#good job internet you're winning

[elialys]

ngl posting fics really isn't fun anymore these days, im not even anxious about the complete lack of interaction, which used to make me feel like I was writing shit, now it just...makes me so sad that's it's gotten to that point

#i genuinely dont see the point of SHARING anymore #when most of the times im met with silence or something close to it #reaching the point where i think i might just write those things because i still need to write them #but i won't be posting online #because its really not a nice feeling to see the hit counts go up and get no interaction #as always it makes me feel dumb for being happy to share #anyway i guess it's a mood these days #good job internet you're winning #killing the will of yet another fic writer #and i was happy about soon celebrating my 20 years as a fic writer lol #writing #fic writing

[pierregazly]

let's show the world ꨄ carlos sainz smau

carlos sainz x wife!reader

warnings: hateful/mean comments, cyberbullying

in which carlos has to make it clear to the world how much his wife means to him, and how strangers on the internet know nothing about them or their relationship.

f1drivernews

liked by username, username, username, and 11,209 others

tagged carlossainz55 and yourusername

f1drivernews it appears ferrari driver carlossainz55 and wife yourusername spent the summer break in style, rumours have it that the resort they stayed in ibiza was almost €7500 per person a night. sainz and his wife have been notorious for staying in extravagant hotels and resorts during both summer and winter breaks. the lifestyles of the rich and famous continues!

view all 399 comments

username oh the things i would do to be a millionaire

username just be like yourusername and bag yourself a rich husband, constant flow of money lol

username that's a polite way of saying just be a gold-digger and you'll be set babes

username lol the fact b4 he met her carlos used to spend breaks with his fam and friends??? has no one told him how much of a red flag this is???

username girl since when is a driver spending their break with their WIFE a red flag???

username €7500 PER PERSON???? aint no way that was carlos' idea lol what a joke

username i'd be so embarrassed to be yourusername like what does girlypop even do??? other than mooch off her husband ofc

username she's actually very successful in her own line of work? not sure what you're alluding to but yeah

username she could be the top 10% of whatever she does and still not be as successful as carlos, hop off hunni

username guess f1drivernews was too nice to post the hideous closeups of yourusername... girly's not looking too great nowadays poor carlos

carlossainz55 has posted a story

liked by yourusername, landonorris, username, and others

replies

landonorris your mrs told me she got a hole in one, how's it feel to suck carlos

yourusername 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

username bet you paid out of your ass for her for this round of golf too smh

username embarrizzing sorrrrryyy carlos

yourusername has posted a story

liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, landonorris, and others

replies

carlossainz55 thank you for dinner amor, you spoil me as always

username girl delete this rn this is so embarrassing

username loool ur not fooling anyone sweetie

username red nails for a golddigger? typical babes

yourusername

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, scuderiaferrari, and 2,343 others

tagged carlossainz55

yourusername i'm amazed by you every single day, even more when you come back to our room stinking of champagne 💗

view all 187 comments

landonorris no special post for me?? you told me i was ur son the other day and this is the treatment i get ? emancipation right now

landonorris before you say it, i know that's a big word for elmo. thanks.

alexandrasaintmleux im still obsessed with that jacket 🫶🏻

username you looked so pretty this weekend! carlos is so lucky

carlossainz55 always more special when we're both coming back smelling like champagne hermosa

username i think its like so childish u deleted 75% of ur followers like u wanna be in the public eye but dont want what comes with it??? weird but alright

username im so over you honestly carlos deserves better

username ur acc the worst wag like yikes

f1gossip

liked by username, username, username and 75,903 others

tagged carlossainz55

f1gossip the streets are saying carlos was in suzuka alone this week, his wife of two years yourusername reportedly took a flight home instead of following her husband along to suzuka after the singapore win... trouble in paradise? 👀👀

view all 4,870 comments

username omg it's happening

username FINALLY GOOD RIDDANCE

username my man is back on the market!!!!! time for someone prettier, hotter, better, basically anyone opposite of his wife lol byeeeee

username ur all insane, she has her own job??? she can't follow her husband to every end of the earth

username waiting for the ig stories 'we've decided to split amicably, please allow us privacy'

username LOOOL i bet it's gonna say that word for word!!!! not like we'll see hers tho cause she locked us all out

username this acc made my day ahhhhhhhh

yourusername has posted a story

viewed by landonorris, carlossainz55, alexandrasaintmleux, and others

replies

carlossainz55 amor what's wrong??

yourusername i just dont understand why people have to be so mean.

landonorris carlando to the rescue dont worry y/n

carlossainz55

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, landonorris, and 1,399,402 others

tagged yourusername

carlossainz55 this last week has been extra special for me, to know it is the anniversary of the first time i met my best friend, and that she was able to be with me when i lifted the trophy in singapore is a wonderful feeling.

but to see all the ignorant, unkind, and hurtful comments that are regularly directed at my wife has put a negative twirl on this time. my wife, to me, is the most beautiful woman in the world. she is kind, and loving, and has given up the world for me time and time again. no one knows our relationship more than her and i. many of you speak things that are so ignorant and false it is disgusting. if you are one of these people, please know, you are not a fan i find myself caring for.

i beg those who continue to speak poorly of my wife, to think about how your actions can harm others. thank you. and to yourusername, you are the most important light in my life. i cant wait to see you amor.

comments on this post have been limited

landonorris 🧡🧡

charles_leclerc be kind always!

yourusername te amo, always and forever.

carlossainz55 has posted a story

liked by yourusername, landonorris, username, and 55,399 others

replies

yourusername i didnt even see you take that photo... ur so cute ily

landonorris tell her i got 50 of the flowers for her

username omg i love that book!!!! y/n has great taste what a queen

username i would die to be ur wife, but i would also die to be y/n's wife so lol

ahhhh this is the smau part 2 i promised to my last carlos written story! thank you to the lovely person who requested it, i hope it's what you wanted! please let me know what you think, i hope you all loved it 💗

taglist

@leclercdream @myescapefromthislife @princessria127 @iloveyou3000morgan @love4lando @asfaraslifegets @decseptapril @somanyfandomsbruh @fangirl125reader @imagandom @motorsp0rt @jspitwall @sarahedwards16 @glitterf1 @christianpulisic10 @carlandonorri-s @smoothopz @eugene-emt-roe @epitios @ihrtdan @myloverjk-blog @glow-ish @goldenmclaren @mercunty

if your name is bolded/striked tumblr wont allow me to tag you! ive tried multiple things, but it's unfortunately giving me a very hard time with a few people. im so sorry! please let me know if you'd like to be added to the list!!

#carlos sainz #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz x you #f1 x reader #f1 x you #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 x you #f1 smau #carlos sainz smau #carlos sainz imagine #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 #formula 1

[sanjisboyfie]

one piece smau: vacation edition

— strawhats being a cute friend group once again

— male reader, everyone having the tiniest crush on him too but thats only if u swuint (im a very selfindulgent writer sorry)

— also i imagine robin, franky and brook to be older than the rest of hte crew, but not like crazy older. its probably not really relevant, but like mid twenties insead of their thirties and forties LMFAOA the rest of the crew is young twenties

liked by ._.[name], princesanji, and 10k others

dni_nami: pre-7hr flight question, how long until we all start killing each other? everyone place your bets

tagged: ._.[name], freeluffy, and princesanji

uso_pp: we barely made it through the airport without losing luffy, so i'm placing my bet on one hour.

[liked by ._.[name], roro.zoro, and 20 others]

-> dr.law: i'm surprised you even made it through airport security....

-> freeluffy: TOORRAOO YOU SHOULD'VE COME IT WOULDVE BEEN SO FUNNNN!!!

-> dr.law: hard pass. good luck everyone else.

._.[name]: i think it's gonna be fine !!! what's the worst that can happen tbh

-> dni_nami: i could list 100 reasons why this is gonna go bad and all of them involve luffy.

-> robinkills: [name]'s right, i think this trip is going to be very fun !

liked by roro.zoro, robinkills, and 11k others

freeluffy: [name] rented bikes for us, but he won't let me drive :/

tagged: ._.[name]

SUPERCOLA: good job [name] for saving his life, much appreciated

dni_nami: i'm begging you two to not crash and make the expenses of our trip go up even more

-> princesanji: always thinking logically, nami, this is why i love you so much <333333333333333

roro.zoro: pick up some sake otw back

-> ._.[name]: yesyesyes we all know thats the only reason why you came anyway, i'll pick some up

-> roro.zoro: what. no way. i definitely wanted to be sat on a hours long flight next to luffy and be living in a small apartment with all of my friends who dont know how to speak quietly and wont let me sleep even when its already early morning. what. i am so excited to be here.

-> uso_pp: alright we get it please stop

liked by princesanji, SUPERCOLA, and 8k others

robinkills: thank you [name] for winning me the prizes :)

tagged: ._.[name]

._.[name]: anything for you robin <3 aka the person thats keeping all of us sane right now <3

princesanji: HOW DARE THIS BAFFOON STEAL YOU AWAY ROBIN PLEASE LET ME TAKE CARE OF HIM, I WILL MAKE SURE HE NEVER BOTHERS YOU AGAIN

-> uso_pp: when is sanji going to accept the fact that [name] is actually apart of this friend group and that he is also more favored by the women we interact with

-> ._.[name]: dw usopp he only puts on a hard front, he ltr begged me to room with him so he could cuddle w me at night. he's just being shy rn

[liked by dni_nami, roro.zoro, and 40 others]

freeluffy: [NAME] [NAME] DID YOU GET ME THEONE I WANTED TOO??!?!?! REMEMBER I SHOWED YOU

-> ._.[name]: yes luffy :) we are otw back and i have the one you asked for as well.

-> SUPERCOLA: [name] the absolute goat in dealing with luffy and his absurd requests so the rest of us dont have to

liked by freeluffy, roro.zoro, ._.[name], and 9k others

uso_pp: morning debrief where we all share embarrassing stories, like how [name] almost stripped completely naked drunk last night because an ice spice song was playing on the karaoke.

._.[name]: alright genuinely why the fuck did that have to be the caption you put on the internet for the whole world to see

-> roro.zoro: no dont be embarassed [name] it was funny watching you try and copy her signature pose

[liked by dni_nami, robinkills, and 90 others]

-> dni_nami: don't think about even crossing me in the future, i have a video of the whole thing bby

-> ._.[name]: GOD FORBID A GUY HAS FUN

skullnsoul: i found [name]'s dancing and singing quite endearing

-> ._.[name]: thank you brook :') you're so sweet

-> skullnsoul: yes, although i feel like you're much too old to be wearing underwear with hearts as the print, [name]. i suggest buying new pairs of boxers :)

-> ._.[name]: what the actual fuck

liked by princesanji, uso_pp, and 11k others

dni_nami: i really wish you could hear sanji cursing [name] outin this photo

tagged: princesanji and ._.[name]

._.[name]: me when im literally following the instructions that hes telling me and i somehow still get yelled at

-> princesanji: do you even understand hwo cooking meat works? everyone would have gotten salmonella and food poisoning if i didn't teach you how

->._.[name]: yelling is never the answer sanji

-> freeluffy: I THINK [NAME]'S COOKING TASTED REALLY GOOD

uso_pp: they acc cookeedddd tho like our food was so tastyyy

[liked by princesanji, ._.[name], and 9 others]

robinklills: sanji almost shoved [name]'s head into the griller, it was funny

-> ._.[name]: HE WHAT ??!?!?! I DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE THAT HE TRIED DOING THA TWHAT THE FUCK

liked by princesanji, ._.[name], and 12k others

roro.zoro: [name] told me to post this photo he took.

tagged: princesanji and ._.[name]

dni_nami: awww look all the boys finally getting along

[liked by robinkills, uso_pp, vivi, and 50 others]

-> princesanji: i would have much rather been in your presence my queen, i love you so much

-> ._.[name]: sanjii give up the bit for fucks sake

uso_pp: where was me and luffy's inv ??? ig its like that now ....

-> roro.zoro: you guys were playing mermaids in the pool at the apartment and explicitly told us to not interfere with your serious business

-> princesanji: and then you started getting mad at us for invitig you again right before we left

._.[name]: damn zoro u lookin mad fine in this photo shiiiitttt #smash

-> roro.zoro: i need you to make sure your door is locked later tn or else i cant promise you will wake up the next day

liked by dni_nami, vivi, roro.zoro, and 12k others

._.[name]: thank u nami for the photos

tagged: dni_nami

._.[name]: btw nami made me post this w that caption so it could "scare away the hoes"

-> dni_nami: im doing them a favor, they just dont know it yet cuz ur fucking insane

-> uso_pp: LMFAOAO

purrrona: can i bite it?

-> ._.[name]: BITE WHAT?????

-> purrrona: so is that a yes or a no?

-> uso_pp: professional dick rider alert !!!!

roro.zoro: why is your thirst trap the first thing i have to see when i open this app

-> ._.[name]: why are you acting like you weren't the first person to like this post???

[liked by dni_nami, robinkills, and 57 others]

portgasace: WHY THE FUCK WAS I NOT INVITED ON THIS TRIP?????

dr.law: id also like to thank nami for the photos

#≡;- ꒰ ° smau series ꒱ #one piece smau #one piece imagines #modern one piece #modern au one piece #smau imagines #one piece x reader #one piece x male reader #x male reader #male reader #male reader imagines

[familyabolisher]

hey, I was reading your posts on the use of 'reading comprehension' and found them really enlightening. I'm wondering, are there similar undercurrents to how people use lack of reading comprehension to describe the tendency for people to read and interpret in bad faith online, or are they different things grouped together under the same label?

hm yeah i would say there are some similar undercurrents happening. i think glibly mocking [a lack of] reading comprehension in response to a bad-faith/hostile/animous/etc engagement (like eg. the trend of replying with 'reading comprehension questions' that aim to glibly point out logical flaws in the initial response and present it as obviously ridiculous and overblown) is falling back on that same discursive construction -- that a lack of 'reading comprehension' is embarrassing, that reading something poorly or wrongly is something you should be sure never to do in public, and whoever can score the most Reading Comprehension Points in the argument wins the discourse.

i also just find it, like, unfunny and boring. even in genuinely bad-faith interpretations of a post, it has an air of smugness to it that i find really off-putting -- it's a very, like, you sir have won the internet for today-type tone. and there are multiple cases where i've seen this Ha Ha No Reading Comprehension thing deployed to suggest that someone reading between the lines of a claim made in a post to point out eg. particular biases, particular suggestions of bigotry, that the post doesn't explicitly name but are certainly discursively present is obviously being dense or hysterical; it's an easy win in a discourse where to name something as eg. subtly racist, transphobic, misogynistic, etc., is already presumed to be hysterical overreaction by people who know better than to outright name it as such but are still predisposed to view it in that light when given the opportunity to do so covertly.

(eg: op says X; a responder points out that X implies Y and is emerging from a discourse of Z; op laughs at them by claiming that they only said X and if you're seeing Y or Z then you clearly have no reading comprehension because X without Y or Z is obvious to op's often already biased audience and the conversation is shut down.)

it's got a real like, deployment of Facts And Logic feel to it; i don't think it does a good job in actually engaging with the responder and understanding where their interpretation is coming from, which can ofc be chalked up to the fact that that's literally not what it's supposed to do -- it's supposed to get a fun dunk in and make the initial responder look silly. i more than understand frustration at people reading your posts in bad faith and i can't fairly be mad at people for lashing out about it -- i've done it before! -- but, like. i think we should just try and steer clear of discursive constructions which reify the stigmatisation of poor reading comprehension (or mediation of tone on the internet, which is also at play here).

#ask

[court-jobi]

Trustfall

(gif from Pinterest)

Pairing: Din Djarin x biker!Reader

Words: 8,865

Rating: Teen & Up, (mature themes, but not graphic)

Warnings: canon-typical violence, chase scene action, catcalling, skeevey sleemos, brief descrip of injuries/roadburn, consensual touching, injury care, FEELINGS, fluff to intimacy, first kiss #thehelmetcomesoff ((fem reader, mild descriptions of features, hair etc.))

Summary: Most jobs' occupational hazards may include some warnings for heavy machinery: not 3rd degree roadburn and blaster shots to the face. Just your luck, that's what happens in your line of work.... While your partner-in-not-quite-crime Din Djarin has quite a bit of on-the-job experience with patching himself up after his skirmishes, tending to yourself after a shitshow like this is new territory. Some things are just too tender to see from behind the helmet-- and need the naked eye.

Sounds like he really needs to trust you if he's going to give you help with this one...

"I'm not going without you- -and you're not going alone" -P!nk, 2023

AN: thank you from the bottom of my heart, internet strangers, for the love for my little stories... this is a long one! here's to the countdown to season 3 finale, and a dose of feminine rage, badassery, and fluff to soften the landing~

For my Star Wars | Mandalorian Masterlist, check it out here!

Read on AO3

Anywhere in the galaxy you turn, there's a place you can navigate like the back of your hand: simply find where the drinks are flowing. Every watering hole may have its tricky language and even trickier problems, but the money's always good, and no questions are asked of you. 

At a cantina, you rely on this. Here, you know you can easily fall back to old habits in an instant. Safety first, of course. 

The rundown: where's the doors, where's the bouncers, where’s the barkeep and where's the biggest guy in the room. You've trained yourself to  look for gaps, low traffic areas where you could make a quick dash out if things are looking sideways. Do all those things as fast as you can, too, because everything can change in a second. Tables can flip over like a credit chip– tempers, all the more quick to the draw. Oh, and don't be suspicious. Give a little smile if you can chance it– unassuming glances always make folks feel better.

But it's a bit different now. You don't bother to look up when you cross the threshold of a new place. You don't dissect all these fine details. After all, you've got a green baby that's twisting in his sling across your hips that has your attention split, and he comes first. 

That's a full time job on its own… and whenever he comes along for the day, you don't forget the best part of the arrangement you find yourself in. 

You've got a bounty hunter in stride. Worry is the furthest thing from your mind. He’s got you. 

Upon first entry, the Mandalorian you've been hyperspace hopping with comes in like he'd likely done hundreds of times before. He's no stranger to reading a room, either. Though this time, with you and the little one tucked away in your crossbody, the company he keeps is completely different. This dynamic is far from your norm, but there’s so many things you love about it– and as it turns out, the feeling is mutual. He tells you so, that you don’t have to worry when he’s with you. 

