#jimin ff

[bangtanficsforyou]

They Reject You (maknae line)-03

Pairing: maknae line x reader (fuckboi! Jimin x Reader, Co-worker Taehyung x Reader, Idol Jungkook x Reader)

Warnings: swear words here and there.

Word count: 20K (approx)

A/N: long long long asf! (There's author's note at the bottom too).

Park Jimin

Jimin may have been very determined while pledging that he will make things right but right now, he's utterly confused and clueless. 

How exactly does he make things right?

If he were to go by the way movies suggest, he should be sending you chocolates and bouquets of flowers. But the question is, will that do? Will that be enough? Can hurting someone emotionally be fixed by something material?

He doesn't know.

Oh, that's another thing. In recent days, Jimin's mind has been throwing questions at him which he has no answers to. Which, needless to mention, has been frustrating him to no end.

He feels like there's a lot he needs to figure out before taking any action. Because lord knows he doesn't want to mess up again and given his history he has a habit of doing exactly that over and over again. 

The question that has been bugging him the most is; why does he even want to fix things with you? 

It's a question Jimin wholeheartedly avoids thinking about. Because he doesn't have an answer and thinking about this particular question makes him feel a little too uncomfortable.

However, to him, the question also feels like a big empty blank that he needs to fill in order to make sense of what he should do next. Almost as if, if he figures out this one thing, he will have all his answers. 

Which again, doesn't make sense to him. How can figuring out one thing give answers to the rest? But again, he should begin somewhere. Which obviously isn't going to be answering the big question.

Hence he does what he has been doing for the past few days; searching for ways to apologise on YouTube.

It's quite obvious that his YouTube searches haven't been very successful. But in his defence, it isn't Jimin's fault. It's YouTube's.

Almost every video that YouTube suggests as a response to his search, has this implication that the girl being apologised to, is the lover of the person seeking forgiveness.  

Huh? 

But that's so not the case. You're not his lover.

At some point, Jimin got so frustrated that he went on a mini rant to Taehyung, about how this is the 21st century and how a boy and girl need not always have a romantic relationship. And it's while he's ranting via text that he is hit by the brilliant idea of inviting Taehyung over. After all, if there's someone who's better than Jimin when it comes to the ladies, it's Taehyung. 

Half an hour later, Jimin couldn't rush to the door any faster when the bell rang. 

Taehyung greets the troubled boy with a scoff of disbelief. "Never seen you this excited over my arrival, ever."

Jimin is the least bit interested in paying attention to his best friend's teasing. "You gotta help me. It's already been three days and I haven't been able to figure anything out."

"It's about making up to that girl, right?" On receiving a nod from Jimin, Taehyung continues, "What was her name again?"

"Y/N."

"Right, Y/N," Taehyung makes a note to himself, having a hunch it's a name he will hear quite often. "So where exactly are you stuck?" 

Jimin leads his friend to the couch so that Taehyung can have a look at the screen. "Just look at the results. There are literally thousands of responses but not one that's of use. What's the point of having internet if it can't help you when you need?!"

Taehyung snickers. "Yeah, you did go on a half an hour rant about it via text."

Jimin huffs at the way Taehyung seems to not share the same level of frustration as him. But alas, maybe him being in a light mood is a good thing after all. That way Taehyung can think optimally and come up with a solution and then Jimin can finally have a good night's sleep. 

Gosh when Jimin thinks about it, it sends shivers down his spine. He really needs to sleep. 

"Great! You know all about it, so now get on with it," Jimin speaks with a firm nod of determination and turns his body ninety degrees so that he is entirely facing Taehyung. 

And then just keeps staring. 

Taehyung stares back for a second or two and then bursts out laughing. He laughs so hard, that his ears miss the questions Jimin throws his way, querying about the cause of his laughter. He laughs so hard, that he has to place a pillow against his stomach because it has started hurting. He laughs so hard that it takes him a total of five minutes to stop. 

When he does stop laughing, he utters a sentence that sends Jimin into a similar laughter fit. 

"You're so in love."

Or maybe wait. 

Jimin doesn't laugh. 

Jimin blinks at Taehyung blankly and then scoffs in annoyance. Taehyung can't be serious. "I can't believe you're in the mood of making jokes when I'm so stressed."

"Oh, I can assure you, I'm not joking," Taehyung shakes his head with a chuckle, denying Jimin's words. "You're definitely in love."

Jimin pauses. He doesn't like how sure Taehyung seems to be of his words. It makes Jimin realise that Taehyung isn't joking. Taehyung really thinks Jimin is in love. 

Huh. 

"Don't you think I'd know if I was in love?" 

Taehyung snorts. "Clearly not."

Now Jimin's curious. "What makes you so sure of your words?"

"Hmm, let's think for a moment," Taehyung responds, pretending to think deeply for a moment. "You have been worried sick, haven't been behaving like yourself and are throwing tantrums like a five-year-old kid. All because a girl hasn't been talking to you–"

"That could simply mean she's a very good friend to me," Jimin counters even before Taehyung can finish his sentence. 

"Well, you don't kiss your friends while drunk." 

Jimin shuts up at that, not because he agrees with Taehyung's statement but because he needs a moment to figure out what to reply to that. He needs to think of something that is a justifiable reason for why he had kissed you in his drunken state of mind. 

Unfortunately, the best he comes up with is; "I didn't know what I was doing. I was drunk. Plus, me kissing someone shouldn't be news, drunk or not." 

Taehyung nods. "Right, that's your thing. Kissing and sleeping around."

For the first time in his life, Jimin feels an odd sensation in his chest at the mention of his player lifestyle. He can't place why (another thing he can't figure out, yes) but for the first time he wishes these words were not used to describe him. But admittedly, that's who he is. It's only normal to describe him by who he is. 

Jimin keeps quiet as a sign of letting Taehyung know that he can go on. 

"But surprisingly enough, since Y/N has stopped talking to you, you haven't fooled around with anyone," Taehyung squints his eyes, looking like a detective who's trying to solve a complicated riddle. "Wonder why that might be." 

Jimin misses the sarcastic tone completely because he's taken aback by his friend's words. It's only now that he realises that he indeed, has not fooled around with anyone in the last week or so. 

It's true that he has been going to parties and have been getting drunk and have been doing what he usually does. Except for one thing, it seems. Hooking up. 

Oddly enough, the thought of hooking up with someone didn't even occur to him. It's not like he restrained himself or something. It's like he forgot that aspect of his life, entirely. 

What the fuck.

Taehyung silently watches the realisation play out on Jimin's face. It's entertaining, to say the least. His sweet fuckboy of a friend is in love and has zero clue about it. How sweet. 

He only hopes Jimin comes to his senses while this denial is still sweet and not when it's all bitter and sour. But looking at the way Jimin is struggling, one thing is for sure and that is, he isn't going to get his 'happy realisation' just yet. 

"Your bulb will take time to light up," Taehyung interrupts Jimin's thoughts, "Let me just help you with the apologising thing."

---------------------------------------------------------------

Jimin has been standing in front of your door for five minutes now. With a huge flower bouquet at that. Because according to Taehyung:

"It's not what you give that matters, it's the thought you put into it. It could be flowers, it could be chocolates–yes I know, at the end of the day they are mere materials. But what's wrong with that?

You've gotta start somewhere. What's important is that you show her that you have realised your mistake, you're sorry and that you'd never do something like that ever again. Sending gifts is not all. It might not earn you her forgiveness but it shows that you're trying and that's something." 

Hence, despite not considering sending gifts as an option at first, here Jimin is, doing exactly that. But then it's not like he could come up with a better idea himself and he thinks Taehyung is right, he should at least start somewhere. 

But he wanted to make it as meaningful as he could. Which is why he did a little research and showed up here himself. He needs to do just one last thing, press the calling bell. 

He sighs and tells himself that there's no point in delaying it, the sooner he does it, the better. Plus, it only means that he will be able to see you after another three-day stretch. 

The thought of seeing you again, does it for him. He presses the bell and with a bated breath, waits for you to open the door. 

Thankfully, he doesn't have to wait long. You swing the door open and Jimin is relieved that your reaction on seeing him is that of surprise and not that of disdain. He would have run in the opposite direction and would have been too ashamed to face you had that been the case. 

Despite not running away, Jimin seems to have lost his capability to talk, for all he does is stare at your face. It gets to the point where you have to be the one to ask him what he's doing at your doorstep. 

Jimin looks away as soon as he snaps out of it and remembers what he's here for. He still doesn't speak and just pushes the bouquet in his hands towards you and urges you to take it. 

It's not like you hadn't noticed the bouquet, it's unmissable really. It's this big, gorgeous arrangement of pink roses and the lighting of the hallway falls on the flowers in a way that makes it look like a portrait. When Jimin tries handing over the bouquet to you, you're once again taken by surprise and out of instinct you take hold of the bouquet without a second thought. 

The moment Jimin knows that you have the bouquet, he takes a few steps back, bows to you and takes off. 

Well, guess he did run away, after all. 

You don't even get the time to question him as to why the sudden flowers as you stand there for a moment until you're sure that Jimin isn't coming back. With a confused sigh, you head back into your apartment. 

"I should put them in water," you mumble to yourself and rest the bouquet on your centre table. 

However, it's at this very moment that your eyes land on a piece of paper that seems to have been folded with great care and has been kept in such a way that it isn't visible from the front but only from the top. 

With a small frown of curiosity, you take the paper out with your fingers. On unfolding, you find a small printed note on the left side and a handwritten note on the right. 

The left side of the note read: "Pink roses signify gratitude, admiration and appreciation." 

The right side of the note read: "You're not the stupid one, I am."

There's a brief moment where you are clueless and you have to think as to what Jimin could possibly mean. However, it doesn't take long for you to figure it out as you're hit with the memory of letting Jimin know how he has made you feel for a very, very long time. 

One particular line sticks out and you have a hunch that his note refers to that.

"I felt so stupid to be hanging out with you when you couldn’t even pause and give me the minimum respect I deserve.”

Huh. 

Is...Is Jimin apologising? 

No way. 

After that day you had thought Jimin would either just stop talking to you or would just show up a few days later as if nothing ever happened. Never had you considered that he would choose to apologise. But apparently, that's exactly what he has decided on. 

Wow. This is way more surprising than the sun rising in the west. 

You do not doubt that he must have taken the help of some of his friends but that's only fair. You can imagine how hard it must be for someone like Jimin to apologise to someone. 

You shake your head in amusement and bring a vase filled with water to place the flowers in. 

Honestly, you hadn't thought much about Jimin since that day. The way you felt lighter after saying what you had wanted to for a long time, was incredibly freeing. You were also proud of yourself for finally standing up and for sticking to your decision to cut him off. It made you wish you had done it sooner. 

But now that Jimin is apologising, in his own way, you are a tad bit surprised that it doesn't throw you into a mental debate. That you don't have to battle yourself on what to do. 

Things are pretty clear in your head. 

You forgive Jimin. 

You had forgiven him long before he even sent you the flowers. With your bottled-up emotions out of the way, it gave you the clarity you needed to see things for how they were. 

You had always had a weak spot for Jimin. Jimin, not so much. You were just another girl to him. But the thing with having weak spots is that they make you vulnerable. 

But Jimin is Jimin. He has no clue about these kind of things. Does he? For you, to expect Jimin to understand the sensitivity of the matter, was basically setting yourself up for disappointment from the get-go. 

It's the same as looking for a mango in a banyan tree. It's fruitless. 

That does not mean, that you blame yourself. When emotions that are beyond your control, get involved, the practical mind is forced to take a back seat. Romantic affection is for sure one such feeling where one tends to lose their thinking and decision-making capabilities. 

You forgive Jimin. You also forgive yourself. 

Does that mean you'd be okay with being friends with Jimin, again? No, you cannot bring yourself to do that. 

The trust and faith you had put in him has been broken and that's enough of a reason for you to move on. 

So what is Jimin to you, now? 

Someone you still have a weak spot for because it's not like you wake up one day and suddenly all your feelings you harboured for a person disappears. But you know you want to move on. You know you do not wish to go back to sharing the same dynamic with Jimin ever again. 

And this time your decision does not come from a place of hurt, anger or frustration. This time it comes from a place of clarity and acceptance, which is also why it doesn't seem difficult to follow through with your choice. 

Nevertheless, you do appreciate Jimin giving you flowers. Although, you think there was no need for it. 

For a brief moment, you contemplate if you should be texting a thank you to him but then decide otherwise when you remember that you have blocked him. Even if it's for the short span of two minutes to send a text, you don't think you're ready to unblock him just yet. 

For the time being you simply settle for putting the vase at the top of one of your drawers and taking good care of them. 

----------------------------------------------------------------

The next day it was a bouquet of white flowers with a note that read: 

I'm sorry; on the left and I know flowers won't earn me your forgiveness but I'm trying; on the right.

It once again was Jimin at your doorstep and once again, before you could say anything, he had decided his job was done as soon as the flowers were in your hands. 

You were too flabbergasted as you had thought that the whole giving you flowers thing was only a one-time thing. You didn't think Jimin would show up for a second time, just the day after, to give you another massive bouquet. 

Maybe you should have seen the same thing happening on the third day but somehow you didn't and were just as surprised, if not more, when Jimin showed up with another bouquet on the third day. 

Before you could say anything, Jimin was gone. 

Which is exactly why you now find yourself unblocking his contact. 

You: hey

You: just letting you know I appreciate the flowers but you do not need to send them anymore 

You: I forgive you

Jimin is on the phone with Taehyung getting an earful about his cowardness and running, when he receives your text.

"I'm telling you, this flower thing is not going to work. She hasn't even tried to talk to me" 

"From what I have heard you are the one who has never allowed her to even open her mouth and–"

"Hold on, someone texted me," Jimin interrupts Taehyung solely to avoid getting called out for the umpteenth time. However, his eyes almost fall out of his sockets when he sees that it's you. "Tae, Y/N texted me!"

Taehyung, too, is surprised to hear this. "What did she say?"

Jimin takes a deep breath, his nostrils flaring as he fills his lungs up with as much air as possible. "Right, I will open her messages." 

When he does read the words you have sent him, he is even more surprised. But even more so, he is relieved. Gosh, he feels like he could cry tears of joy. 

"She forgave me," Jimin speaks in a tone that is a little too loud for Taehyung's ears. 

However, Taehyung doesn't protest as his friend's words seem more important at the moment. "Are you serious? She did? What did she say?"

"She said that she appreciates the flowers and that I need not send them to her anymore and that she forgives me." 

Taehyung pauses for a moment and then grins brightly, the relieved and excited tone of his friend making him feel happy. "Then what are you doing fucker? Text her back, you idiot."

Jimin nods but then responds verbally when he remembers that Taehyung is over the phone and not with him in his room. "I'll text her back."

Saying so, he ends the call with Taehyung and starts typing. 

Jimin: Thank you

Wait. 

Thank you?

Should he say thank you? Is that the right response? But is sending a simple thank you good enough? 

He doesn't think so. 

Quickly deleting the typed words, he begins to think of a better response. 

If not thank you, then what? How about 'How have you been?' No, no, no. That sounds way too casual. 

He should send something that appears to be cool and that doesn't make things awkward. At the same time, he should text something that leaves room for a conversation. A proper one. 

Geez, texting is difficult. 

What if he tries teasing you like he did before everything happened? No, that would make it look like he never took the matter seriously. 

Should he...should he just be uncool and be honest for once? 

Should he just let you know that he feels like a bag of stones has been lifted off his chest and that he can breathe again? That he feels like he can think properly, again? 

That might be too much. 

But maybe he can just try letting you know that he's incredibly grateful for your forgiveness without sounding cheesy? Yeah, he can definitely do that. 

Jimin: Thank you.

Jimin: that word isn't enough but that's the best I have got 

Jimin: I am incredibly grateful and I promise I won't make you regret your choice. 

When you read his texts a few minutes later, you're rather surprised. Is Jimin saying these things? There's no way. 

But then you come to a conclusion that, there indeed is no way. Jimin must have made a friend of his type out these words. Now, that makes a whole lot of sense. 

You chuckle at the thought and react to his messages with a thumbs up and leave it at that. 

The moment Jimin sees you reacting to his messages, he types out another message, one that he has delicately crafted in his mind. Something light that hopefully will lead to a proper conversation.

Jimin: How have you been? 

Your phone pings and you notice Jimin's text. Something uncomfortable churns in your stomach at his words. Jimin most likely thinks things are back to normal and that you two will once again bicker and joke around in no time.

Guess, you need to break it to him. 

You: I've been fine 

You: but I would rather have us not go back to the way we were 

Jimin is already in the middle of forming another text that conveys that things won't be the same and that he'd do better but his heart literally breaks into pieces when he reads the next text. 

You: I don't think we should be in contact anymore 

You: it's a proven fact it doesn't do either of us any good 😂

You: especially me.

—--------------------------------------------------------

Jimin has decided to watch a movie. Not just any movie, the fault in our stars. Because he needs something to make him feel sad. Correction; he needs something that he is consciously aware of, to make him feel sad. 

It's much much more annoying when you get sad and heartbroken over something and yet you cannot explain why you feel that way. Imagine suddenly getting stabbed by invisible knives that you can't see but can only feel. Yeah, it feels the same. 

But who cares anyway? Jimin is watching a movie that will make him plenty sad and unlike you, it won't have him feeling like someone who hasn't been in touch with his emotions for ages. 

Taehyung munches on his popcorn slowly, his focus periodically shifting between Jimin and the TV screen. 

Taehyung knew something was up the moment Jimin texted him asking if he would like to watch The Fault in Our Stars. For the people who don't know, Jimin does not watch sad movies, like ever. Because irrespective of how much of a fuckboy he is, he is a huge softie on the inside (which is actually very cliche of him). But as his fuckboy-ness would have it, he absolutely hates crying. 

Taehyung does not believe that Jimin does not cry or that he tries to keep his tears at bay. Because from the few times that he has seen his friend crying, he knows that he isn't someone who's good at holding his tears back. So no, Jimin does cry and when he does, he cries like a baby. However, what Jimin ensures is that he does not cry in front of anyone.

But here's Jimin, crying in front of Taehyung. 

This boy is going to give me a headache, Taehyung thinks with a deep inhale as he once again shifts his focus from Jimin to the screen.

It must have been another fifteen minutes or so when he hears a small sniffle coming from his left. Huh, things haven't even turned that sad in the movie yet. 

Taehyung looks at his friend only to realise his suspicions are right when he notices his friend subtly wiping under his eyes. 

Taehyung takes hold of the remote and switches the TV off. 

He has had enough. 

Jimin looks at Taehyung with perplexed features but before he can ask a question, Taehyung is getting up from his seat to turn the lights on. 

This makes Jimin quickly grab a few tissues and wipe at the corner of his eyes. 

Taehyung rolls his eyes in annoyance. "Sometimes I can't tell if you're a drama queen or a little kid." 

Jimin looks at Taehyung with a clueless expression. As long as he pretends he has no clue what Taehyung is talking about, it should be good. 

Taehyung simply scoffs and shakes his head in defeat. "Do you want to talk about it or should I just leave?" 

This has Jimin facing away from Taehyung and he scowls at the centre table. "I have nothing to talk about."

"Cool then, I have some important work to do, I'll get going." 

"Sure do that. Leave me. Everyone does, why shouldn't you?"

Ah. Drama queen, it is. 

"So what Y/N left? Like did she leave you on seen or something? Is that why you're so sad and upset?" Taehyung guesses the possible cause of Jimin's state from his words. 

Jimin wishes it was that simple. He honestly would give anything for Taehyung's words to be right, for that being the cause of his sadness. But if only.

Taehyung deduces that things might not be that simple when Jimin does not give a verbal answer and appears to become more sulky. 

Taehyung makes his way to the couch and claims his previous seat next to Jimin. "What will you take to just tell me what went wrong? I know you're dying to let it out."

Jimin looks at his friend for a moment then suddenly reaches out to grab his phone from the table. He opens your texts and just places his phone in Taehyung's hands. 

With a small concentrated frown, he takes a look at the screen and goes through the chats. 

"So this is what has gotten you like this," he mumbles to himself.  "Have you tried talking to her and telling her that you won't be repeating the same things again?" 

Jimin shakes his head. "She never gave me the chance to do so."

Taehyung hums, deep in thought. "What do you want to do now?" 

"I don't think it matters."

"It does. Now tell me what do you want?"

Jimin looks up at the ceiling with blurry eyes. "I think I want us to go back to the way we were."

Taehyung, although wanting to, does not show the disbelief he feels at Jimin's words. He keeps his composure calm so that Jimin does not feel uncomfortable. "What you're saying is you want to go back to the way you would annoy her and she would put up with it?"

Jimin's spirit lifts just a little bit when he remembers how things were before and he finds himself absentmindedly nodding. 

"Which would also mean going back to the way you would keep sleeping around with people and then at the same time would make flirty comments towards Y/N?" 

The tiny little corner of his mouth that had lifted, once again turns into a scowl as Taehyung's words register in his brain. It's as if he's knocked into his senses. 

Noticing that Taehyung has successfully managed to grab Jimin's attention, he hopes he can only make Jimin see his point. "Honestly, Jimin have you ever realised where you went wrong? Or did you apologise to her solely because you thought that was what she wanted and that would have her back in your life?" 

Questions. Another set of questions. Jimin could honestly scream. But something about Taehyung's gaze makes him unable to run away from the queries like he has been doing all this time.

He considers Taehyung's words for a moment and then mumbles in a small voice, "I don't know."

Taehyung hums, having guessed that answer. 

"I just wanted to apologise to her because I know I have hurt her," Jimin keeps his tone soft and vulnerable. "I may not know all the ways in which I have hurt her but I know I should have respected her wishes and should have stopped flirting with her when she had asked."

"I may not know exactly how or why it affected her but I know it led her to be angry–" Jimin breaks off suddenly when a thought occurs to him and soon he looks even more ashamed, "–and they say all anger stems from hidden pain. If that's true then I must have caused her pain."

Taehyung releases a breath he didn't know he was holding. He wonders how his friend can be both stupid and smart at the same time and why exactly does his brain start working when the damage has already been done. 

"So you realise that you have caused her some sort of pain?" 

"I must have," Jimin agrees. 

"Have you then tried figuring out what exactly she means to you?" 

Jimin's tears have dried, thanks to the ongoing conversation that has distracted him enough to have the wheels of his brain running again.  

"She's someone I care about a lot and someone I want in my life." 

"As a friend?" Taehyung pushes. 

Jimin nods. 

Taehyung hums, "I think you really need to sit with yourself and think things through." 

—-------------------------------------------------------

Jimin is dumb and Taehyung is loyal.

Which is why the latter finds himself in the middle of a party, waiting for you to arrive. 

A week of Jimin moping and being a sullen child, had Taehyung take matters into his own hands. Jimin could not possibly figure things out by himself even if everyone around him could. Taehyung only hopes he will admit what has been brewing for a long time, when his feelings smack him right across the face. 

Taehyung leans against the bar counter, his eyes hardly moving from the entrance as he waits for you to walk through the door. 

It takes about another fifteen minutes of his eyes locked on the door, for you to finally emerge. 

Taehyung relaxes a breath. He had to do a lot of digging to find a common friend and for him to convince that common friend to somehow convince you to come to the party. He wasn't sure if all of this would work, but now that you're here, success is a step closer. 

He gives you five minutes to say your hi's and hello's and then, he's making his way to you. 

"And you must be Y/N?" 

You look at the guy who seems to know you by your name and frown when you don't recall ever having interacted with him. "And you must be?"

"Taehyung. Kim Taehyung."

Your brain clicks in realisation. Taehyung, a name you have heard Jimin mention many times. However, this is the first time that you get to put a face to the said name. 

"I have heard of you," you nod as a feeling of reluctance takes over you. Why is Taehyung approaching you? 

He smiles. "I'm not surprised by that."

You return his smile awkwardly and wonder what you should be saying next. "How do you know me?" 

"Let's just say I have heard of you as well," his smile turns into a full-blown grin as if he's enjoying this. 

"From Jimin?" 

"Ah yes. We both have an idiot named Jimin in our lives."

You feel your traitor heart get curious at the confirmation. Taehyung knows of you from Jimin? Jimin talked about you to his friends? The thought of that catches you with surprise as you never thought you were ever important enough to him, for him to do that. You thought you were just another girl who fell for him. However, your curiosity is soon overtaken by the thought of him making light and fun of your feelings.

"That idiot, however, speaks highly of you, which is why I just could not miss the opportunity to speak to you," Taehyung quips, sensing the thoughts inside your head. 

You look at Taehyung, wondering what to make of his words. You just find it difficult to believe that Jimin speaks highly of you. One speaks highly of the people they respect and well—no, you don't want your mind to wander there.

"So you're here speaking to me, to verify the things Jimin has said about me?" You keep your tone light, playful and teasing, so as to not come off as rude. While, on the inside, you're really confused as fuck as to what to make out of this. Does Taehyung not know of the recent changes in the dynamics between you and Jimin? 

"Oh no, absolutely not," he shakes his head. "I do not doubt a thing Jimin has said about you. I'm only here out of sheer curiosity and with the intent to get to know you better."

And some ulterior purposes. That part he leaves unspoken. 

You observe him for a moment and relax a little when you realise that he seems genuine. You don't know, why he's here and what he wants from you, but you decide talking to him won't be of any harm.

—---------------------------------------------------------

Jimin is grumpy as fuck when he walks in and is greeted by the loud music that blasts through the speakers. Goodness, why did he enjoy partying, again? 

He really wouldn't be here had it not been for Taehyung's constant nagging that he had something important to say, and that couldn't be done unless he attended the party. 

Technically, his words made zero sense. Taehyung couldn't just say whatever important thing he had to say, over the phone? Apparently, according to him, he couldn't. 

He prays to whatever god is out there, for the sake of Taehyung that he finds him soon. 

The universe, however, has other plans. 

Jimjn spots you before he spots Taehyung. He sees you smiling wide and even in the dimmed lights, he can see the way your eyes shine with amusement and joy. As selfish as it is, Jimin feels any amount of hope he might have had, leave at the sight. You're clearly doing fine without him. A part of him wishes you weren't. 

It feels eerily similar to the time when he had spotted you on his way to class. 

But then he realises you are with a guy. A strange emotion fills him, one that he believes he hasn't felt before, ever. He realises he's jealous. He's so jealous of the lucky bastard who's getting to make you laugh and with whom you seem so comfortable with. With that jealousy, comes a huge wave of insecurity. The guy doesn't seem to have messed up like Jimin did. He doesn't seem to be someone you feel the need to cut off your life. All of which Jimin has done and is. 

However, when the light falls on the face of the said guy, Jimin is hit with a sense of anger and confirmation that the said guy is much, much better than Jimin is. 

Taehyung is smart, has a good sense of humour and surely knows more when it comes to matters of the heart. Whereas, Jimin has only been confused and no matter how hard he has tried, he has been unsuccessful in clearing up the cloud of confusion. 

For a brief moment, he is taken back to the words Taehyung had said to him–you're so in love–which Jimin had found utterly ridiculous at the time. However, now that he finds himself in the hold of jealousy and a brewing insecurity that only you hold the power to put a stop to, he doesn't find the idea as absurd. 

He's never been in love before. But somehow he is still hit with the realisation that all his desperation, anger, jealousy and insecurities stem from one thing and one thing only. His love for you. 

He is hit with more and more clarity with each passing moment as he stares at you. An overwhelming urge to make you his, washes over him and with strong, determined steps, he walks in the direction where you chat with Taehyung. 

The moment the two of you realise Jimin's presence, your smile falters whereas Taehyung's widens.

"Jimin," you whisper, caught completely off guard. 

"Y/N," he greets you back. "I wasn't expecting to see you here."

"Me neither," you mumble in a small voice. 

"How have you been?" 

Neither of you miss the fact that this was the very same question he had asked via text, to which you had made it clear that things would never be the same, instead of actually answering him. 

However, now that you both stand in front of each other, you think it would be incredibly rude to not answer him. "I'm fine." 

Your short answer leaves no further room for conversation and it's only when you realise that Jimin refuses to avert his eyes from you, that you ask him back the same question. 

"I've been anything but fine," Jimin answers, without missing a beat. 

His answer is similar to yours in terms of being short and vague. However, his response means exactly the opposite of yours. 

You stifle the question that's on the tip of your tongue and push away the overgrowing concern at his answer. This is exactly why you had chosen to end whatever friendship you two had over text. You were unsure of the feelings Jimin would stir within you. Sure, you have made the choice of moving on from him but there was no denying that you haven't moved on yet. 

You nod and think it would be best to include Taehyung in the conversation. He would surely know how to break the tension. However, you realise at the same time as Jimin does that Taehyung has disappeared into thin air. 

Taehyung's gone, you think with surprise and disbelief, having no clue when he left. 

Taehyung's gone, Jimin thinks, beaming with glee and satisfaction. 

"Do you want a drink?" Jimin asks, having no intention of leaving. 

"I could actually do with some alcohol," you mumble mainly to yourself, but somehow despite the loud music, Jimin manages to hear you. The very next moment he has two drinks in his hands and gracefully offers you one.

"I have a few things to say," he says after a few sips.

Oh god. Please be kind to my heart. You stay quiet. You were not prepared to face Jimin. After texting him that day, you had honestly thought that was it. It was hard for you to send him those words. So incredibly hard. But you knew it was for the best.  

A part of you had wished for Jimin to regret losing you. But you knew that thought to be impractical. You knew in reality, Jimin must have slipped into someone's bed instead of giving you a second thought. You had honestly thought Jimin's attempt at apologising with flowers was merely a result of his hurt to the ego. Nevertheless, you appreciate his effort and know better than to have any further expectations from the man. 

However, this is incredibly confusing. More so, because the Jimin who was sending you those flowers would run away right after he knew that the flowers had reached their destination. However, this Jimin, stands in front of you with eyes locked with yours, refusing to back down. 

"I had sent those flowers to you, because I knew I had to apologise. I knew I messed up. I knew I hurt you. Don't get me wrong, the knowledge that I had hurt you was enough of a slap on my face, but I didn't know what it felt like for you," he takes a pause, "but now I do."

Jimin is aware that comparing what he has put you through with what he felt for merely a few minutes after seeing you with Taehyung, is completely unfair. However, it'd be fair to say he has got a taste of his own medicine and he fucking hates himself to have you put through that, over and over again. 

"I know now, because–," he takes a deep breath, afraid you won't believe him, "–I have come to the realisation that I'm in love with you."

Your pupils dilate in shock and after a brief moment, your expressions morph into that of disbelief, much like Jimin had expected. 

"I don't expect you to believe it. I know I haven't done much to earn your trust. All I ask is for you to give me a chance to prove myself."

You're too shocked to make coherent thoughts. As a matter of fact, the severity of Jimin's words doesn't click in your brain. How can it, when you have seen it for yourself how appalled Jimin feels at the thought of commitment? How can you digest the thought of Jimin saying these words, that too, to you? 

"What do you want, Jimin?" You ask wanting the interaction to be cut short, afraid that the longer you stay in his presence the more you will find yourself inclined to believe his words. 

"Let me take you out on a date." 

Kim Taehyung

I'm in a relationship.

You absent-mindedly stare at the words on your screen as you feel the mix of emotions resurface yet again. 

Taehyung is in a relationship. The Taehyung you love so dearly, is in a relationship. And if you are to go with his status updates, he's quite happy about it as well. 

How do you feel about it, exactly? 

You feel betrayed, hurt, confused, angry, perplexed, sad, annoyed, embarrassed, lonely, frustrated, upset. These emotions are only a few to name. There's so much you think and believe, you still haven't figured out yet. Anytime, you try to focus on your emotions in hopes that you will be able to let it all out, all you come up with is an empty feeling. 

That's another thing. You haven't cried at all. But you want to. You want to just let all of it hit you at once and get it off your chest. Because the heavy uncomfortable feeling that often stirs your heart is not something you wish to deal with for long. 

Sometimes your mind comes up with all the little things and moments that had made Taehyung so special to you and you find yourself this close to breaking into uncontrollable sobs. But then it just never happens. It's like someone is pressing the accelerator and the brake at the same time and you're just there, frozen in time, not knowing what to do. 

You doubt if you have even fully grasped the concept of Taehyung being in a relationship. The thought that he's in one and you got to learn about it only after he committed, that too through a WhatsApp status, is completely unbelievable to you for some reason. No matter how much you try, a part of you doesn't want to believe it.

It's a whole set of emotions you never thought Taehyung would make you feel. He was your feel-good person, one of your best friends and someone you trusted with your entire heart. It's something you don't even know as to how to react to. 

"Y/N!"

You blink back to reality when someone shakes you by your shoulders. "Huh?" 

"You zoned out again."

"Oh," you speak in a tone of realisation, "I'm sorry–"

"Nothing to apologise for. Just forget whoever that guy is. He's surely not treating you right if you have this conflicted look on your face all the time."

If only it were that easy. You wish it was that easy. 

You chuckle at your next desk co-worker, Shanaya's, words. "I will surely contemplate on your words." 

"Men don't deserve shit from us if they treat us like shit," she nods seriously. "And with the way, you have had this sad-confused look in your eyes for a whole week now, I strongly doubt that man is any good for you."

Oh yeah, it's been a week.

Although, you could have been fooled by how the admittance of his relationship remains the last text exchanged between the two of you. You just didn't know how to respond to him at that time. You were too busy absorbing the shock to think of a proper response. 

You had just shut your net off and tried your hardest to fall asleep. But you just couldn't get a blink of sleep and since then you also couldn't bring yourself to pretend to be fine with him, when you were far from it.

Maybe you had posted your status a little too frequently to subtly let him know that you're online and well-active on your socials but are simply choosing to not talk to him. On the other side of the coin, is the fact that you feel disheartened that he hasn't made any effort to talk to you. It's the longest the both of you have gone without talking to each other. 

A hand waves in front of your face gaining your attention as your co-worker looks at you knowingly. 

"See! Not good for you."

You smile at her words and shake your head softly, amused by her straightforward and direct nature. 

—-----------

"How are you?"

You roll your eyes before replying. "I'm fine, I'm fine."

"Hmm," your best friend hums. "On a scale of 1 to 10?"

"Idk man, 7?"

"That's an improvement," she speaks to herself. "Now tell me, have you blocked Taehyung, yet?"

"I won't do that," you reply softly with a tone of surety. 

She sighs over the phone. "Babe, he's a dick. Why haven't you cut him off yet, is beyond me."

Your best friend is of the kind whom if you call crying, she'd ask you to first get rid of the person who's responsible for your tears and then she will allow you to tell her what went down for you to cry. If only she were in the same city as you, she'd have committed the crimes herself instead of having to beg you to do them. 

She's protective of you, incredibly so. 

When you had told her everything about Taehyung, she had muttered to herself something along the lines of how she knew he was gonna turn out to be a dickhead. You never queried her on that because in a way you knew what she meant. 

On learning about the situation you and Taehyung were in and about his unwillingness to be in a relationship, she was very firm about making her point that Taehyung was only making excuses. She was adamant that a person who really loves you wouldn't come up with reasons as to why they shouldn't be together. At the time, you had acknowledged what she was trying to say but you added that sometimes people get scared and fear often turns out to be an emotion that is rather difficult to overcome.

With much reassurance from your side that Taehyung was a great guy, she had let go of the topic. However, to say that Taehyung has now earned the entirety of your best friend's hatred, would be an understatement. You'd have been really concerned about his safety had she been in the city. 

"He–", you pause briefly, "–isn't a bad guy." 

Your friend scoffs. "Right. He's the worst."

"He is nice," you say a little more firmly. 

"Oh! Yes please, someone please give him a Nobel prize for his niceness!"

To your surprise the tone in which she speaks, makes you burst out laughing. "You really hate him, don't you?"

"Has he ever given me a reason to NOT despise him?" 

You chuckle as your laughter dies off. "Well, I don't blame you. I'd hate the guy as well if I was in your place."

"Hah! So you agree on something with me."

"But," you emphasise on the word, "he's not a bad guy. I don't know how everything turned out to be this way but trust me he has a very tender heart."

"I cannot believe you're making excuses for him, Y/N." 

Her surprisingly soft tone serves as a reminder that your best friend is probably one of the most compassionate and understanding people you've ever met. The only time you've seen her behave like an angry child who's ready to throw some punches, is when you get hurt. 

And admittedly, you're the same way when it comes to her.

"I'm not making excuses for him, I know him. He'd never intentionally hurt someone."

"But he did hurt you!!!"

"I know and I doubt he realises it," you sigh. "But I need to know his side of things."

"I'm sure he will run if you try to confront him," she grumbles. "He'll probably not even reply if you tell him how much of a dick he's been."

"Heyyy," a childish whine escapes your lips. "I have more faith in him than that. He respects me enough to talk things out."

She makes a sound of complete disbelief, "You bet my ass he would just pull stuff out of his ass."

"We will see," you chuckle.

You had to make up your mind sooner or later and somehow the conversation with your best friend has reminded you of the faith you have in Taehyung. If you need answers, you're sure he'd give them. Most importantly, you don't plan on losing the friendship you have with him this easily. But you don't think you'd be able to just push everything aside and pretend that things are fine. You need to clear it out. You need for him to realise that he has hurt you and you need to know how things changed so quickly. 

—————————————————————

You: hey 

It took you another day to get the simple three-letter word out of your system. But you do it the very first thing in the morning after waking up. Whatever roller coaster ride of emotion it is going to take you on, you want it over by today. 

Thankfully, it takes only ten minutes for your phone to ping to notify you of a message from Taehyung. 

Tae 🐻: hello, birdie 👋

A snort escapes you when you imagine all the lovely cuss words that would leave your best friend's mouth if she were to learn of his response to your 'hey'.  

You, too, find yourself being amused yet disappointed at how oblivious he seems to be. 

You: I'm sorry for not responding to your texts any sooner

Chewing on your lower lip, you click on the send button. While this text is meant to serve as an apology, it also serves as a means for you to know whether he really is as clueless as he seems. You're curious if he's at least aware that something must have been wrong for you to not text for this long.

Tae 🐻: It's okay, don't worry. I understand!

Tae 🐻: work can get busy 

Tae 🐻: it's fine! 

Sighing, you realise it's fruitless. You need to be upfront as there's no other way for you to go about it. 

You: uhmm thanks 

You: but before we catch up and all that, can I just get a few things off my chest?

Tae 🐻: sure! Go ahead. 

Suddenly you find yourself feeling anxious. You are not quite sure how this is going to turn out and how you're going to put your emotions into words. It sure appears to be a difficult job considering how muddled your brain feels every time you think about the events that have led to this.

You:  i don't really know how to say what i want to say lol

You: this is so awkward

Tae 🐻: just say it

Tae 🐻: it's the same ol' me after all

Some of your anxiety softens at his words. 

You: i know but i just dk how to say it 😂

Tae 🐻: that's okay

Tae 🐻: would it be more comfortable for you if I were to go offline? and I can check your messages when you give me the green signal to open your texts? 

Now that he mentions it, you think that would be lovely. That way you could take your time figuring out how to word your sentences without having the rush of typing things out fast over the worry of him coming to assumptions before you say the full thing. 

You: that'd be great! 

You: thank you! 

Tae 🐻: well then, I'll go offline. You speak your heart out 😌

You: open my texts only when you see a thumbs up or a message that directly asks you to open it. Okay?

Tae 🐻: done 👍

Sighing, you relax on your sofa and think. Now that he's offline, you need to figure out what to say. Rather, where to start because you just have so much to say. 

It takes you another two or three minutes before you start typing. 

You: so idk how this is gonna sound or how it's gonna get interpreted but I really need this out of my chest for it's been bothering me the last few days. 

You: so ummm, you know we both had openly admitted to having feelings for each other and then you told me you weren't really ready for a relationship? And I agreed to things being the way they were because I never wanted to pressurise you. I always wanted to be a friend first, whom you can trust and feel safe with, more than anything else. 

You: it's true that we never had a name for what we were. But it's because of that very reason that it always remained very confusing to me as to where we stood. Especially where you stood. 

You: i always could have asked in the course of the year as to where we stood but i always let you be because i was cautious that asking you, would in a way, pressurise you. 

You: however, that is not to say that i wasn't put in a dilemma when i would get propositions for going out on dates or when someone would ask me out. 

You: i didn't know where your feelings for me lied. While I avoided any assumptions, i also didn't act as if you did not have feelings for me. Because what if you did and then my actions hurt you? I knew how much you have been hurt in the past and i just didn't want to add to that. 

Your fingers pause as you take a look at what you have covered so far. When you go through your last two texts, you go awry at the thought of sounding like someone who's claiming to have done him some huge favour. 

You: I'm not saying all this to say that i have done you a huge favour or something by the way. Or that you owe me something in return. 

You: I'm just saying this because when you're so cautious and thoughtful over someone, it hurts to be on the receiving end of actions that make you feel incredibly stupid. 

You: it would have been better if you had told me, you know? That "hey, there's this girl i like," and I'm not saying in a way that you had to take my permission or something but just that it would have been nice to know that you thought of me and of what kind of an effect it would have on me. 

You: I just wish I didn't have to learn from a WhatsApp status 

You pause before thinking if you have missed anything. When you go through your words, you realise that you indeed have missed something important. 

You see, in the mix of all the heavy emotions, you also are happy. You're happy for him. That's something you realised the very day you learned about his relationship. It's odd but even in the midst of all the confusion you were feeling, a part of you felt glad.

You were glad that he found someone he loves and someone who makes him happy. You also found yourself excited on his behalf. 

You won't lie, you were surprised that you weren't jealous. Before Taehyung, for a long time, you had hardly had any guy in your life except for fleeting crushes. Even then, you can acknowledge the fact that jealousy is a very natural emotion to feel in this scenario. However, when you realised that you were happy for him and that happiness did not originate from a place where you had to force it, you were also proud. 

To you, there's no greater testimony of your love than that. 

You: i don't think i have mentioned this before but I'm really happy and excited for you.

You: go ahead and open your texts ig 😂

There are questions in your mind that you think would have been better had you asked them. Questions as to how he was unwilling to be in a relationship when it came to you but suddenly found himself being in a relationship a year later? 

However, you decide that's something you'd rather not ask. 

When you think of it, you indeed find it unfair and there's perhaps that hint of anger that bubbles in your stomach. But you recognise that there's no purpose in asking that question. 

It's possible that his feelings for her run deeper than they ever did for you. Or it could be the fact that they work together and it's human that you'd grow close to someone who's there with you physically rather than someone whom you only talk to over the phone or via texts. 

But figuring out the why is none of your business. Neither is it something you're concerned with. Whatever the reason might be, he's in a relationship and he has already made a choice. The why is irrelevant now. 

Another reason, the why is irrelevant to you is because, you have never found yourself thinking along the lines of what you could have done differently for him to stay and choose you. You have never wondered if it was something you lacked. You'd never let yourself think that way for anyone. Once upon a time, you did. You were filled with insecurities and would question yourself anytime someone would hurt you or leave you. But you have overcome that and have learnt to love yourself. You'd never undo all that progress by entertaining those thoughts ever again. Even if it's Taehyung. 

Three little dots appear at the bottom of the screen letting you know Taehyung is typing. His text soon arrives making your breath hitch. 

Tae 🐻: I have read your texts. Give me some time, and I'll reply to them. 

So you'll have to wait. 

It's fair you think, he can take the time he needs, to figure out what he has to say. 

You only hope you can get over this soon. 

—--------------------------------------------------------

It's been an entire day since Taehyung said he'd reply to your texts but unfortunately, he hasn't yet. 

You know he will reply, you have that faith in him but you only wish he'd do it sooner. There's that lingering anxiety that comes with being unable to predict what he's going to say. 

You have also been wondering if you have worded your words correctly. You found yourself worrying what if you came across as jealous and as someone who's unhappy for him? You really hope you didn't sound bitter because you aren't. 

Yes, there's a part of you that is sad because the moments that you thought were special for the both of you, were all in your head. Because you loved him.

There's also this feeling that now you have been replaced. That now, things won't ever be the same. Perhaps, a part of you wishes you could stay in your head a little longer and pretend. 

But all of that aside, you also have immense amounts of trust in the friendship you both share. Taehyung is someone who is incredibly kind and loving, and he's a great friend in general and you're sure that both of you would somehow manage to keep your friendship intact.

Penny: Has he replied yet? 

You look down at the screen to find a text from your best friend.

You: no 

You: not yet 

Penny: huh told you

Penny: he's a dick 

You smile and shake your head.

Knowing you have a long day ahead, you cook yourself a plate full of breakfast and get ready for work. In a way, you're glad that there's work to keep you busy. You do not know what you'd have done had it been a Sunday. You'd probably have been restless as fuck and would have been checking your phone every five minutes.

Thanks to your workload, you only get time to check your phone during lunch. However, the workload doesn't help with the disappointment you feel, when each time that you do check your phone and find that there's no new message from Taehyung. The disappointment only increases when you realise he has put a status about some funny fact regarding hyenas. 

Whatever he sends you as a response to your texts, it better be good to have you kept waiting this long. 

—--------------------------------------------------------

It's nine in the evening and you're at home when you finally receive Taehyung's text. Your anxiousness is overpowered by curiosity and impatience as you click on his message. It's a wordy and lengthy one. 

Tae 🐻: I was confused, Y/N. Very confused. Although I had confessed my feelings to you, I was extremely confused and scared to take a step forward. When things with Kira ended, I was lonely and sad and my thoughts were very self-destructive. I had zero self-confidence. Talking to you, spending time with you, and texting you gave me the greatest joy and it acted as an escape from those thoughts, feelings and difficulties I was facing at the time. However, if you ask me now, where my feelings originated from, I wouldn't be able to tell. Were they genuine or a result of my love-starved state, I wouldn't be able to tell. But I'm glad it did as it helped me move on from the grief that accompanied my breakup. You have no idea how much you helped me at the time and I was selfish enough to take all of it, without thinking of the consequences, one of which was falling for you. This conversation we are having now is one which we should have had long ago. But I was scared that me not taking the step forward and telling you all this, would make you lose interest in me. Instead, I kept you hanging. I thank you for always being such an amazing friend. I have always loved you but I was too scared to put the tag of a relationship. I mistook my infatuation as readiness for being in a relationship. I'm guilty of all the things you mentioned but I don't know what to do to make things right, as I really don't want to lose the friendship we have. With all that I have done, you'd obviously think that I don't care about you, or at least not as much as you do, but trust me, I do. I have just been shit at expressing my gratitude and telling you how much you mean to me. I'll do better. I just hope you have it in your heart to forgive me for my mistakes. Thank you.

Something that you have been really hoping for, finally happens. You cry. 

Fat, angry droplets of tears roll down your face and you close your eyes shut as the searing pain spreads in your chest. 

Everything just feels so final and also so fruitless. 

Three little dots appear at the bottom of the screen and you realise that Taehyjng must have noticed that you have read his message. 

Tae 🐻: say something

Tae 🐻: this is making me anxious 😅

Despite your blurry vision and him being the cause of your pain, you feel the need to put him at ease. 

You: i appreciate you being honest with me 

You: I'll reply properly in a while 

You: just let me have a good cry first 

The petty part of you wants him to know that you're crying, you want him to know how hurt you are. 

Tae 🐻: Y/N?

Tae 🐻: are you okay?

You don't reply, not having it in yourself to lie.

You let your tears flow as you cry silently.

It's too much for you. You feel used. You feel like a rebound. You feel like a bridge he walked on to reach his destination and to move on from his past. Your heart feels walked all over. Your love feels irrelevant. 

It's true that you wanted to make him feel good. You wanted him to move on from the hurt caused by Kira. You wanted him to feel good about himself. All because you loved him. But you never thought your love was so disposable to him. That it would only be the means for him to move on to someone else. 

What's worse is, despite all of that you understand. You understand that it wasn't a conscious choice of his to hurt you. He, himself, wasn't aware that he was using your love to heal himself. 

It's worse because a part of you feels bitter and angry. If you were the one who helped him get over his hurt, shouldn't he show at least a bit of loyalty to you? You feel angry because he didn't communicate, he left you in the dark and just assumed that you must have been detached enough from your feelings for you to not be bothered by his new relationship. But then a part of you understands that as well. 

