#i didn't even do anything tumblr just hates us all

[mothdruid]

Within the past 72 hours the TGM fandom got a fire put under it's ass, for lack of a better term/phrase. Even though I'm not as active in the fandom anymore, it did make me want to talk about a few things. This isn't the first time that I've had to make a post similar to this, usually speaking about reblogs and keeping your fanfic writers feeling wanted within the fandom spaces, but today I'm going to talk more about fandom etiquette and my experiences in fandom spaces. So, if you want to hear my opinion on fandom etiquette, how I learned fandom etiquette, and my thoughts about the doxing situation that has happened, keep on reading.

My Fandom Experience.

The first fandom that I was ever a part of was The Hunger Games fandom in the 8th grade (if you don't include my anime fandoms). I was 12-13 at the time. This was when I was first introduced to Tumblr and being involved within a fandom online. At the time I was super young, barely even knew who I was as a person, let alone in a fandom space. All I did was reblog little gifsets and fawn over Josh Hutcherson. I remember getting my first hate anon, even though I didn't do anything that would generate that to even happen. Even when I was 12-13, I couldn't understand why anyone would send a hate anon. That was when I found out a friend of mine found my Tumblr and actually secretly hated me, so she sent me hate anons. Still, before I knew it was her I didn't understand.

Fandoms were a formative part of my childhood. I think that main one that helped form me though was the Supernatural (yeah, I know, eye roll), Naruto, and The Hobbit fandoms. I had made friends on Tumblr and Instagram through these fandoms. During these times was when I had first started consuming fanfiction. Specifically, destiel and thilbo fanfiction. This is how I started to find the things in fanfiction that I loved, and the things that I hated. Instead of sending hate to the writers for their thoughts and stories that I didn't agree with, I would back out of the story or just scroll past. Not only that, I also started to use the filters on AO3 constantly, ensuring that I was only reading the fics that I knew I'd enjoy. Also, I was careful to read warnings and tags prior to reading the fic. Never once did I blame the writer for something that I knew I didn't like and accidentally read or read for see what it was about.

After high school was when I started getting into fanfiction writing. I've written for a lot of fandoms during this time. The IT movies, Total Drama, Haikyuu, Attack on Titan, Marvel, Bridgerton, Top Gun: Maverick, and currently ASOIAF. As a writer I've never gotten hate, thankfully, but I have had a lot of friends that have. It's sad to see so many people who take the time to write, whether it's enjoyable or not, receive hate. As writers we are simply expressing our creativity for the things that we love. Since posting fanfiction on tumblr, I have experienced a lot of people pestering for new updates and when the next fic is, and so have a lot of other writers on here. Even though people only know us as a little icon and username, fanfiction writers are people. We have lives outside of writing fanfiction. Everyone also isn't the same type writer. One person may easily write multiple fics every week, some of us take longer, and some of us are even just passion writers (me lol).

The TGM fandom has been one of the most negative fandom experiences I've ever seen/had. It is full of some of the meanest people/anons I've ever seen. From writers being attacked for fic ideas, people being sent hate for something that the anon has full control over, and people constantly expecting new stories to read on the daily. Yes, I do know that other fandoms have these issues, but it seems to be almost a weekly, hell, even daily thing within this fandom. A lot of the issues that I see happen in this fandom are from people who don't understand fandom etiquette.

Fandom Etiquette.

If you had noticed there was a few things I put in bold above. These are key things that I learned during my time that attribute to fandom etiquette. So without further a do, I'll list out some fandom etiquette rules that I follow all the time.

Don't send hate anons to people

Block/unfollow people you don't like

If you don't like an idea or fic, don't read it

Read through all warnings and tags that the writer provided

Use AO3 filters

Don't blame the writer/creator for reading things they created that you actively know you don't like

Writers/Creators aren't "content farms"

There are people behind these blogs/usernames, treat them like someone you'd see on the street

Writers/Creators are expressing love/passion for something, don't hate them for doing that

If you see something fandom related that you don't like, scroll past it or ignore it

YOU CURATE YOUR OWN EXPERIENCE (ESPECIALLY ON TUMBLR)

The Doxing Situation.

For those who are unaware but decided to read this anyways, recently there was a writer (Mama Mayhem) on here who got doxed from another writer in the fandom. Mayhem has since lost her job due to the doxing. This was apparently from her breaking HIPAA by posting a picture into a private groupchat/discord. This picture was posted almost a half year ago. Meaning that the person who reported/doxed Mayhem had known about this picture for months and only recently decided to do something about it.

I'll start by saying that I also work in healthcare, and know many other people here who do. I understand that a HIPAA violation is 100% an offense that gets you fired. I'm not excusing the HIPAA violation if one did occur.

Some people have brought up the idea that maybe the person that reported the picture, and doxed Mayhem, was doing it out of the goodness of their heart. Due to the timeline of it all, that doesn't seem likely. I had a previous coworker get fired for HIPAA violations and it took a total of a week from the initial report for her to be gone.

The biggest thing I want to convey is that TWO WRONGS CAN HAPPEN AT THE SAME TIME. Yes, if Mayhem violated HIPAA, it is wrong. But at the same time, the person held onto this information for months only to use it out of spite, pettiness, and cruelty, is wrong.

My Thoughts.

Due to Mayhem being doxed, a lot of people have decided to leave this platform, take indefinite hiatuses, stop writing, or move to AO3 exclusively., and I don't blame them. I'll be honest, I'm thinking about moving to AO3 exclusively now. AO3 feels a lot more rewarding in my experience. I already only post my fics for ships to AO3, so why not just post everything on AO3 (which I usually do).

I think a lot of people have forgot what it feels like to feel shame in something they say or do. When I say this, it's directed towards people who send hate or do other malicious things in fandom spaces. Fandoms were never this clique-ish and mean. I think it has to do with the pandemic, meaning that a lot of people who would have never joined a fandom did because they weren't allowed to do anything outside of their house. So, those mean girls that made fun of fandom girlies (g/n) previously, joined the fandoms and decided started bullying the people within them.

This situation is super shitty and people are now scared. It makes complete sense, especially after seeing someone, that many of you were close to, be doxed. A lot of people are scared of it happening to them now. I don't think this fandom will be the same after this situation, but who knows, maybe everyone will just forget and move on. Either way, I think I'll be taking a step back from the TGM fandom. I'll still be here, but until further notice, I won't be posting any TGM fanfiction. Maybe a gifset/picture here and there, but I don't think this is a fandom I feel comfortable writing for anymore.

If you've read all of this, thank you.

#moth talks #here it is #sorry it's so long but i couldn't convey my thoughts any other way

[nana-b0b]

》🔞 These panels are censored, you can go to the last of the post to find out where to see them!

A little historical info to better understand:

♡♡♡♡♡!!! I really feel happy and overcome with these panels, I was thinking a lot about how to make them since there were several obstacles: I had never drawn something NSFW before as it should be 😅 I never got that far so to speak, there was always a line that prevented me from taking that step, since it is not the same to draw some small scene where you only see something specific to a whole pose as such and all that implies. But after many ideas and turns I managed to take that step (maybe small for some but for me it was like reaching the moon 😂) and the most important and most feared was that the essence of the drawings and the style would be lost but I could keep it well and make it coexist ♡.

Note: as for the text accompanying the panels I want to say that it's not my best work as a narrator hahaha I don't write anything since I was about fifteen and it was my era of fanfics and stuff, so I feel its very basic and empty! 😅 ♥!

Now, let's talk a bit about the panels! Well, as we all knew this moment was coming, it was no surprise -3- Ryomen really had to be patient to get what he had been thinking for a while, but he didn't want it to be something random as it could be with any woman he wanted, he was really curious to see how Aurora could look like with the full appearance of a lady of the Heian era and when he saw her, he just couldn't resist. One thing will be clear: Aurora won't wear black teeth again, there will be no way to paint her teeth again without someone losing a limb. As for her eyebrows: she's really mad about that, but I'll let it go.

And to close this post I come with a novelty (I've been thinking about this for days) now we are going to be able to have these drawings completely uncensored on patreon.

I'm not going to lie, using more than two social networks for me is already a lot 😥 if it were up to me I would only post everything in one place but we know how the rules are and we have to respect them, if just by showing a nipple (which is a pixel 😂 ) they almost censored me on Instagram I knew this would be difficult and Tumblr is not lagging behind, while there are things that it lets pass there are others that it doesn't and it's not nice to have to make such complex drawings so that the AI doesn't detect them as 🔞 since there comes a certain point that you get tired too and it loses the grace.

My patreon will be the place for all my works 🔞 without any censorship already, you are going to be able to enjoy both public and private content depending on the type of work ♡. I think also for me it's an incentive to be able to start letting go more of my ideas and continue with everything I want to do :)

To say goodbye first I want to always thank you for all the support you give me and all your messages 🖤 and second to warn you that this CAP of Ren will be in patreon already published privately but all the other censored drawings are public for you to see and enjoy them as they should ⭐

Here are the publications that I censored and that you can now see, there are not many at the moment x'D

#sketch #jjk #jujutsu fanart #sukuna ryomen #jjk oc #ransketch #sukuna #jujutsu kaisen

[steakout-05]

eeuuaghh i would like everyone to know that i apologise if i have not responded to your reblogs/mentions/posts on tumblr, i have really terrible social anxiety and for some reason people talking to me makes my nervous system think i'm being hunted for sport by a resident evil boss. sorry if i havent responded i'm not being rude i'm just having a panic attack :P

additionally: social anxiety is actually the reason why a lot of my old posts from late 2022 had weird spacing and spelling mistakes. i was too anxious to type properly

#sorry this seems like a random thing to post but it has been bugging me for a little bit now and i want to post it #and by a little bit i mean the entire time i've been on this website #as for the reason i have social anxiety: i went to a really terrible high school full of dangerous people- #-who were literally like. the worst most bigoted people ever. not everyone there was bad of course but 90% of them were- #-and that stunted by social development by 5-6 years and now every time someone talks to me i feel like i'm about to get murdered #also primary school was. bad. the other kids could sniff out the autism in me and didn't like me for it #this post isn't directed towards anyone specifically but also it kinda is because there's a DM from someone- #-that i haven't responded to in literally 8 months and every time i think about it i get anxious #i'm sorry!!! i'm not trying to ignore you on purpose and i want to say something but my brain literally will not let me out of fear :( #i'm not used to getting talked to directly so every time i do my entire nervous system starts screaming and running in circles #it's kinda ridiculous because it's like. come on. why are you having a panic attack over a message on tumblr it's LITERALLY just words on- #-a screen what are you freaking out about. but also it's like hhhhh unfamiliar social situation scary. help. #unrelated to that but i am very worried about what people will think of me and like i know i really shouldn't worry about that- #-because i can't control what other people think of me and it really shouldn't be any of my or their business. but also- #-i have legitimate trauma that backs my fears up and every time someone is even slightly critical towards me my brain just goes- #-''see? it happened again i TOLD you it would happen again. idiot. you shouldn't have said anything'' #and then i hide and cry and lay in bed thinking about how i'm going to die until i suddenly snap out of it and think- #-''wait hang on why should i care. i love being a weirdo on the internet why should i let my anxieties stop me'' #and then it happens AGAIN and it's just a viscous cycle at that point #be silly on the internet -> detect slight criticism -> think everyone hates you again -> go back on your bullshit after 3 days of crying #and it makes sense because that exact same pattern happened to me countless times as a child. #be silly in school -> get made fun of for it -> get hated for it -> rinse and repeat until you think everyone is dangerous and they hate yo #if i could put it in a metaphor it would be like me being a little rabbit who thinks everyone is a scary wolf because of their big shadows- #-even though they're all also rabbits and i'm just paying attention to the scariest parts of them because i only know what wolves look like #trauma does fucked up things to your psyche lemmie tell you #social anxiety #anxiety disorder #i'm literally the ''too scared to order food'' stereotype except it's not a stereotype because it's real and every time i look at the 7/11- #-at my campus i go ''hm but what if they hate me for the food i buy there'' even though they're LITERALLY SELLING IT what is WRONG with me #anyway um. social anxiety sucks and i don't mean to not reply ro everyone who talks to me i am sorr y