You buckled in the kiddo yourself– a break for Mando's still-tender shoulder. The scuffle you'd just come from not twelve hours ago was still fresh in both your minds– not that your sabacc face showed it. He appreciated your offering to keep tabs and hold him today. Still gotta fix his pod after the 'swimming incident' last week… after this payday, maybe you two could swing it after your winnings arrive. 

Heading towards his unofficial corner of this planet's best underground lounge, Mando picked up through his peripherals the bits of chatter– no… -hunger- coming from some of the smaller pods of wranglers. Their attention wasn't due to the shinier beskar plates he wore. No, it was all aimed at his newfound companion. 

They're all looking at you… not that you notice.

One in particular caught Mando’s honed attention as you neared, passing him to the bartop while he waited. The man wasn't the biggest in size, but Mando knew this type; that smarmy smile told him he’s thinking himself roguishly handsome, but made of complete slime and bantha-shit.

“Bike’s out back~” you paused by the bar to pick up the drink you’d nodded for, and made a convincing-looking fake sip while sticking close to his side. “-unregistered. Pokka dropped it off this morning for a nearby delivery run. It’s not the prettiest thing, but it’ll do in a pinch for a two-seater.” 

Just after that line left your lips, something in the schmuck’s eye and his low murmur to his buddy. A near growl about the ‘not the only thing I'd pinch– pretty thing, coming right up’ made your partner turn with micro-precision in the direction of the smugglers–

–and catch your hand with a fierceness. Right in front of their table.

You're surprised by the sudden gesture. 

When he did let go around the back of the row of booths, the Mandalorian more or less guided you by the small of your back instead. If anyone were invested enough past their drink's contents to be watching, they’d find you in a half embrace. This move allowed Mando the space to tuck you into his side with a corralling arm. You'd honestly not registered what he’d witnessed until he fell back to your pace with a gentle ‘this way’. A pod of spacers were gawking– at the shiny guy loaded to the gils with blasters, you thought. 

Now closer, you had less room, but still managed enough to swing the munchkin to your front. The ‘bag’ made a little noise- an indignant question at your description of the ride you’d secured.

“Sorry, excuuuse me- three seater! Two and a half more like, with your size...”

Situating yourself with some disappointed looks your way, you took the near end of the bench Mando directed you to. Didn’t take much to know not to keep eye contact too long with any of these unsavory characters around you, so you kept to yourself. Once Mando slid in from the opposite side, you asked him, 

"Quite the crowd huh?--oof–"-

Rather than allow the space for the little guy in between you, Mando slid in right beside you: an arm behind you and a small thud of his heavy fist on the table. The tracer clacked as it landed in front of him.

Someone's got him acting testy. You eyed your hunter as he brooded; a small twinkle flitted behind your eyes, 

“See someone you know?" you asked.

"No." the Mandalorian spat out, curtly.

"Then what's wrong?"

His helmet turned to you, then ahead again.

"I didn't like how they were looking at you."

You bristled, really checking the room for the first time, managing the kid in your lap with a little glance. From the moment you took stock of the table nearest you, their quick darts in your direction told you just how rusty you were. They’re all locked onto you. 

The whole point of your taking the kiddo for Mando was to seem less out of place, not a target.

“You don’t– think folks all the way out here are gonna go after him?” Nervousness flared in your voice, though for the sake of appearances, you didn't dare let it show on your face, “Who even reads the Imp notices anymore? This whole town’s a glorified farming dustball-”

Mando corrected you, “Not him.” 

He murmured that into your shoulder like it was obvious.

A stunted breath tripped up your budding confusion. 

"Well, if it's not the sight of a baby in a bar making them creep, what then?”

“You.”

Not for the first time, you checked the look of yourself. It’s what you faced from the reflection of the beskar cheek looking back at you when you addressed him– never his face, but yours. Then, to the room. Sure, you weren’t so rough-and-tough looking from the outside, but–

"..Hold on." Flatly, you turned towards him; a quarter turn from your cozy spot. "You're saying I'm the distraction here."

All you got  in response was a little quirk of the helmet. 

You bristled, “I’m not the only-”

“I know you’re not,” he hushed you again, still scanning his sights across the venue like a sentry camera, “but these bantha-breaths are all the same when it comes to- distractions.” 

Your eyes fluttered in a muted roll. “And you think that’s new?”

“New to me.”

“Cmon. All this? You’ve gotten plenty of looks before.”

“Not the way they were watching you. The kid had nothing to do with it.”

You never take having such protective company for granted, but Mando's insinuation that you're bringing unwanted attention was surprising– and irritating.

“Please. You flatter me, I hardly think I’m the biggest draw in the room, hon.” you settled in. Harmless, but indignant, “You want me to really up the appeal? Then we should have planned ahead, and set up a rotation for me in the dance schedule.”

His gloves crackled at the creases– their grip unmistakable, “That’s an invitation for trouble.”

“No, messing with you is an invitation for trouble. I’m not trouble.”

“May not mean to, but you might cause us some.”

In truth, this observation wasn't unfounded; of the scarred, sweaty hunters and mechanics that filled this bar, you'd likely look out of place somewhere half this packed… and there’s no mistaking with the way you’re dressed that you are no fair-eyed performer like the real beauties in here. Sure your face under the visor shield might tell a different story when you appear more intimidating on the road, but here on this world, you passed over the need for even a 

This was your job, and not your first time in this line of work. You wore the kit, you didn't strut or flaunt your stuff around, and you certainly never drank on the job either. Just looked and played the part you needed to. If he didn’t want you to come meet the contact, then why ask you to join him? The whole point of this plan was to be seen very publicly as a united front, so you wouldn't be suspected of funny business; even if that was going to be your specialty after you start phase two: divide and conquer, as you always do.

Plans change, sure– but only when things turn sideways… not when he’s got some alpha male jealous streak going on behind that bucket of his. That hand grab earlier proved it.

Mando just took centering deep breaths while you ran out of accommodating alternatives. 

“Well, then, what do you want me to do?” the short candor that came out of your mouth wasn’t in your nature– but this was getting annoying, how short he’s acting. He’s not normally this snippy with you… “What, ‘wait by the tram’ till you come out, so I don't tinge that reputation of yours?”

The helm regarded you, then shook off– like he was redacting on the spot.

“I- didn't mean-”

And the backpedaling,

“-Fine.” 

No use fighting for a place you shouldn't be in the first place, because it would only make his job more difficult. Feelings or not, you weren’t out to throw a wrench in the operation just for the sake of your involvement. 

And even if your reason hadn’t won out, you sure weren't up for a soapbox moment either– despite its occupancy in your chest. 

You unstrapped the kid from yourself and placed him in your spot, 

“See ya in a bit, bud,” you laced a kindness into your voice- a sweetness just for him, “Maybe your dad will get his job done better without 'arm candy' throwing off his mojo."

Beelining it to the backdoor, you carried on steaming. You didn't bother looking back, which also meant you missed the Mandalorian’s lock on you the whole way across the rounded bar. Not that you had any doubts that he would be watching you; in fact, you counted on it. But you knew with even more certainty that he wouldn’t stop you. Not when there’s a job to do. You’re just going to set out on yours early. 

Though you may not always see alike, there’s yet to be a final say that makes you not trust him so far. You’ll change the plan, call ‘plot twist’ and go right along with him.

Maybe one of these days he’ll begin to trust you at your word… do Mandalorians even do that with folks who aren’t their kind?

It's a job. A job you can do damn well. So, back to old habits it is. Keep the bike warm and ready for go-time.

In your retreat, you caught a comm from him. Just a blip and slight vibration that caught your attention on your wrist: 

/be careful/

– and just like that, all the temper heating your neck and chest: shocked by a bucket of cold, graciously vigilant water.

Your Mandalorian couldn't resist.. and you really couldn't fault him for it. 

You stopped at the door, slowing as the two words staring back at you made you come to a standstill. Checking back and finding that the man's brilliantly shiny helmet had indeed stayed tracked on you the whole time sent that pang in you alive and burning. A little breath huffed from your nose, but you didn't scowl at him. 

It's just in his nature, he can't turn that off. 

You looked back and nodded.

'I will'. 

“Fancy seeing a livin' breathin' angel who knows her way around a rig~” 

Outside, the smarmy man you'd missed noticing before made good on his interest in you and racked up his courage to act on it. He swaggered over to you by the open air skybike model you’d secured. 

As aloof as he could seem, with that peacocking chest on full display…. He’d even set one of his holsters off to the side, a clear invitation for you to notice another package. Ugh. 

“Vision a’ beauty in a dark, little corner like this, too…" he layered on the sugar,"Must be my lucky day, I tell ya!”

You weren’t having this pathetic attempt. 

“Does this actually work on women…” You leveled your face.

Felt good, giving him a stare down before going back to your solid watch of the back door. 

“C’mon now, pretty thing,” more swaggered steps towards you had your insides cringing– and had you moving ‘round the speeder to the mount side, “Couldn’t keep my eyes off’a ya in there– yer a stunner!”

And you don’t take a hint. “Not interested– I’m working.” Kept talking, too, like your words had just been a sneeze. 

“Thought you was that bounty hunter’s girl, but ah-” he comically searched the perimeter of the garage, “--don't see ‘im nowhere.”

You scrolled through your wristcom, “If you did, I’d be sweating if I were you.”

“Got the hots for him, do ya? ‘R are you just friendly is all?”

It took every ounce within you not to react. Don’t give him fodder, just watch the door and keep a  level head. Like he does. 

You cursed yourself. Mando really did have the eyes of a hawk-bat inside. Meanwhile, you were getting rusty– or just far too comfortable. 

Still, this moron was clearly set on poking the still-tender temper inside of you.

“Thinkin,” he made every move to sidle up to you, “I don’t have yer name, sweet’art- whaddthey call ya?”

“Look– I’m not here for my health. Buzz off.” You won’t be getting it.

And another step, to come lean on the front dash- “Right then– I get to guess. Sweetie, it is~”

Some sanity passed through your head, and you figured… the more you talk to this joker, the more he’ll try his luck. A hand on the palmbar, you revved the bike to full power; making your ‘Leech’ jump back, immediately floundering–

“Hey, hey, hey!!” and his sights roved over you, and in an instant, you equally revved his engines, “Ah, bit of fire in ya, huh? Like that in a bitch… Sure you know how to ride this beauty? or I can show you the ropes~”

You finally let your disgust show.

-and thank the Maker for the comm beep to save you. Your partner’s speech-to-text came through on your wrist tab,

//Making an exit//

//Which bay did you clear//

All too grateful, you typed back the number plastered on the overhead air systems installed above you. 

It took a bite of your tongue to keep from writing back a fuller response:

/Listen to the sound of this skug-bag’s jaw hitting the floor- that’s where I’ll be/

but instead you mounted after a quick couple letter keys.

“Well, it’s been a not-so-lovely chat here,” you upturned your own helmet with a flourish, “But after the loss of these braincells I can never get back, I gotta run and make my pickup now.”

The man made a last attempt to lean in over your from the front handlebars, 

“Nah, c’mon, gorgeous, I’ll make it worth your time real good. What’s the hurry? Sure there’s no harm in a bit a’ hooky?”

You laughed high in the back of your throat, giving gushy-sweetness back, with a side of ice–

“Not on your life, sleemo. Door to Hell is open, I hear.”

Then with the pop of your helmet on, you floored a fast reverse and drove off to leave him in the dust.

It almost occurred to you when you paused again to see what became of him, but you were shocked that he was in fact coming after you– with a gang of about four other men. Not that you could make out clearly what they were joshing about in the metallic hangar, but the slang they used about what features were hidden by your clothes was obvious…

The door you parked by remained silent when you rolled up; meaning you’d probably met Mando too soon. He likely wasn’t ‘a few moments away’ after all. And the gang who’s laughing so boisterous was nearing the exit ramp that would take them straight to you.

You tapped the wrist comm again, speaking directly. 

“Got company out here too, Mando,” you firmed up, “Bit of nasty company if that makes a difference!”

In a blink’s time, the audio came back, blaster fire sparkling through the speaker, 

“Same shits from the bar?”

You chortled, then answered clearly,

“Yup. Bold guys, up close.”

“I’ve got their buddies inside too.”

“Well kriffin’– do you need backup in there then?” Your slow reverse and frantic scooting along the floor looking for someplace inconspicuous -and quick- to hide your ride flew through your mind as you came up with plan ‘B’. “I’ll stash this, and lay lower inside.”

“No time– Take a lap– don’t stay where you are–” the Mandalorian blurted out.

You heard the rev of the gang’s engines as they idled around the exit ramp, “Or could you just put a rush on it? I’m already right here–”

“I’ll find you,” he stressed. “DO NOT engage them–”

But before you could snap back with–

“Guess you’re in need of a new boyfriend after all, Sweetie Pie!”

The crass voices appeared from above. While you’d slowed and chatted, they’d hopped the roof and made to bear down on you. The newcomers to the group, a couple Trandoshans and another Kel Door with a new retrofitted mask roved over you like you were a batch of Quarren hot-pot.

Oh, that blaster at your side was tempting… but you revved into top gear, and changed the route again. 

Keep away it is. Just ‘till the boys show up. 

In the end, you lose your seedy admirers after your third pass around. Touch and go driving proved in your favor, messing with their sloppy sense of acceleration with each lap around the back parking area. That was perhaps your saving grace– letting their inebriated states affect their pursuit instead of performing on the offensive– but it was short lived. 

Your first chatty Leech gets a corner up on you and forces your trek on the inner wall, where the backdoors line the complex. At this stretch of buildings, there weren’t any more service ladders like where Mando was going to meet you. 

Coincidentally, there were garbage units separating where that former landing zone was to where you are now. So when you skidded to a perfect stop, Leech rammed into the back and managed to jam his front end into the back of your second-seat attachment. Lovely. A flare of alarm chilled your back– feeling him far too close for comfort. 

The blaster you carry is holsted between you- he’d see if you turned to grab it. You’ll have to slip down for your vibroblade if he tries to grab you.

And of course now is when he comes out of the far backdoor– 

The Mandalorian burst from the firefight in the back door and -0ki whipped around the railing looking for you. The munchkin spots you first, and with your visor’s magnification, you see his smile- and subsequent squeal- which drags the Mandalorian’s attention to you.

From clear across the divide, his blaster raised and you leveled down with your handlebars: like he showed you.

“Hey now, friend! I was just returnin’ yer lovely thing to you!” the man’s voice flipped up several octaves in defense. 

The maglock between your bikes activated, and he dragged you in reverse ever so slowly, 

“Been runnin’ me and my crew like wild around the place. Been a fun chase- yeh must have yer hands full of this girl-”

Mando shot the man’s acceleration chamber till it hissed– stopping him in his tracks.

“You stay.”

You bashed the man’s face with a harsh elbow while his sights are down.

“YOU CRA-”, he recoiled with a bear swipe while you dismounted to try and fling him off– “--AH!”

But another shot grazed the man’s foot, making him slump onto his speeder.

He’s buying you time. 

Running through your mental catalog, you risked the man’s pain-induced split focus to detach your bikes from his panel’s shortcuts– but didn’t miss the Mandalorian’s next shout,

“Touch her and you lose your head next.”

You smirked under your visor. He’s gonna take him out anyway, you just know it. Swinging your ride back around to where you can remount never felt so good. 

Now, you really did try to avoid close calls like this as much as you can manage. But if nothing else, this run-in proved you could always learn a bit more, should spare reading up on grav separation, and maybe outrig yours a bit better when you get the chance…

A spared nod to the Mandalorian while you backed up– and his nod back– gave you the confirmation from the high ground that you needed. 

From your angle down low, your helm didn’t have the scope for it. But Mando’s does; you’re cleared to run the gap.

Against the exasperated Leech’s expectations, you jumped it. Sure enough, when you landed, no more jeers followed. Only yells of surprise from the guy’s crew, who were screaming around his form laid flat on the ground, some to call for a extinguisher droid for the speeder fire, another calling out for a medic…

Under the railing where Mando stands, blaster shots chink off his backplate again, signaling him to get out of there. A perfect land later, Mando mounted behind you and wedged his foundling between the both of you. 

“I take it you got it?” you asked, your modulated voice still perking up the Child’s ears.

He answered with arm wrapped tight your waist, “Got it. Drive.”

With the Mandalorian and the kid’s padded sling strapped tight to him, the three of you dipped off the ledge of the garage, leaving the bad vibes- and big paycheck -secured. 

–However, there's a gap in the antigrav you don’t account for. Turning sharp back to the main road, you slip off a level, and wipe out. Happens so fast, you don’t even breathe– just feel a punch to the gut where the front end of the bike lurches back against you when you curl forward around it as it spins against the momentum.

 The acceleration drones when it falls off kilter, the compressors go creepily silent, the metal plates grind against your eardrums, scrapes and crashes, and so do you.

The Child’s fine; if just a little dizzy when Mando curls away from his landed position behind you. Made of straight beskar steel everywhere it counts, he’s perfectly fine too. 

You? Not so lucky… You can count on one hand the amount of times over the age of fifteen where you’ve had a messy landing– and this makes the top ten. 

Crashing feking hurts. But you can still feel your legs; that’s good.

You rolled onto your back at Mando’s yell for you. He’s calling for you by name– louder and longer each time it leaves his vocoder– before you can reorganize your rattled brains enough to make any noise. A test of tilting your head proved you had range of motion. An adrenaline-high hand simply gave a thumbs up to him, even though your cheek burned. 

White hot sting radiated across your face even when you chucked your helmet off with gasps of breath, as fiery steam and dribbles of blood were dangerously seeping close to your eyeline. From your good eye squinting to the side, you caught the remnants of your smoking, stolen ride spun out amongst some employee’s stash of speeders. So much for returning that poor two-and-a-half speeder back in one piece…

The Mandalorian led you out of the hangar with a steady hand on your back- for support, this time. 

Even through the leather, you felt the pressure he gave as a buffer between you and any lingering watchers. Out in the bustle of a crowd should have provided a comforting white noise to be moving along in, fading into their routine existence through the foot traffic. But not this time; not with your ear still ringing and ears popping every time you swallow. Instead you were still shaking off the chills that creep sent when he was starting to block you in.

That hand on your back slid onto your waist, tucking you closer to him as you walked and merged with the crowd. Then, while your attentions moved to the booths, he slowed a bit and moved up to your arm.

"Are you alright?"