With Taehyung, it's a tug of war where you want to be mad at him and feel betrayed by him but no matter what, your love for him makes you see things from his point of view. 

In a way, you find it surprising as well because you never realised just how deep your love runs. Seeing their side of things despite the hurt they have caused? Isn't that love at its purest? However, that makes you ache in pain as well. You loved him as your own. Only to realise that his love for you was merely an infatuation.

His love for you was shallow. 

You think it would have been better if he were an asshole whom you could just hate. It would have been easier for you because you'd know he wasn't worth your time. But how do you handle all of this when he's one of your closest friends? 

That's a question you'd probably need time to answer. You need time to let the stinging pain in your chest subside. You need time to let yourself process the silent heartbreak you're going through. 

With shaky hands and blurry vision, you block Taehyung. 

—--------------------------------------------------------

Last Friday of every month, all your colleagues go out to have dinner and drinks together. You enjoy accompanying them because honestly, it is nice and fun, almost like a little treat to yourself. However, this week, you're not really sure you'd like that. You don't have the energy to socialise.

One might argue that with recent events in mind, the best thing to do would probably be just that, to socialise, as it would take your mind off things that have been bugging you. But then you have always been the type who needs energy to socialise rather than the kind who energises themselves from socialising. 

You have almost completed packing your bag when someone taps on your shoulders. 

"You're coming with us today, right?" Shanaya queries, having a suspicious glint in her eyes as if she's already aware of your plans of not joining. 

Shaking your head softly, you confirm her suspicions. However, Shanaya is having none of that.

"You have to come," she insists, sounding determined. "It's my birthday treat."

You're thoroughly surprised at the information. "It's your birthday today? Oh my god, I'm so sorry–"

"It's not today, it's tomorrow," she cuts you off. "But tomorrow is off so it's an early birthday treat."

She looks at you with such pleading eyes that you cannot bring yourself to say no to her. Reluctantly you smile and the next thing you know, you're being wrapped in a warm hug. 

"Yay, thank you," she squeals, excited. "Now common, let's go."

As it turns out, today's destination is one stop away. Usually, you all go to someplace that's near and doesn't require transportation. However, Shanaya wanted to take all of you to a particular place that, according to her, serves the best dumplings and noodles. Who can say no to Shanaya, anyway?

As you sit there and wait with the others for the bus to arrive, you look at the screen with Taehyung's conversation open. 

It's only yesterday that you unblocked him. You were well aware that you'd be unblocking him and talking to him again at some point. The friendship was too precious for you to let go. And it's not something you're saying simply because you love him. If you were to look back, Taehyung has never been a bad friend to you. He's been there for you whenever you needed. He has never let you down when it comes to friendship. 

However, you doubt you're ready to talk to him just yet. That doesn't mean you don't want to.

There's just so much that you have to tell him. The little things that have occurred over the course of the two weeks that you had him blocked. Everything feels a little incomplete unless shared with him. 

Your fingers hover over his profile picture and you hesitate to click on it. He has uploaded a new profile picture and you wonder if it is too weird to just stare at it.

"Y/N?" 

The sound of your name startles you and while trying to hide your phone screen, you accidentally end up clicking on the small call button right next to the profile picture. 

Shit. Shit. Shit. 

You cut the call immediately and stare at the screen which now shows his name at the top of your call logs. He's gonna see a missed call from you, shit. 

"The bus is here, Y/N."

Oh right, that must be why Mike had called for you. You quickly gather your thoughts and get on the bus, shying away from the worried look Shanaya throws your way. 

When you get a seat on the bus, the first thing you do is shoot him a text. You indeed are not ready to talk to him but your accidental call has ruined your plans. 

You: I'm so sorry

You: i called you by mistake

You know it will probably be a while until he sees your call and your text and it's a good thing that you have your co-workers to accompany you. That way you'd be distracted enough to not fret about it unnecessarily. 

All of you get down when your stop arrives and make your way inside the small restaurant. 

The chatter and the giggles and the latest gossip about your boss is enough for you to temporarily ignore the sinking sadness that sits at the pit of your stomach. 

"Y/N, drinks?"

Your colleagues are well familiar with the answer to this question. You don't prefer drinking. The reason behind that, however, is not known to them.

Like the majority of people, you enjoy getting drunk and letting it loose. However, you're the kind of drunk who gets giggly and finds every little thing amusing. And for some reason, you feel comfortable to let that part of you out, only in the presence of a few people. Four, to be exact. 

One, your best friend. Two, Min Yoongi. Three, Lee Sana. And four, Kim Taehyung. 

Needless to say, you hardly ever get the chance to get drunk. 

The usual answer rests on the tip of your tongue, but there's also this desperation for you to let go of the heaviness. You really could do with some giggles and amusement.

"I'd probably have some whiskey," you reply with a shy unsure smile as your colleagues cheer.

The night somehow refuses to come to an end as you all soon find yourselves seated on the floor of Kate's apartment, in a circle. It starts off with some dancing and then Nitesh takes up the guitar and starts singing. He's a good singer, you can appreciate that and everyone's having fun with big smiles on their faces as they clap along with the beats. 

You have had three shots so far and for the love of god, you still feel that melancholy. It heightens when you realise you're sad in such a fun environment. Despite wanting to join them in their fun, your mind keeps wondering what it would be like if Taehyung were here. Gosh, it's been so long since the both of you have hung out and truthfully, it has never bothered you before. Whatever communication you two had was more than enough for you. Sharing the little details about your day, sending him silly stickers, all that held more meaning to you than he probably ever realised. That was much more intimate to you than anything physical.

You shake your head to yourself when you realise you're here being sad over a guy who wasn't even your boyfriend. It's so ridiculous. 

But then again, despite the lack of a label, you were loyal to him with your entirety.

Geez, the alcohol seemingly has made you more sensitive. 

"You sure are having fun," Shanaya comments. "I'm assuming the alcohol didn't help much?"

It doesn't take rocket science for someone to figure out that if a person who's never said yes to drinks before suddenly willingly says yes to them, there must be some pain they are trying to numb. 

"Surprisingly, no."

She hums. "Wanna talk about it?" 

Shanaya has asked this question to you multiple times over the span of the last few days. Never has it made you feel as if it's coming from a place where she is prying for details. It has only made you feel as if she's letting you know she's all ears, whenever you need her. Each time, you have shrugged as if it's not a big deal, as if it's not important enough for you to talk about. However, now, you really could do with a shoulder to cry on.

Hence, you vent and even amid all the noise and music, she intently listens to your words without interrupting even once. 

When you finish, she releases a heavy sigh. "That's what you meant when you said it was complicated."

You chuckle at the reminder of the response you had given to your then-new co-workers, to being asked about your love life. You were so cautious of hurting Taehyung, having no idea that it was going to be him, hurting you.

"Do you plan on being friends with him?" 

You don't miss the edge her tone has, as if she believes it's not worth it. Either that, or she thinks it's not possible to be friends with someone who's hurt you like that.

"I do," your reply is instantaneous. 

"Don't you feel angry?"

"I do," of course you are angry. It would be absurd if you were not. 

"Are you sure that is a good idea?"

You're not. You know the dynamic between you and Taehyung would never be the same again. Things would be different. You have now realised that things which meant a lot to you, perhaps never held the same meaning to him. The dynamic is bound to change. But is that good enough of a reason to cut your friendship off?

"He's only a human. People fall in love and sometimes, they fall out of love. I do not control the way he feels and when it comes to love, I don't think any of us have a control over who we fall for or when we fall," you release a sigh. Maybe it's all the more difficult for you because you still love him despite everything. "He's not in the wrong for falling for someone just because it's not me. I wish he would have not kept me in the dark but we all make mistakes, we all mess up."

"But more importantly, he's a friend first and he's always been an incredible friend to me. Now, I wouldn't be a good friend if I were to ever entertain the idea of making him choose between me and his happiness, would I?" 

She remains quiet for a moment, observing you closely. "Do you mean all that you said?"

You nod. 

She chuckles. "Well then, you have one of the purest hearts I have ever come across."

—--------------------------------------------------------

You were aware that there were unread texts from Taehyung but had refused to open them until morning. The night was exhausting and more than anything, you wanted to sleep. However, when morning came rolling, there was no avoiding opening his messages. 

Tae 🐻: why are you suddenly being so formal? 😂

Tae 🐻: it's completely fine.

Relief courses through your veins at his casual tone. You don't know how you'd have responded had he mentioned you blocking him seemingly out of nowhere. However, there's a small part of you that remains curious if he had even realised you blocked him. Nevertheless, you'd much rather put all of that behind you and move forward.

You: i was randomly scrolling through my phone and the next thing i knew, my phone was calling you 

Tae 🐻: lmao 

Tae 🐻: blame it on the phone, yes

You smile. Going back to being friends might not be that difficult. 

You two chat a bit and catch up with each other about things the both of you have been up to recently. You lose track of time as you make yourself a cup of tea, refusing to let your phone down, feeling excited at the thought of telling him about the things you have been up to. 

Tae 🐻: well i have something to tell you

You: uh oh

You: go on

Tae 🐻: so last day me and Bridget went on a date 

Tae 🐻: and things got steamy 👉👈

Tae 🐻: if you know what i mean

You very well know what he means.

Your stomach sinks in disappointment.

It's not because you're jealous or that the thought of Taehyung with someone else makes you feel disheartened, you have moved past that. Rather, you feel disappointed that he thought it was something appropriate to mention to you. 

Had it been anyone else in some other scenario, you'd have had no issue. Friends, close ones especially, tend to discuss these sorts of things, don't they? However, this is Taehyung and keeping the recent events in mind, he should not have mentioned it to you at all. Especially not when, his new relationship had made you feel as if he didn't bother to think of you, once. 

He keeps on going about how it was one of the best nights of his life but you don't find it in yourself to play pretend and entertain him. Although you don't directly ask him to stop, you don't reply to his texts either.

Tae 🐻: Y/N? 

The screen reads when he's done and probably upon the realisation that you haven't said anything for a long time. 

You: nice

Oh, how you wish technology was advanced enough for the text to be read aloud on his phone in a sarcastic tone.

You: let me tell you about yesterday

You: we went back to Kate's place 

You: and i got drunk simply because i was feeling low and sad and depressed and was looking for an escape 

You: but that didn't help, only enhanced what i was already feeling

You could have probably avoided saying this but then you wanted to say it. You don't know if he'll put two and two together but it's your own way of telling him that things are still sensitive.

Tae 🐻: you sound like a typical guy whose heart has been broken 😂 

A loud laugh escapes your lips. Gosh, is this the guy you have been crying over for weeks? 

Wow.

—--------------------------------------------------------

Taehyung has let you down, as a friend. More than once. 

A few days back, he'd asked if he could send you a poem that he'd written. You had always known he liked writing stuff and hadn't thought much of it. However, upon asking what it was about, he had replied 'newfound love'. Your reply to which had been, 'In that case, I'm not interested'. 

You didn't care how that sounded, you were not gonna put up with this bullshit just because it would be impolite. 

With each passing day and with each small incident where you feel as if your feelings are totally disregarded, your disappointment keeps growing. You really had not expected this kind of behaviour from Taehyung. 

One of the main reasons you had fallen for him was the way he seemed so emotionally wise. He was aware and attentive towards the people around him and was always kind. His recent attitude contradicts all of that.

There is a part of you that also recognises how his recent behaviour has made you detached. You could not say that the Taehyung you fell in love with and the Taehyung now, are the same. In a very twisted way, it made accepting the fact that there's nothing between the two of you, except friendship much easier. 

Tae 🐻: Y/N

Tae 🐻: I messed up. 

The text comes at around one in the morning. The only reason you're awake is the report that's due in two days. But the incoming text puts your fingers to a pause as worry clouds your senses. 

Is he okay? 

You: what happened? 

Tae 🐻: i messed up 

Tae 🐻: i feel so embarrassed

You: can you stop being vague? 

Tae 🐻: i sent a vm to Bridget of me singing TS 

You couldn't help rolling your eyes when you read the words. Huh, you should have seen it coming. 

Unlike other times, for some odd reason, you find yourself leaning towards the idea of entertaining him. Perhaps it's because you haven't had a proper conversation with him for a long time. And also perhaps, because you know this won't go on for long. 

You: so?

Tae 🐻: she is a huge TS fan 

Tae 🐻: she asked me to sing one of her favourite songs

Tae 🐻: and i cannot ever bring myself to say no to her

Tae 🐻: but like now that i listen back to the audio i sound terrible and i maybe did a British accent while singing

Understandably, you can see where he's coming from. The nervousness that comes with making a gesture for someone you adore and then feeling embarrassed about it, worrying whether they found it romantic or did you make a fool of yourself. And less than one month of being in a relationship is not enough to quieten the nervous jitters. 

So, you tell him what you would have, had it been any other friend. Upon further chatting you realise he genuinely feels like crawling inside a hole and never coming out. It doesn't surprise you, Taehyung has always been like that, going for the big gestures and self-doubt creeping in later.

You let yourself enjoy the normalcy and pretend that Taehyung is just another friend of yours and that he isn't someone who broke your heart.

—--------------------------------------------------------

Your phone has been buzzing and pinging since morning. Midnight to be specific. Birthday wishes have been flowing in with notes and gifs and with each message you feel more appreciated than you feel the rest three sixty-four days of the year. 

However, with each notification sound, there has also been that hope and expectation that maybe this one would be from Taehyung.

He had texted you a few days back reminding you of your upcoming birthday and although it's afternoon already, you don't really believe that he has forgotten the day altogether. 

When evening rolls around, you start growing sceptic. You squirm in your sofa, finally acknowledging that it's very well a possibility that your birthday might have slipped his mind. It makes you go back to the long, seven-hundred-word, letter he had written for your birthday, last year. 

The words make you smile.

Do you know how amazing you are? I don't think you do and it will be my job to make you see that.

Sometimes, I think I don't deserve you with how kind and loving you are but I'm so incredibly grateful for you that no amount of words would ever be enough.

I have never met someone like you, ever. 

Only a few lines from the massive paragraph that his greeting text was and the corner of your lips lift up. However, the moment is broken when you realise you're smiling. 

You shake your head as sadness fills you. You cannot let yourself recall old memories and feel the way they used to make you. It's not an option anymore.

Locking your screen, you sigh. You won't lie, you had really wanted a text from him. Anything that would show you that he still cares for you and the friendship between the both of you still held a chance. It's no wonder that you have been seeking some sort of reassurance after everything that he has done. 

It's around eleven at night that Taehyung's name first appears on your notification bar. You grin wide and open your text, glad to have been proven wrong and feeling stupid to have considered the idea of him forgetting your birthday. 

A link to a YouTube video.

Your grin disappears just as quickly and disappointment like nothing you have ever felt before, makes its way to your heart. 

You leave him on seen.

A day passes and you wonder if he will send at least a belated wish, apologising for not wishing you any sooner. But nope 

It's the day after that, the second day past your birthday when you check for any messages from him and you are led to his stories. It's slides of pictures of him and Bridget and the caption is him singing praises of her and telling the world how much in love he is because it's her birthday. 

That's your last straw.

It's probably a very small issue, forgetting birthdays and all. But to you, it's not. It just adds up to the pile of things that have made you feel like you were the only one who was taking into consideration the friendship that was at stake.

Plus, it cannot be that difficult to remember your birthday when his girlfriend's birthday is literally two days after yours. 

You have had enough. You need to walk out of Taehyung's life.  

Considering all that had made you fall for Taehyung, it's incredibly hard for you to believe that he doesn't know what he is doing and that he has forgotten basic decency. The option that was left with you, didn't make sense to you either because it implied he let you down intentionally. But the Taehyung you knew would never hurt a fly. 

It made you wonder if it was simply a result of his honeymoon phase that he had forgotten to consider how his actions could hurt people. Maybe he was too elated to think things through.  The empathetic part of you understood. But then you shook that away, knowing very well that if you were in his position, irrespective of how happy and high you were, you would never do that. 

Maybe you had realised that this was coming from the very day, he hadn't thought twice before mentioning his intimate moments with Bridget. But, boy oh boy, had you hoped to be wrong.

You had given him opportunities to prove you wrong, to give you a reason to stay but he only kept giving you reasons as to why you should leave.

It's an odd sensation that washes over you when you come to the conclusion that this isn't worth it anymore. 

You feel sad that the friendship is coming to an end. You're sure you'd miss his company and that there would be days when you mourn the friendship that once used to be. You know there would be times when you'd resent him and there would also be times when you'd feel angry at yourself for giving so much of you to him. 

But you won't ever regret your choice of leaving him. 

One thing this whole ordeal with Taehyung has made you realise is how deeply you love. How even in the midst of hurt, you were happy for him and how you saw and loved him for what he was and not for what he could be or for what he offered you. It made you take pride in the way you love. You gave him the purest form of love. 

A life where you and Taehyung are not friends, won't be your loss. It would be his. Irrespective of whether he realises that or not.

You feel oddly poweful with the knowledge that there was nothing lacking in your love and you'd never dishonour your love by staying where it isn't valued, appreciated and seen. 

But you also have a lot to say to him. You are not going to just block him and let him wonder why you did that. No, you'd tell him exactly why you left. 

—--------------------------------------------------------

It took you a couple of days to get down everything you wanted to say. There were times when you felt conscious of the ever-growing length of your letter and you had to shake off that feeling because this was going to be the last interaction between the both of you. Why stop yourself from saying everything you want to just because you're worried it'll be lengthy? 

You read the words one last time, wanting to make sure that you feel satisfied. 

Hello Taehyung, 

I hope you're doing fine. I wouldn't know how you're doing because we haven't had a proper conversation in quite some time. Or at least that is how it has felt to me. Nevertheless, I'm writing this because there's loads that I need to get off my chest. So, here we go.

When I saw you for the first time and we talked, I could feel you carried a lot of pressure on your shoulders. Almost like, you had something to prove, like you wanted to show that you weren't what you were perceived to be. Or maybe you wanted to prove that you were more than just what meets the eye. I didn't know what in particular. It felt like you wanted to be seen. 

And would you believe, I grew a soft spot for you? Do you know why? Because somewhere, I felt the same way too. 

I also knew we would be great friends, lol. You know how? Because I knew you had a heart of gold. You cared for others, you were thoughtful and kind. However, I could feel that you have a habit of being harsh on yourself and it didn't sit well with me. From the very first time we talked, I wanted to be a good friend to you, someone you could rely on, someone you could trust and someone who could possibly make you be a little less harsh on yourself. 

Perhaps with the weak spot, I also grew protective of you.

You were desperate for love and at the same time felt unworthy of it. I didn't know why though. I didn't know what had you believing so lowly about yourself. But then you told me about Kira, and it all made sense. 

It made sense why you felt unworthy and why you felt the need to prove that you were more than what others saw. Because, you believed Kira's words. You really thought you were unlovable. 

Instead of feeling the satisfaction of  being proved right, I felt so angry at Kira. I may have clawed her eyes out in my mind more than once. 

After learning the scars that she left on you, it only made me wish you could see yourself the way I do. I wished you could see that there was nothing you had to do to be loved except for just being you.

You may wonder why I'm suddenly saying all this. Well, let's just say it's necessary.

When you told me you were falling for me, I was surprised but then I felt myself feeling so warm at the thought of you liking me. It took me a few minutes to realise that I was falling for you too. 

But that was it. 

We never put a label on what we were and I was okay with it. Because I was okay with what we had, I never asked for anything because you were happy. You were also such a great friend, someone who I could talk to anything and everything about. What more could I ask for?

What's more? I could tell you were slowly coming out of whatever shell you were put in by Kira. I can't quite explain how it made me feel to see you smile more freely, to see you be more confident and be sure of yourself. But to put it lightly, it made me feel damn good lol.

I knew I had some part to play in it. I just didn't know that was the only part you wanted me to play. 

I moved past all that, trust me. You using my love as a rebound, making a girlfriend without even letting me know once, I moved past all that. Because, I trusted you when you told me you were confused and confusion is never intentional, is it? 

It hurt like a bitch to think that was all my love meant to you. But it was okay, you didn't mean to hurt me. You cared about me. You cared about our friendship. You valued it. 

Or so you said. 

I don't know if you meant it when you said it. But in case you did mean it, here are a few things not to do to the girl you used as a rebound and intend to keep the friendship with.

First, do not mention that you had sex with your new girlfriend. 

Second, do not be dumb enough to say "You sound like a typical guy whose heart has been broken" when you are the guy who's caused the damage. 

Third, do not send her the song you sang for your girlfriend and seek comfort to soothe the embarrassment you feel.

Fourth, do not ask her to read the poems you wrote for your girlfriend.

Fifth, do not forget her birthday when your girlfriend's is just two days later. 

These things didn't hurt me as much as it disappointed me. Would you believe, I laughed when you called me a typical heartbroken guy? When I got drunk the day before, my head was filled with thoughts of you and my heart was heavy with the knowledge that I was only a rebound. That day, even in the midst of alcohol, I chose our friendship over everything. I chose to forgive you. I chose to love you, still. But when you mentioned what you did, I just found it so funny to think that this was the guy I was thinking so much about and was so sad about. 

As it turns out, I'm not much fond of thoughtless people. 

But still, I hoped that somehow you'd give me a reason to stay. All you did, however, was turn a blind eye to my feelings and disrespected me.

If you were to ask me, whether my love for you is romantic or platonic, I wouldn't be able to tell. I have never sat and thought about it. All I know is I loved you, in one of the most unselfish ways possible. 

But that's not to say I don't realise how I deserve to be treated. And that's not to say that I'd stay somewhere where I'm an afterthought. 

When I said, I was happy for you and Bridget I really meant it and I hope you don't think that your relationship ever had a role to play in this decision of mine. It didn't, it was solely you that made me choose this option.

But this friendship of ours has run its course.

I would never disrespect myself by putting up with your disrespect. I loved you as long as you were worth it. But the moment you took my love for granted was the very moment you lost my respect and love, both. 

If you have made it to the end, then congrats! I didn't know if you'd read the whole thing but truth be told I don't particularly care about you reading it either. I wrote this for myself, not for you. 

Before I finish this long-ass letter, let me tell you something; you have lost one of the best people you'd ever meet in this lifetime. 

Thank you,

With Love,

The purest form.

Jeon Jungkook

His words echo in your mind and after an elongated pause, you find it in yourself to respond. “What do you mean?”

Jungkook gulps, hating how controlled your facial expressions are. In the months of knowing you, he has never seen you try this hard to hide your emotions. “Me and Niki are not actually a couple.”

“Thank you for rephrasing the sentence but I am afraid that it does not make things any clearer for me.”

Jungkook takes a sharp inhale and meets your eyes with uncertainty. “It’s just a PR stunt.”

It takes a few moments for the words to register but when they do, things start making sense, almost like puzzle pieces falling in place.

Namjoon’s hesitance in answering your question about the truth of their relationship. His lack of shock to the words you had heard Niki speak and most importantly, why Niki might have said those words. The whole relationship is not real to begin with.

“But, why?” The words leave your lips without your permission, before you’re able to catch them.

For a moment, he hesitates, wondering if it’s his place to say a few of the things he will have to, to make things clear.  But then he shakes off the worry, knowing Niki won’t mind.

“Both of our fandom, for some reason, ship us together. You know the whole ‘both are maknaes’ thing. Nevertheless, both of our companies thought it would be mutually beneficial for the two of us to put up this false act that we are dating.”

“How is it supposed to be mutually beneficial?” It doesn’t make sense to you. One of the oddest and most toxic traits of the kpop industry is how idols are expected to be loyal to their fans by remaining single. How then, a public relationship is supposed to garner anything except for unnecessary attention and hate?

“Niki is well, dating a youtuber. A female youtuber and pictures of them hanging out together didn’t take long to make it to the internet. Although at the beginning, everyone thought they were just good friends, soon there were questions as to whether it was just a simple friendship and well, people were not really happy with that idea,” he sighs, feeling tired just from thinking about everything that had led to this whole ordeal. “It wasn’t only about Niki dating a girl, it was also about her dating someone that wasn’t me. And of course, it was her girlfriend’s fault for coming between two people who are 'meant to be'. All of which ultimately made it incredibly difficult for the two of them to be at peace.”

You can imagine. The thought makes you sympathise with both of them. From Jungkook's words, it's clear the target was Niki’s girlfriend but you are sure it couldn’t have been easy for Niki to watch someone she loves hurt like that.

You understand Niki’s part of the deal. Putting up this font, would stop the threats and hate aimed at them but what was Jungkook supposed to get from this?

Jungkook looks at you and nods, acknowledging the unasked question. "When the offer first came, our company had turned it down, not seeing how it could benefit me. But I was the one who insisted and agreed."

"Why?" 

His discomfort grows and he swallows nervously, trying to gather his thoughts. "People are obsessed with me and Niki to the point where it's very predictable that they would hate it if someday I were to date someone who isn't her. I thought it would be good if we did this thing and people believed that we gave it a shot but it didn't work out. That way it would be one less thing I'd have to worry about while dating someone."

You put the thought behind of how it seems incredibly far-fetched and nod. He has answered your question about the nature of their relationship and why it was necessary. However, you still have a bunch of questions about a lot of things–starting with how crushed you felt when he moved you as Namjoon's make-up artist out of nowhere–but you do not wish to let them see the light of the day. 

Turning away, you start shuffling with some of the make-up products, indicating that the conversation is done. 

"Please say something," Jungkook pleads, tormented by your silence. 

"There's nothing more to say," you mutter, keeping away any emotion from being shown. 

"That can't be true."

You hate how sure he sounds. As if he is aware of every thought that's running in your head. As if he knows you a little too well. You absolutely despise how you might have believed the notion, once. Now, however, you do not want to. Because that'd mean he knew exactly how much hurt, his ignorance and pretence as if you don't even exist, caused you. 

"Y/N, please. We haven't talked for a long time. Please don't shut me out." 

Technically, you have two options. One, to keep ignoring him. Two, to snap at him and let every bit of your anger out. You had initially planned on sticking to option number one as it would make you look just as indifferent as Jungkook. However, now you find the option of letting words out without a filter, very appealing. 

"I know, I messed up but just talk to me–" the sound of a shaky exhale meets your ears, "–I miss spending time with you."

Well, that's some audacity. 

In the blink of an eye, you're facing Jungkook and taking several steps in his direction. You stop only a few steps away from him but you're close enough for him to notice the agony and pure rage storming through your eyes. 

"You better shut your mouth, Jeon." 

Jungkook flinches at your warning tone. However, he refuses to take the hint. "Y/N, ignoring me isn't going to solve–"

"Trust me, I'm not trying to solve anything," you speak through gritted teeth. "I'm just doing what I think is the right thing to do after someone disrespects you immensely."

"I wasn't trying to disrespect you," he claims, desperately trying to make you believe in something you don't buy for even a second.

"Yeah, ghosting me out of nowhere is not disrespecting me at all," your voice drops with sarcasm 

He feels his heart drop when you use the word 'ghosting'. Did you think that's what he did? Is that what it looked like? Gosh, this has all gotten messed up and he's the one to be blamed.

"I didn't ghost you," he mumbles, unable to look into your eyes and the sight of it causes all the pain that you had buried, to come to the surface. 

"Then please explain what it was," you voice waivers and you immediately hate yourself for showing weakness. "Please tell me what you thought you were doing by replacing me without even showing the basic decency to inform me that, yourself?"

He gulps, wondering if you'd even believe what he has to say. Even if you do, would you be willing to look past his stupidity?

"I found your note in my bag", you visibly flinch at the mention of the note. You had intentionally kept from mentioning your little confession, praying to whatever god is out there that somehow the note had been damaged before it reached the hands of the person they were meant to find. 

Jungkook notices your change of expression as it turns from hurt to embarrassed to anger and he despises himself for making you feel like that. "I had to make a quick decision and I didn't think you'd like to be my make up artist while I was fake dating Niki, especially without you having any knowledge about the fake part."

You stare at him blankly and try to process what he was saying. Did he–did he think he was doing you a favour by cutting you off?

You scoff, turn around and start packing your things with the intention of leaving the room. You're so done with this conversation.

When Jungkook understands your intention, he's quick on his feet and rushes to be right next to you. "Just give me the chance to explain myself fully."

You don't reply, your insides fuming.

"Y/N please," he begs. "Just hear me out once. Then I'll accept whatever it is that you decide for the both of us."

"I'm not gonna stand here and hear you speak utter bullshit that does nothing but let me down further."

Your voice comes with such a sense of finality that Jungkook knows, no matter how much he begs and pleads, you won't be giving him the opportunity to speak his side of things. 

Hence, he doesn't stop you when you walk past him and leave the room. But it only makes him more desperate for the day when you finally find it in your heart to give him a chance. Just one.

—-----------------------------------------------------

Jungkook has been persistent. Perhaps a little too persistent with his attempts to earn your forgiveness. Or at least that's what you assume the bouquets of flowers and little notes you find everyday at work are for. 

It's not only the flowers, it's also his constant texting and voicemails. His texts vary from a simple 'hi, what are you doing' to 'please, i miss you' and his voicemails have been a mix of him telling you about his day (something he used to do regularly when you were his makeup artist) to a more emotional version of his texts begging you to talk to him. 

You won't lie, his incessant pleadings have made you curious what more could he possibly have to say. What could be so different from what he has already said that he is so desperate? 

On one hand, you find an odd sense of satisfaction from not responding to Jungkook despite all his efforts. You don't know what that makes you but after the hurt and embarrassment you felt to the point where you had to numb yourself to block those emotions out, his tries and attempts feel like an ointment to your wounds. On the other hand, however, is a voice nagging you as to how, this cannot go on for long. The huge bouquets that wait for you everyday are soon going to catch attention and if anyone were to catch a hint of who it is from…gosh, you don't want to imagine that.

But when you will find it in yourself to have a conversation with him, still remains unknown. All you know is whenever that will be, it will be solely because you don't want word to go out. Yes, that's all it will be. 

Today when you walk into Namjoon's dressing room, there's another bouquet waiting for you. The sight of it causes you to sigh. You don't know what Namjoon thinks of this but you're thankful that he hasn't mentioned it yet. That however, made it quite clear that he has some idea as to who they are from.

You let the flowers be where they are. You have never really taken them home or put them in water, afraid that it would be interpreted as you being accepting of his efforts, when you're far from it. You're still hurt and angry. 

If anything, sometimes you despise walking into a room full of flowers as they serve as a reminder of the thoughts you had before confessing to him. You remember thinking how confessing felt like putting a delicate unbloomed flower in someone's hand and whether the bud gets to bloom or not, depends on the person you're confessing to. 

If only you had known of the thorns you would be exposed to, back then, you'd never have confessed. 

The door swings open softly and Namjoon walks in. "Good morning, Y/N."

"Good morning," you greet him back with a smile. 

"So what's on card for today?" He asks before taking his usual seat. 

"There's nothing much for today, just rehearsals and then you have a v-live," you mumble. "But firstly I need to do your weekly facial."

He huffs. "Is it the one that requires you putting a lot of slimy stuff on my face and it stays on for like thirty minutes?" 

"Yep," you reply with a light laugh. Despite what he says, you have learnt that Namjoon quite enjoys his facial sessions. Unlike a certain someone. 

Your smile falters and your sudden change of mood doesn't go unnoticed by Namjoon. 

"Have you considered speaking to Jungkook?" He asks after a brief moment of silence. 

You're taken aback by his words. Namjoon has always avoided speaking on the matter. He has never even queried as to what you do with the flowers. Hence, his direct way of questioning has you fumbling with words. 

"I d–haven't," you change your wording, fearing 'I don't want to', might just be a little too rude. 

However, your choice of answer is put to vain with the very next question he asks. "Do you want to?" 

"I don't want to," you softly shake your head, mildly afraid how Namjoon will interpret it.

He simply nods, without any trace of judgement. "I'm not saying this because I'm picking sides, but I have known Jungkook since he was a kid and I can tell that he really is sorry. 

"Whether to forgive him or not, is completely on you. But put a little trust on him that he must have some reason behind doing what he did. Just hear him out once."

You keep quiet, unsure what to say. Thankfully, Namjoon understands that and soon changes the topic of conversation to something more light-hearted. 

Hours later, when everything comes to a close and it's time for you to leave, you find yourself hesitating. Namjoon's words simply refuse to leave your mind. Put a little trust in him. How can you, when he's let you down in every way possible? When he has betrayed your trust in ways that still keep hurting you? 

You gulp when you realise there's probably no end to the hurting until you have a chat with Jungkook and hear his side. At least, that way you will know his reasoning behind everything and it will hopefully stop your self loathing for putting the note in his bag. Even if all he gives is excuses, you'd at least have the satisfaction of having heard him out. Later maybe a week, or a month from now, when your emotions subside, you wouldn't have this unscratched itch of not knowing what he had to say. 

Maybe, maybe it's for the best that you talk to him.

—-----------------------------------------------------

"Come in," Jungkook calls out in response to the knock at his door and is visibly surprised when you walk in. He quickly gets up from his seat, stuffs his phone in his pocket and with a nervous voice asks, "would you like some coffee?"

You shake your head. You're not here for coffee. "No, thank you. I'm here to talk to you."

He nods as his nervousness spikes. This is what he has wanted and hoped for so long, but now that you're here, he doubts you will believe him. What if you don't? Even worse, what if you do and still don't forgive him?

The both of you get seated and your fingers anxiously play with the strap of your handbag. "What is it that you have been wanting to tell me?"

Jungkook sighs. Pushing the nervousness away, he knows that the only thing in his power is to tell you his side of things. Otherwise, he's powerless. 

"For the things I said last day, to make sense, I would have to mention that I like you," he cannot find it in himself to look at you as he says that. "I've liked you for a long time."

The words take you by surprise, and your mouth parts in shock. The shock then morphs into disbelief and denial. He did not just confess to liking you.

"But it's never that simple when you're a famous K-pop idol," something bitter coats his words and he looks defeated. "The consequences of dating me, is something that one doesn't realise until they face it for themselves."

Jungkook has grown a thick skin. But you? He doesn't want you to be someone who ever has to go through things that require you to build a thick skin. He doubts he will ever forgive himself if he were to see you beaten up by harsh words and constant criticism, all because of your association to him.

"I wanted to tell you how I felt but just the sheer terror of what you may have to go through, kept me from doing so," an unwanted shiver runs through his body when he recalls the moments where the fluttering in his chest would always be accompanied by a heavy sinking in his stomach. "It wasn't my choice to stress about these things but I couldn't help myself considering that associating with me had consequences."

Your face falls with each word that leaves his lips. 

"It was choosing between giving into my feelings and listening to logic. I tried to be logical and practical for as long as I could. Until, I just couldn't," a humourless chuckle escapes his lips. "I remember thinking that I just need to tell you how you make me feel."

He doesn't voice how there was a part of him that had wished you'd not reciprocate his feelings. That way, even after his sheer selfishness, things would be fine. 

"It was around the time I decided on confessing to you, that I learnt about the proposition from Niki's agency. Call me incredibly stupid but I thought if I did this, I'd at least do something instead of sitting and dreading with my hands tied." Jungkook shakes his head, finding it cruel that even after all this, he somehow managed to mess everything up. 

Your mouth parts unknowingly when the pieces click. Jungkook's decision to date Niki for the cameras, didn't come out of nowhere and it wasn't as far-fetched as you thought. His decision had come from a place of anxiety where he felt powerless. 

"But then I found that note," he cannot help but recall that day fondly. He felt like a kid and often found himself smiling, looking into the mirror. However, that joy was soon wiped off when the situation sank in. "I was so excited and happy, but then I realised that I had already agreed to date Niki."

You hardly blink as Jungkook speaks and due to that, you don't miss the way a smile appears on his lips. But it's gone as soon as it appears, as if he catches himself slipping and reprimands himself for it. It makes you consider the possibility if he was receptive to your confession in a positive way. 

"I didn't know what to do, I couldn't imagine letting you know that I felt the same but then going out and holding another woman's hand. Even if it's for the cameras, it's–," he closes his eyes shut as if pained, "–it's horrible."

"I couldn't do that but I also needed to make a quick decision. I thought the only way to go about things was to postpone answering your confession. After the announcement of the breakup with Niki, I thought I could talk to you then and clear things out. At that moment, that was the only option that made sense to me."

His words take you back to the day when you were filled with nervous excitement only for it to be replaced with dread and heartbreak when you learnt that Jungkook had replaced you as his makeup artist, just like that. 

"It was stupid, I know," he mutters in a small voice. "I don't have anything to say in my defence except for admitting that I messed things up and I didn't realise what it must have looked like to you, until it was too late." 

He paused for a few moments, looking exhausted. "I-I am sorry for everything. I know it's hard to believe but hurting you was the last thing I wanted to do. I really just wanted to make things right. If you can, please, forgive me."

You sense that to be the end of everything Jungkook had to say. The way he looks at the floor and refuses to look at you, makes you want to comfort him. But your feelings are too muddled, you're too confused and there's a lot that you have learnt that has left you surprised. You don't think you're in the state of mind to make decisions now. 

"Thank you for telling me everything," you keep your voice soft. It gives Jungkook the courage to finally look up at you and his breath hitches when he realises you aren't looking at him with your gaze filled with hate and pain. It gives him hope. "But I need some time to process everything." 

Jungkook nods, knowing that's the best he can ask for at the moment. He's relieved that you aren't dismissing his words and feels incredibly grateful that you are taking time to think things through. He knows that you taking time is more for yourself than for him, but there's a hint of a promise that this is not the end of the conversation, that you'll talk to him again. And that's more than anything Jungkook can ever ask for.

—-----------------------------------------------------

The last few days, your mind has been completely occupied with Jungkook's words. Not only his words but also the way he looked refuses to leave your mind. You couldn't find it in yourself to doubt his genuineness and the fact that he was feeling terrible, was displayed in green neon lights. 

You had to remind yourself repeatedly that it isn't only about how he feels. You should cater to your feelings and figure out what to do next. 

There was also the new revelation that Jungkook liked you. Quite honestly, you didn't know what to do with that information. The whole conversation was melancholic and it must have rubbed off on you for you didn't feel the joy one usually does on learning that their crush likes them back. 

Everything was quite confusing. So much so, that it had taken an entirety of five days for you to sort out your thoughts and approach Jungkook. 

He sits across from you in a pale blue shirt and black trousers, his body language screams that he's nervous and oddly enough it comforts you to know that you aren't the only one feeling that way. 

"After learning everything, I couldn't help but wish you had communicated before. It would have saved the both of us a lot of hurt," you begin with a sombre tone, feeling your heart hurt at the constant overthinking you have had to go through. "Things might have been simpler that way." 

"I know," Jungkook nods, not having a single word to defend himself with. 

You look at him a moment longer wondering if he would try providing  you with a reason for his lack of communication. When he doesn't, you're confused how you're supposed to perceive it. 

On one hand, you'd have liked for him to actually have a proper reason. On the other, you're sure Jungkook is aware of his mistakes and his lack of response somehow gives the impression that he's owning up to everything without making excuses. 

"But what's done is done and there's no changing it," you continue after a small sigh. "It's for the best that we move on from it."

Jungkook's heart shrinks. By moving on do you mean just never acknowledging the feelings you both share for each other? That's exactly what comes to his mind because you feeling the same way you did, despite the hurt he has caused you, sounds too good to be true. He cannot be shameless either to ask you about it directly. He will take whatever you will give him. 

Instead, he asks a question which he knows would eat him alive if he doesn't voice it. "Can you forgive me?" 

"I wouldn't have asked for the both of us to move on, if I hadn't already," and then you do something that makes Jungkook feel like a ton of bricks have been lifted off from his chest. You smile at him.

Forgiving Jungkook wasn't easy. You wanted to hold on to the anger because your pride was hurt and most importantly, you were scared of getting hurt again. But then you also had to think through things logically. 

Jungkook has never had it easy with fame. Nothing could have ever prepared him for the way he has always been under scrutiny and his sudden loss of control over his own life. With time, he learnt that it was for the best to not pay attention to the people who weren't even familiar with him. 

He could overlook and turn deaf to the hate that's thrown his way. However, his loved ones being targeted is something that fills him with guilt to an inexplicable amount. You have seen it yourself. 

The incident isn't that old. A year back, Jungkook had gone out with a bunch of his childhood friends. He was pictured closing the car door for one of them, who so happened to be a girl. That one single shot was enough for the media and internet to decide there must be something more than platonic going between the two. 

You remember the way Jungkook was so troubled and absolutely heartbroken with the hate and threats that were aimed at his friend, for something so simple and it was visible to everyone that he blamed himself for it.

You cannot imagine what kind of stones would be thrown at you if word got out. The information that you're his makeup artist would be a cherry on top. Gold digger, witch, slut, whore; some of the less colourful terms. 

Seeing the way Jungkook suffered, it made sense why he would be so scared to be open about his feelings. You could imagine yourself feeling the same way had it been you being in his place. Seeing someone you care for, getting hate that they absolutely don't deserve, is painful enough for one to believe that it's for the best to keep distance. 

You also imagined what you would have felt had Jungkook admitted his feelings and had told you about the fake dating. Yes, you'd have the knowledge that there was nothing real between him and Niki. However, you'd also have to see them all over the internet and watch people go on and on about how perfect they are. You'd be aware that Jungkook likes you, but you'd also be bitter about how the beginning of your relationship is marked with him publicly dating someone else. It's not exactly a nice feeling. 

One could argue that the way events have turned out, they aren't perfect either. But there's nothing going on between Jungkook and you. At least, not yet. 

That's one thing that you both need to talk about and you really want to clear out everything, at once. Who knows what miscommunication would occur if things were left unsaid, again? 

"I would never intentionally hurt you, Y/N,"Jungkook squirms a little in his seat, ignoring the absence of the weight that has been eating him alive for days. He thinks you're going easy on him and he thinks he doesn't deserve it. 

"I am choosing to trust your words," you reply, having a sense of the turmoil Jungkook seems to be going through. The fact that he is always hard on himself is not unknown to you. "All I ask from you is to not break my trust. And for you to accept that you do not have to burden yourself with responsibilities."

Jungkook knows it's hard for him to not feel like there's always a bunch of responsibilities on his shoulder. Especially when one moment of misjudgement can cause irreversible damage. Despite that, he feels a sense of warmth spread throughout his body at your words. 

"I'll try."

You shoot Jungkook another smile; the second one this evening and he can't help but think that you should really stop giving him hope.

"There's one more thing that we need to talk about," your cheeks turn red and much like Jungkook earlier, it's your turn to squirm in your seat. "You said something about liking me."

You feel awkward at the choice of your words but then you aren't brave enough to start by mentioning your note of confession. 

Jungkook's eyes turn as wide as saucers and his whole face flushes to match the shade of your cheeks. He really wasn't expecting for you to bring it up. "Umm yeah," he nods. 

You feel a spark of impatience and annoyance at his short response. You took it upon yourself to bring the topic to the table and he cannot just spill everything, already? Why make it more difficult for you? 

"Yeah…..so?" You look at him with your brows raised, trying your best to ignore the way you feel like a three year old shy girl, on the inside. 

"I–I do like you," he stutters and looks away, for the umpteenth time, unable to meet your eyes. 

Your heart takes a fucking long jump. Who would have thought Jeon Jungkook would be so shy about admitting his feelings? 

"What should we do about it?" You intentionally use the 'we' for Jungkook to catch the hint that you want to do something about it. 

But of course, he doesn't. 

He speaks sullenly, "I have lost the right to have a say in the matter." 

"I want you to have a say in the matter. Tell me, Jungkook, what do you want?" You refuse to let go of the conversation and for Jungkook to let his guilt swallow him. He messed up, there's no denying that. But you could always acknowledge the fact that his heart was in the right place. 

Feelings of frustration makes his throat clogged up . "I just want to go back and redo things in a different way."

"That's not possible. What do you want to do now?"

He knows what he wants but voicing it, feels being ungrateful towards your forgiveness. It feels like he's being greedy. "What I do want, feels like too much to ask for."

"You'll never know until you ask for it." 

He sighs and reminds himself that you're asking him about the romantic feelings he has admitted to harbouring towards you. He reminds himself to not be selfish and make it about his guilt. If you want to know, he will tell you and he will be honest about it. 

"I want to be with you," his admission is made in a small voice but it doesn't hide the clarity his words have. 

Your breath hitches and you feel the soft pitter patter of your heart that you had missed when he admitted his feelings for you the first time around. 

"When does this fake relationship of yours end?" 

"A month from now."

You nod. "A month from now, take me out on a date and we will see."

Jungkook's eyes snap to yours, not having expected you to speak those words. You shoot him a small smile before getting up and leaving the room. 

—-----------------------------------------------------

SIX MONTHS LATER

"I swear to god, if you don't stay still, I'll intentionally ruin your makeup."

Your threatening low tone goes in through one ear and comes out of the other. "You could never do that."

"Don't test my limits."

A pout makes its appearance. "But that's my favourite thing to do."

You sigh in both astonishment and in love. 

How do you manage to repeat the same routine with the same man everyday and never get tired of it? Maybe it has everything to do with the way your heart keeps stuttering around this man.

No, the man sitting in front of you, is not the global superstar Jeon Jungkook. 

The man sitting in front of you is your boyfriend, Jungkook. 

The official tag on your relationship was put four months ago, after a month of going out on dates. When you say going out, you mean staying in the hybe building and arranging dates in as innovative a way as one can. 

The month in which Jungkook had to pretend to be Nikki's boyfriend only proved to you why it would have been difficult for you had you and Jungkook actually been a thing at the time. It was already painful and as petty and irrational as it may sound, it also made you jealous when you would see articles of the two of them. You're not quite sure how humilated you would have felt if you two were to be dating at the time and to see people comment on how they are a match made in heaven.

That one month, for Jungkook, was a mix of everything. The beginning of the month came with constant doubts and shame where he wondered what he should do when the month is up. He wanted you but he didn't really think he deserved you. But then he had to make up his mind; he made a mistake and he always acknowledged that but it would be so incredibly foolish if he were to let that stop him from being with you. After a week or so, he had made up his mind. He messed up, but boy if he wasn't going to make up for it.  

That whole month was spent with him brainstorming ideas on how he can show his sincerity and be a better man. Somewhere along the line, he had opened up to Niki about it and there's just a hundred percent chance that if he's smiling wide in one of those paparazzi pictures, he's talking about you.

Jungkook has been nothing but the best boyfriend you could have ever asked for. Any hurt or doubt was washed away soon after the both of you started going out. Being with Jungkook was so much more than you could have ever imagined. 

A month after being together, you were back as Jungkook's make-up artist. It was the best way to go about it as it would keep the both of you away from suspicious eyes and give the both of you ample amount of time to spend with each other. 

You both are aware that at some point, you'd have to inform the agency of the nature of your relationship as that'd be better than them finding it out from other sources. You're not quite sure what would be left of your job, but Jungkook seems quite sure that you won't be fired and that the members together, would somehow manage the higher authorities to make their rules more flexible. 

Jungkook isn't worried about the consequences with hybe, but he still finds himself stressing about the day the news becomes public. That is where you reassure him, that whatever happens, you both will get through it, together. You also remind him to not fret about it too much, because there's a long way to go before things are made public. For the time being, it's just the two of you. 

"No wait, that's actually my second favourite thing," Jungkook corrects himself. "My top favourite might just be kissing you."

You fight the blush trying to make an appearance and ask, "might?"

"The last time you kissed me was ten minutes ago. Forgive me for forgetting what it was like to be kissed by you."

As cute and adorable as Jeon Jungkook might be in front of the cameras, you have recently learned that he's just as sly and playful when he wants to be. 

"Will you stay still if I kiss you?" 

"Kiss me first and then you shall have your answer." 

So you do. 

Your soft lips are welcomed eagerly by his and they move against each other, tenderly without a hint of rush. Your breaths mingle and soft sighs escape as your hands get tangled in his hair. 

When you part, there's only a hair's gap between the two of you, "So what's the verdict?" 

Jungkook's doe eyes appear dazed as he looks at you. "Well my brain has turned into a mush, so you can totally expect me to stay still."