[astrxealis]

damn i never thought i'd get into stardew valley this much but here we are !! makes perfect sense tho

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #heyy this adds to my roster of games that actually have Evidence #gotta play more soulsborne legitimately soon so i have more evidence of my range LMFAO ... #i love how my. taste in games is really broad tbh! i'm willing to try anything out but i do uhh am less inclined to the more popular ones? #unless i get into them by way of. personal. or without outside influence #but if there's a certain something that makes me dislike a media yeah ... i do end up more indifferent tho. ultimately #i think sdv is another huge example of how me and lune really go all in when getting into smth #like terraria. but we end up forgetting about it pretty soon after. oops! #it depends tbh on how bored we are? how much we have to do. so yeah #xiv was That for a very long time bcs we didn't really have anything else uhh insert hashtag xiv was there for us when nobody was #aaa so thankful to xiv fr. idk. i think about what it has done for me sometimes and i get really emotional! #also funny how things connect. i got back into tumblr bcs of jjk and then connected w others mostly thru gi. and then twt thru a friend i #met thru a school event wholy thru chance. who got me back into twt where i connected with others thru ff(xiv) #and i find it fascinating how people make friends irl! i think its easy for me to feel that way 1. its just who i am lol its in my nature #2. im more of a bystander so. yeah. ez for me to study people and people-watch. idm that much tbh #it's funny... hmm interesting? a bit sad too. wnvr i want to. Take A Step Further. i end up not caring anymore LMFAOOO but tbh it's really #nice in the long run! my outlook on life is pretty weird tbh like uhh... idk. hard to explain. complex #whenever i face a problem i'm. absolutely confident i'll get over it. and unfortunately i feel like that... sense of confidence is rather ra #rare*? idk. and the fact i've always known (always!) i'd love myself no matter what. even if sometimes i would be really insecure. i never #truly hated myself and i sincerely doubt i ever will. but the fact i often suceed and rise from my failures that sometimes they don't feel #like failures doesn't mean that uhh i'll end up facing my downfall through. naive confidence? i try to be self-aware and do my best for no #regrets and it's fascinating how my values in life are shaped by my past. not just me. everyone. damn. i think the formative years of a #person are so goddamn fascinating and also i'm still unsure what i want for college but it's already fucking march HELP #anyway wow. i dont want to be too harsh on myself if the What If bad scenario/s end up happening but i'll really try my best #my aunts on my dad side both got into up diliman and i'll be damned if i don't. i know i can do it. i just gotta put in a ton of effort. #okay rambles bye bye #also i've been staying up until 3/4 ever since break LMFAOOO SDV HAS RUINED ME dw i'll be good again next week lmfao

[star-anise]

This is what the fight is like

Sooo, apparently the extremely tenuous and recent nature of the LGBTQ+ community's legal right to exist was not actually super widely known to a lot of people on Tumblr?

Which clarifies some stuff in retrospect. I have so often wanted to grab people by their lapels and shout, "Stop picking on someone for not meeting your entry requirements! We need everyone we can get, you asshole! DON'T YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THEY HATE US OUT THERE?"

Aaaapparently... no, they did not know. Or they knew and were a conservative psyop preparing the ground for our loss of legal rights. Fun times!

So: Look, it is bad. Shit is scary. They really do hate us out there. You're not wrong.

But: This is what we've always fought. This boat we're in with its antique fittings and strange markings on the floor is a battleship. Work has always been going on in the basements, and when shit gets tough, we clear away clutter and roll out the cannons.

I found this chart a couple weeks ago and hung onto it because it felt like the map to my first 25 years on this earth:

[Image description: A graph titled "Same Sex Marriage: Public Polls since 1988." It is from FiveThirtyEight's NYT column. It records the percentage of US Americans polled who would say yes or no to legalizing same-sex marriage, from 1988 to 2011.

The two lines begin with roughly 10% saying yes in 1988, and 70% saying no; the two lines gradually draw closer over the years, until by 2011, the percent saying finally dips under 50%, and the group saying yes makes a tentative reach for the majority. End of image description.]

After some great social change has happened, when everyone has admitted that gay marriage is very cute and Pride is a colourful parade, hooray, people like to pretend that it was just natural and inevitable and happened on its own. People just became less prejudiced! Courts just decided on a case! Governments just passed a law!

In reality, it was a vicious fucking fight, every fucking time. Every fucking where. There are a lot of people who deeply, sincerely believe that a hundred years ago, society had good rules about sex and gender and intercourse and marriage, and that changing those rules has made the world worse. They don't always agree on the specifics, but they can work together far enough to fight anyone with new ideas.

This is why we are a community. Even when we don't have the same experiences of attraction or identity, even when we don't do the same things, even when we have wildly different ideas of a good time. Because when these groups take aim, we're all under fire, and none of us is responsible for why they hate us.

In some ways I think it's a miracle that there seems to be a generation that did not grow up, as I grew up, constantly glued to news reports about What Percentage of Society Hates Us this month. I can't imagine who I'd be if my brain and heart and soul hadn't been tied up, that whole time, in the political question of whether I'd get to dream of a decent future.

I think that it will give us strength to have people who can imagine a world where no one hates us. Who believe in it so strongly they can taste it. That's my prediction: If you didn't know this was coming, you'll be a boon to us, because we have always needed joy so fiercely, in this fight, to keep us going on. We have needed drag queens and punk bands and "her wife" and safe space stickers. Parade floats and wedding days and little dogs with rainbow collars, badges and banners and meetups, because more than anything else we need to fight our own despair, and our fear that the world will never get any better than this.

It will. We know it will. We can taste it.

Look up to the history, organizations, and people who've got us this far for information on what forms of activism will actually advance our political goals. Look to the side to make sure the comrades within reach are keeping their heads above water, and that you're keeping enough joy going to stay alive. Look back to see who's more vulnerable than you are that you might have forgotten or been tempted to leave behind. Look after each other. Look after yourself.

We can do this.

To your battle stations.

#lgbt discourse #staranise original

[the-modern-typewriter]

Hi there!ever since I saw you when I first installed tumblr it just keeps getting better. I was wondering if you can write something about a hero being the sucess of a lab and the villain being a failure(Bonus if the lab is actually evil) Don't feel pressured to do this though😗

"Do you know why I'm considered the success, instead of the failure like you?" the hero asked.

The villain sneered at them. They yanked and thrashed and struggled against the shimmering containment that wrapped around them, warping like a net from the hero's outstretched fingers, forcing them down against the cold concrete.

"Because you're a good, obedient little hero?"

The hero couldn't keep the damn trap up forever!

"Yes."

The simple response, the tone, startled the villain enough that they went temporarily still. Maybe that was the ploy. They stared at the hero through the hazy sheen of their powers, mockery draining from their face, panting for breath.

The hero had many things that the villain didn't: a body that wasn't screwed up, powers that weren't prone to out-of-control devastation, a generally sweet and more palatable disposition when it came to public relations.

And, of course, they did what they were told. The villain had never properly thought about that.

"It was their most important addition, after you...you know," the hero said, studying them. "The ability to control their experiments. To make sure that nothing like you would happen again."

A bad taste slowly flooded the villain's mouth. They shook their head.

The hero stepped forward, crouching down in front of the villain, on the other side of the containment wall. Up close, the villain got a good look at the vein snaking up the hero's wrist. The blood was just slightly the wrong colour; it made them look gorgeously healthy, radiant, compared to the sickly pallor the villain couldn't quite shake.

"If I stop taking the serum for my powers, I die," the hero said, keeping their voice light. "Quite horribly. But while the serum is in my system, I'm not in control. Not really. Everything I do is monitored. If I stray too far out..." The hero grimaced.

"Why are you telling me this?" the villain whispered.

"Because I can't do anything about it. I can't do anything about them. I signed up to do something good, to make the world better, and I..." The hero squeezed their eyes shut. "Well. I'm going to try and drag you back to them, aren't I? I'm going to hand you over to the people who hurt you, and then I'm going to make a speech telling everyone what a terrible, awful monster you are as if they don't deserve everything you give them. I'll smile while I'm doing it too."

The villain swallowed. They strained to press a hand up against the wall, but it only forced them back down against the ground harder. The villain's breath knocked out of them.

The hero winced. "Sorry."

"Isn't it better to be dead?"

"You didn't think so when you ran."

No. Maybe that had been an unfair question to ask. Still, the fury and the helplessness of it seared through the villain because ShieldCorp - they were going to get away with it. All of the others were dead! Even if they managed to expose what was really happening, ShieldCorp had the hero.

"I wanted to do something good too," the villain said, hollow. "It's not your fault they took advantage of that."

The hero shrugged. Their hand stayed perfectly steady.

"Are they listening to us now?"

"Probably."

"They'll be angry with you."

"Maybe. Maybe not. Me telling you this doesn't change anything, does it?"

"I thought you were like them. I hated you. It changes that."

The hero smiled, or something like it. It was too fragile, too wobbly, too shattered a thing compared to the beautiful thing they tossed out to the masses at every public appearance.

"I want to destroy them," the hero said. "But, when I let this force field drop so I can take you in properly, I'm going to need your help to do that. How are your powers feeling today?"

"Like I'm going to burn down the world."

The hero nodded, just once, and rose again. Silhouetted against the skyline, they looked unstoppable.

"Excellent," the hero said. "On the count of three, start with me."

The villain was ready when the containment dropped.

ShieldCorp was not.

#heroes and villains #villains and heroes #lab experiment #writing #ficlet #short story #fic #writeblr #writing snippet #story snippet #villains #heroes

[josnhoes]

Platonic!Yan batfam with young adult reader. Part 2

[Part one]

Note: Reader is 18-22 years old. Gn reader

Content warning: being treated like a child, being looked down on, stalking, obsessions, soft yandere but still a yandere, reader has memory issues and it's ambiguous as to why, drugging, mentioned abduction, delusional batfam, batfam as a whole basically view you as a child younger then Damien despite you being older

Focuses on Tim Drake

---

For the following week you'd noticed one or a few of the bat brood following you in the evenings. You weren't sure *why*, but it did make you feel a bit safer so you didn't complain. It was Gotham, any sense of safety was welcome.

The small book shop and coffee place you worked at didn't get a ton of customers. It was a hole in the wall style place, sometimes it got new customers but a majority we're regulars. There were also a few college students who used the late hours to buy a single coffee, then use the free wifi to do class work. Today's shift had you on coffee duty.

The bell chimed, signaling a customer or what you *hoped* was a customer. You looked up and were flabbergasted to see Timothy Drake, the co-ceo of Wayne enterprises. Normally you didn't pay much attention to CEOs of anything, but the Waynes were like the poster family for Gotham. One way or another you learned their faces and the names.

