#i did mean to make another doodle or two for u.. thing is when i make a drawing for another person usually more ppl

[rogdona]

Could you draw the cinnamon ciblings? Again no pressure! I’ll keep making doodles for you but I don’t expect more drawings in return :)

HERE U GO🙌🙌🙌

#i did mean to make another doodle or two for u.. thing is when i make a drawing for another person usually more ppl #come and ask me for drawings so i end up drawing for other ppl the whole day.. i enjoy it!! but i do need to take breaks bc it does tire me #and sometimes i end up forgetting things if theyre not in my inbox for me to see.. they get buried in the notes yk. #i do not mean to ignore ppl but i do wanna draw for myself in between requests hope u undersatnd #art #my art #ask #fanart

[dragonjesterwrites]

hey dj!! if you find and time/motivation, would you write a sun x moon thing? i love em sm, and u write them rly well!! preferably a first kiss or confession or something if that’s okay! i’m a sucker for the getting together parts, and there’s not much when it comes to these two :(

again, if you’re not feeling it dw! but thanks anyway, love ya!! <3

Paris my beloved (platonic) 🫂 I'm sorry this took so long!! You get two stories, because I misread your ask originally (I'm illiterate) and wrote something cute but unrelated- then I fixed it and wrote a whole 'nother story! (I'll put the Ao3 links to both stories at the bottom)

Anyway, I hope you see them and enjoy 💛✨️

Circuit Board Sparks (+ Origami Kisses)

Word Count

Circuit Board Sparks: 5,759

Origami Kisses: 1,434

Pairing: Sun/Moon

Summary/Genre

Circuit Board Sparks (Angst, fluff, suspense): Fazbear Entertainment strictly prohibits their animatronics from forming romantic attachment. Thankfully, Fazbear Entertainment is stupid, and will do anything if it means saving money.

Origami Kisses (Fluff, minor suspense, a wee bit suggestive 😳): LGBTQ/worker's rights win! The robots are slacking off work to make out in the closet

~~~~~

Sun didn't know why he did these things to himself.

He held the pink, heart shaped card aloft, rubbing its glittery edge idly with one thumb and causing a small sprinkling of white and red sparkles to fall down on his faceplate.

But he didn't react, except with a simulated sigh, as he stared at the picture on the paper. A delightful little doodle of him and Moon, separate and standing on either side of Ava, one of their little regulars. Everyone was smiling and holding hands, and they were all standing on a grassy, flower-filled field, with blue skies made purple by the pink of the paper and scribbly, rosy-white clouds.

My dads and me, read the caption above- well, a few letters were backwards and the ‘a’ on the ‘and’ was missing, but Sun was accustomed to the wonky handwriting of toddlers and translated it with ease.

They weren't the girl's fathers, of course- that honor belonged to Ava's two lovely and hilarious mothers that she followed around like a little duckling, but during her time without them at the Daycare, she'd decided that she needed two fathers as well… preferably ones in a relationship like her mothers were. As many times as Sun and Moon had tried to gently dissuade her from referring to them as her married fathers- it wasn't allowed- they weren't allowed- she was resolute, and they'd taken to answering any suspicious probing from upper management with a shrug and a cheerful kids, am I right?

It was a little troublesome, sure. But they adored her anyway, and besides, they'd gotten good at being convincing.

If only Sun was as good at convincing himself. The truth was, he would give anything to be free from this wretched mall, and have kids of his own, and… and marry Moon. The thought made his processors stutter, his fingers twitching against the back of the card and triggering another tiny glitter shower.

He'd tried to bury his love deep. He'd almost tried to rid himself of it, make himself forget. Maybe he had- it's not like he'd remember. But if that were the case, it had come back, and with force. Sun would often lay awake on the rickety bed they'd constructed together and wonder if the squeezing hurt in his circuits was at all comparable to what the humans called heartache.

What he'd give to raise little ones with Moon. He'd be such a good father, Sun just knew it. They could have a big, big house somewhere, with a big ol’ bedroom filled with all the blankets and pillows Moon desired. A big kitchen too, Sun thought. He could make so many snacks for the kiddos! Like cookies, and brownies, and homemade candy… go upstairs, past all the pictures of them together, and walk into the room with a trayful of treats, only to find them all cuddled up and asleep. Sun could just see it. 

A storybook in Moon's gentle grasp, still open and drooping towards the plush carpet. His music box, chiming softly in the cozy dark of the room. String lights and nightlights casting rainbow reflections on the walls. And all their kids, snuggling up on Moon's chest where he cradled them, or nestled comfortably in his lap, or laying next to him on the massive, starry beanbag in the center of the room.

And Sun would set the cookies down as quietly as possible, and pad over to give each child and Moon a little kiss on the temple. He knew he'd linger on Moon, keeping his grin pressed softly against his love's faceplate for at least several seconds, before pulling away to fetch his charger. Sun would want to savor the contact, to make up for all the times he-

…to make up for all the times he couldn't. 

Like now.

The squeezing grew tighter.

Sun sighed again, though this time it was more of a strangled huff. He shook his head wordlessly, the heart beginning to tremble in his grasp.

With a flurry of clicks and whirs, he abruptly stood, and marched over to the arcade machine- behind it sat a small plastic chest Moon had pilfered from the old supplies that were to be thrown out. It had a crack in it that Sun had patched with outdated bandaids, hiding, for the most part, the contents inside.

He brought it out from its hiding place, opened it up, and placed the heart inside, along with all the other offered-up notes, doodles, and gifts from the kids that even remotely suggested he and Moon might be in a romantic relationship. The chest was getting a bit full, now… they'd need another soon.

Sun stared down at the heart for just a moment longer. It rested on top of the stack, the newest addition to the collection of something that never could be. Perhaps never would be, anyway- after all Sun's internal strife; his daily cursing out of the company, their backwards, restrictive policies, and their penchant for electric punishment- he had no idea if Moon even liked him back.

He dropped the lid, and it shut on the heart with a snap!

Once again, Sun decided as he dragged himself back to bed, he would bury his feelings. Everything hurt, the shocks would hurt more, and it was late. Flopping into the bed face-first did nothing to alleviate the pain, but Sun knew something that would. He reached out blindly for his charger, patting the blankets for it. There.

It slipped easily into his charging port, and he let himself relax into the bed with a series of discordant click-tick-clicks as the charger's influence began to take over him. As his programming slowed, the hurt ebbed away with everything else, until he was nothing more than simple code in a dreamless void.

~~~~~

Click. Click. Click.

Moon tapped the pen against his carved teeth, reading over what he'd wrote.

There were two things, actually- two letters, one to Sun and one to management. Moon sincerely doubted they'd listen, even though he made some very good points about the cost-effectiveness of his idea, but it was worth a shot. He'd never stop trying for this favor in particular.

A tiny bit of red glitter swirled down on to the letter, and he paused his tapping to watch it come to rest on the word separate.

Hmm. Moon set down the pen and reached up to his grin to scrape at it with his fingertip, only for more glitter to join their lost piece on the page. When Moon pulled his finger back, it, too, now sparkled with little bits of red and white, and Moon let out a fond hum, tilting his head at the sight.

“Up to some arts and crafts, were you, Sunny?” He asked the empty room. His voice echoed back at him, and he huffed quietly, looking down at his letter. With any luck, he'd soon never have to hear his own voice come back to him again. With any luck, their room would be filled with shared giggling, and teasing, and songs sung together after a long day's work.

The idea filled Moon with both an incredible softness and a deep, deep longing. It was dangerous to want like this, he knew that. Didn't stop him. As long as he wasn't open with it, they wouldn't punish him, or Sunny. As much as it killed Moon, he'd keep it in.

He could still be friendly with Sun, though. Management didn't order them to hate each other, just forbid them from expressing romantic feelings. So Moon got away with what he could, putting little blue hearts on his ‘i's (it wasn't like they were red, humanity's typical symbol of romantic love) asking Sun how his day was, and bringing him gifts he hoped he'd like from the lost and found.

He wasn't half as good at arts and crafts as Sun was, but he attempted that from time to time, too, sometimes spending hours cutting out paper dolls and doodling silly things to make him laugh. And if little heart sequins somehow found their way onto the paper and cardstock with the rest of the glitter, well, whoops. Total accident.

Moon lifted the letter to management and gave it a good shake, sending the red and white bits of glitter down onto the letter to Sun. Hm. Speaking of arts and crafts…

He left the letters on the floor and headed for the balcony. His cable came when called, clipping onto his back and allowing him to soar down to the supply closet.

He was back five minutes later, the supplies necessary bundled into his long arms. He set them down besides the letters, spread them out, and got to work. Moon was careful, each snip of the scissors and swipe of the glitter glue's brush deliberate and slow.

He was probably pushing it. If management found out, he was sure they'd have some questions. But after Moon finished up, and as he headed down to both return the supplies and drop off the letter to the Parts and Service supervisor's office, he thought of what he should say if questioned. By the time he was back at the Daycare and sitting in front of his finished piece, he decided he was content with his defense, and plugged in for the night with only a little bit of unrelated anxiety sparking in his circuits.

Sun's letter and Moon's gift sat by their bed, ready for Sun in the wee hours of the morning.

~~~~~

“Hey, Sunny.”

Sun couldn't help but wince, despite the little ones sitting beside him at the craft table. He knew that tone. The helper approaching him was friendly enough, but her tone was not one of camaraderie. 

“Why, hello, Julia! How are you this fine morning? Would you like to join us? We're making paper puppets!” Sun said, wiggling his fingers. A few of them fell off, and he let out a dramatic gasp, making the kids laugh.

If Julia picked up on how forced his cheer was, she didn't say anything. She did grimace a little, however. “Yes, but P and S want you. I can take over- I'll save you some supplies for when you come back.”

At once and in unison, the kids groaned, and Julia's eyes narrowed, ever so slightly, at Sun. Sun shrugged subtly back at her- he understood why she'd be suspicious. Honestly, training the kids to guilt trip the adults is exactly the sort of stunt he'd pull, but he was pretty sure it was just because he'd been even more active with them than usual. 

Throwing himself into his work was always a good distraction.

“Don't take Mister Sun away, Miss Julia!” One of the kids cried, pouting at her and throwing down their supplies. “We just got started!”

“Don't worry, kiddo. Mister Sun will be back before you know it! Well… by the end of the day at least.” 

Oh, no. End of the day? It was only eight in the morning!

Sun picked up the kid who'd cried- Percy- and held him up, to Percy's surprise. “Oh, can't it wait just a little longer, Ms. Julia? Just until Percy and I have finished our puppets!”

Julia's sympathetic twist of the mouth became a frown, and when she spoke she'd lowered her volume to a murmur. “Sun. C’mon, man. Don't do this.”

Sun met her stern and mildly disappointed gaze with an innocent blink, but then Percy began to squirm.

“Mister Sun, I can't finish my Monty puppet from up here.” Percy protested, kicking his legs a little.

Sun closed his eyes and sighed, setting the boy down. “No, I suppose you can't. Very sorry, Percy, go ahead and keep creating! I'll be back to see it before you have to go, okay?”

“Okay. I'll watch your stuff.” Percy said, pulling Sun's craft towards him. Sun had no doubt the little Moon puppet would vanish before he returned, but even in the midst of his anxious despair, he appreciated the thought.

“Aww, thank you Percy!” Sun stood and clapped his hands together, briefly catching the attention of the more focused toddlers. “I'll see the rest of you superstars in just a few hours, okay? Have fun, and be good for Ms. Julia!”

A chorus of okays and bye-byes was offered to him, and he returned each and every one as he swapped places with Julia.

It was only once the kids had returned their attention to the crafts, and he couldn't drag it out any longer, that he turned and let the cable take him to his room. The Parts and Service tech was waiting for him at the door, and they waved the keeper device over his upper right arm. It deactivated the boundary lock that kept him within the bounds of the Daycare and Theater, and simultaneously activated the tracker that the company could use to, well, track him and Moon down if they ever managed to escape.

It was a too-short walk down to Parts and Services. He fiddled with the heart locket Moon had made him, hidden safely from suspicious eyes in the deep pockets of his jester pants. It couldn’t ease his anxieties entirely- just having it on his person brought its own little pang of anxiety- but Sun was glad for it regardless. It was probably the closest he'd ever get to holding Moon's hand.

The tech escorting him hadn't told Sun anything about the apparently lengthy procedure planned, and Sun hadn't asked. He was just too nervous, he didn't want to know.

But as the tech opened the door for him, and Sun walked into the room to be greeted by at least a dozen techs turning their heads to stare at him, he really wished he had.

“Alright, let's do this.” Lance, the ever-blunt and irritable head of Parts and Service began giving orders, and the techs scrambled to obey. “Daycare Attendant, go ahead and get in the cylinder chair. Irene, Max, go in with him. Strap him down and turn him off, then get his measurements. Tyler, Muhammed, you're on cutting station, Flor and Charlie- wiring…”

Sun walked as slowly as he could without attracting attention for it, quiet but rapidly puzzling over all the information he was taking in as fast as possible. Too many techs- training? No, they're too quick- professional. Why bring in professionals? And why so many? Different stations; metal-cutting, wiring, endoskeleton-

Oh. Oh, no. They're not- surely they're not decommissioning us?

He squeezed the locket and chuckled as he got into the hard plastic chair, the sound high-pitched and nervous even to his own audio receptors. “You know, I forgot to ask- silly me, hah- what is all this fuss about, hm?”

“It's a surprise, if that makes you feel better.” Irene told him with a smile, Max nodding along as he tugged Sun's hand out of his pocket so he could wrap his wrist in the restraint.

Sun's voicebox crackled with a hummed laugh. His now empty hand flexed under the newly tightened restraint, before he dropped it so his fingers could tap out a shaky rhythm onto the chair rest. “Oh- no, that's quite terrifying, actually.”

The pair of techs laughed too- they must have thought he was joking. But before he could say more, Irene reached up to the back of his faceplate. “You'll be fine, big guy. Gonna turn you off now, alright?”

NO-!

Then he woke up. Woke- woke up! Oh, thank every star in the sky-

“Alllrighty, bud, up you get.” The tight pressure around his wrist released, and he turned his head to see Max and Irene, looking significantly more tired and dirty, their uniforms spattered and streaked with grease and machine oil. “Moon's turn.”

“Moon's turn?” Sun repeated. He looked down at himself and through his software, examining inside and out. Unlike the humans, he was clean- not just that, he was completely unchanged.

“Yeah, he- ah, right. We didn't tell you.” Max chuckled. He lifted his arm, pointing at the opposite side of the glass cylinder. “Look for yourself.”

Sun turned, and if he had had a jaw to drop-

Moon stood on the other side, staring at him through the glass. His eyes glowed blue, so brightly Sun was amazed he hadn't noticed the glow reflecting off of Max and Irene. They grew even brighter as Sun met his gaze, and Moon tipped his faceplate, wiggling his fingers at Sun in enthusiastic greeting.

Sun was out of the chair in a flash, vaulting over the armrest to press against the glass. “Moon. Moon! Moony, is that really you?”

The glass muffled Moon's response, and Sun flexed his fluttering rays at him in half confusion and half delight, but then Moon stepped closer and pressed his hand against the glass, too, so that only two inches of glass separated their palms. It's me. I'm here.

“Hey, Sun, you can talk to him for real if you use the door.” Irene's amused voice snapped him out of it, and he whipped his head around, first at her, then at the door.

“Then tell him to come in for us.” Max added.

“Yes- yes, of course!” Sun took one last look at Moon, and watched his eyes flash, his faceplate tipping to the side. A sense of playfulness gripped him, and he dropped to a crouch, preparing to dash out. Moon did the same, and Sun ripped his hand away, booking it for the doors.

He almost crashed into Moon, and reached out to catch him. Moon grabbed onto him in turn, large hands warming Sun's casings, and they both burst out giggling, clutching at each other, overwhelmed with joy.

“Hey! What did you do to them?” Lance called, exasperated. “Why are they acting high?”

“They're not high.” Erica- one of the techs that had been by Moon- laughed. “They've got the zoomies. It's like- two excitable dogs meeting each other for the first time.”

“Well, you can throw them a ball later. We've got work to do.” Lance said firmly. “Daycare Attendant Moon, get in the cylinder.”

Moon's laughter died down, and he glanced first at Lance, then at the cylinder, eyeglow dimming significantly. “Right. Yes, sir.”

Moon's voice wasn't at all what Sun had expected, but Sun loved it regardless. It was soft, and raspy, and crackly, and it made its home in Sun's processors right away. But he pushed the rush of adoration aside for the moment, focusing instead on assuring his counterpart.

Sun squeezed his arms, prompting Moon to look at him. “Hey, Moony. I'll see you when you get out, and I'll be right here, waiting for you, okay? Not gonna move an inch, no sir!”

Moon eyes regained most of their original brightness, and Sun heard his fans whir a little faster. “Okay, Sunny. I'll see you soon.”

Sun barely resisted the urge to press his forehead against Moon's, instead squeezing him again before letting him go. It took the last remaining scrap of his self-control to do so, and he watched him go, eyes never leaving him for a second.

He didn't have to wait long to touch him again, thankfully. The techs were just finishing up, running tests on them both to make sure Moon worked right and Sun still worked right after the techs had gone poking about his gears and wires, moving things aside so they could compare their bodies as they built Moon's.

Sun told them he'd never felt better, but they still insisted on running the tests on him too, which he put up with only after another brush against Moon as he passed him back into the cylinder, the contact making his wires buzz.

And then, once the restraints had come off again, he jumped out and all but ran to Moon, who beamed at him before turning away. Sun followed his gaze, landing on Lance standing nearby, frowning down at a clipboard as he flipped through its pages.

“Okay, you're good. Get out of here.” Lance ordered, after just a minute more.

Moon whipped back, faceplate spinning in delight, and grabbed Sun's hand. Sun had barely a second to register the feeling of Moon's hand slipping into his and holding him tightly before Moon was pulling him down the hall and towards the double doors.

It only took, oh, about ten seconds for his processors to catch up, but when he did he let out a joyous laugh to match Moon's adorable giggles, and put on a burst of speed, which Moon was happy to match.

They ran all the way to the Daycare, and it was only once they reached it did they slow to a stop.

“Oh, goodness.” Sun peered through the netting, letting his gaze sweep the empty, clean Daycare. “I- or, well, we, I mean- must have been gone the whole day!”

“They did a good job of cleaning up without us.” Moon said. Sun felt his rays flutter just hearing Moon speak, and he turned to him right as Moon did the same, his eyes brightening again. “I guess that means we get to spend time together.” 

Spend time together. His words, and the sweet, tender way he said it made Sun feel all fuzzy and gooey and warm inside.

He chuckled, his rays fluttering again. They might not have stopped, actually. Is this what being drunk felt like? “O-okay.”

His processors caught up a second later, and if he wasn't holding Moon's hand, he'd have slapped himself. Sun, you fool! Say something else! You're programmed with over 170,000 words, surely you can come up with something more eloquent!

His voicebox only stuttered once before he managed to get it working. “I would love to spend time with you, Moony.” 

Moon's eyes brightened, and he stepped closer, so close Sun could feel the heat his fans were pushing off him. Moon reached up, his hand making gentle contact with Sun's cheek, and Sun melted further, letting his faceplate roll into the touch. Oh, if only Moon knew the effect he had on him.

A little bit of doubt crept into Sun's mind- what if Moon was just being friendly? What if the barely-held-back need to grab him and kiss him silly- as best he could with his immovable grin- was all his own?

But Moon chased away Sun's worries with little brushes of his thumb over Sun's cheek, and Sun reached subconsciously up to hold Moon's wrist, fingers sliding between the bells and making them ring quietly. Moon leaned in even closer, eyes dimming into something soft. “Hey, Sunny?”

“Yeah, Moony?” Sun breathed.

Moon's voicebox buzzed almost inaudibly with the beginning of a sentence, and then his eyes flickered brighter, and- Sun thought- moved briefly to the side, but he wasn't sure. Moon tore away and spun with a clean pirouette, leaving Sun stunned and only able to watch as Moon then pranced over to the slide.

“Race you to our room.” Moon taunted, before grabbing the top of the Slide Into Fun! sign, picking his legs up, and launching himself down like a blue and white torpedo. “Last one there is a rotten egg!”

For a moment, all Sun could do was stand there and listen to Moon's cackles echo up the slide, hand still hovering in the air where he'd been holding him. He took in a deep artificial breath, then glanced to the side. Doors. Right.

His heart wasn't really in it, but he still vaulted over the railing with ease and speed, then booked it down the stairs three at a time. Moon crashed audibly into the ball pit by the time Sun reached the doors, which were pushed easily open and then kicked shut behind him.

Moon was wading noisily through the pit, and Sun caught his eyes flash as they locked gazes. Sun called for the cable, but Moon was faster and closer. It dropped from the ceiling, clipping onto Moon's back and pulling him up and out. “Ooh, too slow!” Moon teased, and despite the worry and emotional stranglehold on his circuits, Sun still huffed, amused by his counterpart's antics.

The cable dropped Moon off on the balcony, and Moon took one last lingering look at Sun over his shoulder before disappearing between the curtains.

The cable came for Sun next, having logged his ping. It clipped securely behind him, and brought Sun soaring up to the balcony next. He listened for Moon as it detached, noting the sound of his machinery heading further away- he was probably heading into the second room via the tunnel.

The carabiner released fully, and Sun pushed through the curtains, looking around the room before heading down the short steps. “So!” He called, trying to keep the disappointment out of his voice. “What do you want to do first? We could do arts and crafts- that's what I was doing with the kids before I was called to Parts and Service.”

Sun reached the lip of the plastic blue tunnel that connected the rooms, and began to crawl through. “Ooh, we could also build a pillow fort! Or play cards, or read together.” He got out, standing and brushing himself off before continuing. Odd, but he couldn’t see Moon anywhere.

“We could also play one of our board games! I just found a game called Battleship collecting dust in the supply closet-”

“Actually, Sunny... I had something a little different in mind.”

He barely had time to turn around before Moon was stepping into view and into Sun's personal space again, both hands taking his faceplate. “Wh-”

Moon closed the distance and kissed him, hands coming around the sides of Sun's faceplate to weave through his wires. Sparking electricity shot through Sun's circuits, his whole body suddenly buzzing with warmth. The same joyous delight from before gripped him, but this time it was so strong he locked up, unable to move.

Moon broke away several seconds later with a quiet pant, like he'd actually run out of air kissing Sun. “Sun, I… Sunny? Are you okay?”

Sun meant to say something along the lines of yesI’mokaypleasepleasekissmeagain, but sadly, the only thing that came out of his voicebox was a lame wheeze, and Moon's eyes grew bright and wide with what Sun presumed was alarm.

“I- I'm sorry, I should have asked.” Moon stammered, pulling his hands quickly away. “I just- are you- do you- are you alright?”

YesI’mfineI’mfinekissmeagainpleasepleaseplease-

Sun tried again to speak, but this time instead of a wheeze, his voicebox produced only a static crackle. Hmmmm… alright, maybe I'm… not fine.

Moon hesitated only a moment longer before grabbing Sun's hand and tugging him over to the bed, pressing on his shoulders to get him to sit. Sun's concern for himself all but vanished with each touch of Moon's hands on his body, and was completely forgotten when Moon's trembling fingers tangled through his head wires again.

“Stars, what have I done?” Moon muttered as he poked around. “Moon, you idiot. Kiss him without asking, break his voicebox.” He raised his voice a little from its low growl, becoming something softer and apologetic. “Sun, I'm sorry- I can fix it. T-the second thing, at least.”

Sun tried to respond, but still nothing. Then there was a click! in the back of his head, as much a sensation as it was a noise, and his voicebox beeped in his chest. Reset.

Moon scooched quickly back, the blankets rustling as he moved. Sun turned to look, watching as Moon began to fiddle with a section of one. “Are you okay? Does it work?”

“Mmhmm. It works.” Sun confirmed.

Moon sighed in relief, joints clicking as he deflated. “I'm glad. And I'm sorry again, truly, I just- I was so excited, and I really like you-”

Sun got up, and all but tackled Moon back down, wrapping himself around the other animatronic. Moon let out a surprised grunt, bouncing on the bed a little and blinking up at Sun with bright blue eyes as Sun began to ramble.

“Oh, Moony, I like you too! I was so worried you wouldn't, I was so excited to finally hear you and see you and touch you and kiss you but I didn't know if you liked me back, and I didn't want to scare you off, and-”

A giggle, soft and crackly but growing louder, caught Sun's attention, and he faltered, peering down at Moon beneath him. The lunar animatronic reached up for him, eyes bright and frame trembling with mirth. One shaky hand caressed Sun's cheek, ghosting over the rounded silicone. “I'm sorry, I just… I love you so much.”

Sun's processors came to an abrupt halt, clearing any other thought but that one out of his mind. “You… you love me? You really love me?”

Moon took a proper hold of Sun's cheek, cupping his face in his hand while his eyeglow softened, along with his voice. “I do. I love you a lot. More than words can say. I- ooh-”

Sun dropped, smashing their grins together in an overjoyed kiss. He wrapped his arms around Moon, holding him tight, as tight as he possibly could without crushing him, and his circuits sparked when Moon returned both the kiss and the embrace, pressing his grin back into Sun's and laying his hands on his back.

It was Sun who broke the kiss, though it was only so he could press kisses onto every other inch of Moon with a pronounced mwah! between declarations of love. “I love you! I love you so, so much and you have no idea how long I've wanted to say that- well, okay, maybe you do, but- I'm just so so so excited to say it, I want to say it forever, and hug you, and kiss you, and hold you forever and ever-”

Moon, for his part, was reduced to a flustered mess, giggling like mad and barely able to reach up and pull his hat over his face- but with each delighted spin of his faceplate, he had to let go of the brim of his nightcap, and Sun could see just how brightly those beautiful eyes glowed.

Moon's laughter made Sun giggly too, and it wasn't long before the dizzying euphoria stripped him of words, and he ran out of untouched casing to nuzzle and kiss. He kissed him all over a second time anyway, just to make sure Moon knew how cherished he was, but eventually collapsed on top of him, panting between pleased chuckles and little extra nuzzles against Moon's chest.

Their laughter exhausted itself eventually, and they settled into each other's embrace in the cozy, afterhours quiet of their room, holding each other as close as possible and purring just loud enough for the other to hear. After a few minutes, Moon shifted ever so gently, and Sun moved his faceplate to look up over at him, rays fluttering.

“I love you too, Sunny.” Moon's voice was thick with affection, and he nuzzled against the top of Sun's faceplate, eliciting a louder more rumbling purr from the solar animatronic. But then Moon sighed and averted his gaze, eyeglow dimming, and Sun searched his face with increased attention, worried. 

Was… was I too much? He wondered, but then Moon continued. “...We'll have to hide it, of course, but-”

Oh.

“No.” Sun shook his head, rays pulsing. “No, we're getting out of here.”

Moon's eyes brightened, then dimmed again, just as quickly as they'd lit up. “How?”

“I don't know.” Sun replied. “But we are. I absolutely refuse to live in a place that won't even let me hold hands with the love of my life. I mean, it's ridiculous!”

Seized by indignation, he sat up, and Moon let him go, watching him with brightened eyes as Sun stood and began to pace up and down the dusty floorboards. “Can't put ideas into the kids heads,’ they say. As if there aren't plenty of kiddos with gay parents already! No, no, it's not that. They know if we fall in love, we won't stand for seeing our partners suffer at their hands. We're used to getting hurt ourselves, but seeing each other receive the same treatment?”

He growled, shaking his head to clear the image of Moon writhing in pain. “I'd- oohoohoo, I'd do something I might regret, that's for sure.”

“Sunny.” Moon's soft call of his name made Sun falter, and he turned to look at Moon. The sight of him laying there in their bed, head propped up in his hand as he watched Sun with those beautiful eyes of his made Sun turn to absolute mush, anger fading and guilt taking its place.

“I'm sorry.” Sun said, making his way back over to the bed. Moon scooched back and opened up his arms in invitation, and Sun gladly accepted his embrace, laying down on his side, facing Moon. With the hand not settling on Sun's waist, Moon brushed his knuckles against Sun's cheek, and Sun sighed, closing his eyes. “It's just… I love you, and I hate them, and I couldn't stand to see you hurt. The very thought makes me furious.”

“It's alright.” Moon murmured. His voice was so kind, so gentle even underneath the static crackling, and Sun felt more of his anxieties fade. “I love you, too, and for what it's worth, Sunny... I share your sentiment.”

The kindness had dissolved in those last words, replaced by an underlying growl, and they were punctuated too with a squeeze around Sun's middle. But then Moon huffed, and when he spoke again, he just sounded a little bit tired. “But yes… we will escape. We'll have to bring the others with us, it would hardly be fair to leave them behind… but once all is said and done, we can enjoy our freedom. Maybe find a nice big house out in the middle of nowhere to make our own.”

Sun could feel his casings grow warmer, despite the efforts of his fans. “Aww. I had the same idea.”

Moon chuckled. “Great minds think alike.” He pulled Sun closer, and Sun obliged him, snuggling up. “We can make plans later, though. For now, how about we just enjoy each other's company? All the humans have gone home, and there are no cameras in here. We're safe, Sunny, and we're together.”

“Yes. That does sound nice.” Sun whispered, and Moon lowered his hand, then leaned forward to gently press the top of his head to Sun's. 

“I love you, Sunny.”

“I love you too, Moony.”

~~~~~

Ao3 Link to Circuit Board Sparks

Ao3 Link to Origami Kisses

#sun x moon #sun x moon fnaf #celestial boyfriends #sun fnaf #moon fnaf #not sywsar related

[safyresky]

Sorry for the late hour but here are some questions! For the ask thing!

I could've literally asked for all the questions to be answered but here's just a few. Please and thank u

54 / 40 (for no reason at all 🤫)/ 39 / 16

I am a cretura of the night, Andie! No worries about the late hour EVER lol ;)

40. If someone were to make fanart of your work, what fic or scene would you hope to see?

Oh I like this one! Let me think! Hmm! You know what's fun? Bullet points! And readmores which I will do. uh. now

Cold front hugs! Specifically the mindscape one in Chapter 6, and the pair of them leaning on one another on the way out of the pond @ the Springs in Chapter 23 of CS! Which yes, isn't a hug, but is a cute Cold Front moment

Winter grabbing Blaise's lapels in Chapter 11 while he has a whole ass crisis >:)

The fucking. (breaks window) Blinter: were those our kids? Jack: SCATTER scene lmaooooooo (from Chapter 22 of CS)

The twins doing one of these (see photo below) on the backyard deck stairs before asking Summer to play fire tag with them

^like that, but like. on all fours. with Fino squashing Fiera lmao

Honestly there's so many scenes I'd love to get fanart of/draw/EXPERIENCE but those are the ones that pop into the head IMMEDIATELY! And that's just CS, AH!. The family photo from Jacqueline Dies pt2 would ALSO be a lovely fanart to see! I actually did a shit doodle of it last week just for funsies:

My god it's so LONG. Sorry about that! anyway!