You giggle and the sound of it warms Jungkook's heart like nothing ever has. 

------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: i was so anxious about making this so long especially the Taehyung part but then the Taehyung part is something that happened to me irl, so i also just wanted it to be as real as possible. For Jimin, it just didn't feel right for the reader to agree to go out or be with Jimin without him earning it. But then, it also didn't quite fit in this reaction thing, if that makes sense? If y'all want some good ol' grovelling from this Jimin in a one-shot i will see what I can come up with 😉.

That being said, let me know what you thought of this! (This really was a lot of work, so your words would be greatest source of encouragement and achievement for me). Also, if you like my work and wish to have access to all my works before anyone else, here's my patreon!

Hope you enjoyed reading this!

#BTS FF #Bts au #BTS reactions #bts ot7 #Ot7 reactions #Maknae line #BTS angst #BTS fic #BTS unrequited au #Jimin angst #Jimin FF #Jimin au #Fuckboi Jimin #Jimin scenarios #Taehyung angst #Taehyung au #Taehyung scenarios #taehyung reaction #Jimin reaction #Jungkook au #Jungkook FF #Jungkook angst #Jungkook scenario #jungkook x reader #Jungkook reaction #Idol Jungkook #Jimin x Reader #Taehyung x reader

[swanlakebaby]

— dressing room quickie | pjm

prompt: hooking up in the dressing room.

⸝⸝ pairing: richbf!jimin x fem!reader

⸝⸝ warnings: smut, bf jimin, bf material, public sex, bj, creampie, swallowing, kissing, sub gf, dom jimin, quickie

⸝⸝ word count: 2.1k

⸝⸝ note: i didn't mean to be gone for almost a WEEK...i have too many story ideas planned out and couldn't figure out what to start with and ended up not writing at all. i'm trying to post stories every 2-3 days but clearly i'm inconsistent with that ;(

-- ALSO i've been thinking about wanting to start a series of some sort so if you have ideas please send them in the requests. i'll give credit to whoever i choose, dw! requests for other story prompts are open too. thanks for reading!

nsfw, 18+, minors dni

-

''which one?'' you ask , holding up two skirts in front of of your legs. jimin looks down and thinks for a moment. ''im not sure. you can get both.''

you glance at him. ''i know it's supposed to be a shopping spree but i don't want to get things i don't like just because i can.'' you look back in forth between the two skirts , feeling conflicted. ''i told you i'm paying , it doesn't matter. if it doesn't work out you can return it.''

''i want to be sure.'' you say softly. ''what color suits me? pink or white?'' you look up at him. ''you look good in anything.'' jimin wraps his arms around you. ''that's not a real answer. just help me please.'' jimin smiles and grabs your hand , walking to the back of the store. there , an employee stands , looking down at a table. she looks up at the couple as they approach her.

''hello , looking to try something on?'' she asks. you nod and lift up the two skirts. ''great , come with me.'' she walks down the hallway full of dressing rooms until she finds a vacant room. ''thank you.'' you say with a smile as you walk in. jimin shuts the door behind him as he walks in after you.

''um , excuse you.'' you say , furrowing your eyebrow at him. ''i've seen you naked before , go ahead.'' he sits down on the small bench and relaxes his muscles. ''what a pervert.'' you giggle as jimin reaches forward and playfully smacks your thigh.

you put down the skirts and begin to slip off your shoes and jeans. you grab the white skirt and begin sliding them on. ''what do you think?'' you do a little spin as you show off the skirt. ''mmm.'' jimin mumbles. ''turn again.''

you spin again , this time stepping closer to jimin. ''it looks great. put the other one on.'' he says. you do so, taking off the white skirt and putting it back on its hanger before grabbing the pink one. you put it on , this time standing in front of the mirror. ''i think this one is better.'' you say , analyzing yourself in the mirror. jimin slowly rises and stands behind you.

the warmth of his body heat made you nervous. you always suddenly felt self cautious anytime he was too close to you. ''so?'' you mumble anxiously. jimin places his hands on your sides , looking down at your neck. ''get it.'' he whispers. goosebumps trail down your back as he says this , almost making you shiver.

''weren't there others?'' you ask him. ''i think so. i'll be back.'' jimin steps back and exits the dressing room , heading back into the main part of the store. you take off the skirt and sit on the bench as you wait for jimin to get back.

a few minutes go by and you begin peeking your head out of the dressing room. you see jimin walking back towards you with four different skirts. ''really?'' you say sarcastically as jimin plops the skirts down onto the bench. he sits down beside them and hands you the first one. you take it and begin sliding them on. ''i don't like it.'' you say , tilting your head to the side in the mirror. ''i love florals but the fabric feels too harsh.''

jimin rubs his finger tips onto the fabric. ''i thought so too. next one.'' he grabs the next skirt and hands it to you. ''it's very summerish.'' you say , swinging side to side as the dress carelessly sways with your movements. ''i like it. it would be cute for a picnic date , don't you think?'' you smile down at him as you consider the idea. ''i think so. it looks pretty on you.''

time continues to go by as you try on these skirts. ''are we almost near the end?'' you say , growing impatient. ''yes hold on , here's the last one.'' jimin holds the skirt. you hold out your hand and wait for him to give it to you , but he doesn't. ''come here.'' he says. you step forward. jimin bends over a bit , holding the skirt open for your legs to go through. you hold onto his shoulders and slowly lift your legs one by one. jimin pulls the skirt up over you. ''i love it.'' he says.

''of course you do. it's short as hell.''

jimin giggles , rubbing your legs. ''it suits you.'' he says. ''i'm not so sure.'' you say in response. ''it's not like you have to wear it out anywhere.'' jimin whispers. ''then why would i get it?'' you cross your arms and shake your head , not quite understanding his logic. ''because i can just fuck you in it.'' jimin tugs at the skirt , looking for the price tag. ''really? be serious!'' you softly push him. ''i'm so serious.'' he stands up and looks down at you. you feel the energy in the room shift as jimin hovers above you. ''well-'' you begin feeling nervous all over again. you play with the ends of the skirt as you think of a response.

jimin smirks , knowing the affect he had on you was too much to hide. he holds your waist , running his hands over the soft velvet fabric of the skirt slowly. he bends his neck downward and gives you a small kiss. ''let's test it out.'' he says. your eyes go wide a tiny bit as the words slip out of his mouth. ''here?'' you whisper , listening to the sounds of others in their own dressing rooms as they shopped normally.

''i promise to be quiet if you will.'' jimin pulls you closer , beginning to gently rub your butt. the idea sounded tempting but you didn't wanna risk getting caught over jimin's horny shenanigans. ''i don't know..'' you say. ''let me change your mind then.'' jimin whispers as he steps back from you. he turns you around and pushes himself up against your back. you feel his bulge poke at you and swallow hard as you get increasingly more nervous to do what you're about to do.

jimin looks down as lifts up the skirt over your hips , grabbing onto your panties and roughly sliding them down. he pushes you forward against the wall. you hold onto it and stand still as jimin continues undressing you. he wraps his arms around your torso and begins to slowly unbutton your shirt. he looks into the mirror as he watches himself play with your breasts in a teasing manner.

he suddenly stops , freezing at the sound of people walking past the dressing room. once he feels the coast is clear he continues once again. he lowers his lips onto your shoulders , giving them soft kisses as he tightly clings onto the sides of your body. he moves slowly as he lets go and begins to unbutton his jeans. you turn your head and stare as he pulls out his cock.

still limp , you reach back and start rubbing on it , trying to get him hard as quickly as possible. you bring your hand to your mouth and spit , before reaching back and rubbing it over his cock. he softly groans as he becomes hard. you continue this motion for a few moments until eventually jimin becomes impatient and grabs onto your hair , pushing you forward against the wall and lifting your leg onto the dressing room bench.

you felt exposed as jimin bends down. he ducks under your thighs , lifting the one that rested on the bench. he puts his face forward , engulfing you. you shake as the feeling of his wet tongue touches the sensitive parts of your vagina. you cover your mouth , trying your best to not make noises. he continues eating you out , making soft groaning noises as he does so.

after only a few seconds of this , jimin stands back up. he wipes his mouth and slaps his dick against your butt. you whine , feeling super aroused and impatient now. you put your leg down and grab onto one side of jimin's pants. he holds his cock in one hand and uses the other to cling onto your wrist.

he slides into you , softly groaning. you turn to look at him. ''don't make noise.'' you whisper in a paranoid tone. he chuckles , not taking you seriously. he softly strokes in and out of you , quickly making you wet. he grips onto the sides of your hips and starts to go at a faster pace. soft wet sounds can be heard as jimin slams himself into you.

you push against his chest , making him stop. he slides out of you and sits on the bench. ''you're making too much noises.'' you say , sneaking a peek from under the door. ''i'm not.'' he whispers , running his hands through his hair and sitting up straight , lifting his cock. you turn your back facing him and slowly slide down on it. you sit still for a minute , adjusting to the feeling of his inches deep inside of you.

then , you begin to grind on him. jimin lays his head back onto the wall and closes his eyes with pleasure. ''you feel so good...'' he mumbles out. you smirk and continue grinding on him , quickly going faster. you place your hands on his knees and fuck yourself onto his cock , stiff inside of you. jimin grabs onto your hair and pulls it back as you bounce on him in a fast motion. he wraps it around his fist and tugs on it slightly , not pulling with full force.

the skirt slips over your butt as you continue riding him. jimin lets go of your hair and lifts up the fabric , staring down and watching as you throw yourself onto his cock.

you feel your knees weaken and let go of jimins knees. you bend forward , ready to cum. your pants become heavier and moan like as you finish onto him. at the same time , jimin stands and begins pounding you like crazy. you press up against the dressing room door. strings of your cum spilling out of you and sticking to your bodies. jimin lowly grunts , slamming into you as he creampies you. his chest moves up and down rapidly as he catches his breath.

you feel your insides becoming sticky and wet as you're now filled up with his cum. he slowly pulls out , watching as you stay bent over , allowing his cum to slowly slip out of you. you then fully stand , the fabric once again covering your butt. jimin grabs onto your neck and kisses it harshly , his eyes hazy from the satisfaction of cumming inside of you.

jimin pulls his pants back up and stuffs his cock back into his boxers. he adjusts his hair and looks in the mirror. his cheeks were a faint red color. he pressed down on them with his fingers , wanting it to go away.

he grabs onto the skirts you didn't want and grabs the handle of the dressing room door. you bend down quickly and grab onto his pants. you didn't feel finished just yet and still wanted to taste him. he notices this and smirks. ''we shouldn't risk it again.'' he says. ''i'm sure some people heard.''

you wait as he opens the door and leaves to return the clothing items to the employee. you stay down as you wait for him to come back. when he does , he giggles at you still being on your knees. you tug on his pants and pull them down , his still hard cock springing out. it was still wet with your cum , only turning you on even more.

jimin stands at the doorway , looking to both sides of the hallway. when he confirms that nobody is around , you shove his cock into your mouth. he skips a breath , placing a hand on your head. you suck him clean , licking off all of the cum on his dick. you were certain people could hear , but the paranoia of being caught quickly went as it came. jimin grabs onto your hair , starting to fuck your mouth. you look up at him with watery eyes as you let him.

he looks back down at you , his eyes half lidded. he suddenly stuffs his cock into your mouth , his body tensing up. you feel warm strings of cum trail down your throat as you swallow every last drop. jimin curses under his breath before making you stand back up , not wanting to continue any longer , knowing the chances of being caught were getting higher. ''put your clothes on.'' he whispers tiredly. you do so, taking off the skirt and putting your jeans and shoes back on.

you fix your hair up and grab your purse to re-apply your lipstick. he grabs the skirts and holds onto your hand as you exit the dressing room to go check out.

#bts fanfic #bts #bts x reader #bts fic #kpop #park jimin #bts jimin #jimin x reader #jiminie #bts smut #bts army #jimin bts #jimin #jimin smut #jimin ff #ff jimin #smut #bts ff #bts smuts #jimin smuts

[alessiamalfoyzabini]

Dark Moon | Chapter Thirteen

Pairing | yandere!Jimin x Reader

Word Count | 2,7k

Warnings | +18, angst, blood, risk of death, Jimin is absolutely beside himself, lots of tears and guilt, kissing and promises, mention of rape, mentions of kidnapping and past abuse, mention of murder, feeling of shame, Stockholm syndrome, yandere themes, triggering content

This fanfiction is yandere, if you don't like the genre, don't read and if you are not of age, don't read.

I don't want to hear any complaints in the comments, thank you.

This does not reflect my way of thinking or living at all, it is just a work of fiction, it is like watching a horror movie, many of us love horror movies, but we would never dream of what we see in those movies happening in reality as well.

Simply put, this story was written for entertainment purposes, it should not be seen as a reflection of my values, opinions or morals. I absolutely do not condone such acts.

⤷ Summary | She just wanted to escape her past, take charge of her life and break out of her steel cage, praying in God for a miracle that could change her life for good.

And her prayers were heard, but it was not the Divine that answered her.

That was certainly the devil in the guise of an angel, she thought as those corrupted and empty eyes searched her soul with extreme voracity.

He turned a sweet, false smile on her, before pushing her into the abyss.

➢ Author's Note | Hi, guys ❤️ This is one of the chapters I loved writing about Dark Moon, I hope you will like it too! Always let me know what you think, I love your comments ❤️

Taglist: @katherine-kookie, @dragons-flare, @m00njinnie, @seokjins-luigi, @pjmsneverland, @jimincrystal, @ajkwww, @ungodlyjoon, @hecateslittlewitchling, @namjoonsbuspass, @darkuni63, @xicanacorpse, @jiminismine4ever, @btssimpjaneth, @antisocial-mochi267, @reallygenerouskoala, @velvet-stardust2002

Taglist is open!

Chapter List - Previous - Next

Everything around him was smeared with blood and dirt, gunpowder shrouded that mansion in the open country that was teeming with Choi's men, but Jimin crushed their heads with ease, he would have eliminated them all, from first to last.

He struck the side of yet another idiot who thought he could confront him and ran toward the dungeon; Hoseok had told him that was most likely where they kept Y/N, because in checking the main rooms he had found no trace of the girl.

At his side Taehyung pinned a man by the arm and with a kick to the throat threw him lifelessly to the ground.

Even with confusion like the clash that was raging it was easy to find the room, although there were many only from one came the inhuman screams of a woman.

With icy chills on his neck he knocked down the door following a violent and desperate shove, freezing in front of that macabre sight.

Y/N was completely tied to a table with her legs shamefully spread wide open, her naked body was littered with bruises and cuts, and she was shaken by violent sobs, not to mention the blood, there was blood everywhere and the sight made Jimin lose all glimmer of reason. What the hell had they done to her?

He sprinted toward her, whose increasingly dull face was stained with terrible purplish marks and red splashes, "Y/N?!" was that his voice?

The voice so shrill and distraught, he himself did not recognize it as his own, Taehyung wordlessly observed the scene before him, he was breathless, Jimin cradled the girl's head in his arms, shaking her hair away from her face.

"Taehyung, help me!" he shouted in his direction, causing his friend to recoil, who retrieved his gun and fired accurately at each handcuff that held the young girl still bound, the skin around her wrists and ankles was now gone, the handcuffs had as if given her burns as a result of the excessive rubbing.

Jimin slowly took her in his arms, trying to figure out where the spillage of blood was coming from, and clutched the girl spasmodically to him, his face a pure picture of shock, he left her just long enough to take off his shirt and press it firmly against the girl's chest, there was only one hole, the bullet had passed through her chest and most likely got stuck inside her, he instead used his jacket to cover his nakedness, Y/N looked at him with wide, vacant eyes, as if she was no longer there but somehow still recognized Jimin's figure.

"Y/N, I'm sorry," he said between trembling lips, "I made you wait too long," he found himself crying, crying like a child at the miserable sight of that girl who had fought him so hard, lying in a sea of blood. She didn't even look like her anymore.

He had not protected her, he lacked air, he had not protected her.

"Jimin..." she gasped instead, reaching out a hand to the face of the man who had made her suffer so much, "Are you... fine," she sighed through the unbearable pangs of that torment. He was alive, he was well, and he was there, there with her.

Seeing him in that place, to save her, made her inexplicably emotional, even though that made no sense.

Jimin tenderly grasped her hand, kissing it and shaking his head, "Don't talk, don't waste your breath," he raised his face toward Taehyung who was looking at them with a bewildered and guilt-filled expression, "Go get help, Tae, please!"

The friend revived and nodded hastily and rushed out of the room, leaving them alone.

"You're here," sobbed the girl softly, sinking her head into the young man's bare chest, Jimin kissed her forehead trying to comfort her somehow, just imagining what had been done to her destroyed him.

"Of course I'm here, did you think I wouldn't come for you?" he asked in despair in the face of her physical and mental torment, he pressed harder on her now-primed shirt with vermilion liquid, hoping Taehyung would hurry up, "You're mine, Y/N, you mustn't forget that."

"But you hate me," was the only response he received, at which Jimin growled.

"I already told you I don't hate you!" he exclaimed bringing his lips closer to hers, "Would I hold you close to me like this if I hated you?"

Y/N slowly closed her eyes, her conscience screaming at her to stay awake, to listen to Jimin as her increasingly tired body demanded rest.

"Y/N!" he cried anxiously, pressing their lips together for a few seconds, it was a gentle touch as quick as a flap of wings, but it was enough to make her open her eyes again, "Stay with me, baby" he said in a sob.

"I've missed you" she whispered with little breath, it cost her effort in every sense to admit it aloud, but it was so, she must have been crazy for a long time now, but in Jimin's arms, she told herself, she could die with peace of mind.

"I've missed you," he repeated with a strange emotion in his eyes, he looked at her with such a gentleness that she had never noticed in her regard, it contrasted so much with those piercings that adorned his angular and massive body and gave him a dangerous air, "I won't let you go again, Y/N," he said quickly, the girl nodded slowly with a small smile, shortly afterwards her vision darkened.

Their story was strange, inconsistent. A lot had practically changed in just a year, who knew her tormentor would hold her like that? Who knew she would let him, surrendering to his grasp?

A bud had managed to bloom into a beautiful rose, nurtured by the sweet blood and bitter despair that cradled the existence of both of them.

Jimin counted every second that he spent in that house.

Y/N was almost always in bed, even two weeks after the shooting, at first he thought it had something to do with what Minho had done to her, but it wasn't just that, he knew it well.

He had promised not to let her go again, but instead he was a shadow of himself and did not dare to get too close to her. He was ashamed, not because of the desperate and frightened words he had whispered to her in that place, but because he had not been able to protect her, she had almost died and he could not find peace, he was always thinking "What if...?".

He hadn't gone to work anymore, he knew Seokjin would give him a hard time, but he couldn't do it. Every night with his heart in his throat he feared she might disappear again, that house didn't make him feel safe, not anymore.

He shrugged his shoulders closing his eyes bitterly, he had been wrong again.

Ever since he had met Y/N it seemed that the only certain thing he knew how to do was to be wrong again and again, never learning from his mistakes.

Then his ears picked up something, it was Y/N's faint voice calling him, and he jumped up from the sofa, running into her room.

"Did you call me?"

The girl was half stretched out on the bed, wearing a nightgown over the chest bandage she still had to keep for safety, she was so small and delicate that it seemed to Jimin that he was facing a tender fairy.

"I'd like to take a bath," she said shyly, avoiding his gaze.

"I don't think that's a good idea, the wound might leak more blood."

"Please... I feel dirty," she begged him with doe eyes, the man found himself sighing.

"Wait for me here."

The attitudes of both of them had changed, it was different from just tolerating each other, there was a gentleness never seen before in the way they both spoke to each other, it was pleasant and not only for Y/N, even Jimin wondered why he hadn't done it before.

He prepared her bath and then returned to her, took her effortlessly in his arms, and the young woman breathlessly admired the sensual features of his relaxed and masculine face, but adorned with wonderfully swollen lips, to be kissed countless times.

He helped her undress without taking his eyes off her body, but not out of lust.

He wanted to thoroughly scrutinize those marks that invaded her body disrespectfully over and over again, he fed on them to fuel the svisceral hatred he felt for Minho, they were still looking for him but soon they would unearth him, Jimin was sure of it.

When he accompanied her to the water the girl sighed contentedly, she made to loosen the bandages, but there too Jimin stepped in, gently removing everything and revealing the hole just above her right breast, he couldn't help himself, he reached out slightly to kiss gently that still young scar, lifted his eyes to her and found her staring at him with sympathetic blush on her cheeks.

Their new intimacy was strange; the abduction had changed something in their relationship.

He went back to soaping her body, occasionally leaving more kisses on her soft skin, kissed a spot just below her ear and slowly brushed his hand over her belly, the desire to make her feel good was there, pressing into his chest where his heart was pounding, but Y/N shivered and closed her legs instantly.

"I... sorry," she said squeezing her eyes shut to chase away the tears, but Jimin shook his head.

"Take it easy, I don't want to do anything," he tried to reassure her, going back to cleaning less intimate areas to let her know he meant what he said, that he didn't want to force her into anything, but Y/N swallowed a knot in her throat.

"No, you wanted me here to give you pleasure, I'm here for you, but I can't for the moment, not after that..." she froze trembling, remembering all too well Minho's painful and brutal thrusts, as well as Minhyun's thrashing as his boss panted on her like a pig, she covered her face in shame.

Jimin had also hurt her, but there was something different between him and Minho, she was more familiar with Jimin, she ventured to admit that ... somehow he had always attracted her?

She could not reflect objectively, but she was sure that for her Minho had simply been a horrifying and terrifying nightmare experienced with open eyes. Remembering the sadism with which he invited Minhyun to strike her and hurt her as he forced himself inside her would haunt her forever.

"There are so many reasons behind my decision to bring you here, Y/N, that was just one of many, but now it's different, you don't have to if you don't want to" the boy's sincere voice brought her back to the present, Jimin was really trying to make her understand, "And you don't know how much I regret what I did that last night, I was a monster" he said taking it out on himself and once again the girl found herself split in two.

"I... I thought you were, but after Choi Minho and his henchman...after they..." god, she couldn't even complete the sentence, "I understood who the demon was between you and him, believe me Jimin" she preferred to end the speech like that, clutching herself with embarrassment. She wasn't saying that Jimin hadn't done anything to her, but the thought that he was finally by her side calmed her down and she felt a pleasant warmth surface inside her, she was crazy and she was also accepting it.

The boy understood her shame and with a weary sigh began to lift up the light T-shirt he was wearing, the woman looked at him strangely and interestedly, his defined and luscious abs bewitched her, but Jimin pointed to the numerous piercings and dark ink lines on his arms.

"You don't have to feel ashamed of what happened to you, you were a victim, just like me."

Y/N widened her eyes in shock, what did he mean?

With indifference in his eyes, Jimin began to explain.

"In the past I met a young girl, it was night and she was coming back from an evening spent having fun with her friends, a drunk man had attacked her and I stepped in to save her.... I didn't know that my action would also doom me, I just wanted to do a good deed.... but she was part of the wealthy Choi family and was convinced that she could have it all, and by everything she meant me too, she was obsessed and I at the time was a kid committing a few petty thefts here and there, nothing too serious, but it was enough to be labeled as society's trash, no one would notice I was missing, and it was all too easy for her to convince her rich and powerful father to kidnap me and make me her prisoner," the boy's jaw tensed at those memories, "I was under that woman's power for four years, like a toy."

"Jimin, you don't have to do that," she pleaded in a broken voice.

"I don't want there to be any secrets between the two of us, Y/N," he smiled slightly, wiping away a tear from her eyes, "She used to keep me tied by one ankle at the foot of her bed, said I was her prince in a cage, at other times she would call me a dirty dog and I would pray that she would finally let me go free, but she would always burst out laughing... she didn't smoke, but she would always light a cigarette and put it out on me when she wanted to punish me or just vent about something, I was her outlet, I was instead taken to the dungeon when I behaved "badly," she would order her father's men to beat me and sometimes I wouldn't eat for days."

The girl gently brushed all those piercings, each of them hiding that kind of wound, Jimin closed his eyes under her gentle touch.

"Her cravings eventually matured and she forced me to have intercourses with her, but I never came, she blocked every sensation, she made me disgusted," he hissed, "I hated all Choi and all women looked like her to me."

He inhaled softly, wiping his sweaty forehead, something in those memories - his demons - made him react that way.

"Seokjin had some things to settle with Choi Senior and when he saw me, he asked for me as payment to settle what Choi still owed him, it was a lie, he saved me and then exterminated everyone in that house, seeing what he had managed to do only because he had wanted it that way, he convinced me to join his family, I began to have real sex with all the prostitutes who roamed the Dark Moon, the only difference being that I was the one with the upper hand now, I used them to unload my lust and I treated them badly because they reminded me of her all too well, that bitch, I could see it in their eyes the desire to use me to live a more comfortable life," he chuckled without amusement, "Then you came along and turned my world upside down, you unnerved me with your purity, you rejected me and I wanted you instead, it was frustrating, with you I wanted to do everything I had always recommended not to do with anyone and I hated myself."

"What do you mean?" she now stared at him with fascination, in front of her was a man who could finally understand her.

"Love you. I wanted, no… I want to love you."

"Jimin, I-"

"Don't answer me now," he shushed her by pressing his soft, irresistible lips to the girl's sweet ones, "Whether you love me back or not, just wait a little longer, even if it takes fifty years if necessary, just...don't ask me to give you freedom, I can't do that."

That was the love Park Jimin could and wanted to give her; passionate, tender ... possessive, selfish.

As she watched the boy leave the bathroom she found herself longing for that sick love, but one she absolutely needed to feel safe.

#yandere jimin x reader #bts yandere x reader #jimin fic #jimin fiction #jimin imagine #jimin ff #bts fanfic #bts #bts fanfiction #jimin smut #bts smut #yandere bts smut #bts yandere smut #yandere bts #yandere bts x reader #bts x you #jimin x you #bts dark fanfiction #bts smut yandere #bts yandere #bts x y/n #jimin x y/n #yandere jimin x y/n #seokjin fanfic #namjoon fanfic #yoongi fanfic #hoseok fanfic #taehyung fanfic #jimin fanfic #jungkook fanfic

[kinktae]

novocaine pt. 4 || (M)

↳ PART OF MY REWIND SERIES

Going home was hard – painful even. But falling back in love with Jimin, the boy you left behind? Downright gut-wrenching.

pairing: punk!jimin x reader

word count: 8.7k

genre: 1990s au, exes au, angst, smut

warnings: 90s slang, alcohol, fighting, car sex, oc has dead parents, bittersweet ending

A/N: PLS MAKE SURE REREAD 1-3, I KNOW ITS BEEN A FAT MINUTE BUT PLEASE CONSIDER ALL CHAPTERS WHEN READING THIS ENDING

01 | 02 | 03 | 04

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

PART FOUR (FINAL)

“You’re gonna break my damn neck!” Jimin complained, eyes shutting as you moved his head closer to the shower’s stream.

“Shh,” You giggled, fingers gingerly rinsing your boyfriend’s head. 

Jimin was fully clothed, head thrown over the tub’s edge, insisting that he remain dry as you washed the orange dye from his hair.

Just the other day you had MTV playing in the background as Grams and you were making cookies when the video for The Flaming Lips’ She Don’t Use Jelly came on. You hadn’t heard the song in ages; Hoseok used to belt the nonsensical lyrics religiously on early morning bus rides to high school. But more importantly, you had never seen the music video and became consumed by the lead singer’s tangerine-colored hair. 

It quickly became a topic of conversation between you and Jimin, nudging a shoulder into his side anytime you’d pass by an orange car or a shelf of hair dye. A week of your less-than-subtle teasing had gone by when he finally begrudgingly agreed to dye his hair orange. You were beyond excited, even if he had only agreed to get you to finally shut up.

So here the two of you were, kneeled on the tile floor of your bathroom, random splotches of bleach and dye on your shirts, the sound of The Smashing Pumpkin’s latest CD coming from your room.

“You should be grateful you have a girlfriend that’s willing to dye your hair for free.”

“Is that what you’re doing? I thought you were trying to drown me.”

“Alright, you big baby,” You rolled your eyes, reaching over him to turn off the shower head. “I’m done.”

“Pass me a towel, please?” 

His eyes were scrunched shut, hand flailing about for the towel rack aimlessly. Chuckling, you passed the wet-haired boy a towel, sitting back on your heels as you watched him pat his face dry.

“Here, let me get your hair.” You offered, grabbing the towel back from his face and onto his head, careful to be gentle as you had bleached it earlier today.

Jimin sat obediently, quietly admiring the way you took your time and cleaned the dye-stained skin around his hairline. He loved having your attention; you were always so gentle with him. His chest tightened as you hummed along to the song in the background, oblivious to the splashes of orange dye that had found your cheek.

“Oh my god. It’s hella orange.” You giggled. 

Jimin pulled you onto his lap, partly to help you work more comfortably, mainly because he liked having you close.

“Does it look bad?” His warm eyes peered into yours, sounding somewhat unsure. 

Brows furrowing, you paused to press a kiss on Jimin’s pouting mouth. As if there were any universe in which Jimin looked bad. Seeing as his frown ceased to let up, you kissed him once more, “You look great, Minnie. My little pumpkin.”

“Real convincing.” He glared. Stealing one more kiss from you, he helped you off him and back up off the bathroom floor.

You watched intently as he moved towards the bathroom mirror. You weren’t anticipating him to hate it, but should the situation present itself, you had made a point to buy an emergency bottle of black hair dye, ready to remedy the situation at a moment’s notice. 

Jimin said nothing at first, merely tilting his head from side to side as he ran his hands threw his newly orange, somewhat damp hair. A smile broke across his handsome face.

“It’s actually pretty sick.” He grinned, clearly pleased with the final result. You let out a breath of relief.

“I told you! Admit it, I was right, you look fucking hot. No one ever trusts my artistic vision.” You sighed dramatically, earning you a chuckle.

“Alright, Picasso. Remind me again the plan for tonight?” He rolled his eyes, reaching for the hairbrush he had laid out on the sink counter earlier.

“Well,” You watched as he sorted through his hair, “Hobi left a message saying he scored all of us tickets tonight for the drive-in theater but failed to mention what time or what movie it was.”

Jimin chuckled, “Typical. And you tried calling Hobi’s line?”

“No one picks up. I went and knocked on his door before you came over. The Jungs are out of town so he’s probably kicking it at Gwen’s.” You shrugged.

While you could in theory go and look up Gwen’s landline in the phone book, it seemed like a tremendous amount of work just to locate someone who quite literally lived right next door. He’d show up eventually. He always did.

You sighed, “Man, I can’t believe that old drive-in is still kicking. I thought for sure it went under in the time I left town.”

Jimin nodded, “Nah, it’s still around. But the only people using it are the old folks who were around when it was first built. They’re still playing the same ten shitty movies on repeat.”

“Let’s just get ready and go hunt him down in an hour, yeah?”

And so the two of you spent the next hour readying yourself, Jimin styling his new hair and you waging war against the blue eyeliner Gwen had somehow convinced you to purchase.

It was just around the one-hour mark that you received a call from the very person you had been hoping to find.

“Yo, kid! Come on out, I got two tickets with your name on them!”

Jimin and you ran out onto your grandmother’s driveway eagerly, laughing as Hobi slammed on his car horn melodically, a bright smile written across his face.

“Great timing, we were just about to go break down your door.” You smiled, grabbing the two bright yellow admission tickets that Hoseok had dangling out his car window. “Thanks, Hobi.”

“Where’ve you been, man?” Jimin questioned his best friend.

“Why? You keeping tabs on me, Carrot Top?” Hoseok giggled, eyeing your boyfriend’s new hair. 

“Funny.”

“I’m playin’, it looks fresh, dude. I dig.” Hoseok assured, holding his hands up as if to show he meant no harm.

You rolled your eyes, “Lemme guess, you were at Gwen’s.”

“You kidding? Her place? Her dad’s sheriff— hell no!” Hobi shook his head before a greasy grin took hold of him. “Besides, I’ve got the open crib, a pretty girlfriend, and stamina like a racehorse.” 

Jimin’s giggle was instantaneous, immediately clueing you in on what exactly Hobi was implying.

“You pig. I rang you and knocked on your door!” You scrunched your nose at him.

“Like a racehorse, kid,” Hobi emphasized, only furthering your frown.

“Jeez, okay, got it… TMI.”

“So we ready to watch Jurassic Park or what?” Hoseok first pumped the air.

Jimin’s eyes went wide, “They’re playing Jurassic Park tonight?! Sweet!”

You too were shocked. The film had come out only a few years ago.

“How the hell did that lame-ass drive-in get the license for a film that recent?”

“Got the old lady to pull some strings.” Hobi flashed you both a smug look, reaching over to pop his collar out theatrically.

“So your mom gave you the tickets? Councilwoman Jung sure has pull in this town.”

You were thoroughly impressed. Hoseok struck out in the parents department. Not only did they tolerate his tomfoolery throughout his teen years, but as his mother was on the city council, they were often occupied with work, giving Hobi free reign to do as he pleased as long as he remained out of jail. 

His mother’s words, not yours.

“Oh Nah, I got the tickets myself.” Hobi corrected.

You squinted at him, suspicious, “…Should I even ask how you got these tickets?” 

“Depends,” His voice lowered suddenly, eyes flickering from side to side, “are you gonna snitch?”

“No?”

“I broke into the ticket booth last night and just grabbed a bunch of tickets from the drawer.” He shrugged.

Your jaw fell, “Hobi!”

“Dude!” Jimin burst out laughing. 

“What?!” Hoseok’s eyes went wide, as if entirely innocent of any crime. “Why are we wigging out? It’s not like I stole money from the register! Besides, is it my fault that so many places here are easy to break and enter?”

“Tell that to Gwen’s dad when he finally locks your ass up.” Jimin teased. Your childhood friend tutted, shifting his car into reverse.

“Whatever. You still took the tickets, ungrateful bastards. Your hands aren’t clean either. The movie is in twenty minutes. I dropped Gwen off at hers so she could go get changed so I gotta bounce and pick her back up. You guys need a ride?” 

“Nah, we’ll take my car,” Jimin assured him.

Hoseok began to pull out the driveway, window still rolled down. “Meet up at mine after for drinks?”

“Sure. Thanks, Hobi!”

“See ya later, man!”

The three friends waved goodbye to one another as the eldest pulled out onto the street and drove off.

“Do you really think he and Gwen were busy fucking all this time?” Jimin pondered the second Hoseok was out of earshot, making you scowl.

“I think that Hobi is like a brother to me and if I think about it too much I’ll actually barf.” 

Jimin chuckled, throwing an arm over your shoulder as the two of you made your way to his car.

———

“A medium popcorn, one Junior Mints, and Buncha Crunch please.” You smiled at the concession’s attendee.

You were about 20 minutes into Jurassic Park and could make out the sound of the film as you ordered Jimin and yourself some snacks. He had offered to go make the snack run himself, of course, but seeing as it was his favorite movie playing, you decided that the sacrifice would be yours to make.

Handing over the necessary cash, you moved to the side, watching patiently as the attendant assembled your order. Just then, someone else approached the concession counter. You glanced over at the person not particularly interested, before realizing at once just who the next patron was.

“Yoongi?” You called out before you could stop yourself.

A head of faded mint hair turned towards you, his dark eyes meeting yours, and took on an expression that you could only guess mirrored your own. The kind of expression that can only be shared between two people who had their tongues down each other’s throats not too long ago.

A pregnant pause fell between you. 

“Y/N. Hey.” He breathed after a beat.

Chewing on the inside of your lip, you contemplated your next words, wondering what exactly to say to your boyfriend’s ex. You know… the one you had tried to have sex with.

Thankfully, the arrival of your popcorn and other snacks made it so you didn’t have to respond, a flustered ‘thank you’ escaping your lips as you grabbed your order.

“Uh, two medium sprites,” Yoongi told the attendant once she moved to take his order. You tried your best to look occupied, not wanting to look like you were waiting on the mint-haired boy even though you most definitely were.

Within a minute, he moved towards you, drinks in either hand and a sheepish smile on his face.

“So, uh… this is awkward.” He admitted honestly, joining you as began to walk away from the concession stand, deciding the spare the innocent concession girl from the unfortunate conversation that was about to unfold.

“Super awkward.” You affirmed with a nervous chuckle, hands gripping around your bucket of popcorn.

He nodded.

“Hey, so,” He came to a stop suddenly, halting your stride. “I’m sorry if I caused problems for you the other night. I wouldn’t have… I mean, I didn’t know that you were… We were also both probably way too drunk–”

“No, no, honestly, don’t sweat it!” You were quick to cut him off, not wanting him to assume that he had done anything to make you uncomfortable that night. “I didn’t know who you were either. You seemed cool and hot and, you know… I wanted to. So… yeah. ”

Wow. This just nearly beat the moment Jimin walked in on you two in the scale of awkwardness. At least you weren’t sober then.

Yoongi nodded once more, “Cool. I also wanted to. But, um… listen, you’re a cool chick and all but you should know there’s someone else. Plus, there’s the whole you being my ex’s ex thing…”

Oh god. Was Yoongi… rejecting you? Fuck, he totally thought you were still coming onto him. How utterly humiliating. 

“Yeah, no, gotcha. That can literally never happen again. It’s all good.” You laughed, purely because of how ridiculous this entire conversation was. He grinned back at you, remembering exactly why he liked you in the first place that night at Guyi’s.

“No hard feelings?” He offered you a crooked smile.

“Deal.” You mused, eyes falling on the two drinks in his hand. “So are you here alone?”

You watched in interest as Yoongi suddenly turned a shade of pink.

“No, actually… I’m here with a coworker.” He told you, a certain bashfulness to his tone.

“Oh, a coworker.” A knowing smirk grew.

“I’m kind of seeing him, I guess. I don’t know, it’s too soon for labels.” He shrugged.

“So you’re seeing your coworker. Scandalous.” You teased.

“Again, sorry. If you were literally anyone but Jimin’s ex-girlfriend–“

“Oh, shut up.” You rolled your eyes at his joke, making him laugh.

The sound of various screams rolled over the area, catching both of your attentions, undoubtedly belonging to the moviegoers in response to a scary scene that must’ve just played out.

“I’m not really into dinosaurs,” Yoongi admitted lightheartedly to which you giggled, agreeing.

“Where do you work by the way?” You made casual conversation. “I just realized I never asked.”

“I work at a daycare.” He told you, making your smile drop.

Right. The daycare. 

You supposed that was the thing about ghosts. They tended to haunt you.

Your chest felt hollow once more as he took a sip from one of the drinks. “Not huge on snot and boogers but the pay is decent so who cares, right?”

“Whatever happened between you and Jimin? I mean, why did you guys break up?” You said suddenly. 

It had just made its way out like word vomit, desperate to change the conversation. The last thing you wanted was for him to ask if you were at all familiar with the property.

Yoongi looked at you in surprise for a split second before shaking his head.

“Jeez, how ironic.” He said, mostly to himself.

“Huh?”

“No, nothing I just… it’s funny you asked me that. Because it was you. You were the reason we broke up.” He confessed, bringing the straw of his drink back up to his mouth.

Weirdly, a feeling of guilt washed over you at his words. It rendered you silent.

“At the time it pissed me the hell off. He was dumping me for an ex-girlfriend he hadn’t seen in what? Four years? Took a hit to my ego for sure.”

All you could do was stand there looking dumb. You hadn’t the slightest idea how to react to what he was saying. Part of you was… delighted? Happy that Jimin wasn’t as dedicated to that relationship as you feared he might’ve been. But another part, a much more prominent part, felt awful. Terrible that you had hurt Jimin so deeply that he couldn’t even commit himself to another person. That he couldn’t move on.

“But anyway, it was for the best. Weirdly he did me a favor. No point in being hung up on a guy who was still hung up on the past.” Yoongi paused suddenly, scrunching his nose as he shook out his mint locks. “Dammit, I sound like such a cliche bitter ex, huh?”

“At least you’re not the shitty ex who broke his heart.” You offered half-heartedly.

Yoongi stared at you for a moment, allowing himself to freely admire the girl who had captured Jimin’s heart all those years ago. Despite your otherwise neutral expression, there was a gloom around you that he couldn’t quite ignore. 

He pressed his lips together, wondering if he could offer you any solace.

“If it makes you feel any better, there’s no guarantee it would’ve worked out even if you had stayed.”

Your head tilted in confusion. Yoongi stole a piece of popcorn cheekily, popping a piece into your mouth.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, you told me yourself that night. You’re a city girl. You would’ve wanted to go see the world eventually and everyone knows Jimin has no plans to ever leave this tiny ass town. Maybe you just got the inevitable over with. So don’t beat yourself up over it.”

You were suddenly acutely aware that Yoongi had no idea that you and Jimin were back together. A wave of nausea rolled over you as you considered his words.

He was right, of course. You had always dreamed of making it out of here. Even when you were young and running down the halls of your grandmother’s house, your adventures took you far away, towards weather unlike your own, towards faces and cities you’d never recognize. 

So what was it that you were doing now? Getting closure by opening up a chapter with Jimin you had closed years ago?

Jimin was the boy who had his kids' names picked out when he was in elementary school. He was the boy whose biggest dream was remodeling his parents' home so that it would one day fit his own family, the family that he wanted to start here. He was the boy who looked for you months after you went missing, and who ended a relationship because he was unable to let go of the past. He put his life on hold for you. And who was to say he wouldn’t do it again when you left?

Your feet felt heavy as if you were sinking into the dirt of the drive-in lot, crushing guilt piling onto you.

“Hey.” A voice called out, making both Yoongi and you turn to face whoever was trying to grab your attention.

It was Jimin. Of course, it was. You had gotten caught up in conversation, taking far too long to get snacks. It was only a matter of time that Jimin would head over to check in on you. His hands were tucked away in his jeans, expression unreadable as he eyed the two of you from where he stood.

“Oh. Hey.” Yoongi replied, eyebrows pulling up in surprise. His surprise was quickly replaced with confusion as Jimin walked over, pressing a kiss to your cheek as he took the snacks from you, always the gentleman.

“Sorry, I took so long. We bumped into each other and lost track of the time.” You explained awkwardly to your boyfriend through warm cheeks.

“I see that.”

You could see the way Jimin’s jaw was tense as if swallowing back words that weren’t exactly pleasant. You almost see the puzzle piece coming together in Yoongi’s mind as he looked at the two of you interact.

“Well… it was nice seeing you again. Good luck with everything.” You waved Yoongi goodbye, already heading back where Jimin had set up the car, eager to walk far from the second most awkward situation the three of you had found yourselves.

“You too.” You heard Yoongi called back, a note of disbelief in his tone, one that you forced yourself not to dissect further.

———————

You did your best to keep your eyes on the screen ahead of you, but the tension in the car was palpable. Jimin was taking those sharp short breaths through his nose like he always did when he was angry. You licked your dry lips.

“You’re upset.” You broke the ice.

“No, I’m not.”

You tilted your head against the car seat’s headrest, facing your troubled lover.

“Yes, you are.” Your tone took a soft timbre. “You’re doing that angry sulky thing you do.”

“I don’t sulk,” Jimin said, bottom lip jutting out ever so slightly.

“Minnie, you sulk.” You chuckled but failed to receive a chuckle back in return from him.

You straightened up in your seat.

“Nothing is going on between Yoongi and I.”

“I know.” He said.

Your brows furrowed at his words, “Okay. Then is it something else?”

Jimin said nothing, eyes pressed against the movie screen but clearly not paying attention to the film at all. You sighed.

“Can you roll your window up?” You asked. Your boyfriend met your eyes curiously, seeing that you had done so on your side before complying and rolling his up.

The second his window was up, you were unbuckling your seat belt and maneuvering yourself across the car and onto his lap.

Pressing kisses onto his neck, you felt as he noticeably relaxed, a soft sigh falling from his pillowy lips.

“Talk to me.” Your mouth traveled onto his jaw, kisses sweet and reassuring.

“I love you.” Was his breathy response, hands gripping to sides of your thighs, pulling you closer to him.

He couldn’t say how insecure seeing Yoongi made him feel. He didn't know how to say that if you left him once, what was to stop you from leaving him again? If he wasn’t good enough to make you stay all those years ago, what would be different this time?

“I love you too, Minnie.”

His hand found the side of your cheek, drawing your mouth into his, kissing you with intention. 

You pulled back suddenly, “Wait, this isn’t talking.”

“Don’t wanna talk. Just wanna touch you.” His voice was lower than usual.

Your face flushed at his honesty, unsure of whether to press further. Ultimately you gave in.

“Okay.” 

Your fingers curled into his t-shirt, tongue finding his, heavy breaths filling the small space of the car as you lost yourselves in each other.

Breaking the kiss with a groan, you pulled up at your shirt. You nearly laughed at the way Jimin had already begun to tug at your bra clasp before you had even successfully removed the garment from you. 

The lacy bra fell down your body, tossed aside mindlessly as he pressed a kiss onto your chest, hand working your soft flesh. You let out a breath as he sucked the supple flesh into his mouth, thumb rolling over your pert buds.

“Wait, drop your seat back, I don’t want someone from another car seeing.”

Jimin nodded, leaving your chest to comply with your request. Immediately though, his hand found the back of your neck, pulling you towards him and into a kiss.

Making out in Jimin’s car was admittedly nostalgic — the two of you having spent many afternoons fooling around whenever you got the chance. And maybe that's what the two of you were going for, slipping back into each other in a way that came naturally.

You rolled your hips into his desperately, every inch of you buzzing at the way you could feel the way he had hardened underneath you.

“You’re so fucking beautiful.” He muttered as his thumb lolled over your sensitive nipple. You whimpered.

The sound took him back to the night of the bonfire when he had buried his head between your angelic thighs that night of the bonfire, your greedy fingers tugging at his scalp as you cried against the feeling of his tongue.

Fuck, he was hard.

His hand reached down to undo his jeans in desperation, the pressure of his strained cock in his thigh jeans too much to bare. His actions caught your attention, your teeth finding your bottom lip as you watched the anguished boy reach into his underwear and readjust himself. 

Suddenly, his mouth was on yours again, hand angling one of your thighs so that he could grind his hips against it. 

You were getting far more worked up than you anticipated, his hot mouth leaving marks across your exposed skin. You needed more of him.

“Do you wanna fuck me?” You asked innocently, hand pressed against his abdomen.

“Fuck yes.”

“Hm...”

Your hand dipped into his underwear, eyes glimmering in mischief as you pulled his cock out, wasting no time in working the shaft. 

“Fuuuuuck.” Jimin’s voice was drawn out and pleading, chest rising and falling in rhythm to the pace your hand had set around his cock.

“Does it feel good, Minnie?” You cooed teasingly, sucking a bruise into his pretty neck.

You preened as his hips suddenly jerked up, a whine pushing past his swollen lips before he cleared his throat.

“You’re gonna fucking kill me. Sit on my cock already.” He begged.

You smiled into his skin, head moving back up to kiss him as you ran your thumb over his red tip, swallowing his moan.

“You feel so good in my hand though.”

You weren’t lying. Hot, engorged, and pulsing under your fingers, his cock was truly a fine piece of craftsmanship. If it weren’t for the cramped location that was the front seat of his car, you would’ve had your lips wrapped around him, using your tongue to remind yourself of every vein and ridge.

“I promise I’ll feel even better inside you.” He groaned.

“What’s the rush? I don’t remember you ever turning down a handjob.”

“And I don’t remember you being such a fucking tease. Clearly, things change.” He tutted.

You frowned at his tone but allowed one of Jimin’s hands to push its way between your legs and down your underwear.

You stifled a noise as he ran his fingers up and down your slit.

“Oh, love bug, you’re so wet. That for me?”

You fought back a blush, somehow still flustered at the way Jimin’s dirty talk after all these years.

“You got yourself this worked up over touching me, yeah? Fuck.”

A shutter ran through your body, pleasure running over you as he toyed with your clit. Your hand fell from his member altogether, finding leverage against his thigh as you pushed yourself closer to his feathery touches.

Your hips moved on their own accord, mouth opening as a silent moan tumbled out.

“Bet that feels so good, huh? So cute.” He praised, pinching one of your cheeks.