You lifted up, that soft tone a sharp contrast to what you’d just witnessed: as he made his threats and his kills like the hunter he was. It hadn't bothered you, in fact the protective nature of him made you feel slightly good. 

You smiled and fell into his side. You didn't realized how tightly you'd crossed your arms over your fractured helmet. His touch alone- brief as it was- encouraged you to release the tension.

"Yeah... Thanks for that." You sunk a bit. With every breath, the adrenaline ebbed more and more from you, and your cheek stung.

You both could bicker about how you had it covered another time. When there was some distance between this incident, maybe, but thanks was due here. There was no game of ‘I told you so’ between you; it was unspoken- but the care won out over any personal beef.  

Your ego is plenty bruised over having a wipeout in front of him. And yet, even as he'd brought you to your helmet, the first comment he made wasn't about how reckless you'd rounded that corner, or how you got yourself into a chase scene picking a petty fight… 

Mando was by your side the instant your hand fell limp after your cheery hand signal, and said something about how this helmet saved your life. In the moment, you were just sad its visor shattered. 

"Spent a lot of credits on the tint job…" you groaned. 

"You're bleeding. From the head."

"Fine, fine," you waved him off, "I'll spring for substance and not style next time."

"Thank Ashla her humor's intact," Mando bemoaned to the Child. "C'mon, let's get you up and out of here."

"Ow, shit– that's gonna bruise…  all down here, too.." 

"I've got you."

He looked ahead and motioned with a little nod to the corner of the side street. Once under a pavilion cover he loosened his hold on completely in favor of facing you.

"I'm.. I'm sorry that happened."

"Yeah," you sighed back, "Wasn't the finest show of my skills. Even stellar  have bad days too, see?"

"N-. Not that," he shook his head a little, "When I found you, out back."

You stood confused. "What, that a creep wanted to get in my pants? It's not the first time, and probably not the last." 

What started as a quip in your voice turned more genuine as you admitted the truth, 

"You uh… had that part right at the bar. How they're all the same, y'know."

He bristled, the turn of his helmet evident.

"That's happened to you before?"

You shrugged it off, a little surprised that he hadn't been privvy to that kind of scene.

"Just read the stats. It happens more often than folks care to admit, honey,” that sick feeling returned, the one that made even your toes lurch.The sourness of your memories made your broken helmet decidedly more interesting to look at,  “Dregs say whatever they want in these parts, really anywhere from Mid-Rim out. Don't like being told 'no' for the most part either… It just depends on how far they'll go to try and ‘convince you’." 

He really must be all business in establishments like that to never see those locales from another's perspective… But you grin back up at him while he stared speechless. 

"...I haven't ever had someone come to my rescue before.." you admitted. "That was– welcome. Appreciated."

As expressionless as the helmet made him, the slight tip of the head spoke wonders for you. Mando's hand rose to catch your top wrist and rubbed his thumb against it– solidifying those feelings he didn't dare speak in public. Without any facial features to go on, you relied on these touches and read into every little thing: chipping up your chin is an encouragement, a pat on the shoulder is a quick ‘atta girl’ or ‘stay put’ depending on the situation. And this little hold on your wrist spoke equal wonders, a hidden language of care:

 I’d do it again in a heartbeat, cyar’ika. Simply say the word, and it’s done.

Your pause was a quick one, and with no more words shared, he simply took claim of your hand, adjusted your fingers to work together, and led you back to the shipyard. 

The Child would peek his head out now that the action was over. He’d crane and lean up at you both as much as his sling could afford him– though he was most interested in what sight was in front of him: your hands now fitting together like they belonged. 

His buir was currently holding your hand, like he’s reached out to hold his own three fingered claw when they first met. He hoped this meant you'd stay, too. With his green-skinned hand, he could almost reach yours and add it to the pile.

......................................................................................................

The Mandalorian was quiet that night. The quiet itself was not unusual, no not that– setting a course and spending his time in the cockpit making the adjustments he wanted was a completely normal task for him. He always knew where to go, which route to plug into the navicomputer to coast comfortably in this hyperspace lane for the next few hours so he didn’t have to stay up there and babysit it. You left him to it; this brand of silence was nothing really out of the ordinary for him.

You thanked his strictly-taught discipline tonight. While he stayed busy, you were able to clean yourself up without an audience. 

After an indulgent sonic shower by his insistence, you fiddled around in the small kitchenette. The domesticity, the residential feel you’d fostered on the ship piece by piece was a sharp contrast to how the bar made you feel. The security of this place; you fall back into the feeling of ‘home’ here everytime you come up the ramp. So far tonight, that’s meant heating up a few bean rolls, monitoring the data cells you’d comped from your intel, and watching the kiddo roll around that little knob he was always sneaking off with. The minute after you’d realize the twist top of the gearshift throttle in the cockpit was missing, you’d smile. What thievery, at such a young age… at least your pilot didn’t have need of it yet.

You shook your head and laughed when the Mandalorian sighed behind you– clearly finding it, too.

"What am I gonna do with you, pal..." He wrestled with himself more than anything- begging the odd baby for reason, and picked him off the floor.

After setting him on the crate, the Mandalorian came up to the side of the sink. You didn't move much from what you were doing, but looked up when he just stood there quietly for too long.

"--What's up?"

“Really need to clean that.”

At the nod, you knew what he meant– the split brow and cheekbone.

Your instincts flared- hedge away. 

You fanned your face,  “I was just getting him settled first. It’s clean, I was just letting it cool down a minute.”

Your name left his lips. Firm as steady morning rain, and in a similar hush. You didn't need to see what color they were to know they were set on you and only you.

“Look, it’s only this much, see?--AH! Oof, nevermind..”

At your cheek’s lift, the fire came back. The move brought a tear to sting your eye. 

In a second, the Mandalorian came to your aid, a bracing hand on your waist as his hand cupped your chin to see the damage himself. He asked you to take another step towards the light, so you did. It seemed like he was tilting about a bit, even as he tested the touch around the roadburn. You winced at it each time- from both the poking and the bulb of the overhead glaring into your eyes. 

“It’s pretty bad, huh.” you mumbled out.

Guilt came through the sigh as a little exhale. You barely caught it, but it struck you in the stomach. The night, its quiet, and the privacy of hyperspace allowed you to bring your favorite secret to your lips–

“How bad is it –Din?”

“I can’t see it too well.” Mando -by his true name- told you, a skosh gentler. “My scanner doesn’t always allow me to see the debris from the clotting clearly. Hard to tell,” he weakly let go of your chin. 

“Damn,” you sniffed and looked about for the tabletop lantern back by the kiddo, “Do I need to get the handheld?”

Then, with a little look back to the hull where he sat occupying himself sleepily by the towel pile, your Mandalorian took maybe his largest risk ever:

“-I need you to close your eyes for me.”

“Huh?” 

“I need to see it better. Need– you to close your eyes for me to do that.”

Realization punched you again. Made your ears prick– and gooseflesh chill you.

You can't let him do this... You know he would. 

“We can get a medscanner, Din. It's not too late to stop somew-.”

“No,” he caught you again, “I can do it; need to do it. I just– I need to trust that you’re hearing me.”

It's less of an order and more of a curated ask, one that begged for assurance. This man would always do his best to help you– but you never imagined he'd go this far… what he's willing to do for you. 

It's the most vulnerable request he'd ever made of you; a Mandalorian's trustfall. 

Now? You took back every doubt you had in the bar about him. You looked him straight in the visor –while you still could.

“...I hear you, hon.”

It nodded back to you; just one, solemn motion.

“Okay. Come sit here.”

You obeyed and locked onto the sight of the child while the Mandalorian fell to a knee in front of you, then propped himself up on both to match. With prepped gauze and tools to extract the pebbley shards, you winced at the canister of bacta being shaken up in his palm. A gloved palm came to caress your thigh. It’s meant to soothe.

“It’s ok. Gonna get you taken care of.”

“Yeah,” you feigned a brave face. 

But every nerve ending fluttered at its tips when you felt it: his now bare hand brushing your good cheek,

“Do not open them, please.” you heard him whisper in the helmet. 

The already low-lit vision of the cabin fell dark at your will. And you nodded– any reaction of his, unseen.

With the latch release and depressurization, you knew the helmet was off. And without meaning to, your ears prickled at every breath, every swallow, every ounce of sound that man was making – now naked to the hallway of this ship.

“Okay,” a gentle baritone spoke in the air between you. It’s new, like a stranger.  “Hm– looks like we’re out of the stim solution, I don’t have any numbing cartridges. But I have the wipe kind. Gonna do that first.”

You hummed your agreement, then immediately whimpered at the first dab.

The Mandalorian froze and detached.

“It’s just a wipe…”

“Tell my face that.” You cringed. “Sorry, juss' stings.”

“I know,” he soothed, “T’sgonna be alright. I’ll make it as quick as I can. There. Gonna get these pieces out now.”

He did work pretty quickly now that he’s out from the helmet. You barely felt the edge of his tweezers as they scooped the wedges of asphalt from that high point of your cheek where the visor of your headgear had shattered. Before you could hedge away from one particularly deep poke, you heard him speak again, 

"I've been thinking about what you said earlier,” Mando peeped up from his quiet, “About... men who've said those things to you before."

You softened. Was he still thinking about it? That was hours ago.

"And.. I know I've said things like that. I just wanted you to know, I can't stomach the thought of you feeling that way. And I apologize if I have ever done so, even if you'd never said a word about it. If you want me to stop, I will."

Kriff, this man. You’d sooner lay across an electrode-fencing rig than ever make him stop. You sighed, and not simply from relief as you heard him switch tools.

He’s a man of few words, but not meaningless ones. The first compliment he ever paid you was about your fire- your heart, your will, and how strong you were and how you believed. Later when you had to doll up for that ridiculous undercover function, he finally spoke his mind in the moment and said you looked ‘stunning’. He calls you 'pretty thing' often; mostly when he's giving you a hard time. Truthfully he'd called you all sorts of things, both in Basic and not– which likely gave him this pang of guilt all the more.

But those endearments were just that: things that gave you joy, a peace and comfort with him. A sweet word here or there? It's born out of familiarity- the ease of tongue that comes with living in close quarters. The draw between you two is perfectly synchronous– it is an unexpected bond through bizarre shared experiences in an infinite galaxy that inevitably brought two rough-and-ready folks together and practically conjoined at the hip. To   

Your Mandalorian is not a man without faults, but he'd never once made you feel filthy.

"Oh stars above, you sweet man.." you chuckled a little, wrenching your palms from your shirt hem and blindly batted up in the air to find his arm. "You've never made me feel like that. It's different when it comes from you. You know that, right?"

He huffed out of his nose. Relieved, if his trigger fingers were any indication as they tilted your cheek again, 

"I didn't want to assume. You're always so collected. Talented, confident.. But you're– painfully polite."

You giggled at that. All of his touches that root you to the spot when you least expect them are anything but unwanted. Of course you were polite when he jumps the gun on grabbing you while out in traffic, or whipping a hand in front of you at a hard stop– but you've never once taken offense to that. 

With a tentative reach, his fingers brushed the line of fine little curls by your ear, relishing in your smile at the touch.

"I don't just want you in safe places. I can’t always promise our adventures will grant us ideal jobs," In the dark, you envisioned his solid, pitch black visor giving a barely there shake… "But I want you to feel safe when you're with me."

You turned your head and kissed the palm of it. 

"I do feel safe with you. You'd be the first to know if I wasn’t–NNGH!"

"Be still."

"Shit… m'working on it… this whole thing's new to me, y'know?" Your mouth wandered like your frantic mind, blitzed with stinging pain. "My visor's never shattered like that before," You clenched your fists against the picks made at your browline, "I just fill in the scuffs with some epoxy usually, but it's never broken like that. Frikkin’ hurt."

Mando hummed in sympathy and merely added, "Gotta fit you with some beskar one of these days."

"Oh, sure, for half my year's portion of – nehNGH!"

“Shh, I know. Last bit’s over. Just gonna clean it up before the spray.”

With a water’s dip and wrench out, Mando made a little cleansing exhale before dabbing over the whole area. Didn’t hurt as much of your face other than the center of the wound because of the sedative, but it certainly made your eyes squeeze shut. No worries of opening your eyes for a peek when it stung so badly.

Your gentle angel in beskar whispered a quiet ‘m’sorry’ for the repeated flare of pain. His nervousness was palpable, regardless of how confident he was at this job. A jostle of your leg at calf-height told you he was checking around for dry gauze. 

“Almost done,” he cooed, “You want a break?”

You hummed and gave your pitiful nod to agree. The barest turn of your head caused little pops in it from craning so much. The pressure would take a while to dissipate and you know that when you open your eyes, they’ll be bloodshot. But the pain would be over soon.

Pleased enough to give you a minute, Mando released your chin in favor of brushing another bit of hair back. Due to taking your own helmet on and off so much, the wisps of curls were bouncier than normal like this, with just enough length to give you some fun bangs. You smirked with a tight-lipped smile, as you did not want to bother and pull your cheeks too much. 

It’s kinda beautiful, this. Having this closeness, sharing in a horrible task but in the best of conditions imaginable– being cared for by the one you adored most. Who wouldn’t crave that when it’s what the heart screams for? 

And with this new secret shared between you, this loophole in Din Djarin’s creed… this isn’t a moment you took lightly at all. 

With a little shaky exhale of your own, you searched for his hand again in your bubble of darkness. Now, it met you fully–and linked your fingers together. 

And then, what shocked you the most: steady fingers supported your jaw again, and a slight breeze to cool down your enflamed cheek rushed across your face. 

Din is here. Kneeling before you and blowing on it– just for your comfort. 

You welcomed the cooling flow; your brows showed it. Every ounce of tension left you while dragging heartache into its warm spot. Emotion flooded every corner of the body. It nearly hurt: how it compressed your chest into submission and brought loving tears behind your eyelids.

You didn’t deserve him.

“We’re almost there, sweetheart. Finish line,” he squeezed your hand before lifting it to his lips. He spoke gently to the fingers, "Keep those eyes closed for me."

"Promise." You squeezed them again, bracing yourself for the final burn.

And there it was– freezing and sealing all at once. A white, blinding sensation like what you’d feel from a lightsource turning on overhead, but all over your skin. Each pore was touched by the bacta’s strange magic without warning- and perhaps it was better that way to get it over with. Your breathing raced in that short time until the spray set, but you made sure to mute any noise with angry focus. Fighting the aftertaste, only a small moan eeked from you while the medicine reacted after your nurse had done his job covering the area. Darling thing, he even shielded the mist from getting directly into your eyes. 

Mando's hands left you only to set its things down. This, only in favor, of cupping your face evenly to hold you still when they returned. They warmed what once felt so cold. His forehead met yours in a tender touch as your tears spilled over from the edge of your eyes. Not to worry, for his thumb wiped them up straight away. 

Hair caught in every which way brushed along your slightly damp brow- his. Matched yours, in a way. 

"All done.” his words danced just over your nose, “You can smack me away now, if you want." 

You gave a wet little laugh as you settled into him. Slapping him is unthinkable to you. “Never.”

No, this was a perfect feeling that you’d never wish an end to. His caresses surpassed that of strict medicinal care and turned intimate, rendering your insides limp and on their way to healing already..

The urge to finally cry hit when you parted… when you felt his lips meet your unharmed cheek in a plush, hot kiss.

You whispered in reverence: Din. Desperation for ‘more, please Starborn, more’, an equal measure of shock had you squeezing his wrist, pinning him to you, 

"Should– heh- sh-should you be doing that?"

He kissed you again. Again. Like he’s addicted to the touch, like it’s his favorite vice to pass the time; soft, loose, sighing up to your temple. You know he must be taking in this sight of you now, before the analytics of heat sensors block him from vivid color and dynamic shadows once the helmet returns. 

"Probably not,” he admitted without true remorse– his voice turned soft and delicious, "But I've always wanted to. And right now, I can–" he pulled away at your forehead, "--Should I stop?"

"Oh, please don't stop–"

Your urgency, his delight. Mando chuckled, and kissed your forehead next: with such love from him, you could never doubt it. Enjoy this, honey. Take it all in.

The moment could have lasted forever. You'd about blindfold yourself for the rest of your life, for all you cared. If he just kept kissing you; lower, lower, lower–

–your lips fit against his, and you burst like a case of firewhiskey spirits poured on a flame. It engulfed you both, and he latched on– to burn right there with you. 

Your hands flew to keep him close, fingers finding a hold through the whisps of his hair he kept short that curled in choppy, sweat-licked parts. He sighed so heavenly when you touched him skin to skin. And easy to please, it seems, since he matched you move for move– threading through your feather-soft waves like it was second nature for him to hold you so close. 

Oxygen and a too-full heart demanded you part for a breath, your pulse going rapid fire in your throat. 

“Thank you.”

“Thank me? Thank– I should be thanking you,”  For caring, for the space to exist at his side, to have his loyalty in your back pocket and in your very soul, “For… everything today.”

“Nothing special about that. You thanked me already.” he said so with such frankness. “We have each other’s backs. We’re on each other’s sides. No, this–” 

His shield dropped from your browline, replaced by his whisper over the lid of your eye–

“–this means everything, mesh’la.”

The honesty of this man wrecked you. 

You found yourself pressing your forehead into the space by his neck to hide. Your Mando petted through your hair like a lovestruck man- desperate and wanting and content with every intention to keep you there for the rest of Time. By how this killer matched your breathy giggles, you had a clue that he wouldn't mind that idea. 

"So," you broke the quiet with a small question, "is that what I can expect every time I get a punch to the face?"

Din huffed. 

"You start poking around for trouble, we're going to have an entirely different problem on our hands,” he mumbled back hoarsely, “Don't you dare get any ideas." 

“Even if they get me kisses?”

“Nothing’s worth you getting hurt, cyar’ika,” those indulgent lips pressed to your hairline before he reached down- to get his helmet. 

At the lean, you panicked a second, and flung back again with a rush for him to wait. 

At your word, he stilled for you to speak your peace. Happy lines greeted your fingertips as you caught the edge of his smile with a blind-man’s reach.

You fought through your elated headspace and begged, "One more?"

Praying to every heaven out there, you were blessed when Din graced your mouth again without any teasing. Kiss after kiss, you melted into each other in this place where nothing hurt– though who did the falling first, you genuinely didn't know. 

Must have been a hell of a numbing wipe. 