54. What’s your favourite part about the fanfiction writing process? Shoving an OC or two or five into the story and see how it goes >:). that and uploading a draft and reading it through one last time. That's exciting! I love that part! It's time consuming but I LOVE IT. It's like. THE ANTICIPATION

39. Share a snippet from a WIP

I should like. Assign these wips to numbers and start rolling dice about it. Um. OKAY! From smile shot wip "Believing is Seeing"

“Is it Grapes of Wrath?” “Yes! It actually was! Nice guess, Dite.” Dite and Xander lay on his dream cloud, just behind the chimney of Danielle’s house. Jacqueline snoozed still, curled up on Dite’s thigh. The goddess had lain back; her arms were behind her head as she gazed up at the sky, watching the clouds drift by. On the other side of the cloud, Xander lay on his back as well, one leg dangling, the other one bent at the knee as he read a book. “Alright, I got one. Two exes meet up again after a few years; shenanigans ensue, they still both have it bad for each other. Best slow burn I have ever read.” “Persuasion?” “Awh, you got it on the first go!” Xander laughed. “It’s supposed to be a misleading summary, Dite.” “I just really love Persuasion. It’s one of my favourite books! When Wentworth writes that letter? I just. Ugh,” Dite finished with a happy sigh. “It’s good.” There was a grumble between the two Legates; Dite perked up, sitting up gently. “Hi sleepy head,” she said with a grin. Jacqueline sat up, scrunching up her nose. “That was not four hours.” “Almost twelve, actually,” Xander said. “Dream sand may have had a hand in it.” Jacqueline scratched her neck and stretched her shoulders, shaking her freshly thawed hair off her face. “I didn’t melt all over you, did I?” “You did, but I don’t mind! It was just a little damp, no biggie.” “What’s the status?” “Quiet day,” Xander said, flipping his page. “They’ve stayed in for the most part. Left for errands a while ago, not back yet. Danielle’s still feeling hopeful, though.” “And she’s been meaning to text Charlie all day!” Dite said, chipper. “Can we get closer?” Jacqueline asked. “Why’d we move from the window?” “She ran to it right when she woke up and we were almost caught,” Xander said, flipping another page. “You snore.” “The fuck I do.” “You do,” Dite said. “But it’s cute snores! Like um, like every third breath is a snore.” “A honk sho or a mimimi?” “A weird cross between both.” Jacqueline looked thoughtful, then shrugged. “I can vibe with that. Side note, love that we can swear right now. Feels good, feels wholesome,” she said, hopping off of the cloud and onto the roof. “What are you doing?” Xander asked, putting down his book. “Getting closer! This one’s her room?” Xander nodded. “Quiet, though!” “I thought nobody was home?” “Her sister is.” “Alright, I can be quiet,” Jacqueline said, and, with a little hop, disappeared into thin air. “What is she doing?” Xander asked, trying to find her magical aura. Dite peered over the cloud with Xander. She surveyed the roof, then swatted Xander gently. “Right there, look; fast moving trail of frost headed down the drain pipe. She’s being sneaky,” Dite said with a grin. Xander chuckled. “Nice.” In the distance, car doors slammed and chatter met their ears. Danielle and her Mom had gotten back from their errands and were chatting up a storm. “Things are picking up again!” Dite said with an excited squeal. “We’re almost there, Xander!”

The summary of this one: Charlie tells Danielle about what his Dad REALLY does. Trouble in paradise has Dite on ALERT; determined, she hatches a lil plot and drags Jacqueline and Xander along for the ride. It's been fun to write! This trio of Legates is my fave lmao. They get into situations, and it's tripled when Charlie hangs with them!

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

Honestly? Too many! If I had to count, excluding wips, it'd be uh....eight, I think 🤔🤔🤔

My favourite one right now is Diteline Valentine's Day featuring Diteline kiddos! Dite's working and Jacqueline gets the day off. There is a cuddle puddle after Dite leaves for work. The kids ask Jacquie about what Diteline used to do on VDays before kids. Jacquie tells them all about their romance and such and says that every day is VDay with the four of them for her! They decide they wanna do something nice for their moms despite Jacquie's reassurance. Shenanigans ensue!!! Robyn wears a blanket cloak! Eira/Bianca didn't sleep! Joy has been awake for hours bc Valentine's Day! It's a recipe for disaster!

thanks for sending these in 🥰🥰🥰

#dani answers #alpharra #long post #crystal springs #cs snips and wips #dani doodles #really really drafty doodles lmao #my god i have so many art ideas and talent the size of my pinkie lmao #BUT WE WILL GET THERE! HELL YEAH! #Thanks again andie! #ask box shenanigans

[berlinbisque]

Proud Reject (Part 1)

I’m literally blind my eyesight has deteriorated further everything’s blurry the day starts in bed & ends like that too no sunlight no connection with the outside world no one to talk to just my phone and my thoughts & loads of tears… that’s how everyday begins and ends. Its not self imposed, this happens when you are isolated by people. I can’t type but I wanted to write this… I love this mini story or script more than my next book even though the book’s more interesting but out of personal choice I like the story which I’ll be sharing tomorrow more than that, it’s not on any professional level it’s just something I would’ve discussed with a friend and laughed ie. if I had friends, something started that particular “topic” and I couldn’t help wondering… what if?

My heart was in my mouth again cuz I received a reel on FB which had his friend Aditya (he was either pretending to be him in 2016 or he himself inspite of being engaged was interested idk) they were dancing like most tv ppl and I got another panic attack… my mother was already torturing me, I woke up with high fever I still have fever headache it’s been there since a week I’m getting wheezing due to continuous crying and I realised that he wants someone famous to make such videos too. Someone rich and famous like that. Even in abroad there’s no pressure, over there all those celebs (who are are much more popular) even the ones in their early 20s when they make videos that too just one or two out of fad, they film it on their cheap phones they don’t care about the blurry quality they are not trying to sell it, they just don’t care about all that and those who are of my age (still nowhere close to Aditya, he was older than Harsh also) some of them, even if they have all those pics that I personally like (with their boyfriends - trekking or at the lake, casual everyday candid shots) they still find it hard to cope with social media and they eventually take a break from it, had they been in my position they too would’ve ended up like this out of all that pressure. I can’t keep up with your life. Few things that I’ll like to share before starting with my story, A - the sketches I’m sorry if he was hurt. I had not made them, my book wasn’t like Rupi Kaur’s either it never had those intimate doodles. I think my mother stalks me (I don’t want to write about her publicly but I have to share all this please don’t judge me by her) and she has taken advantage of a lot of things and also challengingly said “Did anyone come to help you? Everyone hates you and no one pays attention no one cares, everyone wants you to die and you will die alone like this” she has also told me a lot of hurtful things related to that guy, taking advantage of that as well and and the problem is (my hands are cold n numb lifeless rn) I can’t convey my feelings directly through some app or something so I have to rely on these public posts NO MAILS he ain’t some God or Celebrity (being a celebrity means being celebrated not deprecated) I’m not some groupie or teenager to mail my fav celebrity crush and he doesn’t belong to any boy band. What’s in it for me? Will I be rescued from my mother or helped with my health issues which started DUE TO HIM? Or is he just gonna sit there reading my mail, getting happy with all the validation after which he’ll ignore it. Am I that? Hahaha I’m not into human worship. We are more focused on our lives… especially those like me in my position. She has told me several times that I’m a “sl-u-tt” for being in LOVE or for falling in love. She also came up with the forcer tag even thought it was torturous for me and I kept crying and saying STOP stop stop cuz for us as girls rape or force is worse than murder, I never wanted him to marry me just to take responsibility for his actions I never wanted to punish him with myself and I always respected him and I’ll continue to do so I’m not his fans to write cheap comments like I saw in that dancing video (they were writing about his shirt). That tacky shirt made the whole video even more disturbing, and I didn’t see the entire thing I was in the middle of a panic attack, I just saw one shot then I died. After that I vomited, my pressure was falling rapidly and I kept crying for days cuz you know what right… (25th Oct) anyway I never shared this (one more reason/aspect) like that Chote Pandit tells Ruhaan or Ruh Baba “Aap par aise chichore kapde jajte nahi hai” I was like aah that is what they call it… anyway haha but I don’t want anyone who is being an “eye candy” for other females on television, they come and hit on him in comments that too cheap comments. Yes everyone’s doing it but that’s why we are so depressed and you are anyway not with me I don’t even get a fraction of your day or time.

My mother used that word force several times (she has said other unimaginable offending things too) cuz I was crying and it was triggering me, she said it because I wanted him to say something (but we weren’t even discussing that) for talking or communication cuz I just wanted his OCD to break. It started within 24 hours and not how you might think we met on 2nd Oct then 2 years later 2nd April and I know that we all feel jaded to text sometimes or keep the conversation going, we might not feel enthusiastic anymore after that initial excitement or whatever but it wasn’t like that, if it would’ve been that I wouldn’t have even taken so much stress. We’ve all done that at some point in our lives, internet makes us lethargic, we also get addicted to more exploration or finding new people to talk to… we feel like we can do better or take our time to choose whoever’s the most ideal for us, but his case was totally different.

At some point we would all respond or say something maybe after a week or even after getting let’s say - reconnected after losing contact or reaching a temporary impasse. We wouldn’t hold on to any grudge or some kind of a “promise” he swore never to talk to me, there was nothing to be mad about, he just decided that we will never have any direct contact his parents also said “We don’t want to keep any talukaat (contact) particularly with your daughter” he kept liking my pics BUT not replying to any of the texts (when he started liking my photos religiously I texted him on FB messenger because I thought maybe my texts weren’t getting through and I wasn’t receiving his due to some glitch but he READ those FB texts and still didn’t respond) and even after that he was liking the pics then when I told him “Are u feeling sorry for me, why do you keep liking the photos, is it the BB pin what you wanted, I even gave you a reason that too it was all funny and I gave it the very same night as soon as I woke up in the middle of it I gave it” he removed me from the list after that. I am getting wheezing I can’t get overwhelmed I had shared the exact thing which I told him when he was asking for my pin (long ago) I can’t keep reiterating everything everywhere. He then kept blocking and ignoring my real account but speaking to the fake ID

The coincidences and those premonitions in my dreams had already started which made me more curious about his behaviour so I tried talking to him but that fake ID like I said was for my school friend who was also stalking me with her fake ID. And I would not see his stories or anything, I was playing her Snapchat story but his was queued so it started playing by default where I saw that training session. When I tried speaking to him using my real acc… he not only blocked me AS SOON AS HE HEARD MY NAME (like I said he wanted no “direct” contact between me and him) he also made his account private. He made me feel like a stalker, I had already started getting panic attacks and I had stopped watching TV it has been off since then (2015 Sept) I tried moving on in Aug itself but I told you what happened over and over again, same old story repeated heartbreaks… cuz they only wanted girls like me as a call girl and according to them only pageant winners or models, fair and rich or extremely famous girls even those with notoriety (nothing worth all that attention) who were out of their league were all meant for dating. I never fell in that category. Eventually they ended up with actual call girls. I have seen their pics and I’ve seen some in real life too. All those other girls whom they were chasing would treat them like “fans” karma. Not only actors everyone these days does that and then girls of my level (caliber) get married to roadside romeos and illiterate creeps/pervs cuz all those men also want someone out of their league and they prey on us… this is a common problem in India. Anyway like I said I just wanted to see if he still remembered me by the end of that year and if he still hated me (for no reason) I had not added him to view his stories but he blocked me and made everything private. I’m twitching it affects me subconsciously now… my mother also makes me feel like this after years of (weird) coincidences which were linked to him and all that insensitivity (the story escalated he never made peace his behaviour only got worse along with all that humiliating ignorance) since she called me a “sl-tt” for falling in love with him I eventually ended up telling her that her marriage was literally arranged it wasn’t a love marriage but yet she got prégnant so many times so was that out of love or lust? I never wanted to get on such terms with her but she would keep torturing me (she had thrashed me ruthlessly even after getting fibromyalgia several times cuz I have no one in this world to support me or tell her anything) she has in fact told me a lot of harmful and offending things (out of gloating) “Dekho kuch aur kabhi koi nahi mila iss aurat ko yeh akeli hi reh gayi” and laughed (I was 25) I’ve been getting addressed as aurat or woman ever since I was 12. I was told I should’ve drowned during 26th July floods and never returned from school I would sit on the stairs with my heavy bag famished and parched everyday after coming home for 2-3 hours cuz my mother would not leave keys for me, and then get tortured at home for another one hour, I would keep telling myself one day someone will come and all this would end but I ended up being bed ridden because of whoever came and it continued for many more years to come, all my youth and adulthood.

I was never a likeable girl whom you could fall in love with, I never had those superficial attributes (white complexion, money, fame etc. they would only try to treat us like call girls that’s why I’m a lip virgin) . When I said about love and arranged marriages she said she had every right cuz she was legally married and I’m a forcer rapist (for wanting to know the reason behind his sudden silence and that absurd behaviour) she keeps saying or blurting these things out because of unrequited love cuz no one likes or wants me, it’s perceived as a social stigma in India. Cuz there’s nothing from the opposite side not even care or basic concern as a Co-human literally how can someone be so insensitive? She says all that derisively, again out of gloating and competition just to pull me down as another female. Today things were worse even though I had wheezing and I’m still getting it + fever and headache. I’m gonna cut it short now I’ve written a lot…

So coming back to the OCD or whatever part where he had made a rule that there would be no direct contact - he would either speak to my fake ID or use his own friend’s ID but one of us had to be someone else. Go through this link: https://www.lilacnights.com/post/surprise The other day I murmuring in my sleep I was so disoriented I kept saying “Aditya came with his gf Aditi… God knows for what, Harsh was also 10 kms away Aditya had said he would go to some bakery in Kandivali for evening snacks Kandivali is where they would reside he was at his house even though he would always be 6 kms away which is Malad” then I said to myself “No wake up it’s Tanvi not Aditi obviously”

I had told you, the Devil or angels all these entities in fact can probably read our minds and you know when I was browsing certain quotes it’s as if they were talking to me… one of them reflected exactly what I was thinking a few days back - Since I had seen his house in 2015-16 I knew he wasn’t rich and like I said he wasn’t even that big on Instagram or FB no blue tick and 2500-3000 followers with 250 likes, from his (natural) pics I thought he wasn’t that good looking or fair (it’s just that he wasn’t very photogenic) and so I fell in love with him but then some tarot reader told me (I had to rely on all that cuz he was not saying anything) that he was reluctant cuz he thought I was like a gold digger so I started cutting down all my expenses worked on several articles for my blogs back then, I was 20 but I was trying to be as understanding as possible… I started buying things on Sale literally if you’ve noticed for 100s-1000 all these years because of my panic attacks I never saw him after 2016 Feb and I thought maybe that is what he wanted there was anyway no hope from the others, and I had coincidences or signs here so I thought I’ll do this and then I realised it was all futile, all the selflessness and altruism it just wasn’t worth it. I even wrote a letter and clarified/acknowledged that it could be one sided while also sharing my feelings for him cuz I thought he would also cut down on his expenses because his brother was jobless like mine. That’s why I hate today’s generation they ruin everyone’s life along with their’s but I’m from Gen Z I’m actually younger than his younger brother it’s just that they are always like that, they have no pressure or expectations. I poured lots of love in that letter for this part but he hated me and then he had that stage show with her which broke my heart and I never gave it and my mother also was about to hit me again cuz she secretly read that (it had nothing which could’ve made her that livid or furious not even like a proper I love you or anything) she just said “Stop trying to look great or good” I saw the Devil’s numbers so I’m guessing it was him you had read my mind when I was telling myself that it was all wrong, I shouldn’t have ever tried being ideal for someone like that when he was already well off or rich or good looking he never needed love like me that’s why he never even understood anything, I don’t know why his house looked like that or if like ppl say Gujjus actually hide money but it was all deceptive, he was already too good he never needed love he was in a way better position. I kept saying I should’ve enjoyed and loved my life instead of getting bed ridden and cutting down everything, living on that bare minimum stuff c’mon… he showed a quote which had the exact same emotions and it was talking about all this too.

Then there were more quotes again with my thoughts but with answers this time - As a piece of advice *clears throat* the Devil’s like “Times change, we change, our choices change too… maybe you should just live out your dreams now” the background images everything all the signs suggested/reminded me of the rest of the stuff, let’s say he wants some tv actress to make those stupid immature dance reels (remember what had happened last time right? Two of them in their 40s made a misogynistic video where he was liye talk throwing her around and getting abusive and for some reason that was supposed to be funny and then that guy that “actor” he actually slammed her head against the wall in real life cuz he was having an affair) the fortune telling app said he wants someone “talented” to make those reels and earn money ummm seriously? You are going to hold auditions and another Swayamvar for this? You actually need talent for such stupid ass videos? Really? 😂🤣🤣🤣 He reminded me of my dreams (ironically the Devil not him) and he’s right here so if he is “rejecting” me for these reels like overage teenagers then even I will say - I want some NRI who stays abroad and who will take me away from all this (I gave examples of so many famous celebrities from MY age group all these ppl making videos are older, those celebs they don’t do all this and even if they do it cuz it’s a fad now it’s shot on blurry pixelated quality for fun not money and some of them they take all those cute casual pics and use Instagram like a digital album like some of our Indian Bollywood celebs and that’s it, they don’t turn this into a career that too most of it is just for attention) so yeah he’s right if he’s rejecting me for that especially after I’ve become conscious I don’t even look good so yeah I’m not suitable for the camera I have become agoraphobic I haven’t left my room since 2017 I’ve become bed ridden and he is still thinking selfishly about his own life then I also want a rescuer an actual hero who will take me abroad because why is he even staying India? Just got fame right? You hardly get anything here, we needed something for our living room and bathroom some important fixtures and even there there’s literally no choice or even proper functionality. If you see the state of our roads or the air quality outside you’ll literally feel like shifting there… it’s getting worse day by day, we hardly get any quality product here, prices are getting hiked and unlike abroad there are no alternatives, I keep getting cheap ads from “homegrown businesses” in India who are busy making Sx toys, the land of superficial Kama sutra and Chappis or pervs what else do you expect? Indians don’t need beautiful cosy homes or designer spaces (that too in a budget) or other things such as good quality food or air or any kind of consumption like that cuz they are only good at fcking and having kids. Our population shows that there are literally no brains here… my head is paining.

My mother would never believe or support me when I would say I’m always about to face molestation in the school bus cuz I’m my stop was last and I would be the only girl left everyday I would force myself to somehow keep away my head wud keep banging against the window cuz I would get drowsy, they (driver and cleaner) didn’t even spare a KG toddler, I eventually took things into my own hand and the cleaner’s frustration was evident that day and when I grew up I saw smother school bus’s driver ogling me (when I was a teenager) in my car, I immediately looked behind to see if they were being accompanied by a teacher cuz that was a new rule but the teacher was sitting obliviously completely ignorant to that in her own sweet world… (Jamnabai Bus) another toddler’s case came on tv that year where they parents had paid 10k for her picnic where she was raped and the teacher kept threatening and manipulating and raping her repeatedly he was a sad case my hands are again I’ve cold I had to mention all that this is one more reason why I don’t want kids anymore and this country it’s unlivable. I can’t stay here. All my school friends are married to NRIs, and I don’t want to stay here either… in fact considering my thoughts and everything I should’ve been the first to move. All my school friends would think I was from there… Someone had even told me that I was too sophisticated to be here when it saw my old website (I don’t have it now) he was surprised it was made in India. We asked about the bathroom hardware btw, I just received a response and as guessed they’ve shifted everything to exports inspite being an Indian brand, all the good stuff is reserved for Dubai and other places… people who don’t deserve to be there (cheap bimbos) have already shifted, for me I just fell short of the mark because of my looks ur complexion I don’t know what to blame. Look at these beautiful velvety chenille cushions with all those intricate designs (traditional + Aztec) I have studied all this on my own… you don’t get this stuff in India btw, we get nothing here.

I somehow got those items, it’s me Zara after all I can’t keep something ugly or bad in that bathroom, there has to be congruity like everything else I’m always in sync with the universe. We felt like thieves though to buy things made in Rajasthan as if it was all smuggled. In India girls develop a defence mechanism from an early age, it might sound like really dreary and lascivious if I’ll keep bringing up this topic but in this particular article I feel like I’ll have to discuss it not explicitly but I’ll have to make you understand why as girls or more precisely as ineligible (darker toned females who don’t have a rich father to buy a bridegroom for her, who won’t be able to afford any dowry you might think times have changed BUT I literally heard someone in my own family shouting and saying “My best friend’s girl has several hotels at her name her father is a business tycoon and look at me I can’t woo anyone like that, where am I? Uske gf ke baap ki itni saari hotelein hai dekho and wht about me?” He doesn’t even want to get married. That same gf was so weird she had a deviant personality she locked him from outside while they were on a trip God knows for what reason and kept him under lock and key. He woke up locked in that room.

We deal with lecherous men from the age of 10-11 and all these educated men who are supposed to take care of us are feeding us to the wolves I wanted someone of my caliber to talk to who would understand my thoughts, who would’ve able to keep up with me and my conversations someone who himself is fathomable and not some illiterate incoherent cheap vulgar man like that creep from Bhopal YET I WAS FORCED to talk to him, they left me with no choice until I blocked him and he kept coming and harassing me, he was a perv and you know his story. Is that not FORCE? In fact it’s all UNFAIR it’s the other way round… I have dealt with married creepy ugly men touching me by taking advantage of the crowd on school trips - we feel molested and exploited we feel like killing ourselves, and when a girl gets rejected for no reason she didn’t even like got chance to probably get liked for her personality or other things (we put make more efforts than all those good looking fair rich girls hoping we’ll get chosen by someone or the other) but at the end we get rejected not only for love or CARE, (every girl’s fav word) but also for emotional, financial and physical security, we are deprived of that too. We can’t depend on our old parents when we are surrounded by so many pervs who are getting further encouraged by INTERNET. Now all the pseudo feminists will be like - “You can’t learn Judo Karate (some of us have certain illnesses and unfortunately the ones triggered by stress are skyrocketing amongst girls that too chronic destabilising ones like Lupus (systematic disorder) Fibromyalgia, Hashimoto’s syndrome, Neurasthénia which I got after fibro due to cov & 5th Mar stress ) They will say “You can’t learn kick boxing? Karate? Pork chop? Use pepper spray…?” At the risk of what? Incurring their wrath & getting acid thrown at our face? “You can’t ask for a raise?” They sometimes pay more to men cuz they are the sole bread winners in some families and at times single girls and boys BOTH are given a smaller paycheck. There are places where they do add more zeroes for men but even after bringing up that topic things haven’t changed for us… next “Why can’t you work during your pregnancy why take a maternity leave? You are a woman we are strong invincible we don’t need that, how old fashioned? Why take an epidural? Why Caesarean? Why can’t you juggle work life and kids both? Why have children? Too primitive? Why can’t you have kids? Too ambitious? (Well there are several other reasons) Why be a homemaker? Why become a working girl? Be modern we don’t work 9 to 5… Why can’t you just party, booze and smoke and then grow your own weed, sell it & become an entrepreneur… like a female Pablo Picasso… why can’t you? Is it only for men?” All these pseudo feminists will immediately ask these things, the moment you talk about being deprived of emotional, physical or financial security which is like the need of the hour right now for females they’ll start asking such nonsensical questions that you’ll feel like pulling a trigger in your mouth instead of answering them. But what I meant to say is that is what rejection is for us. We have no hope left and our future becomes uncertain and scary. Speaking of wanting to move somewhere abroad… I would’ve probably stayed back if I had someone here, you stay for people you love… I have no one to keep me here, they actually all want me to die they are waiting for that. No one cares about my life or me…

Considering everything that I had to hear… (my head is paining so please ignore all the errors/typos) and how people have behaved with me especially him and my mother, I don’t want that forcer chaser tag anymore so if you are ready to accept me only then you can approach or if you want be friends then I’m also cool with that but don’t be fickle like him, if you are not sure then either stay away or be honest… if you don’t want me but still want to be around and if you are okay with risking your integrity although I’m very good at keeping secrets then we can have a half open marriage like I had suggested earlier. I had written all this long ago…

Girls like me who are considered “untalkable” can only dream of a platonic relationship… in my dreams sometimes I have someone by my side holding my hand when I feel like I’m dying during those convulsions or tremors and violent jerking/twitching throughout my body, I get wheezing too and even my heart muscles go through that; having said that in real life it involves romantic feelings minus intimacy and it’s unimaginable to think that someone would like us, we can use the other house mates alternative which again considering how he has made me… ugly and all and how much my mother hates having me around, I feel it would be difficult for someone to put up with me in the same environment, she keeps praying for my death cuz she “cannot stand me” (just like the guy I loved the most) and ego would want to hang around? I always wanted to be with him, watch TV, shop together, put my arm around his neck, talk, do fun things like sharing those interesting or unbelievable bizarre stories (well I have a lot now) build our home, decorate it and spend our life together, now that life is gone along with 8-10 years of my youth, I could never be with him. When they create characters like us on screen they show us like psychos, one sided forcers, they do cover these things like watching tv or preparing breakfast but we are still shown as some creep who is forcing someone to be around & craving for their presence, fighting for their time and attention. They depict us like those psychos and we end up feeling more scared 😱 hence we never talk about this. Speaking of mutualism, well maximum of these stories start off as not only mutual but also with loads of attention from the opposite side, they lure you and then humiliate. Also, who would want to watch TV with me? I can crack jokes and make you laugh if you want to be House Mates, you won’t get bored and if you aren’t like my mother then you’ll even get used to my appearance and it won’t bother you after some time. Platonic is where you can watch movies or tv together, as house mates we can use the living area as a common room apart from that we will have our own space where we can stay separately, My head is paining a lot and I have a lot of fever so I’m gonna continue the funny story tomorrow…

Gn Zara Sauleh

Coincidences - www.lilacnights.com/post/stupid-cupid

My Dream Life 👇🏻

Just so you know… this is My Dream Life. This is what I want, a warm cosy home, sunsets by the lake, Amsterdam canals & rivers, round windows, quaint little shops, egrets & ducks, some puppies, warm amber lights, 90s vibes, freshly baked viennoiseries 🥐 and love + a little bit of tranquility. Credit for videos - | utrechtalive | & | elbgestoeber | (couldn’t tag cuz I’ve seen some bloggers asking ppl to take down their videos so didn’t want to tag them I have added their usernames)

[rosetherat]

Doodles soo many doodles I’m mentally unwell I’m going to skin myself alive or something but how would you even do that like that doesn’t make sense I mean you could but could you really I don’t believe it I’d have to call a friend for help probably anyway enough about my weekend plans It’s like doodly doodles this time cause im like who’s that composer guy with the wig whoever he was im him but for art im like Jesus one of these days im gonna walk outside and the people will throw stones at me and I’ll go hey don’t do that and walk back inside because im smart and know they would never enter my house without me letting them in because they are polite okay moving on it’s monkey time ladies list your favourite monkey species below I’m being interactive see im interacting with you all isn’t this nice I still don’t know how this app works how do I reply to people when they say stuff about me do I just not or what what’s the social etiquette here still autistic no social skills this place is hell for me that’s why I only come on to post art and then like leave straight away I don’t even have notifs on for this thing I don’t like it it’s too scary okay moving on again did I already talk about monkeys probably is anyone even still reading r my two followers seeing this what’s that song where it’s like and it was all yellow yellows my favourite colour okay maybe pink is my favourite colour yeah yeah I love pink my whole room is pink I look at pink and I go yay! I’m like that hippo from fnaf he’s my number one kin now what’s a kin does rhat mean he’s my kid or what anyway I’m him now I’m a rambler I’m a rambling man I’m CRAZZAY it’s my Uber autism Uber speaking of happy late lesbian day I’m like the ultimate lesbian I’m the final boss probably maybe not I’m like a secret boss that you have to look up where to find me and it’s never worth it anyway can we go back to the doodle go back scroll up and look at it again and think wow what a doodle rat that’s a doodle alright why did I name myself rat why did I do that to myself okay it’s cause people used to call me a rat but I said no no no this is clearly not a being mean thing this is a cute endearing thing like a nickname because rats r cute so I embraced it because social cues don’t exist to me and If I wanna be a rat then dude, get me in a sewer or something let me scuttle around notice how I’m still going that’s called being unmedicated my brain goes faster than the speed of light I’m thinking about a minimum of ten things at the same time rn it sucks if any doctors r around and would like to shorten my waiting list wait so I could be medicated that’d be helpful I’ve been waiting like four years at this point how does it take four years for you to go hey here’s the medication you need like is it that hard wish I was a monkey they don’t get medicated they don’t have the technology for that GET ME OUT KF HEREE anyway bye bye my babas I just realised it’s 4:20 rn and I think that’s funny so I must fall asleep immediately so I fall asleep at the funny number this is the part where u tuck me in and give me a little kiss on the forehead warning I sleep with ten blankets and like three of them r weighted so you will have trouble tucking me in I can’t help it I’m like a little bear I like being warm if I had a cat or something I wouldn’t have to do this I want a cat so bad btw I need a little guy who will curl up on my chest and go meow at me to remind me of who I am WAKE ME UP WAKE ME UP INSIDEEE that’s me if I was emo okay I should wait another thing don’t forget the hot water bottle I sleep with like two hot water bottles you might be thinking how do you not overheat with ten blankets and two hot water bottles and the answer is I’m simply better than you also I’m always cold my body I can’t regulate my temperature it sucks im just so cold. Omg arg refrence the cold guy Ermm did you say guy? PURPLE GUY hor hor hor hor hor I love fnaf this is why I stick to twt they have a short word limit if they didn’t have that I’d be making whole novels this is just white noise omg channel referen

Oh my god I can still type this is like Christmas for me know that I never shut up is anyone still here if you make it through reply with like idk apples and I’ll send u my credit card information just kidding aha! I don’t use those because I’m paranoid the government can track me with them it’s all paper money for me teehee if I was a monkey I’d hope to be a proboscis monkey did you know they regurgitate their food and chew their cud that’s so dreamy majestic even wish I did that sadly I am just a little human lad anyway this time I’m really going im leaving I think Charlie’s ending stream so I have no more reason to be awake enjoy the art in the meantime my eyes hurt I’ve been sick for over a month is that normal I get headaches like every day and my eyes r always dry my nose is like an Olympic runner at this point that thing does not stop and as I am sick I deserve rest and like onion rings oh you don’t even know about the onion rings I’m eating on like an average 20 onion rings a day I can’t stop I can’t even help it it’s my autism taste buds I eat the same thing for like 2 months and then never wanna touch it again for like a year I can’t help it GUINEA PIGS I wish I had one I’d let it lay on my chest and go hello little guy this is why I need a cat that will cuddle with me I need it right now get me one someone assign a cat to me I need it to crawl through my window one day and refuse to leave how would a cat even get through my window they can’t climb that high okay he just ended tbis means I can leave now please look at the art it’s not even art it’s a doodle anyway goodbye

#some cheese grater sprinkled in #I’m in constant pain everything sucks #rat doodles rat doodling

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

hi raven !! do u have any moots who are people u looked up to before u became moots with them? just curious :-)

Hmmmm... 🤔 A good question!

When I first started out writing, my two inspirations were twstpasta (Mac) and panacea-wishes (Lily). Mac had a very clean and simple interface and a whimsical way of writing, whereas Lily edited together her own banners and focused more on pretty descriptions... I wanted my writing blog to have its own unique flavor like Mac's and Lily's did!

You'll notice that I wrote the last paragraph in past tense, and that's because both of those writers have since terminated their respective blogs and moved elsewhere💦 but to this day, I still really love them and the work that they do! If you’re interested in continuing to follow them too, you can find Mac at @mcdonaldsnumberone and Lily at @fairlyabookie. However, please note that they no longer take writing requests; they only write what and when they wish to.