“Now whose teasing?” You pouted. 

A whimper escaped you against your better judgment as his fingers suddenly made their way down, spreading you open as he lightly pressed against your entrance.

“Acting so tough but losing the act as soon as I touch you.” He placed a kiss against your head, spurred on by the way you had suddenly become pliant and placid under his touch. “You're practically sucking my fingers in.”

You weren’t certain if the whine that greeted him in response was from his words or the way he pulled his hand back every time you tried to sink onto his fingers.

“Please.”

“Sorry, angel. I’m not gonna finger fuck you. Just gonna sit here and play with what’s mine.”

Jimin was not usually particularly possessive but god was it hot.

If his fingers hadn’t immediately moved back to roll over your clit, you might have had the energy in you to complain, but instead, you found yourself plaint in his arm, thighs trembling.

“I’ll... shit... I’ll cum if you keep that up.”

“Bummer. Guess there won’t be any need to fuck you then.”

“Dammit! Just fuck me, Minnie!”

“Hm... I dunno, I think I’m going to need a little bit more convincing before I do–“

“Oh, please, please!” You were rambling before he could finish his sentence. “Fill me up, Minnie. I need it so badly. I can take it I promise.”

“H-Holy fuck, okay. Dirty fucking mouth. Come here, baby.”

And just like that, you pushed yourself back up onto your knees, moving to hover over Jimin’s painfully erect cock. 

Your boyfriend’s hands cradled your hips as you aligned the two of you, kneading the soft flesh tenderly.

“I love you.” You promised as you sank down. He threw his head back as you fell into the rhythm that felt as natural as breathing with him.

“Damn right you do, you're my fucking girl. Mine.”

He loved the way you moved with him - loved the way you felt like the piece he was missing. He loved everything about you and couldn’t help but shower you with praise as you rode his cock, wishing he could give you more than just car sex. He felt helpless near you, nowhere near as confident as he came across. You were spectacular in every single way, smiling as you leaned over to kiss him.

——

“Tell me about New York City,” Jimin ran his fingers down your arm.

The two of you had long forgotten about Jurassic Park, now reclothed and cuddled up in the back of his car.

You raised an eyebrow, “Honesty? It’s loud and dirty. Not to mention traffic is shit.”

“That sounds… terrible?”

“It is,” You breathed, “But it’s not. It’s the perfect place to disappear. No one gives you a shit about what you’ve got going on, no matter how fucked up you feel. Everyone is just trying to deal with their own chaos and get through the day.”

“Sounds kind of lonely.” He muttered. You hummed in contemplation, wondering how it was that you felt just the opposite. It was weirdly comforting to know that no matter your story, those in the city had seen worse.

“Did you know that when you’re deep in the city, there isn’t a single star in the night sky. Not a single one.” You recounted.

Jimin tilted his head, “What do you mean there are no stars?”

“It’s like they’ve all gone missing and the sky is just this massive empty black hole.”

“How can there be no stars? Where do they go?” He laughed.

“My theory? The city needs so much power to run that they had to steal every star from the sky above them… Though I’m told it’s something called light pollution that just covers the stars.”

“I like your theory better.” He smiled.

You turned towards the massive screen, watching as dinosaurs wreaked havoc.

“There’s a complex above the bar I used to work at. They have a rooftop that you’re not technically supposed to access but everyone does anyway. At night you have the most perfect view of the city skyline. The sky is just this hazy gray color but the further out you look, the lights from the surrounding buildings start to look like little stars sprinkled on the ground. I’ve always thought of it as New York’s version of the night sky. Like looking at the world upside down. It’s just… spectacular.” You marveled.

You could still see it so vividly in your mind, how the empty sky glowed and the buildings twinkled.

“You’ve always had stars in your eyes,” Jimin said suddenly, eyes fixated on you. You turned to meet his gaze.

“Hm?”

There was an uncharacteristically serious expression on his face, “Do you remember the first night we met?”

You blinked, taken aback by his abrupt question.

“Hoseok introduced us. Second year of high school. Homeroom.”

Jimin shook his head.

“Do you remember the last home football game of our freshman year?”

Freshman year? Football game? Yeah, you remembered that.

“I mean, yeah. That was before I decided I hated school functions and only wanted to hang out with social rejects and lowlives. First and only high school football game I attended. Why?” You pondered.

“You and Hoseok were standing on the top of the bleachers. I think the two of you were trying to figure out how to climb the announcer building without dying or getting caught.” Jimin went on to recount.

“Oh, snap! I remember that! We did it, too. I remember it took me ages to convince Guyi to come climb up. Hoseok got a bunch of kids to come and join us… You were there?”

Jimin nodded at you, also remembering the way you and the thick-framed girl were close back then.

Jimin actually remembered much more than that. He recalled almost vividly how he and a few friends were called to follow the rowdy boy he knew from history class and how he led them through the bleachers and toward side the side of a building. There were two girls sitting on top already, the louder of the two turned around and waved at the newcomers, before turning back towards the sky, legs stretched out in front of her as she chatted with her best friend.

The other girl you were with, which he would later learn was Guyi, was sitting away from the edge, arms wrapped tightly around herself as she shivered at the night’s chill. She looked uncomfortable and he could hear her muttering about wanting to go back down but you insisted that the view of the stars was better where up here, leaning back on your palms as you faced the night sky.

He was taken by you immediately and spent the rest of the time on the roof glancing your way in hopes even just a quick peek of how the twinkling lights reflected off your irises.

You were all he could think about, even as the principal came screaming at you guys to come down. He thought of you as his older brother Jihoon drove him back home, silent in his seat as he stared up at the very same sky that captured your attention. He thought of you throughout that following summer and the very first day of your sophomore year, when he finally worked up the courage to tell Hoseok how he felt, leading the more extroverted boy to introduce the two of you.

And he had loved you ever since. Even now he loved you, eight years later, sat on Hoseok’s couch as you and the people you grew up with all played a drinking game, the movie since wrapped up, and the function heading back to Hoseok’s place.

He watched as you smiled and laughed with the others and imagined a world in which this could become your guys' new normal. Where every day could be just like how things were and he could just love you as easily as breathing.

But real life was never as easy as fantasies. Real-life consisted of messes and trauma and hurt feelings; there was no glossing over the past four years. And the more Jimin drank from his cup, the harder it was to keep up this game of pretend the two of you agreed on. One day you would have enough and you would leave him again. 

He knew this was temporary - he agreed to it after all. He had kept you in this town despite how much he knew it hurt you to be here. Truthfully, as he sat on the couch getting far more inebriated than he should’ve, Jimin was angry. Perhaps with himself, perhaps with the world, perhaps with both — it didn’t matter in the end. 

Because every day with you meant waiting for the day you would leave and what was he to do but keep on loving you?

He felt helpless.

“Where did you go?” Were his words as you sank back next to him on the couch, having been eliminated from the game taking place at the coffee table. Hoseok, Gwen, and a few other familiar faces were still sitting around it, laughing and joking with one another drunkenly.

“Huh? What do you mean? I was sitting right there.” You giggled, glancing down at the cup of liquor that Jimin had in his hand. “Don’t tell me you’re still a lightweight, Minnie?”

He was boiling, and the words were spilling up and over faster than he could make sense of.

“Where were you, Y/N? I tried to find you I– You left me.”

Something was wrong. You could hear it in his words, and see it in the way his glossy eyes threatened to spill over. He brought his cup back up to his mouth, taking a large sip. You took it from him the second you realized just how drunk he was.

“Hey, that’s enough… let’s go outside, okay? Get some air.” You were up on your feet in an instant, eyes flickering over to the group to see if anyone had heard.

“You left me,” Jimin repeated.

“Jimin. Please.” There was a desperate look in your eyes, clearly not wanting to have this conversation with other people present.

Blinking away the lump in his throat, he got up from the couch and followed you out of the room, slipping through the sliding glass door onto the patio.

The patio door shut with a quiet click, the chill of the cold night greeting you both.

“How did you just... pack your bags and leave it all behind? Leave us behind? I thought you loved me.” Jimin wiped away at his cheeks blindly, unsure of when he started crying. 

“I did— Minnie, I do.” You tried your best to keep your voice level, growing emotional at the topic at hand and at the man you loved hurting.

“Was I not enough of a reason to stay?”

Your mouth opened and closed repeatedly as you struggled to answer him. You, just like him, were intoxicated and nowhere in the right state of mind to be having this conversation.

“I mean, fuck, love bug! You just left!” His voice pitched up in disbelief, clearly not aware of his volume raising as well. 

You were trembling. Though from the cold or the guilt you weren’t sure.

“I-I know, I-”

“You just left and never came back? This is your home–”

“Don’t fucking say that!” You snapped, surprising both you and Jimin.

A tsunami of emotion crashed into you.

“My parents are dead, Jimin. And I know you get it, I know you lost your brother but… Minnie, I couldn’t breathe! I-I felt trapped, and… god, after they died— it was me who was dying. Yes, I was wrong to leave but I was young and hurting and.. I just couldn’t let this town kill me too.”

Your hands found your face, covering it as a wave of melancholy rushed over you. 

“I was supposed to be in that fire. I ran off to Grams because of a stupid, meaningless fight with my mom. After they died, I spent an entire year wondering if I shouldn’t have just died right there with them.”

You couldn’t bear to look up at Jimin. You couldn’t bear to see the pity in his eyes as you laid out the worst of you for him to hear.

“The second I stepped out of this town was the first real breath of air I had taken since they died. I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing with my life but I know that this town stopped being my home the second they died.”

Any and all anger had melted away from the orange-haired man.

“Y/N–”

You looked up suddenly, frown furrowed and eyes blurry with tears.

“I don’t need forever. I just need right now, okay, that’s what you said to me the night of the bonfire. You said that, remember?”

“I remember.” He sounded sorrowful.

“I love you, Minnie. I never stopped loving you. But they’re gone.” You mourned, breaths uneven. “And they’re everywhere I look in this town. I mean… why can I come back but they can’t? How is that fucking fair?!”

You were nearly inconsolable, watery eyes barely widening as your face was suddenly taken into Jimin’s hands, his thumbs brushing past your wet cheeks.

“I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. You’re right. I’ve already asked so much of you. This town has taken too much.” His eyes searched yours. “I... I wish you would’ve told me. When they died… for a year you said nothing. I thought you needed your space so I gave it to you, but I never would have if I knew you were planning to leave. What if I could’ve helped? You helped me when we lost Jihoon, remember?”

“I know...” Your answer was lackluster. Because you didn’t have an answer for him. You didn’t know why you pushed away those who loved you when your parents first died.

Was it teenage naivety? Was it fear of losing anyone else? 

You wished you could give the sweet boy a solid answer. But you weren’t even sure that sober you could. God, he deserved so much more than you had given him.

“It was you and me against the world, remember? Through all the shit and garbage life throws at us. You were my person. You still are.”

“I just… there is so much out there, Jimin. So much this small town can never offer. If you only saw the cities, the kinds of people that come in and out.” You emphasized, suddenly inspired.

“What if… what if you come with me.” Your voice was small, knowing the impossibility of what you were asking him.

His eyes told you the answer to your question he even spoke.

“Bug, I… My family needs me here. Everything is here… I don’t know if I can just leave. This… this is my home.” His brows fell, rubbing your cheek apologetically.

“I know. But I can’t let you put your life on hold for me. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I strung you along for another four years. When I leave I don’t want you holding onto me. You deserve to move on and find a life here like you’ve always wanted.”

“The life here that I always wanted was with you.” Jimin cried, pulling you into him. 

You buried your face into his neck and for a moment the two of you just held each other and cried.

“I’m sorry.” You said, knowing that neither of you could do this anymore.

“I’m sorry, too.” He held you tighter.

The game of pretend had drawn to a close and neither of you had won.

—

Your grandmother was awake and doing a crossword in the kitchen when you walked back home later that night without Jimin.

“Hi, darling.” Your grandmother greeted, only noticing the way your hair stuck onto your wet cheeks once you came into the kitchen light. 

“Oh, bless your little cotton socks, come here.”

She held you as you cried — she cried too, knowing that this meant goodbye in more ways than one. 

She slept in your bed that night, holding you close in a way that she did for your mother and that your mother once did for you. There was so much you could never repay your grandmother for. You’d spend the rest of your life calling her from every city apologizing if that's what it took for her to forgive you for choosing to leave once again. But even if hadn’t told your grandmother you were leaving, even if she didn’t help you pack your bags that very next morning, she would forgive you because all she ever wanted was for you to follow your heart. 

The same heart that had her drop you off at Jimin’s the next day.

Your knuckles rapped a somber tune onto his door, the sun pleasantly hitting on your skin, very polar opposite to how cold your insides felt.

You could hear a scuffling from inside the shed, suddenly embarrassingly aware of how little soundproofing Jimin’s room had. Thank goodness it was far from the main house.

“Y/N?” Jimin called out, the door handle turning. 

Panicking, you gripped the handle, holding the door shut.

“Wait! Don’t open the door.” You warned, not exactly sure what came over you.

“Why? Bug, what’s wrong?” Jimin sounded concerned but let go of the handle regardless.

You fought with your thoughts for a moment.

“I can’t... If I see your face I’ll...”

You were a coward. You swore this time you wouldn’t just disappear, you had seen the pain you had caused him. But even still, even when you came to tell him you were leaving, you couldn’t bear to see his face. You could not see the face of the man you loved so much and tell him you were leaving him. You just couldn’t. 

You didn’t feel strong or brave or anything Jimin insisted you were. Hand pressed against the closed door to Jimin’s room, you felt small and pitiful, far from someone who should be asking what you were about to do.

“I’m going to say something. It doesn’t need a response now, okay?” You called out, loud enough so he could hear.

You swallowed roughly, your throat dry. “My bus ride back home is today. Noon.”

Silence fell.

Your heart was pounding in your throat, nearly blocking out the words you had spent all night rehearsing.

“If you don’t show up, I’ll go. And I won’t come back. I mean it. I want you to move on. You have to try. Don’t give up your life for me.”

Jimin was just on the other side of the door, wearing nothing but a pair of boxer shorts, having just rolled out of bed. You didn’t explain yourself further, and perhaps you didn’t need to. He mulled over your words in his head. 

If he didn’t show up, you’d hop on the train and slip out of his life forever. 

“But if you show up...” you trailed off as if losing your nerve. But he understood all the same.

If he showed up to stop you, you’d stay. 

You knew he could never physically ask you, but if he wanted you to stay, you would. Just seeing him would crumble your resolve and you’d stay with him here forever, even if it killed you.

“This isn’t a test or anything.” You said after a moment as if the thought came to you suddenly. “I know you love me. You don’t have to prove that to me.”

His shoulders sank, realizing what you were asking of him. 

“I just... I didn’t give you a choice last time.”

Your words wrapping around Jimin like an old shirt— warm but ill-fitting.

How many nights had he dreamt of you saying those exact words? How many times had he pictured the night you left going different, with you telling him your plans of leaving and him convincing you to stay? Nothing would’ve changed and you’d go back to spending every night tangled up together and every day in his passenger seat, window cracked and wind brushing past your hair as you sang along to one of his playlists.

All he ever wanted was to go back to loving you like he used to. Loving you and imagining the life the two of you would build here.

“I-I’ll stay here and… and love you and figure out all my emotional garbage. I won’t leave you again.” Your voice was shaking. “If you ask me to, I’ll stay.”

Tears found Jimin’s eyes. 

From the moment he met you, way back in high school, you had talked about seeing the world. You had big dreams that couldn’t fit in this tiny town. You were larger than life and he always knew to an extent that he have to spend the rest of his life running in order to catch up to where you were.

He just never thought you’d run further than he could go.

Don’t give up your life for me, you had said as you offered to do exactly that for him.

He saw the spark behind your eyes whenever you spoke of the city. He saw the way you turned into a shell of yourself at old memories. He would break his own heart ten times over before he would ever keep you here. 

But you would break your own heart ten times if it meant you could save his heart from breaking again. Because if he wanted you to say, you could try to be happy here. Maybe you could try to be happy and try to be with Jimin and try for a nice ordinary life. You wouldn’t stay for you but you would stay for him. 

Because you loved him far more than you loved yourself.

“If this is goodbye, then just know that… I love you. And I’m sorry.” 

Sorry was all you could ever feel in this town. Sorry for all the hurt you caused and the mess you always left behind. Sorry for yourself and the life you would never get back. Perhaps it would’ve been better if you had turned down Jimin’s advances that night at the bonfire. More likely it would’ve been better if you hadn’t come back at all. 

But the one-sided conversation through Jimin’s door was your best attempt at undoing a fraction of the hurt you had caused him, however pathetic it was.

——

You were standing amongst a crowd of moving bodies, watching anxiously as other buses began to board.

“He might show up.” You muttered to yourself. “It's not too late, he might show up.”

“Darling!”

You heard your grandmother call out, and you scoured the crowd before finding her, a breath of relief finding you. She had driven you to the bus station and left momentarily to use the bathroom for a moment — you feared you might have to board your bus without seeing her again.

“They just called for my bus.” You said the second she was within earshot. She looked around with you, watching as a line began to form in front of your bus. But your eyes wandered further, looking past the line, past your bus, and Elvie knew at once who you were looking for.

“You don’t have to go, you know.” She placed a hand on your cheek, pulling your attention back onto her.

“I know…” You nodded back at her, biting on the inside of your cheek.

“…But you want to.” She acknowledged. You were her blood after all. And no time apart could undo the way she knew her grandchild.

You met her eyes regretfully, guilt written all over you.

“I’ll call you every week.” You promised.

She pinched your cheek, “Even every month would do. I will miss you greatly. And I love you dearly.”

“I love you, Grams.” You pulled her into a tight embrace.

“Stay safe, darling.”

The two once estranged family members shared one final hug before the final call for your bus rang out. Shooting the bus station one final once over for a shade of orange, you waved your grandmother farewell and joined the line, boarding and sitting on the bus within a few minutes.

Elvie stayed at her spot for ten minutes, watching as the bus drove off and took her grandchild with it, waving goodbye even when you were too far to even see her.

A tear ran down her face as she clasped her hands together, hoping that you might find whatever you are continuing to search for.

A man joined her just then, emerging from behind the wall where he had been hiding, yanking off his grey beanie to reveal a bright mop of orange hair.

“There you are. Thought you were going to stand behind that wall forever.” Elvie acknowledged him, wiping away her tears.

“Sorry... And sorry to bombard you while you were on the way to the bathroom. Did you manage to slip it into her bag?” He asked.

“Of course I did. She was too busy looking for you to even notice.” Elvie reassured, watching as Jimin stared off in the direction you had left.

Jimin wasn’t sure when you’d find it, but eventually you’d find the black cassette tape he had dedicated to you all those years ago.

“It’s a playlist I made of all the songs that remind me of you.”

If it weren’t for you rummaging through his car, the tape would’ve continued to slip his mind— a forgotten relic forged from the time in which he swore he would never see you again. Carefully selected songs forming a cacophony of bitterness, longing, anger and sorrow.

After you left him this morning, Jimin lay across his bed, listening to your mixtape for the first time in years. An emotional time capsule in the form of plastic film and faded sharpie. He remembered vividly what every song meant, he remembered every raw unfiltered feeling he held for the last four years.

He held onto you for so long.

"Thank you for giving that to her."

“I have to ask… I mean, you showed up. You could’ve given her that mixtape in person. Why hide?” Your grandmother pressed.

“I had to see her. But I knew if she saw me she wouldn’t have left, and she would’ve continued to hurt herself just for me.” Jimin’s eyes welled up with emotion. “She deserves so much more than that, even if she doesn’t see it yet.”

Because you were the girl with stars in her eyes and big dreams and he was just the boy who loved you just enough to let you go.

------------------

THE END and before you yell at me, please respect my artistic vision EEEEP!! I love these characters and want what is best for them and the only way to do that is to honor the life that both truly deserve, even if that means it's not a life with each other. I thought long and hard about how to end this series, just putting that out there bc I know a bittersweet ending can be disappointing. AAHHH ILY MWAH! <3

#bts smut #jimin smut #park jimin #bts jimin #bts fanfics #bangtan smut #jimin x reader #jimin fanfic #jimin ff #bts ff #bts fanfic

[miveras]

Drabble: Clingy | PJM

Pairing: student!jimin x reader Genre: established relationship, angst, fluff Word count: 1.4k Warnings: none

masterlist

You prepare ingredients needed to make Kimchi, one of Jimin’s favorite foods. Washing your hands, you carefully grab a bowl to mix your them in. You skip a few songs on Spotify and start humming as your favorite song plays.

Aware that your's and Jimin’s anniversary is right around the corner, you decide on cooking his favorite meal. You notice how much stress he’s been under lately, remembering the dark circles surrounding his eyes last night. You know he’s always studying and messing up his sleep schedule, and you hope to ease that burden.

You smile, reminiscing your memories with him. After two years, you two were still inseparable and very much still in the honeymoon phase. You still remember him asking you out for the first time, being so cute and nervous.

Just as you turn on the stove, you reach for your phone vibrating on the counter. It reads, ‘Jimin ♡.’ He should be busy studying with Jungkook right now. You wonder if anything’s wrong knowing that he rarely ever calls you during the day.

You tap on the green answer button fairly quickly, in fear that he’s in need of help. “Uh.. Hello?” You ask hesitantly. After a few seconds of waiting, you’re greeted with no answer. You open your mouth to ask why he called you, but a voice sounds on the opposite end.

“Well, have you talked to her about it?” You assume the voice belongs to Jungkook. 

“No, no. Of course not. I don’t think I’d be able to..” Jimin responds. You hear shuffling and a deep sigh on the other side of the phone.

You click the mute button, now understanding that he called you by accident. Trying to hang up and respect his privacy, you hover over the end call button.

“She’s just so clingy at times and I need space, you know? I’m just not sure how much more I’m able to take..”

You try not to jump to conclusions as you end the call, feeling guilty of listening into the conversation. You can’t help but wonder if the girl he’s talking about is you. 

You were aware that you tend to be affectionate, but you never thought it was a problem. After all, Jimin reciprocates that energy.

“Ah.. fuck.” Not paying attention, you let out a sharp hiss after accidentally burning your fingers on the pan. You stare as a red patch appears. You rush to put it under cold water, sighing in relief. You grab a towel, wrapping it around your fingers to ease the pain a little. 

You’d be lying if you said you weren’t upset. You tell yourself to simmer down the affection and let him have his own space for a while. 

A frown appears on your face after thinking about the situation, especially with your anniversary coming soon.

You made a silent promise to confront Jimin about it the moment he walks through the door. You wanted nothing more than to silence your relentless overthinking.

The sound of two knocks jolts you awake. Blinking away sleep, you fumble to check the time on your phone. It’s 6:24 pm so you assume that Jimin’s home. You rub your eyes, still feeling the lingering haze of sleepiness as you unlock the door.

Still feeling hazy from your nap, you inch closer to wrap your arms around him but stop yourself after remembering to give him enough space.

His face contorts in confusion, knowing that you always greet him with a hug. He doesn’t mind though, dismissing it as you forgetting to do it. You notice that he doesn’t mention it, further contributing to your overthinking.

You miss the smile directed towards you and open the door further to invite him in. Once he’s settled on the table, you place the dinner in front of him.

“Thank you! I’m starving. It’s been a long day.” He grins, reaching for his fork to dig in.

You smile in return, reciprocating his happiness until you recall the promise you made to yourself earlier to confront him.

“Why aren’t you eating?”

“I.. uh, already ate earlier and now I’m full. How’s your day?” You try your best to distract yourself, fidgeting with your shirt and wiping your sweaty hands. It’s clearly not working.

Deciding to wait a bit, you fidget nervously, battling the fear building up inside you. The weight of the conversation hangs in the air.

“It’s been good! Jungkook and I finally figured out a stupid Chemistry problem we’ve been struggling with. Ugh.. the Stoichiometry Unit’s gonna be the death of me.” He complains, rolling his eyes.

It only makes you feel worse knowing that you’ll soon spoil his happiness with your insecurities. As soon as Jimin finishes his water, you quickly get up to refill it, sitting down as soon as you do. 

You push the glass closer to him only to be grabbed softly by the hand. He gasps at the faint burn marks on your fingers. You glance at him, and you watch Jimin’s expression turn worried.

“Y/N.. what’s this? Are you hurt?” He runs his fingers against your fingers, gazing at you softly as he awaits your answer.

A heavy sigh escaped you, and against your will, tears well up in your eyes. You didn’t mean to get so emotional, but this was simply your last straw. You were convinced he’d break up with you for being too clingy, and you couldn’t do anything about it.

You blink away your tears to hide it from him, but you knew Jimin saw it. Shocked, he bites his bottom lip, not used to seeing you vulnerable like that. It hurt him to see you hiding away your emotions.

His gaze softens and his hands immediately find their way onto your waist. Tears start escaping your eyes and you’ve come to the conclusion that you have no choice but to fess up.

You find it hard to speak, practically hyperventilating.

“I.. I’m sorry.” You apologize, ruining his day with your crying. 

“Baby, what are you sorry about? What happened today?” His voice softens and shows genuine concern. You wonder if it’s just your insecurities taking over.

Not wanting to bring it up, you try smiling and ignore the situation. 

“Y/N, stop pretending like something’s not bothering you, please?” That’s one of the things you love about him. He cares so much for you, but apparently not enough if he called you ‘clingy’. 

“Jimin..” He nods for you to continue, not wanting to interrupt you. “I heard what you said earlier today. On the phone call.” He looks truly confused, not knowing that he butt-dialed you. You apologize for overhearing their conversation. As you explain further about what he said to Jungkook, you’re greeted by silence.

You look up at him smiling and containing his laughter unexpectedly. You were confused, thinking that he was making fun of you. You try to push him away in frustration but he doesn’t let you walk away.

He grabs your hand, resting his head on your shoulder as he hugs you. He places a kiss on your cheek, quietly giggling at your cute reaction. He chuckles, his voice dripping with amusement, “Baby.. who said I was talking about you?” 

You furrow your eyebrows in confusion, taking in the situation. “What.. what do you mean? You didn’t call me clingy?”

“No, I didn’t. We were actually talking about Jungkook’s friend who kept hitting on me. You’d know that if you ended the call a bit later.” He frowns cutely. “Now I’m offended.”

You gasp, connecting the dots. “Oh..” 

You kiss him on the lips as an apology, running your fingers through his hair. You hold his hand and drag him to go to bed. He says, “Y/N, you know you’re not clingy, right? I love your affection!” You giggle, now laughing at yourself for your silly mistake. 

Your cheeks flush with embarrassment, shaking your head at the thought. You’re glad Jimin was so understanding. 

Jimin quickly changes into pajamas and lays on the left side of the bed. He wraps his arms around you, pulling up the blanket for the two of you. He interlocks fingers with yours, kissing your forehead as you both say goodnight to each other. His comforting gesture eases your mind, making you slowly slip into rest.

You’re so lucky to have him.

#jimin fanfic #jimin fluff #jimin x reader #park jimin #jimin bts #bts x reader #bts fanfic #jimin angst #jungkook x reader #jungkook fanfic #jungkook fluff #jungkook smut #bts ff #jimin ff #jungkook ff #pjm.ver

[arafilez]

☆ ⼂ MEDICINES AND KISSES ﹗

ꔫㅤㅤ ❜[ pjm x fem!reader ] ㅤ⋆ ㅤfluff, angst 𓏧 jimin feels if you can't solve his jealousy, food can. even if it is an old lasagna which can get him food poisoning. ㅤ warnings food poisoning, vomiting ㅤ﹢ㅤ1.5k wc

“For the last time Jimin he is my friend and co-worker, why do you overthink everything?” you spoke in a calm voice trying to hide the frustration in your voice. For the last half an hour Jimin had been continuously arguing with you about your male co-worker who had mildly flirted with you in front of Jimin.

You didn’t think about it much deeply and just smiled along and seeing that Jimin has been boiling in jealousy. As soon as you reached home Jimin took up that topic and you have been arguing since, neither of you backing down from it. “You did not stop him, that is what is triggering me,” he said sighing loudly.

“Why do you care so much anyways, you don’t have feelings for me, remember that?" You reason, hands on your hips.

"We are arranged, Jimin as both of us have signed a piece of paper, go on and sign another paper, we get divorced, there’s no in-between!” You said and put your hands up in defeat, not in the mood to argue any more with him.

Jimin’s head hurt remembering at your words, the phrase ‘a single piece of paper’ going over his mind repeatedly. “You know what, nether am I,” he gritted his teeth and you slumped back on the sofa frustrated by his behaviour. “See there you go again, we are arguing on a point that doesn’t even matter now.”

Jimin stayed quiet silently letting your words process in his mind as he saw you getting up from the corner of his eye. You got up the stairs, to your shared bedroom and took out your pillow and a duvet. Flapping your slippers you went to the kitchen to get some water as your throat has dried after all that fight.

“We are going to talk this out, okay? We are not going to just fight like some toxic couple in high school,” you said breathing out as you looked down turning towards him. “Yeah, I guess I just lost all my appetite after this too,” he chuckled softly as he got up to get up to the bedroom.

“Guess, you will be sleeping here, okay I can understand that!” he said as you internally felt relieved about him being such a gentleman. After your marriage four months ago Jimin was nothing but sweet and understanding to you, he was constantly taking care of your needs and listening to your stories.

You got comfortable with him too, as you felt yourself being relaxed in his presence. But that was not it, your feelings grew towards him, as you imagined fantasies of you together. He still high-fived you, and gave plain hugs, he was more of like a best friend to you.

And you hated it, you loved his sweet and caring nature, and hated how all was just at a best friend level when you were practically married and legally bound to each other for life. Yet, he still showed no signs of being into you and everything, every frustration, heat, love just bubbled inside you causing you to burst occasionally, like for example today.

You hated it, you hated how you lashed out at him, and you hated because you knew, or thought, you overreacted. You didn’t want to be a couple who fought every time some little thing happen and you wanted to be the couple who gets through it.

Setting your thoughts aside, you looked at the watch, which showed perfectly midnight. “Oh great, at this time Cinderella was running away from that prince, would it kill you to make that happen for me?”

 You said this looking up as if you were talking to God and again spoke up, “you know the fall in love part, not the running away thingy,” and you pouted as you sat back. Taking one last look at your phone you set your head down on the couch slowly drifting away to sleep.

Meanwhile, Jimin came down sulking as he opened the refrigerator in the kitchen. Taking out a bowl of Lasagna, he picked it up and searched for a spoon in the kitchen. Finding it he murmured, “If she can’t touch my mind, this lasagna would help me refill myself, ugh!”

The next morning passed quietly, with only a quiet good morning from both of you to each other and a ‘bye’ as you left. The day was extremely slow, for the both of you and you just slumped back in the couch after having dinner as he went back in the bedroom.

Any other day, you two would have stayed up till like 2 a.m. chatting about your day and laughing and relaxing but today was all different. And surprisingly you didn’t fall asleep today, like you did yesterday and looking at the clock you found out it was 1.15 a.m.

Clutching your blanket you sat up, and suddenly you heard a thud in your bedroom. Without thinking anything you got up, and literally ran up the stairs as you clicked the door unlock when you heard a whisper, “please don’t go!”

“What the fuck is he saying?” you whispered as you opened the door, just to see a mess in the room. Pillows were thrown everywhere inside the room and the bedsheet was a mess, as Jimin tossed and turned murmuring to himself. You walked inside and climbed up the bed just for Jimin to get up in a jerk.

“Oh hey,” he couldn’t finish the sentence as he vomited all over your t-shirt making you gasp. You got concerned as you picked him up and carried him to the bathroom. You opened the tap water letting it flow as he vomited some more. You held back his long black hair as you caressed his back.

You tried to connect the dots, because you knew, Jimin didn’t drink and it was not that but food poisoning. Then you realized that you didn’t find the lasagna in the morning. That was when it hit you where it went, and what was coming out of Jimin.

As Jimin panted holding the bathroom walls and your hand. You hurriedly took off the shirt he was wearing and making him stand there you went inside to change. After coming out you gave Jimin a mouthwash and helped him come to the shared bedroom. You threw the dirty clothes inside the washing machine.

You made him sit and got up towards the door, only for him to speak up in a weak voice, “Don’t go please!” “I am just bringing my phone Jimin,” you spoke softly as you ran down the stairs. Throughout all this Jimin had watched you, how you were concerned for him, and how you didn’t get disgusted and left him alone but helped him instead.

You came back and closed the door and sat on the bed. Silence took cover between the two of you and you suddenly said, “You stupid, you ate that days old lasagna and look what happened to you.” Jimin smiled softly at your comment and scooted closer to you putting his arms around your waist.

You looked down, observing the flowered design the bed-sheet since the cover was taken off as Jimin vomited all over it. “Thanks for caring so much,” he whispered as he kissed you write below your earlobe. You sighed pushing him slightly and spoke with the slight anger in your voice.

“Why would you do that, huh? Eat that lasagna.” You said as you stared at him and then whispered, “What if something serious happened?” He loved the concern you were showing, knowing finally his feelings were not one-sided anymore. That would mean he can get to hug and kiss you any time without the hesitation he had before.

You punched his chest repeatedly saying, “You are a very stupid man,” and he laughed at your statement, his melodious laughter filling the room. “I would kiss you, only if I hadn’t vomited right about then,” he said and you replied, “I gave mouthwash to you, so you probably can,” and you couldn’t finish your sentence.

He placed his lips on your, his plump and soft ones, missing with you sweet, cherry ones. You traced your hand through his ‘Nevermind’ tattoo on his chest as you kissed him back. He pulled out smiling as he placed another soft peck on your lips as you two kept your foreheads together.

You caressed his bare back as he kissed your nose, you eyelids and placed a lingering kiss on your forehead. You kissed him across his jawline down to his neck. The kisses were not rushed, but slow, sensitive and sweet, the one that are given by your lover after a long day. The kisses felt like heaven to you, as this was the first intimacy you ever had with him and everything just felt all so natural and ecstatic, as if this was just made for the two of you.

“I am your stupid man,” he said smiling and you said, “You forgot cheesy, stupid and cheesy and a ball of jealous idiot,” you giggled as he shut you up kissing you again, and you smiled inside the kiss. Maybe one wrong fight was all that was needed to lead to some right times.

ꔫㅤㅤ ❜ [ ara's notes ] ㅤ⋆ ㅤidiots in love? lol tysm for reading and liking the fic. reblog if you feel like supporting ^^ ꔫㅤㅤ ❜ [ taglist ] ㅤ⋆ ㅤ@haneagerrㅤmain mlistㅤ misc mlistㅤ navi ㅤ add to taglist

© arafilez on tumblr. please don't copy and repost my work as your own

#ㅤ── ㅤara posts ㅤ𝜗𝜚 #bts x reader #bts #jimin #park jimin #jimin x reader #park jimin x reader #jimin fanfic #park jimin bts #jimin bts #park jimin fanfic #jimin ff #park jimin ff #namjoon #jin #yoongi #hoseok #taehyung #jungkook #jimin fluff #jimin x female reader #bts ff #bts fanfic #bts x fem!reader #bangtan #bangtan x reader #bangtan sonyeondan #bts fluff #˖ ⋈ ˚ ‹ bts › #𓂃 FIC : medicines and kisses 𒉽

[liwaywaydreamer]

My Savior (Ch. 1)

(Time travel au, Royalty au, BTS x Reader)

Synopsis: As a hopeless med student that has been accustomed to the roller coaster of mishaps in life, you were sure nothing could get worse than the current situation you’re in. Unfortunately, that thought didn’t include being transported back in the 1400s, nor did it include you being an apparent reincarnation of the person you hated most. Now, can this get any worst?

Pairing: BTS x reader

Warnings: Inaccurate history, angst, bystander effect, verbal abuse (reader received some insults and humiliated), harmful thoughts, implied politics (in connection only to the story, there are no real politician mentioned here), corruption in politics, unreliable narrator (if I forgot something, feel free to comment or send an ask?)

A/n: university life is shit and I was eyeing for this to be at 5k words but if I stuck to that, I wouldn’t finish this. If you like it, please reblog. Reblogs are worth more than likes here right?

Masterlist

Chapter 1: Like fate, like destiny

You're fucked.

Two words you continuously repeat in your head as you struggle to gather the mess of thesis papers you've left messily across your table the night before. Glancing at your alarm clock not surprisingly on the floor blaring 10:30 at you, sporting a dent not so hidden even if you're three feet away, (a surprising quality for such a cheap thing).

Your class starts at 8.

You tried your best to get to your university as quickly as you can, wishing time would stop a little, or even just go back, afraid of what is about to come. Despite your efforts not to get annoyed (and failing miserably) with the bodies you bumped into on the way and the occasional yelling here and there — from the moment you almost forgot to pay the bus fare to when you're facing your professor right now in front of the faculty lounge, the same professor which you needed to pass your research to— coffee splashed onto his shirt, a cup on the floor, and you on the receiving end of his anger.

He took off his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose, a gesture that you might have found endearing if he had been more physically appealing. You waited with bated breath, so used to his antics. Although some might see this as an attempt for him to control his anger, you however can see past his huge ego and idiotic narcissism, he was only doing this to attract more traction, the audience for your humiliation.

His prolonged sigh was your calm before the storm.

"You can't do anything right, do you?" he sneered as if trying to prove a point to the spectators, relishing in every second of your embarrassment. 

If being a disappointment was a job, you'll be the CEO in no time.

"Sir, I'm really sorry, I didn't mean—"

"SHUT UP!" he screamed as he loosens his necktie. You can't do anything but wait and hope that whatever he does next would suffice for how much you've messed up time and time again.

"You, what can you do right?" With each word, he poked and prodded you, pushing you closer and closer to the deep end. You whimpered, trying to not lose control but failing miserably as there was nothing that you could do to stop it, and whether you were just failing by your standards or the fact that he does not care, he continued his barrage of insults, never letting up despite your attempts to apologize.

"How long do I need to put up with you?" he slurred as he now prods your shoulder, harder and harder with each word.

"Sir, I'm sor— "

"HUH?!" a smack and you were on the ground. All the people in the vicinity just stood there, watching, unwilling to help— being a mindless watcher to the abuse, the true definition of a bystander effect.

Why is it in every discipline, violence needs to be included? Is that how we're programmed to learn? Through nothing but violence? You hoped for someone to help you even if you already knew that no one would. Yet, you hoped still.

If this was your first day in school, you would've fought back. You would've stood up for your pride. That a spilled coffee is not enough to humiliate you like this and that not every misfortune is because of you. But you know better; this isn't your first day, nor is it your second. You know how the system works and who it favors, and unfortunately, it doesn't favor you.

"...waste of space. If it weren't for your parents..." You didn't hear the other words he spoke as he walked away not forgetting to throw the papers he held— papers that were your best effort at reaching your dreams, thrown away with your hopes of being better than what they said.

Needless to say, you were suspended due to behavior misconduct; words that you no longer know the meaning of anymore. You're back to your cage-like rented dorm, whilst your head is everywhere but.

What a cruel joke, you thought. The first time you wanted something so badly for yourself and had dedicated your whole life to had to happen with the world's hatred for you was at its peak. Or had it ever really stopped?

You gripped the handle of your balisong, tracing the delicate and intricate designs you engraved on it as waves of atrocious thoughts crashed into your mind. How morbid, you mused. The same thing that you want to hurt yourself with right now is the same thing that made you feel grounded. You're aware that these thoughts are anything but good, but you're also aware of the fact that no one is going to help you.

Simply because no one wants to.

A medical career was not your parents' choice nor was it ever in their choice, but it was in yours.

You're not unconscious of the fact that a career in the medical field is a lot to take financially, and to be the only one in the medical field in a family of lawyers? You alone destroyed the dreams put on you by your mother who vicariously lived through you, but you wanted it.

And you thought that was enough.

But now, as you sit back on the barren floor of your sparsely furnished room that you once hoped would've at least shown evidence of the life of someone healthy in their early twenties, you had nothing other than your worn-out bed on the corner and a circular dinner table doubling as your makeshift desk, cut off from all financial stability that your parents could've provided you if you only heed to their wishes. Now, you think about whether your current situation is worth the sense of independence you fought so hard for.

Was it a foolish decision to stand your ground? To try to live your life on your own terms? Because you know for a fact that it doesn't matter if you followed every whim of your parents as they will always find something wrong and below their standards with you. With every breath, every change of clothes, every food that you intake, even your education— you were taught that everything that they have given you was a debt you owed them, and because of that they are within their rights to choose for you.

After all, parents only want the best for their children, don't they?

You are by no means the most intelligent person on the campus, nor were you trying to be. But you're committed to what you chose, and you hoped that that commitment can be seen through your effort and hard work. And yet, despite your commitment, those words, those words still echoed in your mind— you can't seem to un-hear those words.

“If it weren't for your parents.”

You wanted to choose a life separate from them, to forge a path of your own. But no matter how much it pains you to admit, you know now, clearer than ever, that it does not matter how far you run, you'd always be hidden beneath their shadows.

To only be recognized as the black sheep of your family.

Instead of indulging your self-pity and sulking alone in your room with a blade on sight much longer than you had intended to, you opt to browse the internet for some fun things to do; a piece of advice you got from the internet since seeing a psychiatrist would be a luxury for you.

And whether it was your misfortune running out finally or yet another adventure of mishaps waiting to unfold an announcement caught your attention:

"Join us for a free tour down the historical lane to commemorate the House of Kim, with events set to reenact the life our ancestors had lived!"

There were more words to the article but as you read on, your eyes fell on the tour's schedule.

"Gyeongbokgung tour is going to take place at 1:30 pm," you murmured to yourself.

It was an opportunity you couldn't miss, a rare sight to see. Despite the mental baggage weighing you down, this was a chance to experience something new and forget about your troubles, even if just for a little while. Maybe this was the way of the gods trying to make up for all the shit storm your life is at right now, but whatever it was, you'll take it.

So, without hesitation, you got up, grabbed your purse, and with the little money you have left, you headed out. You knew you had to take on more shifts at the store or find other jobs to cover for your sudden trip, as your dream of becoming a doctor was fading quickly and surely anyway. But for now, all you cared about was the prospect of exploring a historical place that had opened its doors on a day it usually wouldn't.

Arguably, no one other than yourself knows what decisions made on a whim can do to anyone. Whether this is your intuition telling you to go back to your room to help you or just to spite you away from society, you didn't dwell long on the thought.

All you needed to know is that you're drowning quickly, and you would hold unto anything, even a pair of gilded chains to let you breathe again.

"Gyeongbokgung Palace, also known as Gyeongbok Palace, was the primary royal residence and the largest of the five grand palaces that still exist today in South Korea. Built-in 1395, this..."

As you don't have a lot of money to waste, you stuck to the free guides the palace provides although not very effective when you're standing in the back of 50 people. And looking at how detached and uninterested your tour guide is whilst speaking, without a doubt, you knew that this was just an additional job to her. Not really enough to complain about since the constant chattering of the people around you easily engulf her almost robotic voice anyways.

This trip already cost you more than you expected and standing still to nonsense chatter was not part of your nonexistent plan. So, with the palace map in hand, you left the group with ease.

"Gwanghwamun: the southern gate that became the main gate after some time. It is one of Seoul's iconic sights, having been restored after being largely destroyed by the war," you read while gazing up at the magnificent building in front of you, the swaying of windchimes singing their lullabies in the background. Your eyes carefully scanned every nook and cranny, not wanting to forget this beautiful sight. Although you can't be sure if the scenery is exactly as it looked when it was originally built, the idea of having remnants of the past soothes your soul.

You've always been intrigued about the things that have already happened, or perhaps that's an understatement as your mind always seems to be occupied with thoughts about what they could have done differently and the effects of it on the modern world. Whether it really is fascinating to you or just a form of escapism, you don't want to know. All you do know is that you're a product of the modern world, but something within you suggests that itself was a mistake.

Especially when the Kim dynasty has the best-looking aristocrats you had ever seen.

No, you weren't attracted to them, you tried to defend yourself from your inner turmoil as you gaze upon the paintings displayed. You just know how to appreciate beauty when you see one, even if it's just paintings on a wall. This was once again your Philip Hamilton but with much more injustice. At least with Philip, there were actual pictures of him to bestow the world with his beauty. And although you can commend the talents of the painters of the past considering they did not have the best art supplies during their time, you still cannot grasp the idea that these people existed. Not when they are reduced to the mere splat of colors made to resemble a person.

You couldn't clearly see the features of each man in the paintings, but it's not really anyone's fault for it's just the evidence of time. Nevertheless, your admiration for them never lessened, because it's more than their artificial perfection that deserved your admiration and respect. They were also the ones who did more than any other aristocrats ever did for their people. They were the true embodiment of a regime existing not for the regime itself, perfectly aware of who gave them power. Although yes, it wasn't a democracy, but even democracy has its problems.

All you can say is they did their best to lead their people. At least for some time, as they were the foundation that made South Korea what it is now. Sure, their reign could've ended better, still, they were an integral part of history.

And history should never be forgotten.

Although it disheartens you that their achievements and sacrifices are slowly being forgotten; the wars they've won are now taken for granted, you understand that life goes on and people have their own lives to live. It's another reminder that time doesn't stop for anyone.

As the wind chimes fluttering in the breeze, abruptly ceasing your thoughts. Somehow, you felt a sense of belongingness, despite their faintness that could easily be muffled by the chirping of birds. Nonetheless, it was truly fitting for the place as it only elevated the experience the palace could only give.

You couldn't quite understand why wind chimes would be placed in Geunjeongjeon, other than to elevate the experience, but since the cold breeze was constant ever since you stepped onto the palace grounds, you're certain that the people who are in charge knew exactly what they're doing.

You continued observing the place, trying to imagine what events had happened on the concrete that was paved hundreds of years ago. Was it quiet? Were the roads bustling with people constantly? Or were there just only a handful of people seen from time to time walking along?

You were so deep into your imagination that for a few seconds, you felt as though you were transported back in time. You were seeing groups of three to four consorts walking and talking to each other, palace women walking briskly with a basket on their sides, and a few eunuchs scolding some servants who probably messed something up. And then suddenly, everything came to halt when a booming voice from behind you commanded, "Make way for the Prince!"

As you turned to face the source of the voice, you found yourself making eye contact with a man whose attire you could easily recognize from the K-dramas you'd watched, and even with the distance between you, you can't help but feel he was looking straight at you.

"Excuse me, is this yours?" A little girl's voice interrupted your daydream, her voice so cute as she lightly tugs your shirt, holding out your phone.

"Oh, thank you so much!" you exclaimed, realizing that you were in your head so much that you didn't feel your phone fall off your pocket. You would have another problem added to your bulk of problems if it weren't for the girl.

"No problem, have a good day!" she gleamed brightly and ran off. The kid was so energetic you couldn't even give her something back. 

As you opened your map once again, you accidentally dropped your phone and with it, you see a pocket watch on the ground. And it didn't take you to think twice to know to whom it belongs. Hurriedly, you followed the kid toward the path of the Hyangwonjeong pavilion.

"Where did she go?" you murmured, you were sure that you had seen her walking towards the pavilion, but as you see the bare grounds of the place, you realized you had lost track of her. The pavilion was nearly empty except for a few tourists, and you felt torn between searching for the girl to return the watch or continuing to explore the palace grounds.

As you were going to turn around and try to find the girl, you stopped in your tracks. After all, did you really spend your money to travel here just to end up focusing on returning a girl's missing watch when the palace was only open for a limited time? It would be a waste of time going here if you didn't enjoy your time, right? As you stood there contemplating your decision, the constant breeze grew stronger, making the wind chimes nearby flutter and although messy, they still somehow created the most beautiful melodies. The sound disrupted your thoughts, but somehow provided an answer to your dilemma. You decided to keep the watch and continue exploring the palace. After all, you didn't want to waste your money and time searching for someone who would likely be enjoying the sights with her guardians. You could always return the watch to her later.

As you stroll on the bridge named Chwihyanggyo, your fingers lightly tapping the railings, you thought of one thing that could make this experience a million percent better.

