#i already go to therapy anyway

[sandersgrey]

Painting "No One Knows Im Trans" on the back of my jacket while explaining to my sister that yea i know we live in the country that most kills trans people but if i die i die

#alex wont shut up #two things: #first im small and light skinned and look like im 12 #so people tend not to feel threatened by me #ive never had anyone be queerphobic to me in public #which leads to my second point: #im tired of waiting for the shoe to drop #poking hard at the sole #im in a position of privilege and ill use it to make the public a lil bit safer for other trans people #and if it shows where the limit lies #well #i already go to therapy anyway

[deafening-radio-silence]

I think that Dr. Christina "I was an excellent soldier" Raynor needs to deal with some personal things before she's anyone's therapist, because she strong-armed more of Bucky's autonomy away from him than Zemo did within the series.

#yeah man make amends for the shit that happened when you didn't even have control over your own thoughts #so she was giving him a way to “fix things” but that wasn't on him to do so #all she did was doubly reinforce what he already thinks - which is a justified but false and guilt-laden perception - about the situation #idk much about therapy but i don't think that they're sposed to do that. correct me if i'm wrong and then i'll go fight all therapists #bucky barnes #tfaws #alpine #my art #thank you for putting up with my drawings of a comic book character and his asshole cat lol #i had to put my dog down recently in a bad way and i can't rightfully get another house dog with my current work schedule #so i got a cat since they can handle being inside for the day and the shelter lady said she's super antisocial towards other cats #she's super antisocial towards me sometimes too but she sleeps on me at night and my house has never been cleaner #now that i have to vacuum cat fur and mind what i leave lying on the counter #i've never liked cats before but she's special i guess idk ain't everyone's cat special lol #anyway i'll stop using my tumblr blog as a blog now lol

[youremyonlyhope]

Living with Body Focused Repetitive Behaviors

Me: *Is super stressed over life.*

Trichotillomania: Time to pull some hair! C'mon. You won't even notice you're doing it. It'll make you feel better.

Me: NO. *Spends 4 days putting hair in a mini twist protective style* There.

Dermatillomania: Hey. Your hands are free. And restless. And dry... Pick your skin. Bleed. Bleed.

Me: Stop! *Starts up a new crochet project to keep hands busy.* Ok cool.

Onychophagia: Hi hi. Your nails are.... perfect biting length... you should do that.

Me: Noooooooooooo *Paints nails.*

Dermatillomania: Oh look, you got some nail polish on your skin. Pick it off... now pick some more...

Me: SDJAKFDSJFKLDKAFDJKLAFJDKSAKLFDASL

#is this tmi? oh well. this is the tmi website #trichotillomania #dermatillomania #onychophagia #bfrb #body focused repetitive behavior #ocd #guys guess what? my therapist all but prescribed that i get a manicure to prevent picking at my skin #apparently after a year with this therapist i never mentioned my finger picking until this week #and she was like 'ok since you find it tough to paint them yourself get a manicure. self care and preventative' #because my cuticles are horrific due to me constantly picking at them and the sides of my fingers #so i've always been too embarrassed to go to a nail salon and my therapist was like 'exposure therapy!' #currently my nails are sloppily painted because i can't hold a brush still and they're already chipping after like 5 days #actually they probably started chipping on the second day honestly. #i need to redo my twists a bit which actually satisfies the trich urges since i'll be running my fingers through my hair to do it #but i won't actually be pulling. but also. i will be getting the shed hairs out. so. kind of fulfills that. #but right now my nails are long enough for me to feel them sometimes hit my keyboard. which. isn't normal for me. #and despite the nail polish i feel the urge to bite them shorter ahhhhh #anyway if you're Black with natural hair and have trich i HIGHLY suggest mini twists since it helps deter me from pulling #sure i have to redo it every few weeks but seriously. game changer. harder to find individual hairs to pull.