Another predominantly text-based blog I enjoyed (and still enjoy!) reading is @pianostarinwonderland. It's mainly a dumping ground for TWST thoughts and theories, which I do also sometimes share on my own blog. It's a place I go to when I need to get my brain juices flowing, and sometimes the things they point out make me develop more of an appreciation for the details of TWST! (I also used to be an Azul stan, so I'd run to a fellow Azul stan to feel validated in my screaming, ahah~)

Back around the start of my TWST journey, I mainly relied on @kibadreams and jmee for story translations and rough summaries, respectively. Kibadreams does their best to retain the original “voice” of every character when they translate, and they’re very open about the potential translating mistakes they may have made and they’re striving to improve! Jmee really goes in on the details and the deeper meaning behind character relationships and TWST lore. I really appreciate the work that they have done for the community!

Special shoutout to @mysteryshoptls, whom I first got to know as a friend before they initially set up their translation blog. They’re a great source for vignettes and character lines; their translations really retain the spirit of the original characters in Japanese.

There are also a lot of artists in the TWST fandom that I admire! Seeing their posts always puts a smile on my face, and it inspires me to work hard at my own things too. I especially like seeing their own OCs and takes on certain scenes and characters from the game. It gives me confidence to share my own original works~

@4nimenut (They use very delicate brushstrokes that remind me of watercolors or traditional Chinese paintings! The lighting in their pieces is also very atmospheric~)

@airin-queenz (A very bright and cheery art style! The colors and the shading really pop out.)

@beth-lau (I love how they draw expressions! The arrangement and details... they really bring out the emotions that every character is feeling.)

@k0ushii (Their sketchy art style and color choice is very soft and easy on the eyes! They've also done gijinkas for Cookie Run and FNAF characters, which I absolutely adore the designs for!)

@lolitsleia (I love how dumb their OC Alex and Ace are together! lolitsleia really does a bit of everything, from nice fully rendered pieces to funny little sketches and comics of the characters interacting with each other!)

@myuunji (Their Yuu is really adorable and clumsy! It's lots of fun keeping up their shenanigans in the little doodles and comics they make.)

@pearlwhitecats (Their love for Silver is really pure! I can feel it come off in every Nahime x Silver work they make. I'm also a fan of their cutiepie OC Neviah~)

@renniecirque (Ren has a really unique art style! It almost looks like traditional art instead of digital because of how soft the colors and the line art is. It gives me cottagecore vibes! Very soothing to look at~)

@shimmeryspark (Kana's art is both cute and detailed! While their fully rendered pieces are a treat, I also really like their chibis--they look so round and squishy, I just want to pinch them with my fingers! Their shrimp-based OCs and Kana (the Yuusona) with Floyd and Ruggie are also adorable and pure~)

@stupidneko (I like how big and expressive their eyes are! I also really love the little details they add to accentuate various pieces, like tiny sparkles or little tuffs of cotton.)

@suiiseis (We share a mutual appreciation and intense brain rot for J word I like how dainty their style is, from the lithe forms of their characters to the way they draw eyes and hair!)

@teuffels (Their vibrant, bouncy colors really bring pieces to life! They also get really experimental with poses and compositions, which always keeps you guessing. Plus, their love for Lilia and Xiao is just so wholesome and endearing!)

@tinyfantasminha (I adore their OC Vic's sass and their breakdowns over Jack Howl! They're very talented with drawing poses and coloring in a way that mimics the TWST style!)

@yttrocen (An artist with a very soft and pastel color palette, mainly doing comics and doodles. If I'm not mistaken, they mainly do Tweels, which I can appreciate~)

@zariyen (Yuu Yumehara my beloved he's so cool and hot and-- I'm a huge fan of zari's work on alternate outfits for Pomefiore! Everything they do is really gorgeously detailed; I could stare at their pieces forever and ever!)

It feels like a really big honor when someone you look up to follows you back! It's like one of those "wow, senpai noticed me" moments you see sometimes in anime or manga. Of course, I'm not super close to everyone that I listed in this post, and I’ve also met a lot of amazing people and made friends that I didn’t include here (since they didn’t quite fit the parameters of the ask)!!

Please consider checking out their socials and supporting them!! Let’s keep exploring this twisted wonderland together 🎵

#it feels weird thinking about how many people I met because of TWST #dhjssdgsjsbjsw it has been a wild ride #to the people I pinged in this post #I’m sorry if the pings annoy or bother you 💦 #question #shoutout #notes from the writing raven

[gojology]

— gojo, megumi, yuuji | crushing on dense fem reader

the request :

pairing : gojo, megumi, and yuuji x dense fem! reader warnings : cursing, no proof reading wordcount : 1212 a/n : anon i cant believe u asked for hcs when im this bad at writing them ... girl r u good ?

GOJO SATORU  ‧₊˚✩彡.

☆ Now, Gojo is as straightforward as it gets with relationships. 

☆ When Gojo first realized he had a thing for you, he was all for it! I mean, what’s not to like about you? 

☆ He obviously forgot how dense you are. Any expression of love towards you was fruitless, it was like you didn’t give another thought. 

☆ He would wrap a hand around your waist, call you affectionate nicknames, show you off to a very disgusted  and uninterested Yuuji and Nobara. Rarely did Megumi join in, he was probably off doing his own thing.

☆ You just thought he was being friendly. 

☆ He finds your density kind of enduring, often finding himself studying you, just to make sure no one’s hurting you. 

☆ Gojo felt like some sort of guardian angel looking after you 24/7, but he doesn’t mind watching you.

☆ I feel like sometimes he just straight up says, “I like you.” you chalk it up as some sort of... twisted joke. And he’s getting frustrated at this point.

☆ When you’re off campus, off doing your own thing, he discusses with Shoko, asking her what his best chances are. 

☆ Gojo absolutely follows every advice Shoko gives him, even if it’s stupid, because honestly he hasn’t got any experience with a girl as dumb as you. He’s tried everything at this point!

☆ When you and Gojo are doing your own thing, alone, he leans in real close to you, and it takes everything in him to not kiss your lips. That’s what Shoko thinks might work, near physical contact was enough of a sign to say, “Hey! I like you.” 

☆ Shoko always says that you probably won’t realize any approach other then a direct one, and this was direct enough right?

☆ This piece of advice he particularly ignores, though. He doesn’t go all the way with the advice, he’s scared of ruining the friendship, no matter what Shoko says.

☆ He values you as a friend so deeply, you always seem to forget that he’s the most powerful, and he enjoys the normal relationship between the two of you.

☆ Gojo never, ever wants to lose that. He’d rather call you pumpkin then the rest of his life, while you obliviously stared back, then call you another friendship gone haywire. 

☆ So you two just look at each other, all silent. You’re obviously curious why he’s staring at you with a starving pair of eyes, but eventually he laughs it off and hands you his favorite candy that he always kept in his pocket. 

☆ He hands you your favorite flavor, because he always remembers it. 

☆ You walk away, chewing and rolling the candy around on your tongue, and he wishes he could taste how your mouth tastes afterward. 

MEGUMI FUSHIGURO ‧₊˚✩彡.

☆ Poor Megumi over here, he’s basically a tsundere.

☆ Megumi hate’s confrontation, so he does EVERYTHING in his power so he doesn’t have to tell you directly.

☆ Nonetheless, he has a horribly bad crush on you. He also has trouble hiding it.

☆ Thing is, he doesn’t want to fuck up the friendship. After all, he was your “study partner”. 

☆ You’d often find yourself in his room, analyzing old Jujutsu writings for Gojo’s homework assignments. (Why the guy assigned homework, you have no idea.)

☆ Megumi was silent. He didn’t like speaking unless being spoken to. This changed with you. 

☆ While you’re writing or doodling in your journal, he sneaks glances at you. 

☆ Once in a while, he’ll realize you’re writing a word incorrectly.

☆ Instead of taking an eraser like any normal person does, Megumi insists that he would help you write out the words

☆ Holding your hand, he’d guide you, muttering the letters under his breath.

☆ He wishes he could hold your hand forever, it’s warm compared to his cold ones, and then his mind wanders.

☆ Wondering just how warm your cuddles get. 

☆ Blushing ferociously now, he looks down at the paper, and you look at him, confused as to why he stopped writing. 

☆ He’s incredibly stiff, he doesn’t wanna think about that while you’re right in front of him. You tap him a few times, and he jolts back to Earth. 

☆ You ask him what he was doing, but he doesn’t reply, instead stroking your hand’s skin and grumbling words you couldn’t understand. 

☆ You sit there, maybe he has anxiety, that’s why he’s stroking you like a therapy cat. 

☆ Megumi’s weighing out the positives and negatives of asking you out right this second, but his anxiety prevents him. He touches your skin subconsciously. 

☆ Negatives always seem to win though, he doesn’t wanna risk losing his friend. He turns back to look at your face once more, fluttering his long eyelashes, taking a deep breath in, and continuing the assignment. 

☆ “Next time” is all that echoes in the back of his mind.

☆ You just think it’s a bit weird, to be honest. Why does he look at you that way?

☆ You just think that he has his moments of too intensely thinking. 

ITADORI YUUJI ‧₊˚✩彡.

☆Like you, Yuuji’s also dense. ☆ Unlike you, he has the power and the courage of asking Gojo what these feelings were. ☆ “Yuuji-kun, have you ever felt love for someone special before?” ☆ “No, what’s that, Gojo-senpai?”  ☆ “That’s the feeling you get around (Y/N). You think she’s cute, I bet that.” ☆ That’s how the bastard found out he had a crush on you, through his equally as stupid teacher. ☆ This clearly spelled out disaster. ☆ Whenever you and Yuuji went out on missions, Yuuji would offer to cover for your role in the mission as well, claiming that you needed a break. ☆ “Why?” you’d ask ☆ “Because, I like you.” ☆ “Wow, Itadori-kun! You’re really nice!” you say, a smile on your lips, “Honestly though that’s a lot of work on your shoulders, I think I’ll-” ☆ He would stop you in his tracks, and kind of look at you. ☆ Yuuji thinks your work ethic is precious, and he deeply admires that. ☆ He also thinks your density is really cute, but he worries that he’s not masculine enough for you. ☆ This is why he tries to appear more, “macho” as he says it, around you ☆ But inside, he’s soft, and soft for you only. ☆ Despite his usual friendly and carefree personality, he would punt someone into the horizon if they looked at you different. He was overprotective that way. ☆ But you never truly got the hint, and he always was upset by this, in which Gojo would comfort him, and the cycle would restart. ☆ But here’s the problem: he doesn’t want to ruin the relationship. As much as he trusts Gojo, nothing was showing out of his obvious flirting, and eventually his confidence wore out. ☆ Sometimes he still tries talking to you in that flirty manner, but you just tilt your head and kinda go, “What?” ☆ Giving you a big, reassuring grin, he gives you a thumbs up. ☆ He sighs as he does so, telling you, “Nevermind.” and talks about something else. ☆ Deep down, he’s cursing himself out, he thinks it’s all his fault and not you just being stupid.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jujutsu kaisen headcanons #jujutsu kaisen headcanon #jujutsu kaisen hcs #jjk headcanon #jjk headcanons #jjk hcs #jujutsu kaisen scenarios #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x y/n #jujutsu kaisen x you #gojo satoru hcs #gojo satoru #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru x y/n #jujutsu kaisen gojo satoru #jjk gojo satoru #megumi fushiguro hcs #megumi fushiguro #megumi fushiguro x reader #megumi fushiguro x you #megumi fushiguro x y/n #jujutsu kaisen megumi fushiguro #jjk megumi fushiguro #itadori yuuji hcs #itadori yuuji #itadori yuuji x reader #itadori yuuji x you

[tenswrld]

old enough to understand

mark lee x reader, childhood friends to lovers, fluff

summary: now that you’re older, you seem to finally understand how mark makes you feel

a/n: came up with this at 2am while listening to my mark lee dedicated playlist and pluto projector came on and u already know that one part made me emotional also do u like my doodles i made on the photo ^^

growing up, you were surrounded by the concept of love. you witnessed it with your parents, when you got your first pet, and even when you took your first bite into your favorite fruit.

when you first met mark lee at the age of 6, you didn’t think that the word love would apply to him. at least, not in the way that you knew it. 

“no! it’s mine, i don’t want to give you any!” the young boy yelled.

“you can just go get more! i just want some watermelon!” you screamed back.

“go get some yourself!”

angry, you stomped away towards the table of adults. “mrs. lee, mark won’t give me a piece of his watermelon.”

the older woman laughed softly before getting up and leading you to the table of fruit. “forgive him, watermelon is his favorite. i’ll be sure to make sure he shares next time, okay?”

while you ate your own fruit alone in the grass, mark came up to you scratching his neck awkwardly, avoiding eye contact. “i’m sorry for being rude...i just really like watermelon...”

you narrowed your eyes at him before bursting into a fit of giggles, offering your own watermelon out to him. “it’s okay, mark, i like watermelon too. i understand.” he took the piece that you held out to him and took a seat next to you.

when you first met mark, you didn’t think anything of him except for that he was the dorky boy next door who seemed to reserve the concept of love for his favorite fruit.

in middle school, you and mark seemed to clash heads more often than not, and you found it hard to stick around him. desperate to seem cool in front of the new friends that he made, mark steered away from you and teased you whenever he saw you in the halls. you almost despised him in your middle school years, but no matter how much teasing he did mark always waited for you outside of the school gates and walked you home safely. 

though he was still unsure of the role you had in his life, mark knew that he wanted to keep you around.

in high school, your parents fantasized about the idea of the two of you dating, but you and mark always recoiled at the thought. friend groups and social status set you and mark even further apart and before you knew it you became a messenger to girls who wanted mark to call their own. when you got your first boyfriend in sophomore year, mark tried to warn you that the guy was no good, but like always you never listened to him. when he broke your heart, you expected mark to scold you and tell you he told you so, but he provided you comfort in his arms instead.

though he didn’t love you then, mark vowed that he would never let your heart get broken again.

when it came time for you and mark to go off to college, you found yourself a lot more upset than you had initially thought you would be. you were excited to go off and find yourself elsewhere, but something about not having the silly, brown haired boy by your side 24/7 felt strange. granted, you two weren’t as close as your six year old self thought you would be, but you found that you and mark held a special type of bond that you feared you wouldn’t find anywhere else. 

you still hadn’t figured out your love for mark lee, but you knew that leaving him was one of the hardest things you’ve ever had to do.

“just...promise to call often, okay?” you told him as you walked with him to his car, a box of his things in your arms.

mark’s lips curled up into a smug smile. “why? gonna miss me that much?” 

you rolled your eyes. “you’re making me regret saying that. you’ll be lucky if i don’t block you after this, idiot.”

mark laughed loudly and you found yourself smiling softly at the sound. you placed the box in his truck before you both turned to each other. “i’ll text you everyday and call when i can. don’t worry, you can’t get rid of me that easily. you’ll probably be hearing about my uncontrollable gas everyday so if that’s not what you’re looking for then...”

you laughed and shoved his shoulder, mumbling for him to shut up. “it’s gonna be weird without you, i think.”

mark shrugged. “yeah, well, we’ll see each other again. just think about it like that time where you got so mad at me for blowing up your house in minecraft that you ignored me for a week!”

mark expected you to laugh but became concerned when he saw your lip quivering and your eyes threatening to spill tears. “y/n? sorry, is that, like, a sensitive memory?”

when you suddenly wrapped your arms around his torso and mumbled a soft ‘i’ll miss you’ into his chest, mark cursed at himself for being the first one to fall in love.

___

“isn’t it like 4am for you? you should go to bed,” you scolded him half heartedly. you sat at your vanity on facetime with a sleepy mark as you did your nightly skincare routine.

mark groaned through the phone and shook his head. “but i wanna talk to you,” he whined groggily. “i miss you.”

your cheeks heat up and you smiled shyly. “i miss you too, mark.”

mark blinked slowly with a tired look, his hair all messed up and his face in need of a shave. he watched you silently as you rubbed your moisturizer into your skin, smiling at the sight. “...you’re really pretty you know that?”

you froze and chuckled nervously, keeping yourself busy with your moisturizer so you didn’t have to see the way mark was looking at you. “you’re talking nonsense again.”

he grumbled, “i’m not talking any nonsense. you’re so pretty, y/n, i miss seeing your face. i hate facetime and my shit wifi.”

“you’re rambling, marky, go to bed,” you ushered him, this time grabbing your phone to look at him.

he smiled fondly at you. “i like it when you call me marky.”

“okay, i’ll call you it more if you go to bed.” 

mark huffed and complied, bidding you one last goodbye. “fine. i miss you so much, y/n, call me tomorrow.”

“okay, i will.”

“promise?” mark asked softly, peeking open one eye to look at you.

“i promise, you big baby.”

“okay, goodnight. love you,” mark mumbled softly into his pillow, already half asleep.

your breath hitched in your throat at his words. you two hardly ever said that phrase to each other but you began to realize that nowadays mark seemed to say it quite often. before, you’d probably make a face in disgust at the cheesiness, but now it only made your stomach sick with butterflies.

“yeah, love you too, marky. sleep tight.” 

already fast asleep, mark stayed silent. your thumb hovered over the ‘end call’ button, but you waited a few more seconds just to look at how peaceful mark looked. you could see the sky turning from a dark black to a paler blue from his window, making you frown since the boy had stayed up so late. before you could look at him any longer, you ended the call and sat back in your chair.

loving mark lee had always seemed impossible to you, but now you realized that it was the one thing that you wanted to do for the rest of your life.

___

you spent a lot of time thinking about your feelings for mark while you were away and most of it was you being in denial. you thought that maybe it was just because you weren’t used to being so far away from him, but deep down you knew otherwise. your friends had tried setting you up on blind dates, yet no one seemed to fill in the gap that you felt you had in your heart.

after you finished your first year of college, your mother began to pester you about having a boyfriend for you to bring home for the holidays. yet no matter how many guys you thought about, your mind would always bring you back to mark.

it was now christmas time and your family and mark’s family were going to have a small get together, meaning that you and mark would get to spend time with each other in person again. you weren’t sure if you should tackle mark at the sight of him, but you figured he would do the same to you anyway.

“y/n, sweetheart! my gosh, it’s been so long! you’ve grown up so well,” mark’s mother cooed as she gave you a warm hug.

you chuckled and returned her hug, replying with, “thank you, mrs. lee. it’s nice to see you again.”

she playfully nudged your shoulder. “any boyfriend yet?”

you laughed awkwardly and shook your head, looking away. “oh, um, no...not yet.”

she beamed. “mark will be happy to hear that.” she said it so fast that you almost didn’t catch it. “he’s out back waiting for you. i told him i’d tell him when you got here, but it’ll be a nice surprise for him,” she winked.

you thanked her briefly before making your way to the backyard excitedly. you thought that you’d be more nervous facing the boy you loved but, frankly, all you wanted to do was finally tell him that you loved him.

when you opened the door mark immediately turned his head, expecting to see his mom, but his facial expression completely changed when he saw you. he ran up to you with the brightest smile on his face and engulfed you into his arms. you laughed joyously into his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you as close to his chest as humanly possible.

“you have no idea how long i’ve been waiting to do that,” he mumbled into your hair.

you smiled against his shoulder before pulling away to look at him. the two of you held eye contact for what felt like an eternity before mark finally returned his arms back to his side.

“even though we call everyday, it feels like i’m meeting you for the first time all over again,” mark said with a light laugh.

“i hope i lived up to your expectations, then,” you joked.

mark smiled fondly at you before brushing snow out of your hair. “definitely above expectations.”

you blushed at his comment but thanked the cold weather for hiding your rosy cheeks. before you could make more small talk, mark burst out into another sentence.

“y/n, i have to get this off of my chest before i explode,” he blurted.

your eyes widened and you nodded your head. “oh, um, okay, what is it?”

he gripped at his hair and turned around, beginning to whine. “oh my god, i’m gonna sound like the biggest idiot on earth. please don’t hate me after this.”

“...what did you do, mark?”

“i didn’t do anything! well...” he faced you again with a sigh and grabbed your hands taking you by surprise. “y/n, i’m in love with you. and i know you probably just see me as that stupid annoying boy your mom forced you to be friends with but i’ve loved you for over a year and it’s driving me crazy and i-”

“mark!” you interrupted him, placing a hand over his mouth. he looked at you with wide eyes while you smiled at him, practically glowing with happiness. you removed your hand from over his mouth and he sighed again.

“just reject me so i can go cry in my room.” mark shut his eyes and prepared himself for rejection but it never came.

“i love you too, mark.”

mark opened one at to stare at you suspiciously. “...really? like, seriously?”

you chuckled. “yes, really. for a few months now.”

“wait, you’re not pranking me or anything, right?” mark asked with a small laugh.

you glared at him. “mark...”

“i’m sorry, i’m just really surprised!” mark opened his mouth to say something but then gasped and dug into his back pocket to grab something.

when he pulled out a small piece of mistletoe you seemed to fall in love with the brunette boy all over again. he grabbed one of your hands and gently pulled you closer to him, using the other hand to hold the mistletoe over your guys’ heads. 

“i brought this just in case. i know that you’ve always fantasized about a moment like this so...” he said sheepishly. “kiss me?”

you laughed and brushed his hair out of his eyes before cupping his cheeks and placing a soft kiss on his lips. you felt him smile into the kiss, making you laugh and pull away.

“been waiting for that one too, huh?” you teased.

mark waved the mistletoe above the two of you and shook his head. “less talking and more kissing please...”

it took you over 10 years for you to realize that you loved mark lee but, if you had to, you would do it all over again in a heartbeat.

#mark lee #mark lee x reader #mark lee oneshot #mark lee fluff #NCT #nct fanfic #nct fluff #nct imagines #nct 127 #nct dream #nct mark #nct oneshot #im so bad at writing confession scenarios im so sorry #superm #mark lee oneshots

[eureka-its-zico]

Irrevocably Yours Pt. 2

Part 1 

Request: hey! can i request a scenario of jungkook being a rich kid who has some of his legs is leg failure , basically can't walk without a cane , And he falls in love with a normal girl , and they end up running away , happy ending plz , also if u can , LIT IT Up with smut ' thank u ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

A/N: So Part 2 is that slow burn build up (with possible cute moments?) and part 3 will be the actual SMUTTY goodness. Hopefully this is something cute and fluffy that is enjoyable and helps progress the story a little more so when a full length next part of a bunch of smut comes it all makes sense. Or idk anymore lol I edited this thing four times and I just really hope you all like it  Please enjoy this wordy mess. I wasn’t sure how to properly write it out the end and yeah...I winged it. If it needs to be fixed lmk please!! As always, I hope you all enjoy. Much love, Jenn

P.s. when I wrote this I listened to Lauv’s “I Like Me Better,” and Pink Sweat$ Feat. Kehlani’s “At My Worst,” on repeat like crazy.

Jungkook x Reader

Word count: 15,496 (I know:it’s a hefty boy)

Genre: Fluffy/Smutty, slow burn, 

The next day at school you weren’t a hundred percent sure what was going to happen. And sure, maybe you did wake up from a dream replaying that moment in the mud. The ending is a little bit different. This time, dream you didn’t let your chance to kiss him go by. When the opportunity presented itself, and you were both looking at one another like before, you’d leaned forward and kissed him. You weren’t surprised to feel him kissing you back. 

You could still feel the ghost of the imagination of him leaning down to press his lips against yours. The way he leaned in; eyes soft with longing as his body leaned deeper in against you. The weight of him pressing you into the mud until you were sure an imprint of this moment would be there forever. This imaginary kiss you’d shared was sweet, chaste, and everything you could’ve hoped for. Deepening at the last second as your alarm blared you back into realty. 

It made you want to ring your hands through your hair in frustration. 

Your whole walk to school was nothing but foggy images of the dream on repeat. A mixture of yesterday’s events accompanied them with each frame until you weren’t sure which was the actual moments or what your head had created. I mean, you did know he didn’t kiss you, but...the look in his eyes. Maybe Jungkook hadn’t, but there was that moment you swore maybe he felt the painful comedic romance moment of it all too. 

All these unanswered what if’s you'd created had built an impossible chasm that seemed to stretch infinitely wider between you in your head. In the end, you were your own bully as your mind stayed up until three that morning playing out every scenario you could think of. Even the ones that ended with you probably reading everything wrong, because what did you know about body language? Or, more specifically, boys built like Jeon Jungkook.

It didn’t matter that you had two tests today and never finished your homework for home period, but what the hell. Nothing like hopelessly daydreaming about the boy who may or may not have flirted with you and harmonized along to songs with a hidden voice of an angel, am I right? And sure, a large part of your night was  spent chastising yourself half the time to remind you there was no way in hell Jungkook could feel that way towards you. Even just a little. Your inner monologue of bringing yourself back down to earth, another culprit in the growing list of reasons why none of your assignments were completed. 

What can you say? You were a mess.

Your only game plan you’d been able to agree on was just to daydream out the window. Writing out your own hapless love story starring the boy who sat across from you in the home room. With a silent plea to the universe that you weren’t called on to answer any questions. 

Your arrival at homeroom was met with barely seconds to spare. The bell rang behind you, and a few other students, as you rushed towards your desk. 

“Hurry, hurry to your seats! Or I’ll write you up as late!”

Mr. Choi was all talk. Everyone knew it and his excessive arm movements to rush every body that passed his desk made him look exactly like a conductor. His crazy movements were enough to distract you for a split second from the one person you were desperate to ignore. 

“Good morning, class. I hope you are all fully rested and awake for class this morning. Let’s have us open our books to page two hundred and forty-two and continue on with our lesson.” 

In unison the sound of backpacks unzipping with students reaching in their backpacks to bring out textbooks filled the class. The only person who didn’t currently have said book was holding his hand up, and seated directly across from you. 

“Yes, Jungkook?”

“Seonsaengnim, I’m sorry. I haven’t received my textbooks yet.”

“Ah, that’s alright, Jungkook. You can go ahead and share with Y/N, again.”

You hoped your face wasn’t giving away the panic you felt rising up to match the blush that was streaking across your cheeks. Jungkook’s hand was already on the leg of your desk. His fingers tips grazing across your knee in passing as his hand wrapped around the bar and used it to bring you closer to him. You kept your eyes glued to page two hundred and forty-three and refused to look in his direction. Jungkook seemed to find a way to remedy this; his hand came into view and grabbed hold of the book corner and slid it over to his side. And as if he was the world’s greatest magician, he now had your attention. 

Your eyes immediately shoot up to acknowledge his presence, instead of staying on the book. You knew that devilish smirk of his would be there to greet you even before you actually saw it. 

“Well, good morning to you too, Y/N.”

His voice practically hummed a tune as he spoke. His eyes heavily searched your face, and you prayed whatever he found wasn’t any lasting signs of rosy cheeks. 

“Good morning, Jungkook. I hope you slept well.”

“I slept very well, thank you.”

“That’s good-“

He cut you off fast, his next words a hush of teasing: “Even though some crazy girl tried to smother me in mud yesterday.” 

Your world narrowed in on his smug position in his chair, but quickly realized he just wanted your attention. The smile he wore softened around the edges as his eyes tried to look away from you and yet found their way back. You did your best to hide your smile and must have failed miserably for his face noticeably brightened. 

“I’m sure if that’s what she was doing - which I doubt - you probably deserved it.” 

Jungkook pretended to be wounded and caused you to practically jump out of your seat when his free hand landed on top of yours. 

“I can’t believe you think I deserve to be smothered,” he pouted. 

You rolled your eyes in a weak attempt to look away from him. Anything to not be swallowed up by how stupidly cute he looked in this exact moment. The fingers that held your pencil lazily tapping on the pages of the math book to bring his focus to something else that wasn’t you. 

“We need to pay attention.”

It was the only valuable excuse you could come up with to look away from him. But who were you kidding? You didn’t have to be looking in Jungkook’s direction to be painfully aware that he was there. His own gaze burned straight through you and left a trail of heat everywhere his eyes seemed to land. 

Right now, you were aware they were on your lips and stirring every emotion from your dream you tried to suppress. Plus, you weren’t being cute. Unless Jungkook found the sight of you chewing your bottom lip into dust attractive. 

It was a terrible nervous habit that seemed to only backfire right this second. You were sure he was ready to make a comment on it. You waited patiently for it to come in between you mindlessly copying equations off the board and the sea of arms flying up to answer whatever it was you’d just written. My gosh, you were trying so damn hard to not pay attention that you were doing nothing but paying attention to him. 

Please don’t let him just see I’m doodling. 

Mr. Choi was in the middle of showing how to work out a long equation when you decided it was safe to give Jungkook a glance. It was instantaneous how quickly you regretted it. 

You jumped back against your seat in a weak attempt to recover some space. You weren’t exactly sure how you’d missed it -missed him- getting so close, but you had. Jungkook’s face was mere inches from yours and it took everything to not show him you weren’t at all bothered. 

“Jungkook,” you whispered fiercely. “What.are.you.doing!”

Jungkook ignored your question. His eyes squinting as they looked around the side of your head. The gesture made you increasingly subconscious until you couldn’t keep your hand from going up to brush alongside it. 

“What? What is it?”

You were expecting the worst. 

“I think I see some mud still stuck inside your ear.”

And like magic your earlier blush reappeared. Your tongue rolled against the bottom of your teeth in a weak attempt to keep yourself from smiling. Unfortunately, you weren’t able to stop it as the urge to give in tugged mercilessly at your lips. The playful glint in his eyes was enough to keep the panic of how incredibly close he still was. Your eyes hopelessly glancing at the pair of lips that plagued your dreams. 

Jungkook noticed. 

And how did you know this, you might ask? 

Jungkook gave it away by the dramatic way his lower lip was drawn in by his teeth. Every movement he made sure was exaggerated and stupidly slow. His eyes watch for your reaction. He didn’t have to wait long; your eyes were glued to them long before his teeth joined the equation. You should’ve felt more embarrassed at your own blunt display - or maybe at his -but, god help you, you weren’t. 

You tore your gaze away from him and did your best to pretend whatever part of the lesson you’d missed was interesting. The dirt on your shoes could’ve been more interesting at this moment; anything to keep you from looking back at him. 

“I rinsed my hair three times in the shower. Thank you very much.” 

“Did you think of me while you were washing yourself clean?”

If what Jungkook was after was seeing your face light up brighter than a tomato he’d succeeded. Your cheeks instantly flushed and felt scolding hot. The only line of defense you could think of to fight the devilish look in his eyes was to give him a smack on his arm. The motion only caused his sinister smile to turn into a full blown grin; a bark of laughter leaving him seconds later. 

Jungkook chuckled out an, “Ouch!” His body leaning back, faux wounded, and rays of sunshine pouring out of him in waves. 

“I meant when you were getting the mud out of your hair.” His voice carried the singing sweetness of his laughter; airy and light. This boy who you did think of in the shower. All hard edges and softness; sour and sweet. Your very own sour patch kid. “I mean, I thought of you when I tried scrubbing it out from behind my ears.”

Your heart gave a brief jump at his omission. What you wished you would’ve focused on was the fact he’d admitted to thinking of you...in his own shower. But nope! Instead, your mind appeared to focus more on the fact it was while he scrubbed at his ears. 

“I scrubbed my ears too.”

Oh. My. God, you inwardly cringed. 

Is that really what your magical brain decided to say in return? Jungkook leaned back in, eyes inspecting not just your ear, but your entire space. Recklessly moving in dangerously close, and your heart was ready to beg for mercy. Whether to completely close the space between you or to stop teasing, of which you weren’t sure. 

“It appears you didn’t do that good of a job,” he huffed.

A gurgled scream flew into your throat; the sound was utterly ridiculous and Jungkook ate it up. His head flew back in laughter as your hand moved to swat at him again. 

The disruption turned the attention of your teacher directly to the two of you, and Mr. Choi was quick to address it. 