After breathless kisses later, stolen tokens as they were, you both felt and heard the Mandalorian shudder and he moan back,

"Gotta stop.." he flipped up the helm with expert precision. It found its home again with only another blip of static when the seal reanimated. "You can open your eyes now."

"Stop…" you managed your beating heart and blinked open your gaze, straight up to the reflected 'T'-shaped gap of his visor. The pupils that looked back at you were straight dilated. You asked out of the haze of your bliss, "Why ‘stop’?"

Still ungloved and with sleeves rolled up, the Mandalorian’s head lolled in a little shake. 

"If I didn't stop right then," Mando caressed your good cheek, "Don't know if I ever would…"

"Would that be the worst?" You hoped for the chance again.

Mando sweetly answered, 

"No.."

It was the kind answer he knew you wanted, to wish for more kisses from you. But he wasn't completely convinced. Not with that lilt in his voice that left a question to be answered. 

He slipped a hand around your waist,

"No, I think.. if I never saw your eyes again, that would be the loss I'd suffer the most.”

Lucidity came back by the moment, your sense of confusion officially returned.

“See me? But you just did, for the first time, right?”

“Couldn’t see those pretty eyes though.”

“Well, tough.” you sassed, “Now you know how I feel.”

You tried to make it sound bossy, but the dig left your mouth too sleepily for him to take it. Behind the metal, his rough rush of static resounded his chuckle.

To further prove the point, you mimic the motion you do for your eye contact removal with a bright, goofy smile,

"It's just retinas, you know,” you shrugged, “Mine don't even work."

"Your loss is my gain, all the same." Mando fell back to only one knee again, to get comfortable at your level. "I'm almost glad we didn’t pass a med droid in town, or else…” he curled an arm around you again, “--this might not have happened any other way. I count your poor excuse for headgear as my blessing this time."

You glanced at what was left of your helmet, but fell into good humor with his warmth bringing you close again.

“You’ll be all too glad to see me walking around a beskar cyclehelm, won’t you? Gonna take a while to find that much to make one, if you’re serious.”

“Oh, I’m serious,” the helmet nodded, chipping your chin for a moment, “But we’ll manage until we source it. Always do.”

You’re still reeling over this; over what this means, him offering you the most prized form of protection. To give you comfort by shedding down to his most vulnerable state. The complete faith he has in you by doing so... It gave your nervous anxieties ballasts on all sides. 

You’d keep your wits about you better next go round, so this doesn’t happen again… but you knew the word ‘partnership’ had a different meaning between you, from this night onward.

Din continued past your mind’s lovely spiral, 

“You won’t need to worry about finding a better replacement before we head to Bespin with this package; we'll just let you heal. No sense pushing it.”

"Probably for the best, yeah," you nuzzled back, "I clearly have issues keeping a helmet on my head as it is."

The helmet giving you a kiss of its own shook side to side. That gesture all but begged ‘what am I going to do with you’.

"So we stick in our lanes for now?” you whispered your hope, “...Try my luck and steal chances whenever I can?"

Instead of a quick nod, the man who’d just kissed you senseless gave you a promise again,

"We can work something out."

#the mandalorian x reader #din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #din djarin fanfiction #the mandalorian fanfiction #din djarin #the mandalorian #pedro pascal #this is self indulgent #din djarin is a sweetheart and a badass and i'll take no questions #it's a trustfall baby #close your eyes and leave it all behind #go where love is on our side #mando #mando x reader

[bhaalbaaby]

kinktober day 8

Title: Up To No Good (5600 words) Pairing: astarion/wyll/reader Warnings: nsfw, biting, but with more blood this time, anal, double penetration, alcohol A/N: imagine being between wyll and astarion. woof lol had to end it early because it's already so long lmao... kinks of the day: blood kink, double penetration, alternate universe

Read on AO3!

You really done it now. You try not to think about the upcoming trial as you hear your partner on the phone, trying to keep his voice hushed. You thought that if you found a loophole in his contract surely you could help him get free of his lousy job at Mizora Incorporated. How wrong you are. Wyll comes back, running his hand over his close-cut hair, the waves he worked hard on. He holds his phone in his fist, rolling it back and forth against his other calloused hand as he tries to come up with the words to say.

"Baby... We might be able to get out of this, but I have to go talk to Mr. Ancunin. Now."

Your brows furrow as you sit up on the couch, biting your bottom lip. "Now?"

He nods as he grabs his suit jacket. "Can I come too, since this is my fault?" You try to hide your desperation. Mr. Ancunin seems like a level-headed lawyer, but something about him is off. You don't trust Wyll to go there by himself, especially not in this upset state. He grimaces as he shrugs his jacket on. "I don't know. My dad barely got Astarion to approve of this meeting." You grab your shoes, quickly putting them on as you ignore Wyll's disapproval. You would make it right. You had to.

The ride to Mr. Ancunin's penthouse was quiet. The city traffic was mild and the cool air from Wyll's car kept you on edge. You wrap your cardigan around yourself tighter as you stare up at the tall buildings. When you agreed to date Wyll, you weren't thinking about the consequences of being a public figure's partner. Wyll Ravenguard, son of politician and general Ulder Ravenguard who was running for president. Gods, why did he have to be so handsome and down to earth? 

Mr. Ancunin had to live in the glamorous building you had to have seen. On your own, the doorman would have told you to mind your business and stop loitering, but with Wyll, he gives the doorman an easy smile as they let him into the parking garage. You mumble to yourself about nepotism, feeling your stomach do flips. You never met Wyll's lawyer and you rehearse your apology. Sorry, I snooped in his files, sorry I said there was a loophole, sorry I said that Mizora was corrupt on a public forum and called for justice for Karlach and Death to Zariel.

Karlach told you she appreciated it, but you got too passionate. Wyll's job is at stake, and his public persona under his father too. All because you got too passionate and caring. When Wyll parks, he hurries to your side to open your door. He still has his warm smile as he brings your knuckles to his lips. "Don't worry, my love. All will be okay." You don't want to doubt him but there's a gnawing in your stomach that makes your palms sweat. You wipe your hands on your dress as you step out of the car. 

Mr. Ancunin's home is very elegant and modern, not a mess to be found. He looks down at you, his glasses on the hilt of his nose as he raises a pale eyebrow. "Mr. Ravengard. You truly keep me on my toes. So does your little girlfriend." He waves his hand at you before letting you in.

Wyll keeps his hand on the small of your back as he smiles gratefully at his lawyer. "I appreciate it. I really do. So does General Ravengard."

Astarion's jaw tightens at the mention of Wyll's father, but he leads you both to his office. His desk is a dark mahogany that feels a bit dated with a modern black leather chair behind it, and his computer to the side with tabs open. You make out a Word document and an internet browser with the news plastering your face. You wince as you sit in the firm leather chair next to Wyll.

"You're lucky this will be an easy win as long as you two can behave." Astarion scoffs as he moves his computer in front of him. You feel like you're in the principal's office as he starts typing away. Wyll starts talking, but you tune him out, your mind racing. You just need to apologize and then everything will be done and over with right? Wyll reaches over and holds your hand gingerly in his hand. Astarion seems very annoyed as he continues to type, pushing up his glasses. You notice that his dark eyes aren't brown but a mesmerizing red.

You shift in your chair as you glance over at Wyll. He's so confident and professional. His whole life he's been trained for moments like this. You on the other hand fidget as you hope and pray that Wyll can handle it and that your meek apology for overstepping will make it all go away. To your surprise, Astarion doesn't even address you, his questions pointed towards Wyll. You trust in Wyll that he won't lie or make you look bad. He's so honest and earnest that you can tell Astarion is getting tired. You're making him work overtime anyway. You look around his nice office and figured he would be out and about enjoying the city this Friday evening.

Astarion clears his throat and Wyll squeezes your thigh. You blink, coming back to Earth. "Is there anything that you wanted to add, (Y/N)?" Astarion asks, his eyebrow raised. You shake your head no, giving him a shy smile before quickly adding, "I'm sorry for the chaos and confusion. I just wanted to speak about the injustices." Wyll winces and the corners of Astarion's lips turn downward.

"Thank you for that. You two are welcome to leave. This is plenty for me to work with. You should have the media and Mizora off your back by Monday." You both let out a sigh of relief and Wyll sits forward. "This calls for a celebration, I think."

Astarion smirks as he shrugs, "If this does go away and you two are officially off the hook, then we'll celebrate, Mr. Ravengard." You politely smile, still worried you may say something that will get disapproval from both again. "Of course. We'll be waiting by our phones awaiting the news, Mr. Ancunin." Astarion stands, chuckling. "Now, if you excuse me. I have plenty of emails to send."

You and Wyll spend the weekend down low, afraid that one slip-up would cause for another intervention with Wyll's dad or worse Mr. Ancunin. He seemed more intense since you at least think Mr. Ravengard likes you. Wyll is better at keeping his worries hidden as he continues with his routine, going to the gym, talking to his friends albeit on the phone rather than in person, and spending the evenings with you. You two spent Saturday night in bed and Sunday too nervous to have sex unsure about what Monday would bring. 

Astarion calls Wyll in the morning when you two get ready to go to work. "They've accepted the terms so long as you two don't bring it up anymore." Wyll pulls away from the phone, muting it as he glances at you. "We have to for Karlach's sake."

Your nostrils flare wishing you could get better terms for your friend but you nod, not wanting to cause more discomfort for her. "That's amazing, Astarion. We should celebrate!" Astarion chuckles as he replies, "You two should do that."

"No, it's my treat. You helped us when you didn't have to." Wyll is so kind and genuine. You always admire him for that. Astarion sighs, "Well, as long as it's not too late. It is a Monday night and I have a lot of work I need to do since I was busy with you two." Wyll's warm smile is contagious as you find yourself smiling along, not wanting to spend time with Mr. Ancunin, but as long as it makes Wyll happy.

You choose a simple black dress as Wyll sticks with his business casual black button-down and black pants. Gods, if you only had more time, you would have jumped his bones, especially when he puts the matching jacket over your shoulders, his cologne still lingering. You make sure you give him bedroom eyes as you get in his car, letting your hand linger on his thigh as he drives. "This will be a quick thing, don't worry, (Y/N)," Wyll says, giving you a knowing smile.

You roll your eyes as you check your lipgloss. "You always say that but then it ends up being a networking thing for you and your dad." You hope it doesn't sound snarky as you quickly add, "But Astarion also will want to make it quick too since we're a handful."

Wyll nods, "We should be open to all opportunities tonight." You wonder what he means by that as you ride the whole way in silence. 

The bar is not that busy as professionals usually don't drink on Mondays. You and Wyll arrive before Astarion and you find a small booth towards the back away from patrons. Wyll orders for you both, knowing what you like. You lean against him as you wait. Besides this little mishap, you don't know anything about Astarion. You hope he would be relatable and want to talk about something other than work. Wyll rubs a gentle pattern on your arm as the drinks arrive. "I hope he shows. It'd be embarrassing if we got all dressed up and he didn't come." Wyll jokes, though his usual smile is nowhere to be found.

You peck his cheek. "Of course he will. Your dad is a big client." You note as you see the silver-haired man come into the bar. Outside of his lawyer persona, he could be handsome, and charming. You see him at a place like this and feel lucky he chose you. You cringe at the thought as you take a sip of your drink, grateful Wyll knows you so well. 

"The man of the hour." Wyll announces as he stands, shaking Astarion's hand. Astarion chuckles, rolling his eyes as he shakes Wyll's hand, reaching down to shake yours as well. "I just pulled a few strings of a couple of important people to make issues go away." Astarion states as he sits down across from you.

The waitress is quicker this time to the table to get Astarion's drink. You're right in that he has a certain aura around him that people are drawn in. You can even feel it on yourself as you drink more and stare at him. He orders an expensive red wine and the waitress leaves a bit flustered when he says he doesn't want any food. She didn't even offer that to you two. "So, do you always offer celebrations like this to all of the people who assist with cleaning up your problems?" Astarion asks, his eyes are intense.

Wyll's smile is easy as he nods, "Not usually with a drink, but you've been working hard, Mr. Ancunin, and we needed to relax. Seemed like a good excuse to get out of the house."

The waitress is so fast with Astarion's wine, it's almost startling. "Thank you dear," Astarion says, his voice almost a purr. She giggles as she asks if he needs anything else. You and Wyll share a look as Astarion says no. "Who knew you had such a pull on the ladies," You say cheekily once the woman is out of earshot.

Astarion rolls his eyes as he sniffs his wine. "I get who I can. And she may get lucky tonight." There's a sadness you can't place in his tone.

Wyll lifts his glass as he smirks, "We'll drink to that." His eyes soften as he takes a sip of the wine. "I won't lie to you two. I have neglected myself this weekend handling this issue."

"Oh no, I'm sorry to hear that." You frown, holding your cup in both of your hands as you lean forward, the dress dragging a bit lower to reveal your cleavage. It's on accident as you sit back to readjust, but Astarion's eyes still linger. "Is there anything we can do to help ease your pain?" Wyll asks.

An idea flickers in Astarion's eyes and he tuts. "Well, there is something, but it's far-fetched. I would require you both to trust me."

"Of course. We do," Wyll replies quickly, also leaning forward, his expression serious.

Astarion smirks as he sits back, "Maybe we should see how tonight goes."

You don't like that answer, glaring at him. "Why can't you tell us now?"

Astarion clears his throat before taking another sip of his wine. "Well, you two should know before you find out from someone else." He lowers his voice as he leans into the table. You lean in as well, glancing over at Wyll. "I have a special condition that requires a controversial substance."

"Weed? Acid? Coke? Heroin?" The list spills out of your head before you can stop yourself.

Wyll gives you an incredulous look while Astarion looks amused. "No, not that. Worse." You raise your eyebrow as you can't think of anything worse besides meth, but he seems too classy for a meth addict.

"Blood. I haven't been able to feed on anyone in a tenday." Your looks of shock do not surprise Astarion as he sighs, "I'm glad I was able to operate coherently as I did, but I can't go that long without blood."

"You're a vampire?" Wyll asks, trying to keep his voice low.

Astarion nods, sipping his wine. "That's one word for it. Blood deficiency is what I call it to keep people's alarms low." He laughs to himself. "But this is why I said we should see how the night goes because you're both looking at me like I've grown another head. I'm not like the ones on TV which are stereotypical at best, offensive at worse." He scoffs, his fangs more apparent.

You swallow hard as you glance at Wyll. You could say no. You have to say no.

"How much do you need?" Wyll asks instead, the goodness in him still shining through.

Astarion's eyes light up as he smiles. "Only just a bite. You'll barely notice that I took a sip."

You take a long drink of your alcohol, feeling the effects when you put the cup down. Expensive stuff increases the percentage in just a cup, you think as you sigh. "What's the worst that could happen? We give blood at the blood bank, so why not?" You say to Wyll, feeling the liquor loosen your tongue.

Wyll shrugs, "But we can change our mind if it's a bit too much."

Astarion nods as he scoots closer to you both. You feel claustrophobic in between them as Astarion rests his hand on your thigh. "Yes, I won't go further than you two want." You can tell he wants to kiss you both, but that waitress is still watching, waiting.

"We can go back to my place and see where this night goes." Astarion suggests. You both nod, flagging the waitress over as Wyll handles the tab. 

Astarion's room is a contrast to his office, his bed a California king with soft white sheets and silvery patterns on the fluffy duvet. "Don't worry about getting it messy. It's seen plenty." Astarion says as you two get on the bed, watching him carefully. Wyll gently bites his lip, reaching for your hand. You wonder if he'll stop before anything happens, but Astarion approaches him first, their lips meeting. You're slightly jealous watching as Astarion kisses your partner. Wyll's grip on your hand tightens as he pulls you closer. You kiss his neck, hearing his moan muffled against Astarion's mouth. He lets go of your hand as Astarion comes for you next, his kiss more practiced than yours. You try your best to match his passion, feeling hands on your chest. The kiss isn't as long as Wyll's as Astarion returns his lips.

You watch as Wyll and Astarion's tongues intertwine, Astarion's hands massaging your chest through your thin dress, Wyll's hand running along Astarion's thigh. You moan softly, tugging your dress lower, giving both of them full access to yourself. Astarion pulls away as Wyll grabs your breast, his lips quickly wrapping around your nipple, making you squeal.

Astarion grabs your chin, leading you to kiss him. His lips are soft and inviting as your hand rests on Wyll's head, fingers running along his soft waves. He pulls back, turning to Astarion. "Is this what you do with all the people you bite?" He asks as he helps you out of your dress. You feel like both of them are overly dressed as you lie back on the soft bed in your panties, wondering which one will offer you their cock first and where.

Astarion chuckles as he presses kisses down your torso, burying his face between your thighs against your lacy panties. "Not often. You two are the first couple in a while. Both of you will satisfy me." He states as you squeal feeling his warm mouth against the fabric. Wyll smiles down at you as he undoes his pants. You watch with hungry eyes seeing the imprint of his member tighten in his underwear as he slips the pants off.

"As long as we don't tell anyone." Wyll adds, leaning down to kiss your moaning lips, your legs wrapping around Astarion's curly head. He lifts his head, pressing kisses along your inner thigh.

"Of course. We'll all sign NDAs once this is all over." He jokes as he slips your panties to the side, his tongue flat as he laps at you. You arch your back as your hands make quick work of Wyll's briefs, your hands wrapped around his thick cock. He tenses, the muscles on his stomach contracting as you stroke him.

You try to ignore Astarion as you glance up at Wyll, his handsome face looking towards the soft-lit ceiling as he bites his lip. Your brows furrow as Astarion suckles your clit, your mouth dropping. You bring Wyll's cock closer to your face, knowing your hands won't do much work as you start trembling.

Wyll leans down, tugging at your nipples as you slowly let his cock fill your mouth. You always love how he feels inside of your mouth, you never found yourself getting tired of sucking him off. Your tongue runs up and down his length before letting him go as far as you can take him, gagging slightly. Your hands rest on his thighs as your foot runs up and down Astarion's back, your hips rocking against his mouth.

Astarion pops his head up, slipping a finger into your hole. "That's not fair," He purrs as he watches you pleasure Wyll.

"What's not?" Wyll asks, trying to keep his voice even as you moan around his cock. "That you're handsome, rich, and have a perfect cock. I bet you'll even bottom for me." Astarion rolls his eyes before returning his tongue, the tip so sharp against your clit. You remove your mouth to cry out, digging your nails into Wyll's hips.