As he approached the counter you did your best to smile and not seem nervous. "Hello sir can I help you today?"

The look he gave you almost seemed to be taking you apart peice by peice; assessing you down to your soul. "I'll take a large coffee and as many shots of espresso as you can legally give me. For here."

You supposed today was going to be one of those™️ days. "Of course sir. Feel free to sit where ever you like. Would you like something to eat too?"

"No thanks." He seemed to soften now and once you gave the total he paid with a nice tip. Though he chose the spot closest to you to work. Probably because that was the best area for wifi signal you supposed.

You got his order out fast since it looked like he needed caffeine more then oxygen at this point. As you placed the drink down you had the urge to talk to him but decided against it.

Tim had been having a trying week. He could balance his nightlife and the company fairly well; but the addition of you had been a problem. He didn't know what it was about you that pulled him and his family in. He'd gone over your entire life that he could find multiple times now, and nothing ever changed. No secret identity, no shady acts, aside from some strange tumblr activity you were clear. Mind you all activity on tumblr was weird as he came to see. The entire batfam either made accounts just to follow you, the ones had them already followed you too.

The family adored you and he...was no exception. He tried to be, the way his family was spiraling and for one civilian was alarming. But he couldn't fight it. You were special. You *needed* them to keep you safe. You obviously couldn't be trusted to do it on your own, just today you forgot to lock your home.

While yes it made putting the cameras in your home easier, it also meant that you could have gotten robbed or worse. You'd admitted to being spacey at times online, made a joke of it but it was dangerous.

He finally took the time to sip on the coffee. It was good, better than most places he had. You clearly knew your way around the machine. Would you make him coffee in the mornings? Tell him to have a good day as you called him your favorite big brother? He needed to know.

The more he watched you, the more he worried for you. What if you got hurt? Not even in a rogue attack but in general. You obviously cooked for yourself, and cleaned. Knives and chemicals? Too dangerous for his baby sibling, and he hated knowing if something *did* happen you might be alone.

He'd speed up the family's preparations for you. You'd fight them at first so they had to prepare a special room. But you'd see how well they cared for you, how much they all loved you, and everything they could provide. Hopefully the room will be ready soon.

#platonic yandere batfam #platonic yandere #yandere #batfam x reader #dc x reader #yandere dc

[mikachacha]

𝙹𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚘𝚞𝚜𝚢 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝙲𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚒 (𝙹𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚘𝚞𝚜! 𝙱𝚊𝚍𝚊 𝙻𝚎𝚎 𝚡 𝚃𝚎𝚊𝚖 𝙱𝚎𝚋𝚎! 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛)

Synopsis: You're trying to help your group promote your choreography for Hwasa's chili by doing a solo. What you didn't expect is for your video to blow up, attracting the people's attention and having a lot of people trying to flirt with you which made Bada, your girlfriend, very jealous.

Warnings: language and jealous Bada

(A/N: i have lots of fun making this 🥺🥺 thanks anon for your wonderful suggestions love ya 🫶🫶)

(Edit: i posted this earlier but tumblr is a hating bitch rn and deleted the bottom half right after the a/n)

🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸

You woke up fairly early that morning, Bada went to the studio to prepare for her class while you went out to jog. After your jog, you thought it was a good idea to record a video of you dancing to Chili by Hwasa and using your group's choreography to also help promote your group. You picked out a quiet spot before you set your phone to start recording.

When you were finally satisfied with your video, you posted it on instagram. You didn't really expect anything when you posted that video so you just went on your day, totally forgetting about it Sowoen face timed you, the camera pointing at Bada who's currently sulking. You're confused and amused at the same time, you could hear the other girls laughing in the background and teasing Bada for being sulky and jealous.

"What happened to her? Why is she like that?" you asked Sowoen who were barely able to contain her laughter as Bada just lied down on the floor, looking like a kicked puppy, whining about everybody simping over her girlfriend on the internet that made the others laugh even more.

"Y/N-unnie your video is really viral right now and Bada-unnie is mad because everyone is literally simping and flirting with you." you heard Minah explain off cam. You quickly check your instagram and your notification is blowing up with thousands of likes, comments and new followers. Your dm's isn't doing any better. So many messages from random people and some pretty big names, all of them telling you that you're amazing at dancing. You couldn't help but giggle while reading some of the comments then you saw Chocol and Haechi's comments on your video. Even Akanen and Ling left some praises on your video. You had to bite the inside of your cheek to prevent yourself from laughing, now understanding why Bada is acting that way. She must've read the comment Haechi left on your video that made her very jealous.

"I'm just gonna get changed then head over to the studio so please tell Bada to calm her jealous ass." you said and soon got ready to meet Bada and your team. When you got there, Bada was already by the entrance waiting for you. A huge pout on her face before engulfing you in a hug. You smile and hug her back, whispering reassuring words to her so she can calm down.

"I'm proud that you're getting the recognition that you deserve but then I saw most of the comments are talking about how sexy you looked during the part where you twerked a bit then also there are people flirting with you.." Bada ranted and you could see the others watching not too far away, giggling at how their leader is currently acting.

"By others flirting with me, you mean Haechi? Baby, Haechi and I are just good friends. I chose you, I chose to be with you. I'm yours and no one is taking me away, okay? I love you, Lee Bada even if you're all jealous right now." you assured her but couldn't help tease her at the end because you rarely see this side of Bada, the jealous part and you found it extremely adorable. She just shot you a playful glare before kissing you on the lips, finally having calmed down from her jealous and sulky mood.

You returned the kiss and dragged her back to the studio where the others waited before having a genius idea of posting a video of you and Bada dancing to Chili and maybe goof around so she'll feel better.

"Another episode of Bada-unnie being so whipped for Y/N-unnie. Never gets old.." you heard Cheche comment and you giggled, agreeing with the younger member of your group. All of you posted a video of dancing to Chili then goofing around before you pulled Bada so you can have a video of just the two of you together. Both of you are all smiles while dancing then she decides to kiss you at the end, making you blush. She grabbed your phone and posted the video without any thought, feeling pleased with herself. You just rolled your eyes at her before kissing her cheek.

"Jealous ass.." You teased her and she pinched your cheek playfully which you reciprocated.

"Can't help it since my girlfriend is just way too hot." Bada retorts and you smile at her, just placing kisses all over her face. You could see your other teammates making exaggerated gagging noises through the mirror to which Bada responded with her middle finger raised.

#bada lee #bada lee x reader #bada x reader #swf2 #swf2 x reader #tumblr fucked me over

[hjparisian]

birthdays through the ages- harry j potter x reader

p: harry j potter x gn!reader w: none just fluff summary: (y/n) helps harry celebrate his birthday throughout the years a/n: disappeared for a hot min and tumblr changes its layout?? anyways dont mind that this is late and long. decided to try second pov again for this story to see how i feel but idk. what do you guys prefer? (y/f/c)= your favorite color

You've been friends with Harry ever since your guys first year at Hogwarts. One day in first year, you, Ron and Harry were talking about birthdays since Ron's twelfth birthday was coming up. Harry had mentioned that he never really received anything, counting that the Dursley's hated his guts.

From that moment on, you decided to make Harry's birthdays the best.

second year

This would be your first year getting something for Harry. You weren't sure what exactly to get him, considering you didn't have much saved from your allowance, also because he was trapped with the Dursley's.

You had decided to make you and Harry matching friendship bracelets with some beads left from an early interest of crafting. You made both bracelets using red and (y/f/c) beads. It was simple, not wanting anything too flashy for Harry incase he actually wears it.

You had also made a card for him and added some candy from a previous trip to Honeydukes. You packed everything off in one bag before sending your owl to deliver the gift.

When you finally met up with Harry at King's Cross Station, your eyes light up as you see the bracelet on the green eyed boy's arm. Harry came up and gave you a hug.

"Thank you, (Y/N)."

third year

This year, you had actually saved up and set aside money to be able to afford a present for Harry. During a trip to Diagon Alley with your parents, you had wandered into a little shop that carried jewelry and charms. As you were ready to give up, something caught your eye.

It was a golden snitch charm.

It was a little on the pricy side for the charm, but you'd still have a bit of money left over. So you bought it. The store owners had given you the option to put an engraving on it, so you did, opting to put Harry's initials on it.

Once you returned home, you decided to bake treacle tarts for him, with the help from your mother. While the treacle tarts were baking, you had gone to your room to make Harry's birthday card, signing it with a heart by your name.

The next morning you had sent your owl to deliver the gifts. When the owl had returned later in the evening, it had a letter in its beak from Harry. It was him thanking you for the presents and making his birthday better, and that he loved the charm and had attached it to his school bag right away.

fourth year

The summer of Harry's fourteenth birthday was a bit wild in your opinion. You would be spending a couple weeks in America with your parents. Unfortunately, this was during Harry's birthday so you couldn't send his presents on his actual birthday.

Fortunately for you though, Ron had invited you to join him and his family to watch the Quidditch World cup. He mentioned that Hermione and Harry would be there as well. You had decided to give Harry his present in person. Your owl is probably thanking you for this genius decision.

While on your trip, you had stopped by a clothing store and spotted a red jumper. You had remembered that Harry didn't really have a lot of clothes of his own, most, if not all, were hand me downs from his cousin Dudley. You had decided to buy it along with a shirt for him.

The night before you had to go to the Weasley's, you were getting Harry's gifts together. But it felt like there was something missing. It need more of a personal touch.

You search your room for something until you came upon a little heart charm with your initial on it. Should you make another bracelet you wonder? A different idea pops into your head though. You grab the red jumper and find thread a similar color to it. Turning the jumper inside out, you take the left sleeve and place the tiny charm under the cuff and sew it in.

You wrapped the gift and set it aside your luggage so you would remember to take it with you. As you finally head to bed, you felt a little giddy about giving Harry his present, hoping he'll love it.

Thankfully, he did.

Harry was in his shared room with Ron, who was asleep. He was looking at gift you gave him and decided to try the jumper on. He felt something in the left sleeve and rolled it up to find the small heart shaped charm with your initial on it.

The boy couldn't help but smile.

fifth year

This was the first year you'd actually be with Harry for his birthday, though this was due to unfortunate circumstances from Harry's side as well as the Order coming back together.

You were brought to 12 Grimmauld Place around the same time as Ron, due to your parents being invited to the Order. Though because of this, you didn't have an opportunity to find a present for Harry, which resorted you to your baking skills you started developing in third year.

After asking Sirius for permission to use the kitchen, you get started on working on Harry's favorite, treacle tart. Things were going pretty well, but then the boy you were making the treat for had entered the kitchen, which you should've been expecting.

"(Y/N)?"

"Oh, hey Harry," you said to him.

"What are you doing here?" He asked.

"Just baking, what are you doing here?"

"Oh uh, I was looking for you actually," Harry said. "I was just wondering where you were."

You smiled a bit, enjoying the fact that Harry was looking for you.

Harry cleared his throat before speaking. "So, what are you baking?"

Now, should you be honest with him and tell him that you were making something for him? Or lie and push him out?

"Well, I'm making treacle tarts, for you."

"For me?"

"Yes, for you. I was gonna surprise you with them after dinner," you told him.

"Oh," he said. "Guess I ruined the surprise, I'm sorry."

"I suppose you did, but I don't think it matters anyways. You'd still eat them won't you?"

"Of course I will," Harry said. "They're delicious. I still remember when you made them for me for my thirteenth birthday."