“Jean Jungkook! Y/L/N, Y/N!”

The both of you rose from your seats in unison. Jungkook’s rise the definition of graceful, while yours in comparison was met with anxiety and your knees colliding with your desk. Your small “Oomph,” of pain sending him into a fit of giggles beside you. The hand you sent in to pinch at his leg only sent him into another fit. 

“Y/N!”

Stupid, stupid! Of course he would see.

“Seonsaengnim!”

To appease him, you felt your body respond in a ninety-degree salute. Your face keeping down to stare at your shoes and praying you weren’t about to be sent out of the room. 

“Would you mind explaining what Jungkook and you found so interesting that the two of you felt like you didn’t need to be a part of class.”

God, it wasn’t a question. He really wanted you to tell him, and what could you say? 

“Oh, he was just asking me if I was in the shower...thinking of him. And he was thinking of me too!”

Which wasn't a lie. Maybe it wasn’t as dirty as he might have intended, but it was enough to make your cheeks flush to life with their usual color these days. Your mind was still racing with an appropriate answer for Mr. Choi. You were taking so long you were ready to blurt out anything he might want to hear. 

“Seonsaengnim.” Jungkook gave a respectful bow and lifted his head. His full attention now resting on the impatiently waiting man at the front of the class. “We were discussing the fact that you, respectfully, have written the equation wrong on the board.” 

The entire class seized up. A collective air was taken at Jungkook’s bold attempt to correct him. It was awkwardly obvious that he wasn’t happy at the idea of being corrected. However, Jungkook remained unfazed and waited for the right time to speak. 

“Is that so?” He snapped. “If it is so wrong, Jeon, then please, come and fix it for me.”

You were sure his order for Jungkook to go to the front would make him back down . No one enjoyed doing class work on the board up front for all to see. But you’d forgotten Jungkook wasn’t like everyone else. He kept his head high and moved to grab his cane; his hand wrapping tightly to its handle. Jungkook stepped out from inside his desk and let his feet carry him forward. He walked with a noticeable lack of a limp and you were willing to bet that strike of pride was costing him. 

It wasn’t that you couldn’t believe that Jungkook was able to walk without it. It was just that your memory forced you to recall the pain he was in during the field trip. The flashes of frustration as his eyes threatened to spill over with tears. 

Jungkook came to stand beside Mr. Choi. His hand reaching out to take the marker that the older man had held out waiting for him to prove his equation wrong. He plucked it from the older man’s hand and moved the last few inches to stand in front of the board. His eyes scanning the problem quickly. Your breath held tight in your chest as you watched him get permission to grab the eraser. The class transfixed on his every movement.

You wondered how many of the girls in your class focused on him like you were. The same way your eyes ate up every simple movement he made. The notable flex of his back while he stretched to erase the middle and last part of what Mr. Choi had written out. 

“You had a good start here, Seonsaengnim.” Jungkook paused to stretch out his hand. Fingers marking underneath the start of the problem. “But you didn’t multiply these after they were divided, and because of this the middle became wrong. With your core of the problem being wrong the solution was never able to end in its final conclusion.”

With every word, Jungkook’s voice became more self-assured. His presence enveloping the room and demanding the attention he’d already received without question. Mr. Choi watched on with his arms crossed; index finger hugging his mouth in concentration as he watched Jungkook work. From the back of the class, you could see students writing down the new formula. Some of them realized the obvious error Mr. Choi had made. 

Jungkook looked at the problem over again on repeat. If it’d been you, you would have left it where it was knowing you’d done what no one else did. But Jungkook wanted to know, for himself, that it was correct. 

Finally, he stepped back from the whiteboard and handed the marker back to Mr. Choi. Who looked measurably impressed with him. His index finger he’d used for thinking now covered up a timid smile before he dropped it to grab a hold of the marker. 

“Go ahead and have a seat, Jungkook.”

Jungkook gave him a passing bow as he made his way back towards the back of the class. Back to you. It took everything you had not to notice how everyone’s view of him seemed to change. Even the honor students; the ones bound for scholarship glory to prestigious colleges now seemed to take new interest in him. 

You’d heard stories about Jungkook, like everyone else did. The Boy Wonder. The boy who seemed unfairly good at everything. Before you’d ever met him, a part of you believed there wasn’t a way the universe would seriously do that. And yet, as he moved to sit back down beside you, you suddenly felt the overwhelming sensation of being below average. Your subconscious rose up to stop whatever sunlight you’d felt at his earlier words, and crushed it until it began to dim. All but snuffing it out. 

Jungkook fell back into the seat at his desk riding the high of confidence he’d gained from proving he’d know how to fix the answer. Not just know it; teach it. The air around him completely changed. He was the sun and the rest of you were becoming helplessly lost in his orbit. From the backwards glances of the others around you, you were pretty sure they weren’t going to mind one bit. 

Either Jungkook was honestly oblivious to all the attention or he just didn’t care. He practically beamed as he leaned himself closer to you completely unaware at how breathless he made you. That smile you’d admired during your field trip showed itself beaming and bright. He was so damn pleased with himself his eyes sparked with joy and you wish you could’ve pouted. Maybe found the strength not to care or to wonder if he could see how he affected you. 

You wanted to pout and be in your own bubble, damn it. 

“Don’t worry, Y/N. I don’t think he’ll bother us again.”

Us. 

Those butterflies you’d sworn to yourself you were not feeling towards him began to come to life. Or were they butterflies? You weren’t sure what to call the feeling Jungkook gave you. 

Sure, Jungkook made your heart thunder in your chest like a caged animal. And yea, maybe you swore to yourself there was an attraction there that you couldn’t explain, but that was just your dopamine talking. That didn’t mean the two of you were soulmates or the universe decided to bring you both together by a mess of unseen choices. 

But...when Jungkook looked at you this way it was hard to tell your thundering heart anything else. 

The two of you continued to look at one another. A heartbeat of time passing between you with Jungkook waiting for your reply. You watched the edges of his smile start to wilt as realization set in that you weren’t planning to  reply. No smile or teasing remark was headed his way, and just as fast as he noticed it, determination swiftly replaced the light weighted joy he’d shown moments earlier. 

“Hey, you don’t have to worry. I’m positive he will leave us alone the rest of the class. I promise.”

God, why did he have to make things so difficult? When Jungkook spoke the words, “I promise,” they’d been so earnest. He meant them. Here he was trying to turn the tables and be your knight, instead of you being his. It would have worked, but what he didn’t know was that you weren’t worried about Mr. Choi. Not really. 

No one could tear you down further than you were able to do to yourself. 

He was still waiting for the answer that you would never give. You turned to face forward in your chair and tried to forget the ripple of sadness that moved over his face. The cost of your stubbornness suddenly felt too high. No matter how it made you feel though, you refused to look over in his direction. 

An awkward chasm had built between the two of you. Mostly, well, obviously it was all because of you. You figured Jungkook would eventually stop looking at you. You prayed he would stop. Every time he did it your body became painfully aware of his gaze, and the longing it held for you to acknowledge him. And every time you remained facing front. You no longer could pretend to focus, however, and that seemed to be all the signs Jungkook needed to know you were in some way paying attention.

Your notebook that’d been left unattended on the desk became his private art museum. The doodles started off silly and slowly morphed into small faces and objects that held impressive detail. You tried your best to ignore it; his arm practically took up most of the space on your desk. The angle forced him to shoulder into your space to the point that if you did finally turn to look at him you’d run inches away from his cheek. 

You were doing your best to pay attention to whatever your teacher was doing at the front. Your eyes watched as a wave of hands went up to answer questions you’d never heard. Yours kept sliding back down to the latest doodle he was making. The latest one he was working on had forced Jungkook to move further inland on your notepad. His forearm getting dangerously close to having to rest in your lap. 

It continued like this the remainder of class. For all the effort you’d put in the last half hour of pretending he wasn’t there, Jungkook shattered it within seconds. 

He’d repositioned himself with each new doodle he started. His shoulder wedged itself against yours and his forearm had completely taken up what little space was left on your desk. You were trying very hard to not pay attention to how said forearm was dangerously close to your chest. There was no hiding the redness of your cheeks. 

Without thinking, you whipped your head to look at him and almost yelled. You knew he was close, but nothing prepared you for this.

“Excuse me,” you whispered, voice incredulous. 

Jungkook turned to look at you and...was he pouting? His eyes played up on the childish quality as he turned to you and batted his eyes.

“Can I help you?”

“Ugh, can I help you? Do you need paper or something?”

“I have paper right here. Thanks.”

Jungkook patted the notepad with the end of his pen. Satisfied with his answer he turned his attention back to his latest artistic endeavor. 

“You know this is my desk. Right?”

“I like to think of it more like our desk. Sharing a space like we shared music.”

“Ya, Jungkook. You realize you blackmailed me into using my ipod.”

Jungkook feigned shock. His mouth dropping open and his eyes brows going too high up into his hairline. The entire scene was exaggerated and ridiculous. The scene forced you to roll your lips against your teeth to keep from smiling. The effort it took to hide your grin wasn’t unnoticed by Jungkook, and you couldn’t help but wonder if that’d been his goal all along. 

“Blackmail sounds so crass. I like to think of it as bargaining.”

“So we agree it’s called blackmail, then.” 

The theatrics of his face dropped into a serious stare that left his face completely blank. Void of all emotion except the annoyance that drew a heavy frown from his face. It was stupidly cute and this time you did allow yourself to smile. Your fingers reached out to grab one of his puffed out cheeks and gave it a sweet pinch, like a grandmother, and cooed in his direction. 

“Oooooh Jungkookie, don’t frown. We’ve all gotta be wrong sometimes.” 

He playfully nipped at your hand to make you snatch it away. It took everything in you not to make a sound at his sudden movement. Your mouth hung open in an awkward smile-shout as you brought your handle against your chest. 

“I think you’re misinterpreting the facts here. Maybe you hit your head on a small pebble or something when you fell in the mud.”

“You mean when you pulled me in.”

He shrugged and replied nonchalantly, “I don’t think I recall any force being used yesterday. You just fell on my chest trying to take advantage of me in my time of need.”

Now it was your turn to look deadpanned in his direction. Jungkook didn’t try to hide his wicked smile, however, and the cage of butterflies that were housed in your gut were released all over again. 

“Your appa must be a lawyer. It’d explain why you’re so good at bullshitting.”

“CEO, actually. But I would say you’re close. They are also full of shit.” 

You weren’t sure what to say to this omission about his father. Underneath the sarcasm felt like a heavy chasm that spoke of the death of a relationship. Your curiosity threatened to get the best of you, but you decided to just throw it away. Filing it away inside a little folder you’d made for little known facts about him. 

The bell rang and the mass of bodies in class all began to rise from their seats. All of them eager to rush from the classroom and do whatever plans they’d made to enjoy their little bit of freedom. You were reaching for your bookbag when Jungkook’s hand was just there. A part of you worried he’d decided to play a game of keep away, or something that fit his playful mood, Instead, he placed it down on the desk. 

“Oh, thank you, Jungkook.”

God. Why were you staring? Why was he staring?

The room was still filled with the small display of chaotic teenage energy. Most of them had already filed out of the classroom, while some were still putting things away. Honor students were arguing with the teacher about markings he’d left on papers. Small groups of friends chatting happily as they moved in tight clusters through the door. So much was going on around you, and yet the only person you were aware of was him. 

“You’re welcome. Have a good lunch, Y/N.”

The playful air that’d been around him had completely disappeared. This boy who stood before you now was more reminiscent of when you’d first met than the boy you’d grown to like. What had made him grow so distant?

“You too, Kookie.”

It slipped out. You couldn’t stop yourself. He’d already started to walk away in his retreat. As soon as his pet name you’d given him hit his ears he completely stopped moving. His head whipped around to glance at you with that devilish grin raised high on his cheeks. 

“Kookie? Are you calling me a snack?”

If your eyes could’ve gotten any wider, they would’ve left your skull. The embarrassment was hot on your cheeks and you knew Jungkook would tease you without mercy for the slip up. By the look in his eyes you could tell he was never going to let this go. Not ever. He would be too happy to remind you of this until the day you died. Or until graduation. Whichever came first.

This time you scooped up your bookbag and snatched your book off the desk clutching them to your chest. In your haste to grab them and go, your knee collided with the edge of the desk, but you’d worry about that possible bruise later. You just needed to flee before Jungkook got any closer. 

“No, no. It was an accident.”

“You called me a snack by accident?”

You were backing up towards the safety of the open hallway. Your shoulders shrugging too high and your laugh too high-pitched in your attempt to play it cool.

“No snack nicknames here. It was just a slip of the tongue. I must just be hungry, ya know.”

“Are you hungry for me?”

Oh, he was intolerable sometimes. It didn’t matter how flustered he made you. A part of you knew his endless teasing was growing on you. You liked it, and the sane part of you wondered if you’d gone crazy. 

“Ya, Jungkook-”

“I think you mean, Kookie,” he cut in. 

Jungkook held a single finger up to silence you. He’d stopped moving towards you and let out a laugh as you tried to swat his hand down. He looked so much happier than he did moments ago. That alone made his teasing at your expense worth it. 

“No I mean, Jungkook. It’s the name your parents gave you.” You stated, proud that your voice sounded more stable than you felt. “I’m gonna go eat my lunch now. You should do the same and I’ll...see you later.”

You waited for him to argue. To continue to make comments in passing to keep your face rosy and flushed. He surprised you by just standing there in silence. His smile wide on his face and eyes looking at you like you’d held the moon. A look you weren’t used to and made you unsure how to respond. 

You started to walk back towards the door and found yourself disappointed when he didn’t follow. You sent him an awkward wave as your arms still held onto your things from your desk. Jungkook showed his amusement by giving you a wave in return.

“See you later, Y/N.”

At his words you turned on your heel and headed out towards the courtyard. No longer eager to eat your lunch that you’d packed. Your mind replayed his words and knew, without a doubt, he would keep his word.

—————-

Lunch went by as quickly as it came. Instead of eating your lunch with friends, you’d opted for sulking in the auditorium. Absentmindedly taking small bits off your food as you considered what had happened between Jungkook and you. 

There was flirting there. You may be a little delusional, but you weren’t delusional about this. It was obvious to anyone who witnessed it and yet you tried to deny its existence at every turn.  Of course, you knew why. 

It just didn’t make logical sense. You were two opposites that shouldn’t be in the least bit interested in the other. Well, that didn’t really seem correct when it came to Jungkook. He was attractive to everyone and probably even inanimate objects. But you...you just couldn’t see yourself that way. You’d only ever had one relationship in your life and it had been short-lived and in the third grade. 

Throwing what little was left of your sandwich back inside it’s little brown coffin, you removed yourself from your spot. A huff left you as you reached out to pick up your mess and started to hop back down the steps one-by-one. 

You weren’t sure what walking around was going to do. For the hundredth time since this day started, you were lost in your own head. The only thing you knew for certain was that you’d hoped to run into him again. A thought came to you that maybe, just this day, he’d shown up in the school's cafeteria. 

You could think of a million excuses for why you’d need to go into the cafeteria and it wouldn’t be weird. Just the thought of not coming off weird, while most certainly being weird, made you beam at your own creativity. 

You’d reached the last step and we’re crossing the field when you noticed, on the other side, the very boy you were looking for. He was alone and sitting under the shade of the only tree next to the amphitheater. His back against the bark and a knee drawn up to give his notepad a place to perch. Whatever he was writing, drawing, or formulating held his interest and refused to let him look up. 

All your previous bravado deflated in a second. It would be harder to deny you weren’t actively seeking him out if you went to him now. But, who said that you wanted too? 

Grabbing the strap of your book bag tight, you started back on your mission. Your legs made quick work across the field. It wasn’t until there was only a few feet left between you that he looked up. His brow still furrowed in tight creases of concentration as he decided if you were a friend or foe. Your feet almost tripped over themselves when he smiled at you. 

“Y/N!” He called happily. “What brings you over here?”

“I came looking for my snack.”

The surprise on his face made your bold choice of a response worth it. Jungkook, being who he was, quickly recovered and set his notebook and pencil down beside him. He placed his arms casually on his propped up leg and leaned forward as if he was about to tell you a secret. 

“Well, you found me. Why did you come looking for me? Really.”

You tried to think quickly of what to say. The idea of telling him the truth, that you’d just wanted to see him, felt painfully honest and might press him to ask for you to explain. How could you explain that in the short time you’d met him he was both the most interesting and infuriating man you’d ever met. But he was also the most beautiful, and had a delicate softness under his hard exterior that you were growing to love. He was basically the perfect description of the onion from Shrek. 

An idea clicked in your head and your hands quickly moved inside your bag and produced another brown bag. 

“I wanted to come see if you’d eaten. I had some spare kimchi rice ball’s my omma made.”

You extended the bag out to him. Your eyes locked together as you waited for him to either accept it or deny it. Jungkook surprised you by leaning forward and taking it gently from you. It took some effort, but he crossed his legs -his bad one in an awkward position - and plopped the bag down between his legs. 

You moved to sit beside him in the grass and took your book bag off your shoulder and into your lap. You watched as he moved to open the bag and peered cautiously inside. 

“It’s not a bomb,” you chided. 

“I never know with you.”

You rolled your eyes with a smile spreading like wildfire across your lips. Jungkook was so charismatic it felt inevitable and fighting against it was futile. He took a large bite of the rice ball and practically swooned. His eyes had fallen shut and a ridiculous chanting of endless “Mhm’s” had started rising up around you. 

“Should I leave you two alone?”

Jungkook’s eyes snapped open and for a moment you were worried maybe you did pull him out of some weird food ritual. His eyes were blank and then, all at once, he was back to being his usual animated self. The hand that held the rice ball shaking in your direction before shoving what was left inside his mouth. 

“This is unbelievably delicious.” He mumbled around his food. “You said your omma made these?”

“Yup!”

You’d said it in English just to dramatically pop the P at the end. Extending out your own kind of dramatics to match Jungkook’s. You leaned your hands back into the grass and noticed Jungkook watch your every move as you did. 

“Is your omma married?”

Your face fell into a deadpan stare as you replied, “Seriously? Of course her and my appa are still married, you creep.”

“If you can cook like your omma, Y/N I’m willing to lend you my amazing tutoring services. All for the low price of making things as delicious as this.”

He was already mid-way through shoving the second rice ball in his mouth. His head tilted back to drop it down. A piece of rice must have dislodged itself from its balled shape, because he erupted in a coughing fit. You couldn’t help but laugh as you handed him your water. 

“I think I’ll steer clear of rice treats. Just to make sure you don’t kill yourself.”

Jungkook was about to lift the bottle up to his lips and stopped. His eyes falling on you with a playful glare. You held your hands up in mock surrender as you leaned forward. Your hands clap together to get pieces of grass and soil from your hands. 

While he drank the water you’d offered up the two of you fell into companionable silence. You didn’t mind waiting and Jungkook was happy that you did. When he’d finished with the bottle, he set it down beside him. His hand moving like a flopping fish in your direction to make you give him something that you’d had no idea he’d asked for. 

“Come on. Let’s see your math homework.” 

“For what?”

“To start your tutoring. Duh.”

You hated how cute he’d made the word sound. The way his lips smiled around it and left him beaming at you like a little kid on Christmas. 

“Can we pass? We just left the class and I hate math. A lot.”

Jungkook tsked you but didn’t look disappointed. 

“You can’t get better at something if you give up on it. Luckily for you, you’ve got the best person in the subject to tutor you.”

“For a fee,” you pointed out. 

“All the best things come with a price. I’m most definitely one of them. Now. Book.”

His hand movements were more controlled now. His fingers simply waved once -twice- for you to hurry it up and place what he’d asked in his hand. You really didn’t want any part of this. The thought was sweet, but when you said you hated math you meant it. So yeah, maybe you were grumbling a little as you reached inside your book bag and taking a little longer than was necessary to hand it over. 

Jungkook took it from you in one smooth motion and had it open to the spot previously in class. All your homework problems you’d left unfinished glaring against the white of the page. His eyes were already scanning over what little problems you’d written down. A clicking noise from his closed mouth reminding you why exactly you hadn’t finished more of it. The reason was sitting right in front of you. 

His hand flicked back out and he held it open. His eyes never lifted off the page as he demanded, “Pencil.”

“What the heck? Why am I supplying everything.”

“Cause I’m supplying myself,” he shot back. His hands taking the pencil you handed over to him. “Plus, I also can’t seem to find any in my bag.” 

“You didn’t even look.”

Jungkook gave a graceful shrug. His attention was fully engrossed in the problems. You weren’t ready for how cute he looked. How adorable those concentration creases in his forehead made him look, even deadly serious, with his fingers tapping the pencil absentmindedly on the paper. When he figured out what was missing from the equation he quickly erased and reconfigured everything on the page. 

You were staring intently at him, both because his angle’s were ridiculously handsome but also, the way the sun fell down on him here, peaking through the trees, felt like magic. It was hard to believe the universe was more than just molecules and that luck was thrown out randomly. If it was, maybe you’d caught some. 

Your thoughts were running wild and your concentration was no longer in the safe zone. Maybe that’s why when he finally looked up from the notebook and found you staring he’d smiled. Not his teasing one. Or the condescending either. This smile was soft like a secret, and directed only at you. \

“See something you like?”

His voice was gentle in his playfulness. As if he wanted to take the cautionary approach in case you were spooked. 

“Maybe I do.”

A smile of your own spread to match his and Jungkook wasn’t surprised. He was just happy, and it was a lovely sight to see. He looked away from you with his hand moving up to smooth out the hair on the back of his neck. He flicked the pencil down on the notebook and brought it forward for you to see. 

“Let’s get back to this. I’ll be honest with you. It’s pretty bad. You missed a whole line on the third problem that left you with an incomplete answer. Not to mention,” he lifted up the notebook and motioned towards the whole page, “Where is all the rest of the homework?”

Jungkook’s voice was filled with the beginnings of laughter. Not specifically towards you, but just the blatant fact you did not care. You gave him your best nonchalant shrug. In reality, you did care. It bothered you it wasn’t finished. 

Your fingers were digging in the grass and ripping some of it up and throwing it out into the field. 

“I had a hard time concentrating last night. Plus, if I’m being honest math has always been the hardest subject for me.”

“And that is why I’m going to help you.”

“For a fee,” you reminded him. 

“I’ll teach you the easiest way I know how to do these and I promise you, you’ll be flying through these problems in no time.”

The sincerity in his voice was evident. Jungkook really believed it and he wanted you to believe it too. You just couldn’t understand why and you found yourself speaking your mind. 

“Why are you wanting to help me?”

It was his turn to shrug his shoulders. His face went blank as he looked at you one last time before he looked away. Whatever he was looking at he wasn’t really seeing. He just needed someplace else to look than the person he was talking to you. You did it plenty of times yourself. 

Whatever he’d decided on to say had caused his shoulders to square. Determined that whatever he needed to say he would make sure it meant something. 

“I like spending time with you.”

The smile you’d worn completely shattered as you stared at him. The butterflies rushed up and up until they trapped themselves in your throat. Jungkook’s admission was basically three words dropped away from just saying he liked you. 

This surprising admission should’ve been enough to make yourself not care who you saw walking. Or care when he stopped, his small mob with him, and start gesturing at his imaginary watch. His fingers rubbing together for money owed. 

It was worse when Jungkook looked back and took notice. Even worse when he looked back at you with questions swirling in his eyes. 

“Everything okay?”

Your eyes looked down to the safety of your hands. The way they were helplessly fidgeting back in the grass and tearing it apart like a miniature tantrum was brewing inside you. You hated that after all this time, you let Lee Kwon upset you by making you feel embarrassed about your dad. That he felt the need to tell everyone the business deal between his father and yours. How every time he told it he’d turned him more and more into a villain of his own misfortune. 

Without a reason why you took back your notebook from Jungkook and shoved it inside your bag. You were ready to leave. You didn’t want to explain, but you knew Jungkook wouldn’t let you just leave without one. 

He reached out and his hand gently wrapped around your wrist to stop you. There was no force. Nothing that hinted that he would keep you there if you didn’t want to be kept. Looking at him felt harder. His genuine worry almost threatened to let the tears from your frustration spill forward. 

“Hey, Y/N, what’s wrong?”

You shook your head. Your vision dragging away from him and back to the retreating back of the sociopath, Lee Kwon. 

You didn’t try to shake him off. You actually felt comforted by his worrisome touch. The way he leaned in closer as if he would pull you into his arms at any moment. As much as you wanted that to happen, you knew it wouldn’t happen. A deep sigh had built up in your chest and you released it while you looked back at him. 

“Look. Eventually, I know you’re going to hear about it: my dad, I mean.”

“That’s kind of odd high school kids would talk about someone’s appa.”

“You and me both,” you agreed. “But Kwon’s dad is a banker who doesn’t believe in client confidentiality. So he tells his son about his day over dinner and-“

“And he decides to bring it to school to make your life miserable,” Jungkook finished for you. 

He understood and didn’t need you to simplify it anymore. His hand left your arm and you suddenly found yourself missing his comforting touch. It was still there, that comfort, in the way his eyes softened and he leaned in intent to listen to whatever you needed to get off your chest. You appreciated his attention, but also hated it at the same time. 

“What’s your Appa’s thing?”

God. He did understand. Maybe just a little too well for your liking. 

“Gambling. It started when I was in the seventh grade. At first it wasn’t anything too crazy. He’d always been able to even it out. But then he became obsessed with the idea of winning big. Kept betting on things we couldn’t afford to lose. Eventually, he bet too high and ended up losing the business he and my mom built together and our house. They had to pay the bank back.”

“A bank this dude’s Appa works at.”

“Correct. My Appa...he isn’t a bad man. He’s paid his debt and hasn’t gambled since. What good is it for me or anyone else to make him feel bad for the rest of his life?”

“I don’t get it. Why does that have to do with you, though?”

You’d wondered the same exact thing half of your adolescent life. You shrugged and looked at Jungkook wondering if maybe he’d be able to make sense of it better than you could. 

“Twelve year old boys enjoy making up stories. First it was that we became so poor we lived with pigs. That's why I smelled.”

You put air quotations around smelled and Jungkook practically howled with laughter. You tried your best to show no emotion, but could feel the corner of your lips threatening to curl into a smile. 

“He probably said it because you didn’t know how to wash back then and, judging from earlier, I still don’t think you do.”

You moved to playfully shove at his shoulder. A scoff of laughter leaving you even though you told yourself you wouldn’t. Jungkook was waiting for you to make a move and when you did he easily grabbed a hold of you. The feeling of intimacy, just like yesterday in the mud, was swimming back to the surface. 

Your eyes looked up into his with your laughter being met with a wide grin. The way he was looking at you now made you believe in fairytales and left your lips aching to be kissed. 

Before either of you could decide what to do next, the bell for the end of lunch sounded. You could hear it going off all around you, but still the two of you stayed holding each other. Your bodies close enough that if he wanted to make a move all Jungkook needed was to lean down. To say your heart dropped a little when he moved away was an understatement. 

You focused on getting up from the grass. Your hands patting down your uniform as you struggle to find something not so awkward to say. You wanted to sound confident. You wanted to sound like you weren’t affected by him at all. 

“Well, I’ll see you around.”

God, you sounded awkward. You turned to start heading to your next period. You closed your eyes tight and mouthed, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” You’d gotten a few feet away when you heard him call to you. 

You turned to look back at him and found him still standing under the tree. His hands in his pockets and his eyes solely on you. 

“Would you let me walk you home?”

Did he really have to ask? You’d let him walk you to the edge of a volcano. You didn’t say that, however. You wanted to play it cool, but on the inside you were screaming. 

“I’d like that.”

When you turned back around to make your way to class, the memory of how his face had brightened at your reply, stayed with you. You couldn’t wait for the day to end. 

_________

True to his word Jungkook waited for you after school. You couldn’t help looking for him over the countless shoulders as you walked with the sea of students towards the entrance. The hole in the pit of your stomach opened back up from the underlying dreadful thought. That he wouldn't show up. You’d be left standing there waiting for him forever. But Jungkook continued to prove your pessimism wrong. 

The closer you got to the school’s gate, you were able to spot him instantly. He was leaning coolly against the gate. His bag at his feet and his cane positioned strategically out of view. If anyone just casually walked up, they would’ve never been able to tell he’d needed one. Maybe that was why he’d done it. 

He looked to be searching for someone in every face that passed him. It came to an end the minute his roaming eyes found you. No longer did he appear cool and composed. His body became animated with what you could only explain as a giddiness at your oncoming presence.

By the time you reached him, Jungkook was wearing his backpack on his shoulder and his cane in his hand. He was standing and waiting for you. The happiness at being next to you was intoxicating and you could only hope you looked the same. 

“It felt like I was waiting forever,” he admitted. 

The two of you started in sync out the gate and turned left onto the main road.

“It felt like an eternity just to get to you. I have Mrs. Chun’s chemistry class for the last period. The classroom is pretty far.”

“Mhm, like on a planet far far away.”

Your eyes rolled up to look at him. The affection you found in the warmth of his eyes was startling, but not a surprise. 

Your mom used to tell you to always be careful with smiling. It caused laugh lines. It helped make crows feet. That smiling was a woman’s secret enemy she never knew about when it came to aging. She told you over and over to be careful who or what you wasted smiles on. Smiling up at him now, Jungkook was definitely worth it just to see him respond with his own. 

“Don’t be so dramatic. It’s only, like, one planet away.” 

A soft hush of laughter left him as he looked away. His gaze roaming around the street signs and their multiple names before looking back at you. 

“Are we going the right way to your place? I just realized I never even asked for your address.”

“Does it matter? I mean, with your leg and all.” You hated yourself for spoiling the moment by bringing it up. You knew it was a touchy subject when it came to his leg for Jungkook. So you weren’t surprised to see that spark of warmth fade ever so slightly from his face. His smile wilted at the edges of his lips before it all but disappeared. “You know I’m sorry I said anything. I shouldn’t have. I mean obviously you know yourself and your limits. You wouldn’t have asked if you weren’t able to do it.”

You were rambling. You were fidgeting and waving your arms around while you talked, because why not? You were doing everything else besides hyperventilating at this point. All you knew was that you felt like a jerk for even bringing it up. When all you wanted was to know he was okay. 

You were so lost in the space inside your head and worrying that you didn’t notice him laughing at you. You were mid-arm swing. Inhaling for another round of mouth babble to start asking for forgiveness when he waved for you to stop. A finger tip landing on your lips to quiet the words in your throat by shocking you into silence.

“You really don’t have to apologize so much, Y/N. It’s alright. I understand why you would ask.”

You were tempted to lick his finger away, but it felt too intimate. But so was a finger on the lips. Before you could decide your next move from your internal dilemma, Jungkook solved it for you. His finger detaching from your lips as quickly as it’d come.

“No, you don’t. I’m just worried about you. I know I should trust you to know yourself better, but-“ you did an over exaggerated shrug as you finished: “I’m a worrier.” 

“I’m flattered, I have you to worry over me.”

You knew he was teasing you and you couldn’t have been happier. You preferred it to making him sad. Plus, he was back to looking at you like you controlled the stars and oh, what a wonderful look it was.

“You should be. I’ve only got so much extra space up here.”

You tapped your head for added effect and were rewarded with a soft laugh that was followed up by a smile. God, you could get used to this. 

“I guess I need to work harder to take up more space.”

“Please, no. Let’s not do that. I need my sanity.”

You couldn’t believe you were doing so well at flirting. Usually, your sarcasm won out and you resorted to awkward winking, but this was definitely an improvement. 

