut, Some Plot, Strangers-to-Friends-to-Lovers

!!This is smut…if that much isn't clear you should probably leave now!! MDNI!

Warnings: She/Her Pronouns used, Pet Names (Sweetheart, Sunshine, Precious, etc.), Swearing, Kissing, Hickeys/Marking, Heat/Rut, Pheromones, Oral (M! Receiving), Deepthroating/Face-Fucking, Big Dick! Jongho (of course), Size Differences, Size Kink, Praise Kink, Cockbulge, Over-Stimulation, Unprotected Sex (This is pre-birth control so…)

Trigger Warning: There is mentions of guns in this, but its just a revolver and the reader shoots it once at a target. That's it.

Disclaimer: I do have the whole cock-bulge thing in this. I understand this could be a bit offensive to some who are on the heavier side (I am in that group as well). Sorry if this doesn't align with your body type, this is just a work of fiction.

Author's Note: This is NOT Omegaverse, but there is a mention of Jongho being an 'alpha'. They have animals ears and tails. Jongho is bigger here than he is in real life, probably about 6'5"/196 cm, since he's a bear hybrid. This is set in about Wild West times, so around 1830s, but it's not a Western themed story.

I will be doing all the members and uploading them as I go. I normally like to upload a whole series at a time but I'm trying to pack to move.

🦁 Hongjoong's 🦁

🐕 Yeosang's 🐕

I am cross-posting this on Archive. Please reblog! If you know anyone that would like this or future fics but they aren't on here my name and icon are exactly the same on the other site. Happy reading!

When your stomach groaned, again, you groaned back.

"Shut up, I'm looking." you told it. You got no response. Sighing deeply, you stumbled a bit on a root, catching yourself with a hand on the tree trunk. You had no idea why, but for the last two days, you hadn't been able to find any prey. Sniffing in distaste, you held up an arrow, looking at the completely clean arrowhead. Letting your arm down, the arrow laid at your side. You glanced down at your other slack arm, bow held in that hand. What's the point of having a weapon if there is nothing to kill to eat with it? You wondered what full foxes did when they couldn't find anything to eat. Starve? No, the probably moved on to a different area. A bit harder to do that when you had settled in the area nearly four months prior and had no intention of leaving. Your semi-permanent shelter was finally finished, nice and cozy, and you loved the area you were in. Normally it was simple to get food, just step outside your hut and shoot a hare out in the field. When you were not able to see anything, you instead would go deeper into the woods that your home lay at the edge of. But there was even less there, if it was possible. You were getting closer to the river, but you weren't very good at fishing. Hitting a rabbit or squirrel with an arrow is actually much easier than a fish. Might have to try though, since you had run out of food completely the day prior. It was late fall, getting closer to winter, and so there wasn't really anything to forage for either. Everything had been eaten by deer or other animals. Since you were hungry, so hungry, your steps were uneven and clumsy.

"Fuck!" Your long tail caught on the thorns of some bush, knocking you down to your knees. Yanking the appendage to free it, you yiped, looking back at the branches to see a tuft of rusty orange fur left behind. Running your hands over your tail, the spot wasn't noticeable, but it stung. Scratching the back of your ear at the top of your head, you got back up, continuing toward the water. You could hear the river water rushing over some rocks, most likely a short waterfall. Before you could even see the river though, you saw a building to your left. Getting closer, it was a fairly large shelter, much bigger and nicer than yours. An actual cabin rather than a weird cross between a tent and a hut. It was most likely older and whoever had built it also most likely had known what they were doing. What really caught your eye though, was the fish strung up on a line between two wooden poles. Your mouth watered, one of the giant salmon would easily feed you for a week if you cured it properly and rationed it. You felt your tail wag a bit at the thought and you eagerly stalked forward. The thought of who had caught the fish, and who the dwelling belonged to didn't even cross your mind, way too hungry.

"Come to mama~" You giggled and right when your long claw-like nails got close to pulling the fish off the line, someone grabbed the back of your shirt. Yelping in shock, you felt your feet leave the ground, just an inch or two, your captor easily lifting you. Your legs scrambled helplessly in the air as you floundered, hands going to grapple at the one holding you. The person lifted you even higher in retaliation and so you wiggled and squirmed harder.

"Let me go!" you shouted and that seemed to work, but then you landed hard on your butt.

"Ow, fuck!" You scrambled to get up and to your feet, spinning to see who the heck had grabbed you. What human was stupid enough to mess with a fox hybrid- Bear. Bear hybrid, that's who. Not a human. Your ears pressed back and down against your skull, tail tucking between your legs, no longer snapping back and forth. The male raised an eyebrow and you got a good look at his face. He was gorgeous. All of him, really, not just his face. That, though, very handsome. He was covered from the neck down in dark brown hide, the arms and collar of his jacket lined with thick fur. You didn't know if his pants were so tight from their cut or if his thighs were just that thick, and you honestly hoped for the latter…Or did you? He was thick with muscle all over. He shifted his stance, hands resting on his belt, standing over you, staring. The dominance emanating from him struck through you, and you weren't sure if you should feel scared or aroused. You had met bear hybrids before, that's not what was doing it, it was something from him. It made you wonder…

"A-are you an alpha or something?" you boldly asked. There were some predator hybrids that seemed to be more in touch with their animal nature than others, and he sure seemed like one of them.

"I'm not a canine." He spoke down to you, literally, he was fucking massive. The top of your head barely reached his chin.

"I-I know…"

"Only canines have alphas."

"Then what are you?" He scoffed at your brazen question.

"Why should I answer, vixen, when you came here to steal my food?" He started to walk toward you, so you pounced to the side, turning to keep your face toward him. You watched his hands go to the hook holding the salmon, taking it down off the line. Your tail whipped once, nervously, and you hoped he couldn't hear your heart pounding. You weren't sure how you felt about him, how to feel about how much bigger he was than you, stronger. He smelled so fucking good too-

"I-I'm hungry, okay?! I haven't had any meat in two days!" You tried to defend yourself, your voice cracking pitifully.

"You say that like you don't normally steal." His sneer was evident in his tone and you scoffed hard.

"I don't!"

"You're a fox, right?"

"Not all foxes steal! You big…brute!" He didn't respond, just walked around the pole holding one end of the line, toward the front of his cabin.

"H-hey!" You knew you should have taken the chance to flee, that would have been smart, but instead you trailed after him. Those fish looked too good, and you noticed he was easily carrying the string of five over his shoulder. His big boots thumped across the hard, cold ground, your much lighter feet barely making a sound. When you caught up to him, coming around the cabin, he was laying the fish down on a wooden table it looked like he might have made himself.

"D-do you cook them?" Your mouth watered. You preferred your meat cooked, that was probably the human part of you, but the fox part of you could eat raw if necessary.

"I-if…If I do something for you in return, can I have a fish?" you asked, stepping forward carefully, tail snapping behind you. You were pointing at the one you had been reaching for, which was the smallest one.

"What could you do for me, vixen?" He was standing back up again, hands on his belt. Why did he have to just stand like that? There was no need. Did he just stand like that normally? His question registered then, and your brain kicked into gear trying to think of an answer. You had offered help, but that didn't mean you knew what kind of help. That was his part of the exchange.

"What do you want me to do…he-bear?" For the life of you, you couldn't think then of what a male bear was called. He huffed at your attempt to match his confidence. Your eyes flitted to his chest, shirt struggling and stretching over his chest just from him breathing.