You were a little surprised that he remembered that.

"My mom helped me with them," you said. "I've gotten better though. Been able to do it myself." Harry just nods.

"So," You began. "Wanna learn how I make them?"

Harry smiles and gives a nod as you start getting another batch ready so the rest of the occupants of 12 Grimmauld Place could enjoy some. The outcome was a bit messy, but it was enjoyable nonetheless.

Harry likes to think this was one of his better birthdays thanks to you.

sixth year

For Harry's sixteenth birthday, you managed to convince your parents to let you go to the Dursley's house to attempt to take Harry out for his birthday. You side apparated with them to the house and was being given a lecture on being careful and sticking by Harry before they left.

It was a bit awkward when Harry's uncle Vernon had opened the door. You can feel his piercing eyes judging you once you asked for Harry. Lucky for you Harry had appeared right behind Vernon once you asked. It didn't take much convincing to take Harry out, Vernon seeming delighted to be rid of the boy for most of the day.

You and Harry arrived at a cafe for lunch, since both of you hadn't eaten yet. The both of you had ordered your desired meal and chatted about the summer, Harry telling you all about the terribleness of the Dursley's. When it came time to pay, Harry was about to take his wallet until you took the check and handed the money to the waiter.

"You didn't have to pay for me you know?" Harry told you as you exited the cafe.

"Of course I have to!" You said. "It is your birthday after all. So, what do you want to do now?"

The two of you spent the day doing whatever Harry wanted, which felt odd to him considering the Dursley's would always ignore him but he felt some sense of happiness. There was a small arcade in town that you and Harry went to. Harry won most of games but sometimes he'd let you win.

Your guys next stop was to the movies to watch one of the new movies Harry was interested in seeing, but of course, the Dursleys would never take him, especially since their little Duddy-kins hated it. You guys decided to just share a popcorn together. Everytime your guys hand touch, you'd feel your cheeks heat up but you were enjoying the little touches. Little did you know, Harry was feeling the same way.

Your guys final two destinations were the dinner and the park, deciding to kill two birds with one stone by bringing take out to the park and watching the sunset.

"Thank you for everything (Y/N)," Harry said to you.

"Of course Harry. It's your birthday and I wanted you to be able to have the most of it."

"I appreciate it, I really do."

You smiled at him. "I'd do anything for you, Harry."

seventh year

This would be the year Harry would be of age in the Wizarding World. Mrs. Weasley had been planning a party for Harry, considering everyone would be residing in the house for Bill and Fleur's wedding the following day.

Earlier in the summer you had gone to a jewelry store in Diagon Alley. You remember Harry saying he had been wanting some more rings, as he's been wearing a ring Sirius gave him prior to his death.

As you were browsing, one of the clerks had approached you and showed you a special ring, with a twin. It was one that would warm up based on how fast the heart beat of the other ring holder is. You were sold on it, planning to keep the second ring to yourself.

After breakfast the morning of Harry's birthday, you asked him to meet in the room he was staying in privately. Hermione, knowing what was going on, helped by keeping Ron away from the room.

"So what did you brought me up here for?" Harry asked as he closed the door behind you.

You pulled out the small box with the ring from your pocket, handing it to Harry.

"I wanted to give you your present privately. Happy birthday Harry."

Harry took the present from your hands and began to open it. He pulled the ring from the box and examined it. It was a silver band with a small heart engraving on the inside of it. Harry put it on his left middle finger and started to feel a slight warmth from it.

"It's a magical ring. It gets warm based on how fast the other person who has the second ring is." You told him, bringing your hand out showing a similar ring to him. "I have the other one."

"I love it. I really do." Harry told you.

You felt your cheeks heat up. "I'm glad you do."

Whether it be some spurt of confidence or you not thinking, you decided to do something a bit bold and kiss Harry's cheek.

"Let's head back down. Don't want them to wonder why we were taking long," You told him as you grab his hand to pull him out the door.

As you guys head downstairs, the both of you could feel the rings warm up again.

post war

Harry's birthday came too soon to him. Having successfully defeating Voldemort what felt like not too long ago, he had no interest celebrating. Why celebrate when so many of his loved ones died because of him?

You had no intention of pushing Harry to do anything for his birthday, but you still wanted to remind him that it is a special day. You woke up before Harry to prepare him breakfast. As you were finishing up, you heard some foot steps entering the kitchen.

"Love?" a voice said.

"Morning Harry."

"What are you doing up so early? Usually I'd be the one that wakes up first," he says as he comes over to you, wrapping his arms around your waist.

"I was preparing breakfast," you told him as you plate the eggs you made.

"You woke up early for that? I'm always fine with waiting for you to wake up to start making breakfast."

You chuckled a bit. "I did this because it's your birthday Harry. Just wanted to surprise you." A small oh leaves Harry's mouth.

You brought the plates to the table and started pushing Harry to sit down and start eating. Once you finished your plate, you stood up and placed your dishes in the sink.

"Give me a second, I'll be back," you told Harry.

When you entered the room, you went straight to look under the bed, grabbing the box that contained Harry's present. How he didn't find it? Only Merlin knows how. Grabbing it, you went back to table the table and handed it to Harry.

"Happy birthday Harry. Open it."

The boy unwrapped the present, revealing a book with a plain black book. He grabbed it and opened to the first page which had a photo of you and him together back in first year and another with eleven year old Harry and Ron. As Harry turned the pages, he saw that all of them contained memories from their years at Hogwarts. From him catching his first snitch, to the Yule Ball, to one of the Quidditch parties in sixth year. As he got toward the end, he realized there were still empty pages left.

"I know Hogwarts might be the last thing you wanna think about right now. But I thought this would remind you all the good stuff that happened," you said to him. "I left some pages empty so we could continue it together."

"(Y/N), this is wonderful. And you did this yourself? Where did you even get these photos?"

"That's a secret I'll never tell," you winked at him.

Harry stood up to give you a hug, your arms wrapping around his well toned body. Being in his arms felt like home.

"I love you so much," Harry told you.

"I love you too." You said to him. "Now, my dear Harry. What do you think we should do today?"

"In all honesty," he began saying. "I just wanna spend the day with you and cuddle. Maybe make treacle tarts."

"As you wish love," you said, as you play with the two rings on Harry's hand. One was the ring you gave him on his seventeenth birthday, and the other was his engagement ring.

#harry potter #harry potter x reader #harry james potter #hjp #harry james potter x reader #hjp x reader #hp fanfic #harry #hp imagine

[deanscherrypie69]

Tell Me You Love Me D.W.🌧️

Dean Winchester X!GirlfriendFemaleReader

Warnings: 18+ is advised! language(maybe like twice?) angst sm angst- sad Dean and Sad Reader. I’ve been trying not to use Y/n in many of my fics but.. lmk if you like this way better!! Pls don’t post my stories anywhere except tumblr 🩷

Feedback is always appreciated!! Don’t forget to comment and reblog!! My inbox is open (Not for requests tho!)

🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️

“Just say it Dean, for me?"

You watch as Dean knocks back another shot. "Can't-" He says twirling the small glass between his finger.

You’d been poking him for hours, you knew he felt the same way… right?

You groan hoping off the bar stool. "I need some air." You mumble grabbing your jacket off the chair. Dean feels the cold air hit his back. He looks over his shoulder and watches you disappear outside.

He had known what you had wanted him to say it But he couldn't. He couldn't bring himself to do it. Part of him was sacred. Scared of loosing you.

🌧️🌧️🌧️ Once outside you tugged your jacket closer to your body, it had been a windy day in Kansas. It was about to be fall, your favorite season.

You watch as the leaves begin to fall from the trees.

The bar wasn't to packed tonight. There had been a few cars in the lot including Dean’s

You press your body against the brick of the budling. A stray tear falls down your cheek. It had been threating to come out. You had been with Dean for about two years now.

You have loved him, a lot. And he knew that, you even told him.

"I love you Dean."

The words you had told him after a bad hunt. You remembred him looking at you, he didn't say anything. And that hurt you the most. So ever since then. You'd been begging him to say it. But he wouldn't.

Why were you two even togther then? You thought.

Leaning off the brick wall you storm back into the bar.

Dean was still where you left him, instead of shots he had switched to a beer.

"Why are we even togther?" You breathing was ragged as you stood behind him. His body face the bar.

Dean spins around in his chair. "What.” He says with a confused tone.

"Why. Are. We. Togther." You repeat. Your voice was laced with anger. A few people had turned around in your direction.

Dean reaches into his pocket. Hr throws a few twenty dollar bills on the counter for whatever he was drinking, and for the half of beer you'd had earlier.

"Come on." Dean says reaching for your arm, but you quickly pull away. He knew he was in deep shit. Never once have you not wanted him to touch you.

Dean opens the door to outside, letting you step out first. The cold air hits his face, oh how he hated this type of weather.

Once outside you spin to look at him. “What are we doing Dean!” You shout throwing your arms up in the air.

Dean huffs and reaches into his jacket pocket, pulling out his keys.

“Get in the car it’s cold out.”

You roll your eyes and follow his orders. Walking to the passenger side door you open it. And slide inside.

Dean follows suit. He closes the car door behind him.

“What are we.” You say turning to face your boyfriend.

The green eyed man turns to look at you.

“You’re my girlfriend.” He says with a smirk. You can smell the alcohol on his breath.

You shake your head and begin to fiddle with the sleeves of your jacket.

“Doesn’t feel like it.”

Dean adjusts in his spot.

“Dean-“ You shake your head. “You know I love you right?”

Dean nods at your words. “I know,” he says reaching over to put the keys in the car.

“Why won’t you say it-“

Dean puts the car in drive and begins to drive away. “Seatbelt.” He points.

You huff and ready over to put it on.

“You can’t avoid the question Dean.” You say with an attitude.

Sure he can, he always does. He thinks to himself.

Dean reaches over and turns on the radio. Something Def Leppard by plays softly.

Your anger has begun to boil back up. Why had he been avoiding the question. All you wanted him wanted him to do was tell you he loved you.

“Stop the car.” You say reaching to pull your seatbelt off.

Dean doesn’t listen he continues to drive.

“Stop the car!” You repeat.

Dean presses on the break. The car door flies open. You fling off your seatbelt then exit the car. "Dean!" You scream, looking up at the night sky. You felt a few rain drops on your face. "I can't keep doing this." Your voice cracked, with hurt.

You look over to see Dean leaning on his car with his arms crossed, "Why won't you tell me?" You say with a sniffle.

Dean 's eyes don't meet yours instead the meet the ground.

"Just say it Dean, please." You give the green-eyed man one last chance.

He lifts his head to look at you, "I can't-" he says his voice breaking.

You nod, slowly backing away from the man. You begin to walk down the darkened street.

"Where are you going!" Dean shouts.

Not responding you walk faster, the heels of your boots clicking on the road below you.

You gasp when you feel a hand on your arm. You freeze in your spot. You knew it was Dean, you could smell his cologne. You felt his breath on the back of your neck.

Dean spins you around to look at him. "Let me go Dean." You warn.

His eyes were soft. “You wanna know why I can't say it??

“Why.”

Dean huffs, “I’m scared Y/n I’m so fucking scared-“ he begins. You watch as Dean swallows hard. “I’m scared of loosing you-“ he says with a shaky breath. “Everything I love, eventually.. leaves me. Or- something worse. And I don’t want that happening you. I couldn’t live with myself if it did.”

Dean had a stray tear slip down his cheek, you reach your hand up to wipe it away.