“I’m not sure you have much of that left either,” he joked. 

You tried to hide your laughter with a scoff. You knew you were failing miserably at being offended. Your mouth fighting too hard to ward off a smile as you playfully bumped your shoulder into his arm. Jungkook was ready for you with his cane digging into the sidewalk to give him extra stability. 

“Ya, if I do finally go crazy it’ll be your fault, specifically.” 

“I think you’d have a hard time proving that in court. My counter argument would be pretty persuasive.” 

You looked at him in shock. 

“Court? Wow...that escalated quickly.”

Jungkook nodded his reply. He stopped in front of a bookstore and pointed at a manga in the window. You weren’t too familiar with the title, but it's a cover you’d seen plenty of. 

“It would happen as quickly as an infection from a zombie’s bite. It would seem all slow until suddenly you jumped up and tried to eat me.” 

You couldn’t keep the amusement off your face as you glanced at him and back down to the manga. A part of you wondering if it was one he’d read before or just wanted to use to make his point. 

“Question: why are we together during a zombie outbreak?”

“Isn’t it obvious? It’s because I’ll be walking you home. I’ll try and save you and while feeling all heroic about it, I won’t even realize you’d been bitten until it’s too late.”

The two of you moved away from the bookstore window and began to walk back down the sidewalk. Your mind trying to dissect what he was trying to say, but all it left you with was imagining a zombie version of you trying to take a bite out of him. 

“You must watch too much Walking Dead.”

“It’s a good show,” he shrugged. 

“Did you know that there’s actually a fungus out there that’s sort of like a zombie infection. It’s called Ophiocordyceps. It basically infects the host and within nine days of infection it takes control of the host's body movements.”

You were still walking and looking around while you spoke. Your fingers running gently over a row of gardenia’s that were planted in carefully placed pots in front of someone’s home. You were aware Jungkook had left your side by the sudden coldness of his absence. You turned to look for him and found him standing a foot away from you. A mixture of astonishment and amusement etched on his face. 

“Why do you know something like that? Actually, how do you know something like that?”

His eyes were dancing with curiosity as he moved to fall back into step beside you. 

“Let’s just say I like to read. I like strange things and facts. And science is full of both facts and strange things.”

With each small statement you held up a finger. When you ended on the third and final small fact about yourself, you wiggled all three fingers at him. The motion earned you a giant smile that only seemed to grow wider as his head shook slightly back and forth. 

“You are the strangest girl.”

“How am I strange?”

“You just told me about a body snatching fungus,” he chuckled. “What other girl is going to do that?”

Jungkook had a point. A very strong point. For all your new found confidence when it came to him, you couldn’t keep the heat from rushing to your face. Or the back of your hands from trying to hide it. 

“I would tell you to stop being embarrassed but it’s cute when you blush.” 

The two of you came to a complete stop at the crosswalk. The red light blinking to tell you two it wasn’t safe to cross. It felt like a weird metaphor for this moment in your life. 

Stop! Do not keep staring back at him as if he strung every star in the sky. Stop! Don’t continue to entertain the thought that he looked like he wanted to kiss you or that you desperately wanted to kiss him back. Stop! Even though you already knew it was too late. 

You had plans. It’d all been strategically mapped out in your head until you could read it forwards and backwards to yourself. Do your best to graduate high enough in the percentage range to get into a decent college. Get a degree for a job, it didn’t matter what it was, that made enough money to help your parents. For all your careful planning, none of it had included him and yet, the universe had you both standing at a stoplight looking at each other like there couldn’t be any other reality where you weren’t meant to end up right here. Standing at this exact light and looking at one another like no one else existed. 

Luckily, the light changed signaling for you to begin to cross. The mass of bodies that had accumulated behind you began to push you both forward and, reluctantly, broke your gaze free from him. Your brain was scrambling to pick up a conversation you weren’t sure how to resurrect. Your mind too busy daydreaming all the scenarios you would’ve taken in different realities if you were braver. Clearing your throat, you did your best to wipe the thought clean and focus on your current reality.

“If it makes you feel better,” you started your body turning to consider him as you spoke, “the study was only ever done on the tropical ants that resided in the forest. The actual effects and what it could do to humans has never been studied. Yet. But I’m willing to bet it would take longer than nine days for it to take hold of a grown adult's nervous system and larger batches.”

He was looking at you in inspired mock horror. You weren’t sure whether it was a good thing or a bad thing. Or if your unusual fact telling about zombie fungus had completely killed the mood. You got your answer in an excited hush of, “Holy shit it’s like you’re writing your own super villain backstory.” 

A smile erupted on your face as you playfully rolled your eyes away from him. It was hard to miss the mischievous glint in his eyes or the way his whole face still swam with the playfulness that lurked underneath his teasing. Jungkook was so alive. A force that required you to hang on or else you would get swept up in him without even realizing it’d happen. 

You wondered if this is what falling in love felt like. 

“I would make a terrible villain. I’m too clumsy,” you stated. Your weak attempt at downplaying yourself being met with a stern look. 

“How clumsy are we talking?”

“Hmm, I would say, ‘Kronk giving the llama potion to Kuzco,’ kind of clumsy.”

A hiss of air whistled between Jungkook’s teeth. A mock look of worry on his face as his hands moved to reposition his bag. 

“Can we call that clumsy, though?”

“What else would it be?” You asked. 

You could feel the lines grouping together in your forehead just trying to figure out what he was getting at. Jungkook didn’t seem to be in any rush to answer you. The two of you walking a few feet before he must have decided you’d waited long enough for him to reply. 

“I always thought Kronk was stupid throughout the whole movie, but really, he was just a good person. He’s a good guy tasked to do a bad thing and he just wants to make people happy. Even if it means doing the wrong thing.”

You wanted to ask if maybe he was talking more about himself than The Emperor’s New Groove at this point. He faced forward with his brow creased in deep thought and whatever it was that held his thoughts didn’t appear to be anything good. 

“Or,” you started, voice light enough to drag him out of his head, “it’s just a kids movie.”

Sure, Jungkook was looking at you, but he didn’t seem to actually see you. Somewhere inside his head, he was reenacting or seeing something that ate up all the sunshine that lived in his bones. It felt silly to feel a sense of panic about something that might not even be true. And yet, you couldn’t stop the awful thought that sadness was trying to make a home inside his soul. 

Without giving it another thought you reached up and pretended to wipe away a pretend rogue eyelash from his cheek. The suddenness of your fingers brushing on his skin jolted him from wherever his thoughts had held him hostage and back into the present. His eyes darted around your face and his own hand came up to gently take yours. 

“Sorry.” Your words came out breathy as you struggled not to focus on how he was practically holding your hand. “There was an eyelash. The wind must have blown it away.”

The earlier sadness that’d hollowed out his eyes was gone. What replaced it was one of knowing you weren’t telling the truth. His head tilted slightly down to inspect your empty finger of the proof you knew your words didn’t have whose eyes sparked with his usual teasing and something else. Something that left a different kind of heat flooding your cheeks. 

“I’m sure there was.”

Reluctantly, you removed your hand from his and continued to walk. It only took him a couple seconds to fall effortlessly into step beside you making you wonder if his leg was as injured as it seemed. 

A warm silence swelled around you as you continued to walk. A comfortable pace setting between you as he looked in the windows of every store you passed in between the changing streets. He never once asked if you were getting close to your home or how much farther it might be. It was like the moment on the back of the bus. The two of you enjoyed that the other was there without ever feeling the need to say it.

But you knew it was soon coming to an end. In only a few blocks, you’d be home and your fairytale moment would end. You were struggling on how to break this, more to yourself than Jungkook, when you noticed he pulled a Nikon camera from the side of his bag. He was squinting through the lens and taking photos of something up ahead. Of the landscape or the people and buildings that framed it you weren’t sure. 

He must have sensed your silent question as he snapped a few more quick photos before turning to acknowledge you. 

“Y/N, I have a serious question for you.”

It was hard to keep the amusement off your face as you both came to a stop. The place felt random, but it was anything but that to Jungkook. Whatever he saw in this space you both inhabited must have felt like magic to him. 

“Okay. Shoot.”

“Do you think we have enough time for me to take some photos?”

It felt like such an odd request. Why should anyone have to ask to do something that they loved? Jungkook didn’t fully say he loved doing it, but no one spent that much money on a nice camera if it wasn’t something they enjoyed doing. The look on his face was just an added bonus of proving your answer meant something. One that made you wonder why he felt like he needed your permission at all. And then it hit you: he wanted to stay in your company while he did it. 

You considered teasing him, but he looked too vulnerable standing there. You weren’t even sure if he was breathing. A pleading in his eyes that reminded you of a child asking a mother to go on just one more ride before they were forced to go home. You considered giving him the bad news that you had more than homework to do when you arrived home. But that could come another day. On this day, with him, you could spare an hour just to make him happy.

Instead of coming right out and letting him know you’d made up your mind, you decided to play coy. A soft, “Hmm,” hummed around you as you looked everywhere but him. Your index finger tapping on your lips for dramatic flare.

"Ok," You shrugged. "I think I have some free time I could spare."

His eyes squinted in question as you moved to stand in front of him. The movement simply to let a couple go by in peace, but somehow placed you closer in front of him. Jungkook’s gaze was roaming your face to find an answer to a question he hadn’t yet asked. 

“You planned on saying yes this whole time, didn’t you. You were just trying to make me suffer waiting for you to answer.”

You gasped in pretend shock and did your best not to smile at his accusations. By the growing smile on his face you knew you were failing miserably. 

“Me?! I would never do such a thing.”

“You’re secretly a sadist!”

Jungkook’s smile only widened as a scoff of disbelief passed from your lips. Your own smile grew to match his own when his hands lifted up his camera. Seconds later the sound of the shutter clicked and you felt your soul leave your body. The earlier playfulness was swiftly swept in your own dark cloud and the idea you probably looked hideous in that photo. 

“Oh god, Jungkook delete it,” you pleaded. 

Your hands were reaching out to grab tightly at this shirt. Your fingers curled in the white fabric until there was a small chance you could tear holes. The camera in question was being held far from your reach. His hand easily held it above his shoulder as he used one hand to steady you against him. You’d invaded his space without even realizing, but you had no time to be embarrassed. Not when he had a picture of you forever saved on that camera. 

“Why would I delete it?”

He was his usual amused self you could tell, but he wasn’t egging you on. His question was out of curiosity. His own eyes brimming with it as you considered keeping one hand tightly wound in his shirt and the other to jump up and reach for the camera. 

“Because Jungkook I’m not cute. You’ll be lucky if it doesn’t ruin the camera.”

All his earlier playfulness drained from his face and what was left made you instantly feel like you were about to be scolded. His hand that had firmly planted itself on your hip was achingly apparent now as his fingers gripped you closer to him. Your own awareness at how close you actually were to his chest made your lips feel dry. Your tongue flicked out to wet them and god, it took everything in you not to focus on the fact his eyes had followed the movement. 

“Y/N, why would you say that? You shouldn’t let anyone talk down about you, and you shouldn’t do it to yourself either. You’re beautiful.”

He spoke like it was a fact. A statement that not just the two of you knew, but the universe did too. And what were you supposed to say back? While you were held captive to the thought he was still looking from you to your lips. The determination for you to understand his words and believe them setting soft lines in his face. You tried to keep looking at him, but under his watchful gaze you couldn’t keep yourself from fidgeting. Your eyes moved down the line of his body until it landed on the tops of your shoes. 

You weren’t sure what to say back. Thank you didn’t fit here. It didn’t feel like a moment where he was trying to boost your confidence the way a friend did. This felt more like someone who noticed something in you while you hadn’t been looking. 

So instead of saying anything remotely clever back you began to dislodge yourself from him. Your hands releasing their hold on his shirt and forcing his hand off of your hip. Standing there with only inches between you, your body was achingly aware that his hand was gone. It’s weight leaving a burning of longing to have it back forced your hands into your pockets and your body turning away from him. You waited for him to start moving back down the road. The motion forced him to either join you or stay where he was. 

“We should get going before we run out of time.”

You hated yourself for dismissing him. For not being bolder like you’d promised yourself earlier in the day. It would’ve been the perfect time to thank him. To tell him how you were pretty sure there wasn’t a soul on earth more attractive than him, but that what made him beautiful is what he refused to let people see. The soft tone of his voice still singing along to the songs on the back of the bus had ended up being an unspoken lullaby when you’d gone to sleep. 

A part of you considered turning on your heel and telling him this. To tell him that you saw him; actually saw him for who he was and not who he felt like he needed to be. But you just kept moving forward and weren’t surprised when Jungkook found a steady rhythm back beside you. 

The both of you stayed quiet. This time it felt more forced than the easiness of earlier. Like the two of you had so many missed starts at creating a conversation that neither of you could understand why it ended.

You watched him as he focused on the area around him. His camera training on an old couple who sat waiting for the next bus. The husband had clutched his wife’s arm close to his side. In his hands he was peeling what appeared to be an orange and with each freshly peeled slice, he gave one to her and one to himself. No one knew what they were conversing about, but it didn’t matter. To them, they were the only two people there. The wholesomeness of the moment made you wonder what they were like back in their youth. 

You listened to the flutter of the shutter click repeatedly. His hand twisting on the lens to bring it in and out of focus, while he himself remained deadly focused on capturing their moment in time. You were curious how the photos would turn out in the end and wished there was a way to show them how their love translated on film. 

You were in the middle of watching Jungkook turn his attention to a couple birds inside a cherry blossom when he spoke.

“Thank you for agreeing to walk with me while I do this.”

“You don’t have to thank me, Jungkook.”

A sad smile curled his lips as he dropped his camera down in front of him. His thumb skimmed over the buttons to quickly go through what he’d previously taken. The last one he landed on made his entire face light up and you felt a pang of jealousy at what it could be. How you wish he would look at you like that. 

“Maybe, but I feel like I do. Ever since my accident, my appa hasn’t been able to force me into things. For once, I get to just do what I want. Sucks it only had to cost me a friend and a leg to get some freedom.”

Your feet had carried you to the next stop sign. The sudden halt in moving forced you to look at him, really look at Jungkook, like you’d never seen him before. 

He wasn’t looking at you now. His ears a screaming red while his fingers danced over every part of the camera. His eyes roaming over its edges and flicking too fast through pictures to actually even be looking at them. For the first time since you’d met him Jungkook was scared to look at you. Scared for what you might see if you did. 

Looking at him now, you couldn’t have been happier to indulge him. You’d indulge him for the rest of your life if he’d let you. 

“Well, I’m happy to be of service.”

You mentally smacked yourself at your choice of words. Jungkook, however, was backing to his beaming self as he finally glanced in your direction. His eyeing ate up your embarrassment as it was your turn to face forward. Your feet hopping in place as you waited for the light to flash it was okay to walk. 

“I’m supposed to be at physical therapy right now.”

“Wait, what?”

The light was flickering finally for you to all move. Your feet moved to carry you forward unintentionally, just to keep with the flow of traffic, as Jungkook gave you a small shrug for an answer. 

“Did you say you were supposed to be at physical therapy?”

Another shrug and another long pause with no answer. It seemed he had been waiting for you to round the corner onto a quieter pedestrian free street before he replied, “After school. I have appointments almost everyday and I never go.” 

“But why? It’s meant to help you get better, isn’t it?”

“Get better to do what, exactly?” He huffed. Jungkook’s entire body took on a broodier tone. His cane practically dug small holes with each press into the pavement. “Who even says that I can get better?”

“Well, doctors for one,” you pointed out. “I’m sure they wouldn’t have signed you up for it if they didn’t believe you could get better.” 

“If I was going to get better it would’ve happened already.”

It felt like walking on eggshells. This side of Jungkook was the boy you’d met on his first day of class. His guarded demeanor up on high alert, as he kept his gaze stoically forward and his chin held high. 

“You’re not an idiot, Jungkook. You know injuries take time to heal from. It doesn't just magically happen overnight.”

“Who says that I want to get better?”

The coldness in his words forced your legs to stop working. Your feet were unable to move as he continued to push on ahead of you. His own movements became slower now as the long walk was beginning to take its toll on his leg. He knew you weren’t beside him anymore and still he tried to keep pushing forward, before eventually he had no other choice but to turn around. 

The look on his face was as defiant as ever. Underneath that defiance was a sadness so raw you only wanted to reach out and hold him. If just to remind him that he was seen and that his pain mattered.

That’s when the realization hit you.

“Unless you feel like you deserve this.”

The stone façade he’d worked so hard to create in the past few minutes began to chip. His eyes being the first to show by the soft uprising of tears that you were right. Somewhere deep inside Jungkook believed that he deserved what happened to him. That this was punishment for losing a friend at his own hands, even if it wasn’t his fault to begin with. 

The tears that threatened to spill never did, but they were there. They floated dangerously at the surface of Jungkook’s control and he refused to let go. The rawness of his pain hit you and all you wanted was to help ease it. You weren’t sure if he would accept any kind of affection, even in a small hug. So your only option was to move closer to him. As close as he would allow without pushing you away. 

With each step you could see his jaw clenching tighter; pulsing like he was fighting from saying something wicked to send you skirting back. He was just as afraid of what you were about to do as you were at being the one to do it. 

When the tips of your shoes nudged against his you drew your eyes up until they landed on his. A spark of something; fear or uncertainty, flashed in his eyes. Was he expecting you to be cruel? To yell at him to stop being a child and to grow up? How much had he already heard those words shouted by adults? How long had he been standing there like this, in a world full of grief, and no one there to pull him out to breathe before the next wave suffocated him once more. 

You weren’t sure if it was you or if what you said would matter, but it was important he heard it. It was important he knew that this was okay too. 

“You got to forgive yourself sometime, Jungkook.”

The words themselves were simple. Simple and spoken between you as if there was a secret meant only for the two of you to hear. All you really wanted was for him to feel the sincerity of your words for him to know it was okay. Okay to feel sad, unsure, and helpless at times when all the world felt against you. It was okay to not know your first steps and okay to take those first steps when you were ready. Eventually, we needed to forgive, if only to give ourselves the chance to heal and move on. 

His gaze was still misty with unshed tears and still they refused to fall. The pain and defiance that had turned his features harsh began to soften. All that hardness he struggled to keep himself in and others out was beginning to fade and the only thing left was him. All that sunshine that you’d seen lived in his smile and echoed in his laughter that crinkled in the corners of his eyes. The way he cared for others and making them feel cared for. The softness of his singing and the way he eagerly filmed people at their most vulnerable: at their most beautiful. 

It was at this moment you felt your universe shift and tip until it realigned itself. With your fingers back to holding the edges of his shirt it took everything in you not to close those final inches and hug him. Jungkook closed that distance for you instead. 

His lips crashing down on your cheeks causing a soft squeak of surprise to push free from your lips. A chuckle came as he came back into view and your mind struggled to comprehend what happened. 

It wasn’t a kiss on the lips but…

“Did you just kiss my cheek?”

Your hand was up to the aforementioned spot. A wicked smile wiping away all of his sadness until you weren’t sure if it had been real at all or if you’d imagined it. 

“I could kiss your lips if you’d like that instead.” 

If your cheeks could get any hotter you could’ve fried food on them. You felt a surge of disappointment when Jungkook took a reluctant step back from you as his eyes dropped to check the time on his phone.

“As much as I hate to say this: I have to go.”

“All of the sudden you have to go,” you huffed. 

Your words felt brave, but inside your heart was thundering wildly against your chest. 

“I could stay if you want?”

Smoother than expected, Jungkook slid his way back to you. His chest bumping against you making you lose your footing just enough that it forced you to grab on to his shirt. Jungkook’s own hand had moved behind your back to steady you and bring you closer to him all at once. 

You playfully smacked his chest and earned a soft laugh from him. Unfortunately, you found yourself peeling away from him. Your hands grasping at the strap of your bag to keep them from reaching back out for him. 

“Not a chance.”

Your reply earned a playful pout from him as he started walking backwards away from you. 

“I’ll remember that, Y/N!”

You rolled your eyes and turned around to start walking the rest of the way home. You didn’t get more than a few feet before he called back to you. Your eyes found him instantly in a crowd of people that continued to pass in front of him.

“I forgot to ask: what’s your number!”

He held up a pen expecting you to come back to him and write it down presumably on his arm or hand. You didn’t see any paper and could only assume. You knew it was all just a ploy to get you to come to him. The knowledge evident by the wicked grin on his face. 

“You’re a math wiz, right?” Jungkook was perplexed for a second before you started reciting your number as loud as you were willing to shout it. The wind blew it away as he no doubt struggled to listen. 

“Wow! What a way to play dirty.”

“If it’s meant to be you’ll figure it out.”

And maybe that was true. Maybe you both had a chance to write your own love story like from the movies and shows you used to watch with your mom. Like Rose and Jack from Titanic or Ross and Rachel...okay...maybe more like Chandler and Monica. Or maybe you were an idiot and should’ve just gone and wrote it down. It was too late now as he was already on the other side of the street. 

You were ready to walk the rest of the way kicking yourself for being so lame when you heard him call your name again. When you turned you didn’t expect him to be trotting across the road. You didn’t expect him to stop in front of you and give you another quick kiss on the cheek, this one gentler than before, with every fiber of your body remembering just how soft his lips felt. 

“I could fall in love with you, ya know.”

You watched as in the same breath he hopped back across the street and couldn’t help but think you already had. 

————-

Later that night you were snuggled up inside the sheets of your bed. The only thing sticking out was the current book you were reading and the top of your head. 

You hadn’t heard from Jungkook the rest of the day. Your heart hammered inside your chest every time your phone chimed with a new message only to deflate when you realized it wasn’t him. You loved your friends and all, but they weren’t who you’d been looking forward to all evening. 

Maybe you should’ve just gone to him and written down your number. Like a normal human being would’ve done. You just had to be clever and yell it out like a lunatic. For all you knew, you could end up with a random stranger texting you at all hours. 

Your current book that you were supposed to be reading but couldn’t really read because you couldn’t focus was now face planted onto your nose. A soft groan echoing into its pages as you fought not to close it and throw it somewhere in your room. You were a hundred percent sure you’d read the same sentence a few dozen times at this point. 

In the morning, you decided, you most definitely were just going to write it down. Like a sane person would’ve done. You closed your book and placed it down beside you. Your eyes roaming up to stare at your ceiling and wondering if you were ever actually going to go to sleep when your phone chimed off. 

You weren’t in any hurry to look. It could just be your parents from the restaurant making sure you were in bed. It could be one of your friends asking about making plans this weekend. It was probably still everyone but Jungkook and yet…

Your curiosity got the better of you. You shuffled inside your comforter, reached an arm out to grab your phone from the nightstand, and quickly pulled it back inside. You waited for your facial ID to unlock the screen to see who or what you’d received. Your own mind hyping up the suspense of the moment until it read over a reminder text from your dad about your chores for the upcoming weekends. 

You hated you’d let yourself have even a glimmer of hope. It was official. You’d ruined your chances when it came to giving out your number. A groan was creeping its way up your throat as you quickly sent back a text. You knew your chores took over almost every weekend. Even when you’d made plans with friends, you’d ended up never going. 

As soon as you’d hit send you were rolling over to put your phone back on your nightstand. The shrill sound of pinging messages stopped you cold. There was no way your dad had learned to text back that fast. You laid yourself flat back against the mattress and brought the phone to hover above your face. 

Y/N?

Is this the right number finally? 

Hello?!!

If this is the wrong person, I’m sorry. I swear I’m not crazy. Just looking for a girl. 

Your heart leapt into your throat. It was beating so hard you were scared it would burst from your chest. Your eyes were still skimming over the line of text messages when another one sounded. You were so caught up in reading the next line you weren’t aware your clammy fingers had let the phone slip and it crash landed down on your face. 

“Ooow!”

One hand scrambled to pick it back up off your face, while the other massaged the now swelling brim of your nose. 

How many people have you texted before me?

There wasn’t a need to send a hi. To give him a coy response to continue to tease him or make him believe he’d gotten it wrong again. Your curiosity at the desperate way he seemed to have been looking for you was endearing. The thought that he’d spent so much time sending out random messages for a response, no matter how crazy he looked, felt silly but cute too. 

Jungkook thought you were worth the trouble. 

OH MY GOD IS IT REALLY YOU?! And maybe like... seventeen. 

You snuggled deeper into your comforter as a soft giggle joined the growing smile across your face. 

I’m sorry I should have just wrote it down when you offered the pen lol

It definitely would’ve made it a lot easier.

You’d asked yourself that question all evening while you’d waited for him. You bit your lips as your fingers hovered over the keyboard. Unsure if you should take the chance and tell him. 

“Screw it,” you whispered as you typed. 

Took you long enough. I’ve been waiting forever. 

Well, I’m sorry to keep you waiting. This girl thought it was a good idea to shout random numbers at me 😅😂.

Your head was shaking as you tried to figure out something witty to say. You couldn’t believe you were here. Inside your comforter cave smiling at your phone like a lunatic and wondering if maybe Jungkook was doing the same. Or what was he even doing? You were getting ready to type out that exact question when your phone pinged to life. 

So, ugh, on to more important matters. It read. I was thinking about your love of random facts and I think I got one for you. 

Ooooooo kekeke this should be good 

Do you want to know it or not? 

Okay okay! Lol please tell me Kookie

You could practically feel him screaming through your phone as a sideways glance emoji was sent back in a long lined response. You wondered if you’d completely ruined his fact telling when your phone went off. 

I found this article that said the chances of finding your soulmate out of 500,000,000 people was impossible. But, if you just place it to where you are, to your age group, and timing it narrows it down to a 1 in 10,000 chance. What I’m trying to get at is...I think your my 1 in 10,000

You read the message on repeat. Over and over until you were sure you’d practically memorized it front and back. You wanted to ask him for his source material. Where such an article could exist. None of that really mattered to you and how could it? 

You must have spaced out because you never sent him a reply. Your thoughts were still spinning in a world all their own as you wondered if he was sitting at his desk doing homework or lying in bed. If he was inside or outside and what had made him so brave to send that message: believing you felt the same. 

The vibration of the phone brought you back down to earth. You expected to see question marks or another line of, “Hello?” To have left him on read. Instead, the only thing that greeted you was a simple, Goodnight, Y/N. 

This time there was no hesitation from you. 

Goodnight, Jungkook

See you in the morning ?

His text felt so hopeful. A silent undertone that if you said no there was a chance you’d break him. You bit your lip as you thought about what this meant. The beginning of small promises that eventually grew into bigger ones. 

I’ll meet you at the gate

You both finished up with another round of good night’s that felt like the embarrassing texting equivalent of “no you hang up! No you!” And placed your phone back on your night stand. It took forever for the sandman to finally claim you. Your dreams consisting of the magic of being Jungkook’s 1 in 10,000. 

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[tulsa-trash]

Book Swap

Request: could you do a modern!pony x reader imagine where you're both in 9th grade and meet at the library, and one day you finally have the guts to ask for his number, so you guys start texting and then you start crushing on him and then you have to figure out how to tell him, so u ask two-bit and johnny for advice

WARNING(S): N/A

You sighed deeply as you began to reread the same sentence in your book for what felt like the twentieth time. It seemed as though you were reading but not even comprehending the words. To be fair, it was impossible to get lost in a book when a familiar cute boy was sitting a table over from you.

Ponyboy Curtis. How does one even begin to describe the amazing human you had the honor of being within five feet of? Unlike most guys in high school, Pony was something special. He was kind and very smart, you knew this because you have English with him. You've never seen someone so into a class before, he also appeared to have an interest in literature, like you. The both of you were nothing but mere acquaintances, and you secretly wished you could change that.

It didn't help that you found him absolutely dreamy. His brown hair was always a little messy, but it still managed to make him even cuter. You always feel your heart skip a beat whenever your eyes would meet his sparkling green ones in the hallways. You'd smile whenever you'd see him laughing with his friends, it showed off his dimples that sunk into his cheeks. Ponyboy Curtis was the boy of your dreams, and the young man was completely oblivious.

Your phone vibrated on the desk you were sitting at. Glancing up from your book, you seen that it was a text from one of your friends. After placing your bookmark in between the pages you unlocked your phone.

Evie: So? Did you talk to him yet?

You rolled your eyes after reading the message, your fingers quickly tapped at the screen as you typed your response.

Y/N: No obviously not. Now leave me alone.

Kathy: Girl go for it! He's a nice kid you said so yourself.

Y/N: Uh nope. Much rather stare at him from afar and not make a fool of myself attempting to talk to him.

Kathy: Well if you don't not only will I embarrass you in front of lover boy, everyone in this library will see me screaming at you and we'll both probably get kicked out.

Y/N: Wait what? How do you know I'm at the library?? Are you here right now???

Kathy: Look over at the fantasy section you nerd. You being you I obviously knew where YOU would be on a Saturday afternoon.

You looked up, eyes widening in shock as you saw your friend hiding behind a bookshelf watching you with a sly grin.

Kathy: Make a move now or I'm coming over there.

With already shaking hands you put your phone in your pocket and grabbed your book. You sent Kathy a pleading look, but all she did was shake her head and point towards Ponyboy violently. Taking in a deep breath, you got up. The chair scraped against the floor, creating a loud noise which made at least five people look up at you... including him.

"Oh god." You mumbled under your breath.

In your peripheral vision you could see Ponyboy's gaze return to his book, taking that as your cue to move you slowly crept to his table. You had made it to the chair directly across from him, he was so caught up in his book he didn't even notice your presence. You smiled softly, his eyebrows were furrowed in concentration while his eyes scanned the pages back and forth. You awkwardly cleared your throat, not too loud to disturb others but just enough for him to tear his attention from his book to notice you.

"Oh, hey." Ponyboy said, "Can I help you with somethin'?"

"Um..." Jesus this was going to be way harder than you thought. "W-Would you mind if I sat with ya?"

"Not at all. Go ahead." He sent you a friendly smile as he gestured to the chair you were at.

His smile. Your legs already feel like jello, you could've sworn you were going to collapse right then in there.

"Y/N, right?" He asked as you sat down.

"That's me. And you're Ponyboy."

"Yep, couldn't forget a name like that if you tried." He joked.

You giggled as you opened your book, Ponyboy returned to his. Curiosity got the better of you when you looked back up to see what he was reading.

"Gone With the Wind." You read aloud.

"Have you read it before?" He asked.

You shook your head, "I haven't, but I've heard only good things about it. I saw the movie about a year ago and thought it was great."

"The book is amazing!" He gushed, only to be shushed by the librarian walking by. "This is my fifth time reading it." He told you in a more hushed tone.

You snickered, "Must be really great."

"What ya got there?"

You lifted up your book from the table to reveal the cover to him, his bright eyes scanned the cover.

"The Boy in Striped Pajamas?"

"I know the title seems a bit odd, but trust me this is a good read." You told him, "This being my third time reading it."

"Well what's it about?" He asked.

You went on to tell him about your book, and he went on to tell you all about his. The both of you began to talk about anything and everything, you were beyond happy that things were going well. You were having so much fun you completely forgot about Kathy spying on you, before either of you could realize it two hours had gone by.

You peaked at your phone and cursed under your breath, the lock screen had a reminder that your shift at work was starting in less than thirty minutes.

"I really hate to end this... but I gotta go." You said.

"That sucks." He said disappointedly.

You couldn't help feeling a little giddy inside to see that he was upset you were leaving. While you got up and gathered your things, you remembered that you wanted to get his phone number badly. You just had to figure out a way to get it without making things awkward.

"Hey, Pone?"

He hummed in response.