[aroacettorney]

we talked a lot about how the incidents in delica absolutely broke ludger, but tbh, casey didnt come out of it unscathed either.

imagine how lonely you must have been to willingly travel to such a distant land just to see someone who was potentially like/similar to you. and when you thought you finally got a best friend who could understand you in a way that no one else could, they turned out to be something you would absolutely abhor with your entire existence. they gave no explanations. they bothered not with excuses. there wasnt even enough time for you to grieve what you just lost because they forced your hands to fight them in a death battle. without a word, they just simply vanished as if your friendship in the past few months meant absolutely nothing to them and you were left alone again, trying to navigate when and what went wrong all by yourself. there was a mix of burning hatred, betrayal, and sadness inside you, but there was no longer anyone for you to talk about it — no one that could understand it. you endured all those feelings for three years with no one to share while chasing after your old-best-friend-now-turned-archenemy for answers because they never gave you the closure you deserved.

even when you finally learned the truth, you realised that they had never trusted you nor your abilities enough to even consider working together. rather, they took on the most extreme measure and didnt hesitate to make you their biggest enemy all the while keeping all their troubles and pains to themselves. best friends, friends, friendly acquaintances, private detective and their client — it turned out that your relationship was neither of them. was it truly your one-sided assumption after all? or perhaps, was it because you failed them when you could have known better and done better? still wanting to keep believing that your companionship was once real, your guilt started gnawing on your conscience. not only you couldnt save them, but your inadequateness also doomed them to their worst fate possible.

then, the opportunity came. you finally mustered up all the courage to utter an apology. even though they acknowledged it, they made no intention to accept your peace offerings. they reminded, "our alliance is temporary". they stressed, "enemies are what we are destined to be". what a fool you were, trying to save a relationship that never existed. either that, or you had never truly been forgiven. they wanted nothing to do with you. they needed not saving by you. it wasnt a closure you wanted but its still a closure you got. in the end, you were left alone once more, with the knowledge of a possibility that you also might not be able to save them again this time.

#academy's undercover professor #academy's undercover professor spoilers #aro ludgercasey propaganda #selmore's undercover husband #casey selmore #this is caseys pov. to her ludgers true feeling is an enigma because he auto crits on deception. #ironically i think casey was/is much lonelier than ludger. #when she was bedridden for a month ludger seemed to be the only one who came for a visit??? (feral fans dont count) #what was marias even doing???? #ludger tends to think he is alone but he still has a lot of comrades openly caring for him. #even tho the delica incidents hit him hard he still at least had hans as his trusted emotional supporter. #meanwhile casey had to process everything by herself. there was no one holding her hands through it. #there is betty but i dont think she would be good at processing these complex and contradicting emotions that casey were having. #caseys going through the same thing ludger used to experience. the helpless feeling of not being able to save someone you most care about. #with the guilt eating her up under the right conditions she has the potential to become ludger 2.0. #personally i think the trigger would be ludgers self-delivered death. #it could break her for good considering how much guilt she already has over the delica incidents — the one event that changed everything. #anyway in conclusion casey also needs therapy. both of them need couple therapy.

[lesbiradshaw]

just started thinking about bradley as a teenager struggling with his emotions both pre and post his mother’s death/fall out with maverick but not wanting to reach out for help because a history of mental health problems can get you disqualified from enlisting in the service. happy saturday guys.

#that boy should have been in therapy from ages 2 on up like. #i def hc that carole took him to someone when he was younger but bradley probably stopped going once he was older and was given the choice #but like. idk. picturing carole trying to bring up him going back after she gets sick because she KNOWS he needs to talk to someone #and maverick cant be there all the time. but bradley says no because hes a teenager and hes started thinking about how to make himself + #appealing to the navy and that opens a whole other can of worms where carole sees that but doesnt want to deny him #because she can see hes already having a hard time with things as they are. #mav trying to convince him to go and bradley pointing out it’s hypocritical because maverick doesnt like talking about his feelings either #i just think people ignore his trauma So Much. they only pay attention to the maverick and goose bits #but they fail to consider how even before the maverick stuff happened bradley had a lot to deal with from a very young age #he spent most of his life on his own! he lost the people he loved most OVER and OVER… #the amount of trauma that must have come flooding back when phoenix (&bob but phoenix is clearly bradleys closest friend) had to eject #i think thats why people painting him as angry & agressive because of the scene where he yells at mav never sits right w me #that moment is so incredibly raw for both of them. bradley lashing out when hes just been triggered is not that surprising???? #anyways. #carolcore #bradley rooster bradshaw

[inkstainedhandswithrings]

TBB S2 EP 11: Metamorphosis

right from the get go already looks like cliché horror film intro (this initially made me dislike the ep, mainly bc we have too many bad horror films playing at the cinema where I work rn, but dw I came around)

the music was actually chillingly different than usually and continued into the scene in which Dr. Hamlock was introduced. I liked that, but in a bad way

the closeup on his hand confirms that the Zillo Beast ate it, no this is not up for discussion, Zillo Beast had himself a treat