Before you could reply, rain starts falling down on you both hard.

Your eyes never leaving Dean’s, “you’re not gonna loose me Dean, I’m not gonna let that happen.”

“How do you know?” Dean says.

Both of you were soaked with rain but you didn’t care.

“Because I love you, and I always know that you’ll be there to protect me, no matter what.” You say with a laugh. “You’re not gonna loose me Dean Winchester, cause I’m not going anywhere.”

Dean nods at your words, his tears were mixed with the rain. “I love you.” He says grabbing the back of your head, bringing your lips together.

Dean was the first to pull away. “I love you too.” You pull away from him and begin to dance in the rain.

“Dance with me!” You squeal jumping around.

Dean doesn’t leave you hanging for long he begins to swing you around and around.

He loved you. And you loved him. You couldn’t ask for anything more.🩷

🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️

Lmk if you’d liked to be added to my Dean tag list!!🩷🩷

#dean winchester x reader #dean winchester comfort #dean winchester angst #dean winchester fanfiction #dean x you #dean winchester fic #supernatural dean #dean x reader #dean winchester #dean winchester imagine #dean winchester x you #dean winchester fluff #dean winchester x female!reader #supernatural fic #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural fanfic

[queermania]

I don't want to start drama and I don't expect you to respond to this but I think you deserve to know what's being said about you. tumblr. com/transfagbenny/738678589192552448/and-id-appreciate-if-we-stopped-using-the-terms

i actually am going to address this because this person has been lying about what's been going on for months and they've apparently been harassing other people for months if not years, so. it's time to put an end to this.

before i start though i want to make it abundantly clear that if you take this as an opportunity to do anything other than block this person, then you are trash. do not send him messages. do not tag him in things. do not harass him in any way. leave him alone. if you need to block, do so and then move on. hate mail and harassment is disgusting behavior and i don't want to be surrounded by anybody who engages in it. and if you do it on my behalf, i think you are worthless and i want nothing to do with you.

so, this is what happened: back in february of 2023, an anon asked me if i had any opinions that would get me canceled with the dean girlies. i replied, "oh now we’re talking!! hmmmm let’s see. i don’t care about benny at all. deanbenny does nothing for me. deanbenny is dust. it is dust. drowley rights forever" and i did not tag it because i'm not an asshole. bear then sent me a message that at the time i thought was funny/cute because his url reflected that he was obviously a huge benny fan. we had a very cordial exchange. everything was good. we chatted a little bit about how neat it would've been if benny had been played by a black actor and how the racism problem with gordon would've been fixed if gordon had been played by a white actor. not all of our conversation is visible anymore (and i also don't think all of it was on this post anyway) because i've since blocked him so his replies no longer show up on my posts. the point is: everything was fine. it was a good tumblr exchange. he continued to follow me. i did not follow him then or at any point.

the problem is that he kept coming onto my posts and into my inbox to try to make things about benny. that is not okay. i had already said that benny was a character (and deanbenny a ship) that i was not interested in. to me, this is an obvious boundary i've established that he repeatedly crossed. it's not an egregious violation, obviously. more than anything it's annoying. what he should've done, if benny was that important to him, was unfollow me and move on. but he didn't and i indulged him for awhile but at a certain point i thought, "okay maybe if i stop indulging him, he'll take the hint." so i stopped responding. he did not take the hint. he got worse and he even started commenting on things that he couldn't make about benny, just to willfully misinterpret things i said and taking them completely out of context. unfortunately, i don't have receipts for any of this because at the time i didn't know it was going to become an actual problem (however I have since learned that this is an established pattern of behavior he engages in, so you can probably find examples on other people's blogs).

it got so annoying, though, that i very carefully broached the subject in a private server with people i trusted. without naming any names or using any incriminating language (i.e. not specifically referencing benny), i basically said that there was someone being annoying about a specific character on my posts and i wasn't sure what to do about it. immediately, a handful of people replied with some variation of "the benny stan? he's been doing that to me too." i do have receipts of this (and an entire server to back me up) but i hope you can all understand why i'm not going to provide those or name names (or ask anyone to get involved publicly). the point is, it became apparent that i wasn't the only one and this was a pattern of behavior. i also learned during that conversation that bear has a history of harassing people and calling someone racist or a transphobe if they block him.

at that point, i decided not to rock the boat. i would just continue to ignore him and maybe he would get bored and move on. well that obviously didn't happen. he kept doing it and as a fun added bonus, he started to make vague posts about me. the thing is i don't actually care if he vagueblogs about me. it's his blog. he can do whatever he wants. it's none of my business. i mean i personally think he should've just unfollowed but, again, his blog, his choice. it is annoying that every single time he would do it, someone would send me a link or a screenshot of him doing it, but that's not really his fault. so, again, i just ignored it.

this is where we get to the incident in question. after a private discussion among a small group of friends, i posted this obviously joke poll at the insistence of @letterstothedevil, a tumblr user who has given me permission to include her in this.

the original message about the poll:

the permission:

now EYE think it's abundantly clear that the poll was a joke amongst friends, but maybe it wasn't, and i'm not going to fault anyone for not magically knowing that. i am, however, totally willing to fault someone for being a gigantic asshole. bear commented on the post and i, admittedly, gave a somewhat dismissive response because at that point i was so tired of him being willfully obtuse and twisting every little thing i said that i just didn't want to bother. he then went and made a series of not-at-all-vague posts calling me racist and claiming that i simply do not care about the racism in the show and it's obvious because i've never ever discussed it on my blog (which is a hilarious lie given that i'd specifically discussed it on my blog with him). at that point, there was no reason not to block him. he was already doing the thing that i didn't want to deal with. so i did. and i thought that would be the end of it.

again, i was wrong.

i then started to get anon messages daily about benny and deanbenny and how i'm racist for not liking benny, etc. this was harassment that EYE was on the receiving end of. nobody else was a victim of the messages i was being sent. they were sent to me and it is not my job to make sure other people are protected from the harassment that i am experiencing. i'm pointing this out for two reasons: 1. because i did try to protect bear from it for awhile anyway. i knew that people would assume it was him and at the time i was still giving him the benefit of the doubt, if for no other reason than the fact that i didn't think he could send me messages since i blocked him. and 2. because when i did finally start to respond to some of the messages, bear acted like he was somehow the victim in all of this (and continues to act that way to this day).

i don't know if bear had (or currently has) anything to do with any of the messages i get (which, thankfully, have slowed considerably). what i do know is that at no point during any of this happening did he stop looking at my blog and vagueblogging about me.

when i finally did answer a few of the messages, bear had a bit of a meltdown about it. i know this because he used a separate account that i hadn't know existed to message me and because he talked to one of my friends about it. (i'm not going to name that person but if they want to get involved publicly of their own accord, that's up to them lol). i'm also not going to share screenshots of what bear said to me because he explicitly asked me not to (it's also the reason i'm not sharing screenshots of the numerous receipts i have of the things he's said and lied about on his blog but, unless he's deleted any of them, you can go and find the posts yourselves.) what i am going to share is that in the message he sent to me, he flat out lied about his behavior. he told me he hadn't been vague-blogging about me, that he would never ever do that about anyone, and that he would certainly never harass someone (all things that i have receipts of him doing).

it took me awhile to respond to this message because i was still trying to be gracious about the whole situation. i recognize that he is much younger than i am and i think it's important for me, as a full blown adult, to take that into account. i had a private discussion with a few trusted friends about how to handle this because it was important to me to not let him off the hook for his behavior and for lying just because he's young. this is what i ended up saying:

his response was to double-down on his lies (while, hilariously, vague-blogging about me and the whole thing) and then go into victim mode about something so completely unrelated and far-fetched that i decided i simply wanted nothing to do with him ever. (this is when he asked me not to share screenshots, so i won't, but this is me saying that i have ALL of the receipts, bear, so if you continue to lie, you will not like what happens.) i blocked his alternate account and tried to ignore him.

the harassment continued. again, i have no idea if he was actually part of it. the vagueblogging continued. he started to do it to other people he associated with me. many of them blocked him because of his behavior. i continued to answer some of the hate i received, continued to ignore and/or block most of it. it got so bad that i was sent seizure bait on more than one occasion, one time bad enough that i actually ended up going to the ER. there are receipts of all of this, too. you can see on my blog the messages i've been sent. i think at one point i even shared a snapshot of what my inbox looked like. i've shared privately with friends (who can confirm if they want to, but no pressure) screenshots of the kinds of messages i get that i don't respond to. the point is, that for a period of months, i was relentlessly harassed. and at no point during this time did i say anything to or about bear (or anyone else). the most i've done is respond to messages that have been sent to me. i've largely sat quietly while this thing happened to me and bear continued to make posts about me and act like he is somehow a victim in this. he's assumed things about me and my identity. he's violated boundaries i've set. he will not let this go. and i'm not the only one he's doing it to.

i'm so fucking tired of it. leave me alone. leave my blog alone. leave my friends alone. leave any and all of the people who have blocked you for your own inappropriate and obnoxious behavior alone. that's it. that's the end. none of this would be happening if you would just respect other people's boundaries. i don't want you on my blog. i do not want to interact with you. i don't want anything to do with you. that's it. the end.

#replies #anonymous #wank for ts

[clownrecess]

It really pisses me off how often public schools ban stim toys.

Almost everyone stims, it isnt just a neurodivergent thing. Neurotypicals and neurodivergents stim, neurodivergents just do it more and in more obvious ways.

Personally, I need to stim with something physical nearly always. Sure, I stim by rocking, flapping, etc. but most of the time I need something in my hands or my brain blocks everything out and I eventually cry because of how icky I feel. If I can't write a damn tumblr post without taking a break every 15 seconds to fiddle with a tangle or my hoodie strings while I hum noises relating to every word I've already typed just so I can write another sentence, I sure as hell can't sit and listen to an hour of information on something I don't even care about without a stim toy/tool.

This is why I hate the fidget trend so much. Yes, it makes stim toys more available, but it also gets them banned in schools because someone who doesn't even benifit from them cant stop being distracted by them. And then suddenly, everyone "must be distracted by them".

Back when I was still in public school, I used this sensory braclet a lot (I still have it, but I care more about fashion nowadays than I did back then, and it doesnt match with anything, plus it barely helps anymore, so I dont really use it.) that was very clearly a sensory thing. It's orange with silicone prickles all over it. It wasn't a distraction. It was just something I ran my fingers over in class. Well, suddenly its being taken away and nobody will tell me why. Anyone want to guess what happened? Yeah. I had a panic attack a few minutes later (I dont expect much else from that teacher to be honest. One time she threw away my art project because I folded it wrong even though it's been known and on my file since about 1st grade that I have motor issues. And no, she didn't let me retry. I just had to sit there, made to feel terrible because I FOLDED SOMETHING WRONG!).

#stim toys aren't distracting #the fidget trend is harmful #tw ableism #tw panic attack #ableist teacher #actually autistic #neurodivergent #autism #aac user #nonspeaking autistic #nonspeaking #disabled #neurodiversity #ableism

[antiphilosophia]

Crowley's pre-fall name is BARAQIEL (THEORY)

THIS POST MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS OR RATHER CLUES FOR GOOD OMENS SEASON 2 CONTENTS, PROCEED WITH CAUTION 🤍

Very well. Who doesn't love the Crowley is the Archangel Raphael theory (I am certainly of those people who do). During my first watch of Good Omens S2 I was even somehow almost confident that that was the case.