"What do ya say we swap books... and numbers? Thats only if you want to. I just figured since we read them already and it was cool talk--"

"I'd like that." He stopped your rambling, only to send you a warm smile while doing so.

You blushed as the both of you swapped phones to put in each others information along with handing each other your books. With a final wave goodbye you left the library, your best friend of course followed after you. She interrogated you with thousands of questions and the both of you walked to work, you gladly answered them all in an almost dazed state. You felt as if you were walking on air for the rest of the day, and you couldn't wait to text him later on.

-

Two weeks had gone by, and let's just say those two weeks have been the best ones of your life. You and Ponyboy had been texting every single day. At first you just talked about each other's books, but then your conversations started evolve to anything and everything. You knew you had liked him before, but your feelings for him have grown drastically. It was beginning to get unbearable holding in how you truly felt, and you weren't sure if you wanted to tell him.

The fear of rejection was one of the main reasons why you've been thinking of just repressing your feelings. Sure, he seemed to like you, but it felt as though he only liked you simply as a friend. Another reason being you were afraid that it would ruin things between the both of you. You had finally become good friends, the last thing you wanted was for everything to end up being awkward all because of you and your silly crush.

After a lot of thinking you decided you needed some advice, and by advice you mean advice thats not only from Kathy. She keeps telling you to go for it, but she doesn't really know Ponyboy well. That's why you got the idea to ask one of his buddies on their opinion. Luckily Pony invited you to watch him and his friends play football. You ceased the opportunity, not only would you be able to watch the boy of your dreams get all sweaty and tuff looking, you could also get one of his friends alone to talk about how you felt.

It was a warm, Sunday morning in Tulsa. The sun was high in the sky and beat down harshly on the group of boys tackling each other in the giant field. You sat under a tree with a notebook in your lap, a cool breeze would rush by every now and then, cooling you off the slightest. You doodled randomness on the blank pages, sketching pictures and honing your writing skills. Every now and then you would glance up and watch the game for a few, sometimes cheering the boys on or laughing when they began to goof off and wrestle each other on the ground.

There was a particular drawing you found yourself enthralled in, as the pencil in your hand smoothly ran across the paper you found yourself sketching a picture of Ponyboy's face. You were so focused you didn't even notice someone come over and take a seat right beside you.

"Nice drawin' you got there." A quiet voice spoke.

You quickly slammed the notebook closed and snapped you head to the right, it was Ponyboy's best friend, Johnny. A tiny smirk was tugging at his lips as he looked at you with one eyebrow raised.

"T-Thanks." You stuttered nervously.

"You like him, huh?" He asked you.

You stood silent as you played with the grass below you, pulling it from the Earth and rubbing it between your fingers. Your gaze was straight ahead watching the game, you were afraid to meet Johnny's gaze that was burning holes into the side of your head.

"Yes..." You hesitated a bit, "I do."

"Does he know?"

"No!" You said hopelessly, "And I'm not sure if I even want him to know."

"Why not?"

"Because he probably doesn't feel the same..." You trailed off.

"Hey now, ya never know." Johnny said.

"What are you two kiddies doin' over here?" A loud voice bellowed.

It was none other than Two-Bit, he staggered over to the both of you before plopping down to your left. He was breathing heavily, sweat dripping down his forehead and trickling down his neck.

"You tryin' to make moves on Pony's girl or somethin', John?" Two asked playfully.

Your heart fluttered, 'Pony's girl.'

"No way, man. Trust me." Johnny chuckled.

"Pony's girl?" You repeated to him questioningly.

"Oh yeah! I see the way y'all look at each other I ain't blind."

You let Two's words sink in, was it that obvious that you liked him? He even said that Pony looks at you a certain way as well. Maybe there was a chance he shared your feelings after all.

"You think he likes me or somethin'?" You asked casually.

"Oh I don't think, I know."

You smiled softly, butterflies erupting in your stomach. In the back of your mind you worried that you were getting your hopes up a little too high, but you couldn't help it.

"I like him too." You admitted.

Two-Bit scoffed, "Tell me somethin' I don't know."

"Well... what should I do?"

"Tell him." Two replied.

"I agree." Johnny piped up.

Both nerves and excitement began to bubble up inside you as you got up and gathered your things.

"Where are you off to?" Johnny asked as you began to jog away from them.

"Gotta head home. Tell Ponyboy I'm sorry I had to leave but I'll text him later!"

"See ya later lover girl!" Two-Bit hollered after you while preceding to make kissing noises.

You laughed to yourself and shook your head, "Idiot."

-

Y/N: Whats up Pone-bone?

Ponyboy: Nothing much lil lady, and yourself?

Y/N: Same. Btw sorry for leaving so soon today, had some things to do.

Ponyboy: It's alright.

Hey what were you, Johnny and Two talking about? They didn't try to tease you or nothin right?

Y/N: Nooo ofc not they were just chattin

But thats actually what I wanted to talk to you about...

Ponyboy: Well... Go on then

Y/N: Okay I'm just gonna say it

I like you

like a lot

Ponyboy: As a friend or?

Y/N: No silly, like more than friends...

Ponyboy: Wait actually?

Y/N: Yes Pony

Ponyboy: Seriously??

Y/N: OMG YES!!

I LIKE YOU A LOT!

... im sorry if it weirds you out

Ponyboy: NO! NO IT DOESN'T.

SORRY

... Just wanted to make sure this isn't a prank or whatever.

But in all seriousness yes, I like you a whole lot.

Y/N: Are you sure?

Ponyboy: Positive doll

Do you wanna grab some milkshakes at the Dingo next weekend?

Y/N: Are you asking me out onna date Curtis?

Ponyboy: Yes, I am ;)

Y/N: Well I would love to :)

#the outsiders #the outsiders x reader #the outsiders ponyboy #the outsiders imagine #the outsiders fanfiction #the outsiders fic #the outsiders fluff #the outsiders fandom #ponyboy curtis #ponyboy michael curtis #ponyboy x reader #ponyboy curtis x reader #ponyboy curtis imagine #ponyboy curtis fanfiction #ponyboy fic #modern!ponyboy #ponyboy curtis au #c thomas howell

[mythiccheroacademia]

Can we get hcs for Bakugo, Midoriya, and Todoroki (separately) falling in love with reader who takes no bs but is also kinda shy?

Reader Doesn’t Take Shit from Nobody

mtha thots: getting back into the swing of things! hopefully this was okay :’)

warnings: none 

Bakugo Katsuki: 

bakugo couldnt stand you

but he also couldn’t help falling for you

it’s a crazy concept for him considering how you two did NOT get along at first

you and him butt heads from the beginning

from day one of class, he was being a little shit and you just didn’t care for it

the moment he figured that out was when he was stomping down the hallways, pissed off about something 

he roughly knocked into your shoulder 

you didn’t know if it was on accident or not but you were willing to just let it go 

that was, until bakugo opened his big mouth

“watch where you’re going, extra!”

you: 🤨

he wasn’t expecting you, the quite person in class, to quiet literally buck at him and shout back

“watch where you’re stepping, punk!”

him: 😧

katsuki was too stunned to reply before you stalked off, steaming

from then on, it was like he had heart eyes in the angriest way possible 

there was something about you that got his attention 

you’d walk by and he’d go: 😡🤬❤️

sometimes, he found himself pushing his luck just so you’d talk to him—even if it meant threatening to kick him in the throat if he yelled at you one more time 

everyone thought it was a bit weird that bakugo was so admant on bothering you

you were kinda shy and didn’t talk much 

but they figured it was just how bakugo worked 

you thought the same 

so imagine your surprise on White Day (Valentine’s Day but for men) when you were cornered by the blonde hero

he aggressively shoved a box of homemade chocolates in your hand and shouted something about you still being annoying before stomping away 

like the emotionally constipated boy he was 

but despite everything, you still couldnt help but softly smile at the love note attached to it reading:

i still think you’re an extra, but i hope i can convince you to be my extra

Midoriya Izuku:

it’s in this boy’s dna to befriend the most intimidating of people 

despite the fact that he once saw you almost lose your life after cursing a certain explosive hero from hell and back again, he was hooked

call it love at first sight or something, bc this boy was basically struck by cupid’s arrow 

izuku found himself intrigued by everything you were

even though you didn’t take shit from anyone...

you were very quiet and didn’t talk to many people 

it was hard for you to make friends bc of it 

but that’s okay bc you were content with yourself

often times, you kept to yourself and just focused on your studies

it made you hard to approach but izuku was determined!

albeit, it took a long time before he actually spoke to you 

he was still a nervous bean

for a few weeks, he just watched you 

he’d watch you from the corner of his eye during class, blushing every time one of his friends would call him out on it 

his eyes were glued to you every time you used your powers

even when you did mundane stuff, he’d notice your tiny quirks 

and every day he’d find himself falling deeper and deeper for you 

it wasn’t until todoroki caught him doodling you in your hero costume that the dekusquad realized his feelings 

“you’ve got it bad,” ochako would tease

that turned into an hour long session of midoriya ranting about how to approach you and confess his feelings

“i heard talking to people works”

todoroki’s a little shit when he wants to be

but he’s also right 

mustering up as much courage as he could, izuku walked up to your desk before class

you were about to ask if he needed to go to the medical bay bc of how red his face was but he interrupted you with a flurry of words

“HELLO!i my name is izuku midoriya and i think you’re really cool and--w-wait i meant to say you’re prett--WAIT! okay. sorry. i’m--i mean i think it would be pretty cool if we like--oh geez this sounds so weird. i promise i’m not u-usally like this, i just thought i--”

the shock on your face melted into a gentle smile

“hi, midoriya. i’m [l/n] [f/n]”

and it was like your voice calmed the storm in his head

izuku’s cheeks were still flushed but he was able to return the smile as he felt his heart grow bigger

you really were beautiful 

“hi L/N. i’m midoriya izuku”

“you said that already”

bless his heart 😭

Todoroki Shouto: 

tbh, shouto hadn’t really noticed you in the beginning

granted, he was sorting through a lot of personal stuff 

but you were so quiet and shy that he sort of...looked over you 

(he did that to everyone so don’t take it to heart)

although, it was the opposite for you 

you noticed him from the first day of class

how could you not? everyone did 

he was the really strong really pretty boy that got in through a reccomendation AND he was the son of endeavor 

maybe he was kind of intimidating and a bit cold, but that didn’t stop you from admiring him

....and also developing a small crush on him that you’d take to the grave

bc, let’s be real, the chances of him returning your feelings were zero to none and you forced yourself to be okay with that

but things changed when you overheard shouto’s and midoriya’s conversation before the sport’s festival 

it absolutely broke your heart 

you kept it to yourself bc it wasn’t your business to go butting into his life

but when you were walking down the hall to find a bathroom and accidentally walked in on shouto and endeavor’s talk, you couldn’t help yourself 

endeavor immediately stopped and noticed the hard look on your face. when you didn’t bow in respect, he spoke up

“it’d do you well to show some respect to your elders, little girl/boy”

you stopped, looked him up and down, before walking off 

endeavor scoffed and went back to talking to his son 

but todoroki was shook

his heart literally went doki doki 😳❤️ LMAOO

the next day he asked for your name 

th following weeks he found himself sitting with you during lunch or studying for exams 

you got closer and closer to one another

you were a timid presence, but your sense of justice was strong

you didn’t take bs from anyone, including those that were above you and todoroki couldnt help but be intrigued

shouto didn’t realize it until it was too late, but one day, he woke up and felt this incredibly strong urge to be by you 

it wouldn’t go away for the longest time and only got worse every time he saw you 

it wasn’t until momo broke it down for him that he realized he fell for you

and he fell hard 

and although shouto was new to this, he wouldn’t miss the opportnity to see it through 

bc you were special to him and he’d be damned if he let you go 

Requests are closed

#bakugo katsuki #bakugo x reader #izuku midoriya #izuku x reader #todoroki shouto #todoroki x reader #bnha scenarios #mha headcanons

[jujutsubabe]

Library

Synopsis: (This is set when Gojo and Getou were in highschool) You are all in the library trying to practice presentations but Gojo can’t stop being distracting.

(I mean,,, no ship tbh? Kinda platonic reader insert but u can take it as Gojo flirting)

Word count: 1.7k

—————

A library is supposed to be silent, filled with studying and well focused people. It’s a place meant for peace and quiet, so everyone there can get a good grasp on their subjects without any distractions.

The library is known for being the best place to work in, you are surrounded by peers and books and computers of all kind. The amount of resources is unlimited, mixing alone and social time all into one setting, a beautiful design.

However, if you mix a quiet respectable place with three idiots, you tend to get the opposite of what a library is supposed to be.

The library was filled with your quiet snorts and giggles as you sat in the back of the room, you putting your hand over your mouth did nothing to silence you as you shook.

Gojo bit down on his lip as he tried to contain his laugh as well, waiting for the right timing to say another dumb joke.

You felt the stares of a few of your peers, but couldn’t help from giggling in your corner. It was one of those rare moments where you felt air escape your lungs in a good way, the crunching of your sides was a ticklish feeling. It was so carefree and fun, a simple memory you would keep every time you entered a library.

You turned to Gojo at the same time as him, trying to put on a serious face but when you saw his struggling one you couldn’t help but crack a huge smile and fall back into your lap cackling. He turned away snickering to his side as well.

You had been here for what felt like hours, you trying to go over your presentation but barely getting through the first slide with how Gojo suddenly wanted to be a comedian. Not letting you catch a break each slide.

It didn’t help that you were already behind in your presentation, he just fed into your procrastination. Making this workload ease into other hours of your day, it seemed like the only thing you could do for the day was work on this presentation.

Getou rested his chin on his hand, “You egg him on when you do that.”

“I know!” You wheezed, “But its so—so hard, I can’t focus.”

Gojo leaned in to whisper something else but Getou tilted his head, “Satoru, you’re a distraction.”

He pulled back, fixing his sunglasses with a wide grin. The class clown couldn’t help but make light of such a boring atmosphere, what was he even supposed to do in here? (Study Gojo… study…)

Picking on you two was way more fun than doing his fifty-billion already missing assignments.

“What?” He looked over his glasses, “It’s not my fault I’m this funny.”

“No, he’s right!” You took deep breaths, pulling into your center, “He’s right, let me try again and don’t distract me!” You pointed with a warning intent.

He grinned at you, playing on his innocent expression, which didn’t come across as very genuine.

It was like he called for attention to himself just by entering a room. No one could ignore him. So imagine how much harder it would be to ignore him if this giant ray of sunshine was sitting right next to you, pestering you every second.

“So,” you skimmed over your notes, “for this presentation, I wanted to research how the possible extinction of polar bears is such a condenen— conquential—conquista-- conse-”

“Are you trying to say consequential?” Geto asked.

There was a slight moment of silence, maybe half a second before, like a burst of a bubble, Gojo snorted and turned his head to the side giggling away. It didn’t help that his laugh was so contagious. It was like a yawn, when one person did it everyone else did.

Geto looked away, covering the slight curl of his mouth. He tried his best to be the mature one in the group but sometimes Gojo broke down that expectation with something as simple as giggling like a child.

Him trying to not smile mixed with Gojo’s actual laugh made it so much harder to not give in yourself. These two really couldn’t stop goofing around, no matter the situation.

You forced a frown, “Guys, It’s not funny!”

Gojo made a look at Getou, and Getou let out the lightest huff of air before shaking his head. “You’re right. Continue.”

“Thank you,” you cleared your throat, getting your notes in order, “I think it’s important to note that a big factor that could lead to their extinction are greenhouse gas em… emm...emnio—”

You squinted at the page, pulling it closer, you ignored Gojo’s pestering smile beside you. If you even looked at him you knew this would be all bad, he had a way of pulling you from work and not letting you get back to it.

Getou tapped the paper, “What’s wrong?”

You slid the paper to him, “I don’t know how to say that.”

He pulled the paper to his face with a slight frown. He blinked a few times, trying to not let confusion seep onto his face. With a little bit of inspecting, he eventually slipped the paper across for Gojo to help.

Gojo blinked back at the paper, a smile curling onto his face, “Is this your handwriting…?”

Getou hid his face while Gojo’s smile widened into a grin, then a chuckle, then a full on laugh, the both of them snickering onto themselves. You rolled your eyes, as Gojo banged his hand on the table like he saw the funniest thing on the damn planet.

These two were rolling over themselves over your sleep filled handwriting! It wasn’t even that funny!

You scoffed as the two went into hysterics over your handwriting, trying to fight off the smile crawling it’s way onto your face. It took so much to not give in.

It was all fun and games until a few students started to share a few looks from across the room. A few glared your direction, some actually leaving the place for a quieter place to study. No one seemed to enjoy your table's joy the same way you all were.

The three of you were being a nuisance to the quiet work environment, contradicting the point of a library with your presence. But why was laughing in the library more fun than laughing in your room with each other?

Was it the concept of breaking the rules that tickled you? Or maybe it was the hysteria of working on something for too long without breaks, forcing you all into taking a different kind of break.

None of you noticed when a select few students got up to talk to the teachers about you three. Whispering to the side and pointing a teacher your direction.

Your head popped up when you heard the light tapping of heels and keychains coming your direction. A more than pissed off adult looking straight towards your table.

You shook Gojo and grabbed his arm, “Dude shut up! Shut up the teachers coming!”

Before you could grab yourselves together, the teacher already arrived by your table, tapping on the desk until she got your attention. “I’m going to need you all to quiet down or leave. You’re being a distraction.”

Gojo quirked a brow, opening his mouth, but you spoke up before he said something disrespectful.

“Sorry.” You nudged the guy next to you, “We’ll be more quiet.”

She pursed her lips as she did a once over of you all, definitely memorizing your faces. You lot were making this poor lady do more than needed on her shift. She probably couldn’t wait until you guys messed up again so she could kick you out for good.

“Thank you.” She did a last sharp look before she eventually turned, walking away to the front desk again. Full hawk eyes on your table.

You turned around to the group, trying to regain composure. It was so awkward having her stare and know that you had to be on your best behavior. Everyone sat silently, no one even moving.

Until Gojo leaned back in his seat, twisting his head to look at you. You tried your best to not look at him…you could literally feel his stare through your head. He was insufferable.

…However, you couldn’t help the curiosity and slowly turned your head to meet his eyes. Just one look and his face flooded into a winced grin, already trying to hold back laughter with a squeaking sound from him.

With that, your composure broke and you released a set of giggles while Getou covered his mouth. Just like that Gojo won, he ate this attention up, releasing his own dumb fit of laughter.

You guys really couldn’t go a minute in silence could you?

Getou smiled and stood from the table, “Were not getting anything done. Let’s get food.”

You nodded, you were surprised it took this long for someone to realize that. This was a highly anticipated break you put off for too long, not realizing just how much time was wasted goofing off until now.

“I want ice cream!” Gojo slung your bag over his shoulder.

You blinked between the two as they gathered their belongings, starting to disperse from the table. You were still getting yourself together, scrambling with your things as the tall pair strided to the exit. “Guys wait up!”

They very much did not wait up, if anything it seemed as though their pace got quicker. (Gojo even looked back before grinning that sinister smile of his and walking faster.)

When you darted out of the seat, you just so happened to glance back at the table.

It had a few balled up sheets of paper under it, (that Gojo made and threw at the both of you) the chair’s weren’t pushed in, and if you looked closely you could see a few doodles sprawled along it.

For some reason, the table setting that would definitely piss off that teacher, made you smile. It showed proof that you and your friends had been there, that a few teens were messing around and having fun before they left.

Which you did, you made a good memory today. Those small moments of laughing at dust with friends, warmth from being so happy, comfort from having a tight bond.

It was all you needed, and all you wanted to remember anyways.

#jjk gojo x reader #jjk x reader #jjk #jujutsu kaisen x reader #Gojo Satoru x reader #Satoru x reader #gojo/reader #gojo x reader fluff #getou x reader #lowkey tbh #very lowkey Getou x reader #do I even tag that.... #whatever yes I will🙄 #not me posting back to back #is this healthy??? #am I addicted to tumblr😟😟?? #jujutsu kaisen #fluff #reader insert #whatever I’m done goodnight #I hope u find a friend group that makes u laugh all day

[franeridart]

Anon said: i love love love LOVE how you just draw gojo leaning onto getou, hiding his face in getou's neck or back or chest <////3 im just so heartbroken over those two

So glad to hear you like him clingy as much as I do!! TT^TT as far as I’m concerned he wasn’t clingy enough in canon, so I’m fixing it as much as I can with every new doodle haha

Anon said: whenever im sad i just come to your account and look through your art :")) it brings me so much comfort :')) also i gotta mention that the teacher getou art you've made has healed my broken heart bc of jjk and now that is the only canon i accept thank you very much gege akutami has nothing on me

GAH GETO-SENSEI MY ONE AND ONLY I’m happy he makes you as soft as he does me, he’s such a comfort to me ;;;; and thank you for liking my stuff!!!! Means the world to me to hear it ;A; <3

Anon said: I miss your krbk sm 😔 No pressure intended!!!!!! I still love and support u and ur art!!!

Man I miss them too!!!!! @ hori when are you bringing my loves back from the war I’m here waiting good sir!!!

Anon said: v v curious on your thoughts on what’s currently going on in bnha manga :)))

HMMM what are my thoughts on it? Well, let’s split it in two: Deku’s side and Todoroki’s side, because that’s how it’s split in my brain atm, and allow me to start from the second because it’s easier to get through for me

I’m in love with everything Hori is doing with Todoroki and everyone involved with him - that’s to say his whole whole family and Hawks and Jeanist too, all of it, I’m so into it it’s no joke at all. Always been in love with how he handles Enji’s character and his interactions with his family and the latest developments didn’t disappoint me at all, wasn’t very much into Dabi right after the “reveal” but the more I think about it and about the story from his pov the more behind it I am, forever and always head over heels for Shouto’s way of dealing with a situation that’s as complex as one would expect from a protagonist of their very own story you could really make a manga out of the Todoroki’s family plot from Shouto’s pov alone, it’s incredible I can’t state how in love with it all I am enough. And Hawks, don’t make me start on him I’ll straight up never stop, absolutely and most definitely my favorite pro-hero I would trust him with my money and my kids 100/10 just assume I’m constantly crying over him. Also Jeanist is just hilarious so bless him and his presence in an otherwise too heavy story

Deku’s side........ well, the main problems I have with it are that one, I don’t really understant the need to keep ofa a secret from the class for the biggest part of the story when the reveal wasn’t forced upon Deku, didn’t have a huge impact on him or his relationship with the others (his leaving wasn’t directly caused by him coming clean after all, he wouldn’t have had to leave earlier had he not kept it a secret and he would have still left at this point had the class already known all along) and didn’t, like. Matter. All that much. Two, this manga is called my hero academia and I’m genuinely starting to wonder why. What was the point of all the arcs set inside the school anyway? Most of the characters growth (Deku’s especially) and the progression of the main plot happened in the arcs outside of the school anyway, and at this point it’s clear we’re not going back to the school after this or even seeing anyone graduate. What of Shinsou? What was the point of his plot when we’re not even gonna see him being active part of the class in a school environment? I’m just confused about it all, I guess. Three, which is really my biggest problem with it all, is the way Deku’s set on saving Shigaraki. It’s not like I don’t like a story in which all the villains are saved and the good guys win and love prevails and all that, call it corny but they’re exactly my type of stories, but I’m not sure I can get behind it when Twice died like that, and Midnight did as well, and Aizawa lost a leg, and Nighteye died, and Hawks might have lost his wings, and Shirakumo ended up Kurogiri and it’s still unclear whether he can be saved, like... why does Shigaraki get to be saved when so many people suffered like that? And it’s not only about them suffering by his hands, it’s about Hori and how he was ruthless with so many characters but lets the story show arbitrary kindness to Shigaraki alone, it’s all... well. Unfair. The way I see it. At this point I at the very least expect kindness for Touya as well, here.

That said if I pick the chapters one by one by themselves I do enjoy them very much. I just don’t gotta think about the big picture lmao AH but it’s all a personal opinion, of course! I know people who enjoy the way the story is going and I can see where they’re coming from, this is all arbitrary tastes and preferences on my part, I’m aware of it!

Anon said: Hi hi! I finally got into jjk AND finally caught up on the manga and i appreciate your doods soooo much more now!! They’re so great!! But imcurious, is there one specific moment in the story where you Gojo and Geto became IT for you? Just genuinely curious!!

THANK YOU happy to hear you liked jjk!!!! And that’s!!! a great question, I’m not sure I have an answer actually? I binged the manga in a day and a half, you see, and when I binge stuff that fast I rarely stop to overthink things - I did ship them as I read too since, well. They’re in love lmao but I shipped them in the same way I shipped itafushi or yuutoge after I read the prequel, you know? Just a general aknowledging of how good they were together. The main point with satosugu specifically was probably that satoru has been my favorite character since the beginning of the story and suguru got there as well as soon as I read their backstory, so once I was caught up they’re the ones I ended up spending the most time thinking about, both by themselves and together, and that ended up making me a bit obsessed..... just a bit lol

If I had to give one specific moment that got me by the heart and squeezed the hardest it’d be... probably Satoru’s “my soul knows otherwise”. And the way his voice alone could bring Suguru back, even for just a single moment. The thing about satosugu for me!!! one of the many things about them, but the main thing for me, is that they love each other. Be it platonic or however you wanna see it, they love each other. Despite everything and after it all, even if Satoru had to kill Suguru, even if Suguru killed so many and betrayed Satoru and they went their separate ways in the harshest of ways, they love each other. It’s insane, isn’t it? That they’d love each other so much they could pass over everything and anything. I’ve seen the “best friends become enemies” trope so often in shounen manga, but this is the first time I see it treated like this - with love so strong that they never blamed each other or turned that love in hate. The way satosugu do it is all-encompassing! It goes beyond the world and their differences and death itself! So if I had to pick it’d be that one, because that scene happens after it’s all over, and it all went to shit and way beyond too already, and still their souls resonate with each other and answer to each other and that sends me insane, just thinking about it. Like, god, they really still love each other. Satoru’s mourned for Suguru for a year, Suguru’s been dead for a year, they’d been separated ten whole years before then, and still! And still!!! It’s so tender I don’t know how to deal with it

Anon said: “What’s a god to a nonbeliever?”—That tag is going to haunt me for a while. The entire tag section for your latest Gojo and Geto drawing is meta-worthy.

THANK YOU it’d been eating at my brain I had to write it down somewhere why are those two like that

Anon said: Do you take commissions? No pressure! ✨❤️

Not right now!

Anon said: How do you feel about sukuna ? like/dislike or thoughts on him

AMAZING QUESTION I love him. I have absolutely zero clue as of why so don’t ask me to elaborate, I’m literally that marge pic with the potato when it’s about Sukuna, I have no meta thoughts about him nor deep reasonings behind it - by all accounts, I should dislike him! But he shows up and I’m like nghhh king, so that’s where we stand. It’s Sukuna, you know. I just think he’s neat.

Anon said: sighs time to get into another fandom bc i simp too hard for ur art 😔

HAH thank you for the trust I hope you’ll like ror if you do get into it!!! hahaha

#fran answers #oh two of these are Long #..... #long post #in case the readmore doesn't work for whatever reason

[5uptic]

crewfu: fanfic spotlight!

We work together by Anonymous (5up & DK, unrated, gen | 248 words)

Summary: One likes plants and baking, the other loves to create and design video games. They stay up and create monstrosities together, it's their fun, it's their favourite game. Aka a 5up and Dk roommate au!

No matter how life tangles, I’m still here with you. by hungryandsleepy (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 279 words)

Summary: 5up has been working so hard on his new map, and of course, he needs someone to give him a motivation to go to sleep.

objectively pretty by vesque (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 462 words)

Summary: steve is drunk. he's pretty sure 5up is too. that doesn't mean being called pretty is any less momentuous.

you plus me by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 489 words)

Summary: 5up and Steve meet.

he said to me by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 656 words)

Summary: 5up and Steve share a moment.

by the snowmen by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 670 words)

Summary: Steve has a moment when it's all over.

today you got to know me (a little bit too slowly) by runninohhoney (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 675 words)

Summary: Steve lights up a cigarette. 5up doesn't smoke.

what would it take by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 787 words)

Summary: It's Steve's first mission. He hecks up. Or does he?

sorta cute by floweruru (5up/Steve, unrated, m/m | 822 words)

Summary: ‘I wouldn’t do that,’ he said. ‘That’s just disrespectful,’ he said. Yet there was 5up, crushed like a can in Steve’s embrace, feebly kicking at nothing as his feet leave the pavement.

i was gonna kill u, but ur kinda cute?? by Cthulhuer (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 1k words)

Summary: Steve is a mess and 5up is worse.

I hear a Symphony by AwkwardAce (5up/Fundy, unrated, m/m | 1.1k words)

Summary: He exhaled until his lungs ached for air, fingers twitching as he opted to remove the sleek white gloves he wore in a feeble effort to soothe himself. It didn’t work. He wrung his trembling hands together as his eyes raked down the worn leather case taking in the doodles- some etched some drawn- across the faded surface. He snapped the buckles open and his breath hitched, catching in his already tight throat. For a moment the world span, his head throbbed and he wanted nothing more than to run and hide. 5up breathed out slowly, shakily.

staring by lytriis (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.1k words)

Summary: steve asks 5up out. 5up doesn’t know how to respond.

and it's four am, and yet, you're here by vesque (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 1.2k words)

Summary: in which steve shows up at 5up's house, in the middle of the night, completely spontaneously

more than this by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.2k words)

Summary: Steve catches 5up venting.

3:15 by vesque (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 1.2k words)

Summary: Steve tries to guess Five's name. It's much more difficult than he anticipated.

things were different by fourpebbles (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.5k words)

Summary: His eyes circled around to his friends, Kimi and Janet engaging in pleasant comversation, sleepy and becoming increasingly more sober. He looked, finally, across him, and caught Dumbdog staring at him. What now bro, what did this guy want. small talk, turns into not small talk, then there's no talk

Once Upon A Dream by SmearedWords (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.5k words)

Summary: 5up looks ethereal, while Steve is struggling to breathe. "You're not real either." Or: Steve has a crush and a nightmare in three parts, 5up is tired, the crew life is hard and Polus sucks.

the ones you love will call you back by homeward_bound (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.8k words)

Summary: stevesuptic: dude, is it weird that i miss vegas   DumbDog: No? I do too.   stevesuptic: okay [steve misses vegas and apollo. they talk about it]

cough it out by cj__writes (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2k words)

Summary: Apollo thinks that Steve must be well and truly gone, at this point, because he giggles, like Apollo’s just told a particularly funny joke. He looks Apollo right in the eye and asks, “Do you trust me?” “Absolutely not.”

ivy by Secular_Czar (5up/Steve, teen rating, gen | 2.1k words)

Summary: It might be a sad day, in general, but Steve isn't about to let it get to him. His friends won't ever let him wallow either.