I'm kinda coming around on Nala Se, ngl

Also for as uneasy Dr. Hamlock makes me, I feel like we're finally getting a high-quality villain on TBB and I'm here for it

BAD BATCH TELLING CID OFF BAD BATCH TELLING CID OFF BAD BATCH TELLING CID OFF

HUNTER WANTING TO CUT CID OFF HUNTER WANTING TO CUT CID OFF HUNTER WANTING TO CUT CID OFF

Cid, being a huge dick:

Me:🤨🤨🖕🖕🖕

I like watching Wrecker show off how smart he is. He knows all the weapons and how to use 'em. Yes. :D.

"Whatever did this wasn't human." <- I find that an interesting sentence, considering this is Star Wars. If this was a show that took place on earth, somewhere where it was unlikely for an animal to be, that line would've been chilling. In Star Wars? Not so much. Humans are only one of many species in that galaxy and while I do believe that clones = humans, via star wars lore, that doesn't apply. Clones are classified as their own species, meaning technically they aren't human. I'm probably over thinking this but whatever, the line struck me as oddly placed

"By yourself?" "Your concern is not warranted. I will be fine." <- ok, Tech ik you got the whole cool, logical, I-know-what-I'm-doing-vibe going on, but I gotta tell you, the person who says that in horror films dies first.

OFC THE MEDICAL EQUIPMENT IS KAMINOAN FCK

everytime tech checked what's going on in the hallway I yelled "nO" at him. and then he did it anyway. rude.

The second we first saw it I realised it was the Zillo. I've been wondering when/if it would ever come up again, since the Chancellor did order for it to be cloned when the og episodes aired and then we never saw it again, so the arc felt incomplete.

BUT I LOVED THE ZILLO BEAST ARC SO THIS MADE ME V HAPPY AND V SCARED AND I KNOW IT'S NOT CANON BUT CAN THE ZILLO BEAST PLS GO EAT PALPATINE NOW??? IT DESERVES A TREAT!!!!

Hunter grabbing Omega to protect her from the beast 🥺

Tech's slow "Fascinating." followed by his "Take cover."???? sir u already had me, u didn't need to go harder

Wrecker grabbing Omega to protect her from the explosion🥺

Tech casually causing the explosion

"It ate the crew?" MY POOR BABY

"I can help. I know my way around Kaminoan tech." hmmm omega tryna stay out of the fight? she scared? hmmm Tech whatcha do???

Omega being better with Kaminoan tech than Tech and him just going with it and trusting her expertise. Yes. :D

idk where the "Zillo Beast feeds on energy" thing came from bc that wasn't part of the original arc and kinda threw me off, but alright, they needed a reason for it to grow real fast, I'll take it

they're already fighting the beast and then the empire shows up hhhhhhhh whyyyyyyy

omega just casually pulling the plug on tech's research, I love her

Tech grabbing Omega to protect her from the explosion 2.0 🥺

yes, hello, I'd like to inform you all again that I hate the empire, thank you

Tech allowing Hunter to keep flying even though he is the designated pilot and clearly very skilled. Just shows how much he trusts his leader and brother to keep them save. Love that :))

When the Commandos began rounding up the villagers I immediately knew what it meant and GAH HONSLTY WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS

The Empire only destroyed Kamino to control cloning, not to end it, hm? surprise surprise (these fcking motherfckers i swear)

"Send the data to Echo and Rex. See what they can find out."

....

........

............

YES HUNTER YES SEND THEM THE DATA YES GO WORK WITH ECHO AND REX AND SAVE THE GALAXY YES LET'S GOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

end of the ep confirms yet again that Dr. Hamlock is a bag of dicks :)

Prime Minister said f you and I'm here for it

and then he brought up Omega and I was not here for it anymore

finally the music during the last shot makes me think that this facility is going to come up again and it will likely be very traumatic and horrible and terrible and um ya. sucks man.

gonna tag @jealous-sloth77 and @saturn-sends-hugs bc I'd love to see their thoughts too :))