However, my second, more careful, viewing of this lovely (but equally heartbreaking) season made me change my mind, likely for good. In episode 4, Furfur's book "Demon's Guide To Angelic Beings Who Walk The Earth" shows us a name of a certain angel Baraqiel. (see photo below) Knowing Good Omens that can hardly be a coincidence.

Unfortunately, the very text is quite unreadable. One thing, other than the name, which is pretty clear is the subheading "Angel of the Sky" and since the episode 1 lets us take a look at how Crowley did indeed take part in creation of what is to be seen in the night sky, one can hardly find that entirely non-fitting. One other sentence I was (at least I think) able to read is "Often draped in red."

(On a different note but certainly worth noticing are scribbles that generally just roast Crowley – his suspiciousness, hair and name (though I am not absolutely sure of the latter) "His hair is bad!" Wow, Furfur really does hate Crowley.)

Then there is something written above the name of Baraqiel, unfortunately in none of the picture frames does it get a bit readable. I wonder though, couldn't it be "former"? Since it comes precisely after mention of Crowley to whom should one report on Aziraphale.

Crowley is very powerful. Dominion

A word that is not exactly readable but can be deduced from its placement (it is situated just as Aziraphale's "Principality") is Baraqiel's rank – Dominion Angel. It should be noted here that I very much lack proper knowledge of either Jewish or Christian mythology and I would hate to provide any incorrect claims. I therefore think it is better for me not to overly state things, even more so since everyone can look into it on their own and figure out what that might mean for our beloved demon. What I will say, however, is that they are (as I understand it) very powerful and, placed within the 2nd triad in the angel hierarchy, ranked higher than the Archangels. This would go well along with the emphasis that was in my opinion laid on Crowley's powers quite a lot this season.

For example: "A miracle of enormous power happened last night. The kind of miracle only the mightiest of archangels could've performed," said Shax to Crowley, to which he replied: "How'd you know I didn't do it?" He didn't get an answer.

What I think (and I may be very wrong, obviously) is that a miracle of this vastness wouldn't have happened simply because of a regular angel and a regular demon did together half a miracle each. What is also worth noticing is that the tool with which Crowley created the Nebula is the same as the one he used to temporarily stop time at the end of season 1 right before Satan's arrival. So much to the size of his powers.

Baraqiel, lightning of God. Fallen angel

Finally, to Baraqiel himself. My lack of knowledge concerning this matter still stands and frankly I don't even know where to find valid information about angels and such on the internet. Baraqiel should, however, stand for "lightning of God" and is also regarded as the angel of lightning. In season 2 there are (as far as I remember) two occasions where Crowley is put in correlation with lightning. (1) His poor anger management issues in episode 1 and (2) his not at all better matchmaking in episode 3 ("I haven't done weather in ages"). Furthermore, Baraqiel is considered to be the one who taught astrology to people. Nevertheless, what points to Crowley and Baraqiel being one even more is that Baraqiel is indeed a fallen angel.

•

So... That is probably it. I usually tent to theorize about stuff in quiet, in fact, this is the first time I've used Tumblr for anything other than reading Neil Gaiman's posts. I didn't even think that I would actually post it but then I've searched on Twitter, TikTok and here on Tumblr if anyone else has already come up with this theory. The only post I could find (hopefully I haven't missed anything) was by @valaza_04 on Twitter (click here) where they refer to the same frame shot as I do here.

Now I know, we are still recovering from heartbreaking (but if you ask me, absolutely amazing) finale and the main thing currently on our minds is figuring out why would Aziraphale choose as he did and the many wonderful theories that come with it. However, considering the utterly virulent look that Metatron shot at Crowley before walking out of the bookshop with Aziraphale and also his "Well, [Crowley] always did want to go his own way. Always asking damn fool questions, too." makes me think that he absolutely does not care for Crowley and whichever angel he was before the Fall. And I reckon it won't remain unnoticed in season 3 and might even be really important (or that is just me wishing for more pre-fall Crowley scenes). Hence I decided that I will post this. And it doesn't matter if no one will see this in the end, it was quite fun to write. However, if there is someone who will read this all the way through, I hope they will accept my apology for the mistakes I have most possibly made (English is not my first language) and also for the ridiculous length this post has come to gather. It turns out, I am just as chatty of a writer as I am speaker.

Well maybe I will come around to write one more post about this theory, only with a proper research this time. Till then thank you and, please, support this season by streaming as much as you can so we can have season 3 of this masterpiece of a show. And be kind to those bringing it to us in your comments regarding the ending, even though it is very frustrating and heart-shattering, it is also maybe the best ending we could have hoped for with the prospects of season 3.

Thank you for letting me talk my heart out, Tumblr.

#good omens #good omens season 2 #good omens spoilers #go2 #go s2 #crowley #pre fall crowley #crowley's angel name #good omens 2 #david tennant #neil gaiman #aziraphale #good omens theory #baraqiel

[psychwxrdd]

Chapter I

The Collector (1965)

Summary: Rafe Cameron is obsessed with y/n. Unable to make any normal contact, he decides to add her to his "collection" of pretty, preserved objects, in the hope that if he keeps her captive long enough, she will grow to love him.

🎀 - this is a personal adaptation of the classic The Collector, i love the book and the movie as well and i haven't changed practically anything except for the characters. all copyright to John Fowles, i don't own any of the credits or characters, this is just a fanfic on tumblr for my obx girlies!!

also, rafe is non canon, it's just his looks and name to be honest, cause everything else is just loyal to freddie clegg. lmk what yall think about it!

Rafe Cameron's POV.

Whenever she was home on vacation from boarding school, i used to see her almost everyday, as she lived right in front of the Figure 8. I often saw her leaving and entering the house with her sister and, sometimes, with her friends, who i didn't cared about. I was used, when i freed myself for a moment from the files and statistics, to stand at the window, and, through the frost-fogged glass, i observed the street. Then watching her pass by.

It was the best part of my day: Admiring her beauty. My heart always felt waves of love at her sight, i could phisically feel it. At night, at home, i recorded the incident in my journal, initially with an X and, later, when i discovered her name, her initials. I also met her, several times, on the street. One of the times she went to the door of the Public Library, when i stood behind her in a queue. She didn't even looked at me, but I saw her head and her very beautiful hair clearly. I could feel her scent, her sweet, heavenly scent. Only once, just once, before having her as a guest here, i had the privilege of seeing her hair completely down; It was so beautiful, like a mermaid, i had to take a deep breath. She looked just like an angel, what could i do?

I mean... I'm me. Rafe. I'm the bad guy, the most hated person of Outer Banks. Not even my family likes me, what chances did i stood with such a pure creature like her?

I didn't knew it was possible for an angel like her to exist in a filthy earth like ours.

Another time, on a saturday morning, when i didn't had to work and i went to Country Club. She was there. I immediately saw her sitting three seats in front of me, facing me, and so i was allowed to observe her for thirty-five minutes. Seeing her always made me feel as if i were capturing a true rarity, as if she was carefully bringing me closer, silently, to a butterfly with very beautiful, diffuse colors. I always thought of it as something indefinable and rare, as well as refined — not in other words, even the most beautiful ones. Words from an authentic connoisseur. I knew nothing about her when she was still at boarding school, except that her father was a doctor and that, as i heard, her mother drank a lot. I saw her mother once in a store: she had a high-pitched voice and it was obvious that, in fact, she was trouble. Cursing at other customers for a bottle of whine.

I later read in the local newspaper that she had won a scholarship, that she was very brilliant, and that she had a name as beautiful as herself: Y/n. I then learned that she was studying art. That newspaper article was immensely important to me, it was as if we had become acquainted, as if we had suddenly become intimate, even though, of course, we still didn't even knew each other. She didn't knew me. But, from the very first time i saw her i knew that she was the only one for me. I never saw anything so dreamy, so gorgeous before. And i'm not crazy, of course, since I knew it was just a dream, which it would always have been if it weren't for the money. I used to daydream about her, making up stories about me meeting her, admiring her, marrying her, and so on. She painted pictures, and I took care of my collection (in my dreams). She liked me as much as she liked my collection, whose pieces she drew and painted; We worked together in a big, beautiful modern house, in a huge room, with a huge glass wall.

We had local group meetings, where instead of saying nothing, for fear of making a mistake, we were the very popular host and hostess. Y/n was always the most beautiful of them all, and the other men never got tired of admiring her... She was mine. It didn't mattered who wanted her. Y/n was my girl, she would always be.

The only times i didn't have pleasant dreams about her was when I saw her with a certain young, pretentious, noisy man. Blond, a bit smaller than me, from The Cut, probably. I met him once, while waiting to deposit some money, and heard him say: “Give me everything in five notes." The check was only for ten, and the guy thought it was funny. He thought he was cool shit. Well, i saw her get into his van several times and, on those days, she was always very unpleasant towards my colleagues in the office. I then refused to mark her initials in my journal of entomological observations. It was on those days that I allowed myself to have nightmares. She would then cry or kneel before me. Once, I even let myself dream that i punished her for betraying me like that. Maybe that was when it all started...

In one of the sunday newspapers, i saw a large advertisement for a house on the properties for sale page. I hadn't looked for that section, but the ad caught my attention when I turned the page. The title was: "AWAY FROM THE CRAZY CROWD?” Just that. I then read what the advertisement said: Country house, old, privileged, charming situation, large garden, one hour from Kildare, by car, two miles from the nearest village. And so much more. The next morning i got in the car and went to see it by myself. I called the agent and arranged to meet his representative. That's what money gives us. It makes everything easier for us... there are never obstacles. I had expected to find an old house, dilapidated and in a terrible state of repair. There was no doubt that it was old. The exterior was black and white beams and stone slabs. The seller was already there when i arrived. I thought he might be a rude old man, but it turned out he was an well-educated type, making all kinds of not very witty jokes, as if it were not worthy to sell anything - and there was some difference between selling items in a store and selling houses. He immediately displeased me because he was very curious. I think I can still say that i didn't go there just to see if the house was in a suitable location for me, but to have a guest without anyone knowing. What we do next always makes us forget what we did before. The guy wanted to know if the house was just for me. I told him it was for my stepmom. We were already going downstairs, i thought that we had seen everything. I was getting ready to tell him that the house wasn't quite what i wanted, that it was too small, to make him feel even worse when he told me that we had already seen everything except the cellar and the basement. So, there was a basement?

We had to go through the back, where there was a door next to the kitchen door. We went down some very dark stairs. The lights were off, of course, but he had a flashlight. The basement was very cold and damp, being so far from the sun. The walls had been whitewashed a long time ago, and the lime had begun to fall off, giving way to mold that accumulated in the dampest places. The cellar continued throughout the house, as he told me, and there was another cellar, a few steps below, to which I was led through a small door. It was even bigger than the previous one having a lower, arched ceiling, like the basements that sometimes exist under churches. “The ideal place for orgies,” he said.

"What is this cellar for?" I asked him, ignoring the fucking stupid comment. He replied that it was thought to be because the house was so far from everything and because in the past it was necessary to store large quantities of food and other reserves. It was even possible that it had been a secret chapel of the Catholic Church. Well, we return to the surface and go out into the garden. When he closed the door, it was as if that basement had ceased to exist. It was as if there were two worlds. And that's what it has been. There are certain days when I wake up in the morning thinking it was all a dream, until i return to the basement.

The salesman looked at his watch.

"I'm interested," — I told him, — "very interested."