The Colosseum by WhenTheFogClears (general rating, gen | 2.1k words)

Summary: Five squinted, looking at the colosseum intensely. He thinks Apollo was latched onto the sphinx’s shoulder, fur matted with blood. Janet was slumped against a column, probably out, with Kimi whose bow was snapped in two, her leg twisted at an odd angle. DK was in the corner trying to cast various supporting hexes and charms with a broken arm, whilst Hafu was dragging a heavily bandaged Steve away. or 5up slaughters a cat

Oneshots :) by woofles1990 (5up/Fundy, 5up/Steve, teen rating, multi | 2.5k words, oneshot collection)

Summary: Just a bunch of MCYT/Among Us oneshots, mainly featuring 5up's crew because yes :)

the adventures of 5up and steve staying up late because they're under 30 by 5280ft (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2.5k words)

Summary: “The night is young!” Steve yells at the ceiling, throwing his hands up in the air. “Take advantage of it! Commit crimes! Fuck hoes!” Five catches his hands in the air and laughs. “You wish you had hoes.”

unreasonably in love by cj__writes (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2.6k words, chaptered WIP)

Summary: "It was like pieces of a puzzle, everything coming together. And now, here they are, standing in their apartment, which looks more like a hollow shell than a home, filled solely with scattered boxes and the minuscule amount of furniture that they brought with them to Vegas." Or: what happens after Apollo and Steve move in together.

cant be love by fourpebbles (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 3.5 words, chaptered WIP)

Summary: He had chuckled to himself, he felt so stupid. Who in their fucking minds names a playlist 'sugr?', he thought, internally cringing. A story where a Steve meets an Apollo, and some things happen.

Somewhere in the darkness, us together for a while by tumtummeke (Apollo & Kimi & Steve, teen rating, gen | 3.6k words)

Summary: Apollo worries about Steve. Steve breaks his vape pen. Kimi plays power washer. Self-indulgent angst, with a generous helping of friendship and cuddles.

odyssey by 5280ft (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 23k words, chaptered WIP)

Summary: "First you will come to the Sirens who enchant all who come near them. If any one unwarily draws in too close and hears the singing of the Sirens...they warble him to death with the sweetness of their song. Therefore pass these Sirens by and stop your men's ears with wax that none of them may hear." -Homer, The Odyssey

Also: SilverSprinklez10‘s yupwaves collection.

Summary: This is a Harry Potter AU based on the characters/personas of the youtubers/streamers.

FAQ:

Wait what is this: pretty straight to the point! i’ll regularly share crewfu-related fanfictions to this blog :)

How regularly is “regularly”?: great question! LOL. it depends on the flow of fanfics that get uploaded, which i do not have any control over, but i’m looking forward to do this twice a month. after all, it’s only me doing this and i often run on a tight schedule.

What’s the format like?:

[title of fic with link] by [author of the fic with link] ([main pairing(s), if there is one/multiple], [fic rating: eg, general rating], [relationship: eg, m/m] | [word count in k] ([added prompt to specify if it’s complete or not)])

Summary: [summary provided by the author. if it doesn’t have a summary, a “No summary” prompt will be put instead]

(What does WIP mean again?): Work In Progress :)

Why are you doing this?: from the beginning, my blog has hosted conversations about RPF (real people fiction) and crewfu pairings. this has evolved into people sending me updates about certain fics in the crewfu tags every now and then, but i wanna take the next step and just do these things myself. after all, i’m already lurking in the tags often to see the fics that get posted. as someone who is both a writer and a reader, i wanna appreciate fanfic writers and help out other people that want to read fanfic and consume more fandom content!

Will it be AO3 only?: well, ao3 has a very helpful tag system that makes finding fics incredibly easy, as well as allowing people with no accounts to like and comment on fics, so that’s the site i will personally look in for fanworks. but if there are any fics you’ve written or liked in any other platforms, such as wattpad, you can always contact me through my inbox (send an ask or a dm!), and i’ll make sure to include for the next fanfic spotlight :)

Does it mean you won’t reply to fic asks anymore?: yeah, i guess. since i’ll be doing the searching myself it seems counterproductive. but if i ever skip a fic or again, it’s in another platform, or you’ve posted/read the fic a while ago and you want to get more traction on it, hit me up and i’ll take it into consideration!

Will you read every single one of the fics on your list?: oh no. again, i run on a tight schedule, and also i have my own taste when it comes to fics. i won’t be reviewing fics or any of the sort, and my intention extends to simply sharing these fics to this page so people will have easier access to them :) that’s where ao3 tagging becomes SUPER useful!!!

So what’s the criteria for the way you’ll sort out the fics in your list?: word count, going from lowest to highest. in case of fics in other platforms, i guess i’ll put them at the top of the list. i’ll also be looking for fairly recent fics, so let me know if you want any old-ish fic to be included.

I see you talking mostly about 5up/Steve and Steve/Apollo. Can I still send/see other crewfu fics?: why yes absolutely! my goal is to push every fic which heavily features regular crewfu characters - 5uptic and supdog just happen to be very popular pairings. so, to give you a list: core 4 (5up, hafu, dk, steve), apollo, aipha, annie, janet, kimi, ellum, koji... you know the drill. it doesn’t have to be centered on a relationship, or about 5up in specific, etc. my only requirement is that any of the previously mentioned members are a central part of the fic or are HEAVILY featured in it (sorry, minecraft fics with 50+ tags who only mention 5up as an afterthought won’t make the cut :/).

Isn’t shipping Bad™?: well, it’s a little more nuanced than that. i will go out of my way to discourage and shame people who often violate CCs’ boundaries by acting like so and so has a crush on this person, or that this and that are Actually Into Each Other or secretly dating. any sort of tinhat bullshit is a big nono (think larries). but i run on the assumption that people who write rpf understand that what they’re doing is simply write a completely fictional story using real life personalities, and understand the boundaries necessary to do it - aka they’re not tinhats, they understand they can’t assume everything about CCs’ thoughts and personalities, they understand that what they’re writing is strictly fiction, they keep these works only in fandom circles, etc. (but again, it’s only one me doing this, so please be kind if i don’t happen to know that this person is Actually a tinhat or whatever).

show fic: NO. (seriously. i don’t feel comfortable putting my ao3 account out there. please respect my privacy on these trying times <3)

I REALLY don’t care about your rpf/fic talk: fair! i’ll be tagging every single one of these posts as “fanfic spotlight”, so just mute the tag using tumblr settings so you’ll never have to look at these! likewise, you can follow the tag if you want to keep up with it, or search it on my blog to look at the other entries you might have missed (but this is the first one! lol).

Hey, my fic is here and I don’t feel comfortable with it being shared over here: no problem! let me know as soon as you can and i’ll take it down <3

#crewfu #fanfic spotlight

[wincore]

childhood dreams | mark lee

pairing: singer!mark x reader

words: 3.3k

summary: you’ve been thinking of childhood dreams lately, and it seems like mark’s been doing the same.

genre: childhood friends to strangers to lovers(?), fluff, angst

warnings: none

song rec(s): childhood dreams - seraphine (cover) [orig. ARY]

a/n: im obsessed with this cover and i need to write cheesy drabbles to prevent writing droughts so here u go friends 👁👁 

Mark sits at his desk, bouncing his leg in compulsive habit as he has for the past half an hour. Your presence doesn’t make much of a difference to him—and it would be far more disheartening if there wasn’t more than half a decade of unsaid things between the two of you. With notebook pages crumpled on the floor, a mild scent of musk in the room and Mark’s refusal to look you in the eye, you don’t think this reunion could get any worse.

Or it could, you tell yourself when Mark clenches another page in his hand, glancing at you before turning back to the neatly bundled pages on his desk. He looks uncomfortable, and discomfort wasn’t something you ever recalled in your friendship.

“Mark,” you call. “Why don’t you take a break?”

He looks up at you again, doe eyes and rosy cheeks, and you wonder where it went wrong—where you could have gone wrong. There’s no explanation and there hasn’t been one since tenth grade. He used to look you in the eye back then at least, and joke with you, study with you, hang out with you. Is it wrong to say you were best friends then? You can’t really tell right now, as you cross your legs, withering into your own being on his bed that looks like it hasn’t been made for three days. Some things don’t change, after all.

And some things do.

“Okay,” he says, pushing himself from the wooden desk, which now looks a little lonely. He turns his chair to you, eyes still trained on his lap and occasionally shifting to your form. Dark, messy mop of hair and a face much more grown than you remember—he’s lovely to look at.

You’ve never seen him agree to a break when you were kids. The memory that surfaces makes you hold back a smile. The school library closed at 6 p.m. and Mark had all the books you needed for finals week by four. The sky used to be a warmer colour and so did your room, though you can’t quite remember the colour of your walls. You remember the hot pink ink you used to doodle with though, and Mark’s tired complaints when you wouldn’t let him study. Half of your doodles were inevitably on his notebook pages.

“You know, I didn’t think we’d meet again this way,” you start, trying to smile.

“Yeah,” he says, opening his mouth to continue but closing it quickly. 

There’s a quiet pause, filled in by the rustling of leaves and the reminiscence of winter winds outside. Late January nights aren’t close enough to winter and yet still, far from spring. You think of third grade, all of a sudden, of the first snow you saw and Mark Lee’s terribly postured snowman. 

“I… didn’t know you were songwriting for idols,” he says, with hesitant punctuation.

You chuckle, looking down at your feet. 

“I- I don’t mean it like that- I mean- I—”

“Mark,” you interrupt the mess that’s leaving his mouth. “It’s okay. You didn’t say anything wrong.”

He scratches the back of his head, looking a little guilty. You can’t really pinpoint exactly what’s going on in the space inside his head and it bothers you more than it should. You have been apart for a long, long time. You’re not as entwined as you used to be, not two peas in a pod anymore and not a matching set.

It feels colder, even in Mark’s modest apartment room.

“We’re friends,” you say. “Since college. Sohee and I. She wanted to sing and I wanted to write.”

“Oh. That’s neat.”

You chuckle. “You get to do both. I’m kind of jealous, you know? You’re talented. You’ve always been good at everything.”

“Oh, come on. That’s not- No way.”

You roll your eyes. “Some people see modesty as incompetence, Mark.”

He blinks, something rekindling inside his eyes, you tell with the way he stares at you.

“Oh my god. Mrs Wilsbury used to tell us that.”

The two of you laugh. It’s not particularly the thought of old Mrs Wilsbury, with her sharp words and shriveled face, but the spark of recognition in Mark’s boyish laugh that makes you feel a trembling inside your chest. 

“She was horrible,” you say, pulling a face.

“She was nice to me though,” Mark defends.

“Everyone was nice to you.”

Mark furrows his eyebrows and you roll your eyes at him trying hard to remember your high school days. The expressions he used to make haven't changed much; he’s just grown up and into his larger, masculine frame. It’s endearing now, more than ever.

He gasps suddenly and scrambles back to his desk, scribbling in a bunch of lines onto the paper. You lean back on the bed, sighing. It’s supposed to be the two of you writing verses but the way Mark works differs so much from yours that you decided it’d be better for him to do his thing while you’ll be the supporting cast. You don’t really mind when you’ve missed his words so much. You don’t really mind if it leads to him.

“Sorry,” he says when he’s done, a little awkward in tone.

A part of you feels sad for him, however. You feel sad that he’s had to work alone all these years as a solo singer-songwriter. It can’t be easy. You know it’s not easy. But Mark—he has a way of making dreams come true. Every kid dreams and yet, your best friend from years ago is living his. Perhaps, it makes things better, easier to look at.

You glance at Mark again, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration and lips pressed together. Something tells you he wants to scowl right now.

“Hey,” you call again, feeling comfortable on his bed now that it’s warm. “What was your debut song again? Dreamer?”

You know the answer. You just don’t want to give in to the feeling that’s calling for proximity again. Things change, and sometimes—most times—they’re out of your hands. 

You should be worried about nosy reporters right now. You in Mark Lee’s own room would give anyone attuned to celebrity news a sickening, sugary treat. A few headlines pop in and you shove them aside. You were surprised by the offer but apparently, his studio merges with his bedroom. (It did take an awkward explanation on his part as to why he invited you to his bedroom.)

Embarrassingly, you wish some of those headlines would come true. Your feelings haven’t changed since you were fifteen. 

His walls are blue like the sky and there’s more than enough lights but he only uses the one at his desk. It’s like a little sun, rays caressing his cheeks, nose and lips with a warm, orange touch. You would make fun of the gamer chair but he said it’s from Lee Donghyuck before you could even start breaking the ice you’re standing on. You wish the warmth would return between the two of you, the faint memory of holding hands in second grade floating in.

“It was Dreamer, yeah.” Mark’s voice breaks you out of your old teenage daydreams. You chuckle to force the heat off your cheeks.

A sudden impulse takes over your cold fingers and you take the acoustic guitar by his bed, playing the opening chords to his debut song. Mark’s eyes widen at your action and you give him your biggest smile—it’s like back then again. It used to be Mark on the bed though, with fingers strumming his worn out guitar and kind smile and honey eyes. You pause your playing. Mark’s still smiling at you in awe and you pat the spot beside you on the bed.

All of a sudden, you desperately wish for the past even if it isn’t meant to be recalled this way. 

You start playing again and Mark mumbles the beginning of the song, unsure, eliciting an annoyed sound from you. You stop playing and glower at him.

“Those aren’t the lyrics,” you say with mock distress. “You’re ruining the song.”

“It’s my song,” he responds with an incredulous laugh.

You begin again, and though Mark has to google his own lyrics, you spend an hour or so figuring out beats and tunes that vaguely resemble feelings you don’t feel anymore and thoughts you only remember empty decorated shells of. You’re not fifteen anymore, or fourteen or thirteen. Someday is now today. You’re not fifteen anymore but being fifteen is a part of you. The music floats seamlessly.

Your cheeks heat up when you think of the last time you met him, when you said you liked him and laughed it off in the awkward teenage fashion. You pray he doesn’t remember that embarrassing parting. It would be too silly an ending.

That’s why when you heard his name from Sohee’s manager, you couldn’t help yourself. After all, old friends should meet up once in their lives, right? You should close the door you left open if you can’t set foot into the house.

“Okay, but I genuinely didn’t know you write songs for Park Sohee,” Mark says, legs crossed on his bed as he leans in a little towards you. The dim lights of his room make his face look more rugged than usual, the tired lines spread across his face. You wonder if he’s kept up his habit of ditching breaks.

“I’m surprised you’re not in a boyband,” you reply, leaning against the wall. “And that your bed is this small.”

Mark stammers out a garbled explanation and you gasp.

“Wait- wait, oh my god. Don’t tell me… don’t tell me you’ve never had anyone over! For, you know...”

The comment runs a deep flush through his cheeks and you giggle at his expression.

“I- I- I just- I just didn’t have the time,” he says, biting down his lower lip possibly at his own awkwardness.

“Looks like you’re still a loser, Mark Lee,” you say, smiling smugly.

He narrows his eyes at you. “Looks like you’re still mean to me, (name).”

“Oh lord, when was I ever mean to you?”

“When were you not?”

You stick out his tongue at him and he laughs, relaxing against the sound of you and him—old friends. It could have been this way; it should have been this way.

“Why did you move away?” is what you want to ask. What was so urgent that you were left staring at the ghosts of his figure in his empty house, in his empty room and at the empty classroom desk? It’s not anger but a soft sense of regret, boosted by his quiet breathing and tired, thoughtful eyes. You could have stayed this way but instead, there’s a rift between the two of you. There’s years and years, and time isn’t a product to sell back and forth—you can’t buy those years back. Your chest hurts but you clutch the feeling tightly in your hands, afraid it might escape.

“This collab means a lot to Sohee,” you say, after a while. “You know, after the hiatus she’s been on.”

“Yeah. Yeah, I totally get it,” he says, sitting up straight and sobering from the bubble of you two. “We should get back to work.”

You hum. “You mean me staring at you tear all your hair out?”

Mark reddens in the face. “I’m not usually like this. Just saying. I need to be... inspired, I guess.”

“Maybe it’s time for you to revive your soundcloud account from when you were twelve,” you say, leaning back against the soft material of the bed.

“You’re making fun of me again,” he says, the smile lines on his face deepening.

You let out a smiling sigh. It’s just so easy. The thought still eats away at you, however, of what could’ve been. If you were younger, you wouldn’t care for this, you suppose. You’d just get along like nothing had passed at all.

“(name).” His voice sounds deeper and softer. “It’s nice having you back. To talk to, you know? It’s been a long time.”

Your face must have fallen because he straightens, eyes wide and wavering lips trying to form words. You sigh, looking away and see his form inch closer, some sort of fuzz leaving his mouth. 

“Mark. Mark.” You shake your head. “I think I’ve been a bad friend. I don’t know why I didn’t keep in touch—”

“Hey,” he interrupts, looking you in the eye. “It’s on me too.”

If you were younger, you would have confessed over and over again in ways private to everyone but you. 

You nod instead. If your childhood together was a prelude, there’s quite the long, awkward silence following it. You have to start the music soft and slow.

“It worked out though, didn’t it?” you ask, looking up to find his face nearer to yours than you would have expected.

When he tilts his head, you explain further, “We’re both doing fine, right? We- We did things, got our life and plans set and… now we’re here.”

Mark leans away from you. “I- I guess.”

There’s a pause, and you know there’s a lie fluttering between the two of you.

“I… I still feel like I’m running,” he says, a weary undertone carrying his voice forth. “I know I’ve done things… achieved things and I still- I still feel like I’m running a marathon. There’s still something out of reach.”

You scoot closer to him and offer a smile, your hand resting on his shoulder. 

“You can say you’re tired. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“Thanks, (name). I appreciate it. I just don’t know where I’m going anymore.”

You give his shoulder a gentle squeeze before pulling him into a hug. You can’t hear his breathing over the sound of your pulse drumming in your ears but it’s warm, at the very least. His arms wrap around you after a few moments, heavy but comforting when his hand holds the back of your head, just like old times. The fabric of his mellow green hoodie is warm with his skin and you bury your face into it deeper.

“I’ve worked alone for a really long time,” he whispers. “It’s nice like this. I wish… I sometimes wish we could go back.”

You giggle, looking back up. “We could build a snowman for old times’ sake.”

Mark furrows his eyebrows. “There’s literally no snow. Besides, you just want to make fun of my snowman. Again.”

“You remember that?”

“Of course.”

His cheeks colour, one of his hands leaving your torso to scratch the back of his head. Suddenly aware of the lack of space, you pull back slightly to a more decent enough distance. Mark frowns but he rests his palm against the bedsheet, leaning his torso onto it.

“You could also let me draw in your songbook for the memories,” you suggest, smiling wide. “In hot pink.”

Mark scoffs. “Oh no. I know what you’re trying to do.”

“I’m not as immature as you think, Mark.” You roll your eyes. “It’s not like I’m going to draw a bunch of hot pink dicks.”

Mark opens his mouth and closes it. “I wasn’t- I wasn’t suggesting that.”

One look from you, however, and he realizes his defeat. It’s almost the same look as the one in spring break after tenth grade, except much happier and more carefree. Your eyes shift elsewhere when you remember the argument you laughed off, details lost but the gist was clear. You acted as though it didn’t matter if he moved away—something about that happy-go-lucky persona you’d developed. Oh god, you were an idiot.

The silence isn’t welcome. There’s no rhythm, no melodies in moments like these—moments in between things that should be happening and won’t ever happen. Mark takes a sudden precise intake of breath, making you look at him. His eyes are rich and resolute, and somehow as pure as they were when he was younger.

“When you- when you said you liked me,” Mark begins, and you hold your breath. “When we were fifteen, you said you liked me. Before I moved. I- I don’t really know if you were joking but… Do you- do you think you still would? If we started over?”

You look at him, his eyes unable to meet yours and shoulders tense, and find yourself at a loss for words and for breath. 

“Sorry,” he says quickly. “Stupid question.”

“I- I do- I would.”

Mark looks up at you reluctantly, almond eyes shimmering with some sort of emotion—innocent and curious as though you’re fifteen again.

You cough awkwardly and he looks away in a similar panicked fashion. This isn’t as romantic as you thought it would be and you almost think about taking your words back.

No. Not again. 

“I would,” you continue, dragging the syllable. “If you maybe asked me out on a date, at least.”  

Mark blinks, slack jawed like he’s seen the birth of a phoenix, or something equally dreamlike.

“Yes! I mean, wait- I- uh…”

He clears his throat, cheeks flushing with scarlet heat. “Do you- do you wanna get coffee tomorrow? No, wait- it’s a Monday. Th-This Saturday? …I’m doing this all wrong, aren’t I?”

You can’t hold back your laughter anymore, clutching your stomach at the sheepish look on Mark’s face and his slouched shoulders, much like the ones you were used to seeing as a stressed, sleep-deprived teenager. 

“We can make time after this project.” You smile.

“We have to wait until after—no, I mean, that’s totally cool.”

The defeated grin makes you laugh some more. Your eyes drift to the deserted work desk and notebook paper, and you gasp. Dawn will arrive at this rate, crashing in waves.

“We really should get back to work,” you tell him, your fingers against his chest. “Twelve year old us would be very disappointed in us now.”

The two of you laugh in shared memory, of the time when romance was as appealing as ice-cream dropped on the sidewalk. With eyes full of stars and a head full of clouds, where do you go? Right back to each other, you think. 

“We’ve come a long way,” you marvel. “We used to think of a different future every five minutes. Me, more than you, perfect poster boy.”

“You wanted to be an astronaut,” he laughs.

“And you wanted to be a swimmer. Said you’d even swim in a lake in Russia. In winter.”

“Yeah, I remember,” he says, eyes faraway. “We had all those childhood dreams.”

“You’ve reached one of them,” you respond, laughing.

There’s a short pause. Back then, everything was visionary. What the two of you had in mind had evolved, molted, shed its skin but now you’re here, in each other’s arms again—in a way that you haven't been before.

“It’s two,” he whispers, and the next thing you know, his lips are on yours and his arms are around your waist, pulling you closer. 

He pulls back in wide-eyed, careful consideration. “I- I meant to ask first.”

You respond with a kiss, his mouth warm against yours. 

He pulls back again.

“That was cheesy, wasn’t it?”

“Just shut up and kiss me, oh my god.”

You can’t help it, smiling against his lips and making him laugh at the feeling. Your finger brushes over the mole on his neck, unchanging in the same way he still uses too many hand gestures to talk or the way he still likes to lean his head on your shoulder. 

There are unchanged parts of him so vivid in your memories that some time through the night, you wonder if you’re dreaming. Then a terribly executed joke later, you have to nudge him with your elbow or smack his arm—and it falls into place in your reality again. Maybe you could’ve saved time; but it’s so much sweeter this way.

#mark lee x reader #nct mark x reader #nct x reader #cznnet #nct scenarios #mark lee scenarios #mark lee soft hours #nct mark scenarios #nct fluff #mark lee fanfic #mark lee fluff #nct 127 x reader #nct dream x reader #nct dream fluff #moonwrites #ok yes im obsessed with perfecting this relationship dynamic but can you blame me #it's perfect #the angst the pining the fear on the ledge between friends and strangers #im going to die with this <3333 #o god i rlly dont know how to end fics

[jtrbluv]

we’re not really strangers | pjm

summary: We’re Not Really Strangers is a purpose-driven card game and movement all about empowering meaningful connections. Three carefully crafted levels of questions and wildcards that allow you to deepen your existing relationships and create new ones. Ready?

or alternatively,

your furtive infatuation with your lifelong best friend proves to be hard to suppress when there’s (1) alcohol involved and (2) a card game that forces you to reveal more about yourself than you could ever wish for. in short, no, you are not ready.

[friends to lovers!au]

pairing: jimin x reader

genre: fluff, crack, slight angst

word count: 8.7k

warnings: swearing, alcohol consumption, two emotionally constipated best friend, PG-15

A/N: hi, i’ve been really excited about this fic for a while, and i’m genuinely so happy that i finally finished it! the card game is in fact real and i got inspired for this fic after i had played the game with a couple of friends myself. AHEM! @koushiningg​ ! we both cried and i do highly recommend to play it! but anyways, i hope you enjoy this fic because i had a lot of fun writing it! sending love always... jumi out!

EDIT: @bangtans-peaceful-piegon​ i’d also like to thank the lovely pidge for beta reading this 4 me as well! PIDGE I FUCKIN LOB U!!! 

PLAYLIST ; SEQUEL

♤ ♤ ♤

Not once in your life did you ever imagine a simple card game to become the bane of your existence. 

Yet Park Jimin was able to prove you wrong. 

Let’s play ‘We’re Not Really Strangers’ he said. It’ll be fun, he said.

You stare down at the card in front of you—everything else in your periphery was blurry in vision and you can audibly pinpoint the erratic beating of your heart. 

The card was practically taunting you, laughing in your face. It was as if there was a sentient being in the room who was aware of your own subconscious and the not so latent feelings you had for the boy sitting in front of you. 

Same said being loved to constantly place you in a state of trepidation concerning your current situation—your blood pressure skyrocketing—nearly feeling the muscular pink thing inside of you thrusting itself against your ribcage. 

The white card with crimson red writing made sure to leave an impact, making you feel the most ridiculed you’ve felt all night which says a lot—leaving your mind in a complete frenzy although you refused to let it be known. 

And so you sat there. Fiddling the card in between your fingers, feigning nonchalance. You were very much on the brink of cracking your facade—your sanity practically crumbling as the minutes ticked by. You didn’t think you’d last this long to be honest. Yet an hour and a half proved to be way too straining on your body, especially your heart. 

He simply sat there with his hands folded on the table—void of emotion, whistling a familiar top 50s tune you couldn’t quite put your finger on. You considered shifting your focuses on trying to comprehend the tune—hoping it would ease the concerning state of apprehension you were in. 

But then you remember that you aren’t that pathetic. Even though you both had probably been sitting in complete silence for about two minutes now. Up to the point where you could probably hear the crickets chirping outside his apartment, except the only sound that was filling your ears was your own conscience telling you how idiotic you were being. 

Your face may be gradually morphing the same shade of crimson as the writing inscribed onto the card itself, and you may have a whole line of sweat encompassing your hairline. But it’s just a stupid little card game. You could say any stupid little answer and the stupid not-so-little boy wouldn’t care. He wouldn’t care. So you shouldn’t care. 

When did you become so pathetic after all?

-one hour and a half ago-

“Why can’t we just play Mario Kart or Uno? This sounds like there’s too much thinking involved,” you whine, leaning against the side of his couch. 

“One, we always play that. And two, I always lose,” he grumbles, plopping down onto the floor.

Jimin rests his back on the frame of the couch as he sits in the small gap made by the large piece of furniture and the coffee table that resided in front of it. You decide to sit on the floor as well, around an arm’s length away from your friend. He places the red box down onto the table—opening the cap and revealing the contents with a mischievous glint in his irises. 

Within the box was a deck of cards, separated into three piles with two pencils on either side. Knowing Jimin, you assumed this game had an ulterior motive you were unaware of, and by the title of the game, you could already tell that you weren’t going to like it very much. 

“How do you even play this?” You ask, causing him to look up in return.

He bites his lip, taking a couple seconds to ponder on your question, “I don’t know it’s my first-time playing too,” he shrugs. “I was watching Jin and Namjoon playing it a couple of weeks ago and for some reason, Jungkook started crying.”

“He is a sap,” you hum in agreement, thinking in retrospect of Jungkook crying from various situations such as Iron Man dying or that one time Jin farted on his pillow and he got pink eye for a whole week. 

“The biggest,” he concurs, “Hm, there’s no instructions in here.” He mutters while shuffling through the cards. 

“Why don’t you just search it up?” You suggest, sliding the box to yourself as he nods and fishes his phone out of his pocket. 

While holding the box in the palm of your hand, you scan the contents—turning it around in your palm until your eyes narrow in on the words printed at the bottom. 

“Oh, it says something here.”

His head perks up. “Hm? What is it?”

You clear your throat at the sight of the long explanation. “We’re Not Really Strangers is a purpose-driven card game and movement all about empowering meaningful connections. Three carefully crafted levels of questions and wildcards that allow you to deepen your existing relationships and create new ones.” You internally grimace at the words. The game hasn’t even started and you already had a bad feeling about it all. “Ready?” You say through clenched teeth, purposely keeping your head hung low. 

Jimin’s lips quirk up into a cheerful grin, unaware of the piercing stare you were giving him. “Okay, I think I got it,” he declares, eyes zeroed in on his phone once more, ”There’s three levels—perception, connection, and reflection. Each level we pass, the deeper and more thought-provoking the questions get. Helping us make a deeper connection and get to know each other better yadda yadda yadda.”

You nod in understanding, sliding the box of cards back towards him—forcing the grimace that kept threatening to plaster itself onto your face into a small, smug smile. 

“The first thing we have to do,” he begins, taking out two pencils and two small pieces of paper, “is write messages to each other. We won’t be able to open these until after we leave.” He explains, sliding a pencil and paper towards you.

“Wow, very cryptic,” you tut, biting down on your bottom lip before more distasteful remarks decided to leave your lips. He doesn’t catch your reaction or your comment though because he’s already got his pencil in his hand, scribbling vigorously onto the tiny piece of paper. Knowing him it could very well be nonsensical insults and doodles, or a whole essay about your friendship and what you mean to him. Most likely ludicrous and full of thought, either way, just like him. 

Without much thought, you lazily jot onto the paper.

know that i love u, u fucker <3 

-y/n

The sound of your pencil falling against the table causes him to look up at you, eyes knit together in confusion. 

“You’re done already?”

You chuckle, “I mean, I wasn’t going to write an essay. You already know how I feel about you. But it seems like you’re writing one though.”

His eyes narrow in on you—giving you an indiscernible look before letting out a small ‘hmph’ and lowering his focus back down to his pencil and paper. You dismiss his enigmatic behavior—deciding to mindlessly scroll on your phone while waiting for him to finish his MLA formatted essay.

Two minutes pass and you hear the sound of his pencil being placed onto the table. “Done.”

“You added citations too right?”

He scoffs, “No, but i’ll gladly add some if you’d like.” 

You roll your eyes for what seems like the umpteenth time in the last five minutes, “Just start the goddamn game.”

He takes the first stack of cards and shuffles them between his hands. “In all three levels, there are wild cards or basically dares we have to complete. And for each level, we get two ‘dig deeper’ cards. Pretty self-explanatory. So this is the perception level. It’s basically designed for first encounters and strangers, and we’re gonna be asking each other questions about ourselves.”

Your eyes widen at the whole confidentiality of it all. “Are we going through all of those cards?” You blurt out, staring at what seemed to be like 50 cards in his hands. 

“Oh no,” he quickly refutes, “It would take hours. We’ll just do like 12 cards each.”

“Alright,” you huff, letting out a small breath of relief. 

“Yay! Okay I’ll go first,” he beams, his toothy smile evident as he places the deck in between the two of you while grabbing a card from the top, “What do you think my name is?”

You snort at the conspicuousness of the question, “Jamal.”

He immediately guffaws at your response, throwing his head back in addition. “Hey, I don’t mind that.”

“Are all of the questions like this?” You say in between hushed laughter. 

“Nah,” he shakes his head as you pick up another card from the deck, “now you ask me.”

“Alright, what’s the first thing you noticed about me?” You ask, slightly taken aback by the sudden earnestness of the question, causing you to become genuinely curious about what his answer was going to be.

He hums, taking a second to think it through. “I think your smile and your laugh. It’s always been really contagious since the day I met you.” He admits, almost matter-of-factly as if it was something you should’ve known by now, yet you did not. 

Your heart nearly disintegrates into a puddle of goop right then and there, but you manage to conceal your reaction, “Aw, you actually like me.” You tease. 

He scoffs with a playful grin on his lips. “Don’t flatter yourself. You still cackle like a damn hyena.”

Your eyebrows shoot up, “At least I don’t laugh at every single of Jin’s lame ass jokes.”

He gasps, jaw slack open due to your all too accurate truthbomb, “I did not ask to be attacked in my own residence.”

“Well, what are you gonna do about it then.”

He snorts. “Holy shit, do you remember when I banged my head on the corner of his coffee table.” 

“How could I forget? I had the picture of the bump on your head as my lockscreen for like a month.” You reminisce, resisting the urge to pull up the picture from your phone.