"Jongho."

"What?"

"My name. Please don’t ever call me 'he-bear' again."

"Oh…Jongho. Uh, I'm (Y/N)."

"Can you climb?"

"Climb?"

"Can you climb a tree?"

"Oh, yes." Your eyes followed his thumb when he jabbed it toward his left. You glanced around him toward where he was pointing, an apple tree. It was huge, you wondered how long it had been there.

"Go get as many as you can." He picked up a basket from under the table, easily chucking it toward you. You managed to catch it, maybe fumbled with it a bit, and headed over to the tree. Maybe you could grab a couple of them…

"Where did you get an apple tree?" You called behind you as you approached it, "aren't they normally in human areas?"

"I sell to humans."

"Sell? Sell what?" You wrapped your tail through the handle of the basket, curling it up to hold it up as you climbed up the tree. He was probably tall enough to get at the apples himself, but it would be easier to get them climbing.

"Furs. Wood and metal work." You sat on a branch, putting a narrow branch through the handle of the basket to hold it for you as you plucked a red fruit off a twig. It smelled so good, but he would notice if you took a bite. Dropping it into the basket, you continued, noticing which ones weren't quite ripe yet.

"Metal work?" You peered through the branches of the apple tree, noticing a side building right next to his cabin, a blacksmithing forge inside.

"Wait, you've worked with full humans?"

"Yes."

"Have you seen those little guns they carry? That don't need powder and a ball?" You had picked about ten apples by then, balancing on the branch to try and reach an eleventh. He didn't respond, so you glanced past the leaves to where he was at the table, and he went to a pouch on his belt. He opened it, pulling out a revolver.

"Woah!" You beamed in awe, not paying attention to where you where crawling on the branch. You yelped as it bowed under your weight, making you lose your balance. You closed your eyes, ready to fall. It wasn't too far, you wouldn't die, but it sure would hurt.

"Oof!" You did land on something hard, just not the ground. The wind got knocked out of you as you fell face down onto Jongho, middle on his shoulder. While you caught your breath, coughing a few times, he unlatched the basket and carried both you and it back over to the table. The basket was set on the end of the table and he then let you down to sit on the other end. Even up on the surface, you had to tilt your head to look him in the eye. You rubbed your sore middle, though it was much less painful that it would have been to bellyflop onto the ground. The bear noticed your eyes flit to the little gun still on the table, and he sighed. Grabbing it, he popped the rotating barrel out, shaking the little bullets out, then handed you the unloaded gun. Taking it carefully with both hands, you were surprised at its weight. It was heavy for its size, but much lighter than a musket. He continued to work on the fish, cleaning them or something, eyeing you as you curiously looked at the revolver.

"Man, this would be so much easier to hunt with."

"It's different than aiming a bow." He scoffed, swiping the weapon back from you, reloading it.

"Show me?"

"You're awful demanding." Jongho scolded, holstering the gun back to his belt. You sniffed in disappointment, swinging your legs a bit from where you sat up on the table, watching him work.

"If I feed you, will you leave me be?" he asked after a few minutes of silence.

"No." You liked to be honest. He sighed, putting his thin knife down.

"I'll leave you be if you show me how to shoot it."

"Why does it matter if you don't have one yourself?" You shrugged in response. He couldn't decide if you were annoying or endearing. He stood up straight, stepping closer to you, so he was standing right before you. Your ears dropped a bit, tail lying flat from where it had been thumping on the wood softly. He was so freaking big. You felt a familiar twinge in your tummy, and your thighs clenched. His eyebrow raised, nostrils flaring slightly and your eyes widened in panic. Could he smell your arousal? So easily? The bear sighed deeply then, "Come here." He took the gun back out and you hopped off the table to follow him as he headed around a big tree. When you came around as well, you saw that there was a circle carved into another tree a bit in distance.

"Hold it up, arm straight out, level it. Then, line this little piece up with where you want to shoot." His thumb flicked at the sight piece.

"Pull the hammer back with your thumb, then press the trigger with your index finger. You'll have to press harder than you think." He snapped the barrel back out, rotated it to check the rounds, then snapped it back shut, handing it to you. You followed his instructions, keenly aware of him at your back. You stood much the same way you did for archery, but he corrected you. He brought his hand to your bicep, bringing it up so you gripped the gun with both hands instead. To compensate, you turned your body a bit more toward the target. You clicked the hammer back, that took more strength than you thought too, and wrapped your finger around the trigger. Breathing in, steadying your aim, you lined the sight up. As you breathed out, you pressed hard like he coached and the gun went off. It was so much louder than you expected, your ears flattening to your skull, body recoiling along with the weapon. You stumbled back into his solid chest, ears ringing painfully. You narrowed your vision toward the target. You didn't get a bullseye, but you did at least hit inside the target circle. That feat pulled your body out of shock from the loud bang and you beamed, cheering.

"I did it!" You jumped in excitement and he quickly took the still smoking gun from you. He holstered it once more and couldn't help but let out a small huff of laughter as you cheered for yourself. Endearing, he decided, cute even.

~*~*~

"D-do I rotate it?" You looked over at him, sitting on a log bench by the fire pit. He had cleaned, filleted and skewered the salmon, letting the pieces roast by the fire. Jongho had set them in the dirt, skin facing the flames more, tilted toward the heat.

"It's fine." He had brought the basket of apples over and you watched him roll one in his hand. His eyes flicked to your face, wanting to see your reaction, as he gripped the fruit with both hands, splitting it perfectly in half with ease.

"Woah!" Your face lit up and he couldn't hold back a smug grin. Holding the two halves easily in one hand, he held it out for you, and you sprung to your feet from your own log bench. Skipping over, you took the two halves from him, the scent making your mouth water. Sinking your teeth into the flesh, you groaned in delight. You hadn't had the pleasure of eating an apple before. Crab apples, yes…but those are absolutely horrible. The bear could tell you were honest about being so hungry with how fast you devoured the fruit. When you were left with the two pieces of the core, you hiccupped. Your face grew more and more displeased with each hiccup, growing annoyed with the process.

"Geez." You breathed hard, trying to control your throat, but you hiccupped again, a slight pain blossoming in your chest.

"Fucking hell." You swore softly, then let out another hiccup.

"Geez!" You groaned, then your tummy rumbled, and a gas bubble erupted. You kept your mouth closed to muffle the noise, minding your manners, and the seizes stopped.

"Thank goodness." You sighed and Jongho couldn't help but chuckle. So cute. He was a little upset with how cute you were growing to him.

"What?" You whined a bit, feeling self-conscious.

"You're cute, vixen." Your tail snapped in embarrassment.

"I have a name." You corrected coyly, not able to look at him, face warming. You almost added on 'he-bear', but he had said please…

"(Y/N), you're cute." He fixed his compliment and you sniffed, secretly pleased.

"And?"

"And what?" You weren't sure what you were expecting, honestly.

"Uh…"

"Whatever, sweetheart." The little pet-name wasn't condescending or patronizing, and your entire body froze.

"D-don't." you whispered and he rose a brow in question, looking up from a second apple.

"Don't?"

"D-don't call me that…"

"Why not?" The bear smirked; you could see it from your peripheral. Your cheeks were quite red by that point. You didn't answer, focusing on watching your fish cook. He let it go, chuckling softly to himself.

~*~*~

"It's hot-" He warned, but it was too late. The hot fish stung your tongue, but you were much too hungry to care. Waving the skewer it was on, like that would cool it off, you blew hard on it a few times, then took another bite. You devoured the fish, much like the apple, he was surprised you ate the whole filet.