I was so nervous that he looked at me with a surprised expression. The man said that he had to go get another client who was also interested in the house, and i told him that i would stay there in the garden and think for a while, to be able to make the final decision. It was a very pleasant garden, with the back part covered in lucernes. Ideal plant to attract butterflies. The field behind the house extends to a hill. To the east, on both sides of the road, the woods extend almost to the town. To the west, more fields. The nearest house is a mile away, over the hill. On the south side it was very beautiful. Despite being somewhat hidden by the trees in the garden and the fence that surrounds it. The garage is excellent.

I quickly got into the habit of closing the garden gate. It was, in reality, nothing more than a little door, but it had a lock. Although i still saw some people peeking through the fence, the local people soon realized that it was better to leave me alone. I was finally alone, and only then was i able to dedicate myself to work.

I used to do a certain number of housework, which my dad had taught me. So, i was able to decorate the basement room very nicely, although saying so seems vain on my part. After adding several layers of felt, i covered in white, which went very well with the pink walls. I furnished it with a bed and a chest of drawers, a table, chairs, etc. The small bathroom that had already been installed by the firefighters was separated from the bedroom by a partition, the entrance to which was covered by a beautiful screen. I also made shelves myself and filled them with lots of art, porcelain dolls, books and novels, to try to give that underground room a princess, Y/n look, which I finally achieved. I didn't risk putting pictures on the walls, as i thought her taste must be very advanced. What was her favorite movie? Her favorite band? I was dying to know. I wanted to know every single thing about her, i wanted her to tell me. To cry in front of me and confess her deepest fears, to laugh in her purest way.

One of the biggest problems was, of course, the issue of doors and noise insulation. I therefore had to make a heavy oak door to separate the two sections of the cellar. I must say this was my hardest work. The first one I made didn't work, and I had to make another one, this one much better. No man could broke into that door, let alone a small, fragile girl like her. It was two inches thick, completely lined with metal on the inside, so she couldn't try to pierce the wood, and it was no joke getting it on the hinges. On the outside, I adapted an open closet with shelves, where i placed some tools, so that, if someone entered the first cellar, the door would be disguised, and no one would even notice that there was another room lower down. Everything was quite perfect and, for greater peace of mind, i installed a small electrical alarm system, in case someone wanted to enter the first cellar during the night.

And despite those preparations, i had never thought all this time that the thing was serious. I used to say, talking to myself, that I would never carry out that project: that it was all a simulation. And i would never have had that idea if it weren't for all the time and money i had. In my opinion, many people who may seem normal now would also have done what i did, or similar things, if they had been given the time and money to do so. I mean, doing the things they want to do, even though they know they shouldn't do them. An old teacher of mine always said that power corrupts man. And money is power.

Another thing i did: I bought a lot of clothes for her. Colors that I had always seen Y/n wear. Makeup, everything i knew she would love. I mean, i thought so. I just wanted my darling to have everything. I took every precaution possible and imaginable.

I got used to going and sitting in Y/n's room, trying to figure out if she could escape from there. I had to make sure she would never leave, i had created the perfect dollhouse for her. Did she liked butterflies? I hope so.

tags: @h34rtsformilli 💕

#rafe cameron #drew starkey #obx fic #outer banks #obx #rafe cameron x reader #rafe x reader

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I were to report my ex friend's antisemitism to their university?

So I 20nb have been friends with most my current friend group since we were 11. Two years ago I stopped being friends with a guy in my friend group due to toxic behavior on his part (not antisemitic yet, just giving background info) He would constantly say things like "don't make fun of neurodivergent people's special interests and hyperfixations as they can't help it" and then would go and make fun of my special interests (note: said ex friend has ADHD). Over our friendship he had a lot of double standards like that and one day I had enough. The first time I brought it up he dismissed it as someone else in the friend group did the behaviors I'm accusing him of. I kinda dropped it as I didn't want to deal with that level of denial and thought that if I waited a few days he would have had some time to reflect. So I brought it up again and he continued to blame it being one of our other friends doing it and that I was simply "misremembering". I gave specific examples and rough time frames yet he continued to deny it. All I wanted was a simple "I'm sorry and I will work on that" yet he refused to do that. So I ended our friendship.

Since then we have been on rocky terms. We are still in the same friend group since the issue was between me and him, I didn't want to involve my friends and make people pick sides. He was moving away soon at the time of the end of our friendship so it wasn't like I was going to see him when the friend group all hung our together.

Since we are still in the same friend group, he is in the discord server our friend group has which is just like a massive group chat with things categorized into topics.

Recently there is the current conflict going on in Israel and Palenstine. I am Jewish and vented to the vent section of that discord server about how I have seen people I know irl post online antisemitic things. I am very much against Israels actions and made sure to include that in my vent so no one coukd twist my words. I didn't initially say exactly what I was seeing as I was still processing the fact that I was going to have to cut some people off.

He then replied to my vent saying that he has never seen anything antisemitic online and that if he has, he has seen Jewish people saying that it isnt. I replied that his reply to my vent was weird and that i was talking about people saying that all jews should die. I felt hurt as yet again he was being hypocritical towards me as he has said before that you should say that (what he said) when people complain about seeing hateful things towards a group (eg racism, homophobia, etc).

He then responded that I was only calling him antisemitic because he was arab. The thing is, I never called him antisemitic and I myself am also arab. (Yes I know, most people have never met an arab jew but we do exist).

I pointed out that I never called him antisemitic and I am also arab which he seems to have forgotten. I said that his response was still weird considering what he has said in the past about people who say what he said. I then invited him to dm me privately to discuss things further if he wants to as it's not fair to do this in front of all of our friends.

He did not respond and ended up blocking me on discord.

This irked me quite a bit but in the end I decided that him blocking me was for the better if he stands by his original response. I was talking to my partner about it who is not Jewish and he said that my ex friend's response was definitely weird and the fact that he was so quick to defend himself about being called an antisemite without even being called it was indicative that he probably is. I decided to look at my ex friends tumblr to see if there was anything to suggest that and there was. I saw a few posts which he has recently reblogged which used anti Semitic dog whistles like the echo, example: (((insert text you which doesnt say jew but you are implying jewish people are))).

I was quite appalled to see that and am debating if I should send it to his university. The university he attends has spoken out about antisemitism before and has kicked out people in the past for using racist dog whistles due to a potential danger to POC students so it is likely that he would get kicked out for using antisemitic dog whistles.

In my mind, he fucked around and therefore should find out aka face natural consequences for his actions.

WIBTA if I contacted his University about his antisemitism?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[sturniolowhore]

☁️ YOUR TOUCH, MY OXYGEN

summary ⎯ your matt's best friend and have wanted him for as long as you can remember. one day when you're at the triplets' house, they decide to go hang out with nate but you decline and claim you're sick. you can't help but touch yourself in matt's bedroom but then the door opens and matt's staring straight at you.

warnings ⎯ smut, matt × fem!reader, cursing, slight degrading, hair pulling, praise, not proofread !

A/N⎯ my first smut, i'm kind of nervous to see how people will like it but let me know what you think. i also don't know how to use tumblr properly so ignore if anything isn't proper.

i hope you enjoy <3

❛ ━━･❪ ִ ࣪𖤐 ❫ ･━━ ❜

the sight matt sees before him practically makes his breath hitch and the nerves inside of him twitch all over. he's just come home, a few snacks gripped firmly in his hand, and left nate, chris and nick to continue hanging out alone because he doesn't want you (his best friend) to be alone for too long seeing as you had claimed you had a headache and didn't want to leave their house, simply staying in matt's room as you waited for all of them to come home.

matt more than expects to find you resting or doing something that doesn't require much willpower at all given that you're sick. he most definitely does not expect you to be leaving feathery touches all over your own body, beautiful whines escaping your plump lips routinely as you rest against matt's pillow desperately. the door was only minimally opened when matt originally made his way upstairs but one small moan from you made the elder boy open the door further and lay his eyes upon one of the most wondrous things he had ever seen, if not the most wonderful.

matt's eyes can only seem to widen when he hears a gentle release of his name from your mouth. it takes him undoubtedly by surprise but he finds that he wants to hear it a million times over, especially due to how gone you both look and sound all by yourself. you haven't yet noticed him watching you and you merely proceed to make yourself feel better, desperately moaning his name and whining more uncontrollably than ever. it's like music to matt's ears and he can't help but enter the room, almost going unnoticed but not quite because of the small shutter of the door closing.

your movements go entirely still and you are so very startled as you look up nervously from where your eyes were previously trained, your eyes now connecting with matt's silhouette that watches over you in an emotion you can't entirely read. a smirk is playing at the older boy's face and oh fuck, you want nothing more than to kiss him senseless, until both of you are unaware how to say anything besides one another's name. this is exactly why you crave him so often.

"matt–" you're both breathless and trying to recover as the name escapes your lips, hiding your body with any article of clothing you can find and your cheeks certainly flushed red out of embarrassment that matt has seen you in such a state and heard his name leave your lips at such an intimate time.

"you always touch yourself to the thought of me or is this just a one time thing?" matt asks you with no hesitation at all and you can't help but splutter on air, your finger nails clutching the sheets beneath you with a nervous look at his words.

"i have no idea what you mean," you attempt to lie because you can't imagine how matt's going to take this, you certainly don't want to know if matt will end up hating you for feelings you have tried time and time again to ignore or if he'll find you ridiculous for wanting him and turn you down, crushing you and your desires to have him whole.

matt doesn't reply, instead he turns around and clicks the lock to the bedroom door so that now neither of you can leave the room even if you want to. you furrow your brows in confusion as you take in the actions and then you begin breathing heavily as matt approaches you, slow and steady, discarding the bag in his hands instantly. you can't help but exhale sharply as matt shoves your body, making you fall onto his bed with a small thud and groan due to the suddenness.

your eyes are following matt intently and it's only a few moments before he is placing himself between your spread and bare legs, his clothed cock slightly rubbing against your core that is twitching at the new sensation and thought of yourself being the only naked one. it feels so fucking dirty but in a good way.

"matt what are you doing?" you question slowly but matt's finger moves to your lips, silencing you as he moves it into your mouth with that gorgeous smirk still playing at his lips.

you wrap your lips around the finger and begin sucking when matt instructs you to do so, your core now throbbing harder than ever and wanting nothing other than attention from matt who holds this glimmer of lust in his eyes as he watches you swirl your tongue over his index finger and squirm about at the close proximity.

"oh look at you, even my finger does so much to you," matt comments, making sure to grind onto you and stimulate a small whimper.

he removes his finger from your mouth and then he's kissing you, hungrily and roughly. your oxygen in this moment is the pure bliss matt is providing you and you're breathing it in, in and in. you kiss back so desperately, feeling like matt will run away if you don't and that this will all be part of your imagination, another fantasy you've created in your head if only to satisfy yourself.

it isn't just a fantasy though and in that moment, you think matt has never looked more beautiful. his hair is rustled from your hand continuously tugging on it and his lips are beginning to swell from the aggressive making out that you can do nothing but indulge in.

you pull apart, matt first, the two of you ever so breathless and you don't think you've ever felt as alive as you do right now. every single nerve inside of you is alive and your mind is racing at more than a million thoughts per minute but they're all centred around matt and exactly what you want to do to him and what you desire for to him to do to you.

"come on baby, you never answered my question," matt reminds you, his hands touching any part of you he can reach until they at last reach your exposed clit, rubbing it once and twice and watching you squirm and gasp under his touch and him clearly loving the way your body reacts to him too easily.