"I'm sure yours is also great Astarion. You're distracting (Y/N) though." He says, slightly pouting as he guides your mouth back, his fingers tugging on your hair as he takes over, ignoring your whimper around him, Astarion's fingers picking up speed.

He laughs softly as he removes his mouth. "She tastes glorious. I'm sure you two have lots of fun." He teases as he presses kisses on your panties, avoiding making you cry out again. You wish you could join their banter, but your brain goes to mush when Astarion leans up, his thrusts consistent as his mouth wraps around your nipple, his tongue flicking. You breathe heavily through your nose, glancing up at Wyll who grunts softly. You feel spit coat your chin, the moans getting lost by the wet noises between your thighs and your mouth.

"I think she's ready for you." Astarion states before gently nibbling your breasts, making you moan louder.

"Are you sure?" Wyll asks, glancing over at his lawyer, his hands now rubbing your clit. You rock your hips, trembling. You wonder who he pleases most of the time and how lucky they were. Sometimes you doubt how you can handle Wyll most of the time, so lucky to have him, but to have him and Astarion at the same time? You feel bad that your body would give out before they both get a turn.

"I want to see how good her mouth can be. She's making you look so delicious." He explains, bringing his fingers to his lips.

Wyll chuckles leaning down to kiss you quickly before going between your thighs. He unbuttons his shirt, tossing it on the floor. His fingers tug your panties down as Astarion takes Wyll's previous spot, also taking off his shirt. He isn't toned like Wyll, but you can see he works out sometimes from his arms. You're overwhelmed, unsure to look at Wyll who puts your thighs on either side of him before deciding to turn you over, deciding on where to look.

You look up at the pale vampire who smiles down at you. You undo his belt as you feel Wyll rub his cock between your cheeks, palming your ass. "You look very pretty like this," Astarion says to you, running his fingers gently through your hair as you try to keep your mind from scrambling more.

Astarion's cock isn't much different than Wyll's besides being uncut and not as girthy but makes up for it in length. Gods… You briefly imagine both of them inside of you and a shiver runs down your back as you feel Wyll pull back and the small rip of a wrapper. You don't waste any more time, bringing the cock to your lips. Astarion breathes heavily through his nostrils as you gently suck on his tip.

You roll your tongue along his tip pulling away as Wyll slowly thrusts in. You push your ass back towards him as he starts his pace, taking his time as he watches you struggle with sucking Astarion. "First-time threesome?" He asks as he gently pets your head.

You nod as you stroke him. "B-b-but I'll do my best to please you, Mr. Ancunin." You say, ignoring the pleasure that flushes your skin each time Wyll thrusts in. You run your tongue along Astarion's cock, his hand guiding you lower to his balls. You suck on them as your hand continues to stroke him, focusing on the tip. He thrusts into your hand, keeping you lower still. Wyll's hands grip your hips as he picks up his pace, grunting. Your toes curl as you clench around him.

"Does she come fast for you, Wyll?" Astarion asks breathily as you moan around his balls. Wyll chuckles as he spanks your ass hard.

"She does. Says my cock is the best she's ever had." Heat comes to your cheeks as they talk about you like you're not there. "She's struggling hard." Astarion notes as he finally lets you up, using your mouth for his pleasure. You moan around his cock as he continues to fuck your mouth, trying to match Wyll's pace as he fucks you hard, spanking you with every other stroke. "But she's a good girl who waits," Wyll states, gripping your ass hard as he spreads your cheeks, watching as your asshole contracts.

"Are you a good girl?" Astarion asks as he stuffs your mouth. You whine, trying to nod your head as he grips your head, enjoying the gagging that escapes your throat. You don't know how you're keeping yourself together now as Wyll hits your spot over and over, beckoning for you to come with each stroke, but you hold yourself back giving all your attention to Astarion's thrusting cock.

"Neither of you can come yet. I want the honors." Astarion states after a while. He pulls his cock, rubbing his length on your wet lips before sitting back, watching as Wyll pounds you into the soft bedsheets.

"Wyll, be a darling and suck me off. You can still fuck your girlfriend." He stands, bringing his member to Wyll's lips. You take the opportunity to grab a pillow to muffle your moans as Wyll is so close to bringing you to orgasm. You wish Astarion would just fuck you now so he could say he made you come.

Your nails dig into the pillow as Wyll slows just a bit, wet noises coming from his mouth. You turn your head slightly to watch as he glances up at Astarion, his lips perfectly positioned around Astarion's pink tip. You look away quickly, feeling yourself get even more turned on, your legs trembling.

"Don't you dare come, (Y/N)." Astarion growls as he watches. You squeeze your thighs together as you think of something else, not the way Wyll's lips look wrapped around Astarion's cock, the way his cock buries itself deep inside, your walls clenching around him. You think of Astarion's sharp teeth and their true purpose and somehow that turns you off enough to let Wyll continue to pommel your ass.

Wyll stops soon, laughing as he removes his mouth. "I can't come either. She's so wet." He comments giving you another smack. "Another few strokes and I'd be the one in trouble."

Astarion chuckles as he gets down. "Turn over, (Y/N). It's my turn." You're delighted at the words as you obey. You need to release. He kisses you quickly as Wyll sits back on the bed, "Can I watch so I don't get worked up?" His question is sweet and Astarion rolls his eyes. "Sure. You can also make it tough for (Y/N) too."

Wyll's eyes light up at the suggestion and you mentally curse him while you whine. "Make it tough?" You ask as Astarion reaches for a condom. "Of course. It's fun to make you wait for your orgasm." Astarion notes as he puts the protection on.

You flare your nostrils as Wyll lies next to you. "You're so pretty, baby. I'm glad I get to share how pretty you get when you're like this." You roll your eyes at Wyll's compliment as he tilts your head up towards him, Astarion pulling your hips closer. You break the kiss, and look into Astarion's red eyes as he slowly thrusts inside. You moan as Wyll slides his hand down between your legs, rubbing your swollen clit.

"Oh, fuck. Fuck you." You cry out, holding on to his shoulders as your legs wrap around Astarion's hips. Both of them chuckle as you become a moaning mess, closing your eyes tight as you clench around Astarion. Your stomach tightens as you try your best to not come instantly.

Wyll leans down, kissing your neck, resting his head against yours as you pant against his chest. "You're doing a good job taking his dick, baby. You made my fingers so wet already." Wyll whispers in your ear as his circular motions quicken, Astarion's strokes so deep and precise.

"Gods help me," is all you can say as you say as your legs tighten around Astarion's waist. Astarion laughs as he leans down, grabbing Wyll's firm ass.

"She's not gonna last." He comments, as your hips rock against him, breathing heavily.

"What should we do about that?" Wyll asks, his voice always so earnest. Astarion glances down as he pounds you into the bed, finding where you're most sensitive.

"Fuck her ass. I know she can't handle us like this, but imagine how she'll be with both of us?" His eyes dance as you continue to bury your face into Wyll's slightly sweaty chest. He chuckles as Astarion slows, "Lube is in my dresser."

Oh, he's serious.

You glance at Astarion, the madman. Wyll kisses you one last time before going to get the lube. "Yes sir." Once Wyll rolls off the bed, Astarion's arms scoop you up, making you cry out as he bounces you on his cock.

"You taste as sweet as you sound." Astarion teases as you bury your face in his neck, holding on for dear life. The sound of skin on skin fills the room with Wyll rummaging around to find the lube.

"Don't you come, darling? It's not time yet." He growls as his fingers dig into your ass. You curse as you glance over at Wyll.

"Hurry up!" You cry, the faith in yourself to behave and not make a mess on Astarion's cock as the new angle has his cock nestled against your g-spot. Wyll laughs as he shakes his head. "You hear how close she is, Astarion?" Wyll asks as he returns to the bed with the little bottle. Astarion leans down, pressing kisses against your sweaty neck.

"Absolutely. I think I'll bite her once you're in." He purrs as he leans back slightly as you cry out, feeling Wyll rest behind you. You try to relax as Astarion slows, sucking on your sensitive skin. It's going to hurt no doubt. You've been bitten before, but not for blood, to feed.

You feel Wyll press his now-slicked cock against your puckered hole as Astarion stops, allowing Wyll to fill you. You tense, his thick shaft hot as he stretches your hole.

Your mouth drops open, a scream catching in your throat as Wyll lets you rest your back against him, his hands massaging your chest. Astarion smirks as he leans forward, picking up his pace as you struggle against Wyll in your ass. Your mouths meet as he holds your legs higher.

Wyll groans as he ruts against you, twisting and massaging your nipples as your body contracts around both of their cocks. You close your eyes tight, your body heating up as Astarion pulls away, peppering kisses down your neck.

"Be prepared for a gush, my dear Prince. Biting tends to make people..." He pauses to kiss your neck again, grinding his hips as flush as he can as you toss your head back against Wyll's shoulder. "In rapture."

Wyll's arms flex around you, expecting the worst as he rocks his hips. You're getting used to his girth in his angle now that Astarion slows down, kissing your neck and getting you ready for whatever a vampire bite feels like.

His teeth are like hot icicles sinking into your skin like butter. The scream that erupts from your body seems otherwordly as Wyll holds you still, blood running down your neck and collarbones as Astarion's thrust is languid. You close your eyes tight, feeling lightheaded. His mouth is warm as he continues to feed, moaning as warm gushes of blood fill his mouth. Your arms that wrapped around his shoulders start to go limp. How much did he need?

Wyll also slows as your breathing shallows, Astarion showing no signs of stopping. "Hey Boss, I think that's enough," Wyll says pushing Astarion off.

Astarion's pupils are blown as he leans back, taking in the sight of you barely holding on to consciousness and Wyll's suddenly sobered-up look of concern. Astarion laughs as he licks the blood that runs down your neck, hiking your legs up again as he picks up his pace, harder this time, arousing more moans from your lips.

"I'm sorry pets. It's been a while since I've had someone as tasty (Y/N)." He says as he licks his lips, leaning forward to kiss Wyll. Wyll hesitates before kissing him back, your blood still on Astarion's tongue. You watch them through half-lidded eyes, trying to regain your energy as your torture continues.

Wyll curses under his breath as he pushes you towards Astarion, his thrusts fast, your body barely able to catch up. "Yes, pound her. Oh Gods, feel how she clenches around us." Astarion purrs, holding you up as you withstand Wyll's brutal pounding, your cries echoing through the penthouse. Wyll's hand clutches your breast and the other slides down to your hips as your ass smacks against him until he moans, holding himself still. You hold on to Astarion tight until Wyll finally pulls out, shaking his head. "Fuck, my love..."

He rests on the bed as Astarion also pulls out, resting you back on the bed. You're slightly annoyed that the bite isn't as erotic as you thought, not making you orgasm, but you hide it by kissing your sweetheart with the look of bliss on his face.

Astarion isn't eluded like Wyll, getting him cleaned up by removing the condom and handing him a towel. "You should get your girlfriend off," Astarion says with a wink as he throws the condoms away. Your eyes widen as you shake your head.

"I think I need a nap." You reply quickly, trying not to make sudden movements. He rolls his eyes, returning to the bed, pulling your hips back to him as he leans down. Wyll sits up, watching, raising his eyebrow. "You didn't do enough, Astarion?" There's a slight edge to his voice, that he plays off with a smile.

"I don't think we did enough," Astarion says, kissing your ass before burying his tongue between them, your moan slipping out before you can catch yourself. Wyll watches, sighing as he guides your hand back to his cock. "Then we'll have to start again," Wyll says after a moment, guiding your face up to his.

#astarion #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate iii #bg3 astarion #astarion x wyll #wyll x reader #wyllstarion #kinktober #october prompts #nsft #writing #wyll ravengard #astarion x reader

[leebrontide]

This is not gonna win me a lot of friends on here but seriously a lot of y'all are irritating me lately with your gleeful piracy posts.

"Poor people deserve stories, to!" You're right. 100% Go on gumroad. There are a ton of authors, myself included, who are giving away free books there. Many of them are from the very marginalized backgrounds y'all claim to want to champion. Look for newsletter giveaways. there are literally so damn many ways to get books that come from creators who have consented to give them away. Oh, but you think anyone should be entitled to the exact book they want without paying for it? the popular book from the big publisher? That's a different thing. That's a different thing that continues to uphold ideas that the mega-corporations are the only source for good stories, that only stories vetted by the companies you claim to be rallying against have value.

"Piracy is archiving!" Archiving is archiving. I can't speak to how it works with indie videogames or what have you, but with books, this is absurd. Ok, say you illegally download a book. If it's from a huge publisher, this is nonsense cause a ton of those were printed. It is not in danger if vanishing. Say it's from a small publisher- you have now decreased that publishers chances of of continuing to print and distribute the book. You are making the book harder to locate in the future. You want to make sure a book doesn't vanish? Pay for it. If it vanishes utterly off the internet when the author dies or whatever, then yay, you have a copy and can maybe help get it back in circulation. Not paying for the book didn't help with that. You can help save an out of circulation book later just as well if you paid for it.

"Piracy is counter corporations!" See point 1. Also, a lot of the sites where you all are pirating fiction do just as much scraping of indie, self-pub, and small press books. Robin Hood wasn't stealing from the poor to give to the poor. I personally know an author whose publisher dropped them mid series because the book wasn't selling, who later found a piracy site with WAY more downloads of her book than there were legal sales. She gave up publishing after that.

This isn't sour grapes, folks. To my knowledge, my own books have never been pirated, and to be honest, over the years I've sold as many copies as a regular mid-list author with a pig publisher.

But I have watched so many authors- not wealthy people- have their work stolen from them. Many of them are disabled and really struggle with other kinds of jobs. They can do this work, but they can't make money, and this is honest to god a big part of why. I feel like people don't believe this. If you don't hang around authors maybe it's tempting to buy in to the hollywood idea of an author.

If you don't think you're entitled to demand free labor from a plumber, then why do you think you're entitled to demand free labor from an author or artist? Is it because you don't have to look them in the eye? Is it because you feel like you can get away with it? Is it because you've fallen for the fantasy that authors are wealthy people living glamorous lives, and their labor doesn't count because they're so lucky to be making a living with their art?

I don't know. And please don't defend this to me.

Just go read free books, if you can't afford to buy them and don't have library access. Or at least stop rubbing what you're doing in the faces of all the creators on this website who put a lot of hard work into the things they make.

Reblogs are nice, but reblogs accompanied by cheerful endorsements of stealing things which aren't freely given do not make for an ideal community.

[theheromira]

Nimona Movie appreciation post (Part 2 of idk how many)

Sooo, here's part 2 ^^ another pic for attention ;)

the whole first interaction of Nim and Bal is pure gold, also that "jumpscare" with the music in the background, like I already said: Christophe Beck (and everyone in the music department of the movie for that matter) did a more than amazing job

"Did it bleed a lot? Did they let you keep the old one?" Nimonas expression just XD and Bal also answering her with a "No"

Loving Nims lil laugh when she says "Little girls?" and her just casually stopping the saw with her arm

the whole interaction with that little girl/how old he thinks she is

you'd like it to stay that way, yeeaah sure, you gotta just have that one 1000+ years old child

I love how Bal says kebab

also: where did Nim get the paper, there is some gold symbols etched in, almost looks like stationary from somewhere?

"Up here"

the whole to-be-your-sidekick-speech

also great foreshadowing with the phoenix and stuff

also Bal regretting his life choices while Nim does her lil speech and then him being jumpscared by the plate she throws against the wall

also that is a veeery clean plate for that kind of dreary place but hey, I'm also a very picky person when it comes to plate (and utensil) cleanliness (just gastronomy things in my case I guess lol)

Bals face after "Or we could just… talk"

The punchable face scene lol

all the little details of the innocence-wall

"Yeees!", looks at shattered bottle he wanted to kill the intruder with (probably), throw it away

Love how she seems disappointet that he isn't a villain but sshe already decided to adopt him, so it doesn't really matter to her anymore if he is or not

"It's complicated" 1x

Character-in-a-movie-says-he-won't-do-something-only-to-do-exactly-that-in-the-next-scene-clicheé (which I always love btw)

"I love lunch" lol same

the Director is such a good actor but in retrospect I really noticed how she speaks about Bal ("someone like you could be a hero" I mean, how that flew over my head the first time around I don't really know) or to the other knights ("you act like common children" as if there is a difference between normal children and those of commoners/as if commoners are not worth as much as them)

spotting Nim in rat-form when Bal asks for a chance blew my mind the second (or third) time I watched the movie

No matter what you try, if people think one way about you, you're always gonna be that in their eyes is a lesson I also learned when I was really young and ngl that's probably one of the things that made me be a completely different person when I'm not on the internet, soo… that's also one reason I can relate and why I love this movie so much

"I gotta hand it to ya.", she says and hands him his arm lol

Violence is also a code

loving the little noise she makes after she says "You know there's no toilet in there"

the whole murder 'em/ hide scene

"That's a hard No" made me laugh way to much

that whole break out scene until "They were like this when I got here" lol best break out scene of all time

Nims joke with the club of the one armed XD also the lights reflecting in her eyes as a little foreshadowing that she's not human

Nim casually knocking out that one knight with the axe

Bal reacting to her plan like: "Of course. The old something, something, something, we win." As if he alreay knows that plan and you can't convince me that that wouldn't be because Amb likes/ liked/ used to make plans like that

#netflix nimona #nimona #nimona ballister #nimona film #gay knights #nimona spoilers #goldenheart #appreciation

[chocodile]

art fight???? how???

hey, could you explain a little about the art fight thing? i want to fight people !1!1!

Art Fight is an art gifting and trading game! It's been running in some form or another since (quickly checks about page) 2007 apparently but I've been playing it since 2016.

The way the game/event works is outlined here on the site's About page. Basically you just pick other users and draw free art for them of their characters--art you make for other people is called "attacks", and if you're lucky, they'll get "revenge" by drawing something back for you of one of your own characters, too!

There's a light framework of "teams" and "points" overlaid on top of that "draw art of others' OCs" concept to gamify it and give it a fun aesthetic (with team themes like sun vs moon, vampires vs werewolves, etc), but there are no prizes for the winning team, you can freely draw stuff for people on your own team, you can switch teams at any time, and... honestly most users don't really care about teams or points and are just in it for the OC gift art aspect of it.