#that was #such a wild ride #what in the goddamn #like im already paying for therapy I didn't need more reason to go #anyway #star wars #the bad batch #star wars the bad batch #sw #tbb #sw tbb #tbb hunter #tbb wrecker #tbb tech #tbb omega #tbb echo #captain rex #clones #tbb s2 #tbb s2 spoilers #tbb spoilers

[mirror-ralsei]

toby fox is so good at capturing the specific north-american late-milennial zeitgeist in incredibly obscure and poignant ways that i am genuinely scared for the emotional damages he will incur later. sir i was already eviscerated by "you are now too old to fit your fingers through the green rubbery park table grates" what more will you take from me

#noelle's typing style on her livejournalspacepress?? stop stop we're already dead!! #these are just the exposition chapters?? we have 5+ more sections of this?? auuuuuuauuuuuuwhaughhh #we are only getting sadder and sadder from here and i already cant handle it !!!!! #invoicing my therapy bill to royal sciences llc v_v #anyway... will make a post about nostalgia in deltarune one day it's really interesting #and could be the prevailing uhh moral? theme? the same way 'letting go' was for undertale

[daily-whistlepaw]

daily whistlepaw until ah becomes PoV day 1167

I think I finally understand how people feel when around a crush, can't say I enjoy it

#warrior cats #whistlepaw #windclan #medicine cat apprentice #this isn't my first crush lol but this one has had me feel the strongest of feelings (and might be my first genuine crush lol) #the fact I have been building up A Lot of stress for the entire week probably didn't help. #and the fact my stomach hurt is also probably at least partially to explain by the fact I barely ate last night #but MAN seeing my (latest) crush in such a pretty dress and then go on stage and play (a goddess!!!!!!! she's a goddess) #(I already bought tickets to go see the full thing; I will die but I will die happy (I hope)) #but yeah I struggled for a good 2 hours to fall asleep and also had stomach weirdness happening the next morning #man it was not fun #(and then she came to sit next to me during class and I had to play it cool (I was too deranged on sleep deprivation to really care about #being my typical brand of weird but I do sometimes feel like an idiot around her and feel guilty because then I fear that she finds me #annoying and will hate me and I will fail this again (losing a friendship over a crush once was not that fun lol) and Traumas don't help #either at all so uh I'm just trying to spend time with her I just always feel a bit worried that I'm annoying her and it's consuming my bra #I do also still feel a little guilty about having this crush; internalized homophobia/issues around sexuality are hard to shake off #and while it's very normal and stuff I never dare to go the entire way when my brain conjures fantasies that are a little too risqué #I just feel guilty man I know I shouldn't but still it fucking sucks in my brain #and god talking about this in therapy would be a mess #I might have to eventually but I don't wanna #anyways; wild vent in the tags aside; yay a whis!

[hungerpunch]

i see even comedy that doesn't typically "punch down" has circled back around to using crackhead/crackwhore as a joke. i'm so exhausted by you all. you are so cruel, so casually callous, it's worrisome. you don't realize how easily that could be you. you think you're so superior, so pure, so intelligent as if addiction cares about how smart you are or what you do in life. as if this entire country (usamerica) is not machinated in a way to get people hooked on painkillers. as if the docuseries industry isn't busting with expositions that reveal the wide-ranging sprawl of addiction here and exactly how manipulated we have been. as if loads of people in "white collar" jobs aren't addicts. as if loads of stay at home parents aren't addicts. as if addicts can't have pearly smiles and collect a paycheck. as if there's any real merit between the person who got into a party drug as an impressionable kid then couldn't stop and the lawyer who started doing coke to stay awake for 80-hour workweeks then couldn't stop and the unsuspecting patient who was prescribed opioids by a doctor then couldn't stop. there's not. no one is better than anyone else. addiction is leveling. equalizing.

and the worst part is you are one, too, you up there on your high horse. you're addicted to something. something in this world has its claws in you, its grip on you, that you want to stop but can't, that you could not stop without support. so shut up. shut the fuck up. the people you call crackwhores, meth heads, junkies, etc. they are real fucking people. we are real fucking people just like you. we are real people who deserve your fucking respect and compassion. we are just people who are trying to exist within a system that is trying to eat us alive, just like the rest of you. it's not cute. it's not fucking cute. it's not cool. stop fucking laughing.