“Yeah, and that same month I bought and rotated between the same 10 hats.”

“Hey! It genuinely didn’t look as bad as you thought.”

He whips his head towards you, giving you a piercing glare that made you want to redact your statement immediately. 

He grins from ear to ear, the little shit, amused at the reaction he was able to garner from you. 

“Aha!” He suddenly guffaws, shooting out of the floor and prancing towards his fridge. He then takes out three bottles of lychee-flavored soju and makes his way back towards the table. 

Jimin being the borderline alcoholic he is, it doesn’t come as a surprise to you. Not even after he takes another trip back to the fridge to grab yet another three bottles of soju, mango-flavored to be exact. He has probably one of the stupidest grins etched onto his face as he held onto the bottles—meanwhile you were more concerned about the possibility of having to clean up a bunch of broken glass and wasted soju. Then again, it wouldn’t be the first time. 

“And do you plan on drinking all of this by yourself?” you say, gesturing towards the bottles.

“I know my liver is strong, but I don’t buy this shit just to enjoy alone,” he retorts. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees you shake your head as you click your tongue, “Playing this while tipsy just sounds ten times better don’t you think?.”

You shrug—although you had a strong hunch for what he was insinuating, “I mean I guess.”

He starts to pour soju into his shot glass, stopping just before it hits the brim. He slides the glass to you and you take it into your hand, eyeing the sparkling fluid and thinking about the way the contents would do its little all-too-familiar dance on your tongue. 

“Well, you know what they say,” he says, pouring a glass for himself, “drunk words are sober thoughts,” he finishes while dragging out the last word—downing the first shot in one quick swig. You follow his lead soon thereafter, refusing to let your mind linger on what he had just said and the viable likelihood of you spewing out the words that could just make or break your longstanding friendship and lead to a lifetime of regret. 

Obviously, everything’s going fine and dandy for you.

-

The next 20 minutes consisted of a plethora of superficial questions that would vary from:

“What's your favorite song lyric you can think of off the top of your head?”

Your head shoots up as if the lightbulb in your head just flashed on. “Easy. Shawty’s like a melody in my head that i cant keep out got me singing like-“

He lunges over to clap a hand over your mouth before you could sing the next line. “Na na na na no Y/N. Please stop.”

Or something along the lines of:

“What character do you think I'd play in a movie?” He asks with a smug smile. 

“You’d be the second male lead that everyone secretly wants to end up with the main character because you act all sweet and kind and and genuinely cares about her but instead she chooses the other guy because something about him draws her in and it was her ‘gut instinct’ or some shit like that.”

“So I would get second male lead syndrome?” He reiterates. 

“Yes.” 

He sets his shot glass back down with a glower, clearly taken aback. “That is the biggest insult I’ve ever gotten in my entire life.”

You also couldn’t forget about:

“Oh, this one says to create a secret handshake.”

“No.” You deadpan.

“And why not?”

“Your pinky‘s the size of a vienna sausa—“ 

He smacks you square in the cheek with a pillow before you could finish your sentence. You don’t even fight back because your mind was so slow to process what he had just done. The fact that you only slept for 5 hours last night didn’t help whatsoever. Your evident lack of energy causes him to jab his finger into your side, causing a loud shriek—your fight or flight response starts kicking in as you grab the back of his neck and slam his face against the fabric of the couch cushion. 

-

Soju was never able to make the two of you full on drunk—buzzed of course, but not enough for complete incoherency. And so you both down a bottle each before finishing the first round. 

“I’m surprised we didn’t get any wild cards that round,” he says while resting his head on the couch.

You purse your lips, “You spoke too soon.” 

His eyes flash open as he cranes his neck in an attempt to see the card. “Wait actually?”

You can feel your insides churn as you read the words in front of you, and you were sure that it wasn’t the alcohol talking. “Write down the three most important things to you in a relationship for 30 seconds and then compare.”

Jimin reaches over to grab two pieces of paper and pencils while unlocking his phone to find the timer app, “Okay, I’ll put a timer on for 30 seconds starting… now.”

And so the internal monologue in your head begins. 

Three most important things… only three? That’s not anywhere near enough to suffice. Wait, what would the first one even be… oh yeah, trust. Trust is very much important yes, yes, yes. What else? Um, communication? Yes of course, that’s essential. Okay, what would the last one be? 

You sneak a glance over at Jimin. His cheek is squished against the palm of his hand, making his cheek fat (an area in which he lacked in) more prominent and the pink, plush flesh of his lips appear even bigger than they already were. 

The ceiling light emitted a faint, ambient glow—the lights and shadows hitting all the slopes and curves of his face. You never understood how someone could be so effortlessly stunning. Even the mess atop his head that’s supposed to be his hair looks purposely tousled—the ebony strands sticking up in multiple directions was framing his temples and contrasted with the honey-like hues of his skin. 

Unlike the glow that radiated from the lights of the worn-down apartment and the radiance of whatever was beyond the glass of the window behind him, everything about him seemed to glow much brighter.

“Hello, earth to Y/N, your 30 seconds is up.” He interrupts pointedly, waving a hand in front of your face.

Blinking rapidly, you shake your head as well as all preceding thoughts that definitely weren’t consuming your mind a few seconds ago, “Sorry w-what?”

He laughs at your disoriented state, “Did you finish writing your three things?”

No, I wrote your name as number 3. “Yeah, I did. You can go first though.”

He nods with a small smile. “Oh, okay then let’s see. First, I put trust. I don’t know, I think everyone puts that to be honest. After that, I put communication. I feel like that’s just a given y’know. Another thing I feel like most people would say.”

You utter a timid “mhm” under your breath albeit zoning out and being unaware of what he was saying. Opportunely, you managed to scribble out his name with the mere seconds that had passed and now you were tapping the lead point of the pencil against the paper, littering the page with a bunch of grey, little dots—incognizant to the fact that he had his eyes focused on you the whole time. 

“I didn’t really know what to put last. Three things isn’t anywhere near enough in my opinion. But at the last second, I wrote down vulnerability,” he continues.

You look up upon hearing the last word. “Oh wow, that’s good. I didn’t even think about that.”

He chuckles unabashedly, clearly pleased with your reaction. “Right? I just figured. At first, I thought it would go in the same category as trust but then I thought about it more. Yeah, you can trust someone and someone can trust you, but to what extent does that all go to. Where does it start? And where does it even end? You need to be able to open up to the person I feel like. So I guess trust and vulnerability go hand in hand.”

Impressed with his words, you decide to chime in.  “Wouldn’t communication go along with it too?”

“Hm?”

You place your pencil down. “You would open up to each other by means of communication, becoming more vulnerable, and then overall gaining more trust in the end.”

His brows raise at your sudden revelation, “Wait, you’re so right, did you just wax poetic and full cycle all that?.”

You smile, “I mean I guess,” you respond humbly, “ it does make sense though, does it not?”

He hums in agreement while downing another shot, “It applies to us, right?”

You force out a chuckle, but it comes out a lot more faux-sounding than you would’ve liked. “Haha, yeah I guess it does, doesn’t it.” Once again, starting to dive deeper into the abyss of pitiful hope and unrequitedness. 

“Describe your perfect day.” He suddenly interjects.

You quirk a brow. “Didn’t I just go?”

“It’s okay, I’ll go for this one too.”

“Alright,” you say, foot tapping on the wooden floor as you look past him and out into the glass window of his living room, “well, I wouldn’t have school of course. And I think it would all depend on how I feel that day. If I was feeling particularly lazy, the day would probably consist of me binge-watching shows in bed while eating a shitton of carbs. And the other case would probably be galavanting around the city or going to an amusement park with friends.”

Jimin listens intently and smiles as you speak, causing you to avoid his stare before pigment threatened to rush to your cheeks, “Both of those scenarios sound really nice. I better be included too.”

You roll your eyes, turning away to hide the grin creeping up your cheeks, “We’ll see.”

He groans, standing up from his spot on the floor and falling onto his couch instead, “My asscheeks hurt.”

Your face contorts into a look of disgust, “And you want me to do what with that information?”

Scoffing lightly, he leans back into the cushions and tilts his head back, “It was a declaration, not a cry for help.”

“Yeah, and it’s the bony ass for me.”

His head perks up. “It’s having a flatter ass than their guy best friend for me.”

Gulping down the sad but unequivocal truth, “It’s kissing up to every teacher’s ass for me.”

His eyes narrow in pure chagrin, “It’s the crying on your teacher’s doorstep for them to round your grade for me.”

“It’s splitting your pants on orientation day for me.”

“Fuck you, people would pay to see this ass! It’s getting a concussion from falling down the main hall stairs for me.”

“For fuck’s sake, I told you that they waxed the floors that day!” You snap back.

“Okay, and who said it was a good idea to walk down three flights of stairs while trying to cram for a midterm? Yeah, exactly no one.” He says incisively, giving you an even bigger urge to push him off of the couch, yet you digress. 

“This could go on for hours.” You heave out.

“Is that the sound of someone giving up I’m hearing?”

“Is that the sound of a midget I’m hearing?”

“But I’m taller than you?!” He screeches petulantly, smacking your shoulder. You burst out into a fit of laughter—toppling onto the wooden floor with pure malice. 

Gasping for air, you attempt to stifle your laughter and regain your breath. “Wow, I’m on a roll today! I deserve another shot.”

He shakes his head, his anger quelling at the sight of your giddiness. “Remind me to not let you drink and play this game.”

You turn over from your side to lay on your back. “This will be the first and the last time I play this game with you.” You say almost immediately—the words involuntarily slipping from your mouth before you could stop it. 

He sinks in his spot on the couch, brows knitting at your comment. “Why?”

Sobriety crashes into you like a colossal wave —your irritation dissipates almost immediately. The exaggerated tone your voice begins to register through your head—as well as the fact that you sounded a lot more disapproving than you intended. 

Groaning at your hindered ability to think and process properly, you attempt to clear the air, “Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. We just... practically know everything about each other I guess. What else is there to know?”

He hums. “You sure about that?”

What? “Wait what?”

“Nothing,” he chuckles awkwardly, “next question.”

The straightforwardness of the next question causes you to quirk a brow, “How are you, really?”

His eyes widen. “Well, that’s a deep one, isn’t it?”

You smile. “A little.” 

He sighs, a small grin lacing his features, “Hm, how am I,” he affirms, adjusting himself in his spot on the couch, “I feel content with where I am right now, I guess. Things can always be better, but at the same time they could be worse too.”

Your number one defense mechanism as of late has been to constantly tease and make jokes at the poor guy—essentially using him as your own mental punching bag. He went along with it out of the assumption that it was all caused by your stress from school while you knew the true origins of your behavior. 

You smile at his optimism, "Hey, that's always good to hear."

He chuckles, shifting his position on the couch so he could face you directly, "I don't know, maybe it's the new sense of freedom. Or all the amazing people I've gotten to meet and the opportunities that are offered here. Or the fact that I'm still going to the same school as my best friend after all this damn time."

"Chim, don't get sappy on me man." You warn him while pouting exaggeratedly— slumping onto the frame of the couch while he takes a strand of your hair in between his fingers. You bask in the moment, your eyes shutting close. 

"Hey, I'm just being honest! For some reason, it all makes up for the impending student debt and draining lectures and professors that have a superiority complex as fat as their paycheck."

"Too bad their paycheck still isn't as fat as your ass."

An audible gasp coming from the only other person in the room causes your eyes to flutter open.

"Aw," he coos, ruffling the hair atop of your head, "that’s the nicest thing you’ve said to me all night. Admit it, you love me."

Out of instinct, you opt to stick your tongue at him instead of replying with a witty comeback. You turn away from him before mumbling to yourself, "More than you'll ever know buddy."

"What was that?"

Shit. "Nothing. Next question!"

-

After twenty questions and a whopping 10 empty soju bottles later, you are quite literally about to implode.

Your eyes stare down at the card in front of you—everything that surrounds it is blurry in vision and you can audibly pinpoint the erratic beating of your heart.

The card was practically taunting you, laughing in your face. It was as if there was a sentient being in the universe who was aware of your own subconscious and the not so latent feelings you had for the boy sitting in front of you. Same said being loved to constantly place you in a state of trepidation concerning your current situation—your blood pressure skyrocketing—nearly feeling the muscular pink thing inside of you thrusting itself against your ribcage.

The imminent headache was starting to spread towards your temples and you practically felt like you could feel your brain shifting inside your head at this point. Although you felt groggy, you were certain that your heart was at a rate that is way faster than it should be. And sitting on your legs has caused them to lose all feeling from the tips of your toes all the way up to your kneecaps. One attempt at standing and you would come crashing to the floor in a heartbeat.

The white card with crimson red writing made sure to leave an impact, making you feel the most ridiculed you’ve felt all night which says a lot—leaving your mind in a complete frenzy although you refused to let it be known.

To say you were mad was an understatement. Out of all the times throughout the entirety of this hour and a half that you were playing this game, he decided that now would be the best time to use his 'dig deeper' card.

There it was.

Admit something.

"Okay fine, I was the one who stuck pink hair dye in your shampoo last semester."

"Y/N, did you really think I didn't know? C’mon I know there’s something else in there.”

You scowl, brows furrowing, “Why would I keep something from you?”

“Why are you getting so defensive over this?”

"What the hell is there for me to admit to you?" You snap back in exasperation, the harsh tone of your voice rendering the two of you speechless. 

He averts his gaze, closing his eyes while inhaling a deep sigh. "Ever since we started college, why have you been treating me so differently?"

Your eyes widen in disbelief, stumped. Yet you refuse to wither out of this. 

 "I– are you mad?"

"No. Of course not," he quickly digresses, softening his gaze, "I just noticed after all this time that you've only been acting differently towards me. Did I do something wrong?"

"No, you didn't do anything wrong Jimin. You never have."

His eyes narrow, giving you yet another indecipherable look, "I'm using my 'dig deeper' card." He deadpans.

And so you sat there. Fiddling the card in between your fingers, feigning nonchalance. You were very much on the brink of cracking your facade—your sanity practically crumbling as the minutes ticked by. You didn’t think you’d last this long, to be honest. Yet an hour and a half proved to be way too straining on you in a variety of different ways.

He simply sat there with his hands folded on the table—void of emotion, whistling a familiar top 50s tune you couldn’t quite put your finger on.

You considered shifting your focuses on trying to comprehend the tune—hoping it would ease the concerning state of apprehension you were in. But then you assured yourself that you haven't reached that level of patheticism yet.

Even though you both had probably been sitting in complete silence for about two minutes now —practically anyone else could detect was the crickets chirping outside his apartment, yet the only sound that was filling your eardrums was your own conscience telling you how idiotic you were being.

This was it. There was no point in trying to weasel yourself out of this situation. If you tried, your more than futile attempt could very well end up causing more problems than if you were to go with the latter.

So instead of constantly wracking your brain with witty banter and deceitful ways to gaslight your feelings for the man sitting in front of you, you come to terms with the fact that your time had run out. You internally commend yourself for putting up a good fight, as well as internally become accosted at how immature you were at handling the whole situation.

You sharply inhale through your nose, peering at the man sitting in front of you as his eyes meet your own, "Alright."

He offers you a small yet empathetic smile in return, giving you the tiniest sliver of reassurance. His hand pats the couch cushion next to him, motioning for you to sit down next to him.

You push yourself up from the floor, immediately propping a leg onto the couch to avoid your numb limbs to be the cause of your embarrassment.

You inhale slowly through your nose and out through your mouth. "This is going to sound really absurd. Like more than absurd. Possibly borderline hysterical." No Y/N, why would you say that?

He interjects, placing a hand on your forearm. "I'm beginning to think you're becoming borderline hysterical," he lets out a small chuckle, "slow down Y/N. One thought at a time."

Your jaw is still slack open due to your previous rambling. "I'm sorry, I just—I don't think I've ever felt this anxious… around you at least."

He bites his lip, eyes trailing away from yours as he tries to think of a way to aid you, "Will it help if I turn around?

"Maybe." You reply timidly, smiling to yourself as his back came into view.

“It’ll be pretty funny if we don’t remember this in the morning,” you start off with, “I shouldn’t be saying that either I’m sorry. Stupid alcohol.”

He snickers at your drunken state, it was adorable. “Pretend I’m not here Y/N. Like you’re talking to a wall.” He advises, back still turned. 

You nod although he can’t see you. “Okay. Well, hi Mr. Wall. I’ve been keeping a secret from my best friend for as long as I’ve known him and I don’t know what to do about it. I’ve suppressed it all this time in hopes that it would eventually fade away, and it almost did. No really, it actually almost did. But now it’s back again and all the same feelings came, but like freaking twofold. No, tenfold. No, like a hundred fucking fold.”

Jimin tries excruciatingly hard to stifle his laughter, cupping a hand to his mouth so he wouldn’t move and distract you.

“I’m literally in love with my freaking best friend when I know he doesn’t see me in that light nor will he ever. If he did, we wouldn’t be where we are right now because I am so shitty at hiding my feelings that I am more than certain that I’ve let the truth slip a couple of times.” You say all in one breath.

He slowly detaches his hand from his mouth, eyebrows raising in disbelief in the words you had just said. His body urges him to turn around. Yet you continue to think out loud. So he digresses. 

“Towards the end of high school, I think my feelings started to become more dormant because I had become more concerned over finishing high school and transitioning into college. I was content and I convinced myself that my feelings were fleeting for once.” You begin with, allowing whatever thoughts that you consumed your mind to spill all out for Mr. Wall to hear. 

You sigh, taking a pillow from his couch and squeezing onto it for dear life. “That was until we ended up getting into our top picks and going to the same school. I couldn’t believe it. My stupid head tried to convince me that life had always just paired the two of us up together for some reason. And that maybe, just maybe I had a chance. But whatever I guess. I don’t know.”

A notification causes your eyes to trail to your phone. Really, Professor La, this is not a good time to tell me to finish my research paper. You swipe at the notification, revealing your lock screen—a photo of you and Jimin at an amusement park back at your hometown, sporting matching university hoodies with bright smiles on your faces that were captured mid-laughter.

Setting your phone down, you lean into the couch—letting your head fall into the cushions as your eyelids slowly start to droop shut. “What also didn’t help is how college life just seems to suit him perfectly. He just always looks so happy now. Like yeah, he’s always been a social butterfly. Yet in addition to that he has top notch grades. He charms professors. For fuck’s sake the Dean treats him like a son. His passion, his laughter, his love, his happiness. It’s always been so infectious. But college just made the effect he has on people grow even stronger. I-,” you stammer, pausing breathlessly, “it just looks like he truly belongs here. Like college was just made for him.”

He sits there in a complete stupor—still trying to process all the words that he had just heard. His body is itching to turn around, take you into his arms, whisper soft nothings into your ear. Anythings. Everything. He never wanted you to feel anxious about his feelings for you ever again.  

“Mr. Wall, that was a lot, I’m sorry. But I’m really… really tired.” You utter quietly, a long yawn escaping your lips. You fall asleep. 

Ten seconds pass until Jimin sneaks a glance over his shoulder, scanning your body as he notices your shut eyes and timid grip on his pillow. 

“Y/N?”

You’re unresponsive. 

He grins at the sight. Getting up from his seat, he makes his way toward you—slowly prying the pillow from your grasp as you carefully slides his hands under your body and picks you up from the couch. 

Instinctively, you wrap your arms around his neck and bury your face into his shoulder as he carries you to his bedroom. You are very much still asleep, yet you always had the habit of needing something to hold onto while you were unconscious. 

Kicking the sheets aside, he makes room for you to lie down as he gently places you onto his bed. He quickly scurries to the other side, slipping into the covers himself as he lays down beside you. 

The sudden contact causes you to shift in your sleep—suddenly wrapping an arm around his torso. He lays there, completely stunned at your actions and begins to heavily debate whether he should give into his desires or not. 

The internal conflict lasts about two seconds before he turns to his side—placing his free hand on the small of your back and pulling you into his chest, leaving a small pocket of space in between your two bodies. 

Unknowingly, you close the gap almost immediately—nestling your head into the crook of his neck as your arm that was lazily slung over his torso starts to tighten its hold around his body. 

His arm slings over your unconscious form, his hands making his way to your back as he basks in the foreign feeling, being this close in proximity to you. It was different. Yet it almost felt like it was where he belonged. And he was scared because he didn’t want it to end. 

While gently placing his chin on the top of your head, he begins to stroke your hair as fatigue starts to wash over him as well. “Things will make sense soon Y/N, I swear.”

He retracts, craning his neck in an attempt to see your sleeping form. His attempt proves to be futile when an indecipherable groan leaves your lips—brows knitting slightly and lips curling downward from the sudden lack of warmth. 

His soft laughter fills the room as he obliges—carefully pressing a small kiss to your forehead before reverting back to his original position. 

“For now, just know that I love you too.”

-

The intolerable throbbing sensation in your temples caused you to stir in your sleep.

The only events you could recall from last night was being at Jimin’s apartment, playing that stupid card game, and downing the most soju you’ve ever had in one sitting.

It only occurs to you that you’re wrapped in someone’s arms when you open your eyes and the only thing in your periphery is a firm chest, steadily heaving each time they take a breath.

Your legs were messily entangled with theirs—arms slung around each other’s torsos as you felt a strange yet dense weight on the top of your head.

Carefully, you try to pry yourself from their grasp albeit your haphazard state of mind. You pull back ever so slightly, making sure not to wake them up in the process, discovering that the excess weight was actually their chin that had been resting on top of your head. Their fingers were still twined in your hair as you pulled back, making you freeze in your spot. Curious, you tilt your head, peering upwards and catching a glimpse of their face.

The boy is undoubtedly still asleep. Eyes shut and ample lips slightly parted. Your timid movement, to your luck, which hadn’t phased him in the slightest, as he was unperceptive and nearly immobile at this point. 

If it weren't for your abhorrent headache and the even more abhorrent symptoms that had rooted from your hangover, it would be an understatement to say that you would be freaking out right about now.  In reality,

You'd be in a complete state of manic.

Because of the fact that your body was paying for the despicable amount of alcohol you had decided to consume the night before, an influx of any intense emotion would cause your body to exacerbate itself even more. And the last thing you needed was to puke all over the poor guy after sleeping together for the first time.

While you were physically experiencing withdrawals, your mind felt slightly inebriated nonetheless. You weren't quite sure if it was from last night's affluence of liquor or the way everything's starting to come back to you. And the longer your eyes linger on the boy's face, the clearer everything starts to become. From the foolish banter to your childish outbursts leading up to your intoxicated yet conscientious confession.

You left your heart all out for him to witness last night, and now the only thing you could do is wait for a response.

Taking a deep sigh, you retreat back to his body—deciding not to ponder any longer on the matter and wait until you had felt physically capable of doing so. 

-

Steaming hot streams of water splash against his back. He stands under the shower head while massaging soap into his hair, replaying the events that had happened last night on loop. 

The words that left your mouth were engraved into his mind as they involuntarily kept replaying over and over again—particularly your inebriated confession, which kept garnering the same reaction of both hope and frustration within him. 

The solution should be simple. In reality it is, yet he still felt so internally scattered. 

“—he doesn’t see me in that light nor will he ever...”

That was the singular line that he just couldn’t wrap his head around. There was never a moment where he would hesitate to drop everything he was doing to be there for you and make sure you were okay. 

Yes, he knew that you two were best friends and that it was natural. But what best friend drives across town at 2am because you had the stomach flu and your parents were out of town. Keep in mind it was his mom’s birthday that day. 

What best friend ditches their prom date when yours had stood you up. Or coax the drama teacher into giving you the lead in the school play because he saw the ways your eyes glimmered when you saw the words ‘High School Musical’. And damn, weren’t you justthe greatest Gabriella he’s ever seen.

Little did you know that in reality, he always wanted you to be the Gabriella to his Troy, and not Chad. Yet you seemed to have believed the latter all along. 

But in the end, what the hell kind of best friend remains oblivious to the fact that for years, past exes have consistently broken up with him for the same reason.

“Your heart belongs to someone else.”

Or alternatively,

“I’m not the right person for you.”

Straight A’s don’t mean shit when no teacher has ever taught him how to realize that he was irrevocably in love with his best friend, and that she had always, almost candidly, felt the same way.

He shuts his eyes tightly, hands aggressively running through his soaked hair as he comes to a conclusion. 

Being strangers could never be an option. Being friends, or moreso, best friends was fine. But that’s it. It was just fine. It was normalcy. It has been for years.

And that just wasn’t going to cut it for him anymore.

-

Your arm traces along the fabric of the bedsheets, alerting you that there was a void of space and lack of warmth from the other side of the bed. Your eyes spring open to see that there was no one laying beside you. 

A long yawn escapes your lips as you stretch your limbs, body sprawling all over the bed before selfishly tugging the sheets all to yourself. 

Soft hissing from which you assume was coming from his shower was confirmed to be true when your eyes spot the closed bathroom door and the small beam of light that was emitting from it. 

A small, folded piece of paper that was taking up the space of where his head was resting was where your eyes shift to next. 

y/n <3

You knit your brows together, knowing that it was most likely put there strategically rather than a piece of trash that had slipped out of his pocket.

It was addressed to you after all and so you grab it while making a futile attempt to rub the sleep out of your eyes. Your throbbing headache and churning insides had significantly died down. Regardless of your recovery time you internally make a promise to yourself to never get this wasted ever again. The chances of you sticking to it?  Highly debatable considering the current situation you’re in. 

Blinking rapidly, you finally are able to decipher whatever is written onto the paper. And it says:

hi y/n, i can already tell by the looks that you’re giving me that you already despise this game and im sorry. all i wanna say is that by the time you read this, i hope that we remain close as ever even though what i plan on saying tonight could obliterate all of that. i wanted to play this game bc i know we’re both hiding stuff from each other and it’s about time we get it out. at least for me. whatever happens, i love you. always will. 

- chim :)

EDIT: for fuck’s sake y/n i’m FUCKING IN LOVE WITH YOU TOO I WAS SUPPOSED TO CONFESS TO U FIRST LOSER NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND T-T

-

“Finally awake?” You hear a familiar voice call out. He walks out of the bathroom, fully clothed (to your dismay) while drying his hair with a towel, eyes immediately softening as they connect with yours. 

You swallow down your nerves, “Yeah, I’ve been.”

He walks over to the edge of the bed, eyes shifting to the piece of paper in your hand before reverting his focus back to your face, “What are you reading there?” 

“I don’t know,” you huff, feigning ignorance, “why don’t you tell me.”

A soft chortle leaves his lips as he throws the towel to the side, smiling as wide as ever as he jumps onto the vacant spot on his bed right next to you.

Propping himself up, he sits against the headboard, letting out a content sigh before looking down at you once more. “Come here.” He says, reaching his arms out in hopes that you’d fill the idle gap.

And you do, shaking the sheets off of your body as you place yourself in his arms, freshly revelling in the comfort. You wrap your arms snugly around his waist, letting your head rest on his chest while he clutches onto you tightly. 

“I’m sorry for pushing the subject so hard onto you last night.” He starts off with, “I guess I just never fathomed the fact that you could return the feeling, and I was too stubborn to even admit it to you in the first place.” He expresses while stroking your back,  “I didn’t mean to confront you so harshly, it’s unlike me, and I’m really sorry about it Y/N.”

“Do you think I’m mad about that Jimin?” You inquire, just barely above a whisper.

He pulls back slightly, peering down at you, “Are you?”

“Of course not. I should be the one apologizing anyways for being even more stubborn and resorting to such childish ways.” You disclose whilst mentally beating yourself up.

“Hey, there’s no use in beating ourselves up over it. Look where we are now.” 

“Where exactly are we Jimin?” You inquire timidly, head still resting on his chest. 

His fingers brush over the base of your chin, gently tilting your head up until your eyes found his. 

“Y/N, it’s honestly hard for me to formulate the words but all I know is that I think I’m in love with you. And I think I have been for a long time, no scratch that, I have been for a long time,” he says all in one breath, making you smile at how high-strung he was acting. 

The grin remains plastered onto your face, “I’m not drunk still right because did I just hear you say that you’ve been in love with me?”

“Y/N…” he whines, jutting out his bottom lip as he drags out the last syllable of your name.

You can’t help but laugh. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! Go on please.” 

He bites his lip, “I honestly had a whole speech prepared in the shower but I forgot all of it.”

“It’s alright, I barely remember half the stuff I spewed out last night,” you chortle.

He chuckles, “Well, if you were wondering, you’re cute as fuck when you’re piss drunk.”

The compliment makes your breath hitch in your throat—your heart starting to pick up speed dangerously quick.

A few seconds pass, allowing you to slightly gain back some of your composure, “Why did you um– I mean– when do you think you fell in love with me?” You stutter. 

“I was actually trying to figure that out too,” he starts, “in the shower. Well, this is going to sound dumb,” he admits, sharply exhaling out of his nose, “But do you remember when we went on a field trip to that amusement park in 8th grade? Around halloween time.”

“I think so… but what about it?”

He nods. “I still remember that night so vividly for some reason,” he pauses, collecting his thoughts, “There were haunted houses all over the park. And they were all different themes. And I think the first one we went into together was—”

“The clown one.” You deadpan. 

“Yeah!” He beams, laughing at the way you shudder after your words, “Anyways, you were walking behind me with your hands on my shoulders, but you had a razor grip and I thought my arms were going to fall off, so I made you walk next to me instead. We had our arms interlocked and you were gripping onto me so closely and you had your head buried in my shoulder the whole time.” He explains, the smile never ceasing to leave his lips.

You don’t take his eyes off of him—smiling sweetly as he explains the retrospective moment that you never knew had held so much significance to him.

“All of a sudden, you grabbed my hand, and honestly, I think that was the scariest part of the whole experience,” he admits, chuckling softly. 

“But then I intertwined fingers with you. And I liked it. Thinking about it now, I probably loved it. It felt almost borderline euphoric. Like as if I was riding a high, and when we detached hands, it felt like there was just something missing. And I guess I never really put the pieces together because it just became a normal thing after that. And when our skinship kept evolving from there, I just kept dismissing it over and over again. Like as if that feeling was a normal thing to happen between friends, because I genuinely thought it was. Yeah, I think that’s the moment I pretty much fell in love with you.” He finishes, giving you a close-mouthed smile while he tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear. 

Astounded was an understatement. You couldn’t believe that you both had been suppressing these feelings for so long. Yet somehow, this whole confession didn’t seem out of place or time, it was as if everything that had happened beforehand had led up to this very moment. 

“Wow, Jimin I– I don’t know what to say.” You reply.

He shakes his head. “You don’t have to say anything Y/N. I’m sorry for making you wait for so long, after all.”

You interject, “Please don’t say sorry, I think we were definitely both in the wrong here.”

He smiles, except this time his eyes crinkle up all the way, “Alright, but can you at least let me make it up to you?”

“I’m listening.” You jokingly reply.

“Let’s go on a date,” he declares brazenly, “but tonight, after we’ve recovered from our hangovers and what not.”

The corners of your lips upturn so high that your cheekbones sting, “Jimin, I’d love to–”

“Ah, wait! I’m not done.” He cuts you off, head inching forward, leaning in so close that you could feel his breath tickle your ear and the heat rushing up to your cheeks. 

“And at the very end of the night, I’ll make certain that you won’t be able to walk normally by tomorrow.” He whispers into your ear— voice low and full of lust.

Shivers run through your body as it feels like all the wind had just gotten knocked out of you. Yeah, this was definitely worth the wait.

-

-

-

MASTERLIST ; SEQUEL

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