"T-Thank you." You wiped at your mouth with your forearm, handing the skewer back to him. He took the whittled bone from you and it seemed you were getting ready to leave, picking up your bow and quiver.

"You live nearby?"

"Oh, yeah, just a few meters that way." You waved in the general direction. The sun was setting by then, the cold setting in.

"In that half-tent?"

"It’s a hut!" You tried to defend your shelter since you built it yourself. He stood then, and you wondered what he was doing, coming toward you.

"There's a storm coming, I'll help you get your things, you can stay here tonight."

"A storm? Like snow? Already? Wait, what!?" He walked past you toward your home and you gaped after him like the fish you just ate. Shaking your head to gather your senses back, you trotted after him. You were a bit out of breath by the time you got to your dwelling, you couldn't even see the fire from his place.

"B-but this is where I live, I'll be okay!" You seemed to be trying to convince yourself of that as well.

"Get your stuff." He jerked his head toward your hut and you huffed but did so. If there really was a snowstorm coming, you would prefer the much sturdier and less drafty cabin he had. You were able to gather everything except the structure itself with his help and he went slower for you on the way back. You wondered how the heck you had never noticed his cabin before, but you also never went that far into the woods, let alone so close to the river. As you passed the cursed bush that tore a chunk of your fur out, you sneered down at it, wrapping your tail around your leg to keep it safe. You heard him huff out a laugh, and you glared at his rounded black ears, one of them flicking slightly. At first you were a bit ruffled by his suggestion, but you were growing grateful as some snowflakes started to fall. Plus, ultimately, he was being kind. You thought he was going to set you up in his smithing lean-to, or maybe even just under the shelter of the room over his porch. But he had opened the door to his cabin, bringing your stuff with him. The bear looked over his shoulder at you, waiting for you to follow. Once inside, you looked around. To your left was a table with a water jug and basin and to the right a large cedar chest. There was a sitting area with an actual couch and a fireplace. Right across from the door on the other end of the one-room cabin was the bed, big and with a mattress. It must really pay to trade with humans… You watched him set your belongings against the wall near the bed and you noticed a little side room.

"You have an attached outhouse?!" You gaped at the luxury and he hummed. Not really an outhouse if it was attached… You set your stuff you had carried next to his load and looked more around his home. The couch looked comfy, but you had little perspective, never having the luxury of sitting on one. It did beat sleeping on a bedroll, you assumed, and you were a bit worried that you wouldn't want to go back.

"I take up a lot of the bed, but you're tiny." His comment threw you out of your thoughts, nearly giving yourself whiplash with how hard you turned to look at him.

"W-what?"

"It's going to get really cold, even with the fire on. It'll be warmer." He stated and you realized he was right. Still, your insides flopped at the thought. It was hard enough being around him, and how good he smelled, let alone in a room that smelled mostly of him. Could you really handle sleeping next to him…just sleeping? You swallowed, you weren't due for a heat for a while, but he was extremely attractive. The fact that he was a bear should have lessened your desire, but no. The unfamiliar, the new experience, the size difference…

"What are you thinking about, sunshine?" Jongho had walked past you to shut the door, pulling out a small box. Matches. You had never seen them at work before, so you stepped closer, watching him scratch the little red end of the wood piece on the side of the box, flame erupting out of thin air. He lit the oil lamps he had, casting a soft warm glow around the room, seemingly right as the sun set beyond the horizon. You didn't make a comment on the little pet-name, though it wasn't much easier to process than 'sweetheart'.

"C-can't you just use my name?" You sniffed, moving around him to sit on the couch. The leather-covered cushion sunk under your butt and you let out a silent 'wow' at the plush feeling. The bear chuckled, moving around to join you on the couch. You scooted over to allow him room, he took up much more space than you. He rested back, arm slung to the side over the back, right behind you. His feet were firmly planted on the floor, knees wide, and he sat on the couch like he was a king on his throne. The confident dominance wafted over you again and your core pulsed. Biting your lip, you looked away from him quick, and Jongho smirked at your sudden rigid posture. He watched the tip of your tail as the end thumped lightly on the cushion. You squeaked when he carefully ran his fingers over the orange fur, right where you had a tuft ripped out.

"What happened?"

"You can notice it?" You whined, looking at the spot, trying to ignore that he was still touching your tail. His eyes flitted to your ear as it flicked in annoyance.

"It got snagged on some thorns earlier."

"Did it hurt?"

"Stung a bit…" You flinched when a sudden gust of wind rattled the door and shutters on the window. Your ears flicked when a distant rumbling travelled through the air.

"Thunder?" You could have sworn that's what you heard, but that would be weird. When it happened again though, it was confirmed.

"It can thunder in a snowstorm?" You wondered aloud and the bear hummed, fingers once again stroking over the fur of your tail. Goosebumps rose on your skin, the fur raising a bit along with it.

"I'm gonna use the outhouse!" You stood up quickly, pulling your tail out from under his hand and curling it toward yourself. As you did so, you could smell your own arousal, and hoped that since your pants would be back up, he wouldn't be able to as well. Going back into the house, you sighed at the warmth, he already had a fire going. It was rapidly getting cold and you could hear the wind whipping along with a low distant rumble. Despite the fire, you knew he was right about it getting pretty cold. Gently sitting on the edge of the mattress, you tried to ignore how soft it was, and took off your boots. Slipping off your vest, you climbed up further on the bed, bouncing a bit in delight.

"Move over, sunshine." He motioned for you to follow, since you were in the middle of the bed. You bounced on your butt to do so, too enamored with the mattress to really focus on him.

"Ah!" You squeaked when he wrapped his arm around you, lifting you with ease so he could pull the blankets out from under you and back. Your face was rapidly heating along with your lower stomach and you finally looked over him as he got in the bed. He had taken off his bear hide coat, leaving him in just a light brown henley shirt. The ends of the sleeves had been rolled up to rest right below his elbows and you marveled at the evident muscle there.

"Sleep, (Y/N)." Jongho had laid back, adjusting his head on the pillow and you slowly followed suit. You nearly moaned in delight at the feeling of the mattress cradling you, the pillow under your head just as soft. Yep, you never wanted to sleep on a bedroll again. You were startled out of your thoughts when he pulled the blankets up and over you, rolling onto his side so he could face you. He propped himself up on his palm, elbow to the bed, delicately resting the end of the blanket up near your chin. Your face burned hot, and you nestled into the bedding to hide.

"Th-thank you for letting me stay here for the storm…" You mumbled and he hummed, finally resting down himself, still facing you. When he pulled the blanket up and over himself, you felt the heat rapidly rise under the covers. You had never felt so warm and cozy in your life, and you suddenly felt your weariness. Blinking, trying to stay awake, you looked over his face, vision hazy from sleepiness. He was…

"So handsome." You muttered, barely registering you said it aloud, and he had heard it. The bear smirked at the compliment.

"Get some sleep, pretty girl." His clawed finger came up and brushed a strand of hair off your face and you couldn't help but follow his instruction.

~*~*~

Probably only an hour or two later, you were forced awake by a flash of light, a booming rumble, then the sound of wood snapping. You had rolled over onto your stomach, so you propped yourself up on your elbows underneath you. The blanket hung over your head, but you could see through the shutters of the window to the side of the bed. You had heard of a thundersnow before but had never experienced one. You shivered at the cool air hitting your face, it was so nice and warm under the blankets. Burrowing back under, you rolled to your side, facing the bear. You had nearly forgotten he was right there and you found your face right against his chest. It rose and fell as he slept, and you were a bit surprised he didn't snore, like…you know, like a bear.