"Why are hanbok so fucking expensive?" you huffed, frustrated at yourself for not being able to afford one. But since you can't do anything about it, you continued walking with a pout toward the buildings that housed the aristocrats of the past. The melodies of the windchimes grow louder as you come closer. And that's when it hits you.

How do you keep hearing them considering you haven't seen one since your first step on the palace? If this was a scene in a drama, you would've thought that the windchimes were following you, serving as the background music for the main protagonist's introduction. But this was no drama nor were you a main protagonist material, and you couldn't help but feel curious about it.

As you stepped inside the pavilion, you felt like you were slowly reaching your dream of going back in time as you gaze at the antique furniture that filled the place. Your fingers trailed the rough edges of the desk, which had subtle engravings that seemed unreadable at first glance: 다 괜찮을거야.

Everything will be alright.

The phrase repeated in your head as you wondered what it meant. Was it a message from the past or just a meaningless inscription? You felt a sense of longing to uncover the mystery behind it, and you wouldn't have noticed it if you hadn't felt it, but the pavilion was closing soon, and you had to leave to look around more. 

As you were about to exit, the chimes called out to you again, tempting you to get closer and follow their sweet melody— almost as if they could sense the curiosity in your mind. You followed the sound until you stumbled upon a backroom, which looked like a storage room that had been converted into a makeshift bedroom for the caretaker. You stepped across the redline, both figuratively and literally, unable to resist the urge to explore further.

From the balcony, you caught a glimpse of the wind chimes dangling from a branch over the lake. The constant ringing didn't falter from luring you in. You scanned the area for anyone who could catch you and when you saw no one, you leaped over the balcony and headed toward the chimes. There was something about the chimes that piqued your interest, but whether it was the chimes themselves or the confusion of how you keep hearing them from afar, you weren't sure, and nor were you going to find your answer.

Because as the popular idiom goes, curiosity killed the cat, and with a slip up your feet into the lake you go.

♛♛♛♛♛♛♛

The row of daisies sat atop the windowsill, bathed in the golden light of daybreak. The silent whims of the wind filled the space, stirring the dried leaves on the small makeshift table below, made with old planks with jagged edges, where jars of medicines sat alongside a worn notebook filled with hastily scribbled notes. There was the usual sound of footsteps and the creaking of floorboards. The palace's physicians and attendants began to trickle in, their visits indicated by the soft chimes of wind chimes hanging above the door.

And the wind blew one more time. As if it's intentionally done to send a message as the image of blurred sketches comes through.

All was well.

Until the peaceful scene was shattered by the thunderous galloping of horses that had shaken the rooms. Until there was the clash of metal on metal that filled the air as swords were unsheathed. And until there were faces with features you couldn't make up.

Muffling, shuffling, screaming, shouting.

It was only chaos and bloodshed, and as it worsened, the ringing in your ears grew louder and louder, drowning out all other sounds and leaving you with nothing but a sense of overwhelming disorientation.

Then, just as suddenly, it all heeds to a stop. The ringing faded away, and nothing could be heard other than the flipping of the pages, the smooth gliding of a pen, and the wind chimes outside the window that began to tinkle once again. You looked out the window and saw a tranquil scene: rows of green grass and golden hay, and the majestic curve of a mountain in the distance. There were no whims nor whispers of the wind.

All was quiet and still.

As if everything was at its stalemate; the equilibrium.

And then, as if a stick had been broken, it happened.

The scene began to shift and blur, colors and shapes warping and twisting like a nightmare. The ground trembled beneath your feet; the tremors so strong that you could've sworn you felt it all as images flickered before your eyes. You saw a crowd of men gathered around someone lying on the cold hard floor with colors ranging from black to white, their sorrows crystal-clear even with the constant ringing. Then you saw a field of yellow flowers, a scenery of green and gray with men running toward something in the distance, their faces twisted in anguish, kneeling and begging in the middle of a field.

The images kept shifting and switching back and forth. Everything was in chaos as if fate itself was unsure of what was to come. But through it all, you struggled to hold onto each fleeting image, desperate to make sense of the chaos that surrounded you. And then, with a sudden jolt, you were pulled back into reality, coughing up water as you gasped for air. As you opened your eyes, the last remnants of the dream slipped away, and you were left with only the memory of the intense emotions it had stirred within you.

Dazed, and confused. You looked up, meeting the gaze of the man who had pulled you from the water, his eyes filled with concern and relief.

You were certain you hadn't met him before, but you could've sworn that those almond-shaped eyes were something you could never forget, etched into your memory with an inexplicable familiarity.

To be continued...

Thanks for reading!

#My Savior #bts poly #poly!bts #bts poly au #bts x reader #bts ff #bts fic #bts fanfic #bts au #historical au bts #jungkook ff #taehyung x reader #taehyung ff #jimin x reader #jimin ff #namjoon x reader #namjoon ff #kim namjoon x reader #hoseok x reader #jung hoseok x reader #jung hoseok x you #jeon jungkook x reader #kim taehyung x reader #hoseok ff #jung hoseok fic #yoongi x reader #min yoongi x reader #min yoongi x y/n #min yoongi ff #yoongi fic

[foxymoxynoona]

After the Applause (Ch. 7)

Header and linebreaks by @awrkives

Single Dad Jimin x Female OC

SUMMARY: Jimin doesn't know how he would have made it this far after the shattering of his world without the support of his thoughtful, generous, helpful neighbor. Hanbyul has lived next to hottie Jimin and his adorable daughter for years now, long enough to remember the wife he was so devoted to and lost far too young. With each safely ensconced on their side of the brick wall of the Parks' grief, it will take an enterprising little scientist to set the stage for a second chance at love.

CW/tags: grief, prior loss of spouse/parent, comfort, explicit sex, secondhand embarrassment, sort of love triangle/web/rat's nest, fluff, cursing, dating apps, fuckboy friends, dancer Jimin, stubborn dad Jimin, stubborn pre-teen daughter, miscommunication, pining

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By Monday Sunnie was almost completely back to her normal exuberant self, but her round-the-clock caretaker Appa had simply ushered the illness from daughter to dad. He knew it for sure when walking her to school left him red-faced, breathless, and shivering. There was no use denying it, no choice except to call Hoseok and other staff to see who could cover his classes for at least today and tomorrow. The last thing he wanted to do was pass this onto his students, especially not with the recital rushing closer.

Besides, he could work on choreography for Taejoon’s idol group from home –that was a gig he didn’t want to pass off. He could really use the additional income this month. Rent was going up in two months and he’d been avoiding thinking about it because obviously he couldn’t upset their lives and move them somewhere cheaper. This was their home. It had been Subin’s home. He wouldn’t know where to hallucinate her in a new home where she’d never been before, as he did the whole afternoon he spent curled up on the couch, sweating through his fever. 

Turned out he didn’t even have the energy to make himself tea, certainly not to choreograph a routine. Once again, Jimin had vastly overestimated himself.

At the last minute he realized he was not sure he could make the walk to get Sun-young. Shit! It was a short list of friends he felt comfortable asking for a favor like that: Hoseok was already covering his classes, Jungkook wasn’t answering his phone, but Taehyung did, on the second ring, like he’d been waiting for a call from Jimin. He was happy to get her but he had promised to go with Seokjin for something and could he just take Sun-young along with him for that? It sounded to Jimin like he’d said to greet the Muppets for the disco party but that was probably not right. The fever made everything fuzzy right now.

But whatever, Taehyung and Seokjin would never take her anywhere unsafe, so that was perfect. He called Sun-young’s school to have them give Sunnie the message Uncle Tae would pick her up and then collapsed on the couch and stopped thinking about anything. The fever was miserably uncomfortable. He didn’t have any adult medicine for it in the house; he prided himself on not getting sick often but damn it would have been welcome right now. Maye anti-nausea too, his stomach cramped and complained even though he wasn’t hungry.

The whole afternoon passed in a blink. He didn’t realize he’d even fallen asleep and suddenly Sun-young’s feet were pounding down the hallway. She knew the code and let herself in, Taehyung and Seokjin right on her heels.

Seokjin called from the hall, “No offense, Jimin, but I’m keeping my distance. I can’t get a restaurant of people sick!”

“I could use a few days off work,” Taehyung joked. “Lay one on me.”

Jimin only grunted at him and eased himself up to a sitting position. Sun-young grimaced.

“You’re really sick, Appa.”

“Wonder how that happened,” Taehyung teased and nudged Sun-young. But she looked genuinely upset, and that last thing Jimin wanted was for her to feel guilty. It was part of being a dad. He didn’t want her to hide that she was sick next time.

“It’s a testament to how close we are together,” Jimin insisted, the words a croak from his throat. “I wouldn’t have it any other way. Thanks for keeping her this afternoon, Tae. Thanks, Jin.” He pushed up from the couch and did his best not to look wobbly. “OK, Sunnie, let’s figure out some dinner.”

“You sure you don’t want me to stick around and help?” Taehyung pressed.

“Nah, it’s fine, I’m good, just groggy because I’m waking up.”

“Ok… but hey man, call me if you need anything, ok? You know my schedule is flexible, I’m happy to help.”

Jimin thanked them both again and flinched when the door slammed shut behind them. The offers were sincere, he knew that, just like he rationally knew his friends did not mind covering his classes or helping him with his child. He had to believe that, because he knew he wouldn’t begrudge them the help. He loved to be helpful. But accepting help when he’d had to lean on them so much was hard. He didn’t feel like it was nearly balanced.

Belatedly he realized he should have asked Taehyung if he knew what was going on between Hanbyul and Jungkook. Taehyung was nosy, he probably knew exactly how long they’d been dating and how serious it was and where they met and the first time they kissed and everything.

Maybe it was better he hadn’t asked though. He didn’t know that he was in a good headspace right now to find out they’d been dating for months now and he was just dumb as a rock oblivious. Why wouldn’t Jungkook have told him? And honestly, wasn’t it right that Jungkook should have asked him first if he had feelings for Hanbyul before making his move? It was the right thing to do as friends.

“Appa are you ok?” Sunnie asked as he shuffled to the kitchen. 

He waved his hand at her. “Yeah yeah, I’m good.”

But she planted herself in front of him and reached up to feel his sweaty forehead.

“You’re really sick, Appa. I know what it was like. Go lay down and I can make my own dinner.”

“You’re nine.”

“So what? I can make some things! Are you hungry? I can make something for you too.”

“I’m not hungry,” he admitted. He hesitated. If he insisted on cooking for her, was this just another way in which he was failing to recognize that she was growing up and gaining independence? Or was this leaning on his daughter in an unhealthy way, expecting her to be another adult in the house?

“We have gimbap, I can eat that. Go sleep. I’ll do my homework after I eat.”

“Ok…” He hesitated. This felt like a parenting failure. “Just get me if you need anything… I’ll just be in my room. You won’t be bothering me.”

Sun-young gave him a serious, decisive node and then pointed her finger towards his bedroom. He’d been summarily dismissed. It made him laugh, which turned into an achy coughing fit, so he did what she said and went to lie down.

Time passed unmeasured, but eventually Jimin rose from his deep sleep to the sounds of murmuring female voices and clinking cookware. For a brief moment, he found himself lost in time to years ago, when his wife might be in the kitchen cooking dinner. Especially after Sun-young was born, they’d alternated day-night shifts since their newborn daughter demanded attention round the clock; she’d been a terrible sleeper. He’d usually taken the night shift because he liked it anyway. 

Just as quickly he landed back in the present time. He tried to push quickly and clumsily from the bed to find out who the hell was in his apartment with his daughter, when he heard a laugh that answered for him.

Hanbyul was here.

He slowed his step and glanced at himself in the mirror over his dresser. He looked fucked up. There was only so much he could do about it though, the sweaty pink shine wasn’t going away until the cold did. He brushed his fingers through his hair, trying to look devilishly disheveled. He was not sure that it worked. He changed his clothes quickly so at least he wouldn’t smell like stale sweat.

He pulled on his best smile as he leaned against the counter separating kitchen from dining and living room. Sun-young stood on a chair and peered through the lid of a deep pot. Hanbyul stood at the counter beside her with her loose sweater sleeves rolled up past her elbows, knife making quick work of an onion. Her hair was pulled up into a spiky high bun, a few wispy strands escaping to frame her face. Her eyes were red from the onions when she glanced up at Jimin. And smiled.

“Appa! How do you feel?” Sun-young asked very seriously again, her laughter from a moment ago deftly suppressed.

“I’m..” He wanted to say good but he didn’t want Hanbyul to take his appearance as normal. “I’ve been better,” he admitted. “But better since this morning… I think…” The scent of the onions tickled his nose and he turned quickly away to sneeze into his elbow. Suddenly Hudu leapt down from the couch and vaulted over to Jimin, jumping up against his legs, like he’d been sleeping too deeply to notice Jimin was even there. 

“We’re making samgyetang,” Hanbyul assured him, as if he couldn’t have figured that out by the gingery smell of the broth. His nose was too stuffy to have caught it from the bedroom, but when Hanbyul lifted the lid on the pot so she and Sun-young could look inside, just enough of it managed to reach his sinuses for him to groan. He had no appetite but for that, he could develop one.

Hanbyul’s raised eyebrows made embarrassment rush through him.

“Oh, uh, it smells good. My nose is all f– messed up, but I could smell that– why are you here?” His voice cracked on the last note after croaking out the rest of it. Quickly he added, “You’re always welcome but we’re sick! I don’t want to get you sick too.”

Hanbyul shared a smile with Sun-young, as if they’d predicted and discussed this response. Jimin tried to crouch to pet Hudu, still spinning around his legs, but his body was too achy. He tried to get Hudu to jump up into his arms, but the dog wouldn’t. A stalemate in which neither of them was happy.

“I appreciate your concern but I think I’ll be all right. I have such a strong immune system, I rarely get sick. Don’t worry about me.”

“I asked her to come help me make soup for you,” Sun-young added.

“I see but– it’s very thoughtful but–” He spun quickly away to deliver a coughing fit into his elbow. Hudu was worried enough to scratch at his shin.

It meant he didn’t see Hanbyul come around from the kitchen until she touched his arm and held out a mug of steaming yuzu jelly tea.

“Please go rest more. Sun-young and I are just fine here.”

“She taught me how to mince garlic!”

“With a knife?!” Jimin cried, barely more than a wheeze of words.

Hanbyul tutted at him –tutted– “She’s old enough to learn how to safely cook things! I was much younger and still have all my fingers. Now back to bed, and make sure to drink that tea.”

She was so firm about it, he found his legs obeying. He stopped just through the door though and looked back. Hanbyul slid back around the counter and looked at whatever Sun-young was showing her on the counter. He knew that hopeful smile of Sunnie’s, that desperate need for acknowledgement. She beamed at Hanbyul’s praise for whatever it was. Together they lifted the lid and slid things in, four hands working together, and put the lid back on. The pot belched at them though, knocking the top askew. Both girls erupted with giggles as Hanbyul stirred and replaced the lid. Hudu sat in the middle of the rooms, as if he needed to see everyone at once. He watched Jimin and something in his eye made it look like he was about to bark and tattle on Jimin for not being in bed yet.

She shouldn’t be here. She didn’t need to be here. It  was asking too much, for her to come into a sick apartment and make soup for him. Sunnie had done the asking and Hanbyul had come and he owed her so much.

Hudu barked.

“Go to bed, Park Jimin!” Hanbyul called, and Sunnie giggled and pointed, chanting, “Go go! We’ll get you when it’s ready!” 

“Traitor,” Jimin mumbled to Hudu. Hudu stretched out to nap, conscience clear.

He lay in bed, as ordered. He sat up to sip the tea until only the dredges were left. He lay back down and listened to the crescendo of giggles across the apartment. They wove through his dozy dreams, swaddling him, rocking him in the rhythm of their conversation. He dreamed of seashell wind chimes on the balcony of a beachside bungalow; he dreamed of a crackling fireplace in front of three mugs of hot cocoa; he dreamed of a cool breeze caressing his skin with whispers: dance on, dance on.

He awoke to silence. The window was black with night, only by the light from the hallway could he find his phone in the sheets: 8:30. Time to get Hanbyul ready for bed. His body ached as he pushed himself up from the sweaty embrace of his bed. He felt like garbage, but slightly warmed over garbage, thanks to his nap-companion Hudu, who had jumped up into bed with him at some point. Garbage that could at least get his daughter’s school things ready for tomorrow, see her to bed, shower, and then collapse again. Maybe eat some soup, if there was any left. 

He forgot to check his hair and face as he stumbled into the hall. Two figures sitting at the end of it made him do a double take. It wasn’t the ghost of Subin, though, and he wasn’t confused by a memory this time, only confused to see them there: Sun-young and Hanbyul kneeling in front of the shrine they kept for Subin by the narrow window she had always joked was for growing a single flower in. So they did grow a single flower in it, though Jimin often forgot to water it so it tended to be more dead than alive.

He paused as Sun-young’s voice carried, “Sometimes I don’t remember very much about her.”

Hanbyul made a sympathetic humming noise.

“I was only maybe six years old when she died? I just remember suddenly she lived in the hospital and Appa took me there to visit her and I didn’t like being there because it smelled bad and everyone was sad a lot.”

“It’s ok not to remember everything,” Hanbyul said gently. “You were very little and sometimes remembering someone we’ve lost can hurt a lot, I think, so our minds… hm, maybe they wrap a blanket around the memory to keep it safe for another time when it won’t hurt so much.”

“Maybe that’s why Appa doesn’t talk about her very much,” Sun-young said and Jimin felt a knife in his ribs. “It makes him really sad.” Jimin felt like they did talk about her a lot. Wasn’t Subin in almost everything they said and did? But less so lately, and that was… hard.

“I can’t imagine how hard it is to lose someone you love that much. You both are very strong. I’m glad you have each other.”

He knew he shouldn’t keep listening to this and yet he couldn't tear himself away. Was it really so bad to eavesdrop? He decided Sun-young was right; despite the shrine, they did not talk about Subin very often. He always feared speaking of her would only remind Sunnie of what she lost, what she didn’t have. It sure did for Jimin.

“I remember her hair was really soft and I would wrap it around my fingers when we read books together,” Sun-young said. “I just learned to read when she got sick and I read books to her in the hospital. She liked Hello Banana Moon and Cloud Bread. Do you know those books?”

“I don’t.”

“I think I still have them. I’ll let you borrow them so you can read them. They're really good but I haven’t read them in a long time. Maybe we can read them together.”

“I’d like that a lot,” Hanbyul said and Jimin could feel her smile even though he saw only the back of her head. The girls sat so close together, Subin’s smiling face beaming down at them from the shrine. He knew where those two books were: tucked into the cupboard beneath the candles and figurines and Subin’s photos. He’d tucked them there when she died because it was too much to read the words to Sun-young that ought to be in Subin’s voice. 

But Sun-young wanted to share those stories her mother had taught her to read with Hanbyul.

The emotion was difficult to breathe around, a pair of fingers pinching the bridge of his nose, a rising tide blocking his throat. 

“I don’t remember much,” Hanbyul said. “I didn’t know your eomma very well but I would see her in the hall or the mail room. She was always very polite and thoughtful. She would hold the door open if my arms were full. If someone left trash out, she would take on the task of cleaning it up, even though it wasn’t hers. One year there was ice on the stairs and our neighbor Ma Gurim who is high in years nearly slipped. Your mother called the building manager and wouldn’t stop calling until they came out to take care of the ice.”

Sun-young giggled and said, “Appa says I have her stubbornness.”

“Her resilience, I think it is. Her brightness. She seemed like she could do anything, just like you.”

“It’s not very fair that she died.”

“No, Sun-young. It’s really, really not fair.”

Sun-young let out a heavy sigh and rested her head against Hanbyul’s shoulder. If it made Hanbyul uncomfortable, Jimin couldn’t tell from her body language. After a moment she wrapped her arm around the girl’s shoulder and rubbed her arm.

Jimin didn’t want to disturb them. He felt like he would be. Anyway, he didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t have said anything better than Hanbyul had and her words lingered with him as he tiptoed away to the kitchen. 

It was too much to ask of a woman, wasn’t it? To come into a house that had lost one and take over being a partner and a mother. Not that it mattered anyway because Hanbyul was seeing Jungkook now but… well, it would have been too much to ask of her and that’s why it was for the best. Probably she felt incredibly awkward talking to Sun-young about her dead mother because it was an uncomfortable topic and while obviously she had navigated it beautifully, it was too much to ask. 

The kitchen had been cleaned so thoroughly there was no evidence of cooking. He opened the fridge with a start in his heart that maybe they had eaten all the soup and left none for him.

“What are you doing?” Hanbyul demanded behind him. “Shoo, get out of my kitchen! Go sit down.”

“It’s my kitchen,” he glowered, and playfully demanded, “Where’s my soup?”

She squeezed behind him and bodied him away to open the oven door where a stone bowl of the soup rested, still warm. The scent of it carried such a strong sense of strength and health and rest that it nearly brought tears to his eyes. That’s it, that’s the only reason his eyes were misty.

“I’ll carry it for you, go sit.”

“It’s time for Sun-young to get ready for–”

“I know, Appa, I’m already in my pajamas. I just need to brush my teeth,” Sun-young glowered just like him, arms crossed at his doubt. “I’ll make you tea and then go right to bed.”

“We have to get your backpack ready–”

“We did that,” Hanbyul assured him. “She wants to eat school lunch tomorrow or I said I would pack her one.”

“Unnie even ironed my uniform,” Sun-young added.

Hanbyul looked embarrassed by that and clarified, “With you both sick lately they just sat in the laundry basket for too long. Sunnie told me about her fundraiser and demonstrations.”

“Appa, can unnie help us make the rice cakes? We can teach her how to make them really nice. I know Appa isn’t a good cook but he really knows how to make the best rice cakes.”

Jimin felt like he was wrapped up in a whirlwind between them as he dove into the soup Hanbyul placed before him. They’d carried on all evening without him, and Hanbyul even had Sun-young ready for the day tomorrow. He didn’t have to worry about a thing.

“I can walk Sunnie to school too, if that’s helpful,” Hanbyul offered. 

Jimin shook his head and argued, “It’s not the direction of your office.”

“You know that?” Hanbyul asked, surprised. 

“I see the direction you walk, it’s not mysterious.”

She grinned and insisted, “It’s not too far out of the way though. I’ll just make my coffee at home before I go instead of stopping by the cafe. It’s better for my wallet anyway.”

“I’m sure I’ll be better by the morning.”

Sun-young put her hands on her hips and said to Habyul, “I think both my parents are stubborn.”

“There was no other way you could be,” Hanbyul nodded and it made Sun-young giggle. “It’s a good thing.”

“Is it?” Jimin teased.

“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that and go brush my teeth,” Sunnie said and stuck her tongue out at him. 

How strange to feel like a cared-for guest in his own home. Hudu had moved to the living room since Jimin left the bed and stretched out in a new nap across Jimin’s slippers, several of his toys strewn across the rug. The TV was off but low music played through the speakers.

“I’ll turn that off,” Hanbyul realized, heading for it. “Sunnie was trying to teach me to dance.”

“You seemed to do fine at the club.”

Immediately she covered her face and sighed, “Let’s never talk about that again.”

“No problem,” Jimin said and meant it. He’d like if they could never talk about him going to check on her the next morning and Jungkook opening the door as well.

While he slurped the soup and Hanbyul fiddled with the CD player and Sun-young sang loudly to herself in the bathroom as the water ran and Hudu decided to take a break from napping and work the squeaker out of his toy, Jimin got a very foreign feeling: wholeness. He felt like he was home. He was home, but he felt like it quite suddenly, like he rarely had done since the very first day he’d come home while Subin remained in hospital.

Sun-young threw her arms around his shoulders and kissed his cheek and bid him goodnight. Hanbyul followed her to say goodnight and turn the light off and for a moment Jimin almost told them where the storybooks were, but couldn’t quite bring himself to it. It felt dangerous to, like if he offered her one more step further into their lives, he’d never be able to let her go. 

Could she really co-exist with the memory of Subin? Was Sun-young really ok with that?

How could it seem so natural to watch her turn the bathroom light off and take Sunnie a glass of water and then scoop Hudu up for a snuggle. She ought to collapse onto the couch in exhaustion after an evening of parenting. And Jimin would collapse next to her, and drag her into his lap so they could stretch out and find something worthwhile to watch on the TV. She’d fall asleep there and he’d wake her gently later to move to–

Shit, he had to stop thinking like this. He had to. It was becoming too tragic to pine for his neighbor too late. He’d fucked up and only his fever-riddled brain was willing to admit how badly. Very badly. As she carried Hudu with her to sit in the chair next to him, Jimin had the unfortunate understanding that he might be very much in love with Hanbyul and been trying to hide it from himself.

I never know what I’m doing but you make me feel like I can figure it out. I think you belong here. Why don’t you just stay?

“I’m sorry if I massively overstepped tonight,” she said, completely at odds with his internal tragedy. 

“No. No, of course not. You can’t overstep but you didn’t have to do all this–” He broke off to cough into his elbow –away from her. If he got her sick, he’d never get over the guilt.

“I’ve told you before, it’s not a big deal. I love spending time with Sun-young and I’m glad you were able to get some rest. I’m serious about walking her to school in the morning too, unless you’d rather have one of your other friends.”

“I’m sorry if she made you uncomfortable talking about… Subin.”

Hanbyul’s sincere confusion was so endearing that he felt a twinge of guilt, saying Subin’s name just as he thought damn, Hanbyul really is pretty, isn’t she? It’s crazy she never went into acting or modeling.

“Why would that make me uncomfortable?” Hanbyul asked. “I’m flattered she felt like telling me about her mother. She’s a part of you and Sun-young forever. It’s unfair she can’t be here to take care of you while you’re sick and take care of Sun-young, but I hope I honored her by stepping in for an evening.”

Jimin nodded, briefly without words. 

Hanbyul gently touched the back of his hand and added, “I’m truly sorry for your loss, Jimin. I don’t know if I ever said that.”

“You did.”

“Well, good. And please don’t think you or Sun-young are ever a burden when you need help. No one is meant to do everything alone and–” She broke off as he suddenly flipped his hand, catching her palms against his. “--and I’m really happy to be here,” she said, barely a murmur as she stared at their hands. Jimin too, unsure how that had happened. It had been impulsive. It was the wrong move.

He drew in a deep, ragged breath and she pulled her hand away. He shouldn’t have. She was dating his friend. He couldn’t say he regretted it. He should have wound their fingers together, kept her there. 

But what would he say? I care about you more. Quit Jungkook and be with me. I’m sorry I was slow but it’s scary, you see? I didn’t think I could do this again…

He pushed back from the table and she leapt up as Hudu jumped down from her lap. She reached for the dishes but Jimin shooed her away.

“I can manage them.”

The fact she didn’t argue seemed telling. She gathered Hudu’s things into her bag and slid her phone into her pocket and Jimin felt an absolute dread that she was leaving. He knew he’d overstepped with the touch. She had to think so, because it had felt insanely intimate to him, just that moment of their palms touching. Her cheeks flushed and he feared it was with anger.

He started to say he was sorry, but Hanbyul spoke over him with a smile that seemed sincere, “I’ll come by to get Sun-young at 7:30. Don’t argue about it, please. I told her I would so it’s very important to me that I keep my word.”

“All right then. Thank you. Goodnight, Hudu,” he said, scratching the dog’s head. “Goodnight, Hanbyul.”

“Goodnight.”

It felt awkward. He felt it. He’d made her feel awkward, and after all she’d done for him. But he didn’t know what to say to fix it, and he already felt like shit anyway, so this one time he kept his mouth shut and just locked the door behind her.

The apartment felt empty with her gone, just him and sleeping Sun-young left, like the movie had ended and there just credits rolling. There wasn’t even music playing anymore.

Jimin knew he ought to get back to his apartment quickly. It was bad enough he’d had to call in another favor, but it was only fair he cover Hoseok’s classes now that he was sick, and Sun-young had science club, and sometimes things just seemed impossible for a single parent.

But walking past the corner florist made him pause. And think. And think. He was a thinker, a planner, he shouldn’t do things impulsively because then things could go wrong and you weren’t prepared.

But things went wrong even if you carefully planned. Time was unknown and unsympathetic and always running out.

The apartment had just felt so empty without her in it, the chair she’d sat in pulled out as if still waiting for her to take her seat again. He felt like he was waiting for Hanbyul to get home from work. One evening wasn’t enough.  

Was it worth the risk of losing a friendship over? Two friendships?

Park Jimin did something he never did: he let impulse take over.

He bought the flowers, a big pretty bouquet of purple and pink and white because they looked like stars and that was her name. Hanyul: Big Star.

He ignored the mailroom for now, because he was on a mission. He was going to shoot his shot. If it caused a rift with Jungkook… hopefully it could be mended. Probably it would cause only a rift between himself and Hanbyul because she’d be gracious about his unwelcome feelings and then he would lose something that was devastating him to have so little of anyway.

“Hold the elevator!” Jungkook called and dove inside.

For a moment they looked at each other, and then Jungkook’s face broke into a wide grin and he asked, “Who are the flowers for?”

“Sunnie.”

“Ah. Right.” 

They’d forgotten to push the button, so Jungkook did.

“You here to see Hanbyul?” Jimin asked, wishing it wasn’t true.

“Yeah.”

“Ah.” Silence as the elevator shimmied to life. “So uh… that. How did that happen? Is it serious?”

“Is what serious?”

Leave it to Jungkook to make Jimin spell it out, the ass: “You and Hanbyul.”

“We’ve got a real connection. Why do you ask? You in love with her or something?”

Thank fuck for his careful control of his face. 

Jimin gave him a playful grin and assured him, “No, no, I’m just looking out for her. I’m just asking if you’re serious about her.”

“You should fight me for her,” Jungkook grinned back.

Jimin’s expression twitched as he said, “I’m not… I’m not fighting you for her.” Gone was his foolish plan to sweep her out from under Jungkook.

Fuck, what an awful choice of words.

“Well not physically, I’d beat your ass,” Jungkook laughed. “I mean confessionally.”

“What the fuck does that mean?”

“Are you at least going to give her a choice? I mean, I’m pretty serious competition, it’d be pretty hard for anyone to– but hey, maybe it’s your lucky day,” Jungkook said and slapped him on the shoulder. 

“A choice… between us?” Jimin’s heart leapt into his throat with hope. Probably Jungkook was just fucking with him, but if he was actual casual enough to give Hanbyul a no-strings choice… well, would she really choose the single dad over hot young bachelor Jungkook… but… but maybe Sunnie could help him make a powerpoint and she’d find it charming…

Jungkook sighed, “You don’t like that idea? That sucks. Listen, don’t break her heart or anything, ok? She’s a really good friend of mine and–”

“No, stop, that’s what I was going to say!” Jimin forced a laugh, stepping off the elevator after him. “I just wanted to say I’m happy for you and that I–”

“Well I’m not dating her but maybe you should before someone else does, if you’re so bothered by it.”

Before Jimin could fathom a response, Jungkook pushed the buzzer at Hanbyul’s door.

“What, what do you mean you’re not–”

The door dragged open to reveal Hanbyul –in shortie shorts and a t shirt with a faded Minnie Mouse on it and stripey flower socks. Her expression shifted at once from neutral to surprise as she stared at Jimin.

Jungkook plucked a phone charger from her hand.

“Hey Hanbyul, thanks, Jimin’s got something to say to you, bye.”

He promptly turned and walked back towards the elevator.

**

“Uh…”

It took Hanbyul half a minute longer than it should have to realize Jungkook had retrieved his abandoned phone charger and departed. Her attention remained leveled at Jimin’s face in an attempt to not die of embarrassment: she’d just woken up from a gloriously braless and pantsless nap to a message from Jungkook saying by process of elimination he thought he’d left his phone charger at her place and was on his way over. Her offer to leave it at Jimin’s was too late; he never responded and she had time to do nothing but drag on shorts before the buzzer at her door revealed Jungkook. 

And Jimin.

He looked so much healthier after his illness –thanks in part, she hoped, to the soup. He looked even better since she’d seen him, when she picked up Sun-young and walked her to school before peeling off to haul ass to work. 

And then Hanbyul spent the next two days avoiding the Parks because she wanted it too much. It brought her too much happiness to be over there, doing simple domestic things with them like that. It was torture not to kiss Jimin’s flushed forehead and brush his hair back and really take care of him. It was unkind to herself and possibly to Sun-young to let herself get so close to the little girl who did not deserve to lose anyone else from her life.

The recruiter had contacted her via email and wanted to schedule an official interview; he promised to call her soon. Hanbyul had done a freaking out dance around the apartment. Then whipped her bra off and fallen into bed for a stress nap.

And now Jimin was standing at her door, seeing her in this disheveled space, holding out a bouquet of beautiful purple flowers. She did not understand and only took them because he seemed to want her to hold them for him.

“They’re for you,” he explained, as if she was an idiot (she was.) “To thank you.”

“Jimin, I told you, you have to stop thanking me. I’m going to start taking it as an insult.”

“Wha?”

“You didn’t have to get me flowers. But they’re beautiful, so thank you.” She loved how gracious that sounded, as if she could be cool about getting flowers, as if it happened all the time (it didn’t.)

“They’re stars, like your name. I don’t know what they’re actually called,” he admitted, laughing at himself.

“Thank you, I’ll put them in water right away.” She stepped into the apartment, expecting that was goodbye, but Hudu foiled her plan, darting into Jimin’s arms –or maybe Jimin had already wedged his body in to follow her through. That brat (Hudu, but also maybe Jimin.) 

“One second!” she called over her shoulder and disappeared into her bedroom to frantically drag on a sweatshirt. It was going to be weird if she completely changed, wouldn’t it? But she was so unkempt. Would it be weird to put on pants? 

She was taking too long. She hurried back to find Jimin going through her cabinets, looking for a vase. The only one was a heavy crystal thing she had borrowed from her mother a year ago because her mother had been grievously disappointed the visit before that Hanbyul didn’t have flowers on her table.

“Perfect, right Hudu?” He tossed a smile down to the pup, and then over his shoulder at her, and she felt simultaneously like a queen and a bug. He looked like that, smiling at her when she looked like this. It didn’t make her feel better that he’d recently looked sick. He had been adorable.

“I’m glad you’re feeling better,” she said.

“How are you? Not coming down with anything?”

Actually she’d had a slight headache all day and her throat felt scratchy that morning, but she wasn’t going to tell him that and make him feel guilty for accepting the help. It was probably nothing. A sudden onset of spring allergies or something.

“I’m good.”

She joined him at the counter but let him do the work of untying the bouquet, snipping the stems with her kitchen scissors and arranging them artfully in the vase.

“Wow, you’re really good at that.”

“I learned some arranging tricks when I was younger because it was cheaper to buy bulk flowers and make our own arrangements for performers than buying the bouquets.”

Her phone rang –a godawful thing because she never had the ringer on and didn’t even know what it was set to– and she gasped as she reached for it, but it was only her sister so she sent it to voicemail. She couldn’t risk missing this call!

“Ouch,” Jimin laughed. “Who deserved that?”

“My sister… I’ll call her back later.”

“Oh I don’t mean to stop you–”

“No, she’s calling to ask about–” Hanbyul broke off. Was this the sort of premature news one gave a neighbor-acquaintance-friend? “I might curse it,” she admitted.

Jimin raised an eyebrow but kept his gaze on the flowers he futzed with as he asked carefully, “Curse what? Not your um, relationship with Jungkook I hope?”

“I have a job interview– uh, wait, what relationship with Jungkook–?”

“A job interview! A new job? Or the promotion at your current place?”

“I don’t have a relationship with Jungkook,” she said. “A friendship, but that’s all.”

Jimin nodded and smiled. He pushed the vase towards the center of her counter and assured her, “It’s none of my business.”

“Why, did he tell you something else?”

“No, he said the same,” Jimin shrugged. 

“When we went out clubbing he had too much to drink and crashed here. Apparently he takes a phone charger with him when he goes clubbing in case he goes home with someone.” Hanbyul shook her head. She couldn’t imagine leading that kind of life. He had only laughed at her advice: maybe stop having sex the same day you meet a woman if you want deep and lasting romance so badly! Then he’d asked how deep and lasting romance with Jimin was going and she had threatened to block him. 

“That he does.”

“You met someone that night too,” Hanbyul recalled –in painstaking detail. She tried to be light as she teased, “Any exciting dating plans? Someone you met on the app?” She had on the exact same expression she knew she wore when trying to make bad news sound like good news at work to the higher ups.

He hissed through his teeth and admitted, “I haven’t even finished setting up my profile. And if you’re teasing me about who I think you are, she’s on the funding board for a scholarship group my dance school works with so I had to play nice. I didn’t realize you’d sneak away on me.”

“I didn’t sneak.”

“Hm.”

“I was way too drunk to be sneaking,” she admitted. “I don’t go out much like that.”

“Me neither.”

“It was fun though.”

“Would have been more fun if we’d actually gotten to dance,” Jimin said. Hanbyul could have sworn there was a note of longing to his voice.

“You don’t want to dance with me,” she assured him. “I can’t dance at all.”

“That’s ok.”

“No, I mean it. Your daughter suggested maybe I’d do better at yoga and asked if I understand what the beat of the music is.”

Jimin laughed and covered his eyes, “Oops. She’s a sharp-shooter sometimes… But no one is a lost cause. I saw you dancing at club and you did fine. Anyone can learn with a little help, I believe it.”

What were they talking about it again?

“Maybe next time. If there is a next time.”

“I hope there’s a next time,” Jimin said. He looked to the side in thought, then shook his head and admitted, “Honestly I was kicking myself. I don’t know why I hadn’t already introduced my friends to you. Of course you get along with all of them.”

“Why would you introduce your neighbor?” she laughed. Try to keep it light. This conversation felt strange for a reason she couldn’t quite put her thumb on. It felt serious, like an air of goodbye had settled around them in a haze. 

She hadn’t even done the interview yet!

“You’re not just my neighbor,” Jimin corrected. “Ma Gurim is just my neighbor. You’re at least a close friend.”

“At least,” she immediately repeated. 

He looked surprised by his own word choice, panicked almost, and clarified, “Not just anyone will come over and take care of me and my daughter when I’m sick.”

“Get over yourself, it’s not an inconvenience,” she teased to cover the way her heart fluttered high in her chest. At least a close friend.

“Get over myself,” he repeated with a laugh. “It’s true, I have an ego sometimes.” He ran his fingers through those blond locks. 

Her phone rang. What timing! She wanted to follow that train of thought: what did he mean by ego? Why was he smiling like that? He wasn’t flirting with her, was he? He must still be sick.

But interview terror temporarily outweighed Jimin confusion, and she answered her phone before it could ring a third time. Jimin’s eyes got big and he shirked his shoulders as if he shared her excitement and didn’t leave.

The recruiter was straight-forward but polite on the phone. There was interest in her resume and application letter. They would like to meet her for an afternoon of interviews. There would be several rounds for this more senior position, she must understand the selection process was thorough to ensure a good fit, which date from a list of available would work for her? Did she have any professional references she could provide for contact? 

Hanbyul flew around the kitchen but Jimin was the one to find the pen and paper for her. She rattled off two former colleagues she had already messaged about acting as references. She could make the date work –though it worried her, taking time off from her current job to interview, like they would know she was up to something and fire her, and then she might not get the new job, and have no job.

By the time she hung up, her heart was racing as if she’d been interviewed already. She hoped the man couldn’t tell over the phone.

“A new job,” Jimin said. “That’s… exciting.”

“It might be,” she agreed. “If I get it.”

“They’d be fucking crazy to snooze on you. Where is it? You didn’t say…”

“Oh, well the company has several branches. One is here but there’s also one near my parents, in the town I grew up in. My sister’s about to have her baby, you know, and–”

“Right, yes, I understand.” He was nodding a lot.

“So now I have an interview,” she breathed out.

“It can be hard to live away from family,” he continued. “I understand why you’d want to move back near them.”

Yes, there were plenty of reasons to go. She had told the recruiter her childhood hometown was her branch preference. It should be her branch preference. Her parents were getting up in years and she would want to know her sister’s baby. She’d set out for Seoul years ago and what did she really have to show for it? Hudu was not an anchor.

“What made you stay here instead of moving back to be near your parents?” she asked.

“Ah, it was a hard choice,” he admitted. “They wanted me to. Sometimes I’ve wondered if it was the right choice. But I have family here too, so does Sunnie. Subin’s parents are here and I didn’t want her to lose that connection with her mother’s family. But also Taehyung and Jungkook and Hoseok, Yoongi, everyone, they’re here. They’re my family too. We have a home, I have my dance school, Sunnie loves her school.”

“That all makes sense.”

“For a long time I wondered if I just stayed here because it’s where I was before… but this is my life. Everything, almost everyone I care about is here.”

Hanbyul was the one nodding a lot now. She looked at the pretty flowers Jimin had brought her, just to say thanks for doing a thing she wanted to do all the time. She knew with absolute clarity that she couldn’t go into a job interview without knowing once and for all whether she too had a family anchoring her here. For a moment the image of her with him felt so real she could reach out and touch it. She needed to know if the illusion would dissolve at the brush of her fingertips. 

It was crazy to wonder. It was wistful thinking. She was crazy fucking delusional.

But she had to know for sure and if there was nothing, if she was completely imagining the flirting, if he just wasn’t ready or wasn’t interested in welcoming her specifically into his life well… well that was good to know. 

“I don’t have a relationship with Jungkook,” she said, feeling like someone else was speaking the words. “But um, I did date Namjoon for a little bit.”

Jimin’s brow pinched in confusion as he repeated, “Namjoon? You already know Namjoon? When did you date–”

“Recently,” she admitted.

Jimin’s eyebrows raised before he said slowly, “Ohhhh. No, really? You’re the woman who… at the club, that’s why…”

“I guess that’s me.” She twisted her mouth, not sure what to say about Jimin knowing her by action. Why was she admitting this again?! “I, um… it wasn’t serious, at least I didn’t think so. It was nice, I mean he’s nice, he’s a good guy, but it just didn’t…” She gestured, wishing Jimin would finish the sentence for her and read her mind. Alas, he did not.

“You just ended it that day we went clubbing.”

“I’d been putting it off. I sort of didn’t know if there was even anything to end, I mean we weren’t boyfriend and girlfriend or anything, we only went on a few dates really but– I admit, I didn’t handle it well, I should have called it off earlier. I didn’t know what to do because…”

She hated that she couldn’t read Jimin’s mind either. His expression was inscrutable. 

“I have feelings for someone else,” she said and felt like a good ten years of her life drained away with the words leaping from her tongue. She didn’t feel in control of that tongue. “I thought it would be better to meet someone else and move past those feelings.” She swallowed and cleared her throat. Her nose was getting stuffy. “But it didn’t work and it wasn’t fair to Namjoon.”

“This someone else doesn’t return your feelings?” 

She studied his face, desperate to tell if he understood what she was saying. She didn’t think she could be any more transparent, it would kill her. But she had to be. There wasn’t room for error and even though he was watching her so carefully right now, leaning forward, mouth open in that thoughtful pout he had, she couldn’t tell if he understood. She needed him to understand. She could be brave.

“No,” she admitted. “At least I don’t think so.”

“How could he not?” Even just that, even if he said or felt nothing else, Hanbyul felt warmed to her soul. 

Her smile flickered as she tried to joke, “I know, I’m a catch! But I’m still honored just to be neighbor Han–” He stepped forward suddenly and caught her face, cutting her off with a kiss. His lips pressed to hers, the softest caress, softer than her wildest dreams. A second kiss followed, harder, more certain, but still unhurried, like he had all afternoon to spend dragging that plush lower lip of his against hers. He kissed the ten years back into her lungs and then some; she felt sunlight seep from his fingertips into her jaw. She was drowning in him.

“He does return your feelings, Hanbyul,” he murmured, their noses brushing. “He’s just an idiot.”

“He’s not an idiot,” she argued. “He’s… careful.”

“So careful he may have missed his chance.”

What a silly fear from a silly, silly man. She slid her hands slowly up his chest, curious and shy at the strong curve of muscle firm behind the fabric. His neck was so warm beneath her palms. It felt scandalous to touch him so much, to hold him so close, to feel his hands ghost down to her waist, his fingertips nudging her closer.

“It’s not too late at all,” she whispered. “Not unless…” Hudu’s cold nose poked her calf and she startled. Leave it to her dog to nose in on the most romantic moment of her life because he couldn’t stand whispering.

“Unless what?” Jimin asked cautiously, as he leaned away to look in her face. Hudu barked and Jimin’s serious expression cracked into a smile as Hudu leapt up and scratched at his thigh for attention. As if demanding ok now what about me, where’s my kiss? 

God Jimin was even more beautiful up close, and now she knew what those lips felt like pressed to hers, and no words could do them justice. It didn’t seem real. Even his proximity didn’t seem real. It made her forget what she was saying until he threw a toy from the counter to distract Hudu and then pretended like they hadn’t had that interruption.

“Unless what?” he repeated.

“I just told you that I dated your friend. We, um, slept together….” Her face felt like it was on fire from the combination of kiss and confession. Double confession. Not the greatest combination of confessions.

Jimin actually rolled his eyes and sighed, “Yeah, I figured as much, I don’t need a play by play. But I kind of have a past too. I was married and she died. I have a daughter.”

“I know that.”

“And that’s not a dealbreaker for you?”

“No, of course not,” Hanbyul said, not understanding how it could be. 

“Then why would your past be a dealbreaker for me?”

“Well, it’s a very recent past…”

He shook his head, grinning, his earring dangling, and laughed, “I don’t care.”

“Really?”

“I think people are lucky if they get one chance at happiness in life. If I get another chance… I’m not going to let anything get in the way of it. Definitely not jealousy about you dating someone else before me. I can only be mad at myself for waiting so long, right?”

The magnitude of what he’d said was not lost on her. Another chance at happiness. That was… big. Bigger than a little crush, certainly bigger than anything casual thing she and Namjoon had talked about. For Jimin to speak so openly and optimistically about a future with her only moments after kissing her… 

She did it, she stole another kiss. She wasn’t going to let anything get in the way of her happiness, either. 

Then she gasped and laughed into her hand, “God, the first time you kiss me and I’m dressed like this!”

“I like it,” he immediately argued. “It’s cute. You’re very cute dressed like this.”

“I was taking a nap waiting for that call–”

He brushed the hair tenderly back from her face and instantly silenced her. The self-deprecation died on her lips because he looked at her like that. His fondness was transparent. How could she not feel radiant? Surely he’d never looked at her like that before, she couldn’t have missed it. The light touch of his fingers sent a shiver down her spine. Park Jimin was a dangerous charmer and somehow she was the object of his affection.

Impossible.

“Hanbyul,” he said her name lowly.

“Mm-hm.”

“Your face is very warm.”

“I’m…” She trailed off and pouted that he would make her say it. “I’m flustered.”

“I think you have a fever.”

“No, I don’t…”

“Are you sure you feel well?”

“I’m fine,” she insisted. “Really.” He pressed his cold hands to her cheeks and her forehead and her neck and she flinched, the muscles there stiff.

He narrowed his eyes at her and accused, “Did I get you sick and you didn’t tell me?”

“It’s probably just allergies.” She felt a jolt of worry. Would her being sick cause Jimin extraordinary distress because his wife had died? 

He cradled her face. He looked at her so sweetly. 

And ordered, “Get your buns to bed. It’s my turn to take your child for the evening. I’ll bring you stew.”

“But…”

“Don’t worry, I won’t cook it. I’ll order it.”

“You don’t have to.”

“I want to,” he insisted. “And not just because I got you sick but because taking care of you isn’t a burden to me either. It’s what good neighbors do.”

“Jimin!”

He snickered and then kissed her again, as if he couldn’t believe they did that now either. She was completely cowed into obeying his order to bed. He cared about her. He wanted to take care of her. And also to tease her, what a brat! She adored him.

“We’ll talk more about this later,” he promised, brushing his nose against her forehead. “If you promise I’m not too late, I can be patient for a little bit longer.” 

“Is this just a fever dream?” she murmured. Was Park Jimin really saying these things to her?! She felt like she’d hit her head and woken up in a drama.

“So you admit you have a fever.”

“No! Maybe… I’ll get my thermometer.”