I'm a huge fan of it because Art Fight feels like one of the last places on the internet that is by and for artists exclusively. On Art Fight you can openly relish in the fact that you're obsessed with one of your characters, or show off this idea for a cool story and setting you want to turn into a novel someday, or proudly display the fact that you've been worldbuilding in-depth dragon lore for a decade and be totally and completely surrounded on all sides by people who not only get it, but also are all doing the same thing. It's also a great way to give some love and support to beginner artists.

Some tips on how to have a better Art Fight experience:

Don't go in with the expectation that you'll get a ton of art, especially your first year. Your main goal should be to make gifts for other people.

If you are hoping to get "revenges" back, try to "attack" people who are definitely playing this year (as in, have drawn at least one attack this summer) but who aren't already swamped with a ton of attacks to "revenge" already. (Attacking only very popular/professional artists who get more attacks then they could ever possibly keep up with will leave you feel disappointed... that said, it's arguably worth attempting a few, just in case you get lucky, because that's how I got a drawing from Shoomlah, one of my childhood art idols!)

If you have an art blog, promote your Art Fight stuff to your followers there so they know you're playing. Playing with a group of friends is also more fun than playing solo 'cause you can always attack each other if you're not getting many revenges. Leaving nice comments on other people's characters and art can also help make you more visible/leave a good impression if you're brand new to the game.

Points and teams seriously don't matter at all, even a little. I suggest not paying them any attention at all beyond picking the team theme you think is cooler.

It's best to at least skim a character's profile and rules before drawing them. Not only does it help you get a better feel for the character, sometimes people put useful design details there instead of on their refs.

One more thing: Don't take Art Fight too seriously! You and everyone else are here to have fun. Don't get hung up on art "quality"--lots of people (including myself) are only doing headshots or sketches. Don't get upset if someone forgets a detail on your character or doesn't draw them quite "right". Don't get hung up on numbers or "ratios" or feel too stung if someone doesn't comment on or revenge something you draw for them. After all, Art Fight is for all types of artists, including young artists who don't fully understand netiquette rules yet, busy adults with full time jobs, people with disabilities that make it hard for them to communicate or hard for them to type or leave them with limited energy... etc. That doesn't mean they didn't appreciate what you drew for them!

Wow, I wrote too much. I should probably stop typing and go draw something for Art Fight before it gets too late in the evening!

TL;DR: Fun art gifting game. Great to rub elbows with other creatives for a month! Feels like an online convention of sorts! A+! Would recommend.

#art fight #art fight 2023 #my 'e' key is going and I am suffering immensely for it #typing is so difficult at the moment #my band aid fix worked for a while but I think I will have to disassemble my laptop #and replace the entire keyboard #man. I usually don't have to do that until the fan starts going out at like the 4 year mark. #but this keyboard situation is really draining my sanity every time I type anything at all #anyway #anon #replies #not an art post #also sorry for not answering messages... been very busy... then art fight started... now keyboard broken... #universe does not want me to answer messages it seems

[sexydreamgirl]

Here are some manifestation ideas for those wanting to test the law or who's struggling to figure out what to manifest (I've put my personal favorites in bold)

- a different eye/hair color

- seeing a red balloon

- a food you've been craving

- the ability to change anything about your look at a moments notice (doesn't have to be limited to clothes. Can also be things like your hair length/color, your size, etc)

- have any super power that can be (and the ability to control them)

- your drink never goes flat, gets cold, gets hot, ice never waters down the drink, etc

- getting that job you want

- being that character you've always wanted to be like (not necessarily just looking like them)

- no pain when you get a tattoo or piercing

- tattoos and piercings heal immediately and never get infected

- time travel (go to a different decade just to see what it's like, or to go to a concert you missed, or meet someone who isn't alive in this timeline)

- moving to your dream home

- that thing you were eyeing in the store but didn't get

- being in a movie/tv show or have worked on said film

- being friends with a famous person (counting internet celebs like YouTubers/streamers)

- things you order online are shipped within a day no matter when it was ordered or what shipping option you chose

- your card is never declined no matter how much money was on it in the first place

- that show you love never got canceled

- you always win in card/board/dice games

- getting into the college you want

- graduating early

- the lip color of your favorite lipstick

- having no hair grow in places you usually shave

- bigger/smaller body parts if you catch my drift

- a bigger tv/monitor

- the ability to freeze time

- you always bring exactly how much money you'll need to the store

- youre a perfect cook/baker

- you have no allergies

- however you act in the past when time traveling does not effect your future

- you don't need glasses

- you fall asleep easily

- you always wake up on time

- you don't need extra hair products for the perfect hair you want (more defined curls, less frizz, etc)

- you always smell good

- any breakup ends as a mutual agreement and never is messy/leaves anyone on bad terms

- no one hits on your partner

- this one is nsfw but you're amazing at anything sexual/whoever you're sleeping with knows exactly how to please you

- you're a part of a royal family

- you're in some cliche chosen one story (just without the trauma that usually comes with it obv)

- you're immortal

- your pet never gets sick

- you understand and speak any (or all) language(s) as if they're your native language

Remember to not think logically about any of this! It'll all work out in the end

Oh these are absolutely wonderful, thank you!

[elijahlittle]

I have been scouring this fucking app for Julian fics, never really occurred to I can just request some lol.

So yeah, if you're up for it I've got a little plot/trope set up that'd id love to see. Outsider(fem)reader/julian.

Something along the lines of a reader moving into the park from the southern us, new to Canada and parks in general. As an outsider, Julian expected you to be trouble or judgemental, so he acts like a dick to you at first. Later on, he starts to see instead how kind you are to everyone, understanding and totally up for doing ppl favors even when there's nothing for you in the end. This makes him feel real guilty for bein an ass to you, and also makes him start to feel other things towards u.. Take the fic in whatever direction you'd I wanna see u work ur magic

( + no pressure 2 write it ofc!!)

pairing: julian/fem!reader fandom: trailer park boys tags: smut (cis man/cis woman), fluff, a bit of angst, idk this is one of my more normal ones, heavy plot some porn (i kind of felt more plot focused with this one), julian is kind of hung (he gives me big dick energy)  author's note: i'm much more of a ricky kinda guy myself but when i got this request, i got really fucking excited. i loved the idea. i will say, this fic isn't structured traditionally. it's very dialogue heavy and kind of leaves some things up to the imagination. i wanted to establish relationships between the reader and other people in the park as well as share some of julian's private conversations about her. i'm really proud of the way this has turned out, though i'm sorry if it's not the interpretation you might have been hoping for (i'm a little insecure about the way i interpret storylines). i hope you like it, though. i worked hard on it and i'm pretty sure it's the longest julian/reader fic currently on the internet so i'm going to take that fucking win rn. also, i actually live in the southern united states. (fun fact: i'm looking to move because i'm a trans man and life here is kind of ass if you're trans), so i gave the reader a backstory that's kind of unique to what a woman in 1999-2000 would have gone through. i'm not satisfied with the ending though, i'm sorry if this fic is a little lackluster, but we can only go up from here i guess. text blocking this shit was a fucking BITCH. word count: 6,442

everything i've ever let go of has claw marks on it.

The cultural climate of Sunnyvale Trailer Park wasn't exactly the most inviting. There were people who lived in the park and then there was everyone else. For the most part, newcomers never lasted more than a few weeks. The bottle kids drove away the weakest among them, but if those kids weren't effective usually Ricky's antics drove away the remaining lot. Sure, there were a few people here and there who moved in quietly, but those were usually the kind of people that minded their own business because lot rent was low enough for them to just ignore Lahey.

But in general, new people were not welcome. Especially know-it-all hipsters trying to live the simple life by casting away their possessions in an expensive storage unit and downsizing to a more humble trailer. Those were the kinds of guys that gave up quickly. Plus, new people threatened the balance of park politics. For the most part, Julian was well-liked and well-respected among the others due to his caring nature and dedication to his loved ones. He protected his own. And if there was one thing Julian didn't like, it was newcomers coming into the park without already knowing someone in it.

"Barb, I really think you should reconsider letting this girl in. I mean, you don't even know who she is." 

"Julian, this is a business, not a family estate. Her credit was just below decent, she has an okay-paying job, and paid three months of rent in advance. From a business perspective, she seems like she'll be a reliable tenant. It's a good thing you've grown close with your community, but you have to remember at the end of the day, this trailer park is here to make money. Whatever fit of paranoia you're suffering through, deal with it on your own time. Next time you come here with a complaint, make sure it's a business one." 

And just like that, Barb had shooed Julian off. What more could he say to that? Well, he had a lot more to say to that but she didn't want to listen. Every time he opened his mouth to speak, she only guided him further to the door. If Julian thought he was the one who ran this trailer park, he had another thing coming for him that's what. This dump needed more reliable tenants - normal folks who didn't like to get into trouble. Barb was trying to turn the park's image around.

"Julian, I just don't understand why you're so against this lady stayin' here. You know I'm no fan of newcomers myself, but she's been mindin' her own. She actually keeps her yard clean, which is pretty fuckin' nice if you ask me. It's nice to pass a yard that doesn't have a million fuckin' pieces of trash thrown all over the front. She even has one of those pink fuckin' yard flamingos in her yard. It's so bright and colorful. There ain't nothin' wrong with a little bit of color, Julian. Ain't nothin' wrong with a little bit of change." 

"Are you even listening to yourself talk Bubbles? Can you hear what you're saying? You're saying change for this park is good. Who knows what she believes in. She might hate dope growers, she may be workin' with Lahey, she could get nosy and bust us for dope and you know Ricky and I are growin' a lot of dope -" 

"- I know, I've seen that big fuckin' setup you got in that fuckin' trailer in that shitty little lot -" 

"- so then Bubbles you should know that new people aren't good. We can't trust new people, especially not now. Especially not when we're so close to selling them to those prison guards and retiring. A stranger could compromise the whole thing. Remember those bible scammers that came through here? I've learned my lesson since then and I'm not tryna repeat old mistakes." 

"Jesus Murphy Julian, you need to calm down. Those fuckin' assholes were obviously scammers, it's not like this lady is goin' door to door scammin' people." 

"Sure maybe she's not taking advanced orders on bibles Bubbles, but she is goin' in and out of everyone's house doin' favors for them. Why does she need to see the inside of everyone's house? Do you think she's lookin' for something?" 

"Have you ever stopped to think that maybe she's just a nice person doin' a nice thing? Nice people exist. You've been dealin' with dope and crime and jail so much that it's like you forgot how to trust someone. All you think about is dope and how you're going to protect it from everyone else." 

"You're only defendin' her because she brings you boxes of canned cat foods for your cats. She's buyin' you off and you don't even know it." 

"So what if she's helpin' me take care of my kitties? My kitties are the most important things to me and unlike you, she fuckin' knows that. If someone's offering to help take care of my precious little kitties, who the fuck am I to say no?" 

"Bubbles, look -" 

"No, no, nevermind." Bubbles tucks a gray cat further into his arms, his posture becoming more rigid. It's clear that he's done with the conversation, no longer interested in trying to hammer commonsense into Julian's brain. He couldn't see past his own paranoia and it was infuriating. In Julian's mind, everyone in the world was out to get him - even the nice lady across the street who helped his friend support his kitties. "You just don't get it, Julian. I'm goin' back home, come talk to me when you get it." 

Julian was still convinced he was right about this girl. If the bottle kids didn't run you out, he'd just take matters into his own hands. He didn't care whether or not Bubbles helped. Julian was a man of many connections, and even if he couldn't find someone else to get the job done he had no qualms with taking care of the situation himself.

"I mean, if you think that lady's dangerous then you know I'm gonna follow you Julian 'cause you got the brains and stuff behind the projector, but I just gotta let you know I'm still workin' on my grade ten so whatever idea you have you got to make sure it's not illegal 'cause I can't go back to jail, not right before Trinity's birthday. That means we can't do any property damage or breaking and entering or any shit like that." 

"I promise you Ricky we're not gonna go back to jail, we're just gonna annoy the shit out of her until she leaves. I was thinkin' maybe you and Cory and Trevor could host like a really loud party across the street tomorrow night, you know - something to keep her awake. If we get a noise complaint, we'll just shut it down, but then once the cops leave we'll start it back up again. We'll do this for a few nights until she finally decides to move out." 

"That's a pretty fucking good idea, that's smart. Plus, since it's a party we can get drunk and high."

It's 2 a.m. and that fucking party is still going. There were several times you considered calling in a noise complaint but you decided that it was a better idea to just wait it out. It had to end at some point and overall, it was never a good idea to get involved with parties like that because sometimes they got out of a hand, and you were too smart to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Though when you stepped outside to 'check your mailbox' - spy on the party still going on into the early hours of the morning - you find yourself tripping over something. You stumble onto your hands and knees and it's only when you pull yourself up do you really get a good look at the man passed out by your mailbox. It's Ricky, and he's mumbling things almost incoherently. He mutters something about dope, bitches, Trinity, more bitches, Lucy, and good booze. It's a pathetic way to be, but you can't help but feel bad for you.

You use the toe of your shoe to rock his face awake. Ricky sputters before waking up in a drunk panic. He's angry and yelling incoherently, but your promise of a hot shower and a hot sandwich satiates his anger. He struggles his way through a shower, though almost slips a few times. He eats hand to mouth, chewing loudly, and drunk conversation ensues. He shares a lot with you - stuff he probably wouldn't have shared sober. He eventually passes out, not remembering much in the morning. That morning you share breakfast and a little bit about each other. He tried to hate you, he really did, but you were charismatic in a friendly way. There weren't any ulterior motives, you just enjoyed conversation.

"I don't know Julian, she seems fine to me. I mean, she's not all that bad. Her yard is pretty clean and you know, she has that pink little flamingo in her yard and honestly it's pretty fuckin' cute. I mean yeah she's kinda annoying and I hate that fuckin' southern fuckin' cowboy accent she fucking has but whatever. I think you're gettin' worked up over nothin'. You've been so busy tryna push out this lady who hasn't done nothin' wrong to you while I'm over here slavin' away watchin' after these fuckin' dope plants and tryin' to study for my grade ten all while play peepin' tom spy guy on some poor fuckin' lady." 

"You're just saying that 'cause she let you spend the night and made you breakfast."

"You know what I sure as fuck I am! She made me breakfast and kept me from sleepin' on the fuckin' ground drunk as piss and let me use her shower and shit and I didn't even have to put out! It's not like I trust her or anything like that - I didn't talk about dope or nothin' like that at all." That was the truth. "It's just at this point anything is better than fucking Cory and Trevor. I'm not sayin' you gotta like her or trust her, but she's not all that bad Julian. Maybe if you actually got to fuckin' know her like I have you'd see that you're just being a paranoid dickbag." 

"You know what Ricky, you don't anything about her. You're just seeing what she wants you to see. But I'm smart, so I see right through it -" 

"Come on Julian don't be like that -" 

"- and since nobody is going to take care of this fucking situation then I guess I'll have to." 

Julian felt like everyone around him was failing him. Nobody else seemed to feel the same way he did about your existence in the trailer park. As each day passed, Julian grew more overtly snide. When approaching Ricky and Bubbles, Julian never took the time to acknowledge you. It was obvious that he was just being an ass, so you opted to ignore it, preferring not to fight. Silence was Julian's strongest weapon. But as the days ticked by, the tension between you and Julian only seemed to mount itself higher.

It's not like you inherently disliked Julian. In fact, you liked to believe that there was good in everyone and you prided yourself in your ability to be able to pull even the toughest people out of their shell. However, Julian was no easy project. Every time you tried to approach him, he simply brushed you off. You weren't even sure that the two of you had even exchanged any greetings. He hadn't even said hello. So when trying to talk to him didn't work, you simply tried to stay out of his way. This was frustrating for Julian because what he wanted you to do was to blow up and make it a big ordeal. But you didn't. You simply kept to yourself and resumed helping others around the park without complaints. 

There were times where Julian thought about approaching you in the way Julian thinks about approaching any pretty thing in a summer dress that talks to him. But he remains strong in the face of adversity. Gone were the days of chasing anything in a dress. He had a dope business to worry about.

But sometimes the thought would creep up onto Julian ever so slowly. Sometimes, he'd get this kind of fantasy in his head - especially on the Sunday afternoons you'd spend gently pushing yourself back and forth in your rocking chair, enjoying the summer sunlight. He could think of a million ways you two could enjoy the afternoon together, but he often pushed the thought out of his head. He had a park to protect. Friends to protect.

"You know, you have some real nerve comin' up here in this trailer park and putting on a show like you're doing." 

You look up from the rocking chair you were gently pushing yourself back and forth in and offer Julian a small smile.

"So you're Julian?"

Julian can't help but be a bit enamored with your slight southern drawl. It sounds like you're somewhere from the deep southern United States - one of those more rural provinces like Texas or Alabama. He can't quite pinpoint the accent, but he secretly finds it endearing.

"And how do you know that?" 

"I mean, with how much you do for the people here it's kind of hard not to know who you are. Plus, Ricky and Lucy both never seem to shut up about you. You know, if I didn't know any better I'd say they're both in love with you or something. Also, yesterday you came to pick up Ricky and he pointed right at you and said well, there's Julian, see ya later. I just put two and two together." 

"I'm not here to make small talk, (name)." 

"Then what are you here to do, Julian?" 

There's silence. What is he here to do. There wasn't anything that he could reasonably do and he wasn't the terrorizing type if he didn't have to be. Fuck, he had even promised that his greasy trouble-causing days were over. But here he was, standing at the edge of the patio stairs, contemplating whether or not he should threaten a woman.

"I'm just here to ask you about your intentions with Ricky, that's all." 

You can't help but laugh out loud at the comment. "Oh, please. There's nothing going on between us." 

Julian knows that because if there was something going on between you and Ricky, Ricky wouldn't shut up about it and the whole park would know. But he's trying to be covert about his intent to interrogate you.

"Yeah, well . . . there better not be . . . Ricky's a good guy and I'd really hate to see him get hurt . . ." 

"Why are you really here, Julian?" 

Julian stands in silence, thoughtfully cradling his glass in his hand as he tries to come up with a clever lie - but it's hard to think when he catches a glimpse of your thighs pressed together underneath your thin summer dress. He squints and then looks away briefly.

"I just wanted to stop by and tell you more about the culture of Sunnyvale. You know, we're really tight-knit. Like family."

"I know." 

"And you know, family protects family." 

"I know." 

"And you know, I'd do anything for my family." 

"I know." 

"Anything." 

"What are you getting at?" 