Swallowing hard to steel your nerves for your next move, you slowly reached out, pressing your fingertips against the hard muscle of his chest. You shivered, wanting to feel over him more, see him…

"Haven't you heard not to poke a sleeping bear, sunshine?" His voice rumbling startled you. It was deep and rough from sleep and you rolled your eyes back a bit at how it made you feel, and his comment.

"Yeah, and?" You did it again, pressing just one finger against his chest that time, literally poking him. Poke. Poke. Poke.

"Huh?" You felt the bed shift, and he rolled, propping himself up over you on his forearm, pinning you to the mattress. Your hands were clenched into fists at your chest, holding them close to you for security. His face was so close, and you could feel the breath leaving his nostrils. As he loomed over you, he shifted his knee up, his thick leg wedging between yours. You shivered, letting out a small whine when his thigh pressed against your mound. Jongho smirked, leaning down so his mouth was right by your ear.

"Your decision. See what poking a bear does." You loosened one fist, index finger sticking out, shaking. Poke. His large hands suddenly seized your hips, claws slightly digging into the flesh of your ass through your pants. With his grip, he pressed your core against his thigh, forcing you to grind over him. You sighed at the feeling; a bit of a whine laced through the exhale. He shifted his knee further forward and hauled you up so he could wedge it under your lower back. Jongho led you to wrap your legs around his middle, still pressing you down to grind your covered cunt on his upper thigh. That pulled a moan from you and you gasped hard when he started laying open-mouthed kisses over your neck and shoulder. A low rumble hit your ears and at first you thought it was more distant thunder, but then you could feel it as you pressed your hands to his chest. Your fingers dug into the fabric of his shirt and you moaned as his kisses turned to sucking, and he barely dug his sharp teeth into your shoulder. Without his, or your prompting, your hips jumped, and he pressed into your movement. The bear's cock was growing hard, and your eyes fluttered closed when you felt it. Could he even fit?

"Are you sure about this, sunshine?" He pulled away, smirking as he admired the growing bruises he created over your shoulders and neck.

"Yeah, why?" Your eyes met his as a bolt of lightning lit the room, then thunder rumbled, snow blowing harsh against the window.

"Think your little body can handle me?" Jongho tilted his head, that smirk still there and you purposely moved your hips, whining.

"Yes!"

"You sure?"

"Would you just fuck me already?" You nearly shouted. He didn't answer, but your next plea was silenced as he swallowed it, tongue easily wiggling its way into your mouth. Your eyes rolled back as his hands dug into the flesh of your hips, avoiding using his claws too much. When your head started to swim, he pulled back from the kiss, smirking at the end of your tongue sticking out a bit from your mouth. One hand went to your jaw, thumb slipping into your mouth, and you eagerly sucked on it, tongue avoiding the sharp part of his claw.

"Want something else, sunshine?" Jongho grinned deviously as you nodded, whimpering. He got off of you then and you immediately missed not just the weight of him over you, but the heat his body was releasing. You just started in awe as he finally pulled the shirt off, and his muscle was clearly from strength, brute strength, not to look good. Though…he did.

"Hurry up, sunshine." His hand gripped over the bulge in his pants, and you rapidly sat up, your own hands going to the waist band. He watched calmly as you struggled to get the button undone and you bit your lip as you got his pants open. His hard cock nearly sprung out and you felt your mouth water at the sight, jaw already sore. Your long fluffy tail waved behind you, ears drooping as your small hand tried to wrap around his girth. Couldn't even get your fingers to touch and your cunt spasmed, telling you it was good and ready for him. Licking your lips to try and prevent the drool from dripping too bad, you stuck just the head in your mouth, tongue eagerly swirling. The salty drop of precum you tasted just fueled the fire and your eyes lazily flitted up to meet his. The look he gave you nearly made you whine; you didn’t know what bears called alphas, but he sure was one. Jongho's eyebrow crooked up, waiting boredly, and swallowed a few times, then eased him further in. It was a bit hard to keep your teeth behind your lips with how big his cock was, but he fit. The slight pressure from the sides of your long canines just added to the pleasure of your hot and wet mouth, drool already spilling from your lips. His eyes watched your tail wave back and forth, chest starting to rumble again as you took more of his cock. The head hit your throat, he was only about halfway in and you swallowed again, tongue eagerly slicking the underside of his dick. Your eyes met again and he barely seemed phased, so you sucked hard, your other hand joining the first to cover more of him. Bobbing your head, you hollowed your cheeks, whimpering at the taste of him. His large hand landed on your head, thump stroking the soft skin on the inside of your ear and you shifted your posture. Sitting back on your knees more, you widened your legs to lower you some, and let go with your hands.

"You sure, sunshine?" Jongho's smirk had come back and a full growl rumbled through the room when you nodded. Sucking air in harshly through your nose, swallowing to try and prevent your gags, he took charge, easing his cock in himself. When the fat head hit the back, he continued in, groaning as your eyes fluttered back. Your breathing was loud and fast, trying to take in enough air so when he finally filled your throat, you could hold your breath a bit. The spasms of your throat with your gags made him chuckle and he started to pump his hips, fucking his cock into your mouth. The slick sounds of your spit and lolling tongue were almost drowned out by the storm, but he could clearly hear your whines. He could feel them vibrating over his dick as well and he paid attention to your breathing and paced his thrusts.

"You thirsty, sunshine?" The bear laughed when your next whine was louder and he grunted, waiting for your breath. Once you had inhaled hard, he plunged in so your nose was pressed to his groin, hot thick spurts of cum going straight down your throat. Your cunt spasmed, slick dripping nearly through your pants, clit throbbing as you rode your high against the thick seam. Your vision started to blur, brain fogging, still swallowing over and over to get all he gave down, and he finally withdrew so you could suck in air. Your throat was raw, sore, but you would let him do it all over again and thank him for it too. Now that his high had faded, though his dick was still rock hard, he could smell the thick aroma of your arousal. You smelled like spring grass and fresh water, laced with the sweet scent of marigolds.

"Lay back, sunshine." He prompted and you flopped back onto your back, body shivering, though it wasn't clear from what. There was a dark stain on the crotch of your pants, he noticed as he took his off. You were hauled to sit up as he tugged at your shirt, tearing a few runs into it as he pulled it off of you and you squeaked as he wrestled your leather leggings off. They flopped onto the floor behind him and your scent had grown further, making his pupils narrow, brow furrowing. You eagerly wrapped your arms around his broad shoulders when he crawled over you, nose running up your throat. Jongho nearly roared as he growled, grasping your thighs, pulling back so he could manhandle you. Your knee ended up at your ear, the other looped over his elbow and your eyes could only focus on his fat cock head pressing against your folds.

"Fuck!" You threw back your head, back arching when he pressed in, not rough but not slow either. With all your strength, you lifted your head to watch your cunt flutter to accommodate the stretch, core burning. He realized then maybe he should have prepped you a bit, your pussy was so tight, that if you weren't so wet, he wouldn't be able to fill you so easily. You both, at the same moment, noticed that there was already a bulge forming from your stomach, his thick cock not even in all the way. You should have known the minute he kissed you before that you were ruined, but now it was for sure. You knew you would be sore in the morning too, but you would prefer being sore the rest of your life as his bed partner than to never fuck him again. His deep chuckle morphed into a grunt as he bottomed out, slick spilling from your stretching hole and onto the bed below. If he had known that you were only about a mile from his home, your cute little face and cute little pussy, he would have gone and found you himself.