"fuck, all the time matt. i think about you all the time when i'm touching myself. i wish it was you, pretend it's your hand on me," you start to ramble between the soft noises matt is causing you to make through the swiping of his sensual fingers against you.

"yeah? you're not sick are you baby? you just wanted to stay home and touch yourself like a little slut," matt murmurs as you dig your nails into either side of yourself, holding the sheets as though you have no other purpose because you're being driven to absolute insanity and you want it more than anything.

"please," you manage to whisper when matt starts to move his hand against you at a dangerously slow pace but even so, you're a mess beyond words at the small touches.

"please what? use your words y/n," matt encourages, lifting you so that you're sitting up and leaning against the smooth headboard of his bed, with your hair falling onto your face and sticking to your forehead from the sweat that covers it.

"touch me please," you manage to get out, your head going further back if that's even possible given your current position.

matt moves closer, closing any remains of distance between the two of you and enters a finger inside of you before moving it at an alarmingly fast rate, making pretty whines spill out of you instantly. you place your hands behind your head as he inserts two more fingers and continues his perfect rhythm inside of you. you moan particularly loudly when you can feel yourself getting closer and matt chuckles lowly, ceasing his movements and giving you a miniature smirk.

you almost plead, "why did you stop? please i'm so close matt, i'll be so good for you. i'll be so good, let you use me however you want."

and matt must believe you because he continues his fingers scissoring you rapidly and getting you closer and closer to tipping over the edge by the second. it's one particularly rough hit to your g-spot that makes you spill all over matt's hand and he cockily smiles to himself. he takes his cum coated hand and smears it all over your chest, loving the glisten that allows the light to hit it perfectly and admiring it as though it is a piece of art.

"get on the floor by the door," matt's command doesn't waste even a second of time but you're of course very curious and speak up.

"why-" you don't get to finish though because matt tugs on your leg roughly, a look of somewhat warning plaguing his eyes.

"you don't get to ask questions baby, whatever i want hm?" he reminds you and your smile is sheepish as you slowly comply and make your way to the door, standing there with your body on display, feeling both anticipation and excitement.

"be a good girl and get on your knees," and you do exactly that, dropping to your knees with your eyes never leaving matt as he sits on his bed, the very bed you were touching yourself on moments ago, the very bed he had caught you heaving his name. it turns you on knowing as such and matt can see as much, giving you a little smug smile from across the room.

you can't lie when you say you're practically drooling as matt begins to remove his clothes so that now you're both on display. you've seen matt topless before but something about this environment makes him look greater than ever and you want to kiss all over his tattoos and suck on his perfect skin.

despite the two of you being on display, you still feel the most vulnerable as you've promised matt he can use you however he pleases. the idea both makes you tingle and panic but it's matt and god you'd let matt do the world and more to you without so much as a word of protest.

"go on y/n, crawl to me like the little bitch you are," matt says after a while and you know it shouldn't, you really do, but it turns you on beyond belief.

you obey immediately, getting on all fours and crawling at a slow, teasing rate until you're right in front of matt in the same position. you look up to meet matt's eyes and the want inside of them makes you want to crawl to him all over again.

"you're so beautiful baby," matt compliments as he raises you so that you're on your knees once more, looking up at him with lust that makes his pupils dilate.

you smile largely before your eyes subconsciously move to matt's cock, eternally desperate to get it inside your mouth until you're struggling to breathe. matt looks towards you and you can read his eyes flawlessly. he looks to you as though you look so beautiful with pleasure swimming in your eyes and your lips that are moving to insinuate exactly what you want. who is matt to deny you of any desires if not an idiot?

"take me y/n," matt says and it's all you need to take him in your awaiting mouth, bobbing your head up and down and lapping your tongue all over the surface as you adjust to the length, feeling ever so full.

matt's hand flies to your head, pushing you down further and feeling the vibrations from you moaning on his leaking dick, causing him to let out an involuntary moan of his own that you think is heavenly. he clearly knows it's hitting the back of your throat perfectly but he doesn't stop because he doesn't want to. he keeps pushing you further, guiding you all throughout and letting moans now fall out of himself at the way your mouth feels like heaven on him.

you slowly start to gasp for breath, trying to move back but matt's grip is tight and he's not loosening it until he gets exactly what he wants. he's getting closer and you helplessly swirl your tongue some more, dragging it to the point his eyes are half-closed with pleasure. through the peeking of his eyelids, he sees you try to take a break but he's having none of it and pulls you onto him with a rough tug. you palm the places you struggle to reach and one last push of your head makes his cum pour into your mouth like a faucet. he pulls out of your mouth that is so incredibly full and pants heavily, head thrown back for a few brief seconds.

"swallow it," he smiles and you do what he commands instantaneously, your chest heaving fast as you're now able to breathe properly and take in the sight before you; matt looks so pleased and his eyes lack the usual sense of blue you adore yet this new found darkness almost makes you sigh out of euphoria.

he gets up after a moment of catching his breath and regaining himself and walks to the door and your smile fades as his footsteps retreat away from the bed. you frown at his behaviour and then he stops in his tracks when you softly voice the thought on your mind.

"you're- you're leaving?" your tone is upset as you see matt move closer to the door, you were honestly hoping you would get more, hoping you would get to feel matt inside of you the way you have always dreamt of.

"is there a reason for me not to?" matt faces you again and you want him even more when you see the starstruck look in his eyes and the flawless mould of his body; he's like a statue sculpted for beauty with his smooth skin and flushed cheeks and nose.

"i want you," you mumble just clear enough for him to hear and matt could absolutely ruin you because of how soft and delicate he thinks you sound in contrast to the lust pooling in your eyes.

"you want me? you're going to have to be more specific for me to understand," matt's teasing and you know it but honestly, you'll be teased all matt wants if it means you get to have him, to feel him inside of you even once.

"want you to fuck me until i can't walk," you state and then he's rushing to you, kneeling to sit on the ground and pressing you against the bed from your place on the ground.

it's then that he starts sucking on your collarbone, painting the surface in purple and red as you moan when he sucks on the right spots. your head is thrown back, leaving extra space for matt to continue and then you're out of this world in want.

"please matt, please fuck me," you beg matt and matt allows you to get up and sit on the bed, your legs dangling off the edge and wondering what his face would feel like between them.

"since you asked so nicely baby," he hums, looking around for a moment until he spots a condom inside the drawer of his bedside table.

he picks it up and smiles at you with a smile that makes you want to never leave his room, "all ready to be used by me y/n?"

"please matt," you respond and now matt definitely can't deny you of this opportunity.

he rubs his fingers sensually on your ass and lets them linger there for a second or more, you're too gone with desire to tell, before he's forcing into you with no warning. you fall onto the pillow with a heavy whimper and matt pulls you up again through your hair, making sure to pull it extra roughly which makes you whimper even louder.

"keep still baby," he whispers in your ear, biting on the earlobe as he begins moving his dick inside of you.

his movements are slow at first and you're fooled for a few moments before you feel his cock move out and slam into you aggressively. you try your very best to remain in your position but matt's ploughing is making it nothing short of difficult. his hands are still pulling your hair aggressively and the action is making the hairs on your neck stand up on edge. he moves out and slams back in yet again, repeating as such as you moan without any sense of control, loving the feeling and wanting it again and again and again. he knows exactly what he's doing which just makes it all the more hot, your cheeks burning up even more.

"keep fucking still y/n or i'll make sure you don't cum," matt groans and lord you're so far gone, you can't even attempt to form a coherent reply.

"fuck, fuck, fuck," you yell as your face is forced into the covers by matt who groans as he hits a particular spot inside of you, his own whimpering music to your ears.

he lands a slap to your right cheek and then your left, red imprints lingering for a few seconds before fading into the skin that feels like it's on fire.

"matt- fuck i can't hold it," you muffle against the sheets and he only seems to laugh, landing yet another slap that makes you bite at your bottom lip, almost drawing blood.

he loves the way your body lunges forward every single time, yet another beautiful noise leaving your mouth whenever he so much as moves slightly inside of you and he makes sure to tell you as he mercilessly rams into you.

"hold it y/n, you feel so fucking good around me," matt denies you and you feel like you're going crazy, you're not sure how much more of the feeling paired with his moans you can take before you explode.

"matt oh fuck, oh my god, mhmm," you shout when he hits a specific spot that drives you absolutely crazy and also makes him whine.

"i fuck the most beautiful sounds out of you, don't i?" matt rams into you as he speaks and proves his own point as a groan falls from your lips, your heavy panting audible alongside the slapping of skin against skin.

"i asked you a fucking question y/n," matt reinforces, his slap more rough due to the lack of an answer but it just turns you on more.

"yes, yes, only you," you groan, your hands clutching anything you can find, trying your best to not cum because you've been told to hold it but it's only becoming significantly harder by the second.

"such a good girl for me y/n. never knew my best friend was such a dirty slut," he murmurs as his hands move to either side of your waist and pull you onto him further, the friction driving you insane in the best way possible.

"fuck matt, you feel so good," you breathe out a response as another slap hits you, this one closer to your centre and making you practically scream.

"so fucking loud baby," he whispers and his tone sends you spiralling and makes you want to cum even more, the tension building up unexplainably.

his words leave ghostly touches against your ear and his hot breath fans the side of your cheek. he nibbles at the side of your neck and places rough kisses all over the skin before he turns your face via your jaw and kisses you so passionately. you groan as his tongue slides into your mouth and he tugs at your bottom lip with his teeth.

"matt, please," you hum into his mouth as he increases his pace so that you're starting to see stars, unable to focus on anything other than the two of you and how fucking good you feel.

"come on y/n, beg for what you want," matt is clouded with arousal and he grins as he tugs your hair, he adores the way you fall back into him at his control.

"let me cum please matt, i've been so good. you make me feel so fucking good- oh fuck please," you do beg and it's ringing in matt's ear and he chuckles lowly.

"yeah? you wanna cum slut?" he grunts, clutching your hair in his fist and pulling it firmly as he fucks into you.

"please matt, you fuck me so well. please let me cum," you continue and he smirks at the sound of your desperate voice.

"tell me y/n, how long have you wanted this?" he asks you and you can't even answer properly when he's showing you no mercy.

"s-so- fuck- so long " you can barely say a word and a loud slap sounds in the room, making you buzz in contentment.

"again," you start to whine and he breathes out a laugh, slapping your ass again and listening to your happy cries.

you grind back onto him, meeting him halfway, and he makes the most sensational noise of pleasure at the contact, "do that again baby."

and you do it again just as he wishes, moving your hips so they dance on his lap and he whimpers so delicately, you forget how to breathe.

"keep doing that and i'll let you cum," he whispers with another slap and you move against him quickly, continuing to meet him halfway and panting at the rushed movements.

you need to cum so badly and the feeling of matt's fingers digging into your side is driving you over the edge beyond belief. you can feel the way matt's close to cumming yet again as well and when you grind into him to feel even more, he appears to lose all composure he's been maintaining and gives into your never ending begging.

"cum with me beautiful," matt allows and you release together, the way you have always wanted and the way you've had numerous dreams about. it's perfect and you can't complain in the slightest, even if your legs feel more sore than they ever have.

#matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo smut #yn #fem reader #matt x reader #matt sturniolo fanfic #matt sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo x reader #the sturniolos #the sturniolo triplets #smut #sturniolowhore