"I'm not getting at anything, (name). I'm just givin' you a little more info about our park, just trying to get acquainted with you." 

"Oh, you're trying to get acquainted with me? This is the first time I've spoken to you in the month I've been living here." 

"Well, you know, I was busy with the business I'm running -" 

"- that lawn mowing business you and Ricky got?" 

Is that what Ricky is calling it? "Yeah, we've had a lot of customers so I've been having to do a lot of bookwork to keep up with the business you know. But it's been busy, so I haven't had time to talk, but now I do and I want to get to know you." 

"You want to get to know me?" 

"That's what I just said isn't it?" 

"Well I'll tell you what Julian," You push the chair backwards in thought, looking up at the bright summer sky. The sun shines in your face, warming your skin. It's a nice feeling. "If you really want to get to know me, you'll come over for dinner tonight." 

Julian wasn't going to admit it but he was excited at the prospect of dinner. The last time he shared time - much less a meal - with a woman, she ended up stealing his dope plants and lying to him about being in love. In all fairness, most people would have been wary of someone saying I love you within the first week of getting to know them, but Julian (for the most part) was a hopeless romantic. He liked the idea of a life with someone else. 

Julian told himself that this was strictly business - that he was here to set the record straight. This wasn't get-to-know-you dinner, this wasn't a date. He was just here to let you know that he wasn't going to tolerate funny business. He just happened to be wearing his nicest clean black shirt and he just happened to be wearing one of his nicer pair of jeans - the ones that didn't have the holes in them. Julian knocks on your door. The two minutes he waits for you to answer feels like an eternity but when you open the door, he's glad he's waited. 

"You got a hot date you're going to after this?" 

"What, this?" You look down at the pink summer dress you're wearing, "This is casual." You had always been the more feminine type, enjoying softer clothes and pretty dresses. Plus, unlike jeans dresses were more comfortable. You usher him inside and he obliges, being careful to not spill his drink when he steps in. 

"Dinner is served." Dinner being a massive fucking bowl of macaroni and cheese with cheap ass hot dogs. "Sorry it's not exactly the best, but -"

"It's fine, don't worry about it." Julian sets his glass down. He's actually ecstatic. Macaroni and cheese and fucking hotdogs? "You know, I don't know where you're from but around here this is a five-star meal." 

You give a dry laugh. as Julian picks up his fork to eat. "You'll have to forgive me, I'm kind of new to the whole trailer park life and the whole being poor thing." 

"Oh yeah? Where are you from?" 

"Southern United States." 

"What state?" 

"Texas." 

"That's a long way from here, basically on the other side of the continent. Why'd you come up this way?" Julian tells himself that he's not trying to get to know you because he's interested in you - he's trying to get to know you to get dirt on you, to know what he's up against. 

"I needed an abortion." You answer dryly, "And even though it's been legal for some years now, no physician was wiling to perform one on me." 

"Why come to Nova Scotia? Why not just go to another state?" 

"Well, I figured things were just better here than they were there. Don't get me wrong, it's not perfect by any means but it's better than where I was from. At least here I know if I need the service again, it's a little more reliably accessible. Plus, it's not like I had anywhere or anyone I could turn to. So I just kind of . . . stayed." 

"Heavy stuff." Julian sets down his fork, "Didn't have any family to turn to?" 

"No, and even if I did they're not the kind of people I'd want to be around." 

Julian could relate to that.

"So you just came to Canada for an abortion and then decided to stay? You know, when Americans come to Canada they want to go to Quebec. Nova Scotia isn't exactly on the top of the list, let alone Dartmouth. Let alone fucking Sunnyvale Trailer Park. Nobody just moves in here. Come on, (name) . . . what's the real reason why you're staying here?" 

Your mouth runs dry as you consider answering him honestly. "Well, uh . . . you know . . ." You twiddle your thumbs a bit, "I came to Canada with my passport and got my abortion and then . . . I just uh . . ." There's a long pause as your appetite disappears completely. "I didn't have anywhere to go to so I just . . . never left . . . this place was the only place that'd rent to an illegal resident . . ." 

"Holy fuck you don't have your papers?" Julian wasn't sure what kind of story he was expecting but it wasn't that. Now he feels like an asshole. "How did you get a job? How did you even afford this place?" 

"Well, I had some savings so that was a good cushion, but when that ran out I was able to find a job working as a waitress at that little restaurant just out of town. I'm not technically on the payroll, they just don't make me report my tips, and any extra money is kind of . . . earned under the table." You respond sheepishly.

God, Julian feels like such a fucking jackass for being a raging asshole to you. 

"That's . . . hard." Julian doesn't really know what else to say.

"Yeah." 

"Well, I've shared my deepest darkest secret with you. Do you want to share anything with me?" 

You and Julian talk well into the early hours of the morning, swapping life stories, funny anecdotes, and talking about all of the small things in between. Honestly, he feels at ease with you in a way he hasn't felt at ease before. The conversation flows naturally and even the silence you occasionally fall into feels comfortable. It's nearly two in the morning when you both look at the small clock hanging on your wall and realize the time.

". . . well, it's a little late . . ." You stretch in your chair, still sitting across the table from Julian. You don't really want him to go, but you've both run out of things to talk about and you still have some errands you have to run before work tomorrow. "You know, I have some things I gotta do tomorrow . . . but if you're feeling nice, maybe you can pay me back for dinner by making some for me. I'm usually too tired to cook when I get home . . . you know, only if you want to." 

It's hard for Julian to say no to that face.

"What time do you get off work?"

. . .

Julian continues to insist that he doesn't feel some kind of way, that he's just taking the opportunity to really get to know you - you know, in case you ever pose a threat - but the nightly dinner-dates seem to differ. 

"Why is it so hard to admit that you have a hard-on for (name)? It's so fucking obvious." 

"It's not like that Ricky. You know, I have somewhere to be so why don't you just fuck off and give me some fucking space?" 

"Oh yeah I know exactly where you want to be, all up in -" 

The truth of the matter was that even though Julian fantasized about it at night, truly nothing had happened. You were sweet, kind, intelligent, patient, compassionate - a truly wonderful person. And that was the problem. Normally, Julian found himself happy to jump into a relationship, but he found himself afraid of making a fool of himself. Guys like him didn't get with girls like you. Simple as that. Besides, love just wasn't in the cards for Julian. It just never worked out like that.

Tonight was yet another night of disappointment. You had lingered on Julian's doorstep after dinner, hoping that maybe he'd make a move and at least give you a kiss goodnight - but the two of you simply stood there awkwardly until he nodded, saying he was probably going to go off to bed now. It was frustrating because you thought you were sending all of the right signals. Light touches, flirtatious giggles, risque comments - the works. But yet again, you find yourself leaving empty-handed. It wasn't that you weren't satisfied with the friendship, you really liked the dynamic the two of you had. You liked that Julian showed you ways to save money, ways to spruce up the trailer home so it felt more roomy, showed you around town a bit - but it left you feeling a bit stupid because you could have sworn the two of you had something more. You could just feel it. But he never addressed it and it drove you crazy. 

You knock on the door nervously, your hands shaking.

Julian answers the door again. "What's going on?" 

"I don't want to go home just yet. This is about the time J-Roc films his adult films. Can I just sit here for thirty more minutes? He usually finishes up around one in the morning or so." 

"Uh, yeah, sure, come on in. You can hang out here. I have to shower because, you know, I got somewhere to be in the morning -" Tomorrow was the day he was supposed to drop off the product with the prison guards, "- normally I'd wait up but I got some important stuff I gotta take care of tomorrow. I'm about to get ready for bed, so you can just leave whenever you're ready."

"Alright." 

You find yourself sitting awkwardly on the couch as Julian disappears into the bathroom. The trailer shakes a bit when he turns on the water and you can hear the pipes rush before the water falls like rain into the tub. You sit in silence and contemplate. You couldn't keep going back and forth like this, it'd get nowhere. He had hinted a few times at maybe having feelings. Sometimes his hand would linger on the small of your back too long when he was moving past you, or he'd stand too close to you - so close your shoulders would touch - whenever he got the chance. But nothing would ever come of it, and you were tired of it. You think about maybe joining him in the shower but that's too ballsy of a move, so you simply sit there and listen to the shower run until it's turned off. There's more shuffling and you can hear him go into his room. The hallway light turns off and the door clicks close. You should probably get going by now, but you can't bring yourself to just leave.

. . .

You feel like a psychopath drifting down the hallway. You only came down here to use the bathroom, but now you were standing at his bedroom door - contemplating whether or not you should knock on the door.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

"Ricky, is that you? I told you to stop picking my fucking lock -" 

"No," You answer meekly, "It's me. I uh, wanted to take that book back I lent you before I went home. I didn't see it in your living room so I figured you might be keeping it in here." 

Julian stares up at the ceiling in thought. Julian is pretty book-smart and it doesn't take a genius to know the game you're running. He's been down this road a thousand times. He wants to say yes, but there's still the lingering fear of ruining the good friendship that's already there.

Julian turns his head to look at his nightstand, the small paperback book sat there. Shit, maybe you weren't playing any games.

"Yeah, give me a moment, I'll come bring it to you." 

"You don't have to go through that trouble, I'll just come get it real quick . . . if that's alright with you." 

". . . that's alright with me." 

You gently push the door open, slipping through before gently closing the door behind you. You can only see the outline of Julian's body in the dark, a few shadows illuminated by the moonlight that drifts in through the blinds. 

"It's right over here." You see the shadow of Julian's hand reach over and grab the thick book. Infinite Jest.

"I'll come get it." You pull yourself up onto the bed, you're knees on either side of his feet. Gently, you shimmy your way up, crawling over him on your hands and knees. Julian shifts a bit. Both of your breaths are heavy and as you sit yourself comfortably on his waist, you watch his chest rise and fall with heavy breaths. Gently, you pluck the book from his hand. "Thank you." 

"You're welcome." Julian's voice is barely over a whisper.

You thumb through the thick book, landing on a page barely illuminated by the moonlight, reading the page you've thumbed to. "Everything I've ever let go of has claw marks on it." Truer words have never been spoken. Like everything in life, Julian has sunk his fingernails so deep into it he's drawn blood. He likes to pretend he can let things go, but he can't. 

Julian's hands gently grip at your hips, squeezing them softly - almost like he's afraid that if he squeezes too tight he'll hurt you. His fingers grip at your waist, gently pushing your hips backwards, guiding them in a gentle rocking motion against him. Your hips follow the movement of his hands, rocking against him with a pleased hum.

"Is that right?" Julian asks in a whisper.

"That's right." You respond gently.

"Me included?" He can't hope that you want him so bad that you'd sink your nails so deep into him that he'd never be able to leave you, even if he wanted to. And even if you wanted to leave him, he'd probably stay around and beg for you to take him back anyway.

"If you'll let me." 

If he wasn't rock hard before he's rock fucking hard now. "I want you." Julian's voice is hoarse, completely contradicting his typically firm and masculine present. He melts under you. Whether he wanted to believe it or not, Julian was a romantic and the touch of a woman he really valued meant a lot to him. His breath is labored as he guides your hips against him, "Please, I want you." 

If this were someone else in the park, it'd be a different story. Sleeping around with people in the park for Julian wasn't about emotions, it was about releasing a physical need, and when you can't keep a boyfriend sometimes you have to turn to your neighbors for some help. Everyone slept with everyone. But you're not them, this isn't just casual for Julian - he doesn't want to fuck it up. He shudders when your fingertips drag across his chest, tracing patterns and circles into his shirt as you rock against him, grinding your hips downwards to create more friction. You're a tease, you take your time, and he hates it but he loves it. Two large hands reach up to cup your breasts over your shirt gently, His hands trail downwards, over your abdomen, grabbing gently at your stomach for a short moment before finding themselves at the hem of your shirt. 

"What are you waiting for?" You ask him between small breaths, still making rhytmic riding motions. It's a softly-asked question but also a plea for action. "Please, Julian. I've wanted this since the moment I saw you." 

"God, fuck you're so fucking hot." It's like a flip switched in his head and he can't hold himself back anymore. Strong hands placed firmly on your hips flip you onto your back. Now he's on top of you, every part of him everywhere. His lips touch yours in a kiss, teeth pull at the skin of your neck, and tongue sooths the freshly bruised areas by rubbing itself on it in small circles. Like always, he can't help himself, and unlike recently, he stops wasting time.

Your shirt is the first thing to come off - Julian helps shimmy it off of you, throwing it to the side. The next thing to come off is your pajama pants, which he also tosses to the side after helping shimmy it off of you. He has half a mind to compliment the pretty color of your underwear and tell you it looks good on you, but he doesn't pay it any mind since it's about to come off anyways. His hands lift you up by the small of your back just long enough for him to unclasp your bra, letting you fall back down onto the bed. His hands hook underneath your knees, lifting them up and pushing your legs up so he can help slide your underwear easily off of your body. You're left naked under him while he remains fully clothed, lowering himself onto you before you can complain that he hasn't undressed yet.

His thumbs roll against your nipples, gently pinching and pulling at them before taking them into his mouth. Julian has never been the most gentle lover, especially when he gets excited, always eager to take matters into his own hands - but that's part of his appeal.

Kisses trail down your stomach, followed by him dragging his tongue along the skin, pushing your legs apart. He takes his time adorning your inner thighs with kisses, sucking on the skin and taking it between his teeth. He likes the way he makes you whimper and moan, it's intoxicating. But eventually the teasing becomes too much even for him, he's growing impatient, so he lends his tongue to you, circling it around your clit, strong nose pressed into sensitive skin.

Your body writhes as you feel a familiar pressure build in your abdomen, thighs tightening around his head so tight he thought he might suffocate. What a way to go that would be. Your fingers curl into his short hair, gripping and pulling at his hair while your toes curl. You whimper but that only encourages him to slowly push his thick index finger into you, followed by a second after you properly adjusted. His mouth and fingers work in tandem, his fingers curling and pressing inside of you in a come hither motion while his tongue continues to stroke your clit.

"Fuck, Julian, god, fuck -" But before you can climax, he's gone - pulling away. If Julian enjoys anything, it's edging. There's just something about bringing a woman to climax and leaving them nearly in tears that turns him on. 

"You look disappointed." Julian catches a glimpse of your lopsided frown illuminated in the moonlight, "Don't worry, I'll take care of it." His shirt is pulled over his head, exposing his bare chest. When you touch the muscle, it's firm from years of consistent working-out. You trace a tattoos that look like they were done with a sewing needle and ink - probably stick and poke tattoos - but Julian frowns. He doesn't like those tattoos, he's not proud of them and he's not proud of his time spent in jail. But you only offer him an encouraging smile and place your palm over the tattoo before dragging your hand down to his belt, pulling at the buckle. Julian offers you a half-hearted smile. "Can't wait?"

Julian pushes your hand out of the way gently, taking his time to unfasten his belt and slowly pulling it through the loops. The belt is tossed to the side, along with his pants and underwear, leaving you both equals. Two hands hook themselves underneath your knees, placing your ankles on his shoulders while he uses his right hand to stroke his cock a bit, helping to harden himself up more. Sometimes the nerves just get to you.

"Holy fuck Julian you're big, you gotta be careful with that thing you're carrying a whole fucking concealed weapon -" 

Julian chuckles a bit at the comment but presses a gentle kiss to your ankles. "I'll be careful with you if that's what you're trying to say." 

The tip is pushed in slowly with great discomfort, pushing himself in. There's a stiff moment of silence as you let out a labored breath. 

"You good?" he asks.

You nod, dragging your teeth over your bottom lip. Julian takes his thumb against your bottom lip, peeling it out from underneath your teeth. His thumb drags your bottom lip down, exposing the inside of it before pushing his thumb into your mouth. Your lips wrap around his thumb, letting your tongue slide against the skin, sucking on the appendage as he pulls out just a bit, repositioning himself before he thrusts back in. Your body pushes upwards with the motion, head pressing against the headboard slightly. His thumb is still pressed in your mouth while his free hand keeps hooked underneath your knee, pushing it backwards so he can angle himself better - each thrust pushing itself deeper inside of you. Sweat coats his chest and runs down the side of his face, abdomen flexing the closer he gets to coming, but he restrains himself - wanting to ride it out for as long as he could. 

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." 

"Oh, God, Julian -" 

"Fuck, (name)." 

"Julian -" 

"(Name), (Name), (Name)." 

"I heard you did a real good job of running that girl out of the trailer park last night, Julian." 

"Hey, Barbara, why don't you fuck off?" 

#julian tpb #tpb julian #tpb ricky #trailer park boys #tpb #ricky lafeur #julian x reader #julian x reader tpb #tpb bubbles #tpb ricky and julian #ricky tpb #julian x you tpb #trailer park boys reader insert #tpb reader insert

[agnerd-bot]

So... Goku Vs Superman(2023) was absolutely peak

A lot of people say that Bill Vs Discord was a love letter to the community, and I definitely agree with that. It had so many in-jokes and references to Vs creators and reactors and delivered on one of the most wanted episodes in Death Battle history.

But if Bill Vs Discord is a love letter to the vs community, I'd say Goku Vs Superman III was a love letter to the very idea of vs debates itself, as well as a reminder of why so many folks get invested in these silly little fights to begin with.

If you're not one like me and you don't spend time in endless debates regarding who would win in a fight, a little backstory:

(Also, spoilers. Obviously.)

In 2013, Death Battle released Goku Vs Superman as its finale to its first ever season, an episode over half an hour long tackling one of the biggest rivalries in pop culture to ever exist. And it broke the internet.

While I'll fully admit that this episode has aged significantly since its release, it's also undeniably Death Battle's most iconic episode, and for a damn good reason. It brought in MasakoX from DBZA and ItsJustSomeRandomGuy from I'm a Marvel/I'm a DC, two of the most iconic internet voices of Goku and Superman, was the first Death Battle to have its own original score, and is over ten minutes of non-stop action between two of pop culture's biggest juggernauts. It was a spectacle unlike any other.

Unfortunately with nerd debates like these, you're gonna also get some toxicity, and the results of this episode were... controversial to say the least. While folks loved the fight, the salt and anger it stirred up rubbed many the wrong way.

Then, two years later, after the release of Battle of Gods and several other new movies, Goku Vs Superman II was released.