"Jongho~" You nearly howled, hands reaching for him, out of his reach from sitting up straight. Adjusting your legs, while letting your core adjust to him, he pressed down close so your hands could find purchase on his back. Your ankles were at his ears, hot breath panting against his lips.

"You like my cock, precious?" The new pet-name was even worse than the others, and he could tell by how your gummy walls pulsed harder around him. His plush lips brushed over yours, then he felt you gasp into his mouth with the kiss, his groin pressing against your swollen clit. He watched your eyes glaze over, body falling limp as he pulled his hips back, giving a shallow and weak thrust, gaging if your body was ready.

"Too much?" The bear cooed when you shook your head no.

"More?" He prompted and that time, you shook your head yes. You should have guessed how powerful he could be, but you still weren't expecting the bed frame to crack against the wall with the first thrust. Your body screamed, but no sound left you as Jongho moved to press your knees to your ears, each deep, hard thrust forcing a tiny orgasm out of you. Your cunt burned from the stretch and stimulation, and your brain was fried. Good thing you were out in the woods with a storm raging, because you were squeaking and squealing, grunts and groans leaving him as well. Jongho rolled forward a bit more, hips barreling his cock down into your folded body, his thick claws leaving deep gouges into the wood as he gripped the headboard.

"Want my cum, precious? Huh, want my fat cock to fuck you stupid? Hm?" His tone was incredibly patronizing and it went straight to your cunt. You had left a puddle on the bedding beneath your hips and a mix of your drool and tears had left one on his pillow too. The cold from the snowstorm seemed to have been completely negated by the heat you felt, from him and because of him.

"Fill me, please! Jongho~" He wasn't sure why that time was different, the way you moaned his name, but it went to his head and his cock, orgasm hitting. Hot waves of cum filled you, the head of his dick pressed right against your cervix, so much slick and release squirting out from where you were connected. His hips continued to roll a bit, and you wondered how he was still so hard after pumping so much cum into you, and your poor pussy was stinging from the countless numbed of times he made you cum. You barely knew your name or where you were, let alone what you had let slip before.

"Like my big cock, precious?" The bear smirked when your droopy eyes flew open, ears flicking, tail started to thumb against the bed.

"You did good for me, sunshine." He was getting into it then, loving your reaction, face reddening further, cunt clenching around him more. It was like you were a dog, tail wagging for being a good girl. You yiped when he pulled out from you, the rapid loss took the air out of your lungs. He rolled you over and you couldn't hold yourself up at all, so only his hands on your hips kept them raised. You keened when the head of his messy cock met your equally messy folds once more and he didn't ease in that time. He somehow got even deeper, hips slapping against your ass so hard that you were sure the skin would be red and stinging soon. Your own claws gouged into the wood of the headboard, not able to do anything but take what he gave you, sweat coating both your bodies.

"Don't worry precious, I won't break you." The bear laughed, grinding his cock deep, as you came once more, the sting was fading into pain and you feared he could go much longer.

"Just. A. Bit. More." He grunted, chest rumbling and fell over the edge again, the heat inside you reignited as more hot white painted your core.

"Going to stay here with me? Be my cute little vixen?" His sudden question barely registered in your head, exhaustion taking over.

"Okay~"

🦁 Hongjoong's 🦁

🐕 Yeosang's 🐕

Master-Master List

ATEEZ Master List

#ihavethedreamies #kpop #kpop fluff #kpop smut #kpop x reader #kpop fanfic #x reader #ateez x reader #ateez fanfic #ateez #ateez fluff #ateez smut #ateez jongho #jongho fluff #jongho smut #jongho x reader #jongho fanfic #choi jongho

[bigfatbimbo]

It's been 84 years whoops I live. Someone said something at you about Vox railing them and listen, listen my beloved that is not an indication of dominance for him past the first minute of fucking. He thinks he's hot shit and demands to stay on top this time like he's got something to prove (he does) but within minutes his thrusts are so sloppy and uneven because he can't keep himself under control. He's collapsed forward and clinging to you like a lifeline while his hips just keep jolting forward without his say so. All his bravado from the start has devolved into humiliated whining that it feels so good, too good, begging you to please please please keep taking him he can't stop please mommy he needs to cum in you so bad. Any attempts he makes to collect himself just lead to him whining even louder when he can't. Anyway thats my essay on subtop vox technically doing the railing while also falling apart and begging the entire time thank u for ur consideration.

-MG

18+ minors dni

MG!!! Great to have you back brother, always leaving good shit in my inbox, dear lord. I don’t think I talk about subtop Vox on this blog enough because like it’s just so… Vox.

If you’re a naturally dominate partner then he would absolutely insist on topping or domming at least, like, five+ times. And most of that time, they would have the same result. Because Vox talks a big game, but in action it’s almost embarrassing how fast he unravels.

He would be so cocky at first, talking to you in that condescending manner, “Aw, is poor y/n upset they’re not in control for once—“ que sinister snickering “—Oh doll, you’re just gonna have to get used to it.”

You know what, he’s actually doing okay the first few thrusts, that is, until he’s not. And you two are only a few minutes in too, what a shame. It’s true, maybe you weren’t humoring him as much as he’d like you to be, but his frustration is almost an afterthought when compared to how tight you feel around him, how mind numbing the pleasure was.

But that can’t be right, Vox needed to do this right. If there’s one thing he was, he was competent, right? But you don’t even have to make a comment on the situation, although you’ve absolutely noticed, for him to start having to bite back whines.

“Fuck—zzh,” He’d curse before he sinks down, only propping himself up by an elbow as his body shudders above yours.

“Do you need any help, baby?” Your comment is sweet, too sweet. He can’t tell if it was meant to condescend him or not and, frankly, given the way your allowing him to hump into you like dog, he finds himself not caring as much as he should.

Instead he just grunts, before letting out a short staticky whine, and rutting into you more before stopping short, body shivering, muttering curse words under his breath.

At that point, it would only take a “It’s okay, sweetheart. You tried!” For him to fully collapse onto you. His bravado has been completely diminished, and the worst part is even Vox knows that there was virtually no way of winning back dominance. Not after that embarrassing display.

“Bit off more than you could chew?” Well, that was clearly condescending on your part this time.

“No that’s not—zzh, I— fuck—“ He whines, clinging onto your sides as his hips jolt into you, chasing the pleasure in his dick subconsciously, “I can’t stop, fuck, mommy please— ah shzzz, cant stop!”

Even with his full body weight on you, he doesn’t slow down or soften up, instead fully using you as a lifeline while he fucks into you with growing humiliation. His battle has officially been lost, as it is most times with you. There’s no point when you can see through his facade, so he gives in with his tail between his legs.

He’d practically beg you to let him come inside you, because hasn’t he tried so hard? “Mommy, please, please, I need it inside— Can’t—“ He has trouble articulating these words between static and buffering. When you finally tell him he’s allowed, you resist praising him too much, aka: calling him a good boy because, I mean, he did fail at the one thing he promised he would do.

But you still park him on the shoulder and reassure him it was okay because, after all, he looks cuter when he’s all fucked out, anyways.

#hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x you #hazbin hotel smut #vox x reader #dom reader #hazbin vox x reader #vox x reader smut #vox x you

[goldenamaranthe-blog]

omega charlie and alpha vaggie anon here. thanks for the blurb would love to see more of omegaverse chaggie! them getting their mate marks would be nice

Hi, ABOnymous!

Hahaha! See what I did there? This isn't where I typically do my more adult blurbs, but I think I got an idea for a way to make mating marks! (Psst! I'm also excited to do more Alpha Vaggie and Omega Charlie).

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*

Marked By Love: Chaggie

Charlie: (pacing nervously back and forth in her bedroom) Okay, okay, okay, just bring it up. That's all you have to do. Bring it up and see what she thinks. You've only been together for.... what.... three years now?

Charlie: (groans and stomps her feet in little tippy taps) Other Alphas usually mark their mates by the time they sync their ruts with their Omega's heats! We've been doing that for two years!!!

Charlie: (whining) I mean. I understand why now. She's an ex-exorcist. I get why she wouldn't want to exchange mate marks before. She didn't want me to find out and feel trapped, but STILL!!!!

Charlie: (gasps) What if she doesn't actually want to mate me....

Charlie: (gasps louder and holds her hands to her chest) Oh, that's a horrible thing to think. Do I think that?

Charlie: Y... Yes!

Charlie: N... No....

Charlie: UGH!!!! (flops back onto her bed and whines, covering her face with her hands) I just want to be her mate! Is that so much to ask? For her to just leave a big, bloody, mating mark on my-

Vaggie: Ahem!

Charlie: (springs up and sees Vaggie standing in the doorway with a smirk) Vaggie! Oh, shit! How long have you been standing there?

Vaggie: Hmm... I think the floor still had about an inch of wood still in that rut you made, so most of it.

Charlie: (curls into herself and laughs awkwardly) Y-Yeah... Right... So, elephant in the room?

Vaggie: (closes the door behind her and saunters up to Charlie, gently pushing her shoulder so she's laying on her back, before crawling over her Omega) I love you, Charlie. And, you were right. I was worried about marking you before because of my past.

Charlie: (blushing hotly and swallows) U-Uh-Huh....

Vaggie: (shifts her weight to her left hand so she can take Charlie's left hand and bring it to her lips, planting a soft kiss to the knuckle of the ring finger) But you still accepted me despite everything, so if you'll still have me, I'd love to leave a little pre-requisite mark before the main event tonight~

Charlie: (whines and shivers at the low rumble in Vaggie's chest) O-O-Okay~ (shakes her head) I mean, YES!!! YES, PLEASE!!! Please, Alpha!

Vaggie: (smirks and adjusts Charlie's fingers so her ring finger is sticking out. She licks the digit and takes it fully into her mouth before biting down on the third knuckle hard with a low growl. The metal and brimstone flavor of Charlie's blood tickles her senses and she soothes the mark with her tongue)

Charlie: (whimpers and blushes as she winces from the initial sting, but immediately wants more)

Vaggie: (kisses the new mark marring alabaster skin before smirking into Charlie's knuckles) Down, princesa. Just be patient until tonight. Until then, this will have to do~ (puts Charlie's hand down and leans up to kiss her forehead before getting off the bed) Now, if you'll excuse me. I have a meeting with our lovely neighborhood Radio Demon about hotel security. I'll see you at dinner.

Charlie: (springs up into a sitting position and watches Vaggie leave the room before looking down at the small mating mark on her finger. A bubble of euphoria swells in her chest and she plasters her face into her pillow, kicking her feet like a lovestruck teenager) FUCK YES!!!!!

#marked by love #chaggie #a/b/o #alpha and omega #alpha vaggie #omega charlie #mating marks #pg - 13 #omegaverse #thanks ABOnymous! #Golden answers #marked by love au

[eden4eva]

Come on bunny

Summary: Nick is a former barracks bunny, helping military men blow off some steam. This one man who won’t even acknowledge Nick storms into the barracks searching for him.

Warnings: smut!!, Mask during sex, cursing, degrading, slight choking, unprotected, coming inside, implied after care, little praise, slight spanking, hands tied up.

“OH FUCK!~” Nick screamed in pleasure as the man pounded into him, hitting his prostate and slapping his ass.

His eyes roll back into his head as his face is pressed into the pillows,

Nick looks like a drooling fucked out slut, getting back shots with his hands behind his back, yet he couldn’t be happier.

~Earlier~

The masked man stormed off the training field in anger. He couldn’t keep his gun straight causing him to miss most of his targets. He’s been pent up for a while, so he’s been stressed. His mind more focused on sex than his actual job.

The man swung open the door to the barracks, stomping through the hall he swung open nicks door. Nick was sleeping, the top off his head peaking out from under the blankets as he hugged one of his pillows.

The man’s face softened, he shut nicks door not caring about how loud he was being, the covers were yanked off his body startling Nick awake.

“Wha..” Nick mumbled rubbing his eyes trying to wake up.

It wasn’t often that he was woken up for sex but he wasn’t complaining when it did happen, when Nick first applied to be a barracks bunny he signed a form agreeing that it is ok to have sex whenever, of course if he wasn’t in the mood he could always say his safe word or color.

Nick yelped out when he was pulled to the edge of the bed by his ankles, he was flipped over on his stomach, the man gripped his hair and pulled his hair back roughly erupting a gasp from Nick.

Masked man pov

I yanked his shorts down dropping them to his knees, “fuck you like this? Huh? Like being used?” I groan out running my finger down the crack of his underwear. I watch as he burys his face in the mattress.

I frown in disappointment before landing a harsh smack on his ass. “Answer me.” I grip his ass cheeks roughly spreading them despite the fabric in the way.

“Yes!” I give his ass another slap.

“Again.”

“Yes! Fuck- please!” He moans out. I bite my lip and undo my belt throwing it behind me, I yank down his underwear, watching him gasp and squeeze his eyes shut. “What’s your color.” I watch him gulp and bite his lip “g-green”

I smirk traveling my hands up his thighs groping him again “such a good slut huh” I say spreading his ass apart, watching his hole clench around nothing.

“Oh god-please f-fuck me” I whines rutting his hips into the mattress. I grip his hair pushing his head back again, my lips by his ear “did I say you could hump the bed?” I whisper. I suck a hickey right behind his ear.

“No.”

I slap his ass “say it properly” I growl, my fist still in his hair as I pull it again, drool escapes his bottom lip.

“No sir!” He moans out. I push his face back in the mattress, standing up fully again I see his thighs shaking and clenching together, his cock leaky like he doesn’t get fucked every other day.

“Fucking whore, look at you shaking and i haven’t even touched you yet. How pathetic” I say I watch his hand grip the sheets, I smirk walking over to my belt picking it up off the floor.

“Give me your hands.” I say, he lifts his head snapping it in my direction, his eyes trying to scan over my face, my mask making it difficult to do so. I cock an eyebrow “I’m not repeating myself.” I growl. His hands slowly let go of the sheets his eyes not leaving mine as he put them behind his back.

I grip his jaw and shove his face back into the mattress grabbing his wrists roughly and securing the belt around his wrists.

I step back and take a look at him, smirking trailing my eyes down his body. His cock leaking on the mattress, legs spread and back arched.

I reach for his bed side drawer, grabbing a small bottle of lube and pouring it down his ass, watching it drip down his balls to the floor.

“Do you like teasing me or are you just an asshole.”