#lol brb i'm gonna go have a cry now then throw myself into work #i am feeling so worn by how intentionally mean people are to each other like #not the oops i didn't realize that was offensive kind but the #intentionally. on purpose. derisive and dismissive and cold. and unwilling to reach for empathy or compassion or consideration at all. #yeah keep knocking us down to size. one day it will be you if it's not already. #a doctor prescribed me xanax when i was SIXTEEN FUCKING YEARS OLD. FOR MIGRAINES. #i realize i have yet to process how that affected the next [check notes] 14 years of my life #you know. since. he just kept refilling it for me even though years would pass btwn seeing me in person lol. #anyway wow sorry think i just found out what i need to talk abt in therapy this wk! #my lyfe #driveby post #addiction #drugs

[peribirb]

you ever catch feelings for somebody but you've spent your entire life convinced/convincing yourself that you're fundamentally unattractive and broken in a way that makes you unlovable and unsuited to any sort of relationship, and so instead of just enjoying that extra dopamine burst of seeing them around you just make yourself feel miserable for even daring to feel that way in the first place? or is that just me?

#hhhh i hope this doesn't come across as some sort of “ohhhhh you have to come fix me and save me” bullshit cus that's not it. it's just #i'm sick of my brain acting like this and i wish i could process my emotions in a healthier way #one that doesn't feel like i'm just using them to mentally selfharm you know #or at the very least in a way where i don't immediately think i'm being some sort of creep for daring to find somebody attractive #i just. don't have the self-esteem for it and my brain immediately sabotages even just idle fantasy scenarios #some sort of long-term relationship? god i'm so distant and easily distracted i'd just hurt them by inadvertently ignoring them #something short-term and low-key? well i'll still forget to check in or i'll fuck up some other way and feelings will get hurt #just fuckin? god i hate my body so much i. cannot convince myself that i'm desirable in any way #even if i literally know people who would tell me otherwise and mean it. it's just so deep-seated i think #i think i just have a lot of problems to work on. and i don't really know how to go through that process yet #anyway. this isn't like helpful processing of emotions or anything it's just venting lol #this doesn't even cover the “am i aroace or not” confusion spiral that i've got going on... #it was a therapy day so my brain is already primed to Dig In Deep to everything that hurts #:thumbsup: #vent #delete later

[babacontainsmultitudes]

[just venting a bit into the void you understand you understand 😌] Lately I've been feeling very caught between "I have a lot of thoughts on Sparrow and Normal and all that with the ending and teen talk and feel like I need to get them out and voice them for my own piece of mind and resolution" and "I am lacking the strength and energy to actually sit down and write it all out and kind of really just want to fully move on to other things (AUs, fics, anything else)" but my brain can't seem to commit to either and that's quite frustrating cause it's just left me very restless. *Sigh*. Idk! Just needed to complain about that a bit ig, it's silly but this is what has been ailing me as of late.

#Then there's also a part of me that's like “does anyone even care at this point? haven't I already talked about them too much?” #but I have seen many a take that irk me... #and perhaps at the center of it all nagging at me is that persistent conflation of love and pride #Less about that in Normal's mind so much as in Will's and the fandom's 🤔 #Also that reoccurring issue of the fandom going ''Normal thinks this therefore it is The Truth'' though I believe I've discussed this befor #And... Hooks Will could have grabbed onto but didn't... Quite a few of those... #And the double standard/negativity bias in fandom of ignoring that Sparrow says both that he loves and likes Normal while doodlerized #But not treating those with the same legitimacy we do the pride thing. And ignoring Sparrow's demonstrations of love and change... #And what the love wolf scene actually implies about Sparrow (as I see it) with his own explanation of the pride thing in mind #But also!!! Also on Norm's epilogue and how despite everything taken at face value (i.e. no teen talk influence) I don't actually hate it #and I think it's plenty salvageable #And gah also that like *regardless* of how things turn out with Normal and his dad- #Well I haven't listened to much of the teen talk just the directly Sparrow-relevant clips #so I don't know quite how cynical Will is or isn't about Normal's future #But like. UGH. What I'm trying to say is even if things didn't find resolution vis-a-vis his dad #(which tbh I could go either way on- it's the meta misinterpretations of Sparrow that Bother me not so much Normal's) #(Well that's complicated. Again it comes back to the love vs. pride thing gosh this is so vague of me lol) #With all the positive influences in his life (and just the fact that life is long? and therapy is a thing?) I just don't see Normal- #being Miserable for the rest of his life. Like. I mean I won't elaborate here really but damn it no he can absolutely turn out alright stil #blugh #BUT YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN THAT'S A LOT OF STUFF AND THAT'S ONLY VAGUE RAMBLINGS ABOUT *SOME* OF IT #Like I'm proud of a lot of my essay posts (which I'm hoping to eventually compile in a masterpost eventually actually) but they take a whil #And if my heart wants to do other things... Ah idk... #ANYWAYS a vent to vent a vent to vent