She did. And Jimin brought over soup and kept Hudu, like he’d promised. And by the time Hanbyul had finished squealing over the phone at her sister –with very little space for her sister to contribute anything– her voice was shot and her nose was stuffed too much to even sniff her pretty flowers Jimin had brought her.

Did he really mean it, that he cared for her too? What did this mean for them? He hadn’t asked her out but said they would talk more later… Should she ask him out or wait for him to ask her out? Should she ask both of them out? Would Sun-young figure out something was off? Would it be upsetting for her? That child was crazy smart, she would definitely figure something out and ask Hanbyul on the spot and what was she supposed to say? I spiked a fever because your appa kissed me.

Being patient was hard. Harder than Jimin had anticipated. He had thought that kissing Hanbyul and admitting to her that he had feelings would bring him peace but instead it drove him fucking crazy because here they were hovering in this limbo space and she was sick. His fault! She’d cleared caught it taking care of him, and all he could do was take her soup and walk Hudu for her. It wasn’t nearly enough, not compared to how much she had done to take care of Sun-young. Definitely not as much as he wanted to do. He could see her shoulders ached with the fever; how badly he wanted to rub them for her. She was flushed and sweaty and he wanted to brush her hair back –in fact he did, but that felt like as much as he could do for now. 

She’d confessed first. God, he respected her so much for that. He’d definitely been about to chicken out. In hindsight he appreciated Jungkook putting him on the spot, but it didn’t escape him that, secretly, if she hadn’t said it first, he might have run away. He wanted to be brave, he did, but he felt so hopelessly out of his depth here. He didn’t think he could be trying this again with anyone but her, only Hanbyul, because she would be patient if he fumbled a bit. He truly believed that.

But they hadn’t had a chance to talk again because she was sick and he had promised to be patient, and he didn’t want to pressure her in case she took it back, if he harassed her. It scared him for her to be sick. He would be inclined to hover. He didn’t want to scare her off already.

Because now that this door was open, maybe open, if Hanbyul meant what she said and hadn’t just been delirious with fever… 

His heart raced every time he walked by Hanbyul’s door. When he buzzed to ask if Hudu wanted to go out again, he felt like a tongue-tied teenager again. 

Sun-young seemed to just accept that they’d been taking Hudu on walks for the last two days as if it was something they’d always done. She held Hudu’s leash and led Jimin on a path around the park that was clearly familiar to her and Hudu both.

“This is where unnie goes when we walk,” Sun-young informed him as they set out on a bigger circle of the park. “We go to the cafe and she buys me hot chocolate.”

“Hudu goes in with you?”

“He’s a very good dog,” Sunnie assured him, which of course he knew.  Jimin suggested they go, since she was clearly leading him there anyway, and listened with bemused interest as Sun-young told him facts she’d learned about dogs from a book at school, and how dogs were bred for jobs, and how she wondered what job Hudu was bred for.

“I think he’s a mutt,” Jimin said.

“That’s not very nice!”

“No, it’s not an insult. He just isn’t a purebred.”

“So?”

“No, I know, it’s not a bad thing,” Jimin insisted. “But purebreds are the dogs who were bred for a specific job. Mutts just… happened.” Because animals will be animals…

“Well I think Hudu would be very good at a job,” she said, and crouched down to scratch his ratty brown fur. “He can do anything he puts his mind to.” Hudu looked thrilled at her praise and nodded and licked the air in front of her, tail thumping against the pavement.

“Just like you.”

“That was cheesy,” she teased. “I wish Hudu was our dog.”

Jimin swallowed and nodded and casually suggested, “Well, he’s our good friend’s dog, so it’s kind of the same.”

“It’s not the same at all. If he was our dog he would live with us but right now we have to go all the way down the hall to see him.”

“Mm-hm,” Jimin hummed. Yeah, tell me about it. He knew it was too soon to talk to Sun-young about this thing that might be happening, that he might be going to date Hanbyul. He didn’t know what that meant, much less could he explain it to his daughter. It might mean nothing. Hanbyul might change her mind. They might go out on a few dates and she’d decide it wasn’t working. He didn’t want to get ahead of himself, just because he was excited. Having a girlfriend wasn’t like adopting a dog, you didn’t just fill out some paperwork and they were yours forever.

“Appa why is your face all red?” Sunnie giggled. Yah, because I thought the word ‘girlfriend’ about Hanbyul. It was stupid to feel so giddy about it, like some deep slumbering part of him was creaking to life. They hadn’t even gone on a date yet. Hudu snipped at buds pushing through the ground in the flower beds lining the sidewalk and that was exactly how Jimin felt. He was waking up. Hanbyul made him feel like he was blossoming after a long, very hard winter.

“I’m just cold,” he muttered. 

“It’s not cold at all,” she insisted, and did a little spin on the sidewalk. It killed him how graceful she was and turning her back on dance but it was her choice. OK. He was living with it. “Hey we should start planning the rice cakes you signed us up to make for the fundraiser, huh? Do you know what science demonstration you’re doing yet?”

“Not yet. Let’s get hot cocoa to warm you up,” Sunnie suggested. Jimin wondered if that was what Hanbyul usually said; the phrase struck him as odd coming from his nine year old daughter. 

Hudu was pulling them that way too, so Jimin went along for it. She was right, it wasn’t that cold, it was actually very beautiful out this early April evening. Hanbyul liked winter but he knew she liked spring too, she would love walking in this right now, just as the cherry blossoms were reaching their peak. It was criminal she was stuck inside.

“Maybe if Hanbyul feels better this weekend we can see if she’ll go on a picnic with us to see the cherry blossoms,” he suggested.

“Because you just want her to cook for us?” Sunnie gave him a stern glare.

“What? No! I’ll cook.”

“You want to make her sick again?!”

“Hey!” he scowled, and pinched her cheek. She giggled and batted him away, but then grabbed his hand and wrestled with it before there was actually any space between them. He wrestled right back as they waited for the light and Hudu leapt around them, yipping like he was tattling. Jimin won by wrapping his arm around Sun-young and pulling her into his side for a stolen hug which she, breathlessly, conceded.

“Didn’t we go on picnics to see the cherry blossoms with Eomma when I was a baby?” Sun-young asked.

Jimin froze.

“We’ve gone other years,” he said slowly. Yes, it had been an annual tradition, as it was for most families. They’d missed the year after Subin died, because he couldn’t handle it. Maybe they’d missed the year after too? “Seokjin and Namjoon went with us last year.” He watched her as they waited, anxious about why she had thought of going with Subin and not with their other friends after he’d suggested it with Hanbyul. Had she already picked up on something special about Hanbyul going along, about his maybe budding relationship with Hanbyul? Was she already feeling like Hanbyul was encroaching on Subin’s place as her mother?

“Uncle Seokjin is a good cook too,” Sunnie mused. “If you invite him and unnie and Uncle Yoongi we can eat so much.”

Jimin laughed awkwardly. 

How the fuck was he going to talk to Sun-young about Hanbyul? He ought to wait until things progressed with Hanbyul, until he was sure she was sure there was a future there. This could be deeply distressing for Sun-young, him starting to date. Especially someone Sun-young cared about so much. It could ruin her relationship with Hanbyul, she could lose another very important person in her life if it was too soon for her. The progress he’d made with Sun-young could be undone. This thing that he wanted so badly might be the worst possible thing for his daughter… He couldn’t do anything to hurt her… Maybe a counselor could help? He was selfish, he wanted it all, but he also genuinely believed Hanbyul would be so good for Sun-young. Fuck, was he getting ahead of himself? But they were a package, he couldn’t be with someone who wouldn’t be a positive force in his daughter’s life, who his daughter didn’t absolutely love–

“Appa aren’t we going to cross?” Sun-young sighed noisily and then laughed at him as he hurried to lead her and Hudu across before it changed. He was sweating now. Was it better to wait to say anything until he and Hanbyul had been dating a while or was Sun-young going to figure it out no matter how they tried to hide it and be hurt he’d tried? But she was a child. But what if she was mad. But obviously he couldn’t tell her something like this when nothing had even happened yet, and might even not happen if Hanbyul thought better of it before he managed to ask her out.

“Ok Hudu, be really good in here,” Jimin warned the dog, despite Sun-young insisting he knew how to behave –as if implying Jimin was the wild card here. 

It was a cute little cafe, just a nice little local place, not too busy but busy enough to be a reputable place. A curved green awning hung over the door and there were cherry blossoms painted on the window. The decor was simple and clean, dark wood in the seating area and crisp white around the counters and coffee machines.

Sun-young marched right up to the line at the counter, Hudu’s leash tighter around her hand to hold him close, like she must have seen Hanbyul do. It was sweet, seeing this glimpse into what Hanbyul and his daughter did without him. 

When it was their turn, the older woman at the counter smiled at Sun-young and asked, “Oh, you’re not with your eomma today?”

A jolt ran through Jimin. He was used to this –people questioning where his wife was, other mother’s asking to speak to Sun-young’s mother, teachers assuming Subin would be the one to volunteer for class things. But worse, he realized with a shock that the cafe woman thought Hanbyul was Sun-young’s mother. This preyed instantly on the fears he had just been living, as if the universe reached down to pluck them out of his brain and bring them into the real world.

“Oh, I–” Jimin began just as Sun-young chirped, “This is my appa! Can we get two hot cocoas?”

Jimin was stunned by the graceful way she evaded the question and only nodded along as Sun-young picked out two pastries as well, and then led him to a table by the window, explaining, “We like this table the best so we can watch people in the park.” Hudu curled up beneath Sun-young’s chair and waited patiently for her to pass down a spoon of whipped cream. She sang, “Who likes whipped cream? Who do? You do, Hudu!”

Jimin blew on his hot cocoa and tried to find the words.

“Um… Sunnie, you handled that very well,” Jimin eventually mustered. He watched her closely, waiting for any sign she was distressed at this reminder of the fact she didn’t have a mother, or confusion around Hanbyul’s role in her life. 

Sun-young looked thoughtful before laughing, “I thought you meant giving Hudu whipped cream! You mean ordering our drinks? I was practicing what to say before we came in here because unnie orders for us but she tells me to order sometimes too.”

“No, I meant… the confusion from the woman about Hanbyul…”

“Oh that’s nothing. People think unnie is my eomma a lot,” Sun-young informed him. “Well, not a lot, but sometimes people in the park or here think that.” She looked at the ceiling thoughtfully a moment, licking whipped cream off her upper lip, then asked, “Are you mad I didn’t tell her the right thing? I usually tell people the right thing but if you tell someone who doesn’t really know you that your mom is dead, they feel really bad about it. I didn’t want to make the woman feel bad when she’s just being nice. She works here a lot and unnie always talks to her.”

Jimin curled his hands around the cup and insisted, “I’m not saying you have to say anything. I know exactly what you mean.”

“You do?”

“People don’t know how to respond when you say something sad, like that your eomma is gone. It’s thoughtful of you that you didn’t want to make her feel bad but it’s ok to correct them still, even if it makes them feel bad for a moment.”

“Oh. You wanted me to?”

“No, I mean that… I don’t want you to think you need to go along with something that makes you feel sad or bad just to not make the other person feel a little awkward,” he rephrased. 

“It didn’t make me feel bad,” Sun-young said. She set her cup down and had a dollop of whipped cream on her nose which she tried to get off with her tongue before giving up and using the back of her hand before he could find a napkin. “She just doesn’t know me. Why?” Suddenly Sun-young looked worried. “You think it’s bad?”

“No no. You’re right that she doesn’t know you. I just meant it’s ok if it does make you feel sad, or if it bothers you for someone to think Hanbyul is your eomma and you want to correct them.”

Sun-young stretched her tongue out to get whipped cream off the edge of her cup before saying, “No, I don’t mind.” If he didn’t know any better, he’d say she was far more interested in whipped cream than this conversation.

“No? Ok…”

“Sometimes she kind of acts like an eomma anyway,” Sun-young continued. “Like she does some things my real eomma would do if she was here.”

Every muscle in Jimin’s body clenched.

“Is that… ok?”

Sun-young couldn’t have looked more casual with her cheek on her hand as she scrunched her eyebrows and answered, “Yeah, why not? Then you don’t have to do everything.”

“I don’t mind doing everything.”

“You can’t do everything,” Sun-young insisted and gave him a look like he ought to know this. “It’s not that I like her more than you, you’re still my appa. But she’s a girl too and she does some things differently and I think it’s better having her around.”

“Yeah?”

“I get to see her so much lately, I mean until she got sick but you said it’s just a cold.” She gave him a quick look like a sudden fearful thought occurred to her.

“It’s just a cold,” he confirmed. “She got sick coming over when I was sick.”

“How did she get sick from you?”

“Hey that’s what happens with contagious colds,” he quickly insisted, afraid where her questions might lead her. “I didn’t do anything, that’s just how germs work. Just like it’s not your fault I got sick after you were sick. You’re into science, don’t you know about germs?”

“A little bit.” She began to rattle off things she knew about germs, peppering him with questions, so clearly unbothered by this entire conversation. Jimin felt himself start to thaw out. Surely it wouldn’t be that easy. It had only been a few years since Subin died. Sun-young’s feelings could change quickly if Hanbyul actually became a more official presence in her life. She was a little girl with such a little girl understanding of the world and relationships…

But she was growing up too. Maybe he was underestimating her. Again.

Once their pastries and hot cocoa were gone and Hudu was getting restless, Sun-young asked, “Maybe we should take a brownie home for unnie so she’s not sad we came here without her.”

“That’s a good idea. Do you know what she likes?”

“Definitely.” Sun-young made the selection, and the woman packed it up carefully, extending her sympathies when Jimin explained Hanbyul was sick. He didn’t fix the misconception earlier. It was wrong not to. He perpetuated a lie. He was pretending something, trying it on, something he didn’t have any right to yet. 

He felt the twinge of discomfort in his heart. Were things moving too quickly? Was it too soon? He had promised to love Subin his whole life, and now here he was letting this cafe woman believe that Hanbyul was his wife, Sun-young’s mother, all the things that Subin had actually been.

But alongside it was this fresh, slightly raw, new feeling. Like maybe those clothes could fit in time. Not yet, it was foreign and uncertain and scary but… but maybe he could get used to it. If Hanbyul could be patient with him

He had a feeling she would be.

“Maybe you can get unnie flowers too,” Sun-young suggested as they passed a woman selling bouquets on the corner as they crossed back to the park.

“I gave her flowers just a couple days ago.”

“Really?”

“Uh… yeah, you know, to thank her for helping out so much while I was sick. But then she was sick so I don’t think she can even enjoy them. Her nose isn’t working.”

“Maybe you should just ask unnie out on a date again.”

Jimin thought for sure he’d misheard her. He tripped on the curb as Hudu leapt ahead, barking at a squirrel. Sun-young dropped the leash and cried out, but Hudu immediately stopped and trotted right back, waiting patiently for Sun-young to pick the leash up again.

“What did you say?” Jimin asked, clearing the cough from his throat.

“Don’t you like her?”

“Hanbyul-ssi?”

“Yes.” Sun-young looked up at him with her big dark eyes, waiting expectantly.

“Of course, what’s not to like about her?” he returned, trying to sound casual.

“I know, and I think she likes us too and you already took her flowers so… I think it’s backwards? But I don’t really know anything about dating. I think you take her to see a movie now,” Sun-young suggested. As if she was really scraping her knowledge here to help her poor old appa who didn’t know anything about dating.

“You… would be ok with that?”

“I guess you can see a grownup movie I’m not old enough to watch anyway.”

But Jimin desperately wanted this permission that chance and the strange wandering mind of his daughter had brought him, so he pressed, “You would be ok if I went on a date with Hanbyul? If I… if we spent more time with her?”

“I know what dating is,” Sun-young scoffed. “I know when we went to see Mango Crush  it wasn’t even really a date because I was there so this time it can be just the two of you.” Jimin walked slowly, taking Hudu’s leash to pull him closer as some bicycles whizzed past and a bigger dog barked loudly. Hudu didn’t like it and stuck closer to Jiminn’s leg. He was thinking of what to say next.

Instead Sun-young asked, “Do you think it’s weird because it’s not eomma?”

“Weird isn’t the word I was thinking but… maybe. Do you think so?”

“No,” Sun-young said. He thought that was a strange answer and didn’t know whether to trust it.

“I miss your eomma every day,” he continued, “and I haven’t wanted to think about meeting someone new. No one can ever replace your eomma. She loved you so much. I loved her so much.”

“I know that.”

“So I just want to be careful. I don’t want to do anything that makes you and me sad. It’s hard to lose your eomma. It was hard for me to lose my wife.”

Sun-young pursed her lips in thought and it broke his heart, having such an adult conversation with a little girl. It was wrong what he’d said before. She didn’t have a little girl view of the world; she’d had to grow up very quickly in some ways. He just wanted to protect what little girl remained.

“I miss Eomma too, I wish she didn’t die. But I like doing things with unnie too. Is that ok?”

“It’s definitely ok.”

“Then why is it weird?”

“Just… because… I don’t know. Maybe it’s not weird,” he admitted because he didn’t know how to explain his complicated feelings and maybe he didn’t need to. If Sun-young didn’t have a hard time holding both Subin and Hanbyul in her heart, maybe he didn’t need to make it weird for her. If her feelings changed, if she felt different lately, well, they would work through that then. 

“Yeah, don’t make it weird, Appa, and don’t try to be funny and confuse her so she doesn’t know you’re asking her out. Unnie says when you are communicating something important, you have to be firm and clear and believe in yourself.”

“Are you… giving me advice on how to ask her out?”

“Yes!”

Jimin glared and assured her, “Don’t worry, I’ll figure it out. I’ve done this before.”

“With eomma? But that was so long ago.”

“Hey!”

“When we get home you can take Hudu and the brownie and I’ll run to our apartment so you have privacy,” Sun-young suggested.

“I’m not asking her out today! She’s sick!”

“But if you wait, Uncle Tae might ask her out! I think he likes her too.” 

And Namjoon and Jungkook Jimin internally grumbled.

“Don’t you worry about it.”

“Maybe I should help. I asked her out for Mango Crush.”

“Sunnie,” he stopped her right outside the building. “I’ve got this.”

She clapped her hands together and agreed, “That’s good, Appa, believe in yourself. I think she likes us a lot, I think she’ll say yes.”

He did not ask Hanbyul out, despite Sun-young’s eager questions as soon as he got back from returning Hudu and delivering the brownie. He tutted her away. Now he wondered if it would be better for her not to have known for a different reason. She might overwhelm Hanbyul. She might make Hanbyul feel rushed or pressured into something she didn’t actually want.

No, he had to trust Hanbyul in making her own decisions. He believed she would. And his heart did feel lighter about it all knowing he had Sun-young’s shockingly full support. 

Instead he waited until Sun-young had gone to bed to make the last phone call he needed to before he’d feel free to take the next step.

“Hey, Namjoon! I don’t want things to be awkward between us so I want to be upfront with you about my feelings for Hanbyul…”

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#jimin ff #jimin x oc #park jimin fanfic #dad jimin #bts fanfiction #bts fluff #jimin smut #jimin fluff #jimin fic #jimin fanfic #single dad jimin #after the applause

[lillsisamarshmallow]

My Angel | Mafia!Jimin X Reader

Summary: Together forever, at least that's what they thought. When Jimin suddenly breaks up with Y/n, she is desperate to know why, but why wont he tell her? Y/n does her own investigation into why he suddenly cut off all contact, but will what she suspects be the truth?

Word count: 3.9k

Warnings:  Swearing, Violence, Blood, Gore, Breakup, Verbal Argument, Angst, Let me know if I missed any!

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~~~

The car jumped as it went over another bump in the uneven track, jolting Jimin around, his hand still grasped around the handle above him, he kept his eyes straight ahead boring into the back of the driver's seat. The ride to their location had taken a turn into the bush, tracks from previous vehicles lead the way through the thick and dense forest, despite the rough ride it wasn't until the man beside him spoke that Jimin finally tore his eyes away from the headrest in front of him.

Turning to the side, Jimin's eyes met with the taller man, whose broad chest barely fit under the seatbelt that was wrapped around him, his long black hair and dark eyes, accompanied by his dark turtlenecked top and black coat. "Are you alright? You seemed spaced out." The man asked as he smiled.

Jimin already knew what he was going to say, the same thing he said every time someone asked this question in the last 2 weeks. "I'm fine, just tired Namjoon." Jimin gave his friend a fake smile as he responded, trying to seem more together than he really was, because the truth was, Jimin had been a wreck for the past month, he wasn't getting any sleep and kept going out on jobs to distract his mind, and when they wouldn't allow him, he would spend hours training, giving himself something else to focus on, anything else to focus on, anything, but you.

"Don't give me that shit, Jimin. I know something is up, we're almost there so tell me before we arrive." Namjoon responded half laughing at the start before his toned turned serious. "Is it about Y/n?"

Jimin sighed feeling defeated, they were both stuck in a car and now Namjoon wouldn't let it go. "It's just, I can't sleep, I can't eat, and I can't get her out of my head." Jimin confessed. "It's feels like I'm constantly drowning in my mind, something keeps pulling me down further and further. I wish it didn't have to be like this."

"I know, but you know this is how it has to be. It's too dangerous for her, we know what could happen if she gets too involved."

Jimin grunted in agreement and turned to look out the window, his sign of saying that this conversation was over, Jimin went on this mission to stop himself from thinking about you and now you were the only thing on his mind, and this wasn't helping. All Jimin wanted to do was stay holding you in his arms and tell you everything was going to be okay.

Oh how he'd wish that he was with you, still lying in bed after the alarms had gone off, slowly watching as the morning sun lit up the room around him, tucked in bed with tangled legs, the feeling of your chest slowly rising and falling against his own as your breath fanned over his neck, he wanted to whisper sweet nothings into your ear and tell you that everything would be okay, that he'd always be here with you, but he couldn't, he wasn't, instead of spending his days with you, he was forced to be here, away from you.

Namjoon seemed to take a hint and dropped it before letting Jimin know that they were arriving.

Hopefully this job would distract him from the only thing playing on his mind, you.

~~~

It was early morning and the sun started to shine through the curtains, groaning, I rolled over to face Jimin, his blond hair fell over his face as he slept, I could see the blankets moving with every breath he took. He must have snuck in again late last night, something that had become almost a ritual at this point. I wiggled myself closer to him, Jimin was always really warm so I used his warmth to keep me warm too, I pulled my arms into my chest and snuggled my head in his chest trying to soak up his warmth, my movements must have alerted him as he began to stir in his sleep. 

Jimin was always a light sleeper, even the smallest of noises woke him up so it was no surprise that my attempts to get comfy and warm had woken him up, I looked up at him just as his eyes opened, he looked tired, but alert before locking eyes with me, a small smile spread on his lips as he moved his arm to wrap around me, pulling me closer into his body.

"Morning, Angel." He said with his slightly gruff morning voice, he shuffled around a bit creating some more space between our faces so we could properly see each other, but he kept the rest of our bodies close as can be by tangling his legs with mine.

I gave him a sleepy smile and closed my eyes before opening them again, I moved my face up to his and planted a small kiss on his lips. "Morning, Baby." I said before shrinking back down and looking up at his giddy smile.

"Can I have another one?" He pleaded at me with his puppy eyes.

"Of course, you can, my love." I said as I caressed his cheek before moving myself towards him again, my lips made contact with his before separating again, going back for more, I kissed the side of his mouth before doing the same to the other side, then I moved back down again looking up at him. "Better?" I hummed.

"Hmmm, well," He pretended to think as he looked up. "I think you missed a spot." He smirked at me. I giggled at his antics before pulling him down to my level, I pressed my lips to his cheek before littering more smooches all of his face, if I had been wearing my lipstick, he would be covered in it. Eventually I stopped and moved us apart, we locked eyes for a few moments before we both erupted into a fit of giggles.

"I love you so much, Angel."

"I love you too."

~~~

The sound of bones breaking, and pain laced screaming let Jimin know he was doing his job correctly, dropping the barely conscious man, Jimin continued to walk through the mostly abandoned building, wiping his bloody hands on a handkerchief, people were running everywhere, parents, children, elderly. Jimin could pick out his men amongst the chaos and somewhere there was Namjoon too, Jimin kept his gun close to him so he could easily use it if necessary.  

The building was dilapidated and in the back of his mind he was nervous that it could collapse at any second, but he pressed on, he had to complete the mission, he had to do something. He kept himself composed and focused, but in the back of his mind, slowly creeping up on him, he could fell it, the weird sense of tension and unavoidable stress that was ready to take him and pull him back under and into the depths.

"Damn it, Namjoon." Jimin hissed under his breath, frustrated that the taller man had brought you up and now he couldn't stop thinking about you.

Jimin had to keep reminding himself why he was here and not with you, seeing the parents with their children reminded him of the life he could never have with you, the life he wanted with you, the one he had to give up. Sometimes Jimin would wonder where you were or if you were doing okay now, you hadn’t tried to reach out to him for a while, had you gotten over it? Or did something bad happen?

Jimin shook his head, trying to get you out of it, he had a job, a mission, and he needed to complete it.

Noticing a group of men holding other hostages, Jimin stopped on his path to nowhere in particular, thankfully due to the amount of people he was able to slip out of sight and behind a beam, turning to face the group, he held his gun up aiming at the targets, he had to make sure he didn't accidently hit the wrong person, Jimin's finger pulled on the trigger, five shots, five hollowing sounds as each bullet met its target, its destiny, five thumps as five bodies fell to the floor, five steps and he was on his way.

~~~

My eyes widened at what Jimin had said. “What?” I said, giving an airy laugh at the end, thinking he was joking or playing a prank that the others had put him up to.

“I have to break up with you.” He said, staring into my soul. Those words, he said them again, but they still didn’t seem real.

“What do you mean you have to break up with me?” I asked in disbelief while stepping closer. “Did I do something wrong? We can talk this out surely.”

“I can’t stay with you. It’s not… safe… for you.” Jimin mumbled the last part, tears were starting to build in my eyes, but I wouldn’t let them fall until I knew it was real.

What did he mean it wasn't safe? Safe as in it was too risky? Did he really think that low of me? No, he wouldn't. “Safe? Safe? You want to break up because I’m not safe? What kind of excuse is that? Jimin, I-”

“No! Y/n, we can’t keep doing this, I’m sorry…” Jimin turned around as he slowly started walking towards the door. I ran towards him and tried pleading with him to stay, telling him that we could work this out if we just talked about it, I tried to hold him back, but he was too strong. I fell backwards and landed on my ass as he was standing in the doorway.

“Please, Jimin.” Big fat tears were welling up in my eyes before falling down my cheeks and landing on the wooden floor beneath me. Why was he doing this? I don't understand. Why won't he talk to me? “W-why are you leaving me?” I started chocking on my words.

He didn’t even turn around, he didn’t even have the decency to help me up and to give me a proper reason, he faced out into the hallway as he spoke before he shut the door behind him, leaving me all alone in our apartment.

“I have to do this.”

~~~

Their men had rounded up the organizers of this ring and had them all tied up on some spare chairs that were laying around. Both men had finally met back up after taking care of their own business, now taking care of some business together.

“So, Jaehyun is still making money off of silly little rings like this huh?” The older man spoke while looking at one of the men who was tied up. The silence temporarily filled the room at the men’s refusal to answer to Namjoon and instead just teasingly smirk at him, but what a mistake that would be, the empty silence was soon filled with agonizing yelps and groans as Namjoon had punched the man in front of him in between his stomach and chest, getting his diaphragm.

“Still want to stay silent?”

The man grunted and huffed as he struggled to breathe due to his spasming lungs, he was too slow to say anything as Namjoon wound up and hit him again this time right in the face causing the man to yell out again.

“Looks like you should start talking.” Namjoon smirked as he pushed his hair back with his clean hand and flicking the blood of his work hand. Jimin turned to the guy in front of him and started questioning him.

“You’re sick you know that? Now tell me, where is the next drop?” Jimin asked, eyeing down the man. He didn’t say anything, but his face showed how scared he was of the man in front of him. Jimin sighed and smirked before he shrugged off his suit jacket, he just bought it, he didn't want to get it dirty. He swung the jacket onto his right hand before extending out. Jimin stared the man down as one of his men took the jacket from his hand and quickly paced a crowbar in its placed, Jimin backed up a bit. Now was this a little much for the first time? Probably, did Jimin care? Absolutely not, he didn’t mean it at first, but he couldn’t help himself. Jimin swung the crowbar back and the man’s face lit up in fear as he realized what was happening, he started shaking his chair, and yelling, trying to move away, but it was too late, Jimin swung down with full force, bringing the crowbar down on the man’s legs. Blood squirted all over the floor and the man sitting next to him, as well as Jimin, he felt the blood splatter on his face and hair, you could hear the contact the bar made with the bones, the man’s scream was enough to burst ears drums, a very girly scream for a gang member.

“Tell me where his next location is!” Jimin half yelled and smirked at the man who was still screaming as he put his weight onto one foot and turned slightly to the side in a playful manner. That feeling from before that settled itself permanently in the back of Jimin's head, the tensions, like a giant shadow over his mind, it was growing, expanding, until it had Jimin is its clasps, a loss of reason and almost reality overcame him, it was like he had slightly lost control of himself.

Before the man could get a single word out, Jimin wound his arm back up and swung it back down with all the force he had, once again the blood splattered everywhere, coating itself over Jimin’s shirt and pants which he had only got a day before, that pissed him off even more, Jimin didn’t ask the guy again, his arm came back up as the man kept crying for him to stop, but he didn’t listen, Jimin bought down the crowbar with all his might and frustrations, his anger and his sorrows, his guilt.

~~~

I felt empty, but that was the normal for me now, 6 days, 8 hours and 25 minutes since Jimin closed that door, 6 days, 8 hours and 25 minutes since I lost my everything. I laid on my empty bed that I once used to share with Jimin, we even picked it out together after he insisted, he moved in with me, I slowly raised my hand that had my phone in it, even that felt too heavy to lift, and I checked my notifications again, nothing from Jimin.

I raised my other hand over to my phone and pressed the phone app and selected recent. On the top, it said, ‘Mochi 🐶’ (294), I pressed on his name again and the phone started dialling, maybe this time he’ll pick up, maybe he was just busy before.

The phone rang out as I dropped it from my hands, I squeezed my eyes shut as I was overcome by a wave of sadness and heart ache that only half moved on, I scrunched my legs up, trying to make myself small, stuck in my thoughts I started thinking back to that day. ‘I have to do this.’ What did that even mean? He had to do this. Was someone blackmailing him? Or maybe… no, he wouldn’t do that to me. Would he?

I thought back to all the weeks before that day, I racked my memory trying to find any patterns of behaviour, something that changed, something I could have picked up on…

Then I remembered, the day before, when we were cooking, I told him how much I loved him, but he didn’t say it back…come to think of it, he had been acting weird the past few weeks, like something was bothering him.

3 weeks ago, we went to a restaurant on that shady side of town, Jiyoon told me they had great food there, which was only half true, but the whole time we were there Jimin didn’t touch me, or even walk close to me. He kept looking off, like he was searching for someone…someone else.

Or 5 weeks ago when we had a movie night, we watched his favourite movie, but the whole time he kept checking his watch, sometimes he didn’t even hear me. That night… he came home late that night…

This whole time? I should've I seen this coming, he was acting weird for weeks, but I just thought it was stress, but he knew, he knew he was going to leave me, all this time…

Was he okay? Maybe something was wrong, and I didn’t know? or maybe...

As if even possible, my heart broke again.

~~~

Jimin couldn't see, couldn't see through all the rage and anguish as he kept swinging, couldn't see through the guilt, couldn't see through the red, the red blood that had soaked the room and himself, he had given up on keeping his shirt the soft white it once was, now soaked and stained a deep red, the wet material clung to his skin tightly and you could see the outline of his toned chest that laid underneath the fabric. The swinging was useless and this point, information lost because he couldn't control it, but he didn't stop, he couldn't get himself to stop as his mind was flooded with what had been happening.

Jimin hated himself for how he left you, and you must have hated him too now, at first you kept trying to find him, phone calls, going his house, even calling his friends to see if he was okay The first time you caught him he did his best to avoid talking about, he asked you to go home and stay safe, but you kept coming back, again and again and again, until the last time, where Jimin-

Torturing himself by remembering these things as Jimin kept swinging, eventually someone yelled his name causing him to lose focus and momentum. He pulled away and spun himself around, dropping the crowbar as he walked before stumbling slightly, profanities left his mouth loudly, he yelled and raised his hand up to his head and he dropped down before standing back up again and turning around furiously.

He saw the disfigured body of the man that was once in front of him, crooked limbs, unrecognizable face, and sizeable gaping absence, platted over the floor was the man blood, along with other things. Jimin didn't feel sorry for the man, but it was unfortunate that they now had less sources for information, sighing, Jimin picked up the discarded crowbar before setting his sights on the next man inline, as he stalked his was over someone decided to block his way.

The older man stood in front of Jimin with a stern looking on his face, Jimin could see the caring nature behind them, Namjoon grabbed hold of Jimin's crowbar, Jimin knew what Namjoon was going to say.

"Jimin, I can handle this, you can leave."

"No." Jimin responded quickly. "There's nothing wrong, I'm fine. Let's do this,"

"Jimin." Namjoon said. "Go home."

~~~

My arms hurt as I banged them against the door hardly before moving them down to try the handle.

"Jimin! Jimin open the door!" I yelled out frustration before stuffing my hand in my bag as roughly searching for some keys, yanking them out I struggled to fit it into the keyhole. I twisted the jumble of metal hoping that I had chosen the right one, and finally, something was going my way, I forcefully pushed open the door and made my way inside, I kept yelling out his name until I saw him round the corner from his stairs and turn to face me.

"Y/n, what are you doing here?" He asked, clearly surprised. "I told you to stop, just move on already." He sighed as he rolled his eyes and walked towards me, I made my way towards him too, as we got closer, he suddenly stuck out his arm, preventing me from getting closer to him.

"What-Jimin? Come one, let's stop this and we can go home." I tried to reason with him. "I'm sorry that I didn’t see it before, but please let me help you." I said softly while reach my hand out to caress his face. he looked at my hand then back to my eyes, he hesitated before pulling away, I could see it in his eyes, he wanted to let me hold him, he wanted to let me embrace him and he didn't want it to be like this, but something was stopping him, telling him he couldn't, the battle behind his beautiful brown eyes was showing and I wished I could join the fight, but I couldn't.

I went to push myself closer to him and wrap him in a hug, but he pushed me further away before backing up, and wiping his upper lips on the back of his hand.

"Angel-Y/n." He corrected himself. " I told you it’s not safe and we have to do this." He yelled at me, making me flinch, I could see it in his eyes, the battle was hard, and he was getting angry, but he still cared.

"What I don't get, is why?" I said softly while looking down, I heard him scoff before he shoved himself past me knocking me on the shoulder, as he got past, he kept walking towards the door, but I stayed facing away from his, I started rambling about how I just didn’t understand why he couldn’t talk to me about it, why wasn’t he letting me help, what’s wrong? Staring at the floor my vision started to become distorted due to the tears pooling on my eyes before dripping down, leaving dark spot on my white shoes.

"Y/n." He spoke, clearly gesturing for me to leave. "Oh my-" He cut himself off before letting out a yell of frustration. "Argh! It’s not safe and I told you-" He began to say before I cut him off with my own words.

“Have you moved on? It that what it is? You cheated and couldn’t deal with the guilt?” I said sternly as I looked up, resorting to the last thing that went through my mind, I didn’t want it to be true, I need it to not be true.

“No, no, no-” He began to stutter and got defensive, he sounded hurt that i would suggest such a thing.

I turned around and stomped my way over to him, looking up into his eyes. "Then what is it? What can I do to make you happy again? I'll change, I'll get rid of that stupid picture on the wall that you don't like!"

"Y/n, no. You don't have-"

"I can start spending more time with you o-or I can-"

"There's nothing you can do! I'm fine, I didn't leave because something was wrong!" He fired back at me.

“Then tell me what it is!”

“I don’t love you anymore!”

~~~

A/n: My Jimin oneshot is complete! I hope you guys enjoyed it, honesty I'm not so sure how I feel about it. I currently have no plans to make a part 2, but if enough people want a 2nd part then I would be happy to write it, I do have some ideas, and I'm not sure if I would continue with the same style (Switching povs) I might just stick to one pov, but I did enjoy the new writing style. If you liked this please remember to like, reblog, reply or even follow me, if you feel like it, it is much appreciated 🫶 ! I hope you all have a lovely day or night and Thankyou all for reading! 💜

#jimin x reader #pjm #pjm x reader #Jimin #bts x reader #pjm ff #lillsisamarshmallow #Jimin ff #jimin imagine #jimin bts #park jimin #lills kpop #lills bts #lillswrites

[emerald-notes]

Noona! Please! Help! - Part 4

Fandom: BTS Characters: Younger Brothers BTS and Elder Sister Narrator Genre: A Little Dramatic and A Little Comedic Word Count: 900+ Words Warning: Academic stress, despair etc. Note: It’s a siblings AU story of BTS with the narrator as their elder sister. I tried to write something different from what I usually write about. I had fun making this. Hope it makes you feel good too. Happy Reading Everyone :)

Summary: Her little brothers can’t attend to a single task without her help. Be it a dance competition or asking out a girl for a date, they always seem to be finding everything too hard to go through without her by their side. ‘Our lucky charm’; that’s what they like to call her. But what if she turns out to be a misfortune in different situations in one single day?

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - More to come

Goodbye, SNU...:

11:17 a.m. 1st September, 2015

Almost all the students seem to have gotten out of the exam hall already but there is no sign of Jimin. What can that mean?

"I don't think his exam went well, noona!" Yoongi quietly puts my thoughts into words.

I shake my head, "He must be talking to a friend. Jimin’s exam must go well. He prepared for it for months."

"Accidents happen, you know!" Yoongi shrugs.

Finally I see Jimin, slouching, coming out of that building all alone. My heart feels heavy. Jimin will not recover from this any time soon if something goes wrong.

Yoongi calls out, "Jiminah! Here!"

There is a moment of confusion in his face at first. Then it fades to recognition. He slowly walks towards us and gives a weak smile.

"Was it that bad?" I ask.

Jimin nods. His smile turns upside down. And the next thing we know is his eyes are wet. Jimin is crying.

I am sitting at a cafe table waiting for my two brothers to come from the washroom, wondering what life lesson the older one is teaching the younger one in his hour of despair. It does not take long. Finally, they make their way towards me.

���Everything okay, now?” I ask.

“Tolerable!” Yoongi sighs. There is a hint of annoyance in his voice.

As soon as they sit down, Jimin begins ranting about all the silly mistakes he had made. His brain was a mess during the exam time so he couldn’t concentrate properly and he had marked the number of bills and coins in South Korea to be five and four respectively whereas the answer is quite the opposite.

“C’mon, Jiminah, everyone knows that” Yoongi grunts mockingly and I glare at him to stop teasing.

I turn to Jimin and, noticing the dark circles and the sharp jawline, ask him, “Have you been properly eating and sleeping, Jiminie?”

“What?” His look was wearied. That answers my question.

I say, “Listen! What you really need is a proper meal and some sleep.” I check the watch on my wrist and calculate the amount of time still remaining before I meet up with Namjoon. “Alright! Let’s go to granma’s place and I’ll cook both of you some hearty meals.”

Driving all the way to granma’s place is tiring to some extent. It is all the more exhausting when you have a passenger talking non-stop about how terrible he’s feeling and how his life is all dark ahead of him as if not getting into SNU means that your life’s over. I understand that all the unnecessary amount of caffeine Jimin had consumed within the last few months had done little to no good to him. What surprises me more is the level of patience Yoongi has for Jimin. Because I am slowly losing my mind right now.

At last, here I am, trying to make some quick healthy lunch for me and my two little ones.

“You're home already?” The youngest enters the kitchen.

Alright. Three little ones now.

I hastily add more water and some spicy ingredients to the soup before turning to speak to Jungkook. “Yes! Just to prepare lunch. Go say hi to Yoongi and Jimin.”

“They're here?” He excitedly leaves without waiting for my answer.

The familiar sound of the boys’ laughter fills the living room. It is carried to my ears which in turns brings a smile to my lips. I prepare the dishes, pour the soup, take the kimchi out of the fridge and finally call Yoongi to help me carry them to the table.

I am surprised to not find Jimin in the dining room.

“Hyung fell asleep so I carried him to my room. He looked so tired. Didn't want to wake him up.” Jungkook informs.

“But the food will go cold when he wakes up.” I say.

Yoongi pulls the sleeve of my shirt and motions me to sit down, “it's alright. I'll just warm them up for him.”

I say, “You start eating. I’m gonna go check on him.”

Yoongi shrugs, “he’ll be alright, noona. We all do.”

I nod a little but my heart does not agree. Jimin is a perfectionist. I know how much it hurts him when he fails to meet his ambitions. And it pains me to even think how this is going to affect him. He is going to be so hard on himself from now on.

I step inside Jungkook’s almost-bare-except-for-a-bed bedroom and find Jimin snoring softly. He looks peaceful in his sleep. Almost angelic other than the fact that he has lost so much weight over the past few months so he looks kinda ill. His eyes have sunken into perfect brown circles and his jawlines look as if it can cut.

I slowly run my hand over his hair as my eyes start to prick. I wish he would stop worrying about being perfect. I wish he knew he was more than his mistakes. I wish he knew how much he is loved.

I quietly go back to eat. Luckily Yoongi and Jungkook are already immersed in a conversation about some comic books that I barely know about. After a few minutes of munching on my food in silence, my phone rings from the kitchen so I have to excuse myself. It is Namjoon.

“Noona! It's already 1:50. Are you sure you can make it in time?” I hear Namjoon's worried voice from the other side of the speaker.

“I'm leaving home right away. You wait for me a little longer. Can you do that?”

There is a moment of silence. Then Namjoon speaks, “of course, I'll wait. I ain't doing this without my lucky charm.”

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[swanlakebaby]

— missing you | pjm

prompt: seeing jimin after long distancing.

⸝⸝ pairing: bf!jimin x fem!reader

⸝⸝ warnings: smut, kissing, teasing, whispering, masturbation, sexting, dom jimin, creampie, multiple rounds, semi fluff jimin, eating out, swallowing, etc.

⸝⸝ word count: 2.3k

⸝⸝ note: this is one of my favorites that ive written so far! it was fun to write out and i tried to do something new if you couldn’t tell. i eventually want to start a series soon but im still trying to figure out the storyline for that. i hope u enjoy!

• ps: my requests are still open. (please make sure to state whether you want your request to include smut or not!)

nsfw, 18+, minors dni

-

your phone dings , your screen lighting up. you roll over and lazily grab your phone , perking up once you realize it's another notification from jimin. you sit up in the bed and look at the chat.

★ jimin - i miss you so much...

★ jimin - i keep thinking of all things i'll do to you when i get back.

you smile at the message , laying back down on the bed. you stare at the screen for a while as you think of a response. but before you could answer , another message comes through.

★ jimin - i hate this time of year. we're always working on music , which i love , but it means i have to spend time away from you for a few weeks. don't you hate it too?

☆ you - i miss you too ! i hate how cold the other side of the bed is. when are you coming home? :(

★ jimin - soon , i promise.

you grin , suddenly excited about the idea of seeing jimin. hou sit up on your knees and slowly lift your tank top. you go to the camera app and flip the camera toward you , snapping photos of your breasts. you go back to the chat and send the picture. you watch as jimin types , then stops some time after the picture is sent.

★ jimin - you look amazing. i can't wait to touch you again.

a message comes through shortly after. a picture of jimin slouched back onto his bed , his shirt and pants off. the visual of his abs and boxers made your mouth water.

for the rest of the night , you spent the entire time messaging jimin back and forth about random things. plans you had coming up , small date ideas , etc. the conversation then takes a turn as jimin goes inactive for a while. you continuously message him until coming to the conclusion that he had fallen asleep on accident. after a while , you receive a video clip from jimin. you click to watch it , unsure do what to expect.

in the same slouched position , jimin rubs his hand over his boxers , his bulge now visible. he slowly slides his hands in his boxers and takes out his cock. he was hard , firmly wrapping his hand around himself as he pans the camera up. he smirks , before lowering the angle once again. he begins to pump his cock , whimpering and moaning into the camera as he speeds up and slows down. he mumbles your name into the camera as his body stiffens , white fluids spilling out over his chest. he grunts , aggressively pumping out all of his cum until he’s empty. he let's go of his cock tiredly and shows the cum on his hand and abs.

after watching the video , you only wished he could come home sooner. in response , you lay on your back fully. panning the camera up and down your body. at this point , you only had on panties and a thin tank top. you play with your breasts in the camera for a few moments before flipping it and propping your legs up. you take two fingers and slide them down your panties. you begin recording yourself as you intensely finger yourself , the wet sounds from your vagina getting stickier.

your panties have a dark patch on them as you begin to throb and soak through them. you play with yourself for a while until eventually , your legs begin to get shaky as you throw your head back and moan into an orgasm. your body shakes as you slide your fingers deeper into you. panting , you take your fingers out and show the camera. your fingers were sticky and glossy now. you flipped the camera onto yourself and recorded yourself cleaning them up with your tongue , one of jimin's favorite things he loved seeing you do.

jimin immediately calls you after receiving the video. ''i miss you.'' was all he said. ''then come home. please.'' you whisper into the phone. without saying a word , he hangs up. you giggle , knowing that he hated being teased and now he probably had an attitude. you quickly clean yourself up and decide to finally head to sleep. the orgasm gave you a wave of uncontrollable sleepiness and you wanted nothing more than to go to bed and decided that you’d continue the conversation with jimin tomorrow.

-

you feel the other side of the bed shift as someone slides in next to you. you immediately open your eyes , making sure that it wasn’t some perverted intruder. upon seeing him , you jump into his arms as you yell out his name. “jimin!” he chuckles , pulling you into a warm embrace. he sways you as he buries his face into your neck , giving it small pecks. “i missed you so much! why are you here? how did you even get here? it feels like i just talked to you!” your heart was fluttering as the person you loved and cared about so much was literally right in front of you. he looked into your eyes deeply before speaking. “as soon as i heard the whispering , i booked my ticket and began packing. i decided to leave early.”

you couldn’t believe what you were hearing. he left his job early to come surprise you and see you. you didn’t know how to feel. “i love you so much!” you beamed. “show me.” he says , leaning back onto the bed. “you just got here.” you say , pushing at his chest. “i don’t like being teased , you know this. so show me how much you love and missed me.” he bites his lip , looking you up and down. you roll your eyes , not taking him seriously. as you attempt to get off of him , he grabs onto your waist and pulls you onto his lap. “jimin let me go.” you whine , looking out at the morning sky. he chuckles , gripping onto your waist tightly , not budging at all.

you wrap your arms around him , smiling at him. “you’re so annoying.” you mumble. “what was that?” jimin says , smirking. you hide a smile and look down. “why are you being shy?” he whispers. lifting your chin up with his index finger. you giggle nervously , unsure of what to say. “it’s been a while that’s all.”