My head snaps up to meet his, his head is turned to the side and he’s glaring at me, yet he doesn’t look so dominant in this position.

“Drop the attitude.” I narrow my eyes at him he huffs and turns his head “fucking brat” I mumble slapping his ass. My finger circles his hole, pushing the tip of my finger in, then taking it out.

“Just fuck me already!”

My movements pause I move my hand away. I yank his hair pulling his head back to look at me “can you shut the fuck up.” I say through gritted teeth. My free hand moves up to grip his throat roughly, I apply pressure. Not enough to make him pass out but enough to get my point across. Moving my hands back by my side I let his face drop back into the mattress.

My hands move to unbutton my pants. Pulling the zipper down and letting them drop to my ankles.

I palm myself through my boxers my eyes falling shut. I look up at Nick, his eyes watching my movements. He licks his lips my eyes trail down his body.

my movements pick up as I see Nick slowly grinding his hips against the sheets, little whines and moans escaping him.

I tug down my boxers, nicks eyes widen when he sees my cock spring up against my abdomen. “What? Is it to big for you baby~” I tease watching his eyes narrow at me, “don’t flatter yourself” I scoff at him and roll my eyes at him.

I grip his ass, spreading him open my hand wraps around my cock, stroking myself slowly I let my head fall forward, biting my lip to stifle a moan.

Nick whines when my tip presses against him, pressing myself inside him inch by inch. He’s biting the sheets, his eyes squeezed shut “g-god fuck-don’t move yet” Nick whines out. I smirk “I thought I was to small for you” Nick stays quiet, his hands are in fists behind his back and he bucks his hips slightly

“Okay.. move” Nick says quietly, except I don’t, after a moment of us sitting there he lifts his head. “What are you doing move” he says. His lips are parted and theres drool dripping down his chin.

“Beg”

“Fuck off”

“I mean I can always pull out, leave you tied up”

“You wouldn’t dare”

I grin, slowly pulling my self out of him “wait!” I tries to grab ahold of me, his hands not bringing any help “you gonna beg?” He groans dramatically, rolling his eyes

“Please fuck me.” He says in a monotone voice

I raise a brow “you’re joking right” I smirk slapping his ass.

“Please fuck me- I wa- AH~”

I slam back into him, his head falling forward in instinct, my hips thrust at a brutal pace, his muffled moan filling the room.

My hand pressed on his lower back, my other hand gripping his hair pulling his head back. His back is arched perfectly I groan out in pleasure as nicks pornographic moans fill the room

“Such a slut yeah? You don’t care who it is you just want a cock inside you. Messing up your insides.” I thrust harder into him. Watching his eyes roll back and drool run down his chin

“P-please” he babbles, his hips thrust against the bed, chasing his orgasm.

If anyone walks by it wouldn’t be a secret what we were doing Nick couldn’t stop the moans coming out of his mouth even if he wanted to

My pace increases, fucking into him harder nicks hips match my pace, fucking himself on me. I slap his ass “such a good boy.” I groan out next to his ear my body pressed against his back fucking myself deeper into him.

“Fuckkk, I’m gonna fill you up yeah? Fill you up with my cum, watch it leak out of you” I grunt chasing my orgasm

“Oh god please!”

“Please w-what”

“Please fill me up! I need it! I want it so bad!”

my hips increased pace, I pressed his face into the mattress, my hand still gripping his hair as I pounded into him.

“I’m- your gonna make me cum!” Nicks hips rutted against the bed a loud gasp escaping him as he came. I fucked him through his orgasm, my hips stuttered as I groaned loudly coming inside of him.

I pulled out watching my cum drip out of his used hole, smirking to myself I trailed my eyes up his limp body again. My hands reached for the belt, undoing it i let it drop on the floor.

I pulled my pants and boxers up, before picking Nick up bridal style. His arms wrapped around me instinctively as he buried his face into the crook of my neck.

“Let’s get up cleaned up” I spoke softly, making my way out of his room.

•Tysm for reading



[xanaxhydrogen]

walking home from college, but i decide to take a shortcut. i go through a sketchy alleyway. i don't think much of it, even though it's getting dark out i should be fine right?

suddenly someone pulls me in by my waist, i have no time to think before my pants are pulled down and I'm fucked relentlessly. i don't even know the face of who's fucking me, and I'm too busy trying to escape to look. tears roll down my face, im screaming for him to let me go. it just makes him harder. he has me around in this weird hug from behind pose as he's rutting into me.

he tells me how pretty i am, how sorry he is for doing this out of the blue. he tells me how he's been watching me for sometime now and he just had to shoot his shot. i regret taking a shortcut. i should've just went home the normal way.

he tells me how in love he is with me, and how he's so happy to finally be inside of me. all i feel is disgust and shame.

he kisses all over my neck, licking it. it's so revolting. not once does he stop thrusting into me.

i go numb, emotionless. i just let him use me. he changes positions a few times when he realises I've given up, but it's all a blur. all i can remember is him walking me home after freshening me up, holding my hand. i don't have the will left to care.

#mlm nsft #t4t nsft #ftm nsft #t4t ns/fw #ftm bottom #ftm top #corruption kink #ftm ns/fw #nsft humiliation #nsft ftm #r4pepl4y #r@pe fantasy #rough cnc #r4p3 kink #cnc rough #cnc stalking #cnc kidnapping

[boyywithluv]

.

#having a creative rut feeling #gonna rant #im basically a giant baby and i don't handle angst very well #and i constantly worry that im just. idk mentally weak or a deeply uninteresting person bc of it. #every big fantasy artist i see is usually very into making sad or angsty pieces and like i wish i was like that #like i fall into this mental hole very very often that im just holding myself back with how many subjects i dont write or draw #but also like when i DO write dark subjects it doesn't make me feel any better?? #i dont like feeling sad or angry bc once i am its extremely hard to get back out of it. #and thats scary for me. #but also i want to make art that means something instead of my nonestop slew of smut and feelgood content. #i genuinely feel so trapped by my own emotions and its sp frustrating. #i keep getting told how good for you it is to get the negative feelings out but it never helps when i do it #i just feel. worse? i dont feel good. #i kinda wanna delete the one cloud post bc it just doesn't feel good. #ugh #idk i want to have good intelligent things to say and thoughtful art to make #and everything i make feels soft and cheesey and lame. #not that i find those things lame #but just that it feels like im stuck in baby brain. #when i was a teen i would write horror stories!!! i still love horror!!! #but if i make someone suffer in fic now it feels me with this awful awful overwhelming sense of dread and guilt and i end up so upset #im frustrated at me bc this is such a fucking weird sensitivity to have. im tried of telling myself its okay #bc i WANT to feel mentally free enough to create shit that isnt just uwu soft. #i don't think im making sense but like. #you know #I've literally been bullied out of fandom spaces for only making soft content #multiple times. #so idk maybe this is a learned sense of shame #but i feel like a big over sensitive baby and like I'd be able to do so much more if i wasn't #vent ish

[charmac]

PLEASEE POST A NEW CHAPTER OF THE SUGAR DADDY FIC I AM ON MY HANDS AND KNEES 😭😭😭😭😭

Updating All These Nights tonight and then Sugar is next to be updated, promise promise.