[i-will-always-love-the-jedi]

Welcome to „The High Republic“, where everybody is traumatized :D

I couldn’t put everyone on that chart, but we all can clearly see the average trauma

Also if someone has suggestions/ criticism, I’ll gladly take it :)

…

#im too tired to draw #so meme instead it is #i could go into detail about why I chose to put who where #this is a weird sentence #English isn’t my mother language #anyways i feel Orla already almost started therapy with elzar #we saw sskeer doing his mental self journey #bell is just one of the writers punchbags #and the firebrands are pretty clear too #tho i do have to say I had some struggle with elzar and avar #you could switch them and it would probably still work #i do think I solved it well #elzar wouldn’t even admit he needs therapy #and avar is such a burned out gifted (and probably neurodivergent) kid #that girls head is fucked up im telling y’all #Phase 3 is soon so we’re probably gonna see her kill lourna #slay #i cant fucking wait #the high republic #elzar mann #avar kriss #stellan gios #keeve trennis #vernestra rwoh #bell zettifar #sskeer #orla jareni #estala maru #(how does he not have a tag?) #:(

[sentiniel]

ooh what did i tell you. you all wanna be me so bad.

#rwde #rwby crit #look im just salty. i hold no grudges really #except for a 'i told you so'. #like. really. it's not a suicide attempt #ruby is too important as a character for the show to let go of #and the people in the world already said reincarnation is integral to their ecosystem #how hard is that to understand? #anyway my point is #yall really jumped on the suicide bandwagon real quick #when all the tea was supposed to do is help you #if you are depressed and you go into therapy you know you'll come out better #but did you know that your medication has a black box warning? #you were reacting to the black box warning #let it go.

[batfamfucker]

I will now be personally headcanoning that Bruce pulled Tim aside one day to ask his opinion on if Tim would ever consider changing or adding Alfred to his middle name(s). I've always interpreted Jack Drake as having been abusive towards Tim, due to some of the comics where he's been violent and such (Like the time he destroyed some of Tim's belongings and such when he was angry at him, or the straight up neglect when Jack and Janet went to explore the world regularly and leave Tim behind, forgot his birthday, etc), and so I feel like sometimes Tim would feel icky about keeping his middle name as 'Jackson' after his biological father (I'm surprised he ever kept 'Drake' and didn't just fully move to 'Wayne', but alas). I feel like Bruce would also be aware that Tim sometimes feels left out of the family, especially due to the early years of him and Damian's dynamic and constantly being told he was never Bruce's 'real son'. It doesn't take a lot of common sense to realise those kind of words will linger, even after the brothers have improved their relationship. I had originally thought to consider this with Damian, but he's already named after Thomas, so I feel as though Bruce would choose Tim so that he gets to both honour his second father, and let Tim know that he will always be Bruce's son and a part of the family, regardless of DNA. Tim accepts, and so his middle name becomes Alfred, instead of Jackson.

Alfred doesn't find out until he's going over some family legal documents and sees it. He cries when he does.

#I feel as though Bruce would have also considered Jason especially when Jason adores Alfred #And he knows Jason can also feel estranged from the family for obvious reasons #So I feel he would've discussed it with him too as well as Dick to let them know that he isn't trying to leave either of them out #Or make them feel like they're not his sons. But he thinks it would really help Tim's ongoing doubts whilst ensuring he wasn't named #After his abuser (Again I'm ignoring the Drake thing) #And I think Jason and Dick would be understand of it. Dick is named after his biological dad who he loves so he's all good. And Jason is #Aware that Bruce loves him after some therapy and family counselling sessions that Bruce took them to to improve their relationship #Which worked. So Jason knows Bruce is always going to cherish him as his son despite their history. And also both #Brothers are very aware of Tim's feelings (Jason and Tim have bonded over it. He knows how bad Tim can get mentally when he thinks about it #too much) so Jason is completely fine letting his baby brother have the name. Makes up for those bad early days between them a little #Which Jason does still feel guilty about and has talked over with Tim during some of their deep talks where he apologised for it. #Either way I feel like it's the classic Big BrotherTM who also wants his Baby BrotherTM to be okay even if he doesn't admit it #I'm also headcanoning that Cass who didn't have a middle name was approached by Bruce who asked if she liked Martha as a contender #She definitely did #Anyway- I won't tag everyone because I've used half the tag limit already so just the ones in the post #Tim Drake #Bruce Wayne #Alfred Pennyworth #Robin #Red Robin #Batman #Agent A #Tim Drake Wayne #Tim Wayne #Batfamily #Abuse mention tw #Headcanon