“then let me take the lead , okay?” he gently pushes you onto your back and pushes his bulge against your thin previously soaked panties from the video. he hums as he recognizes them , pushing himself deeper against you. “i know exactly what i want to do to you.” he says in a whisper. suddenly , he grabs you and lifts you off of the bed , walking you over to the windows of your shared apartment. he stands behind you , kissing your shoulders and rubbing the sides of your body. jimin pauses for a moment , standing extremely close to the right side of your face. “will you let me show you how much i missed you?” he whispers into your ear. chills run through your body as you get excited. you don’t say anything , but you nod , giving him the go ahead. “i need words.” he says in a low voice , playing with the sides of your panties. “show me jimin.” you say.

with that that he slides down your panties , getting on his knees as he brings them all the way down to your ankles. he holds onto your butt cheeks , slowly spreading them apart as he shoves his face into them , licking your vagina in a slow pace. you place your hands onto the windows , arching your back slightly as jimin repeatedly eats at your vagina , leaving small pecks on your folds. you lift your leg a bit and jimin holds it steady. he devours you in a way you’ve never see him before. you wonder how long he’s been waiting to do this. you slowly grind against his face , small moans escaping your lips everytime his tongue grazes your clit. he then stands up and begins taking off his shirt and pants , wasting no time at all. he takes out his cock immediately and rubs himself hard.

he pushes you up against the windows , holding onto your head. he slides inside of you , not allowing you to fully adjust to the length of him. he thrusts in and out of you hungrily , grunting as your butt smacks against his lower waist. “i missed you so much.” he says out of breath , not slowing down the pace. you turns your face to face his , holding onto your neck as you stare deeply into each others eyes. you bite your lips and manage to spit out a “i missed you too.” in between breathless moans. you leave your left hand on the window , taking your right one and holding the side of his face as he pounds you aggressively , not considering the fact that neighbors could probably hear.

after a few moments , jimin stops , pulling out and cumming all over your ass. you turn your head to look as you attempt to catch your breath. he smacks your butt , making it jiggle slightly. he then grabs you and walks you over to the end of the bed. he bends you over the small bed bench. you hold onto the bench , half of your body keeping you steady on the floor , the other half of the bench. jimin holds onto your sides , fucking you. he looks over to the bedroom mirror , running his hands through his hair as he admires the view. the cum on your ass begins dripping down slowly , some of it getting messy and sticking onto jimin.

he looks down and watches his cock slide in and out of you in a fast pace as he fucks you. he grabs onto your shirt and pulls it , using it to keep his pace consistent. “i’m gonna cum again..” jimin mumbles , gripping onto you tightly. the phrase alone makes you throb , your knees buckle as the sensation of orgasming overcomes you. your body twitches as you cum all over jimin’s dick , making a sticky white mess.

small beads of sweat slide down jimin’s chest and abs. he slams into you with one final trust , not pulling out as he fills you up with his cum. you curse under his breath , feeling his cum drip out of you and into the bench. your body felt weak and tired.

jimin slides out of you and steps back. he walks over to the dresser and grabs a few napkins. he begins slowly wiping you clean , making sure to also clean up his cock. you lay there out of breath , your vagina feeling exhausted and sore. jimin teases you , rubbing his fingers along your vagina. you jolt forward , the nerves in your clit extra sensitive now. he chuckles at his , smacking your butt and helping you up off of the bench. he sits down , pulling you on top of him. his cock is still hard. you reach behind you and grab onto it , slowly stroking it. he closes his eyes and throws his head back slightly as his tip feels sensitive. without warning , you lift yourself up and slide his cock into you. he groans , opening his eyes and placing his hands around your waist. “break please.” jimin mumbles , feeling tired.

“it’s my turn.” you say. he hides a smile , leaning back and resting his back against the bed. you put your hands on his shoulders and slowly grind on him. you continue this motion for a while , looking down at jimin as he looks up at you , his eyes half lidded. he can barely muster out a moan as he just lays back and enjoys the feeling of your vagina once again. you prop yourself up on your feet and grip onto jimin’s shoulders , bouncing on his cock like never before. jimin perks up , load moans escaping his mouth. he dirty talks you , teasing you to go faster and harder on his cock.

he suddenly pushes you off , grabbing you and putting you to your knees. you open your mouth , staring up at jimin and begging him to cum for you. he grabs his cock and slaps his tip against your tongue a few times before cum starts to spill out into your mouth. once he finishes , his cock goes limp as he tries to catch his breath. he looks down at you and closes your mouth with your jaw. “swallow it.” he demands. his cum is silky and sweet as it slides down your throat. you do as he says , grabbing onto his cock and cleaning up a bit more. you teasingly begin pumping him again. he swats your hands and laughs , plopping down onto the bed bench.

“if we go again i’ll pass out.” jimin says. “but i missed you.” you kiss his jawline , wanting more. he chuckles and smiles , not taking you serious. “i need to rest before we do anything else.” you give him one final peck on the lips before standing up and grabbing a new pair of panties to wear. when you walk back into the room , jimin lays naked in the bed , drifting off to sleep. “did i put you to sleep?” you tease. he smirks. “i did most of the work. i deserve a break” he extends his arm and reaches out for you. you slide into the bed beside him and rest your head on his chest , listening to his breathing as he slowly falls asleep.

written by swanlakebaby™

#bts #bts fanfic #bts fic #bts x reader #kpop #park jimin #bts jimin #bts smut #jimin x reader #jiminie #smut #smut bts #jimin smut #bts reactions #fanfic bts #jimin bts #bts army #jiminsmut #jimin ff #jimin cute #jiminbts #jimin

[alessiamalfoyzabini]

Dark Moon | Chapter Ten

Pairing | yandere!Jimin x Reader

Word Count | 3,6k

Warnings | 18+, smut noncon, yandere themes, triggering content, drunken sex, forced anal sex, rimjob, fingering, sadism, violence, lots of crying and screaming, teasing, humiliation, blood, hatred, angst, attempted murder, serious injuries, use of a knife, sea of blood, first hints of Stockholm Syndrome, be careful: this chapter is darker than the other chapters and from now on Dark Moon will be much more violent.

This fanfiction is yandere, if you don't like the genre, don't read and if you are not of age, don't read.

I don't want to hear any complaints in the comments, thank you.

This does not reflect my way of thinking or living at all, it is just a work of fiction, it is like watching a horror movie, many of us love horror movies, but we would never dream of what we see in those movies happening in reality as well.

Simply put, this story was written for entertainment purposes, it should not be seen as a reflection of my values, opinions or morals. I absolutely do not condone such acts.

⤷ Summary | She just wanted to escape her past, take charge of her life and break out of her steel cage, praying in God for a miracle that could change her life for good.

And her prayers were heard, but it was not the Divine that answered her.

That was certainly the devil in the guise of an angel, she thought as those corrupted and empty eyes searched her soul with extreme voracity.

He turned a sweet, false smile on her, before pushing her into the abyss.

�� Author's Note | Hi, guys ❤️ Today's chapter was particularly difficult to write, it is very dark and from here on we get into the heart of Dark Moon, which I always remember is a highly yandere story, I recommend reading it to readers who are age +18 and who already have experience with the yandere genre, Dark Moon is not a story with a normal relationship, it is a yandere. For those who will read the chapter, let me know what you think of it and what you believe will happen in the future!

Taglist: @katherine-kookie, @dragons-flare, @m00njinnie, @seokjins-luigi, @pjmsneverland, @jimincrystal, @ajkwww, @ungodlyjoon, @hecateslittlewitchling, @namjoonsbuspass, @darkuni63, @xicanacorpse, @jiminismine4ever

Taglist is open!

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Perhaps it was the alcohol swirling in his body or perhaps his sadistic nature, but he didn't think twice about ripping off even that one too many garments, Y/N squeezed her eyes shut huddling her head between the blankets that smelled of Jimin, everything about that room smelled of him and she felt suffocated by his oppressive presence.

Jimin ran two fingers over the entrance hidden by the young woman's panties, reached out to her clitoris circling it through the fabric, but did not dwell on it for long, without uttering a breath he lowered Y/N's panties badly, finally putting on display what he was really aiming for.

He eagerly squeezed the girl's soft, perfect buttocks, his hands carefully palmed that velvety flesh, she could not understand what his intentions were, why was he talking one way but touching her another?

The boy lowered himself to kiss her back, inhaling her scent that reminded him of the scent of his bubble bath present in the bathroom, she had not confined herself to books, he thought amused, there was something sick about her, something she did not even admit to herself, even as she actively sought something that would make her closer to the man she so professed to detest.

"Jimin..." there, she had once again used his name, the man couldn't hold back any longer, spread her buttocks revealing the small, tight pink hole, and lowering his head the boy left a wet, warm streak of saliva in that never-violated spot, "What the hell-?!" exclaimed Y/N, stiffening in shock.

Jimin was... he was licking her right there?!

Between shame and disgust she tried to slip out of his hands, but the man squeezed her tightly and together with his weight prevented her from moving, continuing to circle around that ring of muscle with the tip of his tongue, occasionally entering a few millimeters.

Forced there and under those attentions, Y/N felt strange, with horror she realized that she was not just trembling with fear, she was feeling a strange warmth that was affecting her lower abdomen, the sinuous movements of the man's tongue continued to wet and stimulate the little hole, saliva slowly slipped from her buttocks to the throbbing, soaked cleft of her pussy.

Pleasure and humiliation mingled causing her emotions so strong as to be unbearable, she untangled herself once again from his grasp and this time managed to free herself, crawled away and by a hair's breadth the man came back to grasp her ankle again, bringing her back under him.

"You're a goddamn animal!" exclaimed Y/N between her teeth, Jimin sneered pushing his pelvis against her, who distinctly felt the rigid presence between his legs.

"Now I recognize my little whore" he murmured in her ear making her shudder, "From the way you're acting I bet no one has ever touched this cute little ass" he slapped a buttock as if to punctuate his words and the woman winced, "Somehow I'll still have a virgin part of you" he growled forcefully and without any regard pushing two fingers into that tight and rigid hole, a scream dictated by pain and shock left the girl's now pale lips.

"No, no, no! Stop, I don't want to!" she was in a panic, Jimin's fingers made no hint of leaving her, the stretch was uncomfortable and burning like hell, the man was already anticipating that moment, he wanted her to scream in pain and sorrow, he wanted her to regret that stupid attitude she had held with him all along.

As he penetrated that tight little cave, he finished lowering his boxers with his other hand, freeing his hard, aroused cock.

He slid down to the young woman's slit without penetrating her, merely gathering over the entire length what little liquid arousal Y/N had produced against her own will. The girl felt the thick presence behind her and feared that it would end like last time, too bad Jimin had something much worse in mind.

Without saying a word he released those tight muscles from his fingers, Y/N almost collapsed from the pain, but Jimin grasped her hips tightly sinking his fingers into her flesh, the girl buried her head between the pillows already imagining the painful twinge that would rip through her core, but she was not prepared for the excruciating pain Jimin's thrusting caused her when he forcefully entered her ass, a sharp, breathless cry left her throat in despair, she wriggled on the bed like a trapped animal, but Jimin easily pinned her down by pounding inside her without any mercy, his hoarse breaths increased in volume as he sank repeatedly into that hole that clenched hard and in pain around his cock, he fell back on the young girl's small body with all his weight, forcing her to spread her stiff, trembling thighs wide.

"It hurts, please stop! It hurts so much, I can't take it!" she cried for air, she had thought Jimin's fingers were enough to feel pain, she had not expected a situation like that, his thick, hard cock was practically opening her in two, she frantically shook her head against the pillow with each stroke of the man's hips, who smiled addicted to that pleasure.

"How can I stop when-uhm..." he paused for a moment trying to contain himself and not explode inside her right away, "When you hold me so tight?" he finished in a voice pregnant with lust, penetrating her completely, who arched her back with a choked scream at that umpteenth assault.

"Now tell me, do you prefer it when I fuck your pussy or your ass? " he asked, increasing the speed of his strokes, aware of the harm he was doing to her not only physically, he wanted to humiliate her to such an extent that no light of defiance remained in her, his balls began to slam violently against her empty, dripping slit, the walls tightened around nothing, and another wave of tears slid down her face, realizing the strange combination of pain and pleasure that was being created in her.

Jimin moved his body slightly from hers, just the slightest bit that helped him to see himself sinking into her once more, the tiny ring of muscle had finally adjusted to his size despite the force with which he still enveloped his cock, he spit a trickle of saliva between them increasing the lubrication of the intercourse and began to give deeper and slower thrusts.

"You didn't answer me," he chuckled, penetrating the entrance to her intimacy with his middle finger, finding it incredibly moist.

He groaned breathlessly as he imagined himself in there, squeezed by that infinite, delicate softness, cradled by the elastic grip of her trembling walls.

"Fuck, can you hear yourself? If you hadn't behaved so badly this is where I would have come in, and we would have both enjoyed it," he growled in her ear, "But that's okay too, isn't it? You're soaked all the same, maybe you really are perfect for the Dark Moon" he taunted her, ramming into her countless times, feeling his balls swell and his cock shake, Jimin's small, intense moans of pleasure slid over the girl's now helpless body, which catatonicly welcomed the man's semen on top of her, he stood there still between her buttocks, pouring the white, viscous cum inside her asshole, before climbing out of her and gazing with satisfaction at that destroyed little hole soaked with his essence, Jimin slid away wearily on the bed, gazed breathlessly at the ceiling, a glance between his legs and noticed on his still half-erect cock drops of blood.

He grinned, satisfied with his work.

"Now you are no longer a virgin."

Y/N turned her head away, unable to move, feeling pain everywhere, even inside her soul.

Jimin had ruined her forever.

"I hate you" was the only thing she managed to say between dry, trailing lips, lost in a spiral of thoughts that only she knew.

Jimin stared at the walls of his bedroom with a sigh.

"You can hate me all you want, it doesn't change what you are and where you are," he muttered, beginning to close his eyes to fall asleep.

You are my whore, mine to have and mine to torture.

He had not said it, but that was what he meant.

The woman felt the man's breathing become lighter after about twenty minutes, twenty minutes of interminable silence.

Her gaze was no longer lost in the void, but steady on the boy's closet, there where she had previously discovered one of his little secrets.

She tried to calm down, not to do rash things, but he had no respect for her, had used and raped her, going so far as to force her into anal intercourse for which she had not been properly prepared. He had used her like a rubber doll, she thought with disgust written all over her face.

She lifted herself up slowly, preventing her complaints from escaping her lips, although she felt destroyed, her legs staggered on her own weight, and lowering her gaze she saw the blood etched between the sheets.

Panic gripped her chest, that same sordid spectacle she had experienced years before, when she was just a naive little girl who did not understand the malice of the world. The girl's tears became constant, but she still maintained silence. No, she could not relive such a thing and do nothing about it, not this time.

She angrily wiped away her tears and with another glance at the closet opened the doors slowly, rummaging through the bottom and finding what she was looking for, she forced her fingers on a small raised dowel and slid the wooden wall to her right, which revealed the presence of a dark duffel bag.

With unsteady hands she unzipped the thick zipper, revealing its forbidden contents.

She tightened her lips, casting a glance at the sleeping figure of the boy, the alcohol had finally taken its toll along with the sex, that monster would no longer be a threat to her.

That morning Jimin woke up with his mind strangely silent, his demons were not there, he stretched out casting a glance to his side and found the place previously occupied by Y/N, empty.

She was gone.

A gnawing in his stomach caged him, making him incuporated. Why the hell should he have cared?

He couldn't remember exactly what he had done that night, but he remembered perfectly well that he had enjoyed it, that was the important thing, wasn't it?

He got up slipping on the boxers left on the floor and headed to the bathroom to clean himself up.

He washed himself by eliminating the smell of sex from his skin, he looked at the bubble bath without a hint of emotion on his face, just remembering the smell of the girl, indeed it was one of the few things he remembered from the previous night, but his mind was still fixed on her, who would not decide to give in for good, he had come back pissed off like a hyena that night; Because she would not give in to him, because Hoseok had made those insinuations, because now everyone believed that he depended on her.

He wasn't. He was still Park Jimin, the independent, strong man. She, on the other hand, was just his tasty and tender plaything.

When he finished his shower he emerged from the bathroom with a towel tied to his hips, his athletic, slender figure a joy to behold, his dark soul sighing in pleasure at the screams of his victims.

He returned to the room to dress and had only time to put on clean boxers and a pair of shorts before he heard the thud of an object falling and shattering on the floor.

He frowned, immediately heading toward the source of that sound, "Y/N?"

He went to the living room looking around, on the floor were the broken and scattered pieces of a vase, but no trace of the girl.

"Y/N? Y/N!" he was getting pissed off, "We don't have a cat, I also doubt it was the wind, so I suggest you-!" an excruciating twinge blocked the breath in his throat.

His gaze dropped to the silver blade of the knife that had penetrated his side, the handle of that knife was clasped in the small hands of the woman who only hours before was under him in his bed.

Now there was shock and surprise on his face, he watched the girl wordlessly before his eyes narrowed in pain.

Y/N, whose face was transfigured with anger, watched the boy take deep breaths, as if he was used to those kinds of blows, and that pissed her off more.

She had waited all night for that moment, she didn't want to hit him while he was unconscious, she wanted him to be lucid and awake so she could hear him scream, but he wasn't screaming, he didn't look scared, and that made her angrier. She wanted Jimin, for once, to show that he was human and not just a crazed kidnapper and heartless killer.

"Why don't you scream, why?! Fuck!" she shouted before pulling out the blade with a revolting sound, then sticking it again in a spot not far from the previous one, Jimin jerked it away from himself, holding tightly to a shelf to prevent himself from collapsing to the ground, gritting his teeth to try not to scream, he pressed his hand on the first wound, not daring to pull the knife out of the second one. Had he done so, he would only have caused more damage.

He squatted slowly on the floor, pale and unable to think of a solution; there was already sweat on his upper lip to testify to what was going on inside him.

He tried to reason lucidly without losing sight of Y/N, who looked like a lion locked in a cage, paced around the living room holding her head in her slimy bloodstained hands, crying and shaking to herself, he forced himself to keep calm because in that condition he would only hurt them both.

"Y/N, where did you get this knife?" he hissed between his teeth breathing hard, she didn't answer but there was really no need for her to, the man had recognized him, it was part of the set he used during the missions, "Never mind, now be a good girl and hand me the phone" he was shaking, his body couldn't handle that condition yet and he seriously needed help, he had to call Seokjin and get help sent, immediately.

But Y/N stared at him fearfully, if she called his teammates they would surely kill her, Hoseok's threat was still alive in her mind and she began to shake her head.

"The phone is in my room, Y/N...fuck, go get the phone!" he blurted out moaning breathlessly, in response the girl began to run to the front door.

But no, she couldn't know the security code, right?

Jimin's brain threw a warning bell when he heard the typical sound that signaled the apartment was open.

"Shit!" he threw all his good intentions to the wind, began to run after her heedless of the suffering he was subjecting his body to, found himself removing the knife from the wound, shrugging off the consequences, it was incredibly painful and slow to do so, but when he saw her go through the emergency exit he chased after her jumping up several steps at a time.

Y/N's vision was flooded with tears, she did not understand why Jimin had not reacted as she expected he would, he had not turned around screaming in pain, he had not railed at her, and that made her feel bad, made her feel like the monster of the situation.

She had stabbed a man in the back, no matter who he was, she had done it.

And now she was going to die, Jimin would never let her go unpunished, much less his friends, she was screwed in every sense of the word now.

She grabbed the doorknob of the exit, preparing to scream and call for help, but she never got as far as throwing it open.

Jimin was quicker, grabbed her by the hips lifting her off the floor, she screamed in shock as she was dragged away, back into the apartment.

The boy closed the door with a loud roar, but he did not let her go, he slumped to the floor with her still pressed against his body, Jimin's hot, labored breathing tickled her neck, he did not seem to be intent on punishing her, then she felt something wet her clothes, something that horrified her.

Jimin's blood was flowing copiously from his wounds, and despite the lack of a shirt she could not tell where it came from, the blood was so thick and plentiful that it covered the deep cuts.

"Y/N..." he said again, she clearly sensed the torment in his voice and if possible felt even worse, "I need your cooperation," he said bitterly.

The girl silently nodded after a few moments, Jimin closed his eyes, his complexion was increasingly ashen.

"My phone is on the bedside table, bring it to me," he let her go and she got up in pain, between running and the wild sexual intercourse she had a few hours earlier, she was not in a very good state, but she tried to be quick in retrieving the object in question. She could have called the police, asked for help and reported Jimin, but she did not think about those possibilities at all, what was wrong with her?

She felt like a horrible person, how had she become this way?

When she returned to Jimin she found him trying to hold his deep gashes to stem the flowing blood, his movements were getting slower and slower, but he reached for the phone, it took seconds too long to unlock the phone and find Jin's number, but when he did he was relieved.

"Jin," he called, licking his dry, purplish lips, "I have a problem," he coughed.

In the meantime, the woman hurriedly looked around, saw some tea towels in the kitchen and didn't think twice about picking them up, ran to the man who was continuing to talk to his boss and with trembling fingers pressed on the wounds firmly, causing Jimin to spasm, who immediately clenched his teeth. There was so much vermilion liquid that her head spun, she must have been crazy for doing such a thing, she did not kill people.

"... I lost a lot of it, yes... No, she is here with me," he was saying, and that made her blanch. It was over.

Her chest began to lower and rise more and more slowly, Y/N was witnessing the boy's condition and could do nothing, for either of them.

Fuck, she didn't know if Jimin would protect her, he would probably be the one to give the order to slaughter her, assuming he didn't keep the honor for himself, but dead Jimin was pretty much sure she would follow him immediately.

When the boy put down, he took to staring at her without saying a word, he was quiet, he wasn't ranting at her, he just seemed...surrendered.

"Why did you do that?" he asked weakly, she squared him with glazed eyes, "Why did you stab me?"

"You hurt me," she said with a knot in her throat, "Before, it was different... you were like him," she sobbed, leaving Jimin strangled and confused .

What had he done and who was "him"?

Jimin tried to remember his actions, he had come home drunk, this was clear to both of them, and he was angry, very angry.

Suddenly he remembered everything, frowned.

He had... he had....

Why did he feel so bad at the thought of what he had done? After all, this was not the first time, he had done it before, he was interested in feeling pleasure, and he had even punished her, she deserved it! But looking at those tear-filled eyes, it wasn't just the wounds that cut off his breath. Perhaps death was fucking with his brain.

"Y/N..." he seemed to want to tell her something important, perhaps it was about his last breath, but-

"Jimin! Jimin!" tense and nervous voices interrupted that moment full of unexpressed feelings, Y/N turned toward the men dressed in black who with weapons in hand began to check the whole apartment, some she recognized, she had already seen them in the company of the boy.

Other men ran to attend to him, beginning to check his vitals and oxygen, strong, angry hands pulled her away from the man and she found herself screaming in fear.

"It was you, right! Fucking-"

"Hoseok, let her go immediately!" exclaimed Jimin as he pushed one of the doctors aside, his pale, tired face glowering at the man behind the girl's back, "Do you hear me?" he huffed furiously, Hoseok tightened his grip on her, hurting her.

"What do you want me to do then? We can't leave her so fucking unpunished!"

"Lock her in her room," ordered Jimin with a cold stare, Y/N whitened, "She is not to come out of there, just as no one is to enter her room until I return, understood?"

The grip on her shoulders vanished, but another made her get up in a rush, the woman saw Jimin being carried away by the medics, while someone else slammed her violently inside her room, she fell ruefully to the floor and held her arm in pain.

She cast a glance at the culprit and recognized him as Taehyung. He seemed beside himself.

"If I don't kill you now it's only because Jimin doesn't want to, but don't expect mercy from us," he spat, distraught at the image of his friend reduced to that condition.

He slammed the door behind him and the lock was heard to close.

It was really over.

#yandere jimin x reader #bts x reader #jimin fic #jimin fiction #jimin imagine #jimin ff #bts fanfic #bts #bts fanfiction #jimin smut #bts smut #yandere bts smut #bts yandere smut #yandere bts #yandere bts x reader #bts x you #jimin x you #bts dark fanfiction #bts smut yandere #bts yandere #bts x y/n #jimin x y/n #yandere jimin x y/n #seokjin fanfic #namjoon fanfic #yoongi fanfic #hoseok fanfic #jimin fanfic #taehyung fanfic #jungkook fanfic

[mak3itr7ght]

Pair: Park Jimin x fem!reader (Coraline and the secret door AU)

Words count: 5.278

TW: mention of blood.

Music suggestion:

Y/n's pov :

'Here we are, Y/n! This is the place where your father and I have met! The Pink Palace...’

As soon as I got out of our car, the grandeur of this huge house overwhelms me. It looks like a very old... and creepy building but, to be honest, I like this. It’s not that I’m a goth or something but I’m into this kind of vibe, just enjoying it without being fully part of it. My family and I will stay here for the two upcoming weeks, and I really prefer to stay here, in this mysterious, greyish-looking place, instead of spending our vacation on an exotic beach, smelling of suncream. That’s not for me. That’s not for Y/n Lovat.

I like the sea, i like walking there at night, when there’s no one else but me and myself, getting lost into quietness and into the sound of the waves. I enjoy being alone and I don’t feel bad for this. Sometimes solitude heals.

Anyway!

I can’t wait to explore the house. My parents have told me some stories…they told me about an alternative world, you can have access in It only through a little door, and it looks like that, that door, is right among these walls. But that world is filled with bad things, they said, and then they just tried to reassure me by specifying that that world wasn’t real; that it isn’t real. They don’t know that i could feel sadder if i actually find out that it is really all fictional…eheh so I must find out if I should be sad or not.

Once I enter in the house, I immediately start to look around, searching for hints when my mother’s voice interrupts me.

‘I know what you’re thinking about. You won’t find it, because, as we said, it doesn’t exist. Got it?’

Sometimes, Mom and her sixth sense scare me. But her words don’t stop me from my investigation. Still, when this topic comes out, in her eyes, I always spot a veil of agitation, like she’s hiding something from me and I’m sure that Dad knows about it. But it doesn’t change my mind at all, I’m the kind of person who needs physical proof to consider something real or fake.

During evening

The right moment came: Mom went to shopping, and the supermarket is quite far from here, Dad is doing a visit to some neighbors, two old women, he told me, so I’m sure that they will keep my Dad enough busy with their chatting, along with tea and cookies. I have the whole house free, for at least two hours. It’s time to get in action. Let’s start upstairs. I look around, searching behind the paintings and analyzing carefully each room. Nothing. I’m walking across the hallway when suddenly I trip onto something. It is a floorboard slightly raised. They told me the house was restructured, still, there’s the risk to get injuries around! I stand up, massaging my hip, the one that hit the ground. While tripping, I removed completely the floorboard and I notice that, in the whole it was covering, there is a small dusty trunk. I take it. It looks like there was a lock or something, but it was already removed. Mh.. strange, but maybe it’s just the metal that got consumed by the humidity.

I open it, curious about knowing its content. There’s.. a doll, with buttons as eyes, it has short, bright blue, hair, pale skin and it’s wearing a…a yellow raincoat, it looks strangely familiar…ù

Mom…

In the living room, there’s this picture. She is with the grands, she was young at the time, and they were posing in front of this house, and she was wearing the same raincoat…

I feel chill along my spine…well, right, mom loves to sew, so, maybe she made this doll backtime. That’s it. Anyway, I decide to keep it in my room, in my closet. I’ll keep searching for the door tomorrow.

After two hours, my parents return home, we have dinner and then straight to bed. I try to fall asleep, however, a continuous sensation of being observed keeps me awake, I turn towards the window and I see a black shape... with two bright yellow eyes...

I jump, wondering what that thing is, when the moonlight illuminates it showing me that there’s no reason to be scared. It is just a cat, a black cat. I try to look at it with more focus, and I spot, next to the cat... the doll...the same doll I locked in my closet, under the pile of clothes I still have to fold.. what is it doing out there??

The cat, suddenly, does a little nod with its head, ‘telling’ me to follow it... and, like the dumbass I am, I decide to listen to my curiosity instead of my common sense, following it.

Silently, I manage to leave the house, but, not so easily, since as soon as I leave the room, I get caught by my mother, I, astutely, tell her that I am only going to get a glass of water, but I also know that she would go to check, as soon as she will see the kitchen light go off, so I simulated my steps and the creaking of a door and then I  ran out; in my bed, when my mother will go to check, there will be bulge under the covers, and she will go to sleep, not caring that what she will see, won’t be her dear sleeping daughter, but just pillows...

I reach the cat, which is waiting for me under the window of my room. It starts running and I keep following it... it takes me to a hill not too far from the house, where there is a water well, very old and probably unused. Next to it, there is a white napkin, which seems to wrap something... the cat looks right at it as if it wants to tell me "Go and see what's there for you", thus, again putting aside my common sense, I check what this napkin wraps.

Some sewing needles... and... a key...

a key... keys open things, right? Like…the trunks.. the padlocks or... THE DOORS! THEN IT EXISTS! IT EXISTS AND I WILL FIND IT!

I return home full of enthusiasm, hoping that the morning will arrive quickly.

The morning

'Are you sure you don't want to come with us? Aren't you afraid of being alone in this new house for more than 2 hours?'

Dad asks, I admit he seems to exude some concern. But, despite this, I nod with confidence, trying to reassure him and my mother, they are going in town to do some duties or stuff like that.

'I'll come next time! Promise!'

I state, to try to speed up the conversation.

'be careful, Y/n'

Mom seems quite strange, she also seems to be a little worried…but oh well, it will be the influx of memories she is receiving, since she spent her childhood here.

As soon as I make sure my parents' car leaves the driveway, I start to find the door…I wish that black cat would help me with this too...

And, as if it had heard me, here it appears, outside the kitchen window, this time. Wow. That’s incredible.

I let him in, and my cat, Ginger, immediately gets on defensive... actually it has never gotten along with cats similar to it, rather it has always preferred dogs... strange, right?

But even stranger is what I’m just seeing, with one look, the black cat managed to make Ginger calm down... I'm starting to think that this cat isn't just any normal stray cat...

I return to reality seeing the feline pass before my eyes, heading towards the dining room and stopping near a white wall..

'Mh... that’s not helping... surely the door I'm looking for can't be th-... what if...'

What if it's behind this wall?

I look better at that marble wall, and, there was a lighter part, compared to the rest... it means that the cement, in that area, was placed later...

But now a big problem arises... how can I remove this layer of concrete in just a few hours?

I try to think of a plan, when I see the black cat scratching on the white patch... pff poor thing, does it think that can scrape off such a hard material? I turn around for an instant, hearing a meow from Ginger, and then I turn towards the wall... and the door pops up out of nowhere, the door I was looking for so much... the concrete has disappeared into thin air, there isn't even any a speck on the ground...

It is as certain as anything that this cat has some supernatural power... I approach the small door, it's small, but if I bend down, I could fit in just fine. I take the key out of the pocket of my skinny jeans and slowly insert it into the door lock.. with the same slowness, I turn it.. until I hear a click..

Oh yes.. here it is.. it's open. Ginger and the black cat keep watching me. I hesitate for a moment... I turn towards the two cats once again, and the black cat has disappeared... probably its daily task is done. I turn towards the door, take a sigh and open it.

..

...

....

Jimin's POV:

The moon this evening seems to shine more than usual, and the apples on this tree seem to have a different red... a bloody red, my favorite color. Their taste, sweet and a little sour, like the lies that a mother tells her child, for his own good.. sweet…and a little sour…I hear a rustling coming from the hedge next to me, and, after a few seconds, my dearest friend comes out from that pile of green leaves…

'My friend, Black, tell me... what brings you here now? I thought you were busy with that favor I asked you a while ago...'

'Don't worry, Jimin, the time…has come. she's coming here, to you…'

A huge smile appears on my face, there are those who would say it's madness, but in reality, all I feel now is pure joy…

'Thank you, my dear friend, I knew I could count on your help.'

I stated, stroking the shiny, black-as-night fur of my dear friend, my only friend. It didn't even have a name... when I found him wandering around these lands, he seemed to know where he was, and yet, he didn't have a destination, he was there, with that proud look... like every being of his kind.

One day, however, I approached him, we talked for a long time, and what I took from that conversation was that, although he always kept his ears pointed and his muzzle high, there was a veil of loneliness in him, just like me... after my dear mother was taken away from me... by the one my friend thought was her friend... that blue-haired witch.

Luckily, I managed to open what were the blue eyes of my furry friend, making him really see who that was... Coraline... and so, in exchange for my friendship, I asked him for a favor...

When I learned of my mother's death, everything I thought about and still thinking about, It’s, actually, I wouldn't even call it revenge.. I just want to settle the score with her…by taking away from her…what she cares about the most.

I look into the garden pond, and I see her reflection, what will lead to Coraline's eternal suffering..

Her dear daughter. Y/n Lovet.

…

…

…

Y/n's Pov:

I can't believe my eyes...so does it really exist? In front of me, stands what appears to be a long distorted tunnel…

I wonder…what's at the end of it.

I start to walk, when suddenly I hear the voices of my parents, intent on taking out of the car the bags full of gifts and souvenirs to bring to the rest of the family…I panic for a moment... I immediately close the door and hide the key in my pocket again.

I look around, hoping to find something that can cover the hole in the wall where the door is, but when I turn towards it, I see that... the layer of concrete has returned to hide it. Maybe I'm going crazy? Until recently, there was only a hole in the wall and not even a bit of dust on the ground, but now everything is back to how it was before...

A small smile of disbelief escapes me at the thought...

I run towards the front door, intent on helping my parents with all the envelopes.

'How are you dear?? You look a bit strange?'

'Have you done anything in our absence?'

My parents continue to observe me... perhaps because I'm still a little shaken by the latest events. But now... I simply think, or rather, I ask myself, why did my parents want to keep that world hidden from me?

Maybe they really don't know anything about it and the fact that it actually exists is just a perfect coincidence.

Pff… I can believe in anything, but coincidences, I really don't.

I spend the day ruminating on what happened this morning... and I just hope that night falls soon so I can finally discover what lies beyond the tunnel.

At dusk, my parents invite me for a walk near the house and, near an apple tree, I see a puddle, which is strange. It has never rained in those days. I look out to observe my reflection, but my face resting on the water, it's almost disturbing... I jump, noticing that instead of my eyes I seem to have... buttons?

I walk away, running towards my parents, scared, to the point of not being able to tell what I saw. Back in the house, I immediately run towards the mirror in my room, and my reflection seems to have returned to normal... it must have been an oversight...

Once night falls, I make sure that my parents are totally immersed in their dreams, and I head towards the wall where the door is located... but here a problem arises... without the black cat... how can I scratch off the cement?

Hmm… maybe if I close my eyes and wish to see the door... okay, it probably won't work, but there's no harm in trying.. I close my eyes, count to 13, open my eyes, and to my surprise, there it is, the little door. I open the door again, and there it is again the dark blue tunnel, I give myself courage and cross it, slowly. I find myself in front of another small door and I slowly move it, not too much... Who knows, there might be something behind it...

I lean forward a little to observe, but what I see leaves me quite disappointed… It is the same room I left from, my living room, there is nothing different...It must have all been a joke, probably.

I enter the room, close the door, and decide to go back to bed, but on my way to the stairs, I spot the black cat outside the window beckoning me to follow him again and so I do.

Following the mysterious feline, I realize that the garden is different from usual... In front of us, then, stands an arch that leads towards a small lake, over which a bridge has been built... I've never seen it...

Around the lake, there are apple trees planted, already ripe, which is strange… I know that apples ripen during autumn, not in summer…

The cat climbs onto the bridge, jumping onto the ledge of this, where, there is a figure, leaning against it, seems a male figure, a long-limbed, elegant male figure...

Will it be a neighbor? At this time of night?

I approach slowly...

“Hello…Y/N, it's nice to meet you.”

I stop walking.

“h-how do you know my name?”

"I'm the son of a dear friend of your parents, it has sense that I know you."

So, he knows my parents... This reassures me. I lean forward to observe him, and when he turns, I am taken aback. He has... Buttons instead of eyes...Out of surprise, I lean on the handrail of the bridge, which however breaks.

I close my eyes to prepare for the impact but, before I end up in the water, I feel something pull me up and hold me. I open my eyes, and I see that face with delicate features, but almost ruined, by those gadgets on his eyes, so close to mine.

Where am I?

Am I really at home?

Regaining my balance, I move slightly...

"I know what you're thinking…These aren't exactly nice to look at, are they?"

She says pointing to the buttons.

I observe him, without responding, confused but also a little struck by compassion…

"don't feel bad, I was born like this…"

My confusion increases. And the boy probably understands this.

"You know you're not in your world right?.. This is very similar to yours but more beautiful.. Don't you think?"

He turns, observing the moon, which shone a slightly more different silver, from our real satellite.. Indeed, looking around, it feels better here.

"It means that my parents knew about this world.."

I think out loud. The boy turns to me and nods.

"Indeed.. But after my mother's death, they denied its existence."

I can hardly believe that my parents have denied this place... Why did they speak so badly about it? Why did they always tell me not to come here?

"but.. now you're here! Right? Will you keep me company for a bit, at least until dawn?"

The boy looks at me, smiling softly.

In the end.. I want to know more about this place, so I nod and smile back.

The boy takes me for a walk in this immense garden, full of flowers and sculptures made with hedges.

There is a certain musicality in the air.

"shall we Dance?"

I laugh

"I don't know how to dance, unfortunately, I would just make a fool of myself"

"it means that I will be the one to teach you"

I've always been a little reluctant when it comes to guys, I've already told you about my concept of loneliness, right?

Yet, with him it's different, he puts his hand around my hip, the one on which I think there is still the bruise from the other day, and his other hand delicately takes mine, we start dancing, I think it's a waltz or something like that. I'm just following his movements, looking into his eyes, or should I say, buttons.

"You like being alone too, don't you?"

I nod, lowering my gaze slightly.

"When you are alone, you feel better, sometimes, you have time to think and to improve yourself"

I keep listening to him in silence, while we keep dancing, I knew that I was not the only one who felt good alone, but it needed me to visit a parallel world to find that someone...

Thinking that I'm not that wrong or that strange makes me smile.

"Now that I think about it, you know my name, but I don't know yours.."

I say, lifting my head slightly.

"My name is Jimin, mi lady."

"Now are you even calling me mi lady?"

I laugh.

"you said you couldn't dance, yet you seem to have always been doing it, you look like a princess, a Lady"

He winks at me.

Generally, I hate this kind of attention, he's shamelessly flirting... And, unlike usual, I like it.

This boy, Jimin, if I'm not mistaken, has something special, it must be that he comes from this world..

We dance almost all night.

The first lights of dawn are already starting to appear...

'I should go.. '

'wait a little longer, please'

I do so, deciding to stay some more time with him, continuing to look at the sun which was now emerging on the horizon.

'Will you come visit me again?'

I spent one of the most beautiful nights of my life, how could I not come back here, I found a person who understands me… A special person. I nod but then I realize that it's really time to go before my parents find me. I immediately run away to where the little door is and I quickly run to my bed, a few minutes later I hear my mother come through the door… I take a sigh, just in time…

Jimin's POV

'she took the bait like a fish on a hook eh eh'

'you're absolutely right, Black… It was easier than I thought, I imagined Coraline's daughter to be tougher'

I say playing with a hair I pulled out of Y/N’s head.

'but she's cute, come on…'

'don't tell me you really meant those things you said to her?'

I turn to Black, nodding.

'it's a shame that she has to end up bad, but for now, I'll have fun with her' I smirk.

Let's see what she is doing now…

I lean towards the pond to see the image of Y/N, she is changing... Which makes me blush a lot…and that doesn’t suit me at all.

I make the image disappear from the pond and start to go back into the house…

'You have taken the color of your beloved apples'

Black tells me, laughing..

'shout up, you silly cat'

Y/N's pov

The days pass, Jimin and I now see each other every single evening, we dance the waltz and then we stop to watch the sunrise. He knows everything about me, and I know everything about him, or almost, sometimes he's so mysterious. He also gave me a pair of needle-shaped earrings. They are original, which is why I like them a lot. I would like to tell my parents about him, but Jimin told me several times not to do so, to avoid a possible "strange" reaction on their part. Maybe seeing Jimin would have reminded them of a dear friend, and this would have saddened them. So we decided to keep this "friendship" in secret, even though I can't understand whether he is really in love with me or not.

One evening

While having dinner with my parents, I notice that something is  bothering them. I look at them with confusion trying to understand what they were thinking. At a certain point, mom turns to me.

'you've been weird for a while..'

My confused expression deepens.

'You know.. We found this in your room..'

My mother shows me the doll I found that week before, before I discovered the door. I try to find an excuse...

'oh.. That? Ah yes, I found it just yesterday, upstairs haha you sewed it, right?'

'Y/N… We burned this doll'

My eyes widen. What do they mean they burned the doll? So.. Who recreated it..

'Those earrings'

I hear my father whisper that phrase, almost scared. I check my earlobes, and I notice that it's true, this time I forgot to remove my earrings..

'Wait.. I can explain-'

''Y/N! I told you not to look for the door!'

'You told me it didn't exist. And then... Even if it existed... What would be wrong with that? You told me so many of those lies, about monstrous creatures, just because they have buttons instead of eyes, what makes you think those creatures are really wrong??'

' Y/N.. Tell me where the door is.'

'never.'

'Right now!'

Mom definitely has no good intentions, I don't understand her, Jimin is so good in the end, he understands me, and I'm sure his mother was like that too..

'You had a friend in that place. And you abandoned her son out of selfishness.'

My parents look shocked.

'Who told you this? Who is this friend-... oh no.. '

Mom leans towards me, probably to assert me. I move away and run towards the door, which is open.  Arrived in the other dimension, I turn and see the small walled-up door..

I turn around to find Jimin right behind me..

'What's going on, princess?'

I hug him. Scared and confused more than ever.

'My parents saw these'

Pointing to the earrings.

I see Jimin's face darken.

'I think I can imagine the rest..'

He almost seems to be... smiling.

At a certain point, she hugs me, squeezing me... I can hardly breathe.

'J-Jimin.. I can't breathe'

'Now.. you are with me, I will protect you..'

Black's pov

I think Jimin's plan is failing miserably.. I saw how he looks at that girl and he didn't seem like he was faking it.. Well, in the end he isn't that different from humans. I lie down on the branch of my favorite tree, but I can't fall asleep, I feel watched.

'Jimin was always wrong'

I turn, noticing Ginger, Y/n's cat.

'Oh then you talk.. I thought you were mute..'

'Nice...come on, let's go save Y/N'

I ignore her, poor naive kitten. She is naive but stubborn to the point that she makes me fall from my beloved branch. Luckily, we cats always land on our paws.

'Girl, have you lost your mind?'

I look at her, sitting proudly on the spot from where I fell.

'And yet you let yourself be deceived by that demon..Jimin is not your friend. He just wants to avenge his mother, the woman who killed three innocent children and who also wanted to kill Y/N's mother. You yourself helped Coraline..'

'Tsk.. yet Coraline left, never thinking of taking me with her.. Jimin instead welcomed me and was always by my side'

Ginger comes down from the tree and stands right in front of me.

'When he kills Y/n, you will no longer exist for him'

The coldness with which she said that sentence made my blood run cold. Yet I almost feel like she's telling the truth. Now that I think about it... Jimin always behaved strangely..I sigh…feeling betrayed for the umpteenth time.

'Let's go save your friend'

Ginger widens her eyes in surprise, but I can see a minimum of joy in those green bulbs. As fast as we can, we arrive in the other world... just in time....

Jimin's Pov

How beautiful. Thanks to Coraline and that owl Wybie, this innocent little fish ended up in my net. I continue to hold Y/n, not too much to kill her.. you know.. I changed the plan.. I want to keep her here with me, forever. She will be my queen, but to become one.. these beautiful eyes will have to be replaced.. I caress the girl's cheeks..

'Do you want to become my queen?..'

I say approaching her..

The moonlight is illuminating us, as if we were under a spotlight.

Y/n's pov

Jimin's proposal appeals to me a lot... I almost feel as if something is hypnotizing me…Something pleasant. I close my eyes, continuing to look at him, to look at those plump, pink and soft lips. I feel his breath approaching my face, and something touch my needle-shaped earring.. But before that distance between us could disappear... something awakens me from that trans-state...

Jimin's Pov

'Let that girl go right now'

Just as I'm about to sew up my princess's eyes, I am interrupted by a rather irritating voice. I turn around, furious, seeing Black....and another cat..

'What's the matter, my friend, have you also met your soulmate and has love just made you crazy? Come on let me do what I have to do..and go for a walk with your kitten..'

'You..kind of profiteering devil'

The two cats are preparing to jump on me..But Y/n shields me.. and the claws of the two cats.. hit her eyes.... I feel the pain, so much so that I feel my heart shatter.

For me... she gave up her beautiful eyes... for me... without even my hypnosis..

'Leave him alone.'

The girl shouts.

'He's innocent, why are you mad at him, all of you, he's alone... and he doesn't deserve it. He is misunderstood, and he just needs someone who understands him...please...get out of here and leave us alone. You two, and my parents...and everyone else.'

After saying this, I see Y/n collapse on the ground, holding her hands over her face, bleeding. The two cats seem mortified , especially the ginger one…it almost seems to cry.. then, at the bottom of the garden, right at the entrance, I hear sobs..

They are Coraline and Wybe.

I don't know how they got in, but it's like I can't move…

I crawl towards Y/n and rest my head on her shoulder while I wrap my arms around her waist...Below us there was now a blur, with the color of the apples from that tree right in front of us.

'Please, Jimin, save her..'

I hear Coraline's voice, broken..

'I'll save her, but she'll have to stay here with me... I'll have to sew her the buttons... it's the only way to keep her alive.'

Coraline and Wybe, through tears, nod..

I was a fool.. I believed from the beginning that they were the bad guys.. and yet.. the sacrifice of Y/n, of my Y/n, and the fact that her parents, after all, asked for help from me.. it makes me understand.. that maybe I did everything wrong in my life.. that I shouldn't have hung on to revenge, that it would have been better to forgive.. and maybe now Y/n would still have her beautiful eyes..

While I'm sewing on her buttons, a tear falls... yes... because under my buttons, I have eyes... it was the one I thought was my mother who sewed them on for me.. as soon as I finish, I take Y/n and hold her to me, still sleeping..

'You will be fine now...sorry, my princess'

I whisper to her.

Then my gaze turns towards her parents and the two cats, destroyed by their mistake.

'She's alive, she's healthy, she'll even be able to see again. But she will have to keep these forever..To apologize...I will create a bigger door in that house, and you can come here to see her whenever you want...in the end, this world is the same as yours. Wherever you go, that door will follow you so that you will always be able to see it.'

The couple looks at me in amazement…I don't blame them at all. I stand up, lifting Y/n bridal style.

'Y/n's right.. you're different'

'Thank you very much and take care of her, always..'

I turn towards them, bowing my head in thanks. In reality, I wasn't that different, it was Y/n, who opened my eyes.

Two days later

Y/n's pov

I wake up from what seemed to be an eternal sleep... I look around, and getting up, I remember what happened...I jump up to look at myself in the mirror and...yes...now I have buttons where my eyes should be.

'I'm sorry, princess. It was the only way to save you'

I turn towards the voice, it was Jimin, behind him were my parents, along with Ginger and Black. I give them a smile.

'Modestly...they suit me'

I laugh and then jump on the boy.

'Am I wrong or before anyone interrupted us, we were doing something very serious'

I say literally closing the door in my parents' faces.

And then I kiss him..

I've wanted to do this for a long time, and it's cooler than I thought. Especially because now I can be with him... in the world that perhaps suits me better.

#bts au fanfic #bts fanfic #bts #bts x reader #bts au masterlist #bts disney au #bts x fem!reader #bts x y/n #bts x you #jimin #jimin x reader #jimin au #halloween ff #bts halloween #neil gaiman #coraline and the secret door #jimin x you #jimin ff #Spotify

[kiara-ish]

In Poetry

Pairing: Jimin x Fem!reader

Genre: Angst, High School AU

Rating: nc17

Summary: You have always been a distant observer, another face in the crowd, when it came to Park Jimin. Until you finally realise that he was never as far as you thought.

Warnings: angst, high school bullying, fighting, toxic friendships, more bullying, coerced joint suicide, breakdowns in parental relationships, fire, pyromania.

Word count: 3.5k (approx.)

a/n: This is a part of what I wanted to be a birthday spree posting but ended up being a rather lone post. But nonetheless, here is In Poetry.

Also, immensely thankful to Freya @floralkive for this cover and again, Freya @sugarwithtea for beta-ing this mess that I handed over to her. Thank you so much and hugs!

Tagging: @apotatomashedbybts

but does it really make sense?

when I walks by your pen stills

and your lips fall agape;

you stare until I'm gone –

there's no way to escape

from this trance that you're in.

but does it really make sense?

When the class ended, you took the neatly stacked papers with scribbles for writing and shoved them far away from the eyes of your classmates. You were just in time too because moments later, a body was slammed loudly against your desk and you shut your eyes tight. Gasps and squeals passed around the classroom and hushed murmurs followed suit.