#ask #sugar daddy fic #i have been in a writing rut that is known #so i needed to work out some more canon stuff to get the voices back yk? hence updating the other fic first #but also i still feel like the last chapter fell off hard cos i got like no comments #which i know is like 'who cares' but i think i majority switched the style (like for myself) last chapter and i really like it but #if people didnt respond to it #im a little stumped on where to go #(again not in the story but style-wise) #people do not respond to long chapters? people dont respond to the dennis chapters? too much time wasted on sex? idk im #yeah like just a little lost on what people enjoy in the story and what i should gut/cut down on i guess #cos last chapter is hands down my favourite ive written #content wise its close to 6.. #but style-wise i know its so fucking long but i thought it flowed really well and god i love exploring dennis' weird relationship with sex #but to me like only 4 people finished that chapter #to clarify. in my head there are literally only max 10 people who read this thing #and 2 of them are my random friends who arent in this fandom and just want to read what im writing #and neither of them bothered with a 27k chapter.. lol #so im stumped trying to pace the writing and rework how i thought it would go #cos i dont know what people enjoy in the fic!!! and seemingly did not respond to in what i thought was the best chapter so far.. lmfao #sorry you caught me on 30hrs awake and way too much coffee

[radlegowaffle]

how many healers can i draw as this meme magdelene belongs to @pixellyix!

#sorry for the @ i forgot to post this like. two?? days ago #dnd #dungeons and dragons #dnd oc #dnd oc art #artists on tumblr #illustration #dooblenauts #dnd: gathering of the gods #friend art #speed drawing of this at some point whenever i stop being a sad lil shit #the only other time i drew this was qiqi and i think the bg looked better with her sdhflsaifusdhf #perspective is hard dude #also slowly getting out of my rut so im gonna blame that and not my inability to draw #also i changed the pen pressure to something i saw on twitter to 'prevent carpal tunnel' and the lineart is all sorts of fucked #i kinda like it though? some parts have the heavier lineart and its kinda pleasing to look at #wish i could get the lineart like how some people have on sai or procreate. that lineart is SO nice to look at #anyway trying to get back into. not being a sad piece of shit and sleeping all day

[the-kestrels-feather]

Anyone else have big dreams and no idea how to realistically achieve them and a fear of inadequacy so they're worried they're going to stagnate in their current situation because they're too afraid to leave it or is that just me?

#personal #inferiority complex #i have so much shit i want to do #i want to leave the job im im because i dont like it #i want to be using my degree for mkre than i am #i want to be working full time in theagre and/or film #and i keep applying for jobs and just get every door slammed in my fucking face every time #and now im almost 26 so i have to worry about any job i *do* take offering insuramce #and the job im in right now 'much as i hate it has insirance for when i turn 26 #and I'm afraid to leave because of that even though they don't even pay me a livable wage #if i wasn't living with my parents I'd probably be homeless or have 0 savings #and its not like i can really say fuck it and quit and move somewhere more conducive to what I want to do because I have savings #because I need a job somewhere that can pay me enough to support rent and has insurance and those are in short supply #i just feel like shit #i feel like im stuck in this rut and don't know how to get out of it and am never gonna get out #im just exhausted

[chrisbangs]

.

#every now and then i think abt deleting every single social media and dying . like #i really genuinely think abt just dying fr like #👎👎👎 #there's only 1 person i've been wanting to talk to lately #and like no one else lol #i just feel so fucking out of my head #why is everything so fucking bad #i barely leave the basement these days .. i just stay in bed and sleep #and i have less than a week to get the fuck over this random stupid rut i'm in #because fucking classes start on tuesday #i wanna kms so bad lol #like i would rather be dead than do another year of college rn #it's so fucking bad for me lmfao #i don't have any support or anyone to talk to and i feel like i'm going fucking crazy #i'm on academic probation is the best part so if i fuck up this semester i get kicked out which like part of me would love ik like #the part of me that's tired and exhausted and just done with everything i wouldn't mind being kicked out but #the ik . that my parents would fucking kill me knowing that i wasted 4 years worth of tuition money and just fucking flopped as a student #waking up wishing i hadn't woken up every fucking day... i feel sick inside... #my anxiety is spiking all over again and i can barely even organize my thoughts lately #i literally threw up last night cause i worked myself up into such hysterics . like lmfao... #i cant get a grip and i cant get the fuck over how bad i feel and no one fucking LISTENS when i saw i hate this and i'm not good enough for #this fucking subject i wanna fucking kill myself holy fuck it's crazy how much i wanna die.. #i used to wonder abt that 4th year kid who killed himself when i was at my old uni like how fucking bad was it for him that in his last year #he just couldn't take it anymore and now i'm in the funniest position of literally understanding exactly where he was lol #last year... and i cant do it... i just cant fucking do it and i wanna kill myself i think about it every day i think about it 24/7 and #i'm just so... tired doesn't even encompass what i'm feeling right now i'm fucking exhausted and empty and i have nothing left man i cant #fucking do this... every day im dragging myself kicking and screaming to school and dealing with a 4 hr round trip commute in the shitty ass #weather that we get and getting verbally and emotionally abused by profs and getting 0 acknowledgment for ANYTHING and it's not like my work #is even GOOD enough to begin with so ofc it's not gonna get any acknowledgment like jdjdjdkdkskd i just dont . have it in me to do this #for another fucking year... i literally cannot do this... and i have no other thoughts in my head other than killing myself lmfao...

[heartbreakfeelsogood]

i think it’s about time i get taken out back

#op #i’m so anxious and tired and not even walmart is finalizing hiring me like damn #they seemed desperate to hire me is all #she did say to text her if i didn’t get a job offer in the next day but like i have anxiety #also she sent me some number and said it would help with my background check but like i’m so unsure what the fuck her point was #because like i’m pretty sure it’s their responsibility to get the background check run #and i’m not calling some hotline just to sound like an idiot #side note i’m so anxious that i’m going to fall further into a depressive rut working in the walmart bakery #i’ve worked in a grocery store bakery for years and i was starting to hate it #this was my last resort and i already feel miserable about it #and maybe i’m the problem maybe i shouldn’t already feel miserable but i thought i was out of that environment #now i might need to go back into it and it just really sucks idk #plus the hours are. not necessarily preferred for me #it’s fine but idk how i’m gonna do working until 7pm #girl i need sunshine

[apathyfairy]

ok. i’m tired of feeling sorry for myself and just wanting to die. tomorrow i’m going to wake up and do something with my life and be happy and find a way to enjoy my miserable little life

#it’s the approaching midnight curse of ‘i’m going to wake up and change my life!!!!!’ #one if these it’s going to work…one of these days…maybe tomorrow. #fr though i’m tired of being. tired. i’m tired of being sad i’m tired of being heartbroken i’m tired of mourning the unlived life and what #could have been. i’m tired of being pissed about where i am in life and my living situation and the rent prices and all of inflation #i’m tired of being so genuinely upset all the time i’m pretty sure i have a literal ulcer right now because i’ve been so fucking miserable #for the last 8 months living with someone i absolutely despise and i’m literally taking omeprazole like a 40 year old #and i’m sick of it!!!!! i’m sick of making myself sick because i just don’t care if i live or die it’s just not happening anymore #i have to get out of my fucking rut i have to get the fuck out of my own head and stop feeling fucking sorry for myself because well #life is going by pretty goddamn fast which is good and bad i guess if i do want to die but also i want to Live. sometimes #anyway i’m just tired of it i want to change i Need to change or i fr will die and 99.9% of the time i’m like good. but then today is the #.01 where i’m like..wait. so lmao i hate myself and fuck me but i need to make a change for real #it’s just like kelly clarkson said….make a wish take a chance make a change am i right girls