[holyluvr]

Schizotypal PD is basically a disorder reliant on stress management and environmental factors being managed and coped with, so it’s hard for me to understand why it’s talked about differently than disorders like Cluster B. No, it will never go away and doesn’t need to because if the Schizotypal person decides to take control of their life and reach out for help through the discomfort, stays on the right track, or was blessed into a wonderful environment that supports their needs and quirks, they’ll be fine. It’s much like the Autism Spectrum in that regard.

Our sanity and growth depends a lot on our general QOL going well to be able to keep up in managing troublesome symptoms that cause social regression or distress. The worse the anxiety or low mood, the more disconnection and mixing of reality. Or it’ll be a negative perception, negative beliefs, negative magical thinking, negative illusions, etc.

Our entire perception of reality, belief systems, obsessions, magical thinking, illusions, quasi-psychosis and transient psychosis, the way we perceive ourselves, ability to organize speech and thoughts, to mask, and more- Those are traits that change depending on our stress levels and how often we manage stable moods.

& it’s rough because this world is not kind to clinical schizotypy, and it’s not built how most of us feel it should be. We struggle with understanding others, and they struggle with understanding us. We struggle to understand each other. Environmental factors aren’t easy to make better when all of this is happening, and especially when it can’t be diagnosed until someone is 18 without any subclinical or pediatric disorders to take its place…

#… #like being told at almost 19 that actually all of my past therapy was bullshit and being given an explanation that made sense was good…. #….but what about the years I spent in therapy before that? I had to unlearn almost everything and haven’t still. #my family was jarred too. they didn’t know about it. they didn’t know how to support that or to believe it when I was diagnosed falsely for #yearsssss while doctors argued if I was schizophrenic or not lmfao #so its like wow! management is to catch it soon and work on lifestyle:)……um we’re 18 by the time you catch it and a lot can happen in 18 #years to a schizotypal child. so…. we’re already fucked up and traumatized lmfaoo why else would we go to therapy? #but anyway yeah coping with discomfort is extremely low in schizotypy it seems. just a common trait and makes sense. its hard to learn to #cope with that when I don’t know what comfort means

[uefb]

Sometimes the only thing that gets me through the day is knowing I can escape into writing Scamander brother repartee. (18k words from the current posted point in Head Under One Wing…)

#I love them your honor #newt Scamander #Theseus Scamander #Scamander brothers #autistic newt scamander #the italics are bc AAC basically #because I headcanon newts dad worked with a buddy to come up with an enchanted parchment system when newt was a kiddo #and was having trouble communicating traditionally & in certain social situations #I’m heavily projecting of course bc I just got in trouble when I wouldn’t talk in public or quit being able to speak #and I think I’d have had a lot less stress growing up if my mom had been like ‘it’s not illegal for you to sometimes talk another way’ #but anyway - the context of it for this scene outside me occasionally using fic for therapy is #that newts had a bit of a shutdown due to extreme emotional & physical stress and is having trouble verbally communicating #his elderly father came to visit him & brought him one of those charmed parchments from when he was like 7 #and Newt refused it at first and then gave in — and theseus has rolled w it as if nothing has happened #but this scene is a heart to heart between the two brothers #about tina #but I’ve spoiled enough abt the second half of this story so I’m going to shut the fck up now #damn it I wish I was done with chs #12/13 slash 14/15 #I have so many of the sequels already started but this boring ass fluff chapter is killing me #(not the *excerpt* chapter — the sweet newtina chapter I’m currently stuck on) #ok fluff isn’t boring but it’s also not my strength ok? #I relate to Newt for a reason #anywayyyyyyy #uefb rambles in the tags #my stuff #fic: with its head under one wing