"Oh, sorry, you are not hurt right?"

"You're crazy, Dong-su. Why are you disturbing the lady? Don't mind him, please, he's a moron-"

"Hey, watch your mouth you-"

You opened your eyes to see the person who had been thrown against your desk slowly trying to stand up again. You knew his face but couldn't recall his name, not like he needed it that much; the rest of the school would just call him Dong-su's victim for the rest of whatever time period he had in his fate.

You watched Dong-su and his lackeys fool around among themselves before fixating on the boy who was slowly trying to move away again. Before they could snatch him up again, you moved out of your desk to join the rest of the class in scurrying away from the abusive hands.

It wasn't fun to watch the boy get pulled up by his collar and thrown into the lockers but maybe it was the slow poison of habit that made your eyes remain calm in the atrocities. It made you feel like a shitty person every night when you turned towards the dirty window by your bed yet it was the nagging reiteration of 'what could I do?' that made you make peace with the storming conflicts that raged in your heart. Because really, what could you do?

Harboring the secrecy of a sin didn't spare you from being a sinner, you knew that more than anyone. God forbid the Church becomes agreeable once in a while. But it was the light of one torch that attracted a thousand others until they could light up the dark cavern of negligence. You could place a thousand arguments back and forth until a third sense made you aware that you always fall back to square one, always.

"Woah, he is really studying in all this?"

"Not the class president for nothing."

It was the murmur of a discussion that made you follow their gazes until it fell on the first desk by the window. Throttling sunlight poured in through the open window and one couldn't tell from his cool that it was late June and the rest of the class wanted to lick a glacier. He had always been that way; a murmur of astonishment only when spotted.

Park Jimin always remained unbothered about the stares he got every once in a while. His duties as Class President were always fulfilled with admirable dedication yet unmistakably vague approaches. You couldn't tell if he did it because he wanted to do it or because he had to do it. Either way he was the model student no one wanted to be, not at all.

A shout of a teacher from the corridor had the class settling back down but Dong-su and his goons were gone with the boy. You sent a wish of luck silently and reminded yourself that there was nothing else to do.

it wasn't always like this��

I wasn't always a fool

it was a quest for gold

but I was miner of greed

it was the shine of peace

that I saw in you, but

it wasn't always like this.

"You lied to me, deliberately, while I'm still here asking you why."

You picked at the corners of your cuticle where the flesh was soft like it wanted to come off. Aware that someone who called you her best friend was speaking, you never looked up. Why meet their eyes when you can't meet yours?

Soo Ah called your name again, tapping her knuckles on your desk. You knew she was trying to keep herself calm and was on the verge of breaking, "Why are you not answering? Why didn't you tell me he was cheating on me?"

Why didn't you, really? What stopped you? Every time you asked yourself that, your mind broke into conflicted opinions and delved so far into it until your head started to hurt. But now that she was asking you, to your face, your mind was empty.

"I'm hurt. I feel like I am being torn apart every moment and you were supposed to be my friend," she was crying again and your hands itched to do something, anything for her. But you came up empty-handed. The corner of the cuticle of your thumb was bleeding.

"You haven't said a word this entire time. The guilt must be getting to you," she smiled cruelly or at least tried to; in her eyes still loitered her innate kindness as she continued, "You are not a bad person. I know that more than anyone. A bad person isn't aware of their faults. But you are trying and that makes me have hope."

She pushed back her chair and stood up while you didn't even try to move your eyes from the smoothie she was leaving untouched, "You can only be a friend to someone, if you are a friend to your own conscience first."

The feeling of despair and hopelessness even in a crowd was something you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy. The feeling was suffocating and you wanted to run after her, get on your knees and beg — beg for her forgiveness, beg for a chance to be her friend, beg for a chance to be wanted. But your body was way too numb to stand, let alone walk away. You tend to be weak like that and maybe that's why you never got a head start in all your apologies. If you had gotten one, would it have made you more wanted?

There was a familiar figure entering through the glass doors. A hoodie was thrown over his peeking school uniform. Head angled towards the ground, you didn't know why you wanted to meet his eyes. You didn't know why you were looking at him at all. Park Jimin could go wherever he wanted and that was none of your business. So why was the urge to pull back his hood and look at him becoming so insatiable?

By the time he was settling at the table far from the window, your legs felt steadier. Letting the smoothies remain as a memento of incomplete conversations, you sprinted after Soo Ah, aware that you were farther from her than before but you would beg on your knees and apologise until you couldn't breath. You would kneel again and again, be so pitiful that she would have mercy on you and pull you up, both of you knowing that it was just a matter of time before there would come a repetition.

and you were always so far,

the farthest from me.

the moon, your twin

this damp earth, mine.

could it really have been changed?

maybe if we were meant to be

it could really have changed.

"Have you heard? Lee Dong Su is being investigated," Soo Ah settled in front of you, visibly brightening the table with her presence. Even the bland lunch seemed better with her.

While everyone shook their heads no, you joined them. When all eyes patiently waited for her to elaborate, you looked away– you knew the school gossip before her, once again and you didn't tell her, once again.

"Apparently Kang Bok Su—"

"Who's that?"

"The guy who was recently Dong Su's victim!"

"Oh!"

"Well, I heard he retaliated and went to the police with a recording."

Collective gasps went around the table. You widened your eyes to join their film of reactions. Soo Ah looked satisfied with the reactions and it made you breathe a sigh of relief. Watching the table break into chatter again, you tried your best to keep your focus on what was being said until your eyes met a familiar figure.

His back was to you, a small booklet by his tray. Kim Taehyung, Jimin's good friend, was the only one with him, even with the other chairs empty. The sight angered you. You didn't know why even though it made you want to stride to him, grab a handful of the softness of his hair and just… just make him look at you; at least once.

You stared until your eyes met Taehyung's instead and the both of you looked away like it singed you. Would he tell Jimin that you were looking? You couldn't have that happening so even without an appetite, you stuffed lunch like a starved woman and laughed loud at the humourless jokes. You didn't look at him for the rest of the day.

there's a ring of fire around me, but

the flames don't touch me.

they don't let you come closer,

to only light in your darkening world.

so can you take a risk?

cross over knowing it'll burn, come closer–

tell me you want to take a risk.

"Please, mother–"

The sound of your knees hitting the ground only echoed in your mind as your mother threw out old pictures and albums from the dark depths of the ancient cupboard.

"Mother, please, don't do this. Please, please, please–"

You felt it before you saw it, a shard of glass gliding over your cheek from the photo frame she threw before you. The stutter of your kneecaps made your fragile attempt at standing up fail miserable as you watched your mother grab everything: every album, every photo and every last of his clothes in her shaking hands.

You always started a breath later so when you stumbled down the stairs after your mother disappeared, you were hearing a hysterical cry that sounded so akin to yours.

There was a fire in the backyard. The flames rose higher than the house, awfully close to the wooden shed where your father used to work. He wasn't in there, nor in your life but was that enough to burn down his remnants?

You heard your mother laugh as she threw in the clothes and pictures and albums, following each with a squeal of joy. You watched with numb limbs until you saw her approach you with a smile that made you want to run, walk, crawl away from her, farther than your father. Your own cruelty made you stand still.

"My precious little girl," a warm hand cupped your face and you saw a woman you've never seen before, "My darling daughter, we're so close to freedom, aren't we?"

She giggled and you gagged, there was a hurricane in your guts and it made you cave within yourself but your mother was having none of it, "No, no, my lovely. Don't slouch, be a good, strong girl for Mama, okay?"

She pulled you by your hand, pointing to the dark sky, "Look at the stars! Oh, so beautiful, aren't they?"

There wasn't a star in sight and you clenched your fist but she was looking at the sky so blissfully, you followed her vision for the sake of some semblance of serenity.

"Twenty five years of hell with him and I was quiet, wasn't I? I let him apologise for letting me step over the broken glass of his bottles because he was too drunk to pick them up. I let him come home later and later and prepared him a lavish lunch, knowing that looking at me made him lose his appetite."

"Ma-"

"I told everyone he was a closed off person but he… I told them that he- that he loved me, didn't I?"

It wasn't until the heat of the fire began to get scalding that you noticed how close to the fire you were, your mother closer. Your mother was still staring at the sky with a smile, leading you closer and closer to the fire. The fumes burned your nostrils and it made you tug at her arm, calling for her again and again.

"My little girl," your mother looked at you with that smile and held your shoulders, "A life is only worth living, if the living makes you feel alive. If everyday feels like death, you don't have to fear death at all."

Her eyes shifted to the huge flames now while you tugged at her grip, screaming to let go, trying to pull her away but it was all in vain.

"Let's go, my little girl. Let's step into peace-"

The next moments were a blur. You got surrounded by a white smoke that withered the flames. Loud sirens rang in your ears and arms pulled you away from your thrashing and shrieking mother. Her frantic, dark eyes were all you saw before a greater darkness took over your vision.

Sitting in the ambulance with multiple voices being targeted at you, it took a while to recall what had happened. There was a car with tinted windows far from the ambulance and the cops held the door open as your mother, handcuffed, was led into it. Familiar faces crowded around and their murmurs droned in your ears. You watched until they closed the door behind her.

"Do you have a relative or another guardian you can stay with for now?"

Maybe because the proximity of the question was closer or maybe the reality of it was clearer, you shook your head in negative but before the officer would ask another question, you heard a familiar voice, "She has! I'm her father."

You didn't look at him when he signed on papers for all you could keep your eyes on was the familiar silhouette that you keep seeing everywhere. Park Jimin had no business with you yet wherever you stalled, he was like a shadowing cloud.

can I hate you because of what was not?

they say you need to know of love

before you go for love

so do I reek of hate

now that all I do is hate?

I'm still stuck in this circle

I should hate you 'cause of what was not.

Soo Ah was scared of you. Everyone always said you had your mother's eyes and that was appealing until she was jailed and sent to asylum. You wondered why you moved on quickly. Your father's girlfriend ignored you like your father did your mother. Maybe it all had something to do with that insanity.

They didn't necessarily ostracize you, per se. It was all the empty desks around you and the group arguments that took place when the only seat available was next to you. They didn't tell you they hate you, per se.

"Hey, Park Jimin!"

You didn't look up at him anymore, not even when his name was called. Your eyes didn't go to him anymore. But Dong Su's voice echoed through the hallways and the loudness of it, made you flinch your head up.

Murmurs filled the room but none that you could perceive. As it appeared, you couldn't get up and stand amongst them anymore so you remained seated, watching Lee Dong Su barge in alone, striding towards an unaware Jimin. The song playing in his ears had to be exceptionally loud… well not anymore.

You blinked when he threw Jimin against the wall, ripping his earpods off and throwing his book out of the window, "You wanna play the hero, aye? You're gonna record videos for the wussy, huh?"

Gasps of shock went around the classroom. It was news to you, who's always listening to the shadows, that it was Jimin who did that.

Dong Su leaned in and whispered something close to Jimin's ears and a breath of silence passed before maniacally Jimin was lunging at Dong Su. Screams erupted from everywhere making your head buzz from the shrillness of it.

Jimin's attempt was lame. In seconds, he was on the floor and Dong Su was beating the life out of him, so near to you. You wondered if there was murmuring about you too since you refused to endorse in the horror even when a loud crack sounded. For a change, Dong Su wailed out in pain holding his fist while Jimin tried to slowly sit up, bruised black and blue.

Teachers barged in when the show was already over and took them both away, all the while you felt awfully at peace. Maybe they really weren't wrong about the insanity that lingers in your eyes.

I tried all I could

to despise you with all I have

but I was naive in my thoughts;

I didn't know what it was like.

what I thought was hate

turned my life all around and now

I don't need to try at all, it's all I can do.

You didn't know you had never heard him speak. You didn't know how soft his voice was and how every word sounded like a melody. You didn't know the timbre of his vocals could make goosebumps line your skin until you heard him.

Way past school hours when you climbed through the stairs of an under construction building, walking through the framework of doors until the mid summer night air was caressing the weights on your shoulders, you didn't expect to hear him; or hear anyone at that but especially not him.

"You can catch more colds in summer than in winter."

He was sitting on the edge of the unfenced roof of the ten story building. His lips and nose were still bleeding and one of his eyes was swollen shut. His shirt was torn at places and the tie hung loose from his neck. Jimin's eyes remained on the lights that dotted the town and the streets, the views that went as far as miles and more.

The chill of the cement seeped through your clothes when you settled beside him, shoulders touching his. It should have felt strange and thrown you off — sitting next to a person you have never spoken to before, that too so incredibly close. But for some reason that might have lingered in the familiar dark sky, you felt as if more than anyone, through everything, Jimin was with you.

He was cradling a leg close to his chest while the other was spread out before him. On the expanse of his thighs, you placed your handkerchief. You couldn't meet his eyes but you knew he was staring at you, maybe in question, maybe in surprise.

"Blow the blood out from your nose. Can't be that fun to breathe in that metallic stench."

The white of your handkerchief contrasted the dark of his pants so in your periphery you saw when he picked it up, heard him blow his nose before you spoke again, "Don't you feel lonely?"

You could have elaborated a lot more but you waited, letting his mind turn gears and dish out the well marinated intelligence that he harbors.

"Do you?"

"Don't answer my question with a question. Ever."

You didn't know where that dominating tone was coming from. You had never heard it from yourself. But neither had you heard the soft chuckle that Jimin let out so you allowed your mind to shut down for the time.

"If you sounded even half as original as you did now, maybe you didn't have to beg to everyone to know-"

"Shut the fuck up."

"Make me, then."

You stood up, breathing heavily. Jimin stood up too, a light limb in his step but a prominently infuriating smile on his lips.

"All your life," he spat out blood on the floor making you cringe, "all you've done is beg. Beg for forgiveness, beg for people to stay, beg for your life-"

He let you push him into the wall and wrap your fingers around the base of his dainty throat, "How do you know all of this? How do you-"

"You think you're the only one watching me? You think I can't feel your eyes digging into my back everywhere I go?"

You stepped back in disbelief, "You are always everywhere I go, even in my neighborhood. I saw you that day!"

Your mind couldn't comprehend the situation as it was so when Jimin picked up his bag and made a move to leave, you pulled back his arm in desperation.

"Tell me," he turned to you as if he was waiting for you to do that, "Tell me, why were you there? In front of my house? At the cafe? Why?"

Brushing off your hand from his arm, he sighed and spoke in a whisper, "Why can't you just let it be fate? Or just coincidence if you want? Because I didn't know, either. I was just there and so were you."

He looked at you with pity before slowly walking away, your handkerchief hanging out of his pocket. You didn't know you had called out his name until he stopped and turned to you again.

"Can you," you had no idea what you were mumbling, "Can you keep being where I am, by fate or coincidence?"

remember when I asked you

if it really made sense?

it does, a lot, now that the

the answer was in me.

I was looking at a dry well

when searching for a frog.

if I had just looked beside me

I would see the answer to all.

#bts #bts fanfic #bts fic #bts x reader #park jimin #jimin fanfic #jimin x reader #jimin #bts jimin #jimin fic #jimin ff #btshoneyhive #btswritersclub

[myg-butterfly]

Good Morning (It's Now Tomorrow)

Part 1 - Goodnight (Love)

Jimin x Reader (Spy!Au) Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Two-Shot (Refer to Part 1 Above), Misunderstandings, Happy Endings.

Taglist: @fairypjiminie , @pjmsies

Summary: Your partnered mission with Park Jimin doesn't exactly go as planned, and you can't tell if it's for better or for worse. Your friend, Jungkook, is leaning towards the "worse" side, and consequently, you are too. How can Jimin fix this if he doesn't know what changed in the first place? Or: Jimin was doing fine, then he met you.

Warnings: ANGST !!! Miscommunication, jealousy, yearning, anxiety, insecurities, Yeonjun is kinda a shithead here (SORRY I WAS LISTENING TO DEVIL BY THE WINDOW AND I NEEDED AN ANTAGONIST), overprotective Jungkook, implied (???) NamJin, kisses !!!

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A/N: Hi hello hey!!! Sorry this took forever, I had it all laid out but I've been running around like crazy everywhere and I hadn't had time to finish it. Here it is though! I hope this lives up to any expectations you may have had for the continuation of "Goodnight Love". The title (and the chapter overall) is inspired by Matt Maltese's album "Good Morning It's Now Tomorrow" and there's a reference from one of his songs in the summary jeje. Anyways, enjoy!!! Don't be a silent reader PLS 🙏

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A good night's sleep was highly unfamiliar to you. Which is why you considered that maybe you were still dreaming when you woke up this morning. Everything around you is comfortably warm: the sun softly hitting your face, the sheets soft on your skin, the arms wrapped securely around yo–

The arms wrapped securely around you?!

You tense a bit before all the memories of your previous day resurface.

"You're safe, okay?” Jimin's voice was soft, feeling the way his chest vibrates against your head that's now tucked under it only helped calm you further.

Everything around you felt warm and tender, lulling you into deep sleep.

The last thing your brain manages to process is a soft kiss on your forehead, and words that sound a lot like: "Goodnight, love."

Part of you knows that you should probably get up, that you shouldn't be letting yourself enjoy this, but opening your eyes and finding Jimin so closely – the thought of pulling away tugs at your chest.

You're not sure how long you spend silently memorizing the lines on his face before you feel him shift and turn.

This is your cue to hide, pretend to be asleep, or something, how embarrassing would it be if he caught you staring–

"Hi, Y/N. I know you're up."

Oh my god you're busted. You're gonna die of embarrassment, and the raspiness in Jimin's voice is not helping you whatsoever.

Knowing you can't hide from him any longer, you shyly peek out from his chest.

"How did you know I was awake?"

Jimin smiles at you before responding to your question.

"You tensed up for a while. And I can also feel you burning holes into my face with your stare."

Your feel your face burning from the embarrassment of being caught, and it gets impossibly hotter when Jimin pushes a strand of hair off your face.

He chuckles at your flustered state before pulling you back into him.

"You sleep well?"

You don't push him away when he tugs you even closer, instead you just nod your head yes at his question.

You truly did sleep well — probably the best sleep you've gotten in a really long time.

Waking up like this, it felt easy. Things have never been simple for you, but this, this feels simple, natural. Easy.

You like this side of Jimin. A lot.

Suddenly, you become aware of the sunlight filling up your room and remember that you're gonna have to get up and leave soon.

"Jimin?" You try to leave his embrace but he only pulls you into him again with a tired groan.

"We have to get up." You try and fail again.

"Just a few more minutes." Realizing that there's no fighting him on this, you decide to give in and get comfortable.

Neither you or Jimin want to acknowledge the feelings behind your want to stay like this as long as time allowed you to.

After a few moments, you reluctantly begin to untangle yourself from his embrace. The whine that leaves Jimin stops you in your tracks - why would he want to keep holding you?

You shake your head and refocus on the fact that you have to get up.

"Jimin, we really do have to get going now."

"But it's so comfy."

This guy was going to be the death of you.

"Come on, get up. I'll make breakfast and you pack."

A long sigh leaves his lips before he unwraps himself from you and sits up to stretch. The cold that greets you as Jimin's embrace leaves makes your heart fall uncomfortably, but its just because you want to keep sleeping. That's why. Mhm.

The rest of the morning goes smoothly, and you both try to ignore how warm your hearts feel at the domesticity of it all.

The car ride held the same softness, and it had you thinking that maybe it wasn't the hotel, or the mission, maybe this softness was growing between you and Jimin on its own, independent to circumstances.

Jimin hummed quietly as he drove, and you tapped along with your fingers.

Decidedly, you spoke up:

"Jimin?"

"Hm?"

"Can you do me a favor?"

"What can I do for you princess?"

"Can you um- maybe not tell anyone about what happened at the event? Y'know, with the guy?"

Jimin frowns at the implication that he would purposely go around sharing something so personal about you, but again, he understands that he's in no position to question you. It's not like he hasn't given you a reason to doubt him.

"Of course, don't worry about that."

"Thanks."

"I know we got off on the wrong foot but, I wouldn't do that to you."

You smile at him tenderly because you know, and he smiles back because he knows you know.

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Once you arrive back at your designated building, you report to Seokjin and Namjoon right away.

They go over the files and any other information you two gathered while there.

"Great work guys. See, I knew you 2 would make one hell of a duo."

Namjoon's smile is radiant as he talks to you, and it draws out one of your own.

You don't notice how Jimin stops to look at you, his lips curving upward and his eyes sparkling; this is the first time he's seen you this happy.

Jin and Namjoon do catch it though, and they share a knowing look - something more had happened on that weekend, and whatever it was, it brought you two together.

"All right well you guys can go back to work. Nothing too heavy, just reformat some codes we missed over the weekend. Take your lunch whenever you want, and if you want to go home early just stop by and let us know that you're leaving."

"Thank you."

"No need. You both have worked really hard, if we weren't behind I'd basically force you two to go back home and rest."

You leave the office feeling satisfied; being reassured that you did a good job made you feel much lighter about everything that had happened.

"Well, I guess we gotta get working."

Jimin strikes up conversation, and it's a little awkward, but he finds it all the more endearing.

"Yeah."

"Oh, Y/N. I was wondering if you wanted to have lunch together? Today? Like at 12? It's okay if you don't want to, I mean, I know we just spent like 3 days stuck together but-"

"12 sounds good. I'll meet you at your office?"

"Yeah. Okay, yeah! See you then."

So much for being smooth, Jimin.

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"Y/N! Hey!"

You turn around to see a happy Jungkook making his way towards you.

He was like your activation key for energy, having been friends for about a year now helped you grow comfortable around him, enough to show how you were feeling.

"Hi Jungkook!"

"What's got you in such a cheery mood?"

"How do you know that I'm in a cheery mood?"
You challenge him.

"You were practically skipping to your office. It's obvious you're giddy about something."

"Oh, I'm just glad the mission went well. It's good to be back."

Jungkook smiled at your cheery mood, but you could tell he wanted to say something – he's never been good at hiding his facial expressions.

"You look a bit constipated, Kook. What's up?"

"Oh, nothing, I'll tell you later."

Your narrow your eyes at him, he knows you hate when people do the whole 'we'll talk later' thing.

"Seokjin and Namjoon told me I could take it easy today, I have time. Now, spill."

He sighs before turning to walk to his office, "come on."

He closes the door behind you and takes a seat on the couch in the room, motioning for you to sit with him.

"So, your mission went well?"

"Yeah, it did. I mean, it was rough in the beginning but we made it work."

"You and Jimin, are you like ... friends now?"

The way Jungkook is staring at you makes you feel as though you're a kid again, about to he told off by your parents over something that had excited you.

"Yeah, I guess you could say that. He actually asked me to have lunch with him today. I think once you break through his shell he's actually a really sweet guy."

Jungkook swears he saw your eyes sparkle when you mentioned having lunch with Jimin, and that only made his frown grow.

"Y/N, I don't want to pop your balloons but, I'm pretty sure Jimin's been spreading shit about you and how the mission went."

You feel the air leave your lungs in one go as you process his words, Jimin's doing what?

"No offense Jungkook but, how do you know that? He wouldn't do that. He promised it stayed between us."

A sigh leaves his lips and you refuse to let yourself falter; Jimin wouldn't do that.

"Was there anyone else from our company with you guys?"

"No. Why?"

"There's word going around that you pussied out of the mission and Jimin had to save both of your asses last minute, basically saying he did all the work and you just sat and watched."

For the second time in the span of a few minutes, you felt like the oxygen was sucked out of your lungs.

"Well, those are just rumors, right? We don't know if it was him who said those things."

"People have been mentioning the files and Jimin having to get you from inside the building because you couldn't do it. Who else would have all of that information?"

Oh.

"Well that's not what happened. He can spread all the rumors he wants because we both know that they're not true. Namjoon and Seokjin do too."

Jungkook shoots you a concerned look - you're taking this too well and it's throwing him off.

"So you're okay? You don't want to report it or anything?"

"Nah I'm good, it's not worth entertaining."

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Jimin feels as though he might go insane waiting for you during his lunch break.

He'd gone from one extreme to the other trying to figure out why you haven't shown up.

Were you okay? Did something happen? Did you decide to blow him off? Maybe asking you to lunch was a mistake-

No. Jimin thinks. I am not going to assume the worst. I'll just call her.

He smiles to himself while thinking what a good idea that was.

When he calls you, he's not sure what hurts his ears more: the rapid beating of his heart, or the continuous ringing as you don't pick up the phone.

The line cuts off and his stomach sinks as he realizes that you hung up.

But Jimin knew better than to get ahead of himself, obviously.

So he decided that he'll just swing by your office.

On his way there, he can't help the jitters that shake through his body. He's trying to keep his brain from creating the worst case scenarios, but he's not sure he's succeeding.

The ring of the elevator shakes Jimin out of his thoughts and back onto the task at hand, but not before he runs into someone.

As he's about to apologize, but the man (who he now recognizes as Jungkook) is already walking away before he can even begin.

He knew you guys were friends and he hated that he knew that he probably knew where you were.

"Oh- Hi, sorry to bother, Jungkook right?"

Jungkook simply replies with a curt nod and moves to continue walking before Jimin interrupts him again.

"Um- do you happen to know if Y/N is in her office?"

He stops again in his tracks, but this time he sends a challenging look towards Jimin.

"Why do you ask?"

"Oh I just- we were supposed to meet up during our lunch break and she didn't show up. So I just wanted to check if she was okay."

"She's fine, you can go back to your own thing now."

"Oh is she busy? I can come back later the-"

Jungkook puts up a hand to stop Jimin's rambling, and for a second, stares him down.

"Look, I know you've been spreading rumors about Y/N and taking all the credit for your recent case, and she knows it too. So if you have any dignity left in you, I suggest you turn around and leave her alone and stop running your goddamn mouth. Do you hear me?"

Jimin feels his mouth go dry at the information that's just been laid out to him.

Someone was spreading rumors about you? And you thought it was him?

"I haven't spread anything though? I haven't even told anyone what went down except Namjoon and Seokjin and only because I'm required to. I don't know who told you that and who's been spreading shit but I would never do that to Y/N."

A bitter chuckle escapes Jungkook's lips, and if Jimin wasn't so caught up with the worry of you thinking he would do something like that, he'd probably cuss him out for it.

"You're more of an asshole than I thought. You can't even own up to your immature games."

"I just told you, I didn't do anyth-"

"I'm only gonna say it one more time. Turn your ass around and walk the fuck away before I do something rash."

Knowing that arguing with Jungkook won't get him anywhere, Jimin puts his hands in the air to signal his leave.

"Fine. But I know that I'm telling the truth. And Y/N will too."

Jimin spends a few moments (like 3 hours) debating back and forth whether he should text you or not.

Finally, he flips a coin.

The coin says yes.

———

Jimin: hey, can we talk?

Jimin: preferably in person, i need to clear some things up

✔️ Seen

———

Ouch.

It's at this point that Jimin knows he absolutely needs to find who spread those lies about you, and he needs to do it now.

Was there someone at the event that he didn't see but they saw them?

Did someone overhear the meeting you both had with your bosses?

But both of you were so careful with every little detail. How could have anything slipped?

Jimin paces around the room desperately trying to figure out what might've happened, when he remembers one thing he did amidst the panic:

Yeonjun. Jimin told him what was happening.

Oh shit.

But, would he do something like that? He doesn't seem like the type to stoop so low.

But it's a possibility, which means Jimin is at least one step closer to finding the root of the rumors.

———

Jimin: Yeonjun, hey

When you're not busy can we meet up

Yeonjun: yeah of course

I'll be done with work in about an hour

Jimin: cool cool

Meet me at the cafe across the street from the company building

Yeonjun: okay see you soon

✔️ Seen

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚　˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

Jimin has downed two entire cups of coffee while waiting for Yeonjun.

The more he thinks about it, the more it makes sense that he's the one that said something. (It also makes him angrier, if he wasn't taking deep breaths he's sure he would've broken the mug in his grip by now).

Just as he's debating whether or not a 3rd cup would make things worse, the bell of the cafe rings and he looks up to see Yeonjun walking towards him.

"Hey Jimin! Good to see ya! How's it going?"

"Hi, good, look I have some questions and I need you to be completely honest."

Jimin knows it's rude to just brush over formalities but he's frankly too bothered to care.

"You know the case I just came back from? The one with Y/N?"

"With the old dude and the files?"

"Yeah."

"Yeah. Why?"

"Did you say anything? Even any little detail?"

Yeonjun pauses for a moment, as if trying to make memory before he continues.

"Hm, I don't think I really said anything except when I talked to Leah. You know the one with curly hair in my floor? The one who has a huge crush on you? Yeah, her."

Deep breaths Jimin. You can't fight someone younger than you, and on your team.

"What exactly did you tell her?"

"She asked me if I had heard from you about how the mission went, and I told her that you were back and that I was checking in from the main building. She asked me how it went and I told her that it went well for you, but not so much for Y/N."

"What do you mean 'not so much for Y/N'?"

"I gassed you up dude. Told her how Y/N was too scared to just talk to some old man and you had to step in and do all the work."

"You said what?"

"That Y/N was too sca-"

"I heard you the first time, dipshit. Why the hell would you say that?"

"Well that's what happened isn't it?"

"No! Y/N wasn't 'too scared' she was in fucking danger! I couldn't just leave her there."

"All she had to do was flirt with a guy long enough to get into his room, how is that dangerous?"

Jimin was seeing red at this point. He's sure that if it were possible, smoke would be blowing out of his ears and nose. He couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"You're fucking kidding me, right?"

"I thought you didn't like Y/N. What's the big deal?"

Jimin absolutely couldn't stomach the words coming out of Yeonjun's mouth. He couldn't.

"What's the big deal? You wanna know what the big deal is? I don't know what Leah understood from your little gossip session but word got out that Y/N 'can't do her job' and I had to do everything for her. People are spreading rumors and talking shit. And even worse, she thinks that I started it."

Both men stare at each other before Jimin's anger reignites, and he continues on:

"Y/N did more than enough, she was so fucking brave out there. That old man that she 'just had to flirt with' fucking assaulted her. God knows what else would've happened if I hadn't gone up there. You give her so much shit but I know damn well that you don't have even an ounce of the willpower she has."

The tension at Jimin's words was piercing; harsh and sudden, taking the breath out of Yeonjun's chest.

"I- I didn't know..."

"No, you didn't. But you still ran your mouth, and now she's hurt and there's gossip running around the office. And it's your job to clean the shit you made up."

Yeonjun can only swallow the knot in his throat and nod as he waits for his next words.

"You have to apologize to her and tell her what you did. Personally. And if not, I'll just tell Namjoon and Seokjin myself, and the consequences will follow accordingly. Up to you."

As he finished his speech he began to stand up, signaling that he had gotten the last word; but before he can leave, Yeonjun's voice stops him.

"I'll talk to her. I promise."

Jimin pauses and turns around for a brief second and says, "Good. Let this be a learning experience. I know it was one for me."

And with that he turns around to leave.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚　˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

You were still really hurt and upset, and knowing this, Jungkook invited you to stay over at his place, understanding that being alone in your state was a terrible idea.

Jungkook was soft and kind, a model of a good friend, and you were grateful, you really were.

But even as he made sure you were comfortable, asking what you needed and if you wanted anything, you couldn't help but wish it was Jimin taking care of you again, holding you to sleep so you can rest and let go of all your worries. Protecting you from the man in your nightmares and anyone who may try to harm you.

But he wasn't Jimin, Jimin doesn't like you, he made up shit just to make you look bad.

"Y/N? Hey, what's wrong?"

You didn't realize you'd started crying until you felt the couch dip next to you, your friend leaning towards you.

"I'm still so scared, Jungkook."

"Of what?"

"He was there. On the mission. He was there."

"Who was there?"

"Do you remember where I told you I was before I moved here?"

"In the house?"

"Yeah. He was there. From the house."

"Shit." This leaves Jungkook's mouth with a hiss.

"I'm going to kill him for making you go in there."

Quick to stop Jungkook's growing anger, you argue.

"I didn't tell him anything so it's not like he knew or did it on purpose."

You pause for a moment to recollect your thoughts before continuing.

"The reason why I'm upset about what happened with Jimin is because,,, for a moment I thought he cared."

Jungkook gives you the signal to keep talking with a nod of his head.

"When things started to get out of control, he went up to get me. He didn't even think about it."

"What do you mean?"

"He could've left me there by myself, or he could've just found a way to stop him and then not mention it but he took care of me. He was so kind and gentle. He washed my hair and he calmed me when I was panicking and he waited until I was asleep to sleep too, it felt like he genuinely cared."

This shocked Jungkook – there was practically no one that managed to calm you down when you were in panic, not even him. So hearing that Jimin, out of all people, was able to still your worries, had him rethinking the entirety of the circumstances.

After a beat of silence, you speak again. Maybe for yourself, Jungkook thinks, because your next words are uttered quietly;

"I feel so stupid for thinking he actually cared about me."

Jungkook, suddenly remembering the interaction he had with Jimin earlier that day, blurts out words without thinking.

"He was looking for you today. Jimin."

You turn to him with wide eyes, and he guesses that if he already started talking, he might as well finish.

"Near the end of lunch he was looking for you. I ran into him by the elevator. He asked me if I knew where you were."

Jimin asked for you?

"And what did you tell him?"

"That it was none of his business. He didn't let it go that easily though. Said he was worried about you because you didn't show up to lunch with him or something."

Jimin was worried? About you? He was waiting for you to show up to lunch?

"Anyway I told him off, it was pissing me off that he was acting so innocent."

"How did you tell him off?"

"Basically I told him that I knew he was spreading shit about you and that he should fuck off. He kept swearing that he didn't know anything and I gotta give it to him, he's one hell of an actor. Teared up and everything."

"But Jimin never tears up."

"I know. Which is why I'm saying; bro can act."

You sat on it for some moments before speaking again.

"Do you think its possible that maybe it wasn't him?"

Surprisingly, Jungkook actually thought about it before responding.

"Well I mean, who else could've done it?"

"I don't know"

Yeah, exactly. I know you wanna have faith in him but-"

"Its just weird to me."

"I know."

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚　˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

Jimin was losing any hope he had left that you'd be willing to talk to him. No matter how much he tried, he just couldn't get a hold on you.

You, on the other hand: wouldn't say you were avoiding Jimin, just more or less calculating your schedule to minimize any possible interactions.

No, you're clearly avoiding him.

You'd started showing up earlier to work so you could be safe in your office by the time Jimin usually got there, and you'd leave a little bit later than usual so you didn't have to run into him on your way out.

To make things even harder on him, Jungkook could basically be considered your bodyguard with how he was always trailing next to you.

It isn't until Jungkook noticeably leads you the other way when you're about to pass each other in the hallway that Jimin realizes that this is practically how it was before.

Before this mission, he had absolutely no significance in your life except that you thought he hated you. Maybe he was wrong to think that things would be different when you returned. And he doesn't know if it's for the best, but he's sure that it's not how he wants to go on.

Two more days pass by and based on the way you're still avoiding Jimin as best as you can, he figures that Yeonjun probably hasn't talked to you. He's not sure how much longer he can keep waiting on him to talk to you.

At this point, he might as well just tell Namjoon and Seokjin himself. He knows this should be one of those moments where Yeonjun matures and owns up to his mistakes, but he can't bare the broken look on your face any longer.

He's decided: he sends Yeonjun a quick text, "you took too long" and makes his way to the main office, barely knocking before throwing open the door.

"Namjoon, Seokjin. There's something I'd like to report."

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚　˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

"And please, don't be too hard on Yeonjun. He's not a bad kid, he's just a bit careless at times."

"We'll keep that in mind. Thank you, Jimin."

"If it's okay, I'd like to take my leave early today."

"Of course. Have a good weekend, Min. Fighting!" Seokjin giggles at his last remark, and Namjoon sends him another glare. (All 3 men in the room know that Namjoon secretly loves when Jin makes comments like that, but they'll keep that hidden for now.)

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚　˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

You were sitting in your apartment watching the droplets run down your window, tracing the lines they leave with your finger.

Thinking back to the conversation your bosses had pulled you aside for earlier today before you went home, you didn't know how to feel.

You didn't even know that Yeonjun was overseeing your task. Did Jimin keep that from you on purpose? Did he think it didn't matter if you knew or not because of his doubts of you? Was this planned?

But then you think back to the times you'd seen him in the office, what Jungkook said, how he'd acted before, maybe this was all a big misunderstanding.

Suddenly, a glimpse of the conversation you had with Jungkook resurfaced:

— "He kept swearing that he didn't know anything and I gotta give it to him, he's one hell of an actor. Teared up and everything."

"But Jimin never tears up."

"I know. Which is why I'm saying; bro can act." —

It felt like the air was sucked out of you as it started to sink in that Jimin was probably being honest when he was talking to Jungkook. Jimin, one of the few people to show you genuine kindness and patience. Jimin, Jimin, Jimin. You had to talk to him. You had to.

Everything after your realization grows muddled together; strings of you calling Jimin frantically asking for his address and hanging up before he can even respond, you getting on your bike, somehow making it to his apartment in one piece, knocking on his door and–

"Jimin."

"Y/N?"

"I'm sorry-"

"What-"

"I'm so sorry-"

"Woah, hey, hey. Come in. You're soaked- Did you bike here? Wha-"

"It wasn't you."

Jimin's eyes soften — he knows what you're talking about.

"It wasn't me."

You let Jimin finish wrapping a towel around you until he steps back to continue speaking.

"I'm really sorry for accusing you of saying all those things without even asking you about it."

"You don't have to apolo-"

"But I do. I should've heard you out before flipping out and assuming you would do something like that to me."

"Its not like I haven't given you any reason to distrust me."

"But you've also given me reasons as to why I should trust you."

"It's okay, I'm not mad at you at all I promise. I'm sorry that you had to go through all of this."

"It's not your fault."

"It's not yours either."

A silence washes over both of you, and as you stare at each other you realize that you'd moved closer to each other to the point where you could almost feel Jimin's breath on you while you were talking.

The soft feeling from that night at the hotel begins to reappear, and Jimin cuts through the silence to let it in deeper.

"Can't believe you ran all the way here."

He gently moves a strand of wet hair out of your face, and you think if you were in a cartoon, you'd be able to see hearts flying over your head.

"I can't believe it either."

You both giggle before Jimin squeezes your shoulder and grabs you by the wrist and begins to walk.

"You're gonna get sick if you don't dry up."

"Do you really think my immune system is that weak-"

Ironically, you're cut off by a sneeze and you don't know if you're actually sick or if you really heard Jimin murmur a "cute" under his breath.

He leads you into what you assume is his room, and he lets go of your wrist only to go rummage through some drawers.

"Here are some clothes, uhm- I mean, you should change. So you don't get like, sick or anything. You can shower if you want, or you can just change your clothes- whatever works best."

You giggled at Jimin's nervous rambling, but you were equally as flustered when he handed you his clothes and you realized that you were in fact in Park Jimin's room and he was giving you his clothes to change into.

"Oh, uh- thanks. I'll be- I'm gonna go- do that."

"Yeah. Cool. Yeah."

Running into the bathroom and locking the door, you expected the swirling in your stomach to settle down, but when you saw yourself in the mirror, wearing Jimin's clothes, being overtaken by his smell, your butterflies came tenfold.

Get a grip, Y/N. What are you? A high schooler?

Again, Jimin wasn't any better than you were. You walked out of the bathroom and he could've sworn he saw the light of the universe before his eyes; his shirt looked so big on you, your hair was still wet and a soft blush covered your cheeks – you were gorgeous, and he was starstruck.

Finally snapping out of his speechlessness, he walks towards you and grabs a small strand of your hair.

"Your hair's still wet."

All you can do is nod: he is so close.

"You want me to dry your hair?"

"Yeah."

Now it wasn't just butterflies flying around in your belly, there were bees and hummingbirds buzzing in there as well; maybe that night wasn't just a one time thing, maybe you'd get to feel the gentleness of his hands flowing through you again.

"Come on."

He grabs a stool and walks back into the bathroom, and you follow.

It's almost funny – how natural everything feels. You sitting down while Jimin finds a brush and the hair drier, the way he cards his fingers through your hair, even the soft stares through the mirror, both of you blushing and looking away at any eye contact.

You almost fall asleep right then and there; how could a person you so new to you make you feel this safe? You're not sure, and Jimin isn't either, but you doubt it's a bad thing. It's not a bad thing at all.

"Not sure if it's too soon but I'd like to say that this hair thing might be our thing." Jimin says as he finishes drying and brushing your hair. You smile up at him and nod, and he's so close again.

"Hold on, you have one out of place." You think you might be becoming obsessed with the gentleness of Jimin's touch, or even just Jimin himself.

Jimin can't look away from you even if he tried. He's scared he'll cross a line that you aren't ready to cross over, so he's watching you carefully to see how you're reacting. He's convinced that seeing you like this is his new favorite sight; your eyes are droopy and your shoulders are slumped, you're leaning into him (are you even aware that you're doing that?), and it makes his chest swell with what might be a mix of pride and fondness. For you to feel safe enough to let your guard down, to forgive him even after everything, it makes even the colors of the room look brighter; you make everything brighter.

The room feels still – you swear that Jimin just looked at your lips. You know you've had your fair share of mind tricks, but for once, you don't think you've imagined this.

You know you aren't imagining this when Jimin's hand leaves your hair and trails from your cheek down to your chin: this is what you mean when you say you feel like you're becoming obsessed with Jimin's touch.

The way his thumb softly traces your bottom lip shakes you all the way to your knees, and, yep. He's looking at your lips. You want to blame it on instinct, the way you lean into him and look to his lips as well, but there is not instinct teaching you this. It's Jimin, your driving force. The driving force of the lick of his lips, the change in his eyes, his breath on your skin.

You always thought the movies were overly corny when they said that kissing someone felt like fireworks exploding or like bells ringing but now you think they were downplaying it.

Kissing Jimin makes you feel alive.

He feels that you're unsure, and he pulls away at the first sign of hesitation.

You have to stop a whimper from leaving your mouth at the loss of his on your own.

"Are you okay? With this, I mean." His voice sounds the same way it did that morning when he had just woken up and it makes you even more excited. So much so that you don't know what to do with your hands, so you clutch his shirt and move him closer to you while nodding.

Jimin doesn't think you notice that a whine actually leaves your lips, and it makes him chuckle before leaning back in. He would tease you just to get more sounds out of you but he's just as needy as you seem to be, surely even more.

This time you seem more sure, more intentional, but he still takes the lead. This time it is a bit funny, how in sync you are. His lips against yours, the push and pull of your bodies, it's intoxicating.

Suddenly the thought of having to go back home and being away from Jimin pops into your head and this time you do whine. You start to kiss him more urgently, and thankfully, he kisses you with the same hunger. You're standing now but your weight is almost entirely on him. His hands are firm on your waist and yours move to the back of his neck. It's dizzying, how electric this feels.

You're the one to pull away first, feeling breathless. Jimin understands, so he cups your face with both of his hands and internally he's fighting against the urge to squish your cheeks. Instead, he plants a kiss on your forehead then puts his forehead against yours.

"Stay the night?"

"Yeah.

You know you'll talk about it later. The misunderstandings and the kisses and the butterflies and bees, but for now being close to each other is enough. You have nighttime, and you have tomorrow, and time again and again.

For now, being close to each other is enough.

#jimin x reader #bts #bts ff #bts x y/n #park jimin #park jimin x reader #bts au #bts fic #bts fluff #jimin au #bts jimin #jimin fluff #jimin angst #jimin ff #jimin fanfic #bts imagine

[pjmbrat]

taste of you p.jm

warnings: f reader, fluff, comfort, smut, kissing!!, fingering, oral (f receiving), soft dom! jimin, praise, pet names r used, + wrote this kinda quick so i’m sorry for any mistakes!!

You kept trying and trying to get the move right, but you just couldn’t focus. Jimin had offered to stay at the studio after hours to help you, and you still couldn’t get it. Embarrassingly, you spun around again, frowning as you landed the jump, not on your feet, but on your ass instead. “I’m sorry.. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong..” you sighed out as tears welled up in your eyes, looking up at Jimin who was now making his way towards you.

He crouched down next to you, tilting his head to the side before giving you that pretty smile that would make anyone head over heels for him, “It’s okay, sweetheart, don’t cry. That’s what I’m here for, right?” he said, his sweet voice echoing through the empty studio. You couldn’t help but smile back, sitting up to give him a quick peck on his cherry chapstick lips.

“You’re so good to me, Jiminie.” you sniffled, wrapping your arms around him as you crawled into his lap. He kissed you back, placing his ring-clad hand on the side of your face, wiping away a few tears from your cheek with his thumb. “You deserve it, angel.” he said, holding you tight as he placed a small kiss under your eye. You hummed happily against him, enjoying the moment of peace you’re sharing together in the studio. He ran his fingers through your hair, letting his chin rest on top of your head. You wondered how you ever found such a sweet boy, you wondered how you ever deserved someone like him. Little did you know he was thinking the same things about you. He wondered if you knew how much he truly loves and adores every little thing you do, and how much it broke him to see you cry. He just wanted to make you feel happy all the time.

He looked down at you, placing his finger under your chin to make you look up at him, “Let me make you feel better.” he whispered. Your heart fluttered at his request, licking your lips as you stared eagerly into his alluring brown eyes. “Yes, please.” you said timidly. He brought you in for another kiss, letting his tongue swipe against your bottom lip as if to ask permission to let him inside. You mewled, feeling his tongue slip into your mouth, your own moving along with his in harmony. He spread your legs with his knee, bringing his hands down to your hips, “Grind on my thigh, baby.” he said breathlessly. You moaned into his mouth, rubbing your throbbing heat against his toned thigh, whining at the contact. “That’s it, baby, that’s it.” he groaned, letting his hands explore your torso. You bit your lip as you dragged your wet cunt back and forth across him, “Feels so good..” you managed to moan out. “Yeah? Feels good, pretty?” Jimin said in awe, watching as your body rocked across his thigh.

He bounced his thigh, licking his lips with a tilted head. You let out a gasp, moving faster against him as you felt yourself reaching your high, “Just like that, please..” you whimpered, your eyes glossy with lust. Jimin continued his movements, pulling you in for another searing kiss. You swore his lips were like an aphrodisiac, and the effects were kicking in immediately. You sobbed out, letting yourself go all over his thigh as he sucked on your tongue. He let you ride out your high, squeezing each side of your waist with his hands. “That feel good, baby?” he asked once you came back down. You could only nod in response as he maneuvered himself on top of you, laying between your legs with his head in between your thighs. “Can I taste you?” he asked, looking up at you. “Fuck, yes.” you said needily.

He pushed your dress up, leaving a few open mouthed kisses trailing down your stomach to your inner thigh. He licked a stripe up your clothed cunt, making you shudder. You tried to grind against his mouth, but he quickly stopped you, holding your legs apart with his strong arms. “Not yet, doll.” he whispered, placing a kiss over your clit. He finally slid your panties down, your wetness clinging to the fabric. Jimin wasted no time diving in, lapping at your clit as he moaned at the taste. “Oh, Jimin! please, feels so good.” you cried out in esctacy as his pretty, plump lips sucked on the bundle of nerves.

He continued sucking on your clit like a man starved, bringing two fingers to your pulsing hole. Jimin pushed them in slowly, curling them deep inside of you. “Right there!” you whined, grinding into his fingers. He was so good at pleasing you, so good at finding the places that made you so needy for him. He thrusted his fingers in and out of you, hitting your g-spot each time. “Cum in my mouth baby, wanna drink up every bit of you.” he moaned, sending vibrations through your body as you felt your orgasm wrecking you for the second time. You screamed his name, cumming all over his fingers and his lips. He sucked all of your juices off of his fingers, drinking up everything else that spilled out of you. He placed a kiss on your clit before pulling away.

“You taste so fucking good.”

#bts ff #jimin ff #fanfic #bts fic #bts fluff #bts angst #bts jimin #kpop smut #bts smut #taehyung smut #jin smut #jhope smut #jungkook smut #yoongi ff #jimin #jimin smut #bts jihope #suga bts #txt x reader #bts x reader #comfort fic #jiminie #park jimin #bts army #kpop fic #aesthetic #yoongi smut #bts fanfction #bts taehyung