Originally meant to be a highlight reel of cut content that didn't make it into the original, it was instead released as a full episode and advertised as a rematch. Many people were dissatisfied with this, including Ben Singer, one of the minds behind the series, who straight up admitted its his least favorite Death Battle because of how he felt it as an unintentional kick in the nuts for Dragon Ball fans. And he wasn't the only one, as many folks have deemed the episode one of their worst. While I personally don't hate the episode, it does do a disservice to both Goku and Superman as characters I feel, and like many, I dreaded the idea of an inevitable rematch happening that'd bring back the debate that many felt needed to just die at this point.

So when the news of Goku Vs Superman III came out... a lot of people felt nothing but immense dread. Many were sick and tired of this matchup and thought that this would be another episode that would just end up making people more angry.

And then the episode came out:

God, am I glad we got this episode. While my #1 favorite still goes to Cole Vs Alex at this point, I can't deny how good it felt to watch this episode go down.

Close friends of mine know that I am a massive Superman fan. He's my favorite character of all time, and I'll fully admit that the original Goku Vs Superman was a big reason for that. It really introduced me to Superman as a character beyond the baser knowledge that everyone knew. Similarly? This was the episode that got me interested in Dragon Ball. I'm still very new to the franchise(only got started recently with Xenoverse and FighterZ), but this rematch got me to understand why Goku's such an icon in his own right. I never got into Dragon Ball unlike a lot of folks, and I'll fully admit I didn't really 'get it'. I watched stuff like DBZA, but that's still a parody that doesn't quite get to the heart of who Goku truly is as a character, as much love as they put into it.

This episode does such a good job approaching both Goku and Superman not just as icons of strength or power, but as genuine inspirations to look forward to. Goku symbolizing someone who is always willing to push himself further when all hope seems lost. Determination incarnate always willing to bring out the best in himself and others. Superman symbolizing a simple wish for goodness and humanity. A hero beyond the stars who will help fight back the darkness in any way he can. They're the greatest embodiments of goodness and hope in their respective universe, and inspire countless people inside and out of it.

This further ties into the actual fight itself. In the original Goku Vs Superman and its sequel, Goku and Superman were very aggressive to one another, their attacks vitriolic and seeing the other as an enemy, kind of reflecting the toxicity that this debate symbolized for so many people. But now? They're fighting because they're enjoying themselves, seeing the other as an equal they can find themselves at ease around. Goku is constantly encouraging Clark to cut loose and stop holding himself back, and Superman is realizing that he doesn't have to fear his own strength here. This fight is as much a battle to the death as it is therapy. There's two moments in particular that really draw my eye and love for this fight.

"World made of cardboard..."

Superman is someone who has often been characterized by fearing his own strength in several stories, always worrying if he'll break someone or something, afraid to truly put himself at his limits.

But after this poignant moment... he smiles. Because now, he has someone he can go all out against and encourages him to go even further beyond. And that he does, truly releasing his unrestrained power at his rival's request.

"Finally."

This is such a good moment both in and out of context. In context, Goku's looking on in excitement and pride as he finally, finally gets to see his rival go all out against him, not holding back to let him see him at his best.

Out of context? In both the previous versions of Goku Vs Superman, Superman was treated as an impossibility for Goku to overcome. The idea that Goku could even come close to his rival was seen as something that could never happen? But now? After how hard he's worked? After how far he's come? He's reached the point where he can stand tall alongside him, even if he can't win.

In the end, these two titans meet for their final clash in a beautiful call back to the original Goku Vs Superman, creating a punch parry strong enough to rewrite all of reality itself.

And in the end, when the dust settles?

Goku has lost again, for the third time now. But instead of last time where he simply accepts that he'll never beat Superman, he just goes, "Ah, darnit," and laughs the whole thing off, saying he'll work even harder to win next time. Because even in the face of the impossible, Goku will always try to make it possible.

And how does Superman respond?

He smiles, admitting "That was actually pretty fun!" He enjoyed himself, a far cry from his somber and serious nature in the previous fights. He got to let go and really unleash his limits thanks to Goku, and has come around to the Saiyan's lighthearted sparring(well, lighthearted for them at least).

This episode has a wholesomeness that not many other Death Battles have, and definitely not as well. So many people have come out expressing how much they've loved this episode and how happy it made them, and I think the episode itself does a fantastic job at encapsulating why.

"There's more than one way to appreciate something. We're having a great time talking about awesome characters, and slamming action figures together. And that's okay!"

The debates on who's stronger or who would win are never going to die. There's always going to be something new to bring to the table, new arguments to be had, new thoughts to debate. And... there's nothing wrong with that. At the end of the day, we engage with these nerdy debates because we love these characters and we love them interacting. Who wins or loses doesn't matter, what matters is that we simply have fun with it. I think that's something folks have forgotten at some points, myself included.

Hell, Death Battle is the reason why I started writing in the first place. It's how I chose to put myself out there by writing combat fanfiction with my friends, and it's how I found my own footing as a writer. I would not be where I am today without this silly little internet series, and I'm so grateful that it's still going on to this day.

It's so amazing to see where Death Battle started and where it is now. Season 10 has given us so many fantastic episodes, to the point that every episode this season, at least one person I know has claimed an episode to be their favorite. It's been so fun with this season, and it's honestly given me a lot of inspiration to pick up writing again, both for Vs and in general.

If you somehow haven't seen this episode, please watch it. It's grand, it's heartwarming, it's overwhelming, it's so many things going on at once.

And at the end of the day, it's just... fun.

"Let's go again."

"You're on."

#death battle #son goku #superman #kakarot #kal-el #clark kent #dragon ball #dragon ball z #dragon ball super #dc #dc comics #long post #Youtube

[heeheesang]

𝔂𝓪𝓷𝓰 𝓳𝓾𝓷𝓰𝔀𝓸𝓷—𝓭𝓪𝓷𝓬𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝔂𝓸𝓾

𝔂𝓪𝓷𝓰 𝓳𝓾𝓷𝓰𝔀𝓸𝓷—𝓸𝓭𝓭 𝓸𝓷𝓮 𝓸𝓾𝓽

sypnosis : girl named kim yn, debuts under hybe with a ton of attention, making her stand out from the rest. she thought it was fine at first, until she was caught off guard and caught in a scandal with one of the groups in hybe labels.

warnings! cursing & innapropriate jokes (at certain chapters)

"this is such a complicated dance, won.." i mumbled under my breath as jungwon let out short laughs.

i stood up and tried to copy the dance while jungwon sat at the side and played his phone for a bit until i was ready. we started off slow with laughters at how awkward the dance was, then starting the actual dance.

jungwon's perfect at dancing, he really is. he knows how to keep himself stable and the backup dancer stable when holding their waist. i'm very shy when people do skinship like hugging me or holding hands, could you imagine how red i was when jungwon held my waist and we held hands?

"ynnie, you okay? you're as red as a tomato." jungwon laughed as i fanned myself and tied my hair up into a low ponytail, "just a little hot.."

"you wanna get something to drink from the cafeteria?" jungwon asked and i almost immediately nodded, taking my phone and my wallet.

we raced to the elevator and jungwon reached first because my shoes came off while running. i pouted a little bit and even gave him the silent treatment as a joke but he took it a little seriously and even wanted to re-race just so i could win.

"won, i'm just playing with you! i'm fine, you should've seen your reaction!" i laughed as we entered the escalator and he pouted.

i took my pointer fingers and placed them both at the tip of his mouth, lifting it up and suddenly made eye contact with him, taking off my fingers almost immediately and i felt awkward and embarrassed now.

"sorry.. i always did that to my friends and... i'm sorry." i stuttered while he laughed and patted my back, "yoi, no worries! it's kinda cute!"

once we made our way out of the elevator, he suddenly started a debate.

"cereal or milk first?" was the main debate topic.

"i'd say milk first because personally, i love crunchy cereal and like if i put cereal first then milk, the cereal's gonna get so.. soggy!" i started.

"but what for if you put milk first then cereal, i mean might as well just eat cereal on its own if you like it crunchy right?" he argued.

the debate went on forever until we arrived at the cafe. he ordered chai tea and i ordered white mocha. he was about to pay but i pushed his hand away and pressed on the counter while i tapped my card, it's all like deja vu.

"well played.. i'm paying next time!"

"i'll be sure to go to a wealthy restaurant next then!" i joked and he poked my sides causing me to almost fall but thankfully he caught me.

after we finished our drink, we went back up to the dance studio and neaten up the dance a little bit more before we practiced one last time.

"you're so good at this yn! becoming an idol really suits you," jungwon complimented as i blushed and packed my items.

"you're just saying that because you're a senior~"

"no like, seriously! you're doing an amazing job!"

"thanks won, but i feel like people on the internet think otherwise..." ny voice started becoming silent and jungwon immediately rushed to my side, holding me by my shoulders to look at him.

"ynnie, i know i've said this alot but ignore them! i know it's hard to ignore them but the more you let it get to you, the more it's gonna be hard for you, ynnie. we're in this together okay! your members, my members, just hybe! we're all here to support you, ynnie. we love you, we care for you, i care for you." jungwon said as my eyes got slightly watery which made him pull me into a hug while i cried onto his shoulders.

a/n : sunghoon and yn folded 🤣

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@clairecottenheart

#enhypen #enhypen fluff #enhypen texts #enhypen smau #enhypen scenarios #enhypen x reader #yang jungwon texts #yang jungwon smau #yang jungwon fluff #yang jungwon #jungwon fluff #jungwon #jungwon smau #jungwon texts

[thewanderingmask]

oh hey is it time to go watch old media until the writer's strike is over

welp here's my list, i highly recommend adding onto it or making your own

sit-coms

Better Off Ted (office comedy about a pretty decent guy who manages the R&D department of your standard big capitalist (evil) company. absurd, sincere, and blessedly not nihilistic.)

Golden Girls (four older women living together. openly touched upon topics like gay people are human beings actually and so are people without houses. and this was in the 80s.)

Murphy Brown (Reporter/news presenter workplace comedy. i like eldin)

WKRP (set in a radio station, this one is a pain to find unedited anywhere because of music licensing nonsense)

Designing Women (i haven't actually watched much of this yet but i heard it's pretty good so i'm listing it here in hopes i'll remember to check it out)

british panel / comedy shows (ok so they're like game shows, except the prizes range from useless to nonexistent, all the contestants are comedians, and nobody really cares that much who wins. ,fair warning though, these are british. so you're just gonna get a certain amount of jokes that are like "yup an old cishet white dude sure did write that")

Would I Lie to You (contestants make ridiculous claims and the opposing team has to guess if it's real or not)

8 out of 10 Cats does Countdown (not "8 out of 10 Cats". not "Countdown". specifically "8 out of 10 cats does countdown". yes this is important)

Taskmaster (five contestants perform a series of increasingly silly tasks to try to score points)

Big Fat Quiz of the Year / Decade (a series of long quiz specials where comedians often fail, intentionally or otherwise, to answer questions)

crime/detective/spy shows (cw copaganda. bc that's the entire genre)

Columbo (did you know it's ALL on the internet archive? for FREE?)

Simon and Simon (private investigators who are also brothers, a bit more on the fun side. pretty good for the 80s, but be warned you're still gonna get some dopey tropes like ableism in certain episodes.)

Rockford Files (ex-convict PI. doesn't like guns, friends with his dad. cynical but can't help helping people most of the time. we love to see it. like the two above, it's older but it holds up)

Brooklyn 99 (much like columbo, everybody already knows this one)

Burn Notice (recent ex-spy stuck in miami tries to get his job back. an unfortunate amount of ogle-y filler shots. I liked the first 4 seasons and low key recommend stopping after it, but everybody's mileage varies.)

and finally, because i know who i a:

cartoons

Motorcity (what if the only answer to an oppressive conformist society was UNDERGROUND TEENS WITH CARS and it looked AMAZING and it was KILLED AFTER 20 EPISODES BECAUSE THERE IS NO GOD)

Storm Hawks (what if the only answer to a returning evil empire was SKY TEENS WITH AIRPLANE MOTORCYCLES, side note this is like the only time i've ever seen stylized 3D animation in a way that just looks? good?? i would love to see more stuff try this kind of direction instead of aiming for anime or realism)

Generator Rex (a teen with TRANSFORMING MUTANT MACHINE POWERS fights alongside a kinda sus organization to try to save others who have transformed into dangerous mutants. i haven't finished this one and im not a fan of the monkey character but dam this show kinda slaps)

Teen Titans (TEEN SUPERHEROES. i have a soft spot for this show. it was my first superhero show as a kid and still mostly holds up as good fun)

Spectacular Spider-Man (spider-man has a lotta cartoons by now but this is up there near the top i feel)

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic (it's PRETTY it's CUTE it's FUNNY and only has a few episodes i would outright skip. i stopped enjoying it by the last couple seasons but i still think it's worth a watch if you haven't yet)

Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD IN THIS WORLD WATCH THIS SHOW DEAR GODS IT LOOKS INCREDIBLE IT'S SO MUCH FUN AND I LOVE MY IDIOT SONS SO MUCH AND THEN IT PUNCHES YOU RIGHT IN THE EMOTIONS WHEN YOU AREN'T EXPECTING IT-)

and Bluey. watch Bluey.

AIGHT THAT'S IT FOR NOW honestly i could add more to this but my memory ain't that good

✨enjoy✨

#words words words #long post #please add/make your own lists for real tho #i wanna watch stuff

[uncloseted]

Did u like the Barbie movie? I feel bad bc I really liked it, I think it just spoke to me personally at the stage in my life I'm in, but people say it's like surface level feminism so I'm like should I be willing to critique it more idk you know?

I haven't seen it yet but I'm dying to! I've been so excited for it but I've also been super sick for the last week so I haven't gotten out to the theater yet.

In general, though, my view on it is that a win is a win. Barbie made $377 million in its opening weekend, making it the biggest debut ever for a film directed by a woman. It's the biggest opening this year, surpassing The Super Mario Bros Movie and every Marvel film released this year. It's reportedly the biggest debut for a comedic film ever. And it's a movie made by women, for women, about women. That's an insanely huge win for women in the film industry and films centering women, which have historically been derided as unprofitable. It's cause for celebration.

Is Greta Gerwig giving Judith Butler or Gloria Steinem levels of feminist critique? Of course not. But like, respectfully to all of those people who are mad about it, fuck off. Nobody is ever mad at the Marvel movies for being about socio-political issues but not delving into them deeply enough, but for some reason the Barbie movie has to be a treatise on feminism? It's not meant to be a three and a half hour long exploration of female frustration that you can only watch in French. It's meant to be a fun, campy, blockbuster movie, and that's what it is.

Frankly, anything more than what it's giving would be alienating to a mass audience and would contribute to the idea that women's films are unprofitable and not worth funding. Already, it's feminist content is making a ton of men very angry, and as dumb as it is, the reality is that that kind of anger has a very real impact on box office sales and future decision making. There's a reason Captain Marvel is largely absent from the other Marvel films, and there's a reason that almost nobody has seen the entirety of Jeanne Dielman, 23 Commerce Quay, 1080 Brussels (including me, despite many attempts). When you're creating pop culture, you have to meet the culture where it's at, not where you wish it was. And I think Greta Gerwig seems to have done a really great job of threading that needle. People who were expecting more from the Barbie movie were being unrealistic about what it could or would be able to do.

And not to be on a whole thing, but this constant rejection of all media is one of the reasons people find feminists and leftists on the internet so insufferable. Nothing is ever good enough. Everything has to be critiqued to death and nothing can just be enjoyed for what it is (unless it's like, the worst media possible, in which case it's a perfect masterpiece of feminist critique). It makes for a group of people who are constantly miserable because nothing can ever live up to their standards of ideological purity, and it makes for a group of people that alienates the creators that are on their side. I know it's out of fashion to be an incrementalist these days, and sure, let's smash the patriarchy, but the more we support movies like the Barbie movie, the more other female directors will get the chance to tell the stories that they want to tell, and the more likely it is that we'll see a film on the big screen that does interact with feminism in a deep and nuanced way. Maybe Greta Gerwig will tell that story, even. But she's not going to get to (or want to) if everyone jumps all over her for not being feminist enough, you know? I think in this case, everyone just needs to enjoy the fun. I promise it's good for our souls and for the feminist movement as a whole.

Edit: also, apologies if this was way more intensity than you were expecting. I just have a lot of feelings 😭

[anonauthorsworkshop]

I finally found your pansophical pretender fic, and I noticed your name,, YOU'RE A FELLOW SIPHONOPHORE FAN TOO?????????? BRO, they are literally so underrated and I hate how some people are fear mongering them with the whole "oh they can sting and are super creepy" but they are literally just minding their business living in a colony looking pretty?? bro do not diss my underwater rococo beauties. SIPHONOPHORE FANS STAY WINNING good job on the fic btw, the story progresses so nicely, its not so cringingly ooc, like the characters you write ARE ALLOWED to be assholes bc let's be honest, THEY ARE. The foundation is super inhumane (they're on the villains wiki ffs and they look at the anomalies as something to contain and use even if they have their own feelings) and I LOVED how you wrote 079 and 035, but I'm gonna focus on 079, I adoooreeee the fact that you allowed him to not understand but still feel joy at the way the MC treats him, we are talking about an A.I that was abandoned by his own FATHER seen as a sort of frakenstein creature when he was only a BABY, like yeah, he has the modern library of alexandria (internet) at his disposal but he still hasnt learnt emotional and social cues with you know, being locked and tested and prodded with no warmth or kindness given to him so you making his dialogue cold, taciturn and apathetic. the same way how the researchers interview everyone else and how he reflects their behaviour is so fascinating to me I LOVE HOW YOU DID THAT srsly, mwuauh mwauh mwauh. I would love to sing your praises and how you write our favourite characters but I think it would clog up your blog. keep on writing darling, I'm eating up your work, hope mc is able to talk with 035 more nicely because with how he made sure to keep us well rested??? mm delicious, and we know he likes courtesy so hopefully with him proving himself trustworthy we'll open up to him more

SIPHONOPHORES ARE SO FUCKING COOL!!! MY LITTLE COLONIAL ORGANISMS! MY PRECIOUS WEIRDLY SHAPED TUBES! THEY'RE SO SILLY!

thank you so MUCH you are so sweet ☹️☹️☹️ 079 is just a little computer guy he's silly

MC will warm up eventually they're just in the pissy pipline 😭 i don't blame them given their situation i'd be mad as hell ldeak ak ck you're so sweet tysm😭

#marurubb #author #answered #ask #pansophical pretender #scp #scp 079 #scp 035